#also there's such idk. casual queerness to the whole story that really makes it very dnd-esque | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hxhhasmysoul · 10 months

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even if gege was nonbinary as you clam he still didn’t care or develop the female characters in his stories 🤷🏻‍♀️ they all died or were sidelined and only maki got some development and that’s disproportional compared to the male characters. being lgbt does not make an author less likely to be misogynistic, that’s a stupid take.

i'm not saying gege is nonbinary, you completely missed the point of my previous answer. saying gege is nonbinary is gendering them. nonbinary is a type of gender that some people have, there are various types of that kind of gender. you clearly don't understand basic gender related issues, idk how am i even supposed to respond to you.

from what i've seen, and i'm in no way a queer or gender researcher, just a casual observer, there are people who have one of the 2 binary genders, there are various flavours of nonbinary genders, there are people who are gender fluid or have multiple genders (and yes i've also seen both the takes that these kinds of genders fall under the nonbinary umbrella and the takes that say they don't and i will not under any circumstance take a stance on that) and there are people who are agender who reject the whole idea of gender, they have their own individual takes on it.

and the whole point with gege akutami is that officially gege didn't subscribe to any gender. they don't disclose their gender and the respectful thing to do is not to gender them. especially not to gender them as an excuse to dehumanise them.

please don't misrepresent or define for me what my takes are, don't do it to anyone actually. it's rude, for one, like gendering people who specifically don't provide their gender. but it actually makes you look bad in a discussion, it significantly weakens your point and makes you look silly because you're arguing against made up things. but also it's an abuse tactic and i have a history of abuse and it's actually slightly triggering to me. this last thing is actually crucial why you shouldn't put words in other people's mouth, you don't know what they've been through and how much something like that may affect them. so doing that just to "win" an internet argument is really inappropriate.

i have never implied that being part of a minority makes one immune to bigotry towards a different minority, or even their own. it's actually something i've talked about angainst before in the context of a hxh harassment campaign a few years ago where people said that they can't be racist because they are some kind of queer, or a different kind of poc than the person they targeted.

it seems to me that you take the zerosum attitude to feminism which is a choice. i think it's a very performative internet leftist choice but you do you.

if you're actually interested in what i think about jjk female characters, and why i think jjk is actually doing some stuff right regarding feminism and why calling it and especially the author misogynist is in bad faith read this. it's long, it's not perfect and replies to very particular statements made by someone i'm actually friends with rn, but it's pretty exhaustive. it also applies feminism in a way that isn't as simplistic as trying to count percentages of female character whatever to male character whatever.

#answering asks #i implore you to do better anon #you're not really winning as a fighter for feminism when you can't apply basic gender related courtesy to others #modern feminism that is actually intersectional and not radfem flavoured is very closely married to gender theory #if you keep coming at me with this attitude and aggressively misrepresent my opinions #i will block you because my patience to explain things to people who don't seem interested in a serious media criticism #and just want to dunk on me and something i love is limited #please keep that in mind

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aroaceconfessions · 2 years

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We gotta stop blaming cishetallos for problems from inside the community for a sec or we will be wasting effort on the wrong target.

Like, this sounds crazy, I know, but hear me out: they don't know we exist. Not saying if they knew they would be fine with it, in my experience a homophobe, a biphobe, a panphobe or a transphobe will be also amisiac once they learn about us. The thing is most of them have yet to learn we exist. Our allies are almost all of them other queer people but that also means that the prejudice we feel as aromantics, asexuals and people on the spectrum also comes from within the queer community.

I realized this reading posts from trans people, specially non-binary, mogais and such, about some specific prejudice they go through and how, to overcome them, they needed to stop pretending it was coming from an outsider who in most cases don't even know they exist. Those who do it unconsciously need to be told they are doing it so they can stop, and those who know well what they are doing need to be either re-educated or fought off. No social media network do shit when you report an arophobic or acephobic content/account, so people know there are no consequences to it and guys… lying to ourselves ain't gonna solve shit.

If we don't start acknowledging that as a community — the lgbt+ one, the queer one —, an yearly post saying we are loved while still practicing aphobia, even if you aren't aware, not only doesn't suffice but harms us, and that most of the aphobes who are aware of their actions and intend to act as such are from within the community we will make absolute no progress.

We barely are taken serious when we talk about the need for positive representation, we will just be stuck in this cycle of "we exist, we are valid, we are not faking". We won't ever go to the "our identity is not a mental illness symptom nor a trauma indicator, make it illegal to use it for diagnosis" and "the laws and most contracts for any kind of service does not consider people who are non-partnering and limits us in many ways, reconsider them" or "rights who are only given to partnered people are not rights but privileges".

It's Okay to call out someone when they are doing harm even they think they are doing good. It isn't mean or ungrateful. It's necessary.

We went through the "aspec people are not inherently LGBT". The different in nature of it from other exclusionist movements [as in how those movements began and were treated by the community (some really starting from outsiders), and how what we are going through since the mid 2010s began and is treated], should be more than telling. We need to make people realize that it shouldn't be treated as just a casual thing to be an exclusionist, we need to de-normalize this mentality of its okay to support the community while excluding A-spec people. People should be angry too. I wish they would start getting angry too because is so very tiring to make post like "if it was an *another lgbt identity* you would be angry" everytime something aphobic happens not only because it's a painful truth that doesn't seem to get better but because there will always be someone there to twist our words.

I don't know how to articulate this but what I mean is we gotta focus the whole awareness inwards a bit, the explaining, stop blinding ourselves from the clear truth.

Most people who don't know about us will learn about us from allo-allos. We don't have the platform to spread awareness as strongly so of course the help is appreciated but everytime I scroll through idk tiktok I see someone trying to be supportive and explain what is Aro, what is ace, what is demi, and such, but saying it in a very vague and, surprisingly more often, very damaging way and I'm thankful for the effort, I really am, but… you gotta be aware of who will be telling your story.

#aromantic #asexual #aroace #aphobia

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musclesandhammering · 3 years

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I'm not fond of the pairing but from what I've seen General public actually loves Sylki very much. Even the trade reviews called the relationship "genius" which,,,ok. Someone did a poll on various platforms, yt, reddit, fb, twitter etc comparing which ship is better (Lokius or Sylki) and it was Sylki who won by large margin in the end. I suppose mostly they just don't care because it's sci fi and a pairing in a totally unrealistic show, and after Wandavision I guess weird ships are 'in' but yeah it makes you think. But the writers already said they won't give in to the fan pressure bc they have their own story to tell (which ok, valid, you do you) but idk. I guess we will get even more Sylki in second season. Tom already said Loki won't stop searching for her

Sometimes I think casual fans are the most irritating thing about being in a fandom :/

Just as a disclaimer (bc I don’t want people coming for me): I think lokius is really cute, and I love fics/art/headcanons about them, but I never thought they were canonically romantically interested in each other. I never thought lokius was gonna be canon, and I never wanted it to (because I didn’t want ANY romance in the series), so I don’t even include it in my argument against s*lki.

Ok so….. listen. This is gonna be a long ass post, so I’m putting it under a cut. Sorry, anon, but you’re the one that opened the Worm Can.

The viewing public, in general, tends to heavily skew towards heterosexual-presenting ships. Partially because a portion of the general audiences are homophobic, and partially because a lot of non-tumblr fans are so sick of hearing tumblr stans go on and on and on about how they were queerbaited by certain gay ships not becoming canon, when in reality, said ships are trash.

Listen. I sympathise with that. I get that. I know I’m beating a hornet’s nest with this, but…. D*stiel? J*hnlock? St*cky? None of those were written in any way to invoke queer undertones, they were always supposed to be platonic, and tbfh even as platonic relationships the first two are literally toxic and abusive as hell, anyway.

So I definitely understand how a casual straight fan on Twitter or Instagram would see some of those same crazy “we were queerbaited” tumblr stans ranting about lokius not becoming canon and how much s*lki sucks and……. it makes sense that they’d be like “These people are just pissed that their gay ship isn’t canon, that’s why they hate s*lki.”

But here’s the thing. I don’t think those people realise how callous it is to say something like that when the only reason queer kids are so quick to ship any two male characters who express a modicum of affection for one another, is that they’re so fucking starved for representation in the first place, they’re willing to see queer romance in any same-sex interaction. They’re just that desperate. That’s where the whole crazy gay stan thing comes from. And yeah, it’s annoying that these people put their whole chest into defending gay ships that are total trash, but you have to realise why they do it.

So, what I’m saying is, for s*lki shippers- who are already winning, because their straight ship had the privilege of easily becoming canon despite all its flaws- to look at queer people who are frustrated to the point of tears that they were once again conned out of any form of queer rep (for the mcu’s first canon queer character, for gods sake) after actually genuinely being queerbaited this time (with his bisexuality/genderfluidity)….. and to essentially gloat that their straight ship became canon and taunt queer people by saying “oh you’re just desperate for two men to kiss”………… idk, man. It just seems real cold to me. Reeks of straight privilege and heteronormativity.

Ok, so with that being said.. let me respond to your actual ask lol.

I’m not surprised at all that s*lki won the popularity polls. I think a large reason for that is the fact that it was pitted against lokius, which sorta rubs a lot of casual viewers the wrong way for reasons listed above. I’m also not surprised that casual viewers liked it outside of its opposition to lokius- because, um, casual viewers aren’t very smart.

They tend to analyse exactly nothing, they don’t look any deeper than the surface, and if the writers of a show stick a hot man and woman together under a blanket, they eat it up. Because the narrative tells them it’s sweet. Just like the narrative tells them Loki is a greasy asshole who had no character development up until this point, and they eat that up too. Just like the narrative tells them that sylvie’s the best thing since sliced bread, and they eat that up too. Just like the narrative tells them it’s completely in character for Loki to try to subjugate a group of 3 random Mongolians in the middle of the dessert for absolutely no reason other than his “narcissism”, and they eat that up too. Just like the narrative tells them that one throwaway line about liking “a bit of both” is somehow this groundbreaking example of lgbt representation, and they eat that up too……… See the pattern here?

And as far as being concerned about the pseudo-incest angle, I don’t even think casual fans even dug that deep. They literally just saw two main characters- a pretty white woman and a hot white man- doing cool fight scenes together and giving each other goo goo eyes, and they were automatically sold.

And the writers saying “we won’t give in to fan pressure, we have our own story to tell” is honestly complete bullshit. What the hell is the POINT of working for a corporate film company and telling a story on screen if not to please the fans??? They do what they do to get people to watch their shows to get lots of money. That’s literally what they’re there for. Mike Waldron must have a pretty damn inflated sense of self importance if he thinks his own “artistic vision” or what the hell ever is the priority here lmao.

And I wanna be mad about Season 2, I really do. But at this point Season 1 ruined the character so much for me that I legitimately don’t even care what direction they take him in.

#this is probably all over the place and semi-incomprehensible but oh well #sometimes ya just gotta rant #topic: queerbaiting in cinema #loki deserved better #antisylki #anti mike waldron #anti sylvie #@marvel I hate you #anti casual fans #frosty bby #queerbaiting #anti loki series #loki series critical #loki series negativity #ask #anon #language tw

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chekhovs-harpoon · 3 years

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❤️ (favorite romantic relationship) and 🥉(three podcasts you would recommend to get someone into podcasts) for the ask game!

❤️ (favorite romantic relationship): sayer/hale <3 idk just something cute and fucked up about a horror story about a murder ai whose only feelings are anger and annoyance growing Fond of its human test subject and vessel because of the mortifying ordeal of having to Depend on another person and seeing oneself in the other Honorable mention to arthur/john from malevolent podcast for the same reasons. those reasons being the inherent homoeroticism of sharing one's body with another man

🥉(three podcasts you would recommend to get someone into podcasts) : my basis for recommending shows to ppl new to podcasting is that they gotta be short, both in minutes per ep, and number of eps so it won't be intimidating; the story be relatively straightforward and easy to follow; and that the voices are distinct/there aren't too many of em in a pod 1. Mina's story: cuz the whole thing is so short like u can literally finish it in less than half an hour and it will make you Feel so much. it's a good introduction to the epistolary/audio diary format so common to pods. it exemplifies how for most pods, the plot is emotional continuity. like, the story begins with the mc not wanting to face the present and let herself love cuz of grief so she escapes into the future. where she ends up in a safe space where she feels comfortable letting herself love again ;-; also i think like if you're first getting into pods, you'll be surprised at how casually queer they are and i think this pod is a good intro to that 2. Supernatural Sexuality with Dr. Seabrooke: the fictional radio advice format is easy to follow for ppl new into pods cuz those are a real thing. but the callers being monsters is enough of a twist to distinguish it from those irl radio shows/nonfiction. the short stand alone eps are easy to jump straight into. and it's just very sincere and wholesome and queer in a way i don't see as much in other media. Also, everything i said abt this show is also equally applicable to monstrous agonies 3. Spines: good intro to how podcasts tend to do horror cuz the spooks is more from really good vibes and a sense of aesthetics and making the listener imagine indescribable things, rather than just jumpscares and scary murder monsters and ghouls trying to kill. also, the queer love story, the themes of community, and the really hopeful ending, exemplify how horror pods are very good at balancing dark dreary settings with hope and optimism

#podcast blogging #replies #long post #tnx for the ask i miss talking abt podcasts at great length like this #sayer #malevolent podcast #mina's story #spines podcast #supernatural sexuality with dr seabrooke

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zhilan · 3 years

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was debating on voicing this or not, but saw a convo on talking about something similar so thought to share. Even if there's some true Melby fans, it feels like straight shippers have convinced the Charmed writers to go with Melby, and by extent straight shippers got to speak over queer fans on a queer story. Melby still feels forced and I just can't really back it up. I feel bad for Bethany, who apparently is gay herself, having people have this talk about a character she plays. 1/2

Pre Charmed I was one that never really saw much difference if it was a gay or hetro person playing a gay character. I never saw the big deal about whether a person of x sexuality or race wrote about a gay or poc characters. Charmed changed that, with Melonie Diaz seemingly being anti Abimel, not understanding why people shipp them. The writer stuff is self explanatory at this point, sad it feels like ppl r ok with gays getting less if it's cis het pocs benefiting. (2/2)

Okay, so a lot of things here but first we'll talk about Melby. I agree there are some people who do genuinely like them (but they’re few tbh). I was one of the people genuinely excited for Melby when Ruby was first introduced - especially because I was feeling zero chemistry from MelKat and I was so relieved they replaced Kat with Ruby as a love interest because for me personally, I do think Melby does have chemistry and I was into it. But the season progressed... and nothing. My big problem with Melby is that their entire relationship was developed offscreen, and the very very very little that we do have onscreen doesn't really have much continuity. I mean. Here's a summary of their development (like this is ALL the Melby content leading up to the ILY:

2x12, they meet

2x13, they wake up in bed together (awesome, we never even saw their first kiss LOL), end of episode they decide to be casual

2x19, they break up (even though they weren't even a couple??)

3x02, they're back together without addressing the issue with magic

3x06, they break up, again. make up again.

3x12, they're saying i love you

Like... literally WHAT?! what?!?! I've seen many poorly written wlw relationships (because that seems to be a standard for a lot of shows) but damn, Melby takes it to a whole new level. And I think the thing that makes it even more frustrating, is that the fact is literally all the other wlw ships, canon and non-canon (that's Melko, Melda, Melkat and Abimel) ... ALL have better writing, better build-up and better development that Melby has. It's the fact that we've had better wlw writing before this, that's why it's harder to just be okay with it because we know the writers are actually capable of doing better, so why are we stuck with a non-existent ship instead? I’d take Melko, Melda, Abimel and even Melkat whom I don’t really like - over Melby because they all actually have content. And Jada, Niko, Kat and Abigael are their own person, instead of a love interest written to fit Mel in whatever way is convenient (which is a whole other issue too). And it feels even more unfair when you consider Melby only gets about a tenth of screentime compared to the het ships on the show when Mel is just as much a lead character as her sisters.

And so yeah. And it sucks and it’s annoying because it’s mostly the straight people shoving it down our throats - blaming the lack of investment for Melby on racism when it literally has nothing to do with that, and everything to do with - again, the lack of everything! (And omfg, is2g when it’s the white cishets telling qwoc who ship Abimel we’re racist.... stfu perhaps??) Honestly, Melby scenes for me are cute - on their own, without context bec with context it just sucks. They’re enjoyable, but they’re not exciting because the best part about shipping is the build-up, the waiting-for-it-to-happen. Melby had none of that. And that’s usually the part where you start getting invested on a ship, yk. At least that’s how it is for me.

As for Bethany, yeah I agree it sucks because... I mean I don’t know her, but I follow her Insta and she seems like a genuinely nice person (with a super cute cat!) and idk I mean I haven’t seen people tagging her or anything when expressing disappointment with Melby so I don’t think she’s aware of the discourse. (I hope, because she deserves better than that) but honestly none of the criticism for Melby falls on Bethany. It’s not her fault at all. It’s on the showrunners for having it play out the way that it has.

And Melonie. I mean yeah. I have nothing against her, really. But as far as wlw representation goes, we know that she has a voice in the writers room from one of her interviews and even Abimel aside since that’s not the canon ship, I feel like it’s important to notice that even for Melby she doesn’t really push for more of it. She seems very content with what we’re given (which is next to nothing lbr) and I’m kinda meh about it — and I agree this is where the difference between having hets play gay characters matter. Because gay people will usually push for better gay representation because it’s personal to them and they know exactly what it means to the audience. Like look at how Chyler Leigh from Supergirl is constantly pushing for better wlw. And of course that’s not to say hets never do that because some do (like Azie Tesfai, for example bless her soul), but then for some it’s just a job. And to be clear, I’m not hating on Melonie for not doing more, but I think it’s also true that an actual lgbt actor might make more effort.

** I always think there should definitely be poc writers for poc characters though, that’s non-negotiable. And lgbt writers for shows with lgbt characters. Charmed is lacking in both, unfortunately.

#inbox #charmed 2018 #abimel #long post #the anti's are actually rly annoying tbh #like we can all have our opinions #or we should #but no the anti's wanna shove their opinions down our throats #and can't stand that not everyone agrees w them and not everyone sees it the way they do #i don't like their het ship but i dont go picking fights and calling them delusional for it #smh. i mean well. twitter specifically #tumblr's generally peaceful thank god

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thatblueshade · 2 years

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Hey darling, just read your theory and found it really well connected! Lets hope for some caos! But you never said anything about my policeman and I believe that it is an important point in all this, due to the topic and interviews that we are probably getting with it. How do you think it fits there?

Thanks! and honestly, I'm not sure.

I think it will definitely have a lot to do with Harry's coming out, might even be the way he does it.

I can picture two things happening:

He “casually” comes out as not straight (kinda like Joshua Bassett did), not using a label, saying something like “being a part of this movie was really important for me because as a queer person myself I understand how important it is to talk more about all the things us queer people have had and still have to go through” or something like that. OR

Everyone has said he did amazing in the movie so assuming he wins some important award for it like a golden globe or something like that, he could use the opportunity and more seriously talk about, obviously not mentioning the fact that all his girlfriends have been fake but still not denying or confirming anything other than the fact that he is not straight.

Another option is, through his music.

There is still at least one music video we haven't seen, “duvet” and there were those rumors that said that there would be a Harry music video with a male love interest. I am still not very sure of if it's true but idk.

If he does this then it could also align with my policeman.

From what we know, the movie is almost ready bc the screenings were I think about a month ago and the reviews in general were really good.

So let's say they release a first teaser soon, idk maybe June bc it's pride month, and then that's when harry releases that music video with a male love interest.

That way the queer community won't be mad bc they think he is straight and queer roles should be played by queer actors.

Also, if this happens he would come out while still being with Cockburn which is better than doing it single, that way it will be like “don't worry everyone, he is not straight but he is still dating a woman so he is not fully gay either!” yk what i mean?

He could also pull a Lil Naz by releasing medicine as a single, he could do a music video with people from all genders but finally kissing a guy, scandalizing everyone and making it an insanely popular song, it would be a great pr move bc it would definitely top the charts so...

Like I said, he will not label himself, and he will not talk about all his fake girlfriends or anything like that.

Louis won't have to do much with this whole thing though I do see him throwing slight shade to O and absolutely praising My policeman.

Edit: i just realized I didn't say anything about Eros so, i think that if asked about H's acting career Louis will focus more on this roll than any of the others bc he is a big marvel fan, they could even use the narrative that even though they weren't super close friends Harry called Louis and Liam to tell them that he was going to be a part of the MCU.

So Louis would be all “oh yeah, my policeman is amazing, the story and the directing are incredible and harry did great, don't worry darling is also really good the acting was great. i still can't believe he is a part of the MCU now though [and then procedes to rant about his love for marvel and how cool it is that Harry is a part of it now]”

But yeah, those are my thoughts!

Thanks so much for the question! I'm going to link it to the post to clear up all this.

#closeting #harry styles #lgbtqiia+#queer #theory #coming out #my policeman #don't worry darling

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lilydalexf · 4 years

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Old School X is a project interviewing X-Files fanfic authors who were posting fic during the original run of the show. New interviews are posted every Tuesday.

Interview with JET

The first story by JET (Jesemie's Evil Twin) was posted at Gossamer in 1999. You probably remember if you've read any of her stories because she has a unique voice among the many authors of X-Files fanfic. Many of her stories are at Gossamer, but some that aren't there include "Small Lives Awake" and two little fics in its universe, "Imagination" and an Untitled fic. Big thanks to JET for doing this interview.

Does it surprise you that people are still interested in reading your X-Files fanfics and others that were posted during the original run of the show (1993-2002)?

Honestly, yes. I mean, it's nice, but a little bit surreal. What I feel highly conscious of is that the show premiered 27 years ago; some days that feels like 27 centuries ago. But maybe only because this year has lasted 27 centuries? idk

What do you think of when you think about your X-Files fandom experience? What did you take away from it?

I got so lucky finding the group of kind, smart, crazy talented writers I found, and it was sheer dumb luck because I was so incredibly dippy and both underwhelmed by the interwebs of the time (frames! Netscape! whatever was up with Geocities and all those freakin' starscape backgrounds!) and overwhelmed by things like newsgroups (I still have literally no idea how those worked, but there seemed to be 900 kazillion XF fans there). It was great to find a bunch of people who liked the show at the same level I did (cough, A Normal Amount, cough), though in some ways that seems like the bonus to simply having found such a wonderful group of people with whom I am still in contact. The real government conspiracies with hostile extraterrestrials were the friends I made along the way...or something like that.

Social media didn't really exist during the show's original run. How were you most involved with the X-Files online (atxc, message board, email mailing list, etc.)?

A few writers had their own websites (I guess that's what those were?) that I'd lurk around, but mostly I was loyal to a couple of email mailing lists and LiveJournal. Unsurprisingly to anyone who's met me, I was bad at keeping up with them; I did try to, though. (Am I remembering correctly that folks started leaving LJ when Russia got involved somehow? The post-show 2000s are a big blur to me now.)

What was it that got you hooked on the X-Files as a show?

Quite specifically, that poor dude who coughs up a baby fluke in the shower during "The Host". That such a thing -- in retrospect, a nifty and deeply gross practical effect -- had made it onto network TV blew my mind. I did also love Scully and Mulder very quickly. They seemed like such engaging grown ups in all the right ways: intelligent, hard working, clever, loyal to each other, and, if you recall early season two, wearing some of the saddest bureaucrat suits and sporting the least flattering haircuts I'd ever seen on screen. <3

What got you involved with X-Files fanfic?

I have a vague recollection that I had been reading fanfic for something like a year and finally had a story I wanted to try writing. Shout out to Jill Selby for being the nicest, most supportive first reader anyone could have asked for.

What is your relationship like now to X-Files fandom?

I think of it very fondly! I've otherwise stepped away almost entirely.

Were you involved with any fandoms after the X-Files? If so, what was it like compared to X-Files?

I have been in much, much, much more peripheral ways. Partly that's because Life; I don't in general have the kind of free time I had as a college student and part-time employee (and free time circa 1999 was time I should've been using to study or go full-time at my then-job or whatever). I think perhaps because I had such a special, legit lovely experience with XF fandom -- and because I'm still friends with so many people from that time -- I've never much wanted to throw myself into another fandom at the same level.

Do you ever still watch The X-Files or think about Mulder and Scully?

In small doses, yes. I wasn't a casual viewer back in the day and I'm still not, so I watch a few eps here and there when I know I'll have time to really enjoy them but not so much time that I'll become a complete addict again. In an age of ~peak TV~ there seem to be 782 new shows annually, and I maybe watch 1 of them, and they never seem to remind me much of XF -- which either means I've missed the shows that have been influenced by XF or the show has retained a kind of singularity. Honestly, I suspect (or maybe just hope) it's the latter.

Do you ever still read X-Files fic? Fic in another fandom?

I reread Kipler and Penumbra's XF stories every so often and grind my teeth with continued jealousy. But most of my fic consumption these days is in Black Sails (QUEER PIRATES TRYING TO OVERTHROW ENGLAND. PLEASE WATCH BLACK SAILS), Superbat (Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne), and The Witcher. (Have I seen The Witcher? No. Have I read the books? The first one and maybe 1/6 of the second one. Have I played the video games or read the comics? No. Has that stopped me from reading fic? No.)

What is your favorite of your own fics, X-Files and/or otherwise?

Oh man, I have never been able to pick favorites. That said, "Unwritten" was possibly the sparest story I wrote and I still really like the imagery in it.

Do you think you'll ever write another X-Files story? Or dust off and post an oldie that for whatever reason never made it online?

Never say never. No plans to write anything else in XF at present. (This does make me wonder, though, if there're any drafts on an old somehow-still-active email account somewhere...)

Do your friends and family know about your fic and, if so, what have been their reactions?

Ha haha ahaha, no. (Well, my mom knows I was in a ~writing group~. Thankfully, she has never asked for further details.) Like. It amazes and charms me that, say, someone who is in high school right now may feel exactly 0 hesitation in sharing their fannishness with everyone, everywhere. Fandom is much more understood and accepted as a hobby/way of life/style goals, I think, than it was 25 years ago. But the whole reason I went online in 1997 to look for XF fans was because all the sweet people in my offline life who watched the show were, hmm-- What's a nice way of saying that talking to them about the show was like chewing tinfoil? Compartmentalization has served me well for decades now. :D

(Posted by Lilydale on July 28, 2020)

#new post #old school x #xfiles fanfic #xf fanfic #jesemie's evil twin #jet #xf fanfic author interviews

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outoftheframework · 5 years

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Batkids nominating Bruce for Queer Eye is dead-ass the funniest thing I’ve read all day. It would be great, imagine Alfred in the little video cards just sassing Bruce for being useless at everything

sigh...

if I must...

The Batkids nominating Bruce for Queer Eye: A SAGA

based off of this post

-As most things do around here, it started as a joke

-Duke, off hand in the batcave after Bruce takes off his mask to reveal super sweaty and matted hair: “jonathan van ness is quaking.”

-The second the words slipping his lips it was a running joke

-Tim, pulling out Bruce’s original suit with blue underwear over the pants: “What would Tan France say if he saw this, huh? Do you want to give the man a heart attack?”

-Bruce: *deliriously making himself kraft mac and cheese at 3am* Dick, through the intercom: “Are you even gonna add avocado to that or do I have to call Antoni?”

-Babs sends a poster from queer eye in the group chat, stating that they need applicants from Gotham for the upcoming season

-The group chat name is promptly changed to “karamo brown is batman and i have proof” and then once more to “make gotham gay again”

-Tim takes leadership over creating his nomination video, which everyone thought was probably a bad idea

-But he ends up creating a really sappy story about a man who has given himself to bettering the lives and his children and their friends and has forgotten about taking care of himself in the process

-However the kids do start telling increasingly wild stories about him to one-up each other and to try to really secure Bruce a spot on the show

-”One time I asked Bruce to pick me up moisturizer at the store and he just brought back a bottle of water. I don’t even think he knows what skin care is.”

-”Bruce has never cooked anything in his life besides boxed mac and cheese and toast. He can’t even make cereal. I’ve seen him try.”

-After their application is sent in, life catches up and they get distracted by work, school, and nightly activities. But after some time, Tim gets an email while on patrol.

-Everyone thinks he got injured because he screamed so loud

-The day comes where the guys were set to arrive to surprise Bruce (the kids doctored a fake introduction video for him so he would have zero idea)

-The kids all sit at the breakfast table, waiting for Bruce to come downstairs while the Queer Eye guys plus a camera crew hide behind the door

-Suddenly a crash is heard from upstairs, followed by angry footsteps, and a tired, sloppy dressed Bruce entering the kitchen

-*deep breath* ”tiMOTHY HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO LEAVE YOUR SKATEBOARD-”

-The door bursts open and Bruce stands there flabbergasted my the unfamiliar men and camera crew in his kitchen at 8 am on a Monday

-He lowers his head into his hands to hide the bags underneath his eyes. “Please god.. let this be a bad dream... I can’t do this again...”

-Jonathan comes running up and hugs him, stroking his stubbly beard.

-Tan politely roasts his baggy sweatpants and ripped t-shirt as Antoni and Bobby explore the immaculate kitchen and Karamo introduces himself to all the kids

-Bruce’s episode is titled “Money Does Not Make the Man”

-Tan is overwhelmed by the amount of tailored black suits Bruce owns

-He puts him into more casual yet age-appropriate street wear

-Bruce purposely buys one shirt because he knows that Dick owns it and wears it often

-Jonathan almost faints when he looks in Bruce’s bathroom and only sees shaving cream on his vanity

-Bruce ends up with a clean-shaven face and a nine-step beauty routine, including two (2) face masks

-Jonathan is constantly play-flirting with Bruce and the kids absolutely crumble when he flirts back

-Bobby makes over the common area of the Gotham City Orphanage instead of redoing any of the manor

-He does a little extra work through funding from WE

-Karamo has a heart-to-heart with Bruce

-At first Bruce is very closed off and annoyed that his kids forced him into this

-But as the week goes on, Bruce opens up more about how proud he is of his kids even though they can be overwhelming a lot of the time

-Antoni teaches Bruce how to make a healthy and easy family meal for Sunday dinner

-Alfred sheds a tear

-Bruce’s reveal is just a small house party with family and friends where he got dressed up in his new clothes and cooked for everyone

-The guys melt when watching the video and seeing him talk on and on about how happy he was to get his whole family together despite initially being reluctant

-He makes a killer guacamole

-Dick shows up to see that he and Bruce are wearing the same shirt

-Bruce gives a speech about being thankful for his life, family, and friends despite the the ups and downs

-He ends it by announcing that all the kids are still grounded for tricking him

-The Queer Eye group comes over for Sunday dinner sometimes and is also available by phone any time Bruce needs some sense knocked into him

-All in all, it started out as a meme and ended up as a very positive experience for the whole family. Though it is still a huge meme on the internet, though.

____________

I could create a whole post as just quotes from the episode but IDK if anyone wants that lol

Thanks for reading!

Check out my imagines blog!!

Thanks for the inspiration, @thelampofthemoment

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microsuedemouse · 4 years

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man it has been a MINUTE since I made my own post about anything fandom-related on this website but @suzirya is blogging about The Old Guard and I haven’t seen anyone else talking about it really and I’ve got. some thoughts

I had literally never heard of this movie at all until a few nights ago when we were eating dinner in the living room and my dad pulled it up and said ‘hey I want to watch this’ and played the trailer for my brother and me. We were pretty much like yeah, sure, we all enjoy a good action flick, and aside from my other brother (who was occupied with D&D) it ended up being the whole family watching it. and I enjoyed it WAY more than I’d anticipated, especially for something I’d never heard about.

if you don’t know what I’m talking about: drop what you’re doing and go watch The Old Guard on Netflix. (it’s a Netflix original so yes it will be there.) it’s a very fun and good action film based on a series of graphic novels about a small group of immortals trying to do what’s right. there are many selling points but one of them is that it will be very good for your little gay soul, bc Charlize Theron stars (in a character with no explicitly-stated romances but lots of relationships that will make you Feel Things) and two of the other main characters are two men who met during the Crusades and are just amazingly in love with each other. And not in a vague way that the straights can interpret as Powerful Friendship. They are explicitly in love with each other and so devoted and ugh.

ANYWAY. putting the rest of my chattering under a cut bc spoilers and also I’m a wordy piece of shit

1 - early in this movie I was thinking about how glad I am that Charlize Theron has stepped into this role of like... cool female action star, but also, her characters are never super sexed up. almost any female characters I can think of in action movies, if they’re part of the action rather than victims/bystanders, are always made sexy. even when they’re Strong sexy, they’re still... a lot sometimes? I was thinking especially of some Angelina Jolie stuff, Scarlett Johanssen, etc. there are probably lots of exceptions to this that I just don’t know but still - we’ve had Theron in several roles like this recently, and appearance-wise she’s treated with the same respect as her male counterparts, which is so fucking cool and also such a fucking relief. we all love beautiful ladies, obviously, but it’s so SO good to see our female heroes just doing their jobs, without us ever being made aware of their sexuality.

and as the movie went on this was hitting me more and more, and I was also thinking it about... everyone? like. the other female lead, played by KiKi Layne, was arguably more feminine than Theron but not any more sexualised. even once she’s out of her army fatigues she’s dressed with practicality in mind, and again, we never have her female-ness pointed out to us. and I was so about every bit of that. both objectively and as a person whose relationship to female-ness and femininity is kind of weird, it’s such a good thing to see leading women whose gender and appearances and bodies aren’t being focussed on that way.

and as a sidebar to that, while I wouldn’t describe any of the prominent male characters as unattractive by any means, none of them were like... Marvel-actor hot. and I just, idk, especially in action/superhero movies, that’s refreshing to me. a lot of them looked like Regular Dudes in a way that I find very appealing.

2 - can we TALK about Joe and Nicky. holy shit. my brother and I kept leaning over to each other to be like ‘if anything happens to either of them I’ll riot.’ I MEAN.

we got a genuine, explicit, on-screen established romance between these men. it was not implied, it was not just how the actors played it in the hopes that people would catch on - it was right there. they hold each other to sleep, they kiss each other with such love, they talk to other characters about how much they adore each other. they met during the Crusades. they’ve been in love for centuries! and they’re so sweet, so devoted, so adoring! and they never have any arguments or tension to further the plot (one of my personal most-hated plot devices in any story with an established relationship). they just spend this movie loving each other, protecting each other and their weird little family, doing anything they can for each other. they’re taken prisoner and spend their time awake joking and making each other smile. and the one singular bit of casual homophobia they encounter on-screen is met with a declaration of love so heartfelt and intense that the guy who made the shitty comment literally doesn’t know what to say - which is a brief but extremely good scene in the movie, imo.

oh, also worth noting: this romance is biracial and interfaith (inasmuch as either of them may be men of faith after being alive for centuries). just to add to how good this is to see on-screen. all of this on top of them being IMMORTAL AND UNKILLABLE. NO GAYS BURIED HERE

2.5 - can I talk for a second about how goddamn much I love seeing non-hetero romance in genre fiction!!! I know it’s getting easier to find, but still. genre fiction is very much my domain and I love seeing queer romance there, especially when it’s simply an accepted fact and the characters’ queerness isn’t central to the story. narratives about queerness are good and important and serve a function but most of them aren’t really my thing, personally. a story that’s about all kinds of other things but also has queer characters there, being themselves, being in love, is so 1000% my shit.

3 - also? Charlize Theron’s character, Andy?? fascinating from a queer perspective. she doesn’t have any explicitly-stated romance with anyone, but her relationships with other characters are so compelling and so interesting. The backstory about her and another immortal, Quynh, very very distinctly gives you the impression that they were women in love. everything about Andy’s guilt and bitterness over not having been able to find/save Quynh feels so much like there was a romance there. it could have been platonic or familial - they were together, without anyone else, for centuries at least, and therefore obviously developed a very deep love - but the way Andy talks about Quynh it feels so much like there was something left unsaid, or unresolved.

also, her scene with the clerk in the pharmacy. oh my god. this woman clearly recognises that whatever is going on with Andy, something is wrong, and she offers her help, no questions asked. she takes her into the back room and patches up her wound. this scene has such an inherent intimacy because of the close quarters and the privacy and the act taking place, but... there’s also this really interesting connection happening between them, where they recognise something in one another but don’t state it. (personally, I couldn’t help wondering if the clerk was a domestic abuse survivor, maybe? but there are so many ways you could interpret her character from her behaviour and dialogue in that scene, and I’d love to see other people’s takes.)

and then on the other hand you have her relationship with Booker, who’s been with her the longest out of any of the living immortals. they’re incredible. their relationship is so, so interesting and well-depicted! they have such chemistry, that you can easily read as romantic or platonic. they’ve been together for so many hundreds of years and they work together, trust each other, with such a deep understanding and love and respect. and it never quite tips over into the romance you kind of think it will, which imo only makes it that much more compelling - there are so many directions you could take that dynamic.

4 - and then on the topic of Booker: I am SO into the way his betrayal was handled.

he did, undeniably, betray the others. there’s no argument on that fact. his motivations were understandable (and heartbreaking), even to Andy, though certainly not an excuse. so yes, they were furious with him. reasonably so! but... that didn’t actually break their relationships with him. they didn’t leave him behind in the lab, even if in some ways they might have wanted to. and in the ensuing battle, they were still able to work together and trust each other as they always have. the damage done to their larger relationship was put aside to be dealt with after all of this, as it should be. and even when they did deal with it, what they agreed on was just a century of exile from their group. given the lives they’re all living, that seems like such a mild sentence.

but to me, it makes so much sense. again, these people have lived for centuries, and there are so few of them. they need each other. the bonds they’ve formed over all this time together - the trust, the love, the sense of family - would not only be vital to both their survival and their sanity, but also incredibly difficult to truly break. what he did would seem unforgivable from an outside perspective, and even after that century passed I’m certain he’d have to earn back their trust and respect, but it makes absolute sense that they’d be willing to take him back one day.

god. GOD. I’m sure there’s more I could talk about but this is what I can think of right now and I’ve been typing for like forty minutes probably so I’m done for now but.

god.

this movie and its characters GOT ME, guys. I’m really in it. ugh UGH

#the old guard #Courtney talks

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urproblematicfav-arsonk · 4 years

Text

There's a lot of things about Borderlands 3 that makes it kinda a garbage game. And all of those things are valid and true but a aspect of bl3 that deeply bothers me isn't something I've really seen people talk about?? Maybe they have but I missed it but I want to say my interpretation. (Also like, spoiler warning throughout all of this post)

To start off with: hi, I'm a autistic afab nonbinary person and this is relevant for this little rant I'm bout to go on.

I want to begin by stating why I love this franchise so much.

Borderlands, whether you like it or not, is INCREDIBLY queer. And not in a coded kind of way, it's just flat out gay as fuck. And that means so fucking much to me. Borderlands 2 was one of the first times I ever felt fully represented in a game. Zer0 being this dumbass making Yugioh references and generally being a fun garbage boy and also being nonbinary meant a lot to me and I adore him to this day (nonbinary people can use gendered pronouns fuc off). And getting more and more into this series and finding out that basically every character was on some level queer was really cool to me. Maya being asexual and most of the characters being attracted to multiple genders so honestly and off handily was so refreshing and amazing to get to play through. The casual mentions of a woman's wife or some man's husband in the echo's you find or Moxxi talking about her ex girlfriends was one of the reasons I loved this so much.

Another thing I loved particularly about Borderlands 2 was how feminist it was. I can not tell you how quickly I lost my shit at Mr. Torgue talking about the friend zone being misogynistic(it is btw). And the repeated jokes about fully murdering men for being rude to women was some of the highlights of my first playthrough. Punching a guy till he explodes because he disrespected a sex worker?? Fucking immaculate.

SPEAKING OF SEX WORK.

Mad Moxxi is a icon. She is a mother of MULTIPLE children, a survivor of rape and assault and a fucking bad bitch who runs a now intergalactic titty bar. Getting to have not only a sex worker be respected in a narrative, Moxxi is fun and a genuinely complex character who isn't defined by her job or her appearance. She is emotional and strong and funny and flawed but amazing person.

And then there's the way the male characters a represented and treated. I'll be honest here, I haven't really played Borderlands 1, mostly because have been spoiled by auto pick up and also I just didn't feel like it. So my idea of most of the men are based entirely off of Bl2, the pre-sequel and Tales. Anyway, Mordecai in particular is a character I really liked upfront. I love how a lot of his motivation and character is driven by his love of animals and Bloodwing. He's kind and though troubled knows when to get his shit together and be there when he needs to be. His casual "are you okay?" After the latter falls in the Arid Nexus was such a nice moment and the way he genuinely tries to be there emotionally for all of the people around him who he cares for is so fucking rare to see in a male character. And his arc of giving up alcohol to focus on being a better bird dad and you getting to help Brick make Mordecai a special gift to celebrate his sobriety is so amazing and I'm so proud of him.

Mr. Torgue is my dad and I love him. As mentioned, he is normal and believes that the friend zone is absolute garbage talk is ICONIC™ and the best scene in that game fight me. Torgue is a crybaby. He is an emotional person who is not afraid to express his pain and hurt when people are mean to him. He respects women and loves unicorns. The fact that is physical appearance is a big muscle guy who screams but is the literal opposite of toxic masculinity will forever make him the best male character of all time and I love him and he is my dad.

Roland was a character that I was never in particularly attached to but I still respect him and did enjoy his presence. I really appreciated his leadership style being primarily based on empathy and logic as opposed to him being a big meanie man with a HUGE dick who yells at people. I always really resonated with the echo from Tannis talking about how she came to Sanctuary. Roland going out of his way to bring Tannis to safety while completely respecting her autism and struggle with socializing really made his death hit harder when Tannis was very obviously distraught by losing him. It really seems that Roland was the only one who didn't treat her differently. And as someone who's autistic, finding people who legit 100% understand and respect you and just let you live the way you want/need to is kinda hard and those are the qualities I'd personally want in a leader.

Angel is also a big spot of affection for me. Handsome Jack being a irrefutably horrible person who Angel flat out says gaslights people and killed her means a lot to me considering 99% of Bad Parent stories end with "I forgive u" getting to see an abusive victim take that narrative and say fuck you was powerful and meant a lot to me coming from my own abusive home life.

There's a lot of other things I love about Borderlands but if I keep going I won't stop lol so let's get into why Borderlands 3 makes me so uncomfortable.

One of the main things that bothered me was the sexism. Its nothing too horrifying but given how feminist bl2 was it was really shocking and a bit hurtful the number of times women are called bitches or made to seem crazy. If you recall I brought up how you punch a man to death for calling a woman a bitch? Yea no, in this game we mock women for having boundaries and opinions because lol she's just a CRAZY BITCH who just needs to stop acting so hysterical am I right guys?

Yea the whole mission with that stupid bear thing and his ex robot girlfriend made me insanely uncomfortable and upset. I kept waiting for the gotcha moment where it says actually this bear guy is a dick and he shouldn't use language like that but no we just,,,,,, are supposed to laugh along. I hate it.

Even though Borderlands 3 is still very much queer, this game introducing 2 new trans characters as well as a whole DLC about a gay marriage and one of the playable characters being a lesbian there was this some shit that bothered me.

The mission where you crash and ruin a lesbian wedding.

That mission made so upset and uncomfortable. I hated how traumatized and hurt Tumorhead was as I murdered her family and wife. I hated how unfulfilling the mission was where PLOT TWIST the lady was actually a spy or whatever. I hate how there's a mission about ruining some poor psycho ladies wedding. I would've much more preferred a mission where Idk Bloodshine asks you to help her kill a spy who's causing problems and then fucking go around Promethea collecting wedding decorations or something. OR MAYBE JUST NOT A MISSION WHERE YOU KILL LESBIANS FOR NO FUCKING REASON.

I'm mad, anyway.

I also hated how Tannis was treated in this game. Under absolutely no circumstance would Doctor Patricia Tannis ever willingly take up a position of leadership. She is a severely autistic woman who gets nose bleeds from talking to people she wouldn't just be like "I'm in charge now pls talk to me!!!" Fuck off. And the joke about her dating a minecart isn't funny. The whole thing with the chairs, though funny in its absurdities was still a very important and powerful moment of character exploration. Tannis is insane. She is traumatized and hurt and in a moment of severe torture, she humanized some inanimate objects to cope. Tannis crying over the echo over Phillip is a heartbreaking moment of true vulnerability. It is also funny, because that's how good dark comedy works. It can be both hysterical and emotionally ruining at the same time. So what exactly does Tannis divorcing a minecart mean? What is this saying about her character? Why is it funny? Because lol lol reference??? Again, fuck off.

I hate how the Calypso twins childhood is handled. Troy implies it was horribly abusive and traumatic. But when we met Typhon whatever, he acts like it wasn't that bad??? He acts like he just didn't buy his kids the latest iPhone and oh no whoopsie now they're evil, my bad guys. It feels super weird and I don't like it.

Speaking of abusive parents. THEY DID MY GIRL ANGEL DIRTY SO BAD. This was literally when I decided I hated this game. Angel being the one who killed her mother and not Jack was fucking horrible. Especially after the literal foreshadowing in borderlands 2 implying he did. The fact that Jack is treated like a fearful man making what he thought was the right decision was insulting. I get that MattPat manipulated the fandom into thing Jack is a uwu bean but fuck you, you're the writers and you should fucking know better. Handsome Jack saw his daughter had power and turned her into a living battery for him to use as he saw fit. He was not scared and he was NOT right. Fuck you and fuck you for framing child abuse as chill and ok if your spooked enough like that. And the mission directly contradicts the echo's in Get To Know Jack. If Angel killed her mom why does she ask Jack where her mommy is when he's putting her in her chambers?? Why is it in the echo Jack is aggressive and forcibly and hurtfully makes her go into her chambers but in the memory, he's quiet and passive about it?? That's literally just flat out bad writing. Also fuck you.

Anyway,

I think that's really all I wanted to say about this topic. Obviously, there are also things that suck about bl3 but I'll try to chill and not make this too long.

I mostly wanted to make this to see if people cared/are bothered by the same things I am. I've seen how some of the fandom treats the more emotional and gay aspects of this franchise(the people throwing a fit over Amara, the friend zone line, not respecting trans peoples pronouns, sexualizing and being gross about Moxxi)

Anyway that's it byeeeeeeeeeeeee

#rant time #i was also gonna post this on reddit but it turns out i don't know how to use that app lol #so i prob wont #but dont worry still got tumblr #anyway #borderlands #borderlands spoilers #borderlands 3 spoilers #borderlands 3 #borderlands 2

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nighttimepixels · 4 years

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night how do u do it, how do u make things so gay but also pan but also hilarious?? WIZARDRY. Seriously though it's great XD it feels really organic with the girls especially. like, not forced, or so fast? slow burn but also just... organic, idk XD kinda makes me wonder what your early gay realization was! if that's okay to ask??? feels like u got ur finger on the pulse of 'oh shit i'm gay',,,

*wheeze*

Thank you so much?? (//▽//)ゞ I dunno about finger on the pulse but I do try X) Especially with the queer content! Like, most of the girls are pan (per usual, excepting Crimson, who is pansexual but mostly finds herself homoromantic, and Blade, who just id’s as a big ol’ lesbian), but I specifically wanted to write their fic from a wlw perspective. So it means a lot to hear that you think so! ♡♡♡

as for my ‘realization’ - sure, I don’t mind, heh. But it’s under a cut since it’s not skeleton-related content so people can easily skip it if they don’t wanna read. ┐(´∀｀)┌

Long story short, I was the total quintessential sapphic ‘ahaha, we’re just best friends! I’m just comfortable in my sexuality! She’s just the prettiest, coolest, hottest- oh no she can dance, oh geez I sure do love when we’re working on theater tech together and I’m up in the lighting booth helping her check the spots and oh wow she sure does look Very Good in Those Lights ahahahah-’

(=▿= ||||)

Big case of falling-in-love-with-your-bestie, basically. She was new to the state, no less, and we listened to Fall Out Boy and the Arctic Monkeys and yes even Smashing Pumpkins together,,, she got a record player when we were 16 and hoo boi the baby gay feelings when we had sleepovers and she put on a record and we ended up dancing on her bed with only the fairy lights on in the room;;; Meanwhile, she totally dated multiple guys over the years. Which, fair!

Anyways, cue her between boyfriends when we’re 16 or so, a month after our first water rave (yes, legit a thing, and yes, I legit was lowkey a raver for a few years haha - water raves were done after-hours in an indoor waterpark). Cue another sleepover, just us, this time we were in a pile of blankets in her dad’s small study (downstairs, vs all the bedrooms at her place which were upstairs - so we didn’t have to be as quiet, a perk as a teenager at 2am).

Cue her admitting that the guy she was into basically alluded to intending to ask her out officially the next week (might’ve been a school dance coming up..? probably something like that)… but her also admitting she’d been “curious” about “what it would be like to kiss a girl, y’know-” she had a friend where she’d lived previously that was into girls, etc… heh, any wlw probably gets the vague ‘oh I have a friend who, yknow-’ when trying to hedge about curiousity.

Aaaanyways… she sure did ask my oblivious self if she could ‘try it’ with me XD and my, extremely dense gay ass, sure did say “oh, okay- I mean, I’m comfortable with my sexuality! So, um, if you want to…”

… comfortable with my sexuality, mmmmmhm. (ಠ_ಠ) legit thought I was straight, just an ally, etc. Yep.

Cue smooch that made my poor gay heart flutter. Talkin’ all the good good gay feels. How soft girls are,,, how nice it was that she smelled nice….. how pretty she looked when her eyelashes fluttered closed with the moonlight from the window of course falling over her profile, how cute it was when her leg bumped mine-

Cue me, post kiss, internally saying “yup!! totally comfortable in my sexuality!!!! ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ “

I never ended up properly confessing to her, btw, but about a year later I finally internally just casually went “oh. huh. shit.” after I got a crush on another girl and couldn’t deny that one as easily XD aaaaand after the aforementioned best-friend-who-was-coincidentally-that-fateful-sleepover-night-my-first-willing-kiss, that same bestie casually invited me to a threesome-makeout with the guy she started dating (who I was acquaintancey-friends with as well). Talk about making that guy’s very confused day when his girlfriend and her best friend took off their shirts after he, looking like he was convinced he was hallucinating, agreed to the situation. Aaaaaaand another threesome makeout with her and a different guy after that boyfriend left for college.

Funny, really, bc looking back it really was a... hm. A loophole, if that makes sense? Basically, I was ‘allowed’ to kiss a girl if it was under the pretense of making a guy’s day.

I mean, still a dangerous game to play, but a loophole in the 2000s nonetheless

I was… a youth……..

And hindsight makes me go “oh gods, yeah, no, I’ve been majorly Not Straight the Whole Time” but shit’s confusing in the best of times, let alone pre-2010s when millenial and older queer folk had the added fun of society being extra dumb-and-or-awful outside of the few carved out Accepting pockets. No judgement if it takes you decades, half your life, whatever. Everyone’s circumstances are different, and I respect the hell outta you and your journey!!

Live your best life, I guess is the moral?? And also go with the flow. But also, if you find yourself kissing someone of a not-’opposite’-gender and thinking “wow I sure am straight, but this happens to be absolutely the best”, maybe consider the… possibilities that you have inclinations towards the delightfully queer end of the spectrum. °˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°

And now I just take that energy and pour it into making queer characters so… Woo!! Smooch a skeleton, hold hands and be soft,, insert to your heart’s content!

#night answers #personal #(the part under the cut anyways?)#tldr i sure did have my first willing kiss as a wlw kiss bc my best friend at the time was 'curious'#XD #oh feel free to comment btw i always love sharing stories w people #you're not alone whatever your experiences are #including if you've known you're queer but never have kissed someone in your preferred demo #or you're on the aro/ace end of the spec #or you're trans and you technically did but not as your gender you id as and feel complicated about it #we're all in this together and i love and support you!!!#(also i have not raved in years for the record jfc i sure was secretly wild in random ways pff)#((the second threesome-makeout was nearly to third base and in the back of my beatup hatchback and closer by nine inch nails played))#(((my gods that sure did happen)))#Anonymous #also i unfortunately have not smooched a girl in.... like 6 or 7 years rip TvTb 's'okay i'm chill about it though #(my bad ex/most recent ex was a guy and that ended several years ago now so)#(i am nowhere near as wild nowadays XD )

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cviperfan · 4 years

Text

Okay so partially motivated by how many references there were in SPoP and largely bc it's been in my backlog for years and I remembered the whole thing got uploaded to youtube a while ago, I finally got around to watching Revolutionary Girl Utena for the first time so time for some hot takes

2 clarify I did see the movie about around 2000 which was my introduction to the series, and I did see like 1 episode back in anime club (over a decade ago now tbh) but for the most part I went into this with only a vague sense of the ending and offhand knowledge of a few of the weird comedy episodes so this was mostly a blind watch

Before getting into #spoilers I will say that this ended up being an easy Top 5 and that it's definitely still worth watching (fair warning for the very frequent rape and incest (and sometimes both)), especially if you've somehow also avoided most of the context of this show like me, and it really is one of the rare Nothing Else Like It kind of show (though it has roots in older shoujo like Rose of Versailles and modern stuff like Revue Starlight have picked up its lede)

Okay spoilers from here on

I really only kinda have vague memories of the more knightly take on Utena from the movie so Series!Utena having this powerful Dumb Jock Energy threw me

Like she's out here invoking the Air Bud Rule from minute one

This bit where Akio is going on about some Important Life Lesson thing and she's just fuckin

crab walking im

what a hero i love her

I have always kinda been more partial to shoujo than shounen bc the sense of like emotional urgency and the heightened exaggerated feelings are just more compelling to me narratively and what Utena does spectacularly is really drive that to fucking 11 and it permeates every aspect of the show

Like the melodrama of it all is so shameless and it's so committed to letting its visuals and music drive the mood and emotional intensity of its stakes that they kind of speak for themselves and demand to be taken on their own terms rather than having clear or rigid interpretations

Like it's kind of a situation of "yes most of what you're seeing ties into the show's bigger themes and characterization but also you can just vibe to the spectacle as well" like even when it's not on the Dueling Arena there's a theatricality underlying everything that pairs perfectly with the spirit of shoujo even as it... not necessarily contradicts it, but challenges it in some ways and also wants to coexist with it?

And I think that's the interesting thing how it wants to tackle some of these arch concepts tied into the genre while also being deeply intertwined with it. Like it really is a Product Of Its Time in so many ways but it also feels somehow timeless and transgressive in others even now?

Like part of me would be interested to see a remake that took into account 23 years of conversation about how much perceptions of gender and sexuality have changed but at the same time would it lose some essential part of itself in that transition? idk potentially

Also lbr a hypothetical remake wouldn't even attempt to revise anything it would just redo it thus making it pointless

So I know this has been a thing that's been brought up before but seeing it play out dang RGU and NGE really are just companion pieces to each other huh

Subverting the themes and narrative arcs of their respective genres, mysterious quiet girl who's directly the key to everything, the ritual of action setpieces rendered as Actual Ritual in the story, banger OP, comphet ruining everyone's lives

Also they really don't have much in common comparatively but I'm definitely seeing pieces of Utena in Kill la Kill too? Particularly how Mako's arc feels like a fleshing out and expansion from the archetype divergence Wakaba got in that one ep (I can't believe klk was the utena/wakaba au fanfic)

Speaking of which damn he is a sleazy bastard and a gross predator but ngl Akio can Get It he and Ragyo are basically the same character and I guess this is just my type apparently???? oops

Like I'm recognizing how like really awful he is but also you really can't blame Utena for crushing on him he is super hot and charming

aside i lost it at the audacity of "well even tho i am a man like twice your age (AT LEAST) and took advantage of the situation and also i am clearly not the type to take no for an answer since you didn't reject me you're basically just as bad as me" bruh

The Black Rose Arc is... interesting bc like it borders on superfluous with how it resolves and yet the introduction of a "monster of the week" type power rangers element specifically built to expand on the secondary cast is a pretty inspired choice

again my primary point of introduction to the series was the movie which is basically a remix of the Student Council arc so when I got to 12 I was like wth are they gonna fill the rest of this with? WELP

What I really like about it is that usually this kind of setup-- the 'character is faced with their dark inner thoughts they shy away from and they become a short-term enemy' deal-- ends with the char in question coming to terms with this and overcoming it to become a better person

but here it's just like... they lose and then they just gotta... sit with that, forever. Like it doesn't really change the status quo of their relationships w/ utena or the others but it does just stick around for them and now the audience knows that about them too. like sometimes you just can't take that shit back.

Utena's relationship to queerness, having heard about it tangentially for years but seeing it play out now is also interesting bc while in the grand scheme it doesn't feel necessarily any more ahead of its time than something like Cardcaptor Sakura there is a casualness to it that's distinct

Like for the most part it's either kind of the tangential fluff that even then was part of shoujo as a standard but then there's also stuff like the Akio/Touga or Touga/Saionji hinting or Kozue's casual pass at Anthy in addition to the maintext Juri/Shiori push-pull and ofc the subtext-but-maintext Utena/Anthy threads

I wanna take a moment to talk about Juri bc of how kind of in the spirit of the show itself it plays things both with and against the grain with her

Like she's a Tragic Lesbian which is nothing new but usually this character type (and Distinctively Lesbian characters in general) in anime/manga tend to be portrayed as being very predatory, invasive and either played for laughs or to repulse the audience, so the degree of empathy RGU shows her in 97 is rare to see even now.

Like there is a "safeness" to her bc of how unattainable Shiori is (though their arc ends in a decidedly ambiguious way), but it doesn't really feel like she's getting the short end of the stick over the more straight-leaning characters bc arguably all of the relationships here are defined by an aspect of chasing the unattainable, echoing Utena's own quixotic search for her Prince, and her choosing to remain closeted feels realistic *especially because* of the surrounding context of how heteronormative the world she exists in is. Like the character is aware of that and is navigating it in a way that feels honest

Speaking of which it's interesting how the reveal of Juri's pining for Shiori in Ep 7 echoes the bigger reveal of Utena/Anthy bc of how it plays up this heterocentric love triangle or at least it seems to be but then the cards are on the table and no that's really not what it is at all, and it feels significant that after spending most of the series naively oblivious to Juri’s feelings and what she wants out of a relationship with Shiori that Utena finally Gets It in Ep 37

Is it a coincidence Juri actually gets to be the one to point it out? No

Speaking of triangles big ups to the Ruka/Juri/Shiori one honestly bc of how hard it commits to the unknown third result of a LT where absolutely no one comes out happy and it actually works even with the handicap of Ruka basically coming out of nowhere just for these two episodes

Like all three of them want the one person who's absolutely never gonna love them back and that's just rough buddy and isn't that kinda the show in a nutshell

So the thing that struck me about Utena/Anthy and how it plays out is how subtle it really is. And that does make sense bc while f/f teasing/subtext again was part of shoujo before it's quite a different thing for the heroine to ultimately reject her 2 male love interests and choose a life with her female best friend, esp in nineteen ninety seven

Like I think you can argue that Ep 12 feels like The Moment where What Their Relationship Is, Definitely shifts and that possibility is suddenly there, and then it doesn't come back in a big way until the ending but there are tiny glimpses throughout where you can see that working in the background if you’re really paying attention

Small things like Anthy's flashes of unspoken jealousy, Utena fretting over her even when she's in bed with Akio, and part of that is coming from going in with a knowledge of what the endgame is and keeping an eye out for it. I can hardly imagine being a viewer during the og broadcast and then ep 34 comes and suddenly the intent is made clear and our understanding of the inciting incident gets all flipped turned upside down

And to a modern viewer I can get coming into this for the first time and being frustrated at just how close to the chest it gets played, but that's also kind of the only way it gets to happen at that point in time? But I think it ultimately is effective and vital to their individual arcs and dovetails nicely with the themes of the show

Like I remember hearing that original manga creator Chiho Saito was pretty against their paired ending, but with a lot of convincing from Ikuhara ultimately came around to it, and it's hard to imagine the anime's ending working any other way and being nearly as impactful

And there is something really beautiful about the bucking against the established idea of yuri relationships being a childish concept that gets left behind in order to 'grow up' actually becoming the impetus of their own journeys into adulthood and eventually back to each other, and it’s hard not to feel a little disappointed that for this Bold Step and declaration for the future that RGU takes that while yuri is more common than ever it largely continues to exist within the realm of schoolgirls and something to be left behind in adolescence like for RGU’s faults and shortcomings it saw this world of possibility in moving forward, while the genre largely elected to stand still

And it really speaks to either the timelessness of the show or how much the queer experience has remained constant that even with a tragic ending, that hope, or rather the promise of their reunion, feels bold and defiant and genuinely uplifting even now

Like the moment where just before they reach out to each other one final time, and their voices as children speak out to each other, as if finally fulfilling a promise they barely remember, I really did just start ugly crying

Lastly some assorted closing thoughts--

-Touga? Punk. Guy really takes advantage of Utena's whole prince thing to manipulate her, ends up losing to her in the rematch and then fucks off to mope for like AN ENTIRE SEASON then pops back up "oh yea im in love with her literally nothing else about my behavior has changed tho" like lmao you tried i guess

-Also i know Touga's design is p stock standard bishounen ojou-sama type but god this is all i can think about when I see him

- Green Touga Saionji is a bitch-ass motherfucker but like he at least tried more than anyone else so uh that's something I guess?????

Like the guy clearly has some unresolved feelings about Touga so i'm inclined to be sympathetic bc wow poor choice my dude but also... bitch-ass motherfucker

-Nanami really went through this thing for me where it's like... she's a brat and a shitty person but it's also hard to really dislike her bc she does get what she deserves most of the time and also she gets kinkshamed more than most of the cast despite none of them really having a high ground over her lol

-Miki did nothing wrong (aside from like the implied incest but that's also like... half the relationships in this show uh)

sidenote I can completely see the notable excess of Incest Subtext/Maintext being intended as like... A Thing to comment on how common it is within shoujo and also tying in to like the bigger themes of Growing Up bc the idea that you’re chasing after your own damn siblings betrays some freudian inability to mature or whatever but tbqh it doesn’t always feel like the show knows the line between commenting on this and indulging in it and RGU is very indulgent by its own nature so I really can’t blame people put off by the show as a whole bc this is an area where RGU is largely indistinguishable from its genre peers

-Juri really did nothing wrong tho also props for having the best duels

-FUCK SHIORI THO for eel

so obviously i have not seen the show up to now but I've been in yuri circles for a long time so I knew about Juri/Shiori and my perception of it had always been "oh it's one of those kinda messy with complicated feelings" kinda ships where the drama is a big part of the appeal and that's true but like

the actual nature of it I did not realize up to now and OH SHIORI'S REALLY THAT BITCH HUH

So not only does she date that one anonymous guy specifically to spite Juri unaware she doesn't actually like him BUT THEN WHEN THEY GET REUNITED SHE'S JUST LIKE LOL IT DIDNT MATTER BUT HEY WE COOL RIGHT *AND THEN* when she finds out about Juri's feelings she's like HELL YEA I CAN HANG THIS OVER HER HEAD FOREVER FUCK HER

***AND THEN*** when she gets some karma after Ruka dumps her ass she airs her dirty laundry out in front of EVERYBODY like Juri hasn't been dealing with this shit like an absolute champ the whole time like?????

Like ok i get that there's the sad longing drama there and usually that's my jam and the show itself seems to end on kind of an ambiguous note and the follow-up manga from this year seems to leave it as kind of a "maybe" but I'm sorry get Juri a better GF 2020 she deserves better

I saw some Juri/Wakaba going through the tumblr tag for the show and honestly that's some big brain shit I'm here for it

Also now knowing exactly how this dynamic operates it really makes that Jasper/Lapis reference pic one of the SU crew drew of them read very.... interestingly???????? (tho Lapis' design reads a lot closer to Kozue and that's probably a closer personality analogue too)

-I love that thing in ep 37 where the whole SC is just very casually like hey utena if the whole revolutionizing the world thing with anthy doesn't work out uhhh call me im free haha just kidding unless...? lmao

-I'm pretty uninclined to try to pin precise sexuality HCs to characters for series this old where the ambiguity is part of how its danced around like partly coming from my own experience I'm inclined to read Utena as bi but that really is just coming from me?

But on the other hand literally every time a guy is like "i love you utena come be happy with me and we can love each other forever" she's like "k" after having left them on read for a day and disconnects from them entirely so lesbian going through comphet is a pretty valid read i think lol

-Lastly I think it’s pretty interesting but validly frustrating how fast and loose the show’s relationship with dream logic and non-traditional storytelling really is like when the shadow girls show up I was like “oh this is a greek chorus thing and it’s meant to reflect on the themes of the episode” (or uh in the case of exactly Ep 29 to break from tradition and explicitly tell us what a characters deal is lmao) but then no actually turns out they’re actually real characters who exist within the show too fuck you

ANYWAY I really did love this show and felt like I got a lot out of it despite it being pretty infamously hard to decipher but the ways it's inscrutable appeal to me specifically so very happy with this I'm gonna be thinking about it for a while

#revolutionary girl utena #cw: rape mention #cw: incest mention #might follow up with some thoughts about the movie later

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