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#Wow i suck at writing angst
cartoon-lovers-world · 2 months
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Thanks for @blorbopostingtime for this idea!
FERAL BRANCH!
LET OUR BOY UNLEASH HIS INNER MONSTERS!
Anyway, I suck at writing angst so you can TOTALLY feel free to add or say anything about this. I accept and appreciate criticism
Enjoyyy!
~~~~~~~~~~~
"Well, an apology isn't going to fix everything…" Branch muttered, taking a step back.
"We know, but-"
"But what?" the youngest stammered, anger slowly replacing his initial fear. "But what?!"
"Branch, calm down-"
"Calm down? Calm down?!" he yelled, not caring if it was Floyd he had interrupted this time. "Do you even have any idea what I've been through?!"
Clay took a deep breath, trying to speak in a gentler tone than his brothers, if that was even possible. "We know we messed up, but we're here now, and we want to make things better."
Branch scoffed. "Now? Now when what? Now when I've managed to battle my own demons? Now when I've found happiness? When I've moved on from Grandma's death? Where were you during all that?"
They froze, racking their brains for a logical justification.
But there was none.
Seeing no response, he went on. "Where were you when I was having a panic attack every single day, blaming myself for Grandma's death?! Where were you, when I was living alone in the wilderness, huh?!" He stomped his foot in frustration, his hands unknowingly clenching and unclenching in fists. "Do you even know what it feels like to be rejected by your OWN people, just because you're different, because you're sad?! Instead of them actually helping you?!"
Poppy hesitated, tears welling up in her eyes as she tried to move towards her boyfriend, to hug him, to comfort him, but something inside her screamed at her to stop. He needed this moment to let it out, and they needed to hear it.
He glared at them with tears in his eyes, feeling a surge of resentment and betrayal. "You abandoned me! You left me alone and I was only a freaking five-year old baby! And now you come back, acting like nothing happened, like you care about me?!" he shouted.
"Branch, we're sorry, we're so sorry-" Clay said, his voice cracking.
"Sorry? Sorry doesn't cut it!" Branch snapped. "Do you have any idea how long I've been waiting for you? How many days have I woke up hoping against hope that you were back?!"
They took a step back, unsure of what to do or say, if there was even something to be said. They messed up, big time.
Floyd's eyes were starting to water, and he managed to mutter, "Branch, we don't want forgiveness, we just want to talk about it-" before his brother stopped him with his sarcastic tone.
"Oh, that's so great, let's talk about why we abandoned our baby brother and never came back, even though we promised, didn't we, Floyd?" he spat. "Was I even on your mind? Because if I was, I'm sure this whole talk wouldn't be happening right now!"
"That's not true, Branch, that's not true!" Floyd protested. "We love you, we've always loved you!"
"Then why did you leave me?" Branch asked, his voice breaking. "Why did you leave me when we could've talked it out? When we could've been a family?!"
They lowered their heads, unable to answer. They had their reasons, but they knew they were not good enough. They had made a mistake, a terrible mistake. And now, it was their turn to handle its consequences.
"Branch, please, listen to us-" Floyd tried again, reaching out his hand.
However, his brother flinched and slapped his hand away, shaking his head. "Don't touch me!"
"Alright, no touching, no touching!" the red-haired troll retreated, holding his hands up. "Just listen to us, please."
"Alright." Branch took a deep breath, letting it out as a frustrated sigh as he pretended to zip his lips. He gave them a sarcastic smile, silently allowing them to stand up for themselves.
Bruce began, seeing no attempt from the others. "We messed up, okay? We know we did. But we love you, we love you so much."
"Yeah, bro, and nothing will change that," John added, his voice shaking slightly as he expected another interruption. But to his surprise, their youngest brother stayed silent.
"We just want a second chance," Floyd chimed, "And we promise, this time, we'll do better."
But Branch had stopped listening long ago. What was the point? He'll trust them, get attached, then bam, they'll leave again. Same old story. Even Floyd, the one who's never broken a promise in his life, broke one promise - his and Branch's promise, and Branch didn't know if he'll ever be able to forget this one.
Everything hurt. His head hurt, his chest tightened, and his limbs were starting to shake. He closed his eyes, trying to pull himself together, but the dull troll was greeted with the room swirling around him in a dizzying manner as soon as he opened his eyes, and his brothers' intertwined voices weren't helping, if anything, they were adding to his headache. He put a hand on his forehead, desperately trying to regain his balance, but the more anyone talked, the more the room swirled. All he wanted was some quiet.
Which was the opposite of what he got when he collapsed to his knees in a heap.
"Branch! Are you okay?"
His girlfriend, as always, he thought, was the first to be by his side, and he felt her hand gently lifting his chin, locking their gazes.
"You okay?"
He nodded, deciding it'd be better if he didn't try to get up in his current state.
"Do you want water, anything?"
He shook his head, and instantly regretted the small gesture as the dizziness that was starting to subside persisted.
"Sure?" He felt her hand squeezing his, as if trying to convey as little reassurance as she could provide at the moment.
He blinked, just now realizing that his brothers were surrounding him, each putting a hand on either his shoulders or back. He took a deep breath, finally managing to his voice, and without thinking, he choked a weak, "Leave…"
"But-"
"Leave!" Branch yelled. He stood up abruptly, and quickly reached out for the nearest piece of furniture to steady himself. Great, now the room was spinning again.
"Branch, you're not okay, at least lie down-"
Branch cut off the pink troll, softer than he did with his brothers as he slurred, "Fine… fine…" His head was pounding, but he didn't care. He turned to the remaining audience with a feeble wave of his hand. "Get out…"
But their bodies wouldn't listen.
"GET OUT!"
They gasped, unconsciously taking steps back but not fully comprehending their youngest brother's words.
Till they hardly dodged the shreds of his wooden table.
"Get out! Leave me alone!"
At this point, Branch was crashing anything that came his way as he paced back and forth, moans and screams escaping his lips and palms pulling at his hair, taking out dark hairs on their way back.
"Leave! Now!" he shouted, not even looking up to face his brothers. "What part of NOW don't you understand?!"
They tried to move, but they couldn't. What happened to the baby of the family?
"Get out of my bunker! Now! Or I'll show you CRAZY!" He screamed, flipping his entire bookshelf and maniacally tearing at his books, a sight that left Clay in a trance-like state.
Poppy was the first one to recover, eyes darting between the shattered furniture and the blood on her boyfriend's hands.
When she said she wanted him to let it out, this was not what she meant, not at all.
Slightly panicking, the Queen took her sister's hand and quickly led her to the elevator, before doing the same with Branch's brothers. Each was holding another one's hand in an attempt to drag him along, though Poppy was already on that mission.
And in a blink, they were gone.
He was alone.
—------------
He was alone.
So why wasn't he calming down? Why was he still screaming?
The bunker, once tidy and organized, was now messy and dusty, debris crumbling down the walls and onto the ground. Why was he doing this? Branch didn't know for sure, all he knew was that his hands were itching.
He wanted to crash something.
He needed to crash something.
He wanted to let it out, but on what, when he's destroyed his own home?
The troll felt a surge of rage as he smashed his belongings. He had spent years building this bunker, treating it like home, like his safe place. But now it felt like a prison. He was alone, just like he had always been, so why did it hurt this time? They didn't really think that after leaving him for over two decades, and then come back, that he would want to join their party with open arms, did they? He didn't need them. He didn't need any of them.
He stormed in and out different rooms through his bunker, looking for something else to break.
But there was nothing. He'd crashed everything.
And that's when he collapsed to the floor, his chest heaving.
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azems-familiar · 1 year
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so i beat dai and trespasser and i am. wrecked. i am not sure i have been hit as hard by the ending of a game... possibly ever?? holy hell. even mass effect, because that gave me a happy ending with a mod. this is just. fuck. anyway, have some screenshots from the ending bit of trespasser:
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kingofbodyrolls · 2 months
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Yoongi fic recs 2024 🥳
In honor of Yoongi’s birthday, I want to share my ultimate favorite Yoongi stories, that I’ve read this past year (2023-2024) 💜 I want to thank each and every writer on this list for creating such wonderful stories and art - you are truly amazing ✨ All the fics on this list hold a dear place in my heart 🥹 🥳
❗Most of these fics are smutty as hell or contains dark themes, so minors dni.❗ 
If you read anything on this list and you like it, please leave a comment to the writer or reblog the fic, it might seem like a tiny gesture, but it really means a lot for writers and I can guarantee it will put a smile on their faces💜 Let’s share and give lots of love!
Looking for more to read? Check ‘The Library’ or last years recs 🙂
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[index] → jan | feb (jhs) | mar (💜) | apr | may | jun | jul | aug | sep (jjk)(knj) | oct (pjm) | nov | dec (kth)(ksj) |
Emoji meaning → angst = 🌩️, smut = 🥵, fluff = 🥰, comedy = 😂, yandere = 😈, thriller/dark = 👻, fantasy = 🪄. 
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⭐Illicit Favors @yoongiofmine // myg x f.reader // producer!yoongi, virgin!reader, f2l // 🥰🥵🌩️
📝 When your editor tells you to re-write the chapters of your book because the sex scenes are weak, suggesting you write them from experience, what do you do when you lack any kind of sexual experiences in general? You go to your friend and ask him for help with it.
🗨️ Matchmaker Namjoon!! The premise is funny and leads to slight awkwardness, but it’s so good. I love the reader and Yoongi’s friendship in this. I was left speechless after reading it, I can’t recommend this enough 🙂
⭐Tricks of the Trade @stutterfly // myg x f.reader // body swap!au, soulmates!au, idiots to lovers, frenemies to lovers // 🥰😂🥵
📝 The convenience store across the street from your apartment carries your favorite energy drink. That’s why you frequent it. It’s definitely not because you have a big fat crush on the owner you’ve been flirting with for the better part of a year. Of course your brand of flirting can also be misconstrued as bickering. When a strange man wanders into the store, he thinks you need a little nudge to embrace the strings connecting you. Next thing you know you’re waking up in a body that definitely doesn’t belong to you. You can’t decide if it’s the best or worst thing that’s ever happened to you.
🗨️ This is utterly perfection! It is so funny and hilarious - but it is also insanely smutty! It’s really interesting with body swapping, what they learn about each other, lol. I read this on a day where I was feeling down, and it honestly made my day! 💜Also, now I kinda wanna watch ‘She’s the Man’ 😂
⭐Backtrack @mapofthesea // myg x pjm x reader // producers!yoonmin, assistant!reader, bi!yoongi // 🥵🥰
📝 There’s no telling just how long you’d been stuck in the windowless studio, and you’re just about ready to walk out and forfeit your paycheck for the week, until your bosses strike up an interesting bargain.
🗨️ Holy fuck 🥵 I feel like I need to take a very long shower now 🫣🫣🫣 this is probably one of the dirtiest fics I’ve read. It’s so good 🤤
⭐Workaholic @hobiwonder [10K] // myg x f.reader // “‘strangers” to lovers (I don’t want to spoil!) // 🥵😂🥰
📝 Yoongi needs to relax and Hoseok has many tricks up his sleeve to make him. None of them Yoongi thought included hiring a hooker to pay him a visit one stormy night. 
🗨️ Wow okay, this was so freaking great! Like, what??? Incredible! A masterpiece! I really really loved it 🥺 everything was so fucking good, their chemistry, the tense build up ugh, so fucking good! 💯 ✨
⭐What the Moon Saw + Stolen Tides @violetsiren90 // myg x f.reader // non-idol!au, f2l // 🥵🥰🌩️
📝 In the words of the great Stevie Nicks, "Time makes you bolder, even children get older, and I'm getting older too."
🗨️ This is just so fucking beautiful. Everything. About. It. Period. 😭 It is emotional, it is young love, and it is tender and loving - like, Yoongi is just so sweet. Their timing sucks, but thankfully Violet wrote a beautiful drabble to give the couple a lovely ending! 💜 Truly, please go read it, it is so good I was crying and felt so good after, it’s sweet – OKAY I’M SOFT I know.
⭐Oh, darling! [series; completed] @yoongiofmine // myg x f.reader // university!au, non idol au, professor!yoongi, student!reader // 🥰🌩️🥵
📝 Starting your second semester at one of South Korea’s most prestigious universities should be stressful enough. Between juggling classes, good grades and a social life, your plate was full. Hoping to spice up your academic career, you thought it was a good idea to enroll as an assistant for your literature professor, whom you’ve held a very secret and very forbidden crush on for the past several months. What will happen now that you’re forced to work closely together? And what if your crush isn’t as one sided as you thought? 
🗨️ Holy fucking shit 🥵🫣😳 This is just one of my favorites series, EVER 💜 This is in my top 10, no questions! ✨
⭐Mami @kithtaehyung // myg x f.reader, knj x f.reader, jhs x f.reader // roommates!au, battle rap!au // 🥵
📝 You somehow have a conversation with Yoongi, and you tell your roommate about a date date.
🗨️ So, so good 🥵 really looking forward to more of this series 🥵 🫣
⭐Damn the Charcuterie Board @bratkook // myg x f.reader x pjm // bestfriends!au, threesome // 🥵
📝 This doesn’t have a summary, so here goes mine; reader has has a sling of unfulfilling sexual times, and in the company of her best friends, she thinks about a video she watched recently. Could they give her what she needed?
🗨️ This has been on my reading list for so freaking long! 🥹 And now I finally got to read it, and damn, it is one of the best, filthiest fics out there. So, so good! 💯🥵
⭐Cotton Candy Computer (1) [series; discontinued] @softyoongiionly // myg x f.reader // hacker!au // 🥵🌩️
📝 Min Yoongi is the top hacker in the world. He has put away countless other cyber criminals all whilst evading detection by virtually everyone he has ever crossed paths with, including the government. The diabolical super hacker that came close to tracking him down is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, all thanks to Yoongi’s handiwork. So what happens when the sentence is shortened unexpectedly? What happens when the biggest threat to public safety is roaming the streets again, determined to get revenge on the man who put him away? What happens when the worlds most infamous hacker just so happens to manage your local Mikrokosmic Electronics? A terabyte of trouble.
🗨️ Shit this was incredibly good!!!! Why isn’t it finished? 😭 I don’t usually read unfinished or discontinued series, but the summary really had me and I just had to read it – and now I’m hooked and I want more of this sexy hot hacker Yoongi! 😭 The story was also just so well written and the chemistry between reader and oc was so fucking perfect, and don’t get me started on the smut, like ugh 🥵 Gosh, I’m so sad there aren’t more parts to it (like the author planned four parts). But it’s so so good, and the cliffhanger isn’t horrible (in terms of wanting to read the next chapter). It can definitely be read as a one shot, I just really, really wished there was more, because, fuck, it was perfect! 💯💜✨
⭐Three Tangerines [series; ongoing] @kithtaehyung // myg x f.reader // fuckboy!yoongi, brother’s best friend!au, age gap!au // 🌩️🥵
📝 Throughout high school, you sometimes caught glimpses of your brother’s older friends: some of them were sweet, some of them were smart. but the one closest to him? that guy was a total f*ckboy from day one. after a foray of horrid relationships spanning years - ending with one that broke up with you for an alarming reason - you needed advice on what the hell you were doing wrong… and this wasn’t a conversation for anyone sweet or smart.
🗨️ I will keep screaming about Ryen and 3tan, yes. And if you have not read it yet, please take 3-7 days off from work or school to do so 😂
⭐Sinful Lust [completed series] @oddinary4bts [71.9K]  // myg x f.reader x jjk // slice of life!au, bisexual boyfriend!yoongi // 🥵🌩️🌩️🌩️
📝 in an attempt to spice up your bedroom life with your boyfriend Min Yoongi, you suggest bringing another man into the action. Yoongi seems reluctant at first, but when you mention his friend Jeon Jungkook, he can’t deny his attraction. All that’s left to do is to convince Jungkook into participating...
🗨️ this one is special to me (as is everything Ella writes honestly). This one is very controversial because of the cheating aspect in it, but it feels so real and it’s very well handled! I love it! It’s very angsty too, made me cry multiple times– I was just so invested in it! I’m really trying not to spoil too much (I already have lol). Just, read it okay??? ✨
⭐F*ck Christmas  @sailoryooons [23.4K] // myg x f.reader // f2l // 🥰🥵
📝 Making hating Christmas your entire personality was never the plan. Then again, it seems bad things only ever happen around Christmas - like discovering your fiancé cheating on you, forcing you to move back to your sleepy hometown. But Min Yoongi happens to love Christmas, and if there is one thing your very stubborn childhood crush is going to do, it’s try to reignite your Christmas spirit. Even if he has to force-feed it to you with gingerbread cookies and too-sweet eggnog. 
🗨️ Gosh, I remember reading this sometime last year and it was perfection - it still is! ✨ It’s so so so fucking good. If you haven’t read it, please do so 🥹 it’s also one of the best Christmasy fics 💜
⭐Eargasm + Eargasm II @lavishedinjimin [9.5K + 14K]  // myg x f.reader // phonesex!au, sexhotline!au // 🥵
📝 the idea of having your first ever orgasm by talking to a hot, random stranger through your phone scares the living hell out of you, but maybe it won’t be as bad as you think.
🗨️ holy fuck, FUCK. this is insane 🥵🥵🥵
⭐Less of Them [ongoing series] @casuallyimagining [9.9K]  // myg x f.reader // established relationship, arranged marriage!au, star-crossed lovers // 🥵🌩️🥰🪄
📝 as the daughter of one of the oldest families in the kingdom, when the king decides that it's you he wishes to marry, you're forced to make a decision and fulfill your duty, leaving behind everything you've ever known--and the only man you've ever loved.
🗨️ PLEASE, PLEASE— FUCKING PLEASE. If you have not read this one yet. Please do it now 😭🥺 It made me cry in the best way possible! The world building, the characters, their love for each other shines to fucking bright and then– [spoiler] READ IT yelling with hands frantically moving above my head
⭐Things that Grow @violetsiren90 [0.9k]  // myg x f.reader // established relationship, idol!au // 🥰🌩️
📝 the idea of having your first ever orgasm by talking to a hot, random stranger through your phone scares the living hell out of you, but maybe it won’t be as bad as you think.
🗨️ it is so fucking beautiful, I can’t even begin to articulate… fuck. I know it’s very short, but dammit I love it. Every single freaking word in this is PERFECTION.
⭐Hard Liquor @chateautae [8k]  // myg x f.reader x jjk // business!au, age!au, executive boss!yoongi x employee!reader // 🥵
📝 your dull evening at a bar becomes hopeful when your mysterious, handsome boss min yoongi shows you the ropes on everything alcohol, but shows you much more when he ends up buried deep inside you.
🗨️ it was SO FUCKING INCREDIBLE like I don’t even know where to begin??? The smut??? That has left me in utter need of Holy Water, because DAMN 🥵 The writing, flow of the story was also just 💯✨
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This is my little corner with my own fics— I don’t write that much (I prefer to read), but it would mean a lot to me if you checked out my work or read it. You don’t have to, it’s up to you of course 🥰
⭐Friendcation [110.5k] // myg x f. reader // roadtrip!au/camping!au, f2bfwb2l, mechanic!Yoongi // 🥵🥰😂
📝going camping with your best friends seemed like a brilliant idea when you initially made the plans. But when you harbor secret feelings for one of them, what will become of you being close confined for three months? Trouble, that’s what.
🗨️ you might laugh, but this is very special to me because it’s the first long fic I wrote and I wrote it because I missed my sister and brother-in-law (they were going on a roadtrip across Europe, lol).
⭐Learn to Love Again [19.4k ] // myg x f. reader // hybrid!au (shapeshifter!yoongi), s2l, slice of life!au // 🌩️👻🥵🥰
📝people always leave. They become beautiful stars shining bright in the night sky. When life hands you lemons, you’ve been told to make lemonade, but that is hard when your soul and heart is breaking apart. When you rescue a tiny cat and meet a handsome stranger in the cafe, you finally feel yourself healing – but when they too leave, how are you going to learn to love again?
🗨️ this one is quite sad, but I really adore it. I wrote it when I was very depressed, so it’s very heavy in that department 🥲
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And as a something little extra, here’s a few fics that I haven’t had the time to read yet, but damn I’m buzzing to get to read them:
Those Eyes Chico [ongoing series] @kookslastbutton
Burden @casuallyimagining
Pour some sugar on me @yoonia
Turbulence [AO3] by orphan_account
Only Yesterday [completed series] @borathae
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Happy birthday to our Lotus flowers, YOONGI!!!! 🥳💜✨
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Note
Best friend Chan who is in love with reader but has a girlfriend?
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𝐒𝐨 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭?
Pairing: bestfriend!Chan x reader college au Genre: Angst (i cant write that for shit.), fluff, smut Word Count: 4.5k (lord help me) Warnings: Chan's gf is controlling, gf is a pick me, mentions of cheating (not by chan), mentions of college (younger half of members + chan gf + reader), fade to black sexual moment kinda >.>, nosey ass friends >.>, mentions of ateez members, not proofread, fighting >.> DO NOT DO IT, lowkey (highkey) cringe... UHH Idk what else...
A/N: I have exams soon so >.> i won't be taking requests until like May 😭 uhh I might get out the requests I have but until May I won't be accepting any very sorry >.>
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You pursed your lips as your best friend's girlfriend, Chaewol, rubbed herself all over your friend, Chan's, arm.
"Chrissy." She said sweetly. "Can we go now?"
Your other friend, Seungmin stared at her, not even trying to hide the look of disgust on his face.
Minho just blinked slowly.
"Babe, we just got here." Chan sighed.
"I know but the waitress keeps giving me dirty looks." She pouted.
Hyunjin, a man who'd grown to be as close as a brother to you, made a face and leaned in close to you whispering, "Maybe if she hadn't been all over Chan as if the waitress wanted to steal him she wouldn't get dirty looks."
You gave your friend a knowing face.
"It's fine Chan." Seungmin smiled, stirring his drink with his straw, "Just go."
Chan looked at you with an apologetic look.
You shrugged. "We'll just try again some other time."
He smiled. "Alright. See you guys." He stood with Chaewol, who gave you the nastiest look as Chan led her out.
"The waitress wasn't even looking." Seungmin pinched the bridge of his nose.
"She's obviously jealous." Hyunjin huffed. "I would be too if my boyfrie-"
Seungmin elbowed him.
You looked between the two confused. "What?"
"Nothing." They both said.
Minho grabbed. a bunch of tissues from the dispenser in the middle of the table and tried forcing Hyunjin to eat them.
You burst into a fit of laughter as a waiter came over with water to help the spluttering Hyunjin.
Your phone buzzed with a notification from Instagram, you opened it and sucked in a breath at the post. It was of Chan and Chaewol at a bubble tea shop, she was kissing his cheek.
Hyunjin looked at your phone and sighed. "It's fine."
You nodded, "Yeah. Say any of you up for barbecue?"
Seungmin smiled, "Let's go."
It was late now, well past midnight, Chaewol was asleep, and Chan lie awake. He sucked in a breath, rolling onto his side and grabbing his phone, he opened Instagram and squeezed his phone. The picture Chaewol had taken earlier had blown up, "he's so sweet" and "you're so lucky" flooded the comments. He kept scrolling and stopped at a post where you were in a shopping cart and Changbin was pushing you, while Jisung was in a separate cart and Hyunjin struggled to push him. He laughed lightly and paused at a post from 30 minutes ago, that would've been 1am, you were at a table with the other guys. Jeongin was out cold on the table and the rest of them looked drunk stupid except for Minho, probably the driver..
Chan felt his heart clench. When was the last time he'd gone out like that with the rest of you.
He tapped your profile and scrolled through your recent posts, baking with Felix, cooking with Minho, gym day with Han and Changbin, movie night with a friend, a guy, he didn't know..
He stared at the image for a moment before swiping to the next, same guy, laying on his back between your legs, head rested on you stomach, your fingers in his hair, all that was visible, his nose and eyes.
Chan whispered softly, "Who the fuck is that."
Chaewol rolled over, murmuring, "What is it?"
"Nothing." Chan said, "Go back to sleep."
Chan looked through the comments,
Hongjoongisworld 1w Wow, so that's where my snacks went.
HWWAAA 1w Lucky.
former stronk man 1w ;-; why wasn't I invited.
and you tagged Sannie..?
Chan tapped the tag and exhaled slowly at all the pictures of a muscular man with a square jaw and pretty face. So this was Sannie. This was the man doing things he should be, Choi San, who goes to an entirely different school from you.
Chan jumped as suddenly his phone was gone. "Chae-"
"He's hot.." She scrolled through San's profile and hummed. Then her face fell.
Chan leaned over looking at his phone, there you were, phone covering half your face as you took the picture, San behind you, his arm wrapped a little too tight around your waist. Chan took his phone from Chaewol and put it down.
"Go to sleep." He huffed, rolling to face away from her.
Chaewol stared at Chan in the darkness for a long moment before pursing her lips. He's not mad that I called that other guy hot. He's made that Y/N is close to him... And she rolled to face away from Chan, biting her pink nails. What could she do to you?
You were drunk, buzzed, completely inebriated. To the extent Minho had to call someone to pry you off the pole outside of the bar. He'd used your phone and called someone you had labeled as Mr Sannie
Mr Sannie turned out to be someone named Choi San, he was a close friend of yours apparently, and you hugged him poking his face and neck as he half carried, half dragged you to his car.
Minho stared at San for a long time. What is Chan even going to say..
In light of your recent Instagram posts and a long call with Minho, Chan decided to leave Chaewol at home and go hang out with you for the first time in a long while. It was fun, running around being stupid with you. You and Chan were eating ice cream in the park when he asked suddenly.
"Who's San?"
You blinked a bit surprised. "He's a friend of mine."
Chan looked at you before looking back at his ice cream. "Just a friend?"
"Of course." You laughed, it trailed off as you realized he was serious. "Chan, San is just my friend."
Chan looked at you and smiled, "Good."
You didn't exactly know how to respond to that. Good why?
Your phone buzzed and you looked at it, there was a message from Yongbok to the group chat your friend group had.
lixie 3:47pm We're having a party off campus, you senior citizens tryna join in?
He Who Feeds Them Tissues 3:47pm I will if Chan will.
OMG SLAY💅🏻 3:48pm Why are we senior citizens...
Chubby Cheeks 3:48pm Because you've already graduated.
Hangry 3:48pm But we're not senior.
OMG SLAY💅🏻 3:48pm Minho and Chan are.
He Who Feeds Them Tissues 3:47pm You haven't eaten tissues in a while have you Hyunjinnie.
Me 3:49pm You're cooked. 💀
Loaf 3:49pm I'll go. Hyunjin hide.
Channie 3:49pm LOLLL
STAAA 3:49pm OMG GRANDPA LEARNED LINGO
lixie 3:50pm 😧 never thought i'd live to see it.
You giggled and looked at Chan who rolled his eyes.
Your phone buzzed again and Chan peeked over your shoulder, tensing at the sight of Sanniepoo..
Mr Sannie 3:50pm There's a party. Go with me?
Chan looked at you, you hadn't clicked the notification, hesitating.
"Are you going to go?" You asked him.
He bit his lip, "I have to ask Chaewol."
You looked down at your phone and tapped Mr Sannie's chat, typing something. "It's fine." You looked at your phone again and stood, "I have to go meet up with a friend."
Chan opened his mouth to say something, that friend was San, this guy he didn't know, who his own girlfriend thought was hot. You were going to meet up with this guy...
"Bye, Channie." You said before he could get any words out.
And you were gone.
You were sitting in class biting your pen and trying to study in art history before the teacher arrived, when you heard the steps then the whispers. You didn't bother looking up until a pink purse was thrown on your textbook.
You knew that purse, you'd helped Chan pick out that purse for...
"You really think you're funny." Chaewol said. Her group of girls dressed as if this were still high school looked at you with disgusted looks.
You looked up at her. "Am I laughing?"
The chatter in the class died.
"Leave my boyfriend alone." She said.
You raised a brow. "You think I'm messing with Chan?"
"Chris. Doesn't want you."
You stood, "What makes you think I want Chan?"
"Why else would you be all over other guys to get his attention?"
The class gasped.
"I've done a lot of stupid shit, but trying to get a guy's attention is not on that list yet." You said glaring at her.
"You're such a liar!" One of her friends said. "We've seen the pics of you with the guys from KQ Uni."
Chaewol got in your face. "Listen here, Y/N, if you don't leave Chan alone, it's going to be and you."
You sucked in a breath, "Back up."
"If I don't?" She asked.
"How old are you, Chaewol?" You asked irritated.
Chaewol smirked and turned, letting her hair extensions hit you as she grabbed her purse.
You pursed your lips.
You hadn't expected to be greeted by San's car outside of school as you left.
He gave you the corniest smirk as you got in, "I have a surprise for you."
You tilted your head, "What is it?"
He held a out a small box covered in blue velvet and you took it, opening the box you smiled at the sight of a plain black ring band. engraved in silver on the inside was "Dumass #1"
You burst out laughing and put the ring on as San held up his right hand, showing his matching band. You two took several pictures before San started driving.
"Hungry?" he asked.
"You know me so well," you smiled.
You took several more stupid pictures and a few pictures of your food, you were going to post the images but then you remembered what Chaewol had said.
"Why else would you be all over other guys to get his attention?"
You shook your head and pressed post.
"We should go meet the guys, they're out and about today." San hummed.
You nodded, "Okay."
You were laying in bed scrolling when Chan called you, you stared at your phone for a moment before answering. "Helloooo?"
"Uh.."
You heard the shakiness in his voice as he spoke.
"Can you come over? I- Chaewol and I aren't talking." He said sniffing.
"Chan what happened?" You sat up in bed, it wasn't the first time something like this happened...
You were at his house in 20 minutes, staring at your friend as he sniffled and allowed you before hugging you. You patted his back and made him sit as he cried about Chaewol cheating on him... again.
"Am I doing something wrong?" He looked up at you with tears in his eyes.
"Of course not Channie." You smoothed his hair and smiled at him gently. "She's the problem."
He muttered something about not being good at anything and lied down on the couch, resting his head on your lap.
You spent most of the night comforting Chan and relaxed when you got him to go to sleep. You stared at your friend's sleeping face, so content and calm as if in his dreams he'd forget about everything. You smiled slightly and leaned back against the couch falling asleep yourself, sure this would be the last time, positive...
When you woke up Chan wasn't laying on your lap and you assumed he'd gotten up to go do something but as you were about to stand you heard the voices by the door...
"Chris, you know it didn't mean anything. I love you babe." Chaewol sobbed.
"Please don't..." You heard Chan sigh.
"Chan!" She sobbed louder, and you heard her fall to the floor, "Babe it won't happen again! I swear! I love you, please!"
He wouldn't... right?
"Chaewol stand up."
"Not until you forgive me." She sniffed.
You exhaled slowly as Chan told her, "Come back later."
"Chrissy please-"
"I'm serious."
"Fine."
You heard the door close then Chan was back in the living room staring at you.
"Y/N-"
"It's fine. Just enjoy yourself." You pursed your lips and rolled your eyes, before leaving him standing there.
Chan's mouth was half open he was going to say something, he willed the words out. But a small, "Thanks for coming over." Left his lips instead and was met with the door slamming.
Chan kissed Chaewol and muttered, "You did so good for me."
Chaewol lay there on the bed trying to catch her breath, after cleaning up, Chan got into bed and Chaewol was already out cold. He rubbed her head gently, then he got a text from Changbin.
Baby Changbin 7:59pm Did you see what Y/N posted?
Chan opened instagram, there was a bunch of posts with you and a bunch of guys he didn't know, there was more with that Choi San... and he scrolled to this afternoon, food, you two being stupid, then.. a picture of your hand and someone else's, someone Chan could assume was San, wearing matching rings.
Chan bit his lip and looked at his jewelry drawer. He'd stopped wearing the necklace that matched yours because Chaewol thought it was "intrusive" and "a physical show of emotional cheating".
That left one thing...
"Baby." Chan shook Chaewol gently.
"Huh?" She groaned.
"There's a party tomorrow," He muttered.
"I know." She opened her eyes a little.
"Can we go?"
"Yeah whatever, let me sleep..."
Chan lie back and stared at the pictures of you and San.
He opened his chat with Changbin.
Me 8:02pm He goes to KQ Uni?
Baby Changbin 8:02pm They all do
Me 8:03pm We're going to that party.
The day of the party Chan pulled up in front of the old college he once attended, where you and Chaewol currently went. He had come on Chaewol's request, so he could take her to buy a new outfit for the party.
He saw you and Jisung and was about to get out of his car to go talk to you but another car pulled up. Chan froze as he got out of the driver's seat and hugged you then began counting on his fingers while making an exaggerated face. Jisung cackled. You rolled your eyes and pushed San's head, he faked a hurt expression and opened the front passenger side door for you.
Chan squeezed the wheel and this time got out of the his car, he would've approached but the sound of a squeal made him look away from you, Chaewol and her friends came over and she threw herself on him.
She looked in your direction, then made a face, "That's the guy from KQ Uni isn't it?"
Chan didn't answer, eyes glued on the way you and San went back and forth before you finally got into the car and Jisung got in the back seat.
Chaewol shook him slightly. "Chris?"
Chan's eyes met San's as he closed the door. All the man did was smile before getting into his car and driving away taking you with him.
Chaewol squeezed Chan's arm. "Is something wrong?"
"Not at all." Chan lied, "Let's go, hm? Gotta make you look even more beautiful."
Chan pulled up to the party with Chaewol and her friends. He got out and opened the door for Chaewol, who quickly scampered to join her other friends. Chan shook his head and started looking around for his friends, then he saw Minho, there was a group of guys with him, Chan could only recognize San.
He approached and San smiled at him, Minho patted Chan on the shoulder and introduced him to the rest of the men. "This is my good friend Chan. Channie, this is San, Seonghwa and Yunho."
Chan nodded and smiled, "Have you seen Y/n?"
"Oh, she ran off with Seungmin somewhere." Minho said. "Probably to get drinks."
"Oh, okay."
San raised a brow at Chan, "You know Y/N?"
"She's my friend from high school." Chan said.
Seonghwa looked between the two sensing the tension and laughed nervously, "I'm going to go.. get us some drinks? Yunho come with me." Seonghwa grabbed Yunho and dragged him away.
MInho stared at the two in shock, "Hey, hey, hey. It's a party, don't look so aggressive.."
San nodded, "Of course."
A moment later, you and Seungmin came bouncing back giggling like little children. Seungmin grabbed Minho, "Hyunjin wants to dance with you." And he dragged him away.
Chan smiled at you. You gave him a hug and poked his nose, "Didn't think you'd make it."
"I'm here." Chan shrugged.
San's mouth fell open dramatically and he made a face at you. "Am I invisible???"
You gave him a side eye. "I saw you earlier."
San clutched his chest, "So cruel..." he faked tears then the two of you started laughing.
Chan felt a tug on his arm, he looked at Chaewol.
"Oh," She looked at you and San.
San looked past you at Chaewol and you turned, pursing your lips ina. tight smile.
"Hi," Chaewol smiled at you and then looked at San, "I'm Chaewol."
"San," He nodded before looking right at Chan as if asking with his eyes So you have a girlfriend... San smiled at you and grabbed you, "Y/N we should dance."
Chan was about to say something but Chaewol pulled him away, "Babe we should go get some drinks."
Chan wanted to pull away he wanted to say no but then.
"Christopher."
He looked at Chaewol and smiled, "Ok."
As the party neared its end, Chan didn't know where Chaewol was, but he was too drunk to wonder. Minho had found him half passed out on the couch and helped him up. Minho helped Chan walk and eventually found you, talking to San's friend Seonghwa.
"He's too buzzed yo drive and Chaewol is no where to be seen." Minho said before carefully passing Chan's weight to you.
You stumbled slightly and somehow managed to support him. Seonghwa helped you before you fell over, you carried Chan to Seonghwa's car and tossed him in the back seat.
Seonghwa drove you to Chan's house and parked before asking, "Are you okay to carry him in alone?"
"Of course, I've got him." You laughed, and woke up a half asleep Chan in the backseat before helping him walk to his front door and convincing him after a bit of bickering to open the door. he trudged into the house and flopped face first onto the couch.
You laughed and he looked at you.
"Are you going?" he asked quietly.
You stopped laughing and nodded.
"Why...?"
"Because I have to go home, Chaewol wouldn't like seeing me here." You said.
Chan sat up and looked at you, "Please don't go."
You stared at him, "Chan-"
Before you could protest he hugged your waist and buried his face in your belly. "Please.
You stood between staring down into his eyes as he looked up at you. "I can't... Chaewol might get angry."
Chan's grip on your relaxed for a brief second. Then it tightened again and he whispered, "I don't care... Please... Stay. I need you to stay."
"You're drunk." You shook your head and started pry yourself away from Chan but he held you tighter.
"Would you be mad at me if I told you I liked you?" He muttered.
"No." You said quietly. "I'd ask you why."
"And if I said I love you?"
You stared at Chan. "You're not thinking straight." You started to pull away but he squeezed you for a moment.
"I don't need to think." He stood up and smiled gently at you, "It feels better if I'm with you." He hugged you completely against him and rested his head on your shoulder.
"Chan I-"
"Don't push me away right now... I might cry if you do." He breathed.
You held him as his body relaxed against yours. And the door opened.
You weren't sure what happened between the door opening and where you were now. What you did know was that you were going to beat the crap out of the person pulling your hair.
Chaewol pulled your hair and screamed at you as her friend tried pulling her back. It was a mess of punches and scratches and hair-pulling. "Boyfriend stealing, home-wrecking BITCH!" Chaewol screamed as she pulled your hair.
"You're the one who can't keep your legs closed!" You shouted, swinging at her.
"Don't come back here! Keep your hands off Chris!" She shouted as Chan pulled you off her and she kicked at you still gripping your hair.
You grasped on her hair as well and pulled out her hair extensions. "You fucked your relationship over yourself! You cheater! You ugly, ungrateful- OOOH!" You threw her extensions in her face as Chan picked you up around the waist and carried you out the door.
"Christopher! Get back here! Bring her back right now!" Chaewol shouted as her friend tried calming her down.
You were trying to get away from Chan as he dumped you on the ground and held you so you wouldn't run back to keep fighting.
"Chan are you even living?!" You shouted. "Howw do you let her treat you like that! It's your house, your money, your LIFE!" You pulled away from him and started walking away.
He grabbed your hand and pulled you back hugging you tightly. "Please." he muttered. "I love you."
You stared blankly for a moment. "Huh?"
"I need you." He pulled back and looked at you.
"You're probably just in shock and drunk."
He shook his head slowly, "I'm tired. I'm tired of fighting and screaming and everything.." He leaned down and pressed his forehead against yours. "Please."
And you didn't stop him as he kissed you.
Chaewol was faking tears the following monday in class and everyone was running to her to console her. Except you.
"Chaewol don't cry." Someone said rubbing her shoulder. "What happened?"
"I went home after the p-party. And Ch-Chan and Y/N were all over each other," She sobbed.
The whole class shot you dirty looks, you kept about your business staring at your text book.
"A-And then..." She snuffed. "We had a fight and Chan carried her out." She sobbed dramatically.
You made no move of any kind when some girls came up to you asking if it was true.
"IT GETS WORSE!" Chaewol shrieked. "THAT HOMEWRECKER KISSED HIM OUTSIDE TOO!"
You closed your textbook and got up from your seat, going to leave. As you stepped out of the building Chaewol's friends flocked behind you.
What you hadn't anticipated to see outside was Chan, he leaned against his car looking at his phone. Looking up at the sight of you and the other girls.
"Where's Chaewol?" he asked.
"She's inside crying over your sorry ass." One of her friends spat.
Chan opened his car and pulled out three pink suitcases and set it on the side walk. "Tell her to come get her stuff. If I missed anything she can come get it herself."
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Chaewol's voice came from the front entrance and you turned to see her running out and down the steps where she grabbed Chan. "Chris! Chrissy! Baby! Honey!"
Chan pulled his hand away from hers.
"WHY?!" She screamed, other students were looking through class windows or from where they were walking.
"I'm tired. I'm so tired." Chan said simply and grabbed your hand.
You gasped as he put you in the car. "Chan-" You started as Chaewol tried to open your door.
"Let them try." He said locking the doors and looking at you. "I want to talk to you."
When you were a sophmore in high school and Chan was a senior, you became fast friends. Not that Chan wanted to be your friend, really, he had been hoping to get your number and possible convince you to date him. But he'd failed miserably as Minho told him countless times before.
You'd have been lying if you had said you weren't into him, he was sweet and funny and gorgeous. But when he went to JYPU, he met a girl from another school, she was sweet at first, but when they started dating things didn't work out well. At least for Chan. The first time he'd called you crying saying that he and Chaewol had fought you thought it was normal. But the more it happened, the less normal it seemed to you...
And then he didn't speak to you for months on end... because Chaewol said he couldn't.... Becuase Chaewol didn't trust you.
And when she'd cheated and you suggested breaking up, it wasn't even a day before he'd forgiven her. And you couldn't help but wonder why. Why you were in this car staring at your hands? Why you let him drag you out? Why you let him kiss you?
Chan whispered quietly. "I talked to San."
You looked at him.
"I'm sorry."
"It's not you fau-"
"It is." He rested his head on the steering wheel. "I let Chaewol take over my life, and every time she lied and betrayed and and promised it wouldn't happen again it did... and I let it happen." he sat up and turned to you. "I'm sorry."
You sucked in my breath. "You shouldn't apologize. You couldn't have known better.."
"But I did know better." He looked at you. "I've known better- No, I knew you were better. I just.. I was scared you didn't want me back. Let me tell you when I'm sober. While you'll listen.."
"Channie." You stared at him.
He leaned in. "Can I.." he said quietly.
You nodded slowly and Chan leaned into you, his soft breath against your lips before he kissed you gently. He pulled away and whispered. "I love you."
You looked into his eyes. "I love you too..."
Your phone buzzed in your bag for god knows what time. Chan's lips were on your neck, you whined as he sucked a dark mark to the skin.
You moaned as he rutted against you. Rubbing his tented crotch against your clothed pussy. He pressed his thumb to your lip, "Suck." He muttered.
You opened your mouth and sucked on his thumb obediently. He groaned and pulled your shirt over your head. Chan kissed down your chest and removed your bra before moving lower and pulling off your pants. He kissed your thighs and smiled at the wet spot on your pantie. "This for me?"
He pulled your pantie off and licked a big strip of your pussy and moaned into you. You grabbed his hair.
"This is mine. You hear?" He looked up at you, coffee colored eyes dark and pupils blown wide. "This pussy is mine."
You whimpered and nodded.
"Good girl." He whispered before shoving his tongue into you.
You squealed.
"And the rest was..." You smiled to yourself blushing deeply.
"So then what?" Seonghwa asked as he sipped his coffee.
"You horny little-." San slapped him.
You rolled your eyes and smiled as your phone buzzed with a message from Chan.
Channie🥰 2:14pm I wanna take you out, text me when you get home.
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allfearstofallto · 1 month
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Wow I loved your latest child piece, do you think he would try desperately to make his sons like him? Give them gifts and go fishing together with his oldest son? I mean he can see that the kid is terrified of him but he tries to reassure him but to no avail. I think he would let his anger out on some of his poor Fatui men or on his missions whenever these moments happen to him. That’s so angsty how Childe loves his family but they only see him as the monster they think he is.
Y'all I actually really do like writing for yandere Childe's family!! The angst is so fucking good!!
But since I can't keep up with the nameless kids, the older boy is Adonis and the younger one is Damon
Yandere! Childe x Fem! Reader
Forced Marriage AU
TW: Yandere Themes, Reader has children, mentions of previous abuse
“You look so cute all bundled up like that, my sweet,” you praised your older son, even patting his head and squeezing his cheeks the way you knew he liked. Yet nothing you were doing could lift the dark cloud that was over him, the fear in his eyes was paralyzing and he was gripping the hem of your dress so tightly, you thought he'd rip it if he were made to let go.
“P-pl-please don't send me away, mommy,” Little Adonis whimpered through tears and you felt your heart shatter. Orange hair framing his face, you brushed it to the side. You hated just how much they looked like their father, his genes so strong they were like little carbon copies of him. And their cries always tugged at your heart, you hated that he made you feel empathy for his face
With your other son still on your hip, you tried to comfort both boys. Finding it difficult to soothe with your hands full. Adonis had gone from whimpering and labored breaths to full blown sobbing at this point, wiping the tears from his chubby cheeks with the backs of his mittens. You tried to stop him from crying, tried to get him to calm down. When the older one cried, so did the younger, and soon Damon was also in your arms shedding tears.
“Your father just wants to take you out for a bit,” your voice was shaky as you tried to reassure him, “You won't even be far. The pond is only a short walk away.” Your words fell on deaf ears as they continued to cry, both of them getting your dress wet with their fat tears.
“What's all the commotion?” The voice that asked this question somehow managed to make both of your children suck their tears up quickly and fall into an almost scary silence. They peaked up at you, waiting for your response to Ajax, who was giving you his usual charming smile.
“I- I just don't think Adonis is very fond of the snow,” you spoke quickly while patting the boy's head, even cupping his cheeks to try and wipe away some of the wetness from his face.
If Childe noticed how tense the entire family has become at his presence he didn't speak on it. Instead he took a knee right in front of his son, also reaching up to pat the boy's head, but he flinched away from his father's touch. You squeezed his shoulder a bit too tightly to hold him in place, making him look up at you in a way that broke your heart. He felt as if you were betraying him, but you knew better, what Childe could do to him was much much worse.
“That's nonsense. He's from Snezhnaya, he should love the snow,” he finally got to pet Adonis’ head. His large hand that was covered in scars and callous practically getting lost in the orange locks.
“Maybe he takes more after me,” you took Childe's hand, trying to put his attention more on you instead, “It doesn't even get cold in Liyue. You remember how much I hated it here when I first arrived, don't you?”
His eyes went dark for a moment as he squeezed your hand a little too tightly, “You hated it here for a lot of reasons.”
“But the cold was the worst part,”
“Adonis will be fine,” he spoke while placing a kiss upon your lips, then one on Damon's forehead, “My father took me ice fishing when I was practically an infant.”
“I-i suppose,” words muttered with your head down.
The two of them slipped on their boots together, with Childe even helping his son tie his. You felt on edge watching the both of them leave out the door. It was the first time that you'd ever left Childe alone with him, and the instinct inside of you that was telling you to protect them was on high alert. There was nothing you feared more than your husband.
But nothing could be done. Childe kissed you again on the lips and you pressed your forehead to your sons, quietly whispering words of assurance to him and most of all Please be good.
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star-girl69 · 4 months
Text
Fade Into You
Clarisse La Rue x Fem!AphroditeCabin!Reader
—-
sypnosis: you fell first, but clarisse fell harder. requested by anonymous!
a/n: decided to feed y’all today….. two fics i’m a monster that just creates and creates. this was so funny bc i kept accidentally writing angst and i had to stop myself. they’re allowed to have crushes on each other. it’s ok. this was hard anyways i hope you all enjoy!!
Fade Into You - Mazzy Star
warnings: just so cutesy, swearing, mentions of violence, mentions of blood and injury, soft clarisse i looooovvvvveeeeee you, tell me if i missed anything!!
—-
Your chest heaves. You’ve never ran that fast or that far before in your life. Your satyr protector runs ahead to get the healers, and you crash against some random building- a tool shed, maybe?
You groan, crouching down to clutch at your lower leg sporting a large gash running blood. You don’t remember how it happened. Maybe it was when you fell? You could have sliced it open on an unfortunately sharp stick.
You don’t even want to think about the fact that the stupid monster thing chasing you could have gotten close enough to claw at you.
“Hey, hey,” someone says, crouching down next to you. She’s wearing an orange shirt. Her hair is curly, her eyes are pretty and brown, and oxygen isn’t getting to your brain so she kind of seems like an angel. “Oh, wow,” she mutters, looking at your leg. “One second, ‘kay?”
“Wait,” you say, grabbing onto her forearm. She looks up at you.
“I’m going two steps away, dummy.” She laughs, and you’ll remember that sound for the rest of your life.
She leaves you, and you almost want to cry because you feel so alone. You’ve just been told you’re a demigod, then you were forced to run through the woods, your heart is still hammering and your leg fucking burns.
But she was right. It was only two steps, and she comes back, the door of what must be some sort of storage shutting behind her.
She leans back down and presses a towel against your gash.
You hiss.
“Sorry,”
“You’re not.” She laughs again. More beautiful music in your ears.
“I’m not,” she agrees.
You fall into silence, it’s so dark out, but you can see everything about her so clearly.
“You can stop breathing so heavily,” she whispers, the shouting of your satyr protector getting closer, along with what must be the healers. “Camp Half-Blood is surrounded by a magical barrier. You’re safe here. Well, at least, no monsters are gonna get you.
“O-okay,” you mumble. You aren’t sure if you believe her. You don’t think you believe anything anymore.
The healers push her away, you’re so so tired, and she stands up, dusting off her hands.
“Thank you, Clarisse,” one of the healers says. “We’ll take it from here.”
Clarisse.
—-
The purpose of Clarisse La Rue’s entire existence seems to be to drive you insane.
The way her arms flex when she wields her spear, the way she lifts her shirt up to dab at sweat on her brow; and the way you can see her toned stomach and the faintest hint of abs you would actually kill to touch. The way she smiles, even though it’s never really genuine, and the way she laughs when she’s making fun of someone.
She was the first person you met at camp, and you’re pretty sure she doesn’t even remember it, yet alone know your name.
It was ironic, as the daughter of Aphrodite, to be quietly pining over someone from the distance. And it sucked, but maybe you would just always have this quiet crush on Clarisse, and you learned to take it like you took your breakfast.
Until the start of this summer, when everyone came back to camp, it was alive again, and it all changed. And now you’re fucked.
—-
You smile, watching a few of the younger campers scream about how amazing the lake is. Summer’s just started. It’s so beautiful this time of year. They didn’t have as traumatic experiences as you, no monsters chased them right up to the barrier of camp. The lake is huge and so blue it seems otherworldly- probably because it is.
You slam into something.
It’s an awkward flare of limbs and muttered obscenities, but you manage to keep yourself upright by falling back into a very convenient tree.
“Sorry,” you say, looking up and expecting to make eye contact with anyone but her.
You haven’t been face to face with Clarisse in four years. You mouth snaps shut, and you’re sure you look like a terrified deer in headlights.
She’s frozen just like you.
“W-watch where you’re going,” she hisses, pushing you farther into the tree as she walks past you.
Did Clarisse just stutter?
—-
Clarisse stares at you.
You blush like you’re about to turn into a flamingo.
The cycle repeats.
—-
This year, the Ares and Aphrodite cabins were paired together to share the field for sword practice just before dinner. The sun is hidden by the trees, providing some nice shade as you frown at all the Ares kids sparring like their lives depend on it.
While Aphrodite kids are not the most naturally skilled in fighting, you’re still demigods, and you still have to know how to protect yourselves.
Matty, a Ares child and your sister Tyla’s boyfriend, already sparred three times, winning against his siblings, then sparred with Tyla once; which just ended with her getting bored after a minute and dropping her sword before jumping into his arms.
You watch random people spar. Everyone moves around you, Tyla and Matty are on top of each other next to you on the bench, everyone walks around you to collect their water bottles from the table behind you.
“Aren’t you gonna spar, Y/N?” Tyla asks, fiddling with Matty’s hands.
“No,” you laugh.
“That’s against the rules.”
You know that voice, you hear that annoyingly angelic voice in your dreams.
Clarisse sits down next to you. You can hear Tyla smiling. Only a few of your siblings who can be trusted to keep a secret know about your wretched crush. You’re probably blushing.
“Uh, what?” you say, looking in her direction but not risking actually looking at her.
“You have to spar,” she says, like it’s painfully obvious, kicking out her legs.
“I’ll do it tomorrow,” you shrug.
“Sounds like you’re scared, Y/N,” Matty muses.
You shoot him a bored look. “Sounds like you’re whipped, Matty.”
Tyla is currently in Matty’s lap, her hands in his hair.
“Oh, definitely,” he says, turning towards Tyla with a sweet smile on his face and she coos and immediately attaches her face to his.
“Oh, Gods,” you mutter, turning away from the two of them having borderline sex on the bench.
Clarisse laughs.
You clench your fist, you feel like you’re gonna explode being so close to her and not able to climb up into her lap and kiss her like a woman starved.
“You still have to spar, you know.”
“Are you going to tell on me?”
“Hm, no. I won’t have to.”
You finally look towards her, if only because you’re confused, but she’s looking straight out at the the distance, where a certain centaur is making his way to the fields-
“Oh, fuck,” you hiss, immediately jumping up and scrambling for a sword from the pile behind you.
You turn around, hoping one of your siblings is free so you can spar with them-
The sword is ripped out of your hands.
“That one sucks,” Clarisse says, simply, while you stand there with your mouth open. She rifles through the swords. “Use this one instead.”
The one she hands you does seem a lot easier to hold. Not too heavy, not too light.
How the hell could she tell which one is best for you just by looking at you?
“Matty,” Clarisse says. “Chiron’s coming.”
Tyla and Matty both hop up, giggling at they make their way towards one of the marked circles.
As you’re left there with Clarisse, it suddenly hits you that after four years of simple indifference, she’s talking to you like she knows you. Or like she wants to know you.
You like her too much to question it. You want her too much to be bothered as to why she’s giving you five minutes of her time.
Clarisse walks away. You thought it was going to happen, so your heart feels this sort of heavy that is indescribable, but she turns around.
“Are you coming?” she asks, deadpan.
“Oh. Uh, yeah,” you say, sticking your sword under your arm and cracking your knuckles. With Chiron showing up, she leads you to the marked circle all the way at the edge of the field, the start of the woods, the very last one.
She stops and turns around, this sort of nonchalant but smug look on her face. She reaches forward and bats your hands away from each other with a single swat that leaves you so shocked from the feeling of her skin on hers that your hands fall to your sides.
“Stop that. You’ll hurt ‘em.”
Here, right in front of the trees, the sun shining through the gaps shines off of Clarisse’s tan skin and her bronze armor in a way that makes her look otherworldly.
Clarisse’s that kind of pretty where you just never want to stop staring at her. The kind of pretty where you just want to fade into her and be next to her; the kind of pretty where nothing compares to her but it just watches her too.
Like the sun behind her, it isn’t jealous, it just admires her and shines off her skin.
She’s smirking at you, her knees bending into an offensive position, her spear pointing at you.
“He’s watching,” she taunts, and you’re really not in the mood for a lecture and the loss of dessert privileges, so you copy her.
“I’m not the best-”
She spins forward, spear arcing toward you. You yelp, raising your sword up to block her spear. They slam together.
“You’ll do fine,” she smiles, so smug in a way that makes you want to slap her and kiss her all at once.
“Whatever,” you mumble as she pulls back.
But you feel a little more confident with her praise, launching a surprise attack. She seems a little shocked, but she blocks it, probably a bit closer than normal.
“Feisty,” she murmurs.
“What the hell does that even mean?”
She launches her own attack, more force behind it this time, and it’s harder to stop her, but you do, you push her back.
“It means you’re exactly like I thought you were.”
You frown, because what is she even saying, but she launches another attack, smiling brightly as you block it, her eyes never leaving your form.
It’s a blurry of your heartbeat in your ears, her smile, the clash of her spear and your sword, the rest of the field coming to life with the sound of metal on metal, wins and losses.
Your arm is growing heavy.
But you keep your eyes open, blocking her attacks and waiting for an opening you’re not sure will ever come.
Finally, she reveals her side, and you swing, your sword clanging as it hits her metal armor.
She looks down at your sword and then you.
When she looks up again, it’s never the same.
—-
“Did you let me win that first day?”
You’re in the woods with her, so many months after that first day, and it all still feels like it was yesterday. You’re laying on a blanket on the soft grass, facing each other, limbs tangled together and her arm around you.
“Hm?” she says, slightly sleepy.
“When we sparred?”
“Oh,” she smiles, yawns. “Yeah, I let you win.”
You gasp and hit her arm.
“Clar, that’s, like, horrible. Our relationship was built on lies.”
You’re the only person allowed to call her that.
She frowns. “It wasn’t. What are you talking about?”
“I was gloating over you for months, and you let me-”
“Okay, but, you still won. I just helped you a bit. That’s what a good girlfriend should do.”
“You were not my girlfriend then.”
“Yeah, but you wanted me to be. For how long? Four years?”
You roll yours eyes. “You bumped into me once and then became obsessed with me.”
She smiles against you as she kisses your forehead.
“Who wouldn’t?” she snorts. “Not my fault you bumped into me in a way no one else ever has, angel.”
“My love language is just bumping into people, I think.”
“Then you can’t bump into anybody but me. Or else I’d kill them, probably.”
“A true romantic.”
She wraps her arms around you, muscles flexing as she pulls you on top of her.
“Only for you, angel,” she says, eyes falling closed again. “‘M cold, be my blanket.”
“Aren’t you supposed to be all rough and tough?”
“Can’t be with you,” she yawns. “Love you too much. Now shush. I’m gonna fall asleep.”
“You big baby,” you mumble. “Big bad Clarisse needs to fall asleep with her girlfriend and get her full eight hours or else she’ll go on a rampage.”
“Damn right.”
Clarisse is the type of pretty that just makes you wanna fade into her. And you do, in the light of the rising moon, the light of the fading sun. You fade into her.
—-
y/n when clarisse helps her on her first day: wow, an angel 😍😍
clarisse when y/n bumps into her: wow, an angel 😍😍
ALSO CLARISSE CALLING Y/N ANGEL???? I THINK I’VE FOUND MY NEW OBSESSION Y’ALL
—-
taglist:
@lvrue @t-wylia @laughingcheese037 @kroumi @urdeadpoet @colezb @rey26 @harmzilla @elliewilliamsbae @amberfreemansburntface @kyuupidwrites @neverwaakeme-up @shark1008 @liballer @heyimadison @nvirskies
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on-my-vigilante-sht · 11 months
Text
Sorry to Meet You
Carlisle Cullen x Reader
Summary: The moral dilemma of the patriarch of the Cullen clan finally meeting his mate after 350 years. 
Warnings: Angst, death, blood, accident, surgery, not beta’d, turning, grief
Word Count: 5.8k (sorry, I got a little carried away and I’m getting used to writing one shots again)
Masterlist
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I rounded the corner within the halls of my father’s hospital, heading towards his oh so familiar office. I  had spent a good portion of my childhood playing in the office halls of the hospital so as to not get in the way of an emergency. Every take your child to work day, every early dismissal, random day off from school, and every weekend he had to work and couldn’t find someone to watch me, he brought me here up until I was about 12.
Now I was in college, studying biology as a pre-med student at Johns Hopkins University. But today I was returning to Forks for my summer vacation in between my freshman and sophomore year. He was supposed to pick me up from the airport tomorrow but I had wanted to surprise him at work so I left a day early.
Reaching the door to his office, I entered. Embarrassingly, I had been so eager I hadn’t even checked if he was busy. As the door swung open I was met with the golden hair and eyes of the most gorgeous man I had ever seen. Given his youth I assumed he was a student or a resident but one look at his badge told me he was an attending.
“Y/N? What are you doing here?” my father’s voice broke me from my trance.
“Hi!” I smiled at my father, ripping myself from the mystery man’s enchanting gaze. “I wanted to surprise you,” I explained, returning his hug. “I was so excited I didn’t even consider that you were busy. Sorry,” I apologized to both men.
“Don’t be,” the blond said in an almost melodic voice. “Trust me I understand the importance of family.”
“Yeah Dr. Cullen’s kids are here all the time,” my father laughed.
‘This guy has kids?’ I thought. ‘Plural? He looks no older than 25.’
Seemingly reading the confusion on my face he explained. “Adopted kids. My sister and I were foster kids so we always agreed we’d adopt as many as possible. So far we’ve adopted five teenagers, hoping to give them a new shot at life.”
“Wow,” was all I said, unsure of how to react. ‘Well this guy was definitely out,’ I noted to myself. ‘Not only is he your father’s colleague, he had five teenagers.’ “Well I should let you get back to it,” I said shyly, already backing out of my father’s office, embarrassed. “I’ll be at the house and we’ll get dinner after?” I suggested to my father.
“Sounds good. See you later sweetie,” he called after me.
~
Carlisle tried his hardest to focus on Dr. L/N’s words but he couldn’t, he was so focused on his colleague’s daughter. When she entered the office he had sucked in a breath he didn’t need. He had heard that some mate connections hit you like a brick but he hadn’t seen it with anyone except presumably between Rosalie and Emmett when she demanded he save him.
So as soon as he was done with his meeting he hopped into his Mercedes and headed towards Dr. L/N’s house. Once he reached it he found no cars in the driveway or any indication that there had been a car there recently, only wet footprints leading up to the porch and inside the door, presumably from Y/N getting out of a cab.
Continuing past the house he parked about half a mile away before running back to the house, a feat that only took him a couple seconds.
Taking a page from Edward’s book he began creeping along the side of the house, trying to spot Y/N through a window. But when he couldn’t find her he was forced to climb up some trees until he found her in what was presumably her bedroom, unpacking a suitcase full of clothes.
He watched, admiring the girl as she sorted through the clothes, tossing some in the laundry bin and others in piles to be sorted in the closet. He realized that he could watch her all day, admiring the quirks of her expression as she reacted to different situations. He hadn’t understood the other Cullens’ obsessions with each other until now.
He continued to watch for hours. His eyes sometimes drifting to the delicate curves of her body but always scolding himself for thinking of her like that given that she didn’t even really know him. But a small part of his mind whispered that she’d be his one day.
He only left when he heard her father’s car approaching, swearing to come back to learn more about her so he could strike up a conversation about her favorite things the next time they “accidentally” ran into each other.
~
The next time I visited the hospital wasn’t just to visit my father, it was because I had managed to slip in a puddle, earning myself a gash on the forehead.
I was sat in the waiting room going on two hours with a blood soaked rag pressed to my forehead. I truly didn’t mind waiting seeing as I knew there were far more injured people getting treated. But as I continued to wait I started to get more and more light headed. I began to make my way to the desk in hopes they could give me some answers when I got a head rush, stumbling into a very cold, hard chest.
“Y/N?” I heard the melodic voice again. This time dripping with concern. “What happened?”
“Oh nothing,” I dismissed, reluctantly pulling away from the grasp he had on my arms. “Just slipped in a puddle and my head kind of ate it,” I chuckled.
“How long have you been here?” he asked, more concern ebbing into his voice.
“I don’t know about two hours?” I shrugged, trying to not make a big deal of it. “Please don’t tell my dad, he’ll just get all concerned and angry and wonder why I wasn’t immediately treated.”
Inside, Carlisle was already feeling all those things I just described. “Well you shouldn’t have to sit there for two hours, bleeding out of your head. You should’ve been brought for a CT. C’mon, can’t have Dr. L/N’s daughter bleeding out in the waiting room.”
I smiled shyly as I felt his strong, cold hand be gently placed on my lower back as he guided me towards an exam room.
~
All throughout the exam Carlisle had to hold his breath. He has excellent control, it’s what many believe to be his special ability and it allows him to do what he loves but Y/N’s blood? The faintest smell alone made venom flood his mouth. And the blood soaked rag along with the fact that he had to bandage up her forehead didn’t help.
“Okay, that should do it,” he smiled, thankfully pulling back from his mate as he finished taping a bandage onto her head. “You’ll have to keep it bandaged for a couple days but your father should be able to help with that. And you most likely won’t scar.”
She breathed a sigh of relief. “Thanks Dr. Cullen. I owe you one.”
He shook his head, breathing a laugh as he looked down at the girl’s chart. “Please, I’m happy to do it. And you can call me Carlisle.”
“Carlisle,” she repeated, nearly melting the vampire right there, “that’s an interesting name, never heard it.”
“Well my parents were a bit old fashioned,” he explained. “So your father tells me you finished your first year at Johns Hopkins? That’s very impressive.”
He admired her blush as she looked down at the ground. “Thanks. I think I was the only one of my graduating class to go out of state.”
“Yeah, I’ve figured out Forks is a very small town. Not many people leave,” he chuckled. “Do you know what you want to study?”
“Um I’ve always kind of wanted to be a surgeon. I know it’s the most difficult specialty but I enjoy the precision of it,” she shrugged.
Carlisle felt a sense of disappointment at the news that his mate wanted to be a surgeon. Being a doctor was hard enough as a vampire but having to literally cut people open? Even he didn’t think he’d be able to focus surrounded by so much blood. He was already dreading having to tell her that she couldn’t be a surgeon after she turned, not at least for decades while she learned control. He was suddenly snapped from his fantasies realizing that this human barely knew him and practically everything he knew about her came from his lurking outside her windows.
Dragging himself out of his thoughts which had no doubt created a long, awkward pause he spoke again. “Yes, well if you made it to Johns Hopkins then I’m sure you can do it.”
“Thanks Doc- Carlisle,” Y/N corrected before standing up off the table and heading for the door.
As she exited, taking most of her intoxicating scent with her, Carlisle sucked in a breath he didn’t need. As much as he hated watching his mate leave he needed a break from her blood. No one had tempted him the way Y/N L/N had, even when he was a starving newborn. And he realized that he would have to figure out a way to get close to her and get her to love him before he even told her about the mate bond. A difficult feat considering her father’s place as his colleague.
~
When Carlisle got home that evening he immediately went to his room, tipping off the family that something was different.
As he collapsed backwards onto his sofa he let his mind wander to his mate. He could picture her face so clearly, and more frighteningly he could still imagine the smell of her blood with eerie accuracy. He imagined all his future endeavors to keep her safe as a human. He’d watch over her, always be within reach to step in when she needed. He pictured their love story. It’d be slow and start with glances and fleeting touches until he invited her out to dinner once she became more comfortable with him. He’d kiss her goodnight on the porch and then make sure she got into the safety of her home before leaving. Their relationship would develop from there with more dates, with Y/N’s father’s approval of course. And when she uttered the words ‘I love you,’ he’d tell her about him and his species because he knew he had earned her love. And as much as he didn’t want to damn her to a life of hiding and being a monster, he couldn’t help but imagine her turning. He’d gently bite into the soft flesh of her throat, injecting his venom into her veins, cementing her as his forever. But the thought of hurting her and turning her into a monster made him hesitate.
As Carlisle continued to immerse himself in his fantasies, his sister entered. “Carlisle?” Esme called softly. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” he agreed, sitting up. He wasn’t sure whether or not to tell his family that he had met him mate, considering they were already dealing with the human mate to Edward, Bella, who they had just moved back to Forks for. Of course no secrets stayed secrets for long thanks to Edward and Alice’s gifts. Edward could be counted on for discretion but Alice’s overeager nature wouldn’t allow that. He was surprised that Alice hadn’t already planned a party but maybe she hadn’t seen his mate in her visions yet. He had also wanted to keep her his own little secret for a while but clearly that wouldn’t be happening so he relented. “I- uh met my true mate.”
Esme’s eyes widened as she gasped. Of course living in a house full of vampires everyone heard and immediately began rushing in.
“You met your mate!” Alice practically screamed, nearly knocking over Esme.
“What’s she like?” Emmett asked with a grin. “Or he?” he added hesitantly.
“It’s a she,” Carlisle confirmed. “It’s very new. She doesn’t even really know anything about me and everything I know about her comes from lurking outside her window,” he groaned in embarrassment.
“Well that worked with Bella,” Jasper laughed.
Edward shot his brother a glare before looking back at his adoptive father. “Just find an excuse to be around her, ask her on a date.”
“That’s the thing, she’s 19-”
“You’re physically 23,” Alice cut in.
“Her father is my coworker,” he elaborated. “Besides they think I’m 31 at the hospital. And she just finished her first year pre-med.”
“So you’ll see her around the hospital!” Alice insisted, still trying to convince her adoptive father that everything would be fine. “Suggest that she comes to the hospital more to observe or do an internship! Then you can get to know her and ask her on a date.”
“That’s not actually the worst plan,” Edward admitted.
Carlisle thought for a second. That could actually work, he’d just have to figure out how to bring it up to her and her father naturally.
“So what’s she like?” Rosalie asked suddenly.
If vampires could blush Carlisle would be bright red. “Well um she has H/L, (hair length) H/T, (type) H/C (color) hair. She actually looks a lot like her father, Dr. L/N. She goes to Johns Hopkins. Look can everyone just go back to what they were doing?”
“But we want to meet her,” Alice practically whined.
In his frustration with everything Carlisle blurted out, “You may not even get to meet her.”
That dampened the mood. “What?” Esme asked softly.
“Nothing is decided yet but she’s human. We’re already dealing with Bella, the Volturi are already keeping their eyes on us, and I don’t want to doom her to this life if I don’t have to.”
“But this is your mate,” Alice insisted. “You’ve been alone for 350 years!”
“He has a point,” Rosalie cut in. “We can’t afford to have another human know about us especially with the Volturi sniffing around us. And we shouldn’t be turning people unless they’re actively dying.”
“But she’s his true mate!” Alice maintained, practically stamping her foot on the ground. “He can’t just turn his back on her.”
“Look nothing is decided,” Carlisle tried to calm Alice down. “I have to be back at work in a few hours and I need to hunt so if you’d all please let me be.”
Everyone shuffled out of the room reluctantly except for Edward. “It will break your heart to let that girl go.”
Carlisle paused. He knew that, the idea of letting her go live her life and potentially fall in love with someone else broke his heart. “I know,” he admitted. “But the thought of having to hurt her and make her like this hurts just as much.”
“So love her for the duration of her mortal life.”
“Just to watch her age, live in pain, and die? I couldn’t handle that.”
“But you’re doing it for her,” Edward pointed out.
“But if I’m doing it for her shouldn’t I just let her go live a normal life?”
Edward shrugged. “I don’t know the right answer here just that no matter what you choose it’ll kill you in some way. That’s the unfortunate truth about loving a human.”
~
A few weeks went by and Y/N became a routine part of Carlisle’s day. He’d usually see her at the hospital, working as a secretary. (A job she acquired even without Carlisle’s suggestion.) Because of that he had gained a reputation for hanging around the nurses station, flirting with Y/N. Not only did he learn about her through actually talking to her, he would make frequent trips to her house to watch her through the windows, even occasionally going into her room, which he felt wrong about but being surrounded by her scent dismissed any doubt from his mind.
“Y/N,” he greeted like he did every morning, bringing her a coffee.
“You must be spending a fortune on coffee,” she commented, taking the cup. She had protested several times, insisting that she pay him back but he refused every time so she just began to accept it.
“It’s nothing,” he dismissed. “But if it was it’d be worth it,” he flirted, earning a blush from the girl. Carlisle had learned a lot about flirting in these few weeks. At first it was a bit clumsy but he picked it up fairly easily with a little coaching from Rosalie and Emmett.
“Yeah well you won’t have to spend like $4.50 everyday for much longer, one of my professors is starting a research project a month before the semester begins and he invited me as a fellow,” she explained, a glimmer of disappointment behind her bright, casual expression.
If Carlisle’s heart wasn’t already frozen it would’ve stopped beating. He tried his best to hide his shock and disappointment. “Oh, well congratulations. Getting invited to stuff like this is really good for med school applications.”
“Yeah, and I like being here but it was too good of an opportunity to pass up, y’know? Plus it’ll be nice to see the sun again,” she awkwardly laughed, sensing the doctor’s unease.
“Yeah, um well I have to go get some labs. Congratulations, I’ll see you around,” he rushed out with a forced smile. He didn’t stay long enough to hear her response, rushing out of the room as fast as possible without being suspicious.
He couldn’t think straight. He of course had thought about her just leaving but now that it was actually happening, as well as happening sooner than expected, he didn’t know how to deal with it.
~
Carlisle had no clue what to do when it came to his mate leaving. He couldn’t stop her, that wasn’t fair to Y/N, so instead he kept his distance. Which was easy considering that he could smell her from a mile away. Until one day at the hospital when the scent of her blood was particularly strong.
“19 year old female, car crash. Resuscitated once in the field, three times en route,” the panicked voice of the paramedic echoed through Carlisle’s sensitive ears. He rushed into the ER, spotting her through the window of the trauma room. He mostly recognized her through her scent but would know that H/T, H/C hair and S/T skin through purple and blue bruises from a million miles away. But the next words from her attending doctor only confirmed the worst. “Page Dr. L/N, it’s Y/N!”
It felt like Carlisle had been sucker punched in the gut. It took everything in him not to stagger back and let out a dry sob right there in the ER. When her heart monitor flatlined he wanted to slaughter every person in that room in his grief. It was ridiculous, 350 years of self control would be gone just because of a girl. But not just any girl, his girl.
When they finally got Y/N’s heartbeat back they wheeled her up to surgery, just as Dr. L/N entered the ER. “Where’s Y/N? Where’s my daughter?” he demanded, trying to launch himself at the ER desk.
“D/N, D/N,” Carlisle tried to calm the distraught father. He had to physically hold the man back with vampire strength. Fortunately the ER was too chaotic for anyone to notice. “They took her up to surgery, she’ll be fine.”
“Surgery? Oh god,” the man began to cry. “But that’s my baby, she’s all I have.” With those words Carlisle began to feel guilty. Just a few weeks ago a part of him had been so ready to basically just kidnap this poor man’s daughter and completely shatter his world without a thought. “Oh god, surgery here is a death sentence.”
Carlisle began to protest before really thinking about it. Forks Hospital was small, their surgical staff consisted of two surgeons and whatever nurses that had completed the surgical nurse program. No one came her for surgery, they all went to Port Angeles and their non-emergent traumas went there too. The only people who came here were on the brink of death and unfortunately the two surgeons here weren’t exactly outstanding in their field. They were good enough but nothing remarkable and they usually lost their patients due to the circumstances.
~
Carlisle tried to carry on his day as if the love of his life wasn’t dying in a surgical suite right now. But the ordinarily smooth, confident doctor was distracted and constantly messing up. Until finally his shift was over and he went up to his mate’s room. He had orchestrated the nurses’ charts so she’d be placed in a secluded room should Carlisle need to intervene to prolong her life.
When he entered the room he was met with the most heartbreaking sight. Y/N was laid on the bed, an intubation tube sticking out of her throat. Her entire face was black and blue, some bones in her face looked like they had been broken. She hardly looked recognizable. On the only chair in the room sat her father looking like a worried mess. “Oh, hey Carlisle,” Dr. L/N said dejectedly.
“I’m so sorry, D/N.”
The man shrugged. “She’s tough. She managed to claw her way out of this place. She’ll survive this.”
“I hope so,” Carlisle agreed, staring longingly at his mate.
He didn’t want to arouse too much suspicion from Y/N’s father so he reluctantly went home to change and hunt.
After his quick hunt he re-entered his home finding Alice. “Carlisle, I’m so sorry,” she said softly. He wasn’t sure what to say to that but fortunately he didn’t have to come up with anything because she spoke again. “But you have to stay with her at the hospital if you want any shot at survival.” By now Edward had joined them.
“What?” Carlisle asked.
“She won’t survive this. You’re a doctor, you have to know that. So you’ll have to change her.”
Carlisle would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought of the scenario where Y/N was severely injured and he needed to change her. He looked up at his oldest son. “There’s nothing wrong about saving her life if she’s already dying.”
Not wanting to waste another second Carlisle sped off. He almost ran to the hospital but realized at the last second he should take the car. So he floored it, doing 150mph practically the whole way there. And finally parking in the back so he’d be able to bring her home unseen.
When he got to the hospital his ears were bombarded with thousands of sounds, something he was now used to, but because of his experience he was able to tune into his mate’s heart monitor while he got his plan ready.
Heading to the morgue he found a body that was a similar build and coloring to Y/N. Carlisle was by no means squeamish but it felt weird to break her bones and watch bruises form over her skin until her face was unrecognizable. He then scraped up as many ashes as possible to make it look like someone had cremated her so no one would go looking for her body. Setting the body aside he headed back upstairs finding Dr. L/N slumped over in a chair.
Carlisle hesitantly shook the older man awake. “Hey,” he said softly, willing the man to take his suggestion. “You should go home and rest. Get changed. I’ll watch over her.” The man hesitated, still staring at his fragile daughter. “She'll be fine, I’ll call you if anything happens.”
He reluctantly agreed before heading out, making Carlisle promise to call him even if her heart rate changed by two points.
Carlisle sat for a while, waiting for the hospital to calm down a bit before enacting his plan. First he went to the nurses station while no one was there, turning off the monitors that connected to his mate’s room. He then went back downstairs, using his hearing and sense of smell to bring the body up without being detected. Finally it was time to turn his mate. He stood over her bedside, observing her mortality for the final time. Through the black and blue of her face he admired her beauty, reminiscing the unique, flawed beauty of mortals.
This would be the most difficult transformation of his life. He was more nervous than when he had turned his sister who was his first turn. Y/N’s blood smelled so sweet he wasn’t sure he’d be able to pull away. He took a deep breath through his mouth before lowering his head to her throat, biting quickly. It took everything in him to pull away. He had never killed a human but he had tasted blood when he turned them and Y/N’s was like nothing he had ever tasted before. He knew he had to hold on long enough for the venom to inject into her bloodstream which made it even harder to pull away but he did it.
When he pulled back he could see blood seeping from her puncture wounds telling him he didn’t kill her. He quickly began disconnecting her from the machines before the venom could wreak havoc on her system. He then swapped her body for the one from the morgue, connecting the machines once again. Running down to the car he placed her unconscious figure in the backseat before going upstairs to reconnect the nurses station, alerting them that Y/N L/N was dying.
But by the time they reached her room with a crash cart Carlisle was already escaping with his prize in the back seat.
~
It took three agonizing days for Y/N’s transformation. Carlisle spent every moment he could at her side. He had to go to the hospital in order to not arouse suspicion where he unfortunately had to deal with her grieving father. He had called him on the way home to tell that he had gone to the bathroom and when he got back she was coding. But it didn’t seem to make anything easier for Dr. L/N as the man tried to tackle Carlisle when he walked into work. Fortunately for his secret a nurse stopped him. “You left her!” he screamed. “I lost my baby. I didn’t get to say goodbye because of you!”
At first Carlisle had been elated to finally have his mate (among other conflicting feelings) but now he was confronting the grief he had created. He realized that even if she was going to die anyway, if he hadn’t intervened her father would’ve gotten to say his final goodbye.
Meanwhile at home Y/N was laid on the soft couch in his room. She had spent the first two days sleeping fairly peacefully to the point that Carlisle was afraid he had killed her but her slowing heartbeat was assurance that she was okay. The third day was the hardest, he learned from Jasper that he could feel her pain. He was at work when the pain started and Alice had called him since she would be awake soon and Carlisle had wanted to be the one with her when she woke up.
Carlisle had been sitting by her side for a few hours, admiring her now clear skin, pure from all the bruises and broken bones she had received. In his own cold, stone hand, he now felt the same in her hand, all the warmth having been drained from it now as he played with her fingers adoringly.
~
Even before I opened my eyes I could hear so clearly. I could hear the rustle of clothing, the sound of skin rubbing skin as I realized a cold hand was playing with my fingers. As I became more aware I realized that my throat felt so dry it felt like it was burning.
Peeling my eyes open I was met with what seemed like the brightest object in the universe. I was half convinced I was staring directly into the sun except I could heat the hum of electric lighting.
“Is it too bright?” a voice— Carlisle’s voice asked.
Turning my head I met his warm, golden expression. When I nodded in agreement he ran towards the switch faster than I had ever seen anything move. Weird, but maybe I was just really groggy, but strangely I didn’t feel groggy, I felt more alive than I ever had.
Carlisle’s face reappeared in my field of vision, I could now more clearly see the flawlessness of his skin and the flecks of gold in his irises. Unbeknownst to me he was was also now observing the smoothness of my skin and the deep red hue of my eyes. Something about him felt safe and warm, like I never wanted to leave his side again. “Carlisle?” was all I could think of to say.
His adoring smile widened when I said his name. “Hey, Y/N. How are you feeling?”
“Good…” I answered hesitantly. I felt better than I ever had but his question made me think I shouldn’t feel good.
“That’s good. The transformation can be rougher for some people,” he explained, pulling away slightly to allow me room to sit up.
As I pushed myself up I moved so fast the couch slid to the side. My eyes widened, realizing what happened. “What’s going on? What transformation?”
He took my hands in his, now kneeling on the ground in front of me. “This is going to be strange and you won’t believe me but bear with me, okay?” he asked, looking up at me. One look in his eyes and I was melting so I just nodded, allowing him to explain. “I’m… a vampire. And I made you one too.” Laughs began to wrack my body, this had to be a joke. But one look at the grave sincerity on his face told me he wasn’t joking. “It’s true. It’s why when you sat up the couch moved. Why you’re probably really overwhelmed with all the sound, smells, lights, and feelings. Vampires are the most dangerous predators. We have better senses, are faster, and stronger than anything else.” Seeing my lost expression he rushed out the next words. “I know it’s a lot and I’m sorry I did this to you.”
“Why did you do this to me?”
“How much do you remember?”
“The last thing I remember is driv-” I suddenly realized what must’ve happened. “I was in an accident wasn’t I?”
Carlisle nodded his head regretfully. “You weren’t going to make it. That’s why I turned you. I didn’t want to do it. I was going to let you live your life as a human whether that be with me or with someone else but I couldn’t just let you die.”
“So what? You just turn every dying patient in the hospital?” I asked, trying to wrap my head around his words.
He shook his head no. “You’re the first I’ve turned in nearly 70 years. I couldn’t let you die because… well you see-” Carlisle was struggling with the best word choice to keep from scaring his mate off. “We’re mates… I knew the instant I saw you. Humans can’t feel it as strongly and it’s rare to meet your true mate but that’s what we are.” I didn’t know how to react, I didn’t even know exactly what I was feeling. “You don’t have to stay, you certainly don’t have to accept our bond but I thought you should know about it. Before you got hurt I was planning to hopefully be worthy of your love the old-fashioned way but given the circumstances…”
Before I could say anything the door swung open, revealing three more vampires. One had blonde curls, another with a brunette, short pixie, and the third had caramel hair and had a strong resemblance to Carlisle. “Hi, I’m Alice!” the bubbly brunette introduced.
“Um, girls-” Carlisle attempted to dismiss them so as to not overwhelm his mate.
“She’s probably thirsty,” the blonde insisted. Everyone looked over at me expectantly. Remembering the burning in my throat I nodded. Alice approached, opening a cup allowing the most appetizing scent to permeate through the air. I took it eagerly, frowning when I looked into the cup to find a thick, red liquid. Blood.
“It takes a bit of getting used to,” the caramel-haired one empathized.
“Trust me, you’ll like it,” Alice encouraged.
I gingerly brought it to my lips. The more I could smell it the thirstier I got so I downed the drink. The second the blood touched my lips I couldn’t get enough as I began to down the drink. Once it was all gone Carlisle gently brought the cup from my hands. “C’mon, you should meet the others,” he said, gently taking my hand in his. He led me out of his room, the three women following us into what looked like a very modern living room where there were three men waiting for us. “Y/N, these are my adoptive kids,” Carlisle explained as the blonde and Alice went to stand with their… brothers? “That’s Alice and Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie,” he pointed out the couples, “Edward, and my sister, Esme.”
~
The Cullen clan welcomed Y/N with open arms, including Bella when she eventually met the new vampire. It took a day or two of warming up but soon enough Carlisle and Y/N began to behave just like other mates. They were constantly together, and the rest of the Cullen clan were happy to finally see Carlisle so happy with his mate after 350 years.
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luvhu9hes · 4 months
Text
It Was Only a Kiss | EE73 x Fem!Reader
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Warnings: 18+ Content, Minors DNI, Underage Drinking, P in V, Thigh Riding, Cursing, use of pet names (baby, princess), not proofread, Slight Angst (If I missed anything please let me know)
Word Count: 2.4K
A/N: So, this is my first time ever writing something like this, this is also my first time writing smut. Please let me know what you think of this, but I'm also sensitive so please be nice abt it, thank you! All love - Chaela <3
"Come on y/n/n please, it's been so long since we've gone out together" Lydia pleads as I try to hide under my comforter. Normally I would love to go out and party with her, but ever since she started dating our friend Mark I've turned into a major third wheel. Don't get me wrong, I love the two of them and how happy they make each other, but sometimes I'd like to be able to enjoy myself without having to watch them suck each other's faces. After a tremendous amount of prodding Lydia finally coerced me out of bed picking out my outfit for the party.
"Lyds, are you sure I should wear this? Isn't it a bit, much?" I ask as I rake my eyes over the outfit she chose. The outfit consisted of a black miniskirt, a red lacy top which showed off the tops of my breasts really nicely, and some matching black boots.
"It's perfect y/n/n you look hot, nobody will be able to keep their eyes off of you babes."
I roll my eyes at her comment and go to finish my hair and makeup before grabbing my keys and head out the door following behind Lydia. The Soph house, home of the University of Michigan hockey team was only a 10 minute drive from our dorms and we arrived in no time. We made our way inside, music blasting throughout the house practically making the walls shake. The house was hot and stuffy as the sea of bodies was full of young adults grinding and dancing along to the music the air smelling of smoke and alcohol. Almost immediately upon arriving the two girls are greeted by Mark.
"Hey babe" he smiles leaning down to press a kiss to his girlfriend's lips, he then turns to the other girl greeting her as well.
"Hey y/n/n, we've missed you" he says hugging his friend.
"Hey Marky, I've missed you guys too, i've just been busy" I lied not wanting to admit i've been avoiding hanging out with the couple. Just as the three of you were about to head towards the kitchen to pour yourselves some drinks an arm makes itself comfortable around my shoulder causing me to look up and see none other than Ethan Edwards. You weren't exactly sure how the rivalry had started, but for as long as you could remember you and Ethan had hated each other. Growing up next door to each other you and Ethan had been forced to spend time around each other, due to always going to the same school and our parents being good friends. When I had gotten accepted to University of Michigan I had expected to finally escape the brunette, but of course to my disappointment he had been accepted right along with me. At the sight of the boy I tried to contain the look of disgust in my face as I pushed his arm off from around my shoulders. Upon Ethan's arrival Lydia and Mark took it upon themselves to make their way to their other friends across the house.
"Wow y/n/n, it's good to see you too." Ethan teased as he moved to put his hands in his pockets.
"What do you want Ethan?" I asked getting irritated by his presence.
"Pump the hate breaks princess, I was just trying to be civil" Ethan states as he holds his hands up in defense.
I scoffed at the idea, Ethan Edwards? Civil? I think hell would freeze over before that happened. I tried to push past him and move towards to kitchen to get alcohol in my system, but of course he had to follow right behind me. I grabbed myself a beer from the fridge cracking it open and letting the golden liquid glide down my throat the sensation already seeming to ease my annoyance. That was until a set of arms were working to trap me against the fridge.
"Ethan, what are you doing" I asked in a questioning tone.
"Just admiring" the boy admits.
"Where the hell is this coming from Ethan? For as long as I can remember you've hated me" I asked him.
"Who says I hate you?" he questions.
"I don't know Ethan, maybe the way you've been an asshole since the day I moved in next door" I state in a matter of fact tone.
"I wasn't trying to be an asshole y/n" the use of my full name shocks me as he continues. "I just wanted to get to know the pretty girl next door, but the only way I could think to get your attention was to tease you." He finally admits.
"W- what? You're telling me all of these years you've been an ass because you had a crush on me?" I ask hesitantly.
"Yeah, that's exactly what I was doing" Ethan starts,
"and if you'd let me make it up to you I'd show you exactly how I feel for you princess"
"Oh yeah?" I asked, my voice just barely above a whisper
"Yeah" he breathes, his hands on my hips as he leans his face down towards mine his lips ghosting over mine as he says, "You have no idea how long i've wanted this."
"Just kiss me already Ethan" I mumble starting to get impatient. Ethan doesn't take a second longer to crash his lips onto mine. I never would have thought that I would be in the kitchen of the Soph house making out with Ethan Edwards, but here I was with one hand tangled in his hair at the nape of his neck, while the other still held onto the long forgotten can of beer I had grabbed minutes earlier. I tugged at the ends of his hair causing him to groan into my mouth allowing me to slip my tongue in and explore his mouth with my own. After what feels like hours we finally pull away to catch our breath, but within seconds I'm pulling Ethan back down to my lips kissing him with a bruising force. Soon Ethan begins trailing his lips down to my jawline and my neck causing me to tilt my head back in pleasure allowing him more access as he nips and starts to leave marks all over. I know that at this point my panties are dripping from the immense amount of pleasure i'm receiving in this moment.
"Eth.." I moan out as his hands begin to explore my body. He hums in response not fully acknowledging me. "Ethan" I repeat this time in a more firm tone.
At the sound Ethan lifts his head from my neck to look at me. "What's wrong princess? Do you not want this? I can stop it's no problem I just-" he begins to ramble worried he's scared me off.
"No Ethan, I want this, just not- not in the kitchen Ethan" I say reassuring him. Ethan gapes at me as though he had completely forgotten that we were still in the middle of the kitchen. "R-right, well then let's get out of here" Ethan says as he grabs my hand guiding me through the crowd of people and upstairs towards his room. The second the door is locked behind us my back is pushed up against the door as Ethan smashes his lips against mine with the same intensity as minutes ago in the kitchen. My hands go to tangle themselves within his hair once more has his go around yo cup the backs of my thighs. “Jump princess” he mumbles into my lips and I comply immediately eliciting a breathy “good girl” from him causing me to moan into the kiss and him to smirk. Ethan backs us up until he's sitting on the foot of his bed with me straddling his lap. As though my hips had a mind of their own they slowly began to rut against Ethan's causing him to pull away and groan. “What have you done to me Princess?”
“Less talking, please” I breathe out as I continue to grind my hips against his. Ethan lets out a chuckle as he goes to take off my top, looking at me for approval to which I nod. He slowly removes the article of clothing and gapes as my bare breasts are revealed. Starting to feel a bit self conscious I go to move my arms in front of my chest to which Ethan immediately grabs my wrist saying “Don't hide from me now Princess, you're gorgeous.” His hands move from my wrists, down to knead my breasts letting his thumbs flick over my hardening nipples.
“Oh God” I moan out at the sensation and before I can speak again Ethan is enclosing my nipple in his mouth licking and sucking at the bud eliciting a string of curses to come pouring out of my mouth. I tug at the strands of Ethan's hair pulling him away from my chest and back to my lips, my hands moving down his chest to palm his strained cock through his jeans. “Oh Princess” he groans. The two of us are quick to start stripping each other down leaving ourselves bare in front of each other. To say Ethan was attractive was an understatement, he quite literally looked like he had been sculpted by Greek Gods with his chiseled jaw, toned abs, and his incredibly muscular thighs which you couldn't help but staring at. Ethan caught your gaze and smirked as he began to speak, “I see you looking at my thighs Princess” you flush at the realization you've been caught, but he only continues when he says “does that turn you on Princess, the thought of getting off just by pleasuring yourself on my thigh. You like that idea don't you?” he pulls me in by my wrist choosing to run his fingers along my slick folds “Look at you Princess you're so wet f’’me already, c’mon baby come ride my thigh like a good girl” he begins to slur lust evident in his voice. Not being able to decline his request I move to sit with my cunt directly on his thigh as he puts his hands on my hips and begins to set the pace for me flexing his thigh every once in a while the muscles in his thigh touching my clit sending the most delicious sense of pleasure coursing through my body. I very quickly could feel the the very familiar knot tying in my stomach as Ethan quickened the pace enjoying the view of me getting off just at the feel of his thigh. Reaching between our bodies I snaked my hand down to my clit pressing tight circles only increasing the pleasure I was feeling at the moment. “I- I’m close” I'm barely able to muster out before my orgasm overtakes me and I clench my eyes shut leaning forward to bite Ethan's shoulder at the sensation.
Ethan mumbles sweet nothings in my ear as he moves his face to the crook of my neck leaving sloppy kisses in his wake. As I come down from my post orgasmic sensation I reach my hand down to begin stroking Ethan's cock which is angry due to its lack of attention. This is a sign to Ethan that I am ready for more. Quickly Ethan moves us around so that I am laying with my back against his mattress with him hovering over me leaning down to leave a kiss on my lips, this one was different from the others, not full of lust or need, it was a kiss full of passion and emotion. Ethan pulls away and looks me in the eyes with a look clearly asking for permission to which I quickly nod needing to feel him inside me. “Uh uh baby, I need words Princess” he says.
“Ethan please, need your cock. Need you t’ fill me up so good” I babble. That's all he needs to hear before teasing my folds with the tip of his cock and then pushing into my entrance without warning causing us both to moan out at the feeling.
“Fuck baby you're so tight f’me, milking my cock so good baby” Ethan groans into my ear.
“So full Eth. You fill me up so good” I practically cried.
Sure I had had hookups throughout the last few years, nobody had ever been able to please me like Ethan already had, and nobody even came close in size compared to Ethan. After adjusting to the stretch, I encouraged Ethan to move and he did just as I had asked. At first it was painful due to the new feeling but soon that pain was replaced with pleasure. Once the pain was gone I urged Ethan to to move faster to which he gladly obliged setting a harsh pace eliciting almost pornographic sounds from my mouth. All that could be heard throughout the room was the sounds of skin slapping and moans coming from both me and Ethan. The knot in my stomach began tightening again as I was starting to get closer and closer to my orgasm for the second time of the night. I could tell Ethan was getting close as well as I could feel his thrusts getting sloppier and his cock twitching inside of me at each thrust.
“‘m so close Ethan, so close” I breathe out.
“Me too Princess, I want you to cum with me baby, okay? Can you do that f’me baby?”
“Yes, please Ethan ‘m gonna cum”
Ethan reached between our bodies going to draw tight circles on my clit, pulling my orgasm out of me, my pussy fluttering around his cock milks his orgasm out of him as he lets himself lay on top of me. We lay there for a couple of minutes coming down from our highs basking in the post orgasmic feeling. Once we’ve caught our breath Ethan gets up pulling on his boxers leaning down to press a kiss to my lips before he heads to the bathroom. He returns with a washcloth in his hand going to clean the mess made between my thighs trying to be gentle as to not cause overstimulation. Ethan then goes to grab me a pair of his boxers and a shirt for me to sleep in. After I get dressed Ethan opens his arms for me to come join him under the covers to which I happily obliged laying with Ethan as we slowly drifted off to sleep, deciding to leave the conversation about where this will lead for tomorrow.
fin.
a/n: I have no clue how I feel about this or if I even like this but yk 💁🏻‍♀️
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reputationgf · 1 year
Text
summer went away, still the yearning stays.
kaz brekker x grisha.
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genre - slight angst, fluff.
summary - Three years ago you were taken away from Kaz to Ravka to train as a Grisha, now you found your way back to him and he was your again, Kaz Rietveld was yours again.
word count - 2.3k
a/n : hi wow writing after a long time !! also the summary of this sucks lowkey but we roll <33 please reblog/comment it makes my day <33
leave reqs here !! (no promises tho)
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The little palace never felt like home. Something about being considered superior and the ongoing talks about how being a grisha was a gift by the saints, one meant to be cherished made you irritated. Being a grisha was what took your real life away, took you away from a person you cared for the most, Kaz brekker.
Kaz brekker was known by many names be it the bastard of the barrel or dirtyhands but you never knew him as those, to you he simply was Kaz Rietveld, to you he would always be the boy who was caring and smart and broken. Life hadn't been kind to him and it probably still wasn't.
When you both were fourteen and were roaming around the streets of Ketterdam without a care in the world on your part, some grisha came and took both of you to be tested, Kaz wasn't one but you turned out to be, and then without a choice you were taken away from him to the little palace. You wished you had put up more of a fight, maybe even tried using whatever powers you had to free yourself, maybe then you'd still be in Ketterdam with the one you wanted.
But deep down you knew however hard you would've tried you wouldn't have been to run away. You missed everything about your old life even if it wasn't the most safe and comfortable, even if you weren't guaranteed a meal everyday, even if it meant living on the edge everyday cause it meant you could be with him.
You were now seventeen and you felt like you knew nothing except the fact that you missed him. And now you were amidst a war for a country you weren't sure you cared for but you still helped of course, you battled for Genya to receive her justice, you battled for the people who lost their lives due to General Kirigan being an abomination to the society and using people as pawns in his own twisted game.
"Zoya let me come with you to Shu Han." You spoke with eagerness in your voice.
Ever since knowing about the plan to hire the crows to retrieve the Neshyenyer from Shu Han you've been on your toes. This could be the one chance to see him before you possibly died. You weren't going to give up on that.
"Tolya is coming with me I've already told you this once before." Zoya said, Her voice was dripping with sternness, she didn't want any further arguments, "besides why do you even want to come with me?"
You glared at the woman in front of you, it felt as if the fire that normally blazed through your fingers was now in your eyes, "you know why." You said, your voice cold, your jaw clenched.
Zoya studied you, she saw the way your hands were in a tight fist and how your lips were in a thin line. She noticed the slight hitch in your breath and the way your eyebrows were scrunched, then she met your eyes. Your eyes were filled with a fire she had only seen once before when you had found out General Kirigan's reality.
"Fine. You can come with me," She said tilting her head slightly, "don't make me regret this." A smirk rested on Zoya's face.
"I won't. Thank you." You said and gave her a nod, going away to get ready for your travels to Ketterdam and then Shu Han.
Ketterdam. You had so many feelings about Ketterdam that it overwhelmed you. Was Ketterdam your home? Maybe it was cause he was there. Or was it your enemy, the place which broke and bruised you, which made you feel as if someone took a dagger and slowly ran it through your body, just enough to sting forever. Was it a place that placed an irreplaceable hurt in you or was it a place you longed to be in cause he was there. Sometimes you found yourself missing Ketterdam, or maybe you just missed Kaz. After all, it's always the people who make a place feel like home, a safe haven.
-
The whole ride to Ketterdam to you was completely utterly anxious. Your fingernails dug deep into your fist, your bottom lip so chewed out that you could now taste blood in your mouth. You had to remind yourself to breathe and your heart to beat. One of your hands reached the necklace that laid against your chest, your fingers softly gripping its pendant— a heart, engraved with flowers around the corners and a capital R in the middle. You had remembered the day Kaz had given it to you, it was your fourteenth birthday. He had nicked it from a pawn shop and hoped you'd like it. You remembered it as clear as day how he gave it to you, it was a memory that brought you peace, taught your heart how to beat again. You closed your eyes, releasing the tight grip of your fist and freeing your lips from your teeth. Taking a deep breath you lost yourself in the memory.
"hey," Kaz called out to you, your name leaving his lips, "come in"
You followed Kaz into his room and sat on the chair of his study, he opened his cupboard and removed a small circular velvet box. Your eyes curiously followed the box and him as he sat on the bed opposite to your chair, his hand still holding the box. You looked at him and slightly raised your eyebrows.
"happy birthday" he said, holding out the box for you to take. His voice seemed almost emotionless, like always, but this time you could hear the slightest quiver in it. Was Kaz Brekker nervous?
Your face adorned a smile, "is this for me?" You asked him, your voice slightly teasing.
"yes." He spoke, motioning you to take the box.
You took the box from him gingerly, a small thank you leaving your lips as you gave him a big smile, your finger ran along the edges of the box feeling the soft velvet and then you opened it. A soft gasp of surprise leaving your mouth as you removed the necklace out of the box, "Kaz! This is so precious" you said, an even wider smile now covered your face, the one where he could see your teeth, "thank you so much." You spoke earnestly.
"I'm glad you like it." Kaz spoke, the tiniest of smiles on his face.
You studied the pendant, your finger dragging along the pink flowers carved along the heart's edges, you smiled at the 'R' in the middle of the heart, "There's a 'R' in the centre of the heart" you said, your eyes meeting his, your eyebrows raised slightly as if questioning him.
Kaz remained silent, you felt as if you said something wrong, maybe you shouldn't have pointed it out, maybe it was accidental. But then Kaz said, "This way, there's always a piece of the real me with you." of course it wasn't accidental, kaz brekker is a mastermind, everything he does will always have a meaning.
"Thank you," you said, putting the necklace on, "I love it"
He merely gave you a nod and you left his room.
-
"Let me do the talking." Zoya said, her eyes on your face as you stepped into the crow club, you hummed a noise of approval your eyes desperately searching the dim lit room which reeked of alcohol, a smoky haze covered the room. Someone approached Zoya, you didn't know who he was nor you cared cause it wasn't him.
You soon got lost in your thoughts again, kaz often had that effect on you. You couldn't stop thinking about how he would react to seeing you, would he even acknowledge you? Would he show the slightest reaction? You weren't sure. Soon, Zoya grabbed your arm and tugged on it, "Let's go? I've been calling your name." Her voice had its usual sternness.
"Yeah, right, sorry." You spoke softly, your face held a look of melancholy, Zoya noticed it and her eyes softened, she placed her hands on yours gingerly and gave it a gentle squeeze, "it'll be okay" she said softly, offering you a small smile. You gave her a warm smile and a nod as you both walked towards a hall led by someone.
"Boss will meet you here", the man said as he opened the door to a room which looked like a study, you walked in and Zoya took a seat on the wooden chair kept opposite the table. You walked along the room, your eyes taking in every single corner of the room. You saw the painting hung up on the wall, scrolls of paper neatly placed on the side table, a black wool coat hung on the coat rack. Your breath hitched slightly, "was it his?," You thought, your hand reaching out to touch it, your hand grazed along the soft wool and then you heard the door open. You turned around and your eyes widened a little, your mouth slightly open, a breath left your mouth and your eyes met his striking blue ones. You felt as if time had stopped, you could feel your heart beating fast, so fast that you could feel it in your throat. "Kaz" you said, your voice barely a whisper.
Kaz's eyes widened a little, you could see his grip tighten on his cane, you gave him a little smile, he had to remember you. How could he not?
Zoya's sharp voice suddenly cut the thick tension that settled in the air, "Kaz Brekker, Ravka seeks your help." Her hand holding a letter out to him. A scowl covered Kaz's face, he snatched the letter off Zoya's hand, "We aren't patriots," he said grimly, his eyes meeting Zoya's.
"The money isn't the matter, the king will give you your price" She said with certainty.
Kaz hummed in response, his eyes reading the letter and then it met yours again. Oh those eyes, how you had longed to see them, Kaz's brown eyes were something you'd never forget. You couldn't even if you had tried. His eyes were the shade of brown you saw everyday in your morning coffee, you saw his eyes in the dark leather bound books, you saw his eyes in pieces of dark chocolate. For you he was everywhere- he was in the game of cards you saw younger Grisha playing, he was in the snarky remarks passed around, but more importantly, he was always in your heart.
"Leave." he said now looking at Zoya, "we will discuss about this in a moment." His voice sounded bitter.
Zoya hesitated, her eyes followed yours and she gave you a nod, "Fine, but just a moment", she uttered, leaving and slamming the door shut.
"Kaz," You called out, this time louder. Your voice held desperation in it, it was soft yet tense- you wanted to hold him, you wanted to touch him and try to make up the lost time, you took a step closer to him, "i missed you" you said, your hand fiddling with your necklace.
Kaz's eyes followed your hand, he was surprised to find out you still had the necklace with you, "Three years." he spoke, his voice softer now, "it's been three fucking years." you could see his walls slowly breaking down, his eyes becoming softer, the grip on his cane becoming weaker. "I wondered if you had died", his voice quivered slightly, his eyes glossier.
Another step forward, "How could i die without seeing you?", you said, humor in your voice, "Kaz, are you okay? is everything okay?" you asked, your face held a look of melancholy, your lips pursed.
"You look different," Kaz said, ignoring your question, "you look beautiful." he said slowly, a small smile playing on his lips.
you could feel the tears in your eyes, you smiled at him, a soft giggle left your lips, "Thank you, but that still doesn't answer my question, are you okay?"
"I missed your laugh" he said, "i missed you." This time Kaz took a step towards you, his gloved hands tensed a little. "You still have the necklace." he remarked.
You nodded, "how could i not carry a piece of the real you with me always?"
Kaz looked down, his hand tracing patterns on his cane, "I hated being away from you" he admitted, "i-" he took a breath, his eyes meeting yours, the look on his face made you want to cry, you could feel your eyes filling up with tears again, "I needed you" he said, your name leaving his lips, another breath in, "I wanted you".
You tilted your head slightly, your hands wiping the few tears on your cheek, "I am sorry,"
"It wasn't your fault." he said quickly.
"You have me now, if you still want me." you said, your voice slow, "after this, this war is over I'll stay here in Ketterdam, if you want me too"
Kaz's face looked like that of a young boy again, he was changed in the way he was now, he was dirtyhands, the bastard of the barrel, he was someone people feared- but right now, in this moment, he was Kaz Rietveld again.
"I will always want you." He said slowly, his hand reached out for yours, it tensed a little.
"Kaz you don't have too-"
"I want you to stay." He said, his hand relaxing in yours, "i want you." He gently squeezed your hand.
"Then you'll have me" you said smiling, "you will have me Kaz Rietveld."
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sunshine-theseus · 4 months
Text
Meme Girls | Zecira Mušovic x Reader
Words: 2.7k Summary: doing a video with Zecira leads to a lot of unnecessary angst Warnings: angst, poor early a.m. writing request for - @wosofanfics note: y'all i'm sorry if this sucks. it has been proof read but i'm literally half asleep and it's 1:15am. i hope it's good.
“Welcome back to another episode of Meme Girls.” Laughter breaks out across the room as Zecira tries to introduce the video, tripping over her own tongue.
Aggie and I are sat on bean bags facing each other, Zecira between us. We were supposed to doing a football challenge with some of the other girls for someone’s YouTube channel but whoever was supposed to be joining the goalkeeper here had to pull out. That left us.
“To my- stop laughing! To my right side, Agnes Beever Jones!” I give a small cheer and clap as Aggie throws her hands up in the air, all of us laughing simultaneously. The camera man gives us a dirty look, a sign for us to hurry this up.
“And to my left,” I give her a wink when Zecira turns her head to look at me.
“Y/n, the hotshot, L/n!” I can hear some of the girls outside the door, cheering on as well as they pass by, some even whistling.
“Why does she get a cool nickname? That’s not fair.” Aggie complains, adjusting herself in her beanbag to look at me.
“I’m simply better.” A cheshire grin is thrown her way.
-
“When Emma tells you training is cancelled because of the rain.” The prompt is arguably quite easy but we both spend some time contemplating which photo suited it best. Aggie holds up a relatively old picture of Fran, clearly walking off the bus for a game, her thumbs are up, and earphones are in.
“Completely chill. A day to relax and have no worries, spend time with friends. Whatever you want.”
“Nah it’s time to celebrate. That call is rare and I’m appreciating every damn second.” I rather aggressively pull my photo from the stack of cards. A picture of me from last season after a UWCL game against Lyon, my shirt clutched in my hands as I knee slide into the corner after scoring the winning goal.
“Wow. You look really good there.” Zecira’s voice is pretty alluring as she compliments me, and I turn a fiery shade of red.
“This isn’t fair. Z is going to pick you because you’re in love or whatever.” The young striker whines.
“You and the fans with those stupid speculations. We’re just best friends.” I avoid looking at Z as I try to jokingly tell Aggie off, her eyes rolling at my denial. What I do miss is the light that dims in Zecira’s eyes as I say it.
“Whatever you say.”
We’re given a few more prompts before the media manager calls time. I end up winning 3-2, Aggie tossing a fit by throwing her cards at me. Her fake childishness is scolded by one of the onlookers, clearly too serious in comparison to us, but we only continue to laugh as we stand from the bean bags. I take hold of Zecira’s hand to help her up as well but pull too hard, the Swede falling forward as I rush to catch her. My hands slip under her shirt as I grab her hips and both of us blush a deep red as I try to apologise, trying to forget the feeling of her skin beneath my hands.
-
The next few days between Zecira and I are awkward. Between the tripping situation and the comments from Aggie, our relationship had been strained and neither of us wanted to bring it up, so we didn’t talk at all. The things fans had to say under the video didn’t help.
‘Zecira and Y/n are definitely dating right?’
‘Find someone who looks at you the way Z looks at Y/n’
‘New favourite friends to lovers.’
They were funny, sure, but untrue. At least that’s what I told myself whenever I looked at my best friend, dark hair tucked behind her ears while laughing at something Guro said, and I felt jealous. Or when I go to score a goal in training and she dives for the ball, her shirt riding up and the tight muscles of her abdomen flashing briefly, and I can feel my face heat up and my stomach tighten.
And eventually, due to popular demand, I’m back in another video, facing Sam in a ‘Meme Girls Championship’.
“Welcome to the Meme Girls Championship. Today we have the two winners of the previous games, Samantha Kerr and Y/n L/n. Are you ready?” Sam lets out a guttural scream and I simply nod, trying not to freak out about the tingle in my leg where Zecira and my legs touch.
“Here we go. When you make a tackle outside the penalty box, but the other team still get the penalty.” I flick through my cards, searching for the best one, but Sam is ready in no time.
She holds up a picture of Zecira and Ann-Katrin, standing side by side with sour looks on the faces. It’s good enough for a chuckle but I’m certain I can get a better one. I eventually land on a picture of Jessie. She’s dressed in an old training kit, hands covering her face, clearly disappointed in something.
Zecira takes a moment, looking back and forth between the two photos we’re holding up.
“Zecira. You’re in it.” Sam gives her a side eye, hinting at the fact she thinks she should win.
“Wifey Z. You know this is the better one.” The nickname had been a running joke between us for some time, so neither of us think much of it, despite the obvious fact we probably both wished it meant more.
“Mmmm, I have to go with Y/n’s.”
“No! These cards are unfair! I used that last time and you picked Jessie’s one of me breaking my shoulder!”
“Get wrecked Sammy.”
-
The comments under that video are unexpected. I don’t remember doing anything that would elicit any ‘couple’ comments, yet they were full of them.
‘I think Y/n just accidentally exposed their relationship at 1:17’
‘WIFEY? She knowwws. They’re definitely together, you don’t just call someone your wife.’
So apparently, I did imply we were a couple, but it was from a simple misunderstanding. The issue that comes with that is the inability to deny it. If you deny it, fans assume you’re hiding something, and obviously there was nothing to confirm, so we had to live with it.
Turns out it was hard to live with. Anytime either of us posted, those comments would pop up, asking us to confirm it. At games there were fans shouting it out. Even the girls began speculating whether we’d been secretly hiding a relationship for who knows how long. It was beginning to get tiring, especially when I have feelings for her.
I wanted nothing more to just go up and kiss her and tell her how much I like her, then the comments could be true, and I’d know that. Hopefully it’d also mean I’d get to hold her hand as we walk side by side and kiss her good morning every day. But I was certain she didn’t feel the same, so that was that.
~~~~~
It took a week after the video was posted for things to go back to normal within the team and between Zecira and I. Occasionally Millie or Jess would jokingly ask us ‘how the married life is’, or something along those lines, and we’d all just laugh.
It was a tradition between me and Z, that after a London derby, we’d pick a nice restaurant and go out for dinner. Both of us get dressed up and walk out of the stadium together, sign a few things and go. It started in 2021 and we hadn’t missed a dinner since. So obviously that’s what I prepared for when we had a derby coming up.
I had a new rusty orange, satin dress that I’d brought in preparation for the dinner. Hanging it on the rack in my cubby before I got changed into our warm-up kit always made me a little nervous, aware of the casual outfits that adorned everyone else’s wracks. I didn’t bother looking over at Zecira’s space, expecting her outfit to be hanging like it always was. Perhaps I should have.
-
The game was tough as always during a derby, and very physical. The likes of Katie McCabe and Caitlin Foord made it difficult to stay standing if the ball was at your feet and I knew I was likely to come out with bruises from the start. I must say I didn’t expect the black eye that began swelling after an elbow to the face from Lotte.
By half time I looked a wreck, and Emma was prepared to sub me off if they didn’t let up by 60 minutes. I’d lost count of the number of bruises that had begun developing on my legs and arms, even my torso was sure to be black and blue, and admittedly my eye was somewhat hard to see out of. I was also limping, a studs up tackle from Katie landing on the inside of my right ankle making the tissue rather tender.
“You’re going to look like that blueberry girl from Willy Wonka soon.” Zecira jokes as we make our way back out to the pitch.
“Heh yeah, dinner might be a little awkward for the other people around.” I get a smile back before she makes her way to the goal, and I head to the middle of the field to meet with Erin to do some short drills again.
-
The game ends in a tie. 2-2 across the board. I gathered more injuries as the game went on but nothing that wasn’t more than superficial, and I was buzzing to sign a few things and take some pictures with the fans before heading back and dressing up for dinner with my best friend.
Then I see them. Zecira is only a few people away from me at the barrier, talking to a guy. The conversation seems very interesting and sweet, nothing more than a footballer meeting a fan. Until they kiss. So, as her best friend, I make my way over. Why had she never mentioned him?
“Hey Z! Who’s this?”
“This is Tom. We’re dating, nothing official yet. He’s going to take me out for dinner tonight.” It’s hard to be upset when you see the smile that spread across her face. Her dimples were showing and there was a sparkle in her eye. But I wasn’t one to just let someone break a tradition after 2 and a half years.
“Tonight? What, after we go to dinner? You know, at the restaurant we’ve been waiting for a table at for months?”
“N- no I mean right after I get changed.”
“We always do tonight Z.” I start to seethe through my teeth.
“Well can’t you go like tomorrow or something?” I understand Tom was trying to help. I can only assume he wasn’t aware about the years long tradition between the girl he’s dating and her best friend. But I could imagine that if we were in a cartoon, steam would be coming out of my ears and my arm would be swinging, getting ready to knock him out in one hit.
“Uhhh, no. No we cannot. Because not only does it take months to get a table, we have to go tonight because it’s tradition. Routine. We’ve never missed a derby dinner once Zecira and like damn I’m going to let us start now. Not for some guy.”
“Common it’s just one. It’s not that big a deal. I’ll make up for it I promise.”
“Make up for it? There’s no making up this dinner. But have fun with Tom. I guess I’ll go get real dressed up, eat portions that are far too small and drink much too expensive wine by myself and be thrown looks all night. See you in training.” As I storm off, I catch glimpses of the remaining crowd that is yet to trickle out and realise perhaps I should have waited.
Now embarrassed as well as angry, I run down the tunnel in desperate search for an empty room. I eventually stumble into one and slam the door closed and lock it. The walls rattle and I hear something fall off one of them, but I find it hard to care as I search for the light switch.
Once I find it, it’s hard for me to hold back all the emotions that have been building up over some time. I rip my boots of and throw them at the door with all my might. I’m surprised the window doesn’t shatter.
“Stupid fucking feelings. Stupid fucking dinner. Stupid fucking Tom. Stupid fucking game.” The list goes on for some time as I cry, broken up every now and then by a scream.
Eventually I slump to the floor in the middle of the room and sob. My chest heaves and I struggle to breathe as I cry into the ground. The bruises and black eye are long forgotten as my lungs struggle to expand, and I begin to panic.
‘This cannot be fucking happening right now no no no.’ a panic attack is the last possible thing I need and I’m in a random room all alone. No one knows where I am. Everyone could have gone home by now.
My head is pounding. Or maybe it’s someone at the door. I’m not sure. I don’t have the energy to figure it out.
‘I hope someone finds me soon’ is probably the last thought I’m aware of having. But then someone’s arms wrap around me. Their perfume is familiar, but I can’t quite place it as they hook an arm beneath my knees and another behind my back. Most of my surroundings are lost, sight blurred and hearing fuzzy as I try to draw in more air, so I don’t know where I am until I feel a mattress beneath me.
I could identify the medical room beds in my sleep, and this was definitely one. After a few minutes of just resting there, my breathing started to slow and I came around. Newly aware of a hand gripping my own, I turn to the person beside me.
“Zecira? What are you doing here? You have dinner with what’s his face.”
“You’re more important. And, what you said on the field… you’re right. I was wrong in breaking tradition for some guy I’m not even really into. It’s- it’s just…” she trails off with a sigh.
“It’s just that, I needed something to take my mind off you.”
“Off me?”
“Yes. Look, after those videos we did on media day, and the one after, I couldn’t fathom the idea of me telling you how I feel and you rejecting me. I like you so much but I know you don’t like me back so I started going on dates. Tom was the only bearable one.”
“Wait wait wait wait. You think I don’t like you? Zecira, there aren’t enough words to express how much I like you. Seeing you with Tom, it, it made me mad about the dinner sure, but I was also jealous. I want to be the one kissing you and taking you on dates, holding your hand, celebrating a win.”
“What?”
“Kiss me you fool.” The angle is poor but despite it, we lean toward each other until our lips are connected.
It becomes quite a hungry kiss, but I pull away before it can get too heated, smiling at the girl in front of me.
“If we get ready and leave now, we could still make that reservation. Make it our first date?”
-
That’s how we end up hand in hand, waiting to be seated. The satin gown hugs me perfectly and compliments Zecira’s sage green dress.
“I’m really sorry for bursting up on you. Especially on the pitch.”
“I deserved it.”
“No you didn’t. Maybe you should’ve told me in advance but it didn’t warrant that reaction.”
“I should’ve spoken to you about what was going on.”
“Kiss me and we call it even?” her hair falls around our faces as she leans down to kiss me. It’s gentle and sweet and tastes like her vanilla lip gloss. Life feels good when you’re in love with your best friend.
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twsted-kinks · 9 months
Text
Biology Nerd (Malleus X Yuu/Reader)
>minors and ageless dni<
MC/Reader goes by Yuu and gender neutral and fat (I don't really mention that but this is self indulgent and I'm fat so reader is fat)
Something kinda fluffy for once with a bit of spice and a dash of angst
Content Warning: cultural and biological differences, Yuu not knowing about cultural differences and doing romantic and sexual things with others, Malleus letting Yuu touch him inappropriately but Yuu doesn't understand that touching him like that is very intimate and/or sexual for fae/dragons, Malleus being absolutely smitten, some slight Malleus angst about him being lonely, Grim being scared, dragon cuddles
(I'm probably gonna write more spec biology stuff with twst but idk)
Yuu will be the first to say that suddenly being ripped from your home and put into a completely different world where everything you know no longer exists or applies to reality fucking sucks. But, Yuu will also admit that they love having a whole new world to learn about. Learning the basics of a whole knew evolutionary and sociological history with multiple sapient species that are both human and non human while having access to a full college library? Sign them the FUCK up! Crowley was thankful for Yuu's enthusiasm. Simply allowing full access to the library appeased them. Grim did not have fun at first, but having a human look at him in awe helped. Yuu was so curious about his ability to speak and his connection to fire magic. They would not stop asking him so many questions!
Yuu went around learning with wide eyes like a toddler. They at least knew not to just randomly touch people and that it's inappropriate to ask in the first place, but still, they would not stop staring. Leona, Ruggie, and Jack can constantly feel Yuu's eyes on their ears and tails. Leona gets annoyed and snaps at Yuu usually while Ruggie will let Yuu touch then in exchange for either money or food. Jack doesn't comment on it while Yuu does nothing to try to touch him, and Jack is happy to keep it that way.
Floyd and Jade find Yuu's reactions to them to be greatly entertaining. During their first interaction, all of Yuu's friends immediately ran, but Yuu stayed, just staring up at the twins.
"I like y'all's teeth." And with a few simple words, the tweels were glued to Yuu. Yuu is always excited to see their mer form, but will gladly settle on hanging out with the tweels when they got legs. Yuu also enjoys being on teeth cleaning duty. They get to look at cool sharp teeth and a second jaw. They also get free food from the twins, and all they got to do is clean some teeth? Hell yeah! Azul could inform Yuu about what Floyd and Jade opening their mouths means for eel mer culture, but this little arrangement keeps the two out of trouble. Plus, Azul is afraid Yuu will go on a question asking tangent and will ask about Azul's mer form, and he does not want to deal with that.
The species and cultures Yuu knows the least about is the fae. Yuu honestly didn't even notice that fae were a thing until Ace pointed out the ppinty ears, and Yuu just went :o "Holy shit" :D "That's so cool!" Then there was Yuu's first time meeting Malleus. Should Yuu be more concerned about a stranger just wandering around outside their dorm? Yes, but he has HORNS! The first words spoken between the dragon fae and little magicless human were:
"Wow, your horns are pretty."
Malleus was taken aback by this human, just talking to him casually, complimenting his horns, and smiling at him with so much wonder. Even though Malleus never gave his name, his friendship with the human grew fast. Yuu came up with a multitude of names for Malleus, having a new one each time they met. Horton, Sir Hornington, Goth Babe, Briar Boy, Fae Bae, and more, but a few reoccurring ones Malleus adores. Malmal is the most recent iteration of his name that has stuck around the longest. But,, whenever Malleus visits Yuu upset, Yuu always calls him sweetie and tries to comfort him. It's gotten to a point that the Yuu always keeps a tub of ice cream in their freezer specifically for when Malleus is upset.
Malleus always knew Yuu had an interest in the different cultures and species of the Twisted Wonderland, but he didn't understand just how fascinated you were until the time for Halloween came and Yuu saw Malleus's tail for the first time. Malleus remembers it clearly. Yuu stopped a couple feet away from him, gasped, and then screamed "CHONKY TAIL!!!" The human immediately went behind Malleus, started admiring his tail, and asked so many questions. One of them being if they can touch it, and he let you, much to the dismay of Sebek who was trying to get Yuu to be more respectful. Lilia was the only one to pick up on the blush on Malleus's ears. Yuu did mistake Malleus's tail as a part of the costume, not realising it was actually a part of him at first, and apologized, but Malleus assured you it was alright and that the can keep touching his tail. He didn't mind at all.
Now, Malleus almost abuses the admiration Yuu has for his tail. Lilia, Sebek, and Silver absolutely notice his tendency to approach them and, if they were focusing on something that isn't him, Malleus will fwip out his tail and Yuu would become entranced. Yuu just adores Malleus's tail and, whenever given the chance, will touch it, pet it, even just hold it. Malleus finds it endearing and adorable.
And well, Yuu already has permission to touch his tail, why not ask Malleus if they can learn more about his anatomy? Yuu asks to touch Malleus's horns one day. Yuu’s already stepped over the line with touching his tail, so why not let Yuu touch his horns? Malleus has now turned into Yuu's personal lapcat much to Grim’s dismay. Malleus has gifted the human with a kit for horn cleaning and visits Ramshackle regularly so he can rest his head in Yuu’s lap and have them clean his horns. Yuu is pretty sure Malleus dirties his horns on purpose just so they wil clean them, but they don't mind.
One day though, during the weekend, Yuu invites Malleus over for a full-blown sleepover. Malleus is ecstatic and quickly informs his entourage. Sebek is fully against it while Lilia and Silver think this wil be good for Malleus, though Silver wants the three of them to tag along as well. It takes some convincing, but Lilia convinces the other to let Malleus have his alone time with the child of man. Malleus packs his essentials and teleports to Ramshackle to find the prefect and Grim gathering pillows and blankets, getting materials ready to build a pillow fort.
Malleus has an absolute blast. Such simple games and activities he’s never experienced before, Malleus enjoys it all. Everything is going smoothly, Malleus is relaxing, face cuddled into Yuu’s chest. A moving picture plays on the human’s little screen device while Grim snores as he sleeps on a pillow twice his size. Yuu is petting Malleus's hair, running their fingers through it when they pause at his bangs. They shift the hair covering his forehead and gasps.
“You got scales there?” Yuu says in astonishment as they study the black scales on Malleus's forehead.
“Hm? Have you not seen them before now?” Malleus asks.
“I guess I haven't.” Yuu runs their fingers across the scales. “They're pretty. I'm surprised you don't have more scattered around.”
“Oh, I do, but I find others are less intimidated when they're hidden. My clothing preferences hide a majority, but I also utilize magic to hide some of the more obvious ones.”
“But they're so pretty!” Yuu whines but then backpedals. “I mean- If you feel more comfortable hiding them then go ahead, but I bet they're very pretty.”
“Glamor is common among the fae. Changing my skin takes little effort and is of little consequence.”
“You mean your makeup?”
“It is similar to that, yes.”
“Huh, well it's your face.” Yuu shrugs. “You can do want you want, but I bet you look cute with your scales out.”
And with that, the fae leans up and parts of his face shift, revealing small scales around his outer eyes, below and behind his ears, and along the back and sides of his neck. Yuu stares at Malleus, making the fae worry for a moment, until, suddenly, the human’s hands are on Malleus's cheeks.
“Holy shit!” Yuu squees as they look over Malleus's face. “How the fuck did you make yourself prettier!”
The dragon fae’s eyes are wide for a moment, the tips of his ears a light pink, and then he chuckles. “You are truly unique, child of man.”
“Me?” Yuu laughs. “You're the one with scales here! Just- look at how the light refracts off of them! They look black, but then the light bounces off and parts of them look purple!”
“Oh?” Malleus has never noticed that before.
“You even got little ones here too!” One of Yuu’s hands moves to Malleus's ear, fingers tracing the shell.
Malleus freezes then gulps. Yuu’s fingers run up the edge of his ear, pauses at the top, then runs back down to his lobe. Malleus buries his face back into Yuu’s chest. The tips of Malleus's ears burn red, he hopes Yuu doesn't notice.
“Ah, shit.” Yuu pulls their hand away. “Do you have sensitive ears? I should've asked.”
“It’s alright.” Malleus pulls away slightly and murmurs. “It felt nice. I do not mind you touching my ears.”
“You sure?”
“I would like for you to continue.” Malleus says with a thump coming after when his tail hits the floor.
“What? Want me to massage your ears and tail?” Yuu asks with a chuckle. “Need me to get your back too?”
“Yes, that should be adequate.”
Yuu laughs, brings both of their hands to Malleus's ears, and begins to rub them. Malleus lets out a deep sigh as he practically melts under the human’s touch. Yuu continues rubbing the dragon falls ears and and coos "If you want me to get your back, you're gonna need to move."
"No." Malleus hums into Yuu's chest. "Ears now. Focus on my ears."
"Alright, alright." Yuu chuckles. What Yuu doesn't know is just how intimate this is for fae. Touching a fae's ears is considered a very intimate activity done between mates because their ears are a major erogenous zone. At this point, Malleus isn't sure about his relationship with Yuu, but Yuu touching his ears feels right to him. The fae's eyes dilate as his breathing becomes heavier the more Yuu touches his ears. The end of Malleus's tails lightly thumps onto the floor again and again.
"I don't get it." Yuu moves one of their hands into Malleus's hair and runs their fingers down to feel the scales on his neck. "I don't get how people can be so scared of you when you're basically an oversized puppy but reptilian."
A deep vibration grumbles from Malleus's chest and he lifts himself up, facing Yuu. The whites of his eyes have turned a glowing green and more scales have appeared encasing most of his neck and shoulders. The thin tips of a forked tongue poke out from and slip back into his mouth.
Yuu cups both of Malleus's cheeks in their hands and smiles. "Just a big adorable boy."
The sound of ripping fabric startles Yuu for a moment as black wings begin to tear their way from the back of Malleus's night shirt and spread open. Yuu looks at them, eyes wide, as they reach out and touch the leathery skin.
"You are truly extraordinary, child of man."
"Says the man who just sprouted wings in front of me."
"But you do not look at me with fear. You do not look at me with an otherworldly reverence. When you look at me you..." Malleus rests his hand over the one against his cheek.
"Malmal." Yuu's face shifts to a look of worry. "You okay? You can talk to me if you want."
Malleus gazes at Yuu. There' so much he wants to say, but he hesitates.
"But-" Yuu adds. "If you don't feel like talking now, we can just keep cuddling, or do you want me to massage your tail? Or maybe your wings?"
Malleus smiles. "I would enjoy that."
~~Meanwhile~~
"Hornton is gonna kill my henchman!" Grim runs on all four into the Diasomnia dorm, screaming at the top of his lungs. He quickly gains the attention of some dorm members including Sebek and Lilia (who drags a sleeping Silver behind him).
"How dare you use such a name for the Young Master!" Sebek is screaming back. Silver finally wakes up from all of the screaming, so him and Lilia get Grim and Sebek to stop screaming and have Grim finally explain why he's there.
"I heard a ripping sound and woke up to see big wings and a pair of glowing eyes on top of my henchman. That prince of yours is going to eat them!"
"Oh?" Lilia coos with a smirk. "I don't think that will be happening, at least not the type you're thinking. Still, I have not had the talk yet with that boy, so maybe we should drop by before we're stuck with a political crisis."
With a quick teleportation spell, all four are just outside the Ramshackle Dorm. The door is slammed open to reveal a dragon (that is way too big to be in the common area) curled up, sleeping like a cat, with a little human laying across his snout and forehead, passed out with a smile on their face.
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poisonedjoinery · 4 months
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Hello beautiful, just wanted to thank for writing stories and giving us reader some of your time. I don't know if you are open for requests but I give it a try. 🤍🙏 I'm in desperate need of a voightx reader fic, angsty hurt and comfort and fluff. Maybe you like my idea or get some inspiration to write something similar.
The reader is working with intelligence and Voight is instantly taken aback by her appearance. She is also attracted to Hank. But they keep their feelings for each other hidden. One night the goes out for drinks and in their tipsy state the reader and Hank make out.... The next day Voight is giving her the silent treatment and is also cold and unfriendly to her, just ignoring the fact they kissed. His unfair behavior goes on for days until she gets him to talk to her, telling her that is was was mistake and she should move on leaves her feeling more hurt and heartbreak than ever. The situation is also taking a physically toll on her, with no appetite and her deathly sick appearance the team instantly worries.
We all know Voight would think he can't give her what she needs or be good enough fir this kind and beautiful girl.
Later on there's a guy hitting on her and Voight pushes her to date the stranger (secretly dying from jealousy, but believing another man can give her all she needs). The date ends catastrophic when she realizes that the guy drugged her, secretly and in panic she calls voight in her dizzy and weakening state and manages to tell him the bar they're currently. Not able to defend herself in her drugged state the guy is able to drag her to his car in the parking lot. She's struggling and fighting for her life, he gets frustrated and beat her up..... Voight comes just in time and keeps the guy from kidnapping her. Nearly conscious and beaten Hank takes her to his house to attend her injuries and to take care of her. Some fluffy end in which he admits his feelings for her... 🤍🙏
Currently I am sucker for caretaker fics, with sick and hurt reader. The intelligence team would be soo cute taking care and at a Hank Voight who hides his feelings and worries for the girl just get me 😍
I am soooo sorry for this long request, but I have this idea in my head since forever and I just needed it to share, in desperate hope a talented writer might create a good story. Don't hesitate to tell me if this sucks.
Lot's of love 🤍
Eat the World Raw
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Authors Notes: This is an anon request, of super protective yet jealous Voight. I hope I have done your request justice anon, my apologies for the serious delay on this I have a hideously busy job these days and I find it hard to find writing time.
Summary: Reader is a new starter on the Intelligence Unit, and is instantly taken with Voight. After sharing a drunken moment, Voight pushes reader away. But a panicked phone call changes everything.
Warnings: Mentions of drink spiking and assault. Angst and fluff too. If you feel there should be any other warnings, please do let me know.
Gif by: @shelby-love
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"Hey Boss, the new recruit is here." Antonio called out to Voight, as he walked you to your new desk. Dropping your bag to the side, you pulled off your coat.
"Thank you Detective, I appreciate your help." Smiling, Antonio nodded his head,
"Call me Tonio, everyone else does. Come on, we can get you some coffee, you're gonna need it." Nodding, you followed him to the break room. Tonio gave you the rundown of the most recent case the team was working on. A gang was currently running drugs through the city, and the intelligence unit was still unsure of how they were managing to go undetected.
"Wow... that sounds like a lot. You know, I worked a case once where a gang was using the postal service to distribute their drugs. The leaders brother used to work for them, and kept a master mailbox key." Antonio looked surprised,
"Huh... that... could actually be plausible."
"'TONIO!" Whipping his head round, he watched as Voight stalked in, a deep frown on his face.
"I thought you said the new starter was... here..." His voice trailed off as his gaze focused on you. You felt your breath leave you, as though you had been gut punched. You'd been told a lot about Voight, had been told what a hardass he was. Never taking no for an answer, scaring off more teammates and pissing off coworkers more than anyone else in the CPD. What you wasn't prepared for, was for how handsome he was. Yes, he was at least twenty years older than you but you couldn't help yourself, you let your eyes roam over him. From his boots, all the way to the black button down shirt with a black leather jacket over the top.
Clearing his throat, Antonio stepped forward.
"Boss this is (Y/N). I've already brought her up to speed with the case, and she's actually given a decent idea of how the drugs could be being moved around the city." Antonio frowned, looking at Voight, and then to you.
"Boss?"
"Huh... yeah?" Clearing his throat, Voight gave a tight smile and held out his hand.
"Nice to meet you (Y/N), glad you're all caught up." Averting his gaze, he rubbed the back of his neck.
"Uh... Tonio, I need you to run down a lead. It's the one that Ruzek brought us yesterday, take the newbie." Looking back up at you, he gave a small smile and quickly turned around heading back to his office.
"Um... he seems... intense." Your voice sounded shaky. You quickly took a large gulp of coffee, wincing as it scolded your throat.
"Yeah he um... I think he's a bit stressed right now." Tonio frowned, then quickly smiled.
"Okay, let's go." Striding back out, you grabbed your coat and badge. Risking a quick glance behind you, you saw Voight in his office watching you.
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The case took a nasty turn. The gang that was peddling drugs, seemed to have looped kids into their dealings. Picking the weak and neglected kids whose parents wouldn't give a shit as to their whereabouts. You kept your head down, working hard and not getting underfoot. Learning the ways and methods the team worked, but you could start to feel the pressure of this case sinking into your bones. You felt angry that innocent kids were being used, and made to believe that they were cared for. You rubbed your face, the night had settled around you causing the light from your screen to become harsh to your eyes.
"Hey (Y/N), it's late. Come on, we're all going for a drink." Glancing up, Halstead smiled from his desk as everyone else pulled on their coats, shutting down their computers. huffing out a sigh your stretched.
"Yeah sure... okay sounds good."
You all headed to Molly's, grabbing a booth in the back you sat and powered through a few beers. As the mood lightened, jokes started to fly around along with casual conversation. Soon you found yourself laughing at Ruzek and his ridiculous stories.
"There room for one more?" Glancing behind you, you found Voight staring down at you intently. Swallowing hard, you nodded and shifted your chair over.
"Sure thing Boss." Voight grabbed a chair and sat next to you.
"Thanks, and when we're not on shift, you can call me Hank." Smiling, you took a sip of your drink. Feeling more confident, mainly because of the ten or so beers flowing through you, you leant in closer to Voight.
"Thanks. So... Hank... how has your day been?" Smiling, Hank watched you for a moment, then lent in further.
"Well it has been busy... but I think we are making good progress, and the drinks are certainly helping right now." With that he took a large gulp of bourbon, causing a colour to rise in his cheeks.
The night continued, with the team drinking and laughing. The more you drank, you found yourself relaxing into your seat which incidentally lead to you leaning further into Hank. You enjoyed the warmth that came from him, the smell of his cologne, the deep laugh that vibrated out of his chest. You tried not to squirm as you felt yourself becoming flushed with excitement.
"Okay guys... I need to get to bed. I'd like it to be at least a month before I drunkenly embarrass myself. " The others laughed and jeered, trying to persuade you to stay as you pulled on your coat.
"I'm gonna head off too, (Y/N) I'll walk you out." Waving bye to everyone, you headed to the door, your mind racing at the thought of Hank being so close behind you. Rummaging in your bag you found your phone, pulling up a taxi app.
"How you getting home?" Looking up, you smiled and showed him your phone.
"I was going to get a cab."
"Ah, don't worry about that I'll give you a ride. Come on."
"Oh you don't have to..."
"I know I don't have to, but I want to. It's late and I can at least know you're safe." Dropping your phone back into your bag, you pulled your jacket closer around you.
"Then lead the way Boss." Smirking at him, as he raised an eyebrow, he lead you across the street to his truck. Climbing in, you sank into a soft leather chair. The air was heavy with Hanks smell, and coffee.
"So... where do you live?" Shutting the door behind him, Hank started the truck and turned on the heater. Giving him your address, you pulled your seatbelt on. The drive was quiet, but not uncomfortable. Hank maneuvered the truck smoothly through the light city traffic, occasionally asking you questions about your previous jobs. Before you knew it, you were outside your house. Stopping the truck, he placed his arm behind your chair, quietly watching you.
"Thank you, Voight. I appreciate the lift."
"You're welcome sweethear'." You felt a heat creep over your face at the endearment. You dropped your gaze not wanting him to see.
"Well um... goodnight. I..." Before you could finish your sentence, Hank had tilted your face up, his hand remaining under your jaw.
"Just... a taste." You blinked and felt as his lips pressed against yours. Moaning quietly, you reached your hand up grazing the back of his neck. Pulling him in closer to you. You're not sure at what point it happened, but you ended up pulled into Hanks lap, slowly kissing him for what felt like hours. Humming quietly, he pressed his head against yours.
"I um... I should probably go. I need to be fresh for tomorrow... I don't want my boss to get pissed at me." Smiling, Hank let you shift out of his lap and into the passenger seat again.
"I'll see you tomorrow."
"Bright and early boss." Climbing out you headed into your house, Hank remaining outside until you had locked your front door. Hank rubbed his face and pulled his truck out onto the main road. What the fuck had he done.
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The next morning Hank got to the office bright and early. He didn't want to be disturbed by anyone. This case was starting to piss him off, and he didn't want to fuck around chasing any more dead beat leads. He noticed as the rest of the team trickled in, all of them having a haggard look that suggested they'd all drunk a bit too much last night. He noticed how you watched him through the blinds of his office, like you was waiting for him to call you in for a chat. He probably should talk to you, but he just couldn't do it right now. He was too pissed at himself to even consider having a civilised conversation.
He made sure he kept busy for the rest of the day, he didn't want to speak to anyone unless needed. He chased down lead after lead until he managed to find one that was promising. After ten hours, and a painful conversation with a local informant, Voight managed to track the ring leader down and haul him and his gang into lockup. He left Antonio and Burgess shutting down the lab, and bagging up evidence.
"(Y/N), with me." nodding quickly, you followed Voight out into the stations car park.
"I'm sorry about last night, I shouldn't have... I shouldn't have kissed you."
"I didn't mind Hank, I actually enjoyed..."
"No... it won't be happening again. I am too old for you, and I won't be able to give you anything that you want. So it's best to just... forget about it okay." It killed him to see the pain and hurt in your eyes.
"Hank I..."
"It was a mistake (Y/N), okay?" He didn't meant to raise his voice, but he saw the anger building in you.
"Not a problem Boss, I've already forgotten." Watching you march back into the building, he groaned inwardly, kicking himself for his tactless approach.
For the next few weeks, Voight watched as you worked alongside the team, effortlessly working leads and solving case after case. He couldn't stand how pale you had become, how when everyone else had lunch you seemed to find a reason not to eat with them.
"(Y/N), eat something will you. I don't want you passing out on shift." Whipping your head round, you glared at Voight as he stalked past you. Grinding your teeth, you forced yourself to answer.
"Sir." Grabbing your coat, you nodded to 'Tonio.
"I'm heading out for some food, want anything?" 'Tonio shook his head,
"Na I'm good, thanks (Y/N)." Nodding, you headed out.
You didn't realise how hungry you were until you were half way through a footlong sub from the local deli. Your stomach ached in protest and delight at the amount of food you were consuming. You couldn't help but think about how Voight had kissed you that night, it had felt glorious. You hadn't dated anyone for a few years, hadn't really had the time. You'd enjoyed your job too much. But when Voight had kissed you, you felt a new rush, a new thrill. Then the fucker had ditched you.
"Asshole." Throwing your rubbish in the bin, you headed back into the office. Taking the stairs two at a time, you wasn't focused on the people around you and you slammed into someone.
"Shit... I'm sorry I wasn't watching." Glancing up you found a guy in front of you smiling.
"(Y/N)! Christ I haven't seen you in years." Focusing on the face attached to the voice, you saw it was Jacob. A guy you had gone through the academy with. Huffing out a breath, you gave a wane smile.
"Hey, Jacob. How you doing?" Nodding, he grinned, stepping closer to you.
"Yeah I'm good thanks, I'm working over with homicide now."
"Sweet." You shifted your gaze, looking up to where you wanted to go. He glanced behind you, eyes going wide.
"Are you... you up in Intelligence?"
"uh-huh."
"Holy shit that is amazing, I've heard Voight is a right hardass... is that true?"
"I can be when pushed." Jacobs eyes widened as he spun round.
"Um... sorry Sir, I didn't mean anything by it." Smirking Voight clapped him on the shoulder,
"Don't sweat it. (Y/N), when you're ready we've got a lead to run down." Turning, Voight headed up the stairs to the rest of the team.
"I should head up." Moving to follow Voight, Jacob caught your arm.
"Hey do you fancy grabbing a drink tonight, after work?" Glancing up the stairs you saw Voight had slowed down, probably trying to over hear your conversation.
"Um... yeah I'll uh... I'll let you know. Big case, not sure what time I'll be finished."
"Yeah... yeah okay sounds good." Heading up the stairs, you caught Voights eye.
"Hey... you dating that guy?" Frowning, you glanced up at him.
"I... no I went through the academy with him. He just asked if I wanted to meet for a drink."
"Hmm... you should go. You're a young woman, you should get out from behind the desk." Watching him closely, you leaned in looking for any hint of a joke.
"You... okay sure, why not." Turning on your heel you marched into the office heading straight to your desk to phone Jacob. If Voight insisted you go, then you'll go. If only you'd turned round, you'd have seen the fury burning in his eyes.
-------------------------------------------
Checking your reflection, you smiled. You'd picked your best emerald green dress, it dipped low at the front and hugged at your hips just right. You felt good for the first time in a while.
"Forget Voight." Grabbing your coat and bag, you headed out the door.
You found Jacob at the bar sipping on a beer, spotting you he grinned.
"Wow... you look amazing!" Grinning, you pulled your coat off and placed it over the bar stool.
"Thank you, you scrub up well yourself." Gesturing to the bartender, you ordered a red wine.
"Cheers." Taking a big sip you smiled. You looked around the bar, seeing all the different people chatting and drinking. You felt yourself relax a bit into your seat.
"So... how's your case going?" Looking up, you were stalled for moment.
"Uh... yeah it's going okay. It's a tough case but we're getting there." You didn't overly want to chat about work, as it reminded you of Voight. Jacob seemed to get the hint as you didn't expand any further on the subject. You sat quietly for a moment, just sipping on your drink. After a while, you both seemed to just relax into a conversation, reliving the academy days minutes passing into hours.
"You feeling okay?" Jacobs voice seemed to pull you out of a blurred moment that you didn't remember going into.
"Hmm? oh... yeah I'm fine, I'm just... gonna head to the bathroom okay?" Smiling, he nodded.
"Okay, well uh... shall we head out after this? Maybe find somewhere to get food?" Standing up, you nodded holding onto your chair for dear life.
"Yeah that's fine." Grabbing your bag, you headed to the bathroom, feeling your legs wobble and your head start to swirl. Pulling in a deep breath, you focused on the toilet door, not wanting to look more drunk than you were.
Pushing open the door, you leant on the sink and stared at your reflection. Your pupils looked blown, but you couldn't tell. You couldn't focus. You tried to remember how many drinks you'd had, tried to remember anything but it was all becoming a hazy dream.
"Shit.." Stumbling into a toilet stall, you locked the door behind you and rummaged in your bag pulling out your phone. You truly hoped you'd punched in the right number.
"(Y/N)?" Hanks voice cut through the phone, relief flooded through you.
"Han..k... I need... come help... been drugged."
"Where are you!" You felt yourself slowly drifting off.
"I... I'm ... bar...South side... bird...bird... Spar..." Your voice drifted off,
"Bird... the Sparrow... you at the Sparrow!"
"Yea... bathro." Your world went black.
Voight drove like a madman, sirens blaring not caring who he cut off in the process. Hold on, please god hold on. The streets were a blur as they flashed past him in a haze of lights and noise. Pulling into the car park, Voight spotted a guy hauling a woman to his car. Stepping out, he recognised it as Jacob. Picking up his pace, he started towards him catching your voice as he got closer.
"No... get off you sick fuck."
"Stop struggling... you know you're going to love it." Hank watched as you swung at him catching him in the mouth, but it didn't stop there. Jacob slapped you, and punched you in the stomach. Hank was at his back within seconds. Grabbing him by the hair, he slammed his face into the side of the car, continuing to punch him as he slid to the ground. He wouldn't have stopped, could have killed him had it not been for your voice calling to him.
"Hank..." Looking behind him, he saw you stirring on the floor blood pouring from your mouth.
"Shit... (Y/N), I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Scooping you up, he carried you to his car putting you in the passenger seat. Peeling out of the car park, he sped away from the bar. Glancing over at you he took your hand,
"Hey, (Y/N) stay awake alright. We're nearly there." You let your head lull to the side, the warm air from the heater and the blow to the head making you sleepy.
"Where's there?" you murmured out.
"Home."
-------------------------------------------
Waking up, your head felt heavy, your vision blurred. Rubbing a hand over your face, you realised you no longer had your dress on but a soft t-shirt with the letter CPD stamped on the chest. Your body ached, and yet you felt content in the soft confines of the duvet.
"Hmm... s'good."
"(Y/N)?" Glancing to the side, you found Voight sitting in a chair next to your bed.
"Hey, um... what am I doing here?" Reaching out, Voight took your hand and held onto it gently.
"You rang me last night, you went out for a drink with the Jacob guy and ah... he um... he spiked your drink." Frowning, you tried to remember but all you could think of was the toilet stall you had sat in.
"I got there just as he was dragging into his car, but you resisted and uh.. he hit you a few times."
"I um... christ I don't remember much I'm sorry Boss. Guess that's why my head hurts hmm?"
"What! No, don't be sorry, that scumbag is the one who should be sorry not you! I'm... I'm just glad I was able to get you out before... well I'm glad I got to you." Smiling you squeezed his hand with yours,
"Thanks Boss."
"'Tonio checked into your boy, and he's not a cop, well not any more at least. He didn't make it passed being a beat cop, he assaulted two women so he got fired." You felt your stomach churn.
"Well... maybe next time I should get you guys to run a background check on whoever I plan on going for a drink with hmm?" Dropping your head back into the pillow you winced as pain flared through your eyes. Looking around the room, you saw that it was rather warm and, oddly enough, cosy.
"We won't need to do that." Voight sounded a little nervous, something you had never thought he could be. Tilting your head, you gazed at him intently,
"And why's that hmm?"
"Because I'm not a creep who preys on women, so you'll be safe."
"Wha..?" Sighing, he shifted out of his chair to sit on the edge of the bed, running his other hand over your hair. It only occured to you now that this was Hanks house, Hanks bedroom, Hanks shirt that you were wearing.
"I shouldn't have encouraged you to go on a date with that guy. What I should have done, was date you myself. But instead I... I got nervous. Nervous that you'd see I wasn't anything but an old, beat up cop too stuck in his ways to make you happy in the ways that matter." Sitting yourself up, you leaned into Voight and kissed him. You wasn't sure how long it lasted, or when he had gently pushed you back leaning into you. Running your hands up his arms, you traced your fingers over his broad back. Breaking away, you pressed your head against his,
"You know, you never even asked what makes me happy. If you'd had just asked, I think we would have saved a lot of time... and spiked drinks." Smirking at him, he shook his head.
"Yeah I know, I'm a dumbass." Laughing at him, you brushed your hand over his jaw.
"I'll let you off, on one condition." Voight raised an eyebrow, and hummed quietly.
" You um... take these jeans off and stay in bed with me for the day hmm?"
"Yes Ma'am, you don't have to ask me twice." Standing he slowly unbuckled his belt, and unbuttoned the jeans. You felt a heat build in your face and stomach. This was going to be... an interesting day.
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luvfy0dor · 7 months
Note
fyodor angst to fluff pls(reader scolds him for overworking then he gets mad so she gets sad so he feels bad basically 🐀)
"Breaks are good ♡" Fyodor Dostoevsky x GN!Reader !! ༉‧₊˚.
╰┈➤ Fyodor Dostoevsky ♡
Description; Fyodor is stubborn most times when it comes to putting a stop to his work, but if it's something his lover wants so badly for him, he might as well comply, right?
Warnings; Spoilers for Fyodors motive/DOA plan, angst, Idk if this counts as soft!Fyodor help
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A/N; Sorry this took a couple days to put out, it's been quite a week dawg 🫥writing this out was like a retreat y'all don't even know
Fyodor had always been a man dedicated to his work, but you can't help feeling like sometimes he gets a little sucked into his task. Fyodor himself even knows it, though he will swear up and down that the amount of work he does is highly necessary. Every time he tries excuses his excessive working, you just sigh and shake your head. This time was different though, you were fed up.
Fyodor had a little room for himself, dedicated to his plan of ridding ability users from the world, that he would hole himself in to keep his focus. He didn't forbid you from entering, but he highly influenced you not to while he was hard at work. He didn't mind when you brought him tea or anything, but he got remotely ticked off when you would urge him to take a break or come to bed, insisting on another thirty minutes or so. Tonight, you decided that he needed to implement a habit of taking a break, he had to be exhausted, right?
You carefully stirred the tea that you made for Fyodor, walking slowly towards his little room. You gently knocked on the door, hearing a soft and muttered "come in" from the other side. When you opened the door, Fyodors eyes were still glued on the screens in front of him. You let out a soft sigh as you walked towards him, setting the tea in front of the man.
"Thank you, my dear." He said with a soft smile, grabbing your hand gently and kissing your knuckles. Your heart swelled a bit at his gentle action, but it only made you crave more attention from your boyfriend. "Uhm, fedya, I was thinking..." He sighed. "I already know what you were thinking, no. I need to get this done." He says firmly, his smile fading to a more neutral expression. You felt a small pang in your heart, a frown coming over your face.
"Come on, Fyodor. I can't keep letting you sit here and work yourself to death. It's all you do, work, work, work, and some more work." You said, a hint of annoyance in your voice, to which he side eyed you. "My dear, you clearly don't understand. Can we talk about this later? When I'm finished?" He says, his tone also slightly irritated. Your eyebrows furrow.
"No, Fyodor. We're not going to ignore this, are you not exhausted? Constantly working, you barely have time for me, let alone yourself! All I ask is that you take a break here and there, is it really that difficult?" You practically pleaded with the lanky man in front of you. He seemed as though he couldn't be bothered with your concerns, too irked by your constant insistence on him stepping away from his job for a while to even care.
He sighed heavily, swiveling his chair to face you. "You act as though you're the one doing the work. A break is unnecessary if I can just do it all in one sitting. That prolongs the ultimate time it takes me to get it done, don't you get that?" He replied, his thumb and pointer finger squeezing the bridge of his nose.
"Yes, but you're still overworking yourself! You do too much in such little time, you need to stop for a minute. Your work is like a plague to you, it consumes you entirely in the worst way possible." He rolls his eyes. "You're quite dramatic." He says, returning his attention to his screens. You felt hurt by Fyodors ignorance, furrowing your eyebrows and balling up your fists a bit.. "Wow, okay. You don't even care, do you?" You mutter. He takes a glance over at you before continuing his typing.
You sigh loudly before angrily speaking. "Why do you get so defensive every time I try to get you to take a break? There's no way you're not utterly exhausted will all of this, Fyodor." You desperately say, you voice cracking a bit as you try to get your point across to Fyodor. "You're only distracting me and wasting more time." He says, making your heart sink. "Wow, alright." You say angrily, your voice a bit shaky as you storm out of the room, slamming the door behind you.
You truly didn't get it, what was his problem with taking a quick break? It wasn't killing him, or anyone for that matter. There were so many reasons why a break is necessary; you knew his line of work was dangerous and put him directly in deaths way if he wasn't cautious, and had he died you would absolutely regret not pestering him. He could very much be overworking himself, raising his irritability and lack of energy. What you didn't understand was why he couldn't see the issue with his bad habit.
Tears pricked at your eyes as you marched your way back to the shared bedroom you and Fyodor had occupied every night; angrily crawling under the covers and huffing as you settled into a comfortable position, facing away from the door. You stirred with your angry thoughts, not even wanting to get water just because of the thought of running into your boyfriend. You were so mad that he wouldn't just be understanding of your side too, you genuinely wondered what had crawled up his ass tonight. I mean, is it seriously that difficult to just hear you out?-
"My dear..? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you like that."
His soft voice sounded throughout the bedroom, making your mind go quiet for a moment. You let out a small 'huff' to let him know you were awake, but still disgruntled over the whole conundrum. He sighed in response, quietly shutting the door behind him and cutting off any light from the hallway. You could feel the blanket lifting and the mattress dipping next to you.
"Did you want to talk about it..?" He quietly murmurs, trying to keep you calm as he spoke. You rolled over, sniffling and wiping any stray tears that had overflowed from your eyes. "Please don't cry, moya lyubov.." he says, his face seeming expressionless, but you could tell there was a smidge of guilt behind his pretty, purple eyes. You averted your eyes from his, your mouth hanging slightly agape as you gathered your thoughts.
"I just...Fyodor, you're gonna work yourself to death before you even get within arms reach of your goal." You say with a small frown. He just sighs, snaking one of his arms around your side to comfort you a bit. "I understand that you feel that way, but it's important that I get there as soon as possible." He says, using his other hand to brush some hair out of your face. You nod a bit. "Yeah...I guess you're right, but...could you please just start to take breaks? Just...you know, just five to ten minutes every couple of hours?"
He thinks for a moment before reluctantly nodding. "I suppose I could, but only because my health seems to be so important to my love." He says softly, gently kissing your forehead. You smile, kissing his shoulder in response. "Good, I get nervous that one day you'll...you know, die and I won't have as much time with you to look back on as I would like to." You murmur against the soft fabric of his sweater, hearing him hum in acknowledgement.
"That's understandable, dear." He sleepily says, stroking your back as he rests his head on top of yours. Your hand goes up to twirl some of his long, dark hair around your pointer finger, observing his tired mannerisms. "Fedya, look at you, you're falling asleep already." You let out a soft laugh, as real of a problem it was that Fyodor was overworking himself, he looked kinda silly all drowsy and sleepy.
A soft smile tugs at the corners of Fyodors lips. "Yes, you're right. I guess you do know me pretty well, don't you, my dear?" He murmurs, his eyes closed. You smile with your boyfriend and continue twirling his hair around you're finger. "Ofcourse I do, and I know that you need some time for yourself."
"Alright, I will take a break next time, I promise." He mumbles, falling asleep in your arms with yet another goal in mind; completing all of his goals healthily.
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kingofbodyrolls · 5 months
Text
BTS fic recs: November 2023
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I want to thank each and every writer on this list for creating such wonderful stories and art - you are truly amazing ✨ All the fics on this list hold a dear place in my heart 🥹
❗Most of these fics are smutty as hell, so minors dni.❗ 
If you read anything on this list and you like it, please leave a comment to the writer or reblog the original fic’s post to let them know that they’re appreciated 💜 And if you want more fic recs you can follow me to stay updated 🙂
BTS fic rec index → May | Jun | Jul | Aug | Sep (jjk)(knj) | Oct (pjm) | 💜 (*) | Dec (ksj)(kth) |
Emoji meaning → angst = 🌩️, smut = 🥵, fluff = 🥰, comedy = 😂, yandere = 😈, thriller/dark = 👻, personal favorites = 💯.
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Namjoon
⭐Friend or Fuck by @joonsmagicshop [8K] // knj x f.reader // f2l // 🥵
📝 A drunken night leads to a good morning.
🗨️ I really liked this 🥺 Namjoon was just so sweet, caring and gentle with OC. Really loved it 👏🏾 but why, oh why did Jungkook have to cockblock them 😂 I wanted the smut alright! The build up was so good, I was slightly frustrated with the ending 🙈 yes I’m a slut for smut okay 🙈 I’m hoping for a part two ✌🏾🙏🏾💜
⭐Emotions of the Soul 💯by @oddinary4bts [36.6K] // knj x f.reader // idol!au, childhood/teenage lovers to s2l2l // 🥵🌩️🥰
📝 When Namjoon reappears in your life after thirteen years of absence, you find yourself unsure of what he means to you, and of what you mean to him. Anxiety reigns over you, but will it be enough to drag you away from Kim Namjoon?
🗨️ This is another masterpiece from Ella! She is incredible at writing idol!au’s that just feels so goddamn natural and real 👏 The way Namjoon is written is just perfection and OC with her struggles, and they are goddamn human, yes – and that’s one of the beautiful parts in it!!! 😭I also reminded me of my own teenage breakup (gosh I was stupid back then, but not because of the breakup lol 😂). Anyway, please go and read it! As with everything Ella write, this is another to add to my favorites 💜
Seokjin
Nothing this month 😞
Yoongi
⭐Workaholic 💯by @hobiwonder [10K] // myg x f.reader // “‘strangers” to lovers (I don’t want to spoil!) // 🥵😂🥰
📝 Yoongi needs to relax and Hoseok has many tricks up his sleeve to make him. None of them Yoongi thought included hiring a hooker to pay him a visit one stormy night. 
🗨️ Wow okay, this was so freaking great! Like, what??? Incredible! A masterpiece! I really really loved it 🥺 everything was so fucking good, their chemistry, the tense build up ugh, so fucking good! 💯 ✨
⭐Little bit of your Heart by @yoongiofmine [wordcount loading…] // myg x f.reader, jjk x f.reader // exes!au, fwb!au // 🥵
📝 You had everything you could ever dream of; the career of your dreams as a music producer, the best friends you could ever wish for, and a exes-turned-friends-turned-fuck-buddies relationship with Min Yoongi. You knew you and Yoongi would never move past that and you were okay with it. Until a friend from your past comes back into your life, offering to give you everything you deserve, everything Yoongi couldn’t. Will Jungkook show you what you’ve been missing? Or will the new guy threaten Yoongi enough to do something about it? 
🗨️ Yes here we go a new series from Ella! ✨ Yoongi already seems so done with Jungkook and they have barely spoken 😂 looking forward to how that develops 🤭
⭐What the Moon Saw + Stolen Tides 💯by @violetsiren90 // myg x f.reader // non-idol!au, f2l // 🥵🥰🌩️
📝 In the words of the great Stevie Nicks, "Time makes you bolder, even children get older, and I'm getting older too."
🗨️ This is just so fucking beautiful. Everything. About. It. Period. 😭 It is emotional, it is young love, and it is tender and loving - like, Yoongi is just so sweet. Their timing sucks, but thankfully Violet wrote a beautiful drabble to give the couple a lovely ending! 💜 Truly, please go read it, it is so good I was crying and felt so good after, it’s sweet – OKAY I’M SOFT I know.
Hoseok
⭐Flight 18 💯by @noona-la-la-la [9.5K] // jhs x f. reader // flight!au, idol!au // 🥵😂
📝 Korean Air Flight 18 leaves daily from Los Angeles traveling to Seoul.  You’ve taken this flight before, but this time you’ve got an irritating passenger in the neighboring seat.  Little did you know that he would end up giving you the ride of your life.
🗨️ This was just really really amazing; utterly funny (like I was laughing at certain points), so much sexual tension that evolves into satisfying smut 😗
Jimin
⭐The Airport Couple: P[ass]anger from Hell + Drabble 💯by @dovechim & @jimlingss [8K] // pjm x f.reader // e2l, frequent traveler jimin x tsa agent reader // 😂😂😂🥰
📝 As a TSA agent, you expect your job to be relatively easy, most passengers these days follow the rules to the T in order to avoid prolonging their custom checks. But not a certain Park Jimin, who seems to have a problem understanding what 100ml is, or the very simple fact that gadgets must be taken out of the bag, and bomb jokes are strictly off limits. Frequent traveller Park Jimin is your nemesis, but darn is he a cute one.
🗨️ This is just so fucking hilarious, don’t get me started. I laughed from beginning to end 😂 And it’s still as good as I remember, if not even better??? Like ✨ I’ve highlighted a few of my favorite parts from the fic. I don’t want to give too much away, but these lines are just so damn hilarious! Please go read it, it’s one of my faves 💯
⭐The Airport Couple: Park Jimin’s Cock[pit] 💯by @jimlingss & @dovechim [12K] // pjm x f.reader // pilot!au, bf2l, coworkers!au // 😂🥰🥵
📝 Talk about Angry Birds, and most people would immediately think of the mobile game app. But within your circle of friends, it stands for something else. It’s synonymous with Park Jimin, one of the most talented pilots from your batch who also just happens to have anger issues, or in other words, air rage. He is your best friend, but when you get teamed up with him as his co-pilot, you can only pray that things don’t go south… literally. 
🗨️ I remember reading this a few years ago, and I loved it then and I still do ✨ It is incredibly funny, has good banter and dialogue to match. The chemistry between reader and Jimin is just priceless, their friendship is just pure giggles 🥹 It’s also fluffy and will tug on your heartstrings in the best way possible. Just really, really good and definitely also one of my all-time favorites 💯💜
⭐Flowers & Sex by @7deadlysinsfics [4.5K] // pjm x f.reader // fwb, f2l au, pwp // 🥰🥵🌩️
📝 You’re in need of a warm body and a good fuck. who better than your friend park jimin?
🗨️ Just really cute 🥺 Hoseok (readers ex in this) is a douche though, like why did she have to go back to him ugh 🥴 but I like how the story developed and reader realized her feelings after she took her ex back. Loved Jimin and how he gave her flowers 💐 he was so fucking cute 🥺🌸
⭐Heaven with You by @acc3ssdenied [4.7K] // pjm x f.reader // friends to ??? // 🥵
📝 All good things happen after 2 am - at least, that was what you believed. Whoever thought it was a good idea for a group of twelve young adults to play drunk truth or dare obviously agreed with you.
🗨️ Oh this was some filthy smut 🥵 And that kiss with Taehyung was downright slutty – a really good pwp 🥵
⭐Have some Respect by @chim-chimmie [4.2K] // pjm x f.reader // school/college!au, teacher!jimin // 🥵
📝 Your teacher Park Jimin has had enough of you disrespecting him, so he taught you a little lesson.
🗨️ Okay, okay, I know the teacher x student dynamic is a touchy subject, and not always well executed, but hear me out, alright. This was so freaking sinful, like my soul needs to take a shower now??? 🥵
⭐Rush by @bangtanfanfiction [4K] // pjm x f.reader // idol!jimin // 🥵🥰
📝 After not seeing your boyfriend for several weeks, his latest performance definitely made something in you snap. And at a award show of all things.
🗨️ A good pwp with smut that is 🔥
⭐How Long? by @jiminniethemarshmallow [4K] // pjm x f.reader // established relationship // 🥵🥰
📝 No summary!
🗨️ I also remember reading this a few years ago and it’s still so fucking hot and filthy 🥵
⭐Turbulence by @yminie [9.3K] // pjm x f.reader // flight!au // 🥵🥰
📝 On your first flight the cute boy next to you helps to sooth your nerves, and on the second flight he soothes something else.
🗨️ Gosh, I remember reading this a few years back and I’ve actually read it multiple times, it’s just so incredible 👏🏾 the smut is freaking hot, and Jimin is just 🤯 well, he’s being a sweet fluffball, but then a smexy God 🥵 like wtf! The duality is insane! One of my favorites and I’m looking forward to rereading part two ✨💜
⭐Accelerate by @yminie [8.9K] // pjm x f.reader // flight!au // 🥵🥰
📝 Jimin comes to retrieve his jacket on the condition that you then accompany him for dinner, and you can bet he satiates every hunger.
🗨️ I haven’t re-read this yet – but I remember I loved it 💜(I’ll insert my rec here when I have read it again).
Taehyung
Nothing this month 😞
Jungkook
⭐Love à Trois [series; ongoing] by @letjungcoook7 [13.1K] // jjk x f.reader x pjm // slice of life, f2l+s2l, roommates!au, college!au, love triangle // 🥵🌩️
📝 You and Jimin secretly have feelings for each other, you both realize your dream of studying at the same college and sharing an apartment, but when financial issues start to arise, you have to seek a third roommate. and guess who fate sends your way? Jungkook, the same guy who took your virginity back in high school.
🗨️ This is really good! There’s two chapters up so far and they are really good! It’s so interesting to see the love triangle unfold. Really enjoyed this 🌸 It’s just getting better and better ✨ I really loved the backstory of how both Jimin and OC realized they had feelings for each other 🥺 so good and really looking forward to the next chapter 😍
⭐Sweet Obsession by @letjungcoook7 [2.5K] // jjk x f.reader // established relationship, plussize!reader // 🥵🥰
📝 When a coworker starts to show interest in you, your boyfriend becomes jealous.
🗨️ Whaaaaaaaat 🥹This was so incredibly sweet and tender! As a plus-sized curvy girl, this was such a good and lovely read 💖 Another banger from Lua💜
⭐The Wedding Planners 💯by @gukyi [28K] // jjk x f.reader // e2l, wedding!au // 😂🥰🌩️🥵
📝 Jeon jungkook is three things: cocky, terrible, and your worst enemy. then your best friend hoseok gets engaged to the love of his life, and suddenly jeon jungkook is four things: cocky, terrible, your worst enemy, and the man you will be spending the next seven months with in order to plan your best friend’s wedding. 
🗨️ I also remember reading this a few years ago and it was just a very funny and pleasant reread 💜 What I love about this is one, is definitely the slow-burn and the enemies to lovers aspect too. The banter between reader and Jungkook is just so priceless and reading how their relationship slowly unfolds and develops through the months of the wedding planning was just everything 💯 Hoseok and Yoongi’s personality in this also makes this fic truly amazing.
⭐Fragment of the Past (1)(2)(3) [series; completed] 💯by @ctrlsht [28.1K] // jjk x f.reader // patient!jk x psychiatrist!reader // 🌩️😈👻🥵
📝 You are a well-known and respected psychiatrist and author. You start treating Jungkook, who suffers from PTSD after surviving an extremely traumatic incident. As you help him confront his traumatic past, he begins to act strangely, and you start uncovering something about him that will change everything.
🗨️ Another first for me, with the thriller vibes and damn it delivers on that! It’s really, really good 👏 Pacing is really good and how we see more and more of Jungkook’s disturbing traits is just brilliant ✨If you want my full review of it, you can find it here (it does contain spoilers though!). And I really think you shouldn’t spoil it! Just go read it if you’re into the darker stuff, because my heart was racing so damn fast! This is the best thriller yandere au I’ve read to date 💜
⭐Lost on You by @letjungcoook7 [2.1K] // jjk x f.reader // established relationship // 🥵
📝 You're just so obsessed with your boyfriend. you would do anything for him.
🗨️ Ehm excuse me Lua, mirror sex???? 🥵 Fucking hell that was a hot one, like I almost feel like I need to take a shower 😂 another banger from you! And the dirty talking too, aish 🥵 💖
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OMG November has truly been an exceptional month! There was my 30th birthday of course, and then I received so my love for my series ‘friendcation’ that I was crying with all the beautiful words and reviews I got 😭 I am so thankful for every one of you, whether you interact with my fic recs or my own – thank you! 💜
Borahae 💜
381 notes · View notes
enkas-illusion · 5 months
Text
One of Your Guys
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One of Your Guys - Part 2/3
Fandom / Pairing: Jujutsu Kaisen / Choso x f!reader
Rating: NSFW/Explicit - MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
Content Warning: Fluff, smut (oral, f.receiving), language, hurt/comfort, angst (kinda?), friends to lovers
Chapter Summary: Sorting out your feelings always feels like a nightmare, but it becomes a lot more bearable when your flatmate plays cupid to help you with it.
Author’s Note: This is a long ass chapter lol, could’ve split it in two but I wanted to commit to the 3-part story thing. Enjoy!
(P.S. Will probably post Part 3 this Saturday... I had a lot of fun writing it, to say the least)
Song Dedication: Those Eyes by New West / Carry Me Home by Jorja Smith & Maverick Sabre
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
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“Fuck… yes, right there,” you moan as you look down between your thighs. Choso’s eyes look up at you as he eats you out with a steady pace – sucking and licking at your pussy just as you like it.
Your legs shake as you chant his name on repeat. Your hands roam down to tug at his jet black hair, your back arching off the bed. The wet sound of his mouth against your core has the adrenaline rushing to your head, keeping you from thinking straight.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, almost there. Just a little bit more.
“Satoru… I’m clos-'' your words get caught in your throat as you look down with a blurry vision. The man between your legs stills his movement and sits up to move away from you.
“Satoru?” Choso lets out a chuckle in disbelief, “Is that who you belong to?” 
You open your mouth to talk but it feels like you’ve lost your voice and no matter how hard you try to speak, you simply can’t. Panic sets in and as if on cue, an incessant buzzing sound rings in your ears from your bedside table. As soon as you turn to the side to shut it off, your hand accidentally hits the edge of the table. 
Ouch.
That’s how you wake up the next day, in cold sweat and even more delirious than the night before. What the fuck was that? It’s as if your own mind is out to get you.
So much for wanting emotional clarity in the morning.
You grab the bottle from the side table, taking big gulps of water, almost emptying the entire thing before returning it back to its place. You tap on your phone to check the time – 02:54 PM – you’d slept in all through the morning.
Leaving your bed lazily, you walk towards the window to open the curtains slowly and let the light in. You’re glad the sun isn’t too harsh even though it’s late into the afternoon. You stretch a bit to release the stiffness in your body and your stomach growls. You’d barely eaten since last night, so naturally, you find yourself craving enough food to feed 10 people.
Feelings can wait, you decide, food can’t.
Just as you begin your walk to the kitchen, your doorbell rings and you reroute your steps to get the door instead. Just as you reach the door, the bell rings again.
“Patience, jezz!” you groan as you open the door. Before you’ve even opened it halfway, your flatmate barges in with her travel bags, dropping them to the floor as she gives you a bear hug.
“Miss me? It’s okay mama’s hereee.” Mia says in a sing-song tone as she squeezes and shakes you in her arms. You want to tease her and say no but this feels so comforting that you simply laugh as you nod your head and hug her back.
When she pulls away from you and observes you as you close the door, she states, “Wow, you look like shit, what happened?”
“I missed you real bad.” you say dryly. She gives you a stare down and in an effort to change the topic, you add, “Weren’t you returning in the evening?”
She places her bags near the foot of the sofa and drops to the sofa with her whole body weight. She moves to make some space when you sit next to her.
“Evening… afternoon… same thing… besides I had t-,” she pauses midway as she stares at you with wide eyes and your eyebrows knit together in confusion. Your eyes widen back at her when you see she’s not exactly staring at your face.
“Hold on, what the fuck is that???” she half yells, pointing at your hickey in sync with you slapping both your hands to your neck in a poor attempt to cover the entire area. 
Right, the hickeys. You weren’t actively aware that other people could see them, partly because, well… even you hadn’t registered everything from the previous night into your brain in a sane, rational, comprehensible manner. 
“Don’t tell me… Satoru?” she gasps as she leans forward to pull your hand away to inspect the mark near your collarbone. “To be honest, I didn’t think you had it in you to confess-”
“No… it’s not Satoru…” you say as you avoid her gaze and almost mumble the next part, “...Choso did that.”
“WHAT THE FUCK?” her eyes widen again as she squeals. Disbelief and amusement written all over her face. “Details! I want DETAILS!”
You take a deep breath and sigh as you tell her to freshen up before you get into it all. She protests but gets up quickly when she realises you’d delay giving her the gossip even further if she persisted. 
When Mia almost runs back to her room with her bags, you stare at her as you let out a chuckle in disbelief. Well, at least someone’s entertained.
You go to the kitchen and grab two packs of instant noodles. As you set the water on the stove for boiling, you go back to your room to take a shower to shake off the lethargic feeling that had taken over your body.
You wrap up your routine quicker than usual, knowing Mia would grow impatient if she had to wait longer than necessary whenever it came to ‘juicy drama’. 
When you get out of the bathroom in your room, you look at your reflection in the mirror as your fingers roam over the marks Choso had left on your skin. You feel the heat rise to your cheeks when you recall the sensation of his lips on you and then you remember the dream from less than an hour ago. You let out a sigh – you’re screwed, and it’s not the good kind.
You touch the bruise just below your left ear and move a few strands of hair over it. Your hair might do a good job at covering it, you just have to be careful not to flip it… or tie it up… or move too fast and basically freeze in place and you’ll be good.
The other hickey is much more prominent. It sits just slightly above your right clavicle. When you brush your fingers over it, it feels sensitive. This is going to be a task to cover up. You sigh again – something you’ve been doing a lot since yesterday. 
For now, you decide a round neck t-shirt would be good enough as you rummage through your closet. You get dressed quickly and walk to the kitchen. By the time you’re done serving the hot noodles in two bowls, you hear Mia’s footsteps from behind.
“Need any help?” she asks as she enters the kitchen. “Yes, can you please grab our coffee?” you say and you tilt your head in the direction of the two mugs on the counter. She takes the mugs and walks out, you follow behind with the noodle bowls.
The minute you set everything on the coffee table in front of the sofa, your roomie turns you around. You realise trying to cover up the hickeys was a futile effort as Mia yanks the neckline down to observe the mark above your collarbone.
You scrunch your face as she squeals with a series of ‘Ohmygodddddd, I can’t believe this actually happened. I CALLED IT! I told you! I told you it was gonna happen!!!’
You’ve been hearing one too many ‘I told you so’s for the last two days and so far none of them have been pleasant. 
“You done or should I take a nap while you fangirl?” you joke dryly as she gives you a side-eye and punches your shoulder playfully.
“Okay, tell me everything. That’s a deep mark, I just know he’s a freak! What was his dick like? I’m sure it’s big… It’s always the quiet ones!” She speaks so fast that any normal person would miss half of what she’d just said.
“I don’t know… because we never got to that part.” you reply sternly. She frowns at you and stares at you in confusion, waiting for you to continue.
You tell her everything from the top – about seeing the snaps from the party, calling Choso over, him comforting you, the accidental make out and his confession after. She interrupts you several times to ask for details when she catches you skimming over some parts. 
Nothing can ever get past Mia so you realise you might as well ask for her expert opinion on all of this. You’d always trusted her opinion when it came to matters of the heart since she’s always drawing from her own experiences. Mia is the type of person who has superior insight and introspective ability that you only wish to develop some day.
As you both hungrily gobble down the noodles and coffee, you also tell her that ever since Choso pointed it out, you’ve suddenly been awfully aware about how Satoru knew you had a crush on him but never cared enough to confront you about it.
“... and so I can’t help but feel that the reason I never told him I had a crush on him is because deep down I might’ve been scared of getting rejected. Because, if he knows I like him, it means that he ignored my feelings and kept me on a hook on purpose…” you trail off towards the end of your monologue, still grappling with all your half-cooked emotions.
“Hmm,” Mia ponders over your words, taking a brief pause before speaking up, “Satoru does like attention so I won’t be surprised if he gave you just enough signals to keep the crush alive but not enough to give you a clear indication of anything stronger… still, I doubt that dummy had any ill intention, maybe he thought your crush was surface level and not some deep infatuation.”
“Well, now I’m not even sure if I like him.” you almost whisper, embarrassed to admit it out loud.
“You’ve been pining over him for about 6 months.” Mia narrows her eyes at you.
“I know… but I can’t explain it. Now that I know Satoru never really considered me as a potential partner, it’s sort of making me realise how delusional I've been. I hadn’t felt anything all these years of us being friends so why did I suddenly like him just months ago? I hate liking him… it’s so frustrating!” you wonder out loud, hoping she’d have some answers.
Instead, she asks you something that you honestly have no answer to, “How do you know when you actually like someone?”
“You find them attractive and like spending time with them?” you answer as you think of Satoru. She urges you to continue, not satisfied with the surface-level shit. You think harder and add, “When tiny things remind you of them? It’s like you can find traces of them in your everyday life, even when sometimes the situation might not be related to them.” 
You’ve been picking at your nails but stop the movement as soon as you notice it. Mia stays quiet as you look up at her to continue.
“Oh! And you want to know their likes and dislikes, but not just the basics. You want to know their thoughts on something you like as well and you want to share more of you with them and get to know them more than anyone ever has.” you smile as you finish your analysis. But your smile quickly fades when you realise that Satoru wasn’t the one on your mind when you spoke the last few sentences.
“Look at you gooo,” Mia whistles, causing you to roll your eyes at her. As if it’s an intuitive thing for her, she asks, “Who was on your mind just now?”
Not Satoru.
“No one.” you know it’s not the answer she wants to hear. She’s too optimistic to believe you’d be more open about your feelings, no matter how confusing they might be. 
“You know what they say, you can lie to everyone else but yourself… all I can tell you is that if you didn’t think of Satoru then our poor blondie was just a placeholder.” she begins but you raise an eyebrow at her.
“Placeholder?” you interrupt to ask.
“Yes. You know how we’re always taught a romanticised version of love? It’s like, somewhere along the way, we mistake craving for love itself with craving for a particular person. You want to feel the feeling of being in love but you can’t possibly do that if the feeling itself has no face to it. So when I call him a placeholder, it’s in the way you channel your delusions of love through him when you may not even have any romantic feelings for him to begin with!”
You process everything that she says and as much as you dislike the way it is making you feel, deep down you know that her theory might apply to you more than you’d like to admit. 
She speaks up again after a brief pause, “You liked the feeling of crushing on someone because it signified that the romantic space in your heart wasn't empty… and who else could possibly be a better placeholder than your closest friend, Satoru?”
You stay silent. You feel exposed. As if your emotions had been bared out in the open without your permission. The kind of emotions that are too rough to be brought to the surface. Emotions that only ever seem decent when you present a polished, snipped version of them to the outside world.
Mia is aware of this. She knows this all too well because she’d been in your position way too many times. She pulls you out of your thoughts as she speaks up again.
“It’s okay. You’re okay.” she squeezes your hand gently. You give her a smile despite still feeling like you’re tripping over the heavy realisation you just had. “Let’s watch something?”
She turns the TV on and sees Bridgerton under your ‘Continue Watching’ tab and lets out a tiny giggle as she wiggles her eyebrows at you. You punch her arm lightly.
“Maybe you can text Choso about continuing the show... ‘Heyyy, do you want to come over and finish where we left off.’” she says, trying to mock you with a sexy voice and it makes you laugh.
Mia ends up picking a random 2000s romcom and you both doze off on the sofa by the time the credits roll. When you wake up, it’s already quite late, so you order some food and call it a night when you’re done with dinner.
The whole week passes by quicker than expected since you were mostly busy with work during the day and busy pondering over what the recent reversal of your crush on Satoru means moving forward.
By the time Saturday arrives, you feel as if you have sorted out your feelings in the best way you possibly could. There was nothing to fix when it came to Satoru since you’d stopped feeling miserable over him. In your mind, he’d already gone back to being your close friend but at the same time, you were awfully aware that the only thing you really missed about crushing on him was the placeholder phenomenon Mia had described so well.
As for Choso, it was a whole different thing. You completely ignored any thoughts about him that arose in your mind for about 3 days after the kiss. Afterall, you’d accused him of thinking with his dick that night, it’d be hypocritical if you felt attracted to him just because you made out.
So after not texting him for a week, here you were, contemplating texting him as you sat in the living room. He hadn’t texted you all week either, you debate to yourself. 
Well, can you blame him? 
You take a deep breath as you text him, asking him if he had time for hot chocolate. He replies with a simple ‘yes’ after what feels like forever (15 minutes later).
Not wanting to bother him with the task when he arrives, you prepare two cups of hot chocolate and keep them at their place on the coffee table as you wait for your doorbell to ring eagerly.
You almost sprint to the door when the bell rings five minutes later. You rub your sweaty hands on the fabric of your t-shirt before opening the door with a wide smile. He returns your smile as he walks in and past you to sit on the sofa.
No hugs. Okay.
You notice his hair is pulled up in a sweaty bun with his gym bag placed near his feet.
“You were at the gym?” you inquire.
“Hmm. Texted you when I was wrapping it up.” he replies as he takes one of the cups. You sit next to him and grab the other one.
You’re almost offended at him going to the gym alone. For about 4 months now, you’d been going together on the weekends since your weekday schedules don’t align well enough to make it to the gym at the same time. 
“Why didn’t you call me?” you ask, your voice sounds dejected although you’d tried masking it well. 
“Figured you’d want some space.” he replies curtly. You want to yell at him to stop being so formal. You miss your Choso.
“Choso,” you sigh as you look at him, waiting for him to meet your gaze. When he does, you speak again, “A lot happened and I needed time to process it all. You were right about it all, about Satoru ignoring me and me doing the same to you. I’m so sorry that I made you feel as if you were only an emotional support friend. I wish I could show you how much you mean to me.”
You notice the stiffness in his shoulders ease a bit at your words. Taking it as a positive sign you continue, “I won’t lie, but I haven’t really seen you in a romantic light since I’ve been blindly crushing over Satoru… not to say that I don’t find you attractive! You’re hot- but that’s besides the point… the point is, can we be friends first? I’d really like to know you for who you are, without all of our talks being overshadowed by me ranting about some stupid crush.”
You almost believe your words did more damage than good before you see a smile break on Choso’s otherwise resting face. You smile back at him.
It’s his turn to speak now, “I think I can handle that… but I believe you’re being too harsh on yourself. While your crush has been a constant topic of conversation, you’ve been a good friend regardless. You have been there for me whenever I needed a friend to talk to and you always listen to me rant about work or whatever just as much.”
You nod at him to continue.
“I’d say we already know each other pretty well. But of course, I'll always want to know more about you… what can I say? You’ve piqued my interest and it’s been hard to let go since.” he pinches your cheek as you feel a blush creep up your face.
You push his hand away but it’s only to get closer to hug him. He wraps his arms around your waist, completely enveloping you into his space, but it's far from invasive – it’s more welcoming than ever. You bury your face into his neck, breathing in the soothing scent of oud and jasmine, mixed with a tiny hint of sweat.
“So, how are things on the Satoru front? You’re almost making it sound as if you’ve lost interest.” he jokes when you pull away, secretly hoping his intuition is right.
You briefly tell him about your talk with Mia, leaving out the part where you’d told your roomie all about the makeout sesh. He raises an eyebrow at the placeholder theory but simply nods as he thinks it over in his head.
“So you really are over him?” He asks once again. Even if he intends to seek reassurance, you can’t tell by the way his tone is almost indifferent. 
You joke about his crush on you being a similar type of thing and you bet him that he’ll soon realise he doesn’t like you like he thought he did.
“You’re a lot more than a placeholder to me, baby.” he pouts at you before swiftly getting up to take the empty cups back to the kitchen, not giving you time to react. You watch his back, baffled at how daring and straightforward Choso can get sometimes.
He returns at the same time Mia comes out of her room, yawning as she covers her mouth.
“Hey Choso, how are you?” she smiles slyly at him. There’s a sudden shift in his body language and you realise Mia’s presence has suddenly made him nervous. It doesn’t take a genius to put two and two together. 
He’s aware you’ve told her about him.
And based on how well he knows you, he’s certain you’ve given Mia an unabridged version of the events of last Saturday. He greets her back with an awkward ‘sup’ and you can’t help but think of it as a boyfriend-meets-parents type of situation.
Your amusement is visible on your face and Mia catches onto it. What she says next surprises you.
“Good thing you’re here. I was just inviting people over for my birthday weekend next weekend.” she smiles at him.
“Birthday weekend?” Choso asks.
“Yup, so each year, the people whose birthdays lie on and/or closest to the weekend, they get a whole weekend where they’re the boss and everyone else in the group has to strictly follow whatever they’ve planned for the whole group.” she explains.
Choso looks at you, already loving being invited to something like this. “But don’t get your hopes up too high! Mia is a homebody so we’re all probably going to be trapped at home baking stuff or something like that.” you add, nonetheless, his excitement doesn’t fade. 
He tells Mia he’ll be looking forward to it and hugs you both like he’s about to leave. This time you ask him to stay to finish the last 2 episodes of Bridgerton. He thinks it over hesitantly but agrees. The only difference this time is that Mia has joined you on the sofa. You don’t complain though, since the last thing you needed right now was to be left alone with Choso while watching steamy sex scenes from the final episodes.
When Choso eventually leaves, you express your surprise to Mia at her inviting him for the birthday weekend, which almost always, only involves your tiny group consisting of Satoru, Suguru, Shoko, Kento, Mia and you.
“Think of it as me playing cupid babe”, she pouts as she makes kissing sounds at you and you palm her face to push her away. She giggles, “My plan is to keep everyone trapped in the house for two whole days, it’ll be so boring, it’ll ironically be so much fun. And you get to spend all your time with your loverboy.”
“He’s not my loverboy,” you protest.
“Oh yeah? Say that to his cute ass puppy eyes that always fixate on you whenever he hears you laugh. He’s so gone for you, it’s almost sickening to watch, being a third wheel.”
“Give it a rest… dear lord!” you say but you can’t help but feel another blush forming on your cheeks due to her constant teasing.
You were trying your best not to like Choso romantically, you wanted to give it time to make sure you weren’t liking him as just another placeholder.
The next week passes by just as quickly. The only difference is that this time you constantly find yourself taking tiny breaks from work to text Choso. You feel great relief when he texts you back with the same enthusiasm… or maybe he’s always been that way and you’re the one who’s just now noticing it.
Mia had explained her plan for the birthday weekend on your friends’ group chat. The plan was for everyone to gather at your place on Friday evening, along with whatever essentials they needed to hibernate for the next two days. You call it hibernate because Mia’s one rule for the weekend was that nobody would step outside the apartment at any cost, unless someone had an emergency only as grave as a heart attack.
Psychopath would be a harsh word, but, hypothetically speaking, if Mia were given a chance to take part in one of those human psychological experiments, she'd do it happily while dragging the rest of the group with her.
However, on the upside, Mia was a gamer girl through and through. It was kind of perfect because you, on the other hand, were a card game expert of sorts. It was a simple plan really –  games, drinks, movies – yet if you were to ask Satoru and Shoko’s opinion on the matter, they’d protest by saying something along the lines of a party isn’t a party unless you bar-hop while getting shitfaced drunk at 3am.
On Friday evening, as soon as you return from work, you and Mia clean the apartment for your friends’ welcome. You arrange the card games and snacks on the table before freshening up.
You’d informed Choso about the plan as well and he’d texted you half an hour ago that he’d be there in 30 minutes. You run to your room to check your outfit in the mirror once again. You straighten out the fabric of your skorts and pull at the hem of your sweatshirt. 
Casual but cute — you did not want to make it seem as if you dressed up to stay at home but you figured you could at least look a bit presentable. You touch up your lipgloss and convince yourself it’s strictly to protect your lips from cracking due to the cold.
When the bell rings, you feel as if the inside of your stomach does a backflip. You hurriedly walk out of your room and see Mia at the door, welcoming Choso in. He’s wearing a vivid indigo blue sweater with black sweatpants. The feeling in your stomach returns when you observe his soft hair pushed back and tucked behind his ears with a few tiny strands kissing his forehead.
He gives her a side hug as he hands her a long black box wrapped with a golden ribbon. You walk towards them and you swear you see his smile grow when he looks at you. He puts his hand out to you and you grab it. With a smooth movement, he pulls you to him while his other arm wraps around your shoulder. The hug is brief yet it makes you feel giddy.
Shit. Staying platonic with him is going to be one hell of a task.
“...hope it won’t be awkward for your other friends.” your thought breaks when you hear him talk to Mia. 
“No, not at all! Don’t worry, they’re all pretty chill!” Mia reassures him. Choso has met your group a handful of times so they are, what one would consider, mutuals, but he’s only friends with you and Mia in the real sense of the word.
“What did you get?” you ask him, looking at the wrapped box in Mia’s hands. He gestures for her to open it. Her smile grows as she pulls out the big bottle of scotch, waving it around in excitement.
“Thank you for aiding my borderline alcoholism with my drink of choice.” she jokes as she bows at him.
“Always glad to help.” he laughs as he bows his head to mimic her. You smile to yourself, happy that he’s so attentive and considerate of everyone close to him. “By the way, where do I keep my bag?” he asks, sliding his backpack off his shoulder.
“You can keep it in my room… everyone is probably going to dump everything there since Mia’s room has their precious xbox setup.” you say as he smiles and makes his way to your room. Mia goes to the kitchen to keep the bottle somewhere it’s safe and sound.
When Choso returns, he observes the decks of multiple card games, arranged on the table. There’s Dobble, Monopoly Deal, UNO, and chess as well. You had to restrain yourself from bringing out all the other games you had since you did not want to overwhelm your friends with too many options.
“Which one is your favourite?” he asks.
“Kamo… would you pick favourites if you ever had kids?” you retort.
“Yes.” he says with a straight face, “now, answer me.” His tone makes you snort but you grab the tin with the Dobble cards as you explain how it works. Mia returns from the kitchen and you offer her to join your game but she makes up some excuse to go back to her room, leaving you alone with Choso. You have a feeling she’s going to try to manufacture such moments for the two of you throughout the whole weekend.
You have three clean wins before Choso starts getting frustrated at his loss. “How on earth can you spot them so quickly!?”
You shrug, smug about your wins. When you draw the next hand, the bell rings and you turn your head to look towards the door. Mia comes out to get it and you hear Choso yell, “GOT IT!” causing you to turn back to the cards.
“Hey! It doesn’t count, I wasn’t paying attention.” you complain.
“Not my fault. We’d drawn the cards already.” he says, grinning with a pleased look on his face. You know he's not going to concede so you let it go.
“I wasn’t aware we were allowed to bring plus one this time?” you hear Satoru’s voice behind you. You turn around to roll your eyes at him. He’s leaning down to your side with a wide grin and his arms extended. You hook your arm around his waist to give him a side hug.
“I invited him, he’s replacing you since you’re so busy nowadays.” Mia speaks up and you press your lips to keep yourself from laughing. He presses his hands to his chest dramatically as if Mia’s words have physically wounded him.
You crinkle your nose to cringe at him and you sense Choso looking at you. But as soon as you look back at him, he turns his head down as he grabs all the cards to put them back in the tin.
“Quitting already?” you tease him. He looks up at you and smirks, “No, there’s enough people to play Monopoly now. You just wait and watch how I smoke you.”
“What makes you so sure? You don’t know who you’re up against.” you raise an eyebrow at him.
“Hmmm… wanna bet?” He challenges you. 
You smile cockily, “Deal, what’s at stake?”
“Oh, nothing too bold… maybe just your heart and soul.” he teases you. You bite the insides of your cheeks to keep yourself from blushing at his comment and break eye contact to lean towards the table to grab the deck of Monopoly Deal.
You fail to notice that Satoru had already started drawing conclusions based on the tiny interaction he witnessed between you and Choso. As he walks to the kitchen with Mia, he half whispers, “Is it just me o-”
“Nope. you’re seeing it right.” she interrupts him.
“Since when did Choso, of all people, get so close with her?” he inquires.
“Haha, blondie… you have no idea!” Mia chuckles, amused. “Why? You jealous?” 
He snickers at her question, “No.”
“Good.”
The conversation ends there and he knows better than to push it further. As the duo returns, carrying four glasses of homemade lemonade mixed with vodka, you jump up to walk towards them to grab two of them and hand one to Choso. He thanks you with a smile and you return it.
When Mia suggests it, you all sit on the floor around the table comfortably as you distribute the cards for everyone.
When you win the first game of Monopoly, you stick your tongue out at Choso. He didn’t seem to mind losing at all, nonetheless, he feigned hurt, “Damn, do I really need to give you my heart and soul now?”
With the alcohol getting to you, you felt brave enough to flirt with him as you replied back in an instant, “I thought you’d already given your heart to me?”
His eyebrows raise up in surprise as he lets out a chuckle. He drags your name out as he speaks, “You know I consider myself to be a romantic of sorts, but that’s too cheesy even for me!” you slap his arm as both of you start laughing as if it’s the funniest thing ever, almost forgetting that Mia and Satoru are right there in the room with you two.
You only turn to look at Satoru when he clears his throat. “Oh right… When is the rest of the gang getting here?” you ask Satoru.
“Check the group chat, they’ve texted.” he replies curtly. And you can’t help but feel as if he’s acting a bit cold. Usually you’d brush it off as just overthinking, or blame it on the alcohol but you’re certain that throughout the game, he has been actively ignoring you.
The awkwardness of the situation dissipates a little when Shoko, Kento and Suguru arrive about an hour later. When the clock strikes midnight, everyone hands Mia their presents but everyone is too drunk to care what the others have gotten her.
You’d be lying if you said you remembered anything about the events of Friday night through Sunday morning. The photos and videos on your phones are the only evidence you have of a time well spent. There was a lot of gossip, cheating at card games, fighting for turns on the Xbox, laughing at shit jokes, crying at sappy hallmark movies and an incident where you and Mia almost set the kitchen on fire, trying to bake a batch of brownies for everyone. You were barred from entering the kitchen all day after that and it was followed by a long debate about how it was against your rights as owners to be banned from your own kitchen. You gave up on trying to forcefully enter the kitchen after a while, since five people against two wasn’t really a fair battle.
So Sunday morning, it was a collective decision to stay sober to avoid being hungover at work the next day. Not like you guys had a choice anyway, since all the booze had been wiped out in the last 36 hours, not even Choso’s fancy scotch had survived the night. It was all a haze, to say the least.
Although you vaguely remember Choso and you sharing a few moments alone from time to time, you also remember all of them being interrupted, mostly by Satoru. You make a mental note of wanting to confront Satoru sometime soon.
Sometime soon arrives Sunday evening when Satoru walks in on you and Choso making hot chocolate in the kitchen. You’d been talking to Choso about who had the highest tolerance among the group.
You’re pressed to his side with your head resting on his shoulder as he leans against the counter. “...far from it. You’re a lightweight!” Choso calls your bullshit.
“No, listen… I vibe easily, I don’t get drunk easily. There’s a difference.” you protest.
He pinches your cheek, teasing, “okay baby… whatever you say.”
You try to elbow him but stop your movement when you hear Satoru enter the kitchen, “Are you making hot chocolate?”
You’re slightly annoyed at his feigned innocence since you’d already asked the entire group if they wanted hot chocolate, like, 5 minutes ago. He had declined then.
“Cool, can I get one too?” he asks.
“Sure.” you leave Choso’s side as you grab another mug to prepare the drink. 
Sensing the tension, Choso excuses himself politely, “I’m outside, okay?” he squeezes your shoulder before walking out of the kitchen.
“You seem pretty close.” Satoru comments. You put the mug in the oven before you turn around to look at him.
“Satoru… what is it?” you sigh.
“Nothing… I’m just surprised you got over me so quickly.” he says playfully.
Oh, so you’re having this conversation right now.
“You can’t possibly be serious right now? What do you mean moved on? What was there to move on from… you ignoring my feelings and only keeping me on the hook whenever you wanted attention?” you sound far from playful.
“Ouch.” he says quietly. Maybe talking to you about this was a bad idea.
“Look… I’m sorry if me having a crush on you made you uncomfortable. I’d hate for things to be awkward now after being such close friends all these years. But I’m sad that you sort of led me on and toyed with my emotions for your own amusement.” you add as you look down.
There’s a moment of silence. Then Satoru moves towards you to hug you. He pats your head with one hand while the other rubs your back.
“I had no idea that having a crush on me made you so miserable. We’ve always been flirting with each other platonically, I initially thought it was the same thing. When I realised you were serious about it, I figured that maybe it would fade without us needing to address it.” he says softly.
“No, to be honest, I realised quite recently that I don’t really like you like that.” you interrupt him.
“Yeah, no shit. You’ve been flirting with him all weekend.” he laughs. You blush out of embarrassment. 
He continues, “But that’s besides the point. I’m sorry, okay? I’ve designated you as my best frien– don’t tell Suguru. I admit I did like the attention so I'm sorry for hurting you, even if it might’ve been unintentional for the most part. ”
You look up at him as you raise your eyebrows at him. Satoru isn’t the kind to apologise easily.
“Gojo Satoru is apologising to me?” you smirk at him.
“Don’t milk it. You know I really mean it, I'm truly sorry. I can also allow you one punch anywhere besides my face and crotch to prove it. I’ll always love you, you’re my homie.” he says pulling you closer into the hug. You wrap your arms around him, smacking the area near his lower back a bit too hard. You catch him by surprise as he jerks away from your touch, letting out a loud ‘ahh’.
“Jeez, what a b–,” he pauses, clearing his throat as he extends his arm out to you, “We’re even now, cool?” 
“Okay, cool.” you smile at him. “So, how’s it going with your new girl?”
“Oh it’s pretty chill. Nothing serious though. We like each other but we both agreed that it’s pretty casual.” he explains.
“Really? I was under the impression that you were falling in love and shit.” 
“How can I love someone else when I got you?” he teases as he ruffles your hair. You glare at him with a murderous intent. 
“I’m kidding!” he adds, laughing, “But no, I’m not falling in love so soon. I always thought I’d fall in love in my mid 30s. Seems like the perfect age to fall in love.” 
You shake your head, “Satoru, you dummy… love doesn’t work on your schedule. It happens when it is meant to happen! If you don’t go all the way in, deep in your feels with someone, you won’t even recognize it if love arrives in your life.”
“Okay sensei… seems like you know a lot about going all the way in deep. Is Choso also going in deep?” he wiggles his eyebrows at you. You cringe at his crass innuendo but nonetheless blush at the mention of Choso’s name.
“Maybe it's none of your business!” you retort. He shrugs as he puts his hands up in defeat.
“Come out soon, we’re gonna watch another romcom.” he says as he walks past you.
“Wait, your hot chocolate?” you ask as you see him walking out of the kitchen.
“Nah, on second thought, I don’t want it anymore.” he says as he leaves. You stand there as you watch him go, with equal parts amusement and equal parts disbelief.
This is the Satoru you knew, your annoying best friend and not the romanticised version of him you had in your head. You feel peaceful for a split second as you finally sense things return back to normal, before your mind wanders to thoughts of Choso. 
Can you redirect your love where it can actually be reciprocated? You’re aware that you’d been growing fond of him with every minute you spend together… but are you certain he’s not just someone you’re using to fill the vacancy in your heart?
~~~
taglist: @lik0 @hueanhdang @dellalyra @personomy
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We've Got Tonight (Paul McCartney x Starr!Female!Reader)
Find Part Two Here
A/N: WOW, is all I can say. The alarming support from those of you reading my work is driving me to write more than EVER right now! I cannot say thank you enough, y'all. Your notes and comments inspire me, so please keep it up if you wanna read more from me!
I'm about to bless y'all with some McBeardy angst, so I hope you all enjoy!!
Also, this fic was inspired by Bob Seger's We've Got Tonight, so I highly recommend listening to the song before and/or after reading this one to get into the vibe of it.
Summary: Paul is in his lonesome after a break up. So are you. You decide to keep each other company.
WARNINGS: ANGST, but it gets sweet in the end. Mentions of cheating, low self esteem. Suggestive actions, mentions/insinuation of sex, but no smut (that'll be saved for a bonus part 2 if anyone's interested in that.)
There is mention of the Beatles' extended family, so if I have any incorrect info in here, I apologize in advance; I didn't want this to become too much of a history lesson.
Also, like my other fics, this one is a NOVEL, so please read when you have a good half hour+ of free time :)
I don't wanna rate this a T, but there is no smut in this, so please just be aware that there is sex mentioned/insinuated, so PLEASE just read at your own discretion. But most of all, enjoy!
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Paul was sitting on the sofa in the den, alone with the lights out. He was staring out the window at the night in silence as he sucked down another cigarette and sipped at another glass of scotch.
It was late enough that the world around him was dead sleep, yet he was wide awake, and alone with his thoughts.
He broke it off with Linda. She was a sweet girl, and no one was really quite sure why things ended between them, but they all knew it was a mutual agreement.
Paul really hadn't been taking it well, though. He hadn't been sleeping right for almost a month, and he stared drinking a little more. He didn't want anyone really knowing, which is why he did it in his lonesome.
He wasn't necessarily by himself, because the rest of the Beatles were upstairs in their collective rooms asleep; but what made him feel alone was that alongside the bandmates in their rooms were their families and wives. And Paul just didn't have that.
Usually he would have been rather vocal over something that bothered him so much, but the band felt like recently they'd been clashing, so he wasn't wanting to bother them with something like that.
While Paul finished the final puff of his cigarette and put out the butt in the ashtray on the coffee table, his head snapped to the entrance of the den, where he caught sight of a silhouette in the threshold.
You stopped in your tracks when Paul made eye contact with you. You supposed he'd heard your footsteps.
From what you could tell from the light of the moon shining in through the window, Paul seemed worn out. He rubbed the side of his face with his free hand before wordlessly nodding to you in acknowledgement.
"... I'm sorry to intrude. I didn't know anyone was still awake. I was just needing a drink," you explained quietly. You'd met Paul a few times here and there-- you had to, with Ringo-- or Rich-- your brother, being one of his bandmates and all.
Paul was always kind when you interacted with each other, but you could definitely tell something was a little off about his behaviour this time around.
Rich did mention Paul's break-up to you briefly, but you were going through your own separation, so you were in your own head with your own problems. That's why Rich offered to bring you along with him, Maureen, Zak, and Jason on this trip with the rest of the guys and their families, so you could get away from thinking about your ex.
Unfortunately, the unfamiliar space put you in the same position as Paul; wide awake, in the middle of the night, with a racing mind.
"'S alright," he sighed before drinking the rest of the scotch in his glass and raising to his feet. You watched him move around the room to the alcohol cabinet right outside the kitchen.
He refilled his glass right to the top before wordlessly grabbing a second glass out, tossing in a few ice cubes, and filling it three quarters of the way before sliding it over to you.
Your eyes widened a little, considering you'd actually come down for some water, but maybe this was a sign you were going to want something stronger.
"... Should've asked you if you even like this stuff," Paul stated apologetically when he realized how gentlemanly he was not being. You smiled sadly at him, but picked up the glass anyways.
He matched his glass to the same level as yours before you both gently tapped them together. The sound of the glass chimed for a moment before you and Paul raised the drinks to your lips.
The scotch was harsh, and you surely made an unflattering face as you took a sip, but Paul didn't say anything to you, as he was too busy staring at the ice swirling around in his own glass.
"... What're you doing up so late, if you don't mind me asking?" You asked after a moment of silence, and Paul's big brown eyes met yours for another quiet second as he thought about what to respond with.
He pushed his tongue into his cheek before shrugging and mumbling into his glass, "thinking."
After taking another sip of his drink and staring off into space for a moment or two, he bit his lip, gesturing over to you with his glass.
"And you?" You shook your head, realizing it was your turn to scrounge up an excuse for being wide awake at such an absurd time.
"Can't sleep," you lied.
Paul frowned, motioning you to the sofa he was just sitting on to invite you to sit for a while. After a moment of pondering whether you should really go back to your room, you made up your mind and headed to the sofa, Paul following suit.
There was just something about the way his dark eyes gazed into yours, and behind them was this sadness you just couldn't ignore.
Before he took a seat, you were able to get another good look at him. He was in black jeans, and a green sweater; his day-clothes completely contrasting your pyjama set. He'd grown his hair out since you saw him last, and now he was sporting a full beard.
You always thought he was a good looking guy, but now, without being blinded by any bias, there was really no denying how handsome Paul had become since you seen him last.
In fact, it felt like every time you ended up seeing him next, he always seemed to look better and better, and you weren't quite sure how that was possible.
Paul took the seat right next to you, and he set his drink down on the coffee table, clasping his hands together, elbows on the thighs, and hanging his head.
"To be honest with you... I went through a separation about a month ago. And I don't seem to be handling it well." He finally sighed, turning his head so he was looking at you again. He unclasped his hands and ran his fingers through his beard a few times.
"I'm a romantic, y'know, and I'm not a fan of being so lonely." You nodded your head a little at his words. What was tough was that you didn't have anything encouraging to say to him because you were in the same boat.
Paul swallowed when you remained silent, and then he cleared his throat. He scratched the back of his head nervously as he leaned back into the sofa.
"I'm sorry, I know it's late, and you're probably just wanting to head to bed." He gave a little head nod of understanding as he rubbed his eye with his finger. "You're not here to talk to me about my problems."
It was your turn to set your drink down on the table, turning your attention to him again.
"Well... will that help make you feel better, perhaps?" you watched Paul's eyes meet yours again, and he pressed his lips together tightly in thought.
"... I don't know if there is really much to say," he said after a moment, reaching for his glass again.
"Thank you, though. Was very kind of you to offer somethin' like that."
After he took another sip of his drink, he gestured to you again with his glass.
"... Ringo sort of mentioned you were going through a separation too... You doin' okay?" Paul tried his best to be as inclusive as possible, but it was all rough stuff to talk about, so he treaded carefully.
"I mean..." you trailed off for a moment before responding with a simple, "I'm angry, above all else."
You were honestly taken aback by Paul's question. Rich wasn't necessarily the greatest person to receive comforting advice from, especially when it came to this separation, since he thought so highly of your ex, but you perhaps weren't telling him the whole truth.
But you were definitely surprised he even mentioned your pain to anyone else, let alone his bandmates.
"Kept a lot of heavy things to myself for a long time, it just became exhausting." Now it was your turn to reach for your scotch, still cringing at its strength as you took a generous mouthful.
Paul waited a beat before asking, "would talking about it with me maybe make you feel better?"
"... you really care to know that stuff?" You asked gently for clarification. As mentioned, you and Paul weren't close, you could probably count on one hand the amount of times you met him prior to this moment...
And this was heavy stuff you were seemingly about to share, and you really wanted to make sure he was okay with that.
Paul nodded his head without hesitation, and offered, "'s the least I can do for you for keeping me company so late."
You sighed a deep breath, and took a few more sips from your glass before putting it back down, curling your legs up to your chest, and began.
You told Paul about your ex. You told him about how you were with him for five years, and watched him slowly fall out of love with you, sleep around, and how you struggled with self-image and self-worth for a long time.
You also mentioned how you were the one to leave, but he had no idea you had any strength to do so, so he tried for a long while to guilt you into going back to him.
The difficult things to talk about made you a little more emotional, so you breathed your way through it slowly as to not cry. The drink Paul poured for you was helping you relax at least.
Paul was more than patient with you, and you were grateful for that. At one point during the lengthy conversation, he lit another cigarette, and began offering you drags throughout your story to calm your nerves.
You took those offers graciously, and thankfully.
"... I don't know. I just lay awake every night, wondering if there was something I could have done different so he didn't do what he did."
You were staring out the window with Paul now, taking in just how many stars you could actually see from the den. He took his final puffs of his smoke, the thin silver waves swirling in the air above the both of your heads.
"Sounds like he didn't cherish you enough when you were around," Paul debated gently, shaking his head and putting out his cigarette end in the ashtray next to the others. He picked up his scotch again before mumbling against the rim,
"He's not worth it."
You pulled yourself from the trance of the tiny lights outside to wipe remnants of silent, salty tears off your cheeks, and you used that moment to glance over at Paul, whose nose was still deep in the glass. When he pulled the drink away from his mouth and swallowed, you parted your lips to speak.
"... was Linda worth it?" You didn't mean it in a rude way, but you hadn't met her personally, and you wanted to pry Paul just a tiny bit.
He smiled, but it was bitter. You figured you struck a nerve, and before you could apologize for what you said, he answered simply, with tears glossing his own eyes,
"Yes. She was."
You tilted your head a little and frowned, trying to understand what drove them apart.
"It was just never the right timing. She was ready for things I wasn't in the beginning, and then down the road, when I was seemingly ready for those things, she wasn't. And I didn't want her wasting her time on a life she didn't wanna live, y'know?"
"So she's the one that got away," you mused gently.
"Indeed, she was." Paul nodded a little before finishing the rest of his scotch in his glass, leaning back again, and cradling his head in his hand as he looked at you for another quiet moment, resting his glass in-hand on his thigh.
"... I'm not a bad person, am I?" Those watery eyes never disappeared, and you had to break his sad gaze, opting to reach out and rub his shoulder comfortingly.
"Hey, no. Wasting your time, or her time, like the way my ex did to me, would have made you a bad person, Paul. Saying good bye was the right thing to do."
"Well, I wish that made me feel better," he mumbled, dropping his own gaze to the space between the both of you. He pushed a stray tear away before he thought you could see it, and then scratched at his beard again. You guessed that must have been a habit of his out of stress.
"Something about her made me feel like she was the one. Like we were meant to share the same story; but we always seemed to be on a different chapter,"
He sniffled, but only once. "That being said, was I perhaps too lovestruck in the end to want to believe that her future was meant to be shared with someone else?"
His voice carried so much sorrow, and you knew he needed some kind of advice. It took you a moment or so to find the right words to say to him.
"... Knowing my ex wasn't right for me and the reality of me leaving doesn't make me feel any better. At all." You offered to Paul, before adding,
"... But why should the expectations of those we chose to take out of our life dictate the way we behave today?"
The words that came out of your mouth were surprisingly wise, and you watched Paul's eyebrows knit together as he absorbed what you said.
He focused his sight to you again, a more determined look on his face. Paul knew you were absolutely right. He was a charmer; romancing people was his thing.
There was no denying Linda was special, but when he realized he really had no commitment in romancing her anymore, he finally understood that it was his own thoughts holding him back.
Even if it took him a little longer than expected, he knew you were right. He would recover from this.
"... I think you just opened my eyes and made me realize something... Thank you, y/n, really." He reached up with his free hand after a second, fingers grazing your own hand still on his arm in comfort, showing you his gratitude for your words of advice.
You smiled a little, glad you were able to help him somewhat through his times of trouble as you pulled your hand away.
Paul stood up again, retrieving his empty glass from the coffee table before facing you fully, a more genuine smile beginning to pull on the corners of his mouth, but it was still rather sad.
"I'm grabbing a refill, you too?"
Your sight drifted to your near-empty glass on the table.
Why let tonight go to waste? End so soon?
"Please," you asked, grabbing the glass yourself, but Paul began to tut at you as he grabbed the glass from your fingers.
"Please, I'll get it for you," he insisted, and you watched his slender figure move around the couch to head for the alcohol cabinet another time. He filled them only halfway this time, and on the way back he made a brief stop at the record player near the entrance of the den.
Soft classical music rang out quietly from the player once Paul dropped the needle down onto the vinyl, and he returned to his spot next to you with your two drinks. You thanked him quietly as he passed the glass over to you, and he leaned in a little, raising his drink between the two of you.
"Hello to... new beginnings," he began slowly.
"And Goodbye to false finales," you finished, your glasses tapping together again before you took yet another sip of the drink.
Paul matched your movements, his eyes watching you, even when you turned away to gaze longingly out the window for a moment, basking in the feeling of the gentle music flirting with your ears.
Sure, you and Paul could have went on for the rest of the night discussing your heartbreak, but you decided to drive the conversation elsewhere.
You sighted back to him after a while, his sight unwavering from you. Your eyes locked for just a beat before you decided aloud with a gentle nod,
"... you know, that beard really suits you."
Paul's eyebrows shot up, and his face darkened a little as he bit his lips between his teeth almost nervously.
"... Think so?"
You'd never seen him lack so much confidence when given a compliment before, but instead of pitying him, you almost admired his innocence.
It sounded like he needed to hear a compliment like that.
"Yes," you laughed airily, raising your glass up for another drink. Paul couldn't bite back his smile anymore, so he copied you to mask his lips. You then gestured to your head with the point of your finger as you swallowed the alcohol back easier and easier each time.
"Your hair, too. I think it's a nice length."
Your kind words made Paul feel warm and fuzzy inside, and he placed his scotch back down on the table.
"Well, thanks, Love." He rubbed the back of his neck, and laughed weakly. "I call it my 'Don't View The Mirror For Three Weeks' look."
Paul paused in his moments of self-deprecation to realize he should have maybe complimented you back. He took a second to take another good look at you as he decided what to say, exactly.
"... Y'know, the last time I saw you was a few years ago, now."
You thought for a moment on that. It had been a while since you'd seen him last. You nodded your head as you recalled the day.
"You're right, it has been some time. Christmas, 1966." John and Cynthia had hosted this massive holiday dinner, and everyone's extended family was there.
You were single at the time, and spent dinner conversing with Paul's sister, Ruth, who was at least fifteen years younger than you. There was no introduction made by Paul, she just walked up, introduced herself to you, and made a friend by herself.
She went on and on about school, and music, and how the potatoes were her favourite part of dinner; and you paid attention to everything she had to say, responding with your own opinions and jokes to keep her feeling included amongst the adults at the table.
And Paul, who was seated next to Ruth, couldn't help but overhear your conversations throughout the evening, and he found it rather charming that you treated Ruth with such respect despite her young age.
And after dinner, you and Ruth danced together almost the whole night. She eventually went over to do a little dancing with Paul, and you watched as she bounced around excitedly with her brother, who, for just a moment, locked eyes with you across the sea of dancing guests.
You remember giving him a shy wave with a smile, and he sent a wink back your way before returning his attention to Ruth, spinning her around as she squealed happily.
"... I'm rather fond of that evening," Paul stated simply, the reality of your melancholy evening strongly contrasting with the memories of the wonderful night.
Now you and Paul weren't so young, and this time he was noticing the little lines under your eyes, indicating the dragging march of time slowly catching up to you both.
"And, even after all the years that have passed... you still look as lovely tonight as you did then."
You blushed at Paul's compliment, biting back a stupid grin as you repeated the words in your head.
"And I admire your ever-present kindness," he added on, and you knew he really just meant he showed appreciation for lending him an ear in his time of need.
"More people need to be like you."
"I don't know what to say," you said honestly, settling for a gentle "thank you," in the end. Paul just nodded, unsure if there was anything to say back.
"You know..." you paused for a second, watching as Paul went for another sip from his glass. "It was quite a shame we never got a dance in that night together, just you and me."
Paul was mid sip when you said that, so you continued on.
"The music was great, everyone was in high spirits, and I was maybe too shy to approach you myself and ask you to dance with me. So I guess that's on me." You scratched your elbow as you announced your rather dumb confession to him.
Paul, who was nearly done with his drink now, waited a moment or two in thought, before rising to his feet, and wandering back over to the record player, scotch still in hand.
You tried to watch his movements over your shoulder, but it was really dark. All you knew was that he was changing the music.
The classical tune cut, and the player began to drawl a much slower, more recent song; one you hadn't yet heard.
Paul turned on his heel as he reapproached the sofa, taking the final sip of scotch he had left in his glass before placing it back down on the table, and reaching his hand out for you to take.
"Well, let's not let this dance wait any longer, then, yeah?"
You froze for just a moment, Paul's outstretched hand hung in the air for a few seconds, and your sight moved up to his face, where you noticed his confidence falter just a little.
"Again, I know it's late, and I know your plans for the night surely didn't include me..."
"But, still, here we are." Your words came out almost effortlessly. You finished your scotch as well, and when you finally put your hand in Paul's, he squeezed your fingers gently, that warm upturn finally returning to his lips.
He guided you slowly over to the windows so you weren't in so much darkness, the moonlight still shining just enough for you both to see one another; and when Paul decided he could see your face much better, he let his other hand drop to your waist, watching as your own hand rested on his forearm.
You both shifted from side to side to the beat of the music, and you stared absentmindedly at the small space between you both.
"... You okay?" He asked you quietly after a minute, and you looked up at him, cheeks reddening as you realized you could feel his breath fanning your face.
"I've realized just how long it's been since I last danced with someone like this," you mentioned sheepishly, and a little smirk pulled at the corner of Paul's mouth.
"You don't have two left feet, y'know," his tone was almost teasing, and you smiled back, glad he wasn't feeling so much sadness anymore.
Paul then added with a little shrug, "'Sides, I wanted to dance with you that night, too. But I'm very glad I have the honours now."
Paul began turning with you in slow circles together as you continued to sway, and you took a moment to decide your next words carefully.
"... I suppose what I'm trying to say is that it's different when you're dancing with someone who actually wants to dance with you. It's just... it's really nice. So thank you, Paul."
Paul let go of your waist for a moment, and raised your clasped hands above your heads so you could twirl under his arm.  When you did just that, and faced him again, he pulled you just a little closer than you were before, your torsos flush as his hand snaked slowly to the small of your back.
"Thank you," he mumbled back, quietly. You weren't entirely sure what he was thanking you for this time, but you never asked.
Instead, you shut your eyes and opted to rest your head in the crook of his neck as the hand you had on Paul's bicep slid upward so your arm circled around his shoulders, in a half embrace.
And then you felt Paul tilt his own head down as if to envelope you more. You'd be lying if you said your heart didn't skip a beat when he did that.
Paul then began to hum the lyrics of the song, quietly, as if you were the only person in the world who was meant to hear it. Both yours and his eyes were closed now as you two basked in such a beautiful moment.
Two lonely people, finding comfort, and peace in each other.
Paul raised your clasped hands closer to him so he could rest them against his chest. You could actually feel his heartbeat pounding against the side of your hand, which made you a little nervous, but not in a bad way.
Paul stopped moving you around in circles, but the swaying never ceased. He lifted his cheek off your crown after a while, and you couldn't help but open your eyes and raise your gaze back to his face.
Paul smiled so sweetly at you, and you watched his eyes shift ever so slightly from left to right as he looked back into yours. His eyebrows then worried for just a moment before he opened his mouth slightly as if to say something, but no words came out.
Your shifting finally slowed to a standstill, and you opened your mouth this time to speak, yet you found yourself in Paul's very position.
There was nothing to say.
You watched as his gaze softened on you, and you weren't sure if it was the drinks, or the lack of sleep, but it was like you could almost feel the gravity around you manipulating you to move just a little closer to him.
And he must have felt it as well. Paul's head began to drop slowly, and it wasn't long before you met him in the middle, your lips coming together in a very soft, and very unplanned kiss. The both of you kept still, almost as if the smallest move would have frightened the other away.
You were both holding your breath as well, and Paul pulled away from the kiss first, arm still wrapped around your back, hand still clasped in yours.
He was staring at you in awe, as were you, eyes wide, and lips still slightly parted as you both processed what exactly just happened.
Paul still couldn't muster any words, nor could you, for that matter; but he could definitely read your gaze. Your eyes were almost begging him to do that again.
And that's exactly what happened; your lips came crashing into each other again after only another second.
You weren't stupid, and neither was he. You both already knew this night was going to become something else entirely. You were craving the touch of someone, and you didn't even have to tell him.
You could just tell with the way he was moving his mouth against yours, and the way his body was flush with you, that he was wanting it just as bad.
Paul's hand finally let go of yours so he could lace his fingers into the hair at the back of your head, and your own hand slid around to his back. He tried pulling you even closer, but it just wasn't possible.
You sighed quietly as you kissed him again, and again, and Paul's hand unweaved itself from your hair as he cupped your face before breaking the kiss off again, another troubled look on his face.
"Ringo'll kill me if he knew I was--"
"Paul, please. I need this," you didn't let him finish his sentence. You didn't really care what your brother thought of anything, and you assumed, deep down, Paul really didn't care either, because he dove back in for more kisses as soon as he could.
His hands cupped your jawline as you gripped his sweater in your fists at his chest. You parted your mouth slightly and just melted into Paul's arms when he swiped his tongue along your bottom lip.
You moaned lowly against him, ears ringing, and all Paul could think to do was blindly shuffle you backwards towards the sofa, but instead, you felt the coffee table hit the back your legs, and you nearly stumbled back. The glasses, once filled with scotch but now only ice, shuffled against the table's surface at the force of you bumping into it.
Paul ended your kiss once more, one of his hands leaving the side of your face to circle around your hips quickly so you didn't fall back. He smiled at you when he knew you weren't going anywhere, offering you a teasing, "maybe you do have two left feet, Darling."
That wonderful pet name made your flesh rise with goosebumps, but all you could mumble to him was, "Just shut up and kiss me, Paul."
Without hesitation, he did just that, which felt like an eternity to the both of you since the last one.
He, still blindly, yet carefully, directed you around the table and to the sofa. Paul, with his hands holding your hips, was the first to sink down, but encouraged you to straddle him as soon as he was fully seated with an encouraging tap to the back of your thighs.
It was your turn to pull away now, your dominant hand resting flat against the centre of Paul's chest as you gave him a good once-over, feeling his heartbeat beneath your palm.
Paul was leaned back, lips parted and shining, assumably from the spit you'd been exchanging, and his eyes almost twinkling at you in adoration.
Your heart was full of something you hadn't felt in a very long time, and it was all because of this sensual interaction.
You reached out with your other hand and ran your thumb over his bottom lip, his shallow breath fluttering gently against the skin on your fingers. You tilted his head up and kissed him again, and your fingernails just couldn't resist playing with his beard any longer.
Paul's grip on your hips tightened when you started doing that, and when you decided to take your other hand off his chest and start playing with his hair, he let out a very low groan against your lips, and to both of your surprise, his hips bucked up involuntarily against you.
He gasped at his own actions, and you pulled away to view the look of apologetic shock written on his face. His cheeks and neck were flushed, and his eyebrows were bent in worry, again.
"I-I promise I didn't mean to..." Paul's voice carried a hint of... shame, almost. You watched as he nervously toyed his bottom lip between his teeth as he tried searching his brain for something to say, but the effects of his drink and your sweet attention had him grasping for any type of clear thought.
But all of his attempts went completely out the window when you lowered your hips down and rocked them back against his, his head falling back against the sofa as his eyes rolled, a guttural moan rumbling from deep within his chest.
It was absolutely apparent that Paul's jeans were lacking the room they'd possessed a few minutes prior, and when you repeated the circular motion with your hips again, feeling him hard against your core, you were rewarded with another low growl from him.
"W-wait," Paul uttered weakly after a second, arms and fingers tightening at your hips to keep you from moving around and teasing him again, as much as he didn't want you to stop.
"I want this so much. I want you so much," he began, taking a beat to rake his eyes down your body as his tongue swiped against his own bottom lip. His gaze flitted back to your eyes, and he swallowed nervously.
"I don't want you to do this if you aren't, y'know..." you waited for him to finish his thought, and his round pink cheeks seemed to flush just a little more.
"If you're not okay with it."
You took a second to think on his argument. You and he were relatively fresh out of troubled relationships, and you both seemed to be hurting from the aftermath of said relationships...
But you were so lonely, too. And, to each other, you were simply beautiful, and respectful people, offering your... company... in a time of isolation for you both.
And it wasn't like there was any label for what you two were, either. All you and Paul needed was to feel wanted-- to feel loved.
And only if you could experience such a feeling for one more night in your life, Paul was offering now. And you were going to take it.
"I want this moment to last, Paul. If you're okay with making me feel wanted again, I am more than comfortable doing the same for you."
You could see him visibly relax when you said that, relief washing over his features as he reached a hand up to caress the back of your neck and bring you into a single, sweet kiss. You still couldn't get over how gentle and polite he was still being about all of this.
"We should really... go to my room," Paul suggested quietly after pulling a fraction of an inch away from the contact. You nodded your head, sighing "okay" as Paul closed the gap between you both just once more, only for a peck.
He let go of your hips and he reached for your hands instead, fingers intertwining slowly, and affectionately. You slid out of his lap, and Paul rose to his feet, guiding you without a hurry towards of the threshold of the den, where you stood to greet him unexpectedly just an hour or so before this moment.
The 45 on the record player had since finished playing the song, needle spinning needlessly in silence. Paul briefly resituated the player before continuing your journey one step at a time towards his bedroom, the heart in your chest beating erratically.
You climbed the stairs together, one dragging step at a time, and Paul led you around the corner of the hallway, pausing at the first room on the right. He glanced over at you, hand on the doorknob as he gave you another look. One that was asking a final, "are you sure?"
You placed your free hand over Paul's without a sound, and together you opened the door. He pulled you in for one more intimate embrace, lips on yours again before he pulled you into the dark room, gently kicking the door closed behind him.
And that night, you stayed with Paul. Hand-in-hand, bodies entwined, souls healing, loneliness fading away, and hopes of feeling whole again finally returning.
Being awake in the middle of the night had never been so gratifying.
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A/A/N: I hope you all enjoyed this! like I said, I can always whip up a part 2 regarding what happened behind those closed doors, so lmk if you're interested in that at all! Thanks for the support again and stay tuned for more works!
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