#✶ — › i love the validation — ⌜ SELF PROMOTION ⌟ | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

theambitiouswoman · 9 months

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Do you really love yourself?

Many times in the past, I believed I was operating out of self-love. However, it was only when I began focusing on personal growth and engaging in shadow work and inner healing that I came to understand that my previous perception was not accurate.

Sometimes, we believe we're being kind to ourselves because we do things that feel good or seem helpful at first. We might do these things because we want to feel better or think they're good for us.

To become aware that something might not be truly self loving, we need to pay attention to how things make us feel in the long run. If something we're doing ends up making us feel unhappy, stressed, or even harms us over time, that's a sign that it might not be coming from genuine self love. So, it's important to regularly check in with our feelings and reflect on whether our actions are bringing us real and lasting happiness and well-being.

These are some examples you may relate to, where we might think we're operating out of self-love, but it may not truly be the case:

Self-Care:

Binge watching TV shows for hours, thinking it's self-care, but it leads to neglecting other responsibilities.

Regularly indulging in unhealthy foods as a form of self-care, but it negatively impacts physical well-being.

Spending excessive amounts on shopping to feel better momentarily, mistaking it for self-care, when it strains finances.

Oversleeping every day, believing it's self-care, but it disrupts daily routines and productivity.

Isolating yourself from others under the guise of self-care, but it can worsen feelings of loneliness.

Skipping regular exercise, thinking you're prioritizing relaxation, but it affects overall health in the long run.

Using substances like alcohol to cope with stress, thinking it's self-care, when it may lead to dependency.

Personality:

Constantly seeking validation from others to feel worthy, assuming it's part of your personality, but it indicates low self-esteem.

Always being the peacemaker in conflicts, believing it's your personality, but it might be suppressing your true feelings.

Refusing to ask for help in any situation, thinking it's part of your personality, but it can hinder growth.

Being overly competitive and comparing yourself to others, thinking it's just your personality, but it can lead to dissatisfaction.

Being excessively introverted to the point of avoiding social interactions, thinking it's part of your personality, but it may contribute to isolation.

Always putting others' needs before your own, assuming it's your personality, but it could be detrimental to your well-being.

Constantly seeking new experiences and never committing to anything, believing it's your personality, but it might hinder progress.

Career:

Overworking and not taking breaks, assuming it's necessary for career success, but it leads to burnout.

Staying in a job you hate because it's what you're used to, thinking it's for the sake of career stability, but it prevents growth.

Avoiding asking for promotions or raises, assuming it's humility, but it might hold you back professionally.

Pursuing a career path solely for financial gain, thinking it's practical, but it can result in dissatisfaction.

Accepting workplace mistreatment in the name of job commitment, thinking it's dedication, but it's detrimental to mental health.

Focusing solely on climbing the corporate ladder, believing it's the key to success, but it may lead to neglecting other important aspects of life.

Not pursuing opportunities for skill development, thinking it's contentment, but it can hinder career advancement.

Romantic Relationships:

Ignoring your own needs to constantly please your partner, believing it's love, but it leads to codependency.

Staying in a toxic relationship because you're afraid of being alone, thinking it's love, but it harms your well-being.

Sacrificing your own dreams and goals for your partner's aspirations, mistaking it for love, when it hinders personal growth.

Avoiding conflicts at all costs, assuming it's love for peace, but it prevents healthy communication.

Idealizing your partner and overlooking their flaws, thinking it's love, but it prevents realistic understanding.

Rushing into a new relationship immediately after a breakup, thinking it's moving on, but it might be avoiding emotions.

Disregarding your own values to align with your partner's, believing it's love, when it compromises your authenticity.

Friendships:

Going along with friends' decisions even when you disagree, assuming it's loyalty, but it might lead to resentment.

Pretending to enjoy activities you dislike to fit in, thinking it's maintaining friendships, but it's not authentic.

Ignoring your own needs to help friends excessively, believing it's friendship, when it impacts your own well-being.

Staying friends with people who consistently bring you down, thinking it's loyalty, but it negatively affects your self-esteem.

Avoiding confrontation with friends, assuming it's maintaining harmony, but it might lead to unresolved issues.

Letting others take advantage of your kindness, thinking it's friendship, when it's actually being taken for granted.

Faking interest in others' conversations to avoid feeling left out, thinking it's friendship, but it prevents genuine connections.

Personal Growth:

Staying in your comfort zone and avoiding challenges, thinking it's self-preservation, when it hinders progress.

Setting unrealistic goals for personal development, believing it's ambition, but it can lead to disappointment.

Constantly seeking external validation for your progress, assuming it's self-improvement, when it should come from within.

Overloading your schedule with self-help activities, thinking it's maximizing growth, but it might cause overwhelm.

Avoiding reflection on your mistakes and shortcomings, thinking it's self-compassion, when it prevents learning.

Perpetually focusing on your flaws without celebrating achievements, thinking it's humility, but it can lead to low self-esteem.

Ignoring your emotional needs in favor of pushing through challenges, assuming it's resilience, when it might hinder emotional well-being.

Physical Health:

Skipping Meals to Lose Weight: You might think that skipping meals will help you lose weight quickly, but it can lead to nutritional deficiencies and harm your body's energy levels.

Overexercising: Working out excessively with no rest can seem like a way to get fit, but it can lead to injuries, exhaustion, and even weakened immunity.

Crash Diets: Trying extreme diets that drastically cut out food groups might seem like a fast way to lose weight, but they often lack important nutrients and can be harmful to your body.

Ignoring Sleep: Prioritizing work or entertainment over sleep might seem productive, but sleep is crucial for your body to recover and function well.

Relying on Supplements Alone: Thinking that supplements can replace a balanced diet might seem convenient, but they're meant to complement, not replace, healthy eating.

Ignoring Pain: Believing that toughing it out through pain or discomfort is a sign of strength, but it's important to listen to your body and seek medical attention when needed.

Not Staying Hydrated: Forgetting to drink enough water might not seem like a big deal, but proper hydration is vital for many bodily functions and overall well-being.

#self love journey #self development #self esteem #self worth #self help #self improvement #self love #personal improvement #personal growth #personal development

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comicaurora · 3 months

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Why do you never want to talk about aurora in videos and streams, even if requested? Do you just feel disingenuous, or is it something else?

Because self-promotion makes me uncomfortable, I don't want to obnoxiously self-aggrandize, and part of me still feels like the worst crime I can commit is inflicting myself and my work on other people. I've been smacking that part down over the years, but it's not wholly gone just yet.

Funny story about that. I was just a panelist at the sci fi fandom convention Capricon this weekend, and I was on two panels about comics with Gene Ha, a comic writer and illustrator who's been in the superhero comic business since 1993. Most recently he worked on Wonder Woman Historia, a "what the amazons were up to pre-Wonder-Woman" comic volume. He had a sketchpad with him and spent his time on the panels when he wasn't talking drawing portraits of random audience members and then slipping away from the table to hand them to them. Absolutely lovely man.

When we were making small talk before the panel, he leaned over and said, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, "By the way, I checked out your webcomic this morning, and it's really good!"

He then proceeded to relentlessly compliment my grasp of paneling, flow, and readability, which was the most unexpected and unbelievably validating thing I'd ever experienced.

Then, when we were recommending comics at the end of the first panel, he drew up a little sign and propped it next to his nameplate - "comicaurora . com by Red!" - and brought it to the second panel we were on to reiterate the point. And the whole time I was comedically cringing into a ball, I was like "maybe… I don't need to be cringing into a ball about this……?"

It was very, very kind, and though I have difficulty taking compliments because it makes the imposter syndrome goblin that lives in my brain cackle madly on its throne of skull, I 100% believed his sincerity. A legitimate professional and pillar of the industry - a neutral party who is not already a fan of me - says I know what I'm doing.

Wild!

#asks #behind the curtain

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warmmilku · 4 months

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🎊Agere New Years goals and Resolutions!🎊

🎉 Embrace age regression as a valid and positive coping mechanism!

🎊 Prioritize self-care practices that include age regression activities!

🎉 Surround yourself with a supportive community that understands and accepts age regression!

🎊 Explore creative outlets that connect you with your inner child!

🎉 Set aside dedicated time for activities that bring you joy and nostalgia!

🎊 Educate others about age regression to foster understanding and acceptance!

🎉 Practice self-compassion and avoid judgment regarding age regression!

🎊 Establish healthy boundaries to create a safe space for your age regression journey!

🎉 Celebrate small victories and progress in your age regression practice!

🎊 Engage in therapeutic activities, such as journaling or art, to express emotions

🎉 Connect with other cgs and regressors on social media platforms to share experiences

🎊 Prioritize mental health by seeking professional support when needed

🎉 Create a positive and comforting environment for age regression activities!

🎊 Experiment with different age regression techniques to find what works best for you!

🎉 Reflect on the positive impact age regression has on your overall well-being!

🎊 Share your age regression journey openly and encourage others to do the same!

🎉 Participate in online communities that promote age regression positivity!

🎊 Incorporate age regression into your daily routine to maintain consistency and balance

Happy New Year everyone! 🧡

I am so grateful for all 7,500 of you! I love and appreciate every single one of you! Here’s to a wonderful 2024! *cheers with apple jooce* 🧃

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neptunes-sol-angel · 6 months

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"She's a mannnneatttterrrr...." . I posted this for Halloween and I only have time to make this short, but if you guys like this topic and would be interested in me remaking with more piles and more in depth at a later time, then let me know!

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Pile One

Your killer seduction reminds me of the Kumiho from the show Lovecraft Country. The Kumiho is based off of East Asian mythology and is depicted as a fox spirit that shape shifts into a physically attractive woman that feeds off of men that they've lured in. When people feel inexplicably drawn to you, they think it's by how you sweet you come across or how soft you may appear in both your looks and mannerisms, there's this idea of submissivenss that they might get from you that may seem like a treat, but it's really the trick that's pulling them in. They're attracted to what you aren't saying about yourself. Your allure comes from the things that make you mysterious or the unseen things like your aura. They want to see the things that you conceal, what secret kinks and fetishes that you may have or in general, the secrets that you may know about them and others. Your gaze is sexually attractive, you could have fox or feline features, your movement and how you dress could be described as very vixen like or maybe this is the other side of yourself that people are hoping to see. It's not just how you look at others, but it's also what you see in others that people find erogenous. You could be clairvoyant and are able keenly and thoroughly tell a lot about a person by what you can see, people are wooed by this validation that you give them, it gives them an ego boost that actually creates a reversed effect where it's not you that feeds on people, it's them that feeds on you.

Pile Two

Your killer seduction reminds me of the Black Swan. You entice others to embody the side of themselves that they have been repressing. You satiate a person's drive both in sexual and non-sexual situations by fulfilling their subconscious fantasies. This can be a good thing that promotes people to take more risks in order to get the most pleasure that they can out of life and to awaken their authentic selves and potential unapologetically but this can also take a bad turn if there's no moderation and the person loses their grip on self-control to fall victim to obsessions and addictions. So your seduction is definitely a treat, people just have to watch out for too much of it.

Pile Three

Your killer seduction reminds me of Harley Quinn. You are the ride or die and the epitome of what true intensity is when it comes to love and how you seduce others. Your suggestiveness is both a trick and a treat. In the treat aspect, it comes from how you unconditionally love others. However, your attention and affection tends to go to the wrong people that will take advantage of it which can lead to your demise. Your heartbreaks awaken the side of you where you use your seduction to trick others, by playfully charming them but keeping them at arm's length.

#divination #intuitive #psychic #pick a card #tarot #spirituality #pac #tarotblr #pick a pile #pick a picture #the tarot community #tarot community

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antiodote · 2 years

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she can’t finish and they fight.

warnings: smut (18+), angst

•••

stress was coursing through her veins at every waking moment.

she had been feeling like this for the past two months. scoring a promotion at work meant a lot of things. it meant she got paid more, sure, but it also meant that she had more responsibility than ever before.

ever since her days at school, she craved validation; she needed somebody to tell her that she was doing good, that her efforts were not going unnoticed, that she did the right thing, and that she was good. she never quite figured out where that need came from, but she had an inkling that it must have something to do with the way her mother had raised her.

she, also, never quite figured out how to deal with it healthily, which is why all of her friends knew her as the archetype of a workaholic. she was working all the time and rarely had any time for herself, but she loved her work, so it didn’t seem like a big deal to her.

it was a big deal to harry, though.

harry, who was also a self-proclaimed workaholic, saw how much it was tearing at her and could practically smell the burnout from miles and miles away. it didn’t help that her boss didn't believe in words of affirmation and just piled on more work for her to do every chance she got. harry knew that it was eating away at her, he knew that her way of coping, which was not at all, would eventually come back to bite her in the ass. in any other situation he probably would have done something. he keeps telling her to take a break and to rest a bit; the hypocrisy of it doesn’t go unnoticed by either of them, though. truthfully, harry was also as busy as ever. with the release of his new album, movie promotions and public appearances, he rarely has time to rest himself.

before their lives got all too complicated, they had plenty of time to spend together, even with their already busy schedule. they’d go on hikes and cook and watch movies; they were a proper couple. happy and unbothered. shielded from any and all obstacles. maybe they both knew, deep down, that their honeymoon phase was coming to an end. to them, however, that seemed like it was light-years away.

and yet, here they were.

it was the umpteenth time that she had returned from work at an ungodly hour, even later than harry. he usually left to go to the studio after making breakfast for the both of them, and usually, neither of them would end up eating most of it. harry used to playfully bug her about her eating habits. he tried reminding her of the importance of three meals a day, every day. she brushed it off then and it was fine; now, however, it worries and agitates harry to no end. this morning she had left without so much as looking at it, once again. she bid her rushed goodbye and chose to forego a peck on the lips. she had forgotten so much lately that harry began to wonder if it had been on purpose, but since he isn’t the kind to ask for affection he guesses he will never know.

they meet for what feels like the first time that day in their shared bedroom. she comes in with her bag in tow and exhaustion written all over her features and it pained harry to see her like that. however, he too was feeling more than exhausted. it became harder and harder to feel sorry for her if he was being honest with himself. not when he felt like it was preventable.

“hi.”

“hello.”

silence.

“I’m sorry for coming home late again. I know it’s been happening too much. I don’t mean to…” she tried explaining herself as she did so often. harry understood and he wasn’t mad, but the defeat in his demeanour was palpable.

“it’s alright, came home late myself. how was work?“

“same old. how was the studio?”

“fine.” a lie.

harry had been having trouble writing as of late. everything he did write was either too sad to release or just not good at all. apparently, the way their relationship was falling apart seemed to directly affect his creative writing process. it was a mess, truly. he didn’t have the heart to tell her that though. he didn’t want to make her feel more guilty than she probably already did.

“okay, good.”

harry returned to reading his book, albeit halfheartedly, while she was busy looking at him - really looking at him - for the first time in ages. she is shocked to find him looking so… defeated? she wants to beat herself up for not noticing the prominence of his under-eye bags, the dullness of his skin, and even the way his hair looks unkempt and tousled. does she also look this restless? she realises, then and there, that they haven’t made proper conversation for the better part of 6 weeks, and she can’t help but feel like it’s her fault. she knows they have both been very busy, but had she made an effort to do something to at least save her relationship? she doesn’t think so.

“so, uh, we haven’t talked in a while, huh?” she sets her bag by the door and moves to her side of the bed, her side facing him while she removes her jewellery. harry sets his book down as well, hoping they would finally be able to break the cycle. the moonlight shines brightly into their bedroom window, illuminating the side of her face. if the situation was different, he might tell her how beautiful she looks, despite her visible fatigue. he doesn’t know what’s stopping him if he’s honest. what he doesn’t know is that when she faces him and sees how the warm light from the lamp on his bedside table illuminates his features, her breath oh so subtly hitches, too. she thought he was beautiful, always. like the sun, always illuminating. unfortunately, his light seemed dull lately.

fire and ice; the sun and the moon facing one another. that’s what they represent. so close, yet so far away. they used to dance in unison, but they seemed to have forgotten how to dance. why? what happened to them? it felt like they both knew, and yet? they didn’t know what to do.

except she thought she did.

she moved closer to him, fully sitting on the bed now. her blouse pulled out of her trousers, her hair down and her glasses thrown aside somewhere. facing him, she took the book out of his grasp and bent over his stretched-out legs to put it back on his nightstand. she made sure to let her chest graze over his crotch. she wanted to dance again, in a different way. a way they used to have perfected. the last time they danced was way too long ago, though, but she hopes they still remember the steps.

he held his breath, not quite knowing what to do just yet. where was this going? he wasn’t entirely sure and he didn’t want to risk fucking it up. this was the first time she had been close to him in what feels like forever and he missed her touch so much that it hurt. she moved back into a seated position, facing him.

“tell me something. anything. I miss your voice.”

he looks at her, puzzled. what could he tell her? he wrecked his brain for something, anything to tell her. something that wasn’t too boring or too sad. he found himself feeling insecure, for whatever reason. so, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, he decides to listen to his heart and let his mind stop working for a bit. this was his love, he would be fine. he knew how to talk to her, he was fine. he was fine.

he opens his eyes again and speaks.

“well, mitch and sarah might want to try for another baby. they’ve been loving parenthood, it seems. I think it really suits them, too. and, uh, jeff and I have been talking about tour dates, which is always a hassle, as you know. oh! I might have to go to italy to reshoot some scenes for the movie. um, yeah.” his monologue was cut short by the sheer fact that he doesn’t know what else to talk about. the oxygen in the room seems to lessen by the second and his throat feels tight. why was he like this? could he not just act normal right now? why did he feel the need to talk to her about how he felt like they were falling apart? and how that was scaring the hell out of him? losing her seemed like such an unrealistic concept not too long ago, whereas now it feels like it’s just around the corner. he feels constricted and he hated every second of it.

“that’s nice, hm? mitch and sarah having another baby? god, I hope it works out for them. it would give you more godfather duties.” she tries to lighten the mood and it works, if only for a second. harry wants to ask her about her day, as well. however, listening to her work struggles right now would be sure to set him off, so he decides against it. and thus, silence falls heavy upon them, once more.

“what happened to us, love?”

he spoke up, his voice sounding uncharacteristically little. he voiced his fear.

here we go.

“I used to be able to talk to you for, what, hours? without any problems. but now it just feels so…different. why?”

he faces her and finds an apologetic look on her face, probably mirroring his own. they felt defeated. lost. what did happen to them?

she sighed heavily, not even trying to deny anything. “I…I don’t know, harry. I don’t know.” a beat of silence lingered again. “I miss us. I miss you, all the time. I don’t like what happened to us, it’s like we drifted apart, don’t you think?” he says. his heart feels like it could burst out of his chest at any given moment with how nervous and stressed he felt.

“do you still love me?” he asks, knowing just how pathetic he must sound. she replies instantly. “of course I do, harry. always. do you still love me?”

“yes, I do. so much.”

her fear turned into desperation. she had to do something, and she had to do it now. she moves closer to him, their faces now mere inches apart. she laces her hand into his own, slowly and carefully, afraid to do something wrong. she looks at him once more and tries not to wince at how dull his eyes looked. if she dwelled any longer on how it might have something to do with her, she might collapse. so, urgently, she moves their joined hands onto his lap.

“good. let me show you how much I love you then. please, can I?”

their hands apply pressure on their resting spot just over his crotch, clearly sending a message. he closes his eyes and relishes the feeling. he felt like they should talk first, to work through any of the problems they might be experiencing. he couldn’t bring himself to do it, though. because right now, the only thought in his mind was how he needed to feel close to her, immediately. he felt selfish, but couldn’t bring himself to care. so he nods. “please.” and in an instant, she moves closer.

their lips attach. relief floods him.

there she was. his moonlight.

heat surrounds them, quicker than they’d care to admit, and everything felt good, for once. the world stopped, and it was just the two of them. nothing else mattered. he was feeling her again, and it was good.

she moves to sit on his lap with her thighs surrounding his own. her hands migrate to his scalp to tangle them through his hair, the way she knew he liked. he moved his own hands to her blouse, desperate to take it off, desperate to feel her. he undoes the buttons and slides it off her shoulders, removing her hands from his head in the process. their mouths move in unison, their movements are rushed and desperate. they needed this. they needed to feel connected like only they knew how. in a rush to feel her skin, he peels off her sports bra, leaving her in nothing but her dress pants. his hands find her chest and in an instant, he starts playing her like an instrument, gaining a plethora of sweet whines from her. she grinds down on him, feeling the growth in his trousers. everything is hot, rushed and filled with need; their arousal growing by the second. she detaches her mouth from his to take a breath, a string of saliva connecting them, still.

“fuck, harry. please, please. I need… I need, god-“

he didn’t wait for her to finish before attaching his mouth to her nipple, sucking harshly. a high-pitched whine leaves her and she grinds down harder, making him groan. he uses his other hand to play with her other breast, and when he moves his head to lick a bold stripe in between the valley of her chest, squeezing her tits in his way, he wonders if this is heaven. this, or the treasure between her thighs. as soon as the thought enters his brain, he detaches himself from her chest in an attempt to move them into a laying position.

“need to taste you, angel. please, let me-“

“no, harry, please. need to feel you. need to feel you inside, please. need to feel full.”

they make eye contact and he contemplates her words. “you can taste me whenever else you want, honey. just need to feel you in me now, okay?” she says, with her hands in his hair once more. he closes his eyes and basks in the comfort she radiates. she was truly remarkable. and truthfully, he couldn’t possibly think of a better sensation than to be berried deep within her walls.

“yeah, okay angel. let me make you feel good, hmm?”

“yes, god yes. thank you, thank you, thank you.”

she lifts herself from her position on his lap and steps off the bed. they simultaneously remove any remaining articles of clothing, leaving nothing but naked skin in sight. she kneels onto the bed once more, resuming her previous position. harry's hands roam all over her body, squeezing her behind and finally resting on her love handles.

“you’re unbelievable. so fucking stunning, god. kiss me, please.”

she grants his wish momentarily, letting his tongue roam freely. they were in ecstasy, purely and utterly consumed with one another. she blindly reaches for his length underneath her, gripping him at the base and gifting him a few languid strokes. her thumb finds his tip and she starts spreading any and all precum around, preparing him. he moans, no, whines into her mouth, his eyes screwed shut in utmost pleasure.

“fuck, fuck, fuck. please, baby, I can’t take it. let me feel you, now.”

she smiled, kissing his nose. she loved his eagerness and how he wasn’t afraid to show it.

“I’ll give you what you need, don’t worry, baby.”

and so, she moves to sit down and truly, she couldn’t wait to feel him, as she had really, really missed it. terribly so.

she guides him inside, preparing herself mentally for the highest form of pleasure she had ever experienced-

or…not?

“ah, fuck! wait, hold on-“

she couldn’t get him inside, but not because of his size. no, she just so happens to be bone dry. no arousal was surrounding her, not even a little bit. this had never happened before, and it left her at a loss. she looks down again, just to make sure that she was feeling it correctly. and there it was, nothing. she should be dripping by now, especially with how turned on she was, but alas, the contrary seemed to be the case.

she looks at him now, helplessly, and at a loss for what to do.

“what’s wrong, you okay? not feeling up to it? we can stop-“

“no! no, absolutely not. I want this so bad, you have no idea. I don’t know what’s happening, honestly. I- I- maybe I can- or we could-“

he grabs her by the jaw, grounding her for a moment. his eyes search for hers, offering reason and calm, and relief floods her as she sees how his eyes look more alive than they did a few minutes ago.

“hey, hey, calm down. you’re okay, petal.” a kiss. “let me just get the lube, yeah? don’t worry about it.” she takes a deep breath. “yeah, okay. thank you.” another kiss.

he reaches over to his bedside table, opening the little drawer underneath. located in-between packs of condoms, some melatonin tablets and an emergency pack of cigarettes, he finally found what he was looking for: the small bottle of water-based lube. neither of them exchange words, just glances, as he shuts the drawer, opens the bottle, and squirts some of the product on his hand. once the bottle is closed and set aside, he uses his clean hand to guide her slightly upwards, freeing him from the delicious confines of her thighs. he then spreads the product on and around his length, wincing slightly at the cool temperature. once he feels like he’s coated himself sufficiently, he guides her down once more.

“tell me if it hurts and I stop, okay?”

she nods.

deep breaths. shaky hands. unsure glances.

and then…

“oh my god.”

euphoria.

“holy shit, baby. fuck. so fucking perfect for me, aren’t you? jesus.”

she sinks all the way down his length, filling her up to the brim. her head is thrown back and her mouth agape in pleasure, not a single sound escaping her for the first few moments. that is until he starts thrusting up and into her.

“good god, harry, fuck!” the delicious stretch of her walls made her want to scream, a feeling that she doesn’t think she could ever get tired of. “please don’t stop, oh my god!” her words only encouraged him more, making sure to keep his pace steady and to hit her spot every single time. with her head still thrown back and her jaw slack, harry took the opportunity to just stare at her pleasure-filled face, which only got him off more. she always looked beautiful, but like this? she was unbelievable. he thinks at that moment that he should probably write a song about it.

a particularly hard thrust made her snap forward. “fucking hell, I feel you in my tummy.” she laced her hands around his jaw and rested her forehead against his own, staring deeply into his eyes and stealing the occasional kiss. harry took this moment to steady her hips and thrust up into her with such vigour, that her eyes rolled all the way back into her skull. she had to wrap her arms around his shoulders and hug him close to stabilise herself. and then, something weird happened.

usually, with the way he was pounding into her and with how he was moaning straight into her ear, she would be done in seconds. however, now that his face was no longer in her line of sight, her mind started clouding itself with other images.

“make sure you get this back to me by the end of the day. no more slacking off.”

she squeezed her eyes shut. this couldn’t be happening, not now.

“you have to do this over entirely, this is not what I had in mind at all.”

god, no. no, no, no!

“this is unbelievably sloppy, you cannot be serious, right? you’re staying late today, this is unacceptable.”

what the actual fuck was happening?

“baby, you okay?”

her eyes opened wide in an instant. he tried prying her arms away so he could look at her properly. she, however, only hugged him closer.

“yes! yes, I’m good. so fucking good.” she made sure to make her voice extra sultry, grinding down on him to make it all more believable. she cannot let him know that she got ridiculously close to having an anxiety attack in the middle of what was supposed to be mind-boggling sex.

he couldn’t help but groan at her actions, however, he continued. “you sure? your heart is beating very fast. do you- ah!- do you need some water, maybe?” he tumbled over his words as she made sure to squeeze her walls tight to shut him up.

“I’m okay, I don’t need anything. just need you to make me come, please.” she continued squeezing him, both with her arms and her walls until he was putty in her hands. no more words left him as he started thrusting up into her once again, moaning at the sensation her delicious pussy was giving him.

“you feel fucking unreal right now, angel. how do you feel, tell me? please, god, tell me.” he was begging for her, another thing that could usually make her come in an instant. right now, however, she really didn’t think that it was going to happen anytime soon.

how was she feeling? well, for starters, she was feeling embarrassed and confused because somehow, she didn’t get wet when her hot shot of a boyfriend practically devoured her tits and called her angelic, especially because she thought she was super turned on to begin with. and as if that wasn’t enough, she was now drowning in mental images and intrusive thoughts of her workplace and her bitch of a boss, which was the very thing that is currently tearing at her relationship. and she worried, that if she doesn’t get her shit together immediately, she might not come at all. so, fake it till you make it, she guessed.

“fuck, harry, I feel so fucking good. y’make me feel so. fucking. good.” slurring her words and repeating simple sentences; that should be enough to convince him that it’s genuine. she was trying to get into it again, but so far, nothing. she made sure to grind down and twist her hips how she knew he loved. on top of it all, she nibbled at his neck, jaw and ear to really get him going. and she knew it was working when his whines got louder with each thrust.

“shit baby, you feel bloody fantastic. please, god, tell me you’re close, need you to cum f’me.”

he was begging and whining for her like that was his sole purpose in this life, which made her feel all the more guilty for how her body was not reacting at all. he could very well be stroking her thumb right now, and it’d probably have the same effect. but she was determined to make him feel good, both physically and mentally, because he deserved it. the last thing she wanted to do was to make him feel guilty about something that he had nothing to do with.

so, she did what any other stupidly in-love woman would do: she faked her fucking orgasm.

“harry, god, fuck, I’m so close- I-“

“yeah, angel? let go f’me, get my cock all wet, c’mon.”

and that’s exactly what she did, or at least, tried to make him believe.

“god fucking- ah!”

and with all the core strength that she had, she squeezed her walls incredibly tight around him. she even tried to put some pressure on her bladder to maybe release some fluids, just to make it more believable. she was all too aware of his eyes on her, staring in awe at her alleged release. and just like she hoped it would, it triggered his own release just mere moments later.

“baby, fuck! that’s it, good god, that’s- oh!”

warm fluid filled her to the brim and she thinks under any other circumstances, the sheer intensity would’ve had to trigger her own orgasm. and yet, there she was.

shame was making her blood run cold, goosebumps littered her skin and she had this sudden urge to get out of the room to forgo any awkward conversation, but she knew she wasn’t going to be that lucky.

“you okay?”

he ripped her out of her thoughts in an instant, and suddenly he was facing her. his face was soft with pleasure, a post-orgasmic glow etched his features and a tired smile was gifted to her. he looked relaxed, comfortable and most of all he looked really, really happy.

she could not mess this up.

“yeah, I’m good. you?”

“very much so, angel.” he moved his hand to her cheek and oh so very softly moved any stray hair away from her face and tucked them behind her ear. the silence around them felt heavy, almost deafening to her. to him, however, it was pure bliss.

they stared at each other until it became unbearable for her, so she tried to move but his hand on her waist stopped any movement in its tracks.

“wanna cuddle for a bit?”

it became apparent to her that he was holding on to this sliver of positive energy they had created. she felt flattered over the fact that he wanted her around. the feeling however quickly dissipated and was replaced with guilt, shame and fear. she had to be by herself for a bit, she needed to get her head straight.

“let me just do my thing in the loo really quick, okay? i’ll be back before you know it, darling.” she reasoned. he nods, gives her a chaste kiss on the lips and nose, and lets her go. a hiss leaves both of them as she removes herself from him and she makes sure to keep the mess to a minimum. without looking back, she quickly walks to their shared bathroom, locking the door behind her. as soon as her bum hits the toilet seat, the tears flow and the shame begins to manifest itself into a big, green monster in her mind. how could she do this? how could she lie to him about something as stupid as this? more importantly, why could she not come? as the questions multiplied, the answers came short. she never wanted to be this person, and yet, there she was. does she tell him? does she keep the lie going? does she pretend to be so tired and fall asleep as soon as her head hits the pillows? she doesn’t want to do any of those things. instead, she selfishly wants to bask in the warmth radiating from her boyfriend, now that he is in post-orgasmic bliss. maybe she’ll be selfish for once if her mind allows it.

“oh god.”

frustration is now emanating from every pore of her body and she decides then that she has to leave this bathroom before things start looking suspicious. so, she finishes up, takes a deep breath and does not dare to look at herself in the mirror as she leaves.

she comes back to their bedroom and is momentarily confused when she finds him in his boxers and surrounded by a cloud of smoke. his back was facing her as he leaned over the railing of the balcony, shoulders visibly sagging with every breath.

“h? why are you smoking? everything okay?”

harry is by no means a smoker. he’s the kind of person to only reach for them when he is going through heavy emotional turmoil. he wouldn’t even smoke when he drank, so this scene was more than upsetting to her. especially because she already had an inkling of what could have possibly caused this action of his.

he turns around, the lazy smile no longer to be seen. instead, his eyes look even more dull than before and his cheeks have a rosy tint to them, almost like he just finished crying himself. she felt her heart sink and suddenly becomes increasingly aware of the severity of the situation.

this was bad.

“why don’t you tell me who you’re cheating on me with, darling.”

•••

a/n: hiiii, i’m back! sorry it took so long, i’ve been super busy with preparing for my move and also seeing harry in hamburg (and getting covid </3) anyways, this needs a part two, but that isn’t quite finished yet. this is also very different from anything else i’ve ever written before, so any feedback is truly appreciated!!!

4.7k words, not proofread (sorry!), lowercase intended

#harry styles smut #harry styles blurb #harry styles one shot #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x reader #harry styles concept #harry styles au #harry styles drabble #harry styles angst #harry styles x you #harry styles series #antiodote

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nudibutch · 2 months

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gonna be as nice as i can when i say this. this whole post is infantalizing. let the baby voice out? allow me to let my "adult voice" out, because that is what i am, an adult. that's what we ALL are, adults.

lately on tumblr ive seen an uptick in two extreme dichotomies of femme posts: butches are violent angry daddies that should fuck you hard and merciless and mean, or butches are just sooooo cutie uwu baby-wabies that cant think for themselves and are just soooo so cute to hold and have and pet while trying to give you aaaaall the attention you could ever want >////<

both dichotomies are objectifying, and quite frankly, demoralizing. ive been in the tumblr b/f community since 2019, and this cultural shift is really alarming. i see young butches reblogging these posts and worry that they wont be able to identify objectification when they see it. furthermore, i genuinely worry that theyll integrate this objectification into their perspective of b/f dynamics, and completely miss out on the real ways and feelings of being seen as butch, which is so much more wholesome, validating, loving, and most importantly, respectful than the posts ive been seeing lately.

if femmes keep treating butches like this, expressing their desire for butches like this (in an objectifying, and ultimately self-centered fashion), i fear we will soon see a cohort of young butches that will be reckoning with the damage to their own self-value, self-confidence, and comfort in their sexual and personal identities. stop promoting posts like this. think about how these kinds of posts impact butches, and call it out when you see it. if our community continues to promote and not correct this kind of behavior, it is going to cause some deep damage in the long run.

#i saw this post on someone else's blog and tried to reblog but couldnt (interesting) so i am posting here.#i am really mad.#and anyone who knows me personally knows that it takes a LOT to get me this angry.#this is important. we have to stop this now. for the sake of our community #we need to grow from this. we need to grow OUT of this mindset.#commentary

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luxxuriantt · 1 year

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The journey of 2023 Wonder how 2023 will change you? Choose below.

Pile one- Are you healed or just distracted? nine of sw, ace of wands, the kight of cups, the six of wands Either in 2022 or at the moment reading this, you struggled with anxiety or depression. I think this pile was not feeling good enough or they were too scared about what the future holds. You may have wished to experience more, to accomplish more, some situation in your life, were causing too much worry and keeping you from a good nights sleep. A cluttered and overstimulated mind, overthinking every little moment and being overly judging of your every step. I overall see lots of anxiety,exhaustion and worries. If this is the case, then pile one, 2023 is going to be your phoenix year. I see you regaining your will and your spark, you will take life in your hands again and start living it to the fullest. Through out the year, i see most of you exploring new horizons and making bold moves. Someone is going to start a new hobby or a job that they enjoy and for some i see relocation or starting college/university. Pile one, you will start taking more care of your body, paying more attention to your habits, diet and physical activity, this leading to you really glowing up. This year will make you become more creative and expressive, if you do make art, you will show it more, and for the others, you wont hold back in being yourself and doing/saying what comes to you naturally. Lmao i also feel like this group will put themselves out there and actually attract suitors and possibly some fun affairs and one night stands. Ypu may meet a future romantic partner. At the end of the year you will like you really succeeded,you are now bold, unapologetic, confident and glowing. pile two- Good news the queen of pentacles, the ace of swords,the eight and nine of pentacles

Talk about making money pile two lmao. This upcoming year, is gonna make you really focused on your career, on your studies, self worth and health. I do believe that a major lesson you will learn is what real confidence and self worth feel like. I do feel as tho many of the people who will choose this pile have confidence, but it is not coming from the inside, rather from external validation, so in 2023, you will start feeling comfortable in your own skin, and it is not going to matter with whom you are and where you are. Your mindset for a lot of things will change, you wont come from a space of lack anymore, you will start realizing what you have and feel more grateful. This will lead to more opportunities and it will be muuuch more easy for you to receive the universes blessings. Many will start loving their physical body, start taking more care of it. Skin and hair care, healthy diet and sleeping schedule, outfits that suit your tone and body, being picky with whom you share the space and energy, all that good stuff. Now like i said, there will be a lot of focus on your career and studies and basically anything material or practical that is important for you, so expect promotions, rewards, high scores and recognition. The year itself, i dont feel like it will be a smooth ride, there might be periods of isolation or losses/ feeling lonely, but i dont see you giving up or stopping. You will definitely come into more money and some may even go on vacation or buy something nice that has always been on their mind. At the end of the year, you will feel much more secure and more proud, you will achieve your plans and you will be pleased for reaching your full potential.

Pile three- If you have a tumblr... the death ,the hierophant , the queen of swords and six of swords

This year will change you....internally, a total internal metamorphosis. I think that right now you are carrying many opinions and beliefs that are blockers in your life, they are stopping you from moving forward and being completely in sync with the God in you, you still are not aware of the depths of you and your power. I feel like there is a part of you that is buried underneath and you havent gone thru an ego death. Either some events will happen to you or you will witness something that might shatter your world. Something will happen that will push you to change from your roots. There are some limitations in your thinking process that put you in a box, or somehow limit your being, it almost feel like you arent trusting yourself and are holding back. What will happen is, you will change yout perspective and start viewing the world differently. You will strenghten your relationship with the divine and you will preach what you believe in. Its like purification of the mind, seeing the bigger picture and finding the truth. After this, pile three, you will be unstoppable. Your mind will no longer be clouded easily and i think you will move on from reocuring thoughts or patterns and finally let go. i get a little sad when typing this but believe me in the end you will be grateful.I also feel like i should tell you that you are protected, so dont worry about it.

Thats all, thank you for your attention <3

#pick a pile #pick a card #pick a picture #tarot reading #intuitive tarot reading #tarot

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elencr · 1 year

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#elencr .... focusing on : pushing through grief , escaping ones reality , dealing with past trauma , getting lost in ones own mind and wearing their heart on their sleeve.

adored & written by kiwi --------------- TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR THIS BLOG ARE : PARANOIA , DESCRIPTIONS OF INSOMNIA , MILD GORE/HORROR , AND VIOLENCE .

#quantum leap rp #star trek rp #tng rp #star wars rp #marvel rp #mcu rp #⌜ SELF PROMOTION ⌟ ✦ * · ˚ I LOVE THE VALIDATION.#⌜ QUEUE ⌟ ✦ * · ˚ JUST WAIT A LITTLE BIT LONGER.#:)#yes i am once again going to be annoying about this.

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loxalotl · 6 months

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Piltover is the problem (*Arcane S1 spoilers*)

Throughout Arcane, Jinx is torn between Vi's "Powder", and Silco's "Jinx". Both love her, but neither accept who she is until Silco's final realistion where he switches from "Jinx is perfect" to "You're perfect."

Something he was desperate to hear from Vander, who gives up on Silco, betrays him and leaves him for dead thinking he doesn't have the capacity to change. But Silco proves him wrong: "Is there anything so undoing as a daughter". Jinx did what Vander couldn't. Gave him something else to believe in. Focussed that anger and injustice.

And Silco did it. He paved the way for peace. And had a good argument for not handing in Jinx for the murder of a couple of guards when Piltover has been systematically murdering hundreds of children and adults alike in the mines etc.. Oh, but it wasn't them directly, so doesn't count? No. Their inaction was what pulled the trigger. And Jayce doesn't even consider being held accountable for the murder of that boy (again, irregardless of all the out-of-sight so out-of-mind deaths). If brokering peace is enough for him, it should be enough for Jinx and Silco too, particularly when Piltover's body count is so much higher.

When it comes down to it, Piltover are the worst kind of abuser. They're the government who acts all nice and shiny and righteous while quietly enforcing child labour, enabling destruction of the environment, gas-lighting anyone who speaks against them, and promoting an unsustainable and lavish lifestyle based on self-interest at the expense of others. The quiet, deep-rooted, insidious evil that points it's finger at any opposers screaming "look, big bad thing threatening our civilised way of life!"

And Vander and Vi are not the "good guys" either. They're another kind of toxic. The "normal" people with a saviour complex who don't understand/accept anyone different, and part of what pushed Silco and Jinx over the edge (because, yes, Silco and Jinx have crossed a line, there is no excusing that). Neither are the Firelights necessarily the "good guys". They are so focussed on infighting in Zaun that they seem to have forgotten about the root cause of their problems. You know, Piltover? The people who have been quietly murdering your families and loved ones for the past X number of years??? Jeez. Remember the bigger picture guys.

Now, we may have been robbed of the "Silco figuring out how to properly dad" in Season 2 as it doesn't fit into Riots universe (looking at you, AO3), but I can only hope it doesn't turn into the "Vi fixes Jinx" show. Jinx doesn't need fixing. She needs people to accept who she is, and access to mental health care so she can focus that brilliance into productive things. People can be not okay but still valid. Yes, Silco was a "bad guy", but he was also a product of Piltover's exploitation, suppression and abuse (hello? Can we address this please?), as well as Vander's betrayal. He was very deliberate in his cruelty. It all had a purpose. Zaun needed someone to step up as nothing else was working (hello Jinx). Was it the right thing to do? Morally, no. But was it the lesser evil that would overall result in the fewest deaths? Who knows.

The key takeaway for me is that Runeterra DESPERATELY needs access to good quality, free mental health services (as do we all). Also, the world could also come a long way if we a) try to be nicer to each other and b) take a closer look at those really in power ('cos there is a whole lotta grey out there).

But that's how I see it. And I think one of the great things this show has done has sparked these discussions on acceptance, equality, mental health etc. It's okay to not be okay. You're not alone, so just be nice to each other. We're all on this lump of space rock together, and for anyone out there who feels lost, I'm sending all the love and hugs in the universe💜

And yeah, watch this show. It's perfect.

#arcane #silco #jinx #lol #piltover's finest #zaun #zaundads #mental health #vi #vander #league of legends #rant post #projectingowngovernmentontopiltover #somuchgrey #piltover

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sleepydreams444 · 5 days

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Mental Glow up Affirmations

One of the key steps to a achieving a physical glow up is starting with a mental glow up. Positive coping mechanisms and stable emotional regulation skills are truly everything. Here are some affirmations to promote your own mental glow up:

I embrace challenges as opportunities for growth, knowing that I have the strength to overcome them.

I am resilient, and I bounce back from adversity with grace and courage.

I trust in my ability to handle whatever comes my way, knowing that I am resourceful and capable.

I cultivate a sense of inner peace and calmness that helps me navigate life's ups and downs.

I practice self-care daily, nurturing my body, mind, and spirit.

I choose to focus on the present moment, letting go of worries about the past and future."

I am worthy of love and support, and I surround myself with positive influences.

I honor my emotions and allow myself to feel them fully, knowing that they are valid and temporary.

I cultivate gratitude for the blessings in my life, fostering a sense of contentment and joy.

I am in control of my thoughts, and I choose to focus on the positive aspects of every situation.

I am deserving of inner peace, and I cultivate it within myself every day.

I prioritize self-care, nurturing my body, mind, and spirit with love and kindness.

#loa #loassumption #manifesting #self care #loablr #loa blog #loa tumblr #loa success #affirmations #glow up #law of manifestation #law of assumption #law of attraction #manifestation #manifest

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sai-lec · 8 days

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The Internet Tifosi

an informal reflection of online fan spaces by me, a recent member of the tifosi.

I love being part of the tifosi. I love the colour red. I love seeing the passion of the tifosi at races. I love Charles. I love Carlos. I love watching races and highlights from old team lineups I love the greats like Schumacher and Lauda and Prost I love Ferrari.

My path in f1 didnt start with Ferrari, it started with McLaren- my dad is a huge McLaren fan, he introduced me to Lando (and Carlos but primarily Lando) in lockdown and sure it didnt click with me right away; I watched some races with him, he showed me the highlights from the races I didnt watch with him (including several videos of Grosjean's infamous crash) and despite the fact that I wasn't heavily invested it gave us something to bond over. That September when I left home for university it gave us a reason to call each other. When I developed a genuine interest (after I decided I wasn't coming back home after I graduate university) my dad wasn't bothered by the fact that I had shown up at Christmas with a Ferrari hat on, in fact he took it off my head and tried it on himself; "do I look good as a Sainz fan?". From my dad introducing me to Lando, Carlos was the natural next step in immersing myself into the fan community. From Carlos, we found Charles and the Tifosi. I don't have many (or any) friends in real life with the same level of interest in Formula 1 that I have developed, naturally I found myself creating this blog hoping to find a community within online spaces that wasn't available to me in the digital world.

My experience within the tifosi has been... unique, to say the least. I have been engaged in online fan spaces since I was around 14- I made my Tumblr account in 2016 to talk about supernatural, before moving on to buzzed unsolved, and marvel and so on as my interests developed and changed. Within each of these communities I have found a group of people that I felt comfortable around enough to call them genuine friends. some of whom I still keep in contact with despite the fact that our interests have changed. that hasn't quite happened to the same extent with the internet's Tifosi; and there is a multitude of reasons why.

The 'Versus' Predicament

To be rather blunt for a moment- I have never been part of a community that has been filled with so much vitriol for other members, and I was part of the Marvel fandom when Civil War was released (team cap). In fact, it seem that the tifosi are constantly engaged in a Civil War of their own- devoted fans of Charles as the self-labelled Lecfosi and Team55 practically always appear to be at odds with each other. And publicly so.

It is natural for people to have a favourite driver- we've just discussed how ive come to find myself as a devotee to Team55. But as with other areas, fan spaces have seen negative impact in communication due to internet dependancy in recent years.

From my perspective, the issue appears to be a mixture of cancel culture and virtue signalling. Now cancel culture is in itself a manifestation of virtue signalling in which creators or whomever else face mass criticism and attempted deplatforming as the internet becomes aware of potentially problematic past or present behaviour; however given its internet context and usage I've elected to view it as a separate entity.

Internet fan spaces have regressed to a state of defensiveness- in order to promote and validate your approval of one subject you must justify why in comparison to another. This is where the effects of cancel culture come into play. Cancel culture reached its peak performativity during quarantine as the internet and social media became the primary method of protesting and spreading awareness of activism whilst maintaining social distancing and quarantining requirements. As morality became monitored and policed by a younger and younger average user base, it is natural that there was a bastardisation of the phenomenon resultant in the mass cancelling and calling out of any person who spoke or acted in a manner that wasn't deemed correct; not necessarily related to politics or activism at this point, I myself received an influx of mass hatred and cancellations to the point where I was borderline shunned by an entire gaming community for making a joke about everyone hating one of the event mini games ('whats everyones favourite game and why is it not buildmart').

This same mindset is so visibly present within the Tifosi today- both extremes find themselves comparing one driver to the other in order to justify their favour. For example, tensions have been high with Lecfosi and Team55 almost in a panicked state looking to justify why they chose to support their favourite driver with 'Carlos is gifted every achievement Charles would have beaten him if he wasn't held back ' and 'Ferrari fired the wrong driver' filling the comments of Ferrari's Instagram and Twitter posts. This has prompted fans to flock to defend their preferred driver, often in ways which contribute to the animosity. Drivers face this pseudo-cancellation as a result with twitter bios seeing additions of 'Carlos fans din' 'if you like CL16 unfollow me' after every race. Criticisms of the drivers themselves increase, they are placed under heavier scrutiny as the violence between fans increases leading to a never-ending circle of driver-to-fan hatred. it is seen as almost a moral failure within fan spaces to support the wrong driver.

I, personally, have witnessed arguments between fans in comment sections on tiktok- the most memorable being a 'share your favourite driver and why' tiktok in which a Carlos fan received comments of 'Well you know Charles is actually better because x y z'. (I'd like to point out this is not an antagonisation of Charles fans, but this is what actually happened nor am I excusing Team55 from the ability to make similar comment). The notable point here is that Charles was never mentioned, yet the mere fact of someone else preferring the wrong driver in this commenter's eyes lead to them purposefully targeting another Ferrai fan to chastise them on their decision effectively boiling the interaction down to 'you're not allowed to support this driver because I don't like him'.

This is where virtue signalling comes into play. For those unaware, virtue signalling is the public expression of opinion with the intent of alignment with a moral correctness. The internet especially in fanbases weaponises that frequently through the examples of 'dni of you support x' as discussed prior. The followup to that mindset is the feeling of requirement to discuss. For example, when a driver races poorly or is subjected to penalty, fan spaces will see an influx of posts demanding fans to defend their driver (How can you support him when he drives like that), mass criticising the driver (he doesn't deserve his seat why isn't he fired), or public statement of disapproval because of the social requirement to misalign yourself with the incorrect actions of another person without genuine belief behind the statement as oftentimes excuses will be made for their preferred person in a similar situation. At times it appears that the primary interaction of some people within the Tifosi is to engage in critical commentary on their disliked drivers.

Criticism? Or extreme negativity?

With call out and cancel culture leaving the political sphere it has severely impacted the positivity of fanbases as criticism becomes a primary, almost necessary, aspect of fan culture. Of course we talk about critical consumption in which you are able to analyse and evaluate the content which we consume and become aware of its biases and flaws, however this has snowballed to become criticise everything you consume. Thus, the animosity of the fan spaces rises once more.

Of course every driver is bound to face warranted criticism- the majority of the grid are socially unaware rich white men, they are destined to say or do something worth criticising. They are bound to say bitchy things and act in ways that you don't agree with because that is just the nature of humanity, everyone does these things. But that does not mean every single one of their actions are worth dissecting under the microscope. And the prevalent attitude of analysing drivers mannerisms, behaviours emotions and heat-of-the-moment radios and comments doesn't display the analytical eye a lot of people think it does.

A lot of attitudes in the 2024 spaces that I have personally seen have centred a Carlos negativity- there have been dire criticisms of the journalistic bias towards him across the first 3 races of the year. Of course, if you don't like him then you're bound to be tired of hearing about him. But what I found interesting was the theories being circulated that he was paying his way into the media or that there was a behind-the-scenes scheme to keep media interest on him. Now, a lot of people perceived this to be a theory based on the culture surrounding Sainz's family wealth and his father's influence when in reality it was likely to be because of the increased interest around his circumstances going into the season- no seat for 2025, rumoured negotiations with several teams, surgery and first non Red Bull win of the season. to analyse this situation critically is not to say 'well there must be a secret reason and I will investigate' but to recognise that journalism is reliant on attention grabbing headlines- a man with no job and no appendix winning a race while still in the post-surgery recovery period is exactly the kind of narrative that will garner clicks. It would have been the same had it have been any other driver in that specific set of circumstances. There is a difference between critical thinking and assumptive analyses and oftentimes they can become conflated in the desire to prove a point.

This is the issue- a lot of people engage analytically with media in order to suggest a particular narrative. Every person is subject to bias, and when that bias is unchecked it can lead to a lot of analysis that are reliant on theory, speculation and assumption in order to maintain the subconscious perspective of the writer. This is why we see a lot of people use demeaning nicknames towards Charles on twitter an simultaneously view Carlos as undeserving in instagram comments- the integral points of their perspective on the driver rest on the moments which will develop their narrative view of the driver as the lesser. Critical engagement cannot rest solely on one the positive or the negative, otherwise you failing to engage critically by cherry picking a perspective in order to maintain a narrative. That is tabloid journalism, or gossip, at best.

I Am In Misery

It is also just not healthy for you as a fan to consistently engage in negative commentary and discourse. I mean that seriously this is a PSA if your fan engagement sees your negative criticism and commentary of your disliked driver outweigh the time you spend enjoying your interest then you need to take a step back and reassess how you want to participate because that is not sustainable for your mental wellbeing.

This is not to say that you must never hate, you must never criticise or say anything bad about someone we all do it- it's natural. But you have to ask yourself if you truly enjoy using another driver to uplift your favourite. Aren't his accomplishments enough to validate him alone?

Ive noticed a complete lack of will to celebrate- in my inbox right now are maybe around 15 asks all talking about how I shouldn't be happy with this weekends performance or else I dont understand F1. I argue the inverse,

I understand F1. I understand that this weekend was not the best performance Ferrari had to offer. I understand the impact of the team racing each other and Carlos' aggression during the sprint. And I have mentioned as much. However, I choose to focus on the positive aspects of the weekend. The tyre management from both drivers was impeccable to gain 2 positions each and maintain them finishing on tyres that were 40 laps old. They made an excellent recovery from the mishaps in qualifying that ultimately earned the team and themselves more points. We maintain 2nd in the constructors championship and 3rd and 4th in the drivers. There are issues that need to be discussed and resolved but ultimately this is not the worlds worst performance.

F1 is entertainment. I want to win, I want to succeed but I also want to be entertained. My mental health has seen a series uptick since I decided to directly seek entertainment. Sure, the drivers shouldn't have been racing the way they were, it had the potential to put both cars in a detrimental position, but it sure does make things more interesting!!! There's almost a sense of parasocialism within the community- a lot of people are hesitant to look for relief beyond the emotions of their favourite driver, and subsequently view every race as a failure in some aspect (just outside of the podium, on the podium but not p1, could've done better if it wasn't for xyz) and that negatively affects their experience as a fan and for other fans who don't share that perspective. It's almost like people have forgotten to enjoy the race, they're so preoccupied with looking for something to criticise.

Now this isn't to say you're not allowed to enjoy critical assessments of the success of races. But thats not what the majority of us are posting (it might be what some of you think you're posting, but you're not). I love watching video essays on races that are done properly with acknowledgement and awareness of bias. I don't love reading posts along the lines of 'why this race actually sucked' (not a real example) because it's not built from an analytical or critical perspective, just a discussion of the race and outcome through a lens of destructive pessimism.

End

This behaviour isn't specific to the Tifosi, it's an internet wide phenomenon. But I've chosen to directly comment on it here because as I said, I've never sen a community with so much hatred for itself. As of 2024, we are all on the same team right now. We have the right to hold our own opinions of the drivers and express those. We do not have the right to argue on the validity of other fans preferences, we do not have the right to directly enter fan spaces (ie the main tags) and spread destructive negativity about a driver nor do we have the right to harass blogs for whom they chose to support.

The inherent negativity is so calamitous to the community. It perpetuates the infighting, it furthers the negative narratives we have constructed of drivers, it only contributes to divide the community as both sides earn reputations of being toxic towards each other. And to an extent, yes . It is true, and that is disappointing. You have the right to choose your favourite driver. However, Charles and Carlos are both talented drivers- there is no need to drag one down to uplift the other. It is instigating behaviour and I'm sure a lot of people comment in that manner purposefully.

Be aware of your parasocial connection to a driver. if you find yourself criticising a driver for an action that you would not criticise your favourite for executing ask yourself why you view the action as negative circumstantially. If you are only able to assess races based on what could have happened, what better could have happened then ask yourself if you find this enriching; do you leave race weekends feeling good and excited for the next race or soured because things might have been better under different circumstances. Don't ignore the problems, acknowledge them and say but what are the positives as opposed to letting the failures undermine the successes.

just have a bit of fucking fun once in a while PLEASE .

as an endnote: I do recognise that the majority of insights and examples I have given in this reflection have been at the expense of team 55, again I would like to reiterate that as someone who primarily finds themself in 55 spaces I a naturally experience a greater exposure to negativity towards that driver as it usually tends to be maintagged or sent directly to myself or other 55 centric blogs. Just as the CL16 community is more likely to be exposed to and remember hatred towards Charles. In no way am I insinuating that 55 fans are incapable of or have not acted in the the same nature, to Charles' detriment. The toxicity remains prevalent on both extremes of the community.

this is a mass response to the people in my inbox thank you for your patience I didnt want to answer like 15 different asks about everything in slightly different ways

#not proofread bc didn’t want to #formula 1 #carlos sainz #charles leclerc #f1 #ferrari

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somenerdfromwhatever · 2 months

Text

Nex didn't deserve to die.

Warning: This is a massive rant that deals with heavy topics. It's long, it's blunt, but I want to share this because quite frankly, it's sickening and I want to use my platform for good.

On February 19th 2024, I heard something that really drove me and others up a wall:

Nex was brutally murdered by 3 female bullies in their school all because they are human. With no help from their own school system to save them, it's no surprise why they deserve the criticism for their inaction.

Now why did I say, because "they are human" instead of "they are non-binary"? I'm not denying they are non-binary, as a non-binary myself it is disturbing to hear such awful news. I am not ignoring this critical information. They are valid.

Truth is, I want to highlight their HUMANITY because the LGBT community are humans like you.

I never met Nex personally, but I feel a deep connection with them as a fellow non-binary person. I know what it's like to face bullying, harassment, and discrimination for being who I am. Even before I came out as non-binary, growing up with autism, I know the pain. Middle School was a pain for me because of it, it led me to hate myself. I know what it's like to live in fear and pain, to struggle with self-acceptance and self-love. I'm happy that their family accepted them for who they are and I feel sorry for their loss as well. This shouldn't have happened.

The more I think about this, the worse it gets. If Nex was not non-binary, if they were just another student that day, how would the public react? Everyone would be outraged and demand justice! But because Nex was non-binary, I have seen a lot of people, a lot of DISGUSTING people, say that they deserved it and that they were NOT HUMAN. In fact, that is why I hooked y'all's attention by saying that they are murdered because "they are human". I want to make this clear: Regardless of gender identity, Nex's inherent humanity is first and foremost.

As I see those countless comments pile up minute after minute, hour after hour... all I can mutter is "why?"

How can anyone promote and celebrate a death of another human being for just being themselves? How can anyone love to deny the humanity of others because they expressed their souls for who they are? How can anyone celebrate deaths of others who love the same gender, who become trans, or non-binary? Even after everything is set and stone, literally how?

And if these "people" who hate them do believe in some god or religion, why would they be hypocrites to their own god? Didn't their god say "Love thy neighbor", and "Don't bear false witness"? How can they claim to follow their faith, when they violate its most basic principles? I have a dad who practices religion sometimes but not a lot, I told him about this and the hypocritical nature of some of these people. The best way he worded it is this: "they can't claim to love god if they bastardize their teachings. God will roll their eyes and send them straight to hell."

Is this what humanity is now? Celebrating the death of innocents who their "crime" is living their best life?

There is no political two-sided debate on this issue. In fact, THERE NEVER WAS.

We are human, just like everyone else. We are human, and we matter.

And if I can for a moment, I notice a common theme here when it comes to these horrendous acts:

For a lot of these people that hate the LGBT community but love freedoms like free speech, it is pretty telling how much these people care about themselves and not practicing what the constitution preaches. It's hilarious yet baffling. Remember the book bans? They love to say it's to protect the kids but their ulterior motives prove otherwise. They targeted government public libraries all across the country claiming that books who celebrate being different are a "cancer". It wouldn't be surprising if they cheered for KOSA, a sweeping censorship law masquerading as child protection, but in reality, aimed at tightening control over Americans like myself to limit our expression. They want to censor and silence our stories, our voices, our experiences. They want to erase and deny our existence, our diversity, our humanity. They want to ban books that feature stories that say it's ok to be different. They want to forbid us from wearing clothes that express our gender identity or challenge gender stereotypes, even if they are harmless and comfortable. They are afraid of "drag", which is just fabric and makeup, which is hilarious how they managed to get so worked up on that.

Even more hilarious is the fact that they "claim" to hate China, Russia, and other authoritarian countries for their censorship, but they are damn eager to emulate it here in the "land of the free". Passing laws that blatantly violate our rights and our constitution every day. How do they not see the irony? It's pretty god damn telling right? Almost as if their version of "freedom" is not free for the people, but free for themselves. Freedom of expression is not selective, it is universal. If you respect the right of others to have different political views, you should also respect the right of others to have different identities.

"Land of the free" am I right? By expressing these statements, you really are no different from the countries you claim to hate.

This world is a cruel place, and the people that are cruel are the most pathetic people of all. Especially those that:

Be afraid of people using rooms with toilets all because they are different.

Be hateful and violent towards people who are different from them.

Be ignorant and arrogant about the diversity and complexity of human nature.

Be offended over people wearing fabric and clothing that is different from the norm that promotes their expression.

I’m not taking this post down. Say what you want on what I think, but we tried explaining this to you many times, the facts are all there clear as day and clear as crystal.

We are human.

Rest in Peace Nex. May justice come to those that wronged you.

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