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mammonsturtle · 2 years

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U & Me Pt. 7(finale)

Sorry for the wait everyone, this is long overdue, we’ve made it to the end! I feel I might write a few bonus chapters with my replaced series to tie up any loose ends, but I can’t guarantee anything in the future.

So here’s a long one for the lack of getting this out sooner, thank you all for your patience and thank you for reading and enjoying this series!

taglist : @another-one-again @mammon-satan-blog @cynthiarlan @webanglikethat @gallantys @localbirdy0131 @sn0wf00x123 @crierofirony @fuyumi-star @peachyevergreen @ymjay @ennspostssmh @pomocoro @irisxiel @underratedbitch-number13 @zanpastries @la-diablas-thingz @fadinganchornight @its-a-dumpster-fire-babey @iwanttodieplz @rose-ly @kiuzoiu @missingnpc @petalpink-oink

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)

CW: General angst, unhealthy coping habits, starvation. *If I missed any, let me know!*

It was a rare occurrence for Lucifer and his brothers to storm the Demon Lord’s Castle, but it seemed the Prince and butler were expecting it. The last couple of days, the Avatars had been absolutely miserable now that you and Mammon were no longer in their lives.

Perhaps it was a lesson for them to realize what they had until it was gone.

All they wanted was you two to be back home with them, where you belonged. They knew they hadn’t treated you like the beloved members of the family that you were, but they wanted you back before they had lost you both forever.

“Lucifer. It’s unlike you to come over unannounced,” Diavolo greets calmly as he puts his cup of tea down, a small stack of papers at his desk. The opposite of what was expected. “Usually it’s me that comes over unannounced, much to your chagrin. Isn’t that right?”

The Prince now gazed upon six outraged avatars as he sat calmly at his desk and poured himself another cup. “If this is about MC and Mammon, as I’ve said to you before. They are living happily in the human world, and I am going to keep it that way.”

“None of this would have happened if you hadn’t proposed your stupid program.” Belphegor bitterly points out as Lucifer quickly holds the youngest back, “Lord Diavolo....We just want MC and Mammon back. Please.” The eldest’s pride departed from his very being as the eldest drops to the floor on his knees, the rest of the avatars following suit.

Diavolo lets out a ‘hmph.’ as he leans back in his chair, giving the brothers the same steely gaze back from Achemond’s induction. “If I recall, you and your brothers drove MC out yourselves. Even you, Lucifer attacked MC. What is it now? The fourth time? And from what MC has told me. Not one, not one of you bothered in defending them, nor stopping Lucifer. Except Mammon, he at least remembered his role as MC’s guardian.”

Lucifer audibly ‘tchs’ as he hears Diavolo rise from his desk, the screech of the chair’s leg dragged across the floor and the brothers flinch. The prince paces around the Avatars and lets out a low growl as Barbatos lets himself inside. “Apologies Young Master. I had tried to deny them access.” the butler apologizes as Diavolo shakes his head, “Hm. Barbatos, please read a report from MC to the brothers.”

Before the brothers could voice a protest, Diavolo quickly snaps his fingers, putting a silencing spell over them. “Go on then Barbatos. Let Lucifer and his brothers know how MC felt being replaced.” The brothers had no choice but to hear and feel your words as Barbatos clears his throat and begins to read.

“Report number...gods, how many has it been now? I’m sorry Lord Diavolo. I’m losing count with these reports, but it’s probably going to be the same as last week’s. And probably just the same as the weeks before that. I feel like a broken record at this point.”

“Lucifer and the brothers have obviously devoted all their time to Angel, constantly praising them as the perfect human exchange student. I suppose I was that to them once upon a time. They just moved on with Angel as if I’m not even here. But now...I’m just a waste of space here.”

“Mammon’s getting treated the same way too...And Mammon’s supposed to be Angel’s guardian too. But it seems he can’t fulfil that role, not with his brothers constantly bringing him down more harshly. I feel like the brothers want nothing to do with me nor Mammon anymore. If it gets worse, I hope you and Barbatos won’t mind if I ask that you look after Mammon for me. I suppose the novelty of having their dead sister’s descendant has overstayed its welcome. My time here is done.”

As Barbatos spoke, the brothers could only silently reflect on the past few months. Was it that easy to have you replaced by someone who clearly outclassed you in terms of skill and power? Angel might had made life easier for them in terms of looking out for them, but you had gone through the process of tirelessly fixing their family. You had seen plenty of the good and bad, and even died because of them. Angel wouldn’t experienced any of that, of course the brothers acted like those hardships were a thing of the past.

All of a sudden, Lucifer let out a choked gasp as Diavolo snapped his finger, the rest of his brothers gasping for air. “Do you understand now Lucifer? MC has decided for themselves. And Mammon chose to accompany them, he was always quite the loyal brother, wasn’t he?”

Having lost two more of the most important people in his life, and by now, his pride had gone with the words he would have rebuked at Diavolo. Lucifer kept his head to the ground once more, “Lord Diavolo. Please. We need to see them. They need to forgive us. Please.”

Diavolo lets out a grunted ‘hmph’, staring down at the Avatar of Pride as he had seen this form before, “That will be up to them.” He gives Barbatos a knowing look as a portal emerges.

“One chance Avatars. And that is all you will have.”

• - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

With the Avatars now standing before you, your grip on Mammon’s arm tightened as Mammon tensed. Maybe his hunch about the human plotting wasn’t too far out of the realm of possibility. But a quick glance towards the paled face of the other human and the low hisses from their familiar said otherwise.

Lucifer was careful in keeping the brothers from rushing you and Mammon as he clearly could see the distress from you and the hostility from his favorite brother. “MC. Mammon. We’re here to take you back home.” The eldest coolly responds as if he were scolding children.

“Why are you all doing here? You lot didn’t bother looking for me, no matter what I did. Never had you since the fall, you all could care for all those times I ran away from home.” he snarled at his brothers, glaring daggers at them.

Beel was the first of the little brothers to speak up, “MC...You weren’t serious about leaving the Devildom, were you?” he asked as if he was a shamed pup. “MC, Mammon...Don’t you want to come back home? We can be a family again.” he offers as the gentle giant’s tone was laced with guilt as Mammon remained unconvinced.

“Why?” Mammon growls, “You wanna look afta two burdens now?” he retorts as the little brothers gasp in shock. He could see their faces turn to worry the fact that Mammon was a human now settled in, would they really step up to look after two humans under their care?

“I don’t even know why you’re all here. Especially you of all demons.” You argued as you stood your ground in defiance, now standing with Mammon and glared at Lucifer in particular. “We’re only doing what you told us to do, Avatar of Pride.”

Lucifer felt your bite, hurt as he was at you both, he kept his composure. “And what was that MC?” he questions, perhaps still hoping you’d both come back. However, you would not budge.

“You told us to know our place, and we did. We no longer belong in Devildom with you all. It only took another human to show the true colors of demons, didn’t it? You all just easily pushed me aside once someone better came along.” You answer as their faces fell in response.

Satan steps forward as he could feel the wrath roll off both of you, “MC, Mammon. Please. We were wrong. Your place is back in the Devildom with us. We can fix this...And Mammon’s role of the Avatar.” Satan trembled as he gazed upon the demon who raised him, who, in return stared icily at him.

The last words Asmodeus had said to you both were insults that you had forgotten about, yet his words were fresh in his head. And for once, the bravado that he carried had been completely wiped out. “MC, love. Mammon. Please. We’ll do anything to have you home with us.”

“It was all Angel’s fault! If they weren’t here, we wouldn’t be having this problem!” Leviathan quickly interjects and the brothers murmur in agreement as the human between you and Mammon was put on the spot.

Angel’s fists balled as they glared at the brothers, “I’ve done nothing! You brothers brought this upon yourselves!” they called them out as their eyes widened and they fell silent for a moment.

An awful realization set in as Angel repeated their words, “I did nothing.” It was true, wasn’t it? They could have just said no to the brothers, they could have fought to have you and Mammon with them during their time in the Devildom. All of this could have been avoided and the state of the Devildom would have been the same for the past thousands of years.

Yet here they are. Mammon was no longer the Avatar of Greed, bested by a mere human.

“MC. Let us take care of that human and move on. We’ll be a family again.” Belphegor suggests as the brothers seemingly agreed on what they’d believed would solve all their problems. You could see how they were staring Angel down, as if they were dogs waiting for you to command them to sic them.

“Then it’s settled.” Lucifer turns to Angel, “Prepare to pay for your crimes-”

As if you’d let that happen and it’d fix all that happened in the last months.

“Bad dogs! Sit!” It was your turn to snarl at the brothers as their bodies had stopped in perfect sync. You commanded as their bodies obeyed, even the mighty Lucifer couldn’t fight back the power of your pact. You had forced them on their knees to look up at you.

• - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

“I’d watch what you say Belphegor. Once upon a time, I was that human. And no harm will come to Angel.” You told off the Avatar of Sloth as you stand in between the demons and Angel. There was fire in your eyes as Lucifer grunts in frustration, pride was not going to let a human direct him on what he needed to do to ‘fix’ this mess he and brothers had caused.

“MC!” The little brothers pleaded as you stare down at them, Asmo struggled against the pact as he was close to tears, “MC!! Mammon! Don’t you want to be a family again?!”

The former avatar looks at his brothers on the ground, it was some family alright. “Family?” he mutters the word bitterly as he stares at every one of them, “This ain’t the family I remember falling with.”

Angel shifted their weight as they spoke up, “MC. Mammon.” Their tone was steeped in guilt as they knew you could have set your demons upon them when they had offered you the chance to. You gave them a sympathetic look, you already knew a death wouldn’t restore the normalcy between you, Mammon, and the brothers.

“MC. Let’s get outta here.” Mammon takes you hand as if he could feel the waves of wrath roll off your shoulders, “Ya don’t gotta say a thing to them.” He frowns at the state that his brothers were in but you firmly shook your head.

“No, Mammon. I think I’ve held my tongue for far too long.”

You take a breath, you had always been so kind and patient with the brothers and the sins that dictated their every word and action. You had even been on the receiving end of them at times, perhaps it was their turn for them to taste your wrath.

“Now. All of you will be silent, for these are the last words you’ll ever hear from us.” You commanded as their mouths were sealed shut, only scared eyes gazed upon you both.

• - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

“I hope you are aware that a simple ‘I’m sorry’ will not easily fix this situation.” You reprimand them as you give Mammon a sympathetic look, “It’s because of you that Mammon’s chosen to live out the rest of his life as a human. And what the Devildom has now become.”

“I stayed because I believed I was still a beloved member of your family. But then I realized you all kept me around because I was a replacement for Lilith.” You stare down at them, especially at the eldest and youngest, “And none of you ever apologized for putting me in danger, much less apologize for my death.”

“You may have forgotten about what you all put me through,” You point at Mammon, “But he hasn’t. I was there, dying in his arms. And you all idly watched. The same family who treats Mammon like scum, purely of the sin that he was cursed with. I can’t believe he still calls you his family, you’ve abused and used Mammon for your own benefit, and yet he still loves you. If it were me, I would have left a long ass time ago.” You spat at them in disgust as your pacts glowed, the flow of your wrath palpable now to them.

“Humans are quite the novelty to demons, aren’t they? Until they lose their appeal.” You pace about in front of the brothers as you gave them a hard look. “First there was Solomon, an impressive all knowing wizard, with 72 pacts with demons. Then everyone got suspicious on who’d he add to his collection next.”

“And then I came along, an unsuspecting human who managed to tame the Seven Lords. All under the ruse of getting pacts to save this family.” You lament as you trace over a visible pact mark to the brothers, and stared at it in disgust. “I fixed a broken family, and what do I get in return? My own death and left abandoned for another. There’s no use having these if the demons I call upon couldn’t be bothered to aid me in my time of need.”

You glance over Angel, “Of course, I suppose they did whatever they could with their arsenal of talent just to survive. If I had an ounce of the magical talent they possessed, I would have done the same. Perhaps it’s because I’ve been here again that my soul no longer carries the shine that you all were so attracted to.”

“So of course I decided to leave. There’s was no use of me putting effort into relationships with people who no longer cared about me.” You look to your first man and give him a soft smile, one just for him. “Only Mammon stuck by my side. And he’s decided that’s where he’ll stay.”

Mammon gazes upon his brothers as he huffs, and steps in front of the downed brothers. All their pleading of wanting him back would have fell upon deaf ears as his glare of disappointment and contempt could only be felt upon.

“Listen...Yer my family...But I can’t forgive ya for whatcha did to MC. For what ya did all this time, and what ya all did to me for all my life.” Mammon began as he shakes his head. “This family never appreciated, nor loved me. Fuck. The moment I got my sin, you all treated me like the designated punching bag for ya own sins. I tried so hard to keep this family together since tha fall, but I’m tired of carrying you all.”

Mammon paces just as you did as it was time to let things off his chest. “Ya all treat me like ma sin is the worst thing in all seven layers of hell. But lemme tell ya something, all of yous are just as bad as me. So why do I get the worst punishments for ma sin?”

Mammon stared at his little brothers now as his lips quivers in apprehension. They were lucky he had kept his angelic kindness but now, the little brothers he loved so much were now on the receiving end of what they had put him through.

“Satan wrecks shit, Beel eats everything in sight, and Asmo brings home strangers to sleep with. Levi spends a shit ton of grimm on shit he doesn’t need, Belphie gets to cruise through life; cause he’s the baby of the family, and the baby always gets what he wants. And you, Lucifer, ain’t nothing more but a sadistic tyrant who chooses to beat the shit outta us when things don’t go ya way.”

“But when I steal and spend, when I give into my sin. It’s suddenly treason and the only way to fix it is to beat me or the fucking means is execution?” Mammon snarls at the last sentence, how many times had they threatened and terrified him into submission with that?

“You ain’t the little brothers I raised.” Mammon uttered in disappointment as he watched their faces fall, and turned to Lucifer, and he felt his shoulders fall. “You ain’t the brother I looked up ta, the one who I followed and fell with.”

“MC was the only good that came into my life, and I ain’t letting them go. You all, still treated me like shit, and MC always had my back. They’ve been there for me when you all brought me down. A human cared for me more than my own brothers.” By now Mammon’s tears had flowed freely as it had never occurred to them that their words actually affected him that badly.

“I’m through with this family.” Mammon finally seethed as he returned by your side. His blue eyes burned into their’s as tears hadn’t stopped flowing down his face. And it would be the last image of their brother that they would see him as.

You stare down at the brothers as you release them from the pact’s bindings, “You’ve heard him. He’s done with you all. And so am I. There is nothing more to say.” You both make your way to Angel and stand with them.

“MC. Mammon.” Lucifer spoke as by now, he knew nothing he said now would change your minds. Keeping still on his knees, Lucifer swallows hard as he speaks the last words, “Will you ever forgive us? I don’t care how long it takes, I have to know.”

You stay silent for a moment as the brothers followed Pride’s example, “...I don’t know. I know it’s not now, not in the foreseeable future.”

“Then we will wait. No matter how long it takes.” Lucifer answers as the brothers sadly gaze upon you and Mammon, knowing that they’d never be a family again. A portal opens behind them, as if their time with you was up by Barbatos’ command as the brothers were pulled in.

“Goodbye MC, goodbye Mammon. Until we meet again, we will wait for you.”

• - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

You let out a sigh of relief, you had overcome another obstacle provided by the brothers and you quickly find comfort in Mammon’s arms. “It’s over. It’s finally over.” You barely whisper as if the weight of the world had finally been lifted off your shoulders.

Mammon simply nods as he gazes upon your tired form, “MC..I can’t believe you actually felt like that tha whole time ya been livin with us.” He frowns, how could he have not picked up on it sooner. “I..uh..sorry. I couldn’t protect you, especially from my brothers.” he mumbles softly against the crook of your neck.

“No. Mammon, it was never your fault.” You hug him and melt into his embrace, “We’re free now, we don’t have to worry about them now.”

Angel clears their throat as they were aware that they were very much the third wheel still, “Will you ever forgive them though MC?” they ask as you looked thoughtful, and shook your head. “I don’t know. I just know it won’t be soon.” You gave Angel a half smile as you approach them and put a hand on their shoulder. “I still want you to know that I don’t blame you for all that’s happened.”

Brimmond chirps from Angel’s occupied shoulder, “Not even an ounce of blame MC? You haven’t forgotten that it’s because of us that the Devildom has now entered a new era?” You give the familiar a stroke across his head and shake your head, “No. I don’t I can. Besides, I know you didn’t mean for all of this to happen.”

“Oi! I’m still ‘ere ya know?” Mammon interjects as he frowns, but the thought wasn’t too far off from his deepest thoughts. “But...huh. It’s weird ya know? Not having them 24/7 insultin and punishing me? It’s...kinda like being out of some sort of duty that I had ta be with ‘em, otherwise I’d be nothing.” Mammon gives you both a small smile, “But. I get ta be myself here, without them bringin me down. Ya know?”

“It’s a feeling of being set free from them?” Angel concludes as the last call for the train sounds off and that must have been a sign. “And speaking of being set free, I shall do the same and set you both free of me.” They turn to depart onto their trip home before you called after them.

“I wish we had more time together though Angel! We can make up for lost time?” You offer hopefully as they turned back to face you. They give you both a reassuring smile, and for some reason, you felt like everything was going to be okay.

“Goodbye MC, Mammon. Until we meet again.” Angel says their farewell as they depart onto the last train of the night. You and Mammon wave a send off to them as Brimmond meows loudly to you both before the door closes behind them, leaving you and Mammon are left alone.

“So what happens now?” Mammon questions you as you shake your head and give him a soft smile, “Now? Now it’s just you and me Mammon. Mom’s still letting us pick our home, all we gotta do is pick the one we’ll call home.”

“Home...” Mammon gives you a bittersweet smile as he wrapped his arm around your waist as you both headed back to the apartment, “For once I can’t wait to go home. Ain’t that sad MC?” He chuckles halfheartedly as you leaned against him.

“It doesn’t have to be sad thing Mammon. You won’t be alone because I’ll be with you til the very end.”

• - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

The House of Lamentation has never been so still and as silent as it has now as in sorrow, the brothers had returned home without their brother and you. The house that once held life, was silent and cold, except for the unending and repeated tone of the grandfather clock.

But who could blame the both of you? Not after the way they had treated you, and the centuries of Mammon enduring their insults and physical punishments. A simple apology couldn’t, and wouldn’t change a thing. They knew things weren’t going to be the same as it was.

Your room, along with Mammon’s are left as they had been when you and Mammon had decided together that you’d leave the Devildom forever. Despite the fact that Mammon’s room was quite a mess, none of the brothers felt the room being tidy was Mammon at all. They now stand as a shrine to both of your memories. And most days, your rooms would have a brother or two occupying your beds, wishing you both could come back.

All of the remaining brothers, especially Lucifer and Satan dutifully clean the dust off in your rooms. They decide not to throw anything out, from the collection of losing lottery tickets scattered the floor in Mammon’s room to your notebooks filled with all your RAD classes. Nothing was going to leave your rooms, they were trying to hold onto any and every piece of you.

The reality of Mammon’s presence hit the brothers when their finances were shaky at best. The brothers were firm that they wanted nothing to do with Archemond, Avatar of Greed or not. The budget was going to be tight if the brothers weren’t out getting jobs to sustain their lifestyles. They would have to work for their money, whether they liked it or not.

Lucifer couldn’t afford the expensive demonus and getting his suit pressed to prim and proper condition, and it seemed Diavolo had reduced his pay. Fitting punishment since he was the cause that you and Mammon had left. Leviathan wasn’t able to buy all the latest in anime and gaming goods, his admiral stipend could only pay so much. His heart broke many times over the things he couldn’t buy, not as much as not having you and Mammon here with him.

Satan could not buy his exclusive human world novels and food for the stray cats. And finding a suitable job with his temperament was difficult, unless he could be alone or with those he deemed suitable. Asmodeus was in a pickle when it came to finances, no more expensive clothes and beauty supplies, though he had donations for his superfans. Though it felt hollow as he felt guilty that he seemed to be the only one who wasn’t affected, and it ended up going to the family’s budget.

Beelezebub could not eat as much as he wanted to, though as of late, his appetite had declined dramatically. Any heavy lifting job at the Akuzon warehouses, he’d take. Someone had to continue to protect the family, even if it meant that his hunger would bother him immensely. Belphegor couldn’t exactly skim through responsibilities, nor could he make his brothers do work for him. While he complained about having to do labor, the appeal of working from home didn’t sound too bad. If he did end up working.

The brothers all dealt with your’s and Mammon’s absence in their own way, they are firm in waiting for you and Mammon to eventually forgiven them.

• - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

As of late, Lucifer holes himself in his study, aside from answering the Prince about his duties. He only came out to mealtimes and he could check on them every night, in an attempt to keep his brothers from falling apart. Only he had fallen apart the moment you both swore you’d never forgive him.

But he had to find reason to keep going, if there was one. Cursed records and bottles of demonus is the current world he lives in. In the evenings after dinner, Lucifer spends the most of his time blaring out his records, and pouring himself another glass and wallow in his sorrow.

Father’s favorite son is lost, he had lost his favorite and most cherished brother. The one he could depend on no matter what, yet he had failed him. Mammon was the one who held the family together after their fall, and now the family was dangling by a thin thread. It was only Mammon who had that effect on his brothers, to keep them feeling alright at the expense of his own pain. And now anything could break their threads of sanity.

And you, his most treasured human. It was you he was the most grateful to, you had repaired his family and brought them back together again. A feat even the mighty and proud Lucifer couldn’t triumph with all the strength he possessed. You were the only one for him that was worth throwing his pride aside. You had done so much for his family, and this is how he had repaid you.

None of this would had happened if he just said ‘no’ to Lord Diavolo’s proposal of hosting another exchange program. The stack of reports you had sent to Diavolo as a part of the program sits at his desk, and Lucifer couldn’t find the heart to read what you had wrote. You must had been suffering immensely, and he had chose ignorance in favor of excellence of another.

Angel would have been the perfect candidate at the beginning of the program, as a goody two shoes. It would have been an unremarkable, and the facade of keeping Belphie locked up from his brothers would have still continued. But if the that were the case, you wouldn’t have come along and repaired the broken bonds between him and his brothers.

Of course Mammon had chosen to stay by your side when he and the other brothers had drifted away. He had trusted him to look after you, and much to his surprise, Mammon had chosen a human over his family. Of course he did, you had showed him unconditional love and kindness, a far cry from what his own flesh and blood had treated him.

He shouldn’t have been too hard on either of you, he shouldn’t have let his pride blind him. Would Lilith be proud of him? She wouldn’t have forgiven him from beyond the grave for treating her descendant like this. He had let Mammon down and he had let you down. And now you both were gone forever.

He could only reflect on what he had done, he had lost three of his loved ones. Father must have been enjoying how his favorite son was suffering for how far he had dragged down his brothers due to his actions.

• - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

If Leviathan was the shut in of the family, the dial is turned up to eleven after you and Mammon weren’t here. He hardly left his room, only that Lucifer was the only who could drag him out of his room, just to make sure he was eating.

His life was a constant pity party, even moreso now that his big brother and his only friend(aside from Henry 2.0), were no longer a part of his life. Leviathan spent his days wallowing in his bedtub, in his own thoughts that had come true. He no longer had focus on his usual routines of games and anime. Even his online friends couldn’t get him out out of his sorrow.

Nothing he loved could bring him any comfort, not even the Ruri-chan limited events and special promos could bring him any joy. Clutching his special Ruri-chan pillow close to him, he could only wish it was you instead. How he found you asleep next to him on those late night anime episode marathons, sure it was awkward for him but he ended up cherishing you just being next to him.

He was always the first to insult Mammon before anyone could, of course it was his fault. How could he not know his words hurt his brother? Stuff like this happened so many times in the slice of life animes that you and himself watched. How could he not realize stuff like this could even hurt his older brother?

You were his most cherished friend, his first one in all these centuries. You felt real, none of his online friends could compare to you. Like in those animes you both watched together, he felt the blossoming of true friendship between you. And yet he had so easily tossed you aside for someone who he deemed .

Sure, Angel had impressed Leviathan with TSL knowledge compared to your knowledge and your attention span to the subject. But they were not you, if it weren’t for you, he wouldn’t even have been able to go on about it with them. After that, Leviathan had pushed you aside as if they were a much better you.

The Lord of Shadow had abandoned his one true Henry for another. Who saw the real him, listened to his rants, and supported him in all his interests despite causing secondhand embarrassment to the other brothers. Leviathan would never meet a true Henry like yourself, someone as special like didn’t pop up as such every century.

The Lord of Shadow had also lost his Lord of Fools, who was his guardian from way back in the Celestial Realm. His memories of Mammon being his guardian and mentor back then seemed like a distant memory. Mammon always did want Leviathan to loosen up and have fun. Not to mention Mammon was the reason he had gotten everything he wanted, at the expense of the emotional and physical well being of his brother.

Leviathan sunk further into his bedtub as the blanket came over him, if he had possessed the spine of Lotan, he would still have you and Mammon back with him. Perhaps you both were better off without such a worthless and yucky otaku, maybe he didn’t deserve everything good you both had given him.

• - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

Being wrath incarnate, a part of the house would be broken one way or another. Which didn’t help Lucifer’s finances, but deep down Satan knew no matter how much he destroyed, you and Mammon weren’t coming back to the Devildom.

If you deemed his room to be a mess, then it was a warzone. The sounds of howls of agony and objects being tossed, and shelves breaking had ruined his orderly collections. Wrath came and went in waves as the brothers knew they would hear another outrage in a few days.

In the aftermath, Satan collapsed to the floor his deep pants were what was left. His horns, tail, and claws receded as he collapsed in the rubble, and at his feet laid a torn book. The pages were worn as Satan immediately recognized which one it was, the forbidden book that started the body switch with him and Lucifer. And thus began his journey in knowing and understanding you.

A warm tear drops onto the page as he shakily touches it. How could he have forgotten about you so easily? It was almost like a storybook tale, the main character who saved the family. It was you who had improved his relationship with Lucifer in such a short amount of time and brought the family together once again. What started as a ploy to use you to annoy Lucifer, you became much more than that, you became a valued confidant and a beloved member of the family.

While it was true that Angel’s knowledge of topics outclassed your’s, and thus he and them could converse for hours compared to having to explain everything to you. In addition, the fact that they had a talking cat familiar shouldn’t had easily swayed his favorability over you. How he tossed you aside in favor of a person that he deemed more worthy than you was a decision that he’d regret.

And Mammon, his dear brother who raised him after their fall, despite his circumstances. Despite the fact that he constantly hurt Mammon when Lucifer couldn’t face his own creation. How could he just act like he had never done his brother wrong? He was just as guilty as the others, always pointing out his flaws, as if he didn’t have any. His was just as bad as the others.

Mammon truly was the most decent of brothers wasn’t he? He couldn’t recall if Mammon had laid a hand against you, but he did vividly remember the day you rejected making the pact with him. Even now he remembers how Mammon solely stood up against Lucifer and protected you, when they were all supposed to.

Satan finds an old children’s book, a picture of a cat graced its cover. The tears hadn’t stopped as he remembered how Mammon would read this book to him when Lucifer refused. Nights when the witches were the absolute worst to him, he still soldiered on and spent time with him to assured that he was still a part of the family. When did it all go to shit? When did he stop being a grateful little brother to the one who helped raised him?

Mammon was the epitome of a big brother and you were an angel, you both had played a major role in his life. Sure he had plenty of people he had connections with, but none of them could ever make him connect so much as you and Mammon. He had let the both of you slip through his fingers, if only he had the wisdom to prevent all of this from happening, he’d go back in time and reverse it all.

• - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

Asmodeus tries to fill the void as he always had when he felt like he was missing something. Hosting his Asmo parties and coming home with strangers for a good time was his go to solution to fill the void you both left in him. But nothing would ever make him feel as whole as you and Mammon had did, unconditional love was something his fans could not provide him.

Of course when the party highs had quickly diminished, Asmodeus had to face the lows. Lows where he holed himself in his room, sobbing loudly during the night as he had thrown his self care out the window. Between the noisy hiccups and him sniffling in to keep his snot from coming out, wails of your name and Mammon’s filled his room.

Between the revolving door of strangers occupying his bed and days where Asmodeus was a mess in his bed, he had deeply cried out for you and Mammon to return to him. His pillows were soaked with tears and makeup of days past, his breath trembled as he reached for the last tissue in the box and wiped his tears.

Even with him constantly trying to get Solomon to give all the deets on what you and Mammon were doing in the human world, he was denied each time. Even stalking all your socials, along with Mammon’s, even if he tried to figure out what his human world handles were. Not even any of his hanger-ons could figure that out.

You had seen his most ugly side of him, yet you brought out the best of him, he had accepted that your were on the same level as he. It had been the first time since falling did he truly crave to be validated by the one and only human he deemed worthy of his love. You had fixed his family, a feat even the greatest sorcerer he’d known for ages couldn’t accomplish. You had taught him that true beauty was more than superficial, it was about having a beautiful heart and mind, but more importantly, a beautiful soul. Something he seemed to have and currently lacked when it came to you.

And for Mammon? Why would he have wanted to come back with the family? He was always insulting him for just about anything, the family’s own punching bag. Even he couldn’t recall how it all started, Mammon did always have a certain confidence about him, perhaps that’s why. He always had to cover up his insecurities with his makeup and his honeyed words. He had forgotten about his brother who had looked after him, and gave him those coveted modeling gigs? He, along with Levi were always the one who insulted Mammon first. Of course Mammon wouldn’t want to stay with them if that was all he got from them.

There was nothing he could do now, without Mammon around, he couldn’t go on shopping sprees or host his wild parties. He had to resort to the oldest job since the dawn of time, for once he had to think of his family rather than indulge in himself. But was it really worth it if you both weren’t here with him?

Perhaps you were both fed up with him, why, with him talking about himself nonstop. As if it was his world and everyone was just living in it, only as pawns for him to play with. He was so full of himself, why would he wanted anyone lesser? Coming back from an physically and emotionally draining night, Asmo didn’t bother with his own self care. Instead to cry once more into the sheets and wail for the ones he had loved and lost.

• - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

Beelzebub prides himself as the family’s protector, yet he couldn’t protect you nor his older brother from themselves. Now he had lost two more of his family, what good was being the protector if he so easily let you and Mammon slip through his grasps once more?

Though you’d think he’d be devastated by the family having a dramatic drop in how much he could consume, nothing could compare to the loss of you and Mammon. Beelzebub had started eating less, it wasn’t like the food tasted any better. Why would it if you and Mammon weren’t here with him? Beelzebub didn’t find much joy in eating since you both left and some days he found himself starving himself.

It was only through his twin that begged him to eat enough to sate the pain, was this the same pain you had gone through when he had pushed you aside? Had he been so blissfully ignorant of your suffering that he didn’t even notice how little you had eaten in the past few months? Beelzebub gently holds a cookbook you compiled for him, recipes that you both had cooked together. When was the last time you both cooked together?

Angel was polite and friendly towards you and the rest of the family, how could he just accept them as another friend? Did it just take one spell to keep him from eating everything in sight that he’d easily forget you and everything you’ve done to save his family?

Sure, you saw him as a bottomless pit at first, but you saw him as a gentle giant who cared deeply of his family. How could he had forgot that you protected himself and Luke from Lucifer’s wrath? He had so easily forgotten that you had shared your life candle with him as well, now your life was cut shorter because of him. He had failed you once again, how many times did he have to fail you to get it through his thick skull?

And his dear brother Mammon, who had looked after the twins after their fall. Mammon had done so much in keeping the family together after their tragedy, and this is how they had repaid him. Even back in the Celestial Realm, Mammon had been too lenient on the twins and Lilith, and it was no different in the Devildom with the twins. Mammon really did let them get away with things as he had did back then.

Beelzebub had blindly followed Lucifer in never calling him out for Mammon’s punishments, nor did he do anything to aid his brother. He had also failed to protect you from Lucifer once more. He didn’t call out the rest of his siblings either, perhaps he was as dumb as he looked. His stomach growls once more, though he can’t bring himself sate his hunger.

He had blamed himself for Lilith’s death, now he had to add failing you and Mammon to the list. All Beelzebub could do now is protect the brothers that remained, he wasn’t going to lose another family member. Who would hold his hand when the nightmares of losing you and Mammon started creeping into his dreams now? • - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

Belphie sleeps more than usual, and doesn’t want to do anything else. Sleep was a pitiful form of refuge, sometimes it’d be nice to forget about things for a little while. Except when he woke up, reality would just come back to hit him. Why hadn’t he tried to be more than what his sin confined him to?

The awful reality that he was the cause of your demise again, along with him losing another sibling because of him, was not what he wanted to relive again. He couldn’t just coast through life so easily now that the brothers had to work to upkeep the House of Lamentation. It now dawned on him that life was never going to be the same.

Belphegor would either spend most of the time in either your room or Mammon’s, mumbling in his sleep, he was begging you two to come back. He spent lonely nights in the planetarium, staring and your stars, along with his and Beel’s. As much as he’d like to think that his sin was the cause of you both leaving, he was aware that he had done nothing.

How could he had just forget everything that you’ve done for his family? Oh wait, they did forget about him killing you, you probably didn’t forget and you easily wanted to leave due to that. He knew Mammon didn’t forget seeing his baby brother kill his beloved human, and it was easy that Mammon had chosen to stay by your side rather than the family.

You may had tried to make amends with Belphie, even if it was a painful ordeal. You still had nightmares and at times of uncertainty, you feared that he might lash out from you denying him anything he asked. Mammon had been extra clingy with you and tried to keep Belphegor at arm’s length, but he always took this as jealousy. Why couldn’t he see that sooner?

Reflecting on your words about being Lilith’s descendant, he knew deep down that wasn’t the only reason why he loved you. You were you. Not Lilith. Not a replacement for the sister he lost. Yet he so quickly replaced you when Angel had come into their home. It was easy for Belphie and Angel to get along, they were enamored with constellations and there was no bad history between them. Why couldn’t he just spend time with you both? Now who was going to watch the stars with him? Who would be there to wake him in the morning after?

He had done nothing for his beloved big brother, even taking part in antagonizing him as much as he would with Lucifer. When was the last time he had done something nice for him? After all these years of Mammon raising his little brothers before and after the fall, Belphie was nothing but an ungrateful brat. He could have shown him a shred of kindness after all Mammon had done for the family, but it was far more easier to insult and ridicule him, knowing that Mammon wouldn’t actually fight back.

You were both gone, Belphie knew why. He, along with his brothers had taken advantage of the love and kindness that you and Mammon had towards the family and you had both had enough. Belphegor slept in the attic, feeling as useless as he had when he had lost Lilith. The only way he could see you both back is in his dreams, never wanting to wake up to cruel reality he caused.

• - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

With the departure of the recent human exchange student, Lord Diavolo had closed the exchange program indefinitely. Simeon and Luke had returned to the Celestial Realm, and Solomon had gone back to the human world. While they were able to keep a constant communication with you, the same could not be said for the brothers.

There is an obvious shift in behavior from the six brothers that the lower and noble demons noticed. They knew better than to instigate trouble with the brothers, now resorting to walking on eggshells around the coldness of the avatars.

The whole Devildom had noticed the strained relationship between the Avatars and Lord Diavolo. If Lucifer and Diavolo had been attached at the hip, it wasn’t so much anymore. Ristorante Six had never seen the pair dine together. And during formal balls, all the Avatars were there physically, but mentally, they had checked out the moment you and Mammon flat out rejected them.

Hell had really frozen over the Devildom since your’s and Mammon’s departure.

The six lords would wait for you both, until the day you both would forgive them. But would you? That would be up to you two.

• - - - - - - ☆- - - - - - •

~One year later~

Things had gone smoothly since that night of cutting off the Avatars from both of your lives, albeit there were a couple of bumps along the way. You had considered removing your pacts as you had no use of them now. If that were the case, Mammon was supportive with your decision.

Mammon had become quite a successful model, working with various fashion brands and sponsors. You had kept a collection on various magazines with him on the cover, just you had done in the Devildom. Adding a bit more boost to his ego. And without his need for greed, along with the reality of how finances in the human world worked, he was quick to pick up on saving and when to spend.

Though he kept forgetting that he was a human, so you had to keep reminding him. The reactions and looks of the other models also did the job. He still called you his human when it was just you two, it still gave him butterflies when you always responded to his little pet name for you.

Of course, he was forever grateful for the love and kindness you unconditionally showered upon him.

The Royals and the Purgatory Trio were constantly in contact with you and Mammon and would visit often. Whenever they could, they’d visit you whenever you and Mammon needed anything. You and Mammon did get occasional gifts and food from both the Devildom and Celestial Realm. And Solomon and yourself did keep up in your training in magic, and as well as Solomon helped Mammon with spells as well.

You had also kept in constant contact with Angel, just to make sure they didn’t bury themselves in guilt after the fallout from the brothers. Video chats between you both were often as you’d both update each other on what was going on in your lives. The times that they did manage to visit you, lost time was made up between them, yourself, and Mammon.

“We’re here!” You exclaimed as you excitedly got out of the passenger side of Mammon’s car, the driver quickly parking the car out in the driveway. “Oi! MC! ‘Ang on!” Mammon called after you as you went up to the house you both had chosen together.

Your mom’s country house stood before you as you smiled fondly at the childhood memories that were still instilled in your now new home. Now you were ready to make new ones with Mammon. “We’re home!” You cry out as Mammon huffs as he brought out some of your belongings. ”

“You know Mams, we could have picked Mom’s cabin out in the woods.” You remind him as you rubbed your chin, “Though that doesn’t sound like a bad getaway if we want to have a change of pace.” The sound of luggage immediately dropping told you all you needed to know about your partner.

“Oh hell no!” Mammon cries out as he quickly ran to you as if you really intended to drag him to the cabin, “Don’t ya know what happens in the couple who goes to the cabin in the woods? Like in tha movies?! Ain’t no way I’m going there! Not no way, not no how!” Mammon finishes with a firm pout, his frown giving him a childish charm.

You gently cup his face as you chuckle softly, “I know. I know. We’ve seen the movies about that many times Mams.” You assure him and pressed your lips to his forehead. “I know you wouldn’t like that. But you did consider Mom’s beach house too you know.”

“Oh yeah! We could have gotten that one!” Mammon whined as a thought suddenly struck him, “Oh hey! We could sell ‘em as DNDs!” he exclaimed as you laughed.

“B&Bs Mams, though I think I’ll talk to mom about it.” You corrected as you looked thoughtful, “Although, it might not be a bad venture for extra income.” You agreed as Mammon beams in delight. For once he didn’t have to hear opposition to his opinions. “It’s a good idea actually.” You state as you give him a kiss on the cheek for it.

You smiled as you noticed his tanned cheeks furiously flush red at your affection, “Oi..Who said you can do that Treasure?” Mammon mumbled as you giggled softly and leaned against his forehead.

A comfortable silence settled between you both as you lovingly gazed into his eyes. Entwining his hands with your’s, Mammon let you take him towards the house you two would share together for the rest of your lives. It was a new beginning for both of you, and you couldn’t wait for what the future would bring for you together.

“Welcome home Mammon. We’re home, just you and me.”

A/N: And there you have it! Thank you all very much for all the support for my first ever series on tumblr! Maybe I will write some bonus stories that will be stories I couldn’t fit in here. Cheers all!

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ask-sebastian · 5 months

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Just a little bit of appreciation for the person behind the blog! :)

We love and cherish you, and we are unbelievably thankful for all the things you do for us!

Your writing is amazing, and so are you! Thank you for being here for us since the beginning.

🫂

[You are very kind to take the time to say so. I must UNO reverse you, though. I dearly hope that everybody I interact with (silent lurkers included) know how much I enjoy this incredibly fun, kind, positive, and supportive corner of the fandom. Thank you for sticking around and supporting the content that I produce and share.

I know that my presence has been somewhat sporadic lately. Life is a balancing act, but I am still here and still very much enjoy answering your owls, albeit at the slowest of snail's paces.

Above all, I want to be certain that I answer everyone with quality writing that is true to my Sebastian. Giving everything proper thought and consideration is something that is deeply important to me, but sometimes that makes for a long writing process. I know that I sound like a broken record at this point, but thank you all for your patience. 🖤]

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endious · 1 year

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UMM I NEED TO SEE HOW YOU PORTRAY LIU PLS AND THANK YOU

imma be real with you im in love with the idea of what liu COULD be but have never cared to actually look into his story or whatever SO ? we are going based off vibes my twisted mind has created. whether it makes sense or not or isnt “liu” or whatever I DONT CARE ! i havent put any dedication or thought into any character besides jeff LMFAO so i am struggling to grasp my idea of liu’s character. i’ll def work on it though in the future methinks

liu has aggressive moments with you. he doesnt exactly mean to be so rough but its so damn difficult when you refuse to talk to him or when you stare for too long at the stitches and scars on his face. stop staring at him like that. stop it. stop.

it’s a red blur for him when he becomes someone he “isnt”. your cries, begs for forgiveness and apologies falling from your lips breaks his heart after he’s calmed down and all that’s left is broken objects, his knuckles bare and bloody and your body trembling on the floor and shaking with sobs as you tell him you’re sorry over and over like a broken record. it hurts liu to see you like that, it wasnt him that did it.. it couldn’t be him. liu wasnt like that. that had to be someone else— sully is who he called his bursts of anger. maybe he really did become a totally different person when provoked like his brother would claim way back in the past. maybe he really did morph into a monster from time to time but it was not liu and dont you ever try to say it was. just nod your head and agree to whatever he says because its best that way. things always go smoothly when you obey and comply and he’s happy when you do so why dont you just stay that way.

liu tries to hold you often at night and gets irritated when you tense up or try to pull away from his eerily warm touch. “it’s just me. why are you so scared?..” it takes a lot to run his patience out too. he wants to give you multiple chances to fix your mistakes and he wont immediately bash your head into the closest object like jeff would. liu likes to claim he is very caring, just like mom always was towards him. he’s trapped in his own sick fantasy of living a happy life with you to the point where he will ramble to you about all of his thoughts and ideas and plans for you to the point where it makes your skin crawl over some of the things he’s said. one time he mentioned wanting to cut a piece of your hair off so he could smell it and be reminded of you when he’s not with you. another time he said he wanted to slice off some of your skin and keep it forever so it’s like you’re always with him when he has to leave. and another time he whispered how badly he wanted to cut your stomach open, pull your guts out and crawl inside of you. it’s insane the terrible things he’s said and thought were surely “romantic” but only left you sleepless and fearful for your life.

liu plays this pretend dream on loop and it’s best if you go along with it. accept his “love”, accept his thoughtful “gifts”, accept and thank him for keeping you “protected” from the bad men that want to take you from him. you’ll start spiraling too along with him. as much as you fight it and try to stay determined on keeping your sanity, it’s difficult when a man that pretends to be sane and shows you twisted acts of affection starts to make your mind slip a little deeper into that darkness with each passing day chained up in a bedroom of a unfamiliar home. and how giddy he feels when you start to give in to his touches and words. but if you tried to get away? if you managed to escape his tight grip on your life? you’re a dead fucking girl because liu will cry and scream in agony for days before anger boils over in his veins and it wont be liu who finds you, oh no it will be sully who begins his mission of retrieving the lost little lamb who led herself astray in the dangerous dense woods.

#— cadie answers #— nonnies #is this good ? fuck no LMFAO im actually so sorry for any liu whores </3 #i never read his “backstory” or whatever and i dont even read liu fics to get a grasp of him SO IM SORRY #this is so bad i will work on his character in the back of my mind sometimes LFMAO i hope this is fine someone please tell me if this is ba #or if its actually fine i need a liu fucker to let me know LMFAODOQODOOWDI

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vampsquerade · 1 year

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it’s late as hell in the night rn but i think i’m fine enough to come back for a bit. i’ve been put on antidepressants and mood stabilizers so for the moment i am stable and managed to take my time in writing in between my classes (W online courses they’re so easy and i finish everything in a day) so expect a lot of posts come tomorrow. and i mean a lot. thank you all for your patience, i sound like a broken record at this point but you guys caring about my mental health has kept me holding on to hope the entire time i was gone. it reminds me constantly that there are people who care, whether i’ve met them or not. sorry for also being shit at replying if you’ve dm’d me; i just sleep so much nowadays because my meds make me super sleepy and once i’m finished with work/homework i just fucking pass out. i think the most i’ve ever written when it came to working on the requests i’ve had saved i only worked on them for about two and a half hours a day…i used to write happily for five hours a day.

with this being said, requests will also be opening back up tomorrow and i think i’ll keep them open for about 4 days. so from saturday-tuesday i’ll have requests opened. i will change my rules a bit and will now add angst with a bad ending alongside angst with a good ending. please do keep your eyes open within the next coming days for multiple announcements i make. thank you all for your support and all the new followers i’ve gained in my absence—i hope all of you are doing well and if you’re not: please remember to take care of yourself and give yourself the love others give to you. it helps, i promise.

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ginnsbaker · 11 months

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Ahh, I’m late to these last 2 chapters because I was so busy I barely had time to do anything besides my responsibilities (being an adult sucks sometimes haha) but oh my god, once again, I feel like a broken record mentioning how amazing your writing is!! I’ll be writing for chapter 9 because if not this’ll get insanely long! Haha first of all, Shannon irks me but she also seems like a woman that has been through a lot with Pietro so she doesn’t have time or patience for bullshit which makes me like understand her, but her motives in “helping” Wanda feel so fake and like she has something up her sleeves I can’t trust her!! Also I loved Pietro and Wanda’s talk, the part where she starts acknowledging that cheating ruins everything in its wake. Like I know she knew how much it affected her personally, but I also feel she’s more aware of how it goes so much more beyond that, like it goes beyond her and reader! So that felt like good progress, makes me really root for her healing and happiness! I root for her and reader together, but am also conflicted because like I’ve said the way you write this has me questioning beyond just like a cliche happy ending, does that make sense? Haha second, (I’m all over the place, so sorry if it comes off that way) reader withholding information from Nat, woo, it just makes me so uneasy, like I know as humans sometimes we want to put our best selves forward to the most important people in our lives, but if there’s anything life has taught me is, the truth always comes out whether we want it to or not and Nat has just been such a constant, steady fixture in reader’s life that this little information has the potential to bite reader in the ass and I’m so scared?!?! Because I would hate for them to lose each other! Cause honestly I feel like a friendship breakup hurts so much more??? Third, Yelena, my dear dear Yelena, god, you can tell she’s so in love with reader that I really hope she doesn’t get hurt, and again, I know that’s impossible because that’s just the way things can be but, I really wish she can be saved from pain! Me being an optimistic empath, I just wanna hug and save everyone from pain haha but I hope reader doesn’t hurt her and if she does hurt her I hope it’s not the way she was hurt that would be so shitty, but again it could happen (my god, I’m gonna go crazy!!) Fourth, Sparky?!? Not Sparky!! Animal pain is another level so that got me emotional!! Fifth, Vision. My god, can he just fuck off?! (I wish, but he also adds that little spark of ahdjjfjdkskgks to it haha) Sixth, Wanda’s relapse, poor baby, I understand her though, experiencing something so emotionally charged with Sparky, seeing Yelena at reader’s place, coming to the realization that being at reader’s place wasn’t a good idea. Just generally being all over the place, I can see why she relapsed. Still rooting for her healing though!! I cannot wait to see what comes next!! I hope you have an amazing week! Stay safe and take care! -💫🥀

P.S that’s awesome that you’re going to do a race! I wish I could, but I recently injured myself so my main focus is recovering fully! I feel like I’m 80% there though so that makes me happy! Haha just need to keep working for 100% recovery! Also this fic has been such an amazing read, so thank you for blessing me with your artistry!! Truly, I will never tire of saying how amazing your writing is!! Again, I apologize if all of the above seems jumbled and a mess in general as I am slightly all over the place haha but I cannot miss out the opportunity to speak about this story!!

It's not a jumbled mess, I love everything about it, I feel like I'm talking to you in RL and I just get so excited about discussions like this because 1) i have no beta, no one to discuss the plot with at all except when you guys get to read it and comment 2) i get different perspectives and realizations and i see different reactions that are all valid since we all come from different experiences.

First of all, thank you for staying with the story and for always sharing your thoughts.

I think breaking up with a friend can hurt more than romantic relationships. When we enter a romantic relationship, we are aware that there's always the possibility of losing them, but friendships.. we always expect them to last for life. Shannon is a little shit who's defense mechanism is being mean to everyone lol. But she does care about Wanda who is basically her sister-in-law now.

There's going to be healing for everybody. Don't worry :)

Can't wait to hear what you think about the next chapters :D

Again, thank youuuu <3

P.S. What's your injury? I hope you recover 100% soon!

#ilgoss asks #💫🥀 anon

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aquiescentraconteur · 1 year

Text

“When you’re thinking too much, write. When you aren’t thinking enough, read.”

This has been the greatest advice I’ve gotten. It drove me to create my ‘venting grounds’, they lay here.

My ‘learning curve’ lies in every book, poem, and random text I’ve read.

From Austen, Hardy, Tolstói, Bronté, Dickens, Shakespeare, and Fitzgerald to Murakami, Gluck, Kirkland, Wallace, Whitman, and Blake they were, and still are, my teachers throughout life. The one’s I choose to learn from and the ones who chose to teach me.

Each and every single one of them, in their own particular way. These people, even though they will never know it, helped me navigate my pathway by strengthening my soul and feeding my mind with wondering questions and out of this world speculation on the honorable and ethical way to leave your mark around here.

Austen, my older sister, has taught me that you have to be your own woman before you are anyone else’s. Growing up she has symbolized many different things: the empowerment of generations ahead, the passion between forbidden lovers, the individual frustration recorded at a glance of difficulties, and the necessary patience to overcome it.

She has accomplished all of this in one, simple, mind-blowing, book. My favorite.

I’ve read every work published by her, and I’ve consumed every idea she tried to imprint on the world. From Pride and Prejudice to Persuasion, from the reluctance in Elizabeth to change herself to Wentworth’s predisposition to do it. She was the first classical author I was ever consumed by. The liability she places in the characters together with the mirroring between tales and the incandescent lessons under each written line made me fall in love with her writing.

Murakami, my latest crush, taught me that: “Understanding is but the sum of misunderstandings.”. Isn’t it marvelous? Isn’t it something so clear and easy to understand but simultaneously such an intricate complex thought? My tears were falling down at every other page due to the good-humored and soul-hunting reflections he used during the book.

The self-induced reclusion I experience with certain works is something I’ll forever hold dear, because the biggest lessons and the most important considerations, arrived from them. These experienced minds and veteran souls were my teachers on growth, intellect, and compassion.

“So when people say we’re alone in the ether? Alone in everything. In time and space, in existence, in religion.”, Blake said to me.

He defeats life’s determinism with every word he chose to describe and portray Charlotte and Rinaldo. Those two saw through each other to see the other. Their story talks a lot about circles, perfect circles. Blake describes falling in love even when you’re broken as: “ the fleeting breath of a foregone moment, the intimacy of things undone, the summer season that passes.”. Perhaps the same principle applies to broken people, perhaps broken people can be a fleeting breath in a forgone moment, a summer season that passed. Perhaps they will return next year, warmer, for someone else.

Thank you all.

To those who have already arrived and to those who are still to arrive.

I am certain you will change my life.

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parkerlyn · 3 years

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Hi all!

I'll save the gushing for below the cut, but ahhh one year of this game!! Thank you a million times over for your support 💚💛💙💜 I'd love to hear from y'all if you have any questions about The Nameless, or things you like about the game or characters or any thoughts or memes you'd like to share 👀

I'm still working on the game POV specials unfortunately aksjdsk but in regards to other words...we did it! (JUST BARELY)

30k complete over the past month! Granted, I did count some drabbles as part of this too, but it was still about 25k words into Chapter 4! And I am very very excited to continue more of the main story soon.

And to continue celebrating, a new little surprise...

A bonus content hub! Since tumblr tends to be a Webbed Site when it comes to search, I've started to compile the longer drabbles that have been published here into a Twine portal. This allows you to set your MC name, pronouns, and sheevra type, as well as the RO pronouns when reading!

Still working on sorting through my archive and adding potential drabbles and small edits, but wanted to push this live as a little thank you. 🥰 This will continue to be updated as new drabbles are written.

Check it out here!

(pspsps it's also @attollogame's anniversary go send them some love if you haven't already. And if you have send more 👀We...may or may not be working on a collab sysba/oisein piece thanks to those touch prompts and an excellent anon ajdfkaslj)

Thank you so much again and hope you enjoy!!

xoxo Parker

Okay a tiny bit more gushing-

I'm a broken record of being cheesy and over the top and I know I get quiet or just kind of disappear in and out interactivity wise. But all the authors and readers of the IF community have been absolutely wonderful to share this world and story and characters with, and it's become such an integral part of my life. So thank you for continuing to stick with me (and for your patience as I know I'm particularly slow).

Every comment and message and anything is so wonderful, especially when I have those dips and doubts around this story and my writing. I'll never be able to express how much I appreciate that, and I'm so thankful to have y'all along!

So thank you thank you thank you times a billion. And here's to continuing this adventure! ❤️❤️❤️

#the nameless #tnif #interactive fiction #interactive novel #twine #twine game #itch.io #bonus content #romance #fantasy

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comfyswitcherblanketfort · 3 years

Text

Grunge-Metal Geralt 3

its finally time 😂 after months of staring at an empty google doc i finally had a useful idea - also y’all, go listen to ‘Brighter Side of Grey’ by Five Finger Death Punch bc that’s the song i based this on and its fire and i love it also all of ffdp is one whole witchery mood

Warnging: vague discussion of a car crash where Geralt was severely injured, big emotionaly vulnerability, swearing?, listen to the song then you’ll get the vibes i promise

__________________

“Give them a break, guys,” Eskel sighed as he wrote down his coffee order, “They had a close call. It’s not like they’re always this…”

“Gross. Skel. The word you’re looking for is gross.” Lambert snatched the paper out of his brother’s hand and stalked out of the room with Aiden in tow.

Jaskier scrunched his nose and called from where he was tucked under Geralt’s chin, “Did we drive them away? I can get up if it’s too much.” Even as he spoke, neither he nor Geralt so much as twitched to make good on the offer.

“Doesn’t bother me,” Eskel shrugged.

Lambert and Aiden, mainly Lambert, were getting fed up with Geralt and Jaskier cuddling and cooing and doing general new couple bullshit. Especially since they’d been together three years now. They were recording a collaboration song, meaning everyone had to be there, but it seemed the two vocalists only really cared about each other. Jaskier sat on Geralt’s lap, played with his hair, stole kisses whenever he could… at one point Lambert caught Geralt tracing Jaskier’s lips and forced a coughing fit to get his attention. He probably thought it was subtle, even if no one else did. So to take a break and get some of what he called ‘patience juice’ (coffee), Lambert ran to their favorite coffee shop while Eskel laid down his bass line.

It’s not that they were intentionally this annoying, not all the time at least. After the car crash, especially once Geralt started doing well in his physical therapy, the couple just couldn’t keep their hands off each other. Not to say that was the only relationship Geralt was suddenly extra involved in, it was just the most noticeable.

Finally, after tea and coffee was distributed to everyone it was time for Geralt and Jaskier to, well, do their jobs. Jaskier was fidgeting and humming little scales, doing anything to calm the sudden nerves he felt bubbling up in his stomach.

“You alright?” Geralt purred, nudging him with his elbow as they stood side by side at their respective microphones. When Jaskier only shrugged he continued, “What's wrong?”

“I’m just not used to so many people being here while I…” Jaskier motioned to the mic before glancing around him and taking a deep breath, “it’s a vulnerable song…”

Geralt’s worry lines in his forehead melted as he pulled Jaskier into his arms, “I can kick them out if you want?” he whispered.

Shaking his head and inhaling Geralt’s scent deeply, something Jaskier had learned not to take for granted, he steeled his nerves, “I’ll be fine. Maybe a little weepy, but fine.”

As they were about to start, listening to the instrumental track and humming their parts of the song, Lambert brought Jaskier a bottle of water and set it on his music stand. He gave him a quick side hug and kissed his hair, offering a small “sorry” for all his teasing. Jaskier just giggled in response, the kind that only bubbles over from too much anticipation. He missed it, but Geralt mouthed a small ‘thank you’ to Lambert as he sat back down on the other side of the glass.

Jaskier hooked his pinky around Geralt’s as the guitar intro started, needing that little bit of contact for the first line. When they’d written it it felt perfect. The audience knew exactly what kind of song they were about to hear and Geralt really hadn’t known if he would pull through. It took Jaskier right back to the dimly lit hospital room where he scrawled and scratched out lyrics to keep Geralt distracted from his upcoming surgery. The fear, the desperation, the little pockets of joy when they forgot where they were, the overwhelming love that Jaskier thought he’d never be able to fully give to Geralt all crept back up his throat as he took a breath for that stupid fucking first line.

His voice cracked partway through as he sang, making him fully grip Geralt’s hand, “I’m writing this in case I’m gone tomorrow,” By some miracle, he found his support for the next line, “I’m writing this in case I’ve moved along,”

For a moment he thought he’d gotten over the worst of it. A couple lines passed in relative ease, emotional but not so much it interfered with his craft. If he focused on looking at his microphone and keeping his breath supported he might make it through. Then Geralt joined him for the chorus.

“When the lights go down, Know that I am never far away. When the sun burns out, I’ll be waiting on the brighter side of grey.”

His harmony faltered and he involuntarily heaved a broken gasp in the middle of a line, desperately trying to focus on the mic that was now warped by the tears in his eyes.

Geralt broke off after the first word of his verse, turning to Jaskier and pulling him in again, “You alright, love?”

“I’m fine. I’m sorry,” Jaskier groaned in embarrassment as he clung to Geralt’s frame, “I’m being a baby. I wasn’t even the one hurt.”

“No you’re not,” Geralt argued, running his knuckles over Jaskier’s cheeks to wipe away his tears, “Here,” he moved their mics and stands close enough that they were shoulder to shoulder and their fingers could comfortably lace together.

Jaskier squeezed his hand gently and gave him a brave smile, “From the top?”

“From the top.”

This time Jaskier tried watching Geralt as they sang. He made it through the first chorus and got to just watch as Geralt sang his verse. The pang of emotion in his chest was still ever present, but it was manageable. Until he noticed Geralt having trouble.

On “All you get to keep is what you’ve shared,” Geralt squeezed his eyes closed and his grip on Jaskier’s hand tightened. The folk singer prepared, relaxed, readied himself to take a breath in. He was expecting that one to hurt after how much Geralt insisted upon it. How he threatened to get out of that hospital bed and scribble the line himself if Jaskier didn’t put it in. He wasn’t expecting the last line of the stanza to hurt. It had been comforting to the both of them at the time.

Geralt’s lip quivered and his voice was almost pinched as he sang out, “Remember no one ever really dies.”

Even being the one to write the melody, Jaskier missed the first three notes of the chorus, “Fuck. Shit. I’m so sorry.”

“No, that was on me,” Geralt sniffed and chuckled, “I knew you’d lose it if I did.”

“How do you do this?!” Jaskier exclaimed, chugging half the water bottle to keep the breakdown at bay.

Aiden’s voice came over their headphones, “Half our songs are his trauma and another quarter are group trauma. He’s got practice sweetheart.”

They tried a couple more times, even got through the whole song once with only minimal tears and one tasteful cracked note. But it was still a struggle for Jaskier to keep it together, and the more they sang, the more Geralt lost his iron grip on his composure.

“Look at me,” Jaskier instructed, moving Geralt to face him and adjusting their mics so they could sing to each other, “Just like when we wrote it. Except a little less pain.”

The joke earned a snort out of Geralt, exactly what Jaskier was aiming for, “This is supposed to be easier?”

“We can try?”

Jaskier did wonderfully for his verse, singing to Geralt was familiar and safe, even if the subject matter was terrifying. The chorus went well, but as soon as Geralt started to sing, Jaskier couldn’t exhale and it was all he could do not to sniff and ruin the take.

“If you’re hearing this I know you’re probly scared,” had tears falling down his cheeks again and Geralt’s voice cracked as his eyes welled up, “Nope,” he choked, “that’s worse. Much worse.”

“Fuck,” Jaskier gave a watery giggle as he wrapped his arms around Geralt’s middle, “Why did we decide to do this again?”

Geralt pressed a kiss to Jaskier’s hair, sniffling and holding him tight, “I think we’re sadists.”

“Back to back,” Eskel’s voice crackled in their ears, “Try it back to back.”

Leaning back to watch Jaskier’s reaction, Geralt hummed, “Do you want to? Or do you need a break?”

“Fuck it,” Jaskier shrugged, spinning Geralt around and following suit as he moved his equipment.

As they stood waiting for the tech to start the audio, Jaskier felt like he could really inhale for the first time all day. Geralt was there, he could feel his ribs expand against his back and his fingers tapping like a metronome on Jaskier’s palms. This is what they were missing when they wrote the damn song. The comfort of knowing someone is always at your back, that they’ll be there when it’s hard and even when you’re separated.

A warmth spread through Jaskier as the intro started and he felt ready. He still pressed back into Geralt on the harder lines, reminding himself he was still there, but they both made it through two full takes.

On the final one, as the recording of the softly picked guitar faded out, Jaskier couldn’t help but repeat two more lines, “When the lights go down, Know that I am never far away.”

His voice hung in the air for a beat, the sense of finality reverberating through the studio and bringing everything else to a stand still.

Geralt was the first to breathe, “Shit, we made it.”

“We fuckin made it,” Jaskier huffed, emotionally drained but immensely satisfied as he turned to hug Geralt from behind and press his cheek to his spine, “I love you.”

“I love you too. Let’s get a snack?”

“Yeah.”

When the sound tech played the potential mix for the first time, he tacked on an echoing, distant sounding recording of their conversation. Everyone looked at each other and nodded, goosebumps on their arms and that feral sparkle in their eyes that every artist gets when they’ve stumbled on something really exciting. They re-recorded some guitar and drums, but they kept the vocals exactly the same.

For the album art they wrote “I love you” on the tattered hospital stationary that had the lyrics and chords written on it and took a picture. Jaskier had the original framed and hung in their house as a little reminder.

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christ0pher-evans · 3 years

Text

Bewildered Heart

Part Three of the Shattered Heart Mini-Series

Pairings: Chris Evans x Reader Warnings: SMUT 18+ / Angst / Cheating / Arguing / Mentions of Divorce Word Count: 3.4k A/N: omg I finally made it to part three! I know a lot of you have been waiting a while for this so I really really appreciate your patience and support, it means the world to me!! Let me know all your thoughts and feelings! X Please reblog and like🖤

Part One: Shattered Heart Part Two: Troubled Heart

♡

As soon as you put the phone down, you were frustrated that you didn’t tell Chris that you loved him; of course you did. Nothing he could do would make you not love him, you committed your life to him and he was your husband, obviously you’d always love him. And then you realised, there is no shame in that. Even though he cheated on you, even though he broke your heart, there would always be love between you, forever and that was okay.

The clarity in your rationalised epiphany put your mind at ease. You knew that you were heading into this conversation with Chris with a clear mind, you knew you wanted to try and solve your issues without fighting, without causing a scene.

Taking a deep breath, you began to brew a pot of coffee as you heard keys unlocking your front door.

You turned around, and there he was. Standing at the other side of the breakfast bar, looking as handsome as ever, wedding band reflecting the sun coming through the patio doors. You subconsciously play with your own wedding ring, feeling an odd sense of relief knowing neither of you had taken them off.

“Hi..” you breathe out, surprisingly happy to see him.

Chris shuffled closer to you, blatantly nervous but wanting to be near you. You were apprehensive but didn’t stop him as he leaned in and kissed your cheek tenderly, hand delicately touching your waist.

Breath hitching in your throat at the titillating contact, you move away abruptly, unnerved by the arousing thoughts that enthralled your mind. Busying yourself with pouring two mugs of coffee, Chris sits at the breakfast bar waiting for you.

You sit opposite him, passing him a coffee as he mutters a thanks. His voice is gruff, as if he hasn’t spoken to anyone in two weeks and that’s when you notice he looks a little gaunt. Dark circles under his eyes and slightly scruffy hair adding to the look that insinuates he hasn’t been sleeping well. Your heart falters marginally, just purely because you hate seeing him like this, no matter the situation. That is what you tell yourself anyway, silently commanding yourself to not feel guilty for these circumstances, Chris has bought this all on himself.

Even as you tell yourself that, you hate how it sounds. That’s not you. You’re sympathetic and caring, and you love Chris, you shouldn’t want to see him punishing himself but that seems to be what he has done to you without even knowing; he has turned you into a nasty character.

Having an internal fight with yourself, you want to make small talk but you just can’t, you don’t have it in you to be civil and act nonchalant when there is a dark cloud looming over your marriage. Life is too short to dance around a conversation this important.

“So, um, I’m not going to dance around this because I’ve had two weeks to really digest what’s happened and think about what it means for us, for our marriage..”

Chris takes a sip from his coffee and looks at you, eyes boring into yours like you’re literally holding his heart in your hands, ready to mend it or crush it.

“I’m angry Chris. I’m really angry because even on my darkest days, when I was feeling like our marriage was falling apart, when I was feeling so alone; I never ever thought about kissing someone else. You have always been my only choice, yet you chose someone else?” It sounds like you’re asking him but in reality, you know he already chose someone else over you.

Your voice was shaky, tears already threatening to spill down onto your cheeks but you revel in how freeing it feels to tell Chris exactly what you are feeling. Your emotions finally organised enough to speak your truth.

Chris stays quiet, clearly knowing you well enough to know that you need to carry on telling him how you feel.

“..And I’m fucking sad Chris! All I keep thinking about is how, for the past year, I’ve been sacrificing my time to follow you around the world, sacrificing my happiness to spend minuscule amounts of time fighting for our marriage and you just came to expect it from me. You kept work as your number one priority and let me fall into second place, even when it jeopardised my happiness.”

“That was never my intention Y/N! I never wanted or want you to feel like that. Your happiness is so important to me, I promise it will never happen again!”

“Chris, you threw our marriage away. Like it was disposable and we could just be two friends living together, like we didn’t promise to spend our lives together. You can’t pretend like it’s going to be okay moving forward, because what if I don’t want to move forward?”

Your breath caught in your throat as your words hovered in the air. You knew that was serious statement to blurt out but you knew that you unintentionally meant it otherwise you wouldn’t have said it. This conversation was going to be full of hard truths and you knew this wasn’t a time to hold back, your marriage was at stake.

“Baby, you don’t mean that? Of course you want to move on, we both do. Put this behind us!” You could hear the panic in Chris’ voice.

“How can you say that? How can you say you want to move forward and you want me to move forward when you’re the reason its crumbling in the first place? You put us in this mess! You still have to see this woman every day, how do we move past that?”

You felt sick to your stomach. Never in a million years did you think you would be having this conversation with Chris, especially not once you said your vows. You had made promises and a bond that could never be broken yet here you were, trying to hold the pieces together.

“Chris, you told me you’d love and cherish me forever, you told me that on our wedding day. I told you that you were it for me, and you said it back to me, you-“, your voice broke as the tears started to fall, no longer being able to stay strong.

After your tears had subsided, you sniffed and dried your eyes, determined to raise your points.

“And you.. you said it back to me Chris. You told me I was your number one always, that I was your endgame, forever, infinitely yours. Yet, here I am, wondering why I’m second best to another woman.”

You exhale with force as you begin to feel slightly lighter after getting that off your chest. It definitely doesn’t feel good to admit that you’re not sure if your marriage has a future but you know you have to be truthful. Having so much more to say, you bite your lip to control your word vomit, knowing this is a conversation and not a speech; Chris needs to be allowed to say his piece too. Awaiting his response, you shudder as he reaches out and takes your hands in his.

“Y/N, sweetheart, you are my number one. That hasn’t changed, it never will. I love you. I married you because I want you, you have all of me, always.” He squeezes your hand tighter, putting emphasis on his words but also emphasis on his grip, subconsciously telling you not to let go.

“I know I sound like a broken fucking record sweetheart, but I am so sorry I kissed someone else, it was dumb, so fucking dumb and I can’t explain why I did it. I was just so lonely, so detached from you that I craved comfort.”

“I was fucking lonely too Chris! How do you think I felt when you were at work all the time surrounded by hundreds of people whilst I was sat at home alone trying to think of ways to save our marriage!” You snapped, yelling loud.

Chris sighed, releasing your hands and raising his own in defence.

“Sorry, I.. I didn’t mean it like that. I understand that you were lonely and I was too, we have to respect that we both felt the same but dealt with it very differently. But baby, I could be surrounded by hundreds or thousands of people at work but it would make no difference to me because they weren’t you.”

Knowing Chris was coming from a sweet place, you took a deep breath, needing a minute to collect your emotions before speaking.

“I’m sorry I snapped but it feels like we are going in circles Chris, it’s de ja vu from last year. When I told you how I was feeling, you just dismissed it to make the problems disappear but that’s not how this works. Solving our problems means we have to talk about them..” You could feel yourself getting emotional, working yourself back up into an exasperated state. “..but when you tell me that you feel really lonely because I’m not with you, why is your first though not to come home to me? Why did you continue to go out and kiss another woman? It clearly wasn’t that fucking lonely for you!”

You rolled your eyes dramatically. Feeling this overwhelming satisfaction with your vicious snipes, you knew this would quickly become a fight. The communication barrier was shattered and you had become spiteful, and it was only a matter of time before Chris followed suit.

Chris stood up, cursing angrily as the legs from the stool scraped against the wood flooring. Throwing his hands up in disgust, he scoffed.

“Argh seriously Y/N? What did you just say about not dismissing one another’s feeling?! And here you are, telling me I can’t be lonely because I kissed someone else! Me feeling lonely is the exact fucking reason I did it in the first place!!”

Chris was shouting now, his voice bellowing throughout your marital home. You stayed sitting as the anger poured from his body, feeling equally as bitter.

“So am I meant to assume that every time you feel lonely now, that you’re going to go and kiss another woman? Soon, when you’re feeling really lonely you’ll be fucking someone else! We are married Chris! Shit, I’m meant to be your wife, I’m meant to be the one you kiss and fuck! How would you like it if I went and kissed someone at work because I was sad?” You sneered, desperate to get under his skin now.

“Don’t be so ridiculous, I told you it was a mistake, a one-off! It’ll never happen again! We can sort this out!”

As both your words became more heinous, you couldn’t control yourself. The fact that Chris was now trying to sort out the problems that you’ve been trying to fix for a year just because he got caught out, was diabolical. He had fucked up and was paying the price and he couldn’t handle that. He was coming across like the victim and it was making you queasy.

“Are you fucking serious Chris!! I have been trying to sort out these problems for the past year and you’ve been having none of it, telling me that we are fine and the tough time would pass. Yet here we are..”

You hated what you were about to say but with the anger coursing through your veins, you couldn’t stop yourself.

“..Here we are, teetering on the edge of a fucking divorce because you couldn’t stay loyal to your own wife, because you couldn’t be a decent husband, a decent fucking human being and care about someone else but yourself!!”

The words hung in the air like someone had screamed bloody murder.

Without even realising, you had stood up and was now opposite Chris, chest heaving after spitting such venom in his face. Chris was staring at you like you had unleashed a monster, a raging devil that you had been hiding for a while.

You looked at him, eyes heavy and chest thumping. You bit your lip; terrified of your confession but power hungry from the buzz that being brutally honestly had given you.

Chris only raked his eyes over your body once before he was stalking towards you, pushing and pinning you against the counter, left hand instinctively wrapping around your throat, eyes dark with lust and desire.

Growling in a low, fierce tone, he muttered, “I’ve fucking cared for you every damn day of our marriage, I’ll never stop fucking caring for you because you are my wife. Mine. And I’ll never touch another woman again, because this..” He pauses to grind his cloth covered cock against you. “..this is too fucking good to give up.”

With those words snarled into existence, his lips were on yours. Ravishing you like water in a drought, starved of what he wants, what he owns. And in a really twisted way, you loved it. You were craving his dominance, his power to control you with his touch. No matter what happened, you would always surrender to him because you needed him, you wanted him.

You couldn’t help but whimper as Chris’s hand moved from your throat and travelled down to your hip, leaving a burning path over your breasts and down your stomach in his wake.

“Look at my pretty wife, all desperate for me.” Chris smirked as he trailed kisses all over your neck, pining you harder against the counter to control your squirming. You were ravenous for Chris and you were absolutely fed up of trying to hide it.

He pulled your dress over you in one swift movement, leaving you in just your panties. You looked back up at Chris with lust filled eyes whilst his own eye fucked your now almost naked body.

You couldn’t wait any longer whilst he enjoyed the view, you were too desperate for him.

“Chris, please..” you begged.

Your lips crashed back together furiously, teeth and tongues clashing instantly. Chris continued to assert dominance, lifting you up onto the counter easily and thrusting two fingers inside of you; eager to watch you submit your body to him. You gripped onto his shoulders as he held you up with one arm on the surface, still kissing him like your life depended on it.

But suddenly, it felt like it wasn’t enough, you needed to be closer to Chris, you needed to feel closer to Chris. Starting to fumble with his jeans, you knew what you wanted. It only took Chris a few seconds to realise your desires and he was clearly more than happy to comply, allowing you to undo his jeans and push them down far enough to pull him free from his boxers. Your mouth watered at the sight of him, your core tightening around his fingers at the feeling you knew was coming.

He pulled his fingers out of your core, bringing them to his lips and licking them clean. Your stomach flipped at the view in front of you but your core ached to feel him inside of you again.

“Two weeks without tasting you is far too long baby girl..”

You groan before he smacks his lips against back against your own, even more turned on at the thought of tasting yourself on his lips.

Chris pulled back sharply, grabbing a fistful of hair at the back of your head and forcing you to look down between you both whilst the other hand guided himself to your entrance. Chris was already fully hard, ready and waiting for this moment, this feeling.

“I want you to watch baby. I want you to see me taking what’s mine. I want you to remember that there is no one else that can make you feel this good, remember that no one else can satisfy me like you do. This is mine, you’re mine and I’m taking it back.”

You felt weak under the spell Chris was casting on you. Hanging off of his every word, you felt like the twenty-something girl that met Chris all those years ago, giddy at your obsession with one another. Giddy with the feeling of being happy and in love.

Chris pushed into you. Your eyes rolled back at the feeling of him stretching you open, pushing himself further and further into you until you had swallowed him whole. Your mind reeling at the feeling you’d missed so badly.

Immediately picking up the pace, Chris was thrusting into you harshly, hitting the spot that only he could find. Your kisses were sloppy, rushed and desperate as he kept up his relentless pace.

You knew this wouldn’t last long; the culmination of passion, urgency and anger fuelling the fire you were feeling that you had been craving for two weeks now. The desperation of needing to feel your husbands touch was intense, but neither of you wanted it to last long. It was clear this wasn’t about love or reconciliation, this was about need and ownership; proving that you only belonged to one another, no matter what happened. This was a reminder of that feeling, to anchor yourselves together again.

As Chris maintained his toe-curling pace, your fingers fumbled down to your clit, clumsily dancing over the sensitive bud and adding to your already overwhelming pleasure.

Chris looked at you before spitting a splurge of saliva down onto your clit, moistening the area against the touch of your fingers. As it dripped through your fingers and over your clit and core, you were fiercely encompassed with your desire for this man. This sex was filthy, messy and downright the sexiest fuck you’d ever had together.

As you looked back up at Chris, panting heavily from your arousal, you kissed him lewdly. Biting down hard on his bottom lip, you pulled it in between your teeth; drawing out his own chokes of pleasure.

Chris was close, you knew he was but so were you. The feeling of powerlessness washed over you as your orgasm began to build. Chris was in complete control of your body, clawing to pull every inch of pleasure to the surface before he let you cum. His thrusts became erratic, pushing you further than ever before as your body started to tremble.

“Chris, please..”, you begged again.

“I told you this was too good to give up baby girl! Take it, take all of me!”

With your legs trembling, you gripped Chris’s biceps tightly, nail marks cutting into his perfect skin as your orgasm shot through you. Chris grunted a ‘good girl’ as you came and his thrusts faltered, his own orgasm jolting through his body.

You stayed there, heads resting together and chests heaving, the only sounds filling the room was your dizzying panting.

Slowly, as your head returns from the clouds, you realise what you’ve done. The repercussions of having sex with Chris amongst this mess was only going to complicate things further. How do you tell Chris that you might want a divorce after doing that with him? How do you make an educated decision with that playing on your mind? This man consumes you, his love consumes you and you never want to lose it but are you just love-drunk, not seeing the bigger picture?

Chris brings you back to reality, helping you down off the violated countertop. You quickly redress, never giving Chris eye contact and staying silent. Your head spinning from the last hour; from arguing and screaming to fucking on the kitchen counter.

“Sweetheart, are you alright?” Chris says sheepishly.

You look at him and shake your head, muttering a ‘no’.

“Look Y/N, I know we said a lot of things we didn’t mean-”

“Chris, stop..” you cut him off, “I meant everything I said. This isn’t something we can dodge, we have to be truthful, our marriage is on the line and I really don’t think you understand that?”

“But.. I- We just..” Completely at a loss for words, Chris stays quiet.

“I think you should leave Chris.” You whisper as yet another tear falls from your eyes.

Chris just nods his head, noticeably shocked by your words. He quickly kisses your cheek before hurrying out the door. As soon as the door shuts, you collapse onto the wood floor. Feeling Chris over every part of you, you feel even more confused than earlier. Your mind and body clearly want Chris, so why isn’t it that easy for your heart to make that decision?

♡ Final Part: Healed Heart

Forever Tags: @itsscottiesstark @patzammit @partypoison00 @cynic-spirit @n3ssm0nique @sohoseb @madbaddic7ed @moonlacebeam@ilovetheeagles @beautifulrose0809 @lovelyladymayyy@tenaciousperfectionunknown @mysticapples17 @whxre4cevans @firoozehmoon [Please drop me a message if you’d like to become part of the taglist for this series or any of my work]

#shattered heart mini series #troubled heart #bewildered heart #chris evans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans mini series #chris evans x reader #chris evans x you #rpf #smut

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babiesdreams · 3 years

Note

I really love the way you write!! You make the situations seem real and I'm loving it!❤ I was wondering if you could do a jealous Yuta scenario that ends in sex? I'm new to sending requests, so I'm sorry if my request is very vague.\🍄

Thanks for liking my content babe ^_^. And don’t worry I all requests are valid love <3

Testing my patience +18 Nakamoto Yuta.

Warnings: fingering, praise kink, teasing, cum control, edging,

Your fingers caress the screen, slowly, as if you could really feel the boy. "What are you doing?" Yuta asks from the distance. His voice seems like a mere memory of what your relationship used to be, a simple audio record from a golden era.

"I love this idol" You reply softly, still mesmerized by Taeyong's figure as he walks over the stage. "I don't see anything special in him, to be honest" The boy replies, brushing away your words as if they were meaningless.

"Maybe I like him because he's kind" You spit out, wanting to create a reaction in the boy, wanting him to notice the problem without needing to directly tell him. "Am I not kind?" He asks, offended by your words. "Lately... not so much" You simply reply, not getting your eyes off the screen.

"What the fuch does that mean?" He asks, getting closer to where you were sitting , yet you don't stop looking at the screen where your favourite idol was still dancing like it was nothing.

"Look at me" Yuta orders but you don't turn to look at him. "I said look at me" He repeats, this time with an angry tone, as his hand forces your chin to turn in his direction. His eyes get lost as soon as they meet yours, completely losing any sign of anger that they could have been holding.

"Do you still love me?" Is the only thing Yuta can say with a broken voice tone that makes your heart skip a beat. You look down, intimidated by his powerful brown eyes and the depth his expresion gave them. "Look at me" He repeats again, lifting your face slightly more.

"Of course I love you Yuta. But you've been cold to me lately... I always loved to feel the warmth of your love and affection, after a long day of work. You always made me melt for your words and your touch and now I barely get to hear your voice, and I felt like I was losing you, like I needed to look for a new warmth in my life to survive. So the question here is: Do you still love me?"

His eyes switch from looking into both of your eyes, not knowing how to take your words in or how to answer properly. "I do, of course I love you" He finally says. His hand moves slightly, from a forced hold of your chin to a gentle caress on your cheek.

"I'm so sorry that I acted like that baby, I was too busy working and I didn't even think of that. I promise I'll take more time for you and I'll try my best to show you how much I love you everyday, okay?" You simply nod, noticing the genuine tone in his voice and his eyes that were now full of tears from realizing just how different his sense of reality and yours were.

His face gets closer to yours and you let your eyelids close, to help you get lost in the sensation of his soft red lips. It always gets you, the way his lips feel against yours, the way his tongue moves inside your mouth and how his hand makes patterns across your soft skin. That sensation that always helped you get away from reality and get a dreamy thought to cross your mind.

But, as always, that sensation soonly breaks, turning into a far more overwhelming one, turning into that one thing that the whole planet could die for, turning into a heated lust thought that can't go away from your brain. His body lays on top of yours, his hand trapping yours, as his tongue gets off your mouth, only to travel along the already familiar highway of your neck, slowly getting lower and closer to your cunt.

But it's his hand the first one to get into your panties, slowly spreading the wet fluids along your folds before he makes circles on your clit. You can't help but moan against his shoulder while he looks at your expression mesmerized by the views. "You're doing so good baby" He says, with a deep voice that has you rolling your eyes back out of satisfaction.

Yuta smirks at the sounds you make and, after a short while, he gets down on you. You're only wearing a bra at this point and his tongue moves over your folds in a way tha you truly can't resist and sooner than you could've imagined you feel your climax close. But you're not the only onw who notices, as your body softly shakes due to pleasure, making Yuta realize the situation.

"What a good girl, you're already so close huh?" He says, and you simply nod, admitting the embarrassing truth. But his moves completely stop, getting you to experience a painful edge. He gets closer to you, as you calm down, and stop your heavy breathing. He kisses you softly, as if he didn't just edge you to death, hiding his mischief behind an innocent curtain.

Once you're all calmed down, his fingers come back, pushing inside of you as they curl, massaging your g-spot in soft and slow circles. "Fuck" You whisper to yourself, making Yuta chuckle at your reaction. "I'll get you back, you demon" You say to him, but his reaction is to speed up his moves, making you get closer to your climax once again.

"Y-Yuta" You moan out and his brows instantly arc, as if asking what you wanted to say. "Can I cum please?" You ask but his answer is short and clear: "No" You roll your eyes, in despair, yet you would be lying if you said you weren't enjoying it.

It goes on like that for six more times, until you're shaking heavingly, desparate to get relief in any form. And that is enough for Yuta to give up and let you cum messingly. Your moans are louder than they've ever been and your expression looks more satisfied than his, even if he's enjoying the moment to its fullest.

"You did amazing baby, so so good" He says in a deep voice that has you losing it completely. His hand caresses your cheek slowly, as your body calms down from your high and you can properly rest for a second.

"It's been a nice session" The boy says, trying to get away with it, but your arm quickly grabs his shirt and pulls him back before you say "We haven't finished, demon"

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I hope you liked it, It feels nice to write something after a long time ^^

Masterlist –requests open– How to request? Check out your score.

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bugbeee · 2 years

Note

hornet?

I’M SO SORRY THIS IS LATE! But I MANAGED TO DO IT EVENTUALLY! So here she is! The best girl!

(Headcanon ask meme from here!)

Headcanon A - realistic: Hornet does not know how to really interact with people beyond violence or distant acknowledgment. Most of this is due to the sheer length of time she’s gone without really talking to people before warding them off. Additionally, she really hates the adventurers that come into Hallownest to try and pick it clean, since she views it as an attack on her territory. Lemm can stay purely because he is actively cataloguing and recording history, and someone other than her needs to know Hallownest’s story.

Headcanon B - while it may not be realistic it is hilarious: I am all for baby!Hornet playing with Hollow propaganda, and will love it till the day I die. Once she’s grown up, and with Hollow and Ghost (who are FINE), she very much acts like a long-suffering older sister to Ghost, and regularly asks Hollow if she was this bad as a child. They tell her she was worse, and she throws juice at them.

Headcanon C - heart-crushing and awful, but fun to inflict on friends: After Dream No More, Hornet has a breakdown. The infection is gone, but at what cost? Everyone she knows and loves and could have loved is dead and gone, leaving her this broken kingdom that will likely never flourish again. I think she sticks around for a little while, trying to see if she could make a village or community from what remains, but would eventually find it pointless. At some point, she may even force herself to enter the Wasteland. Maybe forgetting everything is for the best after all...

Headcanon D - unrealistic, but I will disregard canon about it because I reject canon reality and substitute my own: She was endlessly fascinated by the Pale King’s horns and his light, and would crawl all over him as a child, much to his confusion and horror. Root found it hilarious, and would regularly egg her on. She would also actively interrupt Dreamer meetings to show off drawings and give her own opinion, which Lurien would take very seriously, perching her on his knee and nodding every time she babbled. She was very much loved within the palace.

Thank you all for your patience, and I hope you enjoy!

#ask #ask game #brainshittery #(i love your username so much)#unregisteredcookie #ofstormsandfire #bug talks #hollow knight #hornet hollow knight #hornet #writing #headcanons

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llamakenma · 3 years

Note

hii! first of all, congratulations on 500 followers! can’t wait to see your account grow much more! second of all, may i request a kageyama fic with prompts 4 and 11 (if possible, 11 being kageyama’s line)? thank you so much, hope you have a great day! remember to drink water and do not skip meals! :)

(also, this is my very first request so i hope this is how it’s done aksjsjwdj. if not, well, that’s embarrassing. .-.)

note: hello!! thank you so much!! i hope you will love this for your first request!! have a great dayy.

request: prompt 4 (" you made me think i actually mattered." ) + prompt 11 ("don't look at me like that, did you really expect things to be different this time.")

genre: playboy kageyama au!, cheating au!

requests for 500 follower event are closed!

---

you had your fair share of enjoyable moments with kageyama tobio: the moments in which your heart swells with utter happiness that made you feel like it could burst. yet, dating him was like a premium subscription.

he was available to many others, and he did not hesitate to take advantage of this. he did not back out from the fact that he could be with many others- and in fact, he would always tell you about this. it was like a broken record, he would repeat this fact over and over again- making sure that the fact was incorporated deep inside your head.

albeit, it has its perks. the perks that made you forget about the chaos and the wrongs that he had committed- ones in which made you dwell in the thought of a perfect fantasy. you are naive, you would admit, but in your defense, kageyama tobio was much more than he let on.

it was the warm cuddles on a snowy day, his warmth against yours and your hands in his, that made you feel like you were the only one who would get to stay with him like this. it was the late-night carnival dates that he would drag you to, despite having an early morning training the following day, that sparked the feelings you had for him. it was those charming words and sweet promises that made you held onto him for longer than you should.

yet, if you said you did not regret any second spent with him, you would be lying. sure, he made you feel like you mattered more than anyone else, but your relationship had never been one that was stable- it had always been on and off: every time you had found him mingling with another person, he would break it off, only to come back three days later asking for forgiveness, and like a fool you were, you did. you forgave him easily that first time, just because he had promised you that he would never do this again.

oh the irony, it was not even a good week before you had found him again, with another person in his arms, and so it went on, not once, not twice, but countless times, yet you were there, you were a place that always welcomed the man you utterly loved, and he would always run back to you whenever he needed.

nevertheless, even the patience you had, had been wearing thin, it had been since the second time you found him, cheating on you with some chick that he probably wouldn't even glance a second time at. and that thin piece of patience, finally tore when you found him in the empty classroom that he had told you to come, exchanging saliva with yet another person.

you grabbed him by the collar, pulling him away from the mess he had created.

'kageyama, we need to talk."

he signaled his makeout partner to leave the room, before looking into your eyes.

"hey y/n, what's up?" "what's up? kageyama, really? what's up? you were cheating on me kageyama tobio, you promised me that you wouldn't do this again!" you glared at him, accusing him of the broken promise.

"and so? you actually believed me? and don't give me that look, did you really expect things to be different this time?"

"yea you're right kageyama, i honestly don't know why I've been welcoming you with open arms again and again. but kageyama, why? why did you make me feel like i actually mattered if you were just going to cheat on me again? why did you not just let me go once and for all kageyama? why! tell me!" you yelled, pulling on his collar once again.

you couldn't hold back the tears, whether from anger or sadness you did not know, from falling even though the last thing you wanted to do was to cry in front of the boy who had made you feel like you were nothing more than trash at this moment.

" you know what kageyama? forget it, just please forget everything we had had in the past three years, please just forget all those happy moments we had." you scoffed, "you probably don't even remember them, what am i even saying?"

"goodbye, kageyama, i hope you live a great life without me."

you finally released his collar, before patting his shoulder gently, just as a last reminder of the relationship, it was about time you moved on from the boy who changed for the worse since the first time you've met him.

#tobio kageyama x reader #kageyama x reader #kageyama tobio x reader #kageyama scenarios #kageyama #kageyama angst #kageyama tobio #haikyuu #haikyuu x gn!reader #haikyuu fanfic #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu x reader angst #haikyuu x gender neutral reader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu angst

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1kook · 4 years

Text

subdued

— good boy joon on his bday x fem reader

summary; He could so easily take you over in the bedroom, push you down and ram himself inside until you cried. But it’s the other way around, and he likes it that way. tags; birthday boy joon, solo rapper joon, college student reader (unspecified year/age lol), this entire fic is based off THIS joon everyone look and never forget him warnings; kissing, blowjobs, grinding, unprotected, birthday sex, sub!joon word count; 5k

notes; hoooo boy, if you think my other fics were self-indulgent, this one is straight from my 3 am thoughts... anyway. i actually have the same birthday as joon so this fantasy plays off very different in daydream universe no. 794 lol but i understand not everyone is as lucky as us sept 12 babies so i adjusted it 😌

The stoplight down the street from his building takes the longest. He had warned you of its faulty mechanics the very first time you visited. It lingered on red a beat too long, wasted precious seconds you could be spending with him. It’s been the sole challenger to your patience this past year. Every time you wanted to visit him, it was this same stoplight that held you up— made the sugar in his coffee cup settle, the food in its container go cold. It absolutely dampened your mood.

Today, it’s from the back of an Uber that you watch the red glow of the light, gaze fading in and out of focus. It’s raining, the rhythmic pattering of raindrops against the wind shield hypnotizing you. There’s a styrofoam box of takeout beside you falling into the same fate as all its predecessors, tucked inside a plastic bag. It’s his favorite today, the black bean noodles down the street from your university paired with a sickeningly sweet fizzy drink. (There’s a cheap bottle of wine too, but he was never one for getting shitfaced so it had a slim chance of consumption.)

The longer the light stalls, the more nervous you become. One glance at your phone tells you it’s nearing eleven forty-nine, your last message to him just a few minutes before. It was a slew of sad faces as you apologized for the fifth time that night. Another minute ticks by and you’re suddenly hit with the overwhelming fear that you won’t make it on time.

It was Namjoon’s birthday.

At least it would be for the next ten minutes.

You hadn’t seen him all day, your usual Saturday morning brunch postponed by your conflicting schedules. You had a huge group project coming up, and the other students in your group all had lives of their own, jobs, sports, dates, that made their schedules hard to work around. Namjoon, too, was busy gearing up for the release of his mixtape, a collection of songs he had worked hard on for the better half of the year.

He had been planning for this since you first met, around this time the previous year. It was all he ever spoke about these days, which was both endearing and worrisome. Regardless of how you felt about his avid dedication towards his mixtape, you would continue to support him through it all.

You were supposed to drop by after your last class, but one thing led to another and suddenly you were babysitting your neighbor’s kids as she ran off to the hospital. You had felt bad for her, something about a relative in an accident, and had said yes without thinking through what exactly that meant. Two overexcited children and a kitchen lined in cake batter, is what it meant. Your neighbor had returned a little before eleven, and by then you were really cutting it close.

The order you placed had been ready when you got to the little restaurant, and, deciding to forgo bus stop waiting times, the Uber came quickly enough. Because things can never go your way, there was a small accident on one of the major streets that set you back, leading to your driver taking an abrupt detour that you doubt was helpful, and now you were here.

You bite down on your lower lip for probably the umpteenth time, flipping your phone around to check the time. 11:52.

The light changes a second later, your chauffeur for the evening slowly easing his foot off the break and sending the two of you one step closer to your boyfriend. The movement doesn’t ease your nerves in the slightest, foot tapping wildly against the carpeted flooring of the backseat as you think of that creaky elevator. Will it be on your side today? Or will it force you to run four flights of stairs up to his floor?

You won’t know until you get there, absentmindedly tipping the poor soul who bore witness to the rolling waves of tension that had swamped your body tonight. You can only hope it’s an appropriate bill, taking off toward the front doors of his building. The water on the sidewalk splashes beneath your frantic footsteps, tickling your bare ankles. The black boots you wore that day did nothing to save you, a small gust of cold air trying to sweep up beneath the thin material of your dress, luckily to no avail.

The front area is as empty as it usually is, though you doubt the late hour would change that. Knuckle jammed harshly against the flickering elevator button, you wait impatiently for it to descend. His small label takes up the entirety of the fourth floor, studios squeezed beside meeting rooms and offices. It was by no means a monster record label, but it had gained enough fame from the quality soloists it produced over the years; Namjoon was quickly becoming one of those. The carriage is on the fifth floor, right above his, the digital panel beside you says. It passes his floor, passes the fourth, and then… nothing.

You curse every deity in the universe as you watch it freeze on the second floor. You had been so close, you groan, kicking the tip of your shoe against the metal doors. It does nothing to fix the broken elevator, and with one heavy sigh, you turn to the flight of stairs. It was 11:54 now.

The stairway is silent, off-grey concrete walls mocking you as the time continues to tick down. Holding the plastic bag to your chest, you start up the stairs in a hurry. The rustling of the bag grows annoying quickly, your thighs aching half way up. The platforms between floors provide nearly no reprieve before you ascend the next level of stairs, heaving for air as you turn onto the final platform before his floor. Your hair sticks uncomfortably to the back of your neck.

You can’t fling the door open fast enough, heart hammering between your rib cage. The hallway is filled with blissful air conditioning, nothing like the stuffy air of the staircase. You relish in it for a second before taking down the winding halls, torpedoing straight into the room your boyfriend’s in.

“Happy birthday,” you gasp, only hoping you made it in on time. Your sudden appearance has him whirling around in surprise, dark eyes nearly bulging out of their sockets at his surprise intruder. The digital clock above one of his speakers blinks back at you. 11:59.

The surprise wears off soon enough. Namjoon melts back into his puffy chair, easy going smile taking over his features as he regards your ruffled appearance. “Jesus, what’ve you been up to?” he teases playfully, standing up to relieve you of the bag in your hand, still warm against your chest.

He brushes a kiss against your forehead, placing the plastic bag somewhere off behind him before enveloping you in your arms. “Thank you, baby,” he hums, strong arms wrapped around your shoulders. Almost immediately the tension in your body melts away, oozes out of your skin as you bury yourself against his chest. It feels good to be there, the faint cologne from that morning clinging to his white zip-up.

“Sorry I’m so late,” you murmur. Feeling comforted enough, you pull away from your hiding spot against his chest. The arms hanging loosely around your waist don’t let you get too far, low-lidded eyes staring down at you over the straight angle of his nose. “So much happened today— I’m sorry.”

Namjoon waves your apologies off as he guides you towards his computer chair. He plops down first, pulling you over to sit on his thigh. The clock ticks by, and suddenly his birthday is over. The scent of the noodles fills his dark studio, and you become acutely aware of the soft melody drifting from his speakers. Nothing too developed yet, just a simple piano with a bass drum kicking in.

“Another year, another grey hair,” he sighs, leaning back against his seat. You laugh at his dramatics, running a finger through the head full of silver hairs he’s rocking this time around.

“I fail to see the issue,” you muse, shifting about until you can loop your arms around his neck, pulling his face close enough to yours to kiss. He lets you, opening his mouth when your tongue prods against his plush, doll lips. He tastes of that energy drink you know is bad for him, the one that keeps him up way past his nonexistent bedtime. You should scold him for it, but there’s something about the way he molds his mouth against yours that makes it difficult to pull away and do so. You kiss him for a few minutes, lips casually molding against each other.

The enticing scent of the food you brought over has you pulling away with a soft smack of your lips, lazily grinning down at him. “You should eat,” you encourage, attempting to move out of his grip. If anything, the hands on the small of your back stiffen, keeping you comfortably pressed against him.

“Don’t want to,” he whines, half-lidded eyes gazing at you with that tender look. He leans back in, nudges his nose against yours until you’re moving to accommodate him again. His lips catch yours a second time, a soft sigh released on his end. His body feels like a furnace, swaddled up in that nice white tracksuit, some fancy brand he’s an ambassador for. There’s something about him that’s different today, cherry lips catching you in a daze. He seems totally aware of the pull he has over you, moving his mouth against yours like he knows he’s won you over and was now ready to dedicate the rest of the night to you.

You weren’t having any of that, at least not tonight.

Knitting your hands in his hair, you tug. You tug and tug until he’s releasing you with a whine, swollen red lips shiny from your lip gloss. It’s certainly a look on him, and as he pants beneath you, you’re left wondering why he’s chosen to be an elusive rapper when his doll-like face could easily blend into the idol world.

Another mystery you’ll never solve.

“Missed you today,” he admits bashfully, lips pulling into a shy smile he tries to hide from you. You reward his confession with a soft peck against his cheek, hands cupping his soft cheeks between your palms. Despite how easily you’d been forgiven before, there’s a tinge of a whine curling around his next words. “Who blows someone off on their birthday?” he mumbles, eyes fluttering shut.

You chuckle, tracing your thumbs over his skin. They just barely brush against the corners of his mouth, the soft flesh begging to be touched. “Who spends their birthday cooped up in a tiny room?” you reply teasingly, leaning in to kiss the mole beneath his plump lips.

Namjoon inhales softly, head lolling backwards as you kiss down his chin, over his pulse point. “Was inspired,” he weakly defends, the grip around your waist growing tight. “There was a pretty girl in my dreams last night.”

“Oh?” You hum, slithering off his lap. The floor mat he has beneath his rolling chair to protect his hardwood floors is cold. There’s ridges on it that press uncomfortably into your knees. But all that is forgotten when you roll your hands over his shoulders, kiss his neck tenderly, and he groans. “How pretty?”

Your back is straining from being awkwardly stretched over him in a desperate attempt to kiss the entire column of his neck. He doesn’t make it easier, hips wiggling before you as you nip against the side of his neck. “Joon?” you coo, sliding your hands down his chest. The muscles jump beneath his zip-up, one shuddering exhale escaping him.

“R-Real fuckin’ gorgeous,” he mumbles, hands circling your shoulders. He wants to pull you close like he always does, but you can tell he’s equally as conflicted by the need to push you down onto his cock.

The front zip of his sweater gives with one tug, the clicks of the teeth coming apart following your hand down. He’s wearing a plain white shirt underneath, the beginnings of sweat clinging to the flimsy material. You place your hands around his waist, let the fabric catch over your knuckles as you glide them upwards. The sinewy muscle quivers under your touch, Namjoon’s breath catching in your throat.

When you reach his pecs, he barely contains the whimper in his throat, hands releasing you in favor of clutching at the armrest. “Please,” he huffs, the white zip-up halting you from pushing any further. “Off.”

“Of course,” you purr, pushing it over his deltoids. He doesn’t shake the sweater off completely, the sleeves catching over each other in his haste to feel you closer against his body. The t-shirt remains tugged up to his chest, held up by your wandering hands. “Relax for me, okay?” you croon, leaning forward to nip at his lower lip. The plush skin bounces back, redder than ever. He nods shakily, chest rising and falling.

You place a kiss directly on his sternum, his heart fluttering wildly just a few inches away. You feel it beneath your palm, the way it beats wildly out of rhythm for you. The music loops back around, the same melodious tune mixing with his airy sounds. You trail your mouth lower, letting it mold against the faint ridges over his abdomen.

He’s been putting on muscle these last few months. It’s a sight you only get to appreciate in moments like these. Namjoon wasn’t a flashy performer; he was too shy to wear revealing outfits, not that they particularly fit his onstage aesthetic anyway. He liked it simple and dark, wanting his words to capture people more than his looks.

It was a humble approach, really, because you don’t doubt for a second someone with looks of his caliber couldn’t pull fans with that alone. But as you said before, Namjoon didn’t like that sort of thing, and you suppose that’s why he’s declined invitations to join rookie boy groups time and again. He had worked hard to make himself known on his own, frequenting various hip hop scenes until he picked up steam. By the time you’d met him, he had his own contract, with this same company you’re currently in.

Now he was freshly twenty-six, on the cusp of releasing his first full mixtape, completely of his own creativity. His first mini-album had done extraordinarily well, but there had been a lot of outside partners and producers that pushed it along. This mixtape was one hundred percent him, a fact you couldn’t be more proud of.

What better way to treat him than to shower him in attention like this?

You press a soft kiss to his belly button, glancing up just in time to see those plush lips pull into a smile, pearly white teeth appearing in between, eyes fluttered shut. The waistband of his matching bottoms stretches easily enough, giving you a brief view of the dark underwear he’s got underneath. You let it snap back into place, relishing in the tiny gasp he gives. “You’re acting extra sweet for me today, aren’t you?” you smirk, running a palm over the bulge beneath his pants. His knuckles tighten dangerously against his armrests.

“I’m the same,” he chokes out, eyes rolling to the back of his head when you give his outline a teasing squeeze. “Just… lower please.”

His statement is followed with one hand on the back of your head, tentatively urging you closer to his stiff member just an inch. He’s so polite and shy tonight, cheeks tinted a nice rosy color as he looks away from your lewd expression practically salivating over the prize hidden beneath his clothes. His bottoms come down around his thighs, throbbing cock bouncing up to tap his stomach.

“Oooh,” you say appreciatively, taking him in your hand. Namjoon flinches, a groan catching in his throat as you trail your fingers over his cock. They end at the tip, swollen and red; you can’t help yourself as you duck down, kissing the tip softly. Namjoon full on shivers, hips bucking against your touch.

“Please, just... touch,” he begs, wiggling around underneath you.

You nod, pulling away to plant your hands against his hips. “Have to sit still for me, big boy,” you remind him, pushing down until his bottom glues itself firmly to the leather padding of his chair again. He does so with a huff. Clouded eyes meet yours, so beautifully framed by the blood that rushes to his face.

Despite calming him just moments before, the first kiss against his tip makes him squirm and buck like a wild stallion, your name falling from his lips like a mantra. Eventually he calms down, labored breath fanning across his chest as he watches you lower your mouth down around his cock. It twitches in your hand, one perfect pearl of cum oozing from the tip. It’s barely rolled down past his head when you strike, the tip of your tongue scooping it up quickly.

A little on the salty side, but it still makes you shudder. Above you, Namjoon isn't faring that well either. He groans, hands clenched over the armrest as he tries his best to be good for you. “More,” he says hoarsely, silver hair dangling over his eyes. It creates a curtain between you two, his beautiful expression hidden from your view.

You ease his cock down your mouth. It feels just as good as you remembered. Your knees ache from being on the ground, but you wouldn’t trade places with anyone in the world right now. An inaudible moan resonates from above you, his back going stiff the further down you swallow him. You could practically feel yourself drooling, excess saliva making his entrance into your mouth so much easier. You get about two thirds down before it becomes difficult, lips pulled taut around his swollen member. The tip is reaching dangerous territory now, nudging against the soft spot in the back of your throat.

You could gag, but that would only startle him away, make him worry about you. You don’t want that, not when he’s melting into his seat with every inch you swallow. So you push the discomfort away, focus on feeling the entirety of his cock in your mouth.

“Fuck,” he whines, shaking his silvery locks away from his eyes when he leans forward to look at you. You take extra care to bat your lashes up at him; he obviously likes the sight, his lower lip catching between his teeth for the umpteenth time that night.

When you finally surpass that initial discomfort, his cock wonderfully resting in your mouth and throat, everything becomes so much better. The drag against your lips feels almost heavenly, never mind the fact it would certainly leave the skin around there soft and tender tomorrow. It’s something you’re willing to overlook, running the flat length of your tongue against the underside of his cock to distract him.

You make one hand busy, reaching down to cup his balls. The skin is soft, but tight, like it’s taking everything in him not to bust right now. The other situates itself loosely against his hip, thumb drawing slow circles against the skin. He’s grown hotter since you’ve gotten here, like your own personal furnace.

He’s a good boy, through and through.

It had admittedly taken a while to tame his wildness; there had been a time where he would push your head down his cock the second your lips touched his mouth. Now, he fared pretty well against his own carnal instincts, blunt nails digging into the armrests in order to stop himself. Thanks to this, you’re able to pick up a comfortable pace against his cock, bobbing up and down between his thighs.

“M-More,” he pants, muscles trembling from the exertion it takes for him to hold himself back. “Please,” he throws in.

You appease him, letting go of his balls to grip the base of his cock. He hisses at the touch, hips unconsciously jumping. You hold him tight, squeezing his cock between your palm until his thighs are quivering too. The descent down his cock is easier too, no longer trying to swallow him up whole every time.

It only calms him for so long before that same plea is falling from his lips again. This time, you pull off completely, lazily jerking him off as you rest an elbow on his thigh, chin falling into your open palm as you analyze his figure. “Always need more,” you sigh, the slippery sound of your hand mingling with his little moans.

Namjoon’s jaw tightens, head falling forward until his chin touches his chest. “Would like to fuck now,” he seethes, his t-shirt growing damp at the collar from all the sweating he’s been doing.

“Is that so?” You smile. As you say this, you loosen your grip, letting your hand fall away much to his dismay. “Your clothes, Joon,” you explain, using his thighs as leverage to push yourself to your feet again. There’s creases on the skin over your knees, skin and joints tender from the position. That gets pushed to the back burner as you watch Namjoon finally fight his way out of his clothing, hands stuck in the sleeves of his zip-up.

“Off, off,” he huffs, eventually tugging it off all inside out. The shirt is next, neck hole stretched huge as he peels it away from his body.

You muffle a giggle behind your palm, placing a hand on his bare shoulder when he’s done. He’s looking at you with those same, desperate eyes, stealing your heart without even realizing. “Adorable,” you tease only to watch the blood crawl over his ears and down his neck. You throw a leg over him, his thigh pressing against yours. Before you can mount him you’re tugging off the thin jacket you’d worn that day, pawing it off until only the thin barrier of your dress is between the two of you.

With both knees pressed to either side of him, you finally show him what he wants to see. The sundress you’d worn that day makes everything so accessible. The flimsy material stretches over your ass, sits pretty around your waist to reveal your sheer panties. The sight makes Namjoon groan, eyes downcast as he fights to see your pussy. You return his gaze with a hand against his jaw. “Look at me, sweetheart,” you murmur, looping your hands around his head, finding their place on the nape of his neck first. Your fingers instinctively run through his locks, drawing an airy gasp from him.

“Yes,” he breathes, lower lip brushing against yours from such close proximity. You smile down at him, easing your core down on him. His cock pressed against your clothed panties, leaving a wet trail against the exterior side of them.

He fits snugly between your folds, hesitant hands resting at your hips like he wants to grind you down but knows better than to attempt such a bold move. You reward his behavior with a faint kiss against his cheek. “Good boy, Joonie,” you praise, barely containing your own gasp as you wiggle over his cock. “Being so nice for me today,” you sigh, grinding down against him.

Namjoon shivers, cock throbbing against your soiled panties. “Always good for you,” he groans, a trail of sweat running down from his hairline.

Another kiss is pressed against his face, this time against his cheekbone as you begin grinding back and forth. “That’s right,” you confirm, hugging him tight to your chest, until his face is practically buried between your breasts. “Even on your birthday,” you sigh, stretching a hand behind you to tug your panties to the side. The first glide of his cock against your folds has him bucking against you, a choked gasp escaping both your lips.

“I-Yes,” he cries, hands wrapped tight around you.

You bite down a whimper, his length running over every inch of your folds. It makes your toes curl when he stimulates your clit. Your attention had been solely on making him feel good tonight, that the barest amounts of pleasure to your own body was enough to make you shake. “Tell me,” you pant, moving back to grab him by the shoulders as you run against his length. “What you would do if you weren’t my good boy.”

Namjoon cries at your sudden pace, head lolling back as he fights every instinct in his body telling him to just fuck right into your inviting heat. “Can’t,” he sobs, eyes squeezed shut.

“Joon,” you growl, snapping your hips forward roughly. “Tell me.”

He shakes his head with another whimper, thigh muscles jolting beneath you. It makes you shift forward, clit running hard along his cock. “No, you’ll—“ he wheezes, fingers digging deep into your sides now. “You’ll… think I’m bad. Dirty.”

You lean forward, shove your tongue into his mouth with no warning. He moans, letting you push his tongue around until yours is halfway down his throat, licking and slurping every inch of him you can reach. You yank his head back by the hair, catching those watery eyes. “Tell me all your dirty thoughts,” you croon, lips trailing down his jaw. “Tell me them and maybe we’ll make them come true.”

Namjoon moans. “You,” he hesitates. While he does that, you reach down to align his cock with your hole, throbbing to be filled. His tip brushes along the tightened lips surrounding your entrance, reducing him to a stuttering mess. “You tell me I’m dirty,” he cries, “dirty and messy, and-and you make me beg for forgiveness just to cum, s-sometimes you don’t like it and make me d-do it again,” he babbles. “I-if you’re feeling mean y-you just edge me. Until I cry.”

You sink down on his cock, your shared arousal making the glide slippery and so wet. It’s almost too easy how he fits inside of you, your back arching as the head of his cock runs deliciously against your walls. The sensation of your cunt wrapped tightly around his cock has him gasping for air.

“Until you cry?” You repeat through clenched teeth. “Like you are now?”

Namjoon trembles, hips and thighs twitching every few minutes. He nods his head, but he’s become overwhelmed by his thoughts and your touches, so the movement ends up looking more dazed. There’s a couple tears that escaped and painted pretty trails down his cheeks, one catching on the corner of that pout of his. The rest pool in the corner of his eyes, glassy just like his sweat-soaked skin.

“Happy birthday,” you mumble, brushing his hair away from his face to press a kiss against his forehead. Namjoon groans. “Fuck me, baby,” you purr, wrapping your hands around his neck again. “You deserve it.”

Namjoon lets out a loud cry at your permission, hands tightening around your hips. He wastes no time, bucking into you like a wild animal that’s desperate to cum. You don’t blame him; he’d been close to cumming down your throat, and recounting his demeaning fantasies while stuffed deep inside you certainly didn’t help.

You let him jostle you to and fro, dick slipping in and out of your pussy with an unreal amount of force. He was grunting all kinds of sounds against your shoulder, biting down on the skin like it would calm him. It doesn’t, and you already know there will be a big bruise to attend to tomorrow.

With every thrust, the head of his cock rubs against that sensitive spot in your pussy, back arching at the angle he pushes in at. It makes every hair on your body stand, the animalistic sounds he’s releasing reaching deep into your core.

It’s a brief reminder of what this man was truly capable of, buff arms and thick thighs lifting you around like you’re nothing. He could so easily take you over in the bedroom, push you down and ram himself inside until you cried. But it’s the other way around, and he likes it that way.

Well, you liked it that way too, especially if it meant having this big strong man so pliant under your touch.

“Fuck,” you moan, holding the back of his head closer to where he’s seemingly set on bruising your entire shoulder. “Just like that.”

Your walls clench around his length, squeezing him so tight that it becomes difficult for him to move. A wail catches in his throat, his body beginning to burn out from the initial burst of energy he’d received when you gave him the go ahead. “I-I,” he pants, weakly and unevenly bucking into you. You know he’s close from the cute wavering of his speech, his usual eloquent speaking style reduced to a stuttering mess. You take pity on him, gearing your muscles up again to see him to completion.

It doesn’t take long. A few slow rolls of your hips later and he’s spasming beneath you, your name rolling off his tongue in a series of soft whimpers. He continues groaning even afterwards, hands falling limply to his sides as you finish yourself off.

The thing about this big strong body was that it burned out extremely fast, his head rolling back to give you a clear view of his fucked out features. He was tired, absolutely drained from your little moment, and such was exhibited on his lax frame. Your orgasm rolls around right after, stomach clenching. Despite the shock of pleasure that swallows you up, you can’t help the endeared smile that takes over your features at the sight beneath you as you cum.

“So proud of you,” you murmur afterwards, cupping his face in your hands to deliver a brigade of kisses against his skin. He groans in faux annoyance, letting you turn him this way and that as you shower him in affection. “My baby did so well today.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he huffs, though the ghost of a smile tugs at his lips. “What’s there to eat?”

You snort, pushing yourself off of him. You wiggle your panties and dress back into place, tossing him his discarded shirt as you make toward the noodles. They’ve probably gone cold by now, neglected in favor of fucking like two bunnies in heat. Still, you give them a poke. Just as you’d predicted, they’re way too cold to be edible, a fact which greatly saddens Namjoon.

You weren’t having any of that, especially not on his birthday (it was 12:49 now, but technically, it’s still his birthday until he goes to sleep), which is why you make him pack everything up right away. “I’ll heat them up at my place,” you assure him, patting his bum as he whines at the sudden relocation. He’s tugging his zip-up on, the collar tugged all the way up for him to hide the lower half of his face behind.

It doesn’t stop you from pressing a kiss over where you know his mouth is.

“Come on,” you grin, waiting for him to lock up his studio. He falls into step beside you, grudgingly throwing a hand around your shoulders. You beam up at him, leaning onto your toes to kiss his cheek. “I’ll make you cry at my place,” you promise, relishing in the dark flush that floods the apples of his cheeks.

#ksmutclub #networkbangtan #kim namjoon smut #namjoon smut #namjoon fic #rm smut #bts smut #kim namjoon fic #mine

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apocalypseornaw · 3 years

Text

Walk Away-3

After so long apart you finally agree to see Sam and tell him the truth

You groaned as you sat back against the wall hoping this newest wave of nausea would pass.. It was normal according to the obgyn Tasha had helped you get into. You had just entered into your second trimester and found out the gender of the baby at your last appointment. She was growing perfectly and doing a number on your insides in the process. You heard someone clear their throat and looked up to see Max leaned against the doorway leading into the bathroom with a cup of tea in his hand. He held it out to you with a smile “Ginger tea with honey and lemon” You thanked him as you took the cup and allowed yourself a small sip of the warm liquid.

He walked a little further into the room before sitting down next to you his long legs stretched out in front of him “Donna Hanscum called again” you nodded before saying “That doesn’t really surprise me..has Jody and the girls started their rounds again?” he let out a sharp laugh “Not yet, it holds them off when they can talk with you but I had to tell Donna you weren’t here considering you don’t want Sam to know you’re currently starting to move past smuggling a basketball into smuggling a beach ball” “He doesn’t need to know” you mumbled but Max shook his head “He loves you Y/N. I don’t know what happened but he wouldn’t be trying this hard to get you to talk to him if he didn’t”

You leaned your head back against the wall then rolled your head over to look at Max “If and it’s a big if but if I was to agree to see him and Dean could you put a glamour on me?” his eyes went to your ever growing stomach “Oh you mean to hide the bump?” you nodded and he scratched his chin in thought then nodded “I think I can manage that with Alicia’s help. I’ll call Erik too, he's better at stuff along those lines” “Thanks Max and thank Erik for me too” he stood to go call Erik who was his boyfriend of a little over three years. You’d known him for a while but had gotten to know him better over the last few weeks considering his mom was your doctor. “When are you going to call Sam?” he asked from the door so you shrugged “When Jody calls I’ll tell her it’s fine to give Dean my new number then go from there” he nodded then walked out the room.

------

Sam was sitting at the table in the kitchen nursing a cup of coffee and trying to ignore just how much the bunker itself seemed to miss your presence. How had he messed everything up this bad? How had Dean been able to see just how much pain you were in but he couldn’t? Christ he was an idiot. If he could do it over he would have never gone on that very first hunt where all of you met Lila.

She didn’t hold a candle to you. You were...hell you were a force of nature. Everyone who knew you was drawn to you. You were caring but strong, courageous but smart. You would dive in feet first to help someone you cared about and even strangers. He’d seen you go toe to toe with more than one demon just to save a life. You were a soft touch when needed but also was the first to make someone shake off any self doubt and get their fire back.

When Alex had needed help paying for college you’d found grants seemingly out of thin air. When Patience would get upset about her broken relationship with her father she’d call you. You were one of the few people Claire would take advice from without rolling her eyes.

As for the way you’d changed not only his life but Dean and Cas’ as well he didn’t have the words for. Dean never got a chance to withdraw into himself with you around because you’d be at his door slipping new cds under it or bribing him out with food and western movie marathons. Cas always seemed to brighten up when you walked into a room because you never let a day pass without reminding him just how important he was to what you called your family group.

When you’d come into Sam’s life you’d knocked him flat on his ass metaphorically speaking and literally speaking. He’d ended up catching a punch from you on accident. Dean had teased him that your right hook was what made him fall in love with you. Looking up to see a woman as beautiful as you were apologizing but calling him an idiot for getting in your way at the same time did help matters. From that day forward you were all he could think about. The day you finally moved into the bunker was the happiest day of his life.

The dreams of a so-called normal life was behind him but with you a new normal started to form in his mind. He never felt more whole than when you were in his arms. Waking up to you curled against his chest or with his arm around your waist was the most peace he’d ever felt. He loved you more than he ever dreamed possible to love someone after losing Jess. He felt like such a failure because he had apparently not shown you that. When you started to talk with Donna, Jody and the girls at least he knew you were alive,healthy and indeed staying with the Banes twins.

He knew they lived near a small town on the upper west coast but that was all he did know. He wanted nothing more than to track them down and beg for the chance to see you but for now at least knowing you were ok was the best compromise he was going to get. He sighed and looked down at his laptop. He had a few news websites up but his heart wasn’t in trying to find a case, his heart was wherever you were. He could hear Dean talking to someone in the library and thought maybe he had a case until he heard Dean say your name.

He quickly moved around the corner to see Dean pacing across the floor as he spoke on the phone. He caught a few words of what Dean was saying “Are you sure?...Yeah I promise...look you have my word...I will...ok...and sweetheart it’s good to hear from you” Was Dean talking to you? Why had you called Dean? Was something wrong? Were you hurt? He was so wrapped up in his own thoughts he hadn’t realized Dean had not only hung up but had called his name three times.

“SAM!” Dean spoke harshly and he blinked a few times glancing at the phone still in his brother’s hand “Was that Y/N?” Dean nodded “Yeah she told Jody it was ok to pass her new number on to me..She’s willing to see you but she has a few conditions” “Anything, I’ll agree to anything” Sam answered quickly his mind going into overdrive at the thought of seeing you.

Dean nodded again then said “Grab your stuff. I’ll text her and let her know we’re hitting the road. I’ve got to call Max when we get close enough and he’ll come meet us to lead us up to their place”

------

“Are you sure you can’t tell?” you asked Erik for the sixth time since he’d finished the glamour. He sighed and shook his head “I’m sure. I’ve hid entire buildings, your little baby bump isn’t even a challenge” you smiled then smoothed the shirt you were wearing self consciously.

“Alicia why did I agree to talk to Sam again?” She walked in behind you and held out a bottle of water “Because you’re still in love with him, it’s blaringly obvious no matter what happened he’s still in love with you because they’ve made the trip from Lebanon in record time. Even if today doesn’t go well at least you know you tried” you took a deep breath and nodded. She was right of course. When Erik’s phone went off you nearly jumped out of your skin but his hand on your arm kept you in place “Calm down Y/N, that was just Max. They’re coming up the driveway”

No sooner than the words came out of Erik’s mouth you heard the familiar rumble of the Impala’s engine. Any other time that was music to your ears but now it made you a little queasy. Erik shot you a smile before grabbing his jacket “Me and Max are headed into town but when you want to lower the glamour I showed Alicia how ok?” you nodded “Thanks again Erik” “Anytime”

------

You took a deep breath when you heard the boots on the porch so Alicia moved to answer the door. You weren’t in direct eyesight so you heard Dean first say “Alicia, good to see you” she greeted him then said “Hi Sam” you felt your heart flip when he said “Hey Alicia, I um thank you for being a place she could come to” “She’s always welcome wherever me and Max are and we make sure she knows it” that was one of the many things you loved about Alicia. Her words and tone of voice was friendly but the underlying venom of having comforted a hurt friend was still very much there.

“Y/N?” Alicia called out as she shut the door behind the boys as if she didn’t know for a fact you were hiding in the small hallway between the front door and kitchen. “Right here” you replied stepping around the corner. Dean smiled when he saw you “Well you’re a sight for sore eyes” you were glad when he just hugged you with one arm around your shoulders on the off chance of him brushing against your stomach.

“I see you’ve actually managed to stay alive without me which is a miracle in itself” you teased with a tense smile trying to calm your nerves before meeting Sam’s eyes. God those fucking eyes of his. You stood there for a second staring at each other before Dean turned to Alicia “You got something to drink? Alcoholic or otherwise. I’d settle for tea or coffee” she gave him a small smile before winking at you and herding him towards the kitchen.

Once the two of you were alone you both started to speak at the same time. You laughed nervously “You want to go first?” he nodded then let out a harsh breath “I’m sorry. I know that probably falls flat but I am. You are the most important person in my life. I love you with everything in me and I failed to show you that. I failed to realize how much my actions were hurting you. I made you think I wanted someone else and I pushed you away. I don’t expect you to forgive me and I don’t expect you to come back with me but I’m grateful you chose to let me come here and tell you that face to face” You should’ve known with pregnancy hormones on top of everything else that you’d end up in tears. You wiped them away before they could fall before saying “Sam..god just tell me why? Why did you act like that towards her? Was the attachment to me the only thing stopping you? The fear of all our friends taking my side? Of your brother siding with me?”

“Baby no” he breathed and took a step towards you but when you quickly crossed your arms over your chest and stepped back he froze in his tracks. “I guess it was the feeling of losing someone you love to a demon. I’ve been there before then with what happened to her husband. It got me thinking about what happened to Jess happening to you. That’s not an excuse because you told me that you wanted other hunters backing her and I didn’t listen but please baby please know I have never wanted anyone else since the day I met you”

“But you didn’t listen to me Sam. That’s why I left! That’s why I came here and got them to ward me so you couldn’t find me. I couldn’t sit around waiting for you to break my heart and I’m not coming back with you no matter how much I want nothing more than to jump into your arms right now. If you want us...If you want a second chance before I tell you something I need a promise that you’ll be ok with it taking time, with me being here and you in Lebanon. I need you to actually think about it before you answer me Sam” you were trying so hard not to cry because you knew for a fact Dean and Alicia were standing just on the other side of that kitchen door waiting to intervene if you needed them to.

“I’d do anything for a second chance for us, to prove to you just how much you mean to me” you nodded slowly then called out “Alicia can you and Dean come here?” the door swung open quickly to both of them nearly stumbling over each other. “Yeah sweetie?” she asked so you braced yourself then said “They need to know” “And you’re sure?” she questioned so you nodded “Yeah I’m sure”

“Need to know what?” Dean asked but Alicia was already repeating the words Erik had told her would drop the glamour. The moment it faded and your stomach was back visibly rounded Dean’s eyes widened and poor Sam looked like he may faint or puke. “Is that why you left?” Sam asked quietly and you shook your head “I didn’t find out until about a month after I left. That’s why I came here”

Dean recovered quicker and held a hand out “Can I?” you nodded “She is your niece after all” “Niece, so it’s a girl?” he asked with a grin. Your hand came to cover Dean’s so you could place it on the light movements but your eyes never left Sam’s as you said “Yeah I just found out last week” a light kick made Dean’s grin get bigger “Look at that. She’s strong already” “Just like her mom” Alicia replied then reached for Dean’s arm “Let’s give them another minute” Dean nodded and kissed your cheek before saying “I love you kid and I’m gonna love her too” then followed her back into the kitchen.

Sam had remained silent so you finally looked up at him “Are you going to say anything?” a slight smile slipped onto his face before he quietly said “Can I touch you now? Because I really want to hug you and feel our daughter move” you moved towards him and he pulled you against his chest without hesitation. One large hand held your back while the other rested on your stomach “I love you Y/N. I’ll prove to you that things will be different. Nothing means more to me than you and her” you smiled up at him through the tears in your eyes “I love you too Sam”

Tags: @delightfullykrispypeach @fofisstilinski @chengukargbo @rosalynshields @hunting-the-grievers @spngirl05

#spn fanfiction #supernatural fanfiction #sam winchester x female!reader #sam winchester x reader #sam winchester fanfiction

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