#ship: sun showers and summer storms | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rcksmith · 3 years

Text

Dream a little of me — Kaz Brekker

Resume: One bed and two hearts.

Requests :”Hello, darling! Could I request sleeping with kaz? Imagine or general headcanons, as you like. No nsfw (no need of touching tho, do what you like with it!), just sleeping in the same bed - maybe for the first time. Also bonus points if one of them will have a nightmare👀Have a good night/day, hun!🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️✨✨✨💗💗💗”

“My heart asks for all the angst of touch starved reader falling for Kaz Brekker... 😭😭😭 - 🐕‍🦺”

Couple: Kaz Brekker/ Grisha Fem!Reader

Warnings: swearing, mention of post-traumatic stress, angst, fluff.

Word count: 3k.

A/N: Thank you💖 I hope you guys like.

Normal Rules.

English is not my first language, so I so sorry if have a mistake. Requests are open. Love you❤️

— — — — —

The rain was pouring down in torrents, in a fierce storm that roared into the shadowy forest like a hideous, unearthly animal. Platinum lightning’s streaked the midnight sky and thunder rumbled like as giants footsteps crashing into the ground and shaking the earth. Everything had been orchestrated to work. But nothing could have gone more wrong.

Unfortunately, not even Kaz Brekker's millions of tricks and plans could defeat the force of nature. And even you, an Infernal Entherealki, hadn't mastered the art of controlling fire or keeping warm while under a torrent of icy, biting cold water.

Your teeth started chattering, your lips turned purple, and you wondered if you could run another inch. Your muscles felt like stones and for someone who had lived with the heat of the flames his whole life, being under freezing water was extremely painful. But Kaz wouldn't let you stop. And you, as excruciating as the pain was, didn't want to stop either. The pain was strong but the desire not to let him down was more.

The two of you part of the plan that night was to go through the forest with the diamonds in pockets and find the rest of the Crows on the other side. You two would have to spend the night in that place. But all of Brekker's machinations were washed away by the treacherous and atrocious rain.

The only alternative was to run. Run to the direction where there was a small civilization and pray to find an inn or not die of hypothermia.

The angry drops of icy water were enough to steal Kaz's breath. Not because the cold was unbearable, but because his own demons, his past, were ghosts that gripped his ankles like monsters from horror stories. He didn't feel the rain, didn't feel the biting wind, Kaz just felt the sensation of the freezing, oppressive ocean drowning him. And for a second, when he looked at the small strip of fur on he wrist that wasn't hidden by his glove and coat, he swore he saw Jordie's dead skin in place of his.

He had to get out of there. But when the storm started, and Kaz run his eyes at you, your face wet from the rain, your skin constantly whipped by the cold droplets, and your cheeks extremely red from the cold, it made him gasp in a very different way. Blood pooled in your cheeks. Pulsing. Alive. He had to get you out of there.

Finding hiding places was one of his specialties, and he focused his mind entirely on it. When an inn came into view, a small relief rumbled in both of you. And Kaz looked in your direction to make sure you were okay. Alive.

As the receptionist gave the key from the last spare room to the two of you, Kaz couldn't help but feel that there was no longer any heat pulsing in your body. That made him feel miserable.

The night was cold. Unusually cool for the time of year.

"I don't think it's a good idea to carry out a robbery like that in these climatic temperatures." Inej said, walking down the stairs after Kaz "One of the Dregs caught a serious cold too while you were away."

Kaz had to be away for two days to sort out some matters of his own. Check some ship ports and finding out the weaknesses of some new merchants. And as much as he ordered his thoughts to focus solely on that purpose, he found himself daydreaming at certain times about…

"It got very serious after a few hours." Inej completed.

Kaz felt a trickle of worry trace his veins, tighten his throat But it wasn't for some bruteman of his Dregs. His source of concern was more serious, deeper, and for someone he didn't want to think about too much. Even though he told himself to keep every nerve in his body under control, in the end he was Kaz Brekker, he couldn't help but notice he picked up his pace to get faster to the live room that was strictly reserved for the Crows.

And when he walked in, following by Inej, the tree branches hit the windows, blown by the wind, tinkling. The cold was oppressive and biting, but not enough to stop Jesper from playing cards with Wylan, nor enough for Nina not to eat her candy and listen to Matthias tell of his people's legends. But the eyes of Kaz, that treacherous and treacherous organ, ran to you first. Magnetically, inevitably.

And he felt like he could breathe again.

The sight of you sitting on the black velvet sofa, with a book in your hands and your legs stretched out on the padded stool in front of you, calmed Kaz's heartbeat as nothing had ever done.

As much as he denies, in those two days his mind has swarmed over you more often than he thought wise. Brekker liked to justify that action with the fact that you were part of the gang. As close and important as Jesper or Inej. It was normal for him to be worried about the Dregs.

But why did he only see you? Why did the questions about your well-being and comfort stood out so much from any other concerns with others?

It was you. Always late at night, when Brekker was a sigh away from sleep. You were what someone he was thinking.

"Who is alive always appears." Nina announced he arrival and Kaz was pulled out of his reverie.

"Did you kill anyone these two days?" Jesper placed a letter on the table and Inej sat beside Nina.

Kaz left his hat on one of the dark marble tables. “Does it matter?"

There were other seats available in the room. A leather armchair next to the burning fireplace - Brekker were sure that you was controlling the temperature - an extra chair around the table where Jesper and Wylan were play, and a small divan beside Matthias. But Kaz sat beside you on the couch.

You marked the page with your finger, lowering the book gently. He didn't need to see the cover to know what it was. It was a romance clichéd eighteenth-century. He had given it to you before he left.

"Everything worked?" You smiled and Kaz had the feeling that he wanted to memorize that smile in a painting to always appreciate it.

"And doesn't always do?"

Even with the biting cold that wasn't stopped by the fireplace, Brekker could feel the heat from your body emanating, like a delicious temptation. You were always so hot. Bathed in the sun's rays. He didn't know if infernal grisha like you gave off so much heat too, because it was impossible for that to be human. Were so intense...delicious. Even with multiple layers of clothing, if Kaz approached you he could feel the warmth of a tropical pirate island.

Was that why he always unconsciously sat beside you? Why did you radiate so much causticity that it made Kaz forget about the ocean's cold? Why were you like a piece of life and Kaz felt dead for a long time?

Or was it because, heat or not, you were the only thing worth being around?

All the questions were too disturbing. And Kaz Brekker didn't want to know the answer.

Now, even climbing the stairs to the room beside you, Kaz couldn't feel anything radiating from you body. Just the cold. And he hated it with every force of his being.

You're not made to take the rain, felling deadly cold, or turn your lips a bluish hue.You were not made to be cold as a corpse, with muscles stiff and sore like a dead. You were not made to look like Jordie. You were meant to be alive. To look alive. Exhale the heat of the most ardent fire and heat a room just with your presence. You were meant to scare off Kaz's winter with your summer.

For a second, Kaz wanted to hug you to give you the warmth of his own body.

You felt exhausted. The remnants of what you once day were. Every inch of your body protested, aching and tearing at muscles. The cold, sharp water did you no good. You didn't know if it was were something of your species or a trait unique to you. But it didn't do any good to you. You hated looking so miserable in that appearance, especially in front of the one man you always wanted to look beautiful to. But at that moment you were in too much pain to worry so much about it.

As soon as Kaz had put the key in the doorknob, his gloved fingers stiff from the cold, what you expected to find was a cozy room, promising a heat shower and a good, well-deserved night's sleep. But that wasn't it. You stared at the wide double bed with white sheets, perplexed. Shock competed with your pain and put your brain to work, and all your breath lurked in throat as your realized the situation.

Oh my fucking God.

You didn't have to look at Kaz to feel his entire body be rigid, in a way far more potent than the effects the rain had caused. As if the prospect of sleeping next to you was more whorse than dying of hypothermia.

You closed your expression. Half because your mood was already bad and half because the rejection was brutal. You didn't expect your passionate feelings for Kaz to be returned, nor did you expect him to feel the same longing to be close to you as you felt for him. But no woman wanted to see that a man would rather die of hypothermia than share a bed with her. Even more if he was a man she was in love with.

You entered in room first, the pain in your body clouding your thoughts.

"Do you mind if I shower first?"

Your voice was weak, and you didn't have the heart to look at Kaz. He hissed a “no” that hung in the air, and that was the last thing you heard before closing yourself in the bathroom.

His heart was beating eerily fast in his chest. As loud as the thunder outside and as unsettling as the chill of rain. His breath began to burn heavily in his throat, and suddenly his entire body was fully aware of the situation.

One bed.

Even when he took the diamonds out of his pocket and placed them on a small table, even when you came out of the bathroom and he walked in, even as he basked in the hot water, his heart still pounded wildly. Like a generator.

Kaz Brekker liked puzzles, challenges. Of things he could unravel and understand. Piece by piece. He played to win and to cheat, and the world knelt at his feet before the insight of his mind. Still, he didn't know what to do. You were like a fascinating and maddening riddle. The one thing that, no matter how hard Kaz tried, could never unravel yours mysteries. Or maybe, just, what he would never be able to do was unravel what he felling whenever he was by your side.

His heartbeat grew stronger.

Brekker remembered every deck of cards, every card played. He could keep up with the distribution of up to five decks, unlock any lock, and devise the most insane plans. But he couldn't stop the way his soul trembled whenever he laid eyes on you.

In those moments, when you looked at Kaz like he was someone much better than he actually was, Kaz wanted to be good. He wanted to be born again to become a damn decent man. For you. He wished he didn't have his demons and erase his past. Because that way, when the sun's rays hit your face and you were close enough for your scent of happiness to flood his senses, Kaz wouldn't back down. He would lean down and seal his lips in yours with the promise of a glorious future.

His heart beat faster.

Why did he feel that his whole life was always suspended whenever he were away from you? And why did he have the feeling his life could change forever if he walked out that door?

Kaz turned off the shower. The heart running like a horse. He fished out the towel and wrapped it around his waist, finding a small hamper that held neat, folded pajamas for guests. He was surprised he didn't notice you in those pajamas. You made him lose focus.

As soon as he dressed and walked out of the bathroom, his eyes immediately went to your figure. Sitting on the bed, your legs under the covers, your hands clasped together in a cupped shape with a small, flare of fire burning in the center.

You looked up at Kaz. “I managed to do something to warm you up.”

The phrase was: No for warm me up. No for warm us up. For warm you up.

Kaz lost his breath and his soul trembled. The air felt different since he stepped out of the shower, not just from the recent gust of heat. But there was something else, something lyrical, pink and lush. Something...beautiful. He did not say anything. First because he didn't trust his own words and second because he didn't know what to say. He sat beside you, a considerable distance away, but this time his fear was that you would hear the loud, racing beat of his heart.

You turned gently towards him, reaching out your hands towards him, not noticing how his hands trembled as they stretched under the hot flame. Kaz swallowed hard.

He knew how weak and drained you were, but he also knew you were aware that he loathed cold. Hated icy water. You didn't know the depth of his traumas, but the fact that you cared to the point that you were willing to use your last shred of strength to end his torment was something that reverberated in his soul.

You two didn't say anything else after that. After Kaz removed his hands from the flame, you understood that as the end of your two interactions. You two shared a mutual answer that neither would sleep on the floor. You two were adults and in no condition to be lashed by any colder.

The night moon bathed the dark room with lights in distilled silver, almost flickering through the windswept tree branches. You were back-to-back, blankets pulled up to your shoulders, breathing gently quickened. As exhausted as you two were, neither of you could sleep.

Suddenly, the whole atmosphere in room seemed to change. Like a private, enchanted piece of the world. The wind howled softly, on a calm note. The rain was still falling in torrents, but now it seemed to be adopted in a passionate tone. As if it had fulfilled its purpose and now hovered in the world with a romantic veil of water. Stars shining bright above the bedroom window, glittering like hundreds of tiny diamonds, accompanied by moonlight. Although the light was dim, it seemed to capture the lyrical essence, seem to whisper “Dream a little dream of me.”

Everything felt different, like the two of you had entered a rift in the world. A part inhabited romance, pure magic, love.

Your soul shivered, and as much as you could never prove it, you felt that Kaz's soul shivered too. Your breath hitched, burning in lungs, your body seized by a caustic tingle that snaked through every inch.

You didn't know why, but your body shifted gently on the bed, turning slightly towards the ceiling. The racing pulse in your veins. A second felt like an eternity. Kaz's body moved too, and you knew, just knew, that he was looking at the ceiling too.

Two hearts beating in the same time. Synchronized. And, by some magic or deity, you two knew that your heartbeat would never again beat another way. Always connected.

Your body moved a little more, now on belly up. And Kaz's seemed to do the same move, even without seeing you or your movements. His chest rising and falling with intensity. The rain calmed outside, turning the symphony of droplets hitting the roof into mysterious, passionate music. As if the world were plotting a whispering favor for you two.

Kaz could feel your body heat radiating once more, grazing his skin with rays of sunlight. Everything in that bedroom became poignant and intense and lyrical, inflicting sensations on him that Kaz never thought existed before. Later, it would be a shock for him to see that he was at the mercy of his own passions. Overcome by sensations that robbed him of control of his body. Later he would think about it. Later.

His soul tingled, sending gusts of heat from the inside out. The feeling was that, after 28 years of deep sleep, he had awakened. Awake. Alive.

His body moved once more, now completely on belly up. Kaz didn't have to look at you to know that you too had placed yourself in the same position. It was as if he felt the movements of your soul. His pulse was racing now, hot and boiling in his blood. And Kaz wondered if all the money in the world would bring half the sensations he was feeling right now.

What was he so afraid all this time? That question echoed through all the corridors of his soul. And Brekker feared for the answer. What kept him from having everything he craved?

Money? Pekka? Jordie's ghost and the cold ocean? Kaz feared never touching you any more than he feared his demons? Was that why he always walked away from you? Why was wanting to slide his fingers into your hot skin and not being able to fell you, be worse than any sensation he'd ever felt? Because, maybe, admitting it can change everything?

His breath hitched.

Would it be worse to be alone for the rest of his life? Doomed and cursing to a fate of revenge, death and red hate? Or, even worse for his heart, finding a girl with lovely eyes, sunny smiles and the smell of happiness? A girl that made him laugh, come out of his hiding. You. What do he will do with that? What if you open up the door that he can't close it? And If when you hold he and his heart is set in motion?

Would that be so bad? No.

His body became very aware of the approximation it was on to your. Your heat radiating into his. For some reason, Kaz was sure you was in the same condition as he was. Sharing the same feelings. The same passion hidden for so long.

Kaz should have thought of his brother, of revenge against Pekka Rollins, of the cold of the ocean. He should have weighed of his own traumas. Instead, he thought: What if I get a little closer?

The result of this was his fingertips brushing yours. And he knew the exact moment your heart sped up even more. Because his followed the same beat. Maybe following yours for the rest of his life.

You brought your eyes to him, calmly, as if that moment might disintegrate. and the world seemed suspended in that moment. Kaz slid his eyes to you as well, sharing sensations and emotions that didn't need to be put into words. It was all there, in the gaze.

His fingers crept higher, going to your hand, and plunging his touch - and his soul - into that contact. All your heat was too strong. Too intense. Doing Kaz wouldn't be able to think or feel, for the first few minutes, about anything but light, heat, summer and…happiness.

That's when you gave him a shaky, emotional smile. I would do anything for you. That's what that smile said. And Kaz answered, his hand tight with yours before letting go. Me too.

- -

As the sun's rays, shy and buttery, flooded the bedroom in soft color, Kaz's eyelids fluttered. The sound of birds reached his ears, and the scent of flowers and happiness invaded his nose.

It was nothing like waking up in Ketterdam.

That thought back him to reality. A reality in which he had stolen many diamonds, taken the rain and had to share the calm. A reality where Kaz Brekker touched you.

You.

Kaz opened his eyes immediately, his heart racing again. He looked frantically around the room, past the simple furniture, the closed bathroom door, the window where the light came in, and then looked to his side on the bed. That's when he realized what position he was in.

His soul heated up.

You had your back to him, your hair spread out on the white pillow, your back showing by your pajama top, your shoulder rising and falling softly with your resonant breathing. You were close. Very close. And Kaz finds, perplexed, that he is facing you. One arm rests around your waist, over the thick blankets, in an intimate and…romantic gesture.

He lost his breath. His warm, hope-shining soul whispered to him: what if it was like this every day? What if he woke up with you by his side forever? What if in time he learned to be a decent man? Trying to be normal?

Would Kaz do this for you?

You shifted in bed, turning onto his side, front for him, snuggling deeper under his touch and moving closer, as if Kaz were your oasis in the desert. No skin was actually touching, your breath hit his warm chest, and if Kaz lowered his lips even further, he could feel your lips on his.

Yes. He would.

705 notes · View notes

savethelastdan · 4 years

Note

When you come back down - Nickel creek Sesskagu

Kagura returns five years later.

There’s a healthy heart beating in her chest, this time. The scar on her back has faded enough that when the summer sun tans her skin, it nearly disappears. She even remembers (though she pretends not to in Jaken’s presence for a week, which is easily the worst prank that Sesshomaru has unwillingly been a part of).

She laughs, smiles, curls into his embrace at night. It’s supposed to be easy, now.

But it wasn’t love that she yearned for the most back then.

Kagura stops dead at the top of the hill, her eyes trained on the sky. Despite Jaken’s screeching at her to hurry up, one arm stretches as though her fingertips will stain blue if she only reaches high enough.

Sesshomaru watches from the corner of his eye, an uncomfortable twisting in his gut.

Kagura’s lips part for just a moment; then her arm falls, as she comes back to herself. Rolling her eyes at Jaken leads to one of their regular arguments, and it is as though everything is normal.

But the longing in her eyes, reflecting the sun, is impossible for him not to think about.

That night, Sesshomaru takes her to a spot where the mountain peaks rip holes in the nighttime mist, and says, “If you seek to leave, I have no intentions to stop you.”

She scoffs, digging her nails into the bend of each knee. “Geez, you’re always so morose...”

“There is much of the world you haven’t seen--”

“I know,” she snaps, pulling her fan free as though expecting a fight.

He pushes down his annoyance and rushes through the next words. “You are free to explore it as you wish, so long as you return to me in the end.”

Kagura’s shoulders drop in surprise. Then she scoffs again, but her tone has softened considerably. “What if I go very far? Would you wait that long?”

He thinks of every argument they’ve had recently--how her first instinct is always to fly off in the sky with no destination in mind; the day she first resurrected, when she practically tackled him out of the clouds; the day that she perished, and her smile faded into a cloud of feathers and smoke.

“There is plenty to do, in the time I will have.”

The edge of her fan slides against his cheekbone. She uses it to pull him closer, eyes bright in the dark.

Sometimes it’s a few days. Sometimes weeks. Less often, she is gone for months at a time.

Sesshomaru can only guess what she is doing--chasing storms is Kohaku’s guess, terrorizing villages across the world is Jaken’s, and Rin gives the wind witch quite a bit of credit by suggesting that Kagura’s making new friends on her travels.

It is likely she would explain, if he asked. But when Sesshomaru wakes to find her beside him once again, red-cheeked and smiling like she’s never suffered a day in her life, then he finds there are too many other ways to pass the time.

Especially since the longing (that ghost from the old days, her old life) has disappeared from her eyes.

One day she sits herself in his lap, showering them both with petals from the flowers that Rin happily threaded through her hair, and says, “You should come with me next time.”

He checks to make sure that Rin, Kohaku, and Jaken are occupied before he responds. “Do you not enjoy having time to yourself?”

“Oh, sure. It’s lovely not to have to hear that annoying little kappa whine all day, or watch those two dance around their feelings for each other. However...” She smirks, brushing flower petals from his shoulders. “I imagine it’s been several hundred years since you had a real vacation.”

He rolls his eyes, but as time goes by it gets harder and harder to deny her. “I suppose you don’t have a destination in mind.”

“Of course not.” Kagura winks. “That’s part of the fun.”

They return with a pair of orphaned twins in tow. Kagura blames the whole thing on him, since she never picked up such things on a trip of her own. Sesshomaru refuses to either defend or deny, and thus they never agree on whose fault it really is.

After that, her travels are still frequent but much shorter in nature. It doesn’t hurt the way it might have, once. Because every time she breaks through the clouds, he’s there waiting, the way he always has been.

send me song lyrics in the ask box + a ship and I’ll use them to write a short one-shot

#sesskagu #song lyric game #inuyasha #kagura of the wind #kagura #sesshomaru #savethelastdan

56 notes · View notes

staticscreenwriting · 4 years

Text

California Summer - B.H. Smut [one]

Synopsis: Kings Cove California is Billy Hargrove’s hometown. It’s also a popular summer vacation destination for rich couples and their spoiled kids. (Y/N) is one of those rich girls. Proper, sweet, innocent. Only that all bores her to death and Billy is just the adventure she’s been looking for. It’s all fun and games. A summer fling. Not strings attached. Right?

Inspired by the songs “dreaming of you” and “Kiss it off me” by Cigarettes After Sex.

A/N: This is smut, babes. Filthy. I will sit in the shame cube after I post it. Please if that is not fore you, don’t read it. Also do not interact if you’re under 18, that’s just not cool. Kay, thanks ♥

Might fuck around and make this a series.

[additional note: I am German. Sometimes I get the tense wrong or make mistakes. I am useless when it comes to punctuation. Go easy on me, please.]

There’s something about California summers, Billy thinks, thank makes them special. They’re hot and sticky and messy but they’re also exciting and exhilarating. The world seems to be dusted in a perpetual golden glow and days seem endless and full of possibility.

Maybe that sentiment is what brings all the tourists to the little coastal town of Kings Cove, California. A town caught between the undeniable charm of an old sleepy coastal town and the ever-expanding demand for tourist-friendly beach houses in gated communities where rich people can relish in the charm the town brings and then piss off once their vacation days are over.

Billy was born here, raised here until he was 17 and shipped off to forge his path in shitville Indiana. He was miserable then, but a shadow of himself. Angry and sad and overwhelmed by emotions he never learned to properly deal with. Singers and artists always seem to find something poetic about being young and angry and lost. Truth is: there’s nothing poetic about it, nothing romantic or desirable. It’s hard and it kills you slowly. Starting with your heart and then taking over every part of you, slowly but surely.

Soon as he turned 18 and was handed his High School diploma, Billy packed all his belongings into the Camaro and was off. The drive back to California, back home, it felt cleansing. Like a rebirth. A return to life at his own terms.

He got out. He survived. This, Billy is sure, he would always pride himself with no matter how trivial it may seem to anyone else. He got out. Not completely whole. Severely bruised. He got out with a heart so scared he’s sceptical it will ever fully heal. But he got out.

Though coming home didn’t come without its hardships and obstacles. There was nothing waiting for him here but a bunch of questions and an uncertain future. Finding a job, a place to stay, a point from which to start — it was hard. It still is hard. But he’s trying his best.

Kings Cove has a handful of restaurants, some convenience stores, a gym, a few bars, a drive-in, a normal cinema and a bowling alley. It’s really nothing spectacular and yet it seems there’s more and more tourist making it their temporary home in the months between May and September. It started about 5 years ago, that the town started changing with the increase in tourism. They bulldozed the playground Billy always played at, the one closest to the beach and built a bunch of fancy-ass houses and condos and a fucking Starbucks. It pains him to see it. To watch the town he loves so much, the one that holds so much charm, turn into a sandbox for rich people to shape and turn and make it something it isn’t. Something empty and lifeless.

The good thing about those tourists though, is that they are really really rich. Absolutely filthy rich. The kind of rich where they don’t know what to do with their money so you can charge them insane prices for ordinary things.

And that’s what the locals have started doing. A scoop of ice cream used to be 30ct, now it’s a dollar. You gotta bend with the world. You gotta adapt. Surviving means changing even if it sucks ass.

When he first arrived back, Billy had no idea how to navigate this place with all its changes. He felt so god damn out of place in his own home. That’s until he reconnected with Johnny, an old friend from middle school. A kid who grew up in a home filled with anger and sadness just as Billy did. Someone who understood. Someone who understands.

Johnny had it all figured out, adapted and changed. Got Billy a job at the maintenance business he works at. Fixing rain gutters and mowing lawns and cleaning driftwood off the sections of private beach belonging to the beach houses. It’s not the greatest job in the world but it’s alright and it pays good money and sometimes Billy even gets to hang out at the houses when the rich people are out taking surf lessons or doing a wine tasting a town over or try their luck on a god damn banana boat.

Kings Cove is small and the locals know each other. They’re a community tightly bonded through their shared disdain for the change their beloved town went through and the knowledge that though they can’t change anything, they can at least make the vacationers pay big money for everything.

It’s his second summer now and most of the families whose houses he tends to he’s already familiar with. You don’t forget the people who tip you 50 bucks each time. On Mondays, Billy cares for the Millers’ backyard. On Wednesday he makes sure the Callaghans’ pool is clean and still stinks of way too much chlorine. On Thursdays, it’s the Franklins’ estate that needs tending to. And weekends? Those are off.

Weekends mean he gets to enjoy the California summer himself. He goes out to the beach just after sunrise, to catch a few waves or just hang out in the ocean and let it wash away the stress resting on his shoulders from a whole week of hard work. Later, much later, when the sun is about to set, the real fun begins. There’s a bonfire almost every week. No one is ever quite sure who starts it and no official invitations are ever spoken though everyone knows and sure enough, every Saturday a crowd of young people gather by the driftwood pile and hang out and drink and dance as the bonfire crackles on.

It’s not just locals either. There’s always a few stray tourists there. Billy isn’t really all that interested in getting to know them. This is just a blip on their radar. A temporary adventure. But to him this place is home and he’s so fucking tired of these rich kids coming around and acting like they own the place. He’s the first to admit though, that the girls are quite hot and he doesn’t mind a little fling here and there without the fear of having them want anything permanent, knowing their time together comes with an expiry date. They can be quite fun and they’re so willing to let themselves fall into an intimate adventure with a local.

There’s no chase, no effort from him. The only annoying thing is they usually don’t grasp the idea of a summer fling and get clingy to the point where it becomes frustrating.

It’s a bonfire like any other, when his eyes drift across the beach, filled with people mingling all clutching a bottle or a cup. Nothing feels different or spectacular or special. But maybe that’s the thing about special moments — we don’t realise they’re special until we look at them in retrospect. And then they mean everything.

His eyes meet hers across the way. There are no fireworks. His heart beats at a normal rate. Whatever the movies and the songs try to sell you, that’s not how it really happens. Your world won’t shift and there will be no hummingbirds going wild in your stomach. It’s just a glance, a flicker. A moment that seems to hold no significance at all.

Billy can tell she’s not from here. Her outfit says it all. She’s wearing a long flowy skirt and a white tank top and some denim jacket over it that looks like it probably belongs to some boy with a trust fund and a name like Kyle or Charles. In her hair, there’s a clip with a fake flower on it. She looks expensive and fancy and like a piece of work that he’s not willing to put any effort in. He bets the guy beside her, the one that keeps playing with her hair. The one in the polo shirt. That’s probably her boy. His dad owns a boat for sure and probably fucks his secretary.

And even though he pulls his eyes away, he can feel his thoughts drift back towards her. As if some magnetic force tries to keep his mind there, with her. On the way she smiles, or how the wind blows through her hair and makes them looks messy and disorderly and — hot. On how he wants to be the one making a mess of her. He wonders what she feels like, tastes like, sounds like. Even Billy can’t deny he wants her. She’s just his type though something tells him she’s different from his other flings. There’s something deeper in her eyes. A secret he wants to unravel. It’s hidden there and it’s screaming out to him and only him.

As he turns back towards her, he sees her looks straight back at him. With those eyes full of secrets and that smirk on her lips.

Maybe his heart does beat a little faster then. Though he’ll never admit it.

That night he goes to bed and dreams of her and the beach and California.

California summers come with heat but they also come with thunderous storms. Mighty and unforgiving and rough.

Billy makes his way down the roads of Kings Cove, windshield wipers just about dealing with the heavy rainfall as it drums down onto his car window.

“ It’s the wrath of all women scorned and mistreated “ his mother used to say when he was younger and a storm washed over them. He always thought that was silly. Women aren’t thunderstorms, they’re April showers. They’re sunshine on your skin. They’re dewdrops on the lawn.

It’s so dull and gloomy he almost doesn’t see her. Only the peach coloured baseball cap makes her stand out against the grey. She’s slowly walking along the side of the road, unbothered by the downpour. Casual and relaxed as if she’s not getting soaked right this moment. There’s a Slurpee in her hand, blue raspberry.

He wants to drive past and no let himself be bothered with it. This, she, it’s not a mess he needs to get involved in. This can only end in a disaster. Rich boys don’t like you picking up their girlfriends. Rich boys also don’t like you lusting after their girlfriends. And rich boys who see you as a threat can get your ass fired real fucking quick.

And yet he pulls up to the curb and rolls down the window. “ Do you need a ride? “.

She smiles at him, the same way she did that night at the beach in the glow of the bonfire. Her lips are cherry red and for a second he wonders what they taste like. It’s like a primal desire, to taste her. To have her. God, he’s such a guy.

“ Need? No. I’d like one though.”

It’s the first time he hears her voice. It sounds so proper, so innocent. And yet there’s an edge to it. She’s all riddles and mysteries and things he wants to unpack and unravel. Something tells him all the red and the ribbons are only the outermost layer of who she really is. And wouldn’t he like to see more of her?!

“ Get in then,” he instructs with the nudge of his head. A gust of wind follows her as she opens the door and slides into the car. She smells of sunscreen and salt and artificial raspberry flavour. She smells like summer.

“ I’m Billy. “

“ I know. “

That catches him off guard. Sure he knows the locals and some of the kids whose parents he works for but that’s about it. He’s not nearly as prolific as he used to be in Hawkins. He’s a bit more mellow now if he can say so himself.

“ And you are?”

“ (Y/N). (Y/N) (Y/L/N). You tend to our beach house on Tuesdays. I saw you clean our pool the other day”.

That’s news to him. The fact that the (Y/L/N)s have a daughter. He thought it was only her parents alone in that big house in some attempt to rekindle the fire of their marriage. Last year it was only them two, he could swear.

“ Is that so? I could’ve sworn it was just your parents in that house. “

“ Was just them last year, I was in New York City last summer. This time they decided to bring me. Let me enjoy the California sun. “

“ So you enjoying it? “

“ Verdict is still out but I quite like the view yeah. “

The teasing edge in her voice does not get lost on him. If Billy Hargrove is good at one thing, it’s realising when a girl is flirting with him.

“ You watching me then? What does your little boyfriend think about that, huh?”

“ Boyfriend? “ she sounds almost offended at those words, spits it with a certain malice that takes Billy by surprise. “ You mean Dawson? “

Dawson. Of course, that’s his name. Fucking Dawson. Dawson with the swoopy hair and the polo shirt. Dawson with the trust fund. Dawson with the DUI and the state attorney dad. Dawson with the scholarship.

“ Dunno his name.”

“ He’s not my boyfriend. He’s a friend that’s a boy that thinks if he waves around his money I’ll spread my legs for him. As if I don’t have my own money. It’s so unsexy it makes my pussy dry as the Serengeti.”

Billy has to stop himself from pushing the brakes too hard. It’s not something he has expected her to say. Not this outright at least. Something about her brashness and her honesty is truly charming though. It’s endearing for sure.

“ Wearing his jacket though, poor guy thinks he’ll score soon enough.”

“ Eh. Maybe I’ll let him. I’m getting a bit bored. If nothing better comes along— “ she says it casually and shrugs her shoulders but Billy swears there’s an open end to that sentence. Almost like an invitation.

“ Hope pretty boy does it for you then. So — where to? “

She faces him, peach baseball cap on her head and cherry smile on her lips. “ See, the thing is that my parents aren’t home right now and I don’t have a key so … “

“ So...? “

“ Just wanna hang somewhere until they get home tonight. Maybe somewhere dry? “

Everything in him screams at him not to do it. Not to get tangled up in this. He knows, god he knows, this is a bad idea and yet he says it anyway.

“ Do you wanna chill at my place? “

She bites her lips then takes another sip from her Slurpee. “ Yeah, sounds good to me.”

God Billy, you are such a dumbass.

Billy’s apartment is small but he feels more at home here than he ever did in any house he shared with his father.

There’s an open kitchen/living room area, a bathroom and his bedroom. It’s not much but it’s his and that makes all the difference.

“ Well uh — this is my place. “

He almost expects to see some kind of disdain on her face, disappointment too maybe. She’s used to big fancy houses with white shutters and stucco ceilings. Though when he turns to look at her there’s none of it. Just curiosity. No judgment. Not even a tiny spark. Not even at all.

“ It’s nice. Do you uh — I’m soaked. Do you have a shirt or something you could give me?”

It’s now, that he lets his eyes travel down her body, and notices her shirt clinging to her body. She’s not wearing a bra and it’s painfully obvious and he swears he dies in that moment. There’s only so much a guy’s heart can take.

“ Uh. I — mmh.”

As if his body works on autopilot, Billy hurries towards his bedroom and rummages through his closet until he finds a shirt that’s even baggy on him and will surely work for her. God, seeing her in his clothes is gonna give him another little heart attack.

“ Here you g — “ she’s naked. Not completely but her shirt and jeans are gone and all she’s in is a pair of red underwear and no bra and some socks and that damn peach baseball hat.

“ Huh? you never seen a pair of tits before? “

“ No, I have. “

“ Good. “

“ Yeah. Here “

She smirks as Billy hands her the shirt, doesn’t break eye contact. Not even once and she slips if over her head and almost drowns in the fabric. It reaches down to mid-thigh and she looks glorious. Wet hair clinging to her skin, shirt covering everything but just barely. Bily is usually suave and charming and smooth. Why not now? Why not with her? What is it about this girl that she plays his games better than he does it himself.

“ You want something to eat? “

What the fuck, Billy. There’s a half-naked girl in your kitchen and you’re asking her if she wants food? What is going on?!

“ Sure, what’ve you got? “

“ Lemme see — “ Billy says and turns towards the kitchen cabinets and (Y/N) slides up and sits down on the island. Her ass must be flush on the counter and Billy has to stop himself from following that thought any further because that would result in a serious hard-on right now.

“ So I got some Nachos aaand — “ he says and squats down to open a lower cabinet, “ I think there’s guacamole somewh— “

A soft thump interrupts him and, as he realises what’s caused the sound, his heart drops straight down into his pants and his whole body goes hot. Like his entire system is going haywire.

His hand reaches out to take the flimsy red fabric into his hand. Her underwear. This has crossed flirting long ago. This is an obvious invitation and if this was any other girl or any other situation he’d already be balls deep inside her so why not now?

As Billy turns to look at her, the teasing smirk is back, her eyebrow is raised in a way that tells him she’s challenging his next move, and the secrets are back sparkling in her eyes.

“ Oops “ she says though he can tell she’s all but sorry.

“ What are you doing? You have a boyfriend. “

“ Uuuugh ” (Y/N) moans in annoyance, “ I told you, he’s not my boyfriend. He’s just a boy who doesn’t get it. I have a lot of boys in a lot of cities who all do not get it. They think because they’re rich and their parents have influence, everyone has to do as they wish. They’re not used to not getting what they want and I like to see ‘em get pissy once they realise they can’t have me. Billy those guys — they are so boring. So dull and if I have to listen to one more lecture about politics or their scholarship or how their daddy helped finance the university’s library I am going to off myself. “

“ So what role do I play in this game? You’re just a rich girl who’s bored with her suitors then, huh? What am I ? “

“ Exciting. You are different. You are you, no ifs or buts. You are your own person not a clone of your wealthy father and his even wealthier father. You are exciting and so. fucking. hot. “

Billy doesn’t notice it happening but suddenly he’s so close he can feel her breath on his skin. She’ so close. So close. All he has to do is reach out and grab her. Touch her. Kiss her. Taste her.

“ Fuck me.”

“ You sure? “ he murmurs, voice low and deep and soothing. “That’s all this is gonna be. Sex and fun and nothing serious. “

“ Just fun. No strings. I’ll leave at the end of the summer anyway. Until then we can — explore. “

“ Explore? “

“ Mmh. There’s so much we can do.“

“ Sounds good to me. “

Billy doesn’t give her time to reply before his lips descend on hers. She doesn’t taste like cherries or chapstick or sugar. She tastes cold and like fake raspberry slushy. Billy thinks it’s his favourite flavour now.

His hands wander up and down her sides and hers get tangled in his curls, combing through his hair and tugging slightly. She’s breathing deep, quick breaths as his lips make their way across her neck and down towards her boobs. He bunches the shirt up and pulls it over her head leaving her naked on his kitchen counter. She’s absolutely fucking breathtaking and his jeans are getting awfully tight around the front.

“ You’re so hot “ he murmurs against her skin as he buries his head in the crook of her neck. Her skin is flushed and there’s a cute red tint to her cheeks. Maybe he was wrong about it on all accounts. Maybe she’s not as innocent as he has first thought.

Her fingers slip down his body and straight into the front of his jeans, grabbing his dick and squeezing his hard on softly. Yeah, she’s definitely not as innocent as he had first thought.

It’s a clash of teeth and a tongues and a lot of saliva. This is messy and raw and rough and he feels like he’s died and gone straight to heaven. With every second, his lips wander a little further down her hot skin, placing kisses one every inch he can reach until he’s kneeling in front of her. Her eyes lock on his as she spreads her legs further letting him see just what he’s been lusting after since the first moment he’s laid eyes on her. He feels like a man starving being presented with an all you can eat buffet.

Their eyes lock as his lips kiss the spot where her abdomen meet her thighs. It’s not where she wants him but it’s enough to make her go fuzzy in the head.

“ I’ll make you forget about all those rich fuckboys, baby.”

And he does. God, he does. As soon as he licks at her clit she can’t recall a single name of any other boy she’s ever met. He devours her like he was born to do nothing but eat a girl out. There’s kisses followed by kitten licks followed by more kisses. It’s driving her crazy, the way he flicks his tongue.

(Y/N) lifts her leg to rest on his shoulder as her hand reaches down burying herself in his hair. The way she tugs, the slight pangs of pain, it’s delicious. Billy can’t get enough of it. He adds a finger, then two, slowly in and out, the faster, then even faster. He knows she’s close by the way she throws her head back, bites her lips. Her lipstick is everywhere, her hair clings to her skin now from sweat instead of rain. She’s a mess and he’s so proud of getting her to this point. He further spreads her lips, lapping up the wetness, sucking at her clit, making her come undone right there on his kitchen counter.

The moans that fall off of her lips are almost pornographic, he wonders if her parents know the kind of activities she gets up to when they’re away. He bets they don’t. She’s a princess at home. Nice and proper. A princess who spends her free time getting fucked by their poolboy.

Billy pulls away at the last minute which (Y/N) really doesn’t enjoy. She pouts at him, gives him a sound of pure dismay. “ Why did you stop? “ she questions, voice breathy, almost incoherent.

“ Cause I wanna feel you cum when I fuck you. “

He’s not usually this bold and brash. Girls like lovely words. They like soft voices and hushed whispers and for boys to say nice things during sex. Not her. She wants the dirt and the mess and the honesty.

(Y/N)’s hand finds its way back to his crotch, pulling down the zipper of his jeans and freeing his solid boner.

“ No boxers? “ there’s a glimmer of mischief playing in her eyes.

“ You complaining? “

“ Fuck no. I’d suck you off but I want you inside me — like right now. “

Billy only nods, before fumbling a condom from his wallet and pulling it down his cock. He shares her sentiment. All he wants to be right now, is inside her.

Rough hands grab her hips and turn her around before pushing her down. Her boobs as flush against the counter, ass on full display. She’s a sight for sore eyes. A masterpiece.

Billy can’t keep his hands off her ass. He has to grab a handful, squeeze it, caress it. There’s boob guys and butt guys and then there are guys like Billy who know that both those features are mutually phenomenal and to limit yourself by choosing one or the other is a move only a fool would make and he ain’t no fool.

Billy lines himself up at her slit. He can’t wait to feel her around him, wet and warm and throbbing and —

“ What are you waiting for? “ she grunts, impatience clear in her voice and she tries to wiggle her ass closer to him.

“ Patience, baby.” Billy instructs as he grabs onto her hips and pulls her even closer. Her skin is so soft, so perfect. There’s a primal desire in leaving his marks of passion there so he leans over and places little love bites on her shoulder. They’ll be easy for her to cover up with a shirt but he’ll know they are there and that’s all that matters to him.

Slowly, painfully slowly, he trails his erection up and down her entrance, coating it in her arousal. He’s really not looking forward to clean this mess later on but right now it’s damn worth it by the way she’s trembling and wiggling underneath him, desperate for some stimulation.

“ Patience is not a word I know, sorry “ she’s so god damn desperate it almost makes him cum before he even gets a fuck in.

“ Yeah me neither. “

With those words he sinks into her and it feels heavenly. Engulfed by her warmth, her wetness, her passion. Quite frankly, he’s convinced, there’s no better place to be in the entire world, than buried in the pussy of a pretty girl.

Billy moves his hips slowly, deliberately, set a rhythm and a pace. He watches his cock disappear inside of her then slide back out in a delicious cadency as he dings his fingers into her hips, surely leaving bruises.

The moans tumbling from her lips are almost pornographic though he can tell they’re real and honest. There’s no reason for her to fake anything. He’s pretty sure she’d set him straight if he was doing something wrong.

“ more. “ she gasps, breath hitching as she pushes back against him, taking him even deeper. This girl is a dream if he’s ever seen one.

Billy speeds up his movements, slamming into her at a faster pace, pounding her against the counter. The air is hot and both of them are so sweaty and the room smells of sex and salty ocean air. God, he loves California summers and pretty girls.

There’s a fire lit in his lower abdomen as she whimpers and arches her back off of the counter. Billy lifts one hand off of her hips and grabs onto her front, caressing her soft tits and pulling her upright so her back is flush against his chest. The sheen of sweat covering them makes it hard to figure out where one of them ends and the other begins. Right then, they are one. Her peach colored baseball cap falls off of her head and onto the floor, where the rest of their clothes lie discarded.

His hand desperately moves across her chest, squeezing and teasing and trailing fingers around her nipples, hard from arousal.

“ Oh fuck yes. “

The confirmation that he’s doing something right, that he’s making her feel good, makes Billy’s ego grow 3 sizes. He’s such a sucker for validation.

He snaps his hips faster, harder, tries to go deeper. His hand grabs onto her thigh and lifts it up so her knee is resting on the counter letting him fuck her at a whole new angle.

At the way she cries out in ecstasy he knows he’S doing something extremely right. “God, right there. “ she almost sobs. Billy’s sure she’s biting her lip so hard it must be close to drawing blood.

Billy buries his head in her messy hair, softly traces kisses and love bites up and down her neck, tugs on her earlobe with his teeth. “ Yeah? Your pussy is a dream, baby. A fucking dream.” he grunts, voice laced with lust.

“ I’m gonna cum, Billy. “

He can tell, by the way she trembles, clenches around him. By the way her breathing hitches. And he’s right there with her.

There’s a fire pulsing through him, shockwaves rippling. It bubbles in his abdomen then boils over. With every snap of his hips the movements get more arrhythmic, messy, uncoordinated, desperate

A bunch of expletives fall from her lips but Billy can hardly make them out as his own orgasm washes over him. It feels like time slows and every sound disappeared into a white static. Nothing matters then but to chase that high and catch it and get some sweet release.

Billy feels her cum around him, squeezing him tightly in the process. The way she moans his name, as if it’s both a secret and a confession to himself and the world, that’s what does it for him.

Grabbing her hips with both hands, he holds her in place, before pounding into her with a few last uncoordinated hard thrusts. And then his vision goes black for a moment and his brain stops functioning as he cums into the condom.

For a moment there’s no sound but them trying to catch their breath as they slump down against the counter, spent from the activities. Sweaty, filthy, messy. But oh so satisfied and content.

Billy pulls out of her and for a second he misses her warm and tight around him. Like he was meant to stay there forever. Fuck, he’s such a guy.

Another heartbeat passes and (Y/N) lets out a melodic but breathless giggle. “ I could go for some Nachos and Guac right now. “

This girl is really something else.

They devour the snacks while lazing on his couch. Naked as they came to this earth, unbothered. Maybe this is what makes him go so absolutely feral about her, the fact that she’s so uncomplicated. Yeah she comes with all kinds of warning signs and bad news for him but being with her like this it’s so easy. Like they’ve been some kinds of friends for a long time.

Their bodies are always touching in one way or another. As if they can’t get enough. Billy’s sitting on the couch, feet resting on the coffee table while her legs are places on his lap, cigarette dangling from her fingers. The air is sticky and humid and even the late afternoon breeze doesn’t bring any cooling-off.

As his eyes fall onto the clock on the wall, Billy lets out a frustrated grunt. “ Fuck.”

“ What’s the matter?”

“ I’m supposed to meet my friend Johnny at the gym in about 10 minutes. Totally forgot about it. “

“ Do you have to go? “

“ I really should. “

“ You’ve had quite the workout today though. “

Billy scoffs a laugh at her words before plucking the cigarette from her fingers and taking a drag. He lets the smoke sit in his chest for a moment, hoping to capture even a bit of the warmth he felt when buried balls deep inside her cunt.

It doesn’t work.

“ He’s waiting for me. “

“ Aw, that’s too bad. “ she says grabs the cigarette back and, after one last drag, then stubs it out in the ashtray resting on the coffee table. “ I was just about to ask for a round two. Guess I’ll have to do it by myself then. That’s fine. “

Her fingers trail down her body, teasing her nipples before descending towards her slit. She slowly circles her clit. Billy is honesty sure she’ll be the death of him. This girl is so sweet yet so dirty and he’s not sure he’s ever met someone like her.

“ You gonna sit there and finger yourself on my couch ? “

“ You gonna sit there and watch and not join in? Come on Billy, I can give you quite the workout. No gym necessary. Do I have to beg? “

Yes. God he wants to hear her beg but that makes him feel a bit — uneasy. He doesn’t want her to think he doesn’t want this just as much as she does. Maybe they can leave the begging for another day.

“ You’re insatiable, huh? “ he asks as he settles himself on top of her, lips colliding with hers ina fiery kiss.

(Y/N) just nods, a satisfied moan slipping from her lips as his fingers nudge her hand away and replace them softly trailing up and down her slit, slipping inside every once in a while.

“ What can I say? It’s a bad habit I just can’t seem to quit.”

Maybe this is a really bad idea. Maybe he’s getting himself into more trouble than he needs right now. But the way she feels and sounds and taste make it worth it.

As the sun sets upon the horizon and the summer storm has long passed on to another coastal town, Billy thinks that it’s so worth it if only he can feel like this for the rest of the summer.

There’s really nothing quite like a California summer and a pretty girl with a dirty mind.

#billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove imagine #billy hargrove smut #billy hargrove fanfics #billy hargrove fanfiction #billy hargrove fanfic #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things fanfic #stranger things imagine #stranger things imagines #stranger things smut

282 notes · View notes

pizza-soup · 3 years

Text

I had a nice birthday, for breakfast I had some strawberry and red bean crepes. I don't typically have sweets first thing in the morning so it was a treat and perfect to eat on the patio during a sun shower, before it started getting hot. We were supposed to get a storm again today and yeah really got hit. The dirt road turned into a river, effectively cutting us off from civilization. Pretty sure the park flooded again, we might head there tomorrow. I opted to make my own cake this year, usually it would be a tres leche or pineapple upside down cake, but I did something different, a cheesecake. A very simple one that I decorated with fruits I got from the self serve stand, lots of peaches. Someone also generously supplied a basket of fresh lemongrass, just 50 cents for two stalks. I've never tried it fresh but I heard it makes a good tea, so I stuck some in a water bottle. I think it's a new favorite. For dinner I made clam chowder in a tiny mini sourdough round, and seafood salad with feta, shrimp, fish cake, olives and cucumber. My family gave me some really nice gifts. My brother got me a really nice humidifier for my room and one for himself, it can get very dry inside the house and that causes breathing issues for us as we were born in a more moist environment. He also got me one of those Chilly Mini Towels, the kind where you can soak in cold water and put it on your neck and it supposedly cools you down by ten degrees. I was always skeptical of those but it actually works. Naturally he got one for himself too. XD My mom got me really nice Italian soaps, a lemon one and lavender. She used to have them in her bathroom back home and they'd last forever, so I'm happy to get some too. Other things she got was a Pacifica Coconut Water face gel and Cactus water mi cellular water cleanser, as well some Sunbum Heat Protecter for my hair. All of them smell like summer. I got myself some art gifts shipped in, I actually got them two days ago but I didn't open my package til now. It was nothing fancy, just some Koi Watercolors, a pad of canvas paper and Canson watercolor paper. I turned one sheet into postcards for etegami style art tomorrow. I would've done it today but I started cleaning up the pantry, which was getting really cluttered, then just sort of started experimenting with my new art supplies all day as the rain fell. I really love the neon watercolors, I feel like I can do some neat stuff on black paper with them. Annnd that's it. I had a nice peaceful birthday!

#Daily post

6 notes · View notes

lokimostly · 4 years

Text

Polaris (Ch.16/?)

Loki x Reader, Pirate!AU

Word Count: 4,466

Warnings: violence, language

Summary: Your life has always been set in stone. Born to a wealthy merchant family in the Caribbean, you’ve spent your years as an heiress in the daytime, escaping at night to wander the streets of St. Thomas. Now, on the eve before your life settles into mundanity for good, you discover someone who could change everything– if you choose to trust him, that is.

A/N: As promised, this chapter is entirely from Loki’s perspective! Don’t worry, we’ll get back to our debutante reader soon. For now, this is his part of the story. Let’s let him tell it.

Chapter One ~ Chapter Two ~ Chapter Three ~ Chapter Four ~ Chapter Five ~ Chapter Six ~ Chapter Seven ~ Chapter Eight ~ Chapter Nine ~ Chapter Ten ~ Chapter Eleven ~ Chapter Twelve ~ Chapter Thirteen ~ Chapter Fourteen ~ Chapter Fifteen

The sun was making its first appearance over the glass sea, turning the sky pink and lighting on the waves with a rosy glow. The clouds were as pale and wispy as stretched cotton. As the sunrise dimmed the map of stars above, it burned bright in the reflection of Loki’s bloodshot eyes, staring out at the waves as they turned to gold.

His hands were already blistered from rowing. The sinew of his muscles had been stretched to their limit a few hours ago, and so he had let go of the oars to hold his head in his hands instead, filled with a despair that felt larger than the ocean around him. Hot, frustrated tears fell from his eyes, more to try and soothe their dryness than to curb the aching in his chest. Perhaps it was a mix of both. It was only in raising his head to dry his eyes, blinking away the water and fatigue, that he saw the merchant ship approaching.

Loki’s brows pulled together. It was a trading company ship; not Odin’s. Rather small. The bell on deck was ringing, signaling a man overboard as they approached, and a few seconds later, a rope landed in Loki’s lap.

Several pairs of hands helped haul him over the side, pulling him onto the deck, but they were quick to leave him; Loki’s reddened eyes and haggard look gave him a frightening aura, one that the men obviously weren’t keen to hang around. He slowly straightened his posture, rolling his sore shoulders and looking down at the Captain, standing in front of him.

Loki gave him a single glance, surveying him without much consideration. He was small and portly with receding hair, hardly intimidating– though clearly he was doing his best to look nonplussed by Loki’s sudden and unexpected arrival.

“Glad to have you aboard, sir,” he greeted, as warmly as he was able. “I’m Cap’n Montgomery, and this’s my ship The Duchess. How’d you wind up all the way out here?”

Loki didn’t answer. He stood still on the rocking deck, his posture stiff, looking out at the pale dawn sky with a hardened expression.

Captain Montgomery waited awkwardly for his response, shifting his posture. Then he cleared his throat. “Perhaps you’d like to talk elsewhere?” He gestured to the doors that led to the Captain’s cabin.

Loki’s eyes trailed to the left, and he nodded. He followed the Captain inside, walking slow and cat-like with a look of apprehension as he stepped over the threshold. His eyes were quick in surveying the small room, unadorned by lavish decor. The only notable object of interest was the mahogany desk that Captain Montgomery sat himself behind, setting his elbows atop its surface and waiting for Loki to close the door.

He did so, and stepped over. The ship’s charter laid open-faced by the Captain’s hand, and Loki’s dark eyebrows pulled together. “Where is this vessel headed?”

Captain Montgomery’s eyebrows raised and he held out his hand in a stopping motion. “Now, hang on a minute. I have some questions to ask you first–”

Loki reached forward and spun the paper to face him, scanning the lines. “Kingston?”

The Captain’s eyes flickered. “Aye, that’s right, sir.”

Loki’s frown deepened. “That is exactly the opposite of where I need to go,” Loki muttered in annoyance.

The man shifted in his seat, visibly uncomfortable. “Well–”

“What day is it?” Loki interrupted again, looking up at him. His gaze was sharp enough to cut glass. They might have been a different color, but when he wanted them to, Loki’s eyes could hold just as much chill as his father’s.

The Captain blinked. “Uh– the first of August, sir.”

“What was your name again?”

“Mont– Montgomery. Captain Montgomery.”

Loki hummed shortly, leaning on the desk. He glanced back at the closed doors, then returned to the paper in front of him, running a finger over his lip in thought. The captain watched him uneasily as he stood there, still as stone, with nothing but the rocking of the ship to mark the passage of time.

Suddenly Loki reached forward and grabbed the captain by the collar, slamming his face into the mahogany and twisting his arm behind his back in one fluid motion. The Captain shouted in surprised pain, only to be silenced when Loki twisted his arm further, his lips curled in a snarl.

“Listen to me very carefully, Montgomery,” he threatened between his teeth. “It is in our mutual best interests that you take this ship to St. Thomas immediately. One more inch in the wrong direction and this arm will break. If you don’t do as I say, the same thing will happen to your neck.”

The Captain struggled fruitlessly beneath Loki’s grip, his face squashed against the desk in a contorted expression of anger. “You – you bastard!”

“Pirate,” Loki corrected, applying the slightest fraction of pressure. It was enough to make the captain gasp and pant in pain. “Do we understand each other, Montgomery?”

“It’ll–” The Captain wheezed, struggling to speak. “It’ll take more’n three days to get there. The wind… the wind’s against us.”

“Then you should bear a hand and tell your men to come around,” Loki suggested coldly, and let go of him. Captain Montgomery stood up so fast that he stumbled backwards, holding his arm and staring at Loki with frightened eyes. He darted past Loki and out of the cabin, running faster than Loki suspected he ever had in his life. Judging by his portly stature, it was probably a good thing for him. Nothing like a healthy fear of death to keep you fit.

Loki stood in the empty cabin and listened to the muted sounds of the captain shouting orders above, and he tightened his jaw, reaching into his pocket. The cold coin was there, safely stowed away. He rubbed it between his fingers, smoothing over the serpent’s pattern with the pad of his thumb. His eyes drifted to the window. Somewhere, out there, you were being held in a cell – stuck behind rusted bars while the sand in the hourglass slowly sifted through.

August the first. That meant he had until the end of the month to secure your safety, with at least four days already spent by the time he reached St. Thomas. Loki’s grip tightened on the coin. If fate had pushed you together – and he firmly believed that hit had – then fate would keep you from being pulled apart.

Nearly a week later, The Duchess floated into the rainy port of St. Thomas. The sun peeked out occasionally behind the clouds while it showered. It was one of those odd, rainy summer days before hurricane season where the weather couldn’t quite whip up enough energy to storm with full rage and intensity; not yet.

The sailors were still tying the small merchant ship to the dock when the gangplank dropped and Loki descended from the ship, running down the slippery wharf so fast that he nearly stumbled. He dodged the men loading crates, ducking underneath a load of lumber carried between two sailors, and climbed the cobble stairs with exhausted determination.

Home was only a few hours away, but Loki wasn’t headed there; not yet. Instead he headed up the street, doing his best to keep his tired legs from giving out underneath him. He made a right and found the corner bar, stumbling inside. This was the place you and Loki had first encountered one another, but also somewhere that he’d frequented long before your fateful meeting. The creaking floorboards beneath his feet were as familiar as the mattress of his own bed, and the heady smells of mahogany and beer reassured his senses that he was safe. Home.

Being the middle of the day, the corner bar was totally devoid of customers. Light streamed in through the fogged windows while the building’s only occupant, the bartender, polished glasses behind the counter with monotonous repetition, glancing up only when Loki pulled himself into one of the barstools and leaned against the counter, his hair and clothes dripping wet. The only sounds were the steady shower of light rain outside and the squeak of fabric rubbed against glass.

“You’re a bit early in the day, young master,” The bartender observed curiously. The man sported a heavy accent behind his mustache, but his tone was good-natured and amiable. He was as much a part of the bar as the polished countertop and neatly lined bottles on the shelves behind him.

“I need a drink,” Loki said hoarsely, dropping his head into one hand and massaging his temples. His whole body ached, inside and out. Beating slow inside his chest, Loki’s heart weighed him down as though it was made of lead.

The glass slid down the counter and Loki caught it with his free hand: cold, polished glass with dark liquor inside. He tilted his head back and downed it in one go, setting the empty cup down on the polished wood. The bartender refilled it without asking, handing it back to him before returning to his former task. He polished the cups until they sparkled like crystal, despite the fact that they were already clean; no doubt it was a soothing, repetitive notion to help the empty afternoon hours pass by. “You ‘ere to talk, or just drink?”

Loki scoffed. “What’s there to talk about?” He asked, squeezing his eyes shut and rubbing them tiredly. Dull sparks floated behind his vision, signs of dehydration and an oncoming headache.

“Fair ‘nough, sir. I won’t press you.”

Loki dropped his hand and regarded the man with a flat expression. His mouth pressed into a thin line, and he dropped his gaze, spinning the glass of liquor in his hand. He stared at the distorted wood pattern of the bartop through the brown liquor.

The bartender watched him with soft, dark eyes for a moment longer before he tried again. “Is it a woman?”

“Of course it’s a woman,” Loki snapped, though his words didn’t have much bite; they never did when he was telling the truth. He thumbed the rim of the glass. “It’s the woman,” he admitted, more quietly.

The bartender nodded knowingly, tossing his rag aside and fetching a fresh one. “She leave you?” He asked, his tone conversational and unassuming, from decades of practice with discussions far more delicate than this one.

Loki shook his head. His wet raven hair slipped past his shoulders when he did, falling in gentle waves past his ears and smelling of saltwater. “No. I lost her.” He frowned at the sudden blurriness in his eyes, downing his second glass and setting it down with a gentle thud. He sniffed. Straightened in his seat. “I’m getting her back.” Whether he said this to reassure the bartender or himself, Loki wasn’t entirely sure.

The city bell tolled out the hour, bringing him back to a state of clarity. It was later than he’d thought. Loki reached into his pocket for money to pay – and then realized he didn’t have any, apart from the serpent coin. The coin he couldn’t give away. Loki stalled, his elegant fingers still at his sides while he tried to think of a solution to this sudden dilemma.

The bartender noticed his hesitation and extended his hand with a polite shake of his head. “You’ve been generous in the past, young master,” he stated. “I trust you’ll be back.”

Loki met his eyes. Normally he would take offense to a gesture of charity; Loki had never lacked for money, not once in his life, and he never intended to. But if he’d learnt anything from the past weeks, it was that even his best intentions didn’t guarantee the future. He met the bartender’s eyes and found them to be soft and reassuring. He bowed his head. “Thank you.”

The man shrugged, like it wasn’t any problem to him, taking Loki’s empty glass and polishing it alongside all the rest. “Bring your woman next time.”

Loki laughed once, humorlessly, and stood. “I will,” he promised, with a final nod of thanks before he turned his back to the bartender and walked back out towards the drenched cobblestone street, feeling renewed somehow – perhaps by the drink, though more likely by the man’s kindness. Not everyone in the world was bloodthirsty and rotten.

Not everyone in the world is a pirate, Loki thought. Of course, he considered himself a rare exception: Loki was a pirate, yes, but a reputable one. Honorable, even. However – somewhere deep in his heart – Loki was beginning to come to terms with the fact that getting you back might permanently soil that reputation. He intended to do whatever it took, however foul, even if it meant killing Vane and all his crewmen with his bare hands.

Would you be able to love him, if it came to that? If he became a murderer? Would you let him touch you with bloody hands, or would you turn away in fear and disgust?

The thought disquieted him, and he shook his head to clear the thought. Whether you hated him or not at the end of this didn’t matter, so long as you got out alive. He owed you that much.

His seaglass eyes looked up instinctively towards the road that he knew lead home, but he turned the opposite way instead: there was still one more errand to run.

In order for Loki to both save you and maintain a clear ledger inside his father’s business, he had to find a way to combine the two. That meant enlisting in his family’s help, while simultaneously making it look like he wasn’t involved at all. During his time floating adrift in the waves, waiting for the sunrise, Loki had surmised a plan of action. With some skill, and a great deal of luck, it would prove itself successful.

He hoped his luck hadn’t run out yet.

Loki found himself in a familiar backside alley, the entrance hidden behind empty fruit crates stacked six feet high. He stepped carefully down the narrow cobble path, wrinkling his nose at the stench of city sludge and old bathwater dumped unceremoniously onto the ground. The clotheslines above hung limp in the afternoon, the fabric heavy and wet from the rain – whoever put them out had neglected to retrieve them. He found the heavy wooden door with gold hinges and knocked, twice. Then he stepped back into the rain, no more than a light mist at this point, and waited.

He was considering turning away when it finally opened. The man who answered the door had dark skin and eyes that shimmered like copper. His hair fell over his broad shoulders in locs, decorated with metal clasps. His face wore a stern expression that revealed exactly nothing, and he waited with one hand on the door – prepared to shut it again at a moment’s notice. “Yes?”

“Heimdall,” Loki greeted solemnly, and glanced out at the alley for listening ears.

“You don’t have an appointment.”

“This isn’t my usual business,” he explained, squinting as misty rainwater dripped down his face and clung to his eyelashes. “It’ll be quick. I only need one page; no forgings, no signatures. It just can’t be my hand.”

The dark man hesitated, gripping the door while he considered this. Loki’s clothes stuck to him, and he silently wished that Heimdall would at least let him inside, but he knew not to press the matter. Their relationship was a strictly professional one, and he knew how much he was asking. “I’ll pay twice whatever you ask,” he added.

Heimdall’s copper eyes met Loki’s, his expression still flat, and then he opened the door further. “Come in. Don’t sit. You’ll ruin the chair.”

Loki obliged, stepping in quickly. The room was dark and smelled of leather, lit only by candles and the narrow, cross-hatched windows that lined one wall. The other three sides of the small, square space were lined by bookshelves, lined with bottles, parchment, and bookkeeper’s tools. Less conspicuously, there were a few shelves full of antiquated volumes, which he knew to contain ledgers upon ledgers of signatures and scripts. A forger’s library.

Heimdall sat down at the desk, dipping his quill into the inkwell. “You’re lucky. I’m not busy today.”

Loki nodded in agreement, feeling relieved. “Yes, I know – it’s short notice.”

“So,” Heimdall began without looking, pulling a clean sheet of plain paper from the desk drawer. “This isn’t a false shipping charter, or an inventory log, or a bank note. What is it?”

“A ransom letter.” Loki regretted revealing this information the moment it left his mouth, but he had no choice – better to tell it now, rather than when Heimdall started realizing it halfway through writing and risked blotting a page.

Heimdall’s metallic eyes flitted up and he frowned at Loki, setting the quill down and leaning back in his chair. “Now, why would you want me to write that?”

Loki looked up and set his jaw, shaking his head slightly. “That, I can’t tell you.”

Heimdall regarded him silently. Whether it was judgement, scrutiny, contemplation, Loki couldn’t say for certain. Heimdall’s expression didn’t change. While Loki respected his ability to be discreet, Heimdall’s strong-and-silent personality made reading him nigh impossible. Finally, he raised one eyebrow. “It’ll cost extra.”

Loki’s mouth opened slightly and he nearly rolled his eyes. “I can afford it,” he grated, feeling a flicker of agitation in his chest that the man would even be concerned about such a thing. “This isn’t a fleeting interest. Give me what I want, receipt it under my private catalogue, and I’ll be on my way. ”

Heimdall sighed and picked up his quill again, leaning over the desk. “Fine.”

Loki inhaled deeply, raising his eyebrows and directing his gaze to the ceiling. He’d been devising a speech from memory for a week, running it over his tongue inside his mouth and sounding it out when no one was around. He dropped his eyes and began reciting the words from memory, watching Heimdall’s skilled hand start painting the words on the page almost as soon as he spoke. “To his esteemed grace who receives this note …”

“... I hope it finds in a prosperous enough position to enable us both to get what we want,” Thor read aloud, his elegant brow furrowed in both concentration. He unfolded the letter further and skimmed a few more lines silently. Flipped it over, and found no return address. He looked up at the maid standing at the door and held it up in the air. “What is this?”

Her eyes were wide with innocence and confusion. “I – I don’t know, sir, it was delivered with all the rest.”

Loki sat silently at one end of the long table, holding a spoon in his hand and stirring the bowl of soup before him in slow, disinterested circles. Green flecks of some kind of vegetable rose and fell from its cream-colored surface; neat chunks of tomato, too, alongside pale meat cooked to perfection and pulled apart.

It was a favorite of his. He knew this, somewhere in the back of his mind, but even the smell of it wafting up in gentle curls of steam failed to appetize him. Every ounce of his focus was bent on looking unassuming as Thor continued to read the note aloud; the note that he’d carefully hidden amongst the other letters, delivered at breakfast every morning.

“I have in my possession one soon-to-be bride of your eldest son. I understand she means a great deal to you, so let me get to the point: in exchange for 12,000 guineas, I will return her unharmed, so long as the exchange is made at the end of August…” Thor’s brow furrowed further.

Loki had been home for three days– it was the ninth of August now, and an otherwise ordinary Wednesday morning. It felt strange to know the date again after being stuck on an island, where the only sense of time could be ascertained in the rise and set of the sun.

Only last night had he decided to risk delivering the note. Waiting to reveal your situation to Thor and his father was agony, but Loki couldn’t afford to take any kind of risk. The coincidence of his arrival and the note’s arrival on the same day would have been too close for comfort. Loki was cautious to a fault, and he was painfully aware of that fact: he was treading on your borrowed time, after all. His stomach twisted, feeling physically ill, and he abandoned the spoon entirely, staring out the window with a thinly veiled expression of discomfort as Thor finished reading.

“Otherwise, she will die gruesomely, after her usefulness and entertainment to us has been spent. With a letter V as the signit,” he added as an afterthought, setting the letter down carefully, like it might bite him. He reached for the envelope it had been delivered in and tilted it, and the serpent coin fell into his palm. He gazed at it in silence.

Loki was practically crawling out of his skin. “V,” he repeated, breaking the silence with false curiosity and looking between Thor and his father. “Like Charles Vane, perhaps? The pirate?”

“No doubt,” Odin replied amiably, reaching across the table for the letter. Thor handed it to him, his expression stony, waiting while their father read the ransom note over for himself. He let out a derisive scoff and shook his head, letting it drop. “Twelve thousand guineas.”

Thor’s handsome face lit on confusion. “You will pay the ransom, won’t you? Her ship was supposed to arrive in Norway weeks ago. Who knows how long she’s been held captive.”

“That much for one girl?” Odin said skeptically. “A girl who wasn’t keen on marrying you either, I recall. Ungrateful thing. The whole arrangement has been nothing more than a bad business venture.”

Loki’s face was dangerously pale, anger lighting up his veins like fire on alcohol. “But we have the money,” he argued, trying to keep his vocal tone only mildly invested. It cracked. “And you made a deal with her father.”

Thor nodded in agreement, though clearly exhibiting a great deal more patience. “Loki’s right, Father. We have a duty of care–”

“Silence!” He interrupted, and they both shut their mouths. Odin set down his fork to eye both of them with a steely grey stare. “There is nothing we can do.”

“But we can,” Thor argued, leaning against the table on one hand and gesturing with the other. “We’ve seen the bank ledgers – Loki and I both,” he added, nodding to his brother. “Your wealth would hardly be dented. I don’t see why –”

“I will not deal with pirates,” Odin groused firmly, his voice icy and cold.

Something inside Loki snapped. He stood abruptly, turning to Odin. The chair scraped on the ground behind him.

“So that’s it, then,” he began. He was smiling, but in more a baring of teeth than an expression of joy. “You would first resign her to marry a man she doesn’t know, and then let her die when it’s inconvenient to help?” He pointed an accusing finger. “You’re just afraid Vane will slip through your grasp, the same way he did before, and wound your pride more than he ever could your prospects.” Loki realized that he was snarling, his lip curled and tone venomous, cheeks flushed uncharacteristically red but he didn’t care – it was too late now. The man who he called Father stared back with equal animosity, the two of them locked in heated, palpable silence.

Thor excused himself from the dining room with a quiet, grumbling apology, and Loki followed.

When he exited the room and the doors shut behind him, he saw Thor walking down the hall – but his footsteps were slow, and he clearly didn’t know where they intended on taking him. Loki’s eyes flickered, and he sighed, loud enough to draw Thor’s attention and halt his steps.

He turned around and came to Loki’s side. He watched his brother reach up and press at his eyes, rubbing them none-too-gently, and he glanced back at the gilded door. “It sounded like you know a great deal about her,” he stated quietly, breaking the thin silence between them. His large hands were restless at his sides, wanting for actions instead of words.

Loki dropped his hand and cleared his throat, and his eyes were distant. “I spoke with her at the ball before she left. You remember.”

Thor grunted, looking out the window. “I didn’t get the chance. I had business to attend to.”

Loki’s lips upturned in a bitter smirk. “You always do.” His gaze found the window, too, staring out at the palm fronds as they blew in the humid afternoon wind. His chest tightened with the reminder of your island – the trees and the cave, of your smaller body pressed beneath his, smelling sweet and tinged by saltwater. Of feeling complete.

Loki could only guess at how much his father knew. Thanks to his outburst, Odin knew Loki was aware of his true parentage – which meant it would only take one line drawn in the sand between Loki and Vane to connect the dots and undo all his work. Your life and Loki’s livelihood, felled in one devastating blow.

Thor was uncharacteristically still, a sign that he was deep in thought. His wide arms were crossed over his barrel of a chest, brow furrowed, and he shook his head almost imperceptibly, silently dissatisfied. “We have to do something.”

Loki scoffed and rolled his eyes, picking at the dark green fabric of his wide sleeves and spreading his fingers, staring disinterestedly at the faint scars that lined the back of his hand from years of seamanship. “Don’t humor me. You would never act outside father’s orders.”

“I would,” Thor argued, and paused, glancing over his shoulder at Loki. “If I had help.”

Loki’s expression flickered and he looked up, meeting Thor’s gaze. The two of them shared a silent exchange; the same kind that they had since boyhood, a silent discussion and a mutual agreement. Perhaps your cause wasn’t lost after all.

The corner of Thor’s mouth turned up in a smile, and he shrugged his broad shoulders, returning his gaze to the window. “Besides,” he added, “What kind of husband would I be if I couldn’t keep her alive?”

At the same time as a humoring chuckle left his lips, Loki’s breath was punched from his lungs. Realization hit him like a hollow bell – something he had forgotten to consider when he decided to enlist Thor’s help. The two of you were, by all accounts, still engaged. If Thor and Loki succeeded in rescuing you, you would wed him all the same, hopelessly stuck in the same trap as before. His mind searched frantically for an easy solution, some weakness in this sudden and unexpected obstacle, but to his growing panic he found none, and a feeling of utter hopelessness rooted inside his chest that was too deep to claw out.

Loki might yet be able to save your life. But it wouldn’t be a life with him that you’d return to.

~~~

Tag List (open): @neontiiger, @un-consider-it, @jessiejunebug, @nerdypisces160, @lokiisntdeadbitch, @e-wolf-90, @cursedmoonstone-blog, @kikaninchen-2, @bluebellhairpin, @evy-lyn, @midnight-queen-1, @travelingmypassion, @harrybpoetry, @adefectivedetective, @absolutecraziness13, @kumikokagato, @randomfangirl7, @timetraveler1978, @tarynkauai, @arcanethamin, @ornate-ribcage, @julianettedoe, @kinghiddlestonanddixon, @yespolkadotkitty, @befearlesslyauthenticc, @ladybugsfanfics, @thisisaclusterofablog, @groupies-do-it-better, @just-the-hiddles, @quenilla, @amyy-moonlightt, @pandacookieowo, @thatweirdwalangpake, @alexakeyloveloki, @littlemissporter, @yes-captainstark, @dearspacepirates, @beautyandflannel, @eyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, @myoxisbroken, @rjohnson1280, @the-republic-and-face-of-texas, @snapessecretdiary, @sailortaylorfin, @cottoncandy1010, @androgynousdeputyfarmhero, @blackcherry26-blog, @saljstuff, @devilbat, @scarlettghost13, @arch-venus25, @is-it-madness, @deliriousgeek, @ladyhubris, @myraiswack, @mazda098, @orpheus-you-dingus, @wombatgirl-blog, @brightranger, @wittysidecharacter, @lokislilslut

160 notes · View notes

merryfortune · 3 years

Text

The Monster in the Fruits Basket

hi @ina-bon I was your secret santa on the discord

Fandom: Yu-Gi-Oh! VRAINS

Ship: Takeru/Kiku

Word Count: 5,876

Tags: Alternate Universe - Fruits Basket, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Minor or Implied Child Abuse

“I don’t like it here anymore, Gramps…” Takeru confessed and he stared at his hands whilst thinking about her. Kiku. “It feels like I’m sitting in a lukewarm bath. I’m just getting pruney.”

His Grandfather regarded him cautiously. Ever with a stern brow and a stern upper lip.

Takeru swallowed. “I want to go out and fend for myself again for a bit. I’m sick of being here. I want to pursue my passions in judo and other martial arts. When we went camping for those few months last year, it was the best time of my life. I feel antsy and dull in comparison to living here. With them.”

“I disagree.” his Grandfather said. “I think you are making excuses.”

“I’m not!” Takeru snarled, he banged his hand on the table.

The door slid and Kiku was there, she was holding onto a tray of rice balls and looked jumpy and apologetic. Takeru looked up at her and the grizzle in his face all but vanished when he saw her. His eyes were wide, lit up, and for a moment, a flicker of remorse for having raised his voice.

“Sorry, this is a bad time. But, when you're ready to come down stairs, there will be rice balls and other refreshments.” Kiku said and she excused herself just as quickly as she had interrupted.

“I disagree vehemently.” Takeru’s Grandfather insisted, a low growl to his voice.

Takeru glared. He felt like he was pushing at a wall which wouldn’t budge for it was all bricked up and mortared and more. And when that energy expired, he collapsed over the table, burying his head in the crooks of his overlapping, folded arms. The beads - bone yellow and blood orange - clinked on his wrist and glinted in the fluorescence of his bedroom’s light on the ceiling.

This was twice now that Takeru’s Grandfather had to see his own, intimate kin wear that bracelet.

He recalled meeting The Cat as a youth but his youth may as well have been another world with how it changed and collided. He had been playing out in the courtyard with a ball, just bouncing it off every surface available whilst trying not to hit any of the servants or other passerbys until it bounced to the other end. Into what appeared to be a barely open shed. He had crept inside and found a man in a beautiful kimono in a small room but he was caged. He was also holding the handball that he had been playing. They exchanged pleasantries and the man handed back the ball and he left. The man seemed glad to have had a visitor but his visitor was unsettled by the whole exchange, it seemed so ordinarily peculiar.

He would only later learn that person was The Cat but he would learn it at a wake he unintentionally attended.

After that Cat died, the next one was born and after that surreal moment, like a dollop of honey on a wooden spoon, in a summer afternoon, playing handball, the next Cat was born to him and his wife. He liked to think that he had done his best to raise the next Cat but life was arbitrary.

Takeru shouldn’t have been born the Cat but his father died before he even learned he was a father. A freak accident. It could have been anyone. And his mother. His poor mother. She drove herself to madness because of her husband’s death and when her son was born, when she held him in her arms for the first time, still covered in the mire of being born, he did not remain a baby. He grew fur and claws, became a white and ginger kitten.

It was harrowing for her to say the least and for six years, Takeru never saw his grandparents or even the outside world. He was his mother’s little treasure in every sense of possession. His little hands forever checked for stray hairs and claws. His little wrist was the most delicate of all as she checked that the rosary against all that being inhabited by the spirit and jealous of the Cat entailed. The rituals of it all were ceaseless until one day she didn’t come home from grocery shopping and she still hadn’t even ten years later.

“I think you should go down and have something to eat.” Takeru’s Grandfather told him.

“I’m not hungry.” Takeru complained.

“You should eat regardless, then.” his Grandfather continued. “You will need the strength tonight. There’s a storm.”

“I’m not some little kid anymore,” Takeru spat, “I’m not afraid of storms.”

His Grandfather smirked and there was a clash of thunder. Takeru stiffened to the last hair on the back of his neck.

“Then this discussion is over. Until further notice, I want you to stay here, in this lukewarm bath as you called it. If you run away, I will make sure she brings you back.” his Grandfather said.

Takeru lifted his head off the table and his arms, he quirked his brow, “She? Whose she? At least do it yourself, you lazy old fart.” Takeru growled.

His Grandfather ignored him. Gracefully, he got to his feet and Takeru scrambled to join him, a flurry of limbs until he straightened up. They left Takeru’s room and came down stairs to where everyone was. The atmosphere decidedly terse.

Everyone was clustered around the long, low table in the centre of the room, trying to avoid the windows as they banged and rattled. At the moment, it was more the wind than the rain itself which had everyone on edge - assuming it was the weather at all which had made them uncomfortable, and not whatever they had overheard from upstairs between Takeru and his Grandfather.

Still, Kiku sat on her knees and she already had two plates at the ready as she hailed down Takeru and his Grandfather. Takeru readily sat down next to her as she piled one rice balls onto his plate before sliding it towards him with a smile. Takeru’s grandfather observed her, still standing up, awkwardly hovering close to Shoichi and Jin who were watching similarly twitchy.

“See? No chives since I know you don’t like chives.” Kiku piped up. “Oh, and these ones are tuna-mayo since those are your favourite but this one’s chicken.”

Takeru smiled. “Thanks, Kiku.” he replied but as he accepted the food, his smile faltered. He was thankful for her but she also represented too much to him but he ate the food to be polite. “It’s good.”

“I’m glad to hear it.” Kiku smiled.

With Takeru eating, it could be argued that the atmosphere was easing up from its irrational tenseness. Even Ryoken, who was sitting in the corner, like the mouse that he was, had unhooked his arms from around him and had reached for more of Kiku’s rice balls. She encouraged Ryoken to take more but saying that prickled Takeru, so he grabbed another - one which didn’t appear flecked with chives - and wolfed it down all but immediately.

He didn’t spare a moment to savour it as he swallowed. He was just thankful for the food. It somehow felt that dinner was so long ago but it wasn’t really. The argument that he had had with his Grandfather had simply exacerbated that distance but the rice balls were good. Kiku was a good - no, great - cook. From the moment that she had arrived at this hodgepodge house for the exiles of the Main Kogami manor, Kiku had been charming all of those around her.

Takeru kind of wished he had been there. That moment when she had all but turned up out of the blue and introduced herself to her so-called neighbours; enchanting Shoichi with not only her etiquette but her knowledge of the Chinese Zodiac. His little painted models had been fatefully sitting out in the sun and she had mentioned it to him, talked about how adorable they were but it was a set of twelve rather than thirteen and she was the biggest fan of the Cat from the story. She didn’t want him to be lonely.

But Takeru was the Cat and he wanted to be lonely because bad things happened to those around him when he was anything but lonely.

Yet, since meeting Kiku, Takeru had felt a slight change in him. A transformation different to how he became the Cat and how he became… nevermind that. Kiku was the reason that his fingers were pruning in this lukewarm bath. She treated him with a kindness that he wasn’t used to. Telling him he had a plum on his back and that she wanted to learn things about him, from him, going so far as to do her own research on subjects that he liked such as martial arts. She was dense and happy-go-lucky but her laugh was like nectar. He liked it best when she was smiling, with her golden eyes all lit up like the sun.

Soon enough, Takeru had eaten more than the lion’s share of the rice balls that Kiku had prepared, disgruntling Ryoken in the process but having seen his grandson eat so vigorously, Takeru’s Grandfather was pleased. Yes, there was a tentative serenity to sitting around, having a snack after dinner. There was even laughter and Shoichi, who was standing around, watching, hoping Jin wouldn’t come down from his nap at an inopportune time because it seemed like now was the time to strike. Just when there was a lull in the group.

“Takeru,” his grandfather interrupted the teenagers at the low table, “I want to go outside. To spar.”

“Huh? What?” Takeru half-growled, raising an eyebrow at the absurdity of such a demand. “It’s pouring outside.”

“I think it could be fun,” Shoichi piped up, voice suspiciously airy, “and its not pouring, just… spitting.”

Everyone glanced out the door on that. Opened just enough to let a breeze in because the days had grown humid and stuffy thanks to the spring showers. And it was dark out there but not with thick storm clouds. Just with twilight settling down in the puddles.

“Ooh, you could show me that left hook that you’ve been working on, pretty please?” Kiku emphasised, taking the bait that Shoichi had set out. “You’re always talking about what a great judo master your grandfather is, I want to see this in action.”

“It would be nice.” Takeru said, embarrassedly thinking about how he had been hankering to do just that for the past day since his Grandfather had come around to visit.

“Good.” Ryoken piped up. “I’ll look forward to seeing an old man kick your ass.” Yet despite his stoking remarks, he seemed dubious of this sudden exhibition match between Takeru and his grandfather.

“Oh, shut up.” Takeru snarled but in a more playful way than usual.

“Should we wake Jin up?” Kiku asked, looking towards Shoichi. “It sounds exciting, he should come down.”

Shoichi waved her off. “Him getting enough rest is more important, besides, his sport of choice is soccer. Not martial arts, I doubt he’d be interested.”

“Yeah, that’s true…” Kiku agreed.

With that settled, despite a strange crackling feeling in the air which wasn’t lightning about to strike, everyone got up and shuffled outdoors. Going from the cool air conditioning indoors, just behind a sliver of glass, to getting out into the soggy grass of the front yard was disconcerting. It was humid - sticky and all encompassing - and getting dark. Storm clouds brewed and despite the subtle strangeness of it all, Takeru and his Grandfather took position in front of their crowd.

Kiku stood with Shoichi who stood with Ryoken who stood by himself, out the front, just by the window. Kiku clasped onto her hands, cooing, as she watched how Takeru and his Grandfather eyed each other down. It was heated and fiery, without words, as they stared, readying their stances, and then pouncing.

They all gasped as Takeru was entirely outclassed by his grandfather. Takeru couldn’t let a single strike on his grandfather; he seemed so strangely clumsy compared to his grandfather who avoided him with ease. The nimbleness that Kiku, and even Ryoken, associated with Takeru seemed so slow as his grandfather blocked and parried his decisive movements.

“Appalling.” his Grandfather scolded him.

Takeru gritted his teeth as he tried to force a landing on his Grandfather but he was stopped entirely. His Grandfather took his forearm and grabbed him. It was a reversal of all Takeru’s raw strength funnelled into his own upheaval. Takeru landed with a thud on his back on the ground. Kiku grimaced as she knew she would be the one to do the laundry later.

“Is that it?” Shoichi asked. He scratched his goatee in thought.

Takeru’s Grandfather sank to Takeru’s level. “You’re short-sighted, boy.” he said.

“You don’t say?” Takeru sassed him. “Better get new glasses, I’ve been on the wrong prescription for years then.” He wasn’t even wearing his glasses tonight; they had been annoying him.

His Grandfather rolled his eyes at him. “You need help. To get better at your practice, you need a more holistic and unafraid approach. One more balanced than brute strength. And I’m going to show you how.”

Takeru’s eyes widened as he had the ghost of a question on his tongue, “What…?” he barely managed to eek out of his mouth as he had a terrible realisation of just how helpless he was in this position. His grandfather took his hand and Takeru watched as the bracelet around his wrist, supported and protected, was removed.

It felt as though time slowed for Takeru as he tried to get up, tried to get the bracelet back, tried to resist every inch of what was happening to him.

Shoichi stood, gawking, and guilty. He was acting strange but he couldn’t look away. Completely unlike Ryoken who shut down with what was happening. He looked away, eyes closed tight, and Kiku noticed how he flinched. She had an exclamation or a gasp just beyond her lips but she could only focus on Takeru as he ripped himself from the ground and how his Grandfather let the bracelet drop into the mud. A transformation completely unlike anything Kiku had seen occurred.

When Kiku had first arrived at this house, it had been one accident after another which led into a spiral of female on male contact. Nothing serious. Just hugs and even something as simple as brushing up against Shoichi and then Ryoken and then Takeru had caused the curse upon them to activate. It was silly and kind of funny in hindsight as the pretty looking young men around turned into a dog, a mouse, and a cat respectively. It had been strange but light-hearted.

This, what was happening now, was strange and anything but light-hearted. It was monstrous.

There was genuine fear and horror in Takeru’s eyes as he tried to get up but his body disobeyed him as he transformed. A transformation that was jagged and unshielded by the mist usually produced by the curse. This was raw and grotesque. A stench emanating through the yard, from Takeru, as his muscles burst and his bones broke, reshaping, until he was anything but human. Or even like an animal.

Ryoken refused to look towards Takeru’s general direction; he had a hand clamped over his mouth and he was gagging. Shoichi was transfixed the same way one became transfixed around disasters like car wrecks. He was pale but stern. Kiku. Kiku was somehow both. Her stomach knotted as she recoiled visibly because of the smell and the sights; she wanted to look away, to alleviate the strange and horrible feeling in her gut, but she was unable to.

Takeru became a creature the likes of which Kiku had never seen.

His proportions were all wrong. On all fours and with a long tail but his appendages were stooped in ways that looked broken. His fingers were elongated and his bones were sharp beneath the taut skin of a sickly orange. And his muzzle was jagged with huge, gleaming eyes that were predatory and afraid.

His Grandfather rose to his full height and he observed cooly as Takeru launched himself from the ground in shame. In fear.

“Ta...keru-kun?” Kiku murmured. She blinked.

The sound of Takeru’s claws scraping through mud, through tile, through tree branches - wherever he landed in his fleeing leaps and bounds - echoed through the air. It began to rain but the rain barely softened the horrid sounds: the crunching and the breaking.

“That is the other form of the Cat Spirit,” Takeru’s Grandfather began to explain to the dumbfounded Kiku, “does it disgust you?”

Kiku was silent but she leaned forward slightly with a horrified stare and a slackened jaw.

“Does it scare you?” he asked.

Kiku was silent but she was no longer still. She was propelled forward on something like instinct. She kept her head up and she passed by the bracelet in the mud as she kept going forward, as uneven and rock as her steps were. Where she ignored it, Takeru’s Grandfather picked it up and said his prayers for his grandson on it: not praying to any deity, just a girl whom he, and many others affected and involved with curse, had high hopes for.

Kiku ran into the forest. Chasing after Takeru or what had become of him in this other form. She had no idea. She had no idea that the burden of his Curse ran so deep but it certainly explained some things. In the dark, she was blind to everything but she kept going forward, trying to find Takeru, unfettered even as she fell over and tripped. As she knew she had no idea what she was getting into. The instinct she was acting on was the kindness that she had been taught and she valued so dearly.

She had to keep going, she thought to herself, before bile spiked suddenly in the back of her throat. She got up, on her hands, but she felt her whole body weaken and she threw up in front of herself. She wretched quickly, fouled by the taste and the quickness of how it had come from nowhere but it stopped her altogether.

Confusion was thick and rotten all around her. Kiku didn’t know what to do, what would be right and what would be wrong, that was the truth of the matter as she tried to grapple with what she had seen. The sight of Kyo’s transformation was not something that Kiku would forget soon; the botched way his arms bent and the way his eyes gleamed. Recalling them was more than enough to elicit fear from her, making her skin prickle and her stomach squirm again. But, even so, with tears in her eyes and on unsteady legs, Kiku got up. She clutched onto a tree for leverage as she got up. She kept going.

The rain felt freezing after being so hot. It was pouring down now with no end in sight. Only misery.

Takeru sat on his haunches as far away as he could. He pulled up his knees to his chin and buried himself in himself. He clenched his eyes shut and he felt like a child. Beneath the leathery hide of this monstrous form, he felt like a small and vulnerable child again. Between every lash of cold rain, he could swear that he felt his mother’s breath on him, slowly encroaching on him with a cruel and all encompassing embrace, her hands following his limbs along to that bracelet.

Those memories of his mother raked through him. A growl dribbled out of his mouth in genuine pain of them - and of this transformation. It was anything but painless, it felt like sulphur was in his veins. He hated it and he hated her and he especially hated her love. How it was transfixed on making sure he was protected, insulated, from the big, wide world which would hate him more than she hated him.

Takeru whimpered to himself, all alone, on a little island in the middle of the flooded pond in the forest. He just wanted the world to collapse in on itself so he didn’t have to deal with it. He thrashed about, causing landslides around him with his claws but the senseless violence did little to quell all that fear and fury in his heart. Growling, he looked up, and he was surprised to see someone on the edge of the trees, on the shoreline of the pond.

Kiku stood there, wonky and awkward, holding onto herself and a tree. She was looking out across the murky water to him. She tried calling out to him but her voice was too weak. Takeru’s wasn’t.

He snapped at her, shouting, “Go away!” A monstrous snarl to his voice.

Kiku didn’t even flinch as Takeru’s voice boomed across the water and through the rain. She just stared with this sympathetic look to her face.

“Why… Why the hell’re you following me like nothing’s the goddamn matter?!” Takeru growled.

Kiku tried to call Takeru’s name again but he cut her off with a howl. Her body language drooped. Saddened. And yet she stepped forward, nonetheless. The water was cold and thick around her, even at just her ankles.

“I said go away.” Takeru growled, his voice frayed at the edges now. “What’s wrong with you…? Are you blind? Can’t you smell…?”

Kiku kept coming forward. Takeru watched how she waded through the water, how it ate up to her knees now and how she held herself as she approached.

“Don’t you hate me? I-I’m creepy and sickening and we both know it.” Takeru whimpered. But then he turned to a roar: “Why can’t you leave me alone?!”

Kiku slowly set foot on the island that Takeru was on. She felt exhausted. Drenched to the bone, the taste of vomit still on her mouth, to say nothing of the stench that reeked around her so she came to her hands and knees. Still, she crawled closer to Takeru, her eyes wide and huge.

“I don’t need any of your pity.” Takeru murmured.

Kiku listened but she kept crawling closer. Mud on her hands and knees, skirt dragging in the mire. She came within a talking distance of Takeru, stood at his paws on the mound, and looked up at him.

“Please…” he begged her. “Please, don’t do this.”

“Takeru-kun, but I…” Kiku murmured as she lifted a hand to him with the intention of stroking him so that he might feel some vain semblance of comfort in the downpour and misery. “But I love-”

Takeru didn’t want to hear it. The way that seemingly simple word tumbled out of her mouth elicited the worst in Takeru. He struck out. He swiped at Kiku, tossing her back as she was nothing but a rag doll before him. Kiku screamed, more from the impact than from the horror of being hurt by her friend.

“Don’t touch me!” Takeru growled. “Get lost!”

Kiku was thrown into the water. A huge splash followed after her and then nothing. Just the harsh pitter patter of the rain hitting the coarse surface of the water. There was a moment where Takeru watched, with regret, before Kiku rose up. She broke through, panting and gasping, in the shallows on the bough of the island, fingers scrunching through the mire below her as she roiled with how she had been thrown and near drowned.

“You’re annoying, I want you gone.” Takeru spat with guilt. “Next time, I’ll hurt you for real. For good…”

Kiku dithered and her hand drew back. She noticed that the sleeve of her shirt was torn and beneath was fresh, stinging scrapes. She was lucky they were only shallow but they hurt like an acid burn, not just a cut. She clamped her hand over them for searing relief but it was curt. She looked up at Takeru again, her golden eyes looked like umber in the dim rain.

Takeru turned his back on her. He didn’t want to see her anymore and he didn’t want her to see him, either. He begged and begged that she would turn tail but all, save for the rain, was still. Silent.

Then, slowly but surely, with her head hung low, Kiku got up. Water dripped off her in the course of her sluggish movements and she chewed her lower lip. And she made her decision. She turned around and walked off. Her legs like lead as she dragged them through the pond.

Takeru’s ears, long and ribbon-like, anything but feline or human, twitched. He could hear Kiku leave, the sludge that moved around her, and Takeru’s muscles tightened. He wanted to hurt her so bad that she never forgives him. He had hurt her bad enough that she left - and maybe even left for good - and he wanted that and yet, his heart clenched. He didn’t want her to worry about him and Takeru knew - thought - that lashing out was the best option but… but he wanted to look back and he wanted to see Kiku looking back as well. Even if it was just once before moving on for good because things were too wrecked to be fixed or forgiven.

Takeru couldn’t take it anymore. He was sick of losing people; he was sick of pity, he was sick of feeling miserable, and most of all, he was sick of having things forced upon him.

He remembered something his mother said whilst taking his hand, toying with the beads of the bracelet on his wrist, but he couldn’t remember how cruelly she smiled. He remembered her assuring him that no, he was as human as anyone else. It was all just bad magic that this just so happens to happen to him. The fact that he became a child again afterwards was proof that the human was not the monster because the monster was temporary. That was trite but what she said afterwards was worse. She told him that she wasn’t scared at all and that she loved him. What rotten lies.

She couldn’t have loved him less and she couldn’t have been terrified more. Takeru was revolted with certainty.

Every hour of every day, she checked to make sure that abominable bracelet was in place. She would draw the curtains tight and never let him out of her sight. It had been abhorrent but he had been a child. He hadn’t known any better or anything else but now that he did. He didn’t want anything akin to that ever again and he would rage against such sentiments in whatever form that they took before him.

Even if it was Kiku. Kiku who remembered his dislikes and wanted to engage in his likes and told him that he had a plum on his back. Kiku was, Takeru realised with an alien ease, the first person to recognise him and acknowledge the real him. Completely unlike others who had been in his life before who claimed to love him, like his mother.

Takeru buried his head in his hands. A guttural growl leaked out of between the crooked gaps of his teeth all wrong for his bizarre maw. He knew how those memories ended. Without closure. With his mother simply disappearing and how distant, faceless relatives told him, without knowing a thing about him, that his mother loved him above all.

“Stop it!” Takeru roared, thrashing around, swinging his arms, pounding his fists into the ground below. “I don’t want that kind of love forced on me! I don’t need it...”

He kept murmuring it over and over. I don’t need it. And at the edge of the shallows, where only her ankles were wet, Kiku did hear him. She stopped and she sucked in a breath. She looked over her shoulders, her eyes that were pooled with hot tears, and she surged forward. A force of nature in her own right, outclassing that of the downpour that continued torrentially over them.

Water skirted up the side of her as she ran back through the mire. She slipped and tripped, here and there, but was undeterred. She flung herself onto Takeru. He flinched as he felt her embrace the long spike of his bowed elbow. She buried her face in his grotesque skin. His head bent around with a snarl but Takeru couldn’t bring himself to say something as Kiku hid herself using his limb.

“Let’s go home…” Kiku murmured. “We have to go home.” She reefed her face off him, holding him tighter, her cheeks were flushed as she insisted with the utmost determination, “We have to go home together.”

Takeru blinked and he felt his heart waver.

“O-Otherwise, I have a feeling, Takeru-kun won’t come back home - to that house - ever again.” Kiku said.

She took a sharp breath and she could swear she could hear the front entranceway door of Shoichi’s place slam shut. She cringed. She just knew that Takeru was on the other side of that slam and she didn’t want him to be.

“Stop. Let go.” Takeru growled.

“No!” Kiku shouted, holding him tighter.

“Don’t you get it?!” Takeru snarled.

“No!” Kiku yelled. “No, I don’t get it.”

“Let go of me!” Takeru howled.

Takeru pulled back his arm. His head reared back, maw snapping, teeth glinting, and he hoped to forcibly rip Kiku off him but as he flailed about, Kiku held on. Her legs lolled about, straightly, as she held on for dear life to his arm. She whimpered, afraid, but trying to be brave. He slammed her into the ground, belly first and the blow winded her. She sputtered in the aftermath and Takeru glared. Fierce and vermillion.

Still face planted, Kiku mumbled, “I’m scared…”

Takeru’s ears pricked up. He had almost missed it but he heard her. Her tiny little voice rife with terror. And despite that terror, Kiku began to get up. Her hands trembled but she still tried to hold onto the monster that was Takeru for anchorage.

“R-Right now, even though… even though I hear your voice, it doesn’t sound like you.” Kiku murmured. She shook as she got to her knees, still too weak to properly face Takeru. “Y-You’re in a form I’ve never seen before a-and it scares me.”

Takeru stared. His lips were pulled back in an uncertain and feral way, and Kiku embraced him through it. Gladdened that he had stilled.

“But I want to… I want to understand you now.” Kiku said. “Just like you listen to me when I’m discouraged,” she thought of how they had studied together after that big test had wiped them both out and how their marks improved together afterwards, she thought of how Takeru, and Ryoken, had gone to collect her from her grandfather’s house after the renovations and how it felt so wrong until she had seen him again, and finally she thought of New Years, sitting on the rooftop with him, making wishes on the stars and the skylines, “I want you to tell me when you are scared or hurting, or when you’re feeling weak, and let me worry about you! B-Because I want to keep living together with you.”

Takeru examined Kiku through the lens of his slit eye. She trembled, soaked with water and mud, and she looked pathetic. But she was being honest. His heart fluttered somewhere within the arcane structure of this body’s form.

“I want to eat with you, study with you, and worry about you… All those things, I want to continue to live with you.” Kiku sobbed as she embraced Takeru’s malformed arm. Her tears dripped down her face, mingled with the raindrops.

Kiku trembled as she held onto him, a bawl in the back of her throat. Her words, though quiet, managed to silence the world. The clouds above were grey and Takeru stilled with shock as he listened to her impassioned pleading. And there was a change, almost imperceptible but Kiku felt it. She looked up.

Takeru, naked as the day he was born, stood on his own two legs and he spoke not facing her, “It would have been fine if she didn’t love me at all…”

Kiku was slow as she clutched onto Takeru’s lithe arm, he was wet with the slick of the rain. Kiku felt a little bit confused but elated too, with relief, as she looked at him, unacknowledged. Tears pooled in her eyes but she wasn’t crying, even if the muscles of her throat felt soggy and thick.

“Or if she was scared of me…” Takeru continued, almost aimlessly but there was a shine to his voice, as though he were having a divine revelation about his relationships with others. “Being scared would have meant that she was seeing the ugly part of me. But Mom used to love to avoid looking at me. She avoided thinking about it - and I think she avoided thinking about the ugly parts of Dad, too, or maybe I was just the straw that broke her back…” Takeru began to sink, he sat down and Kiku joined him on her knees, still clutching onto him because she wanted him to feel some comfort in her fingertips. “But I wanted her to think it through with me, to worry with me. I wanted to tell her all the painful things but I never could.” His eyes began to water, his lilac-grey irises were glassy. “I wanted to live in the present with her.”

Kiku reached out and cupped Takeru’s face. He was finally able to look at her. Her hair had become untied and was in waves and clumps of cobalt black. Her golden eyes were huge with concern and worry, edged with lingering tears.

Takeru swallowed a lump in his throat. He had always thought… He had always thought nobody would want to say those things to him, with him. See him as a monster and see him as a cat and seeing him as him as well. Takeru’s heart trembled and his head throbbed. He began to slump forward, into Kiku’s arms.

For a second, Kiku thought she was going to be kissed but then Takeru hugged her. One arm cupping her back and the other taking her hand as his body, weak and wracked with exhaustion, all but crashed into her. He nuzzled his face against Kiku’s, he heard a tiny gasp and then a little, thank goodness, under her breath. And in that goodness, Takeru felt a sublime peace that he had never truly known until this moment right here in the mud and mire.

“Kiku…” he whispered to her, grateful. He felt her flowing tears on his bare skin.

The sky began to lighten. Clouds began to part for a feeble but kind sunshine that illuminated the drear of it all and Kiku held Takeru in her arms. He slept, a calico cat, white and ginger, in her arms and he dreamed softly, of dark nightmares melting back to sweet dreams as he was taken home by Kiku.

#ina-bon #ina bon #entrustshipping #yugioh vrains #vrains #yugioh #takeru homura #kiku kamishirakawa #writing tag #merry writes stuff #i hope you enjoy!!!! <333333

17 notes · View notes

cesabutterflywrites · 4 years

Text

525,600 Minutes

Summary: Logan meets Patton in a coffee shop after losing his connection to the stars. What follows is a year of their life, and their first seasons of love. Inspired by Seasons of Love from the musical RENT.

Word Count: 15,708

Rating: Strong T for mild cursing, mentions of sexual intimacy

Ship: Logicality

Characters: Logan/Logic, Patton/Morality, Thomas Sanders(brief), Virgil Sanders(brief)

Warnings: Suicide mention, self deprecation, anxiety, alcoholism, arguing

A/N: This was supposed to be 4k words and a little short oneshot. The infamous fic I’ve been complaining about for a while. It was supposed to be a little fluff piece to distract from my Prince in the Storm fic. Well, Patton and Logan had other ideas. I put a lot of effort into this, but it has been a few years since I’ve written anything so it will be a bit rough in some areas. I hope you enjoyed and feedback is encouraged. This is not a multichapter. Also on Ao3. Song Logan sings is Irresistible by One Direction.

525,600 minutes

Summer

It was a hot August evening. Despite the darkness of the night, the temperature outside was still a good seventy degrees Fahrenheit. There was a hint of a breeze in the air, however, that made it more bearable to go stargaze.

One thing Logan loved about summer nights were the clear skies; perfect for seeing the sky with its navy hues of blue and purple. He also enjoyed how the grass in his backyard wasn’t muddy from rain. It was still soft enough to lay on (with a blanket underneath him, of course).

Summer nights were for relaxing. The heat hardly made it easy to do anything productive. Even less invigorating activities such as reading, sitting at a desk, and taking a shower ended with him still drenched with sweat. While it was grimy, dirty, and made his skin feel uncomfortable...he also loved it. The heat swelling in his face gave him the feeling of life that he had lost over the course of cooler months.

Knowing it was hot outside, he was prepared in adequate attire. He did not want to dirty any presentable clothes with grass stains, so he wore what would be deemed as ‘house wear’. A white tank top that was a bit too small from many times in the dryer, some denim shorts with a belt. It was not his preferred way to dress, in fact he avoided thinking about what would happen if any of his friends saw him in those clothes.

When the blanket was laid down, Logan rested his head in his hands and looked at the stars. Of course, he could name the constellations that were popular. Orion, Ursa Major, et cetera. However when Logan needed a break from recalling fact, when he needed a moment to just exist within himself, he made his own constellations. That was what summer was for. Summer was for retreat. Time away from work, away from stress, away from...people.

That night, however, he struggled to come up with an image. His mind kept swirling with questions about the stars. What would it mean to touch a star? What would it feel like to see the stars in someone’s eyes? Everyone around him in the summer were focused on romantic endeavors. His colleagues would take about their dates to the boardwalk, to an ice cream parlor, to a swimming pool. Summer seemed to be the time where everyone found someone.

Logan took a deep breath in, tasting the hot moisture of the night and letting it stick to his lungs. He was not blind to the fact that he was thirty years old without ever having a...person. Not that he didn’t desire anyone, he just never found someone he ‘clicked’ with. Of course, there was no point in setting himself up for heartbreak when he saw there wasn’t a stable enough connection. Most times it wasn’t bothersome, most times he could be distracted by his work and the stars. For as long as he could remember, the stars were better companions than other species. They listened to his concerns without him ever needing to verbalize them. They heard his deepest wishes, tasted his loneliness when it was unbearable.

So what was different about that night? He could see the stars but it was as if they had hung up on him. It was as if they abandoned him. When all he sought was some relaxation, he was met instead with isolation.

He closed his eyes, hoping that by doing so the galaxies above him would shift just enough for him to pick up the connection.

When he opened them, there was a bright sun and the sky was a light blue. He brought his hand up to shield himself from the sudden burst of light to his eyes. His skin was sweaty, and a bit red. His tank top stuck to him and his shorts chafed against his thighs.

He hadn’t meant to fall asleep. Perhaps the warmth of the night had acted like a blanket and helped him drift off.

With a sigh, he slowly pulled himself off the ground to make his way indoors. He didn’t want to bother with the blanket, what he needed was a cold shower and some aloe vera lotion. After that, an iced coffee.

~~~~

The coffee shop wasn’t very crowded when he arrived. Most everyone had already grabbed their drinks and were enjoying the sun. Logan wasn’t too burned by his outdoor slumber, the only place he felt sore was his face.

When he got to the counter he noticed the barista was new. Chocolate brown locks curling over a tan face with a splatter of freckles along soft cheekbones and a button nose. The man made the standard uniform of white shirt, black pants, and a blue apron seem like something out of a magazine.

Logan felt his face heat up even more. It was uncomfortable to blush under his burn, but not unwelcome.

“Hi there! Welcome to Skye’s Cafe. What would you like to order today?” the barista asked, and Logan nearly fainted. His voice was filled with such enthusiasm. Logan hadn’t thought it possible that he could hear sunlight.

“Uh-I would like a, um,” Logan needed to think. What had he come in for again? Where was he? His skin was on fire from the intense waves of immediate attraction pulling him in.

“Don’t worry, take your time,” the man encouraged, “There’s no one behind you so don’t feel rushed.”

Logan glanced behind him and was brought back to earth. He shook his head as if the feelings that overcame him were nothing more than fleeting thoughts.

Turning back to the handsome figure behind the register, he gave his order as casually as he could, “Iced coffee, light cream and sugar.”

The barista cheerfully nodded as he put the order into the register. Next he grabbed a cup and sharpie, “Name?”

Logan’s throat closed but he managed to get out, “Logan”

“Logan, what a great name. Mine is Patton!”

Another wave of emotion crashed over Logan. Patton. Suddenly he knew the name of God’s most perfect angel. Fire licked at his feet and he struggled to keep his balance.

“Thank you, uh, Patton. Are you new here?” Logan asked, noticing the nervous tone in his own voice.

Patton didn’t seem to notice the edge in Logan's voice. He walked off to start making the drink but he answered, “Yes I am, today is actually my second day out of training.”

Logan didn’t have a response other than ‘hm’. Patton had gotten the drink ready quicker than any of the other baristas had before. Logan grabbed the drink from the counter and indulged in one more glance at Patton’s face. They both exchanged a smile.

“That was the quickest anyone made my drink,” Logan blurted out.

A pink blush crept up underneath the freckles on Patton’s face. “Oh, thank you. Everyone has been saying that today. I guess I’m a quick learner.”

“Well, thank you. I hope to see you more often,” Logan internally chastised himself. He didn’t mean to overstep his bounds.

Patton blushed even harder, “Well, at the end of the week I’ll know what my schedule is for sure. Maybe after that I could tell you.” Patton’s eyes went wide when he realized the implication of what he said, “O-of course, so you can have your drink made quicker!”

Logan smirked at the flustered barista. It was a comfort to know he wasn’t the only one flustered. “Then I’ll hope to see you when you know.”

Patton only nodded in response, then the bell rang signaling another customer walking in. “Well, it was nice talking to you Logan. I hope you enjoy your drink.”

Logan nodded then went to sit down at his usual table in the corner near the window. It was the perfect lighting for reading a book. He took a sip of his drink and jolted a bit.

So this is what heaven tastes like

~~~~

A few weeks went by, August was nearly over, and Logan made it a point to go get coffee 10 minutes before Patton was due for a break. They had gotten to know each other quite well, though Logan realized the man of sunshine could be a bit...eccentric.

“Hey, teach, wanna hear a joke?” Patton asked as he sat across Logan.

Logan sighed. Mostly out of habit, he knew whatever joke came out of those pink lips would fill him with joy. “Sure, go ahead Patton.”

Patton started giggling, barely able to start. Logan’s heart pounded to the rhythm of the sound. “Okay, okay. What,” Patton grinned at Logan with a raised eyebrow, “do you call a pan from mars?”

Logan’s eyebrows scrunched, wondering what the punchline would be. “There are no pans on Mars that we know of.” He responded.

“Marzipan!” Patton shouted before dissolving into a mess of giggles. His arms wrapped around himself in an attempt to hold himself together.

Logan pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. “That one didn’t even make sense, Pat.”

It took a few seconds for Patton to compose himself to respond. Logan felt a smile tug at his lips at how absolutely precious the man in front of him was. “It doesn’t have to make sense, that’s why it’s so funny!”

Logan let out a small laugh, “Whatever you say, Sunshine.” Logan’s eyes widened immediately. He hadn’t meant to call Patton Sunshine, it just slipped out.

Patton looked stunned for a minute, before he broke out into a wide grin. “What did you call me?”

“I- I didn’t mean… I hadn’t meant to- I’m so sorry I don’t know where that came from.” Logan put his head in his hands to hide his blush and shame from Patton.

“Hey Logan, look at me,” Patton requested softly. Logan just shook his head in his hands, refusing.

He didn’t hear Patton move, but suddenly there was a warmth sitting next to him. Gentle, soft hands wrapped themselves around Logan’s wrists and tugged them down. Logan was a slave to the request, fire spreading up his veins and causing his heartbeat to fill his head and ears. He looked at Patton to see a light in those puppy brown eyes he had come to quickly fall for.

“It’s okay, I like the nickname. I’m flattered that you think so highly of me, cause...well I…” Patton looked out the window behind Logan, a twinkle in his eyes and red starting to creep up along his cheekbones. “I think pretty highly of you, too.”

Logan couldn’t hear his thoughts, or perhaps he had none. Words had escaped his mouth and mind as they had the first time he laid eyes on Patton. “How much?” he asked. He needed to know if Patton, too, felt the fire. He needed to know if Patton felt the pull as well.

The curly haired, freckled, sunshine man looked into Logan’s eyes. There was the fire. The flames Logan had felt consuming him all these weeks; they came from those eyes.

Patton moved a hand to reach up to Logan’s face. He waited for Logan to nod before making contact. Logan felt himself lean into Patton’s hand. It was almost as if those hands were sculpted to hold him. Or maybe Logan’s face was made to be the clay Patton were to use to his own will. Patton didn’t seem to know it, but he held all of the power over Logan.

“I think you are so smart. You may seem annoyed by my humor, but I can tell that you secretly enjoy it. You have pretty blue eyes that make me feel like I’m in a refreshing pool of water. You seem guarded with everyone except me, and I feel that it is an honor that is rarely given. So, I think very highly of you.” Patton’s voice was low for once, his words sounded as if he had rehearsed what he needed to say.

Logan could no longer bear it. He was too warm, his throat was dry, he needed to do something to release and cease the heat. He grabbed Patton’s face and pulled him in for a kiss.

Fireworks exploded in his stomach as Patton kissed him back. The world disappeared until all that was left was them. Logan’s first kiss, the first kiss he had been skeptical would ever come for thirty years, made all that time worth it. He felt himself smile against the soft lips of his new love. They pulled apart, grinning at each other like fools.

“Sunshine, how do you feel about stargazing?”

525,600 minutes

Autumn

October had come to an end, and Patton was the happiest man on Earth. Autumn was his favorite season. It was the time of year for hot chocolate, warm soup, cozy blankets, and snuggles. The air cooled, breezes picking up orange leaves and scattering them along the ground. They crunched under his feet. Rain fell from gray clouds, making him feel like he needed to dance. Well, maybe his reason to dance was more than just that it was raining.

Things were going great with his new boyfriend, Logan. They had been going steady since the first time they kissed at the end of August. He had been working at Skye’s coffeeshop for about two months and was recently offered a raise for how much business he was bringing in. He wasn’t quite sure what she had meant by that, but he didn’t really mind. Skye was an amazing boss to work with, and started to become an amazing friend. Patton loved making friends. He just loved making people happy.

He had been on his way to Logan’s house when the rain started to really pour. He had forgotten to bring an umbrella with him before he left work, so he started jogging so he could get to the warm embrace of the house and Logan’s arms quicker.

He had reached the door when the downpour had started to turn into a storm. His knuckles knocked on the dark wood door to the house he had come to spend every evening at for a month. He rubbed his arms and bounced in an attempt to warm himself up. Despite the cold and wet, he couldn’t help but feel happy.

Every day he felt laughter bubbling up in his chest as he looked forward to seeing his wonderful boyfriend. All he could think about every day was the way Logan’s lips twitched when he was trying to hide a smile. How he would tip his glasses up and glance away when he felt extra smart. How he would blush whenever he caught Patton staring. He always looked forward to spending what precious moments he could with his most bestest boyfriend ever.

Logan answered the door. Patton’s smile wavered as he took in Logan’s appearance. His hair was disheveled, his glasses were missing, and all he was wearing was a robe and boxers. There were dark bags under his eyes, and his lips were curved down in a frown.

“Oh my God, what happened Logan?” Patton gasped. He had never seen Logan look this unkempt.

Logan looked confused until he seemed to process Patton’s question. “Oh, nothing Patton. What are you doing here?” The whiskey on his breath wafted into Patton’s nostrils. Oh.

Patton didn’t answer as he tried to step past Logan inside. Logan tried to resist him but he stumbled. Patton scanned his eyes across the living room and couldn’t believe what he saw. There were books strewn about as if they had been tossed around. The couch was covered in tissues. There was a whiskey bottle on it’s side resting on the coffee table. Try not to think about it, Patton.

He jumped as Logan slammed the door. “What are you doing here, Pat?” Logan sounded...angry.

Patton turned to look at Logan. His blue eyes were bloodshot and puffy, as if he had been crying. Patton walked closer but Logan backed away. “Don’t.”

Tears formed in Patton’s eyes but he wouldn’t let them fall. He needed to know what was going on, so he kept walking forward until Logan was backed against the wall. He was a little shorter than his boyfriend, but that didn’t make his stare any less intense.

“Logan, Starlight, what’s wrong?” he asked softly. He tried to ignore the sob that was threatening to escape his throat. The cold fear stabbed his heart.

Logan put his hand on Patton’s shoulder to push him away, but he was too weak. His head lolled sideways as he tried to form a response. “Nuffin’” was all that he came up with. He then slid down the wall to sit on the floor. “Standing hard.”

Patton took a deep breath in to calm himself. He knew Logan needed him, so he shoved his worries and temptations aside and sat next to Logan on the floor. Once again he asked, "What happened?"

This time Logan didn't try to push Patton out. He leaned his head onto Patton's shoulders and cried. The sounds rang in Patton's ears like a twisted version of the bells in Logan's laugh. Patton's heart beat erratically in his chest like usual, except this time for much more heartbreaking reasons.

All he could do was put his arm around his love and rub his shoulders for comfort. Logan calmed a bit in response to the touch, as if Patton touching him gave him enough clarity to speak through the burning alcohol in his blood.

"A, uh, a student of mine passed away yesterday." Logan whispered, "Suicide," he choked out.

Patton suddenly saw why Logan seemed destroyed. He was a fairly new teacher, and chose to work at the middle school. He hadn't dealt with a student death before, especially one so young.

Patton felt the ice in his heart melt away from the empathy he held for his love. He unfortunately was very familiar with the beast of suicide.

So maybe that's what gave him the right words to say, "Starlight, you can't hold yourself at fault for the death of another. You did what you could, and in the end you lost a person close to you. However that doesn't lessen the worth of your efforts. Sometimes," tears fell down Patton's face like the rain outside,"Sometimes it feels like we're being swallowed whole. That simple things like getting out of bed in the morning is the same as jogging for six miles with no water or food. No matter the love we receive, sometimes our minds are filled with so much darkness we filter it all out."

Logan looked up at Patton. Even while intoxicated he understood what Patton meant by 'we'."Are you suicidal too?"

The question hung in the air between them. Lighting flashed through the windows and thunder followed suit. The silence between them was amplified by the electricity in the air. Between them a puddle of truth that Patton had to step into in order to reach the next step in their relationship.

"Why aren't you answering me?" Logan pleaded, tears once more flowing. His voice was gravel. He clung Patton's shirt in his fists and pulled himself to sit in front of him.

Patton's eyes were wide. Hiding the pain was always better. Making others smile was the only way to keep from adding more pain in this world. Yet he saw that with each second of silence he was hurting Logan more.

He decided to try a new way of soothing another's pain. "I was, as a child. I had a lot going on. I made an attempt at one point, even. But I survived. And now I’m glad I did, because I have you.”

Neither of them could speak after that, for there were no words. The two of them instead used their bodies to speak. Patton rubbing Logan’s back in small circles said ‘I love you’. Logan nuzzling into Patton’s chest while crying said ‘it hurts too much’. Logan taking Patton’s hand to move to the couch to cuddle meant ‘thank you’. Patton petting Logan’s hair said ‘You’re welcome’.

Logan kissing Patton’s thigh before falling asleep whispered ‘I love you too’.

~~~~

“I want you to accompany me to Thanksgiving dinner with my family.” Logan blurted one cloudy afternoon.

They had decided to go for a walk in the park by the coffee shop. Patton had forgotten his umbrella again, but Logan anticipated this, and brought an extra one. They had been walking in comfortable silence, taking in the image of the trees bare of their leaves. The world looked more toned down, which in a way calmed Patton. He loved the gray tones of the clouds in the sky, he loved the pumpkin patches, he loved the leaves, he loved the smell of rain.

Most of all, he freaking loved Logan in a scarf and jacket.

“Uh, what?”

“I want you to come with me to visit my family for Thanksgiving.” Logan repeated. The blush on his cheeks seemed to be deeper than being from just wind chill.

“Oh, um…” Patton was at a loss for words. Of course he wanted to go, but past experiences had told him that meeting the family wasn’t a good idea. “I don’t know…”

Insecurity crept it’s way into Patton’s mind. His exes had always been interested in him until he interacted with their families. He always told a joke that fell flat, always got too confused, always said something wrong. Always… did something wrong. However, he was a different person now. Plus he loved Logan so much...he just wasn’t ready to lose the love of his life through his own stupidity, or possibility of stupidity.

He obviously had been too quiet, because Logan stopped walking to look at Patton, his head tilting to the side in a way that tugged at Patton’s heart strings. Logan looking inquisitively made Patton feel important. When he puzzled Logan it wasn’t because he was a ditz, it was because Logan found him fascinating. The look on his face made Patton want to double check that his fears were unfounded.

“I mean, are you sure? What if I say something embarrassing?” Patton looked down at his shoes.

Logan lifted Patton’s chin up. Cool blue eyes chilled the heat in his heart. He felt his breathing get steadier with the solidity that was Logan. With one simple touch he felt roots planting into the ground beneath them, intertwining their souls to grow together forever. No wind could shake them. No storm could knock them down. In that moment, Patton knew there was nothing that could make Logan stop loving him. He also knew that he felt the same way.

“Sunshine, nothing you could do would make me unsure of how right you are for me,” Logan confirmed.

He cupped Patton’s cheek with his hand, “Your face was made to fit within my hands, for you are my world.”

His other had wrapped around Patton’s torso, pulling him closer, “Your body was made to be against my own; for you are my support.”

He leaned his forehead against Patton’s, “Your mind is the opposite of mine. Bubbly, bright, and full of light; for you are the sun to my moon.”

Logan’s lips brushed Patton’s, and he whispered, “Your lips were meant to kiss me; for your name is my prayer to the stars.”

Logan then kissed Patton in a way that felt different than their other kisses before. He felt as if he was being pulled back into his body. He embraced his love and they twirled, lips never parting. In that moment the two of them knew what it was to find what fit in the empty space within their souls.

Being grounded within Logan helped push his insecurities, fears, and old demons to the side. Logan’s arms were where he needed to be.

~~~~

Patton felt his nerves were firing up to the point he couldn’t sit still. It was a two hour drive to Logan’s brother’s house. Logan was in the driver’s seat, which was a good thing because Patton was too excited to concentrate. He was wearing his Thursday Best. He had an off-white cardigan on with a light blue polo underneath. He rubbed the palms of his hands over his freshly ironed khakis. It was the only thing he could do to stave off the need to bounce his leg.

“Hey, Starlight?”

“Yes, Sunshine?” Logan’s voice was deeper than normal. When he was concentrating on something else his voice dropped, and it sent butterflies flying in Patton’s stomach every time.

“Does your family know I’m coming with you?” Patton didn’t want to intrude

“They know I am bringing a plus one, yes.” Logan’s response was curt.

“A plus one?” Why did that leave a sick feeling in Patton’s stomach?

Logan sighed, his hands gripping the steering wheel tighter. “I...I never dated anyone before you.”

Patton was stunned. He was Logan’s first boyfriend, first partner...ever? He knew Logan didn’t have much experience with relationships...but he didn’t know ‘not much’ meant ‘none at all’. “Why not?” he couldn’t help but ask. Underneath his question was ‘why me, then?’

Logan took a minute to form a response. The downward curve of his mouth told Patton that his boyfriend was at a loss for words. He waited patiently for the response, choosing to look out the window at the rain falling around them in the daylight.

“I never found anyone who I saw as compatible enough to risk a relationship. I didn’t want to start something that was doomed to fail.” Logan blushed, “I guess you are the one for me, I never questioned my attraction to you. I never had to list the pros and cons of starting a courtship.”

“Awww...Starlight,” Patton cooed, “I love you too. Thank you for taking the risk, because if you hadn’t I don’t think I’d be here.” There was some truth to his statement, they were getting into the time of year when he started feeling…wrong.

“Well, obviously, it’s my car.”

Patton laughed, “Dad joke!”

Logan groaned, “You know I didn’t do it on purpose.”

They both chatted and sat in silence on and off until they pulled up to the house. Anxiety crawled up the back of Patton’s neck like a spider. He shivered. When Logan opened the door for him he didn’t move to get out.

“What’s wrong, my love?” Logan asked, concerned.

“I’m a bit..scared…” Patton admitted with a whisper.

“You’re going to be okay, I promise.” Logan reached his hand out. Patton had no choice but to climb out of the car to grab the steadying hand of his lover.

They walked hand in hand up the path to the house. The sun was starting to set, which set orange and pink hues splattered on the yellow house. If the family inside were as inviting as the outside of their home, Patton would have no problem fitting in.

Logan knocked on the door. His expression was his usual neutral stare. Patton felt Logan grip his hand tighter as the door was opened by a man who looked like Logan, but younger.

The man smiled and pulled Logan into a hug, which Logan stiffened in. “Good to see you, brother! Hey, who’s the friend?”

“Patton, this is my brother Thomas. Thomas this is my-” Logan paused, they hadn’t exactly had a chance to discuss how he’d be introduced. Evidently Logan decided for Patton and boldly proclaimed, “My boyfriend.”

Thomas’ eyebrows raised. “Well, that explains, um, a lot.” He then turned to Patton to shake hands with a bright smile, “It’s nice to have you over, Patton. Welcome, and come on in.”

They entered the house and the inside was even more inviting than the outside. The living room they had walked into had two couches. There was a fireplace in one corner, and in the other corner next to it was an entertainment center. The room’s walls were decorated in family photos, and some awards.

Patton was in awe, it was very different from his family’s home when he was growing up. The lighting was soft, warm and welcome. He loosened his grip on Logan’s hand just a bit. He felt more relaxed.

Not acknowledging the other people in the room, his eyes zoned in to the creature on the floor.

“Cat!” he loudly whispered to Logan.

Logan didn’t have time to form a response because conversations in the room ceased to look at them. Patton noticed that Logan was very uncomfortable, but he couldn’t figure out why. They all seemed like nice people.

An older woman came up to them, her smile was so bright. Patton couldn’t help but smile in return.

She reached out to shake hands. “I’m Matilda, Logan’s mom. Thank you for joining us.” Her voice reminded Patton of warm chocolate chip cookies. Her eyes were blue like Logan’s but more lively, full of stories and experiences only an older person would have.

He shook her hand back, “Nice to meet you, I’m Patton.”

There were a few more members of the family to meet. They formed a bit of a line to make introductions easier. There was Thomas, who owned the home. Matilda, Logan’s mom. One of Logan’s cousins, Jeff, and his teenage son, Virgil. Virgil didn’t introduce himself per se, he just looked up from his phone when he heard his name and waved halfheartedly. Patton didn’t take much offense, he remembered being a teenager once.

Once he had greeted everyone, he kept his eyes on the small cat perched on the windowsill. It was a lovely little long haired calico. Patton loved calicoes. He so badly wanted to go over and pet it, but he hadn’t thought to bring his allergy medication. He was so focused on the cat that he didn’t hear Logan say his name.

“Sunshine, Patton, Patton!”

“Oh, sorry Logan. What were you saying?” he asked, blushing a bit.

“We’re going to the dining room to eat dinner. Are you going to join us or continue staring at the cat?” Logan asked, seeming a bit annoyed.

Patton tried not to notice the edge in Logan’s voice, instead he chose to smile and put his hands on his hips. “I haven’t been introduced to the cat yet, Logan. It’s rude to go eat if I haven’t even met all the residents of the home.”

Logan rolled his eyes, “Sunshine, you’re allergic.” Patton took his hands up to his face to try to give his boyfriend the puppy eyes. He knew Logan couldn’t resist his pleading face for long.

Finally Logan gave in, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Her name is Surefoot.”

Patton turned back to the cat and cooed. “Awe, Surefoot, what a pleasure to meet you. Unfortunately I have to go eat, but it was mice to meet you meow.”

He giggled as Logan groaned. “Can we go eat now?”

Patton nodded and went to join the rest of the family. The dinner was amazing. He got along great with Logan’s family. They were so fun to hang out with. Thomas didn’t bat an eye when Patton denied a glass of wine. Matilda laughed with him over some embarrassing stories of Logan as a child. Even Virgil chimed in a few times.

After Logan had some food, his mood seemed to get a bit better. He also seemed relieved at his family’s easy acceptance of Patton. The two kept making side glances at each other. Thank you, Logan’s eyes seemed to say.

Patton’s kiss on his cheek was his way of saying you’re welcome.

525,600 Minutes

Winter

Logan hated winter.

He hated the snow, he hated driving in the snow, he hated the sun reflecting into his eyes from the snow. He hated the kids shouting around him when he went to work during a snowball fight. He hated when school got canceled last minute because of the snow.

This year was a bit different. Maybe there was one good thing about winter…

Patton wearing a Christmas sweater was adorable as hell.

School had been canceled, so he had decided to sleep in. He wasn’t expecting Patton to be over that day, at least not in the morning. So he was surprised when he had gotten to the bottom of the stairs to see his boyfriend in the kitchen. He smelled bacon, and heard sizzling that suggested pancakes were being made. Christmas music was being played softly from Patton’s phone. Patton was bouncing and doing a little dance while he stood at the stove, back turned to Logan.

Logan saw that Patton was wearing a light blue and white sweater, with cats and dogs on the back. Logan couldn’t help but burst with happiness. He strode to come up behind Patton and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend. Patton startled a bit but quickly relaxed against Logan. Logan peeked and saw that pancakes were being made. His stomach grumbled a bit, so he kissed Patton’s cheek and went to grab a piece of bacon.

“This is a nice surprise, Sunshine.” he commented.

Patton shrugged. “Well, I couldn’t sleep well, so I thought I’d bring some groceries over and make you breakfast. Especially since school was canceled.” Logan noticed Patton’s smile was bright but a bit..off.

“Why couldn’t you sleep?” Logan asked, paying extra attention to Patton’s face.

Patton stared down as he flipped the pancakes over. “No reason to be concerned, Starlight. Just couldn’t sleep is all.”

Logan had grown to notice Patton very well. He spent so much time looking at his love’s face. He had memorized every inch of Patton that he could. He knew how his curly hair puffed after waking up, he knew how his freckles nearly disappeared when he blushed, he knew all of Patton’s different smiles.

So obviously he knew when Patton was faking it.

There was a bit of silence between them. Patton put the pancakes on a plate, reached behind Logan for some bacon, and avoided Logan’s stare. He set the food down at the kitchen table and sat down. Smiling up at Logan he asked, “You gonna join me, Starlight?”

Logan frowned as he sat down. He normally enjoyed Patton’s cooking but he felt everything was..off. Odd. He didn’t want to push Patton, but he couldn’t keep his curiosity in for long.

They both ate in silence until Logan had had enough. “Okay, Patton, what’s wrong?”

Patton looked startled. “N-nothing, I just-”

“You couldn’t sleep, I know. But I also know that you like to avoid talking about your negative feelings. Please let’s just avoid the tooth pulling and just tell me.” Logan didn’t mean to sound mad. He was just frustrated.

Patton was flushed with embarrassment and looked down. “I-I just..” he closed his eyes, and Logan noticed a teardrop from Patton’s face, “I just was feeling really down last night. It was pretty bad, that happens a lot in the winter. I start feeling...bad, for some reason. Wrong.” he pushed his plate away and laid his head in his arms, sobbing, “I’m wrong!”

Logan felt his heart starting to splinter. He hadn’t meant to ruin the mood. He didn’t mean to push, and he certainly hated the idea of being the reason the love of his life was crying.

Logan gently stood up and knelt beside Patton. He didn’t ever imagine what he would do if his love had fallen apart. He laid his hand on Patton’s back and felt the wracking sobs vibrate within his own bones. His heart rate increased the the growing sorrow he felt for hurting the one person he needed. With each sob from Patton he felt his head spin even more.

“C’mon love, let’s move to the couch for a bit, yeah?” he pleaded. He needed to hold Patton in his arms and take all the burdens of the world away. He needed to hold his love steady enough in order to hold himself together.

Patton nodded and stood up with Logan’s help. Immediately, before Logan could see his face, he was embraced by Patton. The arms around his torso tortured him with their shaking. He held back his own tears and fears as he guided Patton to the sofa in the living room. Patton leaned his head on Logan’s lap and nuzzled. Logan would have found the action adorable if it weren’t for the fact that the reason why was still a mystery.

He didn’t exactly know what to do, so he followed his instincts. He started stroking Patton’s hair. He curled the locks around his fingers, loving the feel of soft chocolate smoothly running through his digits. He gazed down Patton’s body curled up on the couch. Even in the man’s sorrow, he still looked like the human representation of a precious cinnamon roll.

Logan wasn’t much of a singer, however he knew that Patton loved his voice so he started to hum softly,

“Don’t try to make me stay

Or ask if I’m okay

I don’t have the answer,”

Patton stopped shaking. Logan kept going, noticing his partner winding down.

“Don’t make me stay the night

Or ask if I’m alright

I don’t have the answer”

He felt Patton take a deep breath in, no longer sobbing. He noticed his sweatpants were a bit wet from his love’s tears. He didn’t care.

“Heartache doesn’t last forever

I’ll say I’m fine

Midnight ain’t the time for laughin’

When you say goodbye”

Patton turned to look up and Logan, his eyes red from crying. The normal bright stars looked burnt out. In the back of his mind, he noticed that they had left Patton’s glasses on the kitchen table.

“It makes your lips so kissable

And your kiss so missable

Your fingertips so touchable

And your eyes irresistible”

Logan’s heart burst open with light at the sight of Patton’s small smile. “Sorry, Starlight. I didn’t mean to ruin breakfast for you.”

Logan gently motioned for Patton to sit up. Once he had obliged, Logan took the soft hands of the person who had become his world from the moment they’d first met. He looked into the eyes that had held so much sunlight in the days prior. He shoved the questions he had about that to the side as he spoke, “Sunshine, you could never ever ruin anything for me.”

He reached out to cup Patton’s chin. “You are my Sunshine for a reason. You shed so much light in every room you walk into. You are so much stronger than me, you have an understanding of others that I will never have. You…” Logan couldn’t find the words to express how much Patton meant to him, so he thought he’d try a different way to use his lips to express his love.

He held Patton’s cheek and kissed. He tasted the salt and snot from Patton’s crying but he didn’t care. To him it was the way Patton tasted when he fell apart, and he loved every part of this man. He loved his smiles, his laughter, his jokes, his obsession with cats, he loved the light side. He also discovered that morning that he loved the dark side. He loved the tears, the sobs, the shaking, the shallow breathing. Even though the cries pierced his heart, even though he wanted to fall to his knees as freely as Patton’s tears, he still loved. Through the pain and cries, and snot and tears his love for Patton pushed him through his discomforts of emotions.

Patton groaned against his lips, the sound more guttural than he had been used to before. The next thing Logan knew, his lap was full of Patton. He was being straddled by a man in a sweater with animals on it. He was a bit shocked at Patton’s bravado. Normally they didn’t engage in such heated endeavors. They hadn’t gone very far...physically… in their relationship. Logan was never ready, and Patton was so patient.

This time, though, he felt ready. He felt a primal need build up inside of him. His hands slid under Patton’s sweater to feel the hot skin of Patton’s back. He whimpered when Patton moved his lips away from their kiss, then gasped in shock when Patton started to kiss along his neck. He gripped Patton’s hips as teeth nicked against his collarbone.

His head was swimming in desire for the man on top of him. He wanted to take him. He wanted to feel...that feeling. He wanted to take in his love’s touch. He wanted to touch all over Patton’s body and be touched in return. He wanted to feel the fire from the beginning of their courtship. He wanted to be doused in the flames of those chocolate eyes raking over his body. He wanted to melt against the body of the brightest thing he had ever seen. He wanted to go all the way so bad, but he couldn’t.

He listened to the voice of reason in his ear pointing out the possibility that Patton was trying to avoid the mess of the fit. He willed his fingers to pull away from Patton’s skin. He used all of his strength to gently push Patton away from his neck.

“Starlight, please,” Patton whined. Logan almost felt himself give in.

“No.” Logan denied. He noticed his voice was deeper than usual.

“Why not? I thought- I thought you wanted-” Patton’s eyes started to fill with rejection.

“I do!” Logan said quickly, not wanting to give the wrong impression, “I want it so bad. But not like this. Not under these circumstances.” He reached out to touch his love’s cheek, but was denied by Patton standing up.

“What, like you haven’t before?” Patton refused to look at him. Logan just sat on the couch stunned.

He needed Patton to look at him. “Sunshine, please, listen to me, come sit back down.”

Patton huffed, then sat back down, wrapping his arms around his knees. “Why not?”

Logan sighed, he hadn’t told Patton explicitly that he was a virgin. He had only mentioned that he hadn’t dated before. “I...I know you could tell that I don’t have much experience with intimacy. I know I’ve told you that there have been no others, but I meant it in all of the ways.”

An “Oh.” fell from Patton’s lips. “I’m sorry.”

Logan smiled. “It’s okay. I still want to, and I know I’m ready, but I need to know first…” Patton looked away, “What happened?”

His love sighed, “I...I told you a while ago that I had been suicidal as a kid, after your student passed away.” Logan flinched at the memory. He wasn’t proud of the way he responded to the death, and he didn’t exactly want the reminder of the empty desk at the back of his classroom. However he let Patton continue.

“I have seasonal depression. In the winter I can get a bit… down,” Logan nodded, understanding what Patton was saying, “Normally I have been able to handle it. For about two years I’ve been managing...but this winter is especially hard for some reason.”

Logan scooted closer to put his hand on Patton’s knee, encouraging him to continue, “I guess I really missed you last night, you know?” Oh, how Logan did know, “But I didn’t want to disturb your sleep last night. So I just pushed through it. I tried to stuff it down. I felt icky and gross, kinda like I do now.”

Logan smiled softly and said, “You’re still glorious to me.”

Patton smiled and let out a laugh, “Thank you. I needed to hear that.”

The conversation would have continued, if it weren’t for both of their stomachs growling for breakfast. They both laughed.

“Let’s try to have second breakfast, yeah?” Patton asked while standing up.

All Logan did was gaze after the retreating form of his partner, admiring the animals on his cute sweater.

~~~~

It was December 24th. Logan and Patton had decided to spend Christmas Eve and Christmas morning together. Patton was acting so bouncy it was nearly intoxicating. Logan wasn’t one to celebrate Christmas much, outside of going to his brother’s house for a family dinner. He never decorated outside of a small tree in the front window to give a feeling of participation with his neighbors for the holiday.

So it was a bit of a shock to come home to his living room resembling Santa’s workshop.

He had walked into the sight of garland strung along the staircase. There were figurines of angels, elves, santa claus, reindeer, and on the center of the coffee table was a small nativity scene.

The biggest shock of all was the tree in the window.

Patton was humming along to the music he had put on, and was stringing the lights along the bottom of the real, giant green tree. Patton was too distracted to notice that Logan had come in, which was a blessing because it meant that Logan could watch Patton shimmy around the tree, being his adorable self.

Patton swayed his hips while he sang. Once the lights were set, he reached into the box behind him and pulled out more garland. He had a smile on his face, and the soft glow on his face from the colored lights made it all the more miraculous.

He noticed the song Patton was singing along was a bit...well, it was certainly outdated.

“I really can’t stay,” Patton sang

“But baby it’s cold outside”, the singer on the music player responded.

Logan smirked as he quietly snuck up behind his love.

“I’ve got to go away,” Patton continued, oblivious to Logan’s presence behind him.

“But baby it’s cold outside,” Logan crooned deeply while wrapping his arms around Patton.

Patton yelped, and would have jumped if it hadn’t been for Logan’s strong grip around his waist. “Oh, Starlight, you scared me,” he let out a relieved giggle.

Logan rested his chin on Patton’s shoulder, giving a kiss onto the man’s neck. Patton must have been baking, cause he smelled like gingerbread. He was wearing the blue sweater again, the material soft on Logan’s face. Logan couldn’t help but run his nose up and down the smooth flesh. He left kisses wherever he could. Patton doing this grand gesture for him only reinforced his need.

He had a craving for every bit of light Patton exude. Patton’s laughter was his drug, he was in bliss at the sight of that crooked smile. The freckles were constellations in shapes Logan could never imagine to exist. The stars had disconnected from him that summer evening because they knew their time was up. Their beauty was no match for the man now squirming in his grip.

“I’m going to pull you away from your decorating for a bit, is that satisfactory?” Logan whispered. He took the pleased whimper in response as a yes.

He turned Patton around and gave the most passionate kiss he could muster. He was ready. He was ready and the lights were perfect. The love was in the air, so thick he was drowning. They nearly knocked some of the decoration boxes down trying to make it up the stairs. Logan didn’t know where his new bravado was coming from. It was as if he were under a spell. The fire was back in his veins, roaring louder and hotter than he could bear.

The cold outside was no match for the heat in his cheeks as he pulled Patton onto his bed with him. They had both slept next to each other before. He knew that this time was different. This was more. This was further than he had ever thought he would go in his life.

Before Patton, he was content. Before Patton, he was fine without having a companionship outside of friendship. Before Patton, he could breathe on his own. Before Patton, he had only the bare minimum to get through life. Before Patton, he only needed the stars in his eyes in order to stave off loneliness. Before Patton, he was incomplete.

With Patton, he knew what it was like to step into the sunlight. With Patton, he was never alone. With Patton, he had warmth in his bed for the winter. With Patton, even his home reflected the utter joy he felt every second he spent thinking about his love. With Patton, he didn’t need the stars. With Patton, he wasn’t alone. With Patton, he was in love.

They spent that night blending their bodies into each other. Logan had no idea how he had got on without those feelings in the past. With each new touch he put on Patton, he forgot his before. Patton kissed all the cold away from every inch of his skin. They both knew what warmth in the winter felt like, and Logan never wanted to leave his love’s side ever again. They had reached a level of pure intimacy that he knew would destroy his soul if it disappeared.

After he reached the highest of heights, Patton pulled him back down to earth to lay on his shoulder. They stayed in bed for a while, tracing their fingers over each other’s bodies. He gazed at the sweaty brown curls resting on his chest. They laid in peaceful quiet, taking in the first breaths of fresh air since their first kiss.

“I never finished decorating the tree, Starlight, and tomorrow’s Christmas.” Patton whispered, looking up at Logan.

Logan couldn’t help but grin at the concern on his, now lover’s face. “Well, there’s always next year to have the chance to finish.”

Patton sighed with a dreamy smile, sitting up to peck a kiss on Logan’s nose. “Well, then I’m going to head to the shower to get cleaned up, wanna join me?”

Logan shook his head, “I need some water before I can even consider leaving the bed.”

Patton brought him a glass of water, then walked to the door before looking over his shoulder to get one last glance at Logan, “Merry Christmas, Starlight.”

“Merry Christmas Sunshine.”

~~~~

Logan never understood the meaning behind the phrase ‘time flies when you’re having fun’. Frankly, he never was able to imagine how time would feel differently passing depending on the activities. Did time move slower for others when they were sad? Did the seconds on the clock tick at a greater speed than he was able to hear? Had everyone been privy to a secret of the way time worked that he was being kept in the dark of? Evidently, yes, because he was surprised that the New Year was just one day away.

Patton had made the plans for the holiday, but was keeping them a secret. It was a miracle he was able to hold it in, because he was so excited every time Logan brought it up. As New Year’s Eve drew closer, it was like Patton was literally vibrating constantly. Though it was endearing the first few days, eventually it was pushing a button on Logan that he didn’t understand. Perhaps it was because he did not like being kept in the dark.

“Hey, Starlight! You ready for tomorrow night?” Patton called as he walked into the door of Logan’s house.

“I don’t know how I could be ready, since I don’t know what our plans are.” Logan snarked.

Patton laughed. “Well, someone is a grumpy gus. Don’t worry, I know you’ll love it.”

Logan just rolled his eyes and pulled out his phone, hoping for a distraction from his heightened annoyance. He didn’t want to hurt Patton’s feelings, he genuinely wanted to be excited, but surprises were hard for him to come to grips with. His family had stopped bothering to surprise him with birthday parties by the time he was five because he would always figure it out.

So why couldn’t he think of a possible way Patton would surprise him?

His boyfriend was such a wild card, he noticed with the seasonal depression being intense it meant that Patton was even more...emotional. Not that he minded, it was just a bit too much for him sometimes. He felt so guilty. He knew it wasn’t Patton’s fault, and truth be told he noticed the vitamin D supplements he gave to his love for Christmas were starting to make a difference.

Patton sat next to him, a dreamy smile on his face. “All I could think about at work was your handsome face.”

Logan huffed, “I hope it didn’t hinder your work.”

“No, it didn’t…” Patton trailed off, “Is something bothering you, Logan?”

Logan put his phone on the coffee table and sighed to himself. It was probably a good idea to get his feelings off of his chest in case it interfered with his reaction to the surprise in store for him. He leaned back to look at Patton, who seemed really nervous. That made it more difficult to form the words he needed.

“I love you, you know this, right?” Patton nodded. “I have been feeling...more irritable lately.”

“Why?” Patton’s eyes were watery already.

“Nothing you’ve done, per se. I just don’t really like surprises, so when you’re reminding me of it constantly it’s been a bit, well, grating on my patience.” He eyed Patton warily, waiting for an emotional response.

Instead, Patton just deflated. “I’m sorry,” he put his face in his hands, “I just wanted to give you a good New Year’s, but the plans weren’t set in stone, and so it was a surprise so I didn’t get your hopes up. I only just got confirmation today...and, and, and,” Patton curled up in a ball, still hiding his face. Though Logan didn’t need to see his lover’s face in order to tell he had started crying.

He took a deep breath, trying to ignore the urge to roll his eyes. He gently laid a hand on Patton’s knee. He reminded himself that winter would be almost over, this season would pass, and he shouldn't be so selfish to ignore his lover’s mental health problems.

“Sunshine, I’m sorry,” he truly was, “I guess I was wrong to assume you were trying to annoy me.”

“Annoy you?!” Patton’s head jerked up, heartbreak starting to form in his eyes.

“No! No, that's not what I-” Logan tried to say.

Patton stood up quickly, backing away. Betrayal took over his face like the dark shadow of an eclipse. Immediately Logan felt colder. Freezing. He knew what was happening. He was going to be put in the dark if he made one wrong move.

This moment came in every couple’s life. The highs crash into a low. The clear skies were replaced with stormy pain. It was the first test to see if they would make it.

“Patton, Sunshine, please sit down, I’m sorry,” he pleaded.

Patton smiled, but it was empty. He shook his head, dismissing Logan’s apology. “I should have known. I should have known you were no different from the others.”

Logan stood up. “Please don’t say that,” he whispered, “please don’t.”

His lover wiped the tears off of his face. “I’m sorry. I guess I thought I was better with you. I guess I thought I could be different with you. I guess I thought,” he tried to close his eyes to stop the tears, “I guess I thought I’d get to do what I wanted tomorrow night.”

Patton made his way to the door. Logan moved as quickly as he could. His tears fogged up his glasses but he didn’t care. He caught Patton’s sleeve and he got down on his knees. I can’t lose him, he thought to himself.

“I can’t lose you Sunshine. Please don’t leave. Please, I’m sorry I used the wrong word. I promise you weren’t-” he let the tears fall, exposing his heart, “I love you.”

Patton looked down at him. The fire in his eyes that Logan was used to was burning him, and for once it was painful. It wasn’t the comforting warmth he was used to, it wasn’t the fiery passion he needed. It was painful. His skin was burning and it was at the hands of Patton.

He leaned his forehead against his lover’s hand. “Please. I’m sorry. Please. I’m sorry.” he repeated over and over, a prayer for mercy.

Patton opened the door, took his hand from Logan, and pulled something out of his jacket pocket. “I’m going to go for a walk. Here’s your stupid... annoying, surprise.” he tossed a small box into Logan’s hands and slammed the door.

The small item burned a hole through his hands. He stayed there, on his knees, waiting for Patton to return like the loyal dog he was. He couldn’t believe what he’d done. One slip up, one misspoken word, one poorly timed comment- and his heart was shattered.

Tears were flowing freely from his face. This was the pain he had tried to avoid for thirty years. For years, he avoided attraction and courtship, in fear of what he was feeling. Kneeling at the door, waiting for Patton’s return.

He looked down at the box. It was a small black box wrapped in dark blue ribbon. He undid the ribbon, lifted the lid, and put a hand to his mouth to keep himself from screaming.

Inside the container was another box, obviously from a jeweler. Logan knew it’s contents before he opened it. He still needed to know. He needed Patton’s love and this was the closest he could get. Holding his breath in, he lifted the lid of the jewelers box. Inside was the most beautiful ring he had ever seen. Three deep blue sapphires set against a sterling silver band.

All thoughts of how early it was in their relationship never came. Just barely over four months seemed perfect to him in that moment. This ring gave him hope-hope that Patton would return to him to hear his answer. He lifted it out of the box with shaky, pale fingers. There was an inscription.

My Starlight

Logan tried to put the ring on his ring finger, it was a bit too loose, of course, Patton didn’t know his ring size. So he put it on his middle finger. It fit just fine. So close, but so so far.

He moved himself to the couch, still staring at the ring. He whispered a prayer to any of the stars above that Patton would return.

The stars must have burnt out in the night, because he never did. That night, or the next. So with new heartbreak came a new year.

525,600 Minutes

Spring

Springtime was usually a sign to Patton that the dark days were over. The sun making its way out of the storm clouds was the message to him that he survived. Every flower bud told him he made it past the winter. This year, however, he didn’t respond. The season coming in was a lie.

It was just another early spring sunrise peeking into his window. It was February 7th. One more week until Valentine’s day. If he had just not been so quick to overreact, he’d be where he belonged. Waking up to the bare bit of sun with the only person who would enjoy it enough. Instead, he woke up in his apartment. His dark, messy, lonely apartment.

Like he had done every morning since the mistake, he went to his fridge to search for a beer. He had been sober for two years when he had met...him. He had finally gotten a job that he was good enough at to stick with. He had finally had all the pieces of the puzzle complete. Perhaps he jinxed himself by trying to rush into the next step of his life. Maybe by buying the ring so soon, he had set in stone the doom he knew would come.

That’s why he walked out. He knew he had already corrupted the only good thing in his life. He was so disgusted with himself. So...icky. He felt wrong. That day he cemented that fact with slipping up. Without Logan, without his steady presence, he kept slipping further down the rabbit hole.

Work had stopped calling him to come in, and after two weeks he got an email saying that he had been terminated, and to come in to collect his last paycheck. He never did. Let Skye keep her money.

However, he was disappointed when he was confronted with an empty fridge. He used the last little bit of his savings to cover rent. He felt anxiety grip his chest. He knew he needed to go pick up that check after all.

He didn’t bother changing into suitable clothes. His clothes were all dirty anyways. He just put his cardigan on over his pajamas. Grabbing his wallet and phone, he left.

The light outside was too bright. The false reminder that hope was right around the corner. He put his hand up to block the sun. To block the truth. To block the facts that he was screwing up royally.

He always walked as much as he could. He did have a car, he just chose to walk whenever he could. When he was in the rehab program a year ago, they had told him walking was a good way to distract from the troubles that tempted him to drink. What an irony that he was now using that to go get what he needed to keep going down the rabbit hole. He wondered to himself if he ever did tell Logan that he was an alcoholic. Probably not. He had been too open already, and he didn’t need Logan to pretend to worry about him more.

He frowned as he came up to the coffee shop. There was a reason he avoided the place. It was a harsh reminder to what once was. What was a building full of new opportunities became a building of false hope. He planned to go in as quick as possible then leave as soon as the money was in his hands.

The bell rang above his head as he entered. He remembered the way it rang when Logan had walked through the door. Now, the ring was a shout ringing in his head about how wrong he was.

He walked up to the counter to see Skye, the owner herself, running the counter. Worry filled her eyes as she took in Patton’s appearance. “Wow, Patton, are you okay?” she asked, concern lacing her voice like a thick fog.

He smiled, feeling more hollow, “Yeah, just a lazy day. I’m here for the check.”

She didn’t seem convinced, and he couldn’t blame her. “Yeah, I’ll get it in about fifteen minutes when it’s my turn for break. Why don’t you sit down and wait?”

Patton just shrugged and sat at the table in the corner by the window. Their table. He was a masochist. Maybe the promise of this spring was the promise to remind him of his failures. Failure to stay sober. Failure to to dress himself properly. Failure to keep a job. Failure to keep-

Almost as if the universe were out to punish him further, the bell above the door rang. He saw the slicked back black hair and quickly turned his back to the counter. Please, please don’t see me like this.

He heard the usual order come from Logan. He almost felt the twitch in his fingers to put the order in the register.

He barely heard Skye say something else to Logan. Hoping to himself that she wasn’t pointing him out. He knew this was not going to be the case. Skye cared about them both. She wanted to make sure her friends were okay.

He didn’t want Logan to see him like this. Broken, small, a failure. He curled up in the booth, painfully aware that he and Logan were the only ‘customers’. He knew the moment Logan saw him because he could feel that familiar warmth of his gaze on his shoulder. He closed his eyes. He didn’t need to cry. It was over. He didn’t need to cry. It was over. That’s why he needed to cry, though. It was over.

“Hello, Patton.” Logan greeted.

Patton turned to see Logan standing above him. Logan looked very put together. He looked normal. His clothes were neat, his hair was tidy, and he was carrying his iced coffee like when they first met. It was like being taken back to the past. However, it was a dulled reflection. Logan’s blue eyes weren’t lit up with curiosity, they were iced over. His mouth wasn’t twitching up into a smile, his face was extremely neutral. While Patton’s appearance screamed and outed his heartbreak, Logan’s heartbreak was just a whisper.

“Hi.” It took everything in his power to not call him Starlight.

Logan gestured to the booth, silently questioning if he would sit. Patton just nodded.

Logan sat across from him, a sigh escaped from their lips both. Patton had already started to feel Logan’s grounding presence. For the first time in over a month, he felt hope. Was this the promise of spring?

“I’d ask how you are doing, but I can tell by the silence between us after you left, and your appearance, you are not doing well.” Logan remarked with no tact.

Patton looked out the window. There were couples walking by, children walking with parents. Every single one had a smile on their face, glancing up at the sky. Patton saw that spring had blessed them with kept promises.

“I’m not. I’m not okay one bit,” Patton started, “I don’t have any excuse, or reason, and frankly I’m still a bit drunk from last night so I’m not sober enough to talk about this.” He cringed at that last remark. Logan didn’t know. They had so little time he never told. He didn’t have enough time to tell him everything.

He risked a glance to see Logan nodding with pursed lips. There was a moment of intense silence before Logan started to talk, “I don’t blame you, you know. I don’t hate you, either, and looking at you now after the month that’s passed just shows me that you hold as much pain as I do.”

Patton closed his eyes, “You clearly don’t seem to be in as much pain as me.”

Logan slammed his fist on the table, causing Patton to jump. “Bullshit, Patton.” Patton took in a breath. The ice cold exterior had broken and Logan was spilling over his raging river of anger. “Do you know how long I waited by the door? Do you know how long I stayed home, waiting for you? Do you know how often I called? I may not hate or blame you, because with all this pain I still love you, but I sure as hell am pissed.” Logan’s stare was more intoxicating than anything Patton had consumed.

“I know,” Patton said simply. “Where’s the ring?” he asked, looking at Logan’s bare hands. He hadn’t held any expectations, but it still hurt to see the reminder of what he threw away.

Logan loosened his tie and pulled out a chain, and on it the ring. “It didn’t fit, and I wanted to wait to resize it until you came back.”

He could no longer hold back his tears. Seeing that Logan still held onto hope while Patton threw all of his away showed him just how far he had strayed. He wished so badly he was redeemable enough to go back to the way it was before. He felt so wrong. He leaned his head in his hands. The fog cleared his mind with every sob that escaped from him. He saw the mess he had created. He saw his overreaction to everything. He saw that Logan still carried hope, possibly for them both.

He noticed when Logan had reached over and started to stroke his hair. The way his curls fit around Logan’s fingers made him feel homesick. He used one of his hands to reach across the table, and with no hesitance Logan grasped him. “I’m so sorry, Logan.” he got out.

“I forgive you, Sunshine.” Logan said gruffly. Patton looked up to see Logan was also crying, just more quietly than him. “Please tell me what happened? Please tell me where you went? Just tell me why you never came back.”

The pleas actually reached Patton’s heart. The storm clouds had parted in his mind. He calmed himself down and sat up.

Before he could start to explain, Skye came up to them with an envelope in her hands. She just set it on the table and patted Patton’s shoulder. Her green eyes were filled with pity, and he noticed her go to the door and switch the sign to ‘CLOSED’. He was silently grateful for the privacy she was giving them. He didn’t deserve her kindness after the way he treated the job she had given him.

“Okay,” he breathed out, “Okay.”

Logan sat there, waiting for a response. “I guess,” he started, “I guess I was afraid. I was afraid that I had messed it all up. I didn’t want to give you that ring in the way I did. I was afraid, so I slipped up when I left. I went to the bar,” he closed his eyes in shame, “I went to the bar after two years of being sober. Then when I woke up the next day, not knowing where I was, just in some abandoned house...I hadn’t been that low in years.

I didn’t want to face you after that. We hadn’t even talked much about who I was before you. I couldn’t tell you like that. I couldn’t show you my dark side like...that. So I didn’t. I didn’t, then I just stopped trying to get through it all. I stopped caring,” he choked, “I stopped caring about the progress I threw away. So I threw the hope I held for our future away too.”

He stopped when Logan grasped both of his hands. Logan’s eyes weren’t full of judgment, or pity, or even anger. He still looked so in love it hurt Patton even more. He wanted Logan to be angry with him. “Why aren’t you angry with me yet?”

“Why should I be?” Logan asked, “Why should I punish you more than you’ve already punished yourself?”

Patton shrugged, not knowing how to respond to that logic. He sighed. He didn’t know what to do, he never thought he’d be this close to Logan ever again.

Logan started rubbing his thumbs over Patton’s hands. “Come home with me, Sunshine. I can’t- I can’t bear to see you like this. Please.” It wasn’t a question. It was near a demand.

Patton smiled softly at the man in front of him. He was nowhere near okay, but the promise of spring was that they will both be there someday.

He agreed, “Okay, Starlight.”

Logan hung his head in relief. “It’s so good to hear you say that, Patton.”

~~~~

Patton woke up shaking. He hadn’t been able to stop shaking for three days. He did not miss the withdrawal. He was shaky, he was anxious, and he had been vomiting non stop. His body ached, and he was on day 6 of being sober.

Logan had to go back to work after the first two days since Patton had come back to his house. He left the school’s number on the coffee table, bathroom mirror, fridge, and bedroom door. Reminders that he wasn’t alone. He didn’t want to be an annoyance again, but Logan insisted that he wasn’t. There was a strain in his voice whenever he reminded Patton of this.

Patton tried to stand to head to the bathroom, but he wobbled. Dizziness came in waves along with the headache. He rubbed his cheek to get some feeling in his face. He felt numb. He kept going in between numbness, and extreme emotions. He felt like he was going crazy. He stumbled toward the black curtains. He peeked outside to see it was raining. He sighed, the weather was matching his mood.

He grabbed some of his clothes from the floor. Getting dressed sent pins and needles up his legs. He felt so miserable, and without Logan there, he felt cold. Taking baby steps hurt. It was definitely a fitting punishment for him.

He made it downstairs with no problem. He wanted to check the kitchen for food since he was hungry, but he knew it was pointless. He saw the spot on the kitchen floor where he had thrown up the chicken noodle soup Logan had made for him the night before. There was no indication of his sickness, Logan had been cleaning up for him with infinite patience. Patton felt a pang of guilt as he walked into the living room.

He sat on the couch, reaching for the now clean puke bowl Logan assigned to him. On the coffee table next to the sticky note of the phone number, was another note.

Please don’t hesitate to call me if you need. Also, if you can, please consider what you would like to do for Valentine’s Day tomorrow.

Patton started to tear up. Just last week he hadn’t thought he’d be spending Valentine’s day with his boyfriend. He thought he’d be back at the bar, probably hooking up with someone else to curb the loneliness he had felt. Instead, he was shivering, drowsy, and anxious. He was back at the beginning of recovery. This time, though, it was different.

Spring had brought him the promise that he didn’t need to be alone anymore. The rain outside was a healing one, washing away the wounds of his past to strengthen the budding future between him and Logan. He thought about what he wanted to do tomorrow. He didn’t want to go out, while so far that morning he was a bit stronger, he wasn’t strong enough to handle an outing. He thought about maybe staying in and watching a movie. It was boring, but he hoped Logan didn’t mind.

Logan, who didn’t deserve any of what Patton had given him since the new year. Logan, who had become so soft, so much more sensitive because of Patton. Logan, who he heard crying in bed when he thought Patton was asleep. Logan, who looked at Patton like he was a dream. Logan, who left sticky notes and was willing to be bothered at work than have Patton leave again.

It was too much, Patton thought to himself. Too much to think of by himself. He hadn’t been able to thank Logan properly, or talk properly, since the withdrawal had started. Logan had gone to his apartment to gather his things, and made sure Patton’s car was still safe in the building’s garage. Patton didn’t even ask to move in, he had just stayed because he was too weak to go back to his place. Logan didn’t seem to mind.

Sweet Logan. His comfort. His boyfriend. Was he? Were they back together? Doubt crept into his mind again. What if Logan was letting him stay there because he felt bad for him? What if Logan was crying at night because he was too hurt to have Patton lay in his bed with him?

Before he knew it, he had dialed the work phone number in his cell to call. He was shaking really bad. He wasn’t throwing up, and he could technically move on his own, but he didn’t want to be alone. He couldn’t be alone. He needed Logan to reassure him that it was going to be okay. He needed Logan to remind him of the promise of spring.

The office had connected him to Logan’s classroom phone. A student picked up, “Room 48, who is it?”

Patton tried to speak through the shakes, “A family f-f-friend. It’s an emergency, c-c-c-can I sp-sp-speak to L-Logan?”

The student didn’t verbally answer, but two seconds later he heard his voice on the line. His shakes started to subside a tiny bit as he took in Logan’s soothing voice. “What’s wrong?”

“I c-can’t st-stop shak-k-king” he stuttered out. He was trying to curl up in a ball as his stomach churned. “C-could y-you come hom-m-me early?”

Logan sighed on the line, and Patton’s anxiety skyrocketed. He caught Logan at a bad time. He was going to be bothered and cranky and-

“Give me thirty minutes, is that sufficient or do you need someone there sooner?” Logan didn’t sound annoyed, just concerned.

“Thirty is f-fine,” Patton whispered into the phone.

“I’ll see you then.” Logan promised, then promptly hung up the phone.

Patton just laid there on the couch and let the tears stream down his face. He was too tired and cold to sob. He reached for a blanket and pulled it over his head. He closed his eyes, and next thing he knew he was asleep again.

He woke up a bit later to Logan shaking his shoulder. “Patton. Patton, could you wake up for me?” Concern was lacing his voice which encouraged Patton to try to respond.

“Yes, Logan?” he responded sleepily. He was so tired, he wanted to go back to sleep. He couldn’t help himself and fell back asleep despite Logan’s protests. His voice was like a fading echo as Patton drifted off. Sleeping kept the headache at bay.

His eyes fluttered open to the sound of heavy boots walking toward him, and there was a flashlight in his face. He noticed on the ceiling there were blue and red lights, and a radio was playing a ton of voices. In the back of his mind he knew there was an ambulance.

He wanted to say something, but instead fell back asleep. Or was it sleep? Was the sleep actually him passing out? It might have been.

Next time he woke up there was a pain in his elbow. He opened his eyes slowly, and he definitely was not on the couch. He didn’t need to ask anyone to know he was in the ER. It wasn’t his first time. He saw the pain in his elbow was an IV, probably fluids. He looked to the other side of his bed to see Logan scrolling on his phone with one hand, and holding Patton’s hand in the other.

Logan heard Patton’s head turn, and looked up. Without a word he stood up and kissed Patton with such passion he might have passed out again just from the butterflies in his stomach. He tasted the salt in Logan’s tears. He was suddenly aware of how dry his own lips were, and his tongue, and his throat.

Logan broke the kiss to lean his forehead on Patton’s. “Thank you so much for calling me home, though I would like for you to refrain from giving me anymore heart attacks this year.”

They both dissolved into hysterical giggles. Logan kept kissing Patton all over his face. Patton couldn’t help but laugh. They continued the playfulness until a nurse walked in.

“Good to see you awake, sir. Could you tell me what you remember?” the nurse asked while swiping a card in a scanner by the computer.

Patton told him of how he had stopped drinking the week prior, how he had been having some pretty bad withdrawal, and how he had managed to call Logan before ‘falling asleep’. Logan held his hand through it all, encouraging him to continue when he was too embarrassed. Once he was done, the nurse checked his vitals and walked out.

Patton looked at Logan, blushing. “Sorry for all the trouble, Starlight.”

“Don’t despair Sunshine,” Logan raised a brow, “However, when I requested you consider where you wanted to go for Valentine’s day, this was not what I had in mind.”

Patton furrowed his brow until Logan showed him the time; twelve fifteen am.

Patton giggled again, ignoring the way his abs clenched in pain. “Oops, happy Valentine’s Day I guess.”

Logan just chuckled and shook his head. They both kissed one more time, not caring about the setting they were in. They were together again.

~~~~

May had come, and Patton was happy. The spring rains had stopped so the flowers were blooming everywhere. He loved seeing the flowers in the park open. The world was back to being full of bold colors. The promise of spring had been fulfilled. He was okay again.

He had just finished his interview with Skye. Skye, the ever so patient and caring friend, told him that once he made it to six months sober he could have his job back. Patton readily agreed to the deal. It was more than what he thought he would get.

He was on his way to his usual Thursday 3:15pm appointment. He had an exercise he’d been trying out to see if it helped his mood. On his way to the clinic, he’d make a mental list of three things that held beauty. It could not be the same three things each week. It had been working, and it made him more observant overall.

This week’s three things were: the last flower on the rose bush outside of Logan’s house was blooming, the bookstore had a new display in the window, and there was a golden retriever tied to a bike rack outside the barber shop. The dog had greeted him excitedly, and looking at his watch he had a few minutes to talk to the dog.

“Aw, you’re so gorgeous. I wish I could say hi longer, but I have an appointment to get to. You are adorable, and I hope you also have a good day.” He spent some more seconds petting the dog, and when he made to stand up the dog licked his hand. Bonus beautiful thing.

He made it to the building at 3:05 pm. It was a smaller, green building that sat between a thrift store and sushi bar. Patton wasn’t one for fish, but he knew Logan was. He wanted to take Logan to sushi, but he was going to wait until his first paycheck after returning to work. It was one more thing to motivate him to keep moving forward.

When he was called back to the office, he couldn’t stop grinning to himself. The room was decorated with all of his favorite cartoon characters. When he had first started coming to therapy, he was pretty shy. He had been through it before, and after a while it had gotten too predictable. He knew what he was supposed to do, and when he reached a year sober he wanted to try on his own.

Logan had brought up therapy as an idea, just to help with recovery since relapsing. The doctor was apparently a volunteer at the middle school, after being a grief counselor for the students after their classmate’s death in November. Logan had talked with the doctor when Patton had left. Naturally, Patton was hesitant at first. After a week of Logan talking incessantly about him needing therapy, he gave in. He couldn’t resist his boyfriend’s pleas for long. He learned that the hard way.

He sat on the black sofa, smiling at the Finding Dory poster behind the doctor’s desk. It was only a moment later when the doctor came in.

“Hello, Patton! Do you how do?” the man cheerfully greeted.

Patton grinned in response. They had only had four sessions together, but the rapport was such a good fit. “Hi Dr. Picani, I’m alright. I saw a dog on my way here.”

The therapist gasped, “Was it adorable?”

“Aren’t all dogs?” Patton posed. They both started laughing.

Dr. Picani sighed in relief. “So, what are your threes?”

“Well, the dog I met today. There was also a new display in the bookstore. The last one is that the rose bush in our yard bloomed the last bud.” Patton sighed dreamily, he had taken to tending to the yards since he had the time on his hands. He wasn’t very experienced, but the last rosebud blooming helped boost his confidence.

The therapist couldn’t stop smiling. “Would you like to explore those, or would you like to talk about something else?”

“Well,” Patton squirmed, “Kinda both? I noticed something when thinking about the rose bush.”

“Alright, I’m listening.” Picani grabbed his pencil and notepad.

“In February, when I was at my low point, I had told myself that springtime’s promises of new hope were lies. I had messed up something I loved, I had thrown away two years of sobriety, I mean,” he tried to correct himself. His last session they had worked on the reminder that relapse is a part of recovery. It just meant he had a new goal to reach, and did not discount the proof that he was capable. “That’s what I had thought.”

“When I was in high school, the only reason I tried to push through my struggles in winter was that lovely reminder that I was one day closer to Spring’s Promise,” he smiled to himself, “I’d get to see the flowers bloom.”

“I see,” the therapist nodded, “So the rose budding was a reminder that you had survived another cold winter?”

“Yes!” Patton exclaimed. It was nice to have a therapist who understood him this well.

Dr. Picani scribbled some notes on his pad, then looked up at Patton. “What was this spring’s specific promise? What made you think that this year the promise was a lie?”

Patton looked down at his lap. He had trouble finding the words he needed, and the doctor waited patiently. “I suppose...well I suppose this year the promise was that I was one step closer to, to, well…” Patton rubbed his face and chuckled nervously, “Sorry, I don’t know why I can’t say it.”

“It’s okay, Patton,” Dr. Picani assured softly, “You are safe here.”

Patton nodded. He was safe. He was safe, and he was okay, and he was alive. “That was the promise.”

All the man across from him could muster was an eyebrow raise.

“The promise was I would be safe. I would be secure. Secure in my relationship, in my job, in my sobriety- the promise of this spring was that I was safe. Then…” he trailed off, tears starting to form when the bad feelings in his chest started to resurface when he thought about it. He took the box of tissues Dr. Picani offered. “Thank you. Then I made one mistake and all of that safety was thrown away. The worst part is that I was the one who did the throwing.”

Dr. Picani nodded, adding some more notes on his pad. “Have you ever heard of self-sabotage?”

Patton scoffed, “Yeah, it’s probably the most popular phrase in rehab centers.”

“Hm. Do you know why that is?” Patton shook his head no, so the doctor elaborated, “A lot of people with addictions tend to self sabotage. When someone who gets the life they had always dreamed of, well they tend to have doubts about whether they really deserve it. Does that sound familiar to you?”

Patton nodded, starting to make connections, “So when the doubt comes in, it can be easy to blow one small bad thing into something huge?” He asked.

“Exactly! So when an inevitable, minor miscommunication happens, it can reaffirm that doubt. What is your first instinct when you feel afraid?”

Patton scrunched his eyebrows in deep thought. What was his first reaction? Obviously he ran away, but that was his first action. What was his first response when afraid?

“Hide. I want to hide, and I want to escape. I want to avoid it,” he answered.

“Why is that, do you think?” the therapist tapped his pencil against his chin in thought.

“Hm. I guess because it’s less painful. Drinking was my escape for a while...but then it didn’t last. It just caused more pain.” Patton looked the doctor in the eyes. “Is that why I ran from Logan that day?”

“I don’t know, you tell me,” the other man responded, in classic therapist fashion.

Patton laughed a bit at that trope. Shaking the thought out of his head, he focused back on answering the question. “It is. I wanted to hide from the pain of our first real fight.”

Patton felt a release off of his shoulders when he made the confession. Realizing that the promise of spring was never broken, it was just delayed. He had been seeking security in all of the wrong places. He felt the final piece of the puzzle fall into place. Spring’s promise had been kept.

He came home right after Logan. Without hesitance he pounced onto his love and planted a kiss on the man’s lips. He held the man in his arms and felt the roots from autumn continue to grow beneath them. He was no longer scared of ruining it all. He felt secure in himself to be able to handle whatever challenges came his way.

Logan pulled back, a puzzled smile on his face, “It’s nice to see you too, Sunshine. What was that for though?”

Patton laughed and wrapped his arms around Logan. “I feel safe with you. Thank you for being my constant. Today I realized you’re as steady and eternal as the stars,” He planted another kiss, “Hm, maybe that’s why I call you my Starlight.”

Logan smirked against his lips. “I hate to break it to you, but the light of the stars we see are probably a result of the distance the light traveled. Some believe the stars we see have actually died.”

Patton giggled and playfully slapped Logan’s shoulder. “Shut up and let me be romantic.”

They kissed once more, smiling the whole time.

525,600 Minutes

August was almost over. Logan was very aware of what day it was for him and Patton. He couldn’t stop pacing in the living room while he waited for Patton to return from work. He had everything set up just right. There were candles flickering in the living room with the lights dimmed. He had gotten over his fears of what he had planned, mostly.

He and Patton had never fully discussed what his ring meant. At the time, it was meant to be an engagement ring. The reasoning being a bit extreme for Logan, and the fallout after, made him hesitant to accept an engagement. He still wore the ring on his neck. It was a reminder. It was a promise. He never took it off, up until that moment.

He was still pacing when Patton walked in. Patton’s brown eyes widened in astonishment at the setup. “Logan, Starlight, this is-this is magical.”

Logan cleared his throat nervously, and adjusted his glasses. “I uh, I have something I need to tell you. Let us sit on the couch?”

Patton nodded and sat down obediently. Logan wanted to sit, but he decided at the last minute it was better to stand and pace. It helped bring his thoughts together. “Patton, on this day last year I took a chance. I kissed you, and I have kissed you many times since.”

Patton nodded, “Yeah, that’s kind of what boyfriends do.”

Logan blushed, and stopped pacing to look at Patton. Looking at Patton, his lover, his light, his everything. If he had doubts before, he didn’t then. Patton’s curls in the candlelight made him see more clearly than he had a year prior. What was only mere suspicion was now a proven fact. He was ready.

Logan hesitantly, slowly knelt before Patton. A gasp escaped from the lips of the angel. The angel that was once a mystery. His beautiful, wonderful Sunshine. “In December, when you ran, I wasn’t ready. After we rejoined in February, you weren’t ready. Neither was I, truth be told. However, now I see you. You’re thriving. You’re shining brighter every day.”

Logan pulled his ring, the ring Patton had given him, out of his pocket and put it on his own ring finger.

Patton had tears streaming down his face. Rivers covering the freckles on his face. “It- it fits now?”

Logan nodded. “I had it resized, the same day I purchased this,” he pulled a ring box out of his other pocket. It was identical to the one he had received all those months ago from Patton.

Patton covered his mouth to quiet his happy sobs. Logan cleared his throat once more. He wanted to speak clearly. “You said one year ago that my affection was a rare honor that I had given to you. Would you be so kind as to return that honor, and marry me?”

Logan opened the ring box, showing a ring nearly identical to his. However, the sapphires were replaced with yellow topaz. Patton wiped the tears from his eyes, revealing a smile. He reached for the box to pull out the ring. He put it up to read the inscription.

“My Sunshine.” they spoke in unison.

Patton put the ring on, “How did you know to get the right size?” he asked.

Logan chuckled. “I had figured that you used your own finger as a measurement for mine.” They shared a laugh before Logan hesitantly asked, “So is this a…?”

Patton launched himself at Logan, knocking him over so they ended up tangled on the floor. Logan let out a grunt of surprise that seemed quiet compared to Patton’s scream of “Yes! Yes, yes, yes my Starlight!”

They embraced, laying on the floor in the candle light. They kissed each other all over. The two, Logan and Patton, the lights of the stars and the sun, had finally seen each other clearly.

They both laid there, staring at their hands, both wearing their matching rings. A fitting finale to their first seasons of love, and a fitting beginning to the rest of their years together.

Let me know if you wanna be added to the taglist of any of my ships!

#logicality #logicality fic #sanders sides #sanders sides fic #Mama Cesa writes #suicide mention #self deprecation #anxiety #alcoholism #arguing #one piece fic #oneshot #over 15k words

117 notes · View notes

straightuppotato-art · 2 years

Text

Half of their relationship is just Yuka harassing Rosy and him being into it 🤷‍♀️

#I was lowkey trying to channel Edgeworth’s shocked sprites lmaoooo #Wait hold on #Now I’m thinking about Rosy playing Ace Attorney…#anyways that got off topic #I love these dorks very much your honor #art that i do #artists on tumblr #interactive fiction #mind blind #mind blind if #Button wiseman #OC: Yuka #OC: Yuka Wiseman #Ambrose Kim #Rosy Kim #Ship: Sun Showers and Summer Storms

22 notes · View notes

the-ship-maker-2 · 3 years

Note

Hi may I have a creepypasta ship please? Thank you in advance and I hope you have a great day/night.

Zodiac sign: Leo sun, Aries moon, Leo rising

Personality Type: ENTP

Pronouns: She/her

Sexuality: Straight (For now might be bi but i'm going with straight)

I'm 5'4 and I have a very tiny body frame so i'm extremely petite and pretty small. I'm not very curvy and I literally have the body of a cereal box...lol but its fine because I have nice hips and thighs. I have thick brown hair that goes down to my back and it gets tangled pretty easily but its kinda fluffy. I have brown eyes and tiny freckles all over my face and body. I also have a very strong grunge style, like Flannels, band t-shirts, combat boots, leather jackets etc. But i'd also always enjoy a nice oversized sweatshirt or hoodie with a pair of skinny, ripped jeans and some converses or something along those lines.

For my personality.....this is where things get interesting. At first people find me very intimidating due to my resting bitch face and cold exterior but I promise i'm not like that ALL the time. When you get to know me, i'm goofy and about everything that comes out of my mouth is sarcasm or some dry humored joke. I'm also that one friend in a group where they literally will do the stupidest shit ever like for an example one time it was super dark outside and my other friend was there, while I was trying to climb a tree and I failed and fell out of the tree, and landed on my back. I got straight up after that somehow it didn't hurt.....like at all? But yeah i'm super reckless and sometimes people have to save me from myself if you get what I mean. I also have a very strong "I don't give a fuck" attitude and I will not hesitate to stick up for myself or my friends....like i'm the type of person where if someone glares at me, i'll glare right back.

I have bad anxiety and I can be very self destructive. This is where my feisty, stubborn, hardheaded side comes in. If I want something then i'll fight for it even if it hurts me and i'll get into a bad cycle of putting myself down and trying to do better even if I did great the first time but I always push myself too far and other people have to stop me because I usually can't see it when its happening. I also cover my emotions up and I have a lot of trouble talking about whats bothering me or what problems i'm having emotionally so I put up a wall and I act tough, or happy and sometimes i'll be the exact opposite but I try to hide it.

Weird things about me: I've grown up in the south all my life so sometimes when I talk a few words they'll come out sounding WAYYY more country and southern then I wanted, I don't have an accent but sometimes my words just come out that way. I also love the smell of cigarette smoke....let me explain. When I was a kid my parents smoked a lot and I was used to smelling it and now it reminds me of home and is sort of comforting. Sometimes in the middle of the night you can find me just staring at a wall or something because I can't go to sleep.....I have trouble sleeping.....

Things I like: I love swimming (I was on a swim team for about 9 years), I love horror movies, I like rain and the sounds of thunderstorms because its calming to me, I also love the smell of rain, I like cloudy days, cooking, listening to 80's and 90's rock but mainly 90's because 90's is the best, My favorite bands are Bush, Audioslave, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Linkoln Park, Pearl jam but i'm pretty open to anything.

Things I dislike: Spiders.......I will scream if I see a spider.

Alright here we go!

I match you with....

Ticci Toby

-he loves your small size and height

-he loves picking you up and carrying you around

-he loves your body structure too especially when he can rest his head on your thighs and you play with his hair

-he will do your hair for you as often as you want

-he'll also play connect the dots with your freckles and his as well

-he'll lend you some of his band shirts and flannels that he stole from Tim. You and him have the same style

-hes very shy and reserved so he would stay away from you at first

-but after awhile of being forced to spend time together you two bring out each other's goofy and humorous side

-he'll never let you do stupid things....alone.

-Tim has to stop both of you constantly

-he needs someone who is able to stick up for themselves and for him.

-however hes able to tell when things get too out of hand so he drags you away from a fight kicking and screaming

-he will always shower you with praise and always let you know that you did great and that you're good enough

-he also has trouble expressing his emotions and talking things out too.

-however he will not push you to talk if you don't want to

-but he tries to get you to talk gently

-he loves swimming and camping in the summer. You two will spend most of your days at the lake.

-horror movie nights are a must with him

-sometimes you two will sit out on the porch huddled under a blanket and listen and watch the storm

-omg feed this boy your cooking and he'll love you forever

-you two have the same music tastes so you two will have jam sessions for hours on end

-he loves your accent and how you say things its adorable to him

-he hates the smell of cigarette smoke because of his dad

-he has a hard time sleeping too. So you two will stay up together and just talk about anything and everything.

-he can and will kill a spider for you

I hope you like this and feel free to ask again!

#creepypasta #creepypasta fandom #ticci toby #toby rogers #match ups #send me requests #please flood my inbox #please and thank you

1 note · View note

the-magic-lava-lamp · 4 years

Text

Enjoy Yourself (It’s Later Than You Think)

Summary: (Title based on THIS song) ! Val looked into the rear-view mirror and saw that the sky was nearly drained of all brightness. It had surely been an exhausting day. She was surprised Jane hadn’t faded off during the drive to their next motel, not even once and they’d done a lot of running around--

The sound of Jane slipping in her sleep and falling onto the car door ledge thumped in Val’s ear.

(Sequel to ‘Too Busy Thinking About My Baby’!)

Ships: ValJane

Word Count: 5,783

Valkyrie laid back on the front car seats as Jane hovered above her, sitting on the edge of the car door.

Val closed one of his eyes so the sun was behind Jane’s head instead of shining down to worsen her vision. She rolled her toothpick to the other side of her mouth and whistled past the small gap.

They had about ten minutes to kill before they'd have to move to keep the trip on schedule. A small shiver seemed to pass through Jane as she pulled at her shirt. Val lifted the toothpick from her lips and put her elbow next to her on the seat, hand put through his steering wheel. She squinted one open eye and read the patch sewn into her t-shirt. Just above her heart read 'The answers are out there!' .

"Val, take that out of your mouth before you swallow it." Came Jane’s voice, followed by a soft kick to the bottom of Val’s shoe that was only half on. She rolled her eyes and sat up so that he was between Jane’s legs, arm resting on her thigh.

Jane’s eyebrow lifted but gladly accepted the curious little kiss Val offered when she removed the stick. Decidedly, Jane pecked her girl’s cheek when she glanced off towards the rest area. “Baby, believe me-” She spoke softly and planted a few more kisses “This trip is going to be perfect.” That time she just nuzzled her nose against her neck.

Jane pulled up to allow Val a look at her. The sudden movement made the sunglasses, which had been resting on her head, fall over her eyes and slip down the slope of her nose.

Val glowed and pushed them up for her with an easy-going bliss. “Go pee. I’ll drive the car up to the sidewalk and meet you on the way out.” She chuckled, patting Jane’s knee before the girl hopped off the car.

: : : : : Jane was just passing the cute little bushes outside of the building when the familiar honk of Val's car pulled her out of her thoughts.

Val had one outstretched arm lounging on the wheel, that toothpick hung from her sideways smile again. "You goin' my way doll?" She smirked as some kind of vaguely vintage voice fell from her lips.

Jane strolled over, gripping a nearby sign pole and twirling around it. Hues of the rising sun tinted her cheeks. "Is there any other way to go, darling?" She giggled and galloped over. Flinging her purse inside first than herself, jumping over the door.

Reaching into her bag, Jane grabbed the long thin summer scarf Val had bought her. It was intended to help her live-out some strange fantasy she’d had as a young teen, involving up-and-leaving home & traveling in a convertible car with it blowing in the wind...Man, Val adored her.

Val tilted her chin down and allowed her suns-glasses to fall, pursing her lips. “Let’s roll, baby.”

Jane pointed her finger towards the open road and laughed madly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Valkyrie had planned a small road-trip back to New Mexico for the couples one-year anniversary. Which, was a very big deal in Val’s opinion.

The two of them had basically been stuck together since they’d begun dating but funny enough, they never really took themselves too seriously. It was more because of Val’s hesitation of commitment, if anything. But Jane was happy to take things slowly too. They were girlfriends. They were 100% exclusive. But they pretty much kept away from serious talks. Val felt a little guilty but at the same time...proud her feelings were a part of a true relationship.

Jane was curled up against the door wearing Val’s hoodie as the orange sky faded to deep purples. The sleeves were pulled over her hands & she kept drifting in-and-out of sleep.

“Wake up, sprite.” Val gently reached over and shook her knee, listening once again to the soft sighs which escaped her girlfriend’s lips when she woke up. “Don’t leave me on my own.”

Jane sat up and grinned. “Sorry.” She rubbed her eyes and moved to take her cell which was hooked up to the radio. “I had a dream that I was psychic. I kinda wanted to know where it was going.” She stretched and made herself comfortable again.

Val smirked. “Oh yeah? What did dream Jane see in her visions?”

The girl shrugged and took a sip of Val’s coffee. She opened her mouth like she was about to answer but blinked up towards the sky. “Was that lightning or did I just rub my eyes too hard?” She scrunched her nose.

Val turned and caught a quick glimpse of another bolt. Her answer was to roll up the roof and close all the windows. Just in time.

The violet sky thundered above them poured down hard drops of rain which pounded against the car. Jane giggled as the air conditioning blew her hair back with that stale breeze.

She pulled herself up in her seat to get a better view from Val’s window. Another bolt crashed and seemed to crackle in the shine of Jane’s watchful eyes when it reflected in the brown.

“Y’know, I wanted to be a storm-chaser when I was little.” Val stole a quick glance at the woman and gripped tightly on the wheel.

“Me too.” Jane fell back into a relaxed position and grinned like she was in the presence of something truly magical. “It probably started with weather; I was fascinated by the natural elements we lived our lives around-”

Val smirked. “But it wasn’t enough. Sky wasn’t the limit for you, baby.”

Jane gently pinched her arm. “I’m who I am today because as a child...I just decided science was what interested me most.” She paused and stared out the windshield. “I just liked space and now...” She shrugged. “Isn’t that crazy?”

“Crazy, yes.” Val nodded, turning the car into the small parking lot of a gas station. “But believable.” She smirked and turned the car off. “You get where you’re going when you work hard for it, Jane.”

Jane shrugged. “You’d know.” She said with earnest pride and brushed a curl away from Val’s eyes before planting a small kiss on her cheek. She admired her girlfriends work with an organization which helped to match people with possible career options, internships etc. Val really enjoyed working with people & guiding them in their search for jobs they were actually passionate about.

Plus, Val was one hell of a fighter in her spare time too. She consistently trained at the gym and was the swiftest, smoothest...warrior (that was the best word for it) Jane had ever seen.

Val parked the car and slowly climbed out, watching Jane hop out to look up into the storm. Heavy raindrops fell down upon them & soaked through the comfy outfits they’d been wearing but neither cared.

“Buy me a crappy gas station hot-dog?” Val made a puppy dog face even though Jane was sure to agree.

She nodded & made a ‘come here’ gesture before swirling on her heels.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“A toast!” Val raised her body, legs now curled under her thighs. Behind her, the wind blew her curls around and annoyingly through the large-ish earrings she loved so much.

The old fashioned lawn flamingo shapes were covered by her hair & missing great opportunities to catch the light. The florescent plastic pieces were always a hit.

She raised her delicate paper cup filled with the tea they were splitting. They’d picked it up a couple stops ago when they were too lazy to go back for their forgotten credit cards. So they’d paid outta pocket which afforded just one can.

Jane whistled and raised her own tiny cup from the holder as she turned into their desired motel. ‘The Pink Moon’

“To...?”

“To us!” Val tapped the cups as they pulled into the parking spot. When it came to a stop, she wiggled around until she was successfully unbuckled and sitting criss-cross. She pushed some hair away from her eye and swallowed. “Happy first anniversary, Jane.”

Her girlfriend grinned, downing the small drink with her. “Happy first anniversary, honey.” She swallowed and pushed forward for a kiss which would be on both of their minds for a long time after.

Val blushed and rolled her shoulders back to stretch out a little when he feet hit the pavement. The sun light trailed down Val’s skin and comforted her.

The sidewalk was cracked and the dirt bled through with small dead flowers pressed down like veins, quietly Jane was muttering the lyrics of a song that would be plugged into both of their brains when they tried to sleep that night.

She wondered if ‘The Pink Moon’ had comfortable beds. She grabbed her bag and pulled it over her shoulder. As Val squinted in front of herself, looking through the rose tinted filter of Jane’s sunglasses, her hands dampened.

Naturally, both girls stopped to take in the location before collecting their key. Just searching for little things to look at. The round sunglasses dipped to the tip of Val’s nose as a tall dusted orange bus plowed down the street.

Jane whistled again, turning her chin to Val with a sly smile. “You got a smile so bright, You know you could have been a candle...” She raised the volume of her previous singing.

Val pursed her lips. “Is that supposed to be good?” She teased but swept Jane’s hand up in her’s for the girl to twist under. She spun Jane to her chest and they bobbled in their spot before finally breaking & walking to the office.

: : : : : : : : : : Jane watched her girl prepare little drinks for their enjoyment which was actually quite interesting. Val moved with such rhythm and...joy. The girl was just so full of life. She was fresh from the shower and wearing perhaps the comfiest looking robe in the world.

When she was finished, Val launched herself strategically on the bed (not spilling a drop of their drinks) and held one under Jane’s nose.

Val’s dark hair dripped water down in a slinky path against her dewy skin, tired droplets paused and waited as flybys sped down to collide against them. Cold air breezed from Jane’s mouth and settled into the air as she admired her.

Val took a deep breath, eyes fluttering closed with satisfaction as the heat in her chest returned. She brought her knees up as her back curved, making her body a true reflection of her current state. Tiny pins and needles poked from under the bottoms of her feet, she wiggled her toes. But after a few seconds, she let them be. Sometimes it was a little euphoric to feel that little vibration of sleeping limbs.

She turned to her girlfriend, confused at the large amount of attention she was giving her. She chuckled. “What’s up, sprite?”

“I wanna eat the eat the mixed nuts we bought and watch dumb TV with you. Right now.” She surprised herself with a tiny giggle and pulled the remote towards her.

Val pulled the bag over and dropped the can into her lap, pulling the lid open and offering Jane the first grab.

: : : : : : : : : :

The drips of coal black mascara (that had not so long ago dripped down her cheeks) was tightening against Jane’s skin. The dark river was now drying on the canvas of her face with astoundingly beautiful blue reflections from the cut of her fake crystal ring. As she held the thing just over her face to admire her own handy kaleidoscope, Jane felt her body tingle from the afterglow of their night spent together.

Val reached over with her thumbs and rubbed at Jane’s runny makeup.

“It’s gross. I sweat way too much.” Jane helplessly giggled and tried to rub it off herself...with Val’s sleeve. But she broke off to enjoy the nice feeling coming over her.

Starting from her curled toes, the tickling pleasure traveled her body through electrifying shivers. She let her head fall back to sigh towards the ceiling before she attempted to calm the natural reaction down. Val obviously took amusement from the sight. She crawled to the side of the bed, the silky sheets pooled at her hips while a smile instinctively came across her face.

“Tired?” She asked, lazily resting her chin on her palm.

Jane nodded, squishing down on her pillow. “But pass the can first?” She made a grabby gesture towards the mixed nuts on the night stand behind Val.

Val cuddled up next to her as she crunched down a pistachio, absolutely melting Jane’s heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What’s there to do in Indianapolis?” Val scrunched up her nose and threw her arm around Jane, who was trying to read one of the pamphlets she’d swiped. Their hair blew in the wind and smacked against them in uncomfortable swirls.

“Ummm-” Jane bit into her cheek. “Watch competitive driving?” She nodded, rolling her eyes. Val hummed and sat her chin onto her girlfriend’s shoulder.

“You want to see some driving, don’t you?” Jane giggled and flipped the pamphlet, tucking it back into her back pocket. “There’s fifteen dollar admission today to see some practicing on the track.” She squinted towards the sun, already a master of information.

“You wanna spend the day in the sun, listening to loud cars?” Val grinned, eager just from saying the words. Jane winked and took her hand.

“Sure thing, baby!” She swung their grip between them, feeling their palms slide from slick sweat.

: : : : : : : : : :

The sun was forgiving to them that afternoon. Glittering yellow and orange hued beams bled down from the sky & dusted their sun-burnt shoulders.

Jane’s slender fingers traced thin lines up and down Val’s legs. Rubbing the pads of her fingers over the budding stubble. It was mostly a subconscious act, her mind was focused on the track in front of them. Her hair fell into her face as the speeding car went round the corner another time.

The grassy hill was the perfect spot for them. They cuddled together at one of the least populated spots to mindlessly enjoy the practiced speeding & enjoy the warm summer day outdoors. Crawling across their spread of a new blanket, Val gripped her girlfriend’s non-dominant hand & took the cup of soda. She sipped at it every now and then just to get the feeling of a sour bite at her lips.

With that moment’s satisfaction, she decided to tune back into full life where Jane was taking down some notes about one of her many projects in a spare notebook she kept on hand. The pad was balanced atop Val’s legs where it occasionally wobbled.

Jane was under the shade of a new hat with the number of a driver they’d randomly chosen to be their favorite. She peeked a look to her side to admire the lovely company she was sharing.

Another car zoomed past as Val blew a whistle of relief from her lips. The sunlight was bouncing off the crevices of her skin, naturally she leaned her neck back so it could dust across her cheeks. When the music playing suddenly blasted louder, she was mouthing the words slowly and drawing them out thoughtfully. The moment was unspoiled and sweet, the wind was blowing in a few small bursts that curled her baby hairs to her temple.

“I love you.” Dropping her pen, Jane spoke without really thinking while it rolled down the paper and onto the blanket.

Val snapped her head over and looked at her with an...unreadable expression. Not bad but...not exactly perfect either.

“Mmmm.” Jane pursed her lips and shook her head. “I’m sorry. I just made this day weird.” Her hair whipped around as she shuffled to get her stuff into her purse.

“No.”

Both girls paused when Val sat up to grab Jane’s wrist. They stared down at the grip just so they wouldn’t have to make eye contact. “Jane...I’m sorry. I’m just not very good at this.” She frowned.

Ever the impressive, Jane playfully twisted out of the grasp flawlessly and shrugged without a care in the world. Though she cared very, very deeply. “You don’t have to say it back if you’re not ready.”

Val leaned forward and pressed their lips together, gently but with enough passion to draw Jane’s hands to caress her cheeks. After a few seconds, they pulled apart and Val looked about ready to pop with anxiety. Her eyes, wide & adoring.

“That’s good with me, baby.” Jane nodded and happily snuggled under her girlfriend’s arm.

“Are you sure?” Val let some of her walls come down, feeling vulnerable and guilty. Jane didn’t like her feeling that way when there was absolutely no need for it.

She grabbed her cheeks again. “One-Hundred percent. I know how you feel.” They smiled at each other for a few minutes before Jane rubbed their noses together and fell back onto the blanket.

: : : : : : : : : :

The end of the day was creeping up on Val as she turned the car down another street. The sun was setting, burning the rest of the afternoon oil out and she had sweat sticking to her forehead.

Val looked into the rear-view mirror and saw that the sky was nearly drained of all brightness. It had surely been an exhausting day. She was surprised Jane hadn’t faded off during the drive to their next motel, not even once and they’d done a lot of running around--

The sound of Jane slipping in her sleep and falling onto the car door ledge thumped in Val’s ear.

She laughed and picked up the pace just a touch while the sun fell perfectly align with the curve of their windshield. She squinted and used a spare hand to playfully rub the side of her girl’s head. Ruffling her hair, she turned the wheel onto the next street after what felt like an eternity.

‘The Jewel Cowboy’ stood at the end of the empty street with a friendly looking neon moon towering above it. Inside lived the outline of a neighborly cowboy who’s lasso buzzed towards the entrance.

“C’mon sprite.” Val slowly came to a park and gently unbuckled herself and then her girlfriend who was now pretending to still be asleep.

Her eagerness to get inside to relax was pulling some speed out of her quick fingers. Jane’s lovely eyes fluttered open as sweat dripped down her temple. The ache to just sit down to eat was immense. So when her girl finally hopped out to follow her, Val breathed in and out slowly to really enjoy the relief of rest.

After collecting their key, the girls headed straight for their room.

The motel carpet beneath her cradled her aching feet and soothed any pain. It had been non-stop walking and running all day and she was dead tired. Cracking her neck gently, in a way Jane had advised her against many times, she sat down on the bed.

“The sun is sinking in the west,The cattle go down to the stream. The redwing settles in the nest. It's time for a cowboy to dream--”

Jane strolled around their fun little room, admiring the framed photos of cowboys & sprinting horses. She sang to herself in that soft voice which Val had come to adore. “I love this Motel, by the way.” She giggled and flung herself onto the bed.

“I know. It’s incredible.” Val shifted so that Jane could climb into her lap. They admired each other with the same glow in their eyes, starlight breaking in through the window. Val gently ran a hand through the satin of Jane’s hair and laid it to rest on the back of her neck.

Jane hummed and reached out to tap Val’s nose with her finger. “What time do we have to wake-up, again?”

“Five a.m.” Val scrunched up her nose with an apologetic expression. “It’s eleven hours to Oklahoma City, our next stop.” A tremble passed through her when Jane sleepily leaned forward and put her head on her shoulder.

She hugged her close and found that it was easier to allow her emotions to take over when Jane wasn’t looking directly at her.

She thought...maybe she could say it now...

Her mouth opened but closed once she realized...she wanted to say it while admiring Jane’s beautifully curious face. If she wasn’t ready to admit her love to her girlfriend’s face, than saying it over her shoulder was not going to happen just because it was easier.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All around them small-town businesses stretched out until the view fell over the edge of the horizon. The road looked as if it would do the same if they just kept driving.

“Sandman.” Val squinted and mumbled to herself, noticing Jane’s confused look instantly after. She carefully pointed to the sign they were about to pass.

Jane blinked towards it.

‘Sandman Music Fest. Tonight & Tomorrow. Been here all along. Bring your friends!’

She smiled and rubbed her palms down her jean-clad thighs. “Oklahoma city is going to have to wait.”

Val whistled and raised her right hand, pumping it into the open, dusty air.

: : : : : : : : : :

Jane had heard herself described as ‘fatally-focused’ from an ex...far too set on her career in a way which pushed people away. Quite the jewel of a comment made her feel dull and dim. She supposed that may have been true for a while. But she wouldn’t have called it ‘fatal’. Maybe just ‘successfully focused’.

She smiled to herself as music poured from the stage in front of her.

It propelled her into her dream career & brought her to a meeting a girl with equal determination and a bright personality. Val took everything in stride, somehow finding beauty in everything.

Her childlike eyes would brighten at the simple chance to just speak. And there she stood, under the low hanging sun with grass stains painted all down her legs, talking. Any energy she’d had, had up and left Jane a little over an hour and a half ago.

But something about her girlfriend just made everything something you wouldn’t dare to miss.

The sky was a fading orange color & rain was just beginning to fall. Jane was yawning more than she was talking. But a simple look to Val with that fire in her eyes mysteriously left her thirsty for more home-town music.

Some band was playing a song about a rambler finally coming home to the place where they belong & Jane swept herself under Val’s arm. They didn’t know the words to the local songs but both girls sang along anyway. Swaying to each tune and laughing the words out with an odd passion.

The hoops Val wore, which were shaped like suns, bounced as she tried to guide her girlfriend in one of the few dances she knew. In a flurry mixture of soft and bright colors, Val and Jane were quite literally frolicking through the grassy field of the Fest.

The insides of their shoes were beginning to slosh around with puddles of water which only lead them to the decision to kick them off. Jane was mid-spin when she nearly fell over. Droplets of rain flung from each strand of her light hair and pelted against Val’s hot skin. It only urged her on. Never in her life had Jane been so carelessly into having fun.

But in the year she’d grown extremely close to Val, things within her were changing.

Val heaved her heavy-weighted shoes off and felt the earth between her toes. Mud squished just under her heels. She tilted her chin to the sky and smiled with nuanced disgust before taking off (shoes now in her hands) after her girl who was now running towards the tables.

Their laughter carried through the air with distinct pleasure. Jane glided across the huge lawn with a smile anyone could easily become obsessed with. Val partly envied the grace in which Jane moved with. It came naturally to her whereas that was something she had never mastered.

The calm surrender it took to move so fluidly was a trait lost on herself. But maybe today was different because her heart was beating in time with Jane’s.

“What happened to your shoes?” Jane chuckled as Val came to a stop in front of her, sitting on one of the benches.

Val held them up, the bottom of the right was torn up due to the cheapness and the left just gave her blisters. She plopped them down on the wood table and sat across Jane. Stretching her legs to rest on the bench next to Jane and wiggling her toes.

“Are you having a good time?” She asked, a little mischievously.

Jane glanced over from the stage where her eyes had previously rested and tilted her head. Amusement was clear in her expression. “The best time.” She shrugged with a tiny bashful grin. “I’m gonna call Bruce to see if he’s had any problems apartment sitting for me.”

She pulled out her phone as a young woman on stage began her own rendition of Selena’s ‘La Carcacha’.

Val tuned out of the phone conversation, just fine with watching Jane’s expressions and movements. Her eyes were wide and bobbing up & down as she nodded along to whatever it was Bruce was saying. And then she simply smiled, pushing hair behind her ear.

: : : : : : : : : :

Val cuddled up inside Jane’s flannel shirt and watched her girlfriend do the same in the sweatshirt she’d borrowed from her. The girls were standing under the shade of a slanted road-sign with their comically large map clenched in each of their fists.

After around 18 + hours, they’d made it to New Mexico and made it their mission to explore all the hot-spots the state had to offer.

“I’m hungry. Are you hungry?”

Val pursed her lips. “Yeah, we should probably eat. But do you want something like breakfast or lunch cause it’s that weird in-between time-?”

Both girls paused as an older gentleman passed by, not paying them any mind. He walked between them without even looking up but what made the girls smile was the music pouring loudly from his large headphones...

"I ain't gonna act politically correct. I only want to have a good time. The best thing about being a woman is the prerogative to have a little fun-”

Jane watched him walk off, not a care in his world, with the happiest grin. Val chuckled and held out her palm which was clasped in mere seconds.

They walked off in a random direction in search of some kind of diner.

: : : : :

The one they ended up inside was charming and indeed tiny.

The television in the corner was running some old episodes of ‘The Golden Girls’ and Jane was lazily sipping her coffee while occasionally explaining why certain lines were funny. Val, who’d never seen the show in her life, kept herself busy by pressing soft kisses to her warm cheek.

“Sweetheart?” Jane mumbled into her drink and wiggled happily as Val hummed in her ear. “Try my coffee, it’s the best cup I have ever had in my life.”

Val allowed her to hold it to her lips and swallowed a nice steamy gulp as their fellow customers loudly enjoyed their conversations. Jane watched her drink and felt a tug in her chest as she let her chin rest on her shoulder. “You’re my greatest discovery.” She mumbled into the fabric of Val’s shirt as the girl set down the mug.

Val raised her brows with amusement and smirked.

“I’ve dedicated my life to my research and discovered some amazing things, Val-”

“Show-off.” Val teased and Jane pinched her arm. “Just keeping you humble, Honey.”

Jane kissed her briefly on the cheek. “All I’m saying is...meeting you was the greatest discovery of my life.” She leaned against Val as her arm laid across her shoulders.

Val tried to collect her thoughts on that beautiful sentiment and found it to be rather difficult. The words for a response were somehow not enough...so she wrapped both arms around Jane and squeezed, nuzzling her head into her shoulder. “More than words, Jane. More than fucking words, you know?” She mumbled.

Jane hummed. “Yeah baby, I know.” She giggled.

: : : : : : : : : :

Two days later, Jane was relaxing on the balcony area of their next motel suite as Val sat atop the railing. Her legs swayed back and forth without a care in the world while she enjoyed the sights and sounds of harmonious joy from the other guests in the pool.

The light was golden with a dusting on pink as it laid over them & warmed their skin. There were moments where the woman felt like she may never be given something so peaceful as this scene again but...looking back at Jane (subconsciously making faces at her open novel) she smiled.

The neighboring door flying open almost made Val fall forward.

“Hey. Anyone up for a round of volleyball? I’m so bored that I accidentally zoned out for like an hour. So I need to get outta my room.” Came a cheerful woman as she stuck her head out of her room with the sport-ball in her hand.

Jane looked up and smiled.

“Yes please!” Val turned and hoped off the railing and glided over towards Jane. “My girlfriend would love to watch me play volleyball.” She ruffled Jane’s hair as she teased her.

The woman chuckled, shutting her door behind her. “You two are cute.” She stuck her hand out. “I’m Sif, by the way.” Both Jane & Val shook her hand and introduced themselves.

And Val ended up being right....

When the girls went downstairs to the court just outside, Jane pulled up a deck chair to the edge of the sand to watch her girlfriend serve & flawlessly dive for the ball. Her book completely forgotten in her lap.

: : : : : : : : : :

Elephant Butte Reservoir.

A place for great swimming, water-skiing, boating, with plenty of soft sand to stretch out on.

Val had planned on visiting the not so secret beach from the beginning of their New Mexico trip. Considering Jane had expressed interest in the spot but never had the chance to go on her own when she lived in the state.

The whole State Park was just about the most gorgeous way to spend a sunny summer day. The girls walked the path down to the beach and felt the sand between their toes.

From across Jane was the young face of her lovely companion in the sun and nothing could be better. Val waved her hand around her face to feel just a little bit of a teasing cool breeze. She sighed pleasantly, audibly relaxed with how the day was going which was no grand surprise. It had been perfect so far.

Val began to adjust and re-adjust their towel in the nicest way to avoid too much of an annoying glare from the sun. But Jane guessed it was no use because the girl just continued to gradually grow more and more annoyed while the towel blew in the wind.

She was no stranger to huffing and puffing about minor issues herself, however, her girl just seemed plain tired of it like a woman who’d been on the road for days stressing over making the perfect trip. The sunlight coated her face with a sharp orange stripe that went across her cheeks. Jane just knew it had to be undoubtedly warm and she envied the feeling of a sun fever.

After a few moments of what Jane assumed was either contemplation or disassociation, Val handed the towel over to Jane to lay over the sand instead. Which took a few more minutes.

The waves collided with the sand and washed up to the tips of their toes. Val reflected on the landscape while creeping her hand over to Jane’s. Cupping them together eased her into complete peace. It’s rare for something to feel so right but...they did.

The words finally came naturally to the tip of Val’s tongue with no hesitation. Why waste anymore time holding back her feelings? Time sure as hell goes by...

The waves spilled over her feet once more & as quick as a wink, they retreated back.

“Hey sprite?”

Jane turned and let her sunglasses slip down to the tip of her nose, the summer color scheme looking unbelievably good on her. “Hey Val?” She grinned.

“I love you.” Val couldn’t believe how gentle & nervous she sounded. Which was ridiculous considering Jane had already voiced her love.

Jane was overcome with a blushed grin which was as vibrant as the sunset they’d watch last night. She attempted to hide behind her hands as she happy giggled. “I know.” She reached over to tenderly rub down Val’s thigh. “And I love you too.”

Val smashed their lips together.

: : : : : : : : : : After the New Mexico Road-Trip, home seemed so boring to Val. But she did enjoy following Jane into her apartment. The girl was checking her mail and mumbling ‘Please Mr. Postman’ under her breath.

They hopped up the stairs for the first time in a long time and opened her door to see...Thor, Bruce, Darcy & Loki all in various seats watching ‘Jurassic Park’.

Jane set aside her suitcase and smirked. “You people don’t live here.” She ruffled Loki’s hair as she past him just to annoy the shit outta him.

Val did the same to Bruce but more as a ‘Hello’ to her little buddy than an annoyance.

“Neither does she.” Loki pursed his lips and pointed his hand towards Val with elegant grace. Darcy chuckled and threw a handful of popcorn into her mouth.

“That reminds me, Jane. Want to change that?”

Childishly, Darcy and Thor erupted in ‘ooooh’s of interest while Jane nearly tripped over the leg of a side-table. Val could see a curious look coming from Bruce who always seemed to understand her in the oddest ways. She shot a smile back to him. It was to reassure that she was ready for the kind of commitment that Bruce also feared sometimes in his own relationship.

Jane fumbled for words for a solid few seconds. “Hell yeah!” She chuckled and threw her arms around her girlfriend’s neck.

The happy couple was rewarded with happy shouts from Thor & Bruce, disinterested clapping from Loki & Darcy’s handful of popcorn being whipped at them like it was confetti or something.

Jane never felt more lucky in her life. She couldn’t believe someone as beautiful, strong & downright cool as Val was in love with her.

Val was also sure she was the luckiest girl in the world as she squeezed Jane to her body.

#a sequel!#my fanfiction #valjane #valkyrie #jane foster #thor love and thunder #thor ragnorak #Thor Odinson #bruce banner #lady sif #Loki Laufeyson #loki odinson #MCU #Marvel Comics #marvel #marvel cinematic universe #tessa thompson #natalie portman #taika waititi

4 notes · View notes

angelicthor · 5 years

Text

religion

pairing: thor odinson x reader

summary: set directly after Thor: Ragnarok (Infinity War? I don’t know her). You and Thor have always had a complicated relationship but when he comes to you years after disappearing telling you about the destruction of his home world, you’ll do just about anything to make him feel better.

warnings/genre: +18 only, smut, slight angst.

masterlist

a/n: thor deserves all the love in the world. i said what i said. send tweet.

Cause you’re my religion You’re how I’m living When all my friends say I should take some space Well I can’t envision, that for a minute When I’m down on my knees, you’re how I pray Hallelujah, I need your love

The hotel door shut behind you with a soft click and you placed your gun on the table beside your bed, the assignment was a success and you text Steve on your secure line to let him know, agreeing to meet up with him again tomorrow to head towards wherever you were needed next. The UN may have disbanded the avengers but that didn’t mean you weren’t still needed. People would always need protecting and there were things out there that police, militaries, and all the spy organisations in the world couldn’t combat.

You poured yourself a drink from the bottle of Jack stashed in your bag, stretching out the kinks in your back before you swallowed the bitter alcohol in one swig, recoiling slightly at the taste as your face contorted in disgust. Placing the empty tumbler on the side you advanced on the en-suite, carelessly leaving a trail of clothes behind you as you headed straight towards the shower, leaning against the bathroom countertop as you waited for the water to warm.

All things considered, you couldn’t really complain about your current setting; since you’d repudiated the accords you’d been forced to stay in much worse accommodation. You supposed it came with the territory of being a wanted criminal. At least in this hotel you got a window wall that let in natural light and opened onto a balcony overlooking the city. Yeah, you’d definitely been in worse places.

Stepping under the spray of the showerhead, you pressed your hand against the chipped tiles in front of you, bowing your head as you let the warm water wash away the stress of the day. Pushing your wet hair from your face, you finished your shower and reached for the towel on the rack before wrapping it around yourself and heading back into your room to retrieve your sleep shirt and shorts.

You furrowed your brows at the darkness of the room, you hadn’t bothered to leave a light on given that it was mid-summer and the sun was out in full force, not a cloud in the sky before you had entered the bathroom, but now the skies were a bleak grey, the sun nowhere to be seen and you could feel the beginning of a storm in the air.

Strange, you mused, you could have sworn the forecast was nothing but blazing sun for the next few weeks.

Deeming thoughts about the changing weather useless, you pushed them from your mind, drying yourself off and pulling the shirt over your head and shorts up your legs, hoping that the temperature didn’t drop with the lack of visible sun as they were all you had to sleep in. You had just pulled back the covers when the first strike of lightening hit, the powerful bright bolts of electricity splitting the grey sky apart, lighting up the room with its intensity before the rumbling roll of thunder shook the entire city.

The storm caused memories of days long gone to resurface in your mind. Memories you needed to forget. You couldn’t focus on them, not now, couldn’t focus on –

You needed to forget.

Unlike most in Berlin that night, the ruckus of the storm lulled you to sleep, the sound comforting and familiar providing you with the perfect ambiance for your well-earned rest, letting out a content sigh as your body melted into the mattress.

Some hours later, you jolted awake at a violent clap of thunder, disorientated as rain pelted against the glass, another fork of lightning splicing through the sky and lighting up your otherwise pitch-black room for only a moment. But it wasn’t that what awoke you. No, the all-too familiar feeling of someone’s stare burning into your body was what roused you from your sleep and you knew exactly who it was.

He was here.

Only his silhouette was visible against the bright flashes in the sky where he stood on the balcony, rain soaking him as he stood there unsure of himself. Heart-racing, uncertain as to why he was here but knowing that whatever happened must have been been bad, you slowly climbed from your bed, sliding the glass door open and stepping out into the cold night, clothes becoming drenched from the torrential downfall in mere seconds, but you didn’t even pay it any mind. Nothing else mattered now. He was back.

Your God of Thunder.

Your love.

Your Thor.

You had a complicated relationship with the Asgardian to say the least, never really knowing where either of you stood. Labels like teammate or friend would never be able to fully explain what Thor meant to you, you shared a bond far too deep and meaningful for such trivial categorisations. You were perfectly attuned to each other, both on and off the battlefield, you made a couple like no other, your biggest supporters when things went right and each other’s sanctuary when they did not. Your connection to Thor was unparalleled to anything you had every experienced in your life. But then he had to leave, trouble in other realms needed his attention and you didn’t know when – if he would return.

You wanted to go with him more than anything, but you were needed too much on earth, after Ultron it was too much of a risk for three of the avengers to disappear, and so you reluctantly stayed, heart aching as you came to a harsh truth: your fantasies of a life with Thor would remain entirely that – fantasies. He couldn’t leave the nine realms to fall into chaos, he couldn’t favour earth out of all them, regardless if he took his birth-right as king or not. That wasn’t in his nature. It was one of the reasons you loved him.

No, Thor’s place would always be with Asgard, protecting everyone in every realm. It had to be.

But he was here, face crestfallen and shoulders slumped forward in defeat, a sight even you had never seen on your thunderer before. You tentatively reached out to cup his face in your hand, noticing for the first time that the hair that was stuck down to his face was much shorter than when he left, his beard somewhat thicker than you remember but you gasped when you noticed the patch adorning his right eye, a jagged scar cutting through the soft skin of his cheek that resembled the very lightning he commanded.

“Thor,” You whispered, fearing if you were any louder you may startle the man. Squeezing his eye shut, Thor nuzzled into your palm, his larger hand coming up to cover yours before he met your gaze, eye bloodshot with unshed tears as the dam finally broke, his face crumbling as the weight of everything he had been through came crashing down on him and he collapsed in your arms, shoulders shaking as sobs tore from his throat, hands clinging desperately to your form as you quickly wrapped your arms around him in a comforting embrace, leading him into your hotel room and placing him on your bed.

Thor opened his mouth to speak again but no words came out, staring straight ahead of him as if he was processing a great deal unaware of where he even was. You quickly darted into the bathroom, pulling a dry towel from the rail and hurried back to Thor who had remained motionless.

You slowly approached him, afraid of startling him out of his stupor and gently knelt in front of him. You dabbed the towel along his brow, pushing his hair back to stop any more water from dripping down his face before you took notice of his t-shirt and jeans that clung to him like a second skin. Frowning at his state of attire, you gently pulled his face down to focus on you, thumbs massaging his cheeks in feather-light circles.

“Thor, honey, you have to take your clothes off ok? You’re soaking wet.”

He numbly nodded at your request but made no effort to move and so you did it for him, lifting the shirt off his body, and letting it fall to the floor with a thud, moving to undo his belt and slowly pull down his drenched jeans thankful when he lifted his bum of the bed to make it easier for you. You were thankful he had not worn his armour, knowing how difficult that would have been to remove, You pulled his shoes from his feet and placed them neatly together at the side of the bed, picking up his discarded clothes to dry in the bath, noticing the similar state of your own clothes and throwing them in there as well, leaving you naked before the God, not for the first time.

When you returned, Thor had the towel you had given him wrapped around his shoulders, clutching it tightly in his fists as more tears fell from his eye. Noticing you were back in the room, Thor quickly wiped his tears away and your heart twisted at the sight, he had to be strong for so many people but never for you – not like this.

“I went to the compound to try and find you, but no one was there.”

“The Avengers disbanded - it’s a long story, one that doesn’t matter to me right now,” You murmured, sitting beside Thor and tracing your fingers down his arm to try and relax him, “Thor what happened?”

“Asgard’s gone,” He choked out, burying his head in his hands as you gaped at him.

Asgard couldn’t be gone. That wasn’t possible. Was it?

“It-it was the only way we could defeat her, but it cost everything Y/N, everything.”

Thor told you everything about his sister who he hadn’t even known existed, the hidden history of his home and his father, how he’d died, and how Asgard really came to be, he told you of the prophecy – ragnarok – and how it came true, how his world, his home, was destroyed in fire and burnt to ashes, nothing remaining but the Asgardians on the ship that was currently cloaked and hovering over Norway.

You heart broke with every word he spoke; he’d been through so much, too much, and hadn’t been given a moment to process a moment of it. His pain and grief and anger all pouring from him as he finally unleashed what he had to keep restrained for so long.

Tugging on his hand, you turned him to face you, crawling up the bed to rest against the pillows, Thor automatically resting his head on your chest as he’d done many times before, his bulkier frame lying heavily on yours as he listened to the soothing thud of your heartbeat in his ear. Stroking your hands up and down his back, you worked out the knots and tension that were present in his muscles, nails lightly scratching the tanned skin as he wrapped his arms around your waist, holding you tightly to him.

The silence in the room was only disrupted by Thor’s ragged breaths and choked sobs until he mumbled something unintelligible where his head was buried in your chest, your hands stalling their ministrations on his back as you waited for him to repeat what he had said.

Lifting his head, Thor rested his chin on your chest as he stared up at you with bloodshot eyes, the sorrow and guilt he carried so visible in the lines of his face. “The Garden,” he repeated before elaborating, “My mother’s garden; it was the one place in all of Asgard that was entirely hers, it became her memorial after she passed and now – now it’s gone. Everything’s gone. The schools and sanatoriums and the palace and people’s homes, it’s all gone. I should have done more. I could have saved it, but I didn’t; I wasn’t strong enough.”

Thor shifted off you, sitting on the edge of the bed as he buried his head in his hands, gripping at the short strands of his hair. Try as you might you couldn’t understand his struggle. He’d been forced to do the impossible, watch his home, everything he had every known, be destroyed before his eyes because it was needed to be done.

So much had been torn from him and you didn’t know how to ease his pain.

Slowly you crawled behind him, kneeling on the bed as you wrapped your arms around his broad shoulders, littering kisses along his neck as you felt the taut muscles relax at the touch of your lips against his skin.

“You did what you had to do Thor, you saved your people and that’s what matters,” You pressed a kiss to his cheek as he lifted his head slightly to peak at you from the corner of his eye as you shifted to sit beside him. “You’re their prince and you did what a good prince should do, regardless of the cost, Asgard still lives in its people and that’s down to you love.”

Thor shot you a strained smile, cupping your face in his callused hand before he met your lips in a languid kiss, pouring his gratitude into the embrace, his tongue stroking into your mouth as he pulled you onto his lap. You pulled away, pressing a few gentle kisses to his lips as you rested your forehead against his, fingers carding through his short strands.

“They made me King,” He muttered against your lips and your actions stalled at the revelation.

You knew how big this was for him; Thor was destined to be King since he was born but ever since he had been banished to earth he had realised what a huge responsibility it was, his ego had deflated, and he was concerned with the weight of the role, that he wouldn’t be enough to be a good king. You knew he was afraid of letting his people and his family down again, but you knew better, you knew he would be an amazing king, his recent sacrifice was just proof of that.

Nothing you could think of would reassure him, you had no idea what to say to convince him that he could do this and make him believe that everything would be ok. But you did know how to distract him from all of this, even if it was for just a moment.

“King huh?” You whispered as you kissed along his jaw. “So, should I kneel before my King?” Your voice sultry as you slowly slid from his lap and sank to your knees between his spread legs.

Your hands stroked up and down his thighs, nails lightly nicking the skin as his muscles twitched under your touch, his length hardening in the confines of his boxers as you stared up at him with wide innocent eyes. “Y/N,” Thor sighed out, breath laboured and heavy as you kissed your way up his thighs, mouthing at his cock through the fabric of his underwear, his hands twitching at his sides as he yearned to cusp the back of your neck and manoeuvre you to where he desperately needed your touch. “You don’t need to do this.”

You hummed as you tugged down the rim of his boxers until his hard cock was freed, “But I want to.”

Without waiting for a response, you licked up his cock where it rested against his lower abdomen from the base of his shaft to the tip before wrapping your lips around the head and slowly working him further and further into your mouth, spurred on by the deep rumbling groan that erupted from deep within Thor’s chest.

You slowly began to bob your head up and down his thick length, hand working the part of his cock you couldn’t fit in your mouth, feeling him harden even more on your tongue as you traced the pulsing vein on the underside of his cock, flicking at the sensitive spot beneath his bulbous head as he gasped, his hips jolting into your eager mouth.

Thor pushed the unruly strands of hair back from your face, gripping the back of your head to help guide your movements as you stared up at him from where you were kneeling, watching his face contort in pleasure, eyes screwed shut as his bit down on his lower lip to stifle his groans, his chest rising and falling harshly as his skin gleamed with sweat.

With a grunt, Thor pulled you off him, lifting you off him as if you weighed nothing and attacked your lips with his, his spit-slicked cock caught between you as his hands wandered your body before settling on your ass. His lips trailed down your neck before nibbling at your collarbone, your hips rolling against his on instinct, your wet folds gliding over his cock making you both gasp.

“Y/N please, love, I need to be inside you,” Thor moaned, hands gripping your waist even harder.

You nodded eagerly, wrapping your legs tightly around his hips as he gently lay you down on the pillows, kicking his boxers off and positioning himself between your spread legs, propping his arms on either side of your head as he dipped down to capture your lips in a kiss, stroking his tongue into your mouth as you moaned at the contact, his hips thrusting against yours so the head of his cock nudged at your clit.

Thor cupped your cheek, forcing you to look into his eyes as he gripped his cock, trailing the head against your glistening folds before positioning himself at your entrance and slowly pushing forward, hooking your leg higher over his hip as he filled you, your breath hitching as you adjusted to the satisfying stretch.

You were both panting heavily at the feeling of being so intimately connected and you bucked your hips when you felt ready, needing Thor to move and you got your wish, a strangled groan falling from his lips as he began to roll his hips into yours in time with the echoing thunder outside. Your head fell back onto the pillow with a sigh as your back arched in pleasure, Thor holding you close to him with an arm around your waist as he laved your breasts with attention, suckling on your nipple as he began to thrust harder into you.

The springs in the bed began to squeak with every movement you made, the headboard banging against the wall in a steady rhythm as your high-pitched cries and Thor’s deep growls resonated around the room, the air between you charged with electricity.

Thor’s thick cock filled you perfectly, nudging against your g-spot with every thrust of his hips into yours, your toes curling as the pressure in your core began to build, hands clawing at the expanse of his bare back causing him to drive even harder into you, his hand moving to massage your breast, fingers tweaking at your nipple as his other hand trailed across your hipbone to circle your clit, his movements losing their finesse as he felt his end approach.

“Y/N, love, let go for me, please let go for me,” Thor pleaded, voice thick with lust as he felt you clench around his cock.

You buried your face in the crook of his neck as you release washed over you like a tidal wave, pulling you under until you were drowning in a sea of euphoria, wanton moans falling unabashedly from your lips as you released around his sensitive cock, cunt throbbing, triggering his own orgasm as his hips sloppily thrust into yours a few final time before he came with a shout, filling you with his cum as his body fell lax on top of yours.

The weight of his body crushing yours was a welcome comfort after being away from him for so long, the reassurance that he was real and there with you and his cock was still buried deep within you making a rush of warmth spread throughout your chest.

With a huff, Thor carefully pulled out of you before collapsing at your side, automatically wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you until you were pressed tightly against him, head resting over his chest listening to his racing heart as your legs tangled with his. His fingers stroked up and down your back as your own drew invisible patterns across his chest, the sound of the dying thunder and rain pounding against the glass the only sounds in the room apart from your ragged breathing.

“Thank you,” Thor murmured against your forehead, lips grazing the skin as he spoke.

You grinned as you cuddled closer to him; “Trust me it was my pleasure.”

Thor’s rumbling chuckle shook his chest as he lightly swatted at your ass. “Cheeky,” He chastised, voice laced with humour as he titled your head back to meet your lips in a passionate kiss.

“What’s going to happen now?” You whispered as he broke away, looking away from him in fear of the answer.

“I go back to my people,” Thor sighed, swallowing against the lump in his throat at the gargantuan task before him, “I’ll try to create a new Asgard, Ragnarok means the end but it also means rebirth. Our story isn’t over yet, maybe we can right the wrongs of our past.”

You nodded, tears brimming in your eyes at the thought of him leaving you once more, when the sun finally rose he would return to his people as their king and you would return to yours as their protector. You both had lives you simply couldn’t run from.

“Come with me.”

“What? Thor I-”

“I know you have responsibilities here and I’m not asking you to abandon them Y/N. Just come with me; Asgard is on Midgard now my love, the stars don’t separate us anymore, we can be together without ignoring our duties. I love you and I don’t want to be without you anymore so come with me.”

You were shocked at Thor’s proposal, staring up at him with wide eyes and a slack jaw, his own expression holding so much hope that you would say yes. Could this work? Thor was right, Asgard was on earth now, you wouldn’t be an entirely different realm away from where you needed to be. The possibility of being able to be with Thor caused your heart to race with excitement, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips as you looked up at the man you had loved for so long and you knew you weren’t going to let him go again. You couldn’t.

“Ok, let’s do it.”

#thor odinson x you #thor odinson x reader #thor x reader #thor smut #thor oneshot #angelicthorwrites

426 notes · View notes