tangentially related in my brainspace but I think suspension shibari would cure me
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shout out to “gross” disabled people.
people who can’t shower/bathe
people who can’t shave
people who can’t wash their clothes
people who need help going to the bathroom
people who have nasty habits (biting nails, picking nose, etc)
people who can’t brush their teeth
people who can’t go to the doctor
people who can’t clean their room
people who can’t make their beds
people who vomit a lot
people who wet the bed
people who constantly have diarrhea
people who’s physical deformities are seen as repulsive
and every other kind of person I missed that deserves to be here too.
you are people, first and foremost. your thoughts deserve to be heard, discussed, acknowledged, no matter what. you are not lesser. you are just another person. you should never be ignored for what you can/can’t do. you deserve care.
to abled people: check yourself. make sure you listen. and you can reblog, just don’t derail. maybe don’t add on, either.
EDIT: reblog this version instead, please.
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it's never too late to start brushing your teeth again. i basically never brushed my teeth for a whole 10 years. a decade. A DECADE. i still struggle to brush my teeth once a week, but it all started with brushing my teeth once every few months. so i mean it when i say brushing your teeth once a week, a month, a year, or even a decade, is better than nothing.
and still, nothing is not shameful. it is not immoral to struggle with self care. and it is also not pointless to keep trying. anything you can do, even if its wiping plaque off with a towel, is enough. it is good to take care of yourself however you can, even if it's just trying to muster the will to. reading this post is good, too.
i believe in you and i am proud of you, even in the smallest of steps. it's okay. you can give yourself grace.
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personal observations made by a new cane user:
you do not need to be in constant pain to own a cane.
folding canes have a clasp or band to keep them folded. losing the band is a pain in the ass.
you will get dirty looks
it does not matter what age you are. you will get dirty looks.
you have to hold it in the opposite hand as the disabled leg. this is fortunate, as I am right handed, so i hold it in my left hand to support my right leg.
people will try to steal your cane from you.
when standing still, I hold it in my right hand unless i need to do something right handedly. this does not work as well as i thought it would.
being visibly physically disabled is difficult. having a mobility aid will help with pain and movement, but some people don't get them because visible disability is treated with disgust.
if someone meets you for the first time, and you don't have your cane, then they will like you more, but they will not believe you are actually disabled.
if someone meets you for the first time, and you have your cane, they will not treat you the same.
the majority of other cane and mobility aid users I have met are homeless. I live close to a big city.
People do not want to see you being disabled.
you will not hear of the benefits of using a cane from anyone who does not use a cane.
no one will prepare you for the world of being visibly physically disabled. however bad you think we have it is usually not from the disability at all. I can deal with pain and I can deal with an indisposed left hand.
the hardest part of being disabled is the fact that no one will care until you make them care.
the disabled seats on trains are a suggestion
the disabled seats on buses are a suggestion.
you will have a different experience with using a cane than I have had.
your hand will become tired. you are using it as a leg.
your cane is legally a part of your body. this will not stop some people.
you are not your disability. but it will affect you.
i love you
theres always an invisible someone who has it worse. that person will not be affected or offended by your use of a cane. take the damn ibuprofen. put the folded cane in your bag. ask your friends for help. gd knows they need help sometimes too.
you will have to learn that things will be impossible to you. you may not run as fast anymore. you may not become a skater, like you always wanted to be. you may be left behind when everyone else runs ahead.
you deserve better.
your cane handle gets dirty. wash it.
some days pain is worse. some days you will feel it the moment you wake up.
no one deserves pain. the human condition is not to suffer. we deserve better. we deserve to be loved and not tolerated. we deserve to be seen better than from the corners of eyes. we deserve to be heard better than an afterthought at a meeting.
be quick to care for yourself. I love you.
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I’m not sure who needs to hear this but it’s normal and okay to be DISABLED by your DISABILITY.
Sometimes it is going to stop you from doing things, and that’s okay. Sometimes it’s going to get in your way or make you struggle or cause problems in your life. But that’s okay, that’s why it’s called a disability.
You don’t need to fight yourself or “not let it hold you back” because a lot of times it will, but that’s the point.
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big shoutout to disabled people who smell bad. disabled people who cannot shower regularly. disabled people who sweat a lot and it causes them to smell bad. disabled people who cannot apply deodorant due to mobility restrictions. disabled people who cannot do laundry regularly or at all, and end up wearing dirty clothes for a long time. disabled people who cannot clean their living space, and thus end up smelling bad themselves. disabled people who have any condition or disability that causes body odor. and any other disabled people who smell bad for reasons i didn't mention. i see you and i love you.
(this post is for all disabled people, including mental and physical disabilities)
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relapse is not a moral failure. substance use and addiction are not a moral failure. mental illness is not a moral failure. disability is not a moral failure. you have a health condition. you are struggling. recovery is not mean to be perfect, and if you're not in recovery, surviving is good too. i'm glad you're here, and i hope life treats you better soon. please know this is not your fault. you do not need to feel guilty over your own health.
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