people should be able to talk about symptoms that society has deemed “gross” or “weird”. disabled + chronically ill people deserve to be able to share their experiences and get support without judgement from able-bodied people.
i wanna give a big shout out to disabled people who use incontinence aids. you're not lazy, or gross, and using these things arent bad. it is not "admitting defeat" to use an aid. they are meant to empower us and improve our quality of life, and being made to feel shame for something beyond our control is isn't helping anyone.
when we say normalize disability aids for all disabled people, include incontinence aids alongside mobility aids, ear defenders, stim toys, hearing aids, and all the rest.
my heart goes out to people who were terrible at sports and always got left out of activities with friends. people who who couldn’t catch or throw a ball to save their life and were always filled with dread and humiliation in gym class. people who got made fun of because they couldn’t run the mile in gym and always got picked last for kickball. kids who always felt worthless and good for nothing, and literally feared going to a PE class. people who have actual trauma because of it. i know it wasn’t easy for us, and i’m sorry you went through that. but you made it to where you are now, and i’m so proud of you.
I would like to offer the non-disabled Viktor stans a few reminders in regards to disability and language regarding it.
1. The word cripple is derogatory. Comparing slurs can be inappropriate, but think of the culture of the word similarly to the f-slur. Both are/in the process of being reclaimed by their respective communities, and for someone outside of those communities to use it would be offensive and hurtful. And always remember — context doesn’t matter with slurs.
2. When referring to a non-disabled person, try not to use the term abled bodied/person. This implies that disability is strictly limited to mobility. This is untrue, and language like this (even used with no ill intent) perpetuates stereotypes in regards to disability. We are all different and all valid.
3. Lastly, if you are unsure about something regarding disability, please ask! Most of us would be more than happy to chat and answer questions. While it IS your responsibility to educate yourself, we appreciate your effort to learn and become a better ally. My page is always open for this, and there’s no “stupid” questions. Just be respectful and open-eared!
gentle reminder that just because you can survive without that mobility aid / medication / accommodation / etc doesn’t mean you should. If it improves your quality of life then you have every right to use it.
The "bad disabled" is an concept used by abled people to shame, discredit, denigrate disabled people or negatively qualify disabled people who doesn't fit their ableist expetations (ex: "someone who is really disabled wouldn't be proud of it/they would be ashamed of it. Therefore you are not really disabled."). This idea implies that they are bad disabled and good disabled people: Disabled people who does put into question our society (either by simply existing or by their political opinions) are inherantly bad and those who doesn't are inherantly good. Its in fits into the politics of respectability.
Flag meaning:
Black background: Being tired because of ableists and deeply hating them.
Pastel pink stripe: Militantism, speacking up & fighting against ableism/sanism, reclaiming slurs, etc.
Red stripe: Being proudly disabled, happy to be disabled, showing your disability.
White stripe: Refusing to mask your differences for the confort of abled/sane people. Being your true self.
Green stripe: Being useless/uneconomic. Being a "burden" and/or "dangerous" for society.
Cyan stripe: Not fitting into the preconceived idea sane/abled people think of your disability (ex: being an autistic person who doesn't fit the "autistic genius" stereotype).
Grey flame symbol: Hoping for a better future, healing from the trauma·s, finding a community and fighting against ableism/sanism together.
[Image ID: A flag with a black background and five horizontal lines of the same size. Their colors are, from top to bottom, pink, red, white, green and cyan. In the center of the flag there is the symbol of a flame in shades of grey.]
someone using a mobility aid is not a sign of weakness. someone using a mobility aid is not unfortunate.
mobility aids are amazing, positive tools. they improve disabled lives and empower their users.
people should be encouraged to use mobility aids if it would make their life better and safer for them, no matter their age, disability, or any other factor.
fibromyalgia culture is taking the canes/walkers = old people idea and throwing it directly in the garbage where it belongs. fibromyalgia culture is proudly using mobility aids at a young age
I’m proud to be Autistic and ADHD. My disabilities are not curses, nor are they superpowers, but they’ve made me who I am. Nearly every part of how I act, what I like, and how I perceive the world can be traced back to one or both of them. I as a person can not be separated from my disabilities. Me without autism and adhd is not me anymore. I can’t even fathom what that person would be like.
I’m proud to be disabled. I’m proud to be Autistic. I’m proud to be ADHD.
Some people pointed at the fact we do have flags!! I checked and turns out they’re cool looking! Here’s the one for disability pride that I found:
The first one has been made in 2019 by Ann Magill.
(ID: an image of one of the Disability Pride flag. The background is black, with blue, yellow, white, red and green lightning bolds in the center, one of each color. End of ID)
The dark gray/black represent these who die may it be because of their disabilities, negligence, suicide or eugenics, the blue is for mental illness, yellow for cognitive and intellectual disabilities, white for invisible and undiagnosed disabilities, red for physical disabilities and green for sensory perception disabilities! The lightning bolds represent the way that disabled people have to very often adapt their way to go in life in a unadapted society.
There is a second flag, made in 2017 by Eros Recio.
(ID: an image of one of the Disability Pride flag. There is three horizontal lines: the first one is a dark yellow, the second one is a light gray and the last one is a dark orange. End of ID)
The gold, silver and bronze represent each form of disabilities (physical, sensory, mental (intellectual & psychosocial)). It has been inspired by the Paralympic Games.
If there is more flag, please let me know I’ll be happy to learn about it!
i got my cane today, it’s pink and has a quad bottom. it’s cute, or as cute as a cane can be, and so far, even just having it open next to me without using it, I’m already seeing a change in how people are acting about me and my pain.
i feel a bit more human. my need for breaks during walks is now understandable and met with compliance and not sighs of annoyance. Im allowed to be hurt. Im allowed to be achy. Im allowed to be.