This is everything I want to be.
A study of every discipline in at least its discourse.
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Discovering the hidden treasures of Musee d'Orsay: Maurice Denis
'"La vie devient précieuse, discrète : les couchers de soleil ont une douceur d'anciennes peintures"
Translation: "Life becomes precious, discreet: twilight has the softness of old paintings."
Maurice Denis
- I saw this lithograph at the Musée d'Orsay last year, paired with a wee segment of a diary entry which reminded me of a quote by Jeanette Winterson:
“I have noticed that when all the lights are on, people tend to talk about what they are doing – their outer lives. Sitting round in candlelight or firelight, people start to talk about how they are feeling – their inner lives. They speak subjectively, they argue less, there are longer pauses. To sit alone without any electric light is curiously creative. I have my best ideas at dawn or at nightfall, but not if I switch on the lights – then I start thinking about projects, deadlines, demands, and the shadows and shapes of the house become objects, not suggestions, things that need to done, not a background to thought.” [Jeanette Winterson]
"To sit alone without any electric light is curiously creative." particularly strikes a chord, as well as "the shadows and shapes of the house become objects, not suggestions... not a background to thought."
There's a chance I misinterpreted the entire purpose of this art installation, but I like the direction it had me thinking in.
It sometimes feels odd and counter-intuitive to share subjective thoughts on a social network that runs on said 'electric light' with an audience focused on the 'outward', but I digress.
How strange to think that we almost halt specific thoughts/modes of expression because we, as a society, have accepted that we are to talk least about the things we think about most? But I digress.
Some other Maurice Denis pieces that I enjoyed:
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(Note to my Psychologist)
~ Saturdays~
Today is Saturday. Saturdays are one of the hardest days I have out of the week.
I feel extremely isolated from everyone, but not just anyone; myself. Saturdays where the streets aren't busy with traffic allowing the flow of thoughts to travel on different intervals.
Saturdays like to remain me over my loneliness. Saturdays likes for me to find ways to punish myself. Not just in a mental way, but physically. Saturday's tries make me hurt myself. It's easier to have physical pain than emotional. Saturday isn't like other Saturday's whom those who's health is enough log for the weekends on the weekdays. My Saturday are loud
But not in a rhetorical way, but of the metaphor version of my inner self. I am lonely... Lonely isn't exactly the wording I would like to use for this is more than loneliness; not easy to describe. This is torture, now that wording seems more adequate, yet not the right feel for my Saturdays.
Saturdays remind me how tired I am of myself, how tired I am to be alive, yet how afraid I am to simply just die...
I am sitting at my desk writing this silly little note on my silly little journal. Most probably I won't even show you. For if there is one thing you should of me.
I like to not say my complete version of my sentiments nor emotions.
You see as a child my voice was never heard. As an adult I've learn to half true.
I am tired of life. I am tired of feeling for half of what I feel is painful.
My brain didn't came wired with a shut down bottom for even at night I would and will cry myself to sleep. You see is the only way I've given in. The way to exhaust myself, mental and physically.
My body has no more option bottoms, no more pop up windows on its computer screen. There is no more reason to stay on. I've run out of battery to a critical 5%.
This is my melatonin...
Maybe I am depressed or maybe it is just...
Saturday
(note: I don't mind if you repost. Is ok I think a lot of us feel this way. I can't for say it will be ok. For I don't know if I will ever see the "ok" everyone talks about. But alone you are not)
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i need one of those jobs where i have to wear like business casual to work everyday cause if i can’t put on a whole outfit with line a trench coat and boots and a suit and everything and pretend to be an anime character what’s the point
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In one of the stars I shall be living. In one of them I shall be laughing. And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing, when you look at the sky at night...You - only you - will have stars that can laugh.
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