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levilxvr · 5 months

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levi nsfw alphabet🤭

a/n: this post is way longer than i expected lol

female reader btw

A - Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

aftercare is extremely important to levi. It’s a way of assuring you that you’re loved, as well as ensuring you’re ok and not hurt.

Will spend time to make you a cup of his favourite tea, take a warm, damp cloth to wipe both of you up and then lay back down beside you to cuddle<3

B - Body part (their favorite body part of theirs/ their partner’s)

levi loves your hands. Partly because its the easiest part of you to access especially when you’re with other people. He can hold them, caress them, play with them and kiss them- overall he just loves your hands a lot.

When you’re alone with him though, he loves your waist. He’ll run his hands along your sides and soak in the feeling of your curves under his palms, especially when hes spooning you.

C - Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

if you’re comfortable with it he loves cumming inside you,. there’s something about the way your pussy looks as his cum is dripping out that turns him on even more

If you’d rather he do it outside, he’ll probably shoot his load on your stomach or clit

D - Dirty secret

ok hear me out the first thing that comes to my mind when i look at levi is panty sniffer. Like you cant tell me he doesn’t love doing that😭

Especially when he’s helping you do the laundry- of course he’ll never admit it but sometimes he just, you know..like if it’s there he’ll take the opportunity. Kinda just stands there with the rest of the laundry pile in his other hand, letting his thoughts wander as he breaths in your scent.

E - Experience (how experienced are they?)

when he first met you this man had zero experience when it comes to sex. I mean, he’s busy with the scouts and all his other duties and probably never had time to think about how its actually done yk

The first time you and him got down to business he was kinda shy since he wasn’t really confident, but it all worked out in the end- he knows how it goes but just wasn’t sure how to make you feel good too. Over the years, his performance improved a lot and now he’s a complete freak in the sheets :) (i can confirm)

F - Favorite position

missionary is the way to go

he loves being able to see your face while he’s making love to you and can easily communicate with you while doing it. He also finds it the most comfortable for both of you (which is important)

he likes cowgirl too when he’s feeling more subby

G - Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

i’d say he’s more serious while having sex, but not in a bad way- its more of like, soft and romantic to him and he tends to be more sappy and all when you’re doing it. But he does giggle occasionally when he’s pillow talking with you after, cuz he’s happy to be with you and feels okay to show his vulnerable side <3

H- Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

levi takes grooming very seriously and always makes sure he’s nice and clean. Sometimes he’ll let it grow out a little more but he always ensures that at the very least it’s neatly trimmed and not all over the place. I feel like he wouldn’t shave it all off completely though because he hates the prickly feeling after that

Has a nice happy trail too (yummy)

I - Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

very romantic and soft. when it comes to sex, levi likes to keep it intimate and special. it’s a time for him to express his love for you and show you how much he treasures you, so he’ll be whispering praises, kissing you gently and telling you what he loves about you while doing it.

J - Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

normally he doesn’t masturbate unless you’re away from him for more than a week

usually he can control himself pretty well but once he reaches his limit, thats it. His hands are in his pants while he imagines it’s your pussy around his cock, jerking himself off to the thought of you. (Be prepared cuz when you reunite with him he’s getting down to it straight away)

it doesn’t satisfy him as much though, and he finds himself cumming lesser than when he’s with you

K - Kink (one or more of their kinks)

praise kink! he’ll never admit it but when you whisper in his ear, telling him how good he’s doing or how amazing he’s making you feel, it drives him insane. He just loves hearing words of reassurance from you <3

breeding kink as well. Especially post war, when you finally settle down with him and tell him you’re ready to start a family. lord he’s cumming inside you every night- and if any of it leaks out of your pussy he’s fucking it right back in. Also enjoys watching it ooze out though, bc then he knows he did a good job stuffing you full with his cum.

L - Location (favorite places to do the do)

bedroom for maximum comfort. its his favourite place to do it but if he’s working overtime in the office and you pay him a visit, be prepared cuz he’s probably gonna end up fucking you on the desk.

He likes to do it in the shower too for easy clean up

M - Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

levi seeing you wearing his clothes is a huge turn on. like especially when you’re in one of his oversized shirts wearing nothing underneath but a pair of panties- it’s like heaven right in front of him

french kisses also get him horny, actually. He can’t help it but every time you’re kissing and it turns really heated and passionate he feels himself hardening in his pants.

N - No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

he doesn’t like impact play. Be it spanking, hitting, going too rough to the point where it hurts, he’s not a fan of it.

other than that he’s honestly pretty open to trying new things if you want (but of course, he has limits)

O - Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

overall levi prefers giving, but wouldn’t mind if you want to suck him off too. He just loves eating you out though, you taste so good every single time and enjoys it when your hands are tugging his hair while he licks you up.

He’s really good with his mouth like man just knows exactly where to suck to make you cum in minutes.

When he’s receiving he likes to sit back with a hand behind his head, enjoying the sight of your lips wrapped around his cock, occasionally bucking his hips to gently fuck your mouth.

P - Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

it goes both ways tbh. generally if you’re just having sex for fun because one of yall are horny he can be pretty rough and fast. He loves hearing you scream his name as he pounds you against the bed or table, and you both get the best orgasms when he does it rough.

on certain days he tends to be softer and gentler with you, though. for instance when you return from an expedition or when the mood is just more romantic and intimate. Sometimes he likes to take his time pleasuring you, demonstrating how much he adores you as he carefully slides in and out. He can be really slow and sensual- just depends on the mood.

Q - Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

given his job, quickies tend to be quite a frequent occurrence in your relationship. Of course, levi prefers to do the whole thing nice and slow as much as possible, but sometimes he just can control himself and you end up indulging in a short session. Usually it happens in his office or the barracks.

R - Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks?)

experiment wise i feel like this man is really traditional and would prefer to just you know go with the flow. He isn’t really into trying out new things unless you really want to

levi loves taking risks though. Not anything that dangerous but sometimes he likes fucking you with his fingers under the table in a meeting, or doing it in semi public areas where other cadets could catch yall. it’s the thrill of it that turns him on even more.

also loves to test his pullout game smh. of course, you trust him and his reflexes but once you were both drunk and he nearly came inside you with no contraceptives on accident lmaoo

S - Stamina

lord.

he can basically last like 8-10 rounds at a time if you’re able to hold up that long. He’s got really good stamina. But if you’re really fucked out after a few rounds he’s totally okay with it :)

T - Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

he doesnt really like them tbh, i can see him not really understanding the point of em- like why use toys when his cock and fingers exist? So no he doesn’t own any but would be quite intrigued if you have any and show him how to use them (hes a visual learner)

U - Unfair (how much they like to tease)

teases you A LOT.

Will talk dirty beside you while you’re in a public setting with your friends around, caress your thigh, kiss your earlobe etc. and then walk away like nothing happened

in bed- before he even enters you there’s a moment where he just has to rub his cockhead against your clit for a little while, occasionally brushing against your folds as well until you’re begging him to just put it in.

V - Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Hm i imagine he’s pretty quiet tbh

levi looks like the kind that doesn’t wanna be too loud cuz he’s a little shy, but occasionally he lets out a few groans and breathy noises as he’s fucking you. He doesn’t talk a lot during sex as well so usually it’s just little curses between soft moans

Gets louder when he’s close and starts panting with every thrust he makes. That’s how you can tell he’s gonna cum soon, and eventually when he does, he goes silent for a second because it feels so good he can’t even vocalise it.

W - Wild card (a random headcanon)

levi’s a little insecure about his size sometimes. You always reassure him that’s it’s perfect- cuz honestly it’s a decent length but sometimes he’s just worried he doesn’t please you well enough. It definitely does though, and you make sure to prove it to him whenever you do the deed.

X - X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

realistically i’d say hes a solid 5.5 inches, cut, slight curve up at a nice angle, base colour #C4A484, tip is #FFB6C1 but turns darker when aroused. Also got a nice little vein running down the right side🤗

He’s more on the girthy side as well when he gets hard

Y - Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

it wasn’t high before he met you, on a scale of one to ten probably like 2 tbh

once he met you and actually had sex for the first time though..it sort of awoke something in him and now he can’t go more than a few days without releasing. His sex drive gets especially high on days when you get to go out for fancy dinners with the rest of the cadets. Seeing you in those tight fitting dresses always turns him on so much.

Z - Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

will never let himself fall asleep before you do. No matter how sleepy he is, aftercare always comes first and he makes sure you’re both cleaned up and comfortable before he gives in to sleep

Usually you guys pillow talk for a while before he begins to get sleepy but if you had a particularly rough session he can fall asleep the moment his head hits the pillow.

the end <3

#levi ackerman x reader #levi x reader smut #levi ackerman smut #levi smut #levi x reader #levi attack on titan #levi ackerman headcanons #levi thoughts #levi x fem!reader

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hijackalx · 6 months

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GALE NSFW ALPHABET

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

gale will insist on doing the clean-up himself. like cleaning up both u and him. it's just his gentlemanly nature 😇 i think he also will ramble about stuff completely unrelated while doing it too 😹😹 like while he's wiping off ur face or something with a warm rag he'll be saying shit like "hm. i wonder where tara is, haven't seen her in a while. probably off eating pigeons, i suppose" STOPP IM IN LOVE WITH HIM

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

i think he's pretty proud of his shoulders. they have good width to them and idk they just look nice and stronk 💪🏻 as for his partner, he is a thigh man. he lovvessss thighs. will kiss and squeeze them while u sit on his face. also, if ur AFAB, he will not ever hesitate to grab a titty 🤭

C = Cum (anything to do with cum,

basically)

not getting any specific places where he likes to cum. i think he will cum anywhere as long as it's on/in u. waitttt he probably does like to cum in ur mouth doe. and maybe to smear it on ur lips a little like some lip gloss 😊 LMAO

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

lowkey think he's a little bit of a voyeur ooohhh nasty boy. idk like i think hes into watching/hearing other ppl fuck but he is deeply ashamed of this so dont ever bring it up 😹😹

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

dawg. nobody can convince me his first wasnt mystra. sooo.... not SUPER experienced in terms of like... numbers...... but him and mystra was doing some freak shit....... i just know it.......

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

ugh this is a good question. i think he likes cowgirl. u have to hold his hands tho and make eye contact with him or just forget it gurl 🙄✋ he likes to admire ur body and watch u use him to get off

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

okkk gale can be a little silly sometimes but are we surprised ?? HES ALWAYS SILLY !! i think he switches between serious and goofy. he takes mess-ups and embarrassing moments pretty well and will never make u feel bad over them 🥺 like he'll use humor to make u feel comfortable and safe I NEED HIMMMMM FUCK

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

yeah hes pretty hairy. i dont think his hair is EXTREMELY thick tho. like he has fine, kind of curly kind of straight body hair? not a lot on his chest but he does have a happy trail, pubes, ARMPIT HAIR 🤤, and leg and forearm hair. i think it looks rlly good on his forearms too eugh.......

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

he can be really romantic if he wants to (which is most of the time) but like i said he can also be unserious. but that doesnt make it less romantic i guess ???? anyway yeah he'll even plan everything out. like the type of dude to light candles and lay rose petals and shit 😹😹 probably likes to have some wine beforehand to get yall in the mood better too

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

he will but i dont think he does often. if ur an option he prefers that. if not theres like a 50/50 chance he'll beat off. lowkey feel like he might debate on whether or not its too much work and if he should just go to sleep instead LMAO WAIT PAUSSEEEEEE MAGE HAND ????? yeah...... yeah gurl. if hes feeling lazy thats how its gonna go. prolly will close his eyes and pretend its ur hand

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

normally somewhere secluded like in a room together on a bed but if hes feeling spicy then somewhere with the possibility of getting caught 😏 maybe on a balcony somewhere or IN THE FUCKING SKY

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

i think hes pretty sensitive and in tune to teasing glances or accidentally-on-purpose touches. wordddsss too bro. loves dirty talk so much. especially if ur the one to talk dirty to him. ugh ok gemini vibes yall? yes or yes? anyway whisper things in his ear or say suggestive things in front of other ppl, like innuendo shit 😹

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

uhhh... umm.... uh

jk he wont do any noncon roleplay or anything like that. not sure if theres anything else tho 😭

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

wants to give and receive but has a preference for giving head like its probably his fav sex act 😭😭 yall know hes good af at it too and probably says nasty shit while hes doing it

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

he'll adjust depending on what u want. but if ur riding him he likes when ur more sensual that way he can admire ur body a little better

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

doesnt seem like a quickie guy to me. like i said he likes to plan it out most days.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

😐

yes. hes a freak yall

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

if he does most of the work then he wont want to go another round but if its u then he probably will. i think it just depends on his mood too. if ur not satisfied yet tho he will use mage hand or projection gale to help 😹😹

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

i think he likes to tease a generous amount. he can dish it out but cant take it tho he gets flustered pretty fast lol

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

not extremely loud but will moan/whimper whatever. hes not afraid to make noise like not ashamed at all but i dont see him being obnoxious lol. mostly just talks tho LMAO

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

hes pretty much always thinking nasty but not always horny. he just like me fr. prolly not trying to smash often tho cuz he likes to plan ahead and make everything perfect. will fuck maybe 3 days a week unless ur really raring to go 😭

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

will prolly catch up on a book afterwards for a while before going to sleep. this is so comforting to me tho like what? imagine being all fucked-out and snuggy while ur bae reads their lil book and looks after u while u sleep.... need

#added a lil picture for yall is that nice ?#baldurs gate #gale dekarios #gale bg3 #gale headcanons #gale of waterdeep #headcanons #x reader #gale x tav #gale x reader #my headcanons #baldurs gate 3 #bg3

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muwapsturniolo · 2 months

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Matt nsfw abcs next please???

✯Matt Sturniolo NSFW ABC's✯

Summary: same as before, yall know what it is.

Warning: a lot of sub matt ideas because that's my new obsession.

chris version

✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Call me crazy but I don't believe he is the most overcaring aftercare person a lot of us write him to be. I feel like he would just ask if you're good, cuddle you, and turn on his tv or go on his phone to watch something with you by his side.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

matt loves his hands (me too i have a thing for hands). he knows you like them too. he's caught you staring at them when he's driving, putting on rings, or drinking out of a cup. he loves when they are wrapped around your neck or fingering you.

as for you, he loves your boobs ;) he loves sucking on your nipples and leaving hickeys on them. he loves fucking them and damn near suffocating himself in them.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

this freaky fuck loves to cum on your boobs. he will cum, use his cum as lube to fuck them, bust another nut, then lick his cum off of them.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

he used your vibrator once while you were gone. he got curious and decided to try it out when he saw a video, and he became obsessed. he ended up buying the same vibrator and uses it at home.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

i think its the same as chris. one or two bodies but you really had to teach him.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

missionary or cowgirl. goes without saying. he needs to see your boobs and your face.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

he's not goofy at all. i don't even know what to say for this because i can't see him doing anything funny during sex.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He is groomed nicely, not clean shaved but he leaves hair as well as a happy trail.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

depending on the occasion, hes very romantic. soft kisses to your collarbone as he thrusts into you, making sure to give you the praises you deserve for being such a good and loving girlfriend to him.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

going back to the letter D, he uses a vibrator to masturbate. he starts off at the lowest setting at the base of his dick, teasing himself. every other minute he turns up the vibration before he shoots his load on a pair of panties you left at his house.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

i don't categorize it as a kink but he likes being the sub. its something about you being in charge and telling him what to do that turns you on.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

car or your room. car because he likes having you ride him in the driver's seat and your room because he doesn't ever have privacy at home.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

ok hear me out.... when you catch an attitude with him. he could say something a bit crazy and you will shoot him a look before saying "Who are you talking to? cause i know its not me Matthew. fix your attitude" and he's immediately bricked up and ready to apologize by eating you out.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

no pegging and hes not sharing you. the thought of having to share you makes him want to curl into a ball and cry.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

they dont call him matt the much for nothing. this man eats you out for his pleasure. he loves the way you taste and the way you feel on his tongue.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

the few times he's in control he likes to go slow, making sure he's taking care of you. if you're in control he likes it rough and sensual with a bit of a fast pace.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

he doesn't like them. he prefers for the both of you to take your time with each other.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Clearly, i gotta write a imagine about this because I have such strong feelings about this. he loves the idea of you catching him using your vibrator on himself. just the idea of you catching him gives him an adrenaline rush.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

if you're edging him he can last for half an hour. if you let him cum once or twice with no edging that's all you're getting.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

i already gave it away but yes, he loves toys. he loves your vibrator, and he loves handcuffs.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

he likes to fuck with you in public. he will be extra flirty and touch you to rile you up. only for him to act shocked when you whisper in his ear to stop fucking with you before he regrets it.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

he's a whiny little bitch. soft pants as he begs for you to let him cum

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

he doesn't like rope. when he's tied up he prefers handcuffs or you to use his bandanas. its something about rope that makes the session to scary for him.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

he is a good 6 inches, soft and hard. he's not that big in circumference but he knows how to use it.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

his sex drive is moderate. i don't believe he wants sex all the time but if you want to have sex he's always up for it.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

if its a rough session the both of you fall asleep immediately. if its a soft session then both of you are up for a good thirty minutes before knocking out

✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯ ✯

TAGLIST🍑

@bernardsgf @bernardsleftbootycheek @blahbel668 @mattfrfr @gdsvhtwa @sturniolo-aali @lily-loves-struniolos @kynda-avery @causeidontlikeagoldrush

@st7rnioioss @carolinalikesthings @mattslolita @suyqa @xxloveralways14 @pepsiimaxx @judespoision

@ivonchetooo1239 @imaslut4kehlani @that-general-simp @m4stermindd @itzdarling @gigisworldsstuff @adoreindie @braindead4l @pettydollie @chrissgirlsstuff @alexis007 @ratatioulle

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pasta-in-the-pudding · 7 months

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HIIIIIIIIII I LOVE YOUR WRITING🩷🩷🩷

anyways this is my first time so don’t bully me😭

Can i request hcs with a killer gn reader thats like kobeni from chainsaw man? Like they’re a wimp and a little bit of a crybaby but is good at killing and skilled with weapons specially a knife? You can choose any of the killers!

Have a splendid week and always stay hydrated!!🩷🩷🩷🫶🫶🫶

Don't worry i would never bully any of my dear readers <333

Thank you so much for requesting!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Toby

It honestly shocked Toby when he saw you fight for the first time

He always knew you as sort of a wimp, breaking down into nervous babbles and tears at the slightest hint of conflict

But here you are, almost completely unemotional, and beating these people senseless

It is only once you're done that you begin to panic, which takes Toby aback even more

Toby didn't even have to lift a finger on this mission, because you took care of it all, but now you're....crying??

He rushes to your side and kneels by you on the floor "w-woah hey, are you ok?" He asks

You only manage to get out nervous babbles, which only worries toby more

He ends up calling Tim (because while he may be an adult, he needs a more adultier adult in this situation)

Tim concludes that you're just having an anxiety attack and should be back to normal within a few hours

Tim ends up carrying you back to his car and lays you down in the back seat, while tony watches over you

Toby doesn't leave your side until he is sure that you're ok, and don't need him to comfort you any longer

And from that point on, he doesn't let you do anything that may push your anxious self over the edge

Eyeless Jack

You are one of Jacks most frequent visitors

He is always there, tending to your minor wounds while you panic and shake with fear

He doesn't talk to you much, since you are almost never in a state to talk

But the few experiences he's had with you have always been pleasent

You are always very kind, and he loves the fact that you have basic manners

He is almost never out on the battlefield himself, but he has heard rumor of your skill

Honestly, its one of those things hed have to see to believe

A shy, timid little thing like you?

Killing people?

Emotionlessly, no less?

Yeah, he just doesn't buy it, sorry

However if you were to show him your skill some day (wether that be through a creep videoing you, you training with him, etc) he would be thoroughly impressed

He just didn't expect something like that from you!

Jeff the killer

He's kind of mean to you <//3

Unless youre just really close, he won't go out of his way to be nice to you, even if you are sensitive

If you call him out for it he will say "what are you gonna do? Cry about it?"

And don't think he hasn't seen your meltdowns, because he definetly has

He's not a complete ass, so he won't poke much fun at you for those

Much....

However, if you were to show off your skill one day that would shut him up pretty good

Even if you broke down after the fact, he wouldn't pay much attention to that

He's still in shock from the coolness he just witnessed

From that day on he's a lot easier on you

He won't make fun of you for being sensetive, he will only make an annoyed sigh if you start getting emotional, and he'll help you out more around the manor if you need it

And if you get close to him he might even let you show him some knife techniques

Thats a big maybe though

Don't count on it

#creepypasta #slender mansion #creepypasta x y/n #creepypasta x you #creepypasta x female reader #ticci toby #ticci toby x reader #toby erin rogers #ticci toby x you #jeff the killer #jeff the killer x male reader #jeff the killer x reader #jeff the killer headcanons #jeffery woods #eyeless jack x male reader #eyeless jack x you #eyeless jack x reader #eyeless jack creepypasta #eyeless jack

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stargirlie25 · 2 months

Text

Me having a conversation with an e/riel. Feel free to fact check by looking at the books.

Me: Why do you ship Elain and Azriel?

E/riel: Well for starters, he was the only one to go save Elain when she was in hybern.

Me: First of all, Cassian offered first. Second of all Feyre was also there and saved her (what Elain said)

E/riel: Ok but still it was romantic

Me: But it was not. Because her sister ALSO saved her :) Feyre went to UTM and got tortured,SAed,killed people and died all for Tamlin anyhow...

E/riel: Well Madja said a mate knows whats wrong with their own mate and Az figured out that Elain was a seer.

Me: Elain being a Seer was not what was wrong with her. Also Rhysand figured out Nestas power.

E/riel: Az gave Elain truthteller when he had given it to no one ever.

Me: Only because Mor begged him with tears in her eyes to stay back. Cassian offered her first (again) and then Az offered her TT bc he would not have to use it. Not to mention, Elain only took it when Feyre assured her she would not have to use it. She gave it back without a glance

E/riel: Well Feyre imagined Elain and Az as ´´Death and his lovely fawn´´

Me: Okay. Well did you also catch when she said TT is the only connection between them? Not to mention something admirable about Elain is that she is always full of light. What literally takes away Light? Darkness=Azriel. Not to mention, Azriel is death and his home sucks the life from Elain. Not that Feyres aesthetic painting mind matters anything to me :)

E/riel: What about the fact that Lucien thought Elain was crazy?

Me: What about the fact when he travelled all around to find somebody on a quest so dangerous and the only confirmation he got was from Elain?

E/riel: Elain was wearing Cobalt blue the first time she met Az.

Me: Considering Elains devotion to Graysen, there is a high chance of her wearing that color for Graysen because his crest is cobalt blue. Even if its not true, Lucien wears a coat that´s fawn brown (exact same shade of Elains eyes)

E/riel: A smile and blush bloomed on Azriel in regards to Elain.

Me: Dont care. Thats just an action. Although since you say that, did you know that a smile bloomed on Elains face after her father died (who she loved dearly) in regards to Lucien?

E/riel: What about when a charged glance went through Elain and Azriel.

Me: Sexual attraction. Lots of characters have it like Feyre and tamlin,Aelin and Chaol,Azriel to Mor....

E/riel: Well, Azriel jacks off to Elain every night while looking at the gift he got for her.

Me: Dont be shy you dont have to say a gift. You can say he jacks off to headache powder. No problem. Almost like when Nesta slept with multiple men. Trust me, that does not affect me!

E/riel: Elriel is true mates because Az was the only one to smell Eluciens bond.

Me: Bryce smelled Nessians bound, Ruhn and Lidia smelled bryce and hunts bond, Tamlin smelled feysands.

E/riel: Gwyn is a lightsinger because Az chest sparked because of her.

Me: Well than ig Lidia and Bryce are lightsingers too. Get those evil bitches away from Hunt and Ruhn right?

E/riel: There is nothing romantic for Gwynriel

Me: Thats literally just your penny for thought. Why would i care when SJM provided common banter, mate language and history for Gwynriel, and scenes where they challenge each other when she said history,sparks,conflict,and challenge all makes a good couple.

E/riel: Elain gave two gifts to Az. Not lucien

Me: Headphones for Az bc Nesta and Cass fuck so loud? So romantic i cant! Im so glad my girl SJM is saving the good,meaningful gifts for Elucien.

E/riel: Az waited for Elain to come to the table and told everybody to not eat until Elain came back.

Me: he was thinking of his mother being a slave. Thats what the situation of eating when Elain was tending to everyone reminded him of. How his mother was treated. Its not romantic but it is a very sad thing to think about.

E/riel: Azriel loves Elain. He only has not thought about a future with her because he does not allow himself to!

Me: Honestly i don´t mind that you think that! Although that is not canon. Sleeping with Elain is the only thoughts he PLEASURED himself to. Not allowed himself as some say. Again, that´s just your penny for thought. He says ´´He hadn't gone that far with his planning´´ Meaning sexual thoughts is fine but anything further is like nope, nope,nope,nope,nope too far.

E/riel: Elain literally loses her newfound boldness around Lucien.

Me: There is so many more reasons that we could come up with than what meets the eye. Have you considered it was because she didnt know what to do. Or she saw the look on Lucien ´ s face and shrank because she did not intentionally cause it and felt bad? Or maybe she FELT Luciens pain and shared it because of the bond? So much possibilities to think of especially considering we have limited text and not the actual characters POV. Also i wonder how far she will shrink when she finds out about Az and Rhysands conversation in the bonus chapter. Or maybe she heard it already?

E/riel: Azriel actually gets Elain.

Me: The way he literally does not though! When Elain begs the IC not to kill graysen Az says its best for him to be killed in acosf. When Elain says nesta cant make choices for her and then Az says she should not be exposed to the innate darkness even though later we figure out Elain is willing? When Elain says she is not a child to be fought over and than Az says he will defeat Lucien in a blood duel with her?

E/riel: Scrying is dangerous! Of course Azriel did not want her too.

Me: Yet, he said ´´Nesta really should do scrying´´ but not Elain because he underestimates her. Which is the ONLY thing SJM provides to what Az could have been doing.

E/riel: Azriel listened to Elains laugh probably because he loves the sound!

Me: Maybe its because Elain never ever laughs like that around him or the ic He was literally monitoring them which means to keep tabs on someone which directly relates to his fricking job 😂. So many words to choose from and SJM chose monitoring.

E/riel: Az gave Elain a rose necklace.

Me: Ok and? Elain gave it back. She does not want that shit. He gave it to another person. It felt wrong to clasp it around Elains neck but it sparked something in his chest and made him smile for Gwyn.

E/riel: Lucien only sees Elain for his mate but Azriel sees her for her.

Me: Nope. His reason for wanting to kiss Elain was simply ´´What fi the cauldron was wrong´´ and refers to Elain as the 3rd. She is literally a theory or more so a possibility to him. One he has not thought through in the slightest. Also, Lucien was going crazy in hybern in regards to Elain before he knew of their bond AND Elain has not accepted the bond yet he still cares for her.

E/riel: Elain called Azriels scars beautiful.

Me: first of all, its a 50% chance she called his scars beautiful. Feyre said she was not sure which one she was complimenting, the scars, or the big glowing cobalt siphon atop his hand. Second of all, even if it was 100% fact that she said his scars specifically was beautiful, it seems he does not believe it at all. He tries to not to look at his hands. He does not want to taint her with his presence or touch her beautiful skin with his scars.

E/riel: His shadows vanish around Elain and lightens. They also do that around mor who he was in love with for 500 years. Also his shadows are like snakes ready to strike in regards to Elain.

Me: Shadows lighting and vanishing are the same thing. Light takes away darkness as darkness takes away light (another reason why they are horrible together) His shadows are losing its darkness around Elain and Mor. Mor was wrong for him. The amount of pain it caused him to be in Love with her? Want that to continue with Elain and Az? Azriel does not need his darkness to be hidden. He needs it to be embraced *insert Gwyn*

E/riel: SJM would never pass on a good angsty trope like forbidden love!

Me: firstly, the only thing forbidding e/riel is Elain herself. If she rejects the bond, she can be with Az all she wants and NO ONE has a say on that. Not Rhysand. Not feyre. Not cassian. Not Lucien himself. Although she hasnt after 2 years. There is an answer to why. Its not like Elain knows she has to wait until her own book to reject it. Second of all, Forbidden love is the absolute WORST trope to give BOTH of them. For Elain, she has always hid in the shadows of her sisters in the series and the fandom. You really think Elain Archeron always full of light wants to hide in the darkness and play out Azriel´s fantasies? As for Azriel, he has been secretly silently in PAIN loving Mor for 500 years. So you want him to go through it again with Elain? No. He wants the bond nessian and feysand have. The love they share. The joy of being with your equal. The connection of a mating bond. Being proud to showcase it to the world. Forbidden love would just tear them apart.

E/riel: SJM does not write about virgin romances! Plus Gwyn is a virgin!

Me: Yes she can. Gwyn already lost her virginity against her will so biologically she is not going through the bleeding and the actual losing her physical virginity. Although it is a fact she has never slept with someone. The scene where Cassian *ahem* first enters nesta is very descriptive and SJM describes the pain of Cassian entering her......So yes she can for sure write about Gwyn having sex. This is also goes against the statement that Gwyn cant have sex because of her trauma. False. She is interested in romance books and asks Nesta if the sex was good. I think Gwyn would enjoy sex with someone she trusts in and out.

#anti elriel #anti e/riel #anti elainxazriel #anti azriel and elain #pro elucien #pro gwynriel #elucien #gwynriel

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phefics · 2 months

Note

congrats my darling!! you deserve it 🥺

🍪 could i request a nsfw alphabet with robin? 💖

𝐨𝐩𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐚’𝐬 𝟏𝐤 𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 // omg tysm love, of course u can!!! i have answered a few of these questions about her so i just copy-n-pasted my previous answers for some xoxo

a: aftercare (what they’re like after sex) very cuddly, rambles a lot about how much fun it was and how hot you are, giggles at the messy sheets, and probably wants to stay up talking after.

b: body part (their favourite body part of theirs/their partner’s) to quote steve harrington, "you like boobies" ... robin likes boobies but also thighs.

c: cum (anything to do with cum basically) robin gets really wet, which she initially thought was a bad thing until you assure her that it's a really good thing.

d: dirty secret (a dirty secret of theirs) the obvious answer would just be her liking girls but if you’re fucking her, you already know that, sooo i’d say its maybe her inexperience - robin prides herself on her intelligence and ability to get shit done regardless of her nerves, but admitting that she has never even kissed anyone is something she would be embarrassed to do, especially if she’s trying to impress you

e: experience (how experienced are they?) she is completely inexperienced, like, has never even kissed a girl before you!

f: favorite position (this goes without saying) robin likes to have you sit on her face, or to just lay between your thighs. if a strap is involved, she likes to fuck with whoever's being penetrated on top.

g: goofy (are they more serious/humorous?) tries to be serious but ends up giggling and being silly

h: hair (how well groomed are they are, etc.) robin isn't big on shaving but she does definitely keep herself trimmed.

i: intimacy (how they are during the moment) robin is giggly, talkative, and completely lovestruck.

j: jack off (masturbation headcanons) robin really doesn't masturbate?? she's inexperienced and a little behind when it comes to sexual awakenings - she figured out she was a lesbian like two years ago, ok?? and she doesn't really understand...how...and would probably need to read it in a book or have it demonstrated on her.

k: kink (one or more of their kinks) personally, i don’t see robin as super kinky, or at least, she’s not super experienced/informed and therefore wouldn’t know much about what she’s into. however, i can see her being into dom/sub dynamics (i think she’s more of a sub) and some of the more common things like edging and praise. i also think she has a tickle kink but that is just me projecting ajdkdjkdf...

l: location (favorite places to do it) robin would never risk getting caught in public, for many reasons, so her favorite place to do it is in bed - classic, comfortable, intimate, and safe from prying eyes

m: motivation (what turns them on, gets them going?) robin is turned on by just about everything you do, but she is motivated by the idea of pleasuring you, like, getting down on her knees to go down on you like a woman starved. she has a people-pleasing tendancy that definitely extends to the bedroom.

n: no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) robin doesn't like behind restrained or hurt in the bedroom, mostly because of the whole russian spy thing, but even without the added trauma, it just really isn't her thing.

o: oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) robin loves oral sex from both ends. she prefers it to fingering and before getting more sexually involved, i feel like she didn't really consider that straps were a thing and assumed oral was the best-case scenario.

p: pace (are they fast and rough/slow and sensual?) robin likes to take things slow. when she's nervous, her instinct is to be frenzied, so she prefers to calm herself and do everything slow to savor it.

q: quickie (their opinions on quickies) robin prefers to just have sex in a more typical, vanilla way. in bed, take things slow, lots of kisses...so nah, quickies aren't her thing.

r: risk (are they game to experiment?) robin is down to experiment with most things, but she prefers to stay in her comfort zone most of the time, since sex is still new and intimdating for her.

s: stamina (how many rounds can they go for/long do they last?) robin is able to go for a long time, and can have multiple orgasms like most vagina-owners can - she can keep at it for a while.

t: toy (do they own toys/use them? on a partner/themselves?) robin is rlly into toys!! she loves strap-ons, whether that’s being fucked by one or fucking someone else. vibrators are also great, she has a tiny one of her own that she masturbates with, but using it with a partner would unlock a whole new world of fun!!

u: unfair (how much they like to tease) robin isn't good at trying to be a tease, because she will likely give in before her partner, lol.

v: volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make) robin is loud and talks a lot, she can’t help it - it’s sometimes nervous rambling and sometimes mindless babbling from pleasure

w: wild card (a random headcanon) self-indulgent one here, apologies - robin is super ticklish and often will accidentally laugh and twitch during sex when you touch her too gently or in a senstive spot. luckily, that isn't a turn-off for her, it just flusters her, so if you didn't mind, it could be something fun to play with...

x: x-ray (let’s see what’s going on in those pants) robin has a pretty bush, it's dark and doesn't match the curtains yknow?? her pussy is a dark pink and gets wet so easily, she's almost always glistening by the time her pants are off and you can spread her lips...

y: yearning (how high is their sex drive?) robin has been yearning for a relationship for so long, when she finally has it, she wants to fuck whenever humanly possible. it's not even that her sex drive is high, it's more like trying to make up for lost time.

z: zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) robin is pretty hyper and struggles to sleep most nights anyway, and sex doesn't really tire her out as much as it probably should, so she'll be down to stay up and hang out afterwards.

#💌 𝐈𝐍𝐁𝐎𝐗.#ophelia’s 1k celebration #reidsbtch #robin buckley imagine #robin buckley smut #robin buckley x reader #robin buckley #stranger things hcs #ophelia's headcanons

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caterkinnie · 2 years

Note

Hi! If that's okay could i request the first years reacting to the MC being liked by Lucius? Like, every time they got class the cat hops off Trein's lap to go snuggle with them and Trein just lets them? (Ofc as long as they're doing their work n all but still)

Lucius' second favorite human.

❥ ⌗ characters: Ace Trappola, Deuce Spade, Jack Howl, Epel Felmier, Sebek Zigvolt.

❥ ⌗ tags: crack/fluff, romantic not specified if it's an established relationship or mutual pining, mentions of jealousy but it's funny, not proofread, kinda Ace and Sebek slander but its ok cuz i love them

❥ ⌗ a/n: written from the perspective of a cat owner!

Ace is jealous.

Constantly bothers you about how annoying Lucius is and how he approaches you because you're just as annoying or something like that. It's stupid I know. But he lowkey wishes Lucius liked him too.

Not because he likes cats. I mean, Ace can stand them, but in reality this idiot just wants to brag about professor Trein's infamous cat liking him too. And also he wishes you gave him attention too in class, since Ace constantly bothers you and tries to talk to you, but you tell him to shut up and pay attention and he just goes angry cat mode.

His nagging gets worse whenever Lucius is in your lap.

Deuce is also jealous, but he's not an stupid idiot like Ace <3 (affectionate)

He goes all 'pspspsps c'mon kitty…' but is instantly rejected by the cat who is totally ignoring him.

Constantly asks you tips about how to approach a cat, since he gets a bit scared of… scaring it. He thinks it's his fault Lucius doesn't like him, animals were scared of him back then anyways…

He takes it so seriously like please Lucius is just mean please.

Jack is… uncomfortable. A bit.

He assumes you might just attract animals since this is unusual behaviour from Lucius, does this… also affect him?

He wishes you would also pet him, you WILL never know. He hates being jealous of a cat and he knows you would gladly rub his ears if he asked… but he's not going to ask. That's one of the reasons he feels slightly uncomfortable.

The other reason is obvious, I don't think I have to say it.

I don't think Epel is a huge fan of cats, he can stand them, but I personally think he's more of a dogboy.

He just thinks seeing you with Lucius is cute, and doesn't mind a lot. Has tried to pet him before and almost got scratched… so he personally does not like Lucius, and sometimes worries about him absolutely betraying your trust because cats are just like that (from a cat owner)

In general, Epel doesn't think much about it.

Sebek has been attacked by Lucius multiple times, deserved.

He's everything a cat hates, he's loud and doesn't know how to deal with a cat.

To make it even worse he goes all THIS THING WILL DISTRACT YOU when Lucius is around like the theatre kid he is, grabs Lucius and gets instantly attacked.

After a while he reluctantly accepts that his efforts for separating this cat from you are completely useless.

Sebek doesn't completely hate Lucius, but it's just… ok let's admit it he's jealous. He's physically mentally spiritually unable to admit he's jealous but it's just so obvious he doesn't like it too much when you're paying attention because of that dumb cat! Now he will have to help you re-study because you were focused on the cat— no, it doesn't matter if you were paying attention, m-maybe you missed something, so he's the only one capable of helping you!

#twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland imagines #twst #disney twst #twst headcanons #ace trappola #ace trappola x reader #deuce spade x reader #deuce spade #jack howl #jack howl x reader #epel felmier #epel felmier x reader #sebek zigvolt #sebek zigvolt x reader

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crushedsweets · 2 months

Note

hey sucker! 😋😋

what would the creeps do for valentine’s day?

like yknow, would some be given small treats or do others treat it like a regular day?

happy belated valentines day! hope you guys had fun and shared some love with everyone around you! this is the closest youre gonna get to x reader content from me.

AGAIN THIS IS SET IN MY AU!!! MY AU IS PRETTY DETAILED AND HAS AN OVERARCHING STORYLINE WITH PRE-ESTABLISHED FRIENDSHIPS, SETTINGS, JOBS, CHARACTER ARCS AND WHATNOT....... so :3 yeah.

Tim and Brian probably don't do much. They'll totally grab some chocolates/candy and eat it, but just cuz its there, not as a gift. if they had a partner, they'd just go get some dinner.. flowers, basic stuff. put on an unironed button up and pick their partner up LOL.

toby might do something depending on where he is in the story. early on, he is not doing SHIIIIT. deep into his friendship with nina(who opens up a lot of his emotional vulnerabilities n stuff), he might feel a little inclined to pick up some flowers for some of the girls in his life (nina, clocky, kate, lazari) just cuz he used to do something small for his sister/mom when he was younger (cuz frank never did shit). if he had a partner, he'd def wanna do jewelry and classic flowers. he likes necklaces and rings and piercings and stuff, doesnt wear them much cuz they get in the way, but likes seeing people wear stuff he got. he's the type to make them turn around so he could put the necklace on them, but if they even slightly laugh at him trying to be sweet, he's getting mad HAHA. "ok nevermind im returning this you fucking suck" (jokingly.. but he is embarrassed). would just wanna stay home though, no nights out or anything

clocky would paint stuff. she'd give nina a portrait of herself cuz nina loooves being someone's muse, do some nice art of forest creatures and leave some notes for toby. she'd feel pretty awkward about it just cuz even when she was with her highschool boyfriend, she wasn't good at giving or receiving affection. if she's gifted any flowers (which she will be getting), she's absolutely pressing them and either sealing them in some paintings, or putting it in frames that hold her old art/art she picked up at thrifts. if she had a partner, she'd obviously paint them or something. i could see her spending a long time working through a journal to gift them, making every 3 pages a painting, drawing, or journal entry expressing something. "today you and i went to get lunch. i think the place was way too expensive, but you liked it." and then empty pages for her partner to fill in with whatever they want.

nina. ok come on. lets be serious. its nina. she's gonna buy everyone(as in toby, clocky, kate, jane, liu) one expensive gift (cologne, watches, shoes, jewelry, makeup) and then throw together mini bouquets, notes, and probably shop lift other smaller stuff cuz 'IM BROKE I SPENT TOO MUCH I HAVE TO' LOLLL.. she's the type to literally decorate her house for it, putting up some of clocky's more romantic paintings (cuz she has a collection of clocky's work), setting out heart-shaped coasters, bringing out heart shaped pillows.... honestly she probably already had those.... she'd absolutely plan galentines dinner for her friends, bake cookies, everything. if she had a partner, it would be really similar. she likes to spoil people, gift giving and acts of service are her ways of showing love - buuuut she does want to be spoiled in return, so physical affection and quality time is what she wants to receive. she wants to be treated like a princess, be picked up, have her doors opened for her, told she looks beautiful, etc.

jack is even less likely to do something than toby. before the sacrifice, he'd grab a cheap bag of individually wrapped chocolates and give them to people he knew around campus. i could see him buying the same chocolates and leaving it in his cabin. telling whoever visits him to take some. nina would leave him some flowers too(say its also from toby) and he'd be really grateful, cuz she'd be very sure to get him whatever he thinks smells the nice. that way he can still appreciate it. if he had a partner, YOU KNOW HE'S COOKING THE MOST BEAUTIFUL DINNER AT HOME. he's cleaning up, very awkwardly trying to dress nice. black button up, slacks, slick his hair back(or he'd just do whatever his partner says looks best, not too concerned with his own preference). he'd feel sooo fucking embarrassed and very nervous but he just wants to make it special. he'd write a long love letter, too

jeff isnt doing shit for anyone. he'll go steal some chocolate and mind his own business. if he had a partner, one that he ACTUALLY loved and wanted to keep around. maybe he'd pick up some flowers and chocolate, mainly cuz he knows thats the bare minimum sort of gift. he'd let them demand that day from him, which takes a LOT for him to let anyone feel entitled to HIS time. if he knows they have higher expectations (dinner, a letter, etc) he'd probably bitch and moan and be like "ugh you already know im into you why do i gotta do this shit" but if theyre serious, he'd probably do it. half assed though...

kates also not doing anything unprompted. she wouldnt even know the day is coming around. her only memories of valentines day would be passing out some candy and cards around class in elementary school, but once she was in the forest, nobody gave HER shit. she might pick some flowers and wrap it in some paper for people , but ONLY if she KNOWS they're getting something for her. like, she'd pick nina some flowers cuz she knows ninas doing something regardless, but she wouldnt get toby anything cuz she wouldnt have expected it from him. then shed feel bad. if she had a partner, again it'd be similar. she KNOWS she needs to put in the effort, but she doesnt exactly have the resources... the farm does pay her some cash since she works with the animals, but she mostly just gives it straight to toby so he can buy stuff for the cabin. but she'd keep it this time around, and quietly ask toby if he could come with her to get some stuff for them. some sweets, a necklace, scribble out a little letter. smth sweet.

janes married. and she goes all out of her wife. buys her like a 3dozen bouquet of red roses, sets reservations at nice restaurants, makes mary breakfast the morning of. all of that. i dont even know how to go into detail on this because thats just how it is for her, theres not some turmoil for her to work through. she'd also start getting sally some stuff. plushies holding hearts, balloons, sweet things like that. if she had a partner...WELL SHE ALREADY DOES!!!!

if liu knows nina is going to gift him something expensive, he's doing the same. he's going to grab her flowers and maybe some shoes or something he knows she's had her eye on. he wouldn't be really subtle about it, just text her "whats on your wishlist right now" LOLLL... he just appreciates nina's presence (after they get over the jeff situation) and likes having a little sister to spoil. he'd probably send jane a bouquet of flowers with a thank you note, since jane did a lot for him. if he had a partner, it would also be very stereotypical. date plans, picking them up, flowers, etc. he'd LOOOOVE to make one of those big baskets filled to the brim with random shit. would wanna come home and draw a nice bubble bath and have some wine. stuff like that in general...

ben, lulu, ann, and dina wouldnt do anything and wouldnt get a partner. lazari would draw some pictures for her friends! sally will draw something for jane and mary

#creeped #not everyone gets equal love cuz...idk #uhh #ticci toby #clockwork #nina the killer #eyeless jack #jeff the killer #jane the killer #homicidal liu #creepypasta headcanons #creepypasta fandom #i like when u guys call me sucker im like :D HAYYY

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kckt88 · 2 months

Text

Take My Breath Away What If! NSFW Alphabet ft. Aemond & Aegon with Vaeryna.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the House of The Dragon or Fire & Blood characters nor do I claim to own them. I do not own any of the images used.

Comments, likes, and reblogs are very much appreciated.

A = Aftercare (what Aemond & Aegon are like after sex with Vaeryna)

Aemond: After he’s finished basking in the afterglow of sex, Aemond will fetch a cloth and clean Vaeryna up whilst nuzzling her neck and pressing gentle kisses to her skin.

Aegon: Asks if she’s ok and then wants to cuddle.

B = Body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also Vaeryna’s)

Aemond: His favourite body part of his own is his hair, he just loves it when Vaeryna pulls on it when they have sex or how she runs her fingers through it whilst he’s bathing after a hard training session. His favourite body part on Vaeryna is her breasts, he loves licking/sucking her rosy nipples, especially when she’s producing milk to feed one of their babes.

Aegon: His favourite body part is his hands; he just loves to run his fingers along Vaeryna’s soft pale skin and listen to her giggles as he tickles her. His favourite part of Vaeryna is her lips, they are plump and look fantastic wrapped around his cock.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Aemond: Loves to cum inside his wife. Although he prefers to spill his seed inside her cunny, he also enjoys spilling inside her mouth on occasion and watching her swallow.

Aegon: Likes to cum anywhere, he’s not fussy.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Aemond: The whole threesome thing they have going on – His mother would probably have a heart attack if she knew.

Aegon: Maybe the threesome thing, but he’s pretty sure that his mother and the council would literally implode if they knew Vaeryna had sucked his cock whilst he sat on the Iron Throne.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Aemond: Only bedded 3-no 4 people, (he doesn’t like to reminisce about his past involvement with the whore on the Streets of Silk or Alys) but the years he’s been with Vaeryna have served him well and he knows his wife’s soft luscious body and how to make her scream his name.

Aegon: Had more sex than hot dinners, man has a wealth of knowledge that he likes to put to good use.

F = Favourite position (this goes without saying)

Aemond: Loves being on top, there’s just something about the intimacy of being able to look into Vaeryna’s eyes or how he can kiss her as he thrusts his cock inside her, he also loves it when she wraps her legs around his waist and holds his body close as she tells him she loves him.

Aegon: Loves Vaeryna being on top, his fingers digging into her waist as she rides him like an unclaimed dragon. But then he does thoroughly enjoy being bent over by his brother.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Aemond: Can be very serious during sex, mutual pleasure is very important.

Aegon: Depends on the day.

H = Hair (how well-groomed are they?)

Aemond: Well-groomed and clean.

Aegon: Doesn’t actually have a lot of hair down there as that’s where some of his burn scars are from the Battle above Rooks Rest.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Aemond: Will often tell Vaeryna how much he loves her and perfect she is, loves to tell her when they have sex. His wife knowing how much he wants her is important.

Although he does enjoy it when Vaeryna runs her fingers through the sparse hairs on his chest as they cuddle afterwards or the way she noses the trail of hair that leads from his bellybutton down to his cock.

Aegon: Does asking Vaeryna if she’s ready for his cock before he sticks it inside her count? He’s not sure about the whole romance thing, its not something he’s ever been used too.

J = Jack off (masturbation)

Aemond: Has regular sex so he doesn’t need to touch himself that often, but there have been times when Vaeryna was heavy with his child and they couldn’t have sex so he indulged in the act of self-pleasure, seeing her all round, and swollen with his seed does things to him.

Aegon: Everyday, can’t help it. He loves to touch himself as he thinks of Vaeryna and Aemond.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Aemond: Lactation Kink, Breeding Kink, Spit Kink, Daddy Kink, Slight Dom, Hair pulling.

Aegon: Loves a bit of over stimulation, hair pulling, and he likes to be slapped.

L = Location (favourite places to do the deed)

Aemond: Their chambers (The bed, the desk, the floor in front of the fireplace and in the bath) but he is partial to a bit of outside fucking.

Aegon: Anywhere really, it doesn’t matter.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Aemond: Pretty much anything when it comes to Vaeryna, she knows exactly how to get his cock hard.

Aegon: Vaeryna has a certain smile she reserves just for him, and he knows exactly what it means.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Aemond: Nothing to do with piss and NO he will not let Aegon stick his cock inside him-he’s a top.

Aegon: Anything goes-He’s not shy.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Aemond: He could spend all day, every day devouring Vaeryna’s delicious cunny, he loves bringing her to peak on his tongue. As for receiving, Vaeryna and Aegon have different techniques, but he loves it either way.

Aegon: Loves devouring the cunny, especially Vaeryna she’s gets so deliciously wet, its glorious. But he does love it when she returns the favour, the way her teeth gently graze against his length drives him crazy.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Aemond: Depends on how he feels, he loves slow and a gentle, making sure to take his time, but he also loves fast and rough.

Aegon: Doesn’t matter, he loves it all.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Aemond: YES!! Especially that time they had a quickie in the council chambers.

Aegon: Of course, can’t complain. The risk is half the reward.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Aemond: In a threesome with his wife and brother, pretty self-explanatory.

Aegon: Up for anything freaky, doesn’t discriminate.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Aemond: Very fast recovery time (it’s actually scary how quick he can be ready again) loves going multiple rounds.

Aegon: Needs a cup of wine and a quick rest, then he’s good to go.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Aemond: Never really thought about it.

Aegon: Is not ashamed to admit that he does have a number of wooden cocks.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Aemond: Loves to tease to the point of frustration, enjoys listening to Vaeryna begging for his cock.

Aegon: Doesn’t have much patience for that kind of thing.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Aemond: Can be loud/vocal.

Aegon: Moans and whimpers.

W = Wild card (a random head canon for the character)

Aemond: Would love to fuck Vaeryna on dragon back-he can’t believe they haven’t done it yet.

Aegon: Loves Vaeryna more than he admits, her reaction to his burn scars meant everything to him. He considers himself ugly, but she makes him feel beautiful.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Aemond: Very impressive. Length and girth. Man has been blessed.

Aegon: More girth than length, his groin is heavily scarred so doesn’t like to dwell too much on that area.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Aemond: High- He can’t get enough of his wife.

Aegon: High – Would live in bed if he could. Spends most of his time day dreaming about Vaeryna and Aemond.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Aemond: Depends if he wants another round, but he loves cuddling up to Vaeryna and holding her naked body against his as he drifts off.

Aegon: Instantly out cold, the release he feels just completely relaxes him.

#house of the dragon #aemond targaryen #hotd aemond #aemond fanfiction #hotd fanfic #aemond fic #aemond x oc #aemond x original female character #hotd fic #aegon x oc #aegon ii targaryen #hotd aegon #aegon ii #hotd smut #hotd #aemond one eye #aemond smut #prince aemond targaryen #prince aemond

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butchsophiewalten · 3 months

Note

for character bingo (if not done already) rosemary please!!

I really love these two.... I should draw them more, I always thoroughly enjoy it.

WOW THIS GOT REALLY EXTREMELY LONG. ITS UNDER THE CUT OK:

I'll start with Jack. I wax poetic about Jack a lot. He's a character that I find incredibly interesting, even if we don't really know particularly much about him yet. A lot of the things that I really like about him are like... interpretive? Or things that I've assumed. Hence the "not technically canon." I think a lot about "Jack Walten" as a like, a concept, within the universe of The Walten Files. Like, he was a man, who lived and had a place and a purpose within his community, but in the wake of his disappearance he's become sort of abstracted. I'm struggling to articulate this. I think of Jack as a character who has lost the ability to contextualize his own existence, and has instead become sort of an icon of himself.

I think to the community of Brighton he is a tragedy. He's a scary story. He's the memory of a man who was so well-known and so well-liked and then he up and disappeared one day and left countless rumors in his wake. And for Felix, I think he's always struggled to think of Jack as a person, and has always considered him more of a representation of his own inadequacy, and then a representation of his guilt. Felix has always kinda used Jack as a way to gauge himself. Like, Jack has always been a point of comparison. But then, Felix's relationship with Jack, to me, has also been a means for Felix to kinda improve his own self-image. I think a lot about Felix's very pleased sort of reaction to Jack's "You're a life saver, Felix." during the phone call in Bunnyfarm. I think Felix really desperately craves that sort of validation from Jack, because it makes him feel like less of a fuckup. Jack is a Good Person who has a Good Life and has his shit worked out, so if he's telling Felix he did good, he must be doing something right. That sort of dynamic where, for Felix, it's less about doing a favor for his friend, and more about chasing that dopamine hit that the validation will give him. Jack is a means to an end for him, where Felix wouldn't really care if it was Jack, or any other man who has a perceived position of success and privilege. (I have a lot more to say about this specifically, but this is turning into a Felix Analysis on my Jackmary Post, so I'm going to save it for the Felix bingo)

I got very distracted. I was trying to say that I think Jack is a person who, like, only really exists in the way the he is remembered, in the eyes of the people who remember him. Which is why Felix trying to scrub away his history with BSI is such a big deal, and why I also think it's really narratively and thematically interesting that Sophie *really struggles* to remember him. Like, she remembers him the least of anyone, almost. I think that's a really weighty sort of thing.

I don't want to talk for too long about this, because I've complained about it so many times already, but the sort of fandom perception of Jack Walten really irks me. And there's a lot of facets to his mischaracterization, I think. I could complain about the 'where the fuck are my children' TikTok audio for the millionth time, but I won't even bother. But I'm excited to see more of Jack. And I'm excited to learn more about him and to get a better idea of the sort of character he is and isn't, because I'm sure even my characterization of him is deeply flawed. Because we know so little.

ROSEMARY TIME: I love Rosemary Walten. This is another character where I think the Fandom Perception of her is so flaccid and boring. She's just Mother. She's just Woman. like so much of the time. And in fairness we don't really know very much about her, but I'm, again. very excited to learn. I like that she seems very headstrong, and I like how Martin characterizes her as being very ferociously protective of her family. I really want to know more about her relationship with Sophie during that month (and a bit) when everyone but the two of them had disappeared.

Really everything we've seen so far relating to her relationship with Sophie has been very striking to me. I'm sure this is to no-one's surprise. The "Am I still beautiful to you, Sophie?" Is still, to me, like the ultimate crescendo of the series. It's so stark. It's so fantastic. I think it's really easy to get caught up in a whirlwind of thinking about just how difficult and horrifying this character's life has been. And I'm exciting to see how this upcoming batch of episodes will continue to humanize her, and put that much more emphasis on the tragedy and horror of her death. And of her possessing a big animatronic sheep. I think a lot about Sophie hearing the a woman's dying screams through the speakers of that arcade cabinet, and recognizing it as the voice of her mother. I think that's really terrible and fantastic.

I wish I could talk more about her, like, independently, as a person, but we still know so little. So much of what I feel is assumptions. I love Rose though, I'm excited for more Rose. I'm excited for more everyone.

#i keep forgetting these drawings are supposed to be super low effort. i spent way too long getting their faces to look nice #and then i remembered what i was doing and put no effort into the rest of the drawing. which is ok #by the wau when im done with these bingos (i wanna get as many done as i can before 4) im going to condense all the art into 1 big post #jack #rosemary

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fernsnailz · 2 months

Text

February 2024 Review Roundup

well i sure did watch some stuff and read one book this month

the things i finished this month reminded me that for every incredible piece of art i find myself enjoying, i end up watching some Hot Garbage immediately after to balance things out again. idk why i do this.

i have quite a bit to say about both the things i enjoyed and the things that brought me physical pain this month, so there is um. a lot under the cut. any previous desire for brevity i had in january has been completely thrown out the window as i use these roundups as an outlet to gush about things i like and complain about things i didn't. fair warning, if you open the readmore you will be scrolling for a while. enjoy i guess

House of Leaves

does any other book out there have the balls to write a completely fake interview with stephen king

House of Leaves is a novel you gotta throw around a little bit. It feels really weird that my copy is still in the pristine state I bought it in - It seems like it should have water damage and smell like mildew with its pages falling out and spine cracked into pieces. Getting the full story from this book requires flipping back and forth, turning it around, searching for answers. All things considered it’s not that difficult of a read, but its format still allows you to feel like you’re discovering every hidden piece for yourself, and I really liked that interactivity. I was engaged pretty much the whole way through.

I don’t really think I’ll be able to revisit this book anytime soon though. It’s difficult for me to format what else I’d like to say about it because to be honest, it caught me off guard and disturbed me on a fairly personal level. There’s a relief I feel when I remember that I don’t actually know what was going on with the house - maybe that was intentional on the book’s behalf, maybe I just didn’t look hard enough for answers. I don’t know. But the implication that something divine was down there was enough of an answer for me. The book's good. read it if you want a spooooooky time or if you never want to look at a hallway the same way again

Doctor Who (Series 1-4) (rewatch)

ok so this is a fuckload of doctor who to cover so i’m gonna give some thoughts on a few of the characters and my favorite + least favorite episodes

9th doctor: My favorite butch lesbian. Christopher Eccleston truly embodies the concept of The Doctor so, so well: otherworldly guy who knows too much, genuinely cares about life across the universe, and also has a bit of deep, unresolved rage. His moments of joy and careless fun stick with me the most, he absolutely radiates with life and brings so much to this character.

Rose: I first watched Doctor Who when I was in middle school, and I didn’t like Rose that much back then. And guys. I have bad news. I'm still not really much of a Rose fan

I definitely understood her more this watch through - that desire for adventure and some sort of control over her life, emotions so strong that she’s willing to throw near everything away. That’s just what being 19 is like sometimes. I think Rose is a very compelling character who just happens to frustrate me a bit. And that’s kinda the point, her co-dependent relationship with the Doctor is doomed to fail and it's meant to hurt. Ultimately, I think when I first watched the show I was too young to understand Rose, and now I’m just too old to relate to her.

Captain Jack: Jack is my favorite character. I fucking love this guy. Dude has the worst luck in the whole universe and still cannot be stopped. Legendary. Every episode with him is a goddamn delight because he has so much chemistry with every single cast member. No notes 10/10 i love my problematic bisexual king

10th doctor: About four episodes into David Tennant’s run I realized that he dresses like a Hazbin Hotel character and it made me very sad. Still, there’s a reason this guy inspired every middle schooler to buy a pair of converse in 2008. He has style, he has depth, he’s got the sauce. It’s genuinely terrifying to see his anger, I like that a lot of 10’s run is about his denial of godhood and power over life in the universe, something that the rest of the time lords desired. idk i like my sad pathetic little weasel but he's also a huge fucking asshole sometimes which sucks. especially when it's directed at Martha.

Martha: Martha I am so sorry for what this show put you through. Martha was my favorite companion when I first watched the show, and I still have a huge soft spot for her. Her ability to hold her own and navigate foreign worlds using her own intelligence absolutely rules, and her drive forward is unbreakable. But the show seems to put her down at every possible opportunity, most notably with how 10 treats her. Her struggles and wants are constantly ignored, and she's often treated as a rebound from Rose. And I like that she eventually chooses to end it by not traveling with 10 anymore, but it hurts because it feels like she was never given the same chance or care that Rose and Donna were. This era of Doctor Who really doesn’t treat its black companions well because Mickey goes through something similar - both Martha and Mickey are characters designed to be ignored or left behind, and it sucks.

Donna: Donna Noble is one of the greatest fictional characters to ever exist. Despite seemingly living a fairly average life and working a fairly average job, Donna reflects the idea that no one is truly "average" and every single person is brimming with personality, life, and love. I love that her relationship with 10 is purely platonic, personally their friendship feels like it has a lot more depth than either of the romance-oriented relationships 10 had with Rose and Martha. 10 and Donna bounce off of each other so well and it's delightful, Donna brings so much humor and life to every world she's taken to and it's incredible. I wish her and Captain Jack could have interacted more.

My favorite episode: The Runaway Bride is hard to not choose as my favorite. I have a blast every time I watch this episode and it’s such a good introduction for Donna. Also the Tardis car chase kills me, I love when it cuts to the kids in the back of another car clapping and cheering. I was also surprised by the episode Midnight - it’s dreadful to watch and I kinda loved it. So much spirals out of control when shit hits the fan, even though no one has any idea what they’re trying to fight against. Really interesting exploration as to how fear can drive people apart.

My least favorite episode: It’s Love & Monsters. I wish I liked this episode - stories that follow regular ass people living in this world are often some of the best episodes in the series (Weeping Angels and all that). And this episode definitely has some of that. It’s honestly really touching to see this group of nerds get together and enjoy life in the first part of the episode. I think the antagonist of “guy who absorbs people” ends up dragging down any charm this story had because he just. eats all of the interesting characters. But despite me disliking this episode, I honestly have a deep respect for it - it’s fucking crazy. It ends with the main guy telling us about his sex life with his girlfriend who is now stuck in a piece of concrete. Where else are you going to get a story like this. It fucking sucks and that’s hilarious

oh also the production design: GODDDDDD I FUCKING LOVE THE PRODUCTION DESIGN AND SETS ON THIS SHOW. I love how dirty and rundown a lot of the spaceship sets look with wires and lights scattered everywhere. And a number of alien designs also go CRAZY with the prosthetics - I keep thinking about the Hath from The Doctor’s Daughter and how every head prosthetic had liquid inside it that could bubble. Absolutely crazy. I also love the moments where you can clearly see they did not have that much time and just had to throw something together or pain a bald cap green. Jank is the nature of sci-fi production design and I dearly love and miss that Doctor Who jank.

Rebuild of Evangelion

Last year after finishing the original Evangelion series + End of Evangelion, I remember going through the Evangelion tumblr tag and being very confused by the number of slice of life/found family-esque fanworks of the cast. It left me puzzled and thinking “...did we even watch the same thing??”

APPARENTLY NOT

[spoiler warning here because these movies are very good and i give the best parts away. if you want to watch these movies then DO IT NOW!!!!!!!!]

I honestly never expected a world where these characters got a happy ending. I so, so badly wish I could see 3.0 and 3.0+1.0 in theaters - these movies are stunning. I know I say things “go crazy” a lot, but man. They go fucking CRAZY.

While I have a few issues with how the first two movies adapted the original show, I do think the changes they made better serve the story this rebuild is trying to tell. For example, my favorite episode in the original Eva series is episode 18, where Toji is chosen to pilot Unit 03. It’s absolutely terrifying because Shinji doesn’t know who 03’s pilot is, yet he’s forced to be inside Unit 01 as it tears 03 apart. His resolve not to kill anyone despite not even knowing who’s in danger is an aspect of that episode I love and speaks to Shinji's inherent humanity, and when he learns Toji was in there it hurts even more. The rebuild movies change Unit 03’s pilot to Auska, and Shinji knows she’s in there from the start. I think this choice works for the movies and is still an effective emotional beat, but personally I still prefer the version where Shinji had no idea who was in there. That lack of knowledge is infinitely more terrifying to me.

I really like what these movies did with some of the angel designs though. The sixth angel (the fuckin. blue diamond cube thing) works really well in 3D/CG animation. The way the thing warps and moves is otherly and terrifying - and it’s just a fucking cube. I’ve always really loved how the Eva series approaches angel designs and the divine - despite the alien-like designs, there’s often something extremely familiar about them. They’re often reminiscent of an animal, a machine, or a human. This is also how they approached the anti-universe in these movies, I loved how it takes the form of various locations from the series and turns them into a movie set. It’s deeply familiar, but ultimately just an illusion of familiarity like the angels and the divine.

Also I gotta say. I fucking love Mari. I think she’s hilarious. She first meets Shinji by accidentally parachuting into him and then immediately starts crawling on all fours to sniff him. This girl also introduces “Beast Mode” where the Eva pilots can go wild turn their mechs into a fucking. superpowered beast of some sort. And also she defeats a whole army by using the Eiffel Tower as a spear. She’s such an absurd character and I honestly kinda love it. The only thing I knew about these movies before watching them was this gif of her Backing That Shit Up and she truly lives up to the insane nature of this shot.

My favorite section of these movies is definitely the first part of 3.0+1.0 where the pilots are basically just living a domestic life in a small town - it’s truly beautiful. The growth that Rei’s copy goes through here is fantastic, I love stories about seemingly emotionless beings learning how to live. And right after she dies, we get the shot that absolutely broke me the first time I saw it:

This shit. The way you can just barely tell he’s been crying from the red around his eyes. They don't talk about it, they barely linger on it, but it's allowed just enough time to punch you in the gut. I don’t know why this shot got me as hard as it did but goddamn. jesus christ. i want to throw up

There’s some goofy shit in these movies. The infinite synch rate. Misato’s stupidass hat and sunglasses. Some goofy ass 3D animation that doesn’t age super well. The rainbow that shows up every time an angel dies. But these things really didn’t take me out of the core of these films, and there’s so much genuine emotion and beauty in this series that had me absolutely hooked - especially in the last two films. They go crazy. My favorite line is 100% “The only thing a son can do for his father is pat him on the shoulder… or kill him.” and man. ain’t that what Evangelion is all about. i love these movies

High School Musical 3

kinda slaps just a little bit

High School Musical 3 starts with a finale number. The last high school basketball game of Troy Bolton’s life - and it goes kinda hard. The classic pep band brass that’s essential to so many High School Musical numbers returns, and the constant theme of two feuding cheer teams in the background? Genius. This is truly art. I love listening to Now or Never without visuals because in the middle Troy just starts coughing and gagging seemingly out of nowhere

Unfortunately, starting the movie at such a high point means that the rest of the runtime doesn’t quite match up to it. The story lags and meanders quite a bit, but part of me kinda appreciates that - it’s their last semester of high school, which is always a time of confusion and turmoil. However, I do have a pitch for how they could have countered the constant falling action this movie seems to go through:

The Wildcats should have lost their last game at the beginning of the movie.

What if the game is instead the inciting incident that leads Troy and his besties through their tumultuous last semester? Troy is still torn between basketball and theater, but his identity would be even further challenged here - is winning and success all that matters for him, or is it the love of sport and performance that keeps him going? idk whatever this movie came out 16 years ago i can’t be out here writing AUs for it jgnfsgfnjdksg

Some miscellaneous thoughts about this movie that i don’t care about formatting into larger paragraphs:

Ryan and Sharpay’s number (I Want It All) slaps as usual. The part where Ryan shouts “MADISON SQUARE GARDEN!!!!!!!” makes me so happy every time i hear it

The production design and sets go absolutely fucking crazy. I still have no idea how they pulled off the spinning hallway in Scream.

One of the classic staples of HSM is Chad’s shirts. Most of them are fairly silly and like something you would expect to find in the walmart clearance section. However, there’s one shirt he has in this movie that confused the hell out of me. It’s this one:

What the FUCK does Greenster mean. Is it just a combination of Green and Monster?? Why??? What green monster are we talking about here????? Where the fuck did this shirt come from?????????

Avatar The Last Airbender (2024)

There’s really only one word I can think of to describe what this show is like: sauceless. No flavor. No depth. No character. No sauce. This show is honestly so fucking boring and seems to fundamentally misunderstand what the appeal of the original Avatar series is - not necessarily because things are changed or removed from the original, but because nothing of substance is added in return.

Most of the characters are mere echoes of their original counterparts when compared to their source material. Sokka is reduced to a guy who wants to fight good, Katara’s stubborn and confrontational nature is very rarely utilized, and Aang’s mischievous antics and love of fun is sorely missing. One of the major reasons for the dull interpretations seems to be the directing - While I have faith that most of these actors are trying their best (especially since a number of them are kids/young adults), the direction seems to be incredibly lackluster and takes away nearly every cast member’s stage presence or personality. There’s a number of reaction shots of the main trio that just look like this: 😐😐😐 as if they were just told to “look concerned” at the events unfolding before them. And these issues are apparent in the majority of the performances - for example, General Zhao talks like he’s in a board meeting up until the last episode, and it’s an incredibly flat performance. He talks somewhat monotone in the original series as well, but this live-action take on the character often meanders with his dialogue and lacks that sharp, terrifying quality that I think this character needs. Uncle Iroh also feels incredibly stiff in this adaptation, and it’s a goddamn crime that they took away the cunty little outfit and chains he was originally wearing when he gets captured by earthbenders. wait who said that

Credit where credit is due, there’s a few cast members that seem to be giving their best. It’s clear that Aang’s actor enjoys the role and does pretty well despite the lackluster direction and dialogue he’s given. On top of that, I think Zuko’s actor is honestly the best part of the show. His take on Zuko leans much more into teenage tendencies and sarcasm, which, although it can be silly, is a welcome take of the character in my opinion and pretty fun to watch. There’s this one line he has at the beginning of episode 2 where, in an incredibly whiny tone of voice, he goes “He RAN! The ultimate warrior! He’s a Coward :((((“ and the read is so. fucking funny

The case of bad direction isn’t limited to the performances, however. It’s also stunningly apparent in how everything is shot. Despite being in a widescreen format, most shots are incredibly centered - you could crop the entire runtime into a 4:3 frame and you wouldn’t be cutting out much of anything. I’ve seen some speculation that this was an intentional choice to make things more adaptable or readable for TikTok/phone video, but honestly I think that’s a dumb take. I think the issue stems from a lack of creativity and thoughtless composition. Keeping everything staged in the center can make shots feel disjointed, lacking much depth, or completely empty. It’s a boring way to shoot and indicates that the show lacks any unique vision at all.

Overall, this show doesn't really seem to understand what makes Avatar interesting in the first place. It's more interested in spectacle and action than the characters' relationships, emotions, and mistakes. I try not to compare it too much to the original since it's allowed to take liberties with its adaptation, but very few of its changes add much to the end result or give it a unique voice. It's just sauceless and boring.

Some YouTube videos i liked in February:

💥 My House.WAD - Inside Doom's Most Terrifying Mod (some supplemental House of Leaves material for ya) 💥 Martha Jones Deserved Better (this video explains how Doctor Who did Martha dirty better than i ever could) 💥 bringing JUSTICE to the worst garfield game 💥 Selling Kids for Clout: The Downfall of Family Channels

And that’s my roundup for February! Thank you for reading, I promise there are no more reviews left to scroll through below this goodbye. Nope, nothing else I watched this month. Bye!

…ok is everyone gone. phew, i’m glad no one noticed i pulled an hbomberguy and hid the largest part of this post under a false ending. Anyway holy shit i need to talk about hazbin hotel

Hazbin Hotel

well i didn’t like it

Hazbin Hotel is a weird, fascinating mess of a show. Every episode left me wondering what creative decisions (or lack thereof) led to the sequence of images I just watched. There’s been a lot of discussion of this show recently and I’m not interested in covering every critique I have, but there’s a few things that I'd like to talk about somewhat in-depth.

Hell is real and it's just Red Chicago

The setting of Hell is kinda boring in this show.

Let me try to put this into perspective. Aside from the hotel, here’s a list of the locations we see in Hell:

A boardroom

A video store

Vox’s evil lair (it has cyber sharks which is kinda cool)

Various streets

Another boardroom

A BDSM club

Carmilla’s house (it’s gray and has. balconies?)

A porn studio

A bar

Another bar

A town square (full of cannibals)

None of these locations really take on any sort of otherworldly form besides some vague demonic imagery scattered throughout (and the cannibals. i guess. whatever). In short, Hazbin Hotel’s setting resembles Chicago more than it does Hell.

I can see a world where that’s intentional. Perhaps making Hell resemble a modern city could be used as a thematic tool or point of relatability? But Hazbin doesn’t really do anything like that - since the characters rarely ever interact with their environments, these locations end up seeming like they lack creativity, like they’re just cardboard sets where characters go to swear. They all start to blend together after a while - every street feels the same, every boardroom fades into the background, and every bar feels like a google image search result for the word “club.” This world feels stunningly empty despite the busy designs and colors. Even though the backgrounds are painted and designed fairly well, nothing of substance is ever really added to them through the story.

However, a few musical numbers take effort to break away from these settings. This felt like a weight off of my shoulders whenever it happened, it was nice to see some interesting setpieces and backgrounds that weren’t red. I liked the bombastic and over-the-top broadway lights in Loser and the glowing alternate world in Charlie and Lucifer’s song. But these moments are few and crowded by the dull locations in Hell - or worse, the Hotel itself.

Despite being the namesake of the show, the actual Hazbin Hotel is… lifeless. Which, yeah, it’s a hotel where dead people go in the afterlife, but it’s missing any sort of personality or history besides “it’s old and falling apart.” I expected the hotel to be full of secrets - like maybe some hidden passages or rooms, or mysterious cabinets full of rotted meats, or old valuables hidden under the rugs by the previous owners. Something for the cast to explore and discover, and as they get closer to each other they also start to understand the hotel more. Alastor seems very intent on keeping the physical hotel standing for some reason, but I never really understood why. There’s nothing there. And that nothingness is fully realized when at the end of the show, they just rebuild the entire hotel to be grand and beautiful - an emotional beat that didn’t hit me at all because I never felt like I knew the hotel in the first place. Despite rebuilding it from the ground up, it will feel just as empty.

3 SHOTS THAT DRIVE ME CRAZY

I was truly baffled at how some of these scenes are timed and put together. Multiple sequences left me feeling nauseous and dazed - the camera moves like it’s being swung on the end of a rope, and there’s so many misplaced or meaningless cuts scattered through these episodes.

There’s a sequence of three shots in the first episode that I want to dissect. I will fully admit that I'm breaching nitpicking territory here, but the shot composition issues in this show are pretty rampant and my analysis here is just a hyper-specific look at a single part of that larger problem. Hopefully you can also use it as a quick storyboarding lesson too idk

First, we see Adam teasing Charlie.

Then, it cuts straight to this shot:

A few things here.

Shot 2 is just closer on the characters, which is not a great idea to cut to after the previous waist-up shot. On top of being a jarring jump cut, there is no purpose for this new shot. All the information we see here (Adam laughs, Charlie fake laughs) could have just been conveyed in the previous shot.

Despite the characters being in the same position as the last shot, the background changes. This straight up just feels like an error. I think the idea is supposed to be that the camera is at a different angle, but the position of the characters does not convey that. It looks like reality changes behind them.

And if that’s not enough, this is the shot we get immediately after those two:

In this shot, the residents of the hotel sit on the couch as Vaggie walks into the shot, framing them between her legs. But there’s something… off.

Vaggie either looks like she’s floating or she’s three stories tall. Quick storyboard lesson as to why:

The main problem with this shot is that the perspective of the background doesn’t match up with where Vaggie is placed. The couch is framed as if the camera were above it, but Vaggie is framed like the camera is floor-level below her. I’ve traced the shot and added a perspective grid to hopefully better illustrate this:

Do you see what I mean? If the camera WAS actually on the floor like Vaggie’s position in the shot suggests, the composition would look more like this:

Notice how much closer the floor grid is to the bottom of the frame and how you can see the underside of the couch.

And to be fair, this is probably what the original storyboard for this shot looked like! Personally I think something went wrong in the compositing stage - this might be a couch background from another shot that was reused here to save time, or whoever approved this shot just let the error slide since the shot is so short (i've been there. sometimes you let the jank slide). Most animated shows will have some poorly framed shots and continuity errors because mistakes are bound to happen, but two egregious ones right next to each other like this is. pretty bad. It's so noticeable from a directing perspective.

Here’s the thing: these three shots happen in the span of like 10 seconds. Most viewers probably wouldn’t notice these issues, and that's fine. But even though these errors are quick, they stack upon each other so fast that even if you can’t pinpoint exactly what’s wrong, something still feels wrong. There’s so many other moments where the show breaks extremely basic shot composition, continuity, and staging rules - for example, the second musical number of the show breaks the 180 rule like four times for no good reason. The whole show feels like a dizzy, nauseating mess because the shots rarely feel like they form anything cohesive.

MY ROOMMATE TOLD ME TO GO TO BED SO HERE ARE SOME FINAL THOUGHTS

Here’s a rundown on some other thoughts that I don’t care to format into larger sections:

The show seems to lack much to say about sin and redemption other than “redemption good.” like sure, but what are they being redeemed from? Is heaven truly the place they deserve to go after being redeemed, even though it’s shown to be unjust? Are there sins that are too great to be redeemed from, or others that shouldn't be considered sins at all? I asked myself a number of questions like this, but never got many answers from Hazbin.

This show has a bad relationship with kink and sex. Both are mostly used as a punchline or a form of control. I didn’t like it. Perhaps the reason Hazbin never really comments on the nature of sin is because it needs you to consider sex and kink sinful or otherly for these jokes to hit.

Some of the animation is crazy good. I will praise any animator that even attempts to make these character designs move. A number of extremely talented people worked on this show, a few of the musical sequences in particular have some incredible movement.

Alastor is a very boring character. It’s wild that most of the side characters in this show only exist to talk about how much they like or hate Alastor, he mostly just stands to the side of some shots or kills random nameless goons. I expected him to have a much larger role in the story, but he just gets his ass kicked in the final episode and then crawls back to the hotel.

Episode 4 is the most cohesive, and i think Angel is the best character in the show. Unfortunately, the fact that Hazbin takes so much effort to show Angel’s misery left me… concerned? None of the other characters get treated as poorly as Angel by the narrative. There’s a few smaller explorations of trauma, but nothing remotely compares to what Angel is put through on-screen. This isn’t to say that I think the whole cast needs to be extremely traumatized and constantly miserable, but rather that I find it concerning that the only character subjected to incredibly graphic abuse and torture (that we see or hear about) is the gay sex worker. Which sucks, because I think the concept of hypersexuality resulted from sexual abuse is an important topic worthy of discussing in adult media. I just think they tried to execute this theme without much critical thought beforehand.

I think the voice cast does a fantastic job for the most part. Keith David is way too good for Husk.

I really liked the one shot where Charlie opens her phone and we see that she has a contact for every individual egg minion.

I was very brave and got through this whole review without talking about my new least favorite character of all time, Vox. here’s what I think of him:

The overall vision and end result of Hazbin Hotel is just mediocre. While I don’t know what led to the messy state this show ended up in, my guess is that it was probably the result of inadequate direction, sloppy writing, and lacking creative support from the studios involved. Because of this, please understand that I have no desire or intention to put down any individual artists that worked on this show - I hope it's clear that most of my criticisms are directed at the larger vision these artists were given to execute and/or the lack of creative support they received while working on this show.

I also don’t really have much desire to participate in any further Hazbin discussion or discourse because it has wasted enough of my time already and I want to be free of this curse. please spare my inbox from hazbin hotel discourse. please. i'm begging.

You want to know what the most fucked up thing about this is though? Despite everything I said about Hazbin, Avatar the Last Airbender 2024 is still the worst show I watched this month. I would take Hazbin over Avatar 2024 literally any day.

well if you got this far. thanks for reading. also sorry you read all that. whelp alright back into my hole i go bye bye

#to get to my hazbin hotel opinions you must first read my pitch on how i would have written high school musical 3 #jesus christ. either i gotta watch less things or learn to shut the hell up next month this is a longass post #review roundup #long post

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hijackalx · 6 months

Text

ASTARION NSFW ALPHABET

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

hes such a dick if ur a one night stand LMAO understandably tho. understandably..... but yeah if hes not really feeling u he just kind of dips out after coming up with some wack ass rehearsed excuse to protect ur feelings. totally different story if he loves u though. i feel like he gets sooo lovey-dovey post nut OMG like soo much praise and so many kisses. post nut clarity with his S/O consists of him enjoying the many wonders of the world 😭😭 that shit will have him watching the sunset

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

i think he likes his hands. i mean its one of the things he can see so like. but they are really nice. long and nimble fingers and smooth palms. his hands look like poetry lowkey. anyway if ur AFAB he loves titties. any titty. loves to mark them up and watch them bounce while u ride him. if ur AMAB its ur shoulder/collarbone area especially if its dainty and delicate looking but regardless he wants to bite around there. youll see him looking at them a lot

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

he wants to come on ur face or inside u. his two go-tos. if hes about to nut he'll ask u really quick which u want and u have like 3 seconds to answer LMAO. takes a while to get to that point tho so u have some time to think about it beforehand 😭😭

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

he got hard asf the first time u let him drink from u LMAOO he walked away and jerked off IMMEDIATELY

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

hundreds of years of experience is enough for me yeah

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

oooooooooooo gurl. ugh hold on theres so many it could be. ok so theres two. 1. he likes to sit u in his lap (the back of ur head on his shoulder or maybe even sitting sideways with ur legs off the side ??? idk however yall want) and finger/jerk u off. it makes him feel sooo in control 🤤 and 2. he lovesss eye contact so any positions where he can stare into ur soul 👁️👁️ yall why am i only seeing missionary rn...... or planking i guess lol

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

i think hes pretty serious. he might even get pissed off if u start acting too goofy lol like hes playful but not going to start cracking jokes 😹😹

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

this pains me to say...... but i dont think elves get body hair if any (like canonically)....... but i think its weird to be completely bald so im going to say hes got a little bit of pubic hair, armpit hair, and of course leg/arm hair. its just not very long or thick. he basically never has to trim or anything

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

my boy is a romantic at heart yall. will kiss u a lot and hold u very close. i think its rlly important for him to have some sort of emotional connection thru sex.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

honestly dont feel like he ever does normally LMAO when u reject him or push him away during the first romance scene and he says he'll go beat off i think hes just saying that to make u feel bad 😹😭 when u let him drink from u it was probably the first time he jerked off in a longggg time. i can see him thinking hes above doing something like that lol so its an ego thing

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

ok did u guys see the little church looking building at the first campsite in act 3??? i think if yall were to smash there he'd never forget it. like something about that turns him on so much. probably bent u over the altar. even after u guys are long gone he still thinks abt it.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

suck on his fingers omg. but also really likes to use sex to put u in ur place so if u guys argue or just dont get along at some point he will use that as a build up to sex. so he will purposely push ur buttons A LOT. cuz its like, how dare u raise ur voice at him ?? 😤

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

if u dont go along with what he wants to do he kind of gets pissy after a while. he only ever really wants to be in control and thats it. also wont do anything extreme or ridiculous either 😭😭 anything that makes him feel humiliated is a big no

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

for AFAB like ive said before he is the self-proclaimed coochie eating champion of faerun. sooooo good at it its not funny. will also kiss it and leave more kisses/bites on ur thighs. makes u feel like ur coochie is the most divine coochie in the world LMAO omg also will want to eat u out every time ur on ur period......... i think thats like one thing he will absolutely beg for OOP

if ur AMAB its basically the same just with a dick lol

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

he can do both. probably likes to be a little rougher than most people though

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

yeah if hes in the mood i can see him scouting the area for a place to smash LMAO which probably happens pretty often. doesnt mind giving up the romantic aspect as long as yall still fuck for real every once in a while.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

i think he would need to be convinced. willing to hear u out at least

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

TOO LONG. HE LASTS WAY TOO LONG. i mean after u been suckin and fuckin for that many years how do u not take forever to nut 😭😭 u will get urs tho dont worry. also perfect situation for u to have multiple orgasms so dont get discouraged besties 🤘🏻

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

allllll the timeeeee. he wants u to need him more than anything else before he fucks u. u need to need this man like u need oxygen. like a fish needs water. like a plant needs the sun. like a

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

grunts and groans but when he gets closer to finishing he'll start moaning. he doesnt make an effort to stay quiet but also wont do anything embarrassing 😹

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

emmmmm i wanna say he can go a pretty long time without sex. but if he has a partner he is sexually attracted to his libido can be pretty high. but lets remember he is getting into his erectile dysfunction years ☝🏻 JOKINGGGG LMAO

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

well he meditates technically. but he gets into that lil meditation pose fast as fuck boy 🧘 do not interrupt him either he'll be grumpy 😭

#astarion #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #baldurs gate #x reader #headcanons #astarion bg3 #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #my headcanons #astarion ancunin

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