Tumgik
#i’m being overdramatic also I have so much happening this week and two weeks from now
nimikyu · 7 months
Text
if I have to endure one more boring week I think I’m going to set myself on fire for stimuli
4 notes · View notes
satorusugurugurl · 3 months
Note
If this request makes you uncomfortable or isn’t something you want to write, I apologize and please ignore my request!
Heyy! I was wondering if I could request a satoru x reader x Suguru smut? With like, some bdsm mixed in yk. Tying reader up, satoru is a tease, and likes to make her squirm and ask questions he know she can’t answer because Suguru is fucking her throat. But Suguru is mean. Mean and tougher than satoru. He tells satoru to stop being so gentle with you, that not only do you deserve rough treatment but you like it. And satoru listens to him, of course. I just want them to run through me like a train😞
Also same mean geto anon (again lol) I’m gonna just sign off w an emoji now :3 -🍭
Hi Anon!
This isn't my cup of tea, it's my FUCKING jam!!
Summary: Gojo and Geto had been on a two-week-long mission, which hadn't gone as smoothly as Suguru wanted. He was pent-up and frustrated. So, of course, Gojo called you to warn you it might not be a good idea to come over. You, of course, did not heed his warning. The second you get home, you realize that you were screwed.
Word Count: 3,706
Warnings: BDSM, rough sex, oral sex, so much sex, degradation, teasing, the smuttiest of smut
A/N: Good God, Satoru x Reader x Suguru is my weakness!! I put my whole heart into this. Geto Suguru, teacher AU, is my kryptonite!
Part Two
Tumblr media
She Likes it Like That
“Y/N babe,” Gojo said in a hushed whisper, “you probably shouldn't come home tonight.”
You cocked an eyebrow, looking away from the first year's training. “I'm sorry, did you just tell me not to come home. . .to our apartment?” The world ‘our’ came out like acid.
Gojo sighed overdramatically. “Don't say it like that. I'm trying to save you! Suguru is in such a bad mood.” You listened to him walking around. “I sighed out loud when I noticed the last of my mochi was gone. Fuck you for that, by the way, and do you know what he said to me?” You pinched at the bridge of your nose, waiting for the rant to continue. “He told me to shut the fuck up! For sighing!”
“What did you do to piss him off? Oh, and just an FYI, I bought you more mochi, asshole.”
“Oh—” silence, “thank you-I’m sorry, please don't return it.”
“Satoru! Forget about the mochi. What happened to Sugu?”
The mission your partners were sent on did not go as planned. Their hotel had flooded; it was not like they had time to consider sleeping. The higher-ups sent them to an abandoned mountainside village full of cursed spirits. Poor Suguru had to swallow dozens for nearly two weeks. Gojo had enough; he couldn't stand the pained expression on his face as he gagged the last spirit down. So he decided to Hollow-Purpled the entire village.
The second they got back, the higher-ups scolded the hell out of them. Chastising them, complaining that they didn't do a good enough job. After all their hard work, the time they spent away from home, from you. Those bastards dared to complain about their hard work. It sent Suguru into a terrible mood, one that was bound to end with either a fight or someone getting fucked into the mattress.
One thing about Suguru was that when he was pissy, things felt out of his control. He needed to take control back. Which meant he wanted to have sex. He would be rough, really rough, tying either you or Satoru up, not letting you go until he had calmed down. Or if one of you was fucked too stupid to continue, his eyes focused on the other that wasn't tied up.
“So please, just stay with Ieiri tonight. I'm going to lock myself in my room. Last time he was this pissed off, the both of us were so sore we couldn't move.”
“Ugh, fuckin’ whatever.” This whole situation wasn't fair. You hated how your boyfriends were mistreated.
“Yeah, just stay the—oh, hi Suguru.” There was a shuffling in the background. “No, I wasn't talking shit.” Satoru nervously laughed. “Look, Sugu—no, put down the rope—”
“Toru?” Panic for your boyfriend sank into your stomach.
“Hey! Wait a second—Sugu—”
Before any other indication of what was happening came through the receiver, the other line cut off. So you quickly yelled to the students you had to leave and took off. By the time you made it, you were breathless from running and realized that in your panic, you left your keys at work.
You picked up the spare key hidden under the doormat. Just as you were about to unlock the door, it flew open. You slowly blinked, looking up at a very irritated Suguru. The man radiated gloom and tension. He was in his sweatpants, and his hair was tied in a messy bun, and, dear God, he looked pent up.
“Why the fuck are you using the spare key?”
“I-I uh—”
“Ooooh~ there she is~!” a hand gently rested against Suguru’s shoulder as Satoru peered down at you from behind your dark-haired boyfriend. “There's our girl!”
It only took a moment to see that Satoru mirrored Suguru’s frustration and anger. Oh fuck. The key fell from your hand as you took a step back. Suguru was demanding and rough when he was pent up. Satoru, on the other hand, was a tease. He liked pushing you, making you cry. Both of them being in a pissy mood simultaneously, this was a nightmare for you.
“Y-You, I thought you were in trouble!”
“Oh yeah, no.” Suguru’s soured face slowly twisted into a smirk as Satoru licked his lip. “But you~?” Suguru’s hand darted out, grabbing you by the front of your shirt, preventing you from moving further back. “You're royally fucked.” Before you even had a chance to respond, Suguru and Satoru grabbed you, yanking you inside.
“Awe~” Satoru hummed as he trailed his kiss up the bare thighs he lay between. “Look at you~ trying to clamp your thighs shut.” Gojo’s fingers were buried deep inside of you. Finger fucking you to the edge of yet another orgasm he would deny. “But you can't, can you~? Suguru’s got you all tied to the bed, spread out for us to use you.” A muffled moan escaped you. “Huh? What was that princess? You gotta use your big girl words.” Satoru tilted his head, cupping his free hand around the back of his ear. “Oooh! That's right, you can't talk when getting your throat fucked.”
You gagged as Suguru's cock hit the back of your throat. He was quiet, his eyes shut in concentration. He looked so fucking hot, so focused on the feeling of your mouth. Sweat was beading on his forehead as he pulled in and out of your mouth, grunting softly as you hollowed your cheeks. But the more Satoru spoke, the more Suguru knitted his eyebrows.
“I bet you want me to stuff your pussy, too, don't you~? You want to be spit-roasted between your two boyfriends?” Your pussy twitched at his words. “Oooh~!! Your cunt just twitched. Is that what our sweet girl wants—”
“Satoru,” Suguru snarled, “shut the fuck up.”
“Well, excuse the fuck out of me. Y/N likes it when I tease her.”
Suguru tsked, pulling his thick cock out of your mouth. You gasped and coughed, spit and precum coating your chin. Between your pants and the gasps for air, Suguru went to what you thought would be a head pat. Instead, his fingers tangled in your air with a hard yank, pulling you up to look down at Satoru. His face was flushed, cerulean eyes wide as he looked between his two partners.
“Look at the fucking slutty face she's making.” The grip on your hair tightened. “You think she looks like this because of your pitiful teasing?” A shaky moan escaped you as he tightened his grip harder. “No, she looks like this because this little slut likes it rough.”
Fuck, you wanted more, to run your hands over Suguru’s arms, to grip his cock, urging him to keep fucking your throat. You were desperate to trap Satoru's head firmly between your thighs, forcing him to kiss and lick your clit. Instead, you weakly tugged at the purple restraints tied to both your wrists and ankles. Suguru had set up the rigging underneath the mattress, making it impossible for you to move. Meaning if you wanted his cock back in your mouth or Satoru’s tongue inside of you, you had to wait for them.
What made it more frustrating was the fact that you were completely bare. Not allowing you to hide the way your body reacted to Suguru’s dirty words. He was telling the truth. And the truth was behind your body's reactions. Gojo could see it in the way your tight entrance clenched around his fingers. He could feel your pussy drip around him, your wetness running down his knuckles. Suguru was right; you did like it; no, like wasn't the right word.
You fucking loved it.
Suguru could see the wheels turning in Satoru’s head as his eyes glittered with lust and excitement. “Satoru~ do you finally see it?~” The way Suguru purred his name had Satoru’s cock throbbing. “You see why she came home, even though she knew she’d get fucked?”
“Yeah, yeah, she's a fucking slut.”
“Yeah, she is.” A sharp tug on your head made you yelp. Suguru grinned, cocking an eyebrow at you. “You want it rough? Want me to fuck your throat so hard you cry, pretty girl?”
“Y-Yes, please.”
Gripping his cock at the base, Suguru slapped his thick meat against your cheek. “That's a good girl. Now open up.” slowly, you opened your mouth to him. Watching your tongue slip out had his tip angry, throbbing red. “Now,” he smeared the beading precum over your bottom lip, “say ah~.”
“Ahh~” The second that sound left your pretty mouth Suguru shoved his cock in your mouth. Your eyes stung as tears filled your eyes.
Satoru’s fingers had stopped their slow movements inside of you. His mouth was dry as he gulped. Suguru had been rough before, but this was a whole new level. His thick fingers wrapped around your Y/H/C hair, holding your head in place. His hips pull back before slamming forward, his ass clenching with the force of each thrust. Blue eyes slowly trailed over to your face. Your eyes were red, big tears slowly down your cheeks, and your throat was fucked. Satoru swore he could see Suguru’s tip bulging in your slender neck.
This was fucking hot. Suguru’s bare back glittered in the low light of the bedroom, a sheen of sweat beaded over his toned muscles. It was like watching a god fuck a mortal Suguru radiated a dominating power as he watched their girlfriend choke and gag on his cock. Satoru’s cock was so hard it fucking hurt. Reaching down, he wrapped his hand around his throbbing shaft, jerking it slowly as he leaned down, kissing and nipping at your inner thighs.
The gentle kisses had you sighing contently around Suguru’s cock. Looking over his shoulder, Suguru sighed as he watched Satoru. His pink tongue was stuck out, gently teasing your damp folds. The sensation had you sighing around his dick, and that was not what he needed right this fucking second. Suguru wanted more; he needed it to relieve the tension in his shoulder. But that relief, the release he needed, wouldn’t happen, with Satoru teasing you like he loved to do.
“Satoru,” Suguru's voice was rough, “I just told you Y/N likes it rough.”
“Uh-huh~” Satoru’s voice was muffled as his face buried in your pussy, making you whine around the cock buried in your mouth.
“You’re not being rough enough.” Satoru pulled back, making you whine in protest. “Oh, I’m sorry. Do you want to come down here and eat Y/N’s pussy while I get my dick sucked?”
“No.” The cocky smile that was beginning to form on Satoru’s face was suddenly gone as Suguru reached his free hand down, wrapping his fingers in soft white hair. “I want you to fucking eat her cunt out like you fucking hate her.” Your eyes rolled back as Satoru was slammed back down into your pussy. The moan that left his mouth vibrated just right against our clit, making you cry out. “Ah~ fuck yes.” Your cries vibrated around Suguru’s cock, just the way he wanted. “That’s it, Satoru, keep it up.”
“Mmmmph.” Finally, having a picture of how Suguru wanted him to act, Satoru found himself motivated. Again, it might be because his boyfriend was tugging and pulling at his sensitive hairline. Yeah, that was motivating him. Fuck you like he hated you, he could do that. He was just as pent-up as Suguru was.
Fingers slammed inside your pussy, fucking in and out of your tight hole with a force and speed that had you crying out in pleasure. Your moans felt so fucking good, and the more you opened your mouth to cry, the deeper Suguru fucked your throat. He hit the back over and over again, his hand pressing firmly against Satoru’s head, pushing him harder against your clit. The two of you moaned while your mouths were being used; the sounds of whimpers, squelches, and gagging were like a symphony to Suguru’s ears.
Out of all the ways for him to relieve his stress, this was by far his favorite.
“Hah—fuck keep that up, Satoru, bring her right to the edge, then stop. I want her cumming with both of us inside of her. Fucking her so rough she has to call out of work tomorrow and Friday.” The thought of that had you pulling on your restraints. “Oooh oh, you like that? You like knowing the two of us will make sure you can’t walk or talk tomorrow?” Your muffled moans were quickly molded into gags as Suguru roughly fucked your face. “Yeah, you fucking do, you nasty little slut.”
Your mind was spinning as you felt yourself climbing closer and closer to your orgasm. The room was so hot and reeked of sex. It was all you could do not to allow yourself to cum right then and there. Satoru could feel it, the way your little swollen clit throbbed against his tongue, how your walls clamped down on his fingers. He wanted to send you over the edge. He was close to following you as he fucked his hips helplessly into the mattress, wishing it was your wet pussy instead.
One orgasm wouldn’t hurt, would it? You had been so good to them, allowing the duo to drag you into the house, strip you in the entryway, and tie you to the bed. Plus, on top of all that, they had left you alone for two weeks. You had to rely on that stupid vibrator Suguru insisted on allowing you to keep. That stupid toy was nothing compared to his tongue. Which was probably why he was bringing you to a mind-blowing orgasm in under three minutes.
Yeah, he was going to let you cum.
Curling his fingers up into your g-spot, Satoru fucked you as fast as his wrist would allow. Suguru instantly knew what was happening. From the way your eyes shut to how loud you were moaning around him, you were seconds away from cumming. If he was in a better mood, he might have allowed it to happen. Unfortunately, he wasn’t done with you yet.
“Stop.” Suguru scolded, pulling Satoru away from your dripping sex.
Both you and Satoru made disapproving groans as your orgasm slowly faded out of sight. “Doesn’t she deserve a treat? She’s been so good!” Satoru whined, licking your juices off his lips.
“I agree. Y/N does deserve a reward. But you need to give it to her in the roughest way that you can.” Suguru pulled his cock out of your mouth, allowing you to catch your breath. “Look at it this way. We get to blow off the steam while we make up for making her play with herself for two weeks.”
“Huh?” Those words struck a different chord in Satoru, and his cock twitched.
“Y/N, sweetheart, how often would you say you played with yourself when we were gone.”
You swallowed at the air greedily. “I don’t know, seven, maybe eight times.” Both your boyfriends shuddered, hearing the hoarseness of your voice.
“And out of all of those times, did you cum as hard as you do with us.”
“Not at all. They were all baby orgasms.”
Suguru shut his eyes, nodding his head. “See, Satoru, not only does our little slut like us rough and demanding, but we have to make up for those eight little orgasms.” When the dark-haired man looked back at Satoru, he saw a flash of white before your scream of shock and please bounced off the walls.
Suguru’s eyes were slightly wide as his brain tried to catch up with what his eyes had just witnessed. What he saw was Satoru balls deep inside of you. His thrusts were sloppy and needy, and fuck you looked as stunned as Suguru. One second you had been empty, pussy craving a cock deep inside of it from the denied orgasm. In the blink of an eye, Satoru was fucking into you more brutal than he’d ever fucked you before.
“I fucking told you, that toy was nothing compared to us.” Satoru snarled against the crook of your neck, digging his teeth into the sensitive skin. “Fucking stupid toy, not pleasing my girl.”
“Oh my—fuck, holy fuck!” You cried out, mouth wide open. Giving Suguru the perfect opportunity to get back to fucking your throat. The bittersweet taste of pre-cum had your mouth watering. He returned to the brutal pace he was in several minutes again.
“She needs that Satoru. What if we get sent on another long mission? She’s just supposed to suffer?” The thought of that had Suguru tilting his head, bangs falling in front of his eye. “You know what, I think you might be on to something. If we take her toy away, then we’d have to fuck her even harder the next time we get home.”
Satoru’s teeth sank harder into your neck as the tip of his cock slammed almost too hard into your cervix, making you scream around Suguru. “Exactly. Let me use reversal red on it, Y/N, please, baby.” You started to shake your head in a desperate plea to let you keep it. But Suguru’s cock in your throat made it impossible to do so. “What was that? Oh, right, you have your mouth full.” His lips moved against your pulse as his fingers dug into your hips. “Guess we’ll just have to say the way your clamping down on my cock is a yes in our book.” Your eyes darted up to Suguru, who had bought you the toy, for help.
“Mhmm fuck, yeah, I’m pretty sure she just hummed an ‘uh-huh’ around my cock.”
You wanted to argue, to fight against this rash decision, but you felt so good it was almost impossible to care. You were screaming around Suguru’s cock. Tears streaming down your face, leaving behind trails of mascara. They were both being so mean and rough. God, it was so fucking good. Who cared about a clit sucker when your throat and pussy were being fucked into next week.
“She’s close.” Satoru cried out, his balls slapping against your ass. “Oh fuck she’s hugging my cock so tight I’m going to explode Suguru.”
With blurry eyes, you glanced up at Suguru. His cheeks were flushed, and his eyes shut tight. “I know, oh fuck I know, I’m so close, Satoru, don’t fuckin’ stop, make her cum, make her cum so hard.” Both his hands grabbed your face fucking your throat roughly as Satoru cried out, his hand pressing roughly on your clit, rubbing it in fast circles.
That was all that you needed. You cried out, squirting all over Satoru’s crotch, abdomen, and the mattress. Your orgasm set a domino effect between your boyfriends. Suguru followed behind you, his body hunched over you, his hands gently squeezing your head as he filled your mouth full of his thick cum. You weakly tried swallowing all of it, but that was somewhat difficult as Satoru extended your orgasm.
His thumb continues to rub your clit until his face scrunch up, mouth open in a feral growl. Satoru's orgasm hit him like a punch in the gut. He fucked all three of you harder, closer to oblivion. The headboard slamming against the wall as the restraint dug into your wrists was the only thing grounding you to remain on Earth. Satoru didn’t let up on the rough thrusts until he felt his cum dripping around his cock onto the bed.
The throbbing pain in the back of your throat, deep inside of your pussy was all the confirmation you needed that your boyfriends had fulfilled their promise. Never in your life had you been fucked so roughly. But it was a pain that you warmly welcomed.
After coming down, Suguru was the first to move gently. The rough hands that had been holding you in a vice gently held you as he pulled his softening cock out of your mouth. “Lay down.” His gruff, gentle voice whispered as he helped rest you against a pillow.
“Oh fuck—“ Satoru lifted his head off your shoulder, “I haven’t cum that hard in a while.” He was so slow, pulling out of you, grimacing as you cried out. “Sorry, fuck I’m sorry, baby.”
You shut your eyes, listening to Satoru getting out of bed. You could hear water running in the bathroom as gentle fingers began undoing your restraints. “You did such a good job, Y/N,” Suguru whispered. “Such a good girl for us.” His praise had you humming happily as he made quick work of the rest of the ropes.
“Suguru, let’s order in, yeah?”
“Yeah, that sounds good.”
The next half hour was a blur of warm happiness. Satoru helped wash your body in a bubble bath before Suguru joined you, kneeling next to the tub, lovingly stroking your face and hair. After you were cleaned up, your hair brushed, and pajamas on. You crawled into your bed with fresh sheets and relaxed. Satoru and Suguru fluffed your pillows and brought you a cup of tea for your raw throat. When your dinner arrived, the three of you sat in bed together to eat as a B-grade horror movie played on the television.
After eating, Satoru left to throw out the take-out containers. “Mmm, thank you for letting us do all that,” Suguru said as he crawled into bed after his shower. “That mission, it was rough.”
“I’m always happy to help.” Your voice cracked, making Suguru frown. “Stop frowning,” you flicked his forehead. “I like it rough.”
The bed dipped, and Satoru wrapped his arms around your waist. “Y/N can handle it. She is dating the two strongest, after all.” Both you and Suguru scoffed, relaxing in the growing silence. “Oh, by the way, Y/N.”
“Yeah?” You yawned, snuggling into Suguru’s chest as he turned the bedside lamp off.
“Did you bring home my mochi?”
In the dark of the room, you heard a thump and Satoru’s whine before Suguru pulled the three of you closer to him. “Satoru shut the fuck up about the mochi.”
828 notes · View notes
electricmagazine · 1 year
Text
Public Shock as Megumi Fushiguro Refuses to do Promotional Video
The Jujutsu Kaisen star says he “doesn’t understand” why he was “suddenly grouped differently” for the interviews
The entertainment world was shaken on Monday when the Jujutsu Kaisen official twitter account announced that they were cancelling their planned promotional interviews due to “lack of participation” on the actors’ parts. While fans were outraged and demanded to know what happened, Megumi Fushiguro took a leap, stepped out, and took the blame.
“Stop sending hate mail to the cast,” he tweeted. “I chose not to be part of the interviews, and my friends stood with me. There were some problems, but we’re working through them.”
Tumblr media
The star went on to explain via replies that he felt the groupings for the interviews were problematic, and that there was a simple solution that he’d like the promotions team to employ.
In an interview with Electric Magazine, he said, “I don’t understand why I was suddenly grouped differently. For every other interview I did, specifically those for season one, I was grouped with characters and actors I was connected with – Yuji, Nobara, Satoru, whoever. Season two has brought in a few minor characters, including my character’s biological dad… I just don’t think my character should be grouped with his biological dad over his friends.
“Promotions thought it was a good idea to group our characters together because in the show, we’re related. But it doesn’t work like that. My character hates his dad, why are they putting us in an interview together?”
Fushiguro also specified that he meant no hate towards Toji, the man who plays his character’s father in the show, but he thought it made little sense for their characters to be in the same interview.
Other cast members also stepped in with messages of support for Fushiguro, including co-star Yuji Itadori and adoptive father Satoru Gojo.
“Biological relations mean nothing when someone has been abandoned. This may seem overdramatic to some, but these interview groupings are an insult to adoptive, found, and loving family,” the famous actor wrote.
Tumblr media
“No-one should have to bring up their personal life in public to have their voice heard. Everyone who has a brain would know these groupings are completely wrong. Stay strong Megumi, you’re doing the right thing,” Shoko Ieri replied to the emotive post.
“good for you megumi. stand up to those ignorant idiots,” Nobara Kugisaki tweeted, complete with a picture of her and Fushiguro together.
“Megumi’s character already has a dad. Biological does not mean family. Things will never be right until the producers understand this,” wrote Itadori.
“I will not being doing the interview until Megumi can do his,” was Kento Nanami’s bold stance.
Amongst a split and conflicted fanbase, the official twitter simply tweeted, “We did not realise our actors would feel strongly about their interview groups and we had no intention to offend. The groups will be fixed ASAP and hopefully the interviews will go ahead.”
Many viewers felt this was an unfeeling response to Fushiguro’s genuine problem, with one even replying, “This just proves that the industry doesn’t care. It’s not about whether the interviews can go ahead, it’s about why it was deemed appropriate to group Megumi with a minor, unrelated character in the first place.”
Outcry against the producers and promotions teams seemed endless, with #jjkpromo and #staystrongmegumi trending for weeks across all platforms. Most felt that it had been a stupid decision from the start, since Megumi was a main character and should therefore be with the other main characters regardless of who he was related to. Others felt that extra sensitivity was needed due to Fushiguro’s own background, which was clearly the root of his ‘interview strike’.
“Yeah, I’m adopted,” he told Electric Magazine. “And yeah, that’s probably why I care so much. But the point stands. This character is unrelated to mine; this character is a minor, abusive father who my character despises. It’s not okay to normalise healing those relationships or still associating these people together.
“If I was someone who was abandoned by an abusive father – and I’m not, but many people are – how would I feel to know that the media still considers us family? How would I feel knowing that society prioritises that biological relationship over the connections I’d built with my friends?
“I guess this could be seen as overdramatic. It’s just an interview. I know. But it represents so much more; it’s a signal flare from the media and I’m not willing to let it go past me.”
Eventually, even Toji stepped forward, tweeting, “I’ve been quiet because I don’t know what to say, but I see I need to say something. Megumi is right to protest this grouping. I thought it was odd that we were put together as we don’t even share any scenes, but I see know it could have become weaponised. #istandwithmegumi.”
Tumblr media
Electric will keep updating as events unfold.
164 notes · View notes
wisheduponastar · 10 months
Text
Origami Hearts (2k, M/M)
For Day 19 of @danganronpashipmonths Saioma month. Inspired by the prompt : First Kiss
Shuichi has been pining over Kokichi for a while. Over break - Kokichi asks Shuichi to make a paper heart for him, out of origami. And Shuichi complies, of course. But due to unforeseen events - he ends up with two paper hearts to give to Kokichi, and one isn't his. What happens when Shuichi mixes them up?
Or~ Shuichi and Kokichi bond for a while, when Kokichi asks for a paper heart. Shuichi ends up with two - and he gives Kokichi the wrong one
Read on Ao3 or below
Shuichi was trying to like Kaede’s twin sister; really he was. But it was getting harder and harder for him to keep a smile on the rare occasions she talked to him. Due to her moving, she’d recently settled into the area - and Hope’s Peak had generously accepted her as a temporary student, as she was the Ultimate Origami Master. It was only a temporary placement, however - much to quiet a lot of the class's relief.
It wasn’t that she was a horrible person… she just liked a lot of people. And not in a friendly, more cheerful way - but in the way that Kaito liked Maki, or the way Shuichi liked…
Well, it didn’t matter that much. As interested as she did seem in Kokichi, both Kaito and Rantaro seemed to have caught her eye more. Not to mention, Kokichi tended to avoid her when he could; he had gotten into a habit of immediately burying his face in Shuichi’s chest and pretending to fall asleep when she approached. The first few times it had made Shuichi stutter and blush furiously, but he had gotten slightly more used to it. He would still blush, but it would be more subtle now - and he could contain his crush to just smiling and looking down at Kokichi.
It also meant he could spend more time with Kokichi, without being the one to awkwardly instigate it. And he did enjoy spending time with Kokichi, because most of the time Aiko wouldn’t even end up bothering them, and they could just spend time together. Whether it was eating at lunch, or studying - or observing her as she tried to sneak up on Kaito or Rantaro.
Miu actually had a bet going around most of the class - when Maki would finally punch Aiko for trying to get with her boyfriend. Kokichi and Shuichi both said she wouldn’t, but everyone else had put somewhere between one to three weeks. So far, only Miu had been angry she’d lost her money. All in all, Shuichi was just happy he had something to laugh about with Kokichi.
“Shuichi, save me!”
Recognizing the overdramatic cries, Shuichi turned around almost immediately to see Kokichi barreling towards him. He didn’t even have time to formulate a response before Kokichi was in his arms, grinning up at him. Looking down, Shuichi matched Kokichi’s grin, “Hey Kokichi… um. How are you?”
“Terrible,” he responded, grinning, “But I’m doing better than Rantaro!”
“Rantaro?” Shuichi questioned for a second, the cogs turning in his mind, “Wait - did you abandon Rantaro to run to me?”
“Yup!” Kokichi looked up again, “And if you try to lecture me I’ll bury my head into your jacket so I can’t hear you.”
“Is that… supposed to be a threat?”
“Maybe,” even with the awkward angle, Shuichi could see Kokichi’s grin, “Unless you want me to be this close?”
“Of- of course not!” Shuichi can feel himself blushing more, and he tries to free himself from Kokichi’s grip.
“Nishishi, did I make you embarrassed?” Kokichi tilts his head, “You look preeetty red right now.”
“Kokichi, why did you run off like that?”
Having reached a point where he was (somewhat) safely out of Kokichi’s arms, Shuichi turned to look for wherever Rantaro was. Casually walking up to them, his eyes briefly flickered over the two, and he gave a small and knowing smile, “So you abandoned me for the detective, that’s cruel, Oma. Cruel.”
Finally turning away from Shuichi, Kokichi spun on his heel to face Rantaro, “I could never abandon my beloved Rantaro for long, y’know?”
“So randomly running off to hug Shuichi won’t be a regular thing?” Rantaro questioned, even if he didn’t seem that serious.
“Wait - randomly?” Shuichi looked down at Kokichi again, “You weren’t doing that because Aiko was being weird?”
“Who knows,” Kokichi turned side-on, so he could look at the both of them, “I am a liar, afterall.”
“Was she even interested in you in the first place?”
Nishishishi, you’re so distrusting!” Kokichi took a step closer, “Is it ‘cause I’m a liar, or you’re a detective, or both?”
“It’s because of… it doesn’t matter what it’s about. I’m just asking if you,” realising he wouldn’t get the truth out of Kokichi, Shuichi turned to Rantaro, “Is he just running off to me randomly?”
“Quite often, yes,” Rantaro smiled before laughing as Kokichi began to pout, a faint blush coming over him.
“Amami - I am most disappointed in you!”
“So sorry, Kokichi.”
“You should be,” Kokichi half turned his back to Rantaro, watching out of the corner of his eyes, “Now get down on your knees and beg for forgiveness!”
“Maybe later.”
With the last remark, Rantaro began to walk away, calling over his shoulder, “Have a nice time you two. Kokichi, behave.”
“Behave?” Kokichi huffed, “I’m perfectly reasonable, right Shumai?”
“Were you really lying about Aiko flirting with you so you could hang out with me?” Shuichi tried to stare into Kokichi’s eyes, to see if he was lying. But his eyes weren’t behaving like eyes at the moment, they were behaving like mirrors - just showing Shuichi’s affection back at him, and then Kokichi’s careful neutrality.
“She does sometimes flirt with me,” Kokichi admitted, “But I did just kinda use it as an excuse to bother people…”
Reaching up and pinching the bridge of his nose, Shuichi looked critically at Kokichi again, “Next time you want to hang out, just ask me honestly, ok?”
“So my Shuichi really wants to hang out with me?”
“Not your Shuichi.”
“So my Shuichi really wants to hang out with me?”
“Yes…” Even with a small sigh, he still smiled as Kokichi’s eyes lit up. Offering him a larger smile, he asked, “We have ten minutes before a lesson, do you want to hang out?”
“Of course not!” Kokichi skipped up to him, immediately linking their arms, “Where are we going?”
“Just to the library?” Shuichi suggested, his cheeks suddenly blushing as he realised what the two of them were doing. Just the two of them, spending time together alone; it almost sounded like a date. Kokichi grins up at him still, getting even closer, “Sure, you can be a nerd today.”
Shaking his head slightly, Shuichi began to lead him to the library - not caring they only had about ten minutes, or that this wasn’t a date. Shuichi was caring that he was with Kokichi. And he was happy with that, and that there was a slight blush on both of their cheeks. Even if Kokichi thought of this as nothing more than a way to get away from Aiko - Shuichi was seeing this as something. And when they settled down into the library, Kokichi fiddling with a random sheet of paper; it was still perfect.
“Can you do origami?” Kokichi asked suddenly, holding his hand out with the paper still there, a smile on his face.
Shuichi couldn’t help but frown slightly, why was he thinking of Aiko with them? But he answered anyway, “Yes, if not incredibly well. Why do you ask?”
“Just thinking,” Kokichi smiled, leaning in closer, “Can you give me a heart?”
“W-what?” Was Shuichi’s immediate response, before he realised the actual question, “Ah! Yes, I can make a heart… for you.”
Kokichi battered his eyelashes, “Will my Shumai make me something?”
“Of course,” Shuichi took the paper from him, looking at the dimensions and trying to see how easy it would be to make a heart, and what he would need to cut off. With the Ultimate Origami Master in their class, it certainly wouldn’t be great - but he would try. For almost five minutes, the remainder of the time they had, Shuichi tried to make the heart - while Kokichi watched, a small smile on his face.
Throughout the rest of class as well, Shuichi made Kokichi the paper heart he wanted. It was imperfect, but he felt it was like him - he was still proud of it. At the end of the lesson, he finally stood up - briefly slipping his hand into his pocket; it could be a surprise for Kokichi. The two made eye contact, and Kokichi grinned at him, calling out, “Don’t worry underling - I’ll get us good seats!”
Looking down, Shuichi realised he hadn’t packed up the rest of his equipment. With a sigh, he tried to put it away as fast as he could - eager to meet Kokichi again, even if they’d only been apart for an hour. Carefully putting his lid on his pen, Shuichi straightened and made for the door - before being blocked by Aiko.
It was remarkable, even for twins, how much the two sisters resemble each other. For a second, all he could do was blink awkwardly, before asking, “Can I help you?”
She beamed, “Yeah, you’re friends with Kokichi, right?”
“Yeah, I am,” Shuichi narrowed his eyes slightly, hand subconsciously shifting over his paper heart.
“Could you give him this?” Aiko smiled, holding out a paper heart. It was made of the same paper, but it looked much more professional, much better than his. But Shuichi still nodded, stiffly taking it in his hand and briefly running his thumb over it, “Of course.”
“Thank you so much!”
Leaving him, Shuichi waited for a second. He had given his word that he’d deliver Aiko’s heart to Kokichi, so he couldn’t just back down. Thinking as he walked, he decided he would give Kokichi the heart made by Aiko first - and then give Kokichi his own. Hopefully he’d still appreciate it.
Walking into the room, Shuichi looked around for a second before spotting Kokichi; sitting near the centre of the room, with a cheery smile and a large space around him. “Shuichi! I’m lonelyyyyy!”
Chuckling slightly, Shuichi sat down next to him, “Nice to see you again.”
“Do you have my sacrifice?” Kokichi demanded eagerly, eyes focused on the hand Shuichi was holding the heart in.
“Yes,” Shuichi said. Handing him Aiko’s one, he turned briefly to get his own out of his pocket - why had he put it in such an awkward position. Having it in his hand, Shuichi turned around again - staring at Kokichi to see something was slightly wrong. Kokichi was staring at him, smiling - if looking somewhat, shy.
His hand still held paper, but it was now flattened. For a second, Kokichi’s eyes darted back to the paper, and then back to Shuichi. And then Kokichi moved forward.
Acting quickly, Kokichi moved upwards - his lips pressing onto Kokichi’s, gently but firmly. It was as though someone had lit fireworks in Shuichi’s chest as they kissed, it was brilliant. It was everything he had ever wanted, but also so much more. There was something so intimate, so genuine in Kokichi’s actions. Leaning forward, Shuichi went into the kiss as well - the two of them in almost pure happiness. Kokichi kept kissing, almost not wanting to leave until they were out of breath - when he reluctantly drew away.
Still smiling, Shuichi’s heart continued to hammer - his cheeks continued to flush. And then everything hit him, all at once. Him and Kokichi had kissed. Him and Kokichi had kissed. In front of everyone in their school as well - even if it was completely silent in disbelief. Trying to gather his senses, Shuichi took a deep breath - still entranced by Kokichi’s eyes.
They were a more beautiful purple than Shuichi had ever appreciated. And they were sparkling with pure joy, pure affection, pure adoration. It took all of Shuichi’s effort to break the almost magical spell, but he whispered out, “Kokichi… why did you do that?”
“What do you mean?” For once, the carefully constructed mask was off. And confusion clouded his eyes, “What do you mean, why did I kiss you? You asked me.”
“I-” Shuichi was almost lost for words, “I asked you?”
“I wouldn’t lie about something like that,” Kokichi immediately grasped the paper, holding it up for Shuichi to see, “Look, it says ‘kiss me, please’.”
“Kokichi…” everything felt so magical, he didn’t even want to say it, “Kokichi, that's not my handwriting.”
“Then…” Kokichi’s mask slipped back on suddenly, along with a flash of anger, “Never mind.”
“Kokichi wait!” There was a conscious effort on S huichi’s part not to be embarrassed. And instead, he focused on his love. The one who had liked for so long, and the one who had just kissed him. “Just because I didn’t write it -doesn't mean I didn’t like it.”
“Lying’s my game, Shuichi.”
“I do love you, Kokichi!”
“W-What?”
“I love you.”
4 notes · View notes
thatfreshi · 1 year
Text
There’s Only So Much You Can Control (Markiplier x Reader)
(This was a request in my dms.) You and Mark end up planning a first date after Tyler figures out you guys like each other, and turns out the two of you become anxious blobs when it comes to being more than friends. Fluff, happy ending :)
First dates can be extremely daunting. Lots of questions pop up in the preparation for what could be a newly blooming relationship, but most of the time this anxious spiraling only leads to a bad experience. You’ve worked with Mark for a while now, participating in videos, the occasional edit. A couple weeks ago you and Tyler were hanging out, and you got to talking about if there’s anyone you’re interested in currently. Tyler, who is notoriously single, pretty much had nothing to discuss. However, you started seeing Mark in a new light recently, more than a friend or creative partner. Of course, you were playing a dangerous game by telling Tyler about this thought of yours, considering he has a hard time keeping things to himself. 
“You WHAT.”
Was his overdramatic response when you told him about your interest in Mark. It didn’t take long for Tyler to do some digging, and he found out Mark was also beginning to have this romantic interest crop up. So, in his fashion, Tyler threw the two of you together because he figured you two would never say anything yourselves. He was right, but that’s not something you’d admit to him. Instead of being a normal person and offhandedly telling one of you that the other was interested, he put all three of you in a group chat, proceeded to explain how you both were secretly into each other, and then left. You were busy working on something when the text chain began, and boy did it throw you off guard.
“Uh… what.”
Was all you could manage to type, which probably didn’t seem very romantic in any way. 
“This is why I don’t tell Tyler anything.”
You laughed to yourself.
“LMAO, ikr?”
Luckily things became a lot less awkward very fast. You sat back in your chair trying to think of something to say until Mark did that for you.
“So, I’m pretty sure if we don’t go out he will in fact kill us. So, I guess we better get planning?”
How was this happening right now? Perhaps your friend being nosey wasn’t the worst thing in the world after all. You decided to respond a little sarcastically, without thinking about how it would read over text.
“Hm, idk. Maybe not.”
“Oh. Okay. :(“
“WAIT I WAS KIDDING I DO WANT TO GO OUT.”
“Oh. Okay. :)”
The next thirty or so minutes were spent discussing what kind of first date to go on, which proved to be rather difficult. Dinner seemed boring, staying in was too boring, but there were also a ton of things you couldn’t really do without being recognized. Eventually you settled on dinner at somewhere a little more private, a high-end spot with a wide variety of exotic foods. It wasn’t your first choice, but it would have to do. Besides, Mark could probably make anything fun.
When the day of the date rolled around later in the week, you spent probably two hours getting ready. Obviously you dress pretty casually in videos and the like, but you figured this was a much more serious occasion. Then again, you didn’t want to be overdressed. But would underdressed be worse? You decided to go overboard, because then at least it wouldn’t be underwhelming. The two of you hadn’t seen each other for a little bit, but you had been texting on and off since Tyler’s little chat stunt. Turns out, you were both really bad at texting under these circumstances. And as fate would have it, you were also really bad at talking to each other as well.
While you were putting the last finishing touches on your outfit and such, your phone dinged with a notification from Mark.
“Five minutes out.”
You almost forgot to respond between all the excitement and anxious nausea.
“Yay!!”
You were hoping that he would end up finding your apartment okay, which he did thankfully. There is certainly another universe where he forgot which number yours is and knocked on a stranger’s door. But no, he knocked on yours, and you held back the urge to throw up when you heard knuckles on the door. Instead, you nervously put one foot in front of the other and made it to the doorknob, undoing the lock with shaking hands. When you finally opened the door after what felt like hours of working up the courage, he was there in the doorway, holding a vase of flowers. Your eyes darted between the flowers, his face, and the fact that he was WAY more dressed up than normal. You silently thanked the stars that you decided on being overdressed. Apparently Mark was also speechless, as he looked like he was about to drop the vase. You quickly went to grab it from his sweaty palms and awkwardly smiled, taking it into the kitchen. When you realized he was just kind of idling in the doorway, you realized you hadn’t said anything.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry. You can come in.”
He took a few steps into the space, stuffing his hands in his pockets.
“It’s alright. Nice place.”
You forgot to respond as you changed the water in the vase. It was clearly a custom bouquet from some nice place. You thought about how he must’ve rushed to get this ordered in the past few days. You turned to walk out of the kitchen, but Mark was walking to meet you there, and so you ran into each other.
“Ah, I’m- I’m sorry. I am like not paying attention at all and like honestly I thought I was gonna throw up before you got here, I do not know what I’m doing right now.”
“Oh, are you okay? We can do this another-”
“No, like I’m so nervous right now and I thought it was gonna make me vomit.”
You let out a meek laugh and realize that you’re not even looking at him, hands still shaking.
“Well, if it makes you feel any better I’m really nervous too, and I kind of thought about taking a U-turn on the way here like five different times.”
He chuckles, almost under his breath. You finally look at him again, trying to steady your breath.
“You uh, you look really nice. Like I knew you were capable of dressing up because you like go to award shows and stuff but uh, I’ve never seen it in person.”
“Well I’ve never once seen you dress nice so…”
You playfully punch his arm.
“Okay just because I’m awkward does not mean you get to make fun of me.”
You finally share a laugh, and it’s not quiet and petrified. Your mind starts to clear and you forget why you were so scared to go on this date in the first place. It’s the same guy you’ve always known, and besides, if he’s nervous too then hey, at least you can be awkward together.
“Sorry, sorry. I was trying to say that I’ve never seen you dress nice BUT, it’s a nice change.”
You smile, taking a sarcastic bow.
“Oh wow, we have royalty over here guys.”
Mark jokes, turning to the personless air around him. 
“So, are we doing this?”
“Hm, maybe not. I actually have this thing I forgot about-”
You glare at him and tap your foot like some kind of impatient cartoon.
“Okay, okay yeah, we’re doing this.”
And so the two of you finally make your way out of your apartment. You wonder if you’ll be late for your reservation, but if so oh well. There’s only so much you can control, and getting over your fear and enjoying this date is something you can control, so that’s all you decide to focus on as you walk to his car. 
19 notes · View notes
purplespaceace · 3 years
Text
very few characters actually have adhd in media, and when they do, what people mean by that is just that they fidget a lot, not that they have adhd. the only character with adhd I can think of where I’ve watched/read it and I’ve gone, “oh, this character actually has adhd” is Jake peralta from Brooklyn 99. so, here’s my take on how to write adhd, with examples from Brooklyn 99.
I’ll do the best I can to separate them into three categories; the three things people look for in adults with ADHD, which are rejection sensitivity dysphoria, an interest-based nervous system, and emotional hyperarousal.
I’ll also randomly bold and italicize bits so people with ADHD can actually read it.
Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria, or RSD
Rejection sensitivity dysphoria makes people with ADHD overly sensitive to criticism, even if they perceive a rejection and there actually isn’t one. Their emotions are also very strong generally. Because of RSD, people with ADHD become people-pleasers and can develop anxiety because they’re so eager to please.
For me, RSD makes me cry an embarrassing amount for any little reason. in your writing, make your characters overdramatic, criers, and/or people-pleasers. They’ll have trouble saying no. They may also be over competitive, as their perceived rejection may include losing.
how does Jake show this in b99? When Jake comes up with a catchphrase and Rosa says it’s terrible, jake is far more hurt than he should be. He hates losing, and he gets overly upset whenever someone says they don’t like him or don’t trust him, etc. he’s also a people pleaser who has trouble saying no.
An interest-based nervous system
An interest-based nervous system includes hyperfocuses and an inability to pay attention. It stems from the fact that we can’t make as much dopamine as neurotypicals. This means that while neurotypicals get dopamine after completing a task, people with ADHD don’t. That means that people with ADHD don’t have any reason to do tasks, especially those they don’t like. This leads to executive dysfunction—people with ADHD will know they have to or want to do something, but they can’t seem to do it. people with ADHD hyperfocus on things that bring them dopamine. I was obsessed with warrior cats for three years. But hyperfocuses can also last a short amount of time—I’ll have a drawing idea in the middle of class and won’t be able to concentrate on anything else before I finish it. this is where our impulsiveness comes from. we can leap into things we think will give us dopamine without thinking, which can lead to injury. We also tend to tell people personal things they don’t want to hear because of this, and don’t have very good boundaries. We sometimes say whatever comes into our head, which can also result in us being rude on accident. Our voices can also get very loud or we can interrupt people frequently because we’re so impulsive. When people with ADHD hyperfocus, they can forget about anything else. I’ll forget to eat if I’m busy reading a Wikipedia article about feminism in the 1850s, and won’t go to the bathroom or drink water either. It’s also important to note that taking away distractions doesn’t help, because we can do things like pick at our skin and daydream—something that people with ADHD do a lot of. Because of executive dysfunction, people can call people with ADHD lazy or irresponsible.
people with ADHD can also be extremely indecisive because ADHD affects our executive functioning, and making decisions requires planning and prioritizing, and task initiation, which are both executive functions!
people with ADHD also have poor memory for important things, but tend to remember random bits of trivia. Poor memory leads to object permanence problems, which means people with ADHD can forget to call a friend back for weeks, forget that they need to read library books in a closed cabinet, or forget that the vegetables they got will go bad. People can sometimes say that people with ADHD don’t care about anything because of this.
people with ADHD can also be prone to depression because of under or overstimulation. Boredom feels painful for people with ADHD. If we’re overstimulated, we can experience sensory overload—if things are too bright or too loud, if too many things are touching us at once—often it’s not because the thing is too intense, but because too many things are happening at once.
We also have something some people call dolphin brain, where we jump from one thing to another. From the outside, it looks really random, but I find that when I’m talking to another neurodivergent communication is generally easier. For instance, someone with ADHD might see a bee at a baseball field and tell their team about the time they saw whales at seaworld because their little brother was also stung by a wasp there. people will see no connection on the outside, but it makes perfect sense to the person with ADHD.
people with ADHD can also be overachievers, either because they hyperfocus on schoolwork or their RSD makes it so that failing at something isn’t an option. people with ADHD can also be very controlling and stubborn, probably because we hyperfocus on something and cant handle it being any different, and any change to our plans can be seen as rejection.
we can also have a hard time ordering our thoughts or doing stuff like math in our head. a lot of the time I number my thoughts like, 1. this reason, 2. this reason, etc. even if theres only two or sometimes I just need the 1. as a transition for my brain. when I don’t write it down or organize it like that it feels like I’m trying to grasp ropes that have been covered in oil (it’s not going to happen) and then my brain gets all jumbled and I have to restart at the beginning. this is probably just me, but it feels the same way when I’m reading long paragraphs of something uninteresting, or even short bits of historical documents because the way they phrase things is really pompous and hard to process.
also, stuff like caffeine calms us down and helps us focus. people who don’t take medication (me) often drink coffee or caffeinated sodas to focus.
another random tip, but if your character with ADHD also is genderfluid or genderflux, they might have a hard time figuring out their gender sometimes, because we can be known to have a hard time putting our feelings into words or our brains will just go, “nope, not thinking about that right now” and move on, which can be pretty frustrating.
people with adhd also have a trait called time blindness, where we have no idea how long something takes and therefore can’t manage our time very well. this often results in us being late or just sitting around the house because we got ready way too early.
we also have something called consequence blindness—we do things and are completely unaware of the consequences. if I don’t brush my teeth, I get cavities. but I don’t think about that when I’m deciding I’m too tired to brush my teeth.
in b99, jake regularly stays up all night solving cases and watches documentaries on random topics. He’s also very distractible—when they’re trying to find the person who sent Captain Holt death threats in the train yard, Jake says he and captain holt should take a train trip together sometime. Jake says that he’ll forget Amy if they don't work together because he’s like a goldfish.
Emotional hyperarousal
This is the only thing people tend to include when writing characters: the fidgeting. People with ADHD tend to need more stimulation than others, so we’ll do things like draw during class and chew on pens.
people with ADHD can also have apd, or auditory processing disorder. we tend to watch shows with subtitles on and may take a second to process what you’re saying, or hear it wrong. The subtitles thing may be partially do to creating just the right amount of stimulation, but if I don’t have subtitles, me and my other friends with ADHD will watch tv with the volume turned up very high. People with ADHD also can have a hard time interpreting other people‘s tone and have a hard time controlling their own. They can be bad at social cues and have poor manners because we don’t pick up on that stuff.
people with ADHD also tend to observe everything or nothing at any given time, mostly based on the amount of stimulation they have—if they dont have a lot in their main task, they’ll need to take in something else at the same time. Likewise, if I’m hyperfocusing on something I often don’t notice anything else, like if someone asks me a question.
in b99, Jake fidgets with things a lot. In the intro, he’s picking up and examining a figurine on his desk, likely because he was bored with paperwork or some other task.
2K notes · View notes
hangovercurse · 3 years
Text
I’d Drop it All for You
Pictures of you and Pete are spread all over the internet, causing a whirlwind of hate to enter your social media.
Request: “Pete content please! anything !!! smut fluff whatever”
Pete x Reader
Warnings: Cursing, depictions of depression and anxiety
A/N: *Insert normal spiel about respecting A.G. and only using her for plot purposes. No harm intended.* Also I wrote most of this after a meeting with my therapist so... enjoy :) (He’s so cute in this gif I wanna kiss his face)
Word Count: 1820
Tumblr media
You weren’t one of those people who loved being the center of attention. You knew that being in the spotlight also meant constantly living under a microscope, and you decided a long time ago that that was not for you.
But you were lucky enough to work as an assistant art director at just 24. You were hoping that The King of Staten Island, your newest project, would help get your name out into the professional world. But that wasn’t the only thing to come out of the film.
It happened unexpectedly, you showed up on set the first day, ready to do whatever the art director required of you. You couldn’t help but be slightly distracted by the lead actor and writer, Pete Davidson. He was so kind and funny, and he wasn’t uptight like everyone else.
After a few hours of filming, he came up to you, introducing himself. He said he “wanted to get to know everyone working on the project,” but you didn’t see him introducing himself to anyone else. You two started talking during breaks. Then he started sitting with you at lunch. Then he was asking for your number.
In a matter of weeks he was asking you out to dinner, taking you to a cozy restaurant that you absolutely adored. He walked you home, his hand grazing yours until you intertwined your fingers.
It was all very romantic, so when Pete asked if he could take you on another, you obviously said yes. Flash forward two weeks and he finally got the courage to ask you to be his girlfriend, even though you were both exclusively seeing each other already.
After filming ended 2 months later, you were still working on the film in post, which meant you had an excuse to stay  in Staten Island with Pete. After about 2 weeks in post, you spent more nights in his bed than your hotel’s.
Nearly 6 months later and you were happier than ever. You were splitting your time between your small apartment in the Bronx and Pete’s basement apartment. Pete introduced you to most of his friends, and you introduced him to yours.
But other than your small circles of friends, you kept your relationship fairly quiet. Pete doesn’t have social media and yours is strictly professional, so there are no pictures of you two together. You weren’t hiding each other, you loved each other, you just had no reason to tell tabloids. And you were perfectly happy with that.
Which made it so much worse when various news sites had pictures of you two holding hands. Had they been anyone else you would’ve thought they were cute, walking along the South Beach oceanside at night.
Pete had been in the SNL studio all day when the pictures were released, while you were in his apartment, trying your best to focus on the photoset in front of you. The production team wanted the film to scream “teen romance,” which basically entails subtle pink undertones and a higher saturation. But you couldn’t quite get the coloring right, probably because you weren’t actually focusing on the colors.
You sighed, looking at the time and realizing that Pete won’t be back until sometime after 2am, which was a whole 5 hours away. You let out a huff, pushing away from the desk and making your way to Pete’s closet and searching for one of his hoodies. They always smelled like him (and weed), so it was a comfort to you.
You crashed onto the bed, finding the phone that you had tossed there a few hours earlier. Turning it on you were surprised by the number of notifications you were getting. You knew the photos had surfaced but you weren’t expecting this.
Your Instagram was blowing up with new follows, likes, and comments. It was kind of exciting at first until you started reading some of the comments.
I mean, we knew he would downgrade from Ari, but this is like… really far down.
This girl really thinks she’s special just bc Pete’s dating her. Hun he could do so much better
Who is she?!? Literally no one.
Someone needs to show her how to dress
That hairstyle is not it honey
Pete Davidson is dating YOU??? He could do sooo much better
Ari was prettier sorry not sorry
The entire comment section on your last post, a picture of you on the set of your latest film, was pretty much the same. There were some nice comments, but a lot of mean ones.
And you couldn’t help it, you couldn’t stop looking at them. It felt so cliché, but it was like all of your deepest insecurities about being with Pete were thrown out on the table.
You knew that Pete had a fairly large following, and that a lot of people had really strong feelings about him. You had expected that if and when your relationship went public you would have a lot of people watching you, scrutinizing you. But you didn’t care because Pete was worth it.
Now you weren’t so sure. It wasn’t that you couldn’t handle people talking bad about you, because you definitely could, even if it hurt. You just weren’t expecting the amount of people comparing you to Ariana or saying that Pete could do so much better.
And it only bothered you so much because you felt it too. Your inner demons loved to remind you that Pete had dated Ariana fucking Grande and now he’s dating you. Anyone could see an obvious downgrade.
You turned your phone off and threw it on the opposite side of the bed, trying to think positive thoughts. “I am in control of my own thoughts and emotions. I am catching my negative thoughts and fixing them.” You murmured your therapist’s mantra to yourself, but it was too late. The thoughts had already taken hold of your mind.
Your eyes started to water as you could feel the heavy feeling in your chest set in. You pulled the hood over your head, pulling the straps to hide as much of your face as possible, and pulling your knees to your chest. You laid like that for a while, tears falling as doubts ran through your head. Once you had effectively exhausted your thoughts, you went numb. Your tears had stopped, but you couldn’t move. This wasn’t an unfamiliar feeling, but it sure wasn’t pleasurable.
There was a sort of buzzing throughout your body, almost like the feeling when your foot falls asleep, but everywhere. It seemed to block out your sound, as you didn’t hear the basement door open. You only knew that Pete was home when he sat beside you on the bed, pulling the hood off your face.
“There’s my beautiful girl.” He smiled at you. You tried your best to fake one back, but you honestly couldn’t find the energy. Pete pulled you so you were sitting up, back pressed against his front. His arms wrapped around your middle as he pressed a kiss to your temple. “What’s goin on?” He murmured against your skin.
“Did you see them?” You asked, your voice quiet and hoarse.
Pete let out a sigh, “Yeah, I saw them.” He paused, his hold on you getting tighter, like he was making sure you couldn’t leave. “I’m sorry baby. I know you didn’t want it to be a whole big thing.”
You turned your head to face him, “It’s not that. I really don’t mind that people know. We weren’t trying to hide anything.”
He smiled, “Yeah, I know I just- it was nice having this to ourselves.”
He wanted to hide you. He’s embarrassed of you.
Your inner dialogue never seemed to shut up.
You turned away from Pete, trying to hide the tears forming in your eyes. “Yeah.” You whispered.
“What’s wrong, you’re still upset.” He rocked you in his arms, kissing the top of your head. You shrugged in response, not trusting yourself to talk. “You can talk to me, y’know.”
You nodded, leaning further into Pete’s chest. “People found my Instagram.” You murmured, looking down and tracing the arrow tattoo on his hand.
“Whaddya mean? I thought it was public?” He furrowed his eyebrows.
You sighed, wishing you hadn’t said anything. “Yeah, it is. But after all the articles people started following me and shit.”
“I would ask how that’s a problem but I deleted my Instagram so I can’t really talk.” You could tell he was trying to make you feel better, but you couldn’t seem to get out of your haze.
You shook your head, deciding to drop the matter. “It’s not, I’m just being overdramatic.” You sighed, putting on a fake smile and facing him fully. “Wanna watch a movie?” You asked, trying to change the topic.
He gave you the I-know-you’re-bullshitting-me look, which made you look down. “Something’s bothering you, Y/N. And you’re trying to pretend it doesn’t because you think your feelings aren’t valid, but they are.” He tilted his head, trying to meet your eyes that were still trained on the bedsheets below you.
“Where’d you learn that one?” You chuckled half-heartedly.
“Rehab part 2” he smiled, hand coming to your jaw to tilt your head up. “C’mon, talk to me. I wanna help.”
You huffed, moving towards the opposite side of the bed where your phone laid. You opened it, finding your Instagram, and showing him the comments. His eyebrows furrowed as he scrolled through the comments. When he decided he’d had enough he put your phone down, grabbing your waist and lifting you onto his lap so you were essentially straddling him.
He leaned his forehead against your own, your noses touching. “That’s all bullshit, you know that, right?”
You looked down, biting your lip. “Y/N you’re the most amazing, most beautiful woman I’ve ever met, okay? I’m in love with you, not anyone else.” Pete’s eyes were searching yours, trying to figure out what was going on in your head.
“I know.” You sighed, “It’s just hard to be with you and not compare myself to her. And then all these people started to do it too, and they kept saying that you could do so much better and you can. So, I dunno I guess I just kind of spiraled.”
Pete captured your lips in a long, passionate kiss. “Y/N. There is literally no better than you. I can’t do better because you are the best woman I have ever loved. “
You pulled Pete in for another kiss. “Thank you, Pete. I love you.”
“I love you too. If this happens again, I want you to call me. I don’t care what I’m doing, I’d drop it all for you.” You smiled, sitting in the arms of the guy you loved. The thoughts didn’t just magically go away, but for a brief moment in time, you were happy.
734 notes · View notes
wizkiddx · 3 years
Note
hiiiii i love your stuff - could u do one where the readers ill but they have stuff to do and tom has to look after her. maybe if they were just friends before too but both pining? thankuuuuuuuuu
should I be writing this instead of revising? clearly fucking not. Did I make this little blurb req ridiculously long purely to procrastinate? Of fucking course.
but also this was v cute! I assumed u meant famous!reader, sorry if that's not what u were after at all anon x
summary: Tom Holland turns into the readers knight in shining armour when they get ill during promo
warnings: fainting / feeling ill
///////////////////
It couldn’t be today. Of all days, why today? You’d been at home for two weeks doing absolutely nothing, before this trip. And yet it’s when your itinerary is packed to the brim, people moving heaven and earth just speak to you. Two weeks of unrelenting press for Marvels next big ensemble movie. 
Your manager was speaking to you, reeling off a run down of todays activities but instead of listening you nodded along blankly - head rather cloudy with this heavy mist that was not shaking off, no matter how hard you tried. 
“You got that Y/n/n?” Lucy pointedly spoke, eyes almost physically knocking you backwards as if her eyeliner was battery rams. Fumbling with your thoughts, your answer wasn’t particularly cohesive earning you just a disappointed head shake. 
“I um… yeh I think. Who-who did you say I was paired up with?” 
“Y/n please for the love of god. Tom, like I said the past fifty times.” And to be fair to Lucy she wasn’t wrong. It was the first major major promo tour for the both of you and after just two days so far - you were both exhausted. She was more than allowed to be a bit short tempered. 
“But we-we hardly know each other? The chemistry won’t be there and-“
“As I said, I tried to re-jig it but Kevin is of the mind that acting is your job.” Her tone was sharp but as she glared across the opposing seats, in the little mini van Marvel had hired for you as transportation, her eyes softened. Lucy had been so wrapped up in her own stress she may have overlooked quite how gingerly you were sitting. By the time she had arrived at the hotel, your stylist had already managed to half save your ghoulish looking face, with sunken under eyes and tired skin, so it wasn’t so blatantly obvious how crap you were feeling.  “Is everything okay with you?” 
It felt pretty puny to say that the jet lag from flying to Tokyo had been weighing you down further than you wanted, or that the local cuisine top chefs had kindly prepared for you last night wasn’t siting well in your stomach. To be honest, even you thought it was just your body being a bit overdramatic. So in response, you put on your best happy-go-lucky face feigning a smile.
“No no I’m fine, just want to give the best interviews I can and you know…. I’m awkward as hell as it is, then pair me with the most talented actor that I share about two minutes of screen time with…it’ll be interesting.” 
The way Lucy reacted with a weird slow nod, eyebrows furrowed, meant it was quite apparent you had perhaps overplayed that one. Had you not been so over the day before it even began, you would’ve tried again to give a more believable act. But as you were, you turned your attention back out to the bustling streets of Tokyo and the high rise buildings bordering each pavement. 
You didnt have a problem with Tom, far from it in fact. Tom was hilarious and the times you had met him, you’d both built up this weird and sarcastic competitiveness with each other. It was a game of who could get the last laugh, each of you pushing each other with the Mickey taking just a little further. Of course, not in a malicious way, just the way you’d both lived pretty similar but parallel careers - when everyone drew comparisons between the both of you, it was nice to make it a joke. 
Like Tom you’d also started out on stage, had a ‘big break’ movie as a kid and then spent your teenage years on and off film sets - till marvel happened. Then everything blew up to epic proportions, changing your life forever. Actually, it was so similar to Tom’s story, plus the fact you were also from the south west of the UK. It was bizarre your paths hadn’t crossed more - He probably could’ve been a useful ally in the the whole ‘becoming famous’ thing. 
And yet, you could probably count on two hands the amount of conversations you’d had with him. 
Now that, that was the issue. Right from the beginning you learn what the press want and when you are publicising a movie you cater into it too. They’d all be asking for the insider scoop on set; what pranks you’d pulled on each other; what was the most annoying thing about each other. Which is hard if you’d only had 5 or 6 days actually on set together. 
By the time the cab had wormed its way through the Tokyo traffic and you arrived at the PR hotel, it was already 9:30 - making you 15 minutes late (blame it on the traffic). Instantly then you were ushered straight to the interview room for the evening, no chance of green room chat or grabbing a drink before. The place was stuffy, everything was draped with black curtains except the poster board that Tom was already sitting infront of. 
He’d scrubbed up well, no doubt about it. He was wearing statement-ish burgundy suit trousers, teamed with a black knitted but collared shirt thing - that was clearly tailor made for the man. As soon as he noticed you scurry into the room, his face broke out into a warm smile, jumping up to greet you in a friendly hug. It was brief, and as you pulled back you accidentally bumped your head on one of the overhanging lights. No doubt someone had spent a ridiculous amount of time configuring them so they were positioned perfectly, which you had just ruined with your big head. 
“Oh shit!” Tom just laughed in response, shaking his head slightly as he lead you the two steps across to your pre-positioned seats. 
“Making an entrance as always I see!”
“Yeh, you know me, a bit of chaos just to keep everyone on their toes.”
“Oh is that why you’re ‘fashionably late’” With a playful wiggle of his eyebrows, you just rolled your eyes, fidgeting on the chair to find a position that didnt aggravate  your stomach so much.
“I’m ready now though! What did I miss? Just having to pretend to be your friend for 15 minutes?” You stressed the words as though the thought of conversation with Tom was the absolute worst thing in the world - which you definetly didnt think. Scowling like you’d insulted his dog Tessa, it was almost visible how the cogs were turning in his head looking for a comeback. Unfortunately for him though, he was quickly shut up but the organiser bringing the first interviewer in . 
For what would, no doubt, be a long day. 
////
Everything had started off so well, the banter was flowing between you and Tom, no major spoilers revealed that meant Marvel would have to make the journalist disappear. It was once you hit an hour of back-to-back interviews that everything started to crack bit. Because yes, it had only been an hour but that was enough to exhaust you on this particular day. When Tom joked around you got slower and slower, similarly the  energy was zapped from your own answers. It’s not very compelling when someone says ‘you have to watch this movie’ in a monotonous voice with sullen eyes. 
As the interviewers were swapping in and out, Tom actually lightly nudged your shoulder.
“Everything alright? We’re trying to sell tickets and you’ve got a face like thunder.”
“Oh no-no sorry I just, I-um.”
“You want some water?” Now looking at your with more concerned eyes, as if he was just nervous he’d actually offended you for calling you a boring bastard. And you would’ve picked up on it and alleviated his concerns, if it weren’t for the fact your eyes were glued on the water bottle he was holding out to you. You were thirsty. You knew that, that wasn’t the conundrum. What you weren’t so sure about was whether your stomach would accept it, or more violently reject it. In a very non ‘we’re-trying-to-sell-a-movie’ style. 
But the lightheaded fogginess in your brain won out, as you nodded jerkily, taking the bottle and taking a little swig - too cautious to take anymore. 
Now concerned with how Tom thought you were being a Debby-downer too, you managed to perk yourself up for the next four interviews. They were easy, asking questions without any activity and though you did rely on Tom beefing out and adding to your answers, it was okay. Then the next interviewer came in, who you recognised as being from the BBC, Ali Plumb, that had interviewed you a number of times. From the way Tom jumped up to give him afirendly bro-hug, you guessed he also was familiar with him. As soon as he took a seat the cameras were already flashing with the red light, demonstrating his 7 minutes had already started. 
“Guys! It’s been a while.” 
“How are you Ali?” You started it off with the pleasantries, Tom echoing, before the speccy dirty-blonde asked his first question. 
“So the last time I spoke to you guys the universe was in chaos, Peter Parkers on the run and Aurora Blake was trying to strip her own powers, so I guess my first question is how are you both doing? We can use this as a therapy session if you guys need.” His very typical nerdy joke made Tom laugh, nodding as he leaned forward and repositioned a bit. 
You didn’t share the same humour though, more focused on this invisible blanket of stuffiness that seemed to have been thrown on top of you. It made you feel groggy, incredibly hot and so unbelievable nauseous. The lights weren’t helping either, it felt like you were pouring with sweat from your forehead. You thought Tom was answering Ali, even if you couldn’t really hear  - everything had merged into a deafening roar. Adrenaline coursed through your veins, unconsciously making you fumble yourself to standing, desperate to get somewhere with fresh air. The last thing you saw before your vision tunnelled into darkness was Tom, reaching out to try and catch you. 
Because next thing you knew, you were on the floor, wires from all the cameras and lights digging into your back as you looked up to see Tom on one side and Lucy on the other - both wearing a similarly panicked expression. You knew you hadn’t been out long, seconds if that, going by the fact everyone else was in the ‘oh my god’ phase of panic. It was a bit weird how calm you where, but then again all your life you’d been the ‘class fainter’. Waking up on the floor was something you were long since used to. 
“Y/n? You awake?” Rather stating the obvious Tom asked the question as you bent your head up - allowing you sight of all the concerned facing oggling you. With a defeated sigh, you flopped your head back. 
“If this is a dream then it’s a real bloody nightmare.” This time Tom didnt seem to appreciate your joke, looking at you without almost dumbfounded eyes, as you blinked repetitively and groaned. 
“Why didn’t you say anything?” Lucy appeared to want to lecture you, which to be honest wasn’t the most time appropriate. You were still on the floor, legs crumpled up under you, so ignored her. Instead you pulled yourself up into a sitting position, taking a moment to blink away the blotchy haze that threatened to takeover your vision once again, whilst the pair above you both cautiously rested their palms on each of your shoulders -trying to be useful. The room still felt cramped and stifling, as everyone around were no doubt looking at you. 
It took a few minutes but your body seemed to get over itself, sitting up normally and trying to make small talk with Ali - who, by the way, was still sat awkwardly in the chair. Still nestled on the floor, your back up against the chair you had been siting on as you raved with Ali of the Harry Potter theatre show. In a natural lull in conversation, Tom perked up - from the door where he’d been muttering with the organiser as Lucy bit her nails nervously. 
“Y/n you need to go home.” 
All of you knew what Tom said was impossible. Not being egotistical, but you were too important. Although you hadn’t been paying masses of attention for Lucy’s run down of your itinerary - you knew it was packed. 
So you just looked up and rolled your eyes at Tom, earning yourself a strong glare, before locking the organiser in eye contact.
“How many have we got till lunch?” 
“Um this gent here” He gesturned toward Ali, who was almost squirming in his seat now “then two more.”  
“And then lunch?” 
“Yes, then you have a personal appearance at a dinner, so transport will be coming to pick you both up.” This poor guy seemed obsessed with the clock and his timetable, looking at your with a mixture of panic and frustration. You should know this stuff, you should’ve listened to Lucy. 
“How fars the drive?” 
“At this time probably an hour and a half.” 
The plan was clear in your head, you’d sort yourself out in the car and be fully fine by the afternoon and evening engagements. Plus you felt almost fine now. So with a sigh, you hauled yourself up onto the chair, patting for Tom to sit back down. 
“It’s half an hour and then I’ll sort myself out at lunch - come on their waiting.” The way Lucy pouted showed she disagreed somewhat, except a stern look kept her from protesting, as Tom walked toward you. 
“Are you sure you don’t loo-“
“Let me stop you before you insult my appearance.” Snickering slightly at his worried face, you laughed it off , knocking his side with a gentle murmur of ‘don’t worry about me’. 
In fact after that little episode you did feel a little recovered, which meant you were properly noticing the change in the boy sat next to you. Throughout the remaining three interviews he’d done a complete 360 from earlier. Rather than trying to get little digs at you, he had become fiercely protective - jumping in if a questions wasn’t particularly appropriate or relevant to the movie ( meaning when an awfully crap man asked what underwear you’d been able to wear in your suit) ; taking the heat of the conversation as well as just watching you like a hawk. Each time you answered his beady brown eyes were watching you from the side, you got the impression it wasn’t only just because of the risk of spoilers. 
Quite remarkably, you survived the rest of the day pretty well, after a power nap in the car on the way over - even if it was a bit difficult when you had your manager watching you like a hawk from the seat across. It was as if Lucy had never seen anyone ill before, she seemed concerned that you were going to spontaneously stop breathing and die at any point. 
Though by the time all the official business at the dinner was done, your body and willpower had reached the end of their tether. You and Tom were both on a round table, surrounded by 6 CEOs and execs of what seemed to be a multimillion pound business enterprise. With the language barrier meaning you had to speak through the two people on the table who were fluent in both japanese and English, the conversation was already pretty jilted. Though to be fair, the six did seem to be enjoying the evening - something you werent able to reciprocate. Thankfully, five minutes after the main course dishes had been collected, Tom spoke up from his position opposite you.
“This has been lovely and we really appreciate your time and generosity but me and Y/n have a really early start tomorrow so I think we should probably get back to the hotel.” You swore in that moment you could’ve kissed him, and it looked like Tom could tell - by the way your shoulders sagged and you let out an exhale of pure relief. Apparently even if you’d managed to convince the hosts you were enjoying the evening, Tom easily saw through the performance. After some hurried goodbyes, Tom led you out of the hall with his hand hovering over your lowerback, trying to make sure your exit was as discreet as possible. 
Away from the bubble of chatter and activity, in the deserted hallway, Tom stopped you - lightly holding both hands on each of your arms. 
“Wheres your team?” 
“Um Luce is back at the hotel, she was trying to see if she could reschedule any of my stuff tomorrow.” You winced at the way he sighed, realising you were all on your own in some random business event hall in Tokyo.
“Harry -my brother- is waiting in the car at the front - is that okay?”
“No Tom, don’t worry abo-“
“Yeh well I am and I think you feel ten times worse than you’re letting on.” He spoke harshly, like a school teacher telling you off - except the hint of a kind smile at the end was a dead giveaway. 
“You sure?” 
With a relieved nod (Tom had thought you might be a bit more stubborn - you obviously were really really ill) he wordlessly shrugged his suit jacket off, wrapping it round your shoulders. He muttered something about not wanting you to catch a chill but to be quite honest you were a bit distracted by the woody cedar smell of Toms aftershave that enveloped your senses. Maybe it wasn’t so bad being fussed on by him? To be fair he wasn’t wrong either, you were in a strapless evening dress - you would’ve preferred to be in joggers, but Marvels press team had other ideas. 
After a quick pit stop at the toilets, the two of you managed to make an unnoticed escape out the building - into a big SUV which had seconds prior pulled up onto the steps. You literally melted into the nearest window seat, body hunching over as you probably crumpled Tom’s jacket beyond belief. 2 seats along from you, a frizzy haired boy gave you a sympathetic smile, which you returned weakly whilst muttering a ‘hi’. Meanwhile, Tom pulled the sliding door shut, sitting across from you. 
“Oh Y/n this is Harry and Harry this is Y/n.” In unison both of you replied with an ‘I know’ eye roll. Your response was somewhat more shocking to both Holland boys, you could tell from the way they had this whole nonverbal conversation with their eyes - they were very clearly brothers. Needing to explain you continued. “I like to keep tabs on my castmates, I’ve seen you on Toms instagram.” That had both boys smirking, Harry presumably just because you knew who he was; Tom more smugly, you’d just given away you slightly stalked him on instagram. 
Silence reigned for a moment, as the driver put his foot down slightly. 
“How you doing?” Tom asked. 
“Mhm…” you thought for a second, how to eloquently describe the sensation. 
“shit.” 
Both boys chuckled a little and even though you had closed your eyes in an attempt to dull the throbbing behind your temples, you could feel the eyes on you. 
“You want the music off?” Harry asked, referring to the indie-rock coming quietly out the speakers of his laptop, which was resting on his lap. With a shake of your head you refused, even if really silence probably would help your head, you were already causing the two Hollands enough trouble - no need to bore them during the journey back into central Tokyo, especially when you weren’t the most enthusiastic company ever. 
Thankfully the music stayed on a low volume, whilst the car seemed to settle into a comfortable silence. With a long exhale you fluttered your eyes open, seeing Tom focused on his phone, before you rested the side of your head against the black-out glass. Taking some relief from the cool glass, you huddled further into the corner of the car against the door.
Floating in the space between sleep and wakefulness, you were kind of aware of your head occasionally bobbing and jerking about - but really didn’t have the energy or willpower to do anything about it. Instead, the thing that perked your attention was hearing some supposed-whispering from inside the body of the car.
“I know she said she didn’t care but she was clearly lying-“ 
“Like you know! You’ve been desperate to try and spend some time with Y/n- maybe you poisoned her just so you could be all knight-in-shini-“
“Turn. The. Music. Off.” Tom sounded scathing now, and with a grumble from your other-side the cheery drum beats ceased.
“Happy now?” …and Harry was sarcastic. 
“Swap places with me.”
“What?”
“Just do it.”
“Why?”
“So she can lie down.” 
“Well no because you would still be in the way if we swapped.”
“Yeh but she can lie on my lap idiot.”
“She can lie on me.”
“She doesn’t know you!”
“Well for 1, barely ten minutes ago she said she did know me. And 2, she doesn’t know you any better!”
If this was their version of whispering, you would love to hear what volume ‘shouting’ was. There was no reply for a short while, you imagined the two brunettes locked in some intense staring match.The next time Tom spoke he sounded more defeated - almost begging. 
“If I admit you beat me at the driving range the other day will you-” 
“I KNEW IT!” Harry yelped, the volume making you jerk, eyes flying open before reflexively closing because the light was too bright. There was a little mutter of an apology, then silence again. 
Once agin you must’ve drifted off because it felt like absolutely no time had passed when a firm but gently hand on your shoulder nudged you awake. 
Sure enough the boys had swapped position, Tom now sitting along the seat from you, Harry looked a little sulky from across the way. It was Tom who was reaching over, a gentle and peaceful smile on his face.
“You wanna lie down? Don’t want you to strain your neck.” He wasn’t wrong, adding to the throbbing headache, the cloudiness in your brain and the unsettled feeling in your stomach… now your neck hurt. Just bloody great. 
Had you been your normal witty and perceptive self, you might’ve teased Tom as to why him and his brother had done a switch - but everything hurt and all you wanted to do was sleep for a hundered years. So with squinting eyes you jerkily nodded, missing how Tom chuckled to himself. The guy undid your seatbelt, then sat back to let you balance the back of your head on his thigh, looking up at the roof of the SUV. Already your eyes were closed again, you kicked off your slip-on heels and bent your legs up to lean against the backrest - occupying the position you had been sat in before hand. You felt his hands reposition the jacket, pulling it round so it was now like a blanket tucked under your chin. 
To be fair it was much more comfortable than sitting up and you weren’t even aware of how quickly you dropped back into sleep. 
Though it wasn’t quick enough to miss Harry’s very sulky sounding comment, presumably meant only for Tom’s ears. 
“Still think you’re being fucking creepy bro.” 
<33 lemme know what u think! (would make me feel less guilty for not doing all the work I rlly should be doing aha)
tagging : @hallecarey1 @crossyourpeter @hollandfanficlove
399 notes · View notes
cupofteaguk · 4 years
Text
on the road (to you)
Tumblr media
summary: as a young adult, one of the strangest revelations is the discovery that peers of yours from past fragile college years are getting married. so imagine your shock and excitement upon receiving a wedding invitation. there are, however, two problems: (1) you are a poor early-20s recently employed adult just beginning to adjust to your 401k plan, and (2) the only available ride to the wedding comes in the form of Jeon Jungkook—friend of a friend, attendee to that aforementioned wedding, and your old college crush. 
pairing: jungkook x fem!reader
genre: roadtrip au, strangers to lovers au | fluff/angst 
warnings: recreational alcoholic consumption, definitely not an accurate representation of how a road trip might actually be, mentions of anxiety + insecurities, very minor book reference to: The Night Circus, equally minor movie references to: Mission Impossible and The Princess Bride because I have a problem, light makeout sessions, talks of DTR (define the relationship), some angst but this is me so there’s a happy ending. 
word count: 27k 
a/n: a birthday present for the one and only Jeon Jungkook, whom I love and respect so much and only wish the bestest of days for. Partly inspired by Taylor Swift’s song “invisible string” +  a love letter of sorts to my own old high school crush for whom my memory of him helped build Jungkook’s character. This also turned out way longer than I ever wanted it to be lol oops! 
update: i was actually able to do a writer’s audio tag on this fic!!! check it out if you want to hear about the behind the scenes process that went into writing this fic <3 
.
When you land a job in the months following your college graduation, you feel as if you are on top of the world. How could you not? After all, the norm that follows post-college is one of disappointment and constant hunts online to find job openings for any position that could suit your background and previous work experiences. It’s a fear that plagues lots of your friends, both those in college and out. It’s the same paranoia you had in the months leading up to graduation and the few months after graduation—in which your days were measured by the boxes you packed to move out of your tiny college apartment and into an equally tiny new apartment you currently share with an old roommate of yours, as well as the days you spent hunched over your computer and scrolling through job postings. 
You had gone through more than a handful of cover letters, resume submissions, and in person interviews before finally landing the job you currently have and have been working under for a month now. 
Throughout the course of the recent month, you’ve continued to secure certain moments that solidify the confidence that you’re finally becoming an adult. Sure, a barely functioning adult who mostly still uses the microwave to heat up your frozen Mac and Cheese—but an adult nonetheless. From learning how to pay your bills online, to realizing that grocery shopping was something you needed to make a conscious effort to do, along with going to and from your nine to five job with your coffee order in hand. 
All of those things have helped you feel like you were, perhaps, finally getting your life together. 
And then you receive the invitation in the mailbox. 
It happens when you unlock your box on a bright March morning, taking out the usual round of bills and fashion magazines until your fingers lock around an envelope bigger than the normal letter size. It’s much sturdier too. 
You don’t know what to think of the letter, until you bring the damn thing back into your apartment and rip the opening. The mere sight of the content inside makes you feel like the hand of life has just taken your figurine and moved you back a good twenty squares. 
The post in your hand reads: 
WITH GREAT JOY, IRENE AND SEOKJIN REQUEST THE HONOR OF YOUR PRESENCE FOR THEIR WEDDING CELEBRATION ON THE DAY OF MAY 25TH. COCKTAILS, DINNER, AND DANCING TO FOLLOW. 
There’s a date at the bottom of the invitation. As you line the date up with your calendar, you realize that you have a week to RSVP to the event. 
You toss the envelope onto the counter in the kitchen just to glare at the cardstock, maybe to convince yourself this is a dream or at least convince yourself that it’s normal for your friend from college to be getting married even when you have yet to land a successful relationship of your own. 
You aren’t as close with Irene as you used to be, but the memory of your friendship is still at the forefront of your mind. The pair of you met during your final year of university, when you were assigned to work together for one of your many senior projects and immediately clicked. The months you spent in her apartment and vice versa pulling out all-nighters in desperate attempts to finish your project definitely earns you an invitation. At the very least, you are happy to see that Irene: bright and smart and funny, is getting married. 
Not only that, but getting married to Seokjin. He’s a year older than you and Irene, but those two met when he was still enrolled and have been inseparable ever since. You don’t know relationships that well, but you know them enough to recognize that Seokjin and Irene were what everyone called the ‘endgame’. In truth, it was only a matter of time before you were to receive one of these from them. 
But did she really have to one-up you like this? Not that it’s a competition. However, it does leave a funny feeling to see someone the same age as you display a much more put together handle on life. You groan at the thought.
“What’s got your panties in a twist?” Karly asks. 
You turn to your roommate. She’s seated at the kitchen table, books out and everywhere as she looks over at you. Karly: fellow alumni, graduated from her undergrad program early to go straight into pursuing her master’s degree. She’s a busy bee. You wave the envelope. “Irene is getting married.” 
Her eyes widen. “Ah shit, no way?” She takes the paper that you offer to her and looks over the invitation. “Damn, I knew it was only a matter of time before we started getting this stuff, but to actually see it happening…” 
You groan. “I know right!” You take the cardstock back from your friend. “It’s only been six months since we graduated, how could she be getting married already?” 
“Well, Irene did have a job lined up for her right after graduation,” Karly points out thoughtfully. She sees the look of bewilderment you give her. “What? It was on her Instagram.” 
You pout. “Of course Irene would have a job lined up like that.” You run a hand through your hair. “I mean, that’s good for her. Really good, actually…” 
Karly jerks her chin towards the envelope still in your hand. “So, are you planning to go?” 
“I don’t know, do you have plans that day?” You wave the paper. “I’m allowed a plus one.” 
Your roommate cracks a smile. “Are you asking me out? A little forward of you, we’ve been friends for so long…” 
You whine, shaking the paper and little more frantically. “Karly, this is important! I don’t want to go alone, I won’t know anyone!” 
She laughs. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry. What was the date again?” 
You provide the date to her. You approach Karly’s place at the kitchen table and watch as she opens the calendar on her laptop. Immediately, you are overwhelmed by all the deadlines she’s got under practicality every date on the screen. Yet, a “wow” is the only thing you can say at the sight. 
Karly smiles, sparing you a glance over her shoulder. “One of the joys of being a grad student slash T.A. slash research assistant.” She scrolls down into May, and narrows her eyes upon May 25th. Underneath the date is an event—color coated to bright orange and typed out in all caps. CONFERENCE WITH PROFESSOR WONG. “Oh crap, I have a conference that day.” 
“No…” You whine some more, trailing off as you grab Karly by the shoulders and begin shaking. “Karly! You’ve left me out for the bears! What am I supposed to do?” 
Karly laughs as she lets herself be manhandled in this way. “I don’t know! Go and deepen your social life or something.” 
You stop shaking her and glare instead. “Is that a joke?” 
“What do you expect me to say?” She retorts, appalled by your answer. “Then don’t go.” 
You whine again. “But this is Irene, and I’ll feel bad for not going and congratulating her!” 
“Then go!” 
“But I don’t have a plus one!” 
Karly places her hands at her temples. “Oh my god, this is like the circle of stupidity with you. Then find a plus one! Or just don’t go!” She whirls around to face you. “I will help you find a dress if you decide to go. I will also sit with you on the couch and eat popcorn with you if you decide not to go.” 
You continue to pout, knowing that you deserve that gentle attempt at a lecture but still not liking the reason why you needed such a talking to. 
“Fine,” You eventually decide to say, sliding into the seat next to Karly and leaning forward to plant your entire upper body on the table. 
Karly laughs at your defeated posture. “Well, you have the rest of the week to make your decision.” 
She has a point. That doesn’t mean you have to like it. 
.
For the rest of the week the decision of whether or not you should attend the wedding becomes a weight in your mind. You spend the next few days pondering it, thinking over the pros and the cons. 
As overdramatic as it is, you think about it during work, when you’re partaking in your home workout routines, and even when you’re about to fall asleep. You do want to go, you really do. It’ll be the first time you attend a wedding that didn’t involve a relative, which feels like a big deal in your adult agenda mindset. And Irene is someone you wouldn’t mind spending an evening with to catch up. 
However, you wouldn’t get to spend the evening with Irene—after all, a wedding implies that she would likely be mingling with all of her guests and you would just be another attendee forced to find other means of entertainment. That’s where the plus one comes in handy. Except you don’t have a plus one. A slight problem. 
You sigh. Work is a little slow today, as you are also experiencing the afternoon slump in which your mind drifts away more often than usual. You find yourself with a small laundry list of tasks (such as emailing companies, working on drafts for releases, and trying to set up different appointments) but without the motivation to do those things right away. Because of that, your afternoon slump takes the form of opening airline services to find information and prices about flying to Irene’s wedding. It’s in her hometown, about a five hour flight time from here to there. 
You click on the various boxes that require information, finally allowing a search. As the search goes through, your eyes take in all the prices—both the amount to get there and to get back—and your lips part slightly at the totaling numbers. 
“Five hundred dollars?” You mutter to yourself. You’re not sure how this would work with budgeting, but you’re still trying to figure out how to balance the cost of AC, the internet, and how to eat appropriate meals at least once a day. You don’t have five hundred dollars to spend on an airplane ticket. A slightly bigger problem. 
You sigh again, resting your elbow on the desk and your chin in the palm as your eyes continue to scroll through the website. 
Behind you, fingers curl around the top of your cubicle. There is a silence between the two of you: him, merely observing, and you, completely oblivious, until he clears his throat. 
You jump, having not expected to be interrupted like this. A squeak leaves the back of your throat as you whirl around to see who is visiting you. “Jimin!” You exclaim, taking in the boy now perched along the wall of your cubicle. This is before you narrow your eyes. “Asshole, you scared me!” 
If you just started working here and learned that you’d be cursing out Park Jimin for startling you, that past version of yourself might have turned red, shocked, and nervous at the thought. A month ago, Jimin was that coworker—as friendly as friendly people come by. With his pretty eyes, perfectly soft pink lips, and freshly dyed brown hair, you had been immediately taken by his charm and helpful nature. 
Then the month went by, and you realized there were no romantic intentions on either end. Jimin then became your first friend in your new job. Albeit, he’s a nosy friend who enjoys asking questions and dragging you out to nearby bars and coming over occasionally with take-out, but a friend nonetheless. 
“Sorry!” Jimin says back, then he glares at you. “What are you doing over here anyways?” 
You shake your head. “What do you mean?” 
“What do you mean what do I mean? You’ve been sighing all afternoon.” Jimin pulls out a slip of paper from behind his back. “Fifty times in the last hour, I swear to god.” 
You straighten out of your seat to get a better look at the paper, unamused to find fifty tally marks across the surface. “You’re lying, there’s no way that I sighed fifty times in an hour.” 
“Of course you wouldn’t know, you’re the one doing all the sighing!” Jimin retorts, lowering his hand with the paper. “Is something up with you? Did something happen?” His eyes flicker to the monitor screen behind you and he frowns. “What the fuck? Are you moving away already?” 
You blink. “What?” 
He jerks his chin towards the computer. “You’re looking at flight prices.” 
“Huh?” You turn around, having completely forgotten about your previous predicament in light of discovering that Jimin counts your sighs. “Oh! No…” 
Jimin raises an eyebrow. “No, you’re not looking at flight prices?” 
You slide back into your chair, a silent invitation for Jimin to step further into your cubicle. You sigh again, and he holds the paper back up. Taking a pencil out of his pocket, he makes another mark. You look over at him upon hearing the pencil scratch and scowl. “Give me that!” You grab the paper from his hand. “I’m dealing with a crisis right now, don’t count my sighs!”
“Alright! Alright!” Jimin slides behind you and leans forward to get a better look at your computer screen. “So where are you moving to this time?” 
You press your lips together. “I’m not moving away. A friend of mine from college is getting married. I’m just trying to see how expensive it would be to fly over there.” 
He whistles at the five hundred dollar price in your cart. “That’s pretty expensive.” 
“I know!” You groan, throwing yourself further back into your chair. “I wouldn’t mind going, but I don’t have a plus one. And as you can see, flying there would be a challenge on my wallet.” 
Jimin hums at that. “Well, regarding your plus one problem, I wouldn’t mind going with you.” 
You turn to look at him. “Really? You’d go across the country and endure an entire evening with your coworker and her old college classmates?” 
He shrugs. “If you’re desperate, I’ll keep my offer around.” He actually pouts this time. “Are you implying that you see me more as a coworker than a friend? After all the times we’ve hung out outside of work!” 
Your eyes widen slightly, having not thought of that. “No, no, Jimin, I mean—yes, I do see you as a friend now but we met as coworkers so I just think of you as a coworker first—!” You’re rambling. 
Jimin interrupts by patting your shoulder, the corner of his lips quirked up into a smile. “I’m just messing with you.” 
You shake your head again. “Asshole,” You grumble, returning your attention back to your computer. 
Jimin is still mid-laughter behind you. “Anyways, yeah, like I said. If you’re desperate to go, I wouldn’t mind going with you. But deciding how to get there is a different question entirely.” 
You turn to glare at your friend for a moment. “I’ll let you know.” 
He nods, before his lips part and he’s snapping his fingers. “Oh yeah! I wanted to ask you something.” 
He backs up, allowing you enough space to turn around fully and face him. “Okay, what’s up?” 
Jimin grins, lifting his leg up to nudge your chair slightly. “I’m going out tonight—you should come with.” 
You don’t even give this a second thought. Your lips turn into a downwards curl as you shake your head. “Nope.” 
Jimin looks appalled. “Why not? Didn’t you have fun the last time we went out?” 
“If ‘fun’ to you is trying to drag your drunk ass home and staying the night to make sure you wouldn’t choke on your vomit…” You grumble, trying not to shudder at the memory. It has only been a few days since that ‘fun’ time. 
“I told you that sometimes I overestimate my abilities, and I already apologized for that,” Jimin points out, although he does have the decency to look guilty for that mess. He perks up again. “But this’ll be different, I promise. I’m meeting up with some friends and we’re just gonna catch up. It’s at one of the quieter bars uptown: no loud DJ, no bright lights, no bottomless rum and coke. Promise. It’ll just be a lot of socializing.” He watches you hesitantly. Socializing has never been your strong suit. “And finger food.” 
The mention of food does make you look up towards him—your first sign of interest towards something. However, another thought weighs you down. “Are you sure you even want me to go?” You ask after a moment. “I mean, this is a catch up with friends. Wouldn’t I be intruding?” 
“Not at all!” Jimin brushes off, waving away your concern with his hand. “I told you, it’s a socializing thing. Besides, my friends are always bringing someone along. They were asking me when I’d have a friend tag along, so I thought you’d be a good selection.” He notices you still frowning. “C’mon! It’ll be fun. When I’m not vomiting over your shoes, I’m good company. And I promise I won’t be vomiting this time.” 
You stare at Jimin for a moment longer, contemplating his words. This is very true. Jimin is an ideal friend to have during social gatherings—he’s good at keeping a conversation going so you don’t have to shoulder the weight alone, he’s good at reading when you’re in a good mood and when you’re ready to go home, and he’s excellent at keeping unwanted attention away. You know this. Jimin knows that you know this. 
It takes one curl of your lips for Jimin to grin, knowing that he has convinced you. “Okay!” He says, finalizing the decision without having to hear the actual answer from you. He pats your knee. “We’ll take the subway after work, it’s just a few stops down.” 
If your mind conjures up any second thoughts, Jimin leaves before you are able to express them. 
.
True to Jimin’s word, the pair of you step into a subway heading westbound as soon as you’re finished with work. It’s much later in the day now, the afternoon sun has changed into a night sky with a chill spring breeze to match. The carts are filled with the evening crowd of adults, all done with another day of work and finding enjoyment for the rest of today by returning home or seeing friends. It’s a rarity that you would fall under that latter category, but the thought makes you excited nonetheless. 
“Alright, so you wanna tell me a little bit about these friends that I’m seeing tonight?” You ask, gripping the handlebar above you but leaning towards Jimin so he can hear what you’re saying over the noise of the subway speeding down the tracks. 
Jimin grins. “They’re just some friends I grew up with. We like to get together once a month to catch up and hang out, since everyone is so busy with their own lives.” 
You smile back. “That’s actually really sweet of you guys, to plan hangouts once a month.” 
He lightly flicks your forehead. “Hey, are you saying I’m normally not very sweet?” 
“Well, not right now!” You protest, hand over your forehead. “That hurt.” 
“You’re being a baby!” Jimin retorts back. 
The pair of you continue to bicker like this until your stop is announced over the intercom. Jimin halts the further insults being thrown at each other as he gestures towards the approaching station, as seen through the window of the subway. 
“This is our stop,” Jimin says to you, allowing you to step out onto the platform first. He joins behind you right after, leading the way as the subway’s three chimes signal the closing of the doors. There’s a breeze that follows, running through your hair and clothes as the subway zooms away to its next stop. The station itself is crowded, filled with groups of friends and individuals carrying on with the rest of their evening, overall looking so lively and you can feel yourself feeding off their energy. 
With a gesture pointing up the stairs that’ll take the pair of you to ground level, Jimin leads the way. You make your way through people, following Jimin’s guide until you’re both exiting the station and entering the world of your new stop. It’s another area of the city you work in, so the change in scenery isn’t too dramatic—but it’s a place more catered towards restaurants, shopping areas, and hang-out sections. The bright neon signs protrude out from the building, flashing the various products or services the specific building offered: from manicure care to corner ramen shops. 
“C’mon, let’s hurry!” Jimin calls back to you, picking his pace up slightly. He’s not running, but his long legs make it harder for you to keep up. “Everyone is already there.” 
The pair of you continue to pace down the sidewalk, past the crowds of people waiting to eat, people lingering outside of clothing stores. Finally, Jimin slows down near a restaurant. He looks over his shoulder to make sure you’re still behind him, before entering the establishment. He mentions something about knowing where their seats are, before continuing deeper into the restaurant. 
As you look around, the place does look like a restaurant slash bar—not as crazy as some of the bars Jimin takes you with the intention of actually getting drunk, but there’s still a bar here and there’s still alcohol being shared heavily. It’s the same demographic of early 20s, young adults with friends, but there are actual tables and chairs and booths set up like a restaurant. So you suppose Jimin hadn’t been lying to you about this. 
“There they are!” Jimin says to you, as you look up and follow Jimin’s finger to the table in the far corner that is completely filled with the exception of two seats. You vaguely make out the back of some heads, most belonging to boys, before your eyes land on one of the boys facing you and Jimin. He’s sitting at the far end of the table, currently laughing brightly at something one of the boys at the table has said. For all intents and purposes, the boy is cute. Extremely cute. When he laughs, his eyes and nose crinkle and his lips spread into a wild smile—and brings out the dimple on his cheek. He looks like the embodiment of all your ideal types mashed into a singular being. 
All of those things. Yet, that is not the reason why you are staring. None of those things come close to why you stop dead in your tracks, why your heart drops in your chest, why your eyes widen. Even with the shitty lighting in this restaurant, you are one hundred percent positive. “Jimin!” You manage to choke out, having enough well power to grab onto his hand seconds before he is able to make himself and yourself known to his friends. 
He whirls around, wide-eyed and curious and worried. “What? Is everything okay?” 
You shake your head. The room feels too small. “I think there’s something I should tell you—!” 
“Hey, is that Jimin? Jimin!” Your voice is very easily drowned out by the sound of another, much louder voice that seems to boom through the restaurant. 
Jimin turns back around in time to face one of the boys from the table who has gotten out of his seat. You are able to see him from over Jimin’s shoulder—a tall boy with messy unkempt hair and a boxy smile. Jimin greets him with a “Taehyung!” before the boys embrace. “Taehyungie,” Jimin continues afterwards, turning around so both are able to face you. “This is Y/N, she’s a coworker of mine.” 
Taehyung grins, a friendly gesture that makes you relax. But only slightly. “Y/N! It’s nice to meet you, I’ve heard a bit about you from Jimin. All good things, I promise.” 
“W-Well, that’s good to hear,” You manage shakily, eyes nervously darting to the boy at the end of the table, who has stopped his conversation and is now looking at you and Jimin. 
“Let me introduce you,” Jimin says, breaking your concentration as he rests a hand on your shoulder. He points right at the boy at the end of the table, who is still staring at you. His eyebrows are furrowed together. You want to bury yourself alive. “That one over there is—!” 
A lightbulb seems to go off in the boy’s head. His face breaks out into a smile as he points at you. “Hey, Y/N!” 
Jimin looks taken aback at the fact you are being recognized by someone at the table. His hand lowers as he looks over at you. 
You, however, cannot focus on Jimin. You can only focus on the boy at the end of the table, the boy currently smiling over at you with all the light in his eyes, the boy who makes the memories flash through your mind. From that, the best you can manage is a tiny smile. “Jungkook!” 
Jungkook. Jeon Jungkook. Where do you even begin with him? 
You met Jungkook during your second year of university. He had been an arts major (you were not) and yet, your paths crossed multiple times throughout the quarter as a result of sharing many general education classes together. You even were forced to pair up on a project for one of those aforementioned G.E. classes. Neither of you ran in the same social circle, but that didn’t change how sweet, funny, charming, endearing, easy-going, friendly, smart, and nice Jungkook was. It was very easy for him to make friends, very easy for him to go out of his way to say hi to you in the library or in class or in the cafeteria, and very easy for him to strike up a basic conversation with you. 
Because of that, it was very easy for you to fall for him—to develop a deep-rooted crush that went on for the rest of your university experience. You would use the term ‘friends’ very loosely when describing what your relationship with Jungkook had been. You had never hung out with him outside the context of school, never went out to eat with him, and never saw him again after graduation. Until now. 
Actually, ‘acquaintances’ would probably be a much more fitting term. 
“Hey, I haven’t seen you since graduation!” Jungkook is saying as he stands up from his chair and approaches you. As if on autopilot, you return the one armed hug he gives you. His smile, while still pleasant, holds a surprising tinge of shyness to it. 
“Woah, hold on a second,” Jimin interrupts, immediately pointing between Jungkook and you. “You guys know each other?” 
“Y/N and I went to university together!” Jungkook provides. 
Jimin looks like his eyes are about to fall out of his sockets. 
“We’ve known each other since second year,” Jungkook continues. He looks over at you. “I didn’t know you know Jimin.” 
“Uh…” You forget how to speak. You’re too busy looking at Jungkook as if you haven’t seen him for years. In a way, it feels like that. Seeing people from college outside of college after a graduation ceremony is like meeting them again for the first time—most of them develop a more independent look. Some look like their life is seconds from falling apart. Some look much happier without the institutional pressure to secure classes and grades and internships. Sadly for you, Jungkook falls under the latter category. Did he always have that twinkle of starlight in his eyes? 
“Y/N and I work together,” Jimin provides, seeming to realize that you weren’t going to answer Jungkook’s question. “She started working about a month ago.” 
“Oh, that’s cool,” Jungkook replies, still looking at you. It is then he seems to notice that the three of you are standing in the middle of the restaurant. Although you are not distracting any patrons, the workers probably don’t appreciate it. “How about we sit down? We’ll be able to catch up more!” 
Jimin seems to regain control of the situation quicker than you do, because he nods at Jungkook. “Let me introduce her to everyone, then we’ll join you.” You look over to where Jungkook had been sitting and immediately notice the previously empty two chairs right across from him—like fate, or something terrible like that. 
So you watch as Jungkook makes his way back to his seat, and Jimin starts to guide you around the table. He only drops a name. Surprisingly, he doesn’t linger, he merely takes you to the next person. It only takes you a second to figure out why. 
“You didn’t tell me you know Jungkook,” Jimin hisses in between the time it takes to travel in between people. 
“I didn’t know you knew Jungkook!” You hiss back. You smile and nod politely at the person Jimin introduces as Yoongi. “Seriously, you never mentioned him once!” 
Jimin only keeps his frustration for a moment before he’s introducing you to someone named Hoseok, a boy with a bright smile, the one who was making Jungkook laugh earlier. “Okay, fine,” He relents, the pair of you finally move to take your seats. “But what was that earlier?” 
“What was what?” 
“You were just staring at him! What, did you have a huge crush on him or something—?” Jimin accuses, but he stops. Just as the pair of you are about to sit down, Jimin parts his lips in realization. “Oh.” Then, he sends you an absolutely wicked grin. “Oh, okay.” 
Your eyes widen at him, murder in your eyes. “Jimin!” 
“So, Y/N,” Jungkook’s voice cuts through your little biting banter with Jimin. 
You whirl around to face Jungkook, eyes completely devoid of murder and voice several pitches higher. “Hi, Jungkook!” 
He smiles, such a wonderful little thing that makes your heart flutter in your chest. “Hi.” 
Jimin ducks his head to hide the fact that he wants nothing more than to burst into fits of laughter. 
“So how have you been?” Jungkook starts up. “I haven’t seen you since graduation. Since you landed a job, you seem to be doing well.” 
“I am!” You manage, only continuing to try and keep a handle on your heart and managing well enough this time. “There were a few months of just scrolling through job postings and writing cover letter after cover letter though.” 
Jungkook laughs, another beautiful gesture that makes you mirror his smile. “I definitely feel that.” 
“Well, what about you? What have you been up to?” You ask. “I think I saw on your Instagram and you were traveling around for a little?” 
His eyes light up at that. “Oh yeah! I don’t know if you remember Kim Mingyu from school?” You do. “Well, he and a friend of his got into some freelancing and had to do some traveling around to work on some filming. He asked me to come along because I actually have some photography experience. So that was a thing I did for a few months.” 
You nod, smiling. “No way! That’s so cool.” 
You do relax after a few conversational exchanges with Jungkook. He’s just as relaxed and mellow, yet friendly and polite as ever, and it’s easy to make conversation with him as it always has been. Eventually, you join in on the larger conversations with the whole table—touching on topics from your university experiences to tales from your new job. A lot of your role, however, falls to listening. Jimin’s friends are rowdy, funny, and out-going. They invite you in like you have been in this group for years—and are able to provide context on older memories they are revisiting. 
Most of your evening, however, is engaging in conversation with Jungkook. Occasionally, Jimin will join in, but he does spend most of his time laughing along to something his other friends are saying. Since you and Jungkook have always been friendly with each other, long conversations aren’t out of the ordinary. You just never considered how well you and Jungkook got along, how easy it would be to transition from topic to topic. 
“I am really glad that Jimin invited you along,” Jungkook explains brightly after the pair of you are done laughing following Jungkook’s tale of another fuck-ups with Kim Mingyu. “Makes you realize how small the world is.” 
“Oh, you should have seen her moping around earlier today,” Jimin interjects, choosing now of all times to insert himself back into your conversation with Jungkook. “She was sighing all afternoon—so maybe we should thank her misery that I decided to invite her along tonight.” 
Jungkook turns to you, a sympathetic look across his face. “Did you have a bad day today?” 
You try for a laugh, waving away Jimin’s words. “Jimin’s just overreacting. Actually, I found out a friend of mine from college is getting married, so I was trying to figure out my plan…” You start, trailing off as you look at Jungkook. “Wait, you didn’t know Irene, did you?” 
“I did.” His eyes widen as his lips part in realization. “Oh my god, you were invited to Irene’s wedding too?” 
“I was!” You exclaim, unsure whether you should be excited or even more nervous at the prospect of potentially seeing Jungkook at the wedding event. “Holy shit, this makes it an even smaller world. How did you know Irene?” 
Jungkook is still mid-giggle at the pure coincidence of everything. “We both knew Mingyu! This is so crazy. Are you planning to go?” 
You shrug. Jimin chooses to interject once more. “That’s what Y/N over here was sighing all afternoon over.” 
You whine as you look at Jimin. “No need to sell me out! Listen, Jungkook.” You turn back to the boy opposite of you, who is still gazing at you. “I’m sure you understand my current predicament.” 
“Sure.” 
“You know how expensive flights can be.” 
“Of course.” 
You fold your arms over each other and rest them on the table. “So, are you planning to go to the wedding?” 
He nods. “Most likely, yeah. I actually knew that the wedding was going to be happening soon, since Mingyu told me about it as soon as Irene got the ring. I ran into the flight problem pretty quickly too, so I decided to just drive to the event.” 
Jimin whistles. “Drive across the country, huh, JK? That must be a four day trip, or something.” 
“It was coming out to be,” Jungkook acknowledges with a nod. “But it’s okay.” He’s grinning, looking excited at the prospect. “I’ve never done a cross country drive before, so it was actually kind of exciting to plan the route. There are a few places I want to stop by and visit. I’m sure it’ll be fun.” Then, Jungkook turns back to you. “If you decide that flying would be too expensive, then you’re more than welcome to come along. It’ll be nice to have some company and not spend four days by myself.” 
Entirely on instinct, you start to laugh. You think he’s joking—how could you not? This is probably one of the longest conversations you’ve ever had with Jungkook. Like you’ve mentioned before, you wouldn’t consider him a friend. Why would he seriously try to invite you on a road trip?  “Yeah, I’m not too sure—I’ve never done a cross country trip before…” 
The conversation shifts pretty quickly as soon as you reply back to Jungkook. Hoseok asks you a question that drags your attention away, simultaneously allowing you to forget about Jungkook’s request. 
The end of the dinner happens soon after, when the bill has been paid and you suspect the long line of people outside waiting for a table are waiting for your party to be done. So venmo exchanges and money debts go around until each member of the table starts standing up one by one to make their move to exit the restaurant. 
You and Jimin are one of the first to leave. Goodbyes are exchanged along with the polite ‘it was nice to meet you’ phrase thrown around. Jungkook is mid-conversation with Yoongi, but he still gives you a quick hug of parting before you and Jimin exit the restaurant. 
The pair of you only make it out a few steps before there is a familiar voice calling your name. “Hey, Y/N! Y/N, wait up!” You stop and turn around, surprised to see Jungkook dashing out of the restaurant. He rests himself for a moment before he’s straightening back up to look at you. 
You try for a smile. “Hey Jungkook, what’s up?” 
He takes in a few more deep breaths to calm himself—either from the dashing he just did or to steel himself for the next question, you don’t know. “It’s about me inviting you to drive up to Irene’s wedding—I just thought I’d let you know it was a serious invitation. Having the company would be nice, and you wouldn’t be a burden to me, seriously. Besides, it’ll be fun to spend some time together.” 
“O-Oh,” You stammer, wringing your hands together. “I’m not too sure… I still have to think about it.” 
“Of course, of course,” Jungkook dismisses good naturedly. “Just thought I’d let you know, so you know that you do have options.” 
Although the offer makes you nervous, you cannot dismiss Jungkook’s thoughtfulness. You give him a more relaxed smile. “I really appreciate that Jungkook, thank you.” 
He smiles at your smile. “No problem! Actually…” He digs around for the wallet in his pocket and produces a little card. “Here’s my business card—my cell phone number is on here so just text or call if you decide to join me. Or,” He presses his lips into a more bashful smile. “You can just text me whenever for whatever reason. I just thought I’d let you know that it was good to see you again.” 
You take the card slowly, unable to look away from Jungkook’s face. He looks so genuine and shy that it doesn’t help your own racing heart. “It was good to see you too, Jungkook…” You return, albeit a little breathlessly. 
He smiles again, dimples pressing in his cheek (and your heart). He turns to Jimin “Oh yeah, nice seeing you too Park.” 
“Hey.” Jimin hits him on the shoulder. “I’m your hyung, you should show me more respect!” 
“My bad, my bad.” Jungkook doesn’t apologize though. His gaze flickers to yours one more time, gaze looking strangely hopeful. “I’ll see you guys around.” He walks backwards a few paces before turning around and returning to the restaurant. Maybe to see his other friends. 
Either way, it doesn’t matter. You are still screaming internally regardless—as shown through your red cheeks, widened eyes, and singing heart. Jimin will certainly never let you live this moment down. 
Now, you are screaming externally. You don’t even give a thought or an explanation. You simply walk into your apartment, nosedive for the couch, and start yelling into one of the throw pillows. 
There’s a rapid movement of footsteps coming from down the hallway almost immediately, one that grows gradually louder until the owner of the steps starts speaking. “Who the fuck is out there? I’ve played softball my entire life and therefore will not hesitate to drive this bat so far up your ass—oh, Y/N.” The voice lowers significantly, as does the threat level it emits into the air. “It’s just you.” 
You lift your face from the throw pillow, and immediately brush away at the hair that falls in your face. “What the fuck!” You croak, pushing yourself into a sitting position and pointing at the bat in Karly’s hands. “What are you doing threatening me with a bat? You’ve never played a game of softball in your life!” 
“Oh, this isn’t mine. It’s Soonyoung’s.” Soonyoung is Karly’s boyfriend from high school, who used to play baseball on the high school team. How Karly has her boyfriend’s baseball bat is a mystery, but it’s something you think you are better off not asking about. She places the bat down on the carpet next to the coffee table. “But I should be asking you the questions, you bitch! You scared the shit out of me!” 
You sigh, throwing your head to rest on the back of the couch. “Sorry, sorry. Had a crazy day.” 
Karly ponders this as she moves to take a seat next to you. “You seemed fine when you texted me about you getting drinks with Jimin. Did something happen during the dinner?” 
You straighten up again and grip Karly by the arm. “Okay, don’t scream.” 
“You mean like you did?” Karly retorts dryly. 
You shake her. “I’m serious!” When Karly doesn’t say anything, you take it as a sign to continue with your story. “I saw Jungkook.” 
Karly blinks, then grabs your arm right back. “Wait, Jeon Jungkook, as in the guy you’ve been crushing on since second year?” 
“Yes!” You whine, throwing yourself onto the couch all over again. 
“The one you had to work together on a project with and nearly cried even though you guys just had to submit a paper?” 
“Yes!” 
“The one who said hi to you in the library that one time and you tried to put your elbow on the table afterwards but you missed and hit your head instead?” 
You pause, scowling. “Okay, now you’re just being mean. Are you done?” 
Karly is laughing. “Oh my god. What are the chances of you seeing him now?” 
“There’s more,” You groan out. 
“Really? Honestly that yell could have been just for seeing him again and that would have made sense—!” 
You ignore her. “He’s friends with Jimin. He’s friends with Irene, too. He was invited to her wedding.” 
“Wait, Jimin is friends with Irene or Jungkook is friends with Irene—?” 
“He won’t pay for the flight though. It’s too expensive. I can attest to that.” 
Karly holds a finger up, trying to connect the dots. “When did you look up flight prices—?” 
“So he invited me on a cross country road trip to Irene’s wedding.” 
Karly frowns. 
You sigh. “Jungkook invited me on a cross country road trip to Irene’s wedding.” 
“Oh! Oh!” Karly’s eyes widen. “Oh my god, that’s huge. Are you gonna go?” 
“I don’t know!” You whine. “Jungkook mentioned it would be a four day drive to get there. I don’t know if I can survive four days in a car with him! We’ve never been that close, what if it gets awkward?” 
Karly ponders this. “I really don’t think it’s in Jungkook’s nature to be awkward with someone—especially someone he’s had a history with.” She sees the look of disbelief you give her. “Well, even if that history was really limited. What makes you think it’ll be awkward? Was it awful seeing him tonight?” 
“No!” You cry, straightening into a sitting position so your legs drape over the side of the couch. You force yourself to calm down. “It… it was pretty good actually.” 
Karly raises an eyebrow, amusement dancing in her eyes. “Really now.” 
“Yeah…” You reply, trailing off. “We sat across from each other during the dinner and we talked most of the night, surprisingly. I guess because we were sort of acquaintances we’ve always known about each other, so it wasn’t like we didn’t know how to ask questions to each other. And Jungkook… he’s easy to talk to as he’s always been and he’s so nice and positive and he has a dimple on his cheek when he smiles…” You finish slowly, noticing your racing heart that has come up as a result of this conversation and of your memory. You realize the predicament you’re in, further emphasized by Karly’s growing grin. You groan. “Shut up.” 
Karly looks like a Cheshire cat. “I didn’t say anything.” 
You grab onto one of the throw pillows and properly hit her in the face. “You’re saying many things right now, you bitch!” 
Karly takes the pillow from you and proceeds to whack you in the shoulder. “Not outloud!” 
“So you admit it!” You accuse, pointing at her. 
Karly yells. “Just admit you still have a crush on him!” 
Your groan turns into a cry. “Don’t say it outloud! Now I have to deal with it!” 
Your roommate sighs. “Bitch, I can tell you exactly how to deal with this. You’re gonna go on this road trip with Jungkook and see if you guys vibe—you honestly will not find a better way to discover your compatibility with him. If it works out, then you get more than a plus one to the wedding. If it doesn’t work out, just skip the wedding and take the first flight back home. Cut off your friendship with Jimin while you’re at it—it’s the only way to ensure you’ll never have to run into Jungkook again.” 
You pout. “That seems a little dramatic.” 
Karly thinks for a second, then she nudges you. “Remind me again about that quote your high school English teacher used to always parade around.” 
You stare at her for a moment, because you know exactly what point she’s trying to make. Still, you decide to humor her. And yourself. “‘You’ll never know if you’ll sink, swim, or float, until you’re willing to take the plunge’.” You level Karly with another gaze. Your friend has a point. You missed any chance to hang out with Jungkook during your college years—partly because your friend groups never intersected, but mostly because of your internalized fear of fucking up. But now that you are just a little older and just a little more versed in the art of conversing and befriending—maybe Karly is right. Maybe this is your chance to see if a different set of timing could make a difference. 
So you sigh. 
“I guess I should text Jungkook, huh.” 
Karly pats you on the shoulder. “Take the plunge, my dude.” 
.
You do take the plunge. You take Jungkook’s business card out from the pocket of your dress and dial the number. He expresses excitement—and also relief. 
These things lead up to the current moment. Eight o’clock in the morning: you lingering in the kitchen with a cup of coffee, your suitcase by the door, and a roommate keeping you company. 
You don’t realize how nervous you are until you get a text from Jungkook. 
Jungkook (8:03am): i’m here! u can buzz me up so i can help u with your stuff :) 
You (8:03am): it’s ok jungkook it’s just a suitcase. i’ll be down in a second! 
You pocket your phone, and Karly can read the expression across your face before you realize what is going on. She straightens up. “He’s here?” 
“Yeah.” You rinse your coffee cup and make your way towards the door. “Did you want to come down with me?” 
Karly stops and gives you a look. “I thought that was already implied.” 
“Well, thanks, that’s really nice—!” 
“Someone has to give you an embarrassing goodbye.” 
“There it is.” You sigh. You don’t say anything as you and Karly exit the apartment and make your way down the hall into the elevator. It only takes a few seconds for the elevator to lower down to the ground floor, where you and Karly exit and make your way to the front of the apartment complex. 
You swear your heart beats just a little faster as soon as you see Jungkook near the front entrance of the building. He’s wearing a pair of black jackets with an oversized denim jacket and currently looking down at his phone—overall appearing so tall and pretty and otherworldly. For a brief second, you are taken by the fact that for the next four days, he’ll be yours. 
Jungkook looks up as soon as he hears the door opening and he smiles. “Hey you.” 
You smile, albeit a little lopsided and dreamy. “Hi.” 
Jungkook walks towards you immediately. “Here, let me help you with that.” He reaches a hand out and gently takes the handle of your suitcase before you can say anything. Just as he’s taking the suitcase from you, Karly emerges from the building. “Oh, sorry about that.” 
Karly waves him off. “Don’t be. I’m Y/N’s roommate—I’m just here to see her off.” 
Jungkook stares at her for a moment, then he snaps his fingers. “Wait, I remember you. You went to college with us too.” He jerks his chin towards you. “You hung out with Y/N a lot, right?” 
“Yeah, I’m Karly.” She holds out her hand for Jungkook to shake. “And you’re right, she and I hung out a lot. We were roommates back then too.” 
Jungkook nods in understanding, before shoving his hand into his pocket. His other hand is still holding onto your suitcase. “Well, I promise to take good care of Y/N.” 
Karly smacks her teeth against the side of her mouth as she points at him. “You’re a good man, Jungkook.” She pauses for a moment, seeming to contemplate a new thought. You recognize the look immediately, and your fingers twitch as if you want to strangle her. Or at least let her know you’re throwing her a look of murderous intent. But of course, Karly doesn’t see it. And even if she had, you doubt she’d care. “But no funny business, alright.” 
You gape at her. “Karly!” 
Jungkook coughs at that. “I-It’s just a drive—y-you don’t need to worry about that.” He does, however, turn away to hide the red that dusts his cheeks. 
As soon as Jungkook’s back is facing you, you whirl around to shoot Karly with a glare. “Karly, you’re lucky I’m leaving for the next four days or I would not hesitate to figure out how to make stuffocation look like an accident!” You hiss out between teeth without taking a breath. 
Karly glares right back. “You’re really dumb, aren’t you? The fact that he recognizes me because he saw you hanging out with me on campus doesn’t strike any chords? Even though, like you said, you guys weren’t really friends?” 
You blink. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” 
Karly widens her eyes. “What the fuck do you mean? Are you dumb with all the boys or just Jungkook?” 
“What do you mean!” You snap back. 
“So, Y/N, ready to go?” 
You whirl back around to find Jungkook now standing in front of you and Karly. He must have finished packing your suitcase in the trunk of his car and is now looking over at you with a tilt in his head. 
So you force a smile. “Of course,” You say, turning to Karly. “I was just saying bye to my roommate.” 
He nods in understanding, sparing one more glance at Karly before seeming to decide against it because he looks away. He’s still a little red at Karly’s previous comment. “We should get going then.” 
“Sure.” You look over at your roommate. “See you, bitch.” 
Karly waves back, grinning wildly. You just know she has several other thoughts she’d like to share with you, but has probably deemed you embarrassed enough. Lucky for you, she keeps her mouth shut. 
Unlucky for you, without Karly to be a barrier of distraction, this leaves you alone with Jungkook. You slide into the passenger seat of his car, still not yet processing the weight of what you’ve just agreed to. You fiddle alone for a second before Jungkook is opening the driver’s side and shifting into his seat. 
There is a silence as Jungkook is starting the car, and a part of you wants to die. Or at least have the ground swallow you whole. Holy fuck, what did you just sign up for? 
Your mind somehow takes five seconds to turn into complete shambles that you almost miss Jungkook’s question. 
“Here, I’m giving you an important mission,” Jungkook says, rummaging through the various chords that lay over the center console before producing an aux cord. “Should you choose to accept.” 
He’s got on such a serious expression you momentarily forget about your anxiety. His usage of the iconic line from Mission Impossible makes you laugh—a breathy sort of noise that escapes when your mind is too full. You still take the aux cord. “Oh my god—ever heard of bluetooth?” 
He pouts. “It hasn’t even been five minutes and you’re already insulting my beautiful Celia!” 
You raise both your eyebrows. “Celia?” 
“Yeah, that’s the name of my car.” He catches the bewildered look you give him before angling himself back to face the steering wheel, where he shifts his console into drive and makes a turn onto the main street. “If you’re already weirded out by the fact I have a name for my baby, then you’re in for a very long four days, Miss. Y/N.” 
You giggle, feeling that distraction of nerves start to come off your shoulders. “Not weird at all.” You pause. “Ryan is the name of my car.” 
“Ah!” He holds one arm out in a grand gesture. “You see, not so strange after all.” He steals a glance at you, watching as you’re about to connect your phone to the aux cord. “Wait!” He says, pointing a finger at you. 
You look up at him, wide eyes. 
He’s still holding an arm up. “How’s your music taste?” 
You’re still giving him your surprised expression. “You scared me!” 
He laughs, returning his hand back to the steering wheel. “Sorry, sorry. I have to ask though—I’d rather know now than later, so I can kick you out and not feel as bad about it.” 
Your laughter seems to melt away the last of your nervous energy. “Nice to know you’re putting all your cards out now.” You look down at your phone. “Regarding my music taste… it’s whatever you want dude! I have some lo-fi on here, some pop, alternative, Broadway, anime openings… an ‘everything’ playlist. Honestly, the world is your oyster.” 
“How about we start with your ‘everything’ playlist,” Jungkook suggests. “That way I can judge you immediately.” 
“Were you always this charming, Jeon Jungkook?” You retort. “Or has graduation changed you?” 
“Oh, I’ve always been this charming—you just never noticed.” 
That comment, however, goes over your head as you focus down on your playlist. You look over, selecting the shuffle option as Taylor Swift’s soft music from her newest album fills the air. Another silence fills the car, but it’s much more peaceful and comfortable. You allow yourself to settle further into the passenger seat of Jungkook’s car. 
“So,” You start after a moment. Jungkook hums to let you know he’s paying attention. “What inspired the name Celia?” 
Jungkook brightens at the question. “She was this character from a book I read when I was younger. The Night Circus? Anyways, the book is about these two illusionists who try to one up each other with their skills of magic, but they end up falling in love. Celia is the name of one of those illusionists.” 
You grin. “Sounds like a very cute crush.” 
Jungkook grins back. 
The drive out of the city continues like this. The pair of you cover the topic of books, of music, of your favorite animes. Jungkook just has this magical power of ensuring the tension dissipates from your mind and stays gone—whether it’s through his relaxed nature or easy-going teasing or his ability to ease the conversation from one topic to the next. It feels like every conversation you and Jungkook had in college, whether vague or circling around classes, all have led up to this moment. It seems like everytime you or Jungkook run out of things to talk about pertaining to a certain topic, you would bring up memories from college and just continue from there. Everything feels natural. 
It continues to feel natural even as you and Jungkook slowly start to see the edges of the city landscape fade away. The high rises fade into shorter buildings and smaller business areas that surround the bustling city scene. You watch as those buildings and business areas become rows of houses. Residential areas in the suburbs, passing by the occasional school or corner restaurants. 
“Before we enter the wide unknown,” Jungkook starts up, breaking the quiet that has enveloped the car. “You want to pick up lunch? You hungry?” 
You haven’t even realized how much time has gone by until you look at the clock on Jungkook’s dashboard and notice that it’s past noon. You widen your eyes at the sight. “Wow, I didn’t even realize so much time had passed.” 
“Yeah, we drove through a few cities. Time flies when you’re having fun, huh?” 
“You wish,” You tease, sticking your tongue out. “So, what, do we stop at a Cheesecake factory or something?” 
Jungkook blinks. “I thought you were poor—why would we stop at the Cheesecake factory? And why is that the first restaurant that comes to your mind?” 
You wave your hands. “It was just a suggestion!” 
“Well, I’m realizing that I should probably let you know that the motel I picked for us to drive to tonight is pretty far out—Google Maps says we probably won’t get there until midnight, and that’s with us driving straight through.” 
“Midnight? Fuck, Jungkook. Will we make it to the wedding a day early or something?” 
“Ha, ha, no. I’ll go over the schedule I planned out tomorrow. Basically, I want to try and cover most of our ground on the first day so we can take the rest of the trip easy. But I thought I’d let you know now that sitting in a restaurant probably won’t be the most time responsible idea.” 
“That’s true.” You look out the window again and see the golden arches of McDonalds appear within your line of sight. “Let’s just stop at McDonalds.” 
Jungkook follows your gaze. “Alright, down. Let’s do it.” 
He exits off the freeway, following down a route that takes him almost immediately towards the McDonalds parking lot. Since this restaurant is still within the lines of the city, it’s not completely deserted. There are a few cars in the parking lot, even fewer cars in the drive-through line. Because of this, ordering the food only takes a few minutes. Both of you get chicken nuggets, sodas, and large orders of french fries. 
“You know, we’re really living like kings,” You comment as Jungkook drives out and makes his way back onto the freeway. “College graduates, both somehow able to secure a job, and still ordering chicken mcnuggets.” 
Jungkook shrugs. “I wasn’t told this is what adulthood would be like. But I’m not complaining. My 10-year-old self is singing in so much joy right now.” He says this as he’s stuffing a handful of fries into your mouth. You laugh, and hand him a napkin. 
You turn the music back on. The pair of you silently munch on your chicken nuggets, as you angle your head towards the side window once again. As Jungkook drives, the numbers of structural spaces become more scattered the longer you both continue down the freeway. 
The anime opening to Haikyuu starts playing when you turn back to Jungkook and realize that he’s trying to close the box of his chicken nuggets. You move right away, taking the cardboard from him and closing it yourself. “Let me know if you need anything, Jungkook. Think of me as your co-pilot.” 
He laughs gently. “Is that the rule of the passenger seat?” 
You shrug, putting the empty box into the McDonalds bag near your feet. “For me at least. Everytime I do one of these drives with family, the person in the passenger seat has to open the snacks, make conversation, and always stay awake with the driver. It’s just courtesy.”
Jungkook is smiling softly now, mostly to himself, but it lights the corners of his eyes that makes you momentarily unable to look away. “You wanna tell me about your family?” 
So you do. Your voice becomes softer as you continue, but Jungkook listens to every single word you say. 
True to his observation, it’s not long before the pair of you are surrounded by the wide unknown. Houses in the suburbs become farmhouses and farms. Conversations fade from your family to another comfortable silence as you continue gazing out the window. Jungkook requests your lo-fi playlist at some point, filling the car with the soft and distorted hums. It allows your mind to wander as you stare out the window. The empty stretches of land around you are filled with greenery, with mountains, cutting right through the perfect blue of the sky above you. 
By 4:00PM, your entire body is starting to feel the ache of having been seated for long hours on end. You feel the tightness in the muscles of your thigh, the bones in your knees. 
Jungkook must be feeling the same, because as soon as a sign for a rest stop comes on, he exits the freeway and pulls into a large parking lot. There’s a restroom on the side, but the area is surrounded by trees with mountains standing in the background. 
Jungkook stops the car. “We should get out for a bit to move our legs.” 
You’re already tugging on the latch that’ll open the car door. “I’m already feeling it in my knees.” You open the door and immediately extend your legs out onto the solid ground beneath you. You let out a sigh of satisfaction, and Jungkook laughs from next to you. 
He’s opening his own car door soon after, but he straightens up into a standing position pretty quickly and stretches upwards. He closes the car door behind him, watching as you eventually pull yourself together to do the same. 
You turn to face Jungkook. “I’m gonna use the restroom.” You gesture towards the building and earn a nod from Jungkook, who mentions something about doing the same thing. You meet back at the car a few minutes later. 
Jungkook gestures to the trees surrounding the parking lot. “Want to take a walk around the area? Keep the blood flowing to our legs.” 
You nod. “That sounds like a good idea.” 
“Why don’t you get started. I’ll catch up.” Jungkook watches you leave, before opening the trunk of his car and rummaging around. 
He does catch up with you, quickly enough that you hardly notice that he had sent you out first. You hear his footsteps, and the call of your name. You turn around. “Jungkook!” 
The sight before you makes you waver slightly, as bouts of shyness overtake you. Standing before you is Jungkook, with his camera in hand. The lens is pointed right at you. As soon as you’re staring straight into the camera, Jungkook grins. “Say hi!” 
You whine, whirling back around and covering your face. “Are you filming me right now?” 
“I’m a photographer at heart, what did you expect?” Jungkook teases back. “Besides, it’s really pretty around here. You think I won’t film it?” 
You snort, starting your walk around the parking lot. “Oh yeah, because there aren’t any parking lots and trees and bathroom stops at home.” 
Jungkook is quiet for a second. “That’s not what I meant.” 
You turn to stare right into the lens of his camera. “Then the mountains, right?” 
He’s quiet for another second. “Sure.” He does, however, sound a little disappointed. You do not notice this. 
The pair of you stay quiet as you make your round around the parking lot, taking in the mountains from different angles. The walk around is mostly just to rid of the sensation of your legs falling off, but it’s still a nice view to admire. As soon as you finish a complete round, you and Jungkook return back to the car. You watch as he carefully places his camera into his camera bag before you’re both back in your seats. 
Jungkook turns to you. “Ready to get going again?” He looks at the control panel behind his steering wheel. “We’ll probably have to stop for gas in a few hours. But after that, it’s straight to the hotel.” 
You settle back into the passenger seat. “I guess we already have our dinner plans then.” You’re referring to the gas station. 
Jungkook grins. “I’m down for that.” 
And so, the trip continues back on the freeway. With the lo-fi playing in the background, you watch as the sun tears through the blue sky, as the sun finally begins it’s dip to the other side. The singular color once spread across the pane of atmosphere now conjugates around the sun crawling behind the mountain—creating a diffusion of new colors. The corner of the mountain emits an explosion of oranges, pinks, and purples. 
You lift your head from the window, eyes taking in the rainbow of pastels around the now fading sun. “Wow, Jungkook, look at that sunset.” 
He snorts. “You wanna talk about things that you can’t see back in the city?” 
You pout. “But it looks so pretty, see!” You keep gesturing towards the sunset. 
Jungkook relents just enough to spare a glance in the direction. He hums. “Yeah, it’s pretty.” He looks back at the road. “Can’t really find a view like that in the city.” 
You spend a little more time admiring the sunset than Jungkook does, for obvious reasons. You’ve seen a sunset plenty of times before in the past, but the context of this whole situation makes you unable to look away from it. You’re really out here, stuck in a car with someone you have never hung out with for longer than a few minutes. But you are enjoying yourself. There's peace in that. 
So you watch until the sun dips below the mountain, momentarily leaving the sky in a navy color. 
The next time Jungkook speaks, the area around you is much darker, and the sky is nearly black. “You hungry now?” 
You lift your head from the seat, not even realizing you were drifting off. You’re thinking about Irene, wondering if you should have texted her directly congratulating her on the wedding rather than just simply sending in the RSVP. “Sure. We eat as the car eats, right?” 
Jungkook smiles, a gesture you can barely make out from the headlines. “Of course.” 
This goes on for a few more miles until the sign for a gas station comes up. A few other cars linger near the dispensers. Jungkook parks near his choice and gets out of the car. You follow behind him. He’s already sliding his credit card into the machine, and the sight makes you reach over to grab his wrist. 
“I should pay, you’ve been driving all day!” 
He shakes his head, waving you off. “We’ll take turns, okay?” He looks at you. “Buy me dinner tonight too, that sound fair?” 
You pout, leaning back as you cross your arms. “Not really, but I guess I’ll have to accept it.” 
He grins. “You are correct.” 
As soon as the gas pump alerts you of the filled tank, Jungkook returns the pump back to the machine and locks his car. Together, the two of you make your way towards the convenience store, where the bell above rings to alert the workers of your presence. Nods are exchanged as you and Jungkook tear through the aisles to find anything that could satisfy your cravings. You return back with family size bags of hot cheetos and beef jerky, while Jungkook holds his selection of roasted seaweed and Doritos. You select your drinks together before returning to the cashier. 
It’s nearing 9:00PM as you and Jungkook return back to his car, where you slide back into your seats and immediately tear into your bags of salt and sodium. 
“How are you doing?” You ask as Jungkook finishes his first bag of roasted seaweed. 
Jungkook pulls out his phone, scrolling through the final stretch needed to reach the hotel. “Yeah, about four more hours to the motel.” He looks over at you. “I’m good. The salt in this seaweed really helps. How are you doing?” 
You nod immediately. “Great. Perfect.” 
He smiles, shifting his console to drive and pulling out of the gas station. “I’m used to these weird hours. Remember how I told you I traveled around a bit with Mingyu and Wonwoo? There was this one day we only slept for an hour or something? It sucked, I think I almost passed out that day. But yeah, this is honestly not even that bad.” He turns to look at you. “I think the good company helps, too.” 
You roll your eyes, grinning. “You flatter me, Jeon.” 
Slowly, 8PM turns into 10PM. One glance at Google maps tells you that you’re still two hours from the hotel. Even though you’re not the one driving, and although you haven’t endured any physical activity that could result in this exhaustion, you still find yourself growing tired. Something about sitting under the sun, sitting in a vehicle that rocks side to side with a consistent hum—it makes your mind work slowly and therefore brings out the sleepiness quicker. 
You settle deeper into your seat. 
Jungkook giggles from next to you. “You tired already?” 
You pout slowly, eyes closed just enough. “I’m not a morning person and you made me wake up at 8!” 
“Sure, sure, of course.” 
There’s a pause. 
You ponder a question for a moment. It’s something that you would never dare ask Jungkook if you had been more awake and more alert. But you’re tired, and your defenses are lowered, and it means you are more prone to asking questions. “Hey, Jungkook? Did you have any girlfriends when we were in college?” 
Jungkook doesn’t answer immediately. “Where’s this coming from?” He asks instead. 
You shrug, making a dismissive noise as your shoulders rise up. “Curiosity.” 
A pause. “I went on a few dates, but I never had a serious relationship.” 
“No way.” You lift your head up from the seat. “But I remember seeing you hang out with the occasional girl in the quad, or at some restaurants around the school.” 
Jungkook smiles. It’s hard to read the look in his eyes. They’re focused on the road in front of him, but they seem almost hazy and faraway. “Like I said, I went on a few dates. I did really want to get into a long term relationship in college. A lot of my friends had them, that’s where my parents met, so I was really open to the idea of at least experimenting. There were a lot of girls that I thought were nice, easy-going, or just really pretty, so I tried my hand in the whole dating thing.” 
“And it didn’t work out?” You coax out gently. 
“Not really,” He continues. He steals a glance at you. “We’d go on a few dates, but none of them ever felt substantial. I think girls see me and have a certain expectation—an expectation I couldn’t meet. So I never could picture myself in a long term relationship with any of them.” 
You tilt your head towards him. “There must have been someone…” 
“Well… there was one girl.” Jungkook starts after a moment. He’s not looking at you this time. “We had a few classes together earlier—we weren’t in the same major program. I don’t even know if I’d say we were close or anything. We just had a few classes and saw each other around on occasion. But the conversations we did have during class or outside of class just felt more real. Honestly, I could have been totally wrong about her. I could have just been blinded by all these expectations I was putting on her, which is ironic. But she was the only person I could actually see myself being in a long term relationship with. Or at least try.” 
You hum, still facing towards him in your seat. “Why didn’t you try anything then? You’re a good guy, Jungkook. I’m sure she would have wanted to try with you too.” 
“I guess I was just afraid of pushing it and scaring her off. I thought it was better to stay friends with her than try to pursue something. She never gave me an indication that she felt the same.” 
“And how do you feel now?” 
There’s a pause this time. “I don’t know honestly. We remained friends up until graduation but, uh, never saw her again. I do wonder from time to time how she’s doing.” 
“You should reach out to her,” You advise softly. “Since you guys were friends before, I’m sure asking her out just to catch up won’t seem so weird.” You grin at him. “You need to make your move.” 
It is then that Jungkook turns to look at you. He looks for a little longer this time, eyes focused entirely on you. Underneath the small crescent of the moon above, you are still able to make out his facial features. His cheeks, his nose, his eyes—the latter is glimmering, like he knows something that you don’t. 
“I’m working on that,” He mumbles softly. You turn your head back towards the road. 
You wake up the next morning feeling groggy, dirty, and messy. Your head lifts up from a pillow you can only vaguely remember falling on, laying on top of a bed you only vaguely remember throwing yourself in. There’s sunlight pouring into the room, but it feels like early morning sun. There’s a crisp in the air that you can feel, that you see out of the window. Right outside is the gathering of bushes and trees, a bright blue sky.
You are in the motel. 
Slowly, you push yourself into a sitting position, until you’re resting atop the white linen of your bed. Across the room, snuggled in his own twin bed, is Jungkook. His lashes are fanning across his cheekbones, his lips are parted, and his breathing is slow and soft.
It isn’t until Jungkook shifts in bed that you realize you’ve been watching him like a creep. Hastily, you tear your gaze away and decide to focus your gaze down. You notice immediately that you are not underneath the blankets. Instead, you are lying underneath Jungkook’s jacket. 
You roll the jacket off your frame, discovering that you are still in last night’s clothes—which explains why you were feeling so groggy and discombobulated. You look across the floor of the hotel room. Your suitcase is near the foot of your bed, and your phone sits on your nightstand connected to your charger. 
Vaguely, you recall what had happened the previous night—how Jungkook drove into the hotel room nearing midnight and the exhaustion was so overpowering that you and Jungkook blindly asked for any room with two twin beds before following through and practically collapsing into your respected beds. 
You definitely did that, which explains why you were on top of the bed, why you’re still in yesterday’s clothes, and why Jungkook’s jacket was your blanket. Stealing another glance at Jungkook: underneath the blankets and in a different t-shirt—you can assume that he was able to take a shower before lying down. 
With a sigh, you push off Jungkook’s jacket and lay it down on the bed next to you. Hoping not to disturb Jungkook, you slide out of bed and lower your suitcase to the ground. After fishing out a new set of clothes, you decide to take a shower. 
The warmth from the shower is the best breath of fresh air you’ve gotten since hitting the road with Jungkook. It feels like your body is going through a battery recharge, and it’s one you take your time with. You step out of the shower, running the towel through your hair and drying yourself enough to slip on your outfit for the day. The towel is thrown around your neck as you step out of the shower, letting the steam follow you out of the bathroom. 
Jungkook is still sleeping as you step out, which is good otherwise you’d feel bad for having disturbed his sleep time. After all the driving he did yesterday, you figure he deserves a few extra hours regardless of what the schedule calls for. 
You continue running the towel through your hair as you pick up your phone. Strangely, you do not remember connecting it to a charger before knocking out, but you pick it up regardless to see the 9:00AM time across your screen. 
There’s a quiet that takes over, in which you’re sitting perched comfortably on your bed and scrolling through your phone as Jungkook continues to drift a few feet away from you. 
About thirty minutes seem to pass before Jungkook is moaning softly to himself, letting out a puff of air as he slowly opens his eyes. His arms extend above him, knocking into the headboard and making him curse softly to himself. His eyes open as he lowers his hands to inspect the damage before immediately looking over towards you. 
He blinks, a tired smile overtaking his lips as he arches his back into a stretch. “Hey,” He greets, voice rough and scratchy and making your heart clench. Damn thing. “You’re awake. You knocked out pretty quickly as soon as we got the room.” 
You laugh. “Yeah, I honestly figured that.” You pick up his jacket, as if he hadn’t been the one to lay it on you those hours ago. “Thanks for trying to help me get comfortable.” You gesture towards the nightstand. “Did you find my charger too?” 
Jungkook sits up as he continues a small round of stretches and yawns. “I did,” He says. “You were barely coherent, but made enough sense to tell me where it was in your bag. Sorry for going through it, by the way.” 
You shake your head, waving him off. “No worries. Thank you again, Jungkook.” 
The pair of you stare at each other for a few moments, before that silence is broken by Jungkook’s phone going off. You look down as Jungkook snatches his own phone off the nightstand. He scrolls through something, before placing it back. 
“So, what’s the plan for today?” You ask, bringing your fingers through your hair to comb and give you a distraction. 
“Oh! Right.” Jungkook swings his legs off the side of the bed. “We have a slower day today. The hotel I picked is only about five hours away? We’re driving through the mountains today, so there’s this place I want to visit that has a little restaurant and everything. It’ll be a cute pit stop.” 
You nod. “Awesome, okay.” You curl your fingers around the strands of now loose strands of hair. 
It takes another hour until you and Jungkook are packed up again and ready to leave. A quick stop to the lobby provides both of you with a bagel and cup of coffee each as your breakfast. All before you’re once again sliding into the passenger seat of Jungkook’s car. 
You roll your shoulders before clicking your seatbelt in. “Ready for another long day?” 
“Of course.” He digs through his center console, producing his aux cord. “Your mission,” He says dramatically, not unlike yesterday. “Should you choose to accept.” 
You laugh gently, taking the cord. “You in love with Mission Impossible or something? This is the second time in two days you’re quoting it to me.” 
And this is how your day starts off—talks of Mission Impossible films that bleed into conversations about movies. 
The day at 10 o’clock in the morning is bright and blue as Jungkook drives back onto the freeway and continues down the road. The first few hours consist of the surrounding flatland, of green grass and high mountains all around. Conversations between you and Jungkook are a little more scattered today, but there’s a new level of comfort about the situation. With both of you well rested, it invites a more relaxed atmosphere as you pass the occasional joke or story time between the pair of you. 
As the sun continues to travel higher in the sky, Jungkook’s car starts it’s approach up the mountain. The trees start enveloping the pair of you into a newer, higher world. Not only that, but whenever you and Jungkook reach a clearing, it exposes a dip of lakes, grass, and mountains. And you, always having enjoyed the views of nature, keep an open eye for every single thing. 
You see Jungkook’s choice of destination before he does, and you gasp excitedly. 
Up ahead is a cloud of pink, white, and red flowers covering an entire mountain side. There is an occasional pop of cedar trees amongst the covering of pink, white, and red, but the colors are so poignant that it captures your attention immediately. 
You point to it. “Is that where we’re going?” 
Jungkook grins. “Surprise!” He’s selected this spot before offering the invitation to let you come along, but you’re not complaining. You’ve never been to a flower farm before, despite having heard about them and seen pictures of them for most of your childhood. You continue to watch with wide eyes and bright smiles as Jungkook drives closer and closer to the destination, finally parking in the appropriate lot after paying the fee. 
You’re practically vibrating in your seat with excitement. “Jungkook, Jungkook, c’mon let’s go, let’s go!” You push on the latch and nearly tumble out onto the ground. You straighten to stand on your feet, before meeting Jungkook near the trunk of his car. Surprise, surprise, he pulls out his camera and loops the strap over his head. 
He’s grinning as he closes the trunk. “You’re a little excited, aren’t you?” 
“A little?” You echo, clapping your hands, seemingly unable to wipe the grin off your face. “Jungkook, this is a flower farm! It’s so exciting!” 
So you dart off with Jungkook following closely behind you. The parking lot is located at the top of the flower farm, so the tour around the fields is a downwards one towards the bottom. A small pathway maps out a route for you to follow as you take in the various lines of flowers and colors. One short glimpse at the brochure tells you that these are spring flowers, and that you and Jungkook are visiting during the perfect season. You and Jungkook continue through your makeshift tour in silence, taking in the flowers as well as the view that extends out far beyond your line of sight while Jungkook snaps photographs behind you. Words don’t need to be said when everything around you says it all. 
At the bottom of the field is a cafe, a small brick building with an outdoor seating area facing the now upward flower display. You and Jungkook order sandwiches and soda, and take your seats outside as you wait for your number to be called. There are a fair amount of people today at the field, most of which you can see ahead roaming through the flowers ahead. 
“Have you ever been to a flower farm before?” Jungkook asks, as he glances over at you to see how bright your expression is. 
You smile as you turn to him. “No, never. But thank you for bringing me here, it’s beautiful here.” 
Jungkook smiles, looking a little smug. He looks proud of himself. “I’ve always wanted to come here, so I’m glad I was able to bring you along.” It looks like he wants to say more, but the number that rests between Jungkook’s fingers is called out, interrupting the conversation. He returns a moment later with the food. “I actually wanted to ask you something,” He says, taking the sandwich plate off the tray and placing it in front of you. 
You take the napkins that are being offered to you. “What’s up?” 
He settles down into his seat. “I didn’t get to return the question that you asked me last night.” 
It takes you a second to realize what he’s referring to. Immediately, you feel yourself turn red as you press your lips together. You were definitely drowsy last night, and hadn’t put too much consideration in the aftermath of asking Jungkook about his college relationships. You instead try for a laugh, as you wave him off. “Well, you don’t need to ask me. It’s pretty boring.” 
“Nonsense,” Jungkook brushes off, taking another bite of his sandwich. “So tell me, did you get into any relationships in college?” 
You laugh, albeit a little nervously. “No, not really. I never even went on any dates before—I guess, like you, I just couldn’t see myself in any long term relationship with anyone that seemed to like me.” 
“Well, how about crushes on your end? Did you like anyone?” 
You gaze over at Jungkook—taking in his wide curious eyes, his soft voice, his contagious laugh. The memories of him waving at you in class, of him catching up to you afterwards to continue previous conversations, of him going out of his way to say hi to you in the library. Jungkook has always been thoughtful, considerate, and soft along the edges. How could you not have crushed on him during college? 
And how could you not continue to have these lingering feelings for him afterwards? 
You think about your own advice you had given to Jungkook. You should reach out to her. Since you guys were friends before, I’m sure asking her out just to catch up won’t seem so weird. You need to make your move. Could you even follow your own advice? 
You look down before Jungkook could start asking questions about your staring. “There was this one guy,” You start, trying for an uneasy laugh. “But I don’t think he ever noticed me. Well, that’s a lie. I guess we were kind of friends? I think it’s more along the lines of me being out of his league.” 
“That’s depressing,” Jungkook notes as he finishes his sandwich. You hardly even noticed him inhaling the thing. “How could you be out of a guy’s league? You’re so smart and funny and easy to talk to—if anything, a guy would probably be out of your league.” He leans forward, bringing you close enough where you can clearly make out the mole underneath his lip. “Tell me about this punk. So I can tell you he’s not good enough for you.” 
You laugh, keeping your gaze on him. You doubt he’d be so confident had he known about ‘this punk’. “He isn’t a punk,” You remark quietly. “He’s really nice, and really sweet. I was pretty quiet in college. Definitely introverted and kept to myself and had a hard time making friends. Although I would have honestly barely considered him a friend, he just made me feel like my time was meaningful and my attention was valuable to him.” Jungkook’s eyes continue to bore into yours. “If anything, I just wish he knew how much I admire him.” 
Jungkook’s gaze is unwavering across your face, once again displaying that unreadable expression. Yet, despite that, something glimmers in his eyes and he seems to come to an understanding you yourself don’t know about. That glimmer keeps swimming across the orbs, even as he switches his gaze between your eyes. They flicker down to your lips for a second, and your heart stutters in your chest. 
Jungkook coughs, pulling away from you as he seems to hyper-focus his attention on the soda still in front of him. He looks shy as he steals another glance at you from across the table. “He might not have made you feel that important if you were too scared to tell him how you felt.” 
You look down at your sandwich and take another bite. Something about the way he’s staring holes into the side of your face tells you that he knows something that you don’t. You wonder what he’s thinking. 
Jungkook wears that thoughtful expression for the rest of the visit to the flower field, as the pair of you return back to his car and slide back in your seats. He stays quiet as you resume the trip, slowly making your way back onto the freeway and towards your second motel. 
This kind of quiet is different than the previous silences the pair of you have grown to share over the past twenty-four hours. Unlike the comfortable moments of unspoken words, this is more tense. Like he knows something that you don’t. 
You don’t know what to say, or how to break that silence. You don’t know if perhaps you said something you shouldn’t have, or said something to make him uncomfortable. All of those thoughts are not pleasant ones. 
Jungkook stays quiet for most of the drive through the mountain. The music you have selected is loud enough that seems to drown the tense atmosphere, but the questions still press themselves deeply into your mind. What is he thinking about? 
And worse of all: did he know you were talking about him? 
You and Jungkook only speak a handful of times during the trip. He asks you if you need to use the restroom, if you’re hungry, and if you could play him your favorite anime openings. The pair of you have a handful of laughs about your mutual love for Haikyuu and Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, but most of the drive to the motel is ridden out in silence. 
The pair of you reach the hotel around dinnertime, definitely nowhere as exhausted as you had been the previous night, but just as eager to finally reach your destination. The tension between you and Jungkook has eased slightly, so you can only assume that perhaps he has overcome whatever was bothering him. You yourself have pushed the thought of Jungkook knowing the truth out of your mind. After all, if he had known, you assume he would have brought it up. Or at least called for an Uber to send you home. You assume you would have provided some sort of reaction for the two of you to talk about. But alas, those thoughts follow a conversation that has not happened, and will probably never happen, because you’re sure that you’ll never have to be in a situation that forces your feelings to go out of control once again—! 
“Hi,” Jungkook returns to the hotel clerk behind the desk, a girl to be about your age, who is flickering her gaze between you and Jungkook. A flicker in her eyes tells you that she already has multiple thoughts and assumptions about your relationship. “Do you have a room with two beds?” 
“Oh!” The girl blinks, momentarily looking taken aback. “Of course, let me check.” She turns her attention to the computer screen in front of her. Her eyebrows furrow together. “I’m sorry sir, we only have rooms with one bed available—either a full, queen, or king-size mattress.” 
Jungkook makes a noise in the back of his throat as he taps his credit card on the desk. Just watching from the side, you notice how he swallows, how he looks down, how his cheeks turn red. He turns to you after a moment. “D-Do you, uh, do you mind?” 
It takes you a second to realize what Jungkook is asking. He’s asking if you’d be okay with sharing a bed with him. Him: your college crush, the guy you never really lost feelings for. 
You turn red too. “U-Um…” You press your lips together and swallow. “S-Sure,” You manage, waving your hands out in front of you. “I-I don’t mind. I-If you don’t mind, of course.” 
“I-I don’t mind either.” Jungkook, however, looks like he’s about to combust. He looks a little lost again. He blinks once, twice, and seems to realize that he’s supposed to hand the woman behind the desk his card. “Uh, whichever room is the cheapest.” 
“That’ll be the room with the full-size bed.” She flickers her gaze between the two of you. “If that’s okay.” 
“O-Of course,” He stammers back, allowing the girl to take the card. He looks at you. “Do you mind staying here? I have to go to the bathroom real quick.” 
“S-Sure, go ahead.” A part of you wants to hit your head on the desk. What is happening to you? Why is the mere thought of sharing a bed with Jungkook turning you into a pile of mush? You’re a grown ass woman—! 
“So the two of you on vacation or something?” The woman behind the desk asks. She’s still in the middle of scanning Jungkook’s credit card. 
You try for a smile. “Kind of, we’re going to a friend’s wedding.” 
“I see, that sounds fun.” She smiles. “You know, I have to be honest, I was a little surprised he asked for two beds. You guys would make a cute couple.” 
At the label, you start to turn red. “O-Oh n-no, we’re not a couple at all. That’s very flattering, b-but yeah we’re not together.” 
“Oh, I know,” The girl rebuffs. Her smile looks more like a grin. She places Jungkook’s credit card on the desk, along with a receipt and a pen. “I hope the full size bed will change that.” She gives you a wink. 
You part your lips, unsure what to make of the situation. “What—!” 
“I’m back,” Jungkook says, sliding up from behind you and making you jump slightly. “What did I miss?” 
“Uh…” You wonder if your face is too red or not. It certainly feels that way. “Here!” You push him forward towards the desk. “She scanned your credit card. You just need to sign and we’ll be on our way.” 
If Jungkook notices the stiffness in your posture, he doesn’t comment as he leans forward to sign the receipt. Just over Jungkook’s shoulder is the worker, looking at you with a now shit-eating grin across her lips. Several questions ping through your mind, but you don’t get to ask any of those because Jungkook is turning around with his credit card in hand. 
“Uh, ready to get going?” 
“Sure!” You say, voice a few several pitches higher and you return to wanting the ground to swallow you whole. Jungkook leads the way out of the lobby, and you dare one last glance back towards the woman behind the counter. 
She’s waving a slip of paper in her hand. 
You turn back to Jungkook. “Hey Jungkook, give me a second. I think we forgot to grab something at the desk.” 
It sort of feels like a walk of shame to reach the worker behind the counter, who is still grinning at the sight of you and your internal struggles. She hands you the slip of paper, mouths something that makes you go red, before you’re turning back towards Jungkook. “Good luck,” She had whispered. 
Before you’re reaching Jungkook, you open the paper. At the very top is the WiFi password. 
Underneath the WiFi password, in what you can only assume is her handwriting, is one sentence. Fate said you guys only get one bed- don’t worry, I think he likes you too :-) 
“What was that about?” Jungkook asks. 
You shove the paper into your pocket. “The WiFi password,” You supply. 
The walk to the hotel room is quiet as Jungkook leads the way through the different hallways, corridors, and numbers on plaques. That tense silence is back as he guides the two of you, stopping only when he reaches the number that matches the one on the index card. He gives you a look, and inserts the card key into the slot. The door beeps, and he pushes open the door to find, true to the word of the lady behind the counter, one full-sized bed in the middle of the room. 
For the first few hours, it’s easy to ignore that full-sized elephant in the room. Jungkook takes out his laptop and you guys watch your favorite season of Haikyuu together—it’s season two—or you guys linger about on your phones. It isn’t until nighttime falls into your bones, into your minds, that you realize that you really need to address the new situation. 
“I’m gonna take a shower first, if that’s okay,” You say, already sliding off the bed to gather your belongings from your suitcase. Jungkook is humming along to the Haikyuu ending song, but he stops long enough to accept you taking the first shower. He watches you as you fish pajamas out from your suitcase. “Hey, Jungkook…” You start. “Are you sure you’re cool with this?” You gesture to the bed. “I can sleep on the floor. They give you extra bedding for a reason…” 
“What? No, of course not, I’m not letting you sleep on the floor.” He moves until his knees are pressed into the mattress. “And I’m cool with this. Promise.” He hesitates. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?” 
“Y-Yeah,” You manage, straightening into a standing position with your clothes in hand. “I don’t really move around when I’m sleeping. And I trust you, Jungkook.” You keep your gaze on each other until you break it first, turning around to step into the bathroom. 
You step out many minutes later, hair freshly washed and feeling much more relaxed than before. Jungkook has moved to the desk in the corner of the hotel room, typing away at some emails on his laptops. He does, however, whirl around upon hearing you exit the bathroom. The sight of you in your sweats, t-shirt, and damp hair makes his eyes linger. 
You merely tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “You can go now,” You say quietly. 
Jungkook nods. “Thanks.” 
Breaking that eye contact again, you turn to the bed and lift the blankets to slide under the covers. You rest your head on the pillow, and immediately start to drift away. 
You are brought back after what only feels like a few minutes, when you hear a light switch turn off followed by the blanket next to you lifting up. You turn slightly towards the other side of the bed. “Jungkook?” You whisper. 
A stillness. “Ah shit, I’m sorry. I was trying to be sneaky.” 
“Mmm…” You mumble softly, turning your body 180 degrees in order to face him. You can vaguely make out the shadow of Jungkook’s outline. “Don’t worry. I’m a really light sleeper. Come on in.” 
There is a shift in the blankets until you feel the additional weight of Jungkook’s figure crawling in next to you. The knowledge that Jungkook is lying right next to you turns your blood hot both with anxiety and because Jungkook brings in a new wave of heat underneath the covers. For a cool spring night, it’s comforting. But also further anxiety-inducing. 
Jungkook shifts and even though the pair of you are on opposite sides of the bed, you can still feel the warmth radiating off his body. In the silence of the hotel room, you can hear Jungkook breathing. 
“Is this okay?” It’s Jungkook asking. His voice is quiet, soothing, and very close to your face. You realize that you guys are facing each other. 
Still, you have to give an answer. “Y-Yeah,” You reply softly. “Goodnight, Jungkook.” 
“Goodnight.” 
You turn onto your back. You try to go to sleep, you really do. But your heart is pounding, and rather than the blood filling your ears, it’s the sound of Jungkook’s breathing. 
“Y/N, you still awake?” Jungkook asks softly. 
You snort. “It’s only been a minute.” 
Jungkook smiles. “Sorry. I just… I have a question. A thought, actually.” 
“What is it?” 
“Well, okay, I don’t want to come off as arrogant or self-centered, but it’s just a question and just this thought that I have…” 
“Jungkook.” You turn back to face him. “You can ask me the question. I don’t mind.” 
“Well, alright.” Jungkook shifts. He’s a little closer now, you can make out the outline of his face. Everything looks slightly more defined now, definitely a result of your eyes adjusting to the darkness. “When you were talking about the guy you had a crush on… you know, when I asked if there was someone you were interested in while we were in college.” 
“Oh, I remember.” Your heart feels fuzzy, even though you have no idea what he’s going to ask you. 
“Okay, um. I guess I just wanted to know. Were you talking about me? 
The world seems to stop tilting on its axis—and all the consequences of that follow along. Everything around you slows to a grind: your heart stops in your chest, and all the air drains out of your lungs. You hold your breath, feeling as if your body has just been dipped underwater. Thousands of thoughts ping through your mind. You feel like that episode of Spongebob where all the file cabinets in your brain are catching aflame. You suddenly feel like you have no thoughts, but too many thoughts at the same time. 
Above all, one question rises above all the rest: how did Jungkook know? 
You’re so wrapped up in your thoughts that you don’t hear your name being called. It isn’t until you feel a hand at your shoulder do you jolt. “H-Huh?” 
“S-Sorry.” Jungkook sounds a lot more nervous now. “You weren’t responding.” 
“I… I was thinking,” You reply lamely. 
A pause. “What’s your answer?” Were you talking about me?
You swallow. Should you tell the truth? Or should you deny everything with the hopes that Jungkook will forget this conversation ever existed? 
The words spill out before you can think of a proper answer. “What if I was?” 
Jungkook is quiet for a moment. “Well…” He starts up again, inching forward towards you. Every move he makes is amplified in your ear, every squeak of the mattress and every rustle of clothing echoed in the small space that is your hotel room. “I’d be kinda frustrated, to be honest. Because when I was talking about my own crush, it might have been about you.” 
At Jungkook’s confession, the world seems to come crashing down on you as everything around tries to catch up to you. Immediately, you assume that perhaps you hadn’t heard Jungkook correctly, or maybe you’re completely misinterpreting what he’s trying to say to you. 
In a perfect world, maybe you’d say something witty and smart. Maybe you’d play along until he snapped. Maybe you’d be fluent in courting talk and understand exactly what he’s trying to say to you. 
But this isn’t a perfect world, and you are neither witty nor smart. You most certainly are not aware of flirtations. You need boys to be as straightforward as possible. Which is why you utter the most comprehensible: “What?” 
You feel a warmth at your hip—Jungkook’s hand against your skin. “Ahhhh.” Jungkook starts, not at all sounding fearful but rather casual. Still the underlying case of shyness, however, because this is still Jungkook. “I forgot you sometimes need simple things spelled out for you. Remember when you emailed our Arts History professor three times because you kept forgetting what font she wanted the assignment in?” 
You flush—Arts History was the class you and Jungkook were forced to pair up together for. Maybe you would have protested it more had you known Jungkook would turn out to be a little shit over it. “That was a one time thing! You’ve been bringing it up for as long as I’ve known you!” 
Jungkook giggles, pulling you closer so your face is against his collarbone and his chin rests on your shoulder. “Shh, okay, okay, I’m sorry.” 
Your face is burning at the feeling of your bodies so close together, your fingers pressed against his shirt and your nose against his skin. He smells like floral fabric softener. “Jungkook…?” You whisper softly, breath fanning his neck. 
Jungkook tilts his head to rest gently against your temple. He stays quiet for a moment, absorbing the moment. “If you did have a crush on me in college, it would be frustrating. Because I had a crush on you too.” 
This time it’s straightforward, just like how you���ve always wanted it. Why can’t you seem to reply? 
“Oh.” 
“I know.” 
You curl your fingers around Jungkook’s shirt. “What if…” You start slowly. “What if I said I still had those feelings?” 
Jungkook seems to think about his answer. “I’d say that I do too.” 
You swallow, nodding in a way that allows him to feel the movement. “Okay then.” 
Without a warning, Jungkook moves to curl his whole arm around your frame. This brings you even closer together. He noses your hairline. “Go to sleep,” He whispers softly. “We can talk about this tomorrow.” 
A part of you wants to say no—that holding off on confessions isn’t what happens in novels or tv shows or movies. But the larger part of you knows that you won’t be able to have a proper discussion like this when you are weak, tired, and vulnerable. Your heart stalls at his consideration, allowing yourself to be content just like this: asleep, cuddling with Jeon Jungkook as you’ve imagined since you first developed your crush. 
It’s much better than the fantasy. 
.
You wake up the next morning with Jungkook’s arms wrapped around you, his soft breathing against your neck and his lips dusting the skin of your neck. There’s a new kind of comfort you find being held like this, and a part of you wants to melt back into his arms. You think you can pretend to be asleep just to stay here a little longer, but the urgency you have to pee and get the day started becomes too pressing. 
Your previous assumptions of Jungkook being a heavy sleeper are confirmed as you manage to untangle yourself from him without so much as a whine from his end. By the time you finish with the bathroom, Jungkook is just beginning to push himself into a sitting position. 
You linger near the foot of the bed. “Good morning,” You greet, almost nervously. For good reason to—the memory of last night is vague but defined well enough where you aren’t sure what the next course of action should be. It’s not like your college ever offered a course about what to do when your crush admits to liking you back. 
Jungkook looks at you from across the bed. He gives you a small smile, a reassuring one. “Morning,” He says back. “How did you sleep last night?” 
You twist your hands together. “Pretty good, actually. How about you?” 
“Me too.” He adjusts his position so he can crawl over to you. He slides his legs over the side of the bed right next to you. He brings his hands towards you, palms up. Although he’s close enough to reach you, he doesn’t. Instead, he asks: “Can I?” 
You don’t say anything, you merely rest your hand in his. He tugs you towards him, stopping only when you’re standing between his legs. He still keeps his fingers curled around yours, turning your hand up to play with your fingers. 
He looks up at you, a soft smile across his lips. “Hi.” 
You smile back. “Hi.” 
He laces your fingers together, resting them between your bodies. “I guess now for the bigger question… how are you feeling?” 
You look down at your hands, deciding you like the way his larger hands cover yours. “H-How did you know I was talking about you?” You ask instead, looking over at him. 
Jungkook shifts his gaze away for a moment. “I don’t know,” He admits earnestly. “You were just looking at me back at the flower field and I had a feeling. And I really think a part of me was hoping you were talking about me.” 
Unable to help yourself, you feel the side of your mouth quirk up into a small smile. “What would you have done if I wasn’t talking about you?” 
He exhales in a laugh. “Honestly, I might have just driven out in the middle of the night and gone over a bridge or something.” 
You laugh, trying to diffuse your smile by pressing your lips but it only works so well. “I was really surprised to hear you liked me back.” 
“Of course!” He exclaims, looking momentarily shocked that you would feel this way. “I wasn’t messing around when I said you were smart, funny, and easy to talk to. That’s what made me really like you when we first met. Whenever we talked you just felt so real and approachable—like I could just be myself around you. And even now, seeing you after graduating and realizing you’re still all of those things. It just makes me like you more.” 
You feel your heart thumping wildly in your chest. You’ve never thought of yourself in the way Jungkook is describing you—you always just assumed that you were in the background, that you’d never be enough. 
Jungkook is looking at you, his eyes big and wide and full of truth. “Is that weird?” He asks. 
You shake your head immediately. “No, no it’s not weird at all.” You shrug a shoulder, giving him a meek smile. “It’s really sweet, actually.” 
Jungkook grins at that, heaving out a breath as a sign of his lowered defenses. “I think you’re sweet too.” 
You groan at that, throwing your head back as Jungkook breaks into a series of giggles. “You’re corny.” 
“You’re not complaining,” He points out. This is true. 
You shrug. “I guess that means I’m expecting us to catch up on three years of terrible flirting.” 
The smile slides off his face. “You’re right.” He brings your joined hands closer together until your whole body is standing closer to his. “Can I ask to kiss you?” 
The four letter K word makes your heart stutter in your chest once more. Your hands are so close to his chest that you can feel his own heart beating, and the thought of Jungkook being equally nervous for this gives you enough confidence to return his question. “Why don’t you ask and find out?” 
He smiles, a bunny smile that crinkles his eyes. “Touche. Can I kiss you?” 
You smile back. “Yes…” You whisper, leaning down just enough for Jungkook to crane his neck up in order to meet each other halfway. It’s just a closed-mouth kiss, a soft weight against your lips.
It’s one that Jungkook pulls away from before you can really enjoy it, really ponder asking for more. “Sorry,” He says immediately, pointing to his mouth. “Morning breath.” 
The pair of you stare at each other for a moment, before bursting out into laughter. That tense atmosphere is gone, replaced inside with that previously casual and comfortable air—as you step away from Jungkook and let him get his morning started. Except this time, the air is filled with open lingering stares, shy smiles, and Jungkook taking your suitcase wordlessly as you exit your hotel room. 
By the time you load into your car, it’s nearing noon and the gas tank in Jungkook’s car is almost empty. The pair of you agree in another champion’s breakfast—gas station food. 
“I swear, we’re both going to have terrible breakout tomorrow during the wedding,” You point out. Despite your words, you still tear into your Nacho Cheese Doritos with the aggression of a gorilla. “I’m going to photograph horribly. Irene will be so embarrassed.” 
“You photograph horribly? Inconceivable!” He says the word just as it is said in The Princess Bride, which makes you burst into another fit of laughter. 
The afternoon pans out the same way it has for the past two days. Jungkook drives onto the freeway, you decide the music, and the conversations fade in and out. Neither of you talk about the events of the previous night or of what happened in the morning—but the way Jungkook reaches out to laces your fingers together is more than enough. 
The town Jungkook has selected to stop for the evening is a five hour drive from the wedding venue—and it’s an actual city space this time, with restaurants and grocery stores and apartments. As soon as Jungkook tells you this information, you are bursting with excitement. It’s been two days since the pair of you actually stopped and lingered in a city environment and you miss it. 
It takes another whole day of driving to reach the city destination, as the first alert you get is the increasing number of cars that have joined you on the freeway. These more busy freeways guide you into the city, where you are greeted with the first sight of buildings, sidewalks, restaurants, and parking lots in days. 
Even though most of these landmarks are simple flashes that you and Jungkook pass through on the way to the hotel he has selected, you keep your eyes glued out of the window in order to take in as much of the surrounding area as you can. You continue to watch as the immediate high rises become more sporadic and spread out, until he’s finally pulling into the hotel. The sun is just setting behind the many buildings along the horizon. Lots of other cars are parked in the parking lot. You can hear other cars, buses, and trunks driving around the background—and you feel strangely comforted by this discovery. 
“Are you okay with sharing another bed today?” Jungkook asks as he guides the pair of you into the lobby. “I may or may not have called to make a reservation earlier when you were in the bathroom.” 
You laugh, feeling giddy at the thought of Jungkook taking the initiative to continue progressing your now slow-growing relationship. “Was that all they had left?” You ask teasingly as you make your way to the counter. 
Jungkook smiles down at you. “Perhaps I didn’t ask…” 
Your lips part. “Jungkook!” 
“What?” He’s laughing now. “I think I’m gonna bow out of any excuse to cuddle with you now that you’ve given me a taste of what that’s like?” 
You’re gasping in the midst of your laughter. “You’re terrible,” You manage. 
So Jungkook checks in—true to his word, he has reserved a single full-sized bed for the room. 
“Hey, so, I was thinking,” He starts as he’s following the map provided to him by the employee with directions about getting to his appropriate room. This hotel is slightly bigger than the off-the-road ones you and Jungkook pulled into, so it takes a little longer to find the room. After a few minutes of turning the map over, you two eventually find the room. 
“What’s up?” You ask as you push open the door and roll your suitcase into the space, with Jungkook following closely behind you. 
“Come here,” Jungkook requests gently, watching as you let go of your suitcase and make your way towards him. You move into his space easily, allowing him to hold you by the waist. “Since we’ve both admitted to missing out on three years of courting, flirting, and dating—I think we should go out to an actual restaurant to have an actual date.” 
You lean back slightly and give him a slightly shocked look. “Really?” 
“Yes!” He says. “Besides, someone has to put their foot down and say that eating only McDonalds and gas station hot dogs is not the right way to go.”
You laugh at that. “True, but we were having so much fun!” 
“Nope!” He exclaims, shaking his head. “The foot is going down, we’re going to an actual restaurant for dinner. Get changed, take a shower, whatever you need to do to freshen up.” There’s a finality in his words as he finally steps away from you, the smile of sweetness still on his lips. 
The restaurant Jungkook picks after scrolling through Yelp and other lists of recommendations is a corner Italian place that apparently serves the best Linguini and clams—a dish that you really enjoy. So you put something together much more presentable than your usual round of sweatpants and baggy t-shirts—replacing the sweatpants with black jeans and giving yourself a cream colored cropped sweater. It makes Jungkook’s eyes widen all the same. He’s clad in his usual black jeans and oversized coat that is perfect for the spring breeze. 
Since the restaurant is within walking distance of the hotel, you and Jungkook agree to chill off on the driving just enough to stretch your legs and actually have a walk for once—all while celebrating the final night of the road trip. 
“I was a little worried about this at first, to be honest with you,” You admit softly to Jungkook, long after the pair of you have been seated in a corner booth and have ordered your food. You’re circling the pasta noodles around your fork, and Jungkook is watching with a touch of amusement and adoration in his eyes. 
“Not gonna lie, so was I,” Jungkook returns back with an equally meek smile. 
You gape at him. “You invited me though!” 
“I did!” Jungkook exclaims with a laugh, looking down at his own order of food. “Me inviting you was honestly a spur of the moment thing. Me catching up to you, however, was me trying to be brave.” 
“You seemed pretty brave throughout most the trip,” You point out 
Jungkook shakes his head, situating his arms in a cross motion. “Nah dude that was just all a very well thought out facade. A part of me was expecting it to go terribly so I could at least walk away knowing that I built you up in my mind and the fantasy of that was better than the reality.” He must see the look of uncertainty casting a shadow over your mind because he immediately cuts back in. “Just so you know, the reality is much better than anything I could have conjured up.” 
You lower your chin slightly, staring over at Jungkook. You bring one shoulder up into a half-hearted shrug, maybe to showcase a certain level of carelessness. “What were you conjuring up then?” 
“Oh, I don’t know if you want to go there right now,” He rebuffs, looking a little red in the cheeks. “I think we should start slow. Refer to the PG thoughts, if you will.” 
You laugh, focusing your gaze momentarily on the last of your pasta. You had sorted through the clams, since they weren’t your favorite things to eat. “Jungkook, are you admitting to me that you have thoughts above PG?” 
“Oh shit, that wasn’t my intention!” 
You giggle. “I’m messing with you, Jungkook!” 
He pouts. “Don’t do that.” He rests his hand on the table, palm up, inviting for you to take it. “I just want to spend today with you, and take it slow—I just want to hold your hand and kiss you and lay with you and just be with you in the way I couldn’t be with you in college. Is that too weird?” 
You look down, pressing your lips together, trying not to squeal and definitely not trying to throw yourself off the chair. You look back over at him and squeeze his hand. ��That’s not too weird at all. That’s actually really sweet. Honestly, those are things I probably would have asked for regardless. I don’t really know the rules of dating—I never really went out that often.” 
Jungkook smiles sweetly back at you, he brings your hands up to kiss the back. “I’ll give you a few pointers then, let’s get going.” 
After the check is paid for—it ends up being a split between the two, it’s the best compromise you can come up with considering he wants to take you out but you want to pay him back for driving this far—the pair of you emerge back into the city space. Jungkook’s hand is still wrapped around yours, using that connection point to pull you close to him. 
“Now this move,” Jungkook explains, beginning to lead you both back to your hotel room. “Is when the gentleman walks the lady home, because their date went by smoothly and he wants to see her for as long as possible.” 
You laugh. “I’m enjoying this so far.” 
The pair of you continue down the sidewalk, using the time it’ll take to walk back to the hotel to walk off the food in your stomach. You resume your conversation, giggling and laughing all the same until you’re walking through the lobby of the hotel and slowly making your way to your hotel room. 
Right before you step inside, Jungkook stops you. “Normally, the front door is where the gentleman drops the lady off, and they talk about how well the date went.” 
“Oh, well, in that case, this was so nice, Jungkook,” You remark, beaming at Jungkook’s own smile. “I’m glad you convinced me to eat real food for once.” 
“You’re welcome—I had fun too.” Jungkook slides closer to you. You, completely hypnotized by his next movements, watch as he cups your face with his hand to angle you upwards. “This is the part where we have a first kiss, because the stars are lined up for this. And because I really want to.” 
You smile, curling one of your hands around the wrist near your face. “Seeing as we’ve already had our first kiss, how about a second one?” 
Jungkook smiles back, eyes lidded towards your mouth. “I guess that’ll work.” His lesson on dating, it seems, is done, as he leans in to kiss you. You suck in a breath as he covers your lips with his. It’s deeper than the first time he kissed you—which had been more of a peck with a side of morning breath. But now you’re both awake, tasting like wine, and drunk off each other. It’s a more real kiss. 
You whimper as Jungkook’s tongue runs over your bottom lip, before slipping into your mouth. It’s a sensation you can get completely lost in, until Jungkook pulls away. 
Under the hallway light, you can make out his flushed cheeks, his wet lips, his dark gaze. 
Immediately, Jungkook is pulling you to his side before he starts digging through the pockets of his jeans. “Alright, we’re going inside right now.” 
You lean into his shoulder. “I thought I was supposed to invite you inside, Jeon? What happened to giving me pointers on first dates?” 
“Screw that,” He retorts, practically shoving the hotel door open. He turns around to face you. “Now, this is our hotel room. And I want to kiss you in private.” 
Your laughter is drowned out as Jungkook tugs you by the wrist into the room. 
.
Under different circumstances, waking up next to each other after a first date would hit you with a wave of anxiety and maybe even a vague sense of embarrassment at letting someone you like see you in such a vulnerable position. 
Right now, however, under the morning sunlight within the covers of your shared hotel bed, you just feel happy and content. You wake up on your side, with an arm resting over Jungkook’s chest and his fingers curling around your own. There is an immediate feeling of giddiness that overtakes you, because it’s hard for you to believe that this is happening. Someone you’ve liked and continue to like actually returning your feelings? That has always been such a foreign concept to you. 
You don’t know how long you continue laying in bed until Jungkook starts shifting next to you, signalling his wake. You watch as his eyes slowly peel open, laced with grogginess but still looking unfairly attractive that there are butterflies in your stomach. 
Jungkook lets out a sigh, as he looks down at you. A tired smile takes over his expression. “Morning.” 
“Good morning,” You reply back, voice soft and a little shy. “Happy wedding day.” 
That is true. Today is Irene’s wedding—an event you and Jungkook will arrive at in nearly five hours. There’s a strange sort of knot that is beginning to twist itself in your stomach, a knowledge that something good is coming to a close but a fear in the unknown as to what this would mean regarding your relationship with Jungkook. Neither of you have laid down groundwork for your relationship—if this even is a relationship to begin with. You may be inexperienced with this kind of stuff, but you’re sure that one date and making out on a hotel bed doesn’t immediately constitute an exclusive relationship. 
If Jungkook notices the tension in your form, he doesn’t say anything. He kisses your temple and grumbles something about wanting to get the day started. He mentions something about not having to worry about getting dressed for the wedding straightaway—that he has reserved a room at the hotel some of the guests of the wedding would be staying at, which is where you will be getting ready before the event. You nod, hearing pieces of his words, but a lot of it gets lost in your own thoughts. 
Is it okay to ask questions about where you stand with Jungkook? Is it foolish of you to even bother wondering? You’ve seen movies and have had conversations with friends about guys who dismissed questions like that as ‘moving too fast’. You don’t want to scare Jungkook off, but you also need to know that you’re not wasting your time.
You remain in bed, staring up at the ceiling as you sigh and try to organize through your thoughts. You also try to break down how the past three days have been. 
However, trying to do so proves to be a difficult challenge, as Jungkook’s phone starts buzzing excessively on his side of the nightstand—it seems like he is getting a series of text messages from someone. 
You know you shouldn’t be looking or prying, but the constant binging of alerts only eats at your nerves more. You turn in the bed towards Jungkook’s side, picking up the device to search for the silence switch along the sides. The screen, however, lights up and you immediately see a name you have not seen or heard since college. 
Jennie (9:53AM): hey jungkook !! just thought I’d ask where you want to meet up before the wedding starts 
Jennie (9:53AM): since we’re each other’s plus ones, I think we should show up together but idk let me know what you think 
Jennie (9:53AM): I’m excited to see you again and catch up, it’s been so long !! :) 
You freeze, feeling your body overload with information and questions come flooding into your mind. At first, you think you reread the message wrong. You think that maybe Jennie is texting the wrong person. But after the third or fourth time, you realize that this isn’t a dream. That Jungkook already has a plus one to the wedding, and it isn’t you. 
More than that, it’s Jennie. 
Jennie is also someone you went to college with, and someone that you only heard of between the grape vines and therefore is someone that is only vaguely recognizable. But you definitely know her. Jennie had been one of Irene’s friends, president of her sorority—and labeled some of the nicest people on campus. Even just from rumors and the one time you ran into her around the school, you can see it. Jennie is nice, beautiful, friendly, and outgoing. All the things you are not. 
And now, she’s Jungkook’s plus one to the wedding. And Jungkook did not tell you. 
Your lips part as your head starts to spin. Why didn’t Jungkook tell you he already had a plus one to Irene’s wedding? Maybe he did not owe you the explanation, and maybe you should never have assumed he’d be your plus one to the wedding. 
The thought of you assuming Jungkook would be your date to the wedding fills you with a vague mortification—why did you have to go ahead and assume? 
Your mind starts to spiral as you fall into the depths of overthinking. Now you were set to attend a wedding alone, with no plus one, and surrounded by people you don’t know. All while watching Jungkook sit with Jennie, eat with Jennie, and dance with Jennie. 
Holy fuck, holy fuck, what were you going to do? You can’t go to this wedding alone. You can’t confront Jungkook about this—you’re not even supposed to be touching his phone or looking through his phone. He would definitely be upset. How could he not be? 
At once, the tears collect in your eyes. How could this be happening? Seconds ago, you had been so content and happy, excited to attend this wedding with Jungkook. Seconds ago, you had been confident about your feelings, and Jungkook’s feelings in return. From all the kisses he showered you in, the date, the talking, the confessing—how could you not feel that way? 
Had Jungkook just been pulling your leg? After all, he did have three years to talk to you, to go out with you. Why hadn’t he said something sooner? Is he here right now: talking to you and laughing with you because he hadn’t found anyone and knows that you would do anything for him? 
In the background, you can vaguely make out the shower in the bathroom turn off, signalling Jungkook’s near completion with the bathroom. At once, it feels like you’re in a car that has enforced sudden breaks and has sent you flying against the dashboard—like you can’t breathe. 
Hastily, you rest Jungkook’s phone back on the nightstand and roll back over to your side of the bed. You blink quickly, trying to rid of the tears that have collected in your eyes while also trying to calm the lump in the back of your throat. 
Just as you’re starting to get a handle back on your feelings, the bathroom door opens and you can vaguely make out Jungkook’s humming as he exits. The fact that he sounds so carefree while you’re hurting only a handful of feet away almost makes the tears come back in. But you’ve learned how to hide your emotions well. 
Jungkook’s soft laugh brings you out of your thoughts. “Still in bed?” He asks jokingly, sitting on the edge and placing a hand on your ankle. You try not to stiffen at the gesture. “You know, even though we’re getting dressed at a different hotel, we still need to get going.” 
You take in a breath. “I’m comfortable here,” You exclaim, sitting up and facing Jungkook. He’s looking as wide-eyed, easy-going, and comfortable as always. You’re not sure how long you can keep up the facade of being okay. “I was just waiting for you, that’s all.” 
You don’t wait for him to reply as you slide off the bed, grab your clothes from your suitcase, and lock yourself in the bathroom. You ignore the lump in your throat as you brush your teeth, as you get your day started. Finally, you look up at your own reflection in the mirror. Unlike previous times, when there had been a glimmer to your gaze—you don’t know you recognize the now disheartened individual before you. 
You exit the bathroom and immediately turn to pack up your suitcase once more, ignoring Jungkook in the process. The boy is on his phone, typing something—probably a text message. Maybe he’s responding to Jennie, confirming their date for tonight, as he remains completely oblivious to your feelings. 
The thought brings the tears back to your eyes. 
“Ready to go?” Jungkook asks, all smiles and soft eyes as he slides off the bed to face you. 
You don’t look at him as you shoulder your carry-on bag and straighten into a standing position. “Yeah.” You don’t mean for the tone to come out dry and unresponsive, but you’re too focused on trying to get the tears out of your throat. 
You miss the way the smile slowly slips off Jungkook’s face as he watches you move towards the door. 
Jungkook moves towards you, reaching forward to take your suitcase from you just as he’s done for the past few days. 
You, however, brush him off. “It’s okay, Jungkook.” You pull open the door and make your way down the hallway without looking back to see if he’s following closer behind you. You don’t need his help, you don’t need his pity. You don’t need him to do these things, to lead you on—especially if he was going to end up with some other girl at then end of the day. 
You stay quiet as you make your way to Jungkook’s car. Jungkook steals the occasional glance in your direction, seeming to finally realize that something is wrong. 
He, however, doesn’t say anything until you’re back on the freeway—on the five hour drive towards the wedding venue. “Everything okay?” 
You’re playing with your hair, but you stop long enough to spare him a short glance. You’re not even looking at his face, you’re looking at the chair he’s seated on. “What do you mean?” 
Jungkook clears his throat. “You’ve been really quiet since I got out of the bathroom. You…” He gestures to the center console. “You’re not even playing any music.” He tries for a smile. “I’d really like to listen to your ‘everything’ playlist.” 
“Sorry, I’m not really in a music-listening mood right now,” You whisper, realizing that you should probably cover up your ass a little better than you are currently. “S-Sorry, I think it was something at the restaurant yesterday. I’m not feeling super hot right now.” 
“Oh no, do we need to stop by a pharmacy or something? I can run in and get some stomach machine or whatever—!” 
“Jungkook, it’s fine.” 
Maybe it’s the finality of your tone, or the sharper edge in your voice, but Jungkook quiets down again. One glance in his direction shows you the furrow of his eyebrows, the set of his jawline—he looks hurt and confused. And that kills you inside. 
A small part of you wants you just lay all your cards on the table—to admit your side of the story and let him know about the texts and the hurt feeling still eating itself at your heart. 
But another part of you, the bigger part of you, doesn’t want to give Jungkook that power. You don’t want to be the one to crack first, to be the one who gets hurt first. So you refuse to say anything, settling deeper and deeper into the seat of Jungkook’s car. Contrary to your initial thoughts, he doesn’t plug in his own phone to play his own music. He simply allows the pair of you to bathe in silence. 
Without the music to distract you, without Jungkook trying to make conversation, it forces your mind to linger on the events of the early morning. Maybe Jungkook didn’t tell you because it was obvious to him that the pair of you would never have been a plus one to the wedding in general. He’s probably hurt because Jungkook can’t get his way with you. 
The realization that he doesn’t even have the consideration to warn you ahead of time that an invitation for a ride doesn’t equate to an invitation to be a plus one brings the tears back to your eyes. Did you not even deserve a warning? Why would Jungkook let you kiss him, let you fall in love with him—only to turn his back on you like this? 
You have to keep your eyes glued to the window of the passenger’s side of the car, just to make sure Jungkook won’t see the tears. You can just imagine that he’ll ask, and the conversation will steer the pair of you into an even more awkward space. 
It’s a very agonizing five hours. Not having that time to recover from the shock of those texts is becoming increasingly more difficult for you to handle. 
There are a few times that your tears overwhelm your whole system, where you have to sniff to get a handle on your body’s response to the emotions going through your body—which you’re sure Jungkook can hear. After all, there’s no music playing and there is a silence that is threatening to swallow you whole. 
Jungkook, however, does not say anything in response to your very obvious sniffle. He merely tightens his grip on the steering wheel, and keeps his mouth shut. You wonder if he’s waiting for you to talk first, to explain what’s going on with you. 
The sky is bleeding orange by the time Jungkook pulls into the new hotel, the final hotel. There is still two hours until the wedding is set to start, but every nerve in your body is screaming for you to leave and go back home. Every nerve in your body is telling you that you don’t belong here anymore. 
“Okay, I let you have your peace for the whole drive over,” Jungkook starts off, voice tight, fixing the car into park. “But I’m asking you this right now. Are you sure you’re okay? You don’t seem fine… and I’m worried about you…” He reaches across the car to land a hand on your shoulder. It’s a completely normal gesture, especially between you and Jungkook, but you cannot handle it. 
You jerk away. “I’m fine,” You snap out, actually fixing your gaze on him this time. Jungkook recoils, immediately retracting his arm from you, looking like you just burned him. You tear your gaze away from him. You’re not strong enough to see him hurt because of you. “Why do you care anyways?” 
Jungkook exhales in disbelief, turning towards the steering wheel of the car and running a hand through his hair. “What are you talking about? Is this about last night? Did I… say something to scare you off?” 
“This isn’t about what you said, this is about what you didn’t say and what you’re not telling me!” 
Jungkook looks like you just grew a second head. “What are you talking about?” 
You whirl back to face him. “Oh, so the fact that you and Miss. Jennie were already set to go to this fucking wedding together and you didn’t even think to give me a heads up and tell me?” 
Jungkook freezes like a deer in headlights. “What? How did you know about that?” 
You laugh, but it’s a hollow noise that only makes that lump come back to your throat. “Nevermind,” You bite out. This time, you don’t stop the tears from resurfacing as you give Jungkook a full look this time. His demeanor changes from frozen to pained at the sight. “I hope you guys are very happy together.” 
You don’t say another word as you fumble with the latch of the door before pushing it open with more strength than necessary. You can vaguely hear Jungkook struggling with his own seat belt, but you don’t care. You slam the car door shut and storm away. You don’t know where you’re going—maybe around the corner to scream, or to call a taxi that’ll take you to the airport. You don’t care about the wedding. You don’t think you could face the embarrassment in facing Jungkook or Jennie or Irene right now. 
“Shit, Y/N! Y/N!” Jungkook is calling for you now, his footsteps loud against the asphalt. 
Everything feels like you’re going through water, which is probably why Jungkook is able to reach you as quickly as he does. He catches you by the wrist. 
“Y/N—please, will you stop and just listen to me?” 
“No! Jungkook, let me go.” You start trying to tug your wrist, trying to pull yourself away from him. “Let me go! I’m leaving! I don’t want to see you anymore!” You’re gasping, the tears blurring your vision and making you feel powerless. 
Without a warning, Jungkook pulls you in his arms. Wrapping his arms around you, he traps you in his embrace. And you are miserable. 
“Stop it!” You gasp, trying to push him away. You’re heaving—crying and trying to escape from someone as strong as Jungkook is definitely a workout for your body. “Jungkook, leave me alone. This is all my fault.” 
He pauses. “What do you mean?” 
You stop struggling, allowing Jungkook to hold you as you pull back enough to look away from his face. You wipe at the tears on your face. “It’s my fault anyways. I said I liked you and you said you liked me too, but maybe that wasn’t enough for you. Just because we like each other doesn’t mean we’re exclusive. I should have asked up front, so I wouldn’t get hurt in the long run.” 
“You don’t need to get hurt though,” Jungkook whispers kindly, his voice overcoming the blood in your ears, as well as your own yelling. You quiet down at that, except for your own lungs contracting to catch more air. This leaves you a hiccuping mess. He waits until he knows you’re not going to say anything next. “You’re right, okay? Jennie and I were supposed to be each other’s dates.” 
You’re still trying to catch your breath. 
Jungkook rests a hand on top of your head, curling his fingers through the strands of your hair soothingly. “Are you okay?” 
You hiccup. “Why are you telling me this? I just told you that I’m hurt right now…” 
“Shhh.” Jungkook pulls back and cups your face in his hands so you can look at him. “You aren’t listening to me. I said we were supposed to be each other’s dates. We’re not anymore.” 
You blink, allowing the tears that were already filling your eyes to fall down your cheeks. Jungkook wipes them gently with his thumb. “What?” 
Jungkook’s gaze flickers between your eyes. “Jennie and I are friends, so we’d figure it would be fun to just go together and have a person to sit with, eat with, and dance with. As friends.” 
“W-What happened then?” You ask, a watery color in your voice. 
Jungkook gives you a gentle smile, the kind of gesture that tells you that you should know the answer already. “You happened, silly.” He keeps his eyes on yours. “I saw you at the party with Jimin and invited you to come with me. I assumed when I asked that we’d be each other’s plus ones. I forgot to tell Jennie though when I asked you out.” He tilts his head at you. “You saw the texts on my phone, didn’t you?”
“I-I’m sorry.” You hiccup again. “Your phone kept going off this morning and I was just trying to put it on silent. I-I didn’t mean to look through your messages…” 
“Shh, baby, you’re good, you’re okay.” Jungkook interrupts gently, wrapping his arms tighter around you and swaying the pair of you back and forth. The usage of the nickname fills you with a new feeling, a warmer feeling. It helps calm you down. 
Your breathing eventually evens out, bringing you back to reality and to the realization that you and Jungkook are hugging in the middle of a hotel parking lot. 
Jungkook loosens his grip on you, letting you step back. He watches you for a moment. “Here,” He says, digging through his pocket and pulling out his phone. “I think you should see this.” He clicks through a few of his apps, until he seems to find what he’s looking for because he hands the phone to you. You look over at him, confusion flooding through your features. Jungkook gives you a reassuring nod. “It’s okay.” 
Still hesitant, you take the phone and look at the messages across the screen. It’s the texts from this morning. 
Jennie (9:53AM): hey jungkook !! just thought I’d ask where you want to meet up before the wedding starts 
Jennie (9:53AM): since we’re each other’s plus ones, I think we should show up together but idk let me know what you think 
Jennie (9:53AM): I’m excited to see you again and catch up, it’s been so long !! :) 
Jungkook (10:20AM): hey Jennie !! oh shit i totally forgot to let u know but i actually found a plus one :( i’m soooo sorry i should have told you earlier omg i feel terrible 
Jennie (10:20AM): no worries jungkook !! who is it omg do I know them? 
Jungkook (10:20AM): it’s actually Y/N? We all went to college together… 
Jennie (10:20AM): OH!!!! wait isn’t she the one Irene was working with a lot for senior projects? 
Jennie (10:20AM): OH HOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO
Jennie (10:21AM): OKAY JUNGKOOK I SEE U 
Jennie (10:21AM): she’s THE Y/N right???? the one u were in love with for our entire college career?? 
Jungkook (10:22AM): …… maybe? 
Jennie (10:22AM): WOWOWOWOW good for u Jungkook !!! glad to see u finally having the balls to ask her out !! 
Jungkook (10:22AM): OKAY THAT’S ENOUGH 
Jungkook (10:23AM): I actually felt BAD for leaving you by yourself BUT NOT ANYMORE 
Jennie (10:23AM): LMAO Jungkook I’m friends with Irene’s entire bridesmaid row i’ll be fine 
Jennie (10:23AM): just go get ur dick wet!!!!!! 
Jungkook (10:23AM): istg i will leave you on read 
Jungkook (10:23AM): also that is NOT the point!!!!!! Just wanna love my new girl :( 
Jennie (10:24AM): You’re gross 
Jennie (10:24AM): but sounds good see you tonight! 
You look up from Jungkook’s phone to see him watching you carefully, gauging your reaction, pleading for you to forgive him. 
The only thought that can be translated into a coherent sentence comes out: “You were in love with me during college?” 
Jungkook exhales in a laugh, his arms finding your waist once again. “I think ‘in love with’ was a bit of a stretch back then. I think you could agree that we didn’t know each other well enough before for me to say that.” 
You’re still looking at him. “Back then…?” You echo. 
He nods. “Back then.” He brings you closer, one hand moving up to gently brush at the skin of your cheek. “But it’s different now. Now, I can say with absolute certainty that I’m in love with you.” 
Your lips part. “You’re in love with me?” The tears spring back into your eyes, but for a different reason entirely. The emotional rollercoaster you have just been on is unbelievable. 
Jungkook’s eyes widen at the sight of your tears. “Oh shit, I’m sorry! Is that too fast? I’m sorry, I should have given you a warning or something. Or more time at least. Oh no, please don’t cry…” 
You brush him off with a watery laugh, waving his concern away. “It’s okay Jungkook. This is fine, really.” You give him a smile. “I love you too. I really thought you were pulling my leg or something.” 
Jungkook gives you his own small smile. “I’m sorry. I should have brought this up sooner about us being each other’s plus ones. Just because I assume something doesn’t mean it’s an established thing.” He brings you closer, his smile turning into a grin. “You love me too, huh?” 
You giggle. You’re too strung out to come up with something witty or clever. “Yeah…” 
Jungkook is still smiling, his gaze switching between your lips and your eyes. “I’m gonna kiss you now.” 
You nod. “About time.” 
He kisses you again, softly and sweetly, tongue slipping past the seam of your lips but it’s gentle caresses that make your heart feel like it’s crawling up your throat. 
“OH MY GOD GET A ROOM!” A voice calls from the other side of the parking lot, forcing you and Jungkook to pull away. The pair of you look at each other and you start to laugh. 
Jungkook kisses your forehead, sweeping down to your ear. “How about we check into our room and get ready?” 
You giggle, nodding over at him. “That sounds good.” 
So Jungkook leads the way, wrapping an arm around your shoulder as you gather your suitcases from the car and enter the lobby. You check in easily, as Jungkook is provided a map with directions on how to reach the room. 
The pair of you don’t pull away once until Jungkook is sliding the key card into the door and pushing it open to reveal the bedroom you’ll be sharing for the night. 
Both you and Jungkook park your suitcases near the foot of the bed, as per usual. 
“Do you want to use the bathroom?” Jungkook offers. 
You nod, smiling softly. “Okay.” 
You gather the dress you’ve brought in your arms, about to enter the bathroom, before Jungkook’s voice stops you. “Hey,” He calls, approaching you and wrapping you in his arms again. He’s much more handsey this time, like he needs to make sure you’re not going to run away again, like you’re going to be okay. “You feel better now?” His thumb brushes your lips. “Your eyes are still a little red.” 
You nod. “The makeup will probably help that,” You reassure in a soft voice. 
Jungkook mirrors your movements. “Still, how about I get some ice for you so you can put something cold underneath your eyes… to stop the puffing.” 
He looks genuinely concerned and worried for your wellbeing that you can’t help but smile. Since he is insisting, you decide to just let him be. “Okay, Jungkook.” 
He smiles. “Okay! You start getting ready and I’ll get the ice, okay?” A quick kiss on your cheek before he’s bounding out of the door with the provided ice buckets. 
Your eyes linger on the door for a few minutes before you’re turning back to your suitcase. The dress you have picked is a pink flowing floor-length number—something Karly helped you pick out before leaving. It’s soft enough that it doesn’t leave crease marks along the fabric, which had made this outfit perfect for the trip. You take the dress and your bag of makeup before entering the bathroom. You’re just slipping on the dress when you hear the hotel room door open and close. 
“Okay, I got the ice!” Jungkook announces through the bathroom door. “Did you want to work on your eyes right now?” 
“Sure,” You call back. “Do you mind zipping me up first?” 
“Of course,” Jungkook returns, sounding distracting as you open the door to the bathroom. You peek your head through, noticing Jungkook opening his suitcase on the floor and sorting through it—probably for his own suit. 
He must hear the door open, because he looks up towards you. Immediately, his eyes widen as he straightens up into a standing position. “O-Oh wow…” He’s looking you over up and down, up and down, as if he needs to commit this to memory. “Y-You look great. Beautiful.” 
“Really?” You stammer back. “Thank you.” 
Jungkook keeps his eyes on you as he approaches you. “You needed me to zip you up?” 
“O-Oh right, yeah.” Hastily, you turn around, brushing the hair from your back to expose your undone zipper, and your bare back. 
You think that he purposely grazes the tips of his fingers against your skin in his process of bringing the zipper up to the top of the fabric. You’re about to turn, thank him, but his hands back at your waist do the gesture for you. “Thank you.” 
“You’re welcome. You look really pretty.” 
You pout. “You’re being too nice to me.” 
Jungkook whines, hugging you close to him. “You’re too cute.” He noses at your temple. “I just wanted to see you smile.” He pulls away after a moment. “Let’s take care of your face, yeah?” He turns around and returns with a small baggy full of ice. “Here, sit down for a second.” He leaves for a second, returning back with a towel. “Maybe… five minutes each eye. I don’t know. I’ll get ready while we’re waiting.” 
So he takes his suit out from his case and disappears into the bathroom, leaving you alone with a towel of ice pressed against your eye. The cooling sensation definitely helps with the puffiness. 
Jungkook appears from the bathroom a few minutes later—dressed in a black suit with a white button-down and a long skinny black tie. His hair has been fiddled with a little, but he still has that messy, boyish, lovable appearance that makes your heart race. 
“Did you switch the towel?” 
You nod. 
“How do you feel?” 
Slowly, you bring the towel down and rest it on your lap. You look at Jungkook. “How do I look?” 
He leans forward towards you, holding your chin gently between his fingers. “You look better. Did you need to finish getting ready?” 
“Yeah. I just need to touch up my makeup.” 
“Okay, go ahead then.” 
Jungkook takes the towel, and watches as you make your way back to the bathroom. You’re only gone for a few minutes before you’re emerging once more—eyeshadow a little darker, lashes a little closer, and lips slightly pinker, but overall still looking like the same version of the girl he fell in love with. 
The pair of you drive to the wedding venue, a cute brick building with browns, greens, and whites surrounding. Guests already swarm the outside area, some of whom you recognize from college. The sight makes you nervous. 
Jungkook sees this, and he reaches over to grab onto your hand. “You can just stick with me, okay?” He smiles. “I’ll protect you.” 
You roll your eyes, but you are thankful to have Jungkook as your source of comfort and be that person you could run back to. 
He parks and meets you at the front of his car, where you lace fingers and make your way towards the venue. You go through a small round of hellos and ‘nice to finally meet you’ conversations—most notably from Mingyu and Jennie, both of whom light up at the sight of your presence. Contrary to your previous worries, you find that you don’t really need to be so nervous. Mingyu and Jennie are friends of Jungkook’s for a reason—they radiate a relaxing nature that you can tell is what has drawn the three of them to each other. 
They ask about you, your college experience, your current experience, passing easy conversation in the ceremony space right before the start of the wedding. It’s fun to see Jungkook joking around with the friends he grew up with, and even more fun to see how easy you are allowed into that world. 
The actual wedding ceremony is a blur. You vaguely recognize the extremely attractive, excited, and watery-eyed version of Seokjin at the head of the aisle. You definitely recognize the equally as attractive, excited, and watery-eyed version of Irene, downed in white lace and looking much more beautiful than you ever remember her. Vows are exchanged, kisses are shared, there’s an applause, and pictures are taken before the guests are ushered into the main entry room—decked out with a bar and a few scattered seating areas. Jungkook whispers to you that guests are put here temporarily, as the ceremony space is being converted into a dining area. 
True to Jungkook’s promise, he lingers by your side most of the night. Although you reassure him that you are fine, you are much more emotionally stable compared to a few hours ago, and that perhaps you are okay catching up with Nayeon—another girl from college, actually someone from the first party you ever attended who defended you when you were receiving unwanted attention—but Jungkook simply tells you that he likes being around you. He likes being able to put his arm around you, likes to rest his hand at your waist, likes people knowing that he has you. 
It’s a few more minutes of conversation, of laughter, of old stories being exchanged between people you haven’t seen for years, when the guests are called back into the newly converted dining area. Instead of rows of chairs lined up, there are round tables filling the space. The long panel of doors once closed along the wall of the room have been opened—exposing a gazebo with a D.J. and a dance floor, all encircled by a string of big bright fairy lights. 
You and Jungkook are situated at the same table as most of the guests you recognize from college. You assume this is purposefully done to give you all a common ground, and it works because conversations spring easily between you all. Even when you’re not talking about your experiences from university, you’re able to transition from topic to topic. You and Jungkook occasionally talk amongst yourselves as you’re eating, but you sit together and laugh together when Irene and Seokjin emerge and listen in during the wedding toasts. 
Finally, Irene and Seokjin make their rounds through the room, stopping at the tables to cheer and laugh and exchange a few words of congratulations and conversation. Following this process, everyone at your table stands on their feet as Irene and Seokjin make their way towards you. There are bright smiles, Irene’s cheerful gasp as she takes in all the guests that have come to join her. She circles your table, hugging every guest, continuing this when she reaches you. 
Irene grins at the sight of you. “Y/N! Oh my gosh, it’s been so long!” 
“I know!” You return, pulling away from Irene. “Congratulations. This wedding is beautiful.” 
She beams, absolutely radiating in her white dress and glittering makeup. “Thank you so much for coming! But oh my god, are the rumors true, did you really show up—!” She looks over your shoulder, and grins again. “Jungkook!” She hugs Jungkook. “I should be saying congratulations to the two of you. I was surprised to get the text from Jungkook saying that you guys were coming as each other’s dates. Gave me a whole pain because I had to switch some seats around at the last minute. But anything for my favorite people.” She turns to you and holds onto your arms. “Jungkook has had a crush on you for years, so you’re really doing him a huge favor.” 
“Okay, enough,” Jungkook interrupts, scowling. But there is still that playful look in his eyes. “Did all your friends know about this? Jennie knew something was up too when I texted her.” 
Irene presses her lips together. “Mingyu might have mentioned something.” She presses her hand to Jungkook’s cheek. “Stay safe, you guys. Hope you enjoy the rest of the night.” She moves onto her next guest. 
Jungkook is groaning. “Remind me to never tell Mingyu anything ever again.” He glares at the boy from across the table. “Gonna fling some peanuts at that son of a bitch.” 
You laugh, wrapping your arms around Jungkook’s waist. “Oh, let him be. It’s Irene’s wedding. You can get him tomorrow.” 
Jungkook pouts, but he does wrap his own arm around your shoulder. “Ah, love my girl—promoting evil behavior after festive events.” He kisses your cheek as your table takes their seats once more. 
The good natured atmosphere continues as you and Jungkook down your food, remaining fully engaged in the conversations happening around the table. After another hour of this, the DJ announces the start of the married couple’s first dance. Irene and Seokjin take to the dance floor and spin around, her white dress flowing around the room like light. Underneath the glow of the fairy lights, it looks like the couple is in an entirely new world. And you are so taken by it. 
Jungkook does not turn to you until the DJ plays a slow song—a first slow song after a series of upbeat dance and pop genres. He jerks his head towards the dance floor. “You want to dance?” 
You take his hand when he offers. “Of course.” He leads you across the room, towards the gazebo, where several other couples have moved to cling to one another. Jungkook pulls you in: one hand on your waist and the other with your own hand. “This is really nice,” You start off. 
Jungkook laughs. “The wedding, or the dance?” 
You smile over at him. “Both. Being able to slow dance with you, however, is marginally better.” 
Jungkook is quiet for a little after that. He seems content just staring at your eyes, taking in the magic of this moment. “Thank you for coming with me,” He starts. “The whole road trip thing. Definitely would not have been as fun if I did all that by myself.” 
“Well, thank you for inviting me,” You return. “Even though we had that big misunderstanding. I had a lot of fun.” 
“Hey.” Jungkook angles his head a little so he can look at you in the eyes. “You know that I would never hurt you, right? You’re too important to me that I wouldn’t even think to pull some stupid shit like that again. You know that I love you too much to do that to you, right?” 
“I do know now,” You say, gazing over at him. “And I love you too.” 
You’re not usually an expressive person. But it’s worth saying those words just to see the grin that overtakes Jungkook’s face. It’s worth even more when he leans forward, kissing you openly in front of all his friends, nibbling gently at your bottom lip, running his tongue over the wound, and into your mouth. It’s worth it to have his fingers dusting sweetly over your skin, coaxing your mouth to open to allow exploration. 
It feels like worlds pass before Jungkook pulls away, giving you that breathless smile dimple and all, before he’s leaning forward to bury his face into your neck. 
“I think the drive home will be fun,” Jungkook mutters softly. 
“Hm?” You hum, eyes closed as he presses tiny kisses along your neck. 
“Most definitely,” Jungkook says, lifting himself just enough so that his lips hover over your ear lobe. “Because I plan on fucking you in every hotel bed for the rest of the trip.” 
You feel your heart race, your cheeks heat. Yes, this was definitely worth it. 
2K notes · View notes
formulinos · 3 years
Text
five years ago, nico rosberg had the balls to walk out of formula 1 at the very top after winning his championship. i, personally, like to think of myself as jacques villeneuve, decadent, unhinged, burning every bridge he had until he just couldn’t go back in during the middle of a season. either way, i’m leaving this blog lol!
it might seem overdramatic at first, and it is, but i wanted to explain myself so it doesn’t look like it’s just a fit caused by mental struggles or something like that. when i started this blog, my goals were to go apeshit about the stuff i liked and have fun. i think it was a mega W that i managed to do that, and i swore to myself i would burn it all to the ground if it stopped being fun. truth is, i enjoy still very much writing and doing my photo edits, but something’s missing here i didn’t like that much, and the fact that after one week of minor-to-severe issues i barely thought twice about changing my mind means that indeed, it was time to close the curtains.
but this is not a sad call and it doesn’t have to be! i’m pretty happy because during my small (and weird) time on f1blr, i was amazed at how talented i was, because i really didn’t know i had it in me and i learnt so much while doing my content. but beyond my own genius, you lot are fucking iconic. you guys might not realise it about yourselves, or self-doubt a bit too much, but the fact so many of you legit are able to do amazing photo edits, graphic designs, video edits, fancams, long write ups, fanfiction, mining in the darkest corner of the web, etc etc, as proper professionals, all of this, starting from formula fucking one? sometimes even two or three? FREC? W Series? Formula E? Indy fucking Car???? you bitches are talented! even if you think you don’t do any of this so you don’t deserve praise, you guys interact with all of this content and you create amazing experiences for many people. professionally speaking, it was an honour to be alongside you.
character wise though, well. some of you are real dicks who probably are far past redemption and in a next life will come back as cockroaches and you really need to properly look inside yourselves to halt the idiocy. BUT i met a lot of people who are awesome, who made me laugh so hard, and cry in the best way possible, and these past few days the amount of support and love i got far outweighed the bad, and so many people who hadn’t ever even said hi to me came to give me their support! i wish i could answer everyone on my dms and my askbox but it’s still a bit sore. i never said i wasn’t one of those dicks who will come back as cockroaches, but i’m trying not to haha. all i can say is thank you a million times for everything and apologise for my lack of fortitude.
the blog will stay up for a while just so i have the time to get the contact of people who i liked (and i don’t think anyone will want to but if you would like to keep in touch then let’s change discords or something). i also worked pretty hard, esp on the hyperfixation corners so i’m not ready to delete them. then i’ll either password protect it or deactivate overall but i can always be a hypocrite, swallow my words and pretend this never happened!
i had a lot of fun and i was myself. sorry again for any disturbances caused!
forza ferrari and fuck off (lovingly)
ana :)
108 notes · View notes
nothinghcppens · 3 years
Text
small talk- pietro maximoff
part 2
part 1 here
masterlist
Tumblr media
pair: pietro maximoff x female!reader
summary: after being apart of the team of super soldiers that hydra experimented on, y/n was one of the successful experiments and had been released to the world. the winter soldier and the siren had become the most prolific assassin duo in the world. but what happens when they get taken in by the avengers? what happens when she meets a particularly fast superhero with an attitude?
warnings: swearing, mentions of trauma, alcohol, kissing but like only that, minor sexual jokes
a/n: hi !! i just wanted to say thank you so much for all the love and support of part 1 of small talk and bad liar omg <3 i also wanted to add a taglist to future fics so let me know if you want added it! make sure to specify if you want to be added to the marvel or the harry potter one bc i have a harry potter fic in the works rn! also i’m gonna write a part three that’s just cute bc i want to keep writing this character heheh
“wake up!” splash.
the feeling of cold water hitting your face shocked you awake and you sat up with a gasp. trails of blue flashed from beside your bed and out the door, the clang of a bucket hitting the floor. “pietro maximoff. i am going to kill your speedy ass!” you shouted, jumping out of bed. not even caring that you were only in a t-shirt and shorts, you chased after him, following the blue light.
the trails stopped eventually, and so did you. you glanced around, listening for any sign of him. you crept over to one of the couches and grabbed a pillow as a weapon. “where are you?” you called, i’m a sing-song voice.
you walked around the room, “come on, don’t hide from me now.” the faint sound of his breathing was heard along with the dripping water from your hair and t-shirt. you followed the sound of his shallow breaths to the island in the kitchen. you dropped the pillow, climbed up on the island and crawled across it before swung your head over the edge, in front of his. “hey there.
he gasped, “shit.” you flipped your hair back up and sat back on your knees. pietro stood up and turned to face you before bursting into fits of laughter.
“i don’t know what’s funny.” you mumbled, glaring up at him.
“yes you do, you look ridiculous.” he huffed between laughs.
“i won’t look ridiculous when i’m putting a bullet through your head.” you spat.
“calm down, love. it’s only a bit of fun.” he said.
“i was sleeping piet!” you protested. you moved your legs so that they were dangling off the edge.
“okay, i’m sorry. i’m sorry!”
“you better be. i’ll get you back though.”
he stepped forward and leaned his hands on the island, on either side of you. “will you, yeah?”
his head was an inch away from yours, you could feel his breath against your face. you saw his eyes drift from your eyes to your lips and back up again. he leaned in slightly and your breathing quickened. “what’re you doing?” you whispered.
“what do you think i’m doing?” he replied in the same hushed tone.
“something you should’ve done a long time ago.” you leaned in towards him, lips almost touching.
“good morning!” cap announced, walking into the kitchen, looking at his phone. you two broke apart quickly, pietro speeding and grabbing you a glass of orange juice and ten occupying himself by looking at something in the cupboard.
“hey cap.” you croaked, voice uneasy from the nerves coursing through your body. “morning steve.” pietro greeted, closing the cupboard and standing next to you on the counter. steve didn’t look up from his phone and didn’t notice your wet hair and clothes
“how’s our newest recruit?” he asked as he grabbed a mug from one of the shelves.
“steve, i’ve been here for like 6 months!” you complained.
he put the mug in the coffee machine and pressed a few buttons, “and? you’re still the newest.”
“might be the newest but i could still take you down old man.”
“don’t get too cocky kid, i think pietro’s rubbing off on you.”
“ew i’d rather go back to being tortured than be like him.” you joked.
“how dare you! you know you love being around me.”
you made fake gagging noise and steve let out a laugh. he finally turned around and looked at you two for the first time this morning.
“oh- uh y/n? what happened, why are you soaked?” he asked, averting his eyes from you. your eyes widened in realisation that you were wearing little-to-nothing in front of your captain and your t-shirt was clinging to your body.
“pietro is a dick is what happened.” you said, pushing yourself off the table. “if you’ll excuse me, i’ll go make myself decent.”
“you look decent all the time, love!” pietro called after you as you began to leave the kitchen. you swivelled round and flipped him off with both hands before leaving the room.
———
“do you remember when-“ you let out a giggle and pointed at bucky, “when we had to kill those french agents and you-“ another laugh, “you fell over a wall! god i mean because my brain was mush i couldn’t laugh but looking back on it that shit was hilarious!”
you and the team were recalling old missions gone wrong, with the assistance of alcohol obviously, and you were telling a story about you and bucky- much to his dismay.
“i didn’t fall.” he protested, taking a swig from the bottom of beer in his hand.
“so what happened then? did the sidewalk just crumble?” you questioned, laughing loudly. the rest of the team sat observing the interaction, large smiles across all their face. pietro sat to your left with his arm around your shoulder, a drink in his other hand.
“okay. maybe i did fall.” bucky mumbled causing a roar of laughter from everyone. “but, remember how we were running through a forest in, where was it again?-“
“bulgaria.” you said, already knowing where this was going.
“bulgaria! yes. and it was raining so it was super muddy and you got suck in the mud!” he laughed.
“you left me there! i had to drag myself out.” you complained.
“well we had a mission to complete! you would’ve done the same.”
you rolled your eyes, “you’re right. i would have.” you felt pietro laugh from beside you and you smiled at him. “time for a refill.” you announced, pushing yourself up off the sofa. you wandered to the kitchen and took the bottle of wine on the table and poured some into your glass. due to the alcohol already in your system you spilled a little on the counter, “shit.” you muttered.
“need some help there?” pietro asked.
“i can pour wine myself thank you very much.” you retorted.
“i think the table disagrees.” he chuckled.
“shut up.” you groaned. pietro sped from the door to grab a towel and stopped behind you. he reached over your shoulder and wiped the spilled wine up. his breath was hot against your neck. you turned around, wine glass in hand, and looked up into his eyes. his hands remained on either side of you.
“this is the second time we’ve ended up here.” he mumbled.
“good observation, captain obvious.” you teased. pietro rolled his eyes and huffed out a laugh.
pietro took his right hand and tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear, staring into your eyes. he kept his hand on the side of your head and leant in slightly for the second time in the past week. your breathing deepened and your heart was thumping against your chest. you tilted your head up towards his head and your lips were almost touching, just as they were a few days ago
“y/n! can you get me a whiskey before you come back?!” tony called from the other room.
pietro groaned in frustration and pulled away from you, tilting his head up. “i’m going to kill those avengers.”
“good luck with that speedy.” you said, tapping his chest lightly.
he stepped away from you, letting you leave his embrace to get tony a drink. after pouring him a glass of whiskey and grabbing your glass of wine, you and pietro entered the room filled with your team. his hand was placed in the small of your back, guiding you back to the sofa.
you handed tony his drink and he smiled at you, “thanks kid.”
pietro sat on the couch and you flopped down beside him, his arm resuming its place of around your shoulder. you swung your legs up and across pietro’s legs, earning a few looks from nat and clint. they looked at each other and raised their eyebrows with a smirk.
steve and bucky were telling a story of a party they went to in the 40s and how bucky had to drag him to dance with these girls they met. you took a sip of your drink and noticed pietro’s eyes glancing at your lips, “want a sip?” you asked, smirking because you knew that’s not what he was looking at.
he pushed his tongue against the inside of his cheek and sighed, “watch it, y/l/n.”
“oooooooh we’re on last name terms now?” you teased, smiling.
“yeah if you keep pissing me off we will be.”
“don’t be so easy to piss off.” you replied.
he leaned over and whispered in your ear, “cant help it. i’m frustrated.”
you pushed out your bottom lip in an overdramatic pout, “boohoo.”
tony then shot forward in his seat and clapped his hands together, “tomorrow you two,” he said, pointing at you and bucky, “are gonna have a little fashion show, i’ve been working on some suits for you guys and i need your input.”
“wait really?” you asked.
“yup. i’m not having you two going on missions in your hydra gear.” he explained.
“shit, thanks tony.” bucky replied.
“where’s my suit?” pietro questioned.
“you’ll get on eventually. your girlfriend is just a little more improtant.”
“i was here first.” he protested.
“girlfriend?” you asked at the same time.
“wait your turn, turbo.” tony said.
pietro scoffed and everyone laughed at the interaction.
nat stretched her arms behind her head and yawned, “alright losers, i’m going to bed.”
“yeah, me too.” clint added.
eventually everyone had made their way upstairs and all that was left was you, tony and pietro.
“okay. what’s going on here?” tony asked, wagging his finger between you guys. pietro’s hand was now resting on your leg which was still across his.
“nothing.” you said.
“uh huh? yeah that bullshit doesn’t work on me kiddo.”
“piet, sure nothing has happened.” you glanced at him and a look of annoyance crossed his face.
“yeah stark. nothings happened.” he replied through gritted teeth.
“well if anything does happen, stay safe.” he winked at you two, “and if you hurt her, speedy, she’ll probably hurt you back worse.”
you laughed, “hell yeah i will.”
“oh i know you will.”
“goodnight .” tony said as he stood up from his chair and left the room.
you swung your legs off pietro and stood up, “well goodnight piet.” a smirk grew across your face as you began to walk away.
“nope.” he stated, grabbing your wrist and turning you back around. he pulled you onto his lap so you were straddling him, legs on either side of him. he placed his hand on the back of your neck and pulled your head towards his before crashing your lips onto his.
the kiss was heated, after being denied it twice before. your hands moved from his shoulders to the back of his neck and his moved to your waist. his fingers dug into your hips causing you to moan slightly, he took this opportunity to intertwine his tongue with yours.
eventually you broke apart, both gasping for air. you placed your forehead against his and closed your eyes.
“you don’t understand how long i’ve wanted to do that.” he muttered.
“worth it?” you asked, teasing him.
“nope.” he joked.
you leaned back and glared at him, “you bitch.” you leaned in and kissed him again, running your fingers through his hair and pulling it slightly. he groaned against your lips and you smiled through the kiss, enjoying the effect you had on him.
pulling away for the second time, you both had content smiles on your faces. you leaned your head on his shoulder and closed your eyes, “you’re comfortable.”
he let out a hearty laugh, “thank you?”
“it’s a compliment, i could sit here forever.”
suddenly you were no long sitting on top of him, you were being picked up and whisked through the building. your hair blew around until you stopped and were in your room. “what just happened?”
“i’m tired and the couch didn’t seem good to sleep on.” he explained.
“woah, woah, woah. who said you’re sleeping in my room?”
“i did.” he stated. using his powers he stripped himself down to his underwear and jumped on your bed, under the covers.
“i regret kissing you. you’re a pain in the ass.” you complained.
“and you called me a bitch?!” he exclaimed.
you rolled your eyes and grabbed your pyjamas that were at the foot of your bed and walked to your bathroom.
“where are you going?” he asked.
“getting changed, i don’t want you watching.”
you closed the door to block out his protests and quickly got ready for bed.
“hurry up.” pietro called.
“stop complaining or i’m going to sleep on the couch.” you replied, opening the door and leaning against the doorframe. pietro was sat with his arms crossed over his chest, his eyes raked over your body and a small smirk grew on his face. “eyes up here pretty boy.”
he laughed and pulled back the cover before patting the spot next to him, signalling for you to join him. you shuffled over and slid into the bed. pietro wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close.
“so much for the whole tough super soldier act, you’re a softie at heart, aren’t you love?” he muttered in your ear.
“anymore of that and i’ll suffocate you in your sleep with this pillow.” you replied, closing your eyes and relaxed into his embrace.
“no you won’t. you’re too soft.” he teased.
“pietro. i’m warning you.” you yawned, “i don’t care how good looking you are i will kill you.”
“good looking huh?”
“fuck off and go to sleep.” you spat.
“sweet dreams, y/n.” he said with a small laugh.
“yep they won’t be about you.” you murmured, before dozing off to sleep.
———
“i knew it!” nat squealed. you squeezed your eyes close and then opened them, blinking rapidly. pietro lay behind you with his arm draped over your waist. he groaned against your neck and looked over his shoulder at the team standing at the door.
“piet what’s going on?” you grumbled, too tired to sit up and look for yourself.
“so when did this happen?” cap asked.
you finally turned over and sat up, seeing everyone stood in your room. “what the fuck? get out my room you creeps!” you shouted, grabbing the pillow behind your head and throwing it towards them.
“oh come on kid, when did it happen?” he repeated.
“none of your business steve.”
“we’re not leaving until we find out.” clint added.
“you’re awfully quiet little brother, nothing to add?” wanda said.
“i cant believe this.” you muttered, lying back down.
“last night, happy? but all we did was kiss okay, nothing else.” you explained.
“yet.” pietro stated. you elbowed him in the stomach and he winced at the impact.
“so are you two together now?” nat asked.
“well we haven’t had the chance to speak about it because you guys ruined our morning!” you exclaimed.
“what’s going on?” bucky asked, rubbing his eyes. he peered in over everyone and laughed, “nevermind.”
it seemed that pietro had had enough too so he sped out of bed and pushed everyone outside the room, closed the door and locked it. “much better.” he said.
you heard the murmurs of everyone outside, “use a condom!” clint shouted. footsteps retreated from your door as everyone left to go about their day.
“i’m moving out i can’t live here anymore.” you groaned.
“it’s not that bad, you’ve got me.” he said, crawling back onto the bed and lying on top of you. you wrapped your arms around his head and played with his hair.
“so are we like together now?” you asked, mocking natasha’s previously asked question.
“would you like that?” he asked.
“god no.” you joked, “obviously dumbass.”
he lifted his head up and leaned in to kiss you.
“nope. you’ve not brushed your teeth.”
356 notes · View notes
nctsjiho · 3 years
Text
Too Far
warnings: strong language, mentions of food (diet, eating habits, body image, throwing up/making yourself throw up), bit angsty o_O
era: mid 2019
❀ Yuta’s protectiveness over JiHo gets a bit out of hand when he takes his anger out on the wrong person
Tumblr media
“Sweetheart of course you’re gaining weight if you keep up eating like that. Your metabolism isn’t always going to stay this fast.” JiHo looked up from her plate of delicious looking pasta to meet the gaze of the older lady in front of her. She worked for SM and JiHo had seen her around a lot, but she had no clue what her job position was. All she knew was that this lady always had her nose stuck in other people’s business and wasn’t afraid to share her opinion and “advice”.
JiHo picked at her food with her fork a few times before saying something back. “But I like this food. It’s good.” The lady scoffed at the young girl’s words. “If that’s what you want.” She leaned back against the table behind her, a sickening smile appearing on her face. “If you like it that much that’s no problem. Eat all you want and all you have to do to maintain that figure of yours is stick your two fingers down your throat after every meal. That will work just as well-” “Excuse you?”
Both JiHo and the older lady turned to look at the doorway where Yuta stood with an angry expression washed over his face. “Tell your friend that eating like this will only make her fat. Girl idols should look after their looks not-” Yuta rushed over to the girls - well girl and women - and slammed his hand against the table.
“And why do you care?” The Japanese boy’s voice was low and laced with venom. “Because as a former model, I know how hard it is to maintain weight. With her eating habits-” The scoff that left Yuta’s lips caught the lady of guard and caused her to stop mid sentence.
All the while the lady kept commenting on JiHo’s weight and eating and Yuta was defending her and kindly telling her to “fuck off” at some point, JiHo continued to eat her meal while scrolling down social media on her phone.
She didn’t know how long the other two in the room were arguing but at some point, when her food was nearly finished, JiHo felt herself getting pulled up by her wrist. “What-” “Let’s go.” Yuta growled through gritted teeth and pulled the girl outside of the room.
Ignoring all of JiHo’s protests and questions if he could slow down, Yuta kept walking until the reached an empty hallway near the back of the building - somewhere not a lot of people passed.
“Why didn’t you speak up for yourself?” JiHo tilted her head as if confused and shrugged her shoulders. “Why would I?” The question seemed to tip the boy off a little more. “Why wouldn’t you? She had no business talking to you about your weight and what you look like. You should’ve said something.”
A sad smile formed on JiHo’s lips. She felt bad that Yuta cared so much to the point that he got angry. In all honesty the lady really didn’t get to JiHo at all, she didn’t care what some random person had to say.
“Oppa,” she began, “you know I don’t care about these things. I’m happy with the way I look and some random person isn’t going to change that.” She explained, but it didn’t look like it eased Yuta’s lingering anger. “Still! You should’ve said something. Are you really going to let people talk to you like that?”
Now it was JiHo’s turn to scoff. Did he even listen when she explained that she didn’t care about what other people thought and said about her? “I-” “All you did was scroll through that damn phone of yours while you let her talk down on you!” He interrupted her words, clearly too angry to listen to what she had to say.
His eyes locked with JiHo’s phone and before either of them knew it JiHo’s phone was in pieces on the tiled floor. JiHo’s eyes widened as she took in what happened. It all happened so fast that she had to do a double take.
“Did you just...?” She whispered and Yuta stayed quiet for a while, his eyes still fixed on the broken phone. “You’re on that stupid device too much anyway!” He suddenly yelled again. “So you throw my phone on the ground? Who are you? My dad?” The girl sneered at him and turned her head away from him.
Again a few moments of silence surrounded the pair until Yuta noticed JiHo’s hand stretched out in front of her. Her palm was turned upwards, presenting her opened hand to Yuta. “What?” “Your phone.” Her voice had gotten dangerously low. JiHo was trying so hard not to show her anger and disbelief in her voice.
Yuta couldn’t help but chuckle a bit at the words. “You don’t believe I’m going to hand you my phone right now, right?” Suddenly the pair were stuck making eye contact with each other again. “Wouldn’t that just be fair now?” “I’m older than you JiHo-” An exaggerated laugh left JiHo’s lips as she threw her head back.
“Don’t pull that age hierarchy bullshit on me right now. If you want me to treat you respectfully then be respectful towards me as well. Now hand me your phone.” Yuta’s eyes widened, but he tried his hardest not to show how taken aback he was by the girl’s words. She had a way to be intimidating towards even the most fearless and strongest members. Her smaller frame helping to make the contrast between her youthful looks and fearless confidence even more surprising.
JiHo’s eyes stayed staring straight into his own and her hand stayed were it was since about a minute ago. Her confidence never faltering. “If you don’t give it to me...” Yuta’s hand unconsciously reached for his right pocket, where he usually put his phone. His fingers fumbling around a bit with the intention of keeping his phone save from the young girl who was threatening to do what Yuta did to hers.
Suddenly JiHo took a step forward and Yuta braced, ready to defend his phone. To his surprised the girl reached for his left pocket, which was when he realised his phone wasn’t in his right pocket to begin with. A victorious cheer left the girl’s lips as she held the now stolen phone in her hand.
“You won’t need this during practise later so let’s have it join my little friend on the ground. Sounds like a great plan right?” Before Yuta could protest, JiHo had already raised her arm and brought it down again with a huge swing. The phone was now skidding across the floor, leaving tiny pieces of glass in its wake. Both members looked at the way the phone came to a stop a few meters away from them.
Yuta now realised that he probably had reacted in a overdramatic way, because he should know fully well that JiHo could take care of herself. He just never saw someone being so disrespectful towards JiHo first hand. But he understood that he, himself, wasn’t being very respectful either with the way he talked to her and decided to throw her phone on the ground. He just wanted to protect her in the first place, yet he let his anger get the best of himself.
JiHo on the other hand felt a wave of guilt wash over herself as well. Up until the moment she asked for his phone, she felt like her feelings and words were justified, but grabbing Yuta’s phone and smashing it on the ground was a step too far. She understood that very well, but she still felt angry. He wasn’t being very fair at all. So although she felt like Yuta deserved everything she said and did, she still felt the guilt bubble up in her stomach.
“Wow~ What happened here?” The two turned around to see Mark and Jisung staring between them and then shattered phones with wide eyes. JiHo rolled her eyes, not in the mood to have any of her other members getting involved. She walked the other way, grabbing her phone - or at least what was left of it - with her.
“Noona-” Mark put a hand on Jisung shoulder signing to him that it was better to let the girl just walk away. Both young boys then turned to Yuta, their eyes making him fully aware that they wanted to hear what happened. “Hyung?” Mark pushed as he didn’t answer for a while. Yuta mimicked Jiho’s previous actions, but instead of walking the same way JiHo went, Yuta walked past the two boys. “Keep yourselves out of our business okay?” Mark and Jisung just wordlessly nodded, afraid to push any further.
“Mark hyung. Shouldn’t we do something?” Mark pushed his lips into a thin line and gave the younger boy a pat on the shoulder in an attempt to get him to stop worrying. “I don’t know Jisung-ah. Let’s just let them be. They love each other too much to stay mad at each other for long. I’m sure they’ll talk it through later.”
---
Side note: Since I’m posting less now this might be the last post of the week. I was planning to post it tomorrow, but I was too excited about this one ^^ Something I’m also excited about is Dream’s comeback. Only 5 more days!! LETS GOOO~~
Have a nice day/evening/night 🤍💚🤍
192 notes · View notes
uswntxfootball · 3 years
Text
wonderland (kristie mewis x uswnt!reader)
Tumblr media
all the memories and suppressed feelings flood back when she gets called up to the national team again.
word count: 2624 ish
rated D for dumb idiots. also F for flustered reader. and A for a little angsty.
——
it was tuesday morning when you had a near death experience.
jordan thinks that you’re being overdramatic but you don’t listen to her anyways.
on your off day of training the team decided to go out to have a nice breakfast together at a cafe.
there was the usual banter, disgusting couple moments (you constantly made gagging noises at them), and general stupidity.
after a bit the conversation dulled a little, but spiked again when jordan said:
“hey doesn’t the uswnt roster drop today?”
oh crap you forgot about that.
“oh crap yes it does.”
you were pretty sure you were going to make it again.
you’ve been very constant with your playing, scoring goals nationally and at the wsl alike.
still you couldn’t help the nerves that crept their way up your skin, and you handed your phone to jordan to have her read the list .
“read the list of midfielders aloud for me would you?”
the forward accepted it without hesitation, this being a usual exchange between the two of you.
jordan scanned the page a few times before smiling:
“i am proud to present the midfielders for the 2020 netherlands camp-“
“oh stop it just get on with it.”
“well i was before you rudely interrupted me-“
“alright whatever well keep going then.”
“julie ertz.”
“ditto.”
“lindsey horan.”
“also a given.”
“rose lavelle.”
“obviously.”
“catarina macario.”
“i’m not surprised.”
“sam mewis.”
“uh huh”
“and yours truly, y/n y/ln.”
the table cheered a little and you blushed, taking a bite of your avocado toast to hide your smile.
“oh and kristie mewis.”
and then you inhaled sharply, choking on your bite of food.
“who?” you managed to get out through a fit of coughing.
your inquiry was met with an array of exclamations.
“do you not know who kristie mewis is?”
“sam mewis’s sister?”
“won the challenge cup with dash?”
“dated rachel daly?”
“how do you not know who she is?!”
“you’re american for god’s sake!”
you ignored them all and instead said to jordan:
“can you hand me the water?”
jordan furrowed her eyebrows and handed you a glass of water as you coughed away.
you shot her a thankful glance before it was broken again by your nonstop coughing.
daan turned and slapped you a few times on the back which helped slightly.
for the rest of the breakfast jordan noticed you were much quieter, resorting to staring off into space instead of filling the silences with bad jokes.
after breakfast she caught up with you.
“alright spill.”
you shot her a look of confusion.
“spill about what?”
“you and kristie.”
“there’s nothing to spill.”
“that’s a lie and you know that.”
“i- hey would you look at the time i gotta go!”
you glanced at your wrist quickly before running off.
jordan shook her head before yelling out:
“you don’t even have a watch on!”
~~
steph watched the two of you and shook her head.
you and kristie were bickering about something across the field, too caught up in your own world to pay attention to the fact that training had ended.
steph and kristie were both boston college grads, and the two had been close friends before signing together.
kristie had taking a particular liking to you, and within the first week of training you found yourself included in everything the they did.
the three of you played for the boston breakers, sharing an apartment, a car, and consequently all your personal spaces as well.
and so it was only fitting that the three of you bickered.
a lot.
you and kristie more than anyone.
“that is the worst show in existence!”
“no it is not the cinematography is fantastic it’s-“
“no the acting is so bad!”
“no it’s not i-“
“you just have bad show choices.”
you gasped in offense.
“take it back.”
kristie grinned and stuck her tongue out at you.
“never.”
“well then you better run.”
kristie’s eyes widened when you lunged at her.
she took off but you, being faster tackled her to the ground.
your fingers dug into her sides and through a fit of laughter she relented.
“okay okay! i take it back! you have good taste in shows!”
you grinned triumphantly and stopped, your hands on both sides of kristie’s head as you looked down at her.
kristie’s cheeks were flushed and her chest heaved slightly as she looked up at you.
you were briefly aware of the pounding in your ears and butterflies in your stomach.
your eyes locked onto hers and unbeknownst to you you were leaning in but kristie was very, very aware of it, and just as she was about to lean in as well, steph’s yell broke the two of you out of your trance.
“hey training is over idiots!”
you shoot up so fast that your vision goes a little bit black.
you stumble a little bit before finding your balance.
“shut up mccaffrey you almost gave me a heart attack.”
you look down to see kristie still on the ground before you stick a hand out to help her up.
“what were the two of you even fighting about?”
you gave kristie a pointed look before saying:
“this idiot said my show choice was bad.”
steph thought about it for a minute.
“well i mean she isn’t wrong.”
kristie lets out an exclamation after hearing that.
“see?! i told you!”
“hey! you took it back!”
“doesn’t mean it isn’t true!”
“i’m being bullied.”
“oh shut up y/n.”
~~
adjusting your mask and sunglasses, you made your way out of the plane with a few of your teammates.
you had just landed in the netherlands, and coming from england you had a shorter flight compared to most of the team, who would be landing in an hour or so.
you were brimming with excitement at meeting up with your us teammates, as you hadn’t seen them since the beginning of the pandemic.
even then you didn’t get to see them often as you played in the wsl.
you had signed with arsenal in 2017, after the league folded and the boston breakers disbanded, as you were done with the american soccer system.
england had welcomed you with open arms, and you soon made a home there, flying back every so often for national team camps and games.
so when the pandemic hit and a handful of your teammates signed for international clubs, you were ecstatic.
even if they signed for opposing teams.
at least none of them signed for chelsea.
christen gave you a little tap when she saw your suitcases, and you gave her a thankful look before going to grab them.
when everyone was settled, you made your way to the bus and set off on your way to the hotel.
“sam how excited are you that kristie is coming?”
your head snapped up at the mention of the midfielder’s name, an action sam noticed but didn’t comment on.
“i’m so happy! she’s happy too on being called back and can’t wait to see her old teammates again!”
your cheeks flushed a little when sam’s eyes met yours at the end of her statement, and you suddenly found the ground very interesting.
it was a little later when you arrived at the hotel and rose kicked your foot that you looked up.
making your way into the hotel was an interesting experience.
on one hand you were beyond excited that you were back with the national team, yet on the other hand the prospect of seeing kristie made you want to throw up a little bit.
it’s not that you didn’t want to see her.
you were nervous because you liked? like? her.
of course this you realized way after you had left the us.
or rather, just as you were about to leave.
~~
you stood, heart racing as you stood in front of kristie’s door.
your hand hovered above it for a little bit as you tried to swallow and breathe normally.
you had already told steph and the rest of your friends but why was it so much harder to tell kristie?
were you afraid of what she was going to say?
that you were going to leave the country, leave the nwsl, and leave her?
you take a deep breath to calm down and you gave it a little knock.
the door flies open in less than a second.
“y/n! what are you doing here?”
kristie’s cheery demeanor rattled you a little bit.
upon seeing your face she frowned.
“what’s wrong?”
“i-“
your mouth was so dry and it trembled a little.
you could feel your heartbeat in your ears, tears threatening to spill.
kristie’s looking at you with a face full of worry now, and you couldn’t get the words out.
“i-“
you close your mouth again and take a second to look at her.
noting the ways her eyes sparkled and the way her hair was falling out from her bun in little curls over her shoulders.
and then it comes out in a hushed whisper when you least expect it.
“i’m moving to england.”
kristie looks at you too stunned to speak.
she whispers:
“when are you leaving?”
you look down at the ground.
“tomorrow.”
you keep your eyes trained on the ground, too scared to look up at her, knowing that when you look at her the tears you’ve fought so hard to hold back are going to spill.
the silence that falls between you is too heavy. too thick. too constricting.
you find yourself lunging forward towards the midfielder, wrapping her in a hug as the tears spill.
“i’m so sorry i didn’t tell you sooner.”
kristie doesn’t say anything.
she just hugs you harder.
you break away when you have to, but as soon as you turn kristie grabs your wrist.
you turn to ask her what’s wrong but her lips are on yours in an instant.
before you can even process what happened she pulls back.
“you’re going to kill it in england.”
and then she walks into the apartment and shuts the door.
~~
ironically you walk into a door when you see her.
to be fair it wasn’t your fault.
it was hers.
well maybe it was yours.
your head had been all over the place in the past few days, ever since the prospect of seeing her was brought up.
when you had left five years ago, you couldn’t help but replay that kiss over and over in your head.
you couldn’t believe all the signs you had missed.
so yeah.
you were nervous.
and so with music blasting in your headphones, you were prepping for a run, and subsequently not paying any attention to where you were walking and she opens the door right in your face.
you stumble a little bit backwards, before falling down.
you haven’t even looked up, instead sitting on the ground rubbing your forehead and cursing.
it’s when a pair of sneakers appears in front of you that you look up.
and you actually choke on air.
before you stood the woman you had been thinking about, sporting an amused smile and quirked eyebrow.
she says something you don’t hear and it’s only when she leans down and takes your headphones off that you notice them.
your cheeks flush and you mutter an embarrassed “oops” which elicited a chuckle from the midfielder in front of you.
she extends her hand out to you and you take it, sparks shooting up your arm at the contact.
she pulls you into a hug and the two of you quickly fall into conversation.
here up close, you can spot all the changes and similarities of the girl you left 5 years ago.
the five years had been great to her, she was now even more breathtaking than before, no longer the awkward kid but a gorgeous woman.
she almost looks like a completely different person.
almost.
but you notice the same ways her eyes sparkle when she talks, the way the corners of her mouth tug up slowly when she smiles, and the way she tucks loose strands of hair behind her ear and you know this is the same girl you were so smitten with 5 years ago.
“you done checking me out now?”
your gaze snaps back up to her face and blush, a little surprised by her statement.
kristie gives you a teasing smile before saying:
“come on i’m just joking.”
she even has the audacity to wink at you.
and this behavior continues.
for the whole training camp she flirts with you.
you’re a little taken aback by the confidence in the girl.
with the constant winking and flirting and fleeting touches you’re pretty sure she’s trying to kill you.
“y/n. y/n!”
sonnett’s voice snaps your gaze back onto her face.
“sorry what?”
“you were so far into la la land i almost had to get ryan gosling to come get you.”
you shoot her an annoyed look.
“oh shut up no.”
your eyes drift back to the other side of the field, to where kristie was.
sonnett rests her chin on your shoulder and says:
“so who are we checking out today?”
you turn to her and scowl.
“no one.”
“you’re no fun.”
“no.”
“come on you love me.”
“no.”
~~
and of course she scores.
of course.
no matter how hyped the game was.
or how difficult the netherlands defense was.
of course she scores.
she had been on for less than two minutes when she did so too.
you’re so excited you almost trip over your own feet.
she runs to you and you catch her as she jumps, and soon the rest of the team comes to envelop the two of you in a hug.
“i’m so fucking proud of you,” you whisper, and when everyone has relaxed a little, she kisses you.
it’s firmer and more insistent than the one from five years ago.
it’s almost like she knows what she wants and what you want.
you pull away after a few seconds, but only because you have a game to win still.
“come on kris let’s kick some ass.”
you let go of her and the two of you make your way back to your positions.
a few of your arsenal teammate shoot you teasing glances, and you blush when you meet them.
and when the whistle blows thirty minutes later, they make sure to tease you about it after the game.
you see kristie walking towards you and you grin, but before she gets there sam steps in front of you.
you look up at her, and when she doesn’t speak you fill the silence.
“i promise not to hurt her.”
sam quirks an eyebrow and leans in to whisper:
“you better not. or i will tear off your arm and beat you with i-“
“sam!”
kristie gives her sister a little slap in the arm before pulling you away with her.
“hey.”
“um h-hey,” you stammer, rubbing your neck nervously.
“you’re so cute.”
you blush a bit, your heart racing.
kristie catches your hand when it comes down and intertwines her fingers with yours.
“go on a date with me?”
you blush even harder and nod enthusiastically, not trusting your voice at this point.
she gives you a look before leaning in and connecting her lips with yours.
“hey please don’t bang my sister on the field!”
433 notes · View notes
life-rewritten · 3 years
Text
TRUE BEAUTY; TRUE TRAUMAS AND UNSETTLING REGRESSIONS
Tumblr media
The anger, the anguish, and upset I feel from the last moments of episode 10 are unspeakable. I can not believe how flawed and disgusting some of the parents are in this show. And I'm not particularly eager to write when I'm emotional and entirely overtaken by anger and sadness, but I also wanted to address immediately because this essay isn't about the love triangle. I couldn't give a hoot about the love triangle; I don't care what side people are on, because I think it's ridiculous that, that's what people came out of this week's episodes and focusing on. Like really, we're still doing this Suho vs Seojun nonsense, like make it make sense? Like no one is perfect, no one is a monster, all of them are just characters and yes Suho is problematic, Seojun also is, Jukyung this week was even more so, everybody likes to focus on their bias and forget that it's not that deep, it's okay to call out Suho on his mistakes but to sit there and fangirl about Seojun as the best hero boyfriend or whatever, when this episode had so much more depth to it, that's ridiculous. Anyway everyone is free to have their own opinions, but I can't believe that this tag is still full of Suho hate, absolutely absurd.  Back to the actual focus of this essay, what can I say True Beauty has always been about PTSD, trauma and the pain and suffering of our main characters, how that has shaped them, changed their mindsets on themselves, hindered them from growth, love and happiness. In Episode 9 and 10 all our characters with masks apart from Seojun who just kept growing regressed and fell apart because of past reminders of their traumas. Let me explain more as we get into it.
Tumblr media
First of all, one of the most critical vital themes of this episode is about Secrets, especially how secrets can cause disconcert, miscommunication and chaos. All of the characters hold some kind of secret from their respective partners, family, friends, etc., and in hiding these secrets, they lose their positive attributes because of how stressed they are by the secrets, how ashamed they feel from the secrets and how afraid they are about what the reveal of the secrets would cause. Most importantly, we see Suho, Soojin and Ju Kyung spiral into regression because of the consequences of their masks and secrets.
Tumblr media
Ju Kyung: A flashback to the past
Truthfully I was very peeved of by Ju Kyung these two episodes, but I mean it's evident that this was going to happen as mentioned before, Ju Kyung has severe PTSD from her past with bullying and suffering because the world made her feel inadequate and worthless because of what she lacks. Although Kyung ends up with someone who completely sees her for who she is, is supportive and by her side completely, Kyung can't help but question this blessing as a curse. This is what self hate, and self-deprecation does, immediately she receives something good for her, Kyung starts to withdraw in fear because some part of her can't believe she deserves to be happy and satisfied with Suho. Now, as I said, I was annoyed, but also I saw her reasons loud and clear and I understood them because I related to them as well. Let's first look at the situation that occurs to cause her to spiral.
Her secret is that she's dating Suho. Pause. Now at first she's hesistant because of the fear of bullying and being noticed and being pushed into the spotlight because of his reputation. However, because of him being him, taking care of her, making her feel brave and loving herself (he does so much to show her she's okay being her self), she decides she doesn't care if the secret is out. Unfortunately for Kyung, another secret is revealed; Soojin her new best friend someone, who she's so close to has feelings for Suho. In fact, she also has really fascinating and important reasons for why she believes Suho should be hers. Now, this is what truly causes Kyung's trauma to appear again, and she becomes a mess of emotions because she has spiralled back into self-hate and self-deprecation. Let me explain.
Tumblr media
Losses and Fears
In order to understand why Kyung's trauma is actually more profound than it seems because it does feel quite dramatic and unimportant with the reveal of other people's secrets and situations, her crying about Suho not understanding her and why she's struggling seems really overdramatic and not needed. But let me take you back to episode 1, Kyung has been in this situation before, and this situation led her to want to take her life. Let's review
Tumblr media
In episode 1,  Kyung was confident and happy in her self; she had a crush on a guy who made her smile, comfortable, and one of the people who paid attention to her and cared for her. Now this guy she had feelings for, as she confessed; she discovered he had feelings for another person, someone more prettier, popular and matched for him as people put it. This led to her confession with this guy bringing out the worst side of him; it led to her also losing her best friend who she relied on because she went to the popular girl out of fear, it led to her being taunted and broken by people making her feel like how dare she even think she could confess. You have to realise what they're saying to her, one she's not worth having a guy pay attention to her because of her looks, two she shouldn't try even to get someone's attention because the right person will find that person and they'll realise their mistake in associating with her, three, friendship and people are fickle, and she'll always be alone if she tries to do what she wants.
Tumblr media
So back to our situation, Kyung has finally found a safe space. The beginning of episode 9 she reveals one of her secrets (part of her growth) to Soojin who completely protects and stays by her side. Soojin becomes the best friend she could ever have, she relies on her and is happy because of her. So she's regained a new best friend, but also she's found, love. A guy has thoroughly chosen to be with her despite her looks and whatnot (she thinks), this guy is a complete package, he's a prince, he's too good to be true, he protects, he's warm, and he makes her feel safe. (Just like the other guy did), lastly, she's also now found a place with her peers, she's no longer looked down on, and everyone likes her. There's a lot in her mind at stake if she chooses to reveal to Soojin the truth. It just makes her vulnerable, and it makes her more likely to lose everything, she finally regained by wearing her mask. It makes her return to that mindset in episode 1, where she felt she was worthless, and useless, a burden, and she should take her life. So her trauma is ingrained in her and causes her to spiral into self-doubt, fear, and hate just because she's gone through this before.
Tumblr media
Lies and Masks
Now the past situation made her feel one thing; people are fickle. No matter how much Suho is here for her and says he wants her, his love is fickle. It can change, he just needs to find the right person, the smarter person, the prettier person, the more affluent person who matches him. Soojin is that. But even more from what Soojin is saying to her, Suho is just exactly like how he is with Kyung. He's protective, he's apparently warm, and he goes out of his way to make Soojin feel safe when he doesn't do that for anyone. In her head, he just hasn't realised he wants her the same way he wants Kyung cause she makes him care. And we all know what happened when someone else found another opportunity where the girl of his dreams wanted him, the cruel words he said, the way he pushed her away, Kyung feels like Suho has every right to do the same because she feels like she's not in his league. Because people; her mum, her bullies, her ex-friends, even strangers have made her feel like she's not meant to be perfect for him because she's dumb, ugly and has nothing to offer apart from makeup. And that's just painful and heartbreaking. What is she to do in this situation, losing Soojin is already painful because that's someone who she also holds in high regards in her life, someone who she depends on as a friend.
But it's not just that. As I said, she believes people's love and care for her is fickle. Actually, Soojin is proving her right without her knowing, Soojin isn't being a good friend. She's going behind the scenes to manipulate Kyung, making her feel listless knowing she's dating Suho. But the issue is Soojin also knows her without her mask, her deepest fears, her deepest secret, she has a weapon if Kyung tells her she's dating Suho. If Soojin switches, Kyung reverts back to her episode 1 self where the whole school sides with the popular girl, and she reveals the truth about how she looks without makeup. She loses not just her best friend but also her new safe space and she regresses back into the girl on the rooftop broken and exhausted of being alive.
Tumblr media
Real vs Fake
And that's the painful thing because the reason why Kyung believes people are on her side is because of her mask of makeup and beauty, Suho thinks he likes her because she is pretty with her makeup at least, Soojin became her friend because she felt she was different and prettier, and people in the school rate her high because she's pretty. It's all about how much her mask has helped her be reborn as she said to Selena. But because she knows her mask isn't real, these people's feelings, and loyalty, friendship also isn't real, she has to keep up this facade to keep it accurate, and to stay in this lie she's created as long as she's safe, happy and able to walk around freely being her self. Something people refused her to do before because she had no right to be satisfied being ugly and dumb. So you see it's actually genuinely traumatic and painful what she's dealing with.
Tumblr media
However, the painful thing about the fickleness of feelings is that Kyung has Suho and Suho has been in love with her and has been consistent with his care for her from the time he knew her without her mask. Since they were kids. Suho spent the whole episodes being grateful that he had her as his girlfriend, wanting to show her to the world, wanting to be with her, and Kyung's need to keep secrets was pushing his feelings, and his fears and his worries aside because she was more focused on prevention and protection. Now Suho doesn't care for other people or see other people the way he sees Kyung, for him Soojin is barging into his life without needing to be there, he told her this, but he doesn't see it as a big issue to tell Kyung she's there because she's not important. But Seojun is important, Seojun has already told him how he feels for Kyung, and Kyung seems pretty reliant and close to Seojun who keeps crossing the line sometimes (like coming to her house and staying when her boyfriend is there, competing and what not) this is what causes him to get agitated and tell her the way he knows how. 
Tumblr media
He's had no parental care, no training, no nurturing to know what's wrong and right, he's been forced to deal with his issues on his own, and he isolated himself from people, we can see he struggles with relationships, and he's trying to navigate it. So it's not okay for him to act possessive and controlling over who she should be with, but it also makes sense with his character when he doesn't know how to show emotions appropriately, and he's jealous and worried because she's being happy and close with Seojun in one corner and avoiding his calls and him in the other. It doesn't make sense. This is what I was peeved off at her for. Both Kyung and Suho are in the wrong in this situation, not just Suho.
Tumblr media
Speaking of Suho, let's talk about this episode, his secrets as Leo and the reveal of how Seoyeon got set up.
Tumblr media
Suho; A memory of regrets
Now the frustrating thing about this situation is; I can't fathom humans that do this, I can't understand how cold and heartless someone can be that he drives someone to take their life, and he still acts nonchalant and cold about that person because he doesn't care about rookies. Suho's father is incredibly disgusting as a human, and I completely can't stand him. The reveal that Seoyeon's demise was because he wanted to cover up a dating scandal, his son's best friend, who his son is literally suffering PTSD because he believed he was the reason his friend jumped. It's so disgusting when you think about it. This episode does an excellent job in showing us how much Suho has struggled with emotions and life because of his father's reputation, personality, and upbringing. And that's why I don't understand how people can come into this episode and come out with hate for Suho. Make it make sense.
The first thing episode 9 shows about Suho, which was actually foreshadowing the final conflict in episode 10 is his lack of a fatherly figure despite the fact he had a father. We see him interact with his father when he goes to have dinner with Soojin's own disgusting family, and we realise this is all his father does for him. He makes little quips about why he and Suho can't spend time together, and we all know Suho holds resentment at his father for cheating and sleeping with women, but also the trauma he had from dealing with paparazzi because of his father's fame, and the fact his father was barely in his life to show him emotional support and care. This is even worse when you realise again why Seoyeon got set up because his father wanted to protect his reputation, to sleep with someone, and because he didn't care about people's emotions and wellbeing.
Tumblr media
Warmth and Comfort
Now the only thing that helped him deal with his father at first was Seoyeon and Seojun; it's making me cry again. The thing that got him through his tough upbringing was his friends, they brought purpose through music (another secret he's Leo), they brought happiness and care through friendship, and they brought comfort through their presence. They were loyal, close, and ready to help each other no matter what. His father took that away from him. Not just took that away from him but broke his mindset about how he views himself, damaged his relationship and trust with people, and pulled him into a spiral of self hate and self deprecation and regrets because he set Seoyeon up. How messed up can someone be? It's even worse because he knows he's the reason why Suho lost his friend, and he still had the guts, the confidence, the heart to plagiarise the person he ruined's song. Even not knowing that his son is the one he's plagiarising from.  His father took it all from him. He made Suho think he's a burden, his reputation is a curse, and he's doomed to be alone to protect people away from him. It's funny because this is how Kyung also feels in her own regression. Both Suho and Kyung believe that they shouldn't be worth interacting with people because they're burdens and problematic for just being born. For Suho it's being born into his family, for Kyung it's being born with her looks and brains.  It's incredibly heartbreaking and frustrating.
Tumblr media
That's why it's even more painful because episode 9, Suho gets to stay in a lie for a while with Kyung's father staying with him, showing him the warmth, care and support he didn't have with his father. That's why we got that scene; it was to make you compare how different Suho's father is to him, compared to a flawed father like Kyung who's a headache but is also a good source of comfort and love. Suho finally got to feel that care that he was lacking. But still, Suho's father's coldness and heartlessness also shadow to let us know why Suho is the way he is when he has a go at Kyung and tells her to stop hanging out with Seojun; when he is posessive and protective over her without listening to what she's saying. He hasn't had a significant role model/ influence to look up to. He also became like his father on the surface and withdrawn from emotions because he doesn't receive that. It's honestly upsetting. I am so angry at Suho's father.
Regrets and Resent
But let's talk about the regression. Suho finding out his father is the one who caused Seoyeon's demise. First of all, just think about how much Suho has suffered the past ten episodes because of this issue, he's had PTSD, actual PTSD, panic attacks, depression, anxiety, isolation, just because of this issue, because Seojun told him repeatedly he was the reason for why Seoyeon jumped. Because his reputation could not save Seoyeon, because he didn't answer the phone because of his callousness and also because he fought with the very reason for why this happened; his father.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Seojun made Suho feel like he was a monster, and he was never going to be any different because his father was his father. And the thing is, this has been going for a long time, Seojun kept showing up in Suho's life ensuring he never got to be happy (at the beginning not now), he never got to feel worthy of peace, love, friendship because of what he did to Seoyeon. In a way, if you actually think about Seojun's role in Suho's life for a while, he's been like the bullys who ensured Kyung didn't feel happy being her self the way she was because of how she looked. Now he's not as bad because he's not doing it purposely with that intention of psychological harm and breakdown, because he also doesn't think Suho feels any guilt or issue with Seoyeon's demise. But it's pretty messed up that the person everyone is hailing to be this perfect specimen was literally playing the same roles as the bullies you claim to hate in Suho's life.
Like I keep repeating all these characters are flawed, have made mistakes because they're human, but the hate and the bias towards some of them is insane and makes no sense to me.
Tumblr media
But now Suho has entirely as Kyung went back to a flash to the past, he's spiralled again into self hate, self deprecation and trauma because he found out the truth. If he's already been struggling with not answering the phone to help Seoyeon; imagine how much of a monster he'll feel because it's his dad who set Seoyeon up to fail. Imagine the pain and suffering, the self-hate, the same things Seojun kept telling him will keep repeating in his head, his reputation hurts people, his dad hurts people, and his lifestyle hurts people. He shouldn't be loved, have friends, or have people around him because he doesn't deserve that when they can end up like Seoyeon. All of his bottled down secret; self-hate is now released because the reason is connected to him from the start, it was his father. So Kyung and Suho found themselves with their masks unveiled, broken and scared and terrified about the consequences of choosing to be happy and free. Now, both of them hold this burden and weight making them feel like they don't deserve to want to be happy, in love and confident in what they deserve because of what society has done to them. And that's insane.
Tumblr media
Soojin- A journey of a villain 
Before I stop, we also need to speak about Soojin and her regression. Her regression is very fascinating and upsetting. I have been on edge about her character, and it was excruciating to see her become manipulative, sly and a full second lead this episode. But what can I say. It was going to happen. Soojin's secrets revealed this episode to Kyung is about the abuse she suffers, we also see a snippet again of her fathers sexist, heartless mindset about controlling her to ensure she makes the grades. We also see her regress back to hand washing and self-harm because of the news that Suho is dating Kyung. Now, her mindset in the last episodes have been noticing the warmth, and comfort Suho brings into her life. There's no one else who sees her, knows her, and can protect her without her mask. Suho has known her for ten years. They've been each other's support system to deal with their family, now for Suho, he cut the importance of her presence in his life because he pushed everyone away after, but for her, Suho has been a consistent person to rely on.
Tumblr media
A safe space
Kyung showing up and making Suho open and caring made her feel fear and anxiety that the only source of happiness and warmth was being taken away from her. Suho is the only thing that makes her breath, everything else is a mask that makes her feel suffocated, even her friendships; she's not been her real self with them, she's been a perfectionist. Even her revealing her truth to Kyung this episode wasn't for friendship but for emotional manipulation, and it wasn't right. Like Kyung, Soojin regresses because she's afraid to go back to who she has to be without Suho's presence, which is protection, warmth and care compared to her actual home, cold, harsh and volatile. She had to latch onto something to stay sane and to stop breaking down. Suho, unfortunately, is what she latched onto. And it is a regression on her part because Kyung is her best friend, she's emotionally manipulating and hurting her best friend to make her self feel good and get what she wants.
Still, she's not even getting what she wants because Suho isn't going to pay attention to her apart from protecting her from her father as someone should do. Soojin has been a girls girl, supportive, protective, and kind to everyone she meets but now she's regressed to being petty, conniving and mean to her own friends because she can't lose her own safe space. Kyung regressed not to lose her safe space and for Soojin her safe space became Suho. Her regression is really unsettling because how far would she go to keep her safe space, and how far will she sacrifice Kyung's wellbeing and emotions for her own gain. She's dangerous because she knows Kyung's secret, she can unload the truth about Kyung pettily and get some kind of one up on her, which is sad because she's slowly regressing into those bullies that made Kyung's life hell.
Tumblr media
Volatile Mindsets
In fact, she shadows like I said the popular girl in episode 1, she wants to get her way, and she feels slighted by Kyung taking it away from her. Also her self esteem, her ego is being bruised because she's meant to be the one for Suho as society keeps telling her, she's the prettiest, the smartest, his equal, why would he choose Kyung who is so far not that close to her level in any way. These are the kind of thoughts that happens when trauma makes you regress. Whilst Suho and Kyung are regressing into self-hate, and self deprecation Soojins regression is the opposite direction, it's regressing into self privilege and self-obsession, it's unfortunate.
There's so much more about this episode that we can discuss like I said everyone has a secret, but when it comes to these three, their secrets and unfortunate reveals causes them to spiral into a whirl of self-hate and pain, trauma and suffering. This has been building up for a while because their mindsets have been shaped and made this way because of all the hurts and attacks by society to them, not just society that affects them this way; with these three family affects them this way, Kyung's mum, Suho's dad, and Soojin's dad their nonchalant, and cold attitudes towards their children cause them to feel unstable and worthless, and also friends also causes them to spiral this way, For Kyung, Soojin has brought back a lot of fear and anxiety about where her life is going, and Seojun's past problematic actions have returned along with Suho's guilt to make him also spiral into self-hate and regret. Kyung, Soojin's best friend, has caused her to lose her safe space. These characters have been pushed into this by people they thought they could rely on, and that's what painful.
Tumblr media
Anyway, if anyone wants to know my opinions on this love triangle,  I appreciate Seojun he's a great second lead. Still, he's not the one for Kyung or the right person as people keep trying to say, he and Suho are still equal on terms with who she should be with. The person she cares about is Suho; the person she loves/wants is Suho. She's not thought of Seojun in that way so respect it. There is so much more going on in this show than this love triangle, so much more to discuss and fight for, each character is human and makes their mistakes, but they're all so understandable and relatable, and the pain they suffer is just insane, the psychological trauma they all hold is too much to bare, and I really hope they find their way out of this. Because right now, Suho is not going to be okay, and Kyung is in danger of her past finding her.  I'm scared for them so much. This stuff may seem overdramatic and chaotic but with trauma and pain, and self-hate and psychological distress, it's not easy to overcome emotional abuse, trauma and mindsets that make you feel you're not meant to be alive, and all these characters are going through that. And it's so painful. Let's hope we find a way out of this: love triangle or no love triangle.
236 notes · View notes
trynatalktou · 3 years
Note
Chayenzo prompt: flirty Luca and jealous Vincenzo 👀
Thankk uu
This was prompted to me more than a week ago but I was waiting for today's episode. We were robbed quite frankly.
Also for the sake of understanding, let's pretend both Cha-young and Luca are fluent in english while Vincenzo is profusely not.
I think there is something uniquely comic about a trio where they don't all speak the same languague but, simultaneously, where any pair combination can communicate to each other.
Especially in a show with the Tower of Babel symbolism such as Vincenzo.
ao3
The one where Luca arrives earlier than expected.
‘’Vincenzo Cassano는 어디에서 찾을 수 있습니까?’’ speaks the robotic voice on his phone, echoing through the corridors of Geumga Plaza.
The man in front of him - the one who attempted to sound stern in broken english merely seconds ago - breaks into a grin.
‘’Mr.Consigliere?’’
Luca is taken back for a moment but ultimately nods. It seems that, after all, Vincenzo truly made more allies here than even himself could have expected.
The man continues in equally broken italian, speaking a pastiche of a phrase that originally intended to mean i’’Follow me! Mr. Cassano is not yet here but you can wait for him in Ms. Hong’s office.’’
And surely enough, located at the end of the corridor - there it was - the Jipuragi law firm, owned by the one and only Miss Hong Cha-young. Oh, Luca has heard about her alright, quite an absurd amount considering it came from the words of one Vincenzo Cassano - particularly when every so often these words would sound so strikingly like gushing- not that he has ever dared to tell him that.
They were received promptly at the door by a man with glasses - recognizing him to be Mr. Nam, their paralegal - Luca quickly presented himself with the best korean pronunciation he could manage after picking up a thing or two from his friend and boss.
It was followed by loud gasps.
‘’Luca?’’ Three voices said in unison.
He turned his head around to capture the origin of the third voice. And saw the very woman he was wondering about stumble around to get to them - huh, she is certainly cute.
‘’Welcome Luca, my name is Hong Cha-young, it’s a pleasure to meet you. These are Mr. Nam, our paralegal and Mr. Ahn, our personal secret agent.’’ she says in perfect english, extending one hand for him to shake it and motioning vaguely to the pair with the other.
He takes her hand and bows to the other two simultaneously, making his position slightly awkward.
‘’Sorry, I am not used to the korean way of greeting just yet.’’ He apologizes, facing her again.
‘’It’s quite alright, this handshake seems to be perfectly adequate.’’ She responds playfully.
‘’Your english is quite good, Cha-young-’’ he watches her eyes widen ‘’Oh, I’m sorry, I completely forgot, you see in Italy the first-name basis is given out more freely, I’m sorry for overstepping-’’
‘’Don’t worry, it’s fine really.’’ She interrupts him ‘’I called you Luca after all - it is just that I’m not very used to it.’’ she laughs weakly ‘’but you can call me Cha-young, I don’t personally mind it.’’ she finishes by winking at him exaggeratedly.
He laughs.
‘’I’ve heard quite a lot about you, Cha-young’’. He says cautiously.
‘’What can I say, my reputation precedes me.’ she simply shrugs ‘’bearing in mind your source, may I assume it’s all bad?’’
‘’It’s all good.’’
Cha-young beams; turning to Mr. Nam and Mr. Ahn - who were until this very moment only ping ponging their eyes between the two of them (unable to comprehend a word) - and says something in korean; they share a few words back and forth not long before both of them end up nodding and following their ways, while she leads Luca to a reunion table.
‘’ Luca, would you like anything to drink?’’
‘’No, I’m fine, thank you.’’
She plops on the chair across from him, sipping her coffee and eyeing him significantly.
‘’So,’’ she starts.
‘’So’’ he responds.
‘’What could possibly bring all the way from Italy, Luca?’’
‘’I’m not sure if I am allowed to tell you that.’’
‘’Of course, secretive mafia business, I get it - you see, I may actually know Mr.Cassano better than you might think.’’
He snorts ‘’Somehow, I don’t doubt it.’’
‘’Is there something you know that I don’t, Luca?’’
‘’Perhaps it is the contrary-’’ he pauses contemplative, before continuing ‘’may I ask what is your relationship with Vincenzo?’’
She almost expectorates her coffee out.
‘’Excuse me!’’ she splutters flushing ‘’ What is your relationship with Mr. Cassano?’’
Luca raises his arms to express surrender, he seems frightened enough just by the look in her eyes. She enjoys it greatly.
‘’Well, he is my boss.’’
Cha-young smirks.
‘’And I’m his boss.’’ she tilts her head ‘’Well, sort of.’’
Luca can’t help but dare to smile. ‘’ So may I perhaps ask how long have you known about the whole ‘’secretive mafia business?’’ he air quotes the last words, echoing her.
‘’You sure are full of questions for a mafia man, Mr. Luca.’’
‘’What can I say? You intrigue me Ms. Cha-young.’’
‘’You wouldn’t happen to be flirting with me right now, would you?’’ she says overdramatically, blinking her eyes in rapid succession way too many times.
One for the theatrics as well.
‘’I’m afraid not, I happen to like my head exactly where it sits on my neck’’ he replies with a tone slightly more serious.
‘’I’m not sure I get it’’ she retorts innocently.
‘’I think you do.’’
She blushes prettily.
‘’How come he is not as forward about it then?’’
‘’Maybe, he needs a little push.’’
Both look up at that - only to find an undeniable mischievousness in each other’s eyes.
‘’Maybe he does.’’
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………
When Vincenzo arrives at Jipuragi much later, he is not exactly surprised to see Luca there - the man had sent him a text about his connection change - although he can’t say the same for the way that he found Cha-young and Luca giggling together as if they were childhood friends.
He suppresses a smile.
‘’Luca’’ Vincenzo greets loudly. ‘’È passato così tanto tempo, amico mio (It has been so long my friend)’’.
‘’Vincenzo!’’ Luca responds, getting up to embrace his friend. ‘’è bello vederti’’ (it’s good to see you).
Cha-young says something in english, which Luca answers by a subtle roll of his eyes.
Huh.
‘’I see you already made your acquaintance with Ms. Hong’’ he said, considerably more formally than he meant.
‘’Oh yes, Cha-young is quite lovely.’’ he smiles.
‘Cha-young’, he suppresses a scoff, well isn’t that just lovely.
‘’We got to talk quite a bit before you arrived, it seems that we have a lot in common.’’
‘’Oh, is that so?’’
Luca visibly winces at Vincenzo’s bitter tone, but nonetheless, turns himself towards Cha-young and speaks a phrase in english. She bites her lip.
‘’Mr. Cassano.’’ she starts tentatively in korean ‘’I mean, you know that I have do a weak spot for handsome men. Do you think you can set me up?’’
‘’Absolutely not.’’ he snaps ‘’Long-distance relationships are unfortunately not his thing.’’ he finishes hotly. And to his utmost delight - they proceed by sharing, yet again, a few sentences in english. Vincenzo has never wished to have paid more attention to his stupid classes in school than right at this moment.
‘’May I join you both on your conversation?’’ Vincenzo asked snarkily.
Cha-young is quick on her feet.
‘’I was just translating what we said, and besides, what basis do you have to be so upset about it? We also have a right to communicate.’’
Vincenzo looks momentarily ashamed. ‘’It won’t happen again. It is just frustrating to be set apart from the conversation because of a language barrier.’’
‘’Well, don’t I know it.’’ she retorts
Vincenzo sends her his fakest smile.
Cha-young mirrors the expression.
Luca hides a grin.
+
Luca and Cha-young’s mini conversation in english.
1-’’So that’s how you guys greet in Italy, we ought to try it anytime
soon.’’
Luca answers by a roll of his eyes.
2- ‘’Well it wasn’t supposed to be this easy, quick, take the attention out of me.’’
Cha-young bites her lip in thought.
3- ‘’Whatever you said, I think you may have overdone it.’’
‘’I told him that I want a date with you.’’
‘’Glad to know you have no regards for my well-being.’’
‘’Should I say that I don’t care if it is something purely physical?.’’
‘’Glad to know you have have no regards for my life.’’
108 notes · View notes
jamespotterthefirst · 3 years
Note
Hi Bree! I enjoyed reading your headcannon of L&E's children! It was such a fun read, I'm hooked with their family life 🥰 Because of this, I got inspired to come up with a Q&A for the kiddos. The interview is set 12 years after Lilac & Ethan became new parents. You will be answering as the AllenSey kids (with special appearances of Lilac & Ethan, as well). Hope you enjoy 'em! x
For Jonah, Dolores, Jasmine & Violet:
• If someone gave you $100 what would you do with it?
• If you could change any rule, which one would it be?
• Where is your favorite place to go on vacation?
• Most likely to hide a stray pet?
• Most likely to tell a lie to get out of trouble?
• Most likely to steal their sibling's secret stash (food/toys/new stuff/etc.)?
• What do your mum & dad do in their free time?
• What is the one thing mum & dad is not good at?
• What do you admire most about mummy & daddy?
🧡
For Lilac & Ethan:
• What made you laugh today?
• Did someone get in trouble recently? If so, what happened?
• What are the hardest & easiest parts about parenting?
• What are the unexpected perks of parenthood?
• What advice would you give to younger versions of yourselves when you've just became new parents?
THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER THOUGH? I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU THANK YOU
For context, Jonah is 12, Dolores 9, and Violet and Jasmine are 6
For Jonah, Dolores, Jasmine & Violet:
• If someone gave you $100 what would you do with it?
Jasmine: Squishies!
Dolores: Yeah, so you'll stop stealing mine.
Jasmine: That was Violet.
Violet: I gave them back.
Dolores: After Minnie destroyed them.
Jonah: I would invest it.
Jasmine: What's ingest?
Jonah: Invest, like how Dad told us? That's why we have the beach house in Cape Cod?
Jasmine: I thought we had that because Dad owns the hospital?
Violet: Or because Mom is famous?
Jonah: *sighs* No, they double their money through compound interest when they invest.
Sisters: *stare blankly*
Jonah: Remember? When he sat us down that one time and explained the Rule of 72? If we take 72 and divide it by the annual interest rate, then we get the amount of years those $100 will double. So if I invest it at a rate of 5%, it will take 14 years to double.
Violet: ...
Jasmine: ...
Dolores: ... So you will be *counts with her fingers* 26 and have $200?
Jonah: Exactly.
Jasmine: *horrified* No, thank you. I want my money right now.
Jonah: If you invest--
Jasmine: I'm here for a good time, not a long time, big bro.
• If you could change any rule, which one would it be?
Dolores: The "no electronics after dinner" rule. I want to play Roblox with my friends before bed.
Jonah: I would change the "if you don't know how to operate it, leave it alone." Sometimes I want to break things apart and put them back together but Mom won't let me.
Violet: Leaving Jenner out in the yard during dinner is cruel. He's part of the family. He should be inside with us.
Dolores: Dad only made up that rule because you feed him half of your dinner.
Violet: Because he's a growing boy! He needs food.
Jasmine: I would change the "treat people and property with kindness or respect" rule. Sometimes I just want to kick a toy of my way after a long day--
Lilac: *throws her "the look" from the distance*
Jasmine: *falls silent*
• Where is your favorite place to go on vacation?
Jonah: Providence with Grandpa Alan. He always takes us to the zoo or WaterFire. It's so much fun.
Dolores: California with abuelitos and tia Laurel. They take us to Disneyland every time!
Jasmine: Not fair! Last time we went, we couldn't get on any rides.
Dolores: Because you two are literal babies?
Jasmine: At least I don't sound like one.
Violet: Or smell like one.
• Most likely to hide a stray pet?
*All of the siblings point at Dolores in unison*
Jasmine: She hid Minnie from Mom and Dad last year for a good week before they found out.
Jonah: And convinced them to let us keep her.
Violet: Dad isn't convinced yet.
Dolores: They're becoming friends! Minnie let him pet her for like two seconds the other day. Before she bit him. It was so funny.
• Most likely to tell a lie to get out of trouble?
*All of them point at Jasmine*
Jasmine: What? Dad said it reminds him of mom. He said she can talk her way out of getting arrested.
Jonah: Out of getting a ticket. They're different.
Dolores: Oh yeah, because the Policeman liked mom. Liked liked her.
Jasmine: Dad was not happy about that.
• Most likely to steal their sibling's secret stash (food/toys/new stuff/etc.)?
*They all point at Violet*
Violet: I give it back!
Jonah: After Mom makes you.
Jasmine: Or after Jenner, Minnie, or you break them.
Dolores: Yeah, Violent doesn't know her own strength.
• What do your mum & dad do in their free time?
Dolores: They love to drop us off at Aunt Sienna's and disappear all night.
Jasmine: We don't mind though because she always makes us the best chocolate chip cookies ever.
Violet: I like going to Uncle Elijah's. His video games are so cool.
Jonah: I like it at Uncle Bryce's. One time, he let me break their toaster apart and showed me how to put it back together.
Dolores: Yeah, Mom was not a fan of that.
• What is the one thing mum & dad is not good at?
Dolores: Dad is not a good liar.
*They all agree*
Jonah: I remember the time Jenner ripped the boots Tia Laurel had given Mom. He told us not to say anything.
Jasmine: Oh yeah, he said Mom wouldn't even notice.
Dolores: But then as soon as she got home, he panicked and asked her what size shoe she was. Then told her he was going to the store to buy something really quick.
Jonah: Mom figured it out right away.
• What do you admire most about mummy & daddy?
Dolores: That they're doctors.
Jonah: That they save lives.
Jasmine: That they own the hospital.
Violet: That they're famous.
🧡
For Lilac & Ethan:
• What made you laugh today?
Lilac: Probably Jonah explaining the Rule of 72 to his sisters.
Ethan: *proudly* Definitely. And the girls having none of it.
Lilac: Imagine what they'll say when they find out you once drew a one dollar salary.
Ethan: I will never live it down. I already get enough taunting from you. I'd never survive it if all four of them join in.
• Did someone get in trouble recently? If so, what happened?
Lilac: *nods solemnly* The usual suspects.
Ethan: Dolores and Jasmine.
Lilac: Jasmine somehow hacked into her Roblox account and deleted all her friends. It was a bloodbath.
• What are the hardest & easiest parts about parenting?
Ethan: Figuring out what the hell is Roblox?
Ethan: It's a delicate balance that is achieved through fairness and consistency.
Lilac: *laughing* This is why I had to take care of that incident.
Lilac: The hardest part of parenting is finding a balance between being a disciplinarian but also someone they can approach and trust. It's terrifying to think that in holding them accountable when they make a mistake, you risk them resenting you.
Lilac: The best part is definitely watching them become their own person, with distinct interests and personalities.
Ethan: Absolutely.
• What are the unexpected perks of parenthood?
Ethan: Having four extra pairs of hands to do chores around the house.
Lilac: *laughs and smacks his arm*
Ethan: *raising his brows at her* Don't tell me you don't enjoy not having to worry about dishes for the next 12 years?
Lilac: *scrunches nose* You're right. I don't miss those. It's no wonder you finally listened to my argument that the dishwasher wasn't the best way to get them clean.
Ethan: That's because we've acquired four little dish washers since.
• What advice would you give to younger versions of yourselves when you've just became new parents?
Lilac: Just try your best.
Ethan: Don't say "and have fun."
Lilac: What? It's true!
Ethan: My advice to our younger selves would be: "However scared or anxious you are feeling right now, I promise you... It's ten times worse."
Dr. Ramsey is just being overdramatic with the last one. He loves being a dad. OMG this was so fun! Thank you so much, my love!
60 notes · View notes