#nd
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I'm not autistic as far as I'm aware but if I ever get diagnosed with it I'm going to put this up on my wall
#sth#sonic#Sonic the hedgehog#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#shadow#sega#autism#nd#idk#my top posts
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If people in general can understand that someone watching a horror movie might jump in their chair, have their heart rate go up, and feel nervous, even though there is no actual threat in the room, then why can't they understand the same is true for people experiencing psychosis?
They are similar, you are seeing something that isn't actually real, you may believe it's real or not, but either way you will react as if it were real because your brain can't help it. The difference is the person in psychosis isn't seeing it through the safety of a screen, isn't prepared for it and can't immediately turn it off if they want to.
So why is it so hard for people to understand why people in psychosis will react like they are actually experiencing something? Anyone would jump back if an elephant suddenly appeared in front of them. Or be very nervous if they hear their name called when they are home alone. So why are people in psychosis expected to not react, or stop reacting when someone tells them it isn't real?
It really shows a lack of sympathy from people who haven't experienced psychosis, for them to expect us to not have reactions. We are expected to somehow suppress our brains natural reactions, simply for other people's comfort. This applies even more to people of color and homeless people. We are expected to fit the status quo, even when our brains are experiencing something as real.
I say all this to say, try to consider the experience of people with psychosis if you haven't. Don't gawk at people reacting to something you don't see. Try not to fear the homeless person talking to someone that isn't actually there. Don't make fun of, or judge people for reacting to something they are experiencing, just because you don't experience it.
#schizophrenia#mental illness#nd#neurodivergent#schizophrenic#psychosis#actuallyschizophrenic#mental health awareness#pseriouslypsychotic#hallucinations#delusions#schizophrenia awarness#psychosis awarness
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hey fun fact did you know that if you're on the schizophrenia spectrum, have psychosis, have psychotic symptoms or traits, etc, that you're loved and your symptoms and traits should not be vilainized or seen as evil or ugly?
#sam.txt#sam.neuro#psychosis#schizospec#schizophrenia spectrum#schizophrenia#szpd#stpd#neurodivergent#schizoid personality disorder#schizotypal personality disorder#schizoaffective#nd#persodivergent#interdivergent#positivity
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fuck it. shout out to "high functioning" neurodivergents
the ones who can mask easily, the ones who can get social cues, the ones who have managed to go most of their life not even knowing they were ND because they didn't present as the stereotypical ND person.
the ones who can pay attention in class, understand social etiquette, who understand societial expectations
the ones who don't feel neurodivergent enough bc they don't struggle in the same ways/areas a lot of NDs do, or they can't relate to other NDs' experiences because they always understood these things easily
the ones with high empathy, the ones who DO get the joke, the ones who are constantly told that they can't possibly be neurodivergent because they don't act like what you'd expect a neurodivergent person to act like.
you are neurodivergent enough. you are valid, and so are your experiences. not struggling as much as others do in some places doesn't mean you dont struggle at all. your condition and diagnosis is valid. your symptoms are valid. YOU ARE VALID. not checking all the supposed boxes doesn't mean you aren't neurodivergent. you are enough. you are valid. you are loved. you are valued. you matter. you belong in neurodivergent spaces, you deserve to use whatever resources are available to you, you are allowed to take up space in these communities. and i am so, so proud of you.
feel free to, and actually, i encourage you to reblog this with your experiences. we belong in this community as much as anyone else. please also tag this w/ any neurodivergent conditions i may have forgotten 💙
since this is getting lots of notes I'd like to add, even if you're undiagnosed or maybe self diagnosed, for whatever reason, (i.e. can't get access to a diagnosis, not being taken seriously, or just not wanting an official diagnosis, etc.) this still applies to you. actually especially to you folks. don't think for a second you're not valid just bc you don't have the paperwork or whatever to say it
#neurodivergent#neurodiversity#nd#autism#adhd#ocd#dyslexia#dyscalculia#asd#autism spectrum disorder#tourettes#tourettes syndrome#dyspraxia#hyperlexia#synesthesia#down syndrome#sensory processing disorder#schizophrenia#borderline personality disorder#bpd
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Something I wish a lot of people understood is that just because I mention wanting to do something completely doable doesn't mean it's going to happen. Not to speak for us all, but I've got ADHD. I'm almost entirely made up of "I'm gonna"s and "we should"s and "it would be so fun to"s and "one day"s and almost all of it means absolutely nothing.
Wanna know why?
Because when your to-do queue is 700 items deep and you add five new things to it each day, according to priority, almost all of it is never going to happen, even if you would really like it to. There's just not enough time in the world.
So!! If you're friends or lovers with someone like me and you keep wondering if that thing they said is ever going to happen, please ask them.
Because, personally, there is a good chance that if I suggested something would be fun to do with a friend and then didn't follow up on it within the week, I didn't know you were actually that interested, and/or completely forgot about it, and/or it got swallowed by the higher priority to-do items in the queue. If you ask me about it and say you really wanted to do that, your personal investment is going to make that item jump the queue by like 95%
Sincerely, a guy with so much ADHD
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Autism is dumb as hell. I was tossing and turning in my bed for hours every night for like three weeks, then I bought myself a soft blanket to lie on and suddenly I’m asleep in like a millisecond. How the hell was I supposed to know that was the problem. Give me a damn break autism
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We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.
#polls#incognito polls#anonymous#tumblr polls#tumblr users#questions#polls about brains#submitted nov 27#neurodivergent#neurodivergence#nd#cozy
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anyone else stay home for a while and be like "hmmmm been acting fine lately. maybe i'm not autistic." and then you have one (1) social interaction and you're like ah. the Autism strikes again.
#just me or#any of y'all get it#autism#actually autistic#autistic#audhd#adhd#neurodivergent#neurodiversity#nd#neurotypicals#autism experiences#me when i#autism tm#late diagnosed autistic#late diagnosed adhd#late diagnosed everything tbh#nd experiences#masking#sensory issues#spd
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it’s so funny to me that a major plot point of the original pokemon mystery dungeon game is like “hey, so… we had a town meeting about you (without you) and we all decided we don’t like you so you have to leave now. get out.” bc like, that’s basically what it’s like to be autistic in any given workplace lol
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Which side did you get your autism from and why is it your undiagnosed dad’s side?
#asd#autism#nd#neurodiversity#neurodivergence#neurodivergent#actually autistic#undiagnosed#my dad likes computers way too much#his dad …. likes trains#10k#hall of fame
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my frustration with “going nonverbal/nonspeaking” (as a fully nonverbal person)
transcript: my frustration with “going nonverbal/nonspeaking” (as a fully nonverbal person)
this written for instagram because of this post. but thought tumblr may like it too. “you” means general you, no one specific.
the instagram post and this on wordpress
this disclaimer is for instagram but also for anyone new to this discussion:
in full honestly, don’t know how to write this. am tired, language and complex ideas too much at time of writing, and general exhaust at having to argue same thing over and over again and justify own existence. tired of being minority within minority, wish there are others to do these work for me so i don’t have to do it all by self, singlehandedly advocate for everyone (not to mention problem with that—i can’t speak for everyone).
so honestly, if you don’t have anything nice to say, especially if you speaking (yes, even if you lose speech. include you), just don't say anything at all. move on.
online actually autistic community (AAut) dominated by white, lower support needs. level 1, speaking, late diagnosed, high masking autistics. find people like you is great, what not great is you treat your very narrow community as “voice of all autistic” and your experience as ultimate autistic experience. i write plenty about that, many more elaborate than this, if you not familiar with this concept.
many people in this community experience times when cannot speak, sometimes because overwhelm, shutdown, dissociate, or anxiety (situational mutism), but do not struggle with act of speaking rest of time (some struggle with speech all the time but still can speak - more on that later). the community call “going nonverbal/nonspeaking,” or even “when i am nonverbal nonspeaking” (not talking about those nonverbal as child and verbal now older), after clinical term “nonverbal” (nonverbal autism) and term coined by apraxic nonspeaking autistics “nonspeaking.”
both of which talk about it as an “all the time” experience.
when i search nonverbal or nonspeaking because i want community too, want see people like me too, two category i see: 1) parents of nonverbal nonspeaking children, whom can’t relate to because age, who can’t write own experience because their age and developmental ability. and 2) overwhelming amount of speaking autistic talk about going nonverbal going nonspeaking.
and the very very few fully nonverbal nonspeaking voices. drowned out. cannot find anyone.
nonverbal used to be term to describe us, people who can’t speak or cannot functionally speak beyond few words. medical term, alright, so some of us don’t like. so some of us reject that and create term all of our own, called nonspeaking. created by nonspeaking autistics with severe apraxia and brain body disconnect, describe their own experience of able to think in words able to spell out words (with great dedication and work and support), just cannot do that with mouth. their term. they create.
and you take it? without knowing context? without reading anything by those same nonspeaking coiners?
when is last time you purposely seek out nonverbal nonspeaking voices? when is last time you accidentally came across us? can you name any nonverbal nonspeaking advocate that talk about their experiences? one? two? three? a BIPOC person, a (specifically) Black person? a Black woman? a trans person? a physically disabled person? a person not from western world?
same narrative over and over. “i can speak for nonverbal autistic i understand their experience because i am autistic i can’t talk sometimes” no you cannot. as someone who was able to speak when young who lose speech (”go nonverbal”) but now have no speech to lose because full time nonverbal. no the experience not the same. not comparable. you gain it back. i don’t. you can explain with mouth words what happen when you get out. i can’t, i only have AAC. countless nonverbal nonspeaking people without AAC or sign cannot, at all. you never experience daily small and big struggle of casually being nonverbal all the time.
your experience of lose speech unique from my nonverbal. but if you so insist to compare and equate, you only guest to my experience, my daily life.
“when i go nonverbal and no one understand so have to force to speak” i cannot force words out. know you don’t mean to say this, and not saying you at fault for this, but nevertheless accidental perpetuate and reinforce idea that anyone who don’t speak can just be forced to speak if try hard enough. but often not how it works. and this exact harmful rhetoric devoid and delays nonverbal nonspeaking people given access to AAC, because “need try to force words out first, AAC unnatural so last resort.”
this may be new concept for you. new concept to instagram, to tiktok. to other places. it may seem i only one with this problem, “i once saw a nonspeaking person’s account and they don’t have problem.”
yeah, because we are not monolith. some nonverbal nonspeaking people don’t care. some nonverbal nonspeaking people may even welcome “go nonverbal nonspeaking” or “when i am nonverbal nonspeaking.”
but don’t be fooled into believe i only one. have many nonverbal/nonspeaking and/or higher support needs friends on tumblr, who talk about this who have been saying this for years. *years*. years before i joined. i am not creator, i only bring message here, because many of us are too high support needs too disabled to do anything else. many of us only stay on our small corner of tumblr because it most peaceful, because at least some listen, because least hostile, because need to defend our experience against our own community the least. (but it happens less doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen, we still exhausted.) many of us only stay on our small corner of tumblr because that all we can handle, or because we not allowed or shouldn’t be on other social media because age or abilities or both.
i cannot handle conflict i do not do well and i shouldn’t be here. but if not me, who else? if i don’t do it, who else is going to?
some nonverbal nonspeaking people and parents of them may question, why you start debate about useless term when so many nonverbal nonspeaking people don’t even have access to communicate, real problems. to that i say i do those work too. and to that i say this is real problem too, because am autistic so online actually autistic community should also be my space too but it not. but it hostile. because am lonely because seeing yourself so crucial because don’t know anyone in person like me don’t have any friends in person like me, so i go online to find people like me and i cannot because no own term to search and what used to be term many people without similar experience insist they understand and can speak for me because they say we have similar experience. because this aloneness and the unique difficulty from being full time nonverbal and the struggle of future and the unique mistreatment from both outside but also inside community have drove me over edge many times and it is presence and knowing their presence of my tumblr nonverbal nonspeaking / higher support needs friends that gave me hope to stay. because so many people don’t listen and instead speak over. terminology only a symptom of problem. address roots, sure, but part of address roots is address symptoms.
‘well nonverbal people are never around” maybe it because you don’t make it welcome for us to join.
“fully nonverbal rare anyway” estimated 30% of us nonverbal nonspeaking, which this statistic probably only count those nonverbal since birth. even more are minimally speaking or without full functional communication, abilities limited to requests. sure, 30% still not majority. but significant amount never the less. speaking lower support needs autistic without intellectual disability not majority anyway too but your experience still deserve heard. ours too.
“see less nonverbal people because they don't have ability to communicate and use social media” yes, many nonverbal nonspeaking people not given access to communication (like AAC), forced to live in silence (because body language communication not enough alone!). silence from birth to teenage years, to adulthood, even until they die. some cannot understand social media or AAC because intellectual disability or cognitive ability. some not allowed on there because safety, some not allowed on because presumed incompetent and abused. all true. do you advocate for them too? or is it just talking point against me, pretend you care?
but not all of us, we exist. some of us thankfully supportive parents all along, parents given resources, us given resources, so we access to AAC since beginning. some of us became nonverbal later in life (which not same experience as those early in life, i acknowledge). some of us after years of forced silence, finally given access to AAC and can now communicate and advocate! some of us on social media - do you listen?
but you see none of us in your community anyway. maybe one token person.
you can go nonverbal. i cannot go verbal. see difference? you can come close to my experience, but i never will have (future) ability to go to yours.
it frustrate that have to specify am nonverbal **all the time** when write this, because if don’t do that will be assumed otherwise. frustrate that when in neurodivergent space stranger see me AAC they assume i can speak because they only know part time users (know part time users frustrate too because people assume they cannot speak and get surprised when they do. me being assumed automatic part time is not fault of part time AAC users.)
even been told am privileged to be nonverbal nonspeaking, privilege over speaking autistic who lose speech because in their mind it mean i get all support i need i get all recognition get all the representation. which. couldn’t be farther from truth.
all that. is fraction of reason i frustrate at “going nonverbal nonspeaking” and “when i was nonverbal nonspeaking.”
so many other words. lose speech. intermittent speech.
just want have own sub community where can find people similar experience.
#actually autistic#actuallyautistic#autism#nonverbal#nonspeaking#actually nonverbal#actually nonspeaking#nd#asd#loaf screm#long post
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STOP CREATING THE ILLUSION OF FAILURE.
you have created an ego and then you have created the experience of failing. WHY?
"but how did i create it?"
BECAUSE you are too busy trying to change a world that does not exist instead of realising that the world is NOT separate from you.
"well if it's not separate then why is it projecting what 'i' dont want?"
because thats what you are aware of! you are too scared to let go of an 'undesirable' illusion and be aware of what you want to experience. the world is not separate from Self because it IS Self and You have imposed on YourSelf limitations. imagine limiting a 'GOD'. imagine limiting that which is formless. it is a bit silly, right?
stop resisting success. allow it to occur. stop expecting failure.
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Things I'd love for the Internet to leave in 2023:
• misusing the word "delusional" or saying "delulu"
• public freakout videos that are just someone displaying psychotic symptoms
• "I'm in your walls" and other paranoia triggering "jokes"
• schizoposting
• misusing the word "psychotic"
• baiting and triggering people online who are openly psychotic or displaying psychotic symptoms
• excluding schizo-spec and psychotic people from any neurodiversity/mental illness awareness
Let's just all try to be better to schizo-spec and psychotic people. And hold others accountable as well.
#2024#new years eve#tw im in your walls#tw paranoia#mental illness#nd#schizophrenia#neurodivergent#schizophrenic#psychosis#actuallyschizophrenic#mental health awareness#pseriouslypsychotic#schizo-spec
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Nobody talks about the hard parts about autism.
Nobody talks about not knowing when you need to eat, drink or pee. Not knowing when you're in pain, or why you're in pain. Not being able to communicate what you need.
Or when change is so hard to deal with you have meltdowns and outbursts. When you can't control your anger and hurt yourself or others. When you can't emote unless you're breaking down.
Or when you can't understand what someone is saying, what you're reading, anything. When you can't even try because trying makes it worse. When you ask for help but not getting what they say just makes you more frustrated.
And so many more difficult experiences we have to deal with that no one likes.
#sam.txt#sam.neuro#sam.disabled#asd#autism spectrum disorder#autism#neurodivergent#nd#actually autism#actually neurodivergent#actually nd
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Irritates the hell out of me when people respond to a post or comment like, "everyone does this, it's not just [disorder/illness/neurotype], it's called being a person."
Yeah and everyone coughs once in a while but it doesn't mean someone with pneumonia doesn't cough?? It doesn't mean pneumonia doesn't cause coughing??
Everyone gets dizzy once in a while but it doesn't mean vertigo doesn't exist??
Just about every symptom or group-common trait is going to be experienced by people who don't belong to those groups or have that disorder. It's about the frequency and intensity with which that symptom or trait comes up.
#disability#adhd#autism#asd#nd#actually adhd#neurodivergent#actually disabled#disabled#pots#pots syndrome#postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome#fibro#cfs#chronic pain#chronic illness#chronic fatigue#chronic fatigue syndrome
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