#i wanna cry so bad but I can’t let ruin my life even more | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

Visit Blog

Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.

Fun Fact

Tumblr was attacked by a cross-site scripting worm deployed by the Internet troll group GNAA on Dec 3, 2012.

#i wanna cry so bad but I can’t let ruin my life even more

boyfriendstevie · 3 months

Note

heeeeey bestie >:) i think it’s a NEED (not a want) that i get a blurb with prompt #5 of those best friends that fool around

this has been in my drafts for literal months, so here's a lil treat for u hehe | kinda mean steve, fwb w a hint of feelings if u squint (i can't help myself), fingering, afab!reader 18+ only!! mdni!!

Steve knows you like the back of his hand. Better, even. He knows your favorite flower, knows what will cheer you up after a bad day, knows what you look like after an ugly cry, knows how to make you laugh so hard you can’t breathe. That comes with the territory of being friends for your entire life. And now that you’ve… expanded your definition of friendship, he knows you even better. So he definitely knows when you’re about to cum, and is using it to his advantage.

“Asshole!”

The word comes out with much less bite than you intend, sounding more than a little pathetic as you let out a hiccupy sob. Steve’s been teasing you for what feels like hours, which, okay, is maybe deserved, considering you went out of your way to make him jealous, but this is bordering on cruel. The way he’s brought you to the edge more than once, with his mouth, his fingers, only to pull away before you can cum. Your thighs tremble around his figure, cunt clenching around nothing; a protest of your ruined orgasm.

He laughs, sounding smug as his eyes glint in the dim light of his bedroom, “What’s wrong, babe? I thought this was what you wanted. Wanted my attention, and now you have it.” As if to prove his point, two of his fingers dip into the well of slick at your entrance.

You let loose a breathless whine, your hips jerking in a desperate attempt to get Steve right where you want him. It works — if only for a moment — as his fingers slide to your clit, drawing another choked whimper from you, “Steve— f-fuck, please—“

It’s nearly evil, the grin on his face. He’s so pleased with himself, knowing exactly what will draw more of the noises he loves out of you. What will make you beg until he actually gives you what you want. Knows that if he draws a line up your inner thigh and cups your perfect cunt in his palm, you’ll make another pretty noise as you grind against the heel of his hand, desperate for anything.

“Fuckin’ hell,” he mutters under his breath. This is almost as torturous for him as it is for you, his cock hard and straining against the fabric of his boxers at the sound of your moans. He doesn’t want to show his cards quite yet, though, and slowly circles one digit over your entrance, “Please what, baby? Christ, you’re wet, huh? There somethin’ you want?”

“Want—“ you cut yourself off with a sharp inhale, jaw clenching and body tensing when Steve brushes your clit again with a featherlight touch, “Want you. Please, Steve. W-wanna cum—“

“Aw,” Steve coos, feigning sympathy as he pushes his lips out to match the pout on yours, “You wanna cum, babe?”

You nod frantically, hair crushed against his pillow underneath you, “Please. Need you.” Your cheek presses to your shoulder as you blink up at Steve and murmur an apology, “I— ‘m sorry for fl-flirting with him. Only w-want you, Steve. Only need you.”

Steve’s heart melts a bit, flutters in his chest at your admission, and he eases up on you despite himself, sinking two long fingers into your tight heat. You let out a shuddering gasp, a high-pitched whine as you clench around his fingers. He twitches in his boxers, all but growling as he leans over and captures your lips with his, fingers curling deep inside of you. It’s not quite enough, but you’re so close to falling apart, and you moan into the kiss.

He can’t find it in himself to continue denying you the pleasure you’re desperate for, and pulls back just enough to watch your face contort into one of bliss as his fingers pump in and out of you, the pad of his thumb finding your clit. “Gonna cum on my fingers, pretty girl?”

“Yes!” you gasp, writhing against the sheets, against Steve’s touch, as a white heat twists in your tummy like a coil about to snap. The thumb on your clit doubles down as your face scrunches up; Steve knows you well enough to know just how close you are, and with all the teasing, it doesn’t take long until you fall apart, his name on your lips.

“There you go. Atta girl,” Steve says as he lifts his hand to his lips, still a little smug, though it’s tinged with his own want. “Think you can handle my cock, baby? Think you can cum again for me?”

#steve harrington smut #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington #stevie #steve thots #kit writes #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington blurb

314 notes · View notes

sukiipjs · 2 months

Text

✮ BLONDIE : PT 1

°:. *₊ ° . ☆ °:. *₊ ° . ° .•

↳ nick sturniolo x masc reader

↳ words - 2239

↳ summary - you’ve been having a hard time realizing and accepting the fact that you’re gay, and in love with your best friend. you try to ignore the feelings but that only makes everything worse until you can’t hide it anymore.

↳ contains - swearing, angst, use of y/n, internalized homophobia, depression, crying, idk??? [READ PT 2 - PT 3]

↳ song - blondie by current joys

°:. *₊ ° . ☆ °:. *₊ ° . ° .•

°:. *₊ ° . ☆

nick has been my best friend for years, he’s always been there for me, and me there for him. we met in the first grade when he saw me alone at recess on the swings and he ran up to me, asking if i wanted to play with him and his brothers. one of the many things i love about him, hes always there, always there to help, or just be with. from that day on he’s always been my number one but honestly, i’ve been kind of avoiding him lately.

of course i don’t want to, i really really don’t want to, trust me, but i don’t want to make anything bad between us either. even though pushing him away is probably fucking things up anyway.

the thing is, for months, maybe even years now i think that i might be coming to a realization: i think i’m gay, or not gay but bi? i hate labels, i dont want to be put into a box, its honestly just hard to fit into one too. i mean i’ve had girlfriends before and i’ve liked that, but nick…

okay i might be coming to another realization: i think i’m in love with nick. and to make everything worse, i can’t even talk to anyone about this because the only person i would tell is nick, but if i told him, well i just cant, it could destroy our friendship. he’d hate me, i cant lose him.

but maybe i’m not in love with him, i mean i love nick, i always have but maybe its not love love? maybe its just me appreciating our friendship more. okay who am i kidding it’s definitely becoming more, I LOVE HIM. he’s just perfect, in general, to me, to everyone. i want to spend every moment of my life with him, i want to hug him and never let him go, i want to be with him, i just want to see him again.

i can’t even imagine what he’d say if he knew i liked him. he’d probably be disgusted, i’d ruin our friendship forever. i cant do that, i can’t risk anything like that, i need him even if that means the best thing i can do is just stay away, make up lies of why i cant hang out, slowly stop texting him, i mean maybe it's not the best thing but its either i do this and try and force these feelings down or i tell him and ruin everything. this is better, or at least that’s what i keep telling myself.

☆ °:. *₊ ° . °

nick 🫶

| wanna hang out today? haven’t seen you in forever, i’m boredddd

| i know i’m sorry, but i cant today, really really sorry. still not feeling good

| that’s okay, hope you feel better though 💕 if you need anything tell me okay?

| i’d rather hang out with you and get sick then spend one more second with my idiot brothers over here 💀

i stare at the message on my screen, i’m not sick, i’m just trying to be a good friend… by avoiding my best friend… sure, whatever.

i slam down my phone on my mattress, rolling over and burying my face in my pillow. muffled screams from my mouth as tears, start to pour from my eyes. every time i message him, saying i cant hang out i immediately regret it. i want to see him, i always do but again, i cant, i fucking cant. it would only make my feelings stronger and i just need to get rid of them as soon as i can so things can just go back to how they were.

fuck, here comes the spiral that ive been replaying in my head forever. do i even really like him? am i really bi, gay, straight, whatever the fuck? i don’t even know, it’s all too confusing and stressful right now. why can’t i just be me? and have my best friend with me again? actually hang out with him, see him?

all i can really do right now is continue screaming and crying into my pillow about how much of a shitty friend i’m being, great. I constantly stalk his instagram, trying to see if i do really like him and try to see what he’s up to without me, i miss him so much.

…i wish he was a girl then i would be straight and all this shit wouldn’t hurt so much. i’m not trying to say that being gay is bad, all i’m saying is that it would be easier to figure all this out if i was straight and he was a girl. i know that’s so messed up to say but i don’t know how else to put it.

if he was a girl, i’d know that i’m in love with him, i wouldn’t be so afraid to accept myself because there wouldn’t be anything to accept. i’d just be me and he’d she’d be him her, i’d get to be his her boyfriend and we’d be a happy couple. i’d be happy and i wouldn’t have to push the person i love most in this stupid world away…

i smash my face into my silky white pillowcase over and over, shaking my head as i force the sides of the pillow into my face more. i want to suffocate.

i scream into my pillow more and more. ‘i love you nick, i love you nick, i love you. i DONT love you nick, i DONT love you nick, i DONT love you… but i do, i really really do, but i cant… i really really fucking cant.’

°:. *₊ ° . ☆

i stay rotting in my bed, spiraling about random shit, taking random quizzes of ‘am i gay?’ or ‘am i in love with my bestfriend?’ or ‘is it a crush?’ like i know.

soft blankets cover me, my silky pillows supporting my back as i rewatch rupaul's drag race on my computer until i finish it again, oreos and empty dr pepper cans surround me. and of course, nick always in my mind, everything reminding me of him, those stupid quizzes, his favorite show, his favorite drink. i wish he could be here, like how we used to hang out before i started ruining everything but i could be ruining it more, at least im keeping my mouth shut.

every once and a while, a message from nick pops up. him sending me a tiktok or telling me about how spacecamp is going or just something random, asking how im doing, if im still sick. most times i try to ignore him, turning off the notifications but i answer sometimes, only one or two words, maybe just an emoji, just trying to say something. i don’t want him to think i hate him or anything, i still of course love him.

the only time i ever get up from my bed is to go the the bathroom or get more food, ive been wearing the same two sweatpants alternating them and random shirts that i throw on the floor after i wear them for enough. my hair shaggy and a scratchy stubble on my face. i look and feel gross. i didnt think that forcing my best friend away and trying to figure out my sexuality could make me this depressed, who knew.

☆ °:. *₊ ° . °

weeks pass of me ignoring (or at least trying to ignore) nick and weeks of screaming into my sheets and sleeping all day become more and more. i finally decide to leave my apartment and stock up on some random things that will help me rot in my room even more: coffee, chips, oreos, whatever else i might want.

as i scan the aisle for dr pepper, standing in my gray hoodie with the hood covering me and one of the two sweatpants i’ve been wearing on, i hear a voice at the end of the row calling to me, “y/n?” my head turns to see who knows me that’s here, about to see how disgusting i look and just my luck, it’s nick.

“nick” a bright smile floods my face, i haven’t seen him for what seems like forever, i look at his blonde hair with grown out brunette roots, plus that signature nose ring and star earrings, of course he looks great.

he runs up to me, giving me a warm hug as he smiles too, “oh my god i haven’t seen you in decadessss” he exaggerates, laughing at me, “you feeling better now?” i tilt my head a little, confused but then i remember my lie. “oh yeah, i am. even though i dont look it” i try to scoff a laugh, looking down at myself, excusing how ‘i dont care’ i look right now.

“you look fine.” he laughs back again, “you know… me, chris and matt were gonna go out for dinner soon, wanna come?” i can tell he really wants me to be there and i really want to but i try to push it away, still.

“uhhh, i think had something later, sorry” my small smile slowly fading as his does too, i don’t think i’ve seen his smile leave that fast. “really? we haven’t talked in weeks, i miss you” he jokes a little, but really we do miss each other.

“i know, i’m sorry, but i promise we’ll hang out soon yeah?” i try to fake a small smile, trying to make this a little better but nick still looks sad, “yeah okay, see you later then?” he looks like he hates me, he looks just annoyed, hurt. i feel terrible.

“yeah, later” i’m about to walk closer to give him another hug but he leaves, to i assume go find his brothers, before i can. i’m terrible.

i finish up grabbing my things before leaving and driving off, replaying our interaction in my head. i could’ve just went? it was one dinner, that’s all. not a big deal. but it’s too late, it would just be weird if my schedule suddenly cleared up now.

°:. *₊ ° . ☆

i make my way back to my apartment, putting my bags down on the counter before going straight to my room again, flopping down on top of the pile of blankets and stuffed animals that cover my bed.

i dig in my pocket for my phone, taking it out as i grab a blanket to pull it over my face, closing off the sun that shines through my window.

i go straight to me and nicks messages, thinking of texting him. ‘i’m sorry’ too short, plain. ‘sorry, i was wrong i can go’ feels like i’m pitying him, plus just dumb. ‘i love you’ yeah definitely not. ‘come over? sorry’ again, stupid and he can NOT see the mess i have over here.

i decide on nothing and put my phone to the side of me, burying my head into my pillows again, tears flooding my eyes again again again. it’s too much. this is all stupid and i need to get over it all. this is terrible.

i go back to my cycle of curling up in warm blankets, eating my now new oreos and dr pepper and rewatching shows i’ve seen a million times before. and obviously stalking nicks instagram, he posted a story of him and his brothers at dinner. he’s still wearing those earrings and that same beige jacket he was wearing before, and he still looks great.

i swipe up, about to message him. ‘you look great, sorry i couldn’t come’ i quickly delete it and just like the story. i need to stop trying to message him when i’m trying to ignore him.

₊ ° .☆ °:. *₊

after falling asleep shortly after i finished looking at nicks story i wake up to like five texts from who? nick, of course.

nick 🫶

| are you ignoring me?

| like did i do something or what?

| are you okay?

| can we just talk or hang out please?

| y/n?

| okay sorry actually, never mind

my heart drops, i feel so TERRIBLE. nick did nothing and i never want him to think that he did something wrong. he’s perfect.

i pick up my phone to respond but honesty i don’t know if i should… i want him to know that he did nothing but he’s right about me ignoring him… fuck this. i just ignore him, still.

i shut off my phone fast and roll to my other side, curling up my legs and staring at the small textured bumps on the off-white wall that i face. i take in every detail, trying to distract myself with something else. i spot all the tiny discolorations or stains on the wall, the way it all starts to blur when tears, again, rain out my eyes.

they drip on the curves of my cheeks and lips, my hands are tucked under my legs as he tears drop onto my sheets, i don’t bother wiping them off. they make a small circle ish shape when it hits on my bed with a darker gray on my gray sheets.

my spiraling hits again when the ridges on my wall go dark as my eyes close. why can’t my best friend just be my best friend? why can’t i just be a normal person? why can’t i just forget it all? why can’t this all just go away? why? why? why? why?

☆ °:. *₊ ° . °

taglist : @slutforchriss @mattsleftnipple03 @mattsdinosweater @ccolleenn @mixvchelle @leah-loves-lilies @sturn-wrld @redz0nez9 @cheriematt @freshloveforthefit @nickuniversity @whore4matt @txssvx @will-yummy

#chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo smut #sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo smut #nicolas sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo x reader #sturniolo triplets x reader #sturniolo #𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢𝐢𝐩𝐣𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝜗𝜚⋆#sukiipjs #𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢𝐢𝐩𝐣𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐬 𝜗𝜚⋆

124 notes · View notes

nokiatelava · 3 months

Text

✿✿My People✿✿

Author’s Note - Hi again! I don’t have much to say I think!! I think this one is gonna be a bit long.. Longgggg.. But I hope you all enjoy the story!

Summary - Today is the day you absolutely dreaded. You’re moving away, and your father is stepping down from Olo’eyktan. Now Awpxey’s parents had made their decision, and you’re all ears waiting for him to tell you.

Warnings - crying, mentions of a knife, mentions of a cut, kissing, actually moving, flashback from getting kidnapped, anxiety, throwing up, small fainting spells, girl having a crush on a girl, comfort

That morning, you woke up feeling heavy. Incredibly heavy.

You sighed as you continued to fake sleep, hoping to catch more of a desired slumber.

“Y/n.” You hear a voice. “Y/n, wake up.” Soon after you feel a hand come down onto your shoulder, shaking you gently.

Scrunching your face you open your eyes, your vision is blurry at first and it scares you.

It reminds you of that night all those weeks ago.

Your breath picks up more as you still could barely see.

You shot up to sit up straight, your arms coming out in front of you to feel around your surroundings.

Your body is slowly becoming more frantic and you’re panicking.

“Hey, hey. I’m right here, it’s okay, it’s okay.” Your arms are pushed down before your head is placed onto someone’s shoulder.

“D-dad?” Your voice is weak as your chest rises and fell quickly.

“I’m right here, it’s me babygirl. It’s okay.”

You closed your eyes as you reveled silently in your father’s arms. His warm hand rubbing your back up and down worked to calm you down.

“Sorry dad.. I just got scared because I couldn’t see..” You whispered embarrassingly.

“Don’t apologize for it Y/n. I know what happened that night was really, really scary.” You nodded against Jake’s shoulder, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath.

After a minute of silence you couldn’t hold it back anymore.

“I don’t wanna leave.” You let out a sob, tears falling onto the crook of your dad’s shoulder.

“I know babygirl, I know. I don’t want to leave either.” Jake’s voice became a bit shaky as he really thought about the situation.

Of course your going to be sad you have to leave. You were born here, raised here, had all of your good and bad moments here.

Because of the Sky People, you are being ripped away from your home, family, and life.

The future you had planned for yourself now is completely ruined.

Those bastards have ruined everything for you.

What they did to you that night has left you traumatized and full of scars.

A scarred state of mind and a scarred body.

You can’t go to bed peacefully at the thought of the terrors that haunt you. You can’t even wake up without a skipping heart from a simple tap on the shoulder.

“What they did to me that night wasn’t right dad.” You shook your head as the tears only fell more.

Jake only nodded, rocking you in his arms as the tears in his eyes started to spill over.

“You’re here now, and I got you. I’m not going anywhere Y/n.” You let out a small smile at your father’s reassuring words.

“I’m gonna be here to protect you always.”

“Thank you dad.” You pulled away from the hug, still smiling. “I love you.”

“I love you more Y/n.”

Jake caught sight of the remaining tears left on your sleeked cheeks, so he brought his hands to cup your face, and gently swiped his fingers under your eyes.

“He’s cleaning your tears for you just like he had done when you were a baby.” Another voice is heard from behind you, you look to see it’s your mom, a small smile on her face as she looked at the scene in front of her.

“You were always falling, scraping your knees.” Neytiri kneeled down next to you, brushing loose strands of your hair behind your ear.

“You always tried to be a little tough guy. Holding your tears and not looking any of us in the face.” Jake laughed as he recounted the many memories.

“I was just embarrassed!” You defended yourself.

“You never complain when you’re in pain Y/n, and that scares us.” You looked at your mother.

“It scares you guys?” You asked quizzically, and Jake nodded quickly. “A lot.”

You huffed as you thought about it. There has been a lot, a lot, of times where you’ve been in pain and have never said anything.

“Sorry guys..” Your ears fold down as you feel a sense of disappointment in yourself, but your parents smile as they hug you.

“Stop apologizing Y/n.” They said in sync.

Next thing you know, other hands and bodies are felt toppling onto your hug.

“Yeah sis, you should cut that out.”

“Lo’ak, I’m gonna be nice to you this once.” You sigh in warning, rolling your eyes.

After making sure you, and everyone else had their stuff.

It was now the time to do the most difficult thing in your life.

The ceremony of your father stepping down from Olo’eyktan was soon, and you couldn’t stomach it.

Your body only felt the need to churn itself more as the sight of Awpxey came into view.

Your shoulders sagged as he got closer to you.

“If you came to tell me bad news, just don’t say anything.” All Awpxey did was hug you.

And you had obviously interpreted that wrong, thinking without asking.

You wiped your eyes as your lip quivered intensely, sniffling like a wild animal.

“I’m gonna miss you so much.” Your voice was faded and broken as you shook in his hug.

“No, no, no, no, no! Y/n, Y/n I’m so sorry I didn’t mean for it to come off like that.” Awpxey moved back and held your face in his hands.

“I’m going with you.”

It was like a heaven in your ears, as if an angel was actively talking to you.

“Really? Y-you are?” You grabbed onto his forearms to keep your balance as what he said made you dizzy.

“Yes Y/n I am, I swear!” You cupped his face, bringing him into a passionate kiss.

You weren’t really thinking much about where you were while you were freely kissing your boyfriend.

You pulled away from the kiss. “Awpxey where are your parents? I-I have to say thank you to them. I have to because they’re letting you come with me and we’re going so far.”

You scratched your head as you moved away, trying to peer into the huge crowd of people who were awaiting the ceremony to start. Trying to spot Itxä and Puo.

“We’ll find them later, okay?” He pulled your hand gently from your head, holding them in both of his hands.

You looked into his eyes, smiling giddily.

“I’m excited..” You whisper, pulling your hand to cover your smile.

“I am too.” Awpxey’s ears twitched as your laugh registered in his head.

“I’m really thankful for your parents you know… For letting you actually come with me.” You swallowed as you looked down.

“You’ve gotten me to open up. A lot. And with something like this, all I need is support.” You started to nervously chew your lip as you thought carefully for your words.

“I don’t have a lot left to give Awpxey..” Your throat started to hurt as it felt like it was closing in on itself.

“If I had to be there by myself, I don’t think I would have talked ever again.” Your voice broke. “I love you a lot Awpxey. And you have done so, so much for me. And I can’t thank you enough.”

Awpxey smiled at your words, reaching his hands up and wiping your tears away. “Don’t cry for me Y/n.. I’m happy I’m going with you. I’m going to be here to support you forever.” You laughed through your tears, nodding while you wiped you eye.

“I’ve cried a lot today already.” You laugh embarrassed. Awpxey laughed, “have you?”

You nodded, “oh yeah. Started right after I woke up.” You shook your head as you wiped your hands on your loincloth.

“Today is a stressful day Y/n, it is not your fault.” You fiddled with your hands awkwardly.

“Can I have a hug Awpxey?” You physically felt like leering the other way because of the question.

Awpxey only grinned. Without a word he wrapped his arms around you, squeezing you close to him.

You returned the gesture back, letting a deep breath go as you tried to mentally prepare yourself for what was to come.

Your father looked on from afar, watching how you and Awpxey interacted.

He doesn’t know exactly how to feel.

He’s happy, happy his first babygirl has found the love from somebody she wants.

He’s angry, angry as he feels like your being taken away from him, angry as he feels like his love wasn’t enough.

He’s sad, sad as he realizes you have finally grown up, you are no longer a baby. No longer crawling around, no longer sucking your thumb, he’s no longer rocking you to sleep.

His fingers twitch as he remembers what it was like picking you up. You were the chubbiest baby out of all your siblings. Lo’ak not to far behind.

In the end, all Jake did was let out a soft, small smile.

He is happy.

Your fingers shook as you had them held tightly to your sides. Watching closely as your father stood in front of the young warrior he was passing his title over to, Tarsem.

Your heart pounded hardly in your chest, the harmonic beat loud in your ears.

You watched as Mo’at spoke, her words going in one ear and out the other.

You couldn’t stand the moment of silence, the moment of silence right before the knife Tarsem held came down to your father’s chest.

The scream Tarsem let out rattled through you. You were so jumpy, too antsy. Your eyes wide open as you looked on in a somewhat fearful way.

Awpxey’s hand came around and fell lightly onto your lower back. “It’s okay Y/n, just breathe tìyawn, breathe.” You let out a breath you had no idea you were holding.

Your father is no longer Olo’eyktan.

Your mother’s head fell as she began to cry. You were quick to wrap yourself around her, holding her head to your shoulder.

Your heart continued to pump harshly in your chest, and Awpxey stood right behind you, his hand rubbing your shoulder warmly.

You tried your hardest to hold your tears, but it was impossible.

When your father stood back up straight, wails were audible from the crowd.

The people were almost just as sad as you. The Olo’eyktan they’ve had for almost two decades now has to step down early.

Their Toruk Makto is leaving. The man who had led them to victory against the Sky People 17 years ago.

When your family approached the crowd, the people split just like the sea. Allowing your family to walk through the middle.

People turned their heads to hide their crying faces, children watched on in sadness as they had to see you leave.

Many cried.

Not only did you babysit, but you also taught a group of children.

They loved you like you were family, and you the same. So to hear their cries for you only broke your heart more.

You had to force yourself to walk forward.

Soon, you were approaching where you all were supposed to meet your ikran.

That was until you seen Itxä and Puo.

Your knees started to feel weak and you didn’t know what to do. When you finally got close enough, you were able to see their happy but saddened faces.

“Thank you so much for letting Awpxey come with us.” You look between the both of them, your hands coming to rest over your heart. “I am forever grateful.”

Itxä smiled at you, pulling you into a hug. “I know our son loves you very much. He wouldn’t have taken no for an answer regardless of what we could have said.” You both laughed, rocking in the hug.

When you separated, you turned to Puo, the small smile you had still on your face.

“Take care of yourself Y/n. Remember to take time for yourself.” You nodded at Puo’s kind words, pulling him into a hug also.

You left to give Awpxey time with his parents. So you walked towards your grandmother, who was busying herself with petting Azraa’s head.

“Grandma.” You called, playing nervously with your shawl. Mo’at turned to look at you quickly, a bitter smile on her face.

“We are leaving soon, I wanted to say goodbye one last time.” Your grandmother only nodded, her throat too dry to force words out.

“Protect yourself over there Y/n. If you need to, always separate yourself if you need time to heal.”

“Here,” she pointed to your chest, insinuating your heart. “And here.” Placing her finger directly in the middle of your forehead.

You wrapped your arms around her, hugging her tightly.

“I’m gonna miss you grandma..” You whisper, biting back the new wave of tears.

“I will miss you too Y/n.” The two of you talked for a little bit before the rest of your family finally re-grouped and Awpxey came along.

You noticed his face was red, and you knew immediately he had to have been crying. But you didn’t say anything out loud, not wanting to put him on the spot.

Though, you did brush a finger over one of his knuckles as you stood together.

Your hands intertwined when your father started speaking.

“The journey to the clan we’re moving to is a long one.” Your dad looked through all of you. “About 5 days.” Your dad sighed.

Tuk let out an exaggerated groan, “why does it have to take so long?” Jake smiled as he responded. “So we can be safe Tuk, we need to be far away from here.” His hand came down to her head, softly running his hand through her braids.

“So we won’t make it there by tomorrow?” Her childish innocence make your heart slow a bit. She still doesn’t even know what is completely going on.

“No, we won’t make it by tomorrow Tuk.” Neytiri laughed as she reached under Tuk’s armpits, picking her up.

“You want to ride with Mama?” She spoke to Tuk kindly as she walked towards her ikran, Tuk’s nods being visible from far away.

“Let’s head out now..” Your dad merely whispered, walking with his head down as he approached his ikran, Bob.

You looked at Awpxey, nodding before exchanging a quick kiss — though it was more peck like.

You all mounted your respective ikran, flying towards the edge of the forest.

When you all were far enough, you turned to see the view.

And oh my Eywa was it beautiful.

You wished you could have enjoyed the beauty under best circumstances. This will probably be the first and last time you ever get to see a beautiful, full view of your home.

You try not to acknowledge that information as you turn around on your Ikran, facing forward ready to try and embrace this change.

The journey was tough.

Some days were hard as your family had to travel through storms. You had never seen the ocean before,and you were shocked to how angry it could get. The waves would hit high, the strikes of sounds that violently percussed off the rocks when the waves hit them punched a sense of fear in your stomach.

At one point while you were flying over a rock, a very, very strong wave reached up, going past Azraa’s stomach — her whole body — which had gotten you both drenched in saltwater, and had also pulled you down towards the relentless, unforgiving sea below.

After that, you had made sure to stay clear of being too close.

On the last day of your flight, you sighed in exhaustion as your butt felt so sore, your head feeling dizzy while your stomach turned.

At least it was sunny outside.

It was early in the day, which was great because it would give the clan you’re coming to a whole day to warm up to you. You gained the knowledge that the clan’s species was Metkayina, and the village you will be asking to live in is called, Awa’atlu.

When the island had finally came into sight, all you could do was smile. The feeling of going up and down and the swaying of flying made you feel sick, although you loved to fly, it was an action that wasn’t meant to be used long.

When you had flown over the tide pools and pass some living spaces, a loud conch was blown.

Multiple times.

It felt like the vibrations were traveling throughout your whole body, your stomach dropping as a nauseous feeling crawled up your throat.

When landing, the feeling of not being in the air felt foreign, and your body leaned forward, slumping as you blacked out for 3 seconds max. Coming to, you got off your Ikran, disconnecting from the overdue Tsaheylu, making your kuru feel sore.

People gathered quickly, spears held up towards the Sun, making the dangerous weapons glint with a deceiving shine.

Your legs shook like jello as you walked, and you held onto the gear around Azraa to keep you steady. That was until a hand wrapped around your bicep, pulling you in.

Without looking you immediately laid your head against that person’s shoulder, already knowing who it was.

“Awpxey..” You licked your dry lips as you shook your head. “I feel sick. I don’t feel good at all.”

Awpxey only rubbed your back, noticing the way your skin felt clammy as he tried thinking of something to say that won’t make you feel worse.

“We won’t be here for long Y/n, we only need to be granted the permission of sanctuary, and then you can sleep.” He whispered quietly into your ear, deciding on that as he knew how tired you must feel.

You sighed, thinking negatively and wondering what would happen if you weren't granted Uturu.

What do you do then? Are you supposed to just hold through and fly for Eywa knows how long until you finally fall upon a village that will take you in?

Your thoughts were interrupted when a creature flew over the heads of your family. You didn't put effort in ducking. Your knees were too weak and you knew that the person commanding the animal was not going to hit your family on purpose.

A man had climbed of the loud screeching creature. And by the outfit and accessories he had on, he had to be the Olo’eyktan.

And he obviously was because as soon as he was close enough, your father had greeted him with his hand coming to his forehead and down with a small bow. Looking behind himself to make sure the rest of you were following him in front of the watchful eyes of the clan.

“Olo’eyktan Tonowari, Oel Ngati Kameie.”

The Olo’eyktan was kind, he looks kind, and he was quick to greet your father, and all of you back the same way.

“Jake Sully, Oel Ngati Kameie.”

As your father and Tonowari got to talking, you closed your eyes. Trying to level your breathing and calm the waves of nausea that flipped your stomach.

Your attention was taken as you heard the shuffling of sand, and an increase of the murmurs from the clan that was gathered around you.

You reluctantly peeled your eyes open, they burned from the duration of time they were forced to be held open.

You noticed the crowd parting, making way for a figure that hasn’t yet meet your sight. Though you gained an idea as you heard the melodic rattle of what seemed to have been seashells.

Your theory was proven right when a woman had exited the crowd, her pace was slow and she walked cautiously, watching every single one of you.

You could barely focus on the conversation that was happening between your parents and the clan leaders. The only thing you could do was try to ignore the way the Sun beat your back, the usual warm, sunny feeling felt dreadful as it spread an uncomfortable heat throughout your body. This only made the feeling in your stomach worsen, your face tightened, your eyebrows stiff together.

Awpxey felt it against his shoulder, and he turned to you, concerned. “Y/n?” He seen your expression, and quickly wiped a hand against your forehead, a cold sweat was the outcome against his fingertips.

“Shit.” He mumbled, “hold on for me tìyawn, please.” Awpxey adjusted your body, holding you in a way that was comfortable for both of you as he felt your body start to slack.

“Awpxey.. ‘M s-so tired.” Your teeth chattered as your eyes began to close. “Hey, hey Y/n, can you stay awake for me?” Your eyes barely moved, but Awpxey had seen that Amber yellow and was satisfied,

He ran a hand through your sweaty hair, wanting to find a place to kiss you that wouldn’t bother you.

Before he even could, the Tsahìk was standing in front of you both, she looked at you closely.

Eywa has said something to her in her heart about you, she took a liking to you. But looking at the state you were in, it tugged her heartstrings.

It… Shifted something within her.

But before any actions were made, you couldn’t hold back the bile that emitted from your stomach.

It fell right into the sand.

Right in front of the Tsahìk’s feet.

Soon after, your legs gave out, knees buckling as you fell into the sand, Awpxey falling with you while holding you close.

“I-I’m so sorry.” You chattered out.

How embarrassing…

Though after, your heart drooping to your ass as you realized this whole little thing could jeopardize your family staying here.

The Tsahìk was quick though.

“You,” she pointed to Awpxey. “Follow my healers to one of the healing maruis, I will continue here.”

You were pulled up slowly by Awpxey, as he followed two women who stepped from the crowd.

Your father looked as he seen you walk away, your legs barely strong enough to hold you up.

It made him ridicule himself.

How had he not noticed? How had he not seen you become like this when you hopped off Azraa?

His own questions floated, floated in what seems like a pit of too many things to remember and too many things to be doing.

It’s like if his brain is running out of storage, his head working up too much.

The bouncy sensations of the walkways that allowed the Metkayina to walk around their village did little, but a lot to help you.

As you walked, the bouncing gave you a bit of a cooling sensation from the warm sweat you felt breaking out on your body, but it sure as hell didn’t help that twisting feeling in your stomach.

You still felt sick.

By the time you had finally made it to the healing tents, and by the time the women had placed a good sized bowl in front of you… You had thrown up again into it, filling it up almost halfway. The healers looked shocked, but tried their best to just continue setting up whatever they needed to make a salve for you.

Awpxey held and guided your body to a free mat in the corner, trying to shade you from the Sun peeking harshly into the marui.

One of the young healers looked on at you two in a curious bewilderment. Watching the way Awpxey sweetly spoke to you and comforted you.

Is this what love looks like?

A gentle snap in front of her face was what she got as her answer.

“Aiya!” Another young healer whispered yelled the girl’s name, calling her attention and giggling at how she looked at the both of you.

“Instead of gawking, finish grinding the powder so we can add it to the medicine!” The young girl’s cheeks darkened at the word gawking.

What gawking? She wasn’t gawking was she?

“R-Right sorry! I wasn’t gawking though!” With a reluctant breath Aiya grounded the powder until it was thinner than it was before, slowly pouring and mixing it in with the medicine they were to give you.

“How about you go take it to her Eiya? Since you, you know, enjoyed staring at them earlier.” One girl joked, and even though it was supposed to be a joke. All the other girls quickly agreed, handing the medicine to Aiya before nudging her forward, and just leaving.

And leaving. Leaving. They just left, just like that. What friends they are. They know how hard it is for her to talk to strangers.

She walked hastily, trying her best to bring you the medicine to make you feel better without spilling it.

When she reached Awpxey’s back, she poked him.

“Mh.. Give this to her, have her drink it.” She held out the small bowl, and Awpxey took it gently, explaining what you needed to do before softly placing the bowl in front of your mouth.

Aiya wanted him to work quicker. She wanted to see you get better. She had this foreign, impatient urge to… Talk to you.

When you finally finished drinking the medicine, Awpxey making sure you had every last drop, you had taken a deep breath.

The twist in your stomach started to disappear, your skin started to feel less moist and finally cooled down, feeling how it usually did any day in the Sun.

“Wow..” You whispered astonished. “I feel so much better already!” You looked between Aiya and Awpxey.

“Thank you so much for that medicine, it’s really working!” You smiled at Aiya, slowly scanning your eyes around her face.

She’s really pretty.

It wasn’t said out loud, but you and Aiya had thought it at the same time as each other. But only looking into each others eyes, you both knew exactly what the other thought.

Awpxey noticed how the both of you seemed to have clicked, though he didn’t say anything, just let it play out as he noticed you and Aiya begin to smile shyly at each other.

The scene was interrupted when the Tsahìk came walking in, it was only now that you noticed her round belly. How did you not notice it earlier?

The Tsahìk’s eyes lock onto yours, and she stepped close to you. “Come, Y/n.” You were shocked at the fact she somehow even knew your name.

But you quickly didn’t care anymore, as you remembered that you were not there when the Olo’eyktan and the Tsahìk were deciding to either let your family stay, or leave.

When you finally get up, you stand next to her, impatient.

“I come to know your name now, but I forget his.” She nudges her chin towards Awpxey. “What is his name?”

Is she playing games with you? Knowing that you want to know whether you were granted Uturu or not. Yet instead she’s asking for your boyfriend’s name.

“Awpxey. His name is Awpxey.” You rush out.

She nodded, humming a quiet “hm” before she ushered him up with her hand.

“Come, let’s go.” Now you were really nervous.

Though you all paused when she turned around and faced the girl that was in the tent.

“Aiya, you come too.” You noticed how the girl’s face was at first shocked, then lit up. Her ears perked and listening as her tail swished lowly behind her.

Now it had to have been fine if she was coming too right?

You tried not to dwell on it too much as you followed the Tsahìk on the walkways, noticing you were walking deeper into the village and through the many maruis that were built over the mangrove roots.

She was leading you to a tent, right? This definitely isn’t the way you came. There’s no way she’s leading you out.

Awpxey noticed the furrow in your brow and had reached to hold your hand, holding it in that way you both found comfortable for the uneven amount of fingers you both had.

Aiya walked behind, her stomach warm as she watched the both of you hold hands.

She wants to hold your hand…

Her eyes widened as she rubbed her forehead, trying to wipe away those thoughts.

It had to be the stress and lack of sleep she has from becoming a healer. Right? Yeah, that’s it.

Suddenly, she stopped right in front of a tent not to far from the edge of the walkways.

The ocean was not too far, and the view looked so beautiful from where you stood.

When you had looked into the tent, before your foot even hit the floor of the inside, your father was rushing towards you.

“Y/n,” his hands came to your cheeks, holding your face and examining you lightly. “You feeling okay?” His tone only held worry as his eyes stayed focus on you.

You nodded with a small smile. “I’m okay dad, swear.”

His eyebrows dropped in relief, a breath exiting his mouth. “I’m sorry for not noticing babygirl, I’m sorry.” You shook your head, grabbing onto one of his hands on your face.

“It’s okay dad, it really is. You’re stressed, I know you are. And this really came out of no where, the sickness. Either way, I feel so much better now, promise.”

With a small smile, you held out your pinky, joining it with your dad. A happy little tradition your father taught you and the rest of your siblings.

Neytiri watched on behind your father with a smile. Watching how you and your father slowly started to get closer emotionally and bond more.

It made her happy, knowing that you want to be with the family more often.

Eywa knows how broken Jake was when you had separated yourself from everyone and everything at the ripe age of 12.

When you walked deeper into the marui, you thought it was beautiful. It was definitely different, something you were not used to.

But you knew that life comes with change. And with change comes adaptions and arranging.

You took a deep breath, looking around smiling at everybody. It was really pretty in here, and the floor felt good against your feet.

Neteyam huffed a small laugh as he walked past you. “I guess Y/n likes it.” You laughed as you bumped his shoulder as he walked by.

When you turned back to the entrance, the Tsahìk and Aiya were gone.

About an hour later, when you all were almost done with placing your belongings down and putting your stuff down to sleep, your dad called a ‘Sully Family Meeting’.

Lo’ak must have known because he was a hair away from successfully leaving the tent before Neteyam chased him out, and pulling him back in.

Kiri had an attitude as Neytiri called her, responding with a moody, “what”. As she sat down.

Tuk kneeled over a covered crate next to Jake, playing with her fingers as she took deep breaths.

After a moment of silence your dad had gotten serious. “I need you kids on your best behavior, I mean it.” He looked through all of you.

“Learn fast, pull your weight.” He looked straight into Lo’ak’s eyes as he said. “Don’t cause trouble, got it.”

Lo’ak responded with a ‘yes sir’ as he knew the demand was targeted towards him.

Neteyam chuckled before he reached over, squeezing the base of Lo’ak’s neck, pulling his hand back when Lo’ak hissed to him.

Lo’ak receiving a side-eye in return.

Though you didn’t pay much attention to that as Tuk spoke up, tears in her eyes as she stated she wanted to go home.

“Aw Tuk.” Your mother looked at her with sorrow, the same sorrow she felt in her heart.

Jake took her hand, holding one of her fingers. “Tuk.. This is our home now.” He paused before a spoke again.

“Now, we’re gonna get through this.” He nodded surely, Neytiri following along also.

“We’re gonna get through this if we have each others backs, alright?” Your mother cut in, adding a quiet, “what does your father always say?”

Hesitantly looking around, waiting for someone else to speak, you all said. “Sully’s stick together.”

Though it was all out of sync..

Your dad nodded, “yeah that’s right Sully’s stick together.” He looked at Neytiri before turning back to look at all of you.

“Now this time with some feeling, yeah?” Within a few seconds you all were repeating the quote, “Sully’s stick together”, a bit louder.

Although it was still out of sync, the effort from the rest of you was present.

Kiri was doing her own thing while she said it though. You could tell that she was feeling really dejected by moving away from the forest. Hell you were too, but you tried to tune your mind to accepting that there was no changing this.

Like your dad said, this is our home now.

As the rest of the day passed, you wondered what nightfall looked like around the village. You stayed around the exit of the marui, watching the sky as it darkened little by little.

Eclipse looked the same as it did from the forest — and that made you smile — though the environment was obviously different.

You wondered if sleeping here would feel more relaxing, since you’ve always heard people fall asleep to the sounds of the ocean. You decided on just not thinking about so you’ll be more patient. You couldn’t wait to see for yourself.

Falling asleep was not easy.

Though the sounds of the ocean moving directly under your new home was nice, it was.. So different.

You weren’t entirely used too it, at all.

You know it’s going to take a while to adapt.

The next morning after a quiet breakfast, the Olo’eyktan and Tsahìk’s son and daughter, Ao’nung and Tsireya came to retrieve you and your siblings to begin training they had a friend with them, you heard his name to be Rotxo.

And you had noticed the pretty healer was with them to, Aiya was her name right?

When you approached the waters edge, the four of them dived in, you and Awpxey looking quickly at each other before diving in next.

When you had opened your eyes under water, you were shocked, entranced at the beauty that was fulfilled in the ocean.

It was beautiful. So beautiful.

You could get used to this, you smiled. Oh definitely.

Awpxey and Aiya quietly stared, looking at you and how your beauty and essence seemed to mix in with the Sea of Pandora.

Looking over at Awpxey, you smiled, a few bubbles coming out your mouth as you reached your hand out to him. He took it happily, and you pulled him down towards the sea floor, deciding on wanting to look closely at the small animals that swam about.

Tsireya watched Aiya look at you and Awpxey attentively before she made a small clicking noise with her mouth, making Aiya turn to her.

Tsireya signed a worried ‘are you okay’ to her, waiting for an answer.

Aiya nodded quickly, signing back ‘I’m okay! Just looking at them, they are so cute together!’ Her face turning to a light shade of purple, though Tsireya only seen it as the waters reflection.

One thing about Aiya, she was good at playing certain things off.

Tsireya nodded happily in agreement before turning around and swimming off to catch up to the other siblings.

Aiya turned to the direction you and Awpxey were before, though she was only met with the sight of coral, a slight frown forming on her face.

That was before she had gotten a plan.

You were ecstatic, the little specimens that passed you and Awpxey every second made you kick your feet harder to swim with them, being careful touching certain things as you don’t know what’s good or what’s bad yet.

Your head turned quickly when you seen a certainly big figure move in your peripheral. You looked closely to see it was hair flowing as someone swam around.

From the outfit you could see it was Aiya, you swam towards her, going to her front to wave happily at her. Awpxey catching up a few minutes later as he was playing with a snail.

Aiya waved to the both of you, a smile on her face as she started moving her hands in a foreign motion.

Was it sign language? This looks a bit different though… You had learned the basics of sign language when you were younger and would visit Hell’s Gate with your father, but that was American Sign Language.

Was she signing in Na’vi? Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you tried to decipher what she was saying.

She seemed to notice your confusion and pointed up to the surface of the water, and made a ‘come’ motion.

You nodded, kicking up to the surface and taking a deep breath as you reached the top.

She popped up next, then Awpxey. Keeping yourself afloat you had asked her, “is that sign language? What you had used while we were under?”

She nodded, “it was! Sorry for just thinking you understand right away.” You shook your head, smiling. “It’s okay, when I was younger I was taught sign language but never in Na’vi, I only know the basic stuff in English.” You giggled.

She laughed too, “I should teach you! Well, if you want me to? It might be useful.” She looked at you, waiting for you to say what you think.

“No, yeah definitely! That would be great!” You agreed immediately. Aiya looked a bit shy as she brought her hand slightly out of the water, pointing lightly behind you to Awpxey. “And him? Does he want to learn too?”

Looking behind yourself, you seen Awpxey staring up at the sky his eyes scrunched from the Sun as you can tell he was looking at the clouds.

You turned back towards her, laughing. “He’s a bit dumb, but I think he’ll like learning.” She smiled, nodding. “Let’s go to those group of rocks over there, there is a few more things you need to learn, like breathing.”

Following her, you had to turn around to bring Awpxey as he stayed looking at the sky, messing with him you pulled his hair, making him gasp as he attempted to chase you.

As Aiya stood on the rocks, she was able to see how quickly you were able to evade Awpxey in the water.

Laughing and out of breath you climbed onto the rock she was standing on, you paused as you seen her hand outstretched, but you grabbed it just in time because when she pulled you up Awpxey appeared right where you were.

Your heart was pumping amd you held your hand over it as you realized where he was. “He almost grabbed me Aiya, you saved me.” She was smiling amd nodding, but her heart felt like it was about to fall through her rib cage.

You were still holding her hand.

The cool water that was dripping from her hair to her body did nothing to cool down her skin that was beginning to grow hot.

When Awpxey was now trying to climb up the rock, she held out her hand again, acting without thinking. She was close to letting out a squeak as Awpxey clapped his hand against hers, the both of them pulling at each other to get him on the rock.

You knew.

You knew you were still holding her hand, and you swung her hand back and forth in yours, letting her know you were fully aware.

“Hey Aiya?” She turned to you, her neck stiff as tried to ignore her hand swinging together with yours. “Yeah Y/n?”

“Can we all swim a bit more? I really like how it looks underwater.” You smile shyly.

“Of course!” She nodded, you don’t have to ask me, let’s go.” You skipped excitedly to the end of the rock, making sure there wasn’t any other ones you looked at the two of them.

“Let’s jump at the same time!” Awpxey nodded quickly, tightening his hold on Aiya’s hand before lining all of you up.

Aiya’s heart was going through an overdrive. What is even happening?

After a quick countdown she was now submerged, which put her back into reality quick. Swimming through the water she found you in front of her, swimming towards the ground again.

She noticed you liked playing with the coral, running your hands over the bumpy edges and following the small fish that swam by.

After swimming around and playing for a bit, there was a clicking noise heard underwater. From what you could decipher it sounded like an animal, so you looked around curiously, expectantly.

The clicking didn’t raise anything for alarms, the clicking sounded sweet, almost as if it were only calling out. Trying to track where it was coming from, you spotted something move underwater,

You squinted your eyes quickly trying to focus, it went behind a big section of coral that wasn’t too far from in front of you, so you swam toward it.

Several seconds passed, and then a creature, almost as resembling as an ikran came from around the corner.

Your eyes widened in excitement as a smile pulled onto your face.

The animal swam towards you, gliding through the water gracefully as it approached you, placing its face close to yours, making you “cheek”-cheek with the still clicking animal.

In this moment you were beyond ecstatic, seeing a sea creature this beautiful approach you so calmly and swim around you as it nuzzled itself into your cheek.

You noticed the animals Tsaheylu pocket and gripped it gently, grabbing your queue from behind your head before you connected them softly.

Tsaheylu underwater was no joke, you almost swallowed gallons of water trying to get used to the familiar though unfamiliar sensation that was passing through your nerves system.

Testing, you gave the soft direction to swim up to the surface, and up you went, put not blazing fast. The animal pulled you at a soft but firm pace, bringing you to the oceans top like you had asked.

As you surfaced, you gasped for air before letting out an excited squeak. Looking around for any signs of Awpxey and Aiya also resurfacing. When they popped out of the water next, they both had huge thrilled smiles.

“Y/n!” They called out at the same time before swimming to you, racing somewhat.

“Guys! Guys! Look it! Look what I got!” The creature you still did not know the name of spun you on its back, letting out its own excited trills of sounds.

“Good job Y/n! The way it approached you so easily, she sensed you!” Aiya subconsciously reached for your hand. “She sensed your kind energy and strong heart.” Aiya rambled with a smile. Awpxey swam up next to the both of you, placing his hand on your knee. “Good job Tìyawn, see? You always claim you are not that special, but here we are!”

You thanked him, looking down at the creature with a shy smile, a blush accompanying your face. “What are they called?” You looked up to Aiya, softly petting the creature’s rough skin.

“They are called Ilu. A common sea animal used by many of the Metkayina for hunting, traveling and such.” You nodded, listening intently.

“They are so beautiful..” You whispered, silently admiring the eye of your Ilu, that was before she squeaked, showing her excitement.

Mid-day was approaching, and swimming for hours on end left you starved. So for lunch you and your family returned to your maruì.

For Aiya though, she thought it as unfortunate that you and Awpxey had to part ways with her.

Was it selfish? Somewhat, right?

She shook the thoughts in her head away as she was telling herself you both had to leave. Obviously to eat and nourish yourself so she can see you.

After you completely inhaled your lunch as you bragged and raved about how you tamed an Ilu, you happily stepped out your new living space.

Squinting your eyes against the Sun, you all walked to the area you agreed to meet Ao’nung and Tsireya at, you didn’t fail to see the way Lo’ak’s slouched shoulders straightened quickly once she came into view.

Hm. You tried to hold in a smile as you looked at the back of his head.

Looks like Lo’ak’s got a crush.

The rest of the day was spent learning how to properly hold your breath, learning more facts about the Ilu you are learning to ride, and information and traditions of the Metkayina.

As eclipse started to approach everyone headed home.

Everyone but you, Aiya, and Awpxey.

All the way until the stars infiltrated the sky, the three of you sat and talked about any and everything.

Maybe adapting won’t be so hard.

Hi everyone! Thank you so much for reading all this!! I did say it was going to be a long one, but I hoped you enjoyed it! Sorry for taking so long to update!! Two months? I’m actually sorry because during those 2 months I have gained many followers and I feel like I’m not doing much! So this is me back in commission!! Also, how do you guys feel about Aiya? How should I continue with her? But anyway! Thank you for reading 🤍!!

49 notes · View notes

izumi-fanclub · 6 months

Text

A3! Event Story Translation “NEW ERA GARDEN” [Chapter 6]

These old men got so much drama even I'm stressed out 💀

Yukio

I think Soji Okita isn’t inhuman, rather, a soldier who clung dearly to his life.

Reni

I want to show off Okita’s way of life beautifully.

Yukio

Reni, I want to see your more human and flawed Soji!

Kasumi

…Wait, more fighting from the two of you this time? Are you good?

Yuzo

I think they’re both getting heated up since they wanna make the performance good. Maybe it’s best to leave them be.

Reni

I have to disagree with what you’re saying, I just can’t picture it.

If you insist on it so much, you do it then.

Yukio

——...

Even if I do it, it’s not the same Soji Okita who’ll bloom the way Reni does.

Reni

…

*Syu claps to get rid of the tension in the air*

Syu

Alright alright, let’s take a break here.

Reni

——.

Yukio

You’re right, my bad. I’ll go buy a few drinks.

Reni

…

Syu

Looks like you guys reverted back to the old days too.

Reni

No way. At my age, I can’t afford to get mad.

Syu

I sure hope so.

(But I had to step in between them again.)

(——Back then, I was the same as I am now, and got dragged into it too.)

I had never liked Yukio Tachibana since I first joined the troupe, even after Reiji left the troupe, I had a hard time changing my mind about him. The reason I even joined MANKAI Company was because Reiji asked me to.

Should I even continue starring in the play without him?

At that time I was worried when he left the theater, wondering if he’ll be replaced by someone new, we didn’t have much contact anymore.

I blamed it all on Yukio Tachibana for befriending him.

My frustrations built up so much I felt like I could have a heart attack, so I avoided any contact with Yukio for a while, as much as possible.

The first day of the Winter Troupe’s performance comes amidst the circumstances,

I ignored all of Yukio’s directional orders and acted on my own selfish impulses during the production.

My actions were 100% anti-Yukio, I moved immaturely without thinking about the members of the troupe.

After the performance, Yukio came up to me as I was changing, looking calm as ever.

“...Was that the way you wanted to bloom, Syu-san?”

Interrupted, I nodded in frustration.

“I see… That’s fine.”

Yukio said quietly, it felt like I was caught in a lie.

I wasn’t thinking about the stage at all.

I just wanted to take out my frustrations on Yukio.

That must’ve been the worst thing I could have done as an actor.

It was the biggest mistake in my long career as an actor since I was a child.

Eventually, not just the Winter Troupe got worried, but the other troupes members were concerned as well, that’s when I came to my senses.

Soon after, I followed through with the original directions the next day and continued to perform.

I thought about what a total sham of an actor I’ve become.

Then, when the final days of the performance came, Yukio stopped by again.

I’d rather get punished for the show I put on the first day, or better yet, get kicked out of the troupe entirely.

Just when I made up my mind about it, Yukio’s next words came as a shock to me.

“I’m thinking of having you play the lead role in the next Winter Troupe play.”

“Hah?”

“I got the idea after seeing your performance on the first day. It doesn’t fit this performance, but it showed a new side of Syu-san.”

“The darker side of Syu-san, who’s always cynical and masculine, was hidden away…

I was thrilled to think that even in that kind of direction, you might flourish onstage. Perhaps I was a little caught up in stereotypes. So I’d like to try a new take on your play in the next show.”

Yukio said all that with a twinkle in his eyes…

At the same time as I was swayed by his courage, I also realized that I really didn’t like this guy.

Even in the most tough situations, he sees through his opposition calmly and follows his heart as a director and theater artist rather than his own personal feelings.

It was a far cry from me, who almost ruined the play with my personal grudges.

As a theater guy, I couldn’t help but grind my teeth.

I didn’t like him as a person, but as a theater artist, I respected him and thought that’s what I want to be.

That's why, I decided I couldn’t end things there.

At that moment, I swore to myself that I wouldn’t quit the troupe… until I’ve stolen all I can learn from this man.

Reni

…Cheers.

Syu

Yukio and Hiro are also going out for drinks today.

Reni

It seems they take turns in inviting one another during rehearsals. Another thing I can’t quite comprehend.

Syu

It was interesting that he happened to invite Yuzo to a drink first.

Reni

To be fair, they don’t really get the chance that often.

Syu

Yuzo, me, now Hiro, then Zen next. Has he already invited you too, Reiji?

Reni

…We already made plans to go well before rehearsals began, there’s nothing that needs to be said between us now.

Syu

I think you two need to make up and take the time to discuss Soji Okita’s image and compromise on something.

Reni

…And your own image of Toshizo Hijikata is?

Syu

About that…

I also talked about it with Yukio the other day when we had drinks here.

Yukio

He differs as a leader compared to the straightforward Isami Kondo, he will do whatever it takes to achieve his goals in an open-minded way…

I think that kind of image best suits you, Syu-san.

Even back in the first generation, you thought more about the stage than your own personal feelings, you always put yourself first as an actor and a performer, right?

I think I saw Hijikata in you…

Syu

(...This man got no idea I learned it all from him, though.)

Reni

An open-minded approach, huh… I see.

Syu

…Speaking of, I secretly informed the members of the first Winter Troupe about the occasion.

Reni

…We settled on making this confidential.

Syu

Come on, GOD-za knows about it too anyway, don’t they?

Reni

…

Some mishaps happened last time in “Traces of a Dream”, so I couldn’t tell them in advance.

Syu

Because of Yukio’s indiscriminate cast scouting, many of the first gen actors had jobs on the side and didn’t really have an intention of making a living doing theater anyway.

Even though most of them aren’t in the industry now, they were all happy.

Even if they’re not in theater, even if they’re not on the stage now, we won’t ever change. We’ll always be the friends who were once on the same stage.

The bonds of a relationship aren’t something you can completely break off… That’s the conclusion I came to after witnessing the newborn troupe.

Reni

…

Syu

…For all that we’ve lost, we still gained something. You’re one of those, aren’t you?

Reni

…Yes.

…However, there are times where I recall that I was once lost.

Syu

The Soji in your mind is Yukio, isn’t it?

Reni

…

An aspiration that will be never fulfilled, an idol.

That was all I could think about and follow throughout the rehearsal.

I vowed to stop chasing after what I’ve lost… I’ve sworn on it.

Syu

Talk to Yukio and open up before the actual show starts. He reminisces about the past, too.

That’s why I’m telling you, you have to let him talk this time.

[ Prev. ]

[ Next ]

#a3 translation #a3! translation #a3! event story translation #a3 event story translation #yukio tachibana #reni kamikizaka #reiji kamikizaka #kasumi hinamori #yuzo kashima #syu otomiya #act 3.5

29 notes · View notes

justimagineok · 1 year

Text

2:30 series - 🕑 2:26

Summary: One too sure, the other not that much. One focused on the present, the other too stuck on the past and afraid of the future. Both of them in love with each other.

Recommended song: Start by Sam MacPherson

Genre: bit of angst but lots of fluff :)

A/N: feedback is always appreciated! feel free to reblog, comment or send me an ask at anytime 😊

next>

“The second you stop hoping that your usual self sabotage ruins this

And maybe that falling in love might be good for your heart

I’ll do my best to pretend I didn’t already start

falling, falling, falling, falling

...

I know that you’ve got some hesitations well I’ve got

More reasons why we should be together than should not

I know falling wasn’t part of your plan but

I can’t act like I’m not if I am “

"Are you sure you wanna talk about it? It's okay if you don't, babe."

"No, I want it. I need to talk about it. It's just hard to explain... I don't know where to start..", Jungkook nods, reaching for your hand and kissing it. “Start from the beginning."

You nodded, taking a deep breath. "Do you believe my mother told me I was adopted my whole life?", Jungkook froze hearing those words. He didn't know you were adopted.

"You never told me that.", he said, reaching for your other hand and squeezing it. You gave him a half smile, explaining it better.

"I'm not adopted, Kook."

Jungkook was confused to say the least. "I don't understand, babe."

"She and my father told me that just to play with me. With my head.", you shook your head like you were trying to push away something bad from it.

"What? Why?"

"For 21 years of my life, they told me I was adopted... that my 'real parents' didn't want me and that they thought adopting a kid was an act of mercy, but that they regretted it."

Jungkook was stunned. He had so many questions, but couldn't voice any of them, so he just waited.

"I asked them so many times if they knew who my real parents were, but they always dodge off the question.", you smiled bitterly, remembering your mother saying about how she wasn't gonna let you ruin any other life but theirs.

Jungkook caressed your back gently, comforting you. "You don't have to keep talking if you don't want, babe. It's okay."

"No. I want to.", you assured him. "One day, when she was really pissed off at me... I can remember perfectly. She and my dad kept asking me for money to 'invest', but I know it wasn't for that. Never was. They always wanted more and more and more. So I said no.", you made a pause. It was embarrassing talking about those stuff with Jungkook, but if you wanted to be completely honest from now on, you needed to talk to him about it. Even if it hurt. You knew Jungkook wasn't the type to pity anyone, and you could only hope he wouldn't pity you too. "Then she slapped me in the face a few times, pulling my hair and screaming the weirdest curses at me. Always something about desiring that I'd cry tears of blood for being so bad at her, or wishing I became just as unhappy as her... Nothing I wasn't used to hear. But then... then she told me that it was all a lie."

If you closed your eyes, you could still smell the room you were in that day.

"What are you talking about, mother?"

"I'm telling you that WE are your real parents, stupid", your mom mocked, giving you another smack in the head.

"I don't understand... Why would you lie to me about something like that, for so many years?", you didn't get it. It was a prank, right? She was kidding. Your real parents were out there, probably thinking about you. Maybe regreting they gave you away.

"Why?!", she looked at your father, who was just sitting there, watching the whole thing, without saying anything. You never seen him give a real smile, never. But you saw him giving you a smirk that day. "Because we knew you would believe. It was so easy."

"But how can you trust they're telling the truth?", Jungkook asked as he scratched his eyebrow due to nervousness." That you're not really... adopted?"

"I took a test. Four to be exact.", you looked at him. By now, you expected to see at least a hint of pity in Jungkook's eyes, but you found none. He wasn't about to cry, or breathing heavily, but you noticed something different about them... was it... wrath?

"They're my biological parents.", you clarified finally. "You have any idea how that fucked up my mind? The nights I spent wondering why my parents would leave me, how they were, who they were... it was all a lie. And the way they laughed at me...", you closed your eyes.

The mind was a powerful thing. It could make you feel like you were back there just like that. On really bad days, you would sleep and have nightmares with your mother's voice mocking you.

"I had no idea,", Jungkook eyes fills with tears, and he's ready to cry, but he holds himself. How he could not notice in how much pain you were? You still are. Instead, he focused on his own pains and blamed you for leaving him. "Oh my God.. The things I said to you...", Jungkook has no words.

"No.", you stop him. "You have no fault in any of this, Kook. This is one of the reasons why I never wanted you to know. I'm embarrassed about my past and my story, Kook. I feel like I'm a clown and not worthy of anything good and that sounds very self loathing, and maybe it is... I'm trying to deal with all that and get better, but it's just how I feel sometimes. I don't want you to feel guilty about anything", you squeezed his hands as Jungkook let the tears fall from his eyes. "I thought that I wasn't supposed to share pain. That, sometimes it was best just to deal with it alone. That's what I believed."

Jungkook shook his head, looking at you. "I don't agree with you at all, YN. When you're in a relationship you share love, kindness and all of that good stuff, but you also have to share pain, sadness, the ugly stuff too. And I'm so, so sorry you had to suffer through all of that...."

"I know.", you agreed. "Usually, I'd say it's okay and that I'm fine, but it's not, you know?", you looked at him and the tears kept falling from his eyes. Jungkook wanted to stop crying, but he couldn't. He couldn't. He wasn't feeling guilty, he was fucking angry that your parents could do something like that to you. He was so upset and pissed off and hurt. Hurt to know that you've been dealing with this for so long, as he just kept living his life. He knows it wasn't his fault, but you, the person he loves, were hurting from so many fucked up things and there was nothing he could do but be there. It wasn't enough. If he could just go back in the past and change it. But he couldn't.

You told him about the days when both of them drank and allied to mess with you. They screamed your name and cursed at you, calling you the most horrifying names, yelling about how you would never be anyone or wanted by anyone 'cause you were too ugly, too fat, too much. Too sensitive, too bad. You remember coming home from your old work, just wanting to eat and sleep, but they'd been already drunk and ready to ruin the rest of your night. You remember the day you when warming up some food on the stove and your mother came suddenly, throwing the pan on the ground with the food on it. She slammed it so hard that ever since that day, there was a small crack on the ground. You always looked at the crack and remembered the day. You told him about your father always threatening to tell your neighbors about how bad of a daughter you were and about your little schemes, except you've got none. You didn't have the courage to date or bring anyone home, ashamed of your parents. You didn't believe in hookups, so you just settled for staying alone. It was better that way. You couldn't risk it. You told him about the days you when you were sleeping, and they started to kick your door, startling you off. Your heart beat so fast that you couldn't sleep for the rest of the night. You didn't trust the door on keeping you safe, and you got no one to help you at the time. Your aunt that lived across from you helped you sometimes when you were little, bringing to stay at her house until they 'calmed down', but you were a grown up now. She couldn't defend you anymore.

You felt helpless.

You felt alone and unworthy, cause after all, if your own parents treated you like that, it must be something wrong with you, right?

How unlovable a person could have born to be so mistreated like you were? You knew some people had way worse lives than you did, but this was your life. What you received. You couldn't tell about any other experiences but your own.

That was one of the reasons why you decided to work helping kids and adolescents. Protect them as you could.

Maybe they'd live a better life than you did.

You told Jungkook about the call of your mother when you were still dating, the day she went to your work... the days your father stayed at your work, waiting for you on the parking lot. The same day Jungkook picked you up.

You told all of that to Jungkook and listened to it all. He nodded and asked some questions, and you explained. You told him everything you could. Everything that hurt.

You saw the tears falling from his eyes as you told him about your life, your fears, your panics and how frighten you are to become like them. Jungkook didn't hide his tears from you, instead, he held your hand tight and dried his eyes with the other. He would never let go of your hand again, he promised himself, and not out of guilt or a bad conscience, but because he loves you completely, fucked up past and all.

"I'm not okay, Kook.", you said finally. "Cause every time I feel like I'm finally moving on, my mind pulls me back there... and I don’t want to live like this, but I can’t imagine living any other way.", you confess to him and Jungkook holds your hand tighter.

"We’ll figure it out.", he assures you confidently, drying his tears. "I know I can't fix a damn thing and God knows I wish I could, babe.", he closed his eyes in frustration. Frustration with himself for being so powerless in this situation, frustration with your parents for being so crap at their job. "I can't fix a lot of things, but what I can do is stay by your side in every step of the way. And yeah, I know how cheesy this sounds, but I mean it. I mean it from all my heart. You deserve better, YN. Better than the bad parents you have, better than the way they treated you. Nothing is wrong with you to feel like this. I think I would feel like this too if it was with me, but I can't say that because it's not me. But, I have no doublts things will get better because you're the stronger person I know, and you have no fucking clue how much I admire you and your strength." , his words were like an avalanche, dismantling all the walls you placed between your shame of your past and him. "I used to feel pissed when I saw you standing up for people and never getting any return from them, but I think that's one of the reasons why I love you so fucking much. So I'm willing to change that aspect of me. I'll protect you as you protect others, 'cause that's what you've been doing for me since the day we met. You help me see the world from a different aspect, help me not to get lost in this world of superiority that surrounds me. You love me for who I am, and that makes all the difference to me, YN. So, yeah, we’ll get through this together. And don't be surprised when you wake up one day and discovered that you're fully happy. With your heart and mind at peace and me, right there, sleeping and drooling by your side. ", he laughs and you laugh too. "You'll be even happier, babe, and not because of me, or despite your parents, but because you have the talent to reinvent yourself, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you as you do that. I want to love you in each of these moments."

How he could be like that? Still loving and worrying about you after all you guys been through? After what you put him through?

"I have no words to thank you, Kook. I mean it.", you start to cry and Jungkook pulls you to his arms.

"You never have to thank me for that, YN.", he declares. "Now, let's go home."

"Home?"

"Yes,", Jungkook pulled a distance so he could look at you. "Your home. With me. Our home."

"Kook, how can I stay with you knowing I'm the reason you lost so much?", you look at your feet and Jungkook's heart shrink. You're talking about his accident. "You say you can forgive me for that, but I can't."

"Babe.", he held your chin softly, making you look at him. "It wasn't your fault. I'm a dick for saying that to you, knowing very well it wasn't true. I was so angry and hurt... desperate to know if you could really recover that I chose to hurt you and push you away instead of just facing it. I couldn't bear the feeling that you were there out of pity, even when you said you weren't.. But none of this is an excuse. So I'm the one who should ask for forgiveness. And I am. Please forgive me, YN. Let's stop hurting each other and just stay together. I think all this time apart was enough punishment. Haven't we suffered enough? Can't we have this one good thing?"

"I-"

"If you really don't want me- no other excuses, just me- just tell me right now, and I'll understand.", Jungkook trembled while saying that, afraid you'd believe him. But he had to know you were going to stay from now on. He needed that. "Tell me and we'll be done. Otherwise, start getting used to the fact that you can't protect me from things, YN. I am not made of glass. I can handle myself. I have enough strength to take care of me and you, so that's not a job you gotta do alone. It's okay for you to worry about me, 'cause I do the same with you, but it's not okay for you to choose what I'm capable of handling or not." he gave a step forward, looking into your eyes. "And if we both want to be together, we're going to fuckin' be together."

"So what... we're friends now?", you asked, laying down on the couch in Jungkook's arms. You two haven't spoken yet about where exactly you're both in.

Jungkook glanced at you, smiling. He would be happy to have you in any way you wanted. But having you on his chest, waking up with your texts, and going to bed knowing you were to the touch of a hand was amazing. He wanted you both to be in a relationship again, and he thought you did too, but what if he's wrong?

"Hmmm..", he dropped his phone on the corner of the couch." we could be friends that kiss, and hold hands and have sex."

You both laughed loudly as Jungkook hugged you tight.

"Can I be real for a moment?", he asked, as he kept holding you in his arms.

"Sure."

“Sometimes I get scared, you know?", he says slowly, and you make space between you two, so you can look at him. Jungkook continued. "Giving us this chance again scares me a little.”

His eyes drop, embarrassed to confess something like that. Your heart ached to hear those words, but you couldn't say you didn't understand him. It scared you too.

"It hurt me, YN.", Jungkook kept going. He needed to let that out of his chest, so he could move on. So you both could move on in peace. "Whenever you kept things from me, it fucking hurt. Ignoring it didn’t make them go away. It only made it harder to face them when they finally came around to beat the shit out of us."

Your heart skipped a beat with the way he referred to your problems as his too.

"What I'm saying is... don't stop communicating with me.", he looked at you.

"I won't.", you nodded in agreement. "I'm sorry."

Jungkook shook his head again.

"We say sorry a lot to each other... It’s always I’m sorry.", he looked at you with a serious face. "I’m tired of being sorry, babe. I want us to work together, so we don't have to say it all the time, you know? I want us to be strong."

art by gyung studio

#2:30 #jungkook x reader #jungkook x y/n #jungkook x you #jungkook x yn #jk x you #jk x reader #jk x y/n #jk x oc #jungkook fiction #jungkook fluff #jungkook fic recs #bts fake texts #bts fic #bts fake chat #bts fake chats #bts scenarios #bts

58 notes · View notes

melloncreamsoda · 2 years

Text

Second years when you get a bad haircut

TW/CW: crack, GN!Reader, headcanons

extra; ive been crying over mine for two days there's no reason my hairdresser fucked uo such a sinple style bro crying emoji and i will also find any excuse to write about the octotrio anyway i hope u enjoy!!

You wanted to change up your current hairstyle, it was simple really– just a little off what you already had. But no! The hairdresser just had to find some way to fuck the entire thing up. You really thought that everything would be different, especially in another universe; but at this point you can't tell if you aren't being clear enough, or it’s truly in the veins of a hairdresser to do everything wrong. Your eyes are puffy from crying all night but time isn’t going to stop for you. You wear a hoodie over your uniform, as well as a hat underneath– you were not going to take any chances, especially being in a school full of rowdy boys who know no limits.

Riddle Rosehearts

Homeboy quite literally does not give a fuck, or so it seems.

Riddle is sheltered, and has not seen the many of the wonders of the world. So seeing your hair in such an eyesore of a state– he had to take 5.

But of course he is a gentleman and definitely isn’t one to disregard your feelings.

Need a better coverup in place of your hat? He has a shitload and will not hesitate to spend money if necessary.

“It’s not as bad as you think I prom- What do you mean my face is red!?”

Ruggie Bucchi

He’s seen worse, from where he’s from.

A little bad haircut won’t change how he sees you anyway, even if he might be teasing about it and snicker while looking at you from time to time.

It’s all in good fun though… unless you’re sensitive, but he can’t promise he’ll put a complete stop to it! He just wants to lighten the mood, I promise.

Hair grows back eventually, right? Don’t let one shitty haircut ruin your entire week.

“...Anyway have I told you about that one time where I was getting chased by stallholders and accidentally ripped a chunk of my hair off? Yeah, had a bald spot for months.”

Azul Ashengrotto

Wanna sign your life away to him?

Is what he’s implying when he says that “he makes a mean hairstylist.”

Well unless he’s feeling nice, he might just offer to cover your absences from school and write notes for what you missed out on.

But there’s only a slim chance that he will not be asking for payment after this whole phase passes.

Azul will try to reassure you, though he isn’t the best at it.

“It’s… unique..! Some people would love your hairstyle. Eh- to have? Well…”

Floyd Leech

He knows no mercy.

He is going to rip your hood off or either snatch your hat and put it in highest corners he knows you won't be able to reach.

However, even if you do, by chance, get it back, your joy will only be short lived. He can easily sneak up on someone and running away will be no big deal with those long legs of his.

One upside to this, is that he doesn’t bother to snap any shots of your very vulnerable state; reason being that he enjoys watching the raw, sheer terror on your face whenever you sense his presence nearby.

As sadistic and twisted– in its own way– as it is, seeing his blinding smile and hearing his boyish laugh can’t help but make you smile and have fun alongside him.

So maybe the bad haircut isn’t that bad after all.

“Shrimpy! Catch me if you can… If you feel like touring the whole school of your fresh cut, heheh!”

Jade Leech

He’s trying his best to reassure you that you’re being much too harsh on yourself, I promise… Even if that means he’s trying his best to bite back a grin whenever you bring it up.

It’s not that you look bad, it’s just the way that you’re so obsessed with it reminds him of him when he was younger– once he got a bad haircut and cried about it for a week.

He does try to steer your attention away from the bad haircut to the best of his abilities; perhaps it’s the feeling of dejavu that he wants nothing more than to protect you from self doubt.

You’re his wittle bittwle precious gemstone and will make sure that you never hear of a bad haircut ever again!

“It’s alright Dear, I promise. I’ll take you to a much better, extravagant salon. Unless you are able to put your trust in my unrefined talent? Fufufu…”

Kalim Al-Asim

In all honesty, he doesn’t see an issue with it. He just can’t understand why you think it’s so horrible.

But if you really insist and won’t shut up about it, he’ll snag this opportunity to introduce you some of the most glamorous or simple headpieces back from his hometown!

He has everything to cater to your wants and needs, and you best expect that he milk every opportunity, especially for his beloved.

Even if it means giving Jamil more work to prevent him from overspending… but hey! It's the thought that counts

“Hey hey! Look at this, I think it's really gonna help to accentuate your features! Of course it’ll cover your hair… :(“

Jamil Viper

He doesn’t really care, or is let alone even free enough to notice.

But if you make enough noise about it, he might not even bat an eye towards it.

He assures you that you look fine, and might even place a chaste kiss on your cheek to get you to shut up if you whine too much about it.

Maybe he’ll try to fix it, maybe he won’t, perhaps he’ll even spare you a glance for a good heart chuckle every once in a while.

“Please stop making such a mes- FINE you have my attention.”

Silver

Does not care now, and I don't think he ever will.

Hair will grow back, but if you really want, you could hide under his shirt or something…

He’s practically half asleep all the time, so your hair will be back to normal before he even knows it.

He’ll draw his sword to protect you from any potential teasing if you really dislike it, granted that he’s fully awake at the time.

“Just lie down for a bit, I don't like seeing a frown on such a pretty face.”

#twisted wonderland #twst x reader #twst fluff #riddle rosehearts #kalim al asim #jamil viper #floyd leech #ruggie bucchi #jade leech #azul ashengrotto #twst silver #twst headcanons #melona.docx

163 notes · View notes

oh-surprise-its-me · 8 months

Text

I got a text from my own estranged father that made me pissed, it made me wish for a better father again so I’m taking it out on Ron. Sorry. 💞 *me basically taking a box of angry emotional bees and tossing them at Ron*

@aki-draws-things

TW: reference to child abuse. Ron definitely is having a panic attack during this.

Ron can’t stop shaking. He’s curled on the bathroom floor. He had just put Jake down for bed. The little two month old baby cries the most heartbreaking sounds.

Ron isn’t sure he can do this.

He has no model figure of what a dad should be. He’s going to fuck this kid up more then anything else he’s ever fucked up in the world.

“Ron?”

They’re too good for him. He’s going to be just like his father. Going to drag them down until they’re shells of the people they were. Hurt them in ways he can’t even think of yet.

He hears more voices talking. He can’t understand a single thing being said to him. He can only feel the tears going down his face.

Weak.

All he hears is his fathers voice in his head.

He wishes he had a good father. God he craves what he could’ve had. Why couldn’t his dad be good. Why. Why did Ron get punished just for being a kid. For asking his dad a question. For playing with toys.

“Ron!”

He looks straight up at that. Tommy. Great Tommy. Kind Tommy who took him in when he should’ve just died outside. Tommy who dragged him back to life when Ron felt nothing inside.

Behind him he sees Chris. Their little star. Ron doesn’t deserve either of them.

Chris is too good. Too perfect for him to taint. He can’t ruin Chris. Selfishly he thinks he’s already probably ruined Tom so what’s one more hug.

He hears Jake wake back up and cry, they both stand there without moving. “Go get him why are you still here? Go.”

Chris almost flinches at the tone of the words.

Great Ron. You’re such a fucking idiot. Hurt them with words before you hit them. Great. It’s in your dna might as well start early.

Tom yanks Ron into a standing position. “Ron? You in there?”

Tom and Chris both had watched as Ron put Jake to bed. He had a different look in his eye tonight. He had stumbled past them with a look Tom had only seen ever in relation to Ron’s dad. Chris and Tom both went after him.

“Sunshine what happened?” Ron gives a small smile at the nickname. Somehow they’re in their bed now. Chris still isn’t back. Good. He should be running away with Jake. Take him so far away that Ron can’t ever hurt him. It might kill Tom but he’d understand if it meant protecting Jake. “Ron!”

Ron startles. He blinks at Tom. “Uh. Keep thinking about my dad. How I’m going to be like him. Don’t wanna hurt you guys. Can’t hurt Jake. You’ve gotta promise me Tommy. Promise that you’ll end me if I ever hurt Chris or Jake.”

Tom has tears running down his face, he pulls Ron into his arms. “Baby you’d never hurt them. And you’re nothing like your dad. He was evil. You’re sunshine.” Ron smiles at the pun. There’s a voice from the doorway. “Ron you’re more protective of Jake then both me and Tom. You’d do anything for that kid. From what I know that means you’re nothing like your dad.”

Chris slips into bed curling around Ron’s back, he presses a kiss into Ron’s neck. “It’ll be okay. You’ll feel better in the morning. You’re running on too little sleep.” Ron laughs. They’re all on too little sleep. What’s new about that. “Shouldn’t be a dad. Always wanted kids but what if I fuck him up.”

“Oh baby. That’s every good parents fear. If you’re not scared about fucking him up you don’t care.” Tom nods, he brushes the hair out of Ron’s face, its grown so far past regulation. Jake likes reaching a hand up and grabbing it.

Tom presses a kiss to Ron’s eyebrow. “You wouldn’t let Jake sleep on you if you were a bad dad. Wouldn’t pick him up when he cries. Would tell him to be quiet but instead you tell him to make all the noise he wants. You want to be there for all the doctor appointments, all the small little things. You care about that kid.”

Chris nods, “he’s your kid as much as ours Ron. He’s going to be a combo of the three of us. Your father be damned that’s your kid. You raise him how you want.”

Ron feels like crying again. He throws an arm behind himself to pull Chris closer. He shoves his face into Tom’s chest. “Sorry I freaked. Got a letter from my cousin the other week. Shredded it. He talked too much about my dad.” Tom hums, he glances over Ron’s head and looks at Chris.

They both know this isn’t going to be fixed like that but they also know their Ron. He would rather toss himself off a bridge then hurt any of them. Emotionally or physically. He’d never.

Chris thinks he’ll ask David and Lucas to watch Jake tomorrow night so they can show Ron how much they trust and love him.

Ron drifts off. Tom slips out of bed to grab a wash cloth to wipe the tears off his face with. Chris holds into Ron tighter. Their giant fool. The best thing that ever happened to them.

When Tom comes back he looks a bit better. He runs a hand down Chris’s arm. “Love you. Sorry he freaked.” Chris shakes his head, “love you too but it’s not like you knew that would happen. It’s been a long week. Lots of emotions. It’ll be fine.”

They all drift off into sleep.

Ron looks embarrassed in the morning. He’s holding Jake and feeding him when they find him. “You okay baby?” Ron nods. He presses a quick kiss to Jake’s head. “Yeah. Sorry about last night. It was all too much.” Tom gently flicks Ron’s ear. “No sorry for your feelings. It’s okay. It’s always okay.”

Chris nods. He kisses Ron. “You’re feelings always are important. Especially when you’re feeling that bad. It’s okay baby.”

Ron looks like be might cry happy tears this time. But Jake interrupts them. The baby babbles at Tom, of course the man takes him from Ron. The other two can only look on with joy. “See. You’re good with him. He’s just a baby. They’re all weird sometimes.”

“Tommy don’t call our kid weird.”

“Chris he has three dads he’s a little weird.” Ron laughs at that. It’s nice to hear the word dads. He never thought it was a possibility. “I love you all. Thank you for making me a dad even if I did freak out about it last night.”

Tom laughs. “Course Sunny. Love both of you too.” He leans down and kisses Jake’s cheek. “Thank you baby for making me a tata. Love you.”

Chris slips into Ron’s lap. He grabs Ron’s face and holds on. “You’re our husband. Jakes father. Not that man’s son. He has no power over you. You’re ours. Not his. I love you for you.” Ron grins at him. He loops his arms around Chris and squeezes. “Thanks mysz I appreciate it.”

They end up all on the couch for the rest of the day. Ron on the floor at one point with Jake for tummy time. Chris and Tom talk once when Ron is out with the dogs. They both think last night was a one off. A combo of things that just caused so much stress he got illogical. They agree to watch out for more.

More never comes. Ron seems to entirely forget that night. Not forget. Move past. He fully embraces being Jake’s dad. Chris and Tom both think Ron as made to have kids. Jesus Christ it should be illegal for him to be so hot with a kid in his arms.

They’re okay. It’ll be fine until it isn’t and then they’ll talk about it. Work through it.

#ron slider kerner #chris seresin #tom iceman kazansky #top gun #ron slider kerner x chris seresin #ron x chris x tom #chris seresin x tom iceman kazansky #tom x ron x chris #tom kazansky x ron kerner #angst #top gun 1986 #baby jake seresin #slider is jake’s dad #mac writes top gun

13 notes · View notes

soulcluster-moved · 2 years

Text

@armatization / cynthia

Gerome,

I'm writing you a letter, because I think it's the only way you'll ever listen to me. At least if it's written down, you can read it over and over again, until you get it in your stubborn head.

I'm never, ever gonna give up on you. I hope you know that. And if you don't know that, reread this until you know that. And one more time for good measure? Got it? Good!

Do you remember when we were little? We were so close. We used to walk around holding hands all the time, and I never left your side. But then you let go of my hand one day and you never held it again. I miss that. I miss you. I know we're not little kids anymore, but I wish you'd hold my hand again. I want you to be there, and I wanna be there when things get tough for you.

I know things are tough for you right now. It's hard for all of us. We're all dealing with it differently, and I know that. But I wish we could deal with it differently together. You know what I mean? You shouldn't push me away because you're scared of losing me. I'm scared of losing you too. I'm scared I've already lost you.

I know we can't go back. We can't be who we were as people, because we're all grown up now. But going forward, I want us to be close again. I miss you so, so, SO much. Please don't avoid me. I just want to help you. I want to be there for you from now on.

If you really, really hate me, that's okay. If you don't say anything about this letter, I'll take it that you really don't like me anymore. That hurts, but sometimes people outgrow each other. Not that I can ever outgrow you. I want to grow WITH you. We were a team once - let's be a team again.

Please talk to me. Even a little. I don't smell that bad. I swear I take a lot of baths, and I'm really clean. Wait that's weird to write. I miss you. I miss us. You don't have to run away anymore. I'm not gonna leave you behind, and I'm not giving up on you, not unless you ignore this letter.

I love you, Gerome. Please come back to me.

♥ Cynthia

Gerome ignored the letter at first, yet like with Cynthia he couldn't keep from staring at it. He'd found it on his pillow just before turning in for the night, but now his plans for sleep were ruined as this letter hung on his thoughts.

Finally, knowing there was only one way forward, he sat on his bed and read it.

As expected of Cynthia, it was long and rambly, and even in the written form he could hear her voice shine in the text. It didn’t take long for the words to start hitting home either. He remembered when they were young and he held her hand, when she taught him to fly and not be afraid of heights. Yet here he was, the same lonely, scared boy he had been all those years ago, clinging so tightly to his fear that he had isolated himself beyond measure.

I’m afraid I’ve already lost you.

That was the point of this entire endeavor. He didn’t want to be thought of as dear or loved, it made it harder to act when it came to the fight against the Grimleal. If an opportunity presented itself, he couldn’t afford to hesitate. His life was forfeit.

So why did it hurt so much when he read it?

From there, he was unable to finish the letter, at least just yet. His sight had begun to blur beneath his mask and he was forced to remove it so he could wipe the tears away. The realization that he was crying at all shook him, and no matter how he tried he was unable to stop the tears. It was like a dam had broken inside him, yet he was unable to piece together what occurred and was left at the whims of the emotions he had repressed for so many years.

Even through his tears, he could hear the shuffle at the entrance of his tent, and knew who it was without looking. Of course Cynthia had been waiting outside, likely eager to see his reaction. Well, she had seen it.

Gerome looked at her only briefly, maskless, tears streaming from his auburn eyes, and then lowered his head and covered his eyes with his hand. Seeing her triggered a fresh wave of tears and his shoulders shook uncontrollably. There was no point in attempting to hide it from her.

#armatization #armatization: cynthia #c: gerome #answered #YOU'VE RUINED ME AND MY MUSE

19 notes · View notes

chrysalis-the-butterfly · 2 years

Text

Taylor Swift Quotes that (I Think) Fit Chip and Dale’s Relationship in the 2022 Film

Becoming Childhood Friends

I’m the only one of me; let me keep you company.

Video games ... you pass me a note ... sleeping in tents ... it’s nice to have a friend.

Moving to Make It in Showbiz

Can I go where you go? Can we always be this close, forever and ever?

Walking through the crowd, the village is aglow. Kaleidoscope of loud heartbeats under coats. Everybody here wanted something more, searching for a sound we hadn’t heard before.

We were a fresh page on the desk, filling in the blanks as we go.

The Fight and the Fallout

And you can’t talk to me when I'm like this: daring you to leave me just so I can try and scare you.

Did you have to ruin what was shiny? Now it’s all rusted!

You asked me for a place to sleep, locked me out, and threw a feast. What?!

You didn’t even hear me out. (You didn't even hear me out.) You never gave a warning sign. (I gave so many signs!) All this time, I never learned to read your mind. (Never learned to read my mind.) I couldn’t turn things around. (You never turned things around.) ’Cause you never gave a warning sign! (I gave so many signs!)

A Long Thirty Years Without Each Other

The drought was the very worst, when the flowers that we’d grown together died of thirst.

I look through the windows of this love, even though we boarded them up. Chandelier’s still flickering here ’cause I can’t pretend it’s okay when it’s not.

I got one thing stuck in my mind - wondering if I dodged a bullet or just lost the love of my life.

Meeting Again, Tensions Rise Again

I knew I’d curse you for the longest time, chasin’ shadows in the grocery line. I knew you’d miss me once the thrill expired, and you’d be standin’ in my front porch light, and I knew you’d come back to me.

Broke your heart? I’ll put it back together. I would wait forever and ever.

Hey, now you say you want it back, now that it’s just too late? Well, it could have been easy: all you had to do was stay.

A long drive could end in burning flames or paradise.

And I know I make the same mistakes every time, bridges burn, I never learn - at least I did one thing right.

Just grab my hand and don’t ever drop it, my love! They are the hunters, we are the foxes - and we run!

All of my heroes died all alone; help me hold on to you.

Reboot and Rebirth

Remember when you hit the brakes too soon? Twenty stitches in a hospital room? When you started crying, baby, I did too, but when the Sun came up, I was looking at you.

I wish we could go back, and remember what we were fighting for. And I wish you knew that I miss you too much to be mad anymore.

I don't wanna do, I don’t wanna do this to you. I don’t wanna lose, I don't wanna lose this with you. I need to say, “Hey, it’s all me. Just don’t go. Meet me in the afterglow.”

This love is good. This love is bad. This love is alive, back from the dead. These hands had to let it go free, and this love came back to me.

#chip n dale rescue rangers #chip n dale movie #chip n dale 2022 #chip n dale #chip and dale #chip x dale #chale #chip maplewood #dale oakmont #taylor swift #song lyrics #blorbo from my shows

8 notes · View notes

fictionalreads · 2 years

Text

Stranger Things Season 4 Episode 9

Russia Crew

Fucking Yuri.

JOYCE AND HOPPER ARE TOO CUTE

Oh Jim. I don’t like that you’ve been beaten like that. I don’t like you hurt.

Hopper has been eating shit. Of course he’s been thinking about the food.

ARE THEY GONNA KISS? THEY KISSED YAY

Oh fuck. The phone.

Oh Hopper. He just wanted to get home and see his kid and now she’s in danger.

They’re staying?! THEYRE GOING BACK TO THE PRISON?! No I wanted a meet up!

I’m with Murray. I have a bad feeling about this.

It got out. How did it get out?

Murray is hilarious.

No Hopper I’m tired of you being in danger.

YES MURRAY YES KEEP GOING WITH THE FIRE

This shit really don’t die.

Drag the sword through the fire Hop!

Hopper you seem to be enjoying that fight.

Hawkins Crew

Guys this is a bad plan. I don’t like this.

This dude is gonna mess it all up isn’t he? Mind your business.

Awe Max and Lucas🥰

I don’t like this. Something is wrong. Abort. ABORT

Oh Max. 🥺

Cause it’s not Lucas. That’s why.

RUN ERICA RUN

He’s telling you the truth Jason. I can see how this looks with Max in the trance but he’s serious!

KICK HIS ASS ERICA

Okay come on Lucas. You gotta do better than that.

EL TO THE RESCUE

NOOO MAAAAXXXXX

Max wake up. Get out of there!

So…Are her bones still broken?

OH FUCK SHES DYING NOOOO FUCK

What is happening? Don’t give your life in the process though El.

Upside Down Crew

Steve being worried has me worried.

Eddie is such a cinnamon roll!

Nice moment. But let’s focus on killing this thing first, yeah?

Awe I think Eddie really liked Chrissy. In an alternate universe, they could’ve been cute together.

Stop being excited. Get out of the upside down.

Oh no. Dustin’s in danger. I don’t like this.

How could y’all forget the vents?

Can y’all get out of here and think of something better?

CLIMB EDDIE CLIMB

Why are you stopping? NO EDDIE YOU DONT GET TO SACRIFICE YOURSELF DO NOT DEVIATE FROM THE PLAN

Eddie. No. It’s okay to run away. You said it yourself. GET TO SAFETY EDDIE

Dustin why the fuck did you go back in?!

No no no. It was a miracle so you need to leave.

Um. Why are y’all waiting? LIGHT HIS ASS UP!!! Throw the shit Steve!

STOP LOOKING AT HIM AND KILL HIS ASS

Nancy is brave.

Damnit he’s gone. I knew it was too good to be true.

NOOOOO EDDIE Why am I sobbing at Eddie’s death speech?

😭😭😭😭 He just wanted to graduate!!

California Crew

Oh they’re getting gas.

Argyle what place. I swear if you’re just talking high imma be mad.

The pizza place?

Purple Palm Tree Deluxe coming in clutch.

LMAO he’s making pizza.

Awe Mike and El moment. Of course Argyle ruins it.

Oh poor Will.

Jonathan trying to let Will know it’s okay and he still loves him.😭💙

Low key wish we got him saying the words to Jonathan. Cause right now it just feels like this thing they know but don’t talk about. And it’s okay to talk about Will being gay.

Get to her El.

Eleven get there already!

Yeah Fight El! But fight faster.

After

Oh now people wanna leave Hawkins.

OH MY GOD THEYRE STILL ON THIS CULT BULLSHIT Okay the doorway part is true.

I’d have told him he wasn’t allowed to leave ever again too Mrs. Eheeler.

Oh she’s in the hospital now. OH ERICAS THERE TOO

Still a disaster Robin. Steve is still a great friend.

Oh Eddie’s uncle! I’m gonna cry again.

Oh Dustin!! Stop I’m already crying!

Where the hell is the Russia crew?

OH THIS HOPPER AND ELEVEN REUNION IS EVERYTHING

Oh God can they leave Will alone.

Are they in the upside down now?

And now I have to wait for more. I just hope it’s not three years again.

Miscellaneous

I don’t even like the title of this episode.

Jason. You’re irrelevant. Go elsewhere. Please.

I don’t like this tension I have.

El can’t die, right? They still have another season.

So how did Vecna lose his nose? Cause he still had it after he went to the upside down.

Oh I don’t like this bad news montage.

Well they can’t ALL die. Right? There’s too much time left in the episode. I feel confident they’ll get away somehow.

Okay they killed it. But there’s still too much time left in the episode.

Oh Jason’s gone.

I DONT LIKE THIS

13 notes · View notes

txxfiles · 2 months

Text

youtube!

why is she going on about youtube i hear u cry? well it’s on my mind and idk what else to talk about so here i am to tell you all about how i’ve recently rediscovered my love for the fucking eboys and ponder upon why i am here once again. but anyway what does it mean? who am i? what is going on? if i knew we wouldn't be here so let's take a trip, shall we?

for anyone who doesn't know the eboys are 4 youtubers who made a short live youtube channel and podcast back during lockdown. it was a culmination of 4 guys i really loved so obviously, i was in. i loved their content separately so having them all together was a dream. their content was the sort of dumb shit i always enjoy so what a fucking win. and then, like all good things, it died within just over a year and i was obviously heartbroken but understood why they decided to call it quits. i don't think i realised how much i missed it until i started watching it again so now there's a small hole in my chest wondering what could have been. i know they won't come back together again like they haven't even made a video all together since so that dream is dead which is sad but whatever.

i’ve come to realise i have very ‘immature’ taste when it comes to youtube, i don’t watch cool video essays very often or like educational or life vlogs or anythng like that, i like commentary videos and ‘i ran a marathon in heelys’ videos (love u will if ur reading this i’m free literally all the time) and i’m not saying this is a bad thing before anyone starts, it brings me joy so it’s fine but having fallen off youtube and come back to it, it’s really made me think.

i was out ALL DAY in central london by myself the other day and had been catching up on george’s (memeulous) videos bc there was nothing else in my sub feed that morning and to be honest, i had missed him. call me lame all u want but that lil man has charmed me for several years at this point and he is exactly my type in terms of personality. he even reminds me of that last person i had a crush on which is hilarious, both in terms of personality and stature (HA.) but anyway, i was out alone and the music wasn’t hitting so i turned to podcasts. the sunny podcast has been on hiatus forever and i’ve listened to that enough and the majority of the other podcasts i listen to are fiction ones which i wasn’t in the mood for. so, i went back to the boys and just had so much fun. they’re so silly but i love it, it’s like sitting in a room with your mates and listening to them chat shit. so now i’m sat here writing this with them on in the background slightly upset the channel died (looking at u will) but i digress.

i was in a major youtube slump last year, apart from my bestie tomska who i have religiously watched for over 10 years now (yikes) i really haven’t kept up with anyone. and then dan and phil games came back and i had a bit more reasons to keep up with it. but I’d fallen out with the eboys for reasons beyond my comprehension. i think something in me was like ‘you’re too old for this’ or something but that’s just so not true. i think part of it was trying to move on from a certain part of my life. i found george and alex specifically through the literal worst person ever so i wonder if leaving them behind was a subconscious effort on my part to put the whole thing behind me which is a lot of what i focused on in therapy. but why let someone else ruin something you love? if i wanna be a teenage boy watching commentary youtubers whilst i play fortnite i will, fuck you.

i never understand why my hyperfixations die, like i can’t put my finger on it but I’ve had several youtube ones. way way back i was a big dan, phil, chris, and pj girlie but also a big fan of tomska and his crowd at the time. never really been into any of the american youtubers tbh but i was SO into all of that specific british crowd for the majority of my time in high school/college. mostly because i was incredibly lonely and watching their videos made me feel like i had friends. but as with everything i fell off it and into k-pop and kinda moved on from keeping up with any of them religiously. and then i got back into it with george and alex and then kinda went out from there and really reconnected with youtube. especially during lockdown when the eboys and their podcast were big, i loved it. i used to watch them when i had to go to work by myself and be socially distanced from everyone for like 8 hours so again, it was like having my friends there. maybe that’s it, maybe its loneliness. maybe i’m lonely at the moment. idk. but anyway, when the channel died, they all drifted and i drifted too. other than keeping up with last month (tomska) i didn’t rlly pay attention to anything unless i wanted to watch a game play through (big up jacksepticeye.) and then we come to now and it’s like going back in time. dan and phil are back and i’m rewatching 4 20 something men talking about butts. it is like a time capsule actually because i’d forgotten about half the stuff they bring up in the podcast episodes so it’s kinda nice being reminded of all the shit that went down.

i think i owe a lot of my want to go into like media to people like tomska, because seeing them make videos and stuff with so little that do so well is so inspiring. and he’s genuinely the longest standing youtuber i’ve kept up with, i’ve never dipped off him. i might now tho bc elliot left and i miss him. idk. it’s weird growing up with people you don’t know but feel like you do. like tom got engaged at christmas and that’s just mental to me.

these people are my friends at this point in my life and yeah i know, parasocial relationships are bad i get it, but i’m not delusional. i’m not stalker level obsessed with any of them and i never have been but i feel a connection to them because i found every single youtuber i love when i was at a horrible awful lonely point in my life so of course it makes sense for me to be connected to them on a slightly deeper level than maybe your average bitch is. but thats not a bad thing i don’t think, like these people arent giving you their ACTUAL lives or personalities, it’s just a small part of them like george doesn't even show his face for fucks sake but that mans my buddy. he doesn't even know me but he’s been there for me when no one else was so of course we’re connected on some level, even if it’s one sided.

i don’t really know if this has a point, i just wanted to talk about it i guess? i think there’s a part of me that’s ashamed of going back to something like this? like it’s not exactly high media is it. how can i at my ripe old age look someone in the eye and say ‘yeah i’ve been watching a man who wears a bandana chat shit about peoples tattoos for the last 18 minutes, how’re you?’ who in my real life is interested in that? lmao. i said at new years i was going to have less shame about the things i enjoy but this feels like step toooooo far. i guess it is loneliness in a sense, everyone feels like they’re moving on and i’m stuck in a rut of trying desperately to move on too or wondering if i should just die instead. returning to something like this brings me comfort. makes me feel safe. life is so weird man. i’m nearly 27 surely things should be getting better?

god help whatever i end up writing when it’s my fucking birthday.

i realise this isn't the most comprehensive thing i’ve ever written but that's not the point so hope u enjoyed the inner workings of my mind!

peace out homies

eucalyptus xoxo

0 notes

earthtoharlow · 1 year

Text

AN: while I enjoy making Jack a dickhead, here's Jack being a lover boy 🤭

obviously this is befere he started acting like Tristan Thompson

SERIES MASTERLIST

YOURINSTA

liked by jackharlow, urbanwyatt, champagnepapi, thatgirlstacey, summerwalker, SZA, chloebailey, and 756,045 others

yourinsta: when you ask your man to take BTS content of you…@jackharlow

view all 5,678 comments

user: everyone say thank you Jack Harlow

jackharlow: is this not bts content???

yourinsta: 🙄

user: well

user: god damn

user: I want you bad

dojacat: I’m asking for your hand in marriage

urbanwyatt: this is why you should’ve asked me to come!! 😠

yourinsta: you were busy 😔

user: are we supposed to be mad?

user: I’m looking disrespectful

druski: Jack don’t know what to do with all that!

JACKHARLOW

liked by yourinsta, saweetie, lilnasx, thatgirlstacey, urbanwyatt, cozane, neelamthadhani and 897,456 others

jackharlow: fuck first class, we fly private ✈️

view all 9,457 comments

thatgirlstacey: GOALS

user: I want what y’all have

user: how is she so flexible

yourinsta: Mile high 🤭

urbanwyatt: can y’all not do this while I’m with y’all

jackharlow: to be fair we thought you were sleep

user: they’re really the best celebrity couple fr

user: poor urban 🤣

Saweetie : only the best for my sis 🥹

user: I need you to ruin my life

druski: Jack are you sharing?

lilnasx: I’ll answer for him, NO!

druski: man mind your business

YOURINSTA

liked by jackharlow, tmz, djdrama, joejonss, SZA, dojacat, cozane, urbanwyatt and 996,466 others

yourinsta: appreciation post for my favorite white boy. We just got off the phone, and all I could think about was how much I love you. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted and more! Our love is capable of moving mountains. Come home, I miss you! (Fuck them kids) @jackharlow

view all 9,467 comments

user: I’m not crying you are

urbanwyatt: ok damn you even got me tearing up 🥲

user: no longer praying on y’all downfall, I love y’all 🥹

user: damn scoot over I wanna join y’all relationship

cozane: fuck get a room!!

neelamthadhani: I’m bringing him home to you I promise 🥲

user: mom and dad!!

user: best celebrity couple

user: idk who I’m more jealous of

jackharlow: babygirl, there’s nowhere I’d rather be right now than cuddle up next to you while you put your cold ass feet on me! The love you’ve given me has made me the best version of myself. You are a dream come true. Be home soon, two more sleeps.

Jack Harlow added to their story!

YOURINSTA

liked by jackharlow, urbanwyatt, saweetie, cardib, Mariahthescientist, djdrama, yungbbq, normani, and 995,381 others

yourinsta: daddy’s home and this pussy just put him to sleep 🤭

view all 24,086 comments

yourinsta: no one better call his phone for the next couple days, no he can’t hang out 🙄

urbanwyatt: you can not hold him hostage

yourinsta: watch me!

user: let me try!!

user: this is crazy

user: best pussy management in the biz

user: ok but you’re so gorgeous!

saweetie: I know that’s right girl!

latto777: my girl !!

druski: oh so that’s why he ain’t answer the phone

user: girl make that man put on a bonnet!

Tag List:

(message me if you'd like to be added)

@heavyhitterheaux @hoodharlow @neon-lights-and-glitter @babiefries @toocriticalharlow @macey234 @jackmans-poison @dstark-0706 @harlowsbby @itsyagirljaz @leftapricotprofessorlover @laylasbunbunny @ilyangelsxo

NEXT PART

#jack harlow #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow x y/n #jack harlow reader #social media au #jack harlow instagram au #jack harlow social media au #toxic

361 notes · View notes

television-pil0t · 1 year

Text

I don’t wanna be touched I wanna be loved. I wanna feel loved. I wanna stop crying. I don’t wanna be needy I wanna be needed. I don’t wanna hurt this much but I don’t wanna die. I wanna handle it myself but I’m at my breaking point. LMAO IVE BEEN HERE FOR A DAMN WHILE! SINCE JULY APPARENTLY! I wear the same clothes to school everyday. I don’t wanna try. My head hurts and it’s spinning. I’m tired of bleeding. I’m tired of punching and burning myself. I’m tired of finding every way out of this. I hate being worried he’s cheating on me. I hate how nonchalant he can be. I hate that i have any problem with him whatsoever GOD IM SUCH A ASSHOLE! WHY AM I LIKE THAT! WHAT THE FUCK DO I WANT FROM HIM! IM THE ONE THAT LET HIM BACK IN MY LIFE AND NOW IM COMPLAINING IT BITCH ITS YOUR FAULT ITS ALL YORU FAULT! Why do I complain so much. Am I asking to much to be loved a little bit more? Yes. Because he’s giving me all he can. We talked about it before. God he’s fucking trying. I’m gonna throw up I hate myself. I’m never gonna be good at art. Programming is a joke. I’m shit at technology. MF probably dosnt EVEN really want me around anymore. He used to talk about how much he wanted me. He said he needed me once. My dad used to hug me. I used to have worth. I used to be worth something. Why did this happen. I used to have so much to me. I used to be so nice. Why did he touch me. WHY DID HE TOUCH ME! WHY DID MIDDLE SCHOOL HAPPEN! GOD I WISH I WAS JUST MOLESTED ON THE INTERNET WHY DID IT HAPPEN IN REAL LIKE! WHY DID HE RUIN MY LIFE! I used to be so fucking nice! I used never be obsessed with someone! I was fucking normal! Why did he have to hit me. Over and over and over! I used to be so fucking nice I CANT GET OVER THAT I USED TO BE NICE! Now I’m such a asshole! Manipulative ass FUCKING BITCH! Using there mental illness as a landing pad when I do something wrong and have the gall to act like I’m better than everyone. MF you wanna go protest. Protest against yourself you fuck up. All this because a guy in 8th grade? All this because some guy when you were 5? Get the fuck over it! SHIT AS IF I CAN BLAME THEM! I’m just a fucking asshole! My bf probably still sends nudes to the gc. He still probably talks shit. He probably likes his friends. LMAO HE PROBABLY FUCKING FLIRTYS WITH THEM ALL THE FUCKING TIME AND I JUST DONT FUCKING KNOW BECAUSE “you get jealous so easily” MF I JUST WANNA DIE GOD DAMN IT IM CRYING AGAIN! I JUST WANNA FEEL SAFE! I WANT SECURITY! I WANT A FUCKING APOLOGY! I WANNA BE TREATED BETTER! EVEN MY PARENTS FUCKING HATE ME! HIS PARENTS WILL TO WHY WOULD I EVEN GO OVER THERE IM A AWFUL FUCKING PERSON WHY AM I ALIVE I SHOULDVE DIED YEARS AGO! I’m a fucking pussy that’s why. I just wanna be ok so fucking back. God it hurts. I cant keep going but I refuse to stop. I don’t wanna die. I just want better. I need better. I can’t be surrounded by fucking hell and be expecting to thrive in it! I’m the the rose in concrete god damn it! I was just a kid. FUCK I ALWAYS SAY THE WRONG THAT! AND THE WORST PART LMAOOO HE DOSNT EVEN TELL ME WHEN I SAW SOMETHING WRONG! HE JUST TALKS SHIT ABOUT ME LMAOO!! “Lol you never learn” YEAH I FUCKING CANT! CALL ME OUT PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME HELP ME HELP ME! I can’t talk to my own bf about my issues not only has he given up by I just feel like he would say “damn boi it’s not that serious” I scream! Maybe if I scream until I bleed I’ll finally be heard. By everyone. I’m tired of this. I’m not ready to be a adult. I’m not ready for any of this shit. God my heart hurts so bad. I feel like I’m just in year one. So much anxiety. Nothing to ease the pain and who’s fault is that. Mine. As always. Who am I crying to? Who am I asking for help? Nobody. Because it never goes well. I just wanna be told I’m loved. Im needed. Tell me it’s gonna be fucking alright because this world sucks. Im not gonna be able to leave out of my apartment until 26 at this rate because of government and inflation and my bf is just saying “save money” UGH LOOK AROUND!! WERE ALL TRYING! It’s so hard to make ends meet! It’s so hard!!

0 notes

julywildsummer · 2 years

Text

When you freezed like you said , why didn’t you stop everything?

Why did you kept going in a direction that didn’t even have a little light at the end of the tunnel?

The only thing I can understand is that you don’t love me enough

You don’t love me enough to leave

You don’t love me enough to think rationally like u say

The only one putting us in such a bad and hard position is YOU

The only one hurting you

Is yourself

I do not

If you can’t leave anything behind your past now

I don’t even know if you will ever have the courage to take it one day

Like you say you’re not 18 anymore

You’re 23 years , you’re a way older

You should know how to figure out life a little bit better normally

But you keep getting stuck this vicious cycle again and again

Even when you move to another city

You end up

Having the same life

Again?

Aren’t you tired ?

Of not being your own boss?

Of living like you’re an assistant or a mother every fucking day?

And not being a human being

You hurt yourself by staying with someone you pretend you do not love anymore

And you hurt yourself by not staying with someone you pretend you love

So what do you want me to understand? When there’s actually nothing to understand?

I hear you complain on the daily when really you don’t even have the right to cause you’re choosing this

The only purpose you had to move , is burned 2

So now what do we do ?

What do you want me to do

Cause I’m not even waiting a second more

If you don’t wanna lose me ever you better start thinking a little bit farther

Cause I don’t think you understand what I lose 2 if I’ll have to tell everyone around me that I love a woman

You’re scared she’s going to do things to ruin your reputation or I don’t know when you can clearly not just ruin her reputation but her life ?

So are you really just scared of just pretending

You’re parents already had the doubts

You’re mother knows

You clearly didn’t care for her

You bring her home

You do everything

But when you finally had the right to move on

You didn’t do it

And you still kept me with you , with hopes

While I start to really see that there will never be a us again

Cause when I’ll be older I may understand a little bit better

But mostly I’ll understand that if it had to break me without winning anything it didn’t serve for anything at all

Even if those words or hard to take or swallow

Yes

It didn’t bring me nowhere loving you the way that I loved you

The way I’ve never loved anyone

I gave you

All of my time

All I had

And mostly all of me in every ways possible

And still that wasn’t enough for you to see my worth

Or what I could bring you

I won’t say I didn’t had a good time knowing you

Cause clearly it felt like a movie half of the time

But there was always and expiration

I know love isn’t pink all the time

But it shouldn’t hurt as this either

If you want to think I’m a kid and that I don’t understand nothing

Go ahead, think that way

I’m a way younger than both of you

And I know that I would’ve never have done anything you guys do or did to each other

Or act like you guys do on the daily

Or live like you guys do 2

You can insult me with the fact that I’m younger

But if younger is

Not understand why you don’t leave someone you don’t love for someone you love

Because you’re scared

Then yes I’m younger

And yes

I do not understand

I always told you I was scared of opening to someone

Scared of people leaving

But you can’t blame me for leaving

Even though

Leaving is as hard as keeping you in my life

So what the fuck should I do?

I spend my nights crying

I spend my days overthinking about every stupid little detail

You ask me to not hate you

But how you do you want me not to feel anger

When I have to let someone go that I opened every fucking door with

I have to let someone go that I love more than myself and anything

I have to let my best friend go

I have to let the person go to whom I showed my body to

I have to let someone go with whom I was not afraid of being vulnerable

I have to let you go when in the first place I would’ve have left anything or anybody for you

I have to let you go and break me because you’re “scared” of what could happen

And the worst part of all is I just simple can’t accept the fact that she has you and I don’t

The feeling of knowing that there’s someone else touching you

That there is someone else kissing you

When I kiss you half of the times I’m just so cold that I have to kiss you after someone else

When you call me with cute names I don’t do it for you most of the times

Cause you call someone’s like that 2

And this person calls you like that 2

The feeling I have every night cause you’re living with someone else is killing me more and more

She can do anything she wants with you and I don’t

Even strangers get to do so much more with u than I can

And then you want me to believe you love me

When even strangers get more access than the person you’re supposed to love

And then you don’t want me to feel anger

while in almost 3 weeks you haven't made the effort to be able to spend a single day with me

There’s one thing I’m sure I will never let anybody do to me again after this is

Being the second option

Being the other woman’s shadow

Cause this feeling

Is a feeling that you will never understand

And that’s a feeling I wish to nobody ever

And that’s how it ends

That’s how I end up alone ???

The way I’m crying writing this with not even being able to breathe shows how much I care for you but you can’t even see it

You may think that I’m becoming someone I’m not and it’s the truth

I’m really turning into someone I don’t know and I hate it

And I hate her

So / to response to your text

Thank you for those little times where you really were the only one loving me

Idk where it will bring us , or if time will heal us

Or if we will stop fighting and just live or lives on both sides

I still think we should talk in real life cause we’re not 2 immature babies

And I don’t need 1 hour talk I want enough time

To say what I want to either for you

I don’t want you standing there and become mute

You will have to say what you think all the time

Have the courage to say what you want to

But yeah I guess there’s where we’ll see how we were supposed to end

0 notes

poppystain · 3 years

Text

𝐇𝐀𝐋𝐒𝐄𝐘'𝐒 — 𝐈𝐅 𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐍'𝐓 𝐇𝐀𝐕𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄, 𝐈 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐏𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐑 ( 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟏 ) / feel free to change pronouns as you see fit !

THE TRADITION

❛ she's easy on the eyes. ❜

❛ her soul is black and it's a fact. ❜

❛ so take what you want, take what you can, take what you please. ❜

❛ ask for forgiveness, never permission. ❜

❛ It's in the blood and this is tradition. ❜

❛ they dress her up in golden crowns, her smile hides a lie. ❜

❛ you can take it back it's good as gone. ❜

❛ this is your soul, i hope what's left will last all summer long. ❜

❛ they said that boys were boys but they were wrong. ❜

BELLS IN SANTE FE

❛ don't call me by my name, all of this is temporary. ❜

❛ watch as i step away, for your sake. ❜

❛ maybe i can hold you in the dark. ❜

❛ leaving through the door without a word. you won't even notice, little bird. ❜

❛ better off dead, so i reckon i'm heading to hell instead. ❜

❛ don't wait for me, it's not a happy ending. ❜

❛ to sort out all his bullshit, to figurе out the treason ❜

❛ jesus, you've got better lips than judas. ❜

❛ i could give you bad one, otherwise i'm useless. ❜

❛ 'cause who the fuck would choose this? ❜

EASIER THAN LYING

❛ i'm only whatever you make me. ❜

❛ you make me more and more a villain every day. ❜

❛ you don’t know you reap, you sow. ❜

❛ whatever you give to me from yourself you take. ❜

❛ well if you're a hater then hate the creator, it's in your image i’m made. ❜

❛ 'cause i'll hang myself if you'd give me rope. ❜

❛ i got so much faith and lost all hope. ❜

❛ one eye broken and one eye bruised, ‘cause I gave myself away for you. ❜

❛ you liar, you don't love me too. ❜

❛ my heart is massive but it's empty. ❜

❛ gasping for some real attention, some undivided hypertension. ❜

❛ losing you is easier than lying to myself. ❜

LILITH

❛ i'm perfection when it comes to first impressions. ❜

❛ you got me thinkin' that i was too mean. ❜

❛ everything that I say I believe. ❜

❛ tuck a knife with my heart up my sleeve. ❜

❛ i am disruptive, i've been corrupted. ❜

❛ by now I don't need a fuckin' introduction. ❜

❛ you know I get too caught up in the moment. ❜

❛ i can't call it love if i show it. ❜

❛ i just fuck things up if you notice. ❜

❛ have you noticed? tell me, have you noticed? ❜

❛ now i'm wondering if i ever wanted to hold you. ❜

❛ you'd let anybody with a body control you, and you know it too. ❜

❛ the more that you have, the more that they'll take. ❜

GIRL IS A GUN

❛ i'm not your daydream, i won't have your baby. ❜

❛ it's a shot in the dark, i'm not a walk in the park. ❜

❛ this girl is a gun, and we been havin' some fun. ❜

❛ i can show you if you turn the lights on. ❜

❛ i keep waitin' for love to come and swallow me up. ❜

❛ I feel better when the boys stop callin'. ❜

❛ this girl is a gun, before you know it, it's done. ❜

❛ god is a gun, he can have what he wants. ❜

❛ let me show you how to touch my trigger. ❜

❛ makin' me crazy from mornin' to evenin'. ❜

❛ i can't not take it, i love it, i break it. ❜

❛ it's never enough, so I'm givin' you up. ❜

YOU ASKED FOR THIS

❛ i don't know what you want from me. ❜

❛ now what the fuck does all this mean? ❜

❛ my tears are falling flawlessly now. ❜

❛ go on and be a big girl, you asked for this now. ❜

❛ who the hell is in your bed? ❜

❛ you gotta kiss goodnight and give some head. ❜

❛ i want my cake on a silver plater, i want a fistful in my hands. ❜

❛ i want a beautiful boy's despondent laughter. ❜

❛ i wanna ruin all my plans. ❜

❛ i want a fist around my throat. ❜

❛ i wanna cry so hard, i choke. ❜

❛ i want everything i ask for. ❜

DARLING

❛ really can't remember where i left my spine. ❜

❛ maybe I'll be better if I take my meds. ❜

❛ darling don't you weep, there's a place for me. ❜

❛ somewhere we can sleep, see you in your dreams. ❜

❛ ever since i was a little girl i found this sweet. ❜

❛ all the little flowers give me something to believe in. ❜

❛ never knew the feeling of a stable home, been a couple years of living on the road. ❜

❛ only you have showed me how to love me in a life. ❜

❛ until it's time to see the light, i'll make my own with you each night. ❜

❛ i'll kidnap all the stars and i will keep them in your eyes. ❜

1121

❛ i won't die for love, but i've got a body here to bury. ❜

❛ the parts of myself that i've hated... i can't tell which ones are mine and which I created. ❜

❛ you could have my heart and i would break it for you. ❜

❛ i try to be careful with the thing inside my chest. ❜

❛ so you can forget me , i'll leave if you let me. ❜

❛ please don't leave, don't leave me in the shape you left me. ❜

❛ just leave me in the place you found me safe and soundly. ❜

HONEY

❛ she's on the tip of my tongue, she's on the top of my thighs. ❜

❛ open your mouth, i got a surprise. ❜

❛ all i can taste is the blood in my mouth and the bitterness in goodbye. ❜

❛ drippin' like honеy, down the back of my throat and on the front of my mind. ❜

❛ she stings like she means it, she's mean and she's mine. ❜

❛ i love every second, it's fuckin' fantastic ❜

❛ she's hell in a basket just makin' a racket. ❜

❛ good things aren't easy to get, i know that i won't regret you. ❜

❛ between my fingers, she leaves then she lingers. ❜

WHISPERS

❛ you sabotage the things you love the most. ❜

❛ this is the voice in your head that says, "you do not want this". ❜

❛ this is the ache that says, "you do not want him". ❜

❛ bet I could fuck him. ❜

❛ why do you need love so badly? ❜

❛ i've got a monster inside me. ❜

❛ isn't it lonely? ❜

❛ think that you know me? you think that you could if you hold me? ❜

❛ think you could try to console me, but i do not know me. ❜

I AM NOT A WOMAN, I’M A GOD

❛ i am not a woman, i'm a god. ❜

❛ i am not a martyr, i'm a problem. ❜

❛ i am not a legend, i'm a fraud. ❜

❛ keep your heart, 'cause i already got one. ❜

❛ every day i've got a smile where my frown goes. ❜

❛ maybe i could be a different human in a new place. ❜

❛ i just wanna feel something, tell me where to go. ❜

❛ i stay right herе 'cause i'm better all alonе. ❜

❛ i never listen but i see you with my eyes closed. ❜

❛ it really does hurt when you love someone. ❜

THE LIGHTHOUSE

❛ from a tender age i was closed with rage. ❜

❛ i went swimming with the devil at the bottom of a lake. ❜

❛ he was tall and mean with venom eyes so green. ❜

❛ i'll allure you like a landslide and I'll show you lovely things. ❜

❛ he kissed me on the mouth and dug his fingers in my thighs. ❜

❛ a sailor ain't a savior 'cause they only tell you lies. ❜

❛ he's laying in the water, begging god to let him down. ❜

❛ i showed him all my teeth and then i laughed out loud. ❜

❛ i never wanted saving, i just wanted to be found. ❜

❛ that should teach a man to mess with me. ❜

❛ i'm glad i met the devil 'cause he showed me i was weak, and a little piece of him is a little piece of me. ❜

YA’ABURNEE

❛ i can't decide if i love you more at morning or i love you more at night. ❜

❛ the moon don't pick sides and the sun won't resign until you're by my side. ❜

❛ your beauty is a blessing. ❜

❛ i never got to tell you how i lovеd the way my eyes makе yours look green. ❜

❛ i think we could live forever in each others faces. ❜

❛ if we don't live forever maybe one day we'll trade places. ❜

❛ darling, you will bury me before i bury you. ❜

❛ i'll never know if there's danger in confession. ❜

❛ it's memory that presses like a blade against my throat. ❜

❛ or to die without revealing that you got inside my head. ❜

❛ love is just a currency so take my pockets, and take me home. ❜

❛ take my life, and take my soul, wrap me in a wedding ring. ❜

#lyric starters #sentence starters #rp starter #inbox memes #rp meme #halsey #if i can't have love i want power

2K notes · View notes

Last Seen Blogs

deniss-chavez

she.s_deniss

sangmileah07

Untitled

labanner

wickedpixey

Wickedpixey's Ramblings

phantocube

in the cube