#i hate buildings i hate backgrounds. but i am actually glad i worked on this i think it helped me get more consistent with line strokes
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uhh assistant naruhodou and the foggy city, ermmm the adventures of the ghost town?? i cant think of a good name
but there are more sketches i made while thinking about this under read more!!
#dgs#tgaa#ryuunosuke naruhodou#iris wilson#iris watson#dai gyatuken saiban#the great ace attorney#i hate buildings i hate backgrounds. but i am actually glad i worked on this i think it helped me get more consistent with line strokes#even if it doesnt seem like it in the picture#i should draw more backgrounds#just to get more used to it#my art
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re: BG3 alignment stuff
Alignments always seemed a bit weird to me because it always felt limiting. I preferred systems with reputation instead where it builds as you go, good or bad. Same with something like faction reputations. It was also a good reminder of who hated me or not when coming back to things after a while. lol
Oh my friend. Congratulations and also I am sorry, because this ask has unlocked not one, but two long infodumps from me! Feel free to just skip by the one on reputation systems and/or alignments, but also thank you so much for giving me an excuse to talk about both of them at once, this is an excellent gift!
=On Reputation Systems=
So I have mixed feelings about most reputation systems in most games these days. Generally speaking, for me, if a reputation starts at 0 and only goes up (or back down to 0), it doesn't do much for me. Especially when it is for an individual or a plot-relevant group/organization, it always feels to me like lazily offloading narrative character development to a player for the sake of "making choices matter" or just to boast they have such a system.
Even a lot of systems that have "negative" reps either don't really seem to have substantive consequences for going negative, or make the consequences things that probably should just be the natural narrative result of following that narrative path. Which isn't to say that happens in every game with a system like that, but I find that the majority really don't need reputation systems any more than they need alignment ones.
There are, however, two games (for which spoilers follow) that I consider the goldest of gold standards for reputation systems and that I wish other games would take cues from and implement: Tyranny and Alpha Protocol. Again, spoilers will be following, mostly minor and early ones for Tyranny, but fairly major ones for Alpha Protocol.
So in Tyranny, they have two different sets of two reputations, depending on whether it is with one of your companions or not. For your companions, their opinion is measured in Loyalty and Fear, while organizations and individuals of power/influence are measured in Favor and Wrath. Importantly though, you can build both "sides" of reputation at the same time, and get different benefits - narrative and mechanical - from each.
For example, on the companion side, your very first companion is Verse. She's a skirmisher who can swap between twin melee weapons and archery pretty freely, and getting Loyalty or Fear to a certain break point will unlock special team attacks with her. If she is sufficiently Loyal and trusts you to do your part, you get an AoE bow attack where she steps into your hands and you launch her into the air to fire a volley down. But if she Fears you enough to take whatever orders you give, you can hurl fire magic at her, which she will catch on her swords for a long-lasting melee damage buff.
Likewise, certain actions can build both sides at the same time. My favourite example of this is with Lantry, the scholarly spy/librarian/healer companion, who pretty much as soon as you get him, will take time to teach you the Life Magic rune (if you want to learn it). And he cautions you to take a while to practice it before trying to do actual spellwork with it, because the slightest mistake could spell disaster. But if you have the right character background (War Mage, in my case) you can confidently and immediately fire off a flawless Life spell as soon as he finishes his instruction, ignoring his warning. And doing so makes him Fear you, as he is pretty sure your hubris will backfire one day, but he also gains Loyalty, as he is glad to be working with such an exceptionally skilled and experienced mage.
--
Alpha Protocol goes a different direction, giving you a -10 through +10 opinion score with pretty much every character (and I think organization, it's been a while) that you meet. Just a single axis, but it is explicit from the start and borne out in gameplay that bad reputation is not necessarily a bad thing for your character. (Seriously, as soon as you meet your boss for the first time, he basically says outright "You are a spy. You have specific goals to accomplish and none of them include being liked by everyone. If pissing someone off is the best way to accomplish your goals, do it.")
On the simple levels of basic perks, they have some neat ideas for passive things you get in either direction. My favourite example is the agency tech expert: if he likes you, he massages requisitions and gives you more room or uses of consumable tech for your missions. If he doesn't, you get all the buggiest shit-tech . . . which still works, but zaps your character often enough to grant electricity resistance.
But then, on the major narrative end, you can also get pretty huge differences in outcomes based on reputation. The Italy area's final boss is a very coldly professional head of a PMC. By default, when you fight him at the end of that region's arc, he fights just long enough to delay you from saving everyone, then has a scripted retreat. But if - and only if - you've managed to get him all the way to -10 opinion by then, the scripted retreat scene starts, he looks at his watch, and he decides fuck it, there's still enough time for him to put an unprofessional shit like you down. And then you can kill him, changing how the final level will play out pretty notably.
Basically, if a game is gonna have any rep or alignment system, I want it to do more than numerically increment progress towards what could just as easily be natural narrative progression down a specific path.
Also, this has gotten fuck-you levels of long already, so I'm gonna just. Publish this half, then will reblog it with the talk on Alignment stuff in a day or two? xD
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Day One Hundred Thirty-Four
This is a thing that happens in teaching: there are students who choose you as their person, the adult they trust, the one whose class is their favorite, etc, etc... Sometimes, it makes total sense. Like, the sprinters on the track team are my people because I'm their coach, the kids who like anime are my people because I'll discuss Bleach and Fullmetal Alchemist with them. But I have no idea why the big, Carhartt-wearing farm boys have decided to be my people. And this year? I've also got the student who hates school, and feels like adults are out to get him, and shuts down when he's under pressure. He thinks I'm awesome.
And I have no idea why.
I even said this in a meeting today. I am all the things he professes to dislike: strict, demanding, unwilling to put up with work avoidance... And yet he responds positively to me, and he does solid work in my class even though it's hard for him. I'm super glad about it, but it truly does mystify me.
Meantime, I've got another student who I used to have a decent rapport with, and it's just fallen apart. It happened gradually- some defiance here, some refusals to engage there- but now everything is a struggle. The one thing I've got going for me is that I think I might've found a book he actually likes reading (Randy Ribay's Patron Saints of Nothing) because that's assignment he has been doing. And, since today's lesson was the same as yesterday's, that worked well. It's a small win, but it's still a win.
Another win: my APGOV lesson today. It was mostly a discussion. We recapped Tom White's visit (and I revealed that he had been one of my teachers, and the reason why I became a social studies teacher). Then I had them read the civil rights planks of the party platforms in 1948, most of which (except southern Democrats' "states rights" platform) called for policy changes to promote equal rights, end discrimination, and criminalize race-based violence. I asked them to identify why public opinion shifted so radically from acceptance of eugenics and mainstreaming of white supremacist ideas in the 1920s and early 1930s to the beginnings of the civil rights movement, and one girl correctly guessed that WWII played a huge part in it since the Nazis took eugenics and ran with it. The concentration camps made it clear- horrifyingly so- how that way of thinking would end. We'll get more into what actually happened during the Civil Rights Movement over the next several classes, and it'll be so much more powerful with that historical background knowledge.
Last win of the day: hiding Easter eggs for the track team, as is tradition. By hiding, I mean that I went out on the snow-covered track and threw them all over the place so our athletes would run through the snow, kick it up, and help it melt faster. It was a fun way to start a cold, windy practice, and put everyone in high spirits in spite of these weather conditions! Did we also build an Easter snowman? Yup. Gotta embrace what we have!
#teaching#edublr#teachblr#education#teacher#high school#social studies#coaching#track#easter egg hunt#day one hundred thirty four
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Reveal your watch & rewatch drama list
Thank you for tagging me @dimpledpran this was so fun! 😊
I am consulting my spreadsheet of film and tv I've seen this year to do this because my memory is awful! (Am I Pran? A spreadsheet? For something fun??? mmmmm yessss)
Just finished:
Kinnporsche: I appreciated so many parts of this show though there were a few bits, especially in the final ep, that could have been different. But overall very enjoyable and I'm so glad I got to know these actors because of it, I am still in awe of Apo's acting!
Old Fashion Cupcake: Sooooooo cute!! I know I'm definitely gonna rewatch this as a comfort show in the future, the acting was amazing, the storyline was just what I needed and everything was so warm. Maybe gonna be in my top 5 bls? 🥰
To My Star 2: I know a lot of people hated the angst but I thrive on angst in my love stories. I do think though, because the first season was quite similar in that it was a lot of build up and very little actual relationship screentime, it could have done with more! I want more of them being domestic, please!
Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo: A small shout out because I finished it a while ago but it was SO SWEET. 10/10 in "this is adorable and I love them as individuals and as a couple".
Currently Watching:
Run On: I started watching a long time ago, saw half of it and then stopped and I don't remember why? So I just picked up where I left off and I'm loving it again! Everyone has such dry humour and it's exactly my style. All the women in this show are top tier, like Mijoo knowing what she wants and asking for it, I love a woman in charge. (Also Seongyeom's mother just shutting his dad down when he tries to force her to do things and telling him she's living her own life, yessssss. AND having a cannon asexual character?)
Extraordinary Attorney Woo: I've only seen 3 eps so far but it's so cute!! I love the trope of the male love interest just being so immediately like a puppy in love.
Bad And Crazy: I haven't watched in a couple of weeks and I'm terrible at watching multiple shows at once, but I've seen maybe half of it and I'm really enjoying it!
Starting Soon:
Vice Versa, Don't Say No, The Devil Judge, Manner Of Death, Lovely Writer, Link: Eat Love Kill. Those are the top of the list but also likely to change and I don't know how long it will take me to get round to them!
Rewatching:
I don't really rewatch things often, or at least not fully. I usually rewatch certain episodes or parts that I really enjoyed but rarely do I rewatch a whole show in order. I just don't really have the attention span. Sometimes I'll put things on in the background when I'm doing something else but whatever it is I'm working on rarely lasts a whole show anyway!
Tagging: @icouldhyperfixatehim @surajmukhis @wkxs @snimeat @lovingpran no pressure if you've already done it or don't want to bother :)
#tag game#to watch#this was fun and im usually soo bad at them!#top 6 bls for anyone curious (i really couldnt choose just 5)#the untamed. we best love. bad buddy. kieta hatsukoi. old fashion cupcake. semantic error.#in no particular order#these are my babies and i love them forever#if im rewatching anything its probably one of them#🥰🥰🥰#thank youuuu
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Hold Me Close | JJK
Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader, ex Namjoon x Reader (ft. brother Jimin)
Genre/Tags: brother’s best friends au; (dash of) angst, fluff (sort of), smut
Warnings: foul language, feelings of insecurity, minor accident caused by inebriation, getting drunk, sexual content (oral, unprotected sex but be safe please!), JK has a hip tattoo and at some point has grey hair (18+)
Word count: 22k
Summary: When Jimin hits a crisis, he enlists the help of his older sister - you - and his best friend, Jungkook, to put the pieces back again. That proves to be difficult when 1) Jimin’s a brat and a certified pain in the ass, and 2) Jungkook has grown and suddenly, you can’t keep your eyes off him.
A/N: I wanted to write something fun for a change and saw @ladyartemesia‘s brother’s best friend list and thought it would be a nice trope to explore because if there would be an ideal bratty younger brother, it would be Jimin. This was sooo much fun to write but also reminded me again of why I love my baby sister more than anyone in this world. Hope you all enjoy!
##
Three - the number of missed calls you probably now have just in the last 5 minutes, the vibrations piercing through your pocket and onto your thigh. It might be important, but so is keeping your attention on the department Director to your right, who is complimenting the man to your left, over a proposal that you spent weeks working on.
You force a smile because in front of your entire department isn’t really the time and place to refute and complain. It doesn’t help that Chul accepts the credit because anything to get ahead, right?
Just another reason why you dislike this job. Perhaps your boss telling you that you’re too emotional or too soft to be in this industry has gotten to you, but then again, there’s not a bone in you that’s ambitious and competition-craved, unlike your parents. But you try, at least. It’s the least you can do for something that’s expected of their eldest child.
The Director flips a page and turns to you. “Glad you could contribute to this, Ms. Park.”
He did assign it to you but you suppose your name just flew off his head, but you remind him anyway.
“Thank you for the opportunity to work on it, Mr. Yoon. I’m truly learning a lot,” you fake a smile and wish for this to end.
Soon enough it does and you bow towards the managers present, one of them giving you the compliment you needed to hear, and excuse yourself before another call comes in.
Best brother ever, the screen announces, and you curse yourself for still not changing his contact name and for having an easy-enough password to guess.
“I swear to god, Jimin, this better be an emergency,” you cuss to the person on the other end, already boiling at the thought of him possibly calling to ask how to fix a broken toilet or what kind of oil he’s supposed to buy for frying because he’d done both too many times for you to count.
“___!” The sound of a relieved huff is what greets you, the voice familiar.
“Jungkook?”
“Yeah, hi,” he says. “Uh, we’re at the hospital.”
Your eyes widen and you scold yourself for missing the calls, but then again, you wouldn’t have known because Jimin’s wolf cries precede this moment of an actual emergency.
“What? Why! Is my brother okay?” You cry out, hands already working on collecting your files and feet rushing towards your desk to pack up.
“Yeah,” Jungkook affirms. “He’s fine. He just—“
“I AM NOT FINE!” You hear your brother shriek in the background, sound a little soft due to distance but you don’t miss the farcical tone of his statement.
“Dude, it’s just a sprained ankle. You’ll live,” Jungkook tells him calmly, away from the phone.
You sigh in relief because Jungkook is definitely the person to believe in times like this.
“From 1 to Jimin, how dramatic is he?” You ask.
“Jimin. Times two.”
“Damn, okay. That actually seems worse than the injury itself huh?”
Jungkook laughs in agreement.
“I’m just packing. I’ll go to you guys right after.”
“Alright. General Hospital, emergency room. Just follow the tone of the weeping man-child.”
“I feel so empty. What am I gonna do with my life now!” You hear in the background.
You laugh at your brother’s antics because you’ve heard that exact line not long ago after his building owner told him again that he can’t have a pet in the apartment. But who knows with Jimin this time around?
“Got it. See you in a bit,” you say, then head out to hail a cab.
**
You arrive in the emergency room and follow the sound of the weeping man-child and true enough, you see your baby brother lying on the bed with his right leg nestled on pillows, ice taped on the swollen ankle.
You rush to his side and assess if there’s any other part that’s being treated. “What the hell happened to you?” You worriedly ask. “Is this because of work? God, Jimin. I told you that company overworks you! You don’t even get enough rest.”
Behind you, you could hear muffled laughter, and paired with your brother’s sheepish smile, you could already tell he got it over something silly. He’s avoiding your gaze, causing your worry to turn to frustration.
You cross your arms and you give him a stern look. “Park Jimin, look at me and tell me what happened.”
He plays with the hem of the blanket draped over him and with a sickly sweet smile, the one he uses on you to get himself out of trouble, he says, “I may have drank and perhaps had my foot stuck in a gutter and I may also have moved about when Jungkook told me to stay still and well…” Arms laid out before him as if in presentation, “here I am!”
He’s beaming, as if it’s something to be proud of. You know it’s his tactic but still, your brother’s ability to go from one reaction to another astounds you.
You turn to Jungkook for confirmation and he nods at the accuracy and absurdity of the situation, causing a worried feeling in the pit of your stomach because how the hell are you going to explain this to your parents?
“You forgot the part about you screaming that you hate men and you don’t want to love anymore,” Jungkook adds. It’s classic Jimin that it actually makes you laugh.
You, as his older sister and Jungkook, as his best friend of 15 years, should be used to this already but your brother is plucked from a classic romcom as the hot mess character and that carries with it amusement and predictability.
You're about to ask for an elaboration to put more context in the scene that’s playing in your head of a crying Jimin flailing his arms and a bemused but laughing Jungkook trying to shut him up, when the doctor comes in.
She checks the clipboard then on Jimin.
“Thankfully, there’s nothing broken,” she says, jotting down on a pad. She starts instructing how to properly wrap the ankle, prompting Jungkook to stand next to you and Jimin to nip at his fingernails because the brat won’t even pay attention to how to care for his own injured foot.
After handing you the prescription, the doctor tells Jimin, “We’ll just wrap you up with a cast and give you the crutches then you can head home.”
“So I’m not staying?” He asks.
“No need,” the doctor clarifies. “It’s just sprained but it will take several weeks to properly heal and it will be sore for a while,” she states, then calls a nurse and instructs him to prepare the supplies.
“You said you’re a dance instructor? The injury was aggravated by previous mild sprains so I require complete rest. You absolutely cannot move. Just stay in bed and follow the instructions I’ve written down.”
You and Jungkook release a sigh of relief, thankful that it’s nothing serious, the concern over what prompted his outburst temporarily at the back of your mind, until Jimin speaks up.
“But, something else feels broken.”
“What is it?” The doctor asks, suddenly worried and checks the board for anything she might’ve missed.
“My heart.”
“Yah!” You smack Jimin’s arm in embarrassment, which he returns with a smack on yours, a common sight for you both and Jungkook who’s bared witness to the violence you and your brother inflicted upon each other growing up.
The doctor rolls her eyes. “She’ll come back,” she says, then heads towards the door.
Jimin scrunches his nose in annoyance. “She’s a he, by the way!” He shouts, causing the others present to turn to him, as if such a situation is scandalous.
“Do… you have a boyfriend I don’t know about?” You nervously ask.
While your 3-year gap sibling relationship is rooted in violence that’s caused bruises, buckets of tears, timeouts, and your parents almost giving up on making you two get along at many points of your lives, you and Jimin have somehow grown up and have found the right balance of telling each other important things while also staying out of each other’s business.
The “growing up” only happened midway through his college life, when he realized that even with his best friend next to him, you were still his lifeline in the big city of Seoul and the only other reminder of home.
Because even with him knowing what it takes to make it in the competitive entertainment industry as a choreographer, in his heart, he’s still the younger child who’s used to being taken care of. That meant regularly demanding your presence in his dorm when he was still studying and then crashing your place when he’d started working. For food, mostly. The ranting about things just came naturally after.
“It’s Tae,” he shyly reveals, meeting your eyes for the first time and suddenly, he’s your little brother again, the one whose snacks you used to prepare or whose wounds you used to treat when your parents weren’t home or were too tired from work.
“Your roommate?”
“Yeah. He left today because he got this photography gig where he gets to travel the world.”
“I didn’t know you had a thing,” you say.
“We didn’t,” he huffs out in frustration. “I didn’t know I liked him until he said he booked a one-way ticket and didn’t know when he'd be coming back. And he was so excited and I was really happy for him but also felt like it was too late. Like should I have said anything? What if he felt the same way? Would he have stayed?” He sighs, looking sullen this time.
“He may have, or he would still be taking the trip. Regardless, no one should be giving up on dreams for anybody, Chim. That’s not how it’s supposed to work,” you say, not meaning to sound as if you’re reprimanding him, but the look he gives is enough to tell you that he understands. He’s heard variations of that same sentiment before, anyway.
Jungkook feels the tension in the air and breaks it by stating that he’ll be driving everybody home.
“I’ll be staying with my sister,” Jimin announces, his annoying smile now back, and he knows you can’t say no; by obligation or by choice, you won’t tell.
“There goes my weekend,” you gripe.
“I won’t be a nuisance, I promise,” he says then crosses his heart, like it actually means anything.
“You’re a nuisance even when you’re not injured, what more now?”
“I’m not that bad,” he defends.
“Oh, but you are.” You turn to Jungkook. “You know, I actually tried to push him back in our mom’s vagina but even her uterus didn’t want him anymore.”
“Ouch okay, I will pretend I didn’t hear that,” and you all laugh as Jimin is transferred to the wheel chair and pushed by the nurse, signaling Jungkook to go ahead and retrieve his car.
**
You arrive at your apartment with a Jimin-clad Jungkook in tow, the worry of not having cleaned up quickly dissipating because this is your brother, and he shouldn’t complain.
Jungkook assists Jimin in the bathroom while you set up your bed by piling up pillows for his foot.
“I don’t have clean sheets for the sofa bed in the other room,” you say, “and it’s not cleaned up, as I didn’t expect to house an injured child this weekend. Just sleep on my bed first.”
Jungkook guides Jimin to your bed and helps him settle in, with your brother looking all smug with the treatment he’s getting because he knows you don’t give up your bed that easily.
“What about you?” Jungkook asks, seemingly more worried about your inconvenience than the actual cause of it.
“I’m fine with the couch. Wouldn’t wanna sleep here with him and accidentally hit his foot. He might murder me or something.”
“Thanks, Sis. I’m very comfortable here. I think I’ll be sleeping well tonight,” Jimin states, then yawns, drowsiness kicking in from the medication.
You roll your eyes and close the door. You lead Jungkook to your kitchen and offer him a drink.
“I’m sorry for him, Kook. Did he drag you out of work?” You ask.
“Just had to call the tattoo parlor and reschedule my Friday appointments,” he says, downing the glass of water. “He was pretty emotional over the phone and wanted to drink at 4PM and well, you know the rest.”
“Ugh, such a pain in the ass,” you mutter, massaging your temples. “But was he serious about the whole Tae thing?”
“Seemed like it. I think it just took an abrupt change for him to realize what he felt,” he explains. “But you know him - falls fast, moves on faster. He’ll be okay. You’re here,” he continues, flashing you his bunny smile, the one that used to cause you to pinch his puffy cheeks out of cuteness.
But that’s when he was a lanky 10-year old with his awkward front bangs. The man in front of you now sports long dark locks and a sharp jawline, tattooed arms and probably a built figure, if the way he carried your brother as if he’s a feather is any indication of his strength. His bambi eyes, usually scrunched large nose, and child-like smile are the only things that remain from that memory of him.
“You know I can’t stand my brother for long periods of time, Kook,” you pout, earning you an amused laugh.
“He actually already invited me over the weekend, asked me to bring my PS4 so we could play.”
“That bitch has to rest, what is he talking about?”
“Same thing I told him. I’ll just make up some reason that my player caught fire or that I dropped it while running or something.”
You give him a straight face. “The hell would he buy that? You can just not bring it.”
“I’m just gonna match his drama,” Jungkook shrugs, earning him your laugh, which for him is all tones of sweet and soothing.
A smile forms on his face at the thought of making you laugh like this, something he secretly enjoys. This particular sound would most likely be etched in his mind, among the several others that he caused.
There was that time when you caught him doing chubby bunny as a consequence and seeing him stuffed with marshmallows made you secretly giggle because 15-year old you didn’t want to indulge in their silly antics; Jungkook heard it though.
There was that other time during Jimin’s 14th birthday at an arcade, Jungkook went over the basketball game’s railing to get the highest score and you alternated between scolding him and laughing your butt off. He snuck the tickets he won in your pile though so you would have enough to get the Tinkerbell tea set because he knew your obsession with fairies.
When you visited home for their high school graduation, you all cooked dinner and he overdid the glazed sweet potatoes, causing them to get stuck on the plate. You tried to hold your laugh but gave up once he started dancing; he was so embarrassed but that’s when he knew he’d willingly make a fool of himself to hear you laugh like that.
And 3 years ago, your large group of friends went on a ski trip. He was attempting to run up the slope but kept sliding, and even from a distance, he could pick out which laughter was yours; it was probably the only remedy to an otherwise heartbreaking weekend, considering that you were there with your then-boyfriend, Namjoon.
Reminiscing those causes his heart to feel like floating, like always, then the words “nobody dates my sister” pulls that heart down to crash into reality, like always, too, the reality being that you’re his best friend’s older sibling.
You’ve been off-limits since Jimin threatened Jungkook and their other friends about cutting off their dicks if anybody tried to date you when they were 16, but you were probably off-limits even before that. Jungkook mentally shakes his head.
He doesn’t like being told what to do but then again, Jimin is his best friend, the tiny feisty 10-year old who fought off the bullies who tried to take Jungkook’s snacks. It had been them against the world since then, and so far, the only person he thinks who’d ever come between them is you.
Jungkook is pulled out of his thoughts at your call of his name, prompting you to repeat what you just said.
“I said, thanks again for being there for my brother like, ever since. If it was just me I would’ve disowned him a long time ago.”
Jungkook giggles, already used to the drama that is your sibling relationship. He’d witnessed too many wrestling matches, scream fests, and pulled pranks in the last 15 years. While you’ve both gone past those, your complaints about each other is something you haven’t really outgrown yet.
“Well, I’m glad you didn’t disown him,” Jungkook chuckles, the words ‘he’s the only link I have to you’ quickly dissipating in his mind.
“You know he just craves your attention and riling you up is the way he does it, younger sibling and all. I would’ve done that if my brother wasn’t 7 years older. Jimin tends to be immature around you but he’s the best person I know. I wouldn’t have survived anything if it weren’t for him.”
This brings a smile to your face, their origin story warming your heart more than you care to admit. Your brother is fierce and a fighter, you’d give him that.
“Well, he’s just as lucky to have you, Kook.”
It’s the tenderness in your voice that makes him feel like he’d just won a prize, and he wishes you don’t notice the flush of his cheeks. If you do, you don’t mention it, because not long after, you say that you’ll wash up, signaling him that it’s time to go.
Jungkook drives home that night feeling like his pre-adolescent self, the giddy feeling of when you first pinched his cheeks the same one he feels right now. It’s when he first developed his crush on you - you’d been arguing with Jimin and said you wished he was as behaved and as adorable as Jungkook, prompting your brother to point out Jungkook’s large nose, which you responded with by saying it adds to his charm.
Petty fights, like always, but it’s when you told him to not listen to what other people say if they’re out to put him down did Jungkook realize that you and Jimin were cut from the same cloth.
Soon after, every little moment with you, every glimpse of your life outside of being his best friend’s sister became more and more enthralling to him. The fact that you were getting prettier each year just served to solidify his affection for you. And also made it difficult to hide his hard-on every time you’d show up for breakfast in your cloth shorts when he’d sleep over your parents’ house, or when he’d see you in your pretty outfits in the bars you all frequented once he was in Seoul for college.
He’d let himself think of you during the times he wasn’t in a relationship, and he’d slowly let go of the bit of hope he’d have every time you were in one, partly because your relationships were usually long-term, compared to his, and also because your ex-boyfriends were nothing like him, which is safe to say that he wasn’t your type.
Maybe it was the age, the level of maturity, maybe it was the sense of security, maybe he’s just not the kind of guy who could give you what you want, although honestly he doesn’t know exactly what that is.
But if Namjoon - your intelligent, upstanding, businessman ex-boyfriend who was also really handsome and kind - and your subsequent heartbreak are anything to go by, then Jungkook is clearly reaching for the stars with you. Not that you’re out of his league, but he’s more like in the outskirts, just lying in the edges, the border between what’s possible and what isn’t, but definitely far from the center of action. Even tonight, the most time you’d spent together in years that wasn’t in a party, was because Jimin had been hurt.
If anything, though, his long standing admiration for you hadn’t really gone away. And he doesn’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.
**
The weekend with Jimin staying with you wasn’t that unbearable, primarily because he was rendered immobile on your bed and was usually sleepy. You were thankful that Jungkook dropped by to keep your brother company while you caught up on errands and chores.
With another work week coming filled with meetings and events, you had Jimin stay with Jungkook first. He insisted it wasn’t a bother; his work as a freelance artist and a part-time tattooist gives him control of his time.
It’s the weekend after the incident when you hear a knock on the door, not expecting to see Jimin with his casted ankle and crunches; behind him are 3 large luggages and a few boxes.
You’re just about to process the sight before you when he says, “I got sacked from the company when I said I couldn’t get back to work next week. And I can’t afford to pay rent anymore, even if I get a roommate and I…” he turns to you, almost shameful, “I have nowhere else to go.”
You sigh because really, your relationship with your brother is hinged on fights you don’t really mean, pettiness that drives you crazy, and an unconditional love that you both deny but undeniably share. So you open the door wider and laugh at his “you’re the best sister in the world” claim and your usual response of “you only have one.”
Jungkook arrives with the last box and you help bring in all the stuff that seems never-ending, making you wonder how these fit in his car and how he managed to bring everything, including your brother.
“Park Jimin, you have so much stuff! You might as well have hired a mover,” you cry out.
“Oh I did,” Jimin answers, pointing to Jungkook.
You cock an eyebrow because obviously, movers get paid.
“I told him you said you’re gonna make us dinner.”
“Except I didn’t,” you scrunch your eyebrows and turn to Jungkook, amused at his sudden change of expression, bambi eyes widening at his innocence.
“I swear, he seemed so convincing,” Jungkook claims, hands held up as if in surrender. He bites his lips and looks at the ground. “I can just go, really. I’ll just force him to treat me to lunch when he’s healed and I can wrestle him if he doesn’t.”
“Don’t be silly, Kook. Stay for dinner,” you crack a smile. You walk to your kitchen and take out the pork belly to thaw. “I won’t make you steak though. That’s reserved for my wine nights when I want to bask in my singleness,” you call out.
“Also,” you turn to Jimin, “you don’t deserve my steak.”
Your brother laughs, knowing that it’s your way to mask the kindness you’re showing.
Later that night, with dinner out of the way and your spare bedroom set up for Jimin to stay, you guide him to the sofa bed and make sure his foot is elevated, bell just within his reach that you instructed him to ring when he needs you.
“Thanks, ___. You—”
“Are the best sister in the world, I know,” you cut him off.
“I was gonna say you should get some rest and to not worry about me. I’ll be fine,” he smiles.
You nod and head out the room, the worried look on your face not going unnoticed by Jungkook, who’d just finished wiping the dishes.
“Everything okay, ___?”
You heave out a sigh.
“What the fuck am I gonna do with him, Kook?” You ask, the reality of your injured and now unemployed brother dawning on you. “What am I gonna tell my parents?”
Oddly enough, it’s when you and Jimin were finally adults did your parents think to check up on you both. Perhaps living under the same roof didn’t warrant that, but with both children now living independently hundreds of miles away from them, they’ve ensured to call every week. Your conversations mostly revolve around Jimin, though, the words “take care of your brother” not having an expiration date, apparently.
You know the weight of the words - it’s not just because you’re older but because by your parents’ standards, you’re also the more stable and financially secure one by nature of your 9-5 corporate job in a fancy building that requires you to wear corporate attires, in contrast to Jimin’s late-nights in a dance studio busting moves in sweats.
Your parents are partial to your kind of work, given that they’ve spent more than half their lives in the same field and always wished you’d both do the same, even if you promised yourself you wouldn’t give in to the world that took so much of your parents’ time from you.
Much as you want to believe you’re just doing your job as the older child by entering the industry, you were too much of a people-pleaser who just wanted to make her parents proud.
Jimin, on the other hand, was smart enough to only apply to the performing arts programs of prestigious universities in Seoul and was good enough to actually land a scholarship in the same school as you; your parents were backed in a corner and couldn’t do anything.
You’d never tell Jimin but you always admired him for that; it takes a lot to stand up to your parents without actually standing up to them. You’re just glad that between the both of you, someone was brave enough to go for what they genuinely wanted.
“Tell them the truth?” Jungkook shrugs. “I mean, what’s the worst that could happen?”
“You act like you don’t know what my parents are like.”
True, Jungkook thinks, but he also knows things have improved on their end. “Well, if anything, they’re more receptive now. They would congratulate Jimin on the choreographies they’d see those idol groups dance. They ask him about work, too.”
You smile at the thought, something your brother never mentioned, but you can imagine how happy that might’ve made him. Jimin, as you’ve found out, is a sweetheart to his friends - affectionate in all ways and very expressive - something he isn’t to you and your parents. The same can be said about you, and you soften at the thought that you and Jimin really aren’t that much different from each other.
Jungkook picks up on the thoughts going through your head. “He probably didn’t tell you because you know him, he’d go all soft if he does, and Jimin has this persona when it comes to you. And it isn’t the soft one.”
“Goes both ways, I guess.”
“It’s not the end of the world, and he doesn’t seem to think so. He’s going to be fine.”
**
Jimin, in all sense of the word, is not fine. It took a few days until he cracked. He went from being an obedient patient who followed the doctor’s order of staying in bed, to one who constantly walked around and complained that he had nothing to do.
Going on dating apps makes him sad, looking at job openings makes him sad, not being able to move and dance makes him sad. And your heart breaks for him, knowing what it’s like to lose your sense of direction and motivation at the loss of something or someone important. You allow him to let out his frustrations, though, listen to him when he rants, feed him his favorite food, and call Jungkook over with his PS4 that isn’t actually broken.
In fact, calling Jungkook has been your go-to, especially when you’re running out of things to say to comfort Jimin. Most times it’s really just so they could play PS4 together, prompting Jungkook to leave it at your place so Jimin could stay preoccupied and not feel too down when the job lists come up empty. He tires easily though, and it’s after he’s been tucked in bed that you usually settle for a cup of tea in the kitchen, Jungkook now the one listening to you talk.
It usually starts with the topic of Jimin, followed by some memory from your childhood that you and Jungkook get hysterical over, followed by a story about your work, and then a story about his. His stories are more interesting though. He shows you the paintings and digital pieces he makes for clients, and tells you amusing bits about his tattooing gig like amusing patterns and memorable customers.
Hearing all this sends warmth through you because of how much he’s grown. While you’re only 3 years older, you met Jungkook when he was a shy 10 year-old, a complete opposite to you and Jimin’s naturally sociable selves. He went from smiling sheepishly to joking around and giving you high-fives in the 5 years before you went to Seoul to study.
Of course he’s grown when he followed your brother to the same university, having seen him with different girls, going to the same parties because your friends had taken a liking to him, and attending his art exhibitions. He went from greeting you under his breath to calling out to you at a bar while he’s surrounded by his peers.
This was the kid who used to follow your brother around - even joined the dance club in high school - and would dunk his head in water if you asked him to, but now he’s forged his own path, doing what he loves, and enjoying every bit of his time that he controls.
Personally, you’re also just happy that he can be available for your brother and for you, too, seeing that the nights you used to spend forcing yourself to sleep are now spent in good conversation with him.
He’s also gotten way more attractive in the past few years, something you’ve only noticed now. Perhaps it has much to do with the physical closeness when you talk - your kitchen bar isn’t that long, anyway - where you’re able to pay more attention to his defined jawline, his dark eyes that anybody could get lost in, the curve of his nose, and the perfectly-placed beauty marks on his face. Come to think of it, maybe Jungkook has always been handsome, but you stop your thoughts before they go anywhere restricted.
It’s one Saturday night when you arrive home, after having drinks with your friends, to a very drunk Jimin and a tipsy Jungkook, gorging on fried chicken. Just thinking of cleaning up is already giving you a headache, which is aggravated by your brother’s drunk singing of classic yet cringey sad love songs.
“Yah! Look at the mess you’ve made,” you smack Jimin’s arm, pointing to the chicken crumbs on the floor. “And alcohol, seriously? You can barely walk properly and now you’re drinking?”
“I’m injured, unemployed, homeless, and heartbroken. Leave me alone,” is all he says, then proceeds to belt out an insanely high note that pierces your ears and which causes Jungkook to laugh, used to this already and may have been enduring this the past hour or so.
“He’s been like this for the past 4 hours,” Jungkook says.
“And you let him?”
At the final high note, Jimin passes out on the couch, body limp over the empty space to his left.
“He wanted to drink his frustrations away, thought it might help,” Jungkook responds.
You sigh in annoyance but think he’s right, too. Jimin was out drinking his frustrations the night he got injured but at least now he’s doing it in the safety of your home.
“I guess,” you shrug. “Can you take him to his room before he severs his neck?”
Jungkook laughs but follows. He carries Jimin over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and you pretend to not look hot and bothered at how easily he could carry your dead-weight brother.
You follow to the room shortly and place an aspirin and orange juice on the side table, knowing it’s Jimin’s hangover drink. You remove the strands of hair that have stuck to his forehead and tuck him under the covers.
Jungkook looks at you fondly; for someone who always claims you should’ve disowned her brother, you sure have a very affectionate way of showing it.
You step out of the room and take in Jungkook’s tipsy state, red cheeks and glassy eyes giving him away.
“You should stay,” you tell him. “You drank and I doubt you’d sober up anytime soon, but try anyway.”
He nervously accepts but not for the reasons you think. He’s nervous because aside from those sleepovers at your house when you were younger, this is the first time he’s sleeping under the same roof as you, and that makes him giddy but anxious at the same time. He hopes you don’t catch him mid-dream saying your name; that would be too awkward to explain.
He goes back to the living room post-shower, a blanket and large pillow on the couch and you, tucked in the corner with a glass of juice.
“Did you want to sleep already? I can go to my room if you are.”
“No, it’s okay. I’m not that sleepy yet, you can stay.”
He refuses your offer of a drink. Unsure of the appropriate distance from you now that there’s space to go around, he settles on the other end of the couch. You smile at him as he sinks on the corner and he smiles back as you take baby sips from the glass. You both settle in comfortable silence, appreciating the quiet as a reprieve from the mind-numbing noise from earlier.
You take a big gulp and he couldn’t hold the chuckle at your wide eyes hidden behind the glass.
“So I’m guessing your hangover drink is apple juice?” He asks, not missing the similarity with your brother.
“Yeah. Jimin hates it so I’m sure he’ll never take it. He used to finish all the orange juice at home and I was mad because I wanted orange juice, too,” you say with a pout. Jungkook’s heart skips a beat at how adorable you look and goes for an ah, that’s why face because he remembers you fighting Jimin over it before.
“So you just switched to apple juice?”
“Yeah, pretty much. It’s really good. I thought he’d switch too just to annoy me but he said he really doesn’t like it.”
“Look at you two, being all civilized for once,” Jungkook teases. You throw a pillow at him and laugh at his comment, but you don’t disagree.
“Yah! We’ve always been civilized, okay?”
“Now that is a lie. May I remind you of the time you two wrestled in front of me over a piece of pop tart. How you tackled him to the ground and he pulled your hair and the innocent treat was crushed in the process.”
“Hey, I was 15 and I called dibs on the strawberry!”
“Or that time you both wanted to watch different movies and had me choose and I felt like I was signing a death sentence either way? But it didn’t matter because you still got into a pillow fight?”
“His choices were always so boring!”
“Or that time when…” You throw him another pillow.
“Yeah, yeah. I get it. We weren’t always civilized,” you give up, laughing so hard with him at the memories. “You witnessed the worst parts of us, huh?”
“I didn’t really have a choice, did I?” Jungkook cocks an eyebrow.
“Well, you were the only one who stayed. The rest of your friends would run out once Jimin and I started going at it.”
He laughs at this because if only you knew why he always stayed. He actually liked that you’d let him referee you two, he felt wanted.
“Hmm, it takes a lot to handle the Park siblings, I don’t blame them.”
“Wow, Jeon Jungkook. Calling out your elder. Where is this bravery coming from?” You tease.
“I drank, remember?”
“Not much though.”
He shrugs. He doesn’t know, too, but he likes seeing you look flustered. “Enough liquid courage, I guess.”
You deem his answer satisfactory but it does make you recall all those petty fights growing up.
“Sorry you had to witness all that,” you say, giving him a shy smile. “Our personalities were always just clashing and it was harder not to fight each other.”
“I think you two are just so similar, that’s why.”
You look at Jungkook, eyes wide at the statement you’d only ever thought to yourself.
“He thinks the world of you, you know?” He continues, sensing your now serious demeanor. “He used to tell the mean older kids that you’re his sister and you’ll fight them if they hurt him because he just knows you’d protect him no matter what.”
You laugh and roll your eyes but Jungkook knows you agree.
“For schoolwork, he would always write about you as his role model or the person he looks up to.” Jungkook doesn’t miss how your eyes soften at this. “He never found out that I knew but I’ve read parts, how he wanted to be strong and kind like you, to be independent and smart and hardworking like you.”
Maybe it’s the remnants of alcohol, or this apple juice is just fucking delicious but you’re getting emotional.
“And honestly, I don’t think that’s changed. He’ll always look up to you, whether he’ll say it or not.”
And there goes the water works, causing panic in Jungkook and he immediately goes to you. Noticing your non-movement, he uses the edges of his hoodie to wipe the tears that have begun flowing from your eyes. He stills for a moment but seeing how you haven’t pushed him away, he continues.
You look up at him with watery eyes and quivering lips. Somehow you should be embarrassed but something about Jungkook having seen the worst of you and being nothing but a huge help these past few weeks, you feel safe. No judgment whatsoever, just an air of understanding and care.
“Why are you telling me this?” You ask, and Jungkook feels weak at how you look. He didn’t mean to make you sad but all he wants to do now is hug you until you feel better.
“Because you’ve been so worried and so hard on yourself, as if it’s only your burden to carry.”
You try to object but he cuts you. “Jimin’s an adult. He’s crying and drinking and sulking but that’s normal. He’ll be fine and get himself together. I know that. Even he knows that. You know why? Because it’s what he’s seen you do.” Jungkook wipes another stray tear.
“Whether it’s a breakup or a work thing, he’s seen you take hits but never back down, never let anybody walk all over you, never let them take away the best parts of you. He’s struggled before, too, but he always got back up.”
“He’s good and strong that way,” you reply softly.
“Like I said, he has a good role model,” he smiles, nudging your shoulder.
It’s meant to be playful but it’s comforting for you, and you’re leaning on his shoulder before you know it, ignoring the way he briefly stills at your action.
“You’re a good person, Kook. We’re lucky to have you.”
You’re so close to him and he can feel the heat radiate from you. It’s too quiet that he’s afraid you’d hear the thrumming of his heart, from your words and the affection behind your still head on his shoulder. The situation calls for it, he thinks, so he lays his hand on your back and rubs circles on it.
He’ll chalk it up to liquid courage again if you ask, but you don’t. Instead you snuggle closer, chasing his warmth. He swears he could pass out with just this, but he tortures himself more by holding you even closer and he swears, even with his thick hoodie, he could feel your smile.
**
Over a month since the gutter incident - as you like to call it - you, Jimin, and Jungkook have found a pattern of cohabitation, and yes, that includes Jungkook, seeing as how he’s become a staple in your household and your life.
At some point, Jimin had sulked less and would spend his time watching dance videos to remind himself of the feeling, even if it was just virtual. He’d even expanded his choice of employment by checking job openings as a fitness instructor and a ballet teacher for children.
He’d also done his regular foot exercise once the pain became bearable. Still unemployed and heartbroken though, he’s been shameless in making your place his own home, with most of his belongings now removed from their boxes, and inviting Jungkook over any time, any day. Not that you minded though, since he’s been nothing but a literal angel.
Living in a studio on his own, Jungkook usually has ramen or street food as dinner, which is why Jimin used to invite him over his shared apartment with Taehyung so that Jungkook could at least have home cooked meals every once in a while.
It’s why he’s often over your place on weeknights he doesn’t have a shift at the tattoo parlor. That and because Jimin still wants him over to play video games. Jungkook brings food over or pays for delivery though, and you welcome the initiative.
On weekends, you’re all busy doing your own thing in the living room together, which carries over to movie nights. The young ones pass up on their friends’ invites to a party while you, well, your friends would rather spend their weeknights with their partners instead. So your night of basking in your singleness now means doing so with your brat of a brother and his dependable best friend.
It’s a Saturday afternoon when you get home from doing errands and you find both men in your living room, with Jimin reading a book on some dancer’s biography and Jungkook busy on his laptop. Your brother’s face pops on the screen and you decide it’s not a personal matter so you plop next to Jungkook on the floor and softly rest your chin on his shoulder, something you’ve maybe done once or twice before.
“What you up to?” You ask, an impressed look on your face at the snippets of Jimin dancing, some of which you’ve never seen before.
“I’m working on his application video,” he says, pointing to your brother. “Since he’s not able to dance when he tries for jobs, he thinks sending them a video to show his skills will help.”
“Oh, like a visual CV of some sort?”
“Yes!” Jimin states. “Want them to know what they’re missing out on, and that’s a lot.”
You roll your eyes but mentally agree; your brother is the most talented person you know.
“Kookie’s been kind enough to work on it for me although he’s been on it for hours,” he continues, a playful smile on his face.
“Give him a break, Chim. He’s done so much for you already,” you say, getting your own laptop and setting it up on the table.
“Nah, it’s the least I can do. He’s helped me so much, ___.”
“He fought off your bullies 15 years ago…” You cock an eyebrow.
Jungkook chuckles. “Yes. And more. Helped me with school work, my confidence, my social skills…”
“Gave him tips to woo girls because he was too shy to ask them on dates,” Jimin adds.
“Hmm,” you mumble. “What you gotta be shy for? Just flash them your smile or show them your toned arms, they’ll probably jump on you right there,” you say nonchalantly, unaware of the way Jungkook’s heart stills at your comment.
“He doesn’t want them to jump on him, ___. He wants them to actually like him, or love, whatever. He’s a romantic, you know,” Jimin teases. “Would travel to the ends of the earth or fight to the death for the woman he loves, whoever she is,” he says matter-of-factly, unaware of the way Jungkook’s breath hitches because if Jimin only knew.
“Aww, Kook. That’s cute,” is all you say, smile genuine though, he wishes he could see it everyday. But cute, really? That’s it?
He chooses not to dwell on it and instead asks you what you’re up to, to which you respond that it’s a presentation you have to work on. You’re frustrated at your lack of design eye and it looks so bare; you want it to look professional but still eye-catching.
“Maybe I can help!” Jungkook states.
But of course, you think. You’ve been accommodating an actual graphic designer in your home, surely it’s fair that he help you out, right?
“Yes please, Kook. I need to blow these people away with my smarts and my non-existent creativity,” you laugh.
Jungkook sets aside his laptop, adoringly quick to prioritize helping you, and works on your presentation. He knows just the right color and font combo, even helping out on which details to include, what visuals to add, and how to make it exactly how you want.
You’re amused at how easily he works on it. He's meticulous, working on the size of the texts and the angles of the patterns. Jimin chides him for his perfectionism but unbeknownst to both of you, Jungkook’s laser focus is a means of distraction with how physically close you’ve been to him the past hour, eyes flicking from him to the screen.
He wants this to last but also can’t wait for it to be over because of how nervous he is, especially with your constant praises for something really basic, but which he finds so charming all the same.
Pretty soon he finishes and returns your laptop to you and retrieves his, quick to get back to work and focus on something else, which still proves futile once you remove your sweater to reveal a camisole underneath, and tie your hair on a high bun, thus exposing more of your shoulders and neck.
He shakes off the tingles he feels, pretends to be completely unbothered by his attraction towards you that seems to intensify day-by-day. He looks forward to seeing you, and when he doesn’t, he yearns to. He’d been used to admiring you from afar but these past weeks showed that he has all the reasons to admire you even up close.
You’re just as brilliant, feisty, and funny; sassy too like Jimin but in a captivating way, yet so kind-hearted just the same.
The three of you settle in a comfortable silence, each busy with your own task at hand. With your knees touching Jungkook’s, your questions on any additions you make on the presentation, and him asking for your approval on the video (which he seeks, oddly enough from you and not from Jimin), your eventual quick agreement on dinner and your teamwork in preparing it, it all feels so familiar, like it’s home.
**
The next evening, you find yourself sandwiched between Jungkook to your right and Jimin to your left, who moved from his center seat to lie down, with half of his tiny body settled comfortably on top of you and Jungkook. Your brother insisted on watching “How to Be Single” tonight, like a slap to all your faces.
It’s during one of the scenes with the protagonist’s ex when Jimin randomly asks, “___, do you regret breaking up with Namjoon?”
It may seem like a question out of left field, but with everything that’s happened, Jimin has been quite reflective lately, particularly about love. He’s had his fair share of partners but unlike you, is more a feeler than a thinker; gets out of relationships as fast as he gets into them; takes it one day at a time whereas you always have to consider the future.
You don’t need to ponder on the question; you’ve gone through this multiple times with your best friends but never really with your brother.
“Sometimes. But there was too much on the line and it was unfair to both of us if we carried on.” You sigh, recalling the moment you both decided it wouldn’t work. “It was something we had to do but doesn’t mean it hurt any less.”
Jimin hums, thinking back to the days he’d barge in your apartment and ask for leftovers when really, he just wanted to be near you so you had someone to cry to, just in case. That was over 2 years ago and it took you a year to finally say that you were over the relationship. He used to note your choice of words - “I’m over us,” never “I’m over him.”
Next to you, Jungkook is picking on his nails, unsure if he should be part of the conversation. He’d heard about the break up since you had common friends. It was quite the shock, knowing how you and Namjoon were.
You pick up this nervous habit, aware that he might not know what really happened. It wasn’t a secret but there was more to the story.
“We just wanted different things,” you say then turning to both of them, “so you two better make sure you’re on the same page with the person you date, talk about what lies ahead, what you want, what you’re willing to compromise and what you aren’t.”
“That’s good advice, yeah Kookie?” Jimin says.
“Why you focusing on me?” Jungkook asks.
“You’re the one focused on the dating, not the settling. You avoid those conversations.”
“You don’t want to settle?” You ask, now curious. You’ve seen him with girlfriends but thinking back now, his relationships never really lasted.
“It’s not that,” he glares at Jimin. “I’m more of a live-in-the-moment kind of guy. Thinking about the future is great, I mean, any mature individual does that, it’s just…”
He heaves out a sigh, hoping he’s not shooting himself in the foot with his statement. “What good is the future if you don’t take care of what you have right now? Isn’t the present more important because it’s what’s assured? The future is literally dependent on that, so the now is what I want to focus on.”
He rests his head on the couch, nervous of your reaction. He knows you’re a planner, needs to see things far ahead to know what to do.
There’s no one way to go about life, he acknowledges that. He just doesn’t want you to think he’s not a serious guy. With his developing feelings for you, not seeing him as a potential partner is literally the worst thing that could happen.
Jimin continues with the movie he paused but in your mind, all you could think about was what Jungkook said. If you and Namjoon hadn’t obsessed about the future, would things have been different? Would you still be together?
The sinking feeling comes at the realization that maybe they still wouldn’t. What if your ‘present’ with him then wasn’t good enough in the first place? That the “could be” was more exciting than the “what is”? Suddenly there’s clarity, you just don’t know if it’s the good kind.
Still, it doesn’t keep you from sinking further down the couch until you’re leaning on Jungkook’s shoulder. And like the few times that you have, there’s a comforting feeling in the act.
“You must’ve made your ex-girlfriends really happy, huh Kook?” You ask, head shuffling near his upper arm. “Focusing on the present and the moments and all that.”
You wish it was something you did, but Namjoon was just like you.
“I guess you could say that,” he answers shyly.
“But that was just it though, right Kook?” Jimin says. “Made them happy but not enough to fall in love.”
This prompts you to look at him, wide eyes full of questions. “How come?”
He turns to you and if he tried enough, Jimin right behind you would blur and there’s just you, overhead light illuminating the best parts of your face which is, well, everything. You’re absolutely breathtaking.
And at your question - how come he never fell in love - comes his own realization. For all of his talk of living in the moment, tucked in the corner of his mind is the thought of the future he’s only ever dreamed about, the one that he’s always wanted, well, with you.
“I - I actually don’t know.”
**
Adopting your brother, and by extension Jungkook, isn’t as bad as you expected. Sure, Jimin is still a diva and annoys you just because he wants to, but he makes you laugh more, compliments your cooking more, and encourages you to go out and have fun. Most times you do, but if you’re being honest, you’ve been enjoying time spent with him and Jungkook more.
Your movie and PS4 nights are chaotic and only egos are harmed. You and Jungkook help Jimin with job hunting, monitor his practice dancing, and watch dance videos with him. Two months since the gutter incident, you’ve gone to the park, the beach, and the river, perfected making choco-walnut cookies, and built fairy houses.
Your days are more tiring yet satisfying, as if your apartment actually feels like a sanctuary, save for Jimin’s provocation leading to your bickering, but even that has become a welcome addition in your daily life as well.
Jungkook though is altogether a different story. You two have gone grocery shopping together more than once, had spent some mornings on a run, and some weeknights he even picks you up from work then you both grab some of Jimin’s favorite food for dinner. Those are on top of the many nights you’ve spent drinking whatever in the living room, bidding him goodnight either out the door or on your couch. You’re not exactly sure what to make of the giddiness but you shut down whatever unusual feeling there is before they start to mean anything more.
**
It started with a missed deadline, then an oversight of a risk, then your workmate Chul getting the last laugh. Sometimes, no matter how good you think things are going, all it takes is an extremely bad week, made up of extremely bad moments, to make you doubt yourself. You think some more, then you end up doubting everything else.
Am I good enough for this job? Can I really make a career here? Is this what I really want? Is this going to make me happy? Why the fuck am I still single? It’s the sudden feeling of uncertainty that overwhelms you, makes you second-guess, and suddenly you’re not as stable and secure as you thought you were.
It’s this feeling that you carry over the day after at your friend Jin’s and his wife’s baby shower. Between their growing family, Yoongi’s hit-making record label, Hoseok’s renewed contract as a travel show host, Yuri’s PhD, and Na-eun’s engagement to her college boyfriend, you feel so… lost. Like you’re just getting by, just letting time pass until there’s something big and meaningful to look forward to again, whatever that is.
Of course your friends would never make you feel any less; that’s really on you, which is probably worse.
The party is on full swing; gifts have been given and time has come for full-on socializing where you all get to talk about how great your individual lives are. Except for you. And maybe Eun-ha on the corner who doesn’t seem to be happy being here, but that’s not your problem.
Somewhere near the bar is Jungkook, beer in hand and clearly enjoying himself. He’s a staple in events like this and he fits right in with everyone else - self-assured, content, in control, and may be on his way to a date, seeing as how that pretty girl hasn’t left his side all afternoon. Not that you were monitoring, though.
For once, you’re actually hoping Jimin was here so you can whine together, but the group he used to choreograph for invited him to their concert, so there’s that.
You’re on your third glass of champagne when you head inside Jin’s enormous house, away from the laughter and obvious put-together lives of your friends, when you see him, the man who was once your embodiment of stability, of a “good and secure life,” as your parents had said.
He sees you, flashes his dimple-bearing smile, and walks towards you, looking extremely good in a white polo and denim jacket, brown hair slicked back.
“___!” He greets, his arms immediately engulfing you in a tight hug, providing you the physical warmth that you haven’t felt in a while. You sigh into him, your head on his firm chest, his now sturdier frame but a reminder of the time that's passed.
You linger, prompting him to gently stroke your back like he used to after a long day at work.
“You needed this, huh?” He observes, voice low and comforting.
You release yourself from his hold and look up at him, his sweet smile a contrast to his commanding presence.
“Unfortunately,” you sigh.
“Boss still not giving you due credit? Colleagues still not making it any easier? Stress still at an all-time high?” He asks, and it’s either he still reads you so well or your problems - or you - haven’t changed one bit.
“You’re just not your usual energetic self,” he continues. “I mean, I haven’t seen your genuine smile since you arrived.”
He’s been watching you? Somehow that sends heat to your cheeks and quickens your heartbeat.
“Just tired, is all. Plus, Jimin’s been living at home after a little accident,” you finally respond.
His face makes this charming worried expression. “House already a makeshift wrestling ring?” He laughs.
“You’d be surprised at how little damage there is in my apartment. Safe to say we’ve grown up,” you say, wide smile finally adorning your face, which he returns. You haven’t felt this light the whole week.
“It’s nice to see you again, Joonie.”
**
You and Namjoon find a spot in the large living room, with the 2-seater couch being the only one available, the physical closeness making it difficult not to be mesmerized by his gorgeous face. His laugh is still the same, the feel of his hand under yours is still the same; the attention he gives, his thoughtful and wise words, and ability to make you feel cared for haven’t changed.
You’re smiling more, eyes sparkling for sure, and you can’t help the way your body reacts the way it does - knees chasing his, hand tucking your hair behind your ear, voice going a key higher.
He’s still the same confident and self-assured man that you fell in love with, that you once saw a life with. It’s almost intoxicating, the way he speaks, sees the world, sees himself. You could easily fall into this again, into the ideal, the safe and secure, the expected, the could be. You think of the reasons why it didn’t work out, of what you chose when you decided to call it quits. His phone rings. He excuses himself but you still hear him. And you’re reminded why.
“I’m sure the gown looks beautiful, love. I’ll leave the party soon and meet you and our parents at the wedding planners’ office. See you in a bit.”
Your heart should be breaking but it’s just your pride that does.
“I’m sorry, it was my uh—“ he says, unsure.
“Your fiancé,” you smile, as if reminding him.
“Yeah it’s… it’s pretty recent and we uh… we’re planning to have it in 3 months,” he explains, eyes turning sullen, lips curling into an apologetic smile.
“Congratulations, Namjoon. I’m so glad you’re happy,” you say, hoping he picks up the sincerity in your voice.
He sits across from you again, hand on top of yours, his smile hopeful, and for the first time, you see him struggle with what to say. So you don’t give him a chance to.
“What are you still doing here?” You playfully nudge him. “You have somewhere else to be.”
“You’ll be okay?”
“Of course. Don’t worry about me.”
He lingers this time. Maybe in another life you would’ve worked out, you would’ve loved each other better, you would’ve fought for each other. But not in this.
He leans forward and places a soft kiss on your forehead and you shut your eyes, absorbing all the words he wishes he could say. I’m sorry. I will always care about you. I hope you find your happiness, too.
Your eyes follow him as he walks out the door, out to the woman who could definitely give him what you couldn’t. From across the room, a pair of eyes follows your movement too, the way it has since you entered the party four hours ago.
**
Whatever worry you initially had about getting drunk at your friend’s baby shower is out the window. You don’t mind anymore, not with your 5th glass of champagne and your 3 shots of vodka because of course, it’s Jin. You laugh along with your friends although you’re too dazed to process what they’re saying.
Your jaw is sore from laughing over things you don’t understand so you decide to head inside, maybe call it a night and take the drinking back to your place; at least you’d be in your pjs and not in a tight dress and heels.
You’re pulling open a door that just won’t budge and you exert what little energy you have, causing you to trip on yourself only to be held steady by strong hands on your waist.
“That’s a sliding door, ___,” the familiar voice says, tone low but still teasing.
You turn around and meet chocolate eyes looking down at you and you stare back even in your embarrassment.
“I… I think I’m drunk,” you stutter.
You’re met with laughter. “No shit, ___. Think I didn’t notice that?”
“I…” You say, looking down at the hands still holding onto you.
He quickly removes them, worry painting his face and you wave him off before he could apologize.
“Let’s go to a bar, Jungkook.”
**
You reasoned your decreased alcohol tolerance to your friends, which they didn’t buy but waved you off without much fanfare. They probably sensed you were out of it for a while. Or probably saw the exchange with Namjoon, who knows.
But you’re now at a bar eating chicken wings and fries like you’re about to run out of food, the guy next to you chuckling and reminding you to breathe every once in a while.
You finish your meal quickly and pout when you realize he’s barely touched his food.
“You’re not eating,” you state the obvious.
“Sorry, too entertained,” he laughs, the child-like sound now so familiar, you’d recognize it anywhere.
He’s just smiling at you and you feel so small under his gaze. He saw you talking with Namjoon, taking shots, and almost tripping earlier. He’s probably wondering who this person is; definitely not the one who’s been semi-housing him the past few months.
You bury your face in your hands. “I’m so embarrassed,” you cry out.
“Hey now,” he says, hands gently removing yours from your face. He stops the one tear before it falls off.
“God, how many times have I cried in front of you, Kook? This is humiliating.”
“No one’s counting though,” he states. “It’s your drinks I’m counting and I’m thinking maybe you’ve had enough.”
You nod and he orders a can of soda and a glass of water. With light chatter and glasses clinking in the background, you two fall in comfortable silence. He’s quietly picking on his food, eyes roaming the bar while yours flit from him to the space between you, somehow wishing it isn’t as wide as it is right now.
“I had a bad week,” you finally say. He nods.
“My friends are all accomplishing so many things, achieving their dreams and I’ve been stuck in the same company for 5 years.”
He nods again.
“I’m a 28 year-old who got drunk at a baby shower and flirted with her ex only to find out he’s engaged.”
Jungkook pretends not to be affected at the confirmation that you were indeed flirting with Namjoon but he nods just the same.
“And?” He asks.
“And? I’m in a bar with you, and I cried, and I’m acting like a baby because I had a terrible week and ended up doubting everything and now think I can’t get my life together. I mean, between my brother I can’t properly help, a job I can’t seem to stand out in no matter how hard I try…” You release a deep breath. “And a relationship I couldn’t keep because I wasn’t enough and I…”
“Hey, don’t say that,” he says angrily. “You’re none of those things.”
“I wasn’t sure if I wanted to have kids. And Namjoon always wanted to be a father,” you blurt, the words not stinging as they used to.
This stuns Jungkook. Jimin had always mentioned it was a mutual breakup but never said anything more. Jungkook didn’t think it was because of this.
“I thought I wanted a family, too. It was so easy to fall into the idea of that kind of life with him because he was the perfect person to have it with. But then one day I just started doubting it,” you sigh, recalling how hard you used to be on yourself for suddenly wanting something different.
“Sometimes I think, what if I gave myself more time, what if eventually I’d be sure?” You take a long breath. “But the uncertainty was too much and it wasn’t fair to him,” you huff. There was no blame game; you both knew it wasn’t anyone’s fault.
“Quite the dealbreaker, huh?” Jungkook wonders.
“Yeah but looking back, the other issues were just bubbling under the surface. The future was so enticing and we talked about it all the time, it seemed much more important than well, us,” you explain.
“It was Jimin who made me realize that I hung onto Namjoon for the relationship, the potential, what it meant. He was the epitome of stability and I was the same for him but at some point, even that wasn’t enough.”
“So, earlier. Why did you, uhm,” he starts, hoping it doesn’t come out wrong.
“Flirt with him?”
Jungkook nods.
“Being with him used to make me feel like I had it together, you know? Like I had it figured out because he did and it was silly but I don’t know, maybe I wanted to trick myself into thinking that by being close to him in any way, I had it together.”
“You don’t need to have it together all the time. You just need to have it together enough.” His whole body turns to you.
“You had one bad week, we all do. But it’s over now, isn’t it? Your friends doing well in their careers? So are you. You know what not to compromise on, what to stand up for, which battles to fight. I’ve heard enough of your stories to know that there are people at work who respect you, look up to you. The way your friends, your brother, and I look up to you.”
Your lips are quivering, forcing yourself not to cry again tonight. He just always knows what to say. “That’s really sweet, Jungkook.”
“Thanks, but I wasn’t trying to be sweet. I was just being honest. You’re a lot of good things to people, ___. Isn’t that what matters? Being a little off at work and drinking then flirting with an ex don’t make you any less of a person. Okay? You’re allowed to slip up every once in a while.”
You let this sink in.
“Look at you, Jeon Jungkook. When did you get this wise? It’s like I just blinked then you’re all of a sudden so grown up.” You tease to keep yourself from breaking down.
“Like I told you, much of what I know, I got from Jimin. And what he knows, he got from you. Maybe try listening to yourself, yeah?” He smirks.
You nod, smile creeping on your face the same way all the heat is rushing to your cheeks. You feel comfortable like this, being vulnerable and sad and doubtful but he’s holding you close without touching you, making you feel safe with just his presence. In the now noisy bar, your bodies angling towards each other, and with his tender smile, you feel a type of intimacy you’ve never felt before. It’s reassuring yet enticing at the same time. And this scares you.
You both stay for another hour until you decide it’s time to head home. Jungkook had taken a cab, too in anticipation of drinking so you both decided to walk back to your apartment, knowing the couple of blocks would be enough to sober you up.
The streets are still alive with the nightlife just starting but the noise starts to tone down once you reach your neighborhood. The long walk is soothing, as Jungkook leaves you to your thoughts, except for the times he has to steady you because, well, your vodka shots are still in your system and a walk isn’t enough to flush them down. Still, you’re calm, a feeling of acceptance overtaking you.
“Thanks for tonight, Jungkook. I hope I didn’t ruin any potential date or anything just because I couldn’t get the door open,” you laugh.
He raises an eyebrow.
“That, uh, girl seemed really into you,” you stammer.
He chuckles, hands in his pockets and cheeks flushed at the implication of your observation.
“That wasn't much, we were just chatting.” He turns to you. “I could see your scrunched eyebrows from where I was and thought you needed help,” he shrugs.
You sigh. He was always helpful, ever since he was a kid.
“You know, you were always the good guy. Jimin’s other friends were so rowdy and immature. Yugyeom was always sprawled on the couch with his feet up like he owned the place; Sejun was always finishing our ice cream, and Sunghoon was such a flirt.”
Jungkook laughs, recalling the times you were scolding all of them for messing up the house and being so annoyingly noisy and eating your snacks.
“You were always the well-behaved and mature one. Like, you barely engaged in their pranks and stupid boy talk. You’d rather watch it all unfold until it was too much and you’d help me in the kitchen always. I remember your glazed potatoes. God, that was so hilarious.”
“That was embarrassing.”
“It was funny! And adorable. You were always so kind.”
“Thanks but uh, I wasn’t trying to be kind. Well, sort of. I wanted to impress you. And I—” He doesn’t know where this is coming from but it’s like word vomit, especially now that you’ve started to walk more slowly and are looking at him.
“It was an opportunity to be near you. Kinda wanted a lot of that back then. Even now, actually.”
You gulp, unsure of what to feel or how to react. You thought you were imagining his lingering looks, or how his eyes shone a tad brighter and his smile was a bit wider when you were around. But he’s not saying what he’s saying, right?
“I, uh. Well, maybe you look up to me like an older—“
“Don’t say sister because I never saw you as one,” he interrupts you, frustration laced in his voice as if the word is venom. “Not when I was a teenager, not in the years after, and especially not now.”
You hesitantly turn to him, his nervous face a contrast to the offended tone of his voice just seconds ago. He nibbles on his lips, a mannerism you noticed when he was a teenager who always seemed shy around you and would only relax after you talked to him.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbles. I didn’t mean to sound angry. I just—“
“That was your angry tone?” You tease, your laugh affirming him that you’re not upset one bit, just… unsure. You’re flattered, definitely; he is a very attractive man. Still your brother’s best friend, though.
This eases him, but prompts him to test the waters.
“I’m a gentle boy, what can I say? Most times, at least,” he says, and you don’t miss the playful tone of this voice, his eyes peering down at you, making your breath hitch and your hands clammy.
You wrap yourself with your arms - really to wipe the sweat off because you’re feeling nervous - but Jungkook takes this differently, as anyone would, and immediately unzips his jacket and puts it on you.
You slow on your tracks and you feel even warmer. He follows your pace but urges you to speed up once he feels a droplet on his cheek. You’re glad you opted to wear low heels today, tiring your calves only a little but allowing you to walk fast enough until you’re on the steps of your apartment in time to miss the sudden downpour.
Well, Jungkook doesn’t because as he enters, a portion of his torso is wet, his black shirt sticking on his skin to tease you of his toned abs that you definitely will be thinking about tonight. Between that, his damp hair, and soaked veiny arm, you curse your mind for the images it’s currently making up.
All he did was indirectly tell you he has a crush on you, right? Or did he? He doesn’t seem as bothered as you expected him to be if that was the case so maybe you misinterpreted?
You can’t stand this wet version of him so you say you’ll get him a towel but are too flustered so you hit the wall as you turn towards the bathroom, eliciting a loud “ow!”
“You okay?” He asks worriedly.
“Yeah, still drunk I guess,” you lie. He smirks and probably knows you’re lying.
“I’ll take care of myself, don’t worry. Go wash up and get ready for bed.”
“Are you ordering me around?” You ask, trying your best to reestablish yourself as the one in authority because you can’t take how this man is making you feel nervous and unsettled and not in control.
“Do you want me to?” He simpers, flustering you even more. What is with him?
You roll your eyes and trudge to your bathroom. You’re technically sober but with Jungkook’s looks, the sudden flirty tone of his voice, and his innuendos, you might as well be drunk again.
You open the door and seconds later he’s by your bedroom, a glass of water in one hand and apple juice in the other. The bottle of aspirin is tucked under his arm by his rib and he asks you to get it and you think he's evil for testing you but you take it, acting unbothered. He follows you to your room and you don’t stop him.
Glasses now on your bedside, you tuck yourself in. “Thank you, Jungkook.”
“For what?”
“For staying with me? Listening to me?” You test the waters, too. “For caring for me?” And his smugness disappears. Before you is a man, all strong and tough yet his smile is the tiniest, softest you’ve ever seen on him, and even from where you are, you could see the tips of his ears turn red.
“I really appreciate everything,” you conclude, and you mean it.
He gathers himself before he looks you in the eyes. “Don’t worry about it. Anything you need, just tell me.” You nod.
“Sleep well, ___.”
**
You don’t sleep well. In fact, even with the rain pouring outside, you feel so hot, you end up shedding your shorts.
The closeness with Jungkook has been gradual and if anything, it’s been comfortable. You convince yourself what he has is probably just a little crush; convincing your heart to still is a different story.
Jungkook, on the other hand, can’t stop smiling. He was testing the waters tonight, gauging how you would react to his flirtation and teasing. It was partly the alcohol but then you’d gone all shy and flustered; he thought it was worth a shot.
He was half expecting you to scold him like you used to do with Sunghoon, or berate him like those guys at work but you did neither. You don’t seem to hate him, even with his indirect confession to you, and that’s really better than what he’d hoped.
**
You wake up dissatisfied with your sleep and take your hangover necessities; dealing with Jungkook last night did add to your inebriation.
You head out to the kitchen to prepare some beef bone soup to help with the headache, hands trying to remove the sleep from your eyes. You move like you’re on autopilot like most post-night out mornings and then you hear someone gasp.
“Shit, woman. Learn your manners and put some clothes on,” Jimin shouts.
It wouldn’t have been bothersome had Jungkook not been here but of course, he is. Next to your brother, eyes wide and definitely trying not to look at your bare legs. It dawns on you that you indeed removed your shorts because of that very man and your face contorts in shock and embarrassment.
“Fuck. Jimin! Grab me my shorts on my bed, please!!!” You cry out and stand behind the counter.
He’s too scandalized to complain so he rushes to your room and you feel so hot all over. You avoid Jungkook’s face at all costs, which apparently is what he’s also doing.
Jimin throws your shorts on your face. “Get yourself together, jeez,” he scowls.
“You’re the one invading my space, okay, both of you,” you bite back.
Jimin’s making faces like he always does when you scold him and Jungkook sits next to him, chuckling.
“I shouldn’t have welcomed you, you brats. I’m used to walking around my apartment in my underwear so this is a lifestyle change.”
“Oh god, shut it. Nobody wants to imagine you without clothes on,” he cringes.
For some reason, your eyes find Jungkook, who visibly gulps. You glare at both men, and Jimin responds with an evil smile.
You return to what you were meant to do and start getting ingredients. Jungkook starts to feel bad and approaches you, mumbles to Jimin that he’ll just help.
Jungkook appears next to you. “Did you mean that?”
You sigh. “I didn’t. Of course you two are welcome here.”
“I was referring to the other one,” he says with a low voice.
Your eyes widen and you smack his arm. “What is wrong with you? Stop teasing,” you loud-whisper, but he doesn’t miss the way you try to hide your laugh.
“You’re cute when you’re flustered,” he smirks, and you get flustered even more.
You’re a 28-year old getting scandalized over playful comments by this ridiculously good-looking man and you feel so pathetic but you can’t deny that it’s exciting you. It’s been a while since you’ve had someone flirt with you and pay attention to you like this, make you all giddy and entranced as if you’re an adolescent getting her first love letter or being told by her crush that she’s pretty.
There’s playfulness there but affection, too. You see it in the way he stops the teasing and smiles to himself, then proceeds to help you cook, looks at you with fondness while you eat, then forces Jimin to clean up with him.
This continues for the next few weeks. His lingering looks on you are more flirty now and he smirks when you look away and try to hide your flushed face. His tone of voice when Jimin is nearby is lower, as if he’s telling you a secret.
He no longer stiffens when Jimin moves to the corner of the couch and kicks you closer to Jungkook so that your brother can make space for himself. In fact, it’s the opposite now, with Jungkook finding ways to be near you - when the three of you are on a grocery run, when you’re all on the couch for movie night, and especially when Jimin opts to sit on the floor - shuffling closer, knees grazing each other’s.
You’ve kept your head to yourself, fighting the urge to rest it on his shoulder and he definitely noticed this, so he’s started to edge you, in a way. The once lingering finger touches when he hands you something are no more, so are the “accidental” elbow brushes.
He stands close to you just enough for you to feel the heat off him but not enough to feel him. His arm over your chair leaves his hand thisclose to your shoulder and you swear you can feel the sensation even then.
You’d stopped smacking him after this one time he flexed his bicep and you started to imagine how good those arms must look.
You found out shortly after when he and Jimin convinced you to join them in the gym because Jungkook had a voucher to a free yoga class since a client of his is a teacher; safe to say she wasn’t happy when he popped in the studio to say you were taking his slot. Jungkook and Jimin did a workout, your brother now in a better condition.
After the session, they made you wait as they finished and Jungkook really had to remove his red jacket to reveal his stupidly gorgeous toned and tattooed arms in a black fit sleeveless top. He caught you ogling and the devil crossed his arms to fucking flex and smirk when the conversation he was having with one of the trainers didn’t even seem that amusing.
Of course, his outfit just sent your mind into another dimension with the images of what could be underneath that black top and again, you find out one morning exactly how glorious it is.
It’s one of those post-bar night mornings - you’ve allowed Jimin to enjoy the nightlife again as long as he had chaperones, which essentially were you and Jungkook. You’d woken up and stopped by the hallway at the sound of someone gasping and you look up from the hallway, slack jawed as you watch Jungkook pull his shirt off from the back of his neck with one hand, coffee-stained clothing lying on the counter.
His black sweatpants are hanging low on his hips and does he not have any boxers on?? His tiny waist spreads out to his muscular back, and when he turns, his sculpted chest almost blinds you; pecs just the right perk and torso so taut but not intimidating at all. It’s... beautiful. It looks so smooth and captivating; your eyes can’t help but trail down south and is that black ink that’s peeking underneath the waistband? You gulp at the thought of Jungkook having a hip tattoo because what the fuck? Is he trying to kill you? And his…
“Do you have a shirt I can borrow?” He asks, and you jerk from where you’re standing.
Your eyes turn to the appropriate body part they should be focused on and he’s smiling like he’s an angel, as if he literally didn’t just try to murder you with his exquisite bare body.
His smile is so sweet and you know he’s playing you because he totally caught you drooling at the sight of him. Your throat is dry and suddenly you can’t speak, which really isn’t surprising by now because he’s also taken away your ability to form coherent sentences.
“I, uhm. I’ll get one of Jimin’s.”
“I don’t fit in his clothes. Don’t you have large ones?”
He knows you do, and you nod, unclench the thighs you didn’t even realize had betrayed you, and retrieve one of your oversized Disney t-shirts and approach him. You stay at a safe distance because any closer you might fall into temptation and you throw him the shirt.
He chuckles and turns to his side to slowly put it on because of course there’s a fucking dent down there that he wants to show off.
You turn and trip on your foot because god knows how dizzy you feel from the show he just put on.
“Careful,” he calls out and even with your back turned, you just know he’s smirking.
He beats you to the bathroom shortly after and he took his time.
You decide to wait with your brother who’d been so ecstatic over an audition he landed for a fairly new and small entertainment company as a choreographer for a hip-hop group.
They told him his contemporary dance background and versatility are just what they need and you soften at his joyful face; he says he feels like a new person again. You listen to him excitedly and give encouragement.
You perk at the sound of the bathroom door opening because you really need to clean the wetness down there and you trudge out of the room so you could finally shower, slightly upset at Jungkook’s clothed form.
You groan. “Ugh that was so long,” you mindlessly say.
“Oh it is.” His smirk is back and you are pissed. You bang the door and pull your hair out of frustration.
He doesn’t even need to touch you for you to be a whimpering mess. He knows it. And you’re in trouble.
**
Jungkook is busy for the next two weeks, having shared that he has a couple of on-site art installations outside of the city and a tattoo piece that will need more than one 5-hour shift. You tried not to seem affected when Jimin teased him since it was going to be on a woman’s breast this time.
“This the same one who had her vagina tattooed? The one who asked you out after?” Jimin asked.
Your eyes were burning your phone screen because you absolutely cannot be affected.
“Yeah,” Jungkook laughed. “That was fun.”
Jin calling you was your saving grace and you spent the next half hour in your room, talking to him over nursery room ideas because Hoseok couldn’t make up his mind over a neon green or a fuschia pink wall and Yoongi wanted dark grey because “babies can’t even identify colors,” which is true but Jin needed you as the one with a more palatable taste.
Jungkook had knocked to say goodbye, which is more than his usual yelling, and you noticed him linger before you heard the steps away from your door.
**
It was day 5 when you realized why you’d been so grumpy and you hated the moment you did - you miss Jungkook. You’d gotten so used to seeing him every few days - picking you up from work, playing rock-paper-scissors to determine who’ll choose dinner, laughing at his high-pitched child-like laughter, talking to him about work and other things… you even miss his flirting and teasing.
He’d been such a staple in your life the past months, and not just to referee between you and Jimin. Jungkook, with his listening ear, his heartwarming passion for his work, and ability to soothe and comfort you in the silence, just feels so stable. And not in the way you used to think. He’s so laid-back and just there, always dependable, like you’re sure whatever it is you’re feeling, he’ll know what to do and say.
Jimin used to say that Jungkook was always the person he needed for anything and now you understand why. He emits a certain calmness, joy, and consistency, like whether you’re flying or drowning, he’s the pillar grounding you or keeping you afloat.
You’re always tempted to send him a message but you two don’t text and it’d be weird to just start now, although it doesn’t help that he doesn’t text you, too. You shrug it off and convince yourself that it really might just be a silly crush, one he acts on when he’s around you but probably forgets when he isn’t. Or maybe he went out with that girl, who knows?
On the day that he arrives, he's set to drive Jimin to the audition and watch him, too, while you’re just happy to be able to do errands and clean the house on your own.
The doorbell rings and Jimin, whom you’ve reminded to shower so he won’t be late, answers the door and you try not to look intrigued when you hear him rambling about how good Jungkook apparently looks because how else can he look better?
With ash-grey hair, that’s how. You couldn’t help it. You peeked and turned your head before he could turn to look at you.
You’re currently by the kitchen counter, tiptoeing to try to get the cereal box on the top shelf to check if you need to buy another or if it would suffice. Or if it’s even still edible. You’ll be off for a quick grocery run if only you can get this stupid box out.
Then a large hand is touching your lower back and the fresh scent of detergent fills your nose. You stiffen as an arm is raised to easily grab the cereal box you’ve spent the past 5 minutes trying to get and fuck do you miss his touch, his scent that you realize is just as comforting as his soft sweatshirts, and the way you feel a jolt of electricity even at the slightest brush of his body on yours.
He places the box on the counter. “You should’ve asked,” he says, voice low.
“I can do it,” you respond, gaining the courage to look at him and your lips betray you at how they part because he looks so good with his new hair.
“I know. I just like it when you ask.” He tries to keep his eyes on you but they keep falling to your lips, the one he’d been imagining the feel and taste of. But your eyes lock on his, letting yourself be hypnotized.
You feel his touch drift away from you and you stop him, as your hand finds his and keeps it on your waist, and it signals him to grip tighter and pull you closer. And you let him. You angle yourself so you’re standing chest to chest, you could almost feel his heart beat just as fast as yours.
“What else?” You indulge yourself because you just wanna know. You've missed him and you can’t reconcile the flirting with his recent silence.
Jungkook bites his lip, knowing it’s his signal to tell you how he feels.
“I like it when you say my name, when you listen to me talk and take me seriously. When you don’t make me feel bad about the things I do, the things I choose.”
His hand that isn’t on your waist glides through your arm, leaving goosebumps in its wake. It settles on your cheek and you hope he doesn’t notice just how hot it is.
“I like it when you pout and when you smile with your eyes,” he continues. “And I like it when you need me because then I know I’m not the only one, because fuck do I need you,” he continues, both hands pulling you closer to him until his breath grazes your mouth.
“Want you so much,” he mumbles, before he eliminates the distance and you feel his soft lips on yours, moving tenderly, carefully, as if the purpose is to seek validation that you feel the same way, to ask your acceptance of the overwhelming affection he has for you.
Your lips move gently like his, languid yet electrifying and euphoric and you hold onto him for support, just so you won’t lose yourself even more than you already are.
This now feels surreal. You’re not thinking about anything else - not the before or the after - just the feel of him at this very moment and how it’s making you feel alive, carefree, unbound. And you wonder if all your other kisses had felt this good before. Or maybe just different.
You and Jungkook keep your steady pace, focusing on the soothing feel of each other’s lips, of the sensation of something sensuous and tender.
The aggressive pull of the bathroom door jolts you awake from a dream it seems, and you’re ducking down and crouching on the floor behind the counter before your brother notices anything amiss. Jungkook’s surprised but holds his laugh at how scared you look, the first time he’d seen you be afraid of your brother.
“Kook, has my sister left for the grocery?” He calls out from his open room, probably dressing as he speaks.
Jungkook looks up to check on Jimin. “Yeah, she just left,” he answers after deciphering your hand gestures from underneath him.
“Ugh, I forgot to tell her to buy my cereal. I think the one on the top shelf isn’t edible anymore.”
Jungkook smirks, thanking the heavens that Jimin didn’t tell you, otherwise Jungkook wouldn’t have had the best kiss of his life. He felt you; you moved with him, you felt him. And he can’t be happier.
He has a chance with you. He really has a chance with you, and even at the risk of being caught, he’d do this with you over and over again.
“Let’s go,” Jimin calls out. “I’ll just text her.”
“I’m sure she knows,” Jungkook smirks then heads out, leaving you with a dazed feeling and a heart that won’t slow its beating.
**
Your time alone with your thoughts only served to confuse you even more. It felt nice. He felt nice. You’d never really considered Jungkook as anything more than, well, your brother’s best friend, even if he’d been the one you preferred out of all of Jimin’s friends dating back to middle school.
His well-behaved nature and boyish charms were always endearing to you and even when he grew up, his confidence and compassion just amazed you. But it was always from afar. You think it’s the same with him; his affection may just be a little infatuation borne out of his idea of you growing up. You’ve learned enough that the idea of a person, of a relationship, of a could be isn’t always enough.
Another thing you think about is that Jimin is very protective of his friendships. You know that more than anyone, when you dated Taemin in high school.
You were both seniors and had gotten close because he was Jimin’s dance captain and mentor, someone whom your brother looked up to and admired. Your relationship ended during your first year of college, with both of you saying things you eventually regretted. Safe to say it was your first heartbreak, one that resulted to Jimin’s as well, as his friendship with your ex was also affected.
You and Jimin barely talked about it, seeing his own disappointment because of the resulting strained relationship with Taemin. You thought that the elder would at least maintain a friendship, but he didn’t.
The most Jimin said about it was when he told you, eyes downcast but tone quite angry, to “keep off my friends and don’t date any of them, please.” You were home for a break and he stormed out of your room before you could apologize. You realized later on that his heartbreak was worse than yours; you told yourself you don’t want to be the cause of that pained look on his face ever again.
His friends are off-limits, he made it pretty clear. Taemin was a mentor but one Jimin eventually did without. But Jungkook is his best friend, his brother. They’ve looked out for each other for more than half of their lives; you can’t even imagine what would happen if you and Jungkook get together and then fight, or break up.
You wouldn’t want Jimin to have to give up a friendship that means more to him than anything. Or more accurately, you wouldn’t want to lose Jimin over something that might not mean as much anyway.
You stick to the latter thought, especially when both men arrive home and Jimin is beaming, his smile something you’d never admit actually makes your heart feel all sorts of fuzziness and pride. He’s so excited and you feel it, too, moreso because he informs you that he got the job.
“They really liked me! They said I can really mentor the group and their team is so creative and passionate…” Jimin goes on, narrating every single thing that happened right as he entered the studio. You’ve never seen him this elated, not even with his previous company that was at the top of their game.
“And they said I don’t have to work right away! They’ll wait for my doctor’s clearance but I can go to work to observe and get to know them more.”
Your eyes moisten because not long ago, you saw the joy in your brother wither away, his passion deteriorate, and his plans go on a standstill. But now, it’s like he didn’t go through a slump or moments of weakness, like he didn’t go through a depressive mode when he thought he’d lost everything. He’s really a fighter, and you truly look up to him.
“I wouldn’t have made it if it wasn’t for you two,” Jimin continues, pulling both of you in a three-way hug because of course your brother wouldn’t hug just you.
This prompts Jungkook to wrap his arm around you, hand gripping your waist while yours settles for mere pats on his lower back. He tries not to dwell on this minimal contact, or on the way you purposely avoid his gaze. He tries not to think too much when you actively lean towards your brother more during your dinner out, or how you jerk away when any of Jungkook’s body parts comes in close contact with yours.
He’s thinking maybe you’re not in the mood for his playful antics or maybe, he really pushed too far with the kiss from earlier, and it sends him in an internal panic mode because just as his hope of starting something more with you was blooming, it quickly gets shot down just like that.
It’s when you pass up on games and drinks in your living room when you get back so you could just stay in your room did Jungkook think that he may really have blown his chance.
**
You try to be subtle in your avoidance of Jungkook but it’s harder than expected, especially since Jimin still invites him over. With the excitement of the new job now steadying, Jimin announces his checklist for getting through a crisis - healed foot, check; new job, check. That’s pretty much it, really. “But I still need you two,” he says.
Jungkook comes over and at the start, you notice how he still tries. He attempts to catch your gaze, goes near you, engages you in conversation, makes jokes, lingers before leaving… only to be met with eyes that don’t seek him, short answers, forced laughter, and cold goodbyes. And you absolutely hate it.
He’s around yet you miss him even more than when he was away, but you can’t fall into the things that made you feel something for him in the first place.
Living with Jimin made you appreciate him so much more, and you’re glad you get to be this close with him for the first time, and you don’t want to jeopardize that.
Jungkook had much to do with the newfound attachment with your brother, yet it’s exactly why you’re hesitant to give Jungkook a chance. Their relationship is sacred, similar to how yours with Jimin is. What you and Jungkook have is a by-product of those, and it’s not the priority. Somehow you think all three can’t coexist; you can’t have it all, really.
Whenever Jungkook makes an effort, Jimin’s plea to keep off his friends rings in your head. You know, too, that Jimin gave his friends an ultimatum - date my sister or keep your dicks, something like that. It was funny when you heard of it, but it’s definitely not a laughing matter now.
Those words were said years ago yet they still hang above your head. You wish Jungkook would just make it easier for you, but why is it that when he stopped trying did you feel your heart break, as if you’re losing something you never had in the first place?
**
It’s easy to reason you feel sick and tired; you’ve been spending later hours at work so spending more time in your room and asking the boys to make dinner instead seem reasonable. But tonight, Jimin isn’t having it.
“We’re celebrating, stay here,” he says, pulling you to the couch next to him. Jungkook is on his right, his once tendency to stiffen around you back again, and you sadden at the thought because he looks so uncomfortable.
“Celebrating what?” You ask, grabbing the beer being handed to you.
“I’ve been working for 2 weeks and I haven’t reinjured my foot,” he says, his smile blinding you.
Normally you’d roll your eyes at his shallowness but you just agree and mindlessly sip the beer, eyes veering off in the distance.
“Is it a guy?” Jimin asks out of nowhere and you try not to choke. “You only ever get this sulky when it’s about a guy. Is it someone from work?” Jimin states with furrowed eyebrows.
“Oh! Is it one of the managers who’s been trying to ask you out but he’s the ex of your close friend?”
You try to remember when you told him that but it was definitely a months-ago issue.
“Or did you have an epiphany and realized you actually like Yoongi? Or Hoseok? Or maybe Jin but he’s married?”
“What the hell, Jimin!” You say, smacking his arm. Your eyes flit to Jungkook who’s focused on the TV.
“The first one,” you lie to satisfy your brother.
“It’s kind of a code, you know? He’s Yuri’s ex and she really loved him and I don’t want to ruin my friendship over something I’m not sure is worth it anyway.” And with that, you see Jungkook’s jaw clench. He knows about Yuri and the manager; they were merely a fling, so he knows you’re lying.
“How do you know it’s not worth it if you haven’t even tried?” Jimin asks, incredulous.
“I don’t know, it’s just… Yuri’s my friend and I don’t wanna mess up a friendship.”
“Seems like you don’t trust your friendship with Yuri enough, then,” Jimin states like it’s a fact. This hits your more than it should. Do you really not trust in your relationship with your own brother? Surely you have a basis to be hesitant, but if it only it were that simple.
Jimin picks up on your silence and asks again. “How are you and the guy like? Do you have moments with him?”
“Lots of them,” you say, your eyes finding Jungkook just on the other side of the couch and he’s never felt farther away.
“And for the first time it’s like I get to savor them. Whether it’s something sweet that he does, or if we’re just together in silence, or when he’s being flirty,” and you don’t see it but Jungkook catches you smiling at the thought and god does he wish you’re lying about this one unless it’s about him. He wishes it is.
“Sounds like a keeper if he gets you to enjoy moments, don’t you think? For someone like you?” Jimin says, cocking an eyebrow.
“Like me?”
“You think too much, you know? You plan, you analyze, you manage risks… I mean, yeah sure they help I guess but this isn’t a job, ___. There’s no profit to be earned here, no losses,” he points out.
“The only loss is you missing out on something good because you’re too focused on what could happen, and not what’s actually happening, right now.” He's told you a variation of this before, but somehow this hits differently, and more than it should.
“Did you teach that to Jungkook, too?” You ask, a smile creeping up and you digress because you need anything to stop you from walking to Jungkook and holding him close to you.
“No, he taught me that,” Jimin states. “I know it seems like I teach him a lot - well, all I really told him was to never let anybody dictate what he wants and deserves in life, and I stand by that, but to be clear,” Jimin turns to you, “I learn just as much from him. He’s his own self; nobody tells him what to do.”
It’s all meant to be assuring, comforting even, if only Jimin knew. And if only it were that simple. The tension is suffocating but your brother breathes easy. You love him more than you can ever say and his happiness has meant more to you than you ever imagined. You just wish your own didn’t come at a cost.
**
A few days later, Jungkook is back at your place and you had quite the reflective week and opted to stay in your room.
Some days you just want to bask in your own thoughts; absorbing yourself in your own emotions helps in figuring out what to do, you’ve realized. You’re still a thinker and a planner - that’s probably never gonna change - but you’re starting to at least let yourself feel and enjoy the now, or something like it. You just wish the person you want to spend your now with hasn’t changed his mind.
It’s almost midnight when you decide to head out, your early dinner long digested and you feel hunger creeping in.
You exit your room and stop in your tracks at the sight of Jungkook in your kitchen, all alone. You definitely weren’t ready for this.
“Oh, I didn’t know you were still here,” and you regret it immediately, not wanting to sound disappointed.
He looks up, alarmed at your presence because he wasn’t expecting this, too.
“Jimin fell asleep on me but don’t worry, I was just about to leave,” he responds, eyes not meeting yours.
“He’s also gonna be coming over my place now since he’s able. Don’t want you to feel like a prisoner in your own home,” he says, motioning to your room where you’ve been hiding recently.
“Since you’re avoiding me and all,” he continues, and you don’t miss the hurt look on his face.
You mentally give yourself a pep talk because you definitely want him to still come around and you’re definitely being stupid.
“I… I wasn’t avoiding you,” you say, blocking his way by the couch as he’s about to reach for his jacket.
He stops in front of you, ensuring some distance. “Yeah, I guess. I mean, you were just not minding me and making sure you stayed as far away from me as possible.” He’s trying to sound bitter but you’re his weakness and he will always go soft on you because his tender eyes are definitely not a match to his bitter words.
“I just didn’t know what to do. You didn’t exactly say what you felt and—“
“I kissed you, ___,” he says, tone suppressing frustration.
“I told you I needed you, wanted you. And you kissed me back. The way you looked at me that day, the way you held me… it meant more, I could feel it. So I don’t know how you could just act like none of that happened, like it didn’t matter,” he continues.
“Jungkook… you’re my brother’s bestest friend. And he’s very protective of his friends, of you.”
And it’s ironic, Jungkook thinks, how Jimin is the reason why you two had met, got close; how Jimin’s what got you together but is also who’s keeping you apart.
“He’s also the one who constantly reminds me to go for what I want, to never let anybody tell me what to do,” Jungkook says.
“Yeah but this is different. I don’t want anything to come in between you two, the same way I don’t want anything to come in between him and me.”
“So it’s okay for him to come in between us? You really think he’d be okay with that? That he’d keep the two people he loves the most from being together? From being happy?”
And you hate that he’s right.
“What Jimin is to us is out of our control,” he states. “But that shouldn’t be why we can’t try, right? Because god I’ve wanted you since I was 15 and and I’ve waited too long for this and I’d either fight for us or keep us a secret, I don’t care. Just don’t lie to me, please.”
By now he’s standing in front of you and he could pin you against the armrest if he wanted to but he’s keeping his hands to himself, fists clenched at the control he’s trying to maintain because of his intense feelings for you. He’d make you feel it all too, if you just let him.
You can move away if you wanted; there’s space for it. But you don’t. Jungkook bared everything to you, braving through just to be with you; the least you could do is be honest. So with your own strength, you look up at him.
“You made me fall for the moments, Jungkook. You made me fall for you, and there were so many things to consider and I—“
Your rear hits the armrest, as you’d reflexively walked back as he started to move towards you, slowly eliminating the distance. His arms, sandwiching you, are propped on the couch to support his spread out frame, his face now level with yours. You’re burning with how he’s looking at you with so much hope and yearning.
“Go on,” he says, voice low, his eyes wandering all over your face and you feel your heat dampen with just his gaze.
“I didn’t know what to do with what I’d started to feel for you because you were off-limits but that didn’t keep me from wanting you and—“
His lips graze the side of your neck and with your breath hitching, he proceeds. Open-mouth kisses trail your neck, with just enough wetness and just enough heat to leave you wanting more. You angle your neck for more access and he smirks at this.
“And what?” He urges you, mouth focusing on the other side of your neck now, head nudging yours to adjust.
“And I avoided you because—“
You grip the couch for support, as you unravel with his hot breath on your skin.
“That seemed easier than to keep at what we were doing knowing that—“
He licks a sensitive part by your ear and your strangled moan spurs him on.
“I couldn’t have you the way I wanted to.”
At this, he stops.
He focuses his gaze on you again. Jungkook holds onto the tiniest shred of self-control he has left just so he can savor you like this, emotions unraveling and your body falling apart before him.
“How exactly do you want me?”
You steady your breath and as much as you want to give in to your carnal desire and attack his lips, you want him to know how much this means to you. You’re still scared but being with Jungkook steadies you, makes it all feel worth it.
You’re crossing this line now, and you’ll stick with him whether you’ll both come clean or keep it a secret. He wants you enough right now; you’ll figure out what to do eventually.
Your hand finds his face and fingers trace the scar on his cheek. You let yourself drown in his beautiful eyes, knowing on clear nights you could see galaxies like this.
“I want you close, Jungkook. I want you to hold me, when I’m sad, happy, confused. I want to hold you that way, too. I want to savor every moment, let you know everyday what you mean to me.”
Your featherlight touches on his jaw send shivers all over his body and he hums at the sensation. You caress his lips before he could bite them again, palming him with your thumb and feeling its softness.
“I want you to fall apart under my touch, want to make you feel good, kiss you like it’s always the last time.”
Jungkook thinks he deserves a prize for how well he’s keeping himself together and not yet taking you on this couch like his dick is telling him to. But he needed to hear all that, needed to look in your eyes while you said them.
Then you smile at him, eyes filled with desire, and that’s all it takes for him to lose his resolve and plunge into you, your plush lips against his soft ones, melding together again like a literal dream. He straightens his stance so his hands can cup your face and he feels you smile in the kiss, relishing in the care and attention he’s giving.
It starts tenderly then quickly turns heated, his eager hands trailing down your arms and waist, and your own entangling his hair, pulling the strands as he nips your lips, prompting them to open.
Your tongues explore each other’s mouths, his lingering taste of rootbeer somehow making him more addictive. You swallow each other’s sounds, both of you still having half a mind to tone down, knowing that only a wall separates your wanton moans and your sleeping brother.
His grip around you tightens and you pull him closer, your hands now around his neck, fingers thumbing his cheeks and you’re losing yourself to him, as the past few months of undeniable attraction and sexual tension climaxing at this moment where you finally give in to what you’ve been trying to suppress.
Jungkook, on the other hand, feels a sense of calm even with his hard dick and his thumping heart because he’s dreamed of this, dreamed of you, and you’re here wanting him, too. All the memories of watching you from afar, blushing at how beautiful you are, missing you when you were away, heart breaking at how happy you were with someone else, fly by him like a movie because he’s got his ending - you.
He’s lived for moments most of his life and always knew to savor them, to bask in them because he doesn’t know when he’ll get to have those again. But nothing comes close to right now with you and he decides to make sure he’ll have you like this everyday.
Both your actions continue, hands stationary but mouths eagerly moving against each other, stopping momentarily for air but smiling, laughing in the kiss.
You give in first, fingers slowly trailing down to graze at his chest and he shivers, curses mid-kiss and you giggle, and he’s on cloud 9 again, realizing he can hear the beautiful sound that is your laughter everyday.
Suddenly it’s all thoughts of what’s ahead for both of you, imagining what that would be like - feeling, holding, touching each other. You’re both so lost in your little world, minds traveling from now to tomorrow and it’s exciting, so incredibly alluring to be savoring this moment but also thinking about the next.
You’re light-headed now because kissing him is like a drug, soothing yet exhilarating at the same time and you’re aching to feel him. “Jungkook…” You whine.
And then.
“HOLY SHIT,” you hear a gasp.
Your eyes burst open and you feel Jungkook stiffen before you try to push him away. You both stull, looking at each other, some distance now between you, and you can hear a pin drop with how quiet it is, the tension so thick that you’re afraid to move.
You knew at one point you’re gonna have to tell Jimin but not now and definitely not in the middle of a fucking make-out session.
“Is this a hookup or are you both finally out of your asses and would actually like to properly date because god knows it’s about time?”
You and Jungkook slowly turn to the side, eyes wide at your brother who’s leaning by the wall, checking his nails as if he didn’t just give you a heart attack.
“WHAT?” You ask.
“Jungkook’s been into you since forever but never had the fucking guts to do anything.” Jimin sighs and rolls his eyes at the man. “You’re not exactly subtle with your staring.”
Jungkook can’t seem to wrap his head around what's happening because his mouth keeps moving but no sound comes out.
“Neither are you,” Jimin eyes you this time. “You forget I’m good with reading people. And also, I’m friends with Yuri. She doesn’t even remember that guy,” he laughs because of course they’re friends. You feel so stupid; you should’ve known he was trying to catch you in a lie when he asked if your sulking was because of a “guy.”
“So you’ve always known?” Jungkook finally finds his voice.
“About you, duh. She’s recent,” Jimin points to you. “It’s like, one moment you’re friendly then you’re flirty then it’s like you can’t stand each other. Get your shit together, people. I’m literally right here.”
God, you and Jungkook were definitely not subtle. And underestimated your brother, too.
“So you’re not mad?” You confirm.
“No.”
“But… you said you were gonna cut my dick off,” Jungkook stammers.
“And you told me to keep off your friends because of Taemin,” you add. “You stopped being friends because of me,” you remind him, voice almost a whisper.
Jimin takes a deep breath because now he has to come clean.
“We stopped being friends because of him. He hurt you, ___, and you didn’t deserve that,” he admits, avoiding your questioning gaze. “I heard you crying to Jin about what happened and I got angry and wanted you to stay away from my friends because they were all assholes.” He continues, jaw clenched at the memory. “Well, except for him,” he cocks his head towards Jungkook.
“He was the only good guy. I never really minded if he went for you because... iknowhe’lltreatyouwellandyoudeservethat,” Jimin says.
And you’re not gonna lie, you feel like crying. Jimin’s been trying to protect you all this time.
Jungkook, on the other hand, isn’t taking this all too well.
“You said you were gonna cut my dick off…” He says again, tone low and unbelieving.
“That didn’t stop you, did it?” Jimin counters, earning him a sigh of defeat because he has a point.
“I just wanted it to happen naturally,” he explains. “I mean, I didn’t plan on getting heartbroken, injured, unemployed, then homeless all at once but it happened and you both helped me and that unintentionally brought you together and I…”
He turns to you both. “I realized how good you are together. Not just in taking care of me but in taking care of each other, too.”
By this time, Jungkook has found his feet and is back to standing in front of you, his hand intertwining with yours. You let out a laugh because this whole time, Jimin wasn’t in the dark. But then again, he’s a smart ass too and would’ve figured it out.
And would also push it. “I actually got over Taehyung months ago so like, I’ve been okay for a while,” he shrugs.
And just like that, he gets on your nerves again because that’s how he’s been getting his way, by reminding you of his “broken heart that’s still hurting.”
“You little bitch! Do you also have a new apartment now and you’re not telling me?!” You shriek, and Jungkook next to you is finally laughing.
“Oh no,” Jimin responds. “I’m really still homeless.”
And he smiles his sickly sweet smile and you can’t help but mirror it. Your brother is really something, and you don’t know what you’d do without him.
Some seconds pass and you’re just all basking in this moment because for the first time in months, it really feels like things are looking out for all of you.
“So in that case,” Jungkook turns to you. “Would you like to go on a date with me?” Hopeful eyes staring at you, a weight off his shoulder now that he doesn’t need to hide anything from his best friend. He can just focus on falling in love with you and making you do the same.
“Yes,” you excitedly reply, hand trailing down his chest again. “And in that case, would you like to continue this in my bedroom?”
Jungkook feels his dick twitch. “Fuck, yes.”
“Guess I’m gonna have to sleep on the couch now,” Jimin groans, but you don’t miss his playful tone. “You’re both welcome, idiots.”
**
You’re pushed to the wall right as the door closes and Jungkook’s lips meet yours immediately. It tastes much sweeter knowing there’s no need to hide, to be careful. It’s liberating and it’s making you feel more.
He kisses you harshly as his hands make quick work of your shirt, pulling them off then slowly kneeling down in tandem with his mouth sucking, licking, and kissing down to your breasts, then your torso, causing your chest to heave at the pleasure from just his mouth.
His hands aggressively pull down your bottoms and his tongue finds your clit before you can even process his action. He’s nibbling your bud and laving at your lips and pumping his fingers in you all at once, you don’t know where to focus.
You feel the desperation and intensity with every move, the sensation overwhelming and eliciting lewd sounds from you. He alternates between moaning and cursing on your cunt and that just adds to the pleasure.
“Eager, aren’t we?” You ask with a smirk.
“You have no idea,” he responds, head buried between your thighs, one of which is currently resting on his shoulder. “Some of my wet dreams may have been because of you.”
“What the fuck Jungkook!”
“I was a growing boy with raging teen hormones!” He says in between breaths. But he doesn’t relent. Fingers curling in your hole, tongue swirling on your clit, and hand squeezing your ass, he’s determined to make you cum now, and with a hard suck, you do.
You jerk away at the oversensitivity with his mouth still on you and you pull him up to give him a kiss, tasting yourself on him.
At the sight of you bare, eyes half-lidded and steadying breath, he stills.
“Is everything okay?” You ask.
“Yeah I just…” He starts, stepping back a bit, and his eyes roam your body, smile creeping up his face. “I never thought I’d get to have you like this. I always admired you from afar and you always felt so out of reach and I…”
“Jungkook,” you stop him.
“I’m here with you right now, barely any distance. I’m not your best friend’s sister, okay?” Your hand reaches out to him and he takes it, let’s you pull him closer. “I’m the girl you like whom you’ll take out on a date after you fuck her senseless. Got it?”
“Y-yeah,” he stammers, a shy laugh escaping him.
You kiss him softly. “No need to admire me from a distance anymore. You have me, right here.”
“Okay.”
And before he can attack you again, you lead him towards your bed. Your fingers pull the waistband of his sweats as you sit on the edge and look up at him, wide eyes eager for something.
“Shirt off,” you say, and he follows.
Your eyes meet your hands that are slowly ridding him of his remaining clothing and you swear you could come again at the sight of the tiger lily tattoo resting on his hip. It curves with his semi-defined v-line, the stem trailing downward, like some pathway to his throbbing dick that’s leaking with some pre-cum.
You take him in your hands and he bucks at the feel of your soft skin around his length that’s aching to be inside you. Your eyes stay on the tattoo; something about it is so hot and you kiss it, lips then exploring the expanse of his hip and up to the part of his torso that you can reach, feeling the ridges of his definitely smooth abs, now tensing at the sensation.
All the while, your hand is stroking his member, up and down as you continue kissing and licking his pelvis and just like this, he already tastes so good. He grunts with your ministrations, head falling back at the intense pleasure. His hands fall to your hair as you take him in, tongue traversing his dick and your heat clenches at the salty taste of cum and the feel of his veins as his shaft twitches in your mouth.
At the vibration caused by your moan, he stops you, removes himself from you and then lays half your body down on the edge of the bed.
“My turn,” he says smugly.
You’re about to protest but he swirls his tongue all over your cunt again, the pad of his thumb flicking your nub and you moan his name instead. You haven’t fully recovered from your first orgasm yet but he seems determined to give you another one. He’s eating you like a man starved, as if he plans to slurp you dry.
“More, Jungkook,” you breathe out, then he’s pumping his dick and thrusting into you, the stretch just a tad bit painful but so, so good.
He quickly adjusts, spreads your legs open for his easy access and the view, and he growls at the supple flesh that's taking him so well. It’s so erotic, watching himself go in and out of you like this, then hearing your deliciously hypnotic moans louden as his hands start kneading your breasts like it’s some dough he’s molding to his liking, his fingers flicking the hardened nipples.
“You feel so fucking heavenly, ___,” he pants. “Fuck, fuck. Can’t believe you’re mine.”
“All yours, Kook,” you respond, delirious now because his movements are really sending you to another dimension. “Fuck me harder,” you beg, and he follows.
He adjusts again, flushing your legs against you and the angle in which his dick hits your sweet spot causes your eyes to roll to the back of your head.
You’re screaming expletives and it’s just urging him to go harder, deeper, faster, his sweat trickling down his temples and forming on his chest.
“Cum for me, baby. I need to feel you,” he huffs.
He’s in a frenzied state and he’s losing himself in you, his mouth now parted and he joins your filthy wails, which are in tune with the sound of skin slapping on skin.
You feel your body spasm and you call out his name before you give in, heart stopping for a moment and he feels the stream of your cum coat his dick that’s just savoring this a bit more.
But you clench and it’s all it takes, his own seed spurting in you and your back arches as he comes down from his high by languidly kissing your breasts, one hand around your lifted waist and the other, intertwining your hand.
“Fuck, you feel so good. So much better than I imagined,” he utters, sounding so winded at the intensity of his orgasm.
He’s too tired to even move, body now resting on top of you, chest heaving and bated breaths escaping him. You massage his head and he moans even at that and you laugh but soften at the intimacy of it all.
He finally gets himself off you and you chuckle as he sneakily opens the door and tiptoes to the bathroom, careful not to be caught naked by your brother. He returns with a wet towel, wipes you, then lays next to you, his arm secured around your waist.
He’s smiling so fondly, lips now peppering kisses all over your face. “You’re stuck with me,” he states.
“Nowhere I'd rather be,” you reply, your own soft kiss now turning greedy again, and you think it’s gonna be a long night.
**
You wake up tired but you’re not complaining. It was quite the evening, after all, and you’re reminded by the fluff of grey hair adorning your chest. Jungkook likes to cuddle, you’ve learned, and he couldn’t sleep without a part of his body touching you.
You release from his hold and head to the kitchen after washing up, not expecting your brother to already be eating his cereal.
“Oh my god, can you wear shorts?” He huffs.
“Bitch, you’re in my apartment,” you bite back, laughing at the face he makes.
Your front is to the counter when Jungkook approaches and unlike before, heads to you, arms wrapped around your waist from behind and places a kiss on your cheek. “Good morning.”
His voice is hoarse and you hold back a moan because it just brings you back to last night when after you came the second time, he fucked you softly for your third, then fucked you hard for your fourth, then softly again this morning for your (extended) fifth. God, this man will be the death of you.
He nuzzles your neck and you giggle.
“Manners, you two. You’re like teenagers,” Jimin scowls.
“Well, I am living my teenage dream,” Jungkook announces.
Jimin grimaces but softens at the look of his two favorite people looking so happy. “Okay, this is gonna take some getting used to.”
You and Jungkook playfully nod in agreement.
“Also,” he turns to Jungkook who’s now managed to tear away from you. “Are you gonna be here again tonight because you know, I kinda wanna sleep on a bed and all. Couch is great but like, no.”
“You better find your own place soon if you don’t want to keep sleeping there every night,” you reply smugly.
“Okay, now gross!” Jimin, dramatic as always, pretend-gags at the implication. “I’m gonna look for places. Jungkook, you’re still my best friend. We’re going apartment hunting tomorrow.”
“But…” You start.
“No. Nuh-uh. You had him last night and you’re going out on a date today. You need to share my best friend.”
And you all laugh at him throwing a tantrum. He and Jungkook start to bicker and you walk towards your room to grab shorts because it really is awkward when your brother is there.
The doorbell rings as you’re about to walk back and you open the door, a surprised look on your face.
“Hi, is Jimin there?” The person asks.
**
You head back to the kitchen, your guest in tow and you call out to your brother.
“Chim, someone’s looking for you.”
Jimin looks up and almost falls off the chair.
“Taehyung?” He says, trying to mask the nervous tone of his voice. “I…”
“I have something to confess,” Taehyung cuts him off, eyes nervous but hopeful. “Can we, uhm, maybe talk somewhere else?”
Jimin nods and quickly follows him out.
You walk back to Jungkook and he tugs you close, hands back to your waist. “What’s that about?”
You bite back an excited squeal as you think back to what Taehyung told you at the door.
“Let’s just say, you might not need to help Jimin look for an apartment anymore,” you respond.
Jungkook smiles and pulls you in for a hug, reveling in this absolutely perfect moment.
“You Park siblings drive me crazy, you know that? And you two make me so damn happy.”
##
masterlist
#jungkook#jungkook fic#jungkook x reader#jungkook smut#jungkook fluff#jungkook angst#brother's best friend#hold me close#oneshot#mine
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𝐨𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭 — mason mount
summary: you and mason mount were polar opposites — you thought you hated each other. until you’re sent clubbing with him and a few friends.
notes: requests are still open!
“I’m not your princess.” + “Are you hurt? What happened?”
for @masterclassbaby
If there was one thing you’d realised to be complete bullshit within the dating world: it was that opposites attract. Because they in fact do not.
You were an easygoing person, you enjoyed spending time with your friends, even if that meant at a club for five hours, but you’d prefer a barbecue with drinks. And being the only single lady in your group left, they made it their mission to set you up. They’d searched high and low for a worthy suitor, to find Mason Mount. One of your friend’s boyfriend’s friends.
He was also an easygoing person, was very fun to be around and always made people laugh. But as they introduced the pair of you, it hadn’t gone to plan — it had gone worse. You’d clashed over a debate, disagreeing with each other completely and now you refused to go anywhere with your friends if he were there. It was clear their plan had failed, and that the pair of you just didn’t like each other.
But Declan was adamant. He knew you quite well, he knew what made you laugh, what your interests were, and technically, you lined up perfectly with this man. So whenever one of your friends would host a barbecue, they knew you’d say yes, and Declan would invite Mason, claiming to not have known you were coming. The barbecue was a disaster. Once again, you’d disagreed on something and spent the whole evenings in different rooms.
But whenever you’d talk or see each other, not willingly, he’d use that horrible nickname. Princess. It was ghastly. He’d heard you ask for a specific rosé to go with dinner once, and ever since then he’d seen you as completely high maintenance. And labelled you as a princess. Your friends thought it was the beginning of a blooming relationship, but Mason quickly shut it down. Saying, “as if, if she’s fussy about wine with dinner, she’s fussy about men.”
Your friends were really pushing this dating thing on you both, but you weren’t having any of it. You’d be caught dead before you were being intimate with this man boy. It seemed that every time you were hanging out with your friends, Declan was with Mason, and the two of you would spot each other again.
“Happy with your wine, princess?” He sneered, grabbing the glass you’d poured for yourself and sipping on it, all whilst maintaining eye contact. He was an asshole, a hot asshole.
It hurt, but you couldn’t deny he was your type. He was just so handsome, and the way he interacted with Declan and the people he actually liked, you could see why he was a good friend. But to you, you didn’t get on. Not at all. There was a tension, and you could quite name what it was. Mason seemed to hate you.
Mason couldn’t deny you were attractive, because you were. Declan showed him your Instagram, and he was almost drooling at you. But meeting you in person, the way you both interacted, it didn’t work the way he thought it would. It’s not like he hated you, he’d sometimes hide a laugh after a joke you made, trying to not inflate your ego. There was just something about you, he was sexually attracted to you, sure, but he enjoyed toying with you. It was a long game of teasing to him, slowly getting you to fall for him. He didn’t think you’d take it the wrong way and assume he hated you.
“Clubbing tonight, babe?” A friend had asked, catching you on the phone just as you left work. You knew what they were doing, you’d ‘accidentally’ bump into Mason again. It’s like they wanted you to fight.
You sighed and started your car up, phone squashed between your cheek and shoulder. “Sure, where?”
You heard a few giggles in the background, matching one of them to Declan. He had a distinctive laugh, more like a cackle. “That place we got like 28 free shots from,” your friend reminded you, “sound good?”
“What a good night that was.” You reminisced, turning out of the car park of your work building and making your usual route home. “Sure, I’ll be there.” When you’d gotten home and showered, you’d held onto the glimmer of hope that Mason would actually change how he felt about you. That he’d go from hating you and despising being in your presence, to wanting nothing more than to be in your presence, and your bed. You put your best dress on, best heels, best everything. Ready for Mason.
“There you are.” Your friend groaned, pulling you into a hug, and behind her was none other than: Declan, two more of your friend group, and Mason. You saw him wink at you, and you rolled your eyes, knowing this would be the longest night you’d have to endure Mason’s shit. “Why’d you take so long to get here?”
“Her carriage was far too slow.” Mason put on his best posh accent, earning a laugh from the rest of the group. You just glared at him and entered the club, hoping you didn’t see him for the rest of the evening. And you didn’t. But he saw you.
He watched you throughout the night, more to keep an eye on you if anything. In the taxi to the club, Declan and your friends were telling him all about your drunk alter ego. The second you’d had more than 5 shots, you were a different person. Bumping into people, falling over, climbing onto tables, kissing random men. The last one had Mason’s jaw clenching, but he ignored it and decided he’d keep watch. To make sure that nothing like that would be happening. He’d zone out of Declan’s conversation, watching as you moved your hips. The music had drowned out, the people around you becoming blurry messes, and it was only you.
His little bubble of Y/N had soon disappeared when he’d lost sight of you, immediately sending him into panic mode. He looked around at the faces that once surrounded you, trying to find yours. He’d gotten up from his seat at the bar, frantically walking around the dance floor to find you getting almost trampled on. You looked up at his concerned eyes, and Mason had lifted you up, carrying you outside of the club and round the corner, where it was a little less populated.
“What happened? Are you hurt?” He peppered you with questions, scanning your arms and legs for any damage. But you pushed him off. It was clear you were drunk, your eyes half closed and your balance completely gone. Even though you’d pushed him away from you, your arm was still tightly around him as you held yourself up.
“I’m fine.” You slurred, the world around you spinning as you clutched onto his shirt, “really I’m good.” It was a well-known thing that when drinking, once you get outside, it’s worse. It never really hits you until you leave the room. Mason searched around for a bench, but couldn’t find one. Instead, putting his jacket on the ground and helping you sit down.
“Thank you, Mase.” You smiled sweetly, a smile so sweet that he couldn’t help but smile too. “This is very nice of you, it’s the nicest you’ve ever been to me actually.” It burnt hearing that. Mason knew he came off as a dick to you, but he didn’t hate you. Not in the slightest.
“You’re welcome, princess.” He replied, keeping the dickish personality alive. It wasn’t him at all, he wanted to be sweet and intimate with you, but you didn’t want him. Or so he thought.
You tutted and picked your head up from his shoulder, your glare almost burning holes into his eyes. “I’m not your princess.”
Mason just laughed at you, pushing your head back onto his shoulder gently and keeping his arm around you. He was so protective of you tonight, and as much as he played around and was mean to you, he’d never let another person be that way to you. He knew he didn’t mean it, and deep down, you knew that too. “Yeah, yeah.” Mason shrugged off your remark, holding you closer to him.
“You’re lucky you’re super hot because I would not want to go on a date with someone as mean as you.” You mentioned, not even understanding what you were saying. It was as if you didn’t have a filter, you were just saying whatever was on your mind.
“I’m super hot, am I?” He questioned, a smirk on his lips as he looked down to you. You’d met his eyes and groaned, resting your head in your hands now. With utter shame coursing your veins.
“Oh God,” you whimpered, emotions getting the best of you, “now Mason knows I like him. This day sucks, I want to go home.” Mason was glad to be stone cold sober, as now he’d remember how you felt.
“Don’t worry,” he whispered back to you, lips dangerously close to your ear, “Mason likes you too.”
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enemies.
| bucky x reader | fluff |
requested by @fitzfiles enemies to lovers
this is technically a highschool au, but only slightly. we love bucky being a loveable ass out here
Your eyes narrowed and you glared at Bucky. You couldn’t stand him. Bucky was popular, flirtatious, and an asshole. He was always flirting with you at school, and you always felt like he was trying to make a joke of you in front of everyone. On top of that, it made other girls envy you, tainting friendships with jealousy.
It seemed like you were the only one who didn’t want Bucky Barnes.
“You’re such an ass!” You snapped at Bucky, who only laughed in response. You hated when he tilted his head to the side, the stupid smirk you loathed pulling at his lips.
“Don’t be like that, doll.”
“I’ll do whatever I want! Leave me alone, I’m not going to fall at your feet like everyone else!” You stood up from the library where he had been absolutely intent on distracting you from finishing your homework, the reason for the fight in the first place.
You were the only one who didn’t give him every ounce of attention he desired, and he was determined to get it.
You sat on your bed, a folder of history homework open in front of you. You studied with music softly in the background, needing a break from trying to study with Bucky bothering you every five seconds.
“Y/N,” your mom called your name as she walked in the door.
You looked up, setting down the document on World War II. Your father was behind her, and you grew uneasy, wondering what they possibly felt they needed to both talk to you about.
“We’re worried about you, dear.”
“Worried? Why?” you laughed, surprised by their explanation.
“We’re just concerned that you don’t have the same social life people your age have. You seem to always be up here, studying in your room. We want you to meet some people, and have some fun,” your father explained.
You were confused by the explanation. You spent most of your time at school, and around other students. You did have friends, but you also prioritized your grades. You certainly were not the hermit they were making you out to be.
“You don’t need to worry-”
“But darling, you’ve never dated. One of our friends has the most charming son, and we think he’d be perfect for you. We want to set you up.” Your mother was smiling, and you raised your eyebrows.
“Perfect for me?”
“Yes! He’s so charming, and he’s sweet. He’s also incredibly intelligent, his grades are wonderful. He travels a lot, you know, has that worldly kind of sense. And, he’s beautiful. We were thinking of setting the two of you up, having them over for dinner.”
You couldn’t deny that this sounded too good to be true. The boy they were describing sounded perfect for you, and although you cringed at the idea of your parents setting you up, you were intrigued.
“What is his name?”
“James!” She beamed, and you raised your eyebrows.
“I will go on one blind date with him, if you stop giving me a hard time about my social life.”
“One date. You can meet him at dinner tomorrow, and then the two of you must go on one date. If it doesn’t work out, it doesn’t work out. But try for us, honey.”
“I will, I promise,” you smiled at your parents, excited and nervous to meet your supposed dream-man.
You dressed up for dinner once you were home from school. You’d never even seen this boy, and yet your tummy was filling with excited butterflies. Your name was called from downstairs, and you quickly ran down to meet them.
You nearly tripped over yourself as you stopped dead in your tracks. You were met with an all-too-familiar silver gaze, and the smirk that made you so, so angry.
“Bucky.”
Your voice was cold, and all of the butterflies shriveled up and died, the excitement fading from you. You were furious that you’d agreed to go on a date with him in addition to sitting through this dinner.
“You two know each other?” His mother asked, surprised.
“Quite well, actually. We have history together at school, right doll?” Bucky was trying not to laugh, only fueling your irritation.
“It’s Y/N. And we’ve met, yes.”
This motherfucker.
Dinner was long and painful, and you were forced to listen to what a perfect prince everybody thought Bucky was. You were surprised to hear about his academic standing, one that competed with your own. It was clear by his expression that he didn’t want the news to get out that he wasn’t a complete anarchist.
You cringed as your parents praised you too, unsure of who they were trying to impress. You were quiet, not giving a single damn about being polite to the boy you hated.
“Why don’t the two of you go upstairs?” your mom suggested, and you sighed, holding back a massive eye roll. Being alone with Bucky was about last on the list of things you wanted to do.
You stood up under the pressure of four gazes, and Bucy followed you up the flight of stairs. He couldn’t contain his amusement for the situation, and you walked into your room and sat down on the edge of your bed, crossing your arms over your chest.
“Did you know it was me?”
“No, I really didn’t. But I’m glad it is.” He almost sounded sincere.
Bucky looked around your room, taking in the soft lavender walls, and the white bedspread that you sat on top of. Everything was soft and sweet, like you. Fairy lights hung above the bed, casting a gentle glow over the room. Bucky thought you looked beautiful.
“Quit staring at me,” you snipped, pulling your knees up to your chest.
He smiled, stepping in from the doorway and sitting beside you on the bed. You were angry at yourself for noticing the way the lights seemed to make him look golden, glinting in the reflection of huge silver eyes.
“How could I not?” He breathed, and your heart stuttered in your chest.
No. No, this is not happening. You will not let yourself be seduced by this cocky asshole.
“Save it for the date,” you rolled your eyes and he smirked.
“You’re not looking forward to it?” Bucky asked, and you shook your head with a face.
“No, of course not.”
“Come on, I’ll show you a good time. You’ll probably even realize that you’re in love with me.” His grin was infectious, but you fought off the urge to smile back.
“In love with you? Hardly.”
“I’ll give you one night. You’ll change your mind.”
“You seem confident,” you snarked, rolling your eyes at his arrogance.
“I always am.”
You watched him as his eyes traveled over the room, seeming to take everything in. Bucky noticed every small detail, including the sketch of daisies that leaned against the wall on top of your desk.
When he was finally called away, he stood in front of you, leaning over you with one hand on the wrought iron bed frame. A soft smile broke onto his face, and you felt warmth spread through your chest, reaching up to your cheeks.
“Goodnight, doll.”
You scowled at the dress that was laid out in the end of your bed when you got home from school. You’d been dreading the date, especially when Bucky winked at you during history class. He didn’t make a show of embarrassing you in front of his friends. You hadn’t even heard gossip about it, so he must not have told anybody.
You were a bit surprised, you thought that Bucky would seize the opportunity to be the subject of gossip and attention, dragging you into it with him.
Your parents were out of town for the weekend, and you’d been set up for a friday date after school with Bucky. The doorbell rang, and you went to answer it, your eyes widening a bit when you saw him in jeans and a button down.
Fuck, he was handsome.
“Hi James.”
“Y/N, you look beautiful,” he said honestly, and you couldn’t stop the warmth from blossoming on your cheeks. He held up a bouquet of daisies, and you bit back a smile, taking your favorite flowers from him. You realized he noticed the drawing, and something about that made you feel fuzzy inside.
It was too bad you didn’t even like him.
“Let me set these down, thank you.”
You put them in a vase on the table, and he followed you.
“You didn’t tell everyone at school.” It was a statement, but you meant it as a question.
“Why would I? I knew you wouldn’t appreciate everyone in your business,” Bucky confessed. Despite the amusement he gained from getting on your nerves, Bucky did like you, and he did respect you. The idea of others participate in the teasing, more than just his bit of playfulness, upset Bucky.
He wanted you to like him.
You followed Bucky outside to his yellow car, one that was sort of vintage. He didn’t drive to school, and you realized you had never seen his car, but it somehow fit him. You got in the passenger seat, and he handed you the chord to play your own music.
You nervously scrolled through your phone, deciding that the safest bet for music was bon iver, and he broke into a smile, leaning forward to turn up the stereo.
“I love this song,” Bucky grinned, surprising you.
“Where are we going?” you asked, leaning forward and watching the buildings pass by as he drove you to an unknown location.
“Just trust me.”
He parked and was opening your door for you before you could get out. You stepped out and took his outstretched hand, deciding you had to at least give this as much of an effort as he was.
His hand was soft and he squeezed you gently as he led you inside the huge aquarium in the city. It was your favorite place to go, and you wondered how Bucky knew that.
“You mentioned it once, in class,” he spoke as if he read your mind, or at least read the bright smile on your face.
“I can’t believe you remembered... Or that you even listened,” you laughed.
“I always listen.”
You walked through tunnels filled with colorful fish, and they swam around you on all sides, even under your feet. You gasped and pressed your hands to the glass, letting go of Bucky as you watched a sea turtle swim by. Bucky watched your delight, smiling at your excited squeal.
“Look!” you pointed, and he grinned.
“I see, it’s so cool,” he indulged you.
You moved through the tunnel, into a room of separate tanks, all smaller and holding their own creatures. You struggled to see the clown fish in the top, even standing on your toes.
“What’re you doing, doll?”
“Trying to see the nemo fish, but-” you squeaked as Bucky’s hands went around your waist, and he lifted you up so you could see. You blushed and smiled, looking at the fish swimming around. He gently set you down, and you wrapped your hands around his arm, a little bit shyly.
The two of you spent hours looking at the creatures, and you let him wrap his arms around your waist as you stood and watched the jellyfish.
“They’re so pretty!” you gasped, and Bucky could see the reflection in your wide eyes, and he couldn’t ignore how his heart raced when he looked at you.
You found yourself feeling the same way.
“This was great, James. I didn’t think you’d manage to win me over, but this is the best date I’ve ever been on,” you confessed shyly as you left, the sky already dark. He beamed at you, his silver eyes lighting up when you smiled at him.
“I’m so glad, but we’re not finished yet, doll.”
“You spoil me,” you giggled, and he pulled you to the car.
“Come on, or we’ll miss it,” he hurried you, laughing as he got behind the wheel.
He drove to a park and got a blanket from the backseat, producing a basket that you hadn’t noticed before.
“Picnicking in the dark?”
“Hush and come with me,” he insisted, laying out the blanket on the grass and pulling the food out.
You bit into a piece of fruit, leaning against his side. You gasped as fireworks started to go off overhead, and you looked at Bucky, who just smiled back at you.
“I thought you’d like them.”
You watched the light and colors explode in the sky, enjoying the dinner he brought. You ended up leaning back against Bucky’s chest, wrapped in his jacket when you complained of being chilly. You couldn’t believe that over the course of a few hours, he had managed to work his way into your heart, and you were now in his arms.
“Do you want to come in and stay?” you asked Bucky as he pulled up in front of your house.
“I’m invited?”
“Yes.”
He smiled, grabbing sweats from his trunk, explaining that he always had a change of clothes, on account of being an athlete. You teased him with a giggle, going inside with him and up to your bedroom.
You changed into a pajama set and laid on your bed with him, the two of you staring up at the tiny, glittering fairy lights above you.
“You look perfect like this,” you whispered.
“Not as perfect as you.”
“What happens Monday? Do you go back to being an ass and I go back to hating you?” your voice was soft, and although you were joking, the fear behind it was real.
“I was hoping I could call you my girlfriend on Monday.”
You leaned over and kissed him, answering the question. When he kissed you back, it was like a million tiny fireworks exploding inside of you, instead of in the sky overhead.
“You changed my mind in one night.”
#bucky#bucky barnes#james buchanan barnes#the winter soldier#winter soldier#winter soldier x reader fluff#bucky x reader#bucky x reader fluff#bucky x reader smut#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x reader fluff#bucky barnes x reader smut#bucky x you#bucky x y/n#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#the falcon and the winter soldier#falcon and the winter soldier#highschool au#bucky fluff#bucky barnes fluff#bucky imagine#fatws#tfatws#female reader#bucky barnes au
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crawl home to her, b.b. x reader
chapter three // didn’t care much how long i lived
summary: bucky receives a lesson on modern music over cheap beers and freshly baked scones.
warnings: mentions of abuse, food, alcohol consumption, character death (sorry)
word count: 1.6k
author’s note: besties...how we feeling about today’s episode??? using this as a coping mechanism :)
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Your record collection was extensive and collecting an unhealthy layer of dust since you had inherited them from your grandmother. It didn’t take long to fish out a Best Of album from the vast shelves, handing over the sleeve to Bucky, who sat patiently on your forest green couch, as you fiddled with the turntable’s needle.
To busy himself, he read over the repertoire of songs listed on the back.
“Let’s Get It On?”
“Usually, a guy buys a girl dinner first, Bucky.” You took a cheeky swig of your beer with an eyebrow raise as he flushed at the insinuation. “We’ll start easy. If I Could Build My Whole World Around You. A criminally under-appreciated love song.”
A bouncy beat crackled through from the speakers as you settled into the couch beside him, tucking your legs beneath you. Today’s choice of pajama bottoms displayed little snowflakes across a navy background, despite the heat outside that still lingered into nighttime.
“I like it.” Bucky decided.
“Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell have so many amazing songs together. She might not sound like it on record, but she had a hard life. Abusive, cheating partners. Brain cancer that killed her young. Hard to know what anyone’s going through behind closed doors.”
I’d put so much love where there is sorrow, I’d put joy where there’s never been before.
“I really like it.”
Your apron still hung from your waist, the gentle tick of the kitchen timer in the shape of a grey cat sat by your side. A reminder of the scones you were whipping up when Bucky unexpectedly appeared on your doorstep. You didn’t question him or bring up the late hour. Simply ushered him in with a smile and a beer shoved into his gloved hand.
Bucky feels comfortable for the first time in a long time. Eyes focused, mind stagnant. Your perfume, woodsy and natural, lingers in the air and he has to take a long gulp of his drink just to occupy himself for just a second.
“I’m glad you like it. Though, I don’t know if I’ve ever met someone who doesn’t like Marvin Gaye. It’s like not liking Queen.”
“Queen?”
The timer rattled on the coffee table and the smell of vanilla and blueberries nipped at Bucky’s nose.
“Saved by the bell! I don’t have the time to berate you on not knowing about Queen.”
You bustled your way back into the kitchen, sliding oven mitts onto your hands as you inspected the oven with a professional certainty. The record out and into the next track as Bucky watched on, your shoulders swaying to the slow tempo. You were light on your feet as you plucked one tray from the heat and replaced it with another.
It was so easy for Bucky to imagine this world as his, with the soft swing of Motown as the soundtrack to your shared afternoons. In a different life, he would come home to your baking, ask how studying went as you swayed in the kitchen together. You would wash dishes next to one another, hips pressed close, and giggle when he would press his sudsy hands onto your cheeks. You would smear remnants of cake batter on his and he would let you feed him dessert from your fingers.
It wasn’t possible, he knew. Probably ever. You would be graduating school soon, off to be an important attorney and he would still just be your across the hallway neighbor who you sometimes shared desserts and pleasantries with. You would find out who he was eventually. Everyone did. You would leave. Everyone did.
You would simply be another in a long line of failed attempts by James Buchanan Barnes.
Still, he thought, we can have this one simple night. Where you don’t know who he is, and he can imagine that it lasts long after he retreats back to his apartment.
‘Heaven must have sent you from above.’ Crooned the lovesick singers on your record player.
As you returned to the living room with another beer and the promise of scones as soon as they cooled, Bucky could only think one thing.
He was definitely starting to like Marvin Gaye.
He was starting to like you, too.
When he returned back to his apartment, hours later with a pile of records you insisted he borrow in his arms and a belly full of blueberry scones, he fell into bed without a care in his mind. It was his first full night of sleep in ninety years.
-
Bucky started appearing on your doorstep more often.
Your number was now saved in his phone and was his most frequently used contact. You were his secret, though, something he didn’t even share with Dr. Raynor. No matter how many times she tried to get him to speak about his troubling lack of acquaintances.
You were the one thing in the world untouched by all the destruction waging a war between his ears, you were easy and simple and God, it had been a long time since anything had been simple. You didn’t mind that he was brooding and a little bit clueless, or his cheesy jokes and complaints about technology these days.
His record collection was quickly growing, though it was still nowhere near yours.
Most of all, he liked sitting in your apartment, at your kitchen counter or on that forest green sofa of yours. Sometimes, you would let him pick a record and tell him everything you could remember about it. Other times, you would read from your heavy law books and he’d pretend to understand the cases and terminology, head resting against the back of your couch, admiring how your brows would furrow in concentration. He’d tell you not to hunch over your book, but you’d insist you were fine, only to be complaining about your neck the next time he saw you.
“I wish I read more actual books, you know? It seems like all I know these days are case studies.”
The next visit he’d have a worn copy of one of his favorite books tucked under his arm. He’d read to you until you’d doze off to the stories of Bilbo Baggins and his team of dwarves, a blanket tucked up to your neck.
Every visit cemented yourself further and further into his identity, until his trips to the used bookstore down the block became weekly and his morning runs became longer as you pushed more and more baked goods his way. You’d kiss his cheek as you said your goodbyes, leaning against your doorframe as he disappeared into his apartment.
He was happy. Positively, unbelievably happy.
-
Two days before Bucky’s next scheduled visit, Steve died in his sleep.
Pneumonia, or something, Bucky didn’t really comprehend any of the newscast beyond the headline ‘CAPTAIN AMERICA DEAD’ flashing in bold letters across his television screen.
Sam called early that morning and Bucky just knew. He knew what was waiting for him on the other end of that call, so he shut his phone off and laid back on the hardwood floor of his living room, dead to the world.
He didn’t speak to anyone for a few days, not even bothering with his daily runs or grocery store trips. Your knocks at his door went unanswered, with no trace that you had even stood in the hallway waiting for him other than a batch of oatmeal raisin cookies on his doormat. The only appointment he kept was his therapy, where he stared out the window and counted down the minutes until he could leave. Each attempt on Dr. Raynor’s part to bring up Steve was shut down as quickly as it was brought up.
Finally, a week later, a pounding at the door woke him from a restless afternoon nap.
“Buck, I know you’re in there.”
Sam. Of course.
“These boxes are heavy, come on!”
Sam Wilson took up Bucky’s entire doorway with his broad shoulders, the boxes stacked in his arms taking up the rest. Bucky was quick to usher him in the door, eyeing yours across the hall. He knew one look at an Avenger on his stoop would finally connect the dots for you, and you’d never speak to the Winter Soldier again.
“Keep your voice down.” Bucky shoved the final box through the doorway before securing the lock in place.
Sam surveyed his barren living room, eyes flicking to the crumpled bedsheets gathered on the floor next to his sofa but didn’t linger for long.
“I was worried about you, man.”
It used to be ‘we’, but now it’s just Sam.
“Nothing to worry about.” Bucky pushed past him to his kitchen, collecting stray dishes he hadn’t bothered to move to the sink before then. He felt Sam’s careful gaze on him the entire time. He hated that. He hated how much Sam cared.
He mostly hated how much it reminded him of Steve.
“Found these boxes in Steve’s attic. Had your name on them so I thought you might want ‘em.”
Bucky swallowed hard, focused on scrubbing the dishes under water so hot it was turning the skin on his flesh hand a violent red.
“I know this is hard, Buck-”
The glass he had been rinsing shattered between his fingers and Sam took a step back as Bucky heaved in uneven breaths. There was a long silence between the two grieving men, neither able to fully understand the other. Sam would never feel Bucky’s ninety-year heartache, the abandonment and fear of the life ahead of him. Bucky would never understand the weight on Sam’s shoulders or his unease at the shield tucked under his bed at home.
“I just want to be alone.”
Sam could do nothing but respect his wish.
“Call if you need anything.” Were his departing words as he showed himself out.
Bucky got to work cleaning up the broken glass.
taglist: @tisthedamninez @wcndamaxcmoff @freyagallileaevans @bibliophilewednesday @justtoreblogfics @teti-menchon0604 @l-adysansa @heart-eyes-horan @thiswasnevermylifefromtony @rexorangecouny @dilfvision @urafakebetch @comphersjost @am-tired-bois @spid3rgwen @beautyandthebleh @euphoricaaaa @mackycat11 @inadquacy @withyoutilltheendofthismess @motherofallthesmallthings @victoriabaker112213 @macrillez @stvalentiness @nova10711
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Glimpses: Part 14a (Kathryn Hahn x Fem!Reader)
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Part 1 // previous chapter <<< >>> next chapter
Summary: The cast goes out for dinner.
Word Count: 1.7k
A/N: Well hello there again! I was scheduled for work today but my shift got cancelled, so I had some time to go on with the story. Today's story doesn't begin with a gif - but it ends with one. Additionally, I am very anxious for everyone's reaction. Please don't kill me. xxx A.
Tag List: @danvers97 @zafirosreverie @srtamercurio @wanatag @pulledbythestars17 @plantowl @spacehahn @sarahp-stan @agentbrownierso @our-blood-is-our-ink
Playlist! :)
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On set has always been Kathryn’s favorite place to be. Ever since she can think, she wanted to be an actress. It’s overwhelming sometimes, that’s for sure. But watching the movies at the end, after the projects are done, is the most rewarding thing to her.
It’s Wednesday afternoon, today was a short day because the director scheduled some night shootings at the beginning of the week and promised to give everyone off earlier on Wednesday so the cast could go out for dinner. That’s why Kathryn is sitting in her Trailer with manager Jennifer and assistant Agnes (Ben is already off for the day) as they enjoy a cup of coffee as they chat about the upcoming weeks.
Kathryn is sprawled out on the couch, propping her feet up on Jennifer’s lap who doesn’t mind to have a little less personal space. Jennifer is studying the week’s schedule on her iPad as Kathryn stares at the ceiling.
“Do you know what you want to wear to dinner today?” Kathryn props her head up to look at Jennifer and tries to find a quick answer.
She hates questions about outfits because usually she just throws on a blazer to whatever shirt she is wearing that day and calls is a day. As if anyone cares what she is wearing. Also, with no social media she wouldn’t notice bad press anyway.
Realizing Kathryn hasn’t thought of it yet, Agnes gets up and walks towards her wardrobe. Kathryn’s eyes follow her.
“Thank you, Aggie, just a black blazer would be great. Did I bring one? I’ll just wear it with the shirt I’m wearing. No fuzz and all.” Kathryn says apologetically. She feels bad for not getting up and arranging her clothes herself, but she is completely exhausted and can’t find the strength to get up just yet.
The three woman chat for a little longer before Kathryn sits down to reapply her makeup and fix her hair. There’s a knock on the door. Once again, Agnes is the one who gets up to open it as Jennifer is on a call with a magazine who wants to interview Kathryn soon.
“Hello! Can I he-“ The redhead nearly falls out of the trailer as she is faced with one of Kathryn’s co stars. The actor smiles at her softly, offering a hand to steady her.
“Is Kathryn here?” He asks in a raspy, low voice and peeks his head into the trailer. Kathryn, who has turned around from where she is seated, makes eye contact with him and offers a slow wave to say hello.
“K! We’re slowly but surely getting ready to leave and I thought I’d give you a heads up and maybe even take you with me already.” Hearing this nickname from anyone but you makes Kathryn feel very uneasy and her whole inside flinches as she realizes that, if she doesn’t speak up about it, he will continue using it. But at the same time: what is she supposed to say? She can’t just call him out for something like that because that could make her seem extremely unfriendly right away.
Realizing an answer is long overdue, she nods and checks herself in the mirror. “Can I get… like 10 more minutes, Jeff? I’ll come find you immediately.”
He shoots her a bright smile “Don’t worry! Let’s make it 15 and I’ll pick you up again.” And with that he leaves the trailer again.
Jennifer, who ended the call just a moment ago, looks up from the tablet to grin at Kathryn. “What a gentleman.” She winks.
“Treating you just the way you deserve to be treated.” Agnes also winks at her and Kathryn wishes she could just slap both of them. Lovingly, obviously.
Jennifer gets her attention back. “So…. Are you gonna go with him?”
“IS IT GONNA BE A DATE?” The younger woman jumps in excitedly.
Kathryn turns around to actually face her two closest people again without a mirror being the transmitting point. “Guys, you know I’ve been spending time with Y/N. That would be extremely unfair to her. I couldn’t.”
Agnes starts nodding as Jennifer takes her attention off the tablet for a moment and fully faces Kathryn. “I know, but let’s face it. She is much younger than you, doesn’t know a thing about the business and she won’t be here for a long long time. And of she would be here then press would go absolutely wild and you know that!”
“But… she makes me happy.” Kathryn won’t let her manager talk for herself and over her feelings like that and smiles as she sees her assistant nod behind Jennifer’s back over the remark.
“Might be, but still. My point stands. As your manager I have to tell you that both could be an extreme distraction, but at least he is here and you don’t have to stay up extremely late to communicate.” Jennifer looks back at her tablet, where she furiously starts typing. “Also. He has a very clean record and seems genuinely nice.”
“Let’s put on the red lipstick you brought, Kathryn! I’ll help you.” Agnes smiles and gets up from where she is seated to step closer to Kathryn, pushing her red hair behind her ears.
As they look at each other in the mirror and Kathryn’s eyes meet hers, she realizes how emotional her boss seems to be over the whole situation. Realizing Agnes is about to make another remark, Kathryn slightly shakes her head as she keeps intense eye contact and reaches for the lipstick to distract herself.
Just a moment later, Jeffrey knocks on the door again.
“There she is!” He exclaims, reaching for Kathryn’s hand who is about to step out of the trailer. “The most beautiful woman on set.”
She blushes and slaps his arm that is intertwined with hers all while jokingly rolling her eyes. “Oh shush.” She laughs.
“Just spilling some facts. Let’s go, I’ll drive. The others left just a moment ago and I offered to bring you.”
It’s a short drive and the two hold a casual conversation about previous projects and the mood is good. He seems to actually be quiet the gentleman as he immediately walks around the car and opens the door for her to get out. It’s just now becomes clear that it wasn’t a smart idea to leave later than the others.
Word must have spread and paparazzi and a handful of fans are building a crowd in front of the restaurant. For aesthetic reasons, the restaurant’s entrance is made out to look like a red carpet - the perfect opportunity to shoot some pictures of the stars.
The whole cast is still outside, waiting for Jeff and Kathryn all while handing out autographs. Paparazzi line up to get the perfect shot of the whole cast. Someone from the restaurant seems to be outside already to organize and manage the situation and give the cast some space. He talks the paparazzi down to take a single picture of all of them together.
Kathryn gets seemingly uneasy. She never really does a lot of big press for her projects and events like the Grammys are so organized that she doesn’t get to experience chaos like this, especially with no security around. Jeffrey turns around to look at her. “Hold on to me, we’ll be inside in a minute.”
She smiles thankfully and intertwines their arms again on their way inside. As they are all stopped for the cast picture, the fans line up with the paparazzi to get some pictures themselves. There is a moment of silence as the hotel manager arranges everyone and clears the chaos. A random girl in the back of the people suddenly jumps up and, thereby, grabs everyone’s attention. “I LOVE YOU, KATHRYN.” She jumps again. “YOU’RE SO BEAUTIFUL, KATHRYN.” She yells, prompting Kathryn to break out into the most beautiful smile, a sight that doesn’t go unnoticed by Jeffrey who smiles back at her, creating a moment that is captured by a fan’s phone.
Dinner itself is calming and everyone has a good time. Kathryn loves to get to know everyone this way and they stay for multiple hours until the sun has long set and it seems like everyone is on their third desert, just to drag out the time.
Slightly intoxicated from all the wine she has had with the female co star next to her, Kathryn smiles at Jeffrey. “Thank you for offering a ride, by the way. I feel like I haven���t said that yet.”
“You are very welcome.” He replies and places his hand on her upper thigh for a moment as the two of them look at each other for a little too long.
“Kathryn! Another glass?” She actress next to Kathryn grabs her attention as the waiter offers to pour another one. Overthinking for a moment, Kathryn ends up declining the glass and asks for a water instead. She doesn’t want to be hungover tomorrow.
As it nears midnight, the cast slowly but surely makes their way back home and Jeff reaches out for Kathryn once again to help her up from the table. Just like before, he offers her a right back home to the hotel that she is staying in over night. They realize they are living on the same floor as they make their way back to her room.
Kathryn, who’s red lipstick has already worn off from all the food and drinks she’s had, stumbles slightly. Not because she is drunk, but because of how tired she feels. There are no words to describe how glad she is that she doesn’t have to work early the next morning. Her first shoot isn’t until 3pm, so she will definitely be sleeping in.
Jeffrey guides her all the way to her room and watches her as she let’s herself in. He stays in the door frame, leaning against it as his eyes follow her every step. Kathryn takes off her blazer and ruffles through her hair after putting her jewelry on a plate on her table.
In her background, Jeffrey, who is still standing where she left him, clears his throat. “Come and spend the night with me.”
#kathryn hahn#kathryn hahn x reader#Kathryn Hahn x You#Kathryn Hahn fan fiction#Kathryn Hahn Fanfiction#groupie#groupie au
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For One More Hour or One More Day
Dukeceit Week Day 6: Horror/Comedy
Remus and Janus work in IT, and Remus never fails to make Janus' life a bit more exciting than it should be. Janus wouldn't have it any other way.
AO3 Link: [here]
Word Count: 1416
Warnings: swearing, typical Remus-levels of implied sexual content.
@dukeceitweek <3
-
[06032021 Network Node Down- 172.12.203.1 - Dee Why ]
Janus stared at the next ticket in his queue. He didn't even have to look at which tech wrote it. He just knew. He picked up his phone and dialed.
“'Sup, DeeDee?"
"Because they use ancient technology and refuse to upgrade, that's why."
There was a beat of silence on the line. Janus didn't need to see him to know Remus was grinning like a maniac.
“Oh, JD, I haven't the faintest idea what you're talking about," Remus said finally. His voice was laced with barely-contained glee.
“Uh-huh, sure," Janus replied dryly. He watched on his screen as an incoming call diverted from his in-use line. "Do you want to clarify for me, in excruciating detail, what, exactly, it is that broke this time? After all, if it's something I can fix from here, it would save the company an awful lot of money. And you know how I love saving this company money."
“You don't feel like taking work calls either, huh?"
“Ree, I haven't the faintest idea what you're talking about."
-
[06142021 CRITICAL | Device failed Availability and Latency checks - Dispatch Requested]
Janus sat in his truck for a few minutes, cross-checking the address across his e-mail, Slack, and the ticket itself. And yeah, they all matched. This wasn’t a repeat of that time Remus had changed the address on the ticket from 96th St. to 69th St. as a joke.
(Janus had almost gotten mugged. He was still a little salty about that one.)
But this time, all the addresses matched. The problem was, he was parked in front of a restaurant instead of the usual office building, and that just didn’t seem right. He opened up Slack on his phone.
Janus D’lyre: Are you sure the address is right?
Remus Rey: Yeah, it’s right.
Janus D’lyre: It’s a restaurant.
Remus Rey: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Janus D’lyre: Are you positive it’s right?
Remus Rey: I just write the tickets, Dee, I don’t do a background check. Just go in.
Janus sighed. He got out of his truck, hefted his tech bag over his shoulder, and went inside.
It was a nice restaurant. Very fancy, with a goddamn chandelier hanging over the front lobby. Field engineers weren’t required to dress in a suit and tie, but Janus did by habit- and he was glad he did, because he would feel like a horrible slob standing here in jeans and a polo.
“Can I help you?”
Janus looked over to the host, standing at the counter with a bright smile that only looked 52% faked.
“Yes,” Janus answered. “I’m here about the network issues?”
“Oh!” The host- his name tag read ‘Patton’- brightened up a bit. “Yeah! Remus is waiting for you, this way!”
“Remus is what?”
It was too late. Patton had already darted around the counter and off into the dining area. Janus sighed and, regretting every life choice leading up to this exact moment, followed.
Sure enough, Remus was waiting for him. Patton led him to a quieter area of the restaurant, where Remus was sitting at a table. Well, sitting was a generous way to phrase it, because in reality, he was tipped back on the rear two legs of the chair, combat boot-clad feet up on the table. He jumped up eagerly at the sight of Janus, and somehow managed not to fall backwards and crack his skull open.
“Hey! You made it! Thanks, Pat!”
“No problemo!” the host replied with a grin before heading back to the front counter. Janus briefly considered that he might be having a fever dream right now.
“Remus, what the fuck?”
“Told you it was the right address!”
Janus glared. “That is not what I’m ‘what the fuck’-ing you about.”
“I mean, I’d prefer me fucking you-”
“Remus.”
“Well, you work so hard, DeeDee,” Remus said calmly, as if he wasn’t standing in the middle of the fanciest restaurant on this side of town, dressed in his usual tank-top and leather vest combo and probably mashing dirt into the plush red carpet, and definitely doing something that should get him fired. “I thought you could take a break, and we could have a nice dinner.”
No, he wasn’t doing something that should get him fired. He was doing something that should get them both fired.
“You’re joking, right?”
“Kinda a lame joke.”
“Remus, you had me dispatched to a random address for a fake problem, to have dinner with you on company time?”
“‘Course not, who do you think I am?”
Janus did not dignify that with an answer. He turned to walk away.
“Jannie, wait!” Remus darted around the table to get in front of him. Janus stopped, and glared. “This is Roman’s restaurant! It’s not a random address, he’s an actual client.”
Janus’ glare lessened. Ok, sure, they did have some smaller commercial clients. And sure, Remus had mentioned his brother’s restaurant was using them as tech support now after a bad experience with a different company. But- “It’s still a fake problem, Remus.”
A shit-eating grin spread across Remus’ face. “Nah. I unplugged the router.”
Janus snorted in a totally dignified manner. “You didn’t.”
“I did.”
“...Well, I suppose… I’d better investigate the issue. Couldn’t be solved remotely, hardware problem and all.”
Remus held out a hand. Janus took it, and let Remus lead him back to the table.
“Great, cause I already ordered!”
-
[06192021 Switch is problematic. Unable to get into the switch || Serial No. 111-0203-2018]
Janus very calmly cleared the ticket, set his work phone to away, pulled out his personal phone, and sent Remus a text.
Jannie-D: I know you’re upset I didn’t let you fuck me last night. Get over it.
Remster: i will not
-
Virgil Caligo: yo are u and remus like good?
Janus D’lyre: We had a small argument last night. Why?
Virgil Caligo: [image attached]
Janus sighed. Virgil had sent him a screenshot of a ticket update Remus had just posted.
[06292021 Ticket #00679 Update.] ‘The device is not only unresponsive to simple ping requests, but is being kind of a jerk about it. 100% package loss, a tragedy. Device was confirmed to be connected to a working power source, but they all say that, so who can really be sure. Dispatch requested, please confirm maintenance window. Actually showing up would be great, too.’
Janus hastily typed a message to Virgil.
Janus D’lyre: Did you take that one?
Virgil Caligo: ya. logan didnt see dw
Janus D’lyre: Thanks. You can transfer it to me, I’ll take care of it.
Janus leaned back in his chair and rubbed his temples. What a comedy of errors this day had been. It was the last time he’d forget he and Remus had a date night planned, that’s for sure.
-
Remus sighed when a priority ticket popped up in his queue. He was having a grand time ignoring his other queues in favor of sculpting a rather elaborate dick out of the green Play-Doh he kept at his desk, but he really did not feel like getting bitched out by Logan for missing a priority ticket. Grumbling to himself, he stuffed the Play-Doh back into its tub and opened the ticket.
[06292021 Ticket #00679 Update.] ‘Likely a hardware bug. Possible remote fix with reset and reconfigure. Device information missing from online records. Please check file and update record.’
Fuck. Remus hated pulling files. What a pain. He trudged his way upstairs to the records room, which was always dark and depressing because nobody ever went there because who the fuck used physical paper in 2021?
But when he unlocked the door and pushed it open, the light was on. And every surface was covered in flowers.
“What the fuck?” Remus asked the flowers. They didn’t answer. But, at the small desk near the door, there was a stack of green boxes from his favorite bakery- and on top of that, he saw an envelope with his name on it. Eagerly, Remus tore open the envelope.
Inside, he found a single sheet of Janus’ fancy stationery paper, the kind with the little holographic snakes along the edge that he only ever used for special occasions. And on that paper, one single sentence, penned in Janus’ elegant, flourishy handwriting: Ok, you can fuck me tonight.
- - -
[06292021 Ticket #00679 Update.] ‘I take it back, the device is no longer being a jerk, and I love the device very much.’
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Surprise Hit
On a con Eliot is recognized by someone who has a hit on him and has to run.
On AO3.
Ships: none
Warnings: mentions of some mafia dealings
~~~~~~~~~~~
The con went to shit.
This happened often enough with a mark not making the expected choice, a firewall taking longer to crack than anticipated or someone showing up that was not supposed to. It was normal, however the way it went to shit this time was unique. “Nate, I got a problem,” Eliot announced.
“What is it?” Nate asked over the coms. It was an integral part of the plan that Eliot talked to their mark, John Fernsby, and convinced him to meet with Sophie. Nate would have done it, but he had already been the one to go in and convince the billionaire that thebusiness was worth investing in and Hardison was needed to help Parker into the safe. It had to be Eliot.
But Eliot said there was a problem, which was bad. However, it was about to get worse when Eliot answered: “He’s talking with a foreign dignitary, but I know he isn’t. That’s Mikhail Volkov, Russian mob. He has a hit out on me.”
“The fuck, man,” Hardison replied.
“I didn’t pick it either, okay,” Eliot hissed back. “But if he sees me, we’re fucked. Well, I’m fucked and someone has to take my part in the con.”
Hardison had pulled up the camera feed of the gala and watched how Eliot turned away from the mark and tried to leave them room without pulling any attention to himself. He almost managed too, were it not for a serenade band coming in right as he was near the exit.
It was such a stupid little thing that they couldn't have predicted and it was so incredibly ill-timed that Eliot had no room to come up with something. Mikhail turned to the band and saw Eliot, his brow furrowed and he yelled: “Stop that man!” as Eliot started to sprint, multiple people now on his trail.
He pushed over furniture behind him and swerved while a few bullets started to fly around his head, dangerously close. In his ear Hardison was giving him directions to Lucille, but he knew he could not return to the team. Not right now.
The Russian mob was not known for their leniency and if they thought he had people he worked with, then they would only target them as well. No, he had to go into hiding on his own and return to them later, when he could shake off his pursuers. In his ear he heard Hardison rant at him as he took the wrong turn, but Eliot didn’t care. He had a plan.
On the street it was easier to disappear, though he got many looks from people as they cleared the way for him while he ran like a madman. There were a few screams when the Russians appeared behind him with guns.
If it were a normal day and he was on his own, he would have stayed to fight them, but he was wearing a suit he couldn't easily fight in and Sophie and Parker had still been in the building, he couldn't risk them for something stupid he’d done in the past. And when he was outside, he didn’t have the surprise advantage or the closeness to take on that many guys with guns.
So, he ran.
His lungs were burning in his chest and his legs would be jelly were it not for the fact that he regularly ran long tracks in case he got in this exact situation.
It took a while, but the bullets stopped flying around his head and he couldn't hear any footsteps behind him anymore. He took a moment to focus on the chatter over the coms. His brain hadn’t heardany of the key words to get his attention in the background, so he assumed it was all fine.
“Eliot, Eliot, are you listening to me?” That was Nate.
“I’m here,” he grunted, checking in the alley if there was anyone still following, before starting to climb the fire escape.
“What are you doing? Hardison’s GPS says you’re nowhere near the hotel. We need to regroup and figure out our next move,” Nate said as Sophie asked: “Are you okay, Eliot?”
He replied: “I’m fine, Sophie. Just didn’t want to lead a group of armed mobster to our hotel room when their goal is to kill me and all my associates.”
“They’re coming to kill us?” Hardison’s squeaky voice came through the speaker.
“Not if they don’t know I’m with you,” Eliot assured him, “which is why I’m not at the hotel right now. I think I’ve shaken them off, but just in case I’m taking a long way round. Probably won’t come through the doors.”
Thenhe tuned them out again. It might be rude and he heard they were still asking him all sorts of questions, but he wasn’t in the mood to answer. He had other things to focus on and the last thing he wanted was to tell them why there was a hit on his head from this particular mobster.
Going through the city over the roof, he saw a few familiar stances and haircuts stationed at public places where he would hide, as well as at the hotels and he knew he had made the right decision to take this route.
Mentally he was trying to figure out why Mikhail was here of all places talking with their mark. It could be that he was laundering money and their mark having a connection with the mob could both help and be an issue. He could get into witness protection in turn for information, but it was also proof that his business wasn’t clean, even if they had wanted to get him for the stealing of company funds that screwed over his employees’ safety.
But that was not his business to think about, but Nate’s. He would wait for what the man had to say about this development, but in order to do that, he needed to get back to the hotel.
There were also “guards” at the entrance of their hotel, but the team was only on the fourth floor and while they weren’t close to the fire escape, Eliot could get up high and then go side wards over the ridge to their window.
He gave Hardison a heart attack when he got at the window. They hadn’t left it open, much to his chagrin, but were luckily there to open it for him and it was better not to have a weakness in the defense, so he couldn't blame them.
“What the hell, man,” Hardison said. “Give someone a warning before you go around showing up in front of the window. Did you even have safety or something? We’re up high. You could have fallen to your death, Eliot.”
“Yeah and if I had gone through the front door, I would have been shot,” he pointed out tiredly from where he was lying on the floor.
Parker was looking out the window and smiled: “Oeh, that’s a good climbing ridge indeed.”
“Woman!” Hardison exclaimed, while Eliot said: “We could do without the attention to our room, Parker, maybe next time.” She looked sad and glanced over one more time, before closing the window with a pout.
“Care to explain what happened?” Nate asked as he leaned over him. He did that face where he attempted innocence, but failed.
“Got recognized by someone who’s sort of actively trying to kill me,” Eliot replied with what they already knew.
“Sort of actively?” Sophie asked and Eliot was glad he could explain something not that bad to them instead of the other stuff. “Yeah, there’s a difference between saying, ‘hey if you manage to kill this person and prove it you get money,’ and ‘I am hiring you to kill this person within a time frame.’ Mikhail is the former. If I die, he would be happy, but he’s not putting extra resources in finding me and eliminating me.”
“And why would be be happy if you’re dead?” Fucking Nate always sticking his nose everywhere.
“I met him once,” Eliot wasn’t giving him shit.
“Would I be correct in assuming that the meeting ended in a loss on his end?” Nate replied.
“Maybe.” He was neither confirming or denying, not if there was no explicit reason. He hadn’t felt bad about the blow to Mikhail’s organization. It hadn’t been the worst he’d done and Mikhail had a smuggling ring of sex workers and that had been awful to find.
“Okay, so we know Fernsby has connections to the Russian mob,” Nate thought out loud. “So, he’s not only stealing money from his employees, but laundering dirty money as well. If we can tie those together then we’re set.”
“Mikhail has a weakness for brunettes,” Eliot informed him, not telling him how he got that tidbit of knowledge. “He also likes gambling.”
Nate got a glint in his eye as he looked to Sophie, who smiled back. Of course those two would have a plan without needing to communicate.
“You’re out for the rest of the con,” Nate told him. “Can’t have you risk the entire thing if you’re recognized.”
“What? No!” Eliot sat up. “I need to be there to have your back. With the Russians it’s only going to get more dangerous. I’m not leaving you to your fate with those people, they’re dangerous, Nate. This isn’t just some cushy billionaire anymore.”
“And what if he gets suspicious of Sophie because of you, what will you do then, Eliot?” Nate shot back. “I’m not saying you need to stay here, but I am saying you need to keep out of sight. You’re with Hardison in Lucille.”
Eliot wanted to protest, wanted to be closer to the danger in case it went to shit, he wanted to be there when a mistake from his past came back, but he couldn't argue with Nate’s logic and sometimes he hated that about the man.
So, he found himself watching the screens in Lucille as Sophie tried to get Mikhail to make a gamble on her company, to ditch Fernsby, because he was doing it without him and leaving him out of the profits.
He was filled with jittery energy, but so far so good.
“Hey, Eliot,” Hardison opened. “What’s it like, you know, to have a hit on your head? I mean, I’m wanted in some countries, but that’s just boring government stuff, not actual people, like persons, wanting me dead personally, you know.”
“Are you really asking me what it’s like when someone wants you killed?” Eliot asked him.
“I guess,” Hardison shrugged, trying not to look like he wanted to know the answer and failing miserably.
“It’s not that different from being wanted by the government, I suppose,” Eliot finally answered, surprising Hardison. “You just gotta watch out for different things and hope no one is desperate enough for cash to go after you. I have a good enough reputation that hardly anyone tries, but I’ve had periods where I had multiple people on my trail across a dozen countries. It was exhausting, but I get it. Kill me and you can make a lot of people with a lot of money happy.”
“Wait, hold on, reverse and repeat,” Hardison said. “A lot of people?”
“Yeah,” Eliot replied, didn’t Hardison know this? “I got more than one hit on my head. I think it’s five. Used to be six, but one of them died and the bounty fell through. Though I never knew if that one English guy put one on my head as well. And of course, the countries, but those are always lazy about it, so I don’t worrry too much about those.”
“What the fuck, man.”
Eliot didn’t see the big deal. He had done a lot to deserve it and he had learned to live with it. He hadalways kept one eye open anyway.
He focused back on the screen, despite the hiccup earlier with him, the con ran smoothly on its new course and Sophie was phenomenal as he pitted the two guys against one another, making them sell each other out in the end.
Nate was there with the police and both were arrested with illegal cash on their hands and a lot of bank records detailing their dirty schemes as well as showing the abysmal circumstances of the workers that had gone unaddressed in favor of laundering money.
Later when they were sitting in the bar, Nate turned to him and asked: “Any more of that we should be worried about?”
Before Eliot could answer, Hardison had jumped in: “Apparently between five and six more times.”
“No, between four and five,” Eliot corrected. “Mikhail is no longer on the list, but honestly we couldn't have predicted this and there are too many bad guys I’ve known, double crossed, worked for or left that are still out there. We can’t account for all of them. I’ll try to be aware of which marks could have ties to other’s I’ve known, but you don’t get to be good in my line of work without enemies.”
Nate wanted to say something else, but Sophie was quicker. “I’m not keeping track of all the people I have grifted either, Nate,” she said. “We all have a past and you’re not harping me about that or Parker on all she’s stolen. Just because Eliot’s past is a bit different, doesn’t mean we can treat it differently in our team.”
Eliot didn’t fully agree with the comparison. His enemies we’re not the same and one of them coming back would be worse than it was for others.
Still, he couldn't bring himself to disagree with her. Not right now.
He thought of all the people he killed, all the families he’d left behind with one member less. He thought of Moreau and the horrible things he’d done for that man. He thought of the US Army that had turned him into a killer and set him loose on foreign soil for the first time.
And he thought of his team. Of how glad he was he knew them and how they made him better and didn’t force him to be a person he hated. How much they meant to him and how badly he didn’t want to loose that.
So he stayed quiet and let Sophie defend him, hoping his past would not come back like that again.
~~
A/N:
Sorry that the con is kinda vague, I only had the ‘the mark/someone there has a hit on Eliot and he needs to run’ and no clear plan on running the con in the background. Hope it was still enjoyable :D
#RR writing#leverage#leverage tv#eliot spencer#nate ford#sophie devereaux#parker#leverage parker#alec hardison
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Discussing the good and bad of Pokémon Journeys: Part “Rocket Gang”
It is no secret that the handling of Rocket Gang in Journeys is quite different from how the fans and audience have come to know them. Even I have tons to say about how I feel about Rockets in this series, so let's get started!
TLDR; Their handling in this series isn't exactly the best kind as it has removed one of the beloved aspects of them (having own Pokémon they bond very closely with) and is showing less often how they are RIGHTEUS evil, not evil evil. More under the cut, Journeys abverted to JN.
So. How do I begin. Let's start with saying: I am a Rocket Fan. A huge one. Ever since I started watching Pokémon couple years ago during Sun & Moon's first year, I fell in love with these buffoons, and I absolutely adored how the two bonded with their Pokémon and showcased that they're not that different from the brats, just on the villainnous side. Kojiro is a loving and caring man, Musashi has gone through lots of stuff and Nyarth has deep understanding over Pokémon's feelings due to his past experiences. Oh, Sonansu's there too, I love that blue blop so much. Honestly, the main reason I love these four so much is because they're such lovable villains who tend know what is right for their Pokémon, or other Pokémon they manage to bond with. And it was shown really well pre-SM as well.
Like, one of my favourite episodes of all time for Rockets is actually JN019, and it's because of how the Rockets end up helping a Ditto/Metamon who wants to be a proper actor, but thus far tended to fail in transforming into Pokémon perfectly. Musashi, as a actress herself, really bonds with this Metamon, managed to help it perfect the transformation with the help of Kojiro, Nyarth and Sonansu, and despite having the job to pokenap Pokémon... they actually end up helping Metamon to get back its job, to make sure it doesn't have a reputation of a Rocket 'mon. And they do SUCH a good job at acting like they're not intending it.
Like, during this acting performance, they really want to get blasted off! They don't even hide it. They keep provoking Satoshi to use Pikachu's Thunderbolt to blast them off and save Metamon that way. And I just fricking love them for this asjhgsjhgfs.
But aside from this episode, there really hasn't been that many episodes focusing on this aspect of Rockets. Another good episode for them JN is JN024 thou, where Rockets are on vacation and, are NOT on their villainous acts.
They're mere citizens in that episode, enjoying their free time in Sinnoh's Resort Area. And even when the brats come around, they fully ignore their need to capture Pikachu. For Sakaki-sama's orders. Akjhksajfh I just, really love how this ep managed to show that, even if they are part of Rocket Gang, it's merely their job, not who they are fully. They're not like Matori, they're not like Yamato and Kosanji- oh it's Kosaburo. They're merely doing the villainous stuff because they believe it to help make the world better. And when they're not working? They're good citizens. This was such a good episode for them because of this because it really showed that they could easily just be friends with the brats if they weren't on the opposite sides.
They even helped foil Matori's team's plans on kidnapping every single Pokémon in the Resort Area and sajghsjhgf. These four really hate Matori now do they. They're on her side, but they also keep foiling her plans. Even in Sun & Moon they foiled Matori's plans to pokenap Nuikoguma, because they knew their lovely Kiteruguma mom bear would be upset. As I said before: They're villains, but they're not evil evil. They do the evil stuff for their own rightful reasons.
Now that I've discussed the reasons I love Rockets and what I've loved in JN, let's talk about what it is that makes me feel iffy about their handling in JN, one of them being the lack of own permament poketeam.
In the past seasons, Rockets would always catch themselves one of their own 'mon that would willingly join their causes, and end up bonding with them deeply. In JN, this is... pretty much non-existant. We have the recurring 'mon of Kamukame/Chewtle and Morpeko, but the first one appears in such a rare rate, and latter one has been used as a... abuse comedy. When the Morpeko started following Rockets, I had hoped that it would end up bonding with the Rockets and they'd find some common ground, but so far, there's no sign of it, and Morpeko is more like a leech in their base instead of a powerful asset, and like. I feel like this was the show's way of trying to recreate Kiteruguma but with an opposite twist of it eating their rations instead of feeding them like Kiteruguma did, but it's not working as well as Mama Bear's gimmick did. At least in my opinion.
Now let me just say that, I don't really mind the Rocket Gacha machine. I feel like the concept it has is pretty cool, and seeing what kind of Pokémon Rocket Gang has managed to capture for using is super cool to witness. They also have been able to switch up it's results in unique and fun ways and seeing it sometimes fail is kinda fun and relatable to anyone who's played gacha games, sajhgfs. However, it feels like the Gacha completely replaced Rocket Quatret's ability to capture Pokémon of their own and, it hurts my soul to say it.
I think one of the reasons they did this route was due to how in Sun & Moon, Musashi and Kojiro ended up leaving their 'mon behind, due to knowing that they won't like it at the Rocket Head Quarters and leaving the cozy family that is Kiteruguma and Nuikoguma. So, maybe the writers felt like the Quatret would now feel bad about capturing 'mon they would bond closely with after this, and then ending up having to send them to HQ. So in a way, I get the possible intention behind this decision. Yet it still hurts. And I feel like most Rocket Fans feel the same way.
Their writing is pretty much the same throughout the show (which imo is kind of an average, as it doesn't hit the nail the same way I came to love them in Sun & Moon or OS to DP era, or even XY and Best Wishes DA! Arc), so it doesn't make sense for me to recite every single appearance of theirs, but I really have to discuss what irritated me a lot:
So. JN059.
I'll just say it straight away: I did not like how Rockets were written in this episode. At all. While their personality was spot on, their motives and actions weren't. Like... the fact that Grookey/Sarunori was a Rocket 'mon is a unique concept and I honestly like it. However, the way Sarunori ended up switching sides was so bad for me. So bad.
No. I am not one of those who think that Gou stole Sarunori from them and doesn't deserve it. No. That ain't my problem. It's more like the issue in how Rockets weren't allowed to learn more about Sarunori, bond with it, learn that it's not the one to want to join the villanous side and feels happier with Gou. The idea of the story for Rocket 'mon to switch sides is great. Excecution however is not.
Like... this line where Musashi says that Sarunori needs to be sent back to HQ to be re-educated specifically ticks me off in bad way and I hate to feel ticked off like this. And this line is all because they weren't allowed to learn more about Sarunori's motives. Because the plot had to be in one episode. I feel like the motives, Rocket Gang's handling and side switching would have worked better for me, if it was a longer built arc. Sort of like how Mijumaru/Oshawott, Hikozaru/Chimchar and the likes of them were done.
And this hurts more because of JN019 where they WERE allowed to bond and perform an act of helping Metamon get back its job. These buffoons KNOW when the 'mon deserves to go to the non-villainous side. And it's all because of JN019 that I feel so strongly ticked off for this line. "We'll... ...have you re-educated". That's not what they were gonna do with Metamon. Like. God damn it.
Rockets were there when Hikozaru switched teams from Shinji to Satoshi. They came to care for the lil monkey before this switch and after this switch. They KNEW it would be better off with Satoshi, and they kept rooting for it from afar, despite constantly trying to steal it. That's their job. Same with how Nyarth comes to like the Honcho Nyabby, due to its background, and finds peace with knowing that Nyabby will find a happy life with Satoshi. All of these examples are exactly why I strongly dislike how Jn059 handled Rockets, and I so god damn wish they would have ACCEPTED that Saruroni should join Gou, but make it so that they'd have to rescue Sarunori instead of giving it to them just like that. They're not heartless.
Unless this was an act from them. Which I doubt since Nyarth learns about Sarunori wanting to go with Gou late into the episode and then trying to deny it having been said??? Uuuugh. This episode really could have used more build up and different handling with Rockets.
Another option that would have made me like Sarunori's capture was if it had been some other Rockets it escaped from, like Matori Matrix or sudden return of Yamato and Kosaburo, or something else. I LIKE the idea of Sarunori being a Rocket 'mon, so I wouldn't change it. I just don't like that it was OUR beloved Rockets that had to be treating it this way.
Sigh. Now that that's out of the way. What else is there to say. Well. How would I try improving Rockets in JN? Simple: give them their own Pokémon to care for. Make them bond with more than just Chewtle. Let them have Pokémon they can bond with and show their loving side with. It's severely lacking right now and I feel like most Rocket fans are really missing this aspect a lot. Also please don't make them act like they don't understand Pokémon's feelings. They do. I'm glad that Satoshi still knows that Rockets care for Pokémon of their own and wouldn't treat them badly, but it still isn't showcased that well in JN. So I wish it would improve on that. I would also seriously love it if some of their old 'mon from past shows would come up from the Gacha Machine, as I'd imagine them being put inside there as well. It did have tons of Gulpin inside for some reason.... Sakaki, wtf.
Well. I guess there's not much else to talk about regarding Rockets. In short, I love Rockets, but I'm not happy with how they're handled in JN fully and despite there being couple really good episodes for them, and some of the episodes have excellent usage with them (like JN038 where Musashi just casually says "Evening" to Satoshi when he discovers them hiding in bushes, sajhgshfsghjf forever love that moment). I just want better handling with their righteus evil.
So. What's up next? I'm thinking about compiling a post of COTDs and supporting cast next time, which would include the likes of Kikuna, Renji, Sakuragi, family casts etc.
So, thanks for reading if you got this far, hope you enjoyed it despite possibly disagreeing with me, and I hope you'll all have a fantastic day.
Til next time! Aleira, aka Smiling Performer, signing out!
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a fine line, part one
a/n: did you really think i could control myself enough to NOT do an enemies to lovers professor!bucky fic? did you really think i have that much willpower? i fucking love this trope and it’s so cute and i definitely will be doing more of these. k bye! leave feedback if ya want, and as per usual, don’t copy/share w/o my consent! if you read this all, luv u tons <33! - ali
wc: 4.2k words
-
Walking into your office bright and early was always the worst part of your day. Not because you hated your job, or because you hated the students you taught, but because of your neighbor.
Being a college English professor was something you dreamed of since you were a young girl, and it was something that you thoroughly enjoyed doing every single day.
Even if it meant being up before 7 AM during the week.
But something that never failed to irritate the absolute everliving fuck out of you when you walked in was Dr. James Barnes.
Dr. Barnes was an incredibly educated man. He could tell you anything about historical events. Any day, any year, any country. But there was something about him that gave off an air of arrogance and ‘I’m better than you because of all my friends in the staff.’ You only joined the English Department of the Avengers University about a year ago, but in your time there, you’ve already built a strong reputation for yourself.
Unfortunately, you were a bit shy when it came to conversing with your coworkers. Your most prominent friends who you’ve made are Natasha Romanoff and Wanda Maximoff, the Russian Literature and Studies professors. They were the ones you gravitated to the most, naturally, and have been incredible friends since you started this job.
While they’ve been friendly, you’ve been having a pretty difficult time breaking out of your shell. You tend not to really put yourself out there in terms of sociality because of how unfamiliar you were with the setting, but you were slowly building your confidence to truly get to know your coworkers.
Steve Rogers, one of your fellow English professors, came into your classroom on this gloomy, early Monday morning with a cup of coffee in both hands.
“Mornin, Dr. Y/L/N.” Steve says while placing your cup on your desk, taking a fine morning?” He asks, breaking into a grin.
Steve was contagious when it came to his happiness and uplifting mood, and you matched his smile with one of your own.
“I’m just peachy, Professor Rogers. How was your weekend?” You ask, opening your laptop and reaching for your lesson binder.
“It was actually really nice. I got my grading and planning for the week done last week so I got to spend time with the fiancée.” He smiles, leaning back in his chair.
“Oh, how nice! What’s her name again...? I keep forgetting, forgive me.” You laugh, failing to recall the name of Steve’s beloved.
“No worries, Y/L/N.” Steve laughs at your aloofness, “it’s Peggy. She actually works as a military strategist.” He says with a proud smile, which you took notice of rather quickly.
“That’s really interesting... I would never even be capable of doing anything with the military.” You giggle, making sure you have everything ready for your lesson today.
“So... Y/N.” At the mention of your first name, your head shoots up in concern. Was something wrong? “Do you have anyone special at home?” Steve asks.
Your mouth felt dry at the question. You know Steve probably wasn’t trying to pry, but you couldn’t help feel yourself shrink under the question.
“I- uh, no. Unless my cat counts.” You try to lighten the mood and lessen the speeding of your heart.
Steve takes notice of your bright blush and embarrassment. To be fair, you were embarrassed. You were well into your twenties, a successful woman with a stable job, but little to social life. Or love life, at that.
“You have a cat?! Let me see ‘em!” Steve exclaims, trying to deflect from the previous question.
“Oh! This is her...” You say, flipping a frame facing you on your desk to Steve. In the picture frame was a beautiful, tiny black cat. “Her name is Lucy.” You tell him, smiling fondly at the image.
“How old is she?” Steve asks.
“She actually just turned a year old. I thought it would be nice to have some company in my apartment when I moved here. I was getting a bit lonely.” You tell him, reminiscing on when you first adopted Lucy.
“She’s a real sweetheart.” Steve’s not able to wipe his grin away while looking at the furry animal.
“Oh, you don’t even know. She’s a spoiled little thing, you should see her when I leave in the mornings.” You scoff, looking back to your checklist on your computer.
“Y’know, Bucky has a cat, too. I think he would like to know that someone else around here has one, the rest of us all have dogs.” Steve mentions casually, but your brows furrow in confusion.
“I-I’m sorry, I know I haven’t been the most sociable person here since I arrived, but... who’s Bucky? I don’t think I’ve met someone with that name...” You search your brain for any recollection of meeting someone named Bucky, but you were coming up completely short.
“Oh! Bucky is what James usually goes by... I mean, normally people don’t call him James, just Bucky or Barnes as nicknames, y’know?” Steve clarifies.
“Oh, that makes sense,” you say with a slight laugh, “Dr. Barnes and I haven’t interacted very much since I started here... I get the feeling he’s not too fond of me.” You say with a smile to not make Steve uncomfortable. You knew the two of them were friends, as they were always chatting in the professor’s lounge and cracking jokes.
“Bucky...? Not fond of you? Did something happen between you two that I wasn’t aware of? You’re not unlikable or anything...” Steve wonders out loud, trying to understand.
“I-I’m not too sure, Professor Rogers.” You try to stop the conversation here before things got too blown out of proportion. “I hate to cut this short, b-but I’ve got a lecture in ten minutes, so I should get going.” You tell him curtly, gathering your things into your tote and seeing Steve out of your office.
“I’ll catch ya later, Y/L/N!” Steve says as he walks in the direction of his office down the hall.
“See you, Rogers!” You say back, making your way out of the building to the next.
Just as you locked your office shut, you see a head poking out of the office next yours.
You keep your head down, not really wanting to engage in any aggressive banter right before your lecture.
But of course, Dr. Barnes had other ideas. And while you really didn’t have the time, Barnes definitely did.
“Mornin’, Professor Y/L/N! Already late to your first class of the week?” James calls from his spot as you walk in the opposite direction to the exit of the building.
“I’m actually perfectly on time, Dr. Barnes. And it’s Doctor! Have a good day!” You turn back briefly for about two seconds to meet his gaze, and walk into the biting morning air, ready for the long day ahead.
Dr. Barnes, damn you for making my days ten times longer than usual.
-
Going home was always your favorite part of the day. Your apartment was your safe place, your place where you could drop the professionalism and not worry about having to interact with other people.
Most of your nights were spent reading, watching movies, learning new recipes, and whatever you could do to take some time to yourself. Lucy was roaming the kitchen while you were trying to perfect your latest baked good.
As Lucy intertwines herself between your legs, you look down, making sure you don’t trip over yourself.
“Luce, you have a whole plaything set up over there, why do you insist on putting yourself right ther-” Just as you were scolding your kitten, your phone rings from its’ spot in front of you on the counter.
“Hello?” You say into the speaker.
“Y/N! How are you?” Natasha’s voice came through the speakers, making you pull the phone away from your ear.
“I-I’m good, Natasha. What’s up?” You ask, wondering why she was calling you since she was very clearly not at home.
“W-Well,” she lets out a laugh with commotion in the background, “a few of us are down at the bar a couple blocks away from your place, I think.” Another round of ruckus in the back, “would you like to join us?”
“O-Oh... who else is there?” Your voice came through softly, making your nervousness evident through the phone.
“Just a few people in our group... Wanda, Banner, Stark, Rogers, Wilson, Odinson...” Natasha’s voice trails off, like she was still going to mention someone else, but was holding her tongue.
“Oh... Uhm, I was just in the middle of a recipe, but I think I could swing by for a bit...” You look down at your mixing bowl, covering it and placing it in the refrigerator.
Lucy scurries through to your closet once you open it, searching for something to wear, because your current situation was quite frankly sweats. Choosing a black turtleneck and jeans, you dab on a little bit of makeup and pull on some boots, making your way to your car and warming it up.
Once you made it to the bar, you were met with a stench that only bars have, one you haven’t smelt in years. College was fun while it lasted, though.
The first person you spot is Wanda, who’s sitting at the bar waiting for drinks, you presume, so you make your way towards her.
“Y/N! I’m so glad you came! Natasha said you were, but we weren’t sure, you don’t normally do, but it’s perfect! I’m so excited, we never hang out too much, you know? And-” Wanda was rambling, and although you could tell she didn’t want to offend you, it stung. You know you haven’t been out with your coworkers, but it was just one of the effects of your social anxiety.
“It’s okay, Wanda. I know, but I’m gonna try to come out more... I think it’s time.” You tell her with a small smile.
“That’s great, Y/N. I’m glad, you deserve to let loose and have fun every once in a while, you know. It’s okay to relax.” She pats your shoulder, and you can feel her warmth in it, both physically and emotionally. It was nice.
“I- Yeah, thanks, Wanda. Do you need a hand with the drinks?” You ask, seeing the two full trays.
“Yes! If you don’t mind, we’re just back there. We got you a drink too, but we didn’t really know what you liked so we just played it safe.” She explains, pointing to the Old Fashioned on the tray.
“Oh! You didn’t have to...” You trail off, placing the tray down on the table.
“Hi, Y/N! Didn’t know you’d be joining us tonight, good to see ya!” Steve says while scooting further down the booth seat to make room for you, everyone else welcoming you.
“Thanks for inviting me, guys. I guess I really did need to get out of the house.” You say while sipping on your drink.
As the chatter around the table starts again, you quickly end up finishing your drink, caught up in the atmosphere around you and how you were having such a good time.
Maybe this isn’t so bad. I should do this more often.
And as this thought came to your head, Natasha sees that you’ve finished your drink, motioning to the empty glass.
“Need another, Y/N?” She points to the bar, “I’ll come with, I need one too.”
You nod, scooting out of the booth.
“I’ll just have a glass of red,” you tell the bartender, Natasha giving you an odd look, “I still have to drive home later..” You laugh when she hums in realization.
While waiting, a tall guy with dark hair is already chatting up Natasha. And just when you didn’t think your night could get any weirder, you feel someone come up next to you.
“What’s a gorgeous girl like you doing here all by yourse-” But the voice was cut short as soon as you turned your head towards whoever it was. As soon as your mind recognized the face, your eyes widened, met with equally wide, ocean blue eyes.
“Y/N?! What the hell are you doing here?” Bucky’s voice was filled with confusion and mild disgust, ouch.
“I-I was invited... By Natasha...” Your voice was meeker than you wanted it to sound, because who the hell was Bucky to question why you were here?
“Oh. I didn’t know it was you, for the record.” Bucky states, watching in satisfaction as you look down at your wineglass that the bartender placed in front of you. She gave you a sympathetic look, turning back to another customer.
“I-Yeah, I figured, Barnes. Sorry to disappoint you, I suppose.” You grab the glass and walk back to the table, trying to not look as though someone just called you ugly to your face.
“Y’know, I don’t quite understand why you can’t just let her be.” Bucky turns his gaze to Natasha.
“I just... don’t like her. It’s as simple as that, Nat. She walks around acting all high and mighty, like she isn’t equal to us.” He reasons, trying to make his point.
“Bucky... Maybe if you took five seconds to get rid of that ego of yours, you’d know the kind of person she is. And she is most definitely not as pretentious as you’ve made her out to be. She’s a human being, just like the rest of us here.” Natasha finishes defending you, turning back to the table, leaving Bucky even more confused than before.
-
As the night went on, you very evidently avoided anything that had to do with Bucky. If he came by the table, you would waver your gaze elsewhere, and if he initiated the conversation, you would keep quiet. Although you knew it was probably the easiest way to avoid conflict with him, you could tell you were folding in on yourself.
And Wanda and Natasha most definitely noticed.
Every time Bucky spoke, it was like you would disconnect. Focus your mind elsewhere, filling your head with thoughts completely unrelated to your current atmosphere.
“Y/N, what do you have planned for the holiday break?” Sam’s voice pipes up, trying to include you in the conversation.
“Oh, uhm... Not much, I usually stay at home and make myself a nice meal. Take some time to myself, y’know.” You smile at the thought of the holiday season. You were completely ready to take the time off to catch up on self care.
“Oh, no family to go see?” Steve’s voice asks from across the booth.
“Uh... no, not really.” You try let out a light laugh at the answer, trying to not show the stiffness of your body at the topic at hand.
“I-I’m sorry, Y/N, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable...” Steve says, trying to rectify the situation.
“No! You’re completely okay, Steve.” You reassure him, not wanting to make things even more uncomfortable.
“Well, now that we’re on the topic,” Bucky’s voice breaks the silence, “Y/N, how come we know, like... nothing about you? You’ve been at the university for a bit now and this is the first time we’re seeing you outside of work.” Bucky’s expression was smug as could be, and you were really fighting the urge to cry right now.
“Bucky, leave her alone.” Wanda’s voice was coming as a warning, daring Bucky to go even further.
“No, I’m not trying to sound rude or anything,” Bucky keeps pushing, “but you just seem to act like we don’t deserve your time, like you’re better than all of us or something.”
“Buck, that’s enough.” Steve’s voice was like ice. “Just leave her alone, for God’s sake.”
The table falls silent, your eyes fixed on your hands in your lap.
“I-I’m sorry, guys...” Your voice was holding on by a thread. “I think I should go, thank you so much for inviting me out with you guys. Have a good night.” And with that, you slip out of the booth, disappearing out the front door at an exceptional speed.
The rest of the table was watching Bucky with several emotions, including mild disgust, anger, and hopelessness.
When will this stop?
-
That night when you return to Lucy, you were drained. Tired. Exhausted. Ever since you were a child, it seemed that you couldn’t outgrow your shyness and quietness. The only place that made you feel like you belonged was your lecture hall. And although you tried, several times, to overcome this horrid quality of yours, it seemed that you could never escape it.
It just always came back.
And you know how it made you seem to others. Pretentious, snobby, it gave you an air of a superiority complex.
When in reality, it was exactly the opposite. You were so afraid to speak sometimes that you just choose not to. You didn’t want to be judged or ridiculed for saying the wrong things, so you thought it was better to keep quiet.
Becoming a professor definitely helped you break out of that shell a little bit, but it never really translated outside of the classroom.
Flopping down on your grey comforter, you realize that you couldn’t continue to feel like this. It was years and years of meekness, of keeping to yourself. That was the reason why you were almost 30 with no boyfriend, no fiancé, and certainly no husband or child.
You knew you had to make a change, but you didn’t quite know how to. But that’s something you’ll have to worry about later, because you were close to passing out right now.
-
The following week had been... different. You were spending less of your lunch hours in your office, alone, and finally accepting Natasha and Wanda’s consistent invites to eat with them. It took them by surprise at first, but they welcomed you with open arms.
It was now Thursday, and you were in Wanda’s office, digging into your pasta salad that you’d packed.
“So, Y/N, just out of curiosity...” Natasha speaks through her lunch, “What suddenly made you want to join us? I mean, after last week, I wouldn’t be surprised if you never wanted to see us again.” She laughs a breath out, clearly feeling guilty for last weeks’ events.
“Well,” you supply after a moment to think, “I realized something. After James... spoke his mind, I guess you could say, I realized that he was right, in a way.”
“Wha-” Wanda interjected but you continued to explain.
“I realized that I had removed myself so far from the people that I see every single day so much that they don’t even know me. And it’s been like this most of my life... I usually just keep to myself, but I think that even though I’m terrified of speaking to people I don’t know, it’ll never get better unless I actually try.” You release, feeling a metaphorical weight lift off your chest.
“Well, Y/N, I’m glad you finally chose to let us in... But Bucky was still an asshole, and totally out of line. We know we can’t speak for him, but we’re all really sorry for what he said... He doesn’t even know you, and he shouldn’t have made those assumptions about you.” Wanda says after a moment of silence.
“Thank you, guys.” You smile, gathering your things and standing up. “I have a lecture to prepare for, but... thank you for everything, both of you. It’s been a long time since I’ve had good people in my life that I can call my friends.” You’re shocked at the fact that you feel two sets of arms wrap around you at your confession, holding you tight.
“Y/N, you don’t ever have to thank us for being your friends... you deserve good things, never forget that.” Natasha tells you, and for the first time, you actually believe it.
“Okay, I actually have to go now, but I’ll see you two later?” You ask, already halfway out the door.
“Yeah, we’ll text you!” Wanda yells back, and you’re making your way back to your office to gather your belongings for the lecture.
But of course, you could never get ready for a class without Barnes popping out and giving you a little pep talk.
“Afternoon, Y/L/N. Getting ready to bore another groups of kids to death?” He asks, a smug look on his face with a mug held in his hand.
“Actually, Dr. Barnes, I happen to have excellent students who truly enjoy being in my class, being that I don’t teach any 101s, that’s more Steve’s part. But thanks for the concern.” You tell him, shutting the door behind you and letting out a deep breath you didn’t know you were holding in.
You’ve never spoken to anyone like that in your life before.
And James was equally shocked at your attitude, standing in his doorway, dumbfounded with his mouth hanging open. He was staring at your shut door, wondering where the quick with came from.
He begrudgingly turns back into his own office, truly trying to process what just occurrfaxed.
While you slung your bag over your shoulder, there was an infectious smile gracing your face, proud of not being his doormat for the first time.
That day, class was even better than usual, and you even let your students out early, telling them to enjoy the rest of their day.
And that night, you went home feeling the best you’ve felt in a long time.
-
You went into the university the next week feeling refreshed from you girl’s weekend that you hosted at your apartment, inviting Natasha and Wanda, and even another professor named Carol who you’ve recently befriended as well- to unwind and have fun with.
And as you swing the usually locked door of your office open with ease, your eyebrows furrowed.
I remember locking it when I left on Friday...
But the only thing that seems to out of place is the iced americano and chocolate croissant sitting on your desk.
On the bag of the croissant, there was writing that read, ‘Thought I’d make it up to you.’
Who the hell would go out of their way to bring me breakfast? You thought to yourself. And they know my usual...
You honestly assumed it could’ve been one of the girls, but you don’t know what they could’ve been making it up to you for. Maybe girl’s night? But still, everyone did a good job of bringing things with them to compensate for you hosting.
But nothing explains the door being unlocked. But you weren’t really afraid. You didn’t keep anything too valuable in there anyways, taking most papers home with you, and keeping classified files sealed in the file cabinet.
It didn’t really scare you, but you truly wondered who would go out of their way to do something like this for you.
The rest of your day went by pretty quickly, and it was oddly quiet. Specifically from the office next door.
It’s now 5 PM, and not a peep from James.
It unsettled you, to say the least. First the breakfast and unlocked office, and now not a word from him.
It was weird.
You spotted him talking to Steve earlier in the day, but you haven’t seen too much of him either.
Although, there was a staff meeting tonight, so you’d definitely see him then.
As you made your way to the designated conference room with Natasha, you see Dean Fury waiting for everyone to arrive. He greets you with his usual disgruntled look, which you’ve learned to not take personally over the time you’ve spent here at Avengers University.
Slowly, everyone made it in, taking a seat.
“Good evening, staff. I hope you’ve all had a productive day thus far, but there’s a reason I’ve called you here tonight. I have a proposal for all of you.” Fury explains, making you all curious.
“I’ve decided, after a few months of toying with the idea, I’d like to do partner teaching. Each and every one of you will be assigned a counterpart, and you will both help each other in making the others’ teaching environment better. Here at AU, we’re committed to always pushing the envelope, and that means that sometimes, you’ll have to get uncomfortable. And if you’re wondering, there’s no way out of this. You all have to do it. Each one of you has received an email to your .edu inbox with your partner assignment and further instructions on how this will be done.” A pause overtook the room as everyone pulled out their phones to check their emails. “Happy teaching, we start next week, folks.” Fury finishes, exiting the room.
Meanwhile, you couldn’t believe your eyes when they saw the opened email.
Dr. Y/L/N, you’ve been selected to teach alongside Dr. Barnes.
Oh fuck no.
And the look he was sharing with you from across the table confirmed he was thinking the exact same thing.
-
a/n pt.2: ooooooh cliffhangerrr!!! holy shit y’all this bitch long asf. don’t worry, part 2 will be coming soon! comment and lmk what you thought down below! this might have a part 3, i haven’t decided yet !! lol, anyways, i have class in an hour, so bye! if you made it this far, i seriously love and. appreciate you!
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky imagine#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fic#bucky x y/n#bucky x reader#prof!bucky#professor!bucky#prof!bucky x prof!reader#college professor au#Bucky Barnes#bucky fic#ive been writing this for so long omf
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My Plus-One (Part 1)
EZ Reyes x Reader
Request by the lovely @ly--canthrope: The reader has a large ball/award ceremony/something fancy to attend. Her and Ez have been in each other's lives for years and they make a promise that each year, if there is an event to go to, they would go together. Its been a few years since this tradition has played out, and it is brought up in conversation (maybe talking about their plans for that week, what they are doing and busy with etc) and Ez goes, “I am busy, I am going with you to your event” and he is a pure gentlemen (You can decide thing like; are they bordering that blurred line where they are really affectionate with one another and time frame like, he could be at uni still and travels to go see her just for this event because its special to her)
Warnings: none. just some good old pining 🥺🥺
Word Count: 3.4k
A/N: I loved writing this so much wtf. I switched up the timing of it a little bit but I think it worked out well! I got a little carried away with it (hence the 3.4k lmao) but I just love EZ and I’m a sucker for friendships with feelings. Please enjoy! (requests are always open)
EZ Tag: @noz4a2 (if you wanna be added just shoot me a message!)
(Part 2)
You wandered around your small studio apartment, phone held loosely in your hand while you video-chatted with EZ. Both of you had long since given up on making sure that you held the camera at flattering angles. Besides, you were trying to make dinner and not even EZ could stop you from getting food.
“So glad I get to have this conversation with half of your face,” he laughed, shaking his head.
You held the phone up so you could get a better look at him—he was sitting at the table in his trailer, phone propped up as he typed away on his laptop. “This better?” you laughed as you tried to set it up on your counter so he could see more of your face.
“Much,” he smiled, “I miss you.”
You glanced over at him as you turned the stove on, “Miss you too, EZ.”
“So,” you could hear the clicking of his keyboard in the background, “what’re your plans for the week?”
“Meh, not a whole lot going on. I do, though, have a gala for work this Saturday.”
“Oh?” he raised his eyebrows, “Sounds fancy.”
You chuckled, nodding as you waited for your water to boil, “Yea, kinda. I was thinking,” you looked at him through the lens of your phone, “If you aren’t busy, and if you really miss me, you could maybe come and be my date. It’s all paid for and everything already. All you’d have to do is show up and be my arm-candy,” you batted your eyelashes.
“Ah, like the good old days.”
“C’mon, it’s been a while since one of us had to drag the other to an event that was way above our paygrade.”
“What’re you talking about? You just drove out to visit me last year for an event.”
You rolled your eyes, “Your patch-in party is not the same as a fundraising gala, Ezekiel. Although,” you laughed, “it was undoubtedly more fun than this is going to be.”
“Giving me the hard sell, Y/N,” he laughed and shook his head.
“If you’re too busy with club shit, I get it. I know I didn’t really give you much of a heads-up.”
“Well…” he dragged out the word, milking every letter for all it was worth, “I am gonna be busy.”
“Fuck,” you sighed, “I get it, I do. Sorry I always protcrastin—”
“Let me finish,” he smiled, “I’m gonna be busy with you, so I’ll let the guys know that my weekend is booked.”
You laughed, clapping your hands excitedly, “Yay! Oh, I can’t wait to see you. I feel like it’s been forever.”
“Because it has,” he waited for you to look back to your phone, “When was the last time you came back home to SanPa?”
You sighed, shaking your head, “God, like, six months maybe? Maybe a little more? Work has just been nuts, you know?”
“You think they’re gonna relocate you back closer to home any time soon?”
You shrugged, “Not sure. I hope so, though. I miss bugging you all the time in person not just by blowing up your phone.”
“Well, you’ll get to bug me in person all weekend. Text me your address and anything else I should know. I can probably come out Friday night if that works for you?”
You nodded, “Yea, that’s fine by me. You can crash here if you want but I gotta warn you, my place is wicked small.”
“I’m currently living in a trailer, Y/N,” he chuckled, “I’m sure we’ll be fine.”
“Alright,” your heart felt so much lighter knowing that he was going to be able to go with you—you hated going to these kinds of things by yourself, “I’ll text you all the details and stuff later this week.”
“Sounds good. Go back to making your gourmet ramen over there,” he chuckled, “I’ll see you soon. Love you.”
“Love you too, EZ,” you waved goodbye before hanging up the call. You let out a sigh of relief as you tucked your phone back into your pocket.
The week seemed to fly by. Any time that you felt yourself getting stressed, or overwhelmed, or homesick, you remembered that you were going to be able to spend the whole weekend with your best friend. It made the rest of your problems seem so insignificant. Every night you’d come home and you’d see your dress hanging against the door of your closet, begging to be worn. You’d smile and run your fingers along the fabric whenever you’d walk by it. Back when you were in high school and college, the two of you went to everything together. Each prom, award ceremony, induction ceremony, friends’ weddings, you name it, it was the two of you showing up together no matter what. You had your own unspoken language, knowing when the other was ready to tap out and call it a night. Sometimes to keep things interesting you’d try to sneak out unseen, other times one of you would come up with any excuse you could so that you could leave early without anyone giving you a hard time about it. It’d been a few years since either of you had an excuse to get dressed up together.
You were finishing cleaning up your apartment when you felt your phone going off in your pocket. You glanced down and smiled at the sigh of EZ’s name on the screen, “Hey, what’s up? Everything okay?”
“Yea. I think,” he chuckled, “I think I’m outside the right building? Everything looks the same here.”
You laughed as you walked over and peeked out your window. Sure enough, you saw him sitting, leaning against his bike, “I see you. I’ll be right down,” you hung up and made sure to close your closet door before heading downstairs to greet him.
You came barreling out the front door of your apartment building, tackling him in a hug. He laughed, sweeping you up off of your feet and swinging you around as he held you tight to him. You wrapped your legs around his waist, forcing him to hold you for a few moments. It had been way too long since you last saw him in person.
“I’ve missed you,” you mumbled against his neck.
“I’ve missed you too.”
You finally let go, dropping your feet back to the ground. You helped EZ get his two bags and had him follow you up the stairs to your apartment. You kept apologizing in advance for the fact that all you had was a studio, so there wasn’t going to be a lot of room, and there was no grand tour to give him. He smiled and shook his head, constantly telling you that he didn’t care.
You opened the door, dropping one of his bags next to the couch, “This is,” you chuckled, “my beautiful kingdom.”
EZ smiled as he looked around your apartment. It was a studio, so there wasn’t a whole lot of space, but it was all modern and renovated. He was impressed by how much you had managed to utilize the space. He also liked being able to see how you chose to decorate a space that was completely your own. The last time he got to visit you, you had been sharing an apartment with a roommate and the two of you had completely opposite tastes in décor. He liked the vibe you had created—a lot of bright, happy colors. He recognized some of the art on the walls as things you had commissioned your friends to make for you because you liked having things that were one-of-a-kind.
“This is a pretty great spot, Y/N.”
You smiled, “Thanks. It’s home for now,” you sighed, “I have no guest room to offer you, but the couch does pull out so you won’t be too crammed for the next couple nights.”
He chuckled, nodding, “I appreciate it.”
“You eat before you left?”
He nodded, “Yea I’m all set. Didn’t want to be taking any of your ramen from you.”
You gave him a playful slap to the arm, “So considerate.”
The two of you spent the night sitting on the couch together catching up, a show on the television just for background noise. It crept late into the night before the exhaustion started to show on EZ’s face. He had had a long day but he was enjoying the fact that he was actually face-to-face with you for the first time in months.
“I’ll let you get some sleep,” you smiled as you stood up off the couch, “If you’re up for it in the morning there’s a really good coffee spot a few blocks from here.”
He smiled, nodding, “Sounds good.”
“Bathroom is right through there if you wanna change. I’ll see you in the morning,” you leaned in and gave him a hug that you dragged out to last a little longer than you usually would, “Goodnight.”
The morning and afternoon flew right by, and before you knew it the two of you were getting ready for the gala. You chastised EZ for leaving his dress clothes in his bags for so long. All these years and he still hadn’t figured out that they needed to hang to cut down on wrinkles. You ironed out his slacks and shirt, impressed by the fact that he had also brought a suit jacket. It was an all-black ensemble that you knew would make your coworkers drool over him, and you were going to soak up every second of that.
You left the bathroom open for him to get changed as you retreated to the semi-privacy of the space that passed for your bedroom. You shimmied into your dress, pulling the straps up onto your shoulders. You zipped it up as much as you could without risking ripping any of the stitching, thankful that you had EZ to help you with it the rest of the way. You looked at yourself in the mirror and smiled, still loving the dress as much as you had the day you tried it on in the store.
You had settled on a deep burgundy dress. It was a little low-cut, but not so much that you felt overly exposed. It was floor length, and had a slit up to just below your hip that you could only see once you started walking. You had picked up some simple jewelry—a few gold bangles and a long necklace that draped down your chest. Deciding to pull the whole look together with your favorite pair of black heels. A little height boost when you were walking with EZ never hurt.
“Hey, EZ? Can you come finish zipping me up?”
You heard the sounds of his dress shoes on the hardwood. He poked his head around the half-wall that separated your bed from the rest of your apartment. His eyes grew wide as he took in the sight of you. He cleared his throat, trying to get his thoughts in order as he remembered the actual reason you had called him over.
You pulled your hair off to the side and turned so your back was to him, thankful that it gave the added benefit of hiding the giant grin on your face. He tried to be as gentle as possible, the rough pads of his fingers grazing lightly against your back as he pulled the zipper up the last of the way.
“You look amazing, Y/N,” he smiled at you.
“Yea, we clean up alright, don’t we?” you patted his chest, practically salivating over the sight of him in dress clothes for the first time in years. You reached and undid the top button of his shirt, allowing a little bit of his collarbone to be exposed.
“Feeling a little risqué tonight?” he chuckled.
“Who knows when we’re going to get to do this again?” you smiled, “Might as well make the most of it.”
“I was gonna offer to take you on the bike,” he laughed as he looked you up and down for the hundredth time in two minutes, “But I don’t think that dress would make it.”
You nodded, “You’re right. We’ll take my car,” you walked over and grabbed the small clutch that you had picked up just for this occasion, pulling your keys out of it, “You ready?”
“I think so,” he patted his pockets down to make sure that he still had his phone and wallet, “You gonna give me the dirt on all your coworkers on the ride over?”
“Of course,” you smiled as you ushered him out the door, locking it behind the two of you.
You parked the car at the venue and EZ all but leapt out of the car to come and open your door for you. You chuckled as he held his hand out to help you step out onto the pavement. He hadn’t even wanted you to be the one to drive there, but you insisted since he knew nothing about the area.
He gently wrapped his arm around your waist as the two of you walked into the venue. You knew that your coworkers weren’t expecting you to show up with a plus-one. You had been quite clear about the fact that you weren’t dating anyone, and that no one at your job interested you enough to break your, “I don’t date coworkers” rule. There were quite a few lax jaws as the two of you strolled into the event room. Anyone else might have been nervous, but EZ saw how much you loved it and he was eating up every second of it.
You brought him around and introduced him to everyone, reveling in the fact that his arm never left your waist. After a handful of introductions, you dragged him across the room to introduce you to your boss.
“Cynthia,” you smiled wide, “This is my friend Ezekiel. Ezekiel, this is my boss Cynthia.”
“Please, call me Cindy,” she held out her hand, eyes slowly raking over the man you had put in front of her, not that you could blame her, “It’s nice to meet you, Ezekiel. I have to admit, Y/N here is a bit of an enigma around the office,” she turned her attention to you, “You look amazing, by the way.”
You smiled, “Thank you, so do you. A little more than business casual, huh?”
She laughed, nodding, “That’s for sure,” she paused, “Also, don’t forget, it’s open bar. So help yourselves.”
You tapped your fingers together mischievously, “Ah, don’t mind if I do.”
“I’ll make sure to catch up with you two later,” she smiled at EZ, “It was nice to meet you, Ezekiel.”
“Nice to meet you too,” he nodded politely before she walked away, swept up in a sea of other conversations.
“Remind me to keep a close eye on you around her,” you laughed, “Don’t want her snatching you up.”
The night wore on, and you were impressed with how easily EZ blended into the crowd with everyone from work. He made his way through a lot of small talk, a lot of, “So how do you know Y/N?” and other questions of the sort. The whole night he couldn’t help but to keep looking over at you, making sure that he had physical contact with you in one way or another. You couldn’t pretend that you minded it.
By your fourth glass of wine EZ had managed to get your keys from you, promising that he would drive the both of you back to your apartment safely and responsibly. His largest obstacle of the evening was hiding your bidding number sign from you so you didn’t spend money that you didn’t have.
“You’re the one who told me,” he said quietly in your ear, trying to suppress a laugh, “that your financial contribution was the, and I quote, buttload of money you paid for our tickets here.”
You huffed, trying and failing to give him a displeased expression, “But I wanna feel like a fancy rich person, EZ.”
He smiled at you, resting his hand on your thigh, “You’re certainly dressed like one, Y/N, so for tonight that’ll have to be enough. And besides, I’m your personal chauffer, so it doesn’t get more fancy rich person than that.”
You smirked over at him, placing your hand on top of his and interlocking your fingers, “I’m really glad that you’re here.”
He squeezed your fingers lightly, “Yea, me too.”
The evening was beginning to wind down, and EZ could see it on your face that if he didn’t get you out soon, you were going to start causing trouble. It was fine when the two of you were out among people you didn’t know, but he didn’t think that he’d be a very good friend if he let you start drunkenly stirring the pot with your coworkers. He convinced you to start saying your goodbyes, his hand placed on the small of your back as the two of you maneuvered through the small crowds of people in the event space.
You were walking through the parking garage, your hand entwined with his as you swung your arms back and forth, “What a night!”
EZ chuckled, spinning you carefully so you didn’t fall over, but still got to enjoy the flow of your dress when you spun and moved, “I’m honored I got the invite.”
“You sure you’re good to drive?”
He laughed, nodding, “I’m sure. Not like you could take over for me anyway.”
He helped you into the passenger seat before going around and getting in, sliding the seat back so he could actually fit. He chuckled as he saw you out of the corner of his eye, peeling your shoes off before you even left the parking garage. The whole drive home you went on and on about how much your coworkers loved him, you could just tell. He smiled and nodded, letting one hand stray and come to rest on your thigh.
He parked outside your apartment building and you looked over at him with your biggest puppy-dog eyes, “Ezekiel, I don’t wanna put my shoes back on. Will you carry me upstairs?”
He laughed and nodded, “Yes, but only because tonight you’re a fancy rich lady.”
“You’re so good to me. I love you,” you smiled over at him.
He felt his heart beating harder inside his chest, “I love you too.”
He carried you bridal style up the stairs with such ease. You loved every moment of it. He held onto you as you unlocked the door, still wrapped up in his arms. You giggled into his neck as he kicked the door shut behind you and turned the deadbolt. He carried you to your bed, setting you down gently. You smiled up at him from your mattress, reaching out and taking his hand in your own.
“I’ve missed you so much, EZ.”
He traced his thumb over your knuckles, “Yea, I’ve missed you too.”
Before he could walk out to collapse on the couch you asked him, “Can you help me with my dress?”
He swallowed hard, nodding, “Yea, of course, whatever you need.”
You pulled your hair off to the side again so he could pull the zipper down. If you didn’t know any better, you’d say that there was a slight trembling to his hands as he fumbled with the zipper, pulling it down slowly. He took a deep breath as he gently pushed the straps down off your shoulders. You hummed in approval as you leaned back against him, melting into him as he wrapped his arms around your waist. There were a few beats of silence before you felt him lightly press his lips against the bare skin of your shoulder, gently kissing the soft skin there.
Your breath caught in your throat and it took you a second to get the words out, “You could, um,” you were thankful that you weren’t facing him so he couldn’t see the nervousness on your face, “you could stay in my bed tonight…if you wanted. It’s probably…you know…more comfortable than the couch.”
His lips were still pressed against your shoulder and you could feel his laughter vibrate against your skin, “Yea? You sure?”
You turned around so you were facing him. He leaned in, resting his forehead against yours. He was holding you close enough that you were certain that he could feel your heart palpitating, “Yea. I’m not ready to give up your company yet.”
He kissed your forehead, “Let’s get to bed then.”
#mayans mc#mayans fx#mayansmc#mayans mc imagine#ezekiel reyes#ezekiel reyes imagine#ez reyes#ez reyes x you#ez reyes x reader#ez reyes imagine#ez reyes fanfic#ezekiel reyes x reader#ezekiel reyes fanfic#fanfiction#my writing#drabblesmc#request#ez request
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TALK TO US ABOUT MASS EFFECT I HAVE BEEN AN INSANE MASS EFFECT/SHAKARIAN TRASH PERSON SINCE 20-FUCKING-11 AND LEMME TELL YOU THOSE FEELINGS HAVENOT TARNISHED A SINGLE FRACTION IN THOSE TEN YEARS OH MY GOOOOOOODDDSSSS!!!!!!!
I DEMAND A PLAY-BY-PLAY UP TO THE MINUTE OF YOUR REACTIONS TO EVERYTHING!!!!
you are so valid and I totally see why everyone I've ever mentioned it to loves the hell out of it
aksdjlsdfj I meannnn if you want to hear my rambling about it then hell yeah
Okay, gonna put this below the cut to save everyone else XD also- since I'm not leaving this Mass Effect obsession anytime soon, if you're not interested in seeing occasional posts about it, please feel free to block the tag "night plays ME"~
(mild spoilers ahead??)
((also for real I mean it when I say this is rambling as hell lol, apologies and no stress if absolute no one reads all this))
OKAY SO Mass Effect 1-
Stars help me, I was honestly hooked right from the start?? Like even in Legendary Edition (the combined trilogy just re-released in one "can play it on one system + minor improvements", for anyone who doesn't know) where it's smoothed out, of course it's obvious that ME1 is a decade old... but the foundation for these relationships are all there and gods I love them already.
Like - Kaiden right off the top is a delightful good fightin lad, what the hell. I've heard that he's viewed as 'bland' by a good portion of the fan community but I dunno, he's a delight and even more complex by the time 2 rolls around and you encounter him on Horizon, it was honestly Ashley I was way more meh about - mostly because before you can learn about her family history/etc, she comes off as hella xenophobic and I was immediately offended for my growing space family that she didn't like/trust all the aliens around, pfff.
(she gets redeemed a bit through further actions/evolving thoughts, but I thought in retrospect it was a bummer that they didn't flip the order there, give her a chance to be liked before the complicating factor of being so rude about aliens >:c that then she could grow from... ah well. Apparently she has a good arc but uh, let's just say I chose Kaiden at the "key junction" in the latter part of the game so I won't be seeing anymore of Ashley uh... anytime soon, haha.)
Garrus??? Is??????? The ABSOLUTE best???????????
I liked him from the start, I'm always a bit of a sucker for a rogue-detective "the system won't bring this bastard to justice, so I've got to" type and all their moral shadiness XD But he just gets better, honestly, and where I'm at in ME2 (right before the Reaper IFF mission, as of typing this, with everyone's loyalty!) I am only digging myself deeper into this hole-
-*wheezing* okay anyways -
Wrex is AMAZING I love fightin' middle-aged krogan bastard, gods. Liara is great too, I'm a sucker for a wlw relationship (playing fem!Shepard, so) - buuuut I'll admit she's a bit more one-note in ME1. Last week while I was still on ME1 I remember hearing (while trying to dodge spoilers) that her arc is really good, though. I think they leaned a little hard on the 'innocent but sexy' sterteotype on her (so despite the yikes aspect of a few of the things I've learned in ME2, lol, I actually really like the complexity that's been added to her character.)
Saved Liara first, so by the time I got to Noveria and had the standoff with Benezia there was the chance to have emotions over Liara having to face her TwT and of course, I made the questionable but quality decision to free Queen Rachni heheh. no ragrets
More than a blow-by-blow of my choices though I totally wanna take the chance to say that even in the mild jankiness of ME1 (goddammit, the Mako.... please..... please just go up this impossible cliff I just want to resource hunt-) the way that the lore, both obvious/key to main plot and the lesser/filler/background/world-building kinds... I just love it. It incorporates it well, you can go ham in the codex learning more, or just dive into the basics - it's clearly a complex galaxy (and they do an even better job in 2 of fleshing it out further), and it never really felt overwhelming. It was pretty natural figuring it all out-!
Plus the interesting implications of resource hunting amongst the sapient races, and the little side missions you better bet I did every one of- there's so much rich depth in the story if you do 'em!! (And that lead with that Keeper side mission...? Looking back, damn, clever foreshadowing-!!!)
And oh my gods, Ilios??? hell yeah. I loved that mission so much, especially having Garrus & Kaiden with me when talking to the hologram/computer, and more than anything, that last sprint in the Mako trying to get to the jump before it closed-???
yeet the boi-
Also mannn I love a good setpiece, and having to go up the side of the elevator, space-side?? such a cool setup!!
Plus it felt good having been Paragon enough (as simple as the good v bad vibe system is, I don't hate it, lol) to avoid one of the Saren fights, ngl. And the er, "second fight" with Sovereign-Saren.... hell yeah
... I'll admit I had to double check my choice re whether to save the Council. I did in the end, but I swear, sometimes the way they phrase things I'm like ".... okay but Garrus is right, defeating Sovereign is more important than these few leaders??????" woops. Listen, priorities, is all I'm saying..... (￣ヮ￣|||)ゞ
'Course later they emphasize (in ME2) that there were 10,000 people on that same ship and I was like well I wouldn't have second guessed if I'd known that, I mean c'mon-
Also I did indeed romance Liara in this one, so I got that scene ;Dc But,,,, I also knew by the end that I was totally gonna romance Garrus in 2 since he's an option then finally,,,,, lemme tell you the guilt as I waffled over whether to romance Liara bc of it. hahaha.
Aaaaand Mass Effect 2-
So I'm only up to right before the Reaper IFF Mission, so I don't know the ending, etc etc lol. That said, I've just finished every side mission I've found with the exception of the Shadowbroker Quest and the Arrival Quest (I've heard the latter basically leads into ME3, and the former is best either right before the Omega 4 jump or in postgame).
So from the start - fuck yeah fuck yeah what a high adrenaline start Shepard noooooo but also yes save Joker aH-
The motion comic too hot damn nice job
I loved this setup, seriously - especially forcing Shep into this situation, having to work with/for Cerberus, and the compelling reasoning given behind "why" they do what they do (I especially found it a good point that the Salarians have the Task Force, the Asaris the Commandos, the Turians the- etc... like, true, when you put it like that, having a similar group advancing human interests/solving human interstellar problems is pretty reasonable...). That said, I love too that it really isn't shied away from how Cerberus is nonetheless fucked up - or its at least done fucked up stuff.
Listen, I still think some messed up stuff is gonna be revealed in 2's endgame......... after that Horizon mission and the Collector's ship???? TIM I SEE YOU YOU SHADY MF-
aaanyways lol...
I'm so so glad on a gameplay level they nixed the Mako style exploration. A few Hammerhead missions are fine and a lot more focused than the slippery ass navigation in that glorified ATV, pfff. The probes are a neat way of getting after similar resources - and more importantly, having good levels and some good hubs (the Zakera Wards, Omega, Ilium, etc) is way way more fun than having a more 'sprawling' space that is.... a lot of empty nonsense, lol.
Then there's the fact that we get Joker right off the bat and you can interact with him so much - and him and EDI??? Get out gods I love them. Kasumi is so right when she says they sound like a bickering old married couple lol. I have a terrible feeling that some shit is gonna happen with EDI..... but I don't think she's evil as-is, at least.
Side-eying the hell out of those "access forbidden" parts of her that she doesn't even know.... and the fact that her AI core has a locked door access................... something's gonna happen gdi LEAVE OUR ADOPTED AI ALONE.
(Also Joker pls stop fracturing your thumb on the mute button)
Also please save me there are so many hot aliens in this game,,,,, the xeno/monsterfuckers really comin' through strong in the sequels............... doin' the lord's work........................................
In general, I love how many levels ME stepped up in two with complexity and interwoven narratives!! Like, to the point it'd be almost a drag to replay ME1, even though it was fun going through it (if occasionally a bit tedious with the cookie cutter rando planet science/mine facilities, lol). Like, just from how fun and interesting ME2 is, mostly! more of all the pre-introduced races, plus new ones, plus more filling in of intragalactic politics, and more interesting implications of all these space-faring races mixing....
Also gods WREX and his planet holy shit,,,,, fuckin' hell yeah my man get their shit together and also adopt Grunt yes good-
And Mordin??? My singing semi-evil scientist best friend forced to confront his choices more than he thought he ever would have???? With some of the best ongoing general report chatter of all the companions??
(when I tell you I choked on my coffee when I talked to him after confirming romance choice w/ Garrus and that 'pamphlet' and 'anaphalactic shot if ingesting-' kajsldkfjsldfjk)
Like, fuck, the fact that they actually dive into the mixed morality and horrors of the genophage, and you can confront Mordin on it, for good reason, yet he still stands his ground, until finally some bits of his loyalty mission seem to... affect him, and I'm guessing might set up things for 3 with him? Unsure, but either way, damn, the fact that they start to dig into it...
And Taliiiii my beloved forbidden alien wife TwT her loyalty mission was SO GOOD. I love how varied they all are?? Getting to defend her and discover what she'd unwittingly been a part of-!!
Zaeed is a bastard but tbh I love that he is and that he's unapologetic in him - and Kasumi omg, best thief. A heist?? Gods, yes- I love our couch lounge chats XD
Samara is..... illegally.......... she's an illegally powerful and beautiful and eloquent MILF...........................
(.... listen I'm sapphic as hell and I'm kicking my own ass for picking her up last aksjdlfksjdfl - but her loyalty mission, damn. And seeing how there's this interesting cultural subset, and the struggle with the Asari in that they unquestioningly accept/respect justicars, but also know that the impact outside their culture is a diplomacy nightmare waiting to happen-)
,.,,,,,T,,, Thane,,,,,
I am weak for morally implicated murder dads okay?? And that voice??? His mannerisms?????? How you first see him, and that prayer after assassinating her...???????? And his history/his people's history with the hanar, gods I love how messy it is, it feels so much more real!
Also Jack is a mess and I love her (and want to get her some therapy, omg), and her and Miranda nearly duking it out after you've done both their loyalty missions??? so good and makes a lot of sense-! Honestly I would love more interactions between teammates on the ship, but there's already so much the devs had to balance I can't blame 'em for minimizing, heh. But suffice to say I also love Miranda and Jacob, even if I'm softest for my alien crew XD Hell yeah Jacob, we'll get loud and spill drinks on the citadel indeed TwT
.... I could write a whole essay on how much I love Garrus oTL Perhaps because he and Tali are the throughlines from 1 on your 2 crew, I have some of the strongest feelings about them... but genuinely, he was one of my favorite companions in the first game, and how you find him as Archangel in two? Getting to help him fight his way out after he's gone nearly 48 hours straight fighting off three gangs alone, jfc. His vengeance quest and what can happen there.... That line? fuck me, that line -
It's so much easier to see the world in black and white. Grey? I don't know what to do with gray...
How DARE you come for my heart like this, devs holy shit
(also, some other choice faves so far from the series from him include We can disobey suicidal orders?? and This wasn't in my training manual... [in 1, if you have him with you @ th Thorian fight] and his whole.... pop the heat sink - in his romance ;Dc)
asdasdfksadjfkl like I said I can write an essay on him PFFF suffice to say I'm very looking forward to his romance scene and where things go in 3
But yeah gods I'm just gonna keep rambling if I'm not careful lol. Gods I don't even know what to talk about it's all so good and while I can understand people roasting the obviousness of Paragon V Renegade (v neutral) choices/alignments, I think they do a pretty damn good job in 2 of pushing it further - to the point that there were some times that I accidentally got renegade points and I wasn't that mad, haha. There's so much fun in the interactions that I just have a good time anyways~
I have so many thoughts about TIM (The Illusive Man) and Cerberus.... theories evolving galore............... and like, what the hell!! Omega 4 going to the center of the galaxy is such a cool twist, goddamn - though my heart still breaks at losing Kaiden (his line if you haven't romanced him?? about feeling like he lost a limb when he lost you??? holy shit.... but I also can't blame him for not trusting Cerberus to the point of it affecting his ability to trust Shepard... like fuck Shep go after himmmm) I'm really excited to see where that goes since he comes back in 3, and what the fuck happens with Cerberus bc while I love the fact that obviously there are a lot of people in it for the right reasons, doing good work, there are those that are doing the opposite, and I have a very bad feeling about where TIM will end up landing....
All that said though I need to do the Reaper IFF mission (where I'm lightly spoiled as to getting That Boy, but not how/what happens to make it so - just that it's apparently wise to have all your side missions done before getting him...) and the actual Omega 4 jump. So we'll see what happens and what I think about it from there heheh!
.... major kudos and genuine props if you made it here to the end, I am so sorry for not editing on condensing all this, and appreciate you so much ;w;
#night answers#night plays ME#(yes that's a purposeful pun lol)#((i sure have played myself by starting this series its so good aksdjflskjfd))
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Thinking 'Bout You
Summary: a fic inspired by this song. What if Kim moved to San Diego with Roman?
It had been almost half a year since Kim moved to San Diego with Roman. At first she loved the idea because she was in a relationship with a man she loved and was starting over in a new city with no reminders of her ex-fíance. But the relationship lasted only 3 months in the new city after she realized what a jackass Roman was when he drunkenly admitted one night to purposely screwing with her and Adam's relationship because he just wanted to sleep with her.
She missed her friends, her coworkers, patrolling the streets of Chicago, the wind off of the lake, and even though she wouldn't admit it to anyone who'd ask, she missed Adam. The only contact she had with her old life was occasional texts to and from her first partner, Kevin. It took her an entire month to tell Kevin her and Roman broke up because she was afraid to admit she made the wrong decision so soon and that he'd judge her for it.
I messed up. was the text she sent to Kevin.
With Ruz or Roman?
Adam.
Call him.
Kim didn't need Kevin to tell her that. She's thought about calling Adam everyday since the break-up, hell since the first day she arrived in San Diego. But she's the one who ended things, who gave back the ring, all because of her jealous partner who couldn't watch her be happy with someone else. She knew Adam was an amazing guy and some lucky girl was probably already dating him. She had drafted many texts to him, but they never got sent including a happy birthday one, but she just wasn't ready to admit her mistake.
Meanwhile back in Chicago, Intelligence was down a member after Antonio left and everyone knew that spot would've gone to Kim, but she was no longer there. Detective Hailey Upton was brought in and Voight mixed up the partnerships, putting her and Adam together. On the outside, it looked like Adam was holding it together ever since him and Kim broke up and she moved away, but he was falling apart inside. Kevin and Jay tried to get him to join them at Molly's a couple times a week, but Adam always refused. He wasn't in the mood to laugh or have a good time while dealing with a broken heart. Adam had brought up Kim's contact information so many times he lost count, but he could never go through with hitting the call button, not even on his drunkest nights. He was too stubborn and too full of pride to go crawling back to her even though she was still the last thing he thought about at night.
An undercover gig popped up on Voight's radar and he asked the unit for any volunteers. Adam immediately jumped at the opportunity. "I'll go boss." Maybe this would take his mind off Kim, get out of the building where so many of his good and bad memories with her happened. "It's yours Ruzek," Voight said.
Two weeks had passed since Adam went undercover when Jay received a call from his brother at Med. "Jay, Ruzek just stumbled in here with a bullet wound to his left shoulder."
"What's his status, Will?"
"He's ok. Lost a lot of blood, but he's stable. The bullet just missed hitting the bone."
"Ok, we're on our way." Jay rounded up the rest of Intelligence and they all headed to the hospital.
Adam barely remembered what happened, but it was a drug deal gone bad and somehow he had worked up enough energy to walk his way to the hospital. Now, he was lying in an uncomfortable hospital bed, on pain meds, and the only thing he could think about was Kim. What if he had died without her knowing that he was sorry for how things ended and how much he still loved her. He reached for his UC phone and started dialing the 10 digit number he still knew by heart, but then his nurse appeared with some familiar faces.
"Geez Ruzek, did you miss us so much you had to get shot before your assignment ended," Al joked.
"Haha very funny, Al." The team took turns giving Adam a hug and saying how glad they were he was going to be ok.
Dr. Halstead interrupted the reunions, "Adam, you're going to need to stay overnight for a few days, but then you can go home and recover. I recommend 2 weeks off of work and then you can return to desk duty. After that we'll do another check-up and see where you're at." Adam knew it was coming, but he still rolled his eyes.
"Thanks for coming guys, but I think it's best I get some sleep." Kevin handed Adam over his regular cellphone and mouthed "call her" before walking out the door. Kevin hated being the middle man between his two friends, but he just wanted them back together and knew how they each felt about the other.
That night before bed, Kev texted Kim - Adam was shot today on an UC assignment. He lost a lot of blood, but he's gonna be ok.
OMG Kev. How is he doing really?
Just call him Burgess. You know you want to.
Kim couldn't believe it. Adam was shot and she couldn't help but think it was her fault. Maybe if she wouldn't have broken up with him, dated Roman, or moved away, he wouldn't have put himself in this situation. What would she even say if she called him. Sorry didn't feel like enough she thought. She mulled over it for the next 3 days until she decided to just go for it.
It was Adam's first night back home and Kevin and Hailey had come over to help him get situated along with some pizza and beer. Adam's phone buzzed on the table and a familiar, but unexpected name popped up on the screen. Kim. He couldn't believe it. He picked up after only the first ring. "Hey stranger." Crap, Adam thought. He should've let it ring a couple times and not make it seem like he was desperate and longing for her call. And stranger? Really? He thought long and hard about what he wanted to say to Kim when they talked again and that was not it.
"Hi Adam. I know it's been a long time, but I heard you got shot and I just wanted to make sure you were ok."
"I'm doing ok. It hurts, but I'm home now and resting up until I can go back to work. How are you? How's San Diego?" He refused to ask how things were with the piece of shit Roman.
"G..g...good," Kim stumbled as she didn't want to say she ended things with Roman just yet. "Adam, I'm s..," she trailed off as she heard a female laughing in the background. "Oh am I interrupting you on a date?"
"Haha no," Adam chuckled. "That's my new partner, Hailey Upton. She replaced Antonio."
"Adam, you don't have to hide things from me. You can date whoever you want." Kim was trying to keep it together, but she wasn't shocked he had already moved on.
"Kim, I'm serious. She's just my partner. I wouldn't lie to you."
"Uh sorry, I gotta go. Sean just got home and we have dinner plans. I'm glad you're doing ok though. Bye." Kim hoped he hadn't heard her breaking down because tears were streaming down her face before she hung up. Why didn't Kevin tell her Adam had started dating? That would've been helpful information.
Why didn't you tell me he was dating? Kim texted Kev.
He's not Burgess. She really is just his partner. If you want the truth, he's still hung up on you.
Shit. Not only did she mess things up with their engagement and when she moved away and cut off all contact with him, but now again. Tonight of all nights, after he had just been shot a few days ago. How would he ever forgive her.
The two week recovery period for Adam had passed and he was so eager to get back to work, even if it was just desk duty at first. He needed something to keep him busy and his mind off of Kim and that awkward last conversation over the phone. To Adam's surprise, the day absolutely flew by and he was exhausted. Who knew you could get so tired just answering phones and doing computer work all day, but he had to get back in the swing of things.
"Ruz, you coming to Molly's tonight?"
"Yeah Kev, I'll meet you there!"
Adam packed up his stuff and headed down the steps and out into the parking lot. He noticed a shadow hovering over by his driver's side door. It was dark and he couldn't make out who it was at first. Was it someone coming to finish the job from his UC gig? As he got closer, he recognized that smile and the long brown hair.
"Hey Adam."
"What are you doing here? Where's Roman?"
"We broke up, almost 2 months ago."
Adam bit his tongue to prevent the biggest smile he wanted to appear on his face. "Oh, but you said just two weeks ago..."
"I know, I lied because I thought you were dating someone and I couldn't bear the thought of you being with someone else and didn't want you to think I was alone."
"I haven't even thought of dating someone since that day in the locker room. But Kim, you broke things off. You're the one who moved on first."
"It was a mistake," she muttered as she moved closer to him. "It was all Roman. The push test, everything. He just wanted to be with me. I should've talked to you, my fíance, instead of talking to him. I'm sorry." Kim's eyes quickly filled with water.
Adam was so full of rage at Roman and what he did to screw up the best relationship he ever had, but he could tell Kim was hurting and he didn't want to lash out at her. "Come here," he pleaded as he wrapped her up in a hug. All he wanted to do was feel her lips on his, but it wasn't the right time for that. The smell of her shampoo would have to be enough for now.
"I don't know if you're up for it, but would you want to go to Molly's tonight and catch up with everyone?"
"I'd love that actually," Kim said as she backed away from his grace with a slight grin on her face.
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