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holylulusworld · 8 months

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Big girls don't cry (2)

Summary: You are no stranger to heartbreak.

Pairing: CEO!Steve Rogers x Plussized!Reader

Warnings: angst, strong reader, mentions of former heartbreak, arguments, heartbreak, almost violence

Big girls don’t cry masterlist

<< Part 1

Steve’s whole world just exploded. His life lies in shambles because of one stupid mistake.

After he lied to his friends to make them shut up, he lost you. And now, the chairman of his company is yelling at him. But Steve doesn’t care.

He can only think of you, the only woman he ever truly loved. You didn’t answer his calls and sent the roses he ordered for you right back.

“I told you that I don’t want to use my girlfriend to get closer to Harlan Thrombey,” Steve yells back. “You pressured me into meeting her grandmother to charm her. Now my girlfriend hates me, and Harlan Thrombey will never agree to sell his company to you.”

“Mr. Rogers, must I remind you that your position and fate are in my hands?” Alexander Pierce sneers at Steve. He cannot employ someone weak who puts feelings first. “Do still want your job, or is some pussy more important to you? Did that chubby bitch cloud your mind—”

Alexander Pierce doesn’t know what hit him when he ends up on the ground. His nose was broken, and more so his pride.

“Fuck this job,” Steve looks down at Alexander, the man he used to admire. “I can’t do this job anymore. And I won’t. I hate my job, and I hate what you made me do. So many jobs…no not only jobs but lives ruined because of your greed. I’m out of this!”

Steve storms out of the office, cursing himself for ever wanting to follow in Pierce’s footsteps. He’s not the same man he was six months ago. No. You’ve changed his whole life for the better.

“I need to get her back,” he decides there and then to not give up until you are back in his arms.

“Babydoll, I know you are in there!” Steve rams his fist into your door. “Please, I fucked up big time. But I love you, Y/N. Please…I need you.”

“Eat shit,” you yell from inside your penthouse. He can rot in hell for what he did to you. “Get away from my door or I swear you will taste my baseball bat today.”

“I won’t go. If I must, I’ll camp outside your home. It’s cozy out here,” Steve tries to sound confident. “I got food, and sweets, and a soft blanket.”

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” you open the door size Steve up. He looks like he hasn’t slept for days. His hair is a mess, and the suit he’s wearing has seen better days. “Get away from me and my home. There is nothing left to say.”

“I didn’t go out with you to get in your grandma’s good graces. I swear, until my boss brought it up, I didn’t know she was friends with Harlan Thrombey. I refused to use my relationship to get the deal.”

“You know, out of all the shitty guys I met in my life, you are the worst. At least the others had the guts to tell me that they only used me. They never spoke about love,” you huff when Steve dares to take one step toward you.

“I love you, please,” he tries but you shove him away. “Y/N, it was stupid of me to say those things to get Bucky to leave. I swear on my mom’s grave, it’s not true. You mean the world to me.”

“If you don’t want me to break your dick with my baseball bat, you get out of my sight Rogers,” you point at his crotch. “It’s a nice dick, and it’d be a shame if he gets damaged because of the asshole carrying him between his legs.”

Steve would laugh about the way you talk about his cock. Sadly, you are dead serious about hurting him. “Please give me five minutes, baby doll.”

“The fuck no,” you shake your head. “I’ve got no time to waste on a man using me to make even more money. Where everyone has a heart, you’ve got a cold and rotten lump in your chest.”

“I quit my job.” Steve reaches out for you. “I never wanted to hurt you or use you. I swear this is all a misunderstanding. Bucky was nagging, and I wanted him to stop making fun of me for being in love.”

“You mean for being in love with the fat girl,” you snap at Steve. “I heard all of this before. You’re nice, and your face is pretty for a fat girl. If only you’d lose some weight we could be more than friends.”

“Whoa, baby! Where is this coming from?” Steve raises his hands in surrender. “Bucky is not that kind of guy, neither am I. I love you for yourself. Your size never mattered to me…or it does because damn, do you know how I love burying my face between your tits? You are perfect the way you are.”

How you wish Steve’s words were true. You know better than trusting a man with your heart. “No, I’m not. Not to you and the likes of you.” You shrug. “It’s fine. Not everyone can handle a woman like me. The difference is, you pretend to like, no love me, for a deal.”

“No-“ he sniffs. “Can we not talk, doll? Did you even listen? I quit my job and hit my boss for you.”

“Sure,” you sneer. “I want you to leave and never come back. If I see your face around here ever again, you will regret your birth.”

You slam the door in his face, locking it. No man breaks your heart and gets away with it. If he won’t leave you alone, you’ll make sure that he regrets messing with you…

>> Part 3

Tags in reblog.

#Big girls don't cry (2)#steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #ceo!steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x y/n #angst

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dalchiid · 7 months

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𝕮𝖔𝖛𝖊𝖙𝖔𝖚𝖘 𝕬𝖑𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖓𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝕰𝖓𝖉𝖎𝖓𝖌 - 𝕹𝖆𝖒𝖏𝖔𝖔𝖓

Namjoon played with your heart and subsequently broke it. He's done toying with you but what happens when he realizes he wants more from you than he originally thought?

Pairing: Yandere Vampire Namjoon x Fem/AFAB Reader

Word Count: 3,211

Warnings: Yandere, Possessive, Obsession, Fear, Choking, Mention of Necrophilia

I do not condone the behavior being exhibited in my work. This is solely for entertainment purposes and I hope if any of you are ever in a situation like this that you have the chance and ability to run away from it. Take care out there.

DO NOT copy, edit, or repost my work anywhere.

A/N: After being requested here's an alternate ending to Covetous! When Namjoon decides you're just too good to pass up.

He doesn't know when this started to happen. You were fun to play with but that was it. You were a toy he could really give two shits about but for some reason when he sees you kissing his brother it sparks something within him.

It starts off with curiosity. He knows you don't actually love Hoseok. You were just toying with him the way he did to you. It's so obvious to him but Hoseok is so in love with you that he couldn't see it.

Namjoon tells Seokjin that he suspected that you were lying and he gave his reasons why. He told his older brother everything. Well, almost everything. He didn't tell him how on multiple occasions he'd been knuckles deep inside of you pulling from you the sweetest sounds he's ever heard. But he does mention how you fell for him all because he was nice to you. It leaves the man flabbergasted and because of Namjoon's constant lying it took the eldest a minute to believe him.

Namjoon is known for lying. It's what he's best at but when he showed concern for Hoseok's feelings Seokjin couldn't help but to believe him when he said you were lying yourself. Now that he had one brother on his side that meant when he told Hoseok about your lies and you wanting to escape he'll believe you. Or better yet he tried but you had Hoseok too wrapped around your finger.

He doesn't know what pisses him off more that Hoseok didn't believe him or because you no longer were entertaining him but his brother. When he had you you were nothing to him but now that he doesn't anymore you're the first thing to come to mind when he starts his day.

To be honest he's upset you managed to reign him in. Nothing regarding love was supposed to happen between you two. He remembers how hard he laughed when you told him you loved him. He got a good laugh out of it. When you left his room he decided that what he had with you was a good run but it's over now. He'll mess with you from time to time because seeing that heart wrenching look you'd throw his way was funny but now he's laughing no longer.

When he saw the way you leaned in to kiss Hoseok on Jimin's birthday it lit something inside of him. He was interested at first when you and Hoseok would hole yourselves up in his room doing gods know what. When he realized you were "succumbing" to his brother - Seokjin's words not his - he realized having you around wasn't so bad. But that damned kiss you gave Hoseok in front of him had him hollowing his cheeks and jutting his chin out in annoyance.

Gods you really piss him off.

He wishes things were different. That he wouldn't have these feelings but alas he does and he's come to realize that he actually wants you and not in the way he did before.

When you left Hoseok was devastated. Namjoon was upset that you would leave but he doesn't know if he's upset because you broke his brother's heart or because you left without him being able to take you as his again. Maybe it's both.

It's been a year since you've been gone and Hoseok is still a mess. He lies in his bed crying out for you and waits for a word to come in from the private investigator he's hired.

He chose well because this investigator has never not found anyone he's sent to search for but Namjoon has a little secret. He made a deal with the man that comes with a hefty amount of cash. The deal is that whatever he finds he needs to run it by Namjoon first and if he finds you don't tell Hoseok.

The investigator was confused at first but money talks and so he kept his promise.

After searching for so long he's come to find out you live about eight hours away from him. Near Hoseok's ex Minjeong of course. It was her who took you under her wing and helped you escape. How she did it he's not sure but you're there and you have a full time job now. The last time the investigator saw you you were leaving the rehab center you were taken to after your escape and he's come to learn that you're clean now. He doesn't know how much you struggled to get better but you did and it honestly makes him smile. Not because he's happy for you but because it's going to make breaking you so much fun.

He's currently snooping around your apartment. It smells just like you and he finds that he likes it. You don't have any pictures up and your furniture is bland. He doesn't know if it's because you have zero taste or because you don't plan on leaving a mark. That's good enough for him because he has plans for you that don't require whatever it is you have going on here.

Time gets later and later until the sky begins to dim. By now you should have been home and Namjoon finds himself checking his phone to see the time.

He huffs in annoyance. You're late.

Based on what the investigator said you should be home by 5 PM and it's 7. He wonders what's taking you so long. Are you perhaps with Minjeong? He was told you two actually spend some quality time together. Are you working overtime or are you perhaps with someone else? He hasn't been told that you're seeing anyone romantically or so it's believed. You don't have a lot of friends so despite knowing you're probably not but the idea of you spending your time with someone that isn't him? He has to admit that doesn't sit right in his stomach.

He doesn't own you but he thinks he likes the idea of that. Much more than he originally thought he would.

You were once his brother's but thinking about you and Hoseok right now is actually pissing him off so if you know what's good for you you better be home in the next few minutes.

When he thinks you're going to be later than you already are he hears the front door beep as you put the code in.

He's sat on your dining room chair waiting. From this angle you won't be able to see him. You'd have to come around the corner towards the kitchen that is separated by a wall that's waist height.

He can hear the rustling of bags and how you sigh deeply. From the smell of it he thinks you brought groceries and it would explain why you were late.

The door closes behind you as you make your way over to the kitchen. Your eyes are facing down as you shuffle your way over. You look cute as you waddle over in your house slippers. He can't believe how absolutely clueless you are though and he decides to say something so that you can finally acknowledge his presence.

"Took you long enough."

The gasp you take is loud as you drop your grocery bags in a fright. Your eyes are wide as you back up with a hand to your chest. It makes him smile.

He stands to his full height and shoves his hands into the pockets of his loose pants. When he tries to take a step closer to you you take two steps back.

"What the fuck are you doing here?!"

Your question makes him chuckle.

"It's been a while, princess."

You're visibly shaking with your eyes growing glossy with unshed tears. He watches as you back up against the wall of your living room and it just makes his smile grow wider.

"Namjoon," you cry. "What are you doing here?"

He hums as he steps closer your way. "Am I not allowed to see my favorite girl?"

Your face morphs into one of disgust but the fear is still evident in your expression. "Please. Please don't take me back."

He grows closer to you until he's directly in front of you nearly chest to chest.

If the wall could swallow you from how hard you press into it he thinks it would and he has to admit seeing you so frightened really is doing something for him. Something good.

His hand comes up to caress your cheek to which you flinch. It makes him chuckle.

"Who says I'm taking you back, princess?"

Your brows furrow as confusion becomes evident in your features.

"T-Then why are you here?"

He breathes out deeply as he brings his face closer to yours where he runs his lips across your forehead. He can hear the way your heart rate skyrockets and feel the way you tremble beneath his touch.

He expected your response to seeing him again would be less than pleasant but he has to admit that he's enjoying it. What can he say? His princess is quite entertaining.

You jerk your head back when you feel his lips on your skin and bang the back of it against the wall. You wince from the sudden pain. Namjoon seems to notice because he gives a low chuckle as he pulls back a little so he can stare directly into your face.

"It's been so long since I've last seen you. Since I last smelled you. I wonder if you still taste the same." A smile overtakes his lips.

With a courageous front he's never seen from you before you push back against his chest. He barely budges but you made your point.

"Aw," he says. "Aren't you happy to see me, princess?"

"Fuck you, Namjoon," you cry out.

"Isn't that what you wanted? For me to fuck you?" His smile grows wider. "You know as lovers do? We were pretty close to that weren't we? But we had some issues and my brother got to see sides of you that I didn't." He looks up towards the ceiling as a thought strikes him. "I still remember when I nearly cockblocked my brother who was doing something filthy with you. Do you remember?" He grabs your face between his thumb and fingers forcing your lips to pucker up. "It had something to do with these lips. Tell me are you any good at giving head in the way you were with those pretty hands of yours?"

There's a tear that's been threatening to spill from your right eye. It clung to your lashes like a lifeline until it couldn't anymore and fell down in a streak of anguish and, does he detect, embarrassment?

"Don't get so shy on me now, princess. It is what it is." He shrugs. "Knowing then what I know now maybe I should've just knocked the damn door down and taken you for myself."

You look utterly confused and try to speak between two squished cheeks. "What are you going on about?"

Namjoon huffs a laugh. "I mean baby girl that you just had to mean something to me." He suddenly grows serious and it unnerves you. Squeezing your face tighter with his nails digging in he grits out "You just had to make me fall for you."

When the realization hits it hits you hard because you release a shaky breath with a shake of your head in disbelief.

"No," you say. "You didn't want me. I was nothing to you."

"And you're right. You weren't shit to me but it seems after some time passed things changed. After seeing you kiss my brother and fucking mean it it set something off in me. I hated it. I hated you and I hated my brother for getting to have you in ways I could only dream of." He smiles. "People change is what I'm saying, princess. I changed and now I want you."

Nothing is making sense to you so you continue to shake your head no. "Hoseok wouldn't allow it."

Namjoon snarls. "I don't give a fuck what my brother wants. You're mine now."

"And why would I ever pick you?" Heat is seethed between your teeth.

"Who says you had a choice?"

There's a moment of silence as he stares at you. You stare back confidently but only because you can hardly see him through all the tears that are waiting to be shed. Through that confidence you bite back.

"Hoseok would kill you if you touch me."

His hand leaves your face and grips your neck tightly but not enough to block your airways.

"And I'll kill you if he tries to touch me and I'll turn you into my little cock sleeve just like Jimin does."

Your eyes widen and it feels Iike there's too much air in your chest from when you gasped. Your knees are threatening to give out but don't worry Namjoon thinks. You have him.

You shake your head despite how scared you feel. "No. You're a liar. You'll never do that."

To this Namjoon laughs out loud. Like what you told him was a hilarious joke. Maybe it has to do with the fact that he is a liar. Always has been and always will be, but you're right. He'll never do that to you.

His thumb smooths over your neck as he sobers up.

You look beautiful. Maybe it's because it's been a long time since he last saw you. He's not sure but what he does know is that now that he has you he won't give you up so easily.

His thumb continues to rub softly against your neck. You're still trembling and it's probably because he still has a good hold on you. Your eyes shift from his face to around him like you're looking for something to defend yourself with.

"Don't think about it," he warns.

But you do and it's with a sudden movement do you bend your knee fast and hard into his groin. Namjoon doubles over with his hold on your neck loosening. You go around him and run to your door. You're about to open it and scream but a hand wraps over your mouth and drags you backwards until you trip and land flat on your back. Namjoon comes tumbling after when you grab his shirt when he whirls you around and lands on top of your lap. His hand is still on your mouth and it covers the screaming cries you let loose.

Your hands do a poor job at hitting him hard and despite how annoyed he is with you right now he can't help but to huff a laugh.

"You're a lot more spicier than I remember." He straddles you and stiffens when you land a good slap across his face. With his other hand he grabs your two and slams them on the floor up above your head. "Don't piss me off," he grits out.

Tears fall freely from your eyes as your muffled cries ring out in the air. You try to say something but he can't hear you over his hand.

"What's that," he asks.

It's almost like he's playing around with you because he smirks.

You try and speak again but this time he removes his hand from you and lets you talk.

"You're a piece of shit," you cry.

Namjoon grabs his chest. "You wound me, princess." He begins to laugh and it reminds you of the day when he broke your heart. "Now." He sits up straighter. "What you just did? Don't do that shit again. Otherwise I'll have to break your legs. Do you want that?"

It takes you a second as your bottom lip trembles.

"Y/N," he calls to you sternly.

Slowly you begin to shake your head no.

"Good."

All that's heard are your sniffles as you try and reign in your loud crying.

Honestly he doesn't like seeing you cry. Fear is one thing but the way your face scrunches up so pitifully turns him off.

You hiccup a little and mumble something he doesn't quite catch.

"Come again?" He leans a little towards you.

You hiccup again and frown as you speak a little louder. "You're worse than Hoseok."

Namjoon grits his teeth as a fire begins to roar within him. This time when he grabs your neck he squeezes tight and it makes you gasp in air that can't reach your lungs.

"Say Hoseok's name one more time. I dare you." He's finally come to realize that he hates the way his brother's name falls from your lips. "I told you you're mine."

Your hands come up and claw at his one. You keep trying to gasp for air but it doesn't come. When you think you're about to pass out he releases you and finally those gasps of air are fruitful.

You cough a few times as your chest rises and falls dramatically. You're back to shaking like a leaf making Namjoon sigh.

"Come on," he says as he stands up and reaches a hand out. "Let's go."

You're hesitant to take his hand before deciding to stand up on your own. You take a few steps back that makes him arch a brow.

"Go where?" Your voice is a little hoarse.

He drops his hand to his side before he decides holding your hand is the better option. He snatches it and you try to tug away but ultimately stop when you realize he won't let go.

"We're going home," he says lowly.

He sees the way panic begins to take over your face and it makes him smile.

"You said you weren't going to take me back."

"And I meant that," he chuckles. "We're going to a new place I got. Just for us."

"What?"

You look surprised. He can't help but to laugh. You're too cute for your own good.

He turns and drags you along with him towards the front door. This time instead of going to it you plant your feet hard towards the ground but your slippers make you slide forward.

"Namjoon," you cry out. "Namjoon wait!"

He stops to hear you out but when you say nothing he tugs you forward again.

As he goes to open the door he brings you in close and mutters "Make a sound and I'll kill anyone who comes to your aid. Understood?"

Your brows draw together but he sees the realization behind your eyes. He sees that you come to the conclusion that you have no other choice. And so slowly you begin to move along with him and leave your apartment.

"You're going to love the new place," he says with a smile as you walk towards the elevators. "It's just going to be me and you so you won't have to worry about anyone prying into our business."

When he looks down at you he sees the way fresh tears fall from your eyes.

"None of that anymore." He wipes your face before the doors to the elevator open. "From here on out things are going to be different. It's probably going to take you a while to adjust but you'll see. Everything is going to be alright."

#bts x reader #bts fanfic #bts fic #yandere bts #yandere bts x reader #namjoon x reader #yandere namjoon #yanderebts #btsfanfic #rm #kim namjoon #namjoon #reader #fanfic #reader insert

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notmorbid · 3 months

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some trick.

dialogue prompts from some trick: thirteen stories by helen dewitt.

true wisdom is knowing you don't know.

courage is not being fearless. it's facing your fear.

i know what i want, but i don't know its name.

i don't do this anymore.

i had no idea you were in town.

people think it would be easy to walk away.

you are quite hard to pin down.

my lips are sealed. you know what i think.

the family is a barbarous institution.

it's time for me to take up knitting.

my imaginary friends were all robots.

we're socialized to mug for the camera.

at 3 am, the circumstances seemed to extenuate.

i've never wanted to go to france. i just want to watch french films.

a roommate is an economical substitute for a therapist.

i want a crap-free deal.

it's a wonderful town.

i'm throwing my life away to keep a roof over my shoe collection.

i have an aversion to the wedding march.

we are creatures of a day.

i'm not comfortable mixing business with friendship.

i really don't understand people.

maybe the secret to success is not caring.

it's nice to not have to be cheery and down-to-earth and sensible.

that's a lot more sincerity than i know what to do with.

i'm a very good man, but a very bad wizard.

i was shipwrecked. did i ever tell you that story?

and they say there's no such thing as platonic love.

german never sounds the way it looks.

face to face, some things are impossible to say.

you must allow me to apologize.

i have enough problems without constipating my brain with this crap.

it's not about being a human being. it's about putting on a performance.

i wouldn't normally hit someone your age.

as it says in the song, you don't count your money when you're sitting at the table.

you can't always get what you want.

i thought we were all professionals.

eat your heart out, paul mccartney.

i didn't think it would take so long to get back.

are you ever not philosophical?

they say the camera never lies.

i wonder if the mirror only tells us how we see ourselves.

it's better to bow to the inevitable.

rich people don't care what happens to you.

#rp meme #rp memes #sentence starters #ask memes #inbox memes #ask meme

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lxvenderhxzehv · 7 months

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Hello, its me

A Self para: Teddy and Hope

The Restaurant was fixing to close. Teddy had sent everyone home and was packing up the food that was left over to take home for him a Kirby to eat that night When he heard the bell at the top of the door ring. "were closed!" he shouted from the counter as he wiped it down. It was one of the last things he had to do. When the sound of heels clicking on the hardwood floor came closer he glanced up from his work. Who he saw nearly shook him too his core. "Hope?!

Hope smiled brightly "Theodore Clark Collins...." a giggle followed her words "Well now, I haven't seen you since you were how old? you have grown so much!" He towered over her and boy had he filled in nicely. She could see now why Morgan was hanging around him. Why the gossip column had mentioned him so much as of recently. He was very kind on the eyes and screamed trouble, even if it wasn't on purpose.

"What are you even doing here?" Teddy was even more thankful now that he had sent everyone home. He didn't know the ins and outs of the what Halley knew about her mother. But the last thing he wanted was for her to be upset while at work. "I mean...it's good to see you! but I'm just confused...What happened?"

Hope looked to him a little pout on her face "I felt home sick. You know they say you don't realize you have a good thing until it's gone...New York never felt like home, like Huntsville did" she lied to him. New York had been heaven on earth to her, she was well off, her parents money kept her well taken care of for just long enough till she could find someone to Marry who could cater to he life style. Of course Hope Macgillivray always got what she wanted and like everything else she did. He was a lawyer and a damn good one at that. It helped that his mother was an ex Broadway starlet turned producer and was Hopes in to the big time. The only thing in her way, or so she thought was Hank. But now she was stuck here "I'm still settling in so I was just stopping by the pick up some food on my way home....but I won't trouble you"

Teddy sighed, he didn't believe a word of it but kept his friendly demor all the same. "So, you came back to what?" He questioned "Are you going to try and fix things with Hank and Halley?" He leaned on the the counter and furrowed his brows "If you are I'd appreciated if you don't do it at my restaurant" he grumbled "I just don't want any trouble here..." He grabbed one of the bags he had packed up "Here you can have this, it's on the house...since you didn't know how early we closed..." Hoped nodded "I'm going to try, I can't force my self back in their lives...so at least whatever Halley decides that's what I'll respect..." she nodded "And I know Hank and Morgan are back together....not really surprised though..." She shrugged before glancing up to him with a sly smile "I was surprised to read about you and Morgan though..." her eyes shifted to the food. "oh Teddy you're a sweet heart" The words came out a bit more artificial than she intended.

Teddy leaned back up and crossed his arms. When she was talking about Halley it seemed genuine however when she mentioned Morgan and Hank he suddenly felt a wave of anger push over him and it only got worst when he had mentioned his relationship with Morgan. His already crossed arms tightened. "Were friends yeah, Why dose that matter..." his eyes narrowed at her.

"oh it doesn't, but you're clearly not just friends..." Hope shrugged "Just making a observation from the view of and outsider and you're body language speaks volumes." She chuckled looking him up and down "I just didn't peg you for the type to go for an older woman...."

Teddy felt his cheek flush. Sure he liked Morgan a bit more than he lead on. One of the main reasons he had agreed to an open relationship with Kirby was so that if he wanted to he could still see Morgan and wouldn't be an issue but that didn't matter anymore. "I Have a boyfriend Hope..." He explained then brushed her off "I think you better be heading out now, You have your food and its gonna get dark soon." He handed her the bag "It was good seeing you again but I've gotta get home..." he grabbed his own bag and came from behind the counter. Hope cut him off placing a hand on his chest running her manicured nail a long his chest. He exhaled deeply and rolled his eyes.

"shame" Hope said once again pouting "You seem like a lot of fun now Theodore" She noticed him cringe when she called him that and it made her smile devilishly. "If you're ever looking for a good time yourself, your boyfriend lets you off your leash, or you get bored with whatever game you're playing with Morgan..." She sauntered towards the door then paused to look back at him "Give me a call..." She winked before leaving.

Teddy stood there shocked, he couldn't comprehend what just happened. "Shit...shit shit shit" he knew he had to tell Morgan, this couldn't wait. He radioed Kirby to let them know he wouldn't be at the apartment that night and hopefully catch him before they got too far away from the commune. He ran out of the Restaurant locking the doors behind him and headed to Morgan's house.

#Thread (Teddy and Hope)#Thread (Hope and Teddy)#Self para #long post #tw: long post

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timeoverload · 11 days

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I tried writing last night but I was way too tired and pissed off to do that. I didn't even want to eat dinner last night. I was angry yesterday about a lot of things.

I got to work and the morning team lead was there but he got sent home again by the health nurse. It's good that he left because he sounded horrible. I should have went in early but I was told that he was going to be there so it wasn't necessary. I had to scramble to finish opening decontam and get my stuff set up. My boss was in the department for a little while but then she disappeared when my other co-worker came in. She was not helpful at all while she was there either. I do care about my boss but I am very irritated with her right now. She told me she was going to take instruments down for sharpening and she had to go see how things were going in the basement. She said she wasn't going to be gone very long but she lied. I didn't see her again for hours. She disappears all the time and usually she doesn't communicate. She just tells us to call her if we need something but we still can't always rely on her to show up or do what she says she will do. One of the girls that works in sterile processing in the basement came up to ask if she could have a couple biological packs and some controls. She had been waiting on our boss to bring her some but she didn't hear anything for hours so she came to talk to me. Apparently the boss told her she was going to go help upstairs while she told me that she was going to be in the basement. I was so pissed because she lied to both of us and we were both drowning. I understand that she can't be everywhere at once but she was probably somewhere chatting with someone and drinking coffee because that's usually what she's doing when we can't find her. It wouldn't have been such a big deal if she hadn't told both of us that she was going to help us and then do nothing. I told her how many cases I had and she didn't really care whether I got breakfast or not. She had brought scotcheroos for my other co-workers birthday and she basically said that I would have to eat those if I got hungry. She didn't use those exact words but I think it's fucked up that she couldn't cover for me for 15 minutes so I could go eat. It was nice of her to bring some sweets but I just wanted some real food because I haven't been able to eat breakfast since Monday. She was the only person there that could help me and she knew that. Around noon she came in and asked if I wanted to eat lunch and of course I said yes. She asked my co-worker who comes in at noon to cover for me so that was helpful I guess. I was so hangry all morning. I was so hungry that I bought a sandwich even though I hate their sandwiches. My boss also changed the decontam shift schedule and she put herself in there from 11-12:30 but she didn't come back to the department until noon. My co-worker had been in decontam for 3 hours at that point because she didn't show up to relieve him and I felt bad for him. He was pissed when she finally popped her head through the window to ask him if he wanted her to come back there. He said he didn't want her back there and someone else came in to take over. She shouldn't have put herself on the schedule if she knew she wasn't going to be able to do it. I know she has been sick for a while and it sucks. I do feel bad for her and I want her to be healthy. I really think it's time for her to retire though. I don't think she can handle it anymore and I can tell her heart isn't in it because she used to be very passionate. She doesn't care like she used to. She has definitely changed a lot in 8 years. My whole morning was very chaotic yesterday. I got 23 pans done by myself before noon. They also opened a lot of other sets. It was a lot of work. I was wishing that I could clone myself. I feel like a robot because I do the same shit over and over again. I didn't cry but I wanted to. The afternoon was a little better because I didn't have to move as fast but the last case didn't get done until 4. I had so much stuff to do at the end of the day but I managed to get it done before 5 so that's good.

I left work feeling disgusted and nauseated due to all of the negative energy around me all day. I just wish that I felt like I could fit in. Some people are just so cold and unfriendly. I'm tired of people giving me dirty looks. I have never felt like I belonged there. It is a nightmare and I'm stressed out. I never thought I could develop PTSD from a job and I think it will haunt me even after I leave. I don't want to think about it anymore because I don't want to dwell on it all weekend. I had nightmares about it last night. I'm definitely not looking forward to next week.

I still feel like trash today and I am having horrible cramps too. I managed to get out of bed and get a couple groceries this morning so at least I have something to eat. I don't want to get up now and it sucks because I have so much shit to do. I slept a lot last night but I am still tired. I guess I woke up several times in a panic so that probably didn't help. I think I need to take a nap sometime and maybe I will feel better. I am very happy to be at home and I need to try to enjoy my day.

I hope everyone else is having a good day so far. :) 💖💖💖

#personal

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purplerocker-thesims · 2 months

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Crime Empire - 2 - 3 - A person to rely on

Meredith woke up in a cold sweat, breathing heavy, as her heart and head raised and head raised. The pounding that accompanied her was not only her head that pounded ran through her body, thought her pulse, that it drowned out the sound of her own heartbeat.

A jolt ran through her, shooting her up from her bed, with a rush gasped that through out body. Mind running wild, breathing unstable but all she could grasp was that she couldn't be alone.

Without thinking, Meredith threw herself out of her bed, quickly, dashing out of her room. Down her stairs to the her living space. There was no thought, just do, just pure nerves with her heated blood rushing through her with remanence of fear that spread through every part of her body.

She called the only crazy enough to come over at the hour, Elizabetha, knowing she was always down to pop over for a chat at 4 in the morning. If she was lucky, she would just got back from out partying or something.

The phone rang for a while, before there was an Answer. "hello?"

"Betha! Hey, It's Mer, are you up to anything?" Meredith nervously said. Her body stiffened, once everything became slow, hearing her voice. Thoughts finally kicked in and her nerves slowly simmered down, once she realised what she was doing.

"Hey Mer, why are you up this hour?" Betha's Voice tiredly yawned. What could she even say? She was scared of a silly nightmare? Oh how could she be Scared, she was big bad Meredith. Nothing should instailed such fear in her than that night, that nightmare of the past. Why was she so Frightened by that night? Them. Those men. The Night lurkers. There was no lie that could be worth why she needed someone to talk to and not once has so gone straight to someone before, but this time was different. She couldn't be alone.

Not now.

Not anymore.

"Sleep is overrated," Meredith fear stuck voice let out tight laughter. "I just got done with some work, Would you want come over." She lied but her voice didn't hid that.

"Oh my way." She hummed.

And as soon as Betha got home, Meredith wrapped arms around her, pulling her in for a hug. Her face into her shoulder.

"Thank you for coming here at this hour of the fight,"

"Is everything okay?" Betha rubbed her back, holding her tightly. It was warm and caring, as fear wasn't the reason why she was nice and friendly to her. Betha could never fear her, and had an air of knowing about her. Knowing what? Meredith didn't know but like that about her.

"I don't know why I could you over, I didn't want to be alone, I'm not giving away my home address to someone I didn't trust"

"Darling, We can talk any time about anything. You know that."

Meredith sat on the bed with her bestie, betha, on the bed. "It's not so often, I get a call from the big scary Mer, with her sounding like she just witness a complete mass destruction of her empire." Betha jested, grinning with her eyes side eyes Meredith.

"har har, very funny, It not that bad. It isn't even anything at all. Once again, I am sorry about causing the hassle of dropping by, I don't know what I was thinking, honestly." She down played herself, laughing off sadly. with a small smile that slowly twisted into a frown.

Meredith sighed, frowning. "it's stress of being human and living. the feelings and everything in between. I wish I could just cut it all out and be more like my father..." Her mind went back to the dream, the words others spoke. The years other's doubts, other words that built up over time crowded her mind. She couldn't let the words go even after the years of proving them wrong, they still bombard her mind, 'too weak to be boss' , 'too dependent on others' , 'only got where you are due to family relations' they all held her down. Work consumed her life and the belief that she wasn't keep up with everything, then she'll soon find her end.

"Living is a luxury, is it not?." Betha asked, tilting her head to her with a raised brow. "I mean, having warm blood, passions, dreams and these emotions that let you know, through all of the blood shed and gore, you are still human. You still are you and sadly imposter syndrome is also a part of anything we do in our life."

"Well, The downside likes to bring up the past a lot. 4 years ago. I lost someone close to me. His death was a mystery, his body wasn't found and all the was left at the scene was his blood, unknown blood. I don't remember the attackers, other than. Stupid night workers." "Love is stupid, Don't dwell on dead lovers, when you, my darling, can have anyone."

"Is that why your going on that date with Makoto? Love isn't clearly stupid if you are still having him around and it isn't just for the kind at this point." Meredith hummed, lifted up off her bed, to stench her legs, Betha stood up as well.

"It's weird and complicated." Betha sighed. "The date is this Friday, but I got a gig at this new club, preforming at a grand opening or something tonight, but I saw, your friend, Robin, with the young's heir."

"The Youngs'?" She titled her heard, never hearing any family name of important around these parts.

"In the kingdom of Moonlight falls, where I am from, They're a powerful family, titled and everything. My parents were closely connected with the duke and duchess Young. Most of the upper class were all the same thing, Nightly balls, feasts and mask balls. Riveting stuff."

"How fancy were you?" Meredith laughed.

"I'd advise you to keep away from any of them and there club, it isn't for those that don't know. who knows knows, who don't are what they try and lure in. Keep your business, away from them." She warned her with a rare softness in her eyes.

"I don't know about any club being opened, but I'm sure, there wouldn't be any problems." Until morning, the two women chattered and gossiped, all that helped with Meredith calm down and regain her natural calmness. The nightmare had shrouded into faint memories again, waiting for opportunity to spring again.

To better clear her mind after everything, in the day of light, Meredith changed into her and sports where, preparing for a jog. She stretched her body, passively going through her daily routine. Jog before breakfast, and before going to work with a clear mind than before.

She found a few side task, Who are the Youngs? What is this new club? And why wasn't she not informed about a 'Grand opening'.

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#ts2 #ts2 simblr #ts2 story #thesims2 #ts2 legacy #ts2crimeempire #simblr

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five-20-five · 2 years

Text

That's Why I Gave Up on Music

TL by EJ Translations except *

Ai Nijou

I'm lying in the deep indigo beneath the overpass

I hear a single clap for my blank-page life

I was singing about my own emptiness today, as usual

So things wouldn't change, / I wrote a story starring you in my notebook

My gas and water being cut off, society, and the news are all someone else's problem

Look, my life is like ink

The dream I had when I was young gets closer to its expiration date as I get older

In the distant night sky I looked up at, flowers swam / So many that it could be mistaken for spring

I looked down so I wouldn't trip

Life is made of nothing but compromises

I don't believe in hearts or fate or love songs or life / After all, if you can't sell something it has no value

I intentionally discarded the present I dreamed of, and now I'm lying here waiting for its expiration date

Behind my eyelids, I just, I just saw / An imagined, distant vision of you

In my notebook, flowers swim in the corner of a faded night / One more is in my eye

Life is just one compromise after another / I learned that pretty fast

Elma, it's you / You alone are my music

There are only eighty more characters in this song / Because maybe the only value of a life is in the way it ends

Deep indigo covers my eyes

In the distant sky I looked up at, you are cooling off / As if you were just swimming in the night

Hachigatsu, Nanigashi, Tsukiakari

I don't need anything

My heart became irritated; as I walked, it got hard to breathe

I didn't care anymore about music or life or anything

The number of things that annoyed me just kept increasing

The night wind tickled my nose, and the pain in my heart wasn't real--

I understood that; I pretended to understand that

Everything about me is the worst / I wanted something concrete to remember you by / I don't want to let you become just a memory!

There's no point to just feeling good / Because these lyrics, too, are the worst

If my life could end at twenty-seven, rock and roll saved me / By saying "Stop thinking so much! You'll die anyway"

I don't need anything, even you

I laughed until my throat went dry

The first time I sold my heart / I didn't care anymore if it was pride or heart disease

I bowed my head even to people that annoyed me

You were the only thing shut away inside my heart

Even the blue of the sky is just my imagination

I was smiling; my face just stayed that way

I'm the worst, I'm too arrogant; you're as greedy as anyone else

There's no point in dramatic songs or loves, it just makes you look like a fool

I knew, I knew / Your life was your own / However much I shouted "It's the worst"

Rock 'n' roll flows through the world beyond / While hymns and stuff aren't that popular / Because there's no god

I don't know anything about sins or mistakes or crimes or suicide or wars or minorities

I want to agree with you on everything / But that would be deceiving you, Elma

It's the worst, it's the worst; I can't help this affection / I want to mourn myself in the dramatic night

Your life is moonlight / I could never say it was commonplace

These lyrics that sound nice but mean nothing are the worst

The present, love, the past, dreams, memories, humming, light-colored eyes, night mist, / Tenderness, pain, flowers, melancholy, that summer, this song, / Hypocrisy, the night wind, lies, you, myself, the blue sky--I don't need any of them.

Shikaki to Koohii

In my bare-minium life, in my tiny six-tatami-mat apartment / All I could think about was that I wished I could live with you

If the color of happiness is semi-transparent, then I wish I'd never seen it

Even though I haven't been able to do anything, today comes to an end

Every day I was staring at the ceiling thinking about something

I go scrounging in my blurred thoughts for memories

I've become able to talk about love with cold cynicism / My coffee is always cold, too / I hate it

I don't get it, I don't get it / How can you have become a memory and keep on getting in my way

I don't know / The right way to walk / Or how to say goodbye

If I'm selling my life span, I only have two years left

If that's all that's left, I'd like to go to that town / And spend my remaining life scrounging for memories

How can you have become a memory and keep on showing up in my songs

I don't get how things get forgotten / Or know how to use my time from now on

With my cold, cynical eyes, I was writing a song about you / I'm living my days now for your sake

Look, soon it'll be time for my songs to come to an end / Because it's finally your turn now

You must become a memory, become a song

I don't get, you know, / How is it that people can keep walking / Or how they can act like it's the most natural thing in the world / I don't get it at all

Odorou ze

Ah, with a heart that's clearer than transparent, / I'm laughing at the world

Ah, thinking back to when I chose music / I feel I was such an idiot then

Everything I want to tell you-- / This song, even my voice-- / Has turned into the wind and vanished with the bubbles / So I want to throw away this synesthesia-like sentiment

If it's okay for me to do this, if you want to know, / I won't hide anything anymore / From now on I'll dance just a little

Ah, I want to give up on being human / That's right, nothing holds any interest for me anymore

I want to crush the person I was back then

The summer, the winter--beyond tomorrow / It's all become ash and disappeared in an instant

So I'm throwing away this emotion I lost long ago / If it's okay with you, if you just want to forget

I won't hesitate anymore / I'll dance like this until dawn

Ah, I've given up on music

If I write about you just as you were in my memory, with no changes at all, / Then there won't be a single thing left that I want to do

Nothing comes to mind / Because the days when I knew you are past

If my life now is painful, because I've had enough of the excuses, / Ah, well, I'll dance--look.

It's become the wind, it's vanished with the bubbles

No matter way, I'll throw away this sensation I can't explain

Rokugatsu wa Ameagari no Machi o Kaku

In a daze, I'm watching as / A single drop falls, falls

The shape of my heart is rectangular / It lives only in this sheet of paper

It's all so pointless / It's just stupid / I want to see something that's not rational

Because I'm sure it would be unfortunate only to forget / The strong scent of rain

Trace it with your fingers / Sew it up with words

I pass twilight and turn at the corner, / A one-person parade of footsteps

The clouds that wait for the summer are a misty blue

My life now is i^2 / Subtracting you left me below zero

I can only see you in my memories

Scribbling down even your smiling face / Digging deep into my heart / I knew that it was unconvincing

I wish I could've seen your face / When you read my letters / Written about that summer

Everything's so trivial / Getting involved with others is too much trouble / Even putting my thoughts into words is a pain / In the end, was it always only you?

It's just so stupid / I always knew it wasn't rational

I'm always writing about the rainy town / And the strong scent of rain

Gogatsu wa Hanarokushou no Madoke Kara

In my heart, I felt like / Even the fact that the summer was ending was a figment of my imagination

That summer when I looked up at the sky with you / Was always there above my head

If I don't say anything they'll just disappear / It's just so stupid

Remember! / "I don't remember!" my head was screaming / Then this pain must be in my soul

I can't do anything but force a smile

Even if they laugh at the summer I spent with you / I don't say anything

Don't laugh, our value is self-evident / So then this must be my soul

Though it hurts not to say anything--it's stupid, isn't it? / Hey, answer me!

Unable to answer, I walked alone

And yet, and yet, can't I remember?

Be quiet! I understand now / I can hear your voice saying: / "Remember!"

The pain is proof that you were here

Yorumagai* Tsukiyo Translations

I don't care about singing faithfully or anything / So I want to have it easier in life than anyone else. I don't want to put it any effort

I keep my eyes down when I walk, so I don't know how blue the sky is / I was only looking at your photo

My hollow heart goes walking through the town at sunset

Every life is a machine gun, keep blasting away more and more

You could even rob me of my heart, hey, with just a single, "goodbye"

I want to erase all the sad things / I want to erase the happy things too / I want to erase my heart

You won't need any more than one. I just want to open up a hole

I wish I could erase my needy heart. I don't want to work my part-time job

I keep my eyes down when I speak, so I can't understand people's feelings

In a live music club, I'm singing faithfully / Having the nerve to sing songs that won't even bring in any money, I must look so stupid

Sing out every refrain, hey, all from your throat

I want to erase the bittersweet songs, I want to erase the tender songs too / It hurts just to hear them. I don't need any more than one

I want to become a memory that you carry for the rest of your life and beyond, that brings pain just to look at

Just one will do, you won't need any more than one

I want to blow a bullet hole through you

Parade

if there's a heart inside my body, right below my throat, / Then that must be where you are

I've known for a long time / That as I got older I would even forget your face

If the dawn comes like this... / I hope that my memories don't dry out / I hope that I don't lose this song

Don't forget, for just a little longer

I've thought for a long time that / Gods might reside in your fingertips

Since before today, before yesterday, since a long, long time past / I've known that / Inside my body, right below my throat / Are the days when I've only been imitating your song

I hope I don't forget / The temperature of this moment in which you're not here

Elma* raigerei

I know you're lying once again / Elma, but, but, it still hurts

Though it's time to say goodbye / I'll keep singing until the night fades

I feel the morning rays lighting up me and Elma / But, but I'm still sleeping

Walking with flower drops on my face / See, they look like teardrops

There's nothing I can't forgive / Yet, if you're that kind to me...

As it is, in some distant country / You rest in the gaps of a narrow summer

I closed my eyes and ran / On to a road in the moonlight

The word "goodbye" comes as I stare at your face

Both tears and words aren't there / And yet, I know nothing of this deep blue sky / And yet, I know nothing of you or the end

Dakara Boku wa Ongako o Yameta

Under the blue sky, I waited for you

On that breezy afternoon, my imagination escaped the confined of the day

Hey, where do I go from here? / No one has told me how to proceed

I've thought about it, but I still don't understand

I tried to give up piano, but I can't break the habit of playing on my desk

Hey, what will I do in the future? / It shouldn't be music, right?

Even if I drew a single line in my heart / No matter what I did, it wouldn't disappear, even now, so

I'm mistaken / I don't understand, I don't care

Wanting to know what's right or wrong is just a self-preservation instinct

It's your fault I thought that

Just thinking "Someday I'm going to die" makes my chest feel hollow

"What will I do in the future?" / When I grew up I understood / That I'm not going to do anything at all

How do I explain why I hate people who put on happy faces?

It's an inferiority complex haunting my unsatisfied mind like a ghost

Hey, with all your differences, you all are human

When you don't have love or salvation or kindness or a foundation, it feels bad

Feeling pain at something like a love song is a self-preservation instinct

Do I really not care? It's your fault

I've thought about it, but I still don't understand / Why just living is painful / Why you can't make a living from something like music

I don't care if the lyrics or whatever are lazily done

I'm probably not mistaken / I'm sure I'm not mistaken

Not being able to give the right answer is a self-preservation instinct

I don't care, it's your fault

Eve if I had faith in something once / Now the feeling is nothing but garbage

I wrote to you so many times

I didn't care about whether I'd be rich or famous / It's true, it's really true, that's how it was back then / That's why I gave up on music

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jaycewrites-192000 · 3 years

Text

You're Grounded Pt. 2

Summery: Smiley and Angry's little sister is still grounded, only this time...things go differently.

Part One Here

Rating: SFW

Pairing(s): Platonic!Nahoya Kawata x Platonic!Little Sister Reader x Platonic!Souya Kawata

(Still no incest my dudes)

Also spoilers for episode 20-21!!

One week had passed, and ever since you were stuck in your room, only allowed to come out to go to school, to eat, and bathroom breaks. Other than that, no luck getting out from your little prison. And you were warned to not sneak out again, or another week would be added. You didn't bother trying, as much as you hate to admit it, your brothers were smarter than they looked. They knew every move you would make and would do everything in their power to stop you.

However, you were allowed to have your phone back. They were s confident that if you were to try and call for backup, they would stop it from happening. You made the best of it though, at least you had someone to talk to now. Emma wanted an explanation as to where you had disappeared to lately and you told her you were grounded, well, double grounded now. When she asked why, you hesitated to tell her. But you did, after she promised not to tell Smiley and Angry of course. She did say that you should tell them why you started that fight in the first place, but...it was a bit more complicated than that.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

So, here you were, in your room looking blankly at your door. Every now and then Smiley or Angry, or both of them, would come and check to see if you were still there. Speaking of, your door opened, Angry walked in this time. "Right on time, big brother." You mutter, not bothering to look at him. "Smiley had to run out somewhere real quick. So, I'm gonna stay here until he gets back." He leans against the door after he shut it.

"Whatever." You rolled your eyes. The silence between you two was heavy with tension and awkwardness.

"...Sorry about before. But you really shouldn't have tricked us like that." You didn't respond. "Come on. You're acting childish."

"I am a child dummy. And so are you, so stop acting like your our mother." You glared at him. "Oh, and you wanna talk being childish? You two get into fights every fucking day, and you two rarely ever get punished for it! So how come I get double grounded!?"

"You get double grounded for sneaking out. And you shouldn't be getting into fights at all. As for us, it's different." Angry explained as calmly as he could. "That's bullshit and you know it!" You snapped. "You wouldn't be saying any of this if I were in the same gang as you two!"

"You won't be joining any gangs of any kind!" Angry finally snapped back. It was rare that he would ever raise his voice at you, so you were at a loss for words. Once he saw your shocked face he toned it down. "Just...don't do it again. Please Y/n, you shouldn't be fighting."

And then came more silence. You and Angry never liked whenever there would be a fight between all three of you. But tension had build up ever since you got into that stupid fight. And honestly, you knew that it didn't need to happen but after what happened...after what those jackasses said...What choice did you have?

"Why did you do it anyway?" Angry asks, making you look up from your bed. You opened your mouth to answer, but shut it before looking away again. "Does it really matter?" You asked. "It's done. Nothing I can do about it now."

Before Angry could respond, Smiley walked in. "Heeey, she try to get out again?" He asked. "No..." Angry shook his head. "But she's hiding something." You shot him a glare. "Oh, so we're telling lies now?"

"I don't know, are we?" Angry turned to his brother. "When has Y/n ever started a fight? She rarely gets into fights, and normally she isn't the one to start some shit." Smiley nods his head at his brother's words. "That's a good point. So, wanna talk to us like a big girl?"

"No. Get out." You tell them sternly. "Too bad!" Smiley hopped on your bed and sat beside you. "Better start talking sis."

"Or what?" You challenged. Smiley's grin deepened. "Or else your double grounding will turn into a triple grounding." He tells you. "What!? How's that fair!?" Smiley shrugs. "Just is. Now spill." You resisted the urge to slug your annoying peach hair older brother in the jaw before sighing heavily. "You really wanna know? Fine. I started that fight because some asshole was talking shit about you two! Happy?"

Smiley and Angry looked at each other before turning back to you. "You started a fight because of that?" Angry asks. You furrow your brow in frustration. "It's more than that...they called you guys a smiling freak and a whinny crybaby. They also talked shit about Toman. And when I confronted them about it...they said I couldn't do a thing without my brothers there to protect me...that I was just a weak little girl who needed to stay out of other's way...So, I punched their lights out." You didn't notice you were crying until the end of it.

"I wouldn't have hit them if they would have just apologized and kept their mouths shut." You say with a sniffle. It was quiet until Smiley started laughing. "Man! You went and defended ours and Toman's honor? You really are the best little sister." He pets your head. "Huh?" You look up at him confused. "That was nice of you Y/n, but you didn't need to get hurt over us." Angry made his way over to you.

"W-well they were hurt way more than me." You told him. "I handled it didn't I?"

"Yes but, still. You're safety matters to us way more than a few insults thrown at us. Next time that happens, tell us."

"Yeah! We'll beat the fuck out of them so you don't get in trouble like you did." Smiley added. "Don't be like your dumbass older brothers Y/n. You're going places you know? Don't waste it on fighting like a gangster."

"But you guys are in a gang..." You mutter. "Don't get any ideas Y/n." Said Smiley, despite his smile, he was serious. "We wouldn't know what to do if you were hurt or worse. Just be our tough little sis outside of a gang ok?" You pout slightly but nod anyway. You did consider joining Toman, somehow. Your brothers inspired you in more than one way, and being in a gang was one of them. Not just any gang, a real gang. "The new age of delinquents" as Mikey put it.

It sounded so cool when you heard about it, and you wanted so desperately to be by your brothers side when it finally happens. But it wasn't always cool and badass, after Darken nearly dying and Baji's death, it dawned on you just how dangerous joining a gang could be. And Smiley and Angry be damned if they let their little sister be murdered and they couldn't prevent it.

You didn't know Draken and Baji on a personal level like everyone else in Touman did, but they were so kind to you whenever you were around. Baji even joked that you were like Toman's little sister. His death left a hole in the hearts of Toman, including yours...

"I won't get into anymore fights, but you guys have to promise me something too." Smiley and Angry waited for your word. "Promise me...that you'll be careful and promise me, you guys won't leave us like Baji did..."

The next thing you knew, your brothers were enveloping you in their embrace. "And leave you all alone? No way in hell." Smiley said softly. "We're not going anywhere." Said Angry. You sniffled but managed to smile. "Good. I might say I don't want you around, but you guys are all I got. So ignore me whenever I might say it again, ok?"

"Sure thing." Smiley chuckled. "Oh by the way, you're ungrounded."

You perk up. "Double ungrounded?"

"Yep. Double ungrounded. But you better not go start shit with anyone again, got it?"

"Got it." You giggle.

"Good. Now let's get out of here. I bet you're bored right?" Smiley asked as the three of you left your room. "Bored as fuck."

"There's a new arcade that just opened up. Should we go there?" Angry asked. " Hell yeah!" You and Smiley say in unison.

You still have no idea how you got so lucky as to get ungrounded like you did, but you had a feeling your brothers were never going to punish you as harshly as they did before.

Maybe...

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

(So I was thinking of making like a little kawata sister series? Idk how well that would play out or how it will be done/written but yeah, stay tuned if that interests you)

#nahoya kawata x reader #nahoya kawata #souya kawata x reader #souya kawata #smiley x reader #smiley tokyo revengers #angry x reader #angry tokyo revengers #tokyo rev x reader #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers

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johnsamericano · 3 years

Text

𝔖𝔲𝔤𝔞𝔯 ℜ𝔲𝔰𝔥 𝔧.𝔧.𝔥 •3•

I hope this ain't getting shitty. Thank you for reading, sexy people. Send me a message or an ask if you'd like to be added to the tag list.

warnings: hungover jaehyun, age gap, hospitals, nothing too extreme.

sugar rush m.list.

taglist: @thoreeo @trustmahluv @sunny-nyu @nanascupid @silent-potato @painted-hills

Yoonoh woke up on a strange bed, the mattress stiffer than the one he had back home. He refused to open his eyes, fearing that the daylight would worsen his headache.

“Wake up, sunshine.” He groaned, all the memories from the past night hitting him like a truck. “Come on, I made breakfast.”

His eyelids finally fluttered open, frown softening at the sight of you in a messy bun and your cute pajamas.

“How come you look so fresh?” The dark circles under his eyes had deepened in the span of a few hours. Thank God he didn't have to work that day.

“I always look fresh.” You seemed to be more comfortable around him. Perhaps it was because you had to tuck him in last night. “Up.”

You tugged both of his limp hands, forcing him to sit up.

“What did you cook? It smells nice.” He scrunched up his nose like a little kid.

“Eggs, bacon, and hash browns.” Fast as lightning, he got up from bed. On his way to the kitchen, he noticed the blanket hanging from the edge of your sofa. Disappointment pinched his heart.

“Why didn't you sleep with me? You would've been more comfortable.”

You set two plates on the small table, pulling the pan out of the stove to serve them.

“You spread yourself all over the bed as soon as I laid you down.” You lied successfully. You didn’t have the heart to tell him you weren’t that comfortable yet.

You let the pan down on the kitchen counter, taking a seat in front of him.

“Do you still want to visit my father?” Sparkling orbs stared at him timidly, fearing his answer would be negative.

“I mean…” You hummed, trying not to give it as much importance. “I do want to go!” He quickly corrected himself, frantically shaking his hands. “It’s just that I don't want to meet your father like this.” He pointed at his bed hair, which had only become messier since he woke up.

“You’re acting like he's gonna see you.” There was a slight bitterness in your tone, along with a fake grin.

“Alright, let's do this instead...” Yoonoh sat up straight, clearing his throat as if he were about to give a speech. “We’ll have breakfast, you'll shower quickly, and then we’ll drive to my house so I can fix myself. How does that sound?”

“So I'm finally gonna see your mansion? How exciting.” You kicked his leg teasingly under the table, his cheeks inevitably dipping as he tried to suppress a smile. “I bet you have some peacocks in your backyard.”

“And there's also a dolphin in my pool.” He let out a hearty laugh, extending his arm over the table to grab your hand.

His house was most definitely not what you expected.

It was about the size of the one you grew up in, the decoration inside minimalistic. There were no expensive paintings framed with pure gold, only pictures of him and his family. There was a small backyard you could access through the French door in the kitchen. Half of it was occupied by a greenhouse.

“I had to donate the peacocks to the zoo.” He whispered as you looked through the glass door, squeezing your shoulders with his slim fingers.

“What a shame.” Hesitantly, he wrapped both of his limbs around your torso, letting his chin rest stop of your head. Your heartbeat was thumping loudly against your chest. Yoonoh surely felt it but decided not to comment on it.

“There’s a Tv in my room in case you want to watch something while I shower.” A hint of mischief adorned his honey-like voice. “Or you can come in and watch me instead.”

“Stop!” Your elbow connected with his ribs out of pure panic, making him bend in pain with his hands covering the injured spot.

“It was a joke...” He whispered, teeth gritting together.

I made him mad, you thought. Should you escape or face the consequences of his anger? All thoughts erased from your mind as he grabbed your calves, lifting you over his shoulder.

“Put me down!” You hit his back with closed fists, unable to see the expression on his face. “Yoonoh!”

He went up the stairs, proceeding to enter his room and throw you on his bed. Thousands of dirty scenarios crossed your mind before he threw himself on top of you, crushing your bones under his muscular body.

“My...ribs...”

“Oh, sorry, what is that?” To make matters worse, his fingers tickled your sides, provoking a fit of desperate giggles to escape your mouth. “I’m not hearing an apology.”

“Sorry! Sorry!” His hands finally stopped, giving you time to breathe. Nonetheless, he remained laid on your chest, using his forearms to lift his weight. “Aren’t you gonna shower?”

“I like you.”

The confession was so sudden, so raw it took you some time to finally react. But you had no words to give him an answer, instead, you combed your fingers through his long hair, massaging his scalp while waiting for him to speak up again.

“I never thought I'd be feeling more than friendly affection for you. Our agreement doesn't include love, after all. But I've started feeling like a teenager all over again. I can't help but get excited whenever you call me. Do you know how sweet your voice sounds through the phone?” He sighed, discouraged at your lack of response. “I guess you're not there yet.”

Instead of verbally answering, you planted a sweet kiss on his head, right where small, grey hairs had started growing.

“I’m not good with words.”

“That’s alright.” He snuck his hands under your back, holding you tightly as a sudden need to nurture you took over him. The mature image he had of you faded in less than a second, leaving behind a young, troubled woman. “I’ll shower quickly so we can go see your pops. I bet we’ll get along just fine, maybe even go golfing when he wakes up.”

“I forgot you're almost the same age. Creepy.” He smiled, though uneasiness started steering in his guts.

“Does that bother you?” He asked without giving it a second thought.

“I don't know yet.”

(...)

The man with high cheekbones and bruised skin laid limp on the hospital bed. Yoonoh had been working on his case for about a month, yet, it only started feeling real the moment he entered the room.

“This is my dad.” All emotions had escaped your eyes as if your soul wasn't there anymore. Only an empty shell.

“You look so much like him.” he was afraid touching you wouldn't be the right thing to do, so instead, he said: “He seems like a suitable golf buddy.”

Tension finally loosened its grip around his body as you snorted, pigment returning to your cheeks. Finally, he wrapped his hand around yours.

“He will wake up, y/n.”

“He’s taking his sweet time.” You glanced back at the laying figure, skinnier with every day he spent asleep. “I want someone to pay for taking away the last person that loved me.”

The last person that loved you. Would Yoonoh be able to fill that spot? Not yet, probably. He couldn't modify the depth of his feelings, but he could surely give you the vengeance you longed.

“Do you trust me?” With your eyes still glued to your father, you nodded. “Then I can assure you we’ll win the case.”

“I know we will.”

He sat silently with you, holding your hand without saying a word. The smell of alcohol and the beeping noise of machines made him nauseous. He hated hospitals. You noticed the change in his demeanor, his hand becoming cold while holding yours with strength.

“Do you wanna go?”

“No!” He smiled through the pain, scooting his chair closer to lay your hand on his lap.

He wouldn't agree to get his ass off the plastic chair. You had to tell him you were hungry for him to finally stand up, still clutching your hand like your father did when you were still a kid. His parental behavior caused several emotions to stir inside your guts, so mixed up you couldn't quite put a finger on any of them.

“What do you want to eat?” The tension finally left his body once out of the building.

“Soup.” You smiled while swiping your thumb on top of his knuckles. “I know a place, but to be honest, it isn't good. So we can go to the store and get the ingredients to- but you can't cook.”

“I’m up for a cooking lesson if you are.” He wanted to see your pretty smile again. Maybe making a fool of himself would help. “Let’s hit the road.”

“Wow, so cool.”

“I know.”

(...)

“Can you grab that can of chicken broth?” You pointed at the high shelf, letting go of Yoonoh’s hand to allow him to move freely

“I have a better idea.” He dragged you by the arm so you were standing in front of him, trapped between his body and the shelf. “I’ll lift you so you can reach it.” Matching his words, his hands grasped your waist, ready to carry you.

“Stop!” You slapped his hands repeatedly between giggles. Ignoring your complaints, he started lifting you. “Yoonoh!”

“Yoonoh?” A feminine voice had him placing you back on your feet in less than a second.

“Seryeong, I didn't expect to see you here.” His hands remained seated on the curve of your waist.

“Neither did I. I was surprised when Sungchan told me you'd left early yesterday.” She seemed a bit older than you but still younger than the man behind you.

“I had some matters to take care of.” She eyed you from head to toes with a smug grin plastered on her lips. Just by the look of her clothes, you could tell she was as wealthy as Yoonoh. You feared the scene would turn into a tv worthy drama.

“I’ll go get the chicken breast.” You tried escaping his grip, only to be pulled closer to his warmth.

“No need to. It's already inside the cart.”

Why am I so dumb?

“Does your father know about your little girlfriend?” She asked without hesitation.

“I guess.”

“And why didn't he tell me anything?” She cocked an eyebrow, his hands finally loosening around your body and allowing you to move from your position.

“Look, this is something you should talk about with him. Now, if you excuse us...” With a hand on your shoulder, he began pushing the cart to the next aisle, the chicken broth long forgotten.

“Is this some kind of arranged marriage situation?”

“Something like that.” His hands were tense while holding the cart, knuckles turning white from the strength used. “Before you start asking, I'm not really in the mood and I don't want to direct my bad mood toward you. Let's talk about something else, alright?”

Who was that woman that had the power to turn him into a literal raging ball of fire with just a few words?

#nct au #nct imagines #nct ot21 #nct smut #nct x reader #nct #nct scenarios #nct 127 #nct angst #nct jaehyun #nct fluff #nct jung yoonoh

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ekaterinatepes · 3 years

Text

Nothing but the Best

Author’s note: it’s getting interesting here ;) enter prince charming Sugu-kun to save the day.

IX.

https://youtu.be/uhoiqVPmURE

youtube

Satoru was afraid of making a move, least he tipped you over the edge and made you bolt; he didn’t want that. Swallowing hard he looked into your eyes… God… he had missed your beautiful E/C eyes so much. Waking up every morning without you by his side, without you kissing him awake cause he was going to be late for work… again. Your absence had left a literal infinite void in his heart that he was unable to fill.

“I know I don’t deserve anything from you Y/N, but I love you and I cannot give up on us… We said forever when we got married. And I want that… with you” speaking from the heart was not something Satoru ever did. He always preferred to cover any emotions with inappropriate jokes and double entendres. But he knew he couldn’t play his stupid games, not with you and most certainly not now.

You pulled away in that moment, as if his touch was burning you. He allowed it, doing his utmost effort not to pull you back in. His hands itched resting at his sides, missing the warmth of your body.

|||

It was you and me, it seemed to last forever

The way you taste and I still remember… the sounds we made.

|||

“It would have been nice if you felt that way before you decided to ruin this marriage. Where were those promises of forever when you fucked someone else?” You asked piercing his eyes with yours. He cowered under your glare. Satoru had never been on the receiving end of your wrath and now he understood why most people chose (wisely) to not mess with you. Every single one of your words was chosen carefully to cause the most damage. At the same time… what hurt the most was that you were right.

“Leave and don’t ever come back… you and I… are through…” Satoru noticed how you avoided calling him by his name, he hated it. As if uttering his name would leave a bad taste in your mouth “Y/N…” he whispered pleadingly when you took another step away. But this time he didn’t have the courage to stop you as you disappeared inside your apartment and locked the door behind you.

|||

I bet you wish you had me back! Another chance to gain it, just like that. The best you ever had.

|||

Satoru was fucked.

—————

The next morning Suguru’s plane landed. JFK international airport was as busy and chaotic as one would expect. After collecting his luggage he made his way to a cab giving the driver your current address.

He hadn’t been able to sleep a wink during the trip, his mind swarmed with all the possibilities of what could be happening right now. Satoru didn’t play fair and of course… you loved (probably still love) the lucky bastard.

With a sigh he decided to focus instead on the city going by through the cab’s windows. It wasn’t the first time he was in New York and his mind was much more occupied torturing him instead of appreciating the landscape.

After 40 minutes, Geto stood before a very nice and modern building located in the upper east side called Hawthorn Park. You sure knew how to live in luxury. He approached the doorman and let him know his name and that he was here to see Miss Ekaterina Petrova to which the kind looking old man responded by using his intercom to contact you. Geto was soon granted access and guided to the elevator.

The elevator doors opened on the 21st floor, he walked to the door of your apartment which was already open and you were waiting for him. His smile fell once he noticed you have been crying “oh Kitten” dropping his luggage on the spot he surrounded your body in his arms “I’m so sorry…” one didn’t need to be a genius to know Satoru had found you.

You both moved inside your apartment. Settling on the spacious couch you buried your face on Suguru’s lap as you cried. He stroked your now darker strands of h/c hair without a word exchanged. He knew you needed to let it all out. After what seemed an eternity you sat back up. Suguru gently dried your eyes.

“He was here last night…” you whispered in a raw and scratchy voice, result of your endless hours of distress before his arrival “he told me he loved me, that he left Sookie” scoff “and hear this… he left her because the baby wasn’t his!” Talk about karma at its best. Suguru already knew that but he was surprised to hear Satoru had come clean about it to you “He probably thought I would fall for that! But I didn’t” you added firmly.

Suguru was proud of you. He knew how hard it was for you to resist Satoru but you stood tall and proud when it mattered the most. “What do you want to do now?” Where you planning on moving again?

“I’m not leaving…” you said looking into Suguru’s liquid amber gaze. You couldn’t help but notice once again he had such pretty eyes, like a cat. You’ve always liked them, specially when they looked at you with such tenderness. You have missed him dearly during all this time.

“I can’t keep running away from him; I mean… it’s obvious he won’t stop and I… I am tired of molding my life to adapt to his whims. I’m staying here whatever happens. Sugu… I got the part for the Swan Lake!” You added remembering you haven’t talked to him during the last week and so he didn’t know about your latest accomplishment.

Geto’s eyes enlarged before a huge smile split his handsome face and his massive frame engulfed you in a tight hug. Of course he knew everything about ballet, he was your best friend after all. This was huge! Probably as big as making it in the ballet world meant “I’m so proud of you Kitten!” He said excitedly kissing your temple. Maybe not everything was as bad as he thought.

You were upset, it was true. But then again you were not prepared last night. Satoru had taken you by surprise. Now… you knew he was here and more or less knew what to expect from your soon to be ex-husband.

“Thank you Sugu…” you stopped and pulled back just slightly to look into his eyes from your height. He was a very tall man compared to you “I missed you” you said with a bright smile to which Geto replied with one of his own before pulling you in again for another hug “I missed you too Kitten” stroking your back softly Suguru decided he was happy to be here… with you.

https://youtu.be/3oSXqLgoSq4

youtube

|||

She's given up, been holding on for way too long

She's had enough

He's coming home again

But it's too late 'cause she won't stay with him

|||

The sunshine hitting his face was what woke him up. With a grunt Satoru rolled over on his side only to fall unceremoniously from the couch where he had passed out last night. The last thing he remembered was warping back to his hotel after you left him on the roof. The memory of you, turning your back on him and walking away squeezed his heart in a painful grasp.

Alcohol was never something he was attracted to, he liked to keep his brain constantly alert and stimulated. It served a purpose of course, it kept his infinity barrier on at all times, even when he was asleep. But last night he hit rock bottom. He didn’t care anymore…

As soon as he got back to the hotel, hopelessness made a home in his chest, sitting heavy on his heart. Walking to the fully stocked bar placed on the corner of his suite he opened a bottle of whiskey. He started slow since most everything was too bitter for his taste, so he went through the process of trying every single bottle until he found something to his liking.

Two hours and about fifteen different shots of everything he decided to settle for a bottle of Amaretto, some fancy Italian liquor made of apricot kernels. It was sweet.

Everything else after that was blur. Moving his sore body from the floor he forced himself to go to the bathroom. Maybe a hot shower would help ease his misery. Peeling off his clothes the smell of booze clinging on them made Gojo cringe. He decided to brush his teeth before showering. Looking in the mirror he couldn’t recognize the man starring back at him. He was a mess.

|||

Are we just ghosts out in the night?

Are we just waiting for a light that doesn't shine?

Are we just faking or is this real?

'Cause I don't know how to feel

Are we just ghosts now, you and I?

|||

Last night he had been so desperate, so hopeless and broken hearted. That’s when it hit him… his wife didn’t hurt him, she didn’t cheat on him (unlike himself), she didn’t do anything to him and yet he was feeling as if the world was collapsing around him. He lied, cheated and fucked up everything for them both.

Guilt…

Unadulterated, burning and suffocating guilt was consuming him. He felt bad before but it wasn’t until last night that he grasped the concept that Y/N didn’t owe him anything at all and that HE didn’t deserve it anyways.

The plan originally had been to get back in your good graces by doing penitence, submitting to your every whim and desire by becoming your devoted slave for as long as you would have it. He never even considered the possibility that his wife DID NOT WANT to forgive him in the first place.

He thought you left to give him a lesson, that you would eventually come back to him after he had a taste of what it was like to lose you.

But even after you both shared such a searing kiss, so passionate that every cell in his body was humming, aflame with desire you still managed to walk away from him as if it meant nothing to you.

What good did it do to him to be the strongest when he couldn’t even protect his wife… from himself.

After showering, changing clothes and ordering every sweet pastry and desert from the room service menu Gojo stopped to rethink his strategy.

What?…

Did you think he was going to stop there?

Absolutely no, love!

If anything, your rejection had only fueled his need to get you back.

“Time for plan B” sighing he pulled out his phone it rang a couple times before someone answered “good morning Mrs. Mazzo, this is Gojo Satoru. I’m going to need you to forward to me Miss Petrova’s rehearsal schedule…”

—

“This is really good!” You hummed happily after swallowing a bite of your steak. Suguru sat across from you at Keens Steakhouse, with a grin he watched as you indulged yourself in what you called your ‘cheat meal’ of the month. Being a professional ballerina was a tough and demanding commitment that controlled every aspect of your life, from how you train to what you eat. Despite it all, Geto knew you always found a happy balance that worked just fine for you.

Seeing your big smile made his heart jump in his chest, you were as beautiful and alluring as the day he met you. If only he had told you he liked you before Satoru did. This question kept him up at night, playing all sorts of scenarios in his mind. If he had taken the first step… would things have been different? Would you have ended up together? Married? Shaking his head he tried to focus on what you were actually saying. Deviating his thoughts to that kind of scenarios was dangerous. He also didn’t want to push it when he was perfectly aware you were still healing; he wasn’t a low life piece of shit to take advantage of your vulnerability.

But when you smiles at him as if he was the only thing in your world, when you held his hand across the table, playing with his finger, his throat felt dry and tight.

“What do you think Sugu?” Your curious and expecting eyes caught him like a deer in the headlights “I’m sorry Kitten, I was distracted. Could you repeat that please?” He asked with an affable smile.

You chuckled and stroke his hand softly “you look tired, did you sleep at all in the plane?” He shook his head “no, I didn’t. I never can, it’s uncomfortable” he hid on purpose the true reason why he hadn’t been able to sleep “come on Sugu! Let’s go back home! I bet you are tired” you said offering him a sweet smile.

After paying your bill you walked the few blocks back home. Suguru of course would be staying with you in the spare room of your penthouse. Holding hands while you talked to him about the activities the city had to offer, your schedule and how you intended to fit the time to do some tourism with him. “You don’t have to bother Kitten, I know you are busy enough with your job, I will be fine” he insisted.

You stopped on your tracks and stood in front of him, pouting, making him chuckle. You looked every bit the kitten he knew you to be, all bothered and moody “no! I want to spend time with you too you know! I haven’t seen you in so long! I’m not going to waste this chance!” You insisted to which Suguru threw his hands up in the air “I surrender Kitten! Do with me as you will” you giggled and then blushed. “Uh… eh… ok! I will!” He took your hand again and you both resumed your walk.

Satoru warped to the roof top of the building adjacent to yours, the lights were out in your apartment and he couldn’t sense your presence inside. You left? Where did you go?

Before a second though he warped inside your apartment but he saw all your stuff was still there, maybe you went out for groceries or something?

After a few minutes sitting on your couch he decided to wait for you on the street so he could see when you got home.

(Almost an hour later)

Oh… he wasn’t ready for what he saw.

“That mother fu….” Satoru grinds his teeth watching you walk down the street holding onto Suguru’s hand while talking distractedly. From his hiding spot in front of your building he closed his hands in a tight fist.

Well, this complicated things… a lot more.

————-> Chapter 10

———————————-

@sleepyamaya

@cloudsinthecosmos

@jxvajxy

@satoruhooraaa

@my-reality-is-in-my-head

@dok-ja

@jscarlet06

@fiona782

@thatsharklovingwoman

@heichoustheoryofcleanliness

@syynnaaah

@shaylove418

@coldvillainess

@vampgguk

@sukuna1stwife

#jjk #jjk Gojo #Gojo Satoru #gojo #Satoru #jujutsu geto #jujutsu gojo #geto x reader #gojo x reader #gojo angst #gojo x you #gojo saturo x reader #geto smut #geto x y/n #geto suguru #jjk suguru #getou suguru x y/n #Youtube

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animatedrapture · 3 years

Text

"𝖐𝖎𝖘𝖘 𝖒𝖊 𝖘𝖑𝖔𝖜𝖑𝖞" — suna rintarou ;

𝖘𝖚𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖞: suna rintarō is so much more than his bored eyes, the blunt between his lips, and his tendency to slack off—luckily, you're one of the very few people who know this; especially after he comes home to you sullen after finding out he didn't make it to the olympic players.

𝖙𝖆𝖌𝖘: female reader. fluff—established relationship. angst if you squint. comfort. mention of drug use. like, one swear word.

𝖜𝖔𝖗𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖙: 2k

𝖛𝖎𝖔𝖑𝖊𝖙'𝖘 𝖓𝖔𝖙𝖊: in lieu of the influx of toxic stoner!suna content, i offer you a piece of appreciation towards him and all that he is. i was meaning to post this in my new blog but i thought there's so much of you here who would appreciate and need this more. written on a whim at 1AM and didn't proofread so for any errors, gomen. repost because tumblr tagging hates me. cross posted on ao3 under the same username. original post here. this was written before we got information that he actually made it to the olympic team. furudate really told me to stfu, huh?

It's you who find out first that there is truly so much more to Suna Rintarō than his expressionless exterior, sleepy eyes, and bored gaze towards even the most ridiculous situations. It's when his self assured stance dwindled as he walked towards you once upon a time, introducing himself first before asking you for your number.

"My number?" You echoed his request, trying your best not to gawk at his attractive features and six foot two stature towering over you so easily; making you feel oh so small. (Which is funny, given that you were already standing straight on your heels.)

"If you don't mind, 's cool if you say no," he replies, tearing his gaze from you as if he was actually anxious you'd say no.

It's funny, really. It's not every day a famous pro-athlete known for both his good looks and skills walk up to you, asking for your number and actually considering you'd say no to him and his pretty features—in fact, nevermind that he was pretty, it was more the fact that he wasn't so full of himself to actually think you wouldn't say no.

That's what makes you nod your head; your heart already beating right out of your chest as he gives you a lazy grin and his phone to press your number in. When you're done, you hand it back to him and you mentally pat yourself at the back for not visibly trembling.

"Y/N?" He reads your name from the contact information, and good God, did your name sound so beautiful coming out of his mouth. He doesn't wait for your reply anymore, looking back at you from his phone, the lazy smile still across his lips as if he knew it was a heart killer.

"Thanks, I'll text you later," is the last thing he said before he walked away from you.

It didn't take long for you to fall in love with someone like Suna Rintarō—underneath his detached personality also lied someone who was truly passionate with the things he set his mind to, gave his time to. Like you or volleyball or the video game he's been waiting to release for a whole month—it only had to be something or someone who was special enough, then, he would give it his all.

The smoke that filled his lungs occasionally did nothing to lessen your own intoxication of Suna Rintarō and his passions—because every exhale, his dark green eyes would meet yours and oh so easily, he offers you that same lazy smile yet one that was dripping with affection.

"Should you even be smoking that, Rintarō?" You had questioned him before, about the second time you've seen him put the rolled blunt in between his soft lips, inhaling it.

"It's a once in a while kinda thing, you don't actually think I'd sacrifice my career for this don'tcha?" He grins at you, amusement flooding his usually bored eyes — now glazed over with the effects of the weed—from the way he gazes at you with an eyebrow raised.

It's when you realize that Suna Rintarō was independent and knew what he was doing—did what he did with full awareness, full control, full flexibility. It's as if who he was in court was who he was in person as well.

"You're really interesting, y'know that Rin?" You had mumbled against his chest once before, it was at the first few months of dating—he had one of his arms around you with you cuddled on his side, watching a movie from his couch.

"Yeah?"

"I mean—you've always been so good at what you do, huh? But you still work for it."

"What makes you say that?" You can feel him looking down on face against his chest.

"C'mon, don't be silly. You were scouted at middle school and you only got better as you grew up!" You say, finally moving your head to meet his gaze.

But all you get is a flick on your forehead and his low chuckle, "'s not that deep, y/n," he answers.

But you already knew better.

Suna isn't one for words, and no matter how much you insist that he was beyond the description of words, he only rolls his narrowed eyes at you. You find out Suna Rintarō, your boyfriend, was a huge inspiration during your sixth month together when you finally met his little sister.

It's hard to say it wasn't amusing how snarky she was, just as he was to his friends whom you've met a few times before—Atsumu and Osamu Miya, you remember. She's quick with her tongue, easily retorting back to her brother's comments.

"Are you sure you didn't just pay Y/N-san to be your girlfriend, nii-san?"

"Nah, you still jealous I came out prettier than you?" Suna bites back, a teasing grin plastered across his face. His sister only scoffs, looking back at you.

"You can tell me if he blackmailed you to come here!" She attempts to whisper. You're not sure whether you should be worried or continue to laugh, but you do neither as you choke on the drink you were sipping on right as she told you this.

"Shit, Y/N," Suna curses as you cough, your throat burning at the drink's intrusion, but Suna's quick to rub soothingly against your back as he offers you his water, his eyes glazed over in panic.

"You okay?" He asks when you stopped coughing, and you nod in response—throat remaining slightly sore. Suna lets out an aggravated groan, "Be careful next time," he manages to scold you, but oddly enough, his words remain saccharine.

There's something about the way that his little sister doesn't seem the least bit surprised with his reaction that somehow lets you know that perhaps, Suna Rintarō might just be quite the caring brother behind closed doors.

After that, it was when Suna excused himself to take a call from his manager, leaving you with his sister.

"Hey, nee-san, promise you'll take care of Rin-nii? You won't break his heart, will you?" His sister asks, eyes gleaming with something akin to hope, expectation, wonder. It easily takes you by surprise.

"Don't you worry, I'll promise I'll take care of him, promise I won't break his heart," your voice easily softens, nodding. His little sister's gaze remains on you, as if she's assessing you and as if she would easily tell whether or not you meant the words that came out of your mouth.

It makes you hold a breath until she nods slowly, smiling at you lightly just as Suna comes walking back, eyebrows raised, knowing he must've missed something.

"Whatcha girls talkin' bout?" He asked as he slipped back on his seat beside you.

"None of your business, obviously," his sister quickly answers.

They're truly quite similar, it's enough to make you smile and get through meeting his little sister until both of you dropped her off back to the train station.

"What'd she tell you?" Suna nudged you after seeing her train leave.

"Nothing, Rin," you answered with a wide smile, leaning up to place a chaste kiss against his lips—yet just as you pull away, one of his hands has found its way behind your neck, pulling you back to him.

You never thought a kiss could feel so loving before—but it really seemed as if Suna Rintarō had a knack for proving you wrong, over and over again.

It was the day that the Olympic team was announced when you see so much more of Suna Rintarō. Quick like the blink of an eye, or lightning that leaves the thunder chasing it; Suna felt the exhaustion, the pressure, the burnt-out feeling that's been repressed in the back of his head. It comes to him, crashing down like boulders not just on his shoulders but weighing down every part of his body.

Did he lack somewhere? He wonders. Where did that lacking end and start? What could have he done? Was it training, where he spent most of his time now? Suna had end up seeing you less and less since the drafting of olympic players started and you've been nothing but patient.

What was he supposed to tell you? After all the time it has stolen away from you—that he didn't make it?

When he opened the door to your shared apartment, he doesn't look up at you with a relieved sigh as he usually would—he avoids you gaze entirely, he avoids your observing eyes from the couch you sat on, watching him slowly shrug his shoes off.

"I'm just gonn—" he started, about to make an excuse to avoid looking at you.

"Prepared your bath, Rin. C'mon," Suna hears you say but it doesn't sink in his head, watching you take his hand, leading him to the bathroom.

Suna remains silent as he looks down on the bath you prepared for him, warm and inviting.

"Meet me in the kitchen when you're done, okay?" He hears you say, followed by the echo of your footsteps walking away.

You easily understand that Suna Rintarō was more than his talents, his efforts, and every little thing about him when you feel his large arms wrapped around you, his broad chest pressed against your back and his face buried on the crook of your neck. His fresh scent right out of the shower engulfing you and invading your senses, flooding you with him.

"'m sorry, bunny," he mumbles.

"You have nothing to be sorry about, Ri—"

"It's odd, thought I'd pull it off, thought it'd be nothin' if I didn't make it. Don't know why I'm so upset right now," he continues, cutting you off, "Been so patient for me too, bunny. Thought I'd be nice to make you proud, ya know?"

Your sigh comes out sharp from the heavy feeling from your chest, not knowing what to do to make him feel better—like he did with you, always knowing his way around your low moments.

You wriggle out of his arms, making him grumble until you fully face him. He looks back at you with a small frown, eyebrows furrowed, watching your expression.

"I'm always proud of you, Rin. Olympic player or not, you make me so proud," you speak softly, your hands cupping each side of his face.

"Don't even get why it matters to me this much, it's just—" it was your turn to cut him off, tipping your toes to press a lingering kiss against his lips. Suna smiles against your lips, carrying you to sit on the kitchen counter like he always did—knowing you always would have to tip on your toes to reach him.

Soon, the lingering kiss turns slow and passionate—lips softly grazing the other, and it feels more like pouring the heavy weight of love out of your chest and into the other. A kiss so loving, so reassuring, so passionate—the kind that easily takes your breath away and makes your mind go blank. When Suna pulls away, he rests his forehead against yours, breathing heavily. You smile at him because it's all you can do when your heart feels like it's going to leap out of your throat just to offer itself to him entirely—and Suna smiles back at you, pecking your lips before wrapping his arms around you again, resting his chin on your shoulder.

You run your fingers through his hair, hoping it would help soothe him, and then you say, "I promise that you'll make it next year, Rin. I'll be with you now, and I'll still be with you then."

It only makes him hold you tighter, closer to him, "I love you, Y/N."

"I love you, Rintarō. You deserve the world and all the stars in the galaxy."

"'s too bad there's nothin' more I need than you, then."

That's what Suna tells you—Suna, who was smoke in his lungs, dumb videos of the twins to blackmail them with, little mistakes, bored eyes, and lazy attitude. The same Suna who was slow kisses, passion, and genuine smiles reserved for you—the same Suna who gave his passions his all, the same Suna who held you securely in his arms every night, the same Suna his little sister admired. Most of all, the same Suna Rintarō you loved with every beat of your heart, every fibre of your being.

#suna x reader #suna rintarou #haikyuu x reader #suna #haikyuu #suna rintaro x reader #haikyuu imagines #rintarou suna #suna fluff #haikyuu fluff #suna Rintarō #;cloud #IM SO PRESSED!!!#so anNOYED!!#GODDAMN HAD TO REPOST

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soleilsuhh · 3 years

Text

— soon the cold night falls.

plot. when you went to doyoung’s place to study, you didn’t expect to end up staying the night and sleeping on the same bed.

pairing. doyoung x gender neutral! reader.

genre. college!au. fluff. suggestive. pining. good ol’ sharing-a-bed trope.

word count. 1.8k words.

you had been falling behind in maths, which was why you asked doyoung to help you study. although you didn’t have the same major, you knew he was more than proficient in the subject. he had eventually agreed to help but not without calling you an idiot first. this was how you found yourself in his rented studio apartment where he lived off-campus, about fifteen minutes from the university.

suddenly, you felt a hard but painless tap on your hand.

"are you listening?" he demanded, the look on his face is evident that he already knew the answer. he sighed, "pay attention, y/n, this topic is important."

"it seems like even you can't make maths interesting,"

he shot you a look at which you responded immediately by raising your palms up slightly in surrender, topped by a cheeky grin. you tried your best to focus as he continued with the explanation but by the time he reached to the next page, your thoughts began to drift away from the formulas and to the fact that the two of you were alone.

it wasn't as if this was the first time you had been alone with him in a room; you weren't sure why you were feeling jittery and why your foot was bouncing of its own accord under the table.

"—will you stop zoning out!"

his raised voice and the sound of frustrated slam of pen on the table startled you, effectively pulling you away from your thoughts.

surprisingly, the rest of the tutoring session went by smoothly. but it seemed like at some point while studying for what felt like forever, you fell asleep. when you woke up, you were pleasantly surprised to feel a jacket wrapped securely around you, and that its owner was also asleep in front of you, using his own arm as a pillow. his face was serene, the soft breathing making the world outside seem to stand still.

you grabbed your phone, trying to ignore the odd feeling in your heart. looking at the screen, you jumped, nearly causing the jacket to fall off your shoulders. it was already midnight, and you were still at his apartment. you reached over to shake doyoung awake, and as he rubbed his eyes, you showed him the lit-up screen.

he momentarily froze in his movements. "huh." he looked at you, "sorry, i didn't mean to fall asleep; i was planning to wake you up before your dorm curfew," he paused and after a moment, he said: “do you want to stay here tonight?”

your heart involuntarily beat faster at that and you brushed it off. it was probably a good idea; you were already an hour past the curfew. you said ‘okay,’ before calling your roommate to inform them. they sounded sleepy but nonetheless, relieved to hear from you. as you talked on the phone, doyoung walked over to his dresser and your gaze lingered after him.

“catch,” he said, throwing a simple tee and sweatpants at your direction just as you hung up.

you caught them clumsily.

“thought they might be more comfortable than your jeans, but you don’t have to change if you don’t want to,”

you smiled at him, “thank you,” you brought the clothes closer to get the whiff of fresh scent, “they smell really nice,”

he scoffed but not unkindly.

as you shuffled towards the bathroom to change, he began to put away the books on the table. when you came out, the table was cleared, everything neatly stacked and an extra bedding was spread out on the floor along with a pillow.

"you take the bed," he said, gesturing towards it.

you blinked at him for a moment then delcared, "hell no, this is your place anyway; i can sleep on the floor,"

"exactly, this is my place, so i make the rules," he said, "take the bed,"

you refused to move, not giving in but also uncertain about what to say. this was such a conflicting situation you were in; why did you care that much if he slept on the floor? why were your eyes so fixated on the fact that there was no extra blanket for him? what was this clenching feeling in your stomach?

"the bed is big enough for two people..." you awkwardly suggested. "i mean it's not like we've never shared a bed before,"

it's true; you had taken so many naps together - that was back in primary and middle school, yes, and things might not be the same anymore.

you could have sworn that you saw doyoung's movements stop after hearing your suggestion but he continued whatever he was doing on his phone. his lack of response was a clear enough answer for you.

"um, fine then," you said with a hint of despondency.

"i guess we can keep a pillow between us," his voice came. "i don't have an extra blanket too, anyway and it gets cold at night," he paused a brief second and lifted his head to look at you, "are you sure you're okay with sharing a bed?"

you nodded, a little too eagerly, a little too fast, "yeah, i'm okay with it! sounds good!"

the two of you remained motionless on the bed. it was awkward. you couldn't tell if he felt the same or if he was already asleep. he was lying still on his back, eyes closed and face relaxed.

you tried not to move too much, but you couldn't help yourself from restlessly tossing and turning, pulling the cover that you were sharing slightly closer to your body. he was right; the night was really cold.

suddenly, you felt a hand on yours, not grabbing it, just resting there and applying enough pressure to get your attention. you noticed how warm his hand was and you cherished it.

"y/n," his voice was soothing in the quietness of the night, "stop moving so much,"

you stopped and his touch, warm and gentle, lingered before he completely retreated his hand.

after a moment, you lifted your head slightly, "doyoung?"

"hmm?"

"i'm cold,"

he eventually opened his eyes and got out of bed with a sigh; he headed towards his dresser, the path dimly lit by the moon and then he came back with a hoodie which he tossed at you. "here,"

you mumbled a 'thank-you' as you put it on, feeling both thankful yet also...disappointed. you weren't sure why though. what exactly were you expecting anyway?

once again, both of you lied down on your backs, neither moving; his eyes closed, and yours wide open. minutes passed before you began to feel restless again. somehow, your mind wouldn't stop thinking about how warm his hand was and how yours was itching to be held again.

you turned your body to completely face him as you edged closer to the pillow barrier between you two. "doyoung?" you tried.

you waited a few seconds.

"what?"

"i'm still cold,"

you waited a few seconds. a few more. and a few more.

you were certain you wouldn’t get a response anymore. he was probably tired and dying to get some sleep. and he already gave you a hoodie; what more could he do for you?

sleepless, you found yourself distracted by how pretty he looked in the pale moonlight that came through the window. you noticed an eyelash on his cheek and tentatively, you reached over to gently brush it away. you were tempted to wake him so that he can make a wish but that probably wasn't a good idea. despite how warm his hand was, his face was cool under your touch, his skin so soft that you found yourself lightly trailing a finger along his features; first his cheekbone, then his nose, and when your finger reached his lip, his breath deepened and his eyelids moved albeit still closed. you stopped dead.

you weren't sure whether knowing that he was awake made you feel more nervous or more delighted. perhaps both.

your fingertips lingered on his skin, waiting for him to stop you but he didn't. you felt compelled to continue and that’s what you did; your fingers began moving again, trailing over the shape of his lips. with each passing second, your movements gained more sense of ease and certainty as your feathery touch brushed along his jawline, creeping down his neck, and then his collarbone.

you watched, marvelled as his breath hitched softly.

your fingers edged up his neck again.

and his hand grabbed your wrist. there it was. that warm touch of his.

he opened his eyes and your gazes locked.

the look on his face was unreadable and it made you all the more nervous and excited. the eye-contact broke only when you gulped, trying to shove the nerves down, and his eyes followed the movement on your neck.

“you said you’re cold?”

you nodded.

letting go of your wrist, his eyes met yours again. “turn around.”

you looked at him uncertainly, suddenly feeling a tingling sensation in your fingertips and toes. “why?”

he gave you a small, reassuring smile, and his hand reached out to trace along your jaw and down your neck, the maneuver emulating yours earlier.

“you’ll see,”

you shifted your position and turned until you were facing the other way. behind you, you felt the pillow between you two being lifted and placed on the other side of the bed. soon after, doyoung wrapped his arms around yours, pulling the covers over your bodies and holding you close. back pressed against his chest, you entwined your arm with his and laced your fingers together.

the two of you stayed like that for a while, still and quiet.

it was him who broke the silence, “how about now?” he said, “are you still cold?”

you smiled, “no, this is really nice,”

“good.”

it was a little awkward and stiff at first. but after a while, it became peaceful as you both slowly relaxed and allowed yourselves to melt into the warm embrace. your breathing slowed down and your heart stopped racing. the steady rise and fall of his chest was so comforting and you found yourself snuggling closer against his chest and into his arms.

“honestly,” you began, voice quiet but light-hearted, “i was kind of thinking about something else when you told me to turn around,”

he hummed amusedly and let out a chuckle. then he leaned forward to hover his lips over your ear, “i know what you were thinking,” his voice was barely above a whisper and held a tone of refrained laughter.

you shivered but eventually bursted out laughing, and he promptly joined, unable to contain it in him any longer. the laughter in the stillness of the night was heavenly. doyoung muffled himself by burying his face in your neck to stop himself from laughing too loud for the sake of the neighbors, but that only caused you to laugh louder and harder because of the tickling sensation. in spite of himself, he managed to whisper soft ‘shh’s and gently covered your mouth with his hand from behind.

even as you both tried to calm yourselves down, you broke into fits of soft giggles every now and then. doyoung tried to sound annoyed as he told you to go to sleep but he couldn’t stop smiling.

you sighed, happy and content but also sad because you knew this moment would eventually pass, “i don’t want this to end,”

“don’t be silly,”

silence filled the room for a while.

“you can come sleep over whenever you want,” he said, hugging you closer, his voice soft and unwavering.

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skania · 3 years

Text

The Final Stroke: Thoughts on Haru's conflict (+Rin)

Okay so reading all the summaries of The Final Stroke Part 1 has left me with A LOT of thoughts. About Haru, about Rin, about Rin & Haru and how all the different character conflicts will be tied together in Part 2.

BUT since I have been waiting YEARS for Free! to feed me some juicy Haru conflict, of course I'm sinking my teeth into that first because peeling off Haru's layers has always been my favorite Free! sport.

It's been a long while since I've tried to get into Haru's head AND I haven't even watched the movie yet so I'm probably wrong, but here goes nothing. As per usual, it will be long and image-heavy because I can't keep things short and sweet to save my life.

Also, it's heavy on spoilers about The Final Stroke so please do not read without reading Fencer's summary first!

AND since it's basically impossible to discuss Haru without discussing Rin and vice-versa, please do also expect a healthy dose of RinHaru.

Utsumi: Indeed; it’s a path Haruka never would have chosen himself. But despite claims that he doesn’t care about winning or losing or scoring certain times, he’s always been attentive to Rin’s presence. [x]

Please assume there's a huge "IMO" attached to this whole post.

In Season 1, we saw Haru struggle to understand that the reason for his emotional turmoil was quite simply that he wanted to swim with Rin again.

In Season 2, we saw Haru struggle because he wanted to follow Rin into the Pro world, but he felt like he didn't deserve to do so because he didn't have a dream and thus, no strong feelings about competitive swimming itself.

Needless to say, there's a pattern.

In Season 3, the series kind of took a detour. Still, it did plant some seeds, the most important IMO being the following:

"After I hit 20, I will be..."

"If you ask me what lies ahead of me, I..."

"You can't survive without throwing something away. I didn't want to throw anything away. But I lost."

"Maybe I don't deserve to compete at the global level."

Road to the World adds some extra layers to all that by showing us just what else is connected to that fear of Haru's.

Because, what do we see after Rin tells Haru that no matter what wall [Rin] faces, the one thing that doesn't change is his desire to keep swimming with [Haru]?

We see the moment Rin tells Haru "aim for the world with me, Haru!". Then, the moment Rin asks Haru what his dream is—right when Haru finally felt free after achieving the dream he had that season, that of swimming with Rin again. Lastly, we see the moment Rin asks Haru "what will you do?" when it comes to choosing between swimming in a recreational pool, or the one used by the National Team.

Every single one of these moments brought Haru closer to his dream—and Rin is the common factor in them all. So when Rin tells Haru,

It's obvious by those flashbacks alone what Haru's answer is. He, too, wants to keep swimming with Rin in that world.

But before the thought can fully form in Haru's mind, Albert flashes through it. We immediately see Haru's disposition change, and the result is the most telling of all.

Just like always, the imagery is on point. Rin and his desire to swim with him give Haru strength and purpose and Haru clenches his fist—but this time, Albert seeps that strength from him until his fist goes limp. And suddenly, Haru doesn't know what to say to Rin anymore.

Because, what Albert makes Haru wonder, is this:

From my limited perspective (like I said before, I haven't watched TFS yet), I think that might just be where the heart of Haru's issue in The Final Stroke lies.

I think a big part of why Haru wants to win against Albert so badly is probably because he wants to prove to himself that he does deserve to be in that world—like Rin. That all his friends are right to believe in him.

And he feels even more pressured because he thinks he's running out of time.

All this pressure to win—not to feel the water better or to be the best in the water he loves so much, but simply to win before he's "ordinary"—does not let Haru swim freely. He doesn’t swim like himself.

He is probably terrified of his own limits and of how close he might be to hitting them, and this fear and pressure are binding him.

Moreover, while Haru decided that he wanted to swim in that world, the truth is that he doesn’t know what the future holds for him.

He has no long-term, tangible plans. Unlike Rin, who wants to win a gold medal, Haru just wants to swim "in the whole world". This, added to the fact that he thinks he’ll be ordinary by 20 and that he has not managed to beat Albert, makes it so Haru is basically blinded to what the future can bring for him. He can’t see that sight.

Part of the reason for this, I feel, is that the series has never addressed the big elephant in the room.

What exactly does Haru get out of competitive swimming, besides swimming with Rin? Because "swimming in that world" is nice and sweet and idealistic, but it doesn't cover the fact of racing itself.

I used to talk a lot about why Haru needed to find a reason to enjoy competing even when it isn't against Rin. That he needed to find a reason to want that for himself. I even thought S3 may finally go for it, but it ended without Haru finding meaning in that "world of wins and losses", as he used to call it.

Usually, he’d look at Rin to point the way forward. And it is knowing that Rin (and to a lesser extent, Ikuya) is there fighting with him and aiming for the world as well that gives Haru some reassurance.

However, from what we know from the summaries, Haru isn’t thinking of them when he swims. He is entirely caught up on needing to beat Albert because of what it has come to represent to him.

There’s also the issue of Haru’s competitiveness. Haru spent a long time suppressing it and only indulging in it with Rin. But he has always wanted to be the best in the water—the one who "feels" it best.

It wasn’t that he wanted to win, or that he hated losing; it was just that he couldn’t simply accept that there was someone who could feel the water more than he could. (x)

So when you combine all of this, I feel like Haru has lost sight of the most important thing—that instead of swimming just to win, like it’s a job, he should swim to feel the water he loves so much and, most importantly, for the team (with his friend’s feelings in his heart).

That way, he could swim like himself and the water won’t be sad nor lonely.

This all sounds like a lot and it is. Haru is all but suffocating under this weight.

So, when Rin comes and tells him that [Haru] will be facing Albert alone—that they aren’t fighting him together, like Haru hoped for—Haru snaps.

It’s not only that what Haru perceives as the biggest obstacle to his dream (Albert) is standing before Haru (alone) and Rin won’t be there to share his struggles, but also that Rin is the reason he’s there in the first place because Rin is the one that made Haru stop wanting to be ordinary.

He’s the reason why he’s gotten to this point and the reason he came into the global stage and ran into Albert. He’s also the biggest thing Haru will lose if he can’t win against Albert—because if Haru’s dream ends, he won’t get to swim with Rin in that world anymore.

And now Rin’s walking away from swimming free and leaving him alone with this beast of a swimming machine and with [Haru’s] own limitations. And Haru feels trapped. He feels bitter. He feels betrayed. Terrified.

And, of course, lost. Because just like Rin once said, "Without you, I have nothing to aim for, you know?"

So, he snaps.

And by burning bridges with Rin, the very embodiment of "For the Team", the one person that he has always wanted to swim with most of all, the one whose feelings he was still connected to above all—by virtue of swimming together in that world, by sharing a dream—Haru now feels like he's truly alone in the water.

Haru is essentially turning his back on the very reason he swims for—in more ways than one. So, he’s becoming a second Albert. Only there to win, not to have fun.

Because that’s the thing. Haru says he’s doing it for his dream, but since he can’t see that dream clearly, he lacks direction. All he can see is the immediate future and all that stares back at him are his own limitations—embodied by Albert himself.

Albert represents, then, the road Haru must not take. Haru can’t be all about becoming stronger simply for the sake of winning—and he must definitely not do so alone. Like Ikuya said in S3, if Haru isn't gaining that strength for someone else (the team), there's no point.

So, since this is Free!, Haru needs to go back to his roots and truly swim for the team once again. But I feel like he also needs to re-contextualize his dream and truly define what it entails, for once and for all. Which, if we go by everything we've seen so far—should involve swimming with Rin.

Only then will he be able to swim freely again.

There's A LOT of foreshadowing and things from S3 that will most likely play a role in that and I haven't even touched Rin's choice to not swim free anymore, but this has gotten really long and I've run out of image slots lmao so I'll just have to ramble about those some other time 🙇‍♀️

#rinharu #harurin #nanase haruka #sharkbait #me: swimming idiots #the final stroke spoilers #skip this if you don't want any spoilers!#I am so sorry for this huge wall of ramblings but Haru is back to being fascinating and I'm loving every second of it #this post has a huge brain storming feel to it because it's basically while I wrote while trying to make sense of my thoughts on haru's #I may be 100% off though since visual cues are essential in getting haru and I haven't watched the movie #but making a fool of myself is part of the fun so speculating here I come lmao

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madmilkboi · 3 years

Text

ᨳ running in circles

➜ 𝘀𝐮𝗺𝗺𝐚𝗿𝘆: you and suna would never let each other go even if it was suffocating and toxic.

➜ 𝗴𝐞𝗻𝗿𝐞: angst

➜ 𝘄𝐚𝗿𝗻𝐢𝗻𝗴/𝘀: toxic relationship, cheating, mentions of alcohol, cursing i think that's all lmao

➜ 𝗽𝐚𝐢𝗿𝐢𝗻𝗴: suna rintaro x gn!reader

a/n: here's an angsty suna fic that i wrote at 2 am also pls listen to circles by post malone while reading this to feel smth lmao n e ways i don't condone this type of behavior if ever ur s/o is acting like sht leave em babes u deserver better mwa xoxo

You woke up to the sound of the car being parked in the garage, you looked at the clock and saw that it was 3 am, a dreadful hour really. You stood up from the bed and walked downstairs carrying your phone.

You were welcomed with a sober Suna, red and purple hickes trailed all over his neck and collarbone while the corners of his lips were stained with a faint red lipstick. He looked at you, his sharp gaze acted like a dagger, impaling your already battered heart.

His once loving eyes were cold, empty—a void even. Suna's love for you was long gone, not even a bit was left but he can't seem to let go of you. He doesn't want to be alone so he kept you and so did you. You both know that the love is getting hostile but stayed for the sake of company.

"Have you ate dinner yet?" You asked, worried if he even had a nice meal, well he sure did in an intimate way. "Not hungry" he answered, he took off his shoes and walked upstairs not even sparing you a single glance. A lump formed on your throat hearing his heavy steps.

You let out a heavy breath and silently followed him, he sat on the bed looking at the dreadful grey walls. You walked to the other side of the bed and layed down, facing the opposite side.

As he felt the weight of the mattress shift. He can't help but look at you, his eyes lingering at your back. He was reminiscing the times when both you and him would fall asleep hugging each other. He missed the warmth, the pointless yet fun conversations and the intimacy you both shared but now even if you and him were in the same room, it felt like you were so far away from him. So distant and out of reach.

As he was looking at you, he felt a tear leave his eye. Though he thinks that there was no more love left for you, there still was and it hurted him so much, the fact that everytime he shows you genuine affection you doubt and think that it was to cover up something that he did.

But it was his fault after all, he was the reason why you developed trust issues and he hated himself because of that. He would always regret the morning after he's slept with another person while you waited for him the whole night.

He sighed, and took off his shirt feeling the coldness of the room. As he was about to close his eyes, he heard a sniffle from your direction.

—

You cursed at yourself for letting out a loud sound. You were currently sobbing, well what's new? You do that every night to relieve yourself from the growing pain your heart was feeling.

You covered your mouth while your tears dripped from your face. You couldn't take it, every night he sleeps with another person and sometimes would even bring them home and that hurted so much. And the fact that he was in the same room broke you even more.

You couldn't take it anymore, You stood up and grabbed your phone and wallet, texting a friend at the process. Suna only looked at you for a few minutes until he realized what you were about to do.

You walked down the stairs taking each step carefully since you can't see well because of your blurry vision. He hurriedly stood up and chased after you downstairs. He grabbed your arm and looked at you with soft glistening eyes.

"Please don't leave" he pleaded, he doesn't want to be alone.

"Rin, let's end this..." you muttered through sobs. "Please?" You looked at him with puffy eyes.

He shooked his head, his lips forming a thin line. "We can fix this" he says as he rubs your cheeks with his thumbs.

Stop lying, please.

"We can't" you mumbled, eyes downcast. "It's hopeless. We're hopeless" you let out a sad chuckle. He shooked his head once again and pointed at himself.

"I'll change my ways" he told you.

Lies. He thought to himself, no matter how much he has said that to you he never really changed and he was fully aware of that. His lifestyle was goodly intoxicating—like a drug he'd say.

You looked at him, you really wanted to let go of him, of this toxic relationship but something was stopping you and it was the fact that you'd have no more Rin to wake up to, take care of and of course to love.

"I love you" the three words that were music to your ears. The only lie that you love hearing.

He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you close to him. "I love you so fucking much" you gave up, surrendering on his arms, melting by the warmth of his skin. "So please, don't leave" you nodded your head and rubbed his back. "I won't" you whispered placing a kiss on his forehead.

"Let's go back to bed" he held your hand and lead you upstairs to your shared bedroom. The both of you layed down and embraced each other.

Like the seasons here on Earth everything changes just like your love shifting from hot to cold, it was like a merry go round going in circles, a constant loop of breaking up and getting back together. No matter how you and him run away from each other you still both end up cradled in each others arm, longing for the spark that once fueled your love.

🏷: @crescenttooru @leronddesorciere @fleurdedyo @owlnymph @kawaiiisis (shoot an ask or dm if u wanna be added on my taglist! ^v^)

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17caratssi · 3 years

Text

Wonwoo! Will you stay

Jeon Wonwoo! A short series pt one | two | three | four Being rejected for the first time doesn't put you off. In fact, your interest in him grows bigger.

You don't remember what happens after you blurt that offering out to Wonwoo. But for sure, Wonwoo rejects you on the spot.

"If you think I was joking, nope. I was serious and it's probably the most serious question I've ever asked in my life,"

"Yeah, sure. The answer is still no. Let me tell you something,"

Your eyes sparkle with hope. Is he going to say that he's not ready yet, and if I work harder, maybe he'll reconsider?

Wonwoo thought he would never have to tell anyone this, but this may be the best.

"I give no shit about anything and being here in this school just makes me sick. I want to quickly graduate so that I can die in peace,"

"And also, I have no plan to be nice to girls who approach me." he finishes what he wanted to say. It sounds cruel, and even some of it isn't what he intended to say, but he just wants to put an end to her.

If she's smart, she would be clear of it.

But you don't care the things Wonwoo spouts. You like him, and your eyes are on him.

"Okay then! I'll try my hardest to charm you," you squeeze your hand in determination. You don't waver from his intense stare and add, "You know, this is my first time confessing to a guy and this is also my first time getting rejected but I'm pretty sure I can make you my boyfriend. I can wait, yes. Even it takes me 10 years, as long as I like you, I will pursue!"

Wonwoo shrugs and turns away. He's not certain of you, and your word kind of stir him a little. In 18 years of life, you are the first person to talk to him in this way and disregard whatever he said.

Since young, Wonwoo limits himself to talking. He pays a lot of attention to his words to avoid unnecessary emotions. However, today, he finally meets his contender.

"My warning remains valid,"

"Alright!"

After school, Wonwoo packs his bag and leaves the class immediately.

Wonwoo has to do part-time for his family. Initially, he wanted to turn down the scholarship, but his mother secretly accepted the offer. All she wants for Wonwoo to continue school and not bury his youth with responsibilities.

With the other five siblings, he couldn't possibly let his old mother do all the work. Therefore, he applies for the empty cashier position nearby his rented house just three kilometres from the school. His part-time job requires him to arrive fast, and since he hasn't gotten his bicycle, Wonwoo has to run to the convenience store.

You followed him from behind, but he is sure fast! You panted all the way to the elevator as you watch him uses the stairs and speeds away.

"Y/N!" Yuran, your childhood best friend, calls your name.

Yuran is the one that introduces you to this school when she was informed that you will return to Korea. She is a year older, and she treats you like a sister since you are the only child. You always love to be around here, and now that you two are in the same school, you will have a friend to rely on.

You wave at her as she jogs toward you.

"How's the first day?"

You contemplate. You are not familiar with Korea, and it seems the people here are so different to Americans. You scratch your head.

"So far, good." You opt for a lie and only remember about Wonwoo. "Oh! My seatmate is handsome," you brag.

"That's all you can think of?" She nudges your arm lightly.

Frankly, 80% of the time, you just admire him.

You realize that his side profile is wonderfully sculpted; the sharp jawline and the distance between his forehead and eyebrows are just right.

You are going to appreciate this beautiful human being while you are alive.

"Yuran-eonnie, come to my house this Saturday," you link your arm around Yuran's, and in an excited voice, you add, "My family is hosting a house-warming party. It's not grand so we invite only close friends. Therefore, you must come!"

Yuran giggles and pat your arm.

"Of course I would come! I miss your mom a lot. Will she cook?"

"HAHA! My dad won't let her cook anymore so we might as well order for the food,"

"Ugh, your dad is still so overprotective. Their love never dies, huh?"

You sigh at the thought of your parents' affection. It's admirable but tiring for me. It's like they feed me dog food every day!"

The two of you burst out laughing. The chat goes on until you come to the gate. Yuran left first, and you wait for your dad to pick you up.

"How's school?"

You beam at your dad and answer truthfully. "Great! I might get a boyfriend soon, though- Why are you laughing?" you whine.

"Nothing, I just hope to meet my son-in-law. I can't wait to lecture him,"

"Dad!!?"

"What? I must tell him that my daughter is the most precious human being and he is obligated to love you for the rest of his life if he wants to marry you!"

"Like how you love mom?"

"Yeah, of course. He better be overflowing with love for you or else,"

You smile. Your dad is always overreacting when it comes to this topic. He has very high expectations of the boys you mention to him, and it scares you since Wonwoo doesn't reciprocate your feeling just yet.

As the car passes the buildings, you recognize Wonwoo, who's running to his destination. You grin and pull your dad's hand.

"Dad, please stop the car!"

The tires screech to halt, and in a blink, you already come out of the car and reach Wonwoo. He pants and is in confusion as to how you manage to chase him. Then, he realizes.

"What do you want?"

You scan him and wipe the beads of perspiration on his face. You flash a happy smile before saying.

"Where's your driver?"

Wonwoo, for a second, almost couldn't identify the person. He is baffled. "W-what?"

"Oh! Jump in, I'll send you home,"

Wonwoo is taken aback. What do you mean by 'Where's your car?' but before he gets to ask you, he's being pulled by force. Plunge into the backseat, Wonwoo's awareness heightens in the presence of someone in the driver seat.

"Where are you going? My dad can drive you there,"

In fact, you're the only person in the car that's jubilant. Your dad is sceptical to Wonwoo, and the same goes for the latter.

"I can walk,"

You quickly stop him from opening the door. "Dad, we can send him to his place, right?"

Your dad looks at the rear-view mirror and hesitates. He eventually gives in and replies.

"Yes, dear," his sight swifts to Wonwoo. "Boy, tell me where you're going?"

Wonwoo grunts lowly and tells the two the direction. Since he isn't going back home and doesn't want anyone to know he's working part-time, he lies.

You keep talking to Wonwoo despite getting no answer. He closes his eyes and clears his mind.

Once arrive, you follow him out.

"I'll excuse you this time because your father is watching. I won't tolerate your behaviour next time!"

The atmosphere at that moment is calm and clear. Though cars are passing by, they make no sound. Hence, you can definitely understand what he meant.

"Don't go running about in the noon, you'll get sick! See you tomorrow at school!"

As a girl, you totally get the meaning of Wonwoo's words. He cuts through your heart with his harsh warning, and you endure it.

Maybe this is my karma since I always leave the people around me. These few foul words from the person I like aren't that bad. I'm willing to be on the receiving end.

You enter the car with your lips stretch to your ears. To avoid getting questioned by your father of Wonwoo's identity, you avert the attention.

"Dad, thank you for taking me in,"

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

I've created a schedule for this series- every Wednesday and Saturday, but it also depends on the chapter availability. Since I'm on my semester break, I have more time to write it unless I have writer's block. I accept requests for drabbles, one shot and anything you want me to write ;)

If you like this story, you might as well check out the others here !

#wonwoo #seventeen #jeon wonwoo #wonwoo imagine #wonwoo one shot #wonwoo fluff #wonwoo angst #wonwoo au #seventeen au #kpop au #kpop imagine #kpop #wnwoo_will you stay #wonwoo_WYS2

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