#but the second one thing goes wrong he completely fucking loses it
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"Ganondorf is the avatar of power, he would never show any weakness, he is incapable of any sort of genuine kindness, he should be written as someone who is always in a position of dominion and invulnerability because someone like Ganondorf could never be any other way-"
Honestly, skill issue.
#being vulnerable isn't just about being a crybaby that wears their heart on their sleeve#I would in fact argue that Ganondorf is very vulnerable#his emotions are erratic and change at the drop of a hat#you can easily rattle him if you know what sets him off#he has a plan and is confident in his plans#but the second one thing goes wrong he completely fucking loses it#compare that to Link who will be faced with the worst circumstances and adapt without breaking a sweat#ganonthots
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Part two of the Catboy in the Village AU
-
Cellbit wakes up handcuffed, which really doesn't bode well.
He's... moving. He's sitting up with his head pillowed on something soft, yet firm, and he's moving.
Ah. So he has been kidnapped, then. Great.
Groaning, Cellbit hides his face in his pillow's shoulder, confident that he isn't sticking his face anywhere it shouldn't be. He knows this shoulder, it's one of his favorites.
"Buenos días, gatinho," Roier warmly says. A kiss lands itself in Cellbit's hair right between his ears.
Cellbit fights the urge to purr (not now!), and he murmurs, "Am I going to be angry when I open my eyes?"
"Mmm, probably."
Cellbit sighs. So it's like that, then.
Eyes still closed, he pricks his ears up and tries to take in his environment. Horses, someone guiding them. Wheels noisily turning. Roier breathing, Cellbit himself breathing, someone else breathing. Three people total in the carriage- because they have to be in one, Cellbit doubts a supposed "prince" would be left to travel in a simple wagon.
Absolutely no signs of Richarlyson and Pepito. No arguing, no crying, no complaining. Nothing.
Slowly, Cellbit lets out a breath. He's calm.
"Roier," he asks, "where are our children?"
Roier stiffens minutely beneath him. "Um."
"Your children are fine," someone else says, and, ah, it would be her, wouldn't it?
Cellbit swallows his anger. He's calm.
He sits up, scooting closer to Roier so their arms are brushing because he is not about to be away from him right now. He opens his eyes, and he stares at the woman who has to be the newly-crowned Queen of the Gato Kingdom, and he hates.
"Your highness," he coolly says. "Where the fuck are my children?"
The queen's eyebrow twitches. "Don't call me that."
"Your highness. My children?"
"Not... with us at the moment, but I have my finest knights searching for them as we speak. Once we find them-"
She screeches as Cellbit lunges at her with his fangs bared. He can't use his hands, but that's fine, he was in prison once, he knows how to tear a throat out without using his claws.
He "oof"s as he's swiftly kicked in the chest by a heeled shoe and shoved back into his seat opposite the queen.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?" the queen demands.
Cellbit answers her with a snarl and a second attempt at political assassination. This time, though, he's stopped by Roier, who grabs him around the middle with both arms and pulls him to his chest.
Immediately, Cellbit feels his body relax. Damnit.
"I told you you'd be angry," Roier hums.
He slips a hand under Cellbit's shirt and just leaves it splayed across his stomach. The queen looks mildly disturbed. What, is she homophobic, too? Rich and homophobic? Pick a struggle.
"Of course I'm angry," Cellbit sneers. He glares at the queen, who glares right back. "We've been kidnapped."
The queen rolls her eyes. "You aren't being kidnapped. You are being escorted."
"In handcuffs!"
"Yeah!" Roier agrees. "Only I can put my husband in handcuffs!"
The queen's face goes mildly green. Oh, so she is homophobic. Great.
Cellbit, though, groans and slams his head against Roier's shoulder. Roier just grins at him, the piece of shit.
"Well," the queen hesitantly says, "it was either this or ropes."
Roier protests, "Only I can put my husband in ro-"
He cuts himself off with a moan as Cellbit pinches his thigh.
"Cállate," Cellbit huffs. "She doesn't need to know."
"I really don't," the queen agrees, complete with a nod of the head. "You're my brother, I don't want or need to be hearing any of this."
(Not that the 'any of this' is real. The most extreme thing Cellbit and Roier have done in bed is play board games and lose the pieces in their blankets, but it's just so fun to make people uncomfortable.)
"I'm not," Cellbit tells her.
He tilts his head back and looks up at Roier. "Did you know that she thinks I'm the missing Gato Kingdom prince?"
Roier laughs. "What, really? You?"
Cellbit smiles. "I know, right?"
"I'm right here," the queen flatly says. "And you are my brother. His name is Cellbit, your name is Cellbit. You have feline features. Only members of-"
Cellbit finishes her sentence for her: "-the Gato royal family are cat hybrids. I know. But you're wrong."
The queen crosses her arms and her legs, her foot bouncing impatiently on the floor.
"Oh, yeah?" she asks. "How?"
"Because," Cellbit simply says.
Nothing else.
Roier snorts. He adjusts his hold on Cellbit, halfway pulling him onto his lap and hooking his chin over Cellbit's shoulder.
Cellbit looks down at Roier's very un-handcuffed hands and pouts.
"Why aren't you restrained?" he complains.
"Because I haven't tried to kill the queen," Roier smugly says. He pokes Cellbit's nose, making Cellbit go cross-eyed. "This is what you get, pendejo."
"Fuck you," Cellbit grumbles. "You didn't try to fight her a little? For me?"
"Nah. I killed all her knights, though."
Gods.
Cellbit's eyes practically glitter. "Wow. I bet you got real sweaty."
Roier nods. "And I took my shirt off."
Gods!!
Cellbit turns to glare at the queen. "You made me miss that!"
The queen's mouth opens in shock. "You tried stabbing me!"
"And you kidnapped me! I think stabbing you would've been worth it!"
"Calma, gatinho," Roier lightly says. He slips his other hand under Cellbit's shirt; his two hands link together, his thumb rubbing soothing little circles above Cellbit's bellybutton. "Don't threaten royalty when I don't have my sword."
"You aren't being kidnapped!" the queen shouts. "This could've gone a lot easier if you had just come with me to begin with!"
"And why the fuck would I do that?" Cellbit sneers.
"Because I'm your sister, idiot!"
"I'm an orphan, idiot!"
The queen bodily flinches, recoiling into the back of her seat with wide eyes and a trembling mouth.
Sensing a tense moment, Roier takes the opportunity to say, "You know, maybe he isn't your brother. Maybe I'm your brother, hm? Maybe my ears fell off in the war."
It's just the kind of statement that would blow Pepito's mind. Pepito, oh, Pepito...
Cellbit wants his kids.
The queen ignores Roier. She continues staring at Cellbit, instead.
"What happened to you?" she asks, voice hoarse.
Cellbit gives her a flat look in response. "What hasn't. I'm not who you think I am. I'm... me. You have the wrong guy."
He twists his wrists in his handcuffs. They're simple enough...
"This really isn't a good first impression," Roier adds.
As Roier continues speaking, Cellbit pops his thumb out of its socket and starts subtly pulling his hand through the cuff.
Roier says, "Like, I get you wanted to see him, but this is kinda fucked, you know? You couldn't have sent a letter? We could have had brunch, but, noooooo, you just had to show up like this and freak him out."
"I'm not freaked out," Cellbit grumbles.
(And now the other hand...)
"I didn't want it to be this way," the queen says. She looks painedly at Cellbit. "It's- I- we need you back, Cellbit. Our parents- the king and queen are both dead. You promised that you would help me when I took the throne. I've been looking for you for years, and-"
"Okay," Roier interrupts. "See? Talking's good. Gatinho, do you have anything to say?"
"Yeah," Cellbit replies. He looks at the queen, and he says, "Guapito, hold on."
He sticks his tongue out at the queen (childish, maybe, but she's pissing him off), and he slams himself against the carriage door.
And... nothing happens.
He smacks his head, and he sees stars, and he falls backwards onto the carriage's floor with a pained grunt.
The queen gives him a mocking look. "What, you didn't think I would lock the door? You really are my brother, dumbass. You haven't changed a bit."
Roier, at least, looks somewhat pitying.
"That would've been cool if it had worked?" he tries.
Cellbit just groans in response and drops his head back down onto the floor.
He used to be an escape artist. And now he's trapped in a carriage with an insane woman.
"Sit tight," the queen says, settling back into her seat and making sure to kick Cellbit in the side as she does so. "It's a long trip back to the castle."
"If I don't see my children when we're there, I'll actually kill you," Cellbit threatens.
Her lips quirk into a smirk. "You can try."
And he hates her.
#catboy in the village au#a.d.'s fics i suppose#a.d.'s fics i suppose.#this poor guy#i like this au actually
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“My love, my life.”
“We are going to be just fine…”
Max Verstappen x Fem!Reader
PART ONE
Max Corner
Summary: Max and reader crossed the line in their 3 year friendship, resulting in 2 positive pregnancy test. And 1 baby on the way.
Warnings: 18+ you could say smut- but it’s not very ‘Smutty’ maybe if you squint, pregnancy, swearing, Google translate, Lando being Lando, no proof read.
Key: Y/N (your name), Y/L/N (your last name), biscuit= Cookie, Lando and reader are friends for about 4 years.
Word count: 2,949
A/N: Thank you for the votes 🖤 It has motivated me to now write something 🙂 I’m seeing how this goes, I might even turn it into a series. Anddd I love dad max 🖤
The soft moans, and whispers of each others names was all that painted the walls of the vanilla hotel room. Us both sinning beyond hells gates… Something so wrong feeling so right- like we was both made perfectly for each other.
You could say it was the drink… or the pent up sexual attraction we both craved so badly from one another… either way we both bathed in the moment, showing one another what 3 years worth of “friendship” really meant.
The little touches and glances go along way… they turned into flirty comments and kisses so close to the lips if either had tilted our heads we would’ve been where we are now a lot sooner… Tonight, it turned into Max kissing that little more over, lips brushing slightly. Both breathing heavily questioning wether to go in for a second. And I did, I took the chance to grab him by the collar kissing him. Not just the once though, it turned into three or four little kisses before Max was pushing against the wall and shutting the door blindly.
So we could say Max is to blame here, Max is the reason I’m biting down onto my lip, suppressing any noise he is causing me to make- His blue eyes had me pinned, scared to turn away incase I lose this feeling- this intimacy, this entire moment.
Hovering over me, one hand holding my thigh up the other next to my head supporting himself, his bare chest on view, with only smudged lipstick stains coating him. His hair a little messy from my hands running through and tugging on every strand I could. Lips swollen from the rough kisses of need. The warmth in the room from our heavy breathing causing a thin layer of sweat over us both… and even in such a unhinged moment. He still looked perfect.
And after our night of pleasure, and we had both ‘cleaned up’ me putting on one of Max shirts, him sticking to fresh underwear. We left his room, as if we was naughty teenagers, we tiptoed down to my room, climbing into fresh bedding.
Both laying there staring at each other in complete awe, Max hand reaching up and stroking my cheek and along my jaw. Now letting the sleep slowly evade us, with my eyes closed I heard him whisper the three words I’ve always dreamt he would say… wether he did or not it still felt real to me.
“I love you”
And as if it was a reaction to the words I found myself shuffling closer to his chest. Like he was the protection I needed… the knight in shining armour in every princess story.
**3 Weeks later**
Back home, and was things awkward between me and Max? Yes. Very.
Even Lando picked up on the weird tension. Lando also being a close friend and noticing how we was both frightened to go near each other.
For me? It was scared of going near him and pushing him back into a hotel bed all over again… it was scared of getting to close and getting burned in the long run- because Max wasn’t the type of guy to stick around… not after his last breakup everything was fucked and chucked, and me unfortunately was one of them- or so it feels.
I was attending the Monaco GP, in support of Max & Lando them being my only two friends you could say.
However the weekend turned to not be the best of starts, I had picked up a stomach bug somewhere, as I’ve been sick nearly every morning, sometimes of an evening if I really give into the feeling. I realised eating something small like a biscuit would somewhat cure the sickness… it’s been horrible. I texted both Lando and Max saying I would leave my home once I had felt a bit better in myself, both sending back get well soon messages and updates on what’s happening.
I was adamant on attending the qualifying, so chomping down on a biscuit and sipping on a bottle of water I made my way to the GP. In my bag I had a little bag filled with biscuits. I wasn’t going to let a little tummy ache stop me from watching my boys-
I read online that a stomach bug doesn’t seem to be contagious after a few days, which I was praying was true. If not then I could only apologise to them and beg for forgiveness if I ruin their race…
My first stop was Lando, who was practically jumping when he saw me. Bringing me in the most tightest hug you could imagine-
“Lan- don’t I still feel like I could be sick…” mumbling I rub his back before pulling myself away.
“Oh shit- sorry… wait are you contagious?!” He jumped back holding his hands up like they would defend him.
“It says no online… if I am I’m sorry though…” pouting I shuffled about on my feet. “I just wanted to watch you both race-”
Tutting he rubbed my shoulder, before throwing an arm around both. “It’s okay, longs your not sick in here. We just washed the floors.”
Rolling my eyes I elbowed him in the ribs, “I won’t, I got my biscuits.” Patting my bag I smiled up at him. “And anyways if I was sick it’s normally first thing in the morning, or maybe later… if I stop eating these biscuits.” Eyebrows furrowed Lando tilted his head at me.
“First thing in the morning? Sounds like something else to me.” Humming a teasing tone he lead us both out the garage. Shaking my head in annoyance at him I look around. “Behave Lando.”
“I’m just saying-”
And well him just saying that had my mind reeling… what if? I couldn’t just pull out my phone and check when I was due on my ladies, Lando would see, seeing as his attached to my hip, so in my head I counted back. I should’ve started by now right? I doubt it- I think it’s next week.
Before I know it we was stopping outside red bull’s garage Lando practically screamed for Max, all the engineers turning to look up at him. Some in annoyance and some confused to why he was screaming…
And there he was- Max in all his glory shuffling his way through. Suit unzipped and hanging down at his waist, his fireproofs on show… showing every shape of his body- gulping, my eyes started to wander, slowly remembering every part of him I kissed, where the red lipstick marks were, where to touch that would make him shiver and whisper my name in a warning. As if I was triggering a ticking time bomb- I mean you could say I was that night. I was remembering it all in waves, before it was only a faint memory.
“Y/N! You made it finally…” smiling at each other he came and stood infront of us both. His hand brushing my arm slightly in a little pat/rubbing manner. Yeah it was tense… i felt like screaming, if we hadn’t pushed that boundary, it probably wouldn’t feel so awkward- I had the devil on my shoulder, shouting over the little angel, telling me I should just let him have me right here on the track and claim our own trophy, create our own ‘finish’.
Oh what have you done to me Verstappen.
Clearing his throat Lando patted my bag. “Well lets just ignore the awkwardness… She has her biscuits.” Confused Max looked between us both.
“To keep the sickness away.” Finishing Lando’s sentence with another shake of my head and a small smile at Max.
“Ah- makes sense.” Laughing a little Max turned back to the garage. “Lan I think we’re about to start quali”
“I’ll probably be back and fourth between you both- I’m just going to get some more water…” smiling a little at them both I gave a small wave. “Good luck both of you.”
Both quickly giving nods and a thanks, they ran into the garages suits getting pulled up and zipped in the process.
Now finally away from them both I checked my health app, going back to my last period…
Panic rises through me, I have been stressed so maybe it’s on its way- I’ll do a test later just in case but I’m sure it’s stress, or even many other reasonings but the one that makes sense is the one I’m praying against. I mean it’s only a week, so no panic.
But except I am panicking… Maybe I should go do a test now… put my mind at ease-
Quickly heading back out I sent a text to them both to see, incase I wasn’t back-
“Be back soon- wasn’t feeling great again.”
And then I went straight to the chemist…
Looking between test, hands shaking as I try and read the box, I finally gave up taking them both to the checkout, nervously looking around like somehow someone I knew would catch me. The lady behind the till offered a kind smile, which I quickly returned, paying for the tests and rushing out with the bag mumbling a thank you.
I felt sick again- maybe it was nerves who knew- I mean why am I panicking I have been so stressed lately it could be that- but still what if…
Once I got back to my apartment I headed straight to the bathroom fumbling with the test taking a stick from each and doing them both at the same time- Two test can’t lie…
I was pacing, doing circles around my bedroom as I bit down on my nails. Every few minutes sitting on my bed, before pacing again. It wasn’t until my alarm went off was I finally broken out of my trance. I took a few deep breaths and crept into the toilet, standing in the doorway, I rose to my tiptoes craning my neck-
My stomach dropped, and I found myself stumbling into the toilet reading both test, my head going from left to right as I held both sticks…
[2-3 Weeks] and the other [3+ weeks]
There it was the sickness again, dropping to my knees I curled myself around the toilet letting every little bit of sick come up… all the nerves building up in my body and raking through.
When I was finally able to get away from the toilet bowl, I got up brushing my teeth and washing my face… trying to stop the little tears, why am I crying? I’m terrified-
How the fuck do I tell Max?
Feeling sorry for myself, I crawled into my bed breathing in and out slowly… I am absolutely terrified.
Somewhere from my racing mind and the tossing and turning I dozed off only waking up to the sound of my door being nearly knocked down.
Rushing out of bed I head downstairs looking through the peep hole.
“Lando you knock like the police-” muttering I unlock the door letting him in.
“Aren’t you supposed to be at qualifying?” Frowning i move over to the door before turning back to look at him.
“Y/N that finished about an hour ago…” concerned flashed over his face as he brought me into a hug.
“Maybe we should go to the doctors, maybe he can get this sickness sorted…” mumbling he rubbed my back soothingly, rocking us a little.
“I know what it is Lan…” I felt it again the burning in my throat as I tried holding back the tears… my eyes welling up at even the thought.
“I know I know- but maybe he can give you something like an anti-sickness tablet?” I shook my head wiping underneath my nose with my sleeve, hand on the door handle as I went to shut it.
“Oh wait-”
“I’m pregnant…” whispering I covered my mouth hoping that if I trapped the sound it wouldn’t make it real.
Lando’s shock was evident as he stared back, hand in the air still pointing at the door, his mouth creating an ‘o’ shape.
“Did you say pregnant?” A familiar voice was heard that defiantly wasn’t Lando’s.
My head felt like it was going to snap as I looked back at the door, and once again there he was, trying to squeeze himself in the little gap I had left him from trying to shut the door…
My heart pounded as I watched him, hoping he would show some emotion to put my mind at ease but nothing… the silence in the room from us three was unbearable.
“Well congratulations!” Lando grabbed ahold of me again hugging me tight, my eyes were still glued on Max, waiting on anything. But nothing he just stood there frozen. And that somewhat annoyed me more- it was both our faults that I’m in this situation I don’t expect anything from him but the recognition.
Lando pulled away looking between us both with a smile, “So have we got uncle duties? Are you going for an early scan? Who’s the dad?”
Shaking my head at Lando I push past him, trying to get away. I would rather Max saying he doesn’t care there stand there saying nothing at all… “Y/N I didn’t mean to ask so many questions-” Lando was rushing in behind me, before more footsteps were heard and then Max was seen.
“Is it mine?” Eyebrows furrowed, was he angry? He has a right to be angry. I’m angry. Lando bursted out into a fit of laughter smacking Max’s arm “Flirting with each other doesn’t make someone pregnant you idiot.” Now both with confused looks we turned our heads looking at Lando.
“Of course it’s yours.” Shaking my head I looked back at Max.
“Are you sure?”
“What you trying to accuse me of here Max?”
The realisation finally hit Lando as he pointed between us both.
“I’m not accusing you of anything but, I have a right to ask if there had been anyone else don’t you think.”
“Yeah sure because I do that kind of stuff.” Stepping closer he shrugged slightly, which only added fuel to the fire, my voice getting slightly louder.
“Oh come on Max! You’ve known me 3 fucking years.” Tears started spilling down my face, and I couldn’t help it, I couldn’t stop them.
“You guys fucked?!” Once again we both was staring at Lando, merely a few feet away from each other. Both nodding our heads slowly.
“Is that why it’s so fucking awkward to be around you both?!” And once again we both just nodded our heads, both looking lost, like deers in some headlights.
“When did this happen?!” Lando’s hands went in the air as he stepped closer.
“Three weeks ago…” whispering I looked down at my feet.
“None of you told me that something happened. I’m supposed to be yours two friend as well. You were both my friends before each others! I should’ve been told!”
“Because that’s so important right now Lan.” Max glared at him as if he was trying to silence him with his eyes, but if anything that spurred him on more.
“It is to me. That’s just fucking unfair.”
“How is it unfair?! It was a silly drunk mistake Lando. It’s not like we’re hiding a big fucking thing from you. We aren’t together- it was one night.”
“Well Y/N is pregnant now. That’s a big thing?! It’s your baby!”
Sniffling I looked back up at Max. “It was a mistake?” I should’ve know, I somewhat did know but it still stung hearing him say the truth- maybe I was imagining what I heard that night…
Max hands came up tugging at his hair.
“Yeah it was a mistake you should’ve told me!” Lando raised his voice, throwing a tantrum like a child, foot stomping against the floor hands balled into fists.
“You both need to leave.” Turning away I went and sat down on the sofa, hands gripping the edge, trying to hold down any emotions that wanted to show.
“Leave.”
“No we need to talk about this. I can’t do this Y/N!” Max was now moving closer gesturing wildly around.
“I didn’t ask you to do anything Max. Apart from leave.”
“No I want to stay, I want to talk.”
“Talk or scream at each other?” Tilting my head I looked up at him wiping my face. “Like you said it was a stupid mistake. I can deal with it on my own. Now go.” I looked between him and Lando.
“No, I can’t be involved in this stuff Y/N. What about my career?!” Scoffing I stood back up. “Your career?! This stuff?! Two was to blame for that night not just me.” Pushing his chest slightly moving him towards the door, grabbing Lando’s arm on the way who only hissed. Shoving them both out the door, both screaming their own protest but neither stopping me from pushing them away, I went to slam it behind them, only for Max to out his foot in the way.
“We can’t do this Y/N…” it felt as if he was staring into my soul, trying to change my mind on the matter, I wasn’t going to be doing anything stupid over our “stupid mistake”.
“I can… Now leave. And neither of you speak to me… years of friendship for what? Some friends you both are.” Spitting words with venom at them both I slammed the door against Max foot before using all my body weight I pushed against his foot until it slammed shut finally. Max giving up any chance he had to change my mind.
We are going to be just fine…
A/N: So this is part one, as I felt like I was typing for ages and dragging on- it is a bit all confusing I think I had a skim read and I’m confusing myself lollll but this is going to be a little mini series I think, cause it gives me a chance to section everything I want out of this “love” story with Max.
I got the title idea from listening to ABBA 🙂 I was thinking about Max saying it to the baby or something idk we will see when we get there 🖤
Masterlist
#f1 imagine#max verstappen imagine#formula one imagine#imagine#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen x you#max verstappen x y/n
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Thanks so much for telling me that it deleted 😅
Um happy birthday! I was actually gonna ask for time travel drarry this time 😂
Thanks again and have a great day!
a continuation of 1 2 3 4
They’re cautiously moving their way though the chamber, Draco letting him lead with only a minimum of arguing. Harry likes to think that the fact he’s a parselmouth, an auror, and has been here before is compelling, but honestly he thinks Draco agreed just so Harry would be eaten first if something goes wrong.
“You shouldn’t be doing this,” Harry can’t help but say, “we shouldn’t be doing this, I guess, but you started it. We shouldn't be changing anything, especially this far in the past. Who knows what it could mess up?”
Draco scoffs. “Again, how do you think we’re going to make things worse? What sort of future are you worried about preserving anyway?”
“Things are good, now,” he says, and wants to check Draco’s expression but can’t bring himself to stop looking around corners for the first hint of the basilisk.
“For who?” Draco presses. “I don’t know what war you lived through, but the one I did was complete shit.”
“And you could make it even worse by meddling!” he insists. Talking is also probably a bad idea, but with his luck it’ll be his first tell that the basilisk is near by – that he starts hissing rather than speaking. “Things could have gone even more to shit, and now they might, because of you!”
Draco snorts. “Typical. You know, some people actual value the things they lose, and aren’t exactly eager to lose them again.”
Harry stops moving and Draco nearly walks into him before he realizes it. He whirls around, now shoving his wand in Draco’s face. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
“Just because you’re a cliché doesn’t mean you have to throw a fit about it. Clichés are clichés for a reason, after all,” he says in a tone that Harry thinks is actually supposed to be soothing.
He’s not in the mood to be soothed. “I value what I lose.”
“No, you don’t. Your tragedy is tragic, Harry, but it’s not special. All you do is lose so you can’t linger on it. Parents, homes, friends – what’s it mean to lose them to you? You’ve lost them all, multiple times, and you’re just fine.” Draco makes a face, then shrugs. “For a given definition. Because you never think any of it is yours to keep, so the loss can’t hurt as much. Which is fine for you, and all your fucked up problems, but I’m not like you. What I lost is important to me and I’m not fine about it and I’m going to do whatever I can to get it back.”
It's the cruelest thing Draco’s ever said to him and the worst part is how he says it, irritated but casual, like it’s something unremarkable about him that’s obvious to everyone.
Maybe it is.
No wonder he could never get passed the third date with anyone.
Draco crouches down, yanking him against the wall. Harry’s surprised enough to let him. “Do you hear that?”
He almost says no automatically but he takes a second to try and hear something over their breathing.
Well, looks like they found the basilisk.
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Omg please i have a funny!!
ok so all neighbors are involved in Sally's act, it goes wrong and the stage crumbles, everyone ends up falling over. while everyone are saying stuff as "whoosie" and "ouchie", we just lose our filter for a bit and say "son of a bitch"
I need everyone's reaction PLEASE, Wally's so just SWORE!!
I can totally do that!
I am so sorry it took so long :(
🏠 Losing our filter 🏠
Twas a Tuesday afternoon and all of you were getting ready for a play
The entire neighborhood had helped make the stage
That might sound like a good thing, but in reality that just meant that nobody was as focused as they should have been
So y'know there's probably some screws lose somewhere
Anyway back to the play-
Everyone had finished getting ready and were taking their spots on the stage
Until Barnaby saw a squirrel....
Yeah ummm
All hell broke loose
He accidentally knocked the already poorly built stage, and with how big he is it completely came crashing down
...on everyone
It fucking hurt
You were on the ground, stuck under some stuff and trying to recover from the shock
You could hear everyone whining around you
As you tried pushing yourself up one of the wooden planks above you suddenly fell and bonked you on the head
Completely forgetting the innocent puppets scattered around you, you screamed out a series of words so vile I can not repeat them
As you finally got yourself off the ground you looked around you
...They were silently staring at you...
Suddenly realization hit you like a ton of bricks
Or wooden planks
"oh shi...z" you said quietly to yourself
Everyone just continued to stare, wide eyed and mouth agape
After a few awkward seconds Sally started laughing about it
Julie and Barnaby then preceded to join her
Eddie also chuckled to himself a bit
Poppy and Howdy looked like disappointed mothers
Frank... Was just kinda there being frank
And wally was trying to make sure you everyone was okay
You just awkwardly stood there as wally helped you dust yourself off
"Now that was funny"
#tw cursing#welcome home#welcome home x reader#wally darling#wally darling x reader#julie joyful#Julie Joyful x reader#Sally Starlet#Sally Starlet x reader#howdy pillar#howdy pillar x reader#Barnaby B beagle#Barnaby B beagle x reader#poppy partridge#poppy Partridge x reader#Eddie Dear#Eddie Dear x reader#frank Frankly#frank Frankly x reader
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You know what, fuck it: Baldur's Gate 3 Thoughts.
(The world is so so bad right now, can't even name all the bad things, so fuck it, no more bad feels, just some nice garbage right now)
I really love that the big 3 pairings all kinda arrive together:
Lae'zel and Shadowheart are already trapped on the ship together, like they are both trapped by their beliefs. They both know more about what's happening than anyone else and are also perhaps the most frightened.
Astarion and Gale show up stuck and as potential bait. They're both concealing some pretty big problems. The only way to succeed with them is to trust them despite this. And they both badly need to bond with others so they can survive their ordeals.
Karlach and Wyll actually already have a relationship, just one founded on misunderstanding. They can each empathize with each other in ways the others can't and adjust quickly to thinking of a previous adversary as a friend. They both have so much going on that when they arrive on the Sword Coast, they just resettle into business as usual. They've both been misused by those with control over them and seek to break that control, even if that doesn't fix everything, even if it means more loss.
They're all good ships, I love them. And all the other combos are good too, there are no bad options here, but I'm a bit of a sucker for these. Honestly, really appreciate having an entire party of bisexuals. I love that so much <3
Gale and I are the same person ha ha ha FUCK
I do have fic ideas, potentially for Gale & Astarion and Lae'zel & Shadowheart (spoilers below)
Like, I actually have a lot of feelings about Shadowheart being a complete dick to Lae'zel while she goes through a crisis of faith, only to eat pigeon pie later when she gets a crisis of her own.
And I'm obsessed with the idea of Lae'zel learning how to be comforting as she watches Shadowheart crumble apart, as she loses all sense of identity. Because at least Lae'zel has that. Lae'zel lost a lot in parting from Vlaakith, but she didn't lose who she was. Indeed, she left in defense of who she was, in defense of what she knew to be right. Shadowheart doesn't even have that. And it's a wild thing that comes over you, to feel like you've fucked up and lost and to find someone you can actually help. I think it would be a really cool and beautiful thing to see, Lae'zel helping Shadowheart find the pieces of herself. That would just be really, really good.
And then there's Problematic Old Man Yaoi over here
Maybe what I love best about Gale and Astarion is how much fucking WOULD NOT solve it
Like, some people just need to fuck it out and then it's all good, you fixed the issue
And 100% fucking would not solve their shit. Like, it would help, or it certainly wouldn't not help. But it'd only help like... max 20% The rest has to be solved by Talking, Using Your Words, Talking To Other People No Not The Imaginary Conversations, and Admitting When You're Wrong.
I also love that this is true no matter where you think they get together.
Like, let's take Act I: I cannot IMAGINE how Astarion could talk Gale into bed that early. Gale "Never Nude" Dekarios who's never had a crush on anyone who wasn't Mystra. He'd be shaking and fumbling just trying to ask Astarion on a date. And Mr. Emotionally Available over here, who is not ready to be vulnerable in any sense, who uses sex as a crutch because it's so familiar and so easy to dissociate from... yikes, what a combo. Poor Gale would be sent reeling by the hot-cold of it, he'd act insane those first few days after sex as he tries to make sense of how Astarion said yes to everything, but didn't mean it, but also he did? So should he pursue that or leave it be? Is the best choice to let Astarion thaw in his own good time or obsessively work on cracking this because Astarion clearly needs help and just doesn't want to ask for it? Stupid question, OBVIOUSLY the second! I... instant explosion. God, it would go so bad.
Honestly, the good version is Gale resists the invitations and instead Astarion sulks for a few days over his blue balls or just fucks someone else, thus giving Gale a new case of mixed signals to obsess over. Jesus, we're just never going to escape that are we? Wizards gotta fixate.
Act II: In which Astarion chooses to ignore his own problems by instead arguing with Gale about his. Not because he's invested, merely because Gale is clearly being an idiot. Gale at first demurs, refusing to be argued out of his guilt, but then when Astarion becomes more insistent, counters with why Astarion cares so much? This would inevitably erupt in some kind of sexual encounter, but the fighting wouldn't stop because despite getting laid, Gale is still sure he's right and Astarion is still sure he's right. Dick actually can't solve this today. The camp mournful of ever finding a solution, they would like to sleep peacefully again someday.
Act III: Make or break time. Both Gale and Astarion escalate as the threat of death or destruction looms ever nearer. Gale now just as dead set on stopping Astarion from destroying himself as Astarion is on stopping Gale from destroying himself. Same threat, very different outcomes. Gale keeps looking at him with those damn puppy eyes and whining about "he'll regret it instantly" and "hate who he becomes" and "I can't stand to see that happen to you" or whatever. Obnoxious. And Astarion keeps trying to convince him that Mystra was wrong, that she "manipulated and groomed" him and "didn't even give an explanation" which he's owed, or some such nonsense. As if an inhuman, all-powerful goddess was out of line for being afraid of mortal actions... wait, was that a logical inconsistency? Damn.
I think Gale would convince Astarion first. I think deep down Astarion would hate to be a full vampire too much, I think they both know it, and when Gale promises to stand by him, to take care of him, to always protect him... As much as Astarion doesn't want to trust, knows he's a fool for trusting, he agrees. He won't do it. He won't take the power. Because, damn him, he believes Gale.
And what would suck is Gale would go "Cool! I'mma become a god, I can protect you way better then!" like entirely missing the point. And Astarion would be galled, deservedly so, by the hypocrisy. But Gale's so caught up in how sure he's right and how sure he's wrong, he's not even listening. I think it'd piss Astarion off so much, he'd convince the whole camp to kidnap Gale so he can't go sacrifice himself, full "He won't get the chance to kill himself because I'll do it first!" Until we finally get to the Nether Brain and... Astarion lets him go. Because that's the point. Trust isn't real if there isn't a choice. And as much as he hates the fact that Gale might choose what he doesn't want, he has to let him do it on his own. And I think that'd finally break through. That simple act of trust and sacrifice and playing willing to lose would finally make Gale go "Oh... oh god, what was I thinking? This isn't right." The fact that Astarion loves him more for the flawed and fallible person he is than for the heartless god he could become... That would finally make Gale see, Mystra was wrong all along and she never loved you because she can't really love. Not like that.
Yeah. That's a personal favorite of mine.
But there's also a lot to be said for post-end, Astarion with nowhere to go and Gale going "You know... I've heard of spells that allow creatures form the Underdark to safely experience sunlight. We could try some of those, I don't see why they shouldn't work on you." and Astarion being floored and not even having the words for everything he feels at that offer. And then the raw sexual tension of living in his tower together as "friends" as Astarion mercilessly pines and Gale blissfully carries on, unaware until Tara finally goes "That's it! I can't take it any more! I'm going to live with your mother until you two sort this out!" and flies off. Leaving Gale to go "Huh... wonder what she meant by that?"
Meanwhile, Astarion can hardly stand to be in the same room with Gale because he ends up basically drooling and yet, he can hardly stay away, staring obsessively from the shadows, creeping around wherever he is, looking exactly like the jealous lover he longs to be.
Also, Astarion and Gale's mother! Oh, I can't wait! Too funny!
Oh, tower days with Astarion would be so good as he tries to adjust to having a life again. A slow, painful process, but very deserved. He'd need an occupation, he can't have nothing to do. Maybe he can look into magistrating again?
Anyway, there's some thoughts. I haven't finished Act III yet, but I'm close so I guess careful with those Act III spoilers.
Also, for anyone still reading, if you want to do me a solid: There exists somewhere a Bloodweave fic where Astarion walks in on Gale with a construct of himself only there's a twist... and the author is Very Correct about this twist. if you know, you know. But I can't find this fic anywhere! Please help a girl out if you've read the one I'm thinking of.
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Pregnant sex with Grandmaster Bi-han👀? I whole heartedly believe he would be obsessed with the body carrying his heir, despite reader being self conscious of their changing body😏
He would be gentle physically, but he is still demanding and authoritative in his speech.
anon i love you. i could kiss you for this one. little deviation with the gentleness but still Bi Han.
Word Count: 1.6k
Warnings: pregnancy smut, Bi Han calls his wife slut/whore in his mind 18+ MDNI
No one would regard Bi Han as a calm person. He was known for his quite frigid exterior but his wife was the only one he was somewhat normal with. Currently, he was sitting in his bedside chair while his wife paced their bedroom floor. He wasn't quite sure what was wrong with her. At first, he thought it was the pregnancy stressing her out, after all, she was six months along. Her mini twists were pulled away from her face and she was dressed in a robe of Bi Han's signature color.
"Wife, perhaps you should calm down," He offered. The face she made in response told him that was the wrong thing to say.
"Calm down? You want me to calm down," She spoke with venom on her tongue. Bi Han wasn't quite sure what he did to piss her off but he was sure it was his fault.
"It's just hormones," Bi Han offers as he goes to touch her stomach.
"Hormones, he says. There is a baby, your baby, growing inside of me. I am tired all of the time, my boobs are swollen, none of my robes fit the way they used to, and you will not touch me. My husband will not touch me," Her voice broke on the last part as she was trying to stop tears from flowing down her brown cheeks.
"Y/N," Bi Han tried softly, this was new to him. Normally, if someone cried in front of him, he'd simply walk away or roll his eyes. That would not work in this case.
"Are you not attracted to me now? I should've known. All you care about is your precious heir," Y/N sniffled and moved away from her husband.
"Y/N, I have always been attracted to you. The only thing stopping me from completely ravaging you is our child growing in you, and I do not want to lose control," Y/N felt some relief in his words, but it still did nothing for the feeling of not being wanted. It did nothing for what felt like the constant heat that was growing inside of her.
"I care not for your control," Y/N said looking at her husband with teary eyes. She was horny in the worst way imaginable. Bi Han had not touched her since she was about two months along. She had tried everything to rid herself of this desire but her fingers could only do so much.
"I do not want to hurt you," Bi Han repeated slowly while wiping his face.
"You will not fuck your wife?" Y/N stated bluntly with a raised eyebrow.
"Fine, I will find someone who will," Y/N heads towards the door of their chambers before Bi Han grabs her wrist. He is careful not to hurt her but his grip is tight and she couldn't escape if she tried.
"You will do no such thing." He all but grunted out.
"You don't tell me-" Y/N began to speak but Bi Han yanked her closely. He took a second to deeply inhale, almost calming down, before speaking.
"If you think I'd let another man touch you while you are carrying my child, you do not know me well, wife," His eyes had glazed over with desire. How dare she? What kind of Grandmaster would he be to allow that?
"Bi Han?" Y/N spoke, looking into his eyes. She was not scared of what he would do to her, but rather what he would do to her pussy.
"Get on the bed since you want to be fucked so bad," He freed her from his grip and watched her stumble on the bed. She sat on the edge facing him. He walked over to her with heavy steps and stood between her legs.
"I am going to make this very clear, I think of fucking you every night," He said, tilting her chin up so he could kiss her passionately. His hand was on her jaw and her hands found their way to his hair. She undid his bun, allowing his dark waves to fall freely.
"Your breasts are swollen so that you will feed my child well," He said as he kneeled at the edge of the bed. He undid her robe and allowed it to fall under her. He stopped for a moment to take in his wife's beauty. She was right, her breasts had grown in size but that did not matter. She had gained stretchmarks but that did not matter. To Bi Han, she was more glorious than ever carrying his child. Mindful of his body temperature, he began to kneed Y/N's breast with one hand and put his mouth on the other. Y/N sighed with relief almost immediately.
"Maybe I have been a bit neglectful in my caution," Bi Han says once he notices the reaction he has garnered from Y/N just by the littlest of touches.
"A bit?" Y//N chuckles while looking at her husband.
"Lay back," Bi Han placed two pillows behind Y/N. One behind her head and another a little above her hips.
Bi Han kneeled once more and messily put his hair half up with one of the hair ties he stole from Y/N. He spread her legs, taking in how wet he made her with just sucking her tits. He almost felt bad for how long he had gone without doing this. It's too bad Y/N didn't know that Bi Han would leave bed every other night, just to stroke himself without disrupting her sleep.
He started with kisses on her inner thighs as he pulled her hips closer to his mouth. One finger ghosted her clit and Y/N's breath had hitched. She almost felt like a virgin again. His lips latched to her clit as two fingers began to coax an orgasm from her. Y/N's hands gripped the sheets as his tongue played with her clit and his fingers moved quicker and quicker.
"Bi Han," She moaned softly.
He chuckled at the praise as he continued his motions. He began to curl his fingers in her as he licked her clit. In all honesty, he was in heaven right now. Knowing that his wife could be completely subdued by his actions, was almost enough to get him off.
"Baby," Upon hearing the name, he knew that his wife was close. She rarely referred to him outside of his name. He continued his practices, careful to listen to her moans and whines over the sounds of him eating her pussy.
Y/N could feel her orgasm building but this one felt different. It felt like she was holding something back. When Bi Han's fingers hit her g-spot, she couldn't keep it any longer. She squirted onto Bi Han's fingers and mouth with a loud whine. Her chest heaved up and down as her hands finally released their grip on the sheets. One of her hands rested on her stomach.
"I will admit, I have missed that," Bi Han said shedding his pajama pants, allowing for his dick to spring free. He removed his shirt soon after revealing a dark happy trail. His dick slapped his thigh as it bounced while he stood to be at his wife's entrance. There was a prominent vein that ran on the underside, and his mushroom head was a pale shade of pink.
"Y/N, you will tell me if you are in discomfort," He said while lining his tip with her pussy. It took all of his discipline not to rush in, but it had been some time since his wife had taken him last. Y/N simply nodded, finally excited she was getting what she had been craving.
Slowly, inch by inch, he entered her pussy. He had missed the comforting warmth as her wetness dripped onto their sheets. Y/N's back had arched off of the bed when Bi Han had entered her fully. He gave her a minute to adjust to him stretching her walls.
"Fuck me, please," She hadn't needed to ask twice before something in Bi Han snapped. He withdrew his hips from hers before slamming back into hers harshly.
Y/N's legs rested on his shoulders as he drilled into her. Y/N couldn't fathom why she hadn't threatened to sleep with someone else sooner. The stinging from his hips hitting her ass would be felt in the morning, but right now it felt divine. Bi Han watched his wife's face contort with every stroke and smirked, knowing only he could make her feel like that.
Bi Han was not relenting in his strokes either. Since his wife wanted to be fucked, he'd fuck her like the slut that she was. Right now, she was not his wife, but just some whore who is carrying his child. He refused to finish before her but it was getting harder with how her pussy was gripping him. Each stroke became more and more difficult as Y/N got closer to cumming.
With one final exasperated moan, Y/N came once more. Her legs felt like jello and Bi Han's hips stuttered as he finished too. He filled her with his warm cum once again. He pulled out and watched it dribble out of her pussy just a little bit.
"Do you feel better wife?" Bi Han asked grabbing his wife's chin so that he could look her in the eye.
"Mhm," Y/N responded with a small smile. Her eyes had glazed over and she was in bliss from her orgasm.
Bi Han grabbed a few extra blankets from their closet and situated the bed so they could fall asleep. He knew that Y/N was always sleepy after sex, mainly because he was sure to wear her out. Y/N fell asleep on her side, and Bi Han spooned her as the couple fell into a somewhat normal state. After this night, Bi Han was sure to fuck Y/N regularly so that she would no longer complain because a happy wife, is a happy life.
#x black!reader#black!reader#x black reader#black reader#bi han smut#mk bi han#mk sub zero#sub zero mk1#mk 1#bi han x reader#bi han#c-nstantine
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My Worthless Love || Part One
Summary: At first, Dean can’t believe his luck that he gets to date a porn star, but soon the cracks start to show, and Dean gets to see a totally different side to the industry that bursts his bubble and leaves him torn.
Rating: 18+
Part Tags: flirting, teasing, mentions of one night stands, fluff, mentions of being uncomfortable with attention, mentions of smut, watching porn, hints of masturbation, mentions of step father/daughter roleplay
Part WC: ± 2.7K
A/Ns: Hope you enjoy this flangsty mini commissioned by Tina :)
My Worthless Love Masterlist || Read Parts 2-5 when you sub to my site/Patreon!
Dean’s POV
“Holy fucking shit, dude,” Dean gasps out, as he straightens up from taking his shot at the pool table and doesn’t even notice that the white ball goes nowhere near the stripe he could’ve easily potted.
“You okay there, boss?” But Dean ignores Justin for a moment, still too captivated by the girl he’s just laid eyes on, watching her seem to effortlessly glide from the doorway to the bar. “Seriously?”
This snaps Dean’s attention back to his employee, frowning slightly at the look of amusement on Justin’s face.
“What?” he pries, taking his eyes off of the blonde for a brief second to look for the girl again and make sure she hasn’t just completely disappeared into thin air; that would be just his luck.
“I know you’re my boss, but keep dreaming, man,” Justin laughs, stepping up to the table to take advantage of Dean’s distraction.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Dean presses, frowning at him. “You think a girl like her wouldn’t be interested in me?”
“I know a girl like her wouldn’t be interested in you,” Justin scoffs. “Anyway, isn’t she like, half your age?”
“How old do you think I am, dude?” Dean asks, amused.
“Old enough to be her dad by the looks of it,” Justin teases with a smug grin, potting another ball. Dean hasn’t been counting how many that is now.
“Fuck you,” Dean grunts, mildly insulted but more so totally captivated by the pretty girl still standing at the bar, talking to the bar man who is clearly very shameless in his flirting. So Dean’s not the only man she’s having this affect on – that does complicate things a little. Competition is always a challenge. “I’m gonna wipe the floor with you, then go and buy her a drink and prove you wrong.”
“Good luck with that,” Justin laughs, a smug grin lighting up his face, and as Dean’s eyes land back on the pool table, he realises Justin’s almost cleared the table himself.
Dean rolls his shoulders back and tells himself to focus on the game – if nothing else to knock his cocky employee down a peg or two – and takes his turn, this time potting all the balls he intends to, until only the black remains, and he looks up to flash Justin a wink before potting it. Justin rolls his eyes in an over-exaggerated fashion, but doesn’t seem too put out that he’s lost. Justin always loses to Dean, but the kid is getting better the more Friday nights they spend playing.
“You might’ve beaten me, but I can’t wait to see you fail at the next part,” Justin smirks from behind his beer bottle before finishing it. “Y’know, she looks kinda familiar, you are okay with my sloppy seconds, right, boss?”
“If I wasn’t, there’d be no one in this state left to fuck,” Dean retorts, flashing Justin a sarcastic smile and patting his shoulder condescendingly, making Justin laugh loudly.
“Hey, I learned from the best,” Justin tries to argue back. “Fixing a car isn’t the only thing you’ve taught me, y’know.”
“Nah, I’m pretty sure you already had ‘manslut’ in your resume before I hired you,” Dean argues, before making his way over to the bar.
He clears his throat and runs his fingers through his hair before he’s gotten too close, and manages to just about slide into the gap between her and the man standing with his back to her talking to a friend. He briefly glances over at her, noticing she’s just as gorgeous, if not more, up close, and clears his throat as he waits to be served. When he catches her looking his way, he gives her a sweet smile, but she doesn’t hold his gaze long enough for him to strike up a conversation, so he thinks on his approach another minute or two longer.
His fingers begin to drum nervously on the bar top as he notices the barman approaching them, and he realises he’s running out of time.
“What can I get you?”
“Urm, two beers and… I’m feeling generous, so whatever this pretty lady beside me wants,” Dean forces a smile, mentally cursing himself for the terrible move.
“Oh, I’m fine,” she insists, “but thank you.”
Fuck.
The barman nods, moving away to get the beers, and Dean clears his throat. “Sorry, didn’t wanna seem like a weirdo, just figured I’d be nice, buy a lonely lady a drink.”
“No, it’s fine, it’s not weird,” she tells him softly. “I’m just still drinking this one,” she explains.
“Alright,” Dean nods, admitting defeat. He fucked it from the moment he opened his mouth. He let Justin get into his head. He doesn’t deserve to land someone like her now, anyway, even if it does mean he has to spend the rest of the evening listening to Justin tell him he told him so.
“You mean that’s it?” she presses, frowning at him.
Dean frowns back, now completely confused by what’s happening, barely thanking the barman when two bottles of beer are placed in front of him.
“Not gonna persuade me?”
“Do you… want me to persuade you?” Dean asks carefully, now completely lost.
“No,” she replies simply. “Just most men would,” she shrugs.
Dean finds his way through the confusion just enough to consider maybe he’s not completely blown it after all.
“I’m not most men, sweetheart,” he laughs, softly. “Anyway, have a good night.”
He smiles at her once again and grabs the beers, forcing himself not to look back at her reaction to his exit as he returns to the pool table and sees Justin has already set up the next game; clearly having no faith in Dean’s attempt to not be returning.
“Knew you’d blow it,” Justin scoffs, taking his beer from Dean’s grasp.
“I wouldn’t be so sure about that,” Dean replies confidently, grabbing his pool cue. “I’ll break.”
“Dude,” Justin whispers, glancing over Dean’s shoulder.
Dean turns his head to see the girl from the bar approaching, outstretching her hand to offer him the beer in her grasp.
“For me?” he asks, confused.
She shrugs, playing with the straw in whatever girly drink is in her grasp and clears her throat. “Just to say thanks for not being a creep,” she tells him softly.
“Oh, you’re welcome,” he nods, smiling nervously. “Urm, I’m Dean, by the way.”
“Y/N,” she replies, biting her bottom lip softly before glancing over at Justin. “I’ll leave you to your night.”
“No, it’s okay, Justin was actually just leaving, he’s gotta open up shop tomorrow,” Dean smiles, looking over at Justin pointedly. Justin frowns deeply and grumbles under his breath, reaching for his jacket.
“He’s old enough to be your father, by the way,” he grumpily points out to Y/N as he passes her, shooting Dean a smug grin when she’s not looking, and Dean rolls his eyes.
“I’m not,” he insists, hoping that hasn’t scared her off.
“I’m used to older guys,” she shrugs. “So, I’ve seen you get a few good shots on this thing tonight, mind showing me a trick or two?” she asks, biting her bottom lip again.
“Sure,” Dean nods, suddenly a little nervous but a whole lot excited he didn’t screw up that badly.
Three Weeks Later
“I’m not joking, Dean, it was horrible,” she stresses, even though there’s still a laugh in her voice.
“I don’t know, it sounds pretty funny to me,” Dean insists, laughing along. She glares at him playfully, and then looks back ahead of them as they continue to walk the length of the riverside.
“Can you believe this is our third date, already?” Y/N asks, clearly trying to change the subject.
“I think Justin is in more disbelief than I am,” Dean smirks. “The guy was adamant I couldn’t get your attention at the bar that night.”
“A guy like Justin couldn’t get my attention,” she corrects, scoffing.
“He’s convinced that you two have…” Dean trails off, realising that’s a really inappropriate thing to bring up.
“Really?” she frowns. “No, I don’t know him,” she insists, shaking her head instantly.
“I didn’t think so,” Dean rushes to remedy. “I mean, I would believe it from someone like him, but I didn’t… I don’t want you to think I would think of you… I… I shouldn’t have said anything, I’m sorry. He just said he recognised you and, he can’t keep track of… it doesn’t matter,” Dean flusters.
But he’s pretty sure he’s upset her, because the smile has completely gone from her face, and now she’s worrying her bottom lip with her teeth in the way Dean’s learned she does when she’s anxious.
“I’m sorry,” he apologises again. “Forget I said that, please?” he begs.
She clears her throat and nods her head, so Dean tries to relax again and focus on the great third date they were having, and all the hopes he’d had for this going finally somewhere remotely close to a bedroom. But now he’s pretty sure he’s blown that, at least.
“Oh shit,” some guy drunkenly slurs as they begin to pass a bar. “I know you!” He points straight at Y/N who suddenly seems very uncomfortable with the entire situation. “Where do I know you from?” he asks, frowning in confusion.
“That’s a really shitty way to hit on a woman on a date,” Dean calls over, laughing at the guy’s feeble attempt.
“No, I know her,” he continues to insist.
“You’re drunk, dude,” Dean points out the obvious, noticing Y/N getting more and more uncomfortable with the unwanted attention. He moves to stand the other side of her, between her and the drunk man, and puts his arm around her to offer her some comfort, before moving them on swiftly. “Are you okay?” he asks, as soon as they’re out of earshot.
“Fine,” she insists, “I don’t know what that was.”
“He’s drunk, he probably just wanted to hit on you,” Dean shrugs.
“Yeah, probably,” she laughs awkwardly, nodding her head. “I just hate the attention,” she explains, hugging herself.
“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, sweetheart, but you do get a lot of it from men. One even walked into a door earlier,” Dean chuckles softly at the memory. “I know you can’t help it, but us men go a little stupid over girls as attractive as you.” But Y/N seems uncomfortable with the praise, so Dean decides to drop it, and clears his throat. “Do you wanna go somewhere private? My place isn’t far from here,” he offers.
“Urm,” she stops, not looking him in the eye as she instead looks out over the river. “I know it’s our third date and there’s certain… expectations that come with that, but I think I wanna just go home, I’m sorry,” she tells him awkwardly.
“No, yeah of course,” Dean reassures her. “I didn’t… I didn’t mean that,” he insists. While it had been on his mind most of the evening, after what had just happened, he was genuinely offering her refuge and a drink, but he understands how she might have taken it, and now he feels like an even bigger idiot than he did when he brought up Justin. “Listen, I had a great night, regardless how it ends, I just want you to know that,” he tells her.
“Me too, Dean,” she smiles. “Sorry, I think I’m just tired.”
“It’s fine,” Dean insists, shaking his head because an apology isn’t necessary. “Let me get you a cab.”
He steps out towards the road and lifts his hand to flag down a cab, and as one pulls up to them, he smiles down at her.
“Thanks, Dean, I’d like to do this again if you’re still interested,” she tells him timidly.
“Yeah, I’d love to. I’ll text you,” he nods with a small smile.
He’s surprised to see her rock up onto her toes and press her lips to his, and he kisses back for a brief second before she pulls away and gets into the cab beside them. He waves her off once she’s safely inside, and exhales heavily as he watches the cab drive away. Well he didn’t completely fuck it up, which is something he supposes, but he can’t help but think how weird it is that she gets so uncomfortable by male attention, and how reserved she seems to be regarding anything physical.
As Dean begins his walk home he wonders if maybe she’s had a bad experience in the past, or maybe she has no experience at all. She is only twenty one, so it’s not a far cry that she could still be a virgin, and it would make sense why she seems closed off about things. But Dean also can’t help but feel like there’s something she’s not told him yet, like there’s a part of her he’s yet to see, and he wonders if that has anything to do with it.
Dean sighs as he grabs a fresh beer from his fridge and begrudgingly heads towards his bedroom alone, thinking about his high hopes earlier that evening when he was leaving his bedroom, freshly showered and dressed for his date with Y/N, excited by the prospect of her coming back to his place with him. He’d even changed the bedsheets, and sprayed a lot of air freshener around the place. He’d tidied up and made sure there were condoms in his nightstand, and he’d even been out and bought the wine she had ordered the last two times they’d been on dates before. Dean had even gone as far as to not deal with the issue that arose in the shower when thinking about Y/N and what their evening might entail. He didn’t want to waste it on the shower floor, after all.
So now, understandably, he’s a little pent up.
He grabs his laptop as he heads into his bedroom and slumps down onto his bed, taking a swig of beer as he opens up the computer and spurs it to life. Like muscle memory he loads the internet and types in the first few letters of his favourite site, his laptop already filling in the blanks and all he has to do is press enter to be taken there.
Placing his beer down on the nightstand, Dean clears his throat and ensures he’s a little more comfortable in his place as he scrolls the homepage looking at the featured video thumbnails until something sticks out to him. And something finally does. Not his usual type, judging by the title of the video, but there’s something about the glimpse of the girl in the thumbnail that’s appealing to him tonight.
Summer Swallows coerced by Step-Daddy when mother leaves town
Dean’s never really been one to choose this kind of thing, but maybe he’s getting too bored of his regular entertainment, anyway. Maybe it’s about time he spiced things up a little. He clears his throat and readjusts himself once more, clicking play and watching the titles play out. Already bored, he cuts to five or so minutes in, glad it’s the trimmed version and not the full forty minute version the site is advertising if you pay for it. It cuts to an upshot of the man’s face, twisted, his lip caught between his teeth as he groans and stares down his body, and then the camera cuts to the girl playing his step-daughter, on her knees and pleasing him with her mouth, and Dean sits up straight, his eyes widening as he blindly fumbles for his cell on the nightstand and pauses the video right there on her face.
“Sammy?” he chokes out. “You won’t believe what I’ve just found.”
Please let me know what you think of this fic! Feedback is the fuel to writers' fires! My anon is on if you'd prefer to leave feedback anonymously!
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#my worthless love#dean x reader#mini series#dean winchester#smut#angst#fluff#supernatural fanfic#spn fanfic#negans-lucille-tblr
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borrowing showers past bedtimes
remember the little thing i wrote the other day about v borrowing kerry's shower? yeah i finished it, somewhat, decided it was still relatively short (2k) and too plotless for an ao3 post. so woe, fic be upon ye. (under the cut)
It seemed like it took forever until V’s incessant knocking on Villa Eurodyne’s front door got it to swing open.
Speaking of the door, when the fuck did Kerry even get his front door fixed anyway? They had tried to fix it on a random weekend when V came over, but it kept opening stubbornly no matter what they did. And then Kerry had gotten so mad and tried to rip the door of its hinges, so they dropped the effort altogether. And–
“Oh, shit.” Kerry’s voice brought him back to the present and V blinks to realize Kerry’s looking at him with wide eyes. He pulls down his headphones he had on to his neck. His previous annoyance at being bothered in his house at this hour slipping rapidly into shocked worry at the sight of a merc covered in blood and mud and who knows what else, standing with his arms and feet a shoulder apart.
“Hey Ker, wha‘sup, sorry for bargin’ in so late at night,” V says, words stumbling over the other like a trainwreck, then he gets to the point, “Can I please borrow your shower?”
“Jesus, of course,” Kerry says, and then jerkily opens the door wider like he just remembered he could do that.
“‘m not Jesus, I’m V.” V mumbled out absent-mindedly. He whacks his arm before he gets in, some blood and bits of flesh fell off the sleeves of his jacket, squelching to the floor.
“Do you need a ripper?” Kerry asked. V drags his feet onto the concrete in hopes it’ll lessen the blood stains when he walks in the house.
“Oh, nah, I’m fine. This isn’t mine.” V says, just realizing how this must’ve looked. “I’ve been out the whole day in the rain, went from the badlands then back, got a gig near here.” V walked further into the house, avoiding the items still strewn about the floor. “Got messy. Normal shootout stuff, grenades, the like, then just–” he makes a psh-SHOOO noise with his mouth as he creates an over-exaggerated motion of an explosion with his hands.
“Gonk had a grenade on him and pulled the wrong pin.”
Kerry lets out an amused, morbid chuckle. V thinks that’s nice; he’d probably laugh about it too. If he hadn’t spent the entire day being scorched and sweating under the Badlands sun, hit by dust and dirt. Then got whacked with a storm that came out of nowhere. Then trekked his way up here just to get blasted in the face with someone’s guts. He smelled like garbage and felt so grossed out, but he was still ready to spend the entire ride back to Watson feeling like complete shit… only to find that the earlier shootout had blown off his Yaiba’s fuel tank.
But yeah, he’s fine! He’s totally not gonna lose it if he can’t claw his way out of his clothes within the next 5 minutes. But just in case, he excuses himself to the shower and practically ran in.
–
V's buck-ass naked in Kerry's shower. It's a huge shower, taking up 30% of the entire bathroom and the bathroom itself is bigger than his apartment. And now the large space and the great ventilation is getting him cold. He rubs a foot on top of the other, trying to warm the palms of his feet. He goes to pick up another soap from the rows and rows of product that Kerry had, all lined up.
It took less time to decide on a shampoo to use earlier because there were only two options, and even though he should probably peruse the purple shampoo dedicated to keep hair dye to shine and all that... he had decided to use the one Kerry probably forgot at the back. It had dust on its lid but smelled powdery.
Johnny crackles, all blue pixels and blurs of light, leaning on the glass window next to him. "Occupied, asshole." V says, gesturing to himself. "Also, ever heard of privacy?"
"You lost your privacy rights the second you took longer than 10 minutes to decide on a soap to use. At least start the water. This isn't your megabuilding, Kerry can pay the hot water bills."
Johnny made a good point, but V opted to ignore Johnny for now, as he often does. Instead, he opens another soap bottle and sniffs it experimentally. He could tell this was Kerry's go-to soap. Smelled like mint and perfumed musk. He reads the name of the scent. Gold Desire.
"Oh fucking... his pretentious ass needs a beating." Johnny grumbles. V snorts and closes the bottle. It's a scent reminiscent of Kerry, which V doesn't hate, of course. But the idea of smelling like Kerry didn't sit right with him.
A little too domestic. A little like he's playing pretend as someone's cute little input who's enjoying the high life for years by now. A little too much like wearing a costume. He's already had enough of the idea of turning into someone he's not without a stupid soap doing it for him.
He goes to sniff the next soap and dry-heaves. It smelled overwhelmingly like burning plastic that's vaguely presented with artificial strawberry and vanilla. He coughs and puts it away.
“At this point your clothes are gonna finish being washed before you do.” Johnny complains, glitching away and popping up, squatting on top of the washing machine dramatically.
V picks up another soap, “Oh Johnny, gross, you cummed in this one.”
“I what.”
“Look, ‘Rockerboy’s Wet Dream.’” V says, grinning and showing off a green bottle. Johnny rolls his eyes and pretend-flicked his cigarette’s ash onto the floor.
V continues to read the bottle, “’Citrus and Red Chili.’ Wonder how that smells combined.” V sniffs it, “Spicy!” he announced to Johnny who has now resorted to softly banging his head on the wall behind him. V decided he could just use this one and goes to turn the water on.
He enjoys how it immediately produced the perfect temperature without him even needing to fiddle with the settings or wait. Some fancy tech that detects his temperature and automatically sets the most suitable one for him once his feet hit the shower tiles.
He pours a hefty amount, wincing at how the bottle wheezed and dropped a slimy gel-like substance with beads of scrubs– which hurt when he started to slather it up. Before the contact with skin promptly starts to burn. Granted he has never used a high-end soap with an exfoliator and whatnot, but V doubts it’s supposed to hurt this much.
V picks the bottle up again to inspect it, hoping to see if maybe he’s just using it wrong or something… when he noticed a manufacture date at the top of the cap. He froze in fear. “Holy shit. This was produced before I was even born. Why the hell do Kerry even keep this around.”
He chucks the bottle to the trash bin to the far end of the room. It missed and hit the wall, bouncing onto the floor. V scrubs the rest of the offending soap on him, almost panickedly.
“You can shower with my actual cum, ‘ll hurt less.” Johnny offers mockingly, getting in the stall with him. V elbows him hard, even if he glitches away before it made any believable contact.
“Give it a couple second and you’ll feel the burn too, see if you can joke then.” V grumbles. He takes a long deep breath and spends the next few breaths just watching as the bubbles get washed along with the grime and mud that starts to melt onto the floor along with the hot water. Shoulders slowly slumping as the events of the day start to catch up and some new bruises and cuts make their presence known. He cards his fingers onto his hair and plop goes the pieces of brain matter and what could’ve been an eighth of an eye. He kicks it down the drain, and blindly takes a random bottle.
This one’s still filled to the brim. He opened it to find it still sealed, even. He struggles to open it with his nails and managed to do so... sacrificing some nail paint in the process. He sniffed it almost dejectedly. Before perking up, pleasantly surprised with its unfamiliar but sweet scent.
"Huh.." he says, taking it away to properly read what it was. "Coconut and basil."
"Do you even know what a coconut looks like?" Johnny accused, out of nowhere.
"Sure I do. It's brown, kinda round looking. Floats. Not sure what a basil actually is though." V answers easily, and finally sets the soap next to the shampoo he had picked, and gets to showering in peace.
--
V stepped out of the bathroom feeling like an actual human again for once, shaking his hair onto the towel roughly to dry it.
"Ker?" he calls out. He hears a faint tune being repeatedly played and walks to the far end of the first floor. Kerry sat with his back to V, with his headphones in, frowning at a computer. He had a guitar in one hand while his other hand was covering his mouth, a finger tapping onto his lips.
Kerry glanced over when he noticed V in his peripheral vision and says, "Hey," but his focus quickly turns back to the computer.
V steps next to him to plant a kiss on the top of his head. "Thanks for the shower." (He could feel Johnny rolling his eyes, making pretend-barfing motions. V made a huge point to tell him to fuck off.)
"No problem," Kerry says, obviously still distracted.
"Busy?" V asks, knowing the answer but thinking he should probably still ask it.
Kerry doesn't really answer, just hums vaguely, somewhat affirmatively.
V spreads his toes out on the floor, feels that it’s dusty, still haven’t been properly vacuumed since god knows when. He shifts his weight. "... Anything I can help with?" He offers. It's a long shot but sometimes Kerry asks his opinion on song lyrics, even though V kinda guessed it's less of asking an opinion and more of showing off an unfinished piece he’s still proud of.
As he expected, the shot fell short of its mark when Kerry replies with a clear, resounding, "No." and by then V knows he's maxed out trying to get a conversation out of Kerry.
He goes to leave Kerry alone.
–
V checks his clothes to see it had finished its spin cycle and is now being dried. Still a couple hours to go. He goes back out and climbs to the second floor, trying to find something to wear in the meantime. Kerry’s a little shorter than him, (“Not by much.” Johnny annoyingly pointed out.) Fine, Kerry’s only a little shorter than him, but his clothes mostly consisted of leather or something so cropped, might as well just go nude.
There were some hoodies, though, large unassuming jackets Kerry bought in bulk to hide from media vultures. Big enough it makes his boxers look shorter than it actually is. V decides to borrow one, goes to bite and suck one of the hood’s strings immediately once he slipped it on.
He leans over the second floor to check up on Kerry from above. Kerry tapped the space bar so hard V swears it’ll crack. He starts grumbling unhappily, then goes to fiddle another tune on the guitar. Yikes. Better leave him alone for now.
“Derivative!” Johnny yells about the tune, over the railing.
If Kerry could actually hear him there would be a bloodbath.
V passed Kerry’s bed and goes back down to the first floor, sitting on the sofa. Kerry stops playing the guitar with an uncomfortable screech and whines loudly.
“Tell him try changing it to a minor tune.” Johnny says. V frowns at him, not sure if he’s actually offering genuine musical help or if he’s just fucking around to try and rile Kerry up. Either way, V knows Kerry wouldn’t appreciate any unwarranted advice at this stage. Johnny clicks his tongue, because he knows it too, he just doesn’t like not letting everyone know what he thinks.
V goes to lean back, only to sit up straight again, looking back and noticing there’s a bong stuck behind him. He pulled it out, then sighs at the mess. Before standing up and picking up empty and half-filled glasses to the kitchen to stick them in the dish washer. He continued to throw out two thongs wedged in the sofa. Wipe the counter from the sticky, spilled alcoholic drinks and their mixers.
It took a while until the sofa and the coffee table in front of it looked nice enough, and V sits and slumps himself onto it in satisfaction, letting the sofa’s crevice swallow him as much as it could.
–
"Hey, what're you doing here?" Kerry asks, gently shaking him to wake him up.
V blinks blearily awake, takes a second to realize where he's at. Then at the question. Wanted to wait up for you sounds too cheesy suddenly and V decides to just shrug.
"You cleaned my place up." Kerry says appreciatively.
"Nnno, just the sofa area." V points out, then yawns, putting his hand into a fist and using his knuckles to cover it. Kerry lets out an 'Awww' kind of sound and V stopped yawning immediately, frowning up at him. Kerry stopped cooing, and grinned, "Come on, let's get you to an actual bed, huh?"
He pulls V up and leads him to the second floor onto the bed. V falls into it immediately, rolling so he can plant his face down onto the biggest pillow Kerry had, while Kerry went off to turn off most of the lights on the switch on the wall.
V doesn't need to see to know when Kerry shuffled into bed when the bed dips next to him. He puts a hand out to feel for Kerry and when his fingers found contact on skin, he scoots closer.
"D'aww," Kerry says again cut off harshly when V pokes his ribs, hard. "Hey you don't want me to think you're cute? Stop being cute."
"Thought you said I was a brat?" V coyly asked.
Kerry lets out a huff, "Alright, down, boy. Way past your bedtime for that."
"Sounds like I need some punishi--" V couldn't help a yawn before he could finish that sentence, "Yeah, point taken." He shuffles again, a leg lands on top of Kerry's before settling. “Sorry I bothered you while you were doing your song.” He says to Kerry’s arm.
Kerry lets out a soft laugh again, rubs the point of contact between his fingers and V's upper arm, “Yeah if you were anyone else, I would’ve told you to fuck off. Consider it a privilege that you got me away from my set and I’m still letting you on my bed.”
“Yay, privilege!” V whoops softly. “Always wanted to know what that feels like.”
Kerry snorted again. They went quiet and V thought that was the end of it. Until Kerry adds, “You know you don’t have to…” he stops like he thought better than to say it. V opens his eyes to look up at Kerry, telling him to go on.
Put on the spot, Kerry begrudgingly continues, “I dunno, just… you know I’m here for you, right? So.. I dunno, V, maybe next time, you could just think of coming over in the first place instead of it being an alternative plan? And, ugh, I know how this might sound to– Look, I’m not saying this ‘cus I’m jealous or, or clingy, okay, I know you got your own thing. Look, you don’t have to act all awkward and proper ‘round me, ‘s all. I mean, come on, V, it’s just me.”
“Uh-huh.” V says, though he doesn’t really get what that’s all about. He shuffles and drops his head back to its original position, closing his eyes. He’s falling asleep again, and he fights to hear what Kerry’s saying next, it gets jumbled into one hazy tune. Something about time, and them being friends, sometimes a little more, something about worrying about not hearing something…
He snuggled to Kerry’s arm again, concludes Kerry’s probably just stressed about the piece. So, he sleepily asks, “Didja finish it though? The song.”
“Huh?” Took a few seconds for Kerry to realize what he’s asking, “Oh… Nope. Gave up on it for tonight.”
“Should try changing it to minor key.” V hears himself say without him actually thinking it, then he groans quietly. He kicks the engram mentally, mumbles out, “Oh, shut up, Johnny…”
“Yeah, shut up, Johnny.” Kerry echoes immediately. But there’s a slight moment where V thinks Kerry’s arm had tensed a tiny bit, before relaxing, as he leaned into V’s hair. Then, "You smell nice."
Thanks, it's coconut and basil. V thinks he says, but he's not sure because he conked out within milliseconds. He thinks that for tomorrow, in-between getting home, and doing gigs, and finding leads about the relic, he’ll try to figure out what a basil actually is.
Author's Note: yeah so coconut and basil huh. The coconut that goes around getting bobbed by the sea but floats with the flow. The basil that could mean anything from a token to ward off the devil to a symbol of love. Also smells great together as a body wash. Fun! Maybe Kerry'll think there's poetry in it if V shared it the next day.
#cyberpunk 2077#kerry eurodyne#johnny silverhand#lil guy v#writingcactus#gonna have to go and find my other ficlets to tag with that augh#i drew this tag
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You beat the game while (V)
You get spanked every time you die.
Warnings: Slaps, Mean Boyfriends tbh, masochist reader, Sadist boyfriends.
A/N: I wrote this quickly. So, sorry in advance.
Ya’ll already know how this goes, I ain’t even gonna explain how you got here but here you are. Shaky hands on the keyboard as you feel 3 pairs of eyes staring at your character’s every move. You start softly doing the usual, collecting wood, starting with a few wood items. You attempt to go on a cave even if you are internally scared you don’t want your boyfriends to know that. Specially after they were laughing about how you wouldn’t be able to last 5 minutes in the game. So, you swallow how scared you are to lose and you go into a cave, everything going absolutely fine. You upgrade to an amazing iron pick and even find a few diamonds as the first 30 minutes on the game going absolutely wonderful. That’s when things go wrong because here you are with the last of your torches that you made with the last of your wood, while you are not super deep into the cave; you KNOW it’s already night time because Minecraft hates you. SO there you are making your way out, and out of the corner of your eye you see this cute little skeleton just aiming towards you; with barely a second you are able to avoid his arrow, but not without taking a considerable amount of damage from the fall to avoid the arrow. Here you are RUNNING for you life when this little fucking baby zombie comes to kill you! A lot of “You lost!” And “AHHHH” pound agaisnt the walls of the room as you look defeated at the red screen. The boys waste no time telling you to stand up and lay face down on the bed. You do as your told rising your (Sapnap’s) shirt enough to reveal your pretty red lace panties to your boyfriends eyes. You hear one of the groan as the other starts massaging your ass. Just preparing you quickly for how much they are about to fuck up your ass.
“You ready baby?” You think George asks beside you; just as you are about to give a snarky response you feel a hand land on your cheek. The sound resonates in the room as a sharp pain shoots its way in your ass the same shape of the hand that delivered the punishment. A yelp leaving your lips as you feel the affected zone heat up. You almost move your hand back to try and appease the pain, but a rough hand takes the place as it starts massaging the hurt skin a little too roughly for it to be helpful. You feel movement around yoou as Sapnap stands now directly in front of you ass. He wastes no time delivering his slap into your ass. Of course he is not nice enough to go to the other cheek instead he hits you exactly where Dream did so that you can relive the painful experience. Your eyes well up with tears as the pain become increasingly hurtful. They redo the same rough massage before George starts behind you. He bends down to run his tongue over the red handprint of on your ass, his cool saliva giving a nice feeling that has you moaning at the feel, but it only lasts a few second before he delivers his slap on your other cheek, even with the soft gesture at the beginning he delivers a painful smack to your ass. Tears are now flowing down your face as you attempt to get out of the bed to continue the game. You make a poor try to play while not sitting down on the gaming chair as you continue the game, and of course it is night time. With no weapons and the burning on your ass you are already at 4 hearts. Dream being the darling he is moves his hands to your shoulders starting to give you a massage that would normally be suspicious, but your ass burns too much to realize his true intentions. He gives a kiss to the top of your head and then you feel him push your shoulders down until you are forced to sit down completely on the chair. A loud scream rips through your lips as you feel the tender skin of your ass almost stick to the leather of the chair. Your focus leaving completely as your character dies. You start crying silently knowing that they will not hold back. You are moved to the bed and pushed around until you are only on your pretty red panties.
“Look at you matching your panties with these pretty hand prints” Dream moans into your shoulder as his hand moves to rub your clit. Your mind almost numb as you feel George sucking on your tits, and Sapnap moving down to start eating you out. Your legs closing around Dreams hand until Sapnap pushed your thighs open. Almost as if it was rehearsed Dream lands a perfect slap to your clit making your stomach turn at the painful pleasure that runs through your veins.
“Come on baby you still got two more. I bet you can cum just by slapping your pretty little clit” George’s thick accent makes it’s presences letting you know you are going to ENJOY this night.
#dream team x reader#sapnap smut#dream team#sapnap x reader#dreamwastaken smut#georgenotfound smut#dream smut#dream team smut#dream x reader#georgenotfound x reader#dreamwastaken x reader#george smut#sapnap x reader smut#dream x you#dream smp smut#dreamwastaken#georgenotfound#sapnap x y/n#sapnap
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Here is a masterlist of my works (links in the titles). I always love to know your thoughts if you want to share them 💜 Happy reading!
(transformative works policy: I'm cool with fanart, podfics, translations, moodboards & whatever kind of art you make as long as you either tumblr or Ao3 link it to me. You don't have to ask but if you want to talk to me first - my door (inbox) is always open!
Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson (Stranger Things):
HomeSteddie Farms: Rated T - Steve and Eddie had a farm and on this farm were a bunch of critters with awesome names. Plus art by Doomcheese!
Do You Hear What I Hear?: Rated T - Steve brings home a mogwai, Eddie's never been good with rules
Nobody's Baby: Rated E - Steddie Dirty Dancing AU Steve & Robin best friends, Eddie & Chrissy best friends, 80s movie campiness, light BDSM, traffic light system for dancing and sex. With art by @lexplexdraws
Like a Mythical Virgin: Rated M - Eddie finds out the hard way that feral unicorns don't chase virgins for nice reasons
Let Me Be Your Man (i want to hold your hand): Rated E - Mike gets help from Steve with making a mixtape for Will. Eddie learns that there's an art to mixtapes. mike/steve bonding, laughter, fluff, little pining, smut (You can find the podfic of this one here. Read by the amazing RattleandHum (@thirdeye1234))
Destroy the Silence (Drummer Steve) - Rated E - Steve joins the band and Eddie discovers he has a thing for competent drummers, healthy bdsm communication, laughter, fluff & smut. Art by @carcrash429 (You can find the podfic of this one here. Read by the fabulous @rufusbear)
Off the Shelf - Rated E - Stripper Steve give Eddie a private show. Eddie discovers a new kink. Modern AU, basically porn with a smidge of plot.
Screw Todd, Steve's Her (His) Daddy Now - Rated E - Steve keeps calling himself Daddy "unintentionally" and Eddie's about to lose it, light bdsm, non verbal communication, daddy kink (or is it?)
The Second Worst Trip to Mordor Ever Taken - Rated T - Steve takes the boys & Eddie to Indy to a nerd store and flirts his way into trouble, Steddie, hurt/comfort, misunderstandings
Even Flowers Have Their Dangers (Series: No One Is Alone)- Rated E - What if the tunnels turned Steve & the kids into shapeshifting wolves? S4 rewrite and my own write up of S5 but with half the party as shapeshifters, smut, graphic imagery, battle scenes
There’s Something Wrong With Steve (WIP ch2/4) - Rated M - I’m not gonna tell you, Steddie, Suspense thriller, creep factor 6/10 and climbing
Let the Music Play -Series - Rated T - The music that plays every time Steve gets Vecna’d, Stobin besties, Steddie pre relationship, hurt/comfort
An Accidental Flogging - Rated E - Steve has questions about Eddie’s kinks, Eddie would like to have answers but he’s actually a virgin, friends to lovers, Top Steve, accidental kink discovery, laughter, fluff, & smut
Drabbles that aren't full fics: Happy Summer, Steve's Thighs, i was afraid to follow, Personal Space, can you read the letter for me (Part two), Pillow Talk, Steddie First Kiss Challenge, Constellations, Artax is a New Horse, To Do List
Art made by amazing artists that goes with something I wrote (eek!): Crabs, Drummer Steve, Dirty Dancing, Homesteddie
Clint Barton Centric (Marvel):
True Colors Series (8 Parts/complete) - Rated E - Clint/Bucky: The Snap didn’t dust half the universe, it turned them into soulmates who can only see colors when they find each other, Clint & Bucky don’t mean to find each other. Almost strangers to soulmates, smut, background Steve/Natasha and others
The Case of the Missing Purple Sweatshirts - Rated T - Clint/Bucky: Someone is stealing Clint’s sweatshirts…my excuse to let Clint talk about Scooby Doo
Through the Looking Glass - Rated E - Clint/Bucky: Instead of talking, they miscommunicate themselves into being sex dungeon fuck buddies, BDSM Dungeon fic, miscommunications, learning through bad negotiations, so very much smut, background Steve/Darcy, past Clint/She Who Must Not Be Named
Something to Tweet About - Rated T - Clint/Bucky: Someone tweets a series of photos of Clint & Bucky hanging out and mutually pining, they deal with it by avoiding it obviously. friends to lovers, social media ship to lovers
A Life Well Lived - Rated T - Clint/Bucky: just a glance at Clint’s last day
Make it Permanent - Rated E - Clint/Bucky: Secret dating, hickeys and tattoos and a little bit of healthy possessiveness
And the Stockings Were Hung - Rated E - Clint/Bucky: Christmas Exchange fic, Bucky's first Christmas at the tower, fluff and smut
Porn & Prose - Rated E - Clint/Bucky: some backstage smut between Mr Bingley (Clint) and Mr Darcy (Bucky)
Bucky, Lemme Smash - Rated E - Clint/Bucky: I just wanted to turn Clint purple and use this line from that meme, smut
Both, Both is Good - Rated E - Clint/Bucky: Bucky avoids Clint until he realizes Clint has been avoiding him, fuck buddies to lovers, smut & miscommunication
The Happiest Place on Earth - Rated E - Clint/Bucky: Bucky plays Hawkeye in Disneyland because the actor who plays him is short and he’s real pissed that some guy named Clint is tall enough to play the Winter Soldier, enemies to lovers, Clint in eyeliner, smut
Three to Tango - Rated E - Clint/Bucky/Natasha: James & Natasha teach Clint’s dance class, then they invite him for private lessons. Healthy communication, smut and Clint’s self degradation
A Bird By Any Other Name (Series) - Rated E - Clint/Steve: Clint as the Winter Soldier thru WW2 & the present, hurt/comfort, mental struggles, smut
Body Count - Rated E - Clint/Steve: tumblr prompt hitman meets a sex worker, just so much smut
Friends Don’t Let Friends Wait Too Long - Rated T - Clint/Steve: Steve is too nervous to ask Clint out, Bucky’s gonna help in an helpful way. Misunderstanding, fluff, laughter, Natasha being a troll
Marvel/DC Crossovers:
Draw & Release (2 part series) - Rated E - Clint Barton/Jason Todd: Clint gets a tattoo & finds a new boyfriend/Dom
Sterek (Teen Wolf):
Somewhere Under the Rainbow - Rated T - Wild geese can't be bothered to catch sidekicks. Fluff, magic, leprechauns, banter
#steddie#steve harrington#stranger things#eddie munson#wolves#winterhawk#bucky barnes#clint barton#hawkeye#natasha romanoff#steve rogers#amerihawk#marvel#the avengers#drummer steve#ao3#masterlist#dirty dancing#feral unicorns#teen wolf#sterek#stiles stilinski#derek hale#jason todd
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ITS ME AGAIN.
2/2
I would like to express my genuine and serious opinion about MH and the relationship between Y/N and JK. Let's start with the fact that this book needs to be reread few times, to understand better the dynamics between the main protagonists. I'm convinced that reading it one time it's NOT enough to understand what's actually happening. MANY and MANY people comment on it about JK seeing Y/N as a fuck buddy at this point, and nothing more. That he will never see her as a potential girlfriend.
The first time I have read it, I got really annoyed and frustrated about this slow burn, like many others who write you these annoying asks. I thought that after so many chapters, basically nothing really happened, that he wants her for sex only. HOWEVER, when I started ready it for the second and third time then + read MH JUNGKOOK'S POV, my jaw dropped, because I began seeing and understanding things I never noticed before. My perspective of the situation COMPLETELY CHANGED . Now, I don't know if you study psychology/are interested in it, or if all of this is just a coincidence made up me and my analysing everything habit, but rereading it carefully, we can notice how well, subtle but clear you're trying to portrait the feelings of both of them towards each other. Let me explain it better.
(THIS MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS)
Correct me if I'm wrong, but now that my perspective changed, I see MH JK as a guy who basically craves for reciprocated love, cuddles, attention and mostly important, who can't stay single or alone for too long. Not because he's desperate, but because he's a hopeless romantic who likes to give and receive love. The thing is, if in the very beginning I found very annoying his obsession with Kiko, now I think I understand what actually happened. He is attached to her for the good, old memories she brought him. He wants to bring the nice feelings he had back. In which he truly felt loved and understood by someone. But this doesn't mean he needs specifically Kiko.
He loves her, is attached to her, but it's not the same as before. Sometimes we want our ex back because we want the good memories with them back and not specifically them now. More specifically, we want their old selves with us because we romanticise the memories a lot, but in reality we don't want to be with the person they are now. Does it make sense?
Why am I so convinced about this? Because of the fuck buddies deal thing. If he truly still loves Kiko and wants nobody else, in his mind NEVER EVER would have blown up the idea of having sex, and more over, REALLY ENJOYING it with his best friend. If someone is THE ONE for you and you're 100% serious about them, you don't act like a freaking husband with your bff. You made very clear his feelings by his actions. His actions and words speak for himself. He's attracted to Y/N right now, mentally and physically. He doesn't have romanticised old memories with her, so this means he's living the moment NOW and the feelings towards her are new. I can't say he's in love yet, because again, if you're in love you don't go to your ex. However, I'm truly convinced that in the last chapters we can absolutely tell he likes her now. Seriously likes her, but still denies it to himself, because he deeply knows that Y/N is his dearest best friend. It would be messy to date her, because this implies ruining the friendship in case something goes wrong and also she is in his main group of friends. Can you imagine breaking up with her and seeing her in your homies circle? And not having her as your beloved best friend anymore ? Hell no. And mostly important, she NEVER explicitly said to him anything about even the slightest possibility to want him a boyfriend. The dude basically automatically suppresses the thoughts about dating her, because unconsciously he knows it's not worthy and that he still receives the love he craves for from Kiko. She's basically the "comfort zone". Why risking to lose it to try dating someone who doesn't guarantee you anything (for now at least) . But objectively speaking, his words and body already behave like they are almost in love. I'm 100% sure that if Y/N confesses now, he would accept right away to date her. He's too whipped for her. Can't say the same about Y/N, who is the less considerate about her own feelings. No, SHE IS, because she overthinks it A LOT, more than him, but she's worse than him in suppressing the feelings for the same reasons. She tries to gaslight herself even when she perfectly knows it , and she literally goes to tue swimming pool.
that's it for now. I have more things, but let's stop here.
-July
HI you again!
This will be nothing new for some readers, especially to those who have been here from the beginning and has read my responses for quite sometime now (you guys can skip this response because you probably know it all by now hehe) ; you're right. I think too that for some people, it might take more reads to understand the little things that are not so obvious. Again, I'm gonna repeat myself but MH is a story where you should read between the lines. Not everything is clear and obvious. There are little easter eggs throughout the story. It causes people trying to get answers directly from me, since they haven't gotten it in the story. But I do not want to spoil anything, I prefer readers knowing the real stuff from the story. Until the story is not finished, I'll keep my mouth shut and enjoy the chaos 😁
I actually did study psychology, had it as a subject in my school and it was my favorite one. I think my writing mirrors me. I do tend to get very deep and analyze certain situations and people. I think that's what's happening in this story as well (and in my other ones too). That's a very good guess you made here!
It is a very interesting take that you have of him and the situations in the story! I cannot confirm nor deny. All I can say is that Jk really did love Kiko. I've seen in my life people that started hooking up with someone else after their break-up. That's how some people cope with it. Or even if they're fine after break-up, mostly men, think of sex a lot. It's a part most of them do not let go. So in this case, I wouldn't exactly say he didn't love her because he came up with the idea of them hooking up. We all know it was way deeper and complicated than this. It's also fine to enjoy the sex with someone that isn't your partner + when you're still heartbroken and love with someone else. He was surprised himself that he truly enjoyed it. But then again, he didn't exactly tell her to have sex. It's something that happened naturally and overtime. It showed off the beginning of their chemistry.
You've made some good points! I truly liked this analyzation (it's one of the best things about writing, to receive long messages/ask with analyzation!!) and I enjoyed reading it very much! I do have to stay neutral though and I hope you understand that 😁 Thank you again for this message/feedback. It was truly fun to read (I did read it the first time when I was on a walk with my dog and I tried not to trip 🫠). I had some cool responses prepared but I forgot them lolol but I think I covered everything I wanted!
Thank you, sending you lots of love and a huge hug, July! 🩵🫶
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I'M FUCKING SCREAMING BECAUSE I HAVE A THEORY ABOUT THE KISS AND I AM LOSING MY ABSOLUTE MIND OVER IT
It relates back to my other theory, which to summarize in case you don't feel like reading all that, goes like this:
Something went wrong with the miracle, it doesn't just affect whether people notice and remember Gabriel but can affect any of their memories about anything and we're already starting to see signs that it's been happening.
[EDIT: I'm no longer attached to the idea that the miracle is what's fucking with people's memories, but I'm positive that something (probably Metatron) is. Still leaving the original text the same]
It goes a bit deeper than that, but that's the basics of what you need to know for THIS theory and I'm sure you can already see where I'm going with this, or at least where I'm going with the first half of it. This is a two part theory.
The first part, as you've probably guessed, is that Aziraphale reacts to the kiss the way he does because he's already lost too much of their history together. And we have no way of knowing how much. I don't actually think it's a whole lot at this point. But maybe enough. Just barely enough to shift the way that Aziraphale views the nature of their relationship.
Now if we're being completely honest here, there's no way Aziraphale was going to have a positive reaction to that kiss. Too much has just happened. 6000 years worth of bridges just went down in flames, something vital just broke and they both know it.
This theory isn't really based on the fact that he reacted badly to the kiss, because of course he did, how could he not? This is more about a few very specific moments during his reaction. I could probably fill a library analyzing everything that was going on there, but
When Crowley first starts his confession Aziraphale seems puzzled, like he's not quite sure where all this is coming from or what Crowley is trying to get at. It's as though the thought of them together has never even crossed his mind before, and I think we're pretty much all in agreement that yes it goddamn well has.
And it only gets worse from there. His expression when Crowley first pulls him into the kiss? It's like a punch in the gut every single time. Even though a multitude of emotions flash across his face in the next few seconds, it doesn't matter. You can already see how it's going to play out. Even though every fiber of your being screams that this can't be right, that one look already told you everything you need to know.
And then Aziraphale puts his hand on Crowley's shoulder, and for one wild and desperate moment you feel an aching surge of hope, because at least he's finally returning Crowley's embrace. Things are still dire, so many things are so wrong, and there's still no clear path to fix any of it. But he's returning Crowley's embrace, and no matter what happens next, there's hope.
But then the moment passes and you realize....you were wrong. You misunderstood. There was no embrace. There was only a split second careless placement of Aziraphale's hand. They break apart, and for several seconds there is an absolute war of emotions on his face, but then his expression hardens, and he says "I forgive you", and it is the single worst thing you have ever heard uttered in your life
But let's talk about something else for a minute, and it's going to seem slightly off topic at first, but bear with me. You know how there are brief moments when Jim recalls a memory as Gabriel for a few seconds?
The first time is when they're trying to figure out the first thing he remembers and rather than recalling any of his memories as Jim, he recalls a memory as Gabriel. The second time it happens is the time he gets ominous. "There will come a tempest." And then one last time, when he finally has a snippet of a memory about where his actual memory might be. And you know what all of those have in common?
Crowley.
Every single time Gabriel's memory starts to break through, it's Crowley who triggers it.
Crowley is the one who asks him, "What's the very first thing you remember?"
It's when Crowley says the word 'tempest' that Gabriel resurfaces and starts talking about a tempest and dire things to come.
Crowley asks him, "Well where is your memory then?" And Jim suddenly remembers about the matchbox.
Coincidence? Maybe. But it got me thinking. What if there's something about Crowley, some kind of innate ability to pull these memories to the surface, without even knowing he's doing it? And then, when I was watching the kiss for about the millionth time, another thought occured to me.
What if I was right??? What if, in that one brief instant of absolute fucking lunatic hope, I was right? Aziraphale WAS embracing him, he WAS returning the kiss. Because Crowley had pulled enough of what had been lost to the surface, enough that he remembered, if only for one brief second, he remembered what they were to each other.
I HAVE NOT KNOWN PEACE FOR A SINGLE SECOND SINCE THE MOMENT THIS THOUGHT OCCURED TO ME
#good omens s2 spoilers#good omens#gos2 spoilers#good omens 2#good omens meta#good omens theory#crowley#aziraphale#ineffable husbands#good omens kiss#good omens angst
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B5 S03E22 Z'Ha'Dum
previous episode - table of contents
Flashback central - Anna talking about signing onto the Icarus. Kosh saying "Z'Ha'Dum," Delenn and Sheridan talking about the Icarus landing on Z'Ha'Dum, Morden being a dickbag.
Anna doesn't seem very sincere, and I don't buy her "I'm an open book, but DELENN didn't tell you...no, I shan't say..." schtick.
I know I made all those predictions about how this will play out, but I really don't know how this is going to play out. Will the future be subverted and the prophecies less than self-fulfilling? I don't know!
Partner: "Do you think these guys did like, late-night interviews in the 90s or was it not popular enough?"
Me: "Hm let me consult my extensive memories of being 0-6 years old in an anti-technology cult in the 1990s."
Anna: "I'm your wife."
Dr Franklin: "That's your wife."
Sheridan: "If that's my wife, then what was all my years of grief-processing for?"
Excuse me Sheridan, take your hands off Delenn. Don't shake her just because you're emotionally overwrought.
I am on Delenn's side in this argument. Delenn said clearly that anyone who wouldn't have served the Shadows would have been killed. Therefore, Anna was either dead, or completely opposed to the life and wellbeing of every living thing in the galaxy.
yeah yeah Sheridan, you have big emotions. But don't be a dick.
Londo's political maneuvering has resulted in a promotion and he's bummed because he can't be satisfied with anything. He's a voracious pit of longing that can never be filled. When he's made an ambassador, he rages because they're sending him away. When he's given a prestigious advisor position, he's mad because he deserved it twenty years ago.
Mr Morden Jr is here. Sounds like there's about to be an attack on B5.
Looks like Dr Franklin just found something in his scans on Anna Sheridan.
Anna is refusing to answer any questions about anything unless John goes with her to Z'Ha'Dum to hear the answers there. Not even why she stayed and let herself be declared dead and all her loved ones grieve her death.
Aaaan he agrees to go to Z'Ha'Dum if she explains why she stayed. Against future!Delenn's pleas.
Anna says - IPX found a Shadows ship buried under the surface of Mars. As soon as they unearthed it, it sent a message. IPX took some parts and put a homing device inside. When another ship turned up and took the first one, they tracked it. (didn't the second ship also kill a fuckload of people? She doesn't mention anything about that.)
The Icarus went to the coordinates and found the Shadows. In a pit. Very foreboding. She says it was an accident that the crew was killed, and also destroyed the comm system. She says they portrayed themselves as vunerable coming out of hibernation and cut a deal that they could stay and study their tech if they didn't try to contact their homeworld(s).
It would be a cool plot twist if Anna was telling the truth and he really was about to find out he's been on the wrong side this entire time. However, I don't think that's the case. The Shadows haven't been taking out governmental heads, they've been displacing populations, causing genocides, anmd spreading suffering.
I do wonder what this secret task he's given Garibaldi is.
It's incredibly foolish to run off to the ACTUAL HOMEWORLD of your mortal enemies. But there goes John Sheridan! trot trot. Well, they did hit him where he's most vulnerable. The wound of losing a loved one never really goes away.
They're taking the White Star - what a fucking security vulnerability! Also, so funny that Sheridan is taking the White Star when he's only SEEN the Minbari pilot it. Aviation law must have gotten lax in the future.
Z'Ha'Dum doesn't have a breathable atmosphere. He goes off, alone, with his formerly-dead wife. To the enemy's planet. With no breathable atmosphere. And just nods and hands over his gun. And doesn't even keep his oxygen mask at hand!
Dummy.
And Morden's here. AND Anna gives HIM John's gun! goddddddddddd
Poor Delenn, she looks wrecked. John's message to her talks about his time jump and Delenn's plea to not go to Z'Ha'Dum. He says he went because maybe in that future, he listened to her and DIDN'T go, so he's going in case it changes the future.
Well.
ok
Justin on Z'Ha'Dum says that most of the higher races left this part of the universe, and the Vorlons stuck around to be parents. Clean your room, behave, etc. The Shadows, though, want to release their potentials...through conflict. "Those who survive are strong, better," Justin says. And Morden says if you knock over an anthill, the future generations get better at building anthills.
hm.
"...but I love my mom and dad," - noted parents-guy John Sheridan, hopefully.
"A few get lost along the way," Justin says. Yeah. Like the Narn got directly targeted and attacked repeatedly until they lost their telepaths, then almost lost everything? Literally they were T A R G E T E D. It isn't a neutral "they got lost," they were pummeled into near-oblivion.
Oop, the Shadows have arrived at B5.
Morden would have us believe that sonnets came from wars. Bullshit - sonnets came from the Italian courtly style and was developed in order to flirt better. (per Partner's masters of poetry)
Ahhh, the Shadows are hanging out over B5 as the hammer over Sheridan's head. Sheridan's too good at diplomacy, so he's preventing the species' growth through warfare. boooooo.
I could go through and rebut the things they're saying point by point but ehhh. It's a lot. But it's 99% bullshit and 1% mispresented.
Sheridan drops a bomb: Anna has been altered in the same way as the people who were being sent to become components in the Shadows ships.
Whoop, Shadow incoming. And gun incoming! John Sheridan had TWO GUNS. badadadada
oof, poor Sheridan. He's arming the White Star to detonate, and Anna's turned up saying that Anna is dead, but she can love John as well as Anna ever did.
"I want you to know that I love you, Delenn. Bye." he says, in the video message.
And there's the Kosh fragment! Sheridan jumps into the pit of doom in the center of Z'Ha Dum as the White Star bursts through the central dome.
Anna didn't like that!
Kosh said he couldn't help Sheridan if he helped then. And then he helped anyway. lol
I like the G'Kar voice-over. Andreas has such a marvelous voice and he really knows how to use it.
One of the fighters is missing - piloted by Garibaldi! And the marvelous CGI depicts it floating in a Shadows ship. Well. At least we won't run out of plot anytime soon. :P
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I still think about qsmp purgatory
To me, that arc was absolutely perfect.
The stakes were so high, we genuinely thought some or all of the eggs might die depending on who the winners ended up being, and no one knew exactly how that would play out, so you had to just try damn hard to win for your kid. But there was even that chance that if your team did win that would be the wrong outcome and your kids would die.
But anyway the atmosphere was insane
That eye and the ominous fucking voice, that opening animatic of the mystery guy walking into a surveillance setup, monitoring everyone on the island, that’s so cool. So much mystery, so much implied power.
And then we get there and girlies have NOTHING. And it was fucking bugged or something for the first part so no one could fucking mine cobblestone. Then the random disadvantages pile on top of that, now you’ve got to worry about thirst, all the food is going bad and won’t stack.
And I watched Bolas pov so that’s what I am talking about:
This group was at every conceivable disadvantage. Right off the bat they only have like half the active members of the other groups, no one there is good at pvp, and most of those guys don’t really grind and play that much. They keep dying, Phil starts to make some progress and admins spawn mobs all around him to prevent even that. They give up, and resort to killing each other.
And somehow, from rock bottom, from passing through all the stages of grief and landing on insanity, this small group goes from being but a speck in the progress bar percentages to fucking winning the whole thing.
Watching their madness turn into actual power is sooooo wonderful to watch. They stay fully crazy. But somehow, that works. Going absolutely feral, saying fuck the rules and do whatever, yell mumbled nonsense at your enemies, steal all their shit, that’s the winning play.
There is something so gratifying in watching them go from day one of not having a base, dying over and over again, to week 2 where they are kinda doing the damn thing. And still don’t have a real base and die over and over. I mean that’s literally Jaiden’s main strategy.
And then Baghera with the fucking chainsaw. And Cellbit leaning into his character’s preestablished bloodlust thingy, and everyone collectively building off of each other’s energy.
And something about watching my favorite blorbos lose their goddamn minds for 5 hours every day. I loved every second of it. And it wouldn’t be able to be much longer, Slimecicle for one was absolutely exhausted, that guy doesn’t stream for more than a few hours and now he was grinding for 5 a day. Only adds to the chaos.
But the pace, it being every day and yet a scramble because of the time limit of play time.
The stakes of the eggs lives potentially being on the line
The complete foreign nature of an entirely new island?? With a new scary npc??? Unprecedented.
I absolutely love this arc.
It’s been a while and I still think about it.
I’m mostly making this post because we’ll mainly it’s 2am and that’s the sort of thing you do at 2am but also because I remember like during and right after the prison event people saying that was their favorite qsmp arc
And like good for you bestie but I do not get it
My heart belongs to purgatory
And I want to submit “ok but do you remember-“ to the council because it was fucking perfect.
And omg the fucking bolas shrine and Baghera and cellbit cameo in purgatory 2 like, ah my heart.
Bolas forever o7
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Hi! This is a fic rec of 52 of my favorite canon fics, organized by length from longest to shortest. Enjoy!
Hiding Place by orphan_account (365k)
Louis never wanted a soulmate, didn’t really care for the whole Bonding thing at all, really. Enter Harry Styles, who’s wanted to be Bonded for as long as he could remember. With one fateful meeting in an X Factor bathroom, Louis gets a dagger on his arm and the realization that just because Harry is his soulmate doesn’t mean it’s mutual.
From the X Factor house to Madison Square Garden, from the Fountain Studios stage to stadiums across the world, Louis has to learn to love without losing himself completely, because someday his best friend will Bond to someone and replace Louis as the center of his universe. Meanwhile, Harry begins to think that maybe fate doesn’t actually know what it’s doing after all, because his other half has clearly been right in front of him the whole time. All he has to do now is convince Louis to give them a chance.
Or, the canon compliant Harry and Louis love story from the very beginning, where the only difference is that the love between them is literally written on their skin, and there’s only so much they can hide.
One More Time Again by orphan_account (232k)
Harry looks down to where Louis is cradling his hand between his own. Louis' hands are slender, the bones delicate, the nails bitten short. The 2-8 on the backs of his fingers is gone, but the faded scar from a skateboarding mishap in Year 7 is still there.
Harry's hand is awkward, knobby-boned and naked, no rings, no tattoos. It's too big for his wrist and his wrist too big for his arm. Yet it still somehow fits in Louis' in the painfully perfect way it always did.
He blinks back the sting in his eyes.
On the morning of his second sold-out performance at Madison Square Garden, Harry wakes up to find that he's sixteen years old, on The X Factor, and that he has a chance to make things right.
A canon-compliant fix-it fic (sort of).
Given A Chance by fabby / @fabby1d (173k)
Five years after One Direction took their last tour, the last thing Louis Tomlinson ever expected to happen while on a tea run at the local Piggly Wiggly was to run into his ex-boyfriend and ex-bandmate Harry Styles.
The odds of them ever running into each other again had to be super slim, right?
Wrong.
What happens when you mix ex-boyfriends with a large serving of Small Town America? Will Louis and Harry be able to set aside their differences, or will Louis be able to stay breezy as fuck in the wake of Harry’s arrival?
(or, the one where Louis and Harry run into each other five years after One Direction ends and learn how to love each other again. Featuring: Reggie as the overweight labrador, Niall as Louis’ last grip on reality, and Nowheresville, North Carolina as the setting for Louis’ worst nightmare to come true.)
And Then a Bit by infinitelymint / @infinitelymint (158k)
“We’d like to give the fans what they want.” Magee states, placing his hand on the table in front of him and leaning forward. “We want to give them Larry Stylinson.”
Or, take a parallel universe where Louis and Harry were never together, mix in a two year hiatus and an impending comeback, pour in a dash of lost fans, two tablespoons of strong friendship and a Modest! employee with a good idea. Add a squeeze of pretending to be a couple, lots of kisses and a tattoo or two. Stir. Serve: the mother of all publicity stunts.
(aka Harry and Louis fake a relationship for publicity. Eventually it becomes a lot less fake and a lot more real.)
It Goes, It’s Golden by lucythegoosey / @harryrainbows (150k)
The chaos Zayn left in his wake wouldn’t feel so disastrous if Harry had Louis. But everything between them crashed and burned a long time ago. All Harry is left with is a hopeless longing and a fear that the band’s current disarray will set in for good.
… And then he finds himself stuck on a sixteen hour plane trip with Louis Tomlinson.
This could either be the most awkward flight of Harry’s life, or the beginning of an atonement he’s been dreaming of since 2013.
Canon Compliant AU in which Harry and Louis broke under the strain of it all and now, years on, there’s a chance to put all the pieces back together. Set in early April 2015 all the way through to October. Written in Harry and Louis’ perspectives, alternating every chapter.
After All These Years by LifeInAColorWheel (127k)
It’s been seven years since One Direction went on hiatus and it’s been eight years since Louis and Harry broke up. They’ve been strangers to one another since then.
But, over the course of a weeklong boys’ trip, history between Harry and Louis resurfaces.
Or,
The one when Louis and Harry don’t talk, connect again years later, and reflect on why their love collapsed.
Just Ask Me To by TellMeThisIsNotLove / @tellmethisisnottumblisnextfuckup (120k)
“You’re telling the truth,” Louis whispers.
“Of course I’m telling the truth!” Harry doesn’t even care that he sounds exasperated.
“Oh my god.” Louis grabs the wall behind him as if looking for support. His body slides down against it until he’s sitting crouched on the floor.
He mumbles something but Harry can’t really figure out what it is. He crouches down, and looks desperately at the breaking boy in front of him.
“You’re telling the truth,” Louis whispers. “You were not supposed to–”
“I was not supposed to do what? Tell me please,” Harry urges, taking Louis’ hands gently in his.
Or the X Factor era canon fic where they learn how to be a couple and that not everyone is going to be on their sides especially those with plain white t-shirts and saccharine smiles.
Burn to Ash by bethaboo / @bethaboolou (116k)
Harry is sitting there, so fucking casual, and Louis realizes in a split second he was not ready. When Harry walked out in Detroit and never looked back, he was a boy verging on a man, still only twenty years old, but there's a man in his place now. Hard and resolute, yes, but still, for the first time in a long time, Louis can kind of see the old Harry in him. The soft, directness of his gaze, the hesitant smile he gives to Lou, the way he wrings his ridiculously large hands in his lap.
He's a little bit the eager sixteen year old puppy dog again, his innocence and sweetness resurrected miraculously, and Louis freezes in place. He was prepared to face the asshole Harry. He was prepared to meet a whole new Harry.
Louis is not prepared to meet one of the old incarnations of Harry, and it absolutely tears him up.
Or the fic where Harry spirals out of control, the band breaks up, and then he shows back up, five years later.
The Blue In Your Eyes Is the Tenerife Sea by lookingforparadise (105k)
Where We Are Tour
Untangle Me by suicxne (103k)
Louis finds himself out of place in LA, unable to get at an itch that’s been bothering him for years. He supposes back in the early days, home hadn’t been a place. It’d been a person. He’d etched it permanently into his skin for fucks sake.
It was always him and Harry. Stuck to each other like super glue. Pulled together by some magnetic force, existing in their own bubble. Everyone could see it, but that was half the problem, wasn’t it?
It’s not like Louis can pinpoint the exact moment in time when him and Harry fell out of sync. There wasn’t really one at all. It had been a gradual slip, like the tide wearing away at a sandstone cliff. Chipping the solid foundations until there was nothing left to stop the structure falling to the waves below. It’s not like he spends all of his time sitting around moping over a lost friendship, he’s good at distractions. But LA only seems to accentuate the distance between them. Two separate planets, not even in the same solar system.
Or the one where Harry and Louis finally get it right.
You’ve Got My Devotion (Hate You Sometimes) by lucythegoosey / @harryrainbows (95k)
Harry was in the biggest boy band in the world. He was also one half of the best (or worst, depends on who you ask) kept secret relationship in the music industry.
Now, almost five years on, after One Direction has broken up, and Harry and Louis' relationship has as well, a video threatens to put everything at risk.
One determined Irishman, a massive publicity stunt and two begrudging exes are all it takes to bring One Direction back to life and maybe, just maybe, Harry and Louis' mangled love life too.
Or: Harry and Louis are forced to fake-date after an old video from when they were dating emerges.
Happy To Be Found by ashavahishta / @ashavahishta (69k)
The weeks spanning October 2012 - January 2013 are a rollercoaster for Harry and Louis. There's shows to play, an album to promote, publicity stunts to be acted out...and several new tattoos to be inked. Throughout it all, the boys focus on the most important thing in their lives - their relationship.
To The Ends of the Earth by stylinsoncity / @stylinsoncity (68k)
During a yearlong hiatus, Louis visits Harry at his cabin in Idaho, where long-buried feelings ignite like the fire keeping them warm.
The Dark and the Dentist by sunshiner (66k)
“I know this song,” Louis whispers, and Harry has to lean his ear toward him to pick up what he’s saying. “It was written for people to dance to it. We should be dancing.”
We can’t, Harry almost spits, but it’d be stupid of him. Louis knows they can’t. Even if he looks like any regular Parisian in their twenties, and Harry looks like any hipster Parisian in their twenties, they can’t anyway. To be fair, they probably wouldn’t do it even if they were out. But if they were two uni students, both in Paris for an exchange, meeting over fallen books at the library, or because of mutual friends, or watching Monet’s Water Lilies?
“How would we dance?” Harry murmurs, mouth almost pressed to Louis’ cheek, so close he can feel his warmth. What a picture they must make, two millionaires freezing in a park and dreaming of a different life.
An account of the events of November 2014. Canon-compliant.
Time Passed by coffinofachimera (66k)
Louis struggles with their relationship as Harry grows into his identity.
Bigger Than Life by rippedgloves (48k)
“Boybander Harry Styles spotted leaving West Hollywood joined hand in hand with new beau, Xander Ritz”
His heart drops in his chest as he scrolls down, ignoring the short irrelevant article and looking desperately for a picture. Sure enough, there’s pap shots of Harry and Xander, walking hand in hand, looking drunk and cheerful and together.
And that’s—that’s really not what Louis was expecting at all.
Drifting, Weightless by dinosaursmate / @dinosaursmate (41k)
“We’ve been asked to do a gig,” Niall said slowly. “Harry and Liam are completely up for it, I am too.”
“Alright. What’s the catch?” Louis asked with suspicion.
“It’s, um…” Niall cleared his throat. “So, Juliana was contacted by this themed cruise company, and they want us to do a four-day One Direction cruise.”
The words hung in the air as Louis’ right eyebrow slowly crept up and he fixed Niall with a stare.
“Absolutely not.” Louis rolled his eyes. “You’re essentially asking me to go on a working holiday with my ex. Stranded on a boat in the ocean for four days.”
“Cruise ships are huge! You don’t have to see him in your down time.”
---
Harry and Louis are exes with benefits until they're not, and the Mediterranean Sea might just be the perfect place to work through some unresolved issues.
Yeah, He’s A Looker (But I Really Think It’s Guts That Matter Most) by devilinmybrain / @thedevilinmybrain(40K)
Five times Oli was asked to do something that was outside of his job description, and the one time he didn't have to be asked.
Nonstop Earthquake Dreams of You by luminaries (37k)
And there's heat behind it, blazing, plasmatic, like stars crashing together, like an explosion in space, like a supernova, like a black hole--everything else sucked out of existence. There's no bed and there's no pillow and they're not lying down, just floating somewhere, somehow, and there's no room and there's no X Factor house and there's no Niall snuffling or Liam's deep, even breathing and there's no wind or traffic outside and there's no hum of the heating unit and it's all just Louis. All encompassingly Louis.
or, harry falls hard and finds louis already at the bottom
We’ll Be the Fine Line by garblegorf (32k)
“…hey, Harry. It’s Louis…… um, yeah. Listened to the album tonight. It’s real good mate. Um, yeah, just real, impressed. I was kinda putting it off, ya’know, didn’t know if I wanted to listen to it. Saw you went on James and, uh, Saturday Night Live. Couldn’t watch you, have a hard time watching you on these things……. Anyway, mate, just thought I would drop a line. Don’t need to call me back. Alright.”
Louis listens to Fine Line, and, drunk, he leaves a voicemail for Harry after months of not speaking. This reminds Harry of a time before everything fell apart, slowly, painfully, a time when the two of them were still in love. And he desperately wants to go back.
Loved By Your Mother by superglass / @gaymoustache (31k)
Harry stretches out like Venus with her lover, growing sleepy in the late afternoon light with a baby growing inside her. Perhaps not literally, not physically. Not exactly.
or
Harry struggles to come to terms with wanting to have children, and what that means for their relationship. Canon compliant, set a few years into the future.
We Can Take the Long Way Home by eleadore / @eleadore (27k)
“Fertile,” Louis says, and then laughs because it sounds stupid to say out loud. He hasn’t ever really thought of himself in those terms. Baby-making terms. It’s just one of those things his body can do, like exercise, or go without tea. Doesn’t mean he will.
or,
The band takes a break. Harry and Louis come together.
True Love's Gold by alivingfire / @alivingfire (27k)
Gemma starts responding to every single one of Harry’s texts—regardless of subject—with i don’t care, talk to louis. Liam lets Harry complain to him for hours on Skype, pretending he’s not doing other things while Harry whines about his problems. Niall thinks the whole thing is hilarious, texting Harry links to articles titled So, you want your man to propose? and 15 ways to get him ready for the aisle! and follows each of these up with page upon page of laughing emojis. Harry tries everything, literally everything he can think of short of grabbing Louis by tattooed forearm and yelling, “PROPOSE TO ME BEFORE I COMBUST.”
Or, it takes a village to arrange a proposal, but that doesn't mean it's going to go as planned.
Through the Chaos and the Calm by xogucciblue / @xogucciblue (25k)
Harry had thought he’d been prepared for his first solo tour, and in some ways it is exactly what Harry expected. But in other ways it’s entirely different. It’s lonelier than he remembered, all the waiting around backstage, the endless hours on tour buses, the days he’s so tired he thinks he could melt into the asphalt of a rest stop in the middle of America and happily stay there forever, and the nights he’s too keyed up to sleep. It’s alienating. He feels unmoored, drowning in all of his too-big emotions. Without the chaos of four other boys to keep him distracted, to keep him grounded, he’s afraid it's only a matter of time until he loses himself in it for good.
But then there’s Louis. Through it all, there’s still Louis. Waiting for Harry at the end of every show, ready with a bottle of water and sweet words of praise, beside him in dressing rooms, challenging him to ping pong tournaments to pass the long, empty, waiting hours, and holding him through the restless nights, soothing him with reassurances that he’s there, that he understands, and promising that he will never, ever, let Harry truly get lost.
- - - - - - - - - - - -
A collection of timestamps spanning the 2017 leg of Love on Tour.
True North by navigator, quitter (25k)
Altered-canon non-au set between November 2012 and January 7th, 2013.
Every Arrow That I Aim Is True by estrella30 (24k)
“I can see you don’t believe me,” Harry says, pretending to be stern. Louis chuckles a little but doesn’t get out of the bed. “Anyway, I texted Liam and told him you’re with me. He said to stay here as long as you need, and he’ll deal with the show over there until you want to come back, all right?”
Louis doesn’t say anything again so Harry whispers, “Just stay here with me for a while, yeah? I’ll take care of you.”
Louis is quiet. He never picks his head up, but Harry can see the pillow move from where he’s nodding and his fingers tighten around Harry’s. “Yeah,” Louis says. “Yeah, all right.”
You Turn Me On, Make You Radiate by ballsdeepinjesus (15k)
When he presses inside for the first time in weeks, he’s pretty sure he sees stars behind his eyes at the staggering sensation of Harry’s body squeezing every inch of him. When he bottoms out, he stays buried inside for a minute just to catch his bearings, listening as Harry takes sharp breaths beneath him. When he finally feels like he’s under control, he presses his lips against Harry’s ear and whispers, “Are you ready husband?"
Harry throws his head back and groans. “Call me your spouse.”
[...or, a self-indulgent snapshot of hl’s sex lives over the course of 10+ years]
I’m Captain On A Jealous Sea by devilinmybrain / @thedevilinmybrain (15k)
It’s not that Louis doesn’t like Nick. He is, if he’s being honest, kind of indifferent. Louis gets that Nick is just doing his job most of the time, being loud and prying, not having boundaries. But it’s just a little too much for Louis’ taste. Louis, who has learned over the years, when to be loud and when to know that coy is the game. But, it doesn’t matter really. He’s not required to like everyone, doesn’t have to make nice with them outside of having a camera shoved in his face. He can let Nick be Nick and it shouldn’t affect Louis at all.
Except.
What Louis actually has a problem with is the way Nick Grimshaw looks at Harry.
To Have and To Hold by sweariwouldnt (15k)
“Do you think maybe…. am I getting cold feet?”
Louis doesn’t know what to say, instead he puts his book away and turns to his side, to face Harry. Harry looks at him from the side of his eye and then focuses his eyes back on the ceiling.
“Do you think you are?”
Harry makes a move resembling a shrug. “I don’t think I am.”
“Do you not…want to get married?” Louis starts hesitantly, knowing that it’s probably even silly to ask but he has to.
Harry turns to him, and takes his hand, kissing the knuckles. “I do, I do the most, it’s what I’ve wanted more than anything, I just… I don’t know. I feel… weird.”
Harry has a habit of planning their wedding when he feels down. It's not ideal, really.
Still I Call It Magic by orphan_account (14k)
non-au. harry and louis before and after concerts throughout the last 4 years.
Stop the World (‘Cause I Wanna Get Off With You) by devilinmybrain / @thedevilinmybrain (12k)
Five times Louis and Harry get walked in on at the worst time, and one time Louis makes sure they don't.
Cut To The Bone by tilthesundies / @tllthesundies (11k)
There are some things Louis can’t understand.
This is one of them.
Harry celebrates his birthday in Japan. Louis stays with him.
Wild Flower, My Face of Love by orphan_account (11k)
It feels like a lifetime’s worth of adoration when Harry kisses him – just to kiss him, just to feel his lips, because even 15 minutes without them is 14 minutes and 59 seconds too many – and when Louis holds him back, wraps his arms and legs and lips around him, it’s like an inexplicable familiarity between their souls that just four years can’t explain.
Or: the one where Jay gets married.
The Ways We Fight by sweariwouldnt (10k)
How Harry and Louis learn to disagree with each other.
Jealousy Loves Company by sweariwouldnt (10k)
How Harry and Louis work together throughout the years to try and keep the green-eyed monster at bay.
Starry Haze, Crystal Ball by you_explode / @nobodymoves (10k)
Freedom.
Harry’s not sure what exactly it means anymore. For him, for Louis. Personally. Professionally. Musically. There are so many layers to it, and it feels like as he gets older, the thicker those layers become.
Non-AU. A brief look at 2020 and the journey Harry and Louis are on with their careers and closet. Inspired by the Devil card.
Read You Like A Book by becka (8k)
Louis realises Harry can read his mind. He'll do anything to make Harry admit it. Set during the North American leg of the WWA tour.
Reminiscing the Other Day by tilthesundies / @tllthesundies (8k)
“Spain,” Harry says. “This weekend.”
Louis blinks. “Are you asking me, or telling me?”
“Asking,” he says with a huff.
Harry's invited to a wedding, and there's only so much Louis can hide.
How I Imagined Us by orphan_account (7k)
“I think about how lucky I am. The whole time, I just keep thinking about how incredibly lucky I am. “
“Because you’re kissing me?”
“Because I’m kissing you and you’re…” Louis stops. Then continues, quietly, “Because you’re the love of my life, Haz.”
New York is one of Harry’s favourites.
[Sometimes reality is shitty and Louis plays Scheherazade.]
In the Heat Where You Lay by orphan_account (7k)
“You’re with me, baby?”
Harry kisses his mouth, pulls him further into their room by his wrists. His large hands come to cup Louis’ face and he kisses Louis so softly, little brushes of their lips like they’re still 16. Harry cradles him. He has to tip downward and hold Louis close because that’s how Harry kisses when they’re in for a long night. As Louis’ senses come back to him, that much he figures out quickly. Harry’s going to fucking ruin him tonight.
“Do you know how much I love you?”
Louis doesn’t respond to the mumbled words against his lips. His fists tighten around the ends of Harry’s shirt and he opens his mouth for Harry’s tongue, hopes that's enough of an answer.
Harry and Louis fuck after Brussels.
Garden of Eden by superglass / @gaymoustache (6k)
Another soft, grainy laugh. A puff from the joint. Green smoke towards the ceiling. Then hazy blue eyes back on his. “Said you wanted to tell me something. Was really important.”
“Oh,” Harry says. There was a reason he came back, an excuse he made up to find Louis and sucker him into letting him sit on his lap even though his weight often puts those thighs to sleep. “Can’t— um. Let me try to remember.”
or
a snapshot of being high and in love in Jamaica.
Right Where You Are, That’s Where I Am by etherealbliss / @givesuethemoon (6k)
It’s been years since they’ve properly said those three words to one another, but now, as they both sit on the floor in this massive room, bodies tanned golden from the sun that’s found them in the middle of rural Sweden… It just feels right.
or
a snapshot of Louis and Harry's time together in Sweden during their two weeks off in August 2022.
No Good Unless It Grows (Feel This Buring, Love of Mine) by iwantstylinson (5k)
It wasn’t until they were settled in and lying idly on the couch with their bodies intertwined that Harry whispered, holding back tears, “I’m not who I want to be.”
Louis leaned down, lips close enough to graze Harry’s cheek, and asked simply, “Well, who do you want to be?”
Harry had thought about growing his hair out for a lot longer than he had even realized.
At the End of My Rope by safona / @saffona (5k)
"Baby?" Harry mumbles, voice laced with sleep and a shiver goes through Louis at hearing the term. He hasn't called him that in so long, in that voice and, clearly, even Louis' body fucking misses it.
"Did you cheat on me?" Louis finds himself asking. If he's being honest it's more so he can see Harry's reaction, than a genuine question, but what has he got to lose?
Sure enough, Harry's face changes from sleepy to the most incredulous look Louis' ever seen on him. He actually looks terrified, all wide eyes, mouth gaping like he can't believe Louis would even assume that and Louis would laugh at it, but he's so done with the way Harry's been acting, he just wants to know what the hell's going on.
Light Me Up by ashavahishta / @ashavahishta(4k)
Harry and Louis' first days at home after Japan.
Rock Those Blue Jeans, Baby by shakespearesque (4k)
Louis has a hate/love relationship with the video diaries. He has a love/love relationship with Harry, though, and the video diaries don't help with that at all.
A Touch of Your Love by casuallyhl / @casuallyhl (3k)
or; the one where they go to Crete and Harry is definitely hiding something
Brothers? By devilinmybrain / @thedevilinmybrain (3k)
"I mean, I've never had a brother, so maybe what Louis and I do in our free time really is just familial bonding." Harry's grin turns wicked, gets that little glint in his eye that unfairly makes Louis' cock jump again. "We just do what other brothers do, right? No funny business."
A Complainy Popstar by snsk / @snsknene (2k)
Harry wants a baby. He settles for a pet rat. Louis sort of hates the pet rat very much a lot.
Living Love in Slow Motion by ashavahishta / @ashavahishta (2k)
Just a typical Sunday morning
One Day Like This by navigator (2k)
Sleepy non-au set the morning of May 3, 2013.
You’ll Never Need to Doubt It by supernope (1k)
Louis has cinnamon swirl hair and Love, Actually on DVD, and they've got five hours to Dallas, and everything is fluff.
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