anonymous-dentist
11 Foot Tall Canon God
A.D. | She/her! | QSMP and Hermitcraft | q!Cellbit Apologist | Breaking Dawn and Bad Romance author | Banner and PFP by @Comfymoth
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Anything to do with little pepito?
Pepito misses Apa Roier.
“He’ll be back before you know it,” Awuelo Foolish says, and he’s always right!!! Because he’s Awuelo Foolish, and he’s sooooo smart!!
But Pepito still misses Apa Roier.
“Don’t worry, I’m keeping an eye out for him,” Tía Bagi says, and so Pepito feels much better. Because she’s a detective and she’s smart and she’s Pepito’s Tía so she wouldn’t lie to Pepito!
…But Pepito still misses Apa Roier.
Pepito looks up at the big statue of Hermano Bolby.
“I’ll get him back,” Pepito tells him. Because Hermano Bolby is Pepito’s Big Brother, and he has to be very scared. But Pepito isn’t scared! Pepito is a big Pepito!
But Pepito misses Apa Roier.
(Sometimes, Pepito just feels… little.)
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something with croier and fcellbit? im obsessed with how you write croier, i would love to see a bit more of it !
Now, Roier absolutely adores his fiancé, but he also sometimes kinda just wants to plunge a knife into Cell’s ear and carve a hole in his eardrum to make sure he fucking listens when Roier is talking to him.
“I love you,” Roier whispers, right into Cell’s perfectly-functioning ear.
But Cell doesn’t respond. He just keeps working at chopping their latest victim into bite-sized pieces, the absolute idiot.
Roier wants to make Cell bleed. He wants Cell to writhe under his body and scream his name and beg, and it’ll be so beautiful, because Cell is beautiful; naturally, his blood would be just as stunning as he is. If Cell is bleeding, and if he’s bleeding because of Roier, then he will actually be paying attention for once in his goddamn life.
Roier whines and drapes himself over Cell’s shoulders. “Pay attention to meeeee.”
“I am,” Cell patiently says. He turns his head and nuzzles his nose against Roier’s cheek. “There, happy?”
Roier shakes his head. “Say it back.”
Cell doesn’t.
Roier wants to press him into a bed and carve his heart out and make him choke on it.
In one swift motion, Roier grabs a knife off the counter and presses the point of it against Cell’s throat.
“What did I tell you? If you’re going for the throat, you don’t want to stab it. It’s too narrow, you’ll miss.” Cell sighs. He reaches up and adjusts the knife so that it’s poised to slit his throat instead. “There.”
He sighs again, much more faint with the knife to his neck.
“I love you,” he says, “but you really need to start remembering these things. If you fuck up the next time that detective woman finds us, you could end up dead. And then what?”
Roier smiles; Cell does love him!
“You’d escape?”
Cell scoffs. “No, I’d die, too, idiot.”
He’s sooooo romantic! Roier could just eat him up! (Though he’ll be polite and wait to do so until after the funeral.)
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something with pepito and his apa cellbi pls i need more things with them ❤️😭
Today, Pepito is on the floor of the Manor watching as Cellbit and Richarlyson keep working on the roof- the fucking roof.
Cellbit is so high up that he can’t quite see what Pepito is doing, but he’s still within earshot, and he can just barely make out the sounds of barely-stifled sobs.
Immediately, Cellbit is leaping down from the roof. He lands a pretty sick water drop, and then he drops to the floor by Pepito’s side with a frown.
Pepito immediately pulls his gas mask down over his face so Cellbit can’t see his face.
“I’m doing a puzzle,” Pepito says. He points at the floor in front of him and, yes, indeed, there is a puzzle there. A jigsaw puzzle with only a few pieces set down, the rest scattered in frustration.
“I see,” Cellbit calmly says. “Do you want my help?”
Pepito shakes his head. “No, Pepito can do it. Pepito is a smart Pepito.”
“That’s right. But even smart people can get stuck on puzzles sometimes. I do.”
“Nuh-uh,” Pepito protests. “Apa Roier says you’re the smartest guy ever!”
Cellbit blushes. “Well. Uh. Even so! I get stuck sometimes.”
Pepito looks back down at his puzzle. “I can do this. We’re both Smart Pepitos.”
Cellbit ruffles Pepito’s hair. “And you’re the smartest Pepito of all.”
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Personal headcannon, the reason the Brazilian pack haven't turned Cellbit yet is because they saw him eat Pac's leg and thought "We can't make him any more powerful"
The truth is actually much funnier.
So Felps shows back up after Cell has escaped from prison, and they somehow become legitimately good friends. Eventually, Felps is like "Welp! Time to settle down and join a pack! Maybe my new best friend will want to join! :D" and he fully just asks Cell (not yet Cellbit) if he would want to be turned into a lobisomem, too, so they could hang out together as ugly dog things in the woods together. You know, normal best friend activities! :D
And Cell, who is just starting to become a Normal Human Being for the first time in his life, is like "...Not now, but if I'm thirty and I'm still not a werewolf or whatever, yeah, you can turn me." Because he didn't believe in the supernatural at the time, he just thought that this was some kind of weird marriage proposal. And he loved Felps, just not quite in that way, but he wanted to let him down gently.
Felps, unfortunately, fully just took that as 'Please turn me into a lobisomem when I'm 30 years old if I'm not one already', so he's been telling Pac and Mike to wait on turning Cellbit for years so he can be the one to do it. And the rest of the pack is just fine with waiting.
There's a literal timer on Felps' phone counting down to Cellbit's 30th birthday. Meanwhile Cellbit has no fucking clue about any of this and will later hope that him marrying Roier means that Felps will give up on the whole timer thing. (It will not.)
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guys i'm having the best dnd session rn, the devil just showed up!!!!!!!!
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guys i'm so excited for the spiderbit zine aaaaaaa it's going to be so cool!!! there are so many talented people in this community and it's going to be AWESOME!!!
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help lore heavily suggested cellbit start drinking his wine out of the coffee mug WHICH IS NOT BECAUSE HE BREAKS THE GLASSES ITS NOT!!! so now hes drinking wine out of a coffee mug
#kind of a vibe tbh#I don’t drink but I’d probably take my wine in a mug#wine glasses look too shatter-y
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I sincerely hope that the guapoverse tags leading to the qsmp on ao3 doesn’t end with anybody harassing ao3 tag wranglers or volunteers. I know it’s disappointing, but it was either the qsmp tag or the video/blogging rpf tag
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Cellbit: Dude, this is the most difficult thing that- that I’ve had to do up until now. Solving the enigmas, dude, didn’t even come close to this. I have to lie to everyone I like. I have to see everyone who trusted me slowly becoming disappointed. I have to take that all quietly and continue saying the biggest atrocities that I disagree with just to get some information. Something!
-
Cellbit: It’s like if you looked someone in the face and said the worst things you can think of knowing that you’re doing it to protect them, you know? Ultimately, you're doing it for their own good, but you're hurting them now for- for a greater good. It really sucks, dude. It really sucks. Like the things I had to say to Forever, the things I had to say to- to Badboy. The things I have to say to everyone, dude. Like everyone using my own arguments against me. (Laughs) And I being forced to try to refute my own head.
-
Cellbit: And I'm trying to make things very obvious. I'm trying sometimes, like, I'm trying my best to leave books accessible in obvious places- in obvious chests. And say things that I would NEVER say to them. They know, at least deep down, they have a little suspicion that it doesn't make sense. And maybe they can read- Because Cucurucho, he has one problem. He doesn't have the social tact that humans do. He doesn’t- He doesn’t function like a human being. He has letters saying that he doesn't understand how pronouns work and doesn't know what feelings and wants are. He knows what feelings are, but he doesn't know what it's like to have feelings according to what he said. He doesn’t know what are- He has a letter where he says, “I don’t know what is want.”
Cellbit: Thinking about that, the only way I can get around it is by leaving purposeful nuances that I'm saying absurd things so that if you see me from a distance and you don't know me it looks like I'm- that I'm an asshole and I'm really fighting with them but the people who know me, who’ve been with me over these last- All this time on the island and still love me and know I’d never say those things, “No, dude, it doesn't make sense that he's saying these things. It must have some purpose. That logic doesn’t make sense.” It has to make A BIT of sense for Cucurucho to believe it but it can’t make so much sense that my friends don’t doubt at least a little bit. Those who know me know. I'm relying on that.
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kitty cats…………………
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Awww I just saw Lore’s post. Congrats to them!!
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Since it’s a long while away, I don’t mind saying the general premise of the fic I’m working with here:
“There’s a vampire in Quesadilla City, Cellbit hears. It’s a shame vampires don’t exist. This is probably a serial killer working off of public fear of vampires to try and get popular, he’s read about this kind of thing before.
Doesn’t mean he doesn’t get invited by the police to help investigate (thanks, boss…)
The detective assigned to help him is a new one: Bagi, a recent hire who kind of gives Cellbit the creeps.
But Bagi’s mind isn’t on the case. She doesn’t know what to think of Cellbit, and she doesn’t want to think of Cellbit. There are more important things on her mind, like demons. And her girlfriend. And their daughter.
She already knows the vampire’s identity, anyway. And she can guarantee they’ll never be caught.”
Like. It’s so fun!! I can’t wait!!
Since I’ve been talking about what I want in the breaking dawn sequel with Loboier and Puppito, it’s only fair that I bring up the other major change to the cast: Bagi, because the way the story is looking will have her and Cellbit alternating chapter povs
Bagi, in this universe, is a detective. She’s been trying to track down her brother since he vanished at school as a kid, but she’s kinda gotten sidetracked with both becoming a vampire and with. Tina 🥰
She and Cellbit won’t get along immediately, but they will be friends. Neither recognizes each other, but maybe that’s for the best considering the plot of the story lol
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I think that Bagi might just enter the story with Empanada. That brings Mousey into the story, too. And Niki I think? But idk if they’ll appear too often, they’ll probably end up like Pac and Mike did in breaking dawn.
Tina though! She’s a central character. Good for her tbh
Since I’ve been talking about what I want in the breaking dawn sequel with Loboier and Puppito, it’s only fair that I bring up the other major change to the cast: Bagi, because the way the story is looking will have her and Cellbit alternating chapter povs
Bagi, in this universe, is a detective. She’s been trying to track down her brother since he vanished at school as a kid, but she’s kinda gotten sidetracked with both becoming a vampire and with. Tina 🥰
She and Cellbit won’t get along immediately, but they will be friends. Neither recognizes each other, but maybe that’s for the best considering the plot of the story lol
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