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#been changing her look a bit as you may be able to tell
breezypunk · 4 months
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"She's just so... hauntingly beautiful.. Scary, but.. beautiful. You can't look away even if you wanted to, she captures your soul with her eyes. I'd be careful if I were you, you may just fall into her trap."
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some alternative shots, I was quite hard on myself with these ones, I loved them and than I didn't. But overall I know they came out nicely so I'm gonna throw them here too, as.. outtakes :)
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just-jordie-things · 3 months
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let the light in - ryomen sukuna
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✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ 10k follower event special! ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
word count: 15.5k warnings: mentions of fighting and injuries, reader has a cursed technique but i don't describe it bc i'm lazy, she's actually pretty weak in this ngl i needed her to be a bit of a damsel in distress. sukuna is pretty out of character but he has to be. also sukuna can take control of yuji's body when he's asleep bc i decided so ok it's my first time writing for him so bare with me. summary: reincarnation!au with a twist. in every life sukuna finds you in, he has to remind you of who you once were- and who you once were to each other. it's a burden, but it's one he's carried for centuries and he wouldn't have it any other way. more info: slowburn enemies to ?? to lovers, sukuna is hopelessly in love with reader its very fun ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
[ ooh let the light in // at your back door yelling cause i wanna come in // ooh turn your light on // look at us, you and i back at it again ]
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
Finding her in this life was the first thing on his mind as soon as his consciousness was manifested.  Just like every era before this one, she’s always his first thought.
The second thought was- what the fuck? 
In all of his centuries walking this earth, he’d never been quite out of body like this.  As in, in a completely different body from his own.  And much to his displeasure, he’d manifested inside of some brat jujutsu sorcerer that was a bit too strong for his own good.  No worries, though, after they tracked down a few more of his cursed fingers he’d be able to take proper control and Itadori Yuji would cease to exist as soon as Sukuna regained his full strength.
So for some time, he played nice.  Or, as nice as he could, that was.  He sat back in his domain and waited.  He’d never been one with a strong sense of patience- he may have been a man once but he was a curse now- but if it meant strengthening his chances in being reunited with her sooner, then he would play the long game.  Besides, he could have some fun torturing the brat and his friends for a little while, right? No harm in some chaos and carnage along the way.  He would need good stories to tell her when they were together again, anyways.
There were times where the brat began to wonder what it was Sukuna was doing there, quietly tucked into his domain.  On the rare occasion that he didn’t rear his head into conversation with a nasty comment coming from a mouth materialized on his cheek or the back of his hand.  Times passed where Yuji would cringe awaiting Sukuna’s inevitable filth, but instead he was gifted with silence from the curse inhabiting him.  The young sorcerer could only assume that this meant he was doing something else- but what? What could he possibly occupy himself with while trapped in his own domain? Some days Yuji worried he was plotting something, but others he wondered if the King of Curses was just lost in thought.  Did he daydream?
Sukuna wouldn’t call it that, but if anyone were able to catch him in the act, they’d know it was exactly that.  All he could do with his time is imagine how he’d reunite with her in this life.  It was one of his favorite parts of each new century or so, and after hundreds of lifetimes, there were plenty of memories to keep himself occupied with.
This time he knew he’d have to outdo himself, seeing as he was in an unfamiliar body, and he could only hope that she liked this one as much as the last.  Perhaps the next time he took control of it he’d make sure everything was up to standard- he couldn’t have her rejecting him just because he was in some brat’s body this time.  On the other hand, he knew her to be more playful and experimental than he was, so maybe she’d find a change in host exciting.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
To his delight, Sukuna is reunited with the great love of his life sooner than expected.  To his great displeasure, it’s at exactly the wrong time.
He’d been irritated enough having his brat vessel tap out just because he couldn’t take on a measly little Special Grade.  Of course, he wasn’t about to appease some righteous jujutsu sorcerer’s agenda by exorcizing the curse himself.  But in the end, the curse disappointed him too, thinking that it could pick a fight with the King of Curses and come out of it alive.
Pride outweighed vengeance, and he found himself entertained with playing with the Special Grade.  Playing, because of course it’s abilities were weak compared to real jujutsu, unlike the childish display the brat had put up first.
He’s so drawn in by his play fight with the curse that he’d completely missed her- that is until he’s using his Domain Expansion, and from the corner of one of his eyes he finally notices.
While it’s a shock that he’s managed to let the great love of his life go unnoticed, she isn’t exactly… conscious.
The special grade is sliced diced and forgotten, barely even a blip in Sukuna’s memory now once he recognizes the slumped over body on a pile of rubble a few hundred feet away.  He’s delighted, ecstatic even.  The bloodthirsty grin on his face is replaced by a beam of pure thrill.  He’d previously thought it might take years to find her in this life, so to stumble across her now, after getting control of this body over a mere pest, was a real treat.
He approaches her limp body so quickly he’s practically teleported to her, and his beam begins to falter as he takes in her current state.
It’s not a matter of worry that she’s fairly beat up and knocked unconscious so hard there’s soft snores between heavy breaths, her mortal body working overtime to keep her alive at all- it was nothing a quick use of his Reverse Cursed Technique couldn’t fix.
The wince of disgust that contorts his features is directed solely at her attire.  
Crisp black button up torn open to reveal the same shade of undershirt snugly fitting her underneath, paired with pants of the same material.  He didn’t need to see the crest at the collar of her shirt to give him further context as to what she was up to in this century.
“Of course,” He utters through his snarl as he crouches down towards her, hands glowing as he promptly heals her wounds.  She doesn’t awaken, her body growing even more exhausted after being put through the technique, but her muscles do appear to relax as she slumps further into the dirty ground.  “You would be a sorcerer in this lifetime.  Idiot,” 
The cruel name falls from his lips with nothing but melted affection.  No other person on this earth would be allowed to hear him speak this way and live to tell the tale.  It was reserved only for her- and she wasn’t even awake to hear it now.
With steady hands Sukuna gathers her in his arms, trying to bend her into a more comfortable position.  She doesn’t wince or complain when bruised limbs drag across broken slabs of concrete.  If he wasn’t able to hear the steady beat of her heart, she would have easily been mistaken for dead already.
“A shitty reunion this time around, I’m afraid,” 
Sukuna sighs before he sits fully on the ground.  He’s not sure how much longer he’d be in control of this body, but any thoughts of fleeing to bring as much destruction to Tokyo is far from his mind.  He wants nothing more than to sit here with his lover and hope that she’d wake back up before he’s dragged back into his domain.
With one arm wrapped under her shoulders to keep her limp body closely tucked to him, his free hand brushes the messy strands of hair away from her resting face.  She looks peaceful, even though when she wakes she’d still carry the aches of her healed injuries.  The tips of his fingers linger over her soft cheek as he admires her.
“Just as beautiful in this life as you were in every one before it, my love,” He murmurs, so quiet that even if she were conscious enough to hear it, she probably wouldn’t have.
He only gets a few moments of peace with her before he can feel a stir from inside of him, and he can faintly make out Yuji gaining his consciousness back.  He snarls in his aggravation, wishing he could knock the brat out so he could get just a little more time with his long lost love, even if she wasn’t her usual lively self.
“Come, we have things to do” He tells her, before he pulls her closer and lifts her up.  
He makes his way out of the destroyed building with leisure, knowing that the other sorcerer, Fushiguro, would be waiting outside for a fight.  It wasn’t in his plans to end the kid’s life just yet, but with the reunion of his one true love coming prematurely, things might have to change.  Oh well, he was flexible.
She fusses in his arms upon the lift, but even with her pinching brows and twitching eyelids, she never quite wakes up.  Which was alright, they would have plenty of time to properly catch up in a bit.  Sukuna had other things to handle first.
It would be some time still before she properly met the King of Curses face to face- in this life anyways- as shortly after his departure of the ruined building, he would have to set her aside to take care of a few of the weaker level shikigamis that the Fushiguro kid sent his way.  After ripping the brat’s heart out of their shared chest, it would be a few weeks before things seemingly transitioned back to normal.
When (y/n) would finally come to in the infirmary a few hours after it all went down, Megumi would relay how the King of Curses had carried her out in his arms.  She’d give him a bitter laugh, thinking he was trying to lighten the mood after the news of the death of their friend.  But Megumi wasn’t usually very good at telling jokes, and after seeing his grave expression stay put, her face would fall.
“You’re serious?” 
Megumi nods, the thin line of his lips unwavering.
(y/n) blinks a few times as she processes it slowly.  She’s still not sure that she believes him, but she doesn’t have a reason not to either.  If Gojo had told her this she’d have rolled her eyes, and maybe called him insensitive and unserious, but why would Megumi make something like that up? 
“I don’t understand,” She tells him with a furrowed brow, and the way Megumi shrugs one shoulder unenthusiastically tells her he didn’t understand it any better than she did.  “You’re telling me he saved me?” 
“Maybe, I don’t know,” Megumi replies dryly.  He should’ve known she’d ask him questions he clearly didn’t have the answers for, so he tried to provide her with what he did know so that maybe she wouldn’t torment him with more of her own questions.  “But he brought you out, and set you down somewhere with your head propped up, and he didn’t try to attack you at all.  At least, it looked like he didn’t” 
Her tongue darts over the dryness of her bottom lip as her jaw hangs open at him.  She doesn’t bother him with more useless questions, but that doesn’t mean the whole ordeal wasn’t plaguing her mind.
Something was very strange about that behavior.  But with Yuji gone, she figured it was no use trying to decipher it all anyways.  Maybe after some time when her grief wears off into something she could live with, she could forget about it completely. 
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
With Yuji turning out to be alive and well, Sukuna’s plans shifted once more.  He’d tortured him as best he could without the ability of taking control of the body, letting his friend be turned into a transfigured human, refusing to kill the spirit that called itself Mahito- as upsetting as it was to his brat vessel, Sukuna cared very little for such trivial events.  In fact, if Yuji were to shut up about it, he probably could have forgotten completely.  He only had one goal on his mind- to return to her again.  Anything else was merely a stepping stone along the way.
Just as before, Sukuna spends most of his time in his domain without much noise.  Except this time, Yuji starts to get an inkling of what he’s doing.
“It’s unbecoming and submissive of you to pretend to be dead,” 
Sukuna taunts one day while Yuji’s working on his ‘training’ on Gojo’s couch while he invests himself with a romantic movie.  His sudden appearance was a good test to his abilities, though, as the sleeping cursed puppet on Yuji’s lap doesn’t stir.  It was safe to say that Yuji had gotten as used to sharing his body with the curse as he was going to get.
“What if your little sorcerer friends need you?” Sukuna chuckles.  He quite enjoys the image of Fushiguro and the little red-headed girl struggling to keep up with mere Second Grade curses.  
“They’re fine” Yuji replies casually, barely paying attention to the mouth on his face that wasn’t his.  The movie was just getting good, after all.
“You think they can manage to hold their own?” Sukuna scoffs at the thought.  “With half-assed cursed techniques like theirs?” 
“Fushiguro and Kugisaki are the most cutthroat people I’ve ever known.  Didn’t Fushiguro almost kick your ass?” Yuji mutters, more irritated than offended by Sukuna’s cruelty.  “You’re just lucky you haven’t had to deal with (y/l/n)” 
So is that what she was calling herself this time? Sukuna’s lips tilt into a smirk.
“She doesn’t seem like much to be afraid of,” The words themselves are harsh, but something in his tone changes.  Enough that Yuji starts to lose focus on the television.  “Last I saw her she was half dead.  If it weren’t for me, she would have been dead-dead” 
That finally catches Yuji’s full attention, and he misses the next few lines of the movie when he asks, “What’s that supposed to mean?” 
Sukuna’s silent, thoughtfully so, as he tries to find just the right way to play his cards.  Does he use his history with the brat’s friend as a scare tactic? Or does he keep that little fact to himself for a while longer? Either way, the longer he’s silent, the more Yuji begins to go stir crazy.
“Hey, you old curse!” He hollers suddenly, causing the cursed puppet in his lap to wake up and start to get aggressive.  Yuji heaves as the tiny thing rears a heavy punch into his gut, but it doesn’t stop him from interrogating the curse inside of him.  “What did you mean by that!?” He huffs out.
Sukuna chuckles, and just as quickly as he’d appeared on Yuuji’s cheek, he disappeared again, hiding away in his domain and entertaining himself with the sight of Yuji getting beat up by a little cursed teddy bear.
Perhaps he’d let the brat overthink for a little while longer, anxiety was a form of suffering after all, wasn’t it? At least watching the brat worry himself sick about it would provide him some amusement for the coming days.  Until the sanction of his fake death is lifted, and he could go back to his goal of being reunited with his love.  
(y/l/n).  Her new surname rings in his head as he settles in his domain and lets his mind begin to wander again.  As pretty as it was, he’d have to return it to the proper name.  His name.
Yuji is attacked by Yaga’s cursed puppet a few more times that evening, but not due to the film changing his range of emotions.  In fact, it was due to his complete lack of focus on the movie.  All he could think about was what business Sukuna could possibly have with (y/n).
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
When he makes his surprise reappearance for his friends, Yuji debates on pulling (y/n) aside and asking her about what Sukuna had mentioned.  But for all he knew, he very well could have been toying with him, and ultimately he decided to enjoy what little time he had to catch up with his friends before they dove into the Exchange Event.  It just didn’t seem worth bringing up at this time.
But for some reason, when she takes her seat as the Tokyo students begin their planning, Yuji’s compelled to sit beside her.  It’s not an odd choice, it’s not out of character for him, she is his friend after all, but he’s quite aware of the way his feet move on their own accord to carry him to the empty seat beside her.  Yuji knows his body, and he knows he wasn’t the one commanding it to do that.
It makes him gulp when he unceremoniously plops into the seat.  (y/n) gives him a look, something crossed between confusion and amusement, but she brushes it off and doesn’t say a word as she shifts her focus back to Maki.  Yuji tries to ignore it as well, a bit embarrassed about the whole display.  Was that really Sukuna? He tried to clear his mind, too, it was quite important that he took in everything Maki was saying, but his mind is wrapped up in whatever game the King of Curses was playing right now.
And finally, when he thinks he’s heard enough of the game plan for the event, he feels it.
The slit under his right eye opens, the side facing (y/n).  Yuji holds his breath, hoping that Sukuna doesn’t open his loud mouth and bark out something insulting, but he doesn’t.  His mouth never materializes.  He simply stares.
It’s almost worse.
A few minutes pass and no one seems to notice, as the attention of the room is still commanded by Maki.  Except for Yuji himself, as he’d stopped listening to her altogether while he anxiously awaited whatever was to come next.  What was he doing? He began to bounce his leg.
His throat closes up when he sees (y/n) turn her head out of the corner of his eye.  He doesn’t meet her gaze, even though she’s clearly staring at him- or Sukuna, he supposes- but she doesn’t speak up.  She’s just as silent as the curse he’s hosting.  Still, her gaze remains on the dark eye peeking out at her.  If they weren’t in a room with all of their peers, Yuji would’ve broken his ignorant demeanor by now, but something inside him tells him to keep his mouth shut.
When the group disbanded for a quick lunch before the event officially started, (y/n) remained seated while the others filtered out, and when Yuji began to stand, she stopped him.  All she’s done is reach a hand out, she barely even touches his arm, but it’s enough for him to stop in his tracks, and he stays put in his seat.
They don’t say anything until the room is empty, and even then, (y/n) chooses to speak quietly, almost under her breath.
“What the hell is going on with…” She pauses, her eyes flickering between Yuji’s and the ones below, before she raises her hand in a small gesture.  “Him?” She mumbles it so low, afraid that saying his name would be enough to summon him, even though he’s so clearly already there before her.
“I don’t-” 
Yuji starts, but before he could say anything- or think of anything to say- Sukuna’s mouth is materializing on his cheek.  It’s an unsettling feeling on its own, but Yuji always felt a certain chill on his spine whenever he’d feel that mouth forming a smile.
“Just missed lookin’ at you, sweetheart” 
Yuji’s face is sickly pale in a matter of seconds, the fear that settles over him tenses up all of his muscles, to the point they ache, and as much as he wants to remove himself (and Sukuna) from this situation, he’s frozen in place.  Too stunned to say anything, too stunned to move, he just stands there helplessly as (y/n’s) wide eyes dart between both pairs on his face.
(y/n’s) reaction comes first, the shocked expression wearing off into something else.  Yuji can’t place what it is- anger, disgust- but she loses the desire to keep the conversation quiet as reality settles over her.
“What!?” It comes out in a screech, but it’s just as quickly followed by absolute rambling.  “What the hell are you talking about? What the hell is he talking about?” She awkwardly shifts her gaze between both sets of eyes, unsure and unfamiliar with how to communicate with the both of them.
“I- I don’t-” 
Again, Yuji’s interrupted before he can come up with anything.
“We still have all the time in the world, for now you just keep your pretty little head focused on this game of yours, hm?” 
Just like that, the fanged mouth is disappearing and Yuji’s cheek is returned to it’s normal state again.
(y/n) blinks, going silent again while her face is flushing with color.  Now her eyes seem to focus on the lower, darker pair of eyes.  It’s hard to gauge what Sukuna is thinking, or feeling.  With only a narrowed set of eyes to go off of, not to mention he’s a reckless curse, he’s not a man, she doesn’t know what to make of the interaction.
But with the memory of what Megumi had told her, a dread begins to weigh down her chest.  Whatever this behavior was about, it couldn’t mean anything could.  It was unwanted attention, that was for sure.  No matter how warm her face felt, or how nervous she suddenly was just being around Yuji.
Soon enough the eyes shut too, but even though it appears it’s only her and Yuji in the room, she can still feel Sukuna’s presence.  She swallows the lump in her throat like it’s lead.
“Let’s just…” Her eyes flit away from the closed lids, meeting Yuji’s warm but worried gaze again.  She’s not sure if it’s a comfort or not that he seems just as anxious as she feels.  “Let’s just get through the Exchange Event first” She suggests.
She’s sure that this is the right choice of action.  There was simply no time to dwell on Sukuna’s out of character behavior- then again she didn’t know him, she didn’t know what was in character, he was a curse!- not with all of their peers relying on them to secure the win for the Tokyo Prefecture.
Although she couldn’t deny her head wasn’t exactly in the game during the event.  When she finds herself getting sloppy, taking hits she normally should have been able to dodge, she begins to curse the King of Curses himself.  Surely this whole thing was an act, that was what he was best at, wasn’t it? Torture? Mind games? He was probably laughing it up in his domain watching her struggle so miserably at an event she couldn’t have been more prepared for.
When shit really hit the fan and curses and curse users reared their ugly heads in the middle of a semi-light hearted game, it dawned on her just how out of it she’d really become.  Suddenly it didn’t matter how Mai shouldn’t have been able to get that shot at her shoulder- or how she should’ve seen Miwa’s Domain Expansion coming.  There was no way she was going to let a curse like him get in her head and keep her from protecting her friends and herself from a real threat.
And once this attack in the middle of their event was taken care of and the scores were settled, she’d find a way to give the King of Curses a piece of her mind.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
That time came sooner than expected, and it’s seemingly out of nowhere when he pays her a little visit.
Deep down she knows that she should be terrified when the King of Curses is at her door requesting her time for ‘a talk’ as he called it.  A thousand questions should flood her mind, and after some time they’ll begin to register, slowly and one by one, far later than it’s appropriate to ask.
He’d gotten her alone, and this should terrify her further, she should feel like a lamb in the presence of a wolf- no- curse.  But for some reason, when he enters the training room she’d been doing warm ups in, all she does is stare at him.
Sukuna knows that there’s no way she could have mistaken him for the brat, not with all of his markings, not with his vermillion eyes, not with the abundant amount of cursed energy he carried with him.  Any other mortal would straighten up, freeze in place and stare at him in utter fear as they waited for whatever fate he bestowed upon them.
Not her.
Foolishly, he believes this is due to the lifetimes they’d spent together before this one.  Even though he’s well aware of the rules of the courtship.  He recalls many meetings before this one where he’d had to open her eyes to the Binding Vow that brought her back in every lifetime.  Still, he naively held onto a hope that her lack of reaction to his presence now is because somewhere inside of her, she knows she doesn’t need to be afraid of him like the others.
(y/n’s) true feelings couldn’t have been farther from his assumptions.  It may have been a moment of poor judgment, but the moment he’d materialized at that door, irritation overrode self preservation.  It didn’t matter that the cursed energy he carried was so heavy it was palpable.  
She took one look at the King of Curses and furrowed her brows like she was a child he’d wronged, and there wasn’t an ounce of fear for her life when she’s the first to speak.
“What the fuck are you doing out?” 
Out, it’s a funny choice of word, isn’t it? Sukuna can’t help the chuckle of amusement.  Did she mean out and about, casually roaming the sacred grounds, or could she have meant out due to his control over the brat’s body? 
A frown settles on her lips when she sees he’s already enjoying himself.  She should be wondering what he’s been up to before he came here, or when exactly it was he gained control over Yuji’s body.
“And what happened to-” 
Before she could fully voice her worry for her friend, Sukuna’s waving a dismissive hand.
“The brat’s fine, not everything has to be about him, you know” He scolds her as if this was a conversation they’d had a hundred times before now.  Her frown deepens.
“Forgive me for caring more about him than a curse like you” She scoffs back at him.
How was it that in every lifetime she had to have that same bad attitude? Of course eventually she’d always settle down and warm back up to him, century and century again.  Some cases took days, others years, and Sukuna was starting to get a feeling that due to the circumstances they found themselves in this time around, this case could be the latter.  He frowns at the thought.
He found her so quickly this time, why did she have to be so stubborn? 
“Always such a brat, I can hardly tell the difference between you,” He replies.
The look of disgust on her face is washed away by mild surprise.  Both from the soft and easy cadence of his usually rough and cruel voice, and from the realization that he probably should have killed her for talking back to him the way she did.  Now she starts to wonder just how many buttons she can push before she sees the true side of the King of Curses.
Her brows pinch together as she watches him with calculations behind her eyes.  Was this all a part of the act from before? 
“How interesting could things have been if you’d swallowed the finger that day and not this brat, hm?” He muses, and he seems genuinely curious about it.  
(y/n) can barely keep up with him, trying too hard to jump to conclusions before he’s revealed them.  Then again, there might be nothing to understand at all- this was all a part of the mind games, wasn’t it? She makes a mental note to meet with Gojo about this.  Sukuna must’ve had greater plans in mind that the strongest sorcerer should be looped in on.  Even if so far… he hadn’t exactly done anything… just made her friendship with Yuji fairly awkward.
Sukuna hasn’t moved from the doorway.  Her eyes sweep over him carefully as she wonders if this is purposeful.  If his motive is to give her a false sense of safety.
“Humor me for a moment, (y/n)” 
He sounds out her name like it’s an unfamiliar word, and for the first time since he’d appeared minutes prior, there’s a familiar hollow in her chest.  At first she tags it as distress, but the way it lingers like a dull ache has her double guessing it’s cause.
“What?” 
No should’ve been what came out of her mouth- if anything needed to be said at all.  Would he let her leave if she tried? Would he punish her for it? However, despite every instinct begging to drag her in a different direction, she can’t help the intrigue she feels for him.
“What’re you doing here as a sorcerer?” He hums again with his question, eyes narrowing on her slightly as he takes account of her every reaction.
She’s holding her breath right now, it’s obvious in her tense jaw and unmoving chest.  Not even a strand of hair waves in it’s place.  Every part of her is so still, he could easily mistake it as her natural instinct to fear him as her natural predator.  He knows this isn’t the case.
She opens her mouth to protest the question at first, but just as quickly, her jaw slacks, and she’s closing it softly as she sits on it a little more thoughtfully.
“Why do you ask?” 
It irks him to have a question answered with another question.  This was another quirk of hers that she always had in the earlier stages of their reunion.  Even with the grain of irritation, Sukuna still finds himself amused in the way that she truly is the same person in every lifetime.  She may have different names, and occasionally a feature or two isn’t quite how he remembered it- and trust him, he remembered- but her soul remained pure, unfiltered, unchanging.  She was always his.
“The last we spoke, you had quite the unshakable opinion about a society that breeds and boasts of it’s powerful children to protect them, only to leave them in neglect…” He trails off, scanning her features in the search of any flash of recognition.  If anything, she’s only more confused.  Her brows are furrowed and her lips have formed a pout which he deemed as her sign of defeat in trying to understand him.  “Something about creating the things you fear.  But it was quite some time ago, and I see you’ve so clearly changed your mind” He raises a hand, palm up as he lazily gestures to her.
(y/n’s) posture straightens up, partially out of her defensive nature, but mostly due to the seriousness in his tone.  Logic tells her she shouldn’t be taking anything he says as truth, it would be foolish, and in the end probably deadly too.
But that intrigue hits her, ignites a tiny spark in her chest that has her longing to learn more.  The intensity tells her that if he weren’t this curse, that perhaps if he was just a man, she might humor him in the way he was looking for.
If she began the what if game now, she feared she’d find herself justifying her continuation of this conversation.
“You must have me confused, then” 
Her words are clear and concise without being loud.
“I haven’t confused you in any century before this one and I would never confuse you in the ones to come after,” 
She tries to hide the surprise in her expression, but she knows she fails.  Especially when Sukuna’s amusement in her reaction seems more genuine than before.  He takes a step into the room, just a single one.
“Your brat friend is fine.  He fell asleep.  We have a sort of… deal,” 
There is some comfort in his words, even if (y/n) is unsure about her trust in him, the words still hit her chest and her shoulders slowly begin to untense.  She doesn’t question him, doesn’t make any comment at all.  She supposes he’ll fill the silence eventually, and her assumption is correct.
“You and I have known each other for quite some time,” He continues.  “Long ago, you made a Binding Vow to me.  A vow that allowed your mortal body to be reborn in every lifetime, so that I may find you” 
Her brows furrow, hardly believing this to be the truth.  She’s supposed to believe a Binding Vow could hold the power to reincarnate her? A quiet scoff blows past her lips.
“Incredible,” She murmurs, but it’s clear her astonishment isn’t enthusiastic.  It’s cynical.  “What sort of entertainment do you really gain from this?” 
She asks, crossing her arms over her chest as she dares a few steps forward.  She’s not all that close to him, but at the end of the day it didn’t matter her distance from Sukuna, the radius of his danger could stretch for miles.
“You never believe me right away” He muses, his hands folding behind his back as he regards her curiously.  It makes her feel like a specimen, like a wild animal he’s just stumbled upon, but she doesn’t shrink under the intensity of his gaze.
“Would you?”
It’s not the response he’s expecting, but his eyes light up with a flicker of excitement.
“Of course not,” He answers, his lips beginning to curl into a smile.  It should send a chill down her spine, but she takes another step forward and tilts her chin up higher.  So foolish, he thinks with an air of loveliness wrapped around it, don’t you see that the mere fact I let you live for behaving like this must mean there’s some truth in my words? Instead, he tells her “Yet, you fall every time”
“I fall for the trick?” She snaps, but her intrigue remains.
“You fall for me” He clarifies, a finality in his tone that has her shutting up, albeit momentarily.
No, she must’ve been right, it was all some grand trick.  Some ridiculous, theatrical ploy he’d come up with just to deceive her.  She’s not sure of the why yet- if he wanted to kill her, couldn’t he have done it already? If he wanted to torture her, couldn’t he have chained her up by now? She’s skeptical, but she would hate to admit that some part of her, deep, deep down, considers that he may not be lying to her.
Of course he must be lying, so she tries to shove that idea down.
“And why would I do such a thing like that?” She asks, her tone bored, but the wideness in her eyes as she awaited his answer didn’t go unnoticed.  
Sukuna unfolded his hands in order to push them into the pockets of Yuji’s pants.  His grievance in wearing a sorcerer’s uniform was obvious in the unsavory curl in his lips as he briefly glanced down at himself, but his attention returned to her just as quickly.
“A Binding Vow is a double sided contract,” He reminds her.  “You entered it willingly,” He tilts his head at her as he watches her process this information, before he tells her the full truth.  “In fact, you were the one who brought the idea to me, sweetheart” 
“Don’t call me that” She mutters out quickly, not thinking twice about the consequences of scolding the King of Curses.
“It’s true,” Sukuna shrugs his shoulders with a lazy drag.  “I almost didn’t agree to it.  But you’ve always been… convincing” 
She’s not sure what he means, because the memories he’s recalling aren’t shared- if they’re real memories at all- and yet, she continues to lay her questions on thick.
“And why wouldn’t I choose to remember all of this then, hm? If I chose to be reborn, over and over, why wouldn’t I have wanted to remember?” She’s challenging him, and Sukuna’s enjoying it, even if it means that right now the distance she puts between them is further than before he’d found her due to her distrust in him.
History has repeated itself for thousands of years, but no event was as perfectly cyclical as she was to him.  Time and time again he would find her, and in every lifetime, she’d been his.
“You wanted to,” He tells her.  “The vow took a bit of a different turn than expected.  See, your soul didn’t simply leap into a pre-existing person with each reincarnate.  You were born again.  Every part of your being, physical and… otherwise, was reborn.  It actually makes it all the more difficult to find you, you know” 
“Seems like a copout” She says, her expression unamused.
“Well go on then, what else do you want to ask me?”
“I have nothing,” She lies.  “Because I’m not entertaining this any further” 
“Fine, then,” To her surprise, Sukuna actually accepts her rejection- if you could call it that.  “I’ll give the brat his body back.  But you’ll know where to find me once you start to remember” 
He leaves without a word, not even a mere wave, and it’s not until he’s gone that (y/n) wonders if she should be worried about him roaming the grounds of Jujutsu Tech, but nothing happens.
In fact it’s such a quiet night that the next morning everyone seems well rested and rejuvenated, all in good spirits and ready to take on the day.  Everyone but her.  And she can’t stop her eyes from shifting towards Yuji every thirty seconds, always double checking the slits under his eyes, as if one of these times she’d find them open and focused on her.
She can’t get the image of Sukuna lounging so casually in that training room.  It’s hard when one of her closest friends shares his face, so even when she’s not anxious about seeing that second set of eyes, her heart still skips a beat when Yuji’s eyes catch hers and he smiles politely.
Naturally, that skip in her heart was due to her nerves, and had nothing to do with the contents of her discussion with the curse inside of him.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
Sukuna gives (y/n) what he believes to be an abundant amount of time to let their past settle in.  He wants her to process it all properly.  He wants her to come to her senses and realize that there were no ulterior motives in his reveal.
He still makes the occasional crude comment from Yuji’s cheek, but while they’re ever directed at her, she finds her posture straightening and her eyes trained on the skin where he’s materialized, always waiting for him to direct something her way.  He doesn’t.  He hardly even looks at her- when she’s looking, that is.  While inside of his domain and perfectly hidden by Itadori Yuji, Sukuna spends as much of his time staring at her while he can.  Some days, there’s an intensity so strong that Yuji finds himself not-so-subtly staring at her too.  Sukuna doesn’t like this- if he had things his way then no one would lay there eyes on what was his- but letting Yuji sneak glances here and there was a small price to pay in order to make sure the pair remain close enough that Sukuna’s still able to have some sense of nearness to her.
Due to this silent period on his part, (y/n) decides against bringing Gojo’s attention to the situation.  While she knows it hasn’t just disappeared, because she just knows that it will be brought up again, she hopes that enough time passes that she can learn to brush it off as nonsense spewed from a bored curse.
It nags at her, despite her best efforts, she never allows herself to forget it completely.  It crosses her mind every day, if not every minute she spends with Yuji.  The way he stood, the way he spoke, it would play on a loop in her mind until she was sure it would drive her to the point of madness.  It very well could have, already.
And one night, she decides to take the reins into her own hands, and she approaches it first.
After watching a partial movie in the common room, Megumi had long gone to bed and Nobara had crashed on a makeshift pile of blankets on the floor, (y/n) feels an anxiousness settle over her when she hears Yuji begin to snore and he, too, was just as knocked out as the rest of her friends.
She debates on it for a moment, her eyes sliding between the flickering television and the resting boy sitting beside her on the couch.  Her index finger taps at an unkept pace against her knee, and she lets as many minutes pass as she could, just to be sure Yuji truly was asleep.
Then she turned her head fully, eyes focused on that mark under his face where Sukuna’s eyes were peacefully shut.  Not sure of the inner workings on how the whole vessel thing worked, her only choice was to take a shot in the dark and hope it worked.
“I was going to tell Gojo about what you said, you know” 
Her whisper is so soft, her voice cracks and gives on certain syllables.  Even if he could hear her from in there, she wonders if he could have heard something so silently spoken.
Slowly, the eye opens, and it blinks a few times before it slides towards her.  She wonders if he sleeps in there, or if every introduction light when he leaves his domain requires an adjustment.
And then, Yuij’s stirs, and (y/n) freezes up, watching as he twitches before his eyes begin to blink awake, as well.  Fear spikes in her chest at the thought of getting caught talking to the curse inside of him while he slept.
But when his eyes fully open and an array of markings begin to paint across his features, she realizes it’s not Yuji.  It’s just his body.  There’s a certain guilt that follows her relief from this.  In no situation should she feel pleased to see Sukuna over Yuji.
“Am I supposed to be threatened by this?” He asks slowly, in a low tone of voice that she can’t decide the cause of.  Was he trying to be considerate of the sleeping sorcerer on the ground? Or was he just trying to be as menacing and mysterious as always? 
He doesn’t lift his head from where Yuji had been dozed off against the couch cushion, neck craned at an angle that couldn’t be comfortable to sleep in for the entire night, but Sukuna’s not exactly looking out for the brat’s comfort.  He could use a good crick in the neck or two.
“I don’t think there’s anything I could do to threaten you,” (y/n) replies honestly, the hush in her voice making her sound softer than she would’ve liked.  She doesn’t need him thinking she’s warming up to being in his presence, after all.  “But… would you kill me if I was?” 
“What do you think?” 
It comes out fast enough to be taken harshly, like he holds a disbelief in how idiotic she could be, but their conversation began with a whisper and it seems to be carried on that way.  A lump forms in (y/n’s) throat as she holds eye contact with the darkened vermillion ones that stare back at hers.
The deep feeling she’d buried, the one that told her maybe she trusted him whether she liked it or not, sparked and caught light, burned just a little bit brighter, caused just enough smoke for her to give some of her attention to.
If he truly wanted to kill her, he had millions of chances to do so before now.  So she concludes that his goal wasn’t to do so.  Of course, this begs the question,
“What is it that you want, Sukuna?” 
She’s much calmer than the last time they spoke, he notices.  She’s nervous, but not tense, and not nearly as defensive.  He’s not naive, he doesn’t mistake this for trust, but he is pleased in her change in attitude.
An idle smile curls on his lips as his fixed gaze softens with familiarity.
Just like every time before now, she always, eventually, came around to him.  It was like her curiosity couldn’t keep her away, and her heart always won over her mind.
“I believe you already know the answer to that” He refrains from letting an old pet name fall from his tongue, a courtesy to her that he allows this once, just so she wouldn’t flee from her seat next to him.
She hums, letting the sort-of-answer sit on her mind for a moment.  An unknown feeling gnaws at her- or at least, a feeling she doesn’t want to put a name to.
“Why?” The word ghosts off of her lips, and even with the worried knot between her brows her eyes stay set on his.  “Why does it have to be me?” 
“You’re looking at it all wrong,” Sukuna muses, his lower set of eyes rolling just slightly before he can help it.  “It doesn’t have to be you- it just is.  It’s always been you, and it always will be” 
“Because of the Binding Vow?” She questions, and he blinks at her, processing what she meant, before his brows furrow just a little bit, and he shakes his head.
“The only clause to our vow is that you will always be reborn,” His tongue runs over his teeth as he tries to bite back the amusement he feels when realization dawns on her.  “Everything after that comes from your own free will, sweetheart” 
“Don’t call me that” She snaps at him, but it’s a mumble, hardly audible, hardly threatening.  Sukuna purses his lips.
“Like I said, you were the one who came up with the contract,” He huffs.  “I would’ve never agreed to such a thing if you weren’t so persistent” 
She perks up at that little comment, and suddenly turns in her seat, tucking her legs underneath her as she faces him.  Sukuna’s barely moved at all, still slouched into the cushion in the position Yuji had fallen asleep in.  His eyes follow her movements as she sets her elbow on the top of the furniture so she could prop her head in her hand.  Her brows are drawn together again as she studies him.
“Then why tell me about it?” She blurts the question out.
“Because I’m the one burdened with the centuries of memories” He replies without missing a beat, voice dry and expression unreadable.  He’s keeping it as neutral as possible, knowing her calculating eyes would see right through any sudden change, no matter how small.
“And you are?” She asks, and then in a softer voice, finishes the thought, “Burdened?” 
Sukuna blinks, slowly, before letting his gaze wander the soft and curious look on her face.  He fights the urge to smile at the loveliness of it all- the twitch in her nose, the small pout in her lip- he’s the King of Curses and there should be no force on this earth that weakens him the way her gentle gaze focused on him does.  Even after all this time, she is his achilles heel, she is his greatest burden, and she is the only thing he could ever truly, completely, want.
“Yes,” His answer is quiet, and (y/n) lifts her head as she stares at him with her confusion.  “There exists no stronger shackles a being could trap me with the way you have,”
Her face falls, and she’s silent for a long moment.  With a dry throat and a mind too busy and overcrowded with thoughts, she wasn’t sure what she was supposed to say.  But that gnawing feeling was starting to make her chest ache, and the pounding of her heart in her ribcage was relentless.
“There’s no greater curse I could bear” 
She hates the way he says these things so casually, without a strain in his expression or voice.  She wonders if it’s because he’s done it so many times that it’s lost it’s value.  Perhaps to him, this was just a part of the burden that was her existence, explaining these things to her was simply a chore that needed to be completed.  She swallows a few times to ease the dryness of her throat.
“Does it get old?” 
Sukuna smiles.  It should trouble her- he knows that it unsettles Yuji- but if she feels unease it’s not shown.
“A thousand years of anything gets old,” He sighs, rolling his head over the cushion to stare up at the blank ceiling.  “And I’d hate to admit the things that never get old” 
It’s stupid.  It’s ridiculous and foolish and naive, but she smiles.
“What doesn’t get old?” She asks, her curiosity blending with a sick sense of delight as she wonders just how many sides of Sukuna there really are.
He angles his head towards her again, narrowing his gaze as his lips twisted into a small smirk.  It felt like his technique had the ability to see right through her- she wondered if he was really strong enough to do that.
“Last time we spoke, you said you wouldn’t entertain this,” He reminds her.  “What’s changed?” 
“Nothing,” She murmurs back without a moment of hesitation.  
It’s the truth, and she has no reason to falsify an answer for him.  Just as he had no reason to be so forward about their past.  Even if she hadn’t gathered much, this conversation was much different from their last, and she felt as though she would walk away with this one overwhelmed by all of this new information.  Her trust in him is precarious, and could easily be destroyed by one wrong move, but right now, she can’t see what reason she has not to take him at his word.  It’s not as if he’s asking for anything in return, it’s not as if she won’t return to her dorm for the night and likely not see or speak to him again for some time.  So, she supposed, what was the harm in entertaining the idea just a little?
“Nothing at all” She finishes the thought softly, before turning her attention back to the forgotten movie still playing across the room.  It was nearing the end, and she’d missed enough of it to barely understand what was happening on screen now, but she didn’t have any more questions for the King of Curses tonight, and he kept quiet as she watched the movie.
To her surprise, Sukuna did sit and watch the movie.  She’s not sure how much of it he actually listened or paid attention to, but it was clear that he had not given Yuji his body back, and was still very much alert and in control.
(y/n) doesn’t return to her dorm room until she finally sees Yuji asleep next to her, his face bare of any markings, and the extra eyelids under his eyes closed just as peaceful as his own.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
In the meantime, (y/n) didn’t feel so anxious around Yuji anymore, which they were both grateful for.  Yuji wasn’t sure why the sudden chance came about, but he certainly wouldn’t complain.  He was just glad to have his friend acting her usual self again.
He had no idea of the few chats she’d shared with the curse he hosted.  While Sukuna wasn’t necessarily hiding his interest in her, he wasn’t forthright with the brat either.  He didn’t need the kid interfering with what he was building on here.  It was slow moving like a trail of molasses but Sukuna was more patient than most people gave him credit for.  He could let a lot of things go.
Not this, however.
All of Gojo’s students had been sent on a seemingly standard assignment.  Odd, unexplainable disappearances had been happening in a clearing in the middle of the woods, enough so to alert jujutsu society and send a few sorcerers to the scene to investigate.
Upon arrival, there was an undeniable heaviness in the air.  The field that the group of four found themselves in didn’t stretch for miles, but it was no small clearing.  It was a strange place for a curse to settle in and lure non-sorcerers towards.  Curses often tucked themselves into hidden spots, within abandoned buildings or deep in the thick brush of the woods.  Not a clearing of grass and wild daisies.
The entire situation was odd, it didn’t sit right in anyone’s mind as they went their separate ways to scour the area for any insight on what was happening here.  It didn’t take long for something to turn up.
A curse that had to have been a First Grade, with a large, sharp toothed grin and gouged out eyes, materialized in the clearing’s center, and as soon as it clocked this evening’s prey as jujutsu sorcerers, it seemed to go into a mad state.  (y/n’s) not sure if it possesses great speed or the ability to teleport when it’s suddenly before her.  All she’s able to do in that amount of time is lift her weapon into an offensive position, she’s not even given the time to drive it forward in an attack before suddenly, she’s no longer on the ground.
She comes to mid air, just before she hits the ground and rolls a few times before her senses kick in and her hands brace themselves against the ground.  She can faintly hear her friends calling for her in their shock, but it’s distant.  Her head is spinning too fast for her to lift it to see just how far the curse had thrown her.
A few coughs erupt from her throat before she even tells her body to do so, brought on by the hit to her chest once she’s lifted herself up enough to relieve the pressure from the ground.  Her arms are trembling from the adrenaline and a few drops of blood splatter from her mouth, but once she’s sat up enough, she drags the sleeve of her uniform over her mouth to dry the blood, and she finally gets a good look at where she is.
She’s been thrown clear out of the field, and she considers herself lucky that her body hadn’t been halted by a tree, and instead tumbled to the ground.  Being thrown directly into one of the large oaks she’s surrounded by could’ve been fatal if she’d hit it just right, or at the very least she could’ve broken her ankle.  With a rushed assessment she decides nothing feels broken, and therefore she can grab her weapon and- 
Her weapon is nowhere near her.  She scrambles to her feet, her breaths heavy and irregular as she searches around the grass, looking for the large blade she’d had in her hands less than a minute ago.  
It had only been a minute, right? She hadn’t blacked out, had she?
Realizing there was no use wasting her time looking for a weapon now, she pushes herself to break into a sprint back towards the clearing.  Her friends are blurry images moving about, trying to attack the larger blurry images that fends off their attacks with little struggle.  She concludes this when she begins to hear the yelps and grunts of her fellow sorcerers, and yet the curse doesn’t seem to struggle at all.
Just when her vision begins to clear and she’s preparing herself to rejoin the fight with only her cursed technique and her fists, she sees the curse grab Megumi by the leg, and soon after he’s getting thrown into the air just as she did.  His name is torn from her raw throat in an instant- but Megumi is more prepared to be airborne than she was, drawing his hands together to summon Nue to catch him.
Relief is short lived, and soon Megumi finds himself instructing Nue to catch Nobara and Yuji when shortly after, they’re being thrown as well.  Nue’s a quick shikigami, but it’s only strong enough to carry one person at a time before it’s energy starts to deplete, and the curse keeps at it’s movements, chuckling the three of them into the air before they can land an attack on them on their decline.  Yuji tries, using Black Flash on his descent in the hopes of striking it where it hurts, but the curse manages to catch him in a tight fist before chucking him again.
(y/n’s) still keeping an eye out for her weapon when she grows nearer to the fight, seeing as no one else’s techniques have caused any real damage yet, her cursed tool of a sword could be quite handy right about now.
She was hoping that with it’s attention focused on the other three, she could attack it from behind, and drive it more towards the clearing again.  With how much movement and tossing it had done, it had driven them all deeper into the woods, which made it harder to land attacks, but had been good coverage for (y/n) to sneak up in her approach.
To her disadvantage, she hadn’t expected there to be a pair of large eyes on the back of it’s head.  In the dark of the night she hadn’t noticed them until they’d opened and landed on her instantaneously.  It must’ve sensed her sneaking around behind it.
She’s quicker in her movements this time, dodging it’s large hand before it could grab onto her, but it outsmarts her and snatches her up in the other.  A yelp sounds from her when it squeezes harder than the last time, her air supply cut off just as she’d tried to take in a large breath, making her sputter and cough as it raised her in the air again.  A sense of dread and failure washes over her when she realizes it’s going to throw her again.  Whatever this curse’s deal was, it had a thing for throwing it’s victims around to torture them.
And torture it was- as this time when she’s launched into the air, it’s a clear throw over the trees.  It’s harder than before, and faster.  The cool air cuts over her face in sharp streams, bringing tears to her eyes before she could comprehend what would come of her fall.  She could brace herself, but as she gets a watery glance at what’s below, she knows that shielding her face would provide no comfort to her fall.
Just past the cluster of oak trees is a steep overhang.  Rock and the roots of old trees jutting out some thirty feet to the ground.  
This is why her fall felt so long.  A sharp gasp escapes her, and when her inhale gets caught in her throat, she wonders if this is the last breath she’ll ever take.
When she shuts her eyes to protect them from the harsh wind, a wetness spreads down her cheeks.  In a last ditch effort at self preservation, her arms brace over her face, and she buries herself into them, not wanting to see the last thing that would break her fall.  Hopefully she wouldn’t feel it, either.
Her jaw clenched tightly as her heart began to race faster, expecting the crash to come soon.
The sensation isn’t as expected.  There is no slam against stone or cold ground that knocks the wind out of her.  Instead something’s wrapped around her middle, and out of worry that the curse had grabbed her in order to throw her again, she withdraws her head from her arms in a jolt.
It’s not the curse that’s caught her mid-fall.
It’s Sukuna.
With one arm wrapped around her back and the other around her shoulders, his large hand braces the back of her head to keep her tucked close.  They’re still falling, but the sensation feels different like this.  It’s almost as if he’s carrying her to the ground, his posture as natural as it would be if he were standing there now.
Wide, watery eyes blink up at him in astonishment when she fully registers what was happening.
“You’re alright, I’ve got you, sweetheart” 
If it weren’t for the rawness in her throat, she might’ve scolded him for the pet name, but her voice was taken away from her as soon as she’d been heaved into the sky a second time.
She doesn’t even process the way she’s gripping onto him until he lands on the ground, holding her up just a moment longer before carefully setting her on her feet.  Her hands are holding onto the sleeves of Yuji’s uniform in fists so tight her knuckles are white, and her hands are trembling.
The others are nowhere in sight, or at least, she can’t see them right now.  Her mind is so shaken up she doesn’t actually look.  Her eyes don’t tear away from the stunning red of Sukuna’s once.  She doesn’t even blink- hence the continued downpour of tears.  From the wind and her acceptance of a brutal death, her emotions were slowly catching up to reality.
Her chest is heaving but there’s no relief in feeling like she’s caught her breath.  Her heart is pounding so hard that it makes her ribs ache, but that very well could be the bruising from her previous fall setting in.  Her mouth moves but it takes a few tries for any real words to come out, and when her voice does come back to her, she doesn’t say much.
“S- Sukuna-” 
He silences her before she could even try to say something else.  Prying her hands off of his arms and placing them at her sides, even though there’s still tremors in her muscles.
“I only have a minute,” He tells her, in a gravely serious tone that she’s never heard from him before.  She blinks her wide eyes, leftover tears getting stuck on her lashes.  “It’s been handled” 
He doesn’t say anything else, but he doesn’t get the chance to before his posture begins to weaken, followed by his eyelids twitching and the marks beginning to fade away.
Gasping, (y/n) surges forward, grabbing Yuji by the shoulders before he could stumble and fall.  His eyes roll and blink a few times before he feels in control of his body again.  Soon after his posture straightens, and then it’s Yuji who’s looking worriedly down at (y/n).
She’s close, very close.  Her hands are gripping onto his shoulders for dear life.  He can feel her panting against his chin as her worried eyes scan over his features.
Yuji’s disoriented, like maybe he’s just woken up from a dream, or maybe he’s just woken up inside of a dream, and he’s not exactly sure how to voice this concern.  She makes it harder on him when one of her hands leaves his shoulder in order to reach for his cheek.
It’s so affectionate, the way she reaches for his face and presses her palm against it, that Yuji finds his skin heating up and a blush appearing over his cheeks before he could will himself not to.  She’s never behaved this way with him before.  He could only recall casual touches that occurred during training, or maybe a brush of her fingers when she handed him something, but nothing as intentional as this.  
And she’s certainly never looked at him like that either.  He can’t place his finger on it, but it makes his stomach churn to meet her eyes.
“Uh, (y/n)?” He mumbles out her name, and he finds himself doing a quick sweep of her, assessing her for a major injury.  But she’s standing just fine, and he can’t see any blood.  This had to be a head injury, right? 
He asks himself that question once more then the pad of her thumb brushes under his eye.  She faintly traces the incision of the closed eyelid just below his eyelashes.  Yuji holds his breath, but he’s not sure who he’s doing it for.  (y/n), whose eyes are glossing over as she’s gazing at the wrong eyes, which remained closed, or Sukuna, who Yuji was sure she was trying to reach to now.
And then she leans even closer, and the breath he’d been holding is forced out of him from the closing distance between them.  Her hands remain where they are, on his shoulder with an iron grip and against his cheek with the gentleness of a butterfly landing there.
On instinct Yuji finds his eyes darting down to her lips, but he’s positive she’s not going to kiss him- right? She wouldn’t do such a thing on a whim, not like this, not now when they’ve barely completed their assignment.  Not to mention their friends aren’t too far away- where are Nobara and Megumi anyways? Yuji’s thoughts are racing as fast as his heart as he struggles to figure out what to do as she grows nearer.
Before he has to come up with a decision, (y/n) stops, and Yuji swallows the lump in his throat out of relief that she wasn’t leaning in to kiss him.  The ride home would have been so awkward.
“Thank you” She breathes out the words, her thumb stroking over the spot on his cheek one more time before she finally drops her hand, and she pulls away from Yuji completely.
He blinks at her in disbelief, waiting for his heartbeat to calm down, which it does the further she steps away.
“What happened?” He asks, louder than he means to, but when he finally collects his thoughts and processes what just happened, he can’t help but blurt out the question.
The pair begin to make their way back to the clearing, both realizing that the First Grade curse was gone, clearly exorcized with the amount of purple goo coating the surrounding plants and trees.  They don’t discuss it right away, but they both have an inkling on how it was taken care of.
“Sukuna saved my life” 
Yuji wants to ask more questions, but when he turns towards her to do so, he can tell that she’s not ready to talk about it.  Her features had hardened, and she didn’t meet his eyes as they walked.
He knows he’s put off this conversation one too many times already… but once again he finds himself biting his tongue as they catch up with their other friends.
Something tells him that he’ll have to bring it up soon, though.  Because the King of Curses wouldn’t save just anyone’s life twice- much less a sorcerer.  And he has a gut feeling that (y/n) knows more than she’s letting on.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
This time, it’s only a few days since the last assignment when (y/n) crosses paths with Sukuna again.  Well, this time around, he came to her.
She’s just slid her bookmark between the pages she’d decided to pause on tonight when there’s a knock at her door.  With a quiet huff- she was just about to go to sleep after all- but before she can call for her visitor to come in, the door slides open and he’s inviting himself right on.
“Yu-! Sukuna?” 
The initial scolding tone she takes drops as soon as she realizes he’s not who she thought.  Her voice softens around his name in a way that it shouldn’t, but that she can’t help.  She sits up a little further in her bed, brows furrowing as he slides the door shut behind him.
“You can’t just walk in here” 
“I knocked” 
“Okay well… well you have to wait for me to actually invite you in” She mumbles out, only to be met with a scoff and a humorless chuckle.  But when her frown deepens, he sighs.
“Fine, I’ll knock for longer next time” He grunts, before he begins to wander around her room.  He glances over the few things littered on her desk- a picture frame of her and her friends, an open and neglected textbook, a pair of bracelets she’d forgotten to put away- he almost forgets why he’d come in to begin with.
“Um… did you need something?” (y/n) asks after a minute of him wandering around and eyeing all of her things.
“You’re freaking out the brat,” Sukuna says casually, picking up a little porcelain cat on her shelf.  His eyes narrow as he turns the small thing around in his hands, as if trying to decipher it’s purpose.  “He won’t stop asking about you now” 
“What?” (y/n) pushes the covers off her lap, moving to the end of the bed to sit a little closer to him.  It doesn’t matter if she’s quiet, it’s only the two of them in the room, but she feels a sudden need to lower her voice anyways.  “What do you mean he’s freaking out?” 
He turns to her then, the figurine still in his hands.  The tiniest of smiles purses on her lips at how silly a tiny cat looks in his large and tattooed hands.  Despite how easily he could crush it to dust, his hold on it is gentle.
“I just thought that you should be aware, you know, that eventually you’ll have to decide if you want to explain yourself to your friends or not” 
Her stomach twists and turns into dozens of little knots.  The King of Curses was stopping by her room late into the night just for this? She shouldn’t be surprised, because she knew his motives, but still, she blinked at him with wide eyes.
“You haven’t…?” The question trails off as she shakes her head at him, unsure of how to word it just right.
“I don’t like the idea of the brat knowing all of my business,” Sukuna hums, finally setting the cat back down on her shelf.  “You’ve always had a knack for collecting useless things” He comments, and the words are harsh but his tone is nothing but amused.
“So… you think I should talk to Yuji?” She asks, and Sukuna lets his shoulders rise and fall in disinterest.
“If that’s what you want” He says, but it doesn’t feel considerate.  (y/n) frowns.
“Don’t you think he’ll be… upset?” 
“With you?” 
She nods.
“You’ve done nothing wrong.  If anything, the brat would only worry about you.  Seeing as he despises me, and all” 
“You don’t exactly make it easy to feel otherwise” (y/n) mumbles, and her words hang in the air for a few long moments.  She’s not sure if she means the insinuation behind them or if it’s just a coincidence, but she doesn’t try to backtrack to explain herself.
“Yes, well, he certainly cares more for you than he does for me.  Too much so.  Some boundaries might do you some good, you know” 
“Boundaries?”
“Yes, boundaries.  He almost kissed you” 
Her eyes nearly bulge out of her head before her brows furrow and she scoffs in disbelief.
“What? What are you even talking about?” 
Sukuna tucks his hands into his pockets, looking all the more out of place in her room at this hour.
“During your little gratitude session on your last assignment,” He says, his lips curling into a deep frown.  “You got a bit too close and his brat-mind went a bit haywire.  You don’t need to be so affectionate with him, you know.  A plain thank you would have sufficed-” 
“I wasn’t being affectionate with him,” She snaps back, and Sukuna raises a brow at the display.  “I was thanking you, asshole.  You pretty much saved my life?” She says it like she’s trying to jog his memory.  “I wasn’t trying to make a move on Yuji, and I’m sure he knew that too.  I don’t control his thoughts, he can think whatever he wants, doesn’t mean it’s happening” 
Sukuna steps closer to where she sat before bending down to match her height.  She’s still frowning, clearly annoyed with this interaction, but she had yet to ask him to leave, and he has a feeling she won’t.
“So if the brat had plucked up the nerve to make a move, you would’ve pushed him away?” He asks, and he’s smirking, almost as if he wants her to say otherwise.  Her eyes narrow, not understanding what his mind games were getting at this time.
“Politely, yes,” She answers, shaking her head at him.  “Why does this matter? Last I checked, in this lifetime, I’m not some cowering wife for you to boss around” 
Sukuna laughs at that, genuinely laughs.  He stands back up to his full height and throws his head back and cackles so loud that (y/n) can only pray Nobara doesn’t wake up from next door.  She might not need to whisper to speak with him, but the walls weren’t exactly soundproof either.
“Sweetheart, you’ve never been a cowering wife,” He tells her once his laughter died down.  “A wife, perhaps, but never some submissive weak minded mortal” He adds.
“So we have been married?” 
She asks him with such peculiarity, and it makes him chuckle again.  She sounds as though this has been the strangest thing he’s revealed thus far, and he can’t help but find humor in it.
“We have” He answers.
(y/n) shifts her position, pulling her legs towards her chest and staring up at him expectantly, waiting for a continuation that wouldn’t come.  Sukuna merely stares at her with mild confusion.
“Well?” She asks, tilting her head forward.  “Did we get married every time?” 
He smirks.
“I’ve told you that you created a Binding Vow in order to be with me across centuries of eras.  In the grand scheme of things, don’t you think marriage is a little… bleak?” 
(y/n) shrugs a shoulder, resting her arms atop her knees as she gazes back at him curiously.
“It’s bleak in this lifetime,” She murmurs back.  “Not to me, at least” 
Sukuna hums, before shaking his head.
“You never change” 
“Do I really?” She presses again.  “For the last… thousand years… am I really the same?” 
Sukuna ponders for a moment.  This was a common question of hers, and each time, he struggled to answer it.
“You really want to know?” 
She doesn’t say anything, but she pats her hand against the space on the bed next to her.  Sukuna’s gaze shifts to it momentarily, before looking back at her.  After a moment, he takes a seat.
“You are almost completely the same in every lifetime I’ve found you in,” He explains.  “You’re always stubborn, you never make it easy.  But you always… come around,” He turns to her.  “Like now” 
“You think I’m coming around?” She asks, a skeptical look in her eye that makes him smirk.  He leans forward as though the next part he shares is a grave secret.
“You never want to admit it, but you always have a soft spot for me” 
(y/n) raises a brow back at him in defiance.
“I think you’ve got that turned around,” She murmurs.  “I think the King of Curses has a soft spot for me.  And I think he’s making it everyone’s problem” 
He chuckles quietly, his gaze sweeping over the gentle features of her face.
“I think the feelings you have for me in every beginning come from your soul’s memory,” He tells her, raising a hand, and gently pressing the pad of his thumb against the center of her forehead.  The sudden touch makes her freeze at first, but eventually she relaxes as the rest of his fingers lay in her hair.  “I haven’t quite figured it out yet, I don’t know how it is that you’re never able to keep your memories,” He tilts his head as he ponders it for a moment, his eyes focused on where he’s touched her head.  “But I think deep down, you know that you trust me” 
(y/n) doesn’t have a witty comeback for that one.  She’s still reeling from the warmth of his touch, and the weight of his words.  But she feels obligated to say something when his gaze met hers again.
“I never said I believed you in all this, you know” She whispers weakly.
“You don’t believe me?” He murmurs back at her, his voice a low rumble as his hand starts to fall from her head.  He doesn’t remove his touch, he lets the back of his finger trace along her temple, before slowly moving down her jaw.  Sukuna doesn’t seem displeased in her words.  If anything, he seems intrigued by them.  “You know, you almost look the same in every life, too” 
“I do?” She asks, just as his fingers fall still against her cheek.
Sukuna hums, and nods his head.
“The last I saw you, your hair was different,” He tells her.  “It was longer, to about… here,” With his free hand, he gently touches her waist, and the way she tenses doesn’t go unnoticed.  “You would wear it in all sorts of different styles.  Pretty braids and… whatever our servants would desire to do that day,” Her eyes widen at his use of the word servants, but Sukuna glides over it.  “But that was a few hundred years ago, of course.  It would all be outdated now,” He drops his hand from her waist, but the other remains against her cheek, his touch ghosting over it.  “Not that it wouldn’t still be exquisite” 
Her eyes shift between his, trying to decipher the emotion they hold.  She can’t tell if he’s amused or sorrowful.  Was he disappointed that she couldn’t remember?
“This is why I’m the one who doesn’t believe you” He murmurs after a few beats pass.
(y/n’s) brows draw together just slightly, just enough to pinch the skin between them.
“What do you mean?” She asks, her voice betraying her as it shakes just a little.
“Because you look at me like that” He says, nodding at her slightly.
(y/n) blinks, doe eyes resembling the glass of the porcelain cat he’d just been mocking.  Her lips are parted, formed in the smallest of pouts as she gazes up at him, that look unrelenting.
She tilts forward, her gaze flickering over his face leisurely, mapping out the black markings, and all the small details that make him so different from Yuji.  The way he insists on pushing the bangs out of his face, the broader jaw, the sharper canine that she only notices when he laughs or smiles- which is quite rare.  She’s admiring him so openly that Sukuna’s not sure what to do under such heavy surveillance, so he just sits there and allows her to stare.
But eventually, she sighs, and drops her legs from her chest before she crawls across her bed, moving to get under the covers again.  Sukuna remains in his spot at the end, watching her without an expression as she settles into her pillow.
“Does it disturb Yuji’s rest when you take over like this?” She asks quietly as she presses her cheek into the soft comfort of her pillow.
No, the brat’s completely dozed off, that’s why he could take over like this.  It’s what he wants to say, but he doesn’t.
“I’ll be sure it doesn’t” He says as he stands, and walks around the bed, facing the side she’s just moved to.  He crouches down to meet her eye level again, and (y/n) moves a little closer to the edge towards him.
“Okay, good,” She whispers.
She blames her exhaustion when she reaches out to him, the tips of her fingers barely prodding at the dark ink that follows the sharp curve of his jaw.  Her eyes follow it as she traces it down to his chin, almost painfully slow.  It takes every ounce of restraint for him not to lean into the touch.
“I don’t know what you expect me to do, Sukuna,” She murmurs, her fingers lingering on his chin, her eyes slowly meeting his.  “I… I can’t…” 
She can’t even say the words.  She hardly wants to be thinking about them.  But Sukuna knows her better than anyone who’s ever walked this earth, and he nods back at her in understanding before she could try to finish the thought.
“I’ve never expected anything of you,” He murmurs, before reaching up to pull her hand from his face, gently closing his fingers around her own as he moves it away.  “You have been the greatest love of my life whether you’re able to remember or not,” He tells her, and she listens to him with her full attention.  “And whether you believe me or not, you still will be,”
There’s the smallest of squeezes to her hand with his words, and a lump begins to build up in her throat.
“You can ask more questions another time, alright? You should get some sleep, sweetheart” 
She gives him a faint nod, her eyes already feeling too heavy to keep open when she feels her blanket being dragged over her shoulders.  Distantly, her mind registers that the King of Curses is tucking her into bed, but she’s too tired now to comment on it.
There’s another squeeze to her fingers, followed by a hesitation, and then the soft, unmistakable pair to two lips pressing against her knuckles.  It’s not a lingering kiss, and it’s featherlight, over as soon as it began, and again, (y/n) keeps her eyes shut and doesn’t say anything.
Sukuna lays her hand down against her blanket with the gentleness of maneuvering a newborn.  She hears him walking away towards her door.
“Goodnight, Sukuna” 
It’s the softest call, but it’s enough to make him pause at the door and glance back at her.  She still can’t look at him- she’s afraid she’ll burst into tears if she does, although she can’t quite explain the heavy emotion that’s bringing the tears to her eyes to begin with.
“Goodnight, my love” 
It’s murmured so quickly before he’s hastily exiting her room that she could’ve missed it altogether, but she doesn’t.  Her hand curls into her sheets as she pulls it close to her chest as she lets tonight’s conversation sink into her mind.
The truth was, she did trust him.  She did believe him.  And she was pretty sure this was the case for the entire time she’s known him.  She’s pretty sure this was unavoidable.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
Everything’s blurry when she first comes to.
And everything hurts.
She tries to move, but it only results in a strangled whine being pulled from her throat as soon as she tries.
She’s on the ground.  It’s covered in rubble.  There’s glass pricking her arms- or maybe the gravel was just that sharp.  There’s a warmth pooling under the side she’s laying on.  Likely blood.
Another groan when she at least tries to get on her back in order to assess the bleeding wound on her left side, but just as she’s about to roll her body weight, she catches something in her vision.
Yuji?
He’s slumped over against a wall, and he looks no better than she feels.  Covered in bruises and blood that may or may not be his own- whatever went down was ugly.
She blinks a few times to focus her vision a little better.  She tries to call for him but her throat is raw and all that comes out is another whine.  Either way, he’s clearly passed out and wouldn’t have responded.  The fight must’ve taken everything out of him.
Oh, the fight, it slowly starts coming back to her in flashing images.  That Blood Manipulation Guy.  He was rough.  She’s not sure how they got out of it alive- she’s not sure how they got to this point at all.  Her mind’s still foggy and the only thing that’s easy to focus on is the shooting pains in her body.
That is, until there’s the sound of clicking heels and hushed, feminine voices.  (y/n) hadn’t even realized her eyes had slipped shut again until those two appeared, and she peeks her eyes open to see two girls whispering between themselves as they crouch before Yuji’s body.
They look harmless enough, no older than her, and not to mention they look anxious.  So nothing about her blurry assumptions about them triggered any warning flags.
That was, until they pulled out a bag of fingers.  Unmistakable fingers.
She needs to get up now and she knows it.  She pleads with her body to move, wishing the throbbing hot pain in her left leg would disappear just long enough for her to get to Yuji, to stop these girls from what they’re about to do.
It’s unclear how much time lapses before she notices a third figure at Yuji’s body.  A curse.  And he seems to have a few fingers of his own, too.
No, her voice cries, but it’s only in her head.  You can’t do that.
She’s never felt so weak, her fingers barely twitching against the concrete when she’s trying to tell her body to get up.  She’s sure that means none of the rest of her limbs are moving.  She’s trapped there.
Her heart is pounding, her breaths are labored, dread consumes her so completely she’d throw up if there was anything left in her stomach.
It’s tough to count just how many fingers are shoved down Yuji’s throat before the curse is clamping his large hand over his mouth and forcing his head back in order to make the unconscious boy swallow every last one.  With tears in her eyes she knows it’s more than what’s safe, and there’s a turmoil in her gut as she doesn’t know how to feel about what comes next.
With her heart pounding in her ears she can’t tell what exactly the fighting amongst the curse users and the curse himself was about, but suddenly only the cycloptic curse remains standing over Yuji’s body.  He’s grunting and growling, still pushing the boy’s head back.  (y/n) wonders if he’s swallowed all those fingers by now.
These three were idiots.  But they were idiots stronger than her, and even if she’d had the strength to stop them, it would’ve been futile.
However, now, they hardly made her list of things to be afraid of in Shibuya.
The blood that’s pooled under Yuji’s body startles her- when did that get there? But after blinking a few times to clear her sight and focus just a fraction of a bit better, she realizes it’s not human blood at all, but that awful purple essence that leaves a stench behind.
“I’ll give you one second,” Comes the familiar voice that doesn’t belong to the body it erupts from.  “Move” 
In a flash, the small crowd around him is a good ten feet back.  (y/n) could almost laugh if her throat wasn’t bloodied raw.  They chose to wake him up with all those fingers, and now they’re visibly afraid of what they summoned themselves? They truly had no idea what they were in for now.
It only takes one glance towards her before Sukuna’s suddenly before her beaten form, crouching down to assess the damages.
“Now, which one of these insolent freaks did this to you?” He asks, tilting his head as his Reverse Cursed Technique took effect over her wounds with haste.  “I’ll start there” 
“N-none of them,” She stammers out, even though it’s the truth.
For the first time, she considers that she should be afraid of Sukuna.  The other three are still trembling even from their distance, barely letting themselves breathe in his presence.
All she’s ever felt towards Sukuna is irritation, perhaps mild vexation, but mostly he just confused her.  But now, she can feel the abundant amount of cursed energy wafting off of him, and despite his history in sparing her life and taking an interest in her, she briefly wonders if this is the moment he changes his mind.
The thought passes in a matter of seconds, when a pair of hands are gently aiding her in sitting upright.  Even with his technique healing her wounds, there are still aches and pains that make her wince.  Shards of glass falling from her skin as the healing tissue forces them out, bruises that still sting when she moves too quickly before their nasty colors disappear completely.
And Sukuna regards her with an expression she’s never seen before, but it makes her heart lurch in her chest.  It’s concern.  His brows are knotted, and his eyes are scanning over her repeatedly to make sure no injury was left on her body.  This was followed by sizable hands mapping over her carefully just to double check.
She should be afraid, but she’s not.  
In fact, as soon as those vermillion eyes return to hers, all she can feel is relief.
And she doesn’t think twice before she’s darting forward on achy knees, her arms wrapping around his neck and the rest of her body colliding into his so harsh it knocks the wind out of her for a moment, but she doesn’t mind panting to catch her breath again.  She embraces Sukuna as tightly as she can, as though he’s the only savior she’s ever known, an angel painted in pure white rather than the corrupted being he truly was.
Sukuna has half a mind to grab her by the neck and remove her from him with a snarl about how her injuries were still healing, but instead he wraps an arm around her, his hand smoothing over the tattered back of her uniform.
She could only imagine what the three at the end of the corridor were thinking, watching the King of Curses embrace such a weak sorcerer.
“You understand now, don’t you sweetheart?” He asks her quietly, and she manages a small nod against his chest, before her hands tighten into fists at the red hood that lies between his shoulder blades.  “It’s been a rough night, hasn’t it?” He muses, and when (y/n) doesn’t give him a response this time, he uses his free hand to pry her face away from his shirt, hooking her chin under his finger so that she’d meet his eyes.
Rough night didn’t even begin to cover what she’d been put through, what was she supposed to say? 
“It’s alright now, my love, I’m here,” 
Those words from him shouldn’t bring her the amount of comfort that they do.  The tears in her eyes begin to drip down her cheeks.  Sukuna’s smiling as he brushes them away, and despite her better judgment, she leans into the touch, seeking out even more comfort.  He chuckles at the sight, but humors her as he cups the side of her face in his palm, cradling her head with the gentleness of holding a flower by it’s petals.
She won’t admit it, not now anyways, but she knows deep down that there is no force on this earth greater than the swell of love in her chest right now.  It’s something she’s not sure should ever be voiced, but she has a feeling that Sukuna will find a way to draw it out of her anyways.  Just as he’s made her trust him, just as he’s made her confide in him, he’s bound to find a way into drawing the confession out of her as well.
Perhaps it’s her own fault, too.  Hiding the way a part of her believed everything he’s ever said to her, hiding the way it made her feel to know that she was so loved by a force so strong and unstoppable that he’d scour the earth after every lifetime in order to find her again.
I think the feelings you have for me in every beginning come from your soul’s memory, he’d said.  But I think deep down, you know that you trust me.
She stares at him now knowing all of this to be true, and Sukuna can almost see every thought in her dilated eyes, swallowed nearly whole by dark pupils as she clings to him now.
With a brush of his lips to the crown of her head, he makes her a promise that she’ll live through this horrid night yet.
She still holds onto him when he stands, and he lifts her up with ease, cradling her to his chest like she was merely a small and frightened child.  The only unease she felt now was knowing what fates were in store for the three at the end of the hall, who Sukuna had set his sights on first.
“Now, let’s take this one on together, sweetheart, shall we?” 
Her own fate was still unknown to her, but sealed in place long ago.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
[ cause i love to love to love to love you // i hate to hate to hate to hate you ]
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
xoxo ~ jordie
a/n: thinkin about writing a snippet of their past live(s) or something. i wanted to add something like that to this fic but i wanted the reader to feel unsure if they really could trust him soooo it went a diff route. idk don't hold me to it. i'm just a girl.
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hyunsvngs · 2 months
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𝐬𝐮𝐠𝐚𝐫 - vampire!changbin x human!reader
wc: 3.2k
cw: vampire!changbin, human!reader, they r in love ur honour, 18+ smut MINORS DNI!!
synopsis: changbin may be a vampire with supernatural strength, but there's nothing he loves more than to let you take control.
a/n: based off of this post and this ask :3 ENJOY.... please heed the smut warnings tho!!
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
sw: blowjobs, blood kink, petnames, mommy kink, dom!reader, sub!bin, maybe slight strength kink?, MUZZLE KINK!, dirty talk, riding, unprotected sex, creampie
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
you can’t believe you’ve got a man this delicious. a man so pliant and malleable too despite his otherworldly, supernatural status. changbin would never use his vampiric strength on you, no - he’d much rather lay down on the bed and let you do what you want to him. 
you’d begged him to turn you when you fell in love. to be able to use your strength on him, you said, trying to convince him. he’d only retorted with a quick “i let you do what you want anyway, sugar?” and well… he wasn’t wrong.
he invited you into his home quicker than any man ever had. he sweetened you up, took you on traditional dates where he turned up at your door with a bouquet of blood red roses, and even sweet talked your mother enough that she approved of him and let you stay at his house. she didn’t know he was over a hundred years old with two pointed teeth, obviously, but what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.
the seo estate is magnificent. the gardens are surrounded by an impenetrable stone wall, looking to be as fresh as the day it was built, and changbin has multiple bedrooms to himself. you’d gotten a bit upset - “binnie, doesn’t it get lonely here?” you said, bottom lip quivering, but he’d only slung one muscled arm around you. “i have you now, gorgeous.”
that was another thing about your man - he’s reassuring, and you always feel safe around him. you know that if you prodded at him a little more and begged him hard enough that he would truly change you and turn you into one of his own, if not purely because he cannot see spending his life with anyone else. 
he lays beneath you now, and you’re lost in your own thought with how much love you can have for someone who would be known as a creature of the night. his tummy quivers with an exhale, and you realise your fingernails have been digging into his pecs through the black silk shirt he’s wearing. he shifts beneath you, slacks tight with his erection, and you grin at his reaction.
“you like the pain, binnie?” you muse, digging your fingernails in just a bit harder. changbin whimpers, eyes fluttering shut, and you see his fangs poke out and dig into his plush doll-like bottom lip. not hard enough to draw blood, no, but just enough to the point you know he’s enjoying it. you grind your hips down and his hands fist in the black sheets on his bed. 
the candlelight flickers around you as you adjust yourself, your nightgown spilling off one shoulder and exposing your shoulder to him. when you grind down again, his eyes flutter open, pupils dilated. “i want you to tell me what you want, changbin.”
his eyes flicker to your shoulder, and you giggle when they slowly crawl up to your neck. changbin hums, fingers twitching as if they want to grab you, but he won’t. he’s a good boy. 
“i want-“ he huffs, one of his shorter, human teeth biting at his lip. “i want you. i want to- i want you to ride me, sugar, and will you let me- will you let me drink from you again? god, your blood is the sweetest thing i’ve ever had.”
“mm, maybe,” you respond, but you know you’ll let him. you just need him to beg a little bit more, sweeten you up a bit. “i’ll ride you, binnie. will you let me have your cock in my mouth first?”
“god, really?” changbin groans, eyes flickering in excitement, and you nod. your hand runs down his tummy, past the shirt and to the zipper of his slacks. it bulges out with how hard he is, and you use your fingernail to push it down, the slow noises of the unzipping filling the room.
you’re sure changbin’s going to scream if you don’t hurry up, so you’re quick to lift your hips up and pull his trousers and boxers down muscled thighs together. his cock is hard, unbearably so, slapping against his stomach and leaking against the fabric of his expensive shirt. the head leaks beneath his foreskin steadily. you want it in your mouth, but you have to make him work for it first - you wrap your hand around the base, lifting his cock off of his tummy, and then you’re stripping his cock at a rapid pace. 
“oh! oh, ah- ah,” he’s wincing, and you know it’s dry, but you can’t help but hurt your boy sometimes. tears bloom in his eyes and you can see that it truly must take his superhuman strength to stop his hips from fucking up into your fist, his hands almost tearing his sheets clean off of the bed. “gorgeous, sugar, your mouth- your mouth, please! please, fuck, i-“
changbin cuts himself off with a sharp keen when you flick your fingernail over his nipple, through his shirt. “what do you call me, binnie?”
he must be stupid with it already because he blinks at you, a tear falling down one soft cheek. he stammers a few noises out, your hand still ravaging his cock, and then it hits him. “mommy! ah, mama, mama! mommy, please, please, give binnie your mouth.”
“there you go, good boy,” you coo, hand moving from his chest to his hair. you pet just above his ear, and he leans into your touch, humming happily. you don’t comment when he turns his mouth to your palm, nipping just slightly with his teeth, but you do reward him with a soft smack to his face. “stay still. no biting, bunny.”
he whimpers when you finally begin your descent down his body. you kiss him through his shirt, and then you finally push the material up to his waist to see him in his entirety. you’ve still got a tight grip on him, and he stands prominent in your fist, his leaky tip just barely peeking out. your tongue darts to dip into his piss slit, and he really does rip the sheets a little this time, along with a strangled noise coming from his lungs.
it’s easy to deepthroat changbin’s cock. his girth is so delicious that it stretches your jaw a little, but you’re able to get his length to your throat with no issues whatsoever. you do so, engulfing his cock into your mouth, and when you start bobbing your head he’s done for. he wails with it, little murmurs of your name falling from his lips, and when you let your eyes flicker up to him he’s really crying.
“mama! oh, oh, my- binnie’s cock feels so good, mama, it’s- hnnng, oh!” he’s babbling as if he can’t believe it, as if you haven’t done this a million times, and you move your hand to his sac. his balls are heavy, full and swollen with his pending release, and you massage them with your thumb until he positively can’t control the bucking of his hips. you let him fuck your throat once, twice, and then you slap his balls hard. “sorry! sorry, mommy, binnie’s sorry.”
you let his cock slide out of your mouth, and it lands with a wet slap against the thatch of curly, pitch black hair at his base. “i said to stay still, bunny,” and your voice is hoarse, but he nods, chin quivering.
“‘m sorry,” he mumbles, and you can see how his cock jumps with his nervousness. “will you- will you still let binnie drink? and ride me, and-?”
“and what, baby? cum inside me?” you tilt your head to the side in question, and you swear you see changbin blush. he nods, bottom lip jutting out, and you can’t help your laugh. “we’ll see. be a good boy for me, okay?”
he wasn’t expecting you to move up his body again, but he’s pleasantly surprised when you pull your nightgown up. the white satin remains on your body, just barely held up by the curve of your hips, and you hold his cock upright. you’re soaking wet between your legs, and changbin moans out when you run his length through the folds of your pussy, just barely catching on the swollen bud of your clit.
“binnie,” you say, breathless. “binnie, tell me how much you want it.”
he’s instant with his response. “so bad! so bad, sugar, feel how hard i am? binnie’s that hard just for you, will you let me have it?”
“just for me, mm?” you ask, and he nods. you lift up just a tad, holding the hem of your nightgown up, and then you’re sinking down onto his cock in one go. his girth stretches your hole beyond belief, even with the added thickness. when he bottoms out, your toes curl, his cockhead resting in that one gummy place inside you that he’s taught you to love. “ah, there we go. that’s good, yeah?”
“s-so good, mama,” his voice is choked, and he lets his eyes flutter shut again. “so good. tight pussy, ‘s so good.”
“it’s all yours, baby,” you moan, and he nods frantically. you’re quick to start moving your hips, too horny to keep the facade going, and changbin’s hands move to grab the pillow either side of his head. your ass slaps against the tops of his thighs, wet noises ringing throughout the entirety of the stone-built room - and probably further out in the estate, but you can’t fathom the concept of changbin’s groundskeepers hearing anything. at a particularly well-angled bounce of your hips, his cockhead rams deliciously into your g-spot, and you know you’ve cracked it, continuing your grinds in that exact position. 
“is it good?” changbin asks, breathless, and he finally opens his eyes. his eyes land on your tits, bouncing in your nightgown, and he shuts them again as if he’s been branded with a silver cross. “sugar. i can’t even look at you, i’ll bust.”
you giggle, leaning forward to grip onto him for purchase. your hands land on his pecs again and you whine when your clit grinds against his pubic bone, fast and feverish, and you don’t reprimand him when his hands finally move down to your ass. he’s held back for so long, and you both know that it’s only so long that he can take not being able to touch you.
“ah, that’s so- fuck, binnie,” you moan, teeth digging into your bottom lip. you’re reminded of your previous plans when his fingernails scratch at your ass, his back arched like a cat. “mm, binnie? y’wanna taste mommy?”
in any other situation with any other man that would have completely different connotations, but changbin knows what it means. he shoots up into a seated position, eyes half lidded, and his head darts to the juncture between your neck and your shoulder.
“c-can i, mommy?” he questions, moaning when your hips grind down on him harder. “can i, please?”
“more, binnie,” you respond, and he knows what you mean. his tongue laves over your neck, and then he places a wet, open-mouthed kiss over the column of your throat. that’s where he’s going to bite you, and he’s tenderizing you like something he’s going to eat. you suppose you are.
“mama,” he whines, long and drawn out. “let me taste you. please, god, i’m thirsty, mama. let me, please?”
you sigh with your pleasure, and you finally halt your hips, stopping the boy underneath you from being jostled too much. his hands knead at your asscheeks while you pretend to deliberate.
“alright, honey,” you coo, voice soft. “you can bite.”
changbin’s fangs protrude from his mouth, and then he’s biting you. it’s slow, the way his teeth begin to bury themselves into your skin, and the moan he lets out is high pitched. changbin’s always messy when you let him do this, and despite the fact he starts to drink your blood instantly upon it hitting his tastebuds, it’s already started to drip down your shoulder. 
you pick the right time to start moving your hips again. he’s sighing and moaning as he drinks, and you begin a slow grind on top of him. changbin’s cock positively throbs inside of you, and you clench down approvingly, making him grip you just a bit tighter. 
he drinks and drinks until you’re lightheaded with it. when he pulls away, you’re a little dizzy, but not enough so that you can’t take in the sight of him. his chin and lips are covered in bright red blood, and it’s dripped down to your white nightgown and stained the fabric a dangerous colour. changbin moans in approval when he sees it, and his mouth goes to your nightgown to try and lick the excess up messily. fortunately for you, he licks over the pebbled peak of your nipple, and he’s fixated on it as soon as he catches it. 
the nightgown becomes drenched with not only your blood, but his spit too. he doesn’t let up, swirling his tongue around your nipple through the fabric, and you’re left to run your fingernails through his hair teasingly. he whines against you when you pull his hair back to your neck, before he’s quiet, lapping at the two pin prick holes in your skin soothingly. something about his venom over the wounds feels euphoric, and you can’t help yourself when you push him back down onto his back to ride him hard.
he looks debauched. his eyes blaze a crimson shade with his feed, and your blood is smeared all over the bottom of his face - streaks adorn his sharp chin and his fangs look like they’ve been dipped in it. he licks over his upper lip with a grin, and you can’t help but to smile back before you’re bouncing.
“fuck yeah! yeah, mama, yeah, ride me,” he murmurs, eyes flickering over your body like he can’t believe you exist. you can’t believe he exists, but you know you must look the picture of his wet dreams in your nightgown. the fabric over your breast is so drenched it’s see through, and your blood still drips a little bit from your neck. in the middle of grinding on his chubby cock, you let your thumb collect some of the red liquid on your thumb, and you press it into his mouth.
changbin whines. his hands move to your waist and he sucks your thumb like he would your strap, moaning around it like it’s the best thing he’s ever had past his plushy lips. you fuck the digit in and out in rhythm with your pace on top of him, and his cock leaks inside you so warm you feel it, flooding your gummy walls and leaving you breathless. 
with a strong grind on his cock, changbin’s fangs nip at your thumb, and you have to pull your thumb away for another little love tap on his cheek. his eyes roll back into his head, and you giggle. an idea hits you, and you know you just have to do it.
your hips halt, and you grab changbin’s curls tight, pulling his head back. “i think we better get your muzzle, bunny.”
“no! no, you let me drink, what- why?! why, why?” he wails, but you know he enjoys it. he just likes kicking up a little fuss when you get mean like this, and you ignore him to reach into the bedside table to grab the offending item. it’s only small, covering the bottom half of his face with black leather and miniature metal bars over his mouth, but changbin cums his fucking brains out every time you equip it over his gorgeous face. he’s still babbling when you loop it over his curls, pulling the strap tight and letting your pussy clench down at the sight of him so submissive, so pliant. 
“mm, that’s it. stay there like that, that’s it,” and you lean back, hands gripping his thighs. you’re feeling a little lenient, so you let changbin push your nightgown up with calloused palms and watch the space where his cock enters you over and over. he’s going to cum soon, you realise, and you’re going to have to make the most of the time you have right now. changbin snaps his fangs at you as if he’s a puppy about to bite, and you clench down on him with a sharp keen, pussy gushing down to his pubic hair. 
you reach around yourself with one hand, fingers rubbing messily over your clit, and it makes your pussy tingle deliciously. changbin’s still making strangled noises, legs thrashing behind you, and you can hear him mumbling quietly.
“please, please… let me drink again, sugar? mommy. mama, please, please-”
his hips cant upwards and you jolt. your pin prick wounds on your neck are healed from the after effects of changbin’s vampire venom, but you flick your fingernail over it, causing the wound to start oozing crimson essence again. changbin’s nose scrunches up beneath the muzzle as he inhales, and you wipe your hand over your bloody skin before you’re just barely letting your fingertips slide through the metal bars on his restraints.
“s-smell it, changbinnie,” you coo, chest heaving with a flush as you get closer to your orgasm. your hand speeds up on your clit when he nips softly at your fingers, and when he cants his hips up again he’s flooding you with hot cum. his own chest heaves as he cums, cock throbbing inside of you, and you whine. 
“fuck. fuck, sorry-”
“stay fucking still, bunny,” you groan. “you better not go soft on me. make mama cum, c’mon.”
and he does. he wraps his muscled arms around you, the material of his shirt scratching against your nightgown, and then he’s thrusting into you. it’s awkward, and he’s only half hard, but the show of strength is the only thing you need to push you over the edge. you shake and gush through your orgasm, arms moving to wrap around changbin’s neck, and you feel his chest rumble with a groan as he feels you throb around him. 
when you flop off of him, pussy messy and swollen with your sex, he stretches with a loud groan. you huff in response, and he sniffs. the unspoken communication makes him let out that loud, affectionate laugh that you love.
changbin’s out of breath next to you, limbs akimbo, and you giggle at his soft cock resting against his pubic bone. you pull the straps of his muzzle loose and let it drop onto the pillow, and changbin grins at you.
“the muzzle was such a good idea,” he says, elated, and you let him push himself into your space and lay his head on your chest. your nightgown is still covered in blood and his spit, but he doesn’t care, making little happy noises against you. “i love you, yeobo.”
you can’t help but smile, sated. “i love you too, changbinnie.”
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villainousauthor · 2 months
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Hero continues to rock the wailing infant, trying to shush her. It's been hours, and still they haven't been able to get her to calm down. Nothing has worked, not a bottle, a diaper change, nothing.
Hero places their hand against her small forehead, checking for a fever, maybe. They feel so beyond their depth right now. Hero's barely slept the past day, and they're dead on their feet, eyes barely staying open.
"I wish you could just tell me what's wrong. This is so frustrating." Hero whines, still bouncing the crying infant.
"It's unfortunate, most babies can't talk." The familiar voice comes from behind, and Hero whirls around defensively to see Villain standing in the doorway of the nursery.
"What are you doing here?" Hero demands, clutching their child closer.
"You haven't come to fight me in months. I've sent out clear messages-"
"You mean constantly blowing up buildings and taking people hostage?" Hero interrupts, still holding their baby close to their chest.
"-but you never came. I was starting to think you died," Villain finishes eloquently. "I can see now that you've been a bit busy." They take a step closer, and Hero takes another step back, trying to keep distance.
This was bad. Hero very much intended that no one would know about their child, enemies especially. They could feel anxiety rising in their chest, clawing at their throat.
Villain eyes their movement before speaking again. "Shame, I would have sent a gift if I'd known. Who's the other parent?" Their eyes shoot back up to Hero's as they ask.
"No one. She's mine, her other parent is irrelevant." Hero says defensively. The baby continues to cry, face red.
Villain looks over the both of them, humming as they consider this. "So you're doing this alone. How long have you been up for?"
The question seems harmless, and yet Hero hesitates, still not trusting Villain. The way they ask though, seems simply curious.
"...A few hours now. I can't get her to sleep." Hero finally says quietly.
Villain steps closer again, this time slowly, as if to not worry Hero. "I can tell," They snort, but the words are soft, "You look completely exhausted."
"Jeez thanks-"
"May I try?" Villain asks, voice gentle. Hero looks at them like they've grown three heads. The very idea that Hero would hand their child over to Villain is so beyond ridiculous, that they can't believe they asked.
Vilain sees their expression and rolls their eyes. "I'm not going to do anything to harm her. I know you'd kick my ass if I even tried. I'm good with kids, and you look like you're going to fall over any minute."
They step even closer and lift a finger to the small baby, which she grabs with her chubby little hand. Villain chuckles at the sight.
Hero watches, eyes fighting to stay open. Villain is right, they do feel like they're on the verge of collapse any moment. Arms are heavy from continuously rocking the baby, legs feel like jello.
"Okay, you can hold her for a moment. But I swear to everything that if you do anything to harm her, your body will end scattered in tiny pieces across the country." Hero warns, their voice more deadly than it's ever been with Villain.
Villain simply smiles as they reach out for the baby. "I wouldn't expect anything less." They take her in their arms, holding her comfortably. Hero immediately collapses down into the nearby rocking chair.
They rock her in their arms like it's the most natural thing in the world. Hero watches on in surprise as she starts to calm down somewhat, though she's still fussy. The lack of wailing level crying is a godsend though.
"How in the world.." Hero asks, amazed at the sight.
Villain grabs a pacifier off the near by changing table, giving it to the infant. She accepts it easily and finally settles down.
"I told you I'm really good with kids. Plus babies just like me," They say as they look down at the infant in their arms with the most genuine smile Hero has ever seen, "Also have you considered that she might be teething?"
Hero raises an eyebrow before yawning suddenly. "Ah..no I haven't. I'm new to this, and I feel like I'm learning as I go along..."
"It probably doesn't help that you don't have any help either. Why don't you rest for a bit while I hold her?" Villain suggests, noticing how on the verge of falling asleep they are. "I promise I'll stay right here, and she'll be okay. You should get some sleep."
"I'm not so sure about that..." Hero replies, though their head is already starting to sag. "How'd you get so good with kids anyways?" They ask, their eyes beginning to flutter.
Villain chuckles quietly. "You don't get to unlock my tragic back story that easily." But Hero is already asleep, passed out over in the chair. Villain continues to hold the baby as they drap a small blanket over Hero.
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fadingsnow · 5 months
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𓆙 london boy - CORIOLANUS SNOW x f! reader
summary and tw: coryo grovels at your feet, begging for forgiveness after years. pt. 2 of cardigan loveliess!! 18+, smut, mr. snow kinda basically bends u over on ur table?? a/n: uh sorry for making it a lil sad in the beginning but snow prevailss, divider credits : @cafekitsune
taglist: @targaryenmoony 𓆙
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He fell down onto the sofa, letting his head sink down against the pillows. Still, after five years, you plagued his thoughts. Tapping his fingers against his thighs, he didn't know what to do.
You hid yourself from him, not wanting to deal with all of the emotions behind his betrayal. You were able to find a quaint job, meeting the line of being able to finance yourself barely. Atleast you had a trust fund from your family, one of the benefits of the Capitol you suppose.
The one time, the one time, you decide to come back without any information on what was happening, you see him. You had heard small bits of Coriolanus' life from Tigris, but refusing for her to tell him she was in contact with you.
He still wore the same pin you gave him for his birthday. You remember his sombre look clearly, eyebrows furrowed and pursed lips. He didn't like being reminded of it, his mind forcing him to realize he had passed yet another year of his.. situation. You had gotten to work, spending days on it. You weren't that good of an artist, but you were able to engrave, "Snow lands on top." Clearly he did.
You really could go anywhere you wanted, but home. But now you had returned. You still considered him home. You thought this over, murmuring to yourself about how everything had changed. Did he still think of Lucy Gray? Did he even feel remorse - or guilt when he thought of you?
A knock at the door makes you jump out of your thoughts. What could it be now? You looked around the place in frustration, your rented apartment for now. You weren't sure how long you were going to stay, just going to meet some family and leave immediately.
You walked up to the door, getting on your tippy toes to look through the peep hole. At first, you saw whitish-blonde hair. Could it be Tigris? She never mentioned anything about visiting today.. You squinted your eyes, did you see the wrong Snow?
"Is anyone home?" You froze, stopping any movement. The click in your heart was pushed. If he couldn't hear your heartbeat, he must've been deaf. You went to sit down on your coach the quietest you could, trying to hide from what was happening. Hopefully, you were just going insane and imagining his voice. You told Tigris not to tell him where you were. You're going to have a lot of things to say to her when he leaves.
You waited a few minutes, only to check again and see that familiar face that you swore to not let yourself get attached to again. Your hand shakingly grasped the doorknob, going to unturn the locks. You couldn't run away forever. You should get it done and over with.
When you opened the door, you weren't sure what you should've expected. Furiosity? Sorrow? Joy?
You were greeted with someone you didn't know, Coriolanus Snow.
You stared at him in sheer surprise, not really knowing what to say. Should you shake his hand? Maybe that's strange considering the.. acquaintance you used to have.
He shuffled his feet, hands in pockets before he nodded towards your apartment. "May I come in?"
"Not like I can say no." You murmured, before fully opening the door. He stepped in, looking around anxiously because of you for the first time in his life.
He took this as his cue to go sit down, his hands pressed. "I want to apologize."
You scoffed, "Well, great. I forgive you." You didn't really want to deal with it anymore, trying to ignore the nagging feeling to listen to him.
"You can't see it? I'm still in love with you, not Lucy Gray. I regret it so much, I couldn't function. I dedicated those speeches all to you! Why the fuck would I care about how the Capitol was affected? I care about you! And now you're here, so please." He suddenly rose up, his desperation fuelling him to beg for you.
"And there's no way you don't want me back." He finally declared, his voice turning a little quiet now.
"And how do I know you won't do it again..?" You tried to forget him, you really did. His eyes never left yours, only a flutter of a blink made him turn his attention away from you.
"I love you, and I've known it for a long time. Since the Academy, I was too stupid to realize it. I let her get in between us, and for that, I'm sorry." He looked at the ground, what if you didn't forgive him?
Without thinking, you rushed to give him a tight embrace. Unabashed, you smelled him, and he still smelled the same. His hands went to wrap around your waist.
You hesistantly went up to kiss him. He eagerly returned the kiss back, but not wanting to scare you away. His lips were intoxicating just as much as you remembered. He broke into a grin, wanting to just bask in your essence.
He managed to murmur between breaths, "More?" His hands moving up to cup your face, tracing along your jawline and down your neck. His fingers trailed lightly over your bare shoulder before stopping at the hem of your dress, teasingly brushing against your exposed thigh.
You mumbled a yes, looking up at him.
He leaned in closer, their bodies pressed against each other intimately as he deepened the kiss, his tongue tentatively exploring your mouth. His hands moved higher up your thighs, reaching for the hem of your skirt.
His hands gripped your waist tightly as he lifted you up onto the nearest table, bodies pressing against each other intimately. The kiss became more aggressive, tongues tangling together in a dance of desire. He broke away for a moment, panting heavily. "C'mon..." he panted, reaching down to finally unfasten your skirt, revealing your lacy black underwear. "You're mine now."
"Tell me you want this," he murmured lowly, his voice husky with desperation.
"I do, Coryo. You know I do."
He hurriedly pulled it off, before slowly taking off his underwear. He took no time to tell you to spit on his hand.
"What..?" You squeaked out.
"Spit." Reluctantly, you spat on his hand.
He slid it over his now hard cock, wanting it to feel easy to slide into you. You let out a loud cry when he let it move through your folds, resting in place for a minute.
His head fell against your shoulder, inside of you but calm.
"You feel okay?" He asked, hot breath against your neck. "Can I move?"
"Mhm."
He moaned, thrusting slowly at first, savoring the feel of your tightness around him. "You're so beautiful, you know that? No, don't look away. Look at me." He grabbed your chin, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek.
Coriolanus complied, increasing the pace of his thrusts while maintaining a gentle rhythm. Each powerful stroke sent waves of pleasure coursing through both of them, the moans melding together in harmony. His hands roamed freely over your body, caressing your breasts and pinching her nipples gently. "Tell me you want it... tell me how much you need this," he panted between breaths, his voice hoarse with desire.
"Say my name, love..."
"Coryo!" You moaned his name, intertwining a hand with him.
Coriolanus's fingers dug into your hips, nails scratching lightly as he picked up the pace, his cock pounding into your tight cunt. His orgasm was building rapidly, and he knew it wouldn't be long before you both reached your peak. "Almost... almost..." He groaned out, his voice strained with desire.
"Here it comes," he warned just moments before releasing a hot stream of cum inside her, filling her completely. Panting heavily, he pulled out slowly, letting their juices trickle down her thighs.
He looked at you in pride, almost as if he was proud of the artwork infront of him. He went to cup your face, whispering, "You know I love you, right?"
"Depends, do you know I do?" You grinned at him, teasing him.
"President Snow loves meeee!" You said in a sing-songey voice.
"Well, I'm glad you're aware." He smirked at you softly, before bringing you in for one more kiss.
yk i love a londonn boy - me
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mrsbuckybarnes1917 · 6 months
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Request from @bisexuawolfsalt: May you please write a Bucky x virgin!reader who’s never been able to get herself off?
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female virgin!reader
Word Count: 5k
Warnings: masturbation, fingering
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Everything about you was different. You'd always felt it. You never fit in with the people you'd grown up with. Friends had never felt close. You were sheltered, your parents had a habit of being overprotective, helicoptering over you until they were in a fatal accident just before your eighteenth birthday. That's when things changed for you, not just what you'd lost, but your body too. You were different, but not in the way you'd thought all your life. You were powered. You kept to yourself throughout college, barely keeping anyone around you as more than an acquaintance. Relationships were a foreign concept to you, be it one of friendship or romance. You'd experienced neither.
That was your story, until you found yourself in New York City in the middle of a Chitari invasion. When you back up an Avenger with your powers, you get noticed. Tony Stark found you and brought you in. It took some convincing, you weren't ready, you were afraid. You'd hidden yourself with a job in the New York Public library. But eventually you agreed to move into the Stark Tower.
That's where you first met Bucky. You had gotten to know Steve, Natasha, and Tony pretty well. Steve had come to knock on your door one day and brought Bucky with him. He had returned from Wakanda, free from his Winter Soldier programming. He didn't look as frightening as people had described him. There was a kindness behind his brilliant blue eyes, an intelligence and a sadness that drew you in. He was a solitary soul and so were you. 
You felt comfortable in his presence. He said very little, in fact he barely made eye contact initially. Steve had encouraged him to make a friend and Bucky had chosen you, you didn't pester him about his well being, didn't cajole him about attending therapy, in fact you didn't bother him at all. You were the perfect friend. These were the reasons you believed Bucky had chosen you.
In reality Bucky couldn't get enough of being around you. He was drawn to you and you to him. Finally he had confessed his feelings to you and you had kissed him. Only Steve knew about your relationship with Bucky, you kept things private. You spent all your down time with Bucky but the two of you hadn't slept together, yet. Bucky had insisted that you wait until you were ready, after you'd told him that you hadn't been in any relationships in the past.
Today hadn't been any different from any other, not really. You'd spent time training in the gym with Steve, you'd done some reading, having decided to pursue a medical degree with your interest in science. You had a lot to learn, but you decided to take a break and grab yourself a bit of food. You walked into the kitchen where a group of SHIELD agents were also eating and talking. You blushed profusely when you heard their topic of discussion… masturbation!
“I love my Lioness. I swear if men’s penises were made with a vibration setting, I'd actually consider being with one,” one of them mused.
“Oh sweet girl, I’ve been married for five years, and let me tell you, sometimes only you have the means to get the job done. I mean I love my human dildo, but the rubber one gets the job done much better. It's got a suction up, so just slam it against the wall and go to town on it," her older colleague chimed in.
"Ah, you kids and your new fangled inventions and toys. I'm pretty old school, my fingers have been doing the job just fine for me all these years. Batteries not included," she smirked.
Their words made you blush, you had no idea what a Lioness even was, you cowered in the corner trying not to eavesdrop. The last thing you wanted was to be involved in this conversa-
"Hey!" You heard Piper, one of the agents calling your name. "What's your preference?"
You mostly kept to yourself, the other agents had no idea of your childhood or your lack of experience and you'd kept to yourself to avoid questions exactly like this.
“I - ummm…” you started stuttering nervously, eyes darting around for an excuse to avoid answering the question. You hoped no one would notice you biting your lip and wringing your hands with anxiety. “You know…”
“Come on girl, are you saying that hunk of yours is that good?”
“What?” You were shocked by Piper’s comment. 
“Barnes, is he as good in bed as he looks like he would be?”
“What-”
“You don’t need to pretend, we’ve seen the two of you holding hands and smacking lips.”
You blushed, you had no idea that other people were aware of your relationship. But they couldn’t know that you hadn’t sealed the deal, could they?
“You have to give us some details,” they laughed good naturedly. “Is he that good that you don’t need to … you know, take care of yourself every now and then?”
There was no malicious intent in their questions, they were just making jovial conversation and including you, but you just wanted the floor to open up and swallow you whole. You wanted to tell them that Bucky was good, but you knew that they weren’t asking if he was a good person, they wanted to know if he was good at sex. You weren’t so out of touch with the world that you didn’t know what they were insinuating.
“He’s an amazing person-”
You were cut off by their beepers sounding off at the same time. Saved by the bell.
“See you around.” They smiled and winked at you as they left to see to their duties.
A silent sigh of relief escaped your lips as you gathered your meal and sat down in the vacated dining area. Your heart was no longer pounding on the inside of your chest, but your brain was in overdrive as you ruminated over the conversation between the agents. Without realizing it, you were thinking about what masturbation would actually be like. 
You weren’t completely innocent or devoid of sexual urges, you had admired both handsome men and beautiful women, some of whom had even had you aroused. But you hadn’t dared act on those urges, mostly because you had no idea how and you were too ashamed to ask anyone you did know. You felt embarrassed that you had reached the age that you were without having had any real sexual encounters. You had been hesitant to explore your own anatomy, even in the privacy of your own home and now you’d reached the point in your life where you were too afraid to try it alone.
Your lunch remained half uneaten as you pondered your dilemma. Your interest had definitely been piqued and you started thinking about Bucky. He had been patient with you and your reluctance to engage in more intimate behavior. He had been incredibly understanding when you’d admitted to him that you were a virgin and hadn’t pushed you into any kind of non consensual conduct.
Everything you’d seen on television or read about, the act of sexual intercourse, the pleasure that came from an orgasm, you wanted to know how it felt. You felt a stirring between your legs at the very thought. But where would you get the information to do things right? You had so many questions. You thought about looking online but the computers in the Tower were all networked, and JARVIS had the ability to look into any search history. The thought of someone finding out terrified you. No, you would have to try something else.
This brought your thoughts around to Bucky. After careful consideration, you determined that Bucky was probably the best person to discuss your areas of learning. You knew that he was a little more experienced than you were and if you were to share a future with him, you would eventually engage in more intimate activity. So he would be the perfect person to ask. You picked up your phone and typed out a message.
You: Can I ask you something? It’s a bit embarrassing.
Bucky’s phone pinged as he sat listening to a discussion between Sam and Steve. He enjoyed watching them battle wits, as long as he wasn’t asked to take part. And when he did, he always sided with Steve, regardless of what his actual opinion was. He took his eyes off the pair to see your face light up his screen. Your face never failed to make the corner of Bucky’s mouth quirk up, as hard as he tried to hide it. 
Bucky had never met anyone quite like you. Despite the trauma and loneliness you had suffered, it hadn’t made you cold or hard, in fact he thought you were the single most kind-hearted and loving person he’d ever met. Your intelligence surpassed that of many and he was almost shocked that you had chosen to bestow your affection on him. You were his angel, sent from heaven to show him what real love was. He texted you back immediately.
Bucky: Anything. 
Bucky’s whole attention was on you now, your question had piqued his interest far more than the conversation between Sam and Steve ever had.
You: How do you masturbate?
Bucky’s eyes were ready to pop out of his skull as he read your question.
“Buck?” Steve called his friend again, trying to get his attention.
“Yeah?” Bucky cleared his throat, tearing his attention away from his phone.
“Can you settle this for us?”
“Yeah, I agree with Sam,” he answered.
Sam and Steve watched him get up and walk away with their jaws on the floor. But Bucky had no time for nor interest in their reaction. He was focused on your question.
Bucky: What makes you ask this question?
You: There were some agents in the kitchen and they were talking about masturbation…
Bucky: And you are curious?
You: Well yeah. So are you going to answer the question?
Bucky thought for a moment before responding.
Bucky: There isn’t just one way to masturbate. 
You: Care to elaborate?
Bucky: Most people use their fingers. Now they have all these toys.
He thought for a moment, before sending a follow up text.
Bucky: Back in the day, we would make do with what was around. You just need to use it right.
As much as Bucky longed to offer you a hands on demonstration of the concept, he knew that he should give you the space to learn and experience things at your own pace, particularly with regards to your sexual relationship.
Bucky: You need to figure out what YOU like.
You bit your lip as you read Bucky’s answers, your fingers hovering above the screen as you tried to work up the courage to continue your conversation.
You: I don’t know what to do.
Bucky: You just have to try things out and see how you feel.
You typed out your response, you felt a tingling between your legs and an unfamiliar dampness. It took you several minutes for you to press send.
You: Will you show me?
Bucky’s mouth went dry as he read your reply. He felt himself stir at that thought of your question. He read your words over and over, contemplating his next move.
Bucky: Are you sure?
Bucky didn’t want to pressure you, or make you do anything you didn’t feel comfortable with, but the thought of being closer to you, more intimate with you made his body react and he could feel blood pumping south.
You: Ordinarily I’d probably use a Google search but I’m not particularly where I should be looking. Also most things are probably not targeted at women past their teenage years. Also I didn’t particularly want to leave a trail of cookies in my search history.
Bucky wasn't quite sure he understood all of your message. I was rather old fashioned, and even though he had some understanding of the modern world, he didn't feel entirely comfortable. He decided to help you the best way he knew how.
Bucky: Meet me when you're done with work?
You: Sure. Where do you want to meet?
Bucky: Your room. 6pm. Wear something comfortable.
Butterflies fluttered in your stomach as you read his message and answered.
You: See you soon.
Anticipation and anxiety had you back in your quarters much earlier than the time Bucky had advised. You decided to be prepared for his arrival, so you took a shower and performed all your necessary grooming rituals. You weren’t entirely out of the loop with regards to sex, but clinical application was very different from actual intimacy. The thought of Bucky’s touch excited you. Your relationship with him mostly involved emotional intimacy, he was nervous too, worried about hurting you physically. He had been happy to let you take the lead for the physical aspect of your relationship.
The thought of his touch elicited a tantalizing reaction from your body, the warmth, the wetness between your legs was exhilarating. There was an urge to touch yourself. It wasn’t that you hadn’t thought about this before, even tried exploring your own body, but you’d never quite achieved the intended goal. Today felt different. You could feel yourself pulsing in a way that you’d not felt before. And if Bucky wasn’t able to help you understand your own body, you were certain that no one would.
You put on a slightly oversized t-shirt, it was loose enough for you to move with ease, but fitted enough that your figure wasn’t hidden. You grabbed a pair of booty shorts, choosing to slip it over your hips without any underwear. The feeling of them against your uncovered core made you feel wicked. Your heart was still pounding and you needed something to relax, so you grabbed a bottle of Pinot Noir and poured yourself a generous glass.
A knock at the door made you jump, and the contents of the glass sloshed around dangerously. You took a small sip before putting it down on the counter of the small kitchenette in your room and went to answer the door. 
“Hi.” You barely breathed the word as you found Bucky at your door.
He looked ethereal, he had clearly taken the time to go back to his room and prepare for your rendezvous after spending the day training new recruits. He slipped past you with a gentle greeting. He had washed his long hair which was loose and still slightly damp. He had donned a maroon Henley which you had told him was your favorite and as he brushed against you, you caught the scent of his cologne which did nothing but increase your arousal.
“How was your day, Doll?” Bucky asked, giving you a gentle peck on the cheek.
“Seriously, you want to ask about my day?” you said nervously, wringing your hands together.
Suddenly you felt out of your depth. How could this beautiful specimen of a man possibly be here for intimate relations with you? You turned around and took a mouthful of wine, coughing slightly as you swallowed.
“Hey, easy there, Doll. Being drunk isn’t helpful. You know,” he paused for a moment, “we don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with.”
He wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest. You could feel his heart beating as your head rested against him. It was calming and you looked up at him.
“I want to.”
“If you change your mind at any time, you will tell me, right?”
You nodded, appreciative of his understanding.
“Sit down for a minute. I’m just going to set up a few things.”
“What kind of things?
Bucky held up a few candles. “I thought they’d make you feel more comfortable, relaxed.”
You watched Bucky place candles around your room and then dim the lighting. His movements were elegant, so smooth. You marveled at his grace and agility, his touch was delicate and you wondered how his hands would feel on your body. When he was done he came over to sit beside you as you clutched your wine glass.
“Oh Bucky, I’m sorry, here, let me get yo-”
You stopped as he put his hands on your shoulders. “Listen, before we start, no matter what happens today, I’m just here to help you… you know, please yourself. That doesn’t mean that we need to go any further. You don’t owe me sex. Got that?”
You nodded, feeling more relaxed, like he’d taken the weight of expectation off your shoulders. “Yeah, okay,” you whispered.
“Anytime you want to sto-”
His words were cut off by your lips on his. “Sorry,” you pulled away slowly. “You were kinda freaking me out.”
Bucky chuckled at your shyness.
“So what now?” you asked, uncertain of how to proceed.
“Do you feel…” He wasn’t sure how to ask you if you felt turned on.
You shrugged. “Every time I think about this, I feel nervous, but also kinda tingly.” Subconsciously, you squeezed your legs together seeking the pleasure that came from the friction.
Your reflexive moments didn’t go unnoticed by Bucky. “You feel good?”
You nodded. “Will you kiss me?”
Bucky smiled, cupping your face with his hands, pulling your lips towards his, caressing them with his tongue before gently slipping it into your mouth. His right arm dropped down, coming to rest around your waist. Both of you lost yourselves in the kiss for a few minutes before Bucky pulled away. “Want to keep making out?”
“Well, it is nice, but I’m ready. What do I do?”
“Do you want to take your clothes off?”
A soft blush crossed your features, Bucky could see it in the glow of candlelight. You started taking off your t-shirt, raising your arms to pull it over your head. Bucky’s eyes lingered over your breasts, trying not to stare as you struggled with the neck. He eventually tore his gaze away to help you complete the task. Bucky tossed the shirt aside on a nearby armchair and turned back to you. You could help but try to cover yourself with your arms.
“You look beautiful, Doll.” Bucky murmured. “What can I do to make you feel more comfortable?”
“I mean, I feel kinda exposed. Maybe if we were on even footing it would be less awkward?”
Bucky laughed, “so you want me to take my top off?”
“I wouldn’t say no.”
Bucky used one hand to swiftly shed his Henley, letting you ogle his chiseled chest for a moment.
"Why don't make yourself comfortable on the pillows.” He nodded his head up to the top of the bed.
You followed his instruction, crawling over to the top. You’d spent many an evening with Bucky buried under the covers watching movies late into the night. Several times you’d woken up the following morning wrapped in his arms, but today was different. You sat back against the stack of pillows making yourself comfortable.
“Aren’t you coming?” You asked, realizing that he was still sitting at the end of the bed.
His eyebrows shot up into his hairline. “Well, if you want me to…” he answered, voice suddenly a little shaky.
“Were you planning on sitting there with all your clothes on, watching me get myself off. I mean that’s kinda off putting.”
He walked around the edge of the bed and climbed on to sit beside you.
“If you take off your pants, I’ll lose my shorts.”
“You drive a hard bargain, Doll.” He smirked before shimmying off his jeans.
As hard as you tried, you couldn’t help the flush on your face as you stared at the outline of his bulge. Bucky smirked.
“Like what you see, Doll?”
There was something in his tone that made your insides feel tight, like there was something inside you trying to escape and you kept squeezing to stop it. Your body responded to his words in a way you’d never felt before.
“Your turn,” he said quietly, not a command, more of a request.
You lifted your ass off the bed and pushed your shorts down, over your thighs, sliding them over your knees and let them fall over your calves. Bucky helped you to unhook them from your feet before tossing them to the foot of the bed, just in case you wanted them again. He took a moment to let his eyes rove over your naked form, oh how he longed to touch you, but today was not for him to indulge his fantasies. Today was for you.
“Will you sit with me?” you asked.
“Can’t get a lot closer than this, Doll.” He was sitting right beside you, his thigh touching yours.
“Can we sit like we did the other day? When we went to the beach?” You remembered how it had felt to sit between Bucky’s legs, his strong arms wrapped around you protectively. You felt safe from the world. It’s not that you needed Bucky to keep you safe physically, you were perfectly capable of looking after yourself, no, he made you feel accepted. It was a feeling you wanted to hold on to forever.
Bucky let you climb between his legs, taking a deep breath as your ass brushed against him, “Okay?” he asked, his hands holding the top of your arms gently.
You nodded. “What now?”
“Well… we just need to figure out what you like, what feels good for you.” He paused, trying to figure out how best to advise you. It wasn’t like there was an official manual to be followed. “May I?” He put his fingers around your wrist, asking for permission to guide your movements.
His palm radiated warmth and you felt goosebumps erupting across your arms. “That feel good?”
“Yeah.”
“Why don’t we start up here?” He guided your hand up to your neck. “Start with soft touches.”
Following Bucky’s instruction, you traced the muscles along your neck and across your clavicle. A soft sigh leaves your lips as you reach the center of your chest. Bucky’s eyes flicked to your face as you closed your eyes and leaned back into him, his chest moves up and down slowly. His sturdiness and strength only served to amplify your arousal. He saw you bite your lower lip as your fingers grazed the skin on your breast. Naturally you cupped it, massaging the tissue slowly. 
“Try pinching your nipple,” he whispered in your ear.
You do as you’re told and find yourself whimpering quietly. The feeling between your legs amplified ten fold, clenching needily.
“And the other side too, Doll.” Bucky muttered, his fingers sliding up and down your upper arm, the same arm you were using to touch your own body. “Feel good?”
“So good,” you sighed.
You leaned back again, the delectable sensations had you arching your back and now that you had moved past your breast, you noticed that the level of pleasure had changed a little, dimmed slightly. Bucky watched with rapt attention, mentally noting what you responded to for future reference. He resisted the urge to bury his face in your neck, press his lips against your sweet smelling skin. Your fingers skated quickly over your abdomen and made their way between your legs.
“Take your time, Doll. From what I've learned, getting a woman all worked up makes things more… intense.
"Before you touch down there, try rubbing here," he moved your hands to your thighs. "Just on the inside, Doll, just like that. You can use your fingers, or your whole hand. Try and see what you like."
You sighed, trying out the different techniques on the flesh of your thighs. Bucky’s skin itched with desire, there was nothing he wanted more than to put his own hands on your thighs, but he had promised you and he would keep his word.
“I like it more with my finger tips,” you leaned back into him, looking up into his eyes with a smile.
As you did, you noticed something pressing into your lower back. You pushed against it, curious about its shape. A shuddering breath and strangled moan escaped your boyfriend’s lips.
You looked back up at Bucky with surprise and you saw the blush on his face. It is a little embarrassing that it took you so long to realize what was touching you.
“Is that…”
“Yeah…you can just ignore… him. He shows up sometimes without invitation,” Bucky mumbled.
“Do you want me to-” you started asking if he wanted you to touch him, but Bucky cut you off.
“No, today we’re here for you. Focus on your own body.” Bucky shifted his hips back to avoid further friction but that didn’t quite stop his body reacting to you.
Bucky’s fingers skated across your skin with the lightest of touches, his breathing heavier than it was before as he watched your hands stroke over your inner thighs, edging closer and closer to your leaking core.
“Buck-” you whined quietly.
“Yeah?”
“I want…”
“Go ahead, start with one hand, maybe?” he suggested. “Feel over the outside.”
You hummed, arching back against him, and earning a groan from Bucky.
“If you feel comfortable, you can put your fingers between the folds and try rubbing your-.”
“Clit?”
“Yeah.”
“Wow, there’s a lot… it’s really wet.” You comment as your slick coats your exploring fingers.
“That’s good,” Bucky said encouragingly. “Have you found your-”
You gasped and grabbed Bucky’s muscular thigh as your fingers brushed over your sensitive bud for the first time. Your pussy clenched needily at the sensation. 
“I’ll take that as a yes,” he chuckled darkly.
You continue moaning as your fingers rub circles over your pulsing clit. “Oh Bucky…”
He groaned at the way his name left your lips, filled with such longing. He panted softly as his fingers dug into your flesh, he had moved them from your arms down to your waist and it was taking a lot of self control for him to not let them roam over the rest of your body.
“It feels, I … I -” You couldn’t find the words to express what you needed. The new deletable sensations were something you’d never experienced and it was almost overwhelming.
“Use your words, Doll. Tell me what you need.”
“Inside, I want something inside.” The throbbing at your core was getting stronger.
“Good girl, that means you’re doing it right.”
“How do I do it?”
“Move your legs apart a bit more.”
You obliged and Bucky moved his legs under yours so you could hook your ankles around them for support and open up for yourself.
“Ready?”
“Yes,” you said with more confidence, it felt good, you wanted this.
“Try putting one finger in first. Go slowly.” He put his hand on yours, directing your finger along your slit before helping you push into your entrance.
Your thighs tightened as your finger entered this new territory.
“Try to relax, Doll. Take your time.”
Your finger slipped inside, you took deep breaths in an attempt to slow your pounding heart. Bucky couldn't help himself, he put his hands on your thighs, almost a subconscious movement as he focused on your activities. Watching as you dragged your finger in and out of your dripping pussy.
"That's right, just like that." Bucky crooned in your ear. 
His lips felt soft on your neck. You didn't notice how he palmed himself at the same speed that your finger was disappearing inside you.
"If you want, you can put more fingers inside you."
“Umm hmmm.” You didn’t need his guidance to know what you wanted. “Keep talking though.” His voice in your ear was serving to be more an aphrodisiac than you’d expected. You changed the speed of your trusts, suddenly aware of a new feeling that you couldn’t quite identify.
“You like how that feels, Doll? Try hooking your fingers up slightly.” 
He knew you’d found the right spot because of the way you bit your lip and squeezed your eyes closed, pushing back into his chest.
“You’re allowed to make noise, Doll. Actually, I encourage it.”
Your hips began to rock of their own accord and you could hear Bucky panting behind you.
“Oh God,” you whined. “Bucky…”
“I’m right here, Doll. You’re doing so good,” he moaned. “Use this hand, here.” Bucky placed your other hand over your clit, letting you take over rubbing the hard bud.
“Bucky…”
“Yeah?”
“Bucky,” you whimpered desperately, brows knitted together. You had no idea what you wanted from him. “Bucky-yy.”
“It’s okay, Doll. You’ve got this.”
You did, because without warning you felt yourself hurtling over the edge of a precipice you didn’t know you’d been standing on. Your walls pulses around your fingers as your body undulated to the feeling of ecstasy spreading out from your core through to your fingertips. Your powers crackled in a glow that surrounded your body.
As your breath finally settled down, you relaxed back into Bucky’s arms, a ridiculous smile spread across your face. Bucky’s arms surrounded you, holding you making you feel safe and supported.
“So? How did it feel?” Bucky asked, a tad impatiently.
You laughed bashfully in response, words not quite able to describe how giddy you felt in that moment, until Bucky was laughing along with you. You caught his lips as he turned his head to look at you, expressing your thanks with an affectionate kiss. As you leaned back, you were reminded of Bucky’s situation. 
“That was amazing, Bucky. But what about you?” you asked.
“What about me?”
“Don’t you have to- I want to feel you… inside me.” Your voice dropped in volume at the end of your sentence.
Bucky shook his head. “Next time, today was for you. Besides, I kinda came when you were…” His voice trailed off looking a little embarrassed.
“Oh, sorry.” 
“No, it’s not your fault, well actually-”
“Hey!” you pouted.
“In a good way. You look beautiful."
"Thanks for not judging me."
"Thank you for accepting me. For trusting me."
"Of course, Bucky. What happens now?"
"After we get dressed, we can order some food and watch a movie?"
"And maybe plan for when we can do this again?" You asked shyly.
"Sure thing, Doll."
You were glad that you'd had the courage to ask Bucky for his help, and hopefully some day soon, you'd be able to feel even closer to him that you'd done today. 
769 notes · View notes
indecenthoney · 2 months
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"The Munchies"
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Have you ever had that one friend who acts like a completely different person after consuming alcohol? I sort of do. She's a tad bit on the shy side. Up until you present her with some candy. Her eyes would literally glow up at the sight. Not to mention, she becomes the clingiest, most loveable thing. I may be to blame for encouraging such behaviors, but how could I not? I could never ever get another reaction out of her if I wanted to. Completely deadpan, with a cold demeanor. It's enough to break a man's heart. Which brings me to my current situation. I may have a little crush on her. Or well a relatively big one. I've been meaning to ask her out in a good mood, but as I mentioned I could never really get that reaction. I wanted to find some way to help her relax a bit without needing the candies. I don't know. I wanted her to like me for me, you know?
"Hey... How long are you going to be working on that? It wouldn't kill you to take a break, you know? Uhuh... Dude! Let's hang out... This project isn't due till what... Two weeks from now... We can totally take our time... We're already halfway through... So let's go play something! Me? What does it look like I'm doing? I'm hugging you... I'm not going to stop hugging you until you follow me to play video games... I know you hate it... That's why I'm hugging you, silly... Either way, it's a win-win for me... Aw... and here I thought I'd get to hug you for an hour or two? Good choice... C'mon, I'll show you to my room..."
On my way to my room, I found her eye-ing out my kitchen. It was pretty obvious what her intentions were. I wasn't really sure either what snacks I had lying around in there, but I sent her off to my room to choose a game while I scrounged around for something for her to eat.
"Do you want something sweet? I thought so... I'll see what I can do... Uhuh... Just head down the hall, to the right... Make yourself comfortable!"
It was inevitable. Then again, I guess I'd rather give her what she wanted rather than see her disappointed. You should have seen me. I was a man on a mission trying to find those snacks. Eventually, I realized that there wasn't any lying around and I had to bear seeing her sad. Is it a reaction? Yes. Is it a good one? No. I took my time cleaning up and figuring out what to tell her. On my way down, I found myself stopping at the door after hearing some "noises". At first, I assumed it was something coming from the television. With my curiosity piqued, I barged in without a second thought. Unfortunately, this put me in a compromising situation. Okay, I know it's my house. But I should know better than to walk in without a warning. My friend was there. Of course, she was. Where else would she be? You know, I just didn't expect her to be on my pillow. Rubbing herself against it. I stood in shock as she mindlessly grinded herself not paying any mind to me. it was like she was in a sort of trance.
"Hey! W-woah... Uhm... What the fuck are you doing? Hahaha... uhm... F-fuck..."
I wasn't entirely sure what to do especially since there wasn't anything to play off on. She was grinding away. No response. But upon closer inspection, there were wrappers scattered on the floor and bed. The shy little thing got herself high from consuming the edibles placed on the tableside near my bed. I quickly rushed over to stop her. Placing my hands around her hips to keep her down. Only whimpers and tears were replaced with the sudden stop.
"H-hey... Shhh... Shhhh it's okay... I'm sorry... Ugh fuck... What am I supposed to do with you? Uhm... Let's see... H-hey! C'mon... It's okay... Why are you still crying? You can rub... It's okay... Stop crying, okay? I'm sorry for stopping you... "
After consuming this many brownies, I doubt she'd be able to speak. I'm surprised she was still even functioning at this point. I didn't expect her to have such a drastic personality change after a few brownies. She wouldn't stop crying. I soon realized her trying to move her hips faster. I guess the stimulation wasn't enough to satisfy her. Luckily, I had an idea. Not to fulfill my own selfish desires, but to help a friend out. I mean, what was I supposed to do? Leave her a whimpering sobby mess?
"I-it's okay... Just for a moment... Sit here... I know... I know it hurts... But we'll get it settled in a bit... You just have to be a good girl and listen, okay? That's it... Such a good girl... Does it feel good when I rub you there? Hm? I know it's hard to talk... Just nod your head... Yeah? Ah no... No moving your hips... If you wanna feel good then you'll have to listen, don't you? That's it... Nice and easy... Keep those legs spread for me, hun... Such a pretty lady... So needy... So wet... I'm only rubbing your clit and you're just leaking... Why don't we take these off, huh? We wouldn't want to ruin your panties more than we already have... Shhh... It's okay I'm just taking these off and we'll continue... I'll give a little more than just rubbing... I promise... Oh fuck... A literal bitch in heat... Gonna slide a finger in, okay? Oh? Well, don't you fit perfectly around my fingers... So tight... Mm... What pretty little noises you have... There's no need to be shy... It's okay to feel good..."
Slowly digging away into her deepest parts causing her to spasm. Choking on her moans as the pleasure increases. Her hands clasped around my forearm. A sign informing me that she's close to the edge. Slowing down my pace even more to keep from finishing too quickly. Soft slow strokes. My middle finger moving in and along her slit. A flick at her clit once at the top. Sending a shockwave of spasms throughout her body. I knew it was about time to give her a break. Running my fingers along her body; lifting her shirt. My hands finding their way up her bra. Running circles around her perky breasts. Pinching. Poking. Tugging.
"Hm? You're going to have to use your words... I'm not going to be able to understand you if all you do is moan and whimper... Please? You wanna cum? What's the magic word? Fine... In a bit... I'm still having my fun... Oh? Sensitive there, are we? Be good and I'll give you your reward... Pretty little thing... Does it feel good? Uhuh yeah? Sound so fucking stupid when I touch you here... Are you going to cum just from your nipples being played with? No cuz that would be pathetic, wouldn't it? Almost there, hun... Keep it up... You're doing such a good job for me..."
Hands appreciating every nook and cranny of her body. Tempting her but never really touching the place that needs it the most. Lips pressed. Tongues rolled. A dance of oral pleasure. The taste of brownies lingered on my tongue. How many wrappers were there? I wouldn't be surprised if I got high from tasting her lips. If it were my choice, I would spend an eternity in this bliss. However, she quickly made her needs known. Whimpers and tears once flood the room. Her inability to stay still grew restless as I toyed with her body. One final kiss and I was on my knees. Pulling her hips to the edge of the bed. The softness of her thighs welcomed my cheeks with each kiss. I start to salivate; eager to run my tongue along the drippy mess I've made. In my own trance, I started eating away at her. A different type of hunger had filled me. Something that couldn't be satiated so easily. I wanted her to quake my touch. Moan at the very thought of me. Get wet at every little word I mutter as I adore her perfection.
"Mmph... Fuck... you taste so good, hun... Mmm... I know... I know... I shouldn't talk with my mouth full... I can't help it... You're just too damn pretty right now..."
Her grip tightens; pulling my head into her. Her morality leaking between her legs as I lapped my tongue into her depths. A wave after wave of orgasms causes her to shake. Even with my tongue gently finding its way around her clit, it brings her to the edge over and over. I found pleasure in serving her. With cock in hand, I stroked myself to completion. Even then it was barely enough to fill that hunger. Grabbing her wrists I stood above her; pinning down her arms before placing my cock against the opening of her pussy. Feeling her squirm on the tip. Watching her eyes roll back as the length of cock disappears into her.
"Hey hey... Shush... You're doing such a great job... Mhm... I know you came... I'm sorry, sweetie... Just a little longer, you can take it... All you have to do is stay still and be pretty, okay? Can you do that for me, hun? Mhm... Good girl... Not a single thought behind those pretty eyes, huh? That's it... Cum as you please... I'm not stopping you..."
Hands pinned above her head as I rut into her in the most animalistic, primal way. Enjoying every bit of her reactions as I pump my cum back into her. Even as she drifts off to sleep, I found myself using her and using her. Satiating my hunger. I was unsure of how things would play out tomorrow, so I wanted to enjoy myself while it lasted. Making my mark. Filling her to the brim. I wore myself out. But even then, I wanted to use her. Finger the very holes I came in. Fucking her with my fingers to keep the cum from leaking. Never wanting this happiness to end.
"Oh! You're awake... What happened? Well... You kinda nodded off while I was looking for snacks... You okay? A dream? You were moving a lot during it... but I didn't wanna wake you from your nap... Sore? Hm... You're probably just hungry... Here... I found some brownies... It's really good... You should try some!"
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Take a bite,
Honey
381 notes · View notes
pupcuck · 4 months
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JINGLE BELL COCK !
ft. leon s. kennedy x fem!reader
tags. p in v, uncle/niece incest, somno
notes. MERRY CHRISTMAS!! this is very messy and rushed i haven’t been able to write properly lately so forgive me for the repetitiveness and clunkiness!! ignore typos as always :3 feedback n rbs always appreciated !!! this is reallyyy sloppy and I’m embarrassed so I may go back and delete and rewrite in a few days time 😭
tumblr has started to remove fics that use tw non-con, tw incest and any nsfw tags in general. for this reason, as i’d like my fic to appear in the tags so i can have the same reach as other authors, please understand that this fic contains dark content under the cut. reading this comes at your own risk.
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“Woah,” Leon's knees almost buckle when you barrel into him, “Pumpkin, wow,” He takes you in, settles his hands on your hips, and it might be inappropriate ‘cause your mother glares at him over your shoulder. What did she want him to do? Grab your ass? Could’ve, should’ve, would’ve. Just doesn’t wanna get put on a list of some kind. “You’re so big now.”
“Yeah?” Your cheeks split with a sweet smile, “I missed you, uncle.”
“God, you’re so big I can’t believe it,” He gives you a once over, he’d like to catcall you to show you how he feels, Leon refrains from doing so. “I remember when you were a kid, always sat in my lap ‘n said you wanted to marry me.”
“Awww,” A gloved hand comes to pat his cheek, you take the tip of the fabric between your teeth, taking it off finger by finger, “I can do that again if you’d really like, uncle.” Your nails scratch his scruffy chin, press your finger into the divot he hates so much, then you stare right at it. Don’t look at that, god. Totally messed him over. Shit fucked up his golden ratio.
“What're you lookin’ at, pumpkin?” He shifts from foot to foot, moves his flight bag from one shoulder to the other.
“Just never seen you with a beard,” You shrug, beaming at him once more. Okay, not the chin then, thank fuck. “It’s cute, uncle, makes you look older.” Leon doesn’t know if that’s good or bad, though he feels his spinal disk shrink with each passing second.
You turn on your heels when his sister-in-law, fine as ever, says your name, “We should go before she gets pissy.” You tell him cheekily, taking his hand in yours, and you’re so big now he can’t believe it. A whole lot of tit, hip, and your ass ain’t too shabby either. Leon’s justification is that he’s only a man, can't help himself when he sees a pretty girl, even if said girl is his niece. He’s an honest guy, gotta give his brother props for marrying such a smokeshow, even more credit for knocking her up. ‘Cause she popped out an even hotter girl, younger, brighter, and your tits sit prettier.
Their family stands on crumbling foundations, when he’s around his brother, Leon’s five seconds away from blowing his brains out at any given moment. He doesn’t know why people question his suicidal tendencies, he’s more than willing to show them. Snow crunches under his boots as he navigates the path leading up to the front door. The layer of glossy red paint has chipped away to reveal the mahogany beneath. It’s been that long, huh?
“I’m in college now, I have my licence and everything, uncle, I wanted to visit you in D.C. but I couldn’t get ahold of you,” You chatter to him, tugging at your laces and propping your shoes up on the shelf near the door, make the move to grab his suitcase, but Leon swiftly moves it aside. “I can carry it, I’m a big girl now.”
“No, you’re not,” Leon frowns, to him you’re a baby. An undeveloped prefrontal cortex and a soft spot on the top of your head. Yeah, you got a rack now, sure, he wants to fuck you now - doesn’t change a thing.
“Okay, well did you bring me a present?” You trail after him, and you really are still a baby.
“Yeah, you’re my favourite girl, I bought you lots.” He’s not sure if you’ll like it. Colouring books, dolls, plastic jewellery. He’s a bit of an idiot. Didn’t think about how long it’s been.
“Can I open them now?” You seat yourself next to him on the couch, knee bumping his.
“Later, pumpkin, I promise.”
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“I want to transfer to Washington.” Wine trickles over the edge of your cup, Leon soaks it up with a napkin, dabs at your face when a rivulet dribbles down your chin.
His brother’s knocked out in their dad’s old armchair, it’s beyond saving, but he’s cheap. Your mom retired to bed a while back, they argued over something trivial, a cheeseboard or some shit, and with that it leaves the two of you.
“Yeah? You got friends out there or what?”
“No, but you’re there, uncle.” You grin, batting your lashes so pretty he gets without popping a viagra or two. Three. He needs three minimum. “I could come stay with you, right?”
Fuck no, under no circumstance should he be allowed within fifty feet of you. And here Leon is, bumping knees, brushing fingers like you’re lovesick teens on a first date. That’s just not right, is it? He’s a decrepit old man on his way to getting a senior bus pass, and he’s your uncle and all. Can’t really go around popping boners over family members.
“I work too much.” Leon says coolly, sweat dripping from his temple, drumming his fingers against the table. “Hey, you wanna open your presents?”
“Yes!” You nod with wild enthusiasm, like a bobblehead, cute ones you keep on the dashboard. Leon would love to take you home with him, display you on the mantle like a China doll, show you off like some rare artefact. Just can’t, he’d end up doing something awful, peeking in on you showering— or worse he’d start sleepwalking, get into your room- “Go get them then, uncle.”
The paper is pink, the shade you used to adore as a young girl, the colour you’ve since painted over in your room. He got that professionally wrapped, big bow on it and all. Leon’s not good at making things look pretty. It’s easier to assemble a gun than it is to wrap presents. Your name is scrawled on the tag in cursive writing that belongs to none other than Claire, she insisted on doing so, felt inclined after seeing his chicken-scratch.
“It’s for me, you shouldn’t have, uncle!” You snatch it out of his hands, Jesus, had more manners when you were a kid. Once you tear through the paper, you blink down at the plastic princess costume jewellery. Clip-on earrings, fluffy mules that are much too tiny, the whole lot. “Oh, wow, well, it sure is nice.”
“Pumpkin,” Leon starts, “It slipped my mind that you’re a big girl now, I wasn’t thinkin’ and I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” You placate him with your smile, “I’m just glad you’re here.” Cheesy, still makes him swoon.
“We can go shopping ‘fore I go back, I’ll buy you whatever, yeah?”
“I don’t need that,” You shake your head, eyes flitting from his lower half then to his lips. He’s making shit up in his head now. It’s late, Leon should go to sleep, doesn’t wanna start kissing on you and end up in court. “Oh, you’re going already?”
“I’m tired, pumpkin.” My dick is so hard it’s cutting off all blood flow to my brain, my pants are squeezing it so tight I’m gonna contract sepsis and that shit will fall straight off, I don’t want my dick to fall off, pumpkin, hope you can understand my reasoning. Leon hopes you can see the desperation in his eyes, that you can see the sentiment he’s trying to get across.
The bed creaks with his weight, and it’s the same dusty, bed-bug ridden shit his brother’s had for years. He jerks off, blows his load on his stomach, too worn out to clean it up. Falls asleep with his hand down his pants. Then Leon starts having wet dreams like he’s twenty-one again, of your petal lips, of your hands on his dick, your tits, how your thighs look when you sit. Warmth engulfs his cock, and it’s so real, he’s so sure you’re right there, sucking him off like a good girl. You’re cute like a sex doll, and it’s unfair that he has to put on this uncle act. Used to come natural to him when you were a kid, but it’s just different.
Only when Leon lifts his hand does he come into contact with skin, with hair, and a human. At first, he thinks it’s the dog, one of the three. Then he feels small hands parting his thighs further, the familiarity of your smile warming his skin.
“Pumpkin.” Leon rasps, and it’s not quite warning, just a tone that says keep going, but this is fucked up, doesn’t mean I don’t want it though. He thanks you for making the first move.
You pull off with a wet pop, kissing along his Apollo’s belt. “I want to come to D.C. and stay with you,” You say between fervid kisses, “I want to be with you, uncle, you’re handsome and I like you.” Your confession is feverish, he wonders if you realise the weight of your words. Can’t go around telling lonely old men that you like ‘em.
“I’m your uncle, pumpkin.” Leon states simply, ‘cause he’s an adult and he’s collected, but you can keep pumping his dick like that, he really don’t mind.
“No one would know,” You kiss the sticky tip, pre smeared over your lips like lip gloss, tongue poking out to taste him, dipping into his leaky slit. “I could be your girlfriend.” Leon doesn’t even know you, he knows the little girl you once were.
Leon’s too old for that shit. Girlfriend boyfriend talk. “I’m too old to be dating, pumpkin.” He cradles the back of your head with his calloused hand, guides you to base of his shaft, your tongue tracing the vein that runs along the underside of his cock.
“Yeah, but you’re not too old to marry me, are you?” You’re a clever girl, giving him a cheeky smile as you sit up and clamber into his lap.
“What’s gotten into you, pumpkin?” Don’t stop, pumpkin. Same thing. He hopes his dick says enough, standing proud as you lift your hips, wet hole stretching to accommodate his fat tip. Leon can’t see your face, but he shuts his eyes and thinks about it, how your lips would part so pretty, and you’d toss your head back, sweat making your skin all shiny.
“I just really like you, uncle.” One way ticket out of this shitty town, away from his shitry brother, away from your narc bitch of a mom, free food, free housing - Leon understands your motive. Truly, he does, and he can’t find it in himself to give a damn. If you pretend to love then it matters all the same.
“Okay, then sit on it, pumpkin.” Leon urges, firm hands finding purchase on your hips, forcing you down on his cock till you take all of him to the hilt. The head bumps your cervix, and Leon is in love with you. Thank fuck he came back home, thank god, thank Claire for pushing him to the point of booking a flight. “You wanna marry me?”
“I told you, didn’t I? Promised I was gonna marry you when I was a kid.” You press your tits flush to his chest, lips ghosting Leon’s. “I wanna marry you so bad, uncle, you’re all I want.” And Leon can’t help himself, doesn’t mean to let go so early, the coils of heat in his belly turn searing, and he empties himself into you with a groan. The quiet noise of disappointing you let out as his cock softens inside of you is adorable.
“You gotta get used to that if you marry me, I’m old now.” He strokes your head, holds you tight, refuses to let go now that he’s got you.
“I can deal with it, uncle, as long as I get to be your wife.”
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Chipper and Pleasant - S.Snape
Summary - When she got overwhelmed with the baby, Y/N went to who she knew could help, her husband Severus.
Pairings - Severus Snape x Wife!Reader
Warnings - Stress of a baby, use of Y/N, female reader, Snape is a girl dad
Author's Note - It took a bit because I've been so busy but she's here.
Based off this request from an anon! Thank you for the request!
my masterlist
Feedback is welcomed and encouraged!
Enjoy!
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not my gif
The Hogwarts students only knew Severus Snape as a cold-hearted professor whose class was near impossible to pass. Even the other professors thought he was a hard ass but most of them had known why he was such a hard ass as well as cold. There were, however, only a small few people who truly knew Severus, one of them being his wife Y/N. 
They had gotten married right out of Hogwarts, Severus never really understanding how love can change a life until he met her. And don’t even get him started on when his daughter was born. Even the students had noticed a slight change in attitude from the professor. They were never able to connect the dots until one day a woman and a baby walked through the great hall during dinner. 
Y/N was having a hard time soothing their daughter, no matter what she did she couldn’t get the baby to stop crying. She was desperate and knew that Severus was the one that could calm her in a minute. The wailing of a baby made Severus’ head lift, knowing that it was his baby. He quickly got up and rushed over to his overwhelmed wife, gently taking the baby from her.
“Is she hurt? Are you hurt? Are you girls okay?” Severus rushed out as he cradled his daughter, looking both of his girls over. 
“She just won’t stop crying Sev, no matter what I do she just won’t stop. I was just trying to clean the house and she started and I tried to feed her but nothing-”
“Okay, it’s okay love. Relax, take a breath,” He soothed his wife quickly before turning his attention to the baby in his arms. He noticed a tooth poking out from her gums, another right beside it. “I see the problem here. I have just the thing you need, my sweet girl.”
“What is it? She’s okay?”
“Her teeth are coming in, she’s hurting. I had a draught made up and ready for this. Come with me.” The couple was quick to leave the great hall, the second they left the students started to gossip about the scene they had just witnessed. Dumbledore allowed the students to discuss before interrupting.
“May I have your attention please,” He waited for the great hall to fall silent once more, “Thank you. I ask that you allow Professor Snape to tell you about what you have just witnessed rather than start rumors. He will tell you so do not push him to answer questions.”
The next morning, Severus had taken his daughter with him to his first classes to let his wife sleep for once. The baby was sleeping peacefully in a portable crib next to his desk. “Good morning, students. There are a lot of rumors going around so I’m going to debunk them. That woman is my wife and this baby is my child. Simple as that, let’s get on with the lesson.”
The day went by quite quickly, the couple being the main talk of the whole school. Everyone was surprised that Snape was a major softy when it came to his girls. They had never seen the broody professor smile so much, let alone ever. They had never heard him speak gently or with a shred of happiness until his girls showed up. They had started a petition to get his family to stay at Hogwarts with him because he turned out to be so pleasant with them around. The potions master turned out to be a happy man with his family who was there to stay with the go ahead from the headmaster. Severus Snape was no longer known as the broody and cold professor but now the chipper and pleasant professor.
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theemporium · 3 months
Note
may i request a quinn hughes fic, about them being neighbours (reader is a good 4 years younger than him) in the same apartment building (and think the others cute), see eachother in the elevators all the time, but eventually they talk and boom bam you picture the rest
thank you for requesting!🫶🏽
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After one of the worst days of your life, it shouldn’t have surprised you that the universe would pick today of all days for your cute neighbour to catch you outside your apartment.
If it had been any other day, it would have been a funny situation you could have laughed at and maybe joked about. But it wasn’t any other day, it was today and today fucking sucked. From your alarm not working in the morning to missing the bus, to spilling coffee all over your notes in a lecture to getting yelled at during your shift at a local cafe. 
From the moment you woke up, everything seemed to be going wrong and you just wanted to crawl into bed, maybe indulge in a takeout and cry in bed with the hope that tomorrow would be better. Except, you had climbed the flights of stairs to your apartment (because of course the elevator was broken) only to find out you left your keys inside when you were rushing around that morning. And, according to the message from your landlord, the blacksmith wouldn’t be able to come out for another few hours. 
Which left you sitting against your apartment door, soaked to the bone because Vancouver weather was no joke, sniffling to yourself because an attempt to call your mother and cry to her failed when it rang into voicemail. 
So of course that was exactly how Quinn Hughes had to find you. 
“Are…are you okay?” 
Your head snapped up to find the boy standing a few feet away from you, dressed in sweatpants and a hoodie with a gym bag over his shoulder. He looked ridiculously cute in the blue Canucks beanie on his head and the soft expression on his face as he took in your current state. 
“I got locked out,” you answered with a pathetic laugh because if you didn’t laugh, you would have cried. Again. 
“That isn’t what I asked,” he said, a teasing glint in his eyes. “I asked if you were okay.”
“Yeah, totally,” you scoffed, waving him off. “I’m so fine.” 
You waited for him to nod, accept your answer and make his way to his apartment a few doors down. Instead, you were surprised to find him dumping his bag on the floor and settling against the wall across from you as he sat on the floor.
“You look like you’ve had a rough day,” he admitted with a sheepish expression.
“Just what every girl wants to hear,” you snorted.
His cheeks burned a little. “No, I didn’t mean like that—” But he stopped when you snickered a little, something in his chest easing at the sound. “I just meant you aren’t smiling properly.”
You raised your brows. “Smiling properly?”
“Yeah, your smile seems fake. Usually you have these big smiles on your face whenever I see you,” Quinn confessed. 
“Maybe those are reserved just for you,” you said the words before you could stop them, your face burning even hotter. 
“I would hope so,” Quinn retorted. 
You pressed your lips together, trying to resist the urge to let one of those massive smiles take over your face. However, the boy caught your attention again as he lightly nudged your leg with his foot.
“How about you wait at my place until the blacksmith comes?” Quinn asked, and despite the bravado a captain should have, he looked a bit nervous. “I’ll give you some clothes to change into before you catch a cold.”
You started shaking your head. “You don’t have to—”
“I want to,” he answered quickly. “I want to help.”
Your gaze softened. “You sure?”
“Yeah,” he said as he moved to stand up again, grabbing his bag and swinging it over his shoulder before stretching his hand out to help you up. “And in return, maybe you can tell me what happened to make it look like you went through a war zone.”
“Way to charm a girl, Hughes,” you snorted.
“It seems to be working alright so far,” he countered, a cheesy grin on his face as he pulled you towards his apartment, not quite ready to let go of your hand just yet. But neither were you.
.
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luveline · 5 months
Note
hi can i request girl dad!aaron 🥺🥺 i am such a sucker for him, anything would be amazing thank you so much <3
hope this is okay!! —you have big news for your small family. 1.5k pregnant!mom!reader
When you first married his father, you weren't expecting Jack Hotchner to like you very much. Losing his mom so young, you wouldn't have blamed him for resenting you, or even hating you. You were like a stranger in his home. 
Things are different now. Jack lays in your lap with his head on your shoulder, and maybe he's a little too old for such a coddling cuddle, but who really cares? You love him and you love holding him, and if he wants some extra comfort tonight you're happy to give it. Plus, you have something you've been meaning to tell him.
“He doesn't have real headlights, did you know?” Jack asks. “They're just stickers.” 
You raise your brows at the car on screen. “No kidding.” You brush your fingers through his hair. He's blonde like his mom, though that blonde has turned brown the older he gets. 
“Race cars don't have headlights.”
“They don't need them,” you say. Jack smiles at you shyly and leans into your neck, clearly pleased. 
You're very, very glad that you ended up being someone he loved. It's a privilege to get to look after him, and to be his step mom. In the same way you're lucky to be Aaron's partner and Jane's mom, too. 
“Think dad's made dinner?” you ask. 
“No, he's probably just talking to your sister.” 
Yes, well. You can't blame him, nor would you want him to stop. He talks to Jane like she understands, and Jane, not even two years old, nearly brand new to the world, soaks him in. You can hear him if you strain, the dulcet cadence of his voice under the steady hum of the dishwasher. 
“That's okay, sweetheart, don't get upset,” he's saying, “it's okay. Come here, I've got you.” 
Jane starts to cry. You and Jack give one another the look, apprehensive in hoping it won't turn into a full blown melt down. 
“Honey?” Aaron calls. “Sorry, where did you put her other pacifier?” 
You kiss Jack's hair. “Sorry, bub. Wanna come with me?” 
Jack wants to stay and watch Cars. You wrap him in a throw blanket and make your way into the Hotchner kitchen, where Aaron rifles through the drawers and cabinets with Jane held snugly to his chest. “I know,” he says, “I know. I'll get it.” 
You nudge him aside. You only know where the spare pacifier is because you put away the wooden spoons last night and pushed it back. You fish for it, a ladybug made of glittery red plastic, and Jane's crying slows as soon as you pull it free. She grizzles while you rinse it, but she settles when you hand it over. 
“This is not the best, is it? The pacifiers?” you murmur. 
“She dropped her other one and it rolled under the oven. And no. Not ideal.” He pats her back gently. “As long as she stops before she gets her big teeth, she'll be okay.” 
“Do you think it's a comfort issue?” you ask. 
“No,” he says. You worry about stuff like this constantly, but he knows kids are more hardy, and he isn't worried. “Sorry for making you get up.” 
He hates when she cries; he may see his kids as a hardy bunch, but he takes their upset as a personal failure half the time. His concern for her overrides his concern for you, but in a few weeks that might change. You can't imagine him calling you to find something again when your stomach is round as a honeydew. 
You've been meaning to tell him about that, too. 
You're not secret-keeping immorally, he does want another baby, but you've been having a little bit of fun. He's gone on cases so often lately that he hasn't been able to keep track of you, or your doctor's appointments.
You watch him with Jane, and you think about him with Jack, and you know he's going to be happy. He's told you as much before. 
“My poor girl,” he says, covering the back of Jane's head with his hand and pulling her under his chin. He looks as fine as ever, tall, dark and handsome to a fault. Jane's lips smack as she sucks and digs her teary cheek into his chest. 
You can feel his gaze on you. “Is now a good time?” he asks. 
You shrug. “For what?” 
“To tell me what you're not telling me.” 
“Oh, busted,” you croon, aiming for his shoulder. 
You do as Jane had and press your cheek to his front, your eye forced shut. 
“What do you think it is?” you ask. 
He makes a strange noise. You can practically hear the possibilities for your secret running through his head. His birthday is vaguely soon, so that's what he'll settle on first. But Aaron likes to disregard the obvious as most people do, only circling back to it when there's no other lead to follow. 
“How big of a secret is it?” he asks, rubbing Jane's back diligently. She makes a happy sound, and for a moment he forgets his plight to kiss the top of her head. 
You speak quietly, carefully, because it is big, huge news. “The pamphlets say it’s about the size of a strawberry.” 
He puts his cheek to Jane's head softly, looking at you in confusion. A second, another, and his eyebrows start to relax, rise, a smile on his lips like it's too good to be true. “You are?” he asks in surprise.
Jack appears in the doorway with the throw blanket trailing behind him. “Y/N, when are you coming back to watch TV?” 
“Jack, lovely, come here. I have something to tell you,” you say. 
Aaron grabs your wrist. When you meet his eyes, he squeezes gently. “You're sure?” he asks. 
“The doctor seemed pretty certain, handsome.” You lower your voice as Jack comes to stand in front of you. “Are you happy?” 
“Happy about what?” 
You put your hand on your stomach cautiously, worried about Aaron and how quiet he's being, and if it's as okay to tell Jack as you'd thought, but that action is what gets him. “I love you,” he says quizzically, as though his being happy is totally dependent on the fact. “Of course I'm happy. This is the best secret you could've kept.” 
“About what?” Jack asks, patting your arm. 
You bend down just a bit to see his face properly. “It's a secret you can't tell anyone for a while, okay? The only people who can know for now are me, you, and dad.” 
“Can I tell Jane?” he asks. 
“Yeah, buddy, you can tell your sister,” Aaron says. 
You peer at him from the corner of your eye, both concerned and pleased to see the wetness ringing his waterline, and the tenderness with which he holds Jane close, his thumb rubbing little circles into her back. 
“I'm going to have another baby,” you say. 
Jack's jaw drops. “Right now?” 
“No, not right now! You still remember last time?” you ask with a laugh, taking his shoulders into your hands. 
“You were crying and shouting for dad to hold your hand.” He pokes your stomach. “So it's like Jane?” 
“Maybe one day, sweetheart. For now, it's just a tiny baby.” 
Jack wants to see your stomach. He's expecting a much bigger bump than you have to offer, but you explain that eventually it'll get bigger again, and he seems quite pleased. Aaron makes sure to give him a hug and ask him if he's okay, to which Jack says, “Yes, but can we have a brother this time?” 
You rub the soft top of your stomach. “I'll see what I can do, Jack.” 
Aaron commandeers your attention, kissing you more times than you can count. You don't think you've ever seen him this happy now the reality has truly set in, asking Jane in his murmur, “Do you want to be a big sister?” 
She gurgles around the pacifier, leaving drool in a line down his chest. 
“I know, honey. I'm excited too. Let's clean you up, mm? And make mommy a cup of hot cocoa…” He narrows his eyes at you. “Would you sit down?” 
“I'm only ten weeks, I'm fine.”
“She's keeping secrets from me, and now she won't do what I'm asking,” he says to Jane. “Can you believe it? Anyone would think mommy doesn't like me as much as she claims.” 
You kiss his cheek. “M'having your baby, Aaron, again.” 
“That is a compelling argument.” He wipes Jane's cheek. “What do you think? Should we forgive her?” Jane laughs. He smiles at you, lovesick. You're not sure who for. “I guess we're letting you get away with this one, sweetheart. But no more secrets.”
“None,” you promise. 
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mizusnose · 3 months
Note
ahem so I just read your college fuckboy mizu headcanons (which I loved) and was wondering if I could request a lil something about fuckboy mizu genuinely liking the reader so she makes changes to convince the reader she's serious. Reader would probs be SUPER skeptical bc casual relationships isn't their thing but it'd be so cute. Obvs you can just ignore this if you don't want to do it my mind has just been mizu brainrot lately
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so i’ve been letting this one marinate for a bit BUT: reader who gets together with Taigen to spite Mizu who won’t get serious for reader. Cue the jealousy, club shenanigans, and poet mizu (!!)
boyfriend by dove cameron for max brainrot
———
Taigen was a fine boyfriend. All things considered. He was better than most of the guys you’d been with before, and he had a motorcycle that he’d let you take pics with and post them on your feed.
But, he wasn’t Mizu.
This point had been made several times. Mostly on Taigen’s end. His constant whining of I see the way you look at her, god I bet you thought I was a woman huh, better yet—you wished I was her huh!
He wasn’t wrong, necessarily. It wasn’t your fault you’d gotten bored and decided to go to Taigen’s fencing practice. It wasn’t like you’d intended on falling head over heels for the hot butch lesbian who had a mean smirk and a sweaty jaw when she whooped Taigen’s ass.
You still remembered the way she had her neck bared, her hair falling over her shoulders, the beat of her heart nestled in between her collarbones, the dark green of her veins under her skin.
So, yeah, maybe you did have a thing for Mizu, who may or may not be your boyfriend’s biggest rival.
Heavy quotations on the rival part since Mizu didn’t give a shit that Taigen hated her—in fact, she didn’t care that the majority of the lesbians, bisexual, and bi-curious girls on campus hated her guts.
But that was what made her interesting.
You’d thought about it often: her, telling you to leave as soon as you’d come on her tongue or strap or fingers, (whatever was fine, you weren’t picky.) and you’d feel that tug in your tummy and your jaw would relax and fall open and—
“hah, did you come?”
And then you’d be back where you started: dating Taigen and fucking him and not being able to enjoy it or come or anything.
The thing was this: You’d only ever been in long-term relationships. Never dabbled in casual one night stands that Mizu was rumored to stick by. Even if you did want her, her time was limited. And you didn’t exactly love sharing.
So, when Taigen complained about having to go out this weekend to “bond or some teammate trust building shit, pfft, as if we aren’t trying to kill each other every practice. Not to mention Mizu will be there,” You convinced him to go, and for you to tag along. As moral support of course.
Now as much as Taigen loved telling you how much he hated Mizu, he liked coming to the thought of her much more. You’d done it quite often, bring Mizu up in sex, the way she’d fence and made him look like a fucking loser. How good she’d look kissing you, having you, taking you away from him. You’d both come then, not just him.
So you supposed it wasn’t that weird to be crushing over Mizu. Especially when the weekend came and the alcohol was sweet and fizzy and the wine dark and bitter, and the club lights shimmering on Mizu’s skin, her hair, her hands as she came up behind you.
“Hey.” She said. Simple, easy, confident. Her hands brushed your exposed back, the bend of your hip, the jut of your ribs.
“Hi.” You said. Sultry, warm, quiet so she’d have to twist closer to hear you when you gasped as she held your waist, tighter this time. A little mean, “I have a boyfriend.”
And she’d chuckle, and pull away and quirk her dark eyebrow up, “Really? Him?” A barely there glance at Taigen who was with the other fencing team members taking body shots off one another, “I could be a better boyfriend than him, you know.”
She spun you around, the steady heat of her palm always on you, “You know me.” It wasn’t a question. You saw the way Mizu’s eyes dragged across your body on her way over, her tongue on her lips as she stared. She knew you were Taigen’s girlfriend.
“Been watching.” She brought you closer, shifted her hands and then you were close. Closer than you’d ever been to her before.
She smelled heady and like pinewood. The plane of her chest was defined, sturdy, and you wondered if she had small breasts, if they were sensitive.
“Can’t believe I almost went home when you’re here—all alone.” She smirked, the same damned smirk you’d replay in your mind as you masturbated and thought of her, “Think I might just steal you from him, hm?”
Her hands slipped up your back, to the bottom of your nape, a demanding grip: there one second, gone the next. She watched your face, your lips, your neck.
“Does this usually work on other girls?”
You pushed away then, your legs wobbly and your underwear damp. You wanted, but you knew exactly what Mizu thought of you: an easy thing, something of Taigen’s. Good for a night, forgotten the next.
So you straightened your clothes, and met Mizu’s confused gaze, “I have a boyfriend.”
Mizu’s mouth twitched. Barely. But you’d caught it as you turned, and headed to the bartop. Even if Mizu was who you’d wanted, being a one-night stand wasn’t what you wanted.
So, you walked back over to Taigen, beers in hand, and watched Mizu as you kissed him wide and dirty. Her glare a steely weight in your belly, and on your beating cunt.
You’d make Mizu yours, one way or another.
——-
Let’s make this a 2 parter. Poet mizu will have to wait. Thanks for the ask :)
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kittyscupcakeandbunny · 6 months
Text
CRAZY OVER YOU x MIN YOONGI
[HYBRID AU]
PART FOUR II
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The truth untold
Side Characters: Namjoon/doctor, Seokjin/doctor, Taehyung/Hybrid Tiger, Jungkook/Bunny Hybrid, Hoseok/assistant, new character/Snake Hybrid, new character/unknown hybrid.
Warnings: Smut, mentions of blood, sharp objects, rut, beast behavior, yandere yoongi, possessive behavior, angst.
Genre: Fantasy, hybrids au, smut.
SUMMARY》 Yoongi is a black mamba hybrid one of rarest species of hybrids, who’s about to be put down due to his lack of interest in living. But everything changes after the new medical assistance (y/n) takes a liking to him. Meeting after meeting he realise his feelings for her are not the only thing growing.
< Previously Next Chapter >
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In the books they say black mambas have a distinct mating ritual and the males would even fight for the right to mate when a suitable female mate has been found, a common behavior among the snake hybrids we notice was that no matter the species the males would make a nest to Impress the female a sign he was ready to begin the mating ritual with her. Along the years was believed that behavior stared between hybrids since they no longer could fight for the female’s attention, so far nothing told us otherwise.
So far Yoongi has been presenting signs of heat, although I was sure of it it was all down the line once he told he in fact had no heat. Studies had shown that not all snakes hybrids had heat indeed but, it was so unusual to find one who fit in that category we never once thought Yoongi could be like one of those.
That could only mean everything we knew about him was wrong and by proceeding with a put down procedure the entire clinic could get In trouble for negligence of the hybrids care, as bad as it may be it was a good chance for making the higher ups cancel the procedure, that way Yoongi will be able to be treated the right way and live.
I couldn’t help but feel a bit of hope bloom inside me, helping on Yoongis recover as now my biggest priority even though i had grew more than just a few feelings for him through this days we seen each other i must put them aside and focus on the matter at hand. Those are the thoughts on my mind as i push him slightly away, Interrupted by the sound of my cellphone ringing.
- let me take this… - I said stoping the kiss, he looked at me with heavy eyes but didn’t let me go.
Hands still holding tightly my waist as I breathless took my phone from my pocket, clearing my throat as i see Jin’s name on the caller. He must’ve had arrived already.
- yes? - I began taking the call.
- hey yn, i arrived already, just left Yoongis room and I sanded some cleaners to fix everything it should be done by the time you’re over with his bath i think - he said, before pausing a long sight leaves his mouth - I’m sorry about it all, can we talk once you’re done?
I couldn’t stay angry at Jin for much longer, i knew better that his father must’ve had passed the order for Yoongis prescription and keeping in mind how his father the director really didn’t care if he lived or died anymore I shouldn’t have lashed out on Jin either.
- of course Jin, we should discuss some other things too - i tell him, meaning we must do something about this whole situ at hand with Yoongi.
- I’ll wait for you in my office then, see you - he said.
- see you Jin.
I turned off the call staring up at the hybrid in front of me, he had a curious look on his face still racing my back with his fingers. I took in all of him for one last time every little detail on his face feeling his warm body so close to mine before i release myself from his embrace. Walking back to the closet i get him some clean clothes setting them over the table i turned back to the hybrid.
- you should get change now, we’ll head back to your room - i tell him - Jin told me it should be back to normal by now.
- you’re always leaving me for that director - Yoongi mumbled behind me.
- what? - I turned back to him handing him the clothes.
I watched as he folded them into his own hands, never looking at me as he chooses what piece to wear first a pout forming over his lips. Ever since we meet i notice how he seemed to slowly get closer and more comfortable around me, the more i tried not to think about much of how possessive he seemed to become the more clingy he showed himself to be. I knew this wasn’t the right thing to do, by giving in this burning feeling growing inside my chest i could put him in danger a well as my career here at the clinic. I have been irresponsible this entire time but things need to change from now, my own hormones some how have disrupted this behavior on him as he said himself not long ago before we both make the choice to give in. He didn’t have a fault in all of this, after all he’s just a hybrid it is completely normal for them if they are put in such situations but, I shouldn’t have let that happen. As his doctor it is my responsibility to take care of him and I failed miserably at it, relationships with a patient are completely forbidden.
I can’t keep doing this to Yoongi anymore, i must draw the line now before is too late. Soon he will meet someone like him and probably forget about all of this between us anyway, i just need to save him.
A long sight left my lips before i turn back as h dressed himself.
- i need to discuss with Jin about he stimulants - i said, hearing the sound of clothes - that’s all.
- just that? - he said, still mumbling the words.
I could hear the pout on his lips as he said it, a small smile forming on my own lips. For the smallest second i let myself forget about all of my responsibilities, letting that feeling of warmth sink in my chest. Yoongi never wanted me with anyone else but him at the clinic i liked that, to have someone want you so desperately but that was his instincts. It was a normal behavior for them to feel protective of their partner. For them any other male presence meant a risk of losing their partner, acting out was a normal way to express that they cared.
Ever since he opened up about his feelings and my presence seemed to be getting his own hormones disrupted by mine, things were a lot more clear to me. That wasn’t him, just an instinct.
All because i failed miserably to keep my distance.
- why? - i asked him.
- it would mean I have to fight for your attention - he said, this time closer to me.
His words had a lot more meaning to it then i wanted them to, i had no doubt he meant every single one of them. Its common for snake hybrids to fight for their potential partner to mate if they are dared to by another male, Yoongi must’ve had interpreted Jin’s presence as a threat and certainly mistook my presence as a female in heat. It is much uncommon for it to happened, I myself never saw a hybrid mate with a human before it was so unrealistic too, none of my coworkers had said anything about it in all the years I’ve been working here. It really did made me believe that this was all my own fault, a hybrid mating with a human never happened before.
There was never a possibility for such thing to happened, hybrids and humans never showed any signs of attraction for each other before there was no scientifical background done above that.
Why would Yoongi even be able to sense my hormones was still something I can’t understand, it’s such an unusual possibility I can’t bearly begin to make sense of it. I couldn’t help but feel guilt about it, my presence was just like the heat stimulants for him. Nothing good comes from side effects. I can’t keep doing that to him.
- you don’t have to fight for my attention - i tell him.
He took a deep breath before walking back to me closing the distance between us, I immediately took a set back and he eyed me up and down at my sudden reaction.
- you… - he scoffed - you’re really driving me crazy.
- its not my intention, sorry.
My words had more meaning then i intended too, it was too soon but i had to begin drawing the lines between us. Now with JIn so close to his appointments especially, it will be better for him since he will soon be able to meet his potential mate partner and as much as it might bother me to stand behind those lines I shouldn’t have crossed before, i must carry on my duties as his doctor only. There is no space for love or any sort of feelings between us, our worlds are completely different from one another. This was never supposed to happen anyway.
The walk back to his room was quiet, no one dared to say a word and the space between us was thicker the the silence around us. It was almost to much to bare, having him so close yet so far away I didn’t know if he already had somehow caught on my sudden change as we walked through the long white corridors, he never said anything. I knew some time i would have to tell him this wouldn’t happen between us again but, i kept praying he would just run for the other female without saying anything. Even if it hurts, i just thought it would be better for him to carry on without me.
From time to time I would catch him smirking at me, he would look at me up and down as he walked slowly behind me, not being able to control my own heart feeling the heat rising up to my face blushing hot at his stare each time, he made sure to walk close to me the entire time sometimes bumping into me.
For the time being i would jut ignore it, until its the right time to tell him the truth and put that line between us once and for all.
Once we finally reached his floor through the elevators we made our way to his room, as we got closer i notice someone standing in front of the door to his room soon realizing from the looks it was Hoseok who stood there. He looked up at us a worried expression on his face slowly turning into an angry one as his eyes fall over Yoongis figure behind me.
- why is he not in a collar? - Hoseok spat, not giving me a chance o speak first.
- stop it - I warned him, a sight leaving my lips feeling Yoongi getting closer behind me a protective hand closing around my wrist.
- you’ve been walking around with him like this, without a collar? - he said, a baffled chuckle leaving his lips - after all that happened this morning!?
- yes and he didn’t bite anyone - I tell him, bitting my lip angrily - honestly Hoseok I’m tired of you all misinterpret him.
- now you’re defending him?! - he spat, walking closer to me making Yoongi quickly push me back and taking the front standing between me and Hoseok.
Both males stared down at each other, the sight made me feel a mixture of anxiety and guilty. Knowing Yoongi was only acting out of instinct because he misunderstood completely our feelings, this was just another reminder of why i should’ve been drawing the lines between us.
- I don’t have time for this, I need to talk with Jin about this whole situation - I quickly interrupted, getting myself between both of them i took Yoongis arm into my hand.
- I’ll go with you then - Hoseok said, resting over the wall beside the door.
This wasn’t exactly how I wanted to clear things out with Jin about Yoongi, it was personal and I didn’t wanted to have Hoseok knowing anything especially with his sudden attitude now. Seeing as he wouldn’t move anytime soon i only sighted taking Yoongi back to his room, i closed the door behind us once we were inside alone. Taking a quick look around the room seeing as everything was indeed cleaned up and fixed, the bed in the center as usual and neatly done as well as the small table beside and the only closet in the corner.
He would be able to make a new nest now and rest knowing no more meds would have such drastic effect over him again, i saw how he looked around probably already thinking about it as well.
Any signs from earlier events were all cleaned and I could only sight in relief quickly making my way to the closets over the right wall getting a few more covers from it and putting over the bed, feeling the sharp eyes of the snake hybrid over me as i moved around the room once i though it was enough for him i turned back to him who stood close by the bed watching with curious dark eyes.
- i thought you might want this, for a new nest - I tell him.
I don’t know what about this sentence that makes him blush so hard, he looks so adorable like that. I take in a mental picture of this look, soon i won’t be seeing him like that anymore but i shake off any bitter feelings from it. Treasuring this small moment, he mumbles a “thank you” and i begin to make my way out.
- I’ll be back later - I tel him before leaving.
Not looking back as i did so, the door felt heavier then it ever did. After everything that happened I couldn’t hold back the switch i felt once i made the decision, like that line was already drawn between us and he just didn’t know yet.
I took a deep breath after closing it completely, Hoseok presence beside me was a heavy cold bucket of water. I couldn’t blame him for his reaction, everyone seemed to be a little sensitive lately especially since all the events this morning. Safety protocols exist for a reason and as much as i hated to admit, it was wrong of me for taking Yoongi out without a collar on I shouldn’t have risked more even, essa especially when it had not been too long since he was acting that way.
- shall we? - he said, impatiently.
I only nodded letting him lead the way, guilty was weighing over me more then it ever did.
I knew Hoseok wasn’t happy with my decisions lately, he always been a brother to me and deep down he was just worried for me. I wasn’t exactly the smarted when it came to helping the hybrids, no matter how aggressive they would get i would always make sure to get the job done. There was not a single hybrid I treated that was continuously aggressive once i treated them, it is not their fault to act that way, after all, most of the times they are acting out of fear of getting hurt. Most doctors here don’t even try to get close to them when they are in such state, but I didn’t really liked letting the security handle them whenever those things happened. Just like the tiger hybrid was brought here, I made the mistake of using a small dose of tranquilizer and got hurt. Things like that can happen to any one here, that was why I always took charge of them. Deep down i knew i was part of the small portion of people here who truly wasn’t afraid of them.
Things can get ugly at any time, i wanted Hoseok to know that and stop being so angry about it with me because of it. He always seemed to think of me as a weak person, i got hurt and went back to work that’s how it always had been but lately he just seemed to be over reacting every time.
By the time we got in Jin’s office, the tension between us was thick enough to be cut in the middle with a knife as we both sat quietly in front of seokjins desk, the three of us only stared at each other for a couple of minutes after we got here no one even said a word.
Knowing Jin he was probably trying to figure out what had happened in the meantime for us to be in such situation, his eyes going back and forth between us. Hoseok was ready to set everything over the table, from the way he was heavily breathing beside me i could tell he was still angry at me.
- well… - Jin began, cleaning his throat.
- should i start? - i said, feeling the man beside me burn even more.
- please do - Hoseok spat, turning to me with anger over his eyes.
I swallowed hard, I’ve never been under this stare of his. It definitely pained me more then i wished it did. I took a deep breath before I start.
- I understand Yoongis behavior this morning was not one of the bests…. - I said, making Hoseok scoff beside me.
- yes, we talked over the phone about it for a bit - Jin commented.
- and we came to the conclusion that, such dose of heat stimulants could have side effects… - I said - after talking with Yoongi it was clear to me that this dose everyday was making him sick to the point he was so uncomfortable it made him lose control today.
- I understand - Jin said - I already made a few calls and since you commented before he’s been giving signs of heat they called off completely the meds.
At the mention of his heat Yoongis words went through my mind again, his sudden confession for not heaving a heat was something we had to discuss now. It might also be the cause to his side effects from taking the heat stimulants, when hybrids used to be put under the drugs they should give signs of heat as soon as they take the first dose but Yoongi only started to give signs lately under a big dose. All could only tell he wasn’t being affected even the slightest bit positive by the drugs because there was no heat happening to begin with, which could only resolve in a bad side effect.
- he’s not in heat - I stated, finally bringing a surprise reaction from Jin.
- what? - Jin nervously asked, a chuckle leaving his lips as if not believing me.
- i talked to him about it today, he told me he doesn’t go into heat - I explain - from what I can tell, he only mates to reproduce but we should take new exams to make sure.
There is a moment of silence between us three, Jin seems to be deep in thought probably going over everything to make a conclusion out of this. As much as it could help Yoongis situation, him not having heat meant more exams would have to be taking on him which would only trouble the procedures for his mating and we would need the directors approval first. He could state it is not necessary and we wouldn’t be able to do anything and Yoongi would still have to be put under the drugs again, if Jin convince his father we might be able to save him.
The information he gave us would be crucial to stop his put down, even thought it was just a hybrids heat cycle it would meant the director wouldn’t have much choice but proceed with new exams and procedures for Yoongi and depending on his results he wouldn’t have to be put down anymore.
I felt hope growing inside my chest at the thought of it
- I know you’re thinking what I’m thinking Jin - i tell him, immediately capturing his attention. There was a small smile over his lips as he looked over me.
- I’ll talk with the director and get the permission immediately - he said - it’ll take some time and we must take the exams first, by the time he has to meet the female snake we should have it all settle though.
- wait - Hoseok interrupted - so what does all of his weird behaviors come from?
- probably side effects of the drug hes been taking - i said, keeping short Hoseok wasn’t from the same unit as me things like this were unusual for him - hell be clean from it by Monday.
- yes….- Jin sighted - I understand my mistake and it seems y/n has a way with him no one here does so, I trust you to keep taking good care of him.
- as long as she fallows the protocols - Hoseok said.
- what is this about now? - Jin asked.
- I took him to bath and brought him back without a collar - I said honestly.
- y/n…. You’ll give me grey hairs - Jin said holding his temple - please fallow the protocols, i understand but…
- I will, sorry -I tell him - can we talk alone for a moment Jin?
- oh, yes - Jin looks over to me - what is it?
I wait until Hoseok leaves before i tuner my focus back to Jin, the time until were finally alone i kept thinking and rethinking how to even begin with all of this.
- so what is it y/n, you seem a bit worried? - Jin said, getting up from his seat in front of me to take the one were Hoseok sat before.
- It’s just, this whole situation with Yoongi and what he told me about not having a heat - i began - I can’t help but think that, everything we knew about him was wrong and by proceeding with this procedure the entire clinic could get in trouble for negligence of the hybrids care.
- I know, i was thinking about this too - he said - to be honest with you y/n i notice that after reading his old documents, Yoongi has been indeed been mistreated.
His words immediately stole my breath away. This was much more then i thought it was, it made me question more and more if all this time his behavior wasn’t just an act of rebellion on the clinic but rather tiredness and anger from being treated wrongly this whole time. While everyone thought of him as an asshole, he only acted that way because people have been unfair towards him. That made my blood boil.
- It’s been that way since he was brought here - Jin stated, a sight leaving his lips - i only recently found out about it, not much exams were taken of him for his well being but for scientific purposes. They’ve been testing on him for years until he became… well the hybrid we know now.
- Jin… - I helpless said - what are you telling me now?
- You know exactly what I’m saying…. - i could see his eyes shining like never before - trust me, no one hates this more then me right now.
He had tears older his eyes before he quickly got up and walk back to his desk, Jin hated to be seen like that and it took me a few seconds to realize the meaning under his sudden confession.
They don’t intend to save Yoongi no matter what, its all a set up to hide what they have been doing all this years to him.
- i wont give up that easily - i stated to him - tell your father i said that.
- I won’t either y/n - he said, i could see the determination under his features and that encouraged me even more.
- lets get things right with Yoongi first, before his meeting with the female hybrid - i tell him.
- I’ll take care of it immediately y/n, I’m running a few call already things should start soon.
- ok.
I got up from the seat and made my way to leave.
I could bearly begin to digest all the information that Jin just told me, I couldn’t believe such thing was happening right under my nose at the clinic. All of those years he’s been enduring god knows how many testes done to him without his consent, the more I thought about the more i began to think that maybe the guy he bit that time deserved all of it.
His behavior started to make more sense to me, this whole time he was in defensive mode, even with me. Just like the tiger hybrid i treated that day, Yoongi was also been through so much and he never had a chance to stop it.
I couldn’t help but think about his words, “please, tell me you’re not one of them”. At that time it didn’t made much sense to me but now, feeling this heavy weight on my chest the burning sensation under my eyes.
By the time i left Jin’s office i was bitting into my lip to hold my sobs from leaving my mouth, once i was inside the elevator i could bearly hold it back. It just pained me so much to know it, how hurt he must been all of this years all alone. No one knew it and the ones who did knew never said anything, not did they ever tried to help him.
I didn’t know what to do with all of this information, i just knew that now more then ever i wanted to be with him. After all of this time i was the only one Yoongi didn’t felt threatened by and finally i could understand what he meant all this time, before i could clear things out with him i had to pull myself together. There was more to do then i thought, I don’t have time to cry now i had to save him. I never leave any patient behind, I won’t leave him too.
Feeling the anger dripping out my skin I began to hate even the walls of the clinic and everyone here, anger boiling over me at Jin’s father for allowing all of this to happen and then just try to cover it all with all this stupid procedure but still force him to mate just to keep doing those experiments with another hybrid, i doubt they would wait for the hybrid to even grow up before they begin.
When the door of the elevator opened I made my way through the corridor without a single thought in mind, soon stoping in front of the door i put on the code to get in.
My body is hit by the hot temperature wave of his room already used to it by know, my hands are shaking by my sides once I see him already in his bed. I could tell from the looks over the messy bed he had already done a nest on it, sitting down over the mess of covers he looks up to me as i make my way towards him not wasting a second. He had a smile over his soft features but, quickly turning into a confused expression once he took in how i looked.
I don’t blame him, my face probably looked much puffier now since I’ve been crying on the elevators till i got here. I felt sick of it all, just for that moment i wanted to be just us not a doctor and a patient. Not a hybrid and a human. Just us.
Without thinking twice i took his hand in mine pulling him up as i close my arms around his neck, bitting into my lower lip to hold more tears from falling as i take in his smell.
How could they do this to him?
- what happened y/n? - he softly asked into my neck, arms closing around me just as strong as i held into him.
- I’m not one of them - i mumbled - I’m not like them…
As the words spilled from my mouth i held him tighter on my arms, noticing how his whole body went stiff realizing i knew everything. He tried to lean back but i only held him tighter, i couldn’t look into his face now i would only brake into tears if i did so, not being able to see anything but all the things they might have done to him.
He didn’t push me away after that, we kept ourselves like that for a while until he moved slightly away but I didn’t look into his face yet keeping my eyes over his exposed collar bones.
- you know…. - he began - y/n, please don’t cry I’m fine now.
- no… don’t say that - I murmured - Yoongi they’ll…
I stoped immediately from continuing, I didn’t know if now was the best moment to tell him the truth for all of this. I could bearly even say it out loud what would happen to him.
- what did they to you?
My voice was bearly a whisper, i couldn’t take that thought out of my mind. Why would they do such thing to him?
For another moment we didn’t spoke any words, he held me against him as he began to walk backwards till he reached to bed pulling myself with him as he sat down over it keeping me on his lap as his hands traced my back.
- it doesn’t matter what they did to me y/n…. - he whispered, hand holding my chin up to meet his face - i have you now, its more then I could ever ask for.
- dont say that… I’m not what you need - i tell him.
- but i want you - he said, his words sanding a chill down my spine - you should know that.
I wanted to tell him he was wrong, the was just the hormones speaking. That he needed was in fact the female hybrid and not me, a mare human. Another reason for us to not be together like this anymore, but just for today i allowed myself to be selfish again for just one more time I’ll stay in his arms.
[…]
Things didn’t got much brighter after that. I wished they did but it wasn’t that easy, Jin has been in a meeting with his father over the phone the entire morning to discuss about Yoongis future. He only told me he would be busy with that before the meeting started to inform me that he wouldn’t be able to participate in todays procedures with Yoongi, things were not exactly easy since his father was the one behind everything. Much later i found out Jin left the clinic to talk personally with his father, i began to worry even more about it.
I tried not to let show as i continued to work, when i left Yoongis room after barging in crying i had set in my mind that i would do everything to save him. If i have to give up on us to save him, i will. If someone mistreat him again I’ll put them on their place immediately, this is supposed to be a clinic to save and help hybrids recover not some crazy lab to experiment on those pure beings. They have been through enough already.
Since Namjoon was in charge of the treatment of the female hybrid i was the one in charge of checking their new room were they would be able to meet for the first time and began the mating process, as every hybrid have their own unique traits a separate space is created to accommodate their needs during matings to ensure a safe environment for both as they go through an important transition with their partner.
We had a few hybrids already in mating process, rehabilitation sometimes take longer for them and we cannot put them immediately into mating process as that can also make it harder for them to chose a partner. Our first priority is their safety and well being no matter what.
With Yoongis case I didn’t felt any different in that matter and the fact that this entire procedure to make him mate in the hopes that the clinic can keep his specie alive made me sick, if he was sick it would been a complete different scenario but since his healthy and the only side effect is his skin condition it doesn’t sit right with me to carry on this assignment, knowing the entire truth about the director and the things the clinic made him go through all this years kept making my stomach turn back and forth. I felt more inclined to save him even more now, no matter what.
The seventh floor was were the mating rooms were at, once i got there I quickly made my way towards the room assigned for Yoongi. The identification for it was YK10391Q, looking over the identifications on each door as i walked down the long white corridor it was separated by alphabetical order and his was on the few last ones. Every room had a separate entrance to a small room beside theirs were we usually stay to make sure the hybrids are well while they mate, everything is monitored by a medical team and the hybrids doctor on the first days before they began mating in case any problems occur. Anything can happen while they are alone there, in the past cases a few hybrids got a bit overwhelmed and ended up hurting their mate pretty badly and had to be quickly separated. They are given the privacy needed for their mating process but we always ensure everything is safe for them to enjoy such precious moment together. Nobody watches them but if something happens we must be there to assist them.
Yoongis room wasn’t much different from his right now, the temperature was high enough to make them comfortable and the lights were not as bright since their vision is very sensitive. There was a round bed in a corner covered with white heavy covers, on the other side close to it was a small bath tub still being installed.
- miss. Yn - said a male voice behind me.
I quickly turned noticing a man with a few papers in hand entering the room, he wore a yellow cap and by his uniform he must the one in charge of the design of the the room.
- hello sir.
- are you here to check the room of the patient doctor? - he asked.
- yes, are you the one in charge?
- I’m doctor, is everything to your liking? - he said while making his way towards the bathtub.
I took another glance around.
- the temperature is good as well as the lights here but, it’ll need more covers on the bed for a nest and could change the sheets for some silk, he has very sensitive skin it could be a little irritating for him - i said watching the man take a few notes.
- that wont be a problem miss, something else?
- ah yes, this bathtub how is going to be?
- just simple with a system for hot water and there will be put a small water fall in that corner as well as some lavender plants around, doctor Namjoon requested for the female since it helps her calm down.
- that’s good then - i tell him - for now that’s all i have in mind, when will it be done?
- it should be all done by today.
- okay, thank you.
With that i left the room.
We would be able to move Yoongi to the mating room today then, that was good since his mating would began on Monday. With him being able to be in his new room before anything we could still rearrange anything he might need.
Checking the clock on the elevator as i made my way to the first floor, seeing as i still had time before Yoongis lunch so i made the decision to check my patients before. Some normal and non eventful duties to clear my mind now is what i needed to get back in track.
I decided to check back on the tiger hybrid from yesterday, it hasn’t been a long time since i saw him so i should check his exams before making anymore procedures with him.
I took his files from the exam room noticing a few people were there a the moment, I complimented them before taking the files i needed and leaving for the hybrids room.
[…]
Yoongi - POV
I could still smell her scent on my clothes, ever since she left to continue her duties at the clinic after telling me she now knew everything. Part of me wished she didn’t know that, another small part of me was happy someone finally knew what they did to me and the fact that it was her brought some comfort to me but at the same time I couldn’t help but wonder if behind all of that she just pitted me.
No one has ever been this kind and understanding of me my whole existence, i was put on testes ever since I learned how to walk. They would take pieces of my skin, draw blood of me all the damn time. Not to mention the pain every time they tied me up in that bed to use chemicals on me, trying to test my scale’s capabilities of endurance, regeneration and so on. It became so much i could bearly eat anymore, it hasn’t been much long since they had finally stoped those tests.
Things felt different ever since these two new doctors began treating me, i never had a female doctor before. Never new why. She was the first one to treat me and I couldn’t help but feel embraced by her presence every time she comes in.
I had always hated the males in this clinic, they never showed me kindness even when i was a child. I wondered if all this time I wasn’t assigned a famele doctor on purpose, just to be mistreated by those men on purpose.
For all those years i had been in survival mode, leaning to adapt to stay alive but things seemed to have changed since yn came here. These two were not treating me for no reason, after being left alone to rot in here for so long their sudden appearance was not goin g unnoticed by me. I knew that she was hidden something from me, but Yn wasn’t like the other she would tell me when the time is right. I know she will.
Looking up at the dark ceiling of my room feeling the warm temperature surrounding me softly, touching my body through the silk. My skin felt so much better now with yn baths, for a long time i had simply given up on my shadding but I couldn’t do that anymore.
I had to look good for her, it was a given how fast i could heal my body. No one knew about that, even after all the tests they had put me under i still manage to hide everything about me from them. There was still a few things i had to hide from yn as well, i dont know how much longer i can keep this up though.
No wonder all those males doctors are always surrounding her all the damn time, her scent seemed to be all over the room even after she left. It continued to drive me completely insane, I wondered for how much longer will i have to keep this up with all the mating process she wants me to go through before i can finally take her.
I have a feeling those males she calls friends are trying to test my patience, not only do i have to worry about them but her other patients. That bunny was really asking to be eaten alive when he scented her, the more I thought about such thing happening the more anger boiled over me.
Did she liked that? How was he touching her? Is that the kind of hybrid she likes?
How dare her test me like this, i could feel my entire body vibrates with rage again. But quickly brushed off the best i could. I was lucky about the heat stimulants the first time, if i lash out again today i dont know how ill be able to get myself out of it again.
I hated to lie to her but, since she was also hiding things from me it was only fair.
Spreading myself over the soft surface of my new nest i let the warm temperature embrace by body comforting me into a deep thought.
- y/n…
Her name left my lips like honey, i could stil taste her from this morning.
It didn’t seem to be the right choice to mate with her but, after spending time with her and being around her I didn’t care if it wasn’t right anymore whenever I was with her every cell in my body called for her. After tasting her I knew she was ready for me, her scent was dripping from every inch on her skin a silent call for me to be with her only I could sense it.
She’s been considerate enough to get more covers four nest, I couldn’t believe when she did that. No one has ever asked for me to make a nest before, y/n was the one I wanted my mind wouldn’t change about that.
I needed her so desperately, I can’t take anymore crumbs from her. I need to feel her skin completely, every centimeter of her same beautiful body against mine. Her soft breaths as she can bearly hold heel self form the pleasure.
Spreading my arms above my head as the image of her beautiful face filled my mind, the ghost of her fingers around my neck were enough to make me go insane.
Even the silk covering my skin was unbearable in that moment, a feeling of numbness in my mind as her scent kept filling my lunges. I bite into my bottom lip tasting my own poison as I harshly ripped open my shirt, not being able to even control my movements any longer. Lifting it up to my nose to feel her scent better, it was so sweet i wanted to cry.
Hips moving up and down the more i thought about her body against mine this morning, how breathless she was under my touch, how delicate her skin feels.
I let that thought drive me completely out of my sanity in that dark room again.
[…]
Y/n - POV
By the time I was done checking on Jungkook the bunny hybrid again, i was restlessly making my way to the kitchen to get Yoongis meal. Jin didn’t call me but sanded a massage instead telling me to carry on the assignments without him. Nothing else, no words were needed anyway. I knew he was still talking with his father trying his best to convince him about Yoongi, i sighted watchim his food being prepared this was taking much longer then I thought it would. I just hope he gets in his father head to make the right decision for Yoongi, after all those years he deserves to be treated the right way.
I thanked the lady after she hands me the silver tray with Yoongis food, quickly making my way to his floor. I notice this time the food wasn’t just fruits but some nicely cut kimbab, the fact that they starved him all this years was a pinch to my heart. But now things will slowly start to go back to their right way, usually all the hybrids eat together at the cafeteria with a few exceptions for especial cases as we always ensure their safety and let them socialize with each other which is just as important for them. You can’t just lock them up in their rooms till they are fully recovered.
As i watched the numbers on the elevator go up i felt my phone vibrating in my pocket and carefully reach for it with one hand, seeing a massage from one of my colleagues informing that Yoongis mating room was all set. A sight of relief left my lips, thankfully I’ll be able to set Yoongi on his room before Monday. Since tomorrow is my rest day i won’t be working and will only be at the clinic Monday, the fact that I’ll be able to take him to his room brought some comfort to my mind. I didn’t wanted anything to happen while I wasn’t here and knowing Yoongi didn’t felt comfortable around the other doctor was not a thought that brought a pleasant feeling at all. Especially now that I know more about what happened to him, i felt even more protective of him. Not knowing if they would care for him nicely or continue to mistreat him.
Once the door of the elevator opened at his floor I quickly made my way through the long corridor toward his room, i had so much going on in my mind I didn’t know where to start with it. I knew i wanted to do but if Jin’s father don’t agree with us i could lose Yoongi forever, that thought was not the most pleasant to bear. I didn’t know what i was capable of doing if that ever happen, it didn’t help my nerves how Jin hasn’t returned any of my calls or massages.
For now i must carry on with Yoongis appointment as if nothing happened, until i can tell him the truth. He’s aware of the fact that i know what happened to him at the clinic, trying to carry on now as if I didn’t know or nothing happen was not what i wanted too.
With a long sight i opened the door to his room, ready to continue with this till the end whatever it might take to save him.
As the door closed behind me i waited until all the lights of the room were back on, felling the hot temperature of the room immediately embrace my entire body cold from the air outside. Walking closer to his bed were seeing as he was laying down upon noticing my presence he slowly lifted his upper body up.
Dark eyes staring into mine tiredly, almost immediately making my heart skip a beat.
I stared at him confused seeing his shirt ripped open on his body, exposing his chest completely as he just looked up at me with dark glossy eyes. I never saw such look on his face before, his eyes never looked so dark that his entire pupil was almost covering his entire eye, his chest moved up and down fast, sweat dripping down from his neck the ends of his hair wet from it.
I carefully placed the tray on the table over the side before quickly making my way towards the small cabinet on the right. Taking a new shirt and a towel with me stoping beside him, he slowly sits up completely as i begin to dry some of the sweat on his neck.
- did something happened, you look… bad? - i ask him carefully, worry filling every muscle in my body.
- I’m fine… - he mumbles, taking the towel from my hands to dry his face.
- are you sure?
- yes, y/n - he said, turning towards me as he takes of the shirt to replace for the new one i had in my hands - its just hot… can i have some water?
- oh, of course - I quickly got up to take the cup with water on his tray, turning around back to give him it.
He drank the water in big gulps, chest moving up and down faster as he finish it holding the glass over his knee as he looked down. I notice his eyes were slowly going back, still dark like a night sky but not like before. I sit back beside him, taking the glass from his hand to put it on the floor as I watched his motions. He looked exhausted as if he had run a marathon, i wondered what might have happened while i was gone.
I didn’t like to see him like this, i knew it was time for me to began setting boundaries and lines between us but, when i saw him like that i couldn’t help how i felt.
- hey… Yoongi - I carefully brushed a strand of hair out his face, gasping as he suddenly leaned down over my shoulder resting his face on my neck.
- you smell so good today… - he groaned over my skin, one arm closing above my legs as he leaned more against me.
I immediately went under panicking, there was a moment to draw a line. Set some boundaries Y/n.
- i brought you some food - I quickly changed the topic, taking his arm from around my waist as i got up.
Cleaning my throat while i take the tray with food with me, sitting back beside him this time i put the tray between us to create some space. I noticed how he looked at it for a moment then back up at me.
- you can’t eat only fruits for the rest of your life - i tell him - so, to start small and simple some kimbab. It’s really good and healthy, its made with vegetables and some tuna rolled up on rice. Here try some, eat slowly so you dont get an upset stomach.
I held one roll up for him to take it, he carefully holds before his nose smelling it before he takes a small bit of it a few pieces falling over his chest in the process.
- oh, no… - I chuckled slightly at his face once he realizes the mess he made - you’re like a kid eating.
Out of habit i took a napkin quickly cleaning the new shirt i gave him from the sauce it dripping on it, leaning closer to him as i cleaned his chin. He watched me quietly, not moving an inch until i lean back clearing my throat.
- so do you like it? - i ask him, swallowing the nervousness back inside.
He just takes another roll and put the entire thing on his mouth, looking at the food between us. Redness rising over his checks as i looked at him astonished.
He never looked so nervous before, what it is happening right now?
Confused i filled another cup with water for him handing it towards him as he took it sill not looking my way, he swallowed the food before taking a big gulp of water.
- sorry… - he said, looking up at me - I’m just… feeling bit hungry now.
- oh - the sound came out of my lips more surprised then I intended to - well eat more then but, slowly this time.
He just nodded before taking another roll and biting into it. For a long moment he just eat slowly and quietly, our eyes would meet from time to time whenever he wanted more water.
- you’re not… - he said after some time - you won’t ask about what happened earlier?
- well, i know enough… to be honest Yoongi, i dont want to make you go through all of that again just to tell me.
He nodded. I took the tray from the bed putting it over the table, we still had som time before i have to go home.
- right, your knew room is ready - i tell him, turning back to him noticing he sat in a more comfortable way resting on his arms.
- knew room?
- all hybrids are put in a special room for the mating process - I explained.
- oh, right… that thing - his face seemed to darkened as he realized what i was talking about.
- we still have some time so i would like to take you there today - i tell him.
- does it have to be today?
- yes, I’m not… i dont work at the clinic tomorrow.
- you dont?
- no Sunday is my rest day, I wasn’t even supposed to be working this afternoon.
- oh, sorry for making you work more.
- this is nothing, - i tell him - besides i like being with you.
- you do?
I nodded giving him a small smile. He gave me another smile in return, looking more relaxed now.
After everything that happened this morning I knew better then to overstep the protocols again with Yoongi, since he didn’t have a good history I assumed he was put on Red code for his attacks although I knew he didn’t meant to hurt anyone he would still have to be put on a collar before going out. On a small compartment beside the hybrids door its their collar for when is needed, all red coded hybrids had it, quickly making my way there typing the code to open the compartment i took the small metal collar. Turning back to him as he slowly walked to me.
- lets go see your new room?
- i dont have much of a choice do i? - he mumbles once he stood in front of me.
His mention brought a sense of discomfort to me, he didn’t have any. And i hated that more then he could imagine.
- sorry…
I looked up at him, his sudden apology bringing my attention back to him as i closed the collar around his neck.
- dont be, you’re right…. - i sighted - i won’t let them hurt you anymore Yoongi. Know that.
I wanted to make sure he knew that. After all I was here to save him, the reason why I chose to be a hybrids doctor was to help this new specie that fell misunderstood by so many when it wasn’t even their fault.
Knowing Yoongis past made me feel uneasy, not for him but now I felt even more pressure to make sure he’s well. Just the thought of being like one of those people from his past that mistreated him so badly made me sick to my stomach.
In just a few days Yoongi managed to completely steal my heart for him, ever since I meet him I’ve been trying my best to ignore those feelings growing inside of my chest. But the closer we got to each other the more I couldn’t let go of him, today wasn’t any different.
- let’s go see your room then - I breathed out.
He gave me a small smile before I opened the door for us to leave. I didn’t felt comfortable having to put him in a collar again, everything just felt so unfair ever since Jin told me about his past in the clinic. I felt like I should be even more careful with him now.
My entire career was dedicated to help hybrids who have been mistreated and unwell, I knew that even though he seemed fine on the outside he must’ve not feel the same on the inside.
He walked close to me as we made our way down the hall towards the elevators, no one said a words as we walked letting the comfortable silence fill the air around us. I notice how we were the only ones on this floor for that moment, but weekends are usual like this and if no special call are made for rescued hybrids the whole day goes by calmly.
I was grateful for days like this at work, it meant the hybrids were well and that was all I wanted for them.
It didn’t took much longer for the doors to the elevators to opened to the seventh floor, I walked out being fallowed by Yoongi who grabbed the back of my coat as we made our way through the long corridor till his own room.
I swallowed nervously, every hour that went through was a clear reminder that my time with him was going to end. I know I needed to set the line between us and stop this before it gets out of hand, it was hard enough already and Yoongi didn’t make it any easier to me.
Now that all was left was a day before he meets the female snake hybrid, I felt even more uneasy knowing he will soon be with someone who’s just like him and can fulfill his needs better.
There is reason why hybrids and humans didn’t work out together and why there has never been a single case like this happening, hybrids can only mate with other hybrids even though they are half humans. We can’t sustain a connection with their hormones to reproduce, for that reason, they don’t feel attracted to us at all.
I couldn’t understand how Yoongi could tell I was ovulating or how that seemed to wake something on him but, it happened. I could already feel the heat growing on my checks the more I thought about. Was I so hot and bother by his male presence that I lost a bit of control?
Shaking this thoughts away as we finally stopped in front of the door to his new room, i quickly typed his code on the digital panel on the wall. Making my way inside the room as the door opened for us, the room now had the same light effect from his old one.
I closed the door behind us as the lights slowly began to turn up above us, it would stay turned off like he was used to but slightly shining on a more warm low tone to make the room more cozy for them.
I watched as he slowly began to walk around the room inspecting every corner of it, he first walked towards the bathtub on the right corner occupying almost the entire wall as a small water fall with lavender flowers and some blue ivy’s surrounded them, a bit of steam flowing up from the water as it continued to fill up indicating it was warm.
He then made his way towards the bed on the other side, checking the extra covers on it with his fingers.
This room wasn’t as big as his other one, but it was made sure that the bed was spacious enough for them as well as the bathtub I see now. I knew for a fact he would love that for sure.
- what do you think? - I ask him, making my way towards him - is there anything you don’t like? We can change it up for you.
- it’s… nice - he murmured, turned back to me.
- that’s good to hear - I tell him - if you feel like you might need something more, just tell me and I’ll get it ready for you.
- can I get you here? - he took another step in my way closing the distance between us.
- that’s not… I mean-
- you said anything? - he interrupted, turning his head slightly to the side furring his eyebrows as he stared at me with those dark orbs.
- I meant for the room, the… you know - I couldn’t form a single straight word as I kept looking into his eyes, heat washing up on my checks the more hi stared and a smirk lift his lips up.
He chuckled leaning towards me, making me immediately hold my breath. His eyes locked with mine as he held my chin between his fingers, thumb slightly brushing over my bottom lip.
I was once again completely under his spell, it was almost unfair how easily he could have me wrap around his finger with only a few touches and sweet nothings. For a hybrid he sure knew how to lure humans into him, but to say he was not attractive would be a lie.
Yoongi was without a doubt the most beautiful being I’ve ever seen in my life, it didn’t took a genius to see his beauty was something completely different then anything in this world, he looked dreamy in every way. Like the ocean beautiful and filled with mysteries.
Almost human looking if not for his beautiful scales over his neck that shined a mix of white and lilac like a pearl. Almost unnoticeable at how softly they were on his body, shining so beautifully under the lights making him look even more unreal. Some would think a black mamba snake hybrid shouldn’t look like this, Yoongi sure was one of the rarest specie we had in our clinic. Black mambas aren’t truly colored black as many would think, the animal name comes from the black colored inside of their mouths and eyes and their body is of a grayish color. You could tell the similarities on him from his eyes, black like the night sky and the soft gray of his scales that only shined a upon light. Yoongi had no warm tone on his body, were his skin wasn’t covered in grayish scales he was so pale some would think he was sick but that was just another thing that made him even more special.
I stoped him from leaning in more with my hand over his chest feeling how his breathing has quickened as it moved up and down under my hand, swallowing nervously as i looked up into his eyes. His expression didn’t change a bit at my movements, he licked his bottom lip before turning his head slightly to the other side bring his hand up to cover mine on his chest pushing down against him and stoping over his hip.
- let me bite you again - he said in a whisper immediately stealing my breath away.
- what?
- please… i don’t think i can do this anymore y/n - he murmured, as if he was in pain.
Before i could say anything he pulled me against his body complete with his other arm, circling around my waist burying his face on my neck a gasp leaves my lips as i feel his hand sliding up my back under my coat stoping at the back of my neck.
My own hands holding him by the arms trying to put some distance between us but failing completely, i tried again at the feeling of his fangs over the skin of my neck brushing over it every so slightly.
- please… i wont hurt you i promise - he whispered above my ear lips brushing against it.
- i don’t… i - no words would come out of my mind to make any sense of this.
The more I felt his hands all over me again, the more my body seemed to gave in his words. Every inch of skin he traced with his fingers left a path of heat on my skin that spread all over me, i could feel any sense i had left my mind the more he held me. Any ounce of regret completely washing out of me as his fangs danced over my neck right over where he bit me before.
I was ready to give in closing my arms around his neck as he did the same, holding me tightly burying his head deeper in my neck ready to leave another mark on it.
My body burned in anticipation but, all that heat was abruptly cooled down the second i heard the door opened and steps towards us.
As if an instinct I immediately pushed Yoongi away making him fall over the bed and he looked at me almost angrily, i gave him an apoplectic look before turning to the source who interrupted us so suddenly and I immediately felt my body froze at the sight of Jin right there.
- sorry, did I surprise you? - he asked confused.
- ah…yeah a little bit - i mumbled, swallowing nervously.
- well, my apologies if I interrupted your sentimental hug i need to talk with you y/n - he said, now sounding more serious.
- of, course - i turned to Yoongi who now seemed to be even more angry - if you need anything there is a button on the panel beside the door if you push it, it will immediately be directed to the service desk you can call for me or request anything you might need.
- yeah, whatever… - he mumbled not looking at me as he got up, walking past me towards the bathtub.
I just nodded and turned to Jin giving him a small smile as we made our way out of the room, i was thankful once again for Jin if he didn’t show up god knows were i would have end up in that room with him. Shit, he didn’t see anything right?
A sight left my lips once we were out of the room in the long white corridor of the seventh floor, i knew i had to get a hold of my emotions but gosh how difficult did Yoongi had to make things for me. How many times will he put me in such situations? Thankfully we were just holding each other and Jin only took it as a hug, i need to stop this before it gets too much Yoongi clearly told me today he won’t hold himself for much longer. I shouldn’t be alone with him anymore, that way he wont act out and i wont have to fail again to stop him. Clearly he knew how weak i was with him and would only make things more difficult to me.
Jin turned suddenly to me, a serious look over his features. Once the door closed beside us he looked up to my eyes, i never once saw him this serious and it was not very assuring to see him like this. I could tell he was tired, the conversation with his father took so long it must have been a hell for him.
- Jin?
- y/n… - he gave me a small smile.
All about his looks we’re telling me something was off, knowing how long it took for him to come back with an answer from his father about Yoongi and how difficult it has been ever since we stared with his treatment, this could only mean it didn’t work.
I could already feel the burning behind my eyes the more I stared at Jin as he stood in front of me, as if the entire world was coming crashing over me.
- Yoongis case…. - he began, eyes staring down at the floor - his case was passed entirely to me, I’ll be the one in charge of him from now on.
- Jin…
Just like that as my brain begins to understand his words completely, I felt like I could finally breath again.
I couldn’t believe his words, by Yoongi being passed to Jin completely he would be able to take care of him without any questions. I immediately pulled him for a hug, hearing his chuckle on my neck as he hugged me back just as tightly.
- you almost got me! - i said, pulling out to look at his face - how did you get it?
- to be honest with you, he was very reluctant at first but if it wasn’t for… - he paused, looking at both sides of the corridor before leaning closer to whisper - his new addition.
- what do you mean?
- a new snake hybrid was assigned to the clinic - he simply said, eyes shining over mine.
Another snake hybrid? I didn’t know if I should be happy for it being the reason Yoongi was released from Jin’s father or worried, he might end like Yoongi.
- what? - I asked, releasing Jin from my arms - so far it was almost impossible to get them?
Truth be told, snake hybrids were the rarest kind to be found. That was the reason Jin’s father was so set on making him mate just to continue his specie.
Jin leaned on the wall a knowing smirk on his full lips as he looked at me, putting his hands on his pockets before continuing.
- i know, but knowing dad he would do anything to get what he wants and with the positive background of Yoongis treatments done by you he managed to get the permission for it.
- what does it have to do with me? - I asked even more intrigued.
- everything about Yoongis case was reported to my father, he used that to get the female hybrid and now he got another male in case… - he paused before continuing lowly - in case Yoongi doesn’t make it.
I let his words sink in before a long sight left my lips, bitterness rising under my tongue all over again. How dare they assume he wouldn’t make it after treat him so terribly for so long just to make it seem like “he didn’t make it”.
Jin seemed to notice exactly what was running through my head as he quickly turned to me, giving me a smile.
- don’t worry y/n, that won’t happen anymore - Jin assure me, giving my should a light squeeze.
- i know… - I breathe out - I won’t let it happen.
I will do my best so Yoongi never goes through all of that pain again, I’ll continue to treat him until his fully recovered and I’ll be there for him as he mates just like any other hybrid.
He deserves everything of the best. I’ll make sure he gets the treatments he needs in order to be happy.
- is that why you were hugging before? - Jin sudden asked, making me look at him suprised.
- yeah… - I could already fell the heat rising up on my cheeks and quickly looked away from him.
I could only nod as we made our way towards the elevators, no one said anything after that and I could think was things will finally work out for us now.
Like a heavy weight was lifted from my shoulders.
[…]
After our talk me and Jin decided to rushed things a bit, since Yoongis meeting with the female hybrid was in a day. If anything went bed we still had some time to make any adjustments for him, we would be starting over with a few exams today and as the results would be ready only tomorrow Jin would be in charge of Yoongi before the mate meeting.
I couldn’t hold my excitement as we walked out of the office, it was long enough for Yoongi to finally get the rest he needed and to be treated like a patient and not a lab rat.
When’s hybrid is admitted to the clinic, we first check his vitals and take some blood samples for exams and check the levels of their hormones. As well as any symptoms of sickness he might be feeling to proceed with the medication he needs.
In his case I agreed with Jin to get him fully examined, since I didn’t know what kind of tests were done on him we would have to check everything to ensure his condition is good.
After getting the right medical devices me and Jin made our way back to Yoongis room to start his procedures.
I could do all of it alone, but lately Yoongi was making me more nervous than usual. I didn’t wanted to risk anything like before so I made sure Jin would be with me at all times, in case Yoongi might try more of his plays.
Already in front his new room i quickly inserted the code on the digital panel and the door opened, I made my way in as Jin fallowed right behind me. Even though I asked him to come for other reasons, I could tell he was excited about too.
Not many people at the clinic knew this, but Jin cared a lot for the hybrids. He was usually busy but whenever he could he would show up at the clinic and help out, just like now with Yoongi.
I couldn’t mess this up now more then ever, my feelings shouldn’t matter now. Jin is putting every effort he has into saving Yoongi, if anything happens it will only reflect badly on him.
This is a hard to carry on, I let myself fall too deep for Yoongi. But I knew that once he meets the female snake hybrid, I’ll be left out in his memory only. Hybrids crave a mate more then anything else, I was just a side effect in his life. Nothing to worry about, soon he’ll meet with the one who’s meant for him.
I should forget about this feelings now, before getting myself hurt.
- Yoongi? - I asked standing in the middle of the room as I didn’t find him anywhere there.
- where is he? - said Jin beside me
I could already begin to feel the drastic change of emotions boiling up in my chest, worrying something might have happened in the last couple hours.
But before I could even get a single word out of my mind, the snake hybrid emerged from the bathtub.
I never felt more grateful for having Jin right beside me then in that moment, as I watched Yoongi brushing his wet black hair back completely - as I notice from all his clothes on the floor - naked in that bathtub exposing his skin for all eyes to see.
I gulped down, trying my best to stay focused on the task set for myself but, oh, god, how badly I wanted to run my finger through his hair, how baldy I wanted to give in to him.
Let me bite you again.
His words were like poison in my head, completely losing myself again as his dark and glossy eyes stared right at my figure. A chill running dow my spine at the sight of him.
- Hello Yoongi - began Jin beside me and I was grateful once again - are you enjoying your new room?
- humm - he purrs, eyes still not letting go of me - now I’m.
Shit.
- that’s good to hear - Jin said - we’ll be taking a few exams right now if you could please dress yourself?
- oh, more exams - he mumbled, moving forward still in the bathtub he leaned on the edge of it before looking up at me - can you help me y/n?
- what? Oh, yes - I stumbled on my words, still not over how beautiful he looked.
My reaction seemed to amuse him as I hear his deep chuckled behind me once I quickly made my way toward the small cabinet on the right to get him a new pair of clothes and a towel, and here I though he would behave himself if we weren’t alone.
I made my way towards him to hand him the towel, feeling the heat burn my whole face once I was close enough to hand him the towel. He looked up at me for a second not moving an inch to get it, amusement clearly facing over his soft features before he took it from my hand slowly as if on purpose.
I also didn’t move an inch, not caring this time to even look away as he got up covering himself with the towel finally getting out the tub to get dressed.
Now standing in front of me he took the clothes from my hands, leaning closer to my face.
- did you think about my offer? - he whispered, dark eyes drifting down to my lips.
Offer?
Let me bite you again.
I gulped down hard. He was clearly trying to get under my skin now, something felt different about him. Ever since we got here he’s been acting different, I couldn’t wrap my finger around it but something on his voice and even his eyes were not the same.
This time I turned around not to look, making my way back to where Jin stood looking anywhere but at me and Yoongi in that moment.
- ahm… we’ll take a sample of your blood Yoongi - Jin decided to break the ice - if you don’t mind.
- is y/n the one who’ll do it? - Yoongis question brought my attention back to him, he already had dressed his bottom and turned to me and Jin while putting on his shirt.
- of course I will - I reply, Jin gave me a small smile before handing me de syringe from the small silver tray.
I notice how his eyes switched to the syringe in my hand as I approached him, looking attentively at it as I carefully lifted his arm up to take some of his blood.
This kind of procedures are needed to help detect any diseases hidden from the naked eye or any damage caused by the tests done on him over the years, since no other exams were taking to ensure of that we would have to take a new one and blood tests are more accurate in this case.
Pushing the sleeve up his arm to find his vein seeing as they weren’t blue or green but a dark gray, was something I didn’t notice before. I looked up to his eyes before continuing, he had a hard expression on his face dark eyes still focused over the syringe.
- it’s okay… - I softly mumble to him, bringing his attention back to my face - it won’t hurt, you know how is done.
- I do… it’s just… - he sighted.
- I know - I tell him, carefully running my thumb over the single gray vein on his arm - I’ll do it know.
He only nodded looking away from it. This time he moved a bit when I inserted the needle into his vein, his eyes looked at floor clouded at the motion.
Thankfully things like this didn’t took much longer and in a second I was done with it, pressing over the vein with a small cotton making sure no blood drops before sliding his sleeve back down.
- hey… - I bring his attention back to me, holding his hand softly.
He nodded slowly almost leaning towards me but I quickly took a step back, stoping him before anything happens. I gave him a small smile before turning around to give Jin the syringe and the small blood sample.
- just one more now - Jin said - should we go already?
- ah, we…
- yes, please - Yoongi interrupted before I could even ask him - the sooner we do this the sooner it ends.
- right… - Jin replied behind me already making his way toward the door.
I wait for Yoongi before making my way to Jin, taking the collar from the compartment beside the door. Yoongi is quick standing close to me lowering his head down a bit for me to close the metal collar around his neck.
Usually at time like this he would never miss the chance to stare deeply into my souls with his dark and glossy eyes but, now he looked anywhere but me. Blinking a couple of times before nervously hold into my coat, once I’m done with the collar I took his hand from my coat into my own.
He didn’t look at me but seemed to be a bit more calmer this time.
I could only wonder what might have gotten into him, Yoongi wasn’t knew to this kind of procedures so his reactions were unexpected to me.
All I could think about in that moment was make sure he was alright until we are done with the exams, I’m sure once we are alone he’ll talk to me about it.
It didn’t took much longer for us to get at the exam room, the entire way there I could notice how Yoongi only seemed to grow more anxious beside me. Unknowingly holding my hand tighter each time, if I didn’t trust myself I would’ve stop this right away. But the exam was a good thing for him, it might be very helpful in order to make the right adjustments for his health.
I didn’t minded Jin presence this time and kept myself close to Yoongi at all times, I wanted to make sure he knew I was there for him and wouldn’t let anything bad happen to him.
Once we got in the room I notice from our proximity how stiff he became at the sight of the room, stoping in front of him to change his attention from it to me.
- hey, Yoongi - letting go of his hand to hold his chin softly - I’m right here okay?
- okay…. - he murmured looking back at me.
- is alright if your nervous - I assure him.
- is everything alright? - Jin asked.
- yeah, I’ll prepare him for it you can wait in the other room - I tell him.
Jin nods giving us one last looks before leaving for the room right next to us, separated by a glass window.
I turned back to Yoongi who’s attention was back at the bed in the middle of the room, it was a scan exam done by a clinical machine above the bed.
Just like and x-ray but for your whole body.
- come with me okay? - I gently hold both his hands guiding him towards the bed.
As he sat over it i quickly undid the bottoms of his shirt to carefully place the electrodes on his chest, once I made sure his heart beat was shown on the computer beside the bed.
- alright we are almost… - I took one glance at him before everything completely changed right there.
He looked up at me almost out of breath, chest moving up and done quicker then before as a bit of sweat began to form over his forehead. He was in panic, his heart beat racing on the computer.
- Yoongi what happen? - I held his chin softly up brushing some of the sweat from his face.
- I can’t do this… - he swallowed hard - please y/n take me out of here…
He held into my coat harshly pulling me into him, tears forming under his eyes as he looked up at me.
I felt my heart breaking into a million pieces at the sight. All the abuse from Jin’s father right there in his eyes as he desperately held into me.
- I know Yoongi…. - I held his face softly between my hands - I’m right here for you okay, I’m not leaving you alone. We can do this together okay?
- y/n… - he mumbled leaning into my touch.
- I hate seeing you like this…. - I whispered - I promise this will only take one second, I’ll be right here with you please Yoongi? I have to make sure… I have to make sure they didn’t hurt you any deeper then this.
I softly traced his face with my fingers, cleaning the tears from his eyes.
He leaned towards me resting his face over my chest, hands still grabbing my coat as he brushed his hair feeling his breathing slowly began to go back to normal.
I could see Jin’s worried expression through the window on the wall, he knew better then interver in a moment like this. By now everyone knew how sensitive Yoongi could get when he is in defensive mode.
- you feel better now? - whispered to him having him slowly nod over my chest, I leaned back to see his face catching his dark glossy eyes - can we continue now?
- yes… I can do it - he murmured leaning back but still holding into me.
- I’ll be right here for you okay?
- okay.
I gave him an assured nod as he slowly began to lie down the bed, taking deep breathes as he kept his eyes on me the entire time. I held his pinky to make sure he knew I was right there for him before I tune to the glass window on the wall giving Jin a thumbs up.
Jin nodded to me and with a second the machine begging to move above Yoongi, first the light would scan the individual for then scan throughout his body.
The blue laser light of the magnetic resonance begin to scan his body from head to toe, then from down to up his head. With that the scan was done already.
Once the machine stoped Yoongi got up from the bed as quickly as possible and before I could say anything he pulled me in for a hug by the waist, chest moving up and down against mine as he breathes deep.
- see? I told you it was going to be quick - I told him, lifting my hands up to brush over his black hair.
- it’s the last time right? - he asked over my ear.
- it is Yoongi.
He sighted resting his head on my shoulder. The first step towards his new life has just started, knowing he must been through so much this kind of reaction we’re bound to occur.
But from now on Yoongi will be able to heal from all of this and I’ll be right here for him.
To be continued.
Notes: here is is finally! I hope you guys like this chapter and next update will be next week! See you guys soon! I’m sorry if it wasn’t so good the next chapters will be more interesting!! Thank you for reading my works ! 🫶🩷🩷🩷
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steddieas-shegoes · 1 year
Text
“Hey, Wayne said you refused to talk to the therapist.”
It was day 34 of visiting Eddie in the hospital, and there was finally a light at the end of the tunnel. If Eddie would talk to the therapist, he could be released into Wayne’s care.
The therapist spent two hours with him, and apparently got nothing more than some sighs and eye rolls.
“I didn’t like him.”
“Well, we can get you another one.”
“I don’t like them either.”
Steve rolled his eyes.
“You haven’t even met them yet.”
“I just know I won’t,” Eddie said as he crossed his arms, hissing when he rubbed against the bandages still covering most of his torso.
“Do you want to stay in the hospital forever?”
“No.”
“Then why can’t you just talk to the therapist? You don’t have to tell them everything, just how you’re feeling now.”
“I don’t want to.”
Steve was trying not to get frustrated. He promised Wayne he’d try to talk some sense into him patiently. It was proving to be harder than he thought it would be.
“What is it that you don’t want to tell them?”
“That maybe I did kill Chrissy! That maybe if she had just gone home or I told her no that she’d still be alive! Maybe Vecna would have gone to the next victim and I wouldn’t have to be here in pain!” Eddie was breathing heavily, his heart monitor beeping more rapidly the more he spoke.
Steve didn’t visibly react, though he wanted to. He wanted nothing more than to reach out and hold Eddie, turn back time and pretend that it was possible that Chrissy wouldn’t have died, let Eddie live his life not knowing these horrors existed.
He wanted to be able to scrub the memory of carrying Eddie’s limp and bloody body from his mind so he could go back to his regular nightmares of him dying, not the man he-
“Sorry.”
Steve’s thoughts came to an abrupt halt when Eddie spoke his apology so softly into the room. It was a direct contrast to how he’d been before, and it was startling.
A thought occurred to Steve, one he hadn’t thought of in at least two years, but felt right now.
“You know, I used to be kind of friends with Chrissy. Not close, but we talked.”
Eddie stared at him curiously, probably wondering where this could be going.
“It was funny. It didn’t happen until I wasn’t popular anymore. I guess that just shows she was a great person.”
“Yeah. She was.”
“I remember I was sitting alone eating lunch. Jason and his crew weren’t there and she walked up to me and said ‘let’s be lonely together for today.’ And I guess that was our thing, being lonely together. It sounds stupid.”
“Doesn’t sound stupid to me.”
Steve looked up and saw Eddie’s wide, wet eyes staring back at him, silently begging him to continue his story. Maybe he needed this.
“It happened a few more times and then we ended up hanging out a few times before graduation. We actually,” Steve paused and bit his lip. This would give a lot away and may end up making things worse for Eddie, but he wanted to believe it would help. “We bonded over our crush on you.”
He let it sit in the air for a moment, eyes refusing to look back up at Eddie.
Until he felt a hand on his.
“You both had a crush on me? Me?!”
“Don’t tell Robin, but she was the first person I came out to. Accidentally. And it wasn’t really coming out so much as admitting I thought you were cute.”
“You thought I was cute?!”
“Well, yeah! Always playing with your hair and doodling during class. Helping the freshman find their classes. Giving those speeches. You were brave.”
“Steve. That’s not bravery.”
“It is when everyone is willing to hurt you because of who you are.”
“I barely ever actually got beat up. Words are just words.”
“We both know that isn’t true.”
Eddie nodded, swallowed, then sighed.
“Yeah. I just didn’t want anyone to feel like me.”
“That’s why we had a crush on you!”
“Well, that’s nice that you bonded over that.”
Steve didn’t like the sudden change in his tone. Like he’d liked hearing the story, but now he realized it didn’t matter.
And maybe it didn’t.
Chrissy was still gone. Eddie still had to watch her die a terrible death.
They were both still traumatized.
But Steve still had a crush on Eddie that wouldn’t go away no matter how much he repressed it.
And maybe that part of the story was something that could change for the better.
“Robin told me I’m an idiot.”
“Yeah, she tells all of us that often.”
“But this is about something specific.”
“What is it?”
“Well, I never got over my crush on you. And instead of saying something about it, I just thought I’d forget about it eventually.”
Eddie blinked at him.
“Chrissy once dared me to ask you out. She said when you graduate, I should do it. Just take the risk.
She was pretty sure you were into both anyways.”
“She was right.”
“Yeah, she usually was,” Steve nodded. “But the problem here is you haven’t technically graduated yet.”
“No I haven’t.”
“You could, though.”
“Maybe.”
“But you have to get out of here first.”
“I see what you’re doing, Harrington.”
“What’s that?” Steve smirked and reached out to move Eddie’s hair away from his face.
“Bribing me to graduate with promises of a date.”
“Is it working?”
Eddie sighed. “Unfortunately.”
“Good. So you’ll talk to the therapist tomorrow?”
“I don’t have a choice, do I?”
“You always have a choice, I’m just hoping you choose you.” ——————————— When Eddie walked across the stage two months later to get his diploma, Steve was giving him a standing ovation.
He ignored his original plan of flipping off Principal Higgins, he didn’t want more eyes on him than he already had.
He ignored it because now he had a new plan. He was gonna walk off the stage, throw his cap in the air, and then kiss Steve Harrington.
Part 2: Prologue
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bangchansgirlsblog · 5 months
Note
another random idea.. Fem 9th member maknae reader who secretly smokes and gets caught by one of the boys who later snitches and tells chan. Reader and Chan fall out and she storms out of the dorms and ends up staying in her apartment instead to let off some steam. She realised how bad the smoking was for her health and how much it impacted her social life so she first to JYP and they send her to rehab + puts her on hiatus for two months because of rehab. Chan thinks it’s his fault for the hiatus as none of the members were told that she was going to rehab. They later find out and when Reader returns back from rehab/hiatus they all tell her how proud they are of her?
(sorry for the LONGGGG paragraph, i didn’t intend for it to be this long🧍‍♀️)
My biggest problem.
Okay maybe I got carried away a little and changed it a little but yeah forgive me 😜
Enjoy
-🩷
**
Y/n started smoking when she was 15.
She didn't know that she was eventually going to be a trainee the year after.
It was never part of her plan but when they scouted her when she was at the mall with her mum, it was a new chapter in her story and her mum begged for her to try it out. As her training days began and she tried to quit she found that she couldn’t go a day without smoking.
She was already addicted to it.
Her habit became stronger and stronger as the days got harder.
6 hours dance practice, 4 hours vocal and 2 hours media training. She found her self sneaking out for smokes during short breaks or before leaving the dorms for any type of schedule.
It sucked that she couldn't get out of it and it was affecting her.
At this point she didn’t even want to stop because if she did her body would fail.
**
1:45 pm, New York City.
"Alright people let's get started shall we?" The instructor walked onto the stage and stood at the edge waiting for everyone to get in place.
Y/n put her water bottle down and walked over to the group to get into her place so they could start practicing for the show that would happen the next day.
"Y/n and I.N I want more energy from the both of you please," Chan told the two maknae's. He was stood in the back analyzing everything to make sure it was on point.
The two nodded and stood ready to start. The sound of Charmer filled the whole stadium and their bodies started to move with the music. Their vocals being on point and their dancing being better than the last.
"What do you think?" The manager asked Chan. He was now stood down off stage looking at a different point of you. The rest of the band gasping for air.
"It was okay, I liked it but the lighting crew need to do better because I can barely see Felix in the back." He pointed and waved as he spoke. Trying to show the manager what he was imagining.
Y/n saw this as an opportunity to slip away for a bit for a short smoke break. She needed it. Her hands were shaking and her body couldn't really function due to the fuck she was going through withdrawals.
"Chan, may I use the washroom?" Her voice was timid but Chan was used to it and was able to hear her over his earpeaces.
"Yeah you can, five minutes yeah?" He replied. "Do you need one of the boys to come with you-"
"No no no it's fine," she replied fast, way to fast for Chan's liking.
"Okay," he squinted his eyes in suspicion but let it go.
She grabbed her bag and made her way through the different hallway. Making sure no one was in sight, she slipped through the backdoor to the back way alley.
It was quiet. No one was there and she was glad. She let go of the sign that lingered in her chest and pulled out the pack of cigs that laid neatly in her small pouch.
Her hands shook as she grabbed one cigarette and put it between her lips where she lit it and took a big puff.
Her body relaxed as the smoke filled her lungs. Her brain that was going hellfire was now calm and relaxed as well.
She thought she was safe when she reached for the second one. None of the boys had called her phone and it had been about 5 minutes.
"Just one more," she thought to herself.
"Y/n?" a voice called right by her ear causing her to jump and drop the pack of cigs.
"What are you doing?" She turned to look at Hyunjin who was visibly angry.
His eyebrows were furrowed and his lips were sealed tightly together.
"Hyunjin what are you doing here?" She asked as she got on her knees trying to collect the cigarettes that were now scattered all over.
"What do you mean what are you doing here? What are YOU doing here Y/n? And why are you smoking? Have you gone mad? Does Chan know about this?" He questioned standing there in shock.
"No,no Chan doesn't know about this and you're not telling him," Y/n hushed him trying to stop him from shouting and yelling.
"I think you've actually gone insane! Ofcourse I'm telling Chan,” he grabbed the cigarettes from Y/n's hand and threw them back to the ground where he stomped all over them.
"Inside. Now." He said through gritted teeth. Y/n was scared, it was visible. She grabbed her back and slowly made her way inside the venue. Her lips quivered.
"Hyunjin please don't tell Chan, please I'll do anything," she begged.
"I have to Y/n. I'm so disappointed in you. We trusted you and you do this?" His eyes couldn't meet hers. His body was tense as they walked backstage to the rooms in the back. The hallways gettin busier each second. The employees questioning why she was crying.
"Are you okay-"
"Yes she is please go along with your work," Hyunjin snapped at one of the ladies. Y/n looked up at him frightened because he was always nice to people, he never once raised his voice at an employee.
When they arrived in the room. The boys were sat on the couches or having lunch. Chan was texting on his phone when he looked up.
"Y/n? Why did you bathroom break take so long?" He laughed and looked at Hyunjin who wasn't smiling.
"I caught her smoking Chan, she reeks of cigarettes" her head fell and she looked at her new trainers that one of the companies had sent her for promotion. It looked so intriguing all of a sudden.
"You caught her what? Hyunjin your joking," Chan laughed, "please tell me your joking," he paused and looked at the serious Hyunjin.
"Tell him, tell him now." He slightly pushed her in front of him so they could be face to face.
"I-I can explain Chan,"
"No way Y/n please tell me you're joking," his voice became harsh. The boys all turned to Y/n. They were all shocked at this because she was the last person to ever do such a thing.
"What the fuck?" Changbin's voice sounded. "You've been smoking?"
"Only a little," her voice was small. Timid almost.
"Don't lie, please don't fucking lie right now Y/n." Chan says walking closer to the younger.
"Sit down, now." Leeknow says standing up and dropping his chopsticks.
"Your only 19, I get your all 'grown' BUT your still so young. You're an idol. An idol!" Chan's hand smashes against the table making her jump in her sit.
"Okay then if you think I'm an adult I should be able to smoke or drink or-"
"Are you out of your mind momo?" He snapped back at her, "Do you know what it does to you?"
"But Chan-"
"Quit Or I'll make you quit," was all Chan said before he stormed out the room leaving her with the boys who looked very disappointed.
"I get it, you don't have to look at me like I'm some monster," she wiped her tears with her sleeve to clean the tears that run down her cheeks.
"I just don't have words for you right now, your irresponsible, selfish and careless," Leeknow's words were harsh. So harsh that even Hyunjin cringed and felt bad.
"Then kick me out the band if it's such a big deal," was all she said before she got up and run out the room down the hallway past Chan who was standing by the doors while a manger tried to calm him down and out the stadium. It was cold and she had left all her stuff inside so she was forced to run down the busy streets of New York, freezing.
Chan following after her trying to figure out what was going on.
Her body was shaking from all the tears she cried.
But she continued to run.
She was able to disappear from Chan’s sight. Now Chan was really angry and worried. He'd lost his youngest in the busy streets of New York. She was new to the city and she was an idol. Anything could go wrong. Anything could go extremely wrong.
His heart was beating out of his chest. He grabbed his phone out of his picked rushing to call his manager then leeknow and the boys.
He found himself back in the changing rooms surrounded by everyone. Trying to calm him down.
"I'll go back to the hotel just in case she's back there," Felix assured Chan while he packed up his stuff.
"I'll come with you Lix," Hyunjin grabbed his bag aswell making sure to grab her stuff from the ground. He opened to make sure all her stuff was inside but the site wasn't pretty at all.
Underneath everything he saw 4 more packs of cigarettes causing him to gasp horrendously.
"What? What is it?" Bangchan's neck snapped to his direction. Hyunjin had no words so he just passed the bag to Chan who was now terrified.
"Is she addicted?" Was all he asked before handing the bag to leeknow who was curious aswell.
Chan's hands run through his hair as he was thinking of all the possible ways he could find her in the whole of New York City. He felt guilt. He felt like if he had maybe approached this in a nicer way they could have worked through it but now his anger was just blinding him.
"Okay, police were informed and we're about to go driving around to see if we can somehow spot her," their manager tells them (he was also panicking low key but he didn’t want them knowing) , "do you guys want to join?"
"I'll come with you," Leeknow says quickly.
His hands were shaking and he felt so much guilt aswell. If anything happened to Y/n it would be all his fault and he wouldn't forgive himself.
"Same Hyung," Han jumps in.
They all grabbed their bags and the three (Han, Leeknow and Chan) quickly rushed out right behind their manager.
The rest of the boys cleaned up and quickly left to go to the hotel hoping to find her there safe and sound.
It took 5 hours. 5 hours before Felix had decided to go to the cafe by the hotel to grab drinks for everyone and he had found her sat in a coffee shop, she was shivering and cold but Felix didn’t care because he was angry and Felix was never angry. Without hesitation, Felix dragged her out and back to the hotel even if she was kicking and screaming. He didn’t care. At all. He ignored her pleas and cries.
The lecture she got from Chan and all of them was hot and mean and ruthless but at the end of the day they gave her a choice to either quit or go to rehab but she chose to quit. She “promised” them.
After an hour of grilling her for answers she finally had admitted to everything that was going on and how she felt and how she was battling her own self.
Chan was beating himself up for not noticing and Leeknow was beating himself up for not being there for her.
She was so vulnerable. They all knew her secrets and her problems. She felt like a show everyone was just watching and waiting to break.
**
6:20, Japan
The first time the boys had noticed her odd behavior was starting up again, was when they had a sign meet and a concert right after. She hadn’t been able to go for a smoke in hours, her body was now trembling and she was sweating a lot. She could barely get through anything and nausea started to grow string in the pit of her stomach.
“Hey, you okay? You kinda look pale love,” Han was sat next to her getting his makeup done and so was she. He had notice she was fidgeting a lot in the chair. Her eyes were red too.
“Yeah just really tired,” she lied and gulped down thick saliva trying to get rid of the nausea but it completely failed.
“I think I’m going to be sick-“ she got up from the chair and run through the corridors to find the bathroom and once she did she through up, but it was good it was just mucus. Her head was thumping and her throat ached.
A hurried knock made her stand up and flush before she opened the door and collapsed in Han’s hands. He was worried for his younger and now he had to curry her to the rooms.
“Hey, stay with me okay? Don’t close your eyes,” he softly said while he blew air into her face to keep her cool.
When he had walked in and found leeknow sat on their changing room couch he let out a sigh of relief.
“Leeknow help me please! It’s Y/n,” he said panicked. Without hesitation leeknow stood up quickly and took her from Hans hands and put her on the couch to lay down.
Han had run down the corridor to get medics as leeknow woke her up from her faint state.
“Momo? Can you hear me? It’s leeknow,” a soft groan left her lips.
“Would you like some water?” She nodded her head and leeknow was on it. He got on one knee and started to feed her small sips of water.
“Tell me what hurts,” he softly said and played with her hair to calm her down.
“Everything,” she softly said and it aches Leeknow’s hurt.
Y/n knew the only way for her to get out of this state was to smoke but how?
“Leeknow, I- I need to use the bathroom,” she groaned and held her hand against her head.
“If you need to puke i’ll get you a bucket love,” he assured her. He didn’t want her waking and being left alone right now. He wouldn’t allow it.
“I need to pee,”
“Okay can you wait until the medics are here?” And right on cue the door opens and a frantic Han walks into the room with a few people behind him. Then Chan and Hyunjin walked in right behind.
“What happened Y/n?” Chan asked straight away and knelt beside her while he rubbed her hands.
“I don’t know Oppa, I was just not feeling the best,”
“You should have told me my love,” he softly said as he watched the medical team examine her.
“I thought it wasn’t this bad,”
“Now you see what it has done,” Hyunjin joint the conversation. “Look how tired you look, have you eaten anything all day?” He asked her.
“I had the lunch Changbin braught me,”
“So if we called Changbin right now he would agree?” Hyunjin furrowed his eyebrows and crossed his arms. Disappointed.
“No-“
“How bad is it?” Chan asked the man in uniform.
“Not bad, she’s just really dehydrated. We’ll fix an IV on her arm and she’ll be good to go, also may I speak to you outside in the corridor,” Leeknow looks at Chan worried and they exchanged the same expression before Chan head out with the guy.
“I need to pee really bad,” Y/n whines and complains.
“Okay you can go, I’ll come with you,” the lady medic says and slowly guides her to the bathroom. Y/n grabs her lighter and cig and started to smoke it. The feelings make her body slowly awaken and then gain energy. She smoked one more just incase and then washed her hands and made her way back to the last medic.
She was able to walk on her own but just to make it not look suspicious she held onto her and then finally she sat on the couch and got the iv in her arm.
Chan was back in the room and he was examining her. Trying to look for something and once it caught his eye he looked over at the rest of the boys nodding and they all just stare at eachother.
They knew. They knew she was smoking again and it hurt Chan for what was about to come was not going to be pretty.
**
10:55, south Korea
The paparazzi lights started to increase when She stood up in the podium. Her eyes were red and she had eyebags from the lack of sleep she was getting.
Her hands shook as she grabbed the microphone. The boys stood right behind her. Their head looking at the ground trying to avoid her shaking body.
"Goodmorning, my name is Y/n Y/l/n and I'm a member of strays kids. I didn't want this to happen. Trust me I didn't,"
She took a deep breath looking at the manager that were sat in the front raw. Judging her and giving her a disgusted look.
A sob Left her mouth and she put the microphone down. Trying to get herself together before she spoke again.
"To all the stays out there, I want to say I love you and I hope you guys can forgive me for this. I will be going on haitus for a while," the room is filled with gasps as the flashlights now increase even more.
"I pray that if I do come back I will be better and stronger for you guys and that I will make my group and team proud. Thank you for loving me and i hope to see you guys soon," she bowed before taking a step back and wiping her tears.
The boys all stood around her to hide her body from the camera. Han rubbing her back and whispering something in her ear.
She didn't care though, she was upset. She was so upset with herself but she still managed to blame the boys. Her reasoning? Because she felt like they were giving her up and sending her away.
**
"Alright, are you all packed?" Their manager stood outside her room.
"Yeah" she softly said rolling her bag out and handing it to the older man.
"Alright the boys are down stairs if you want to say bye, I'll be waiting in the car," he nodded and left her to close her room and head down the steps to her band mates.
They all looked upset, there was no lie there. There were all stood by the door giving her a sympathetic smile.
"I'm going to miss you," Chan steps up and pulls her into a hug. She didn't want it though. She shrugged it off and stood there looking at him with teary eyes.
"Chan please don't do this,"
"You know I want was best for you-"
"But Chan I'll change I promise just give me a chance,"
His eyes were soft and filled with tears. Guilt was eating him up. He so badly wanted not to send her away but he didn't have a choice.
"I'm sorry," the sound of a honk interrupts them and she knew it was time for her to go.
“I hate you,” she sobbed. That was the last thing she said to him and without looking back she left the dorms. Hoping that somehow she would make it out alive.
Breaking news, strays kids maknae Y/N Y/N/L and group manager in have been left in critical condition after a fatal car crash. Was it a set up?
**
I’m not doing a part two🙈
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ash5monster01 · 16 days
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Piano Man
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Chapter Two - If I Only Had the Words (to Tell You) 🎶
Pairing: Steve Harrington x FemReader
Warnings: fluff, mentions of heartbreak, abandonment issues, emotional vulnerability, heart ache, established relationship
Summary: You and Steve have been dating for nearly 6 months, all of which he’s enjoyed. Yet it has been exactly a year since Nancy told him he was bullshit. So even though he desperately wants to tell you he loves you he’s afraid you might say he’s bullshit too.
word count: 2k
One ←→ Three
Masterlist
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Fall 1985
But I only have these arms to hold you
It’s a dark Fall night. The house smelling of popcorn you had popped earlier to watch during a movie. Halloween decorations had been plastered all over Steve’s home, a home that hadn’t been decorated for any holiday in a very long time. You had changed that though, changed him. You made not only this home full, but his heart. Which is why Steve lies beside you in his bed absolutely hating himself for not being able to tell you how he feels. How much he loves you, how much you had saved him these last six months.
You had been there for it all. Cheering in the stands when he graduated, taking your lunch break to visit him everyday at Scoops Ahoy, not getting jelous of his newfound friendship with Robin, taking care of him when the monsters returned and the mall burned down, and even helping him and Robin get hired at the video store where you had worked this entire time. Everytime he thought you'd leave, somehow you were still there, and he appreciated you for every bit of it. So why the hell couldn't he say it?
He knew why. He knew because everytime he looked at the plastic Halloween decorations filling his home he was brought right back to Tina's Halloween party. Right back to that very bathroom where the only girl he ever loved looked into his eyes and told him he was bullshit. It had been a year but he still remembered how devastated he was, how his heart felt as she ripped it straight from his chest. The look in her eyes was seared into his memory, devoid of any emotion but distate blazing in them. He couldn't relive that, wouldn't relive that. Especially with you.
He may have loved Nancy but with you it was different. With you, he knew you were going to be the one. The one person handcrafted specifically for him. A soul designed to match his own in a large and lonely world. Somehow he had found you and now he wouldn't do anything to risk it, he would guarantee it. It had hurt when Nancy said she didn't love him but if you did. Well that would kill him.
"What kind of candy do the kids like?" you ask in the dark bedroom, voice overlapping that of Billy Joel's from the cassette player. You're My Home played softly throughout the room and you wished Steve knew that was how you felt about him. That until now you were pretty sure you had nowhere to belong and now you belonged to him.
"Why do you ask?” Steve hums, hands reaching to run through your hair. He lived for nights like this, where you just laid here with legs tangled together and talked about things practically meaningless.
"Well I want to make them happy, I know how much they love Halloween. Dustin hasn't shut up about it all week and I want something to cheer Mike up. I know how badly they wanted to dress up as The Goonies but with Will and El gone they can't" you tell Steve, hand lacing with his own under the covers. Steve smiles softly at you and how much you care for the very kids he had taken under his own wing.
"I don't know what kind of candy they like, I'm sure whatever is fine. As for Mike, tell him we can be Andy and Brand. Maybe I can convince Robin to be Data or something" Steve tells you, pressing a kiss to your forehead. The image of Robin in the Data costume meant for Will makes you giggle and Steve is pulling you closer, chest brushing against your own.
"You'd give up our Grease costume for that?" you ask, knowing how excited he was to be Danny Zuko and wear his leather jacket.
"Yeah but don't tell them that. They'll get big heads" Steve grumbles, practically hearing Dustin tease him about how much he loves all of them. You giggle against him and Steve warms over, feeling those very words sitting heavy on his chest. If only he had the words to tell you. He knew you were waiting, wondering why he hadn't said them. If you only had time to understand why he struggled with it so much. Everyone he ever loved left, if he said these words outloud he couldn't risk you leaving him too.
"You're the best Stevie" you tell him, leaning forward and pressing a soft kiss to his nose. Steve hums in delight, not allowing you to back away as he pulls you to his lips and kisses you quickly. He knows you love him, you only said things like that to replace those very words. If he would just say it your response would have been 'I love you Stevie'. Instead he gets broad statements that he has slowly come to despise.
"Yeah, yeah, best babysitter ever" he mumbles and you giggle because even though he pretends to hate it you know how much he loves it. How much he loves those kids. If he didn't he wouldn't spend time with them. One of those very kids was his ex girlfriend’s brother and he never let any of those things stop him. He was always there for them.
"Only the best can handle six kids at a time" you tell him and Steve searches your eyes, loving how when you look at them they’re filled with adoration instead of hate. He knows not saying anything won't change your feelings and you will carry on loving him without it. He just couldn't bring himself to say it, the urge never there even though he was practically dying inside to tell you. He wished you knew how hard it is to say.
Sometimes when he finds himself even close he feels silly. I love you seemed too simple to portray the love he had for you. It was so basic, a word your heard on the radio over and over again. Every song as simple as the last. How unoriginal were his words when the radio repeats them every single day? Even with his love for Billy Joel he figures he'll never find a song to sing you. One that perfectly depicted exactly how he felt about you. He doesn't want to sing those tired words again, words he wasted on people who never loved him back.
“You ever think about having kids?” Steve asks, leaning back into the pillow and staring at his ceiling. You admire the soft tufts of his hair on his chest, the way his bicep flexes as he reaches to tuck his hand under his head. He’s so handsome and it should scare you that your boyfriend of only six months has suddenly asked you about having kids and yet you don’t seem to mind.
“All the time” you tell him earnestly, snuggling into his side and grazing your fingers along his sternum, grinning when he shivers from your touch.
“I want to have a whole bunch, make me feel better about being an only child” Steve says, his hand pressed to your back slowly sliding up and into your hair.
“What do you mean, make you feel better?” you ask, lifting your head to glance at the boys face as he continues to be deep in thought.
“I was a lonely kid, my parents never really cared to pay any attention and without any siblings or cousins I was left to my own devices. I think it’s half the reason I was such an asshole in high school” he says, almost wincing at the thought of how many people he had treated like shit over the years just to guarantee he wouldn’t be all alone.
“You were protecting yourself” you say, understanding exactly what he means and Steve nods, eyes glancing down at your form.
“I want my kids to have built in friends and even better, present parents” he tells you and suddenly you find yourself wanting nothing more than to have kids with the boy beside you.
“You’ll be the best Dad Steve, I just know it” you tell him and there are those words again, sitting on his tongue and begging to escape but he just can’t seem to let them go. He hates himself for it, looking away before you see the regret in his eyes.
“I hope so, I just wish my Grandpa was still around to see it” he says, thinking of the only person in his life who ever really liked him for him when he was growing up. The man who had heaven sent you straight to him when he needed you the most.
“He is, don’t you worry about that Stevie” you tell him, eyes fluttering close as you listen to cassette playing in the room. The boombox clicked, indicating the start of a new song. Worse Comes to Worst slowly filling the room.
“Oh worse comes to worst. I’ll get along” you start singing the melody into the dark night air, the fall breeze fluttering in from the window and brushing against the curtains.
“I don’t know how, but sometimes - I can be strong” Steve starts singing along with you and suddenly your both giggling into the night, sharing a love for one another and a love for Billy Joel. The very man that had brought you two together.
“Do you ever get sick of listening to him?” Steve asks and you know he’s asking you about Billy Joel. You shake your head softly against his chest, gazing into those hazel eyes.
“No, he reminds me of you. Makes me feel close to you no matter where I am. Yet I suppose that’s exactly how he makes you feel about your Grandpa” you say, voice humming along the boys ribs.
“Yeah but now he reminds me of you too” Steve admits and you smile before leaning up and capturing his lips in your own. When you had approached the sad boy in the record store you never would have imagined it would bring you here.
"I'm gonna try and sleep" you tell the boy, snuggling closer and allowing your heavy eyelids to close. Steve smiles softly and presses another kiss to your forehead. He knows life goes on and tonight will soon be gone. Another missed opportunity to tell you exactly how he feels. His wished he had the words to tell you but instead he only has his arms to hold you, pulling you closer into him. It's really all you can ask of any man, to be held with such love even if he won't say it.
"Goodnight Rosy" he mutters, 'I love you' he says in his head. He knows disappointment swells in your chest, having been by his side for six months and waiting to know exactly how he felt about you. The only noise in the dark room now is the voice of Billy Joel and your soft breathing. He pulls you close, relishing in the feeling of having you in his arms. When he’s sure you’re asleep he tells you.
"I love you Rosy, I really do. Just please don't give up on me, I promise I want to say it. You deserve to know just how much I adore you but every person I've ever loved has left me. I know you won't but I need time for my head to catch up with my heart. Until then, if I only had the words to tell you..."
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