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saltburnedme · 5 months

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Catch Me If You Can

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Paring: Oliver Quick x Fem!Reader

Word count: 3533

Summary: Living at Saltburn you’d had repeated nightmares about getting lost in the labyrinth. What happens when your nightmare becomes true?

Warnings: SMUT (ONLY READ IF YOU ARE 18+) unprotected sex, choking, stalking? Kind of?, being drunk/drugged, being chased/threatened with a weapon, dub con, generally fucked up smut overall, lots of mentions of blood, pray/predator vibes

You stumbled through the darkness down each twist and turn of the labyrinth, the blood rushing through your veins, that’s when you hear it. The crunch of gravel under a foot that wasn’t your own and in that moment, you knew you weren’t alone.

That’s how the nightmare always starts. You’d gotten lost in the labyrinth at Saltburn enough throughout your childhood to know never to go in there without telling someone where you were. You’d had the same repetitive nightmare for years; you’d go in and never come out. You didn’t know why this stuck with you as much as it did, but it did, nevertheless. Because of this you made it your mission to memorise every step, you knew exactly which way led to the middle, exit and every dead end, you’d walk the maze every day just to make sure that you’d never be caught out.

You’d walked it alone for years, that was until this summer. Felix had brought a friend back; you hadn’t thought much of him until he asked to walk the maze with you. It had taken a few adventures to warm up to him as he wasn’t exactly the most outgoing of men you’d ever experienced in your life, but he seemed well meaning and it was a nice change from constantly walking alone. You weren’t sure why, but for some reason he wanted to learn the labyrinth as much as you did.

You’d never accuse him of it, but it sometimes felt as if he was planning for something more. You had watched his confidence change over time as you spent your afternoons wandering with him. You told him about your nightmare in detail, he was kind and understanding, trying to reassure you that nothing like that could ever happen. Over the time in your presence, he’d gone from a quiet boy to a confident man, almost domineering you when alone but reverting into his old self as soon as you were around others. You had so many questions, you thought that he’d been holding back, and you wanted to see just how far he’d go if he really had you alone although you were certain you’d never say it or so you thought.

The summer sun beat down on the garden and the whole family had been drinking heavily consistently since noon. You’d been in and out of the lake all day, swimming for a while and then lying on the grass soaking up the sun. Members of the party came and went as they pleased until before you knew it, day turned to night. Throwing on a long white sun dress, you lay there until you were the last one left on the grass taking in the stars as you lay there giggling to yourself through a drunken haze. You’d been so taken by the events of the day that you hadn’t even realised until now that you’d missed your daily trip around the labyrinth. You knew it wasn’t a good idea, you hadn’t told anyone where you were going and although you weren’t the drunkest, you’d ever been in your life you certainly weren’t sober. This wasn’t enough to deter you though, you were determined.

Standing on shaky legs you made your way to the labyrinth with a little skip, although your nightmare was always at the forefront of your mind on any trip there right now you felt invincible. Your tipsy mind pushed any sense of danger to the background, right now all you felt was a fuzzy tingling throughout your body and an excitement for a late-night adventure. You made it to the entrance of the maze before you knew it, staring down the first path as you contemplated whether or not this was something you really should be doing. Within a split second you had decided, you were going in. You were certain, this was until something out of the corner of your vision caught your eye.

‘I wouldn’t go in there if I were you’ he says, leaning against the entrance of the maze. ‘Anything could happen in the dark’ he continues, his face lit only by the cigarette he had pressed to his lips, a wine bottle in his other hand.

‘Fuck, Oliver. What are you doing out here? I thought everyone had gone to bed?’ You asked, your heart racing in your chest. It was just Oliver; you knew you were safe with him you thought to yourself.

‘Couldn’t sleep, not knowing you were out here alone’ he says continuously smoking and seeming to be avoiding eye contact with you, staring at the ground in front of him. Something was different, you knew he was at least a little drunk too so maybe that was it, but something felt off.

‘So, you came looking for me?.. in the dark’ you reply, waiting for any kind of response but receiving none. You could feel the alcohol running through your veins, you knew that if you were sober this would have been enough to scare you and although you’d never admit it you were terrified and you thought you might even like it. ‘Well, if you don’t think I should go in there alone you could always come with me?’ You proposition, growing more giggly twirling your hair around your fingers. That drew his attention, still no eye contact but you could feel him watching you, watching the way your fingers moved together and how your dress fell against your curves as you shifted unable to stand still.

‘I don’t think that’s a good idea sweetheart’ he says, taking the last few drags on his cigarette, flicking the butt off into the nearby grass. You feel a surge of confidence as you move closer to him, your body almost touching his as you lean in almost speaking in a whisper. Taking the bottle from his hand you take a large gulp, the red wine trickling down your chin staining the fabric of your white dress appearing almost like blood.

‘I think it’s a great idea’ you start, your face so close to his now that your eyelashes almost graze his cheek, pushing the bottle into his chest in a drunken attempt to give it back. You’d found him attractive for a while, he’d grown on you over the last few weeks, and you finally felt like it was happening, this was your chance. ‘I think you should come into the maze with me’ you giggle. ‘And who knows, maybe if you find me you can fuck me’ you say, that caught his attention. His blue eyes reflecting in the moonlight as his gaze meets yours, he almost looked angry.

This is not what he wanted, Oliver thought to himself, he didn’t want you, not like this anyway. He knew it was sick to think it, but he didn’t want you to give yourself to him, he wanted to take you for himself. As you flirted and giggled, he felt the heat rise in his chest, his heartbeat against his rib cage as his aggression soared. He thought of you as a pure little thing, he would have even said untouched if he hadn’t have heard stories from the others, but you seemed pure to him, nevertheless. He loved the thought of you helpless underneath him, for him to be both the villain and the saviour in your eyes. But hearing you speak like this ruined everything, you’d never spoken to him like this before, he didn’t want to hear you beg him to fuck you, he wanted you to beg him to stop. He’d come out here with a plan, he wanted to take you into the maze and rob you of any shred of virginity that you had left, but now with the way you were talking you were just a whore in his eyes. A slut that was unworthy of him. So, he stood there before you wordless, gazing down upon you in anger as his ocean blue eyes turned black, you stood looking up towards him as much as you could in your drunken state. You thought he seemed angry, but you were so drunk at this point that you wouldn’t have been able to tell either way, the alcohol from Oliver’s wine bottle hitting you way harder than you anticipated.

‘Maybe I can fuck you?’ He finally repeats back to you. ‘Maybe you’ll let me fuck you?’ He sneers as he stands straight, almost pushing you over as he moves closer, his chest pressed to yours. ‘Because that’s such a prize’ he continues, practically laughing in your face, if you thought he was flirting before you could now see, even as drunk as you were, that he was very much not happy. ‘Well then pretty thing, I think you should start running. Can’t catch you if you aren’t running now, can I?’ He says, so he does want you? You question to yourself. One moment he’s almost refusing you and the next he wants you? At this point you felt almost as much confusion as you felt fear. That was until he does it, he pushes you into the labyrinth making you stumble as he does, losing your balance ending up lying face down in the gravel as you turn back from your position on the floor to see him. With the moonlight shining from behind him he looked much taller and more menacing, the kind boy you knew was gone, replaced by only the silhouette of the body he once inhabited.

‘Go on then, run’ he almost growls out as your heart rate increases, you want to let out a scream, but nothing comes. Stumbling to your feet you immediately start running. Turning around to try and see if you could outrun him, you see him still standing at the entrance, then you hear it, the familiar sound of smashing glass. He’d broken the bottle against the statue that’s placed at each entrance of the maze, now only holding the broken neck of the bottle as he begins his pursuit towards you.

You run as fast as you can, rounding the corners of the maze in record speed. You knew the labyrinth well enough that you were certain you could get out before him, this is exactly why you’d been waking it all this time anyway. This was almost exactly like your nightmare you thought to yourself. When you first propositioned Oliver, this was not exactly what you’d imagined. You had pictured this going much differently, you’d giggle and run at an almost walking pace so not to make it too difficult to catch you. But this was wrong, he was wrong.

You didn’t know what exactly had changed within Oliver, but something was drastically off. The Oliver you knew would never have looked at you the way he did or spoken to you as he did. You were absolutely certain that your sweet predictable Oliver wouldn’t have smashed a bottle into a weapon and literally chased you down with it. While you may have practiced your escape from the maze many times, you now realise that you’d never practiced running it as you gasp for breath between each step of your quick moving feet.

Checking behind you Oliver is nowhere to be seen, your pace slowing as you think you may have lost him giving you some time to catch your breath. You stumble your way through the maze, you were sure you were about to get to the middle and make your way out but instead where the exit should be, a dead end. You were sure this couldn’t be right you weren’t lost, surely you couldn’t be. You begin to trace your steps back, finding the topiary equivalent of a crossroads. You see him but you're not sure he’s seen you, crossing in a slightly different direction heading towards the opposite side of the maze. Yet when you look another way, he appears to be walking towards you, and in another direction away from you. You swear you can almost feel him graze your shoulder as he passes you, his shoulder brushing past yours in different directions over and over again as you fall to the floor, crawling on your hands and knees as the hard gravel punctures the skin on your knees leaving behind a small trail of blood.

You knew there couldn’t be that many of him, tears streaming down your cheeks as you rub your eyes. Finally, re opening them you find yourself alone, was any of that real? Was he even in the maze at all? You question yourself, your sanity in its entirety. You can still taste the red wine on your lips, you thought it tasted off at the time but now you were sure, you were drugged or at the very least incredibly drunk.

Stumbling to your feet you use the hedge to the side of you to re gain your balance. Just like in your nightmare you hear the sound of gravel crunch behind you, turning your head you catch the glimmer of light reflecting from the broken wine bottle just as he swings for your neck, screaming and running immediately as you hear his pace quicken behind you. You’d completely lost the grip on where you were in the maze, you could be at the exit for all you knew, but in this moment you just ran straight. The hedges seemed to lengthen as you ran, this singular corridor appearing never ending as you sprint. Almost as if you were in a dream you seemed to run on one spot like you were practically on a treadmill, going nowhere fast. You could hear him behind you, you were sure of it, you tried to look but the tears falling from your eyes blurred your vision too much. Continuing to run forwards you feel as if you can see the light at the end of the metaphorical tunnel, you can see the statue in the centre of the labyrinth dead ahead of you, a feeling of relief flooding your senses as you head straight.

You’ve made it, you’re almost out you think to yourself. Just as you meet the edge of the hedge facing the centre he steps out, your form slamming into his unmoving body forcing you to stop running.

‘Found you’ he says with a smirk, smiling down menacingly at you as his tongue swipes over his bottom lip. You knew you were facing the statue but as he begins to back you into a corner you feel yourself walk backwards into something hard, your body slamming into solid stone. Pressed against the statue at the centre of the maze you look around confused. Where were you? Had you been in the middle this whole time? You were certain you were facing towards it but now the statue was pressed behind you. Regardless it was of little consequence, he had found you.

‘Do I get my prize now little dove?’ He asks you without really asking, not waiting for a reply he wraps his hand around your throat, the other hand still wrapped around the broken neck of the bottle as he uses it to slice the fabric straps of your dress free from your shoulders, your dress falling to the ground. His hand tightening on your throat he leans in to kiss you as you resist, biting him in response feeling blood trickle down both of your lips, the metallic taste swirling around your mouth.

‘You think fighting back will stop me?’ He questions, your resistance only seeming to fuel his desire for you as he grinds his length into your thigh. ‘You thought wrong, dove’ he continues.

Throwing the bottle neck to the floor you hear it smash against the gravel in the distance, that’s one obstacle out of the way you think as he spins you around, pressing your chest into the statue that now stood in front of you. With one hand still around your throat you hear the jingle of his belt unclasping. The swimwear you were wearing from earlier in the day still firmly held against your body for only a few more moments as you feel his strong hands rip the fabric in two, throwing it to the side as you feel his fingers glide through your folds.

‘Fuck little dove’ You were almost embarrassingly wet, you hadn’t realised it until now due to the fear, but maybe that’s exactly why you were as you were. His words coming out as almost a whisper only meant to be heard by himself. To Oliver it’s almost as if you weren’t real, your skin was so soft, your entrance was so wet and warm that he could have been convinced that this was another dream of his and he’d wake up with his hand fisting his cock for relief. But this was real, he could hear your breathing below him quicken as he pushes his fingers into you, curling them as your hands tighten on the marble in front of you.

You moan as he lets out obscenities behind you, sliding more fingers inside of your tight hole, his eyes transfixed on the way his digits glide in and out of you so easily. Eventually removing his fingers from you, his grip around your neck tightens as he pulls your back to become flush with his chest, his free hand coming to cup just below your chin.

‘Spit’ he demands, grabbing your face slightly as he waits for you to drool into his hand. You look towards his hand as you spit into his open palm, a mixture of clear liquid and blood coming out of your mouth as he quickly covers his length in it, coating himself and you in the mixture as he thrusts up into you without warning.

Although you were outside, the slapping, squelching sounds seem to echo off of the walls of the labyrinth. You can hear him groan in pleasure behind you, enjoying the feeling of choking you as he gazes down at the view of himself sinking into you over and over again. He loved seeing you like this, his hand around your throat and your pussy covered in a mixture of blood, cum and spit as he pulled you back once again. His mouth meeting yours in a hurried kiss, his tongue sliding into your mouth. Both of your breaths quickened you taste his blood from his split lip once more. As soon as the taste hits your tongue you feel yourself tighten around him, his free hand coming down to rub circles into your clit.

‘Cum for me little dove’ He demands as you moan, your head dropped back onto his shoulder. ‘Show me what a good girl you are’ He prompts as his fingers press harder into you, desperate to draw out your orgasm. ‘Fuck, that’s it sweet girl’ groaning into your ear as you ride out your climax around his cock, tightening on him as his pace picks up.

His movements becoming more erratic as he works towards his own peak, your body limp in his grip as he fucks you, exhausted from your own climax and over stimulated as he thrusts into you. Your moans must have been loud enough to be heard outside of the labyrinth you were sure, and now as you feel him throb inside of you, you were certain people must have heard him too. Without warning he spills inside of you, his cum painting your walls white as he bites down on your shoulder hard enough to draw blood as he climaxes.

Both breathing heavily he pulls your head back by your hair for one last lust filled kiss. His touch almost tender as he removes himself from you. You hear him fastening his belt as you hold onto the statue in front of you for balance, all of your clothing ripped and discarded on the floor you feel him place his jacket onto your shoulders.

‘You scared me’ you say with a slightly fearful smile, the evidence of your enjoyment in your voice as you speak out for the first time since entering the maze, your tone coming out rasp. ‘Maybe we should do it again some time’ you giggle as you move your ass back against him, eliciting no response other than the sound of his continued breathing. ‘Don’t you think so Oliver?’ You ask, hoping with all of your heart that finally after all of this your soft kind man would return to you but receiving no reply.

‘Oliver?’ You question into the darkness as you turn, your eyes searching for him despite having felt his touch on you only moments ago. But he was nowhere to be seen, the only trace of him being his jacket on your shoulders, his blood on your lips and the trickle of his cum now working its way down your thigh. ‘Oliver?’ You speak out quieter. He was gone and you knew it. Gathering your things you made your way back towards the house, was any of it real?

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undiscovered-horizon · 1 year

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"Apple tree" - Kaz Brekker x Reader

[nudity]

SUMMARY: No one recognizes the melody Kaz sometimes hums to himself while lost in thought. Neither does anyone know where he disappears for entire nights or why he seems happier when he returns.

WORDCOUNT: ~ 1.5k

>>Grishaverse-inspired playlist<<

In those rare moments when Kaz is too focused on something to pay attention to the material world, a soft hum would escape his lips as though the tune could finally wriggle out of his cluttered mind and dance along the cold winds of Ketterdam. Set free, at last!

Jesper once asked him about the melody but Kaz only gave him a puzzled look as though he wasn’t aware of his own habit. Knowing that they can’t possibly force anything from their hard-headed boss, the Crows began making bets among themselves:

‘Probably just a barkeep’s song he can’t get out of his head.’

‘Some kind of a meditation technique.’

‘Maybe it’s a song from his neighbourhood?’

‘Lullaby his mother sang to him!’

But all of their guesses were equally good. Although, a more accurate expression would be ‘equally incorrect’. As months turned into years, the mystery remained, while the nosy rogues still aren’t any closer to solving it. What’s worse, they are beginning to run out of ideas.

Arguing about the melody in hushed voices, they never see him leave - only notice his sudden absence. This part of the enigma, however, is well-known to them: Kaz will reappear in the late morning the next day, a lot more patient and relaxed than he was the night before. Where could he possibly vanish to, they wondered.

Kaz hears himself quietly sigh in relief when your quiet voice reaches his ears. The longed-for sound comes from the hall, growing louder as you walk into your bedroom. Sitting on your bed with his back against the wall, he has a perfect view of your silhouette rounding the corner and entering the room. An uncomfortable tightness presses down on Kaz’s chest, the very same sensation he felt that fateful day when your eyes met. Despite all this time, he hasn’t yet gotten used to the sight: you emerge from the hall as though you were just breathed into life, with the softness of something oblivious to the terror of the surrounding world. He likes that thought, no matter how naive it is - that he can both have you all to himself and protect you from what he is.

“Near my garden bloomed an apple tree,” you sing to yourself. “Bloomed in white, it had red apples.”

There’s something in your voice that he can’t quite put a finger on - a sense of longing, melancholy, as though the song becomes a coded message when it brushes past your lips; like there’s a heartache you haven’t yet shared with him. He sometimes wonders how many tears you’ve cried when he wasn’t looking but the thought makes him too angry to entertain it for more than a handful of seconds.

The lack of attention you give Kaz is quite deceptive. You’re standing right in the middle of the room, undressing a little too temptingly for it to be an accident. There’s no shame or shyness left in you - after all, he’s seen all of it before, many times. His eyes burn your skin in the same way a ray of sunshine feels against cold cheeks in the middle of winter. You bask in it, the desire that still burns after all those years, even if he doesn’t quite realize it.

“Who will pick them for me when my Johnny is cross?”

A horse’s neighing diverts Kaz’s attention from you to the cracked-open window. It’s like a robbery - the smallest gap can be an entrance. Or an exit, for that matter. Although your voice is hushed, audible only to him and yourself, Kaz begins to feel envious at the notion that the night breeze could possibly carry this sweet tune to undeserving ears. Perhaps it is childish of him to think that he could have exclusive ownership of you and this little song, to finally have something he can call his own.

“He’s angry but I don’t know why. Used to visit me but I don’t know why.”

His gaze returns to you, watching closely as you sit at the vanity. The oil lamp beside you lights up only half of your face, making you appear somewhat elusive, a bird of paradise that shall escape the moment you loosen your grip around its wings. You’re taking off your jewelery, putting it away to assorted boxes with utmost attention and care. Kaz can relate to this, in a way - years ago, when your romance was only buds about to bloom, he warned you that you should find another man, someone who can give you the lavish lifestyle you deserve and intimacy you certainly want. But you were more than unwilling to listen and that was, perhaps, your last mistake as the moment you gave yourself to him, Kaz was going to fight tooth and nail to keep the status quo. He is a crow, after all - a greedy collector of treasures.

“He visited me all spring, asking mother when I would grow.”

For the first time this evening, your gaze deliberately meets his. You’re still sitting at the vanity, sideways to Kaz, and you have to look over your shoulder to see his face. In that moment, there is something so divine about you, he begins to doubt his senses. His mind relates to various frescos and paintings of the Saints he has seen. Those same pieces of exquisite artistry bring thousands of people to their knees, bowing in front of faces as gentle as yours. Their hearts suddenly rejoicing in the presence of merciful, watchful eyes that only know love and care. No Saint has ever watched over him, so perhaps it is only natural that he should start praying to you. Epiphany, after all, is not an artifact of pews, old pages and litanies - it is the moment you see yourself through the eyes of your lover, only to realize that not an ounce of your soul could ever be unlovable.

That look in your eyes - he both hates it and yearns for it. It’s like you’re staring at something worth admiring. Kaz always thinks he sees there a note of mercy; a look of compassion and understanding given to a wounded animal that tries to remain threatening. Maybe you have fallen into a trap he didn’t even know he had set.

A few minutes pass by when you and Kaz simply watch each other. The silence is filled with nothing and everything at once - unspoken promises, words of poetry and grandeur that would only attract malice if said in Ketterdam.

“Something’s on your mind,” he breaks the comfortable quietness.

“You should get some rest, love.”

Kaz has a burning suspicion that you know very well what you’re doing to him with your small, albeit still groundbreaking, confessions of adoration. The closer he grew to you, to more of those affirmations he began to notice. Mostly, they aren’t straightforward but like snowdrops in February, they are apparent to those looking for them and by the Saints, does Kaz Brekker look for the confirmation of your love, never quite satiated. In words of care, ‘go to sleep’ or ‘eat something’, he’s learned to find intimacy beyond spoken language.

“I didn’t come here for rest,” Kaz informs. No one in their right mind would choose sleep over the presence of something too divine to be considered only human.

A wide smile creeps onto your face. How is he supposed to remain ‘the Bastard’ when you’re looking at him like that?

“Then what for?” you coax.

He cocks his head, staring at you with a glint of mischief in his eyes. “Perhaps I just enjoy the view.”

“Oh my, did you just give me a compliment?” Jokingly, you put a hand on your chest. A giggle escapes your lips.

“Would that be so awful?”

You stand up from the vanity, making your way towards him. His watchful gaze never leaves you, painting Kaz something of a predator - waiting for the perfect opportunity to pounce. Climbing into your bed, you lay beside him.

“So awful I’d stay up all night thinking about it,” you say in a hushed tone.

Ever since he’s gotten comfortable with that, the motion of laying his head against your chest feels so natural to Kaz that he can hardly believe he has lived most of his life without doing so. Your muffled heartbeat rings in his ears and he unknowingly takes a deep, slow breath - you’re right here with him. Most importantly, you’re okay and that’s enough for him to put his thoughts at rest. Your hand brushes through his hair. To Kaz, intimacy feels perfectly strange.

In a voice barely louder than the calm rhythm of your heart, you finish the song that has bewitched Kaz about as much as you have:

“He visited me all summer and I kissed him for that. He visited me all autumn and I put apples in his pockets.”

When his consciousness dances along the line of sleep and wake, he feels your warm lips softly kissing his forehead. Maybe he has been wrong all along and it was you who had trapped him. Not that he has any desire to break free, of course.

#kaz brekker fanfiction #kaz brekker #kaz brekker fanfic #kaz brekker imagine #kaz brekker x reader #six of crows fanfic #six of crows x reader #six of crows imagine #six of crows fanfiction #six of crows #shadow and bone fanfic #shadow and bone imagine #shadow and bone #shadow and bone x reader #shadow and bone fanfiction #kaz brekker x you #six of crows x you #shadow and bone x you #Spotify

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bunji-enthusiast · 4 months

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Hello, I hope that my message reaches you, in general, here it is. Platonic Catnap x fem!reader, she is Catnap's caretaker, she makes sure that Catnap is healthy and exhausted, reader works with him at night, due to the fact that the reader has insomnia, she can not sleep for a very long time (by the way, because of this, she was chosen as Catnap's caretaker), so she can keep up with Catnap, but she can sometimes pass out, which is why you can't wake her up for a long time, and she sleeps in ridiculous positions, which caused a lot of awkward and embarrassing situations, it’s funny that the only thing that can wake her up is some kind of quiet sound. Now about the reader herself, she is calm but sarcastic, and a big workaholic, she is a very responsible person, and someone who never misses work, unlike other caretaker's smiling critter's, she is antisocial and rarely seen, reader can only be seen at work, or around Catnap, or both, so Catnap and reader always avoids the event together until Dogday and his caretaker find them, reader is mostly alone and she is only friends with Catnap, Dogday, and his caretaker, although reader does not show verbal affection, but her actions show how very cares a lot about Catnap, they are the type of friends who just sit for hours together and are silent, doing nothing, but they feel comfortable about it, reader sometimes falls asleep next to Catnap, because of the feeling of trust, and security, well, and also because she likes the smell of lavender, and it calms her and puts her to sleep. Everything was going well until the reader realized ... that the toys were alive, she initially thought it was some kind of advanced technology, animatronics, but when she saw one of the toys eating or bleeding ... she began to suspect something, and becomes more suspicious, the management/superiors noticed this, and decided (fortunately) to simply fire her, forbidding her from approaching Poppy Playtime, because of this she lost contact with Catnap, except for the caretaker of Dogday, after that ... Catnap decides to arrange an hour of joy, because the only thing that kept him from this was the reader, but since she is no longer there ... there is no point in delaying this moment any longer

Thanks in advance for writing

Stranger To Home

Note || ya’ll have IDEAS, I’m jealous. Anyway hope this was okay :>

WC || 1,718

Sleep wasn’t a gift made for you, you never had truly earned it. Many of your co-workers would call you a night owl, but you simply had lost all motive behind those intentions to actually care for their words. Or anyone else’s in particular, you just wanted to work your shift, get the job done and clock out. Though, in retrospect with your tendencies to stay up so late, even shifting into any other time of the day – it is befitting to be labeled an insomniac. Which had you guessing as to why that was your superior’s decision to assign you to CatNap, to be his official caretaker.

You groan, for once in a while you have truly broken your stoic facade. Your hand wanders over to the broom, ready to clean up the mess advertised to you.“If Jessie was smarter than this, then she really–” An unnatural sound had struck you from your focus, you turn to see CatNap laying on the floor, legs folding and head tucked just like a true cat would be in. You could never get over how wide of a gaping mouth that he wears.

“So silent.” You whisper, rolling your eyes as you go back to focus on cleaning up the mess in front of you.

You wished you were more prepared to be faced with the grievances of his appearance nevertheless, but he was simply an animatronic, nothing you couldn’t handle. They just wanted you to take care of him, make sure all was working correctly and right. Couldn’t help the fact that he too was an insomniac just like you. The superiors certainly had an eye for pairing people and things together, but you weren’t sure how well you get along with CatNap.

Strangely enough nonetheless, CatNap seemed to be so lifelike for being a giant animatronic. Nothing to mull over anyhow, you just wanted to get your job done.

His presence was a comforting one though, you could multitask and get jobs done quicker that way. You never really hung around in one place for long, neither had he, only in the case of actually being seen sleeping on-top of one another – like a cuddle pile. Like many of the smiling critters, he had an assigned smell, something natural that they would emit.

You really liked the lavender, however you would never admit that to anyone but just you and him. It was comforting, which had helped you to sleep most of the time. Help anyone be unlucky to cross paths with you when you didn’t get your much needed sleep. Your emotions were much more terse and more so colder when you haven't slept properly.

You continue mopping the mess in front of you, sweeping it into the bucket and letting it dry after a few uses. “CatNap, get yourself up. Need to move to the next location.” He rumbled and purred, shaking himself off as he sat up, hind legs folding into a straight stance. You almost forgot how large CatNap and the rest of the smiling critters were.

Speaking of which, you had needed to check in on with DogDay’s caretaker. You didn’t want the sunny dog’s caretaker to be lagging behind in their duties, no doubt with the children however. Something to worry about when you are finished with this anyhow, you need to maintain your work ethic. Which seemed to be ridiculous in hindsight, but you were being paid, and the colorful themes and the children in Playcare placated your being for a moment's time of peace.

You walked and walked, weaving effortlessly as you have before so many times. You recall your superiors, saying that you had a better planning of one’s time to get your own work done. Which in turn had raised your paycheck, surprisingly that had happened for once in your life. Your efforts being recognised and being paid like you were supposed to be.

“I’m gonna assume you're crawling on the side wall,” You sigh, holding the mop firmly in hand as you walk along the hallway. Posters and plenty of colorful lines decorated the walkway, “CatNap try not to hurt yourself, we don’t need a repeat.” You raise your brow, tone steadied to be a monotone one. A loud rumble was emitted in response, your once lifted head had dropped back to level with satisfaction.

He isn’t much of a talker, You thought to yourself, steps echoing throughout. Yet the only thing buzzing in your mind was your thoughts. Not like DogDay anyway, did they design him to be cordially mute or something?

Your hand turned the knob, and you had opened the door to be met with pedestrians, and the usual guests. Many of which–rarely–are looking to adopt the children from the orphanage, children get lucky to have good parents. Or otherwise, people who just parent poorly. You sympathize with the poor souls. One case had steadily reminded you of these circumstances, nothing of adoption, just something similar.

Nothing to mull about, just continue working. Company policy is company policy, it simply isn’t your place to intervene at any rate.

Your plait legs had easily worked through the crowds of people, nobody had bothered to pay attention to you as it was common to see people at work. You were without any grief fortunately as you didn’t like to be bothered by people, it was unnecessary and crude ‘less they truly had reason to take up your time.

A hand tapped your exposed legs, of course, you were wearing white jean shorts (nothing obstructing, or cause of dress code). You turn around and sigh, ready to be fined for your defiance of your dressing. To your shock, it was just a child. One of them from the orphanage you assume.

She shifted on the balls of her bare feet, dirtied by the floors of the hallway. Indecent adults, you’d have to come back to this area later.

“Um..” Her small voice came out, laced with nervousness and worry. “I think someone got hurt.” You raise a brow, bending down to be eye level with the child. You ease yourself to appear calm and less temperamental, you didn’t want to give her a freight. Slowly you spoke, “Who got hurt?”

You nod your head, almost as if you were titling your head in a questioning manner. “Can you tell me dear?” She shook with a nervousness that had taken you by surprise, you took her by the waist and hoisted her up to your level. The small girl clutched onto your chest as she steadied herself to speak again, “Ah.. it was the unicorn lady.” You feigned a look of exasperation, holding her close to reassure her.

“I’m sure Craftycorn is just fine,” You knit the lapels of her outfit into a tight twirl. Suddenly you had received an idea, “Hey, I’ll go check on her. That okay?” She nods, you set her back down. The young girl had waddled away to where she had come from, she was certainly instinctive no doubt. Making all the way here like that, simply would violate health codes.

You look back up at the shadowed ceiling, noting how the hallway was mostly desolate of guests. “Go on ahead, gotta check.” You jab a thumb in the general direction, referring to the silent and giant cat. You assume he had taken into precaution what you were indicating and had obeyed your command. This was gonna be a hassle, but you had to take caution of the well-being of the other smiling critters should the original caretaker of that smiling critter be out for the day (or moment for that matter). You weren’t close to Craftycorn’s caretaker, but it was unfortunately on your end you were far more work-oriented. This job has kept you afloat.

Getting there wasn’t much trouble, it seemed there were already other more qualified workers to attend to Craftycorn. Yet something about her seemed amiss, it startled you even once you had gotten a closer look. You didn’t want to believe it to be true, why was she bleeding?

Animatronics shouldn’t be able to bleed.

Why is she bleeding?

The girl was right.

Oh no.

The toys are alive, CatNap was real, DogDay was real. Everything that DogDay’s caretaker had told you was nothing but the absolute truth, you should’ve realized it before. Playtime Co. Factory was nothing what it seemed, what the hell were you getting yourself into?

You couldn’t just come to this realization and walk away pretending you knew nothing about it, this was startling. All those children that had been whisked away before – you thought they were adopted, no, they were experimented on.

With a heavy breath, you turned and walked away. You didn’t want to stay there any longer then you had to, you didn’t want to know this. Why were they doing this? so cruel to the children and adults alike. You had thought better of Elliot Ludwig, now whatever image you had of the founder was erased.

Soon enough, you were back at your work station with CatNap at rest. You mulled about what to do; telling wasn’t an option, trying to shut it down neither.

You turned on your swivel chair, directing your line of sight right at CatNap who had no care for your eyes laying to rest upon his body. ‘Did it happen to you too?’ You remember a child from before, you only saw him before. Very briefly from amongst the distance as you weren’t a caretaker of any of the children. Would explain Ms. Harper, she was quite different, you remember she was interviewed by the superiors. Never in your life had you been so stricken by thoughts, troubling sure, but it was disastrous enough as is.

What is Poppy Playtime?

Your superiors had taken notice of you uncovering more and more of Poppy Playtime’s secrets, it would be unconventional that they may be leaked to the public. So they had fired you, it was in opportune fortune that CatNap had liked you so much. A perfect friend, a perfect caretaker.

Much to the disdain of CatNap is when you have been fired, removed.

He had no reason to hold back on it any more, deciding to finally request to initiate the Hour Of Joy.

#poppy playtime #poppy playtime x reader #poppy playtime chapter 3 #x reader #catnap poppy playtime #catnap #dogday poppy playtime #poppy playtime dogday

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permanentswaps · 22 days

Text

Walk on the Wild Side Pt. 2

Read Pt. 1 here.

Kris’s POV

Fuck, like I'm ever gonna give that twink his body back, I chuckled to myself. He sends me messages every day – sometimes he’s begging to swap back, sometimes he’s begging for me to fuck his ass. It's cute, but like I said, I don't do charity cases.

And why would I ever want to go back to that body when my business has increased tenfold in this one? Yeah, getting mentally domed by a skinny guy in his early twenties is definitely a turn-on for some guys. But getting mentally and physically domed by a Latino hunk like myself – people pay top dollar for that kind of experience.

Luckily, I had built my brand on being a witch, so none of my old clients batted an eye when I took this sexy body as my own. In fact, my clientele had expanded exponentially. The allure of getting railed by a muscular Adonis like myself was just irresistible to them.

Although it's all for business, some of the new clients I've acquired since the swap have been incredibly enjoyable to engage with. Take Paul, for example.

He's a pornstar accustomed to playing the dominant role on screen, but he had a secret desire to explore submission. He confided in me that he'd only feel comfortable surrendering control and bottoming if he was physically overpowered by a bigger guy. That's precisely why he sought me out.

The opportunity to fulfill Paul's fantasies was too enticing to pass up. Seeing the excitement and anticipation in his eyes as I took control ignited a fire within me.

With Paul eagerly at my mercy, I wasted no time in asserting my dominance. I started by compelling him to worship my massive pecs. I mean, look at these things — how could you not worship them? I grinned with satisfaction as I held his face against my hairy, sweaty skin, reveling in the sensation of his warm breath against my chest.

"Who's Daddy's good boy?" I praised him, my voice dripping with authority and desire.

Once we had indulged in that initial act of worship, I shifted my focus to his ass. But not before giving it a few firm slaps, just to remind him who was in charge. With each resounding smack, I could feel the anticipation building between us.

As I lowered my mouth to his hole, I made sure to tease and tantalize him, savoring every gasp and moan that escaped his lips. Eventually, he had loosened up enough, his body trembling with anticipation.

With a predatory grin, I withdrew my thick cock and began to rub it teasingly against his eager hole, relishing in the sensation of his tightness against my throbbing member. It was only a matter of time before I claimed him completely, taking what was rightfully mine in a frenzy of lust and desire.

Sensing Paul's nervousness, I decided to assert my dominance even further. With a firm hand, I pushed his head down into the pillow, effectively silencing any protests that might have escaped his lips. There was no room for hesitation in this encounter.

Without further ado, I thrust my cock into his ass relishing in the way he squirmed and moaned beneath me. "How do you like that?" I grunted, my voice thick with desire and authority.

"Keep going," he moaned back, his voice muffled by the pillow and strained with pleasure as he struggled to take it all.

For a while, we continued fucking in that primal, animalistic manner, lost in the throes of passion and desire. But eventually, we switched positions, with Paul taking control as he straddled me in cowboy position.

From underneath, I watched with rapt attention as he rode me, his cock rubbing between my pecs with each thrust. The sight of him pleasuring himself against my body only fueled my desire further, driving me to new heights of ecstasy.

Before long, we both reached the pinnacle of pleasure, our bodies trembling with release as we unleashed our creamy loads in a torrent of passion and desire. It was yet another exhilarating day in the life of the Kink Witch, and I couldn't wait to see what other adventures awaited me.

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zchnlswrld · 1 month

Text

LOVING YOU

MASTERLIST | WC: 8.1K (EXACTLY) | RELEASE DATE: 7TH MAY 2024

NON-IDOL!WOOYOUNG X FEM!READER (X NON-IDOL!SAN)

Synopsis: Loving Jung Wooyoung wasn’t worth it. Loving him wasn’t worth a god damn bone in your body. Yet here you are. Loving Jung Wooyoung made you hurt. It was a pain you were willing to endure for so long.

Warning/s: Angst. Hurt to comfort. Some fluff. Mentions of food and alcohol.

Rina’s notes: This is probably my favourite thing I’ve written kind of gagged! For texts white is someone else and blue is you! Sumin and Ningning what are you doing here?? There may be some spelling and grammar mistakes, I just haven’t had time to clean it up! Not too proud of the ending as I don’t really know how to end stuff sorry!!!!!

Tags: @newworldnet

Loving Jung Wooyoung is like watching your heart getting ripped out and doing nothing to stop it. It’ll happen again so why bother. Your heart aches as he smiles as Sumin knowing full well she’d never love him as much as you do. But what you do know is that she makes him happy and that’s all you can ask for at this point.

The sounds in the cafe had gradually faded out as you watched the pair lovingly gaze into each other’s eyes. They were both so content with being in each other’s presence you’re sure they’d forgotten you were even there with them. Neither of them had spoke to you nor looked in your direction for a while, leaving you to trace your finger in the grooves of your mug.

Your eyes drifted from the couple to the chalkboard above the counter, after reading it you look around the room. You do everything but look at the couple.

“So what about you?” Sumin smiles at you, breaking you out of your daze.

You return the smile, slightly lost, and reply. “What about me?”

“What’s your favourite thing to do? It’d be nice to know you more, seeing as you’re his best friend and all.” It’s always that last line that gets you but she says it so politely you aren’t sure if it was supposed to come off as condescending.

“Oh.” You think for a moment. “I don’t do much. I stay inside.” You give her an awkward smile, looking over at Wooyoung to say something.

He puts his hand on your shoulder and nods. “That’s something though, kiddo.”

Before you can get another word in he lets go of you and continues talking to Sumin about whatever they were before. Slowly you reach into the bag on your lap and pull out your phone. You see San’s name on the screen along with a text message and open it discreetly.

Is everything going alright?

just call pls

i wanna go

Read 13:17

You make an effort to turn your phone off of silent and after a few moments it rings loudly, cutting off the conversation happening next to you. “It’s San.” You place the phone on ear closest to Wooyoung and San says something about needing your help but you don’t really register it. You simply pick up your bag, pull out your wallet, place some money next to your cold drink, wave to the pair and leave. You can hear them both say goodbye but you shut the door just as quickly as you open it.

After leaving you turn the corner and see the pair through the window, they go back to talking as usual. Wooyoung laughing at something Sumin says and you can almost hear his hearty laugh as if you were still in there.

San hears your irregular breaths and his heart breaks for you. “Do you want me to pick you up?”

“He’s so happy.” You let out a shaky sigh.

“I’ll come and get you.” Keys jingle on the other end of the line and you can hear Byeol meow at San for leaving.

“They’re so happy, together.” You study the smile on Wooyoung’s face. He doesn’t cover his mouth with his hand and instead reaches for hers. His smile reaches his eyes, as does hers.

“Wait at Aurora, it’s Hongjoong’s shift.” You nod, although he can’t see it he knows.

Your phone slowly slips back into your bag, you’re not sure if you put the phone down or if San has but you register that it’s no longer in your hand. You finally tear your eyes away from the pair and drag your feet two blocks to Hongjoong and Seonghwa’s store.

It’s a silent walk.

There are no cars on the road. There are no people in the street. There are no birds chirping.

You’re left with your thoughts. Dangerous, really.

This is the first time he’s been so enthusiastic about having you meet someone, he pushed so hard for it and how could you say no to that face. The face you’ve loved so dearly since 8th grade.

She is the first girlfriend of his that had smiled at you and spoke to you and asked about you, something that gains Wooyoung’s stamp of approval. She offered to pay for your drink and even gave you a book you’d been meaning to read that she had on hand. She didn’t judge you for being a homebody nor did she pass comment on it.

Sumin was lovely. That’s what you hated more than anything.

Hongjoong had clearly been warned about your arrival because by the time you arrive there’s a hot chocolate on your usual booth and a small post it note next to it. Your heart clenches at Hongjoong’s gesture, not because it hurts you but because you’d missed being there.

The place was empty, his lunch rush had ended as all the sweet treats on display were gone and Yeosang was wiping tables.

You go straight to the booth quietly, getting a small smile from the man behind the counter as you walk past him. Placing your bag next to you, you pick up the note.

‘It’s on me.’

Simple and short but enough to remind you that’s exactly what Sumin said that made Wooyoung kiss her on the cheek while wrapping his arm around her while you were in line together. Of course Wooyoung was affectionate, he always has been but not like that in a long time. He’d hug and hold hands and give San or Yeosang the occasional kiss on the cheek but that’s where it ended.

You keep staring at the note before wordlessly folding it and putting it at the edge of the table.

“Do you think he doesn’t know?” You’re not sure who you’re speaking to, yourself, Hongjoong or Yeosang.

“Honestly?” Yeosang responds, his voice telling you he’s close. You nod and he sighs. “I don’t think he does.” Looking over at Yeosang he comes and sits opposite you. “I think he’s so wrapped up in his own world he’s not looking right in front of him.”

He watches as you take a sip of the warm drink. It provides no comfort to you as it usually would. You feel empty. Just as you place the drink down you hear San enter.

There’s nothing but pity in his eyes.

The cycle continues and he’s not sure how much longer he can let it go on.

Loving Jung Wooyoung is like being at the beach on a sunny day. It’s warm for a moment before it gets too hot and you get burnt. You’d endured it for so many visits so what’s one more, after all you’ll be out of it soon. It’s hot in the house, there are too many bodies and not one window open. Wooyoung had told you it was a nice gathering between friends and not a full blown party, hence the long sleeve shirt and jeans. He lied to you but at least the rest of the group is here.

“I was hoping to see you again! Our meeting was cut short last time!” Sumin rests her elbow on your shoulder and shouts over the music. She offers you some of her drink but you have your hand to decline it. “You don’t drink?” You shake your head, causing her to laugh. “That’s a shame! We could have been drunk buddies! Wooyoung said you were once!”

Ah. Those times. The reason you stopped drinking. “Not anymore! But thank you for the offer!” She smiles and leaves you alone, going somewhere to the sofa’s to mingle some more.

The music feels like it’s getting louder and you begin playing with your sleeves, scratching up your hand as you do. It begins to hurt but you ignore it the best you can and focus on finding someone you know. Your best bet is Seonghwa being in the kitchen, making sure people drink safely and responsibly so you go there.

It takes some pushing and small excuse me’s that go ignored to get there but in the end you do. He’s keeping it as clean as he can while staying out of everyone’s way, it’s in his nature after all. He silently gives you a comforting smile as you walk his way.

“I didn’t think you come.” He speaks into your ear.

He leans down to your heightso you can reply in the same manner. “I thought it was just us. That’s what he told me.” Seonghwa pulls back, just as confused as you were when you arrived. You pull him back in to defend Wooyoung but he doesn’t give you the chance, instead he speaks to you.

“Friends don’t do that, you know that.” He shakes his head and cleans some cups on the side.

You reply. “It’s just how he is!” But you’re not sure he hears you.

As he busy’s himself you feel your phone vibrating in your pocket. With the amount of times it goes off you could mistake it for a call, but it’s not. It’s Wooyoung.

hey

heyyyyyyy

hey hey hey

are you here

sumin asked if you’re here

you’re bffs now she says

WEREH SO BFFS NWU

that was sumin

d'you make it or not

can it woo

you lied

now where are you?

He leaves you on read and you sigh. Just as you go to put your phone back he pipes up again.

you know i didn’t mean to

welllllll

bathroom

su thinks she’ll be sick

Read 22:13

This time you successfully put your phone away and bid Seonghwa goodbye, although you aren't sure he can hear you considering the volume of the music and the constant chatter. You push through the group of people in the doorway as politely as you can and make a beeline for the stairs.

The crowding on the stairs didn't slow you down, you came to see Wooyoung but now that Sumin is (supposedly) being sick you want to make sure she's alright.

The bathroom door is wide open, a couple in there all over each other, so you knock on his bedroom door just a couple meters away, assuming she's in the suite. You continuously knock without receiving a response. It takes you a couple minutes to decide what to do. You could go downstairs and see someone you know or you could go home or you could go and see Wooyoung like you said you would. How could you ever knowingly let him down?

You shout that you're coming in before opening the door and the sight you're met with makes you freeze. Much like the couple in the bathroom they're all over each other. Lips and hands constantly moving to cover more area. Each movement more desperate than the last as they pull each other closer. You can't watch any longer and slam the door shut behind you as you leave. You don't know if either of them spot you and you don't want to stay long enough to find out.

You shoot down the stairs just as quick as you went up them. Seonghwa watches you from the kitchen doorway and tries stop you however his efforts are in vain when you rip your wrist out of his grip without slowing your pace. He sees you go through the front door and sighs as he catches a glimpse of Wooyoung coming down the stairs.

"Is she here?!" He shouts over the music as best he can, San, Seonghwa and Yunho are all in his line of sight but they all look at him before going back to what they were doing. He does some extra searching around the first level of his house but his efforts come up short. You aren't with any of their mutual friends or your usual spots.

Maybe he was imagining things. Maybe you left after you realised it wasn't a meet up. Maybe you left when he wasn't there when you got here. Maybe you never came at all. Maybe you came upstairs and opened the door and saw him and Sumin before promptly leaving because who would want to walk in on their best friend and their partner making out? He surely wouldn't want to walk in on you doing that.

Wooyoung opens the front door in order to let some air in as he tries to figure out what's going on. After all that over thinking he's quite confused when he sees you sitting on the curb at the end of his house with Yeosang at your side.

He considers walking over to the two of you but you lean your head against Yeosang’s shoulder and he decides to stay back. He watched from afar as you speak to each other, he can’t make any of it out and he assumes by the closeness that he should leave it alone.

“I just went in. I knocked by no one answered. I upset myself in theory.” You laugh quietly.

He shakes his head. “Not really. You thought she was being sick. Wooyoung doesn’t like sick so you did what you thought was right.”

“It’s his room and I just walked.” You look down and shuffle your feet uncomfortably, thinking back to the scene.

“You usually do, it’s nothing new.” He peers over his shoulder as best as he can and he’s sure he sees Wooyoung watching you from the corner of his eye. Wooyoung notices and pushes the door shut slightly to cover himself.

“I just want to go home now.” You stand up and Yeosang follows suit.

He reaches out for you but you start walking away. “Let’s get something to eat. You’ll just sit and wallow in self pity at home.”

“It’s better than seeing them.” You wipe your eyes, a movement both boys watching you catch up on. Before Wooyoung can even consider comforting you his friend jogs slightly to catch up to you.

He goes back inside and shuts the door behind him. Both you and Yeosang hear the door shut and you look at him as he sighs. He reaches out to wipe your tears and pulls your eyes away from the door.

“What do you want to eat, hm?”

Loving Jung Wooyoung is like watching snow fall and land on wet pavement. The snow won’t settle, so why try. It's so pretty but at what cost? Wooyoung looks at Sumin with so much love, it's the same way you look at him San says. But if it was why can everybody but him see it?

"Did you end up coming over last week?" Sumin diverts the conversation towards you, getting too shy to talk as Wooyoung stares at her.

You wave your hand dismissively and swallow your drink. Her question makes Wooyoung look at you and you softly punch his shoulder as he sits next to you. “Only for a couple minutes because someone said it was a gathering between friends, not a party with everyone he knows.” He laughs and so do you to hide how annoyed you really are, this makes San stare at you from across the table but you slightly shake your head at him.

“Oh!” Sumin exclaims. “Wooyoung said you guys used to party all the time. Are they not your scene?”

“They never really have been, I only went because I was 18 and he wanted me out my dorm room.” You sigh.

“Books were your life back then, one of us had to do it.” San pipes up, sipping his coffee, amused. The other three laugh as you jokingly frown at San.

Silence falls over the table as all of you dig into the cakes in front of you and drink your lukewarm beverages. You can see San’s eyes flick from you to the couple as they feed each other, you try to pay no mind to it but he watches your shoulders slump the tiniest bit more and he can’t help but feel pity for you.

It’s past the lunch rush for Aurora hence the group gathering but you can’t help but feel like an outsider to the other three. Wooyoung and Sumin being in love and San not having to battle the same feelings as you makes it easy for him to speak. But every movement you make has you second guessing yourself. For comfort you end up watching Wooyoung, something you’ve done for a long time that you aren’t quite sure you can give up.

He’s so pretty and lovely and caring and kind and the thought of all that makes you want to fall for him all over again. He’s so happy to watch Sumin talk to San even though he’s the biggest chatterbox at the table, he’s so content that they’re getting along. His eyes tell you everything you need to know about how he feels and as comforting as they are how easily you can read them hurts. Because it’s not for you.

Sumin smiles at you and you shoot her one back. She doesn’t seem hurt or jealous or angry that you’re staring at her boyfriend, there’s an unreadable emotion in her eye that you can’t pinpoint but you know it’s not negative. San spots your interaction and sees you ever so slightly cringe and curl into yourself.

He takes this as a sign to go, as much as he knows you want to stay for Wooyoung (just for it to be like old times once more) he can’t bare the sight of you working yourself up and feeling like you make people uncomfortable. He’s seen it all before but this time it seems to be worse. Maybe it’s because he can see how in love Wooyoung is, how both of you know Sumin is the one for him and this is it, how you wished to be loved the way you love him. San stands up with a smile “I’ll pay for this one, Wooyoung you’re paying for the next.”

“You’re going?” Wooyoung goes to take his wallet to pay his and Simon’s portion but his friend dismisses just as fast.

“Mhm, we have to take Byeol to the vet. You know my sister doesn’t like doing it and I don’t like going alone.” He gestures for you to get up, which you do.

Wooyoung reaches out for your hand as you step out the booth and you feel him just graze your wrist, his movements causing you to move back. His touch burns, it hurts and you’re not sure why. All you know is that you can’t see him right now because everything is starting to hurt.

You can see Sumin from the corner of your eye as the gears begin turning in her head and she connects dots you wished she couldn’t. She’d caught you.

Quickly, you wave bye to the couple and Seonghwa behind the counter as he finishes up his shift and leave San to pay. Wooyoung considers going after you but Sumin shakes her head and he doesn’t. “Girl to girl, don’t worry.” Is enough for him to leave it alone. You’d never spoke to him about ‘girl problems’ before so if she knew, that was already more than him.

San comes outside and sees you sat on the curb with your hand on your chest. He can’t tell if you’re trying to slow your heartbeat or steady your breathing but he leaves you to it until you’re ready to talk.

“I’m a terrible person, San.” You look over your shoulder at him. “I like a guy with a girlfriend and she knows but that’s barely changed anything.”

“You don’t just like him, you’ve loved him since we were kids. No partner has ever changed that for you. You aren’t a terrible person, not when you liked him first.” He tries to reason. He reaches out to you and helps you stand up.

The pair of you walk to his car in complete silence. There’s nothing else that can be said because he’s right.

The car isn’t too far, just down the road, but it gives you time to think about your next steps. You could either come clean and move on, never mention it again or apologise to Sumin. Coming clean could ruin everything though and suffering in silence for too long can ruin a person but you have nothing to apologise for. You’re stuck in an endless loop of hurt.

As you slip into the passenger seat you can feel the dreaded vibration of your phone in your pocket. You don’t open the message, instead watch it come in on your lock screen.

I don’t blame you. You’ve known him for much longer and he cares about you. You haven’t done anything to come in between us so I can’t fault you. I won’t say anything if you don’t feel comfortable with it.

“Sumin knows.” You read the message out to San before turning your phone off in your lap.

“And how does that make you feel?” He tries to be empathetic as he starts the car.

“Pathetic.” Your phone lights up one more time but you flip it over after reading the next message.

Just don’t hurt yourself more than you have. A boy isn’t worth that much.

Loving Jung Wooyoung is like watching the cherry blossoms flower and then counting the petals as they fall. The petals, although beautiful, are eventually forgotten about. You sit at the kitchen island, staring at the clock above the oven. 10:23pm.

Sighing you open your text thread with Wooyoung once again and check if he’s read any.

Today 11:14

what’s the plan then dude

it’s the 17th

Today 14:22

you missed the last one

you said we’d watch two movies to make up for it

doctor strange isn’t gonna watch itself??

Today 17:36

what are we doing????

wooooooyuuuuuuu

is it off??

Today 19:12

san came instead

thanks for letting me know you weren’t coming

Delivered

Just as you go to turn it off and head to bed you watch the ‘Delivered’ switch to ‘Read 10:24’ and your heart drops but you’re not sure why.

When it comes to Wooyoung you’re not sure about a lot of things but there’s not much you can do about it. You’re so used to feeling that way that, to you, at the end of the day it is what it is. It’s how you feel and you can’t help that, you just have to learn how to navigate it.

Your phone rings and you see his caller ID. Hesitantly you pick up, Lord knows what he’s going to say but you hope it’s along the lines of sorry.

“What’s with you and San recently?” He exhales.

You laugh quietly, he’s the pathetic one now. “Not even a hello?”

“I don’t show up so you replace me with San yet again?” You can hear shuffles on the other end of the line.

“Was I supposed to stay by myself on the day we have reserved for each ot- wait, you didn’t show up you’re right!” After turning the lights out and shutting off any electrics you need to, you go to your bedroom and put your phone on charge. “Hold on, you’re on speaker.”

“We were supposed to watch Doctor Strange together!” He argues.

You laugh at him, amused once again. “Wooyoung you didn’t show up and didn’t even tell me, how was I supposed to know you wanted to watch it with me when you didn’t have the decency to text me?”

“I forgot! I went out with Sumin and my time was taken up!”

“So why are you mad at me!”

The line goes quiet and you’re sure he’s put the phone down. After hearing some more shuffling from him that theory doesn’t stand. Either way he still doesn’t say anything.

“I don’t know actually.”

“Meeting on the 17th is our thing and you forgot, we’ve done it every month since we were 15 Woo. You forgot, it was something you wanted to do and now you’re mad at me because I didn’t want to be alone.”

“I know, I’m sorry.”

“Are you?”

He falls quiet again and this time you put the phone down. You’re already hurting after being ditched but being ditched for Sumin (even though they’re together) on your day made it still just that tiny bit more.

You watch his caller ID show up on your phone again but you turn it off and flip it over on your nightstand. Before you lay in bed you flip down the picture of you and Wooyoung at your graduation that sat next to it.

He’d never forgotten before, he used to make a point that it was your thing not only to his partners but your own friendship group and yet he’s the one forgetting. He’s the one who’d got your hopes up only to leave you hanging.

You lay awake that night, overthinking. Staring at the ceiling of glow in the dark stars you and Wooyoung put up one night after watching The Blair Witch. Regardless of how you feel about him a friend doesn’t do this to a friend. He didn’t forget to go bowling with Mingi and Yunho. He didn’t forget to go to the lakes with Jongho. He had meetings with Sumin those days too. Were you just that forgettable?

Quickly you text your best friend, feelingly conflicted after putting the phone down and being shouted at for something that was entirely his fault.

it’s our thing

you left me and that’s on you

Delivered

You keep your phone open on the message screen expecting Wooyoung to be awake considering you know he has the next (or current, depending on how you see it) day off however nothing comes.

Instead you watch the ‘Delivered’ switch to ‘Read 04:25’ with no response.

Loving Jung Wooyoung is like flipping through an old photobook as you fantasise about what could have been. It had been a while since the whole group were together (in a calm setting) but it had been a long time coming seeing how busy you had all been.

You can’t stay mad at Wooyoung for long, it’s been a week and you’re currently sat next to him on Ningning’s couch as she pulls out your yearbook. “Here he is,” she covers Wooyoung’s picture and shows it to Sumin who’s also sat next to him “we did let him walk around like this. I can only apologise.” She takes her hand off the picture and she immediately laughs.

“This is you?!” She points at her boyfriend only for him to look down and laugh. The rest of you laugh as well and she scoffs in amusement. Her eyes scan over the rest of the page. “You were all in the same class, that sounds like trouble.” She mutters jokingly.

“If you were looking for trouble it was these two.” Seonghwa point to you and Wooyoung. “Team Rocket over there.” He rolls his eyes, thinking of the many times he or Hongjoong had to free you from detention.

You lean back and pout. “It wasn’t even me, it was all him and I was taken in by association!”

“Maybe you shouldn’t have associated with me then!” He fires back just as fast.

“Sometimes I wish I didn’t!” Both of you roll your eyes at the same time causing the others to laugh once again.

It was nice to be in a friendly setting with everyone rather than stuck in a small space with the couple. You’d been seeing them at random times of the week, Wooyoung being the one inviting you out never Sumin. She text you from time to time however it was mainly to ask how San was and if you would both be seeing them soon as a group.

“How did everyone become friends then? I’ve never been with you all at the same time to know.” Sumin hand’s back the yearbook to Ningning and looks around expectantly.

“Ning and I are childhood friends.” You start.

“Then hell-spawn moved in next door.” Ningning glares at Wooyoung who does the same back.

Yunho smiles at the pair. “Mingi and I met them in middle school after Wooyoung tripped Ning into Mingi.”

“Jongho and I were always in the same classes and clubs.” You add.

“Seonghwa, Hongjoong and Yeosang were in the high school student committee so they were running into these two all the time.” Mingi points to you and Wooyoung who frown at him.

Wooyoung mumbles quietly “No need to add that.” making Sumin laugh.

“And San joined my home room and just never left.” You smile at him which he returns pretty quickly. “Made me show him around the whole school only to find out he didn’t even go there.”

Sumin’s jaw drops in disbelief as she looks at San who nods with a cheeky smile. “Wow so you really have been friends for years!” She looks over the room. “It’s really nice to have you all be so welcoming no matter how long we’ve known each other.”

“Don’t worry about it, anyway come with me. I have so many good pictures of Wooyoung, you have to see them.” Ningning stands up and offers a hand to Sumin which she quickly takes, standing up too.

As they leave to the hallway people begin to funnel out of the front room and you follow Yeosang to the kitchen. You both silently make yourself drinks as well as pour some extras for everyone else. There’s a quiet sound of chatting coming from behind but you and Yeosang continue in silence.

He watches over you with a look that asks how you are and all you can do is shrug, there’s not much you can do about how you feel but live with it, you have for years anyway.

A call of your name from the hallway takes your attention away from the silent conversation so you put your drink down and instead you go and join the other girls as they look at photos. Sumin points to a picture on the wall of you and Wooyoung, both of you in relatively formal outfits that match to a certain level. “When was this?” She seems so innocently intrigued that you take it off the wall and let her hold it. She brings it closer to her face and comments about how small you both were.

You’re both stood next to each other timidly, his hand holding yours as you both smile. His purple tie matching your purple dress. The picture was taken by your mom but Ningning had begged for a copy.

“The night after graduation, right?” Ningning leans it towards herself slightly.

The night after graduation. The night where Wooyoung pulled you away from the makeshift gathering you and everyone else in your year were having to tell you that he decided not to go to his dream college even though he was accepted. He told you he couldn’t go because he didn’t want to be far away from you because best friends don’t just up and leave each other.

The night where you almost had your first kiss, with Wooyoung at that. The only reason it didn’t happen was because Seonghwa thought something bad had happened (you guys were away for 30 minutes to be fair) but instead walked in on your lips just barely grazing each others. He left but that didn’t matter because the moment was gone. So you both settled on holding each other close and slow dancing until you were too tired to do it anymore.

The night your crush on Wooyoung came into full effect and you fully believed that the moment between you at the gathering would lead to something more but instead it went unaddressed and ignored. Your heart clenches at the memory and you have to physically stop yourself from clutching your heart.

Ningning breaks you out of your daze by asking the same question as Sumin. She watches your heartbreak for your younger self as you think of the night, after all besides Seonghwa who saw you she the only other person who knows fully what happened that night. “Yeah, we had to make our own prom because our senior pranks went too far.” Both you and Ningning laugh at the memories while Sumin continues to look at the picture.

“Wooyoung come look at this!” She exclaims. He pops around the corner and she passes the framed picture to him. He falls silent just as you did and looks up at you. “You two were so little.”

“We were indeed.”

“You were matching too.”

“She had no other friends, someone had to go with her.” He laughs to himself before leaving quickly, Sumin follows after him while asking about the senior pranks he had commit.

Ningning turns to you and places her hand on your shoulder, she strokes the are with her thumb. She’s given you the same look so many times you don’t have to speak to her to know what she’s going to say, it’s not like you could do anything about it anyway.

“Let it go, it’s fine.”

“No it’s not.” She tries to reason but you’ve already pushed her hand away from you and joined everyone else as they gather around the front room once more.

Loving Jung Wooyoung was like watching flowers die. Originally you cared for them but as time passes you realise can’t keep holding onto them. You realised this when Sumin text you last night asking if you and San would want to meet her and her boyfriend in a couple days to hang out. (She didn’t explicitly say ‘her boyfriend’ but saying ‘my Wooyoung’ was enough to make it sting a little.)

You responded to her a few hours later reminding her you and Wooyoung have plans, a text she leaves on delivered but you know she’s read it. So you’re confused when she walks in before your friend, she thanks him for holding the door for you and waves at you.

Wooyoung pulls out a chair for her across from you and then sits next to her. “I couldn’t leave Su behind, not if we’re coming here.” He holds her hand on the table. “It feels like it’s our place now.” You’re taken aback but you feel so much different from last time. You feel hollow, like an empty can that’s being kicked as someone walks down the street. It doesn’t hurt as much as you think it would, as much as it usually does.

“So what did you wanna see me for?” He keeps his body facing Sumin but looks your way.

“Just a catch up is all, we haven’t seen each other in a while.” Your statement makes the atmosphere awkward. You all know why you haven’t seen each other but it goes unsaid and instead makes Sumin put her head down awkwardly.

You lean back in your chair and cross your leg over the other. “How have you guys been then?”

“Well, we’ve been alright.” Wooyoung starts. “Su met my parents recently, that happened too.”

She nods. “They’re really nice.”

“How are you?” He follows up, looking away from Sumin.

“I’ve been good. San, Yunho and I have been hanging out loads, we’re going bowling with Ningning and Yeosang next Saturday so, yeah, I’ve been busy.”

Wooyoung leans back too, confused. “Where was the invite?” He tries to joke but it doesn’t come off as one.

“We sorted it in the group chat, you never replied so we thought you were busy.”

“Well I’m sure we can come right?” He looks over to Sumin who agrees, stating that their calendars are empty.

You shake your head and look down at the table. “We already booked it for five. We planned it like two weeks ago so.”

The table falls silent. None of you are too sure what to talk about. It’s true, you did call Wooyoung to catch up and hang out but with or without Sumin there wasn’t much to talk about. How do you catchup with your best friend who’s supposed to know everything about you? He spent all him time with his girlfriend, which is understandable, but it felt like he was leaving you behind. Not only you but the rest of the group.

There was nothing you could talk about, leaving the three of you sitting quietly looking around the cafe. It wasn’t the same as last time, this time you weren’t doing it because you were hurt or upset and didn’t want to look at the couple. This time you were doing it because it was awkward and there was nothing else you could say. You wanted to reconnect to Wooyoung but you didn’t know where to start.

You wanted to be his friend again.

That small realisation hits you hard. You weren’t stuck on him. You wanted to go back to the way it was before. You’d have to relearn everything about him but you were willing to do it if it all felt normal again.

There’s nothing you can say to fill the silence at the moment. All of you shift uncomfortably. Wooyoung wants to see you, Sumin doesn’t want to do anything that could upset you considering she knows (well, knew) about your feelings towards her boyfriend and you’re fighting yourself on what to do.

“I think I should go.” You announce, you aren’t sure to who but they both seem to take it on board. “I’ll see you around.”

You and Sumin give Wooyoung no time to argue as she assumes your seat and you leave, she smiles at you softly on your way out which you reciprocate quietly.

The scene mirrors the one when you first met her, only this time she knows you’re watching through the window but she pays no mind to them. You watch as she talks his ear off while he nods and agrees every now and then. He stares at her with an emotion you can’t quite read, perhaps you weren’t in love enough to know if it’s a stage of that or not.

Before you can think about your next steps your phone rings and you’re quick to pick up. “Hello, San.”

He makes a small sound of shock. “You sound much more joyful than I would have expected.”

Taking your eyes away from them you look up at the clear sky. “Yeah, well, it’s a good day.”

“That’s good.” San sounds just as content as you. “That’s what acceptance is like.”

“How would you know?” As if your brain is working on autopilot you begin walking toward Aurora.

You can hear some sort of movement on the other end of the line. “We’ve all been through it at least once.” Hearing Byeol meow at San as he walks past her makes you both laugh, her volume will never daily to make you smile.

Both of you stay quiet, the silence isn’t awakened like earlier or sad like last time, it’s nice. Neither of you had to fill the space or force anything, you see each other so often now that there’s nothing to update on.

His car door slams and his keys jingle. “Aurora?”

“Yeah.” Smiling, you cut the call off with the small cafe in sight.

Loving yourself after so long is like having a picnic in Summer. It’s bright. It’s warm. It’s enjoyable. San sits across from you on your blanket, empty food boxes around you and bottles of fizzy leaning against your leg, staring you down while he paints. He pouts as the 30 minute timer goes off, cutting off his playlist when it does.

“Hey drop the pout! At least you’re not doing this with Hongjoong or Yeosang, they would have wiped the floor with both of us.” San pulls his painting closer to himself as you reach out for his. “Come on, I worked hard on this!” You plead but he shakes his head.

“Five more minutes?”

“No, we can flip them at the same time-“

“But you’re so much better than me at drawing!”

“I’m literally not!”

He finishes up some details before hesitantly handing you the small canvas, you do the same with a smile and at the same time you both flip them over to see the paintings.

San had (poorly) painted a portrait of you in the park you were sat in with the exact same setting behind you, a stream and flowers behind you. There were a few ducks painted on there too, all sat in a line. You smile at the painting, making San smile too.

He checks over your picture and immediately spots Byeol in the corner. It makes him smile, how much you love that cat.

“What do you think?”

“It’s perfect, I’ll put it up in my home office.” He puts the picture down and admires you staring down at his portrait.

You turn the paintings face up and leave them on the blanket to dry in the sun while you begin to eat any remaining snacks and fruit.

The whole experience is calming and comforting. “Next time we’ll have to bring Ningning and Jongho. There’s something there, I’m telling you.“ San laughs and shakes his head before offering you to feed you a strawberry which you gladly bite. “There is something there! There always has been! I’m telling you San!”

“Or we could bring Byeol on a harness and leash.”

“Why didn’t you say before we left?! She’s home alone on a nice day and we could have brought her with us!” Your phone begins to vibrate, presumably with texts, which you ignore to continue talking. “Next time it’s nice out we will.”

“Alright, promise?” He reaches his pinky over to you and you lock them. “Promised. Now are you going to get that?”

You push your thumb against his with a small smile. “We had to make it official first.”

Once you let go you pick up your phone, opening it quickly to see where the notifications were from only to see _ on your messages. Opening the app you realise they’re all from Wooyoung.

Today 13:16

r u busy rn

can I come over

I’m freaking out rn

I think su is done with me

what do I do

what do women do

how do I apologise

nvm she doesn’t want me to apologise

she wants time

what does that mean

i’m out with san right now

i told you two days ago

but it’s our first fight

you should probably message hongjoong

he’s good with stuff like this

pleas dude

wooyoung i can’t help

sorry

You put your phone back down without awaiting his response. “He fought with Sumin and he wants to know what to do.”

“Are you going to see him then?” San seems slightly nervous about your answer which thankfully goes unnoticed by you. Once you shake your head you can see him visibly relax.

Lying back you laugh at him. “Why would I?”

“You usually do.” He reasons, moving to sit down next to you.

“Fair.” You turn your head towards him and squint to see him. “Well, I’m here with you so there's no need to go anywhere. do you want me to go?"

San lifts up his hand to block the sun out of your eyes, letting you look at him properly. "No." He shakes his head while biting his lip.

"Then I won't." You move your own hand away from your eyes and rest it on your stomach as you close your eyes. "It's been really nice today, thank you. I think we should do this more often, with Byeol next time."

"That would be nice." He's thankful that you can't see him because he's sure that the face he's pulling right now isn't the best, he's trying to find the right words for what he's about to ask. "Do you think we could, possibly, may- Never mind actually.” He shakes his head and looks around the park awkwardly.

“Maybe next time we could make it a date. I don’t want to jump into anything now after everything but I think, if you’re willing to wait, we could try.” You turn your head away from San and sigh.

He smiles to himself. “I’ve waited for a while, what’s a couple more months.” Both of you quietly laugh at his comment. “Don’t fall asleep now, we’re yet to go on the swings.”

“Oh, leave me alone! I’m just resting my eyes!”

Loving you is like dreaming. It’s so incredible, it’s everything you want. Except when you when up you have to face reality and it’s difficult. That’s how Wooyoung feels as he watches you laugh at a joke Yunho says he doesn’t find all that funny, maybe it’s because he leaned in and told you personally and Mingi and Yeosang laughed because they just caught him saying it. You laugh so hard a hand rests on your stomach while the other hits Yunho’s shoulder.

“You’re staring holes into him.” Jongho comments beside him. Wooyoung continues to watch you from the other end of the table as you place some meat from the small barbecue onto Mingi and Yeosang’s rice while telling Yunho to get his own. “Wooyoung eat your food or go.” Jongho repeats your gesture but gives himself and his sulking friend meat instead, Seonghwa scolding him as he does.

Ningning sits across from Wooyoung and shakes her head. She glances over at San who watches you attentively, a smile slowly forming on her face. He stares at you with that same look you used to have when staring at Wooyoung and it’s enough to let her know you’ll be alright. She’s glad it’s him. Anyone else and she would have had her doubts but San stuck with you throughout all your hardships and struggles, even if he hurt himself along the way. Again, much like you did with Wooyoung but you’re past him now.

Wooyoung looks across at Ningning and follows her eyes to San. He’s brought straight back to reality. A cold feeling washes over him. He’s confused but when everything clicks his heart burns. His face mimics yours when you first met Sumin as he begins to notice all those small things he didn’t before.

How you left soon after meeting Sumin. When you lied about seeing them together that night (something neither of you have ever addressed, he’s not sure why). Why you were upset about being left on your day. All the uncomfortable moments and shifting when they spoke to you about you.

“It’s not… fair.” He whispers, Jongho is the only person that catches it and watches him leave. The group turns to him as his seat screeches when he leaves. He meets your eyes and for a second he spots understanding which is then followed by guilt. Jongho goes after him as he makes his exit, leaving everyone else to continue their conversations and eating.

Ningning follows suit too, leaving the two hotheads alone would result in an outburst you don’t deserve and as your longest friend all she ever wanted was your happiness. Wooyoung’s ruined it once she she’ll be damned if she lets it happen again.

Both Jongho and Ningning stare at him with pity as he watches you, San and Yunho laugh together. “It’s as if I hadn’t just left. I feel so-“

“Invisible?” Ningning leans towards him slightly. He nods and looks between you and San. “You can’t expect her to pay attention to you all the time.”

Wooyoung doesn’t come back inside even after Ningning and Jongho do instead the pair of them watch him through the window as he leaves. Both you and San see him from the corner of your eyes but by the time you’re properly looking he’s gone.

Instead he walks all the way back home, leaving his stuff behind in the process. It’s late and the street lights barely work but he’d rather be alone. It’s probably not the best to be alone with his own thoughts and feelings but it’s better than seeing you and San.

In the restaurant Jongho and Ningning watch their friend’s phone vibrate, it’s the third time ‘Sumin 💕🎀’ has shown up on the screen. Both of them leave it alone as they continue eating.

There’s nothing they could do but watch the cycle repeat. You’d both put each other through it unknowingly, only a little too late.

207 notes · View notes

artificial-transmutations · 9 months

Text

Beating Recession

Recession sucked, that much was clear to Logan even before he checked his email inbox. When he saw a few replies to his job applications from the last days, he sighed. He didn't need to open the mails to know that the news was bad, but he did so anyway.

"We regret to inform you..." - Logan didn't even read on. He had lost his job as an apprentice electrician about half a year ago. The company was going under, and Logan, the youngest and least experienced worker, was the first to go. That's how it was in this business. Since then, he had applied to every single position that came up - but apparently, the current economic situation was so bad that nobody needed another worker.

Logan had hoped that his apprenticeship would get him a job, but the fact that he was only 20 and had not much practical experience hurt him. Slowly, money was becoming a pretty big problem. Whatever savings he had (for some real estate of his own! As if that was going to happen!) had melted away over the last months. His rent was due, and he had no income.

In fact, he was one month late with his rent already, and although his landlord had been cool about it, Logan did not see how he would be able to keep his apartment. He really, really wanted to avoid moving back in with his parents who had their own problems, too.

So, what was he going to do? There wasn't much more to do than keep looking for a job, even though his chances were slim.

He opened LinkedOut and looked for openings, just as he had done multiple times before this week. The sparse list of jobs had not changed, so Logan scrolled on.

He was about to give up again when a listing caught his eye.

"Escape unemployment today! Change™ job agency will find the perfect job, for the perfect you. Apply here!"

He had heard of such agencies before, and the results were not pretty. Usually, they just took the applicants' data and sold it on. They would claim to have found a job for you, but it usually wouldn't work out, and the applicant would have paid money for this useless service. Still, Logan was curious enough to click the link. If they wanted money, he would back out immediately - it was not like he had any to spare.

To Logan's big surprise, when he clicked the link, a new page opened, with a web-based chat interface. Before he could close the tab again, there was already a message in the window. It read:

"Kevin: Hey, and welcome to the Change™ job agency. My name is Kevin. How may I help you today?"

It was a nice surprise that they didn't try to sell him anything or even ask for his data before he had entered the website. Well, no harm done. He might as well give them a try. Hesitating slightly, Logan's fingers hovered over the keyboard before he typed:

"Hi. I'm Logan and I'm looking for a new job."

The answer came quickly, but not so quickly that Logan would suspect the other person to be a chatbot. After some moments, Kevin's reply appeared on the screen:

"Great. What kind of job are you looking for? And what kind of salary are we talking?"

Logan considered the questions. This was probably the point where they would ask him for his data. He silently cursed his excessive caution. Of course, they had to ask these questions. How else should they offer him anything?

"Uhm. My last job was as an apprentice electrician, but at this point I would be pretty happy about just any job. The salary should be high enough to pay my rent."

Logan hesitated before hitting enter. He didn't want to come over as quite so desperate, but the truth was, he was.

"Okay, no problem. Do you have a preferred working sector?"

What a weird question. Why did it matter what industry he preferred?

"Uhm, not really. I guess anything is fine."

"Very well. Before I look up what's there in our database, I would need some basic information about you. Namely gender, age, ethnicity and sexual orientation."

"Wait. What does my sexual orientation have to do with a job? Besides, why do you need to know my ethnicity? Is this even legal?"

Logan had typed furiously and pressed enter before thinking about his reply.

"I understand your confusion. We here at the Change™ job agency strive to find not only a job, but the best job for the best you, so we need to know what we're working with. It wouldn't be very appropriate to apply a person as an actress who is really good at sports, now would it? Of course, you have to understand that your answers are confidential and will not be disclosed to any third parties, especially not your future employer."

That was fishy deluxe. Logan really didn't want to feed some unknown job agency all that highly personal information. On the other hand,... what did he have to lose?

"Well, I guess it can't hurt. Uhm. I'm a male, 20 years old, I would call myself white and I'm heterosexual."

"Wonderful. One last question: Are you comfortable with nudity and public sexual activities?"

"Wait, WHAT? I mean, uhm, sure, I guess? I mean, why should I need that?"

"This question is purely to determine if we should also have a look in the adult entertainment section of our job offerings. Alright Logan, please stand by while I enter your data into our search engine."

Logan leaned back. He felt a bit uneasy about all that. But it was not like his answers could lead them directly to his apartment, so he felt relatively safe.

A minute or so passed, and Logan started to think that he had been tricked after all, but just as he was about to close the tab, a new message appeared.

"Sorry for the delay, I had a few calls. We found two jobs that could be a fit. The first one is an office job in a big insurance company. To be honest, it's not that good of a fit and it doesn't pay very well either."

"That's fine." Logan wrote. He was incredibly on edge now. Could it really be so easy to find a new job? And he even had a choice?

"What's the other one?" he added to his previous message.

"Okay, the other job is a bit more unconventional, but we have the feeling it could be a great match. It's an actor position in the porn industry, at the famous XXX Incorporated."

"Porn? What? Are you serious? I mean, I don't have anything against porn or nudity or whatever, but I'm not sure if this is the kind of job I want."

Logan felt mixed feelings. The prospect of being some office drone sounded pretty uninteresting and a low pay wasn't all that good either. But a porn actor? Logan had to admit, the thought felt somewhat interesting, but he doubted he had what it took for that? Weren't porn stars famously hung and well-built? That was certainly not Logan. Just as he pondered those thoughts, Kevin's answer appeared:

"I understand Sir. So, should we continue with the first job opening then?"

Logan bit his lip, but the curiosity got the better of him.

"Wait. What does the second job entail? I mean, I'm not exactly... equipped for the porn business."

"Well, as I have said: It's an actor position, so you would star in some new adult entertainment productions. While I understand your modesty, our records show that you are more than adequately gifted for this kind of job."

Logan felt confused. He absentmindedly scratched his crotch before he replied:

"Uhm, sorry, I don't think you understand. I don't really think my..." Logan paused. Was he really going to write that? It was embarrassing, but at least he could be reasonably sure he would never meet this Kevin in real life. So, he continued:

"... penis is big enough for such a position."

The answer came promptly.

"Really? Better have a look to be sure ;-)"

A winking smiley? That wasn't very professional. Actually, the whole sentence wasn't. Still, Logan couldn't stop himself from glancing at his crotch. What he saw made him take a double take. His soft cock was forming a visible and ample bulge in his jeans. Logan knew that he was slightly smaller than average, so that was ridiculous. It was almost a... a porn star-sized bulge!

He stared at his package, but it wasn't growing any smaller. With trembling hands, he opened his jeans. Immediately, a well-filled pair of boxers escaped the confinement of his jeans. The dick print of his soft member was clearly visible in his underwear, and it wasn't just much bigger than Logan remembered. It was among the biggest bulges he had ever seen in his life!

His hands explored the impressive manhood through his underwear and felt every centimeter of the hardening dick. He had no idea what had caused this growth, but he wasn't complaining. Before he could interact more with it, however, he noticed another message on the screen.

"Are you still there, Sir?"

"Sorry, yes." Logan hurried to reply. What was he going to write? "I was below average just a few moments ago but now I have one of the biggest cocks in human history"?

Instead, Kevin answered.

"Good! I trust you had a chance to inspect your assets?"

"Uhm, yes."

"So, have you made up your mind, or should I look into the office position?"

Logan was torn. He wasn't sure what he had seen just a moment ago. Still, his enormous cock that was half-hard in his boxers was there, undeniably.

"Let's go with the porn star position." Logan finally typed, and his heart was racing.

"Very good! Now, as I mentioned, the position is in the adult entertainment sector. Do you know the company XXX Incorporated?"

Logan thought quickly about it before replying: "No, sorry, never heard of them."

"That is not at all surprising, since they specialize in the adult sector for homosexual men. According to your data, you identify as heterosexual. I hope that won't be a problem?"

Of course, there was a catch. Logan had heard about these gay for pay people and he hesitated yet again. They paid well, supposedly, but...

"Uhm. Would that mean I would need to be on the receiving end?" He wasn't too close-minded and could imagine kissing another man if he had to, perhaps even receiving a blow job from one. But having another person fuck him in the ass? No, that was way beyond his comfort zone.

"I believe the technical term you are looking for is 'to bottom'." Kevin replied, and added another message shortly after:

"But the company is, in fact, looking for a 'top' actor. They put it like this: 'We are looking for a well-built top for our new productions.'"

Logan was relieved. While he was a gold star gay man (why did he put 'heterosexual'? That was utter bullshit!), he was a strict top. This position sounded better and better. Still, one thing raised some new doubts.

"Hold on. I'm hung like a horse, but I wouldn't say I'm very muscular or even fit. I'm not much of a gym goer."

"Are you sure ;-)?"

Again, with the winking smiley! Kevin sounded so very professional most of the time, but then there were these messages. Logan scratched the back of his shoulder with some effort. Whenever he raised his arms so high the mountains of muscle on his upper arms danced and made it difficult to reach his back. Logan suddenly realized that something had changed - again! His shirt strained against his muscular chest, and as he lifted his shirt, he could see some cobblestone abs on an otherwise flat stomach. His calves had become thicker and strong. His jeans, which had felt slightly loose earlier, now seemed to be getting tighter.

Logan had never been very athletic. His body was lean, but not fit or muscular. That had certainly changed. When he looked at himself, he hardly recognized himself anymore. A huge dick, and a studly body.

Logan shook his head and let the shirt fall again. Whatever was going on, it was not a bad thing, was it?

"Alright, so I'm a buff top with a big cock. Is there anything else?" he smiled as he wrote that.

"Actually, there is one further requirement, but given your cooperation so far I don't believe it will be much of a problem either." Kevin replied, in his professional tone again.

"And what would that be?" Logan was intrigued.

"The company is especially looking for a, and I cite, 'huge, dominant Black top with large dick. Intellectual capabilities are not required'. Are you feeling up to that task? ;-)"

This time, Logan immediately raised his shirt to watch his body change. As soon as he read the words, his skin began darkening, first a golden bronze and then a rich black. It was a gradual change but happened very quickly. His muscles became even more defined, and his body hair thickened and grew even darker.

He didn't know what 'intellectual capabilities' meant, but as his body grew larger and thicker, he felt a strange fog entering his mind. It was a little unsettling at first, but it wasn't entirely unpleasant. His usual thoughts quickly became overshadowed by his raising libido. As he grabbed his huge, Black throbbing cock, a dominant smirk crept on his mouth.

He turned his attention back to the computer and typed:

"Yeah, baby. I think I can make that happen. Just tell me who to fuck and I'll be there!"

He saw Kevin reply with a street address and a date and time, but Logan decided he would read that later. Now, his cock demanded his entire attention. He absentmindedly noticed his webcam turning on but paid it little attention. If Kevin wanted to watch him jerk his fat cock, he was very welcome to. After all, he just helped him find the job of his life!

That's certainly a way to beat recession! Also check out this blog!

#male transformation #muscle transformation #straight to gay #dumbing down #racial transformation

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callmelola111 · 9 months

Text

loser!ellie ♡ dating app headcanons

synopsis: totally sfw hc’s of loser!ellie (modern au) on dating apps, including a cute little 1st date scenario. basically just pure fluff !!!

| 𓆣 | pairing & wc: ellie williams x reader. wc: 1.4k

a/n: never written headcanons before, crazy ass shit. idk if i did it exactly right but i think it will be an entertaining read no matter what. i’ve recently caved and downloaded hinge which is what inspired this---but there’s only like 40 gay bitches on there and that’s it (also like no mascs?? i’m attracted to any kind of non-man but still,,, the shortage is real y’all). ALSO let me know if this is something you’d like a nsfw/smut part 2 of. much loveeee ♡~ lola

| ❀ | loser!ellie who took weeks of convincing from dina and jesse to finally download hinge after she wouldn’t shut up about how she’s “never beating the loser lesbian allegations”. truly she could have any girl she wants but just doesn’t know how to speak to them in real life. they were so fed up with her bullshit.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who only has like 3 pictures of her actual face so the rest of the photos on her hinge profile are just art pics and gay memes

| ❀ | loser!ellie who had to beg dina for help writing all the little prompts just to reject all her ideas because she’d “never say something like that!”

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who started getting so cocky as soon as those likes began to roll in. saying some shit like “ooo i have rizz” in the cringiest way possible. jesse just says it’s cause there’s a masc lesbian shortage and of course she flips him off in response.

| ❀ | loser!ellie whose cockiness immediately leaves her body when she realizes she has to go through the likes and accept/reject every girl. eventually she just gave up and stopped looking because it felt “too mean” and like “too much work”.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who SUCKS at responding to messages and likes after she lost all interest about 2 days into having the app. that is until she stumbled upon your profile…

✄ - - - - ♡ - - - -

| ❀ | loser!ellie whose glued to her notifications after she matched with you on hinge. at this point you’re her fixation, and every other message besides yours are going unanswered. as soon as she works up the courage to ask for your number, and you oblige, she immediately deletes the app.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who stares at her screen for like 5 minutes straight at the first text message she plans to send you, even though it was literally just “hey, is this y/n?”. she even googled the difference in connotations between hi, hey, and hello. it’s safe to say the girl is straight up mental about you.

| ❀ | loser!ellie who gets more and more unhinged as y’all get better acquainted with each other through texts. eventually she's spamming you with updates about her day, instagram memes that she thinks are funny, and an occasional flirty message—but of course, she’s waiting for that first date to really test the romantic waters. like yes she’s obsessed with you, but to the extent where she’s so scared to screw things up so every little move she makes is with caution and regard to your feelings and boundaries. it’s honestly super sweet.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who eventually asked you on a first date after you sent like 3 different flirty memes to get the point across that you like her a lot and wanna be taken out for real. you definitely were sending her some shit like this…

| ❀ | loser!ellie who planned out a whole agenda for y’alls first date so it would be absolutely perfect. she refused to tell you where she was taking you or what you guys would be doing because she thought it would be better as a surprise. and although you were kinda stressing about what to wear and what to expect, the element of mystery was kind of endearing.

✄ - - - - ♡ - - - -

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who pulls up to your house in her little beat up sedan that she had cleaned for like the first time ever just before she came and picked you up. there was still clearly some reminisce of her mess as seen on the stained seats and crumbs on the floor, but you didn’t mind—yours was just as bad (probably worse).

| ❀ | loser!ellie who took you out for sushi as the first stop on your date, to which she graciously paid for even with you fighting to put your card down on the table first. she looked so adorable with her little california roll, and even cuter when she accidentally got too much wasabi in a bite and was fiending for water while simultaneously trying to play it cool in front of you. you just laughed which immediately made her feel better about the whole thing.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who then took you to your town’s expansive park to walk the dirt trails and just talk. neither of you had ever gotten along with someone so well, the conversation was absolutely effortless. you talked about all your interests, funny life stories, your fears, and so much more. ellie listened attentively with nods and affirmations throughout which made you feel so cared for, something most girls on dating apps could never do. you extended the courtesy back and ellie told you all about her own stuff, including her obsession with space, to which she pulled out her favorite book on the topic to show you. space had never really piqued your interest before, but when it was coming out of the freckled girl's mouth, it seemed like the coolest thing in the world.

| ❀ | loser!ellie who sat next to you on one of the park’s wooden benches. time had flown by and neither of you had realized until your head was resting on her shoulder as the sun set in front of you. the orange cast hit her auburn hair just right and it looked like she was practically glowing. you couldn’t help but stare at her beauty which she noticed and with a concerned look questioned if she had anything on her face. you informed ellie of the trance she had put you in and she blushed the color of your pink nails just before leaning in to give you the most tender, loving kiss you’d ever received.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who couldn’t stop kissing you once she started. your lips remained locked with hers for a solid 5 minutes, lips puffy and saliva exchanging, until the sound of a dog barking a few feet away broke the exchange. the energy had shifted in the best way possible and the both of you quickly opened up about how much you liked one another. one thing lead to another and suddenly ellie has out her pocket knife and is carving an E + R (reader) into the wood of the park bench. how lesbian of you guys ♡

| ❀ | loser!ellie who didn’t want the date to end and you were right there with her, so you somehow found yourselves in an empty parking lot at 9:00pm, drinking slurpees while she tried to teach you how to skate. it started off as a real attempt with her teaching you the basics like where to put your feet and the importance of bending your knees. after about 4 different falls onto the dirty asphalt you gave up on your genuine pursuits. discouraged, you sat right down on the board, knees up, before ellie gave you a push and you rolled across the lot. she was laughing her ass off and you were too until you hit a bump and tumbled off.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who bolted into the CVS the parking lot belonged to and bought a bunch of unnecessary first aid items for the small cut on your knee. she came back out of the sliding doors and you died of laughter as she pulled out a box of peppa pig bandaids for your skating “injury”. ellie insisted you needed to be taken care of though, so you let her do her thing and she finished it off with a small peck to the cap of your knee and one on your forehead.

| ❀ | loser!ellie who spent the trip back to your place with one hand on the wheel and the other on your thigh, driving you absolutely wild. you almost had to remind yourself that this was just the first date.

| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who had been parked in your driveway for 10 minutes already but continued to stall your departure with more of her shenanigans. soon she ran out of things to say though and leaned over to kiss you goodbye. this goodbye turned into more and you ended up in her lap before the night was over. it wasn’t until your back hit the steering wheel making the car honk that you finally exited the vehicle.

| ❀ | loser!ellie who waited for you to completely make it inside before she drove home, giving you a final little wave as you opened the front door. after she was back at her place she instantly texted you about date 2 and thanked you for the best night of her life. in her eyes, you were a keeper!

✄ - - - - masterlist - - - - ♡

taglist...

@endureher @gold-dustwomxn @alexpritch @4rt3m1ss @robinismywifee @sophlovesbooks @97cityy

(taglist is for all callmelola111 works, if you'd like to be removed just kindly lmk)

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butterscotchpiesandguys · 4 months

Text

Student Becomes the Teacher

It was a familiar experience to me, getting in my car, going to class early, doing homework. Felt nice. Of course what was also familiar was the bullying. You see I had recently gotten fired and had a wake up call. I needed to do something better with my life. So what did I do? i, as someone so smart would do, joined a technical institute. I went into a more financial side though. This did not make me popular with my classmates who had been there longer, were usually older, and most of which were more hands on.

They would call me a nerd, a loser, and a geek. Of course I didn't care all too much about this. Harassment was just that, and quite frankly it was some annoying dumb ass adults who couldn't even think straight enough to get a job that was actually needed. This attitude also made me very unpopular. So unpopular a teacher complained. Why? Cause he had heard some of the stuff me and my field would say about the welders.

It was just stuff like how they're stupid, all have at least one DUI, won't amount to anything. Stuff like that. He went so far to complain to the head administrator of the school. Now he used to be an electrician so he knew how it was to be hands on. He loved hearing about all of this and hatched a plan. The workload for the welders had been pretty overwhelming for just one instructor...

It was only a few days before I heard murmurs of a new instructor coming on campus, of course it was some welder... not like my section could get anything. But that same week I was called into an office at campus. I expected nothing much, maybe an odd thing I lost, although what it was I could not imagine... what I didn't expect was the head administrator.

"Hello [Y/N], we just wanted to talk to you today." Oh god what was it about, he could see how nervous I was. It was humiliating but also I needed to try and keep cool. "We had received some complaints about your attitude towards the welders and electricians, I just wanted to go through a few questions with you, that ok?"

Without knowing what to do I nodded, "Y-yes sir." I gulped a bit.

"Good, so first... is it true you had said to Taylor that he was a... no good stoner with no future? Is that true?" I tried to shake my head no but it went the opposite way. "Ah, glad you were honest with me. Well... you know here we like to give second chances to anyone right?" I shook my head in agreement. "In that case, any felonies you have?"

What felonies? What kind of- "Yeah, actually I've had a dui or two, got arrested for a fight or two... or more." What was I saying?! What the hell?!

"I appreciate your honesty... Tom was it?" What kind of name was that? It wasn't my name at all? Wait why did I nod?! "Yeah, well that's gonna be tough but your students generally would relate. The head administrator smiled at me. "We can wave those away since your track record for your work is pretty good."

"Glad to hear that." I said again in that weird voice. What the hell was happening... why did I suddenly remember welding and shit... What the hell...

"Yeah... I think you'll fit right in, Tom." Why was he being so devilish right now?!

"Thanks man, really need this." I chuckled as I stood up and walked out of the room. "Startin next thursday right?"

"Yup! Just wear somethin like that when you come in! We'll get a shirt in your size soon!" He laughed as I walked out, the window in the door showing a new reflection.

My face was more dashing, a bit older as well. My hair was messy but in an almost purposeful way. My body had grown quite a bit of muscle now... hair as well. Tattoos had been put on my body frivolously! I looked like some typical douche bag!

I walked through the halls, trying to see on my phone what had happened. My background was a picture of a motorcycle. Jessie... what? Who the hell was Jessie? My contacts had some girls in there and some guys I had no clue who they were. Going through the messages they were my drinking buddies and some hookups.

I continued until the electrician teacher stopped to talk. "Hey are you..." I wanted to say my actual name but that didn't pop out.

"Yeah, name's Thomas Wylder. You can just call me Tom though." I smiled at her... it was like my body moved on it's own. "New teacher here, welding." Wait...

We started to talk in the hall for a bit, just about staff in the school and how the welders were. She described them as younger than me and rowdy. I would make douchey comments or state shit about my life. Where I now lived, how many years I had been a welder and in the union. It was like I wasn't even me anymore. Eventually I cut it short, needing to go do some "tasks" at my home.

I went outside to find it... the same motorcycle from the picture. Jessie. I put on a leather jacket and no helmet... I could ride it with no issue though. I was still wondering how or why this happened. It was as if I was... no... the head administrator wouldn't do that would he?

I eventually got back to wherever my home was. Beaten up shithole kinda... not in a good neighborhood either. I waved to a neighbor and went in. Smelt like shit, I reached in my pocket and took out a cig and started smoking... no... I was the worst kind of person. The kind I hated. Dumb, arrogant, douchey, and toxic! It was awful!

2 MONTHS HAD GONE BY

I was now regularly teaching the class, about two weeks into this hellish experience I had started to regain full control of my life. While I tried to actually stop these worse traits, I couldn't. By that point they were ingrained into me. Now I acted like a douchey teacher, the kinds you hate. The ones that will just tease or make fun of nerdy kids. Of course I was well loved by the staff and my students.

I worked as a welder and taught the trade now. I hated it... but it gave me money to pay the lifestyle I never wanted. I don't think I deserved this but... I'm slowly coming around to it. I feel more confident and hey, I even hang out with some of the douchebags I had teach me when I went here... god I sound so old now... I hope someday I can reverse this before it's way too late.

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lbxbx · 4 months

Text

Cockpit 6 | knj

Pair: Namjoon x reader

Summary: Namjoon goes through a rough time while getting a divorce, meeting you at the club two weeks in a row when attraction becomes unreal.

Rating: +18 mature content, Smut, divorce, fatherhood

Previous | Next

a/n: let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!

taglist: @wecanpretendit |

You open up your eyes the next day, you didn’t get enough sleep but your phone just buzzed a notification, you click your tongue when you recall that you fell asleep before putting your phone on silent or do not disturb, you woke up with a mild hangover from last night’s poker game. You rub your eyes and immediately dig between your pillows to locate your phone.

You scrunch your eyes at the brightness when you unlock your phone, two notifications caught your attention, one being an email from the medical association, announcing that there’s a conference happening in Ilsan on Monday and you have to prepare a lecture for it. You’ve always attended those kinds of meetings but just as listener, but this year it’s your first time as a speaker since you managed to be one of the best in your department, the first notification made your day already, you’re proud of yourself.

But this email was sent a couple hours ago.

The second notification showing that someone texted you something two minutes ago and they unsent it, you click on the app and scroll through it, you even try googling how you can see who’s the sender, but you got zero results.

You scroll down and spot your chat with Namjoon, you click on it to see his last seen being a minute ago, but this doesn’t prove anything, it could be just a coincidence.

Although it isn’t.

Namjoon is dragging his carryon with him on his way to the terminal, he throws away his third empty cup of coffee before grabbing his phone, he’s been thinking about you the entire night, he wants to talk.

“how are you?”

“can we talk?”

It doesn’t even take a split second for him to unsend those messages, he can’t do it over text or over the phone, and he has to fly in less than an hour so he can’t really do anything until he lands in Seoul. He needs to see you face to face.

He swipes the app away and locks his phone when he arrives to the terminal.

“Shouldn’t the hospital pay for your ticket?” Jungkook asks out of breath, both of you are running on the treadmill, you’ve been working out together for some time now.

You and Jungkook met in the states in your first year in university, you both had majored in medicine, but he couldn’t keep up with the pressure, he went through so much that he just had to switch majors, he took the first plane back to Seoul and finished getting his degree to become a teaching assistant in Seoul’s university. You lost connection with him for a long time and you ran into him years after in a club and you became closer than ever.

“Yeah, they do, but I think I should take my car so I can move freely around there.” You shrug, he looks at you before squinting his eyes. “Honey it’s just one day, just go do your speech and fly back. Plus, the hospital is paying so you don’t have to spend anything.”

“It’s not about the money honey.” You mock his words, “It’s just that I don’t mind driving.”

“Don’t, really. Flying there is much safer.” He finally stops running when he finishes his miles. “You can’t drive there and back here on your own anyway, it’s not safe.”

You roll your eyes before turning off the treadmill, you grab your bottle of water and drink some to quench your thirst. “Whatever dumbass, you have to help me with my lecture.”

Both of you decided to shower at the gym and head out to Hoseok’s, they helped you choose a subject for your lecture and you finished it in a couple hours, it was a piece of cake with their help.

“Is it true what I heard?” Hoseok shuts his laptop and grabs a slice of pizza, you and Jungkook both turn to him in confusion. “What?” You ask.

“I heard some stuff from Seokjin hyung.” Hoseok takes a bite and wipes his mouth clean, you try and act oblivious but Jungkook is getting curious. “What?” He looks at you then back at Hoseok.

“Y/n hooked up with the guy she kissed at the club.” Hoseok shrugs. “It’s okay to talk about it since it’s over now, right?”

The younger looks at you with a shameless smirk on his face. “Nice.” He nods his head. You squint your eyes and elbow his chest. “Shut up.”

“So you totally agreed to hook up with a stranger but not with me.” He genuinely seems offended.

“Get over it Kook,” Hoseok huffs. “The guy is married.”

You study Hoseok’s face, is he pretending that he doesn’t know about the divorce? Or did he not really read his papers?

“You slept with a married man?” Jungkook exclaims a bit too loud that you rub your ear. “Okay first off, the neighbors don’t have to know, you don’t need to be loud.” He pouts.

You rub your forehead, you recall that night clearly when you tried to guess what’s his job, you literally had his hands in yours, there wasn’t a ring on it. “And in my defense, he didn’t tell me he’s married.”

“You should’ve asked.” Hoseok points and Jungkook agrees which makes your jaw drop. “Why would a married man flirt with a stranger? He’s the one who started talking to me.”

“Men don’t get enough-” Hoseok shrugs and gets interrupted by Jungkook. “No no, men never get enough.”

You knew all along that some men are pigs but now you somehow find this very unbelievable, and you’re positive that your friends might be pigs too, they’re men too after all.

“He has a child.” Your voice barely comes out, you’re in denial.

“So?” Jungkook asks as if having a wife and a son isn’t enough of a reason, you look at Hoseok, he’s just eating carelessly and totally not shaken by Jungkook’s question and the cringe on your face.

You close your eyes and shake your thoughts out of your head. “Okay, we need to stop talking about this, it was just a one time hook up and it won’t happen again, I don’t even know the guy.”

Monday came in a blink of an eye, surprisingly you weren’t that nervous, you got into a formal attire and filled your handbag with everything you could ever need, your flight is scheduled at 9 in the morning, you’ll be landing in Ilsan an hour later, and your flight back is scheduled to land in Seoul around 7 in the evening.

You grab your phone to find your friends active on the group chat wishing you good luck, you hover your fingers over the screen and respond to them with a smile on your face.

You take a cab to the airport and check in and head to your gate, you’re on your iPad re reading your lecture again while listening to music, you take a sip from your coffee and you spot a bunch of cabin crew and you scoff.

You didn’t realize how wrong Namjoon did you until now, everything seems to remind you of how bad things turned, and no matter how hard you convinced yourself that he’s just a stranger and you won’t have to see him again, you still grit on your teeth. You’ve always been smart and wit, your gut feeling was always right and you question yourself, why did you decide to ignore it this time, you have no idea.

Maybe something deep inside you actually had a thing for Namjoon, not a crush or something, but he just ticks everything on your list, and you find him quite close to your ideal type of men, but oh well, the man is married.

Well, he’s getting a divorce too. You think and you widen your eyes at your own thoughts before you burry your face in your palms.

Even if he was already divorced or whatever, that wasn’t your problem now. The man lied, and he’s a total red flag for you now, you didn’t have full trust in him to begin with, and now you can’t trust him at all.

Do men really not get enough? You recall what your friends said days ago, they can’t be totally right, you’ve seen healthy relationships before where each partner finds the other more than enough and they’re totally happy with each other.

You lift your face back up and you see the cabin crew again, you could clearly see what seemed to be the pilot flirting with one of the flight attendants, and goodness there’s a ring on his finger. Men.

Namjoon could’ve totally slept with so many women and convinced them that he’s single just like he did to you.

Speaking of which.

Namjoon is in the airport bathroom soaking himself with perfume before he heads to the terminal, he’s a few minutes behind the rest of the cabin crew.

The past few days were extremely hard on him, he’s been flying nonstop all over the republic just to distract himself from over thinking and just to waste time. He was going to try and contact you but he still isn’t brave enough to do so. He even drove to your place and stayed in his car for hours, hoping that you’d head out of the building any minute, but you were staying home the past few days.

He knew if he called or texted you wouldn’t answer, and he’s right.

The moment he walks to the terminal and boards the plane is when your face is in your palms because you’ve been having a debate with yourself earlier.

You didn’t see him, and neither did he.

“Where have you been?” His co pilot speaks as he enters the cockpit, Namjoon puts his carryon in the overhead bin before putting his phone down on his seat. “I was having a smoke.”

Boarding finally starts and you walk through the boarding bridge while carefully slipping your iPad in your bag making sure it won’t touch your heels, you chose to wear a pair of sneakers on your way there and change into your heels when you finally get there.

A queue is forming near the airplane door and you hear the flight attendants giggling with the passengers, you step a foot into the plane and one of the cabin crew welcomes you with the fakest wide smile ever. “Welcome aboard, may I see your boarding pass?”

“Thanks.” You hand her the ticket not bothering to mirror her smile, “I’ll take it from here.” A deep voice resonates that makes you lift your face up to see him.

Fucking Kim Namjoon.

Out of all the flights your hospital could’ve booked, they chose the one that Namjoon was flying.

Your eyes meet and it feels like you’ve seen him not long ago, you feel yourself getting charged with hate and anger again when you see him and you hardly control yourself to not snap at him and make a scene.

He snatches the ticket from the flight attendant and looks closely at it. “Come, I’ll walk you to your seat.” An immediate frown sits between your brows, you know he’s not authorized to walk you to your seat, and you can hear the other cabin crew whispering between each other.

You don’t have to take a long walk to your seat since the hospital booked you a business class ticket even when it’s just a one hour flight. Namjoon leads the way and you walk after him, he stops near your seat and points his head towards it. “Here you go.”

He didn’t leave you a good amount of space to enter your seat, so you stand super close to him before putting your bag down and take a your seat. “You didn’t have to do that.”

He bends down on his knees and leans his arm against the seat in front of you. ”How long are you staying in Ilsan?” And you immediately answer while trying to look careless, unlocking your phone and scrolling through it. “None of your business.”

“Y/N, please, we need to talk.” He begs with his voice barely whispering. “I’ll be waiting for you when we land-“

“Save it Namjoon, I’m going there for business and I don’t have the time.” You look at him, a sigh escapes his nose and he swallows when he looks at your lips for seconds, before looking back into your eyes. “I won’t waste your time, I’ll drive you wherever you wanna go. But please.” He begs again, his hand nearly falling on your leg but he stops himself and rests it on the back of your seat.

You scoff and shake your head, you look through the window for a second, then look back at him. “Look at you.” His eyes are locked onto yours. You continue. “Just so you know, there’s nothing you could say to explain yourself.”

“Namjoon, they need you in the cockpit.” A flight attendant nudges his shoulder, he nods without even looking up at her, then leans in closer. “Don’t get off the plane when we land, just stay here and we’ll leave together.”

You sigh in response and his hand finally lands on your knee for a quick touch of affirmation, he gets up and makes his way to the front of the plane, you eye him from head to toe, your eyes piercing through his big body, and he knows you’re watching.

You fasten your seat belt and lean your head back on the chair, you were hoping that you’d catch some sleep on the plane but you can’t.

You can easily predict what he wants to talk about, and you really used to fancy this man in general, but now he looks like a total different human being to you, and you can’t say you’re not disappointed.

You’re not going to over think this anymore, you’ve had enough, you’re gritting on your teeth again and your jaw tenses, you feel yourself about to get a headache. You’re seeking for closure.

The announcement bell rings and your eyes widen when you hear Namjoon’s voice radiate through the speaker. “Good morning and welcome aboard, this is your captain Kim Namjoon speaking.” You find yourself breathing heavily suddenly, you look all the way to the front of the plane, you can see the cockpit door still open, and you could see just the side of Namjoon’s body and the rest is blocked by the stupid giggling flight attendant.

“First I’d like to welcome you on Korean airlines flight number KA87 heading to Ilsan, we are currently third in line for takeoff. We are expected to be in the air in approximately 14 minutes, we’ll be up to a cruising altitude of 32 thousand feet, flight time will be one hour, if the seat belt sign is turned please remain seated with your seatbelts fastened.” You can see him shifting in his seat, before your phone buzzes a text, you grab your phone and see that he was the one who sent the text.

“I’m happy to see you :)”

Your stomach does this weird thing inside you that you haven’t felt before, your hand hovers over it and you try had to calm your breath but now your heart is fluttering.

“Please switch off your mobile phones, or turn on airplane mode for safety reasons.” He speaks through the speaker and you put your phone back into your bag with your jaw down. You cannot believe him.

“In about ten minutes after departure the cabin crew will be coming around to offer you a light snack and a beverage, until then, sit back, relax and enjoy your flight, thank you.” He closes the speaker and the back of your hand sits on your burning cheek, you’re totally confused on what’s happening to you.

You unbutton the first two buttons of your shirt and fan your face, if any of the flight attendants saw you they’d think you’re afraid of heights or you’re panicking but really, you’re not. You’re just.. Overwhelmed, if that’s the right word to use.

“Cabin crew please be seated for takeoff.” He speaks one last time before he moves the entire plane towards the runway.

Namjoon did his hardest to stay focused on the only thing he had to do, his mind was rushing with thoughts, each one interrupting the other, he has no idea how to start talking, hell he’s not even sure if you’re going to wait for him or not. He couldn’t fight the smile that’s slowly creeping on his face, it doesn’t go unnoticed by the copilot, he even smirks before asking Namjoon. “Is that your wife?”

The question robs the smile away from Namjoon’s face, and he finds himself cringing. “No.”

She could never live up to you, no offense to her. But she doesn’t put any effort in the way she looks, she never cared, in fact Namjoon doesn’t recall the last time he saw her styling her hair or putting on makeup. She’s unemployed since she’s taking care of Jay most of the time, but Namjoon opened a bank account for her so she can do whatever she wants or even buy something for herself. But she never did.

And you, gosh he doesn’t even know where to start. You’re just you.

The second you stepped foot on the plane and he saw you, he felt his stomach twist and his heart skipped a beat, he could feel a hint of tightness in his boxers as his body starts pumping blood everywhere. He really is happy to see you.

Meanwhile you’re in your seat less than an hour later as the flight attendants take their seats to prepare for landing, and you may seem biased when you admit that this was the smoothest landing ever. Namjoon must be really good.

People almost immediately rise from their seats to claim their luggage from the overhead bin, you grab your phone and turn off airplane mode, you’re welcomed to Ilsan with a few text messages from your mobile network, the moment you clear this notification you lift your face up to see the passengers beginning to exit the aircraft, and you spot Namjoon standing with the flight attendants and saying goodbye to the passengers one by one with a soft smile with his stupid dimple showing.

His eyes pierce to you between each passenger and he’s glad you actually stayed, he grabs his carryon from the bin above his head and puts it down on the floor before nodding to you.

You take it as a sign to get up and you do, throwing your bag over your shoulders and lowering your sunglasses down to cover your eyes, you walk towards him and you feel your body heat up the second he puts his hand on your lower back. “How was your flight?”

You look at him and roll your eyes at how cocky he’s getting and he lets out a soft laugh. “I’m just messing with you.” This motherfucker.

“What brings you to Ilsan?” He starts talking as you’re walking down the stairs of the plane, and you take a second to give him a blurry answer. “I’m here for work.”

“Work?” He asks as both of you make it inside the bus that’s driving you to the airport gate.

You look around the bus and it’s packed with people and there isn’t a single seat empty, you lean your back against the window near the door and you try finding a hand grip to hold onto, Namjoon leans both his palms behind you and nods. “Hold onto me, it’s okay.”

The smell of his cologne mixed with cigarettes wafts through your nose, you’re sandwiched between him and the window, and you’re surrounded by so many people that it’s physically impossible to push him. You look into his eyes to see him staring at your lips, your eyes wander lower to his neck to see his necklace.

It’s the necklace you saw on his neck the morning he left your place.

Your fingertips move towards his neck before you fish out the necklace from underneath the buttoned shirt. The look on your face makes his heart shatter, and even his heart melts when you breathed. “That’s your son.”

He looks down to your fingers and he touches the small necklace too, making both your fingertips touch, you feel his touch in a form of electric current and you lower your hand immediately. “That’s my son.” He whispers.

You study his face for a long second.

Despite the fact that he cheated and what he did was wrong on so many levels, he looks like he totally regrets it, and he seems like he genuinely wants to make things right with you. You’re ready to hear him out.

“Alright.” You sigh and he smiles softly, tugging softly on the loose strand of your hair behind your ear.

The bus starts moving and you immediately hold onto his wrist for support, his smile goes wider before he grabs your hand into his, intertwining his fingers between yours which settles this weird feeling down in the pit of your stomach. What in hell is going on?

“It’s okay, I’ve got you.” He takes a step closer to you, the smell of his cologne getting stronger and chest barely brushing against yours. You remind yourself that this man lied to you once and you can’t just let him off the hook this easy.

It’s a five minute ride to the airport and it felt like five hours to you, you’re getting worried at how your body is reacting around this man.

You finally get to the airport and finish all your paperwork, he fishes out a pair of car keys and leads you to the parking lot.

“You’re renting?” You question him while buckling up and he shakes his head. “It’s my sister’s car.”

“Ah yes, you’re from Ilsan.” You remember that he told you this before and he nods, you lean down to take off your sneakers and socks off, you switch to the pair of heels you have in your bag, you can feel his eyes on you so you turn to look at him. “What?”

“Where are we going?” He asks, you show him the exact location that the conference was held in and he nods and starts driving, he doesn’t even bother opening maps or anything, he knows every alley in Ilsan. “How long are you staying here?”

“Namjoon, you’re the one who’s supposed to be talking.” You sounded too mean and he starts feeling pressured, his breath becoming slowly irregular. “Fine, fine.”

You look at him while he’s driving, he’s forming small sweat pebbles on his forehead and his grip around the steering wheel gets tighter. “I’m sorry.”

You’re fed up with how hesitant and scared he seems. “Yeah, I know, and?”

“I uhm.. I should have.. told you since day one.” He clears his throat. “What I did was really wrong and unfair to you.”

Your hand sits on your chest when you exclaim. “To me? You’re married, you should feel sorry for your wife.”

A frown sits on his face and he feels his blood pressure elevating by the second, he gets really irritated at the mention of her. “No, y/n, you don’t know anything.” You frown. “Enlighten me.”

He rubs his face and his jaw tenses, he opens his mouth to start talking, but he shakes his head instead and looks through the window. “For fucks sake Namjoon.” Your voice starts getting louder, he slams the steering wheel and finally bursts. “I’m miserable, okay?” He’s louder than you are.

“I’m fucking miserable, I’m not happy, and I’m lonely.” His chest heaves up, he runs his fingers through his hair before continuing. “My life is a fucking nightmare, y/n.”

You feel your heart clenching when his voice starts getting shaky. “It’s killing me.”

This man lied to you once and you don’t feel like you can trust him again, for all you know, he could be lying to you again. You’re unsure if the reasons he listed earlier are valid enough for him to cheat on his wife.

“I feel like shit for doing you wrong.” He stops the car on the side of the road and looks at you. “You have the right to be mad at me, I know I’m a terrible person.”

And right off the top of your head you ask him. “Is she not good to you?” Your voice comes out in a form of a whisper. He scoffs and shakes his head before looking down. “I’ve known her for years, but she still feels like a stranger..:”

You lose it when you see tears forming in his eyes. “We painted this fake image of us holding hands in front of people and smiling just so they think that we’re happy, but we’re not even an inch close to happy. I tried so hard to compromise but I got nothing in return, it was always me who has to work hard for this marriage and I got nothing. I thought that life just goes on and maybe that’s what all married couple are like, but no. I’ve made so many wrong decisions in my life but she was the worst ever.” His tears finally roll down on his cheek and he just sobs, gravity does its job and his tears fall onto his lap.

You’ve never seen a man this weak and vulnerable, you feel your heart squeezing at his state, he looked so firm and happy on the outside, he looked stable, but he was able to conceal it all very well, that must’ve drained him through those years.

You unbuckle your seatbelt and sit on your knees, you grab his head into your hands and brush his tears with your thumb softly before hugging him closer to you, he wraps his arms around you and speaks. “Imagine being silenced for years.” He pulls back, leaning his forehead against yours. “I’ve been through this nightmare for three fucking years and I couldn’t say a word to anyone about how fucking miserable I am.”

“Shh. It’s okay.” You whisper, cupping his jaw in your hands and tracing it with your thumb, you brush your nose against his and close your eyes. “I’m here.”

He grips onto your top with his fist and pulls back, “What?”

You feel the need to help him escape this, the man is clearly going through severe depression and he’s emotionally deprived from any act of affection or love. It’s not like you’re offering to love him, but you need to help him get back on his feet.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you.” You smile softly at him and offer him your hand, he locks his eyes into yours and grabs your hand pulling it closer to his face, he leans his head onto it and kisses it softly.

“Thank you.” He whispers while mirroring your smile. You giggle and adjust your seat. “We have to get back on the road Namjoon.”

He nods and turns the car back on before hitting the road again, you felt the need to explain to him the reason you’re in Ilsan and he ends up offering to attend the conference with you, actually no, he insisted on attending.

He parks in front of the building and both of you exit the car, he opens his carry on and manages to change just his top before entering the main hall.

“Miss y/l/n.” The head of the medical association approaches you while reaching his hand out to you, you shake his hand firmly and smile. “Lovely to see you Mr. Baek.”

“I’m so glad you got to be a speaker this year.” He smiles back, his eyes spotting Namjoon behind you, you pull back and put your hand behind Namjoon’s back, pushing him closer to you. “Let me introduce you, this is my friend Namjoon.”

“Nice to meet you.” Namjoon shakes his hand firmly before the old man speaks to you. “It’s lovely for you to have support, we’re all so proud of you.”

“Thank you.” You smile before hooking your arm around Namjoon’s. “Pardon us.”

Even when you just introduced Namjoon as your friend, he’s not used to being touched like that in public because he was never touched like that in the first place.

Speaking in front of a huge crowd was never a big deal for you, your lecture was interesting to begin with and your powerful personality made a strong presence on stage, you almost forgot that Namjoon was between the crowd watching you with his jaw slightly open.

The second you stepped on that stage he felt… Euphoric.

He listens to every single word that comes out of your lips attentively even when you’re using complicated medical terms, he scans your body language and your hand movements and he swears he hasn’t been this impressed by a woman before.

He’s proud of you.

You’re the woman he’s always imagined having in his dreams, he was quite the ambitious person himself and he had so many goals he wanted to achieve but his personal life always stood in the way.

He finds himself charged when he’s around you and not only sexually, he’s suddenly in a better mood and his brain and body function better, he finds himself way less anxious than when he’s around his family, although he should feel this way around his son too, but your aura is totally different.

His heart skips a beat again when your eyes meet in the middle of your lecture and you smile softly at him as if he’s the one who needs support. He finds your smile contagious and he gives you one back with a soft nod, he’s really proud of you.

You finally end your lecture and they applaud you, you know you did great. You bow your head and get off the stage to be welcomed by a few colleagues who shake your hand and make small talk with you about how good your lecture and where your sources were from, they even ask you a couple questions about your topic.

You got offered two jobs on the spot in two different hospitals around the republic but you were kind enough to refuse, the hospital you currently worked at is the hospital that helped you get where you currently are.

You thank them and make your way back to your chair, Namjoon gets up on his feet and grabs your hand into his. “You were great.”

“I know, thank you.” You grin when he pulls you closer for a soft kiss on your cheek, he pulls your chair back for you to sit next to him, and both of you sit back to listen for the rest of the conference.

It’s a couple hours later, Namjoon is driving you back to the airport while you’re on your phone texting your friends on your group chat, they had planned a dinner to celebrate you tonight, so Taehyung was supposed to pick you up from the airport since he already lives close to it.

“Can’t you please stay for tonight?” He manages to turn his head towards you for a split second while he’s driving, you lock your phone and put it down before you speak. “I’m supposed to meet my friends for dinner and I’m on call tomorrow morning.”

His shoulders sulk in disappointment and a sigh escapes his nose, his eyes are now focused on the road and it’s clearly showing that he wants to be around you more, which kicks your ego up to the top.

At the same time he doesn’t argue and he doesn’t insist, he just wants to give you your own space so he won’t pressure you, you chuckle before running your fingers to the back of his head, scratching his scalp with your nails. “You know I can see you back in Seoul.”

You know your hand drives him crazy and you could care less If you crash, you want to leave him edged and thirsty for more and you like it. His eyelids starts to feel heavy and he fights it so hard to stay focused on the road. “It’s just that..” He breathes, your fingers move down to scratch his neck, he swallows before he proceeds. “.. I wanted us to be alone and away together.”

You take a long breath before you retrieve your hand back onto your lap, you’re not going to give him what he wanted immediately. You did offer your help but you didn’t forget about the terrible lie he played on you. So he deserves to be denied for the mean time. “If that’s your way of inviting me to bed than save it.” You smirk. He lets out a quiet laugh and stretches his hand to sit on your inner thigh, his fingers squeezing your covered flesh softly and stroking it, “Fine, I deserve to be punished after all.” He bites on his lip.

“Good boy. I’m glad you’re aware of that.” You managed to play the role of the tough cookie but you can’t deny that his touch is doing wonders to you, the warmth of his hand against your covered skin and his soft strokes gives you flashbacks of that night you spent together, and the other nights where you made him cum just by hearing your voice.

You finally get to the airport and he turns off the car in the parking lot, he looks at you while unbuckling his belt. “Are you sure you don’t have the time?”

“The gate is already open Namjoon.” You look at the time on your wrist, you unbuckle your seat belt and fish out your documents from the bag. “Thank you for keeping me company.”

“I’ll see you back in Seoul?” He coaxed, you giggle and take your time to answer with a slow nod. “I’ll see you back in Seoul.”

He leans in and you think he’s going to kiss you on the cheek, but he moves further down to brush the tip of his nose against the pulse of your neck, he takes a long inhale through his nose, collecting whatever he can of your smell which arouses him, he closes his eyes and whispers. “I can’t say it enough, but I’m truly sorry.”

You clear your throat before you move your hand up to his jaw and caress it with your thumb. “I know you are.”

He keeps his face buried in your neck for a couple seconds before he pulls back and locks his eyes with yours, you see the face you saw earlier this morning, apologetic and full with regret.

“I have to go.” Your faces are extremely close that he feels your hot breath hit his glistening lips, he nods and fully pulls back to collect his phone and keys. “Come on, let me walk you inside.”

“I don’t know if we say this enough y/n, but we’re totally proud of you. We’re always there for you and we’ve got your back, we truly love you.” Taehyung lifts his glass of champagne up on the air before all you clink your glasses together. “To y/n.”

You sip some of your drink and put it down before Yoongi starts. “So how was your trip?”

“It was quite chill, it’s my first time on a business class, other than that everything went great, I also got a few job offers.” You slowly nod your head. Yoongi sips more of his drink and lifts up an eyebrow. “I heard some stuff from Jungkook.”

You snap your head towards the youngest who’s totally avoiding eye contact with you, his face flushing at the sudden mention of his name.

After all, what were you expecting? Seokjin told Hoseok, and Hoseok spoke in front of Jungkook, and now Yoongi is discussing this around the table where not only your friends are sitting, but also a couple of their partners.

And by the looks of it, his wife already know since she’s studying your face and waiting for confirmation.

Do they just go around talking to each other about you? Your hookup with Namjoon will haunt you for the rest of your life.

“Yeah it’s true.” You spit out, “Namjoon’s married?” Jimin asks and your eyes almost fall out from their sockets, as far as you remember, he knows you hooked up with someone, but not with Namjoon specifically.

“He’s married?” Taehyung dramatically drops his fork which makes you roll your eyes. “I actually saw him in Ilsan.”

Your statement was followed by a complete silence around the table, you feel everyone’s eyes on you as they’re waiting for you to elaborate, you clear your throat and open your mouth. “Relax, we didn’t go together, he was flying that plane.”

You realize that they still don’t know what he does when they look at you like you said something in a foreign language that they don’t understand. Hoseok turns his body fully towards you. “Flying the plane? Like fly fly?” He blinks repeatedly.

“He’s an aircraft pilot.” You take a sip from your champagne and you clearly see Mia and Jade, Taehyung’s girlfriend, swoon over the man, you nod with a smirk. “I know right?”

“And did you talk?” Seokjin hesitates, leaning his elbows on the table and closer towards you so he can hear you better. You nod. “Mhm. He apologized and I guess we’re okay now.”

“Please don’t tell me you’re going to see him again.” Taehyung whines. “You can’t be the mistress.”

Taehyung’s words woke some sense in you and you actually admit that you cannot be the mistress. You scold yourself because you shouldn’t have let him off the hook that easily and offer him closeness immediately.

You jump in your seat when your phone buzzes and speaking of the devil, it’s him.

“Call me when you’re home.”

“I miss hearing ur voice.”

A knot sits between your eyebrows and you actually leave him on read. You are not going to reply to him and that’s it. You lock your phone and put it back in your purse. “I’m not going to be the mistress.” You firmly say, and you cross your arms above your chest.

It’s later in the night, you had already finished your dinner with your friends that night and headed back home, you showered and put on a face mask, and went to bed really early since you’re on call in the morning.

A little past midnight, your phone vibrates repeatedly and you think it’s work because they usually call for consult during the night when you’re at home. But it’s Namjoon again.

“can I call you?”

“I’m at the hotel room”

“I’m flying back to seoul in the morning”

“I’m so glad I got to see you today”

Your fingers hover above the screen and you purse your lips, debating whether you should answer or not, but again Taehyung’s words echo in your head, which makes you quickly turn off the wifi when you see him typing, you lock your phone and put it on your nightstand.

Oh so you’re going to ghost him now?

You don’t hesitate for a second, you fall back asleep in a snap of a finger.

Meanwhile, Namjoon is freshly out of the shower, his hair dropping small pebbles of water on his neck and back, his phone is in his hand and he’s getting concerned of the fact that you’re not replying to his texts.

He actually saw it coming, and he knows you’re not going to reply to his texts or ghost him for some time, of course he’s not going to pressure you to answer, so he just puts his phone down and lies down flat on his bed. He knows he deserves the punishment.

He’s in Ilsan but he doesn’t always stay at his parents. Since he’s there partially for work, the aviation he works at provides him a room at the airport hotel, so he just stays there before he flies back to the capital.

To say you wake up cranky the next day is an understatement, your period started today and your tummy and back are killing you, and your headache is getting stronger by the second.

Hoseok who decided on picking you up to and from work today has been blabbering since you stepped foot in the car and you’re waiting for him to stop talking.

“Men actually love it when women are mean with them, don’t over think stuff with that man, I remember once I hooked up with a girl and I was planning on not calling her the next day, she wasn’t that special and she wasn’t really worth the shot, but I swear the minute she started being mean with me I liked her a lot better.” He even laughs and your face falls inside your palm, you could beg him to shut up.

“When she started being nice to me I got the ick and totally blocker her number, it’s just how the world works you know, and I’m not-“

“Hobi please.” You snap. “Shh.”

And the man sulks with a pout on his face, you’re not even sorry, you woke up on the wrong side of the bed today and your body isn’t giving you a break. You could’ve called for a day off but no one wanted to switch shifts with you.

The moment you step foot into the department, the nurses actually give you a few meds to help you go through your shift, it was hectic that day.

You grab your phone a few hours later and finally turn back on the wifi, Namjoon sent one text early in the morning, which is probably right before he headed to work.

“i hope ur okay, take care.”

Your fingers hover over the screen and you decide on messaging him back even when you don’t want to.

“fly safe J”

Your heart beats faster when he reads the message seconds later, you’re about to lock your phone but he’s calling you, and you can’t just ignore his call when you just texted him.

You wait a couple seconds later and finally answer him. “Kim Namjoon.”

He lets out a low grunt before laughing, you can’t see him, but he’s in bed stretching, he’s sleeping on his right side with his phone under his ear, his eyes immediately shut close when he hears his name. “Good morning.” His voice deep and sleepy, also low so he cannot be heard.

Fuck, he’s not helping you keeping your hands to yourself when he does that.

“Did you miss your flight or what?” You grab your white coat and make your way out of the emergency department to take your call. He breathes into his phone and speaks. “No, my flight was early in the morning, I’m in Seoul now.”

You can’t help but ask, even when you really know that it’s inappropriate and really none of your business, you even stutter. “Is she there?” And it comes out as a whisper. You’re really asking him about his wife.

It takes him a few seconds to process the question, uncertain whether he should actually answer the truth or not. Because she’s home and in the next room, if he was an octave louder he would be heard.

Although he did promise himself that he won’t lie to you, so he answers. “Yes.”

Your heart clenches and no matter how hard you think you’re going to accept it, it’s just really hard to digest.

You clear your throat and bite on your nails, and as if he can see you, he laughs quietly and whispers back. “I wanted to say this to you face to face, but you have to know, whether you showed up in my life or not, I would’ve gotten the divorce any way, so don’t worry.”

Namjoon never knew what it felt like to be taken care of or shown love, and neither did you, you’ve never been in an exclusive relationship with anyone before. Of course you’re loved by your family and friends, but someone actually offering you affection and care who is neither a family nor a friend feels weirdly good.

It’s like the missing piece in your life that you just realized you needed.

But still it feels concerning when Namjoon talks about you like that, and you actually spit it out to seek for an answer so you won’t have to overthink it. “Come on Joon, it was just a one time hookup, why are you talking like it’s more than that.” You even fake a laugh to make it sound nicer than you truly mean.

And he just blurts it out. “Because it is more than just a hook up,” And he can sense that your tension over the phone is increasing, you realize you’ve been holding your breath for a second before he speaks with an audible smirk on his lips. “Come on y/n, we both know it’s more than just a hook up.”

It slightly irritates you at how smug he sounds, you scoff before speaking. “Wow you surely sound confidant about that. I hate to break it to you, but really, it’s not true.”

“Okay.” He’s totally not convinced, you hear him muffling under the blanket in his bed. “I’ve been thinking about you the entire night.”

Now it’s your turn to make his life a little harder. “And did you make yourself cum?” He takes a long breath before he hums. “I made myself cum when I imagined the way I wanted to please you, y/n.”

You’re ashamed at the way your body reacts, even when you’re on your period, your body acts upon his words and your face flushes, you press your thighs together to ease the increasing heat between your legs.

What he just said suddenly filled a certain void inside you that you never knew existed, you’ve always wanted a man seek after your own pleasure.

Even when you absolutely enjoy the dirty talk, and even when it makes your cunt tingle, you still manage to ask him. “Hm, so I guess you called just to ease your morning wood?”

You doubt the fact that this man thinks before he talks, he sounds so convincing and genuine when he replies so fast. “Just so you know, I don’t just see you in that way.”

Of course you’re going to doubt that, but he’s is in fact serious, he does think you’re insanely attractive and really good in bed that it makes him sometimes wonder how you’re still single, but on the other hand, he finds your job and your lifestyle very interesting and attractive, it’s been a month since you guys first met at the club, he thinks he knows enough to really fancy you, but when he attended your lecture and saw how successful you are at what you do, it made him see a totally different version of you.

“Whatever Namjoon, I need to hang up.” You sit up from the bench, he doesn’t hesitate when he asks. “Do you have any plans for tonight?”

You actually have nothing planned for tonight, but you know you’re going to be kicked in the ass from your current shift and you’re also on your period. “Maybe.”

You can hear him stretching, he lets out a low grunt before he speaks again “I feel the need to take you somewhere, that’s if you don’t mind of course.”

You cross your arms over your chest. “Somwhere?”

“I know a wine tasting tour held today, it’s on the outskirts though and there’s a huge farm there and it’s the harvest season, so we can actually go and check out the entire process, If you want to of course.” He seems excited when he’s speaking, still making sure he isn’t heard by the other two living under his roof.

You’re intrigued, your mind wants to say yes so badly, but your body is barely holding on for work. “I can’t today, I’m not feeling well.”

He shifts in his bed before he sits up. “Oh no, are you okay?” His voice coming out so soft and sweet, you try to stifle a grin but you can’t, and he actually hears it through the phone when you speak. “Oh my back hurts, that’s all.”

“Do you want me to come over?”

Screw you Kim Taehyung for saying those words, they still echo in your head and for a split second you shrug it off, fuck it, your body is aching for Namjoon and you’re a little ashamed to admit it.

“Yeah, I mean-“ You bite hard on your poor lower lip before you realize that even if he showed up, there’s nothing to do when it’s your time of the month. “Sure, come over.”

Namjoon finally leaves his room after he finished his call with you, Jay was crying his lungs out and he was on the floor throwing a tantrum, and his wife is nowhere to be seen.

“Daddy.” Jay stretches his arms up when he sees his father which makes Namjoon’s heart melt, he kneels down and holds his son closer to his chest, rubbing the back of his head softly. “Daddy’s here, what’s the matter?” He kisses his forehead softly. “Why are you crying?”

“Mommy won’t give me my ice cream.” He cries even louder and his father barely understands a word. Finally she gets out of the kitchen and starts picking up the little toys from the floor, “Jay how many times did I tell you, crying will not get you the ice cream.”

And the little toddler’s crying is loud and he starts kicking his legs, Namjoon holds him closer and smothers his tiny faces with kisses. “Shh, it’s okay.”

He turns to shoot a glare at the demon picking up the toys, he actually feels nauseated when she’s around, and ever since he met you, he just can’t look at her, so he forces himself at the second. “Why won’t you give him his ice cream?”

Jay is Namjoon’s only point of weakness, he cannot stand seeing him want something or crave something without getting him whatever he wants, he’d give him the world if he asked and he’s willing to sacrifice anything for him, that all makes Jay adore his daddy.

“He didn’t finish his bowl of cereal and he even spilled it.” She throws the bag of toys down in the corner of the room, “No ice cream and no toys for the whole day.”

“He’s a baby, playing is all he’s got to do, you can’t just punish him like that.” Namjoon sternly speaks before standing up, still carrying his child.

“But daddy, I was too full and I said sorry.” Jay hugs his daddy tighter while wiping his own tears, “No you’re not going to get anything before you have your breakfast.” She approaches the little one and grabs him, Jay cries loud again and holds onto his father for dear life.

It aches Namjoon’s heart when he sees his child like that, he turns away and uses his palm to gently stop his wife from approaching them again. “Let me deal with this, he’s my child too.” He frowns before he goes to Jay’s bedroom and puts him down on his bed, he kneels down and cups his cheeks. “It’s okay baby, mommy wasn’t wrong, you can’t have your ice cream before breakfast,”

“But the bowl was too big, I’m full.” Jay rubs his eyes, his crying finally coming to an end, but the child is still sad. “Hmm, don’t you wanna be tall and big like daddy?” Namjoon pokes his son’s nose softly, “It’s okay you don’t have to finish your breakfast today, but I’ll tell you a secret,” He even whispers and inches closer to his son, a smile already starting to creep on Jay’s face when he’s enjoying the tiniest interaction with his father.

“We’ll go get you ice cream, but we cannot tell mommy, she’s not invited to our ice cream party.” And Jay looks at his father and it breaks Namjoon’s heart to see his son broken and crying over some stupid ice cream.

“Who were you talking to earlier?” She asks and gain’s his attention, she standing near the door frame with her arms crossed over her chest, he looks at her and wonders for a second when was the last time this woman showered?

He turns to his son’s closet and picks out a pair of sneakers. “Let’s get you dressed.”

“Who were you talking to?” Her voice gets louder and Namjoon doesn’t even flinch, he’s used to her being crazy and asking useless questions, he gets back on his knees and helps his son with his shoes. “Why do you care?” He asks, not looking back at her again.

“Just so you know, your son has been crying the entire morning asking for you, and he didn’t finish eat breakfast because you were too busy being on your phone.” She’s blabbering and even her son ignores her and asks his father. “Can I bring mister broccoli with me?”

Mister broccoli was a stuffed toy that Namjoon got as a gift for Jay when he took his first flight ever with his father, the little one is extremely attached to this toy specifically and he wouldn’t let any of his cousins touch it.

Namjoon nods eagrly. “Go get him.”

Jay runs back to the living room and Namjoon rolls his eyes before he looks at his wife one last time. “I would appreciate it if you try and not pick an argument in front of him.” He cannot stand this woman.

She scoffs, “At least try and be a good father, try and be there for your son. He cried all night.”

Namjoon hates being called a bad parent, he isn’t. He finds himself gritting on his teeth and his heartbeat pounds faster in his chest. “Oh trust me, I’m a better parent than you are.”

Jay’s presence back in the room that eases Namjoon down immediately, even though he guaranteed divorce, but still he has to contain himself in front of his son, last week’s incident was a tough lesson for him.

“Daddy can I put mister broccoli in the back seat with me? I also want him to wear the seat belt.” Jay’s playful tone makes Namjoon mouth twitch in a smile, he nods and prints small soft kisses all over his son’s face. “I’ll let you put the seat belt for him, deal?”

Namjoon’s been flying nonstop and he’s very tired and he needs to catch some sleep to make it up for the nights he stayed up at work, he’s very exhausted but he can never say no to his son.

He grabs Jay’s tiny hands and leaves the place, leaving the woman behind him fuming. They get down to the car and Namjoon even gives Jay the key to unlock the car, and the little one is staring at his father with heart eyes, he always tried his best to give him anything he wishes for.

Namjoon opens the back door and puts mister broccoli next to the car seat, he teaches his son how to buckle the seat belt and Jay ends up doing it on his own, Namjoon gets this cute aggression around his son that he grabs his face tightly and sucks his cheek into a kiss. He can do it forever.

He finally helps Jay get into his car seat and buckles him up, before they head to their ice cream date.

Your shift is finally over by the afternoon, you hand over everything to the team on the next shift and you call a cab home, you were near breaking down and balling your eyes out, nothing major really, you’re just hormonal and tired.

Hoseok was supposed to drive you back home but you instantly regret it when he calls you from the court and says that he needs an hour to be there because something was scheduled urgently today.

You get home and take your clothes off, instant relief when you ditch the fabric off of your skin on a hot summery day, you change into your pajamas and head to the kitchen to turn on the kettle for tea, you don’t usually get that big of an appetite when you’re on your period so food is the last thing you consider making, your doorbell rings and you head to check the cameras, it’s the man you told to come over, the man you’ve been waiting for.

You unlock the door and a warm breeze of air immediately wafts through the entrance carrying the smell of his musky perfume, “Hey, Come in.” You tilt your head inviting him to come on in inside, and the second he steps foot inside your house he inhales, the smell feels nostalgic to him even when he’s been here only once.

Your place has this distinctive smell, it smells clean and fresh, a hint of fruitiness to it, your diffuser is always on so it always smells good, and Namjoon has picked up the hint of the floral scent you spray your furniture with, and also picked up your smell. Your odor is engraved into his head and he can smell it even when it’s layers away or even miles away, he finds it arousing.

He enters the house and hands you a small grocery bag that’s been sitting in his hands. “Are you okay? You look tired.” He steps closer to you and tugs your hair behind your ear.

“I’m fine, what’s that?” You open the bag to check out what’s inside, your heart melts when you see that he actually put in the effort to buy you pain killers, a heating pad and chocolates, even when you already have every item in your household. “Thank you, you didn’t have to do that.” A genuine smile creeps on your face and he smiles back at you before pinching your cheek softly, you inch closer to him and give him a soft peck on his dimple that leaves him blushing, but hardly noticeable though.

“Come on, let’s get you into bed.” He takes off his shoes and you see him walking inside, again even when he’s been here once, he knows this place like the back of his hand, you know that he’s comfortable around you even when the two of you haven’t known each other for long, he feels familiar and he feels close.

You walk into your bedroom and he follows you, he takes a quick scan at your room and he can tell that you’ve been in bed and you’re planning to spend the rest of your day in bed even when he’s here, nothing sexual planned at all though.

“Do you want me to help you with the heating pad?” He’s standing so close behind you that you feel his breath his your neck, you swallow and exhale with a shiver running through your spine, you nod softly and fish out the heating pad from the bag, “On my back please.”

“Okay.” He softly speaks before going down on both of his knees, you grab your top and pull it up for him to have better access, and he opens the wrapper and takes the pad out, he prints the softest kiss on your lower back right by the end of your tatted spine before he sticks the pad onto it and pulls your top back down. “There you go.”

You could swear he kissed your pain away, or it’s probably the endorphin rushing through your entire body when you saw him at your doorstep.

“Make yourself at home, I need to make tea first.” You’re about to turn but his hands sit on your hips, putting a soft amount of pressure, he presses his lips against your shoulder for a little kiss and whispers. “It’s okay, get in bed, I’ll make you tea.” He even kisses the same spot again before heading to the kitchen.

What is he doing to you?

You get to take a quick glance of his back when he’s leaving the room and you feel your face heat up, your hand sits on your cheek and you try to ease your quickening breath, you never felt this way towards anyone and it feels different, your stomach is pinching you and you’re unsure if it’s the cramps or what?

You’re worried for a second, you don’t know if he’s doing this because he wants to, or because he’s trying to get you into bed again? You know he’s in a miserable marriage so he might just do everything because there’s a benefit for him.

You make your way to your bed and you hear his footsteps coming closer and your heart races again at his aura, he enters the room with a cup of tea in one hand, and the box of pain killers in the other one, he approaches your side of the bed and rests the cup onto the nightstand before handing you a pill from the box, you look at him in the face and you tilt your head, his eyes lift up and lock into yours.

For a long moment both of you are studying each other.

You were never able to find out people’s intentions right away, you are very smart and really wit, you sometimes make assumptions that turn out to be true just out of coincidence. But Kim Namjoon was too difficult to read, well at least to you.

Or maybe he is easy to read, but after you found out that he masked his misery and his years long marriage, it became difficult for you to really find out what were his intentions. You appreciate what he’s trying to do, but you don’t know why he’s doing it.

You actually consider introducing him to your friends just because they know how men think and what are their real intentions, Taehyung can easily judge people and he was never wrong.

As for him.

His eyes travel between yours, then move down to your nose and lips, up to the loose strand of your hair that’s tickling your jaw, he feels drawn to you in ways he cannot explain, and if he wants to reflect on the overall situation, he easily admits that he changed after he met you, you changed him, he’s a better version of himself when he’s around you, he’s looking at you and memorizing every single detail on your face, you’re not like her, you’re not like any of them women.

Actually it’s way easier than you think, Namjoon was too easy to read, if you just stop the over thinking for a second and see the way he stares at you, you could easily tell that the man is developing something for you, let’s just call it a crush for the mean time, you don’t know the effect you have on this man.

“Thank you.” You grab the pill into your mouth and chase it with water before pulling the blanket over your body, he stands up and takes his shirt off, after all, it was really warm that day.

And goodness you forgot how big this man is, you immediately look away because you know your body gets way too excited at the thought of Namjoon naked. And you also hate to admit it, but your sex drive is usually on fire on your first day of your period.

“You can sleep if you want to, I’m here if you needed anything.” He walks to the other side of the bed and lies down next to you.

You simply nod, maybe he was right when he told you this morning that this is more than just a hookup.

Minutes later, you close your eyes but you’re not asleep, he probably thinks you are, but you can’t, you open one eye and look at him, he’s lying on his back with one arm behind his head and his phone in the other hand, he’s reading something, clearly a book. His eyelids feel heavy and he puts down the phone on the night stand next to him before he adjusts in bed and falls asleep while hugging a pillow.

And suddenly you feel this flood of emotions wash through your entire body, and you feel bad for the man, a smart good looking sensitive man whose desperate to feel loved and touched after all these years, he’s practically a virgin even when he isn’t.

You huff and hide your face under the blanket, you cannot believe that you actually validate his reasons and give him the right to cheat, you even start thinking that him cheating should be worth it.

He’s a human being with feelings, and you feel like you can offer him some of his needs.

You crawl closer and pull the blanket over his body, you even grab the pillow away from him and hold onto his wrist to and put it around your waist, he’s not in deep sleep yet, so he opens his eyes for a second and processes the fact that you’re going to sleep in his arms, he tightens the grip around and pulls you even closer to him whilst whispering in your ear. “Do you want me to get you anything? Are you okay?”

“I’m okay.” You bury your face into his neck and both of you fall asleep in a click of a button.

It’s almost like both of you felt safe enough to go into deep sleep when you’re around each other.

You don’t know yet, or maybe you do but won’t admit, but you’re developing something for him too.

259 notes · View notes

geralts-yenn · 3 months

Text

Hollow Hearts

Walter Marshall x reader

summary: You break up with Walter but you just can't move on!

Basically a lot of heartache and longing

warnings: 18+, minors DNI! breakup, drinking alcohol, some hints of light smut

@henrycavillbingo prompt: fever

word count: 7k

Bonus chapter (that's the smuty part 😁)

My masterlist

It was hard. You knew from the start that there'd be times like these where Walter needed to retreat. Sometimes his job just took every bit of energy he had. And you had accepted that. You had waited till the storm was over, till he was able to give you something back again.

But now it had been months. You really tried to be patient with him. However at one point, the devil on your shoulder won. You started those little mind games. You stopped telling him that you love him, waiting for a reaction that never came. After that, you stopped the hugs, too. He still didn't even seem to notice.

This was the first time you realized that maybe you had lost him.

Seven days ago, you decided to take the final step. No touch, no word. It broke your heart. More than just a few times, you had to stop yourself from reaching out to him when you lay beside him. But then you pulled your hand back, and instead, you shed silent tears into your pillow.

In your head, you were screaming at him, begging him to show any kind of emotion. You wanted him to be mad at you. Anything but that feeling of being invisible. But Walter didn't. He came home late, sometimes he found his way into your bed, though most of the time he slept in his clothes on the couch. In the mornings, he would drink his coffee in silence and leave without a word.

Today was the day all of this would change. You hadn't slept all night. Crying, trying to find excuses not to leave. You still didn't want to, but as much as you loved Walter, you also needed to take care of yourself. And staying with him like this would destroy you.

He was standing in the kitchen, dark circles under his eyes, when you carried your suitcase and your backpack down the stairs.

“What are you doing, darling?”

A sarcastic chuckle interrupted your sobs. It took him only that much to realize that something was off? Finally, he was able to talk to you?

“I'm going to stay at my mom's for a few days. I will try to find an apartment as fast as I can. Bye, Walter.”

Your heart broke when you leaned forwards and your lips brushed over his cheek one last time. You held your breath, trying not to take in his scent. As fast as you could, you turned and ran out of the house before you could change your mind.

Walter shouted after you, but you couldn't dare to turn around and talk to him. You could have never left him if you had looked at his face for another second.

The next three days, you ignored Walter’s messages and calls. But then you finally were brave enough and you picked up the phone.

It was hard. For both of you. You didn’t think you had left any more tears to cry at that point, but you were wrong. At the end of your conversation, you were curled up on the floor, sobbing uncontrollably. But you had succeeded in resisting him.

Walter offered you to get back home. He would move out of the house himself, knowing you love it so much. He said he didn’t mind where he sleeps anyway. Although somehow you suspected that he just couldn’t stand being there with everything reminding him of you.

And he was right. Because now that you were back at the home the two of you had built together, it hurt like hell. Every single time you got up the stairs to the second floor, you heard that one creaking step that reminded you of him. Reminded you of those many nights where you finally could relax, hearing the sound that told you that your man was home safely. It would have been easy to avoid the creaking step by shifting your weight a little to the other side. But somehow you just couldn’t bring yourself to do it. You just couldn’t let go of him yet.

As the days got warmer, you sat in the garden and watched the blossoms of the peonies grow and open to the gorgeous, full buds of cream and powdery pink. With a sad smile on your face, you remembered how Walter had planted them for you, knowing how much you loved them.

Preparing your morning coffee, your eyes rested on the mug before you, the cracks still visible where Walter had glued the handle to it. You remembered the day it got broken.

Walter was in the kitchen making coffee when you got out of the shower. You had tried to sneak up on him, like you had so often, but like always, he had heard you, sensed you, whatever, before you could reach him. He turned, a broad smile spread over his face as he grabbed you at your hips and pulled you flush to his chest. “Good morning, babe!” he whispered before he started to nip on your earlobe. He knew it was your weak spot, and he loved to take advantage of it. You moaned in response to it and squirmed in his arms.

Within a second, somehow Walter had turned both of you, and you found yourself sitting on the kitchen counter. The towel that had been wrapped around your body was laying on the floor, serving as a cushion to Walter’s knees as he dove headfirst between your legs.

As your orgasm hit you, you knocked the coffee mug from the counter with your knee. You had both laughed at it and kept going. And after Walter had glued it together again, it became your favorite mug, always reminding you of that morning.

One of the joys of long relationships is having mutual friends. Which turns out to be quite complicated once you split up. This meant you had to see Walter from time to time at birthdays or other parties of your friends. It was always awkward, and it always hurt to see him because you still loved him so fucking much, and he looked worse every time you saw him. You knew he didn’t sleep. He didn’t eat well. You wished you could talk to him and somehow make him feel better. But how were you supposed to do that without hurting yourself? So you just asked your friends to look after him. They promised you that they tried, but they knew Walter just as well as you. That stubborn man didn’t take any help from others, at least not if it weren’t you.

After another evening that was supposed to be fun with friends, you came home sad and worried. You slumped down on your couch and sighed. Your look fell on the shelf on the opposite wall, where all the picture frames were lined up. Pictures of family members, of yourself, and also the pictures of Walter and you together. The ones you had planned to remove so often but never actually did.

“Dammit, I need to move on!” you told yourself as you got up again. You went to fetch one of the cardboard boxes that you had in the guest room ever since Walter had moved out, containing all the things that hurt too much to see them but not enough to make you throw them away. You picked up the photograph that you had taken on your first vacation together. He looked so happy and relaxed as he smiled into the camera. You wondered when was the last time you had seen him like this. Or anyone. One after another all the pictures of Walter found their way into the box and when you had removed the last one, your composure was gone too and you dropped to the floor, crying.

You were standing at the window as the fall storm was blowing yellow and orange leaves of the maple tree in your garden into the air. Another memory hit you as you watched the leaves fall onto the grass again.

Walter standing in the garden, a knit beanie hiding most of his curls, big heaps of leaves on both sides of him. He had taken off his sweater after gathering the first pile of leaves, a while later he opened the buttons of the flannel he was wearing, the t-shirt beneath showing a sweat stain on his chest. He leaned on the handle of his rake, smiling, when he realized you were standing at the window and watching him.

Another strong gust of wind rushed through the air, and most of the leaves that Walter had gathered blew into the air again. You laughed and saw how Walter did the same before he threw the rake into the remaining heap. Both of you were still laughing as you held the door open for him. “Let’s spend the time with something more useful”, he grunted and kissed you hard, his cold hands slipping into the waistband of your jeans and groping your ass.

“But you stink!” you protested mockingly. Walter shook his head and heaved you up. You wrapped your legs around his waist as if it were a reflex. “Then you’ll have to take a shower with me”, he laughed, already on his way up the stairs with you clinging onto him.

What hit you the most was whenever those bittersweet memories came to you unexpectedly. When you thought you were happy and having a good day until suddenly Walter was back in your mind and your heart broke once more.

Like that time when you were having a great evening with your best friend. You were sitting on your couch with her, drinking wine and talking about the books you were reading at the moment.

“Hey, do you still have that book you read last year?” your friend asked you, “The one where the girl gets snowed-in in a cabin with those two hot bearded guys? I need to borrow it from you. It's the perfect season for it now.” She pointed out to the snowflakes slowly starting to cover the trees and lawn. You laughed as you remembered the book she mentioned. Yes, that one is definitely worth reading. You got up to look through your shelves for it and soon after, you held it in your hand. Your friend cheered as you showed her the illustration on the cover. “That's the one!”

But then, as you opened the book, a note fell down to the floor.

Walter used to hide those little messages everywhere for you to find. You loved them so much. But when you saw those words now, the loss felt suffocating. You froze, not even able to breathe as the pain filled your heart and spread through your body like a cold, dark shadow.

Your friend knew right away what had happened and guided you to sit.

“Do you want to talk about him or do we need more wine?” She asked.

“Both!” you answered with a weak smile.

Two empty glasses later, you weren’t really smarter, but at least some of the weight that crushed your heart was lifted from your chest. You had talked about how much you missed Walter, and it felt good to finally admit it. But as you recounted the problems you had the last weeks before the split up, realization hit you. Way too late, but now you saw it.

“I was so occupied with pitying myself that I didn’t see how much all of this was my fault, just as much. Playing these stupid games instead of talking to him like an adult. What if I had told him how I feel? Maybe we could have made it? Maybe he would be here with me then.”

Your friend held you all through the ugly crying that followed. When the tears started to cease, she brushed some strands of hair from your face and held a Kleenex out for you to take.

“Talk to him. Tell him what you told me today.” But you shook your head.

“It’s too late. I’ve been ignoring him for months. He’s moved on. Probably dating someone else by now.”

You were on your way to a barbecue at a friend’s house, but every crossing you passed, you argued with yourself if you should turn. You had an exceptionally bad week. After losing a big project at your job and arguing with your parents, Friday had ended with a terrible date. Not even wanting to go, your friends had told you it was about time. And the profile of that guy was promising. But then he turned out to be already taken. He was completely in love — with himself.

You wanted to spend the rest of your weekend in your bed with a book and ice-cream, but you had promised that you’d show up for at least a few hours, so you kept driving to your friend's house.

Parking your car next to the big black truck you know too well, you cursed. You should have stayed at home.

The first thirty minutes, you were lucky, you didn’t run into the man that you dreaded to see. You greeted your friends, talked for a bit, but somehow people seemed to sense that you were not in the mood. So they let you lean against a tree and sip on your beer in silence, soon.

And then you saw him, clad in jeans that showed off his great ass and a gray Henley that fitted his wide frame perfectly. And as you managed to tear your eyes from his body, you also saw that he didn’t look that tired and exhausted anymore. He was smiling, the creases in the corner of his eyes only making him look more attractive.

“That fucker!” you snarled, hating him for making you want him so desperately. Looks like he's over you now, you thought, a sadness pooling in your stomach that made you want to run and hide. You decided that you were done with the day, and you were going to just ruin it completely now. You made your way over to the improvised bar, your eyes focused on the vodka bottle.

The stars above you were so beautiful. But they were spinning, way too fast. You wanted to complain about it, but your mouth didn’t work the way you wanted to, and you suspected the words that came out of it didn’t really make sense. Somehow deep inside, you knew you should get up and call a taxi, but how were you supposed to do that? So you just kept laying in the grass and watching the world turn.

Dark curls were suddenly in your way. And then you saw a pair of blue eyes, squinted, the brows above them furrowed.

“Come on, sit up!” the familiar deep voice told you, and two hands held you in a tight grip until you were upright again. You sank your back against a firm wall that was warm and heaving in a steady rhythm.

“Walter!” you slurred, “always my savior!” His sarcastic chuckle was full of frustration, but you wouldn’t have noticed. Tonight, you wouldn’t notice anything anymore.

It wasn’t as easy as he thought to maneuver you into his truck, your limbs slipping out of his hands, but finally, he had you on the passenger seat. He rolled down the window in hopes that the fresh air would help sober you up. And halfway to your home, he had the impression that you were getting a little to your senses.

Worried, his eyes shot to you whenever he could dare to move them away from the streets. You were beautiful, even in this state, he thought. Your eyes big and glossy, as you watched him silently.

Getting you into your bed was easier. At least the physical part of it. Walter opened the door and took in the scent of the house that he had missed almost as much as its inhabitant. He carried you up the stairs and carefully laid you down on the mattress. His fingers fumbled with the little straps of your sandals. Then his look fell on your clothes. Should he leave you like this, or help you undress? It wasn’t as if he didn’t know you without clothes. But he wasn’t allowed to see you like this anymore. And maybe it was better if he didn’t get reminded of how beautiful you are. How soft your skin felt. So he tucked you in the blanket without removing the dress you wore. But he just couldn’t leave without leaning down to brush his hand over your hair.

He jerked when your hand shot up to him. Your fingers wrapped around his neck as you pulled him close. “I still love you, you know? So much! And I would just love to be fucked senseless by you. Now. Please!” Your lips pressed hard against his, desperate to taste him. But Walter didn’t reciprocate. He froze for a second before he pulled himself free from your grip.

“Don’t!” he told you, his voice a whisper, but full of hurt. “Don’t do that.”

First thing you noticed as you woke up was the awful taste in your mouth. Then the stabbing pain that was shooting through your head when you opened your eyes to the sunlight. You squeezed them shut again and sighed.

“Idiot” you scolded yourself. "What have you done?"

When you opened up your eyes again, slowly and carefully this time, you noticed a bottle of water and some painkillers on your nightstand. Were you smart enough to prepare for today's hangover, at least? But how exactly did you even get home? You had absolutely no idea.

After you took the painkillers and downed half of the bottle, you got up to get into the shower. That was until a scent filled your nostrils and you changed your plans.

Down in the kitchen, there was a whole pot of coffee waiting for you, and a plate with two bagels. Fried eggs and cream cheese. The ones that Walter always used to make for you. You also noticed the bouquet of peonies standing on the table with a note beside it.

Fuck! So he took you home? And he made you breakfast? The bagels were still warm, so he couldn’t have left too long ago.

Distressed, you tried to remember what had happened tonight. But only fragments appeared in your head. The barbeque, Walter laughing, the vodka, so much vodka, damn! Then stars and cold grass, Walter in his truck, the stairs creaking. Nothing else.

Wait! Was there a kiss? Somehow you remembered a kiss, but that couldn’t have been. This must have been a dream. You looked down on yourself. You were still wearing your dress. And your panties. Thank god. But damn, you needed to fill the gaps in your memories.

Ashamed and frustrated, you decided to take a shower and then take the embarrassing task of calling Walter.

You sat on your bed, ankles crossed. Your stomach was doing somersaults, and you weren’t sure if it was for yesterday’s disaster or because of what you had to do next. You stared at your phone, not willing to take it into your hands just yet. Biting on your lip, you finally scrolled to Walter’s number and dialed.

“Hey! Thought you’d call today. How are you?” You tried so hard not to cry as you heard him, talking softly as if he tried to be careful with your hammering headache.

“I’m okay, considering the state I was in yesterday, I guess.” you said shyly. You were ashamed and felt incredibly uneasy. “I… I…” you stuttered, “I need you to help me with a few details. I can’t really remember most of the evening. And I need to know if I said something stupid. Or if I did something stupid, if we did…” You couldn’t end the sentence, but Walter should be getting it.

“You didn’t do anything wrong. You were just a little tipsy. Or, yeah, well, quite drunk.” He let out a small laugh, but it wasn’t offensive. It was soft and warm. “You were cute, and didn’t say anything stupid. I put you into bed and made sure you had everything you needed. I slept on the couch for a while, I wanted to see that you were really doing okay. At six this morning, I left. I thought I’d give you some privacy."

After you had ended the call, thanking Walter, you cried. You cried because you were so grateful that Walter had taken care of you. That he was there for you when you needed him. But part of you also cried because you had hoped to hear that you had kissed, that you had somehow found a way to show him how much you still felt for him. But you hadn’t. And you knew if you couldn’t do this with liquid courage, you’d never manage to tell him.

If you had thought you were heartbroken before that day, you had no idea how much you were able to suffer. You were so incredibly mad at yourself that you had walked away from the man who meant the world to you. And today you finally realized you would never get him back. You were absolutely miserable.

But at the same time, Walter wasn’t doing a lot better. He hadn’t slept at all that night. He had tossed around on your couch, pondering over the sentences he heard you say, over and over again. You had told him you still love him. But could he trust your drunken words? And even if so, was he able to give you what you need? He had failed you before. And he was so fucking scared that he'd hurt you again. Hurting you was no option.

But damn, did it hit him hard that night. The urge to protect you was so strong. And while holding you in his arms, he wasn’t sure he could do the right thing, to keep away from you. He couldn’t take advantage of your state, but it was so hard not to hold you, not to kiss you back, to feel you one last time.

Now he sat in his office, staring at the folders in front of him, but he couldn’t focus on anything else but you. He took out his phone, started typing, deleting the words again, only to type and delete them once more. “Fuck!” he growled as he threw his phone on the desk. All he wanted was to hold you in his arms and tell you that he still loved you. But he couldn’t, not until he was sure that he’d be able to be there for you, no matter what.

It’s been a month since the vodka fiasco, and you were finally at least trying to move on. But after a few days that hadn’t felt like you were a total failure, today was harsh.

You felt off, couldn’t focus, and your body switched from shivering to sweating minutely. After she had watched you worriedly the whole morning, your favorite co-worker came to you around noon. She put her hand on your shoulder. “Hey, you’re sick. Go home and take care of yourself.”

First, you wanted to protest, but before the words reached your mouth you realized that she was right. So you took her advice and went home. You made a cup of tea and curled up on the sofa with a soft blanket. Your eyes drifted shut before you could even turn the first page of your book.

With a startled cry, you woke up. Beads of sweat were covering your forehead and running down your chest. Sighing, you lifted your head and realized you must have been sleeping for hours. The room was dark, only a dim glow from the street lanterns falling through the windows. Taking a deep breath, you tried to clear your head, but the dream that had woken you didn’t leave your mind.

It had been the night when Walter had taken you home. You remembered how his fingers had carefully moved over your ankles, how this touch had made you feel so desperate. He had put you in bed, wrapped you up like a burrito. And even if it was dark in the room, you were able to take in the soft expression on his face, his eyes staring right into your soul. You remembered how the touch of his hand through your hair had broken your last will to resist him, how you had pulled him down to you, telling him all those things that you never wanted to admit to him. And you also remembered how he didn’t kiss you back, how he pulled away from you, sounding so hurt when he told you to stop.

Tears were falling from your eyes. Was this real? A flashback or a dream? You weren’t sure. The next memory was even more foggy. But just as blurred as it was, it was the part that you wished the most to be true:

You had almost drifted off to sleep when you felt Walter’s hand on your cheek, his fingertips caressing your neck, like he had done a thousand times before. His voice barely a whisper, you had heard him say: “I still love you, too. And I miss you, every damn day.”

His curls had brushed over your forehead before you felt his soft lips grazing your cheek for a kiss so gentle you hardly felt it at all. But it was there. He had kissed you, he had admitted his love to you. If it wasn’t just your feverish mind playing tricks on you.

With the little energy you had in you, you forced yourself to go up to your bedroom, change into your pajamas and fall into your bed. After an hour of going back and forth through the dream you had, in the half awake state you were in, you texted a message to Walter, telling him that you need to talk. Just as you hit the send button, you regretted it immediately. You wanted to delete the message, but then you saw the checkmarks, implying Walter had already seen your text.

And then — nothing. You waited for an answer to appear, but after several minutes, the fever took over again, and you slowly drifted off to sleep.

The vague sound of a doorbell rang through your head in your dream, then knocking. First hesitant, then louder, more determined. Your eyes fluttered for a moment, but you were too tired to keep them open. You heard your name, the familiar deep voice calling it as if it were a question. You tried another time to open your eyes, and this time you were successful.

The creaking step announced him like so many times before, and you were able to sit up on your elbows when finally there was a knock on your door.

“Hey, it’s Walter. Are you in there? Are you okay? I’m madly worried.” Still not fully processing everything around you, you only managed a quiet answer.

“You can come in,” you told him, wondering what got him worried.

The door opened slowly and Walter’s curly head appeared in the door frame.

“Goodness, there you are.” Walter said breathlessly. “I’ve been calling you for hours.”

He stepped into the room and, without taking his eyes from you, he let himself fall onto the chair next to your dresser.

Staring at him confusedly, you sat up. Ignoring your thundering headache, your look went to the window, seeing it was still dark, then to the phone on your pillow. It must have slipped from your hands when you fell asleep.

The screen showed new messages and missed phone calls, all from Walter.

Your eyes going back to him, you chewed on your lip.

“Damn, sorry Walt. I fell asleep, I think I caught the flu.” Immediately Walter was on his feet again, crossing the distance between you with long strides. Softly, he pressed his palm on your forehead.

“Oh, dammit, your skin is burning hot.” He brushed some sweaty strands of hair from your face before the comfort of his hand left your skin again, and he took a step backwards. “I’ll be back in a minute.” Within the blink of an eye, he had left your bedroom, and you were just as confused as before. Your foggy brain couldn’t tell what was going on.

You felt a cold hand on your cheek and opened your eyes, wondering when you had even shut them at all. Walter was standing beside you again, his brows drawn together in concern as he looked at you.

“Hey, welcome back.” Not losing his worried expression, his mouth curled into a small smile. He pointed to your nightstand. “I brought water and tea, didn’t know if you wanted something warm or cold. But you need to drink. And take those pills. I’m making you some soup now, okay?” His fingers brushed gently over your face. As you sat up, Walter took some pillows and placed them behind your back so you could sit back more comfortably. You reached for the bottle of water and took a sip. You hadn’t realized that you were thirsty, but the water running down your throat felt like heaven. Walter held the tablets out for you to take, and with a grimace, you swallowed them, drowning them down with more water.

“Thank you!” you whispered, not knowing what else to say to him. You knew you needed to ask him about that night, but right now, you were not strong enough for it. So you accepted to just take his help instead.

He brought you soup and watched you sternly while you were eating. After that, he handed you more water. “Feeling better?” he asked, and you nodded.

“Yes, I think the medicine is doing its work now. Thank you, Walter. Really!”

He had taken his seat on the chair again and smiled softly at you. “Any time, sweetheart!”

You must have fallen asleep again soon after that. The next time you opened your eyes, you saw Walter crouched on the small chair, his head sunken to his chest, silently snoring. You were curled up, too, your body shaking and your teeth chattering.

“Walter!” you called him. It was barely more than a whisper, but his eyes shot open immediately, and he rose from his chair, one of his knees cracking audibly. He was beside you in an instant and took in your shivering.

“Your fever is rising again,” he remarked. He took a blanket that was hanging over the foot of the bed and wrapped it around you, together with your comforter. After checking his watch, he shook his head with a sigh. “It’s too early to give you more paracetamol.”

“I’ll live!” you responded. “But you can’t sleep on the chair, your back will kill you tomorrow. At least take the couch.”

Walter frowned at you, and you noticed the muscles in his jaw flexing.

“Don’t clench your teeth,” you told him softly. You had seen him doing this a thousand times before. He was tense.

“I can’t leave you alone,” he said and you knew he wouldn’t give in. He was a stubborn mule after all. You huffed and moved a little to the side, making space for him.

“Come here. This bed is big enough, and we’re adults after all.”

When he didn’t move, you rolled your eyes, regretting it immediately as your headache got worse. “Get in here, Walter!” You said, more rigidly this time.

Walter exhaled and finally gave in. You felt the mattress dip behind you. A second later, an arm wrapped around your shoulder. It was over the blankets, but it still felt so comfy and familiar.

“Is this okay?” he whispered, and you nodded, despite you answering him:

“You’re going to catch my flu.”

Walter chuckled and only pulled you a little closer. “Nah, I never get sick.”

When you opened your eyes the next time, everything was different. Warm sunlight fell through the window. Your head wasn’t throbbing in pain anymore. You were neither shivering nor sweating. Maybe you were still a little weak, but you felt so much better than yesterday. It was a good start into the day. On the downside, the man beside you was gone, too.

After a stop in the bathroom, including a sixty-second shower that made you feel a hundred times fresher and fitter, you stepped into some leggings and a shirt and made your way down into your kitchen. The scents wavering through the hallway and the clattering of tableware told you where you would find Walter.

Seeing him moving so comfortably through your kitchen, you felt your heart constricting in pain. It once was a natural sight, but now it was like a reminder of what you had lost. When he would see that you’re better again, he’d leave and the room would feel so empty without him.

You watched him placing everything he had prepared onto a tray and turn. His eyes fell on you and he huffed in surprise.

“Hey, you’re up!” You noticed how his eyes traveled all over you, checking the state you were in. As always, all protective and caring. “Are you feeling better? I was just about to bring you breakfast and more medicine.”

You stepped into the kitchen and sat down at the breakfast bar.

“I’m so much better.”

As Walter dropped the tray in his hands on the counter before you, you put your hand on his arm.

“Thank you for taking care of me, Walter.” A sad chuckle escaped you. “I feel like I have to say that a lot, lately.”

“I’m glad I can do that. I’ve let you down often enough before.” He turned his head to his side to avoid looking at you.

Your hand brushed through his beard and guided his face back so you could lock eyes with him.

“You didn’t let me down, Walter. At least not on purpose. We were both making some stupid mistakes back then. Sit down. We should finally talk.”

Shutting his eyes, he nodded. But instead of sitting down on the chair next to you, he moved to the coffee machine, holding up the steaming pot. “I think I will need some caffeine for that, you want some, too?”

You told him yes and another thank you, then you watched him grabbing two cups from the cupboard. When he put them down on the counter, both of you let out a small wince. Walter looked at the green mug with the glued handle with an expression that you couldn’t quite name. When he looked up at you again, you tried your best to feign unawareness, but you guessed you did a poor job with it.

Anyway, Walter ignored it, poured coffee into the two mugs and took the broken one for himself. He finally sat down next to you and started to speak.

“Sorry that I let myself in yesterday. But after you didn’t answer the phone, I was really worried, so I took the key from the key safe in the shed.”

“That’s okay, Walter. I’m glad you came. It was good having you here.”

Walter nodded and took a sip from his coffee.

“What was it that you wanted to talk about?” he asked you. You didn’t really want to answer, but you knew you had to. Not knowing if your memories were betraying you would make you go mad.

“When I was feverish, I had a dream about the night you brought me home from the barbecue.” You felt the heat rising up your neck and cheeks. You still felt so awfully embarrassed about what happened then. “I’m not sure if it’s a memory or if my mind is just playing tricks on me. I remembered pulling you down into a kiss and telling you,” you took a breath before going on. “I told you I still love you, and…” You couldn’t finish the sentence. Instead, you carefully studied Walter’s face. His eyes changed, showing both kindness and pain.

“You remember correctly.” His voice was hoarse. Your heart was racing in your chest.

“But you said, ‘Don’t do that.’ You pulled away.” You felt how your eyes were watering, your gaze getting blurry.

“I did.” Walter’s warm hand wrapped around yours and his thumb drew tiny circles over your skin. “It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I didn’t want you to stop kissing me. I wanted to feel you in my arms. But you were drunk. I couldn’t have taken advantage of you like this.” His other hand cupped your cheek as his eyes were looking into yours deeply. “When you were sleeping, I couldn’t hold back kissing you one last time. It was just a peck on your cheek, but I needed to feel your skin on my lips one last time.”

So your memory hadn’t betrayed you. It was true. Your hand moved to Walter’s neck, your fingers raking through his curls. “I’m not drunk today.”

You watched as Walter pressed his lips into a thin line. “You’re sick with fever, darling.”

But you shook your head. “No. I’m better. And even if so. Believe me when I tell you this, Walter. Ever since I walked out that door and left you this stupid letter, I have regretted it. I love you, I miss you so much, and I wish I would have talked to you back then, instead of playing stupid mind games. It wasn’t fair to leave you without ever letting you know how I felt. I’m sorry!”

The look Walter gave you was more intense as ever. He stepped between your legs, wrapping you into a tight embrace. Your heart jumped as your face settled on his chest and he pressed a soft kiss on your hair.

“I am sorry that I was emotionally absent for such a long time. I have left you before you did. Maybe not physically, but that doesn’t matter. I wasn’t there for you, I didn’t see your pain.” He paused for a brief moment, though his hands never stopped running up and down your back. “The last few months I asked myself so often if I was worthy of your love, if I was capable of treating you right. If you’d take me back, that is. And I wasn’t sure. This job is exhausting. Sometimes you can’t help but numb all feelings to be able to go on. But I’m willing to try if you still want me. You just have to promise to talk to me.”

You pulled away from Walter’s chest so you’d be able to look into his eyes. As you saw the love in them, you got up, your hands cradled his head, and you pulled him down to you.

When your lips found his, new tears ran down your cheeks, but you ignored them. This kiss was telling more than any of you would have been able to express with words. Every little bit of longing went into it, and you felt it running through your bones. Your chest filled with love until you were about to burst from happiness and relief.

Only when you both ran out of oxygen, the two of you parted. Walter pressed his forehead against yours, and you felt his breath grazing over your neck. He smiled softly at you and brushed his nose against yours.

“Are we doing this?” he asked. His voice was showing a vulnerability that you had never seen with Walter. “Are you taking me back?”

“Yeah, I do, if you want me back, too.”

Bonus chapter

#walter marshall #walter marshall fanfiction #walter marshall fanfic #walter marshall x reader #henry cavill characters #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill fanfiction

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honestlyhiswife · 7 months

Note

Hi hi hi umm so this is a request I suppose, haven’t been able to stop thinking of Ghost learning that his girlfriends boss left a raunchy message on her phone & he just goes crazyyyy, forces reader to stay home, takes her phone, punishes her etc, possibly harassing or hurting the boss, idk it’s your page so write whateverrr and I’ll eat it up 😚 IGNORE if this makes you uncomfortable please! -🪬

OH GOD Protective!Ghost is in full defensive mode. I don't think he'd be mad at civilian!reader, I think! and thank you for the request 🪬!!

CW / mention if violence? i think!

The moment he saw that text "Know you got a boyfriend, let's be real sweet cheeks. You want me." He actually fucking lost it.

He knew it wasn't your doing, he instantly knew you didn't instigate it, you two were in a secure relationship that took years of building, one crummy, pathetic man wouldn't change it.

The next day at your job, you show up, nothing out of the normal. At this point, Simon and you have talked about it. Initially he was upset, cause who the fuck does this manager think he is? But he’s taught you how to handle situations like this, not that he didn’t think you couldn’t do it on your own, it was more for his peace of mind.

However the next day, he decided to pick you up instead. But, it wasn’t Simon anymore. It was Ghost, the lieutenant, the man in the S.A.S for god’s sake. When you walked out, he felt lighter almost immediately. Your smile stretched from cheek to cheek, knowing that he was probably the reason for your happiness made him feel more confident with what he was about to do.

He grabbed your bag and opened the door like the chivalrous man he is. Once you were sat inside, shotgun seat of course for his passenger princess, he asked you one thing. “Where’s the bloke at love?”

Smiling at him, you eagerly replied “At the back! Having a smoke, have fun love!” You were well aware of what he was going to do. It’s not like you were going to stop him, if anything, you would encourage it. It was hot, what were you meant to do? Stop him from being protective? As if.

He locked the door, leaving you alone as you scrolled through Pinterest after connecting your phone to the bluetooth system in the car. You wished you could see what he would do to creepy guys like that but each time you’ve tried to ask, you’re met with a glare that sends a shiver down your spine, mimicing the pattern of a spider crawling down your back. What Ghost was about to do was actually similar to what a spider would do.

Injecting venom then paralysing.

He’d start off not by actually injecting venom, but rather he’d tie up the bloke. Spiders inject venom with intent to immobilise their prey, Ghost just wanted the man to suffer. If his poor darling has to be uncomfortable, he’ll make sure whoever made her feel that way, would suffer. Once Ghost found him, he’d bind him to the closest pole using the knot skills he’d learnt in all those years of serving. Savouring the moment, the knots became tighter, almost cutting off blood circulation in the man’s body.

Then comes the paralysing. As if being tied up to the pole wasn’t enough, he dabbled in some “light intimidation”. To you, you’ll never know that means but he’s always brushed it off by saying that he was just “sending a warning”.

Although, you don’t know what kind of warning leaves Ghost will little red splatters decorating his forearms or bruised knuckles but, a warning is a warning. Once it was over, you kissed each of his knuckles while you were cradled on his lap. Listing down each way he made you feel safe for each knuckle, he truly understood what it was to love someone.

—

a/n: heyyy…… 😀 sorry if it’s bad i just wrote this in between study periods as a way to get my mind off things!! but all feedback is appreciated!!

#honey has the mic #simon ghost riley #simon riley #ghost mw2 #simon riley x fem!reader #simon riley x you #simon riley x reader #simon ghost x reader #simon riley x y/n

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badnoahmens · 8 months

Text

I Took Your Keys, It Was Me - Part 2

Noah Sebastian x Reader

Words: 2.5kish

A/N: I’ve never had so many requests to make a part 2 to a fic before, so here’s this. Part 1 found here.

Two weeks had passed now, your normal daily life routine had fallen back into rhythm. A swell of work, sleep, food somewhere in the mix. There was a slight adjustment though, and that was the odd text message from Noah. It wasn’t every day, and no deep, dark secrets were being shared, it was simply a meme, a photo of something mundane, or most of the time, a terrible, terrible, pun.

The communication between the two of you was effortless, like talking to a lifelong friend. There was no sense of urgency, no burdening, no feelings of dread whatsoever, which was unusual for you to feel like that.

Their tour was starting to wind up. Only 1 week left, and 3 cities to visit and perform at. To think back at the meeting you had 2 weeks ago seems like more time had passed than it actually had. It could be because of life going back to normal, or because of all the stories Noah had told you about touring, both old and new.

Your mind got lost in a memory, one of a late night. You were sitting on the couch, dirty dishes on the table in front of you, scrolling through your phone absentmindedly as the TV kept playing in the background.

The sudden vibrations in your hand and a change of screen distracted you from your doom scrolling, seeing Noah’s name flash up. It wasn’t often that he would call, this was only the second time, but there was a comfort in talking to him that didn’t seem to happen with anyone else, especially this quickly after meeting someone.

“You’ll never believe what just happened” he would say, not even letting you say hello. Immediately, he continued. “So, tonight, after the show, we went to get some food because the hungry boys deserved a feast, and then…”

Your mind started to wander. He was so excited about what had happened that he called you. You. Out of anyone in the world. It was something that you tried not to think too deep about, but boy was that hard. He was excited, and thought of your name, and wanted to tell you all about his exciting story.

It was his laugh that brought you back to the conversation, bringing you out of your own head and back to whatever epic tale he was recounting. Something about getting lost and then being chased by some rodent and needing to hide up a tree, then the rodent climbed the tree too… it was hard to follow along with what he as actually saying because of the wheezing and laughter mid-sentence. You couldn’t help but just smile. A big, goofy, toothy grin. He sounded so genuinely happy.

“So, as you can probably guess, I have a new fear of rats now” he finished.

“So what you’re saying is, that big, bad Noah, who wears a ski mask and wraps his hands like a boxer to perform, is scared of a mouse?” You tease.

“Did you not hear me! This rat was the size of a small dog! What if it bit me!” He was off again. Going into strangely specific detail about how big it’s teeth were and how hairless it’s tail was.

Snapping back to reality, you couldn’t help but scroll through your old conversations, giggling once again at some of the photos he chose to share with you. One in particular was a favourite.

It was a selfie, and wore a uniform black outfit of a shirt and beanie. It looked like it was night, the windows showed a dark sky. Although it was a selfie, the photo was aimed over his shoulder, a chaotic scene of arms flailing and frustrated expressions in the band and crews faces. Noah himself looked as though he was stifling a giggle with his eyes semi-closed and lips pursed together. What looked to be a Monopoly board and its game pieces were scattered over the floor, table, and lounge. What you could only imagine is an argument occurred where someone was wrong done by, egos were crushed and friendships were put to the test.

It was these kinds of photos, the casual insights into his life, that made you think more about him than what you probably should.

Almost as though he knew you were thinking of him, a new message from Noah dings in your phone.

“We’re in your town next week!” Is all it said, followed by a second message. “Still offering that tour of the best places to eat?”

Your heart skips a beat. The memory of the offer to show him around your city floods back and you cringe a little at the awkwardness of it all. After musing over a response for a few minutes, you respond.

“I’ve got just the right place in mind”.

————————————————————————

The next week had finally rolled around and you were on your way to the food truck you had told Noah all about. It was… quaint. Set up permanently in an old car park, with some rickety plastic chairs scattered around, it served some of the best food you’ve ever eaten. Throughout the morning, you had changed outfits 4 times, drank 3 coffees, turned the house upside down looking for a hat that you didn’t even wear, and then almost locked yourself out of the house, all thanks to the panic that was starting to set in.

Thoughts if doubt started to creep in, force of habit you guess. Your mind was not the kindest of places, especially to yourself. Some of the things you would say to yourself almost made you pull the plug and not go at all, but you were distracted once again by Noah sending a message confirming the address.

Right now, you were sitting in your car, around the corner from where you were supposedly meeting everyone. You had invited the whole band and crew along to try and ease the awkwardness, but now it has made the whole thing even more daunting.

You leg bounced in its place, nervously tapping a rhythmic and repetitive beat, almost like you were building up the courage to actually get out of the car. A very long 5 minutes passed, and you forced yourself to push open the door. Why was this so nerve-wracking? Was it because it had been building up for a week, or because you were seeing Noah in person for the first time since you last met? Was it because you had brought along the hoodie that he gave you last time to give back to him, but secretly you didn’t want to part with it?

One foot started to move, followed by the other, as you walked closer to the desired location of greasy burgers and fries. Your stomach rumbled fiercely at you, reprimanding your choice to skip breakfast and run only on a caffeine diet this morning. It distracted you enough, right up until you could hear a familiar voice, echoed by a band of laughter.

You stood at the corner, looking at the food truck, seeing all familiar faces crowded around the plastic chairs and tables. Folio was talking to Jolly, making strange expressions and wide arm movements, as though he was telling an age-old story of his, meanwhile Jolly looked as though he had heard it all before. They were the closest, a wall of bodies with their backs turned to you was behind them, a mix of people, of which you could vaguely make out Bryan, Matt, Ruffilo, Dakota, Tim, Steven, and even Miles.

Memories of their faces flash back in your mind, back to the night you met them, sitting around in a circle in the greenroom after their concert. They were so kind to give up their space, time, and drinks for a stranger, let alone a fan of theirs.

There was a shift in the crowd that stood around the plastic table, and then you could see Noah. He was sitting down at one of the chairs, glancing between his phone and his friends around him. Dark sunglasses hid his eyes, along with a white graphic tee and some black shorts. He was a simple fashionista, but you’d be damned if you said it didn’t look good on him.

The 10 seconds that you stood there for felt like a lifetime as the bubbling of nerves in your stomach grew. They all seemed to happy and relaxed, and you could help but think, why ruin that?

The devil on your shoulder screamed at you to leave them alone.

They’re happy.

Don’t ruin it for them.

Look how well they’re doing without you there.

You could feel your eyes welling up, threatening to spill over tears at any moment, but you wouldn’t let that happen, especially with the threat of them seeing you like that.

You suck down a shaky breath, holding it in as you turn on your heels. In the end, that voice was right. Why would they need you to join them? A fan, nonetheless, that they met once, to hang out like they were childhood best friends? It was ignorant to think that it could have gone any other way than this.

You could see your car now, almost acting like a safe place. Your steps quickened as you impatiently headed towards your familiar haven to then let the tears fall. That was until you heard your name being called out from behind you. It makes you stop in your tracks. A feeling of panic rises inside your chest as you hear it called a second time.

It was Noah. It was his voice, undeniably, calling out to you.

Your eyes squeezed shut in an effort to fight back the feeling of despair, forcing the tears back. You couldn’t face him like that. You could hear him walking towards you, footfalls growing louder and the keys that jingled by his pocket rang like a warning bell.

Blinking back the fear you still had, you had no choice but to turn and face him. When you did, his face was full of confusion, slightly tilted to the side, eyebrows knitted together like he was trying to figure out what you were doing.

“The food place is this way” he says, pointing with his thumb over his shoulder, glancing back in that direction. “Are you okay?”

“Just got lost, I guess” you lie. He knows. He can tell something is off.

“We’ve been waiting for you. Need some recommendations for this place!” He says enthusiastically. It’s clear as day to see he is trying to cheer you up. He’s reading your situation exactly as it’s playing out. He gives you a look, tilting his head down and raising his eyebrows almost as though to say ‘you coming or what?’

It was his calm demeanour that was the only thing that could have convinced you to stray from your path of heading to the car. The way his eyes pleaded in the gentlest of ways made it feel like it was all going to be okay.

“The burgers are greasy as, and you’ll regret it afterwards, but they’re the best thing I’ve ever eaten” you finally respond with a slightly shaky voice. There’s still an air of hesitancy as you start walking towards Noah, but you admit defeat and cave anyway.

As you step closer, one arm lifts and wraps around your shoulder, pulling you into a side hug as he spins to face the rest of the band of friends. His arm drops and pulls out his phone, taking a quick snap of the food truck as he strides towards it. You need to quicken your pace because the fucker has long legs and walks fast as hell.

As you near the crowd, they turn and meet your gaze. A chorus of “Hey! Good to see you!” “Where have you been? I’m starving!” And “what’s new key-girl” welcomes you.

You throw out a wave, paired with a “good to see you guys again” and a side glance at Noah, who’s smile is beaming as he looks on at the menu hanging on the side of the truck.

The next hour that follows is one filled with jokes, good food, tales from the road and even a short walk down the Main Street of town. Framing each side of the road are buildings of all different architectural styles. Art-deco neighboured modern, which neighboured neoclassical. There was even a gothic-style library building that you walked past. It was something you admired about this small city, it wanted to be so much more than it was, but seemed like it never really got there.

You walked amongst the group, trailing more towards the back, looking up at how the sunlight danced through the buildings, the trees, and reflected on shop front windows. The sky was a picture perfect blue, letting the sun shine down a radiant warm that gently kissed your skin. It was mid-admiration of your surroundings that you see in your peripheral vision that Noah was looking your way. When you finally glanced at him, you were met with a sweet smile, one that was soft but warmed your heart. He looked away quickly, down at his feet, with his hands shoved into his pockets, along with a little giggle as he scuffed a rock with his shoe.

“Thanks for earlier” you say, looking up at him, squinting slightly as the sun was shining behind him, highlighting a glow around his hair, showing every whiff of the wind that tousled loose strands.

“Don’t mention it” he says, swerving to bump his elbow into your side. It took you aback seeing how comfortable he was being this casually playful.

“I wasn't going to come. I was on my way home”

“I know. I could tell. You had the fear of god in your eyes” he said with a smirk. You couldn’t help but notice how one side of his lips curled up a little more than the other when he smiled.

As terrifying as it was to admit, he was right. You were never that good at hiding your emotions, so why would this be any different?

“I’m glad I caught you, though” he continued, looking back at you, with that damn smile again.

“I’m glad too” you reply, looking away from his gaze in an attempt to hide the blushing in your cheeks. There was a moment of silence between the two of you, yet it was comfortable.

You look ahead, glancing between all of the friends, strolling down the Main Street of your town like it was nothing. Like they weren’t these recognisable figures adored by thousands, if not millions. Including you, you admired them. As artists, as people. They had brought you so much joy and yet here you were, just going for a walk with them.

It was only a few minutes later that you reached your destination, the bank of a lake, splitting off into river mouths and down into streams. It was a favourite of yours because of how tranquil it was, how calm it seemed and how it housed an entirely different world beneath the surface that just fascinated you.

There was a concrete wall that ran along the side where the group had started to sit, some propped up and some laying on their backs on the grass next to it.

But you and Noah decided to keep walking for now, continuing the conversation of small talk and banter.

“How long have you lived around here?” Noah asks.

“As long as I can remember. It’s changed a lot over the years. It’s kinda comforting, but it also gets old. I guess it’s different to what you’re used to” you reply, cautiously asking about him, but not wanting to pry.

“Yeah… I guess you could say that. I haven’t really stayed somewhere too long to really get that used to it. I’m at a good place now, though. Living with some of my closest friends” he says, looking ahead into the distance.

“I meant, with tour, you probably see some cool places.”

“Oh, for sure. We have been to some awesome cities, met awesome people. It’s quite a unique lifestyle that’s for sure.” He looks down at you to meet your eyes, “not for the faint of heart”, followed by a wink.

A wink? Dude, come on. You’re already confused about how you feel, and now he throws you a wink? This man.

“It’s a lot of temporary things. Temporary bed. Temporary city. Sometimes temporary people” he was looking out over the water now.

You admire the way he chose his words carefully. It was clear that he had been through some shit, but he was clever and never intentionally dragged up baggage for pity or for entertainment.

“I hope I’m not a temporary person” you say, almost too quiet. He looks at you and smiles, and you panic. Was that too forward? Would he think you’re clingy?

“So do I” he says, then looks away again.

Your heart starts pounding in your chest, and right on schedule, the overthinking-train arrives. What is that supposed to mean? Is he flirting with you? Is this a joke? Are there hidden cameras somewhere filming this whole prank?

Noah can see your mind racing, it might have been the jittery hands or the rapid eye movements to look anywhere but in his direction.

“I hope I haven’t freaked you out” he admits, and in a moment of confidence, you start to question him.

“Is this some kind of cruel prank you play on fans that you meet?” You ask, in an almost harsh tone. Noah is taken aback slightly, pausing his steps to come to a standstill.

“Why would you say that?” He asks sounded offended.

“You can’t blame me. Think about it. Fan meets band. Band and fan hang out. Fan and band become friends. Fan gets feelings for band. This stuff doesn’t happen in real life” you say with a sigh in defeat. Saying it out loud makes it seem more like a joke.

“It’s… it's not a joke. I rarely meet people that seem like good people.” He pauses, thinking of what words to use, carefully plucking them to try and not make you flee. “It’s different for me too, but you seem like someone I really want to get to know”.

There was sincerity in his voice. You looked at him, and there wasn’t an ounce of falsity to him.

“Plus, did you just say that you have feelings for the band?” He asks, cracking a smile.

You throw your head back, covering it with your hands and turn away from him to hide from the embarrassment. Why did you say that? You have feelings for him? What a way to fuck it up now!

“Yeah… I mean… you can’t blame me” you’re stalling. “I mean, have you seen Ruffilo? The man is beautiful”.

Noah smiles and let’s put a small laugh, but his eyes give away that he’s a little offended that you didn’t mention his name.

Fuck. Now does he have the wrong impression? Why is this so hard?

Now you were panicking, trying to think of a way to fix this.

“But really…” you start, trying to quickly think of the right words to say. “Think about it. Even us walking along here together, right now, seems like it’s a bit far-fetched.”

He nods, acknowledging the strange circumstance that led up to this point.

“I don’t want to seem ungrateful. I mean, I get to spend time with you. That’s something I never expected!” You say trying to change the mood, but Noah shifts and crosses his arms, avoiding eye contact.

“No, I get it. It’s to be expected, really. I guess I was a bit delusional for thinking that wouldn’t come up” he looks out over the water, past you, with a solemn expression. I guess you really did hurt his feelings. You internally kicked yourself for royally fucking this all up.

You stop walking, Noah takes one step more than you, then turns to finally meet your gaze. You take a big breath in, close your eyes, and then exhale. Noah looks at you quizzically. When you open your eyes, you give him a soft smile, and hold out your hand to him. He looks at your hand, then back at you.

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you” you say kindly, then offering your name to him.

“Is… this… are you okay?” He asks.

You drop your hand and give him an exasperated look.

“I’m trying to start things over”.

“Oh.. oh okay. Hi, I’m Noah” he states, then holding his hand out. You shake it, feeling the warmth of his hands and noticing the calluses forming.

Noah’s phone pings at that moment, he takes a second to type out a response, then puts it back into his pocket.

“Everything okay?” You ask.

“Yeah. The guys said they’re heading back. I’ll meet up with them later.”

“If you need to go, I won’t be offended”

“We only just met! I can’t leave now, that would be rude” he says with a smirk.

You continue to wander, side by side, for the next 30 minutes, at some stage turning and beginning your walk back to your starting point.

“Are you staying locally?” You ask.

“Yeah, we have a hotel tonight. A nice break from the bus. That thing gets crowded and smells bad real quick.”

“I can drive you back there if you need. Your hoodie is in my car too.”

“I said you could keep that” he glances at you with a side eye smirk.

“I know, I feel bad keeping your stuff though”

“I have probably a million pieces of Bad Omens merch. I can even give you more if you want”

Your mind quickly flashed to the mound of merch for this band that you already own. “I don’t think that’s necessary, thank you for the offer though”

“Fine, suit yourself.” He shrugs. “But I will take you up on the offer to drive me to the hotel. Think of it as that driving tour you promised me last time.”

You smile down at your shoes remembering the interaction, the hoodie he gave you, him making sure you got back to your car safely. He did everything so right, and you were trying everything you could to not stuff this up even more.

By the time you got to your car. The sun was starting to set. You hadn't realized that you had spent half a day with Noah until you turned the headlights on.

Noah slipped into your passenger seat, legs so long that they almost needed to be folded over each other just to fit. He rummaged around for the mechanism to move the seat, and finally found it giving him more leg room as he slid back in the chair. You couldn’t help but let out a giggle at the sight.

“What? Man needs his leg room!” He throws his hands forward, motioning to his long limbs, which we’re still bent just to fit. You shook your head a little, playfully, and then pulled the car out to start your journey.

Noah directed you to his hotel, saying it was about a 10 minute drive from here.

“For someone just passing through, you sure do know your way around” you joke, keeping your eyes on the road. Noah, however, was looking at you, like you were having a full conversation, only glancing ahead to point you directions.

He was a passionate talker when he got out of his shell, spoke with his hands a lot. The boy couldn’t keep them still at one point he was almost twisted completely around just to emphasize the story he was telling. He had you in stitches, the way he recounted events and waited for your response, then gave you time to recover from a laughing fit before he continued. He watched you react to his words, he paid attention to the small details, the crinkles by your eyes when you laughed hard, how you would glance at him throughout the conversation to tell him you were listening, even the way your grip would twist around the steering wheel when he was describing a scary part of the story. He noticed everything about you. And you noticed him noticing you.

You had a moment of realization that he was just a person. A person who laughed, who cried, who’s been through shit and now, is just sitting in your car. The sudden wash of relief, the pressure you were feeling, just gone.

The drive comes to an end and you pull up outside the hotel. Nothing too fancy, just to get them through the night. You look up at the building, half its lights were switched on in the three-storey building.

You turn and look at Noah then, the glowing of the lights bouncing off his face making him look as angelic as ever, so much, that it actually made your heart skip a beat. Trying to make sure he didn’t notice the hitch in your breath, you twist at an awkward angle, reaching for the black hoodie on the back seat.

You couldn’t help by notice Noah lean to look over too, your faces now only an inch apart. So close that you could even feel his warm breath each over your cheek. It didn’t help the state of admiration you were already in.

Your fingers graze the material, grabbing at it and finally twisting back into your position in the drivers seat.

“I believe this belongs to you” you say, handing over the garnet.

“I thought I said…” he spoke, pausing to take the hoodie in his hands and hold it out by its sleeves. He then leaned towards you, stretching his arms above you and wrapping the piece of clothing around your back and over your arms, twisting it into a knot on your chest. “You could keep it.” He finished, smiling triumphantly.

The closeness had you feeling a little lightheaded, maybe because you felt like you forgot to breathe around him, or maybe the low lighting made this interaction feel way more intimate than it was.

“I guess…. Thank you” you say, looking into his eyes. All you could see was a sweet dark chocolate brown staring back at you.

Noah’s hand then takes yours as he plants a light kiss on the back of it, placing it back down into his hands again. You couldn’t help but stare with your mouth ajar slightly at the gentlemanly gesture.

“It’s my pleasure.” He pauses again, looking outside then back to you. “If… if I asked you out on a date, would you hesitate to show up to that too?” He asked, sounding honest in his intention, his eyes looked in your hands together.

“A date?” You gawk, almost too quickly. He nods. “I, uh, no. I wouldn’t.”

“Because I’m still in town tomorrow if you’re free.”

“Tomorrow… tomorrow…? Uhh..Nothing on the agenda that comes to mind.” Honestly, you had no idea if you actually had anything in tomorrow.

“Great. It’s a date. I’ll meet you here at 10?” He asks excitedly, that sweet lopsided grin making a comeback.

Your heart was beating through your chest, it was a miracle that he couldn’t hear it.

“10. That works. I’ll be here.” You say, not sounding that convincing.

“I hope so” he replies, paired with another wink. With that, he opens the car door, stepping outside, and closes it with a gentle thud behind him.

“I’ll see you tomorrow” he says with a wave through the window. You couldn’t help but smile back at him, taking in the image of him gentle waving and glancing over his shoulder as he walks to the door. He enters safely, and on his way to his room.

That’s when the excitement hits. You grip the steering wheel tight and let out a squeal. That’s right, a squeal. You have never squealed before in your life, but this man has you feeling so giddy it’s unreal.

With a deep breath, you pull the car out again, heading home, already running through every possible scenario that could happen at 10am the next day.

Part 3

Masterlist

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