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hyperfixat · 30 days

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hey!! I really love ur blog so so much rn! If you can, I'd like to request a neurodivergent MC? One that has certain foods they hate and have never told anyone since their family had forced them to try them since they were little? (Ex. Cauliflower, brussel sprouts, blueberries, bananas, carrots) and so, one day, when theyre all eating (at the HoL or just out) and they notice MC eating all but those foods on their plate? Sorry if this is a bit too specific, I just really can't write it properly for myself and i would like to have some form of comfort-

Anyway, have an amazing day!!

anon i am holding you so close rignt now this cured my writers block this is the first ask i’ve got in like two months TT

i am incapable of writing anything not hurt comfort so there is some ‘oh man im so sad :(‘ at the beginning but yk if u said u like my writing i imagine u kinda expected this

warning for mentions of throw up and actually eating the bad foods :(

and yes yes yes i love writing explicitly nd mcs!! i added in another obstacle to the req; freaky demon food bcs thats always fun to consider. That way u can kinda make the demon food similar to whatever food u want in ur mind, anyhow, the words u wanted;

You push the pile of purple (purple!?) mashed… something from one corner of your plate to the center. First you had to go to a strange demon school where all of your peers are so much scarier and larger than you and now you’ve been presented with whatever the hell this is for dinner.

You think Leviathan (Levi — it feels so odd referring to him so casually having just met him) was the one that made it. There was a protein on the plate, you ate that with no issues, but.

Urgh. This?

It’s your second night sleeping in the House of Lamentation and you don’t feel nearly comfortable or safe enough to get a snack on your own, especially at night. You’ve had such a long day at RAD and your body is dying for some food.

Disguising your disgusted reluctance with a carefully blank face, your grab some of the. The stuff.

Ah, nope. You set your fork down quietly after taking a slow bite / swallow and grab your cup to drown the leftover flavors and textures.

Luckily all the demon brothers seem pretty into their dinnertime banter and didn’t notice your… less than satisfactory reaction to the food.

Gosh, you don’t want to offend any of them, especially not so early on in the year you’ll have to room with them.

It’s a good thing that Beelzebub is practically a food vacuum and doesn’t question the nearly untouched pile of. Well you know. Left over on your plate.

…It’s official. You hate Devildom cuisine.

Is the universe playing one big, cruel joke on you? What the hell is wrong with demons? Why must the eat the worst things in the world? Why… why… why?

Lucifer wouldn’t let you starve under his roof, and provides you with full meals and makes it clear what parts of the kitchen are free to raid (as not to take anything designated to anyone else). You feel like the most ungrateful human in the whole wide world right now.

It’s been quite a few months since the start of the exchange program and you’ve been… getting by. Okay, that’s not exactly true, you’ve been having a blast in most aspects of your stay in the Devildom. Most.

There’s still the teeny tiny issue of the cuisine not quite fitting your tastes. You’ve tried talking to Solomon about the Devildom cuisine and he tried to cheer you up with some authentic human world cuisine, but as it turns out his cooking is far worse than Devildom-style food.

Not to be dramatic, but you’re suffering in silence. You get by, as in you’re not hungry – the demons you’ve grown oh so fond of wouldn’t let that happen. They always seem willing to fetch you anything.

You’re trying so hard not to hurt any feelings, because you love them and want to support them. It’s just. You want to throw up almost every meal. (Barbatos’ little treats have been your saving grace – he always seems to have some yummy little snack on him. One that you like and doesn’t make you feel like your throat is crawling out of your mouth.)

Most of the time the brothers don’t pay much thought to what you leave on your plate – as long as you eat some of what was served they seem content. Even on nights where the meal is more nasty than good, it’s easy to just say you’re not that hungry.

This night was bound to happen at some point. Your plate is uneatable. It’s edible, just uneatable. It’d be more humiliating to choke down a few bites than it is to go to bed hungry. You wrinkle your nose when you think no one is looking and stab at the meat chunk.

Your eyes are downcast and you drag your knife lazily through the food. It’s mesmerizing in a way, so much so that you don’t notice at first when Asmo calls your name.

“MC, is something wrong? Are you feeling alright?” At this point he’s drawn the attention of his brothers as well.

“Yeah, you’re barely eating,” Mammon supplies.

Ah, the moment you’ve been dreading and hoped you would never have to face.

“Oh, I don’t have much of an appetite right now.” Which certainly isn’t a lie.

“You didn’t eat much at lunch, hon.” Asmo reaches across the table to put the back of his manicured hand on your forehead to feel for a fever.

You cringe, “uhm, well. I’m.” You fail to think of a decent lie quick enough – nothing you say will be believable as you mentally blue screen.

“Honest answer?” Satan prods.

“I’m not the biggest fan of some Devildom foods.” “Not the biggest fan?” Beel questions, “you dislike them enough to forgo eating entirely.”

“I’m trying not to sound like an ungrateful jerk right now. Give me a moment to word this properly.”

Satan scoffs. “Just say it. Whatever you have to say can’t be worse than what we’ve put you through.”

“Damn, okay. The food makes me wanna throw up when I eat it.”

Levi, the chef of the night, folds in on himself, face darkening with shame or embarrassment.

“It’s not a personal gripe, most meals have something that makes me feel that way, hon.” It seems your attempt to comfort him isn’t appreciated though, as Levi shoves his face in his hands.

Lucifer sets his fork down. “And why haven’t you said anything to any of us about this? We want you to feel at home here.”

“You can’t expect me to be comfortable barging into what was at the time a strangers house and demand they make special accommodations for me, then once I was comfortable enough to say something I felt I put up with it long enough that it’d be odd to bring it up out of nowhere.”

“Fair enough,” Satan nods along.

“No? Not ‘fair enough’!” Mammon scolds. “You shoulda said something to me! Do you even like half the snacks I give you? I spent good Grimm on those!”

Memories of bribing Beelzebub to do certain errands in the earlier days of your Devildom stay flicker through your mind. “They got eaten.”

“MC,” Lucifer brings the conversation back on track. “Let us know foods you don’t want to eat, we may be demons, but we’re here to provide you with a comfortable stay.” You nod under his sincere gaze. “Now, give your plate to Beel and order some delivery. I’ll cover the costs, as long as you eat.”

As you shove your plate across the table you see Lucifer pulling a shiny black card from his coat pocket. He gestures for you to come and take it. You walk to the head of the table and he presses the card into your hand.

“Order whatever you’d like. My treat.” There’s a glint of humor in his eyes and you look down to see Goldie in your palm.

#verified hyperfixat post #obey me #obey me x reader #obey me x mc #om hcs #obey me hcs #obey me hurt/comfort #obey me headcanons #obey me headcanon #obey me x you #obey me demon brothers #hyperfixat answers

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kindlingkeen · 9 days

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Yo as the resident Jason Todd fan, maybe you can answer this for me because I haven’t been able to find the answer anywhere else.

At some point in RHATO, Jason gives up his most cherished memory. The one where he’s sick & Bruce stayed home with him.

He was offered it back, and told them to keep it. He refused the offer. I’ve heard that the memory gets mentioned again later but I don’t know if he ever actually really takes it back.

Do you know if he ever gets it back? It’s both sad and not if he doesn’t, because on one hand he’s losing a good memory, but on the other I think it helps cut him off from Batman. Which really might be good for him (looks at all the other comic issues w how Bruce has treated Jason)

Hey, anon. Thanks for the ask! 💙

I’m by no means an expert on the comics, but I did have a bit of a comic-buying hissy fit a bunch of months ago trying to answer this exact question for myself. Here’s what I concluded (complete with pretty pictures because I’m a firm believer in citing your sources):

So in the new 52 rhato #3 (written by Scott Lobdell), Jay, Roy and Kori each give up their most cherished memory to gain entrance to the Chamber of All. The memories are held by Sa’ru (an all powerful being is also apparently a bratty child?).

Sa’ru gives Roy and Kori their memories back when they exit the chamber, but Jay refuses his.

Skip forward a bunch of issues to rhato #19 and Jason actually has Sa’ru take all his memories after a thing with the Joker (that’s a whole different blog post) and he ends up with complete amnesia. The series is being written by James Tynion at this point, not Scott Lobdell.

But Jason eventually gets all of his memories back in rhato #26.

I think you can make a reasonable argument that Tynion intended this to include his most cherished memory, as Jason talks about remembering his finest moments, his lowest moments, etc. Note, the series is still being written by Tynion.

But now skip way way ahead to rhato rebirth #34, and we get this exchange.

So, no, I guess he didn’t get it back? Note, that the series is back to being written by Lobdell at this point.

Honestly, I think this is just another stellar example of dc saying, continuity, consistency? What are these strange and foreign concepts? And thus authors doing whatever they want, to hell with any prior storylines. Tynion was clearing going for an arc where Jason reclaimed his memories. Lobdell had a different idea in mind.

I don’t know that it really matters either way. I mean it’s one memory, right? So even if it’s gone, Jason’s second most cherished memory just moves up into spot numero uno. Based on how much Bruce clearly meant to Jason, and that Bruce was actually a good Dad in most of the comics featuring Robin!Jason, I’m guessing that that memory is of the two of them together, too.

I’d say go with whatever makes you happy and fits your own head canons for Jason. I hate the whole storyline and pretend it doesn’t exist while I stick my tongue out at dc and tell them liberally to fuck right off.

Hopefully that was helpful/informative, or at least worth a merit badge toward my resident Jason Todd fan status (I’m expecting my vest in the mail any day now).

#keen converses #amnesiac jason todd #that think about the most cherished memory #red hood and the outlaws #rhato #rhato rebirth #comics references #jason todd #red hood #bruce wayne #batman

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teecupangel · 2 months

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sooo Desmond is an Irish name, so fae Desmond?? 👀 haven’t been able to get to my laptop to search your blog if you've already done this idea, but I thought I’d throw it out there anyway!

am a big fan of Weird fae, like when you look at them you think they should be human but something about them is so obviously not. uncanny valley with a side of fight-flight-or-freeze instincts kicking in just from being around them.

is this something something that comes from his parents? is it all Isu bullshit? is it something he changes into or is he born with it?? on that vein, what if he was a changeling child? lots of ways of incorporating the Isu and the calculations into that for sure

(am one of the anons who keeps coming back for renaissance baker Desmond, so thank you very much for answering those asks, and also for just being a rad individual in general. am still catching up on Eagle of Alamut, I think I’m around chapter 30, and absolutely LOVE what you've already done with it and where you’re taking it. my sib assures me Altaïr makes his appearance soon, and I'm GREATLY looking forward to it.

thanks again, I hope you're well 🧡) —bread anon

(Thank you! I try my best hahahaha. I am so sorry for being slow on asks and replies TTATT

I hope you’re enjoying the rest of Eagle of Alamut… especially Altaïr’s appearance hehehe)

Desmond Miles always knew he was different.

The other kids call him ‘ugly’ and they don’t like to play with him.

He had cried in his mother’s arms and told her what happened and she just… she looked somber.

She patted his head and held him close, comforted him with soft words and a warm hug.

Never once did she say anything about his face.

He was a little bit older when he realized why they think he was ugly.

There were no mirrors in their home.

Or even in the training building he spent most of his childhood in.

But there was a hand mirror in the infirmary.

Desmond never had a reason to go there. What he lacked in brute strength, he made up by being faster than anyone on the Farm.

He had went to the infirmary to take the first aid kit. One of the other kids had a painful gash on his arm. It wasn’t life-threatening but it needed to be cleaned and disinfected.

Desmond had been ordered to get the first aid.

He supposed it was because he had been the reason the boy had hurt himself, trying to run away from him like he was being chased by demons during a ‘game’ of tag.

They always run like they were scared for their lives when Desmond was ‘it’.

The doctor wasn’t inside so Desmond went towards the cupboard that would have the small boxes of first aids stacked on the bottom shelf.

He stopped when he noticed the hand mirror.

And saw his reflection for the first time.

Desmond Miles was not ugly.

But there was something in his features that made him seemed… strange.

It wasn’t anything that can be physically described about his facial structure.

He looked human but there was something in the human brain that just made it scream ‘danger’.

Desmond couldn’t explain it.

But he could see it.

He didn’t bring the first aid back to training.

He went home.

His mother was cooking something.

“What am I, mama?”

She didn’t seemed surprised by the question. She looked resigned.

She looked like she had been waiting for the day he would ask the very same question.

She led him to the dining room, letting whatever was on the stove continue to simmer in low heat.

“You’re my son, my dear little fairy.”

She didn’t held the same unnatural feel as he felt when he looked at his reflection.

But it didn’t sound like a lie.

Her hands trembled as she caressed his cheeks.

Her smile was genuine as she whispered, “You will always be my baby.”

But he could hear it.

The fear in the voice.

Whatever he was…

He was affecting her too.

Yet she didn’t try to run.

So he hugged her, pressing his face against her stomach.

Her trembling stopped and she held him like she was afraid he was going to disappear from her grasps.

She didn’t fear him if she didn’t see his face.

Whatever he was…

It was the face that scared all of them.

Once upon a time, a young woman married a young man by the orders of her father. The man loved her but she did not. No matter what she did, she could not. She tried to be the best wife she could be.

She did not love him but she bore him a son. A weak little thing, more fragile than glass and smaller than any other child in their little commune.

She loved her child more than anything in the world.

But the world did not.

The child died during one cold winter night while her husband had been away.

In her grief, she took the cold body of her dead child and ran towards the forest, as silent as she was taught by her own father.

She came across a circle of mushrooms.

And heard the whispers of the fairy queen when she stood in the circle of it.

The fairy queen will save her child.

But he will become one of them.

“Yes! I agree! Please, save him!” The mother begged on her knees.

The fairy queen did not do it out of the goodness of her heart.

She was one of three rulers of their little fairy kingdom, long destroyed by the wrath of the sun.

She was nothing more than a ghost, traveling to the far future.

The mother gave the corpse to the ghost.

And the ghost gave it new life.

The mother thanked her as she held the warm body of her son.

And the ghost disappeared.

The mushroom circle melted like metal.

And mother and child returned to their home.

Centuries ago, Minerva saw a future which the Assassins and Templars waste years fighting each other instead of finding a way to save the world.

She saw a future where Desmond Miles would die to save the world in their stead.

So she made a different choice.

There was no one to stop her.

Tinia had long given up, waiting for the end as he drinks and drinks and drinks.

Juno remains imprisoned in the Grand Temple.

She was the only one left.

She changed the trajectory of the Calculations to one where Desmond Miles died as a weak human baby.

She created a device and had it transported to where his mother would walk into in her grief, her mind weakened to the point of thinking of falling off the cliff nearby with her dead son in her arms.

It was a device she had created using Consus’ research.

Consus’ research cannot bring back the dead.

But with Minerva’s modification…

It could clone the dead.

But she didn’t clone the weak human baby that would die centuries from now.

She created a child made of Desmond Miles’ DNA from that tragic future.

And added her own DNA to reinforce his body and mind.

A new future the Calculations could not predict.

A new future where Desmond Miles is both human and not.

Minerva did not know if this would be a better future.

Still…

She does not regret it.

At the very least, before she died…

She was able to save someone.

#fae desmond #ngl #considering how i like to write desmond using fae lies to lie #i was tempted for this to be an actual fae desmond meeting an ac character #who stepped into a mushroom circle #instead you get this…#uuhh #i tried to make it seemed like a dark fairytale at the middle #idk #assassin's creed #ask and answer #teecup writes/has a plot #fic idea: assassin's creed #desmond miles #minerva

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decepti-thots · 2 months

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character ask: idw springer?

First impression: what's this guy's deal. i can't quite put my finger on it.

Impression now: I really, really like Springer in the Wreckers saga. I don't actually talk about him nearly as often as some other characters because I still never feel COMPLETELY sure I have a perfect grasp on the answer to my original question, hah. But he's a very interesting character who I enjoy very, very much! I think Springer is a really great character because the narrative is using him to tell a story, and he's telling a story about himself very persuasively, and those two stories overlap but are not a perfect match. The gaps in between are where the interesting stuff is happening, I think. The Wreckers saga as a whole is a little bit about the distance between narrative and reality, and that's really obvious in Pova and such, but it runs through basically all of Springer's arc IMO. (I am saying again: Springer in Last Stand is way more interesting if you have read Zero Point, and I'm really annoyed forever it's only in the hardback/omnibus.)

Favorite moment: Hmmm. Maybe when he and Verity talk about nightmares in Sins, which is a really small moment I know. I just really love any moment those two get to themselves, tbh. It makes me wibble, haha. But I also like that it's a moment that doesn't like... get "resolved", it's not set up for a cheap payoff later where the problem goes away. It's just there, acknowledged between the both of them.

Idea for a story: I still want to ruin the very good Theme of the ending by taking the time travel shit and really running with the fact we know it's not something IDW1's universe would allow. Just really see how far the doomed to fail at breaking cycles theme there can be taken if you are so inclined.

Unpopular opinion: Do enough people express IDW Springer opinions for there to be one..? Oh actually. I think Kup was probably the best mentor figure in Springer's life for sure, but I also think he was probably still like. One big part of how Springer wound up a trigger-happy soldier who is convinced of his own moral righteousness by way of violence? Like yeah, he was the most formative influence on Springer from practically his first moments alive he remembers- which mostly revolved around being Springer's commanding officer as someone built for war. So…

Favorite relationship: Verity. 100%. I absolutely love their strange little friendship. Everyone who reads my blog knows this, lmao.

Favorite headcanon: Springer wasn't actually designed with an alt mode built in. (Ostaros clearly isn't intended to have one.) I think it would be interesting if Prowl sort of just slapped his artificial spark etc in an MTO body and his not-quite-Cybertronian systems never 100% gelled with it, and Springer is always silently wondering if everyone else feels Weird about transforming and stuff, because the tiny little division between his processor/spark and his body makes everything just… mildly off.

#ask meme

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many-sparrows · 6 months

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Unsure if you're the right person to ask this to, but I trust your blog and it has brought me comfort many times before.

I'm converting to christianity have no desire to go to church, at least, not traditional ones, but I feel like not going to church and not making myself "officially" Christian seems... wrong. At the same time, I have so many beliefs, spiritual and otherwise, that don't align with the church, and in general it's just not a place I'm happy in.

Is it okay to be Christian and not go to church? To not be tied to one?

God bless you and thank you in advance

Ok, been thinking about this ask since I got it. I wanted to take the time to answer it sensitively and thoroughly, but there have been some intense distractions to my ability to think sensitively at the moment (*gestures at the world*)

First of all, I am touched that my blog is a place you find comfort. That surprises me a little bit, because I am simply hanging out. As for whether or not I am the right person to ask, I like to ask all sorts of people these questions; who knows what insights they might give. Then you can sort through what is and isn't of value.

This topic is difficult. It's one that a lot of "non-traditional" Christians deal with. Let's dig in.

You know, I think it is possible to be a Christian and not be tied to a church. Churches can be very difficult places, especially traditional ones. You bring up a very good point about the power dynamics- churches, despite all of the important things in the gospel and the things God has called us to, have been a part of systems that have caused a lot of harm and destruction, and you can't ignore that when making a choice like this. I firmly believe that Christ doesn't want us to do things that endanger our walk with God, and I really do believe that includes avoiding churches that are harmful and hateful and so on. I think God calls us all to our own paths, and our own relationships with Them, and you can never be separated from Him, even if you aren't in a church on Sunday. I spent years of my life not going to church, and had some of the most clarifying, important religious experiences during that time.

However, let me say a word in favor of churches. The whole point of churches, of gathering, of the Sabbath are that we are called together into community. We are called to do this thing together. I really do think that the lack of strong community networks is part of what our society is really struggling with right now. Of course, there are other types of community- friends and school, work, neighborhood groups, mutual aide organizations- and those things are absolutely somewhere you find God. This might be a hot take, but I don't think you should only surround yourself with people of your own religion or that you should only get community from there; Christ didn't do that, for starters, and in this day and age, when churches have become so inaccessible to non Christians, and White Christianity has become so warped and strange, that it's important to not lock yourself inside the church walls. However, it can be very lonely, even when you're a part of groups that share your values, to be the only one coming at it from your faith. We arent just meant to live in community, we are meant to practice our faith in community.

Every one of us struggles sometimes, with doubts and callings and questions, and having people with you makes that doable. I also know that the holy Spirit comes to us in community. When you're with people who share your faith, you know that you are with people that share this walk with you. At the very least you know that they are committed to something bigger than themselves. That is such a very, very precious and grounding thing to hold on to.

Also, none of us is ever going to be 100% correct in the ways that we interpret Scripture on our own. Good clergy have been trained in how to understand and approach scripture and how to meet people where they are, and having access to them is incredibly helpful. Having people to talk about these things with opens your eyes and can help you understand God's instructions better.

This is going to sound cheesy, but what really makes or breaks a church are the people. If you can find a group of people that works for you, everything else is workable.

As for beliefs that don't necessarily align, you'd be surprised how open some churches are. Quakers, for example, aren't even Christian, though plenty of Quakers are themselves Christian. I know many Christians who believe in universal salvation. I know Lutherans and Episcopalians to toe the line with Catholic practices. I know gay Catholics, Catholics that are pro-choice and don't believe in Hell. All this is to say, in some churches, you can make a broader set of beliefs and practices work. In many places, they are welcomed.

The Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, the United Church of Christ, and the Episcopalians are groups that have been actively working to untangle a lot of the problems in traditional church culture-- especially when it comes to racial and queer issues. If you ever feel like you want to access the benefits of churches, these are groups that might be a good place to start exploring, instead of just trying churches until you stumble on one. You also totally can attend churches loosely, when you need or want to, without becoming a member of entrenching yourself. You can rotate between churches. It really is all about you and your walk, babe.

I'm not telling you that you have to go to church. Unfortunately, I cannot give you an answer of what to do, because it has to work for you and whatever you have going on with God. I just want you to know that churches- though they can be scary and difficult and complicated- can also do some very important things for your faith journey. I also don't think that church should ever be the center of someone's spiritual life; Sunday mornings are a chance to ground yourself, a place to land when you need it, something to steady yourself, but not the only time or place God comes to you or that you're supposed to live out the values of the faith.

Regardless, this, and most things in the Christian faith, is not about finding one answer. It is about living in a way that works right now. Churches change, you move, what worked once won't always work forever, and that's ok. The whole point of this thing is to commit to the walk and the process. Of loving your neighbor right here and now. So I hope this helped somewhat. I hope this becomes easier for you-- the most important thing is that Christ is with you and that sets you free from all fear and shame if you let it, no matter how much people try to push those things onto you. I hope you find peace on this and that you find a solution that works for you.

Congratulations on your conversion! We are happy to have you in the family :)

#asks

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oshiawaseni · 10 months

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I recently am now looking through the mha fandom for the first time and discovered your blog. Looking through your posts and analysis you seem like you’re quite knowledgeable about Horikoshi’s writing or him in general and are confident about the potential of bkdk being canon. In fact, quickly looking through the bkdk tags, a lot people on here are quite confident about the relationship, whether viewing it platonic or romantic. Now I kinda expected that, as a bkdk shipper as well, but I became confused when I found alot of people implying that Horikoshi “ships” bkdk or encourages it. For the longest time I’ve only ever consumed the anime and never really knew what’s been going on in the fandom. So I don’t know much about Horikoshi, but I swear I heard way back about him not liking the ship bkdk and deliberately implying the relationship between Izuku and Uruaka. The questions I’m getting at here is, what makes you think that Horikoshi wants bkdk to be canon and is there any hints about it outside of the main anime/manga that supports that? I acknowledge how it’s hinted at that bkdk heavily “need each other” or something like that in the anime/manga, I just always thought it was always going to be platonic and that Izuku and Uruaka will be end game. Maybe it is that and everyone is just joking about Horikoshi, idk I’m confused and lost lol.

Okay what you're asking for is a little strange, because Hori's storytelling really does speak for itself, his heart shows up the most in his writing of bkdk, but here goes…!

In regards to Hori’s feelings about them, hmm I’m going to get there one day soon(tm), but I’ll give you two examples outside the manga that show bkdk are important to him and why Hori is a bkdk like us.

First is when an interviewer was asking about Kirishima saving Katsuki and Hori responded to him with a sentiment that sounded a lot like “actually the takeaway from this scene was bkdk. that it was a bittersweet moment because Izuku couldn’t be the one to take his hand… but the decision was made." He really deflected the topic away from Kirishima and pointed at bkdk "Look at them instead".

Showing importance of that decision to bkdk’s development because THEY are what’s most important to the series, not any of their relationships with the main side characters. (And then we got the parallel to this where Katsuki feels he didn’t have what it took to take Izuku’s hand during the Deku retrieval arc. Regrets, regrets, regrets... everywhere. Now Katsuki is dead and Izuku "still hasn't told him ____")

My second example is something I bring up on twitter a bit, but that's only because it's so validating.

So you know when Katsuki died, every bkdk was crying and/or freaking out, right? Back then the mood was… “How is Izuku going to react to this?” And in a lot of bkdk’s hearts, we imagined Izuku kneeling at Katsuki’s side, embracing him, possibly acting very protectively over his body. People drew fanart of this.

I also had this kind of vision of him... but back then, MANY of us did.

But for the most part, we knew it wouldn’t be practical in the middle of a fight setting and then come January, Horikoshi showed us he felt the exact same way as us about them with his Volume 37 cover “illustration.” It was like a brainworm image of Izuku and Katsuki he couldn't get out of his head unless he drew it for the cover, something he felt bkdk deserved, but he couldn't give it to them in the manga because of the unrealism and impracticality of it happening mid-fight.

What I’m saying is: when Katsuki died, all bkdks dreamed of Izuku holding him close and/or protecting him and Horikoshi turned that collective vision, that many of us felt in our hearts, into a freaking volume cover.

As bkdks, we have this idea in our heads of these characters; what motivates them, what or who are important to them, because this far along the story, these characters are basically writing themselves. And by him and us connecting on this feeling Izuku has with Katsuki, Hori is confirming the way we see Izuku and the importance of his intense love for Katsuki as "the correct version" of Izuku that also exists in HIS mind, and he showed his hand to us of him being the biggest bkdk out of all of us. He quite literally is our King of BkDk.

The reveal of this cover is the moment I knew, without a doubt, that Hori was one of us. And that's not even factoring in that Edgeshot quote. Even that is a whole thing in itself to unpack, which I've done multiple times already.

If Hori's chosen composition and overall mood for this cover weren't already damning enough evidence for his love of bkdk and intent on making them canon, the other thing of note is that the red fingers in their background are HEAVILY inspired by Berserk.

When I saw it, I got flashbacks of the eclipse, and the hand that lifted Griffith out of Guts' reach. It also turns out there was a very similar "lovers" pose between Guts and Casca for that eclipse content. And then there are all of those Spider-Man death embraces with Gwen Stacy.

The inspirations for this volume 37 for the hero comic-loving Horikoshi are quite clear: Izuku is embracing his future lover.

#bkdk #bkdk canon #bakudeku #dkbk #kana writes #asks #btw anon hori hasn't said anything about izuocha being romantic himself - izuochas like to make up a lot of unsubstantiated claims #it's probably something like that

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absolutebl · 2 years

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10 Favorite Complex Characters in BL

This post sparked by @solitaryandwandering ‘s question here.

Essentially they wanted to know some of my favorite fully realized (deep) characters rather than one dimensional archetypes. This is a challenge in BL. Especially for fans like me who are often attracted to characters with the least screen time, because we can make them whatever we want with our imaginations.

But this is about portrayal of complex, thoughtful, well rounded characters. The least artificial, tropey, and archetypal. I started this blog to track the later, not the former. Because the former is all too often in the gritty, sad, dark, heavily queer narratives. But I will take up the challenge and confine myself to picking leads only.

1. Nosue

Actually the first character who came to mind when asked this question. I have talked about Old Fashion Cupcake at length and I ADORE Togawa, but Nosue is a much more complicated character. He is outgoing, popular, and a blatant flirt, but closed off and lonely. He knows he is in trouble, and he knows he did it to himself, but can’t figure out how to get out of his life state or malaise. He is profoundly self aware and instinctively empathic, while being entirely unable to understand how anyone actually feels about him. He can see his own flaws but not anyone else’s. He has capacity to love but doesn't trust himself to do so, and cannot recognize affection when it surrounds him. This character could only be at this point in his life journey, no younger character or actor could ever have carried off this role with all its contrasts and nuance. He is the opposite of one dimensional. He’s almost 4th dimensional, where he occupies time and space on this plane of existence is an integral part of his identity.

2. Ae

Crazy to put a Mame character on this list but I defy you to dislike Ae from Love By Chance. He was probubly my first great love in the arena of complex characters in BL. He comes off as deceptively simple at first, and then we keep learning things about him - his demi nature contrasted to his tough defensive personality. His instant and unprecedented affection and need to care for the lost hurt extremely shy rich gay boy is both very weird and totally understandable. We know his character: sarcastic, brash, grumpy, and street smart but also loyal and casually affectionate. Pete permits Ae to showcase his best and softest nature, without any risk of hurt or damage. (Although Ae can, of course, damage Pete with his ignorance.) Watching Ae figure out himself, and what his strange sudden need to look after Pete is all about (love rather than friendship) is such a joyful ride. For all his rough exterior we know Ae will make it through his own confusion into solid affection, there is no other way his character would allow them to be. Ae is very solid in himself as a person, even if he has some shock realizing that personhood is queer. The fact that Perth acted this complex of a part when his was 16 is mind boggling. What Mame did to Ae’s character in LBC2 is unforgivable.

3. JiWoo

To My Star 1 & 2. I didn’t like the 2nd installment, but that doesn’t mean I didn't understand it or his character’s behavior, because it was set up so well in the first. (I just didn’t enjoy the pacing or structure of season 2.)

Korea doesn’t normally specialize in complex characters for their BL. In fact, they tend to go for the most archetypal, which is fine with me. I mean Semantic Error is top of my list and those 2 couldn’t be more basic archetypes. Okay, so why does Korea do this? Well partly because Korea doesn't have enough screen time to build backstory, and also because of their “queer bubble” perspective we never get depth of character from home life, parents, or coming out sequences.

JiWoo is the opposite. We learn (eventually) all about him but that isn’t even particularly necessary. JiWoo has walls, tall thick well-established walls, but it is very clear those walls are from being hurt by the world. Slowly we learn bits of why, but what makes JiWoo deep and complicated, is that despite his walls we can still see him falling in love. And who does he pick? The most inappropriate person for someone scared of being hurt: a capricious, outgoing, sunshine, famous actor. And a man. It’s like JiWoo’s own heart wants to give hem more reasons to build more walls. Every time JiWoo allows himself the luxury of that despite-himself-charmed sudden bright smile, our hearts break for him. Because it cost him, and will cost him, so much to be happy. Because of what he has allowed the world to do to him, and his own natural reactions to it. JiWoo doesn’t want to be loved because he is terrified of loving someone back, because he knows how much of himself he is willing to give up when he does that. And who, in all honestly, hasn’t been there?

4. Yuzuru

Seven Days. I know, I KNOW. Look, I realize his is a character type that Japan explores often. But that doesn’t make him any less interesting or complex. Yuzuru is beautiful but also very bold, brash, blunt, uncompromising, and stubborn, and he won’t change himself for any reason. This blatant mercurial individualism in a culture that finds such behavior confusing at best and worth crushing at worst, enables Yuzuru’s classic tsundere behavior beautifully. Yuzuru shows us how deep characterization can be activated to bolster one of the genre’s most enduring archetypes, and that’s really fun to watch. Yuzuru is not just “tsundere with good reason,” (which is all we can usually hope for) he’s tsundere with INTENT. His love for Sereyo springs from his conflict with society, because for the first time someone likes him not despite his uncompromising personality, but because of it.

5. Amber

DNA Says Love You. The ultimate complicated character who could have been profoundly miss-handled with one tiny misstep. But this performance got handed off to an actor who made the character incandescent instead. Amber is extremely scared and keeps his identity and past intentionally hidden from us and the other characters, which easily could have felt manipulative or frustrating for audiences. Instead, we feel that this is for very good reason, so much so that the twist isn’t a twist anymore. Instead of hiding and lying without fault, instead of being a wet blanket without reason, Amber hurts to lie but does it because he wants one taste of what could have been. He doesn't expect anything more. He expects to be shunned. And he is gentle and kind and sweet about it, because that is who he is as a person, even as he struggles to protect himself and his new friends from the truth. It was deft handling of questionable content, and we don’t get adroitness from Taiwan often. Because of the way Amber is portrayed the character seems more deep and complex. This is one of those where the actor brought much more to the role than the role provided, and it’s rather remarkable to watch.

6. Thun

He’s Coming to Me. Imagine growing up as a kid who can see ghosts, but being mature enough from the start not to tell anyone about it. Then imagine falling in love with the ghost of your mother’s ex-boyfriend. Oh the drama of it all! Ohm is in peak form for this role, and his performance is outstanding. Thun is a very lovable character, brash and open, but treasuring this intense secret, while being devoted to uncovering other people’s truths. Thun is able to stand up to authority in a way that is beaten out of most men of his age and social status. His relationship to his mother, to his friends, and to his lover is varied and nuanced, and that gives him, the cheerful himbo character, so much more nuance too, because he is so clearly defined by all the tendrils and threads that anchor him to reality, vital when one lives partly stuck in the afterlife.

7. Shun

His the movie. Another character type that Japan loves, the introvert, and another execution where it is given reason and intent. Shun always had it in him to withdraw in order to protect himself from the world, but after Nagisa left him, he withdrew from the world entirely. His is about the world trying to reclaim him. The tiny country retirement village who adopted him while he wasn’t looking. Add to that Nagisa, and his daughter, coming back. What we watch is Shun’s quiet struggle to accept all three, despite the hurt that opening himself back up to relationships (family, fatherhood, lover) carries with it. He is a wonderfully complex character.

8. Pete

The Kiss series and Dark Blue Kiss. Tay’s portrayal of Pete is consistent even across a conflicted timeline and some weird narrative choices. By the time DBK rolls around we know exactly who Pete is. In any other hands this kind of drawn-out tsundere seme would have been very one dimensional. But Pete is complicated for your standard himbo bisexual character. He’s conflicted about his responsibilities as a son but proud to have the support of such a kind father, frustrated about not being open but not intersted in being famous. His love is devoted, but he is a capricious person. He isn’t very academically smart but he has a high emotional IQ, he reads people well. He is quick to anger but also quick to forgive. He is fiercely loyal even to his ex-boyfriend, but also willfully obtuse. For a character who, in Thailand’s hands, should have been one note, Pete is as consuming and as sweeping as the intro music to DBK, and just like that music a bit overdramatic. But I love this drama queen clown.

9. Mork

My Ride’s Mork is kinda like the Ae of the next generation. He’s more lively and cheerful, less of a grump, but he does represent for the lower class. Struggling with money, work, family, and romance, he falls deeply in love with a doctor even though he thinks he hasn’t anything to offer. Mork’s struggles around bisexual identity play second fiddle to the fact that Tawan is already in love with someone else and socially so far above him that Mork consigns himself to friendship. He knows how to love though, and he does it deeply and from the sidelines, as a support network and as a friend to Tawan. And he would have willingly stayed there, had Tawan had a happy relationship. It’s really great to see pining executed from start to finish, as in: Mork isn’t a “pining since childhood” trope. We see him meet and like Tawan as a friend, fall in love with him, and then have to take a back seat and wait for his love to be returned. Mork has a developed depth of character because of this, and we are never angry with him for this behavior. We know exactly why he does it, and we too are willing to wait. A Thai pulp that not only requires patience (they all do) but teaches it? That’s some great characterization.

Also, SINGLE DIMPLE. (Look, these characters may be deep, but I’m not.)

10. Noh

Love Sick. Another very young actor handed an extremely complicated role and pulling it off with aplomb. Noh is awkward and popular, sweet and tough, kind and loving, and really profoundly unwilling to hurt. Watching him slowly fall in love with Phun, and Phun’s casual rich-kid entitled hot/cold affection, is heart wrenching. Watching Noh tackle Yuri’s demanding attentions while not wanting to cause her pain, even though he is deeply in love with someone else, hurts us, and both of them. Love Sick is a great coming of age narrative. It handles all the ramifications of queerness that a kid of that age might deal with but with in a dexterous and deeply private way. Plus Noh’s LINES. The words Captain gets to say are some of the greatest ever scripted in BL.

“It is a terrible thing not knowing where the line is between us.”

Could there be any better way of putting the conflict over moving from friends to lovers? From heterosexual to something more? The fear of not knowing if you should move towards romance when friendship is put at risk. COME ON. Noh is a remarkable character.

Honorable mention:

Hasimoto

My Love Mix Up. Trust Japan to take the character that any other country would have turned into evil femme fetale and make her the heroine of this narrative. She’s a spectacular character, she handles her own crush and other people’s with humor and aplomb. She is fiercely defensive of her friends, tiny but mighty. One she decides to love someone, she does it with every fiber of her being, even though she can get very shy. We don’t know a ton about her, because she is a support role, but that didn’t stop me from enjoying all the layers that are revealed about her during the course of this narrative. One of my favorite things about this show was watching her and Aoki’s friendship grow and evolve, more so even than Aoki and Ida’s romance.

White & Black

Gun’s execution of the twins in Not Me. I doubted he could do it. He did it. Each one was complicated and different and so was their relationship. All the cheering, it was IMPRESSIVE.

Some others I considered but did not make the list for various reasons:

Tutor in Why R U?

Dean in Until We Meet Again

Pick in Puppy Honey

Vald in Like in the Movies

SiWon in Blueming

(source)

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femmefatalevibe · 1 year

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Hello! I hope your day is going well. I absolutely love your blog, it’s super helpful!

My question is, how do I stop seeking attention/and stop being the comic relief friend? Before my “glow up” I was designed as the comic relief friend and was only kept around my old “friends” to keep them happy and because of my happy energy (they treated me terribly and insulted my body and looks a lot).

Now that I’ve been taking care of myself, changed my look, and outfits I’m witnessing the switch with how people treat me. But since I’m still operating in the “comic relief friend type” still people find me… a bit strange. I’m noticing this is no longer beneficial for me.

How do I just be, if that makes sense —so I can stop trying to stand out and be “funny” all the time, or the seeking attention behavior to make everyone else around me feel better. (I even over compliment girls I think is very pretty— they seem annoyed or uncomfortable by it) Being that type of person, no longer helps me.

I mean this in the most humble way possible! Thank you

Hi love! Thanks so much. Congratulations on making these positive habit changes that have helped you feel more comfortable in yourself and your appearance. Give yourself the praise you deserve for this accomplishment!

It is great that you had the self-awareness to recognize this self-sabotaging habit. The best advice I can give is to become aware of and allow yourself to act as though you're the effortlessly "cool" and "popular" girl. Ask yourself:

How would she hold herself and speak to others?

How would she compliment others to make them feel good but not appear as though she's overcompensating for something?

What mannerisms, beliefs, and speech do you associate with someone who has a quiet inner confidence?

Write these qualities and behaviors out if needed. Then, practice emulating this person until you become her. Remind yourself that you are the hottest woman in the room who embodies the most radiant, magnetic energy and attitude. Believe it until you become her.

Hope this helps xx

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jakekiszska · 2 years

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cosmic kiss

alien!josh kiszka x female!reader

a/n: if this fic is familiar to you that is because i wrote it last year during spooky season & posted it to my old blog, stardustschords. i’ve added to it a bit and now i’m reposting. my best friend @alwayzthere helped me with the ideas here last year when i wrote this. PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS.

warnings: explicit sexual content, 18+. in this fic, josh is an extra-terrestrial being. all parties are consenting. josh has magic hands and an even more magical tongue. (i have added a disclaimer to the end in case the “plot twist” doesn’t make sense.)

tags: pls let me know if you’d like to be added or removed. @alwayzthere @strangersingold @garbagevanfleet @harmonyhous @obetrolncocktails @godlygreta @gardenvanfleet @singingmangoes @tripthelight-fanfic @theweightofstardust @teddiie @gretavanfleas @brokenbellz @jordierama

“aliens aren’t fucking real, daniel. you’re ridiculous. the fact that you drug me out into this cornfield in the middle of the night is bullshit!” you spew, angry that you’d once again agreed to danny’s shenanigans. apparently sam was unavailable, so daniel forced you to accompany him on his overnight attempt at proving aliens did, in fact, exist.

“i brought blankets and snacks!” he says, flashing you a warm smile, but you didn’t reciprocate. “it’s cold as fuck out here danny, this is so dumb.” you chide, smacking him lightly on the shoulder. you watch as he pulls out some filming equipment, and he giggles as you ask where he got it from. “i borrowed it from the twins.” he goes on to explain to you that cell phone cameras are less likely to capture paranormal or extra-terrestrial activity, so it’s better to use film cameras or disposable.

the twins were sam’s older brothers. jake was the younger twin, by five minutes, which josh made known every chance he got, and he was talented and musical and just fun to be around. josh, however… was a different story. to say you had it bad for josh was an understatement. he was theatrical, loud, and he carried himself with such a lovely, confident air. any time you saw his smile you swore you could take off in flight. you’d told daniel about your crush, but you could never tell sam, because you knew he’d rat you out.

you scoffed at daniel, scolding him for borrowing their equipment for such an idiotic idea. he shook his head at you before going back to setting up.

when he was done he helped you lay out the blanket, and you just sat with him for a while and talked. “danny, this is dumb. can we go home?” you question, but he shakes his head no. “we have to wait! i know aliens are real and i saw online that tonight was the perfect night. just be patient, y/n.”

“this is like when linus spent all night waiting for the great pumpkin.”

☆☆☆

you tried to be patient, but you fell asleep. you were convinced you’d been having some strange dream until you opened your eyes to a solid white room, and your body strapped to a very cold metal table. you blinked your eyes rapidly, unsure of what was going on, and you saw two people standing over in the corner.

in your dream, you remembered a bright light droning down upon you and danny, but after that, everything went black. the people in the corner walked over to you, and you noticed a strange looking woman and…. josh?

you looked over at him and he smiled at you, and all you could do was cry. “please let me up from this table, josh. this isn’t funny. you guys got your halloween prank.”

you saw the woman next to him, who had the strangest eyes you’d ever seen, jotting your every word down on to a notepad. “hello, young one,” josh stated, reaching out to wrap a strand of your hair around his finger, “i am not your friend josh. we are extraterrestrials, and i have taken the form of that whom you most desire.”

tears began to flow even more as you realized that danny HAD told josh of your crush. he looked over at the woman, who you’d assumed he’d hired on for the act, and made a face at her, to which she continued to write. “look, i know this is funny to you guys. i’m sure you probably hired all these people that you knew from your acting and had them help you set all this up, but josh, i’m begging you. please let me go home.”

“listen, pet. i’m sorry that this is confusing for you. since you don’t believe me, i can show you if you’d like.” he speaks, his tone soft and endearing. you shake your head yes at him, and he slowly reaches out to trace a finger up your arm. the moment his digit traced your skin, you felt vibrations begin to flow through you, and the place where he touched you began to glow iridescent.

you stare at him with a bewildered look, but he just flashes you that beautiful smile. “i know this is confusing, and you can still call me josh if you’d like.” you aren’t sure what to say, so you keep quiet. he turns to the woman and nods once and she exits the room. once she’s gone, josh unhooks you from the few wires attached to your forearms and lets the straps binding you to the table loose.

you rub your arms to soothe where the restraints had been and you looked over to josh - the alien - to see what he’d say next. you sat up from the table and glanced around the room. he smiled at you before reaching out and tucking your hair behind your ear. “would you like to know why you’re here?” he asked, and you shook your head yes. you still only half believed this was happening. “i’m very interested in human-kind… and their carnal desires. because i can take the shape of your greatest desire, i’d like to know the reactions you’d give to him if he were to touch you. does that make sense?”

“not really,” you respond, “i still don’t really believe you. this is so weird.” he lets out a soft laugh and runs a hand along your arm, sending shockwaves through you. “you should trust in me, pet. i won’t hurt you” he says, leaning in to you to smell your hair. he places a soft kiss to your ear before asking, “is this okay? may i touch you?”

you nod your head yes and so he reaches down to wrap his hand around your wrist before squeezing it. you can feel the vibrations running up your arm again, matching your heartbeat and creating a deep thrum through your chest. his other hand glides along your jawline, cupping it, and he pulls his face away from your hair to make eye contact with you. before you can register what you’re doing, you grab him by the back of the head and kiss him, your lips meeting ungraciously.

you feel him laugh into your mouth before indulging you for a short moment. his lips are soft and pink and taste vaguely of strawberry, and though it may not be the real josh, you feel drunk from his kiss. he pulls away after a minute or so, and you can feel heat rise to your cheeks as you await his reaction. “i see you’re quite impulsive” he says, rubbing his hands up both your arms. you let a soft laugh fall from your lips before telling him, “i’d never have the guts to do that to the real josh.”

he stares at you for a moment before asking if he can continue, and you tell him yes. he leans back into you, pressing kisses to your jaw, and slowly starts to work his way down your neck. he skirts his fingers just below the hem of your shirt, and suddenly, you feel bold once again. you grab the thin material and whip it over your head, tossing it down to the floor. his eyes widen for a moment as he notices your lace bralette, but then he reaches a hand out to cup your breast over it.

he gradually begins to trail kisses down your neck and into the valley of your breasts before he slips a hand under the bralette and works it over your head himself. you let him take it off you and he throws it down to meet your shirt, and then trails even more kisses over your newly exposed flesh. you arch forward into his touch and you hear him hum in satisfaction as he latches his mouth around one of your nipples. the feeling of his mouth on you with the added vibration that you’re given from his touch is making your brain cloud, and you close your eyes so as not to get dizzy. he pulls away from you softly to ask you to look at him, and you try your best to keep your eyes open.

once he’s satisfied with the work he’s done on your chest, he continues down your stomach, dropping to his knees on the floor. he looks up at you through his eyelashes and you feel your heart melt, until he asks you, “may i taste you?”

you don’t think that you can ever speak again, much less answer his question with a single word, so you just nod your head yes and lean back slightly on the table. he slowly pulls your pants and underwear down your legs, and then he helps you position yourself so that your knees are bent and your feet are flat on the cool metal. he leans into you slowly, pressing kisses to your thighs, and then slowly begins to roll your clit with his tongue. you make eye contact with him and he takes it as encouragement to continue, and you mewl as you feel his strong hands wrap around your thighs to hold you closer to him.

at first when you feel his tongue prodding at your hole, you jump, but then your body melts into him as a wave of euphoria washes over you. at first it feels gentle, as it would if you were being eaten out by a normal human… but then it changes. you can feel the muscle begin to grow thicker and longer inside of you, and josh curls it upward to press into your g-spot. his grip on your thighs changes as he begins to radiate vibration back into you, and you’re sure the noises leaving your body are other-wordly.

you stare down at him, his face pressed into you, and you think you’re going to black out when he flashes you a wink. his tongue is so deep inside of you that you can feel it hitting your cervix, and you struggle against his grasp as you try to push yourself farther down onto him, if at all possible. you feel him laugh against you and the added vibration of his voice almost knocks you over the edge. every languid movement he makes inside of you pushes you closer and closer to your impending orgasm, but just before you cum, he stops. he moves his face away from you and stands, and you almost begin to sob from the loss of contact. “it’s okay, don’t cry,” he says softly, leaning back into your neck and kissing you, “we aren’t done. i just want to feel you cum around me, that’s all.”

he begins to suck and bite at your neck slowly, painting the skin with pink and purple marks. you’ll be glad to reminisce over those for the next few days. you grab his shoulders and push him backwards slightly before gripping your fingers into his hair and pulling him towards you, your mouth meeting his clavicle. you bite into it gently, because if you get marks so does he, alien or not. he moves slightly to lift his shirt over his head and you blush realizing that you’re completely exposed to him while he’s been fully clothed.

you watch him as he tugs his pants down his legs, following with his underwear. his cock springs upward against his abdomen and you find yourself blushing at the sight of it. it’s beautiful, like him, and you wonder if that’s what josh ACTUALLY looks like naked. as if he can read your mind, he hooks a finger under your chin and whispers, “what you’re seeing is what you get, baby.”

you lean back a little farther on the table and he places himself between your legs, slowly inching his cock towards you. you whimper as you feel him slide it through your folds and tap it against your clit. once he’s done teasing he pushes into the hilt, and the feeling of him buried inside you is almost enough to make you cum right then. he begins to rock himself in and out of you slowly, and you grab onto his hands and squeeze them hard. you’ve never been made to feel this way before, and your body isn’t sure how to react.

every inch of your body is slowly being coated with pleasure, and every movement from josh is a driving force tipping you over the ledge. “cum for me, it’s okay” he assures you, and you can feel yourself slipping after only a few moments of him fucking you. it doesn’t take long for him to cum either, his body working over yours with soft grunts and pants. once he’s finished he pulls out, and then sweetly helps you clean up before you slip into unconsciousness.

☆☆☆

your body jolts awake suddenly, and after rubbing your eyes a few times you realize you’re in daniel’s room. you look over to the floor and see a pile of blankets there, so you assume that’s where he slept. he walks casually through the door, scrunching his hair with a towel, and smiles at you.

“did you sleep okay?” he questions, and you give him a strange look. “i had this crazy ass dream, actually. how’d we get back here?”

he tells you that he got bored after you dozed off and decided the trip was dumb, so he helped you into the car and you just came back and crashed at his place. you nod, your focus still lingering on the dream you’d just had. “go get cleaned up,” he says, tossing you a hoodie, “we’re picking the kiszka’s up and going to breakfast.”

you walk down the hall to his bathroom and inspect yourself in the mirror, sucking in a sharp gasp when you see your neck littered with marks… so you hadn’t been dreaming all along. you wash up and change your clothes before meeting danny outside, slipping into the front passenger seat next to him. he makes the short drive to the boys apartment, and you laugh as you see them stroll outside.

jake hops in behind you, wishing you a good morning and giving you a soft smile before smirking at the marks you’ve got on your throat. josh clambers into the car next, scooting himself into the middle seat. he says nothing, but he has a playful grin on his face. next comes sam, and as he gets in the car he curses and tells josh to “scoot the fuck over.”

josh doesn’t oblige, but you can tell they’ve been bickering all morning because jake seems to have had enough. he grabs josh by the collar of his shirt and yanks him closer to his side, and your breath hitches in your throat as his left clavicle is exposed to you. a bite mark in the shape of your mouth is forming there, deep and purple.

josh doesn’t say a word, but he meets your gaze in the rearview before winking at you, and then sticking out his tongue tauntingly.

•••

disclaimer: josh was an alien the whole time. lived an entire life on earth as an alien. he probably is one in real life. who’s to say?

#greta van fleet #greta van fanfic #greta van fleet fic #gvf smut #greta van fleet smut #josh kiszka #jake kiszka #danny wagner #sam kiszka #josh kiszka smut #gvf josh #josh fic #spooky fic #josh fanfic #josh kiszka fanfic

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intrepidacious · 2 years

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Idk if you answer this type of questions but how is reader and bucky from set me free? 🥺💙 What are they up to? I loved them so much, and now I'm attached. Are they living together in the city? Or maybe it was overwhelming and they moved to a small town or a cabin in the woods?

well you’re actually the first person to ever ask this type of question 🥺 with most of my stories, i’m done thinking about them by the time i stop writing, but luckily for you, these two are very dear to me as well. so i do have a few thoughts

being understood

pairing: bucky barnes x (former) nymph!reader

word count: 1.1k

warnings: an uncharacteristic amount of fluff

please note that my blog is rated 18+. minors dni. ageless/empty blogs will be blocked without warning.

a/n: this is a continuation of my fic set me free, please read that one first!! title is, once again, taken from the little mermaid musical <3

life as a human is different than you’d expected

mostly, it’s in a good way, but they really overcomplicate things wherever they can, don’t they?

but it doesn’t matter, because you’re not alone in this

it takes two weeks to cross the atlantic, on a ship you would have smelled from miles away just a few days ago, but now you find that, strangely enough, you don’t mind as much

you hate wearing shoes though. bucky still has to force them on your feet

"you’re gonna freeze to death, angel, and then what’ll become of me?"

he gets a glare for that, until he distracts you with a kiss

(it’s one of the better developments by far)

and you talk

you’ve been telling each other stories for a long time at this point, but now you don’t have to hold back anymore. now it’s not a tediously slow thing that takes hours to coax out of a dried up pen

you haven’t talked this much in years, decades maybe, because who would you have talked to, and about what? the river knew the seasons just as well as you did

now, though, for the first time in your life, you’ve got some catching up to do. and you love it

when you get to new york, you both move in with bucky’s family at first. because of course you do

winnie loves you immediately, and so do the twins, but rebecca’s a little more apprehensive. she’s like her father in that sense

they both feel that something isn’t quite normal with you

you’ve decided that you weren’t going to tell anyone else about your past

(you’re pretty sure steve knows, and some of the howlies at least suspect, but no one has ever confronted you about it, and you can live with things being a bit up in the air)

not that they’d believe you, anyway. you’ve found that believing in things beyond what is considered "rational" has dwindled horrifically over the centuries

your best bet, then, is to wait and to hope. you’re quite good at that

and thankfully, becca trusts her brother enough to let herself slowly warm up to you until one day, she offers to teach you how to braid challah

(you manage until the dough needs proofing, which is when you excuse yourself to the fire escape, breathing in the cool night air that smells faintly of smoke and dust, blinking until your vision doesn’t blur anymore. this is happy, you think. and then bucky ducks out to wrap his jacket around your shoulder and you marvel at the fact that happiness is a thing that expands every time you think you’ve reached its peak)

it’s nice, living with his family, and you can tell bucky needed this

he’s still in a lot of pain because of his arm, even though he tries to shield you from it

but you feel it, still, in your skin, your blood, your bones. his nightmares and yours work in tandem

some days, trying to kiss the doubts away just isn’t enough

whenever that happens, you’re both drawn to the water

it’s different from the one you called home, salty and wild, but it knows you, and it knows him. water changes, but it doesn’t forget

so when you walk along the beach on coney island hand in hand, blasted shoes left behind for once, and the sea laps at your toes, it’s like a gentle caress

being remembered, being understood by something so much larger than yourselves seems like an almost heartbreaking reassurance

(that longing will stay with you for the rest of your days, but you learn to live with the ache)

after a while, though, you both get restless

there’s just not enough room for seven people. bucky constantly feels like he’s in everyone’s way, and the kids have long given up trying to teach you pinochle

"what do you think we try'n get our own place? just you and me?"

the question is whispered into your ear in the dead of night, as if he were seriously thinking you capable of refusing an idea as wonderful as that

"or," he continues, because he can’t see the smile spreading on your face, "we can use some of that pension of mine and just get out of town for a while"

your hands find his face, tracing its sharp edges until you feel them soften underneath your fingertips

"doesn’t matter where we go. but i wanna go with you"

you’re not hurried in deciding your future. you’ve started to learn that while human years might be short, their days are long. and you have time

besides, steve made some arrangements that require bucky to go into manhattan several times a week

(howard stark, you learn, is not a doctor, but he’s a smart man, and there are some tricks he’s thought up to use broken fins again)

he seems lighter than you’ve ever known him, despite the additional weight on his shoulder

your boy hates feeling useless, even if no one’s ever thought him so

by the way his face lights up the first time he manages to move metal fingertips, you suppose this is a good development

it gives him some of that confidence back that you’d only seen flickers of before

bucky proposes to you for the second time on that beach on coney island, after you've been laughing and shouting through the afternoon and pressing into his side on terrifying rollercoasters you curse his name for

he’s so nervous, down on one knee, that you almost feel bad for laughing with the joy bubbling up inside of you when you tell him that you already accepted him weeks ago

he blushes again, and that pink tingeing his cheeks is quickly becoming your favourite colour

his grandma's ring fits your finger perfectly, and the fact that it’s adorned with a tiny pearl found in the depths of the sea generations ago seems fateful

(careful, pearl, your mother used to say, and maybe she knew even then that you’d never learn to listen. that you were destined for something other than the loneliness of rivers and stones. something grander like the ocean you fell in love with; the one in bucky’s eyes)

"let’s see the world," you whisper against his lips, and you feel that beautiful smile of his more than you see it

you’re more than ready for the rest of your happy ending

thank you for reading!! if you want to see more of my writing, check out my masterlist or follow @intrepidacious-fics for update notifications!! also, i have a ko-fi now if you want to support me on there <3

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes x you #bucky x reader #bucky barnes headcanon #bucky barnes fanfiction #marvel fanfic #mcu fanfic #carrotfantasimp #inbox #set me free #being understood

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maxwell-grant · 1 year

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Hi. Just found your blog--greatly enjoy your writing! Now, a question: Are there any popular female pulp heroes? What were they like? Thx in advance.

Thanks! Well, popular is a strong word, most people start with asking "were there any female pulp heroes? like, at all?", the answer to which is, Yes!...Nowhere as much as there were male ones, and not in the traditionally accessed avenues for "pulp heroes", but yes, there were, I wrote a bit about them here. Not counting the female sidekicks of male pulp heroes because that's cheating, the most popular female pulp heroes are the ones that exist by proximity to that American pulp hero “scene”, which I must stress again, doesn’t really have that much to do with what pulp fiction was actually like during it’s heyday, but rather that amorphous concept of what people imagine a pulp hero to be like.

In that regard, a popular female pulp hero would have to be a character that managed to break through in some form and inhabit that pop culture archetypal space in some form, or at least linger around in some noteworthy fashion. To an extent, this is something that was achieved more by female villains, in particular H.Rider Haggard’s Ayesha as well as other characters like Shamblau, Black Margot / Princess Margaret of the Black Flame, and Irma Vep who made for memorable, impactful villains of popularity and status approaching that of the male heroes.

With that in mind, upfront I’d argue that there’s at least six unambiguously popular female pulp heroines, and those would be:

The Domino Lady, a masked Gentleman Thief who was a rare example of a female masked vigilante who was actually published in 1930s American pulp fiction. The Domino Lady is, predictably, the least popular of these, but she’s historically significant and fairly popular in her own right and usually featured in stories or images that place all the masked avengers together.

Pat Savage (illustration by Dan Schkade), Science Adventurer Doc Savage’s rowdy tomboy cousin, and Dejah Thoris, the famous princess of Mars from the John Carter saga (key progenitor of the Planetary Romance subgenre), who are kind of on the sidekick side of things, but there's been enough solo outings for them, and the two of them being fairly significant and influential characters in their own right, that I’m obviously not gonna leave them out.

Red Sonja (illustration by Donato GIancola), famed badass of Sword-and-Sorcery. She’s maybe the most famous by far pulp heroine of them all, the only one of these for sure that you could reasonably expect most people to at least know by name or imagery. And she is a 1970s Marvel Comics character who borrows her name from an unrelated character in a non-Conan Robert E. Howard story and her characterization from C.L. Moore’s Jirel of Joiry (1934). Another character we can add to the ever-growing pile of “characters who define the term pulp hero despite never actually appearing in pulp fiction” next to The Spirit, Buck Rogers, The Phantom, The Green Hornet, etc.

Sheena, Queen of the Jungle: Here also standing for the general popularity of Jungle Girls in general who usually take after her in some ways or inspired her in the first place they all just kinda blend together at some point

Barbarella: (no idea what archetype taxonomy I could use for her). You all know or have heard of her at some point and she gets grouped with these characters so often I couldn’t really omit her either. I’ve never seen the movie but I know it is an Italian production based on an erotic French comic that shoots for an American comic book style, and that strangeness is part of what made it fairly memorable. I’ve read a couple of Tales of the Shadowmen collections that feature stories with her as well.

Having named these, I’m also going to name six other pulp heroines who do not follow that mold so strongly and don’t overlap with these, and who were popular and significant in different ways:

Hunterwali: Hunterwali is one of the most significant action heroines in film history, as she was the premier starring role for Fearless Nadia, the most iconic action hero of 1930s Indian cinema and the archetypal action actress for Indian films, really one of the earliest and most significant action movie actresses period. Inspired by the Douglas Fairbanks Robin Hood serials, Hunterwali (1935) was a record-breaking blockbuster, with the character said to be “the most popular character of its time” and listed as "Bollywood's best loved character" in 100 years of Indian cinema by CNN-IBN”.

The character is a swashbuckling princess who dons the guise of Hunterwali, "protector of the poor and punisher of evildoers", to become a swashbuckling Masked Avenger bent on rescuing her father and beat up the evil prime minister villain. She runs around on horseback performing stunts like jumping over moving carriages, jumping a horse from a bridge onto the top of a moving train, and defeating 20 soldiers in one sweep with her whip (Fearless Nadia did her own stunts, mind you).

Brigitte “Baby” Montfort: Brigitte Montfort was a highly popular Secret Agent pulp fiction character in Brazil, probably the most straightforward “pulp hero” we have as the star of cheaply printed pocket edition books that arose in the 60s as an alternative to the paperbacks. Brigitte is the daughter of a 1940s feuilleton character (yes, the feuilletons were published here as well) named Giselle Montfort, a Mata Hari-esque spy who bedded Nazis for intel and was eventually killed via firing squad. Brigitte was a globetrotting reporter who secretly operated as a cunning, cutthroat CIA agent, a bikini-clad James Bond. The stories went so in-depth that it was a common rumor at the time that they were written by a CIA agent employed by the editors, and Brigitte lasted about 30 years with circa 500 novels to her name, making her one of the most long-lived pulp characters.

Ethel King: Ethel King was a rare, prototypical Great Detective who debuted in German dime novels and was subsequently published all over Europe for the following two decades. Driven to fight crime by the loss of her father and fiance, she was referred to as “the female Sherlock Holmes” as well as “the female Nick Carter” for French and Italian publishing, and she takes after the two of them in a way.

Like Holmes, she employs brilliant reasoning and goes around with a wisecracking assistant (in this case her governess), and like Carter, she’s also assisted by a younger sidekick (an orphaned cousin she raised on her own), she gets into gunfights and has a tough attitude, and she deals with a massive Rogues Gallery of horrid villains with wild names and even wilder characters (including three evil doppelgangers). She would go on to become a formative influence not just on future female detectives, but also the German hefteromanes that spun out of the dime novels.

Nila Rand: Perfume, pistols and mystery in one package, she was created by Hedwig Langer under a pseudonym, one of the only two characters in this list created by a woman. Nila Rand was a thrill-seeking adventurer Femme Fatale featured in Scarlet Adventuress who dabbled in arms dealing, smuggling of stolen goods and gunfighting.

"She did not know which intrigued her the more, the alluring promise of exotic love, or the threat of terrible and violent death. The last was as necessary to her as the first. Nila Rand had played too long for high stakes and it needed the element of danger to make the game a thrilling one." - The Shanghai Stakes (1935)

Nila is a key example of what separates the femme fatale in the pulps from the films (far more frequently protagonists, rarely the sidekicks or girlfriends but instead solo operatives or leaders of their own gangs, rarely deliver on actual sex and instead manipulate men's desires to their advantage), but far more important than that is the fact that she was openly acknowledged to be bisexual, which goes without saying was extremely rare in any form to find in the pulps in any form.

Even in these spicy/erotic pulp magazines that were all about sneaking stuff past the radar (and thus a place where, for better or worse, writers could play around with topics other magazines would shy away from and would be unthinkable outside of pulp magazines). Finding a queer pulp hero from any period prior to the 1970s, let alone a protagonist and not an outright villain, is bordering on impossible, but it exists and here she is.

Lu Siniang: A lot of Wuxia/Nuxia storytelling is born from similar undercurrents of working class escapism and anger and desire for justice that led to many of pulp fiction’s most prominent heroes, and Lu Siniang is a particularly powerful embodiment of that. She was spun out of real life circumstances involving the execution of Lu Liuliang and his entire family for “literary crimes” against the Qing government, and the subsequent death of the Yongzheng Emperor, and said to be Liuliang’s daughter who had managed to survive away, learn martial arts and join/form a group of revolutionaries in a mission of revenge that culminated in her skewering/beheading the emperor. No Wuxia/Nuxia protagonist had dared to go that far before.

The story was reprinted several times following it’s inception, becoming particularly popular in the 1910s-1940s as the character would star in the Lu Siniang / Fourth Madam Lu serials starting in 1940, that comprised the first Chinese film franchise and film series about a fictional character, as well as one of the first action film series focused on a female protagonist alongside Hunterwali mentioned above.

Pussy Fane: The only other character in the list created by a woman. She was created by prolific romance writer and editor Jane Littel, who was repeteadly stressed to be the "longtime companion" of another pulp romance writer Margaret Wallace (one of the pseudonyms Margaret wrote under was called "Margaret Littell", make of that what you will), with Pussy Fane being a short-lived attempt to combine crime and romance.

Pussy Fane is a Proto-Superhero from 1931, a beautiful escort/party girl who grew up in the circus among jungle cats and is forced to deal with blackmailers and gangsters. She regularly douses herself in perfume to mask their scent, and is burdened with regret and sorrow over her upbringing and nature, repeteadly hearing others refer to her as inhuman and more than half cat. She is also superhumanly strong and athletic, said to have the strength of 20 men, and she also regularly rips off the arms of would-be-rapists.

Yes, it’s a tragedy you’re only just now hearing about this character, it’s a damn shame the stinky classy-yet-feral woman who runs around ripping off the arms of grubby rapist gangsters missed her call in pop culture stardom as did so many of these.

So here there are, 12 female pulp heroes all encompassing different archetypes, as well as different genres and countries of origin. There are more, yes. They are difficult to find enough info to write about, yes. Is the effort worth it? You bet. I find it imperative to shout to the world that these characters and others like them existed, that plenty of them were popular and acclaimed in their own right, even in ways that overshadow the American characters and defy our pop culture preconceptions of what pulp female characters all have to look like.

There was no archetype or type of story available to pulp heroes that was closed off to the women, not now, not a hundred years ago when Ethel King established new paradigms for the Great Detective and dime novel fiction before Hunterwali made action film history doing everything Douglas Fairbanks was doing and then some, not even well over a hundred years ago when Lu Siniang was beating The Count of Monte Cristo and all the ensuing dramatic masked avengers to the punch in backstory and over-the-top revenge. We only stand to lose confining these to the dustbins of history and standing by such a shallow perception of what could be done, and what was done, back then with pulp heroines.

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selenacosmic · 2 years

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Hiya! Absolutely love ur blog. Could I request a MC with super strong and weird pregnancy cravings?? With Masamune, Nobunaga, Kenshin, Hideyoshi, and Shingen? Thanks, love!! Ofc, if you don’t wanna do the request do not feel pressured to at ALL. Hope ur having a good day (or night lol)!

Hello! I feel flattered that I like my blog! Thank you for requesting!

MC with weird pregnancy cravings.

Oda forces.

Nobunaga Oda.

Ever since you confirmed that you were pregnant, he felt an immense amount of joy, he was ready to take care of you in your times of need. Pregnancy was a bit dangerous during that time, but he would make sure to protect you and their baby. But on the other side… there was those strange craving of yours.

He had heard from his vassals that it was common for women to suddenly crave food that they normally wouldn’t eat, but on your case? It was a bit too… extreme.

“My love… must you really mix the Konpeito with the soup?” He knew that the candy wouldn’t have the same flavor after being mixed in there.

“Hm? Of course! It actually tastes delicious! You should try mixing sweets with sour food!” You may say that with a smile, but Nobunaga knew that wasn’t true. He would still oblige to any strange dish you asked from him.

Hideyoshi Toyotomi.

He was… worried. He would do anything for you, but on contrast to Nobunaga, he would seriously question if those cravings were healthy to you. Some of those mixtures were bound to make you sick, what if affected the baby too? The first time you requested, he was wide eyed, looking at you in shock.

“I am sorry, my love… what is it that you want to eat for lunch today…”

“I want to eat Mitsuhide’s food! I have been wanting to eat it again.” He thought only a crazy person or someone who couldn’t taste anything would ask for that, it made him even more worried compared to before. Mitsuhide would be smirking, as he had a way to tease Hideyoshi in a new way.

Masamune Date.

He is a chef himself, the best there is! His food will always taste delicious, regardless of what he made. Which is why he promised you that he would cook only the most delicious food for you in your pregnancy, he knew that you would need to eat more because of the baby. But… he didn’t know what a nightmare it would be.

It was already horrible to watch as Mitsuhide mixes the food he makes all together into one, big ball of food. But you? He wondered what made you do the same?

“Wait, why are you doing that? You should enjoy everything one at a time.” He was shocked, his only eye almost popping out.

“But it all tastes so good when you mix it?”

It was worst when you would request for specific dishes, you would come up with them yourself… and he would make it, but with a tear in his eye.

Uesugi-takeda alliance.

Kenshin Uesugi.

He doesn’t have much knowledge on the woman’s body, he was still learning it. So he had no previous knowledge about pregnancy, he only got a few tips from his vassals (and some from shingen too). He didn’t expect much would happen during your pregnancy, but he was in for a surprise.

He loved sour things, but hated sweets. However, he wouldn’t decline your request for sweets. What he didn’t expect was how you were eating it…

You were shoving both sweets and his favorite pickled plums together, it was a sight that he didn’t know would horrify him.

“MC… are you sure you must eat them like that”

“Yes! I am in love with this mixture!” He was frozen, perhaps broken from seeing his favorite dish being eaten with his most hated one. He wouldn’t stop you though.

Shingen Takeda

Let’s just say that your pregnancy would be filled with pampering, he would give you everything you asked for, practically spoil you completely. He was much more knowledgeable when it came to what would happen to you, so he was half prepared to what would happen. Only half prepared, though.

He would naturally give you any weird food you would request, but he would sometimes frown depending on how weird your craving was. He worried that you would get sick, because he knew he would get sick at some of those mixtures.

It was a similar case to kenshin, except shingen would try to persuade you to eat something else.

“My dear goddess… I don’t think it will be good to mix the sweets with those sour things. You should appreciate the sweets on their own.” He was trying his best to change your mind.

“No, I want both. You aren’t going to deny me… are you?.” In the end he really couldn’t deny you, but he had to turn away, otherwise he would faint(that was pretty dramatic, but it would be similar to that).

#ikemen sengoku #ikesen #ikesen shingen #ikemen sengoku shingen #ikesen kenshin #ikemen sengoku kenshin #ikemen sengoku masamune #ikesen masamune #ikemen sengoku nobunaga #ikesen nobunaga #ikemen sengoku hideyoshi #ikesen hideyoshi

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nyazhis-jsablr · 1 year

Text

Behold, a pinned post!

Welcome to my JSAB Blog!

My main blog is @nyazhi, so check that out if you haven’t!

Read the rest for the Pinned Post!

Here’s some additional tags for stuff I’m posting on here!

#jsab h*i - A tag dedicated to my JSAB AU “JSAB: HARDCORE*INVASION”

#jsab headcanons - A tag dedicated to random HEADCANON dumps I put on here

#jsab tjst - interactive story/comic thingy im doing for fun

I dunno what else to put on here, so I’ll just get to the Askblog stuff

ASKBLOG INFO

In the askblog, you could ask my versions of the characters anything! And here they are!

Cyan - Cyan’s the impromptu leader of the Main 4. He acts like a confident and well-meaninged hero, despite being hotheaded and a bit too overconfident.

Gold - Gold is the Main 4’s “slacker.” They’re quite lazy, but they do get the job done eventually. They’re also the most laid back of the four. Strangely, they’re the most capable of neutralizing corrupted energy of the Main 4, and is often asked to.

Lime - Lime is the Main 4’s most straight-headed person. He’s pretty protective, and often plays defensively. He’s often assigned as the caretaker of the group when Cube’s not around.

Orange - Orange is the smartest among the Main 4. She’s the most outgoing and friendly out of the four, always trying to friends. She thinks up most of the strategies the group uses.

Boss/Blixer (Pre-Story) - The boss is the man behind the corruption himself. He barely takes any crass from anyone, acts serious almost always, and has a quick temper. He dislike the others, mostly because they’re his enemies, but also because their personalities often piss him off.

Boss/Blixer (King/New Game Version) - In an ironic twist, the boss who once hated the wacky personalities of the other characters, now became insane himself as a side effect for consuming so much power. He’s pretty much an insane villain who wants death, destruction, corruption, and to flex his guitar.

Cube - Cube’s the oldest out of all the characters (except for Blixer), but is also the most shy. They’re very bad socially, and often couldn’t converse in conversation without another person with them.

I also got a bunch of JSAB ocs/fcs you could ask, and here they are!

TTF/Time to Fight - TTF is one of Blixer’s most loyal servants. He’s a mercenary hell-bent on capturing/killing the Main 4 shapes. He’s often pretty reckless and overconfident, sorta like Cyan. He has a mouth of a sailor, often swearing every sentence.

Happycore - Happycore is one of the cheeriest and friendliest characters in Paradise. They’re so cheery that they don’t even know if they’re corrupted or not, and act literally the same.

Now here’s some rules!

Rule 1 - Don’t be weird/inappropriate please

Rule 2 - Requests and dares are allowed

Rule 3 - Don’t ask the same questions

Rule 4 - OCs are allowed, but only sometimes

Rule 5 - Please specify which character you’re asking (and in Boss man’s case, specify which version)

Anyways, you’ve reach the end of the pinned post, seeya!

#jsab #just shapes and beats #jsab askblog #jsab player #jsab cyan #jsab au #jsab blixer #jsab boss #jsab cube #nyazhis jsabasks #jsab h*i #jsab headcanons #the jsab story thing

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sergeifyodorov · 7 months

Note

I just reread strange trails and I'd love to know your inspirations for it! Your ideas behind the worldbuilding, the genesis of the plot, all that good stuff if you'd like to share!

the backstory

im a college student and was unemployed all summer. in order to pass the time while waiting for local jobs to reject me i started a crochet project. throughout pretty much the entire month of june. and possibly also may. i would make my squares and listen to the strange trails album. straight through. every day. i may have gone a little bit insane.

but it's okay. i'm already insane.

lord huron (the band who made the album) has like. lore. am i familiar with this lore? no i am not. am i aware nonetheless that there is lore? yes absolutely. if you listen to their discography there's definitely lore -- recurring themes (resurrection, adventuring, magical seductive women, etc), motifs (depends on the album but strange trails is big on flowers, trees, snow, although there is one song that's set in the desert), characters (they keep mentioning a guy called the world ender.) anyHway the point of all of this is that the music is [solid 7.5 out of 10 but it scratches my exact brain itches] and very evocative of the imagery and idea of a deeper world. my favourite off the album (and one of my favourites in the discography) is la belle fleur sauvage, which tells the listener about a long perilous quest for some mythical thing (a flower. also a woman. metaphor), although one of the ones whose imagery i enjoyed the most is frozen pines, which is a little less concrete but invokes images of cold, the side of a mountain, strange happenings, etc.

the idea

those songs are definitely the most direct inspiration for it but unfortunately my process for developing ideas is kind of terrible because it involves less "sitting down and coming up with stuff" and more "wait for a 60% formed idea to smack you upside the head like rapunzel in tangled and her cast-iron frying pan." which quinn and his sad little corpse did.

if you go back far enough in the quinnfic tag on my blog u can see the post right after it Happened. the idea was literally "quinn hughes carries a corpse up a mountain, and horror."

so i take this little piece of grit from which my pearl of questionable moral integrity will be built and i ask it questions. first off: quinn, why are you on that mountain? who is the corpse? is anyone else with you? soon enough petey decided to join him (although quinn is and was always the protagonist/pov character). the body was The Ghost Of Vancouver before it was brock over top of that.

another inspiration, which i realize i'm leaving out, is this

this is artist grayson perry's work "hold your beliefs lightly" from tomb of the unknown craftsman, and this image of a long perilous upward journey towards some sacred place really combined together with la belle fleur sauvage to form the base idea of the world for the work.

and of course why would you carry a corpse up a mountain to some sacred place if you couldn't resurrect it at the end?

quinn

im big on metaphor. if i'm writing something long it has to have a Point to it, some larger theme than romance and stuff (this is mostly because i'm bad at writing romance)(and also big on curses and the like.) and also because quinn hughes asexual barb i never fucked/i never fucked/all my life man, fucks sake. this was also being written right before the peak of Canucks Captaincy Debate, and in our hearts didn't we all know quinn was going to be the one to wear the c?

so it became pretty clear pretty quick that as well as my attempt at writing horror that this was going to be a quinn character study -- and this is where i should talk about my other fic scheherazade.

in scheherazade, auston actually doesn't make a lot of choices -- he tags along, arguing with the narrator/bill, and only starts to take an active role in the way the story is going near the end, when he finally gets sick of it all. quinn, however, is not at all the same kind of person as auston. he's less artistic and more practical; an older brother instead of a younger one; jewish; not nearly so squeamish. he takes an active role in the story from the very beginning, showing up to the base of the mountain with his pack full, both prepared and not for what lies ahead.

the mountain

vancouver is smack in the middle of the north shore mountains, so there's a million hiking trails about, but the one i can most easily think of (as someone who hasn't been to vancouver in several years) is the grouse grind trail, a popular and fairly short trail that the canucks prospects actually do every year, so i knew quinn and petey (both vancouver draftees) would be familiar. i've never actually done the grouse grind, which was part of the reason i decided to kind of. toy with reality. you can't call me out on inaccuracy when it's Not Real On Purpose (although the sign at the 1/4 mark is copied directly from photos i've seen.)

petey and the plot

once i added petey, i knew i'd have to get rid of him -- a lot of the scene ideas were quinn-only, and petey's way too sarcastic and useless (AFFECTIONATE) to engage seriously with the ideas presented to him like quinn would and did. so i needed to divide them up.

the original plot idea from the outline is actually pretty similar up until the end of chapter 6 (the conversation w the ghost), but it differs in a few crucial ways -- one, quinn breaks down again, crying and everything, and two, he actually does go through with the resurrection instead of using his wish to get petey down the mountain safely. i realized around then that this wouldn't work with the quinn i'd created, especially after his argument with the ghost: he's far less focused on glory than stability, less interested in the cup or his contract and more interested in the safe long bet than high rolling. in a cold, wet environment like the mountain it's a lot easier to get hypothermia without noticing than it is in a dry environment, even if the dry environment is several degrees colder than the wet one. and quinn would know that, having seen petey's thin little sweater and knowing his stubborn ass is going to freeze.

so after that it became about hypothermia. i actually had a bit of a writing pause after this because i knew i was going off-outline, so i had to kind of inch ahead until i knew where i was going. but i'm happy with how it turned out!

#asks #quinnfic #hope this satisfies ur curiosity anon!

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