Tumgik
#josh kiszka fanfic
streamingcolors-gvf · 4 months
Text
Skin Deep - Part 10.3
Tumblr media
Pairing: Josh Kiszka x f!freader x male OC, f!reader x Jake Kiszka
Word Count: 9.4k
***A/N: After a bit of a hiatus from the app and writing, this chapter has been a long time coming. It’s been hanging in my docs for quite a while, but I’m stoked to have it finally posted for everyone. This part might be a bit polarizing and intense for some readers, so I strongly encourage you read the warnings before diving right in. I’m quite nervous about this update***
As always, I appreciate all the love, support and feedback y’all give me ❤️
Warnings: cursing, brief mentions of marijuana use and alcohol consumption, angst/toxic themes and behavior (jealousy, extreme anger, allusions to cheating, and manipulation), physical aggression, sexually explicit content - MINORS DNI 18+ (unprotected penetrative sex, rough sex, degradation, dacryphilia - arousal from tears or sobbing, spit kink, spanking, mentions of blood, choking if you squint a lot, and please feel free to message me if I have missed anything on this list!)
Masterpost, Part 10.2
Tumblr media
You must’ve fallen asleep the second you closed your eyes because the next thing you feel is a hand nudging your arm, waking you up. You go to stretch out the tightness locking your tired muscles, but the weight of Josh passed out on your chest keeps you pinned to the bed. 
You try to rub the sleepy glaze from your eyes with the heels of your palms, mumbling, “Hmm…what?”
Kai stands, causing the mattress to bounce and creak with the loss of weight. “I need a shower,” He whispers. “Will you take one with me?”
“Sure,” you groan through the stiffness. It takes a little coaxing, but you still manage to slide out from under Josh without waking him. By the time you can swing your bare feet onto the hardwood floor, Kai has already walked out of the room. 
You stumble your way into the bathroom, wincing at the bright lighting. “I gotta pee…” you trail off, walking past him, but when he doesn’t take the hint, you turn to give him a look. 
He lets out an airy laugh and starts to rummage through the vanity drawers. “Oh, kitten…you act like I wasn’t just inside you an hour ago.” He turns his head to you, emphasizing the remark with a teasing wink. “And you wouldn’t believe the money I’ve made off of women pissing on me… So yeah, that’s kind of the least of my worries, wouldn’t you think?” You grimace in disgust, causing him to flash a grin at you before continuing his search, unbothered by you completely. He then asks over his shoulder, “You’re on birth control, right?”
You push out a heavy sigh into your hands as you settle onto the toilet seat, “Yes, Kai. I am sleeping with both of them, remember?”
He huffs, finally finding what he’s looking for — a spare, cheap toothbrush from the bottom drawer, and starts ripping open the packaging and points it at you. “Which reminds me, I should stop by the clinic this week.” While you’re sure it’s only teasing, you shoot a death glare at him anyway, making him chuckle.   
“I’m kidding! Kind of…” He trails off as he pipes out a line of toothpaste across the pristine bristles. “But in all seriousness, what’s up with you and Jake anyway?”
You scoff, “What’s up with you and Jake?”
“I asked first,” he mumbles around the head of the toothbrush tucked inside his cheek.
You remain glued to the toilet seat, pondering over the question in silence as he continues brushing his perfect teeth. A part of you is hopeful that he'll drop the topic altogether, but the curious raise of his brows says otherwise. You wish you knew the right answer — the perfect explanation for what you were. In reality, you don’t have a clue of what the label would be. You haven’t created the space for it in your life yet. “Fine,” you sigh. “I honestly don’t know what’s up with us. Weeks ago I got a tattoo done by him and by the end of that night, I ended up fucking both of them.”
A few seconds pass, making you look up to see Kai’s eyes widen in the mirror until he breaks away to stare at you. 
You laugh nervously, “I know. It’s kind of crazy to think about, but it’s been going on like that — with both of them since then.”
He spits a mouthful of toothpaste into the sink before following up. “Are you guys like…dating?”
The question takes you back, but you can’t say you didn’t see it coming. “I don’t think so. Not like…conventionally in any way.” Saying the words not only to yourself but in front of Kai fills you with a sense of dread and growing shame. You can’t hide behind your ignorance or delusions. Not being able to hold eye contact, your focus drops to your hands as you anxiously pick at your nail beds. “He always gives me mixed signals and I never know what he’s thinking most of the time. When I feel like I get close, he kind of shuts me out almost. Sometimes I get the feeling like we’re a couple…and then sometimes it’s like I’m just a friend with benefits to him.” Your head falls, and finally spit out the fear that's been lingering in the back of your throat. “…I think he’s been sleeping with other girls though.”
He huffs a dry laugh, missing the shift in your tone, “That’s Jake for you.” It was a poor attempt at bringing some levity back, but when he realizes that is failing, sincerity washes over his sharp features. “I’m sorry, kitten.”
Your voice breaks when you ask, “Is that really how he is?”
He shrugs, taking another washcloth from the stack to wipe the corners of his mouth. “He’s always been closed off and to himself, but I can’t say he’ll be opening up to me any time soon.”
You finally get up to turn on the shower, “Yeah, I guess. But what’s the deal with you and him? Why does he hate you so much?”
Kai watches you work the handles to find the right temperature before stepping in. He winces, sucking in a breath through his teeth. “Oh…well. I’m pretty sure he hates me because I may or may not have unknowingly slept with his ex.”
That wasn’t the answer you were expecting from him. It stuns you, taking you by surprise as warm water sprays over you. “You what?!”
He shushes you dramatically with a finger to his lips as he follows you inside the shower. “Let me explain,” he starts with a weak laugh, but the smile accompanying it doesn’t reach his eyes. “So at the time, his girl, Roxi, was at this random house party that I went to. She approached me that night and we hit it off, but she somehow conveniently skipped around divulging the fact that she was with, or had very recently broken up with him. One thing led to another —yada, yada, yada— we ended up hooking up that night. The next morning I woke up to a frightening amount of angry and wildly alarming texts and voicemails from Jake. Come to find out, someone saw us together and had told him. To me, she was a hot girl that wanted to have some fun. But to him, I ruined his fucking world and he hasn’t forgiven me since.”
Your mouth drops open but you don’t bother catching it. You stand before him, blindsided by the bombshell dropped in your hands. “Oh my god. You didn’t know?”
He shrugs, reaching for Jake’s shampoo bottle off the tile ledge. “No, I had no clue. I know you’ve never met her, but if you do, you will see that she has a certain way about her.” He chuckles, but it sounds more like a warning. “I should’ve known it was a bad decision from the jump, but c’est la vie I guess.”
Processing everything he has just told you proves to be a nearly impossible feat, but it’s able to bring some clarity to his behavior while leaving you wanting more. “Does Jake know that you didn’t know?”
He scoffs at the notion, “You honestly think Jake gives a fuck about that? He probably assumes I have some fucked up motive to steal you away from him too. Which I can’t say I blame him for.” He pauses, massaging the high-end shampoo into a rich lather through his raven-black locks.  “So it’s looking like I don’t know how to learn my lesson…but where’s the fun in that?”
You reach for the same bottle, throwing him a disappointed glare. “No wonder he’s so pissed at me. I’m such an asshole, Kai.” 
He places his soapy hands on your shoulders, grounding you to him and reassuring you with an affectionate touch. “And how were you supposed to know that, hmm? His hatred for me goes way back… way before you ever came into the picture, trust me.”
He’s trying. You’ll give him that, but the words don’t help ease the guilt you’re feeling. “I certainly didn’t make it better. He’s going to be so upset.”
Kai’s fingers knead away the tightness in your neck. He’s trying to distract you now, and you don’t fight him on it. “I can hold my own and so can he.”
“Does Josh know?”
He hesitates, even if it’s only for a few seconds.“Yeah, but he kind of went Switzerland on the whole thing. He stuck his head down and minded his business, which was probably for the best. Josh learned early on not to insert himself between Roxi and Jake.” 
You try not to let the truth leave a stain on your evening, but it bleeds through regardless.“Why didn’t he say anything to me about her?”
“Probably didn’t think she was important enough to.” Kai isn’t oblivious to how this is affecting you either. He closes the remaining distance between you, tipping your chin up with a careful nudge of his finger, drawing your drifting attention back to him. His piercing green eyes appear darker than before — softer even. The game you found yourselves in has ended, and the intentions behind them have shifted, making you feel comfortable in his embrace. “Listen, don’t let this shit get in the way. If Jake is out here holding grudges, that’s on him.”
You look up and stare into his haunting irises,  muttering, “Okay…yeah. You’re right.” 
Just as you take in his details —the fans of dark lashes framing his eyes, the water rolling off the bridge of his nose, the heavy droplets falling from the ends of his hair— he studies yours.  “You love him, don’t you?”
“H-Huh? What?”
“Josh.” A smirk plays on his lips just as his fingers snake up your neck and skate across your scalp. “I can see it in your eyes when you look at him.”
Him calling you out like that flusters you, and you begin to stammer over yourself. His expression softens at the sight of your anxiety, and he leans in to place a gentle kiss on your open lips. 
It’s chaste and sweet, verging on platonic rather than sexual. “Relax, kitten. I get it. Your secret is safe with me.”
You think of him sleeping peacefully stretched across his bed. You’re blushing, still high of the euphoria and weed from earlier. You've been convincing yourself that it’s puppy love, or at least textbook infatuation, so you take his observation with a grain of salt. Deciding to change the subject, you ask with a quirked brow,  “So what if I met you first?”
His facial expression shows he’s a little surprised by your question, but doesn’t stumble over it for long. “If you met me first? …Well, I would have wooed like I did tonight.” He grins, pausing to capture your lips in another kiss, one that lingers this time. “Fucked your pretty brains out for a few weeks and string you along before slowly distancing myself. Probably tell you that I’m not looking for anything serious because I’m horrendously emotionally unavailable.”
You huff a tired laugh, rolling your eyes before dipping your head under the stream of water. “At least you’re honest.”
“Always.”
Sadness starts to settle when you realize how fleeting this is with him, weighing down on your heart. “So what’s gonna happen tomorrow?”
He hums, mirroring a similar feeling. It pulls his lips into a frown before he hides it with a shallow smile. “We’ll wake up a little hungover, maybe have some more fun. Then we’ll have breakfast and say our goodbyes and I’ll keep being his friend just the same as I did before.”
Your eyes fall from his as you nod along to the rose and fall of his voice. You’re starting to grow attached, and trying your best not to let the reality of this being the last time you’ll see him upset you. 
“Hey, stay with me, okay?”
Your shoulders fall but you mask your emotions with a brave face.“Okay.”
“He feels the same way you do, you know?”
“I dunno about that. You both seem pretty similar in that regard.”
“I’m serious. I can tell. Even if he’s totally being “Josh” about his feelings. I know him well enough to know that they’re there.”
Tumblr media
You startle awake. flying into a sitting position to find that you’re alone in Josh’s bed. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you guess it's late morning with how bright the sunlight is shining through the blinds. Worried that you’ve slept too long, you scramble across the mattress to snatch your phone from the nightstand.
10:37 
You hear voices coming from the kitchen, and even through the bedroom walls, you can tell it’s Josh and Kai. You slide off the bed, shuffle over to the dresser, and pull out a band tee from the drawer before stepping out of the room. 
“So you like this girl, huh?” Kai asks. It makes you stop in the middle of the hallway and your heart begins to race. You inch closer, stepping quietly enough not to be detected.
You hear Josh let out a slow, deep sigh, “Yeah. I like her a lot.” 
Your chest cinches a few notches tighter, sending your heart up into the back of your throat. A part of you feels terrible for eavesdropping on a private conversation, but your curiosity keeps your feet planted on the floor. 
“Are you just fucking or is there more to this one?”
You stop breathing, bracing yourself for his honesty. Despite what Kai had told you hours ago, you had your doubts about his true feelings.
“I like to think there’s more than just sex. Fuck, Kai. I think about her all the time. I just want to spend every moment of the day with her. Every day. I don’t know what to do with myself anymore. I’ve never been this crazy about anyone before…which fucking scares the shit out of me. And you know me.” 
“I do. And she’s got feelings for Jake?”
“Probably. Every time I feel like we’re getting a little bit closer, she pulls away and runs to him.”
There’s a pause before Kai hums to himself. “Do you think he has feelings for her?”
“Maybe? It’s hard to tell with him sometimes.”
“Has he dated anyone since her?”
“Roxi?” He pauses for a few seconds. “No, not really. He’s slept with a few, but none of them hung around long enough for me to remember their name.”
“He’s really still holding a grudge about that, huh?”
“Have you met Jake?” Josh snorts a laugh.
“Do you think he’s still hung up on her?”
“For a moment I thought he wasn’t, but sometimes I just don’t know. They were together for five years, Kai.”
Five years. 
“Fuck.” Kai seems to share the same thought. “She certainly didn’t act like it.”
Josh lets out a light chuckle, sounding like he’s moving farther away from you. “She never did. But hey, I’m just glad she’s finally out of his life. Last I heard she was living with some tattoo artist guy in Vegas.”
“…You ever?”
“Fuck no! Are you kidding me?!” Josh scoffs, nearly wrenching at the thought. “Besides the obvious fact that he would’ve murdered me in my sleep, there was a higher chance of her Lorena Bobbit’ing my ass than me having any semblance of a good time.”
Kai laughs, causing his cackle to echo throughout the house. “The crazier the better in my opinion.”
“You would say that.” Josh’s voice and his footsteps grow distant from you, making it sound as though he’s making his way toward the kitchen.
“Sounds like you got quite the mess to sort through.”
“Yeah, I know. I’m just worried about it. I did tell her that I would be okay if she wanted to only be with him though.”
Hearing him say those feelings out loud to Kai brings you back to that moment in the car and the guilt you felt, how you both reassured each other the best way you knew how. 
“Do you honestly believe that you would?”
“I’d have to be, right?” The disappointment and sadness in his voice is palpable. 
“Do you think she would do that?”
“I don’t know…” You fight the urge to rush in there and reassure him in some way. 
Kai sighs, pausing for a minute before speaking, “I don’t know about what’s going with Jake, but she fucking adores you, Josh. It’s not much coming from me because I don’t get all lovey-dovey and shit, but I see it. The way she looks at you, she cares about you. That much I do know.”
“Fuck. I dunno…maybe you’re right. I get the feeling she’s holding back something from me…” he trails off. “What about you? Do you adore me, Kai?”
“I always will, pretty boy. If there’s a day that you’re single and I’m finally ready to settle down, You’ll be the one I’ll call.”
“Oh, I’m so flattered,” Josh giggles.
“Shut the fuck up. You know I’m a mess and a walking red flag. You’re too good for me anyway.”
“What can I say? I’m drawn to toxic like a moth to a flame, baby.”
“No, that’s your fucking twin.”
You decide it’s time to make your presence known and walk into the living room. They are both leaning against opposite ends of the kitchen counter when Josh hears you enter. You make your way across the room, catching a knowing look from Kai — one that you’ll choose to ignore for now. Josh perks up, giving you that beaming smile of his. “Hey, baby. How’d you sleep?”
Once you’re close enough, he sets his coffee mug down and pulls you in for a warm embrace, an action so domestic it makes your heart flutter. Knowing what you heard moments ago threatens to overwhelm you, but you try your best to keep yourself calm. You hold his slender waist, giving him a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. “Pretty good. Didn’t like waking up in an empty bed.”
He frowns as he plays with the hem of your shirt, but it spreads into a grin when he sees that it’s one of his own. Looking down at you with a playful glint in his eye, he bites down at his bottom lip while his hands roam freely up and down your body. “I’m sorry, sweet girl. I just couldn’t bring myself to wake you, and I thought you should sleep in a little longer.” 
He then reaches over and grabs his mug to take another sip. Curious, you tip it down to see what’s inside, asking, “What’s this?”
“Oh! Kai was able to figure out how to use Jake’s ridiculously expensive espresso machine,” he explains, gesturing with the tip of his chin to Kai behind you. “I know we aren’t fancy baristas like you.”
You turn to look at Kai, who is taking a massive bite out of the center of a piece of buttered toast. “You made this?”
Kai nods with a confident smirk, brushing the crumbs off his fingers, and mumbling, “I did. Want one?”
“I would love one,” you reply, pleasantly surprised. While Josh keeps his hands busy massaging your shoulders, you watch Kai start setting up the machine for your shot of espresso. “Don’t you have to be at the shop this morning?”
Josh lets out a whimsical sigh, but it’s obvious he’s less than thrilled. “Sam opened for me, but I gotta head over there at noon.”
The deadbolt of the front door unlocks, throwing you all into a standstill of silence as the ominous clack of boot heels hits the wooden floor. Your eyes glue themselves to the threshold of the living room, waiting for him to step into view. 
Anxiety and guilt send your heart racing into a panic state. You haven’t had the time to pull together a decent explanation to defend yourself. It doesn’t matter, because the second you see him, the words you could’ve prepared would’ve vanished. 
Jake pauses in the entryway, scanning over the scene of the three of you before him. His eyes are covered with a pair of dark wire-rimmed sunglasses that hide his expression from you. You brace for an explosive reaction and fight back the nausea bubbling in the pit of your belly. 
If there were a record playing, the needle would be sent across the vinyl with a theatrical scratch. 
You watch the tightly wound muscles of his jaw clench as he sets his guitar case down on the floor with a heavy thud. His movements are slow, but calculated. There’s no doubt he’s angry. He’s practically seething with disgust. You look over to Josh, desperate for a sense of direction but the worry in his eyes gives you little to no hope.
He removes his sunglasses and hooks them over the collar of his t-shirt, giving you the sight of the tired circles framing his hollow eyes.  “You know, Kai… I thought I made it extremely clear to you that I never wanted to see your face ever again. And yet, you come into my place of business anyway. Which, I let slide because I love my brother. But the fact you’re in my fucking house—“
“I’m not one to turn down an invitation,” Kai interrupts, baiting Jake.   
“Get. Out,” Jake snarls through gritted teeth, letting himself slip. The tension in the room feels like a disease, infecting every inch of your body with each passing second. 
Kai lets the silence stale as his eyes pan across the room, locking on yours for a few seconds longer than they should. “Well, everyone, it seems as though I’ve overstayed my welcome,” he sings with a sleepy lilt, setting down his half-empty coffee mug on the counter. He steps toward Josh at a leisurely pace, pulling him in for an affectionate and gentle kiss to mumble against his lips, “It’s been wonderful. I hope to do this again sometime.” Josh relaxes enough to smile from the touch, but the stiffness returns as soon as Kai separates from him. 
Kai makes his way around the island and leans down to you to place a dramatic kiss on your lips. Knowing that Jake is watching, he makes sure to slip his tongue enough for him to see. He breaks away to breathe you in, humming in satisfaction, “It’s been a true pleasure, kitten.” 
“That’s enough.” Jake’s voice cuts through the air with a razor’s edge. 
Your face flames hot with a feeling of shame. There’s no denying what happened. There’s no backtracking the events of last night in an attempt to smooth things over. Not only has Jake caught you, but you’re rubbing the very idea of it in his face. Keeping his jade-colored eyes locked on yours, Kai straightens upright. The shit-eating grin and the wink he gives you is a tell-all. He’s not intimidated by him in the slightest — it’s all just another play of the game. With the cocky smile fixed on Kai’s face, he turns to face him. “Don’t tell me you’re threatened by me, Jake.”
Exhibiting an unwavering ego, Kai takes confident strides in the face of danger. There’s an unbridled rage tearing at the weakened seams of Jake’s composure, and you’re within seconds of witnessing it. Kai steps between him and the wall, towering over him by those crucial inches. You’ve seen this type of display before — that standoff between Josh and Jake in the tiny office. However, this feels very different to you. This goes beyond petty sibling rivalry. The glimmer in Kai’s eyes tells you he’s nowhere close to laying down and showing his belly for mercy. 
He should just pass by Jake and walk right out that door, but he doesn’t. He gives in to the temptation and decides to toss out a final taunt. “She was a real treat last night.” The way the words slip so effortlessly from his quick-witted tongue leaves a bitterness on yours. “Which isn’t a surprise. I’ve always admired your taste. Although I will say I like her a lot better than Roxi.”
Jake suddenly lunges forward with the same ferocity of a rabid dog, grabbing fistfuls of Kai’s button-up. “Get her name out of your fucking mouth, you piece of shit!” 
Being arguably stronger, roughly forty pounds heavier, and a couple of inches taller, Kai reacts quicker than your brain can process, making it seem as though it’s a frenzied blur of motion. He shoves Jake backward by the scruff of his shirt, throwing him into the opposite wall with enough force to make the picture frames rattle from the impact. Jake’s pinned, having all the air knocked from his chest. As calm as Kai seems to be, you’re not ignorant of the pacified aggression lying just beneath the surface. Through Jake’s grunts, he makes his threat clear as they stare into the darkest corners of their minds through each other’s eyes, “Don’t do anything you’ll regret, Jake.” 
Afraid of the worst, your head snaps back to Josh, silently begging him to do anything to diffuse the situation. Fear has cast over his features as well, leaving you both frozen in place to watch it all unfold in front of your very eyes.  
“Get the fuck off me!” Jake spits, ripping Kai’s hands from his clothing with a frustrated throw of his arms. 
There’s so much more that he wishes to do. He wants to tear Kai to shreds — to throw a well-deserved punch into that chiseled jaw, to break that perfect nose, to leave him bloody and bruised, but he knows that the odds are stacked against him. It’s an unfair fight with far more disadvantages than he wants to admit. This is a match between a man with everything to lose and one wagering absolutely nothing.
While Jake blows the violent plumes of his anger through flared nostrils, Kai irons out the new wrinkles of his shirt with an unbothered pass of his palm. “And with that, I bid you all adieu.” Aware that the stakes are rising by the second, he doesn’t wait for the responses that are stuck in your throat and goes to leave. Before he takes the final step out of the door, he looks over his shoulder. “And Jake? That temper is going to get the best of you one day. Don’t let it get away from you.” 
Jake throws up a middle finger, a gesture to which Kai responds with a dry, humorless laugh before closing the door behind him. Josh hears the door latch into place and steps toward his brother, calling out to him, “Jake—“ 
“Fuck you!” The words shot out of his mouth as a verbal strike — meant only to hurt. He hasn’t bothered looking at you until now, but when those eyes find you, you deeply wish they hadn’t. He glares at you with black, wounded eyes basted in pure, undiluted disappointment. You hate that look. It makes you feel sick and riddled with shame.
He picks up his guitar case, breaking eye contact to shoot Josh a hateful look of his own. He jabs a finger in the air, pointing directly at his brother. “You’re a fucking prick.” 
Josh recoils but doesn’t say another word in defense. Pissed and not wanting to stay another second, Jake takes off down the hall toward the bedrooms. 
You leap off the barstool, sending the chair skidding across the floor as you call after him, “Jake, wait! Let me explain!” 
“Jake!” You bolt down the hall after him, but he doesn’t stop or at the very least, slow down for you. He doesn’t even bother glancing back at you to give you a hateful look. The only thing you’re given in return for your efforts is a slammed door in your face.  You can only stare at the painted wood, contemplating whether you should knock or barge right in. 
He’s shut you out — figuratively and literally. 
Deflated, you walk aimlessly into Josh’s bedroom. Your feet are working separately from your mind, carrying you to his bed. You crawl on top of the disheveled duvet and breathe in the dissipating scent of Kai’s cologne. All you want to do is disappear, to take away the feeling that’s closing the walls of your chest. 
You curl into the fetal position, making yourself as small as you possibly can. Lying there, you have a hard time telling how much time has passed when you hear Josh walking into the room and feel his weight shift across the mattress. 
“Hey,” he says quietly, carefully reaching out to touch the back of your arm to comfort you. Feeling as though you don’t deserve it, you flinch from the gentle contact, shrugging his hand from your body. He sighs, “I know you’re mad at me, baby.” He then clears his throat, but the defeat coats every word like a sickness, “You have every right to be, honestly. I…I probably wasn’t in my right frame of mind last night. I mean don’t regret it… but shit… I wasn’t thinking that clearly either. I saw how the two of you were at the bar and saw the chance. I was so blinded by this fantasy I’ve had to sleep with him that I forgot about your feelings in all this. I didn’t care about Jake either. I knew he would be pissed but I didn’t care.” You can hear how painful the last sentence is to his heart.  “I’m sorry I pulled you into this.”
You stare at the collection of vintage posters on his wall, letting the apology brew in your thoughts as you study the images. You aren’t angry with him. You never were, but you don’t have the energy to correct him on it now. You can’t even say you regret what happened with Kai, but you need answers to the questions assaulting the forefront of your mind. “Tell me about Roxi.”
Some time passes before he cuts through the looming silence. “Ah…shit. I don’t even know where to start with that,” he begins as he stretches across the bed next to you. You listen quietly, keeping your back to him. “I guess they met when they were about twenty or twenty-one. We were all fresh out of our apprenticeships when he started tattooing her and didn’t take long for them to become a thing. A will-they-won’t-they, on-again-off-again thing for five fucking years, babe. One minute they would be the sweetest lovebirds in front of you and then the next they were going at each other’s throats. I don’t want to say it was just her that was the problem, but she put him through a lot of bullshit for a long time.”
You can’t ignore the hints of anger in his voice. “He was in love with her?”
“In love with the idea of her. A version of her that will never, ever exist. I don’t care what anyone says to me about it. That’s what I believe. For years he chased after what he thought she could be. He was so convinced she was ‘the one’  that he bought a ring and everything. But there was no telling him that. It was one of those things you just had to let play out and let him learn for himself.”
You’re not sure why the truth he’s been hiding from you hurts, but it does. You lay silent, repeating Josh’s words over in your mind. 
Josh isn’t oblivious to your broken breathing pattern — how hard you’re holding back from crying. He risks another touch by brushing his fingertips across your back. “Roxi has been out of the picture for a while, baby. Please don’t hold that weight on your shoulders. His issues with Kai don’t have anything to do with you and I, okay?”
“Why didn’t you just tell me?”
He stammers over his words, “I-I don’t know…I was selfish about you. I guess that it was easier to stuff his skeletons back in the closet. Maybe I thought it would be bad to put his business out there like that. Or maybe I thought she was in the past and it didn’t matter anymore.”
“He doesn’t even want to talk to me,” your voice croaks, broken from our hitched breath. “You saw it. He didn’t even want to look at me, Josh.”
He sighs, turning to nuzzle into the nape of your neck while wrapping a loose arm around your midsection.  “He’ll come around, babe. He always does.” It’s hard to believe him, especially from what you heard about Jake holding grudges, 
You feel the vibration of his phone against your ass. He lets out an annoyed groan, shifting to dig it out from his front pocket. “Shit! Today of all fucking days…” His sigh might as well have the weight of the world. He rests his forehead against your back, mumbling into the worn cotton, “I gotta head to the shop. Would you like to stay here or do you want me to drive you home?”
The thought of packing your stuff and leaving to be home by yourself nearly crushes you. You feel embarrassed, but ask anyway, “Is it okay if I just lay here for a while?”
“Of course, baby,” he coos reassuringly, placing a kiss on your cheek before crawling off the bed. He knows you need the space, so he doesn’t push any more affection onto you yet. “Text or call if you need anything.”
“I will.”
Tumblr media
It’s been hours since Josh left for work, and you spent most of that time rotting in the duvet cocoon feeling sorry for yourself. There was a nap or two, but nothing to make you feel well-rested in any sense. If anything, you feel more exhausted, but with dusk finally falling, you’re forced to crack open the door. You hear the ominous sounds of someone shuffling around in the kitchen. The hallway is cast in darkness, but you can see that Jake’s door is open. 
You’re going to have to face him. 
There’s no avoiding it. 
It looks as though he’s cooking dinner, prepping the pile of vegetables stacked on the center of the counter. He’s chopping away but doesn’t lift his head as you step closer. You know he hears you, so you stand on the opposite side of the island and wait for him to finally acknowledge you. 
Even though he’s changed his clothing to a different band t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants, he’s never seemed more uncomfortable. His long hair is tied back in a messy, low bun with loose strands falling around his face. You make the first move to break the silence. “Are we gonna talk or what?”
The muscles of his jaw tighten, but he keeps his lips sealed together in an expressionless, thin line. “Jake, come on,” you prod, your impatience growing with every second he chooses to ignore you. He continues chopping, keeping his focus on the large onion pressed beneath his fingertips. His behavior ignites a flash of anger inside you like a struck match. “Are you seriously giving me the silent treatment right now?!” Nothing. Just the repetitive sound of the blade thumping against the cutting board. “Can you just tell me you’re mad?”
Your incessant pestering distracts him, causing the butcher knife to escape from his stranglehold grasp, cutting his finger which makes him drop the blade and hiss a curse under his breath. Instead of breaking away to tend to the fresh wound, he goes back to chopping the rest of the onion. 
“You’re bleeding, Jake,” you mutter, thinking that he would’ve noticed the trail of blood running down the side of his palm and smearing across the vegetable. “Can you please just look at me? Talk to me.” You don’t care that you’re unwelcome. You won’t leave until you get a reaction out of him. “Just fucking say something. Anything. I know you’re pissed at me. Just tell me I’m fucking horrible. Tell me you hate me. Just say something.”
The fraying line that’s been keeping his composure finally snaps within seconds. He snatches the glass bowl full of diced onions sitting on the counter and hurls it into the wall to your right, screaming with rage as it flies through the air. 
The small bowl shatters on impact, sending an explosion of glass shards and tiny bits of onion everywhere. 
“FUCK!” 
You recoil from the sound and the rise of his voice, staring blankly at the scene before you after being stunned into silence. This is the first real, raw emotion he’s shown you, and you’re not sure what to do with it. Several seconds of silence pass before you can finally breathe, “What the fuck is the matter with you?!”
He’s gripping the edge of the countertop with his head hung low, mumbling, “You just don’t understand.” 
“What don’t I understand?”
He reaches for the crumpled tea towel beside him and wraps it around his bleeding finger, muttering in a low, calculated voice, “Kai is a fucking drifter and a player.” He clenches his fist around the soiled cloth, causing his knuckles to turn a ghostly shade of white. “He goes from one person to the next whenever he gets bored with them. It’s always been about an easy fuck for him. He fucking used you like he does everyone else. Don’t you see that?! He doesn’t care about you, dove.” The muscles tighten over his jaw while his darkened, sunken eyes rise to meet yours, giving you an icy scowl that threatens to make the blood run cold in your veins. “Never has, never will.”
Defensiveness comes as a visceral reaction for you. He’s dead wrong, and the last thing you’re about to do is let him barrel over you to prove it. You firmly stand your ground, spitting back harsh words of your own, “Sounds like someone I know.”
“Excuse me?!” He scoffs, chucking the ruined towel off to the side. That one hurt, and the pained look on his face is one you won’t forget. 
You dig your heels in, throwing your arms in frustration as you double down, “Oh, so you can fuck all the girls you want but it’s suddenly a problem when I sleep with Kai?!”
Your thrown-in confession causes him to flinch, but confusion becomes layered deep within his anger. “Other girls? What the fuck are you talking about?!”
“The girls you’re texting, Jake! The women that pop up on your phone all the time!” You scream out, pointing to his phone resting on the counter. “Don’t think I don’t see it.”
“Wait a minute…Are you talking about my clients?!” He snaps, fraying apart while staying oblivious to the droplets of blood that are about to drip onto the floor. 
“Oh please, Jake,” you huff, rolling your eyes as you cross your arms over your chest, which brings his attention to the fact you’re wearing Josh’s shirt. “Don’t treat me like I’m an idiot. I may be naive, but I’m not that fucking stupid.”
He laughs and inhales deeply, reigning in the anger enough to say the following words slowly, as if to spoon-feed you what he’s about to say, “I’m not fucking anyone else. I don’t know how else to explain that to you.”
A shred of doubt reveals itself. You want to trust him but your wounded pride forces you to mask it by deflecting. “And you really expect me to believe that? I saw how you flirted with those girls in the front row last night.”
His eyes widen in disbelief. “Are you fucking kidding me?! You had your tongue shoved halfway down Kai’s throat!”
“What does it matter?! You acted like I didn’t exist, Jake! That I was a nobody to you. Now you’re trying to pin some kind of blame on me for what happened in the past between you and him. But guess what? I’m not Roxi.”
That flipped a massive switch, and for a split second, you almost regret letting her name leave your mouth. You’ll admit that it was immature of you, but you don’t care. The anger that's been kept at a steady simmer between you boils over into a seething rage, popping and bursting onto anything that stands too close. He points a threatening finger at you, spitting the venom-dipped words, “Don’t you fucking dare act like you know anything about her, because you don’t. But you’re right. I expected you to have higher standards for who you fucked than she did.”
“Well, I slept with you, didn’t I?!” You sneer, throwing his insult back in his face. He becomes unrecognizable from the tears glazing over your tired eyes, pooling at your lashes before they have the chance to spill over. You’re just out to hurt each other now, throwing verbal punches to see who can cause the most damage.
It seems as though you got the last shot in because he doesn’t strike out at you again. There are no smartass remarks for him to come back with. His eyes break away from yours, and his gaze falls to the bloody cutting board resting on the counter in front of him. “This was a fucking mistake.”
Moments ago you were shouting at each other from across the granite countertop, but now the house is deathly quiet after hearing those five words, so quiet that the air becomes too thick for you to breathe. The way his voice cracked ever so slightly makes your heart plummet into the pit of your stomach. You wait, hoping that it’s not what you think it means, or perhaps you’re just anticipating the worst. 
Your voice catches from trying not to cry, “What’s a mistake?” 
This feeling terrifies you. You’ve been betting against the odds this whole time, risking it all on the chance you wouldn’t care for him this way. You’ve been ignorant, determined to convince yourself that you weren’t falling in love. 
Love. 
How could you fall in love with both of them like this?
This should be a euphoric moment for anyone— something to be celebrated and cherished. Most would be confessing it under far different circumstances, instead you’re staring at that same man with hurt welling in his eyes. You run away from it like a coward, forced to bury it deep and shove it away before it has a chance to break you. 
His shoulders fall as if all life has been drained from him. He waves an outstretched hand to nothing in particular, but there’s no life in the movement. “This.”
Uncomfortable silence stales between you, and his eyes flicker up to meet yours. You see his brother’s softness in his face — a vulnerability he makes sure to keep from you. The look paired with the answer he gave crushes you. There’s a real possibility that you could lose him now that you’ve done an expert job of pushing him away. The need to be closer compels you to take a step, and you start to circle your way around the island.  “So this is it then?” 
Your hand follows the hard edge of the counter as you round the corner, sliding across its smooth surface. You grip onto it, using it as the only thing to ground yourself until you’re standing beside him. He doesn’t say a single word, move an inch, or even make an attempt to look at you. If anything, he stiffens from your presence. Feeling like he’s giving up on you, you challenge in a low voice,  “Are you really done because you got jealous?”
“I’m not fucking jealous!” he shouts, slamming his hand down onto the counter through the resurgence of that rage.  You jump back hearing the cutting board rattle beneath his palm, but it doesn’t scare you away. He’s just as scared, breathing heavily, watching you reach a hand out from the corner of his eye. He flinches when you touch his arm, but he doesn’t move away from you. In a weaker, pained voice, he says, “Do you actually think I don’t care about you?” 
“Jake?” You whisper meekly, just barely grazing over his splayed fingers out of sheer desperation to connect with him in some way. Your heart aches when you see him pull his hand from yours, leaving behind a red stain across the wooden board. “Jake, please.”
You step into the heat and scent of his body, bringing yourself inches from him. Your broken pleas are the only thing you can offer, begging your way in despite his rejection to keep you out. He warns with your name pushing past his lips through a tired sigh.
You ignore it. With only a breath between you, you nudge your nose into the side of his neck, brushing your lips across the warm skin so faintly he might question if the feeling is real. He shudders through a harsh swallow but doesn’t push you away. You abandon your morals, kissing his throat with much more intent. A soft groan echoes in his throat as your tongue flicks across him and in the blink of an eye, he snatches your wrist, pulling you back. 
You suck in a sharp breath, startled by his movements. While the hold he has on you isn’t painful, it’s firm, keeping you pinned between him and the island’s granite edge. 
His other hand finds the nape of your neck, and he knots his fingers in your hair, forcing you to look up at him. You watch, dumbfounded as his bloodshot eyes scan over your face until they lock with yours. You accept your vulnerable state, submitting to him without a single word of protest. 
“Oh, dove,” he hums, clicking his tongue. “Look at you…whimpering and crawling your way back to me like this. Do I need to lick your wounds for you, too?” He mocks in that gravelly voice of his, sending the words across your lips, each one bathed in whiskey as if he had recently taken a sip. You know he’s far from drunk, remembering the half-filled rocks glass sitting on the counter. “It’s pathetic. Did he even make you cum? Or did he need Josh’s help for that too?” 
It should piss you off—the way he’s speaking to you like this. If you had any sense or dignity left, you would shove him off you and storm back into Josh’s room to gather your belongings.
Knowing you don’t have a response, he continues, “My sweet, beautiful dove. Is that name even fitting for you anymore? Or are you a cuckoo — tricking your way into my nest pretending to be something you’re not? I trusted you, yet here I am with betrayal finding me once again.”
“I’m sorry,” you squeak out, your strength cracking beneath him.  
“Why should I let you back in? Do you think you’ve earned my forgiveness?” He hisses, his hurt seeping into the hushed sound. You don’t blame him. You’re not even confident that you could convince yourself that you deserve it. Left speechless, you’re only able to look up at him, glassy and doe-eyed with your tears falling freely down your flushed cheeks. 
The sight of you changes something within him. He curses to himself before his lips collide with yours, angry and needy. He ruts himself against you, letting go of your wrist to brace himself on the counter. The kiss is heady— desperate with hunger as if he has been starving for this. He pants your name in a bated breath, confessing, “Don’t you see my weakness for you?”
It makes you throb to hear it. You need him. God, you need him and you don’t care what it’ll cost you. He devours you, licking into your mouth to consume everything he can. The smokey taste of him, the feeling of his dominant tongue running along yours, the nipping of his teeth on your lips. With your hand free, you search across his thigh, quickly finding his erection through his sweatpants. The thin fabric does nothing to hide it, letting you feel how hard he truly is. 
You stroke your fingers over his covered length, but he stops you from dipping them beneath his waistband. Breaking away from the kiss, he warns, “I’m not going to be gentle with you.” 
“I don’t care,” you whine into his mouth, fighting the grasp he has around your arm.
He squeezes your hand, emphasizing again, “I’m serious. I’m not going to be careful, dove.” 
You glare into his eyes, staying in his darkened irises — perhaps to call his bluff or maybe to bait him further. “I want this.” 
“Fine,” he huffs, releasing your hand. He then steps back, flipping you around to face away from him. Before you can react, he places a hand flat between your shoulder blades, pushing you down until your chest is flush with the counter’s surface. You shiver the chill of the stone against your hardening nipples through your shirt. “Is this really what you want?”
You swallow to wet your tongue, answering, “Yes.”
Without another warning, his open palm connects with your ass, cracking against the flesh with a powerful slap. You cry out as the sting radiates, prickling the skin with its heat. 
“I turn my back for one second and I catch you giving your perfect pussy away to him.” His fingertips skim across the raised mark he left, tracing along the edge of your panties before hooking the band and pulling the cotton down your legs. You hear the threads of it rip on the way to the floor, then feel his fingers ghost over your bare cunt. He spits, and you imagine how it looks as he starts stroking himself before pressing the head of his cock to your entrance. “Don’t forget your color.” 
There’s no foreplay to get you ready for him this time because he buries himself inside you in a single powerful thrust. The moan that heaves from your chest is guttural. You welcome the pain of him stretching you out so quickly, groaning as it melts into pleasure when he slowly withdraws. 
He doesn’t allow you to bask in it for long, snapping his hips forward to ram himself back into your cervix. His hand grips around your waist, balling the material of your shirt between his fingers. 
He lives up to his word, fucking you harder than he ever has before. There’s no doubt that this is fueled by his anger or possibly a newfound hatred for you, but you take it all in, biting back your muffled cries. While your teeth create a row of indents into the flesh of your forearm, his fingers dig deeper into your hip. He doesn’t talk you through like he has in the past, giving you the sounds of his ragged breathing instead.
The rhythm he uses is unrelenting. The power behind his thrusts is unprecedented. He’s rough with you, just as he promised, pressing you against the cold, hard granite, left with nothing to brace yourself. You’re lost in it, overwhelmed by the fact that this might be the very last time you have him. 
Fearful that you won’t be able to handle much more, you whimper out, “Jake.”
He suddenly freezes at the sound of his name and takes a minute for the both of you to catch your breath before pulling completely out of you. You panic thinking that it might be over, and plead over your shoulder. “No, don’t stop!”
“Color?”
“Green.”
He waits for a second before spinning you around to lift you onto the countertop. He slips himself back in, and after seeing how much you’ve been crying, tucks the hair stuck to your temple behind your ear and cradles your face to kiss you. 
“Close your eyes for me,” he instructs calmly, effectively shushing you. You clutch onto his shoulders and wrap your legs about the small of his back, locking him inside you as you allow your eyelids to flutter closed. He holds you still, sending the warmth of his fluttering breath until his tongue passes over your cheek in a delicate flick. He licks up the trails of tears across your skin, cleaning the dried salt as he makes his way to your soaked lashes. He’s breaking you apart only to put you back together again. 
A choked sob escapes you, “I’m so sorry, Jake.” 
He groans in response to the sounds of your weeping, biting at your swelling cheek before burying his face in the crook of your neck. He breathes you in, and finds a new pace, gliding into you with a controlled ease. 
“Say it again,” he growls against your ear with a deliberate thrust. “I need to hear you beg for it.”
“I’m sorry,” you whine, but absentmindedly. You’re more than distracted, using most of your focus on the way his cock hits your g-spot from the change in angle. 
“Sorry for what?”
“For Kai,” you blurt out. 
His hand wraps around your throat, tight enough to grab your attention and redirect it to him. “Use your words.” 
You look at him, blinking away the cloudiness from your vision to see the sweat glistening across his forehead and his heavy-lidded eyes covering his blown pupils. You can be upset at him later, but for now, you give him the apology he wants. “I’m sorry for fucking Kai.” 
He brings his lips to the shell of your ear — his exhale blowing from his nostrils like air from a pair of bellows. “I thought I told you I don’t fucking share, dove,” he scolds with the words searing off his tongue. “I let you fuck Josh.” A chill runs down your spine because he knows your feelings for his twin. Before tonight, this was all a role, an act that he knew turned you on. That line between it and the real him is becoming more and more blurred, with the phrase ringing in your ears, echoing around in your mind. “Don’t forget that.”
“Jake—“
He interrupts by swiping his wet fingers across your lips, painting them in a sticky, crimson smear. You lick across them, but there’s no denying the metallic taste of blood on your tongue. “Your pussy is mine,” he snarls, letting his jealousy possess him entirely. 
He pulls away slightly and guides you to lean back, creating space between you. You’re able to see the soiled state of Josh’s white t-shirt that you’re wearing. It’s stained in a spattering of bloody prints and wrinkled beyond recognition. You can’t dwell on it for long because Jake’s pace has quickened again, and when he realizes you haven’t responded, he snaps, “Say it!”
There’s ferality in his gaze, and you’re running off the adrenaline of it all — blinded by poisonous lust and raw emotion. “It’s yours.”
“Now touch it. Make yourself cum for me.”
You do as you’re told without hesitation, bringing your shaky fingers to your clit. He holds onto your hips as his line of sight floats from your face down to your pussy, watching you pleasure yourself while he continues to fuck you. 
You notice that his hair has fallen free from the hair elastic, draping most of his face in the curtain of chestnut locks. He’s held onto full control until this point, but now even he can’t hold back, grunting, “Fuck, I’ve missed this.”
Making eye contact with you, he tips his head and spits aggressively onto your swollen cunt — giving you an image you will never forget. He doesn’t even have to tell you what to do next. With slick fingers, you slip them effortlessly across yourself, using your favorite technique. 
You’re close. 
He’s beginning to falter as well, revealing to you that he’s not going to last much longer. You race to the finish line, frantic in your movements to make yourself orgasm. Fighting the temptation to cum, his strokes are a combination of deep and shallow, making sure to hit every spot inside you perfectly. He’s learned you well enough, after all. 
“Be a good girl and make it up to me,” he pants desperately.
It doesn’t take much more for you to fall apart. Within seconds, it all comes crashing down around you. You claw for him to be as close as possible, tightening your shaky legs around his waist to keep him inside you. What would normally be euphoric moans sung into the air, are broken cries and muffled curses. It might’ve been the release you were craving the most, but not the one you needed. 
Because you know when the dust begins to settle, you’ll be left with the truth of it all — those feelings without the sex to disguise them. 
TAGLIST:
@gretavanbitches @dannyandthekiszkas @asparrowofthedawn96 @ageofnations @garbagevanfleet @pennylanefics @alexxavicry @gvfficrecs @jakeyboiiiiiii @doodle417 @richjaaasss @pr41sethemoon @gretavanflowerpowerrr @joshskittytickler @tripthelightfatality @maddie-van-fleet @sarakay-gvf @josiee-gvf @milkgemini @sammiejane22 @gretavanbear @capturethechaos @welllauragvf @averagemisfit03 @myownparadise96 @givemeyourtots2 @gretavangroove @objectsinspvce @myownparadise96 @feilores @josh-iamyour-mama @givemeyourtots2 @joshkiszkasbigtoe @mydarlingdanny @shutupdevvie @twinszka @busybeingtrash @carlybubs @demonrat444 @high-fidelity1 @jake-kiszkas-smirk @sunandthemoontwinflames @klarxtr @sacredthethreadgvf @gracev0609
210 notes · View notes
samkiszkasfacialhair · 4 months
Text
Vengeance
Tumblr media
Vengeance
Pairing: Josh Kiszka and Female Reader
Summary: “When people misbehave, they get punished. That’s how they learn, ya know?”
Warnings: Pit viper Josh, punishment sex, degradation, dominant Josh, bondage (tying hands/wrists and blindfolding), use of the word “slut,” “slave,” and “whore,” puppy play (kind of), forced blow job, gagging, breath control, mention of vomit, humiliation, teasing, rough unprotected sex, impact to the face, spitting. 
Word Count: 6.5k
To say you planned to make Josh fall apart would be an understatement. However you never thought he’d turn the tables on you. 
As you stood there, with a metal shelf pressed against your back and your hands tied above your head with the strings of your bikini top, trying to figure out how to get yourself free, you thought back to the series of events that led you to this moment. 
It was a Kiszka family weekend. Their parents and sister had planned to come to see a show in a few days and the guys had the weekend free, which called for family activities. 
Each of the boys organized something. Jake booked everyone hotel rooms, Sam made reservations and covered the cost of all the dinners, and Josh booked the daily activities- which he specifically was very excited for, because you were staying by a lake. 
Josh rented a boat for one of the afternoons- something the entire family would enjoy.
So, a few days ago, you rush-shipped a new bikini and coverup for the trip and the day before leaving, it showed up at your front door.
Perfect.
It was a dark green cheeky bikini with little white flowers embroidered on it that was held together by just a few strings. It was cute however, it was a bit smaller in real life than it was according to the pictures online.
But the way it hugged and accentuated every part of your body that you wanted it to perfectly when you tried it on gave you a boost of confidence and not to mention, a few dirty thoughts- thoughts that you were sure were bound to cross Josh’s mind too. Besides, you loved time off with him. He wasn't as tired as he was during show days and you had more time for "activities."
He was going to love it, that much you were sure of.
But, you remembered, you’d also be around his family. So of course, you also purchased a cover up. The cover up was an off white knitted dress that would do its job for when you were around the family or at public places throughout the day. 
You packed bags for yourself and Josh and right before zipping up the bags, you admired to yourself how your new bathing suit unintentionally but probably subconsciously matched the one Josh was set to bring- white swim trunks with a subtle pattern of green accented shapes. You threw it on top of yours and zipped the suitcase.
***
“Sam just texted me that he’s leaving now so he’ll be at the dock in a few minutes. You ready?” Josh asked as he laid on the bed of your hotel room on his phone, not bothering to look up to you as you walked out of the bathroom.
“Mhm,” you hummed, giving yourself one last look in the mirror.
“Oka- Woah. No. Absolutely not,” Josh protested at the sight of you.
“What?” you asked as you continued to put your earrings in.
“The outfit! No!” he said with a chuckle coming off his lips as if it was all a big prank.
Instantly, you put on the charm.
“You don’t like it?” you asked innocently.
He sighed, rolled off the bed, and came over to where you were standing, clasping his hands behind your back and pulling you close to him.
“Don’t be like that, Mama. It’s just… a lot. Well, actually, it’s not a lot at all. You’re practically wearing nothing. I mean, my parents are gonna be there today,” he explained, getting a good look at you.
You gave him a little pout, dropped your chin, and looked at him through your lashes to hit him with your best puppy dog look. 
There was no sense in arguing. Josh knew you could be a bit of a handful at times and after all, that was something about you that he had to admit he loved- something that turned him on, even.
He laughed to himself and shook his head, “God, what am I gonna do with you?”
“Love you too, Baby,” you said sweetly as you gave him a quick kiss and a pat on his butt. 
After grabbing your bags and a case of beer, you Josh walked out of the hotel, and down to the dock to the boat he had rented hand in hand. You were the last ones to arrive- as usual with him. 
It was hot out but cloudy, and the breeze from the water was perfect. However, despite the clouds, Josh had on a pair of sunglasses. Pit Viper sunglasses to be exact. He loved them. You hated them. They made him look like a douche bag and he knew it. But, with you wearing a skimpy bikini that he didn’t exactly approve of, he figured he should include something you weren’t exactly a huge fan of as part of his outfit for the day. It was only fair.
Josh made a grand entrance upon stepping onto the boat, holding up the case of beer he brought and screaming out to his family to let them know the two of you had arrived.
The boat was big. It had a few decks as well as a full indoor living area, kitchen, and even a bedroom. There were also stairs leading down to an unlit area which you assumed led to storage and technical stuff.
After greeting his parents and sister, you sat down on a white padded bench near Sam who was was sitting crisscrossed on the deck of the boat while his girlfriend had her hands in his hair, tugging it this way and that as she put two French braids in it to keep it from blowing wildly in the wind.
“You look handsome with your hair like that, Sammy,” you said sweetly to him. 
“Thank you! You look lovely today by the way,” he replied.
You smiled at Sam’s compliment and looked at Josh with an I told you so look on your face. 
“Hm. At least Sammy thinks I look nice,” you whispered to him.
“I never said you didn’t” he said sternly as his jaw clench and he swallowed hard.
He lifted your legs up onto his lap and ran his free hand up and down them a few times before resting his hand just above your knee, almost as if he was claiming you.
“Don’t start something you can’t finish,” he warned in your ear, just above a whisper as the boat started moving. 
You opened your mouth to give him a smartass reply but stopped yourself when his dad stood in front of the two of you, handing you each a drink.
“You like black cherry, right?” his dad asked with a Whiteclaw extended to you.
“Yes, it’s my favorite, thank you!” you answered with a smile as you grabbed it from his hand. 
Josh took a can of beer from his dad, cracked it open, gulped down almost half of it right off the bat. 
“Slow down, Baby, no one’s taking it from you,” you giggled as you brought your hand to the back of his neck and swirled your fingers through the curls at the bottom of his head.
He swallowed and brought the ice cold can to your legs, using them as a table and sending shivers throughout your body.
As the boat sailed through the water, everyone drank, talked, and laughed. Everyone except Josh, who was quieter than usual. He was good at masking his emotions though. No one seemed to pick up on it except you. After all, you knew exactly why he was quiet. 
What you wanted to happen, was happening. It was only a matter of time before he broke.
Soon, the boat anchored at a shallower area of the lake. The captain informed you all that the water was about twenty feet deep, making it safe and suitable for jumping off the boat and swimming.
“You guys going in?” Jake asked the two of you, standing up and unbuttoning the black overshirt he had on. 
Josh looked over at you and raised his eyebrows, silently asking you if you wanted to go in. 
You didn’t answer Josh. Instead, you eyed Jake up and down, making sure Josh saw you do so.
“Yeah,” you said, replying not to Josh, but to Jake.
You sat up and gave Josh a small smile. He didn’t smile back. Instead, he tipped his sunglasses down so you could see his eyes which were strong and giving you a warning look.
Ignoring the “knock it off” look, you gave him a quick peck on the lips before taking off your white knitted cover up. When you pulled it over your head, instantly, you caught Sam and Jake’s eyes on you, despite their own girlfriends being there.
Sam was obvious. His eyes practically burned a hole into the fabric of your bikini. With her hands still braiding his hair, his girlfriend jerked his head around and he winced as his hair got pulled, a seemingly intentional move on her part.
Jake, at least, was smarter about it, hiding behind a pair of round black sunglasses and raising his beer can to his lips, taking a sip to hide his smile.
Even their dad gave Josh an approving look and a raise of his eyebrows. 
Josh handled each of them as he stood up to follow you.
He smacked the unbraided side of Sam’s head as he walked by him. 
He laughed his dad off as respectfully as he could. 
And as he walked by Jake, who was standing on the edge of the boat, he gave him a push and watched him fall into the water below him. 
The sound of his body hitting the water was all you heard until you looked over to see him laughing with just his head out of the water, his body completely invisible as it emerged in the dark lake water surrounding him. 
“You dick!” he shouted jokingly, “You better get your ass in here and bring me a new beer!”
Josh turned to you, pulling you in tight by your waist, “You heard your boyfriend,” he teased, “better get your ass in there,” he said, smirking.
“Jealous?” you asked sweetly.
He looked down at your chest and then back to your face.
 “No,” he answered, stretching out the word fighting back a smile. 
“Yeah, we’ll see about that,” you said as you gave him a peck and jumped off the boat and into the water with Jake. 
Immediately, Josh followed behind you and eventually, Sam, his girlfriend, Jake’s girlfriend, and Ronnie were all in the water with you.
After a while of swimming with the group, having canned drinks thrown down to you all by their parents, and Sam and Jake swimming away to pee, you started to get cold and the group of you got back onto the boat before it took off again to head to another location in the lake. 
As you sat on the top deck in just your bikini, with your legs in Josh’s lap, the sun started burning off the clouds little by little, making the day grow hotter, which was nice considering you were in a cold, wet bathing suit.
“You’re getting a little pink, Baby,” you said, pressing your fingertips onto Josh’s sunkissed shoulder and releasing them to see a small pale dot linger behind before returning to the same color pink around it.
“Yeah you can still burn even with the overcast,” Sam interjected, squinting up to the sky. 
Josh rolled his eyes. Sam didn’t have that problem and he never did. Sam’s skin always held strong under just one layer of SPF 30 all day while Jake and Josh would be better off reapplying SPF 50 every hour. Sam’s comment also didn’t help with Josh already annoyed at him. 
“You want 50?” his dad asked, holding out a can of sunscreen.
“Ah, yes, that’s perfect,” you said, standing up and reaching for the can from his dad, making sure you pushed your ass and tits out just a bit more than your normally would, “Thank you!”
“Course,” his dad replied.
Josh grabbed your wrist to stop you from twisting the nozzle open, “Actually, you wanna go inside with me? Get a drink and be in the shade for a little?” he asked quietly.
“M’kay,” you replied, getting up, handing his dad the can of sunscreen back, and following him inside the boat as the sounds of his family members talking and laughing muffled with the closing the glass door behind you. 
“I want to make something very clear to you,” he said as he pulled you down the stairs by your arm and swung you around to face him once you reached the landing and were out of earshot of the captain of the boat.
The way he whipped you around made your breath hitch in your throat and you exhaled hard as your eyes met his and he continued speaking through his teeth. 
“You want to dress like a slut? Act like a slut? I will treat you like a slut. And then we’ll see just how you like it, hm?”
You looked at yourself in the reflection of his sunglasses and smiled just a bit, tugging at your bottom lip with your teeth. You hated those sunglasses but you were so thankful for them right now. You had to admit, you loved seeing what he saw as you looked at the reflection in them. And right now, all you saw was a little brat who deserved whatever was coming her way.
If he wanted to, you’d let him take you on the stairs right then and there for anyone to see. That’s how bad you wanted and needed him right now. 
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said sweetly, playing dumb.  
“Really?” he asked rehtorically, “You think I didn’t notice all that shit you pulled with my brothers out there? Hm? And my fucking dad?”
“I was being nice. Unlike you who got a little attitude all of a sudden,” you said fighting back a smile. 
You knew you weren’t just being nice.
“Yeah the way you were looking at Jake was really nice, wasn’t it?”
“You know what, I think you are jealous after all,” you replied.
“And I think, you need to be taught a lesson,”
“So teach me then,” you said, crossing your arms in front of you, making sure you pushed your tits up just a bit with it.
That was it and you knew it. Those four words sent Josh to his breaking point and the look on his face proved it.
Josh smiled, shook his head, and let out a laugh through his mouth as he traced his bottom teeth with his tongue. 
“Teach you? Oh I’ll teach you,” he said as he pulled onto your arm and led you down the narrow corridor of the basement of the boat and into a small room that was seemingly reserved for the crew members. 
He slammed the door behind him and twisted the dead bolt to lock it. 
He flicked on a light switch to reveal that you were both standing in a storage closet, containing just a utility sink and a metal wire shelf that was stocked from ceiling to floor with cleaning supplies.
“What’s your word, Mama?” he asked with his hands in his hair, untying the white bandana that he was wearing.
“Red,” you said clearly.
“And what if you can’t talk?”
“Shake my head three times.”
“Perfect,” he said, smiling at you and then turning his attention to the bandana between his fingers as he gave it a good tug. 
There was a ball of anxiety in your stomach that was more excited than nervous or fearful. The two of you had experimented with stuff like this before. You trusted Josh with everything in you and even though you knew he was about to completely ruin you for his own pleasure and entertainment, you knew you were in good hands. After all, this is what you hoped for.
“Now,” he began as he spun you around, grabbed your wrists and held them together in his hand behind your back, “I don’t give a fuck about your pleasure. I don’t give a fuck if you cum. You misbehaved. And when people misbehave…” he paused for a second to tug the bandana tight around your wrists, “They get punished. That’s how they learn. Ya know?”
All your body would let out was a hum in agreement as Josh grabbed your shoulders and spun you around forcefully, manhandling you.
“So,” he whispered as he brought his face close to yours, “It’s time for you to learn so this doesn't happen again,” he said as he flicked the tip of your nose.
He used one hand to sneak to the back of your neck and untie your bikini top. In just a few seconds, the strings were undone and the top came tumbling down, exposing your bare chest to him. The second string that wrapped around your back was still in place though, keeping the two triangles of the top just dangling over your stomach, swinging back and forth as you moved your body.
The same hand continued down your chest and he swirled his fingertips over your nipple lightly, causing your back to arch involuntarily at his touch.
“Mmm, feels good?” he asked softly with his mouth an inch away from yours.
“Yeah,” you breathed out in a whisper, closing your eyes and subconsciously bringing your face closer to go in to kiss him. A kiss which never happened because Josh pulled his face back.
In a second, a sinister chuckle left his lips and a sharp pain rang through your chest as he pinched and pulled upward on your nipple.
“Don’t get used to it,” he said bluntly, giving it one last tug before ripping his fingers from you.
“Get on your knees,” he commanded as he crossed his arms over his chest.
You did as he said and dropped down so that your face was at eye level with the bulge in his swim trunks.
“What are you waiting for? Take ‘em off,” he said sharply.
“Josh,” you said bluntly, “I can’t,” you emphasized your words, reminding him that your hands were tied behind your back. 
He didn’t need to be reminded. He didn’t care.
“Get creative. You’ll find a way.”
You looked up at his face and then down at his shorts which were at eye level. All you had was your mouth. 
Inching closer to him on your knees, you took your teeth to the waistband of his shorts right by his hip bone, and tugged down. 
They came down an inch on one side and you crawled to the other side of him and did the same there.
Back and forth you went, on your knees, tugging Josh’s trunks down an inch at a time on each side, looking absolutely pathetic, as he stood from above and watched with a smirk on his face, laughing at you. You couldn’t even see his eyes through his sunglasses, all you saw was yourself, his slave, in the reflection of them.
After getting his shorts down about halfway and struggling to get them to come off past his bulge, he had had enough and he pulled his shorts down the rest of the way, fully revealing his hard cock to you. 
“Suck it,” he commanded.
You looked up at him, licked your lips, and leaned forward to take his dick in your mouth. 
The second the tip of his dick pushed past your lips he let out a sigh of pleasure and grabbed the back of your head.
Instantly, he started using his hands to guide you. He used your hair as leverage, pulling at your roots and pushing down on your head as he moved you back and forth. It felt good- that little sting that came with each pull. 
Normally, you’d be able to add some “technique” to sucking his dick. You’d use your hands and twist them around his shaft. You’d be able to go at your own pace, starting slow and sucking the tip the way he liked it. You could swirl your tongue around the head of his dick or cup his balls to send him over the edge a bit. But not this time. All you had was your open mouth. He was in control of everything. 
In a way, you were glad he was. You could barely keep your own balance due to not being able to use your hands and water dripping from both your bathing suits and your hair had made the floor just a bit slippery below your knees, causing them to slide around a bit. Not to mention, you were on a moving boat.
However, him being in control of everything meant he was going to use you just the way he wanted to.
Quickly, he picked up the pace.
Josh let go of your hair and his hands gripped the sides of your head and pulled you back and forth on his dick with force a few times.
But that wasn’t enough for him. He stilled his hands, kept your head steady, and started thrusting his hips into you, fucking your face. 
The gargle sounds that started in your throat and came out of your mouth as the saliva collected in your open mouth and began dripping onto your chin were something you’d only ever heard in porn before. 
He looked down at you the entire time and you looked up at him, watching yourself in the reflection of his sunglasses. You could see and feel your own saliva dripping down between your tits.
With every thrust, his sunglasses slid further and further off his nose and you flinched as they came down, just missing your face, and hitting the floor to your left. 
He stopped for a minute with his dick still in your mouth and both turned your eyes to the floor where you could just faintly see the sunglasses in your peripheral vision.
“Pick ‘em up,” he instructed and he pushed your head off of his dick backwards.
You wiggled your body around and leaned sideways awkwardly to grab at them, but you were unsuccessful. You tried a few times, grabbing them with your fingers before dropping them time after time. The way your wrists were tied up didn’t allow your hands for much movement. Not to mention the way you had to bend around was difficult and was stretching your back in painful ways, causing you to wince and whine as you tried. 
You sat back on your heels and looked up at him, defeated and out of breath. 
He laughed, “You are absolutely pathetic, Baby. Come on, I thought you were smarter than this.” 
You looked at the glasses on the floor again and sighed. Still sitting on your heels, you turned yourself around, giving him a view of your ass with your hands tied right above it, which you were sure he loved.
And just as he wanted you to, like nothing but an obedient dog, you leaned down and with your mouth, picked up the glasses and crawled back around to present them to him.
He reached down and cupped the side of your face gently, a contrast to how he had been handing you for the past few minutes.
“That’s a good girl,” he cooed the same way he would reward Sam’s dog for doing a trick, as he took the sunglasses from your mouth. 
You fully expected him to put them back on his own face but instead, he reached down and put them on you. 
In any normal circumstance, this would be a soft act of kindness. But not in this one. This was just another way of humiliating and degrading you, and the next words out of his mouth proved it.
“There we go, that’s better,” he said softly and sweetly, before his tone changed as he continued, “Yeah,” he laughed, “I don't even want to look at you.”
He stroked himself a few times before he continued, “Now, is my good little puppy ready for her treat? Open,” he said as he grabbed the back of your head and forced you onto his dick once more and held you there. 
You gagged around his dick as it hit the back of your throat. You concentrated on breathing through your nose as your throat closed around his dick. You were swallowing his cock and your own saliva all while fighting back vomit that you could feel forcing its way up your throat. 
Tears welled up in your eyes ran down your face, causing the inside of the glasses to fog up to the point where you could no longer see anything. 
He kept one hand on the back of your head and used the other one to take hold of your nose and squeeze your nostrils shut.
At that point, you had lost feeling in your arms, you couldn’t see, and now you couldn’t breathe. 
The only thing you could do was feel him using you and take it. Your mouth was nothing but a hole for Josh to use to get himself off. Every ounce of dignity was stripped from you. The only thing that even provided you with the slightest bit of it was your bathing suit bottoms that were still intact but pooling with your own wetness as Josh continued fucking your face.
You were a second away from shaking your head to get him to stop when he shoved you away aggressively, allowing you to suck in a massive and well earned breath as well as close your mouth to swallow properly for the first time in what felt like forever. 
He pushed the glasses up onto your forehead, allowing you to regain your sense of sight, and both of you watched a string of saliva connecting your mouth to his dick stretch and eventually break apart into two pieces landing on his thigh and your chest. 
Breathing with your mouth open to catch your breath, you sat back on your heels and looked up at him, desperately, as he looked down at you with a pleased expression on his face. 
You were practically panting to catch your breath when he reached down and lifted your chin to close your mouth.
“Close your mouth, Baby, you look like a whore.”
No shit.
He held onto your cheeks and smooshed them together, hard, causing your lips to part and letting all the excess saliva ooze between your teeth, bubble out, and dribble down your chin.
For just a fraction of a second, he smiled at you. It was so brief that if you would have blinked in that exact second, you wouldn’t have seen it. 
And just as quickly, his expression was serious again as he released your cheeks from his grip with a push to your face. 
With that same hand, he swirled your hair around his wrist and held it tight in a makeshift ponytail in his fist before using it to yank you up to your feet. 
You winced as he pulled you up forcefully, feeling your neck stretch as your legs tried to keep up with how quickly he was pulling.
As he pulled you up, you slipped around on the floor which was not only covered in lake water, but now drops of your own saliva. Josh held you steady for a moment with each of his hands gripping your upper arms. 
He spun you around, freed your wrists, and spun you around again so that you were now facing him.
He threw the bandana to the floor on top of his disregarded swim trunks.
“Take that off,” he commanded, jutting his chin out toward your bikini top that was hanging by one loose knot just below your ribcage.
Careful not to drop it, you untied it, pulled it off, and handed it to him, unsure of the next plan he had for you. 
“That little bratty mouth of yours served me well, Mama. But now,” he said as he held your wrists together in front of you and wrapped the bikini top strings around them a couple times, “Let’s see what that pussy can do for me, hm?”
He walked you backwards a few steps until your back made contact with the metal shelf behind you, causing you to shiver from how cold it was.
He raised your tied wrists over your head and using the rest of the bikini top, he secured your wrists to the top wire shelf, wrapping the string around in the most unconventional way and creating knots that would be close to impossible to undo.
He gave your wrists a yank and when they didn’t detach from the shelf or slip out of the ties, he smiled to himself with satisfaction. 
He walked around to the front of you and looked you up and down.
“Comfortable?”
“No,” you whined as you moved around a bit, struggling.
“Aw that’s too bad, Mama. You look so pretty like this. All desperate and helpless. Nothing but a whore for a good fuck,” he said as he sucked his teeth and gave you a condescending pout.
He took one finger, starting at your wrist, and ran it down the inside of your entire arm.
You squirmed as his finger brushed over your armpit and down to your nipple, giving it a flick before his hand came up to your chin. 
With his other hand, he grabbed the front of your bikini bottom and pulled tight, letting the fabric create a burning friction between your folds. 
You let out a whimper of pain. 
“Jo-” you whined.
“Shhhh,” he said, shushing you but also finishing the last sound of his name that you whined out.
He let go and the elastic in the bottoms snapped back onto your skin with a sting. He pushed the crotch of your bikini bottom to the side, feeling around with his fingers- feeling the wetness that had accumulated. Slowly, he dipped two fingers inside you and pulled them back out.
“You like all this a bit too much, don’t you?” he asked in a sweet voice, “Maybe a bit more than you should?”
He was right. You liked this more than you should. A lot more than you should. Any sane person would find this completely humiliating and degrading. But surprisingly, this got you more turned on than anything. 
You wanted Josh to use you. You wanted him to treat you like an object- not a person- nothing but a masturbation tool for him. 
You nodded in response as he pulled his wet fingers up and held them in between both of your faces, rubbing them back and forth, inspecting what was left on them.
“You know, I’m starting to think you planned this whole thing,” he said, smiling sinisterly, "You're smarter than you look,"
He picked up the bandana off the floor and wiped his fingers with it before balling it up and shoving it in your mouth.
“You like how you taste?” he asked with his hand covering your mouth tight.
“Mhm,” you said with your voice muffled from both the bandana and his hand.
“I’m gonna give you something that you’re really gonna like then,” he whispered as he lifted your leg up and placed your foot on the ledge of the utility sink next to you. 
Still holding the crotch of your bottoms to the side with one hand, he lined himself up with your entrance and then held onto your hip with his other hand as he slid inside you, bottoming out and filling you up completely. 
He started off slow, pulling out most of the way before filling you up again. However, he quickly picked up the speed and pressure, pushing your back into the metal shelf behind you with every thrust. 
That familiar dull ache began forming deep in your stomach as he kept going. It would come and go with his movements. Normally, you’d be able to tell him what to do to make you cum and he’d do it happily. But not this time. Right now, you knew your place. You were his toy, nothing but a set of holes for him to jack off into. Your pleasure meant absolutely nothing to him, he said it himself. If you asked him for anything to help you get closer to a release, he’d do the opposite and laugh at you.
As he continued, you felt the string of your bikini bottom come loose and fall over your leg and his. You looked down to see the strings dangling from your body and swung around between the two of you.
Upon looking down, the glasses that he had rested on the top of your head, once again, fell to the floor. But this time, Josh paid them no mind.
Instead, he pushed on your left leg that was held up by the sink and used your thigh for leverage, allowing himself to go in at a deeper angle as his other hand white knuckled the shelf behind you.
He grunted and breathed hard through his teeth while you whimpered in both pain and pleasure while biting down hard on the now soaked bandana.
All it took was one particularly deep and hard thrust to send a pornographic combination of expletives and moans from your mouth into the air.
“Oh God, Josh! FUCK!” you screamed, letting the now saliva soaked bandana to fall to the floor. 
Josh reached his hand up to your face laid his entire palm on your cheek with a hard slap before forcing four of his fingers into the side of your mouth and pulling your lips apart as he hooked his hand around so the palm of it was on your cheek and he was pressing your head back into the shelf as he continued fucking you.
“Come on, Mama, louder. Let ‘em all hear. You’re lucky I’m not fucking you up there, letting Sammy and Jake have their turns too. Bet you’d love that, wouldn’t you? Keep it in the family, huh? You wanna fuck my dad too? Be my new step mom? You want that, don’t you? Disgusting.”
“No,” you argued back.
But with his hand prying your mouth open, you couldn’t get your lips or tongue to make the right N sound, which in turn made you sound the most pathetic you ever have.
“I’m sorry you’ll have to enunciate. What was that?” he asked with a chuckle coming off his lips, knowing damn well you loved being his little fuck toy and you were his to humiliate.
“I aid o!” you attempted to say.
“Oh you said no? Didn’t seem like it considering you’re all over them, wearing this slutty little bikini. Oh you look so handsome Sammy! Good for nothing but sucking and fucking,” he said, pushing into you harder as he spoke those specific words.
He started slamming into you mercilessly. The shelf behind you began moving and hitting the wall with each thrust with a thud. Paper towel rolls began falling from the top shelf onto the floor. Bottles of soap and cleaning products began falling over on the shelves as Josh pushed you into it.
Despite all that, Josh didn’t stop. Instead, he put his foot up on the bottom rung of the shelf and lifted his hips up underneath you, pushing himself deeper than ever before.
That was it. That was all it took to send you over the edge. The building feeling in your stomach came to a peak right there and exploded.
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head and you watched the inside of your eyelids flicker open and close as you felt yourself tighten around Josh’s dick with your orgasm pulsing through your body. 
It was like nothing you’d ever experienced before. It was deep and strong and well earned.
The sounds that came out of your mouth were unintelligible. 
He fucked you through your orgasm and right into his, letting out a deep moan as he released himself inside you. He closed his eyes tight and furrowed his eyebrow as waves of visible pleasure filled his entire body causing his body to twitch as they hit.
When he finished, he stilled his movements and let go of your face; and the two of you, with your faces less than an inch apart, just stared at each other in awe, breathing heavily. Almost like neither of you could believe any of that just happened. 
Gently, he cupped your face, as if he was silently asking you if you were okay. It was like time stopped for just a second with him.
“You’re so pretty,” he whispered, looking at you with a genuine softness in his eyes.
He broke eye contact and looked down as he pulled himself out of you. Slowly, he lowered your leg back to the ground before cleaning himself off in the sink. He splashed cold water on his face and shook it off. You watched him as you felt the warmness of his cum starting to drip out of you.
Josh reached down to the bottom shelf next to you and uncapped a plastic bottle of water. 
“Open,” he said as he lifted your chin up and poured water in your mouth carefully in an act of kindness.
You swallowed a few times and he pulled the bottle away, letting the excess water drip down your chin, neck, and chest. 
He gulped down what was left in the bottle and when he was done, he pulled his shorts back on and stood back, admiring his work. 
Your hair was a mess- half wet, half dry, and tangled. There was black makeup streaming down your face. Saliva, both wet and dry, had run from your mouth, to your chin, and down to your stomach, leaving a wet spot on the top of the crotch of your bikini bottoms, which were hanging on loosely by one hip as his cum dripped down your inner thigh. 
Finally, to put the finishing touches on his masterpiece, he got his face close to yours and expecting a kiss, you lifted your chin to him. 
“Now,” he began, “What do you say?” he said softly, letting the word “say” draw out a bit.
“Thank y-,” you started to say when you were interrupted by Josh spitting on your face.
You flinched as it hit your face.
He aimed for your mouth but missed by just a bit, landing just below your bottom lip, giving his saliva no choice but to trickle down your chin and then down your chest, where it fell in and mixed with every other bodily fluid imaginable. 
He picked up his sunglasses and bandana from the floor and ran them under water in the sink. 
“Well,” he said casually as he laid the bandana across the edge of the sink to dry and shook the excess water off the glasses, “I’m gonna go take a nap so, I’ll see you later, Mama.”
“You’re seriously not going to get me out of this?” you asked with your hands still tied to the shelf.
“Eh,” he said, “You’re smart, I’m sure you’ll figure something out,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders as he opened the door and shut it behind him, flicking off the lights as he left, leaving you there as you were. 
In the darkness you moved around a bit until a little green blinking light above the door caught your eye.
A security camera.
Fuck.
Author’s Note: I’m so sorry (no I’m not).
195 notes · View notes
ficthots · 1 year
Text
Uncharted Territory
Tumblr media
A/N: I am so sorry for the long wait. I hope this makes up for it. Josh and his assistant, badish boy goodish girl, fluff, angst, dirtiness. As always let me know what you guys think and enjoy!
Part II
Warnings: SMUT. DNI if you are under 18. 18+ only.
Word Count: 16.9k+
There are a few things in life that just outright suck no matter the spin you try to put on them. Running out of gas on the side of the highway during rush hour because you were running late for work this morning and were stupid enough to say I’ll just do it in the morning. Sucks. Dropping your phone down four flights of stairs because you decided it was time to stop being lazy by taking the elevator every morning and just climb the stairs. Sucks. You know what sucks most of all?
Job interviews.
They were never fun. You had seen many videos on the internet about how to present the very best of yourself in an interview, sell yourself to whoever was showing interest, make them realize they absolutely needed you in their work force. Of course you knew how to apply all of those little quips and tricks into the interview process. Did it make it suck any less?
Nope.
Interviews were still incredibly nerve wracking. Feeling like you were going to stumble over answers, blank on the simplest questions, not know how to apply all of your previous job history to what you were trying to get hired for. Despite how perfect you were for this job, it still sucked.
One of your closest friends had tipped it to you. Saying that one of their friends friends was going to be interviewing to be an assistant to some guy in a band. That there were four members of the band and they were getting so big so quickly that they were all going to be needing their own assistant to handle their daily work loads. 
She had nudged you at lunch one afternoon with a suggestive eyebrow wiggle, mentioning how she could get you an application and interview no problem. You had never heard of them before, immediately pulling them up on Spotify and seeing their monthly listener amount was significantly higher than you originally had assumed. 
It was exactly what you needed to get out of the hellhole you were trapped in now. Believe you me, you were well trained in being an executive assistant. It was what you were doing now, the only downside was your boss was a raging bitch. Your boss before her was not much better, but the experience you most definitely had. This could be your chance to break out of the corporate world of assistants and try something new.
What did you have to lose?
You submitted the application that evening with a resume and cover letter, not expecting anything to come of it. That’s why when you woke up the next morning and saw a message marked urgent from a name you were not familiar with, your stomach flipped. 
Opening the email and asking if you could make it to the first round of interviews the very next day, you were in a permanent state of shock. Agreeing, in a somewhat state of brain fog and letting your mind go to autopilot to handle the interview, it must have gone well.
So well, you were now sitting in round three of interviews after being informed that it had been narrowed down to two people per band member and you were the front runner for all of them. They would be the final interviewer and would be selecting their own assistant. 
Your hands were ice cold, but your mind was still nagging at you that they must somehow feel clammy, nerves wracking your body feeling like your bones were vibrating. Blood was rushing in your ears as you sat at a large conference style table, the view of Nashville quite breathtaking from the floor to ceiling wall of windows, but you were unable to truly take it in. There were five seats on one side of the table, one singular on the opposite side that you occupied.
It was like flipping a switch, putting all nerves at bay and standing as the door opened, offering a tight lipped smile, putting your hand out to give a firm and strong handshake to each of the gentlemen that entered the room. You only knew one, their manager, who had been at your other interviews.
The others were new. As you took them in, you made a mental note about one distinct feature of each to help you memorize their names as quickly as possible. “Mr. Frank, it’s a pleasure seeing you again. Thank you for seeing me through this far,” you took a seat as the others did as well.
He gave a beaming smile, tearing his gaze away from his notepad to catch your gaze. “Absolutely. Let me introduce you to these four. Directly next to me is Daniel Wagner,” he gave a small wave, noting his hair was going to be his distinct feature. “You can call me Danny.” You nodded politely at him, your smile never faltering. 
“Next to him is Sam Kiszka,” he was leaning far back in his chair, almost like he had been forced to be here and do this. He had a dog. “Nice to meet ya. Heard you are practically the best of the best so it’s gonna be a blood bath to claim you as an assistant,” you couldn’t hold in the laugh that bubbled from your throat at his nonchalant tone as he explained that to you. 
Your hands still resting on your lap, you nodded. “That’s very kind of you to say.” They all chuckled, Mr. Frank continuing down the line. “Next to Sam is twin two, Jake Kiszka.” Big hat. It was all you noticed about him honestly. Oh, and that he had a sort of pirate vibe to him. 
He offered nothing more than a slight hat tip and a small grin. You returned the same. Trying to match all of their energy that they were giving you and being a mirror to them was your strategy here. You didn’t care who you were assigned to as long as you were assigned to someone. Anything to get away from your devil of a manager now. 
“And all the way down there is the front man, Josh Kiszka. Twin one.” When your eyes locked with his, you noticed too many things at once to make a note of. You wouldn’t need to. You would remember him.
His eyes were bright and overly large as he peered at you. His cheeks were flushed with a light pink hue. His hands nervously played with each other as they rested on the table in front of him. His tongue continuously darting out to moisten his lips. His lips parted, a toothy smile appearing as he held a hand up in an awkward gesture. 
“Josh. It’s-uh, it’s nice to meet you. Aaron has said a lot about you, all good of course. We’re all very interested. Obviously, I mean in a professional way. Like we want you. As in for your work that is strictly professional. Jesus Christ,” he was speaking so fast and with each word his face grew more red in tint, his siblings stifling their laughter behind their hands as they watched him falter.
Mr. Frank’s hands came down onto the table, swiveling his chair from the direction of the boys back to you, eyes wide in amusement as he laughed. “Okay anyways. I want to first thank you for being so patient with the entire interview process. I know it can be draining and meticulous to do this and you have been outstanding, truly. This can be kind of a niche job and we wanted to make sure that we select the right candidates and that is most definitely you.”
Your smile grew as you thanked him, still remaining mostly silent to let him continue on. “Now, we want you to start as soon as possible. It’s my understanding that you’re currently employed elsewhere so you’ll be needing to put in a notice there, correct?” 
Falling into easy conversation about your notice for your current job, starting date for this position, and the mind boggling amount of travel that you would be doing over the course of their tour had your head spinning. Thrilled that they were so interested in you and that the shitty interviewing process was seemingly over had you trapezing on air.
As Mr. Frank set his pen down, he set his attention on the group, gesturing a hand towards you. “What have you decided?” They all spun around in their chairs, huddling together with their heads all bent in, whispering. The one with the hat- Sam? Damn it, that’s Jake, turned first giving a larger smile than before.
He had selected you. That was fine, you could deal with that. He seemed extremely lowkey and easy going. No problems there. Although, trying to get him to stay on task and get done what needs to be done could pose some issues. That’s what you were there for though, to ensure that he would get his shit together and done. What he wouldn’t complete you would do for him. It came with the terms and conditions. 
While your mind was reeling, already starting to go a mile a minute on what was going to be happening as Jake’s assistant, it came to a sudden halt. “You will be working with Josh. He needs the most structure and guidance to keep him on task and I feel like your personalities will really mesh well.” 
You subdued your surprised expression, keeping your face neutral. If there was anyone you thought you most definitely would not be getting assigned to, it was Josh. He could hardly look you in the eye and the boy was extremely jittery. 
When his beat red face met yours, you gave him a kind smile. It seemed like he needed it. You immediately reached into your bag, grabbing your card and handing it over to Josh and then proceeding to do the same with the others. 
“That’s fantastic. Mr. Kiszka, I look forward to working with you. On this card is my current contact information. I know I am Mr. Kiszka’s assistant, but please do not hesitate to reach out if you need anything. Mr. Frank informed me that I will be receiving a new phone with a new number so I will have that new information to you shortly, but in the meantime that is the current way to contact me if need be.” Mr. Frank’s smile grew as he watched how at the drop of a hat you switched into professional mode.
They all eyed you in shock, looking at the card in their hands like it was made of solid gold. Turning your attention fully to your new boss, you stuck your hand out, watching as he gingerly grabbed it, shaking your hand back. 
Cold. Nicotine use, you thought to yourself. It would explain why he constantly seemed flushed, but the circulation was poor in his extremities. You would get him on some vitamins to fix that, you made a mental note to start that immediately. 
Two weeks positively flew by. Packing up your office and hardly uttering any parting words to anyone, you felt a weight lift from your shoulders as you left the building. This next chapter of your life was going to be one you couldn’t wait to embark on. Subletting your apartment proved easier than you originally assumed. Where you would be staying on the few breaks that were scheduled, you would deal with later, but for the meantime, you were ready. 
Already having a copy of the key to his home, you sent him a fast text reminding him of your appointment with him that afternoon to start going over his schedule, so as not to frighten him when you let yourself into his home. When you pulled up to the curb, you noticed a white Jeep parked in his driveway. Only one car? Odd. Maybe there’s more in the garage. It is a three car garage. 
Walking up to the front door, you used the key, but noticed it was already unlocked. You sighed, shaking your head, but entered the home. It was beautiful at first glance. There was natural wood covering every square inch. The large living room was open concept to the kitchen and dining room. The back wall had large windows that showcased a woodland view. 
Continuing further inwards, your head inclined towards the hallway to see if you could catch sight of him anywhere. When he appeared from the oversized pantry, he jumped, hand landing on his chest. “Fuck! Jesus, you scared the shit out of me.”
He laughed, setting down the bag he had in his hand onto the counter, you chuckled and held up your phone and key. “Apologies. I did text you to let you know I was on my way. You did say text was the easiest way to reach you, right? By the way, you need to always lock your door. There are crazies out there and stalkers and if they find your front door is just unlocked, they will enter.” 
Setting down your belongings at the dining table you had noticed was set up for your meeting, you continued speaking, Josh approaching the table to join you. Opening your planner, checking your phone once more to silence it and place it face down on the table, your eyes met his as you took a seat. 
He didn’t sit, instead offering a large smile, motioning to the house. “Can I give you a tour?” You immediately agreed, standing from the chair as you leisurely began strolling around the home.
“And yes, text is the easiest way to reach me and I saw yours which is why the door was unlocked. I forgot you had a key,” you nodded as you eyed some artwork that he had hanging in one of the hallways. 
Walking around with him was like getting a front row seat to his entire being. How and why he decorated the way he did, his purpose behind it all. He was a fascinating man you were quickly learning. 
Getting back to the dining room, you sat with a large smile and undid the cap on your pen, taking in a deep breath and smiling at him. “Well, Mr. Kiszka, I appreciate you giving me a tour. Your home is breathtaking, really. We should get started. We have a lot of ground to cover in two hours,” his hands enveloped a cup of tea he had brought with him, taking in a large breath as you dove in.
It was thoroughly exhausting starting from scratch with a new boss. Having to learn about their daily habits and quirks. What foods they preferred and when they preferred them. Understanding how often they were on their devices. Memorizing their normal routines and schedules. Honestly, exhausting. 
As you checked over your notes, sipping the glass of water he had gotten for you, it was about time to wrap it up for the day. “Okay, I believe that is just about all I needed from you today. I will be sending over that boarding pass and itinerary. You know I should probably do it now while I’m thinking about it,” grabbing your laptop, you sent the email at lightning speed, Josh’s eyebrows shooting up in surprise. 
“Is there anything else you’ll be needing from me, Mr. Kiszka? Of course, you can always text me, call me, email me whenever, but while I’m here,” your eyes finally looked up from your screen to connect with his squinted ones. 
Leaning back in his chair, his arms crossed over his chest, he shrugged. “Actually, yes.” You perked, sitting up straight to give him your undivided attention. “We are going to be spending a lot of time together,” you nodded, listening intently to him, “so I would like to know more about you.”
Shrugging, you fought within yourself about how to word your response to him without offending him in any way. “With all due respect Mr. Kiszka-” he cut you off with a roll of his eyes and a laugh, “Please stop calling me that. No one calls me that. Really, even Joshua, my government name, would be better.” You tilted your head at him, a disapproving look on your face.
“Mr. Kiszka. I am your assistant, your employee, your go to gal for anything you need,” you took in a breath, trying to explain this to him in the most professional manner you could, “however; I am not your friend. I am not paid to be your friend. I think in order for this to work as smoothly as possible and to ensure I get my work done and you get your work done, we need to recognize this as a boss and subordinate setting.” A smirk was tugging at the corners of his mouth, nodding with a chuckle. 
His hands were folded on his lap, one leg crossed over the other, the dark green jumpsuit not long enough to cover his entire leg when he was sitting like this, your eyes narrowed at him. “No, I completely understand that. You don’t want to be my friend-” you held your hand up to him, one singular finger pointing up, “I never said I didn’t want to be your friend, but that this is only a professional relationship.”
Rolling his eyes again, an amused look took over his sharp features. “Mhm. Well, as your boss I would like you to tell me one fun fact about yourself. Can be anything. Just one fun fact,” setting your jaw at his words, you thought of the most surface level fact you could think of.
“I don’t have a favorite color.” His head fell back, a large laugh shaking his throat. “Bullshit! Everyone has a favorite color. Whether it’s one that you tend to gravitate towards or one that catches your eye more often than others. You most definitely favorite one color.” Shaking your head as you packed up your things, you didn’t look at him. 
Slinging your bag over your shoulder, your hands held onto the back of the chair you had just risen from. “No. I do not.” You offered a shrug, starting towards the front door, your boss following you on the way out. 
When you turned around as you reached the door, his smirk never left his lips. “I’ll find out what your favorite color is. I’ll be the one to discover it for you.” You sighed with a laugh, turning on your heel as you took your keys from your bag. “Have a good night, Mr. Kiszka!” You called over your shoulder, hearing the door shut behind you as you made your way to your car.
Seeing the small bag sitting on your passenger seat you cursed under your breath, grabbing it and heading back to the house. Trying the handle first, you groaned as you realized he hadn’t locked it. “Mr. Kiszka!” His head popped back out from where you two had just been, coming back to the entryway.
“This is for you. Take one a day, recommended with food.” His eyebrows furrowed as he pulled the bottle from the bag. “Vitamin B concentrate. What’s this for?” Your hands were clasped together in front of you, smiling as you explained. 
“Nicotine use, right?” He nodded, a sheepish grin on his face. “That’s what I thought. Your hands are always freezing, but you’re flush constantly. Poor circulation is tied to nicotine use. Vitamin B concentrate aids with many things, but circulation is one of them.” He looked floored that based on one previous meeting you had gathered that information about him. 
Looking at you dumbfounded, he laughed, shaking the pill bottle. “Okay. I will add this to my vitamins list.” You pointed at him at the mention of that. “Send me that list. When we’re on the road it’ll be my responsibility to ensure that you’re always stocked. Oh, and lock the door!”
Nodding at you, he held the front door as you walked to your car once again. When your name echoed out into the air around you, you turned to face him. “Next time, you park in the driveway, okay?” You shot him a thumbs up over your shoulder, thanking him as you entered your car, heading home to begin packing for a trip you were unsure how to pack for. 
Less is probably more, you thought as you searched through your closet. When your phone began ringing, issuing an alert for an incoming Facetime call, you sighed, grabbing it amongst the pile of clothes you had taken out to begin folding and packing away. 
“Hi, mom and siblings.” Their smiling faces met yours, your mom diving right in. “Okay, first day with the new boss. How’d it go?” You looked at the screen, setting the phone up on your dresser, facing you so you could use your hands while still talking to them. 
Placing one packing cube into the luggage, you shrugged. “Busy. It’s still the beginning stages so it’s just a lot of memorization and observation right now. Taking over their schedules, trying to notice every single thing about them. It’s taxing,” your mom hummed in response. 
When your sister's voice came through the speaker, your attention immediately focused on it. “What’s the guy's name again?” Your hands went to your hips, shaking your head with a big grin. “Nope.” Her and your brother's groans caused static to come through the speaker.
“That’s so unfair, birdie. Mom knows!” You laughed at them. “The only reason mom knows is because she’s my emergency contact in case something happens while I’m gone. Not only that, but she wouldn’t know them anyways.” Her face reappeared, glasses sitting low on the bridge of her nose, peering at you from over the frame. 
As your siblings continued arguing with you, your mom spoke up over them. “Where are you going first, birdie?” Explaining the travel plans to her and where you were scheduled to touch down first, your siblings would jump in every once in a while to ask that you bring them a souvenir from that country you had just mentioned. 
Family was important to you. The guilt never subsiding at you moving halfway across the country to start your own life and leave your mom and siblings back home. You missed it. Them. Everything. But this was good for you. 
You recalled being teased growing up for not breaking out of your shell. For being too serious. Memories of older family members asking why you didn’t want to go play with the other kids in the playroom, teachers being shocked at your education levels, coworkers not believing your true age. 
They called you an old soul. You called it having to be an adult as a child. Taking on more responsibility than a kid ever should, but that’s what happens when “dad” skips town on the family. Someone has to step up and help. That fell to you. It carried behind you as you molded and shaped into a young adult and then an adult. All of your professional positions were too similar to what you grew up with.
Dealing with it for years was far too much. Leaving for college nearly killed you, but it was what you wanted. Needed. Each time you spoke to your mom, your heart would ache and guilt would seep into the cracks of your soul about leaving them there alone. 
It would never get easier. 
Standing at the curb at the airport, waiting for their van to arrive, an older woman, a man in his forties, and another younger man appeared next to your side. “You’re Joshua’s assistant, right?” Your eyes peeled from your screen to fully take her in as she spoke to you. She must’ve been at least in her fifties, wearing clothes you had seen your grandmother in nearly ten years ago, gaudy glass jewelry decorating her.
The older man was dressed like a typical dad, in fact, he more than likely was someone's dad. He had a notepad tucked under one arm and paper tickets in his hand that had your eyes nearly bugging out. The younger gentleman was dressed incredibly well, but refused to make eye contact with you.
Nodding with your eyes slightly squinted, you held your hand out to her to offer a shake as she continued. “It’s nice to finally meet you! I’m Patty, Samuel’s assistant. That one is Bob, Jacob’s assistant. The one on the far end is Monty, he is with Daniel.” A smile took over your face at her, trying to bite back a laugh. It seems that they had all picked each other's assistants for shits and giggles.
Based on what you knew of them, Sam got the older woman because she was going to drive him crazy. He had little to no patience. Bob was for Jake, basically a parent to babysit him on the tour to make sure he wouldn’t die. Monty was standoffish and seemingly an asshole by the way he eyed you as you stood there. Totally offsetting the easy going nature of Danny. 
What was the joke with you and Josh?
You had no time to dwell on it any longer because the van pulled up, you staying off to the side as Patty and Monty rushed to the van to grab their people. As each boy exited the vehicle, you gave a smile to each, chuckling as Sam flipped Danny off as Patty handed him sticky notes with her thoughts for him. 
Danny awkwardly stood in front of Monty as Monty did not utter a word to him, counting the bags that got off for him before turning and handing him the luggage tag and asking him if he had received the itinerary information he had sent last night.
Jake gave a seemingly large smile to Bob, feeling happy that at least one of them got along well enough with their assistant. They fell into easy chatter about his baggage and flights today. When his curly head was the last to exit, you gave a small wave to him, seeing his large smile take over his face when he saw you.
“Good morning, Mr. Kiszka. I already took care of your luggage with the curbside attendants so when they remove it from the van it will be tagged and moved. Your boarding pass should be on your Apple Wallet. I did get the TSA precheck done for us so that is one thing we won’t have to worry about the entire tour. Oh, and we also have global entry for the international aspect. Your seat is 24A, I am 26A, within reasonable distance so if you need anything just give me a shout.” 
His smile never faltered as you shot out all of that information to him, giving a shit eating grin to Sam, who looked like steam was about to cascade from his ears. As you both approached TSA with the group, the confused looks of everyone else as you two made your way to the precheck line was gold. 
“Hey, how’d you do that?” Danny grumbled, reaching the end of the line as you and Josh kept moving forward, Josh’s loud cackle echoing through the area. You two reached the gate with a laughable amount of time before the others. Scanning the area, you knew coffee was going to be needed in order to get through the long travel day ahead. 
“Starbucks is down that way.” You smiled at Josh, pulling out your phone to reload your app. “Thank you. What can I get for you?” He stretched, shaking his head and moving in the direction he had just motioned towards. “Oh no, I’ll go with you. We have a five hour flight ahead of us, before a two hour layover, and then another three hour flight. I need to be moving,” you nodded, the two of you walking towards the coffee shop in silence. 
He finally cleared his throat, obviously uncomfortable by the silence you were drenched in. “Have you ever been to Europe?” You shook your head, grabbing your wallet out of your bag as you two stood in line waiting for your turn, the app not working as your eyes remained locked to your screen. “Never traveled outside of California and Tennessee.” 
You thought you heard his jaw hit the floor at your admission. “You’re joking?” Fighting a smile, you shook your head again. “No. I never traveled with my previous bosses and if I did it was just inside state limits. I would take over their office responsibilities while they were gone wherever,” his hand rubbed at his jaw. 
“And nothing for personal travel?” Sighing and reading the menu, your head continued in the same motion. “Opportunity never presented itself.” You could tell he had a million questions, wanting to know all the details about it, but your saving grace was being called up next in line. 
He tried to start up again as you both stood to the side of the counter waiting for your orders to be called, but he was cut off by your personal phone ringing. You smiled seeing your mom’s photo take up your screen, turning your body away from him to quickly and quietly talk.
“Hey, I’m at the airport. Boarding starts in about twenty minutes. I’m waiting for coffee right now. Yes, I will text you. Okay. Okay. Okay. Bye, you too.” Slipping your phone back in your pocket, he had a smirk playing on his face. Your order was yelled out into the busy shop and as you grabbed it, his order right next to yours, you knew you weren’t going to be getting away from conversation with him. 
Josh was practically rocking on his heels, itching to speak as he sipped his tea. “Was that your mom?” His lighthearted tone had an excited, but jokey manner to it as you fought the urge to roll your eyes at him. “Yes.” What you could have sworn was a giggle came from his mouth, a large smile still plastered on his face.
“What’s her name? Tell me all about your mama.” He nudged you, eyes eager and hopeful that he was about to delve into your past and learn about you, even just a bit. Luckily, as you approached the gate, the gang was just arriving, all frazzled as boarding was due to begin in just a few minutes. 
Biting back laughter and sipping your coffee, Sam and Danny quickly approached you, handing their phones over, you looked at them confused. “Whatever you did to get you and Josh through, please do for us.”
Josh had approached the counter and when he came back over to you, flashed his screen towards you. “26B. Seat buddies!” You bit back a laugh and smile you could feel forcing its way on your face. He was going to be too damn much to handle. 
Why were you excited about it?
The first few weeks were a blur on the road. It was a life you had never experienced before. Going to bed in one city, working in another for twelve hours, and then repeating it over and over. The days all faded from one into another. 
It was enthralling. 
This was something you had thought of, envied others for actually doing. Never knowing what steps needed to be taken to get the plans in motion. Staring at plane tickets sitting in your checkout cart, waiting, begging to be purchased. To go someplace new, try something new, meet someone new. 
Now, it was happening. 
It was exhausting. 
You had never been so sleep deprived in your life. Between learning how to sleep in a bunk bed in a constantly moving bus, insanely late hours after shows had concluded, and being up to watch the sunrise more days than not, you were still trying to adjust. 
How long does it take someone to embrace and thrive on a new schedule? You were still trying to answer that. Learning the ins and outs of your boss was proving easier than you originally thought. Josh was a simple, but still a somewhat complex person. Being glued to his side for three weeks meant diving into the nitty gritty of who he is. 
His food choices were quite limited, not offering many options due to the restrictions he was under for his job. You figured he would consume quite a few adult beverages, but not near as many as you had witnessed so far. He required much needed destress and alone time that he would typically meditate or reflect during. Josh called his mom nearly every single day, even if it was just for a few minutes to chat and check in. While he had a phone and used it, it was nowhere to the extent of most people his age. He appreciated a good coffee and would do his best to find a new place to try in every city you found yourself in. He always invited you. 
Every chance he could, your name was slipping from his tongue, offering a spot for you to go with them to the bar they were going to be visiting after they finished performing. If he was venturing out to explore a city and wanted to visit a coffee shop, his eyes would fall to you, asking to be his company because everyone else was too hungover to be out that early. 
He had wormed his way in with you in ways you hadn’t even noticed, but he did. Being up somewhat early to sit with you in the bus, basking in the silence as you peered out the window in awe of whatever you were whizzing by. Sometimes working, he would remain somewhat silent, but always finding a way to bring some chatter between you both. All he wanted to do was learn more about you, spend time with you. That’s why he always extended invitation offers for anything he was going to do to you. 
At first, you politely declined each invitation. However, after one too many late nights working, you decided a walk to the coffee shop he described in immaculate detail sounded quite nice. A change of scenery from the inside of a tour bus or the same walls of a hotel room that you couldn’t identify out of a line up if your life depended on it was needed to keep your sanity in check. Josh literally jumped for joy right in front of you.
It elicited a laugh, which was not unusual. He had quite the knack for humor, people around him constantly clutching their sides from his jokes and quips. What made you laugh the most though, was his natural personality. He wasn’t afraid to be himself, no matter how ridiculous he appeared to others.
Admirable. 
“A large mocha please. Thank you,” as you reached to pay, Josh’s card slapped onto the reader, instantly paying for your coffee. Shooting him an unamused look, you grabbed your phone, Apple Paying him for the exact amount with a smile. 
Rolling his eyes at you, he placed his own order before accompanying you at the table you had sat at. He gave a large smile as he plopped into a chair across from you. Tilting his head ever so slightly, he took in the side of your face as you peered out to the street outside. Trying to place what city you had arrived in without being awake and present for it.
“Your nose twitches when you think,” you were startled by the voice breaking the silence you had been sitting in. Your eyes fell to the boy and slightly narrowed at him, a smirk tugging at your lips. “Does not.”
He shrugged, leaning back in his chair, still clad in loungewear, hair a poofy mess displaying he had in fact just rolled out of bed fifteen minutes ago and eyes set deep littered with exhaustion. “Do too. Oh, thank you so much, Maria!” Without another moment to respond, your coffee order was placed in front of you and the muffin you had been eyeing was there as well. Right in the middle of the table.
Knowing you didn’t place the order for the muffin, your eyes fell to the indifferent boy seated across from you as he brought the scalding liquid to his pursed lips. “Did you know her or something?” His brow furrowed, shaking his head as he set the mug back down, subconsciously pushing the plate towards you a bit more.
“No, why?” Shaking your head, you brought your own cup to your lips, eyes falling back to the bustling street outside. “You knew her name.” Still seeming confused by your response, his pinky finger continued to push the plate in your direction. “Her name tag was pinned to her shirt.” Nodding at his words, you fought a smile.
Of course he would actually call people by their names, even if they didn’t want it, which you could tell took the young girl aback. That’s such a Josh thing, you thought to yourself. The more you thought about it the more you realized that Josh always called everyone by their first names. Any chance he could, he would. You couldn’t count the amount of times you had heard him asking people for their names. 
And he always remembered. 
Josh picked at the muffin, popping a piece in his mouth, making a motion with his hand to you with expectant eyes. “I won’t eat it all. I mean don’t get me wrong it’s delicious, but too much sugar.” You fought the urge to roll your eyes, taking a piece of the crumble topping and placing it in your mouth.
Playing off how amazing it truly was, Josh’s lips fought off a beaming smile, a small victory in his books. It had been weeks together, every single day, countless hours, but he wasn’t making personal hedgeway with you. Professional? It was unreal how quickly you had caught on to his schedule and attuned your work to his. Personal? Not a damn inch. 
You ordered your coffee quietly, too quiet for him to hear the full order which was excluding him from being able to order it for you just once. He had no idea what, if any, family or friends you had other than your mom because you had no social media presence anywhere. Not the slightest inkling to what food you enjoyed more than others because when you ate it was opposite hours of him. Josh didn’t even know if you liked their music because you hadn’t attended one of their shows. Pre-show prep was far too hectic for you to pay attention to anything other than your duties and you slept while they performed, but were present again for post-show to ensure anything he needed was taken care of. Worst of all, he hadn’t figured out your favorite color because all you wore were neutral tones and all of your personal belongings you kept packed away so he never saw them.
It was driving him mad. 
In order for Josh to get along with someone he needed a connection. Anything. You were offering nothing. Even Danny was making moves with his assistant who was a complete asswipe. The woman who was old enough to be Sam’s grandmother acted like that. A grandmother. Jake basically had their dad on tour with them. But Josh?
Nothing. 
Your goal on the other hand was working just fine. Productivity was at an all time high, it was a side of life you never thought you would be able to live in let alone enjoy, and you got along just fine with your boss. 
Because that’s what he is. Your boss.
Was it difficult to continue hiding aspects of yourself and personality to keep the relationship with him strictly professional? Yes and no. Obviously you were giving some signs because you were munching on a blueberry muffin that you had thought you gave no indication that you truly wanted it. So of course there was some leeway, but otherwise it was working fine. 
In order for this to continue on the successful path it was, you needed to play by the rules. Did you generate those rules? Yes, since there were absolutely none laid out for you when you started, but rules were there for a reason. To ensure everyone carried on with their work in the most efficient way possible. 
Honestly, it seemed like it was the only way you were going to survive nearly a year on the road with them. If you started getting personal, it would only make it much more complicated and difficult to get work done. Keep emotions out of it.
That’s the key to success right there. Josh despised it while you thrived on it. 
In fact, Josh never played by the rules. Bed times didn’t exist, alarms were never set, naughty things spoken without a second thought, he was the literal definition of fuck it. Which you discovered the more time you spent around him and his siblings that he was the one that needed the most structure in his life. That’s where you come in.
Was that the reason you were selected for Josh? That was what Jake had said in your interview, but given the jokey nature of the others and their assistants there had to be something more.
Providing a daily routine, schedule, something to keep him going at an acceptable pace. Executing it in a way that he didn’t tend to notice, making him think that he was still playing by his own rules. No rules. It took some time to get used to at first, but now it was a piece of cake. As easy as could be. 
However, Josh was working you a bit, too. That’s why you were eating a muffin top, laughing with him about the mishap on stage from the night before that you weren’t there to see, but had heard all about it. He was going to crack you, he just had to make sure you wouldn’t notice it. 
The alarm went off on your phone just as you finished the last swig of your coffee, eyes going slightly wide at the message on your screen. “Alright, we need to head back. You have an interview with a magazine in forty-seven minutes with Danny and then we need to get you to sound check for the show tomorrow night because the venue is closed tomorrow morning. There was an issue with the manager and he can only be here today so it needs to get done today.” 
Josh’s deadpanned expression on his face let you know that he was not excited for what the day held in store for him. Sighing and tilting his chair back ever so slightly, he looked out the window, a smirk tugging at his lips. “Let’s make a deal?” Shaking your head at his words, you placed your empty cup on top of the plate that now only held remnants of the muffin you had split with him. 
Did you split it? Or did you eat it all? No, you could’ve sworn he ate some, too. Are the dress pants you needed pressed on top of the black suitcase or tan suitcase? Josh’s jumpsuit should be back from the cleaners today, Jake’s suit should be, too. Make a note to call the cleaners and check on that. 
“Unless the deal is getting back to the hotel within the next ten minutes and making you look presentable for the interview, the answer is a resounding no. You need to wash your hair today, by the way.” He groaned like a teenager being asked to take the trash out, head thrown back, adam's apple bobbing as the noise escaped him, arms crossed over his chest. 
Grumbling as he finally stood from the table and following you out the entrance back in the direction you had come from. Never asking what the deal was, the afternoon went without a hitch. The interview was quick and efficient, sound check practically the same, you found yourself laying on the bed in your hotel room, eyes drifting shut as the air conditioner rumbled to life. 
You could feel yourself slowly falling into the warm embrace of sleep, teetering on the edge of a blissful nap until your next alarm would go off signaling it was time to get back to your responsibilities. The pounding at your door had your eyes flying open, your body sitting upright on the mattress and turning towards where the noise had emitted from.
Tilting one head to the side and feeling some of the tension in your neck release, you pulled the door open to see a frazzled Jake standing on the other side with a twin in tow. Before Jake had even spoken, Josh shot you a truly apologetic look. “I can’t find my suit anywhere. We leave for the venue in twenty minutes and I have no idea where it’s at. I swear to god if it’s lost I’m going to lose my mind. I’ve been calling and texting you, are you not near your phone?”
Your brain was trying to catch up with how quickly he was speaking and process the information he was feeding to you. Josh’s hands went to his hips, shooting daggers at his brother, but took a deep breath to calm himself down before exploding on him.
“Relax. We’re gonna find it,” you fought the urge to rub at your eyes, grabbing your phone from your back pocket and seeing that you had nearly thirty missed calls and texts from all of the brothers and assistants. The hairs on the back of your neck stood to attention, feeling dread pounding into you when you realized how long you had been asleep and that you had missed all of these messages from your boss. 
“Jake, your suit? It was with the cleaners and I had them deliver it directly to the venue so we didn’t have to transport it. I always have Josh’s jumpsuits taken directly to the venue so we don’t have to worry about it and I had the same done for yours. I apologize for not informing you about that. I am also so sorry for missing all of your calls and texts. I fell asleep and didn’t realize how long I had been out. It won’t happen again, Mr. Kiszka.” You could see Jake’s shoulders instantly release the tension he had been holding onto at your words, a small breath of air escaping through tight lips.
Josh’s intense glare never left his sibling, stance still the same as it was. “Apologize to her now.�� Your eyes went wide, instantly going to say otherwise and how it wasn’t necessary, putting the blame solely on yourself. Your boss's hand came up, halting you before you could speak up. 
“No, no. He absolutely owes you an apology. You asked her to take care of your suit because Bob was incapable of finding a good cleaner and she did. I don’t appreciate you treating her like you are. She was resting, she is allowed to do that because her services were not needed for,” he checked his phone for a fleeting moment, “sixteen minutes. She and I have a system in place and if you would occasionally like her assistance, you need to treat her how she deserves to be treated. Apologize. Now.” Standing there positively gobsmacked and unsure what you were supposed to be doing in that moment, you watched as Jake’s jaw set. 
A small expulsion of air left his nostrils as he turned to you, clearly unhappy with what his brother was forcing him to do. “My apologies. I was not aware of the process with Josh’s wardrobe and I shouldn’t have spoken to you in that way and made assumptions like I did. Forgive me.” You nodded fervently, hands clasped together in front of your body, nearly refusing to make eye contact with him. 
“Of course. My communication should have-” Josh’s hand went up again, shaking his head and cutting you off. “Absolutely not. Jake is aware of the process and it slipped his mind. You did everything right. Jake, go.” His twin filed out of the room, not looking your way again as he left.
The heavy hotel door shut behind him and in what can only be described as a word vomit, you quickly spoke. “I am so sorry. I don’t know what happened, I thought I just closed my eyes for a second and I have no idea how the vibrations of my phone didn’t wake me up. I assumed he knew that his suit would be delivered to the venue and I shouldn’t have made that assumption.” 
Josh’s sincere smile took over his features, waving you off. “Don’t worry about it. He’s being an ass because he and his girlfriend haven’t fucked in weeks and they’re fighting. He’ll give you an actual apology in a day I promise.” 
That was the first time he had stood up for you. It wasn’t the last either. Tough spats between siblings often turned to their assistants when in bad and annoyed moods. It was expected with how much time they were spending with each other.
What wasn’t expected was every time another assistant, crew member, or sibling tried speaking in a way that was anything but friendly to you had irked Josh in a way that had him standing up for you in any way he could. Everyone knew to only step on toes once because Josh would set the record straight thereafter. 
You weren’t sure how to feel about it. In this line of work, it was almost part of the job description to be treated subpar. Not in Josh’s job description. He was so grateful that over the first half of the tour you had been so amazing with anything and everything that this job could encompass, he felt it completely necessary to defend you. 
Compared to the others, you were a literal saint. You never strayed from your job and its responsibilities. He hardly ever caught you on your personal device and when he did, you were wrapping up a call with someone who he could only assume was your mother. Your entire life revolved around him. Of course he was going to stand up for you. 
His siblings teased him relentlessly for it. They said it was incredibly obvious he was in love with you. Entirely enamored with you. Sam claimed he had caught him on more than one occasion just watching you. 
His favorite tale was at a winery in Italy. You stood off to the side of the tour group, a wonderful sundress lightly fluttering in the breeze, sunglasses alternating from resting on the bridge of your nose to the top of your head, your skin glowing from the late summer sun. Sam and Danny nudged each other, snickering as they watched their brother. They said Josh stared at you with his jaw slightly agape for nearly fifteen minutes. 
Was he taken aback by seeing your bare shoulder for the first time? The puffy sleeve of your dress resting on the tops of your biceps. The neckline dipping dangerously low over the curve of your chest. A single gold necklace with a dangling pendant of your zodiac sign resting soundly against you. The dress hem resting midcalf, the most leg he had ever seen from you. He was just surprised is all. 
That’s all. Nothing more.
Did he think about that afternoon for the next month straight? How smooth your skin would be under his fingertips, igniting and bristling as he traced every curve and committed every feature to memory. What kind of reaction would happen if you started with secret touches shared amongst one another. What you would do if his hand found home on your hip in front of everyone. How you would respond to him maneuvering your head to the side, allowing him unrestricted access to the large expanse of bare skin, goosebumps erupting as his breath fanned along your neck. Of course not. Anyways, he would never admit it to anyone if he did.
Which he didn’t. 
It didn’t matter because in his mind you were in no way shape or form interested in something like that with him. No, you only viewed him as a boss. Your boss. The boss. It’s why you refused to divulge any information about yourself to him. 
Sure, after the incredulous amount of time you had spent together, he was going to find out some things about you. Like how easy it was to make you laugh. He had a knack for it somehow because when Sam tried telling you jokes they almost always fell flat. That you were a diagnosed insomniac and he could almost always find you up in the middle of the night with a sheepish grin as you read a book. Oh, and that you adored trashy literature. Your book fell from your bunk and when he picked it up to put it back, his eyes widened at the utter filth adorning the page. His cheeks burned crimson for the next week whenever he looked at you. 
But that was about all. It was killing you.
The more you got to know Josh and the more time spent together, all you wanted to do was share some personal things with him. Instead, you fed tiny insignificant tidbits about yourself to him to not only keep him at bay, but you as well. That you loathed socks, were an avid watcher of Star Wars and all franchise shows, and that you preferred tote bags to actual purses. 
You highly doubted he even remembered those things about you, but deep down you knew he did. It meant too much to him to not. Each time he would ask you to accompany them on a night out, it was growing more and more difficult to turn it down. The more time you spent with him, which was nearly every waking minute, all you wanted to do was spend time with him in a nonprofessional setting.
That’s not good. That was what you knew would tip the scales and everything you had been working towards, every boundary you had set, would be out the window. Being on the road was proving to be a lot lonelier than you had originally assumed. 
Of course, there was some basic understanding that because of the limits you had put in place with the band that social interaction on a more personal level would be dimmed, you didn’t think it would be quite like this. With the few lonesome hours that you did experience, while it was a blissful and welcome break, you found yourself longing for someone to share the time with.
Why was your mind wandering to Josh? You spent the most time with him. That’s why. No other reason. Imagining tracing the slope of his nose with the tip of your finger. How his plush lips would feel against the pulse of your neck. Teeth nipping at the skin and soothing it with his tongue right after. 
Knock it off!
It was rare. Having three days off in a row. No interviews, no sound checks, no duties that had to be taken care of during that span of time. Where better to have that happen than in France. It was actual heaven. 
Many moons ago, one of your closest friends from high school had gone off to college and during one of her years, had taken the opportunity to study abroad. You can recall spending hours on the phone with her listening in great detail to her tales and trying to picture yourself doing what she had done. Of course, a majority of those things you could never do, but one small story had stuck with you through the years.
She had described a small village in France, an incredibly sleepy town that was the quietest place she had ever been to. The food was indescribable, the city was phenomenal with mainly mom and pop shops, and overlooking the ocean from anywhere you could look in the town. You had been fantasizing and daydreaming about this village since she had told you.
Now, it was your turn to be there. Waking up with the sun, getting ready as silently as possible as to not wake anyone up, and trying to sneak out of the hotel room. You thought you were golden until you heard your name leave his lips. You jumped with a start, hand landing over your heart. “Jesus! Mr. Kiszka, good morning.” 
His smile never diminished, eyes squinting at you being fully dressed this early in the morning. On a non-work day. “Good morning to you, too. Where are you off to this early in the am? Running off and leaving us all behind?” You gave a tight lipped smile, letting the hotel room door fully close behind you, your back connecting with the wood. 
Checking the time on your phone, you knew you needed to get a move on. “Since it is my day off, yes I am.” Josh shrugged, bottom lip lightly pushing out as his eyes fell downcast, a sigh following. “Oh okay. Well we’ll be around here if you need anything. Don’t think we’re doing anything today really. Just wandering around. Anyways, yeah I’ll have my phone on me if you need anything. Just give me a call or text. Whatever.” Guilt was worming its way into your gut as you watched his mood continue to sour, sighing quietly and checking your phone again.
“If you can be dressed and ready within ten minutes you can come with me. If you’d like,” his head snapped up at you, eyes bright with excitement. He calmed down, cheeks turning a light pink as he turned from your smirking gaze. “I wouldn’t want to intrude on your day off. You spend enough time with me as is.” 
There was that feeling again. 
Against your better judgment, it came tumbling from your lips before you could stop it. “No, I would love it if you would come. Really,” your smile grew at the end, seeing how excited he truly was to hear you say that. He was practically bouncing in his spot, joy seeping from him in waves. 
“If you insist! Let me just change super quickly and grab some stuff and then we’ll go.” You nodded, standing there waiting for the boy to reappear from the room directly next to yours. Nerves pummeled you, constantly checking over your shoulder to see if anyone was going to slip out of their own room and see you waiting for Josh. It was entirely ridiculous, he was your boss. No one would even bat an eye at it, but there was something screaming inside of you that this was going to be a bad decision. 
That something was going to shift today that you wouldn’t be able to take back. Maybe that’s what you wanted.
You didn’t have much time to dwell because he came bounding out of the room, green jumpsuit adorning his slight frame, hair a wild untamed ball, camera resting soundly on his arm. Josh’s eyes that once held your own fell down to where your gaze was currently sitting and he beamed at you. 
“I take it the jumpsuit was a good call?” You returned the smile, shaking your head as you began walking down the hallway. “Oh, of course. It’s just that’s what you were wearing during our first meeting. The color suits you very well, Mr. Kiszka.” He groaned as you entered the elevator together, turning to fully face you as it began its trek downwards. 
He placed both hands in a prayer formation, landing right under his chin, large eyes peering into yours. “Please call me Josh. While it’s just us today, okay? I won’t tell anyone. It won’t damage your resume, promise. Today, it’s Josh, alright?” You battled within yourself, gnawing on the inside of your cheek, forcing your mouth open, teeth sank into your bottom lip.
Eyes traveling up to connect with his once more, you let out a large sigh. “Just today. Okay, Josh?” He almost fell over as his name left your lips for the first time. In fact, he had no idea how to respond. Only nodding, swallowing thickly, he turned away from you, standing barely a hair from one another, his widened eyes stared at the elevator doors as they parted for you both.
His knuckles were stark white from the grip he had on the wooden railing that was around the entire metal box. Reluctantly letting go, he watched as you waltzed out into the lobby, second guessing every decision leading to this moment.
What the fuck had he done? 
The train ride to the town began as any other day would for the two of you. First, talking about the upcoming week and what it would entail work wise. Second, about what food Josh was hoping to find wherever you were going to be going. Third, Josh fiddling with his camera and talking nonstop to fill the silence that would linger between you both. 
You had gone through the motions within the first fifteen minutes. Then you did something entirely unexpected. 
“When we get there, can you help me find an antique shop or something like that? I haven’t gotten a gift for my sister yet and she’ll kill me if I don’t,” you chuckled at the end, peering out the window and taking in the majestic scenery zooming by. When Josh didn’t respond, you turned your attention over to him to see a blank expression sitting on his face. A complete deer in the headlights moment.
Your brow furrowed before realizing you had given him a fact of your life without even catching it. He cleared his throat, trying to redeem himself and play it cool, but he was about to bounce off the walls. “Sur-absolutely. How old is she?” He wasn’t holding eye contact, but you knew what he was doing. 
Fighting a smile, you turned back towards the window, chin resting on your palm. “She and my brother are twins. They are fourteen. I found something for him a while ago, but nothing for her.” Josh couldn’t contain his utter joy any longer. His hand went to his chest, pointing at himself. “Jake and I are twins!” 
Pretending to be shocked, you played into it. “Shut up! No way! I had no idea,” he rolled his eyes at your sarcasm, but a giggle flitted from him as his cheeks grew rosier by the minute. “Yeah yeah whatever. What does she like?”
You filled him in on all the details of your siblings, never revealing their names, the rest of the ride there. When you stepped off the train and got in a cab to get to the little town, and realization of where you were slammed into you, you couldn’t fight the tears that welled in your eyes.
Getting out of the car, it was like a burden had been lifted from your shoulders. The smell of the sea wafting through the air. The cobblestone streets that you had only dreamed of seeing and walking on. The locals carried on with their daily lives, where they were being of little importance to them. To you it was everything. 
It was the life you had dreamed of living. That once seemed so unobtainable, but now you were living it. Having escaped from the hellscape of childhood and young adulthood. Everything you had worked towards. It was here. 
A hand landed in between your shoulder blades, the cool skin signaling to whom it was pressed against the bare skin there. Offering a small smile to him, his worried look was plastered on his features. “You okay?” Taking in a deep breath, your smile continued to grow as you nodded in response.
“Never been better.” His face lit up at your words, immediately leading you towards the city center to start the day. Arm never leaving you, you wrapped your own through the crook of his elbow. Josh’s eyes nearly falling out of his head at the contact you offered him.  
It truly was one of the best days of your life. Sides ached from the amount of laughter shared between you two. Stories were given to one another about the tales of adventures shared with friends and family. Walking so close to each other you swore you could feel the goosebumps rise on his skin with each brush of your arm. 
Comfortable. Delightful. Electric. 
The sun was beginning to dip below the horizon. The rays glistening and dancing on the ever moving water below it. Casting everything in its touch with hues of orange and pink. Complimenting all creatures with the sun kissed glow. The restaurant seated for amazing views of the coast. 
Sipping from your cocktail glass, you and Josh were cackling into them, earning stares from those occupying the tables around you. The view was breathtaking and you couldn’t help that your eyes would continue to wander to it whenever an opportunity presented itself. A lag in the conversation meant your smile was permanently stuck to your face, one of the best moods you had ever been in holding strong on you. The day had been beyond what you had dreamed of. 
The company wasn’t too bad either.
“Craziest thing you’ve ever done?” Snapping out of your own thoughts, you turned towards the boy seated across from you, hands folded on the table as he leaned towards you. Sighing with a shrug, you took another sip of your cocktail, shaking your head. “Good try.” 
He groaned, slightly leaning back into his seat, nearly giving up before he gave a hefty shrug of his shoulders. “Yeah I figured. It was worth a shot though. I’ve pushed my limits with you today. Not only that, but you’re a complete goody two shoes.” It was at that moment something clicked in you. 
After being so cold towards Josh for so unbearably long, just trying to keep things on a professional level, he had hardly ever pushed you to share information you weren’t comfortable with. Sure, he would annoy the hell out of you to find out any information he could, but he knew boundaries and didn’t push them. 
And you despised being called a goody two shoes.
“I took my moms car when I was a senior in high school and drove to Las Vegas with my friends during senior ditch day. My friend had gotten us fake ids and we used them to gamble what little money we had in the casinos and get drinks. We ended up so plastered we had to get a room for the night and put it on one of my friends credit cards. My mom thought I was just staying at her house for the weekend. That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever done. Oh, and I was high for a majority of the time.” Your eyes were squinted in his direction, challenging him, trying to read his reaction, his jaw hanging slack.
Who’s the goody two shoes, now?
He blinked multiple times, trying to come back to his senses before shaking his head, a loud laugh shaking his entire body. “Holy fuck! That’s actually insane. Did your mom notice the miles on the car?” Finishing off your drink, you thought about that. “You know, I actually don’t know. If she did she never said anything about it. I never acted out or did anything so I think she was just happy I went and did something fun, but those days are behind me. One and done you know? She always used to say that her birdie needed to learn how to fly. I think that was her way of letting me,” Josh’s soft smile warmed you from your head to your toes, spreading throughout every limb, settling low in your stomach.
Tilting his head at you, his smile grew. “Birdie. Is that your nickname?” Your cheeks grew hot, not even noticing that you had let that slip. Only nodding in response, he winked at you. “I love that. It’s so,” his eyes continued to watch over you as his smile grew, “you.” You didn’t know how to respond, not knowing if it was a compliment or not, but Josh continued on. 
“Mine is nothing like that. Growing up in the midwest, underage drinking was the norm. It was how we passed time. Mine’s dumb compared to yours. I went skinny dipping once and got my clothes stolen by my brother. Had to walk over a mile home butt ass naked. At least it was summer though,” you were laughing so hard you had tears streaming down your face, trying to catch your breath.
Josh rolled his eyes at you, face burning bright red, arms crossed over his chest. “Yeah yeah yeah, whatever.” As you settled down, wiping at your face with your napkin, you felt a sense of boldness wash over you, speaking before you could think twice about it. “I’ve always wanted to skinny dip.” 
It was like flipping a switch. Watching as his eyes turned from one of joking to instantaneous mischief. Setting your now empty glass on the table, you began fervently shaking your head and a continuous chorus of no’s left your mouth. He nodded, entirely ignoring you and quickly standing from the table, the bill paid over an hour ago.
Dragging you through the streets, laughter bouncing off the surrounding buildings, you couldn’t catch your breath as his hand held a firm grasp on your arm. His chilly hand clamped to your forearm, grip never relenting despite the tiny fight you were putting up to actually escape from him. 
Unsure of where he was leading you, your head was on a swivel, trying to place your location, but it didn’t seem to matter because Josh seemed to know this place like the back of his hand despite never having been here before. When a small lake appeared, your laughter died down to giggles as you peered at the boy.
“How the hell did you know this was here?” A sheepish smile took over his face, cheeks going rosy as he bashfully kicked his leg around. “Walked by it earlier. Do you not remember that?’ You tried thinking back to earlier in the day when you would have made your way by this, but when you were about to say you truly didn’t it dawned on you.
Your mouth fell open and your palm landed on your forehead. “Oh! That’s right. We were going to the, the, the-” you were snapping your fingers, trying to place where you were heading before Josh cut you off, “the patisserie.” Your smile grew thinking back to the chocolate concoction you had consumed just hours before. 
Sitting on the grass with a sigh, you felt elated. “Thank you for coming with me. Seriously, I think you made the day ten times more fun than I would have ever had by myself.” He took the spot next to you, stretching his legs out with a groan, knee nearly knocking with your own, resting his arms behind him. “You’re just saying that. Trying to get in my good graces. I know your tricks,” laughter fell from you both as you nudged him with your shoulder.
“Damn right. Better give me a great performance review,” you two fell into a comfortable silence as the sun finally disappeared, only basking the area in a gracious moonlight that seemed to illuminate the entire area, reflecting perfectly off the calm lake water. 
Josh was nervous. He kept playing with his lips. Teeth nipping at them, tongue darting out over them, sucking them into his mouth. The last thing he wanted to do was to ruin a perfectly fantastic day by frightening you off, but he had a feeling he wouldn’t do that. “Alright, what’s up?” You turned your head to look straight at him, catching him off guard as you did. Smile never faltering, trying to get him to relax.
Why was he freaking out? You watched as his eyes wandered your features, knowing exactly where he was going. That’s why he was freaking out.
You weren’t. 
This is your only chance to do something like this. Who better to do it with than Josh? Don’t be a coward. Just do it.
Standing from your spot, Josh’s fuzzy brows drew together as he monitored your movements. Stepping out of the sandals you had worn, undoing the zipper on the side of your dress, you watched as Josh’s eyes grew as wide as saucers, truly rivaling the moon. He started to stutter, sticking his hand out to stop you from stepping out of the fabric.
“Oh my god, no no. I was totally joking,” you beamed down at his nearly frightened features, skin burning at the contact of his fingers wrapped around your wrist. “I wasn’t. I’ve always wanted to skinny dip. Either you can join me or you can watch or you can turn around and face the trees to not see me,” with his hand still around your wrist, you finished removing the dress from your figure. 
It fell in a pool around your feet, eye contact never breaking with him. Watching his adam's apple bob in his throat, breath stuttering, hands having a slight tremble. He was terrified to look down, to see you in a light he hadn’t before.
Standing only in your panties and bra, your breathing was more even than you anticipated. It felt right. Like this was meant to be happening. Here. With him. 
It feels right.
Walking away from him, your hands went behind your back, unclasping your bra, the straps fell down your arms. Tossing it to the side, you stopped on the edge of the water. Taking a deep breath, you lifted one leg, stepping out of the panties and removing them from your boiling skin.
It took every ounce of courage you had to turn your head over your shoulder and look to the stunned boy still sitting in the grass. The moonlight was basking you in an aura he had only dreamed of. Turning to stone as he sat mesmerized by your utter beauty, unsure of what he should have been doing at that exact moment.
The question answered for him as your singsong voice rang out into the still air. “Are you coming or what, Josh?” Realizing at that second that he wasn’t dreaming, that you were real and standing before him in the way you were was almost too much to handle. 
Moving to autopilot he hastily stood, undoing the buttons of his jumpsuit, leaving the article of clothing right next to yours. Watching in awe as you moved into the water, laughter and giggles flitting out into the night. 
As he became fully nude, you had turned in the water, letting it approach your chin, monitoring every movement that he made. Despite every time you had thought about this moment, the nerves you thought would be coursing through you, it wasn’t like that at all. 
Basking in comfort, enthralled that you were doing this with him, contentment with how the day had gone. What a beautiful way to end the day.
Swimming out to meet you in the lake, his teeth chattered, the cool water embracing you both despite the sweltering temperatures that the day had held. Your hair was drenched, the water droplets dripping down your face as you beamed at him.
“Thank you for doing this with me. Total bucket list thing right now,” he laughed, moving slightly closer to you as he did. “I’m glad I could be here to influence you in this way. Time for you to act out a little. How does it feel?” His excited eyes greeted yours, truly interested in your response.
Something changed in that instant. The giggles had died down, instead a heat had replaced it. Your smile didn’t falter, but you felt a more serious nature take over. Nodding your head in response, you crept closer to him, your voice whispering out into the air between you both.
“Really good.” Josh felt it too. An intensity he hadn’t been expecting. One that he felt you were acting on, wanting to embrace this. With him. 
Deciding to not let logic and rules define you in that moment, you closed the gap between you two. It was incredibly soft, gentle, exploratory. His tender lips cradled yours, hardly applying any force. Afraid that if he pushed too hard it would scare you off.
Letting your arms circle around his neck, your bodies connected, igniting every nerve ending you had. Josh’s hands splayed across the bare expanse of your back, leaving the water with a splash as he held you for the first time.
Deepening the kiss, your mouth opened for him, letting your tongues brush against each other. Unable to hold in the small whimper at the blissful feeling, Josh took that as a positive sign. 
You were needing this, craving this, just as much as he had been. When he felt your fingers tangle in his damp locks and lightly scratch his scalp, tugging right after, he pulled you closer to him. There was little space left, but he wanted none. 
Noses hitting, breathing growing heavier, Josh’s hands moved from your back to under your legs. The underside of your thighs were gripped by his fingertips, motioning for you to wrap your legs around his waist. 
Immediately, you did. The tip of his cock brushed against your bare core, eliciting a strong gasp from you. Just the small contact had you desperate for more, butterflies filling your lower stomach, heat coursing through you. 
Your skin was positively on fire, never wanting this contact with him to end. As Josh went to exit the lake, you still wrapped securely around him, you quickly detached. 
Moving to where your clothes were haphazardly thrown onto the grass, you grabbed both items and laid them out for you to lay on, some barrier between you and the ground. When you were on your back, staring up at the boy whose gaze was one you had never experienced before, it was unlike anything you had ever seen before.
The moonlight held him in such a gorgeous glow, illuminating his wet and glistening skin. His hair was dropping into his eyes, but his veiny hand pushed the locks out of his line of sight, not wanting anything obstructing his view of you. Dazzling smile greeting you, lips darker than normal due to the chill he felt and the nature of which they had just been involved in. The droplets falling off of his skin onto you below him cause a sense of jealousy to erupt in him. How unfair that they were able to touch you and be one with you when he couldn’t. He didn’t want to waste any time with you, dipping his head down and connecting your lips once again.
Your budded nipples were achingly hard under his hands. They tweaked and teased you, back arching into his grasp, positively desperate for more from him. With each movement he did, you could feel him brushing against you.
It was driving you mad. Your hips were bucking to connect with his. Stilling as his lips suckled around one of your breasts, a shaky moan attempting to escape your throat. He matched his motions on the other, never neglecting the opposite as he did.
His lips landed in the valley between your breasts, placing deep, chaste kisses down your sternum, stomach, hips, and thighs. Hands held firm to your waist, not wanting you to slip away from him. Terrified that this was a far too realistic dream. Where he would wake up like a horny teenage boy after a wet dream.
Yet as his eyes connected with yours, breath fanning across your core, he knew it was reality. Flattening his tongue on your core, your head fell back. Back arching off the ground as he began eating you like a starved man.
Like this was all he needed to survive. What he had been fantasizing about. Trying to imagine the taste of you, nothing could even compare to what was landing on his tastebud’s. Eyes rolling into the back of his head, the sounds coming from you stirred him on. 
Wanting nothing more than to taste your release on him, he lapped at you, sucking your bundle of nerves into his mouth and holding it there, sending you over the edge into a mumbling mess.
When he came back up face to face with you, the tears that escaped from the corners of your eyes worried him at first, but quickly diminished as your hands landed behind his ears, dragging you to him. Teeth nearly clacking together, his breathing grew more uneven.
Your hand went between your bodies, leading his throbbing cock to your soaked entrance. Connecting your eyes once more, he wanted to be sure. Not wanting to taint anything between you both. 
“Are you sure?” Not a moment of hesitation, you responded with a breathless yes, sealing it with a small peck. Josh couldn’t wait a second longer, letting his tip enter you. Taking it inch by inch, you welcomed him with no fight. 
Josh’s pace was slow and deep, wanting to savor this. As your legs hiked around his waist, your lips never parted with each other. Pants and moans mixing together, breathing the other in, head dizzy with arousal.
You had never felt so welcomed and embraced with someone as you had with him. This was everything you had been thinking about since you had first seen him. Knowing him, growing closer with him, anything with him. 
He made you feel wanted and despite all your attempts of keeping him out, keeping him complacent, it was all for not. Josh was a force that you couldn’t fight, didn’t want to fight. Wanting to fall into him, let him know you inside and out, it was pointless to go against it.
But you had to. Just not at that moment. No, in this moment you could accept it, envelop in it, rejoice in it. Letting him treat you like the almighty being he wanted to. Walls crashing down for just a bit. Right now, it was all about you two mingling together. 
White hot heat flashed behind your eyes, body contracting as your orgasm flooded your senses. Tense muscles crushing Josh to you as he emptied out in you momentarily after you. His body shook with pleasure, whimpers falling against your lips as you attempted to catch your breath. To come back down from the intensity of the evening.
Savoring in the closeness for now. For now. 
The train ride back into the city was incredibly peaceful. You sat next to Josh the entire ride home, head resting on his shoulder, drifting in and out of sleep after he whispered to you that it was too late to be up and to rest. 
So, you did. At one point, his own head rested on your own, his warm cheek pressed against the crown of your head, his breath spanning across the top of your hair. When you woke up and saw both of your fingers entangled together, you almost didn’t want to reclaim your own hand. It felt right. 
It shouldn’t have.
That’s why the moment you stepped off the train, it was a sense of dread sitting heavy on you. It was like everything and anything that could have changed, did. Stepping towards your hotel room door, Josh’s hand gripped your waist, spinning you back towards him and colliding his lips with yours.
You didn’t fight, argue, try to stop it. Sinking into it, him. Letting your lips mesh together in a way that was a sense of comfort and security. Him letting you know that this was where you were meant to be. Something you had never felt before. You didn’t want to feel it. You couldn’t. 
That’s why when you two separated, him going into his room and you yours, you laid flat on the bed, staring at the ceiling. Tears slowly trickled from the corners of your eyes, hand clamping down over your mouth to silence any noise that could have been coming from you. 
You had known it from the minute you had seen him. It was going to end poorly. If you were anything other than extremely professional, setting firm boundaries, not allowing him any way in, it was going to end up a complete shit storm.
It was on the horizon. The gorgeous skies that seemed as though they were hand painted by the most talented artist you had ever seen before the black clouds would roll in, wreaking havoc on anything in its way. You were slowly watching it morph and change the aura around you. 
He had captivated you, drawn you in so quickly. The most interesting being you had ever encountered. Wickedly talented beyond measure. A careful and caring being, wanting to cause no harm, only leaving a trail of happiness and good behind him. He did. 
Staying away from him and the true being he was, was torture. He wanted to know you, see you, embrace you. Love you. You could feel it, see it in his eyes. The way he admired you, gazed at you, he just didn’t want to frighten you off. 
This had to be the only encounter that you experienced with him. Anything more would mangle and wreck you both. This was already going too far too fast. 
Hearing and feeling the vibrations of your phone, you tried to ignore it given the incredibly late hour, but decided that if it was work related you needed to answer. Grabbing the device and seeing your moms photo filling up the screen you groaned, knowing you were in no condition to speak with her, but remembering that it was a rare chance when you could actually talk to her. 
“Hi mom!” You tried to sound as cheery as you could, knowing your mom bought it when her chipper voice echoed out into the room. “My birdie girl! How is my little globetrotter? Are you working hard? Have you been eating? What time is it there? Are you supposed to be sleeping right now?” She left little room between her sentences to give an actual response, but as you answered her plethora of questions, you felt your chest growing tighter, knowing that morning was growing closer and closer. 
You made a decision that night. Carry on like normal. Act like nothing had happened and continue on with life, living like one of the best nights of your life had actually never occurred. A figment of your imagination. No matter how bad it hurts. 
He was waiting for you the next morning, bright and early knowing you were going to go for a little walk. It scared the ever loving shit out of you, jumping nearly ten feet in the air. “Jesus! You have got to stop doing that,” you chuckled, hand landing over your heart.
“Apologies. I was just thrilled to see you this fine morning,” and he truly looked as though he was. His eyes were slightly hooded as he peered at you. Cheeks a light pink. Hair somewhat smoothed down, but still a disheveled mess. Same outfit adorned as always. 
Your pulse was a million miles a minute as the smell of his cologne flooded your senses. Needing to nip this in the bud and quickly, you spoke up. “That’s very nice of you, Mr. Kiszka. I should be back around eleven this morning. If you need anything in the meantime please feel free to text me.” Offering as pleasant of a smile as you could, you watched as he rolled his eyes.
“I thought we were past that.” Your brows quirked, trying to play the part of not understanding why the nature of your relationship would have changed. “Mr. Kiszka, with all due respect, you are still my boss. What happened last night was out of line for both of us and I think that we should act as though it didn’t happen. Please.” 
Your eyes held his stare, seeing the expression of bewilderment take over his features. “Are you joking?” Shaking your head, he moved away from you, staring as though you had scorned him. Perhaps you had. “I thought-I thought that we had made some serious progress yesterday. That we were moving in a better direction for us,” his hand moved between you two. 
You fought the nerves vibrating in you as you stood strong. “I apologize if that’s the message I displayed to you yesterday, but no. I would prefer if we could remain the same. Strictly professional.” His jaw hung slack, eyes growing wider at your words.
His hands rubbed at his eyes, a harsh laugh escaping his lips. “This has got to be some sort of fucking joke. Birdie, I cannot just forget what happened yesterday!” You winced at his tone, hearing the intensity setting in it. “I know it meant a lot for you, too. Don’t pretend like it didn’t.” 
He was reading you and he was doing it well. Sighing, despite every instinct in you screaming to just fall into it, let it happen between you two, you continued to hold strong. “No. I apologize for letting things get too far.” 
Staring at you in utter disbelief, every emotion displayed across his face. “So that’s it? Not even friends?” Hesitating, only briefly, you shook your head. He wasted no time, pushing past you and going back into his hotel room.  
The rest of the day was spent miserable alone. Wandering the streets until eleven, just as you had stated, was unenjoyable. Your mind was rushing, wondering if any chance of a normal relationship with him had gone out the window. 
Regret. 
Standing in the lobby the next morning, you were exhausted. Hardly having slept the night before didn’t matter when you needed to work. Waiting for the group to emerge with their own luggage in tow, ready to head to the next location. It was best to use one of the free days for a travel day. It got you there sooner and gave you an extra day to explore a new place. 
They were easy to spot and hear, their own assistants and other tour employees following in tow. You offered a tight lip smile, clutching your planner to your chest, breath stuttering in your throat. You had to do this. 
It was the only thing that would make this work. Stick to the plan. Don’t give up. It’ll go back to how it was. 
“Good morning, Mr. Kiszka. I have already emailed you the travel itinerary for the day, there is a coffee waiting for you in the van, and I did find you an extra phone charger since your last one was left behind.” A light joking tone came with your words, but as you spoke, Josh’s smile diminished the second he laid eyes on you.
This wasn’t what he was expecting. At all. Despite you having agreed that calling him by his first name was just for the lone day, he thought that after what had happened, you would continue to do it. That the cold and steely demeanor you had been using with him since the start was cracked and gone. He felt stupid. Used. 
Wrecked that what progress he had thought he had made with you would bring some sense of change. That you would feel more comfortable with him. Possibly even returning the feelings he had been fostering and harboring for you. Ridiculous. 
Only murmuring a thank you under his breath, he walked away from you quickly and towards the van. You sighed, eyes briefly closing as your thoughts swirled in your head. 
This was for the best. He’d get over it.
Turns out that Josh holds a grudge a lot better than you assumed he would. For such a cheery and pleasant person, you truly didn’t expect him to continue to practically give you the silent treatment for weeks. He refused to hold eye contact with you, only spoke to you for pressing work matters, the whole shebang. 
Thinking that this would make it easier, better even. Him only giving what you did on a daily basis. It was the total opposite. It was miserable. You dreaded getting up in the morning and having to deal with work matters. 
The following few weeks, you were at the lowest you had ever felt. Never having had a close relationship with a boss before, let alone what you two had done and said to one another, proved that your way of handling and dealing with things was the only way to make things work. Don’t get close. You’ll only get burned in the process.
Everyone else had noticed the shift between you two as well. Jake had tried bringing it up with his twin, but immediately was shut down. He relayed the message to the others not to bring it up, whatever had happened obviously still too raw to handle. No one enjoyed being around a grumpy Josh anyways. 
He would transform into a truly awful person to be around on a daily basis. His normal patient, wondrous, and joyous persona would disappear and morph into one of the complete opposite. Locking himself away in the various hotel rooms, bus bunk bed, not wanting to see or speak to anyone. No performance he gave good enough or to the impossible standards he was holding himself too. 
It wasn’t good.
That’s why when you were sitting at a desk in a hotel lobby, battling an airline over a ticket mixup, the spitting image of your boss in another life sat across from you, you knew what it was about. Hanging up the phone call with a sigh, you tried to force a smile on your depleted and tired features. 
“Mr. Kiszka, what can I do for you?” He removed his sunglasses, sitting them on the tabletop next to his resting arm and peered at you. “For starters, you can fix my brother.” Going to speak, he held up his hand, shaking his head. “Look, I don’t need all the details. All I know is that something happened between you two. It needs to be repaired because the way you two are trying to carry on is not cohesive for either of you. Just try and fix it.” 
Eyes falling downcast, you felt the weight of the situation sinking further onto you. “What if I say I don’t know if it can be,” Jake shrugged that off like it was silly to even suggest or think. “He likes you. In more than one way, which I’m sure is the root of this, but it’ll be fine. Talk to him. Josh, he-” taking a moment, rolling his eyes as well, he continued on, “likes to talk. Talk to him and get it worked out.” 
Standing outside of his hotel room, trying to muster up the courage to just knock, you were quite literally spinning in circles. Turning on your heel over and over, attempting to psych yourself up to just do it. 
Knock on the door.
The decision was made for you as it flew open as you lifted your hand to connect with the wood. A confused Josh stood on the other side, dressed like he was going to be going out. Instantly being able to tell you needed him for something. For what? That he didn’t know. 
“I thought we finished work at three today?” He asked, checking his phone for the time. It was far past that time. Shaking your head, you decided against what you were going to do. “Oh no, I apologize. It was for something else, but I see that you’re busy and heading out. We can do it later,” turning around to go across the hall to your own room, he still stood in the door frame.
He could easily tell how nervous you were. You didn’t hide your nerves well. Gnawing on your cheek, eyes constantly darting around, hands unable to remain still. It screamed at whoever you were projecting it to. In this case, Josh.
“No, no. I was just going to grab a drink.” Gulping, you began talking quickly. “Oh okay. I just wanted a quick second in private if you don’t mind. I don’t want to be a bother during your free time though so if you’d rather wait that’s totally fine, I understand.” His eyes slightly widened at your hastened words, holding his door open farther, a welcome to you to enter. 
You stepped in, seeing that the room was nearly spotless. Given, you had just checked in this afternoon, but still. You didn’t want to touch anything. Encroach on his personal space. Instead, you stood to the side, hands folded with themselves, trying not to look directly at him.
Observing you from his own spot, he was uneasy. Josh doesn’t do confrontations. Despite how much he enjoys talking and listening to others talk, he despises it when it’s negative. This wasn’t going to go well. He could just tell. 
“I would like to hand in my resignation, Mr. Kiszka.” 
He thought he was going to fall over. Out of every possibility, every scenario that could have happened. This is not what he was expecting. At all. Entirely floored, staring straight at you with his jaw slack, he started shaking his head. 
“No. Absolutely not. You can’t.” You had never felt such dread when quitting a position before. Normally, they were exciting. On your way to the next best thing. This was different. It was the best job you’d ever had with the best boss you’d ever had. 
It was killing you. 
“I think this is for the best. I can be around for as long as necessary until you can find a replacement and I will train them if needed.” Josh sat on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands, rubbing at his face. “We never should’ve slept together. Everything was going great. God, I regret that.” 
He wasn’t expecting your laugh to echo in the room. Snapping his head up at you, he was greeted with your smile and accompanying laugh. “I don’t. It was amazing. The entire reason I’m handing in my resignation is because I cannot continue to do my job and be in love with my boss.”
Watching as his face went blank as you continued talking, you had no idea what he was actually thinking. Since he was a person who wears their emotions on their face, when he went emotionless like this, it was even more nerve wracking. 
Uncharted territory. 
“I have fought it since we met. Seriously, the moment I saw you I knew this was going to be trouble. The more I got to know you, the more I fell for you. Keeping my professionalism and decorum has been so damn difficult because of you. And-and then we had that day together and it was incredible. I love you, Josh and I cannot keep working for you while I feel like this. It just can’t work because-” you didn’t get to finish before Josh was propelled up from his spot, hands cupping your cheeks as he pulled you to him.
Lips connecting in a messy and needy encounter, pawing at one another to get as close as possible. This wasn’t like the last time. This was desperate, angry, and resentful. Apologetic. 
Hardly finishing undressing before he was in you, hopelessly pounding you into the mattress below him. Unrelenting, a pace that knocked the wind out of you with every thrust. Unable to think about anything else other than Josh, Josh, Josh. 
He became your entire being at that time. Only allowing your thoughts to be riddled with him. No other noise allowed except his name falling from you like a prayer. 
How could you think of anything else when the man that was Josh was around. How stupid.
When you both had finished, his hands released their punishing grip on you. His fingertips left indents in your skin, sweat beginning to pool on his brow. Instead, his lips landed on each mark he had left on you. A searing memory of him. 
One you wouldn’t forget for a long, long time. 
Not wanting to break the peace that sat over the room. Too much left unsaid, but not willing to jump in right away. Wanting to bask in the comfort that followed him like a security blanket. 
Instead, you stared at Josh from the spot next to him in bed, you smiled at him. “I really do have to quit, Josh.” You finally spoke, wanting to establish some sort of boundary before moving forward together. 
He shrugged you off like you were batshit crazy for even suggesting that. A hint of mischief entered his eye before shrugging. 
“Not even on the table. Forbidden love. It’s totally hot. Let’s see how much we can get away with before people notice,” your laughter shook your body as Josh leaned down over you, connecting your lips together as laughter flowed between you both.
Being bad sounded like fun. As long as Josh was by your side to do it, it would always be fine. 
875 notes · View notes
fleet-of-fiction · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media
Josh Kiszka // Female Reader
Summary: A chance encounter in the kitchen in the middle of the night turns your insomnia into an erotic feast.
Warnings: 100% smut. Oral. Use of food in sex.
The kitchen light flickered on softly. You lift your head up from your book, spoon lilting softly on your bottom lip as you linger on the taste of chocolate ice cream.
Josh is standing in the hallway, his finger poised on the light switch. Bed curls tumbled around his forehead as he rubbed his tired eyes with his other hand. His belly moving against his breath, the little V shape of his waist sitting snugly against the band of his underwear. Your eyes were immediately drawn to it as he realised you were sitting there in only the black lace panties he'd gifted you last birthday.
"You can't sleep?" He asks, the dreamy rasp in his voice commanding all your attention.
You slide your book aside. Leaning up to stretch lazily, you watch him pad his way over to you on bare feet. He smells like fresh linen as he swirls the bar stool you're perched on around.
"Something like that." You reply, slipping your spoon into the half empty tub of ben & jerry's.
Josh pulls you in lithely, bringing your breasts to the skin of his chest. Your arms tangle familiarly around his neck. He takes a moment to breathe you in, his hands on the small of your back sending shivers down your spine.
"Are you cold, Mama?" He asks, feeling your body shudder against his. "You eaten too much ice cream?"
He knows how your body reacts to him. He's always known. The way his touch brought you to a place you'd never reached with any other. With Josh, there was never a time when you'd ever welcomed him into your arms and not felt as if electricity coursed through your veins.
"There's no such thing as too much." You teased, bringing the spoon from the tub to his waiting mouth.
He took the ice cream gratefully, keeping his mouth open as you crush yours against his. You taste him and the ice cream, his tongue moving the chocolate into your mouth and turning your kiss into a dark mess. A quiet moan escapes your chocolate covered lips and his tongue probes further.
The bar stool allows you to meet his waist at perfect symmetry. Your open legs shimmy to the edge, feeling his growing manhood behind his strained underwear.
Those brown eyes are so serious as he looks you over. That vacant stare that was full of secrets had been the one which had reeled you in. Purposefully undressing you with them, tangibly calling to you to respond over a crowd of faceless bodies that had stood between you.
Perhaps it was the intensity of that look which kept you bound to him? Perhaps it was the way that he loved you so effortlessly in the transpiring months since that first night? Josh was an enigma. You were still discovering him, and it seemed as if every new discovery was more delicious than the first.
"Tastes so fucking good." He murmurs, taking your chin in his hand as he lifts your face up to inspect the mess around your lips.
He moves your head slowly from left to right, a look of satisfaction building in the way the corner of his smile turns upward.
"Yeah?" You clarify, letting him play with your mouth as he licks the residue from your bottom lip.
You run the tip of your finger through his moustache, where the ice cream has melted into the fine, coarse hairs. There's a playful edge to it as you giggle, and he falls into a shared laughter as you nestle your face into the nape of his neck.
"Don't you be getting all soft on me." His voice is low, urging you to cease the playful edge to your touch.
Josh had sensed your willingness to comply almost immediately. As if his burning intensity hadn't drawn you to him, it had been the way you threw your head back when you laughed which had brought him to you. And when he asked you to settle into a serenity with him, you held his hand and walked into that space with him so willingly.
"Soft?" You look him dead in the eye. "Soft, like this?"
His pupils dilate as you fill your mouth with ice cream and slink off the bar stool in one fluid move, your hands sliding down his body until your knees land on the cool tiled floor. Fingertips pull at his waist band, pulling down his underwear to reveal a hardness that springs free and rests against your flushed cheek.
You feel that hand at your chin again, tilting it up so that he can see your intention. The ice cream melts slowly in your warm mouth and he puts pressure on your jaw to open up. He nods slowly at the sight of it there, melting on your tongue as he angles himself perfectly against your opening. You feel his tip graze your lips as he sinks inside your mouth, the taste of his skin and the ice cream as you swallow.
"Sweet...fuck!" He hisses, "Shit, baby that's so fucking good!"
The way he speaks, so candidly and in a way only you get to hear, it makes your stomach churn with an anticipation that makes your clit begin to throb almost immediately. His voice is like velvet, sweet to you in the cold light of day. Speaking only words of love and affirmation. But in the middle of the night, he would speak in demonic tones that left your legs weak after the fucking he described to you first.
"Take it all the way back, just like that Mama..." He guides, taking care to hold your chin steady as you open wider.
His cock is throbbing, you can feel it in the veins as his blood pulsated through it and against the inside of your mouth. You still found yourself admiring it, the thickness of it, any time the opportunity presented itself. He liked the way you looked at it, marvelling at your eagerness to have it.
Sweet Josh, who he was in those moments which were littered with love and affection, could never have imagined having you like this. You had brought yourself to his attention with your effortless smile, the moment he realised you were sexually compliant it had been as if his love had known no limits. You were hooked. And he, without apology, was yours completely.
"You look so fucking beautiful like that." He told you, his eyes half shut as he rocked into your mouth.
You wanted to speak. You felt the words you wanted to say lose themselves as you lapped the flat of your tongue against his length. When you could no longer taste the ice cream, he pulled out and watched your swollen lips all pink and wet try to recover. He wiped his thumb across your mouth and marvelled at the sight of you down on the floor.
"Josh..." You said in whisper, rising from the hard cold tiles.
He hushed you before you could say whatever it was you'd intended to say. Lifting you effortlessly onto the kitchen counter, hooking fingers around the elastic of your panties.
"Josh, please..." You beg. "Let me tell you how I want it?"
He raises a speculative eyebrow as he tosses your panties aside, leaning in with sculpted arms on either side of you.
"Ok, Mama." He acquiesces. "Tell me a story."
You're his little pet in moments like that. He looks at you with eyes that could devour you whilst waiting for you to say sweet things to him. He rakes a hand through your hair and down your cheek. As if in that you're moment you are innocent of the thing you had just done. You like it, though.
"I want you to put that pretty mouth on my pussy." You say, trying to keep your voice sweet and feminine.
Your fingertip runs across his moustache and down the hair which lines his chin, hiding the little dimple there.
"And then I want you to start fucking singing on it." You add, circling for him to start opening his mouth.
Josh's eyes move down the length of your body. You move your fingers away from his mouth and start kissing him, the tip of your tongue searching for his. His breath warm and heavy in your mouth, almost as if he's held it and is breathing again for the first time.
"I want you to lick inside me." You manage between kisses, "Swallow my wetness and let me cum on your mouth before you fuck me."
Your attention is diverted back to his facial hair. "I wanna see this glistening, baby. All of it."
He doesn't wait to placate you. To tell you how your words fired him up. Your back is immediately on the kitchen work top, cool and hard like the floor tiles. Knees pushed up to the counter edge, his head between your thighs without warning. You lift your head to watch his curls move as he licks up your slit, taking in how he lays his head on your thigh and grips your waist to drag you to him deeper.
"Shit, Josh..." You moan, "Damn, baby. So fucking good..."
He's moaning too. A literal melody on your aching clit, the vibrations of his tongue reminiscent of the way you'd seen him hit those high notes on stage. You can't help but take a fist of his hair, forcing his mouth into you further. You feel his tongue inside your opening, doing exactly as he was told.
"You're so fucking good to me." You pant, trying to keep yourself from the orgasm that was building in the pit of your stomach.
Of all the things you had discovered about Josh, your favourite was the way your joy was his. He took delight in doing your bidding. Feeling your warm, wet pussy against his mouth was in turn, making his cock leak all over his inner thigh.
In the midst of your writhing on the kitchen counter, you hadn't noticed him reach for the ice cream. A sudden hit of chill courses between your legs as you realise his mouth is full of it, licking it into you and tasting both you and the chocolate. He takes you over the edge, sliding a finger into you to fuck you quick as you cum.
"Holy shit, are you insane?!" You laugh, feeling your body vibrate against the hot and cold sensations.
Josh is wiping the back of his hand against his mouth, a smug grin resonating.
"Do I get to fuck you now, Mama?" He asks prudently, admiring the sheen across your skin.
You slide to the edge of the counter, making sure to keep his gaze on your opening.
"Sure thing." You purr, pulling him into you. "Enough with the ice cream though. I want the main course."
He laughs at you, an almost silent breathy sound as he buries his face between your breasts and kisses the curve of them.
That night was never meant for sleep.
.
.
.
@caprisunsister @thewritingbeforesunrise @takenbythemadness @katuschka @its-interesting-van-kleep @lvnterninthenight @writingcold @jakekiszkasbuttsweat @edgingthedarkness @velveteencatch @lyndz2names @nina-23-45 @itsafullmoon y @char289 @dancingcarbon @gvfpal @violetstarcatcher @wetkleenex-gvf @jazzyfigz @gvfmarge @ignite-my-fire
132 notes · View notes
stardustvanfleet · 4 months
Text
Merry Christmas To You — Josh Kiszka x Reader (Fluff)
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
PAIRING: Josh Kiszka x F!Reader, Fluff
WORDS: 2.2k
SUMMARY: It's a snowy night in early December, and you and your boyfriend Josh are having a cozy night in, decorating your tree. When he puts one of his favorite classic Christmas albums on, the evening becomes even more romantic thanks to an impromptu serenade.
WARNINGS: None beyond kissing, language, mention of alcohol, and minor flirtatious innuendo.
A/N: Happy holidays and Merry Christmas, everyone! I hope you enjoy this incredibly cozy and sugary sweet festive fluff. I had hoped to get this out a bit earlier in the month, but between working two jobs and preparing for the holidays it took a bit longer than expected, so thank you all so much for bearing with me during this time of year that is so damn hectic!!! Some special thanks here go to my loves @sinsofstardust and @losfacedevil for beta reading and being endless sources of both inspiration and love-- I adore y'all!!! I hope you all have a very happy holiday ❤️
FIC BEGINS BELOW THE CUT!
//
It was one of those December nights that you wished you could live in forever. Dusk had fallen early, and a light snow was falling outside; the soft, downy flakes catching in the light of the streetlamps as they tumbled gently towards the ground. For the first time in your new apartment, the one that you and your boyfriend Josh had moved into together just a few months earlier, the view through your window panes was truly beginning to resemble a Christmas card.
You took a sip from your mug of cocoa, which had been generously spiked with Bailey’s, but still tasted dangerously sweet. Turning over your shoulder with a grin, you caught Josh’s eye as he entered the living room with his own mug, steaming hot and piled high with whipped cream. You couldn’t help but feel your heart swell when you saw him— looking so handsome in one of his cozy white sweaters, his curls framing his face so beautifully, it was inevitable that he still gave you butterflies after all this time. 
“Josh, come watch the snow with me, love,” you giggled, curled up on your couch, which was pushed up right up against the largest window in the living room— it had been a perfect spot for watching the leaves change color and eventually fall to the ground, and now it provided an exceptional view of the picturesque wintery scene outdoors. His grin was infectious as he looked over towards the window and mused, crossing the room towards you, “How about that? It looks like we’ve got a winter wonderland on our hands…” reaching the couch rather quickly and setting his mug down on the coffee table.
 He slid in right next to you, his arms immediately wrapping around your waist as he moved to press affectionate kisses to your cheek, one after another, not seeming to want to stop as long as he had you giggling under him.  Finally, you pleaded through your laughter, “Joshy… I don’t see you watching the snow!” as he gave a chuckle of his own and teased, “Ohh, sorry about that, mama… you know how distracted I can get…”
You captured his chin between your fingers with another giggle, feeling heat rising in your cheeks at his use of the pet name which he knew always made you weak in the knees. “Seems particularly easy to get distracted around here….” you replied playfully, before pulling him in and kissing him fully, your heart fluttering at the satisfied sigh he let out against your lips. It was all so endearing, from the softness of his lips to the familiarity of his scent, which was spicy and comforting and floral all at once. There may have been a chill in the air that day, but in the warmth of Josh’s arms, with his lips against yours… despite the weather, it was undeniable— you were melting.
It would have been so easy to get entirely lost in the kiss, but he began to smile against your lips, and pulled back gently, offering you a cheeky smile as he teased back, “Careful, or I’ll get distracted enough that we’ll have to push decorating the tree to another night…” his words making you giggle and lightly, jokingly smack at his arm, chiding, “Joshua… you’re gonna end up on the naughty list….” giving him another quick kiss and a grin before wriggling out of his grasp to rise from the couch towards the large box of ornaments sitting beside the coffee table.
“Hold on, angel…” Josh said, standing up himself as you paused, turning to face him with a smile. He was looking at you with a twinkle in his eye while heading towards the record player set up beside the bookshelf, continuing, “Is it really Christmas if we don’t have the perfect soundtrack?” You watched with amusement as he crouched down to rifle through the large record collection that the two of you had assembled, a wide grin breaking out on his face when he found what he was looking for. “Nat King Cole,” he said with satisfaction, “...now, there’s a reason his middle name is King. And, well… okay, so it’s two reasons. The first reason is that it’s his name, naturally, but there’s also another reason… the big reason, the important one. And it’s that he’s the King of Christmas. it’s just that simple…” 
You found yourself giggling with affection as your boyfriend rambled on; it was one of the many little things about Josh that had made you fall in love with him. As he spoke, he stood from his crouching position to place the record on the turntable and lower the needle, and the cozy tones of Deck the Halls began to play in the living room— Josh’s handsome face illuminated only by the flickering light of the fireplace and the warm golden glow of the lights already set up on your Christmas tree. The light danced across his delicate features as he rose to walk towards you and the box of ornaments, and he offered another grin, asking, “Shall we get this decorating soiree started?”
You laughed again, unable to deny the way his turn of phrase and distinct mannerisms made you feel with your heart fluttering so distinctly in your chest. When at last he reached you and began rummaging through the box of ornaments, you couldn’t take your eyes off him. When he finally looked up to meet your gaze with a knowing half-smile, you tenderly leaned in to kiss him gently once more, before pulling back and replying, “Okay, now we shall,” which elicited a laugh from the man in front of you, his warm brown eyes sparkling in the low light as he replied, “A very important final step before we get started… my darlin’ is so thorough.” You giggled breathlessly at the affectionate nickname, taking his hand inside the box of ornaments and giving it a squeeze. 
Together, you began picking out ornaments and hanging them on the tree, from sparkling white crystal snowflakes and pinecones, to small figurines of ice skaters and Santa Claus, to childhood photos of the two of you in tiny silver frames— Josh insisted that those should be hung up beside each other, saying definitively, “I’ll need you to keep me company up there!” 
Between his jokes and your responses, Nat King Cole’s voice served as a backdrop, his gentle crooning making the room feel cozy and festive beyond belief. The reflection of the Christmas lights were twinkling in Josh’s eyes as he stole glances at you while you both hung ornaments on the tree at once, his hand coming to wrap around your waist for a stolen moment as he headed back towards the box to grab his next ornament of choice. Your heart stuttered deep within your chest, beginning to pick up its pace at Josh’s loving looks and touches.
It was when Josh’s favorite Christmas carol began, however, that he really began to focus his attention on you. The familiar swell of strings marked the beginning of Nat King Cole’s rendition of The Christmas Song, and as Josh crossed back towards you to hang a silver bell on the tree, he caught your eye with a smile, before beginning to sing along with the record. “Chestnuts roasting on an open fire…” You felt heat immediately beginning to rise in your cheeks as a look of joy appeared on your face. Nothing made you melt more than Josh’s voice. “Jack Frost nipping at your nose…” He gave you an affectionate smile while singing the lyrics, reaching out to tap the end of your nose with his fingertip at the end of the line, which made you giggle wildly. You reached up to grab his hand and pull it to your lips, pressing little kisses to his knuckles as he continued singing along. You were mesmerized, unable to tear your gaze away from him even if you wanted to. Everything about Josh was enough to light up a room, but whenever he decided on performing for you, even in the comfort of your own home— it was still always utterly captivating. He was breathtakingly talented, and unfathomably beautiful.
Gently, tenderly, Josh’s hand fell to your waist while he continued the song, the words flowing as smoothly and sweetly as honey. “Everybody knows… a turkey and some mistletoe… help to make the season bright…” He was beginning to sway you along to the music, and you were letting him— lost entirely in his voice, his loving touch, his gaze, in this moment that was beginning to feel dizzying in its domesticity. By the time the song reached its instrumental interlude, the two of you were slow dancing in the living room— your head coming to rest on Josh’s shoulder, face buried in his neck as he held you close, sweeping you around the room in slow circles to the piano instrumental. He was so warm, and you could feel the soft rise and fall of his breaths through the cozy knit fabric of his sweater. When you finally lifted your head to meet his eyes for the final chorus, the love you were feeling for him was almost overwhelming.
“And so, I’m offering this simple phrase… for kids from one to ninety-two…” Josh paused in his serenade for a moment to bring his free hand to cup your face, stroking his thumb across your cheekbone as he smiled at you with undeniable affection. “And though it’s been said, many times, many ways… Merry Christmas… to you…”
You knew you were looking at him like he had hung the moon in the sky for you… but, frankly, with the adoration in his eyes, it almost seemed like he’d truly have been willing to try. As the song reached its conclusion, you leaned in without even needing to think, capturing his lips so lovingly and passionately that Josh let out a soft sigh against your lips, struck by surprise and delight. You found yourself lost in him, lost in your feelings, as you melted entirely in his arms, his hand still cupping your cheek and jaw with unmistakable tenderness. By the time you two finally allowed your lips to separate, the next song had already been playing for what had surely been over a minute. After a breathless moment of collecting yourself that must’ve taken a few seconds, you managed to let your eyes flutter open, only to see Josh opening his eyes at nearly the exact same time— the sight making you giggle, your heart skipping a beat within your chest.
“Your voice is unbelievable,” you murmured, reaching your own hand over to cup his cheek in return, which prompted him to lean into your touch so effortlessly and subconsciously. Instantly, even in the low light, you could tell the compliment was making him blush, with his cheeks and the tip of his nose flushing a rosy red under your touch as he averted his gaze shyly, letting out a bashful, “Oh, god… Thank you… I think you’re unbelievable.” A smile crossed your face as he paused for a moment, blinking at you as if in thought before continuing, looking at you so lovingly, “I’m so happy we get to make Christmas memories in a place all our own this year, angel… you’re home to me, lover. You make it feel like Christmas.”
Truly, you couldn’t have said it better yourself. 
The moment was breathtaking. Josh’s words, his eyes, the glow of the Christmas tree and the crackling of the fire… everything was so perfect. Your smile, at this point, was entirely out of your control— you wouldn’t have been able to stop even if you had wanted to try. Words failed you for a moment as emotions swirled like snowflakes within you. “Oh, Josh… I love you so much.”
He was grinning at you, and you couldn’t take your eyes off of him. When he spoke again, you could hear the affection in his voice. “I love you so much, darlin’. I’d lasso the moon for you.”
His reference to It’s A Wonderful Life made your smile widen even further—- something you had previously doubted was even possible. Your head was spinning a little from his romantic words, and when you finally managed to speak again between shy giggles, you teased, “You’re too smooth for your own good… but it is a wonderful life, Josh, because I’ve got you.”
Josh laughed a little, breathlessly, the rosiness of his cheeks still so endearing. You couldn’t resist any longer, closing the distance between the two of you and kissing him, so deeply and passionately that he almost faltered on his feet for a moment, his grip tightening on you to steady himself— and perhaps from a desire to be even closer to you.
When you finally pulled back, the Nat King Cole record still softly playing and your tree sparkling behind you, the two of you once again took a moment before opening your eyes. You found yourself lost in Josh’s warm embrace, the scent of him, the feeling of his heartbeat against yours. You were all his, and he was all yours. And this was only the beginning.
The words left your lips in a whisper, affectionate and gentle. “Merry Christmas, Josh.”
He leaned in, pressing his forehead to yours.
“Merry Christmas, angel.”
//
A/N: Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, everyone! If you enjoyed this, you can find my masterlist here and be added to my taglist here.
TAGLIST: @sinsofstardust @jakesguitarsolo @losfacedevil @sparrowofthedawnsworld @gold-mines-melting @texas-bbq-pringles @mountain-in-springtime @alwaysonthemend @tripthelightfatality @tommie-gvf @second-suns @runwayblues @shutupdevvie @godly-sinsx @sacredjake @ignite-my-fire @kiska-enthusiast @songbirds-sweet @rhythm-of-space @hsfallingsky @the-starcatcher @kenobicoffee @earthlysorrows @zm-gvf
116 notes · View notes
abeautylives · 24 days
Text
Times I Remember Well
(and Some That I Don’t)
Part 1
Tumblr media
author’s note: I’m really excited to have something to share with you guys. It’s written from a diff POV than I usually do, but my main character girly pop has a lot of personality 😘 Big big big thank you to bff @samkiszkasfacialhair for all the help, the ideas, and the motivation 🤍
pairing: female!OCxkiszkas (just read it, you’ll figure it out)
time frame: 2010-2014
word count: 5.7k this part
warnings: language, illicit substance use, rampant teenage emotions and delulu, kissing, josh 🥺
I don’t actually remember the day I met Sam Kiszka.
Not the date, or even the day of the week. I do know what year it was, because it was the year my mom moved us to this quaint (read: weird) little town. Charming, but weird. And boring.
Boring, until I met Sam.
Eleven-year-old Sam was a menace, but twelve-year-old me was bored. So obviously, we became the best of friends. He taught me how to light a firecracker, I had an endless supply of Barbies to blow up. He showed me how to slip out of my bedroom window without making a sound, I told him how to impress girls without grossing them out. In our early teenage years, he introduced me to drugs and I taught him how to unclasp a bra. Chill out, it was weed, and I wasn’t even wearing the bra.
My mom just loved that I’d made such a great friend.
The first time I was allowed to play at his house I met his sister, who was closer to my age, but it was too late. Sam and I were already attached at the hip, though mine sat an inch or two higher than his for a couple of years, until a growth spurt and puberty eventually left him with the height advantage.
That was when he stopped calling me by my name, and started calling me Tiny. Like I said, a menace.
“You’re the coolest girl I know, even if you’re vertically challenged.”
Please note: the first time he said this to me, he had finally just surpassed me in height by half an inch.
Then of course, there were the twins. You’d think the eldest siblings would not have become a big part of my life, but they were just always around, and actually liked hanging out with their baby brother. Close knit family and all that. It’s weird, right? At the wise and worldly age of twelve, the two fourteen-year-olds terrified me. Josh and Jake were both scary in their own way to a pubescent girl on the cusp of teenager-dom. Jake was pretty quiet, but his ego was not. He was hot, okay? In like, a Justin Bieber-y way but also kind of a jock-y way, but a jock with a guitar. Whatever, I’m only human.
Josh was… well, Josh was Josh. Unlike anyone else I’d ever met, and not necessarily in a good way. He was loud, like, all the time. He never seemed to stop talking and ended most of his sentences at an eardrum-piercing decibel level. Fortunately, or not, he didn’t get hot until I was old enough to obsess over it.
I’m sure I didn’t speak a coherent word to either of them the entire first year of my friendship with Sam.
I have a million memories of the time I spent with Sam and his family, but I have no recollection of the day I fell in love with Josh Kiszka.
But once I did, it was a deep, obsessive kind of love that only a teenager can achieve. One day he was my best friend’s eccentric older brother and the next…
Well, the next he was a rockstar.
I mentioned the whole jock with a guitar thing that Jake had going on, and that really hadn’t changed, but somewhere along the way Josh had transformed from a loud, annoying theater kid to a genuine, full blown vocalist. I mean, for a while he was both.
When they first started playing together, I only gave a shit because they’d roped Sam into it too and it took up way too much of his time. I’d watch them play, and they weren’t… bad? They weren’t good either. My time could have been better spent watching R rated movies (scandalous) or, I don’t know, doing my homework. But nope! We were in a band now.
They practiced, a lot. It felt like all they did was practice, for at least a couple years. And I just watched dutifully, every weekend of every month of every year. They did get better.
But here’s the thing. I was there for all of it. I was there the day Jake ran into the living room and snatched Sam up by the back of his shirt. Come on Sammy boy, we need you on bass. I was there the day their buddy Kyle sat down at the drum kit and completed the ensemble. (I was also there the day he got replaced.) And of course, I was there the day Josh pushed his voice past the instruments and the amps, and went from a weak imitation of a rock singer to something else all together. Something totally and completely him.
That’s not the day I fell in love with him (I would’ve remembered), but it was the first time he had ever… impressed me. And not that I cared, but Jake was impressed too. I saw it on his face.
It was cute. In like, a sweet, brotherly way.
Okay, anyway! The combination of Jake’s skill and Josh’s raw talent got them noticed. (Sammy’s talent would develop over time, I didn’t forget about him. Sam, you’re the most talented one in the band.) And then they were playing actual gigs. I wasn’t allowed to go to most of those early ones, because for some reason these dive bars were permitting these pint sized, teenage Zeppelin wannabes to perform at them. Old people like our parents loved that shit. The locals went crazy for it.
They played Fischer Hall a couple times, right there in town, but around their third or fourth gig there, Josh had unbuttoned the flowy, floral, women’s blouse he was wearing and took to the stage with it hanging open, beaded necklaces draped down his bare chest and curly hair wild.
Why was he sort of… ripped? How had I never noticed? Were his pants always so tight? And low cut? I was sweating. I didn’t even know he was literally cosplaying Robert Plant.
Did I fall in love with him that night? Of course not, I already told you I don’t remember the day that happened.
The Saturday after my sixteenth birthday, I left my house around 8:30 to head to Sam’s. To my mom, this was an average Saturday night - I spent nearly all of them at Sam’s house, where his parents were always home. Ya know, or so mine thought. Whether the Kiszkas were actually home or not, we hung out in the garage.
That’s not as weird as it sounds, it was a really cool garage. With furniture and everything. And their instruments, a lot of them. I don’t know how every one of these guys knew how to play every instrument packed into that room, but they did. And by the time I was sixteen, they were really almost good at it.
(Jake was good. Very good… I told you he was hot.)
This particular Saturday though, this was going to be the Saturday that changed my life. And I wanted to dress the part.
In hindsight, I wore something I’d probably worn a hundred times. Then why had it taken me so long to get ready? I changed my jeans twice, my shirt at least ten times, added a sweater, threw it back on my bed, added a flannel, tossed that to the floor. Picked it back up and shoved my arms in, made sure it hung off my shoulder just so. Shoulders are sexy, right? Do guys like shoulders? Oh shit, what do guys even like?
Anyway, I left the house looking exactly as I always did.
I rode my bike slowly that night, already hyper aware of the sweat under my arms.
So I slowed my pedaling even further. When the house came into view, I hopped off the bike and walked it up the drive before tossing it to the grass outside the garage.
Okay, knock twice and just go in.
That’s what everyone always did, what I always did. Just knock twice then lift the door. Everyone was always welcome, come on in!
So go in, idiot.
Look, I did it eventually. Just like always, knock knock, lift the door enough to slip underneath, let it close behind me. Except when it rolled back to the ground, I lost my nerve and stood frozen there for a few seconds too long.
Sam called me out, because he’s a menace.
“The hell are you doing, Tiny? We started without you.”
I moved farther into the space, eyes bouncing between my options through the soft haze of pungent smoke that already hung over the room. There was my usual spot - on the floor, next to the spot where Sam sat cross-legged, his long frame folded and bent, his sharp elbows resting on his knees as he waited for the joint to make its way back to him.
Not tonight, I’m on a mission.
Jake sat to his left, in a well-worn, floral print wingback chair. It was comfortable enough for one person, decades of weight softening the strength of the cushion’s springs before it ever came to live in this particular garage. Jake’s body was slung over it, legs thrown haphazardly over an arm while his own were wrapped around an acoustic guitar. Typical. He tipped his chin at me from under the brim of a bucket hat, then nodded towards the floor beside him. Holy shit, does he want me to sit by him?! I think my fingers lifted in a barely-there wave but I’m not really sure they were functioning correctly.
Okay focus, he did not. Does not. Not in this lifetime.
Still without his next hit, Sam glanced up at me over his shoulder and patted the threadbare throw rug next to him. “Sit down weirdo, you’re making me paranoid.”
Nerves that I’d never, never, felt before in this room fluttered through my stomach, I let my gaze meet Sam’s before continuing the search for a place to plant myself.
There was really only one option left - the couch - and both ends were already occupied. Our friend Danny (Kyle’s replacement, sorry Kyle) was in the process of melting into the corner closest to Jake, his eyes glassy and already tinged pink when he looked up at me. Only his eyebrows lifted in greeting before he mirrored Sam’s offer to sit next to him, tapping the cushion beside him.
This is fine, totally normal! Danny was Sam’s other half. Well, his other male half. I guess we were in thirds. A trio.
I accepted the offering, stepping around the coffee table, scarred with years worth of “art” - drawings and carvings, a few discreet dirty words etched into the surface in between - to drop to the middle of the couch. One of Sam’s brows tipped up when I met his eyes again, his expression asking, “Dude, what gives?”
“Hey, you’re here!” He noticed me, finally. Silvery smoke crept from between his lips as he grinned, and I watched transfixed when they pursed together and he blew a cloud toward the ceiling. My stare was broken when he leaned across the table and passed the joint to an impatient Sam, but to the delight of the butterflies going nuts in the pit of my stomach, he leaned back into the cushions and threw an arm over the back of the couch behind me. EEEEP!
“Hey-“ It was a humiliating and unsexy croak, and I quickly cleared my throat and tried again. “Hey, Josh. Hi.”
His long hair was pulled back, his entire face available for my viewing pleasure. Things were going perfectly.
I joined the rotation, the weed easing the flutters caused by sitting so close to Josh, but amplifying the feeling that the other three were watching and wondering why I was acting so strange.
They were not. They were high.
Aside from the stray curious eyebrow from my BFF across the table, they actually acted like nothing was abnormal about my seating choice, even when I started to scooch imperceptibly to my left every time I adjusted the way I was sitting.
Pulled my legs up under me? Scooch.
Dropped them down so my sneakers met the cement? Scooch.
Crossed my left ankle over my right knee? Scooch.
It was totally subtle.
“I’m gonna grab a pop, you guys want anything?” Sam startled me out of a pleasant reverie as he jumped up from the floor, but my freaking knee was touching Josh’s knee! No I don’t want anything, I have everything I need right here!
It turned out Sam was a huge knee blocker. He gripped me by an elbow and peeled me from the couch as the others murmured at our retreating backs about needing Doritos. He pushed me out the side door and towards the house and had me in the kitchen before I could even tell him he was ruining everything!
Even through bleary, hooded eyes, his death glare was brutal.
“Saaammmmm, what are you doing?!” “What the hell do you think you’re doing, T?”
More glaring. He broke the glare-off first, jerking his head to the side to flick his hair out of his eyes and turning to open the refrigerator, but once his face was inside it, he called me out again.
“Why are you being so weird with Josh?”
I love him, I need him!
“Whaaa.. I don’t know what you mean. You’re just super high.” Yeah, I really thought that would work. Sue me!
Straightening to his full height (seriously, like two inches taller than me… maybe three), he spun to face me again. He actually looked down his nose at me.
“Do you like, like him? What the fuck, Tiny?” He whispered that last part, as if his parents were lurking around the corner waiting to bust him for cussing.
“Look, you wouldn’t understand Sam. I’m much older than y-“
“You’re not even an entire year older than me.”
“Eleven months is basically an entire ye-“
“That’s not the point!” That part was like whisper yelling. I swear it looked like he was yelling, but it sounded like he was whispering.
“Okay!” Yeah, I whisper yelled back. “Sammy, I like him… I’m sorry! I don’t even know when it happened but I woke up one day and I realized that he’s perfect! He’s funny and nice and he’s so… so… cute! Okay? He’s so cute I wanna die and I love him!”
Sam’s eyes were wide, as wide as they could be under the circumstances, and he stared at me like I’d grown another head. With a horn coming out of it.
“You love him. You realize how dumb you sound right now?”
Dumb? No no, this was serious. I pleaded with my best friend for forgiveness. And his help. “Sam… please. Don’t be mad at me, I- I don’t know, I can’t help it! That’s just how I feel, and I want him to like me back!” That’s when it hit me, I needed a wingman for this plan.
“Can you help me get him to like me back?” I gave him my best puppy dog eyes, bottom lip stuck out and everything. As if that had ever worked in the four years we’d known each other so far.
“Fuck no.” His eyes moved side to side, looking for sneaky parents again I guessed. “Definitely not. Why do you have to like my brother, dude? That’s sick, it’s like incest or something!” He stomped his feet a little, and I couldn't help but think it made him look like a child. He was a child! This was serious, grown-up shit and I didn’t have time to play games.
“Ugh, if you’re not gonna help me then at least get out of my way.” I pushed past him and headed back out of the house and into the garage. Not much had changed when I got there, but Danny must have left while Sam and I were gone. The entire couch was empty aside from Josh, still sitting cross-legged in one corner. Damn it!
I flopped into the spot that Danny had vacated, just as Sam hustled back in through the side door, arms full of sodas and bags of chips. My cheeks were warm when I looked up at him, and then they burst into flames.
“Scoot over T, I like the corner spot.”
He’s helping me! Oh shit, he’s helping me. Move your ass!!
Fumbling for a grip on reality, I couldn’t tear my eyes away from Sam’s. He lifted his brows and tilted his head in Josh’s direction. I suddenly remembered why I wasted all my days with this kid - he’s my ride or die. And now I owed him, big.
As soon as I stood to shift to the center of the couch, Sam’s elbow snuck out and made contact with my shoulder. My feet tangled with each other and, balance lost, I tumbled. Right into the arms of my beloved.
Okay okay, that’s a reach. But I did land on him. Sam had nudged me just hard enough to send me toward the opposite end of the couch and I landed ass-first on Josh’s leg, still folded and crossed under the other.
Through the mortification, I heard Sam’s distinct snickering as he placed himself gently on the other cushion. Then, through the popping of soda tabs and crinkling of chip bags, I heard the sweetest, most beautiful sound ever.
“If you wanted to sit next to me so bad, you could’ve just done it, T.”
I quite literally had to extract myself from his lap, but Josh just giggled as I clumsily moved off of him. To my extreme delight and disbelief, I didn’t make it too far. He slung an arm over my shoulders and kept me at his side. We are sharing a cushion. ALERT ALERT - OUR THIGHS ARE TOUCHING.
His hand wrapped around the ball of my shoulder and squeezed. Not once, but twice. I felt like I was gonna puke, but I risked turning my head and meeting his eyes. And he. Fucking. Smiled.
“You good, Tiny?” I should’ve laughed. We were the same exact height, I could be calling him tiny. But this wasn’t funny, because he was still smiling at me and he’d lowered his voice to speak directly to me and I felt it all the way to my toes. Somehow I managed to smile back.
“I’m good.” I was soooooo good. Even when Sam shoved a bag of Doritos at me, I was good. Because Josh reached into it and pulled a few out for himself. He reached into my lap! For chips!
Risking a sideways glance at Sam, I found him eyeballing Josh’s hand that was still resting lightly over my shoulder. I gave him my best “holy shit holy shit holy shit” expression, to which he rolled his eyes and shrugged. Before turning my attention back to the love of my life, my gaze drifted past Sam and landed on Jake. Oh, he was still here? Hadn’t noticed.
Except I was noticing. And he didn’t look pleased. He locked in and held eye contact, absolutely scowling. He was pissed. At me?! I must not have hidden my surprise well, because after a few more tense seconds of the longest eye contact we’d ever held, he blinked away and flung the guitar he’d been cradling all night over the arm of the chair.
Look, he didn’t throw it or anything. The stand was right there and the guitar landed safely, if not a little roughly, in its place. But then he tossed the open bag of Lay’s to the table, swung his legs around and stood. He caught my eye again, his hair doing that flippy thing over his eyebrows as he shook his head.
“Whatever. Night, guys.”
Just like that, he was gone. Two down, one to go. GTFO Sam!!
The next hour or so passed in a blur. Sam kept hitting the joint long after Josh and I had turned it down, and by the time he’d deposited the roach in the ashtray he could barely keep his eyes open. I watched his head fall back into the cushion and pounced on my opportunity.
Leaning away from Josh’s loving embrace (shut up, I was in heaven okay?), I slapped Sam’s chest with the back of my hand.
“Sammy… Sam!” He snorted as his head whipped up, swiped a hand over his mouth and looked at me. I was still leaning toward him, my back to Josh, and I spoke to him telepathically. Or with my eyebrows.
Get out of here right now or so help me God.
He answered verbally, like he couldn't even read my mind. “Huh?”
I withheld growling at him like an animal. “Why don’t you go to bed, man? You’re toast.” Go. NOW.
His eyes tried to focus on me, they really did, before he shook his head and tried again. “Shit. Yeah, okay. Are you… do you wanna stay on the couch tonight?”
Yes. This couch. Allll night long.
“Yeah yeah, I will, but I’m not tired yet. I’m just gonna, um, chill here for a little bit longer?” At that, I turned my head and risked a glance at Josh. Thank God I did, because he was already looking at me, and he grinned. EEEEEEEP!
“I’m not tired yet either, we can listen to some music.” I doubted I could hear music at that point, not over the blood rushing in my ears. But then, oh then, he looked up at Sam and said, “I’ll make sure she makes it to bed, I mean, the couch. Downstairs, I’ll make sure she makes it downstairs.”
“Fine, whatever.” See? He’s my ride or die. “See you in the morning, T.” And then he was gone.
We were alone.
HELLO? WE. WERE. ALONE.
Sure, I’d been alone with Josh before. I’d been hanging around his house nearly every day for four years, we’d definitely been left in a room together at some point. But not while his arm was draped loosely over my shoulders, not while our legs were touching, not while my heart was about to beat out of my chest.
But now that we were alone, I had no effing clue what to do. Then Josh stood up. My heart dropped into my stomach, but he walked over to the stacked milk crates that housed a small part of their family’s record collection and crouched to skim through them. He found something he liked and set it on the turntable, the needle bringing the crackling beginnings of a song to life.
When he turned back to face me, I thought for sure he’d sit in that ugly wingback chair. Or at the other end of the couch. Instead, he circled the coffee table and sat on the opposite side of me than he had been all night. And now his other thigh was touching mine!
I’m pretty sure my throat closed up because I had to clear it rather unattractively to speak. “What, uhh, ha, um, who is this?”
Sexy, right?
Didn’t matter, his smile took shape right in front of my eyes and all I could see was the little barely-there gap between his front teeth. I wanted to know what it felt like on my tongue. Would I be able to tell? If I kissed him right now, would I be able to feel that little discrepancy in the perfection of his teeth? I lifted my eyes to meet his and realized he’d spoken, and I’d missed it.
“Sorry, uhh… what?”
His head tilted and his eyes searched my face for… something. “Wilson Pickett. Sammy hasn’t played this for you?”
Sammy? Who is Sammy? Ohhh right, best friend.
“Um, no, I don’t think so. But maybe? There’s always music on, he’s probably played this.”
He just nodded, at first in response to my rambling and then in time with the song. When it ended, he just… looked at me, for what felt like forever but was probably only a few seconds. I was once again hyper aware of my underarms. Sweating. So I slipped the flannel off of my shoulders, keeping my forearms in the sleeves but giving me some airflow to the pits. Josh’s eyes dropped from mine and landed on the now exposed skin. Yes! Guys like shoulders!
The realization slapped me in the face, so I grabbed it and ran. I slid my arms out of the sleeves and tossed the flannel past Josh and onto the chair, thanking God that I’d worn a tank top. He gulped. Like a full-blown gulp.
Omg I’m making him nervous!!
Confidence boosted, I shifted even closer to him, until our bodies were tucked tight against each other. I’d never been this close to him, aside from that one time we’d been crammed in the back seat of his mom’s car with Sam and Jake, their sister sitting pretty in the front seat. But then I had been a scrawny kid, only thirteen (and a half) and he had been a really weird fifteen year old, not yet having grown into his features. I hadn’t wanted any part of his stinky, sweaty, farty body near me and I’d squeezed myself so close to Sam I was practically in his lap.
But on this night? This Saturday after my sixteenth birthday, I was no longer a kid. And he was no longer weird. He was beautiful, and my face was really close to his face. I could feel it when he whispered, his breath actually touched my lips.
“Wha- what are you doing, T?”
He was looking at my lips, waiting for my answer. I licked them because I was freaking parched, but he watched. And I watched him gulp, again! My tongue slipped out and wet my bottom lip a second time.
“Josh?” Whispering is sexy, it’s seductive. I was sure of it. He did it back, just my name - my actual name - lilting at the end in question.
“Do you.. wanna… kiss me?” I leaned over him, placed my left hand on his chest and felt his collar bone under my fingertips through his t-shirt. Holy shit holy shit holy shit.
I saw the panic widen his eyes, then they darted around me, looking at anything but me. It was really so cute how nervous he was. He was eighteen, for Christ sake! And I was making him nervous!
“Kiss me, Josh.” His eyes snapped back to mine, slipped down to my mouth again and then back.
And then. He. Freaking. KISSED. ME.
In a split second that felt like hours, I watched his eyes close and perfect lips pucker. My eyes stayed open at first, I didn’t want to miss this.
Leaning further into him, I settled my lips against his and slid the hand on his chest up the side of his neck (his pulse was out of control, by the way), and then cradled his jaw. My fingertips were in his hair right behind his ear. I pulled his face closer and ramped up the pressure of our lips pushed together.
He put his hands on me. I swear to God, he really did! One reached for my hip and the other came up to rest against my cheek. My eyes fluttered closed and my body took over. Not a coherent thought left in my pretty little head. Especially when our mouths separated, and then he pushed them back together.
With a mind of its own, my other hand came up and gripped his shoulder. Then my leg swung over his lap and I. Was. Straddling. Him.
It wasn’t my fault. My brain had gone haywire, my body moving on instinct. I’d quite literally never done this before. I’d kissed plenty, I even kissed Sam once (barf), but this felt different. This felt mature. Probably a little more mature than I was ready for but like I said, it was not my fault.
A lot of blame fell on Josh, a whole mountain of it, when the hand on my cheek dropped to my other hip and gripped hard, pulled me flush against him. And his lips coerced my mouth open. And the tip of his tongue swept out and touched mine.
Oh, I was in way over my head. But this was Josh, the boy I loved, and he was loving me back!
A sound I’d never made before crept up my throat. Instant embarrassment heated my already toasty cheeks and climbed up my neck, but then. Ohh then. The same freaking sound came from somewhere below me. Josh groaned. Because of me.
My animal brain completely took over. My tongue was already sliding against his, and my hips decided to follow suit. With zero finesse, they rocked into his. Just once.
He broke the kiss and dropped his head back to the cushion.
No no noooooo, you like this! You love it!
I could feel the proof that he loved it. I was sitting on it. I could see it, his chest heaving.
So I leaned forward and pressed a kiss against his throat.
“Stop, T.” His hands fell limp and landed on my thighs. My brain scrambled to catch up. Stop? Go! His fingers spread across the denim on my legs. Go go go!
But then he pushed. I leaned back to see his face, find an explanation, but his eyes were still closed as he pushed me off of his lap. Helped me swing my leg back over. Kept his hands on my thighs until they were planted back on the couch and closed. Firmly. Then they left me, and I felt their absence like a knife to the heart.
“I… wow, okay.” It’s the best I could manage to formulate, but my brain was running in overdrive.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have let that happen.” He rubbed his palms, the ones that were just holding me, over his knees then leaned forward and dropped his forehead into them.
Okay, maybe he just thinks we were moving too fast!
“Josh, it’s okay. I want this! We can just kiss, I’ll stay over here and you stay there and-“
It was so quiet, but it stopped my words on my tongue and slammed my lips shut.
“I can’t.”
Okay. Okay. Okay.
It’s because Sam’s my best friend.
It’s because I’m too young.
He thinks I’m still a kid.
Like his kid sister.
Fuck!
Anger rolled through me. “Why? Is it Sam?”
He scrubbed his hands over his face and turned to me. Looked at me, finally.
“No, I-“
“Am I too young for you? You’re not that much older, Josh and we’ve known eachother forever, it’s not that big of a de-“
“It’s not that, Tiny.” His eyes closed again.
“Don’t call me that!” He’d offended me, I was o-ffen-ded. “I’m not a little fucking kid!” Okay, I was pissed! I was a grown ass woman!
(I wasn’t.)
Both of his hands reached forward and he pulled mine towards him. Held them there. Opened his eyes. Was he gonna cry? Why are his eyes wet?! Shit, am I crying?
“It’s not you, T. It’s me.” Oh please. “I- well, I um, I like someone else.”
Back to angry! “What?! Then why the hell were you kissing me?!” What a scoundrel, what a snake, what an asshole!
“It’s not like that-“
“What the fuck is it like?!” I didn’t normally curse much at that age, but when I tell you I was mad? Hurt? Embarrassed? I couldn’t stop it from happening.
Shit, his eyes were definitely wet.
“It’s a guy.”
He whispered it, and it wasn’t sexy, it wasn’t seductive. It was sad. Scared. Defeated. I snatched my hands out of his.
There was a long silence. Uncomfortable. He stared at his empty hands and we processed.
“What did you say?” His posture shrank, like he was trying to disappear. “Josh, it’s okay. Talk to me.” It was my turn to take his hands. I held them in mine and squeezed once.
“I’m so sorry, I- I just don’t like you. Like that.” His eyes found their way back to my face, “I really like him.” They went wide and I’m pretty sure mine did too. He seemed shocked that he’d said it out loud, right before panic spread across his features again.
“Please don’t say anything, T. I haven’t- no one knows that. No one. Please.”
“No, I would never Josh, I swear. I just… why were you, ya know, kissing me?” Touching me, pulling me in. He pulled his hands away from me this time.
“I just wanted to feel normal. I wanted them to think I was normal.”
I couldn’t help it. I threw my arms around him and held on tight.
“You are.” Normal and beautiful and perfect. And not mine. A heavy sigh slipped from between my lips. “There’s nothing wrong with you.”
He stayed silent, so I did too. I kept my arms around him for a few minutes before finally letting them slip free, rubbing a palm between his shoulder blades.
“I guess I should go… Are you okay?” Look, I was not okay, but it didn’t seem like that was important anymore.
“Aren’t you gonna stay downstairs tonight?”
Definitely not. “No, I think I should go home…” Probably won’t show my face over here for a goooood long time.
“Let me walk with you.”
I did. He walked on the other side of my bike while I walked it by the handlebars. When we reached my driveway, I left the bike propped against the side of the garage and turned to him. And just like in my dreams, he moved close and pecked a kiss into my cheek. Then he pulled me into his arms.
“I’m really sorry… I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, ya know?” His voice was soft and low, his breath tickling my ear. It should’ve been a literal dream come true.
A half step back and I rubbed my hands up and down his arms. “It’s really fine. I’m sorry for…” Humiliating us both? “Everything.”
“You don’t have to apologize. I mean it,” he emphasized when I shook my head. “Just… please don’t say anything. Even to Sam. Especially to Sam. I’m gonna tell them all when I’m ready, I think.”
Huge, massive sigh. “I won’t. I promise.”
And I never did. Not really.
68 notes · View notes
obetrolncocktails · 1 year
Text
Make Me Your Master | Josh Kiszka X Reader
Tumblr media
Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI semi-public sex, oral sex (f. Receiving), Male Sub, Fem. Dom, guided masturbation, dirty talk, graphic descriptions of sex, face sitting, pet names, orgasm denial. JOSH SUB. CHAIN HARNESS. Josh titty sucking :)
Word Count: 4.5K
A/N: Whew! It's been a while! This was super fun to write! I wanted this dynamic to seem real, and less like a typically overworked sub/dom relationship. I feel like Josh would express his submission most in his worship of his partner, doing whatever he needs to to please them.
Summary: Damn, damn damn his stylists to hell! Who in their right mind would dress Josh in a harness, let alone one made of chains. Hell, they barely dressed him at all. You couldn't take it. You had to do something about it. Now.
You felt like an exaggerated cartoon character staring at him like you were–like if you dared to look for much longer, everyone would see the drool slipping out from between your lips and down your chin. Coming back to your senses, you cleared your throat and straightened your stance, choosing to lean against the nearest wall as the band’s stylists worked on Josh’s newest outfit for their upcoming music video. They pulled on the already-taut chains that contoured his chest and back so beautifully, adjusting them even tighter so that they would sit securely against his skin. From where you stood, you could see the metal pushing into the softness of his chest, creating noticeable divots. The sight shot blood pumping through your lower body. As a result, heat exploded up your neck and into your cheeks. 
“Are you listening?” You heard someone say distantly, but the words didn’t instantly make sense to you. “Y/n. Babe. Hey.” It was Josh who spoke, stepping forward toward you. 
“Sorry, I just zoned out for a second,” you muttered while running your fingers through your hair, trying your best to casually play it off. 
“What do you think?” He asked, pulling his fingers up to his body, touching the chains and crystals that adorned his chest. “This shit is so tight.” He looked up at you waiting for your opinion. Fuck-It’s not tight enough, you thought. But I know how to fix that. “Is it too much?” He asked, turning to look in the closest mirror. Josh, you’re barely dressed, it’s not enough…you wanted to laugh. Your words were unusually sparse. “Yeah I think it’s too much,” he said, but you snapped out of your stupor to grab him back by his wrist. 
“No!” You said way too loudly. The stylists glanced up at you as they packed away their items. “I mean, it looks great on you,” you admitted, pulling him against you by his bare waist. You bit at your lip, grinning at him, hoping to God he’d read the room properly. “Possibly too good,” you added in a sultry tone, your fingers dancing upon the chains and gems that dangled just above his nipples. You let your gaze drop to your fingers, then raised it very slowly again, catching Josh watching your lips, his face relaxing, but his eyebrows raising with interest. He cleared his throat, looking around the room at the stylists and then back at you. Luckily, Danny had walked in before anything else had to be said. 
“Josh,” Danielle said, raising her chin as she addressed him. “We’re gonna work on Danny for a few minutes. We’ll call you to make final adjustments and then you can go home,” she said. “But don’t run too far away.” You silently slid your hand off of his chest and down to his hand, squeezing it firmly while she spoke. He squeezed your hand back in response, turning his chin just slightly to acknowledge that he understood your silent demand.
“I won’t, I promise,” he said, stepping closer to exit, but you took initiative and practically yanked him out of the dressing room, smiling at the stylists while they grinned back at you, knowing exactly what they had done to you. 
“They know,” Josh said as you pulled him into the hallway. 
“I don’t care,” you snipped, reaching up to his chest to loop your fingers craftily through the chains of his harness, pulling him in for a needy and lustful kiss. He reciprocated instantly, his hands resting softly on your hips as you took charge of what you wanted. 
“Not in the hallway,” He said, evading your lips momentarily to look further down the hall, watching as crew members drifted between rooms. You let him lead you to a new room, his fingers pawing at every doorknob, cursing when they were locked. He pulled another and it opened, the first successful attempt for privacy. Your eyes flitted behind you for a final moment before slipping into the room. Four walls enclosed around you, tighter than you had expected. As you flipped on the light, you realized that it was one of the stylist’s offices. 
“Fuck–” you cursed, reading name plaque on the desk. Jennifer Margera. “Well, Mrs. Margera, I’m so sorry.” You mumbled, turning to lock the door before pushing a layer of papers off of the table top. You turned Josh’s body so that he could sit on the edge of the desk. 
“Are you though?” Josh asked, getting comfortable in his assigned spot, a swath of flowy, cream-colored silk cloaked his scantily-clad body. You pulled at the softness of the fabric, using the tips of your fingers to delicately remove it. 
“Not in the slightest,” You admitted while you worked. “Arms up,” You commanded, tapping his bicep. He appeased you, lifting his arms above his head. Your eyes fell to the masculine crop of hair that grew under his arms, arousal growing between your legs. Josh had always turned you on. He could do it without uttering a single word, and the worst part was that he knew it. He could be masculine and dominant at times, telling you exactly what he wanted and showing you how he would get it–but at other times, his uniquely-feminine qualities would appear in the most intimate moments, the gentle curves of his body pairing with the strength of his muscles. The most sexually satisfying moments for you were ones when he would helplessly bend to your will, so desperate for your attention and touch that he’d do whatever he had to do to get it. 
“You like what they put me in, don’t you Mama?” He asked, the corners of his lips curling slightly upward. Normally you’d roll your eyes at his use of the nickname, but in the moment, you took it as a signal of submission. 
“You look incredible,” you said, tossing the material to the floor. Stepping in between his legs, your fingertips grazed slowly down his bare midriff. You lowered your eyes to watch his skin erupt all over with goosebumps. “What is it, Josh?” You asked, adding a sensuous quality to your voice. You lowered yourself slowly into a squat, placing your hands on his thighs. “What’s on your mind, baby?” you asked him. 
“My cock,” he said frankly, grinning. He’s proud of himself. 
“Isn’t that unfortunate,” You said, standing up and backing away. “Guess you’ll have to fix that yourself.”
“Y/n come on,” he said, standing up off of the desk. You charged forward. 
“Don’t you dare.” You took him into your grasp by his chains once again, pulling your face just in front of his, your lips hovering just above his. “You want me to fix it? You do what I say, when I say it. Do you understand?” You asked, looking at him intently. “I said,” You repeated once more, reaching your free hand down to firmly grip his cock. “Do you understand me?” 
He nodded enthusiastically. “Yes.” He said, his voice strained. 
“Yes, what?” You asked, skillfully using your thumb to rub along what you could feel of his shaft. 
“Y-Yes ma’am,” he said finally. You released your grip once you were satisfied. 
“Sit back down, I want to look at you.” He moved wordlessly to his previous position, sitting on the edge of the desk. “Now…” You said, stepping forward, your eyes skimming over his body. “Let me help move things along.” You reached for the waistband of the flowy white pants they had dressed him in, peeling them from his body, grateful when they slipped off into a pile on the floor. “Now aren’t these pretty,” you said, pulling at his silken underwear. “Pretty little panties,” you added, gleefully watching crimson flush wash upon his neck and into his face. You let them roll down his thighs and off of his legs, dropping them to the floor. 
“Touch yourself for me, baby boy,” you told him. “You look so pretty.” 
“T- touch myself?” He asked, his eyebrows raising. You weren’t so sure why he was suddenly so tentative. Maybe because you were giving him the direct order. 
“Need something to look at, honey?” You asked, offering a syrupy-sweet tone. You pulled at the hem of your shirt, pulling it up over your head, and let it drop to the floor. “Tell me how you’d touch me, Josh. Tell me while you touch yourself.”
You watched as he took his semi-erect cock in his hand, beginning to stroke it slowly. His expression was beginning to relax as he watched you standing in front of him. He pressed his teeth down into his bottom lip for an extended moment before speaking. “I’d take your tits in my hands, and squeeze them, pinching your nipples between my fingers.” 
You took his cue, lifting your hands to remove your bra, dropping it into the heap on the floor. You wouldn’t tell him, but in this unfamiliar room, you felt more exposed than you usually would. It wouldn’t matter though, because the amount of arousal that flooded your system was far more potent than the distant worry that loomed about. You pulled your hands to your breasts, kneading them just as Josh would, pinching your nipples firmly between the knuckles of your fingers, letting him watch. “What next, baby boy?” You asked. He grinned at the name. You watched him fuck his hand, his thumb working against his rigid shaft, pressing in against his skin to add the right amount of friction. 
“I’d slip my hand down into your pants and finger your clit, just to get you going. Let me watch you do it this time, Mama.” He bit his bottom lip again, adjusting himself on the desk to rest on his inactive hand, his head tilting as he relaxed into pleasuring himself. 
“You want to watch me finger my clit?” You asked, echoing him. “I’d be happy to.” You brought four fingers to your lips, licking them before sliding them into your leggings and underwear, locating your clit easily. “And how would your fingers work, Josh?” You asked, taking a step or two forward closer to him. “How would you finger my pussy?” 
He raised an eyebrow, obviously enthused. “Usually it would be my tongue-fucking your clit, but since I can’t do that–”
You reached for his face, grabbing hold of his chin gruffly. “That’s not what I asked, pretty boy. Are you going to obey or are you going to be a smart ass?” You loved this act–of feeling in control, especially over Josh. At times he possessed such submissive qualities, that it was difficult to get through the day without daydreaming of instances exactly like this. 
“I’ll be good, I promise,” He said, grateful when you released your grip on him. He was still grinning, but that would change later when he’d beg to cum and you would do everything except appease him. 
“So, my little pet–answer the question. How would you finger my clit, hm?” You asked again. 
“I’d spin my fingers in slow circles around it.” He said, letting his mouth drop slightly open from the pleasure of touching himself. “I’d taste you, putting my fingers in my mouth.” You raised your eyebrows, your lips curling upward. You liked what he had to say. “You taste so good, Mama.” 
“What next?” you asked, doing as he had said, rolling spirals around your swelling clit. You pulled your fingertips out of your pants and inserted them into your mouth, tasting your own slick before bringing them back down. 
“Fuck–” he murmured under his breath, watching you with sagging eyelids. 
“You wish it were you, don’t you?” You asked him, chuckling softly. He nodded, licking his lips. 
“I can be nice,” You added, stepping forward and repeating the process again, pulling your fingers to his lips. “Open up.” You tapped his lips, stopping to slide your fingertips onto his tongue as he opened his mouth. “Suck on them.” He closed his lips around your fingers, his tongue working around them to taste you. His voice rumbled against your fingers as he hummed, immersing himself in the moment. You pulled them out of his mouth. 
“I want to see more. Please.” He said, his voice coming out in almost a whimper. 
“More? And how do you get more?” You asked, guiding him further. 
“Please take your pants off. And your panties. I need to see you. All of you.” His eyes sparkled with intensity, his voice pitching upward as he pleaded. 
“Mm, Good answer.” You reached for your leggings and underwear, pulling them down both at once, kicking them to the side with the other discarded clothing. “Let me help you see better.” Stepping around the desk, you pulled the chair out from underneath it and rolled it back around to rest in front of Josh. You lowered yourself upon it, spreading your legs wider for him to see. 
“But first, hands on your thighs.” 
“What?” He asked, confused. 
“Stop touching yourself. Put your hands on your thighs while you watch. If you slip up just once, we stop, get dressed and leave.”
“No, no, Mama. I’ll be a good boy, I swear.”  He gave in to submission, his hands releasing from his cock to rest flat on his thighs. You watched as his hardness throbbed and twitched almost involuntarily. It set you dripping.
“You’re such a good boy,” you said, returning your attention to yourself, smoothing your fingers over your belly and on down. “Speak to me baby. How would you like Mama to touch herself, hm? It’s all here for you.” 
“I would finger fuck you so well, Mama. I’d make sure you’d get whatever you want, especially with that beautiful clit of yours. I wish I was sucking on it right now.” You let your fingers slide back down in between your folds, feeling the increasing amount of slick coating your fingers. You pinched your middle fingers against your clit, squeezing your core muscles against the sensations that arose from the pressure.
“You know how to say exactly the right thing, my little prince. I’m practically dripping.” You spun slow spirals into your clit, biting your bottom lip as you scooched your lower body forward onto the chair, leaning backward so that he could see an unobstructed view of your pussy. 
“Fuck, you’re so beautiful, Mama. Let me touch you, please. I’ll do anything,” He said, his tone turning more insistent and whiny. 
“Anything?” You asked him, moving to insert a finger into your opening, curling upward. It was good, but not nearly as good as Josh would or could be. 
“Anything,” he swallowed. You watched his Adam’s Apple bob up and down. Your eyes traveled along the chains and crystals that adorned his bare chest, and you admired the way they pressed into his soft, supple, but strong physique. You let your gaze fall further until they landed between his legs, watching the tip of his cock drip, momentarily abandoned. 
“Tell me what you’d do.” You said, using your fingers to spread open your pussy, playfully inserting your fingers into your mouth, dripping wet saliva on them and returning them downward to please yourself. 
“I’d eat your pussy so good that I’d forget about my cock, Mama. I just want to make you feel good. I’d cum without touching myself, I just know it.” The way he spoke to you reminded you of a child begging for five extra minutes of playtime. You loved that he was trying to bargain with you in order to touch you. 
“Aw, poor thing,” you said. “You want to eat Mommy’s pussy so badly that you’d give up cumming just for a taste?” He nodded, eyeing you pleadingly, his eyes sparkling with hope that you’d give in. 
“On your knees.” You ordered, standing up, pushing the chair away from you, opening more space on the floor of the office. He moved from the desk quickly, getting in place on the carpet below you. He placed his hands back on his thighs for further instruction. The way he sat reminded you of an eager puppy dog, the way their eyes train on you, following your every move until you pay them the attention they’re owed. 
“I’ll give you a taste,” You told him. “Promise you’ll do a good job?” You asked, stepping forward to hover above him. The way he looked up at you spun your core in knots. 
“I’m only ever here to please you, to serve you,” he said, bringing his hands up to rest on your bare thighs. You let him touch you with no punishment—you’d be half-way conscious in a matter of moments anyway. You knew he’d leave you seizing against his face as he had so many times, and you would never get enough of it. 
“Then show me how well you serve your master,” you spoke, taking the final step forward, his face and neck inclining upward instantly to seamlessly connect with your body.
His tongue was strong but so gentle as he parted your folds for the first time, dragging it along your sensitive skin. You felt his facial hair scratching along the outer edges of your pussy, which only added to the ecstasy of having a man in between your legs—an extremely sexy man, who was submissively under your control, but effortlessly domineering when it came to fucking you. You could both pretend, and it would be fun in the moment, but you were foolish to believe that the man below you couldn’t make you cum in mere minutes. He held the power like a hidden ace, and you were very-well aware of it. He still let you play the game, enjoying the bratty names and power play. 
Josh pressed his face against you as you stood over him, and you grounded yourself, squatting lower so that gravity worked in your favor as he continued to eat your pussy. “Use your tongue,” you ordered. “So many girls watch you while you sing. They know you eat pussy well. Too bad they don’t have you between their legs.” You ground your pussy against his face, feeling his tongue working in wide loops against every surface. He took the risk of teasing your clit, avoiding contact for as long as he dared before flicking the strong tip of his tongue against it in fast spurts. In moments where it felt like you couldn’t take much more without cumming, he’d flee from your clit to lap up the juices that would collect at your entrance. You felt him humming against your skin as if you had prepared him a delicious meal to eat, his hot breath sweeping over your thighs when he’d come up gasping for air. 
“Fuck–” you moaned quietly, licking your lips as you processed the pleasure coursing though your body. “Fuck, that feels amazing.” He looked up at you with an almost innocent smile, his eyes sparkling with fervor as he licked his lips. 
“Am I doing a good job?” He asked you, rubbing his hands up your thighs and sides. You nodded quietly. 
“Keep going, baby. Do your job.” You said, trying your best to regain your authoritative demeanor. He was eager to please, his hands glued to your thighs as he spread them further apart, forcing you further down into the squat. 
“Don’t worry, Mama. Relax,” He told you. “I’ve got you.” He somehow read your mind, knowing that you’d feel self-conscious in this precarious, unbalanced position. Soon enough he’d have you teetering out of balance, the only thing keeping you upright being his strong arms. You breathed in deeply, letting him return to his pace. You felt him slip his tongue into your opening with no hesitation, fucking you with the tip as his fingers beared further into your skin. You let your back arch where you stood, squeezing your muscles against his face. He was an expert at this, and his confidence showed you that he knew it, too. You closed your eyes, reaching down to place your hands on his for a moment, showing him silent satisfaction. He removed one of his hands after a moment and brought it between your legs, inserting them into your opening, and moving his tongue back up to your swollen clit. 
“Jesus–fuck!” You hissed through your teeth, bringing your hands up to your tits, squeezing them in your hands, your nipples hard and erect against your palms. Josh had wrapped his free arm around your body, his hand splayed open against your ass and back as he pulled you firmly against his face. You felt his tongue and lips undulating wildly against your pussy, his fingers curling with abandon against your inner walls. Wet, sloppy noises filled the room, and you knew that they definitely could be heard in the hallway if someone were listening intently. “Oh my god!” You whimpered far too loudly, slamming your palm against your lips as you remembered where you were, the ecstasy flowing through your system far too immense for you to downplay any longer. 
Josh heaved a breath, coming up briefly for air. “Cum for me, Mama. Please cum all over my face. I want to taste you when you finish over my tongue.” His face was red with friction, his lips close to chafing. He didn’t care for an instant. His face would look completely fucked-out by the time he returned to the dressing room, but he didn’t care. He didn’t serve the stylists, only you. He wiped his lips casually before centering himself again underneath you, returning to your pulsing core. This time, he focused solely on your clit, using his agile tongue to flutter skillfully against the bud, sending your body climbing through a mountain-excursion, purposefully releasing his touch from you to pull you back down from the summit so that the very next time it would be even more intense. 
Your body quaked against your will, momentarily stealing with it most of your power over him. Josh was a submissive lover most of the time, but when it came to doing his job, he’d be sure to make you cum in ways you had never experienced with anyone else. He worked your pussy like it was a sacrament–something to be relished and celebrated, and you’d do nothing to stop him from doing exactly that. “Fuck-f–” you sputtered, feeling your hips beginning to buck instinctively, your body barreling toward the apex of climax. Your skin began to prickle with sweat from exertion and you felt your hair beginning to stick limply to your forehead and cheeks. “Josh! Josh–please–” You groaned in skittering gurgles that poured weakly from your throat. Your dominant tone had diminished to nothing, replaced with thin and pathetic whines that snatched away the demanding quality you had previously possessed. You knew that you’d regain power and composure, but you were too far gone in the moment to even consider it. 
Josh’s tongue moved faster and stronger than ever, his lips buzzing against your clit, his hands wrapped around your hips in a silent dare for you to move away from him. Your legs weakened above him, your thighs shuddering and squeezing tightly against his face. You collapsed forward on yourself, grateful for the strength of Josh’s grip on your body. You reached down, pulling and yanking at his hair, in a half hearted attempt for him to pull away from you, but he wouldn’t until he felt you finally cum–and even then, you knew he’d take his time lapping up the product of the orgasm, and you’d let him as a reward for a job well done. When he began to shake his head back and forth, his tongue contorting and flicking wildly, you knew you were done for. You finally let your eyes roll backward and you gave in to the torrent of sexual agony that roared through your entire body, leaving you to quiver pathetically above the one you had supposedly claimed was your subordinate. His tongue slowed, but he did not stop; instead, he moved lower to your entrance, lapping up and savoring the climax that leaked from you, diligent to not waste a single drop. 
“Holy fucking shit,” You said through a heaving sigh, pushing him away from you so that you could regain your breath. You had expected to see it, but you hadn’t prepared for the way he would look when he came up for air himself. The makeup that the stylists had applied was severely smudged–embarrassingly so. His face and lips were rubbed raw, and his hair had been pulled and yanked out of its styled appearance, making it impossible for anyone to not catch on to what had happened behind this closed door. 
“Oh my God, your face,” You chuckled, reaching for him as he rose from the floor. 
“I don’t care,” he said this time. “That was fucking worth it,” he grinned, pressing his lips together. “My lips are numb.” He said, pulling his thumb to swipe along his mouth. 
“Let me show you how much I appreciate you for your amazing work,” You said, walking him back to the desk. “Sit. Let me take care of you, Baby.” He wordlessly did as he was asked, sitting on the edge of the table, waiting for you. To your amazement, he was still hard between his legs. “You loved tasting me, didn’t you, hm?” You asked, reaching forward to hover your lips above his, surprising him by taking his cock in your hand. 
“I loved it so much,” He said lustfully, his gaze fixed on your lips as you increased the pressure of your hand against his cock. “Can I please kiss you?” He asked, his head tilting forward, drawn by some kind of magnetism. You appeased his request, letting him fall into your kiss easily, his head bobbing and tilting as you touched him. You parted from the kiss, lowering yourself in front of him. You were sure he was expecting a blow job, but you evaded that expectation by moving to his chest to suckle on his round, erect nipples. You made a show of flicking your eyes upward through your lashes as you fluttered the tip of your tongue against his hard nipple, eventually closing your mouth around it to suckle upon it. He groaned deeply, the sounds escaping his throat in deep, raspy strains. Josh let his head tip backward as he closed his eyes, his hands moving to rest upon your shoulders. 
“Josh! I know you’re in there,” someone almost shouted on the other side of the door as they knocked forcefully on it, sending you springing away from Josh. It was Danny. “They’ve been trying to call your phone for the last fifteen minutes. Finish up whatever you’re doing and come on.” 
“Fuck,” You whispered dejectedly, reaching for his clothing. 
“It’s okay, Mama. To be continued…” he said, hopping off of the desk. 
“If you act right,” you said, with a wink. “You’ll just have to wait a little longer.” You bit your bottom lip, scheming up ideas for how you’d tease him until you’d finally give him his well-earned reward. 
End of Part 1.
If you would like to be added to my taglist, fill out the form!
taglist: @doodle417 @watchingovergvf2 @pr41sethemoon @fireandsaltydogs @capturethechaos@andromeda-raine-gvf @writingcold @sammyfuckingkiszka@positivegvfthings @ace-harrington @gvfvanfleet @flo-gvf @sacredthefran @jjwrites @nocuts-nobutts-andgvf @jmkho @joshsindigostreak @gold-mines-melting @allieisacrybaby @sammysprincess@gretavansara @dannythedog@demolitionndann @gretasmokerising @shesawomaninadream @sonicbaptism @vixenstail @hearts-hunger @malany-gvf @spark-my-nature @hellowgoodbye @cal-a-bungaa @rhythm-of-space
427 notes · View notes
anthemofgvf · 1 year
Text
Ceilings ~ Josh Kiszka x Reader Fanfiction:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
“lovely to just lay here with you. you’re kinda cute, and i would say all of this, but i don’t want to ruin the moment.”
description: to have your best friend be a world-wide sensation was one thing, but to secretly be in love with him was another. when josh is on a short break from tour and so happens to be back in town, you feel it is necessary to communicate your feelings before you don't get the chance.
trope: friends to lovers
warnings under cut...
warnings: fluff-lots of it, mentions of alcohol usage, swearing, angst, smut (18+ minors dni!!)
word count: 5.7k
a/n: my first fanfiction AND first Josh fic of many to come. I hope you all enjoy!
---
Ever since high school, you and Josh were attached at the hip. Not as much as him and his twin, but as close as you possibly could be. You would often help him with his films whenever he needed it, or just stood to the side to watch him direct. And, when he decided to form a band with his brothers and their best friend Danny, you would attend their small shows in Frankenmuth and often sit in as they recorded songs and whatnot.
After a while, they skyrocketed into a global phenomenon and their sophomore album was barely released as they took on the roads and traveled the world.
You would follow them on their earlier tours, but it eventually conflicted with your work schedule, and traveling outside of the U.S. was not on your itinerary. You'd often receive calls from the boys, mainly Josh, discussing the show afterwards and places they've seen as they explored the new destinations on their tour.
You always knew you had some sort of feelings for Josh, whether it was platonic or not, your heart fluttered at the sight of his infamous, toothy smile, or when he'd make a charismatic joke. No matter the circumstance, your eyes always fell on your best friend, and your thoughts would linger of ideas about you and him. Hell, even his name would pop up in your brain whenever your mind was blank.
Honestly, everything reminded you of him.
But there was no possible way you and him could ever be together exclusively. He never showed signs of wanting more than a friendship. Sure, he was always affectionate towards you in any way he could be, but that was just Josh. He was like that with everybody, stranger or not.
You missed him every day he was off on tour. Didn't matter if he called you that night, which he tried to message and call you as much as he could, your heart still ached for his presence. Simple calls shared between you two were not enough to fill the void that curated in your heart.
The worst kinds of things he would say?
"I miss you." "I'm ecstatic to see you." "We can do whatever you want as soon as I get back, I promise." "Only a few more days."
All of it was normal things Josh would say on your phone calls, but him reminding you that there were only a few days left until he was back in Frankenmuth made the week feel like an eternity.
But when the day struck that he was finally coming home, you couldn't contain your excitement. You flew out of your bed and quickly got ready, awaiting his arrival in your living room of your small apartment. Waiting for a knock, a phone call, anything.
Your leg tapped vigorously on the wooden floor and bit at your cuticles as you continuously checked the time, counting down the minutes until his apparent arrival. He told you the night prior that he'd bring you to his mom's house, as they were having a small gathering with family to celebrate their arrival and the short period of time they'd be home before back on the road.
Knock knock.
The taps on your door nearly gave you whiplash and had you jump out of your skin as you bounced off your couch and reminded yourself not to run to the door, but to walk steadily.
You opened the door and saw Josh standing in a white shirt and khaki shorts with messy curls resting on his head, sporting a bright smile on his face and open arms the second he saw you.
And you jumped into his arms and embraced him tightly, wrapping your arms around his neck as he held you close to his chest with a soft chuckle.
"Hi Josh." You mumbled into his shoulder.
No matter how long it had been, which it had been a few months since you've seen him, did you ever grow tired of his natural musk that made you swoon. Something about the way he held you close to his body made your heart jump out of your body and beat against his chest as a strong sign that you just wanted to be in his arms 'til the end of time.
"Hi y/n," He breathed back as he began to rub your back slowly.
"I've missed you, Josh. I've missed you so much."
"Missed you more," he pulled away from your body as he kept his hands on your back. "How's the old town holding up?"
"Same as always. Hasn't changed a bit." You giggled, releasing your arms from his neck as his hands fell to his sides.
He nodded with a hum, looking down the hall and meeting your gaze with a soft smile.
"Ready?"
-
You hopped into Josh's white jeep as he drove you to Karen's. You were practically family, often staying over at their house when you didn't feel like going home, or just hanging around whenever you could when you two were younger. Like previously stated, you and Josh were nearly attached at the hip.
You turned your head to Josh, who was focused on the road, tapping on his steering wheel with his index finger to the soft music that filled the quiet car.
"Have you missed home?" You asked.
"I always do. Was nice to see my mama." He flicked his eyes at you before re-focusing on the road.
"You've always been such a momma's boy." You smirked at him.
"And there's not a problem with that!" He exclaimed with a toothy grin. "But I still missed you. Not as much as my family, but y'know." He shrugged after telling his sarcastic joke.
"So, you're still an asshole?" You poked back at him.
"Some things never change, y/n." He pointed at you. "Assholery is in my blood."
"God," you laughed, "sometimes you're a little unbearable."
"Ouch!" He pretended to be offended, slapping his hand flat onto his chest with a soft chuckle after.
You pulled into the driveway of Josh's familiar childhood home and followed Josh into the house, where everyone had already gathered and had seemed to have been waiting on your arrival. They all had plates of food, laughing and chatting about something Jake had said pertaining the tour.
A feeling in your chest rose as you were brought back in time for a split second, remembering sitting at the very dining table that sat across the room, joining the Kiszkas almost every week for dinner and talking about school. The innocence of it all almost made you teary-eyed, reminiscing about your chats with Josh in the backyard and his dreams of traveling the world someday with his brothers and becoming a star.
It's funny how some dreams become a reality, and you sit on the sidelines and watch them bloom.
Karen quickly walked over to you and squeezed you, commenting on how it's been too long and that she's missed you. Then Jake with a small hug, then Sam, Danny, Veronica, and Jake's girlfriend Jita.
As the night went on, you eagerly listened to the boys discussing their favorite stories from tour, the plans for the next few weeks for shows, and more. Josh usually led the conversations - he always did, in fact. He was a talker, a huge one. Especially at home where he felt most comfortable. God, you could listen to him talk for hours. It could be utter nonsense and you'd still actively tune your attention to him always.
When the moon fully lit the sky, shimmering down on the freshly cut blades of green gas in the backyard, slowly people started to drift onto their own things. Danny saying his goodbyes first, then Sam and Jake ran off to wherever along with their sister and Jita, and you were somehow left in the living room with Josh.
"Feels great to be home." Josh spoke, looking at you.
"I bet. Those long nights away from home can be difficult sometimes." You responded to him.
They were hard for you, too. Every time he would say goodbye, it was harder to say it back. To slowly forget his voice until he would call you again or to lose understanding of what his touch felt like. You would have to constantly remind yourself of those small things and moments you didn't want to break free from your mind, even though it didn't matter what you thought. He only saw you as his friend, a purely platonic friendship, and you were sure he saw and met his fair share of perfect women on tour. Girls that were better than you. It was difficult to not think about what he was doing, who he was with while on tour. Thankfully, worked kept you occupied. But on the slow hours in your office job, your mind kept wandering to scenarios of him and some girl.
"Y/n?" Josh placed his hand on your shoulder.
"Hm? Yeah?" You frantically met his gaze.
"You were spaced out for a moment there," he smiled, "everything alright?"
No, everything wasn't alright. You were only going to be spending a few days with him before he was gone for another month or so, and who knows for how long would he stay after that?
But, why burden him with your silly thoughts? "Yeah, I'm fine. Just...thinking."
"Care to tell?" He removed his back from the couch, folding his hands together as he leaned forward to find your wandering eyes.
"It's...it's just-I don't know." You shook your head with a shrug, turning your direction away from him as he watched you tentatively.
"Come on." He pushed himself off the couch with a groan, holding his hand out for you to grab. With a small smile, and flushed cheeks, your hand melted into his and he dragged you up to his childhood bedroom and out through the window, and onto the roof.
Back in high school, you and Josh would often sit on his roof and breathe in the fresh air as the stars twinkled upon you and him. You and him would just spill your guts up there. Sometimes you two shared drinks, maybe a joint, but the main point was that it was the only spot that somehow seemed to get something off yours or his chest.
It became your favorite spot in the entire house. It was the only place that you had truly become vulnerable with Josh and see his true emotions. He was never uncomfortable with his feelings, but he made it seem like you were the only person, other than his twin, that knew the darkest secrets he held in his sacred mind.
He sat only a few inches from you, resting on his forearms as he admired the stars dance in the luminous night sky. He had a relaxed demeanor as always, but you, you had your legs pressed to your chest with your arms around them securely, trying to focus on something else than the thought of admitting how you felt towards Josh.
"Y'know, I remember when we were up here once, had a few too many drinks and such. You were talking about something that I can't seem to remember, but whatever it was, it made you vomit all over this roof." He started to laugh as his eyes hit you.
"Was probably talking about how sick I felt after playing one too many games of beer pong against you." You rolled your eyes in a playful manner.
"You always lost." He continued his light laughter.
"Yeah, yeah, who will be laughing when they get pushed off this roof?" You cocked your head at him with a teasing expression.
"Hey, I was just stating the facts." He shrugged with a sly smirk as you pushed his shoulder.
You looked back up to the sky, reminiscing on the faint memory and trying to clear your mind of that aching, pressuring feeling to say something more sentimental than usual, to tell Josh how much you really missed him, hell, to show him how much you missed him.
Knowing you for so long, Josh picked up on the little things. He knew when you were truly content, when something was on your mind; all of it. And he noticed that your chipper demeanor was off, and how your eyes lightly flickered back and forth to show you were thinking of something. How you would go longer than usual without blinking because your mind was in a trance.
"Alright, it's bugging the hell outta me. What's up?" Josh sat up as he spoke with a lowered voice, close to a whisper.
"Nothing, I'm fine, Josh. Just...taking in the night, that's all." You lied as you gave him a fake reassuring smile and nod before turning your direction back to the sky.
"I know there's something on your mind, y/n. You're not good at hiding it."
You swallowed, fluttering your eyes shut as you deeply inhaled the warm summer air to contain any sensitive emotions from rising.
Josh scooted closer to you, leaning his head forward to find your eyes as you rested your cheek on your knees.
"It's nothing, really." You flicked your eyes to him and held contact with his brown eyes that shimmered under the ethereal moonlight. "It's...just stupid." You mumbled.
"I'm sure whatever it is, it isn't stupid. I'm not one to pry, but it's bothering me knowing something is off." His lips downturned. "Although you don't have to tell me exactly what you're thinking about, you could try to at least share the basis of whatever it is for me."
You lightly chuckled, finding it in you to softly smile at the perfect sight in front of you, rather than to cry. Anything to stop your eyes from welling with tears and curate a knot that bubbled in your throat.
"Well, I don't know. I guess I've just missed this a lot, y'know?" You grazed your lips with your tongue.
"The roof?" Josh joked.
"Yeah, the fucking roof." You rolled your eyes. "No, I've missed...well, I've missed you, a lot. Don't get to see you often anymore." You shrugged.
Josh pulled you into his side, wrapping his arms around you as he circled your back with his cool fingers. His eyes rested on your head as he waited for you to speak, to continue. To wait for you to look up at him once more.
"I can assure you that I've missed you a lot more. It's not the same on tour without you. I'm not the only one who thinks that way, frankly. Sometimes Jake and I will have small conversations of things that we see that we think you'd like or remind us of you. I'm always thinking about you on the road, y/n." He motioned with his hand outwards, then placing it beside him.
You turned your head upwards as you grew the courage to meet his eyes, and you saw through the moonlight his soft, affectionate smile that made your heart sink into your stomach.
"You're just saying that to make me feel better." You released a breathy laugh.
"Why would I lie to you?" He furrowed his brows. "Why do you think I call and text you every day? Don't do it just because I think you'll be upset if I choose not to. I do it because I want to."
All you could do was lose yourself in Josh's eyes with your mouth slightly parted. What could you say to not ruin the moment? Or should you just come clean? Your head began to pound with different responses and words, both your heart and head fighting for a say in your next words, your next move.
"You mean it?" Was all you could say. You still couldn't push away the feeling that this all was too good to be true.
Sure, you've been in Josh's arms before, but not like this. Not where you two seemed to be sharing the same intimate air and expressing the same intimate feelings. Something just felt different about this interaction between you and your best friend. It was like for a moment you forgot he was just your friend, and nothing more.
"Of course. Sometimes I think about just asking you to join us on tour despite you saying you can't because of work." He continued to rub your back.
"Yeah, work always gets in the way. It's a normal person struggle."
Josh chuckled at your comment, lifting his chin as he shined a toothy smile.
"I'm sure you could somehow find a way to take a few weeks off."
"A few weeks?" You scoffed. "Not that easy, Josh."
"Unfortunate, real unfortunate." He shook his head. "Still should think about it, though."
You rolled your eyes in a playful manner, flashing a soft smile.
You took a few moments to regain your thoughts, take a few breaths before speaking. You knew coming onto this roof where you two would always sit would bring everything out of you. And Josh knew it, too. It was like a secret key to unlocking your mind.
"You know I would in a heartbeat, Josh. Not a day goes by that I'm not thinking about you." You swallowed.
Of course, you missed him, but the sincerity in your words let Josh relax his face into a warm grin and had seemed to relieve any tension in his body, if any.
"You...you think about me every day?" He needed reassurance, too. For holding such an easy-going, nerve free exterior, his heart began to race, and his ears began to burn with fire. His eyes lit up with excitement, he waited impatiently for a response.
Your two organs came to an agreement to let you release your internal thoughts into a word vomit. "Of course, I do, Josh. Always count down the days until you come back home and wait impatiently for you to call me. Even when you're here I'm still thinking about you, which is stupid because you're a few minutes away and I can just stop by, but I don't want to be a burden to you. But when you leave again, God, it's hard. I cry myself to sleep because I know it'll be a century until I see you again and we can hang out like old times. Stare at my fucking ceiling on those days of sleepless nights just feeling so...so empty because you're gone. Doesn't matter if it's for a few days or a few months. It's all the same to me."
Your eyes widened as you seemed to regain conscious of your surroundings and could feel your heart banging against your chest as a cry for help and ringing in your ears, for you to just shut up. But you were too late. Your eyes began to burn while your vision became blurry, blinking away the tears to make out Josh's facial expression.
But all he could do was just look at you, stunned. Shocked. Surprised that you felt this way because he always knew what you were feeling and what you were thinking. But this, this was something you were able to keep away from him for such a long time. And now that it was finally in the air and slammed into his chest, all he could do was look at you in mere astonishment.
He lifted his hand to your cheek to wipe away your fallen tears with his thumb and lifted your chin. He held your eyes with his own, before glancing at your lips and fluttering his eyes shut to place a soft, tender peck on your shaky lips.
The quick loss of his lips on yours ignited something in you, something you've never felt before. You grew hungry, starved as if he was essential to your survival.
You placed your hand on his cheek as you brought him back onto your lips, sharply inhaling as you two shared a passionate kiss under the stars. From a bird's eye view, this scene was cinematic. It was too good to be real. You seemed to have blacked out, but no, it was all reality.
His lips colliding with yours, you savored every sense, every feeling that circulated in your entire being as you desperately tried to deepen the kiss. His mouth fit onto yours like it was a missing puzzle piece that you’ve been trying to find for years. And now that he was finally showing you his reciprocation of your feelings, your heart gave in to all those thoughts that had only seemed to be a silly reoccurring dream.
Your hand crawled into his curls as you held him against your lips, and he held you as close as he could comfortably. Your senses had seemed to have heightened, as you could taste the peppermint that rested on his tongue, his natural scent. The air that blew sweet nothings throughout the sky and into your clothes. How hot your body grew as the kiss deepened. How your heartrate seemed to have relaxed to a soft melodic beat that matched Josh's. How right it felt to be kissing your best friend. How the void in your heart seemed to have been completely rid of, and you felt complete.
Josh unlocked his lips from yours, planting his forehead onto yours as you two shared inconsistent breathing patterns. You found one of your hands under his shirt, and slowly dragged it down to his thigh as you shut your eyes to breathe in his air.
"Josh." Was all you could mutter through your breaths.
“How long have you felt this way?” He whispered with half-hooded eyes.
“Since I’ve met you. I always have felt this way.” You met his eyes to the best of your ability, looking at him with a softened gaze that only proved your words truthful and sincere.
He placed a soft kiss on your head, as if to tell you without words that he understood and thought the exact same way as you, running his hand through your hair delicately before he stood up and lend his hand to you to pull you up, and lead you back into his room.
Jake wasn't there, and hopefully wouldn't come back, because the lust in Josh's eyes became more apparent than before, and you two could barely keep each other from melting into each other's bodies and losing your hands in each other's soft, heated skin.
You found yourself flat on your back on Josh's bed, parting your mouth with his and following a steady pattern that only made you ache for more.
You tugged your shirt over your head and broke the kiss only for a moment, before clashing your mouth onto his again. His hand walked alongst the side of your torso, gripping onto your hip to make sure you'd never move from below him, even though you had no intention to do so.
You kept your lips on his, opening your mouth for an invitation for his tongue, which he took, as you unclasped your bra in a swift motion. As if you've been prepared for this moment for ages. He allowed himself to leave your mouth for a few moments to remove his own shirt, letting you run your hands down his bare chest.
His hand traveled between your nearly connected bodies as he found your covered cunt, dragging his fingers up and down at an agonizingly leisured pace to feel your wetness grow more and more apparent under your jeans.
He didn't waste his time letting his mouth wander your body, pressing wet kisses onto your jawline, and to your neck. He softly sucked on the skin that rested under your nearly unhinged jaw, making you arch your back into him and release soft moans of pleasure. The taste of your sweet skin only made his shorts grow tighter and long for friction that only you could seem to solve.
He made his way to your breasts, suckling on your hardened nipple, which caused you to gasp from the release of tension that built ever since he laid his lips onto yours. His achingly slow pace only made you grow more heated.
His other hand worked at your other breast, making sure not to neglect it as he continued to swirl his tongue pleasurably around your nipple. He pressed soft kisses in the cave of your breasts, then down your torso as he made his way down to the waistband of your jeans.
His eyes met yours, as if he needed an "okay" to continue. You gave him a small smile, lifting your hips to aid him in removing your clothing all at once.
He made himself comfortable between your legs, admiring the perfect sight in front of him. You had spread your legs open for him already as your hips urged for him to touch you, to make any sort of movement towards your heat.
He pressed deep, open-mouthed kisses against the skin of your inner thighs, sucking softly and leaving your body completely in tune with his touch. Josh would drag his lips close enough to your wet cunt to tease you, leading you to believe he would move his mouth just a little more to finally dig into your wet pussy, only for him to drag his lips back up your thighs in retaliation to hear you grow more upset and needy for his mouth on your cunt.
He held your gaze as he dragged his finger up your slick slit, watching your mouth agape and release a soft moan.
"Please, please, Josh." You begged. Your quiet, whiny pleas had him wrapped around your finger, as his lips rested in a coy smile from your words that he longed to hear forever.
He hooked his hands onto your thighs and pressed a soft kiss onto your clit, then flattening his tongue to lap up your sweet nectar that tasted as close as it could to honey. He seemed ravenous, despite wanting to take his time with you. The moment the taste of you hit his tongue, he couldn't stop himself.
One hand found its way into his hair, another playing with your nipple as he continued to suck at your clit, flicking his eyes up at you as he teased your entrance with the tip of his index finger. He slowly inserted his middle finger into you, watching as your back arched whilst he curled it. His mouth worked wonders on you as he began to work his finger deliciously inside of your gummy walls.
“Shit, Josh.” You moaned out dragged syllables. Saying his name was a constant reminder that it was him who was laying between your legs and creating the tight knot in your stomach.
You tried to keep your moans to a low, but it was hard when this was the most pleasure you've ever felt. A sense of euphoric satisfaction as he entered another finger into your hole, building up your high quicker than you expected.
You tugged at your bottom lip as you watched him devour you. He was lost in the taste of you, sending his mind into an alternate state where only you mattered, and time ceased to exist. He hummed in approval and the vibrations had you bucking your hips into his mouth impulsively.
His movements slowed, making you whine from the loss of friction as he arose from the bed and slipped out of his shorts and his boxers. Your eyes watched as his cock sprung out, leaking with precum and throbbing with need.
He turned away from you for a moment and searched his drawers for a condom, finally saying "aha!" to himself and pulling one out.
You lightly giggled as he slipped it on, tugging at your bottom lip.
"What's so funny?" He smirked at you, one corner of his mouth raised to only partially reveal his teeth.
"Just funny how you had some in your drawer, that's all."
"Always gotta be prepared." He said, crawling on top of you and cradling your face into another kiss.
Your hand reached for his cock, pumping him to the best of your ability through the rubber. He shuttered, softly groaning into your ear as he placed more kisses onto your cheek.
His hand landed onto yours, lining himself up with you and taking another glance at you to make sure you were okay.
As your breathing was intensified, you gave him a small smile with a nod, and he slowly inserted himself into you. His head rolled back, and his eyes shut, he grasped onto your legs to wrap them around his waist, placing his hands on the sides of your head as he started a slow pace in and out of you with deep groans.
He stretched you out perfectly. Your nails digging into his back, you moaned his name loudly as he fully bottomed out into you, dragging himself in and out of you slowly.
"You're going to have to be quiet, mama. Can't have anybody hearing us." He breathed, placing a kiss on the side of your cheek.
All you could do was nod, bringing a hand to his head to grasp onto his curls. And that made him roll his eyes into the back of his head and grow a faster pace.
He thrusted into you at a steady, quick speed, making sounds of skin slapping against each other more apparent in the air. But you didn't care. Hell, you felt like you could barely hear because you were so focused on Josh hitting your sweet spot every time he entered back into you.
"Fuck, y/n." He hummed into your ear. “You don’t know how long I’ve wanted this.”
“Yeah?” You whined back.
“God, yeah. Always have, mama. You feel so fucking perfect.” He groaned lowly, his voice shaky with sensational pleasure.
This new reality was something you always thought was out of reach. Something that only happens when you rest your head on your pillow and dream of. But hearing him say your name, telling you how amazing you are, how lovely you feel, made your senses heighten and permanently imprint into your brain that he was holding you close to his sweaty body, pumping in and out of you at a perfect pace and calling your name as a reminder that only you mattered in this moment. Only you were to ever make him feel this way.
The bed squeaked slightly as he rocked in and out of you, matching your hums and moans of approval with his own. All you could say were slurs of swears and his own name, that seemed so foreign to him and had his mind delirious over the thought of being in this exact position every chance he got.
His hand snaked between your bodies and found your clit, rubbing vigorously at the bud to send you to your release.
You bit the back of your hand as your body was at an all-time high, barely sitting at the tipping point.
"I'm so close, Josh, please." You squeaked behind your hand.
"Go ahead, cum for me, mama. Cum for me." He pleaded, his thrusts growing lazy as he was near his own orgasm.
Through hooded eyes, you watched as his face relaxed and tightened, thrusting into you deeply and harshly. All you could spit out was his name, pleas of “don’t stop” and “just like that”.
Your eyes squeezed shut, white flashing behind your eyes, your back arched as your orgasm rode throughout your veins and entire being. Your legs started to shake around him, your pussy squeezing him tighter than before around his hard cock. His hand abandoned your clit and rested onto the side of your torso as his knuckles turned white while he gripped onto the bedsheets to keep himself steady.
"Shit, Josh." You whimpered as his pace became unsteady, and he chased his own release.
"So close, fuck. Gonna cum." He croaked, digging his head into your shoulder as you scratched at his back and scalp.
The pleasurable pain ran throughout your body. It seemed that the only sense you had left in you was your hearing. You noticed his deep, throaty groans turned into bubbly whimpers as he chased his high, begging himself to finish and to finally feel the satisfactory ending he’s craved for so long.
He lazily brought a hand to your face, cupping it and forcing you to look at him as he lifted his face from your shoulder.
“Look at me, my good girl. Look at me, mama.” He swallowed, his lips fallen open as he breathed heavily.
And you did, snapping yourself out of your previously limp state to watch as he grew so close to releasing his hot ropes of cum. You found it in you to grip onto his hair, tugging and pulling in ways that you knew he adored. And God, he looked perfect under the moonlight, fully bare and vulnerable.
His hips faltered, he pumped into you with shaky legs, burying his head into your shoulder as he called your name with his own release. He thrusted into you once more to desperately try and drain himself fully, his breathing shaky.
And for a moment, he stayed inside of you, trying to catch his breath before making another move other than to kiss you and tell you how good it was in between breaths. He didn’t want to leave your body just yet. He wanted to savor this moment between you two, where you and him were finally connected as one.
He pushed himself up and pulled out of you, standing up as he rid the condom and coming back to you to hold your body close to his.
"Perfect, just perfect." He mumbled, placing a soft kiss on your head as you relaxed your body on top of his.
Your heaving chests collided, you rested your head on the beads of sweat that laid upon his toned chest.
"Josh?"
"Yeah?"
"Did you mean it? When you said you've always wanted this?" You lifted your head to look at him and saw his tired expression.
"Yeah, of course I did. Ever since I met you, actually. Always had something for ya. Thought it was pretty obvious." He shrugged with a smug grin.
"Not at all!" You giggled, placing your hand on top of his slick chest.
He smiled at you and helped you under the covers as you melted into each other's bare bodies once more, connecting with each other as a reminder that this was all a reality, and he was finally yours after years of seemingly hopeless dreams.
557 notes · View notes
joshym · 8 months
Text
No Hands: Part 2
Tumblr media
Pairings: Josh Kiszka x f!Reader
Summary: You had your turn, now it's his.
Word Count: 3k+
Read part one.
Warnings: 18+ ONLY mentions of poor body image, light bondage, use of mouth gag, fingering, oral (f!rec), unprotected p in v sex, a little degradation, some slight edging, overstimulation, slight choking, squirting, lots of dirty talk, some fluff, Joshs white satin scarf (please let me know if I missed anything, lol)
a/n: the first part of this little story had me in chokehold (pun intended) & I knew I had to continue it.
so, with that said,
ENJOY.
“Put this on. You have five minutes. I’ll be right back.”
He dug down deep in your closet to find it. The thing that makes him lose all sensibility, that brings out the feral animal in him that fucks you until you’re near tears.
The dress. 
The one that gets you in trouble. The good kind.
He’s home on a quick break from tour, and every night has been full of passion and desire for one another. 
He leaves again tomorrow morning, so you know he’s got something quite special planned for you on this last night together at home.
You quickly put it on as soon as he leaves the room, looking at yourself in the mirror. Your body has always made you a little insecure, but the way this dress fits you…it’s no wonder Josh can’t keep composure. The most beautiful parts of your body are accentuated, and you especially love the fact that the hem barely hits your upper thighs. 
Josh has never been shy of expressing his undying love for you, for your body. He practically worships you, kissing the ground on which you walk after each step you take. He makes you feel like a divine being among mortals. The attention he gives to your body, and the extra attention he gives to the things you don’t love about it…how you could ever doubt your beauty is beyond his way of thinking.
You sit on the edge of the bed as you await your lover, thinking about the way he looked today against the sun. 
He’d spent all day outside putting together your new backyard furniture and as you brought him drinks, you couldn’t help but admire him. How his honey skin was glowing in the rays, how the peach fuzz on his chest sparkled as sweat droplets glistened and caught the light, and how each goosebump beautifully decorated his skin when he poured water on his head to cool off. 
God, he’s beautiful. Fucking immaculate. And he’s yours. 
You hear his feet padding up the stairs. Your heart begins racing as you know you’re in for it due to his special choice of wardrobe for you.
As he makes his way through the door frame, you stand up to put yourself on display for him in his favorite dress of yours.
He stands there for a moment, drinking you in. 
His hands hold a beautiful white, silken scarf. 
Your heart skips a beat as you’re flooded with a memory. 
“Maybe next time, you’re the one that can’t use your hands. Maybe we tie them behind your back. How does that sound, hm?”
“Fuck, sweetheart. A sight for sore eyes, you are. Spin around for me, baby. Let me get a good look at you.”
You slowly turn your body, lifting your dress slightly so your ass cheeks just barely peek out the bottom.
“That’s my good girl. Always love to give me a little show, yeah? Perfect. Fucking perfect.” he says as he walks up to you.
He cups your face with one hand while the other drags the scarf along your thighs. 
“Look what I have for you. A pretty scarf for my pretty girl who is such a slut for me and my hands.”
He takes your bottom lip between his teeth, biting almost hard enough to draw blood as he swallows your every moan.
“Remember your little game?” 
“Yes, Joshy..” you say, your voice soft with lust and need.
“Remember what I promised you?”
“Yes, baby.”
“And what was my promise?”
He grabs your jaw, turning your face up to meet his.
“That you’re going to tie my hands behind my back, so I can’t use them.”
“That’s right, my darling.” 
His hand moves from your jaw to the pulse point of your neck, squeezing it deliciously before he lifts you up and puts you on the bed.
He stands there looking at you all laid out for him, marveling at you while he bites his bottom lip. His eyes are heavy, so full of desire for you that your heart swells as you feel like the most beautiful creature in his presence. 
You spread your legs just a little, but enough to reveal that you opted out of anything underneath the dress. 
“No panties, huh?” he says through the grin adorning his luscious lips. “My dirty, sluty girl.”
“I’m not sluty.” 
“Yes, yes you are, darling. A slut for me.”
You can’t even deny him, and your cheeks flush at his words.
You are a slut for him. His slut. You’d do anything he’d ask you, and he knows it.
He puts the silk scarf around his neck before slowly crawling up your body. He attaches his plush lips your chest, licking up to your collar bone that he grazes with his teeth. 
“You’ll let me know if it’s too much, okay?” he says softly against your ear.
You’re too caught up in the way he feels to be able to respond, so you simply nod your head to let him know you understand.
He removes the scarf from around his neck, dragging it across your lips, down your chest, descending further to embrace every curve of your body. The soft satin like honey gliding across your warm skin as it melts into you with its gentle touch.
He dips it slowly between your legs, pulling on it ever so slightly as it skates across your drenched core.
Your body weakens with each pull of the scarf, becoming encompassed with red hot desire as the fabric lightly tugs on your throbbing clit.
He sits up on his knees between your legs.
"Hands."
You obey, putting your arms in front of you, fingers intertwined together.
He kisses each wrist as he begins tying the scarf around them. Dark eyes full of lust and need locked with yours.
One knot, two knots...
He pulls on it, ensuring it’s tight enough.
“Feel okay, darling?” 
“It’s perfect.” 
Your voice is noticeably shaky. This is new territory for you, but the thought of being inhibited this way, giving him all the control while you haven’t the use of your hands…it’s elating.
He places sweet kisses down your arms, moving to your hips as he plays with the floral fabric hugging you.
“Fuck…I will never get enough of this little ensemble on you…” 
He begins bunching the fabric up your hips, knuckles white from the grip he has.
“...and I’ll never get tired of fucking you in it.”
His head dips down as you feel his breath against your wetness, causing you to buck your hips into his face to chase any sort of contact. 
He places his hand on your hip to hold you still.
“Patience, my dear. I’ll give you what you want.”
You reach your tied hands down to grip his hair, when he suddenly lifts away from you.
“Well, this simply won’t do.”
He unties your wrists.
“These need to be behind you. Don’t want them getting in the way, now do we?”
You lift up, moving your arms behind and allowing him to secure them before you lay back down.
With your hands now behind you, being held down by your own weight on your back, you truly are helpless against his will.
He returns to his position between your legs, kissing your thighs as you squirm under him. 
Out of instinct, you attempt to move your arms, realizing you can’t.
He feels you tense up. “Hm, seem to have found yourself in a little predicament, darling?”
Something about losing the ability to use your hands, how it nearly leaves you fully to his whim. He can do whatever he wants to you, and you’re going to fucking let him.
He looks up at you with hungry eyes. He wants it as bad as you do, but he’s loving taunting you, feeling your body trembling beneath him, making you desperate for him.
He giggles at your state, lips just out of reach from where you crave them the most.
“You want it? Want me to taste you?”
“Please, Josh…I want it so bad.”
“Hm, I’m not convinced. Need you to be a little more detailed.” he says as he licks along your inner thigh.
He wants you to beg. And you’ll do whatever it takes. Your need for him grows by the second.
“Please taste me, baby. I’m so fucking ready for you…please, I need you so bad. Need to feel your tongue on me. Need you to suck me, eat me, anything baby please, I can’t handle it.”
“Ah, there she is. That sweet voice begging for me to do such filthy things.”
He nudges your clit with his nose before fucking into you with his tongue, lapping inside of you, keeping his nose pressed against your clit as it follows the movements of his tongue.
His strong hands have a tight hold on your hips to keep you still. He feels you continue to tense under him, knowing how badly you want to move. He groans into you and the vibrations of his voice add another layer of intensity and hurl you closer and closer to your sweet release.
“Josh, Josh oh my god…fuck it feels so fucking good I’m-I’m so close Josh FUCK…”
He smiles against your swollen pussy as his tongue is buried inside of you.
Your stomach is tightening, your skin on fire and drenched with sweat. You’re suddenly very much aware of the fact that you can’t use your hands and it’s near torture to not be able to pull his hair and force his face even harder into you. 
His lips close around your clit, sucking it into his mouth, forcing the knot in your belly to break instantly. You scream incoherencies, your body almost entirely numb. 
“There you go, darling, there you go.”
He works you through it perfectly, bringing you back to earth with gentle kisses to your throbbing clit.
He lifts his head up. His lips swollen and pink, glistening wet from you.
“Goddamn, y/n…” he moves to kiss you, sticking his tongue deep in your mouth to give you a taste of yourself. “...you are fucking delectable, aren’t you? I could stay between those pretty legs all fucking day, make you cum just like that over and over again.”
You whimper in his mouth as he swallows every sound you make.
“Josh, please…I want to touch you…”
“Awh, my sweet girl can’t play her own game, can she?”
You want to run your hands all over him. His skin that’s sticky with perspiration, his muscles that tense under your fingers, you need to feel him. 
The corner of his mouth curls up in his tantalizing smile that sends a pool of wetness flooding to your core. “I got this pretty scarf just for you, darling. It’d be such a shame to not use it somewhere.”
You bite your lip hard in anticipation of whatever his sinister mind is brewing. 
“Should we shove it in your gorgeous mouth?”
Fuck. The thought alone has you tightly clamping your thighs together in need of any sort of friction.
“Oh. You liked that, didn’t you?” 
He gently lifts you up, brushing your messy hair down with his fingers before carefully untying your binds.
“Joshy…” 
“Yes, darling?”
Your freed hands instantly latch onto his body. Feeling all over his toned frame, pulling him closer to lick up his stomach to his gorgeous pecs, kissing his hardened nipple. He throws his head back as a beautiful moan sounds from his throat. 
“I want you to gag me with it, Josh.” You flick his nipple with your tongue before sitting up on your knees, looking him in his lust laden eyes. “I want you to fuck me with it shoved down my throat.” 
He grips your hips hard, pulling your body against his. “You dirty, sluty little girl. Your wish is my command, my queen.”
He kisses you deeply, then brings the scarf up to your mouth. “Open, my darling.”
You open your mouth, tongue laid out flat as he slowly shoves the silk all the way inside. You feel the material slide closer and closer to the back of your throat, triggering your gag reflex as he fits the rest of it inside. 
“That feel okay, my love?” 
Having lost yet another ability, this time the one to speak, you simply nod.
“You’re so filthy, my pretty girl.” He shoves his hand between your legs, fingers dipping inside of you and bringing them to your swollen clit. “Your sweet cunt all soaked from having a gag in your mouth, yeah? God, I fucking love you.” 
He turns you around, keeping you up on your knees as you face away from him. His hands reach around, pulling your dress up to your lower belly, fingers gripping your hips as he pulls your ass against him.
“Ready for my cock, darling?” 
You nod and whine around the balled up scarf. He pulls his shorts down, his hard dick nudging your lower back. You can feel the precum against you and you’re wishing you could wrap your lips around his head to gather it up.
He wraps his hand around your throat as his dick teases your desperate pussy. You want, no, you need him inside. You need to feel the burning stretch of him so badly. You grind your dripping cunt against him, trying anything to force him inside. 
You hear him ‘tsk’ in your ear. “I love your needy little cunt.” 
He toys with you a bit longer before finally shoving himself all the way inside in one hard thrust. 
You’re nearly screaming against the satin filling your mouth. The sting of his cock is a welcome pain as you finally feel full of him.
He starts slow, pumping himself at an excruciating pace to hear the lewd, wet sounds of his cock sliding in and out of you. “Listen to that, baby. Your sweet, wet cunt singing for my cock. The most beautiful sound.”
He sends a rather harsh thrust into you that nearly causes you to double over. 
He fucks into you harder, his hand still firm on your throat as his fingers of the other dig in to your hip. 
You want to scream his name. You want to tell him how fucking good he feels. But all you can do is whimper, scream and sob. And that you do.
He changes his pace as he swivels his hips, his cock pressed up against your sweet spot.
“You’re close, darling. This sweet pussy is getting so tight around me. You’re gonna make a mess, aren’t you?”
He knows you can’t talk, and he knows how bad you want to. Muffled moans are all you can muster as you're once again on the verge of release. 
“Come on, darling. Need to feel you cum pretty for me. All over my cock, sweet baby.”
He moves his hand from your throat, tracing down your body until the pads of his fingers find your clit. He flicks the hardened nub with his index finger, sending you crashing head first into your peak. 
Your body spasms. Your every extremity tingling. His name is the only word coming to the forefront of your mind, and you want to scream it from the top of your lungs.
He continues to relentlessly fuck you, chasing his own release. 
He reaches up to pull the scarf from your mouth. “Talk to me baby, let me hear that beautiful voice.”
“FUCK Josh! Josh oh my FUCK!” is all you can manage as you’re nearing overstimulation, but unable to care as your body is close to driving over the edge yet again.
“You’re gonna cum again, aren’t you? Sweet cunts been so spoiled today, hasn’t she?”
His voice is strained and breathy, telling you he’s nearing his end as his thrusts become sloppy. 
“Give it to me, baby. Fuck I need it so bad, y/n.”
The dam within you breaks, dousing his cock, your thighs, the bed sheets beneath you. 
He grabs hold of the strap of your dress, ripping it as he pounds himself into you.
“Holy fuck, y/n!” 
He thrusts into you a few more times before shooting his warm cum inside you, coating you deliciously.
You’re both breathless, exhausted in your fucked out states.
He pulls out of you slowly. You feel your wet release mixed with his instantly dripping down your thighs.
He gently lays you down on your back as he kisses you back to life.
“Oh my god, y/n.” he says with his lips against your chest. “You are so fucking magnificent. I can’t…I can’t believe how fucking glorious you are, my sweet baby.” 
You’re too worn to speak, so you simply smile and run your fingers through his sweaty hair. 
He lifts up to take hold of the scarf, bringing it down to clean the mess you both have made off of you. You wince a little at the contact, and he continues with a careful hand. 
He sets it next to you on the bed before laying down and pulling you on top of him as he continuously kisses your head, holding the torn strap of your dress in his hand.
You snicker in his chest, to which he hums in question.
“I think you may have actually broken me this time. Well, the dress, at least.”
He laughs while investigating the frayed fabric between his fingers.
“I don’t need this ratty, old thing. You’re fucking perfect. My beautiful, wonderful girl.”
The warmth of his arms pulls you into a deep sleep and he soon follows in suit.
You awake the next morning to him shuffling around the house. The band has their next performance tomorrow night and he has a flight to catch this morning. To no surprise, he’s running late.
“Can I help you with anything, Josh?” you say with sleep still laced on your voice. 
He finishes getting dressed, quickly making his way over to you to kiss you goodbye. You’re excited because you’ll be able to come to this show, but you’ll have to take a later flight as you have to get a few things sorted out at work first.
“No, I think I’ve got everything.” 
He packs the last few items in his suitcase, and just before he shuts it, he grabs the bunched up scarf sitting next to you on the bed and shoves it inside his luggage. 
“And just what do you think you’re doing with that?”
“This is coming with me. Who knows, I may even wear it on stage. Use it for good luck.” he says with a wink.
taglist:
@jakeyt
@objectsinspvce
@stayinginthesun
@surfgreensam
@gvf-ficreads
@sinarainbows
@stardustcordzz
Masterlist
232 notes · View notes
lipstickitty · 2 months
Text
Crybaby
18+ MINORS DNI!!
Tumblr media
Josh Kiszka x f!reader
1.6k+ words
Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI!! Explicit, smut after cut, language, teasing, kissing, needy whiny subby Josh, restraints, pet names, dom reader, dirty talk, handjobs, spanking if you squint, drinking alcohol, spit kink if you squint, edging, anal play m receiving, toys, oral m receiving, begging, grinding, orgasm denial, tears, penetrative sex
Josh had been a dreadful brat all day, and worse than that, he had been a tease. Pulling you close and pressing himself against you every chance he got, letting his kisses linger just a little too long, letting his fingers ghost along your skin. He was always touchy but this was next level. You knew what that meant- he was feeling needy and he wanted you to take the lead.
Josh was a true switch, he loved to take charge and make you beg for him, but he also loved for you to tie him up and have your way with him. He knew that if he wanted it that way, all he had to do was ask, so all this teasing was only serving to piss you off and ensure that he’d be getting punished later.
“Knock it the fuck off, or I won’t even touch you tonight. What’s gotten into you, sweet boy?” You whisper after you’ve pulled him aside where no one can overhear.
“I’m so fucking hard for you, baby, feel.” He groans quietly, pulling your hand to cup his bulge over his pants.
“I don’t give a fuck how hard you are, Joshua. Not. My. Problem. Pull yourself together until everyone leaves or you get absolutely nothing.” You let your annoyance seep into your tone so he knows you mean it.
You see his jaw clench and his brows crease with irritation but he wisely keeps his mouth shut and walks away.
Finally, all the guests leave your shared home and you can be alone with Josh. “Strip.” You command. He obeys instantly, yanking his shirt over his head and ripping his pants and boxers down in one harsh tug.
You trail your hand down his chest and stomach before taking his throbbing cock in your hand and lightly squeezing. “Wow, Joshy, you’re so hard. Is that for me?” You coo, giving him a couple agonizingly slow strokes over his length.
“All for you, honey, please touch me, or let me touch you, anything, fuck, please.” He groans, bucking his hips into your touch.
“On the bed, on your back. Wait for me and if you touch yourself, this is over.” You order, smacking him on the ass as he walks past making him yelp.
You take your sweet time, stripping down to your bra and panties and pouring yourself a shot of tequila, downing it before pouring another and downing that one as well. You pour one more and bring it with you to your shared bedroom, keeping your footsteps silent so Josh wouldn’t hear you coming. You were hoping to catch him in the act but it seemed he’d actually listened, fists clenched by his sides and cock heavy and twitching and leaking all over his abdomen.
“Oh, so you can listen.” You speak up from the doorway, making Josh jump and his eyes open wide.
“Honey, I’m sorry, I just wanted-“
You cut him off, “I don’t give a fuck what you wanted. You know how to use your words and ask for what you want, right? So why the little game, why piss me off on purpose?”
“Maybe I like it when you tie me up and boss me around. When you’re rough with me and make me beg for what I want.” He pouts.
“Baby, just tell me that and I’d be happy to do that for you, okay? I want you to have what you want. But tonight you were an awful brat and now I’m gonna treat you like one.” You pour the last shot of tequila in your mouth and hold it there while you make your way over to Josh on the bed. You grab him by his cheeks and pull his mouth to yours, letting the liquor pour from your mouth into his. “Swallow.” He does so with a shudder.
“Don’t move.” You breathe, walking to your closet and retrieving one of Josh’s favorite scarves. “Hands.” You command when you make your way back over to his side. He presents both of his hands to you and you tie his hands together, making sure the knots hold when you tug on them.
“You look so beautiful all tied up for me, Joshy. Your pretty cock is making such a mess already and I’ve barely touched you, baby.” You coo, spitting on his length before wrapping your hand around it making him groan at the contact. You gather some of the precum off his tip with your thumb and use it to make your hand glide over him easier.
He was so hot and heavy in your hand and you could feel him twitching in your grasp as you finally started to stroke him just the way he liked, rounding your fist over his tip on way up. You worked him until you could feel him throbbing wildly in your hand and he warned you he was close, then you pulled your hand away.
You grabbed the vibrating butt plug reserved for moments like these and get it slicked up with lube before turning the vibration on and gliding the toy over his length, pausing it over his balls for a moment to hear him gasp. Then you circled the tip of it around his entrance, the vibrations making his hips buck involuntarily. Once you felt him relax you slowly slid the plug in to the hilt.
You let him whine and groan and writhe until he calmed down, then you lowered yourself between his legs and took his leaking tip in your mouth. He let out a loud moan as you swirled your tongue around his length, bringing a hand up to cup his balls and gently massage them as you started bobbing your head. Just like before, you worked him right up to the edge before taking your touch away entirely yet again.
“Fuck, honey, please. My cock hurts, I need to cum, please baby.” He pleads, hips jerking upwards involuntarily.
“I’ll decide when you need to cum.” You straddle his thighs this time and lower yourself down until your dripping center is pressed against his length. You start to grind your hips into his, his bare cock giving your still-clothed cunt the most delicious friction. “Don’t you dare fucking cum.” You threaten as you speed up your hips on his cock, making him let out a loud groan.
You continued rolling your hips into his until your orgasm washed over you, making you cry out as you worked yourself through it. Josh was thrashing his head side to side furiously, teeth gritted and eyes squeezed shut as he used every ounce of control to keep himself from cumming without your permission.
You were still on your little power trip until you saw tears rolling down his cheeks and you pulled away from him. “What do you need, baby? Do you want to stop? Talk to me.” You whisper, stroking your thumb over his cheekbone.
“I need to c-cum, please. Please let me, baby, I’ve been so good. I can’t hold it anymore, it hurts. Just wanna give it all to you.” He sobs.
“Where do you wanna cum, baby? You’ve been so good for me, my sweet boy. Whatever you want.”
“Want you to ride me. Please, I wanna make you cum again, I need to feel it. Wanna fill you up with my cum until it’s dripping down your thighs, please, I have so much for you, wanna give it all to you.” He’s babbling, face red and cock flushed and pulsing wildly.
You waste no time pulling your panties to the side and sinking yourself down on his length, making him let out a relieved cry at finally feeling you wrapped around him. You reach up and untie his wrists before pressing a soft kiss to each one.
“You can touch me however you like, sweet boy.” You whisper as you start bouncing on his cock, groans and high pitched cries leaving his mouth. His hands fly to your hips and he’s helping push and pull you along his cock. He’s babbling and begging almost incoherently and you know he’s not going to last long, you can feel him twitching inside you already, but you’re so worked up from teasing him that you can feel yourself approaching your peak already right alongside him.
“Fuck, kiss me, please.” Josh moans out, hands reaching up to tangle in your hair as you meet his mouth in a kiss that’s rough and almost painful.
“Baby, baby, fuck- you’re squeezing me so fuckin tight. Need you to cum for me now, please baby, I fuckin need it, right on my cock.” He grunts through gritted teeth, hips meeting yours to fuck up into you as you grind down on him.
You feel him pulse wildly inside of you and he whimpers and that’s enough to send you crashing into your orgasm, clenching and squeezing around his cock as you soak him, feeling him twitch and pump his release deep inside you.
“Fuck baby, gonna fill you up so good, that’s it. Keep squeezing me, feels so fucking good, oh god I’m still cumming-“ Josh cuts himself off with a loud grunt as his orgasm dwindles and your pussy clenching around him milks the last of his release from his spent cock. You slide the plug out of Josh and turn the toy off just before you collapse on top of him, both of you sweaty and panting, and just let him grow soft inside of you, both of you needing the intimacy. And you stay like that until you feel like you can get your legs underneath you, easing up off of him and starting a bath to take care of your sweet boy.
———————————
Thank you so much to my bestie @gracev0609 for always helping me with ideas and reviewing my work!! I love you!!! 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻
123 notes · View notes
streamingcolors-gvf · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media
Pairing: Josh Kiszka x f!reader
Word Count: 1.3K
A/N: This is just a little blurb that plagued my mind this afternoon. It’s nothing crazy, not super detailed or edited, but I had to get it out there.
Enjoy!
Warnings: cursing, sexually explicit content - 18+ Minors DNI! (oral sex m!receiving)
You knock lightly on the dressing room door with your knuckles and wait for his voice from the otherside before cracking it open. He’s dressed in a silken robe with his initials stitched to the breast pocket. He’s seated in front of the large vanity, fixing and teasing at his curls.
“Hey,” you chime, peering into the quiet room. 
He turns in his chair, greeting you with a sweet smile.“Hello, beautiful.”
You close the door behind you and walk over to him. You can’t hide your excitement even though you had seen each other hours before. “Speak for yourself.”
He had already had his makeup done. Silvery, eyeshadow glimmered across his lids with iridescent rhinestones carefully placed along his high cheekbones. 
You stand before him, allowing him to hold you close by the hips. He can’t hide the bashful smile.“What are you doing back here? You’re supposed to be in your seat, young lady.”
“How do you expect me to listen to the opener when I know you’re back here.”
“Just couldn’t resist me, huh?”
You break away from his grasp, walking toward the rolling rack of outfits that had been wheeled in here. You flip through them, all ones you recognize, feeling the different fabrics of each one until you come across one in particular. The sheer white one that’s adorned with patterns of rhinestones. While gorgeous on its own, it’s completely see through, meant only as a layer over his other jumpsuits. “This one is my favorite.”
He chuckles, stepping closer to you.“That’s just a cover-up, love.”
“Exactly.” You lift the hanger off the pole, freeing it from the rack. Once in your hands, the weight of it surprises you despite the material it's made from.  “You should try it on for me.”
He hesitates for a second before taking it from you. He’s clearly surprised by your request, causing his brows to pull together as he scoffs, “Right now? You’ve already seen this one on me.”
“Yeah, but I need a refresher,” you insist, wiggling your brows at him.  
He drapes the cover-up over his arm and starts flipping through the other jumpsuits until you stop him. “No. Only this.”
You stand back, watching as he shrugs off his embroidered silk robe. You’ve seen him naked countless times, but you’ll never grow tired of it. Fully in the nude, he carefully pulls down the tiny zipper and starts slipping on your outfit of choice one foot at a time. 
He stands before the full length mirror to adjust, pinching and pulling until it settles just right on his lean form. 
Just like you predicted, the jumpsuit seems to melt seamlessly with his skin, making it look as though his entire body glitters and sparkles with precious jewels. Tailored with expert precision, it clings and drapes perfectly, leaving nothing to the imagination.  
You come into view of the mirror and bring yourself close to him. Holding him by the waist as you hook your chin over his shoulder. You breathe in his rich scent, crisp and clean with the undertones of a subtle cologne. The deep v-shaped neckline of the suit allows him to layer his necklaces, drawing your eyes down the center of his chest. You can see everything — his hardening nipples, the contours of his stomach and hips, and ultimately his soft cock on full display. 
He barks out a throaty laugh, amused by the sight of himself. “Can you imagine if I walked out like this?”
You giggle, knowing full well that there are many women that would give anything to see him like this. 
He might as well be completely naked.
“Would be quite hedonistic of me.” He can’t hold back a giggle of his own as he tries different poses as. “So risqué. So scandalous.” 
“So perfect,” you coo against his decorated ear as you run your hands down the length of his arms. You hold him by his waist, guiding yourself flush against his back. Your soft whine is nestled into his flesh. “What do they call you again? Ethereal?”
Within seconds, his playful smile drops and his mouth falls open. He’s fixating on your moving hands, watching as they roam over his body with the faintest of touches. Seeing his cock twitch and harden with such little restraint is proving to be the best reward you could’ve asked for.
You kiss along his jawline, nipping at the thin skin but making sure not to leave a mark. “Don’t be shy, baby. You love when they call you beautiful.” 
He hums in response, perhaps to hide the blush creeping across his jeweled cheeks. You meet his lustful gaze in the mirror and sigh, “Look at you.” 
You run your fingertips down the hidden track of his front zipper until you’re met with the base of his cock. He groans from the touch, “Oh, fuck.” 
The sensation of your fingers brushing over the thin fabric is new — providing enough of a barrier to make him ache for more. You trace along his growing length, circling around the head that’s now pressed against his thigh. “Does it feel good?”
“Mmhmm. I need more,” he begs as his hips buck forward to chase the feeling. 
You step in front of him and slowly drop to your knees. Looking up at him, you’re met with that desperate expression. He’s trying his best to hold his restraint. You skim your lips up and down his barely-covered cock, forcing the heat of your breath through the jumpsuit. 
“You’re fucking killing me,” he breathes. You can hear the smile through the words and picture that expression on his face that he proudly wears on stage.
You drag your tongue over him, wetting the delicate material in your path. He’s throbbing wildly, aching for release. With a teasing blow of air, you cause a violent shudder to roll through his body and a string of curses to leave his mouth. His hand grips yours that’s wrapped around his waist while the other rests on the crown of your head. 
“You’re so pretty, Josh,” you praise, kissing everywhere your lips can reach. “You have the prettiest cock I’ve ever seen.” 
“Please, baby. I need to feel your mouth.” He takes the initiative, tugging at the small zipper. You sit back on your heels, watching his rush to free himself.
“Feeling needy?” You taunt as you replace his hand by wrapping your fingers around the base of him. Knowing you’re about to take him into your mouth while he wears one of his stage outfits makes your own desire build between your thighs. 
“Please, please. I need it.” A broken whimper breaks free from his throat. You know him enough to tell that he’s close, fighting the urge to cum within seconds. It could be the risk of getting caught, or knowing he would have to wait hours to have you again, but he can’t sit still, half thrusting and shaking at your tongue spoils him. 
The memory of him gliding across your flattened tongue will live in your mind while he struts around on that stage in less than an hour. His scent, the feel of his velvet-soft skin, the way he grips you as he gets close to cumming will be the only things you can think about. You want him to think about you too. You want him to struggle not getting hard remembering how your mouth felt on him. 
“Fuck! Fuck, I’m so close,” he pants, taping your hand on his hip and gripping your hair. He huffs out to warn you. “I’m gonna cum.”
You take the cue, burying him deep to the back of your throat. He falls apart within seconds. You swallow him down, making sure to lick him clean.
“I was not expecting that. Holy shit,” he laughs breathlessly. Shined with your spit, he tucks his softening cock back in the see-through jumpsuit. He offers his hands and helps you stand to your feet.
“Just wanted to give you something to think about,” you tease, dabbing the slight sheen of sweat that’s collected across his brow. 
His fucked-out smile is beaming with the orgasmic euphoria. He hums, placing an affectionate kiss on your lips. “You, my sweet. Are an evil, treacherous woman.”
258 notes · View notes
watchingovergvff · 10 months
Text
Don’t Blame Me- Jake Kiszka
Tumblr media
Summary: The push and pull of your’s and Jake’s relationship is exhausting. He used to be your knight in shining armor, but now only lives to be a thorn in your side. One night changes it all, can you get past it?
Genre: Enemies to Lovers. Secret Relationship. Angst, Fluff.
Word Count: 6.7k
Warnings: Alcohol. Cursing. Implied Sexual Relations. Jealousy. Asshole!Jake.
A/N: I love to hear feedback, so please don’t hesitate to do so. Thank you for all the love and support <3333 This fic was loosely based on Taylor Swift’s “Don’t Blame Me”.
_______________________________________________
“Do you get off at five today?”
“Yeah.”
“Wanna go out with me and the guys tonight?”
“Sure, you're picking me up though.”
Danny truly gets the best big brother award. Here he is, calling you once again, inviting you to go out with the rest of the guys. Normal big brothers would be too embarrassed to have their little sister trail behind them, not Danny.
Your parents never had to force Danny to tote you around. If you had gone missing, it was most likely because he had brought you with him somewhere. The two of you were only a year apart, but Danny did have the habit of being over protective of you.
Regardless of the fact you were siblings, you were also best friends. When Danny and Sam first became friends, Danny had insisted you were included in everything, no matter what. Sam had never found it odd, over time he became just as attached to you as Danny was. So, that's how your little trio started and has stayed throughout the years.
Driving home from work, you take note of the sunny weather surrounding you. Sam had called you on the way home from work, wanting to chat about his week. Letting him ramble away, you chime in every now and then. Pulling into your driveway, you spot Danny’s car parked near the curb. Hanging up the phone with Sam, you promise to resume your one sided conversation at the bar tonight. Sauntering through your front door, you find Danny sprawled out on your couch.
“Hey kiddo,” he utters.
“Hey, you're here early.”
Danny kicks off the couch, heading to your room already. You follow close behind him, needing to find something else to wear tonight.
“I’ve been here since 12. Studio time got cut short today, because Jake and Josh couldn’t get along whatsoever.” “But, aren’t we going out with them tonight?”
“Yep.”
Watching him shrug his shoulders at the brothers' ridiculous conflict. Scouring through your closet, you kick Danny out of your room so you can change.
You wanted to keep it cool tonight, since it would be super hot outside, so you opted for jean shorts and a simple top.
Finding Danny in your kitchen, chugging water, you start feeling nervous.
“So, Jake is coming for sure?”
“Yeah, he’ll show up at some point.”
He eyes you curiously. “Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why does it matter if Jake shows up or not?”
“I just want to be prepared for his sour attitude.”
He laughs, gesturing for you to gather your things and head out the door. Following him to the car, you can’t shake the nerves of seeing Jake.
___________
Growing up with Danny and Sam, you were bound to wander through the Kiszka household at some point. One of the first times you met the twins, you had been searching for Sam.
Danny had told you to meet him at the Kiszka's house once you made it off the school bus, one late afternoon. He had reassured you that it was fine to just walk inside, they would be in Sam’s room waiting.
As a child, you were way more reserved compared to your older brother. Walking into a house you’ve never been in, regardless of the fact the two boys were waiting inside for you, you were drenched in fear.
Knocking on the front door, refusing to just walk in, you grip your backpack a little tighter. The door swings open and a boy you’ve never seen before stands in the doorway. “Hi, who are you?”
The boy wore one of the biggest smiles you’ve ever seen before.
“Sorry, is Danny here?” you whisper meekly, head hung low.
His face lights up even further, “Oh! You must be Y/n. Here, come inside.”
You hesitate, wanting to turn around and run home. He patiently waits for you, not wanting to make you even more nervous. Finally, you follow in after him.
“My name is Josh, I’m Sam’s older brother.”
Nodding up at him, you remain silent.
“This is Jake, my twin brother.”
Your head whips towards the older boy, a blush spreading across your cheeks.
The older boy, Jake, leans against the kitchen counter, barely giving you the time of day. He does manage a quick tight-lipped smile, going back to what he was doing.
Before you can make more of a fool of yourself, you hear your name being called down the hall. You look up at Josh, finally making eye contact with him, you smile. “Thank you, Josh.” you softly reply, skipping down the hall towards Sam’s room.
Throughout the rest of the evening, you couldn’t stop thinking of Sam’s older brother, Jake.
Those thoughts continued all throughout middle school, into high school, and now into your adult life. But, Jake had never given you the time of day, even now, only swapping pleasantries with you. You felt like a fool, letting some childhood crush linger this long, but no matter what you do, you just can’t shake Jake.
___________________
Arriving at the bar downtown, you and Danny make a b-line for the nearest bartender, already ordering drinks. “Y/n! You came.”
Sam comes stumbling to your left, swinging an arm around your shoulder.
“Hey, what about me?” Danny asks, taking both of your drinks from the bartender.
“I saw you a few hours ago Daniel, don’t be selfish.” Sam narrows his eyes, already letting the laughter sound.
You rub Sam’s back gently, peeling his intoxicated body off yours.
“How long have you been here?”
“Uhh, I think thirty minutes, but I'm not sure.”
Ruffling his hair, you ask, “How are you already drunk?” “Josh and I pregamed before.”
“Y’all need help.”
Danny, Sam, and you find Josh by the pool table, sipping on another beer. Josh being alot like his younger brother Sam, he squeezes you into a bearhug.
“I told Daniel to leave you alone. You work too hard to have to deal with us right after work.”
Walking around the pool table, you sit yourself atop a nearby barstool. “Whatever, I needed to come out tonight. I’ve been so stressed with work this week, and my boss has been giving me shit all month about some stupid paperwork thing. So, I’m looking forward to drowning my sorrows with all of you tonight.”
They all give you a pitiful look, feeling sorry for you. Swatting away their unnecessary pity, you flash a mischievous grin.
“Actually, you know what would make me feel better, another drink,” you sweetly reply, batting your eyelashes at Sam.
“Fine, your drinks are on me tonight.” Sam huffs, but gladly adds your next drink to his tab.
The boys start up a pool game, letting you go last since you're too busy sipping on your drink. Danny and you go head to head throughout the game, always being competitive with each other.
You unsurprisingly lose, becoming a sore loser almost instantly. Sam consoles you, always having a sweet spot for you.
Danny and Josh start yet another round of pool, but remain conversing with you and Sam. Your sour attitude towards Danny’s win fades quickly, getting wrapped up in whatever they start talking about.
Your happiness dies quickly, when a certain Kiszka twin enters the bar, meeting your eyes.
“Jake, you decided to show up, how nice of you.” Sam calls out, making everyone turn in Jake’s direction. “Fuck off Sam–”
Drowning out Jake’s words, you can’t help but wonder who the girl to his right is. The stranger trails Jake like a hawk, giving you a quick once over. You roll your eyes at the girl, not really caring for niceties.
It’s unlike you to not even try to be fake nice to strangers, but her reaction towards you minding your own business, makes it fair game.
Jake walks right past you, not even bothering to acknowledge you, which isn’t much of a surprise.
Not wanting Jake’s poor mood to bring you down any further, you tug Sam with you to get another drink.
______________
Jake had been anxious to see you all night. Danny had insisted on bringing you with them to the bar tonight, despite the fact Jake had suggested it be a guys night. Fine, if they didn’t want to listen to him, he would bring his own plus one.
Jake had only recently met this girl, but had decided to invite her anyway. In truth, the only reason he was bringing her in the first place was because he wanted to make you jealous. You had continuously teased him, using Sam to do your dirty work in making him jealous, so it's only fair that he gets a rise out of you this time.
It hasn’t always been like this, you and him. Over the years, Jake watched you grow up, always feeling a need to protect you like an older brother. That's what he felt like to you anyway, your big brother. You were four years younger than him, so of course he only saw you as a little sister.
Everything changed two years ago, at some random dinner party Josh threw. Jake had just recently gotten out of a long term relationship, struggling to even socialize with his brothers. Josh and Sam had insisted he come, trying to get him out of this funk. What they hadn’t mentioned was that the ‘dinner party’ was more of a rager if anything.
Their house was littered with people, all far from sober. Jake regrets even leaving his room to come down here. He starts to make the trek back to his room, that is until he hears his name being called behind him. Trying not to groan in annoyance, he slowly spins around.
“Hey, Jakey.”
It's Y/n.
Wow... she looks different. Why is she here?
“Y/n, what are you doing here?”
“Don’t sound too excited to see me,” you say snidely.
“No it’s just– No one told me you were coming.”
“No one knows I'm here. I had a free weekend, I figured why the hell not come see my favorite boys.”
“Well, good to see you. If anyone asks where I am, don’t tell them.”
He starts to walk away, purposefully not looking at you. “Oh– okay. I’ll come find you later.”
“Please don’t.”
Jake didn’t need to turn around to know the damage he’s just done to you, but instead of fixing it, he keeps walking as far away as he can get from you.
That night, Jake goes to sleep thinking of you, and not about the broken relationship he just left. ________________
You and Sam remained at the bar, sipping lightly on your drinks, chatting about anything and everything.
Danny was your best friend, he really was. But, Sam was different, he also wasn’t your brother. You and Danny talk about a lot, but there are some things you can’t bring yourself to talk about with him.
Sam was truly your best friend. He knew about your ongoing crush on Jake, even if you wouldn’t admit it out loud. Which is why he had no problem spending the night as far away from Jake as possible. He knew Jake brought that girl on purpose, maybe not just to irritate you, but to cause some sort of uproar.
Doing his best to get you out of your own head and enjoy yourself, Sam drags you to the makeshift dance floor when a familiar tune sounds out through the bar.
You groan, not really wanting to dance in the middle of this bar, despite the other couples dancing about. Sam’s bright smile is the only thing that convinces you to go lay it all out there with him. The both of you can’t dance to save your lives, but you can’t help but feel ten times lighter than you did before.
Sam twirls you around, laughing at your dazed out expression. Mid spin, your eyes catch Jakes’ for the second time tonight. Instead of caving in on yourself, you complete the spin, continuing your dance with Sam. Once the song came to an end, the two of you breathlessly bow, and saunter off the dance floor, hand in hand.
You can feel Jake’s eyes on you still, but you don’t give him the time of day. Walking past Jake and his guest, you latch onto Danny, slapping at his back playfully.
Sam returns to your side with what you think is another drink, but turns out to be just water. You gripe at his choice of beverage for you, but he waves you off, demanding you drink it.
“You two were really going at it out there, I think it's time to cut you both off,” Danny says, chuckling at your flushed faces.
Swishing your drink in his face, you say, “Sam already did, it's water.” Danny and Josh laugh at your clear disappointment.
“It’s probably a good thing he cut you off, wouldn’t want to embarrass yourself any further,” Jake chimes in, clearly proud of himself.
You ignore his statement, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of getting a rise out of you.
“Shut up, Jake.” Josh snaps back.
“Why should I? Are you really that desperate to get laid, that you have to grind on any guy that gives you attention?”
Dannys in Jake’s face in mere seconds, gripping him by his collar. “What the fuck did you just say to her?”
“You heard me.”
Danny rears back, every intention to beat him to a pulp. The other boys seem to be letting it happen, not putting a halt to it.
“Danny, stop. Leave him alone,” you demand.
“Y/n–”
“Stop Danny, unless you want to get kicked out of here.”
Not relenting, you glance at Danny, trying to plead with him. He reluctantly lets Jake go, walking away from him entirely.
Jake won’t make eye contact with you, looking anywhere else but at you.
“Fuck you, Jake,” you say storming off toward the bathroom.
The rest of the guys watch you intently, then turn right back to Jake after making sure you were safe. ___________________
Struggling to contain the tears, you look at your red splotchy face in the mirror. You clench your fist tightly, pacing around the small bathroom. Hearing a knock on the door, you start to tell them someone was in here, but whoever it is doesn’t let you finish.
“What do you want?”
Jake stands behind you, looking at you through the mirror. His face is ridden with guilt, but it doesn’t make you feel any better.
“I just wanted to apologize–”
“Don’t bother, I won’t forgive you.”
“Y/n, your being difficult, listen to me–”
Scoffing in disbelief, you spin around meeting him eye to eye.
“I’m being difficult, I’m being difficult. Are you fucking kidding me, Jake? Do you hear yourself?”
Cowering back at your words, he attempts to talk again, but you quickly shut him down.
“The fact that you have the balls to come in here, calling me difficult, after what you just said to me is truly insane. What is wrong with you? What the fuck did I ever do to you?” You breathlessly continue on, not caring what you look like. “I’ve tried and tried with you, and no matter what I do, you still treat me like shit. What happened that night at your house that made you hate me?”
“I don’t hate you, Y/n.”
“Ha! You have a special way of showing your love for me. If calling all your friends whores is your new thing, I think I'd rather not be your friend at all.”
“You're not a whore.”
“You're damn right I'm not. How do you expect me to respect you if–”
Without expecting it, you feel Jake’s lips on yours, cutting off your words. Tasting the alcohol on his breath, you abruptly shove him off and away from you.
“What is wrong with you?” you yell, tears streaming down your face.
“I don’t know why I did that, I'm so sorry.” Jake’s own eyes rim with tears. He tries to approach you again, but you shove past him, right out the bathroom door.
“Y/n, please wait. I’m so sorry,” he calls out to you, not caring about all the eyes on him.
Running up to Danny and Sam you begin to babble on. Your voice stutters and stumbles from the tears and hiccups spewing out of you.
“Take me home please, Sammy. Please take me home,” you softly beg, hugging onto Danny and Sam.
Without a second thought, they escort you right out of the bar, not even bothering to say goodbye. Danny gets the three of you in the car, starting the drive back to your place. Sam chooses to sit in the back with you, holding your crying form the whole way home.
Danny makes quick work of getting y’all home, toting you out of his car. Sam follows somberly behind the two of you, head hanging low. They help wash your ruined makeup off your face. Sam helps you change into comfy clothes, while Danny gets you some water and medicine for tomorrow morning.
The house is uneasily quiet, you hadn’t uttered a word since y’all left the bar. Danny gets you tucked, tightly in your bed. He whispers words that you don’t even attempt to hear, just closing your eyes entirely. They both go to leave your room, but your cracked voice stops them. “Please don’t go. Stay.”
“We aren’t leaving, honey. We're just going to sleep out in the living room,” Sam softly replies.
“Stay in here with me, please. I don’t wanna be alone.” “Okay, okay. We’ll stay, come on Sam,” Danny motions to Sam.
That night, Sam slept right next to you and Danny remained right behind him. The exhaustion of the night hits you, dragging you further and further into sleep.
_________________
Weeks have gone by since that horrific night in the bar. You made Danny promise not to say or do anything to Jake, even though you're still upset about the whole interaction. Instead of dwelling on it, you force yourself into long nights at work, not leaving any time to see anyone other than Danny.
He had said things in the studio had been quite hostile, since the blow out. Little did he know that things had gotten way worse, in that tiny bar bathroom. You choose not to tell him what Jake did in the bathroom. Having a feeling that this whole thing could lead to something worse for the band, you decide to keep it to yourself.
Sam has been debatably even more worried about you. You’ve been blowing him off, not wanting to do anything other than work or be at home alone. Feeling awful about ‘abandoning’ him, you finally agree to go out again.
They had promised Jake wouldn’t show, not even inviting him in the first place. A small sense of guilt crowded you, not wanting to be a reason for a fall out with his brothers. But, you couldn’t help the even smaller sense of victory that overwhelmed you. There was no way in hell, you wanted to deal with Jake tonight.
Going straight from work to the bar, you don’t bother to change your work clothes. Walking in, Danny meets you at the door, blocking your view of the room. Looking up at him, you can see the tense look in his eyes.
“He’s here, isn’t he?”
“I’m sorry, I swear we didn’t invite him.”
Holding up a hand to stop him, you say, “It’s fine. He has just as much right to be here as I do.”
“He’ll leave if I ask him.”
“Danny, it’s fine. I’m fine, really.”
He can see the exhaustion in your eyes, clearly from overworking yourself for weeks now.
“Come on, drinks on me tonight.”
Shuffling your feet behind him, you follow without question.
They had gotten a table tonight, not wanting to play any games. The moment you walked up to the table, everyone got quiet. Of course, the moment you look up, Jake’s remorseful eyes are boring into yours.
He looks like he wants to say something, but you don’t give him any time.
“I need a drink.”
You saunter off towards the older bartender, jumping atop a barstool.
Meanwhile, the whole table’s eyes follow you, watching you silently.
“She looks awful.”
Sam slaps Josh’s chest, telling him to shut up.
“She hasn’t been sleeping well. Plus she’s overworking herself like crazy, never taking a break,” Danny replies. Jake shifts in his seat, the awkward tension obvious. He had showed up tonight in hopes of seeing you actually. After all the shit he put you through, not just that night, but all the times before. You deserved a real apology. If he apologized and you still wanted to never see him again, he would be okay with it. Well, the selfish part of him wouldn’t be alright, but if it's what you truly wanted, he would do it for you. Watching you from here, it was evident you hadn’t slept in god knows how long.
Your body was slumped against the bar-top, throwing back whatever was in your cup. Danny has never seen you like this before. Most of the time your sadness transformed into rage, and didn’t die down until you released it. Seeing you in such a somber state, triggers the overprotective side of Danny like no other. Glancing over at Jake every now and then, he makes it clear that he means business.
Jake doesn’t even pay Danny any attention, which is pretty stupid of him to do, but all he cares about right now is apologizing to you. It's selfish of him truly, to want to make amends with you, even though you hadn’t done anything wrong. Jake had screwed up, not you.
The dimmed lights of the bar, drained your eyes of any color. Jake grimaced as he watched you order yet another drink, knowing tomorrow morning would be rough for you.
At this point, an hour or two had passed and you hadn’t made any move to go back to the table, allowing yourself to wallow in self pity for a while longer. You can still feel his eyes on you, completely ignoring the conversation around him. A part of you wants him to get it over with and come talk to you, even though that's the last thing you need right now. The other half of you wants to spin around, on your chair, and scream at him until he leaves forever. Throwing back yet another drink that's mainly vodka, you stumble off the barstool and right out of the bar's door.
No one seems to notice your absence, too consumed in their current conversation. Pacing across the barren sidewalk, your head snaps up when the door opens once again.
Jake stands in front of the closed door, frozen in his spot, not wanting to scare you off. Mockingly laughing at Jake’s ashamed and apologetic face.
“You have got to be kidding me.”
He remains a safe distance from you, not sure what direction this conversation will go.
“Y/n, I know you don’t want to talk to me right now, but–”
“You're right, I don’t.”
“Y/n please, please let me explain.”
“There's nothing to explain, Jake. Your a fucking asshole, I already knew that.”
He falters, already feeling lightheaded just talking to you. “I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, I'm not looking for it. Just please give me a chance to explain.”
You grow deadly silent, not feeling up to arguing with him. Jake takes your silence as permission to explain.
“I shouldn’t have said what I said that night. I didn’t mean it, I really don’t know why I said it. I think– I think I was just jealous, jealous of you and Sam.”
“You were jealous of me and Sam dancing, so you decided to call me a whore in front of all our friends?” “And I’m sorry for it. It shouldn’t have even come out of my mouth. Cause you're not, you're so far from it.”
Tears start to build up in your eyes, not just from the drowning sadness, but from the burning rage building inside.
“I shouldn’t have kissed you either, that was way out of line. I don’t know what I was thinking. I’m so disgusted and ashamed of myself.”
“You know what you're selfish, Jake. Your really fucking selfish.”
“I know I am, I know–”
“No, you fucking don’t. You don’t get it, do you? I’ve been waiting for that my whole life. And you took it away from me to prove a point. Kissing is one thing, but kissing you was a big deal to me, Jake.” Tears are pouring down your face, the lump in your throat building with every word. “For years, I’ve hidden my feelings for you. Watching you jump from girl to girl, mourning the fact that it would never be me. I know, it's different for you and I can’t blame you for not feeling anything for me. I’m just Danny’s annoying little sister that just won’t leave you alone. Trust me, the message is clear, I promise to never bother you again. But, don’t you ever try to pull that shit with me again, I have fucking feelings too, Jake.” You can’t even believe the words that have left your mouth, all that alcohol gives you liquid courage or stupidity. Jake stands before you, eyes welling up with tears, utterly silent. Tired and slightly embarrassed with this whole situation, you make a move to walk away, but Jake reaches out for you, latching onto your wrist.
“Let go, Jake. I want to go home.”
“You're drunk, you can’t drive yourself home.”
“Fine, I’ll walk.”
Yanking your hand away from him, you start to stumble off.
“You live twenty minutes away, you can’t walk home, Y/n.”
“Watch me.”
“Y/n, let me take you home,” he jogs up to you, pleading. “Not a chance.”
“Please, just let me get you home safe, and I promise not to bother you again.”
Your eyes were bloodshot and your feet throbbed painfully. Exhaustion overrides your thoughts. Alcohol swimming throughout your body, leaving you woozy. “Fine.”
Without missing a beat, you slowly follow Jake to his car, parked down the street.
The car ride back to your place was deadly silent. You regret ever telling him about your feelings, already knowing what he’s thinking. It didn’t matter now, it could only get worse from here.
Pulling up to your house, Jake hesitantly follows after you inside. Your head is cloudy and you feel your body swaying as you walk further in your house. Is it possible for alcohol to have a delayed effect? Yes absolutely, that's why your body decides to betray you, totally forgetting how to walk.
Jake stumbles behind you, trying to catch you before you meet the floor. Hanging in his arms, Jake tugs you to your feet.
“I can walk on my own, thank you,” you snide.
Still walking along with you, Jake takes you to your bedroom.
“I know, just let me help this once.”
You groan, mumbling snarky comments under your breath, but allow him to help you anyways.
The sun had long set, leaving your room pitch black dark. Jake blindly searches for the switch to the lamp beside your bed. Turning it on, he places you on your bed gently. Laying flat on your back, you stick your feet out towards Jake, insinuating that you want me to take your shoes off. A slight smile graces his face at your exhausted state. He tugs your work shoes off of you, placing them on the floor next to you. Tucking yourself into bed, you turn facing away from Jake, already falling asleep.
Jake waits a moment, gazing at your sleeping form.
“I’m really sorry, Y/n. Really, really sorry.”
Turning off the lamp, he makes his way out of your room. Starting to shut the door, he hears your cracked voice whisper softly.
“I forgive you, Jakey.”
__________________
“Oh god, how much did I drink last night?” replays in your mind as soon as you wake up the next morning.
The pounding headache and overwhelming nausea makes you curl further into the covers. Peeking an eye at the window, the sun shines high in the sky. It has to be mid-morning by now.
Everything from last night comes flooding back, causing you to wince, gritting your teeth. You're going to have to figure out how to never face Jake again. Maybe you should quit your job and move across the continent, then you would never have to see him again.
Rolling out of bed, you make the trek to the kitchen, needing to cure this hangover asap. You're still in your work clothes from yesterday, not even bothering to change at this point.
On the way to your kitchen, you notice a leg dangling from your couch.
Shit.
Looking over the side of the couch, you stare down at a sleeping Jake. You had thought he went home after dropping you off. Silently tip toeing, you continue to your kitchen regardless of the man on your couch.
________________
Jake wakes up to a loud clang from god knows where. Eyebrows furrowing in confusion, he spots a familiar photo, sitting atop a nearby shelf. It's an old photo from years ago, of you with all four boys at one of their first shows.
Hearing sizzling of some sort, Jake knows you're awake. Not bothering to get off the couch, he lets you come to him instead, not wanting to upset you any further. A few minutes go by and he hears your feet padding across the hardwood floor.
Not expecting him to be awake, you freeze standing awkwardly in front of him.
“You're awake.”
“I am.”
Tapping your foot against the floor, you try to think of something to say, but he beats you to it.
“I’m really sorry, Y/n.”
“Jake, it's fine really. Let's just pretend none of it happened.”
Looking up at you from the couch, he says, “I can’t do that. It's not fair to you.”
“Jake, really it's fine. I’m over it.”
“Well I’m not. I can’t just pretend like I didn’t hurt you. I won’t.”
“I made you breakfast, it's in the kitchen when you're ready.”
You scurry off, heading back into the kitchen, not wanting to continue this conversation. Jake follows you, not giving up on talking to you.
Standing in the kitchen together, you both stare each other down.
“Don’t walk away Y/n. Talk to me please, get mad at me, yell at me. I don’t care what you do, but please don’t pretend what happened last night didn't actually happen.” “What do you want me to say Jake?”
“Help me make it up to you.”
You rub your hands across your face in distress. “I don’t know how.”
Jake walks up close to you, clasping your cold hands in his. Looking at him in shock, you surprisingly allow him to continue.
“I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I'm asking for you to give me one chance to explain myself. Please, Y/n.”
Silence grew between you, but after a moment you finally spoke up.
“Fine, but you can explain yourself over breakfast.” Fixing both your plates, you take Jake out onto your back porch. You're going to need plenty of fresh air to handle Jake’s explanation. Jestering for him to start digging into his food.
“So...”
He looks up at you nervously, clearing his throat.
“I’m not sure where to start.”
“How about you explain how all of this got started, what did I do to make you push me away?”
“It wasn’t you, you didn’t do anything wrong. Do you remember that dinner party at Josh and I’s house, two years ago?”
Nodding at his question, his breath stutters.
“I had just gotten out of a relationship a week prior to that party, and Josh had insisted I attend it regardless of my situation. He just wanted me to get out of the funk I was in, but truthfully that was the last thing I wanted to do. When I had finally gathered the courage to walk out there, I saw you,” he continued, noting the gears turning in your head. “I don’t know what happened other than I was surprised to see you. It had been months since the last time I saw you, and something just changed about you. Not in a bad way of course, just made me rethink everything I knew about you.”
“I had changed. When I went away to school, I made an effort to do better, be better for myself. I focused on my mental health, I was ten times happier by the time you saw me again.”
“I could tell, your smile was radiant. I think my feelings changed for you that night. I stopped thinking of you as Danny’s little sister, and started thinking of you as Y/n. But we both know, had I ever told you how I felt Danny would have killed me. I also knew I was too screwed up, to ever deserve you. Especially now that I've made even more of a fool of myself.”
“Jake–”
“No really Y/n. I pushed you away to protect you, and partially myself. It was hard to be around you without feeling like my heart was going to beat out of my chest. I never thought you would think of me as anything other than Sam’s older brother, that was until last night. Which is why I needed to explain myself so I could truly apologize. I had no idea what that kiss would have meant to you, and I wish I could do it all over again.”
“You're such a dumbass. Of course, I fell in love with you. Who wouldn’t? Did you screw up and make shitty decisions? Obviously, but your human Jake. I think it's going to take some time to heal whatever we are, but I want to if you want to.”
Facing each other, you take Jake’s hands in yours, looking him in the eye.
“I will spend my life making it up to you, Y/n.”
Rolling your eyes playfully at his comment, you tug him closer to you.
“How about you start now?”
Grinning at you, he pulls you into a gentle yet passionate kiss.
“Danny’s going to kill us.”
The both of you die out laughing, falling into each other.
____________________
Weeks had passed since you and Jake had reconciled, starting a flourishing relationship.
Jake was heaven to be with, constantly pampering you with love. The only issue you’ve had was Danny.
You had made it a point to talk to your big brother, explaining everything that happened with Jake, minus the bar bathroom situation. Explaining that you two had made up and were great now, so Danny could go back to being best friends with Jake. He was hesitant about it, mostly because he didn’t want you to push everything under the rug so he could be friends with Jake again.
Little did he know, you and Jake were way more than friends, spending almost all of your free time together. Jake was prepared to tell Danny about the both of you, ready to be pummeled by the taller man. But, you had decided that you just wanted to stay in your little bubble for a while longer. The both of you snuck around like two teenagers, kissing on each other every chance you get. So, when Danny showed up to your house unannounced early one morning, you couldn’t help the panic that set in. You did your best to distract your big brother, walking him into your kitchen.
“I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever. Has work really been that crazy for you?”
“Oh yeah, they have been running me wild lately,” you say, thinking back to how you’ve really been spending your time in bed... with Jake.
“My hard working little sister, ahh i’m so proud of you,” Danny says, chuckling.
“Uhuh, sure.”
Walking to the fridge, you offer him a drink.
“Is that Sam’s shirt? Are you two swapping clothes again?” you question.
“No, for your information, he stole this shirt from me. Actually now that you mention it, where did you find that shirt?”
Looking down at the shirt you're currently wearing, your eyes widen in fear.
“Uh, I think I bought it at some thrift shop downtown. Why?”
“It's funny, cause I think Jake has a shirt just like it.” Shrugging your shoulders at his words, you try to change the topic.
“Do you have to go to the studio today?”
“Yeah later on this afternoon, that's why I stopped by this morning actually. Are you free tomorrow night? The guys want to go out again and we want you to come with us.” You turn towards the sink, placing the dishes in the dishwasher. “Yeah, sure. I may be a tad bit late because of work, but I can go.”
“Have you talked to Mom about that wedding we have to go to?” you ask, but silence follows your question. “Danny? Did you hear me–”
Spinning around in his direction, a squeak leaves your lips at the scene before you.
Jake stands, eyes wide in the kitchen, only wearing his boxers. Danny stares in surprise, eyes flitting back and forth between the two of you.
“Dan, I can explain–”
He holds up a hand to silence you.
“I see why you wanted to smooth things between me and Jake now.”
Jake remains silent, not wanting to make things worse by talking. His eyes meet yours, silently asking what he should do.
Looking over at Danny, you start to plead with him, trying to make him understand.
A smile breaks out upon Danny’s face, laughter spewing out. Panic and confusion spread throughout you, not sure what to do.
“I already knew about you two.”
“You knew?”
“Y’all aren’t exactly sneaky, especially this one here,” he points to Jake, who is still frozen in place.
“What did he do?”
“You should check his phone screen some time.”
“So, you're not mad?”
“No, I’m not mad. But, if you screw up again, I won’t hesitate to beat your ass,” he says pointedly at Jake.
Still silent, Jake profusely nods in response. Danny gets up from his spot at the table, walking over to you. Pulling you into a hug, he pats your back.
“I’m happy for you.”
Pulling away from you, Danny walks over, grabbing his keys off the bartop. “I’m going to get out of here. It’s nauseating to think about Jake spending the night here.” Patting Jake on the shoulder, he continues his stroll to your front door.
“Love you, Dan,” you shout.
“Love you too, kiddo,” he says, shutting the door behind him.
Finally, it's just you and Jake alone in the kitchen, staring at each other.
“Well, that went better than I thought it would.”
“Honey, I’m in my underwear.”
“At least I wasn’t in my underwear,” you say reassuringly. Trotting over to Jake, you wrap your arms around his neck. “I’m so embarrassed,” he says, tucking his face into the crook of your neck.
Whispering into his ear, “I bet I can make you feel better.” “You're unsustainable, woman,” his body tensed at your words.
Releasing your grip on him, you walk away towards your bedroom.
“Better get used to it, Jakey.”
Jake watched the sway of your hips, smiling at your words.
Reaching the doorway of your bedroom, you look over your shoulder at him. “You coming?”
Striding after you, he chases you into your bedroom. “Yes, ma’am.”
Giggles die out between you two, your cheeks hurting from your wide smiles. Wrapped up in your own little world with him, utterly blissful.
No matter what happens, you can always count on Jake to be by your side. The past remains forgotten and the present full of unyielding love. Who knows what the future holds, as long as you have Jake, you're okay with the uncertainty.
—————————————
Thanks for reading!! Hope you enjoyed:)))
157 notes · View notes
ficthots · 1 year
Text
Uncharted Territory II
Tumblr media
A/N: Surprise! You guys asked for it so here it is. This is literally the fastest turnaround I've ever had on a piece. I hope you guys enjoy and let me know what you think! (Also, this is the smile/smirk I'm talking about...you'll know what I mean as you read further)
Part I
Warnings: SMUT. DNI if you are under 18. 18+ content only
Word Count: 7.8k+
Rules are rules. They serve a purpose to bring order to a world filled to the brim with chaos. Even when rules aren’t explicitly laid out, there are some loose ones that still bring some sense of structure. That’s why they’re there. 
Which is also why they are so incredibly fun to break. 
Being a rule breaker wasn’t your thing, still isn’t if you’re being totally honest. Yet, when you get to do it with him it’s an adrenaline rush. A high that nothing can be compared to that even the strongest illicit materials couldn’t match. A thrill that starts at the very top of your head and spreads down to the tips of your toes. 
It happens whenever his hands land on you. Especially in times when they shouldn’t be. For example, last night at the band dinner. You were seated directly next to your boss, his brothers and their own assistants in other seats, some other tour members there as well. It started simple, his fingertips lightly brushing the smooth skin on the back of your hand. 
Nothing that would’ve been noticed. 
Playing it cool as his touch grew deeper than the featherlight one he had been teasing you with. Moving from your hand to your bare knee. Opting for a dress this evening proved to be a good choice. Or was it? 
His hand splayed across the skin, the table cloth covering any and all movements from the others. Your breathing was fluctuating despite your best efforts to keep it steady and even. When his hand continued its trek up wards, landing extremely high on the inside of your thigh, you coughed into your drink.
Bob’s hand landing harshly on your back as you did. “Don’t go choking on me now, kiddo,” you shot him a tight lipped smile, seeing the amusement dancing in the eyes of Josh. He never did remove his hand that night. 
When you got back to the hotel room, it was in the dead of night when you heard your door open. You were already up and waiting for him. He wasted little time as he undressed on his way over to you, giggles mixing in with his words. “I thought you were gonna squeal at dinner, birdie girl. You did good, I was pleasantly surprised.”
Humming into his mouth, plush lips hastily meeting yours, you could feel the vibrations of his laughter. “You need to give me more credit then that, Mr. Kiszka,” as those words left your mouth, one of his hands that cradled the back of your neck moved upward, grabbing a fistful of hair and tugging your head back with a gasp.
“Prove it to me.”
And that was just one of the incidents. 
These were a regular occurrence now between you two. Anytime Josh could be physical with you, in what way it didn’t seem to matter, he would. A flat palm against your lower back as you walked through a crowd together. Showing him something on your phone, he would stand as close to you as he could, all limbs rubbing against each others. Never staying in his hotel room anymore, opting for yours and your bed any chance he could.
It was a habit to get two keys for your own room now. One for you and one for him. He would wait until he was certain everyone had been confined to their own rooms for the evening, then you would hear the beep of the door lock signaling his arrival, seconds later you would be entangled with him for the rest of the evening. An alarm would go off at five in the morning, he would slink back to his room, reappear just a few hours later like he had been there the entire time.
Nothing out of the ordinary.
Work carried on the same. Taking your job and responsibilities extremely seriously, Josh not interfering with that, mostly, and then sprinkling in fun when you could. Did an odd feeling worm its way into your gut every once in a while as you would observe him from across the room? 
That is your boss! What the hell are you doing? This isn’t going to end well. You know it won’t. Stop it now before it gets worse!
Not exactly. It didn’t matter anyways because those thoughts were always quelled almost as quickly as they came. All in part to how incredibly sweet he was. Showing you affection in subtle, and not so subtle, ways. 
Last week as you checked in to a hotel, the receptionist informed you that there was already a delivery waiting for you. A large bouquet of flowers sat on the back desk and when she handed them to you, you could feel the rise in heat creeping onto your cheeks and neck. A chorus of oh’s and ah’s flowed from the group, Sam pestering you about who sent them.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I feel best when I’m in bed with you. And some other sweet crap, too. -J
Biting back laughter at the absurd note, fighting the urge to roll your eyes, your gaze fell to him standing at the back of the group. The apples of his cheeks turning a light pink, eyes darting down to his dirty shoes, unable to hold the contact. 
“Don’t worry about it nosey!” Sam grumbled as you pulled the card closer to your chest, not letting him see whatever the message read. It held a smile on your face the remainder of the day. When you heard your door unlock that night, instead of waiting on the bed for him, you stood by the desk where the flower arrangement sat. 
Grabbing a flower from the bunch and playing with it in your fingers, you fought off a grin, the other hand holding the card. “Roses are red, violets are blue, I feel best when I’m in bed with you,” eyes bouncing up to see his cocky smirk decorating his lips, you continued, “and some other sweet crap, too. J.”
Sighing, over dramatically and falling to the bed with a bounce, clutching the two items to your torso, you giggled. “You really know how to treat a lady, Mr. Kiszka.” He collapsed next to you, resting his head on his palm, peering down at you. “Only the best for my birdie.”
As his lips began an attack on your neck, the flower and card fell from your hands, going to tangle into his locks. Eyes slipping shut as the heavenly feeling of his wandering hands began, you had never felt so content. 
Your boss. This is your boss. Now he’s sending presents? You’re crossing a line. 
Thoughts diminishing as his hands slipped under your t-shirt, feeling the bare warm skin greeting him underneath, already reacting with excitement at his welcome. 
His fingers pinched your perked nipples, continuing further up and removing the shirt from your frame. Lips attaching to your breast, your back arched into him. A gasp echoed out into the quiet room. Hardly able to keep your eyes open as he pressed his hardening cock against your core, you moaned. 
“Josh, please.” His smirk met you, teeth pulling at your lip as he teased you. “Please what, baby? Use your words.” You didn’t even care how needy you sounded, just wanting him. “You, anything, please.”
His lips landed softly between your brows on the wrinkled skin there. “I’m going to take care of you, sweet girl. Don’t worry.” And he did. Entirely abandoning his own care for the first half of the evening, you were on the verge of black out as he brought you to finish after finish.
By the time he was ready to go with you, you were a limp mess. Only a form of pleases falling from you, drunk on the feelings holding firm. The sheets a soaked through mess, bodies sticking together as he held you, your slick coating both of your bodies from your dripping core. 
You weren’t sure you were going to be able to walk the next day, but you didn’t care. You would let him do anything to you as long as it was Josh doing it. Not a care in the world as long as you were with him.
Things continued to grow further along those lines, crossing over from a casual fling to a romantic entanglement. Not just from his side. 
You were doing a check of the venue before the show that evening, going through the checklist you had memorized long ago when you heard one of the stagehands whispering to a coworker, peaking your interest. 
“Yeah dude, he cut it all. It’s like a fauxhawk mohawk thing.” Immediately listening to attempt to figure out who they were talking about, your mind instantly went to your boss. Yet, this could be a Danny move. He is going through a total rebranding right now. Odd move for him though. 
“Sides totally shaved, permed of course.” Permed. Josh. He cut his hair? When the hell did he do that? Was it on his schedule? Son of a bitch went rogue. That means he skipped something this afternoon because it was a jammed day.
Pulling out the schedule for the day, your eyes skimmed all the tasks he needed to complete, trying to figure out what he could have missed. Irritation starting to seep into you, it came to a halt when you heard the man's next words. “He looks like a moron. It’s like a weird mullet thing. Looks terrible,” turning and facing the guy, you walked over to him, a sickly sweet smile adorning your face. 
“Hi! I don’t believe we’ve met,” sticking your hand out for a shake, the guy hissed at the firm grip you offered, eyes wide in confusion. “I’m Mr. Josh Kiszka’s assistant. I would just like to offer a gentle reminder to watch your words and attitudes whilst at work. You never know who’s listening and speaking ill of your boss,” placing a heavy emphasis on the word, you watched as he thickly swallowed, “is not a wise choice. Now, I know these cases do not belong in this area. If you could get them to their correct location I would greatly appreciate it.”
They didn’t hesitate, quickly turning and grabbing the ones you pointed to, loading them on a cart and began pushing it. Offering a small apology as they hustled away from you. When a laugh behind you startled you, turning to see the signature hat, you smiled at him.
“Standing up for Josh. Very nice,” your eyes slightly narrowed, his voice dripping with an insinuation. “Of course, Mr. Kiszka. Given he is my boss and theirs I would do it for any of you in a heartbeat.” His eyes rolled at your words, a smirk tugging at his lips. 
Walking past you, his hand patted your shoulder, leaning ever so lightly towards you to lower his voice. “You keep telling yourself that.” Before you could speak again, his new permed due came from around the corner.
A large smile on his face, trying to nonchalantly walk towards you as you giggled at his moves. “Looking great, sir.” Leaning against a wall, his eyebrows shot up, looking around to see if you were talking to him. His finger pointed at himself as he spoke. 
“Oh, me? Thank you, thank you. Groupies are gonna go crazy for it,” your lips pushed into your mouth, trying to stifle your laughter, clipboard resting in front of you. “Of course, sir.” 
He quickly looked around, moving closer to you, you meeting him halfway. His hands landed on your hips, tugging you closer to him, chin tilted down as a lazy smile grew on his face. 
Your favorite smile. The one he knew drove you crazy. Where it was so effortless and showcased his features beautifully. It made your knees weak. Somehow looking even better with the new hair.
Nudging his nose into your cheek, his lips crested on the shell of your ear sending a chill down your spine. “What about my favorite groupie? Digging me still?” 
You could hardly get a response out, overwhelmed by the all encompassing energy of Josh. His cologne filling your senses, his cocky attitude, that stupid grin on his perfect lips, hands resting so firmly on your hips. You wanted to devour him.
Your own arms wrapped around his middle, leaning back to get a better view. There was no chance of letting him off that easily. As easy as he knew you felt right now. “It’ll take some time to get used to, Mr. Kiszka.” 
He hummed, nodding at your words. Mouth going back towards your side, voice dropping as he spoke. “Say my name, birdie.” The assertive tone he spoke in had you melting into a pool at his feet. Instantly becoming putty for him to meld with his own hands.
“Whatever you say, Mr. Kiszka.” His smirk grew, tongue caressing his teeth as he eyed you. “That's how we’re playing this?” You only blinked at him, offering nothing else in return.
His hands retreated from you despite only wanting to remain in his embrace for the rest of time, your body erupting in goosebumps at his next statement. 
“Be in my dressing room in five minutes.” 
When you got to the door, Josh was waiting on the other side for you. Shutting it behind you with one last look around to make sure the coast was clear, his palm landed directly next to your head, caging you in. 
Pushing your hair to the side, crotch pressing into your ass, you felt his breath fan across the back of your neck. “Good girl. Doing exactly as I say,” your eyes shut, swallowing a shaky breath. “Of course, Mr. Kiszka.” His hand wrapped around your locks, tugging your head back.
The sharp tip of his nose traced your pulse point, running up and down your exposed neck. “Say my name.” Not giving in, his lips pursed on the warm skin. Nipping at the flesh, eliciting a hiss from you, he didn’t relent on his grip.
With you still pressed soundly against the door, you heard his zipper on his jumpsuit coming undone. “Pull down your pants. Now.” Confusion rippled through you at the order, but you did as he said. “No, underwear stays up.” Your hands faltered, hearing the husky nature of his voice, but putting your panties back in place. 
“You want to play the quiet game with me? That’s fine, mama,” your breathing grew shallower as you felt the bare skin of his cock rub against the inside of your thigh, precum painting you from his weeping tip, “but I’m going to fuck you right here. And you need to be utterly silent. Not a peep. Otherwise everyone out there will hear you and know what’s happening in here.”
Your eyes went wide as you felt the crotch of your panties move to the side, rubbing harshly against your clit. The tip of him broke your entrance, a moan tumbling from you. He removed himself as quickly as he had gone in. A rough tug of your hair brought you back.
“What did I say? Not. A. Peep.” At the end of his sentence, he fully seated himself in your cunt. Nearly collapsing onto the door, one arm wrapped around your waist, effectively holding you up. Biting down on your tongue to not let a singular noise out, you struggled to keep your eyes open. 
Josh wasted no time, effectively pounding into you, your legs slowly parting further and further with each thrust. His own feet kicked yours back into place, struggling to speak through his own panting breath. “Keep your feet still. Don’t let them move, understand?” You nodded, a whimper falling from you moments later.
His large hand slapped over your mouth, wide eyes staring into your own heavy lidded ones. “Can’t keep quiet, birdie girl? That’s fine. Say my name then.” Refusing to give in, your forehead rested on the cool thin door. Hand splayed on it to steady yourself with the punishing pace, you could feel your orgasm approaching. 
With a few flutters of your walls, Josh spoke again, sweat dripping down his temples. “Oh, you’re close, mama. I can-I can feel it, sweet girl. C’mon, finish for me. You’ve been so good, do it.” With his words of encouragement, you fell over the edge.
Body going rigid and weak, his hand left your mouth the minute it came to you. Tiny whimpers and one small word left your lips. As he heard his name moaned out, it pushed him to his own climax. The small ego boost of hearing his name come from you as you came on him was sending him to another plane of existence. 
When he pulled out from you, he fixed your underwear, patting the crotch that was catching your mixed releases. “Hold onto that for me, ‘kay? I’ll check on it later tonight,” he spun you around as he spoke, connecting you both in a gentle kiss.
“Really, what do you think?” As he readjusted his suit, checking himself in the mirror, he watched your reflection, seeing your blissed out face meeting him with a smile. “It looks great, Josh. I love it and they’re all going to love it too. Promise.” 
He nodded, eyes only able to look at the smooth tabletop of the dressing table, you kissed his velvet clad shoulder, telling him you still had some duties to do before the show. He stopped you before you could slip out, pretending to fix your hair while he asked you the most important question he ever had. 
“So-um. I was wondering if, I don’t know, maybe you might want to stay for the show. Just tonight, you know? I know you typically go sleep during the show, but I don’t know, I was thinking maybe just for tonight-” you cut him off, hands cradling his jaw as you kissed him, shutting up his nervous chatter.
Agreeing to stay for the show was everything he had been hoping for and then some. It was the best news of his life. 
That was one of the best shows of the tour. Josh’s confidence boost only perfected his stage presence even more. It was also the first show you had stayed to watch despite how truly exhausted you were. Not only from the extracurricular activities that took up your afternoon, but your work responsibilities, too.
He knew you were watching that night. It was why he went above and beyond. To truly show what he did and why he was so damn good at it. Almost needing to prove himself to you. 
It was worth it.
Nearly the next two weeks were going to be a break. A break from life on the road, your job, all of it. Your heart slightly ached at the thought of being away from Josh for two weeks. 
The longest you two were going to be apart for the first time in nearly a year. It was going to be odd. Not having him taking up every waking moment of your day. 
That’s good. Space is exactly what you need from him. It’ll put things in perspective for you. About how out of control this situation has gotten. 
It didn’t last long. In fact, it didn’t happen at all. The night you got home, Josh offered to drive you back to your apartment. Hastily agreeing after not being able to sleep with him for three nights, Josh had you pressed against the elevator walls.
His mouth fighting for dominance with yours. Your hands tangled in his hair. His knee shoved between your legs. Breath mingling in short exasperated spurts. 
Hardly separating the entire way to your door, your hands trembled as you tried to unlock it. When you opened the door, Josh’s hands were on your hips, leading you into the house, but immediately dropped when the yells rang out into the air.
“Welcome home, birdie!” You screamed, jumping back into Josh as his hands stilled you, his own yell echoing through the apartment. Hand over your heart, you were trying to catch your breath as your mom and siblings laughter wracked their bodies.
Hunching over, you started laughing with them. “Jesus. What the hell, mom?” Crossing the room, she embraced you in a monstrous hug. Feeling the comfort of your moms hug nearly brought tears to your eyes as she rocked you back and forth, hand smoothing your hair. 
Her laughter mixed with her words as she spoke. “Wanted to surprise you! The kids were dying to see you,” you pulled back, feeling them grab you into another hug. 
Your mom crossed the space and beamed at Josh. “You must be Mr. Kiszka! It’s such a pleasure to meet you. Thank you for driving her home, I know she left her car here.” Josh’s bright red face let on to how excited and slightly uncomfortable he felt at that moment.
Eyes falling to you and seeing your easy smile signaled he was okay to continue talking with her as you spoke with your brother and sister. “Of course. I wanted to make sure she got home okay. I should really be going though,” your head snapped in his direction, nodding in agreement with him.
“Thank you again for the ride. If you need anything,” your mom waved you off, pulling Josh towards your couch. “Nonsense. We got a bunch of food and you’re more than welcome to join us.”
Your eyes went wide, trying to say otherwise, but she hushed you. “Birdie! Be polite to your boss. He was kind enough to drive you home. The least you can do is invite him to stay for dinner. Jesus, where are your manners?” 
There it was. That feeling again. 
Reality is creeping in. Look at how your mom and siblings are talking with him. You’re sleeping with him. What would your mom say about that? He’s your boss for crying out loud. Look at what’s happening right now. 
Remaining silent for a majority of the night as he told story after story to entertain everyone, clearly enjoying getting in with you like this. All you could think about was how inappropriate this was. How well he was getting along with your mom and brother and sister. This wasn’t okay.
It’s gone too far.
When Josh left that night, you didn’t see him for the remainder of the break. You lied and said you flew back to California to spend time with them. He didn’t second guess it. Hardly even having communication with him was good. Hard? Sure, but what you needed to take in the reality of what was happening. 
Instead, you moped around your house after your mom had left to go back home two days later. The remainder of the break was spent wallowing alone. Trying to figure out where the line had been crossed. Why you didn’t catch it sooner. How you could be so careless and stupid.
Your mother almost caught you. With your boss. That was a new low for you. As the time flew by on the break, you found yourself filled with another sense of dread with having to face him. Having to do what you needed to. 
Cutting this off. Ending it before it turned out poorly for one, or worse, both of you. Choosing to remain distant once back on the road had Josh spinning. You had left for break on good terms. What the hell happened? Did he say something to your mom that offended her or you? 
Constantly wracking his brain whenever he tried to make a move towards you and you would shut it down. You were hardly even speaking to him anymore. If it wasn’t to do with work matters, you were far away. It was driving him mad. 
Finally cornering you one night after a show, he shut the door to his dressing room as you checked on his vitamins to ensure they were there for him for the post show check. When the door clicked behind you, a small sigh fell from your lips. 
Dread. 
“What’s going on with you? Did I do something to upset you?” He was whispering, speaking low so no one could hear from the other side of the door. Facing him, you shook your head, exhaustion grabbing hold of your body. “No.” 
His brow furrowed, moving closer to you. When his hand reached out to grab your own, you moved back out of his reach. Head cocking to the side, eyes wild with confusion, he scoffed. “That right there! That’s what I’m talking about. Are you alright? What did I do?” 
His tone was picking up, speaking faster the more frustrated he became. Still speaking quietly, but the bite in his words still present had you growing flustered. Arms crossing over your chest, tongue poking into the side of your cheek, you were battling in yourself. 
Do it. Draw the line. Create the boundary. Check his limits. Make him understand what this is.
Eyes slipping shut, shaking your head, you looked back at him. “I don’t understand why you’re getting so frustrated. All this was, was sleeping together. If you need it that bad, then go get it somewhere else. There’s a whole army of girls out there that will fall to their knees for you in a heartbeat.”
That got him. His mouth was agape, eyes wide in shock, unable to move. Still clad in his stage garb, rhinestones adorned on his flush cheeks, bare feet rooted to the ground, he was a spectacle to witness. It made it all the harder. 
“I need to get changed.” It was at a normal volume, eyes peeled away from yours, unable to look at you. Slipping past him, your shoulder brushed his chest as you opened the door. The heat that emanated from him encompassed you from just the miniscule contact. When you closed it behind you a shaky breath fell from your lips, looking at your checklist to see what you needed to do next. 
The tremble in your hands growing worse by the minute. 
You were in this town for a couple of days, the next being an off day. Josh shrugged off the night before. He thought maybe you were just having an off couple of days. It was bound to happen. Everyone had their share of bad moods after being on the road for so long. He figured that you were just going through yours. 
It was the next afternoon when you were asked by the group if you would accompany them on an evening out. Bar hopping through the vibrant downtown nightlife. His eyes were hopeful, peering at you, basically begging you. 
You declined. 
Instead opting to spend the night alone taking yourself out to dinner, calling your mom, and taking a brisk stroll. Should you have been out by yourself that late? No, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. 
Depressing. That was the only way to describe the missing enigma that was Josh. Having crossed the threshold that you did with him, then going to plainly ignoring him. Rough. As you continued wandering around the more it slapped you in the face. 
Was he your boss? Yes. Honestly, did it matter? Your work was still the same, productivity still incredibly high. You meshed so well together. You knew the man inside and out. The second he started slipping into your world, you freaked out, not having had that happen before. It was different. Something you needed to get used to. Could you get used to Josh in your bubble? Yes, you could. Then what was the problem? 
The fear of rejection? Of him growing tired of you once the tour was over? That wasn’t Josh and you knew it. It was playing a side of life you hadn’t before. Of being a little dangerous. Doing something you weren’t technically supposed to. 
But it was Josh.
Speed walking back to the hotel, you knew you needed to fix this. The chilly air nipped at your cheeks as you hurried back to the building. You wanted to talk to him, explain what the issue was. How you weren’t afraid anymore. If Josh was there with you, it would be fine. 
 Hitting the floor button multiple times, trying to speed up the elevator to get to the correct floor, you could feel your smile growing. This was right. It was Josh. This is what you need to do right now. Where you should be.
As the doors opened to the floor, you rooted to your spot as he filled your vision. He was facing you, eyes closed as the girl that was attached to him fumbled with the hotel room door. The ding of the elevator had gotten his attention, when he saw you standing there taking in his actions, he wanted to die.
Never having seen that expression on your face before, it broke him. He never wanted to see that again. The total anguish that morphed your features into one of pain. That he was the cause of. 
The doors shut, you not having left the elevator, you rode it back down to the lobby. Danny and Sam stood at the exit, confused as to where you were going this late, questions filling the air around you. “Out,” was your only response to them.
Danny quickly called out after you as you continued walking towards the front entrance. “I don’t think that’s a good idea! It’s really late. If you want to go out, I’ll go with you, but I cannot in good conscience let you go out alone.” You stopped in your tracks, jaw setting as you played your options in your mind.
Turning on your heel, you plastered the best faux smile you could onto your face. “No, you’re right. It’s too late. I’ll just head up and hang out in the room.” His smile grew, taking it as a victory as you walked back to the elevator with him, Sam still watching you two as you reapproached him.
His scrutinizing gaze held your body as you walked past him into the elevator. “You sure you’re alright? Acting a little squirrely,” you shrugged, trying to play off what had just happened. “Totally fine. Just having a hard time trying to sleep so I was going on a walk to tire myself out.” 
The elevator doors opening to your floor was a haven. The two still needing to ride up a couple more floors, you bid them goodnight, waving over your shoulder as they continued their trek upwards. Rushing to your own door, flying by his, you got it open as you heard another one creek into the hallway.
With the door closed, your forehead rested against the cool wood. Your eyes squeezed shut, trying to tamp down the horrible feeling worming its way into you. Jumping with a small yelp, there was a thumping on the other side of the door.
Peering out the peephole, he stood on the other side. Not looking at the door, but instead eyes downcast, hands on his hips as he listened for movement. “Birdie. I know you’re in there. I saw you run down the hall.” 
Backing away from the door, you didn’t want to deal with this. Not tonight. Not right now. Emotions too high. Feelings too much. You heard his loud sigh and the sound of something running along the door. 
“Okay, well I’ll be here when you’re ready to talk. Not going anywhere.” His grunt as he firmly planted his ass on the carpeted ground echoed out into the hall. What the hell did he think he was doing? He looks like a fucking crazy person sitting out there like that. Fine, he wants to do this, then we’ll do this.
Storming over to the door and throwing it open, his expectant eyes looked up at you where the door once rested. Once they connected with your fiery ones, he knew it was about to happen. Standing and entering your room, following after you, the door shut letting you both know you could start. 
“You’re mad.” He finally started after you refused to break the silence. Scoffing at him and rolling your eyes, your arms crossed soundly over your chest. “Obviously.” He shrugged, tongue darting out and laying flat on his bottom lip, thumb brushing over the skin. “You have no right to be upset.”
You could’ve sworn at that exact moment your eyes could have bugged out of your head and onto the floor below. “Excuse me?” His hands went up in the air before landing on his head, exasperated with the entire events of the last few days.
“Birdie, you wanted this! You wouldn’t talk to me, look at me, interact with me, nothing. I ask you what’s wrong wanting to fix this and you tell me that I need to go sleep with other girls because that’s what this is. That all you and I have is sex.” Shaking your head, you could feel tears welling in your eyes.
That was exactly what you had said, but it wasn’t what you meant. Not in the slightest. Sniffling into the room you cleared your throat before speaking. “I know,” his face went into his hands, falling away and eyeing you like you were absolutely crazy.
“Then I have no idea what the problem is.” Gaining the courage to look into his eyes, you sighed. “I don’t want you sleeping with anyone, Josh.” Deciding in a moment's notice that this needed to be done right then, not letting him speak, you continued on. “I like you. A lot. I don’t want you sleeping with anyone.” 
Your voice had quieted, the loud tone gone. Josh’s voice evened to match yours. “Then, why the hell did you say that?” Plopping down on the edge of the mattress, you struggled to put it into words, a total word vomit exploding from you. 
“Because this is moving so fast! I-I feel like we’ve skipped every single dating step. I know everything there is to know about you. You met my family!” Trying to calm down, you took a deep breath. “It’s just a lot. Not to mention you’re still my boss.” A sigh fell from the boy's lips, crouching down and his palms laying flat on the tops of your thighs.
When his lips landed on your forehead, he stood, kicking his shoes off and laying on the bed with a loud groan. Making a show of trying to get comfortable, he moved the pillows around, turned on the lamps on both nightstand tables, and patted the spot next to him. 
Your furrowed brows showed you didn’t understand what he was doing. “Tell me everything about you. I want to know it all.” Hesitating, he spoke before you could, reassuring words washing over you. “I like you, birdie. A lot. This is more to me than just sex. I hope you know that. We have nowhere to be so you and I are gonna sit here all night and you’re going to tell me every detail about your life. I want to know it all.”
Feeling your eyes burn with tears, your head fell forward, walking towards your side of the bed and sitting criss-cross applesauce. Wracking your brain about if this was the right thing to do, you decided it was. It absolutely was. 
“I grew up in California with my mom and brother and sister. It had been just us since I was nine years old.” That was just the start. 
You two stayed up all night as you shared every minute speckle of information you could think of to him. He ate it up. It was like the best story he had ever heard. Enamored with how you became the person you were. What you had to go through and endure just to get where you were now. It was inspiring. 
It was like he was looking at you in an entirely different light. Somehow one that made him fall for you even more. He didn’t think that was possible, but there it was. With every sentence you spoke, he hung on each word. Inching closer to him as the night went on, you weren’t sure when, but at some point you two had fallen asleep together. 
Completely entangled in the others limbs, your head resting on his arm, fingers tangled together, legs meshed as one, his free arm tucked behind his head, your free one draped across his torso. You felt no remorse or guilt about having shared what you did. A new line, a new set of rules had to be made, but you were fine with that. 
It was something that could happen as time went on, drafting them and redrafting them together. Establishing new boundaries with one another instead of you creating imaginary ones in your mind. No, this needed to be done together. 
Excitement. 
The butterflies danced in your stomach as you walked some city streets with Josh, dressed up just a bit. He had slipped a note under your papers on your clipboard knowing that you checked them all at the end of the night and you were in awe when you read it. 
Roses are red, violets are blue, it would be an honor to go on a first date with you. -J
(This part doesn’t rhyme, but be dressed and ready tomorrow night at nine. A little nice. Nothing too much. Okay I think that’s all. If there’s more I’ll just text you)
You giggled uncontrollably at the adorable note, stashing it away with the other he had written for you before. Spending far too much time getting primped and ready for your date with him, you couldn’t fight the nerves pounding you. 
This was different from all of the other hangouts you did. There was more pressure. An actual date. 
When Josh lightly knocked at your door, you saw him slightly dressed up and whistled as you took him in. “Looking sharp, Mr. Kiszka.” He did a small twirl, cheeks growing pinker by the second as he eyed you in your outfit. 
“I can say the same about you.” He immediately took your hand, running down the hallway together, trying to avoid anyone and everyone so as not to be seen going out together. The entire walk to the restaurant was quiet, but comfortable. Excitement and nerves wracking you both. 
As you two were about to walk into the front doors, he stopped, pulling you back towards him and smiling brightly at you. “I hate first dates. They’re awkward and hard. Why don’t we just make it as casual as we can. It’s still us.” Taking a deep breath at his words, you nodded in agreement, squeezing his hand as he leaned in, placing a light kiss to your lips. 
Like breathing in new life, it invigorated you. Bringing you back to the moment and who you were really here with. Not a stranger, the complete opposite. Someone you knew like the back of your hand and vice versa. There was no need for it to be weird.
The evening was one of the best you two had spent together. Fantastic food, many laughs, it made you think back to France. The night it all changed. As you sipped your glass, Josh caught his breath from laughing at a story about his brothers in high school. 
“You know this isn’t our first date?” You set your glass down, eyebrows going up as you uttered those words. “At least, I don’t count it as our first.” His brow furrowed, shaking his head as he thought about it. 
When it dawned on him, he smiled, face tinting. “France.” You both spoke out at the same time. Thinking fondly back to that night, you watched as he swallowed thickly, standing from the table and taking your hand in his. 
Rushing back to the hotel room, you played into the first date theme of the evening. Once the door shut behind you both, Josh’s lips landed firmly on your collarbones, dusting them with kisses. “I normally don’t put out on the first date. I hate to have given you that impression twice,” your breath caught in your throat as you felt his breath fan against your skin with a laugh.
Hands cupping your cheeks, tucking the hair behind your ears, his beaming smile greeted you as he held eye contact with you. “Well I normally am not in love on the first date. I hate to have given you that impression twice,” he pulled you towards him, lips meeting in a gentle fashion. No rush, no time frame to follow.
Just you two, reveling in that moment. 
Sweat glistened on both of your bodies, Josh sitting up against the headboard, you in his lap, legs on either side of his frame, lightly moving as you breathed the other in. Hair stuck to napes of necks, arms wrapped securely around your waist to ensure you couldn’t escape, panting moans falling into the room. 
It was heaven. Being with him like this. In such a natural and graceful form. Where you two melded together as one. I love you’s whispered out, afraid to fall to anyone else's ears, only meant for the lover they held. 
Reaching peaks together as white hot passion blinded you. Head falling back, exposing the expanse of your neck, he pulled you back to him, not wanting you to go so far. Feeling him seep out of you, back onto his still hard shaft. The most intense end you had ever reached in your life. 
Knowing you would never have a session like this again. Where so much was shared without a single word uttered than the bare necessities. Going down to the bare roots and core of your partner. Feeling the indents his fingertips were going to leave for days to come. A scalding memory of the night. 
One you would never forget. 
Secret rendezvous and dates became a normality for you two on the road. Long after the posse had retreated for the night, Josh would come to your door and whisk you away for as long as he could. Sometimes for the entire night, others for as little as a half an hour. It didn’t matter as long as he had some time with you. It was all he needed. All he craved. 
Stolen glances and touches were shared more and more. Getting more confident with each move, you started initiating some. Much to Josh’s surprise. You never did falter and call him by his first name in front of everyone though. Still holding firm to your job and its duties was still of the utmost importance to you.
It’s why when his mom came to a show, you were on top of your game. Wanting him to spend as much time with her as he could, you took over even more. He spoke of his mom so often to you, he obviously loved her dearly. Wanting you to meet her as his partner was just not in the cards right now. Instead, you were introduced as his assistant. 
Staying and chatting with her for a bit as he changed into his show garb, filming a video with her as a cameo had giggles and laughter fluttering from everyone. You knew where he got his light and spark from. 
When it was show time, Josh’s hand squeezed yours a second longer than he should have. His mom watched from afar the little motion, her eyebrow shooting up at it. Watching as her son's gaze held you even after your attention had turned to continue doing your job. 
She bit back a smile, feeling the giddy sensation fill her at what she was witnessing. “Mrs. Kiszka, can I take you to your seat?” You offered and she agreed, walking slowly with you to where her dedicated seat was for the show. 
“How are you and Josh getting along? I know he can be a lot to handle,” you laughed at her words, shrugging as you did. “Great! Mr. Kiszka is easy to work with actually.” She hummed, turning to face you fully as her hand landed on your cheek with a light pat. 
Sighing, she offered a gentle smile. “I see why he loves you,” your jaw fell open, shaking your head, but her bubbling laugh filled the space. “Oh, honey. It’s so obvious, I’m shocked no one else has caught on. Maybe it’s because I’m his mother, but the way he looks at you is like nothing I’ve ever seen.”
Unsure how to respond, not knowing if you should just give in or deny, she held her hands up. “I won’t say anything, promise. You let me know if he does something stupid. It’s still Josh.” Smiling at her words, she turned and took her seat in the stands, the boys immediately finding their mother and where she was watching from, subtly saying hello. 
The next night, Josh laid next to you in bed, a sheepish look plastered on his face. “I did something bad.” Your deadpanned expression told him you weren’t amused with whatever he was about to say. 
“I told my mom about us. She said she already knew, I swear I don’t know how, but yeah. She’s the only one. Scouts honor,” he held the signal up as he spoke, clearly worried about your reaction. Sitting up in the bed and coming face to face with him you smiled. “Your mom told me last night at the show she knew. Something about how you looked at me,” his soft smile had his dimples on display.
Nodding at your words, he cleared his throat, taking in a breath. “Yeah, well I don’t know what look she’s talking about. I promise though, no one else knows.” Leaning down and chastly kissing you, you pulled back and spoke. 
“Good. The whole secret relationship thing is such a turn on.” He mumbled against your lips as he spoke again. “I am so glad to hear you say that because I have a few games I want to play with you.”
Pulling back, your eyebrows shot up your face. “Games?” He nodded, looking at you like you were crazy for not already knowing what he was talking about. “Sexy chicken, vibrator controlled by the phone remote-” pushing his face away with a laugh, he giggled, hair a poofy mess as he fell back down to you.
“Joking, joking. I wouldn’t want my goody two shoes to get in trouble. Oh, I figured out your favorite color by the way." You rolled your eyes at his enthusiastic tone.
Patting his lips, a shit eating grin took over his face. "You know what they say about a mans lip color, right?" This was going to be a blast. 
451 notes · View notes
pennylanefics · 1 year
Text
Little Bird - Dad!Josh Kiszka
a/n: i haven't written in a while, so please excuse that. but i listened to the new jonas brothers album and this song instantly gave me dad!josh vibes and i ran with it
what was supposed to be a small blurb turned into a six page fic that i found myself tearing up writing :) enjoy &lt;3
summary: josh finds himself getting insecure and emotional late at night with your daughter
word count: ~ 1.6k
warnings: mentions of c-section/birth, no details, mentions of scars
*edit is by @/voidedbxtch on instagram*
Tumblr media Tumblr media
You were fast asleep in the comfort of your bed, the only noise being the sound of crashing waves playing from your TV, an ambience that you’ve found comforting. However, the absence of your boyfriend next to you was enough to wake you up.
Josh was nowhere to be seen. your hand runs over his spot on the bed, which was cold, meaning he had been gone for quite some time. Glancing over at your alarm clock, bright red letters tell you the time. 2:24 AM.
Carefully, you rise out of bed, still sore from birth, even though it’s been close to five weeks at this point, sliding your slippers on and grabbing a discarded t-shirt of Josh’s that laid on the end of the bed.
As you pad down the hall, you hear a faint voice coming from the nursery. Slowly, you approach the slightly cracked door and peer inside.
Josh sits in the rocking chair, gently rocking back and forth, having foregone a shirt, your daughter, Wren, laying against his bare chest, her hand perched in a fist against his collarbone. Josh’s hair was disheveled, unkempt as the journey of parenthood had overtaken him.
“My little bird,” he whispers to her, leaning in to place the softest and lightest kiss to her nose. She squirms in his arms and settles back down, a small smile on her face as she listens to her dad’s voice. “You are so beautiful, my angel.”
You had never heard him speak this low yet still be filled with so much love and adoration before. It melts your heart as you step just a bit closer, not wanting to tap the door to give your eavesdropping away.
“You have your mama’s kind eyes, don’t you?” He teases, bringing a finger up to trace around her features. Her big, brown eyes focused on the object in front of her, hypnotized in a way. You could tell, in the short few weeks that she has been here, that she’s a full blown daddy’s girl.
She’s got him wrapped around her finger, just as her tiny hand wraps around his. He grins and you could’ve sworn a tear fell from his eye just as she did that; even though she’s done it many times already, each time, it makes him swoon.
“Listen,” he starts, keeping his tone low still, “I know I may not be the best dad, but I am going to try my hardest. You are my world, next to your mama, of course. I know one day I won’t be here to care for you, and I have to accept that. But I know you’re going to find someone so special to take care of you.”
He pauses his little speech to wipe away a tear that had fallen down his cheek. He began to slowly rock again, wanting to soothe and calm her to try and get her to lay down for the night again.
“And I know you’re going to find that person, and I just hope that you know, when that day comes, and you spread your little wings and fly to someone else’s arms, that you know I loved you from the moment you came into this world, to the moment that I leave it. You hear me, little bird?”
Wren gurgles in response and Josh can’t help the watery chuckle that escapes him. He was beyond emotional, way too much for how late it was, but he couldn’t help it. He never expected to be in this position, caring for his daughter, a new light in his life, a new reason to live.
Softly, he starts to hum Annie’s Song to her, eliciting a yawn from her tiny mouth. His hand gently strokes along her back, your eyes finally adjusting enough to see that she was just in her diaper; Josh’s favorite thing ever was skin to skin, so it was no surprise that he had taken the bonding exercise up with her.
It reminded you of when you first came home from the hospital. Josh put everything away that was in your hospital bag, allowing you to rest, shower, and just come down from the emotions and roller coaster that was labor and childbirth.
You decided to take a shower as soon as you got home, being careful of the stitches you received during your c-section, but still taking the time to wash the feeling off and allowing your muscles to relax under the hot stream of water.
By the time you had gotten ready to crawl into bed, as it was nearing midnight at this point. As you step into your bedroom, you find Josh, laying flat on his back, shirtless, wearing a pair of sweats, with Wren laying on his chest, her onesie being set beside him.
Your heart soars at the sight and you quickly had to take a photo, Josh being asleep making it far too easy. However, you wake him up, needing to put her in her bassinet for the time being; you hated waking him, but you deserved some cuddle time too.
From that moment, skin to skin was his favorite pastime.
“I love you,” he whispers to her, having finally stilled and just about to fall completely asleep. Her eyes were droopy as he continued singing to her, leaning his head back and his own eyes falling closed for a moment.
That’s when you decide to make your presence known. What you didn’t know, though, was how you had your own tears in your eyes, listening to josh describe his love for her and talk about what it’ll be like when he’s no longer here for her.
“What are you doing up, honey?” He asks, instantly growing worried that something was wrong, especially with the tears clouding your eyes that he loves so much.
“I woke up and you weren’t there, so I came looking for you and…” you taper off, not knowing how to explain that you heard everything.
“How much did you hear?” He wonders, knowing that you were listening; he knows you far too well.
“Everything,” you mumble. He smiles and carefully stands up to place Wren in her crib, pausing for a moment to make sure she was okay, before gently, with help from you, slipping her onesie back on.
As soon as everything was secured and she was fast asleep, you pull Josh right into your arms, his face falling in the spot between your neck and shoulder. One of your hands plays with his messy hair while the other runs up and down his back.
“She’s five weeks old, Josh, we have a lifetime with her before she’s out in the world.”
“I know, darling. I just got to thinking how that day is going to come, where she’s not going to need us anymore and our little bird is going be on her own.”
“And that day won’t be for a while. We still have milestone birthdays, walking, starting school, going to daycare, everything.”
“But it’ll be here before we know it.” Sighing softly, you push away from Josh and grab his face in your hands.
“I know it’s tough to think about. I get it. But let’s not think about what the future holds, alright?” Josh takes a deep breath, more tears welling up in his brown eyes.
“W-what if I don’t show her how much I love her?” His voice cracks and in an instant, you are bringing him back into your arms as he cries into your shoulder. “I wanna be a good dad, but I fear that I don’t know how.”
“Hey, shh. It’s not going to be easy sometimes. And that’s okay. We can’t be perfect, but I know for a fact that she will know you love her with your entire heart. You’re already showing her and she can’t even comprehend anything right now. But she senses the love you have and the love you’ve given her so far. The way she smiles when she hears your voice, how she instantly calms down and goes to sleep when you sing John Denver to her. Josh, I have no doubt in my mind that she will forever know how much you love her.”
Silence hangs in the air as Josh takes in your words.
“Thank you,” he whispers, placing a kiss to your exposed neck. “You are incredible, and I don’t know what I’d do without you, love.”
“I love you, Josh. I always will.” There’s another pause before Josh takes your hand and guides you out of the nursery, quietly closing the door and turning back on the monitor he had brought in with him.
Bringing you back to your room, he helps you get settled into bed again, being mindful of your scars and everything. He holds you close and kisses your forehead.
“What do you think she’ll turn out to be like?” He asks, wanting to start another conversation but wanting it to be lighthearted.
“I think she’ll be talented, like you and your brothers. Maybe Jake can show her how to play guitar. No drums, though.” Josh laughs a real, hearty laugh, a sign that his mood was already improving.
“I’d love for her to continue the family tradition, it’d be nice to see.”
“I know she’ll be proud to do so if she decides to.”
Josh curls up into your side and sighs deeply, nuzzling his face into your neck.
“Get some rest, Josh,” you whisper, threading your fingers through his hair. His eyes flutter closed, the crashing waves consuming the both of you, as well as thoughts of your small family, your mind filled with all the facts that prove Josh is, and will continue to be, the best damn dad in the world.
Tumblr media
taglist: @sacredthethread @ourlovegrows @doodle417 @digitalcalamity @rocknrolls-child @fan-girl-97 @writingcold @thecoldwind @allieisacrybaby @jordierama @streamingcolors-gvf @stardustcatcher @stardustchxrds @sacredthefran @gvfungi @joshkiszkastoe
217 notes · View notes
abeautylives · 24 days
Text
Times I Remember Well
(and Some That I Don’t)
Tumblr media
Masterlist
author’s note: I highly recommend reading this story through as a whole 🤍
word count: 20.4k
pairing: it’s a secret, but y’all know me
time frame: 2010-2018
warnings: each part has it’s own warnings, eventual smut
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Thank you bestie boo @samkiszkasfacialhair for everything, love you! 😘
Taglist: @lightmylove-gvf @spicedandicedtea @weneedsomehealing123 @milkgemini @why-ami-on-here @gretavanbitches @twistedmelodies @wildflowerxx-x @dannythedog @blissfulbellss @averagemisfit03 @dharmasdivine @thetroublegetssoloud71 @lucimoo @toxbexannouncedx @dig0930 @maddie-van-fleet @friska101-cg @welllauragvf @gretasimp @objectsinspvce @writingcold @gretavangroupie @sweetybre @gretasgoose @gvfjess @josh-iamyour-mama @literal-dead-leaf @lyndz2names
118 notes · View notes
vanfleeter · 7 months
Text
Meditation Mishaps // JMK
Tumblr media
Characters: Uncle!Josh x Lily
Warnings: Fluff. Language.
Author's Note: Let's all welcome Uncle Joshy to the family reunion, shall we? Also, I don't write Josh often, so bear with me.
Summary: Meditation and babysitting do not go hand-in-hand.
Tumblr media
“Jake, it’s my meditation day today.”
Josh leans against the kitchen counter as he stirs his spoon inside the cup full of tea.
“I know, I know.. But I promised Tommy that I would take him to the soccer game–but Y/N got called into work and I really need a babysitter for Lily.”
Josh can hear screaming and crying in the background of the phone call. Tommy screams because he can’t get his shoe tied and Lily cries for Jake to pick her up.
“In a minute Lilypad..” Jake calmly spoke before raising his voice to Tommy. “Tommy, just wait! Dammit, I’ll help you when I get off the phone with Josh!”
Josh casually sips on his tea as he glances around the kitchen, grateful he’s in the quiet house with no screaming kids.
“Josh, please!” He hears Jake beg. “It won’t be for long, I promise, three or four hours.”
Josh sighs. “Yeah, sure. Bring her over.”
Jake hisses as he mutters curse words under his breath. “That’s my hair Lily!”
“Maybe I can use my meditation to calm her little butt down.” Josh snickers.
“Good luck with that..” Jake grumbles. “DAMMIT! THOMAS DO THAT ONE MORE TIME AND WE AREN’T GOING!” Josh holds the phone away from his ear as Jake’s voice carries. “But Josh, I really fucking appreciate this. I owe you big time.”
“Mmmm, yes you do.” Josh chuckles. “I’ll see you soon.” He adds before hanging up the call.
-
Hearing the doorbell ringing, Josh yanks open the front door and greets the three of them with a wide grin. “Uncle Joshy!” Tommy exclaims as he hugs Josh’s legs.
“Hey little man,” Josh laughs. “Excited for the game?”
Tommy eagerly nods his head. “It’s going to be so much fun!”
Lily whines and tries to wriggle herself out of Jake’s arm. She pushes her body off of his chest and he huffs. “Alright, alright. Driving me up a wall today.” He says as he sets her down on the ground. She tottles over to Josh and he scoops her up.
“Do you and I get to spend some time together?” He says as he tickles her. She giggles and buries her face into his shoulder.
“It is almost her nap time anyways, so you might be able to get her meditation in while she sleeps.” Jake says as he hands off her diaper bag and blanket. “And again, I really appreciate you doing this.”
Josh hums and nods his head as he wraps his hand around the edge of the front door and starts walking them out of the house. “Don’t forget that you owe me.” He says before sending them off and shutting the door. He huffs and looks at Lily. “Have you ever meditated?”
Bringing Lily into his meditation room, he sets her down on his mat while he rolls out another one. He sits down on the floor and crosses his legs in front of him and repositions Lily’s legs. “Okay.. Deep breaths, yeah?” He says, demonstrating to her how to breathe in deeply and to breathe out. She watches as he does it again a couple more times before trying it herself. “There you go.” He says. “Now close your eyes when you do that.”
He closes his eyes and begins his deep breathing again. Lily doesn’t close her eyes, instead she watches Josh as he does his deep breathing. She breathes in deeply when he does and releases her breath a few seconds later. She can hear him humming as he breathes out. It sounds like he’s singing and she loves it when he sings.
A smile spreads across her face and she breathes in again only to hum as she breathes back out. She giggles and does it again. Breathe in. Breathe out and make noise.
Lily giggles again. This time catching Josh’s attention. He peeks out through one eye to see her mocking his pose and giggling. He breathes in again, his one eye still trained on her. They both hum as they breathe out and Lily breaks out in giggles again.
Josh chuckles and opens his other eye. She falls backwards as she laughs, her head landing with a thud on the hardwood floor. He grimaces and watches her carefully as she pauses her movements and ponders what happened before she breaks out into another fit of giggles. Her eyes scan the room and stop. She stops giggling and flips over onto her hands and knees before pushing herself up to her feet.
He watches as she tottles across the room, his eyebrows knitting together as he follows her movements through the room. When he sees where she’s heading, his smile drops and he springs to his feet. He sprints across the room and swipes her up from the floor.
“Oh no you don’t.” He says as she laughs in his ear. “Fire, bad.” He says, shaking his head. She frowns and huffs. He brings her back to the rugs and sets her down. “Now.. Let’s meditate.” He watches as she crawls towards his lap and nestles herself inside the space. He looks down at her with his eyebrows raised. She yawns and rests her head on his knee. He shrugs his shoulders and closes his eyes before picking up where he left off on his breathing.
He was brought out of his trance some time later to his beaded necklace being tugged on. Peaking one eye open again, he glances down to his lap to see Lily yanking on the beads and twisting them within her fingers. One harsh tug broke the thread sending the beads scattering across the floor.
“Did you have a good nap?” She smiles up at him before twisting her body and climbing off of his lap. She pads around the room and picks individual beads before coming back over to him and dropping them into his hands. “Oh.. Well thank you.” She nods her head and goes back to collecting the rest of the beads.
After three or four more trips, back and forth, he has all the beads in his hands that he has cupped and held out for her to drop them into. He chuckles and goes to move to stand up when she gasps and runs as quickly as she can to the table by the window. The one that his bonsai tree rests upon. She crawls beneath the legs of the table for a few seconds and reemerges holding a bead pinched between her fingers.
She tries reaching for the table to pull herself up to her feet but instead she only pulls the table, sending it toppling over. Josh sighs, closing his eyes as if in defeat. The pot breaks upon contact with the floor spilling the dirt and the tree on the floor.
“Awesome..”
Carefully standing to his feet, he goes over to the trash can by the door and dumps the beads inside before going over to the new mess that has occurred.
“I think it’s time we stop trying to meditate…” He says as he scoops up the toddler and carries her out of the room.
Going downstairs he hears the doorbell ring and he quickly snatches it open to reveal Jake standing on the porch. Josh didn’t realize he had breathed a sigh of relief until he saw Jake chuckling.
“Dada!”
Jake reaches for Lily and she buries her face into his neck. “She’s a handful isn’t she?” He says.
“She wasn’t until a few minutes ago.” Josh says as he picks up her diaper bag and blanket and hands the items back to Jake. “Broke my necklace–but she did clean them all up, before knocking over my bonsai tree.”
“Did you make a mess in Uncle Joshy’s house?” Jake says as he tickles Lily’s side making her laugh.
“On the bright side, I did get the majority of my meditation in.” Josh says with a shrug of his shoulders. “She basically slept on my lap the whole time.”
Lily breathes in deeply before releasing it and humming. She giggles, making Jake laugh.
“I see you taught her a few things.”
Josh chuckles and shakes her head. “She’s too happy to be serious.” He says.
“Well thanks again for watching her,” Jake says. “I really appreciate it.”
“What are uncles for?” Josh winks at Lily. “Oh! So about you owing me.. I think I know what you can do.”
Jake huffs. “I will buy you a new pot for your tree.”
“And replant it?”
Jake’s shoulders slump. “Fine… I’ll see you..”
_____________________________________________________
65 notes · View notes