#I didn’t know if this or everything after chapter 46 was supposed to be the next what but the first what is drawn so short I feel its this | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

geminiamethyst · 11 months

Text

Running. Chapter 45: Haunted

Chapter 1: click HERE

Chapter 44: click HERE

Chapter 46

Okay. I’m back with this story. Sorry it took a while XD

No one knew exactly how to feel after that fight. Could that even be called a fight? It seemed more like manslaughter or an execution with how it had ended.

No matter how you looked at it, it was still brutal to process. What was left of the saw mill was abandoned once again. No one cared that it was still covered in ice. They just took the body of the man with them, wrapping him up in one of their sleeping bags, and left. They travelled as far as they could go with how fast the sun was setting. They stopped at a good enough place for a break and it felt like reality had sunk back in again. Kaito was sitting down to give his leg a break. He didn’t know why it was playing up again but he can have a look later on. Maki had sat Taka down after picking up two thick, strong sticks that ran the length of Taka’s forearm. Maki had taken out the left over bandages and was ready to set to painful and impromptu medical attention. Mondo had remained silent and went off somewhere. He seemed to be affected by this the most. In all the time that he had gotten to know him, Kaito had never seen him so quiet. It took about a minute to realise that the biker had taken the body and a small shovel that he had with him. It didn’t take a genius to work out what Mondo was doing. And no one had thought to stop him.

While everything was going on, Kaito had started to think. He couldn't get those words out of his head. “Get…girl…shi…North….” was what the man had said before he drew his last breath. He didn't have enough strength to say a full sentence, but Kaito could piece together just enough. “Get” and “girl”. The man probably tried to say “Get the girl…” first. Girl? Was he talking about Maki? Quite possibly considering how she was the only girl in the group. Not to mention, the man probably knew how much danger she was in with Orochi and past the mind control, wanted nothing more than to help to protect her too. And he also said “North” at the end. They were heading north anyway. So did this man know about the camp too? But how could he? He had been in the Underground for who knows how long. Unless he came from there? And what was “shi” supposed to mean? This is so confusing.

“I suggest that you bite down on this. Hard.” Maki advised, holding the towel up to Taka's face. He hesitated a little, but knowing about what's coming next, he did as he was told. Kaito was snapped out of his thoughts as he noticed what was happening between the two. Maki waited until Taka gave her a nod, showing that he was ready. She glanced down at his arm, clearly seeing where the bone was snapped. She focused hard and there was a loud crunch in the air. Taka screamed as he could feel the bones in his arm being forced back into place. His voice was muffled by the towel clenched between his teeth, the only thing keeping him from accidentally biting his tongue. Kaito flinched as he heard the bones move and winced as Taka screamed. Taka breathed heavily when Maki started to make a splint. Maki didn't seem fazed. Using her powers, she pressed the sticks in place on Taka's arm and wrapped everything up in the bandages that they still had. Continuing to use her powers, Maki also kept the arm at an angle as a long strip of bandages held the arm in place, tying at the back of Taka's neck. A makeshift cast and sling. Small but effective for now. Hopefully maybe there will be someone at the camp that can do a better job.

“Kaito, I hate to ask but could you check on Mondo?” Taka asked after having taken out the towel from his mouth. He glanced in the direction from where Mondo had disappeared to. “He’s been at it for a while.”

Kaito followed his gaze before glancing down at his watch. He suppressed a flinch as he saw a small crack in the glass, but it was still working just fine. He didn’t realise how long Mondo had been gone for.

“Sure. I was just thinking that actually.” Kaito smiled a little before he walked over to where Mondo was most likely. It took about two minutes but he found the biker. Mondo was kneeling down by a mound of earth that was piled up. He was slouched over and looked like he was taking a small break from his self appointed job. He was also rubbing his hands, trying to soothe the blisters that he’s probably got while he was digging. The shovel was laying beside him. The corpse of the man was still wrapped up in the sleeping bag.

“Hey.” Kaito gently spoke, being just as slow in approaching the biker. He didn’t know what Mondo’s current thought process was, but he didn’t want to accidentally spook him.

“Dug as best I could. Guy deserves a proper burial.” Mondo responded, his tone making him sound like an monotone answering machine. Kaito found himself biting his lip as he tried to not look at the wrapped up body. Mondo wasn’t wrong, but what else they could do? This was the only way that they can try to be respectful to the unknown man. He didn’t even give a name and it wasn’t like they could contact any of his relatives, they don’t have the means to. This was the next best thing. Still not ideal though.

“How’s Taka?” Mondo suddenly asked, standing up and dusting his hands off.

“Maki Roll is patching up his arm. He’ll be okay.” Kaito said, trying suppress a shudder as he remembered the sound of Taka’s arm being forced back into the right position. “How you holding up?”

“Don’t wanna talk about it, kid.” Mondo sighed, his head bowed down so that he couldn’t make eye contact. Kaito felt like, something cut inside him when he saw this. Mondo had never been like this before. He honestly didn’t know what to do or how to approach the situation. It was new territory to him. He knew that Mondo felt immense guilt for what had happened. He needs to let the biker know that it wasn’t his fault. It was Orochi’s for trapping a Limitless in that snake form for who knows how long.

“It wasn’t your fault. None of us knew.” Kaito tried to start off, not sure if he should approach the biker or not.

“Still used my powers to kill him. That ain’t gonna change.” Mondo sighed heavily, looking down at his hands. He then glared at them, as if he wished that his powers had never existed at all. He really was beating himself up over this badly.

“All the same, Orochi knew.” Kaito tried again to reason. He then felt bitter as he suddenly remembered how they found Tanken’s body and how Maki theorised that the other members of the Council had met the same fate. “A part of me wonders if he intended to kill him after all of this was over.”

“I really hope that ain’t the fucking case, kid.” Mondo muttered, looking back into the pit that he had dug. He sighed a little before approaching the body. He then glanced up at Kaito. “Mind giving me a hand?”

Kaito tried not to shudder. He knew what Mondo wanted to do. He started to walk over when the body suddenly lifted itself into the air. Kaito almost screamed as his fear of ghosts was the first thing that came to mind. Then he whipped around and spotted Maki with Taka standing behind her. Her gaze was focused on the body as Mondo and Kaito took a few steps back from it. It was delicately placed in the pit and the pile of earth was just as carefully placed on top of it. All four Limitless stood by the make shift grave, silence taking over the forest. They didn’t know the man, but someone must have. And they’ll probably never know what had happened to him. Despite all that, each Limitless still felt grief for him and were wishing him well in the next life. It felt like it was something that they had to do.

“What did he say to you?” Maki suddenly asked, the silence finally breaking. She was looking up at Kaito, her eyes caught between focused and misty. Kaito felt uncomfortable as the other two looked to him as well. He was still trying to figure out those words, but he might as well share what he knows.

“He said thank you for freeing him.” He spoke, his voice breaking a little. He cleared his throat, trying to keep himself steady. “But there was something else.”

“What’s that?” Taka asked, becoming more concerned with this information.

“He said-“ Kaito started, but Maki suddenly cut him off.

“Do you hear that?” She hissed, her voice low and sharp. Silence overcame the group. Or so it seemed. Maki’s ears were sharper than the others. Something that she’s partly thankful for back when she was trained as an assassin. She could hear fast feet and the rustling of leaves. She could even hear some growling. The guys didn’t until it was too late. There was a flash of fur as the group was suddenly surrounded by wolves. They were forced to stand back to back as the pack closed in on them in a small circle. They growled aggressively as their eyes were pinpointed right on each Limitless.

“Down! Sit!” Mondo yelled as a wolf took a lunge towards him. He lit his hand up as a warning, causing the aggressive animal to back away. It worked for now, but most likely not for long. Maki was about to push the wolves away when something else suddenly came to her ears. This time it sounded louder, and larger. It was almost like a bull charging. The earth shook a little when something suddenly landed a couple of metres away from the group. No, someone. A large figure that was on all fours. They seemed to be a man at first glance. The group watched as the wolves suddenly turned their attention to this figure. They growled and snapped at him, but the man growled back. One even tried to lunge at him, but he pushed it back. It yelped a little, but didn’t seem injured, more like in shock. The man continued to growl as if he were talking to them. The wolves suddenly stopped growling and slowly turned away. They were barking as they ran off into the forest, disappearing into the dense greenery.

The man huffed a little as he stood up straight at last. He turned around to face the group, just as Mondo extinguished the flame circling his fist. The man before them was incredibly tall and muscular. He wore pants that were torn a little, but didn’t have shoes. His shirt looked like he was literally growing out of it and it was ready to burst off of him. He wore a pair of glasses that were impressively well taking care of. His hair was dark green and was long and tangled as if he had never brushed it before in his life.

“Gonta!” Kaito exclaimed as he recognised the giant. Gonta squinted a little. Did he need new glasses? His face then lit up like a Christmas tree as he recognised two of the four Limitless.

“Kaito! Maki! Gonta so happy to you again!” He cried out, sweeping the said Limitless into a tight hug.

“Too tight, Gonta! Too tight!” Kaito wheezed as he felt all the air being pushed out of him. Maki seemed to be in a similar position.

“Sorry!” Gonta shouted, carefully letting the young couple go. He quickly looked over them to see if they were injured by him accidentally. Thankfully nothing was too serious. Then Gonta suddenly became confused as his mind processed what had just happened. “What you doing here?”

#running fic #limitless sequel #Kaimaki #ishimondo #kaito momota #maki haruwaka #Kiyotaka Ishimaru #mondo owada #drv3 #DR #super power au #gonta gokuhara

6 notes · View notes

ticklishshenanigansau · 1 year

Text

Ticklish Shenanigans - Chapter 46

What Does the HUD Say About His Dating Power Level?

Mod Yosh ~ Denise, *Papyrus Mod Kitty ~ Harpy, Vulkin (*Mod Kitty had played as this character for part of the RP version of this chapter.)

Denise smiled down lovingly at her little sister as she began to breathe deeper. The young girl must have been tired from the day’s activities if she had fallen asleep this early. With a soft chuckle, she bent down and smooched Frisk’s forehead. “Love you, sis….” she whispered, her heart warming instantly at the subtle rise of the corners of the child’s mouth.

Slipping out of the room quietly and slowly closing the door behind her, Denise hummed softly to herself as she walked down the hall towards her shared room with Papyrus. She began to feel giddy the moment a thought passed through her mind: this would be the first night she’d be sleeping with her new boyfriend. Honestly, she still couldn’t believe it. The moment she met the two skeleton brothers, Papyrus had fallen head over heels for her. In retrospect, with his staring and blushing, it was quite obvious. Even though she had gravitated towards Sans in the beginning, she was so very glad to have Papyrus instead.

Honestly, though…. What had the younger skeleton seen in her that night? They had barely known each other, aside from Papyrus’ online status as monsterkind’s mascot; Papyrus had no idea who she had been at all, not even that she was Frisk’s older sister! So then, why had he felt so attracted to her from the very beginning? It’s not like she was as confident or attractive as he was….

Denise shook her head with a frustrated huff. There went her thoughts again, trying to convince her she was lesser than she actually was. But she was lesser than him. Only because no one was as great as the Great Papyrus himself. Are you sure you wanna stick with that answer, or do you wanna try something more truthful? No! She was just fine the way she was. Yeah, your foster parents and ‘best friend’ sure thought so too. Shut up!

Distracted by the negative thoughts trying to claim back her conscience, the young woman forgot to take into account the sleeping skeleton inside when she rather forcefully opened the door. Looking up from the floor to the bed, she was surprised to find Papyrus not snuggled up under the covers, but sitting at the foot of the bed reading a book. “You’re still awake?”

Papyrus jolted, looking up quickly at Denise, who in turn took a startled step back. It seemed he had been so engrossed in his read that he hadn’t even heard her barge in. The monster’s shoulders slackened from their tense position with a soft sigh. “I couldn’t sleep. Well, I mean, I COULD, but then Angel needed to be let out to use the litter box, and I hadn’t been able to settle back in since.”

“Is something troubling you?” Denise asked softly, closing the door behind her and walking over to sit on the bed next to her boyfriend. She didn’t like how … un-Papyrus he seemed to be. Stars above, was he unhappy because of her? Was he regretting asking her to be his girlfriend?

“Well … I suppose I would be lying if I said no,” Papyrus answered after a few seconds of hesitation. He slipped a bone-shaped bookmark between the pages and set the closed book down next to him to give Denise his full attention, even though he had yet to look back up at her. “It’s just … with everything happening today. With Dad, and Angel getting hurt. Sans is really stressed out too, and I certainly don’t blame him. And then I learn that the entity who had harmed my pet may very well have been the first fallen human. Not to mention my allergic reaction to Lady Toriel's cooking. Today was just … not the greatest.”

Denise frowned, scooching a touch closer to the monster. “I was really worried today too. I still can’t believe everything that’s happened with Angel and your father. But I know that things will get better. Chris, as psychotic as he was, helped Angel quite a bit, and between him and Ms. Toriel’s healing magic, I’m certain she’ll make a full recovery. As far as your dad goes, I … I’m sure you and your brother will find some way to save him from … wherever he is.” She glanced down at her own lap, her negative thoughts beginning to return. “Um…. I-Is there anything else that made you so upset today?”

“Like what?” Papyrus finally looked up at her.

“I dunno, like….” She twiddled her thumbs in her lap. “Like … something relating to me?”

The monster beside her remained silent for a few moments before finally speaking. “Well, I suppose there is ONE thing.”

Denise’s breath hitched. She could feel the tears already building up, subtly gritting her teeth at the sharp sting behind her eyes. He really had regretted asking her out, hadn’t he? She should’ve known this thing between them would never last….

“I have NO idea how to open up the Dating HUD!”

Denise looked up at him in an instant, eyes wide and confused. “Uhh…. what?”

“Lookie here!” Papyrus grabbed the book and opened it up to the first chapter, pointing at the first of many steps listed on the page. “It says to press [C] for the Dating HUD, but I don’t even know what that MEANS! Frisk had somehow managed to do so during our date back in Snowdin, but I don’t know how she did it. And it’s too late in the evening to ask her!”

“What … even is that?” Denise questioned, staring at the book in bemusement.

“I DON’T KNOW!” The skeleton’s yell startled the human, his flailing arms nearly knocking her off the bed. “But I HAVE to figure this out before I can move on to Step Two!”

“And what’s Step T--?” Denise’s eyes widened, drawing in a short breath of surprise. She stared down at the text, rereading it again and again, making sure her eyes weren’t playing any tricks on her. At last, her brain finally registered what it read.

‘Step Two: Ask them on a date.’

Papyrus was … going to ask her on a date? But, wasn’t he planning on breaking up with her? Why would he be reading a dating manual if he was going to cut ties with her? Was it just the first book he had picked up? Or was it some sort of cruel prank he had cooked up for her?

“Denise?” Papyrus’ voice startled her out of her thoughts. She looked up at him, finding him staring back with a concerned look on his bony face. “I had asked if you wanted to read the rulebook so you didn’t have to hunch over like that. Are you okay?”

“O-Oh, uh, yeah, I’m fine,” she lied, sitting back up straight and brushing her fingers through her hair, trying to distract herself from the shame swelling up within her. She was so awkward. No wonder nobody liked her.

“Are you sure? You’re acting a little off tonight. Do you need some water?”

“N-No, I’m okay. Really, I am.”

“You know you can tell me, right? Do not be fooled, for I in fact DO have ears, even if I cannot dab anything behind them!”

“I-I’m okay, Papyrus.”

“Perhaps if you talked about it, it would help you feel be--”

“Just stop!” Denise shut her eyes tightly, squeezing tears free, feeling them drip onto her tightened fists in her lap. She could feel Papyrus stiffen up next to her, clearly taken aback by her sudden outburst. Honestly, she hadn’t meant to shout -- and she certainly hoped she hadn’t woken up Frisk in the other room -- but the voices were just getting louder and louder and she needed them to stop. “Please…. Just stop. Stop … this. Stop … pretending you care. Nobody cares. My foster parents didn’t care, my friends didn’t care, my ex didn’t care…. No one cares about me. So why should you?”

“Denise?...” Papyrus tried to speak up, but she interrupted him with her continued tangent. With the floodgates open, it was impossible to force it back closed.

“Why should you c-care about me? I’m nothing special. I c-can’t do anything right. I’ve been kicked out of homes, tossed around like I was nothing…. I-I’m not supposed to be someone you care about. Not you, not Sans, not Frisk, not anyone. My own parents didn’t love me enough to help me when I needed financial support. I had no choice but to steal money from them, just so I could afford a crappy motel room for a night. Helen would always boss me around, I doubt she even cares about me. She just needed a housemaid she didn’t have to pay. Chris didn’t love me, either; he just loved having a girlfriend. I was nothing but a trophy for him to show off to his friends.”

“So then … why?” Denise was full-on crying now, her shoulders quivering as she struggled to choke back louder sobs threatening to break free. “After everything they’ve done to me … after everything they’ve said to me … why are you still putting up with me? Don’t you have anything better to do?”

She stared down at her lap through squinted eyes, tears swimming around and blurring her vision in green. Suddenly, a splash of red appeared, and she felt a gloved hand pressing gently up against her chin. She let her head be maneuvered until she was looking into Papyrus’ eye lights. She could just barely see little dots of orange lining the rims of his sockets.

“Denise, don’t SAY things like that!” he implored. “I do not know the full extent of all the misdeeds the others may have committed, but I assure you they are WRONG. Everyone is worthy of love and friendship, ESPECIALLY you.” An orange tear streaked down his cheekbone. “These humans who were supposed to care for you…. They must have hurt you GRAVELY to make you believe that anything they said to you holds any truth. Please listen to me when I tell you NONE of it is true. Do you know why I had been so helplessly enamored by your presence the night we met?”

He waited for Denise to respond, and when she shook her head, he continued. “It is because I could sense the kind of person you are in your SOUL. No, I did not perform a nonconsensual CHECK on you, that would’ve been rude! To a monster, a human SOUL is arguably the most powerful source imaginable, their traits and innermost emotions very palpable. I could sense your sadness, your self-doubt … but deep down I could also sense a truly kind and beautiful person. Yes, I have met many humans with kindness in their SOULs, but you are the first I’ve met who has KINDNESS. It’s one of the seven different SOUL traits unique to humans, and it so happens to be my favorite of the traits. You can do SO MUCH GOOD for humans and monsters alike, but only once you have learned to love yourself as much as I do will you be able to unlock your full potential. That is why I care about you, and that is why I will NEVER leave you.”

Denise was at a loss for words. All she could hope to do in that moment was stare at the monster she hopelessly fell for. He meant every word he said, she knew it. So then … why was she having such a hard time accepting it? Why did knowing that someone genuinely caring about her shock her into such a standstill?

A few moments passed before Papyrus broke his gaze away from hers to look down at the dating manual beside them. He picked it up, studying it as if trying to make a decision. Then, he tossed the book over his shoulder, letting it land open and face-down on the floor.

"Let's go somewhere," Papyrus suggested out of nowhere. He gently took both of Denise's hands into his own, standing up and helping her up to her feet as well. "Let's forget all about the rules for a little while and just … do whatever we want."

Denise blinked in surprise. This was all happening so quickly. She could hardly process what was going on anymore. "I-I, um…."

Smiling kindly at Denise's hesitation, Papyrus' face suddenly lit up with an idea. "All right, here is what we shall do!" Letting go of her hands, he rushed to his closet, rummaging through it until he came back out with an empty shoebox. All the while, the young woman watched in confusion and interest.

Setting it down on the bed and lifting the top off, the skeleton placed his hands on the crown of Denise's head, sockets squinting in concentration. After a few moments of dramatic grunting, he suddenly wrenched his hands away, wrestling with something invisible before shoving it into the box. After slapping the lid back on top, he threw the box like a football back into the closet and shut the door. "THERE! I have taken away your dark and discouraging thoughts! Let's escape before they find their way back to you, hmm?" He held out his hand invitingly to his date.

Denise watched the skeleton’s antics in confusion all the way up until he held his hand out to her, in which her face lit up in realization. As if Papyrus’ silly motions of ridding her of her dark thoughts had actually worked, Denise smiled softly with a blush. “Okay…~” she meekly agreed, taking his offered hand into her own. She squeaked in surprise at Papyrus’ sudden burst of happy laughter, pulling her up onto her feet and up against his chest. She blushed harder.

“Then off we go!” With a snap of his fingers, Papyrus engulfed Denise’s SOUL with gravity magic, pulling her safely a couple inches off the ground behind him as he flew down the stairs. Once outside, he settled her down onto the porch and kicked closed the front door. “Let’s go to the city! It always looked so cool when I was–!” His sockets flew wide open for a split second before he cleared his throat and corrected himself loudly, “FROM A DISTANCE AT NIGHT!”

The odd behavior hadn’t gone unnoticed by Denise, but decided not to worry about it, doing her best to uphold her promise. “O-Okay, then. Heheh, lead the way, Papyrus.”

“Great! I know of a shortcut!” Papyrus swiftly hoisted Denise up into his arms princess-style, beginning a brisk jog. “I hope you don’t mind me carrying you! I certainly don’t mind….” A soft orange tinge colored Papyrus’ cheeks, though he didn’t avert his gaze.

The human looked back up at Papyrus, mouth slightly gaped in awe, impressed by his physical capability of carrying her with such ease. Her blush deepened. “I don’t mind, either. It’s very nice.~” She laid her head on his shoulder, enjoying the ride, gazing adoringly up at the chivalrous skeleton. She couldn’t help a soft giggle each time she caught his eye lights drifting back down at her instead of focusing on where he was going.

“Ahem!...” Papyrus suddenly cleared his throat, seeming to finally register that his secret glances down at his date were not so secret after all. “I’ve been meaning to ask: I always see you wearing your green headband – just like how I always wear my scarf! Does it hold some significant memories for you, Denise?”

Not quite prepared for such a personal question, Denise found a hand sliding up to her head, fingers gently clutching the beloved accessory. She smiled sadly. “Yeah… My mom gave it to me for my sixteenth birthday. I’ve always treasured it, even before their passing, but … nowadays I can’t seem to go a day without wearing it, whether it goes with my outfit or not. Though, I usually make sure it goes with my outfit.” She chuckled softly despite herself.

“I understand how very special it is to you, Denise,” Papyrus said, expression softening. “As a matter of fact, I also received this scarf as a token from my mother! Er, well, I’m sure it is! …Even though I can’t remember much, and Sans’ memories are repressed … I can just feel it in my bones! Nyeheheh!~”

“Oh, Pap,” Denise softly empathized. “I’m sorry you can’t remember much about your parents. But … I know that they would both be very proud of the amazing skeleton you’ve become, just as I know Sans is.” She briefly nuzzled her nose against her date’s neck, drawing out an adorable giggle from him.

Papyrus only just started to become slightly winded from the consistent jog as he passed into the city limits, and he began to slow his pace. “Look, look! We’ve made it!” he exclaimed, setting the human down on the sidewalk. No longer focused on any set direction, he allowed himself to be attracted to the bright lights all around them.

Looking up and around at her familiar radiant surroundings, Denise felt the corners of her lips tug upward more and more until she was beaming. “Oh, wow…. I’ve seen the city at night before, but it’s never looked this beautiful.”

“Isn’t it amazing!” Papyrus exclaimed excitedly, grinning down at Denise, seeming to enjoy the look on her face just as much as the beautiful scenery. “I’ve always liked cities! They chase away the dark! OHH!” Face suddenly brightening in excitement, he rushed over to a clothing shop store front, where a handful of mannequins stood in various poses, each wearing a rather fetching style. He stopped in front of a breezy summer outfit, pale yellow in color. “Wouldn’t I look great in that?” He suddenly struck a pose in front of the window, imitating the mannequin, grin widening. “You choose one too! Go on!”

Following close behind the eccentric monster, Denise focused her gaze on the mirror separating her date from the mannequin. She was able to make out his reflection layered over the mannequin’s, looking like Papyrus himself was wearing the outfit. She giggled. “Heehee! It does look good on you. But then again, you look good in anything.”

Browsing the other displays, her eyes locked on a particularly cute buttoned sky-blue blouse and wavy ocean-blue skirt. “Oh, wow, look at how cute!” she gushed. Looking over at Papyrus, then back at the display, she hesitated before attempting to copy the pose as well. She grinned at her reflection wearing the outfit.

Papyrus’ sockets fell closed in self-satisfaction. “Of course I do! For I am the GREAT and FASHIONABLE Papyrus!” When he opened his eyes, he appeared delighted to find his date following suit, glancing at her reflection. “Oh, that’s a MARVELOUS choice! It would go so well with your beautiful–... Nnnhh!~” Papyrus’ hand crept up towards his scarf and lightly fiddled near his neck, blushing profusely. “...B-Beautiful eyes, nyeheh…~ …W-Would you like to see if there are any street vendors out this late? I’m a bit peckish after jogging all that way.”

Not expecting such a sweet compliment, Denise’s cheeks erupted in a blush, shyly swirling a finger through a lock of hair that had escaped her ponytail. “Th-Thank you…~” Her stomach suddenly rumbled at the mention of food, and she smiled up at Papyrus. “Sure, that sounds great. Lead the way, Papyrus.”

“All righty!” Marching ahead with purpose, Papyrus started to sing under his breath. He didn’t mind any of the staring stragglers they passed – in fact not greeting anyone as he normally might have, too preoccupied with stealing glances at his date. He suddenly jabbed a finger outward towards a small stand with two figures standing behind it. “Oh, hey! See that glow over there? I think that food cart is run by monsters!”

The skeleton dashed over to the food cart, grinning warmly at the pair of smaller monsters: a Vulkin bubbling with lava and a green, wingless Harpy. “HELLO, FELLOW MONSTERS! Are you still open?”

“Oh, hello!” Harpy greeted, levitating with magic. “Yes, we are. Would you like some kebabs?” The monster picked up two skewers in either talon, which were already lined with raw cubes of beef and vegetables.

“Ahh! Helping customers! My favorite!” Vulkin squeaked happily, giving a small bounce, making sure the lava didn’t splash out towards the food or customers.

“Yes, please! One for each of us.” Papyrus reached into his back pocket and fished out his wallet, clicking it open.

Harpy laid the loaded skewers over Vulkin’s open back, then turned back to face the skeleton. “Say, I don’t know if you’d know him, but there was another skeleton back Underground who ran a hot dog stand–”

“Toasty and tasty!!” Vulkin piped up.

“–It was always fun when he came around. He probably doesn’t know it, but he inspired us to open our own stand here.”

“Oh, that would be my brother, Sans.” Papyrus placed the appropriate amount of Gold down, looking a little thoughtful. “Yes, I’m glad his irresponsibility as a sentry did some good….”

With a trill of a surprised giggle, Harpy grabbed the now well-done kebabs, holding one out for each of the customers. “Tonight’s a good night. Enjoy it!”

“Thank you! You as well!”

All the while, Denise smiled to herself. She always found her spirits lifting whenever in the presence of a monster, especially a happy and successful one. The cart vendors sounded overjoyed to be conversing with their fellow monster, just as Papyrus seemed to be, reinstating in Denise once again how lucky the Surface world is to have such friendly creatures back in human society.

Smiling widely, the human carefully took the skewer offered to her, taking care not to singe her fingers on the still-sizzling cubes. “Thank you very much.” She took a bite out of one of the meat tidbits, a satisfied hum drawing out for a few seconds. “Oh, this is really good! Mmm, the smokiness of the open flames just brings out the flavor.”

“Aah! So happy!~” Vulkin beamed with another small hop, while Harpy’s smile grew ever wider.

The two companions waved farewell to the monster vendors before starting a slow walk down the sidewalk, taking in their sights as they ate. “Mm! It really is tasty!” Papyrus agreed, before adding a bit begrudgingly, “Even if it IS a Hotland specialty…. Oh, I’m sorry, Denise, it’s not something I normally think about, but are you comfortable in the evening air? I understand humans are a bit more susceptible to temperatures than skeletons.”

Denise gave a soft giggle, touched by his consideration. “I’m fine for now, Papyrus. I’ll be sure to let you know when I start getting chilly.” After a few moments of working up her courage, she finally reached out to take his hand into hers, blushing. “I … really appreciate all you’re doing for me, Papyrus. I’m really having a good time with you.~”

Despite the warm magic once again rising to his cheekbones, Papyrus didn’t look away, instead gingerly squeezing her hand. “Oh, I am too! I’m glad to know you’re enjoying yourself. …Nyehh… So… Speaking of good times…” Now he averted his gaze, fixating on the skewer nearly void of food. “I notice that you have a lot of fun with my brother with a c-certain activity, and I was thinking…. Perhaps, we could have a session of our own?”

Denise blinked up at him in surprise. Then she smirked, starting to feel perfectly confident for the first time that evening. “Oh? And what kind of activity are you thinking of exactly?...~”

“Ah–! Err!...” Papyrus grinned nervously, fiddling with his scarf, his tone rising slightly. “Nyeheh, the … the tickling activity? If you want to?”

Gulping down the last of her food, Denise snickered, her chest swelling with ever-growing excitement of her own. Sans wasn’t the only shy skeleton, it seemed. Lids lowering, the young woman sneaked a scritch at his spine while his free hand occupied his scarf. “Ohhh, so you want a turn at being at my mercy, do you? Well, who am I to say no to such a precious request?~”

“HEEK–!” Papyrus reflexively shimmied away from the teasing touch, but didn’t let go of her hand, ending up pulling her along with him. “Wowie, hehe…. Let’s f-finish our walk first, nyeah?” Now blushing profusely, he absent-mindedly nibbled on the end of his skewer with nervous energy.

Even with how flustered he’d become, Papyrus seemed to be perfectly comfortable with Denise’s teasing. He giggled happily as she poked and prodded at him the entire walk home, which only helped Denise feel more at ease.

Once their house came into view, Papyrus paused, curious to observe a delivery truck backing into their driveway so late at night. “Nyeh? Whatever could that be for?” he wondered aloud, starting a light jog towards the vehicle.

The sight of the delivery truck caused Denise to feel a rush of emotions back-to-back. Surprise and curiosity turned into excitement and glee, which subsequently transformed into alarm. Now that she knew what was going on, she had to make sure Papyrus didn’t. After all, the item she had ordered off of Gregslist a week ago was meant to be a big surprise.

Hopping in front of the skeleton, the young woman offered him a sweet smile. “Papyrus, you’ve done so much for me tonight, and I honestly could not thank you enough for treating me like this. But maybe I could try to, by taking care of this while you relax in your room. All that carrying me and prancing around must have tired you out, at least a little.” She giggled softly and traced a couple fingers under his mandible. “After that, if you’re still wanting to play a little before bedtime, I’d be more than happy to.~”

Papyrus had clearly been about to object, but the teasing touch and promise of more to come instantly weakened his knees. “O-Okay then! I shall get the room ready!” Looking down at her, he tenderly stroked a strand of her hair, his smile reaching his eyes. After lithely bending to give her a skelesmooch on the crown of her head, he danced his way into the house.

Denise blushed and giggled at the tender, loving affection, eyes arching at the kiss. She watched as her date ascended the stairs as if they were clouds to heaven, making her giggle louder. He was so hopelessly excited for what was to come, which in turn made her just as eager to claim the sweet, charming, ticklish skeleton all for herself.

Making quick work in signing the delivery man’s tablet and helping him trolley in a large, padded item – all the while grateful he had chosen not to ask any questions – Denise finally followed up after Papyrus to the second floor, and not a single self-destructive thought plagued her now bright and happy mind for the rest of the night.

#Undertale #Ticklish Shenanigans #Main Story #Papyrus #Denise #Harpy #Vulkin

6 notes · View notes

karahalloway · 3 years

Text

(Less Than) Noble Intentions: Chapter 2 - I’ve Been Waiting For You

Fandom: TRR

Pairing: Drake Walker x F!OC (Harper Gale)

Series Synopsis: The social season may be over, but Harper Gale's problems are just beginning. With everyone at court a potential suspect, can she and Drake survive the engagement tour and get to the bottom of the plot against her and clear her name? An AU take of TRR2 featuring my OTP - Harper & Drake.

Masterlist: (Less Than) Noble Intentions

Chapter Summary: It’s the morning after the Coronation Ball, and Harper receives a surprise wake-up call...

Word Count: 4,200

Rating/Warnings: E (swearing, angst, lemons)

Chapter theme song:

(English version)

Bonus Material: Artwork

Chapter 2 - I’ve Been Waiting For You

I am woken from my fitful sleep by the sound of impatient knocking on my door.

"Go away, Maxwell," I grumble sleepily, pulling the pillow over my head.

But as the insistent tapping jars me more fully awake, I quickly realise that it cannot be the Beaumonts at my door because I am no longer in Cordonia.

Opening a bleary eye, I fumble for my phone on the bedside table. As I lay my hands on it, the screen flashes to life and I can see that it's 6:46 in the morning.

Since I’m supposed to be getting up in about fifteen minutes anyway to make my flight to New York, I turn my alarm off.

Throwing the covers back, I rub my eyes and flick the bedside light on, before padding wearily over to the door, wondering why the hotel had woken me at such an ungodly hour.

But when I open the door, it is not a member of the staff standing in front of me.

"Drake?!" I gasp in disbelief.

He's stood in the corridor, head resting wearily on the forearm he has pressed against the doorframe, dressed in the same suit he wore to the Coronation Ball. There's a duffle bag at his feet.

"Gale," he says with a tired smile, pushing himself into a standing position.

"Wh-what are you doing here?" I breathe.

"Chasing after you like an idiot," he scoffs dryly. "Again."

I throw myself at him with a strangled squeak, wrapping my arms around his neck.

He emits a grunt of surprise as he staggers back slightly, but I feel his arms fasten around me, pulling me tight against him.

I hungrily inhale the lingering scent of his spicy aftershave as I burrow my face into his chest. A mere nine hours ago I believed that the fairytale ending that I’d imagined for the two of us had imploded on itself. So, to have him standing here, now, in front of me, is the equivalent of having him returned from the dead.

"I thought I'll never see you again..." I whisper, trying to keep the tears of happiness and relief from spilling over.

He tightens his hold on me. "I tried to get to you. But by the time I got away from the Guard, you were already gone."

"I was so scared..." I rasp. "I had no idea where they were taking me. I honestly thought they might lock me up or something..."

"What they did to you is unforgivable," Drake growls into my hair. "Not just the photos, but everything. They should never’ve dragged you out like that."

"...and then when you called me at the airport..." I heave a shuddering sob. "I just... I couldn't..."

"I know," he says simply. "That's why I had to get here before you got on that plane to New York."

"Why?"

He fixes me with a stern look. "Because there’s no way in hell that I’m going to let those fuckers drive you away from court like they did my sister. I promised you that I'd have your back. And I'll be damned if I'm letting you out of my sight again."

A lone tear escapes the corner of my eye. “You didn’t have to…”

He reaches up to catch the wayward drop of moisture before has a chance to roll down my cheek.“It was never a choice.”

I feel my throat tighten as I look up at him.

The fact that he’d been willing not only to look out for me since day one, but also to drop everything to come after me despite my effective banishment from court, and after what I said to him on the phone, reinforces in my heart and mind that he really is one in a million — a veritable diamond in the rough.

And — in his words — I’d been a monumental dumbass to even have considered letting someone like that go.

"You okay?" he asks softly, running the coarseness of his thumb over my cheek questioningly.

"Yeah," I nod with a sniffle, peeking up at him.

I suddenly notice Drake's pale complexion and the dark circles under his eyes.

"Are you?” I counter. “You look like you've been through hell and back."

He manages a wry grin. "Driving on French roads can do that to you..."

My mouth drops open. "You drove here? How long did that take?"

"Nine hours, give or take," he shrugs. "I may have tuned out the speed signs..."

"Wouldn't it have been easier to catch a plane?"

"Yours was the last flight of the day and the first one in the morning wouldn't have landed until 10am," he explains, stroking my damp face. "I wouldn't have made it in time."

"But... how did you know where I was?"

"FindMyPhone," he replies with a self-satisfied smirk. "You turned your phone back on after you landed."

"How did y—?" I begin, before shaking my head. "Never mind..."

Given Drake’s status as a member of the King's Guard, he is probably used to digging up all sorts of buried info, so working out what flight I had been on and finding out my room number must’ve been child's play for him.

Instead, I ask, "Does Christian know that you're here?"

Drake snorts derisively. "Chris can blow me for all I care."

I pull back in surprise. "You don't mean that..."

"Actually, I do," he replies with a steely look. "For someone who claims to be head over heels for you, he did fuck all when that so-called exclusive pinged up on everyone's phone. Even though he knew the whole thing had been a set-up. In fact, it was on his order that you got hauled out like that in the first place."

I feel the wind get knocked from my chest. "Wh-what?"

"I've never come so close to wanting to deck him..." he grits. "So, yeah. His Majesty can suck it. Because after what he did, the last thing I need is his royal permission when it comes to you."

He yanks me to him with a feral growl, his lips locking onto mine in a savage kiss.

My mouth opens in surprise, but he gives me no option to ask further question as he takes full advantage of the implied invitation with his tongue…

…and I surrender to his fierce demand willingly, a heady moan escaping me as my fingers tangle themselves into his hair while his hands rake possessively down my back.

As I lose myself in his kiss, a part of me wonders how we’d managed to keep ourselves from ripping the clothes off each other every time we found ourselves alone after that first steamy kiss at the beach party...

...where he also told me that we couldn't do this.

Tearing my mouth away from him, I blurt, "But I thought you said—"

"Fuck what I said," he snarls. "I'm done pandering to him and everyone else."

Grabbing my backside with both hands, he lifts me up against him and my legs wrap instinctually around his waist. Trailing hot kisses down the side of my neck, he kicks his duffle into the room. Striding into the room after it, he slams the door shut behind us. Pushing me up against the wall, he loosens his hold on me and I slide down his hard body.

"Drake," I gasp as his hands fasten around the curve of my waist underneath my t-shirt. "Are you sure?"

His sudden fervour is in stark contrast to the past month where he had always been the one to pull back. But as much as I want him to not stop, I also don’t want him to brashly jump into something that he might later regret.

"Damn sure," he replies gruffly, his mocha eyes meeting mine with conviction. "I don't want to wait anymore... I can't wait anymore."

He seizes my mouth again roughly, his fingers digging into my hips with heartfelt conviction.

"Are you?" he asks, breaking off the kiss to look at me again. "Because if we do this, there's no going back..."

"I'm sure," I confirm with a smile, grabbing onto his belt to pull him closer. "I was done waiting weeks ago."

"Thank fuck for that..." he breathes, cupping my face in his hands to capture my mouth once more.

I sigh blissfully.

Finally — finally! — we could kiss each other in the way both of us had wanted to... no, needed to since that first kiss — thoroughly, deeply, uninhibitedly, instead of the desperate, hurriedly stolen moments that we've been having to make do with until now.

Without easing up his demands on my lips, Drake's hands skim down my neck. His palms brush over my breasts and I bite his bottom lip with a needy noise, the thin material of my t-shirt doing nothing to dampen the heat of his touch.

He makes a low sound in the back of his throat that sends heat licking through my core as he grabs the hem of my top and yanks it up.

I lift my arms up in anticipation of him pulling the t-shirt off completely, but instead, I feel him twist the material around my hands, binding them together in a vice. Immobilising my wrists against the wall with one hand, he uses the other to trail his fingers down my arm, over my neck and down the valley of my breasts to my stomach.

I try desperately to pull my wrists out of their restraints, itching to grab the lapels of his jacket, to tangle my fingers into his hair... anything to feel him under my hands, but his hold on me is immovable.

His questing fingers reach the sensitive skin below my belly button and I arch towards him, whimpering as his fingers trace around the waistband of my underwear. He pushes the lacy material down just enough to give his hand space to slide in.

I cry out as he makes contact.

"Christ, you're wet..." he murmurs against my mouth.

I throw my head back against the wall with a throaty moan as his fingers set to work on me.

Can't say I’m surprised...

The mere sight of him is enough to set my heart racing, so having his mouth and hands on me like this after having had to wait for so long is guaranteed to send my body into overdrive.

Forcing my eyes open, I find him staring at me intently, watching my unguarded reactions as he explores my hot folds, looking for my sweet spot. I see his mouth quirk triumphantly as I gasp when he locates it.

“This what you need?” he asks roughly, gliding his fingers over me.

I gurgle something unintelligible at him in response as my eyes shudder closes again.

I swear I hear him chuckle as he ups the pace.

My breath starts coming in shorter and shorter gasps as his fingers continue to coax me relentlessly. And if that isn’t enough, the feel of rough material of his jacket rubbing against my swollen nipples chips away at my very sanity as I feel myself spiral rapidly out of control.

"Drake..." I plead helplessly, my entire body quivering as my brain becomes overwhelmed by the effects of his ministrations.

"Come for me, Harper," he demands gruffly, his teeth grazing my jawline.

The unmitigated heat suffused into his words sends me crashing loudly over the edge.

The coveted waves of release envelope me and my cry of ecstasy turns into a guttural moan as he slides his fingers inside me, ratcheting up the intensity of the experience.

The tremors coursing through me make my knees buckle, and I sag against Drake's chest, gasping for breath.

Gently extracting his fingers, he pulls the rumpled t-shirt from my wrists and tosses it away, causing my arms to fall over his shoulders limply.

Reaching down, he hooks an arm underneath my knees. Lifting me up against his heart, he carries me over to the bed while I bask in the warm afterglow of one of the fastest and most intense orgasms of my life.

But I guess that's what happens after suffering through a month of constantly interrupted foreplay...

Placing a knee onto the mattress to steady himself, he deposits me gently on top of the covers.

Opening my eyes, I see him hovering above me, a reverential expression on his face.

"Christ, you're beautiful..." he murmurs.

Leaning down over me, he brushes his lips softly against mine. Grabbing the front of his jacket, I pull him closer, making him groan as I deepen the kiss.

He moves his hands beneath me and in the next second, he is sitting on the edge of the bed with me straddling his lap.

"Why are you still dressed, Walker?" I ask breathlessly, sliding my hands up the smooth panes of his chest as I plant little kisses at the base of his throat where he had left the top two buttons of his shirt undone.

"Why haven't you undressed me yet, Gale?" he counters, running his palms up my bare thighs as he nips my ear.

"Gee, I don't know..." I quip, slanting him an accusatory look as I slide my hands onto his shoulders to push his blazer off. "Maybe because my hands were quite literally tied."

"Were they, really?" he asks roughly, shrugging out of the jacket and tossing it onto the floor.

"Yeah," I whisper, trailing my tongue up his neck while my fingers set to work undoing the buttons of his shirt. "You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would you?"

"No..." he replies with a devilish smirk, his fingers making quick work of his cuffs.

I pull his shirt tails out of the waistband of his pants to get to the last two buttons while tracing his jawline with my tongue.

"Shame," I declare, grabbing the panels of his shirt to tug the material down over his arms. "I was hoping to return the favour."

"You wanna tie me up and have your way with me?" he grins as he tears his shirt off while I run my fingertips over his ribbed abs.

"You had your way with me, bud,” I purr as I quickly undo his belt, trouser button, and fly to yank the top of his boxers down, freeing his throbbing erection. "Now it's my turn."

He throws his head back with a strangled groan as my hand wraps around his swollen shaft.

"Sweet Jesus, girl!” he gasps as my hand starts working up and down, his fingers digging into my hips.

"How does it feel, Drake..." I whisper with a wicked grin, biting his earlobe with my teeth. "...to get an eye for an eye?"

"Fuckin' incredible..." he grits, reaching up to grab one of my breasts, the graze of his thumb against my nipple making me gasp. "But I didn't drive 600 miles for a handjob."

With a deft movement, he flips me onto my back on the bed.

Scraping my hair out of my face, I look down to see him kissing his way up the inside of my thigh. His eyes lock onto mine with a look so hungry that it makes my heart jump into my throat.

Reaching up, he grabs my panties and in one smooth motion, yanks them off me. Tossing them over his shoulder, he continues his quest up my body with his hands and mouth, making me squirm and pant as he gets higher and higher.

I arch my back off the bed with a low moan as his mouth finds my nipple and he begins teasing it with his tongue.

"Drake...!" I cry, as his fingers pick up the same rhythm on my other breast as he set with the first.

Digging my nails into his waist, I thrust my hips up desperately, needing to feel him inside me already.

"Impatient, are we?" he murmurs as he gives me one more sensuous lick that makes me quiver all over.

"You have no idea..." I pant, my entire body tingling in the wake of his attentions.

Pushing himself off the bed with a chuckle, he sets about pulling his shoes and socks off. "I might have some," he assures me with a wry smirk as he shoves his pants and boxers down.

My eyes widen at the sight of him in all his naked glory — like Michelangelo's David come to life — and it makes me want him all the more.

His voice interrupts my thoughts. "Do I need to grab a rubber?"

My mouth curves into a grin. "You came prepared?"

"Always," he replies with a cocky grin. "You never know when you might need one."

"We're good," I tell him.

Because I hadn't wanted the hassle of constantly having to remember to take the pill each morning, I'd had an IUD put in a few years ago.

"Now, come here," I command, cocking a finger at him.

"Yes, ma'am," he concedes with a sultry look.

Reaching up to pull him back down on top of me, my lips lock onto his.

I can feel his rock-hard erection throbbing between my thighs, and I rub myself against him wantonly, making him groan.

"Harper..." he gasps, pulling away from me slightly.

I let out a whine of frustration.

"Harper, look at me."

Opening my eyes, I see his face inches from mine, his eyes coloured a dark espresso by arousal.

"Don't tell me you changed your mind..." I groan.

"Hardly," he scoffs. Turning serious, he says, "But before we go any further, I want you to promise that you'll tell me if... if you need me to stop at any point. I don't want to hurt you."

His touching concern makes my throat constrict with emotion. I reach up to stroke his face reassuringly. "I will."

He turns his face to kiss the inside of my palm, his expression tender. Adjusting his position between my legs, he reaches down to line himself up, eyes not leaving mine.

I gasp as he enters me with exquisite slowness, giving me time to adjust to his size before edging cautiously deeper, inch by glorious inch.

My fingers dig into his shoulders as he fills me.

Oh, my God... He feels a hundred times better than I could've ever imagined...

"You...okay?" he huffs, his face a mask of concentration above me.

"More than okay," I breathe, wrapping my legs around his waist to nudge him all the way in. "Now fuck me like you mean it."

I get that he’s trying to be careful, given that this is our first time together. But I’ve waited way too long for this, so the last thing I want is slow and gentle.

He smirks down at me. "You kiss your mother with that mouth?"

"Only you..."

He emits a low groan as he begins to move against me, gradually at first, but soon picking up momentum as I urge him on with a strategically positioned heel on his backside, my arms locked around his shoulders.

"Christ, you feel amazing...!" he gasps as he finds his rhythm.

The electrifying sensation of him moving against me is sends me into a tail spin.

"Drake! Oh, Drake!” I cry in abandon. “I love you... Don't you dare stop!"

He judders to a halt mid stroke and I let out a high-pitched squeal of protest, the sudden interruption causing me to shake uncontrollably from my pent-up need.

"Wh-what did you say?" he pants.

"Don't stop..." I moan, thrusting my hips against him in a frantic attempt to get him going again, but he remains stubbornly still.

"No. Before that."

My eyes snap open, and I gasp in sudden realisation.

Oh, my God… Did I just—?

Glancing up surreptitiously, I see that he's staring at me with laser-like focus, a strange mixture of emotions on his face.

Feeling myself turn beet red, my hands fly up to cover my face. "I... I didn't think I said it out loud."

"Did you mean it?"

Peeking out from behind my fingers, I see that he's looking at me as if I might bolt any second.

Not trusting myself to speak, I give him a small nod, biting my bottom lip nervously.

Please don’t let him freak…

His eyes widen and I see relief flit across his face. "Oh, Harper. I love you too,” he breathes, gathering me against his chest in a tight embrace.

"You do?"

He pulls away slightly to fix me with a wry look. "You think I'd’ve driven through the night if I didn't?"

"Well... For all I know, extreme driving could be one of those essential life-skills that you insist on honing in your spare time."

"Hah. You're funny, y'know that?" he replies dryly, though I can see the light dancing in his eyes.

"One of the reasons you love me, I'm sure," I tease with a smile, grabbing his hair and pull him down for a kiss.

I don’t know exactly when I ended up falling in love with him. Maybe that afternoon when he gave me the phone and the money without expecting anything in return, or that horrible day when he got arrested and I became overwhelmed by a blinding determination to move heaven and earth for him.

But now that I’ve said those three magic words out loud, I’m surprised that it’s taken me this long to admit to myself — and to him — how I felt. Because, in a way, it feels like I've always loved him.

And to find out that he feels the same way about me... Well, that just makes me feel like I’ve died and gone to Heaven.

"I love everything about you," he corrects, breaking off the kiss to trail his lips along my neck and jawline, making me sigh happily. "The smell of your hair, the taste of your lips, the sound of your laugh. God help me, even your relentless Yankee sass."

"Is that right?" I gasp as he begins moving against me again.

His mouth comes down on mine in a passionate kiss that takes my breath away. "Damn straight, girl. You're perfect."

"I'll...remind you... of that..." I pant as I slide my hands down his back, digging my nails into his hips to arch up against him with each stroke.

"No... doubt," he grunts with a wry smile before fusing our lips together again.

I kiss him back hungrily, my tongue invading his mouth. He responds in kind, drinking me in like a thirsty man finally finding water after wandering the desert for days.

But as the pace becomes increasingly frenzied, keeping our lips locked together becomes more and more difficult as the building intensity begins to take its toll on our breathing.

He slips a hand underneath my ass to adjust the angle between us, the increased depth of the altered position making both of us groan. Our grip on each other tightens as we drive each other closer to the edge, our breaths now coming only in gasps and moans as we hurtle inevitably towards the abyss of release.

"Drake!"

"Oh, sweet Jesus... Harper...!"

I cry out as the tightened coil inside of me snaps and I am overwhelmed by an even more intense climax than the one I had earlier.

I feel Drake tense as well before throwing his head back to explode inside me a second later with a strangled groan.

We ride the exhilarating high together, clinging to each other as wave after wave washes over us.

With a few more delicious bucks of his hips, he collapses on top of me with a shudder, our bodies slick with sweat and the results of our lovemaking.

Gulping air to try and catch our breaths, neither of us attempt to move for several long minutes as we bask in the warmth of our post-coital bliss.

Eventually, however, I feel Drake stir as he lifts his head.

I open a heavy eyelid to see that he is gazing at me with a serene expression.

"I love you," he whispers against my lips before closing the distance with a gentle kiss.

"Mmm..." My mind is a puddle of mush, and I cannot bring myself to form coherent words.

"That good, huh?"

"Mmm-hmm."

Drake rolls off me with a chuckle and the cool air of the room hits me, making me shiver.

Reaching over to flick off the bedside light, he gathers me back against his chest and pulls the covers over us.

Draping my arm across him, I inhale the smell of his skin as the glide of his hand on my back lulls me into oblivion.

The story continues in Chapter 3 - Hotel Room Service

Permatags (let me know if you want to be added!)

@twinkleallnight @lovingchoices14 @petiteboheme @aussiegurl1234 @queen-arabella-of-cordonia @tessa-liam @alyshak92 @secretaryunpaid @princessleac1 @walkerdrakewalker @fictionloveevie @angelasscribbles @drakewalkerisreal @nestledonthaveone @tinkie1973 @lunaseasblog @indiana-jr @twinkle-320 @choicesficwriterscreations @knaussal @differenttyphoonwerewolf @texaskitten30 @kingliam2019 @pinklipsandmasonjars @sillydg @spookycolorpeanut @peonierose @mrsnazariowritesagain

#less than noble intentions #harper gale #drake walker #drake x mc #the royal romance #trr fanfic

83 notes · View notes

cowboylikeghost · 3 years

Text

Here are 73 fact about me that nobody ask for but i need validation

1- I love Reading, drawing and plants even if i always kill them

2- I'm a whore for Jane Austen

3- I love when people prove that a conspiracy theory is false

4- I have a weird passion for geology and paleontology

4- I probably have undiagnosed ADHD because of my mother

5- I'm bad at frienship, every of them have to be special

6- My love language is talking about my passion and learning everything about the person, people think it's weird, i have nobody

7- I'm hopeless romantic even if i act like i'm not

8- I hate being touch and i hate hug, they feel weird to me

9- I hate when someone is next to me and their arm or knee touch me, it's make me feel anxious

10- I'm an introvert with diagnosed social anxiety, i'm also an infp and a sagittarius

11- I'm bi and disgusted about the idea of having s*x with someone, i think i'm ace, nobody will ever love me like i do

12- Autumn is the best season and i basically live for rainy day, if it could rain forever i will be the happiest

13- I love academic validation but i suck at school, my only way to work is to pretend i'm Chilton Rory Gilmore

14- I read non stop for 6 month and after i go on a reading slump for the rest of the year

15- I don't have a stable personality

16- I write sad poetry

17- I'm sad and this is my main personality trait

18- My family said that i'm basically sadness from this Disney movie

19- I want to move in a cottage in England with a lot of mountains so i can found cool rocks

20- I have a no self control and a big problem with my emotions

21- I get angry very easily

22- I only have 3 friends and one of them is my sister

23- I have commitment issues

24- I broke up two times in two years with two different girls that lives at more than 8h from me

25- I hate what the french language became even if i can't write a sentence without any fault

26- English is my fav subject at school

27- I hate eyes contact, it's make me uncomfy and i feel like people judge me

28- I feel like i'm better than everyone

29- I feel like everyone hate me

30- I feel sorry for every teacher

31- I love being in my bed, scrolling on my phone or reading but i hate sleeping because i feel like i'm wasting my time

32- Sometimes i wake up in the middle of the night because i feel like i forgot something for school, even if i'm in vacation

33- I hate people at school because i get bullied

34- People don't like me but i would kill to have someone like me in my life so i don't understand

35- I don't understand every jokes, i just know it's suppose to be funny so i laught, i just understand that

36- Taylor Swift is my only religion

37- I Iove more Harry styles songs than Harry styles himself, i found him arrogant and he always date problematic women, Stan Niall

38- I would do anything for Ben Barnes and Tom Hiddleston or any british men in their 40 who have a degree in literature

39- I relate to Spencer Reid in a way that nobody could ever understand

40- I love true crime, my favorite stories are about cult

41- My love for my cat is not healthy, if he died, i have to follow him

42- I alway stop watching Gilmore girls when Rory finish Chilton because i hear that she became annoying but she's one of my confort character so i don't want to see it

43- I prefer the marauders over the golden trio

44- I'm a Remus Lupin kinnie and a James Potter Simp

45- I hate Dumbledore with my whole heart i could talk about it for hours

46- I started all the young dudes, i like it but i cry at every chapter so i stoped

47- I hate my brother but if he died i would be destroyed

48- When i was little i have an obsession with panda and now i have panda everywhere in my room

49- I don't know if i want to live alone forever because i like the idea or because of any other reason

50- I alway need adults validation

51- When i was a kid i was sleeping with my socks on because i liked it but i learned that some people think it's weird so i stoped

52- I eat my cereal with no milk and i don't understand the debate, for me it always taste the same: disgusting

53- I hate touching food that isn't mine ( like when someone ask if you want to taste their meal, or if you have to clean something that someone else eat in, it's just make me want to threw up)

54- I have to sleep with no sound, if you breath a little to loud i will not be able to sleep, i'll be angry and probably hit you, one time my sister breathed too loud and i cryed

55- When i was a kid i hated turtle neck, it maked me feel like i was chocking but i learned how to support it even if it's still uncomfy

56- I hate when a shirt, a dress or a blouse show too mutch of my skin, i don't like it

57- I always wear a tank top with my t-shirt and if i don't i feel naked

58- My first panick attack was because i had a fight with my brother and my dad was yelling at me and didn't see it (i'm not mad at him)

59- When i was little i acted like i couldn't read because i was scared my mom will not read story to me anymore

60- I had my first phone at 13 but i wish i didn't

61- When i was 11 i started reading sm*t on my DS and it became an addiction, i wish everyday i forget what i read

62- I realise i was bi because of Millie Bobby Brown in Stranger things

63- I didn't realise my feminisme wasn't good until a 12yrs old insulted me in a comment section, i said thanks to her after

64- I love kids, i think they're cute and i'm jealous of their innocence so i act like i hate them

65- I want to raise a kid alone in the forest

66- I'm sure that my grandma in my dad side is a lesbian and that my mom is bisexual but have internalised homophobia

67- I hate when boomer joke about hating their husband/wife, just divorce

68- I still have my babies plush even if they're disgusting and look possessed

69- I sleep with my fairy lights on because three month ago i had a sleep paralysis

70- My parents are responsible of 80% of my insecurities and don't even know it

71- I love when it's get dark earlier in autumn/winter

72- I'm an Amy March simp

73- I just made a liste of 73 fact about me

100 notes · View notes

fangirlincorporate · 2 years

Text

Thoughts while reading Ch 45

Of course. Always a simp for Bisha. That’s okay I am too Kazuma 👌 Bisha is my alter ego I tell you. Bad ass and ready to fight. In reality though I’m just a dork with a smart mouth.

Ohmygod Yato don’t tell Yukine that 😂 he’s such a bullshitter man. I love him though. From child to pervert (kinda) to bad ass in .2 seconds. Sounds about right when describing Yato. Any disagreements?

Good ole’ Hiyori being a sleuth. Now she gonna know it was Yato’s dad all along kissing her up on that “date” Yikes.

Imagine finding out your crushes dad not only took you on a date, but kissed you. Lord have mercy. I think I would die. I also would’ve sucker punched him right after that kiss though 🤷‍♀️ wonder what he would’ve done if sweet little Hiyori hit him with a Jungle Savate. I would’ve been rolling I kid you not. I can almost picture the look on his face. I’ll take that satisfaction with me as I read the rest of this.

Please tell me I’m not only who wishes she would’ve been able to do that. I request a drawing ✍️ I have money 🤗

I too must be a child because I laughed so hard I started choking and my boyfriend had to come save me. Deadass.

Also this isn’t going to solve the childlike curiosity Yato. Kids don’t let that shit go. They want to know everything I tell you.

I know this because I babysat this kid once and he ALWAYS had questions. He was twelve I think. Anyway my moms friend got mad at me because I was asked where babies come from and I said they get pushed out of ya know. (She did not like that) but he didn’t stop there like I thought. I expected him to be disgusted I was very wrong. He then wanted to know how it gets big enough. I was appalled. I told him to ask his mom.

Kids are wild. Side note his theory was that it inflates. He was not far off. Health class must have really been an eye opener.

Oh no no no. You better not have any bright ideas right now. Hiyori best get back to her body. I do not like this. Double nope.

Well for a second I thought he was going to try his possession thing on her, but I suppose possessing a little boy is somehow worse.

Yukine you get back home right now. My peaceful thoughts were short lived. Let the rest of this chapter be alright.

Fair question Hiyori however some things are better left unknown. Children don’t seem to understand this concept. Sigh.

When Yukine finds out because I’m sure he’s going to soon. I bet he’s gonna take it really hard. I’m not prepared.

Also I thought this was really cute. 🥺

Man I’ve seen, read, and even have written some pretty twisted and dark things but somehow looking at these kids with ears they cut off hanging above their heads has managed to make my skin crawl.

There’s just something about the slow corruption of children that really gets to me more so than anything else. 🤢

I’ve been excited to know more about Yato and learn his backstory for the better half of 6 years now, and it’s even more sad than I originally anticipated. Send help.

Ooo and Hiyori is along for the ride too. Nice. What a not so lovely trip down memory lane.

Ch 46 LETS GOOOOO

#anime #anime blog #noragami #noragami stray god #yato #yukine #iki hiyori #yatonoragami #hiyori iki #yatogami #yato god

19 notes · View notes

hopelessromanticvirgo · 3 years

Text

Sincerely, Always Yours

Chapter 46

Chapter 45

“If you won’t get here in 30min I swear to god I will never talk to you again.”

Well, that sounded pretty promising Sander’d say, so after he tried to get his shit together, which he only had 20min to do so, he was standing outside of the door he closed just a few hours ago.

I need to take a big breath. He tells himself and tries to calm down a little bit but he can’t, so he breathes in and out with his trembly lips and sighs after he’s done.

Should he knock?

Should he just walk in?

Sander knows he makes a lot of mistakes, he also knows that the most of them are pretty damaging but right now, he got a new record, he’s sure he has never fucked up like he did at this moment.

Not only he confessed the thing he has been hiding almost his whole life, but he also accidentally admitted lying to the boy he loved for months.

What a day this has been and it only just began.

Sander decided to open the door and walk in. He tried to do is as silently as he possibly could so maybe he would have some more time until the other boy would notice he was there but all his hopes were crushed when he saw him sitting on the couch, in the livings room, their eyes meeting each other as soon as Sander opened the door, the room’s door being open which technically meant that Sander could see it from the entrance.

He avoided his gaze, closed the door and stood there, not moving, looking at the boy in front of him, his heart feeling like it was about to have an attack, trying to figure out how Robbe must be feeling from the look on his face but for the first time ever, Sander couldn’t see what he was thinking.

He swallowed, wanting to run away again, just disappear from existence.

He run this morning so he wouldn’t have to go though this conversation right now but things weren’t working out well for him today, were they?

People say that the time passes slowly when you’re in a complete deadly silence and they are right. Sander could hear the breeze coming from kitchen’s half open window, tried to focus on that, the only source of sound he was hearing, so he wouldn’t lose his mind because of quietness.

He don’t know what to do. He’s here, like Robbe told him to be, and he took only twenty four minutes so he was on time, as much as he wanted to vanish, but the boy sounded threatening when he texted him that and only that, so Sander’s brain decided that maybe things weren’t over if he wanted to see him.

“Hi?” He mumbled and regretted it immediately.

Hitting himself in the face in his mind. Why does he always say the wrong things? He just confessed his love to the boy, not even speaking about how he slept with him yesterday night and left this morning like nothing happened and he comes back to say hello.

Why am I like this?

Sander’s voice must have snapped Robbe out of his condition since he quickly got up and looked at him more closely, not taking his eyes off of him since he got there, his jaw clenched.

There we go, this must be the part where I get hurt, as if I’m already not questioning my whole life.

“Hi? Hi?” He said, his voice raucous which made Sander flinch.

Sander looked up at him, there wasn’t anywhere he could go away so he used his time to peered at his face.

Robbe’s hair was messy, he was wearing an old t-shirt which Sander remembered from somewhere but couldn’t put his mind to it now, and one of his black sweatpants.

His face looked exhausted, cheeks stained and red-ish, voice hoarse.

Sander looked down at his feet, couldn’t keep the eye contact, lost a battle, he felt tiny under Robbe gaze, dreaming the ground’d open up and bury him underground.

He couldn’t say anything, his eyes starting to fill up with tears.

Having an argument or a fight with somebody was one different thing, but having it with Robbe was another thing, which killing him slowly.

He knew he wouldn’t be able to hold everything in for a long time, he’d explode from tears if the boy kept being like this.

He really didn’t want to be there.

“You lied to me - you lied to me for months.” Robbe told him, still staring at the boy who was stuck by the door, probably wishing he could turn away and run. There was at least five feet distance between them and as much as he always wants to be closer to Robbe every second of the day, right now Sander felt that he was suffocating, the space was too small, he needed to back off a little bit.

Sander figured out that he couldn’t hear the wind anymore, and he felt so lonely, like his friend just let him here to die alone, his only emotional support just disappeared, he had no idea how to act and behave so because of that when Sander still stayed mute, Robbe raised his voice from frustration: “Fucking say something.”

“Fuck - okay - okay.” Sander muttered, a breath getting stuck in his throat, felt like he’d break down in any second if he didn’t control himself better, getting out of the daze, panicking.

“I -“ Robbe was still heavily staring at him which made Sander more nervous to speak. “You - you weren’t talking to me, what was I supposed to do? I just - I just wanted to talk to you - I’m sorry - I know it’s -“ he stopped when Robbe shook his head and started pacing in the room, turning his back on Sander, so he couldn’t see his face.

Sander decided that he needed this time so he tried to continue. “I was going to tell you eventually, I’m sorry, we just weren’t talking and I missed you and I didn’t know what to do, I’m sorry I know it wasn’t right but I never wanted to lie to you, it just happened like this and when - we were alright - I was scared to tell you, afraid I’d mess up things between us again.”

Sander tried to go closer even if how much he didn’t want to be there, he took a few steps, not leaving a lot of space between them.

Robbe didn’t say anything for a while until he stopped in the middle of the room, turned around and looked at him again: “You knew. You knew everything and you -“ he couldn’t finish, closed his eyes tightly, wetted and bite his lips to make them stop trembling. Sander also saw how his hands were shaking.

Robbe took another breath, now looked like a man on the mission, opened his eyes and noticed how closer Sander got while he wasn’t paying attention.

“Are you fucking with me? Are you doing some kind of sick and evil joke on me? I thought I knew you but maybe I was wrong for my whole life.”

Sander’s head was filled with confusion, he couldn’t figure out what Robbe was talking about.

“What? What joke? What do you mean?” He dared to ask. There was no going back now anymore. He had to live though this, he couldn’t just stop or turn back time.

“You knew everything, for months and now you’re telling me you’re in love with me? You fucking knew it. Why - why didn’t you say anything?” He started breathing heavily and that’s when Sander realized that he wasn’t the only one at the edge of breaking apart.

“Robbe, I have no idea what you are talking about.” He pleaded, his head already convinced that the boy was only mad at him because of the account and was completely ignoring the fact that Sander just admitted being in love with him for years. He’d feel bad about that realization if he wasn’t forced to deal this conversation right now.

Apparently, he shouldn’t have said that because it made the boy angrier and Sander could see it in his face but he was sure about it when the boy started yelling.

Sander didn’t know if he’d be able to handle this.

“You were letting me talk about everything for months. What were you trying to do? Make fun of me in secret for feeling the way I felt? You knew everything and you didn’t say shit for months? Months? How can I even believe that you’re - you let me talk about you to you. Giving me advices, making me believe that I needed to stay quiet for my whole life, making me believe I’d ruin everything if I spoke up. Letting me say - fuck - ”

Sander has been there for Robbe for a very long time now. He has been there when Robbe’s mom would lose her control, he was there when the poor boy would cry all day because of how hard things were going for him, he was there when one time while being completely furious with his father, Robbe punched the wall with such a force that he cracked his knuckles, but Sander has still never seen his this mad, as he was right now, throwing his arms around, his eyes glowing with fire in them.

The most important thing Sander had to make a comment about was the last sentence. He gathered his courage, his nails sinking into his palms to try to control his emotions.

“I know it was wrong from me to do it, I know and I was going to tell you, I swear but I - I don’t get what you mean - I know it was so fucked up and wrong but you didn’t talk about me so I just - I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Sander mumbled, feeling like a kid who just got expelled from school, now having to stand there in the corner while his parents would scream at him.

Sander really couldn’t understand what the boy was telling him, which was making Robbe more and more frustrated and that wasn’t a good thing.

“You don’t know what I’m talking about? How do you even dare to say that? You let me talk about you everyday and you - for months, Sander. For months -“ This time Sander interrupted him, which took the brunet off guard.

“You never talked about me.” Sander was getting irritated as well so he raised his voice, trying to prove his point.

Robbe didn’t back off as Sander expected him too, no, he in fact, shrilled at him, his face painful. “You were all I talked about.”

Sander froze, his blood running cold in his whole body. “W-what?” He whispered, his mind feeling it’d burn out.

“You were the one I talked about. Don’t you understand it now? I’m fucking in love with you.” Robbe screamed at him, the walls he put up finally seeming to shatter, the tears falling down freely.

Before Sander even had time to realize what he just heard, Robbe continued. “I was always talking about you, every single day. I have been in love with you since last year, or maybe that’s when I knew I was. And what did you do? You just listened, told me I never had the chance, told me I needed to stay silent and torture in secret. You let me talk about you and us and your girlfriend and how I was so jealous. And now you’re writing this perfect love confession to me? To kill me with it? If you’re not lying, why didn’t you say anything? For fuck’s sake, I told you we kissed when we got high, and you told me to forget about it. Why were you doing all this to me? Is this your plan for revenge? Destroying me because I hurt you? Well, if it is, you did a fucking great job.” His voice breaking, crying gasping for air, laying his whole heart out there in the open, all of his secrets and thought melting down from his head.

Sander automatically got closer to him, trying to hold him, his mind still blocked from any thoughts, just acting out of his character and emotions.

Robbe didn’t like the idea of him wrapping his arms around him. “No, don’t touch me. You can’t just -“ he started hitting his chest to push him away but Sander didn’t let him, being stronger than him, not giving up while the younger boy was struggling in his arms until he completely dropped and broke down. “Now you’re telling me all those things and I - I - are you lying to me? Please tell me if this is some kind of prank, I can’t do this anymore, please just tell me if you - but if you’re honest, why didn’t you say anything? Why didn’t you -“ he finally stopped trying to get away, now gripping Sander’s jacket tightly in his hands, trying to pull his self closer to him, holding him with a death grip, afraid to let go, his fingers turning white, looking at him desperately, trying to find some answers.

“I’m sorry - I’m - you were talking about - fuck - you were talking about me the whole time? Me?” He asked, needed to make sure again, his heart about to burst out.

Robbe started nodding his head furiously, looking up at Sander’s face with tears falling down on his cheeks after one another, with a huge hope in his eyes, making Sander feel that anything that would come out of his mouth would mean everything to the boy.

“I - I thought you were talking about - fuck - are you telling the truth?” He asked again, just to see the boy kept nodding his head, his voice weak to say anything else, still staring at him like he was the most important thing that has ever been created on this earth.

“I didn’t know - if I knew - fuck, if I knew I’d told you - I’d told you a long time ago.” He kept chanting, his whole heart screaming apologies, felt like fainting.

He had no idea how they got here but he knew, or he hoped, this wouldn’t turn out to be another wicked dream.

“Were you telling the truth? Everything you said? Please tell me you weren’t lying - I can’t - please - I won’t survive - I would never imagine the things you said - you - please I will die if you weren’t telling the truth.” Robbe kept begging, standing on his tiptoes, putting their forehead together, breathing his scent in.

“I was telling the truth. Everything in there - I felt for years and I -“ he couldn’t finish what he was saying because the boy who has been cupping his checks the whole time he has been talking, covering them with his palms, leaned forward to press his lips onto his own aggressively but somehow still softly and gently and Sander completely lost himself, pulling him closer but it was impossible to do so, their bodies were already intertwined together, Robbe still standing on his tiptoes, his whole body wrapped around Sander, one of his hand holding the boy’s jacket and the other lost in his hair, kissing him breathlessly, not stoping until they physically couldn’t continue.

The boys were still standing in front of each other, their foreheads touching, just standing, not talking, not doing anything, until Sander pulled away and started cracking up, laughing hysterically.

Robbe looked at him weirdly, asking what was so funny.

“Remember one time, when your jeans’s pocket was completely white after you washed it and you couldn’t figure out why?” The confused boy looked at him like he’s just grown a second head, Sander didn’t even pay Robbe’s look that much attention and finished his story. “It was because the other day I saw your pants on your chair and I put my love confession letter in it, and your dumb ass threw it in the washing machine. That was the only time I managed to say it successfully and after that I never dared to do so, well until that day when you came out to me but - I couldn’t tell you what happened back when you asked what the white thing must have been in your pocket, which you spent an hour scrubbing it off then, but I just remembered.” Robbe started laughing, not exactly from what Sander said since his mind was completely blank, but because Sander was laughing and it made him laugh too.

“I would never thought I’d have the guts to do it after that failed attempt.” Sander whispered against his face again.

“You’re a piece of shit. I just can’t believe you -“ Robbe groaned and hid his face in his neck, breathing his smell, not daring to let go off him, terrified he’d wake up and the boy wouldn’t be there anymore.

“I’m still mad at you.” Robbe whispered after some time.

“And I’m mad at you too.” Sander said, smiling, not even caring about anything else.

They’d discuss the whole things later, it didn’t matter, what mattered the most was the boy he was finally proudly holding in his arms, with a promise to never let go.

Suddenly, Sander remembered something he was wondering about so he carefully asked, running his thumb under Robbe’s eyes, on his cheeks. “Did you cry when I wasn’t there in the morning?” Robbe nodded his head slowly, closing his eyes.

Sander immediately felt his heart getting tight and he made a mental note about how much he hates seeing him in pain and promised himself that this would be the last time he would the reason for Robbe’s tears.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered and god knows, he meant it, feeling horrible about everything that has happened and what would happen if he hasn’t been such a coward.

“It’s okay. Just - can you just -“ Robbe tried to say but his voice was betraying him.

“Tell me.” Sander encouraged him, wanting to hear everything he had to say, always wanting to hear Robbe’s voice.

“Just - don’t - don’t leave me again.” Robbe whispered, opening his teary eyes to look at him, and Sander pulled him even closer, kissed his forehead and then put his head on top of his, felt the boy tightly wrapping his arms around his neck.

“I’m not planning to. Never again.” He felt Robbe nodding, lightly kissing his neck when he heard what Sander said, which made the older boy tighten his grip, he even got afraid that he was hurting him, but Robbe didn’t seem to complain.

“Never again.”

Chapter 47

#wtfock #wtfam #sobbe #robbe ijzermans #sander driesen #robbe x sander #social media au #sincerely always yours

129 notes · View notes

imaginesandinserts · 3 years

Text

Irreverent Pt. 46 - Salve

Title: Irreverent Pt. 46 - Salve Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Reader Rating: M Words: ~10K

A/N: Flashback Chapter set between Chapter 14: Superheroes and Chapter 15: Foyet.

Irreverent Series Masterlist

The bar was thrumming with activity and the energy that accompanies people who've all had a long, hard day at work and would like to do nothing besides forget. The team had gotten back from a case in the evening, and with only Friday separating them and the weekend, had all decided to head out for a night of drinking.

You look around, your hands wrapped around a glass of scotch - Derek, Penelope, and Emily were dancing in the makeshift dancing area, JJ was playing darts with some guys, Spencer was cheating people out of their money at a game of pool, and Rossi had long ago excused himself to go sit by some woman at the bar. You'd be dancing too, but the unsub had gotten the jump on you during the takedown and you'd been nursing a sprained ankle ever since. Hotch had stayed with you - whether it was simply to keep you company or because none of the other activities appealed to him, you're unsure. Likely the former - he was pretty good at darts too.

He's sitting across from you in the booth, a glass of scotch in his hand as well. He doesn't make a face when he drinks it, which you have to admire - it was such a man thing. You only drank liquor to get drunk and had been surprised with the drink by Rossi, who had insisted that you needed to drink something stronger than a glass of wine after the day you'd had. You take another hesitant sip from your glass, trying hard not to give away how little you like it. He could've ordered you a mixed drink - something sweet so you didn't taste just pure alcohol.

"What've you got going on this weekend?" you ask Hotch. The case had been miserable all around and you wanted to talk about anything but that.

He looks up at you, the faint hint of a smile on his face. "Haley and I worked it out so that I can have Jack the entire weekend. I'll have to think of something to keep him occupied."

You knew that Hotch would be content to do nothing as long as it was with Jack, but he liked to make the most of their time together and did his best to plan things out that Jack would like. "I saw a poster that said the Air and Space Museum has some special exhibit on this month. It looked interesting." You knew Jack would enjoy that - his latest toy was a rocketship that went everywhere with him.

"Saturday?" he asks, eyebrow quirked up in question.

"Make it 11, and you've got a deal," you tell him, with a small smile. "I am no longer entertaining plans at 9am."

He lets out a slight huff. "If you just went to bed at a normal hour it wouldn't be that hard to wake up in the morning."

This was an old argument with the two of you. Hotch insisted on always being the first in line to any ticketed event. He hated waiting - he'd start to fidget and get annoyed and keep leaving the line to walk to the front and see what was taking so long.

"Take it or leave it." You were sticking your ground. He could use the lie in too, he'd just never admit it.

"We'll pick you up," he says, bringing his glass to his mouth and taking another sip, eyes meeting yours from above the rim.

It was interesting how you and Hotch had settled into this routine of constantly doing things with Jack. You reckon he likes having another adult around when he's out with Jack - it definitely made things easier to keep a little kid entertained. You'd once mentioned to Emily that you were having dinner with him and Jack and she'd looked at you a little oddly, saying that she'd been on the team forever and had never once had dinner with her boss and his kid. You'd responded by telling her that she probably wouldn't enjoy it all too much - Emily liked kids just fine, but her and Hotch tend to get on one another's nerves a bit after a while. They were far too different even if they did work well together. Hotch would try and fail at limiting her to two glasses of wine with dinner and she'd annoy him by just putting the dishes straight into the dishwasher without caring how she did it.

"Someone sent this over for you." You turn to see the waitress place a drink at your table, and indicate towards a man in a wrinkled suit, seated at the bar, who waves at you.

You can feel your face turn into a grimace as the waitress looks at you expectantly. You avoid looking at Hotch across the way. You didn't need to see his reaction. "Would you mind telling him thanks, but, no thanks for me?" you ask her apologetically.

She nods understandingly, taking the drink back and walking towards the bar.

You turn to look at Hotch, completely exasperated. It was nice. It was a nice gesture - sending a girl a drink. Friendly. Yet, you're just a little at your wit's end lately when it comes to men. It all just feels superficial.

Hotch can read you pretty well by now, so he asks if you're alright.

You look at his concerned face. You know why - usually you don't mind this sort of thing. Hell, you pretty much encourage it with the way you act, flirting with nearly everyone simply because you can. It's like a sport to you.

"Are you asking as my boss or as my friend?" you ask him, eyes cast down towards your drink, following patterns in the wood of the table.

"Friend," he says, adjusting to lean in a bit more towards you.

Sighing, you shift a bit, dropping your leg from where you'd been keeping it elevated next to him. "Lately, I just feel like I can't get guys to see me. Like every guy I meet, they either want to date me or kill me," you tell him, referring to your job. "But beyond that, it's like I don't even matter."

Hotch nods understandingly at your frustration, his face a grimace at your explanation. He's unable to deny that that is very much the case when it comes to women quite often - especially in your line of work. You're all far too aware of the horrors of dating, being called in on numerous cases on dating gone wrong. "Aren't you still seeing that guy - Kensington?" he asks with a slight uptick of his jaw.

"Well, if you can call seeing someone six times over the course of about an equal number of months, then yes I suppose so," you scoff lightly. "Twice we got called in on cases halfway, once he got interrupted by a work emergency, and then most recently I accompanied him to an event at which most of the other dates were the kind that demand a retainer in exchange for services rendered," you say, alluding to the super model types you'd kept company at Cedric's business event a couple of weeks back. You could fit into his world quite easily, but you didn't want to. You'd left that behind for a reason.

Hotch chuckles slightly at that, amused at your tone and manner in which you referred to women who were essentially either escorts or sugar babies. You didn't really fit that mold - of that he was quite certain. For one, you definitely didn't need the money.

"Don't get me wrong, I actually do like him. We get one another and our background and upbringing is similar enough. He makes me laugh. However our schedules - both of ours - are highly unconducive to dating and in his line of business he needs a girlfriend who can leave everything at the drop of a hat to stand by his side."

"So unless you leave your job or he leaves his, it won't work out," Hotch finishes your thought for you, a resigned expression on his face in commiseration.

"Exactly. Which is a shame because he's actually one of the good ones. He's rich but not pompous, educated and intelligent without being condescending about it, and actually shows genuine interest in me and my job. Believe it or not, as basic as those things might seem, they are actually difficult to find all in one man."

He hums. "I can imagine," he says, taking another sip of his drink, a slightly amused expression on his face. You rarely talked to him about your dating life so he was actually very interested in this insight. He wonders briefly if there's any significance to you having listed the fact that Kensington was wealthy before any of his other qualities. From what he knows of you, he doubts you'd truly care if your partner had money or not. More than likely it merely helped establish a commonality, nothing more. However, from what he does know of the men you've dated recently, they all appear to be quite well off nonetheless.

"Anyways, all that is to say that I'm not exactly looking to entertain complete strangers in bars at the moment. I don't trust my luck."

"Probably for the best, anyways," Hotch comments, appraising the crowd at the bar. There really didn't appear to be anyone worth talking to - especially none of your caliber, per his judgement.

"What about you? How's the post divorce dating scene?" you question, feeling a little bolder than you usually might, since the two of you are already discussing the matter. Turnabout was fair play.

He's a little surprised at your forwardness. You tend to do your best to not meddle in his personal business, despite the amount of time you two spend together. He believes it's your way of maintaining some modicum of professionalism to your outings. Your conversations tend to revolve around cases, your classes from college, an article in the newspaper, or the ever present game the two of you like to play of profiling complete strangers walking by. He says its to hone your skills, but really he just enjoys how invested you get - how competitive and passionate, color rising in your cheeks as you defend your assessment, annoyance tinging your tone as you disagree with him, admiration when he notes something you hadn't, and pride when he praises your observations, your cheeks flushed a prettier pink and your eyes sparkling with satisfaction.

"I wouldn't know," he discloses, a slight flush in his cheeks. He hadn't dated at all since the divorce. He hadn't had the time and he hadn't really had interest in anyone. Not when you exist, so overtly present in his day to day life. He knows he's - in some capacity - using the outings with you and Jack as the closest thing he's got to dating again. Not to say that it was that - dating. However the fact that his weekends were typically filled by you and his son made it so he wasn't exactly left wanting.

Your eyes widen a little in surprise. Their divorce had been a while back now - you knew for a fact that Haley was dating, having ran into her with some man when you'd offered to drop Jack off for Hotch when you all got called in on a case last minute. You hadn't mentioned it to him, but you're sure he knew as well. "You're joking. Really? No one?"

"You might recall, I got divorced because I didn't have the time for my existing relationship. A new one requires quite a bit more attention than that," he says dryly, self deprecation dripping from every word.

You hum, narrowing your eyes at him as you stir your drink with the toothpick it came with, spearing the cherry inside and popping it into your mouth.

"You should just go for it next time we're in some whatever town. Every female detective we've encountered constantly gets all moony eyed around you," you inform him matter-of-factly. They're all so obvious too, eyes always drawn to his ring finger in search of a wedding band, and upon finding it empty, hanging onto his every word. Flicking their hair and fluttering their lashes at him, keen on proving themselves to be competent by sticking their noses into the profile.

"That's hardly true," he contradicts, shaking his head, the color in his cheeks having creeped down his neck.

You chuckle at that. "Maybe you're not as good of a profiler as you think you are."

He glares at you, however the lightheartedness remains in his eyes so you know you're in the clear for your jab.

"Anyways, all I'm saying is, whenever you decide to get back on that proverbial horse, I think you won't find a shortage of options," you tell him kindly. After all, Hotch worked harder than any of you. He deserved to find happiness again.

He rolls his eyes at your statement ever so slightly. His right hand was a much less complicated and demanding lover for the time being - he was making do just fine.

"So, on to the next for you then?" he asks, attempting to divert attention back to you and your existent dating life rather than him and his non-existent one.

You shake your head, a humorless smile appearing on your face as you start to feel just slightly light headed from the alcohol. Maybe accepting random pain killers from Emily hadn't been quite the right move. "Nah," you mumble into your drink. "Cedric can stay, if only because I don't have an actual good reason to end it yet. Besides him, the other two on the back burner are quickly losing what little appeal they held to begin with. I might actually take a break."

Hotch smiles as if he doesn't quite believe you're capable of actually taking a break. Your reputation for never being without a date far preceded you.

Truth be told, at first it was simply easier to always be dating someone in the aftermath of the John wreckage. If you could constantly keep yourself occupied and distracted in that area, while you actually gave turning straight a fair shot, then maybe you'd make it through instead of going crawling back to his bed. Maybe you'd stop seeing his broken face when you told him you couldn't be with him. Maybe the memory of leaving him standing alone in front of that tattoo parlor in the Village wouldn't cause your heart to ache and rebel against your own actions. Maybe. Just maybe.

Now, the pain of Julian's death and the subsequent fallout with your family was merely hurtful when you chose to think of it or were reminded of it inadvertently It was no longer ever present. That seemed like progress. Like somehow despite everything - the pain and torture you'd inflicted upon both you and John had somehow been worth it if it meant you could go to sleep without thinking of Julian. Wake up without your father's face looming ever present in your mind.

You and Hotch look up when you see the rest of the team approaching the table one by one as the night drew to a close. It was last call and about time to head home so you could all have a hope of making an appearance at the office the next day.

"You want a ride home?" Hotch asks you, noticing your slight struggle to get out of the booth.

"It's totally out of your way," you protest, yanking your coat on and fishing for your keys in your pocket.

"I insist, come on. You can't drive properly with that sprain right now. He walks towards you and placing his hand at your lower back, guides you out of the bar behind the rest of the team. "Your car should be fine and we can grab it in the morning."

You know he's right, so you allow yourself to lean against him ever so much more, letting him help you out to his car. Hotch helps you in and closes the door behind you, before walking around to the driver's side. You take control of the music, plugging in your phone, intent on introducing him to more modern music. The two of you made it through seven Top 50 songs on the drive to your place, Hotch complaining throughout and not finding anything redeemable in any of the songs you'd chosen.

Aaron looked over at you as he neared your house, your head moving along to the music and your fingers dancing across your thighs to the tune, a large grin plastered on your voice as you tried to convince him that this this one he surely had to enjoy. He actually didn't mind most of the music you picked out to introduce him to - you didn't just pick anything, you always did your best to pick something you thought he'd truly enjoy. However, he worried that if he started to openly like any of them, you might stop trying so hard.

He pulled into your driveway and walked around to help you out of the car, lending you a hand along the path and up the steps to your door. He stands on the lower step as you unlock the door, before you turn around to tell him goodbye. When you turn, you're almost at his height due to the different steps you two are stood upon and you're not quite sure what compels you, but you reach for him and lean in to a hug, tucking your head onto his shoulder. If he's surprised he doesn't react as such, wrapping his arms around you as well briefly.

"Thanks Hotch."

"I'll pick you up at 8:30AM tomorrow. Is that alright?"

"Sounds good. I'll be the one standing right here, holding the cups of coffee."

He smiles, rolling his eyes just slightly, before turning around and walking away.

*------------*

He first becomes aware of only pain. A piercing, stabbing pain that he can feel everywhere, centered around the abdominal area. He can't move, everything feels heavy. Opening his eyes is a struggle and he manages to only open his eyes a fraction, before being forced to close them tight again. It was bright. White and too bright for his sensitive eyes.

He's slowly starting to realize where he is - becoming increasingly aware of the pain and the bandages, the needle connecting an I.V. to his arm - he's in a hospital. He tries to remember what happened - he'd dropped you off, waited until you made it inside and waved him off, before leaving. He'd gotten back to his apartment. It had been quiet. Eerily quiet. Then Foyet was there. After that all he recalls is pain and Foyet's voice - over and over and over.

Do I seem impotent now?

You should've made the deal.

This will never be over.

Aaron finds it too difficult to keep his eyes open and closes them once again, slipping under.

The next time he wakes, a technician was present and the girl quickly hurried out when she noticed him move.

Once the nurses became aware that he was conscious, it had been a flurry of activity - doctors and technicians in and out to ensure he was alright and to up the pain medication. Some talk about internal bleeding and nine stab wounds to which he'd simply nodded along. He tried to ask for Dave - someone who could make sense of all of this. They told him no visitors yet, but that family had been informed.

Once Dave enters, that's when he finds out everything. Foyet had dumped him outside the hospital. After he hadn't shown up to pick you up that morning, you'd raised the alarm and Garcia had tracked him down. Nothing was missing from his apartment from what they could tell, despite the mess. The only thing left out was his address book. Dave had it with him and Aaron looks through it, going immediately to the one page that mattered. It wasn't there.

Haley Brooks.

Rossi had sent you to go get Haley since the Marshalls were getting ready for her. You'd left Jack with JJ, assuring him that you'd be right back. He'd already seen his father and you'd watched from a distance as Hotch had adjusted to sit up, insistent on not letting his son see him as anything but alright, even in the context of a hospital bed. Haley had been with them and you watched as her eyes flitted from Hotch to Jack - fear for her son and what he might have to go through, due to his father's job, her main concern. She was worried for Hotch too, of course. She must be. However, their initial interaction that you'd witnessed hadn't been quite how you'd expect a wife to react to her husband being in a hospital. Though, you suppose, she wasn't really his wife anymore. Not that it mattered to him - you're pretty sure in his eyes, she might as well still be.

You approach, and you can hear Hotch and Haley in conversation about what's going to happen next. Foyet had taken only the page in his address book with her name on it, so his intentions were perfectly clear. Haley and Jack were being targeted by a serial killer. That meant they needed to be protected, and you knew that Hotch would have to break it to her.

"Do you know where they're taking us?" Haley asks. You can hear the uncertainty in her voice. You wait outside, trying not to eavesdrop but it was impossible not to overhear.

"No I don't. And that's the point. I can't know where you're going. If you have any contact with anyone, then he could track you."

"Jack has school, Aaron. He has friends. I have a job now." Her voice is accusing and you want to tell her that none of that matters right now. The only thing that matters is the two of them being safe.

"I know. And I'm sorry. We will catch him. And you'll come back, and I promise that I will spend the rest of my life making this up to you." Hotch's voice comes out low and you can hear the anguish caught in his throat as he speaks to the mother of his child - telling her to take their son and go. Breaking his own heart in the process by keeping Jack away from him. Knowing that that is exactly what Foyet wants. Wants him to suffer.

"Are you sure that we're in danger?" she asks, her voice suggesting that maybe he was overreacting. You feel a surge of anger course through you at that. For her to even suggest that he was overreacting when he was laid up in a hospital bed with multiple stab wounds was simply…you didn't have the words. He wouldn't make her go through this over nothing!

"Yes."

You decide to intervene then. Before she can question it further and agitate him more. He needed to rest. You knock quickly, alerting them both to your presence. "Haley, the Marshalls are ready for you."

She nods and grabs Hotch's hand. You avert your eyes to give them their privacy as Hotch tells her to be brave and strong. He'll see her and Jack after she's met with them.

Haley walks towards you and you point her to the tall female agent standing at the end of the ICU doors, wearing non-descript clothing in order to not garner too much attention. She nods and looks at you, and you see a hint of something pass through her eyes, like she wants to speak, but then seems to think better of it and walks towards the direction you'd pointed her in.

You watch her go, before turning to Hotch. His eyes followed her until she disappeared around the corner, and then he tilts his head back and closes his eyes. You hesitate for a second, before walking in. Your presence wouldn't be missed for a few minutes, you hope, so you walk towards the bed and take a seat in the chair to his left, waiting until he decides to look at you.

"How're you feeling?" His face is turned towards you as though he's partially surprised you're even there at all. You wonder if he would've preferred you have left him alone instead.

"They're got me some pretty strong meds," he tells you, indicating towards the I.V. drip connected to his arm.

You lean over and read the chart hanging from the side of the bed, eyes glancing over it. "They got you on all of the good stuff - Hydromorphone will get the job done for sure." You try to smile but you know it won't reach your eyes right now.

"How long did it take you to sound the alarm?"

You shift, tilting the chair to look at him better, your teeth worrying your bottom lip and eyes narrowed, trying to work out why he'd ask that. The smell of a hospital was starting to get to you a bit - that odd smell that feels like despair and cleaning supplies. "Ten minutes. At 8:35, I called your cell and you didn't pick up. I called again at 8:36 and 8:37 and 8:38. At 8:39 I told myself I was acting crazy and that the weird feeling I had wasn't anything really. I just needed some breakfast. At 8:40, I called Penelope and had her track you down." You remembered the ten minutes of pure panic you'd gone through when he hadn't been outside at exactly 8:30AM. With anyone else, it wouldn't be a cause for concern. With Hotch, you'd expected him to be there at 8:25AM and so you'd been ready to go by 8:15AM with a travel mug of coffee for the both of you in each hand. He also always texted you when he left his place to come to yours and you hadn't gotten an ETA text that morning. Maybe that's what had originally put you on edge.

He looks at you, an odd look on his face at your explanation as if he's trying to decide what to make of it - the entirely detailed and rambling explanation he got from you, likely catching him off guard a bit. Great, he thinks I'm insane.

A small smile makes its way to his face however, and you're glad he's still capable of that, despite everything. You haven't yet looked down at his bandages. Foyet had stabbed him nine times. You'd seen the notes that Rossi had taken - what Foyet had said to Hotch as he stabbed him. Talking about how Hotch has profiled him as being impotent. The mere act of stabbing Hotch while taunting him with that particular piece of the profile -it filled your stomach with churning acid. It was the closest to sexual assault that Foyet could inflict upon Hotch and you're trying hard not to think about the emotional and mental ramifications of it all for him. The physical was one thing - that's something that people can move past with time. The violation of one's home and one's body however - the toll that takes on ones being and sense of self - that's much more difficult to bury.

Just to even think that he was exaggerating - you're mad all over again at Haley. You shouldn't be. You know that isn't fair at all. She was having her whole life upended. And yet…he was the one in a hospital bed and you're having a hard time recalling her seeming at all concerned for him. She must've been, of course. But…he didn't deserve to be made to feel like shit because of it. It wasn't his fault. Knowing him, he really would spend the rest of his life making it up to her.

You avert your eyes to stare at the wheels at the bottom of the bed. They'd wheeled him, unconscious, past you when you'd first arrived at the hospital, not bothering to go into the office and instead arriving straight from your place via a cab. You'd been the first one there, having Garcia call the rest of the team. You'd called Rossi so that he could be the one to call Haley. He'd known her longer. You'd limped your way into the ICU, bypassing every single security check with a flash of your badge.

Pointless really. They wouldn't let you see him. Family first. You had to wait for Haley and Rossi to arrive - they were his emergency contacts. You briefly wondered if that was because he'd never bothered to update it after the divorce or if that was truly still the case - if she would be the person he'd want to have during an emergency.

"Can I say something?" Your voice comes out small and hesitant. He hadn't said anything in the wake of your explanation earlier.

He nods, looking at you curiously.

You wet your lips, clearing your throat a bit and sitting up straighter. It's not your place, and yet.. someone should say it. Someone should tell him.

"Sometimes, when we love people, we allow them to hurt us. We allow them to ignore our pain in favor of elevating their own. We allow them to bypass our feelings and our needs because we believe we aren't as worthy of having what we need acknowledged. I get why, of course. Especially right now, but.." You trail off, not knowing how to finish what you'd started in a way that didn't complete overstep the boundaries that you'd already crossed. He'd know you had heard. He didn't need to know that right now, you didn't exactly love his ex wife. You liked her just fine. But right then, you didn't appreciate how she'd treated him.

Hotch looks at you, breath caught by your words. He hadn't realized you'd overheard the conversation between him and Haley. There could be no other reason for you to be saying all of that. You'd said it all softly, hesitantly, knowing you were crossing some sort of line and yet you'd still said it because you felt he needed to hear it. We love.. We allow… We believe… You were speaking from some amount of personal experience. Your first question to him had been about how he was doing - unlike both Rossi and Prentiss who had asked him what happened. He's not sure why the distinction matters, yet it does.

Haley was right too, however. He can't be upset with her. This was all his fault. He hadn't made a deal with Foyet and now his family - his son - their lives were being upended. Haley had already put up with a lot during their marriage. The divorce should've meant that she no longer had to bear the consequences of his job. He can't help but feel guilty for that - for putting her in this situation. Especially when he's so overtly aware that he could've kept it from happening.

He watches as you sit in that chair, eyeing him apprehensively, chewing on your bottom lip. You care. He can tell you care. You care so overwhelmingly that it's hard to deny it. Sometimes he wishes you didn't. It would make things a lot easier on him if he could think that he felt something for someone that didn't even think about him - that he never crossed your mind even. However, there's far too much proof to the contrary. So instead he has to live with knowing that you care about him, that you think of him, that you likely - in some capacity - love him. The way one might love a friend or a mentor. Somehow that's worse because he has to then deal with you saying stuff like this. Things that make it seem like only you care.

He doesn't know what to say and he can feel tears forming that he's quick to blink away, hoping you hadn't noticed. He swallows and just nods, not trusting himself to say much of anything that didn't involve asking you to stay - possibly forever, because for the first time since he'd woken up in the hospital, he feels seen.

You try to smile and change the subject, fill him in on the Marshalls' plan with Haley and Jack. Offer to get him ice chips or some food that wasn't from the hospital cafeteria. He notices how at ease you seem in the hospital, and comes to the conclusion that maybe a family member had spent some time in one. You seem to know which nurses to talk to in order to get whatever you needed. You watch like a hawk when they come to do anything with his medications. He's pretty certain you would've slept there overnight had Rossi not asked you to help Morgan with something on the ongoing case.

He misses you as soon as you leave.

*------------*

You catch Jack and Haley on your way out. You know you won't be seeing Jack for a while. The Marshalls would be taking them today. Everything was going to change for them.

You nod at Agent Montgomery - the U.S. Marshall that's going to be on their case for the time being. She shifts, moving to the doorway to give you guys a moment.

Haley is seated at the table, her hands holding onto some paperwork. She meets your eyes briefly and nods before returning to the documents. There's a pen in her hands and you can't help but note that her fingers shake around it a bit.

Jack is seated at another table nearby, Agent Montgomery having cleared the breakroom for their meeting.

"Hey buddy." You kneel down to where Jack has been sitting, coloring a printout that one of the nurses must've provided. Jack turns to you, showing off his work. "That looks amazing, Jack!"

He beams with pride at your praise. "Thanks, Y/N."

"I have to head out, okay. I just wanted to say goodbye before I left."

Jack gets up and hugs you, wrapping his little pudgy arms tightly around your neck, allowing you to sweep him up entirely. You know this is the last time you'll get to hold him for quite a while, so you allow it to linger, hugging him back tight. "I love you, Jack." Whispered into his ear while you blink back tears.

You release him and stand, making sure he's settled back into his activity and occupied, before turning to Haley. She stands, walks with you a small distance away from Jack. It isn't fair, what's happening to her. You don't really hold anything against her. It's awful, entirely awful what's happening - her whole life was about to be uprooted because of your jobs. Because of all of your collective failure to catch Foyet the first time. It was your mistake and her and Jack were going to pay for it.

You look up at her and you can see how entirely scared she is of what's about to happen. To have to do this on your own was one thing. Doing it with a partner, another. To have to do it all alone while supporting a child - she wouldn't have anyone she knew to rely upon. All by herself and unable to trust anyone.

"We're going to find him. We're gonna catch him. I promise." You know words were of little solace but that's all you have to give right then.

She smiles, a watery smile to match the unshed tears in her eyes. There's a shaky nod before she moves forward, hugging you in much the same manner Jack had. She's a bit taller than you, so you try to stand straight, allowing her to lean against you. "Take care of him." Her voice is a whisper against your ear, as though she's entrusting you with something extremely precious. Which she is, you suppose. She's counting on you to make sure that Hotch would be alright. That Jack's father would be fine, awaiting his son's return.

"I will."

*------------*

It had been a week since Foyet had left Hotch outside the hospital. A week since Haley and Jack had been taken into WITSEC protective custody and given new identities in an unknown location. A week since Morgan had become the new acting Unit Chief of the BAU, taking over in Hotch's stead. To the public - to the outside world - and especially to Foyet, it had to seem like his attack on Hotch had left him completely alone and broken - no wife, no kid, no team to lead.

You hated it.

The team had been assigned a new case late Sunday evening after you'd all pretty much spent the past couple of days in the hospital. Hotch was discharged earlier in the day and was under strict orders to stay on bedrest for the time being. You'd all flown out early Monday morning and it was now Saturday evening, the case having stretched out the entire week due to the Unsub's kill schedule.

You got back home after submitting your report, grabbing a water and a pack of the little bunny crackers you keep on hand for Jack. You're pretty sure you won't be seeing Jack before those expire and someone should eat them. You shower and get dressed for bed, thinking about Hotch. You knew he was home and would be coming back to work next week, doing the absolute bare minimum bed rest that the doctor had mandated. You're fairly certain the doctor had been intimidated into it by Hotch's severe face, daring him to say anything longer than a week.

It's fairly late by the time you actually crawl into bed, plugging your phone into the charger by the nightstand and flickering off the lights, plunging the room into darkness save for the red glow of the alarm clock stating that it was now eleven o'clock. You wonder if anyone has checked in on him while the team has been away. Perhaps Jess, but she must also be out of her mind with worry about Haley and Jack.

Before you can talk yourself out of it, you've grabbed your phone and scrolled to his name in your Favorites, pressing on it. You hold the phone up to your ear and listen as it rings, once, twice, thrice, until you hear the sound of it being picked up.

"Hotchner." His voice is low but doesn't sound sleepy, so you're at least confident that you hadn't woken him up. Having nothing to do but lay around must be messing with his carefully regulated sleep schedule.

You suppress a laugh at his formal no-nonsense greeting, even though he undoubtedly knows it's you. "Hey." Your voice comes out breathier than intended.

"Is everything alright?" There's a slight edge evident in his voice and you realize that maybe calling him at eleven at night when his wife - ex-wife - and kid are being kept away safe wasn't exactly the right move.

"Yeah, yeah. Everything's alright. I'm sorry. I just called to check in. How are you?"

There's a pause where you can hear the ambient sounds of your house settling in along with him shifting - the rustling of a bedsheet and the groan of the frame as he moves to adjust himself. So he had been in bed when you called.

Finally, you hear, "I'm alright. Thank you for dropping off the food."

"Yeah, yeah of course," you respond, your heartbeat picking up a bit for some reason. You figure it's because you're unsure of the call itself still and knowing that Hotch was in bed and you'd likely disturbed him in some sense at least, makes you feel a little uneasy.

For his part, Aaron had been going stircrazy, sitting at home with nothing whatsoever to do. The Marshalls had taken Haley and Jack the very same day. Dave had taken him from the hospital and back to his apartment and Garcia and JJ had dropped by the same day with some groceries and a couple of ready to eat meals for him.

He spent most of Sunday sleeping, the strong painkillers making him drowsy. Monday morning, he awoke to his doorbell and his nurse, Eric, from the hospital was there to help him with the dressage. He didn't think that was covered by his insurance - he could only imagine how much home visits from a medical professional cost - and had told Eric there was some sort of mistake. However, Eric had insisted that someone at the hospital had already worked it out and insurance wasn't an issue - this was a covered service apparently. Since Aaron already knew him, and he really could use the help, he'd let him in. Eric had entered holding a large box of food as well, that he said had been left at the door along with a note. After Eric left, Aaron had opened the box to reveal pre-portioned meals - all homemade, all different, all things he could throw in a microwave easily. The note was just signed with your name, telling him to call if he needed anything else.

He'd slept through most of the days, awakening only to let Eric in daily. He ate only because he had to in order to take his medications. Otherwise his mind was a haze of thoughts and worries - worrying about Jack and Haley, about Foyet being around the next corner, about the team managing without him, and somewhere at the farthest reaches of his mind your face danced around - worried and concerned for him, despite doing your very best to appear otherwise.

When your name flashed across his phone late at night, at first he felt the thrust of panic - that something had happened. And then there's your voice, calm and even, asking him how he's doing. No one else had called him. Dave and Prentiss had texted once or twice over the week, but with a case going on, everyone had been busy.

There's a brush of silence after he thanks you for the food and he can hear you take a breath and shift ever so much. He realizes that you're calling him while most likely lying in bed. It causes his heart to speed up and a tight coil to begin tightening in his stomach. It's utterly benign - he has no reason to feel that way, and yet, yet he does.

"How was the case?" he asks, desperate for someone to speak with, not wanting the phone call to end.

You're slightly surprised but you easily talk him through the details of the case, the profiling process and how the team had approached it. You find yourself babbling on for a while as he asks you questions about the evidence, how the local detectives had been, how the team was doing.

Aaron listens to you, taking it all in. You're good at this, providing all the details you know he'd want. You notice everything, all the little things. How the local detectives had responded to Morgan being in charge - how it had been easier for JJ to liaise with them more closely instead. How Reid was getting much more comfortable with having a weapon in the field. There's a soft, sleepy quality to you despite your obvious willingness to tell him everything. Your voice like a salve, doing more for him than any of the medications the doctors had prescribed.

He's not sure when or how, but the conversation has meandered from the case to something Prentiss had told you once, to a story he had of Dave and Gideon back when he first joined the team, and then to a professor of yours from college who had been particularly invested in the Bundy trials in a near obsessive manner. He finds himself laughing for the first time since that night at the bar with you.

When his eyes next catch the time, it is past 2AM. You'd been on the phone for the past three hours. Before this, the longest phone call he's ever had was fifteen minutes.

"It's late," he whispers, almost as though he doesn't want you hear him. "You should get some sleep."

You glance at your clock and find yourself shocked at how long the two of you had been on the phone together. Who knew Hotch was even capable. Though, you figure, you'd been doing the bulk of the talking, rambling on about something or the other. He must be utterly exhausted of listening to your voice.

"You should too," you murmur through a yawn, your eyes flickering under the weight of your lashes.

"Good night, Y/N." You can hear a smile in his voice and it's almost as though you can feel him - the way he feels when he hugs you, warm and strong, firm against you, surrounding you completely with his being.

"Night Hotch."

*------------*

Hotch had been back a couple of weeks and the team was adjusting. While Morgan was indeed the public face of the team, Hotch was very still involved and working far too much behind the scenes. You've kept an eye on him, looking for signs of him overexerting himself. He is, of course. He's burying himself in work, diving in head first because that's likely easier than focusing on everything else. So far, all you've done is give him looks that say Shouldn't you be going home? and Is this really what you want to spend a Wednesday at 9PM doing? He doesn't acknowledge them openly but you know that he knows that you see exactly what he's trying to do. He'll leave once he realizes that you're staying if he is.

You're not quite sure how to check on him during the weekends. Before, you used to have Jack as the reason why you saw him. Now, without Jack, you're not quite sure how to go about seeing Hotch and making sure he's alright, without it somehow being seen as overstepping. You nudge Rossi to go check on him one of the days and then another, you invited the entire team over for dinner so that you know he ate. You know he won't let you cook for him if he's no longer on bedrest, even though the way he holds his gun and the sharp inhale he takes anytime he has to put the Kevlar on is extremely telling.

JJ wants everyone in the conference room on the other side of the floor since your regular one is taken and she calls you to inform everyone of the change in venue for the scheduled meeting. You glance up from your desk after having told Derek and Emily of the location change, trusting them to tell Spencer when he returns. JJ isn't expecting everyone for another half hour, and Emily had caught Rossi as he was heading out to lunch, so he's also aware. Emily and Derek follow in his steps, asking if you're going to join them, but you wave them on ahead.

You take the steps up to Hotch's office swiftly, knocking and turning the knob in one motion, only to find him standing behind his desk, no jacket or tie, shirt unbuttoned, a patch of red visible on his skin from one of the stab wounds inflicted by Foyet. He looks up at you and you can feel the surprise in his eyes. It was your fault, you should've waited. That was stupid. Your eyes can't seem to look away from the blood spotting the otherwise white wrappings that sit in a pile on the desk.

"I - I'm sorry," you stutter out, blinking and trying to make sense of the sight in front of you. You notice that his shirt was also equally marred, the blood having seeped through. You'd obviously interrupted him.

He draws a breath, and you can see him try to put on a mask of being unbothered by your sudden appearance. "Did you need something?"

'Um, JJ had to move the briefing to the other conference room," you inform him, still unable to look away. You're staring. You know are. It's dawning upon you how entirely you'd fucked up. Hotch was such a private person. He'd hate having someone see him in such a state of vulnerability.

He nods. "Thank you. Could you close the door, please?"

You don't move from your spot in the doorway.

"Y/N?"

You're not sure what exactly has overcome you, except this overwhelming need to take care of him. Especially now, right then when he's hurting. Bleeding quite literally. Hotch takes care of everyone. Every single one of you. But no one takes care of him. Not the way he needs to be cared for.

You cross the threshold, shutting and locking the door behind you. He seems entirely taken aback as you approach him silently. There's a voice in your head telling you that this, right here, this was the definition of overstepping. Yet, there is a more insistent compulsion residing within you, urging you forward until you've reached him. He looks at you, confusion in his features.

"Let me." You reach for the alcohol wipes on the table, meant to disinfect the affected region.

He doesn't say anything, but he also doesn't move, making it difficult for you to actually reach him as he's standing flush to his desk. He only looks at you, brows scrunched together, the pronounced cleft of his lower lip set tightly.

"Let me." You repeat yourself, moving forward and forcing him to back up a little and make room for you. You deftly move to sit on his desk, facing him, and beckon him towards you without looking up. If you looked up, you might lose your nerve.

You part your legs and much to your surprise, he actually moves forward, coming to settle between them. You can feel the heat of his body radiating off of him. You're suddenly very aware of the friction between his dress pants and the material of your own fitted ones.

You take the alcohol wipe and tear open the packaging, unraveling the cloth before cautiously moving towards him and dabbing at the area that seemed to have opened up slightly. He releases a sharp hiss and suddenly, his hand is at your waist, gripping tightly. You pause, looking up at his face. His eyes are shut, lips pressed tightly together. After a second, he nods, indicating at you to continue. He doesn't make a sound again as you clean up the area, though he does tighten his grip ever so slightly a couple more times.

You look at the items on his desk and pick up the jar of salve that he must put on prior to the dressings. Carefully, you unscrew the lid, looking up at him with a question in your eyes. He nods again, barely looking at you.

You try to do it quickly. Fingers picking up some of the salve and gingerly spreading it over the region, brushing past raised skin, puckered up as it heals. Slowly. Not fast enough for him.

Aaron watches as your head is bent, teeth biting down on your lower lip in concentration as you gently span the entirely of his chest and stomach. Soft, dainty fingers quickly working so as to put him out of his misery faster.

Of all people, he didn't want you to see him this way. So vulnerable, so exposed, so scarred. You'd thrown him off balance when you hadn't quickly scampered away after you realized your error in barging in. Approached him with such purpose that he hadn't known how to turn you away.

You reach for the fresh roll of gauze next, swallowing as you look up at him once again. "This would be easier if you take the shirt off."

He shrugs it off at your words, placing it on the back of his chair. There's a fresh shirt on the seat of his chair. He'd been prepared, it would seem.

"This might put a dent in the line of women waiting to pounce." He indicates towards his chest, self deprecation dripping from his weak attempt at humor, in an effort to cut whatever imaginary tension he had made up in his head.

You look at his face, seeing the vulnerability and insecurity as plain as can be. He doesn't need to verbalize his thoughts in order for you to know exactly what he's thinking. What he's been thinking.

Who would want someone this grotesque?

Who would want a man as broken as this?

Who could possibly bear the sight of him - marred forever? His very flesh a perpetual reminder of the terror he wades through, the monsters he encounters, the horror that is his life.

"No."

Your answer is simple, straightforward. Yet nothing has ever confused him more as he watches you hold one end of the gauze to the front of his chest near the top of the scarring, and then bring the roll around his back, over it to hold it in place, your small hands ghosting over his skin with the utmost propriety, intent in making this as painless, as easy, as comfortable for him as possible.

"I'm not going to tell you some patronizing bullshit about scars being beautiful."

You control your breath in easy measured paces, forcing him to follow along. One breath in. Pause. Breath out. Repeat. You continue to wrap the dressing around his chest slowly, your eyes fixed on the task at hand to ensure that it was all straight and even, tight but not too tight.

"They do, however, speak to all that you've endured. All that you've conquered. Overcome. Anyone who loves you will see you just as you are. They would think you absolutely incredible. Regardless of anything. Because of it all."

Aaron focuses on your voice, soft and melodic and yet sure. So very sure. How could you possibly be so sure?

"Someone who loves you will see the scars," your fingers press ever so slightly against his chest, "and they will know. They will know all that you've undergone to become who are - how you survived despite the odds."

You take a sudden shuddered breath as you recall the sight of him unconscious in the hospital bed, being wheeled past you. You're quick to shake it away.

"They will be grateful. To have you, scars and all."

You finish, tucking in the end of the gauze firmly and ensuring it wouldn't come loose with just the slightest of motions.

You look up at him then, finally meeting his eyes properly. Beautiful, deep brown eyes with flecks of gold brought on by the late afternoon sunlight that was filtering through the windows.

Aaron can't help but look at you. He rarely gets to see you this up close. So very close. If he were to just bend down the smallest amount, there'd be no space at all. Your hair bundled back into a professional low bun, soft wisps framing your face. The cupid's bow lips - pouty, pink, perfect lips. The upturned nose and the slight babyface cheeks that accompanied it. He realizes his hand is still gripped onto your waist and he's reluctant to remove it. Not yet. In a bit. Not yet.

"Thank you." His eyes are closed as he says it so he misses it when you nod your acknowledgement.

You lean past him, one hand grabbing his forearm for balance while the other reaches for the shirt on the chair. You'd started the job. Might as well finish it. You unbutton the collar and he takes it from you, quickly slipping it on, and yet not moving away. His hand returns to your waist. Staying where you could easily reach up and start buttoning it for him. So you do.

Aaron knows you don't need a response to everything you'd said. He also is quite certain that you believe it. No matter the entirely shallow world you'd been a part of, he knows that you aren't like that. You might be a little vain - the nice clothes and makeup, the care you put into your own appearance. However, you're not vain like this.

Aaron breathes out a deep sigh that he'd been holding for some time as you dexterously work each button into its proper hole. He really could get used to this. To you.

"Why do you always sit on stuff?" His voice is soft and low, calmer.

You glance up, noting the slight humor dancing behind his eyes while he waits for your answer.

You can't help but smile, a breath of laughter escaping you just barely. "I suppose…because I'm short," you admit, shaking your head as you continue down the trail of buttons. "Makes it easier for me to be at eye level if I sit on higher surfaces."

He laughs. A near boisterous laugh. His chest rumbles underneath your hands, causing your fingers to tremble.

You can't help but laugh along with him, releasing a deep held breath as you do.

He would be alright. He would.

#aaron hotchner #criminal minds #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner x you #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds reader insert #irreverentseries #hotch x you #hotch x reader

62 notes · View notes

daaziscoolbesties · 3 years

Text

[REPOST] MY 2K WORD COMMENTARY/ANALYSIS OF RANBOO’S LORE STREAM

‼️‼️This post contains lore spoilers from Ranboo’s 4/23 stream, “The Enderwalk Saga. Chapter 1: The Lessons”. If you haven’t seen that stream don’t read ahead unless you want spoilers‼️‼️

disclaimer: this isnt really an analysis as much as a bunch of commentary and half-baked theories.

-on the way to the mansion he was sort of talking to himself saying stuff like "i'm good i'm good" which m a y be a normal thing but also maybe it's not and it flew over our heads cause he talks to chats and donos like that so often

-again, this one may just be a normal thing but when he was climbing up the stairs in the mansion looking for foolish, he repeats some of his words like down to the exact same tone of voice and everything. 12:42, "this mansion is way too big actually. this mansion is way too big actually." (why the repeated actually? seems odd to me but again it might just be a normal thing that i haven't picked up on). (right after) "okay okay lemme find him lemme find him" again repeated words in the e x a c t same tone.

-does everyone know about ranboo's silk touch hands ability thing? or was that just a techno and ranboo main character moment. bc if it was, how would foolish know that ranboo could pick up the full cake after it'd been partially eaten. unless everyone on the sever knows about that in which case this means nothing. but if they d o n t know... how would foolish know? ranboo wrote about it in the do not read book so maybe if it's not a publicly known thing maybe foolish got his hands on the book and read it??

-14:53-ish, they're talking about the war room and how it was for tubbo or whatever and ranboo says, and i quote "he prepares for lore but he's never gonna do it." now funny thing is at first i couldn't tell if he said "war" like in reference to the war room or "lore". but after playing the clip over and over i can say with ALMOST 100% certainty that he said lore. there is a definite L sound at the beginning of the word. which either means a) this was a slip up (doubtful bc he said later that there were no mistakes), b) he broke the fourth wall because they were supposed to be rping at that point, or c) i'm completely wrong and he said "war" which leads down an entire other road of possibilities

-15:17 "are you a book reader?" "*checks inventory for do not read book* uh yeah i'd say i'm a book reader-" dunno how i didn't catch this the first time I HATE THAT DAMN BOOK

-15:18 there's blue in his hotbar. where did he get the blue.

-16:40 "it's like a metaphor- i have two minds: i have my normal self, my normal little shift-dancing self, and then the builder one. the builder one is demanding. it's a very demanding mind." ranboo then lets out a weird sigh after this. i feel like what foolish was talking about was an indirect(?) parallel to ranboo in and out of enderwalk, there's how he normally is, trying to do best for others, and then there's enderwalk, meeting up with bad guys and "demanding" things (its very late as i write this i really don't know what i'm talking about)

-17:11 "you have your panic closet" i'm sorry his what now 😀 no but seriously how the hell did i miss some of these

-18:04 "you're asking me if i remember?" very funny ranboo thank you for making jokes in these trying times

-18:25 WHY DID HE GET OUT THE AXE WHEN STARING AT THE BEE

-19:38 why did foolish hold the grass block- most of these observations probably mean nothing but- h u h - is that- i'm too tired for this

-19:54 "i never properly thanked you for the deal you made with me" so foolish got something out of this deal, we're not sure if ranboo did. "the green cardboard box" again do you mean dream's house- but seriously the only people i can think of on the server that are associated with green are dream and sam. and i have no idea what cardboard box could be referring to. foolish got a lime colored shulker from drista

-20:30 "we're supposed to only talk about it at a certain location" hmm now where would that be? panic room maybe? cause like usually after doing a big thing in the enderwalk state ranboo wakes up in the panic room so maybe? the deal was that they only talk about it in his house

-21:52 how does ranboo receive(?) the lessons? like are they whispered to him in his mind or is he seeing them as words in front of him like we see? hmm

-"Lesson 14: If you have the opportunity to gain a favor, take it." "gain a favor" don't you usually ask people for favors though? how does one "gain a favor"? anyways i'm pretty sure lesson 14 has to do with the deal foolish was talking about. (the deal explained because i now have info: at some point a bit ago foolish met up with ranboo and asked to make a deal, he'd gotten a shulker box from drista. the deal was that ranboo would have ownership of the box, it would be under his name but foolish rents/borrows it indefinitely. ranboo negotiated that if he took ownership of the box he would get a "war favor" from foolish where if something happens that creates sides, ranboo can ask him a favor that could change his side. but why would foolish want ranboo to have ownership of the shulker you may ask? well i have an answer for you. a theory actually but still. basically since drista technically isn't supposed to give out shit on the server if someone where to have that stuff then they may get in trouble. foolish wants to be able to use the shulker but if it gets found he doesn't want to get in trouble, so he can blame it on ranboo seeing as it's under his name.)

-22:16-ish "i still have this from when you *can't understand whats said here*" well i guess that sort of explains why he had the grass block? idk man (info update: he had the grass block from when ranboo threw it at him telling him to calm down like what ghostbur does with blue)

-31:35 "i figured out how to cause it" how to cause the enderwalk state

-38:30 "ninety three lessons" I STILL DONT KNOW WHY HE KEPT SAYING NINETY THREE AND NOT NINETY FOUR AND ITS DRIVING ME CRAZY LMAO

-39:01 "it's all for the greater good" okay well when are you gonna start thinking about yourself and not everyone else for once huh. self care bitch.

-40:31 he started holding the axe when he was looking at sam- gonna say it i really don't like that axe ahahah- WAIT A DAMN MINUTE THE AXE IS NAMED "axe of ender" I DONT LIKE THAT I DONT LIKE THAT AT ALL

-41:53 is there something?? physically keeping him from telling sam??? or maybe it's sort of like his enderwalk state taking control to make him shut the fuck up??? so many questions and approximately zero answers

-43:18 ranboo raising his voice legitimately scares me 😀👍

-"Lesson 27: Do not reminisce on what you have lost for it will weigh you down." showed up when he was thinking about and REMINISCING about the community house 👀👀

-"Lesson 53: Never fully trust anyone." showed up literally after he said that he thinks he can trust the other people on the server enough to tell them about what he did

-"Lesson 67: Leave no evidence of what you have helped with." this is different from the others because there doesn't seem to be at least a semi-direct connection to it? unless maybe at the time ranboo was near something he may have "helped with"? not sure about this one

-"Lesson 94: DO NOT LET THEM KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE DONE" yeah yeah i get it i get it he's fucked up some shit in enderwalk i don't feel like analyzing this thanks

-OH OH NOTICE HOW HE SAYS "REMEMBERING" WHEN THE LESSONS SHOW UP. IMPLYING THAT THIS ISNT A NEW THING, ITS HAPPENED BEFORE AND NOW HES REMEMBERING IT. MAYBE HE WROTE DOWN THE LESSONS WHEN HE WAS IN ENDERWALK AND NOW THAT HES BEEN EXPERIMENTING ITS BEEN EASIER FOR HIM TO REMEMBER THOSE ENDERWALK MEMORIES

-okokok the experiments are that he's been e x p e r i m e n t i n g on how to purposefully induce the enderwalk state. and we know now that it wasn't from the pain of the water because on the stream afterwords he said that it's caused by the intense fear of something happening. and so the "side effects" of the experiments is that since he's in enderwalk more often(?) he starts remembering more things from it

-OH MY GOD WAIT "there is a reason sam, there's so many reasons, theres ninety three of them" (44:47) WHAT IF EVERY LESSON IS TIED TO A QUOTE UNQUOTE "reason" THAT RANBOO THINKS HES A BAD PERSON/NEEDS TO BE LOCKED UP BUT HE SAYS NINETY THREE INSTEAD OF NINETY FOUR BECAUSE THE NINETY FOURTH LESSON DOESNT HAVE A REASON YET/HE DOESNT REMEMBER IT HAVING A REASON

-dude honestly the whole sam part hurts so much this man is scarily good at acting

-46:46 "i cant put you in the prison you wouldn't be able to see michael anymore" bestie that's the point he doesn't want to accidentally hurt michael or tubbo in the enderwalk state—

-okay but there's no way that sam couldn't tell that ranboo was at least TRYING to confess to something- i feel like he definitely knows more than he's letting on because usually like when people do bad shit or admit to doing bad shit he's like in Prison Guard Mode™️ (he literally cut off ponk's arm because he stole some keycards or something) and whatever and idk what he knows but he definitely knows something and is trying to protect ranboo. or he's trying to manipulate him or smth either one works—

-50:38 "you are a good person" "i am?" you can hear my heart shatter. "yes you are" "i don't think so sam" "i do, even if you don't" "i really don't think so" and there it goes again

-51:25 hello badboyhalo i see you to the left of ranboo

-52:44 "but then my curiosity got the best of me" curiosity killed the cat, bitch

-52:54 "there's ninety three, ninety four, ninety- theres so many reasons!" SEE!! NOT ONLY ARE THERE THAT MANY LESSONS THERE ARE REASONS THAT CORRESPOND IM S O SMART—

-52:56 "i don't want to remember anymore!" *quietly brings forth my theory that when ranboo loses a canon life his memory gets wiped*

-53:13 "ive opened pandora's box" isn't the prison?? literally called pandora's VAULT??? so this m a y be a stretch but i'm thinking that maybe this could be taken in the literal sense that he "opened" the prison and let dream out (the sirens at the end of quackity's stream confirm that dream is indeed out)

-53:42 mans just straight up walked through a ghost i—

-55:37 so are we just gonna ignore the eleventh page of the book? "he's alive, but hopefully soon dream won't be"??? alright nevermind it's most likely bc when tommy came back he recruited ranboo in his plan to kill dream

-55:47 notice how he writes "what am i?" as opposed to "who am i?" no elaboration here idk what it could be

-56:08 just so it's clear for anyone who doesn't know- he's wearing armor at this point, and i'm like 90% sure that when he wears his armor water can't hurt him. and i saw someone say somewhere that like with splash potions when thrown it turns into a gas-like thing? so again, it didn't hurt him, he didn't get hurt. he said in the chill stream that he wasn't comfortable making it where his character had to hurt himself to do that. the thing that causes the enderwalk isn't pain, it's intense and sudden emotions like fear and stress. thank you for coming to my tedtalk.

20 notes · View notes

tobesobri · 4 years

Photo

𝓛iterally cannot believe there’s only four chapters left in this 😩This one is another turning point in the story and honestly possibly the saddest shit so far so i do hope you can find it in your hearts to forgive me.

huge massive thank you to the incredible @youresogolden-h for editing ❤️

CHAPTER NINE: PRETENDING (4.6K)

Harry and Y/N are friends…. with benefits, but not the kinds you’re thinking of.

🥥MASTERLIST 🌃INSPO TAG 🌻ASK TAG 💃PLAYLIST 🛌

By the time Harry got home on Saturday, he felt like absolute shit. And it wasn’t because of the flight or his nonexistent jetlag, it was because his kitchen was tidier than he remembered and the pile of dirty clothes he’d left in the hamper in his closet was, instead, neatly folded on his bed. He felt like shit because while he was grasping at strings just to get anyone in his bed with him, she’d been here cleaning his place for him when she didn’t have to.

She had made his bed again and wiped off the stray bits of his facial hair around the sink he’d left after shaving before hopping on his flight.

There was no way she didn’t know about what he’d done in New York, not after the photos came out that had littered every inch of the internet. He knew she didn’t use social media often herself, but he was positive it had been brought to her attention at some point. So while she was here making his life easier, he’d been fucking around on the other side of the country.

And he could never tell her why. That he missed her so much it seemed like a good idea in his drunken mind at the time. He’d just wanted someone to hold onto at night again so he could get some sleep, but instead he just got the awful sex he didn’t want and all the regrets to go along with it. He had no clue what she thought of him now, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to find out.

Still, he texted her and it might’ve been the cherry on top of all the dumb things he’d done this week, but it was getting late and he needed her. He needed to know she didn’t hate him.

(Harry, 9:46 pm)

Can you come over tonight? I just got back.

She rolled over in her bed, grabbing her phone from her nightstand and squinting her eyes at the bright screen only long enough to know it was from Harry. Quickly after scanning her eyes across his message, she put her phone back, face down on her table before she curled up under her comforter.

It was bad enough that she’d spent the past day and a half moping around her apartment, overthinking every single little thing. Even worse that she let it get to her last night, letting her pillows soak up her tears again, but she knew it would be too much to see him again right now. She just needed time to get over it. Harry could sleep with and see whomever he wanted and it shouldn’t affect her. She was just starting to accept that fact when he just had to fucking text her.

Because she could also see who she wanted to without it affecting him. She just… didn’t want anyone else anywhere near her if it wasn’t Harry.

Groaning, she rolled over again and texted him back. She still needed her time, but she was doing neither of them any favors by avoiding him. She didn’t want him to think she was mad or jealous or anything she had no right to be. He needed to know that if he’d found someone he wanted to be with that she wouldn’t get in the way.

(Y/N, 9:58 pm)

Give me an hour.

It was plenty of time for her to take a shower and get her routines done first so that when she filled her backpack, she had no trouble packing lightly. Sneaking out of her apartment with twenty minutes to get her to Harry’s driveway wasn’t as difficult with a heavy bag on her shoulders, especially since her roommates knew she was supposed to be in her own bed tonight.

She used up all her spare time driving to Harry’s place when she paused in front of his neighbor’s bushes and almost turned her car right back around. But she didn’t want to feel the way she had been anymore, so she kept going. All the way to his front door.

Where he stood. Where he stood with his arms crossed over his chest in a black hoodie and matching sweatpants, pacing his short front porch until she pulled up.

He watched her while she got out of her car, slinging her backpack on before shutting the door and meeting his eyes warily. When she got closer to him, it was clear she was beyond confused as to why he was standing out in the cold waiting for her. He was clearly worried about something too, the way he pinched his bottom lip between his thumb and index fingers, fidgeting in a way she’d gotten used to him doing when he was nervous or lost in thought.

He stared at her feet when she took the two steps up to the same level as him and it wasn’t until she stood there, silently waiting, that he scanned his eyes up her body and back to her face. A face he had a really hard time looking at without the urge to break out in tears.

“Is everything alright?” She finally asked.

He blinked once and then shook his head. “I’m sorry.”

His voice was a mumble from under the hood he had over his head. She knew what he was apologizing for, but he had no need to. They weren’t dating. He didn’t cheat on her. There was nothing between them that would stop him from doing what he wanted with who he wanted.

“It’s fine.” She mumbled.

Now he was the confused one. Her words ricocheted back and forth through his brain. It’s fine. He almost would have rather her deny having any clue what he was talking about. This was… it hurt. So fucking bad. He titled his head slightly, working on questioning what she meant by that when instead his teeth shuttered against each other as the breeze had finally gotten the best of him.

“Can we go inside?” She continued in his inability to say anything else. “It’s cold out here.”

He led the way in after nodding in agreement, noticing for the first time that she wasn’t dressed as warmly as he was. He wondered if it had really been the breeze that gave him chills or the way she had completely brushed him off that froze him to the core.

He locked the door behind them while she waited in the foyer. Something had definitely changed between them and she didn’t like it. She didn’t quite know how to fix it yet, but she wished more than anything they could begin where they left off on Tuesday.

Once he turned to her, throwing his hood off in the process, she turned on her heel and went for the stairs. She couldn’t do anything facing him the way she was. He watched her as she ascended the stairs, having hoped they could figure things out downstairs first but she clearly had other plans.

He huffed out a nervous breath, shut off the lights, set his security system, and followed her up to his bedroom.

She was standing at his window when he joined her and when he stopped in a spot a few feet from her, she glanced at him sideways just as nervously as he felt.

Because she was nervous. She hated confrontation, especially when they clearly weren’t on the same page about things. If there was one time when she needed to suck it up and tell him how she felt, it was now.

“You don’t have to apologize for anything, Harry, it’s not like we’re dating here. You do have to tell me if you want to be with someone, though.” It broke her heart to say that, to admit to herself that Harry only liked her in her head and not in real life. It broke her heart to even think about letting him go so he could be with whoever he wanted, but she knew it was only fair.

He was quiet, eyes intent on her even though she hadn’t braved even a second glance at him yet. It broke his heart that she really thought he wanted someone else, and he had no one to blame for her coming to that conclusion besides himself.

She sighed. “I’m not going to hold you back so we can keep doing this.”

He hid his face when she turned to look at him, trying to hold back the tears that were uncontrollably burning his eyes. He just nodded, sucking in a breath as he started to feel himself crumbling. He needed to get out of there, fast.

“Um, I think I left a light on downstairs.” He glanced at his bed then, but never once looked her in the eyes, too afraid his voice would crack if he did, “You can go ahead, I’ll be back in a minute.”

He left without even giving her a chance to say anything else that would shatter his heart more. Before he even made it out of his bedroom, he was wiping tears from his cheek and trying to hide it from her the best he could.

At least until he was downstairs, at his island counter, that’s when he let it all out. He leaned over on the marble, his forearms flat on the stone with his head buried in them as the sleeves of his hoodie soaked up his tears. His entire body shook like a nine-point magnitude earthquake had just rolled through his chest with little care for the essential organs that lived there.

He cried harder when he thought about the way he’d walked out of the room. He didn’t want her to see him break down like he was about to, but he’d left her believing his one night fuck up was anything more than just that. And even worse than that, she didn’t even really seem to care. She didn’t show him a stitch of emotion. He would have been fucking gutted, worse than he was now, if she’d been with someone else like that.

It fucking hurt that the only thing she could say was that if he wanted something more from someone else he should be honest about it so they could stop. He thought about how she hadn’t texted him at all and he wondered if she’d already made up her mind about it before he messaged her. That thought, that she might’ve even considered stopping what they were doing, tore him up all over again.

He muffled his sobs by biting his sleeve, positive he hadn’t cried this hard since before he got to know her. It wouldn’t stop either. Even after his eyes dried up, the pain was still there, because all he could think about, still, was the way she didn't care. She wasn’t mad at him, she wasn’t fighting back her jealousy. There was just simply nothing, but at the same time, it told him everything. He’d only known she cared about him before because she trusted him and now… he had no clue if any of that trust still remained. And it was all his fault.

It took him a while to put himself back together, to be done crying long enough to wipe his eyes and come back to her. Even when he did, it was different. She was still awake, waiting for him when he returned, and she still cuddled up next to him and he still wrapped his arm around her like he always did, but it was different. There was an awful feeling in his chest that he couldn’t shake.

“I don’t want to be with someone.” He admitted, mostly to himself. Mostly to convince himself. The someone he wanted was her, but she was so far out of his reach. She didn’t like relationships, and he was the absolute jackass who fell for her anyways. “I was just drunk and did something stupid.”

“Okay.”

“But, um… if you…” The tears almost returned and he gave himself a moment to stop feeling everything so much. “If you wanted to be with someone, you would tell me too, right?”

She sighed, melting into him just the right way he was used to. The way he missed and craved and longed for. “You know I don’t… but yes. I would.”

It went on like that for a few nights. She still came over, things slowly started to piece themselves together again, but it all still nagged at her nonetheless. There was still the issue of Harry writing songs about someone she couldn’t wrap her head around. The selfish bits of her thought maybe they were about her, but she knew better. Harry didn’t have to waste his time on her. There were people in his league that he could learn to trust the same way he had with her. There were people that would open up to him fully without being terrified. People that could give him everything he wanted. He didn’t need her and she didn’t deserve him, and she did nothing but remind herself of both every single night. Even when wrapped up in his arms.

Everything about her had changed again. Going to Harry’s and sleeping in his bed didn’t put a smile on her face quite the way it used to. Will noticed it more than anyone. The way she never came out of her room when she wasn’t at work or at Harry’s. The quiet sobs he heard through the thin walls on nights when she did stay home.

Despite what Will might think, her sadness this time wasn’t because she felt utterly alone in the world anymore. It was because she finally found someone who didn’t make her feel so lonely, and she’d let her feelings for him and her feelings toward herself mess everything up.

It had hurt a lot less when she was empty and hopeless before Harry crashed right into her life.

So when Saturday finally came, and Will invited Harry over for dinner after a successful week in the studio, she really wished she could do anything else. Will was just trying to help, knowing Harry seemed to do the trick with getting Y/N into a better mood. Maybe she liked him a little bit more than everyone else, but either way Will had figured it was worth the try and Y/N knew that, so she didn’t argue too loud.

Around six in the evening, Y/N leaned against the counter while Will poured takeout onto plates, preparing for both his girlfriend and Harry to join them while James and Violet were gone for the weekend. The mere thought of having Harry over with considerably less people around had made her stomach twist into knots and her mind race all fucking day.

“Glad to see you out of your room. Glad to see you at all, actually.” Will said.

“Well, you offered dinner so…”

Will rolled his eyes, knowing better than trying to have a serious conversation with her. “I swear to god between you and Harry, I’m going to lose my damn mind.”

“What about Harry?” She asked, trying hard not to seem so obviously interested in Harry’s life while she organized fortune cookies into a single-file row.

“This entire week he’s been spewing out songs, crying about shit, spewing out more songs. He’s driving everyone nuts, but at least his album’s getting somewhere.”

“Oh,” she mumbled, stepping around the counter to help him start moving the platters of food to the table. While doing so, she thought about what Harry had to cry about that he wasn’t telling her. She’d been at his place almost every night the past week, the same days he was driving everyone nuts apparently, and he hadn’t said a word to her about it.

Maybe something really had drastically changed between them… and she still didn’t know how to fix it.

She dove even deeper into her thoughts when Harry was sitting right in front of her thirty minutes later. She watched him pick at his food and avoid looking at her, a completely different way about them both than the last time they’d been in these exact spots together. When they had stolen glances at each other and she’d stared at his hands a lot. Now it hurt too much to even look at him for five seconds at a time.

It was mostly him that was off. He didn’t look at her the same way he used to, like when he thought she wasn’t looking but she knew damn well he was. She’d missed the way he did that, which was something so unlike her it wouldn’t make sense if it wasn’t Harry. She didn’t like people looking at her.

As always, though, Harry was the only exception to every rule she’d ever set for herself.

But now he wasn’t doing all the things she loved. She didn’t catch his eyes one single fucking time while they ate dinner.

“So, Will said the album’s going well?” Sasha asked Harry amid the very obvious but very unexplainable tension in the dining room.

Will nodded before Harry said a word, and then dug into the front pocket of his jeans to pull out his phone. “I told her I would show her part of Golden, if that’s okay with you. Because it’s my favorite since we wrote it and recorded it in like five hours on Tuesday.”

That’s when Harry finally looked at her. When she didn’t even notice his gaze because she was too busy staring at the screen of Will’s phone next to her while he opened his recordings app. He looked at her long enough that it would usually get her attention, and so when she didn’t even give him the satisfaction, he hoped playing the song might get him a glance or, if he was being greedy, a smile from her.

Harry cleared his throat, “Sure.”

When the audio started, Will eagerly pressed his top volume button so that everyone could hear it loud and clear. It was a rough start of what was probably going to be an amazing song, Y/N knew that at the very least. And then there was a voice, a voice so distinctly Harry’s it made her head spin hearing him sing. Because she forgot he did that. She’d never really heard him before, at least not like this. She’d heard him like a whisper through the walls, and listened to some of his professionally recorded music before. This, on the other hand, was a lot more raw.

She listened as Will played two chopped bits of the song that pieced together really beautifully, although the lyrics she made out were the complete opposite of the upbeat melodies.

The first one seemed like the chorus, “You’re so golden, I'm out of my head, and I know that you're scared, because hearts get broken.”

The next one Will played hurt a little more. “I don’t wanna be alone, when it ends, don’t wanna let you know.”

But she didn’t know what to think. She was quiet while they all got loud. While Sasha asked him to play the recordings again because she liked it so much. The music was light, like driving down the highway along the coastline with the top down. A summery type of song even though the lyrics were as cold as winter.

She thought back to her daydreams and as much as she would have liked to indulge in the idea, she knew for sure now that there was absolutely no way he’d written a song about her. Maybe the lyrics made sense to their situation, but there was absolutely no way she’d be hearing it in front of their friends when he wouldn’t even give her a single glimpse at his writing journal. When he wouldn’t even talk to her about work or about whatever had been going on this entire week. If he wouldn't even do any of that when it was just the two of them, there was no way he’d be letting her listen to a song about her right in front of Will.

“S’not finished yet, but…” Harry shrugged, glancing Y/N’s direction again just to be left utterly disappointed. She was avoiding all of them, twisting her fork around in a mound of noodles she had yet to touch and he didn’t know what that meant. He didn’t know why she’d just heard a song so very obviously about her and she looked… upset.

Because, to her, the song was further proof that he was keeping something from her. That he was in love with someone while she had been in his bed leeching off of him. And she suddenly realized that’s what had changed between them.

She felt like she was using him again. Her guilt about everything they were doing might not have fully gone away, but it returned stronger than ever. That she was holding him back, even if he’d been honest before. He could be out there fixing his loneliness instead of spending nights with her. And it made her head hurt to think about.

To think she had really been letting herself fall for him only to be slapped in the face with the harsh reality that she wasn’t good enough and hadn’t ever been. And if he did, by some miracle, like her the way she’d wanted him to, it was just because of the way they’d gone about things. That it could have been anyone in her place and the outcome would be the same.

Even if the song was about her… why couldn’t he tell her any of that in person? He’d always been open with her, even when she wasn’t at times. Why did it feel like ever since he got back from New York two weeks ago that Harry was suddenly a fucking stranger to her?

“I have a headache.” She mumbled as her excuse to leave, long after the topic had shifted from Harry’s music to the wellbeing of Sasha’s mom. Even though she felt bad about it, she couldn’t stay at the table a second longer, so she took her dirty dishes to the kitchen to clean out and no one said a word to her, except for Will, who reminded her to take some ibuprofen. But especially not Harry. He was radio silent as she went back to bed.

As he finished up dinner and said his goodbyes to Will and Sasha, he left for the first time in a long time the same night. Left without waiting up for Will to go to his room. Left without knocking on her door, without joining her in bed. Crawling under her blanket. Breathing in her coconut shampoo for the millionth time.

He was leaving because it hurt too much to stay. It hurt ever since he came home and things weren’t the same. She didn’t need him or care about him anymore. It hurt when he looked in her eyes and he didn’t see himself reflected back in them. He saw nothing. And it hurt so fucking bad.

The studio was a little less cheery when all Harry could squeeze out was lovesick lyrics about Y/N. When he couldn’t finish songs on a rainy Tuesday morning because his heart hurt too much to even think about her.

It had been three whole nights without her, without even a text and it was making him crazy. He thought a little distance might do him some good, but it was having the opposite effect. She never texted him, and it killed him not to ask her to come over. It killed his sleep schedule as well.

“This random girl from New York has some kind of hold on you, huh?” Will asked when it was just the two of them, outside the little Los Angeles studio, buried in the brightest, green nature the western parts of the city had to offer. Will nodded over at Harry, silently pointing out the bags under his eyes and all the sadness that had poured out of his brain recently. The rain was a fitting backdrop behind Harry’s slouched shoulders and red eyes.

“It’s not…” Harry sighed, crossing his arms around himself while he stared out at the distant view of the Pacific. “I slept with her because of the one I’ve been writing about.”

“Oh.” Will seemed genuinely shocked. Mostly because… if it wasn’t her then he had no clue who had Harry so messed up. “So it’s a mystery girl you won’t tell me about?”

For the first time in… he had no clue how long, some semblance of a smile appeared on Harry’s face, even if it was exasperated and sarcastic. “No.”

“And it’s the same girl you said doesn't like you back?”

Harry nodded, not really willing to verbally admit to it right now. Back when he’d first told Will about her, he’d been hopeful that he was just misreading things. That she might actually have actually liked him. But now… All hope was lost.

He knew Y/N was bad with emotions but a little bit of anger or jealousy would have been better than nothing at all. The rain really was quite fitting.

“Does she even know that you like her?”

Harry sighed, a bit agitated because he knew Will was about to go on one of his advice rampages and he didn’t have the energy for it. “Not exactly. I feel like I’ve made it obvious though.”

“You’re really dumb, you know that?” Will stood after leaning against the outside wall of the studio and stepped closer to Harry near the edge of the roofed patio as he gave Will a very offended look over his shoulder. “You can’t just assume girls know things, especially if you’ve never actually said those three words. They can’t read minds.”

“Yeah but… what if I say them and it makes things worse?”

Will shook his head in disappointment, “People tend to regret the things they didn’t do or didn’t say more than the things they actually did, H.”

Harry was almost one hundred percent sure that if Will knew who he was giving Harry advice about, it would not at all be the same conversation. He wouldn’t be telling Harry to confess his undying love for Y/N. Will knew her better than Harry did. Hell, Will might tell him to get out while he can because clearly Y/N was going to do nothing but break his fucking heart.

And like magic, he heard her name coming out of Will like it had transferred from Harry’s brain to his friend’s mouth. He didn’t quite like the details that went along with her name, however.

“Why don’t we have a party at your place again? Like old times.” Harry scrunched his nose at the idea and Will huffed, leaning up against the wood railing next to Harry like he was defeated, “I gotta do something to get Y/N out of her room, man.” Then his voice got softer, “I thought she was doing better, but I can’t listen to her cry anymore.”

Harry’s entire body tensed up. Tears welled in his eyes without his permission. He knew she was crying because of him, whether or not he wanted to admit it. Maybe not for the same reasons he’d been crying recently, and even though imagining her alone in her room like that made the last bits of his heart finally break off, he was relieved to know she did feel something. That it hurt her too to be away from him.

“Besides,” Will turned to face Harry again, “Perfect opportunity to invite this girl so you can work your shit out.”

Harry hung his head in his hands, biting his tongue. Once he had the urge to just come out with the whole truth under control, Harry looked at him again. “Fine, but you’re in charge of snacks.

Taglist: @afterstylesmadeit @cxnyon-moon-deactivated20200417 @and-im-not-okay-with-it @chrryblsms @whydontharry @harryinsweatersandbandanas @idkthisisjustforfanfic @teddysoldbird @shawnsblue @thurhomish @theasstour @hufflepuff-always-and-forever @staceystoleyourheart @granolagrannie @defineharry @iambabyharry @1142590m @ashtondene @smokeinherperfume @cherryyharryy @mellamolayla @chrryblsms @cassiopeiaskies @sunflowerjens @detroitkiwis @brwnskin-bunnyteeth @cock-a-doodely-doo @strawberrycaramelmocha @meetmeinfleetwood @harriesgolden @rachkon @caritocp @sspidermanss @forestliz @grandfunnyemopainter @metalmerida @httpsmoony @iconicharry @amberlovestombrady @ainatirb-j @cheesecakebagels @cronias13 @dontyoucallhimbabby if you’d like to be added, go here :)

#harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles writing #onlyhuman

382 notes · View notes

artificialqueens · 3 years

Text

Tree House Kisses, Chapter 46/46 (Adorney) - Scorpio and Veronica

A/N: Well, here we are. After 46 chapters and over 4.5 years, we’ve finally come to the end of the road. Of course, this last chapter is dedicated to the wonderful, brilliant, amazing @artificialscorpio, who was the original author of this fic and who generously allowed me to first come onboard as a co-author, and then take over when they decided to take a break. I love you so much honey!!!

And of course, we’ve had some fantastic beta readers, especially the ones who helped with these last batch of chapters: @saiphl, @sillylittlecandycane and @tumble4rpdr. Thank you so so much to you guys, you’re the best!

Lastly, if you have ever liked, commented on, or interacted with this story in any way…I love you.

-Veronica

If you’re interested in the rest of this fic, you can click here for previous chapters or here if you’d rather read on AO3. xoxo!

Chapter Summary: Graduation! But what does the future hold…?

Chapter 46: Kaleidoscope

Courtney was very rapidly losing her grip on reality, hands buried in Adore’s hair, back arched, biting down on her lip so hard she tasted blood. The absolute gentleness of Adore’s mouth was making her insane. Even the way she held her thighs down, thumbs lightly stroking her skin, was soft and warm.

The best part, though, was that it was her. Her best friend. The deepest, truest love she’d ever felt, finally being expressed.

Adore.

No one in the history of the world had ever had a more fitting name, Courtney thought, as her fingers tangled deeper into Adore’s hair. And then, like slipping under the cool water on a hot day, her world went blurry, sounds distorted and amplified.

“Adore…” It was a plea. A chant. Her only remaining connection to the physical world, the last thread she held onto before finally letting go, eyes falling closed and body melting down into the wooden floor beneath her.

Her eyes fluttered as she gasped for oxygen. Adore had rolled off of her, was holding one of her hands.

“Courtney?” she asked, edging closer, breath warm on Courtney’s cheek.

Courtney turned towards her, eyes liquid. “Hmm?”

“Are you okay?” she asked. There was a hint of a smile in her voice, an amused sparkle in her eyes.

“Uh huh,” Courtney managed. She took Adore’s face in her hands, kissing her tenderly and then murmuring against her lips. “That was perfect, so perfect…”

“Yeah?” Adore asked, wrapping her into an embrace.

“Mmmh…” Courtney snuggled against her, eyes closed. She was fairly certain that she’d never felt better in her life, and she hugged Adore tightly. Maybe too tight, from the way she shifted.

“Sorry,” Courtney whispered, loosening her grip as much as she could bear.

“For what, baby?”

“For-” Courtney’s breath hitched.

She buried her face in Adore’s chest, unable to express the emotions that currently enveloped her. Adore rested a cheek against her head, stroking her bare back. Courtney couldn’t explain why for the life of her, but suddenly, there was a lump in her throat and tears in her eyes. She squeezed her eyes shut.

“Don’t let go.”

Adore had always been her best friend, the person she loved most in the world, but now, as perfect and wonderful as everything was, the thought of losing her was about a hundred times scarier. And even though Courtney finally knew that Adore felt the same way she did, part of her was still scared that the intensity of her feelings would scare her off.

“Don’t worry, I got you,” Adore murmured back softly. “I love you.”

It was the gentleness in her voice that finally allowed Courtney to let it all out. A tear began to make its way down Courtney’s cheek, and then another, and another, until she was full on sobbing, with no idea exactly why. It was like the combination of her earlier anxiety and fear and sadness and anger had catalyzed with the ecstatic joy and gratitude she was feeling now to create an unstoppable river of emotion, clinging to Adore like she was a life preserver.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know why I’m-”

“It’s okay. It’s okay,” Adore sniffled, and it was only then that Courtney realized that she was crying too.

What a perfect mess they both were, she thought, and started laughing through her tears, Adore joining in as she rocked her slowly, both of them crying until they were wrung out and exhausted, too tired to move. The last thing Courtney remembered before drifting off was Adore kissing the top of her head and pulling her impossibly close.

Adore slept peacefully, maybe better than she had in years, until she was woken by the sweet caress of Courtney’s fingers as she laced and unlaced them with her own, the early morning fog making everything cool and slightly damp, causing them both to burrow deeper into the sleeping bag.

A sleepy smile spread across her face, arm tightening around Courtney’s body, whispering, “Hey there…”

“G’morning,” Courtney murmured back, snuggling against her.

“How are you feeling?”

“Honestly? It’s all a bit hard to believe,” Courtney admitted. “I keep thinking I’m gonna wake up and it’ll all have been a dream.”

“Yeah.” Adore knew exactly what she meant. Things this good just didn’t happen--not to her. She tightened her grip on Courtney’s hand, squeezing her fingers, trying to reassure both of them that it was actually real.

“I do have a question for you, though.”

“Hit me.”

“Do you still think that we shouldn’t live together?” Courtney asked. Her tone was light and playful, but her eyes lowered slightly, and Adore could see that she was actually a bit unsure.

She smiled, shaking her head, pulling her in tight. “No, uh...I think that concern has like...resolved itself.”

“So then...the plan’s back on?” Courtney asked, a smile pulling at the corners of her mouth.

A week ago, Adore wanted to stab her own eyes out every time she thought about them as roommates. But now, she couldn’t think of anything more exciting.

“Plan’s back on. And hey, now we can save even more money by getting a one bedroom,” she said, adding quickly, “If you think that’s something you’d want.”

“Definitely!” Courtney giggled, laying her head back down on Adore’s shoulder.

They sighed, content to just be together, to enjoy the stillness of the dawn and their hearts beating in sync.

They must have drifted off again, because the next thing Adore knew, the sun was high in the sky and Bonnie was rapping on the wooden ladder, calling up to her to get her lazy ass up and come have some breakfast.

She rubbed her eyes, sitting up. “Uh, coming Ma! I’ll be down in a minute!”

“I guess I better go get ready too,” Courtney said softly, gazing up at her.

Adore looked over at her, struck once again by how absolutely beautiful she was. She nodded and leaned over to brush a kiss against her lips.

The rest of the morning was pure chaos. Adore’s aunts had cooked a big breakfast, which of course took ages longer to eat than it should have. Then there was the logistical nightmare of bathroom time. By the time she arrived for the ceremony, she was late, her classmates already lined up in alphabetical order and beginning to walk towards their seats.

She searched the line for Fame and Violet, racing towards them to find her own spot, nerves making her stomach twist itself into knots, the disgusting polyester of her graduation gown making her sweat.

She’d really been hoping to see Courtney before the ceremony began--after all, it was one thing to confess their feelings to each other in private, but how would she act in front of all their friends and classmates, with their families watching from the bleachers? She couldn’t even text her, because they’d been told in no uncertain terms that any phones out would be immediately confiscated. Apparently some people treated high school graduations like some kind of religious ritual.

She barely listened to the speeches. It was clear from the crowd’s laughter that Bob was killing it, and good for him, but she didn’t have the brainpower to keep up with that. Fame kept reaching over both Violet and Valerie Delacruz to stop her nervous hands from tearing apart the orchid she was supposed to hold, but it was no use. By the end of Principal Greene’s speech, it was a pile of scraps in her lap. She brushed the pieces into the grass, sighing, wishing it was over.

Finally, it was time to file across the stage, and Adore knew that it should have been an exciting moment for her, but all she could feel as her family cheered their hearts out was numb apprehension, preparing herself for the worst. She tried to seek out Courtney’s face in the crowd as she stepped off the stage, but unfortunately, she was sitting behind Brent Isaacson, an absolute tank of a football player, and thus completely invisible.

Adore groaned inwardly, knowing that this might be the hardest part of the whole day...sitting back in her seat listening to the names of all the rest of her graduating class as they filed across one by one. With no more orchid to play with, she instead gripped the sides of her folder chair and squeezed her eyes shut.

“Hey…” Fame leaned over (ignoring Violet’s irritated scoff) and whispered, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” Adore didn’t bother elaborating, so Fame gave her a pat on the thigh and straightened back up.

She did perk up when they started calling the J names, scanning through the line for Courtney, who looked tan and beautiful in deep scarlet lipstick, hair curled and spilling over her shoulders. Adore sat up as straight as she could, and when their eyes finally met, Courtney’s face broke out into a smile, giving Adore a secret little wave before turning to pay attention to the people directing them across the stage.

It should have made Adore feel better, but instead, it just made her anxiety skyrocket. She clapped for Courtney and then slumped back in her seat, passing the time by trying to think of lyrics to a song she was writing.

And then, at long last, it was over, everyone jumping up, some people throwing their stupid hats (even though they’d been told not to), a frenzy of activity as people hugged and cried and families swarmed down from the bleachers and onto the field with the graduates.

Adore looked around, but in the madness, couldn’t spot her anywhere.

“Can you believe we did it?” Willam was asking, as his arm slung around Violet’s shoulder, as Trinity and Fame squealed and hugged.

Adore’s throat felt a little dry, still scanning the crowd, when she felt someone throwing their arms around her from behind, practically knocking her over.

She laughed, first taking a moment to enjoy Courtney’s arms around her, sighing with relief before turning around and facing her.

“Hi. Congratulations,” she said softly.

“Same,” Courtney whispered back, gazing up into her eyes, hands still on her shoulders.

Adore swallowed, still unsure what to expect, but figured that at least, a hug was safe. She slipped her arms around Courtney’s waist, prepared to pull her in for a hug. But Courtney had other plans, taking Adore by the cheeks and kissing her right on the mouth.

Not just any kiss, but deep and slow, causing all the noise and the mayhem around them to fade away as Adore relished in the feel of her lips, warm and soft. In that moment, all of her panicking seemed insane--because of coursethis was how Courtney would break the news to their friends and family. Of course she wouldn’t care about gossip and prying eyes and snide comments. With that kiss, she was showing Adore yet again that she was number one, that nothing could stop them any longer.

That, as cliché and trite as it was in Principal Greene’s speech, today really was the first day of the rest of their lives.

A giddy laugh slipped from Adore’s lips as they parted, still too wrapped up in each other to pay attention to their friends gaping at them. Adore held Courtney close, giggling softly as she rested a forehead against hers.

“You know people are watching us,” Adore whispered.

“So?” Courtney whispered back, standing up on her tiptoes to press one more kiss to Adore’s lips.

“I told you she was bi!” Fame cried triumphantly, finally causing them to break their eye contact and look over at their friends. “Belli, you owe me five bucks!”

“Excuse me, you placed bets on us?” Adore asked, a hand on her hip. Beside her, Courtney seemed to find it all utterly amusing. “Does that mean you actually discussed this?”

“Yeah, bro,” Pearl said, patting her shoulder. She and Tatianna had apparently made their way over to the group while Adore was distracted by Courtney’s very friendly greeting. “Like...all the time.”

“Well…” Adore glanced over at Courtney, who was leaning a head on her shoulder, grinning from ear to ear, and realized that she couldn’t even pretend to be annoyed.

Every time Courtney so much as glanced at Adore, she felt like she was on top of the world. Of course, it was great to be at a graduation party with her family and friends, surrounded by so many people who cared about them both. But she would be lying if she said that anyone there made her feel half as excited as Adore’s hand in hers.

To anyone watching, she probably looked like a clingy mess, barely letting go of Adore’s hand, leaning against her shoulder, putting an arm around her waist, kissing her at every opportunity.

When she broke away for a few minutes to pose for family photos, Courtney felt a little ridiculous for missing her so much. She stood with some of her own family, making small talk about her summer plans, glancing over at Adore longingly every three seconds, waiting for her to come back.

Willam chose that moment to approach her, slinging an arm around her waist and asking, “What the fuck, cheerleader? I tell you my dick sucking secrets and now you're going to the dark side? Hope you have fun eating pussy.”

“Hi, Willam.” Courtney smiled sweetly at him, then said, “This is my grandmother, Muriel. Grandma, this is my friend Willam.”

Willam’s eyes widened and he backed away slowly, Muriel just shaking her head and muttering about kids these days and their filthy mouths. Courtney laughed to herself, eyes lighting up when she saw that Adore was finally heading back in her direction throwing her arms around her as if she’d been away at war for years.

“Hi,” Adore said, laughing as Courtney hugged her. “Missed me, huh?”

“Yes,” Courtney said, nuzzling into her neck.

Muriel cleared her throat, and Adore whispered, “Grandma’s not amused.”

“Yeah, what else is new?” Courtney whispered back, and they both giggled.

“Hey, there you are…” Pearl said, walking over to where Violet was sitting on Adore’s front steps, away from the party. She’d been searching for a place to smoke a cigarette, and when she spotted her, realized that she’d been absent for ages. “What’s up?”

“Nothing…”

“Oh yeah?” Pearl lit up, then slid into the step below her, looking up at her sullen face. “Seems like something.”

“Pearl, just…”

“What?”

“Go away,” Violet grumbled.

“Seriously, what’s wrong? Today’s supposed to be a happy day. No more high school!” Pearl pumped her fist in the air, lowering it slowly when she saw how unamused Violet was.

“Yeah, it’s great. I’m great. And it’s totally awesome that Adore’s tragic unrequited love for her best friend ended perfectly, while mine ended in disaster.” Violet kicked a stone off the step.

“You know-” Pearl began, but Violet cut her off.

“I don’t want to hear it, Pearl! I’m allowed to be fucking mad that she got everything she wanted and I got nothing! So don’t tell me that I should be celebrating, because I don’t fucking feel like it!”

Pearl held up her hands. “Actually, I was gonna say that I get it.”

Violet paused, eyes narrowing, still slightly out of breath from her rant, and asked, “You were?”

“Yeah. I mean, if life was fair, you’d have been rewarded for being brave enough to tell Fame how you felt all along.”

“Hmmph.”

“But also...you know, they just hooked up last night. It could still end in disaster.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” Violet demanded, eyes narrowed even more.

“I dunno...did it?”

“No.”

“Then no.”

Violet groaned, leaning back on her elbows. “This fucking sucks.”

“Yeah.” Pearl took one last drag of her cigarette before dropping it on the bricks, putting it out with the toe of her boot. “But, you know, you could look on the bright side.”

“Oh yeah? What’s the bright side, Polly-fucking-anna?”

“Now that you know for sure that nothing will happen with Fame, it frees you up to explore other...romantic opportunities.”

Violet snorted. “Oh yeah, like who? You?”

“You could do worse, you know.”

Violet stared at her for a few seconds, and Pearl thought there was a chance that she’d shove her off the steps, or laugh, or get even more annoyed than she already was. Instead, she shrugged.

“Alright.”

“Yeah? Really?”

“One date won’t kill me, right?”

Pearl grinned at her, shaking her head. “You won’t regret it.”

“I already do,” Violet retorted, with an exaggerated eye roll, only the light in her eyes and the slight quirk of her lips betraying her perfectly ironic tone.

“Augh, you bitch!” Adore shrieked, and Courtney laughed, fluttering her lashes innocently, pretending like she’d only gotten the frosting on Adore’s cheek by accident while giving her a bite of her red velvet cupcake.

“Oops, sorry,” Courtney said, licking the frosting off her own fingers as Adore tackled her onto the picnic blanket, both of them laughing happily.

“You guys are so cute,” Fame declared.

“Yeah, it’s disgusting,” Trinity added drily, and Tatianna laughed.

Courtney gazed up at Adore, about to go in for another kiss, when she stopped cold, Adore’s face stricken with guilt, pushing her off. Courtney turned in the direction where she was looking, and felt a lump in her throat.

Roy.

In Courtney’s ecstatic joy, she’d nearly forgotten about how awful their break-up had been--a mere two days earlier--but suddenly it all came rushing back, her pulse racing and stomach clenching.

“Shit,” she whispered softly, biting her lip.

She was frankly a bit surprised to see him here. From the look on his face when he’d stormed away, she’d expected for him to keep his distance for a long, long time.

“Are you gonna go talk to him?” Adore asked.

“Um…” Courtney knew she should, but she couldn’t will her limbs to move at the moment.

“You should talk to him,” Adore said firmly, taking the plate out of her hands. “I’ll save your cupcake.”

“Thanks, that was my number one concern right now,” Courtney said drily, and Adore chuckled.

“Stop stalling. Go ahead.”

Courtney heaved a sigh and stood up, brushing some crumbs off her skirt and walking slowly to the edge of the yard where Roy stood. The guilt made her stomach twist into knots, wondering what he would say, whether he was still so angry at her. She kept her eyes down, unable to look directly into his face, for fear of seeing that hatred on his face where once it had been nothing but love.

“Hi.”

“Hey,” he replied, seeming about as uncomfortable as she felt, shifting from one foot to the other. “Uh...congrats.”

“Thanks.”

There was a long pause, things more awkward between them than they’d ever been, before both of them began to speak at once.

“How are you-”

“Have you decided-”

They stopped, at the same time, Courtney daring to look up into his brown eyes for the first time, adding a sincere, “I’m sorry.”

Roy nodded, kicked at the edge of the grass.

“I really am,” she said. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine.”

Courtney bit her lip, offering a gentle, “You’re gonna find someone better than me, you know.”

“Oh, I have no doubt about that,” Roy replied, a wry smile on his face that finally gave Courtney some hope.

“Um...do you want something to eat?”

“No thanks. I just came by to say congratulations and…” he sighed, letting out a sad little chuckle. “Actually, I’m not totally sure why I came. A glutton for punishment, I guess.”

“Okay.” Courtney swallowed, the lump growing in her throat. “I’m really-”

“I’ll see you around, Court.” He turned to leave.

“Wait!” Courtney sniffled, eyes misty, as he turned back towards her. She stepped forward, knowing she needed to say something but at a complete loss for what. This was the person who’d been there for her through thick and thin for years. It just didn’t seem right to let him go without telling him how much she was going to miss him. But saying that, or even telling him the truth--that she would always, always love him--it suddenly seemed selfish. She didn’t have a right to unburden herself to him, not anymore. She would have to carry this particular burden alone.

“Yeah?”

“I just...do you think…” Courtney chewed on her lip, trying to stop the tears threatening to leak from her eyes. “Do you think we’ll ever be friends again?”

Roy was silent for a moment, and Courtney immediately regretted what she’d said. It seemed insane to think that after everything she put him through, she was even entitled to his friendship.

“I’m sorry, I just-” she stopped, voice breaking, realizing that there was probably nothing she could say to make things better.

“No, I get it,” he said, once again showing her kindness that she didn’t deserve. “I just...I don’t know. Maybe.”

She nodded hopefully, grateful for the ‘maybe,’ knowing that it was really the most she could ask for at the moment.

“Well, um…” Roy cleared his throat. “Have a good summer.”

“Yeah, you too.”

She stood there for awhile, watching him go, waiting until he got into his car and drove down the block before turning and heading back to Adore and the others, collapsing onto the picnic blanket with a groan.

“Was it awful?” Adore asked, letting Courtney settle with a head in her lap.

“Mmhmm.” Courtney pressed her cheek against Adore’s thigh, eyes closed, trying to think of all the things that she had to be grateful for at the moment. The scent of fresh-cut grass. The warm summer day. Adore’s hands in her hair, fingers running through the strands without Courtney even having to ask.

She knew she’d feel guilty about Roy for a long time--maybe forever. But as she opened her eyes and saw Adore gazing down at her, the bleached parts of her faded lavender hair lit up by the dappled sunlight filtering in through the trees above, she also knew that she’d done the right thing for all of them, as hard as it was.

Adore seemed to read her mind, a smile pulling on her full lips as she bent down to brush a kiss against Courtney’s forehead.

Adore strummed lightly on her guitar, softly picking out a melody as she watched Courtney pour over a huge selection of guidebooks and maps, armed with multicolored highlighters and post-its. The evening sun slanted in through the window, giving her a golden, ethereal glow that contrasted sharply with her mundane task of selecting attractions and routes for their road trip next week. Adore was certain that no one in history had ever looked so beautiful sticking post-its in a guide book or unfolding a map.

If it was up to Adore, she’d just start driving and wing it, but Courtney was taking the planning part very seriously, considering every road and making sure every detail would be perfect. She’d even scheduled in time for “spontaneous fun” so that they could have some days of just fucking around the way Adore wanted. The careful consideration was a sign of how much it mattered to her, and besides that, Adore found her serious planning face far too cute to waste her breath arguing.

“Look, if we take the pink route down,” Courtney said, tracing it along the map with her finger, “Then we can hit up the El Chorro Hot Springs on the way to Cabo.”

“Sounds great,” Adore said.

“And then we can do the blue route on the way back, see? We’ll go through La Paz both ways, so we can either do it before or after. Maybe after is better, so we know how much time we can stay?” She tapped a highlighter against her chin, considering the options.

“Awesome.” A lazy grin spread across Adore’s face as Courtney looked up, head tilted.

“Are you even listening?” she asked, brow arched, a look of amusement tinged with mild exasperation flashing across her face.

“Sort of,” Adore admitted. “But I trust you. There’s really only one thing I care about on this trip, anyway.”

“Zip-lining in Las Cañadas?” Courtney asked, holding up a pamphlet.

“No.”

Adore set down her guitar, then reached out and grasped Courtney by the wrist, pulling her over into her lap. Courtney giggled, delighted, nuzzling her nose and then kissing her gently.

“Playa del Amor?” Courtney then guessed, eyes shining.

“No,” Adore said again, shaking her head. She trailed her lips along Courtney’s jaw to her pulse point, where her teeth gently nipped at the sensitive flesh before licking her softly, making Courtney shiver.

“The rock paintings in Sierra de San Fran-” she stopped talking with a short gasp as Adore began to suck, her fingers tightening in her hair.

“Give up?” Adore whispered, feeling her nod, the pride of making her melt so quickly making Adore’s heart race. She lifted her head, looking straight into Courtney’s now glazed-over eyes to firmly say, “I don’t really care where we go, or what we do. I just care about being with you. Without having to pretend that I don’t...fucking love every inch of you.”

Adore had no doubt that it would be a great trip. How could it not be? The two of them frolicking on beaches, splashing in the warm water while ocean breezes whipped their hair around. She could already taste the salty kisses and feel the sand between their toes. She could imagine getting naughty while rubbing sunscreen on each other’s backs, and sharing dripping ice cream cones.

She didn’t even care that Courtney was going to make her hike on dusty trails and visit coldly air-conditioned museums. Those awful hikes would only make it more satisfying to curl up together at the end of the night. And in the museums, they could hold hands, fingers laced together, the cool air giving them an excuse to stand closer together.

All of it would be perfect, no matter what roads they drove along or what beachside motels they stopped in for the night. Because they’d be together, finally together, making Adore’s wildest dreams come true.

She continued to gaze at Courtney in the golden light, getting a look of pure love, of singular devotion, in return. It was a look that was both new and deeply familiar, a look that Adore had seen before so many times, but never truly understood until they’d confessed their most vulnerable feelings out loud.

How could she ever, ever have doubted their unbreakable bond? At that moment, she had no idea.

Courtney tilted her chin up, leaning in to press her lips to Adore’s once more, the kiss slow and perfect, a lovely taste of the unhurried summer days ahead.

They finally separated, gazing at each other with mirrored love-stuck expressions, eyes locked--until Courtney caught a glimpse of something over Adore’s shoulder, smile growing even more.

“What?” Adore turned her head, trying to see what captured her attention.

“Our names,” Courtney told her, pointing.

Adore chuckled slightly at the sight, the names they’d carved so many years ago with Bonnie’s screwdriver. The letters were crooked and wonky, scratched into the wood by what were clearly amateurish hands.

Courtney shifted, reaching into her pocket and pulling out a house key. She crawled over to the wall and began scratching something new, next to the original names.

“What are you doing?”

“You’ll see,” she sang, now hard at work.

When the letters started to form in the soft wood, Adore laughed again.

“How come your writing looks just as bad as when you were 8?”

“I never claimed to be an artist,” Courtney said, and Adore slipped her arms around her from behind, pressing a kiss to her bare shoulder, eyes closed as she breathed in the scent of her, of summer personified. When Courtney was finished, she moved aside to give Adore a better look.

Inside a crude carving of a heart (or at least, what was meant to be a heart) was the message:

AD + CJ 2007

“Do you like it?” Courtney asked, blowing a few strands of hair out of her eyes.

“It’s beautiful,” Adore proclaimed. And it was--imperfect, messy letters that Adore wouldn’t trade for anything, because it was them. She knew, looking at it, that she’d always treasure it, this permanent reminder of their love and hope and boundless joy.

“You’re beautiful,” Courtney countered with a soft kiss to her cheek.

Adore smiled at her.

Again.

Her face hurt from all the smiling.

Courtney rested her forearms on Adore’s shoulders, a matching smile spread across her face, before asking, “What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking...that our lives are gonna be awesome.”

“Obviously,” Courtney giggled, leaning forward to kiss her again.

Adore sighed happily into the kiss, then pulled back to look into her eyes, seeing the rosy, golden light of the sunset reflected back at her. More than that, she saw all the sunsets they were going to share together: this summer, this year, and beyond.

She’d never considered herself an optimist, not even close. But today, tonight, all she could see was a life of endless bliss stretched out before her.

The best part, though, was that it was already happening. Their beautiful life of love and joy and excitement had begun; she didn’t have to wait another second for it to start.

A/N 2: That’s all…for now. A sequel may be in the works. 👀 XOXOXOXO

11 notes · View notes

fictropes · 3 years

Text

oh boy i sure did write many words in 2020

Hi! I am copying people due to i want to. This is a lil (well... 63) round up of all the fics I wrote this year! Cos i’m very evil @ myself and writing fic and think i’m either not doing enough, or not doing it good enough, so i wanna full list of what I actually did so I can see my own accomplishments and can maybe... clap 4 myself for once. And honestly writing has helped MASSIVELY with my depression so.. that’s a bonus.

ALSO. this is a big huge thankyou to everyone! I only joined here + started writing in august and you’ve all been so so nice and welcoming and supportive <333 ;_; and I know they say write for yourself... but honestly peoples comments and excitement about my stuff has just been really, really lovely and I would never have written this much without all of you cheering me on<3.

so here is a list of everything i’ve written, organised by length and everything, so if you find yourself bored over the holidays... have a lil browse. (Sorry if u are on mobile and this doesn’t show as a read more)

Chaptered:

Can we try again? series (M) Complete - 35k - “Yeah, Phil. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Dan answers, softer than he’d wanted because he already knows what he’s about to do next.(or Dan doesn't turn up in 2009 and bumps into Phil 11 years later at a youtube convention 2. I like cupcakes, especially the gay variety (M) Complete - 30k - Firstly, Dan was 29. How was that a mature student?Secondly, his actual book was on the university fucking syllabus.(or the one in which Dan tries university again in a desperate attempt to prolong his procrastination, and his lecturer Phil is apparently something of a fan) 3. 7 Letters series (M) Complete - 9k - Your penpal can be the person you live with, actually. 4. There's Beans in Here (T) Complete - 2k - Phil has his wisdom teeth removed; Phil says many questionable things. 5. Roadtrip (E) Complete - 8k - “Exactly. I am right, as always.”“As always.” Dan agrees.Series 6. night shift, please (E) Wip - 27k I PROMISE THIS WILL COME BACK IN 2021 - Ten years and he’ll never get over how early he has to get up sometimes. In all honesty he prefers the night shift. 7. Still Not Calling it Fate (M) Wip - 14k - It’s become a bit of a thing, a bit of a thing that everyone he crosses paths with takes the piss out of him for 8. when i met you, a blue rush began (M) Complete - 5k - They end up in a small restaurant overlooking the sea, everything here is so blue. The sky, the sea, Phil’s eyes, the shirt he’s wearing buttoned up all the way to the top. 9. Luggage Tags (E) Complete - 2.5k - Just because it looks like your suitcase, it doesn't necessarily mean that it is. 10. Demon in the sack (E) Complete - 2.5k - Dan’s leg jiggles beneath his desk, knee hitting the table as he tries to force himself to hang up and ring the number he was supposed to ring— he doesn’t, he can’t. Long ( for me) oneshots (3k+) 11. Electronics and the Phil's who break them (M) Complete - 9k - The first time’s an accident, a proper accident— a Phil forgot how to hold his cup and now he’s watching his coffee seep into his keyboard type accident. 12. A Letter of Specifics (T) Complete - 4k - You'll know it's your soulmate because no one else on earth could be doing what they're doing. 13. The Benefits of A Weak Floor (M) Complete - 4k - He quite literally falls through Dan’s ceiling. 14. 10:35 on a Thursday (E) Complete - 3.7k - He’s tapping his pen against the paper, acting as though he isn’t asking Phil to take a sex quiz at 10:35am on a Thursday morning. 15. 2009, catboys (T) Complete - 3.2k - “You have your own ears, can’t have four.”“Why?” 16. Wrong Room (T) Complete - 3k - “Congratulations!’’ And he was expecting to hear a cry, or at least his mother telling him to be quiet because a certain baby was sleeping. Instead he heard the deep clear of a throat, a rustling of sheets. 2k-3k oneshots 17. Dinner with a stranger (T) Complete - 2.5k - @amazingphl hi! second year of doing this, sooo if anyone has nowhere to go for Christmas dinner I am once again offering..my flat (and by extension me) ;oSeries 18. Easy Lover (M) Complete - 2.4k - ''Yeah. We're always fine.'' It was always fine. It was always easy, despite always behind hard. 19. Cold Season (M) Complete - 2k - Dan is ill, insatiable and another word beginning with I. 1k-2k oneshots 20. Morose men on rooftops (T) Complete - 1.9k - “Dunno, maybe chatting up morose men on roofs is my thing.” He laughs, and it’s a nice noise. 21. Love with tongues of fire (T) Complete - 1.7k - So when Dan waltzed into the room, declaring his hunger Phil thought nothing of it. Just another night for another takeaway. 22. Your Rocks are my Rocks (T) Complete - 1.7k - Phil wants a new rock for Norman, Dan wants a peaceful life. 23. Joint Content (M) Complete - 1.6k - It started of a as a joke— a Joint Content joke. 24. 24/7 Fantasies (M) Complete - 1.5k - He thinks about Dan 24/7, constantly in two separate fantasies 25. A Conversation in Multiple Hallways (T) Complete - 1.5k - You're still here then? 26. Sharing Space (T) Complete - 1.5k - It's 2010 and dan has had a day. 27. The Obvious (T) Complete - 1.5k - "Can I use that?” He doesn’t wait for an answer, already scrawling it beneath the only three words he currently has— I love you. 28. I'm Thinking of Ending Things (T) Complete - 1.5k - Dan hears half a conversation, jumps to one whole conclusion. 29. Love Language of the Tactile (T) Complete - 1.4k - “I’m just— that’s a hypothetical.” Dan leans in this time, takes the touches that Phil always so freely gives away. “Can’t kiss in secret rooms if I leave.” 30. Don't Let the Self-Doubt Ruin You (T) Complete - 1.3k - “I’m here.” “Yeah, you’re here.” 31. Conflict Resolution (T) Complete - 1.3k - Following recent events we’ve decided it best we take a combative approach to your current workplace issues, we have booked you into a conflict resolution class this Thursday afternoon - we will not be paying you to attend. 32. when it comes to love (i want a slow hand) (E) Complete - 1.2k - And there it is, the refusal of anything in return. This is just for Dan and it always will be. 33. You're Still The one (T) Complete - 1.1k - “What’re you thinking about?” “You.” 34. Teach Me, Dad. (T) Complete - 1k - "Do you think I could be the next Mozart?” 35. The Logistics of a Clone (M) Complete - 1k - “I don’t think that’s a clone, though, like maybe more of a Doppelgänger.” Dan doesn’t know why they’re delving so deep into this, why he’s so damn bothered about being right. “It’s just literally you.” 36. All's fair in Love and Monopoly (T) Complete - 1k - Phil does not play by the rules, Dan lets him win anyway. Under 1k oneshots 37. Hide out in your heart (E) Complete - 0.9k - The second time Dan comes to visit it’s different. 38. Oh, there you are. (G) Complete - 0.9k - So after all this, after everything, he doesn’t think anything of it when someone else slips into his dms. 39. The Boy has Attitude (T) Complete - 0.9k - “You didn’t tell me you looked like this.”“Like what?”“This!” Phil’s waving a physical copy of the magazine in his face— so that’s where he’d been. 40. Hairties (and how not to use them) (M) Complete - 0.8k - “Why would you do that? Let us settle in, nice and slow and— gently does it.” 41. The Second Apartment. (T) Complete - 0.8k - It’s a stop-gap apartment, a we’re going to get our forever home after this. 42. Japan, 2019. (G) Complete - 0.8k - NO summary, just an obviously I was going to write this after phil's post 43. Doting Man (T) Complete - 0.7k - They’re both drunk, Phil more so— definitely more so.Series 44. Imposter (T) Complete - 0.7k - Among us is.. a bastard. 45. Ratemyprofessors.com (M) Complete - 0.7k - ‘Maybe if that Phil bloke from the English dep he’s always staring at fucked him he’d stop being so uptight’ 46. Failed Attempts (T) Complete - 0.7k - Dan enlists the help of Phil for his latest Instagram. 47. Bonus Prize (M) Complete - 0.7k - Phil Trash Number One 48. Feels like home (G) Complete - 0.7k - Home is where the Phil is. 49. We can make Forever work (T) Complete - 0.7k - It’s a moment of realising forever may sound too much to people, but we’ll get through everything together— we don’t have any other choice. 50. Scene in the Kitchen (T) Complete - 0.7k - New place 51. 4'11 (T) Complete - 0.6k - Dan is baby 52. Pillow Imprints (T) Complete - 0.6k - Dan is a menace, and Phil loves him anyway. 53. Parachute Jacket (T) Complete - 0.5k - Dan thinks Phil is obsessed with them Those few times I thougt I was goddamn Ri**ard S*ken 54. Home (G) Complete - 0.7k - It’s their forever home, because their actual forever lives inside of it. 55. secrets spoken in empty rooms (T) Complete - 1k - So he wants to be the same, but he wants Dan more. 56. Separately Together (T) Complete - 0.9k - Phil’s soft hands and even softer words. It gets harder to leave. Gets to the point where Dan turns off an alarm just so he misses the train. 57. It's not hard to fall (T) Complete - 0.7k - Still a little bit of your words I long to hear Some more Epistolary (apart from 7 letters) 58. A Play in One Act (T) Complete - 1.1k - [Manchester Piccadilly train-station, midday, October 19th, 2009.] 59. R/AITA (T) Complete - 0.8k - AM I THE ASSHOLE FOR MAKING MY BOYFRIEND BE A WORM?Series 60. Lonely Hearts (T) Complete - 1.8k - I will not say you were crying on the tube (out of politeness) 61. Conversations of the Lazy Kind (T) Complete - 1k - eggs? wot? Smells like eggs

50 notes · View notes

fanficshiddles · 4 years

Text

Caught in his web, Chapter 46

Chloe was curled up on Loki’s lap while they watched TV. It was mid-afternoon, but Loki was working from home that day and decided to finish early. Cause he could.

They’d tired Bear out previously, so he was sound asleep in his bed next to the sofa. Giving them some peace and quiet for an hour or two, if they were lucky. He was going through his mad phase.

Loki was absentmindedly stroking Chloe’s hair, she was revelling in the affection. While she enjoyed the sex and orgasms that Loki could give her, she really enjoyed moments like this. Where he was just cuddling her and being affectionate. It made her heart happy.

‘Are you meeting Georgie and Amanda this weekend?’ Loki asked quietly during the adverts.

Chloe shook her head. ‘Nah, no plans to. I think Georgie has family from Australia coming over for a few weeks so I might not see much of her out-with college… Why? Are you wanting rid of me?’ Chloe tilted her head right back to look at him.

Loki chuckled and gave her knee a squeeze. ‘Of course not, doll. Ben and David are coming over tomorrow, they’re staying for dinner and I wanted to make sure you were going to be around to join us.’ He smiled.

‘You’re not gonna be talking business all night though, are you?’ She grumbled.

‘No business talk.’ He grinned, rubbing her back.

‘Sounds good then.’ She snuggled back in against him.

‘I’m glad you think so.’ He purred, the hand on her knee slid upwards, underneath her skirt. She squirmed on his lap as he tickled up her inner thigh. ‘Spread your legs for me, doll.’

Chloe trembled at his tone and did as he asked. She almost melted into a puddle as his hand dove down into her knickers and he started playing with her softly. Relaxing into him, she closed her eyes and sighed in pleasure.

‘I could do this all night.’ Loki purred, nuzzling her cheek. He grinned when she whimpered and blushed. ‘Does that sound appealing to you, doll?’

She clutched at his shirt tightly and bit her lip. ‘Pleaseeee don’t torture me tonight.’ She whined.

Loki chuckled. ‘Aww, why not? That is my most favourite thing to do.’ He hummed, slowing his circling of her clit down with his thumb as two fingers slowly slid into her, rubbing against her g spot in a torturous manner.

‘Lokiiiii!’ She tried pushing down more on his fingers, but he didn’t go any faster. It was a delicious kind of torture that was slowly building. He knew how to do her so well, hitting all the right places. And he knew when she was close to cumming, so he slowed down even more and dragged it out further.

‘Please, Loki. Please.’ She begged.

‘Hmmm. I suppose since you do beg so prettily you should be rewarded.’ He squeezed her side as he picked up the pace with his fingers, going to town on her g spot and clit.

Chloe cried out as Loki made her cum. Her toes curled as she clenched her thighs together, trapping his hand, but it didn’t stop him from continuing to stimulate her through her orgasm. He slowed his movements down as her entire body shook in pleasure.

Pressing a kiss to her forehead, he kept stroking her softly. She whimpered and buried her face into his chest.

‘Do you want me to stop?’

‘No!’ She gasped, it felt far too good. It wasn’t too rough or fast, he was stroking her nicely. It felt so good.

Loki grinned and granted her wish. He kept it up for a while, slowly working up to another orgasm. And again, and again. But he never pushed her too hard by making her orgasm straight after another, he gave her time to come down from the high. He kept the stimulation at just the right tempo, nice and gentle.

Chloe felt like she was flying high, like the pleasure was deep down inside her, even in her bones. Part of her never wanted it to end.

Loki was quite enjoying himself. He enjoyed the way she was squirming in his lap, softly moaning and whimpering, it ramped up whenever he made her cum. The way her face was flushed red, forehead sweaty. But what he also loved, was how wet she was. And more was still flowing out of her, the longer her toyed with her.

When he slowed down and eventually stopped, she was so sensitive and still feeling extremely horny. He removed his hand from down her knickers and sucked his fingers clean, grinning wickedly at her as she blushed.

‘You taste delicious.’ He purred.

The following day, Chloe offered to make her carbonara for dinner. Loki jumped at the offer and sent Tania home early.

Loki circled his arms around Chloe and kissed the tip of her nose. ‘As a thank you for cooking dinner, I will personally see to it that you get plenty of orgasms at bed time tonight.’ He grinned.

‘Oh, you’ll personally see to it, will you? Who else would do it anyway?’ She grinned back up at him.

Loki opened his mouth, but then realised he hadn’t expected a back chat like that so for once didn’t know what to say. Chloe laughed and pulled away from his hold, checking they had everything in the cupboards for making the carbonara.

But Loki followed and kept trying to hold her, she managed to get her way round the kitchen and mentally took note of everything she needed. Even with Loki kissing her neck, she managed to stay focused.

‘Well, if you’re wanting carbonara you’re going to need to let me go to the shop. We don’t have the main ingredient, chicken!’ She giggled and tried escaping him again as his kissing became sloppy on her neck. But he grabbed her wrist and hauled her back into him.

‘There’s plenty of time. I’m sure we could get a quick one in first.’ He suggested, but then his mobile rang. He growled in annoyance, but had to take it.

Chloe patted his chest. ‘I won’t be long.’

‘Take Nelson if you want.’ Loki said quickly before answering.

‘It’s a nice day, I’ll walk and take Bear.’ Chloe called to him over her shoulder as she headed out.

Luckily their local shop was just a fifteen-minute walk away and it allowed well behaved dogs in. So Chloe called on Bear, clipped on his lead and headed out.

She was just at the end of the path when a car pulled up and David got out.

‘Hello, darling.’ He greeted and made his way over to her.

‘Hey, you’re nice and early.’ She said as David crouched down to pet an excitable Bear first.

‘Loki wanted to discuss a few things, told me that you said business is strictly off during dinner.’ David chuckled and stood up, giving Chloe a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

‘Nice that you greet the dog first.’ She teased.

‘Of course. Bear is too cute to resist.’ He winked at her and gave her shoulder a squeeze. ‘Where you off to?’

‘Nipping to the shop for a few things for dinner tonight. I won’t be too long, so you best get the business chat over with!’ Chloe said as she continued on.

‘I’ll make sure we’re all finished for your return.’ David laughed.

Chloe enjoyed her walk to the shop, it was a nice day and she just felt so at peace and happy with everything right now. She hadn’t been bothered by her father in a while, Stones was not a bother anymore. College was going well. Yep, she was in a pretty good place.

Even though she didn’t need much, she took a trolley anyway so Bear could lie in it while she did her shop. It wasn’t really allowed, but the shop owner adored Bear so made the exception for her. It was good socialisation for him too, as many people wanted to stop and speak to him.

She was queuing at the till when someone tapped her on the shoulder. She turned around to find Ben smiling down at her. ‘I thought that was you! The puppy in the trolley kind of gave it away, too.’ Ben chuckled.

‘Hi, Ben. Yeah, is a bit of a giveaway.’ She laughed.

‘How are you, love?’ Ben put his arm around her and kissed her cheek.

‘Good thanks, you?’

‘I’m very well. Excited to finally get to taste this chicken carbonara of yours.’ He grinned.

‘That’s exactly why I’m here. Needed ingredients.’

It was Chloe’s turn at the till, but Ben took the divider from her things and his away. ‘Allow me to get this for you.’

‘There’s no need.’

‘It would be my pleasure.’ He insisted.

‘Thank you… Loki pays for it anyway.’ She shrugged, laughing.

Ben laughed too. ‘Well, this one is on me anyway.’

Ben even took her shopping bags for her, like the perfect gentleman.

‘Hop in.’ He said as he walked over to his car.

‘I don’t mind walking.’

‘Ah come on. I insist. Besides, there’s a lot of bags here. And it would be silly since we’re both going to yours.’ He said as he put all the bags into the boot and then opened the passenger door for her.

‘True.’ She agreed and got in with Bear on her lap.

‘Hmm, I think we could likely help him out. We are due another shipment of girls in soon.’ Loki said as he and David were in his office, discussing business.

‘He is willing to pay big for good quality. And I mean big. We’re talking well into the thousands, just for one girl. Seems rather desperate, actually. He seems to have a thing for having twenty-four-hour slave girls, apparently the current one has grown too old at twenty-two.’ David said, cringing.

‘So, he might become a regular then.’ Loki chuckled.

‘Possibly.’ David nodded.

‘Alright, let’s see if he’s interested in going into business with us.’ Loki agreed, then turned to his laptop to type out an email to the man in question.

The two men went through to the kitchen and grabbed a drink. Loki checked his watch. ‘Hmm. Chloe should’ve been back by now, she was biting at the bit to get cooking.’ He frowned, it was after five.

‘I’m surprised Ben isn’t here yet either, you know what like. Never late that guy. What time did you tell him?’ David asked, sitting down on the stool at the island in the kitchen.

‘I said five.’ Loki hummed.

#caught in his web #loki #tom hiddleston #fan fiction

101 notes · View notes

nanami-says · 3 years

Text

Part IV (4/5): chapters 45~49

Chapter 45

[About talismans put on curses released for students to hunt during the group event]

“But even when exorcised with non-registered energy, it’ll burn red”

Not incorrect here, just pointing this bit out since it was mistranslated in the original explanation by Ichiji in ch. 40. (They kind of skipped the info about pre-registering cursed energy altogether.)

U:“It must be an outsider. Maybe an intruder?”

M:“Does that mean Master Tengen’s protective barrier isn’t working?”

G:“Intruder or not, this is an unexpected situation”

⇒ U:“Somewhere from the outside… Do you mean an intruder?”

[Mei Mei’s line]

G:“Whether it’s [someone] from the outside or from the inside, it doesn’t change that fact that those are unforeseen circumstances”.

Utahime was more asking and not actually stating anything here. Could go with “outsider” too but I wanted to capture the nuance of her still musing here better. As for Gakuganji, he wasn’t actually reiterating the line about “intruder” but “from the outside”! I.e. that it doesn’t matter if they came from the outside (of the barrier, I’m assuming), or from the inside.

[Gojou talking about the curtain]

“We’ll just rip it apart once it’s complete”

⇒ “So all you have to do is just rip it apart after it’s gone down”

Not wrong but Gojou sounded cockier here haha.

“In exchange for denying Satoru Gojo entrance, it gives everyone else free access”

⇒ “This is a [protective] barrier that, in exchange for denying ‘Gojou Satoru’ entrance, allows ‘everyone else’ besides that to enter and leave freely”

The original included more technical information, like Gojou calling it a “barrier” (結界/kekkai) even though normally the term used is “curtain” (帳/tobari). I’m not really sure on the specifics but, for example, the Jujutsu High is protected by Master Tengen’s “barrier” and when sorcerers want to conceal their fights from civilians they use a “curtain”.

Also, the original has “Gojou Satoru” and “everyone else” put in quotation marks so imo they should’ve signaled that somehow in the official English release as well.

“Why is there a cursed spirit here?”

Actually specifies “at Jujutsu High”.

“And whose curtain is that?”

“It’s probably coming from whomever is working with the cursed spirit”

Again, Megumi actually specifies that it’s “the curse user working(...)”.

[After Megumi interprets Inumaki’s riceball language with Kamo present]

“You can understand what he’s saying?”

“Does that matter right now? It might use expansion on us. We need to contact Gojo-sensei”

Megumi only says “domain” here (and it’s put in quotation marks again to show it’s a term) and not “domain expansion”. Also, he sounds more dismissive because the first line is closer to, “Something like that doesn’t matter right now, does it”.

[About Hanami’s speech]

“What the-- I can understand the meaning behind the noises it makes”

⇒ “What’s that-- Even though I don’t get what it’s saying from the sound, I can still understand the meaning”

Not incorrect, just wanted to propose something closer to the original wording.

“The forest, the sea, the sky… They’re crying from the tragedies they’ve withstood. We can no longer live in peace with humans”

⇒ (...) They’re crying how they cannot bear any more. Continued coexistence with humans is no longer possible.”

Imo the “can no longer coexist” referred to the forest, sky etc. Also just a slightly different nuance for the whole line, I suppose.

“They know that there are humans who care for the planet. But how useful is mere compassion?”

Hanami doesn’t really call it “mere compassion”, just “that compassion”, or, literally, “kindness”, “affection”.

Chapter 46

“We’ll have Inumaki stop it so we can keep some distance between us after we attack. We gotta do this if we’re gonna have a chance of getting out of the curtain. We need to find the principals.”

⇒ “Have Inumaki stop it, then we attack, and gain distance. Through a repeat of this, we’ll aim to get outside of the curtain and regroup with the principals”

Not incorrect per se but it sounded more like Kamo just describing their strategy to me.

Cont. on the next page.

“But how long can we keep this up. Inumaki’s cursed speech is losing effect. We can’t get in touch with the teachers either. It may even figure out a way to counter cursed speech.”

⇒ “But we don’t know when the current equilibrium will crumble. The effectiveness of cursed speech is bad as it is and we can’t even try and get in touch with the teachers. If he realises how to counter cursed speech, then it’s over.”

Lots of nuance lost here. First off, Kamo seems to have been talking about cursed speech’s low effectiveness in general, rather than referring to Inumaki getting weaker. And the line about the teachers actually said they “don’t even have a chance/space to contact” rather than that they’d already tried and failed.

“Finding Todo is a priority. Even Miwa would do at this point.”

⇒ “I’d like to join up with Todo, or at the very least Miwa, as soon as possible but....”

“Even Miwa” makes it sound like Kamo doesn’t really value her but he’s actually ranking her quite high, as she seems to be his next option after Toudou.

”The cursed speech he used wasn’t particularly strong, but his throat gave out. The enemy is that much stronger”

⇒ “Even though he wasn’t using a powerful spirit of language, Inumaki-senpai’s throat still got crushed. The difference in levels is just that huge”

When speaking about Inumaki here, Megumi actually didn’t refer to “cursed speech”, i.e. the technique, but “kotodama”, which’s what the technique uses, its main component, you could say. (“The spirit of language”, please refer to ch. 33 part IV (1/5). Also, as the phrase used in the last sentence is literally “higher rank”, imo it wasn’t so much about difference in pure strength by itself, as difference in levels (which will obviously also translate to difference in strength).

“You can’t cut me with such sword”

He literally calls it “this blunt sword” here.

“Its eye branches are its weak point”

Closer to, “are more fragile/brittle than the rest [of him]”.

[Maki about the new weapon she just switched to]

“But using this doesn’t feel right”

Actually “is vexing” or even “disgusting”, “revolting” etc., as, you know, it’s a weapon that used to belong to Getou, who once almost killed her. (Vol. 0)

Chapter 47

[About Maki’s special grade weapon]

“Indeed, that is not bad”

Actually “this is a good one”, a different nuance.

“Jujutsu sorcerers are interesting. And so emotional too. Every time one of their allies gets hurt, they leave new openings.”

⇒ “[It seems] jujutsu sorcerers are exceptionally compassionate.(...)”

What they translated as “interesting” was actually a descriptor for “compassionate”, which too imo is different from just “emotional”. All the possible translations given by the dictionary I checked are adverbs (highly, extremely, outstandingly, unusually, remarkably, exceptionally etc.), so imo, despite of how it was spaced in the original, it was intended as a single sentence.

[After Hanami explains how the bud that’s gotten lodged in Megumi’s body works]

“How nice of you to explain! You’re planning on killing me anyway, right?”

“I hear it’s more effective once explained”

This bit is interesting because while it’d been stated before that explaining a technique can lend it more power, Hanami is actually talking about speed here. I guess you could argue regarding the actual differences between speed vs. effectiveness but he did only say that “it'll work faster” this way.

[Hanami praising Maki]

“You have some nice moves”

Actually just “you can move well”, which imo has a slightly different nuance.

“I need to use everything I’ve got! Even if I get ripped apart”

⇒ “{Got to] Muster all of my cursed energy, even if it means my stomach/guts will rip!”

“I get ripped apart” sounds more drastic than the original imo.

Cont. onto.

“I choose who I save, unlike the others. I’m bearing the least burden. That’s why it’s inexcusable that I be the first to go down!”

⇒ “I’m not like the others. I choose the people to protect. I’m not [the one] bearing the most burden. That’s why (...)”

Again some of the nuance of the original seems to have been altered imo. I’m not 100% sure re the line about bearing burden but I think the meaning was probably closer to what I suggested. I am sure that he said “people to protect” and not “people to save” here, though.

Chapter 48

[Nishimiya about Toudou]

“If nothing else, you’re strong”

The phrase used here actually means “redeeming feature”. So you know, in Nishimiya’s eyes Toudou may suck overall but being strong is his only saving grace.

[Toudou to Megumi about Yuuji seeming different]

“You see it too. He’s beginning to spread his wings. He must find his own way. That is where he stands now.”

⇒ “So you’ve realised it too. When a person is beginning to spread their wings, it’s unforgiven for others to interfere. Itadori is in such a state right now”

Toudou was speaking rather loftily here, so maybe that’s why they seem to have gotten it slightly wrong but imo phrasing it as “must find his own way” didn’t really capture the original nuance of “it’s unforgiven for anyone else to so much as touch them”, which is what the second part of the sentence literally says. So it’s less emphasis on what Yuuji himself must do and more on what others aren’t allowed to do.

[Hanami after judging Toudou as weaker than himself]

“But he’s got a strong presence.”

⇒ “But this mysterious brazenness…”

Could also go with “impudence”, “shamelessness”, “boldness” etc. here haha.

[Hanami about Yuuji]

“You’re smart to close the distance. [I’ll commend you for that]

⇒ "You don't rush in recklessly. (...)"

...Literally the opposite meaning for this one. Hanami was commenting on Yuuji having attacked from the distance first.

“More agile than the girl! But his strength is disappointing”

⇒ “His instantaneous force surpasses the girl from before! (...)”

The word also means “explosiveness”, “explosive power”, so imo it pointed to Yuuji being able to unleash a lot of power in a short amount of time (although the actual output still fell short in Hanami’s opinion). Idk why they made it “agile” instead...

“Anger is a valuable trigger for a jujutsu sorcerer. There’ve been instances where people have been put on their heels after provoking an inferior opponent. The opposite is not good either. Mishandling cursed energy when angered, wastes your skills, and the fight will end in defeat.”

⇒ “‘Anger’ is an important trigger for jujutsu sorcerers. There are times when you can be beaten by a lower rank just because you’ve angered your opponent. Of course, the opposite is true as well. There are also times when you lose, because you became unable to draw out your true strength, with your cursed energy disrupted by anger”

They seem to have conveyed the nuance of Toudou’s lines here being a broader explanation this time but a lot of nuance has been lost nevertheless. Most importantly: “there are times” and not “there have’ve been instances”, this would be a different grammatical construction if the latter was the case; “the opposite is not good either” is just off; “wastes your skills” was imo unclear, it was closer to “can’t unleash your true power”.

“Your friend Fushiguro is hurt. And worst of all, our bonding time as best friends got interrupted, so I understand better than anyone why you would lose your cool.”

⇒ “Your friend got hurt, and worst of all, the honeymoon with me, your best friend, got interrupted as well. So I can understand rea~~~~~lly well why you’d be boiling with rage”

Once again Toudou using a much more poetic/lofty language in the original was flattened down in the official English release. (“Are boiling with rage” becoming “lose control”, freaking “honeymoon” - and yes, he actually used that word lol - becoming “bonding time”.)

More importantly though, there have been several cases before, when I mentioned that something is written one way but read differently, but didn’t go into the details. (For example, Sukuna’s way of referring to Megumi and Nobara in chapter 7 (refer to part I), or Nobara speaking about the Kyoto principal in ch. 37 (part IV 2/5). This is where I finally explain this phenomenon a bit more in-depth, using Toudou, who’s probably the best example.

If you've ever studied Japanese, you're probably familiar with furigana used over/beside kanji characters to indicate pronunciation. For example, the word “shin’yuu” which means best friend, would be written in kanji 親友, and then have しんゆう written over it in hiragana. Here, the actual word and the way it’s read match.

But in manga it's a fairly common practice to use furigana to provide an alternate reading. So you have 1) the actual text and 2) the reading.

1) can sometimes supply additional information as well (e.g. written as “technique” but pronounced as “talent”) but mostly it’s included to provide context and specify something to the reader that the characters would be naturally aware of, and 2) is what the character is actually saying out loud in the scene.

So in this scene Toudou doesn’t really say Fushiguro’s name out loud and only calls him “[your] friend/comrade", because it’d be obvious to Yuuji from the context whom he means here.

The same also applies most of the time when Toudou addresses Yuuji, like in the line that got translated as “Itadori, my friend”. In this case, the text is “Itadori” (to indicate to the reader that Toudou truly addresses him here) but what he is saying out loud here is “my friend”, which, btw, is actually said in English even in the original. So he’s literally calling him “mai furendo” here, haha. (In general, Toudou seems to opt for English equivalents quite frequently in the manga.)

Whelp, this ended up very long but basically, whenever I say that “it’s written like XX, but he actually says YY”, this is what I mean!

“But that anger is not for you. Suppress it for now”

⇒ “But that anger is too much for you. (...)”

Not 100% sure but this is probably closer to the original meaning. Also I just found the English translation really vague/unclear.

“Any more distractions?”

“Nope”

⇒ ”Did they disappear? Distractions"

“Yeah, not a single cloud [left]”

Aww, this isn’t incorrect but the wording in the original is just so lovely.

“Thank you so much. My best friend - Todo”

⇒ “(...), best friend!”

What I said for Toudou re text vs. pronounciation, except now it’s spreading, down to gratuitous English.

“For those who have experienced black flash, as compared to those who have not, their understanding of the essence of cursed energy is immeasurable.

⇒ “(...) the gap between their distance to the core of cursed energy is like heaven and earth”

Not incorrect but I really like the ring and the descriptiveness of the original wording.

Chapter 49

“You got to taste a sample of your cursed energy”

⇒ “You’ve grasped the ‘taste’ of cursed energy”

Imo not Yuuji’s own but cursed energy as a whole, as in that Yuuji has glimpsed what cursed energy truly is.

Extended cooking metaphor cont. onto the next page

“Until now, it’s like you’ve been putting ingredients that you’re not familiar with into a pot and cooking haphazardly”

Not incorrect per se but the original wording for the line about ingredients is “ingredients you never tasted yourself” and imo there’s a distinction.

“But with black flash, you’ve gained the ingredient that is cursed energy. As a chef, or in this case, a jujutsu sorcerer, you’re on a different level than you were just three seconds ago”

⇒ “But now through ‘black flash’ you’ve grasped the ‘taste’ of the ingredient that is cursed energy. As a chef, you’re now standing in a completely different dimension than the you from 3 seconds ago”

It wasn’t the “ingredient” (cursed energy) itself that was emphasised here but the ingredient’s “taste” (essence of cursed energy). Also Toudou is actually extrapolating on what he said on the previous page and he even reiterates his line from there (that mistakenly got translated as “you got to taste a sample of your cursed energy”). Overall, the text on those two pages just flowed better originally and wasn’t as disjointed. Also, this was another instance of text (jujutsu sorcerer) vs. pronunciation (chef)!

“Congratulations brother. You will be strong”

Closer to “you will be able to grow strong”. Also, re “brother” - it’s written as "super best/close friend” and spoken out loud as “brother” and again, it’s actually pronounced in English (“brazaa”). Heck, Toudou also actually says “congratulations” in English too haha.

[After Hanami has healed his own limb]

“It can heal itself?!”

“Cursed spirits are made from cursed energy”

Actually specifies that it’s the “bodies of cursed spirits” here.

“But its cursed energy is undoubtedly weakened. If we get its head, then it’s game over.”

⇒ “But it [healing] will infallibly/certainly shave its cursed energy. And if you crush its head, it’s game over”

Again, imo a more general explanation on how self-healing works for cursed spirits.

“I need to try a little harder”

⇒ “It seems it’ll be better to get serious to an extent”

Just to make sure that the nuance here is that Hanami had been holding back before.

“What a heavy hit! It’s not quite as heavy as the black flash hit from earlier. However, individually they have enough power to hurt me”

⇒ “Heavy! Not to the extent of the previous black flash hit but each [hit] has enough power to deal damage to me with certainty”

Imo the official release was a bit unclear, so I tried to tweak the wording. Especially the “individually” bit - imo it was intended to mean “each”. In other words, the two’s attacks, while not as powerful as black flash, are still potent enough to actually hurt Hanami with each respective hit.

[After Hanami dissolves his technique and Yuuji and Toudou's footing disappears]

“Our footing! We underestimated it! With this amount of mass I thought it was manipulating physical branches with its cursed energy. But it’s the embodiment of cursed energy! It made the illusion real with just its cursed energy. That’s a special grade for you!”

⇒ ”(...) We let our guards down! (...) Everything was materialised and manifested just with his cursed energy!! (...)”

Like in the instance above, imo the way the official release translated it was really unclear, especially the line about “making illusion real”, which actually was just “manifest”. (Again, “materialisation” is actually “realisation” but I used the former to make it easier to understand.)

(jp)

“You should be more true to yourself, Hanami”

“I’m not trying to be anything else”

“I’m not saying you’re lying. I know why you fight. But as long as we’re fighting, why not try to enjoy it?”

⇒ ”Hanami, you know, you should be more honest”

“I don’t think I’m pretending”

“It’s not like I’m calling you a liar or anything and I know what’s the objective you fight for. But I think you should try to enjoy the process - the present called ‘fight’ - more”

The meaning was there but I wanted to propose something closer to the original wording because it’s interesting to me how Mahito switches between very simple phrases and more complicated thought processes (like here he explicitly compares “objective”/”goal” and “the process”).

[After Hanami asks whether Mahito enjoys fighting]

“The pleasure I feel while fighting didn’t motivate me much until recently”

⇒ “It’s not until recently that the joy, that the pleasure, I feel at the height of a fight have become my motive”

So it’s not like they didn’t motive him much but that they only recently became his motive/incentive to fight!! Quite a significant distinction imo.

“Before I realised, all the deceit, cheating and killing left me satiated. Just like humans eat, sleep and rape, curses manifest instinctive behaviors as well”

⇒ “When I realised - deceit, tricking, killing - I’ve already been filled/satisfied without being aware of it. The same way humans eat, sleep and transgress/violate - for curses those are probably their instincts”

Not 100% sure about the first sentence but it’s something similar. Emphasis mine for the second sentence. In other words, it’s precisely deceit, tricking and killing that Mahito sees as curses’ instincts. Also the word that they translated as “rape” does indeed mean that as well, but imo it could’ve just as well been pointing to one of its more broader meanings, like “to violate” or “commit [crimes]”.

“We might have gained reasoning, but that doesn’t mean we should deny our impulses”

Imo “reason” instead of “reasoning” and “fight against our instincts” (since the same word gets used) instead of “deny our impulses”. Especially since they translate it as “reason” in the next panel.

“A spirit is blend of impulse and reason”

⇒ “A soul is a blend of instinct and reason”

Emphasis mine. I genuinely have no clue why the official release suddenly translated it differently here... Everywhere else they’d also gone with “soul” whenever the word appeared before, which, needless to say, happened in almost every other instance of Mahito talking about his technique and/or philosophy.

“You all right, brother?”

“No problem!”

“There you go!” ⇒ “Splendid!”

Also means “excellent”, another example where in the original Toudou is using a lofty expression and which sadly got a cut in the official release. He’s so proud of everything that Yuuji does, okay. :”( The first two are fine.

[to part iv (5/5)]

#jujutsu kaisen #jjktranslation #jjk #jjk translation #jujutsukaisen

32 notes · View notes

bemused-writer · 4 years

Text

VNC Chapter 46 Analysis

Mochizuki's ability to pack so much into a singular chapter is truly a gift. In this chapter we get a lot of Dominique's POV, which was awesome, but pretty dreary. However, I don't think any of us can blame her; she once told Noé she worried about him blaming himself for what happened to Louis, but she never mentioned how much she is still bearing a great burden from the very same incident.

There's a lot to unpack in this sentence alone, but it reveals a lot about Dominique's mindset. In past chapters, we've already seen that she harbors a great deal of self-doubt; she isn't living up to her family's expectations and she's convinced the man she loves would prefer a different kind of woman, i.e. someone more like Jeanne. However, we see here that her self-doubt is actually better characterized as self-loathing. She doesn't consider herself suitable for Noé whatsoever. So, what is it that she thinks Louis has that she doesn't? She's gone to a lot of trouble to imitate him, after all. I think we can break her perceived failings into the following: 1) She can't be with Noé 24/7. I think a large part of why she thinks Louis would have been a better partner for Noé than herself is because they already lived together. He could have traveled with Noé to Paris, lived with him there, helped him handle Vanitas, Murr, and even Teacher. Basically, she assumes Louis would be ever present at Noé's side in a way she cannot. 2) An outgoing nature/ease of communication. Dominique believes that Noé had an easier time talking to Louis than he does with her. She saw Louis as smart and capable rather than meek and timid. What she doesn't realize is that Noé and Louis actually had a ton of communication problems and that Louis was incredibly withdrawn. I suppose that's the kind of misconstrued takeaway one has when dealing with someone they idolize and another they're crushing on. She doesn't have the clearest sense of their flaws. (Side note: I think it's kind of amusing that she just assumes Louis would be shorter than Noé. I mean, he was taller than him at the time...) So, even before Louis's death Dominique was dealing with some pretty heavy self-esteem issues, but we really see just how far they've developed over the years. The days following his death seem to really have taken a final toll:

Now, this is something I've wondered about for a while, but it's sad to have it confirmed. As I mentioned, Dominique was worried Noé blamed himself, but the truth of it is Dominique blames herself for Louis's death. The reason she's worried about Noé is because she sincerely believes that the only person worthy of this blame is herself. She thinks that if she had simply kept quiet, Louis would still be alive. Judging by how timid Dominique still is at home, I think this philosophy has followed her for her whole life: stay quiet and out of the way and things will be fine. It's completely different from how she is around Noé, but that's because she is trying to put on a persona she thinks Noé would prefer over her actual personality, i.e. Louis's personality. Of course, Noé cares about Dominique because she's one of his best friends; she doesn't need to do this to herself, but she doesn't realize that. She's fixated on this idea of adjusting herself until Noé sees her in the right light and her family accepts her. Unfortunately, we're dealing with a trio whose communication skills are epically bad. Louis asks Dominique to give Noé the chest "when the time is right." How is she supposed to know when that is? And how could he actually expect Noé to put those stakes to use? But the thing is that none of these characters are thinking clearly. Louis was a young person stuck on the idea that he was cursed and going to die. He refused to talk about it to his friends because, well, what could they do about it? Dominique is ridden with insecurities and couldn't be expected to handle the responsibility Louis gave her, and Noé cared far too much about Louis to fulfill his wish. The only person who could have stepped in and sorted any of this out was Teacher, but he's the one who allowed all of it to happen in the first place. So, Dominique does the only thing she can think to do at the time: stay at Noé's side.

Dominique is terrified here; I really think this might be the first time she's ever stood up to Veronica and it's only because of how urgent things are. We've seen in the present that Veronica has absolutely no qualms going toe-to-toe with her own sister or with publicly shaming her in front of the entire vampiric court. This is not a kind woman. And we see that she was no better in the past. Dominique is frightened of her, and then Veronica gives all of her fears and anxieties the final push they need to plague her for the rest of her life. She takes malignant glee at how her sister has been left in the dark (as if this is Dominique's fault; maybe her family should actually try telling her things...), mocks her, and then reveals her birth itself was a shame on the family.

Cruel though this is, it does remind me of a question I've had for a little while now: how do vampires procreate exactly? Apparently, they have to give birth on a full moon, which is already pretty different from their human counterparts. Now we hear that twins are unlucky because they "steal more life." What, exactly, does that mean? I suspect it doesn't simply imply that it makes the pregnancy more strenuous. Could it be that vampires have to very literally give up some of their lifespan to create offspring? Do they have to perform some kind of sacrifice? But it can't be wholly different from humans; otherwise we wouldn't have dhampirs. Well, we'll undoubtedly learn more about that at some point, but it is an interesting concept. Anyway, Dominique asks Veronica why her parents chose her over Louis. I mean, it's a valid question and it's a moment Veronica could have used to compliment her sister, or possibly console her in some way, so naturally she does the opposite. She basically says it was a whim of their father's. Now, I'm not totally sure I believe that. I had believed Louis was taken away because he was a curse bearer, but Veronica is making it sound like the problem was simply that he was a twin. If what Veronica says is true, that means Louis became a curse bearer after the fact and I think I have a sneaking suspicion of how. Teacher said it would be a waste to simply kill one of the babies and let's not kid ourselves by thinking he had purely good intentions here. He told Louis he wanted to see what choices he made. Well, for an experiment to work, you have to actually have some variable you're testing. I think Teacher (who probably has some connection to Charlatan) cursed Louis himself, perhaps to see how long he would last under those kinds of conditions and how he would try to change his fate. Also, I think it's important to point out that Veronica said "If news that your mother had given birth to twins had gotten out, it would have tarnished the name of de Sade." That pretty heavily implies that Veronica and Dominique do not have the same mother, which would make sense. It also raises yet another question of how vampiric society handles things like marriage. To me, it sounds like their father is the head of de Sade second only to Teacher. Does he have multiple wives? Concubines? If women have to give some of their life to have children, it might make sense not to have too many children with one woman, and if the aristocracy is determined to expand the family name, the easiest way of doing that would be by having several children. The de Sades are clearly concerned with preserving the family name and with having enough heirs to handle... I'm not sure. Antoine seems to be in charge of diplomacy, Veronica is a Beastia, and Dominique... What is it that she's supposed to be doing? What is it that they think she's failing at so badly? After Veronica's big reveal, Dominique wonders if Louis knew the truth and to be honest, I don't know if he was ever told, but I wouldn't be surprised if he was. Teacher wasn't exactly gentle with him and I'm sure he would be curious to see how he handled the knowledge that Dominique was very literally chosen over him. She is his twin sister and she can never know. By all accounts, Louis would have been justified in being cruel to her, but he never was; he was always kind and patient, and I think that says more about Louis than anything else ever will. If he hadn't undergone the horrors Teacher chose for him, he probably would have been a much more carefree person.

This scene is just sad on so many levels. Veronica didn't have to plant the seed of doubt in Dominique's mind that Louis would have been a better heir than her. She didn't have to make her wonder if Louis was simply a better candidate for everything she's ever wanted: better at being a de Sade, better for Noé, better for everyone. And poor Noé has no idea he accidentally fed into this. He was just as traumatized as Dominique and, well, she does look a lot like Louis. Who could blame him for mistaking them when he has a raging fever and is in mourning? But the damage is done. Dominique is convinced that Noé would have preferred Louis over her, and this has no doubt fed into her misery over her unrequited love for him as well. Perhaps, on some level, she believes that if she had been Louis, Noé would love her already. Also, this means that Vanitas's jab in volume two is all the more hurtful:

This always read to me as Vanitas saying Dominique was just a stand in for what Noé really wants and while it is true that Noé has thought of Louis on occasion when he's with Dominique, I don't think it's fair to say he wishes she were him. They're twins and they were both Noé's childhood friends. It would be normal for him to miss Louis in such a scenario. But Vanitas is very good at hitting where it hurts and he did so very well with Dominique. If there's one good thing that could come of this arc, I hope it's that Dominique realizes how much Noé cares about her. He goes to her rescue immediately:

We only see Noé get this serious when it has to do with Dominique or Louis. These are the two people he cares for most; he's not messing around when it comes to her rescue. Also, I really like that he doesn't bother with negotiating or any of that. He goes straight to the fighting and it's great; negotiation isn't going to work with this kid. With anyone else, this would be a great tactic, but Misha has a book and is willing to fight dirty. I really feel like this is going to turn into one of those: "If you'd just told me this in advance things could have been different!" moments that Noé and Vanitas have had in the past.

The text bubble really makes it look like Vanitas is just shouting this in the middle of the restaurant. I find that amusing, but wouldn't it make more sense to be thinking this...? XD But! Everyone is piecing things together way faster this arc and that is kind of a relief. Vanitas isn't going to be taken off guard by Noé acting strangely; he knows exactly what kind of damage Misha can do. Furthermore, Noé swiftly puts it together that Misha has done something to Dominique's name. If nothing else, at least everyone is in the know on how bad things are. 8D At any rate, Noé's attacks swiftly come to a halt when Misha uses the book on him. The technique is the same that Vanitas used on him during the Bal Masqué. It seems to primarily function as a stun, but it looks like Misha's was designed to pack a heavier punch because Noé can't move at all while he was able to somewhat when Vanitas used it. Of course, the main difference is that Vanitas didn't want to do permanent damage to Noé; he just needed to prevent him from hindering his job. Misha on the other hand has no qualms about killing a woman, so he definitely wouldn't be opposed to wreaking more havoc still on yet another individual. It's interesting that last chapter we got to see Noé tell Vanitas he's glad he's the person he is now because he's now getting a very fast intro into just how awful Vanitas could have been if he'd been inclined to. These books have the power to seal a vampire's fate, for better or worse. Misha has chosen for the worse.

"Only this book." I suppose that means he didn't inherit the name "Vanitas." (Did Vanitas really inherit it or did he just steal it?) It could also be a way of emphasizing he wasn't given Vanitas's book; just this one.

Amazing how at the end of their introductions, Vanitas is the one who looks decidedly mad, but it's Misha who is infinitely crazier. I guess first impressions aren't everything. 8D

Okay, he says he's kidding, but the only thing he could possibly be joking about is that he's an "average human being," which, let's be honest, sounded a lot like a lie when Vanitas said it, too. I don't think either of them are "average" human beings. Something about being kin to the blue moon changed them and I think we're eventually going to learn more about what and how.

Okay, so here's the thing. Misha may be "evil" but he's not an evil genius. There have been flaws in his plan from the get go, notably that he thought he could fully control Dominique to do anything that would put Noé in danger because I'm pretty sure his original plan went something like this: Dominique asks Noé to follow her. She leads him to Misha. Noé and Misha sit down for a chat. Noé agrees to drink Vanitas's blood and comes back with info. Only, that isn't how it went and it's unlikely this backup plan will work either. Misha is making a lot of assumptions here: 1) Noé has no qualms about drinking Vanitas's blood (as, perhaps, most vampires wouldn't), 2) Threatening Dominique won't lead to massive repercussions, 3) Vanitas himself won't be involved to mess this plan up, 4) Noé is actually capable enough as an Archiviste to locate specific information. Well, none of that is true. Noé has massive reservations about drinking Vanitas's blood, he absolutely will not forgive this kid for threatening Dominique, Vanitas is probably already on his way, and Noé is more likely to lose himself in Vanitas's memories and wind up traumatized than come back with any useful information. 8D I mean, maybe Noé does drink Vanitas's blood because I do believe he'd do just about anything to save Dominique, but I think it's more likely that Vanitas himself will show up and put a wrench in this entire affair. I guess we're going to find out the answer to that pretty swiftly with the next chapter. Anyway, I'm going to toss in a few predictions for this arc and see if any of them stick: Noé and Vanitas actually have to tell each other some of their dark backstories (in other words, Vanitas has to explain who "Father" is and Noé has to explain Louis), Noé doesn't drink Vanitas's blood, Dominique is lost to Noé, but not because she dies. Rather, I think it's more likely these two are going to have a whole lot of revelations about each other and the sheer awkward factor/shame will cause them to need time apart.

#vanitas no carte #vnc meta #vnc spoilers #Bemused's post #long post

183 notes · View notes

turtle-paced · 4 years

Text

A:tLA Re-Watch: Fine-Toothed Comb Edition

Another long recap. Seriously, I doubt they’ll all be this long, especially when we hit some of the season one standalone episodes.

Book 1, Chapter 2 - The Avatar Returns

(0:33) Picking up with the new material in the intro to every episode in the series from this point forward. Aang’s status as the Avatar was shown to the viewer, but not internally revealed (to anyone but Zuko). Now the intro’s just going “yeah Aang’s the Avatar.”

(0:43) Again we’ve got that super-efficient outline of the series’ premise. Fire Nation attacking, Avatar needed, Aang not yet up to the job.

(0:46) But where the first episode panned over that empty spire while Katara said she had hope that the Avatar would return, now we pan up over Aang on top of that spire whille Katara says that she believes in Aang.

(2:34) Aang and Katara return under the still-visible signal flare to a decidedly mixed reaction from the village. While the kids are thrilled Aang’s back, the adults are much less keen.

(3:02) The discussion about intentional signalling of the Fire Navy vs. unintentional signalling of the Fire Navy boils down to the cold hard fact that Aang and Katara did something risky, and now the whole village is in danger.

(3:06) Aang, sweetheart that he is, steps in to deflect blame from Katara.

(3:20) The conflict between Katara and Sokka from the first episode reappears, since they never actually resolved it. Sokka thinks that Aang’s deliberately drawing the Fire Nation to them, and that the village is better off if Aang leaves. Katara thinks that Aang is not a spy, and objects to the hostility shown to a stranger. And neither of them are still wholly right or wholly wrong.

More broadly speaking, however, we’ve got two major protagonists in a serious conflict. Avatar lets its major characters disagree and argue according to their priorities. Here, doing right by others is a priority for Katara in a way it isn’t for Sokka. Likewise, her desire to find a waterbending teacher is completely alien to her brother. Sokka’s priority is Katara, and his words show how he’s gone about living up to the duty placed on him by their father.

Speaking of, that’s a heavy thing to lay on a kid. Sokka had to pick up adult duties too. Sokka himself might not see it at this point, but this is one of the most serious ways the Water Tribe patriarchy’s screwed him. Rather than the adult women taking charge and letting Sokka learn and grow, it became Sokka’s responsibility to do the man stuff. (Worth mentioning that the problems with the gendered division of labour hit Katara even earlier, but that’s a discussion for season three. It’s messed up whichever way you slice it.)

(3:29) Katara’s arguments (that Aang has brought fun to the South Pole) build naturally on the events of the previous episode, because we’ve seen Aang interacting with the kids in the village and making everyone smile.

(3:47) Gran-Gran, who despite the patriarchy is still clearly an authority figure, does not side with Katara. Thus far, the show’s done a lot from Katara’s PoV. Her PoV is the central PoV to this point, giving us the background, following the disruption to her routine with her brother as she brings her guest to the village. But being passionate and sympathetic doesn’t automatically get people with their own interests to change their minds. And though we’re being put in Katara’s shoes, to sympathise with her over Sokka right now, it’s real hard to totally condemn Sokka and Gran-Gran for wanting the village and Katara herself to stay as safe as possible. At the very least, they’re not arbitrarily throwing Aang out into what they know to be a hostile environment. They’ve got established reasons.

(3:52) Learning to waterbend matters so much to Katara that she’s willing to drop everything and leave home on a sour note and in a moment of temper. It’s worth noting here that she’s the one driving this, literally leading Aang over to Appa.

(4:10) Sokka asks if Katara would really choose Aang over her own tribe and family, and Katara stops, conflicted. One of the sweetest things over the course of season one (and something I’ll discuss more next episode) is how this ceases to be a conflict.

(4:14) And Aang, who is such a sweetheart, doesn’t want to force Katara to make this sort of choice. This is the starting point: no matter how immediate their connection, a friendship of a few days is not worth cutting off family and community for, not in Aang’s mind.

(4:30) “Guess I’ll go back home and look for the airbenders.” Try not to think of the hypothetical where Aang was alone when he arrived at the Southern Air Temple.

(4:45) Appa continues to refuse to fly, and continues to build up to the punchline.

(5:21) Katara’s angry rejection of her grandmother’s attempts to comfort her show in miniature something that’s very important for the storytelling in this series: emotional inertia and continuity. The action of this scene resolved with Aang’s departure, but Katara’s own feelings about what this represented for her desire to learn did not. They carry over to her interactions with other characters and inform her actions until she finally gets the resolution she was after (at the end of the season).

The writers account for their characters’ experiences and longstanding motivations. These things might take a backseat to whatever’s immediately demanding their attention, but it’s there, and it influences how they act and react from scene to scene. This is harder than it sounds with the episodic structure and multiple writers. The writing in this series was a team effort.

(5:50) Aang and Appa take a break in a random ice formation. “Yeah, I liked her too,” says Aang. Sad on first watch, but in context of ‘The Storm’ and indeed the series finale, Aang was feeling alienated from his peers since the reveal he’s the Avatar, and he still walked away from that sort of peer relationship and a high chance of wacky adventures. Because he knew that the course of action Katara was proposing would hurt her.

When Yangchen tells Aang that selfless duty calls for him to sacrifice his own spiritual needs, we know he’s capable of doing so, because right from the start we’ve seen him sacrifice his needs for others. (Though I’ll save discussion of what sacrificing his own spiritual needs actually means for much, much later.)

(6:00) The action in these episodes leading up to this conflict is so simple, but it’s the result of such nice, neat plotting, all informed by what these characters want and what these characters know. To recap:

Zuko was looking for the Avatar. The beam of light from the iceberg caught his attention, but he didn’t have an exact location, so he started looking around more carefully, a thing that takes time. In that time, Aang (who was avoiding information about the war) and Katara (who’s nowhere near as paranoid about Fire Nation attacks as her brother) did something important to them - had fun. In the process they took an inadvisable risk and attracted attention. This gave Zuko the information he needed and resulted in him heading towards the village. Meanwhile, the characters who are more worried about Fire Nation attacks took an action that made sense for them in asking Aang to leave. But since that happened out of Zuko’s sight, he doesn’t know that, and keeps heading for the village.

Not hideously complicated. But everyone’s actions make sense from their own perspective.

Also, shout out to Aang here, who just learned the Fire Nation are the aggressors in a hundred-year war, who just got kicked out of the village, and who, upon seeing the Fire Nation advancing on the village, goes right back to help without a second thought.

(6:07) Brief montage of Sokka and Zuko each preparing for a fight. Aside from the fact that it’s pretty grotesque for these teenage boys to be gearing up for war, the contrast between Zuko receiving assistance in putting on armour and Sokka kneeling alone in a tiny tent to prepare himself is striking. One of these parties has more resources than the other.

(6:44) Sokka stands alone on the wall of the village. Thus far he’s been suspicious and sexist, and arguably takes himself and his duties too seriously, but at crunch time he gives his duties the appropriate weight.

(7:20) Zuko’s ship emerges from the mist, towering over Sokka. The shot and his repeated “Oh, man,” does quite a bit to convey just how futile fighting back is here.

(7:39) She might not be fighting, but Katara’s not sitting around doing nothing. Aside from rescuing this kid from a tumble into breaking ice, she’s also been trying to get the elders in the village out of the way.

(8:29) Zuko and henchmen appear at the top of the gangplank, fully armoured. Very pointy. Most of Zuko’s soldiers throughout this scene have their faceplates down. From the Water Tribe’s perspective, these people are terrifying and mostly faceless.

(8:42) Having faced down a ship a hell of a lot bigger than he is, knowing that this is probably going to be useless, Sokka tries to physically defend his village anyway. He’s quickly and rather comically kicked away into a snowbank.

(8:59) And after that scary introduction, crashing into the village, neatly dispatching Sokka, we get, “Where are you hiding him?”

It’s easily missable, precisely because Zuko’s crashed into the village and is legitimately, intentionally terrifying our protagonists, but. Think about how Azula would have opened her speech here. Zuko’s a scary antagonist here, but he’s still socially awkward, forgetting to mention who he’s looking for, or why, or even who he himself is. He’s gone straight to the point. Social niceties? Never heard of ‘em! (Pro tip: ‘breaking the ice’ is supposed to be a metaphor.) Sometimes Zuko communicates beautifully. Other times…

(9:08) Zuko roughly grabs Gran-Gran and reveals one of his mistaken assumptions. He’s looking for an old Avatar. Not that he’s outright said ‘I am looking for the Avatar.’

(9:24) Sokka makes another attempt at defending his village from the guy who’s crashed into it, assaulted Sokka’s grandmother, and brandished fire in their general direction. Once again Zuko deals with him easily enough, but -

(9:31) As Sokka rolls to his feet and throws his boomerang, it stops being quite so comical. The viewers know what a boomerang does. So does Sokka, we can see that from his expression. Zuko, however, dismisses it.

(9:55) Then, even after Sokka’s been knocked over for the third time in two minutes, the boomerang comes back and clocks Zuko in the back of the head. Giving Sokka a boomerang as his weapon of choice was a great idea. An unconventional weapon for an unconventional thinker.

(10:06) The undignified boomerang thing is followed up by Aang’s dynamic entrance on a penguin, bowling Zuko right off his feet with his helmet flying into the air and landing comically on his butt.

When we get other villains, we’ll see how unusual this treatment is. Avatar has plenty of humour in it, but the threat that its villains pose is a serious matter. The show certainly doesn’t pretend that Zuko did nothing wrong - explicitly points out that he did plenty wrong, multiple times, in fact - but it does use humour to distinguish several of Zuko’s villainous efforts from those typical of other longstanding antagonists.

(10:28) Sokka’s utterly deadpan “Hi, Aang. Thanks for coming” is just delightful to me.

(10:44) Aang makes a show of airbending snow onto the soldiers and asks, “Looking for me?” This is either a remarkably insightful guess from Aang or another minor inconsistency. How does Aang know who or what Zuko is looking for? Has he been in earshot since the nine-minute mark? If so, what’s he been doing? Looking for a penguin?

I tend to run on the ‘remarkably insightful guess’ assumption, which reconciles the potential inconsistency. Aang knows he’s the Avatar, after all. Yet again I’m going to reference what he knows from ‘The Storm’, where he absolutely knew that the monks were getting worried about a war.

(10:49) Zuko finally says the word “Avatar” and connects the two parts of the series’ title for us. The Avatar is the last airbender. And vice versa. It is, however, a reveal to Katara and Sokka. Cut to commercial break.

(10:57) Aang and Zuko start circling each other, Zuko helpfully informing the viewers that he’s been on the Avatar hunt for literal years.

(11:04) When Zuko calls Aang a child, Aang does not take offence. (Like I said last episode, Aang knows he’s a kid.) He does, however, point out that Zuko’s a teenager. So. By this point, the viewer knows that Zuko has been looking for the Avatar for years. The viewer knows how long the Avatar’s been missing. The viewer knows that Zuko expected the Avatar to be an extremely powerful master of all elements. The viewer knows that Zuko needs to capture the Avatar, that his honour depends on it.

Halfway through episode two, the viewer’s got the bare bones of what they need to start asking some pointed questions about Zuko’s backstory.

(11:13) At this point of the show, Aang is clearly uncomfortable fighting in earnest. He doesn’t strike back and simply defends.

(11:17) The potential of fire to hurt people nearby through accidents is clear as Aang hears the villagers behind him scream at his deflection. So Aang finishes dissipating the fireball and then offers to go with Zuko, on condition that Zuko leaves the village alone.

(11:28) Zuko nods. He stops attacking and leaves without another word to the villagers or another threatening gesture, Aang in custody. This is very initial setup for Zuko’s eventual heel face turn. He’s scary and destructive, his goals are not friendly to the people trying to fight invaders in their homeland, and he doesn’t seem to see the issue with roughing people up a bit and breaking their stuff in pursuit of his goals, but he is, at least, true to his word. He isn’t actively malicious.

The setup’s also more for the viewer than for Aang, Katara, and Sokka right now. Together with the PoV of Zuko that we’ve already had, we’re starting to get the picture of an awkward, angry, teenager crashing into things both literally and metaphorically, hurting others and himself, in the unhealthy pursuit of something that may or may not be just the Avatar.

(11:45) I love that Aang asks Katara to look after Appa for him. He thinks of Appa’s wellbeing and trusts Katara with it.

(11:48) Zuko’s order to set a course to the Fire Nation, with the accompanying line “I’m going home,” is yet another thing that hurts more on the rewatch.

(11:58) Aang’s brave face visibly fails as the gangway draws back up after him. Commercial break #2!

(12:10) Establishing shot of the damage done to the Water Tribe village. There’s the hole in the ice shelf. Hole in their one actual building. Knocked-over tents. We cut to the villagers doing a bit of manual labour to get their homes and structures back in working order.

(12:31) Katara looks out to sea and says that they have to go after the ship and free Aang. The ship that just crashed into their village. To fight the guy who just kicked Sokka’s ass. Because it’s the right thing to do.

Meanwhile, in the background, Sokka’s walking back and forth with stuff in his arms.

(12:45) Katara continues to argue that they owe Aang for his help, and that she and Sokka should both go. Which is when the punchline kicks in - Sokka’s been loading a canoe so they could. While he and Katara are on the same page as far as saving Aang goes, this is probably the first instance of Sokka’s developing “plan guy” tendencies. Practical stuff.

(12:53) Episode two and already there are “he is not my boyfriend!” jokes. It’s also something that makes Katara and Sokka’s relationship feel like an actual sibling relationship, with the genuine and open affection transitioning into giving each other a hard time in seconds.

(12:59) Gran-Gran comes up behind Katara and Sokka and pulls exactly the same joke as Sokka did seconds ago. Surprise, she doesn’t disapprove! She wants to help her grandchildren rescue Aang! Looks like everyone was convinced that Aang wasn’t a spy, and that everyone broadly accepts Katara’s argument that the tribe owes Aang.

(13:26) Then there’s the whole Avatar thing. As Gran-Gran says, the Avatar is the world’s only chance. This is now an issue bigger than their village. “You both found him for a reason. Now your destinies are intertwined with his,” she says.

Narratively, the same principle applies to Zuko as well. He could have been sailing anywhere, but he’s right there in the South Pole, looking in the right direction at the right time.

(13:37) Katara points out that there’s no way they’re going to catch a warship with a canoe. For the vast majority of the series, transport is a consistent concern as the characters travel from place to place. The advantages and disadvantages of flying show up. The difficult of walking places shows up. Right here we start with the fact that the canoe’s just not going to cut it. Which is when Appa shows up from after his nap.

(13:53) “This staff will make an excellent gift for my father,” Zuko says. Which is our first indirect reference to Ozai. It also shows that Zuko is thinking of pleasing his father.

Note also that Zuko calls it a staff and Aang does not correct him.

(14:07) Zuko rather rudely shoves Aang’s glider at Iroh with a brusque order to take it to his quarters; Iroh rather more politely asks the nearest soldier to do it instead. Again, Iroh doesn’t go along with Zuko’s poor treatment of him - Iroh’s not there to fetch and carry for Zuko.

(14:25) “I guess you’ve never fought an airbender before.” Aang can get his head around the fact that there aren’t many airbenders around any more. He was planning to go look for more airbenders earlier. He used his airbending to prove his identity to Zuko. But what he hasn’t grasped just yet is why there are no airbenders left.

(14:31) Aang bets he could take both Fire Nation guards out with both hands tied behind his back. He can! But what we see in the next minute or so is Aang’s real forte - evasion. He knocks both guards over with an airbending-charged sneeze and runs for it.

(14:53) As we see, the guard Aang knocks over is back on his feet in seconds, none the worse for wear. This is a kids’ show, you can’t be having the protagonists killing people right and left, but this is integrated into Aang’s fighting style and character to the benefit of the story as a whole. Right now it’s making for a tense fight scene, one Aang versus a shipful of Fire Nation soldiers.

(15:09) Katara is very much the positive reinforcement sort of person. Rather than Sokka’s cynicism, she tries to encourage Appa into flying, both because Aang needs them and because she believes in Appa.

(15:29) Meanwhile, Sokka recalls the one prompt Aang gave Appa to fly, more than a day ago. Good listening, Sokka.

(15:38) Appa flies!

(15:42) And cynical Sokka shouts with excitement. Sokka does have that sense of wonder Katara does, but a bit more deeply buried.

(15:46) Katara gives him an excellent told-you-so look (siblings!). Even though Sokka tries to play it cool for her after his loss of composure, he still gives another little smile and eager look down for the viewer afterwards. Commercial break!

(16:08) Aang’s response to armed men facing him down with swords in a narrow corridor is to ask them if they’ve seen his staff (he’s still calling it a staff, no hinting at the glider function), and then to avoid fighting them even as he pursues his objective. Ditto the firebender who tries to blast him. The most Aang does is knock people over.

(16:34) Aang bursts in on Iroh’s quarters, where Iroh is asleep. Sure is convenient that the best fighter on the ship by a large margin is taking a nap right through this alarm and all this shouting in echoey metal corridors, isn’t it.

I mean, I don’t know that Iroh is faking. It’s just awfully coincidental, that’s all.

(16:39) Check the angle on the door here. Look at how little space there is behind it.

(16:47) It turns out that Zuko was in that tiny, tiny space the viewer couldn’t see. He also shuts the door to limit Aang’s ability to evade.

(16:58) We get a decent shot of Zuko’s quarters here. He has a nice table for meditation. He’s got some hangings, a reed mat on the floor, and some hangings. And right on the edge of the shot, he’s got a pair of swords.

(17:09) Aang still hasn’t thrown a punch or made any sort of attempt to strike back. Again, he knocked over those first two guards with a sneeze, not an actual blow.

(17:33) Ah, the counteroffensive from Aang. Wrapping an opponent in a wall hanging. Zuko burns through it - the first thing in his room that he’s actually set on fire, by the way, despite throwing a lot of fireballs around over wall hangings and flammable floor coverings.

(17:41) Aang finally actually counterattacks, launching a mattress at Zuko to knock him into a wall. Twice. And then he runs again while Zuko’s stunned and prone. It looks to me like Aang is not at all comfortable with hitting people directly.

(18:03) Hope spot as Aang launches his glider to escape.

(18:05) Literally brought down by Zuko leaping out into the air, well above the metal deck of his ship. If Zuko hadn’t caught Aang, he was going splat. Complete disregard for his own safety. And somehow not the most ridiculously unsafe thing he does in the process of chasing Aang this season.

It’s one thing to tell us that Zuko’s been hunting the Avatar for years. It’s another to show us Zuko jumping out of what, the third storey? in order to get a single hand on Aang’s heel as he flies away.

(18:26) Socially awkward Zuko rears his head again as he actually gets distracted for a second by Appa’s appearance.

(18:49) Repeated fireballs from Zuko succeed in knocking Aang into polar waters.

(19:00) Mysterious glowing kicks in, as well as the theme music, and Aang comes to the surface waterbending.

(19:20) And in the Avatar state, Aang simply knocks all the soldiers off the deck. Doesn’t look like the kid whose most aggressive moves in the past three minutes were sneezing and throwing a mattress, does it?

(19:45) The mysterious glowing taps Aang right out of energy, leaving Katara, Sokka and Appa to finish the rescue here.

(19:58) Sokka goes to pick up Aang’s staff and runs into Zuko, who wasted no time getting out of the cold water and climbing up the side of the ship. This time, however, Sokka’s got the advantage. He pokes Zuko in the face with the end of the staff and knocks him back again.

(20:17) Katara tries waterbending in combat for the first time. It doesn’t go so well, accidentally freezing Sokka to the deck. She turns to try the move she just worked out on the Fire Nation soldiers rushing her with spears, because she’s got some real strong nerves.

(20:44) Now that everyone’s on the bison and there are no soldiers on deck, Iroh wanders out. First thing he does is go help Zuko back onto the deck.

(20:56) Iroh matches Zuko’s fireball in an attempt to shoot Appa down.

(21:05) And who could have foreseen it, but Aang deflects it! Right into the side of a glacier.

(21:25) If Iroh was trying to impress on Zuko that Aang’s just a child, he missed the mark. (Given Zuko’s relationship with Azula…) Zuko points out that kid or not, Aang just buried their ship. We leave our antagonists as Zuko orders the ship dug out and the Avatar followed.

(21:43) Meanwhile, somewhere in the sky, Katara has questions for Aang. Her first relate to waterbending, how? Aang, however, has no conscious knowledge of waterbending. So even though he’s the Avatar, he’s on similar footing to Katara when it comes to that particular skill.

(21:55) More seriously, Katara wants to know why Aang didn’t tell them he was the Avatar, and Aang’s answer “because I never wanted to be” is an important one. We’ve seen his courage and his selflessness. We can reason out that it’s not the actual saving of the day that he minds.

Aang doesn’t want the responsibility. He wants to be free.

(22:17) Katara gently points out that the entire world needs the Avatar to end the war. Aang doesn’t know how he’s going to do it. He’s got no idea how to tackle this problem (nor much emotional preparednesss to do so).

(22:23) In response to Aang’s despondence, Katara sets out the general outline of what Aang needs to do, and therefore the plan for the rest of the series. Aang has to master water, then earth, then fire. The plan for the rest of the season is to learn waterbending.

(22:31) “We could learn [waterbending] together!” Aang says. Again, the full context of this is that Aang (very much an extrovert) was abruptly excluded from airbending games by his same-age friends when they found out he was the Avatar. That’s the other thing Aang doesn’t want about being the Avatar - being set apart from others. We can start to see that in his eagerness to learn with Katara.

(22:33) As for Sokka, what he gets out of the trip is basically some fighting. Unlike Aang and Katara, he doesn’t have a clearly defined end goal here. Nor a clearly defined role in the group as yet.

(22:50) Aang insists that they stop a few places before going to learn waterbending. Mostly these places involve riding large animals. Again we’ve got the good and the bad here - Aang needs to make time for himself and it’s good that he makes time for himself, but he also can’t duck his responsibilities forever. Whether or not he wanted those responsibilities in the first place.

#a:tla #fine toothed comb edition

52 notes · View notes