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a-simple-writers-journal · 5 years

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An open letter to my dear friend

I am so proud of you, you did it and you got your degree and I could not be more proud of you.

Just over seven years ago (on a side note holy shit we’ve been friends for 7 years) I met you and my life has been better since.

Your life too actually.

The girl i met seven years ago is not the girl i know to this day although she kinda resembles her in a very familiar way.

If only she could see what you became; maybe she wouldn’t be hurting herself or wanting to kill herself everyday.

But again that’s each of our stories, maybe you wouldn’t be where you are if you did not struggle for maybe everyone’s struggle is what builds them to be the success they are. Maybe.

And maybe that’s some bull shit optimism too, who knows haha.

You are so much more than the seven year ago girl thought you could be and even wanted to be.

And I am so SO proud of you. You beat all the odds.

But it brings up the question what would I say or even show that girl? The seven year ago self?

In the midst of therapy and bettering myself as an almost 22 year old i wanna ask myself the question a therapist could ask me: What would you tell your 15 year old self, what would I tell my 16 year old friend from what i know now about us?

Firstly and foremost, don’t fucking kill yourself or even try, put the blades down baby girl. You have so much to fucking live for.

Secondly, this shit sucks and I know it does but trust me you will become a more humble and understanding person because of it, you’ll be the safe place for someone. The safe place you wish was there for you right now.

Thirdly, give yourself a fucking break. You are literally perfect the way you are and you don’t need to change a fucking thing. Stop being your worst critic and start being your own damn cheerleader.

Fourthly, EAT! Eat whatever the fuck you want. You have the metabolism for it and you should not spend your days where you should be learning all you can for free(trust me paying for it gets expensive and you’ll wish you learned it for free), feeling in a fog and feeling faint cause you want to continue to see your fucking ribs. Your weight doesn’t define you. Eat a whole cake just for yourself and tell your mom to keep her mouth shut about what you’re eating and your weight cause its her insecurity not yours.

Fifthly, that guy you’re dating right now. Dump his ass. Yeah he’s older, yeah he lusts after you, yeah he’s the only boyfriend you thought you could get after everything with Joe but god damn lift your self esteem off the floor and open your damn eyes to the boys who were literally begging to go out with you (you’ll find out later the boy you liked actually liked you back a lot). Also if a guy that old is going after a girl your age there’s a reason he can’t get girls his own damn age. Think about that. Your low standards won’t help you later on trust me.

Sixth, get fucking help. All that shit you’re holding in, everything that’s happening to you, get help. Help is not a sign of weakness. It takes the greatest strength to admit that you can no longer do it on your own. Ask. Ask someone. Don’t let it build up.

And finally, love yourself. Love yourself and all your quirks and even love your mental illnesses cause they make you the way you are and that is something that is perfect and uniquely you. Don’t be shy. Don’t shy away from being yourself no matter what.

And if you can do all of that, you’ll see you can be in so much of a better place and that there is a future for you, maybe not the one you think you planned but there is a future and it’s fantastic and I can’t wait for you to grow up to see it and feel it and feel real love and real heartbreak and all the stupid emotions that come with being a teenager. Just be you.

Julia Mackinnon June 7 2019

#self love #letter #help #mental health #open letter #proud #so proud #future #my future #advice #advice to you #advice to myself

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a-simple-writers-journal · 5 years

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My Journey

I’m not entirely sure if this is an essay or a poem or whatever. All I know is that its creative and from the heart and that’s all that matters.

Abuse destroys relationships.

Most people who inflict self harm is because they don’t feel safe be it their home or in themselves.

I’ve been seeing S for just over a month now but my last session was probably one of the most ground breaking for me and my journey. We talked about family and in that came talking about my relationship with my brother and my mother. The things above are ones that S said to me as she tried to learn the roots of my depression, anxiety and my self harm as a teenager and they really hit home for me.

I never thought I had a bad childhood nor did I think I had bad parents or that I was abused, and I still don’t think I had bad parents but i do realize now I was abused. When people think of the word abuse in childhood they always go to blame the parents first. That’s not where it stemmed from, they never laid a hand on me and only ever once spanked my brother’s bottom not even that hard and my mother felt so terrible that she cried with him in her lap profusely apologizing. My own father grew up with my grandfather being abusive and in the end helped my grandmother move out with two teenage boys after she finally had enough. They didn’t tolerate violence and if I cried then they’d get involved and heavily scold my brother.

I still to this day don’t think of myself as a victim even with everything that I’ve been through. I don’t see myself as a victim. I’m not a victim. I did everything I could to fight back in each time the abuse would roll in whether it would be physical from my brother or verbal from my mother or even financial and verbal and sexual from my ex.... I am not a victim and I never want the pity looks that victims get. I pride myself on being a strong independent person but was it the abuse that made me that way? I’m not entirely sure honestly. Did each form of abuse lead to another? Was there a trail or breadcrumbs that lead me from one to another? I can never truly know but what I do know is the fact that it was abuse.

These things hit home so hard though. The abuse I got from my brother ended up destroying our relationship. I moved out of the house because of it at 18. A moment that hits straight in my heart and S said was incredibly cruel was when i had gone home to have dinner with my mother after moving out and he had not joined us but when I was starting to leave when my mom was out of earshot he raised his hand to me as if to hit me and I flinched and he laughed.... He laughed and said “Good. You’re still scared of me.” Now that I think of it S is right about it being cruel. It was to show he still had power to make me feel fear and fear for my safety... That’s exactly what abuse is. You live in fear.

Now the other part about what S said was that those who self harm usually do it because they don’t feel safe whether it be in their home due to physical harm or they don’t feel safe being themselves (i.e homosexuality etc.) S also understood when I told them that I used it to help control and stop my anxiety attacks. They said it was my way of shocking and resetting my system and body and how it was probably helpful at the time but not healthy obviously.

Now she gave me the list of signs and actions that are abusive. We were talking about family and she gave me the list so that I don’t have to make the same mistakes again, so that those never happen in my new family and that includes forgiving my mother and letting her feel guilt for the things that slipped through her fingers. S made it clear that my brother does not need to be a part of my new family nor do I have to forgive him for it. When L and I started wedding planning we thought maybe having my brother in L’s groomsmen and I was going to have his sister as my Matron of honour but the more I thought about it the more I didn’t want my brother included in that. I told L to feel no obligation for my brother to be in his groomsmen and now that I think more and more about it I don’t even know if I want my brother to be at the wedding or if he’d even show up because it wouldn’t be convenient for him. I would love Y to be there but not him. I am closer to his wife than I am to him nowadays and she stands up for me. I just don’t get how she could be with someone so awful. It makes no sense to me but that’s up to her.

Now the question that is brooding in my mind and the one person I actually want to talk about all this with is my dad because I think he will understand but I also don’t want to disturb him either as I know he is busy. I might try honestly though. I think its important for him and I to share certain things and he’s always been my voice of rationality as I have been for him. Maybe I’ll talk to him....

#abuse #physical abuse #emotional abuse #tw #sexual abuse #rape #therapy #journey #life #moving on #forgiveness #mental health #mental abuse #rant #family #anxiety #brother and sister #depression #self harm

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a-simple-writers-journal · 5 years

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Sad Eyes

The boy with the sad eyes who tries to light up everyone’s world but his own

A laugh so infectious that no one can hear the hushed pain behind it

But boy with the sad eyes, you are so much greater than your pain

You were put on this earth for something greater than this

This is just a chapter of life

We do not let our pain decide our end

For if we do

There would not be another chapter

Our pain shapes us,

It can make us cold and bitter

But you have chosen to use it to make you kind and compassionate and caring without letting others consume you

You found your outlet for your pain

Each of us broken eventually do

Because sometimes being someone else for even a little while is better than being ourselves

But at some point or another we realize we do love ourselves

Sometimes with the help of others

Or sometimes it just finally rings true in our heads

Your day will come

When you learn to love yourself

All wounds and scars included

But until then

Don’t let the stars that glimmer in your eyes ever burn out

For they are the reason you are here and meant to stay

The broken

The damned

The ugly

The dreamers

They are all put on this earth for a reason

And so were you

You just have to stay to find out.

Julia Mackinnon February 7th 2019

This one is a little different from most things I’ve written. This is about a friend and he’ll be receiving this at some point.

#poetry #poem #poets on tumblr #poetic #free verse #depression #suicide #suicidal #purpose #hope #reasons for being here #love #self love

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a-simple-writers-journal · 5 years

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Swim

I feel a million pounds lighter

It’s just funny how one thing can weigh on you so much

And then the minute you tell the person who matters it all just kinda goes away

Doesn’t seem as complicated

I didn’t know how to do it

How to deal with it cause I couldn’t come to terms with it myself

I think I had the conversation over a thousand times in my head

And you know what?

It didn’t go at all like I had planned

And you know what?

My anxiety doesn’t know shit.

It made me believe this would be our disconnect

Something that was too much for you

And instead

I feel more open and honest and more like myself than I have felt in months

And best of all

I feel closer to you.

I know why I was mad

Why my anxiety was high

And why my lows were like a trench in the ocean

But you just pulled me out

And you may have to keep pulling me out

I’ll continue to drown until I learn to swim

But like a toddler in a kiddie pool you’ll pick me back up after each soul crushing wave beats down on me

I will learn to swim eventually

I’ll learn how to get back on dry land

But for right now I’m a buoy

Being rocked back and forth in a tsunami

One more big wave from plummeting down into the water and being capsized again

I just need the help

And I need you to pick me back up when I fall

Julia Mackinnon- November 16th 2018

#poetry #poem #poets on tumblr #love #poetic #free verse #depression #abuse #talking #rape #sexual assault survivor #relationships #anxiety #swim #head above the water #tsunami

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a-simple-writers-journal · 5 years

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Closer

It’s nights like this where I miss you so much my heart aches

My body stays awake to feel the pain of an empty spot beside me where you should be

But you’re not

And that’s why I can’t sleep

I wish to reach out to you as reassurance you’re there but I can’t and I’m not comforted

With each day coming closer and closer

My heart picks up a beat

I can feel the nervous excitement

And I can’t wait to be with you again

I want to run to you

If I could I would’ve by now

But even just the sound of your voice and the sight of your face is enough to make me even a bit happier in this hell we’re living

As bad as it is I’m glad I don’t suffer alone

To know I made your week

To know I’m not alone in the sleepless nights

But alas we must wait

Never in my life has a summer been so long

And I know it’s because you aren’t here

And that is what is causing this eternity

Julia Mackinnon- August 5th 2018

#poetry #poem #poets on tumblr #love #poetic #free verse #missing you #long distance #long distant couple #long distance relationship #ldr #empty bed #emptynest

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a-simple-writers-journal · 5 years

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Hurt

It all came flowing back

That sting in the heart

The watering of my eyes

Irrational but it still hurts

No matter how much of it was rationalized

It was still a choice

My choice

A hit to my ego

But also a window into what I thought I deserved

I thought I deserved it all

I dealt with it all because it was better than being beat

I traded physical bruises for mental ones

And I didn’t know that they were just the same if not worse

The physical ones fade with time

But the mental ones,

Well the mental ones stick with you for a lifetime

And yet it still hurts to this very day

I still fear your presence in my life

I still fear what you may do

I know better now but every thought

Every time your name is breathed

I hurt

I sting like salt being rubbed in the wound

Every little bit excruciating and wishing for it to be over.

I want so much for it to be over

I want it all erased from my life

I want it away from my family

Out of my memories completely but I can’t

I just have to try to heal

Grin and bear when it comes up

And then move on

I will not allow myself to live in fear again

Not again.

Never again.

But yes it still hurts....

Julia Mackinnon- July 28th 2018

#poetry #poem #poets on tumblr #poetic #free verse #fear #abuse #abusive relationship #leaving #hurt #mental abuse #physical abuse #mental illness #ptsd

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a-simple-writers-journal · 5 years

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Blackholes

A black hole never starts as an ongoing abyss

It can start off as just light and then slowly fades out into a shadow

But it feeds off every energy in its space

Slowly consuming every bit of light and positive energy

From one it becomes dim and the lights falter

The day turns to night and all of a sudden it’s always dark out

Every ounce of good positive energy is sucked in and never returns

People warn others not to go near it for their fate may be the same but it’s gravity is too strong

You can’t pull away

And that’s when you sink to the bottom of the abyss

Hoping someone will save you all

But maybe there is no saving

Maybe there’s no end

Who knows what lies beyond the black hole except those who have gone through

All you can hope is that it is life

New life

To be reborn

And once everything has ended

There’s only beginning and future ahead

Julia Mackinnon- March 25 2018

#black hole #poetry #poem #poets on tumblr #free verse #depression #abyss #poetic #doom #feeling down #being saved

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a-simple-writers-journal · 5 years

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Chinook

The wind rattles the house,

It shakes my soul

It’s unnerving and strong

A force to be reckoned with.

These Chinooks bring fresh change just when we need it the most

A reminder that spring is on its way

That winter does not last forever

But why is it these winds keep me awake at night?

For is it the change they bring?

The fear of what they will bring next?

Whether it be warm winds and sunshine or more cold dark days

Unpredictable

Scary

They howl like something to be feared

A force so strong they shape the cliffs around us

Some nights the winds are magical

Mystical in a way

They take all the stress and the pain away

But it’s night like this that keep me awake.

I grew up accustomed to rain

Rain is predictable and it rocks you to sleep with it’s rhythmic drumming on the roof

The worse you could wake to was more rain

But a part of you always hopes for sunshine the next day.

Thats not a scary change

It’s a good one

But I believe its this familiarity that leads me to fear these winds which roll off giants and across seas of gold

They are so mysterious because sometimes they just stop.....

And then you’re left with what remains.

Julia Mackinnon- February 13th 2018

#chinook #wind #poetry #poets on tumblr #poem #free verse #changes #fear of change #familiarity #poetic

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a-simple-writers-journal · 6 years

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SAD

S.A.D. (Seasonal Affective Disorder)

The rain pounds on the roof.

Sucking me into my sleepy decay

Where dreams suffocate the day out of me

And I am helpless.

The night surrounds me, pounding in my brain

Silent pounding

Except the pounding of rain

My mind goes still for a moment

And I realize my reality

Awaken with a shock.

Back to humanity......

Another gloomy day

The rain still pounds away.

Can I leave this place?

Not for a while they say

A long walk, dodging puddles and rain drops like bullets.

The day to day war with the weather

It bothers me more than others, showing in my dreams, my moods, my life.

Let the raindrops stop and the clouds clear away.

To a final sunny day.

And as the sun creeps in, so does my happiness

No matter how much work or stress, the sunny days are the happiest

Artificial light, what a weird thing to say

Keeps me happy every day

Even the dark and gloomy

Where I feel so low

An hour with this light and I am all smiles.

Now i can tell you one thing, this was no easy feat

I overcame and ravaged everything so discreet.

And now my final words on a dark and stormy night

All the good sorrows end with happiness and light

Julia MacKinnon - September 24 2013

(Found this one in Facebook memories and really starting to feel it again)

#seasonal affective disorder #poetry #free form poetry #poets on tumblr #poetic #free verse #depression #rain #fall #autumn

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a-simple-writers-journal · 6 years

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Snow

It’s icy outside

The snow keeps coming down

And there’s no plan of stopping anytime soon

I watch as the wind howls

Blowing it sideways

The city at a standstill

Waiting for it to stop

I’m safe inside

Safe in your arms

My head on your chest

Your heart pounding in ear rhythmically with the snow coming down

This is my happy place

My secret spot

The one in your arms

My face buried in your neck

Under the blankets

Warm

Nothing matters here

Just love

Just happiness

My worries melt away

Like the warmth of your body melts away the cold in my finger tips to my toes

And all of a sudden life doesn’t seem so complicated

It’s simple

It’s carefree

It goes in every which way the wind may blow

Just like the snow outside

So graceful

No sense of urgency

But it never stops

Neither does life though

And sometimes you have to bear the cold

Just to reach the spring

But somewhere....

The snow is always falling

- Julia MacKinnon January 28 2018

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a-simple-writers-journal · 6 years

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Silence

Sometimes all I really want is genuine silence for a while

There are days when I can tolerate the white noise

It even calms me

Like listening to waves crash against the rocks

Or listening to the rain as it seamlessly pounds on the rooftop

But there are days when all that overwhelms me

I can’t focus on any noise

They all come at me at once

I’m drowning in a sea of sound and it keeps pulling me under

That’s why I prefer the silence of two am

Barely anyone is awake

Besides those who enjoy the quiet

Or those who are haunted by the sounds of the day

Kept awake by their constant ghostly whirring

It’s so peaceful, the silence

The world just kinda stops turning

It’s takes a deep breath

You can almost hear the air flowing

In....

And out.....

If you listen close enough

Sometimes I just need to hear the silence

Maybe just once in a while

The sounds of the day

Of life

Become too much

And I yearn for the silence

I yearn for silence.....

Even just for a little while

And when it finally comes

I can take a deep breath with the earth

And just....

Breathe....

- Julia MacKinnon January 24 2017

#poem #poems on tumblr #poetry #free verse #free form #spoken word #silence #sensory overload #sensory overstimulation #silent nights #sounds #senses #life #sounds of silence #relaxation #breathing #take a deep breath #world stops turning

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a-simple-writers-journal · 6 years

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A Thank You

This won’t be like last time

I’ve learned

I’m so afraid of making the same mistakes but I’m that this will be different

One thing I’m not afraid of is talking about it though

I know you’ll hear me

You’ll listen

You validate me, my feelings

I’m no scared of judgement

And I think that’s why I can

Why I want to be open with you about it

I don’t want to keep you out

Even though the last person I let in hurt me and used my mental state as ammunition against me

But this is different

I want you to know why I’m so tired

Why sometimes I’ll snap

I want you to know it’s not you

It’s everything going on in my head

You need to know that if anything, you make things better

I want you to know that there will be days when I’m sad

Days when I’m dazed

Days when I panic for no other reason than some brain chemicals messing around

And I want you to know that sometimes I just need to cry and be held

Because even though you may not be able to relate

Even though every part of you wants to do more, to be more for me

You’re already doing more than I possibly could have asked for

And that my love is why you deserve to know

And I thank you

For everything you’ve done

And for everything you’re being for me

Julia MacKinnon - January 11 2018

#thanks #free form #free verse #poetry #poem #poets on tumblr #poems on tumblr #love #support #thank you #thank you letter #mental health #mental disorder #depression #anxiety #opening up #being open #spoken word

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a-simple-writers-journal · 6 years

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Tides

It comes in waves

Littles ones

Lightly nudging the rocks

Other times it’s like high tide

The water up to your neck

Barely keeping your head above the water

Trying not to let it consume you

Just trying to float and treat it out till you can touch the bottom again

Sometimes though it comes out of nowhere

Slack tide has lasted so long

You began to enjoy the calm waters

But then it comes

Like it always does

But this time it’s a tsunami

It overwhelms you

You try to fight it but your head is under the water and you don’t know where the surface is anymore

Every inch of your being is fighting for you

Screaming at you to keep swimming

But when you’re under for so long....

Sometimes you just really want to stop

You get so tired

You just stop fighting

Sometimes that’s what consumes and kills the best of us

You can’t even blame them for not trying

You know at some point the surface became unreachable

Because sometimes the air just escapes your lungs

And you sit at the bottom

Hoping someone or something will pull you up and out

Let you breathe again

Because you don’t know which way is up

And you don’t care anymore

Thats the scary part

The not caring

It’s the loss of hope that the waters will once again calm

But sometimes as if by the suddenness that the wave came on

The waters slack again

Your body rises to the surface

You can feel the warmth of the sun on your face

But what you’re left with is the damage the wave has done

And you must rebuild

And hopefully there’s others to help you

The ones who looked for you while you were drowning

Never losing hope you’d come back

And they’ll help you rebuild who you were before

Build you stronger to withstand the waves

And maybe one day

They’ll be your rescue boat

- Julia MacKinnon January 9 2018

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a-simple-writers-journal · 6 years

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The Dive

Fear

I think that’s what’s holding me back

You have absolutely no idea how terrified I really am

I want to tell you but I fear you’ll think I’m making excuses

I want to dive straight into the deep end but with what I’ve gone through I can’t do it without fear of what I became.... of what happened

I was purposefully drowning myself so that the one person I thought would come save me would

But instead they watched and let me drown saying they couldn’t save me

Sitting with a life preserver in their hands

Even worse was sometimes they were the one holding my head under

They laughed as I squirmed

Taunting me as they did

“It’s not like you’re drowning”

As I screamed and writhed mercessly for help

Sometimes I’d let myself be their life preserver too

I thought they’d do the same but they didn’t

Eventually they got out of the water all together and left me to drown on my own

When I finally realized no one was going to save me I mustered all the strength I had left

My eyes burning

My lungs screaming for air

And I pulled myself out

Now with everything I’ve been through.....

I wear a life preserver in the shallow end......

I want to be able to dive deep

Dive freely

Enjoy the way the water feels

But I’m haunted by the ever feeling of drowning

I don’t want to stay in the shallows forever know that

With time I may be able to swim again

With some guidance

A steady hand to catch me when I slip

And some trust

I may be able to make the jump into the deep end again

Just give me the chance....

Just know I’m scared

Just know it will take time

But maybe, just maybe, we can dive in together

- Julia MacKinnon January 4 2018

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a-simple-writers-journal · 6 years

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New Years

I’ve learned a lot this past year

A lot has changed in a year

I learned everything from who my real friends are

What love isn’t

How blind I can be when it comes to love

That when I’m in love, I’m in it till the bitter unfortunate end and how horrible that is

How unequal love can bring out the worst in me

I learned to protect myself because of it

But one thing I learned was what love is like when it’s mutual

When you don’t lose yourself

When you rediscover the self you thought you lost because you were trying to be perfect for someone who wouldn’t do the same for you

That’s true love

And that’s probably the best lesson I learned

I’ve changed this year

I became stronger than I ever thought I could be

Physically

Mentally

I’ve grown a thicker skin

Become more mature

Less naive

I’m proud of myself and who I’ve transformed into

Now for this year...

Do I even dare pray that it will be better?

But I do hope....

I hope for peace

For love

For prosperity

For health

All the things I’ve been deprived of for far too long

New year, new me?

No.

I just want to be the real me and true to myself for once

So here’s a toast, to everything better

May the best be yet to come

It can only go up from here

So happy new year with my fingers crossed and my hopes high

- Julia MacKinnon January 1 2018

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a-simple-writers-journal · 6 years

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Rain

The rain pounds against the roof

Rhythmically and smooth, never skipping a beat

It reminds me why I love this place so much

This music is the sound of many nights that helped me drift to sleep peacefully

It was the sound of comfort as I sat in a tent, wrapped up and warm

Safe from anything that may do harm

This is the song of my childhood

This feeling of comfort has followed me to my adulthood

It lets me watch and enjoy the rain

Cup of tea in hand

Or to stomp about in puddles like a toddler

Or to just stand and let my clothes become soaked

It allows me to feel free

I didn’t come back here for this purpose nor did I expect it

But in a sense this has made itself a pilgrimage

To seek and accept the looks, the sounds of approval

And to be baptized into this new life by the rains of which I grew up in

It is not just rain, it feeds the soul

It energizes

It enlightens

It makes you become reborn

It allows me to know I am on the right path

It’s allows me to be acknowledged

To be accepted for this path I’m on

And to receive the forgiveness I so desperately seek

This is what rain means to me

It will forever remind me of home

Where my heart lies next to the ocean and soars above the trees

But it shall always release me and free me

For I do not belong here anymore

And for the first time in my life,

I am perfectly content with that

- Julia MacKinnon December 30 2017

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a-simple-writers-journal · 6 years

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Growing Up

It’s funny how things change when we grow up and how only some things will stay the same

Your home changes, your friends change, your family changes and grows, people grow apart

It’s never the same

Now don’t get me wrong

I wasn’t expecting life to have stopped or to have stayed exactly the way I left it

But I had been expecting more than this

I thought people missed me more

Wanted to see me more

Wanted to do more

But now I’m left staring at a blank wall

Utterly bored

Full of false promises

Longing to go back home to where I belong

Home is not here anymore

It’s doesn’t matter how many tell me I should “come back home” more often

It doesn’t matter that my mom still calls my room mine

It’s the actions that follow

No follow up

No excitement that I’m here

Ignoring me and the texts I send

That just shows I don’t belong anymore

It shows they don’t want me here or could care less if I had come

The idea of me is more exciting than my actual presence

But it shows who my true friends are

How my friends back home have been better family than my own blood

They miss me more in a week than my friends and family here do in a year

They don’t have to miss me

They don’t have to love me

But they do and they do it unconditionally

Here.... I don’t fit into the boxes they want to put me in anymore

If I do something, if I say something they don’t expect I’m ridiculed

I’m thrown away like damaged goods

Maybe it was the growing and learning I did and they stayed the same

Maybe it was the other way around

Maybe we each changed

It’s all apart of growing up isn’t it?

Change

There’s people who fear it

People who embrace it

That’s what really divides us isn’t it?

At some point we all have to understand and acknowledge we’ve grown apart

I’ve realized it now

But I don’t know when they will

Or if they have and can’t say a thing

But it’s all about growing up

We grow apart

We change

Vines from the same tree diverging different ways

And one day we’ll have to accept it and face reality

We are not who we once were and never will be again

- Julia MacKinnon December 26 2017

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