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#you also put me under pressure with saying things like that it made me feel like I am not good enough
avatarmerida · 2 days
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We're getting skater girl part 2?!?! I'm so excited!
Actually it's Part 3! You can find part 1 here and part 2 here
aaaaaaand here's part three:
Hunter usually got to school early anyway, but Monday morning he was there before Bump had even unlocked the door.
He had hardly slept, which wasn’t terribly new, but this type of anxiety didn’t just make him scared he was also a little… excited?
Friday night played over and over in his mind. During breakfast and his chores and his collection of endless lessons, his mind wandered back to the school steps. He stood at the bottom of the stairs at the edge of where the shadows started, looking at her like she was the only light that could cast them. One second they were just standing there and he got to see just how green her eyes were up close and the next he was kissing Willow. 
He kissed Willow.
He kissed Willow.
He kissed Willow. 
He had been impulsive, he still wasn’t sure if it technically broken school policy but he didn’t care? But he also cared a lot? But not about policy for once, no he cared about what it actually meant. He knew things happened at dances that would not happen otherwise, things people hoped for, things that happened impulsively under the guise of the flashing lights. Things people came to regret come Monday morning.
He knew his moment with Willow had been two of these, but he hoped it wouldn’t try for all three.
When she had gotten him to his house with plenty of time to spare they were a collection of muffled laughter as they tried to keep quiet. Normally, he’d be anxious about what his uncle would say, but Willow made him feel safe. When Willow touched him, it activated a bubble. It was like the pressure of his position, the weight of every expectation was gone because they were too fast for it to catch up. Even when they were standing still, if he was near her it still felt like flying. 
“Thank you again,” he said once his house was in sight. 
“No problem,” she said as she caught her breath. They would’ve gotten here in time with her usual speed, but she had gone faster to try and impress Hunter. The fact that the faster she went, the tighter he held onto her was just an added bonus. “I think I set a new personal record.”
“Cool,” he said, equally as breathless for a different reason. “Happy to help.”
They stood there as the autumn air hung between them, both in and out of their element. He wanted to say more but he didn't know what else there was to say. He was still a little embarrassed, a little confused, but being in her arms he felt like those problems could wait for him on the ground. But the realist in him knew he couldn’t stay here forever. Granted, he knew he could probably stay here awhile; she was pretty strong. 
But he didn’t want to overstay his welcome. 
“Um, Willow?”
“Yeah?”
“You can uh, put me down now,” he chuckled nervously, a part of him not wanting to say anything. Willow blushed at the realization that she was still holding him.
“Oh yeah, of course,” she said with a matching chuckle as she gently set him down. She playfully brushed imaginary dust off his shoulder. “Another successful delivery.”
“Heh, yeah,” Hunter said with a faint smile, kicking the ground knowing he had a few minutes to spare and not wanting to leave her just yet.
She fiddled with her braid, sharing the feeling. 
“It’s a nice night,” she sighed, looking up at the night sky. “You can see the stars out here. It’s really beautiful.”
“Yeah, really beautiful,” he breathed, looking at her looking at the sky. She smiled, feeling his eyes on her as they listened to the crickets chirp. 
Hunter knew if it wasn’t for him, Willow would be back at the school laughing and dancing and having the night she deserved. Now she had to skate home in the dark by herself and probably be late for her own curfew. How was he worth all that trouble?
“Willow, I need to apologize,” he said softly.
“You’ve apologized like twelve times already,” said Willow. “Hunter, I promise I’m not upset with you, you know it wasn’t your fault, right?”
He could tell she was trying to take it easy on him.
“It’s just… I still feel really bad for yelling at you,” he admitted.
“Oh stop, you yell at me all the time,” she reminded him.
Not like that, he thought. Never like that. 
“And also for making you miss the dance.” He said, realizing he had a long list of things to apologize for. “I mean I know how much you were looking forward to it and you didn’t even get to dance-.”
“Ah, it’s fine,” she assured him, waving her hand. “Besides, I probably wouldn’t have too much luck dancing in skates anyway.”
“Yeah but if I wasn’t such a jerk then maybe we could have gone together properly and you could have worn dancing shoes and a dance dress-.”
“‘A dance dress?’” Willow repeated with a giggle. “What’s a ‘dance dress?’”
“You know, like a fancy formal dress for a dance,” he said, slightly embarrassed. 
“Hmm, so you wanna see me in a fancy formal dress for a dance huh?” she teased.
He blushed. “I just want you to have the night you deserve,” he said, carefully choosing his words. “You deserve to be in the gym with all your friends having fun, not doing favors for me.”
“Hunter, I promise you more than made up for it,” she said with a smirk. “I had a wonderful night.”
“Really? How?” She had spent her whole night babysitting, then getting accused of Boscha’s lies, and then running home to help him. She had spent her whole night helping other people
“Because I got to spend it with you,” she said simply. “And that’s all I really wanted anyway.”
In this small serene moment outside all the chaos, Willow’s words caught up to him: I’ve had a crush on him for awhile now…
Did that count as a confession? Did he need something more direct or in writing to confirm that he hadn’t imagined or misheard her. Because it didn’t quite add up that this dizzy, silly, floating feeling that he had for Willow was returned. Even more unbelievable was that he hadn’t blown it. He had wanted to impress her, to be a perfect gentleman but even when she saw the side of him he wasn’t proud of, she still stayed. What had he done to earn such affection?
 He thought about kissing her again. They were far from school and there were no rules stopping him now, just nerves. But he didn’t want to do it just because no one would see. He didn’t want her to think he was doing it because he was grateful she had gotten him home before his curfew. He couldn’t describe in plain words why he wanted to do it, but his heart beat loud in his ears as the memory flooded his mind again. Whatever that was, he wanted it again.
“Well maybe next time we can hang out when you don’t have to rescue me because I’m running late for something,” he attempted to joke.
“Well maybe I like rescuing you,” she teased, moving closer to him. 
“Well maybe I like…” you he so desperately wanted to say. He wanted to show her how grateful he was for her, to know her, to be seen by her, to spend any amount of time with her. But again, it was complicated. He felt like he wasn’t allowed to like her but, like she was above and outside his world. She was a mystery and an open book at the same time, like a contradiction mixed with a shooting star. 
“…being rescued?” She offered. 
Did he like being swooped into her arms and whisked away like his troubles were a physical thing he could run from? Maybe more than he should. Being rescued implied inconveniencing someone, burdening them with his troubles. But with Willow it felt like being noticed, being cared for. Oh, she could rescue him anytime she wanted to.
“I just… uh… thank you. I know I’m not always the warmest or friendliest person but I’ve always thought you were so kind and patient and beautiful and I’m just not used to someone-”
He was cut off by her arms wrapped tightly around his waist, pinning his arms to his sides as her face rested against his chest. 
“Uh… w-what’s going on?” He asked. “N-not that I’m complaining I just don’t-.”
“I wanna help you get used to it,” she said. “Because I think you are a very warm and friendly person, even if you don’t think so.”
She didn’t mention that he had so casually called her beautiful, she kept that fact in her back pocket for a rainy day. 
“Well, I-I think you’re very… uh…”
“Beautiful?” she teased, resting her chin on his chest to look up at him mischievously. Okay, so maybe a rainy day didn’t have to be so far in the future. 
“Yeah,” he said, knowing he couldn’t believably deny it and frankly he didn’t want to. Something in her eyes hypnotized him and allowed him to move his arms around her back. The moving of his arms led her to naturally move hers up around his neck as they both gravitated towards each other. Normally being so close to her and being so quiet would make him nervous, but this somehow felt natural and calming. 
“Ya know this kinda feels like we’re slow dancing,” Willow observed with a smile.
“Yeah I uh guess so,” Hunter replied with a nervous chuckle as she adjusted her grip on his neck. He could not wrap his head around that this was how she had wanted to spend the night originally, that he didn’t see it sooner. That he had held himself back from believing it could be something she’d want with him. 
He didn’t know how to dance but he felt like that didn’t matter now. 
When he first allowed himself to entertain the idea of going to the dance with her, he tried to imagine a grand, romantic evening. He knew little about romance but felt the word suited her very being, romance was supposed to be whimsical and spontaneous and exciting which she effortlessly was. But he was organized and calculated and skeptical which maybe didn’t have to clash which made it hard for him to see what she saw in him. Would he have known to hold her like this under the flashing lights and loud music barely covering the whispers of their peers? Would he have known how to keep the conversation going, known the right thing to say, known how to tell if things were going well? 
But maybe just trying was enough.
“Maybe you can work your magic at the next student council meeting to see if we can push up the next dance,” she said, her voice a mixture of humor and genuine hope. He hadn’t totally blown it and he wasn’t blowing it now, though he didn’t fully understand how. 
“Maybe,” he said. Oh, he would pull strings, pull rank, pull in any argument he could to make it so. He wanted to show her he was capable of showing her the time she deserved. He felt he owed her so much. Why couldn’t he say more? “It’ll give me time to practice so I actually know what I’m doing.”
“Well I’d be happy to help you practice,” she said and Hunter realized they had started to slightly sway. He intended to practice in order to impress her when the time came so he wouldn’t want her to see his awkward progress but something in her voice made him suspect she knew that but was implying something more. He tried to match her tone.
“Luckily I’m a fast learner,” he said, smoother than he had ever said anything in his life. He demonstrated by focusing all of his courage to pull her closer and skillfully lean her into a small dip. Her grip on him tightened, but not for fear he’d drop her. She let out a light giggle as her eyes locked down the way the streetlights above framed his head like a halo and how natural it looked resting in his golden hair. She held her breath, thinking about kissing him again. Thinking so hard she swore he could hear her thoughts as he leaned in closer. 
Then out of the corner of their sight a light went on that stopped them dead in their tracks. 
“Oh no,” Hunter whispered. “My uncle is awake.”
Without thinking Willow shifted her weight and knocked Hunter off his feet and brought them both down to the ground, out of sight in case his uncle happened to look out the window. She covered his mouth to prevent his sounds of surprise from giving them away. 
“Don’t worry,” she whispered. “I’ll get you inside so he doesn’t know you’ve been out.”
“But how?” Hunter whispered back, too focused on his panic to process their position on the ground which would normally leave him flustered. “I won’t be able to use the front door because he uses the chain lock.”
“Can you climb through a window maybe?”
“Probably, but I’m not sure I can do it without him hearing.”
“Don’t worry about that,” Willow assured. “I said I’d get you home and that’s what I’m gonna do. Let me handle distracting your uncle.”
Hunter’s heart sank, he knew his uncle was a stern and cold man and he didn’t want Willow to have to endure such energy on his behalf. “But you’ve already done so much for me, I can’t ask you to-.”
“Hey now,” she cut him off by pressing his finger to his lips. “I like being your knight in shining armor, okay? Just leave it to me.” 
“But what will you say? How are you gonna explain knocking on a door at 10pm?”
“Don’t worry, he won’t suspect I’m here to see you or anything” she assured him. “I’ll tell him I’m lost, that I’m looking for my aunt’s house or something. I’ll make something up and it’ll give you enough time to run upstairs.”
“Do you have a lot of experience sneaking into places?” Hunter gulped, trying to mix a compliment into his concern.
“Wouldn’t you like to know,” she said playfully, moving her finger from his lips to boop his nose. Her confidence made him calm and he cracked a smile. “When you get inside safely, text me and I’ll head out.”
“But I don’t have your number.”
“Well it’s about time you asked for it then, isn’t it?” She smirked. “C’mere.”
She grabbed his hand as she fetched a marker for her skirt pocket, skillfully removing the cap with her teeth as she delicately wrote her phone number on his wrist. He watched with bated breath as she finished it with a tiny heart and he hoped she couldn’t hear his heart beating as his mind screamed at him that he would never be this cool.
“Wait like a minute and then make your way to the back, okay?” Willow instructed as she recapped the marker. She leapt back onto her feet as she dusted the dust from her blouse. “I won’t leave until you text me.”
“Okay,” he whispered from the ground, now in awe of the halo that found her. “And uh, w-what should I text you?”
“Send me a heart,” she said with a wink before taking off to the door. He watched her through the sheaves in the bushes, wondering how she continued to out-wonderful herself. 
After a minute, he tiptoed around the house listening as Willow spun a tale of asking for directions unsure of the order of the numbers of the house she was looking for and color of the house. She kept going, giving his uncle no time to turn her away as she added to her fictional predicament. He stifled his laughter as he silently bolted up the stairs, marveling at the way she was able to make a normally panic inducing situation somewhat comical. 
The minute he carefully closed his door, he dashed to quickly change] his clothes before diving beneath the covers to copy the numbers on his arm to text Willow the code. He agonized a minute over which heart to send her before deciding on the yellow one, so she would know for sure it was from him. 
After another minute he received a green heart in response. He stared at them, hypnotized by them on the illustrated screen together as he tried to decide if it was appropriate to say something else. Maybe he was to only use her number for business purposes. He didn’t have much practice texting, he didn’t want to risk misusing an abbreviation or emoji so he decided on: let me kno w hen u get h.Ome sa fe
He didn’t fall asleep until another green heart appeared from her.
———
Hunter didn’t know what to do next. She somehow kept getting cooler and he felt like he was falling behind when it came to showing her another side of him. He had her number now but he felt as though whatever came next had to happen in person. 
He didn’t want Darius (or even worse for his uncle) to hear him practice what he would say when he saw her so he knew getting to school early was his safest bet. 
But he needed to be ready for every possibility.
If she was cool, he had to be cool:
Oh hey Willow, do anything… fun this weekend? He would say, leaning against the locker. He imagined she would look at him with sparkling, mischievous eyes as she offered a clever retort. Maybe she would giggle, believing his attempt at charm.
If she played it off, he would too:
Oh yeah, it was uh so random right? He would say, and she would brush her hair behind her ear or twirl the end of her braid. Like, that’s just dances, ya know? Craaazy haha
If she was mad, he would be mad:
Boscha had no right to try and drag your name through the mud. We should work together to try and get back at her in a way that doesn’t violate school policy or anyone’s privacy but also has us spend a lot of time together.
Hmm, that one might need some workshopping.
He could be nonchalant, he could be business as usual, but the one thing he didn’t want to be was regretful. 
Because he wasn’t, and he hoped it wasn’t too much to hope she wasn’t too.
She had implied that she liked him, that she like-liked him. His mind wanted to trick him that she really meant something else but as much of a rule breaker as she was, she was not a liar. She didn’t tease him to be spiteful or cruel, she did it because she knew him. She knew he had a certain way of thinking and operating and speaking, so she had crafted a language just for them. As far as he knew she didn’t speak to anyone else like that, in a way that made his heart pause and pound and spin.
It took him awhile to accept that he liked her, but accepting it didn’t make it less confusing. He looked forward to seeing her everyday, and he liked things the way they were but lately she had been seeing him more, saying more, implying more. He didn’t know how to want more, he didn’t know what that looked like. 
It was risky, but Willow was all about risks. So maybe he needed to take a risk.
Hunter heard the hustle and  bustle start up in the hallway and knew Willow would be joining the masses any minute, and he wanted to be looking cool and proper when she did. 
He imagined her skating down the hallway, her loose braids trailing behind her like a comet’s tail and she’d spot him leaning against the locker looking suave and confident and her mind would straw back to Friday night with fondness. 
He took one last deep breath and prepared himself to enter the hallway, knowing he was losing time before the bell rang. But as he rushed into the hall, he bumped into someone and it sent him flying backwards onto the ground. 
“Sorry!” He said as he tried to regain his balance to once again rise to his feet, but the faster he got up the faster he’d fall down again. “Sorry! I take full responsibility, I know I shouldn’t even be-.”
“Hunter?” A familiar voice asked and he stopped himself as he looked up to see Willow standing over him with a confused smile. She caught his eye as he looked up at his name and extended her hand to him, “Are you okay? I didn’t see you come out and I uh -wait, are you wearing skates?” “Willow! I uh- wait, are you not?” he said as he took her hand and she swiftly pulled him up. He rolled a bit but she caught him to keep him up. 
“Oh, yeah,” she said as though she herself had forgotten. “I well, uh I thought we could walk to class together and I didn’t wanna be faster than you so I changed out of them before I came in today.”
“I uh, I had the same idea, actually,” he chuckled as he tried to keep his balance, but she instinctively placed her arm under his to keep him steady. He was extra tall now, towering over her without skates with the added height from his. Like a tree, a Willow and her tree.  
“Oh, so does this mean skates are no longer against school policy?” she said sweetly.
“Oh no, they uh definitely are,” he said, fully in her embrace now.
“So you’re knowingly breaking school policy for me?” she asked. “Ooh, how romantic.”
He averted his eyes to the ground and Willow’s heart did a skip when she saw him struggle to find a clever comeback and instead found a vivid blush splashed across his face. She was glad that the events from Friday hadn’t changed her favorite part of their dynamic. In truth, that was the best response Hunter could have hoped for but as usual she stumped him.
“Uh, well I hope you don’t mind but after I dropped you off at your house I went back to the school and I picked up the flowers you… had,” she didn’t want to say ‘threw at my feet in hurt’ even though that technically was accurate. “And I spruced ‘em up. You picked a really nice selection.”
“Oh, uh thanks yeah,” he replied, secretly thankful she appreciated his efforts as he took notice of the arrangement in her other hand.”I uh… read a book about it once.”
“Cool,” she said, biting her lip like she was dying to say something. “So I uh, brought them because I thought they were really nice and if I had asked you to the dance like I wanted, well… I would’ve brought you flowers so I thought….”
“You brought these for me?” Hunter asked breathlessly. 
“Yeah,” she said, suddenly flustered by her own actions. “But now I’m realizing I’m just giving you the same flowers you were going to give to me and that’s probably stupid so I’m sorry if I-.”
“It’s not stupid!” He said louder than he meant to. “I uh… thanks.” 
Willow giggled as she handed them to him. “So, you were gonna give them to me, right?”
“Huh? Oh, yeah well when I thought you had… well I know it’s customary not to show up empty handed so I wanted to be prepared.”
“And you said you read a book about flowers?”
“Uh yeah maybe a few.”
“So you picked those particular flowers for a particular reason then?”
He gulped. He knew she knew what the flowers meant, he had hoped she would know but hearing her say it aloud made him nervous. He wasn’t going to take it back, wasn’t going to deny it but he had picked these particular flowers to say what he didn’t have another way to say. 
“I guess I-I did yes.”
“Good,” she smiled. “Because I wanted to give them to you because they’re the same flowers I would have picked for you. Because I…  have also read a few books about them.”
“Oh yeah well that figures since you’re in the gardening club and you-uh,” he looked from the transformed bouquet (not before noting she had added a few flowers of her own to enhance it) back to her looking as though she was waiting. She was waiting for him.
Waiting for him to understand why they’d buy the same flowers. 
“Hunter, you know I like you, right?”
She said it so simply, so easily, so street-of-factly as though she was reminding him of the weather or day of the week. He had hoped everything was adding up but when he applied probability to the idea of Willow liking him he always left room for error. He was always 75% sure or 80% but never 100%. He knew his judgment was clouded by a selfish, confusing desire. He knew wanting wasn’t enough to make something so. But he didn’t know how else to turn the gamete, he didn’t see how just being himself was enough to win her over. 
But somehow it was. 
“I… suspected that maybe the feelings between us were… slightly more than platonic?” He said, unable to bring forth a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’ because it just wasn’t simple for him, it just wasn’t. “That’s uh what the gardenias were meant to symbolize.” He wasn’t nearly as confident and cool and he had sought out to be, but that didn’t seem to bother Willow who was bouncing on her heels as the words bubbled up inside her, as though they couldn’t decide if she was about to fly away or burst as she delighted in his response and was eager to share more.
“So I was wondering if you’d want to come to my roller derby match later,” she said bashfully. “I know it’s kind an unusual date since we can’t really talk while I’m skating and it’s a little loud so I don’t know if you’d feel comfortable and it’s okay if you’re not but either way after we could go get ice cream and I know this spot in the park by the lake and I thought we could-.”
“A date?” Hunter gulped, acting as though the word had been lost to society until Willow rediscovered it. He wasn’t used to second chances, especially when he felt he hadn’t earned the first one, but once again Willow knew more.
“Uh yeah,” she said with a nervous giggle. “Tonight.”
“W-with me?”
“Uh-huh.”
“But… why?”
“Because I like you silly.”
“I know but… why?” he looked at her from behind the flowers, almost startled.
He could justify that Willow didn’t know him well enough to like him, but the side of him that she did know wasn’t exactly the most appealing. The students called him a narc, a nerd, annoying; things he couldn’t exactly argue with. But beneath that even he wasn’t exactly sure what he was, so did Willow see more or did she just not believe it? Sometimes he didn’t really like being himself so it was hard to keep up the charade that someone as vibrant and silly as Willow would like being with him more than what was necessary.
“I told you,” she said sweetly as she pushed past a rose to see him better. “I can tell you’re a warm and friendly person. I also know you’re smart and passionate and cute and I wanna know more about you and spend time with you.”
“Wow thanks,” he breathed, holding her gaze as everything else around them went silent. His instinct to mention how packed his schedule was as he had grown to instinctively do when he longed to do anything that couldn’t enrich his transcript. He didn’t want to talk her out of it or deny he liked the sound of it, he just didn’t know how to say that yet. “Y-you too.”
“Thanks,” she said, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “I was also wondering if maybe you’d wanna wear my captain’s jacket.”
“Wear your jacket?” “Yeah, cause Skara has her boyfriend wear hers as a way to like show everyone they’re together so I thought maybe if you wanted to we could… do that… too.”
It took a moment for Hunter to process the request within the request but when he finally did, his eyes widened in wonder. “You want me to be your boyfriend?”
“Mhm-hmm,” she said with a smile and a nod.
It was everything all at once, Hunter was sure he must have wandered into a dream.
“And you want people to know I’m your boyfriend?”
“Mhm-hmm,” she repeated, this time more bubbly as she felt like she was about to leap out of her skin. “I uh I know it’s technically breaking dress code and it might be too soon so it’s okay if you don’t-.”
“I’ll wear it!” he said much louder than he meant to, as though worried that not answering right away would cause her to take it back. “I-I wanna wear it! Of course I will! Yes!”
“Okay!” Willow giggled as she bent down to fish it from her bag. She held it out to Hunter and he looked at it like it was a corner of the sky. She took the flowers back from him as he slipped the jacket over his uniform. He knew it was impractical and he would get too hot and surely be told by the first teacher who saw him to keep it in his locker but he didn’t care. The smell of fresh grass and jasmine filled his nose, and he felt giddy to be in the jacket he had seen her in so many times. His arms were longer than hers and the sleeves bunched higher up on his arms but it had always been long on her and it fell perfectly on him. It was pristine and he knew she had washed and carefully folded it with the intention to give it to him. 
“H-how do I look?”
“Cute!” she beamed as she smoothed the collar and Hunter felt he would melt. He meant alot to her. She didn’t care that talking to him could be considered social suicide, let alone so publicly declaring an advanced friendship between them. She had a confidence rooted in kindness that he hoped was contagious enough that he made her feel as safe and seen as he did in her perfect, peridot eyes. But as much as he was willing to publicly wear his feelings for her on his sleeve (well technically it was her sleeve since it was her jacket, right?) there were still things he felt more comfortable expressing in private. 
“Um…c-can I give you something of mine to wear?” he asked timidly, clearing his throat as he tried to shake the nerves to sound suave.
Willow nodded excitedly, having the exact Monday she had hoped for as Hunter reached inside to his own jacket as he fetched something small from it and quickly placed it in her hands.
“Your honor society pin?” Willow marveled as though he had given her a diamond. “Hunter, are you sure?”
“Yeah, uh Amity lets Luz wear hers and I always secretly thought it was kind of… romantic but if you think it's weird I can find something else-.”
“Are you kidding? I love it!” she declared as she held it close to her heart. “Thank you Hunter, this is so sweet! I’m gonna wait to put it on so it doesn’t get lost during the match. Can you hold onto it for me until then?”
“Of course,” he said, as he went to take it. “I’ll give it to you after you win.”
“Aw,” she said. “I think it’ll be my new lucky charm.”
He looked down as saw her hand had not left his, happily content to be held by his as her finger danced to intertwine with his and a very familiar idea reappeared in his head, as though the timing had been gifted to him. But the hallway wasn’t the right place.
“S-shoud I walk you to class then?” he transitioned. “I uh don’t want you to be late.”
“Well then,” she said with delight, reconfiguring their hands to link pinkies with his. “Let’s go.”
“Y-yeah let’s,” said Hunter happily as he allowed her to help him roll slowly down the hall. Her grip on him was gentle, but he felt secure in his link to her. 
“Um, actually I need to make a small detour first,” he said after a moment when they had escaped one of the more populated parts on the hallway.
“Oh, of course,” said Willow. “Did you forget something?”
“Uh, no I just wanted to see if I could get a vase for the flowers,” he said. “To keep them looking great, er m-maybe there’s one in the janitor’s closet?’
“You wanna look in the janitor’s closet?” Willow repeated. 
“Uh… yeah?”
“Hmmm… sounds good to me!” she said with a shrug as they turned the corner, and ever the gentleman he held the door open for her.
She knew he knew nothing (or at least, wasn’t able to focus on in this moment) the implications of quickly whisking her into a janitor’s closet before the bell rang. But she couldn’t wait to see his face when she told him.
He carefully closed the door behind them as Willow took in the sight of carefully organized buckets, mops, and large rolls of toilet paper. There was barely enough room in the closet for the both of them let alone a shelf of emergency vases.
“So… just need to get a vase, huh?” she asked playfully and Hunter quickly spun to face her, his face stung with guilt.
“Okay, to be honest I’m fairly certain there are no vases in here,” he admitted, unaware it was unnecessary. “Actually, I’m positive; I put them away myself after the student council luncheon.”
“So then, what are we here looking for?’
“Um well, actually I thought I could uh,” Hunter began as he cleared his throat. “G-give you uh something else for luck...too.”
“Oh yeah?” Willow asked, raising her eyebrow flirtatiously. “What did you have in mind?”
It sent Hunter over the edge as he let out a high, nervous laugh and hid his face in the bouquet, overwhelmed in a way that felt both new and familiar. He felt the subtle need to still check to see they were not being watched before he quickly darted down and pressed a quick kiss to her cheek. His heart pounded as he pulled away just as quickly as she looked back at him with an absolutely smitten gaze.
“Hehe okay,” she giggled, her mind joyfully flooding with the reality that she couldn’t tease Hunter about people thinking they ducked into the closet to kiss and get him flustered at the  misunderstanding.Now she was the one flustered but there was no misunderstanding. 
“I just um thought it was fair ya know?” he said as though his actions needed a more complex explanation. “Since you gave me your jacket and the flowers and that’s two things I wanted to give you two things so you would know t-that I uh-.”
“Well hold on, technically you gave me the flowers first so you did give me two things so I actually owe you one,” she stood up on her tiptoes to place a kiss on his cheek, lingering for a moment before returning to the ground. He smiled, feeling as though he was a part of the world’s best inside joke .
“Well you added flowers of your own so that can count as another thing,” he said, matching her tone, leaning down to press another kiss to her other cheek and lingering for a moment just as she did. Her face was soft and warm and somehow made him feel like a dream did.
“Actually, I should probably thank you for each flower,” said Willow, shuffling forward to take hold of his lapel as she brought him down to her level this time as her lips crashed into him like a wave, seeking to cover every inch of his doting, dumbstruck face as he surrendered his balance to her affections. He was more than fine collapsing into her as she decorated him with rapid kisses, as though she was bestowing one for every flower in her greenhouse.
Too enamored with each other they didn’t notice the door handle begin to turn. They didn’t notice the door had opened until their private, idyllic atmosphere of the closet was broken by the harsh fluorescent lights of the hallway.
They froze as they slowly turned their heads to see who stood in the doorframe. Hunter panicked, knowing how it would look to have a student council member littered with dress code violations sitting on a bucket as he forgot how to breathe because the prettiest girl in the whole school covered his face in kisses. What would they think?
Well, what beside ‘lucky him?’
More importantly, how would their reputations survive? He winced., knowing Willow must be mortified to be caught with him and having someone think-
“Oh, hi Gus!” Willow giggled, and Hunter could tell she found it more humorous than embarrassing. Hunter held his breath as he tried to read Gus’ expression, knowing if he was at risk of being blackmailed or sent to the principal’s office or if he’d tell Willow she was making a bad decision or if he’d-.
“Oh, so he said ‘yes?’” Gus asked nonchalantly, taking the jacket as a sign in addition to their… situation. 
“Yup!” Willow replied happily, adjusting her glasses.
“Cool, congrats guys,” said Gus, looking down to check the time and text Luz to let her know Willow wasn’t running late but was just… occupied. “Does he wanna sit with us at lunch?”
“Do you?” Willow asked, admiring the lipstick marks all over his face, a lipstick she may or may not have purposely worn in case an opportunity such as this presented itself. 
He nodded, unable to form worlds at the moment. 
“Cool, well the first bell just rang,” Gus let them know as he went to shut the door. “Don’t be late.”
“K, thanks!” called Willow. “Bye!”
“Did you uh wanna get to class then?” Hunter asked with a gulp, weirdly not caring about preserving his perfect attendance as he was captivated by the way even in the low watt lighting she reassembled an angel. He was suddenly aware of her hands still resting on his chest as though keeping him tethered to the earth and allowing him to linger in the moment just as her lips had once lingered on his. 
Please say no, please say no the less poetic part of his brain couldn’t help but think.
“We’ve got time still,” she said as though reading his mind as she wiped a smudge of raspberry gloss from his top lip before leaping up to assure the door was really locked this time. “I know the quickest way everywhere on skates.”
And she crashed into him again.
She didn’t mention that she may have memorized his schedule in order to increase her chances of running into him between classes after the first time he had threatened to write her up. Ever since she had been doodling his initials in hearts in the corner of her notebooks, finding delight in every rip and tear her mode of transportation granted her as she knew he would drop the facade to sew it up for her, treasuring every time she got him to crack a smile
He spent so much time trying to catch her that it had taken him so long to realize that she was waiting for him to catch up to her.
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oatbugs · 1 year
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eye pain is the WORST kind . worse than teeth even maybe
#esp when u cant rub ur eyes or itll maoe things worse#typing this w my eyes closed i hope it is comprehensible#anyway whwt the FUCK i am in so much pain from one eye only and its like . im aftaid#the flap they made during frmto lasik has moved or smthb. and itll wont end#bc whenever i open my eyes/blink iy is painful#resolved to do that very rarely . anyway eave me x . avcording to my doctor/surgeon i actually had#a scar that was imperceptible initially on each eye and thats why thos whole thing has been so#excruciatingly painful . like apparently ur notnsupposed to rly feel anythiny in femto lasik but it was#literally the worst pain i have ever felt in my whole life (i have a rly high pain tolerebce due to reasons);#anyway i have a feeling this may be due to the wounds/scars too idk...#also i had fat grafting to fill in my under eyes and like . it was suchba slight procedure and was done when i was under#anaesthesia for another procedure...that i forgot abt it. bc i dont rly touch my under eyes. anyway during lasik they#use this device which puts pressure around ur eye sockets which ahould have been fine#but it was putting a lot of pressure on a newly grafted area of my face and i was like . oh i see ! i want to scream !!!!!#but i couldnt say anything bc it was cutting a hole in my eyes and i was like yeah talking rn is a bad idea. but afterwards the nurse was#like . you look like you are literally going to pass out oh my god are you ok ?? and i told her abt the under eye thing and she was like.#YOUBSHOULD HAVE SAID THAT EARLIER like yeah ik im sorry 😭#personal#anyway lol its fine i just want to rub my left eye sooooo bad it is so . annoying /painful UGH
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myheartxmyman · 28 days
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Right now I feel so old and sad at the same time. Those feelings are so strong I feel paralyzed and slow.
#right now it's all too much#got so many problems and they are going round in circles through my mind-uncontrollably#my mind jumps from one painful thought over to the next and all I currently manage to do is stay calm#endure this vicious cycle of traumatic events#and stop myself from screaming#I am calm I do endure and I suffer#maybe in a bit I will help myself out of this situation I am currently trapped in#right now calming myself down despite of all those things is hard enough#tonight I am drowning in waves of heart wrenching and soul crushing sadness#after a good night of sleep everything is gonna be a bit better I am sure of that#currently I am fighting I am crying I am breaking; but that's alright#when I endure feelings like this now then I don't have to endure them on another time#Life is an up and down#it will get better again#I remember the years when I got so depressed or whatever it was that I felt like everything just got worse and worse and worse#that's one of the things I feel sad about currently I am not doing well at all but nevertheless I KNOW there are gonna be better happier#lighter times#that's a huge step in personal growth and I did it on my own#I am slowly healing myself#I am changing#I am evolving#I am slowly getting better#and it hurt me a lot last year that you didn't acknowledge mile stones I reached all by myself you didn't see me as me#it felt like you looked at me with what you wanted to see and then you blamed me for not being that version of your#as you also mentioned 'dreamwife'#you also put me under pressure with saying things like that it made me feel like I am not good enough#like you are looking down on me#like I've to change and get better so you are getting the 'dreamwife' you perfected in your brain#I mean how old are you?#also you said things that forbid me grieving over the loss of my father and Louis
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grippingbeskar · 11 months
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i just k n o w that joel would absolutely love to have reader sit on his face. i don’t think he would ever initiate it, but if baby asked nicely 🤭🤭
asking nicely
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joel miller x afab!reader.
warnings: 18+ explicit content. (dirty talk. lil bit of dom!joel. face sitting clearly. joel being a mf tease i want to **** *** ****) swearing.
a/n: anon you are so right. like so so right. i love when people can read his character perfectly— like you are so right about this it’s maddening. he wouldn’t ask, but boyyyyy would he provide. thankyou for this i hope it’s okay i went a little crazy with it. also i didn’t edit this i just DID it. LET ME SIT ON YOUR FACE JOELSNJCKSNCJS
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“Stop fidgetin’.” Joel grumbles into the back of your neck, arm tightening around your hips to stop you from flipping over for the thousandth time. You cringe a little, knowing how the tiny bed you two have shacked up in for a night between patrol runs hides none of your thrashing movements to him. You hate keeping him from the limited sleep he gets— but it’s for a good reason.
“Sorry.” You say, and he groans in response. You try to stay still— really, you do. You try to just go to sleep, but his hand picks up it’s movement again, tracing light circles on the skin of your bare hip, and then you’re back where you started.
You feel bad you’re keeping him up, but it’s his fault. How are you meant to just fall asleep when he’s literally touching you? He’s… him. It’s impossible not to want to jump his bones every time he lays a finger on you, let alone hooks his strong arm over your body, his hips pressed against the back of yours.
You flip over again, face to face with him. One of his eyes open, and he groans.
“Darlin’.” He says, voice low and cracked with sleep. “What is it? You havin’ trouble sleeping?”
Instead of answering, you just nod and scoot a little closer to him. You were still naked from the events of just hours before, Joel bending you over the end of the bed and fucking you until your mind went blank, and he’d only bothered to put on his boxers before crashing into sleep behind you. The two of you were incessant like that— you were pretty sure it had something to do with how long it took you both to get together. Now you were, you just couldn’t stay away.
He sighs and wraps you in his arms, kissing you softly on the forehead before you tuck yourself away under his chin. It’s not true, really. Well, you were having trouble sleeping, but it’s not for the reason he thinks.
You hardly get any time alone. Between Jackson’s demanding patrol schedules and Ellie running around with all her friends, you and Joel only really get a few choice moments to be really alone. Usually, it’s great. You love having Ellie and everyone in Jackson around, but tonight you were happy to be alone, and it just made you think of all the things you two do when you’re alone, and now, when you’re supposed to be sleeping, you couldn’t stop thinking about it.
“Better?” He says, and it’s you sighing this time. He was so sweet to you— just you, all the time, and you really shouldn’t bother him with the dirty thoughts running through your mind right now. “Alright, what is it?”
“Nothing.” You mumble and hide your face. One of his arms slips back over you slowly, his hand trailing it’s way to your face. His hands are so strong, he hardly has to apply any pressure before your eyes flutter up to him, forcing your head up.
“You lyin’ to me, darlin’?” You frown, pouting. “Don’t look at me like that.”
“You can’t even see how I’m looking at you.” You squint, trying to find the lines of his face in the pitch dark room.
“Can feel it.” He tips your head higher, making your body wriggle up to follow his touch. His lips hover in front of yours, warmth rolling over your cheeks. “You having those dreams again?”
You shake your head.
“No?” He confirms, and you do it again. “You feelin’ okay? You sick or somethin’?”
“Joel—“
“Don’t whine. You’re a big girl. You need something, you ask for it.” It might not have meant to be taken like… that, but fuck, you were nearly shaking in anticipation. The dip in his voice, a slightly demeaning lilt in his tone— it was doing nothing to calm down the wicked heat spreading in your stomach.
Whatever your reaction, it told him everything he needed to know.
Suddenly he’s sitting up, taking some of that warmth with him, but then he’s reaching for you again, pulling your naked body into his lap and tucking your hair behind your ears. The movement is so natural, so practised to him that he can do it blind.
He laughs darkly, hands cupping your cheeks and kissing you so deeply that it makes you squeak in surprise. Your body tenses up, then melts into him as his hands begin to trail lower, giving you what you wordlessly told him you needed. He’s slow, letting his fingers dip into every curve around your hips, tracing the line of your spine and smiling into your mouth as you arch yourself closer.
His hands reach the base of your spine, then lower, squeezing your ass and groaning as you grind down into his lap. He pulls away, kissing roughly under your jaw, down your neck, the tired and lazy pace making it impossible to not wrap your arms around his neck and thread your fingers through his hair.
“This what you want, sweet thing?” All you can do is hum happily, and he grinds you down on his lap again. “Jesus Christ— fuckin’ insatiable.”
“Joel…” You whine, and his teeth graze the sensitive spot on your neck, making you gasp.
“What I say, huh? You need somethin’…” He dips his head, teeth nipping you bottom lip teasingly. “You ask for it.”
“Joel, come on…” You squeeze your eyes shut, a little embarrassed by the dirty idea that had you flipping around in bed like an animal. Something in particular you two hadn’t tried yet. “I want— I want you to…”
“Tell me, sweet thing. Taught you better than to mumble, didn’t I?” You shudder, feeling his hands wander around your hips to the top of your thighs. He was getting close, but not right on the money.
You were really going to have to say it out loud.
A tight squeeze on your hips has your eyes fluttering open again, and he was so close you could see a little bit of him now. His usually unfairly fluffy hair is a little smushed down from where he’d been pressed into the pillow, and his eyes were half lidded, flitting between your eyes and where your hips met his. He was picture perfect like this— the dimmed image making you remember all the reasons you fell in love with him in the first place.
He squeezes you again, giving you a sly grin, and your mind switches from the romantic to a little more serious.
“I want your mouth.” You manage to say in a breathy gasp, and you’re rewarded with just that. He groans in approval, the vibration against your neck making you keen closer to him. He leaves wet kisses over your marked up neck, then down lower over your collarbone.
“Like this?” He says softly, and you can feel the smirk against your chest.
“No.”
“No?” He pulls back, and you groan— frustrated.
“Wait— yes. But… not like— that. Like…”
“Out with it. Now.” He says, and then smacks your ass like he’s encouraging a horse to trot. The action sparks a little fire in your stomach, and you push him in a show of strength. Your forearm shoves his chest lightly, sending him back into the headboard with a small but audible ‘oof.’
“I want to sit on your face.” You’re met with silence.
Joel’s wandering hands still on your bare skin, and if you really concentrate you can feel his stuttered pulse under his palms. The man who never freezes, never doesn’t know what to do— you left him completely speechless.
Your gut sinks. You think you’ve made him think you’re some kind of sex fiend, or worse— you’ve made him uncomfortable. You sit in the silence for two… three… four whole seconds before it all becomes too much and you try to backtrack.
“Hold on— wait, that came out of nowhere.” No, it did not. “I just… shit, Joel I just—“
“Fuck.” He mutters, and then slams his mouth to yours. He kisses you hot and heavy, and before you know it he’s laying down and you’re hovering over the top of him, your knees over his hips. “You sweet fuckin’ thing. Come ‘ere.”
“Joel, you don’t have t—“
“You want this, baby?” Figuring there’s no going back now, and the mere idea nearly sending your mind into a dizzy spell, you nod at him. “Good. Fuck— so good. I want it. Come here.”
He shuffles further underneath you, your legs feeling like jelly the second he hooks his arms around the backs of them. You gasp and nearly topple over when he yanks you up, and you have to hold onto the headboard when Joel’s shoulders part your legs further.
When you tentatively move higher, you shudder his name when his hot breath brushes over your core. It rushes over your sensitive inner thighs, and knowing he’s so close— so close, and no part of you could hide from him… it was nearly better than the actual thing. Nearly.
That was until he strained his neck up and kissed between your legs right there, and—
“Fuck, Joel!” You cried out, probably loud enough to alert anyone in the area to your location, and Joel fucking laughs. You know, because the sensation only doubles as he smiles and repeats the slow motion, tongue wrapping around your clit while his mouth slowly follows.
“Sit, baby.” He mumbles into you, and you suck in a breath, still hovering slightly over him. You don’t want to crush the man, but if you hold here any longer your legs will give out.
He doesn’t bother fighting you, just wraps his arms further around your legs and tugs you down, smothering himself between your legs so deep you don’t think he can even breath properly.
He isn’t one for wasting time, his mouth already working you open as his tongue tastes you from the new angle, and you know he looks up at your dazed expression because his nose brushes against your clit. You cry out again, and there’s a loud smack before you realise it’s his hands grabbing at your ass again, holding you down.
He groans, and it’s amazing you hear it over your own desperate little noises. It’s impossible to be quiet, Joel downright devouring every inch of you, and you have no choice but to just sit there and let him. It’s fucking earth shattering— your knuckles going white as they tighten around the wooden frame of the headboard. His tongue slides through your folds again, and when he finds that sensitive spot again, your hips buck against his face.
“Yeah— fuck. That’s it.” You hear him say, and then he’s sending an entirely new wave of pleasure up your spine, leaving you breathless for anything else but his name.
“Joel. Joel!” You say in a higher tone than you thought possible. He just groans into you again. The soft scratch of his beard against your thighs is dull compared to the sharpness of the pleasure jabbing you closer and closer to the edge.
His tongue wraps around your clit, the warmth of his mouth making your already limited vision blur into nothing, and then you all but collapse into the headboard in front of you. You don’t know if he can breathe, but he’s holding you so tightly to him and eating you out with such fucking aggression that you don’t even think he cares. He drives you crazy— switching between lapping at your core and fucking you with his mouth, never seeming to decide on a way he wants to taste you, and all it does is bring you to your peak and yank you back just as you’re about to fall.
He knows what he’s doing, too. He loves hearing it in your voice— when you pant all brokenly, when you beg him to give you something, anything, when you offer whatever he asks as long as he just lets you cum. You know what he wants to hear, and at this point, with his tongue inside of you, you’d give him whatever. Whatever he asked for.
“Joel— p-please. I can’t…” You whine as he begins to slow down again, and you can feel that ember of orgasm still alight, growing dimmer and dimmer as he pulls away. “Joel! Joel, fucking hell— please!”
“Shh, baby. It’s okay— you’re so fucking gorgeous like this.” He soothes, his hands going soft as they knead at your hips. “You taste too good, sweet thing. Got me distracted. You just want to cum for me, don’t you?”
“P-please…” It’s fucking pathetic, and he laughs, but this time it’s not as mocking.
“Good girl. Such a good girl, aren’t you?” Incoherent babbles fill the small room in your voice as he returns his mouth to you, but not before he spits into your pussy, and lets you hear just how wet you are for him and only him.
When he flattens his tongue and lets you ride his face, you know he won’t stop this time. He’s all encouragement— hands pushing your hips to grind on him, focusing his mouth on the parts he knows make you cum quick and easy when it’s him, and he’s groaning so much you think he’s enjoying this just as much as you are.
Just as you think you’re going to cum, one of his hands disappear. You only feel it because it gives you just enough room to sink lower and practically trap Joel under your legs. You look over your shoulder and see him fist his cock in his hand, and that’s what pushes you over.
You let the pleasure wash over you, any concern about your weight on top of his face melting away as an intense heat strokes up and down your entire body, making your toes curl. It’s too intense to stay upright, your chest falling forward into the headboard, and Joel mutters something but you’re too blissed out to hear it.
Your hands begin to hurt with how hard your gripping the split wood, and when you let go you nearly collapse over him. Thankfully, Joel has shuffled up slightly so his head is on the pillows, so as your legs give out you land more towards you chest. He catches you easily and helps you lay back down, your legs completely numb as he tangles you back into him and the sheets.
His face nuzzles yours, nose against your cheek as he peppers kisses in its wake. When you turn to kiss him, you can taste yourself on his tongue, and your body shudders again, the aftershocks of one of the most intense orgasms you’ve ever had still racketing your limp body.
When you gain back all your consciousness, you can feel how hard Joel’s breathing is as he ticks you back against him, similar to how you started the night. At first, you think you must have suffocated him, but when he pushes his leg between your thighs, you feel the absence of boxers, and then you realise.
“Joel, did you—“
“Shh.” He mumbles into your hair and kisses the top of your head, and you can’t help but feel warm all over again. You shut your eyes, picturing the image you have of his hand slipping under his boxers, jacking off to the sight and feeling of giving you head. “Sleep, baby. Long ride home tomorrow.”
You hum in agreement, but every time you close your eyes, it’s all you can see. Biting your lip, you slip your arm over his waist, tugging him closer.
When you feel him harden against your stomach, you don’t think either of you will be sleeping much tonight.
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scientia-rex · 28 days
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I feel like disappointment in Biden is baffling to me because he was always a disappointment. He was the asshole who got to ride to power on the coattails of a better man. He told bizarre and repeated lies (despite getting caught at it and his team telling him not to) about having a Welsh coal miner dad when he did not and he stole that story from actual Welsh people. I read a profile of him years back that pointed this out and told the story of the time he straight up ignored good advice from an expert not to plant a certain kind of tree too close together and flew a bunch of them out to plant, at night because he was just too fucking excited about it, and they all died. He’s not a smart man! He’s charismatic ish and lacks principles and as far as I can tell doesn’t really care about abortion rights or a lot of things we’d consider pretty critical to preserving freedom. I sincerely thought he couldn’t become President because there were so many obviously better candidates in the pool. I underestimated the sexism and antisemitism in American politics, and when he became the candidate in 2020 I gritted my teeth and voted for him because the alternative was a man who is not only an idiot but also profoundly dangerous. Trump is not ha-ha crazy, he’s Mussolini crazy. He is not dangerous because he’s stupid, although that doesn’t help; he’s dangerous because he does not care about anyone except himself under any circumstances and if that means he lets the far right push us straight into forced birth for white women and sterilization for women of color he’s going to do that. If that means conversion therapy for queers and death penalty for homosexual acts he’s going to do that. He has literally no limits. If he gets back into power, a whole lot of people are going to die, again. It’s not a hypothetical because it happened the first time and he’s only going to get worse.
I am not, never have been, and never will be a fan of Biden. To pretend that he and Trump are in any way equivalent is wrong at best and another goddamn Russian psy-op at worst. To pretend that a third party candidacy is viable in the US is to completely ignore every election of your lifetime and your parents’ lifetimes, and to further ignore the lesson of Ross Perot.
You cannot save Palestinians by not voting for Biden in November; the best you can do is chip away at his margin, and the worst you can do is see Trump elected so he can decide to do the worst possible thing in ever circumstance. Biden has Palestinian blood on his hands and watching this when we could have had Bernie or Elizabeth Warren instead is maddening. (I would have preferred Hillary to Trump, but I don’t think she’d be any different than Biden here. They’re both old-school politicians.)
I hate everything about this, and I hate that saying “maybe don’t put the man who literally said he would kill his political enemies in power” is seen as supporting genocide. It’s acknowledging reality. Joe Biden as a person can eat rocks for all I care. I was kind of hoping he’d die sooner in his term so we’d have time to get used to and then vote for President Harris. (Remember when the line was “she’s a cop, don’t vote for her”? Funny how there’s always a reason not to vote for a woman or a person of color or someone you just “don’t like” and can’t put a finger on why except she “seems angry.” Oh does she. How would she not? When Michelle fucking Obama, the picture of grace , STILL got called angry for having the nerve to be a Black woman with an opinion? When Hillary Clinton lost to a man with no political experience to her decades and who openly discussed sexually assaulting women? Would you have voted for President Harris? Or would you let Trump win again because you don’t LIKE her personally and she’s made decisions and statements you disagree with?)
Biden has both less power than his critics give him credit for and more power than his fans give him credit for. He needs to do more to pressure Israel and although it’s a delicate diplomatic situation I’d rather see us fuck up our diplomatic relationship with Israel than watch more Palestinians get murdered for things like “wanting to eat” and “existing.” The line has been crossed, and he doesn’t see it. Because he wasn’t the best person for the job. Because they didn’t get elected, because of sexism/antisemitism/racism. Hell, I have no idea what bootlicker Pete Buttegieg would have done here, but I’d have given him a try. But no. We got Biden and we’re stuck with this reality where you can be as leftist as you want and still have to look at the situation and decide whether you’re comfortable contributing to a Trump victory through inaction. I want socialism—I want every single person on Earth to have clean drinking water, enough safe food, shelter, medical care, and education—and I’m going to vote for Biden, pissy as it makes me, because the only actual alternative is so, so much worse, for me personally as both a woman and a queer, and for everyone in America and the rest of the world who Trump would find reasons to hurt. What do you think the man who openly and repeatedly praises dictators is going to do when those dictators massacre their own people? Yes, we need to care about this genocide now. We also need to care about all of the other people who are at real risk, both at home and abroad. Would a Trump government agree to fund military intervention in Haiti without insisting on it being a colonial exercise in power? Would a Trump government roll back the restrictions on discriminating against transgender patients in healthcare? How would Trump respond if Orban started dragging people into the streets and shooting them en masse? How would Trump respond if China finally went for it and invaded Taiwan? There are more lives at stake here than mine or yours or even those of the Palestinians, who have deserved better for literally decades and are being mass killed in ways that should result in immediate sanctions, a war crimes trial, and the execution of Netanyahu.
The world deserves better from you than complicity in a Trump victory.
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moonit3 · 7 months
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GOOD BOY
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➥ warnings/notices: yandere, nsfw, smut, handjob, teasing, reader calls max a good boy, ruined climaxes, doing it at a bathroom of a fraternity, dominant! reader, submissive! yandere, gender neutral reader, pervert! reader.
➥ yandere! nerd x gn! reader
➥ synopsis: you and max inside a bathroom of a fraternity house. ;)
➥ a/n: people love submissive yandere boys, right? so im here to feed you guys with mad being himself and reader controlling him. i didn’t expect to get more than 150 followers in the recently days, but thank so much for it, guys (*'▽'*) i have many projects that i want to show you all, so keep an eye out.
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off all the things max thought of doing in a friday night, he never expected to have you kissing him at a frat party inside one the bathroom of the fraternity with you stocking his cock.
“max~” you whisper his name, moving your hand up and down around his member while kneeling in the front of his member and he is holding back his moans by using his hand to cover his mouth. “are you enjoying it? do you want more of it?”
the loud songs of party can easily muffle the moans that max is holding back, but he keeps it quiet in order to prevent to become a mess to your eyes, so he nods. i want more, [name]! his hip began moving on his own, trying to finish this torture that you have put him. always reaching his limit and when he is ready to release, you stop touching him, always ruining his climax, just to do it again and again.
his cock is trembling under your touch, begging to be released after minutes of being stimulated over and over, only to not be relived to your entertainment. you are enjoying this more than you want to admit, it’s was more than worth paying the household members to let max entered the party.
“you want to come, don’t you?” you trace your finger to the tip of his cock, feeling how pressure its hold and knowing how much fun is holding it back. “so say it. say that you want to come like a good boy, max.”
you are humiliating him, of course you are doing it to your own pleasure, but it’s clear that max is also enjoying the way you are treating him and he wants more of it.
he removes his hands away from his lips, letting whimpering escape his mouth and mostly of his words are your name, begging to let him release all of his load after spending so long being teased for your happiness. “p-please let me come, i can’t hold anymore! please, [name], im a good boy, i am—“ too late, he has already come.
the enormous amount of his cum dirty not only your hands, but your face complete. the white fluids are over you hair, eyes and of course, your tongue, letting you take a taste of his liquid. it is a little to sticky than you expected. with you licking as much of possible to taste mad, he is taking deep breathes to recompose himself from the he thinks to be the most exhausting, but also greatest, pleasure that he have experienced.
you did it, you made him come so much! max can’t wait to do it again with you. in fact, he already has in mind of what you two might do together at his place.
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@moonit3 writings
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i'd sigh in bliss, even while drowning, if only it was your hand holding me under; your kiss is the most violent death i've ever known.
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qh43 x reader: let's take this bitter tension on the water, shall we?
(warnings: blasphemous filth, unprotected penetrative sex (m on f), fingering, hair pulling (have you guys seen his hair, recently?), choking (it's really been too long. too many nice guys), talking (he brings out the best in me), tears (or the worst idk), lots and lots and lots of miscommunication and tension and being kinda mean, obviously i'm forgetting things but all my usual stuff.  please be warned, don’t read if you’re not 100% sure.)
(a/n: thank you for waiting, my favorites. i give you qh43 x doll (on deck). this idea has taken me a long time to flesh out, with lots of work and outlining and such, so i really hope you enjoy. i told myself it was going to be short and it ended up being 16.5k, because i have no self control. i guess i was just in the mood to write angst-filled argument after angst-filled argument, given all the sweet boy content i've been putting out recently (don't worry, that will be back soon enough). and qh43 is my go-to for the sad stuff, for the fights and kisses in the rain (literally, this time). can you tell i was listening to taylor's is it really over? way too much and thought... what if it wasn't? over, that is? obviously, none of this makes any logistical sense, you guys know this. thank you for reading anyways. let's see, what else? loving the nico slut headcanon i'm committing to. also love a good mt19 gap-tooth takeover (is he not the perfect cruise ship fling?). and luke is here, too, for all the people telling me to write for him. i'm sorry, i know the miscommunication trope is frustrating and the one-bed trope is cliche. please, for the love of god, take this as a sign to be clear with people about how you feel. life is too short. i have like one billion baby stories started right now, so we will see for which inspiration proves most fruitful. will it be golf pro cc22 x bevcart girl? geology ta js1 x classics ta? the tj17 one i've been trying to finish forever? none of the above? we'll see. pretty, pretty please, tell me what you think. go canucks (dare i say cup-bound), tell your snakes i love them. until next time. love, always).
as much as you wanted to be completely and purely excited for this little excursion, as much as you wanted this to be a truly undiluted celebration of your best friend's wedding next weekend, something was standing in your way.
"c'mon," the bride-to-be, savannah, said, standing on the pier next to you as you gazed out at the obscenely massive cruise ship, its numerous windows like the eyes of a spider, much too many and much too close together, "you've worked so hard, babe." she gave you a tight side-hug, which you returned. "you've made this whole process so easy, hm? let loose for a weekend, and then, i promise, you can go right back to being the militant maid of honor you are."
you let out a short laugh, let your shoulders settle back into place. "thanks for this weekend, sav," you said. "it's gonna be great." she was right, of course, in some ways, and wrong in others.
you had worked hard, very, very hard, because you cared about savannah, loved her like a sister, and you wanted her wedding to be one of dreams. you liked jack, her fiance, a lot, too, and you liked them together, saw how they brought out the best in each other.
it had been months of making sure everything during the planning process went over smoothly, of being there for savannah when the world felt like it was ending, when the pressure of a wedding felt like it was insurmountable.
when bridesmaids had a little too much to say about their dresses, or when family members had a little too much to say about their hotel arrangements, or when savannah herself had a little too much to say about how it just had to be perfect, you were there, mitigating the worries and stressors and potential problems.
it had been a rewarding but draining couple of months.
savannah had seen that, had appreciated you even more because of it, so her and jack had planned this mini-vacation as a thank you for both of their wedding parties. the big day was next week, so this was supposed to be a final relaxing deep breath before the inevitable whirlwind of white lace and dress shoes and pink flowers.
and it would be relaxing, you were sure of it, you wouldn't let it not be, if only because your best friend wanted it to be so adamantly. it would be a perfect weekend vacation, the perfect cruise getaway, the perfect source of pre-wedding bliss.
it would be, it would be all of these things, as long as you stayed as far away from quinn hughes as was humanly possible.
the brother of the groom, the best man, your counterpart in the wedding, whom you had been fairly successful in avoiding whenever possible, all things considered. you'd been in the same friend group for years, after all, since the end of college. years of averted glances, charged comments that you pretended to ignore, of memories that left your cheeks hot and anger hotter.
you hadn't had a major blowout with him yet, and you were confident enough in your self-control to believe you wouldn't start now. you'd never been confined on a boat with him before, though, hadn't been stuck in a room with him without an escape plan, so that would present a new challenge.
what was every day in the periphery of quinn, though, if not a new challenge? a challenge more devastatingly taxing with each passing moment?
as you and your best friend boarded the ship together, you hoped that you could postpone seeing him for as long as possible. maybe if you stayed in your room the whole weekend, you wouldn't have to see him at all. wouldn't that be fun?
savannah dropped her stuff and told you she was going to find jack, leaving you to unpack your things and enjoy some moments of silence before what would surely be a tornado of a weekend.
unfortunately, as you folded your clothes and organized them in drawers, your mind wandered, with nothing to focus on but your anxieties. your anxiety, personified, in a broad, shaggy-haired, soft-featured best man.
you sighed, as you often did when you thought of quinn, because no, it hadn't always been this way. there had been a single, lovely, dreamy night during which the two of you hadn't hated each other. quite the opposite, actually.
it felt sort of unfair that, even now, years later, he could still evoke such a visceral feeling in you, a kind of hatred you felt in your stomach, a kind of shame that rattled through your skull, a regret that set your chest ablaze. and as much as it pained you to think it, it felt sort of unfair that savannah was getting married to jack, because you had known quinn first. it had been you and quinn, first.
it had been you and quinn, both of you at the just-off-campus bar alone, waiting for your respective friends to show up. you had spotted him across the room, his pretty face made so angelic by the hazy neon light. he had spotted you too, had been so unapologetic about letting his gaze settle in the pockets of your exposed collarbones, then flickering up to meet your careful eyes slowly, heatedly.
it had been you and quinn, in a back booth, once he'd bought you a beer and motioned for you to join him, a precise but easy tilt of his head in invitation. on that waxy bench seat, as time passed, you grew much closer together than you could have made a real excuse for, until the outside of your thigh was pressed up against his, until he angled his shoulder back so you could lean your side on his chest, until there was really no question as to where the night was going to go. where it was going to end.
until he rewrote the script you'd assumed into place, too, because when you talked with him for that hour or so, drinks practically forgotten on the table, friends absolutely forgotten, he wasn't like the one-night-onlys you'd had in the past.
he was pretty, sure, almost embarrassingly so, but he spoke to you so gently, with such care, it stunned you.
when he asked you about your day, you were shocked to find completely genuineness in his gaze.
when you asked about his friends, when they were showing up, you couldn't help but feel a little endeared by his short laugh. "athletes," he told you, then, "most unreliable people on the planet, doll, swear it."
it had been you and quinn, basically melting into each other, in that booth, and it had been you and quinn, at his place, after. when you'd discovered that he tasted like something citrusy, maybe grapefruit, from whatever he'd been drinking, when you'd felt his rough hands on your face, your hips, when his voice had grown low and husky and brutal, barely pausing for even a moment when he pushed into you for the first time, so overwhelmingly deep and hard.
he'd been so gentle, yet undeniable, so tender, but he'd said things that now made you blush.
he'd been the best fuck of your life, somehow also the kind of person you'd truly, genuinely, been able to see yourself developing a relationship with. you'd thought he was a once in a lifetime kind of person.
you'd left his place early that morning to get to class, kissed his shoulder softly in goodbye while he slept soundly.
little did you know that, that next night, savannah would meet jack, who was out with quinn. as such, savannah would introduce you to jack.
"this is my brother, quinn," jack would say to you, eventually, and your eyes would soften at the sight of him as you turned.
you would open your mouth to say something along the lines of oh, we've already met, but then quinn would extend a hand to you.
"nice to meet you," he'd say, stony, cold, and you'd narrow your eyes, search his gaze for anything humorous, come up empty. surely he remembered you, right? it was almost worse to imagine that he did remember, that he just didn't want his brother to know about you. it was almost worse to imagine that he thought you were something to be hidden.
so you'd swallow a breath that felt like a forbidden pill, stare at his outstretched hand with something like disgust.
"yeah, you too," you'd bite out, your hands remaining at your sides, hoping his empty hand felt awkward enough to hurt. "really nice."
so, as much as it had been you and quinn, starry-eyed in a back booth, as much as it had been you and quinn, tangled up in each other as your eyelids grew heavy with sleep, as much as it had been you and quinn, first -
it had also been you, embarrassed and ashamed, and quinn, expressionless and indifferent.
so, what did that night really matter, however life-altering you had thought it to be? he obviously didn't feel the same way. you obviously meant nothing to him.
you had thought that to be a very disappointing end to a chapter. you were ready to move on, but, of course, savannah and jack only grew closer. of course, your friend groups merged. of course, it seemed like you couldn't go more than a few days without an especially painful reminder of exactly how much you weren't wanted, exactly how mistaken you had been.
it had been several years now, and you'd gotten a little better at hiding your feelings, sure, but you wouldn't describe your relationship with quinn as civil. certainly not amicable.
you were both known to have an especially short temper when it came to the other, to become inexplicable hot-headed in their presence. still, no one, not even savannah, you assumed not even jack, knew exactly why. they just assumed you didn't get along. that you were just completely incompatible as people, probably.
now, you took a deep breath, putting the last of your clothes away, zipping up your suitcase and stowing it under your bed. you wouldn't let him ruin this trip for you, you decided in a moment. you would be kind, and lovely, and you'd enjoy the time with your best friends. everything was going to be fine. everything was going to be perfect.
this was the mindset you were carrying with you when you finally made to join everyone else on the deck for a welcome happy hour.
you quickly spotted your group, immediately locking eyes with your other best friend, lexi, who must have just arrived.
she squealed and pulled you in for a hug. "it's been too long," she whined, and you laughed.
"i missed you," you said, and you meant it. for the longest time, it had been you, savannah, and lexi, a trio for the majority of your time at university. guys came and went (for the most part), your circle expanded into friends from classes and clubs and sororities and such, but the three of you were inseparable.
it still felt weird that you didn't get to see them every day, with all of you at different places, some working, some in school. it felt weird that the real world still spun even if you three weren't cackling on the way into a lecture, whispering about lacrosse boy when he walked into a party, whining about midterms in the dining hall. it felt weird to grow up.
"i want to hear about school," you said as you pulled away from her embrace. "tell me everything."
"what, no hug for me, eh?"
you rolled your eyes, immediately recognizing that overconfident voice as jack's best friend.
"hello, nico," you said, sugary-sweet, mustering up a smile. "how's daddy's money treating you?" you didn't like nico, not really, found that he hadn't changed at all since school.
nico wasn't like quinn, though, he never took what you said in a heavy way. he just laughed, and his eyes shone with it. "business is thriving, thanks for asking," he said.
"so humble," came quinn's grumbly voice, somewhere on the line between light-hearted fun and genuine disapproval. you wondered briefly if nico had any more luck reading quinn than you did.
"oh, that's what they say," nico responded, running a hand through his longer dark hair. "the humblest around."
you caught up with lexi about medical school, learned it was somehow even more draining than she expected.
"i wouldn't be able to tell for a second," you assured her, gesturing to your face. "you look insanely well-rested. glowing, practically."
lexi waved you off, but she looked pleased. "don't lie," she chastised, "i wake up everyday and look like i got run over by a truck."
she told you about her classes, and her classmates, and her professors, and you listened intently, always interested to hear about situations you had no experience in.
"sounds hectic," you said, finally, blowing out a breath.
"eh, you know how it is," she responded with a shrug. just then, luke, jack's younger brother, arrived, looking especially disheveled, but you knew him well enough by now to understand that was just how he looked.
he was greeted with hugs and handshakes by everyone.
"you're so big, now," you said, almost teasingly, as you pulled him in for a hug.
he swatted at you, good-naturedly. "lay off, would you?" he said, but when he smiled it was genuine. "not a baby."
you knocked your hip against his, anyways. "happy you're here," you told him.
out of all of jack's groomsmen, you supposed luke was the clear frontrunner for your favorite. nico, the narcissistic playboy, was out of the running, and so was quinn, for obvious reasons.
even without those two, though, you'd developed a soft spot for the youngest of the hugheses. he was a couple of years your junior, but surprisingly mature and well-spoken. he was into football, like you were, too, and had invited you to join his fantasy league before he even knew you that well. now, years later, he came to you for girl advice and you thought of him as the younger brother you never had.
"me, too," luke responded, his eyes alight. when you looked away from him, however, you felt another gaze on your side like a blistering burn, were barely surprised to find quinn's rocky eyes on your side, somewhere between your hip and waist.
his attention sparked something dangerously flammable inside of you, an anger that felt like being coated in lighter fluid.
if quinn had been beautiful the day you'd met him, he was devastating, now, having aged in a subtle way that only enhanced his features, made his jaw sharper, cheekbones more prominent. his hair was a soft shag of brown, curling onto his forehead, at the nape of his neck, the tops of his ears. he'd filled out a bit, too, wider in the chest, softer in the middle. if you had to describe to someone your type, you figured you'd get maybe ten seconds in before realizing you were just describing quinn.
now, his eyes met yours in a clash of flame and ancient rock, immovable and disastrous.
coward, you seemed to say without words, mean, rude, coward.
and, as always, he seemed to say absolutely nothing.
you were being kind, though, you were being lovely, so you just rolled your eyes and made to join savannah and lexi as they chatted by the bar.
the sun set over the distant sky line, making the sea ripple purple and orange as music played from the deck, as more and more people seemed to gather, as drinks flowed easier and voices grew louder.
you caught up with luke about his last year of school, listened to nico talk about his last girlfriend (who he insisted was really, truly crazy, as he had claimed about the last girl, and the one before that), asked jack about how work was going and savannah how her cats were doing. you were including everyone, you were being a wonderful maid of honor, you were being kind and lovely, all while quinn remained oddly quiet, talking only when directly addressed, every now and then looking at you with an intensity that made you dizzy.
what are you doing? you wanted to scream at him, you're not allowed to look at me!
he didn't seem to particularly care about your unspoken wishes, anyways, though you supposed he never had. he just took small sips from his fruity cocktail, and you pretended not to notice how it made his pouty lips more pink, like he was wearing a shimmery gloss. you hated yourself for the way your stomach flipped at the sight.
"so, how's your week been, q?" luke asked him, eventually, taunting him with a smile. "awfully quiet over there. what're you hiding?"
and you shouldn't have done it, it was not very lovely and kind of you, but you gave a light scoff at this. because you knew just how good quinn was a hiding things. people, even.
of course, he noticed. he seemed to notice just about everything, when it came to you, ever the perceptive observer. it was something you'd adored about him, for a night.
"what?" quinn bit out, and he wasn't looking at luke, instead looking directly at you. "got something to say, doll?"
you felt your eye twitch, only just barely, because out of all of his mannerisms and actions that drove you absolutely crazy, this one might be your least favorite. how, after all this time, he still rarely called you anything but doll.
how, now, it was said with such condescending distaste, when it had once been 'm dyin' to kiss you, doll, murmured in a bedroom doorframe. when it had once been give me one more, doll, hm? be good for me, hot against your temple.
"nothing, quinn," you said, with a smile that felt more similar to baring teeth, his name some malicious hex. "don't worry about it."
there was a brief pause charged with meaning, his slate-like eyes boring into yours.
you were the first to look away, to look down at your hand before he finally answered luke's question, went into some noncommittal explanation about work.
eventually, somehow, the conversation veered towards wedding dates.
"wait," savannah said, pausing as if having trouble understanding. "you're telling me that out of all of you, both wedding parties, the only one with a plus-one is luke? and it's not even a date?"
"mackie still counts," luke said, shrugging. "no one said we weren't allowed to bring friends."
"regardless," savannah said, exasperated. "how did this happen?"
nico grinned. "not all of us can be so easily tied down, sav," he said with a wink, to which you and lexi groaned.
"oh, what?" nico retorted, looking at the two of you, "if it really matters, i'll bring a date. hell, i'll bring four dates."
you shook your head vigorously. "do not bring four dates. please do not bring four dates."
"do not make our wedding an episode of the bachelor, nico," savannah warned. "but you guys should bring someone!" her eyes grew wide with excitement. "you could even find someone on the boat!"
lexi whistled.
"do we really want a bunch of strangers at our wedding?" jack mused, joking.
"oh, hush," savannah said, laying a hand on his forearm.
he smiled. "you're right," he conceded, "not like this lot could find dates anyways."
the only people who seemed especially opposed to jack's judgement were nico and lexi.
you just shrugged. you didn't really want to bring a date to the wedding, because you didn't have a serious boyfriend, right now, and you didn't want to invite someone you weren't serious about. you could find a date, sure, it wouldn't be too hard, but that would just be another person to entertain for a night during which you were already going to be pulled in a million different directions.
"okay, so lex and nico are going to find dates," savannah said, then turned to you, "what about you?"
"i'm good, sav," you said, plainly, cordially, with a smile that she returned. you knew that she just wanted you to be happy, and that it probably hurt her to imagine you lonely.
"or you, quinn?" savannah continued.
you fixed your eyes on him, too, as did the rest of the table. as much as you maybe shouldn't have been, you were straining to hear his answer.
"yeah, didn't you say you were thinking of bringing someone? what was her name, again?" jack asked, snapping his fingers as if trying to summon his memory.
terrible envy bubbled through your veins, thick and green, at the mention of quinn wanting someone who wasn't you. at the reminder that he was fully capable of wanting someone, he just hadn't wanted you.
quinn's eyes flashed with something dangerous. "i never told you i was thinking of bringing someone," he told his brother, sounding almost annoyed, his tone sharp.
jack's half-smile told you he knew something you didn't. "my bad," he said, "must've forgotten."
quinn's full mouth twitched to the side, almost undetectable, but of course you noticed. he looked almost angry that jack had suggested that he bring a date. there was the faintest pink across his nose, too, as if he was almost embarrassed.
something heavy settled in your chest, made your throat tight, because you knew what it was like to be embarrassed in a group. to want something so adamantly and have it go the other way in front of your eyes.
as if pulled by some magnetic force, some power fueled by history and shed tears, quinn's eyes briefly met yours, like you were the calm in some hurricane, like you tethered him to the world. for a second, you remembered just what it felt like to be his. just how consuming it was.
but you weren't his, you reminded yourself. so, of course, the anger followed, along with a bloodthirsty self-loathing at your momentary protection of him, your fleeting feelings of sympathy.
you weren't his, and yet he was looking at you now like he was begging you to do something.
"you know what, sav?" you said, although you were looking right at quinn, "changed my mind. think i'll bring a date, actually."
it was quinn's turn to scoff, which had rage rolling in your head like high tide. "yeah, right," he said. "you haven't been with someone in years, doll."
you furrowed your brow, because that just wasn't true, flat out. did quinn actually think you hadn't been with guys since you'd had him?
lexi was the one to laugh. "what're you on about, quinn?" she said. "what planet have you been living on?"
"you think i call you up as soon as i scratch another notch in my bedpost?" you asked, incredulous. "course i've been with guys."
a million emotions rumbled through his eyes like a slow-building earthquake, which made realization spark in your head.
"unless," you started, "unless you haven't been with-"
"i'll bet that you don't end the weekend with a date, then," quinn said, cutting you off as you'd gotten dangerously close to saying something incriminating, something he didn't want others to know.
it took no convincing from you to agree to his bet, even if nico and luke were nudging you on. "you're on," you said, your voice lower than you anticipated.
he hummed, ran his tongue along the inside of his cheek, cocked his head in a way that made your nerves spring to life. "and what do i get when i win?"
he said the words like he knew exactly how you'd take them. in a way that made everything else fade away, for a moment, made you forget your audience of friends, made the music lull to a halt in your ears, made the massive deck of this boat feel altogether too small.
"what do you want?" you asked, almost blushed at how rough your voice sounded, promptly cleared your throat again.
his heavy gaze dropped to your mouth, making warning sirens blare in your head. making you so, so angry.
"decide the terms later," jack said, obviously done with this topic, which really only concerned you and quinn, "deal or no deal?"
quinn extended a hand to you in answer, which you stared at for a second, suddenly delirious with deja vu. remembering when he had last went looking for a handshake.
this time, though, you took it, squeezed it so tight you hoped it hurt, although he didn't even wince, held eye contact with you the entire time.
"eager to lose, eh, doll?" he asked, his eyes shining.
"you know me," you said, then, "just so eager." knowing exactly how he would take it. in a way that had his eyes glazing over, just a bit, perhaps had phantom breaths of please, quinn, give me all of it echoing in his mind.
and so your weekend getaway began with a wager.
still, you didn't want your heightening anger towards quinn to take over your vacation, so, the following day, you went about your way as you had been planning on.
you ate breakfast with lexi, explored the boat with sav and luke, finally settled down to read by the pool in the late afternoon.
the sun was bright and big in the sky, so you untied the straps of your swimsuit, so as to avoid tan lines. time passed as you flipped pages, engrossed in your book, until you felt the heat on your body like a scratchy sweater.
at some point, you felt a figure next to you, a big body with a face you couldn't see until you brought a hand up to shield your eyes.
the man blocking the sun from you was a little jarring in his beauty, you realized. handsome in a very different way than what you were usually attracted to. he had curly, curly hair, almost red in the light, a symmetrical face, a prominent gap in his two front teeth that you had the sneaking suspicion he used to his advantage.
he had you smiling up at him, nonetheless. "can i help you, handsome?" you asked.
his mouth quirked at your words as his features settled into a theatrical expression. "you're sweet, princess, but i was actually hoping to help you."
you hummed, bent one knee up until the sole of your foot rested flat on your lounge chair. "were you, now?" maybe this whole finding a wedding date business was going to be even easier than you initially thought.
the handsome stranger squatted down until his hips rested back on his heels, until he was eye level with you. like he didn't want to look down at you. like you were even lovelier head on. he raised a wide hand to one side of his mouth, as if telling you some great secret at a cafeteria lunch table. "just wanted to warn you that your straps are untied," he whispered, gesturing with his other hand to his own shoulders. his smirk told you that he knew it was intentional.
you made no move to retie them, let out a small laugh. "my knight in shining armor, hm?"
his shoulders rose and fell in a telling chuckle. "either that or i just wanted an excuse to come over here," he said. "'m matthew."
"'m flattered, matthew," you said, then gave him your own name. "you don't seem like a guy who needs an excuse, though."
his smirk grew wide. "what do i seem like, then, princess?"
you tilted your head to the side, thought for a moment. "don't know," you admitted, "got the smile of a charmer, though, give you that."
matthew appeared about to respond, but was cut off by the approach of a figure to the other side of your chair, standing at full height, looking down at you and your new acquaintance.
a figure you'd know in the dark, a presence you'd sense while unconscious. quinn drew both of your attention, but said nothing. you pursed your lips.
"what's up, man?" said matthew, maybe a little unsure, in a tone that sort of felt like he was making fun of quinn. "all good?" he didn't push back up to his full height, which you found hilarious and endearing. how he didn't seem even the tiniest bit threatened by quinn, when it was so painfully obvious that he was trying so hard to appear threatening.
you peered up at him, found his blatant discomfort and indecision especially unsettling. "what do you want, quinn?" you asked, annoyance creeping into your voice like moss on a damp rock.
"you know this guy?" matthew said, his grin that of a class clown.
"do you know this guy, doll?" quinn retorted, crossing his arms over his chest, and you rolled your eyes, set your book down beside you.
"quinn, this is matthew," you said, gesturing between the two of them. "matthew, quinn."
quinn didn't move, but matthew's smile grew taunting as he extended his hand out for a handshake.
a handshake that quinn just stared at, briefly, did not make a move to reciprocate, his gaze so solid, relentlessly cold. you could have slapped him, if you didn't have an audience.
matthew just laughed, retracted his hand, finally stood up. "well, i guess i'll be seeing you around, princess," he said, looking right at you.
"until then, matthew," you responded, an easy smile on your face.
he gave you one last charismatic smile before looking to quinn again. "you've been a treat, quinn," he said, little more than a chuckle, raising a hand in goodbye before turning and walking away.
when he was out of ear shot, you looked up at quinn, ignoring the way the sun lit up the high points of his face. "so," you began, dangling one leg off of your chair, pulling the other up to your chest. "when did you officially lose your goddamn mind?"
he scrunched his mouth to the side as if tasting something sour. "haven't gone crazy," he said, basically a grumble, "thought he was bothering you."
you laughed, genuinely, from your stomach.
"what?" he said, and it was sharp, heavy.
"babe, is this guy bothering you?" you said, imitating a comically deep masculine voice before returning to your usual tone. you retied the straps of your swimsuit, not looking at him. "get real. since when do you give a fuck about me?"
he didn't answer, just shifted on his feet slightly, which made the muscles of his thighs tense. you could feel his anger building, looming like some poisonous cloud around the two of you. he was flushed, and you had a feeling it was some lethal combination of embarrassment and fury. it made his eyes almost glow, made his shoulders clench with strain.
"jesus, don't hurt yourself," you said, eyeing the tension that radiated from his body. "not a good look on you."
this made him intimidating, somehow, made the difference in height between the two of you feel substantial, significant. "really, doll?" he said, with a bite that you could taste. history made its stinging presence known between the two of you, made the air sizzle. "don't like me like this?"
you wanted to punch him the stomach, made him hunch over, bring him to your level so he didn't feel so high and mighty. who was he, now, to hint at your history? when he had denied it so grossly before?
you were not the one in the wrong here, you remembered, he was the one who had approached you.
"no," you said, through clenched teeth, "no, quinn, i don't like you jealous."
this seemed to set his anger loose, as you had expected it to, his fists now tight at his sides. "i am not jealous," he said, slowly, almost scarily. "maybe if you weren't showing yourself off like a-"
you stood up, then, your pulse in your ears, your heart in your throat. you laid a warning hand on his chest, the closest you'd been in a long time. "oh, you aren't really about to call me a slut, are you, quinn?" you warned, like a storm siren.
his gaze shot down to your hand before returning to your unwavering eyes again.
"are you?" you pressed, with the strength of practiced patience. he still said nothing, which made you want to pound your fists on his chest, get him to say something, anything. how tired and frustrated you were of his silence. "where do you get off playing tough-guy savior, anyways?" you continued. "you've got no say in who i talk to, just because you've been celibate, apparently, which is absolutely insane-"
"'m not playing anything," was his short response, which had you fuming.
"you're no tough guy, quinn," you said, "you're a coward."
your eyes widened when his smoldered, as he brought a hand up to your face, swiped his warm thumb across your jawline. you would have smacked his hand away, you swore it, but you were lost for a moment, drowning in the touch you'd craved for longer than you cared to admit. "and you're desperate, doll," he breathed, like some terrible caress, "where does that leave us?"
his words barreled through you like a battering ram, cruel and sadistic. because what were you most ashamed of, if not seeming desperate to his indifferent? what were you questioning most, if not where that left you?
it had been you and quinn, first. could you truly say it had ever been over?
he dropped his hand from your face, leaving you cold, lacking, all over again. leaving your breath coming out a little bit short, your lips slightly parted. because as much as his words cut through you like a dagger to the chest, he said them with such softness, such warmth.
making it so painfully clear in your mind just how much you still wanted him, even if he drove you mad. even if he was exactly the reason behind so many of your fears.
"i hate you," you said, but of course you didn't mean it.
"i hate you," he said, but of course he was lying.
your body and mind were still buzzing, practically alight, that night, when sav and jack decided your whole group should go out, try the ship's nightclub on for a few hours.
and you probably would have politely declined, in any other scenario. you didn't go out that much now, not like you did in school, at least. in recent history, you'd found yourself much more attracted to a night in on the couch than a bass-boosted speaker in your ear. however, you supposed, you wouldn't be able to really relax tonight, anyways, not when your blood felt hot in your body, when your fingertips felt as if they were laced with electrical currents.
you felt almost ill with energy, crazed with some awful mixture of shame and desire and annoyance and disgust.
and you sort of hated yourself for how practically demented quinn's touch made you feel, how deranged his undivided attention made you.
it was so, so unfair, and you wished it wouldn't be true. but it was, so you figured you might as well use this energy while you had it, might as well lean heavily into this version of yourself. this version of yourself, whose emotions were blown up, heightened to a magnificent level.
this you, who felt embarrassment like rosy handcuffs around her wrists, who felt want like a leaden crown, satisfaction like a bubbly drink, displeasure like a hand around your neck. who felt danger and challenge like some intoxicating drug.
it was this you who pulled on a tight, short dress, who spent a few more minutes than usual lining and glossing your lips. maybe it wasn't the most level-headed you'd ever been, sure, but you couldn't remember the last time you'd felt so utterly alive.
"holy shit," lexi said when she opened her door, found you waiting to walk down with her, "you look insane."
you smiled. "good insane or insane insane?"
lexi grabbed her small bag and shut the door behind her. "oh, please," she said, waving you off. "almost forgot that you're workin' with all that," she added, which made you laugh.
once the two of you made your way inside, you looked around for your friends, quickly spotted luke sitting at a table with sav and jack.
sav whistled at the two of you as you approached. "holy smokes," she said.
"oh, stop it," lexi teased, making to sit down next to her.
you just leaned on the side of luke's stool, knocked your shoulder into his. "past your bedtime, eh?" you joked.
he rolled his eyes, smiled. "what brings you out of your cave?" he mused. he knew how much it took for you to venture from your room.
you just shrugged. "what if i just wanted to see you?"
he gave a disbelieving shake of his head before tilting it up to look at you head on. "heard you and q had quite the blowout at the pool."
you narrowed your eyes. "wouldn't call it a blowout," you said, and you meant it, because you could have done so much worse. "who told you that, anyways?"
he scoffed. "who do you think?"
you scrunched up your face. you knew how close quinn and luke were, but, somehow, it still surprised you that he had told anyone about what had happened at the pool. it felt weird that, after refusing to acknowledge what had happened between you, he'd tell luke anything about you.
it made you wonder just how much he had disclosed, if luke knew much more than he was letting on.
"what did he tell you?" you asked, curiosity overtaking any of your discipline.
the youngest hughes just gave you a big grin, though, like he'd caught you in something. "i forget," he said, and you hit him lightly on the arm.
you turned your attention back to the table. "where's nico?" you asked, as he was the only one from the group you hadn't really seen that day. you didn't ask where quinn was, even though you really, really wanted to know. was he even here? did he stay in his room, like you had wanted to?
jack gestured vaguely. "haven't seen him since we got here."
"'s probably pretty busy," sav added, "i think the last time i saw him he was up to three wedding dates."
lexi groaned while you hid your face in luke's shoulder for a second.
you sighed, then pushed yourself out of your lean.
"where're you going?" luke asked you.
"to save the feminine population of this cruise ship from hurricane nico," you answered, before patting the top of his head and making for the bar.
the music was louder, away from the tables and closer to the dance floor, crowded with people in bold colors and daring cuts.
you leaned forward on the counter, raised a hand to catch the bartender's attention. the man with the platinum buzzcut nodded to you to signal that he'd be right there.
"how'd you escape your keeper?" a goofy voice said from beside you, and you recognized the confident tone before you even turned.
"good to see you again, matthew," you said, peering up at him with an easy smile. "and i have my ways."
"i don't doubt that, princess, i don't doubt that," he conceded, his grin revealing that gap between his front teeth.
"thanks for waiting," the bartender said, now in front of you two, adjusting his black bowtie. "to drink?"
"two of whatever she's having," matthew said.
"vodka soda, please," you clarified, opening your mouth to protest when matthew wouldn't let you pay.
"let me get this one, hm?" he asked, and he was so steady you knew he wouldn't budge.
you blew out a breath like you were annoyed, but the thought was sweet. "fine," you said, "just this once. thank you."
"anytime," was his immediately reply as the bartender dropped the two glasses in front of each of you.
"thank you," you said to the blonde, eyes searching for his name tag, "elias."
he gave a curt nod in response before being summoned by another patron.
you turned, now leaned your back against the bar counter, crossed an ankle over the other as you again looked at matthew.
"did i mention how beautiful you look?" he said, a lazy smirk on his face, telling you he'd used this line before. it brought a delighted flush to your cheeks, nonetheless.
"that one's a heater," you said, "bet it works on all the girls." you took a sip from your cold glass, found it strong and sharp.
"not all of 'em, apparently," he said, and you let out a laugh.
you chatted pleasantly with matthew for a while, your mission to find nico long forgotten.
fortunately, at some point, you were surprised to see nico himself approach the two of you where you stood, his gait as overconfident as his expression.
"who's this guy?" matthew whispered, his breath hot by your ear as he leaned down. you shivered, could feel his sly smile.
"a clown," you whispered back.
matthew hummed. "you seem to know a lot of those, eh, princess?"
and it shocked you, sort of, how part of you jumped to defend quinn. how part of you wanted to explain to matthew, however stupidly, that quinn wasn't a clown, he wasn't dumb, he wasn't like nico.
what did it matter if this almost stranger thought quinn was an idiot? hadn't he made a fool of himself just today?
"hey, nico," you said, when he was close enough. "meant to look for you." your side glance had you locking eyes with matthew again, warm and inviting. "got distracted."
"no worries at all, no worries at all," nico responded, "i've just been sent over by a certain quinn hughes to see what was going on here, but, as he should have known, i am no errand boy." he gave matthew a knowing look. "and you seem like a great guy." nico's mouth gave an impressed sort of scrunch. "good face, too."
"i like this guy much more," matthew said, elbowing you gently, although you were having a bit of a hard time focusing.
because you'd warned quinn about leaving you be, warned him that he had absolutely and completely forfeited any opinion to be had about your life. and yet, just hours later, apparently, he hadn't learned his lesson.
"where is he?" you bit out, and you had a feeling your smile looked menacing. at least menacing enough to make nico do a double take. "eh, over there," he said, motioning over to the dance floor.
sure enough, your eyes caught on quinn's broad figure, practically indistinguishable from the one close to him, the girl he was dancing with. you rolled your eyes, turned to matthew with sympathy.
he seemed to be anticipating your words, if his slightly disappointed sigh was anything to go by. "well, the keeper calls," he joked, and his easy-going smile made you feel almost sick.
because here was this lovely person, right in front of you, so obvious about his attraction to you. and yet, you were walking away from him. the very thought made anger thrum within you.
"i'm sorry," you said, and it was genuine.
matthew gave a one-shouldered shrug. "don't be," he said, "i'm lucky i even got to see you in that dress." he winked at you before turning to walk away.
you were silent for a moment, blinking.
nico, who'd you'd forgotten had even been there, blew out a breath. "hell," he said, shaking his head, "that guy was a smoke."
"how many dates are you at?" you said, your eyeline still firmly on quinn, on the beautiful blonde girl he was dancing with. you stirred your halfway empty drink.
nico shrugged. "lost track," he said, "why? wanna borrow one?"
"maybe later," you said, then pushed yourself from the counter and began to make your way across the room.
the walk felt much longer than it was, as if a chasm had opened up between you and quinn, jagged rocks lining the walls, some treacherous river running through your legs, drenching your heels.
the walk felt longer than it was, but then you were in front of quinn, and the beautiful girl.
you tapped her on the shoulder, first. "could you move to the side for a second, babe?" you asked, completely apologetic. "don't wanna ruin your dress."
her features scrunched in confusion, but she stepped to the side, as you'd asked. you shot her a grateful look before turning to face quinn, meeting his eye.
you were almost shocked to find warmth, there, so unlike the stony coldness you'd expected from him.
still, you just gave him a facetious smile, short, snarky, before tossing the remnants of your drink at him.
it hit him square in the face, better aimed than you could have hoped. liquid dripped from the strong slope of his nose, down his jaw, soaking his white button down near the collar.
the blonde gasped, brought a hand to her mouth in shock.
you turned briefly to her. "'m sorry for the interruption," you said, genuinely. "you look gorgeous."
as quinn ran a slow hand down his face, wiping alcohol from his forehead, cheeks, you hummed and began to walk away, your stride satisfied as you made for the exit.
you dropped your glass on a table, walked through the doorway, onto the deck of the ship, the darkness of the night, sudden quiet a welcomed change of pace.
you had only just taken a breath when you felt a grip on your wrist, firm but not painful.
"just fuck off, won't you, quinn?" you said, just about done for the night. he just pulled you aside, boxed you against the railing on the deck, the noise of the sea in harmony with the faded beat of the club's mix.
you were so, so, done. you hadn't really wanted to come out, anyways, and then, when you were finally having a good time, he had to go and ruin it, send nico over to check in on you, like you needed some kind of babysitter.
he scoffed, a sound that felt beautiful in your ears, somehow. "think you can just walk away, after a stunt like that?" he said the words like they meant something deeper than just their surface meaning, but you couldn't, for the life of you, figure it out.
you blew out a breath, met his gaze directly.
you probably should have known by now that if there was one word to describe quinn, it was unfair.
unfair, how, drenched in a drink you tossed at him, he still looked this pretty. his hair damp, evident that he had run his hands through it. his features almost enhanced by the liquid that shone on them, his shirt practically sheer, now, drawing attention to his broad chest, corded shoulders. unfair.
maybe you had been wrong. maybe you couldn't handle this weekend. you'd been able to escape him before, for years, always had an easy out during gatherings with friends, always had something else to focus on.
he was everywhere here. he was unavoidable. he was inside your head, whispering in your ear. he was a phantom grapefruit taste on your tongue.
here, you were basically back in his bed, two years ago, back in that bar booth. here, you were surrounded by him.
"you sent nico to spy on me," you said, each word pronounced perfectly clear. you clenched your fists tight as if to restrain them. "how many times do i need to tell you, quinn? who i fuck is none of your business!"
he let out a noise that was half-growl. "you wanted him?" he asked, low and loaded, so painfully so it made your stomach drop.
"what does it matter?" you said. "i can't even speak to someone on this boat, apparently, without you breathing down my neck!"
"it matters," was his reply, spoken so softly, with a cutting bite. "it matters, doll."
you narrowed your eyes, searched his face for some clue. droplets of liquid still clung to his lashes, making his gaze impossibly beautiful.
"it shouldn't," you said, careful. "i'm desperate, remember?" your eyes widened in false despair. "don't you remember, quinn?"
his gaze dropped momentarily to your mouth, hung there just long enough for you to notice. "i remember," he said, so gently it shocked you. like he wasn't just talking about today.
the sea air suddenly felt hot, despite the windy chill. you were acutely aware of how close he was to you, his arms on either side of your waist, boxing you against the railing, his bent knee just barely grazing yours. the warmth of him like a radiator, the smell of him overwhelming.
"enough with the overprotective act," you demanded, willing any shake from your voice. "it has to stop, quinn, i can't do it."
"you can't do it?" he asked, calculated, incredulous. "you can't do it?"
you let out an exasperated huff. "what are you saying?" you pleaded. "jesus, fuck, quinn, all you do is stare and stare and stare and say nothing!"
"what am i supposed to say?" he said, gesturing vaguely around. "what could i ever say to you?"
"maybe try something true!" you said. "give that a shot!" your volume was much too loud, and there were probably people around, but you didn't really care, couldn't even register their presence. as always, with him, no one else seemed to matter, to even exist.
you could feel his chest rise and fall against yours for a moment, a pause so thick it almost felt suffocating. "it hurts to look at you," he said, finally.
and it would have been mean, would have been some cheap shot at calling you ugly, if his voice hadn't broken halfway through. if it hadn't seemed to be the hurt that was really the point.
his arms at your sides felt like something scandalous.
"and yet all you do is stare," you said, almost drowsily. "must be doin' a whole lot of hurting, over there."
something that felt like truth rose and fell between the two of you, light as the salty breeze, dark as the deep water below.
"does it hurt, now?" you breathed, your face so close to his as you peered up at him through your lashes.
his exhale felt like a million words, all jumbled up, offered up to you on a silver platter. he looked almost haggard. "so much, doll," he practically whined, and you wanted to taste his confession on your tongue, wanted to know what his honesty felt like on your lips. if it would feel the same as it did those years ago, if it would feel better.
you raised a careful, delicate hand to his damp face, brushed your fingertips along his hairline, slowly, almost mesmerized. he looked so beautiful, then, the faint light of the deck in contrast with the night making his face angelic in a terrible sort of way. "tell me you hate me," you said, little more than a whisper.
he gave an almost undetectable shake of his head, a rogue lock of hair curling into his face. "i can't," he said, soft, pulled into a trance by your ghost of a touch.
his full lips were so close to yours, and you angled your head slightly to made room for him, wanted all of him just so badly-
"no!" came a loud protesting voice that you immediately recognized as savannah. "do not throw her overboard!"
the two of you bolted apart from each other, a few feet between you, now. your pulse was still a pounding thud in your head, though, your body a sack of candy conversation hearts in all of its deliriousness.
you supposed it would look fairly suspicious, quinn so close to you, his hands so close to you, against the railing of the ship. maybe it did look like he was going to toss you over the edge. you could have laughed at how ridiculous the reality was.
savannah now stood in front of the two of you. you couldn't look at quinn, deathly afraid of what you would find if you did.
"what the hell was that, in there?" savannah demanded, gesturing wildly to where she had come from. she fixed her eyes on you. "since when are you a drink-thrower?"
you mumbled something like since a few minutes ago, i guess.
she huffed, turned to quinn. "and i hear you're sending nico on errands to do your dirty work for you?"
quinn looked at his feet, shifted his weight slightly. "wouldn't call it dirty work," he grumbled.
your best friend took a deep breath. "i understand that you guys don't really get along," she said, evenly.
quinn's gaze shot to you for a second, but you didn't return his attentive stare. you have no idea, you wanted to tell savannah.
"and i guess i should have known better than to trap you guys on a boat for a weekend, but you're adults! and the wedding is in less than a week," she continued, not angry but obviously frustrated. "i'm the one who's supposed to have a meltdown on wedding day, okay? not you two."
"sorry, sav," you said, and you felt bad, really.
she waved her hand. "it's my fault, too," she said, "just, i don't know, sleep this off and tomorrow you'll be able to get off this boat. think we're docking for a few hours, or something."
you sighed, snuck one last look at quinn like a last bite of a shared dessert. evidence of emotion just barely hid under his casual mask, evidence of being affected by you.
"i'll do better, okay?" you said, just to savannah, as you passed her, pulled her in for a quick hug in apology. "i promise."
she hugged you back. "i know it's not just you," she whispered into you ear. "and i trust you."
you nodded, squeezed her a last time before making the trek back up to your room. you passed jack, waiting just off to the side, keeping an eye on savannah, presumably.
"goodnight," you said to him, giving him a feeble wave.
he offered you a smile. "don't tell him i said this," he whispered, "that was one of the best things i've seen in my life."
you rolled your eyes at him as he bid you a returning goodnight.
you spotted lexi, sitting at a table just outside of the club entrance, your eyes widening when you recognized the blonde in her lap as the girl quinn had been dancing with. you smiled, slightly. they looked lost in conversation. they looked good together.
as you turned the corner to the stairwell, you almost jumped, then brought a hand to your heart, let out an alarmed exhale before recognizing nico, making out with a girl against the stair railing in an almost violent way.
you tried to squeeze past the two of them, eventually giving him a light shove. "move, nico," you whisper-yelled at him.
when you finally got past him and up the stairs, you were only a few steps from your door, finally closing yourself back into your room, exhaling a heavy breath, slipping off your heels.
you didn't quite make it to your bed, instead opting to fold a leg underneath you on the floor, lean back against the side of the mattress.
you weren't really sure why you suddenly felt that undeniable pressure on your waterline, that heat at the edges of your face that signaled coming tears.
the breeze through your window was a calming chill as you ran your palms up and down your thighs, trying to bring your breathing back to normal.
it felt like your heart was ten times its normal size, like it was so heavy it was sinking down into your stomach, like an anchor into the ocean waves.
your mind was a flurried rainstorm of quinn's hand on your wrist, his arms by your sides, his chest through his button down. his parted lips, so close to yours, his eyes, so unlike the fixed iciness you'd grown used to from him.
tell me you hate me, you'd asked him, practically begged him, your tone a sinful sort of plea.
i can't, he'd answered, like your request for the truth was some binding promise, like your pure want was some altar-laid sacrifice.
you went to sleep that night jittery, dreamed of slate eyes and stolen touches, glances that meant something stark.
of course, the next day, the last full day of the cruise, your energy had not dissipated. it left you just as uncertain and edgy as ever, because now, you wondered what quinn would do when he saw you.
more probable than not, you knew, he would do nothing. he would probably pretend like, just last night, he hadn't been about to kiss you, like he hadn't confessed to something monumental.
he would probably revert right back to staring, staring, staring, and nothing more. he might even revert back to hating you, for all you knew.
and then there was the part of you, a scary, maybe delusional part of you, that believed that maybe last night had changed something. that maybe he would do more than just look, that maybe you'd do more than just fight, that maybe this time would be different.
oh, how you wanted it to be different.
it had been you and quinn, first. how you wanted it to be you and quinn, now.
at the very least, you thought, as you got ready to leave, you'd have a way out, this time. you were finally getting off the boat, going to the beach for a few hours.
if he got to be too much, you could just walk away, this time, like you had grown used to in the past.
it was this positive outlook that you clung to as you made your way off of the boat, meeting up with luke on the stairs.
"and where were you last night?" you asked, after greeting him, raising a questioning brow.
he gave a playful eye roll. "no where as exciting as you," he said, teasing. "almost getting tossed overboard, and all."
you smacked him lightly on the back of the head. "i did not almost get thrown overboard," you clarified, "i was having a civilized discussion with your brother."
luke hummed. "were you?" he asked, "not quite what i heard."
"when did you become such a gossip, hm?" you pestered, stepping off onto the dock, exhaling with slight relief at the feeling of solid ground underneath your feet.
he shrugged. "people tell me stuff," he said, simply. he didn't have to clarify who people were.
you narrowed your eyes. "how much stuff?"
luke met your gaze, and there was an understanding there that scared you. "enough," he said.
you looked at your feet as you stepped onto the sand, found it warm, calming. "oh, great," you mumbled. you could only imagine what quinn must have said about you. how desperate and deluded you were, how you had gotten so attached to him after a single night, how you'd suddenly grown so malicious towards him as soon as he didn't return your feelings. your head hung, just a bit, because you hated to think that luke, someone you trusted and cared about so much, would think this of you, just from hearing it from quinn. "shocked that you even hang out with me, then, honestly."
you could feel luke's gaze on you like the sun. he cleared his throat, making you look up at him. "think, uh," he began, scratching the back of his neck in a nervous sort of habit. "think maybe you should just talk to him."
you laughed, spotting savannah and jack setting up an umbrella further down the beach. "because that's worked so well for us," you joked, but your heart jumped in your throat. because, oh, how easy it felt to refer to yourself and quinn as an us.
luke just shrugged. "it's worked better than the alternative," he said, putting his towel down before making to help jack with beach chairs.
his words stuck with you, suspended in your mind, for a moment, because he was right. you realized, however painfully, that you would prefer a screaming match with quinn by the pool to silent staring across the room at a gathering with your friends.
you'd take an excruciating argument with him over feigned, false civility any day of the week.
there you stood, your feet in the sand, looking out at the water, and you finally understood that you'd take all of the ugly, all of the hurt, all of the cold, if only it'd give you all of him.
"uh, you good?" sav said, giving you a confused look as she registered your quiet stillness.
you shook yourself from your mind, smiled at her. "all good," you said, and it was true.
lexi joined with the blonde from the night before in tow, whom she announced as erin.
you gave erin a guilty smile when you introduced yourself. "sorry again about last night," you said.
erin waved you off. "don't worry about it," she said, "that was the most dramatic night out i've had in forever."
she set up her towel next to you and lexi, and you quickly found how easy she was to talk to.
nico ambled his way down, at some point, eyes hidden behind massive sunglasses, a baseball cap on his head, a giant hoodie on despite the heat.
jack laughed when he got close enough. "the feds onto you, or something?" he said, referring to nico's ridiculous getup.
nico's pretty face contorted into a scowl. "i'm never drinking again," was his rough reply as he sat down on a towel, practically hissing at the bright light of the sun.
"yeah, right," you laughed. "you said that last time."
"fuck off," nico grumbled, hanging his head between his bent legs.
"oh, don't be mean, nico," savannah said, "it's not our fault you can't hold your tequila."
luke's face scrunched up is distaste. "you were drinking tequila last night?" he asked, "when did you join delta gamma?"
nico made to protest, but you didn't hear it, not really, because you were distracted.
your attention had strayed to where quinn now stood, right beside luke's chair. his approach had been silent, practically stealthy, but he was here, and he was looking at you.
the conversation around you seemed to fade away, to dip down deep below the gentle waves that lapped at the shoreline.
it was still a shock to your system every time you saw him, even though you'd known each other for so long. maybe it was an even greater shock, now, because you weren't quite used to seeing so much of him, of getting so much of him, on back to back to back days.
after being practically starved of him, or at least of his true emotions, this weekend had felt like being drowned in him, held under the water by your throat until your vision swam and your chest was on the edge of exploding.
it didn't help that the way he looked, now, in broad daylight, was so brutally stunning that it stole your breath.
he looked almost weary, the shadows of his face defined and sharp, his jaw rough with stubble. maybe he'd tossed and turned all night, as you had? maybe he'd dreamed of you, too?
your languished gaze caught slowly on his bare arms, returned reluctantly back to his face. he appeared to be just barely on the cusp of, well, something, spurred on by your obvious attention, something alight in his eyes that made your stomach flip.
you felt your cheeks grow hot, bit your lip, slightly. when he was looking at you, like this, you could all but hear his firm rasp in your ear, feel his callused hand tug at your hair.
you looked away, down at your hands, afraid that your eyes were giving too much away, afraid that he could somehow tell exactly what you were thinking, exactly what memories his presence was bringing to mind.
everything felt overheated, and not just because of the sun.
time passed at an agonizing pace. hours during which you could sense when he was looking at you, could feel his stare like a bullet to the heart. during which you would occasionally look back, meet his heated, cryptic eyes, silently beg him to do something, to do anything.
but, for hours, he didn't, and you grew angrier, more fiery with every passing second.
of course he would do nothing, you tried to rationalize, this was quinn you were talking about. this was quinn, in front of all of his friends, so of course he would pretend like you were barely there.
the hurt of it all made you feel almost seasick, woozy and disbelieving, mentally grasping wildly for something to grab on to.
the hurt of him made you seasick, the whole of him made you lovesick, but what did it matter, you thought. at what point were you not just dizzy over him?
"i'm going for a walk," you said, abruptly, getting up and mumbling some affirmation when sav reminded you the boat was leaving soon, so you should hurry back.
the sand shifting under your feet, the pleasant chill of the water at your ankles, you wanted it to calm you down, you wanted your escape plan to calm you down, like it had so many times in the past.
that's what you'd said all weekend, wasn't it? that it had been so hard to be around quinn without a clear way out?
you wanted to scream, felt heat prick behind your eyes, because here you were, walking away, and it didn't feel any easier. you didn't feel any relief, any satisfaction.
he was back there, and you were here, and it didn't look like last night had changed anything, for him. it didn't look like you were as life-altering a person as he was, for you.
the thought made slow, hot tears finally, finally break through. you blinked hard as you continued to walk, the pressure in your head painful, scorching droplets hanging onto your throat before falling to the sand below.
you had no idea how long you had been walking, how long you'd been crying, but eventually, you looked up, and realized it was actually getting darker. the sun was much lower in the sky, the wind a bit quicker. clouds had began to creep in, making it grey and ominous.
great, you thought, rain on your impossibly long walk back was exactly what you needed.
you stilled, looked down at your feet, let out a deep, heavy breath, watched the water twist and pool around your ankles. maybe you could just stay like this forever. maybe your body would eventually decompose into the damp sand and smooth pebbles, turn into something beautiful.
"jesus, doll, there you are."
your head whipped back as you turned around, found a slightly out of breath quinn now in front of you. you blinked at him, your lips shut. was this some trick of the storm? what was he doing here? how dare he follow you?
your eyes didn't leave his, as you watched his gaze visibly soften so beautifully when he took in your face.
it must have been bad, you thought, evidence of crying for however long all over you. your cheeks must have been splotchy, your lashes clumped together, your lips puffy, eyes red.
this vision of you seemed to sober him, to make his heightened breathing cool down to something more composed.
he exhaled, braved a step closer to you, now only a foot apart. his gaze dripped down you in a way that had you wanting to just sink into the earth. "doll," he began, almost a warning, "you been crying?"
you didn't say anything, for a second, didn't indulge his obvious question with a response.
"what are you doing here?" you said, eventually, but it came out like a statement, a whisper, as you messily wiped your face with the back of your hand.
he had the gall to blink back at you, as if confused, that sorry softness still drenching his face, his posture. "you'd been gone for a while," he began, "the boat was leaving, and i just-"
"do you just want to fight, again?" you asked, your blood growing hotter with each second he was here, so close to you. you hated how wobbly your voice sounded, how resigned you already seemed to be. you peered up at him, felt your heart crack in two. "do you know your lines, yet, quinn?"
"i don't want to fight," he said, and conflict burned bright across his gaze, indecision.
"should i start or you?" you pressed, ignoring his admission, "how many times do i have to make a fool of myself before i finally stop expecting you to act like i matter?"
his breath was sharp in silence. the wind whipped your hair around your face, sticking to your tear-stained cheeks.
"of course you matter," he said, almost incredulous, like the whole idea of thinking otherwise was ridiculous.
your laugh was bitter, mean. "oh, of course," you bit out. "of course, right? how could i not be able to tell? you say you don't hate me, but you won't even talk to me in front of our friends," you swung you arms about in gesture. "jesus fuck, quinn, you almost kissed me, last night, and today it's right back to whatever bullshit we've been pulling for the last two years." you looked away from him, so overwhelmed with emotion. "it wasn't me who ruined this whole thing."
"you think i ruined it?" something equally terrifying and lovely melted across his eyes.
you scoffed. "it wasn't me who pretended like we'd never met," you snarked. you could almost sense a well of feeling rumbling through him like a cresting wave.
"you left!" he finally rasped, the most emotion you'd seen from him, maybe ever, his voice echoing in your head as the wind continued its assault, as small raindrops began to fall. "you left, doll, okay? i thought that night was special, but i woke up alone," he said, and it was so gravelly, sad, you felt it in your teeth.
you blinked, watched his chest rise and fall in heaving breaths. how could that be true? it dawned on you that you barely remembered much of what you did that morning, having focused so intently, for so long, on him. was it possible this whole thing was a misunderstanding?
"so you pretend not to know me?" you pressed, rain cold on your legs, your face, an icy contrast to the hot tears that had stopped flowing.
he gave a resigned gesture, blew out a breath. "i was embarrassed!" he said, "i am embarrassed, okay, doll? it's fucking embarrassing to be so into someone and then have them leave without saying goodbye, alright?"
your split heart thumped despite its brittle ache. there was a pause as you both registered just what the other had just admitted to.
both of you were soaked, now, rain dripping down your faces, but you didn't feel cold. you felt as if every inch of your skin was on fire, like your heart was trying to claw its way out of your chest.
you didn't know what to say. he had laid all his cards on the table, right in front of you, given you the honesty you'd been begging him for.
"and, you know, you wanted to kiss me, too, last night," quinn said, finally, defensive, hot, a thermometer approaching the highest temperature. as if the fact made it easier on him, somehow, as if it was a thread tying him to the earth, keeping him from floating away. "it wasn't just me."
you groaned through clenched teeth, a guttural sound. "of course i did! of course i want to kiss you!" you almost yelled, laying a tight fist on his solid chest, just barely holding back from slamming it into him.
his eyes were a forest fire, then, as your choice of words registered, a pause heavier than rock between you.
"wanted or want, doll?" he asked, and it was a breath, a whine, a plea as he allowed himself to wrap a heavy arm around your waist, pull you closer to him, until you could feel the warmth of his breath on your face. the closest he'd been, dizzyingly close, like a dream.
you realized your mistake even in your dazed state, how he'd said you'd wanted to kiss him the night before. how you said you want to.
you could have easily laughed him off, said it was a tenses slip-up. you unfurled your fist, instead, laid your palm flat against his chest, perhaps imagined his heart beating in your grip.
he had been so honest with you, after all, had finally told you the truth. the least you could do was return the favor.
"want," you all but whispered, gazing up at him through raindrops and vulnerability.
what was and what could be melted away in a single moment.
he was a blur of relief and desperate motion. "thank fuck," was his murmured groan as he took the side of your face in a rough hand and guided your lips to his in a kiss that felt like a feat of nature one million times more impressive than the storm that blew around you.
it had been years of countless petty fights and cruel misunderstandings, of bitter jealousy and longing gazes, of deifying the last time you'd had quinn, like this. and yet, still, it was so much better than you remembered. he was.
the way he clutched at your hip like he couldn't bear to let you go, not anymore, not this time. the way his hand on your face was so firm, but so gentle. that undeniable faint grapefruit taste, so completely him.
how you melted into his chest, wrapped your arms around his neck, just wanting him closer, closer, just wanting him so close that you'd never be apart again.
you whimpered against his mouth when his teeth pulled lightly at your bottom lip, like some punishment for all you'd put him though. you just rooted your hand in his hair, now soaking wet, tugged at the curls near his neck, in your own kind of retaliation, until he gave a choked moan of his own.
that's for what you did to me, the soft sensation of pain screamed at both of you.
but his chapped lips moved with such intention against yours, like he wanted to swallow down all of the tears you'd cried over him. your body against his felt so right, so warm and comfortable even in the wet and cold weather.
but this is for what you are to me, was the ultimate response, communicated wordlessly through your kiss, through his.
at some point, you both pulled away, only just slightly, your forehead leaning against his as you both caught your breath, so elevated. his stony eyes were so molten, so clear and telling, as he traced his thumb down your jaw, finally wrapped both arms around your back and clasped his hands.
the silence was so beautiful, for a while.
"did the boat really leave?" you asked, dazed, finally, your voice low, husky.
quinn just nodded. "jack said they'll reimburse us for the night if we stay at the inn downtown," he explained, looking around to locate the road, the civilization that existed outside of your perfect bubble. his eyes found you again, something like mirth hidden in there, somewhere. "probably should get out of the rain."
your swollen mouth quirked up in a half-smile as you nodded your agreement, let him hold your hand in his as you made the short walk to the inn jack had been referring to.
you checked in together, ignoring a slightly confused look from the person at the desk, probably at the fault of your rain-drenched appearances. quinn made to grab some overnight necessities at the supermarket next door, kindly letting you take a warm shower while he did so.
when you opened the door to your room, you quickly realized that there was only one bed to share between the two of you. your stomach rolled at the thought, at the pressure that would exist, or not exist, when he returned. at the question of how far you were going to take this. your heart hurt at just how far you'd take it, take him, if he'd let you.
the thought vibrated through you as you let the warm water wash away the day's wear from your skin, eventually wrapping yourself up in a towel.
you hadn't realized how late it was, the quick storm messing with your conception of passing time. it was almost nine by the time quinn got back.
he closed the door behind himself, and the clicking noise that followed felt like something serious as he turned to face you, set the bag of things he had gotten on the dresser.
he cleared his throat as his gaze caught haphazardly on your bare shoulders, the slope of your neck, then finally registering the bed that you were sitting on, the singularity of it. he flushed down to his collar, making butterflies flutter to life in your chest.
he eventually averted his gaze enough to maintain a glimpse of dignity, opening the bathroom door. "got some stuff for you in there, doll," he called, gently, over his shoulder before he shut the door behind him, seemingly to take a shower himself.
you tried not to blush, because you were too old for that, too mature. you exhaled, tried to convince yourself that you would be fine no matter what happened, tonight. you'd kissed, sure, and there seemed to be an air of lightness, of understanding between you, but that didn't necessarily mean you were entirely past all of your issues. that didn't mean quinn wanted to move as fast as you did.
you distracted yourself by going through the bag on the dresser, trying to put together some semblance of your nighttime routine. the clothing options, understandably, must not have been plentiful. you smiled, laughed lightly as you pulled out the tshirt he'd gotten for you to change into, which was one of those touristy ones that read the person who bought me this shirt loves me very much!
and it was obviously because there had been no other options, but a piece of you clung to the sentiment, dug your nails into the flesh of it so hard it began to bleed.
regardless, you got ready to go to sleep, pretended to ignore when you heard the shower head turn off, the bathroom door eventually open, averted your gaze and forced away your blush upon quinn's reappearance.
the air of the room felt almost metallic, tangible, like it was rattling around the space instead of flowing.
you knew it was partially due to the way he looked, now, damp and flushed from the warm water, his chest bare and broad, a towel slung low on his hips. you swallowed, looked up at the ceiling, as if there was something very interesting up there. as if there was anything more captivating to you than him.
he pulled on the cheap clothes he'd gotten for himself, went through the motions of his own little routine, all while you pretended to be on your phone, scrolling through apps but not retaining even a bit of information.
"good if i turn the light out?" he eventually asked, soft, to which you nodded, consenting to the darkness that followed, the rustling of comforters and sheets as he joined you on the bed.
you set your phone down, tried to close your eyes, but you couldn't relax, not with him just so, so close, not with so much that you still wanted to do. not with years of complete lack weighing on you, not with the memory of his lips on yours so beautifully fresh in your mind.
you were turned away from him, a bit of space between you, but you could somehow feel that he was awake, too, that he was just as aware of the energy and expectation that coated the two of you like a watery film.
the texture of the inn's cheap sheets felt grating and terrible against your hot skin, made you restless, rubbing your legs together against the other slowly, fussing with your pillow, tediously careful to not make contact with him.
"doll," was quinn's inevitable comment, more of a warning, a statement, spoken low and rough, rumbling through you.
you didn't turn to face him, but stilled. "sorry," you mumbled, your cheeks warm.
"what's wrong?" you could basically feel the words on your back, the heat from his breath, his body.
you exhaled, still refusing to face him head-on, knew you'd be done for if you did. "nothing's wrong," you whispered.
he hummed, almost like this was amusing to him. "can feel you thinkin' from here," he said, soft. "tell me."
the pause before you spoke was solid, weighted. "just don't want to go back what we were before," you said, and it was the tone of a beggar, so honest in want. "just want this time to be different."
then he reached his arms out, wrapped them around your middle, pulled you back against his soft frame. you swore you must have exhaled a thousand anxieties as you melted into him, shifted your hips back against him.
"i want that, too," he admitted, and you could barely stop your smile as you finally turned to face him, undeniably beautiful even in the darkness.
"really?" you asked, not caring for a second how pathetic it sounded, how glutted with hope, almost childlike.
you felt his nod more than saw it as his grip around you tightened, his hands firmly grasping the flesh of your hips as you reached up, traced your fingers along the edge of his jaw.
"i'm sorry i left," you breathed, and you could feel his chest contract at your apology. "i never wanted to hurt you."
"i'm sorry, too," he said, "'m sorry i acted like you didn't matter to me, doll." his tone dripped with meaning. "'m sorry i lied."
your mouth quirked. "done a lot of lying, haven't we?" you mused. it was honestly impressive, how long you'd both kept up the charade.
he mumbled some affirmation that you felt against your forehead, the heat of it making you rub your calves together, again. "still nervous?" he asked.
you peered up at him. "not nervous," you clarified, "i just-"
you exhaled, lowered your gaze, almost stumbled over your words, because how could you tell him exactly what you thought?
how could you say all i've wanted for years is for you to touch me like you did that night?
somehow, maybe because he was feeling something similar, he seemed to know exactly where your head was, exactly the dilemma that existed in your mind.
"ask me," he said, hard, firm, "ask me, doll. know i like you desperate."
you whimpered, because his words could have been a taunt, had been a taunt before, but not this time.
because you were desperate, only for him. and he wanted you anyways.
"i need you, quinn," you whined, gathering his shirt in a clenched fist, "fuck, i need you so bad."
that was enough, though you supposed the truth had always been enough, for the two of you.
it was enough for his lips to crash against yours for the second time, that night, this time so soft, no longer fueled by anger or revenge but by something lovelier, slow burning, something you felt in your feet.
your lips parted almost immediately in a soft moan, making space for him as his hand braced the back of your neck, holding you tight as he shifted you so that he was on top of you, the weight and solidity of him almost oppressive, if not exactly what you'd been craving for so long.
he kissed you hard, adoring, like he wanted the outline of your mouth imprinted on his forever, as his other hand traced down the side of your body, eventually stilling to push your searching hips into the mattress.
"be good, doll," he murmured against your jaw, leaving messy kisses down your neck that had your throat feeling tight.
"can't," you whined, grasping for the curls at the nape of his neck, lifting your hips again to try to get some kind of friction against his lap. "can't, baby, been waiting so long." you tugged at his hair as his hand rested heavily on your inner thigh. "been wantin' you forever."
he let out a groan, finally moved his broad hand to tug your clothes aside, run his fingers through your folds. "yeah?" you could feel him smile against your neck as your breathing picked up, as he just barely grazed your clit, making you squirm. "been thinkin' 'bout me?" he asked. "'bout the last time i fucked you?"
you whimpered, nodded feverishly, because you had been thinking about it. a day rarely went by that you didn't think about it. it felt like something mythical that it didn't have to be just a memory anymore, that he didn't have to be your haunted house. that he could be here, with you, like this.
he pushed a thick finger into you, urging a strained sound from your throat. "'s okay," he cooed, watching you adjust to the pressure, the sensation.
he began a steady pace, adding another finger, making the slick sound of you seem to echo off the thin walls of the inn, making you wonder briefly if there was someone staying in the room next door. such a concern was quickly overwhelmed, though, as you got used to the stretch of his fingers, began to hunger for something else.
"know 've been dreamin' 'bout you, don't you?" he asked, moving his fingers faster, "fuck, got me all worked up, all those times, doll." his smirk grew arrogant. "so mean of you."
you clutched at his tense forearm. "''m sorry, quinn," you begged, rough and wild, "please, baby, please fuck me."
he slowed his pace, let you paw at his clothes before helping move them out of the way. "ask so pretty for me," he praised, spitting into his hand, pumping himself up and down, so hard and hot against you as he lined himself up, his voice dipping down even lower, somehow, like he was speaking only to himself, as if in a dream. "been dyin' to fuck you."
you whined when he began to push into you, the stretch dizzying, making your vision swim, your chest tighten. you grabbed a fistful of a sheet with one hand, the other arm grasping for him, eventually looping around his neck, your nails digging into the tense muscles of his shoulders.
his exhale was a shudder, one you felt so deeply, so intimately, one that told you that he was feeling a similar way to you - like you were being pulled between memory and reality, what was and what would be.
the pressure felt impossible as he bottomed out, let you adjust to him. "you're, fuck," you bit out, squeezing your eyes shut, "'re bigger than i remember."
someone else probably would have smirked, said something self-satisfying, but he didn't, seemingly too lost in the feeling of you around him, of having you, like this. "open your eyes, doll," he said, strained.
you gave a slight shake of your head in protest, knowing exactly what your refusal would do to him, knowing exactly the roughness it would bring out as he began to fuck into you, slow and deep, so overwhelming and perfect you could have cried.
"don't be a brat," he ordered.
a greedy smile fell across your lips when you felt his warm palm on your throat, his hand squeezing just barely, just enough feel him, everywhere. you opened your eyes, met his dark gaze, felt yourself clench down so tightly around him.
his rhythm grew brutal. "still like that, do you, doll?" he groaned, to which you whined at the insinuation that he remembered every detail of that night the way you did. that he had remembered what you liked and didn't like so vividly, even now.
"more, baby," you pleaded, feeling your head grow fuzzy with pleasure, that pressure inside of you so extreme, heat bursting through your waterline like you were about to cry. "fuck, quinn, need you harder."
"yeah?" he rasped, releasing your neck and bringing his hands down to tease your clit, making your back arch up off of the mattress, your hips jolting. "'f you needed a good fuck, doll, should've just asked."
you whimpered at his words, so cruel, but they pushed you impossibly closer, regardless, as he placed a wide palm on your lower stomach, intensifying the sensation. "i needed it," you babbled, feeling the wet feeling of hot tears on your cheeks but not really registering anything besides him, "needed your cock, baby."
he groaned, looked up for a second as if praying. maybe he was. maybe this was something worth praying for. "can feel you close, doll," he said, his thrusts growing wild, his face flushed with exertion, "give me it, hm?"
"'m gonna cum," you breathed, not recognizing your husk of a voice as you rooted your hand in his hair.
"cum on my cock," he said, a plea, "fuck, doll, been so perfect for me, waited so good."
you came apart at his words, your vision growing dimmer even in darkness, your thighs tensing as you felt your high trigger his own orgasm, warm and wet, his rough groan louder than even the storm-heightening waves outside, somehow more powerful.
his heavy body collapsed atop yours, both of you damp with sweat, your hair sticking to your tear-stained face, his soft curls to the back of his neck. you could feel every exhale against your chest, every twitch of his muscles in your bones.
at some point, he rolled off of you, pulled you against him, so, so tight, like letting you go would be something unforgivable. his arms around you felt like a million apologies, like something solid underneath you, finally, after being seasick and dizzy for so, so long.
he traced a drowsy thumb under your eyes, collecting the remnants of tears you'd barely noticed you'd shed.
"that good, eh?" he rasped, and you could hear his smile.
you rolled your eyes, couldn't stop your own grin as you playfully slapped him on the chest, relished in his low laugh against your hand, into your hair. "hey, can i ask you something?" you said, propping yourself up on your elbow.
"'course," he said, and that alone felt like something too lovely to be true.
"will you be my date to the wedding?" you asked, and your smile grew wider at his obvious conflict of interest. "even though it means you'll lose our bet?"
he groaned, rubbed a hand over his face. "fine," he said, his eyes flashing in the dark, "but only 'cause you look so pretty like this."
you gave a light noise of excitement in celebration, leaned forward to press a kiss to his cheek. "and for my prize i choose," you said, trailing off, thinking, tapping a finger to your mouth in contemplation before pointing it at quinn. "you."
his gentle smile was something surreal as he pulled you even closer to him, your cheek against his chest. "done," he breathed, and when he pressed his lips to the top of your head, it was something right.
when you finally reconvened with your friends the next day at the port, savannah approached you first, pulling you in for a hug.
"i'm so sorry," she said, "i wanted to stay and wait for you, but quinn said he was going to go by himself, and then luke said i shouldn't-"
"it's okay," you said, "it all worked out. we're here now, safe and sound."
savannah's brow quirked. "you seem awfully chipper," she observed, taking a step back as if to get the full picture.
you smiled at her, and you could feel quinn smile too, next to you, your stomach flipping when he looped a hand around your waist and pulled you to him, his grip strong and sure.
sav's eyes went wide, lexi laughed. nico whispered something to jack, luke gave an exaggerated fist pump.
"well," savannah said, "took you long enough, jesus."
"wait," you said, slowly, "you knew?"
she waved you off. "of course i knew, i'm your best friend."
you gestured around to the group. "who else knew?"
lexi raised her hand as if in a classroom. you nodded, invited her to speak up. "like knew that you guys fucked a couple years ago?" she clarified, "or knew that you guys secretly were super obsessed with each other?"
"because the answer to both of those questions is yes," nico piped up from the back.
quinn was silent, his low laugh against your neck as he clasped his arms around your front, pulled you back against him.
you turned your neck to look up at him. "did you tell them?" you asked.
"i told someone who probably told them," he mused.
you fixed your gaze on luke. "you absolute drama queen," you scolded, though you were smiling.
luke put his hands up in the air in surrender. "not my fault," he said, "we would have figured it out, anyways. not like you two were doing a good job of hiding anything."
"he's got a point," quinn whispered just behind your ear.
you sighed. "fine," you conceded. "i forgive you. and i forgive all of you for abandoning me in some random seaside town."
nico huffed. "yeah, really slummin' it, eh?" he asked, "you were at a bed and breakfast for a night with your pretty-much boyfriend. relax."
quinn pinched your hip, which made you smile. "so, where are we dropping nico off?" you asked, "might i suggest a deserted island?"
"finally gets the guy she wants and suddenly she's got jokes," nico muttered.
you felt quinn smile against your neck, and you smiled, too.
the wedding, the next weekend, was exactly the beautiful occasion you knew it would be, with only the most predictable of issues and the most simple of solutions.
you walked down the aisle with quinn, whose touch on your waist lingered right before you split apart to stand on opposite sides of the altar. when you both stilled, you shared a soft smile that felt like home.
lexi walked next, arm and arm with nico. erin was somewhere in the pews, as her and lex had really hit it off, and you were pretty sure about four girls here were under the impression that they were nico's one and only date.
luke walked by himself, a ring-bearer and flower-girl, of sorts, his tie a little too loose, his suit jacket too wide in the shoulders. his friend-date, mackie, you remembered, gave an emphatic cheer when luke tripped over the carpeted aisle, stumbling on his feet.
finally, sav walked down, looking just so beautiful, alight and glowing with the sort of beauty that comes with being a kind person surrounded by those you love.
it was a beautiful ceremony.
the reception was distinct in its energy, heightened by an open bar and big dance floor.
you danced with your best friends, smiled as you watched jack and sav enjoy dances together, laughed as nico tried to juggle his several dates.
"might not have been the best idea, eh?" you asked him, once, when he passed you and luke on the dance floor.
he made a pft sound, waved you off. "i can handle it," he said, his eyes suddenly filling with alarm, "but if you see the redhead, warn me."
you danced goofily with luke for a bit, giggling at his awkward moves, mimicking them in an exaggerated way.
when the songs grew slower, lazily, you felt a hand on the small of your back that you'd know anywhere, that you'd known even in absence.
"mind if i cut in, lukey?" he asked, and you rolled your eyes at his funny wording, but luke complied with a smile, and then it was the two of you, quinn's hands around your waist, yours looped around his neck, your fingers playing softly with his hair.
"you look really pretty, tonight," you said to him, unable to hide your smile, and it was true. his unruly hair, sharp features, full lips, it was distracting. that, combined with his pressed pants and the fact that a few buttons had come undone from his shirt over the course of the night. "everyone's jealous of me, i bet."
you'd tell him a thousand times to see the way his gaze softened, the way a faint pink blush bloomed across the bridge of his nose. "thank you, doll," he said, genuineness evident in his voice, soft. "'re too good to me, yeah?"
you laughed, at this, felt it light up your face. "makin' up for lost time," you teased.
he pulled you so close to him, then, until his embrace was basically a swaying hug, a tired excuse for a dance. "got all the time in the world," he said, low, only for you, against your temple, and it felt like rebuilding a world from devastation. it felt like beginning, like living. it felt like him.
it had been you and quinn, first. it had been you and quinn, the coward and the fool, in the middle, however violently.
and, finally, it was you and quinn, now. now, and forever.
fin.
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taehyuncult · 4 months
Text
leehan + fingering
a/n: his hands are pretty. that’s it. that’s all i have to say.
warnings: inexperienced!reader, fem!reader, leehan is slightly inexperienced, fingering ofc, making out/bit of spit, dirty talk, bit of a praise kink, some insecurity/worrying, use of the names baby, pretty girl, my girl, and princess (again i went overboard… this is kinda graphic & way too long)
SMUT UNDER THE CUT. MDNI.
when you first started dating, you told leehan upfront that you hadn’t really explored your sexuality. when you brought up intimacy with him, he also shared that he didn’t have ton of experience either, making your heart calm down a bit. him being him, he was so kind and understanding. he never pressured you, never made you feel like you had to have sex at any point. he was willing to wait for your comfort, telling you that he doesn’t mind at all to be patient and that the ball is in your court. he wanted you to initiate things, so that he knew it was what you really wanted. that whole conversation was basically just him showing off how much of a green flag man he is, and again, you felt that same sense of relief.
to this day, you still haven’t really done anything with him besides making out. you wanted him, of course you did. your heart yearned for him, you wanted to make him feel good. you wanted to see what he looks like when he’s overcome with pleasure. you wanted to hear the sounds he makes caused by your body, your hands, your mouth. your nerves just got in the way of things, until today.
you were riled up all day, not knowing how to handle yourself. you kept thinking about what it would feel like to finally have leehan inside you; the sounds, the sensations, the love that would be shared. you two spent the day together and it seemed like everything he did somehow turned you on. you especially felt like his hands were making you go crazy. your boyfriend had the prettiest hands ever. you wondered what it would feel like to have them inside you, sliding in and out while he watches you, hopefully praising you. god, you knew it would feel so good to get praised by him. have him tell you how pretty you look when you fall apart-
“baby, are you doing okay? you seem like you’ve been out of it?” he asked you as you two sat on the couch together. you completely zoned out while thinking about him. “yeah- i’m fine, just a little bit stressed i think?” you responded, to which he pouted slightly while thinking for a moment. his eyes lit up as if something clicked and he looked at you with a sweet smile before saying, “how about we go on a night drive? we can talk and you can tell me everything that’s on your mind?” you nodded in agreement, but were freaking out on the inside. the thought of being in such a closed space with him made your heart rate go up.
you drove around a bit, before finding a nice parking lot that was pretty much empty. you put the car in park, while keeping it on so you could have some chill music softly playing in the background. you sat there in silence for a moment, before he broke it by asking “wanna get in the back?” you nodded as you both climbed in the back, but you made sure you were sitting as far from him as possible.
“what’s wrong? did i do something?” he asked you as he noticed immediately the distance you put between the two of you. he never misses anything. “no! i promise it’s not you- i’m just stressed.” he looked at you for a bit, noticing how you refused to make eye contact with him, before asking “but why are you so stressed?” you took a big deep breath in, feeling as though you should just be honest about the fact that your body craved him. fuck it, might as well spit it out before he starts to worry that he did something wrong.
“it’s just embarrassing- but… i haven’t been able to stop thinking about you all day.” you admitted as your cheeks started heating up. he smiled at you, “but i’m right here? why would you be thinking about me?” he asked in sincerity. you couldn’t believe he didn’t get the hint at first, maybe he just thought you were so innocent that sex wasn’t really on your mind or something. you sighed in defeat, “leehan, i can’t stop thinking about your hands. i’m curious, i guess? i mean if it’s okay-“ he interrupted you, knowing you were about to go on a tangent, ��what? that’s not embarrassing at all. it’s natural to want your lover.” he said in a gentle, but deep voice. god, even his voice was enough to make your pussy leak. “can we… maybe do something?” you asked as you hid behind your hands, feeling your face get even warmer. he scooted over to get closer to you. he moved your hands away so he could see you, and he had a soft smile on his lips as he asked “yes. are you sure, though?” you nodded enthusiastically, feeling like your body was on fire with how much you needed him.
“just relax for me, pretty girl.” he whispered as he got even closer to you, kissing your forehead, closing the space between you two. his soft, full lips melted into yours as he kissed you with such passionate. just the feeling of his lips on yours was enough to have your head spinning and your insides doing somersaults. his tongue made its way into your mouth, playing with your own. his hand pushed back a few strands of your hair behind your ear, then started caressing your cheek. you broke the kiss, both of you out of breath, before you whispered “more” to him. you attacked his own lips with yours; this kiss was much messier and full of desperation. you wrapped your arms around his body, pulling him close to you. he broke the kiss, a bit of saliva still connecting the two of you. “gonna take such good care of you.” he said as he gave you another soft kiss then started kissing your neck, nipping at your soft skin, making you moan out. “leehan, please, i need you” you whined as you felt like if he didn’t touch you, you might combust.
“so needy. what am i gonna do with you?” he laughed lightly as he pulled back to look at you. “you’re so beautiful… can i take care of you?” he asked as he gestured to your bottoms. you quickly nodded your head and even started to take off your bottoms for him, making him chuckle at how eager you were. he gently moved your hands, wanting to do it for you, and he took them off so you were only in your panties. he took a deep breath in as he was able to see the big wet patch. “so wet already, you must have been aching for me, huh?” he questioned, and once again you nodded with a “mhmm” as a response. he brought his hand to your clothed cunt, his index finger just barely traced the wet spot, making you flinch. he barely touched you and your body was already so sensitive. the way you flinched made your body start to heat up, getting embarrassed at how needy you must seem. “s-sorry about that…” you apologized with your head down. he immediately picked your chin up, so you were looking directly at him. “you’re okay, princess, gonna make you feel so good.” he said as he looked at you with a sudden look of concentration. “can i take your panties off?” he asked as he started circling the large wet spot again, and smirked as you immediately let out a breathless “yes.”
he practically ripped your panties off your body, staring at your now fully exposed pussy. he went in for another kiss, then asked “can i touch you?” “i think i’ll die if you don’t” you admitted to him, causing him to laugh. he took his index and middle fingers into his mouth, making sure to coat them well before taking them out. you felt yourself clench around nothing as you watched him do probably the hottest thing you have ever seen someone do, and he must have noticed as he asked you “like what you see?” he raised his eyebrow. you were going to answer before he took his two fingers, gliding them between your folds.
you were so sensitive, you let out a moan as this sensation was completely new to you. just the feeling of his fingers sliding between your soaking folds felt like electricity was coursing through your body. he focused on only using his middle finger, swirling it along your clit. you felt butterflies in your stomach and felt a fire in your tummy as you whined for him to just enter you already. he smirked, making his way down to your entrance, slowly pushing into the opening. he took his time, not pumping his fingers just yet, he wanted you to really feel it. he wanted you to be comfortable. shortly after, he slowly started moving in and out.
you whimpered at the feeling as this was something you had never experienced before, you didn’t want to be too much so you were trying so hard to contain yourself. “you’re so pretty like this, trying so hard to keep it together. i can tell, you know?” he said as he continued easing his middle finger in and out of your soaking cunt. “f-feels good, but is embarrassing” you said, which just motivated him to start going faster. “it’s not, i want you to let go and give me everything.” he said as he started curling his finger up, gently hitting that one extra sensitive spot in your body. you threw your head back, the feeling becoming too much, and gave into his wishes. “f-fuck leehan.” you moaned out. “that’s it, let me hear those pretty moans.” he encouraged you as he kept fucking you with his finger. “want me to add another?” he asked as he thought he could make you feel even better. “mhmm,” you whimpered out as he added a second finger. his pace slowed, making sure you experienced not a single ounce of discomfort, until you grabbed onto his wrist. “don’t- um… don’t go slow…” you told him, getting a look of surprise from him in response, which quickly turned into a grin.
he started picking up the pace, sliding his fingers in and out quickly, but not too quickly. you couldn’t hold back your moans, it was all too much. a wet sound started to fill the entire car and you covered your face with your hands again out of embarrassment. “what’s wrong?” he asked and you just whined out, “sounds so embarrassing.” “i promise, it’s not, here, feel.” he assured you by taking one of your hands and putting it on his hard cock. “it’s making me so hard, seeing my girl like this.” he said as he continued focusing on you, you softly squeezed his cock in his pants, causing him to pause for a split second. he took a sharp breath in and went back to you, this caused you to become curious. you started pawing at his pants, noticing a similar wet spot like the one you had just moments ago. he curled his fingers upwards, hitting that spot again to distract you from his cock. he wanted you to cum before all else and he was more than determined to make that happen.
you clawed at his bicep, clinging onto it as you fell victim to his hand. you felt a weird tingling sensation in your belly, you’ve felt it before when you touch yourself. however, it felt different this time, as if it were 10x more intense. “l-leehan-fuck!” you cried out as his thumb started rubbing at your clit. “close? is my pretty girl going to cum for me?” he said as he continued fucking you with his fingers. “yes! gonna cum so hard for you.” you told him, not even phased anymore as those words left your mouth. “yeah, princess? is your cute little pussy gonna gush for me?” you felt that same electric feeling like your nerves were slowly being set alight one by one. “yes! yes! just keep going, please” you rambled on as you were right there on the edge. he came close to your ear, whispering to you in that heavenly deep voice of his, “i’m so proud of you, my good girl.” that was it, that statement alone caused you to fall apart immediately. your orgasm hitting you so hard you could barely breath. you cried out his name, your back arching as he rode you through the euphoria.
“that’s it, feels good right?” he smiled at you as he watched you come down from the most intense high you’ve ever experienced. you could only nod at him, feeling your eyes become heavy. he slowly took his fingers out, making sure to lick up all your essence with not a drop left behind. the sight caused a shiver to run up your spine. he grabbed your discarded clothes, dressing you with care. “you feel okay?” he said as he kissed your forehead. “do i feel okay? i feel like so good i can’t think right now, that was insane.” you admitted and he went in to kiss you. his lips against yours were much softer as if he was trying to tell you just how much he loved you through it.
once your brain cleared up, you realized he was probably still hard. “can i touch you?” you asked with a pout. “don’t worry about it tonight, baby, we have all the time in the world for that.” he said as he grabbed you in for a hug. “i love you. thank you for letting me make you feel good and trusting me.” he said as he wrapped a secure arm around your body. you felt your heart explode in your chest at his sweet words. “i-i love you too, you’re so special to me.” he smiled at your words, and squeezed you tighter. “so let’s talk about that praise kink of yours-“ “my WHAT?”
you spent the rest of your night in each other’s arms. you talked about anything and everything. it wasn’t awkward after like you expected it to be, in fact, you felt even closer to him. it was such a sweet, but extremely sexy, experience and you were happy you got to have it with him. you went to bed that night in his arms, feeling extra loved and extra satisfied.
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risuola · 7 months
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PROMISE pt. 2 — F. READER x GOJO SATORU
Satoru promised he will never leave you.
cw: fluff, manga spoilers (more like the fight between two characters from chapters 223-235 is mentioned, no details whatsoever), FIX IT FIC because we need one, reader is pregnant – labor is briefed through — 1,5k words
a/n: one of TWO endings to PROMISE – this one is fluffy, it’s a fix-it fic if you will, it’s happy and pretty. If you’re feeling angsty, if you want to rub some salt into the wounds, check THIS ANGSTY alternate ending out!
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He made a promise, so he had to keep it.
It all felt abstract. Was Satoru really able to win? You knew he’s strong, hell, he’s the strongest, but still, can he beat Sukuna? Your breath hitched, you began feeling dizzy, and your stomach really began to hurt. Just few moments ago you felt like your little princess was sleeping, but as the time progressed, you began feeling pain. Your stress had to get to her finally and with all of your might you tried to calm yourself down even if only a little to not put your little one under the pressure of your nerves.
“Y/n?” Shoko squeezed your shoulder, “come with me, you really should breathe some air.”
“Huh?” You couldn’t even look at her, you were afraid that the second you take your eyes from the screens, something bad will happen. But you knew the worry in Ieiri’s voice, she spoke like this only when she faced something serious. “N-no, I’m fine, don’t worry.”
“Come.”
You didn’t know why she insisted, but you moved with great hesitance. And then it got to you.
In a matter of minutes, you were in another room, alone with Ieiri, as she was ordering people to gather everything needed because the moment you got in here, your waters broke. Yuji had to run for towels and clean clothes (which he did in a matter of few minutes) and Choso brought gloves and bottled water, because he insisted to help his brother. It’s not the best time, you thought. Your daughter still had a month to go, it wasn’t her time yet, but there wasn’t much you could do. It all happened too quickly, but maybe it was happening for a little while now and simply you were too focused on watching the fight, your mind too absent from what your own body signalized, because when Shoko checked, you were already fully dilated.
You imagined that day differently. Certain that it will be Ieiri who will deliver your baby, but you hoped for Satoru to be here, to keep your hand in his protective grip and you hoped for Megumi to meet his little step-sister. You thought it’ll look differently, that it won’t be a random, quite dingy room god knows where, you hoped it won’t be in the middle of a war. All of this didn’t matter, when you pushed for the first time. The adrenaline rushed through your bloodstream, your ear turned deaf to everything Shoko was saying, you just followed what your own body told you, pushing through the pain breathlessly for what felt like eternity.
And then, all of it was over. You barely registered when you cleaned up, dressed and Shoko used her abilities to heal your body enough for you to fight if needed. You walked back to take your place in front of the many screens, holding a newborn to your chest and with relief you noticed, Satoru was still standing.
“You alright?” Yuta asked, giving your shoulder a soft squeeze as he stood behind you.
“Yes. How’s he?” you replied, trying to analyze the battlefield. Satoru was still there, Sukuna was also looking good, all things considered. You should probably focus more on what just happened to you, but how could you, when your entire world was standing on the battlefield?
“Don’t worry about him so much, y/n. It’s Satoru Gojo we’re talking about. Better tell me how is she?”
She. Your daughter, the little bundle of love, now all in your hands. As you smoothed over the little cheek of your sleeping princess, you couldn’t help but wonder, if her coming to this world made even a fraction of a change that your husband’s birth made. She sure altered the balance of your world.
What you didn’t know, her appearance reached Satoru’s senses all the way back on the battlefield, and he grinned at the feeling. It’s like a wave of something unknown but at the same time very familiar hit him in the face and it gave him a kick of strength he never knew he needed. Now, he couldn’t lose. Not that he was planning to, but now, he just couldn’t.
“Oi, Megumi,” he called, looking at Sukuna that for the last couple of seconds stood there frozen, unable to move because the new, unknown feeling reached him as well. “You can feel her, right? Time to wake up Megs.”
“So naïve,” the curse chuckled, snapping out from the initial shock, “you still believe he’s gonna come back because of some brat being born? Oh, no, and let me tell you, once I’m done with you, I’ll make sure she’ll also be dea-“
The taunting tone was cut short when Ryomen tensed. Disoriented, he looked down at his hands, struggling to clench them into fists as they became stiff, fingers barely moving under the pressure of his muscles, as if he lost control over his own body. He groaned, pushing through with the movement, but stopped again, unable to make another step. Black markings glitched over his face and Gojo grinned wide.
“Good job, Megumi,” he praised. “Welcome back, kid.”
And then a rasped-out scream ripped through Sukuna’s throat, the one that’s desperate and annoyed, helpless once again as the vessel he had settled in began fighting him. So much work he had put into preparing Megumi’s soul to sink deep down into darkness, killing his sister, doing the ancient bath ritual, and now all of his efforts came into nothing, because what?
“G-gojo-“ a voice, much more familiar slipped over the tongue in Sukuna’s mouth. “Tsumiki, she’s dead, I-“
“It wasn’t you, Megumi,” Satoru cooed. “Suppress him, you can do it.”
“I can’t let him hurt my sister once again,” Fushiguro struggled, but the marks became more and more faded, and Sukuna’s cursed energy less and less apparent.
“Oh no, you definitely can’t.”
You couldn’t believe what you were seeing. You couldn’t hear anything, Mei’s crows provided only with vision, but even without voices, you could tell something odd was happening. Megumi was fighting back, Satoru’s shoulders relaxed just slightly, but his features betrayed the relief he felt, the happiness interlaced through his features, clearly pictured by his wide smile.
And then, just like that, maybe few minutes passed, when he was right in front of you, kneeling before you. You could feel the touch of his hands over your legs, his warmth crawling over your skin.
“Hello there,” he said casually, his tone soft and plush as if he wasn’t just battling the king of curses for god knows how long.
“Satoru,” his name slipped through your parted mouth. You couldn’t believe he was there, and as you looked up and to the side, Megumi was there too, with no signs of black cursed markings adorning his light skin and his hair pushed down, just as he would usually style it, probably being a result of Gojo’s hand messing with it. He smiled softly, keeping his distance, but you could tell his soul was in the right place. Sukuna that now was trapped inside of him would be another day’s problem, you figured.
“Welcome back, love,” your husband brought your attention back to him. “And hello, little princess,” he then pushed his face upon the baby in your arms, examining the tiny miracle that you held close to your heart. He looked into the blue irises of his daughter, smiling at the familiar color that surrounded by light eyelashes created a picture of mini him, but somehow, even better, because he could already see this cute nose of yours, the soft, feminine features that she inherited from you. “So I was right, she does have the same cute nose as you.”
“Oh, Satoru,” you sobbed quietly, brushing your hand through his white strands of hair, now sticky from all the blood that got into it. “Is that really over?”
“For now, it is. Our boy is back, I’ll figure out how to tame Sukuna inside of him later.”
“Come here,” you reached a hand to Megumi, but he hesitated, afraid that he’ll lost control and hurt you or his little sister. Eventually, he gave up underneath your demanding gaze and you took him into you, pressing a kiss to the top of his head.
Two strong arms of your husband then enveloped the three of you in the loving embrace and you couldn’t help but smile, finding his dried-out lips and pressing a kiss to them.
“I’m so glad you won,” you whispered to him, resting your forehead against his. “I’m so glad I have both of you back.”
Satoru just chuckled and Megumi smiled softly. Little that you know, it’s only because of the wave of new, fresh energy that bore so much of Satoru’s unique signature that spread all over the world the moment she was out of your womb. It’s her that gave your husband another impulse to act and it’s her who saved your foster son from losing himself completely.
Satoru promised he will never leave you. He promised that to your daughter and she herself made sure, he’ll keep that promise.
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tlou-reid · 11 months
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you found me ✰ spencer reid
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warnings ✰ gunshot, violence, mentions of maeve, hospitals, mentions of death, mentions of religion and god, angst let me know if i missed any please
summary ✰ spencer is the one to reach you after being shot by an unsub
notes ✰ inspired by you found me by the fray. please send requests here. & this is not edited
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spencer wasn't sure what dropped first: him or his gun. he could still hear hotch yelling after him, instructing him to not to go in. first not to go in the black suburban you always made jokes about. then, not to go in the yard of your home spencer had been begging you to move out of. then, not to go in the door of the house that he'd held open for you so many times. now, he could hear hotch's voice telling him not to go in the room, but he sounded like he was underwater. when spencer opened the door he could see morgan holding the unsub to the ground while he got him in cuffs, but, as soon as his knees hit the floor next to your body, everything in his peripherals went blurry.
he knew he should be doing the medical things he learned years ago, back during his training, but he couldn't. he was frozen, unable to do anything but stare at the gunshot wound beneath your left rib. his eyes started to well up with tears as his hands reached out, applying pressure, as if he could stop the bleeding himself.
as soon as his shaky hands landed on your body, all he could think of was maeve. how could he do this again? another person he loved, bleeding to death, all because of him. he felt so selfish. for everything. for moving on from maeve. for falling in love with you. for putting you in this position. for thinking of another woman while you bled out under his hands.
"reid, move," hotch's voice cut through his thoughts. spencer wasn't sure how long he'd been kneeling over you, but it was long enough for medical first responders to get there, get inside, and be ready to take over the job he was failing to do. still, he couldn't bring himself to move from his position. hotch had to pull spencer away, letting the medical team move in and get to work.
despite the tears welling up in his eyes, spencer hadn't starting crying. until now. he was sitting in the floor, with hotch behind him with an arm still wrapped around him when the first sob wracked his body. his whole body jerked as he wailed. hotch didn't know what to do, so he just wrapped his arms around spencer, holding the crying boy to his chest as if spencer was his own son. spencer's bloodied hands reached up to hold hotch's forearms, looking for something to ground himself.
the rest of the day was blurry. time seemed to be moving with super speed, but also not moving at all. spencer felt like a bystander in his own life as he watched them load you into the ambulance. he couldn't move his legs when they asked who was riding with you, so it was prentiss who climbed in, giving him a sad look as they closed the doors.
he rode in that stupid suburban, and neither him nor hotch uttered a word. the ride was completely silent. it wasn't the comforting silence like when you and spencer would sit on the couch, each holding your own book and just enjoying being around each other. this silence was scary. he could feel his heart beat in his temples, his stomach was churning and he couldn't stop tapping his foot. hotch didn't complain about his fidgeting the whole ride to the hospital.
they met prentiss in the waiting room, where she explained that you were in surgery now. there was no update on your state, and the rest of the team was waiting on a phone call from one of you guys to explain what was going on. morgan had called to inform prentiss that the unsub was in custody, and his other victim had passed. spencer didn't say anything in reply. instead, he moved to sit in the chair farthest away from where hotch and prentiss were standing, not wanting to listen to the details of the case.
this case was not one that should have even been on the BAU's radar. the local police knew who the unsub was, they caught him on camera after his first attack. there was no need for a profile, and definitely no need for the BAU to be spending their time on something as simple as a manhunt. until you called. you thought someone had been following you on your walk around the neighborhood, and it was proven that you were right. there was no solid reason why you were the next victim. there was relatively no similarity between you and the other victim, you just happened to be in the wrong place. when his larger frame pressed himself into the door, there was no stopping him. he shot at you, knocking you down, and eventually unconscious, while he looked for anything valuable in the house. spencer didn't know what he was trying to take, and he didn't really care either. all he cared about was you getting better.
one hour turned into two, and then two turned into three. he had somehow convinced prentiss and hotch to leave. he just wanted to be alone, and after a long phone call with garcia, he was. he had started to pace and his thoughts started to wander. he wanted someone, something to blame. sure, this unsub was the one who shot you, but what about the police? the ones who didn't try hard enough to find this guy before he was in your house? what about your neighbors? who weren't keeping an eye on you while you walked, even though you did numerous favors for them? what about him? a law enforcement officer that you were in love with but who wasn't there to protect you?
and lastly, what about God? being a man of science usually kept him from turning to a higher being. but a desperate man will take any chance he can get, and the best word to describe spencer right now was desperate. desperate for you to be okay. desperate for you to make it out of surgery. desperate to be next to you. desperate for someone to blame. so how could God do this? how could he allow something to happen to you? how could he punish spencer after all the good he had been trying to be doing for this world?
his thoughts went wild for what felt like years, but was only a few more hours, before the doctor was coming to get him. "dr. reid?" her voice came into the empty waiting room. his head snapped right to her. "she is out of surgery, she'll be waking up soon. you might want to be in the room when she does."
spencer stomach dropped the way he did earlier. he picked up the sweater vest and tie he had discarded on a waiting room chair and hurried to follow the doctor. when he reached the room, he was shocked at how peaceful you looked. despite all of the noises from the machines, the hospital room was the calmest place he had been in in the last 24 hours. spencer made himself comfortable while he waited for your eyes to flutter open.
and when they did, his eyes were on yours. he couldn't help the smile that spread across your face. it took a few minutes for you to adjust to the room. the noises, the bright lights, the lack of understanding where you were. the last thing you remembered was hitting the ground after having a gun pointed at you. after a few minutes, you turned to face him, "you found me." you smiled, despite the dryness in your throat as you spoke.
"just a little late." spencer shrugged, trying to downplay the guilt that was burrowed in his stomach. he reached forward, rubbing a few fingers along your cheek. "what happened?" you asked, wanting the whole story. spencer explained, leaving out a few parts. you didn't need to know how he couldn't bring himself to help you, or how he cried in hotch's arms, or how many times he had to wash his hands in the hospital's bathroom sink to get your blood off of him.
"that's kinda crazy," you couldn't help but laugh. spencer was mildly uncomfortable at your reaction. "so, when do i get to go home?"
"you don't," spencer begun, "you're moving out, like i have been asking you to." he could see the confusion written across your face. "you're moving in with me, that way i know you'll be safe." he smiled at you, excited at the idea. he had been wanting this for a while. "now get some rest," he said with a gentle tone, "i'll find us something to eat." despite the fact that he hadn't eaten in almost a day, he waited for you to be asleep to leave the room.
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littledemondani · 2 years
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all mine
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warnings: MINORS DNI! jealous!eddie, slight dom!eddie, possessive!eddie, unprotected sex, cheerleader!fem!reader, infidelity, reader and jason are together, creampie, dirty talk, mentions of drug use, jason is a douche, canon divergence, suggestive use of a lollipop
word count: 3.4k
a/n: this is just pure filth. i'm not even sorry. also, my requests are open! and let me know if you'd like to be tagged in my future stuff. you can read the prequel here.
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“or a gaaame where you toss balls into laundry baskets!” eddie yelled, his hands cupped to his mouth to amplify the sound of his voice as he stood on top of the cafeteria table.
“you want something, freak?” your boyfriend, jason, said as he stood up from his seat next to you, glaring daggers at him.
you sighed, rolling your eyes in complete annoyance at jason’s incessant need to belittle eddie at any given chance he gets. it was a tired game he played entirely by himself, given that eddie usually didn't give in to his antagonizing bullshit. but lately, he had started to counter back, and, like he’s doing at the moment, hurling the insults without being provoked.
and you’d be lying to yourself if you didn’t think it had anything to do with you.
for the past few months you had been sneaking around with eddie behind jason’s back. you knew it was wrong to go out on your boyfriend. he treated you well, bought you everything that you wanted, flaunted you in front of the entire school. he was every girl’s dream guy, the one they all fawned over. yet, you didn’t feel that way about him - not after getting to know the real jason.
the one he kept hidden, save for the moments when he bullied anyone who he didn’t think was on the same level as him. he didn’t see you as his girlfriend, he saw you as a trophy that he had won. the most popular guy in school dating the most popular girl. before you became head cheerleader he hadn’t even bothered to say more than a few words to you, but like everyone else, you had fallen under his pretty boy spell.
until eddie munson came into your life.
all you had needed was something to take the edge off. the pressure your parents put on you to be perfect - the perfect student, have perfect looks, and get into the college of their choice - had started to become too much. you knew from talks around school that eddie was a dealer, so you sought him out after school on a cold, december day. 
to say you were completely surprised by him was an understatement. the big, scary, metalhead freak was actually incredibly sweet, funny, and nothing like the villain everyone made him out to be. it was even more surprising when he said he felt the exact same about you. you hadn’t thought of yourself as being intimidating or scary in the least, but you figured being jason’s girlfriend probably had a lot to do with why he thought that of you.
the two of you hit it off right away, and kept seeing each other regularly after that day. you’d hang out every thursday before hellfire, then it became every tuesday and thursday, eventually turning into whenever you had free time. being around him felt like a breath of fresh air, like you could be yourself without fear of judgment.
your feelings for him developed naturally over time and you did everything you could to fight them off. having feelings for someone else that wasn’t your boyfriend wasn’t something you did. but on the night you were alone with eddie in his trailer, sharing a joint between the two of you, his big, dark brown eyes gazing into yours intently, you couldn’t hold back anymore.
when eddie leaned in closer, his lips dangerously close to your own, you didn’t stop him. when he kissed you, as if it had been the only thing on his mind for a long time, you didn’t stop him. when he reached his hand under your shirt, you didn’t stop him. you didn’t stop him from unbuckling your belt, pulling your shirt up over your head, or from fucking you multiple times. you wanted him, more than you had wanted anyone, and were relieved that he wanted you just as badly.
“jason,” you chastised, narrowing your y/e/c eyes up at him. “just let it go, please?”
he nodded, though he didn’t look away from eddie, and kept standing with his hands balled into fists at his side.
eddie stuck his tongue out at him, bringing his hands beside his head like the devil horns on his hellfire t-shirt. you couldn’t help the small snicker that escaped past your lips, and you covered it up with a cough once you realized you had done it out loud.
“freak,” jason mumbled under his breath as he sat back down, completely unaware of anything you had just done.
eddie’s hardened gaze fell to you, softening only when he made eye contact with you. you felt your heart flutter, and the familiar warmth that spread throughout your body each time eddie was around you. to keep from completely blowing your cover, you went back to sucking on the cherry-flavored lollipop perched between your fingers, like you had been doing before eddie’s public tirade.
he soon retreated to his own seat, but not before terrorizing some poor teacher just trying to leave back to her classroom.
jason shook his head, a look of disgust on his features as he turned to his friends. “which one of you is getting the beer for tonight?” he asked, once again oblivious to the apparent scowl on your face at the mention of alcohol.
“patrick and i are going after school,” andy said. “my brother is gonna buy it for us.”
you swirl the lollipop around in your mouth as you try to tune the boys out, completely uninterested in the conversation they’re having. your thoughts immediately go to eddie, of him glaring at jason not even moments ago, and how fucking hot he looked. you imagined how he’d be like in bed if he ever fucked his frustrations out on you. maybe he’d handcuff your wrists together with the cuffs hanging on the wall next to his bed, using you however he saw fit. and you’d gladly let him.
you'd let eddie do whatever he wanted to you if it meant you got to feel his long, thick cock deep inside of you. 
which is what you currently craved at that moment.
you glance over at his table hoping to grab his attention. he was talking to those kids, nancy wheeler’s little brother, and his shorter friend with the curly hair - you couldn’t remember their names. mike? justin? or what was it dustin? you watched as he picked them both up by their hellfire shirts, whispering something in their ears before slightly pushing them away towards another table.
eddie waited for the two freshmen to sit with a group of other lonely freshmen before he turned to walk back to seat, only to notice you looking in his direction.
you run your tongue over the top of the lollipop in a suggestive manner, keeping eye contact with eddie as you do so. you noticed him swallowing thickly, letting you know your spur of the moment plan was working.
you wrapped your lips around the candy, bobbing your head subtly, not wanting jason to see just what you were getting up to. he was still going on with his friends and forgot you were even there - what else is new, though?
eddie watched you intently, feeling the blood rush straight down to his cock. he was shocked that you’d do something so bold, seeing as it wasn’t like you, but the mere fact that you were, with your boyfriend sitting right next to you no less, turned him on way more than he’d like to admit.
gareth called out to him, and for a moment he broke eye contact to whip his head towards his floppy-haired friend. he made a ‘what are you doing?’ gesture at eddie. only then did he realize he was still standing in the middle of the cafeteria, on the verge of a fucking hard-on. he made his way back to the table and grabbed his stuff. he looked over at you and signaled for you to follow after him: a simple brush of his hand through his hair as he eyes you up and down.
you both came up with signals for when you couldn’t be seen together. some for regular talks, when one of you had a bad day and needed the other, or, like in this case, a quick fuck.
you wait for eddie to leave the cafeteria before standing up from your seat and glancing down at jason. “i’m gonna head out,” you said, gathering your backpack from behind the chair. 
jason doesn’t hear you over the loud chatter, too occupied with his friends to even notice you’d gotten up. you scoff, shaking your head as you push the seat in, and that’s when jason pays attention.
“where are you going?” he asked, turning in his chair to look up at you.
“if you had heard me the first time, i said i was gonna go.” you didn’t even try to hide the annoyance in your voice, but knowing jason, he’d be too clueless to even sense it.
“what? why? lunch isn’t over yet,” he said, brows furrowed slightly. just like you thought, completely clueless.
“i have that exam coming up in history that i have to study for, remember,” you lied, slinging your backpack onto your shoulders. “if i don’t at least get an A- you know my mother will kill me.”
he seemed to accept that answer, giving you a soft nod, and you leaned down to press a quick, chaste kiss to his cheek before walking out of the cafeteria.
you wandered down the desolate halls of hawkins high in search of eddie. all of the classroom doors were shut with the lights off, save for one at the end of the hallway. you recognized it as the one eddie used for hellfire, and you hurried towards it before anyone could see you. you knock once, twice, and wait for eddie to open the door for you.
he quickly closes the door behind you once you step in, making sure it’s locked so no one else can enter. once the coast is clear, and the two of you are secured inside, he turns to you with a lustful glint in his dark brown eyes.
“that little show you put on back there was definitely something. sucking on your lollipop like that, for me, in front of your boyfriend,” he said, emphasizing the last word with a hint of malice in his tone.
you pick up on it right away and it catches you off guard. eddie had never shown any disdain for your relationship in the three months that you’d been sleeping with him. he’d crack jokes here and there about jason not being able to satisfy you the way he could, which wasn’t a lie at all, he never made you cum whenever you fuck him.
was eddie starting to get jealous?
you couldn’t deny the thought of it added fuel to the already raging fire of arousal burning within you. 
“i don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said, feigning innocence as you gaze up at him with your big, y/e/c eyes. you swirl your tongue around the lollipop for good measure, hoping to get yet another rise out of him.
it worked.
eddie hummed in appreciation, though the look on his face told an entirely different story. “you see, princess, i think you know exactly what i’m talking about.” he reached forward and pulled the lollipop from your mouth, smirking at the shocked expression on your features. he holds it up in front of you, brow raised as he waits for you to admit what you both know is the truth.
the pet name effectively kills any ounce of rebellion you had in you, rendering you completely blank. it was a main weakness of yours that eddie loved to use to his advantage, not that you were complaining.
he took your loss of words as a win, smirking slightly as he slowly made his way over to you until he was mere inches away from your face. “you did that to rile me up, didn’t you? you wanted this. want me to fuck you.”
his close proximity to you, the smell of cheap cologne mixed with the faintest scent of cigarettes, has your head spinning with lust. you couldn’t keep up the charade of innocence anymore. you just wanted him. needed him.
“yes,” you whisper, feeling a rush of heat fan across your cheeks as you meet his darkened eyes.. it never failed to amaze you how easily eddie could reduce you to practically nothing without really even trying. 
“hm, who knew my girl could be so naughty,” he said thoughtfully, brushing his fingers down your cheek to your chin. he let his gaze linger on you for a moment longer, taking in your natural beauty before pressing his lips to yours. the kiss is a mix of soft, but needy. you could taste the remnants of cinnamon gum on his tongue. he broke away first, resting his forehead on top of yours. “if you wanted me to fuck you, all you had to do was ask.”
in a swift movement, he pushed your backpack straps off of your shoulders and hoisted you into the air, walking you back towards the D&D table. he carefully sat you on the edge, settling in between your legs as he leaned back in to kiss you heatedly. you both roamed your hands up and down each other’s bodies, needing to feel the other as close as possible. being apart from each other for majority of the day was frustrating for the both of you, and any time you’re together, you can’t keep from touching.
his hand found it’s way to your inner thigh, squeezing lightly before pushing up the hem of your cheerleading skirt to your pelvis. his fingertips toyed with the waistband of the spankies, groaning in annoyance.
“have i ever told you how much i hate when you wear these?” he asked, tugging the offending article of clothing down your legs and tossing them somewhere behind him. 
“only every time i wear them,” you giggle, hooking your fingers through one of the belt loops on his jeans and pulling him closer to you. you make quick work of undoing his belt buckle and jeans, pushing them as far down as you could. “you know i have to. unless you want the entire school to see my goods?”
“noooo thanks,” he said, helping you in removing his pants. he takes his cock in hand, pumping a few times while he pulls your panties to the side. he rubs the tip through your soaked pussy, sucking in a sharp breath as he feels just how wet you really are. “i’d rather them not.”
he pushes into you with ease, and you let out a loud, drawn out moan, your head tipping back. he stills once he’s filled you to the hilt, giving you time to adjust to his massive size.
“eddie,” you moan, rolling your hips against him in an attempt to get him to move. “we don’t have much time.” 
as much as he’d love to tease you right then and there, make you squirm and beg for him to fuck you, he knew you were right.
“tell me if it’s too much,” he said, thrusting into you with a fast, rough pace.
it was never too much any time eddie was concerned. in fact, it was never enough for you. you always wanted more than what he gave you. for it to be faster, harder, rougher. you wanted to be able to feel him for days after he was through with you. and he always gave you what you wanted, but not before making sure you were one hundred percent okay.
“oh fuck…!” you cried out, face contorting into pleasure as the tip of his cock brushed against your sweet spot. “mm..fuck, you feel so good, eddie.” 
“you feel so fucking good, too,” he moaned, gazing down at you as his bangs fell in front of his eyes. “best fucking pussy i’ve ever had.” 
he brought his hand to your cunt, and began rubbing fast, tight circles against your aching clit. he smirked as he watched you writhe beneath him, the way you clutched at him like your life depended on it, using your ankles to push him even further inside of you. he loved knowing he was the only one who could make you this way, reveled in it even, and a part of him wished he could have you like this all to himself.
“tell me, princess,” he said, leaning forward slightly so he could angle your hips a little better. “who do you belong to?”
the words are right there on the tip of your tongue, but you can’t find the strength to say them, not when he has you right there on the brink of your release. he senses your dilemma without you needing to say anything, and he slows down the speed of his thrusts, but not the intensity.
“y-you,” you mewl, brushing his hair out of his eyes. you make sure he knows you mean it. you kiss him deeply, bringing your hand to tug on his hair. “i-i’m yours.” 
“that’s right you are,” he breathes against your lips, resuming his previous fast pace. “all. fucking. mine.” he accentuated the words with his thrusts, each one significantly harder than the last.
you nodded rapidly, peppering kisses along his jaw down to his neck. you gently nipped at his sensitive spot, feeling him shiver a bit against you. you kept going, licking and sucking his skin until a soft pink mark appeared. you admired the way it looked in contrast with his light skin tone.
eddie’s cock twitched, signaling he was closer than he had anticipated.
“are you close?” he asked, cupping your face in his large hand as he gazed down at you. the metal of his rings felt cool against your heated skin, and you absentmindedly leaned into his touch.
“yes,” you moan, bringing your hand to cup his cheek as well. “are you close?”
“fuck yes i am,” he groaned, chuckling breathlessly. “you feel way too fucking good.” 
his fingers found their way back to your clit, determined to make you cum before him. “let go, baby. cum for me.”
the white hot pressure building up inside of you finally burst with a few more thrusts and swipes of his fingers, and you cum with a loud cry of his name.
he held you close to him to keep you from slumping over, pressing his lips to yours in a heated kiss. “cum inside of me,” you moan into the kiss, tugging on his long curls.
“are you sure? i will if that’s what y—,”
“it is,” you cut him off. “please…i just wanna feel you cum inside of me. please…”
eddie groans loud, giving one more heated kiss before pulling back. he grips your hips tightly, and chases his own release. it doesn’t take that long, and he shoots hot ropes of his cum deep within your walls.
you wrap your arm over his shoulder, holding him the same way he held you during your release. you press soft, soothing kisses to his cheek, your free hand resting behind his head.
once you've both come down from your respective highs, eddie reluctantly pulls out of you, groaning as a drop of his cum leaks from your entrance. “fuck that’s so hot,” he muses, bringing his finger to run through it before trying to push it back inside of you.
you chuckle in amusement, shaking your head lightly. “only you would think that’s hot.”
“any guy would agree that it’s pretty fucking hot to watch his cum spill out of a girl’s pussy,” he says matter of factly, though a smile tugs on the corner of his lips. 
he pulls your panties back over your cunt, patting it twice to make sure they stay in place. 
“dear god.” you hop off of the table, holding onto eddie’s arm for balance. he picks up your spankies off of the floor and helps put them on you, giving you a tender kiss once he’s done. 
“it’s even hotter knowing you’re gonna go back to your boyfriend with my cum inside of you.”
that shouldn’t have made your cunt throb the way it did, but then again you shouldn’t be doing anything you’ve been doing the past three months.
“and it’s really hot knowing you’ll be walking around with that hickey i made you,” you said, smirking as you gesture to the now reddened mark on his neck. “good luck trying to tell everyone how you got that.”
12K notes · View notes
hyunniesgirl · 6 months
Text
More than words
Pairing: Lee Know x fem!reader
Summary: your best friends are getting married and you're their maid of honor. They just forgot to mention that the best man and your partner in the wedding is the guy who broke you heart.
Word count: 6,394
Warnings: mentions of alcohol, drunk people, just fluffy and a tiny bit if angst, also there's a screenshot/fake text close to the end.
>> Masterlist <<
A/N: so, this was supposed to be a bday post for Lee Know but I couldn't finish it on time :( turns out I can't write under pressure and I still don't think this is good enough but I don't think I can do better this time lmao I'm sure he can feel my love even if it's a bit late(I wish) so happy late bday for my bias the most sassy and sexy man on earth!!!!
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You look at the invitation in your hands and sigh. You were really looking forward to your best friend's wedding. You were overjoyed when she told you Jeonghan had finally proposed and that she had chosen you as her maid of honor. You were excited to go out shopping to choose her wedding dress and enjoyed helping plan all the little details.
The thing is, Seojin forgot to let you know that the best man is going to be her best friend, your long-term crush and the guy who rejected you. Lee Minho, your wildest dream and worst nightmare embodied.
You, Seojin, Jeonghan and Minho had met in college and you fell in love at first sight. Yeah, kinda cheesy, right? You always had been a logical person so love at first sight sounded like bullshit to you, until it actually happened.
It was the strongest, most nerve wracking emotion you ever felt in your life. The way every move he made, every word he said, every smile he gave you, just made your entire world turn upside down.
You never really put a lot of effort into hiding that you liked him, seizing every opportunity to hit on him but he never really gave you the time of day, brushing it off as a joke.
A year ago, you decided to confess to him. You told him about your feelings for but it was no surprise when he turned you down.
You already guessed he didn't feel the same way as you did, you just thought it best to regret what you have done rather than what you haven't. And you did regret doing it in the end. Your heart was broken and you felt empty, you haven't spoken to him since that day. So to know you'll have to spend a whole weekend in his presence is not something you're looking forward to.
>>>
You came to the airport right after you clocked out of work. It's not a long trip, so you try to make yourself comfortable while you're in the plane.
As the maid of honor, you have to help the guests during the weekend, this is your job so Seojin can relax before her wedding.
So when you feel someone sitting by your side, you put your best smile on, ready to introduce yourself.
Your smile disappears when you see Minho there, he has his usual smug smile on his lips and an eyebrow raised, staring at you and waiting for you to continue.
"Oh, it's you", you say, feeling your cheeks warm, turning around to look out of the window.
"I expected a more heartwarming greeting", he jokes, "we are partners for the weekend after all"
'Don't even get me started on that', you think, sighing.
You should be nice to him, at least while you're on wedding duties, he didn't do anything wrong after all. But you're embarrassed, the last time you talked to each other was when he rejected you.
"How have you been?" He asks when you don't say anything.
"Fine", you give him a forced smile, "and you?"
"As usual", he answers, shifting in his seat, uncomfortable.
"Dating someone?" You ask and his head snaps at you, he didn't think you'd want to know something like that. You sure are having the same reaction, cursing yourself with every name you know, you really can't help yourself, you're an idiot.
"Not really", he clears his throat, he thought you'd have forgotten all about him after so much time but he feels strange knowing you still want to know about that, "you?"
You shake your head, no. You're not dating anyone since you didn't get over him yet. It's pathetic really, a whole year went by and you're still hung up on him.
You don't talk much for the rest of the trip, you just make small talk about his plans with Jeonghan for the weekend. Minho missed you, more than he could have expected, so it's nice having time with you again.
You have always known Jeonghan is rich, but to book a room for every one of their guests at a five star hotel it's a whole other level of wealthy. You're already dreaming about the long bath you're going to take on the hydromassage in your room, after that you're going to lay in the comfortable hotel bed and relax for the rest of the night, maybe check again your plans for tomorrow.
"Mr. Lee", the receptionist says to Minho, giving him the keycard. She looks at you, waiting for you to get closer to the counter, "What can I do for you, Miss…?"
"Oh, it's Y/N L/N", you say, stepping closer. The woman taps something and frowns.
"You're in room 143", she says and you smile politely, waiting for your keycard, "together with Mr. Lee", she points to Minho, who's looking at his keycard and showing it to you.
You take a deep breath.
"There must be a mistake, we are not together, we have to be in different rooms"
"I'm sorry, there must have been a mistake in the booking", she smiles apologetically, "we can give you a full refund"
"There's no need, I can just stay in another room"
The woman presses her lips in a thin line, looking at the other receptionist by her side.
"I'm sorry, but we are fully booked"
You take a moment to understand what she's saying. So there's no room for you? That's great.
"I'll just go to another hotel", you sigh, stepping away.
"I'm afraid it will be hard for you to find another hotel miss, it's the weekend and there are a lot of weddings happening at this time of the year"
"What am I supposed to do, then?", you ask, trying not to freak out.
You can't stay with Seojin since she's the bride and the other bridesmaids magically found a partner to bring to the ceremony so there's nowhere for you to sleep.
"Just stay with me", Minho sighs, running his hands through his hair. "It's your room too anyway"
You stare at him for a whole minute, trying to think of a way to get out of this, but you can't. You have to stay close to Seojin for the wedding plans and you really want to stay in this hotel.
"Do you have a better idea?" He asks, seeing the frown in your face.
You sigh, shaking your head, there's nothing much you can do. You follow Minho to the elevator, pressing the bottom and waiting for the doors to open. A crowd starts to form around you, pushing you together into the confined space. Minho is crushed against the wall and you're being pressed against him, as if things aren't already bad.
"We should have waited to catch the next one", you whisper and he sighs.
"Is not like we had a choice"
You want to fight him, you want to blame him for all this situation. If he didn't reject you, you would be together now and you wouldn't mind being pressed against him. You wouldn't mind the warmth growing in your lower stomach just by the touch of his skin on yours.
The moment people get out on the second floor, you step away from him, trying to hide your red face. You walk together in the corridor, your mind is so full you forget the situation you are in, but when you enter the room you see the bed. There's only one bed. You completely forgot this is a room for a couple, as if it's not enough that you have to sleep in the same room with Minho, you'll have to share the same bed too? If there's a god, he must be laughing at your face right now.
"Do you want to shower first?" Minho's voice takes you out of your thoughts and you turn around to look at him.
"Yeah, thanks"
You grab your bag and go into the bathroom. It's okay, you don't have to freak out, you are in a five star hotel, in a really nice suite, you can manage to survive the weekend.
When you packed your things, you were planning on sleeping alone so you are lucky you actually brought pajamas even though you always sleep in your underwear. This pajama is not the most decent one but it's what you have at the moment.
The hot bath does wonders to relieve your stress, you use the expensive shampoo and hair conditioner and massages your body with some nice body lotion, ready to have a good night of sleep.
Minho's seated by the bed when you get out of the bathroom, his clothes are folded by his side and he's scrolling on his phone. He lifts his eyes towards you, freezing instantly. What the hell are you wearing? He feels the warmth going up his neck, cheeks and his ears.
"A-are you done?" He stutters for the first time since you've known him.
"Yeah, the hair conditioner is really nice, look how soft my hair is now", you step closer to him, tilting your head so he can touch your hair.
"I'll try it myself", he walks past you. You must have taken a lot of time in there for him to be in such a hurry.
When Minho gets out of the bathroom you're already sleeping, you're laying down on your stomach with your round ass bursting out of your shorts or whatever is that thing you're wearing, he's sure he'll go crazy in the next two days if you keep this up.
>>>
When you go into the restaurant and see Seojin, you want to commit a murder. You know that face she's making, it's the face she has when she did something mischievous and is trying to hide it.
"So it was YOU", you slap her arm, sitting in front of her at the table. The other girls didn't seem to have arrived yet.
"I don't know what you're talking about", she smiles looking at you with doe eyes.
"You know exactly what I'm talking about, really, you put us in the same room?"
She sighs in defeat. Seojin knows better than to keep pretending, you know her too well to believe in any excuse she'll come up with.
"I just want my two best friends to make up", she smiles, "it's my wedding after all"
"I get that, but you could have thought about a better way", you sigh, calling for the waiter and asking for a bottle of wine. "I won't ruin your weekend", you smile, grabbing her hand to squeeze it, "but you're done for when we go back"
She shivers, you're really scary when you get mad. But it's worth the risk, she knows you're not over Minho and she wants to help you get together.
"Leave the whole bottle", you ask the waiter that just came back to your table bringing the wine and two glasses, "and keep bringing more when you see I'm out of it", you ignore his look of pity.
You're going to have lunch with Seojin and the bridesmaids, then you're going to pick your dress up and bring it to the hotel for you to wear tomorrow.
Soon enough the bridesmaids arrive, there are only three, Seojin's cousins and Jeonghan's sister. They won't shut up about their partners, that aren't even official or anything. You can't believe they brought just about anyone to your best friend's wedding and you absolutely are not being petty because you were forced to stay in the same room as Minho because they all had partners.
After setting the date for your meeting later in the night, you go to pick up your dress. You had to make some last minute changes and were lucky they were available to assist you immediately.
The first thing you do when you get to your room is to try on the dress, making sure it's perfect for the next day. You struggle a bit to put it on, since it has a zipper in the back, but you manage it.
You stare at your reflection in the mirror, you look nice. The green really enhances the color of your eyes and it's going to look perfect with your makeup and hair done.
You feel a sudden tug in your hair, a few strands got stuck in the zipper somehow. Perfect. You pull it a couple of times but with no success until you pull it so hard the zipper actually breaks.
"Oh no no", you whine looking at the big problem you have in your hands.
The door opens behind you and Minho enters, staring at you for a moment, you look beautiful. He would have admired you for a whole hour if it wasn't for the desperate look in your face, that's when he sees that your dress is open in the back with some of your hair stuck in the zipper.
"Are you alright?" He asks, you look at him trying to calm yourself down. What are you going to do? The wedding is tomorrow.
"I messed up", you tell him, tears brimming in your eyes, "I ruined my dress, how am I supposed to go to the ceremony?"
There's no way you can get it fixed, there's a lot of weddings happening this weekend and it's Saturday afternoon, there's not going to be a tailor available.
Minho can see the gears turning in your head, you're overthinking. He gets closer to you, grabbing you by the shoulders, making you look at him.
"Hey!" He says, loudly enough to catch your attention, "calm down! We can find a way to fix it!"
He's looking deeply into your eyes, telling you to take deep breaths and you do just that, calming down a bit in a few minutes.
>>>
Minho had his fair share of broken hearts, sometimes he was the one crying over the end of a relationship and sometimes someone else was in that position. He liked you more than as a friend, he knew that since the beginning of your friendship but he never opened up enough to form another type of relationship with you. So when you confessed to him, he felt so many things at the same time.
He was happy that you felt the same way as him, mad he didn't know about it sooner but mostly, he felt scared, your friendship was so important to him that he didn't want to ruin it by dating you. What if you two broke up later? How could you still be friends?
That fear made him turn you down, he regretted it the moment you walked out of the cafe you were meeting up and in a certain way, he did ruin your friendship, since you didn't speak to him after that day and he couldn't bring himself to contact you too.
He knew Seojin was the one who pulled this stunt of putting you together in the same room, she always loved to play cupid. He just didn't expect he would like the situation so much, he missed you a lot, more than you could ever imagine.
Seojin was waiting for him at the lobby, she wanted to go for a walk and talk, to settle some little things about his role in the wedding.
"Finally, you're here!" She smiles, squeezing him in a hug and he does the same.
"Did you wait long?" He asks.
"Nope, I just had lunch with Y/N", she answers, eyeing Minho and waiting for his reaction to the mention of your name, he chuckles.
"So, did you have to put us in the same room?" He asks, raising an eyebrow and crossing his arms. Seojin smiles, giving him puppy eyes.
"If I didn't you wouldn't speak to each other, I'm sure of it", she huffs.
"I would try talking to her, you know that"
"Yeah, but she'd probably run every time, that's why I had to go to this extent", Seojin starts walking and Minho follows her.
"I guess you're right", he says, tucking his hands in his pockets.
"Didn't you regret turning her down? I know you like her too"
"It doesn't matter if I regret it or not, she hates my guts now"
They walk for about five minutes before Seojin takes a deep breath and starts talking again.
"I know I shouldn't meddle into this but you're both my best friends so I feel like I have the right to intervene when you're just being dumb", Minho glares at her, "I'm sure she still likes you, Min"
Do you, though? You can't even look him in the eyes. You don't want to talk to him. He wants to believe in what Seojin is saying but he's afraid he lost his chance with you.
When he sees you almost bawling your eyes out because of the dress, he knows he has to do something, anything for you.
"So, I called someone I know that lives here in the island with her family and her grandma is a former tailor, she wants to check the dress and see what can be done", Minho says, looking at you sitted by the bed, your hands gripping the ruined dress.
You get up in a jump, wrapping your arms around his neck and squeezing him.
"Thank you so much, Min, I don't even know how to repay you", you realize too late how close you two are from each other. Stepping aside, you give him a sheepish smile, mumbling a "sorry"
He clears his throat, turning around and walking to the door, trying to hide the blush in his face.
>>>
Seojin held the position of the most beautiful woman you've ever seen… until now. You're seeing Minho's friend but she doesn't look real, she's so gorgeous that for a moment it looks like she's walking in slow motion.
What takes you out of your haze is the awkward interaction between them. Minho said she is someone he knows but are acquaintances close enough to ask for favors? And the way they are interacting tells you they're not friends either.
She's smiling at Minho and he's just there, nodding, there's not a single glance of affection in his behavior. He's not like this, sometimes he may seem cold and a bit mean, but he's the sweetest with the ones he likes, you know that because you used to be one of them.
"So, I'm Mina", she looks at you with a big smile and you greet her, telling your name. "Is this the dress?" She asks, looking at your garment bag.
"Yes, thank you so much for accepting to help", you say and she chuckles.
"Anything for Minho", she looks at him with a smile and you feel your chest ache even though he keeps a straight face.
She leads you into the house, it's a beautiful traditional construction. Her grandma is waiting in the living room and she asks Mina to make some tea while she looks at the dress.
"Can you help me bring the things?" She asks Minho and he nods.
The old lady is very nice, she tells you about her years of experience as a tailor and how she had to fix absolute disasters in her days, so your case will be easy peasy, she just has to replace the zipper with a new one.
"Give me half an hour", she reassures you with a smile and then looks around, "can you go see why my granddaughter is taking so long?" She asks and you nod, getting up and following a path you think leads to the kitchen.
"Does she know about us?" You hear Mina's voice and stop in your tracks, you shouldn't eavesdrop, right? Then why can't you move? Your heart starts beating so loudly you're not sure you'll be able to hear his answer.
"Let's not talk about that while she's here", Minho asks, sighing. "I'll meet you when you come to Seoul and we can talk"
You can't breathe. So they are not just friends, you feel dumb. Of course Minho would like a supermodel like her, even though you are beautiful you can't really compete with that.
You go back to the living room. You can't look at their faces after what you heard, is it immature? Yes, but it's not a secret that you're not over Minho and listening to him, thinking about him meeting with another woman just makes your heart break again, even though you thought the pain you were feeling would end after he rejected you last year.
"Are you alright?" He asks when he sits by your side, smiling slightly at you and you nod awkwardly.
Would you have gotten over him already if he just had said you are not his type? He just said he couldn't be more than friends with you, was he trying to be nice?
The old lady refuses to get paid for fixing your dress, she says it was so easy it shouldn't even count as a service, in return she asks you to come by again when you're in Jeju because she liked you. You thank her again, saying your goodbyes and walking to the car while she asks Minho for something only a man can do, since her son is not home yet.
You put the dress in the backseat of the car, finally breathing relieved.
"So you're the one I should thank", you're startled by Mina's voice behind you.
"Oh, for what?" You ask, turning around with a hand on your chest.
"For bringing Minho here", she smiles sadly and you frown. "I guess he didn't tell you", she says.
"I know that you're a thing or something like that", you say, is she trying to rub it in your face? Is she feeling threatened?
"Oh", she laughs, "no, we are not a thing"
"I don't understand, then", you say, trying to not smile, feeling a weight being lifted out of your chest.
"We dated a few years ago, but I did something terrible to him, I know he hated me after that", she sighs, "I've been trying to meet him for so long to apologize but he never gave me the time of day, so imagine my surprise when he willingly called me to ask for a favor", she smiles, "I guess you must mean a lot to him"
You feel your heart sink, did he really do that for you? You don't know what she did, but you know Minho doesn't forgive someone easily and he surely doesn't like to owe a favor to someone that did something bad to him.
"Anyways", she says awkwardly after you stare at her without saying a thing, "thank you, I hope you make him happy", she smiles, nodding to you and heading back.
Make him happy? Does she think you two are together? Did she notice you were jealous?
So many questions and no answer at all. You snap out of your thoughts when the gate to the house is closed with a loud noise. Minho walks to you, opening the door.
"Are you not getting in?"
You don't speak much on your trip back to the hotel, your head is just so full of thoughts you don't think you'll be able to form a sentence if you try to speak. Besides that, it's almost time for your outing with Seojin and the other bridesmaids, Minho's also in a hurry so you guess he has something planned with Jeonghan and the groomsman as well, so you both run to your room to get ready.
You're the first to shower since you'll take longer to dress up. You don't take too long, letting Minho go in while you do your hair and makeup in the wall mirror in the bedside.
You put on a tight navy blue dress, it's long enough to cover your ass but not enough to make it proper.
Minho comes out of the bathroom already dressed, he's wearing a white button down that looks heavenly as if it was made just for him and jeans that just embrace his toned thighs.
"You can take a picture if you want", the smirk on his lips makes you scoff, taking you out of your state of haze.
"Well, it's no secret that you're handsome", you point out, "I did fall in love with you after all"
Minho stops in his tracks, he did not expect you to bring that up. Do people that still have feelings for the other joke about it? He wants to believe he still has a chance, but the way you act, so nonchalantly, makes him insecure.
"You're pretty too", he says, ignoring your remark.
"Not as much as Mina", your voice sounds more bitter than you meant it to be, "she's really gorgeous"
You turn around, picking up your purse, you don't want him to see your face full of contempt and jealousy. You walk out of the room, not waiting for his answer, cursing yourself till you get to the lobby to find your friends.
There's nothing like a girl's night out to take all your worry away. You drink, flirt with strangers, play games, take a tour around Jeju eating delicious foods, go to karaoke and walk by the beach.
Around midnight the bridesmaids take a taxi back to the hotel but you and Seojin want to drink more and have more fun since it's her last day as an unmarried woman.
The fresh air of the beach sobers you up, you're still a bit dizzy, but not as wasted as before. Your friend is worse than you, she's stumbling and laughing at nothing.
"I love you so much", she says, grabbing your face and cupping your cheeks, "you know that, right?"
You chuckle, putting your hands over hers.
"Of course I know, and I love you too", she smiles, stumbling and falling down on the floor.
"My butt", she whines, caressing her sides.
It seems like she's too wasted now, it's time to go back. You call Jeonghan, asking him if he can come pick you two up by the beach and as the gentleman he is, he didn't drink because he knew his fiancee would get too drunk to even walk and need someone to pick her up. You laugh at his answer and wait for him, it's good to know Seojin will have someone to take care of her like that.
You all were friends in college and you love Jeonghan, but you were always closest to Seojin. She came up to you and asked to be your friend on the first day of school when you were all alone since you didn't know anyone in the city, much less in that university.
You stare at the waves in the ocean, it's really calming to feel the breeze and the sound of the sea.
"My love", Seojin screams, looking behind you. She gets up and runs before you can help her. You turn around to find Jeonghan and Minho coming in your direction. Seojin jumps into her fiance's arms, giggling and kissing his face.
"Are you alright?" Jeonghan asks her and she nods frantically, mumbling 'better now' while resting her head on his shoulder. He looks at you with a brow lifted, questioning and you chuckle, nodding.
"What about you?" Minho asks and you roll your eyes, walking in a straight line to prove you're fine but your body betrays you and you trip on your own feet. You don't fall since Minho wraps his arms around your waist holding you. Why do his hands feel so good on you, when he's holding you? Why must you still feel this way after being rejected? Don't you have any pride left? Those ungodly reflexes he has are annoying sometimes, you'd rather he'd let you fall face first on the sand.
"Are you sure?" He asks, a judging look in his face.
"Yes, I'm sure", you say, stepping away from him.
Maybe you're still a little bit tipsier than you thought.
He glances at Jeonghan and he shrugs, they take you and Seojin to the car, securing you two on your seatbelts. The trip back is noisy, unfortunately Seojin is not a sleepy drunk, she gets even more energetic in her intoxicated state. So she tells Jeonghan and Minho about everything you did during your outing, every detail, even that three guys tried to take you home after you drunk flirted with them.
You give your goodbyes in the lobby, since they are staying in another wing of the hotel. You and Minho go to the elevator and you notice he's drunk too, he tries to hide it, but he keeps stumbling and has to lean on the elevator's wall to keep standing.
"I think you're much prettier than Mina", he blurts out of nowhere and your head snaps at him, a frown in your face. "You didn't let me finish earlier, I was going to say that you're the prettiest girl in the world for me"
The doors to the elevator open and he walks away, like what he just said didn't leave you completely lost. You feel your heart beat faster, following him to your room and leaning on the door after you close it, staring at him while he walks around the room.
Your mind is full of thoughts, why is he always so nice to you? You suddenly have the preposterous urge to tell him again you're in love with him, it must be the alcohol, but maybe you need him to tell you he doesn't like you in that way, maybe if you're humiliated one more time you'll be able to let him go.
"You shouldn't be nice to me", he looks at you, brows furrowed in confusion, "if you do I'll cross the line you drew last year", you stumble a bit, trying to get to him and he holds you. "I'll kiss you if you don't stop me", you say, noticing how close you're from each other.
Minho doesn't say anything, his head is spinning a bit and he's sure you're bluffing. He's so wrong, though. He realizes that only when your lips come crashing on his, he doesn't even have time to process what's happening before you push him away, stepping aside.
"I-I'm sorry", you say, 'of course he won't reciprocate', you think.
However, contrary to your expectations, he wraps his arms around your waist, pressing his hand on the small of your back and pulling you back to his embrace, kissing you. His lips are soft and his movements are rushed like he's been waiting to do that for a long time.
Maybe you're just dreaming while awake, it's impossible for him to be kissing you, right?
You wake up feeling your head hurting like crazy, your mouth is dry and you feel sick. Suddenly what happened comes crushing in, did you actually kiss Minho? And the most important part, did he reciprocate? You can't remember, the last thing that you recall is kissing him but everything after that is just a blur.
You look around the room, trying to find him and when you realize he's nowhere to be seen, you can only draw one conclusion. It seems you've been rejected once more.
It's okay, now you feel like you can get over this crush, you two didn't have a future anyway. You want to cry, you really do, but you can't show up to your friend's wedding with puff eyes and you don't want to stay in this room for long, you don't want to meet him again until the wedding. So you grab your dress and the things you'll need and take it to the bridal suite.
Minho is happy, you still like him after all. After you two kissed you fell asleep, he tucked you in bed and watched you. You were always a sleepy drunk, when he's more like Seojin. He feels energetic until the exhaustion hits him.
He wakes up early, to grab some coffee and hangover medicine for you two, but when he comes back waiting to find you awake, you're nowhere, your things are not there either. Did you regret kissing him? Maybe you just wanted to feel something familiar with him. No, he's not going to let these intrusive thoughts make him assume things, he needs to talk to you.
And he would, if you answered his calls or his texts. He freaks out even more when his phone buzzes with a bunch of texts.
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>>>
You're trying to distract yourself, telling stories about your college times with Seojin to the other bridesmaids and helping the bride relax before her big moment. You don't want to tell her about the whole thing with Minho, you don't want to turn her big day into a drama about yourself.
She keeps frowning while looking at the phone, the ceremony is going to start in less than thirty minutes so it's understandable that she's nervous.
She looks at you with desperate eyes.
"The wedding planner just texted me saying there is something wrong with the menu, can you check it for me?"
"Of course, I'll be back as soon as possible", you smile reassuring her. It's weird though, you went through all the details with the staff before meeting with Seojin.
You walk to the kitchen, looking for the wedding planner and finally finds her talking to the waiters.
"Hey, what's wrong with the menu?" You ask the older woman and she looks at you, confused.
"What do you mean?" She asks, "there's nothing wrong"
You frown, looking around. Seojin clearly told you the wedding planner was the one to report the issue, so it's impossible for her to not know about it.
"Hm, Seojin told me there was a problem?!"
"She must be confused, honey, brides get really stressed, maybe she read some of my texts wrong", she tries to reassure you and you nod, not really buying it. Seojin is a perfectionist, she wouldn't make this kind of mistake. But if the wedding planner is telling you there's nothing wrong then there's nothing you can do about it.
You walk back to the bridal suite, twenty minutes till the ceremony. When you open the door there's no one else there, where did they go? You look around trying to find someone but they're not even in the dressroom. The door opens behind you and you turn around ready to ask where's everyone, when you see Minho closing the door.
He stares at you for a few seconds, waiting for your reaction.
"Did you regret kissing me?" He asks, taking a few steps towards you.
"What are you talking about?" You say, trying to sound nonchalantly even though you want to cry just by looking at his face.
"You kissed me, you should take responsibility", he gets closer.
You feel your throat dry, taking a step back.
"You're the one who left me by myself", you mumble.
"I just went out to buy meds for us, why did you assume things?"
"Of course I'd assume things, you rejected me once, why wouldn't you do it again?" You point out, feeling angry and your answer feels like daggers being shot at him.
He takes a deep breath, grabbing both your hands and holding it close to his chest.
"There's not a day I don't regret turning you down that time", he sighs, "the truth is that I liked you since the first time I saw you but I couldn't ruin our friendship and I was so scared that I wouldn't be enough for you, like I wasn't enough for her"
You know about who he's talking about and want to kick him for even thinking you're anything like Mina, but most you want to punch her in the face, she broke his heart and left him in crumbles.
"I would never do anything to hurt you", you whisper, he's so close to you know, you can feel his breathing hitting your face.
"I know, I was scared that time and I'm still scared", he lifts your hand to his lips, "but if you give me one more chance I promise I'll be better, no one's gonna love you more than me and I'll always be there for you"
You waited for this for so long you're not even sure if it's happening.
"Can you pinch me?" You ask and he smirks.
"I can bite", he slides his hands to your waist, getting closer and giving a peek to your lips, biting your lower lip, making you shiver.
"Now I know it's real", you say, staring into his dark eyes.
"Should I take this as a yes?" He asks and you nod.
"I have been yours ever since I met you, there's not another answer but yes when it comes to you"
He smiles, the brightest smile you ever seen on him, then he kisses you, and he wants you to remember this one for the rest of your life.
Walking down the aisle with the other bridesmaids and groomsmen, arms linked with Minho's while exchanging knowing smiles, you can't help but imagine if one day it's going to be you two there. Minho on the other side is already planning how he's going to propose, because he's absolutely sure next time it's going to be you in a wedding dress and him waiting patiently for your hand.
936 notes · View notes
d0youc0py · 11 months
Note
Could you do any 141 member (I don’t really care I love them all) comforting civilian!reader while she’s on her period? Like the cramps, nausea, mood swings?
Thanks!
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He winced as another pained groan left your lips.
“Pain killers didn’t help?” He frowned. He laid down behind you tucking you against him. He pressed a kiss to the back of your head, his hands pressing down on the heating pad against your stomach. The pressure made you feel better and you softly grabbed his hand and put it under the heating pad, silently asking him to massage your stomach. “I got you.” He pressed another kiss to your shoulder.
“Are you done with your paperwork yet?” You whined.
“Ya, Sweetheart.” He lied. The thought of leaving you alone to suffer on the couch made his stomach turn. “You rest up, now and I’ll fix us some dinner later, yeah?”
“Don’t leave till I fall asleep please.” You requested, scooting closer to him.
“Wouldn’t dream of it.”
He’s literally the dream partner when it comes to this stuff
He has always been a very nurturing person
He has your special week marked on his calendar so he’s never caught off guard if you snip at him or you wake up and need to change the sheets
When he can’t be with you he always ships a care package to your house with all the things you could possibly need (snacks, pads/tampons, medicine, a card saying how much he loves you)
He’s the best honestly
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“Kid, open the door!” The door handle jiggled. You splashed cold water over your face trying to calm down, but no matter how hard you tried sobs wracked your body. You blamed the hormones. You and Simon were new in your relationship, about five months in, and you had just recently started spending the night at his place. You always had a plan for what to do if you got your period during the night but you didn’t plan for it to come almost a week early. You woke up feeling a familiar wetness and practically ripped yourself out of Simon’s arms. To make matters worse he had his thigh resting between your legs, meaning- you didn’t even want to say it. You shook the thoughts out of your head.
“Sweetheart, c’mon.” Simon sighed from the other side of the door. “You know what I do for a living, yeah? You think a little blood is gonna scare me off? I find that a bit offensive if I’m being honest.”
“It’s disgusting and embarrassing!” You shouted through your sobs.
“It’s not disgusting.” He shot back. “Whoever made you feel that way is a cunt. And it might seem embarrassing now, but I promise you in a week it’ll make you laugh. Out you come.” He shook the door handle again. He did make you feel better. “There she is.” He whispered. You looked him over, happy he had changed his sleep shorts. A clunky thumb wiped away a few remaining tears.
The man is completely unbothered
You can throw a whole hissy fit and he’ll just ask if you’ve eaten anything today
Bodily fluids don’t faze him at all- you could bleed, vomit and cry all over him and he’d just pat you on the back
He’s still doesn’t always understand how to take care of other people, so if you want/need him to do something all you have to do is ask
He never ever makes you feel bad/embarrassed about anything
“Si, you aren’t going to believe the blood clot that just came out of me.” “I’m proud of you Sweetheart.”
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“I just can’t believe he did that to her!” You sobbed, wiping your eyes on your husbands shirt.
“What a bastard.” He growled, wiping a tear from his own eye. He wrapped an arm tighter around you, throwing a few pieces of popcorn into your mouth.
“Get off the screen!” You shouted, throwing a few pieces of popcorn at the TV.
“Ya, fuck off!” Johnny yelled after you tossing a few pieces as well. You both looked at each other before bursting into a giggle fit.
Every time you on your period it seems like Johnny also goes on his
You would think both of you being so emotional would cause problems, but it really makes you feel less alone
He definitely steals higher grade pain meds from the base to help you (Price caught him and started doing it for his own partner)
Absolutely loves to take warm showers with you
This man is also unfazed by bodily fluids ;)
Whenever you feel sick he is on the other side of the door cheering you on
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You hated when you got your period and he wasn’t here. It always reminded you of how sucky life was before him and how much spoiled you are now. You pressed yourself deeper into his pillow, inhaling his scent. Your muscles relaxed slightly- but it was nothing compared to the real thing. The pain killers had yet to kick in and your body felt so hot and uncomfortable. Your ears piqued up when you heard the door open.
“Babe?”
“Ky!” You screeched. The ache in your stomach couldn’t stop you from running through the flat to greet him. “What are you doing here? Your not suppose to be home for another two weeks?” You questioned between both of you pressing kisses against each other.
“I can just stay for two days.” He sighed, scooping you up. “I told Cap you weren’t feeling well- and let’s just say being the favorite has its perks.”
If you thought Price was good wait till you meet Kyle He definitely learned it from Price
Total Princess treatment to the max
“Ky, I can tie my shoes.” “Don’t worry bout it love.”
He shows love through acts of service so this is his time to shine ✨
Has a stash of all your favorite snacks/drinks for when the time comes
He usually puts you between his legs and the two of you play video games for the next eight hours- distraction helps take you mind off of the pain
2K notes · View notes
neonovember · 9 months
Note
Coming in HOT with some ANGST and FLUFF, having SUCH an intense emotional fight with Carmen one night. Maybe you’re both arguing about the opening of The Bear or finances or even just with communication in your relationship, Carmen just snaps about how you weren’t always this hostile. Just losing it on him and in tears crying out “YOU LEFT!! YOU LEFT ME CARMEN!! I understand what happened with you and your brother, but you just fucking left and didn’t even say goodbye!! You know how AWFUL that made me feel?! Like all of a sudden after everything we’d been through! It was like suddenly I was another face you just cut out and forgot about. It took me MONTHS to stop even just thinking about you. And then when you came back? It was as if nothing happened, but I was SO happy you were back….and now you always act like I’m some inconvenience that’s always in the way!!!! So what do you WANT Carmen?! Do you want me to stay or is this another New York situation?”. You can see Carmen’s heart shattering in his face as he just crumbles at the end begging for forgiveness 🥲. It ends maybe with the both of you holding each other in the kitchen “I’m so sorry” “No no….it’s okay….I shouldn’t have taken it out on you like that…”
All for you
this request was so good! your brain anon..😍 i hope i did it justice, this is part one of two because i always seem to be extending things that should be a one shot! i'm thinking part two should be from carm's pov? what do you guys think??
warnings: shouting, self deprecation, angst to the tenth power, no happy endings, carmen is so so so bad at communicating, unresolved tension/anger, new york carmy!
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Loving Carmen was a lot of things. 
It was the smoulder of colours brushed onto a canvas, it was the crash of waves in the middle of the pacific, fighting and thrashing against each other until it took you under and below. It was the spoonful of honey that eased the bitterness, it was beyond your control. A love so smouldering and bright that you didn't quite know if your heart could fit it all.
But it was also difficult, like dragging a 50 pound steel anchor every way you went. You were forever grateful to have Carmen in your life, again at least, but it wasn’t exactly like the things that he had struggled with before he wasn't struggling with even more now. 
You were patient, you tried to be at least. When he wouldn’t pick up your calls for hours, when he was so caught up with work he forgot to eat, when he was so caught up with work all the last of his energy was spent on you and not himself.
You loved Carmen too hard to let him destroy himself for his work, even if he hated you for it, you couldn't watch him crumble and break from the stress of the restaurant and the overwhelming pressure he put on himself. 
Especially when you saw him begin to unravel before you, melting hot wax crackling and setting form. He had begun to throw back bottles of pepto like it was water, crunching on tums like popcorn any chance he got, and it wasn't like the restaurant was doing bad, in fact it was doing amazing. Yet, it was that fact alone that made Carmen get worse, made him slip into the sinking black hole that told him one moment away from the shop, one glance off of his work and it would crumble into ash.
You had seen this in New York, where he would call you during the depths of the night, the sound of his stuttered sobs breaking any resolve you had left. You had raced to throw on a jacket and bring a pot of soup to his place even when he protested. You fed him whilst he shook against you, you whispered stories until he fell asleep, you kissed his curls.
You wondered if he knew.
You find yourself doing the same thing now, like an endless dance you both are bound to, every rational part of you wants to hate it but you can't deny the way your heart shimmers in want. Your mind moves with the familiarity of it, chasing after him like a game of cat and mouse.
Only this time you live with Carmen and not in a dingy shoebox in New York holding back every ounce of love you wanted to pour into him. 
Carmen’s mind was forever connected to food, it was something so automatic it fell unconscious under his skin. You found amusement in the way he’d stand in the middle of your apartment living room in quick critic over the late night cooking shows that you would turn on whilst waiting for him to come home, or the coffee around the corner he swears isn’t actual beans. 
But your soup, and anything else you made was something he had always reserved with a certain adoration. He’d whisper into the anonymity of your neck under the covers, recounting how your food was akin to a warm hug, coming home to the smell of cookies and a house of laughter and light he wished he had growing up.  
You hoped he had actually eaten something today, but it was that belief that evaded your mind as quickly as it came when you reminded yourself who Carmen was. It was push and pull, and you would be damned if he didn't finish your food and then some.
Your job allowed you to work from home, and you don’t know if it was your laziness or intelligence that enabled you to make it so that you only had to work a couple hours in the day. It was sometimes strange to Carmen, how you could be able to find love and creation in something without putting everything into it.
Carmen was always watching you, he found peace in it, the moves and motions of you all over the apartment, the scent of your body wash, you toothbrush next to his, you were a movie right in front of him and he would watch you for eternity if he could.
You turn into the back of the Bear, parking between the faded white lines before turning off the engine and staying in the car for a moment. You hated the cold, and your breath had already begun to blow out misty clouds every time you exhaled. Collecting the warm container of soup and a sandwich you quickly jog towards the restaurant, taking the back door when you notice Manny leaving.
“Hey Hun, how ya doing” Manny nods towards you with a warm smile
“Hey Manny, just coming to get Carmen to eat something other than tums” 
“Chef is definitely wound tight, mix up on a new delivery of some kind of fruit? Forgot the name.. It's spiky and smells like when we moved out those ovens and found those burnt onions and stock stuck to the floor” Manny replies with a wince as you both recall the devastating smell that hadn’t left your nostrils in weeks during the renovation.
“Uh, Durian?” You reply and Manny clicks his fingers at your reply.
“That's it. That mind of yours is really something. He hasn’t taken a break since the morning, but you always have a way with him” Manny raises his eyebrows and you shake your head with a laugh
You only remember that particular fruit because Carmen had been obsessing over a new menu item that included it as its main component. He had spent sleepless nights perfecting it, despite it being utterly magnificent the first try. You couldn’t shake him from his work, it could consume him for months if he let it, and you feared he was at the precipice of falling into that hole once again.
You walk through the back hallway leading up to the main kitchen, passing by the tired hunches of the shoulder dressed down in crisp white shirts and aprons. The Bear had a late start today, Sydney suggested opening a little later for a full dinner menu rather than lunch as well and the turn out had shocked you all.
It also meant Carmen came home even later than he already did during those nights, you’ve had to damn near carry him to the bath to get him to not drop dead the second he came home. You didn’t mind however, you couldn't deny the faint thrum of your heart content as you washed Carmen’s hair whilst he lay against you half asleep. 
You spot Sydney at her station, and you quickly walk over to see her prepping for dinner, the swoop of her knife cutting into red meat in a kind of curve you knew she had perfected over the years.
“Hey Syd, early start?” You say, once your side by side with her
“Oh don’t remind me, can you believe the L got backed up from all the ice last night? Added a whole 45 minutes to my commute” Sydney groans out, shaking her head as she turns to you. Grateful to have a reprieve from her repetitive cutting.
“Goddam Chicago, if it makes you feel any better, I’ve got a bottle of wine with your name on it in my fridge and it is dying to be opened and shared by two very, very tired women” You reply, smiling at the way Sydney raises her eyebrows gleefully at the thought.
“I am holding you to that, as soon as we get through today. God, this new dish Carmen has thought up is kicking my ass” Sydney replies, and your ears chirp at the mention of the man you’ve been looking for.
“Speaking of Carmen, have you seen him?” 
“Yeah, I think he’s still in the office, been on call with one of our vendors cause of the mix up with the--”
“Durian, yeah. Thanks Syd” You reply, giving her a nod before making your way to the hallway leading into the office.
You hear Carmen before you see him, the sound of his loud voice seeping through the cracks of the door. His voice rises as he gets more and more agitated, and you don’t miss the sound of a cup being thrown against the wall as the phone call continues, not waiting a moment before firing back muffled words you can hardly make out except
“Unprofessional” “waste of my time” “fuckin’ dick”
So yeah, you thought it was definitely a good time to walk in and get your extremely agitated boyfriend to eat your soup.
Just as you walk through the door, you see Carmen slam the phone back onto the receiver, shouting out obscenities at the object as he throws his chair back onto the floor. Years working together has made you unfazed by his outbursts of anger, though you have been sly in trying to get him to go to therapy so that he doesn't get an aneurysm over the phone with the Wifi company or something hilariously trivial.
“Hey Carm” You say, whilst closing the door, and Carmen look up at you in surprise, his features sobering, as his eyes relax into a comforting gaze.
“Ah shit, sorry bout that, just some stubborn, pig headed vendors who don’t want to fix a problem they fucking caused” Carmen replies, his chest rising rapidly as he takes sharp inhales of oxygen. 
He turns to face you and you take in the sunken look of his cheeks, the skin a little discoloured like he was sick, and his hair dishevelled and falling flat against his face like he's run his hand through it too many times.
“Jesus Carmen, have you gotten any sleep?” You reply, instantly as you make your way over to him, pressing a hand on his shoulder.
Carmen shudders against your touch, shaking his head as he leans back and away from you. You stumble as you look down at your hand now inches away from his shoulder in confusion. Carmen never turned you away from him, in fact during those unforgiving times of anxiety and anguish, when he felt the entire sky falling, you would be his anchor to bring him back.
The fact that he had visibly shuddered when you touched him made your heart ache, and it hurts even more when Carmen notices, the guilt spilling into him.
“Just been so busy” Carmen replies, his eyes darting everywhere but you, as you nod with a tight smile, backing away from him.
You reach for the soup you've left on the edge, placing it on the desk and you nod to it
“Have you eaten today?” You reply and Carmen stops watching you, blinking slowly as he tries to remember the last time he's actually consumed something, before coming up empty and shaking his head up at you with a groan.
“I thought so, you need to eat Carmen, how can you expect to function let alone run a restaurant if you aren't at your optimal level” You reason, leaning against the table, with your arms crossed against your chest.
“It’s fine, I was just gonna grab something small” Carmen waves you off
“Actually, I brought you food right now so I think it would be a perfect time-
“Is that why you came? To micromanage me like some toddler” Carmen suddenly replies, his eyes narrowing as he looks at you through half lidded eyes.
“I- what? I didn’t-”
“I can run my restaurant blindfolded with my arms tied behind my back, alright? I don’t need you to come and patronise me like you know every goddamn thing” Carmen spits out, and you can't help the way your blood runs hot, the rhythmic beat of anger pounding through you like a hammer.
How fucking dare he
“Excuse me? I came here for you Carmen, not some self-righteous moment to say I'm better than you. God damnit, is that what you think? I came here to make sure you didn't faint and fall into a pot of boiling hot water” You spit out, Carmen looks up at you, hes blues swimming in ire as he lets a humour-less laugh rumble through his chest.
You felt all the things you had kept a lid on begin to tumble out of your mouth, and soon you’re anger morphed into a building current. The flashes of everything that had gone wrong, the lack of communication, the coming home late, it all has begun to accumulate rapidly and you let it consume you in its entirety. 
“Sure, of course,” Carmen sings. “I’m not your fucking child alright? You are my goddamn mother so stop treating me like you need to make sure I eat 3 times a day and have my nightly bath. I’m a grown man-”
“Then ACT LIKE IT!”
Carmen looks up at you in surprise, his brows knitting as his head swivels back from your outburst. You had never screamed at him, in fact, Carmen can’t remember a time where you had screamed at anyone like you did now as you stare him down deviantly. Eyes burning with a fiery anger that begged to be stoked. Carmen knows this, your hands shake in tight fists like your seconds away from swiping him, and he resorts back to his usual self destruction of turning back and running away. 
“Yeah, yeah that's right, walk away, walk away like you always do. Carmen, soon enough you're going to have to face it you know? You’re gonna have to face your fucking issues before it destroys us both” You scream, and Carmen pauses, causing you to stumble. Carmen turns around to face you in the middle of the hallway, the rush of anger present on his cheeks, causing the veins to bulge out on his neck and he looms over you
“Issues, I have fucking issues? You’re screaming at me because of goddamn soup”
“It’s more than fucking SOUP!” The screech of your voice bounced across the thin walls of the restaurant hallway, your throat begins to burn as you begin to swallow down the emotion bubbling within you. You want to reach into him and rattle his neck, force him to see the destructive path he was taking, force him to do anything but turn away and shut you out.
A quiet trepidation falls over the entire kitchen as they watch you both fight, it was unheard of, an anomaly that seemed wrong, like someone had gotten a couple from the street and put your faces on it.
Watching you both fight was like watching a performance. The way you both leaned into each other menacingly, neither of you backing down, there was an indefinite energy that bubbled between you both, you were seconds away from shocking each other or making out. 
“What is it then huh? Why are you acting like this? You expect me to read your goddamn mind? You’ve changed alright? Everyone can see it, I can't even recognise the person in front of me half the time” Carmen sneers, his neck turning a crimson red as he clenches his jaw painfully. He’s holding himself back, his body shakes with it, the tight clenches of his fist stopping him from putting a hole in the wall or smashing a chair.
“I’ve changed? Me?” You cut yourself off with a chuckle, Carmen shifted his gaze as his eyebrows knot in confusion, and when you catch a glimpse of his face you can’t help the booming sound from crawling up your throat, keening over as the sick sound of laughter rocks through your body.
The rest of the team now watches on in horror, you were laughing, why are you fucking laughing?
You try and gulp down the uncontrollable fit of laughter, you can practically feel your body shift down into the jagged memories from all those years ago. From a place and time you had shuffled into a no named cabinet and thrown into the deepest depths of the ocean. 
You didn’t want to remember, you begged your mind to forget, but as your laughter slips into sharp inhales, you already can taste the wetness streaming down your cheeks, and slithering down the slope of your neck.
Your sob’s rack through you, winding you until you hunched over, reaching out onto the wall to steady yourself and trying to find footing as the ground caves beneath you.
Carmen recognises it in an instant, taking a tentative step forward, raising his arms before dropping them in a second, like he was approaching a volatile animal.
“Fuck, I’m sorry I-” Carmen starts, but you’ve already raised yourself from your hunched position, the tears dripping into the linoleum floors and splashing onto your combat boots.
You didn’t want to face that time in your life again, but Carmen has practically forced you too, and there's no way in hell you weren’t going to drag him down into that bordered off well. Fuck being the bigger person.
“No no, you spoke, this is my fucking turn now” You grunt out, the rippling grief leaving your body in a flash as you sneer over him.
Carmen gulps back a retort, his mind re-circuiting, trying to figure out your polar behaviour. Carmen knew better to interrupt you now, in fact the restaurants was a pin drop quiet, safe for the whooshing sound of the central air corn, and the sound of Carmen's stuttering inhales.
“YOU listen to me” You spit, pointing a finger, pressing it into Carmen's chest so hard he stumbles back
“You fucking left me Carmen. You! You- just, you dropped everything we had, everything we ever built in New York and you disappeared. And it was Mickey, and you needed to be there and I got that, I get that, but you- you just left me there.” You grunt, biting back the swell of emotion that erupted when you thought about those years ago. 
“You became a ghost, and god,- you could have told me, after everything I thought we had- you could've told me! But then you didn't. And I was left to pick up the pieces, wondering if you had ever loved me, wondering if I should have given half of myself to you whilst you couldn't even call me back” You stutter out, shocking back the onslaught of tears as you swallow around the lump in your throat.
Carmen’s face pales as he registers those years ago in New York, the immediate look of guilt and anguish twisting his features as he leans onto the wall for support.
Even after all these years, all this time, you still felt it like it was yesterday. All your work had become undone, the thin veil of healing had been stripped back to bare bones in an instant, and you hate it, you hate it so much. Why couldn’t you have packed up and moved on? Why did you have to fold back into yourself at those memories? You don't know what you're seeking now, vengeance, restitution, it all becomes blurred in the heat of it, and god have you wanted to strip your skin and wake up restored since that night.
“You ruined me for a year Carmen. I was a shell of myself because of you. And then you called me that afternoon and you know what? I wanted to throw my phone into the fucking Hudson. I wanted to rip my hair out and scream and hurt you like you hurt me because the truth was I already forgiven you before you even apologised. And you never did. And I still wanted to come back to Chicago for you.” 
“Honey-” Carmen's strained voice shudders at your words, and you can make out the red of his eyelids, the tears collecting at his lids.
You hold up a hand, stopping Carmen from speaking, tears begin to form at your waterline, threatening to break, your vision blurs, the features of Carmen’s tormented face becoming wobbly and undefined. 
You were so sick of crying, you were so sick of it.
“And I won’t ever make you keep paying for a mistake for the rest of your life, I let go of that anger because you needed my help and in some way, I fell in love with you all over again, I was able to make peace with it.” 
“But you don't think I know you Carmen? When you overwork yourself to death you can barely eat? When you get bad again at calling me? When you were good, you were the best person in my entire world, but when you're like this?” You shake your head into the empty space between you, hands waving in front of you. 
Carmen looks torn apart, his hair falling flat against his forehead, his hands in tight fists as he shakes his head against your words. Begging, on his knees, begging for you to stop, to stop saying those things that came from your mouth that were not true. His body shakes with it, the gushing feeling of guilt, it washes over him in waves.
His mind is going a mile a minute, every thought of work, of that mismatched order he had to deal with, of the vendor who refused to deliver, it all went out the window the second your face contorted in that heart aching way. He can't lose you, every fiber in his being yearned for you, he lived for you. And here he was losing you, like a brush of paint across a canvas.
You were slipping from him every second you stood there with tears dripping down your cheeks like a stream.
“You’re the one that's changed. You're the one who's always changing. Don’t throw it back at me just because you can’t see it” You mutter with a shake of your head. Your voice carries a finality with it, and you jerk from Carmen when he takes a step towards you. You can't breathe in here, and you pass by the concerned gases of the rest of the Bear, shaking your head and moving away from Sydney, before dipping back into the busy streets of Chicago. You bite your tongue the entire way until the taste of copper fills your mouth.
Folding yourself into the huddled waves of mundanity, leaving your soup and the last bit of your aching heart on the bench of Carmen's office.
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Text
"What's up, Supes?"
The hero froze. The file was basically glued to their hand. They looked up, only to find the villain lean against the doorway. They wiggled with their eyebrows, a smug grin on their face and admittedly, the hero had to swallow.
"Hi."
"Whatcha up to?"
"Just, you know...cleaning."
"Cleaning?"
"Yup."
The villain shook their head and clicked with their tongue, clearly not buying any of the hero's lies. It had been a perfect plan. Up until now. The hero cursed under their breath.
"How long has it been? Three months?" the villain asked. They pushed themselves off the doorframe and approached the hero with slow, careful steps.
"Three and a half, if you want to be nitpicky," the hero said. They didn't know what to do with the file in their hands, let alone with themselves.
"Mhmm. So, we haven't seen each other in three and a half months and now you're at my party. In my office. Cleaning."
"You got it." The hero made very awkward finger guns and winked, as if that could come close to saving them.
"Did you really think I wouldn't notice you?" the villain asked. They laughed softly. "That I wouldn't recognise you?"
The hero shrugged lazily. They were so fucked.
"Ahh, come on. It's not like you weren't hoping for this to happen, huh?" They leaned over the table, one hand on it, the other hiding the file behind their back. "Isn't destiny such a funny little thing?"
"Well, I was hoping to see you again. I didn't want you to steal from me, though." The villain stopped at the other side of the table and leaned forward, almost like the hero. "The file, Supes."
"I don't really like that nickname."
"Superhero. Supes. You'll manage." The villain offered their hand, expecting the hero to give them the file. "I can also call you Darling if you want me to."
Suddenly, the hero's nervousness turned into embarrassment.
"I was on sabbatical."
"Bullshit."
"I was busy...missing you?" the hero tried and at least that worked a little. The villain crossed their arms in front of their chest, raising an eyebrow.
"Go on."
"Oh, you know, I was really busy with superhero stuff. Saving people, arresting villains...and all of that just made me think of you and well, here I am!" They smiled brightly to make an attempt to trick the villain but both of them knew it was a rather sad try. "Surprise!"
"You're adorable." The villain walked around the table and the hero didn't dare to move. "Just tell me you were busy with...I don't know, a certain project I am not supposed to know about?"
Uh-oh.
"Whaat? You're crazy."
"A certain mission?"
The hero panicked. No one was supposed to know about this, least of all the villain. So, there wasn't exactly a solution except for impulsive decisions. The hero didn't always perform perfectly under pressure. Without really thinking, they grabbed the villain and kissed them hard. As a response, the villain hummed quietly. Caught off guard but definitely satisfied. The hero found it quite adorable.
They didn't really know what they were doing. The last time they had kissed anyone was for some publicity a few months ago. But this was different. They could feel their heart rage in their chest, as if they were going to explode any second now. Although they were quite experienced, they couldn't remember this ever happening.
Surprisingly, the villain not only kissed them back, but also pulled them a little closer.
For a moment, the hero lost themselves in the intimacy but then, they pulled out the handcuffs. With a click, they cuffed the villain to their own computer.
"You're evil," the villain whispered against their lips. The hero's hands were shaking. They had never kissed anyone like this. It had never felt like this before. They didn't want to think about the implications.
"I'm your Supes," the hero said. With the villain cuffed, they felt a little more confident. "Don't steal files just because you want to see me."
"Says you."
"This is really important and you should not put your nose into someone else's business."
"Again, rich coming from you," the villain said. They scrunched their nose. "Let me guess, this is too dangerous?"
"Exactly," the hero whispered. "I'll...I'll see you once this is all over."
They took one last look at the villain before they walked out of the office.
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f1girliefics · 7 months
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Twisted Anger
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Daniel Ricciardo x Reader
Summary: A silly argument and a friend's wedding can only end well.
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You weren't even sure anymore what the argument was about.
Was it his busy schedule? Was it your jealousy because he was constantly surrounded by babes? Was it the fact that he never cleaned up in the kitchen after himself?
You weren't sure anymore.
But you were angry.
Even as you stood by your best friend at the altar. Even as you felt his gaze burning into the back of your head.
You needed to focus.
This wasn't your time. 
It was hers.
Her dress was perfect, and you made sure the groom wouldn't run off.
You busied yourself all morning with the wedding just so your thoughts wouldn't fill with Daniel.
It was difficult, because every quiet moment, your mind wandered.
Not only to the argument, but just him.
The years you two spent together, it felt silly to let all that go just because of some unwashed dishes.
But all he had to do was put them into the dishwasher.
Silly argument, which made you storm out of your apartment and made you pretend you didn't know him as he sat on the bench of the church while you stood in the front.
You recognized how silly it was.
But you also couldn't help it.
All things came crashing down on you. He was under a lot of pressure to prove himself with his new team, he didn't need your nagging.
It hasn't even been a day, yet you felt bad and angry still. You missed him when you turned and took a glance at his face, you just wanted to smack him. 
It was difficult. 
But you knew you loved him more than an argument.
You will talk with him, but for now, you focused on being there for your friend for her big day.
At least it kept you occupied.
---
Perhaps your third shot wasn't the best idea. But you felt like you needed it.
Daniel was sitting beside you all night and you swore you could cut the tension with a butter knife.
You tried your best to ignore it, for your friend. 
But now you felt lightheaded, you needed fresh air. The music also didn't help, so, you excused yourself from the table.
You walked a bit further from the venue. You found a bench and sat down.
You took deep breaths and closed your eyes.
You felt the alcohol running through you.
As you opened your eyes you saw Daniel standing close to you.
"Are you okay?" he asked. 
"Yeah. No."
"You must be drunk, I saw how much you had."
"I'm about to be." 
"Before you do... can we talk? You avoided me all day."
"This is my best friend's wedding. She doesn't need my drama today."
Silence.
He didn't know what to say, and you started to really feel the alcohol, which made it extremely difficult to not say a thing.
"You know... I'm not even sure why we argued yesterday." you confessed as you looked at your high heels, your feet hurt, but your heart hurt more.
"You were right, I should help around the house more." he sat down next to you.
"Nah. You do all the... famous person shit. You are a 'high performance athlete' I should be able to handle a couple of unwashed plates. BUT we have a dishwasher for a reason. At least put them in there... please."
You saw him nod his head when you stood up.
You took two steps when you collapsed and let out a hiss.
You held your ankle.
"Oh shit, Babe are you okay?! Don't move it, let me see."
You watched him as he carefully looked at your ankle. You kept staring and now, you couldn't blame the alcohol.
You loved him.
You loved him so much.
As he slowly moved your shoe off your foot, he was so gentle. It made you smile.
"Does this hurt?" he asked but you didn't hear him. You were too busy looking at his gorgeous face.
When you didn't reply he looked at your face, and seeing that you were smiling he let out a huff.
"I was worried and you are not even hurt."
Yeah, you might have faked it for his reaction, but it was worth it.
"You look sexy when you are worried." you said as you moved and grabbed him by the back of his neck, pulling him in for a kiss.
You knew you couldn't promise that you wouldn't argue anymore, it was unrealistic.
But you knew you would always kiss and make up.
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!DO NOT TRANSLATE, REPOST OR PLAGIRISE MY WORK!
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