#why did i think pain? 🤔
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#weird how when im ignoring the pain my brain or body feel and im tryinf to read or experience the world#and suddenly all words or emotions or things in life just become: pain#and i have yo bacj track and double check every 5 seconds like what that didn't say/mean pain#i mase that up#wtf where did that come from?#why did i think pain? 🤔#oh yeah bc i'm in pretty bad pain rn huh go figure#bye im gonna go suffer at work now whelp#ignore me#my uterus is trying to kill me again
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Do you have any thoughts on yandere SDV Harvey?🤔
i sure do!!!! i think i got a little carried away 😭😭😭 i hope i delivered!
Yandere Harvey Relationship Headcanons
Gender neutral, no use of Y/N, munchausen syndrome by proxy, implied murder, implied NSFW, Harvey's a little weird about bodily fluids and food, long post ahead!
┊͙✧˖*°࿐
How the relationship started...
Let's say, he knows you outside of his work, and somehow, you're the one person in Stardew Valley who has never entered his clinic before. Honestly, you'd have drawn his attention right then and there because of your strange imperviousness to harm or disease.
Like... You? That farmer who goes down into the mines every other day to fight monsters has never been injured? You, who works day and night to the point of exhaustion has never gotten sick and required medical assistance?
The fact that you weren't one of his patients would worry him to his bones.
Even if you weren't one of his patients, he'd have befriended you outside of work. Perhaps at the saloon, after hours, and one of the very rare times he's seen you relax.
He notices the slight limp as you enter, different from your usual gait. When he asks, you chalk it up to a rock in your boot. Harvey sends you a disapproving stare and a furrowed mustache, and you loosen up.
You tell him you tripped while running away from a slime in the mines. And that you maybe pulled something while running. And maybe you lifted something wrong yesterday and hurt your back. And-
Harvey takes off his glasses to rub at the space between his eyebrows, stressed.
"And not once did you think to come visit me?"
"Thought it would go away if I just slept and drank enough water."
His gaze softens.
"..I really do advise it. Please."
Your fingers play with your glass. He can see a bruise forming on the side of your wrist, and the cuts and calluses on your skin.
"...I'll do it tomorrow."
He sighs slightly.
"Well, since I can't do anything for you right now, I'll at least buy you a drink."
"You can do that?"
"Hey, it numbs the pain. Painkiller." He jokes, and you laugh and shake your head. He realizes he likes the sound of your laugh.
"But- wait, don't take that as real medical advice. Really. Please."
That pulls another laugh out of you, louder, and pink warms his cheeks as he laughs heartily alongside you.
The next evening, Harvey waited all day for you to come in. It was nearing closing hours, and he was worried you had disregarded his advice, but right as he got up to start closing the clinic, the door opens, and there you are, leaves in your hair and your muddy shoes leaving a track on his tiles.
He's elated, he knows he shouldn't be, considering why you're even here, but he's so glad you listened to him, so glad you're here. He looks noticeably flustered, his hair is slightly out of place, his glasses are sliding down his nose, and his tie is loose.
"O-Oh, hey there. You finally came in."
"Were you waiting for me? I apologize. It looked like you were about to close up."
He waves your worries away with a dismissive hand, "Ah, what's one more patient? Come on, you look like you really need my help, anyways."
You follow him into a room, cringing at the muddy mess you leave on the floor.
"Sorry for that- I can clean up after we're done."
Harvey insistently shakes his head, sighing your name, "No, no, can't have you doing that, not in the condition you're in." He motions over to the bed, you sit on the edge of it.
"Besides, I haven't even started my assessment of you yet, but I already know you're gonna need a few days of rest at least. Doctor's orders."
He smiles softly at your annoyed expression, donning his stethoscope as you straighten your posture slightly, readying for him to place the other end of the apparatus on you.
"...See, you've got an abnormal heart rate for someone who is at rest."
He notes the warmth of your skin under his palm, resting against your back.
"Have you been feeling ill recently? Runny nose, coughing, headaches, anything of the sort?"
"U-Uh, no." You shake your head, playing with the fabric of your trousers. Nervous.
"...You seem rather flustered. Any reason?"
Your eyes glance up at his, he cocks his head, and you immediately look back down to your feet.
"...Nah."
Harvey smiles, knowingly, and the rest of the appointment continues as normal.
Expectations...
Following this, he'd be more obvious in his attempts to court you. His courting attempts would feel rather old-fashioned, but I think there's a lot of heart in them. I feel like Harvey would be a little bit of a sucker for romantic things, so you'd definitely be receiving letters, all from a secret admirer, of course.
He is confident that he likes you, but he'd carry a lot of anxiety about being so upfront about it, and that perhaps you wouldn't feel the same way.
The letters he sends you would be brief yet sweet. Short messages to pick you up for the day, just wanting to be a part of your life.
"If you ever feel like all the work you do isn't appreciated, know that I am always here, and I always do. You are doing great."
You'd tell him about the letters you've been receiving, during one of your evenings together at the bar. It'd make him blush. Oh, his letters were so important to you that you had to gush about them to a friend?
"And... What do you think of them? The letters?" His eyes are slightly wider than they should be, but the reflections on his glasses hide his faintly, much-too focused expression.
You shy from his eye contact, "...I think they're really sweet. But honestly, I wish they'd just... say it to me directly instead of hiding like this. I want to communicate, talk to them, y'know? Have a conversation, and stuff.."
Harvey blinks, wets his lips.
"What do you think you'd do if he-" He clears his throat, "-they did?"
You frown a little, mulling over the thought for a bit.
"...I'd go on a few dates with them, see if things work out."
His exhale is shaky, he takes a sip of his whiskey.
"Who do you think it is?"
You meet his gaze. His eyes are warm, his cheeks are red too, but that might be the alcohol... Though you realize he's not the type to get flushed when drunk.
"...Is it you?"
His fingers around his glass tremble, and his bottom lip quivers.
"I.. w-well..." He pushes his glasses up, nervously running a hand through his hair. You giggle, and he relaxes.
"Yeah." He smiles warmly.
"Yeah?" You chirp out a laugh again, "I figured."
Although Harvey was usually one who didn't have any problem holding eye-contact at all, now he found himself unable to look at you for too long without getting giddy like a schoolgirl and having to look away to save his racing heart.
That night, you two would be declared a couple. He teased you, wondering where that "first few dates then we'll see how it works out" phase went. You said it was different if it was him, and he had to hide his face in his hands to conceal his boyish, cheesy grin.
His first show of affection would be the next morning, when he brought you a bouquet of flowers to your doorstep, but upon arrival, seeing your expansive field of vegetation, he realized it was perhaps a bit stupid to gift flowers to someone who grows them.
Nonetheless, you accepted them from an embarrassed Harvey gratefully, saying you've wanted to try growing these for a while. Lo and behold, the next time he shows up, with a more thought-out gift this time, he sees a few new flower pots on your front porch.
Harvey as your boyfriend is strangely rather maternal. He tends to be quite the worrywart, always fussing over any cuts or bruises you may get while going about your day, making sure you eat and get enough rest, and always making sure you're dressed properly.
Oh, the different kind of monster Harvey turns into during the winter LOL. He will stay posted by your door, making sure you don't step a foot outside without a thick coat or gloves.
He does enjoy more than he likes to admit, though, when you still feel cold and he has to give you his coat or his scarf. It makes him all smiley and he thinks you look adorable in his clothing.
I think, his deepest desire, is for you to always stay safe, and that he is the one to provide that safety. I mean, with him being a doctor, he is the only person qualified to look after you anyways, but he still does get jealous.
He gets really upset when he's out of the clinic for a bit, and finds out that Maru was the one who tended to your wounds instead of him.
He gets more jealous when you tell him about the work you did that day, and another person was with you.
What do you mean you spent the evening fishing while conversing with Elliott? That could've been him...
What do you mean you spent the afternoon in the library with Penny? Wha- Gunther winked at you!?
Harvey really does want to spend more time with you, but he has a duty to attend to.
Unless...
Punishments...
Maybe, one day, Harvey will stop worrying so much over your health. He'll let you do your thing as you please, though it would hurt him to see you going about your day so haphazardly. But he'll hold back on his usual worried malewife nagging, and just let you do you.
One day, your dangerous lifestyle will catch up on you, and maybe you'll catch a cold, or you'll break a bone. Harvey will be there immediately, much too prepared.
Even though this is what he wanted from this plan, he still cries. He hates seeing you so beat-up, but he couldn't think of any other way to always be by your side. At least the tears blow away any suspicion of his part in this.
It could be a tiny fracture, but he'll still insist you'd need a cast, and that you'd need a wheelchair for the first few weeks. And, of course, Harvey's there to coddle you and help you around.
Maru says she can look after you while Harvey runs the clinic, but he gets uncharacteristically hostile at the mere suggestion of this. If Maru were to keep prying, if she were to find out that your injuries aren't as bad as he says they are, then Harvey might have to resort to more drastic measures.
Murder would be a very difficult thing for Harvey to do, but when he thinks about the life you two have right now- having you rely on him for everything, taking care of you everyday, spending every single moment with each other- his heart feels like it could fall out of his chest at the thought of anyone taking that away from you two.
His access to such a wide array of chemicals and medicines would be terrifying. If anyone threatens this peaceful, perfect life between you two, he could simply inject them with a certain concoction during their routine check-ups, say they needed it, that it was medicine, and it wouldn't even show in an autopsy.
Unfortunately, his tampering with human life extends to you.
Harvey, I think, would get much too enamored by this life you two have made since you've gotten injured.
Being able to dote on you with no restraint, being by your side for every single moment, it was all he could ever dream of.
But all good things come to an end, and your fractured bone would start to heal.
He never thought he'd be capable of lying, not sure if he'd ever done it before, but it's a newfound talent to him. Worries him how good he is at it.
He tells you you need to keep that cast on. That even if you're allowed to use crutches now instead of a wheelchair, that you still need his assistance. He insists that you need him.
Any sort of push-back from you would have his heart pounding. No, no, you can't get up and go back to work. You can't be doing chores on your own, he'll do that- You cannot leave.
Munchausen syndrome by proxy from an actual doctor would be a horrifying thing to go through. Not just any other doctor either, but Harvey, a man who seems so gentle and kind-hearted, a man who is supposed to be your partner.
Sad to say, but I don't think you'd have any way out of this. Your best course of action would be to just let him take care of you as much as he pleases. In due time, he would want to see you get better, so you'll be back to having your freedom in a few months, maybe...
Rewards...
It is pretty comedic saying this after that punishments portion, but Harvey, on more normal days, really is a passive man. He doesn't really have any strange obsessive habits, though he's probably a little weird about fluids...
By that, I mean he'd probably slip a little bit of his saliva or semen into his cooking. He gets a really euphoric rush when he sees you eating that tainted food he made for you. He enjoys that idea that a part of him is mingled in your body now. The other way around goes, too.
When you're sleeping, sometimes you drool, did you know that? You probably don't, because Harvey always wipes it off and licks it. It gives him shivers whenever he does, makes him way more excited than it should.
His libido is not the highest, but that's because I think he makes an active effort to suppress himself. Wants to be good for you. Harvey does have these dirty thoughts pretty often, but he usually just excuses himself to the bathroom for a second to relieve himself when it gets too unbearable. Even then, he dislikes this, since he feels like it'd be a waste of his release, since it's not inside you.
Every day would feel very domestic, he'd tease that you two already act like an old married couple, but he'd secretly hope you'd catch on to the idea he's putting down.
Harvey really does want to get married to you. He honestly, strangely, would act a lot more normally if you two were to be wed. It's like, there is something that exists that ties you two together, so even if you two aren't always by each other's side, he at least finds some comfort in knowing you two are bound forever.
Let's just, uh, hope you don't divorce him... Honestly, at this point, he may have already taken care of Mayor Lewis, so that option won't even be open to you anymore.
Harvey would probably try to pop the question during a little picnic he prepared for the two of you. The box for your engagement ring hidden in the picnic basket, amongst carefully wrapped sandwiches and lunchboxes.
You would pick it up while looking through the basket, wondering what it was. You open it, and Harvey feels like he could faint from how fast his heart is beating.
He stutters a lot, being unable to look you in the eye, then you rest a hand on his shoulder, and he feels alright again.
"I... I'd really like to get married with you, my love. Whaddya say?"
You smile at him, you say yes, and Harvey literally shouts in joy, before roughly taking you in his arms.
He quickly apologizes for being so erratic, but he swears he's never been happier. He just loves you so much.
Even though you two were only fiancés at this point, he'd call you his husband/wife/spouse from time to time, just a slip of the tongue, but he does get shy about it.
Your life together would be relatively the same now, just with some more added affection.
He'd get more comfortable around you, kissing you more often, getting more touchy, wearing less clothing around the house.
Of course, his main core value is still there; to care for you.
When thinking of Harvey's love language, you would, rationally, expect it to be acts of service. However, I posit this; his love language would be allowing himself to be taken care of.
He does get tired, and you do notice. You try to do his chores, try to take care of yourself so he'd have some time to relax, but he always gets fussy about it.
He insists that he can still do it, that he can still do things for you. Perhaps, he's scared that if he's unable to please you, that you'll go elsewhere, fall out of love with him.
You can sense that fear, and you tell him you'll still be here. You tell him to go lie down and rest, and you'll join him when you've finished cleaning up.
The wrinkles on his forehead soften up, so does his gaze, and he nods.
"I... Alright, sweetheart. I'll be waiting. Don't take too long, okay?"
┊͙✧˖*°࿐
#stardew valley#sdv#yandere stardew valley#yandere sdv#yandere harvey#yandere harvey sdv#harvey sdv#sdv harvey#stardew valley harvey#harvey stardew valley#yandere sdv x reader#yandere harvey x reader#yandere x reader#harvey x reader#sdv harvey x reader#yandere male x reader#yandere male#🛁#stardew valley bachelors#sdv bachelors#sdv bachelors x reader#yandere sdv bachelors
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kenma fatherly headcannons
i thought it would be interesting to think about what kenma would be like as a father 🤔
look, im not even gonna be nice with it, i definitely dont see kenma being excited at the idea of having a kid 😭
definitely was like "are you being fr 😟?" when you told him
he obviously wasnt an asshole about it, but he couldn't help his feeling and indifference about the whole thing
the two of you had a long talk about it
the whole time he was more or less "are you sure about this"
hes not a horrible person/partner, he wasnt about to force you to do an abortion
he just wanted to make sure this was actually what you wanted to do and if you were actually serious about it
after you were stern about keeping the baby, he was fine with it
he was more worried about how he would be like as a father because he's very much scared of little kids and struggles to bond with just anyone
also a little peeved at the thought of his alone/free time being taken away
doesnt like the idea of his alone time with you having a literal permanent third wheeler but wont admit that to anyone but kuroo 🌚
during ur pregnancy, he was actually really okay with it
he would check up on you various times of the day, asking how you feel
yeah, he wasnt really excited for it, but that doesn't mean he wont try for it
would pause his games and go to wherever part of the house you were in, eyeing your baby bump with those wary cat eyes of his, all "..how are you feeling..?"
tbh i see you getting pregnant before marrying him because the two of you were kinda lazy with being careful 😅
he kinda facepalms because now hes like "why didnt i think of the possibility of pregnancy🤦🏽♀️"
while it doesn't speed up the whole process, he'll now begin taking the thought of marriage seriously
he'll bring up the idea of eloping, or a small wedding because he doesn't like the idea of a big and elaborate wedding ceremony/party
he didnt really care about gender, but he did care about baby names because he didnt want the baby to have a stupid name
now i see him being very curious tho
so he'll ask you a bunch of questions about how it feels to be pregnant, eyes wide when you tell him all the gruesome parts 😭
will also spend some time looking up more information about pregnancy and childbirth
now i do think he'd be aware about how he should change himself for the better
he grew up kinda isolated, and he 100% didnt want that for his kid, especially considering the fact that his child will most likely be an only child too
aw sleeping in kenma's arms while he plays video games cuz hormones made you sad
he'll like announce ur pregnancy to his followers/fans, it was so random he was like "yeah guys im having a kid 😪 kinda scary ngl" during one of his livestreams
really appreciates and is totally surprised when he's gifted money and baby supplies by his fans
maybe posts short little clips of you sleeping in an odd position or doing random things because he thinks its funny how you now do things differently because your bump prevents you from doing things in a certain way
i think it would interest him in the way your baby bump grows
he would be a little mortified at the way he would poke your bump's skin and watch his indent stay there long after he pulled his finger away
would be kinda "??? 🤔🤨" when he first feels the baby's kick/movements
he would "begrudgingly" walk to the store for you late at night if you were craving something
acts all annoyed but lets bffr kenma we know ur a softie 🤣
okay for the birth tho he's so mortified
definitely doesnt want to watch but obviously will be there for you because he knows better
the whole time he feels secondhand discomfort for you and feels your cries in his deep in his core cuz ur in pain and he doesn't like that 😕
this might sound weird, but i see him bringing his portable gaming system to the hospital so you can play with him and get ur mind off things
not saying his feeling towards the baby will change after the birth, but he'll definitely be like "oh wow 😳" when the baby is first born
have u ever seen that clip of steve irwin first looking at bindi when shes born and hes all amazed and awestruck by her?
its like that but its less noticeable and its more like "this is my child?"
a little scared to hold the baby at first because he's afraid to drop her
but once he does he'll look down at it and be like "ur not so bad afterall 😪"
DEFINITELY doesn't get any sleep during the first few months because he'll for some reason take late night feedings/crying upon himself
hes all "ur such a pain bro 😒" while rocking the baby back and forth to soothe it, all cuddly and gentle with it
tbh i cant decide whether it be a girl or boy so its up to reader to decide
omg hes mortified after the first belch spit hes gone afterwards
literally condemns the baby to hell
hates changing diapers but does it for the sake of the baby's comfort and health
when he's alone with the baby, he'd be like "ur kinda ugly 🤔" while playing around with it
tbh i see him getting random bouts of urges to play with the baby and speaking to it in a baby voice secretly
gets really embarrassed if hes caught and acts like it never happened
when ur not there to watch the baby while he's gaming he'll actually be okay with the baby sitting in his lap while he games
if he wins he'll be all "lets goooo 😝" all up in the babies face 😭 lifting it up into the air and just being such a gamer dad
also starts teaching the baby how to play games real early on, making them hold a controller or something and teaching them game logistics
the baby is like 5 months old and doesn't know about taxes but knows about dnd 🤣🤦🏽♀️
i see him like announcing the birth of his kid to his followers/fans a couple weeks after the birth
only shows what the baby looks like when its like 6 months old and crawling all in the background, he'll turn around and be like "wanna see my baby?", lift up the baby and put it's face all up close into the camera 😭
does 0.5 and only 0.5 photos on the thing 😅
does a couple more streams afterwards when he "games" with the baby and blame loosing on the poor thing 😅
aw i can see him and the baby having matching outfits when he goes out with it
he's not the best dad, but he'll try his hardest
on a sweet note, if kenma feels lonely when ur away, he'll allow the baby to sleep in the bed he shares with you as a "substitution" and cuddle with it
yk that tiktok audio that goes "leave me alone baby 😒" and then goes "ur my baby i love you ☹️☹️🥰😘" yeah that hes that
#haikyuu yandere#haikyuu headcanons#haikyū!!#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu pregnant#haikyuu breeding#haikyuu angst#haikyuu#haikyu smut#haikyuu!! smut#haikyuu smut#haikyu x reader#haikyuu texts#haikyuu fluff#kenma smut#kenma x you#kenma x reader smut#kozume kenma x reader#kenma fluff#kenma x reader#kozume kenma#hq kenma#haikyuu kenma#kenma kuzome#⨳ family dream
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💋 VALENTINES WITH JAEHYUN
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ established relationship! jaehyun x reader
decided to do a little something something for jaehyun’s b-day and for valentines all at once 😚
Happy Valentine’s Day my loves and Happy Jaehyun Day!! 💖
divider credit @missroki 💌
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ JAEHYUN
this could honestly go both ways; either you celebrate both valentines and his birthday in one day or you choose to celebrate Valentine and his birthday separate depending how busy his schedule is
jaehyun always makes sure to ask you to be valentines the moment it’s Feb. 1, only once did it slip his mind…he learned his lesson there when you were about to sell him on Twitter 💀
for his birthday I feel like he would try not to make it a big deal but at the same time does just because he knows what some of the plans will be since he always ends up having last minute scheduling and wants to down his as much time as he can with you before said schedule
rarely do you guys have to reschedule things…but SM can be a pain in the ass so you guys always gotta make room for everything
honestly for moments where you do have to reschedule, he just brings you along with him. man don’t care about the public cause at this point SM is literally asking for it 💆🏻
everyday leading up to v-day he writes you hand written notes about the things he loves about you 💌
let’s be honest here…Jae is a BIG romantic fellow when he wants to be. like yeah he’s all shy and flustered about it but it’s what makes you love him and it makes you wanna squish him for how cute he’s being
i see his ears turning red the whole time just because he’s that shy about it :( such a cutie
the sex; oh my gods it’s intimate and passionate as fuck!!! literally what you both will be waiting for by the end of the day (if y’all can even make it to the end of the day)
jaehyun would seriously buy you sexy pieces of clothing just to end up ripping it off of you 🤪
“I’ll buy you new one baby don’t worry.”
literally would tell you this just so you’re not worrying about the fact that he “wasted” his money like that (man could care less because he’s pleasing both of y’all)
Okay but the after care???? honestly one of the best things he ever does for you 😩🫶🏼
Always getting you water, making sure you’re okay, giving you a well needed shower cause babes y’all were nasty nasty that night WHEW 😜
“You did so good for me baby.”
like UGHHHHHHH man makes me feral honestly
if you’re feeling up for it, he would carry you to the living room and make y’all food 🥹
you would protest that this was supposed to be his day and you would be the one doing everything for him but he would always brush you off and tell you that he loves taking care of you even if it is his day
get married at this point folks cause I would 😭💍
honestly…he would propose
and I KNOW it will be out of the blue 💀 like you’re just chilling in the living room eating ramen together, watching what’s every playing on the tv.
“we should get married.”
YOU WILL LITERALLY CHOKE ON THE NODDLE 😭😭
“W-what!?”
“I mean why not? I don’t think it’s a bad idea..do you?”
the puppy eyes he would give you
literally like this 🥺🙏🏼
how could you say no???
had to make a little post for our Valentine’s boy Jaehyun 🥰
first time I do something like this and I’m honestly thinking of doing more like this cause this was fun 🤭
Lemme know what y’all think! Should I make more posts like this 🤔???
Much love 🖤
— mochi 💌
#jung jaehyun#jaehyun#nct jaehyun#jaehyun x reader#jaehyun x y/n#happy birthday Jaehyun#valentine with Jaehyun#nct#nct smut#nct 127#kpop#kpopidol#kpop imagines#romance#senario#smut#valentines day#happy valentine's day#valentines gifts
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Messages from your pet/s 🐱🌜💖
Hi friends! A long time ago I said I would publish a PAC reading centered around messages from your pets 💗 here it is! Enjoy 🍵 feel free to like, comment and reblog! Pick a bouquet —>
Pile 1: The Magician • 4 of wands
Hi pile 1’s! Welcome to your pile 💗🍵 I feel your per first of all, loves hanging around you. They could actually be your soulmate manifested in a different being this lifetime 🤍 they are your other half essentially. Some of you may own black cats! I feel right away your pet has an auspicious message about a new event, person or celebration coming up for you. This could be something you actually wanted and it’s coming your way 🤗 so definitely enjoy that! That sounds wonderful and I feel your pet is actually guiding your manifestations in a way. They are a guardian, and they also protect you from energies that don’t serve your highest good in this lifetime. Their existence deflects negativity! I heard a long time ago if cats purr they are taking away pain or something 🤔 I have no idea how true this is, but comment below and let me know! Because I am seeing a cat rubbing against you and purring a lot to get rid of evil eye 🧿🪬 so your animals are very protective, even the ones that aren’t a cat 🤣 they do watch over you, and love to spend time with you 🙌 I think if there is someone you don’t like, they will know right away and give that person a full on stare, or not interact with them. Thats your sign your animal supports you 💅🏻 and also is saying that person is negative (I heard full of shit but I resorted to respectful tactics 🤣) wow so your pet is definitely not one to mess with! I hope you are all well pile 1’s! Thank you for coming by and I appreciate any support to this blog 🤍
Pile 2: Seven of wands • Ace of cups
Hi pile 2’s! Welcome to your reading 🤗💘 excited to have you here! Lets see what messages your pet has for you. I see that they feel fulfilled, cared for and loved by you. They have a special spiritual bond with you, so maybe you see them in dreams, or they will have messages for you in your waking life when you spend time with them. Sometimes its almost like, “wait, why can I hear you talking? Im the human one” 🤣 now, unless you have schizophrenia, which please be careful and get that checked out! Your animal is trying to communicate with you via intuition, and loves to connect with you that way. You two share a special soul bond. A message they have is to persevere any issue you have right now, and they believe in you 🙌 they got your back, and they believe in your ability to move past an issue or situation! Or if times have been rough, they want to be there for you and spend time with you to make you feel better 🥹💘 honestly that is so sweet. But they definitely want to see you smile again. Im drawn to notice how the ace of cups in this deck has a bouquet too 🤣 just like our piles themes. So get some flowers if you’re not allergic. Put them in your space! Or garden, if it’s not winter in your hemisphere. Caring for plants is important now. Or being in nature will lift your energy 💘🤗 thank you pile 2’s! I appreciate you coming by, please support this blog in any way you can 🍵🙌
Pile 3: The lovers • 5 of swords
Hi pile 3’s! 💘🍵🤍 Welcome, please enjoy this message brought to you by your loving pet. So far I see if they have passed away, or had an injury they remember you 🥹💘 they did not forget you at all. They are watching over you. And somehow I feel they left something for you behind, there’s almost an energetic baggage of love and abundance at your doorstep. In a good way, they left behind something beautiful you can transform in this lifetime. Whether they are alive or not, your pet has brought in a different energy into your life and you probably noticed the shift right away. This could be an emotional support animal! This pet brought love and care into your life, and they are thankful for your presence 🤗💘 they miss you always, even if they are around you now. Some of you may have had a parakeet, or a bigger bird. They want you to remember the good times and smile because you had them 🤍 so whether your pet is alive or not, they want you to enjoy your moments with them, and everyone. There’s such an unconditional loving energy here, its beautiful 🥹💗 they want you to be accepting, and less harsh on yourself is what I heard. You did all you could is also something I heard. I forgive you. There are some intense energies here, please take care pile 3’s ❤️🩹 I am wishing you the best and all the love and peace!
Paid Readings 🍵💘
Distance Energy Healing Services💌🧘♀️
#devi post#astrology#astrology community#tarotcommunity#divination#tarot deck#tarot#witchcraft#tarot reading#astrology observations#astro posts#astrology notes#astro notes#we love pink 💗💗#pick a pile#pick a card romance#pick a picture#pick a card#pick one
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johanna finding out reader sh? 🤔 i'm in desperate need of johanna fanfics 😓
two broken people - j.m.
summary: johanna finds out that you aren’t as ok as you seem.
pairings: johanna x fem!reader
warnings: self harm, depression, suicidal ideation, angst, hurt/comfort
author’s note: if anyone is struggling with these issues, please do not hesitate to reach out to me. you are not alone.
You wondered why you were alive, why you survived. Your hands bloodied with the blood of many. You don’t want to keep living. You don’t deserve it. The hopelessness grips onto your bones, settling deep within your soul. Everything is numb, yet you still smile your fake smile, you still laugh that fake laugh. It didn’t matter how many people you were always around, the inexcusable feeling of being lonely weighs down on your chest.
Johanna has noticed something different about you, but you cannot seem to bring yourself to care. You can’t seem to keep up the act.
After training you were exhausted, mentally and physically. You quickly darted out of the training area, speed walking to Johanna and yours room. When arriving at the room you quietly closed the door, going towards your stash of razors you picked out the sharpest one.
[i tried it like before and this time i made a deep cut]
You rolled up your sleeves, not even wincing at the way they stuck to your past wounds. You took a deep inhale, pressing the razor hard against your skin before you exhaled and drove it deep into your flesh watching as the blood oozes out.
[i thought about my friends and the way i didnt give enough]
Distantly, you should’ve known it would’ve been too deep. The blood starts to ooze out in a faster yet still somewhat sluggish pace, you feel dizzy and lightheaded. Vaguely you thought you didn’t really want to die.
[and i shouldve told my mother, “mom, i love you,” like a good son]
You stumbled into your desk, before you could think much about it you cut even deeper on your other wrist. A smile mixed with relief and remorse carved its way onto your features. You hear the door open, but you can’t really focus on anything but going to lay down.
[but this life is overwhelming and im ready for the next one]
“Y/N! Oh god… what did you do?!” Johanna yelps, running to you immediately. You can barely make out the words she’s saying. All you can think about, is how you’ll finally be free.
[take the blade away from me]
“Let me go…” You whisper, your voice sounds weak and slurred.
[i am a freak, i am afraid that]
Johanna shakes her head, “No! You promised… you promised me.” she says, desperately.
[all the blood escaping me won’t end the pain]
Johanna desperately screams for help, you vaguely see Katniss run in, the shock and despair on her face is heartbreaking.
[and i’ll be haunting all the lives that cared for me]
You can’t seem to get your eyes to stay open, you can hear Johanna screaming, crying, and sobbing, yet you can’t bring yourself to stay awake.
You woke with a start, looking around you you see that you’re in medical. You clench your teeth. Looking down you see the bandages on your wrists and … tears start streaming down your cheeks.
“Y/N? it’ll be ok. i’m here,” You sob even harder at your girlfriends words.
“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry.” You sob into her shoulder, gripping onto her shirt like its your lifeline, and it very well could be.
At least, at least you have Johanna. Two broken people trying to love, trying to heal.
#johanna mason x reader#johanna mason#johanna mason x fem!reader#self insert#tw sh related#the hunger games x reader#the hunger games
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Synastry aspects that I personally don’t like.
before i start please read that I am not an official astrologer so take this with a grain of saltttt too haha. Just for fun.
North node square north node ( I’m sorry but each one lives in a whole different worlds, completely different perspectives, mindset, somehow not letting each other move to the next step)
Chiron in 7th house overlay. ( now Chiron isn’t always bad, but there’s kind of.. pain it gives , it’s not any better in other houses, but I’m saying romantically, there could be hurt during the marriage... if you want Chiron overlays in synastry please lmk)
Pluto/Uranus in 12th house overlay. ( now Mose of y’all know 12th house overlays arent so good eventually, but i think Pluto or Uranus being there could be harsher than any other planet , could indicate so many things, one of them unpleasant endings in the relationship, finding truth about something suddenly, betrayal..in worst cases you won’t be able to forget each other )
Saturn 8th house overlay. (Sure y’all know why..)
Mars conjuct Mc/10th house. ( uhhhh it just don’t give me nice vibes when both are seen in public eye. Could be arguing in public a lot, the mars person makes it hard for the 10th person to forgive them. Works even in composite chart )
Mercury square Saturn. ( a lot of judgements and misunderstandings)
Chiron opposite asc/Venus.
Saturn opposite Neptune. (Broo)
Moon opposite moon. (Now tbh Im not really sure of this one since nobody complained about it and it could indicate “slight” emotional understanding difficulties with each other that can also cause attraction. But I’ve seen this aspect with some couple that really can’t stop hurting eachothers emotionally . )
Another moon aspect, ofc moon is the first thing you should observe In synastry s, it simply represents how each other’s emotions play with the other. now moon square moon. Obviously most of y’all know why, literally each one is on different page when it comes to how they view emotions which makes it pretty hard to understand each other’s feelings with the square aspect. ( believe it or no I have this one with my man, even knowing it I’m still with him lol. yes the attraction is definitely there due to other loving aspects and also with this one, it gives attractive energy yes. but still, he don’t understand my emotions and my point of view, struggles with analyzing me sometimes or what I even think , even when I try my best to throw him an obvious sign about something, without me speaking, he don’t get it where everyone else does same goes for me 🤣😭. he sometimes thinks I mean something the opposite of what I meant. Bottom line is with this aspect you need to speak each other’s feelings and what you want to tell the other cause it’s way too impossible to understand eachother with no words spoken. 😓 AAAA THIS IS THE ONLY STRUGGLING PLACEMENT WE HAVE AND ITS NOT EVEN A SIMPLE ONE)
Mars in 5th house, ( Now this is NOT a red flag, bUTTTT i always read about this placement represents a “not lasting relationship “ and tbh every fling I had I had this placement with, literallyyyy very guy I used to dm or talk to even for a couple of days, attraction at first but then boom, you din yourself not talking to them anymore for god knows what reason lol, so there’s something interesting about this placement. 🤔🤣 ( pink for flings 🤣)
Mars 1st house.... ( uhh you know what? Wait for part 2 😛 )
But before part 2 I’ll make my next post positive I promise, I didn’t even want to write red flags placements because it shouldnt be taken seriously haha. So next post will be about .. hmm wait , what you guys want it to be about?
Synastry observations
Natal chart observations
composite observations
Solar return observations
— Y’all literally if u find one of these placements in your synastrys it’s totally okay lol, I have multiple of these w my man and tbh some of them don’t really play this negative way for us, but i just did them for fun , ofc don’t take these TOO seriously 🥰
#astro community#astro observations#astro placements#astrology placements#astrology tumblr#obsessed synastry#asteroids in synastry#d9 chart#elegant#expensive#astro notes#astrology#red flags
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PLS I NEED A FIC WHERE BIG DICK HAN IS TIED UP AND EDGED FOR HOURS BY M!READER UNTIL HE SHAKES AND WHINES 🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴
"h-hyung, p-please, I'm begging, I need to- ah-!" (Edged again) "Please h-hyung, it really hurts, it hurts" then he cries then you edge him for another hour 😩😩
Edge and ruin his damn orgasm atleast 20 times and he will literally cry and beg and shake just to cum
(in my Dom era, yes I like being both so I read both XDDDDDDDD)
So, after a little chat behind the scenes, @chuuchuu1224 is happy for me write this as a Minsung piece 😃 I don’t think I’ve ever written them by themselves before 🤔 … anyway we’re going classic Minsung with a needy Ji and a domming Min.
Hope you like it 😘 x. Sorsha
“M-min…p-please…” whined Jisung. “Need to cum… please…please let me…baby, please!”
“Shh! What did I say about your whining, Hmm?” Minho said coldly. “Just shut up and take your punishment.”
“I’m s-sorry, hyung!” He sobbed.
Jisung had been tied to bed for 3 hours now, and he was almost at breaking point. He looked a sight. He was completely naked, sweating, his big delicious cock swollen, angry and leaking, resting against his taut abs. Tears running down his cheeks.
Minho thought he looked perfect being this helpless. That’s why he has really taken his time to tease torment his lover. Just like he himself had been tortured all week by Jisung.
For the past six days he’d been teasing Minho, avoiding his touch and ignoring his glances, flirting with Hyunjin. Grr. It’d been driving him fucking crazy. Cock tease. “I promise you’re gonna pay for this.” He’d told him the other night. He was met with an attitude of “what are ya gonna do about it?”
Well, now Jisung knew exactly what Minho was doing about it.
“You can’t do this to me!!! Aahhh p-please.” He scrunched his eyes as he sobbed loudly.
Minho hovered over Jisung’s cock, taking it in his hand and squeezing it slightly.
“Fuuuccckkk!!! H-Hyung… stop teasing… I’m gonna die!”
Minho licked the dribbling pre-cum from the tip. It was probably the fifteenth time he’d done so today. Edging poor Ji until he was almost there, then simply licking the precum away and leaving him writhing on the bed.
His balls were so tight and painful looking too. Minho wondered how he’d react if he squeezed them?
“Hyung!!!!” He sobbed. Minho smirked.
“Sungie. You need to listen very carefully. I’m going to untie you now. But only so you can roll onto your stomach. Then you’re going to be tied again. No funny business.”
Jisung whined. “O-okay…”
Minho repositioned Jisung so he was lying on his stomach, arms stretched and tied above his head. He immediately started grinding against the bedspread.
“Ahh… fuck!”’ Jisung squealed as a hard slap landed on his ass.
“No grinding.” Growled Minho.
He bit his lower lip as he caressed the curve of Jisung’s back, causing the boy to shudder, then parting his cheeks and nestling his face between them to lick his hole.
A low groan came from Jisung as Minho ate him out. He knew it would drive him absolutely crazy. But there was something that he knew would really torture his poor boyfriend. He slipped a finger into his hole. Just to the first knuckle. He gently thrust into him one, two, three times, then removed his finger entirely.
“Fuck you, Minho! When I’m not tied up I’m gonna fuck you so hard you won’t be able to sit for a week.” He growled, trying to look back at him.
So he was at the stage of throwing threats now? He’d already begged and bargained to no avail. Desperate, needy boy.
“I mean it. I’m gonna fuck you up—aaahhh. F-fuck.”
Minho couldn’t hold out any longer and laid himself on top of Jisung and pushed his cock into his tight ass.
“Min…fuck…fuck…I’m… fuck you’re deep. P-please…ngh…”
Three deep, precise thrusts from Minho, and Jisung came with his cock squished between his stomach and the mattress. He shook and convulsed underneath Minho, making him almost come too.
“Min….no…too… it’s too much!”
“Shut up. Don’t you fucking know how much I’ve wanted to be buried in your ass this week?” He panted as he snapped his hips.
“Hyung…I love you.” Whimpered Jisung into the matress.
Minho’s thrusts halted for just s moment as his heart burst inside his chest.
“I love you too, Sungie. But for now I need to be a good little cocksleeve for me and be quiet.”
@channieandhisgoonsquad @noellllslut @itsseohannbin @weareapackofstrays @kangnina @3rachasdomesticbanana @palindrome969 @xxkissesforchanniexx @fun-fanfics @wolfennracha
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A Prompt List
Feel free to pick and choose from the list for your own stories, as well as send in requests (view my masterlist for who I write for) with whatever prompts if you please, 🥰
Angst/Fluff/Smut prompts listed. (18+)
Bonus points if you take the assigned genre and flip it 🤔😏
———
Angst
“Are you serious?” / “I never wanted this!”
“This was never real, was it?” / “I was just a warm body for those cold winter nights…”
“You are vile…” / “I can’t believe I ever believed someone like you could love me.”
“Nothing good ever lasts.” / “Goodbye.”
“I love you.” / “It’s not enough this time.”
“Please, don’t leave me, we can fix this.” /“You left me first, I’m just finishing the job.”
“I love you Y/N.” / “Why do people only say that to me when they’ve wronged me? Am I not deserving of the guiltless love? Like the ones I see in fairytales, where they get swept away smiling, and not where I curl up to weep in my bed for another damn night.”
“I’m sorry.” / “For what exactly? Breaking my trust, and in turn my fragile heart? Or do you only mean that you got caught?”
“I can’t even look at you anymore.” / “Please…” / “This is the end for us.”
“I can’t live without you, I won’t survive.” / “Then I guess I’ll be back for your funeral.”
Fluff
“There’s nobody else I’d ever love like this.”
“Everything I do is for you—my beloved.”
*while stargazing* “If I could, I’d rearrange the stars for you, have them map out your face, because a beauty like yours should transcend the bounds of Earth my darling.”
“I can’t believe that the world had infinite chances to find me a soulmate, and I lucked out and hit the absolute jackpot with you.”
“Did you know that a kiss is worth a thousand words?” / “You should kiss me.”
“You’re the most gorgeous person here.” / “I’d never lie to you darling, god, I wish you could see you the way I do” / “Perfect.”
“Call them —, the worst they could do is say no to you, and trust me, they won’t…” / “They said yes!!!”
“I’ve loved you since the first time I ever laid my eyes on you.” / “Well damn, why’s it taken you so long to make a move then?”
“I can’t believe my cat/dog loves you more than it’s ever loved me.” / “Actually, on second thought it makes sense, you’re far too lovable to even question it; *pets name* you have good taste.”
“I will never tire of watching you sleeping next to me, you’re just so peaceful, and I get to celebrate that you’re all mine.”
Smut
“Careful what you wish for baby, because I’m nothing if not generous…”
“Where should I sit?” / “The couch works just fine, but if you prefer comfort, my face works far better my darling.”
“I’m not letting you go until you’ve either drenched the sheets, or passed out.”
“Fuck me like you mean it —, let everybody know I’m yours before I no longer am.”
“Aww, did my precious little dove think I’d just let that little stunt go?” / “I was hoping so.” / “You’re sadly mistaken toots, now prepare yourself for a long night full of passion, and if you’re lucky—pain.”
“Mommy isn’t very pleased with the outfit you chose to wear tonight, you made those fools think they stood a chance.” / “Maybe they did.” / *incredulous laughter* “Is that right baby? I go on one week long business trip and you just forget who you belong to? Don’t worry sweetheart, I’ll remind you.”
“Stay still, or I’ll have you warming daddy’s cock all night long.” / “That’s a good girl.”
“I-I can’t take anymore, please.” / “You can take it, and you’ll do it graciously, one more complaint and I’ll edge you all month.”
“Kiss me, please.” / “Is that all you want baby, is for me to kiss you?” / “N-no, I also want you to fuck me senseless, but a kiss sounded far more romantic.”
“If you don’t fuck me, I’ll be doing it myself!” / “I’m coming!” / “No, I am!”
#angst prompt#angst prompts#angsty prompts#writing prompt#writing prompts#fluff prompt#fluff prompts#fluffy prompts#smut prompts#smutty prompts
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New art incoming 🤗
I often like to daydream, and I periodically come up with different branches of the plot of the boys’ series🤔
Like, has anyone ever wondered why John never held a grudge against Vaught for everything they did to him?
and what if we assume that the situation with Becca Butcher was not so brutal, and there was simply an affair between them, after the consequences of which (in the form of Ryan) Vought forced her to disappear?
what if in the experiment to create the most powerful super he was not the only one, but he was the only one who was lucky enough to survive? Just imagine all the pain, and anger?
Thinking about all of the above changes, I can imagine a situation where, somewhere in a parallel universe, Homelander could very well fit into the Boys’ company and spoil Vought’s company’s life on the sly😏😉
#homelander#fanart#the boys series#alternate universe#sketch#the boys#billy butcher#butchlander#the boys au#alternative universe
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92 or 14 maybe? 🤔
Going with 14!
--
Prince Anthony was picking his feathers out again.
Steve wordlessly set his shield aside and walked over to grab his hands, yanking them down, away from his wings. "Your highness--"
"I know!" Prince Anthony exclaimed defensively. His wrists jerked in Steve's grip, though, back toward his wings, and he wilted under Steve's stern glare. "I know," he repeated miserably.
It broke Steve's heart, but he turned to grab the picking glove, and while Prince Anthony obediently stuck his hands in so the mouth could be cinched tight around his wrists, he couldn't help but think it wasn't fair. Maybe Prince Anthony wouldn't be picking himself bald if he didn't have to choose a suitor in the next three days.
Prince Anthony had always been put off by the cock parties, as he'd called them--"cockerel balls" had always seemed to lend a layer of refinement to them that they didn't deserve, he'd said. Mostly, it was young cocks approaching and trying to impress prospective hens, and as Prince Anthony had a sizeable fortune behind him, he'd been the one most flocked to. It had made him suspicious, nervous even, of anyone's attention. Steve had watched, heart sinking with every ball, as grabby kids who barely knew what to do with a cloaca fawned all over Prince Anthony for the chance at his wing in matrimony.
It had given him nothing but a dim view on mating parties and cocks in general, which was probably why he'd gotten away with his secret for so long. He was so visibly disgusted after each cockerel ball that everyone assumed even if he was pregnant, he'd get rid of it as quickly as possible. Only when the rumors about his sudden cravings for sardines and almonds got loud enough to reach the royal court did it become necessary for Prince Anthony to undergo medical examination. And, well, when it was found to be true, that a royal hatchling was on the way, an unwed, pregnant royal was deemed a hazard to... what was it they had said? Public decency and the dignity of the crown?
Either way, it meant that another cockerel ball had been set up as quickly as possible, and Prince Anthony no longer had the choice of saying no to all comers if he wanted to keep his financial backing, even if he plucked himself bare in the meantime.
Steve watched Prince Anthony begin to pace, feeling helpless. His prince was in trouble, and he could do nothing of import to stop it. Prince Anthony looked like a caged animal as he walked up and down the carpet. He wasn't even showing yet. Was the palace hoping to get him wed immediately and lie about the hatchling being early? Someone would be bound to talk. That's what had started this mess, after all.
"I suppose," Prince Anthony began, voice halting and pained as he turned to pace in front of the window, obviously hoping the sun's rays would help him feel better. "That Lady Pepper is. Nice enough. Could pass the egg off as hers if we married."
"I suppose," Steve agreed, hoping he sounded noncommittal instead of just bitter.
"Or. Or that kind--Bruce? I think?"
"The alchemist Bruce was very kind," Steve answered with a nod.
"Or I could... I could just..." Prince Anthony stopped in front of the window, staring outside. Then, as quickly as he stopped, he turned around, eyes wide and beseeching. "Run away with me."
Steve's mouth dropped open in shock. He blinked at Prince Anthony slowly, unable to comprehend what he'd just been asked. Prince Anthony was a well-loved public figure, and while Steve was famous for his work in the war, he'd never been... someone people wanted to see running the country. In fact, if anyone ever found out that he was the one who had henned the heir apparent, he likely wouldn't be able to see him again. Prince Anthony was royalty. Steve had clawed his way up from the streets. He was only Prince Anthony's personal guard because there had been several attempts on his life, and Steve was the best at what he did.
"Run... away...?" Steve finally repeated, still not quite believing it.
"I'm just a figurehead for this stupid country," Tony spat, hope giving way to anger. "They only kept royalty on as a tradition they didn't know how to quit, as a show. I don't have any real power. And that's how they can bully me into getting married, picking a cock I don't even like all that much to be the legitimate father of my egg--So. So let's run away."
There were many reasons why Steve should say no. The country loved Prince Anthony, for one--he was only behind his late mother in terms of charity, and was quickly gaining on her record; despite the fact that he had no real power, he always did his best to influence parliament to vote in favor of the people; and the whole country had collectively swooned when a tabloid had leaked a picture of him holding a baby at the hospital with the quote 'babies need to be held' splashed under it. Steve was a nobody, come up from nothing, and most people did not have good things to say about him coming up from nothing because of the war.
Prince Anthony's gaze was steady, though, when Steve met his eyes. He was certain of his decision. That was one of the things Steve liked about him--he knew what he wanted, and if he could get it, he eagerly went through with it. And if he couldn't get it, he was a gracious loser.
"Your highness," Steve began with a sigh.
"I don't care if we're poor," Prince Anthony continued before he could voice his dissent, the determination in his voice making Steve's mouth snap shut in surprise. "You'll take care of us. And I--I have an education. I can get a job to help. You helped make this egg," he added sharply. "Are you refusing to take responsibility? And could you really just let someone else raise your chick?"
If he told himself it was for the better, to make sure the chick got everything it needed or wanted, he probably could. Prince Anthony would love it enough for the both of them, even if his new spouse only tolerated the chick. It wasn't ideal, but then, neither was getting Tony laden with egg before marriage. A marriage that couldn't happen because of who he was and who Prince Anthony had turned out to be. Steve opened his mouth to tell him in no uncertain terms that he would not be taking the spot from a more deserving rooster.
But he didn't want to. And Tony was clearly showing he didn't want to either. So he looked up at Tony and nodded sharply. "Alright, Tony."
"Tony," he repeated in a whisper, shocked. Steve only ever called him that in bed; he needed the separation of work and intimacy, and it helped to remind Tony, too, that he couldn't reach out and touch whenever he wanted. Steve watched as Tony's mouth spread into a wide smile as he lunged toward him, hooking his bound hands behind Steve's neck and pulling him down for an overjoyed kiss just bordering on desperation. Apparently, eschewing his proper name was all the real confirmation he needed of Steve's feelings.
Steve threw his wings up in a mating display just to make sure there was no misunderstanding.
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SnowBaird I found romantic in the Book Part 7
He was so afraid of what might have happened to her, he was close to ugly crying in that train. He was holding back those tears.
He just wants to see her again and see that she's okay and hope that she still loves him.
Like I said, the thought of her dead pains him.
Yeah, what did possess him to go to the poorest of districts and condemn himself there for maybe 20 years (he doesn't even know about officer training or about his diploma yet) not knowing if Lucy Gray is dead or alive or if she even still interested in him???🤔hhmmm what could it be?? What drives a boy to Hades when he could've had a better option and with better opportunities in other districts? Hmmm? 🤔
his heart leaped at the mention of her 🥰. Also "he would wrap her in his arms and never let her go"😭 He loved her so much
He just wants to see her again dammit😭
I just wanna put this here cuz I just really love the symbolic comparison to the birds.
Again, what person who thinks of another as their prize and object would be insecure about seeing them again? Why would they care about their thoughts if they are sure that they are their possession?
He was in awe with her and instantly possessive 🤭. He was starstrucked, beguiled, enthralled, bewitched. She was beautiful to him (and begrudgingly knows, to everyone as well)
Part 6
Part 8
#snowbaird#coriolanus snow#tbosas#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#coriolanus snow x lucy gray baird#thg#the hunger games
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Phee and Tan sitting in a tree P-L-O-T-T-I-N-G 🥳
I already rewatched episodes 1-4 once, when it turned out that Phee knew Non, and I even joked that when it turns out that he was working with Tan (there were already theories that Tan was New), I would have to watch these episodes ONCE AGAIN 😄 Not that I'm complaining! I love this series and when I like a series, I love coming back to it.
I was going to do it now, especially after episode 10, where the characters were behaving weirdly, but after reading @tbhimnoteasyonmyself fantastic post, I don't have to do it anymore (although I still plan to, maybe after the finale?) because everything is written there 😍
While watching Phee's telling his story to Jin, illustrated with his scenes with Tan and SCENES OF TAN HIMSELF, I kept thinking, wait a minute. What? This is his story, why is he telling shit about Tan, where's his version? Later someone pointed out, that so far, the series has shown events as they are. And yet, suddenly we have a story, and only from one POV.
And this story surprisingly whitewashes Phee and makes Tan a monster.
There's a lot that can be said about Phee, but I never got the impression that he was a coward, that he would gossip about someone he was so close to, just like that, even with Non he wasn't a petty bitch. No matter how angry Phee was at Tan, his pretty much nasty behavior as a friend, exposing him to Jin and then the rest of the crew, was completely ooc. And who would he do it for? For them? His "friends"? Are we sure Phee considers them "friends"?
That's why I watched episode 10 again, and the second time it seemed even more strange and raised a lot of questions.
Like that scene in the temple:
how easily Phee accuses Tan. He thinks that Tan created a whole complex and based on a series of random coincidences, yet effective plan to kill Por, he thinks that Tan killed Deng by stretching a wire in broad daylight when someone could have noticed him, he thinks that Tan planned another complicated, based on a series of random coincidences, and yet a super effective action with a scooter, luring Top to the temple, poisoning him, hypnotizing him and sending him home to kill people???
Phee talks the most about Tan, portraying him as the biggest threat, and then starts telling a tearful story, "you don't know what I did", "it's all my fault", "I was so terrible towards Non". What's interesting is that Phee doesn't cry in this scene (at least I don't see any tears, although the lighting isn't good), and as we know, Phee cries easily when he's in pain
what effect does Phee achieve? JIN CONFESSES
TA DA! 🥳🎉🏆
what is Phee's reaction to this - a sigh that sounds like a mix of relief and triumph. And disbelief.
another interesting fact: Phee reacts the same way as to Non's "betrayal", at first he seems unable to believe what he hears, then he starts to pace around furiously, trying to control himself. The only difference is that Jin, unlike Non, does not fuel his anger by staying quiet..
During this time, Tan:
tries to calm Tee down, he wants White to take his gun 🤔
interestingly, later he doesn't stop Fluke when he has a gun! 😏
When Phee and Jin show up at home:
Phee informs everyone that Tan is Non's brother and that he WANTS REVENGE
REMEMBER THAT EVERYONE IS HIGH 🚨
Phee creates an atmosphere of threat, revenge that they deserve, and that it's about Non
REMEMBER THAT EVERYONE IS HIGH 🚨🚨
and what's happening? Phee conveniently doesn't have to say more about Tan and Non, because right after that Fluke takes action, steals the gun, has hallucinations, and kills Top
REMEMBER THAT EVERYONE IS HIGH, they just saw a murder, emotions are running high and they feel trapped 🚨🚨🚨
I watched Tan because I love him from that moment on, he is very pleased with the development of events, he is not angry with Phee at all, Phee also suddenly forgets that Tan was supposed to be the biggest monster and a threat
they both actually behave as if they were playing roles, they recite their lines like they're children in a school play, they play the good cop and the bad cop?
what is the effect of all this: TEE FINALLY STARTS TELLING THE TRUTH!!! 🥳🎉🏆
So I have to ask: How were Phee and Tan supposed to get information about Non after getting the boys high on the first night at the party, as Phee said to Jin? They were supposed to be having a great time and then suddenly Phee and Tan would start questioning them about Non and they would just... blurt out everything? 😆
When did Phee and Tan start getting information?
NOW.
So, isn't it the case that Phee and Tan rightly guessed that only Tee could know what happened to Non, because the only one capable of making someone disappear is his uncle? There's a lot to be said about the other guys, but they probably don't have the ability, strength, or stomach to "disappear" a person. Probably not even Tee, but he may have something else: INFORMATION.
Did Phee betray Tan in this ep? I'm 99% sure not. They both watch calmly as the rest of the "friends" accuse each other. Phee pays special attention to Tan AND to Tee:
Isn't the most important thing for them (or for Tan especially) is discovering the truth that Tee knows, and the rest is just an accidental casualty of their war? Jin may be important to Phee, who might even want to protect him... but maybe not? Maybe Phee has a moral problem with all of this, but he doesn't feel morally better to stop Tan, seeing what all their "friends" started has led to, and even though he doesn't agree with him, he won't bother him?
(While watching episode 10 again, I also noticed this:
The shadow in the left corner was moving, it looked like there was someone else in the temple with Tan and Top. Non? Perth? Or maybe that woman Keng was working with?)
EDIT: so what I'm trying to say is that Phee and Tan could work together and manipulate others to obtain information about Non, regardless of the costs, and in Tan's case even enjoying the "costs". At least I would like it to be so 😉
Of course, I may see something that isn't there, want to see something more, have too high expectations of DFF. I'm pretty sure that's not the case, but like my dear friend @italianpersonwithashippersheart I've also seen too many good shows that screwed up the ending...
But I still have hope 😚 DFF maintained a high standard for me throughout its 10 episodes. Even if they fuck up the ending, even if everything that surprised me in this episode turns out to be me cosplaying Fluke and seeing things that aren't there (and cosplaying Top, because I'm hypnotized by Tan), it's still 10 episodes of excellent content 💖
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I was thinking here. Armand is a Mind Gift's master and anyone who's read the books knows it, so obviously he'll be very powerful when it comes to using it in the show too. We have them using the Cloud Gift and the Fire Gift (maybe), but the mind is the field where Armand is most skilled.
So we're discussing and thinking about the influence of this power he has over Louis and Daniel, right.
In my opinion and in the opinion of several other people, the conclusion we've come to is that Daniel probably asked Armand to erase his memories, but what if Louis asked him to do the same? Armand says he's protecting Louis from himself, so we'd not only have Daniel asking Armand to do it, but Louis as well.
And then comes another topic, if Louis and Daniel asked for it, then why the second interview? Why this theater for Daniel? Why put Louis through so much emotional pain? Why?🤔
Perhaps Armand's power and influence over Daniel and Louis' minds is so strong that he has them hooked and not even Armand could reverse the situation? So the only less painful way would be to make Louis and Daniel remember for themselves?
Does Louis in that bar, when he meets Daniel, look like someone whose memories have already been altered? Remember that Louis says that the last time he killed was in 2000 and we know how painful it is for his mind to take a life? So until 2000 Armand was "fighting" in a way to protect Louis from himself???
What was Louis and Daniel's limit? How far did they both go to tell Armand "please make this pain stop. You're the only one who can make the pain go away" - for Daniel and Louis, in a way, their greatest pains are still connected to Armand.
Armand wouldn't deny them that, Armand loves them and will serve them. Everything Armand does is for Daniel and Louis and if he's behind the second interview, then it's because it's for Daniel and Louis too.
I read someone saying that Daniel was going to use the tapes of the first interview to make Louis remember, but we know that in s1 Daniel throws the tapes away and Louis burns them, then Daniel deletes them from the computer. But if it's Armand through Louis using the Fire Gift to destroy the tapes, then what would be the point? Daniel had a backup in the drive? (I don't doubt it haha)
So I think there's a dark corner we're not seeing here, some guilt we can't reach and maybe that's the plot twist? Or maybe they don't even want to go that far and it's as simple as we've been theorizing all along.
But in my opinion Armand is also a character who carries guilt. He tries to be perfect in everything, especially in serving others, and tolerating one failure or frustration in this regard destroys him completely.
Armand dealt with Louis by being passive, cold, a rose in a vase and then he dealt with Daniel who was pure fury and rebellion, who didn't mince his words and who dealt with him head on, they are extremes and they belong to Armand whether we like it or not. But in the series it sounds a bit different, doesn't it? But the same.
(Last observation, at first I thought that Louis and Armand wanted Daniel there so that he would remember something and that something would be of value to Louis and Armand as if, suddenly, Daniel had met Lestat halfway and now Armand and Louis want to know when and how that was, but it's crazy. End of story.)
#Armand#Louis#Daniel Molloy#iwtv#interview with the vampire#armand x daniel#armand x louis#Loumand#Armandaniel#Dubai trio#my-post
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Review for a DID… plushie?
Today I’m doing a very basic and important review on Plushie Dreadful’s Dissociative Identity Disorder Bunny
Which I bought because isnt it cute! Also I just had to, a bunny with DID? Sounds familiar.. 🤔
Price: $45 USD
Company: Mysterious
You can find the plush for sale >>here<<
~initial thoughts~
I think you and I must be thinking the same: what an absurd thing to buy! A plush based off a trauma disorder? This could be offensive even if its coming from a weird place of stigmatizing disorders
I looked a little into the company though and found that they make a lot of different disorder-based plushies, as well as based on chronic illnesses and queer identities.
There’s also this note on the DID bunny page itself:
IMPORTANT NOTE Regarding the design of our mental health-related Plushie Dreadfuls. We take the topics of mental health and mental health awareness seriously. That's why our design team only creates plushies related to mental health issues with which they have direct experience. In cases where our team does not have direct experience, we assemble an external team of experts to help guide our creative process. In addition, we use Crowd Design to engage a wide range of voices via platforms like Instagram and Facebook. We gather and respond to feedback from our audience - many of whom have direct experience with the mental health issues we're exploring. And while we strive to represent as many aspects of a particular mental health issue as possible while avoiding stereotypical symptoms, we hope you understand that plush toys as an artistic medium do limit the full expression of a particular issue to those things that can be crafted in fabric and stitching.
Obviously they go through a lot of widespread effort to have people with personal experience weigh in on their plush designs. Is it going to be suited to every person w a CDD’s tastes? Absolutely not, but I personally think they put a lot of care into it.
Heres some pics of the one I bought:
Its a fluffy white rabbit plush with wide, white eyes, and a grey bunny appliqué on the forehead. There’s the interlocking circles multiplicity pride symbol on the tummy. The arms are all white with grey paws, and the stubby legs are all white with pink paw pads. In the ears there’s soft fabric with the printed image of three bunnies stacked on top of eachother that are dark grey, reddish pink and white respectively. There’s a tote bag underneath the bunny plush with a design that matches the ears.
(Sorry idk how to do the image description thing help)
I think the plush design conveys the feelings of DID very well, actually. White eyes that could perhaps symbolize dissociating or looking frozen in terror. Black and red together are commonly associated with pain and trauma in art. White might be for the parts untouched by trauma, or healed.
They grey bunny stitched onto the forehead is..
Their Trauma Bunny
Its a grey rabbit plush thats small and has uneven limbs and ears. There are two red x’s on the tummy, a black x for the mouth, and downturned eyes depicting a pained expression.
Since this trauma bunny is literally stitched to the forehead if the DID bunny, it’s almost as if to say that trauma is a central feature of the DID itself; which I thought was a nice careful touch that could’ve easily been ignored and focused instead on the multiplicity aspect.
There’s obviously a lot of care and attention to detail put into this bunbun and I very much appreciate it
~How the Bun feels~
Texture: the main fur Soft with medium length, dense fur. It feels closer to the stuffed animals I had as a kid, compared to the super-soft and eventually pilly fur you get on buildabears and jellycat bashful bunnies. Only time will tell of course.
The fur on the ears is very soft with short, printed-on designs. I think its close to something like minky fabric, but shorter and thinner
Weight: idk, it doesn’t have any beanies in it so it’s lighter than I thought it would be. The ears don’t have stuffing/very little stuffing in them so they’re pretty weightless and floppy. Something I really like in bunny ears actually.
Ratings for…:
Playing with(moving the joints): 9/10 (the sewing is such that the arms and megs move easily yay!)
Holding the hand/paw of: 6/10 (the paws are a little small for me, the arms a little stubby for holding hands)
Sitting: 10/10 (the ears help it sit up on its own, the legs fold nicely and look very cute)
Standing: 3/10 (doesnt stand up very well)
Holding the ear of: 11/10 (super softie)
Holding like a hamburger: 9/10 (a smidge small but otherwise pleasent)
Snuggles against the chest: 8/10
Squishability: 5/10 (not a squishable but a very even amount of squishy and dense)
Appliqué: 10/10 (very neat stitching, unobtrusive)
Fur shedding: 10/10 (seems like its very stable and theres no shedding)
Here is my DID bunny compared to my medium Jellycat bashful bunny and the tiny version:
The previously described white DID bunny. There’s a grey small bashful bunny with multicolored flower print in the ears on the left. On the right, there’s a navy blue medium sized bashful bunny. The DID bunny is slightly smaller than the medium bashful bunny
(The blue bunnys name is April Showers, and the grey bunnys name is May Flowers btw)
~ Extra thoughts idk what to do with~
- I don’t know the history of the interlocking circles symbol or if its problematic in any way. I’m assuming its something the community decided on when contributing feedback on the initial design. Thoughts? It seems to have to do with the old DID forums from a time before I knew I had DID, so I’m intrigued by the history
- I don’t personally mind that theres a DID-themed plush out there. Might not be everyone’s cuppa tea but it makes me happy to have a little soft companion for watching movies and reading books with. Its a really neat aspect to my growing DID collection :D
- I’m so fond of the scenecore kinda design for these bunnies. As a kid I desprately wanted a bunny with that gothic lolita, stitched up aesthetic and this is just so cool and special to me now :>
- I’m super sorry if the image descriptions arent great! This is a personal just-for-fun blog so I dont think I can manage something like that for all my reviews, but since this ones very visual I thought I’d try. Just sorry if its not good :( if theres anyone who’s like to rewrite them to actually work I’d be willing to replace my descriptions
- she needs a name! If you have name ideas i would love to hear them. Something DID related perhaps! i might run a poll on this for fun :D
- ps. All this was written mostly by a small part so pls be nice thank u 💛🥰
#dissociative identity disorder#did in media#dissociative identity disorder media#plushie dreadfuls#plushie dreadfuls did#plush review#actuallydid#otherwise specified dissociative disorder#cdd#complex dissociative disorder#bunnidid reviews
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https://www.tumblr.com/darkroomkisses/718148765586980864/pairings-rafe-cameron-x-topper-thornton-x
okay, hear me out.. a blurb about reader actually remembering what happened and getting into it with rafe the next day 🤔 would love to see what rafe would say/do
What You shouldn't Do (Dark!Rafe Cameron x Reader)
A/N: OMG Thank you SO MUCH @proactivetypaperson and Anon!! Sorry for the delay (mental block sucks) but I love and appreciate the comments! So here is a blurb/part two of her confronting Rafe. (spoiler: not a happy ending lol) 🥀 !READ TAGS!
Pairings: Dark!Rafe Cameron x Reader
Warnings: Dark!Rafe Cameron, NON-CON, Degradation, Slut-shaming, Fighting, Toxic relationship, Gaslighting, Possessiveness.
Summary: You wake up the next morning and remember what Topper and Rafe did to you. You avoid Rafe for days and he comes looking for answers. When you try to leave him he doesn't take it well and shows you that you can't leave him without consequences.
Banner by @straywords 🥀
Bang bang bang! The noise rattled through your home. A shiver ran down your spine. You covered your face with your covers, taking a deep breath.
"Open the door, babe!" Rafe yelled from the other side of the door. Even lying in your bedroom, you could hear the pain in his voice. You have been avoiding Rafe since the night of that party. You remembered what Rafe and Topper did to you. You could still feel Topper's fire-hot hands on your body; they felt like they had burned into your skin. The soreness between your legs took too long to fade. You threw the covers off and looked at your hips, bruised from the way Rafe held you so tightly when he fucked you.
Rafe rattled the door; he was pleading for you to open up and calling your name over and over. "Just open the door. Talk to me." Rafe's voice was heavy with anguish. You'd had enough of his pestering. Letting out a shaky sigh, you got out of bed on unsteady legs and went to open the door. You stopped in front of the door; the handle felt heavy in your hands, and you almost couldn’t open it.
One more loud bang rings through your ears. You flinched and slowly opened the door. Rafe stood tall, looking down at you. A little relief washed over his features when he saw you. Your heart felt heavy, and bile rose in your throat. You pushed it back down and just stared at the floor. You didn’t want to make eye contact with him. A heavy sigh pushed past his lips.
"Look at me," he said as he walked closer toward you. Your heart skipped a beat as you did, as you were told. "What?" You mutter, unable to say anything else. "What?" Rafe repeats and walks closer to you. "That’s all you want to say?" Rafe questions. "You've been avoiding me for days," Rafe's pleading eyes bare into yours.
"I think you know why, Rafe." You spit. You can feel your anger boiling under your skin. "Babe, what are you talking about?" Rafe's eyes don’t leave yours, and he raises his eyebrow in confusion. Your body shakes; you can’t believe Rafe is playing dumb right now. "You know what..." you pause. "You and Topper-" Rafe cuts you off quickly. "Me and Topper did what?" You start to see a crack in Rafe’s demeanor for a split second.
He closes the little space between you. You feel small because of Rafe’s looming height and intimidating stare. But you don’t back down and manage to get the words out. "You two raped me." You yell, not hiding the anger in your voice. Your heart is beating wildly in your chest. Something shifts in his eyes, and his eyebrows tick upward. Is he genuinely surprised? You can’t really tell. Rafe lets out a humorless chuckle.
"Rape? Nah, you got it all wrong." Rafe deflects. "No, don’t tell me I'm wrong. I know I was drunk and high, but it happened." Your shaky voice doesn’t hide the pain in your words. "Yeah, you were stupid drunk. I had to take care of you. You were all over me and Topper, like a real slut." Rafe points at his chest and pokes you in the dead center of your chest, making his words clear to you. "You wanted it, babe, and you loved it. Do you know how much I did that night to take care of you?" Rafe puts his hand on your face, stroking your cheek softly.
"That’s not true; I don’t remember wanting that, Rafe. I have bruises on my body and-." You're a little distracted by Rafe's overbearingness invading your space. "You couldn’t wait to feel my dick deep inside you; you wanted it rough. It was hot the way you were begging for it." A corner of Rafe’s lips lifts, forming a little smirk.
"Fuck you both, it's a crime; I should call the cops." Your words die in your throat as Rafe’s hand clings to your neck. "Cops? You really think they will do anything about a Pogue slut crying rape?" Rafe spits his words in your face. Your confidence starts to drain from your body, and you know Rafe is right. The murky details, the drinking, the coke? They wouldn’t do a damn thing. And going up against Kook royalty? Might be a death sentence.
"You really think my dad would let you accuse me of rape? Hell, Topper's Grandfather is a judge. Think again, sweetheart, it wouldn’t be a smart move." Rafe lets out a sinister chuckle that sends a chill down your spine. His grip becomes tighter around your neck.
"It would matter to me." you choke out, still trying to get a foot in this argument. Rafe almost lets out a belly laugh at your pitiful confession. "I’m what matters to you. You’re my girlfriend; I'm not going to let you spin a night of fun into something else just because you regret it now." You’re almost too stunned to speak. Rafe's innocent act is making you feel ill. You struggle out of his hold and push him backwards.
"Girlfriend? It’s safe to say that we are OVER Rafe, you're sick, and I want you out of my house now!" Your voice is sharp, and frustration drips from your words. You turn around, ready to get to your room and curl up in bed. You feel like you must burst into tears at any moment.
The wood floor creaks under heavy steps, and a steel arm wraps around your core, trapping you against a thick chest. Your feet are lifted off the ground, and you kick wildly, trying to escape Rafe’s iron grasp. You scream and kick, demanding that Rafe let you go. His free hand quickly wraps around your mouth, shutting you up.
Your terrified screams go unheard by Rafe as he drags you into your bedroom and kicks the door shut. "Stop fucking moving, damn!" Rafe cusses as he tosses you on the bed like you weigh nothing. Rafe quickly pins you to your bed. Your wrists are easily pinned above your head with one hand. At one point, you loved the way Rafe could easily overpower you; his strength was a strong point of attraction for you. But right now, it's making fear bubble deep in your lower stomach. Rafe is breathing heavily; your chest raises and falls, and you arch in his hold, desperate to break free.
Rafe runs his eyes over your body slowly, and you feel that fear burn your stomach again. "You don’t get to decide when this ends; don’t you fucking get it yet? You don’t make the decisions here." Rafe roars in your ear. "I know what you really need" Rafe rips your shorts and underwear down your shaky legs.
"You’re mine. You can’t leave me that easily, and you're threatening to call those pigs? Tsk, tsk, that's dumb even for you." Rafe runs his hand down your body stopping at the bruises he left. You flinch when his hand brushes over your clit. “Rafe, let me go; please, I'm sorry, I didn’t mean it". You lie. The tears spill from the corners of your eyes.
"You don’t get to say shit like that without facing consequences, love." You whine in his ear, and your head pushes harder into the bed. You sqeeze your eyes shut. You feel like screaming, but who would come to your rescue? Rafe gets to take what he wants from you again, and once again you feel paralyzed under Rafe’s dominant hold. Rafe settles between your legs, pulling his pants down enough for his cock to spring free.
"I was scared and mad; that’s why I said it. Let’s just talk." You try to reason with Rafe, but he ignores you. Rafe picks up your panties, and gives them a light inhale before stuffing them in your mouth. You can’t speak; you make helpless gargle noises. "You should have used your pretty little mouth to do what you are really good at, but you couldn’t shut the fuck up." You whine louder.
"Now I need to make you make sorry" Rafe rams into you without warning. You cry out, feeling Rafe stretch you wide. Rafe perks up at the sounds of your cries; it makes him want to fuck you harder. Rafe moans loudly, loving the feel of you wrapped around him.
"I love your tight pussy squeezing me; fuck, you feel so damn good." Rafe fucks into you roughly as he lets go of your wrists and brings his hands to your neck, which he squeezes tightly.
"You’re my fucking girl; I can’t live without this pussy; it’s mine forever." Rafe bucks against you; your slick coats his dick as he smoothly slides in and out of you. "You love your punishment, don’t you, Babygirl?" Rafe taunts you as he moves a hand to stoke your clit.
You try to shake your head; your cheeks burn with shame, while the rest of your body burns with arousal. "Like hell, you don’t? Your pussy is fucking soaked and begging for me to keep fucking your slutty little hole." Your body tightens as Rafe's breathing picks up, sending shivers down your spine.
You try to hide the way your body reacts to Rafe’s touch. Your mind feels muddled from the pleasure that's building. Your heart speed up and sounds like drums banging in your ears. Your body lets go without your permission. Rafe is all too satisfied to see you come apart on his cock. "I’m going to make you cum again and again till you fucking remember you belong to me."
#tw noncon#rafe cameron x reader#dark!rafe cameron#dark fic#obx fic#smut#outerbanks rafe#rafe outer banks#rafe fanfiction#non con#anon request#tw r4p3#18+
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