#what tf was i doing then wha | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

whateveriwant · 5 months

Note

Idk if you're taking requests, but here I am. Maybe TF 141 with an S/O who has ADHD and when going places, like a mall, for example they'll just completely walk away and they'll just loose their S/O

I took 'reader who is always walking away' and ran with it… ba dum tss (sorry, I had to). Anyway, I hope this is sorta what you were looking for! I was in a Christmas-y mood so all of these are winter/holiday themed!

Price

The park is especially busy for a Friday afternoon. There's children playing in the snow, daring youths having a go on the frozen lake, and families everywhere making memories to last a lifetime.

You've only been sitting on this bench for roughly a quarter of an hour before Price starts to squirm beside you, something clearly making him uncomfortable. Before you can even ask what it is, he's standing from the seat in one brisk motion.

“Be back in a moment, darling,” he grumbles. “The cold makes me need to piss like a stallion.”

As he takes off to find a place to relieve himself, all you can do is laugh and call after him to, “Wash your hands!”

Five minutes and one desecrated tree later, he emerges from the secluded thicket of bushes he found, zipping up his fly discreetly. He makes his way back to the bench you'd been seated at, a bit of a spring to his step… only to deflate once he discovers you’ve disappeared into thin air.

He sighs out loud – a long, drawn-out sound. He could say he's surprised but then he'd be lying. He knows you and your tendency to wander off; this is nothing new to him. Now it's just a matter of finding you again… for the third time this week, he remarks internally.

He would try calling you but he already knows you forgot your phone at home. He's got to get better about reminding you to take it with you whenever you leave the house, especially if he's constantly having to chase after you like you're some sort of loose gerbil.

Thankfully, he sees a set of footprints which he believes to be yours leading away from the bench. So, with no better clues to guide him, he decides to follow after the tracks, hoping they'll lead him right to you.

It's not long into it that he hears a sound in the distance, sort of a low, pleasant humming that grows stronger the closer he gets. It's only a minute or two later when – eureka! – he finds you standing with a small crowd who've gathered to listen to a group of carolers.

Ahh, of course. He should've known. You just can't resist a good live performance. Like a siren calling to you in a storm, one way or another, you'll always find your way to them.

Price easily sidles up next to you, flashing a smile when you briefly turn to take notice of him. His hand finds the small of your back as he joins you in listening, enjoying the festive songs performed by the carolers.

You're standing for a while, attention fully drawn to the singers ahead, when at some point you lean into Price’s ear, your voice lowered to a whisper.

“You washed your hands?” Your question is earnest, if not a little playful.

In response, and with a tone most firm, he declares simply, “...Yep.” Though, the way his hand slips from your back and into his coat pocket reeks of something awfully similar to guilt.

Ghost

You're on your 15th row when you spot it. There, standing not quite two and a half meters tall, perfectly green and dense and conical: your Christmas tree for the year.

An excited squeal leaves your lips and you swiftly run up to the tree to admire its beauty. “This is it! This is the one! Oh, isn't it just perfect?” you say reverently.

“Hold on a minute, love,” Ghost tries to rein you in as he lags a bit further behind. “Isn't that wha' you said about the one a few rows back? Wha' about that one?”

Oh yeah! You forgot all about that tree!

Well, now that he's reminded you, you want to do a little comparison. You tell him to stay put and guard this one while you quickly run back to check out that other one.

Two, five, nearly ten minutes pass and you haven't returned, much to Ghost’s chagrin. He thinks his bollocks must’ve shrunk three sizes by now from how long he's been standing out in this freezing cold.

After a dozen or so minutes, he tries ringing you, just to make sure everything’s alright. When there's no answer on the other end, he tries again, but is met with the same silence that has a streak of alarm bolting up his spine.

Ghost has always been a worrywart when it comes to his loved ones, and that concern only amplifies when it comes to large crowds and even larger spaces.

What's taking so long? Where have you gone? Are you lost? Hurt? Something worse? His mind begins to spiral.

Fuck it, he decides, and abandons the tree in order to seek you out. As he searches, row after row yields nothing but strangers and snow-capped firs. By now he's starting to fully panic, running around like a maniac, drawing the eyes of everyone in the lot as he yells out your name.

When he finally runs into you again – literally runs into you – he's out of breath, his heart pounding, and he grabs your shoulders with his strong hands and nearly shakes you out of your knitted cap.

“Don't scare me like that!” he's more exasperated than angry, and he pulls you into a bone-crushing hug. “Thought somethin’ might've happened to you,” he confesses, holding you to his chest like he thinks you'll evaporate if he lets go.

“M’sorry,” you mumble into the wall of hard muscle. “Got distracted.” The excuse is as weak as your skeleton feels beneath his embrace.

Distracted? What could have possibly distracted you enough that you didn't hear him screaming your name?

You pull back just enough to look at him, a sad curl to your lip that he can tell is forced. “I saw the cutest French bulldog,” you say, and Ghost has the audacity to scoff. “No, really! He was wearing the most adorable little Christmas jumper, and his name was Bark-tholomew. Bark-tholomew!” you stress.

Now that he knows you're safe and sound, Ghost loosens his hold on you, closing his eyes as he feels his pulse begin to slow.

“I asked the owners for a picture. Do you wanna see him?” you add hopefully.

When Ghost opens his eyes again, he's met with that sweet look on your face – that one he's unable to resist. He holds his breath for a beat or two, before letting out a deep, resonating sigh. “...Yeah, alright. Let's see it.”

Soap

It's unsurprising to find the mall jam-packed the week before Christmas, but that doesn't mean Soap isn't still annoyed by the swarm of bodies. But that's what he gets for waiting so long to go holiday shopping. Curse those last-minute deals and his inability to pass them up!

However, rather than wandering aimlessly through the mall, Soap has a game plan for today's spree. He knows exactly what stores he wants to hit, in the order he wants to hit them. And with you following closely behind to help, he's sure it'll be no sweat.

The first shop is easy enough to navigate with you trailing after him – providing your input when he inquires, and holding his items for him once he picks the one he wants. The second shop is much the same and the third even easier.

It's on the way to the fourth where, too caught up in his lists, Soap doesn't notice as you divert from the path, something else much more appealing stealing your attention away. It isn't until he's trying to decide between the last remaining pairs of snowmen or gingerbread men socks that he turns to ask your opinion, only to find you nowhere in sight.

He peers around the store for a second, not spotting you anywhere, before he suddenly feels his phone vibrating in his pocket. Your picture flashes across his screen and when he answers, the first question out of your mouth is, “Where are you?”

Where is he? Where are you? You were supposed to be following him, he not-so-subtly reminds you.

“I'm by the Cinnabon,” you tell him, then make a sound like you're taking a sip of something. “They've got hot chocolate. Giving out free cups of it,” you say, and that has Soap's ears instantly perking up.

Oh. So that's what had you scurrying off in his time of need. Honestly though, he can't say he'd have done any differently if he had caught scent of it like you did.

His movements falter for a beat, slowly lowering both pairs of socks in his hands. “Get me a cup, will ya?”

“Sorry. Can't.”

‘Can't’?! Well, why not?

You inform him that they're only giving out one per person and they seem to be running a pretty tight ship, so it's not like you could sneak another under the radar. And that makes sense, he supposes. They want everyone to have a chance to enjoy some.

“But that's why I called,” you continue. “It looks like they're almost out. So if you want one, you gotta come quick.”

The sudden deadline has Soap's eyes darting down to the themed socks in his hands. If he leaves now, they'll no doubt be snatched up by someone else. But the prospect of a cup of hot chocolate is equally as tempting, if not more so.

After debating with himself for about half a second, he asks, “…Where’d ye say ye were again?” as he places the hangers back on their racks. “By the Cinnabon. Right.” He makes his way to the front of the store, moving as quickly as possible. “Wait there,” he tells you, and once he's out the door, he's running full speed, his shopping bags swinging violently in his hands. “I'm comin’!”

Gaz

The night before Christmas seemed as good a night as any to take a walk around the neighborhood. So once you and Gaz had bundled up all nice and warm, you went for a stroll around the block, heading wherever your feet decided to take you.

Over an hour later, you're both just enjoying the evening – giving cheerful greetings to passing neighbors, turning down unexplored streets as you try to soak in this gorgeous night.

It's as you come up to another fork in the road that Gaz suddenly realizes one of his shoes is untied. He stoops to tie the laces, eyes cast down in his concentration, and as he does, you continue walking ahead, completely unaware that you're leaving him behind.

By the time he's finished and stands up again, you've vanished into the middle of this unfamiliar neighborhood.

Damn it. There you've gone and done it again. He knew he should have invested in one of the backpack leash things you see parents try to wrangle their wayward kids in.

You’d both left your phones at home in order to try to fully immerse yourself in this experience, so now he's forced to go old school when it comes to finding you.

He knows you couldn't have gotten very far; it's only a matter of if you went one way or the other. He picks a direction at random and after walking for a moment, he comes across a passerby whom he asks if they've seen someone matching your description. When they say they haven't, he then doubles back, repeating the process in the opposite direction.

Before long, thankfully, Gaz thinks he spots you stopped in front of a house not too far in the distance. He jogs up to where you're standing, and when he comes within earshot, he jokes, “Need to get you a bell or something, hun.”

Though the joke was lame at best, you don't react to it at all; don't even seem to hear it, honestly, which is likely given how distracted you currently are.

Your focus is entirely drawn to the house before you, your back to the street as you stare up at the brick facade. The house is stunning, absolutely covered top to bottom in all sorts of Christmas lights and decorations. It's by far the best display you've seen all year, and a breath of pure amazement leaves your lips as you take it in.

“Wow…” The word clouds the chilled air with a light puff of smoke. “Isn't it beautiful?” your awe bleeds into your voice, making it gentle, dreamy, like a sweet bell ringing in his ears.

Your tone has Gaz turning to face you, watching how you marvel at the way the lights twinkle and shine. A kaleidoscope of colors reflect off your skin, and an almost angelic glow seems to radiate from within you the longer he looks.

As he admires you, Gaz can't help how a smile slowly overtakes his face. With his eyes still trained on you, he takes your hand with his, and speaks softly, almost in a whisper, “Yeah… beautiful.”

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lizlovestofangirl · 2 months

Note

have you ever considered a coquette! gf and luke 👉🏻👈🏻 teeheeeee 🌷🎀🤍 ur smaus give me a purpose in life and a will to live 🥹

"my good looking boy"

luke castellan x daughterofaphrodite!coquette!reader

smau - luke loves his girl so much he lets her walk him like a dog (but coquettley )

🎧 - good looking by suki waterhouse

a/n: ahhhh i love this request! (btw u give me a will to live) i can just picture luke being difficult with everyone else and then letting his girl put bows in his hair and like him sleeping in her fancy pink bed AHHHH IM DYING (also percabeth is PERCABETHING in this)

*possible swearing and suggestive content, not checked so there could be mistakes*

--------------------------------------------------------

liked by silenaaaa, iamchrisrodriguez, and others

yn_yln he loves bows now

tagged itslukecastellan

view comments:

larueclarisse LMAO U HAVE HIM WHIPPED

yn_yln 🐕‍🦺

iamchrisrodriguez LMFAOOOOO

_groverunderwood yikes luke you just got called a dam dog

percy.jackson me personally id never take that

whosannabeth yes you would

percy.jackson yes i would

itslukecastellan and im the whipped one??

percy.jackson stfu

larueclarisse marry me??? 💍

yn_yln I DO

itslukecastellan what 🙂

silenaaaa SO CUTE Y/N

yn_yln YOU SEL

itslukecastellan i ❤️ my gf

yn_yln i ❤️ my bf

silenaaaa I CANNOT W THIS I LOVE LOVE

itslukecastellan where are my photo creds for the first picture????

yn_yln photo credits for the first picture go to this little shit head

whosannabeth @percy.jackson you'd take that too shithead

percy.jackson yeah...

yn_yln 🐕‍🦺

_groverunderwood that dam bow

yn_yln still concerned about the timing of this original joke

percy.jackson @itslukecastellan wheres ur dignity man

itslukecastellan 🤷

whosannabeth IGNORE PERCY THIS IS THE CUTEST THING IVE EVER SEEN

yn_yln i ❤️ my annabeth

itslukecastellan i thought you ❤️ me?

yn_yln know your place pretty boy

rachel.edare coquette bf

yn_yln duh gotta match the aesthetic

hi_imtyson 🎀

yn_yln MISS YOU TYSON

larueclarisse where can i get one of those shirts?

iamchrisrodriguez please dont answer that

yn_yln i'll send you the link 😘

iamchrisrodriguez shit

liked by whosannabeth, clarisselarue, and others

itslukecastellan she thinks im pretty (ft. this week's flowers)

tagged yn_yln

view comments:

iamchrisrodriguez STOP UR KILLING MY RELATIONSHIP

itslukecastellan just do better chris

yn_yln yeah be like luke (this is the only time you will ever hear this advice from anyone)

larueclarisse hello is want flowers too???!?!??

yn_yln lmao

silenaaaa where do u find one of this kind

yn_yln the pound go for the ones w daddy AND mommy issues

itslukecastellan jesus y/n

yn_yln 😊😊

percy.jackson ur ugly

itslukecastellan ur uglier

percy.jackson nuh uh

itslukecastellan yuh huh

percy.jackson nuh uh

itslukecastellan yuh huh

whosannabeth ignore percy. again.

itslukecastellan ive gotten very good at it

larueclarisse REAL

iamchrisrodriguez not real clar he pisses u tf off

larueclarisse 💐???

_groverunderwood those dam bows again

percy.jackson HAHAHAAHA

yn_yln pretty sure thats a laugh of trauma

itslukecastellan quit grover

yn_yln i love you

itslukecastellan is love you more

yn_yln WHERE ARE MY PHOTO CREDS FOR THE SECOND PICTURE??? HMMM???

itslukecastellan this little rat took the second photo

rachel.edare 🐕‍🦺

itslukecastellan i hate you 🙂

yn_yln's story

view reply from percy.jackson:

percy.jackson im holding this against him forever

yn_yln good pls do

view reply from itslukecastellan:

itslukecastellan youre lucky i love you or else i would not let you expose me like this

yn_yln love you too castellan

view reply from larueclarisse:

larueclarisse IM CRYING

larueclarisse YOU SHOULDVE SEEN THE LOOK ON HIS AND CHRIS'S FACES WHEN THEY SAW THIS

larueclarisse LUKE TURNED EVERY SHADE OF RED AND CHRIS LOOKED LIKE HE MIGHT SHIT A BRICK

yn_yln LMAOOOO

view reply from silenaaaa:

silenaaaa y/n you cant have other campers in our cabin

yn_yln but you love love

silenaaaa fair

silenaaaa wait

silenaaaa wait what kind of love 😏

yn_yln JEEZ NOT THAT KIND

yn_yln just posted a story

view reply from itslukecastellan:

itslukecastellan im blushingggg

yn_yln good

view reply from iamchrisrodriguez:

iamchrisrodriguez Y/N STOPPPP

yn_yln no

view reply from whosannabeth:

whosannabeth how much do u think i'll have to pay percy to do this?

yn_yln nothing hed do anything for u

whosannabeth oh wait true

#luke castellan pjo #percy jackson #percy jackson smau #pjo smau #smau #luke castellan #luke castellan fluff #luke castellan imagine #luke castellan smau #luke castellan x reader #luke castellan x yn #luke castellan x aphrodite!reader #luke castellan x you #luke castellan x coquette!reader #percy jackson and the olympians

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p1nkshield · 11 months

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Jason: [waking with up with suspicious weight on chest] wha-? WHAT TF GET OFF OF ME YOU LITTLE RAT!

Damian: [literally standing on him] wake up Todd, I require your hulking, brutish frame.

Jason: You are really bad at asking for help.

Damian: Father has confiscated my Cheese Viking cartridge and, using my stature to his advantage has placed it on a shelf I cannot reach.

Jason: Climb up there yourself it’s the middle of the night, only Tim will notice.

Damian: You underestimate Father. He has implemented a system that will alarm him if any sort of abnormal weight is placed on the shelving.

Jason: Ask Dick or something.

Damian: he far is too short.

Jason: [snickers a little]

Damian: you are the only one who can do this Todd.

Jason: Fine! Fine! Get off of me first knife child.

#batfam #jason todd #damian wayne #incorrect batfamily quotes #dc #tim drake #dick grayson #bruce wayne #Damian and his cheese game #he lost him game privileges bc he tried to fight Tim again #They both underestimated Bruce #there was a weight sensor under the cartridge #boom both of them lost Batmobile weapons use privileges

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sodium-h · 16 days

Text

SO.

I'm waiting a fic (supernatural) and to get more in touch with my characters personalities I like to write little funny dialogs, like incorrect quotes. You know, just to get a feeling on how they would react to some words and some of this are so funny that I just HAVE TO share them.

So now you get supernatural incorrect quotes

(Putting y/n 'cause it's less confusing)

_____________

Y/n, randomly at 3 A.M.: would you love me enough to hunt me as a ghost?

Dean, just wanting to go back to sleep: I died like two times already and came back to you, I think you already know the answer

Y/n: Okay, but would you?

_____________

Y/n: So... did Jesus actually exist?

Cas: I cannot confirm nor deny this statement

Y/n: that sounds suspicious

Cas, looking terrified, memories coming to him: I'm not making this mistake again

_____________

Cas: So, have you always been religious or did you just start after knowing the whole thing?

Y/n: I'm...I'm still not religious?

Cas: But you tend to say "whoever's up there" when you're in trouble?

Y/n: Oh I just like to keep my options open. Until I was 20 I used to say "little bitch from hell"

_____________

Y/n: alright, take your waterguns and meet me at my car

Sam, confused: we don't have water guns?

Y/n: wha-? You don't have waterguns filled with holy water? How tf are you still alive?!

_____________

Y/n: why don't you just say Christo to know if it's a demon instead of going around wetting people?

Dean: OMG I forgot about that

_____________

Y/n: *hugging Dean tightly*

Dean: you're robbing me

Y/n: of your heart?

Dean: I can feel your hand grabbing my wallet

_____________

Y/n's sister meeting Dean for the first time: So, you're just this?

Dean: What do you mean "just this" I'm alive, it's more that you could ask for from me

_____________

Y/n: Oh yeah, did I not tell you I was searched for arson?

Sam: Wtf?! No you didn't!

Y/n: Oh. Well it's fine I look way different than when I was twelve

Dean: YOU WERE TWELVE?!

_____________

Dean: It's really not that bad, I mean, how many times have you died

Y/n and their brother: zero?!

Sam, looking at Dean: I mean, that's a normal amount

Y/n: There should not be a normal amount?!

#supernatural #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel #castiel novak #supernatural x reader #dean winchester x reader #sam winchester x reader #castiel x reader #supernatural fic #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural incorrect quotes

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tryingtofindava · 6 months

Note

eyeless jack dating headcanons pls :)

𝐃𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐄𝐲𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬*ೃ༄

: ̗̀➛Back to source

He broke into your apartment with the intentions of harvesting your organs.

When he held the scalpel to your hip, and you began to stir awake. Mf froze.

Oh shit.

“What the fuck?”

Now bro only kills to eat, and when he does, he make sure it’s as painless for the victim as possible (unless he’s in a frenzy).

And That so called victim being awake? That just makes it 100x harder to get the task done.

And when you wake up to see a 6’6 man with an oddly terrifying blue mask holding a scalpel to your hip?

You (rightfully) freak tf out.

He’s not a sadist like some ppl… (cough Jeff Cough) So he probably awkwardly retreated back out to your window.

Anywayssss.

To the actual dating headcanons now.

You guys probably had a longgggggg ass slow burn. (not the only thing that’s long…)

The two of you definitely acted like a couple, before you were ACTUALLY a couple iykwim.

You find it so cool that your bfs a demon. He doesn’t really understand your excitement about it, since it’s literally a curse for him.

This boy is a walking furnace, he’s so cozy. So lots of winter cuddle sessions. Also perfect for when you on your period.

He purrs in his sleep. You can’t change my mind. You guys be cuddling on the couch all cute n’ shit and then there’s this soft buzzing sound… You crack open your eyes to look at him. His head on your lap as he naps.

“Babe… Are you purring?”

You asked with the biggest grin ever.

“…No.”

He likes when you read to him, he struggles to see (ik ik, he’s eyeless n shit, but I like to think he can still see, it’s js rlly rlly blurry or he has that heat vision where he can see body temps.) So when you can’t read to him, he just listens to audio books.

He’s a gentle giant towards you, y’all literally so cute. AND A GENTLEMAN🤭 he’s the whole damn package (minus the whole… cannibal eating ppl thing.)

He has animalistic like senses. So he can hear, and smell very well. So he can smell when you change your perfume or shampoo.

Imagine him leaning down to hug you (since you’re prob shorter than this tall ahh mf, nah seriously use the Hikaku sitatter site) and his face is buried in the crook of your neck. He’ll say shit like-

“Did you change you’re perfume to Miss Dior Eau De Parfum 30ml?”

“Wha-“

When he started getting comfortable taking his mask off around you, everytime he does you call him ‘Pretty boy’ 🤭.

HE WILL FOLD. Partially bcs he likes getting praised. Partially bcs he’s not a fan of the whole demon look.

His morning voice is literally so sexy help. Frothing at the mouth, on my knees barking.

Yk when you have like a sore head, and then you ask Google what’s up and Google’s all like ‘lol bitch you’re gonna die.’ You ask him about it obviously freaked out and he had to reassure your fine.

Walks in the rain at like 4am.

Every time he sees you, he’ll give you a quick forehead kiss.

Pls pls pls pls pls pls pls, I’m begging you. On my knees and begging for you to not look inside his mini fridge he has sitting in your storage room. Thank u.

He’s got some pretty gnarly things in there. Just be thankful he has the decency to not cross contaminate that shit with your food.

You guys slow dance in the kitchen to Mitski. He spins you around and all that cute shit.

He’s overprotective of you, and when you do get him to come out in public with you, he will growl at anyone that gets a little too close for his likings.

Wearing his hoodie<3. It just makes his dead heart happy.

SASSY MAN APOCALYPSE‼️💯💥

He may seem all quiet and sweet. But he’s sassy af. This. Dude. Has. Attitude.

When you’re telling him to do something in a tone, he’ll mouth you’re words with his hands.

When you guys are cuddling in your bed at night, he’ll randomly nibble on your neck to shoulder. He has sharp ass teeth so it’s a bit nippy, but he makes sure to be extra careful to not draw blood.

He smothers you when you’re under the weather. He’s literally so sweet omfg.

When you guys argue which is like 10% of the time, it takes awhile for him to get agitated. But even when he does he will NEVER raise his hands to you. Other than that he keeps calm.

He will though, get a bit mean, he probably doesn’t mean what he says it’s just a defence mechanism.

He makes it up to you with a cute little gift basket (he stole it.)

Y’all have probably kissed, and he still had the taste of blood in his mouth from eating someone’s kidneys<3

He can’t steal your organs but he can deffo rearrange them ;)

✯.★*°•.°✯•.★*°°·.•°★•✯.★*°•.°✯•.★*°°·.•°★•

#creepypasta x reader #eyeless jack #eyeless jack x reader #eyeless jack x y/n #eyeless Jack headcanon #creepypasta reader #creepypasta headcanon #creepy pasta x reader hc #creepypasta #creepypasta hcs #creepypasta x female reader #creepypasta x you #eyeless jack headcanon

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whyse7vn · 3 months

Text

MISS YOU -

[ !fwb jhs pjm ksj jjk kth x reader ]

HOSEOK -

hobi: hi

y/n: ur texting me before 5pm should i be scared rn….

hobi: i miss you

y/n: oh i’m terrified

hobi: can’t a man simply miss his girl???

y/n: i’m shaking in my boots dni

and ur girl???

shut the hell up

hobi: i miss you

y/n: STOP

this is really weird

hobi: ok i’m never being nice again

y/n: 💜

hobi: i lied i’m just a nice guy at heart

i miss you my pretty little petal 💘

y/n: this is a new low for you hoseok

hobi: i told you about saying my name

i’m trying to be sweet to u rn

not horny

y/n: our relationship is literally built on being horny wtf are you talking about

hobi: do you miss me

say yes if yes and no if yes

y/n: ok that is real unfair

hobi: yes or no

no jungkook

y/n: speaking to you before 5pm truly feels illegal

hobi: i talk to you before 5pm

like all the time

don’t make me look bad rn

we literally work together

i talk to you all the time???????????

y/n: u sound like ur trying to convince urself you talk to me

hobi: I LITERALLY DO STOP LYING

y/n: ok yeah you do but you only message me to fuck after 5pm

hobi: i never said i wanted to fuck?????

y/n: so you don’t want to fuck??

hobi: ok yes

y/n: knew it

hobi: yeah whatever

BUT

i just thought i would try and be a sweet loving man for u

y/n: well don’t do it again

freaked me the hell out

hobi: u wanna be my girlfriend so bad i’m gonna throw up

y/n: ???????????

hobi: ok sorry

y/n: freak

hobi: miss ur pussy on my face

y/n: i’m literally blocking you

ur so gross

hobi: ok wtf

how do i win in this life

cant be sweet

cant be explicit

HOW DO I WIN

y/n: ask to fuck nicely

hobi: may i please indulge in the sexual intercourse with you at 1400 hours

y/n: and normally

hobi: can we fuck in like 20 minutes

in my studio preferably

pls and thanks 😝

y/n: sure

hobi: TURN UPPP

that was really easy

y/n: did you just call me easy?????????

hobi: NO??????

y/n: you definitely did

hobi: NONONONO

i’m just saying like normally i’d have to beg a little

ur kind of a sadist like that

anyways

you didn’t make me beg today

dare i say

dot dot dot

ur stating to fall in love with me wink

y/n: did you just type out dot dot dot and wink???

hobi: say yes if yes and no if yes

y/n: stop breathing

hobi: hard

and no not by shinee

this one is by hoseok

but WAIT

(no dino)

if we think about it is by you

hard by you

wink lol

y/n: ur so fucking lame it’s unreal

JIMIN -

jimin: miss you

wanna kiss you so bad

y/n: personally i wanna fuck

jimin: …

is it really that hard to act like you were loved as a child for even a little bit

y/n: all i’m hearing rn is you don’t want to fuck

ur LAME

jimin: do you not miss me back?

y/n: next question

jimin: do you miss me???

y/n: purple

pull ur dick out

jimin: i’m getting real upset

what if i cry rn

y/n: lowkey

jimin: stop talking

y/n: it WOULD be real hot

jimin: …

i’m trying to be cute and love on u rn

y/n: gross

love on ur girlfriend or something

jimin: ur my girlfriend

y/n: i’m ur girl friend you fuck sometimes

the big space was on purpose btw

if you didn’t get that

jimin: ok fuck????

i get it

so like do you fr not miss me back or what?

y/n: for someone who said they get it ur not acting like you get it

jimin: i get it

y/n: get a guitar

jimin: what

y/n: riize

jimin: rise?

y/n: talk saxy

jimin: tf are u talking about

y/n: ur so annoying

jimin: can you say you miss me back

y/n: no!

jimin: i’m gonna stop fucking you

y/n: ok

jimin: ok i lied but were you scared for a second

y/n: not really

jimin: ok idc

y/n: who is ur riize bais

mine is shotaro

he’s a real cuite

jimin: mine is i miss you jimin

y/n: i’m not saying i miss you

jimin: why not?

y/n: why?

jimin: because you miss me???

y/n: i saw you last week??

jimin: LAST WEEK

oh my chest hurts

the walls are caving in

y/n: are you done

jimin: should we just make it official

y/n: if ur this annoying and a fuck buddy i don’t even want to imagine what ur like as a boyfriend

jimin: better

y/n: i doubt that!

jimin: let’s find out challenge go!!!!

y/n: i do NOT consent

jimin: hello girlfriend do you miss me like i miss you????????

y/n: i’m gonna start fucking joon

jimin: say sike

that’s not funny at ALL

say sike rn

HELLO???????????????

SAY SIKE Y/N

IM SO FR SAY SIKE

SEOKJIN -

jin: miss you

y/n: ☠️☠️☠️☠️

just send that to jimin

he’s laughing at you

jin: wtf is ur problem

y/n: why are you messaging me during works hours??

jin: cuz i missed you???

yeah i said missed

not miss

cuz fuck you

you made me look weak in front of jimin

you bitch

y/n: what if i said i missed you too?

jin: ofc you miss me

that was a given

i was just letting you know the feeling was mutual

y/n: that’s crazy cuz i don’t miss you at all

jin: ????

are you proposing to me rn?

y/n: ?get a grip

jin: need you here rn

y/n: i’m trying to work

jin: ok?? idk what that has to do with anything

y/n: i’m working

jin: are we role playing??

y/n: no.

jin: omg i was just kidding lighten up a bit geez

pretty girl i miss you

no even joking

y/n: pic with tears or ur lying

jin: you make missing you not fun at all

y/n: is missing ur fuck buddy supposed to be fun??

jin: we’re still calling it that?

y/n: ??

jin: it’s fine

i’ll indulge you and ur games

y/n: LMAOOO ???

ur age is really showing

talking like a fucking vampire

jin: yeah yeah

what time do you finish

y/n: in exactly an hour

jin: i’ll pick you up

will bring the nice car and everything

y/n: all ur cars are nice

jin: i know

just wanted to hear you say it

y/n: eat the rich i say!

jin: i’ll let you eat me

let’s go bite for bite

y/n: jimin would have a field day with that

jin: i don’t want to talk about jimin while i’m seducing you thank you very much

y/n: ur seducing me??

jin: yeah

you couldn’t tell?

y/n: no?

jin: ur lying

y/n: maybe i am

jin: that’s what i thought

y/n: maybe i’m not

jin: you are

y/n: but what if i’m not

jin: no you are

y/n: am i?

jin: shut up

it’s like nice when you just don’t talk

and stop pretending you hate me

y/n: hate is a strong word

jin: so you love me?

y/n: love is a strong word

jin: fuck you

y/n: YOU WISH

jin: not true

y/n: IS THAT YOU OUTSIDE??????

WAVE IF THATS YOU

OH MYGOD YOU WAVED

THATS YOU

UR OUTSIDE

jin: i’m outside

y/n: ??????? HOW

jin: god knows

y/n: i said an hour

jin: an hour is too long dont you think :/

y/n: UGH

men

YOU MAKE ME SICK

give me 5

JUNGKOOK -

jk: come see me

y/n: ??LMAOOSODOFIDIFJFNDJJDJDJDJ SJDJDJDNDNDNDNNDNFNFNFNFNFNNDNDNFNFNFNFNFNFNFNNFNFNFNFNNFCJ

jk: ok i’m sorry i though you would find that really sexy and cool

y/n: that was really funny

imagined you saying that in real life LMSKDKKDF

THATS SO FUNNT WLMSKDODOFIFJFJFJFJFN

wow ur really silly

jk: i miss you

like so much

y/n: do you miss ME or do you miss fucking me

jk: is this a trick question?

y/n: not at all

jk: both?

y/n: are you sure

cuz you don’t sound sure

jk: it’s a trick question

y/n: i’m telling you it’s not

jk: if i say i miss fucking you ur gonna think i’m just using you for sex and that i’m horrible person that should die

but if i say i miss you ur gonna think i’m a stupid idiot loser who can’t control his feelings and should kill himself

y/n: is this u projecting rn??

jk: can i come over please

y/n: answer my question first

jk: i did !!!! i said both

y/n: you said

“both?”

jk: ok now i’m saying both!!!!

y/n: your just saying cuz you want to come over

so you miss fucking me

i see

jk: NO

well yes

bUT LIKE NOT JUST THAT I MISS YOu

LIKE YOU

as A PERSON

your smile

your voice

your like overall presence???

y/n: why is everything a question with you

stand on business kook

jk: you make me second guess everything

IM SO NERVOUS LEAVE ME ALONE

y/n: okay let’s not shout now

jk: ok i’m sorry

i’m really sorry

hey i’m sorry

y/n: guys i think he’s sorry

jk: guys??? who is there? don’t tell me it’s yoongi he’ll bully me

y/n: you want come over?

jk: so bad

y/n: ok

but you have to pay me in like

JUNGKOOK WHAT THE FUCK YOU JUST SENT ME 50K???/!/£:’dn

jk: you said pay

y/n: I DIDN’T FINISH MY SENTENCE??????

jk: oh

my fault

i’m sorry

i’m really sorry

you can keep it

for rainy day or something?????

carry on what were you saying??

i didn’t mean to interrupt

y/n wow ok um i was just gonna say tteokbokki or something

jk: with cheese right?

you like it with cheese yeah?

i’ll come over and make it for you i’ll head to the store rn

anything else???

y/n: ummm no

jk: ok i can start making my way right?

y/n: yeah…

jk: cool ok see you soon

y/n: cool

cool wow yeah cool

that’s cool

wtf just happened

TAEHYUNG -

14 miss calls from tae

tae: throbbing rn

y/n: it’s 3 am what the fuck is wrong with you

and throbbing?????????

you

nvm

i don’t even want to finish my sentence

jump of a bridge cut ur dick off idc leave me alone

tae: i miss you

y/n: no shit

tae: told my parents were engaged

y/n: convinced all you do all day is pop percs and take punches to the head

tae: you can give me head

i miss ur head

and you ig

but like ur head 😍

meow

y/n: meow???

tae: MEOWWWWWWWW

y/n: what do you want??

it’s 3 am

tae: head???

are you stupid

wasn’t i clear enough

ACTUALLY NO WAIT

i miss you🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

what did nct say that one time

girl your my favourite 😋😍💗

y/n: i should call mark

tae: OMG YEAH

you think he’ll sing a bit for us

GIRL UR MY FAVOURITEEEEE

wait no???????

wtf

don’t call mark

are you sick

are you out of ur mind

i just called you my favourite and now ur calling mark?????

y/n: puka puka pow pow 💚

tae: ok but i said i miss you

y/n: k

tae: me missing you

like that’s what’s happening rn

ME missing YOU

do you understand

y/n: yess thank you ur so kind !🌷💞💘

tae: ??????

say it back maybe

y/n: no thanks!

tae: okay lol

the more you deny my love

y/n: yuck

tae: ok never interrupt me again

or we WILL have issues

y/n: are you talking to me rn…

tae: NO LMAO WHAAAATTT i must of forgot where i was for a second why would i ever threaten my beautiful amazing queen

y/n: ok not too much

tae: love you!

y/n: ur making me sick gonna throw up

tae: i’ll catch it

with my hands

y/n: stop

tae: eat it if you want me too

y/n: you lack serious amounts of self respect and it’s extremely worrying

tae: will you give me head

y/n: only if you never speak ever again

tae: ohmygod literally call me ariel babe like you give me head and my voice box will literally melt out my body

NO WORDS

ever again NO JOKE

y/n: the way you lie so easily is kinda scary

tae: i’m not lying

okay I AM lying but like how am i supposed to call you at 3 am and beg you to come over if i can’t speak

y/n: that’s the point!

tae: ummmmm

that’s mean

like you would so miss my voice if i didn’t have one

y/n: if you didn’t have a voice how could i miss it if you never had one???

tae: what

y/n: like ur saying if you NEVER had i voice i would miss it

but i can’t miss it if i’ve never heard it before

tae: that logic is stupid cuz ur saying you can’t miss things you’ve never had

y/n: you can’t

tae: i miss our wedding night

y/n: shut up

tae: throbbing

you make me throb

THROBBING ❤️

y/n: shut up shut up shut UP

tae: totally random pov ur boyfriend calls you 700 times and messages you at 3 am telling you he’s throbbing and is offering himself to you on a silver plater fuck the the knife and fork he wants it messy

what you doing in that situation??

y/n: sending a swat team to his address

tae: i’m your boyfriend???

y/n: ?

tae: YOU BASICALLY SAID IM YOUR BOYFRIEND

THIS IS A WIN

OH MY GOD A WIN

WIN WIN WIN WIN WIN

I WIN

OHMYGOD I WIN

i win

ohmYGODDDD

i would like to thank yeontan and my parents and hybe and son heung min for this win

i owe it all to you guys

i promise to keep working hard

and never let any of you down i’m just so extremely grateful

and i just wanna add that

SMS ERROR: The phone number you are trying to reach is no longer in service!

tae: gf so crazy like 🤭

—

yessss this was half a draft for the first fwb work i did so if you see any similarities that’s why but this is also half a request cuz somone asked me to make a fwb piece about them missing you but i lost the little ask thingy i’m so sorry don’t shoot me ALSO obviously all the members aren’t here cuz this was a scrap but then i was like omg this is too silly to throw away so i posted here hope you like >.<

tags: @piw6n @92jinnies @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @leleluvsbts @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @jazminethecreator @k4ngelz @jmnscutie @sopebubbles-replies @cynicalyoongs @lightningpussy54 @eunthv @gigiiiiislife @lowkeykin

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synthshenanigans · 9 months

Text

I am so normal about this upload yea I'm perfectly fine rn yep

#chonny jash #now i gotta stay up till 6am for uploads gah #anyway about the video:#1. songs like this always make me sad but i mean at least its upbeat?#2. WHA BROS DANCING AND ROCKIN THE FITS WHAT #this dude can pull off multiple outfits & hair styles and i cant even do ONE what tf #Discovering my Gender with Chonny Jash #i am so worried he was gonna fall off the chair tho #3. i thought it was just me or the last vid but his accent is more obvious in these which is cool #cos he's not playing a character he's himself #3. uhhhh suck my balls #4. these songs make me feel bad but also like CJ I've been here for about 9 months and love even the shit like the mario album #im stuck here for AWHILE and im gonna like the music no matter what not even I can make myself leave #im trapped hel p #i still feel bad tho #is that a parasocial thing? i hope not #im too much of a baby lol #okay moss is shutting up now #KJ don't know how to shut his damn mouth

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artemfication · 2 years

Text

Mammon and his crushing problems

Let’s be real here, he is an absolute simp for MC

He would quite literally kiss the ground they walk on

However…

Mans is too embarrassed to admit he fell in love with a human

Like he is literally the second most powerful of the seven sins, tf u mean simping for some dumb ass human???

Oh fuck they smiled at him, RUN!

poor MC takes that as a sign that he doesn’t like them

They didn’t expect for the seven brothers to like them at all, but it seems like even being near them is too embarrassing for the second born

“MC is not with us for breakfast?”

“Huh? Wdym MC isn’t there for breakfast?! They never miss out on breakfast, and here I thought we could do our make-up togethee!” Asmodeus is a bit confused.

“Do any of you happen to know about their whereabouts?”

“I did hear their door when I was making breakfast. Think it was around seven? They must’ve gone to school early.” Satan mumbles as he takes a bite from his sandwich.

“Strange…I see no need for them to go that early. Not that I’m complaining, but their grades look fine.”

Lucifer’s gaze turns to Mammon and he can already feel another scolding coming from the oldest.

“Don’ look at me, they didn’t tell me anythin’ this mornin’ so ya can’t blame me.”

“You’re right. I was suppose to assign someone else as MC made a request to swap you out for one of your brothers. Their preference was Beelzebub or Satan. Not to worry, I will seek them out at RAD. I have a hunch either the Angels or Solomon came to pick them up…perhaps Thirteen since they became quite close lately. It does make me wonder what made them want to change guardians, though they assured me it’s because they wanted to get to know the others better.”

Ouch…that hurt mammon’s teeny tiny heart

Wasn’t he enough for you?

Did he do something that pissed you off?

“I’m done with breakfast. I’ll go ahead. Mammon’s got the dishes right? I’ll go and seek out MC to accompany them until you’ve had your little talky talk.” Asmodeus quickly gets up and takes one last glance in the mirror before going out to make his way to RAD.

One by one the brothers leave the table until it’s just mammon and lucifer.

“You’ve been awfully quiet mammon”

“Wha- you wanna have me talkin’ all the time or what?”

“That’s not what I was implying, however, you seemed quite surprised and sad when you heard about the change in guardianship. Mind telling me if you did something anyway?”

“Argh, how am I suppose to know? I’m just glad I got them off my back-“

“Lucifer?”

Mammon freezes at the sound of your voice.

“You wanted to speak to me? I’m sorry for not attending breakfast, I was in the library to print out my assignment papers. I have a free period right now as the professor got sick. Asmodeus told me you wanted to talk to me so I came back as you were still here. Saves you a trip to seek me out.”

“How thoughtful of you MC. Yes, I did want to talk to you about the change of guardianship. Please follow me to my office.”

Mammon tries to talk to MC but they give him the cold shoulder and avoid his gaze like the plague.

He’s fucked up for good, hasn’t he?

For the rest of the day he has locked himself in his room, lying on his bed and staring at his screen which plays some random video about how to hack a gambling machine.

Did they hear him say those harsh words?

But he didn’t mean it…

Beelzebub calls for dinner, but mammon has no appetite.

How is he suppose to fix this?

His old self would’ve been happy to be free from that guardianship

But the him now has become so attached to that puny little human

He never wanted to admit it, but it is a fact.

He’s in love with you

But expressing such a thing is so hard

How does Asmodeus do this shit all the time?

Well…not like he’s ever confessed, but rather received confessions…

Mammon has had his fair share of confessions as well. But he never confessed himself.

Do humans and demons confess in the same ways?

He looks up how to confess on Deviltube, watches some human confession movie scenes, but he is none the wiser

A little while later he hears laughter from outside his door and he quietly walks towards the door the peek outside.

“…and so his mom exposed him at a family dinner, for dating all these girls, because she found out their names by accident and the poor guy had to sit through the embarrassment, it was so funny when I heard it!”

MC and Asmodeus are gossiping and giggling as they’re making their way to Asmo’s room

That sweet smile MC wears…

They never smiled at him like that

“Let me get you some cute accessories I recently bought, when I was back home! See if they match with your fit for tomorrow, yeah?”

MC walks to their own room to look through their vanity drawer and are too busy searching that they don’t hear mammon walk in, until he clears his throat

O-oi, human. Can we talk for a sec?”

“I don’t have any grimm on me and no you can’t sell my bathwater.”

“That’s not what I wanted to t-talk about. I-it’s about that guardianship…”

“You’re welcome. Was that it?”

Guilt is weighing heavy on his heart as he hears the slight hurt in their voice

“I don’t want a “you’re welcome”…I just wanted to know why…?”

“Because you’re obviously embarrassed of me. You always run away whenever I look at you. When I try to be nice, you run off. When I ask you a question, you insult me without missing a beat. I know you didn’t like me in the beginning, but what did I ever do for you to hate me so much? Is it because I’m human?”

“N…no, I swear on my Goldie, it ain’t you who’s the problem. It’s me, I’m the one being stupid. I never meant any of those insult towards ya. Ya gotta believe me MC! I-It’s just this stupid feelin’ I get whenever I’m near ya…ya make me feel kinda weird…”

“As in disgust?”

“Nah, nah, not disgust…it’s just…it feels nice…but it also makes me anxious, ya know what I mean?”

At this point mammon is redder than Lucifer’s eyes.

He can feel those beats of sweat drip down the sides of his face

C’mon ya stupid demon, just say your shit!

“I….uh….I…I like you, okay?!” He splutters, eyes closed and his fist balled, not daring to look MC in the eyes

They’re gonna reject him, aren’t they? Just like everyone else-

“Mammon a-are you sure…?”

“You’re ma human…I’m ya first man…I don’t want any of those others to become ya guardian…you’re my precious dumbass human…”

Would you reject this adorably tall, white haired, blushing, stuttering, avatar of Greed?

You must be stupid if you did.

“I’m sorry for being so mean to ya…I was just a lil’ scared of myself.”

The MC is too stunned to speak

“I-I get it if ya gonna reject me…but it was unfair of me to keep ya in the dark…I’m sorry…”

“You dumbass demon…why didn’t you say that earlier?!”

The mammon was too stunned to speak as MC’s arms have found their way around his waist.

“I’m not rejecting you, but you really need to stop doing stupid things…”

“I heard ya…”

Spoiler alert: He didn’t

Mans still gets flustered as hell whenever MC does something as mundane as asking him something or even just walking beside him!

He once passed out when receiving a scolding from Lucifer because MC held his hand

#obey me headcanons #obey me #obey me mammon #mammon x reader #obey me x reader #mammon is baby #protect this dumbass i beg

2K notes · View notes

sunshine-scented · 1 year

Note

Hehe Hello hello Can i request Wukong, Macaque and Mk ( platonic on Mk one, because Wanna make Reader being a mother to him )

A goddess Reader that's well Tf so gorgeous so handsome they can cook they can do anything so basically How they Thought and say like " Hm? Oh reader yeah i know him they blablabla " On reader just wanna seee i might love this one

Olso have a great day luv your Work And take a rest and drink a lot of water

- ✨ Yuzex ✨

Cute~ I've definitely heard about these type of concepts before, I'm glad I get to make one of them!

❀ Tell me more, don't be shy ❀

: Them talking about their s/o when asked, voice lines hc!

: Sun Wukong, Macaque, MK(platonic) x reader

: Fluff!!

Sun Wukong

About (Name); showing off

"You've met (Name) already? I mean, that's great and all but I was the first one to meet them so hah! What do you mean that it doesn't matter? Uh, duh? It's (Name)?? The best person you will ever meet in your entire life until you die???? Keep up bud"

About (Name); hidden secret

"Wh...what are you doing touching me like that? Huh? (Name) told you I liked scratches on my fur? Wha— ughhh, I told them to keep it a secrettt...whatever, you're not allowed to touch me, only (Name) is allowed in that, hmph"

About (Name); Adoring

"If there's one thing I absolute adore about (Name) that isn't them existing, it's them in general. No really, I mean it. I love how they make me feel better by just talking to me about the weather, I love how easy it is to be myself with them. I just love them so much you know? It's hard to explain but basically, if they were to disappear in this world, then I would flatten mountains, empty oceans, and flip the world upside down until I get them back into my arms."

About (Name); Facts

"Did you know (Name) liked that color in their shirts? I always see them wear those kind of clothes with that style. Oh! Those birds over there yeah? They think they're cute and often stare at them when they're zoning out. And that one over there? That's their favorite place to eat. Also— MPHH?! Ack- why did you cover my mouth all of the sudden?! Yeesh, have some respect, anyways, did you know that (Name) really liked those kind of shoes—"

Six eared Macaque

About (Name); first impressions

"To be completely honest, I didn't think I'd like them as much as I do now. I thought that they were just some ordinary being not worth my time, yet when they talked to me over and over again, suddenly, I felt rather...lonely whenever they're gone. Heh, how annoying of them♡"

About (Name); soft spots

"...You won't leave me alone until I tell you more about (Name) huh? You're lucky I like talking about them so much. However, if I did try talking about them more we'd be here until I decide to stop holding grudges..Huh? I'm going soft? You seriously just realized?"

About (Name); voice

"(Name) once told me that they found my voice soothing to listen to. I'll admit, it took me by surprise the first time they mentioned it, yet that boldness they showed at that moment was attractive of them. Telling me something I never knew people liked about me? And told by the one person you'd kill a whole nation for? Sends shivers down my spine"

About (Name); Sleep

"Knowing me, I never got a lot of sleep. And even if I did it's probably somewhere about 4 hours and then boom, a nightmare to haunt my life until I die. Twice. As cliche as it sounds, I sleep better when (Name) is with me. Something about their arms sharing their warmth into mine never fails to lull me to sleep. Perhaps it's also the fact that they sometimes hum small melodies or run their hands onto my hair to sooth me from whatever's on my mind. It's now mandatory that they stay with me everytime I'm going to sleep, hopefully they don't mind~"

About (Name); excitement

"Huh?! You know about (Name)?!?! That's so cool! (Name)'s so cool!!!! They're so nice and caring and amazing and caring and nice and caring you know? I want to grow up to be just as nice and caring and amazing and caring and caring and nice as them!"

About (Name); injuries

"Look! I'm a mummy! Hehehe I'm not actually one, it's just that I got into this hugee battle with a demon and the aftermath got me all these scars and bruises. (Name) was not happy, gosh, the look on their face when they wrapped bandages on my body while they gave me a whole hour long lecture was so..*shiver* remind me to take better care of myself please"

About (Name); snacks

"My bag is a little bit heavier than usual, maybe it's because of the multiple snacks (Name) keeps inside it. I mean, I'm not complaining, I like the snacks they give me. But a hero's gotta have agility too you know! How am I gonna heroically jump on buildings and beat demons with a heavy bag of super delicious extremely amazing and over the top golden snacks that (Name) gives me?"

About (Name); Lessons

"I think (Name) saw how stressed I am with this whole hero thing, first it was DBK, then spider queen, LDB and now this Asare Leon guy or whatever his name was. It's like I can't keep anything from them. Yet, they still treated me gently and talked to me about how everything happens for a reason, I'm living this life because I'm strong enough to live it. Honestly, I'm glad they told me this, if it weren't for them, I would have been eaten alive by some stinky demon, ewww"

I'm trying so hard not to make another Nezha fic it's literally mental torture

674 notes · View notes

novelcain · 1 year

Note

Thinking about that Wukong being “birthless” comment, I headcanon that Wukong thinks he simply just can’t have kids. Wukong is aware he’s not exactly normal, even in demon standards (being born from a stone egg that was formed from energy of both heaven and earth), and he just assumed he was sterile and also feels self conscious about it. Him and reader have a discussion about this early in the relationship, and reader assures him that she still wants to be with him. And then imagine reader telling Wukong that she’s pregnant, and Wukong going from shock to unbridled joy, picking her up and spinning her around before setting her down getting on his knees and kissing her tummy.

Wukong: ... What do you mean you're pregnant?

Reader: I mean... I'm pregnant?

Wukong:

Reader:

Wukong: YOU CHEATED ON ME!!!!????

Reader: WHAT NO! YOU'RE THE ONLY PERSON I'VE BEEN SLEEPING WITH YOU DUMBASS! AND IT'S NOT LIKE YOU USE PROTECTION!

Wukong: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!?!?! I KNOW YOU CHEATED!!! I CAN'T HAVE KIDS!!!

Reader:

Wukong:

Reader:

Wukong: Wha—

Reader: WHY TF WOULD YOU THINK YOU COULDN'T HAVE KIDS!!!!!???????

Wukong: I—

#sun wukong needs his head checked to make sure he was born with fucking brain #turns out it's just his staff rattling around in there #skittle answers #isekai'd to the west #isekai'd to the west skit #jttw sun wukong x reader #sun wukong x reader #wukong x reader #monkey king x reader #journey to the west x reader #jttw x reader

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lemmetreatya · 1 year

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Hey Mun! Not sure how many characters you take but can you do headcanons of turn ons and turn offs for Geto Gojo Toji and Nanami? Bless 🙏🏻

wgw1!! idk if this req was actually meant for me or nawt but why tf not!! lool lets get into it!

JJK MEN HEADCANONS: TURN ONS AND OFFS

ft. Geto, Gojo, Toji and Nanami (ft. Megumi)

contents: modern au, strong language, slight glimpses of gaslighting idk

Geto

Turn OFFs:

Dislikes strong smells!! deffo think he’d be one to faux gag if something even vaguely annoyed his senses (he can be so childish at times lol).

doesnt even have to be a bad smell, it could literally be perfume

He refuses to say its sensory overload, which you’d even be able to accustom and understand better, but no he literally just… doesn’t like it

“Eurk! Wha’ the fu’k?!”

Geto loudly makes a display of gaging as the two of you were sat on the train. With a face of surprise, you look at Geto with annoyance.

“Really?! In public?!” You hissed.

The man only held his nose as he sideeyes the lady that just passed him by. Subtly sniffing yourself, you scoff at Geto’s reaction.

“The perfume didn’t even smell that bad. It was kinda nice even.”

Geto disregarded your comment by making even a bigger heaving sound.

“It’s infiltrating my fucking nose, oh my god.

You had to look away with a sigh. He really could be dramatic sometimes.

He gets turned off when a significant other asks for his opinion and does the exact opposite. he says it’s a waste of his ‘sacred wisdom he chose to bestow upon you’

especially if its to make a decision they’ve been pondering on for time. if they do or pick the other option, he feels like his opinion is so bad that in giving the wrong answer, the person chose the right one !!

it gives him a very phat inferiority complex but he wont admit it so anytime he sees it he’s like RedFlagRedFlagRedFlag 😭😭

Turn ONs:

he gets turned on when a significant other plays with his ears.

its kinda weird because he’s very particular about who touches him and its a part of him that normally people would look at in wonder but not go out of their way to ask to touch because he’d probably say no

and in all honesty, he would dsodjsj but if you’re both laid up with each other and you subconsciously do it, he won’t complain

he secretly loves the stimulation of it

With his head laid up in your lap, Geto’s eyes were glued to the screen.

He was so adamant to watch this documentary and you had absolutely no interest or intention in watching it with him. Yet surprisingly, you found yourself rather interested in the topic of discussion and so ended up sitting with him.

Subconsciously, your hand stroked down from the crown of Geto’s head to the shell of his ears, your fingers aimlessly fiddling with the soft flesh.

Geto hadn’t voiced anything about it so you didn’t realise for awhile, but when you noticed it was his ears you were touching, you made a short ‘ooh’ sound before retracting your hand.

“What? What happened?” Geto used his arm to sit up and look back at you, eyes beady as he made sure everything was okay.

You quickly shook your head.

“No, its nothing. I just realised I was touching your ear and I didn’t mean to. Sorry.”

Rolling his eyes, Geto only lowered himself back onto your lap with a huff. He gingerly wormed himself back into a comfortable position as his eyes were already trained back onto the TV.

“I thought it was something serious.” He mumbles.

Oh he loves intelligent conversations — this doesn’t mean the content of the conversation has to be strictly complicated or about something big brained. it could simply be something you’re both passionate about and therefore can talk in great depth about

he loves being able to have bartering points and see different perspectives or discover new possibilities together with someone who knows what they’re talking about!!

Gojo

Turn OFFs:

Excessive swearing

Gojo’s own mouth isn’t the cleanest in the book, but he hates when there’s just too much bad language flying around

In his words: “It disturbs the Holy Spirit in me.”

“And I swear to God! If you ever touch my fucking wife ever again, I promise you I’ll fuck your shit up so bad, you’ll fucking wish you were pissing out your own’s mother’s cunt!”

You were practically on the edge of your seat at the confrontation scene that was going down. The movie had built the climax up so well, you couldn’t believe that this was how it turned out.

However, before you could see what happened next, the TV turned black and you were left with looking at your reflection within the screen.

“Wh—”

You turned round to see Gojo with the remote in his hand as he shook his head in fake solemn conviction.

“It’s just way too much foul language. How are you even watching this?” He sighed.

Leaning up from your seat, you grabbed the remote back from the man.

“Boy, JustGimmeThatShit.” You gave Gojo a stank face before turning the TV back on. Only this time, you lowered the volume.

Big turn off is when people are too much in his business — Which is real contradictory because Gojo’s the King of Tell Me The Drop, but he really believes that he’s superior in the sense that when he knows something, it’s because he rightfully should

Its kinda toxic tho because if you try and pry something out of Gojo because he may well be hiding something, he will vilify you for wanting to know shit from him

Turn ONs:

Kinda the opposite to Geto, but he loves strong smells (but only nice ones)

Use too much detergent in your clothes? Dont worry, Gojos inhaling the scent right tf out of it

New perfume? He notices right away and demands he get to smell all the areas you’ve used it

Cooking something zesty?! Gojo’s first in line to try it out (and sneaks nosefuls directly from the pot throughout the day)

“Gojo!”

Caught red handed, Gojo looked towards you like a deer caught in headlights, his eyes wide as he had the opened pot lid in his hands.

“I saw that!” You pointed.

Dropping the lid and quickly scrambling away from the crime scene, Gojo let out a high pitched cry. Walking over to the abandoned pot with a sigh, you placed the lid back on top to close it.

“We’ve spoken about this.” You say into the air.

You couldn’t see him but you heard the soft sound of pitiful shuffling from somewhere within the vicinity.

“I’m sorry…” You heard whine from a far away place. “It just smelt so good.”

He gets turned on from a good rub session.

It doesn’t even have to lead to sex, but Gojo just loves rubbing up on others and being rubbed on (permitted he likes the person)

Hes got langly arms so hes able to reach all parts of you regardless of your positions

Just being able to snuggle up with each other for hours on end is his thing; to the extent where you have to ask him if he needs to go toilet because he’d rather be busting to go than not suggle

Toji

Turn OFFs:

Things that take too long!!

Hes a very impatient man and wants everything instantly

you sometimes worry about doing things in public with him because his patience is vey minimal

“I’m not waiting any longer, gimme the car keys.”

You were just about getting the last of the items off the shopping list when Toji had popped up in front of you with a very constipated expression.

Sighing, you fling your head back in annoyance.

“I— TJ, just hold on! I only need to get the last of the stuff then we can go. Just queue up in line and by the time it’s our turn I’ll be back with the rest.”

“But I’ve been waiting for too long!”

“And I’ve only been gone for two seconds!” You say with open eyes.

Shrugging, Toji sorts his hands inside your pocket before pulling out the car keys.

“Doesn’t matter. I’m going back to the car.”

You couldn’t even stop him slugging off regarding your hands were full. Looking left and right, you called out to him.

“Wh—So where’s our shopping trolley?!”

Toji shrugs, his back towards you as he made his way towards the exit.

“In line.” He shouts back.

Nagging. This man absolutely hates when people nag him. It’s even more annoying because he will not get shit done on the first listen/ask so sometimes nagging is all you can do

He’ll literally switch off if he thinks you’re nagging him and it’s so jarring when he does because you could be telling him something so crucially important but because he was nagged an hour ago he’s not listening for shit

Turn ONs:

when you automatically co parent with him

now again, yes hes a bit of a lazy guy so any prospects of a potential babysitter guardian for his kids he’ll run at

but its that energy of treating his kids as your own (and no less to your other kids if you have any) that really turns him on

“Alright, ‘Gums, you know how this goes, right?”

The black haired boy nodded, a subtle smile on his face as he met you in the middle to shake hands.

“Of course. Win the match, or at least MVP, and then coerce dad into taking us out for a congratulatory meal.”

With a wide grin, you ruffled Megumi’s hair before patting him on the shoulders.

“That’s my boy. Now go get’em.” Surging him off onto the playing court, you gleamed upwards as you felt Toji come stand behind you.

“What’dyou tell ‘im?” He gruffly asks as he passes you your requested confectionery from the stand.

“Oh, nothing too much.” You grinned. “Just your usual pre-game encouragement!”

turned on by the exposure of flesh in subtle places

hes not talking barely no clothes (which he doesnt mind) or nakedness (which he even more doesnt mind) but when you wear an outfit that is supposed to be modest but theres a lil slip or cut in the cloth that shows just that sliver of innocent skin, hes bearing his teeth in glee

its the prospects that you could be showing a lot more or covering up way less but you choose to go sensible. yet that lil fun side to you still peaks out

Nanami

Turn OFFs:

overworkers

a bit canon yes but he hates when people dont know when to take a break. like my goodness its not everyday work yourself to the bone

hes very serious about holidays and clocking in overtime so the very scent of doing more than you should aggravates him.

“Where are you?”

Nanami’s voice over the receiver sounds plain but you can tell there’s a hint of annoyance in his voice.

“Hey Ken, I’m still at work. I’m just packing up now. You outside?” You say as you hold the phone between your ear and shoulders.

“It’s five past.” He grumbles.

Pausing in your tracks, you make a confused face.

“Yeah, and?”

“You should have been packed up ages ago.”

Noticing where he was coming from, you sighed loudly albeit with a smile tinted on your lips.

“I was just catching up with a colleague. Don’t worry, I’ll be right down.”

There was a slight pause, almost like a thought, before he spoke again.

“As long as you weren’t working past your finishing time—”

“Yes, of course! Never would I ever dare to work past clock-out!” You laugh as you make your way out of the office.

hes turned completely off when people have no regard for others

whether that be not tidying up after themselves or not being aware of their surroundings or even deciding to eat something shareable in the presence of others without othering

hes a very considerate man when it comes to these things and he genuinely hates when people are just really selfish with shit

Turn ONs:

Seduction

Seems quite vague because isn’t that how everyone’s caught?!

But no, someone having confidence to seduce him always works. It doesn’t mean he’ll always be receptive to it but simply having the guts to approach him will definitely have him thinking about it at night

As the music played throughout the apartment, you couldn’t help but dance playfully onto Nanami, backing up onto him as he stood rather distracted with the dishes.

“Versace on the floor, Ouuuh! Take it off for me, for me, for me, for me now girl!”

The man kept his head stoically focused on the dishes, trying his best to not engage with your antics.

“Come on, Ken, dance with me!”

You laid your hand out in his direction, beckoning him to your patronage. Nanami shook his head although he had a slight smile on his face.

“I’ve got to finish the dishes.” He excuses.

Leaning forwards to look at him, you lift your hand up to drag a smooth palm down his chest.

“Forget those for a second, handsome. They’ll always be here. Just come dance with me. for a bit.” You said in a sultry voice, you eyes hooded as you bit your bottom lip.

Nanami looks between the dishes and you three times before dutifully succumbing.

Cleanliness!!

Having a clean place, person and home is very important to Nanami! Even more when it comes to his significant other because he aint going down on nobody with glued shut booty flaked cheeks or poor grooming habits

but in general, just being graced with the cleanliness of others is his thing

#jjk #jjk imagine #jjk headcanons #geto x reader #geto x black reader #geto suguru #gojo x reader #gojo x black reader #gojo saturo #toji x black reader #toji x reader #toji fushiguro #nanami x black!reader #nanami x reader #nanami kento

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sanjisblackasswife · 1 year

Text

Zoro Taking Care of You (FLUFF)

@roronoaswifey ❤️

Black Fem Reader

CW: Established Relationship, Mentions of stomach pains ig, Clueless YetSoft!Zoro

I dont usually like posting on Sundays but why tf nat.

“Where is she?”

Zoro kept mumbling through the entire Sunny looking for you. You usually were under him or he under you when he woke up from his afternoon nap, but you weren’t and it made the boy a bit upset.

Cranky at best.

Maybe even pissy. But don’t tell him that, he would never admit he relies on you to take a proper nap.

“What the hell could she be?”

He grumbled around, heavy feet hitting the wodden floors of the entire ship until he back tracked hearing your voice from a cracked door.

“He—“

There you were, in the fetal position, holding your tummy, your legs keep moving up and down against each other as if that could possibly soothe the consistent pain you’ve been feeling for what seems like HOURS.

You looked a mess, felt a mess, and seeing your big boyfriend look at you with a contorted expression didnt help.

“Zooooooo.” You whined throwing your arm up weakly, motioning him to come closer, you felt a bit conflicted though, you hated to have your man see you like this, so weak, so helpless, and just wanted to die at that point.

Little did you know Zoro hated whenever you got like this every month.

He usually keeps his distance, you’re a bit moodier and don’t like to be bothered, but this was different, you really were in a different kind of pain and without much words being exchanged he cautiously walked over to you, his big warm palm rested on your thigh.

“You um…you okay?”

“Do I look fuckin—-“ You couldn’t even finish your irritated snap back a sharp pain already knocked the wind out of you, causing you to spill out a whimper.

Zoro groaned, rolling his eyes, not because he didn’t care but because even in discomfort you still wanna be a little smart ass.

“Move over.”

“I can’t….ZOOOO!”

Without thought you felt his big bare strong arms curl around your body, to lift you and place you on the other side of the bed, throwing off his shirt Zoro wraps his arms around you again to place on his soften chest.

You wasn’t sure why, maybe it was his scent, the way his hand was rested on your arm rubbing up and down so softly against your skin, or maybe it was the small forehead kiss against your soft curls, but Almost in an instant you felt like crying, and due to your hormones that’s what you did.

“WHA-WHY ARE YOU CRYING I DIDN’T HURT YOU!?”

His panic ALMOST made you laugh, but you held it in to look up at his worried eyes, with the last bit of strength you had you touched his flustered cheek to kiss it. Feeling his face relax a bit from the sheer fear that was in his face.

“You didn’t. Thank you…”

Zoro looks at your tired eyes. Your body was used to sleeping against his that his warm immediately made you sleepy, he gently pushes your head back down into his neck.

Your boyfriend turns to your mirror beside your bed, seeing your sleeping figure, one of your legs over his, like you guys usually sleep, face lightly frowning due to subtle pains arising again, he looks at your hand pressed against your lower tummy and replaces it with his giant warmer one. He notices your face starting to soothe and he smirks, rubbing small circles against you.

He kept staring at you. Your face so soft, so gorgeous in his eyes, dammit he didn’t know what to do with you, if he could he’d just keep you inside his pocket to protect you from everything, and if he could; your cramps as well.

He looked back down, your lips just inches from his he notices your pretty plumped lips , he just couldn’t help himself from giving it a light peck, cheeks beginning to turn red hoping you wont catch him in the act as he still rubs your belly.

“Feel better, mama…”

#one piece #TimikosZoro #black reader #one piece x female reader #female reader #zoro #zoro x y/n #zoro fluff #zoro imagine #zoro headcanons #zoro scenario #zoro x black reader #zoro x female reader #zoro x you #one piece headcanons #one piece x black!reader #x female reader

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oceanlipgloss · 4 months

Text

9.1.2024

—nsfw

Once again, I braved a battle of screaming abominations angels to unlock yet another H-scene: Mammon's! I honestly feel bad that this is going to happen behind Satan's back, but it's probably better that way. So! Without further ado, let's gooooo

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ´ˎ˗

intro: sir Mammon sir??? Wha??? As far as I can tell, HE SEEMS TO BE STANDING. Oh my f—this is gonna be wild and that 'let me in' sure has more meanings than one Still, I want to ignore all that for a moment and focus on the 'I will become yours' because it made my heart flutter. The demon of Greed himself, and a KING no less, is telling a human that he will belong to her. My, my, my <3

update I:...girl I swear it hasn't been long since your bestie Paimon helped you out that's how the story makes it chronologically seem, at least

update II: he's gonna spoil her. I can feel it. She's going to get princess treatment

update III: lmfao MC being awkward for once and not knowing how tf to tell him 'pls do me'? Simply golden

update IV: I'm sorry, but that 'anytime' kind of shot me in the heart also she's so awkward lol this is against the norm

update V: MC almost seems disappointed that she's naked again

update VI: some very nice demons helped her practice this small talk is kinda like two NPCs conversing funny lol anyway, could he perhaps be bothered by how MC has done this with others before?

update VII: *points at Mammon* why is he being so hot

update VIII: he's aiming for the heart and it's a bullseye 'you're a most precious being' Goddd <3 Romance aside, though, he makes sense. Everyone she has met so far is vying for her attention, and it will be that way with those she meets later on as well, so he would rather belong to her and 'inspire' her to choose him on her own in the process

update IX: I just CANNOT get over the idea of how someone so powerful is willingly giving himself to someone else, even more so in how he's a demon king telling a human that she's the first he's ever belonged to it makes my heart wiggle And honestly, despite how a pact/contract between a demon and a human directly makes said human the devil's master, and albeit the fact that he obviously likes her, I think that him viewing her as his master and welcoming that fact is very modest of him because in the end, he's one of the most powerful demons and a king too—and that's a package that usually comes with lots of pride, but he's so calm about it and accepting of it

update X: so he's not as close to Solomon as others seem to have been. But please back up for a moment, Mammon: what do you mean by saying your contract with Solomon was just a game? I want to hear the story behind that *rubs hands together* do tell Anyway, I've got an important note. I admire how they touched on the concept of greed. As in, MC has others but still feels so possessive of Mammon that even his contract with Solomon, whose whereabouts are currently unknown, bothers her—yet, the game doesn't label that as selfish, even though I think it's cruel and most definitely selfish (because, after all, MC can't have everyone—they're not objects or possessions, they have their own thoughts and feelings, and so she doesn't have the right to want them all, as it's brutally unfair to them even if they seemingly let it slide); the game just lets it be, though, and I really appreciate the dark tinge this has to it. It's a refreshing take.

update XI: smiling in the midst of a kiss? YESSS <;3 kinda weird how MC suddenly got so possessive over him though lol his sin of greed has to be affecting her oh, her very own sin of horny, too makes me wonder how unhinged she'll become once it's time to do the deed with Asmodeus or one of his subjects Ronové mmm

update XII: PFFFFFF the butt-wrestling match begins

update XIII: MC rn: oh, MC, we're really in it now

update XIV: HOT DAMN

update XV: so, um. I said this was going to be wild, didn't I? And I did say Mammon appeared to be STANDING, didn't I? Because would you look at that! This IS wild wild writing and he IS still standing SJSNLMS BRING IT

update XVI: GOOD GOD THAT CG FLAILS AROUND PASSES OUT DIES MAMMON IS NOT PLAYING

update XVII: in memory of MC: horny killed the cat 'I'm going to die' almost sent me but imagining the 'you felt like it would come out of your mouth' sentence made me mentally gag. Like goddamn, bro

update XVIII: a playful gentleman ugh yesss

update XIX: rough but sweet? Fuckkk he's really something also how TF is she even managing to stay quiet? The PP is so grand it stunned her Okay but he seems to be really affectionate and that makes me melt ALL THOSE KISSES <3

update XX: this is easily my favourite part of this scene. It's so gentle. He's telling MC in his own way that they should both just enjoy the current moment without her thinking of other things (i.e. if he's interested in her since she's Solomon's daughter). This silent reply is so sweet and romantic—an affirmation that proves his feelings and defies her doubts but she doesn't get the message

update XXI: oh what the hell Mammon, how sweet are you? But aaaah I was right lol it was love at first sight for him. He did fall in love first and he did fall in love quickly, and this in turn means that he's also doing this because he loves her. From earlier interactions with him I figured that that his H-scene would have a dose of intimacy, so this is really nice to have Also, I HAD to include at least one screenshot of this CG because dammit feel free to use your imagination in order to see beyond the heart "look beyond what you see."

update XXII: there we go again with the horns oh God oh dear God THEY ANNIHILATE ME EVERY SINGLE TIME And now? FUCKING HELL WAY TO GO MC, that was SO HOT. What she did with gripping his horn and making him lower his head is cute, but the intention behind that and licking his horn are both very sensual and I think they're going to take a toll on Mammon too

update XXIII: yup the poor man froze

update XXIV: gotta stay true to form I think I know what comes next how the tables have turned, huh MC? I'm sorry, but this is so funny to imagine lol

update XXV: 'bumped into your face' omfg I'm—lmaoooo MC: *panics in porn reference* Me: *snorts* HILARIOUS! ENTERTAIN ME

update XXVI: aaaaaaah I KNOW I keep saying this, I won't shut up about it though a powerful entity who also happens to be a KING being willing to do what a much weaker being wants DOES THINGS TO ME SJDNFDJKSNDKS when did MC ever say she wanted this though Mammon I know you also want to do this because you worship butts

update XXVII: MC be like pls chill big man inner voice: keep going

update XXVIII: someone get MC a floatie she's gonna drown

update XXIX: when I tell you I was LAUGHING through this last part??? What the fuck mannn lol MC needs to set aside towels and floaties for every H-scene fr I feel bad for the towels tho, they'll never make it out dry

update XXX: noooo this is playing a number on my stone-cold heart so soft and sentimentallll

update XXXI: he's really sweet

update XXXII: MC, come here for a minute *SMACK* that was insensitive asf, sweetie I genuinely question her intelligence sometimes lol how is she going to make my man Gusion like her at this rate sob PrettyBusy will somehow find a way and hopefully it won't be 'you're Solomon's daughter so I like you.' I have faith in my man Gusion Gusion aside, sorry hon one of the things I really like about Mammon is how he's not afraid to be straightforward and express his dislike for something, and he also directly says when a certain thing bothers him, no matter what. This also hints at the great confidence he holds in himself.

update XXXIII: fluff fluff flufffff

update XXXIV: arghhhhh he had to say that at the end <3

update XXXV: all this sugar is lethal

#mammon what in hell is bad #whb mammon #mammon whb #what in “hell” is bad #what in hell is bad #what in hell is bad diaries

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