#this final moment when her smile fades hits the hardest of all for me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

saiidahyunie · 3 months

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i can't go home, anymore

kim dahyun x reader ; angst

synopsis: a final tipping point was all it took for the cards to come crashing down between you and your wife dahyun.

wc: 3.7k

a/n: not big on writing angst (i want to however) but i do have a thing with holding a tenderhearted value with songs like these.

i'm crazy with the fics recently and i'm not stopping (until the start of next week) :D

✩♬ ₊˚.

—

your ears are filled with the calm sounds of the birds singing their own tuned melody, sitting on a bench facing towards a small lake, watching two ducks swim along in front of you.

the sight makes your mind spin in turmoil—the pain in your heart already hanging heavy with the thought hitting you, burning into your cells, fighting back the tears in your eyes from the tender moments flooding back in your brain.

everything snapped out when an old lady sat on the other end of the bench, letting out a relieved sigh relaxing while taking in the view after a long walk.

“it’s quite a calming view to take in isn’t it?” the lady speaks out, turning your eyes to see a soft smile spread across her lips.

“yeah,” you mutter, “it is.”

“i’ve been coming to this spot for at least 40 years now, and i never get tired of it.”

“really?”

the old lady nods, “this place is very special in my heart. it was right here where i met the love of my life.”

you lean back in intrigue, scooting yourself over towards the lady interested in her short life story, listening to her sweet laugh giving you relief for a few brief moments.

“i never got your name by the way, but i’m y/n.”

“i’m sana.” the old lady replies back to you with the softest smile you’d ever seen in your life.

“and you were married?”

“i was.” sana replies, “it was the most wonderful blessing that i ever had,” holding her hand out to show the golden wedding ring on her left ring finger, the detailing clearly aged and with scratches with the diamond still radiating in the sunlight.

“who was your wife?

“her name was momo, and sadly she beat me to the finish line first.”

in a second your gaze softens at the realization of what she meant. “i’m so sorry to hear that sana.” you say, clutching your chest, trying your hardest to not cry as sana comforts you by putting a hand up.

“it’s okay–uh..”

“y/n.”

“right, but don’t worry y/n, i’ve done the whole sad grieving act already.” sana assures, “it’ll come to pass with whatever you have troubling your life right now.”

all you could do was nod, it still stung with what happened, but sana was giving you probably the best piece of advice for you to hear, looking back at the pond to see the two ducks part ways from each other, going in opposite directions.

sana sees your eyes half-lidded, quirking her head just a bit trying to piece together your stoic body language, pouting her lips as she exactly knew what was going through your mind.

“i have a question for you y/n, have you ever been in love before?”

you pause at her question, almost hesitant to answer, but you close your lips and grab at what point sana’s trying to make to you.

“yeah. yeah, i have.”

sana hums at your answer, pleased that you decided to share a little bit of your love life to her.

“it’s really beautiful. nothing more beautiful ever compares than that.”

you and sana both look out to the pond once again, a flock of birds flying in and out of your view.

“can i tell you something y/n?”

you turn your attention back to sana, lending your ear for her thoughts.

“i know that my wife momo has gone ahead without me, and i can feel myself fading too. it’s scary as hell, to know that nothing will ever prepare you for the inevitable. but when i sit here at this same bench like i have for so many years up till this point, i can feel her presence beside me.”

“i know that feeling all too well,” you say, “to look at your loved one in the eyes and you just feel back at home again.”

“do you have a lover y/n?”

“her name was dahyun. i’ve been married to her for almost seven years now.”

“where is she now?”

you freeze at sana’s question, fighting your internal dilemma with a lump forming in your throat as the thought of her came flashing back to you. the sense of longing, feeling the fragments of her existence slipping through the cracks little by little each passing day.

“she’s been away for quite some time now. i don’t know when she’s coming back.”

sana looks down at the given answer, saddened to hear about your troubles.

“well i hope you go back to her and things work out for you, it’s always best to stand strong with the closest loves to your heart.” sana says to you standing up, well on her way to do her next activity somewhere else in the park.

“it was nice to meet you y/n, i hope we see each other here more often.”

“likewise sana, you have a nice day.”

the both of you exchange nice regards as sana leaves the bench you were still sitting at, staring at the lonesome duck that was now out of the lake, hanging on the edge almost waiting for its mate to return to them.

—

it was a long day after work one evening.

you were driving in the cold, relenting, and harsh weather that forced most of the routes back home backed up with traffic.

becoming distracted for the past couple of days, the demands of work beat you to the ropes with piling deadlines, fellow workers calling off in protest against your boss to ease the expectations for the quarter. needless to say, it was draining and you just wanted to be home right away.

in all perfect timing, your phone suddenly rang in the cup holder of your car, the caller id of a picture with dahyun appeared on your screen. in a flash you answered it on the steering wheel to hear your wife’s calming voice to put you at ease after the hellish day you just had.

“hi honey.” you greeted dahyun, “are you home?”

“i’ve been here for about two and a half hours.” dahyun answered, voice stoic and in a lower tone. on the other end of the call, she sits still on the floor of the living room, back leaning against the couch with the phone on the coffee table.

“ah okay, i’m already on the freeway so it’ll take me a bit because of this traffic.” you groaned.

“mhm okay.” dahyun says with little to no interest. a short period of silence settled in the phone call, with both sides having no idea where to take the conversation next. you start to feel that there was something wrong with the way that dahyun is speaking to you.

“you still there honey?”

“yeah.”

“aren’t you tired? you can go ahead and relax without me, i’ll get there sooner or later.”

you only hear a long dragged out sigh, dahyun hanging her head in sadness, she was fed up with this looped scenario of not being together when one desperately needs the other.

“y/n.” dahyun calls you through the phone again. “c-an you listen to what i’m going to say?”

“of course, what’s on your mind?”

dahyun looks up the bland ceiling above her with her lightless eyes, her heart aching as she takes a breath to prepare herself for what she was going to say to her wife.

there was no surprise that her marriage with you for almost seven years was the best adventure that you and her embarked on. the stars perfectly aligned with the dream honor for you to be the one to fall in love and win this magnificent woman’s heart.

you and dahyun’s relationship was like everyone else’s, filled with highs and lows, but if dahyun can notice what’s wrong, then surely you can catch on as well.

but this is where everything would change from this point on.

if you kept yourself positive about this, then dahyun would be bothered and highly cautious.

this was the last straw, where she could no longer keep staying back to avoid the eventual problem at hand.

she had already grew tired of pretending, despite the best efforts that regardless of how much she wanted to keep trying for the two of them, she knows that in the end it will be a damaging result.

for quite sometime, dahyun realized that it was going to be a losing situation, particularly when they share the common crisis that is dragging both of them down and thus preventing them from taking charge of their own independence—freedom one might say.

“i– i don’t think…we can go on like this anymore.” dahyun says, swallowing up the bitter taste that left in her mouth from the words she just uttered.

“what do you mean dahyun?” you asked puzzledly, staring at the red light in the intersection.

dahyun’s tears slowly drop in her cheeks, her face still expressionless as she looked up to the ceiling again, fighting back a sniffle as the memories you and her made together replayed in her mind.

“y/n, can you look at the reality of what’s happening between us?” dahyun continues through the phone, “i think this isn’t working for the both of us anymore. we should end all of this tonight.”

you leaned away from the steering wheel, the nervousness getting to you as your hands began to slightly tremble. “what d-do you mean dahyun? are you being serious about this?”

“it’s been on my mind for a bit now, babe.” dahyun replies. “i tried to consider all possible options, but from what i've been seeing between those, it was all down to what comes to making the right choice.”

you tense up your neck, gripping the wheel a lot more tightly as dahyun says what she’s been feeling lately, you want to be wrong but at the same time you decided to wait to hear her out to the end.

“we’ve been losing our track now. i don’t know the direction we’re heading but i think we’re just both lost in our ways. can you admit to me that you feel it too right? tell me you know what i’m talking about?”

you rub your forehead, trying to ease the headache of everything that’s happening to you all at once, clenching your hand into a fist. “i-i know. is this because we’ve lost too much time to spend with each other, dahyun? because i can tell you this, i’ve been giving everything to try to have some time for you just like today? don’t tell me that you didn’t notice.”

“how could you ask me if i’m also the one telling you about what this is doing to us?” dahyun confusingly asked, clenching her jaw at your stubbornness.

“y/n, you and i have our different responsibilities, but if we’re just gonna keep up this facade, it’s just hiding the fact that we’ve both lost all means to keep trying in this marriage. we’re just trying to deny it and that’s what really bothers me.”

you rub the back of your head and place your head on the headrest, the emotions starting to increase drastically.

you knew about this problem that you and dahyun were going through and never danced with the idea to properly have a conversion about it.

as friends on both dahyun and your corners started to catch wind of the situation, many were worried that something bad might happen in the end of all of this. you tried your best to keep your end of the bargain of the marriage, but you were on the short end of the stick the entire time.

because of this, you were now at a crossroads with the fear that has successfully come to fruition because of your ignorance and mistakes.

not all hope was lost yet.

there would be a last saving grace on your sleeve to use that would save all of the cards crumbling.

“dahyun, i know that what we’re facing together is difficult, but there was never a time that i had trouble to make you see how much i love you. i never ‘tried’ to love you; that should never be the concern in the first place. don’t do this, please….” you begged, gripping the wheel so tightly that your knuckles started to turn white.

“a part of me still believes that we could make it out of all of this, alright? don’t give up on me dahyun. i don’t want this to be a lingering regret for you.”

dahyun sniffs her tears, wiping them away from her face, her breaths heavy. “why does this have to be so hard for us y/n?”

your heart and the world around you was crumbling around it felt like when you heard the stress and tired exhausting dahyun released with just a simple question.

“i knew the many trials that we had to face when we first got married but, all i ever wanted to ask of you was to be there for me when it matters the most. our jobs are taking both of our time together, and it’s giving me a sign that i have to sacrifice something important to lose here—like i’m cornered with no other way out.”

“da-”

“y/n, i love you, and i will never get tired of saying this to you. i feel your pain too. i just...i just can’t take it anymore with the current state that we’re in. you and i both know that we deserve to be in a better headspace than this, and i think for that to happen is when we look for that ourselves, to do this on our own this time instead of together.”

you stayed silent as a tear fell on your cheek.

“i may regret the fact that i have to be the one to break this off, but i don’t see another way. i’m sorry if i’m not choosing you to be saved, but we still have many things that we have to prioritize, at least we’re doing this for good right now. let’s just break up here and now, y/n. thank you for being my first and last love, for everything that we’ve done together. for being my wife.”

“dahyun, wait— don’t just….” you shake your head, face contorting as you lightly sob while driving. “don’t go, please. we can still find a way, just don’t leave me like this.”

even while in the car you still felt like you could be on your knees, pleading your heart out as you still believe that there was a light at the end of the tunnel.

dahyun clutches the pillow she grabbed from the couch, hearing your sob as she just closes her eyes, trying to block out the sound from her ears mentally. “it’s going to be okay y/n, we’re going to be okay.”

“no we’re not…” you say breathily, “in all my life, i needed more than myself. i needed what i never thought that i could ever feel. you were the one to bring all the answers at my feet dahyun, how can i be ever okay when i’m losing you too?”

dahyun nodded at your question, clearly understanding what you meant.

you weren’t in a good place when dahyun first met you, but she brought you everything that you desperately wanted; a fallen star, the heart and soul, the calm cyclone within your storm, and so much more.

dahyun could only hear you whisper “i'm so sorry dahyun” to herself as she silently cried in the house you and her shared, listening to your sorrowful conjecture.

“i haven��t been mine and i’m no longer yours anymore. i’m not certain of anything now dahyun.” you wailed, “please, just let me know now, will you be the one to hear my callings? can you be the one place i will always come back to?”

“i will, now that we’re free to do whatever we please. i will come after you, even if as a friend now but my heart will forever be yours.”

what seemed like forever in the phone call, dahyun smiled a little from the response she gave to you, assuring that nothing bad could ever happen for what comes after tonight.

she still wanted to stay connected, still closer to each other, and the memories to not be tainted with this one bad instance.

for dahyun, she couldn’t fathom with the idea of you not being in her life. she can’t imagine you being a stranger, so that’s why she gave you a rope to hang on so that you won't be a part of her memories.

she still needed you because of how special you are.

you had the same reaction in the car, lips curling a bit into a smile and the tears stopped coming. “i’ll hold you to that.”

“goodbye y/n, now come home and sleep with me for one last night. don’t worry about me, i’ll still wait for you, that way we both can let it all out together.”

not long after, you eventually weaved out of the slow traffic and safely arrived back home. dahyun opened the door for you, pairing your lips with hers, letting the scent of lavender and the taste of minty toothpaste fill your senses, not wanting these last opportunities to go to waste.

dahyun combed her fingers through your hair as you collapsed to the ground at the door, like letting the weight that you’ve been holding up all this time finally fall down, apologizing to her that you failed to keep this relationship that you had.

after a slow nighttime regimen with little to no words said, you finally embraced dahyun in the covers, consoling you as you fight the urge to sleep.

dahyun notices your fingers grazing hers, letting them hook on each other like an instinct that’s been practiced for so many years now as she holds your hand.

you didn’t want her to let go.

tears flow out of dahyun’s eyes as she removes her twined fingers from yours, clasping your hand after to give it a lasting squeeze.

“i still have faith in us y/n. this won’t be the end of our story, i’ll always wait for you and maybe, we can pick up right where we left off.”

you hummed sleepily, clutching to dahyun a little more tightly as she scratches your head.

“i’ll never change, it will always be you that i love for the rest of my life.”

dahyun then pressed her head against yours, hugging in her slumber for the last time, with the memories that were filled in the shared bedroom—the many sweet nothings said filled with loving touches. you and her both wanted to leave this terrible night, dreaming of being together again with no worries whatsoever.

maybe a glimpse of the future, but all of that changed from the next day forward.

—

you blinked a couple more times, looking around again to see that not much time had passed from sitting on the bench. the duck that was sitting in front of you at the edge of the lake was reunited with its mate, swimming along together, smiling at the cute interaction of mother nature’s children.

the memory of that night still lingered in your mind, until you finally decided that it was time to go to the next spot for today, standing up with a bag on your back, taking in the view for the last time of the lake as you walked to the bus.

a quick trip to the next place as it was a big field that had rows of flowers set in front of something, you finally arrived where you wanted to be, setting your bag down with various foods and drinks. you sat yourself down to take two shot glasses, pouring them with apple soju and placed a covered beef bowl with mixed veggies in between, setting a pair of chopsticks on top of the said bowl as you pull another one out for yourself.

“hey dahyun, i’m home.” you say staring at the clean tombstone standing from the ground that had your wife’s name on it.

off to the side, there were a set of flowers that were probably brought by minju who was dahyun’s best friend that came earlier in the week since they still bloomed freshly.

“i’ve brought you one of your favorites to eat! made them myself just yesterday.” you say, clapping your hands together to say grace before eating the beef bowl, looking at the picture of you and her hugging the first house party you hosted since getting married.

after finishing most of the bowl, you set it next to the other bowl that was still full of food as you look out to the distance again. softly smiling at the view it presented since it was a nice sunny day with the clouds gliding past the sky.

“not a day goes by where i miss you my love. it’s been difficult at times, but i still continue to move forward.” you say aloud, drinking the full shot glass of soju before putting it next to the opened bottle on the stone.

a brief wave of regret comes over you, sniffling again with your face not shifting at the thought of dahyun not being in this world with you anymore, the empty feeling digging deep in your heart as a few tears streamed from your face, but you still smiled because it wasn’t in terrible pain—not anymore.

“i hope everything up there is what you always wanted it to be, i’ve got a lot of time left on this earth but i can't wait to see you again soon.”

and by pure coincidence, an eagle flew above you looking directly upward. it may have been random or maybe it was a sign that dahyun was truly watching you from above, softly smiling again at what you just watched what happened.

“oh! by the way, i met a lovely old lady at the park earlier, her name was sana! she told me a story about her wife momo and well, let me just explain the rest.”

even though it had been two years since dahyun had passed, you still made the effort to visit her every seventh day of each month, a sign of your love and devotion to her that you will continue to do as you rambled to dahyun about your busy days, but this one was a little bit special than the others.

#kpop x reader #twice x reader #twice dahyun #kim dahyun #dahyun imagines #dahyun x reader #twice angst #twice fluff #kim dahyun x reader

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cherienymphe · 3 years

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Twice Mine (Stucky x Reader)

WARNINGS: DUB-CON, mentions of NON-CON, vampire!Stucky, jealous!Stucky, violence, toxic relationships, murder, animal cruelty, bloodplay

➥ this is the much anticipated final part to Twice Bitten and Twice Burned

I had a lot of fun with this series, and I hope you guys enjoy!

➥ divider by @firefly-graphics

➥ Italics = things that have already happened

➥ Non italics = present day

summary: King Steve has the reputation of the kindest king in all the land. How sad it is that such a man always seems to be burying a wife, leaving him lonely and searching for another. Seeing how Queen Margaret’s death affected you, the king hopes to raise your spirits by marrying you off to the handsome Duke, James Barnes, unbeknownst to you, sealing your fate.

The large living room was alight with the glow of the fire, the flames the only source of light in the entire room. The mansion was quiet, as it tended to be, but for the past week or so, it was a different kind of quiet. A heavy silence that was almost suffocating had descended over the place. You barely turned your head to the side, swallowing down a sigh.

You felt him before you heard him, a strong concern that didn’t belong to you taking up residence in your heart beside your own. You pressed your hand to your chest, the weight within it increasing as the sound of his footsteps reached your ears. His large hands soon found a place on your shoulders, fingers kneading into your bare flesh in what was meant to be a calming gesture. You hadn’t been calm in days.

“Come to bed,” he murmured, voice gravelly, still riddled with sleep.

You shook your head, eyes focused on the flames.

“I can’t sleep.”

He sighed, an exasperated sound as his fingers danced along your throat.

“You can’t sleep...you can’t eat…”

You swallowed, heart sinking at the knowledge that you’d been found out.

“...I’m fine,” you told him.

“Remember what happened the last time you went so long without feeding…”

His words made your eyes cloud over, the memory so fresh in your mind you would’ve thought it happened yesterday instead of centuries ago.

“...it nearly broke you,” he whispered. “I don’t want to see you like that again.”

You didn’t respond, eyes instead falling to the floor as his grip tightened.

“Y/N.”

You shook your head.

“He was supposed to be back days ago,” you murmured, throat tight. “We haven’t heard from him in days.”

He exhaled, leaning down to press his lips to the top of your head, breathing you in.

“Can you still feel him? Focus...just like I taught you...”

You could. It was faint, and you had to search deep within yourself, but you could still feel him there within your chest. A light warmth that had been there since you’d first woken up into this new life.

“I can.”

“Then he’s alright…”

“Then why hasn’t he called? Or let us know that he’s okay?” you wondered, standing now as frustration colored your tone.

“It’s not the first time, doll. He will be fine, he always is, but you won’t be if you don’t drink something…”

The dull burn in your throat became all the more prominent as he reminded you of your thirst. A thirst that you hadn’t satiated in days. You turned, reluctantly lifting your eyes to meet the blue of his.

“I don’t think I can...not without…”

You trailed off, recalling the last and only time you had practically starved yourself. The lack of control you’d had… A small sigh reached your ears, and you watched as he nodded, stepping closer until his chest grazed yours.

“Drink from me for now...and then we’ll go hunting tomorrow.”

His hand was on your wrist, pulling you with him as he stepped back. He sank into the armchair, and you straddled him, fingers pressing into his shoulders as you made yourself comfortable. He gazed up at you like you had his heart in your hands, and the corner of your mouth lifted ever so slightly.

“Anywhere you want,” he breathed.

Brushing your tongue over your bottom lip, you leaned in and sank your teeth into his throat. His hips lifted up into yours, hands curled around your waist as a low groan escaped you. Your eyes rolled as your body welcomed his blood into your system, coursing through your veins to give you much needed strength.

A hungry moan bubbled in your throat, and Steve sighed.

Someone was yelling. Even through the jumbled haze that was your mind, you could recognize that much. It was also hard to breathe. Did you even need to breathe now? Probably not, but surely you did if the way you were clutching your chest and gasping for breath was anything to go by. Could vampires have panic attacks? Could vampires go into shock?

“You killed her!”

You had heard someone scream that only moments ago, and yet here they were again. There was so much yelling, so much chaos, and through it all, the voice became clear. Both voices became clear. It was James...and Steve…

The thought of the blond made your lips curl, and you shakily pulled yourself to your feet. You glanced down at your dress, taking note of the faded blood. Your blood. You had tried to kill yourself, you remembered that now...and James had found you… Both James and Steve had found you. Then Steve had killed you.

The memories were coming back so fast. You could hardly make sense of it all, and it took some time before you remembered your awakening...James...Steve… Mary Jane. Your lips parted as you eyed the fresh blood on your dress...your hands… It did not take long for your eyes to find Mary Jane’s still body just at the foot of the bed.

“No...no, no,” you mumbled, falling to your knees once again at her side.

Had you done this? You could not recall. There were blanks in your mind, but if you thought hard enough, you could conjure the uncontrollable thirst that had taken over you. You could remember the way James had attempted to stop you, the way Steve had laughed as you brutally drank from your maid. You could hear yourself scream, grief and rage hitting you all at once just before laying waste to the room.

You glanced up, eyes widening at the torn bedding and broken furniture. There were feathers everywhere. A soft sob left you as you cradled the lifeless girl in your arms. James and Steve were still arguing, fighting even, and you squeezed your eyes shut. This all felt like a bad dream. A nightmare...fueled by the vampire in the next room.

Had you been filled with less rage, you would have marveled at how quickly you moved. You found yourself in the receiving chamber, pinning Steve to the wall before you even realized what had happened. He merely chuckled, sharp teeth winking at you, blue eyes filled with mirth at your crisis.

“You did this to me,” you screamed, hitting at him. “You did this-!”

You cut yourself off with a sob just as James wrapped his arms around you, pulling you away from the other man. He shushed you, trying so hard to calm you, but you were inconsolable. The reality of the situation, your new reality, was finally starting to sink in, and you thought that the weight in your chest would crush you.

If it was not for James’ hold, you would have fallen to the floor. You had the hardest time breathing, setting your vision straight, and you shook so violently in his arms. You could feel him pressing kisses into your hair, still damp from what had transpired only hours ago.

“Go.”

That single word broke through, and it took you a moment to realize that he was not speaking to you. He was speaking to Steve. It seemed that both you and Steve came to the realization at the same time.

“Surely you are joking…”

“I mean it, Steve. You should not be here...not right now…”

“James-.”

Steve swallowed his words as you escaped and dug your nails into his throat, and while your attack did not last long, Steve easily fending you off, you were satisfied with the blood you had drawn. You fell to the floor but made no move to stand, hands pressed into the rug as you keeled over with another sob.

“You killed her, Steve.”

“Really? Because she seems to be alive and well from where I am standing,” the king sneered. “I have the marks to prove it.”

“You threw her off of the balcony!”

There was so much venom in James’ voice, and the silence that followed was thick.

“She would have left us. Both you and I know that she would have tried again, and she would have succeeded! Is that what you would have wanted?”

You heard the wall shake.

“She did not deserve that,” James spat. “She deserved better. She deserved a painless death and a peaceful transition.”

Your nails scraped along the fabric of the rug as you recalled the pain of your body slamming into the stones below. The fear that had been enough to paralyze you once you realized what Steve had done.

“Now I must undo what you have done. I have to make this right for her...and I cannot do that with you around. You need to stay away from her for a while.”

You slowly lifted your head at James’ words, eyes taking in the scene before you. James had his hand at Steve’s throat, and you were surprised to find Steve’s cold gaze on you instead of James. He stared at you with such hatred, such contempt, and to your shock, you evenly stared back at him with the same look.

“You’re in trouble, you know that right?”

Steve’s quiet words reached where you stood all the way at the top of the stairs. You heard James sigh, and your relief at his safe return was unfortunately overshadowed by the fact that he’d gone an entire week with no call, no text, no nothing to let you know that he was okay.

He finally stepped out of the foyer and into the living room, Steve just behind him, and he at least had the gall to look sheepish. You wrapped your arms around yourself, far from cold, but just a force of habit whenever you felt particularly pouty. James threw you a small smile to which you did not return.

“I’m home, my love.”

You didn’t respond, and his smile faltered.

“You look radiant…”

Again, you ignored his words as you finally made your way down the stairs, the bottom of your dress kissing your feet. His face fell when you brushed past him and instead made your way to Steve.

“Steve, I’m thirsty,” you said with a frown, and the blond bit back a smirk.

“You just ate yesterday,” he reminded you.

“Well, I want to go again,” you argued.

You huffed when he gripped your shoulders, forcing you to face James. The dark-haired man resembled a kicked puppy, and you looked away. Steve leaned down to brush his lips against your ear.

“Cut him some slack, doll. You know how demanding business can be,” he told you.

He briefly squeezed your shoulders before leaving you altogether, and you reluctantly met James’ eye. His shoulders fell, and he took a step towards you.

“The deal didn’t go as smoothly as we thought it would. Would you believe me if I told you that doing business with humans is easier than with our own kind?”

Again, you didn’t respond. At least, not right away, and you simply raised an eyebrow at him.

“Do phones not work in Romania?”

He closed his eyes, releasing a sigh.

“I was worried-.”

“I was fine.”

“...and how was I to know that?”

He tilted his head at you, pressing the palm of his hand to your chest where your heart would beat if it could. That warmth was more prominent now that he was near, and you could feel his remorse for his lack of communication with you while he was away. His blue eyes were soft as he gazed at you.

“This is how you know,” he said.

“That’s...not the point, James,” you sighed, turning away. “I get anxious. You know that…”

He wrapped his arms around you from behind, pulling you into his chest.

“I know.”

“I don’t like it when we’re not all together. I hate when you go on these business trips by yourself,” you told him, turning in his hold. “Poor Steve has to put in twice the work just so I won’t miss you.”

James smirked, eyes glinting with mischief.

“Somehow, he manages to power through it, I’m sure,” he sarcastically replied.

You leaned in, brushing your lips along his chin, satisfied when James released a shaky breath.

“Are you coming hunting with us? I feel like it’s been so long with the three of us…”

His eyes narrowed ever so slightly, pink lips curving even more as he drank you in.

“Didn’t Steve say you just went hunting…?”

“...so?” you wondered, raising an eyebrow.

James chuckled, lips brushing yours as he spoke.

“You can’t get everything you want, my love.”

“You say that...and yet I always do,” you wondered, spinning away.

“We’ve talked about this, Y/N. We have to be careful,” he argued, halting your movements with a hand on your wrist. “This is a rather small town, and we stand out enough as it is.”

You didn’t respond, and he continued.

“Remember the last small town and your appetite?” he probed.

“It’s not my fault their community was filled with abusive and rapist scum. Besides, wasn’t that when I was snapping Steve’s neck every other week or so? I had to fully take out my frustrations on someone.”

He pulled you closer.

“You like it here, don’t you?”

“Yes.”

“...and you want to stay for a long time, right?”

“...yes,” you reluctantly replied. “...but I’m thirsty, so…”

You ran your eyes along his frame.

“Somehow, some way, I’m drinking someone’s blood tonight.”

The scream that you let out was gut-wrenching, and you were thankful that you were deep in the woods. Far away from the village and the kingdom. The only light came from that of the moon as it hung in the sky, and for once, you wished that you were bathed in darkness instead. You did not want to see the consequences of your actions, see what you had done.

You were reminded of that first night in your new life. You could hardly breathe and hardly make sense of what was happening. Like before, the memories came to you quickly, filling in the holes that had been missing from the last day or so.

The thought of drinking blood, harming another, even if it did not cost them their life, was enough to disgust you. You had had enough, and had refused to drink for days. James had warned you. Oh God, he had warned you. You thought yourself above this life. You thought that your heart was too good for this life and that your will would overpower your nature. You were wrong, and the lifeless body in your arms was proof of that.

The boy was young, so young. He had long passed the precipice of childhood, but had yet to reach that of a man, and now he never would. You did not even remember smelling him, nor snatching him away, but when you closed your eyes, you could see it. You could see how unaware he had been as he poked through bushes to find some berries to pick. You could see the way you zeroed in on him. You could see the monster that you had become.

Another loud sob escaped your trembling lips as you rocked him in your arms, wishing and hoping that he would wake up. That it would all be a nightmare, he would wake up, and prove that you were not the monster you now thought yourself to be.

You felt him before you saw him, and when you reluctantly lifted your head, you were surprised to come face to face with Steve...not James.

“I killed him,” you sobbed.

Steve sighed, frowning at you as he approached. You had not seen him in months, only in passing really, and you had forgotten just how much you hated him. However, in this moment, you did not wish to be alone. You wished for someone to reassure you that you were not some crazed beast. Anything to stop the pain.

“Yes, well… James told me of the grand conclusion you came to, thinking yourself above your nature,” he scoffed, and you frowned.

He shook his head at you.

“Honestly, Y/N. What did you think would transpire?”

There it was again, that rage, and your lip curled.

“This is your fault. All of this is your fault!”

You were standing now, and Steve tilted his head at you.

“You did this to me. I am like this because of you...because of what you forced onto me.”

Steve took a step towards you, something in his eyes that you could not place.

“What is done, is done. This,” he pointed to the lifeless body at your feet. “...happened because of you, because you refused to accept your new reality. This happened because you tried to go against nature, your nature.”

His words filled you with an anger that you could hardly fathom, and before you knew it, your hands were on his head and then he was at your feet, neck twisted at an odd angle. You blinked, eyes widening as you realized what you had done, and you stumbled back. You hated Steve, God knows you did, but James would be far from happy about this.

As if you summoned him up, he was suddenly there, and you jumped at the sight. Your wide eyes met his just before he took in the mess you left behind, and he sighed when his eyes landed onto the boy.

“Oh, Y/N,” he breathed, sounding sad.

“I…”

You glanced at Steve’s still form.

“Steve...he...I…”

You did not know how to tell him that you had killed his best friend, but James merely glanced at Steve before chuckling.

“I assure you, Steve is fine.”

You frowned, and he elaborated.

“You did not kill him...not permanently, at least,” he explained. “You just snapped his neck. It is something like a temporary death for us. He will be alright. It is rather painful though, but...even I must admit that he had it coming.”

“He will be angry with me,” you murmured. “...but he always seems to be angry with me. He blames me for your...separation.”

“Steve has no one to blame but himself, my love” he said, kneeling beside the nameless boy.

“You...were right, James,” you whispered, choked up.

He looked to you, eyes heavy with a myriad of emotions you could not even begin to name. Regret being the most evident one.

“I thought that I could fight it. I thought that I could make myself be something that I am not. Steve was right when he said that I did not want to accept my new reality, and I hate admitting that.”

“I will help you through this-.”

“No.”

He blinked at you, standing now as he worriedly eyed you.

“I cannot do this,” you confessed.

“Y/N-.”

“I am sorry. I am...so sorry,” you whispered, leaving him there in the blink of an eye.

Your fingers tangled in Steve’s hair as he swirled his tongue in and out of you. His lips couldn’t get enough, and he pressed his fingers into your thighs, holding you down. James was far on the other side of the room, face torn between hunger and disappointment. Despite the fact that he was safe and sound, you were still miffed about his lack of communication.

“You can look...but you can’t touch.”

That was what you’d told him, and even though it was obvious how much he wanted to protest, he obeyed. Now he stood as still as a statue, hands balled into fists, face taut as he fought to prevent himself from tasting you as Steve was currently doing.

Your chest was pointed towards the ceiling, mouth parted as moans climbed out of your throat. Steve was ravenous between your legs, groans escaping here and there to send vibrations through you, making you clench around his tongue.

“Steve,” you moaned, eyes rolling.

That was what you both loved and hated about Steve. He could remain between your thighs for days on end if you allowed him to. Your voice caught when he pushed you over the edge, chest heaving and stomach tightening while the blond greedily lapped at you, refusing to waste a single drop. You could hear James swallow as Steve crawled up your spent frame, blue eyes narrowing like that of a feline.

He pulled you into his lap, bare chest pressed to yours, arms wrapped around your waist. You threw your own around his neck, nose brushing his as you let out a happy sigh.

“I think I’ve tortured James enough, don’t you?”

You grinned at him, and Steve returned it, leaning up. You pulled back, smile widening as you evaded his kiss.

“I don’t know, doll. I think he could stand some more,” he purred.

The mischief in his eyes matched your own, and you both turned to leer at James, your cheek pressed against Steve’s. You offered your hand to James, and it was impressive how fast he moved, taking your hand and pressing his lips to yours. You moaned into the kiss while Steve trailed his own lips to your neck.

Your teeth scraped along James’ mouth, drawing blood, and your body buzzed at the taste. A low moan crawled from James’ lips as you leaned down to sink your teeth into his throat, his hand coming up to twist into your hair. You pulled away with a sigh, Steve’s mouth seeking out your own, eager to taste James on your tongue. You could hear the dark-haired man swiftly undressing, pressing his chest to your back in no time, eager to make his absence up to you.

“You need to come back.”

You froze, eyes focused on Steve as he stood in the tiny cottage you had taken up residence in, making the space look that much smaller. You swallowed as you eyed him, recalling the last time you saw him in which you had snapped his neck. That was the last time you saw James too. That was months ago. Your emotions must have been all over your face because Steve simply smirked.

“Relax. I am not here to snap your neck as you did mine,” he assured you, stepping further into the place.

He looked as regal as he always did, blond hair neatly pushed out of his face.

“Nor would you be in the right to. If anything, you had it coming from the moment you killed me,” you hissed.

He narrowed his eyes at you, and you continued before he could speak.

“Why are you here? How did you find me?” you demanded, genuine confusion coloring your tone.

“Do not be daft, sweet Y/N. We have known of your whereabouts this entire time. If it were not for James, I would have dragged you back to the castle long ago, but he insisted that you needed time,” he explained.

“...and yet here you are.”

Steve’s jaw ticked, and he neared you.

“Yes. Here I am, because you need to come back,” he repeated.

“Why?” you scoffed. “...so you can torture me some more? Make my life as miserable as your heart?”

“He is not the same,” Steve suddenly said, making you swallow your words. “He needs you.”

The thought of James sullen and wasting himself away was enough to make your heart clench, but you simply folded your arms over your chest, glancing away.

“I am happy here,” you told him.

“Really? Happy here to feed on the squirrels and the deer like some beast of the wild?” he sneered.

“What is it to you?”

He was on you in a flash, fingers pressing into your jaw so harshly you could have sworn you heard it crack. His nose brushed against yours as he glared into your eyes, an untamable fire behind his own.

“It means something to me because I wish to see him happy. As much as I despise your very presence...he is not himself whilst you are gone,” Steve told you.

You scoffed.

“Are you no longer enough for him? Funny, because whenever I was around, all he seemed to do was put you first-.”

You cut yourself off with a gasp as he slammed you into the wall, the small house shaking from the force. Your eyes watered and your lips trembled as you glared at the man before you, the man who had killed you.

“I am giving you one week. One week to do what you must. Drink from all the animals you like, tear through every tree while imagining my face on them, get whatever you must out of your system,” he began.

You looked away, and he pressed his lips to your cheek.

“If you have not returned in a week, if you run, I will find you...and I will drag you back...but not before reminding you of just how cruel I can be,” he purred.

You pushed against him, and he merely moved to catch your wrists, slamming them into the wall. Steve's forehead was pressed to yours, and you could not meet his eye.

“You may not be as weak as you once were,” he started, forcing his knee between your legs. “...but you will never be strong enough to fend me off. I have no problem reminding you of that.”

He brushed his lips over your trembling ones, and then he was gone, ruining your peace once again. You cried for the first time in weeks that night. You had no doubt that if you ran, Steve would find you. You did not know how they even found you to begin with, but it was scary to think that they knew where you were this entire time without your knowledge. What else were they capable of?

As much as you did not want to, it was exactly one week later that you found yourself returning to the castle. It was late in the night, all of the servants and any other guests fast asleep, when you walked through the doors. James was there before you hardly got a foot inside, and you were in his arms before you knew it.

“I have missed you,” he sighed, squeezing you to him.

He breathed you in, and you found yourself doing the same, reluctant to admit that you missed him too. For a moment, you were reminded of a time where you felt safe in his arms, and you wondered if you would ever feel that again. When soft footsteps reached your ears, you looked up, Steve’s eyes meeting yours as he stood behind James, practically bathed in darkness. It was then that you realized the answer was no. You would probably never feel that again. Not while Steve was around.

Contrary to what you had thought, the time that followed was far from miserable. Steve still kept a safe distance, and James did his best to teach you about your new life. Whenever you did see Steve though, it was cordial...polite...but tense. There was something unspoken in the air that you were reluctant to give attention to. It stewed for the longest time until James was the one to finally bring attention to it.

“We need to talk, my love,” he said to you one evening.

You had frowned a bit, but eventually closed your book, giving him your full attention. You could not read his face, and that worried you.

“It is about Steve,” he began.

You swallowed, straightening.

“What about Steve…?”

At this point, it had been two years since your death that was somehow both literal and metaphorical, and you had not come any closer to softening your heart towards the king. You hardly saw him, hardly spoke to him as he continued to do as James asked and gave you the space to make your transition into this life much smoother.

James sighed, reaching up to brush his thumb along your cheek.

“It is meant to be the three of us…”

You looked away, heart sinking as you realized what this was about.

“That is how I envisioned our future, and I hope that we can get back to that some day.”

“James…”

“I am not rushing you. Believe me, there is still much anger in my heart towards him for what he did, and I know that my anger cannot ever compare to yours. I only wish to remind you that this is what I hope for us some day.”

You did not respond, and he continued.

“I am bringing this up because I have spoken with Steve...and he will be doing his best to make amends. I want you to expect that…”

Yours eyes met his, and he left you with a small smile. You soon found out that Steve’s version of making amends was to buy you things you had never asked for.

“It is all the rage in France,” Steve huffed as you turned your nose up at the gaudy necklace.

“Well, I am sure they will appreciate having it returned to them,” you snidely commented

Fed up, he threw the necklace to the ground, pointing a finger at you.

“You are being unnecessarily difficult,” he hissed.

Your eyes widened and your lips parted as you stared at him as if he had grown a second head before your very eyes.

“This...,” you picked up the other jewels he had brought. “...means nothing. All of this means nothing!”

You threw them at him, taking great satisfaction in the offended look he wore.

“You killed me!”

Two years worth of anger and hurt had been stewing. Your fingers trembled and your body vibrated and your eyes burned as you stared at the blond man before you. Your murderer.

“You taunted me and made my life hell for years! And then...and then you tossed me...off of a balcony,” you shakily gasped. “...and you think that your money will atone for that?”

Steve said nothing, face taut as your words hit him square on.

“You think these meaningless things will undo what you have done? How on earth did you manage to keep the throne all these years with nothing between those ears of yours?”

He was quick in invading your space, and his chest heaved with barely contained anger as you glared at him.

“You will watch how you speak to me.”

“Or what? You shall kill me? Again?”

He said nothing, and his nostrils flared.

“James will end your pitiful existence the minute that you do,” you spat.

The words had just barely left your mouth when his hand found your throat. Having anticipated this because Steve was nothing if not predictable, you grabbed the bejeweled dagger he had tried to gift you, plunging it straight into his chest. You felt no disgust when he coughed, blood flying past his lips and onto your face. You could only feel satisfaction as you watched the pain register on his features.

Your gratification did not last long as you watched him swallow down the ache, a troubling laugh escaping his bloody lips. His wide eyes took you in with something you could not name, but if you did not know any better, you would think it was pride. He chuckled again, his hand coming up to cover your own that still held the knife in his chest. He leaned in, with difficulty, and brushed his blood-stained lips over your own.

“Word of advice...a piece of wood is what you desire.”

He tightened his grip on your hand, and you winced, gaze never parting from his.

“Also...you might want to aim a bit higher next time,” he said through clenched teeth just before ripping it out.

You gasped as he snatched it from your fingers, quickly fisting his other hand into your hair, pressing the blade to your throat. You just felt a trickle of blood when James came bursting into the room. He was quick to pull Steve away, pinning the king to the wall.

“Have you lost your mind?”

Steve merely chuckled, a smirk on his pink lips.

“We were just having some fun. Right, Y/N?”

He looked to you, and you merely huffed, brushing past them both, ignoring James as he called for you. You did not see a future in which you would ever forgive Steve for what he did, what he put you through, but you could not accept one in which the two of you were constantly at each other’s throats. Something had to give.

Is this what you had come to? Is this who you were now? The thought was enough to make you sick, but surely it was the only way? Right…? Steve did not stir, and his body was warm beneath yours as you tightened your hands around the stake. The entire time that you whittled it, you kept wondering to yourself if this was what you really wanted to do? Could you even do this?

You pressed the end of it to his chest and swallowed. Would James hate you? He would be mad, that was for sure. That was to be expected even, but surely he could grow past this right? If your heart was able to beat, you were positive that it would be threatening to leap from your chest this very moment. Why were you scared? Why were you nervous? Steve deserved this...a thousand times over.

You were having doubts, and you did not want to admit that. You had stewed over this for months. Months of arguing and fighting. How many times had you drawn blood from him and vice versa? How many more? You jumped, startled when a hand closed around both of yours, and you lifted your gaze to meet the unflinching one of Steve. It suddenly occurred to you that he may have been awake this entire time.

You sharply inhaled, but he simply smiled, pink lips curving upwards ever so slightly.

“Do it,” he urged.

Your eyes widened, and you almost listened to him, but you faltered.

“Go on...do it…”

His blue eyes glinted with something unknown, and his teeth winked at you as he grinned.

“...why?” you suddenly wondered. “Why do you want me to?”

He tilted his head at you.

“You must learn to survive this life one way or another…”

You frowned, heart sinking at that.

“I… James…”

Steve hummed, nodding.

“Yes. He will be quite angry. I daresay he might even kill you,” he told you.

Your eyes widened at that, chest clenching.

“...the same he would do to me should I ever take you away from him.”

Your shoulders dropped at that, and you blinked.

“He loves us both...and he does not intend to live the rest of his days without either one of us by his side. I may not like this, but I have come to accept it.”

You glanced away, his words taking up residence within you.

“...but if you cannot accept this, then by all means...drive that stake through my heart. Truly become what you are and take what you must. That is how you survive this life…”

There was that phrase again. You did not like it, did not like the way it made you feel, and with a disgusted gasp, you dropped the stake. You held your hands up and away from Steve, chest heaving as you shook your head.

“No...no. That is...not how I wish to survive this life,” you told him.

You chanced a glance at him, finding that his eyes had darkened considerably. With a growl, the stake was in his hand, and he had flipped you, hovering over you as you trembled beneath him.

“Then you are weak!”

“Fine!”

He had not expected that response, and he looked taken aback. His fair hair brushed his forehead, thin shirt hanging off of his shoulder as he frowned at you.

“Fine...then I am weak. Call me whatever you like, Steve, but that is not me...and it shall never be me.”

You could feel the tip of the stake pressing into you through the fabric of your gown, and you swallowed, eyes boring into his.

“If you wish to drive that stake through my heart, to take what you want, then you may do so, but that is not who I am,” you quietly said. “I am not you.”

As much as you wished you could be, you were not like Steve. God knows that you hated him, and a part of you even hated James too, but killing Steve would hurt James, and you could not do that. You would not be able to live with yourself. Steve stared at you for a long time, and for a moment you thought that he would, but all too soon, you heard the piece of wood clatter to the floor. He remained hovering over you, hand on your neck now, and you swallowed as a shudder passed through you. His chambers were quiet as you simply stared at one another, and you thought to yourself how horrible it was that someone so demented could be so beautiful. Life was most cruel.

“I hate you,” you suddenly whispered.

Your words did not affect him, but you repeated them anyway.

“I hate you so much. I do not think you can ever imagine just how much I truly hate you, Steve,” you mumbled, tears kissing your eyes.

The king leaned down, nose brushing along yours as he hummed. Your lashes fluttered, hating the way heat swirled in your gut with his movements.

“I shall never forgive you.”

“It is not your forgiveness I seek,” he said.

He settled in between your legs, forcing them around his waist as his lips pressed against your neck.

“Then what do you seek from me…?”

His sharp teeth grazed your throat, and you curled your hands into fists, nails pressing into your palms. Your world was suddenly spinning, and you found yourself on top of Steve yet again. One of his hands pressed into your waist, holding you to him while you laid your palms on his chest. Even in the dark, the blue of his eyes appeared darker. Just as you were about to move to get off of him, he sat up, pressing his chest to yours.

“I-.”

Your words died on your tongue when he pressed his thumb to your mouth, scraping it over your teeth, and your eyes rolled when his blood fell onto your tongue.

“Show me how much you hate me,” he purred, leaning in to sink his own teeth into the skin just above your breast, piercing it through the fabric of your gown.

You had your way with Steve that night, hips moving over his as you sought out your climax again and again. You bit him, scratched him, left marks on every piece of flesh you could get your hands on, and he welcomed it all. Steve enjoyed a bit of pain, you realized, and you were shocked to find out just how much you enjoyed giving it to him.

By the time you were done, the sun peaking through the window, the sheets were stained with blood. Steve was fast asleep, breathing faint, and you were leaving his chambers, feeling a bit shameful in your bloody gown from the night before. You were surprised to find James awaiting you when you entered the corridor, and you jumped a bit, pressing a hand to your chest.

You were unsure of what to say. For some reason, you thought James would be mad, but then you remembered that this is what he wanted. You frowned as he approached you, leaning in to press his lips to yours, tasting Steve’s blood on them. He did not completely pull away, and you felt the corner of his mouth lift.

“Good girl,” he whispered.

You reared back, eyeing him and the small smirk on his lips, and you suddenly wondered just how coincidental your night with Steve was...or if outside forces had come into play.

You glided through the sea of bodies, the flashing lights doing little to obstruct your vision. The club was otherwise dark, everyone around you too preoccupied with drugs or alcohol or the person next to them. Steve and James were currently knocked out at home, and while vampire blood quelled the thirst, it wasn’t what your body lived on. Venturing out for a few hours wouldn’t hurt anyone...or so you intended.

Unimpressed with the slim pickings before you, you exited the club. It was a nice summer night, but it would be much nicer if you could find something quick to eat. You heard the footsteps behind you as you made your way to your car parked on the side of the street, but you didn’t think much of it. At least, not until a warm hand wrapped around your wrist. You spun, eyes wide and confused.

The man before you had a fair complexion, hair dark and eyes darker. His facial hair was tasteful, jawline sharp, and under different circumstances, you might have found him attractive, but he wreaked of malicious intentions. You only discovered what those intentions were when he pushed against you. You allowed him to, looking at him like he had a death wish as he pinned you to your car.

“I saw you inside the club,” he said.

“...and?” you wondered, raising an eyebrow at him.

“Just a bit surprised to see a girl like you all alone… Dressed like that, you must be looking for something,” he grinned.

You scoffed, pushing against him.

“Get lost, creep.”

He snatched your hand, applying what you were sure he thought was painful pressure. You glowered at him as he pressed himself more firmly against you, and you could feel him hot and hard beneath his jeans.

“I really hate teases like you, you know,” he sneered. “You come out dressed like whores, knowing exactly what you look like, what kind of attention you’re looking for, and then when you get it… You get all surprised on us.”

You tilted your head at him, eyes narrowing.

“Nobody plays hard to get anymore. We see right through it.”

You pressed your lips together, mind whirling as you looked away. With a smirk, you leaned up and pressed your lips to his. He groaned into your mouth, tight grip still on your hand. When you pulled back, you licked your lips, brushing your nose against his.

“You caught me,” you chuckled. “Wanna come back to my place? I’ll drive.”

He grinned at you with a nod, taking a step back. By the time you got behind the wheel, he was already seated. He whistled at the interior of the car, and you threw him a sly smile as you started it.

“This yours?”

“It’s my ex’s,” you told him with a shrug.

It wasn’t a lie. James had been your ex at the time, angry with him for something you could hardly recall. The not-so-breakup breakup lasting a few months before Steve intervened. You just didn’t mention that you and said ex were happily back together.

The would be rapist talked the entire way as you sped down the road to upstate New York. If he took note of the long commute, he didn’t comment on it. Then again, why would he? He was far too preoccupied with getting laid. When you pulled up in front of the large and isolated mansion, you noticed the way his eyes briefly widened. The corner of your lips lifted just a bit as you took note of the way his heart skipped a beat.

The house was quiet, lighting dim when you entered, and you wondered if they were still asleep. You hoped not. You knew they had to be hungry. Before you could think more on it, the man behind you, Brock was what he called himself, wrapped his arms around you, pulling you against him. You didn’t react as he pressed kisses to your neck, your hungry eyes looking around for any sign of Steve or James instead.

“This is a nice place, kind of big for one woman.” he commented.

Footsteps reached your ears, far too soft for him to notice, and you bit your lip, fighting a smile.

“I agree,” you breathed, spinning around to cover his lips with your own.

His hands were tight on your waist, lips hungry and tongue searching, and the only reason disgust didn’t fill you was because you knew this would be worth it in only a matter of seconds.

“Doll…?”

You pulled away, ignoring the look on Brock’s face as you turned to grin at Steve. Your hands were on the raven-haired man’s face, your own visage practically glowing.

“Stevie,” you coolly responded.

You didn’t miss the way his eyes darkened as he took in the way the strange man held you, and your stomach flipped. You skipped towards him, hanging onto his arm as he continued to stare at the other man, a thousand ways to kill him running through his head, no doubt.

“What is the meaning of this?” he quietly demanded.

“What the fuck is going on?”

You ignored Brock, pouting at the blond man.

“He thought he could make me do whatever he wanted, Steve,” you whispered.

His head snapped towards you, jaw clenching as he ran his eyes over you. He knew that you were more than capable of taking care of yourself, but it was a habit he had no intentions of breaking.

“...so...I thought I’d bring him home…”

A smirk danced along his lips.

“Is that so?” he wondered, slowly turning to face the other man who was seconds away from leaving.

Too quickly for his eye to see, Steve was upon him, a hand digging into his shoulder. Brock barely had time to make any kind of noise before your husband was brutally tearing into his throat. You quietly approached them as Steve greedily drank from the skeevy man. He was dead by the time you reached them, and Steve lifted his head towards you, face stained, blood crawling down his neck.

He growled before smashing his lips against yours. You were reluctant to admit that the dead scum tasted better than you thought he would, but fear always did make the blood taste sweeter. You heard his body drop to the ground as Steve pressed his hands into your neck, tongue tasting the inside of your mouth while yours tasted the blood on his. You only pulled away when you heard a sigh, and you both turned to face James at the bottom of the stairs.

“What have I said about in the house?”

He sounded exasperated, but didn’t look particularly upset. You had the distinct feeling that he heard everything, and the reluctant smile that found its way onto his lips confirmed that. He beckoned you over, and you complied.

“Still mad at me?” he wondered, pinching your chin.

“No,” you said, shaking your head.

He pecked your lips.

“Good. I’ll help you get rid of that, Steve...and my love?”

He had brushed past you, and you turned to look at him expectantly.

“Yes…?”

“Never in the house,” he lightly scolded.

You returned his scowl with a grin.

The shard broke off deep into his neck, and Steve hissed, reaching to dig it out just as you plunged the other half into his chest.

“Fucking hell!”

Your palm connected with his cheek just before he shoved himself away from you, and you were determined to follow when strong familiar arms wrapped around you from behind, pinning your arms at your side.

“Let go of me,” you cried.

“Y/N-.”

“Let. Go. Of. Me!”

James did not listen, and instead you found yourself pinned to the wall, his arms preventing you from moving. You glared past his shoulder, trying in vain to kill Steve with your vision alone. The blond winced as he tore the broken glass from his neck, blood soaking into his shirt.

“He killed him,” you spat, lips trembling as the pain in your chest flared with the reminder of what Steve had done.

The man in question snapped his head up, eyes dark with anger and jealousy while his lip curled over his teeth.

“And I would happily do it again,” he sneered.

“He was my friend!”

“He coveted you,” Steve hissed, face only a hair’s width away from your own now. “You would think that after 400 plus years on this God forsaken earth, you would realize that.”

You frantically shook your head.

“No. Not everyone is like you, Steve. Not everyone has the worst intentions,” you screamed.

Steve simply rolled his eyes, turning away as he removed his shirt. You looked to James for help, anything to back you up, but he did not look the least bit remorseful about what Steve had done. He sighed, and you frowned.

“I gave Steve the okay,” he quietly confessed.

Your eyes widened, and you stumbled back out of his now loose hold. You stared at him in confusion, fighting to understand what he was telling you.

“W-what? You...you told him to kill Clint?”

James did not respond, and you swallowed, a sharp pain traveling through your chest.

“...why?” you softly asked. “He was my friend. He made me laugh, he listened to me…”

You ignored Steve’s scoff, and James reached out to brush his thumb over your chin.

“We cannot get attached to humans.”

“You did,” you threw at him. “Or have you forgotten how I ended up in this situation to begin with?”

Anger briefly flashed over his features, and you tilted your head at him.

“That was different-.”

“How so? Was it different because you can do whatever you want while I cannot? Or is it different because you felt threatened by him?”

James pressed his chest to yours, staring you down with a look you had never been on the receiving end of before. You shuddered, and he took another step forward, forcing you back.

“Threatened by a mere human who we snuffed out like it was nothing?”

“I enjoyed being around him. I enjoyed learning about the ever changing world. He reminded me of a life that Steve so cruelly ripped away from me, and you hated it,” you whispered.

James’ silence spoke volumes.

“Admit it. You were terrified that I would...what...turn him? Then run off into the sunset, leaving the two of you behind?”

Now it was your turn to scoff.

“How quickly you forget that I am nothing like you...and that I could never do to someone else what you have done to me,” you snidely told him.

James sharply inhaled, straightening to his full height.

“You are ours, and it will remain that way until the end of time.”

You looked down, but James’ hand on your chin forced you to hold his uncharacteristically cold gaze.

“...and Steve and I will kill whomever we see fit to ensure nothing disrupts that.”

You snatched your face out of his grip, tears in your eyes.

“He did not taste half bad. You should have drank from him when you had the chance,” Steve chuckled.

Only a moment later, your hands were on his face, and he collapsed at your feet. Anger coursed through you as you stared down at him, wishing you had the strength and callousness to drive a stake through his heart. James heaved a sigh from behind you, and you felt him approach.

“You cannot keep doing that every time he upsets you, my love.”

You turned to face him, frown deepening when he placed his hand on your cheek. You copied him, placing your other hand on his other cheek, before breaking his neck with a grimace. You scoffed, shaking your head at them both before storming out of the room.

The storm raged around you as you stared down into the overgrown grass. Centuries upon centuries had passed, and while it was certainly not as grand as it had once been, the basic structure of the castle remained. You had no doubt that in the years to come, it would be a tourist attraction. Nothing else from the building mattered much. The only thing that was of some importance, the balcony, remained, and that was all that you cared about.

You pressed your hand to your lips as you looked around, feeling like it was only yesterday that you had been here. If you thought hard enough, you could recall the early days of your marriage, filled with innocence and naivety. You could even recall the respect and admiration you’d had for Steve then, back when he was a king. Your relationship with the blond was much more complicated these days than you cared to admit.

And if you really relaxed, really thought hard enough, you could see her smile. You could see the way her hair caught the sun, looking almost red at times. You could hear her laugh at some jest that was far too inappropriate for a woman to make back then. If you thought hard enough, you could see...her.

You didn’t realize that you had closed your eyes until they snapped open at the familiar warmth in your chest that was growing by the minute. You hadn’t intended to bond with Steve that night, it sort of just happened, and the damage had been done. At least he had taught you how to feel his presence deep within your chest, a warmth that was always there but had not realized was James...and now Steve too. It was how James always found you every time you took off. You didn’t like that he’d hidden that from you…

You didn’t need to turn around to know that he was there. You could feel him like he was touching you instead of way on the other side of the room. He didn’t say anything, and you got the feeling that James had grown worried, had told him to come find you. After all, it had been a few months since you last saw them. It was how you coped when you couldn’t stand to look at their faces. You could feel Steve’s surprise at finding you here.

“Why did you kill her?” you suddenly wondered, voice quiet.

The rain was loud, words drowned out even more as you were on the balcony, but you knew that he heard you all the same.

“I loved her...and you took her away from me. Why?”

“...because I couldn’t control her,” he eventually responded, equally low voice reaching your ears.

Steve didn’t sound boastful, he didn’t even sound satisfied with himself. In fact, the vampire behind you almost sounded regretful.

“...and me?”

You blinked, tears skipping down your face as you finally turned to face him. Your eyes met his, and his jaw clenched as he took note of the way your own shined.

“Why did you kill me?”

Steve didn’t answer, and you stumbled towards him.

“Why, Steve? You...you threw me off of that balcony. You took my life into your hands, and you just crushed it! Like it was nothing… You killed me.”

“I know-.”

“You killed me!”

You shoved him, and he let you. He swallowed, reaching for you. It was always so fresh in your mind. Your fear, the cruel smirk on his face, his heartlessness...and then the pain. The way he laughed when you had killed your maid. Mary Jane. So many had died as the result of his own selfish desires...

“I know, I know.”

“You killed me, Steve,” you cried, hitting his chest, his shoulders, his face.

He merely blinked as you slapped him again. You could feel his own regret and his own despair and it made you angrier. It was centuries too late.

“You killed me, you killed me, you killed me,” you repeatedly sobbed, shoving him and shaking him over and over again. “Why?”

You fisted your hands into his shirt, yanking him.

“Why did you kill me, Steve? Why...why did you do that to me?” you shakily mumbled, lips trembling.

Steve pressed his hand into the back of your head, the other at the small of your back, and you fought against him.

“You were going to leave us,” he reluctantly said. “You were going to leave me…”

You didn’t meet his eyes as he pressed his forehead to yours.

“My feelings then may have been just as complicated as they are now, but I only knew that I couldn't let you leave,” he confessed.

You shook your head, a sob caught in your throat.

“You would have tried again...and you would have succeeded,” he breathed.

He was right. You both knew that he was right, and you would have tried again. After all, at the time, you thought it was your only way to get away from him. Steve’s lips sought out yours, and you turned your head away. His regret threatened to suffocate you.

“I’m sorry,” he exhaled.

You shook your head again, turning away every time he reached for your face.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” he whispered, lips finding yours.

Your back hit the wall, and you could feel his own lips trembling against yours. Your salty tears mixed in with the kiss, and you cried harder at your despair, his regret, and your inability to change the past.

“Forgive me,” he pleaded into your mouth.

“No,” you whispered back.

His lips traveled to your jaw and then your neck before kissing the fabric of your dress as Steve fell to his knees, begging for your forgiveness every step of the way.

“Forgive me, forgive me,” he chanted.

Your hands tangled in his hair as he fiercely kissed your stomach, pressing his face into your dress as he continued to beg for your forgiveness. You never thought you’d see the day where Steve would be on his knees, begging you to forgive him. After all, once upon a time, he’d told you that your forgiveness was not what he sought...and once upon a time, you said you’d never give it.

As your fingers tightened in his hair, you thought to yourself that perhaps you could forgive him. You could feel his remorse, feel how what he’d done had been eating at him. It had been doing so for quite some time, but you’d always tried to ignore it. You never thought a day would come where you’d even consider forgiving him for making your life hell, killing Peggy...killing you, but as his pleas reached your ears, you were tempted to give in. Maybe you would forgive him some day…

In one quick movement, you’d snapped Steve’s neck, and he heavily fell at your feet. You stood against the wall, trembling and crying. Your fingers shook, and in all the years you’d done that whenever Steve made you incredibly angry, for the first time ever, it did not bring you joy.

Maybe you would forgive Steve someday...but today was not that day.

Your watchful eyes followed the children as they ran across the street. Despite their ratty clothing and dirty faces, bright smiles adorned their lips as they laughed and played with one another. The owner of the orphanage, a kind and homely woman, ushered them along. You caught her eye and she waved. You returned it with a smile, James and Steve hardly paying you mind as they conversed about their investments.

You had more money than you could ever dream of, so you donated to the orphanage often. The children who always lived there always looked their best now, but you could see that these kids were new. You watched the way they played amongst each other, running around Ms. Jane, their giggles reaching your ears as she fought to settle them down.

“My love?”

You were pulled from the scene at the sound of James’ voice. His brows were furrowed, and he looked concerned.

“Are you alright…?”

You nodded at him.

“Of course.”

It wasn’t entirely a lie, but it wasn’t entirely true either. You were certain that James could feel that, and that was probably why his face briefly pinched before it smoothed out. He reached past Steve to brush a finger over your cheek, a small smile on his lips just before he turned away. You quickly glanced at the children again before tightening your hold on Steve’s arm.

“Steve…”

You glanced to him just as he turned to look at you, raising an eyebrow.

“Can vampires procreate?”

You didn’t like to ask James these things. He had a habit of withholding information from you or even just downright sugarcoating things. You could feel his eyes on you, and you ignored his gaze as you waited for Steve to answer. He threw you a strained smile.

“No...but we sure love to try,” he joked, and you reluctantly chuckled.

You looked away from him, and he brushed a finger over the back of your hand.

“Why do you ask?”

Your eyes strayed to the laughing children again, and you shrugged.

“Just curious, I guess…”

You could feel their concern, but you ignored it, and days later, the conversation was forgotten altogether. But every now and then, you thought about those children, about where they lived. Despite the fact that you’d put a lot of money into the place, they still deserved a proper home.

Steve and James were gone when you left. It was late, and they were meeting with shady businessmen, no doubt. Times were different. It was the 1910’s, an age of cars and alcohol and money, and every man wanted to do business with the elusive Steve Rogers and James Barnes. You smirked to yourself, thinking on how everyone thought them to be descendants of royal blood, unaware that they were indeed the original royal blood everyone thought them to be related to.

The night was cold, not that you could tell, but the frost on the windows and the shivers from the men that you passed told you so. You ignored the strange looks they gave you, a woman such as yourself out so late by your lonesome? That was one thing that hadn’t changed in the years to come. The orphanage was in a better part of town, away from the seedy bar and brothel, no predatory and violent men around to disturb the peace of the children.

You could hear a horse and carriage far off in the distance as you stared up at the building. All of the windows were covered with curtains, and when you listened closely, you could hear the calm and even heartbeats of all the children inside. All except one. You frowned when the door opened and a little boy stood in the open doorway with an empty pail. His eyes widened at the sight of you before a smile eventually graced his lips.

“H-hello,” he hesitantly stuttered.

You stared at him for a long while, blinking at him before eventually squatting to meet him at eye level. He couldn’t have been any older than seven.

“Hi,” you breathed. “What are you doing up so late?”

If he was frightened by your sharp teeth, he did not show it. His heart didn’t even stutter. He held up the bucket with a shrug.

“I wanted to get some water for in the morning, so that Ms. Jane wouldn’t have to,” he told you.

You let out a light laugh.

“That is so sweet. What is your name?”

“Billy…”

You quietly repeated it to yourself, and you stared at him, your heart already making your next decision for you before your mind could catch up. You slowly stood, extending your hand towards him with an inviting smile.

“Are you hungry, Billy?”

You got the feeling that he was going to protest, but his stomach told on him before he got the chance.

“Yes, ma’am,” he said with a nod, looking sheepish.

Your smile widened, and your heart soared when he stumbled towards you, placing his smaller hand in yours. As you walked him back to the house, he told you of how Ms. Jane did the best she could with the donations, but the orphanage was filling up with more and more kids each year. He was fairly new, only having been there for all of three months. He marveled at your mansion, brown eyes alight with wonder.

He was well behaved, waiting patiently while you fixed him something to eat. You were happy that he was comfortable with you, talking your ear off the entire time. You made sure to fix him a hearty soup, filled with vegetables and plenty of meat. He didn’t seem to mind as you studied him, far too engrossed in the food before him.

You hadn’t realized how much time had passed.

“Y/N.”

Startled, you turned, looking up to find James and Steve standing in the entryway to the living room. Billy and you were on the floor, the fire lit to keep him warm, and you hurriedly stood. James hardly ever called you by your name, and you did not need to look within yourself to know that he was angry. It was written all over his face.

“Is that your name?” Billy asked you.

You turned to him with a strained smile and nod.

“You stay right here, okay?”

You ruffled his hair, and he smiled at you with an obedient nod. You swallowed as you turned to approach James and Steve, not missing the way James’ eyes never left you. You could feel their worry, and that confused you.

“What have you done?” James demanded, and you flinched at his tone.

“I…”

You gestured to Billy.

“There are so many children in the orphanage, so I-.”

“So you brought him here? To a house full of vampires?”

He talked to you like you were stupid, and you looked to Steve for help, but his own face was pinched with worry, blue eyes flickering between you and the boy.

“We can raise him,” you quietly said. “He’ll never have to want for anything-.”

“No,” James snapped.

“James-.”

“You could have killed him. Exposed all of us,” he argued. “What were you thinking?”

“I was thinking that he could be ours,” you weakly replied, hating the way your voice trembled.

James’ eyes softened, shoulders sagging as he heaved a sigh. You looked to Steve, the blond the more open minded of the two, eyes pleading as you reached for him.

“Steve…? Tell him, Steve,” you said, pushing yourself against him. “Let me keep him.”

Steve’s eyes landed on James, the dark-haired man almost daring Steve to say something.

“Let’s just think about it-.”

“Absolutely not. We’ll be lucky if no one has already noticed his absence…”

“No,” you breathed. “James, no.”

“I’m taking him back. Now,” he hissed, brushing past you.

“No,” you cried, standing in his way. “I hardly ask you for anything.”

James’ eyes widened at your uncharacteristic behavior, and you clutched his shirt.

“...and I should. I should ask you for the world. I deserve it! I can take care of him, James.”

Your voice was small, and James gave you a regretful look before glancing away.

“Let me have this one thing,” you softly begged.

James was quiet, so was Steve, and the only sound was that of Billy finishing his food. James clenched his jaw, nostrils flaring before finally speaking.

“Steve.”

You fought in Steve’s hold as he grabbed you, holding you back as James approached Billy. You screamed as he stared into the boy’s eyes, Billy falling asleep only moments later, James catching him with ease.

“Fuck you, James,” you spat as he passed you. “Fuck you!”

You could feel the pain that your words caused, but you didn’t care. You turned to press your face into Steve’s chest as the door slammed shut, collapsing in his arms. He tightened his arms around you, shushing you as sobs wracked your frame.

“You could have killed him.”

“I wouldn’t, I wouldn’t have done that-.”

“You don’t know that,” he said. “You’re still fairly young. You could have easily killed him, and then what?”

You shoved yourself away from Steve, wrapping your arms around yourself as you sniffed.

“You did this to me,” you mumbled.

It was an old argument. You and Steve were in a far better place than what you used to be, but you were still so far from where you could be. You looked to him, eyes hard and lip curling over your teeth.

“I wanted kids. I always wanted kids, and you took that away from me…”

Steve sighed, looking down.

“I want to blame you...but the truth is...a part of me hates James too,” you confessed.

“Y/N-.”

“...because the truth is...that life was gone the moment James decided that I was to be his.”

Steve reached for you, but you stepped away. Your eyes briefly fluttered close, a soft scoff escaping your lips.

“It’s not fair,” you whispered, shaking your head. “It’s not fair.”

You flurried past him, slamming your shoulder into his as you passed by.

Steve’s hold was almost bruising on your hips, his own pushing up into yours over and over again with every thrust. You dug your nails into his chest, head thrown back to accommodate for James, his lips tasting the skin of your neck and shoulder. Your lashes fluttered as you clenched around Steve, and James’ nails pressed into your skin.

“I don’t like that he touched you,” he murmured against your skin.

You sighed when Steve wrapped his lips around a hardened bud.

“It was a means to an end…”

James hummed, Steve far too preoccupied with the way his cock slid in and out of you.

“...and if I had to seduce some other woman as a means to an end?” he wondered.

His tone was teasing, and you all knew he wasn’t serious, but you froze anyway, turning your head to stare into his eyes. Your own hardened considerably, and James chuckled at the fire in your eyes.

“A bit of a double standard, no?”

“James,” Steve dragged out, frustrated that you’d stopped moving. “Why must you choose now of all times to upset her?”

“It was a simple question,” the dark-haired man said with a shrug.

“The day you seduce someone else, a means to an end or not, is the day I finally drive a stake through your heart,” you calmly told him.

James smirked, brushing his lips over yours.

“Come now, my love. I was only teasing…”

With a devious smile of your own, you twisted your hand into his hair, thankful that he’d never cut it too short, before forcing him onto his back beside Steve. You dragged your nails along his chest, drawing blood and taking great satisfaction in the way he’d hissed. You moved your hips over Steve’s as you leaned over to glide your tongue over his skin, James moaning at the feel. Your teeth ached, the desire to sink your teeth into him strong. Your lips moved against his heaving chest as you spoke.

“I don’t joke about what’s mine.”

tags: @mcudarklibrary @harryspet @xoxabs88xox @darkficreposter @opheliadawnwalker3 @honeychicanawrites @honeychicana @nickyl316h @captainchrisstan @sebabestianstan101 @readermia @villanellevi @lokislastlove @notyourtypicalrose @coconutqueen21 @hurricanerin @buckybarnesplumwhore @quaksonhehe @nerdygirl8203 @patzammit @mandiiblanche @cocoamoonmalfoy @mrsdeanwinchester19 @ahoemine @9daykrisr

#dark steve rogers #dark bucky barnes #dark steve x reader #dark bucky x reader #vampire!stucky #Dark fics #marvel fanfiction #Steve Rogers #Bucky Barnes #steve rogers x reader #bucky barnes x reader #stucky x reader

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littlemissnoname13 · 3 years

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hii i wanted to request a draco/reader fic w the dynamic that 1 day they meet at a bar and have a 1 night stand, and then » 2 months later draco is at mungo's and runs into y/n who has just found out she is pregnant w his kid but she's scared to tell him. and he feels a connection to her that tells him she's carrying his child and he asks her out bc they kinda like each other. Pl do if your comfortable only tyia

Hi my nonnie! Thanks for requesting.🖤

This was so much fun to write. Especially the bar part. This is a long one so brace yourself. I hope you like it.

A very special shoutout to @mellifluousart for giving me helpful pointers for this fic. You are the best!

Terrible at Small Talk (D.Malfoy x Reader) 18+

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x reader

Warnings: some fluff smut, mature Language and themes, nsfw, drinking, penetrative sex, breeding kink, pregnancy, 18+

Word count: 2396

~~~~~~~~~~

You swirled what remained of your drink in your glass making the amber liquid spin round and round and round.

Even after two whole hours waiting on a tall bar stool in a dead little muggle bar, and your date was still nowhere to be seen.

The previous hour had gone by pretty quickly in comparison to the first hour though. You'd been drinking whisky on the rocks and your insides were warming up little by little making the waiting game a tad bit more bearable.

You couldn’t tell if it was the alcohol but you chuckled to yourself thinking about what you had done in life to lead you there, in a strange little pub waiting for a boy you weren’t even sure was coming.

“One more of these please.” You called out to the bartender, smiling politely and shaking your empty glass.

“I’ll have what she’s having.”

An all too familiar voice made all the hairs on your back stand up straight. Your goosebumps were probably highly visible from the back of your backless red dress.

“Well, well, if it isn’t y/l/n in the flesh.” He muttered, sitting down on the bar stool next to you and you didn’t dare to turn to your side to look at him.

You didn’t even need to.

You knew who this voice belonged to and it sure as hell wasn’t your date.

“Well, Hello to you too, Malfoy.” You said, finally turning your head towards him. “I didn’t know you liked to frequent muggle bars on the weekends.”

You hadn’t seen him after the wizarding war. He had gone off the grid.

He still looked the same and yet, completely different.

His suit was still all black but his jaw had gotten more chiseled, his hair remained the same but he now donned glasses. He still wore his silver rings and you could see what looked like a tattoo peeking out of his suit sleeves.

“Nice glasses.” You blurted.

“Nice hair.” He muttered, as the bartender handed you your drinks. He eyed you intently before taking a prolonged swig of his drink. “Although, I preferred it the way it was in school.”

“So did I.” You smiled weakly at him, running your hands through your hair, suddenly feeling very conscious.

“Why did you change it though?—I used to love your hair.” He cleared his throat and tried to backtrack from his sudden confession. “Not that you don’t look good now.”

You needed a fresh start after Hogwarts, the war and life in general but you didn’t think he needed to hear all that.

“Wanted something new I guess.” You said in a very composed tone as you gulped down your beverage and asked the bartender to keep the drinks coming.

He hummed and downed his drink matching your own speed.

Soon enough, you had created a row of empty glasses at the counter.

Both of you terrible at small talk.

“It’s so strange seeing you of all people at a muggle bar.” You said, your voice slowly getting slurry with a hint of inebriation and a tinge of madness.

He didn’t say a word, he simply blinked at you with a blankness in his stormy grey eyes, now hidden behind thick frames.

“Well, I don’t think I am welcomed at most pubs around Diagon alley—not after the war anyway.” He muttered. “Besides, I could have asked you the same question.”

“Well, if you must know, I got stood up.” You laughed. “Not that I wanted to come—my friends have been pushing me to go out there and meet people.”

He kept glaring at you as you kept babbling. His eyes secretly trailing to your bare back as he tried his hardest to ignore his blood rushing and his heart thumping.

A few more glasses of whisky later, you found yourself walking to the nearest apparition point with him.

And just as you tried to quicken your strides, you missed your footing but he caught firmly by the shoulder before you could hit the ground, face first.

“Merlin! That was a close one.” You whispered softly as you wondered why his hands were still grasping your shoulders.

Even after all these years, the smell of mint, and his expensive cologne remained the same; his eyes still conflicted.

The warmth and the confidence from the alcohol made you lean in and capture his lips in yours.

A slow, speculative kind of kiss. Like you were testing the waters; taking a small sip of tea to see if the temperature was alright.

After you leaned away, he opened his eyes.

The conflict inside his eyes was now replaced by a full fledged hurricane of emotions.

“C’mhere.” He said hoarsely as he grasped the hair on the back of your neck and pulled your face flush against his.

His left hand held one of your legs and wrapped it around his torso—your clothed cunt making contact with the hardened bulge in his pants.

By the time your eyes opened, Draco had already apparted you to the Malfoy manor.

As soon as he laid you down on his bed, he hastily began working on his shirt buttons.

With each button, you could see more and more of his ivory skin, his toned abdomen, the veins protruding along his forearm, his faded dark mark now covered with tattoos.

You propped yourself up on your elbows on the bed while he leaned in for another kiss and you took this opportunity to remove the glasses that hid the vehemence in his eyes.

His lips soon made their way towards your earlobes and he began nipping and tugging with his teeth while his hands roamed underneath your dress.

“The things I want to do to you…….”

“Draco….” You sighed as his fingers started to move up and down your clothed slit before pushing the fabric of your panty aside .

“Gods, y/n…” he groaned as he slowly pushed a finger inside. “The things I want to do to this pretty little cunt….”

“Then do it..” You whined bucking your hips at him. “Please just do it…”

“This dress...” He growled into your ear as he added a second finger inside of you. “I've wanted to rip it off your body since the moment I laid my eyes on you…”

His fingers kept moving in and out while his thumb kept rubbing circles into your clit. “You are so fucking wet darling.”

“Mmmhmm..” you whimpered, barely managing to nod your head.

“Tell me y/n…” he murmured against your slit; his tongue circling your swollen bud. “Who made you this wet?”

“You did Draco..” you whimpered. “You did.”

You were so close.

So fucking close.

Just when you felt like you were going to come all over his fingers he stopped and took his fingers out.

“No please..don’t stop..” You whined, suddenly feeling empty without his fingers.

“Take your clothes off.” He commanded, backing away and you instantly found yourself complying to his request in a matter of seconds.

No one had ever talked to you that way.

This was dark, this was seductive, this had your cunt dripping with anticipation.

“Fuck y/n. You are a sight for sore eyes.” He murmured while he pulled your hips towards the edge of the bed.

A small smirk played at his lips as his hands quickly undid the buckle of his belt to let himself out and you gasped at the sight of him.

Rumors always traveled fast at Hogwarts. You’d heard stories about him—his length, the way he made girls scream.

Only, they weren’t just rumors.

Everything you’d heard about him was true.

All the fucking rumors about his length, his size they were all true.

He moved his fist up and down his shaft and lined himself up against your entrance. Your eyes met for a second. “Are you okay with this?” He asked and you caressed his cheeks and nodded.

“I am more than okay Draco….”

And just like that, he pushed himself inside of you, cursing under his breath.

“Oh god….Draco…”

“The way you say my name y/n…” He grunted into the crook of your neck while your fingers entangled themselves into this hair. “It makes me want to fuck you harder…makes me want to fill you up with my come…”

“Draco Please…”

“Fuck y/n….don’t.. don’t say my name like that.. I won’t be able to control myself...

“Then don’t…” You pleaded with your head snapped back and your back arched when his thumb found your clit. “I want to feel you cum Draco..I need to..”

It was like these words were automatically slipping out of your lips as you reached closer and closer to your climax.

“What are you doing to me….y/n…” he groaned as he fucked you harder and harder. “Why do you feel so fucking good…”

“Draco..don’t stop..don’t stop till you are cumming for me..” you wrapped your legs around his torso allowing him a deeper angle.

“Won’t stop…I won’t fucking stop till I fill you up..”

Draco stayed true to his words.

He didn’t stop till you were sore and leaking with his release.

The both of you even woke up in the middle of the night for another round of rigorous sex and he silently thanked your date for pulling a no show that night.

Now he could have you all to himself. Well, until the sun came up that is.

When Draco woke up the next morning he tried to reach for you but you were long gone.

The only thing that remained was the smell of your perfume on his sheets and your stray earring on the floor.

He slowly reached for the forgotten earring and held it in the palm of his hands.

Sure, it was a one night stand but he sure as hell wanted another night with you.

~~~~~~~

Two months had gone by and Draco found himself staring at your earrings on his nightstand every day.

He was never the one to overthink about one night stands and yet, here he was, clasping onto your earring for dear life.

After reminding himself to get a grip on himself, Draco buttoned up his shirt and made his way towards St. Mungo's hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries.

He’d been a regular donor for the hospital since the end of the wizarding war and visited the hospital every other month.

Just like every other month, the hospital was terribly busy that day too.

But somewhere in between the hustle and bustle, somewhere in between the dissonance of sounds, the wind, the atmosphere he felt something different that particular day—Something familiar.

He brushed the feeling off and finished up the paperwork in less than an hour before making a swift exit from the hospital.

But every step he took away from St Mungos added to the inexplicable restlessness that crushed his insides. The feeling mimicked the feeling of missing a train he was supposed to catch.

“Oh For fuck’s sake.” He muttered to himself before turning back around and sprinting his way back into the hospital, crashing into annoyed people that cursed at him along the way.

He finally stopped running when he made it to a quiet corridor in the hospital. With his hand flat on his chest, Draco tried to catch his breath.

Everything was silent for a minuscule second until he heard a voice coming from a room a few steps ahead of him.

Draco knew he could recognise that voice anywhere in this whole entire planet.

It was the same voice that had been haunting his mind and infiltrating his existence since that night at the bar.

You had a worried expression on your pretty features as the healer kept talking to you.

“Everything looks good y/n, your vitals, the baby.” Said the healer and you placed your hand lightly on your stomach.

Draco didn’t even hear what the healer said next. The accelerating sound of his heart was too loud.

Could it be?

Why didn’t you tell him?

Maybe the baby wasn’t his.

But why was he suddenly wishing it was—

“Draco?” You asked when you saw him standing outside the door.

The way you uttered his name, softly with your voice slightly cracking, felt like the break of dawn after a long cold night—You were his daylight.

“Sorry—I was just um passing by..” He said, hesitantly prying the door open.

“I’m sorry Mr. Malfoy, but you cannot be here unless you are family.” The healer said coldly, giving him a nod of disapproval.

“I guess I’ll be on my way then.” Draco mumbled with his eyes never leaving yours. “It was good seeing you—”

“Wait.” You called out before he could walk away and he eyed you quizzically. “Draco, there’s something you need to know.”

He held his breath and patiently waited for what you were doing to say next.

You looked even more beautiful than you did the last time he saw you. Your cheeks were dewy, your eyes a bit glassy and his most basic instincts were telling him that he needed to protect you no matter what. He didn’t even hear what the healer said as she excused herself from the room.

“Draco I’m—”

“I know.” He said softly as he let his finger tips trail the side of your face. “I heard everything.”

“Not everything.” You said as you held his other hand and gently placed it on your stomach.

Draco let out a sharp breath that he didn’t even realize he was holding back.

It was like he’d caught the train that he was so desperately trying to catch.

It was like he was finally headed home.

“Merlin! Y/n.” He gasped as he instantly cupped your face in his hands. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t know what to tell you. I didn’t know how you’d react and I was terrified.”

If only you knew just how happy he was.

If only he knew just how much he wanted to care for you and the baby.

If only you knew how he felt about you.

“I’m here now.” He whispered and placed a gentle kiss on your lips. “And I’m not going anywhere.”

“Thank you.” You murmured against his lips.

“Let me take you out y/n.” He murmured. “Let me take you to dinner tonight and we will figure the rest together.”

~~~~

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writemywaytoyourheart · 3 years

Text

Aim For The Heart | Chapter 16: Heartstrings

Pairing: hitman!jungkook x female reader

Genre: romance, drama, angst, fluff

WC: 7.3k

Warnings for this chapter: strong language, teenage heartbreak :(, two bumbling fools that are emotionally constipated, I think that’s it

summary; Jeon Jungkook is an infamous hitman, known for his inability to fail at whatever job is thrown his way. At least, up until now. Y/n, a kind-hearted and full of life teacher, is his newest target. Jeon isn’t sure who would put a hit on this seemingly innocent girl, but fortunately, that isn’t his problem. All he has to do is pull the trigger.

Previous > Next

6 years ago:

"Mina, I'm so nervous!"

Mina laughs lightly at the way you bounce up and down on your bed, "It'll be fine, ____! He'll totally like you back, girl don't even worry about it!"

You let out a nervous giggle as you jump off your bed and run to your closet, "What should I wear?"

"____, you literally have a school uniform," Mina laughs again.

You turn and pout at her, "Heyy, I know that! I was asking which one I should wear, the burgundy socks or the white ones? Tie or no tie? Blazer or no blazer? Long-sleeved or short?"

Mina shakes her head in amusement, "You're cute and he'll think so no matter what you wear," She rubs her chin in thought, "But definitely the white socks, the burgundy tie with the grey sweater vest instead of the blazer, and long sleeves."

You do a little dancy dance of excitement before grabbing the decided clothes out of your closet and hurrying to pull them on. Mina is already dressed in her uniform, waiting patiently as she sits on your bed.

When you're all ready to go, you grab the little box on your bedside table and run out of your room, causing Mina to stumble after you.

_______

By the time lunch rolls around, you're buzzing with excitement at the prospect of getting to see him.

Not to mention being able to finally tell him how you feel.

Mina is by your side the whole way to your locker as you grab the little box out.

She nudges your shoulder as you two walk to the cafeteria, "You can do this, ____."

You nod, your tummy all in knots to the point that you're not sure if you'll even be able to eat.

Despite that, you finish everything on your tray while your legs bounce in anticipation.

Once you two make your way outside to the field, you are trying your hardest not to hightail it back inside. Mina holds your arm though, preventing you from doing so.

"You can't back out now, babe."

Mina's words terrify you but you know she's telling the truth, you can't just go on without at least trying.

A bunch of kids are milling around outside, some of the boys showing off to the girls as they size how tall they are compared to each other.

Then you see him, in all his glory.

He's standing in the field with a few other boys from his class, chatting.

His dark blonde hair glistens in the sunlight as he laughs at something one of his friends said.

You feel your heart leap to your throat and you freeze, "I- I can't..."

"____," Mina turns to you, placing her hands on your shoulders, "I am not about to let you give up now, not right before you do it! Just go over there. If you can't speak, then just hand it to him, simple as that. He'll understand when he opens it anyway."

You nod stiffly, "What about his friends?" Your voice shakes, "I'm scared to do it in front of them."

Mina nods, "I got this."

You're about to protest but she's gone, already marching her way over to them.

You watch in embarrassment as Mina taps one of the boys on the shoulder. He turns and smiles when he sees her. Mina is gorgeous, of course he'd smile when she spoke to him.

You're really her only friend, as she is yours, but the boys are constantly swarming around her nonetheless.

You start to feel self-conscious when you see the boy making your heart thump heavily look at Mina and smile brightly.

Shoot, what if he likes her?

You can't compare to her.

Besides, she's your best friend, you'd give him up for her if she wanted him.

You'd do anything for her.

You snap out of it when you see Mina leading the two boys that were with him away, then she gestures at you behind her back.

You force your feet to move as you hurry over to him before he moves on to talk with someone else.

Just as he's turning, you're coming up.

He almost bumps into you, a surprised gasp slipping from his lips as he notices you.

"Oh, sorry! I didn't see you there."

You smile crookedly, "It's- It's fine!" You squeak out.

His smile widens as he looks at you, "You're ____, right? Tenth grade?"

You nod like a darn bobblehead, your words suddenly stuck in your throat.

He's so handsome.

And cute.

And sweet.

And thoughtful.

And-

"I'm Jimin," He reaches a hand out to you, "It's nice to officially meet you."

You take his hand, letting him shake it as his bright smile continues to beam.

"I know, um," You need to get it together, "You're in eleventh."

He nods, "Yes, only one and a half years left of these ridiculous uniforms," He chuckles.

You nod stupidly, "Uh, yeah," A nervous laugh slips from your mouth.

Just do it, rip it off like a band-aid.

"I uh- I have something for you."

He looks at you with curiosity, his pretty eyes glancing down to the box in your hands.

Then his smile fades.

Your heart stops in your chest when you see the look of recognition on his face.

He's been confessed to before, of course he has.

Your shoulders slump.

You just want the ground to open up and swallow you.

He looks back up at you and gives you a gentle smile.

The smile of rejection.

"____, you're really sweet-"

Oh, no.

"I would say yes in a heartbeat, really. You're different from the other girls here, you care about people, I can tell. I've seen it-"

"But?" Your voice comes out as a whisper.

His smile turns sad, "But there's a girl I like already. I'm sorry, ____."

It feels like someone just tore out your heart and stomped it into the ground.

You don't say anything.

You can't.

It hurts too much.

You just open the box and pull out the note, tucking it into your palm before closing the box again and handing it to him.

Jimin takes it reluctantly, still watching you carefully, his eyes sad and regretful.

"____-"

"I hope you like the cookies," You smile at him, finally meeting his eyes, "Just think of it as a friendship gift, nothing more."

Jimin nods, still looking guilty as hell.

"I hope it works out for you Jimin, I really do."

"Thank you, ____."

Then you turn and walk away, pieces of your heart falling behind you with each step you take.

A minute later you hear Mina calling to you, but you don't stop.

You hurry inside and to the locker rooms.

You're hiding in a stall when you hear the door to the girls' locker room open and Mina's voice call out, "____, are you in here?"

You don't answer and a moment later the door shuts, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

You curl up, pulling your knees to your chest as the tears finally come.

You wish you could just disappear.

The thought that you need to see him the rest of this school year and the next before he leaves is sickening.

Your heart has never hurt more than it does now, it feels like a bunch of swords are impaling it over and over again.

Fourth grade.

You had liked him since you were in fourth grade, he was in sixth.

It was the day that you had tripped and spilled your lunch tray all over yourself.

This angel had appeared, pulling you to your feet with the brightest smile you'd ever seen. He had taken you to get another uniform in the office and even got you another tray of food.

He only ever said hello in passing after that, but you were infatuated.

You thought you had loved him.

Another sob cuts through the silence in the locker room as you realize you don't want it anymore.

You hope you never fall for anyone again.

Love is just a terrible joke, made to hurt the weakest, the ones that fall for it.

________________

"____?"

The handsome man standing before you makes your heart lurch.

What kind of joke is this?

You take a step back and clear your throat, "P-P-Park J-Jimin?"

His smile returns as he lets out a small laugh of disbelief, "You remember me?"

You nod reluctantly.

Jimin looks into your eyes just like he did that one day in elementary school, an angel appearing out of nowhere to save you.

"But, how?" He asks, clearly bewildered, "After the accident, you never..."

You suddenly realize you're standing there like an idiot, so you open the door wider and gesture for him to come in.

He walks in and sets the pizza you ordered on your kitchen table.

"D-Do you have t-t-time to talk?" You ask bravely.

Jimin nods, "Of course."

You two end up on the couch, an awkward silence falling around you.

You can't look him in the eyes because every time you do, he's just staring at you like you're the lost puppy he'd been looking for for years.

"It's been so long," Jimin says quietly, "It's been like six years since we actually spoke."

You nod, "The d-d-day you rejected me."

When you look up at him he looks heartbroken, so you give him a small smile, "I'm j-just giving you a hard t-t-time."

Jimin nods sadly, "I'm so confused. I just- I thought you had forgotten me after you were in the hospital..."

You say nothing so he continues, "No, you did. You did forget about me, I tried talking to you and-"

"I know," You whisper, "I'm s-s-sorry Jimin, but I lied."

That makes him freeze.

"You and M-Mina were the only two I r-r-really remembered."

It's silent for a minute, then he whispers, hurt, "But why?"

You look back at him, "It h-h-hurt too much to talk to y-you. I'm sorry."

Jimin nods sadly, "Don't apologize, I understand. But, how did you remember me?"

You laugh, embarrassed, "I had k-kind of been in l-l-love with you since elementary s-school."

Jimin's eyes bulge out of his head, "What?"

"Yeah, since w-we met. After you had h-h-helped me clean the mess I made." Jimin looks lost for a minute, then his eyes light up with recognition, "Oh! Oh, really?"

You nod, another laugh slipping out.

"So, you didn't lose your memory of me...because you still had your memories from elementary school?"

Another nod.

"But then, how did you remember me rejecting you?" The words taste bitter in his mouth.

You shrug, "I don't know, I j-j-just did. A few th-things came b-back to me after leaving the h-hospital."

"I'm sorry that had to be one of them," Jimin whispers.

"It's o-okay, you had n-no obligation to like me b-back," You take a deep breath, already feeling better after getting that off your chest, "Whatever h-happened to the girl y-y-you had liked? Did you a-ask her out?"

Jimin nods with a sad smile, "Yeah."

"A-And?"

"We dated until college...then I found out she cheated on me and we broke up."

Your heart breaks at that, "J-Jimin, I'm so-sorry."

"Don't be, it was for the best."

You sit in more silence for a bit, but this time it feels more comfortable.

Then Jimin speaks up again, "So what are you up to these days, ____? Any special man in your life?" He wiggles his eyebrows at you jokingly.

You laugh, "I am a k-k-kindergarten t-teacher."

Jimin's eyes light up, "Really? Congratulations, ____. You seriously deserve it."

"Th-Thank you. And w-what about you?"

Jimin sighs and gestures at his outfit, "Clearly I'm not as successful as you," You laugh and shake your head as he continues, "I'm just working this delivery job until I get my foot in the door for some journalist positions."

Your eyes grow wide, "R-Really?"

He nods, "I've always wanted to be a reporter, a journalist, something like that. It's a lot harder than it looks though."

You nod, "W-Well I'm rooting for y-you."

"Thank you," He smiles warmly at you, "You were always the sweetest."

You blush at that and Jimin continues, "You never answered my previous question," He squints at you playfully as he points at you, "Any special guys?"

You're about to shake your head, then Jungkook pops into your brain.

His dark eyes penetrating your thoughts, his rosebud lips sneaking into your mind.

Jimin sees you hesitate and a knowing smile grows on his face, "Ah-ha! There is someone!"

You look at him, blushing profusely, "Th-There isn't-"

"Liar!" Jimin cackles, clapping his hands, "You are so in love!"

His words startle you, "I'm n-not! It isn't l-like that."

Jimin wipes at the gleeful tears in his eyes as he leans closer to you, inspecting your face carefully.

"I know that look, ____. You're smitten."

You splutter, "I-I-I am n-not smitten!"

Jimin smirks at you and you fight the urge to smack him.

Then he glances around your living room, "It's beautiful in here, did you decorate it yourself?"

You nod proudly, glad he's changed the subject.

You two make small talk for a few more minutes, just catching up on life.

Then Jimin looks at his watch, "Shit, I gotta go. Bossman will be livid with me for taking so long," He stands up and you follow him to the door.

"Thanks for having me, ____. It was wonderful to catch up with you."

You smile brightly, "I'm s-s-so glad that we were able to m-meet again."

Jimin gives you one last smile as he walks out the door, but before you can close it, he turns around, "Do you..."

You raise an eyebrow in question.

"Do you think we could meet up again sometime? Grab a coffee or something?"

You nod happily, "I w-w-would love that."

You end up exchanging numbers before he hurries on his way.

Closing the door, a huge smile spreads on your face.

Park Jimin.

Your first love.

Delivering a pizza to your door.

Who would've thought?

After a moment to process, you start to giggle uncontrollably.

What the heck just happened?

_____________

Jungkook is jogging up the stairs leading to your apartment when a pizza delivery guy comes down at the same time.

He smiles at Jungkook and moves past him.

Thinking nothing of it, Jungkook hurries to your door and knocks three times, waiting anxiously.

The door opens rather quickly like you'd been standing there.

"Ji- oh..."

Your eyes are wide as you stare at Jungkook.

He gives you a small smile, "Um, hi."

He sees you swallow thickly as you observe him, it takes you a minute to respond.

"H-Hi."

Jungkook bites his lip, not sure how to go about saying what he wants to say next.

"W-What are y-you doing here?" You beat him to it.

The way you say it makes his stomach turn a little.

When he doesn't respond, you sigh and reach up to rub your tired eyes, "J-Jungkook..."

He wishes he could say something, anything.

But it's like every single word he's ever known is suddenly gone out of his brain and he knows nothing.

You look so sleepy, the events from the past week are probably weighing on you right now.

Jungkook thinks as his gaze drifts over your exhausted face, his heart pulling apart in his chest as Mina's story comes barreling back into his mind.

After another beat of silence, Jungkook finally finds his voice and you decide to be honest with him at the same time.

"____, will you go somewhere with me-"

"J-Jungkook I'm t-tired of th-this-"

You both shut up and look at the other.

Jungkook's heart sinks in his chest at your words.

Your own heart feels like someone is poking at it with a sharp stick.

"What?" Jungkook whispers.

You cover your face with your hands, "I- I j-just..."

"Can I come in? Please?" Jungkook asks hopefully, wanting to correct things before shit hits the fan.

You nod and open the door wider for him to slip inside.

He immediately notices the pizza box on the table and his mind wanders back to the guy passing him earlier. He lets it go as he stands there, waiting for you to shut the door.

You do, then you walk over to the couch and plop down, curling your legs up and tucking them near you as you grab a pillow and hold it tightly to your chest.

Jungkook takes a few very deep and very calming breaths before walking over to the couch to sit down.

He needs to just keep breathing, or else he'll mess shit up again with his stupidity.

You fidget quietly as Jungkook stares at the Barbie movies in the glass cabinet under the TV. He doesn't know why he can't seem to look away from them.

"She just finds comfort in things like coloring, watching movies, eating sweets. Her brain was damaged, badly. But it's gotten so much better since then, she's made so much progress. She might act like a kid sometimes, but she isn't one and doesn’t think she is. ____ was innocent before and she's innocent now-"

Jungkook's breath hitches as he remembers Mina's words.

"Did y-you speak t-to M-Mina?"

Jungkook turns to you when you speak up quietly, noticing the way you won't even look at him. Your eyes are locked on the pillow in front of you as you pick at the loose threads.

"Yeah," He mumbles back.

You finally raise your eyes to his, "I- I think you sh-should leave."

Jungkook's heart stutters painfully.

"____, I need to talk to you."

"A-About what?"

"I-..." What does he say? He needs to get you out of here, he's run out of time, "I know this sounds dumb, but would you go somewhere with me? Just for a little bit."

You just stare at him, your eyes reflecting a pain he's never seen in you before, even after he was horrible to you in the rain, even after his dumb ass forced you to go home and ruined your day.

This pain is a first.

He shifts his body towards you more, "____, what's going on? Are you oka-"

"No."

He freezes, his mind short-circuiting at your bitter response.

"No, I'm n-not. I'm n-n-not okay."

You can see the way his eyes flicker back and forth between yours and it makes your heart race.

You can't handle this.

You don't like pain, you don't like it.

You always run from it.

Maybe you are just a child.

More reason to put an end to this anyway.

The insecurities swarming your head finally come out, in an angry huff of air, startling Jungkook when you stand up abruptly, still gripping the pillow.

"I n-n-need you to leave."

Jungkook stands up too, his tall frame looming over you and making you look down at the ground.

"I can't," He mutters.

Your eyes trail up to his, anger burning in them.

Why is life so unfair?

Why can't someone just like you, for you?

Why does reality always have to come and bite you in the butt?

"Go to M-Mina," You seethe.

Jungkook looks at you like you're crazy, his mind going in circles trying to figure out what the hell you're talking about.

"____, what?"

"You h-h-heard me," You swallow the lump in your throat.

Curse this stupid stutter.

You can't even tell someone something and be taken seriously.

Jungkook shakes his head slowly, his confused gaze locked on your angered one.

"Why would I want to go to her?"

You scoff, making Jungkook take a step back to observe you in disbelief.

What happened to you?

Were you really that mad about him asking you for her number? He didn't need it because he liked that brat, he needed it because he needs to save you.

But you don't know that.

How could he expect you to?

"Just...get o-out," Your voice is thick with tears.

Jungkook shakes his head again and takes a step towards you, his hand stretched out.

But you step back, away from him.

"Stop h-h-hurting me!" You suddenly raise your voice. It isn't anywhere near a yell but it shocks him enough. You never raise your voice...

"I'm sorry-"

You close your eyes and take a long breath as if to calm yourself down.

"I kn-know you like M-Mina. Don't m-make me hurt anymore by h-having to let go while y-y-you're standing right in f-front of me!"

Jungkook steps forward and grabs your hand, but you don't open your eyes.

You dare not look at him.

Not ever again.

Or you'll break.

You love Mina more than anything, you'd do anything for her.

That's why she was always pushing you away from Jungkook.

She likes him.

And of course, he likes her back.

The pain in your heart is causing your breath to shorten.

If you look at him now, you won't have the strength to give him up for her.

"____, I swear I don't like her-"

It isn't true.

"I just needed to ask her something!"

Stop trying to spare me the pain, just leave me alone.

"____, please look at me," Jungkook pleads.

No.

You shake your head, keeping your eyes closed tight.

Jungkook sighs in exasperation, "I had to ask her about your accident!!"

At that, your watery eyes slowly open.

Jungkook breathes a sigh of relief when he sees your beautiful eyes land on him.

Then you take your hand out of his and he feels his next breath stutter.

"What?" You whisper.

The words get caught in his throat for a second before he's able to shove them out, "I had to ask her about Kihyun, and the accident...I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I swear ____, I don't like her like that. Hell, I don't like her at all! Not to mention she hates my guts!"

Your jaw clenches and Jungkook wants to just beg you to listen to him, to please not be mad and just listen to him.

"I w-was in a c-c-car accident..."

Jungkook does a double-take at your words.

"What d-d-d-does that have t-to do with you or Kihyun? How is th-that any of your business?!"

Jungkook just stares at you as your face turns red, "I w-want you to leave me alone p-please. Stop playing w-with my h-heart and running out on m-me."

Jungkook feels like he's about to explode.

With anger, sadness, regret, and this weird protective stuffy feeling he gets when he's around you.

"I'm sorry-"

"And I f-forgave you."

He flinches at that.

"But an empty a-apology means n-nothing, J-Jungkook."

"It-...It isn't empty. ____, I know I'm stupid, I'm a grade A idiot! A fucking moron! But I never meant to hurt you by running out, I just- I panicked..." He's fumbling over his words, not even understanding what he's trying to say at this moment.

"W-Why would you g-go behind my back to t-talk about me?! Why not j-just come to me??"

"I didn't think you-"

"Didn't think I r-remembered it?"

Your voice is bitter, laced with hurt.

Jungkook nods slowly.

You scoff, "Y-You're right, I d-d-don't. I had to rely on M-Mina to tell me that m-my family died in a c-c-car crash and I w-was the only one that survived."

His chest hurts.

"Did y-you want to m-make fun of m-me? Figure out exactly w-why I sp-sp-speak like a fr-freak? Why everyone t-t-treats me like a ch-child?"

Jungkook's brows furrow, "Why on earth would you ever think something like that?"

"B-Because I'm n-not like you, J-Jungkook. You c-could get any g-g-girl that you want, but I w-was stupid enough to th-think it would be-...never m-mind."

Jungkook's brain is racing, he has no idea what you're getting at.

He doesn't understand what the hell girls are thinking or trying to say.

He knows he's an idiot, he doesn't know how to fix that.

But he needs to fix this.

And quickly.

He steps forward to grab your hands again, but this time you don't pull away, "____, I never meant to make you think I was using you to get to Mina if that's how you feel. I wasn't. I needed Mina to tell me because I was worried about you, I swear," His voice is firm.

You look at him, unsure.

Jungkook sighs, "I didn't go to you because I thought that you wouldn't remember, but more so because I didn't want to hurt you further if you did. I didn't want to stir up anything that you'd want to put away. I realize now that that was shitty of me to go behind your back, I should've come to you first, it was your story to tell. I'm sorry."

You blink, taken aback by how honest and sincere he seems right now.

You'd been hurting from all the running away and ignoring you and all that he's been doing recently.

This is the first time it feels like he's actually taking you seriously.

You bring your eyes up to his, "I'm s-s-sorry for lashing o-out. I have f-f-feelings like every-yone else and I w-was hurt."

Jungkook nods, "It's okay, I'm sorry too." His deep brown eyes search yours carefully as you continue, "You c-c-can like Mina, I-I-I underst-stand. She's b-beautiful..."

Jungkook takes you by surprise when he starts to chuckle. You look at him curiously, "W-Why are you l-l-laughing?"

Jungkook gently lets go of your hands, making you miss the warmth of them instantly.

He brings his hands up to run through his hair, "I can't believe you think I'd fall for Mina."

You scowl, "Why w-wouldn't you?"

Jungkook lets out an amused scoff, "She's not my type."

"Oh, y-yeah? What i-is your type then?"

He looks at you and you make eye contact for a second before your gaze darts away. Jungkook keeps his eyes on you for a moment longer.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Jungkook says teasingly, noting that your cheeks turn pink as you shake your head in denial, "I d-d-don't care."

He laughs lightly and you feel your heart lift in your chest.

A minute passes in silence as the two of you try to think of what to say next.

You're a bit embarrassed about your outburst, but you know he understands.

You were valid in your feelings and he seems genuinely sorry for everything.

Jungkook's head is in a completely different place, trying to go about how to ask you to leave Seoul with him.

This is ridiculous, you'll never agree.

You watch as Jungkook's eyes dart around the room as if he's trying to figure something out.

"Y-You okay?" You ask, a bit worried.

Jungkook looks up, his eyes finding yours.

Just do it, Jeon.

Don't be a wuss.

"Will you leave Seoul with me?"

He blurts it out, figuring he'll chicken out if he doesn't.

Your eyes widen and you're shocked into silence for a good minute.

When the initial shock leaves you, you blink a few times.

Jungkook just stands there stupidly.

"Um..."

He winces at your hesitation although it was inevitable.

"...w-why?"

Damn it, he knew you'd ask, you'd be stupid not to.

He needs to make something up, fast.

"This- this seems like the worst timing possible... But I was...invited to uhm, to a thing, a thing in uhm, in Busan. It's like uh, a uh, a school reunion? Thing? Kind of? It's uh...."

Fuck he's a bumbling idiot.

Before he can make a bigger fool out of himself, you burst into laughter.

His chest feels lighter at the sound.

Well, at least he made you laugh...

You wipe at your eyes as you double over in laughter, a good contrast to what you were doing a little while ago, so he'll take it.

Jungkook just stands there, his arms crossed over his broad chest as he watches you make fun of him.

When you finally catch your breath, you look at him to see him scowling darkly.

You feel like it would scare anyone else, but it doesn't scare you.

You poke at his chest, the last of the giggles leaving your lips.

Jungkook stiffens when you touch him, but he will not let you know that your touch affects him.

"Are you finished?" He asks, trying to appear unamused.

You nod, still wiping away the tears of mirth from your eyes.

"So, w-what you're tr-trying to say is, you want me to go to B-Busan with you for a school r-r-reunion?"

He nods in embarrassment at the silly lie.

You laugh again, "Well, w-why didn't y-you just say that? I'd l-love to g-g-go with you!"

Well...that was easy.

Jungkook bites back a smile at the way you shake your head and giggle at him.

"W-When is it?"

"We'd have to leave tonight...like, you should pack now."

"Oh," You look at him in surprise, "Oh, um. O-Okay...how long w-will we be gone?"

The ridiculous contrast to what was happening a few minutes ago and now is going to give you whiplash. A moment ago you were yelling at him to stop hurting you and now you're agreeing to go to Busan with him...

What kind of a day was this?

"Uh, I'm not sure, I was hoping to just spend some time there and go sightseeing, maybe?" Jungkook answers your question awkwardly.

Your warm smile makes him swallow painfully, "I w-would love that. School d-doesn't start for an-another three weeks."

"Perfect," Jungkook nods, "Then it's settled, go pack."

You shriek in excitement and hurry to the back with a little skip to your step, "V-Vacation!"

Jungkook lets out a long breath, his heart skipping a beat at the happy humming floating from your room.

Thank goodness he was successful in that.

But what makes him feel even better, is the fact that your beautiful smile is back.

__________

"Sh-Should I tell Mina?"

Jungkook's grip tenses on the wheel at your words.

He isn't sure why, but he doesn't want Mina to know where the two of you are going.

"Nah, I already told her I was going to ask you to come with me. She knows," Jungkook prays that you'll fall for it, biting his lip harshly.

"Oh," You squeak from the passenger seat.

He swallows his heart that leapt to his throat at the adorable sound.

You look out the side window, watching as the sun starts to set, your head leaning against the glass.

"How l-long will it t-t-take us to get there?" You ask quietly, your eyes still glued to the beautiful colors running across the sky.

Jungkook glances at his phone where the directions are.

"Mm, since there's hardly any traffic, hopefully four hours?"

Your eyes widen a little and you make a small sound of acknowledgment.

"Hm, ok."

Jungkook drags his eyes back to the road, telling himself that he's not allowed to look at you the whole way lest he get distracted and crash the car like a fool.

Jungkook has some soft music playing in the background, making you smile softly to yourself. You didn't think him the type of person to listen to classical instrumental music, but it's nice and relaxing, especially for how tired you are.

An hour into the drive, you feel your eyes getting extremely heavy. You keep blinking them rapidly to keep yourself awake, but every time you blink it gets harder and harder to open them again.

Jungkook, as well as he had done the first hour, fails his own rule as he glances at you.

He had noticed the way you were shifting and jerking around for the past few minutes.

"Hey, you okay?" Jungkook asks gently before returning his gaze to the road.

You nod sleepily, a tiny yawn slipping out of you.

"J-Just a little s-sleepy is all."

A soft smile appears on Jungkook's face and you feel your chest warm at the sight. You can't stop staring at his side profile, the line of his jaw, and his adorably big nose, even his lashes are long and beautiful.

"You can take a nap you know-"

"Nooo, no no," You wave a hand in the air dismissively, "I'm n-not tired at all!"

Jungkook stifles a laugh at you contradicting yourself within thirty seconds.

He nods, "Okay, then you don't have to take a nap."

You smile drowsily, appearing almost drunk in a way.

Jungkook glances at you again.

Drunk from exhaustion, you most certainly are.

What a rollercoaster of a day.

He sighs, a gentle sound as he turns back to keep his eyes forward, "You look really sleepy."

"Y-You look really p-pretty..."

Jungkook, startled at your words, looks at you with wide eyes, "Huh?"

No one has ever called him pretty before...

You have an elbow against the console, your chin in your hand as you gaze up at him dreamily.

"I'm s-s-sorry I said all th-that mean st-stuff back at my apartment," You whisper, lips turning down into a pout.

Jungkook fidgets, "It's fine, ____. I deserved to get snapped at."

You shake your head, "Noooo," You say cutely, smacking your lips, "Nooo, you d-deserve th-the whooooooole world!" You gesture out, almost smacking him in the face.

Jungkook chuckles.

You're just tired yet you act like you've been drinking nonstop.

"You, J-Jungkook, you d-deserve to a...a? A h-hug."

He feels a pinching in his chest at your words.

"Thanks, ____."

You nod, your head lolling to the side as you start to drift off to sleep again, then you jerk suddenly as you remember something.

"M-My first love!"

Jungkook looks at you, bewildered.

"He-...b-brought it to me..."

Jungkook arches an eyebrow at you, "Who brought what to you, ____?"

"An angel brought m-me food t-today!"

Jungkook nods along with your nonsensical rambling, "That's cool," He muses as he passes a car on the highway.

"Yeahh..."

After that, you fall silent.

He glances over at you after you haven't spoken for a few minutes, to see your head resting against the seat, your mouth open slightly as you sleep soundly.

He fights the smile that's creeping its way onto his face, trying as hard as he can to pay attention to the road.

Jungkook reaches up a hand and slaps it across his face, harder than he had meant to.

He winces in pain, but at least it got him to think straight.

Jungkook keeps his eyes on the road (mostly) the rest of the way.

It's kind of lonely with you sleeping beside him, but he doesn't really mind.

It's around one in the morning when Jungkook gently shakes your shoulder.

You stir, your eyes opening into little slits as you look around in confusion.

"W-Where am I?" You ask, mumbling almost incoherently.

"We're here, ____. We're in Busan," Jungkook says softly, his hand still on your shoulder.

Once you're able to open your eyes all the way, you see the inside of Jungkook's car, then you turn your head to the right to see him standing outside your door, holding it open as he smiles at you.

"Oh," You say in surprise, "I f-forgot we were on v-vacation."

Jungkook chuckles at that, "Come on, ____. Let's get you to bed."

He reaches around you to unbuckle your seat belt, then you watch quietly as he grabs your purse and slings it over his shoulder.

Next, he grabs your hand and helps you out of the car.

You take in the sight of a small motel, very simple, very dark, and very very cute.

Jungkook watches your eyes light up at the place you'll be staying tonight.

"It's s-so cute," You whisper sleepily.

Jungkook shrugs, "I've never considered a motel to be cute before, but it's decent."

You keep a hold of his hand as you climb out of the car, then you shyly let go and follow him to the trunk where he pulls out both of your suitcases.

"I can c-carry something," You offer as you see him start moving with both of the cases to the front of the motel.

Jungkook shakes his head, his floofy brown hair flopping about, "I'm all good."

You bite back a laugh at the sight of him wheeling two suitcases with a purse slung over his arm, then you hurry to catch up to him.

Inside, there's a very small old man at the front desk, reading a newspaper.

He looks up when you and Jungkook walk in.

A friendly smile graces his features as he sets the paper down, "Hello there, how can I help you?"

"Hi," Jungkook clears his throat, "I called about two rooms earlier today...well, I guess it was technically yesterday..."

The man nods and grabs this little notebook, "Perfect! Name?"

"Uhm...Jungkook, Jeon Jungkook,” He says lowly.

Ohhhh, Jeon?

Even his last name suits him.

You see him fidgeting a little as the older man flips through the notebook, "Ah yes! Right here."

Then he turns to grab a key out of a little cabinet, "Your rooms will be one twenty-three and one twenty-two-"

He pauses, his hand freezing over an empty cubby in the cabinet.

"Uhm...one moment."

He shuffles behind a little curtain leading to a different room.

Jungkook looks back at you with a puzzled expression and you shrug, you don't have any idea what's going on either.

A minute later the man comes out with a regretful look on his face.

"I'm so sorry, Mr. Jeon. It would appear as though someone accidentally gave your rooms away without looking at the reservations," The man looks terribly guilty.

Jungkook bites his lip, "Uhm, alright, well can I get two other rooms then?"

The man nods quickly and ruffles through his notebook, then he looks at Jungkook again.

"We only have one room available. I sincerely apologize, this was my mistake-"

"Don't worry about it," Jungkook gives him a tight-lipped smile, "We'll take it. Thank you."

After getting your key, you and Jungkook walk out to find your room, not speaking until you get there.

Once Jungkook unlocks the door and opens it for you, he gives you an embarrassed smile, "Sorry, ____. I would take us somewhere else but it's late and-...I'll sleep on the floor."

You turn to him, "D-Don't be silly. We'll both sl-sleep on a bed."

He looks at you, bewildered, then his gaze follows your outstretched arm as you point at the bed.

Or...

The beds.

AH! A MIRACLE!

Jungkook sighs in relief, letting the door close behind him as he sets your suitcases to the side.

"Well this isn't so bad," He says as he looks around the room, taking in the twin beds with satisfaction.

Then he looks at you to see you gazing around in wonder, gently touching the bed and making your way over to the bathroom to peek your head inside.

When you turn back to him, your eyes are lit up like stars in the night sky.

"It's b-beautiful!"

Jungkook does one more look over.

There are twin beds with white covers and pillows, a nightstand between them and TV on a desk in front along with a coffee machine and glass mugs.

Meh, it's not a crappy place, he's been in far worse, but he's also been in far better.

Then something clicks and he looks at you again, "Wait, have you never been to a hotel- or- a motel before?"

You shake your head, your innocent eyes never leaving his.

Jungkook lets out a short laugh of disbelief, "Huh."

You walk over to your suitcase and grab it, pulling it with you to the bathroom, "I'm g-going to change."

"Uh-huh," Jungkook says, still trying to process the fact that you've never stayed in a place like this before.

When he hears the bathroom door close, he walks over to his suitcase and opens it up, grabbing out a t-shirt and some pajama shorts.

He makes quick work of changing, then he settles on the left bed, a groan leaving his lips as he lays back.

A moment later, the door to the bathroom opens and Jungkook sees you walk out shyly, a simple lilac nightgown draping around your frame.

He looks away quickly, fixing his gaze on the black screen of the television positioned in front of the twin beds.

You hurry over and climb into the bed on the right, slipping underneath the covers and sighing happily.

"Th-These beds are s-so comfy!"

Jungkook hums in response, his eyes still glued to the TV even though it's off.

You pull the covers up to your chin and close your eyes, letting out a tiny yawn.

At the sound, Jungkook's resolution crumbles and he glances over at you.

The way your eyelids flutter and your lips part slightly as you breathe makes his heart beat rapidly.

Suddenly, your eyes pop open and you're staring right back at him.

He was so startled when it happened that he didn't even look away, instead, his gaze stays locked on yours, eyes wide.

It feels like an eternity passes as the two of you just stare at each other, but it's really only a few seconds.

Long enough for Jungkook's heart to be in his throat and your tummy to start tickling.

Then you whisper, "I w-was just going to a-ask you to turn out the l-light."

A choked breath escapes Jungkook as he snaps his gaze away from yours.

"Oh, yeah sure."

Without looking at you, he reaches over to the table between your beds and flips the light off.

It's silent for a little bit, then Jungkook hears you whisper in the darkness, "I'm sorry a-about earlier."

"You already apologized, and I told you there was no need to."

You sigh and shift onto your back, "When is th-the school reunion?"

Jungkook internally groans, "It's in a few days."

"W-Why did we have t-to leave so quickly?"

Jungkook moves to his right side, so he's facing you in the darkness, but he can't make you out.

"I wanted to be sure we got a place to stay before it all filled up."

"Ah, okay."

Fuck, he hates lying to you so easily.

The fact that you have full trust in him is making him sick to his stomach.

But at least he got you here.

He's gotten you out of Seoul.

That buys him a bit more time to figure out who the hell placed the hit on you.

Then he'll take matters into his own hands.

After a few minutes, Jungkook is sure you've fallen asleep again, so it takes him by surprise when you speak up.

"What is y-your favorite flower?"

"Uhm, I'm not sure...I don't know that many flowers," Jungkook replies, his eyes still closed.

You giggle, "My f-favorite is the a-almond flower."

Jungkook nods thoughtfully, then he realizes that you can't see him so he clears his throat, "Ah, what does that one look like?"

"It's little and w-white with a h-hint of pink in the middle. V-Very cute."

Jungkook smiles, "Sounds very fitting for you."

Your cheeks heat up as you cuddle more into the covers, "Do y-you want to know th-the meaning of it?" You whisper.

He finally opens his eyes, but all he can see is darkness, "Sure."

He suddenly remembers your letter to him after you visited the field of dandelions.

What did you say the dandelion represented again? Oh yeah, hope and happiness...or something like that...

"It m-means h-hope and renewal."

Jungkook hears you shifting a little to get comfortable.

"That's nice," He says gently, "I guess the little simple ones tend to represent hope, huh?"

You positively beam, realizing that he must have remembered your letter to him about the dandelion.

"I g-guess so."

Jungkook turns onto his back, staring up at the ceiling.

Before he can back out, he asks, "What does the lotus flower represent?"

"Is th-that your f-favorite?"

Jungkook blinks a few times before answering you, "It was my mother's."

You sit up and look over at him curiously, wondering if something had happened to her with the way his voice sounded and the fact that he used past tense.

"Oh...w-well I happen t-to know that one," You lay back down, "It m-means enlightenment and r-rebirth."

Huh.

How ironic.

"Ah," Is all he says.

You lay there in silence for a little bit, then you remember something that you had wanted to tell him.

"Oh y-yeah, I had the w-weirdest dream the other day."

"Mm? What was it?"

"I w-was laying in a f-field of flowers. Purple f-flowers-"

Jungkook's brain suddenly snaps to attention at your words, "What did they look like?" He asks abruptly, interrupting you.

"Uh, they w-were some of m-my favorite flowers, they're c-called Agapanthus."

"Agapi- what?" Jungkook asks, face scrunched in confusion.

You laugh and blindly reach for your phone on the nightstand.

Jungkook looks over to see a blue light illuminating your face as you look at your phone and his breath gets caught in his throat.

Fuck.

Don't be stupid, Jungkook.

He looks away quickly.

"H-Here," You stand up and waddle over to his bed, plopping yourself down on the side of it and jostling him a bit. Jungkook swallows thickly at the close proximity all of the sudden.

You hold your phone close to his face, watching as he squints at the picture of the flower you were talking about.

"A-Agapanthus," You state again, smiling.

But Jungkook barely hears you, he's frozen, staring at the picture in your hand.

That's the flower that was in his dream the other day.

The field was full of them.

"Anyw-way, I w-was lying there. It w-was so vivid. Th-Then I realized I was h-holding someone's hand-"

Jungkook can't tear his eyes away from your phone, his heartbeat increasing the more of your story you tell.

"I c-could tell it w-was a guy's hand, b-but I couldn't turn my head to see who it was."

His eyes finally drift from your phone up to your face where you're sporting a faint pout.

He doesn't know what possesses him to ask, all he registers are the shaky words suddenly coming from his mouth, "What's the meaning of this flower?"

Your gaze shifts to his and you smile softly, "L-Love."

__________________________________

a/n: jk is a damned fool, who’s with me.

Tag list; @hopekookies @moonchild1 @barbellastyles98 @teresaisla @ggukkieland @mwitsmejk @scuzmunkie @jaebeomsblackgf @sugaslittlekookies @moon-asia @bangtannie7 @yoonchrisgull @njkbangtan @higashikatasgf @jksbbyfacebunny @sweetonkookieandtae @voidswan-recs @sadxaries @bts-junseagull @jinfused @taehyungiev13 @gaeguuliii @kimnamjoonluvbot @jungkooook @mutterseelenalleinn @surilirani @patpus @yukiehyukie @crypticsabbat @ohyeahjk @steffiiirose @the-falling-star @telepathytae @erenkook

274 notes · View notes

running-on-fanfiction · 2 years

Text

Luke Skins - Vanilla Rose

Can i pls request a Luke from skins imagine where you're very quiet and kind and he takes advantage of that (gets you to take care of him and clean him up etc) but then you find out about frankie and maybe luke tries to hurt you so you kick him out and he realises what's up thanks so much :)

A/N: Luke is a violent, I mean that's his whole character. So there will be a warning on most of his.

*Disclaimer* DV

Song while writing: Wurst Vacation By: Ice Nine Kills

Luke had a way with people. Sometimes it got him in trouble and other times it got him something he had always wanted. You were part of the something he wanted.

You had met Luke a year ago, at a pub. He was there with his questionable mates and you were there with a group of school mates for a project. As soon as Luke walked in his eyes were on you every moment and every turn he'd made. It of course didn't take long for him to come over and chat you up either. By the end of the night you were doing things the normal Y/N would have never done in her 22 years of life. You were a good girl when you met and you were still one but not as good as you once were.

You fought with random blokes on the street, had crazy sex with Luke in some crazy places and you've had some questionable fights with Luke. You've seen Luke fight many times, girls or boys, he was no stranger to hitting. Lucky for you he had yet to lay any hands on you. So that's why this night was had for you.

The night started with you sitting on the couch reading a book. Luke had some stuff he had to do with the boys that not. You knew better then to ask to go or ask what they were doing. The last time you did Luke stopped talking to you for a whole month.

You leaned over to grab the cup of lukewarm tea, bring it up to your lips to take a sip. Peppermint was just gross when it was cold. You sighed, as you placed your book on the couch, so that your place was saved, before walking into the kitchen with the mug. You had just placed the kettle on when your front door opened and a cut up Luke hobbled in.

"Jesus Luke, what the fuck happened" You asked running towards him. Luke let out a dry laugh, as he finally sat down on the couch. Your book had fallen off as he flopped down with a heavy huff. Picking the book up and placing it on the table, you leaned down to look at Luke's face.

He let out a hiss as you grabbed his hands to look at the cuts. He was in a fight with someone who had just as much to lose as him. You were leaning in a little closer to see where the blood was coming from on his arm, when you smelt it.

Rose with a hint of vanilla.

You didn't wear Rose or Vanilla. You wear Cinnamon and Lavender.

The closer you looked the more you could see the lipstick stains on his collar. The wrinkled shirt that wasn't from fighting. As well as the belt around his pants on upside down.

"Fuck you." You spat as you shoved his arm away from you. You stood and began to walk back to the kitchen, when you felt his hand grip your arm. He pushed you against the wall.

"Excuse me." He grinned. You knew that grin all to well. It was his way of letting you know he was pissed at something someone just did or said. He know had you pinned to the wall and was so close to you, that you now had drops of his blood on your clothes.

"Oh what you can fuck her, but you can't have her clean you up. " You gritted your teeth feeling the urge to punch him in the balls.

Luke giggled like it was the most funniest thing ever. His eye landed on your lips, and before you had time to say anything they were glued to your lips.

You gagged as you could still taste her on him. You pushed him as well as you could and he hit the wall with his fist.

"Fuck Y/N." His smile faded, his eyes turned dark. He tried to kiss you again, but this time you kneed him in the jewels. He dropped your wrist, and you moved to grab the hardest thing you could get, which was a cutting board.

"You bitch." He hissed as he came towards you. He held a fist up, but before he could land it on your face, you had opened the door and screamed.

"GET THE FUCK OUT! NOW!" You knew it was loud enough for people to hear, because across the street, people were opening their front doors to see what was going on.

Luke gave you a this isn't over look, before walking past you and out the door. He turned to look at you again.

"Tell Frankie, I said hi." You said, before closing the door on him. You swear you saw a small smile on his face.

-Julianne

#luke skins #luke skins imagine #joe cole imagine #joe cole imagines #skins uk #skins uk imagines

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novaiya · 3 years

Text

Love below 0°C - Arthur x Reader

Summary: You’ve just escaped from Blackwater, barely ducking from bullets that were shot your way. Your trusted horse, however, wasn’t so lucky. Stuck in Colter with no stables to buy a horse from, Arthur decides to go out and get you one, but not just any one, a White Arabian. Is the horse the only thing he's bringing back?

Words: 2.8k

Tags: Established Relationship, FLUFF,

A/N: I think the last line in this piece is the best line I’ve ever wrote simply because oh the image it evokes :(

Based on this request: Could you please do a fic set during the prologue of rdr2 in Colter, that Arthur tries to tame the white Arabian for the reader because their horse died instead of Boedecia, it takes hours to do it and when he brings it back to camp he starts sneezing and catches a cold so the reader thanks him by taking care of him :D

If you prefer to read on AO3, click here.

The wind was brutal, hitting your body with such force that you were wondering how the horses were able to keep going. If it wasn’t for you holding onto Arthur, you were sure that the wind would’ve taken you away.

Having escaped from Blackwater, the entire gang have found themselves up in the mountains, caught in a snowstorm. Although the weather was cruel and you could already feel your limbs go numb, it beat being captured by the Pinkertons and the lawmen that would surely kill you more painful than the weather would.

As everybody rode on, thinking about the next move or the weather, you were thinking about your horse. From the East to the West and back to the East, he was with you through it all. A gift from Arthur, he was the first, and only, horse you’ve had since joining the Van Der Linde gang. He was loyal to you from the start, patient as you learned how to properly ride and take care of him, and he deserved more than to be killed by a stray bullet from a Blackwater lawman. Tears pricked your eyes as you remembered the image of him laying on the ground, taking his last breath right before Arthur ran up and scooped you away, putting you on his horse and riding away from the damned town.

Your head was laying on Arthur’s back as he rode through the snow, following the light of Dutch’s lantern. You were starting to doze off, Arthur’s back, warm and soft, being as good as any pillow. The voices of Dutch and the rest of the gang were fading into the foreground as you fell asleep, the sound of wind howling accompanying you into the dream world.

When you woke up the next morning, you found yourself in a bed, with a blanket over you and Arthur snuggled behind you. Despite the snow outside making the windows of the cabin tremble, you were as warm and cozy as you could be. You turned around in Arthur’s hold, facing him; he was so cute when he slept, with his mouth slightly open. His nose and cheeks were a bit red, indicating that he was probably out in the cold last night. You had to make sure to keep him warm and safe while you were in this weather, you thought, otherwise he was bound to catch a cold. You knew how reckless he could get, forgetting to take care of himself and putting others first. It was one of the best and at the same time worst traits of his.

As if he felt you watching him, he gradually opened his eyes.

“Mornin’,” he said.

“Morning,” you returned. “Were you out last night?” you said, running a hand through his hair and down to his reddened cheek.

“I was. Me, Micah and Dutch went to check out a homestead Micah found. The O'Driscolls got there first. Found a woman there, brought her back.”

“What about the homestead? Can we go back and stay there?”

“Unfortunately, Micah got to it first, burned the whole thing to the ground.”

“Jesus…” you drew, shaking your head.

The two of you were silent for a moment before Arthur spoke again.

“How are you feeling?” he said, eyeing you with a bit of worry. The two of you didn’t have time to discuss the situation till now.

“I’m okay,” you said, shuffling a bit and rising up so you could sit against the headboard. “Just sad about Happy. He didn’t deserve to go out like that.”

“I’m sorry,” Arthur said, following you and sitting against the headboard as well. He smiled as he remembered the day when he gifted you your horse. Since joining the gang, you would either ride one of the unused horses kept by the hitching post, or ride on the back of Boadicea with Arthur. Despite never being without a ride, you felt that you were ready to have one you could properly call your own, and shared that with Arthur. Being the gentleman he was, Arthur quickly took you to the nearest stable and bought you your new horse (an act for which he got a kiss and which started your relationship) “I remember when the two of you first met, you didn’t even have to break him in. He practically wanted you to mount him,” he said with a laugh.

You smiled and chuckled a bit, remembering how quickly you formed a bond with your horse. That smile quickly faded as you realized you were never going to see Happy again. You shook your head, trying to push away the thoughts.

The two of you got ready before going out of your room and into a dining room-kitchen area of the little cabin you stayed in. Molly was standing by the counter, looking out of the window and sipping on a coffee. Hosea was sitting in a chair by the fireplace, warming up his hands. You went to the counter to make a cup of coffee for yourself and Arthur.

“I know it might be too soon,” Arthur said, coming up to you and taking the coffee you offered. “But we need to get you a new horse.”

His words stung you a bit; you felt bad for replacing Happy so soon, but you knew that you had to. If you had no horse, you couldn’t be a productive member of the gang.

“I know,” you said, looking down into your cup of coffee. “But how are we supposed to do that? We can’t just go out to buy one now, it might be too dangerous.”

“I’ve heard stories of an Arabian horse roaming in the mountains not far from here.” Hosea’s voice made both of you look at him.

Arthur turned around to face him. “Do you know where exactly?”

“Well, no one is sure for certain, and they are just that, stories, but people said they’ve seen it around Lake Isabella.”

__________________________

“Just promise me you’ll be careful,” you said, standing next to Arthur’s horse as he mounted it, getting ready to make the trip to Lake Isabella.

“You know me darlin’,” Arthur said with a smile. “I’m always careful.”

You chuckled, slapping his leg playfully.

He bent down slightly, and you stood on your tiptoes, meeting him halfway and kissing him. His lips were cold, and so were yours, but neither of you minded. When you broke apart, he gave you a smile before spurring Boadicea and disappearing into the snowy plain.

You stood in the snow for a few more minutes, looking out into the distance where Arthur rode away to. You hoped he would be careful and take care of himself like he promised. He had a tendency of neglecting himself, being careless and letting himself get hurt or sick. On more than one occasion you had to make sure he wore warm clothes when you were in colder climates, or wore his hat when the sun was especially brutal. Despite being a one of the leaders of the Van Der Linde gang, stepping in for Dutch or Hosea when he had to, he could be so silly when it came to trivial things. You chuckled to yourself. Good thing he had you, you thought, a thought that Arthur often had himself.

__________________________

The snowstorm was getting more brutal the further he went into the mountains. At some points, he couldn’t even see in front of him, everything hidden by the white of the snow. From time to time, the storm would get so brutal, Boedecia could barely move through it. Finally, after a few hours he could see the frozen Lake Isabella. Everything was covered in white; the trees, the rocks, the lake itself. All the animals that were able to withstand the harsh weather and roamed around too wore coats of white, blending in with the surroundings. In this scenery, Arthur stood out like a sore thumb with his dark blue coat and his black hat.

He hitched Boedecia to one of the trees that lined the shore of the lake before venturing out, trying to get a feel for the surrounding area.

He should get a fire started, he thought, warm himself up before getting to work. That’s what you would’ve done, at least, if you were here. He promised you that he would take care of himself. He felt bad for not doing that, but he hoped he would be in and out within an hour, so forth he went.

It was hours before he finally found her, having missed her white coat in the equally white snow a countless times. Finding her, however, wasn’t even the hardest part, breaking her in, that was. She bucked him off for what he felt like a dozen times. He could barely feel his face in the end, having been thrown off face first in the snow far too many times. Finally, as if the horse was just as tired of bucking off Arthur as Arthur was tired of being bucked off, she gave in, relaxing under him.

Despite being cold, tired and hungry, he forwent setting up camp to rest, already planning the route back to Colter. Being the completionism that he was, he didn’t feel that his mission was over until you had the horse’s reins in your hand.

“Let’s get you to your new owner,” he said, patting the mare’s platinum mane.

He whistled for Boedecia, and when she came, the three of them started their journey back to Colter. The snow storm still blew, but it was not as rough as it was before, and Arthur could see the path in front of him. He noticed how serene and quiet the area was, and if it wasn’t for his occasional sneezes cutting through the silence, there would be nothing heard. When his nose started to run, he cursed himself, using the cuff of his coat to wipe at it.

__________________________

You were standing by the window, sipping on your coffee and looking outside when you saw Arthur make his way up the path on a horse that was as white as a fresh winter snow. “Arthur!” you exclaimed and ran outside.

“Got a present for ya,” he said as he dismounted the horse.

As you looked over your new ride, taking notice of her beautiful, platinum hair and her equally platinum body, you couldn’t help but be distracted by the sneezes and sniffles that came from Arthur. Oh, Arthur! Of course he didn’t listen to you, you thought, probably didn’t set up a fire and most likely spent too much time in the snow. His selfless act, as much as it meant to you, came at a cost that you would now have to help him pay.

“Oh, Arthur,” you said after he sneezed again.

“I’m alright,” he said like he always did, waving away with his hand.

“C’mon,” you said, taking Arthur’s hand in yours and leading him into the house and your room. “Let’s get you warm.”

“Darlin’, I told you, I’m all right.”

He would not have been Arthur Morgan if he didn’t try to reject your help at least once. He hated being a burden to you or to anyone, especially when he was at fault. You, however, after being in a relationship with him for the past few years, learned to not pay attention to his rejections, simply continuing on with what you were doing. With your help, after a few minutes, he was down to his union suit, his clothes, heavy and wet, laying in the corner of the room to be hanged up to dry later. You fished out a fresh set of clothes from your unpacked bags, a pair of pants, a shirt and a warm jacket made of sheepskin, and gave it to him before leaving the room to get a hot cup of coffee and a meal for Arthur.

The room was quiet while you were outside, and Arthur had a moment to let his thoughts travel freely in his mind. He looked at his arms and his legs, clothed in fresh, dry clothes. He looked at the door where on the other side you, his love, were preparing food for him. The warmth that the clothes provided could not rival the warmth he felt in his heart through all your acts of love. He never imagined that someone could love him as much as you did. Not only that, he didn’t think he deserved it, after everything he has done in his life. The words were no match for what he felt for you as you opened the door, balancing a cup of coffee and a bowl of stew as you held the doorknob, your cheeks red from the cold, your eyes full of love as you looked at him.

__________________________

“You silly, silly man,” you said as you sat on a chair next to the bed, looking over Arthur. It has been a few days since Arthur brought back the white Arabian and with her, the cold he caught. He was sneezing, coughing, blowing his nose, the whole nine yards, yet despite all that, he still wanted to get back on his horse and to work. You had to all but tie him to the bed to keep him from going out.

“I need to go out with Dutch,” he would say between sneezes, trying to get up and go.

“They'll have to manage without you,” you would return, pushing him back on the bed and covering him with blankets. “I’m not gonna let you get any more sicker.”

The next few days were mostly spent in the confines of the four walls of your room, with you taking care of Arthur. Surprising yourself, he didn’t fight too much, giving in almost right away and letting you nurse him to health. He could get used to it, he thought, as you kept taking care of him, tucking him under blankets, bringing hot bowls of stew. On a couple of occasions, he caught himself imagining that he wasn’t in some broken down cabin in Colter, hiding from Pinkertons and lawmen, but in his own house, on his own land. The image warmed him up more than any bowl of stew or cup of coffee could.

As you were laying in the bed with Arthur, you could hear the snow storm playing outside, threatening to break the windows and invade the room. Although the walls were cold, with Arthur’s body and a blanket over the two of you, you were warm. By now, Arthur has almost completely recovered, the only trace of the sickness being a sneeze here and there, but it too was almost completely gone.

“You know,” Arthur started, making you look up at him from where your head was on his chest. “It’s in moments like these, when I can see us bein’ somewhere else. Just the two of us.”

He imagined the two of you on your own ranch or a farm. No bounties to hunt, no debts to collect. He could see himself as a rancher, not carrying his gun belt every waking hour, a dog by his side. He imagined you, in a light, flow-y dress, taking care of the house, bringing love and light to it just as you did to every tent the two of you have shared. Maybe the cold has made his mind delirious, but he could even see the two of you grow old together, sitting on a rocking chair on the porch of your house, your hair gray, your face littered with wrinkles, each one telling a story.

“Me too,” you said, imagining a similar scenery in your mind. The mess that had just gone down in Blackwater had shaken your trust in Dutch just as it had for Arthur. Something has changed, and despite continuing following Dutch, the two of you realized you could only rely on one another. It’s a realization, so crucial, which would come to play strongly in the next few months, a lifeline that would lead you to your happy ever after in the end, with you, in a flow-y dress on the porch of your ranch, watching as Arthur tended to the herd, no gun on his hip, only sweat on his forehead from an honest day of work.

#arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan x y/n #arthur morgan #arthur morgan imagine #arthur morgan headcanon #rdr2 #red dead redemption #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 x reader #arthur morgan fanfics #arthur morgan fanfiction #rdr2 fanfiction #rdr2 fanfics #red dead redemption 2 fanfiction #rdr2 imagines #rdr2 headcanons

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aliteama · 3 years

Text

JJK characters describing what love feels like to them

Itadori Yuji- “It’s amazing! It’s this bubbly feeling and it’s like my stomachs doing whirls and my hearts constantly trying to jump out of my chest to try and touch them..” the grin on his face fades as he reflects on his words, “but it’s also like… getting stung by a bee.. you wonder why it hurts you so much yet all you can do is pull out the stinger and wait for the skin to heal” he stares down at his palm as his fingers fold into a fist “The pain eventually fades but you can’t help but be afraid of getting stung again even if you try your hardest not to provoke it-” he unfolds his fist and holds up his hand to you “-I’ve learned to not be afraid anymore though because there’s always someone there to help me heal.”

Fushiguro Megumi- Seconds of silence pass as he rubs his knuckles with a frown on his face, “It’s an obligation, everyone’s expected to love someone and it honestly feels like a weight on your shoulders” he sighs heavily before bringing the pads of his fingers to his cheek to pull at the skin, “It’s one of those dreams that you can’t differentiate from a nightmare. I’ve definitely taken it for granted” his eyes glaze over when he turns to you “I’d like to see love differently though, I hear it’s a warm feeling.”

Kugisaki Nobara- “If you think I’m going to say sunshine and rainbows, you’re wrong. Love’s kinda painful” a bitter laugh spills from her lips as she shakes her head “But it wouldn’t be fair for me to say it’s entirely bad; have you ever been running and at first you feel really good but then the fatigue starts to hit? And even though your legs hurt and your lungs burn you can’t stop moving because it all just feels so human. That feeling when your heart picks up and you keep pushing towards the goal, that’s the most wonderful part” raising a hand she flicks away a loose strand of hair and offers you a toothy grin, “Well at least that’s just how I feel about it.”

Zenin Maki- “Love feels like.. It feels like leaning against a wall that could crack at any moment, the bricks hurt your back and sometimes your feet slip out from under you but you never lose your footing because the wall keeps you stable” she tips her chin back with a thoughtful hum before meeting your eyes, “I’m not one to lean onto walls for support but I think everyone needs a break once in a while, it’s a nice feeling- having something to keep you upright.”

Inumaki Toge- He spins a pen between his fingers before scribbling inky words on paper, “Tuna” he hands the sheet to you, some sentences are crossed out and some have been switched around but the writing is readable. ‘It’s dreadful, did I use that word right having someone know your darkest deepest secrets, It’s scary because you never know if they’ll think less of you the more you unravel, all you can do is cross your fingers and hope they’ll stay.’ He taps at the paper and guides your eyes farther down the page, ‘But when you finally find someone who doesn’t think any less of you it’s an amazing indescribable feeling.’

Okkotsu Yuuta- The question flies over his head as he laughs loudly, cheeks flushed as he jabs at you with the back of his sheathed sword. “Huh? Oh, Love for me is hard to describe since it’s such a broad term.. but if I had to say..” he chuckles at you once more when you finally rip the weapon out of his hand “..it’s perfect. Sure I’ve been hurt and maybe I’m not the most suitable to fall in love since I fall so wholeheartedly but I adore this feeling” brushing his thumb over the swirled button of his jacket he smiles wistfully “Love is definitely a curse but I believe there’s always good in evil. It makes me feel needed and cared for, it gives me a purpose. I’ve found myself through different forms of love and I’ve cherished every relationship. It’s a feeling I wouldn’t trade for the world.”

#Ali blabbers #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #itadori yuji x reader #fushiguro megumi x reader #nobara kugisaki x reader #maki zenin x reader #inumaki x reader #inumaki to/ge #okkotsu yuuta x reader #okkotsu yuta x reader

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frogtanii · 4 years

Text

embarrassed ft. matsukawa issei

wc. 2.7k (???)

warnings. SMUT, not proofread lol, mutual pining (??), friends to lovers (???), cunnilingus lmao, no dom/sub dynamics, well actually dom&sub issei if you squint rlly hard hehe, kinda cute, embarrassed issei <3, also one (1) WAP reference

an. it’s 2:30 am and i have no idea why i wrote this and who for???? i got the idea from a 🦋😳🙈✨ audio and was immediately inspired idk, sorry if it’s bad i lichrally have no idea since i didn’t read it after it was done :p

( ˘ ³˘)♥︎

it wasn’t like matsukawa issei to be embarrassed.

he was handsome, intelligent, and funny, not to mention he never left women wanting after a night with him.

issei was the entire package and he knew it.

beyond superficiality though, he was happy with his life. he had a great group of friends, a nice apartment all to himself and a completely normal job.

yes, being a funeral home employee wasn’t the most glamorous career a person could have but he was happy. besides, it never deterred him from getting a warm body to sleep with which was a win in his book.

all in all? his life was great!

so why did he have to go and screw it all up?

issei blames makki and the dumb flyer for the reason his life went to shit. (maybe he’s being a little dramatic, but let him have his oikawa moment.)

he was minding his own business when his best friend (recently turned enemy) burst through his apartment door with a piece of paper in his hand and a fire in his eyes.

“dude, look at this!” issei rolled his eyes, putting down his casket catalogue and turning to meet takahiro’s gaze.

“why hello to you too. remind me why i gave you a key again?”

“because you love me and because i bring shit like this to you. look!” with another long and suspiciously tooru-like sigh, issei took the crumpled paper from makki and immediately stopped in his tracks.

“makki... what the fuck is this?”

written in large pink letters and a flowery, borderline illegible font was the name, coffee and cunnilingus. upon further inspection and careful reading, it revealed itself to be a little cafe opening up about 10 minutes from issei’s apartment complex who were looking to hire “young, attractive men who are proficient at eating pussy.”

issei could feel his eyes narrow and his mouth drop open in shock as he repeated his question. “the fuck is this?”

makki shook his head excitedly, tapping to another portion of the flyer that matsukawa had not yet read. “no, no dude, just look at how much they’re paying per hour.” issei begrudgingly obliged but the minute his eyes touched the (Massive™) number, he felt a little faint.

it was a lot of money. more than the funeral home was paying, that’s for sure. with that kind of money he could move out of this suddenly dingy seeming apartment and into a nice flat in the city were he’d always wanted to live. maybe he could buy himself a nice watch or even a high-end suit to replace the one from his highschool graduation (aka the only suit he owns). with that kind of money, he could erase his student debt 3 years ahead of schedule and get his mom into a nicer place.

it was these thoughts that clouded issei’s head as he found himself standing in front of a cute looking building, matching the address on the flyer. i’ll only be working part time, he thought as he pushed the door open to reveal an equally impressing interior with curtained booths and a wide variety of coffee on the menu. i’m only doing it for extra money, he thought as he shook the owner’s hand after he finished his successful interview. no one can ever know, he thought as he dressed himself in the uniform on his first day.

thus began issei’s super secret side hustle where he ate women out for cash.

sounds worse when you say it outright but it was just working. he was good at it, the women liked him, and he was making BANK. still, there were challenges. some women refused to bathe before coming and he would have to send them to the restroom to freshen up which absolutely ruined his chances for a good tip. some women would become heavily infatuated with him, believing that they were in some sort of forbidden romance. he learned to turn them down quick and easy to avoid conflict in the workplace which furthered his space as a boss favorite. but his hardest challenge by far was meeting you.

you were one of hanamaki’s friends, having met him at one of his brief stints in retail on his search for a job. he had gotten fired but you both stayed in touch after he left, becoming really close, really fast.

issei had met you first when takahiro had invited you to the biweekly seijoh third-years movie night. at first, he had been pissed as an “outsider” had never been invited before and he was worried you’d ruin the vibe, especially since it was the first time in months that oikawa would be able to join them. makki vouched for you through and through and the other boys were okay with it so you were in. the second he met you, all his fears of awkwardness and discomfort faded away.

you were great.

you were hilarious, pretty, and could keep up with makki’s harsh jokes, tooru’s diva attitude, iwa’s tendency to hit (hard), and issei’s original disdain. by the end of the night, he had completely forgotten why he didn’t want you there in the first place.

from then on, you were a staple in their little friend group. you were added to the groupchat where you balanced memes with spouts of deep wisdom and you were ever so reliable, always there if any of them needed it.

yeah, you were great. that’s where the problems started.

issei’s feelings for you quickly went from platonic to romantic, faster than you can say godzilla. he hadn’t even recognized that he was falling for you until it was way too late. normally, he wouldn’t have a problem confessing to you but because of his newly found ...occupation, he was too nervous. how would you take it that he was basically a glorified prostitute? ok, that wasn’t exactly what he did but still! you’d probably find him disgusting and horrible and leave the friend group forever. then he’d have to deal with oikawa’s senseless whining and makki’s subtle digs, blaming him for your departure. yeah, he wasn’t going to put himself through that so he decided to keep his mouth shut.

too bad he didn’t have any control over makki’s.

you and takahiro had been on a little friend-date at mcdonald’s after you’d had a long and frustrating shift. you just wanted to vent, expressing your general hate for your job and desperate need for stress relief.

that’s when makki opened his (big, stupid) mouth and suggested that you visit a little place called coffee and cunnilingus. you nearly choked on your fries at the title before quickly pressing him for details. thankfully, he had the decency not to expose that issei worked there but he had not done a good enough job convincing you not to go there. not that it would’ve mattered. your curiosity was peaked and your libido was high so why not try out the weird cafe where you let a complete stranger stick his tongue inside you?

it was settled. you were going to go and you were going to get eaten out and you were going to like it!

or at least that is what you repeated in your head as you walked to the address on your phone before taking a deep breath and walking inside.

“hello, welcome to coffee and cunnilingus, how might i pleasure you this afterno— yn?” issei’s eyes widened as they met your equally bewildered ones, the both of you staring at each other in shock.

“matsukawa-san, is everything alright?” a large hand rested on issei’s shoulder, startling him out of his thoughts and forcing him to break (horrified) eye contact with you and move it onto his boss who was now looking down on him menacingly.

“y-yes sir, everything is fine!” he squeaked out, hating the way his voice cracked on his first syllable. his boss looked at him suspiciously but thankfully didn’t press.

“well, since nothing is wrong, take this beautiful young woman to a booth where you will assist her!” the hand resting on issei’s shoulder slowly squeezed, making him wince in pain. the pain was only an afterthought though to the larger implication of his boss’ words. he’s going to assist you. assist as in pleasure. pleasure as in eat you out.

holy shit, you were going to pass out.

apparently, issei had the same thought process as you, his face whitening like a sheet. “m-me? but sir i-“

“do your job matsukawa-san!” his boss cut him off with a forced smile. all issei could do was nod and silently lead you off to a closed booth near the back or lose his job. you stayed close behind him but remained quiet, absolutely terrified of breaking the silence and ruining the bubble you had created.

you finally reached the booth in question. issei gently opened the curtain and motioned for you to get it, to which you obliged and he followed just behind.

the moment the curtain closed, you were enveloped in an awkward silence and tense atmosphere, neither of you speaking or looking at one another for fear of one of you running out. after what felt like hours, you opened your mouth to speak, not realizing issei had thought the same thing.

“so-“

“i-“

you finally made eye contact with him and burst into the laughter, the tension quickly broken. it took a full minute or two for the both of you to calm down, the absurdity of the entire situation finally catching up with you.

“you first,” issei said, wiping tears from the corners of his eyes while fixing you with an intense gaze swirled with an emotion you couldn’t quite place but it made butterflies bubble up in your stomach. you quickly turned your gaze to the comfortable seat beneath you, your fingers playing with the red stitching while you thought of what you had wanted to say.

“are you any good?” your hand flew up to cover your mouth as your cheeks filled with heat, the embarrassment of your words catching up to you. you hadn’t meant to say that but when you opened your mouth to apologize, you were stopped in your tracks by the lovely sound of issei’s full-bodied laughter filling the tiny booth.

you had heard it just moments earlier but without the sound of your own giggles drowning it out, you couldn’t help but think that he sounded beautiful. you basked in the sound as it slowly trailed off back into silence. now it was you doing the staring making issei look off with a red face and a heart threatening to pound out of his chest.

“y-yeah i’m pretty good. you want to try? me, i mean?” his words nearly leave you gasping, your brain working overtime to try and comprehend what he was saying to you.

“only if y-you want to? what do you want issei?” you whispered, suddenly unable to find your voice. you wanted this to be okay for him too; you didn’t want him to be uncomfortable even though you wanted him more than you could verbally express. despite the embarrassment and fear of rejection lingering under your skin, you stared at him, awaiting his answer. a tiny minuscule nod came from him and you internally shook your head. you needed to hear him.

“i need you to say it, issei.” your words, while quiet, were firm and issei felt himself hardening in his uniform slacks. he swallowed in his increasingly drying mouth before opening his mouth to respond.

“i want to eat your pussy. can i?”

shit.

your own voice was stolen by his words and all you could give him was a nod before he was on you.

issei didn’t waste any time falling to his knees, pulling your panties down, and hiking your skirt up to your stomach, revealing your glistening folds to his hungering eyes.

“fuck, you’re so wet,” is all the warning you get before he’s licking a long stripe up you from entrance to clit before he’s sucking the hard, sensitive nub into his mouth. your eyes immediately rolled back into your head, your hips instinctively bucking up into his mouth while a gasped moan of issei left your lips.

if he could bottle your moans and use them whenever he pleased, he would, the sound sending another pulse of arousal to his already hard cock. he was tempted to reach down and pull himself out of his trousers but he denied himself. this was about you; you and your wet ass pussy.

issei continued his ministrations on your clit, circling it with his tongue before pulling it into his mouth while his hand was ready to get busy. it crept up your thigh, sending shivers down your spine until it reached your sopping entrance, two of his fingers teasing the slit before delving in to the third knuckle.

the moan you let out is borderline animalistic as your body sends another wave of slick pulsing out over his hand. he groaned into your cunt at your tightness, his mind only imagining him deep within you while you squeeze him for all he’s got.

the amount of slick you produced made it easy for him to add a third finger, thrusting them in and out while also crooking them upwards in search for your special spot that would have you seeing stars. it took him a little prodding but he knew he found it when your back arched, your hand came down into his hair, and you whimpered out a string of curses.

“that’s it baby, cmon, you’re doing so well, wanna see you come apart for me,” he all but growled against your clit before delving back in with a higher intensity, his desperation for you to come winning out his desire to tease you and drag this out as long as possible.

with his incessant pressure on your g-spot and his lips suctioned around your clit, it wasn’t long before he got what he wanted.

“isseiisseiisseiissei, i’m coming, i’m coming-oh fuck!” you screamed as you clenched and gushed all over his fingers, your entire body caving in with the intensity of your orgasm. his fingers were practically forced from your spasming cunt but they quickly found a place rubbing your nub side to side as fast as possible. the overwhelming urge to pee came over you and you shook your head, trying to push his hand away.

“no, no, give it to me, i know you can,” issei groaned, his eyes locked on your dripping pussy. the pleasure he was giving came to a head at his words and you felt a clear liquid escape from your tired, overstimulated cunt, your mouth opening in a silent moan before collapsing back on the seat.

the sight proved to be too much for issei as he felt his body tense, his own orgasm washing over him as he emptied himself into his boxers. he fell back onto the ground, in shock of himself coming entirely untouched. he’d never done it before but of course it was you that would bring it out of him. a smile spread across his face at the thought, his head tilting back as he laughed, catching the attention of your worn body.

“what’re y’laughing at?” you slurred, cringing a little at how fucked out you sounded but issei didn’t seem to mind, his face glowing while covered in your slick and cum.

“nothing, nothing, but uh, i have a question.” you felt your heart leap to your chest, your mind already racing with the possibilities. he’s going to say this was a mistake, that we’re just better off as friends. oh god, what if he says i stunk? or the worst pussy he’s ever had? or what if—

“want to go and get a coffee?” he asked, the smile still plastered on his face but with an uncharacteristic hint of shyness. the butterflies were back in your stomach as you shyly nodded before allowing him to help clean you up and standing, not missing how he slipped your lacy underwear deep into one of his pockets.

issei’s hand found its way into yours as he said goodbye to his coworkers and boss before leading you out of the cafe, watching you tell an animated retelling of the bullshit that occurred at your job with a warm grin on his face and pink cheeks.

it might not be like matsukawa issei to be embarrassed but if it resulted in getting you by his side? he would do it again and again.

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shurisneakers · 3 years

Text

shut in [epilogue]

Summary: When your high profile mission goes terribly wrong, you’re forced to hide in a safehouse with a man you’ve never met before. With seemingly nowhere else to go, you’re forced to work together to figure out who is trying to have you assassinated before it’s too late. (Sam Wilson x Reader, Hitman AU)

Warnings: anxiety, ptsd, swearing

Word count: 4k

A/N: annnnd we’re done :)) thank you to my resident bully @midnightsunfae for really getting this fic off the ground and helping with the planning. ily upo and thank you to everyone who’s read this series over the 5 months it’s been going on. it’s meant the absolute world to me :’)

Previous Part || Shut In Masterlist

Your fingers tapped rhythmically against the table, an indicator of the nervousness that was building to a crescendo in your chest.

“Are you sure you wanna do this?” he asked, hand placed gently on your forearm.

You nodded, eyes downcast. If you looked at him, you wouldn’t be able to find it in yourself to follow through with it.

“I am,” you said quietly, swallowing to get rid of the lump in your throat.

“Okay,” he confirmed, letting his arm drop gently.

Ten minutes to go. You took a sip of water nervously. The glass had already found itself shifting back and forth on the table in search of the perfect place. It was a fruitless quest anyway.

The door was painted a dark green, steps leading up to it from the pavement.

“Are you sure he won’t mind?” you asked quietly, standing a stair below him in apprehension. Neither of you had contacted him or sent a message, just showed up at his place exhausted and covered in a thin layer of dirt.

“I know he won’t.” Sam raised his fist to knock thrice, a pause before knocking two more times.

A code.

He turned around slightly, checking to see if you were fine. The longer you stood out there, the more afraid you were of someone spotting the both of you, putting an end to your life before it even began. You had a feeling that paranoia would continue for a long time.

The door swung open, revealing a tall man with blonde hair leaning against the doorway with one arm. There was a nick above his eyebrow, an old scar that hadn’t faded over time. Even though his other hand was concealed behind the door, you could tell that he was holding something by the way his muscles were clenched. Years of training wouldn’t disappear overnight.

"Sam." Surprise overtook his face in a second. "You're alive."

"Don't sound so happy, I can't handle it." Sam rolled his eyes, an affectionate smile on his face. "This is Y/N, we need a place to stay."

“It’s just been a while since I heard from you, man. Coming from a hit?” Riley didn’t think twice about moving aside, scrutinising dried blood on your person as you walk past. “Nice to meet you, I’m Riley.”

It was a cane in his hand. Sam’s mention of his limp flashed in your mind.

You gave him a small wave and a quiet re-introduction of yourself, following Sam into the house.

“You could say that.” Sam paused, a hand on Riley’s shoulder as he says something out of your ear shot to him.

Riley’s face turned stoic immediately, a nod of his head and a deep exhale soon following. “Stay as long as you need.”

“Thank you.” You pressed your lips together in a straight line with a corner quirked upwards, a half smile of sorts.

“Bathroom’s down the hall, to the right.” He pointed out the direction. “I’m getting you some food. Gumbo still your thing, Wilson?”

“Anything other than peanut butter.”

Riley was a blessing you could have never prepared for; knowing exactly what you both would need and anticipating emotions you had no idea you’d be feeling. For someone who had guests show up completely uninvited to crash on his couch, he was ready as ever, given that he had been through the same thing a while ago.

It was difficult. Fuck that, it was one of the hardest things to go; not pretending like everything around you would fall into soon and that you would be fine because you had to. You had worked too damn hard for you not to be.

But you knew things weren’t going to be fine right off the bat and it would be foolish to think it was.

“Sam, look at me,” you commanded gently, but there was an edge of firmness to your tone. You were sitting on the bench near the entrance of the park.

“I’m sorry, things were going good and I thought-” He shook his face that was hiding in his palm, elbows resting on his knees.

His attacks didn’t come nearly as frequently as yours. It was easy to think that he had no trauma just because he learnt how to deal with it better.

“Look at me, Sammy.” It was just a walk in the park, a stroll that should have lasted twenty minutes tops. You had been on that trail before for the same purpose but something triggered him today, someone’s gaze who lingered too long on the both of you.

He clenched his fists, lifting his head to meet your gaze.

“Breathe with me.” You exaggerated the movements to have him follow, a system the both of you had come up with when anxiety attacks used to hit at random. A temporary solution to an aftermath that would go on for hours, days even.

It took him a few staggered breaths to get there, finally falling into routine with you. He could feel his heartbeat slow to what it was but the pit in his stomach wouldn’t subside for a while.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t-”

“You have nothing to apologise for,” you reassured, still making sure he was breathing with you. You were nervous too and your eyes were still darting about to survey your surroundings, but he needed you at that moment. “We’re safe. We’re okay.”

“No one’s here,” he mumbles, interlacing your fingers and bringing it to his forehead to lean against your hand.

“We’re okay,” you repeated, giving him the space he needed. “We’re okay.”

“Will someone be joining you?” The waiter prodded softly. If it wasn’t your incessant tapping at the table, the clammy palms and constant checking of your watch was a clear giveaway that you could use a bit of kindness that day.

“Yeah, any minute now.” You smiled at her. She simply nodded, refilling your glass of water before leaving you alone.

You looked at your watch and sighed.

Seven minutes.

Things were fine. Things were good.

Sam and you were… undefined. Labels almost seemed too constrictive for now and it wasn’t like the both of you didn’t know what the other felt. It was kind. It was soft. Sometimes you kissed his cheek when the sunlight bounced off his face while he watered the succulents and the smile he gave you was addictive. Other times he snaked an arm around your waist and leaned his head on your shoulder while you watched the street from the kitchen window.

It made you happy, and so you tried to force away the stem of doubt that creeped into your heart.

Riley had introduced the concept of movie nights and the occasional mob movie would make it in there just to poke fun at. He showed you around the city, inviting you to go grocery shopping with him at the farmers market, the best places to get a glimpse of the music scene or to subtly point out potential date night spots.

He was a genuinely nice guy, and if you thought Sam was fun to hang out with, you were not prepared for the both of them together. You could tell why Sam adored him.

“Y/N, I don’t know how you stayed with him for all that time and didn’t murder him in his sleep.” Riley glared at Sam who had once again left his collection of music CDs strewn around on a couch. It was all in jest; it was well known that Sam found an anchor in music that kept him up late at night for a sense of calm.

“It was a close call sometimes,” you added playfully, giving Sam a grin.

“You weren’t exactly easy to survive with either.” He scoffed. “How many times did we watch Megamind in a row? Eight?”

“You wouldn’t stop watching Die Hard,” you accused, arms crossed over your chest. “It was payback.”

“You made the rule saying we couldn’t watch things more than twice in a row and you broke it first.”

“I’m gonna go,” Riley interjected. “But y’all keep at this. I heard it’s good for your soul.”

“Stay there,” Sam demanded, pointing to where he was standing a second ago. “You’re gonna be play judge since you started this shit.”

“I really don’t want to.” He shook his head, staying put nonetheless, amusement clear as day on his face.

“The laundry.”

“The dishes.”

You both narrowed your eyes at each other. His argument didn’t hold a match to yours.

“You know what, I was wrong,” Riley announced to no one in particular. “I’m pretty sure you guys would kill each other under any other circumstance.”

The smile on your face faltered but you straightened it back out with a clearing of your throat before firing a comeback.

It was barely a second, almost unnoticeable. But Sam caught it.

Four minutes.

Almost time.

The tapping became more intense, and the rate at which you pulled out your phone to check the time increased.

Fuck, this was a bad idea. How were you supposed to behave with him after all this time?

Something was wrong. Something was off.

Sam wasn’t blind to it. He could see it under the smile you eased into at game night, the complaining when too much food was ordered for three people to eat, the good natured teasing when he rolled over to your side of the bed at night to steal your blanket.

Something was eating at you, gnawing at you from the inside.

His suspicion was confirmed when you whispered at 2am one night to what you thought was an asleep partner that you wanted to move out. Find a place of your own.

His stomach dropped instantly but he didn’t so much as move a muscle.

“I need to get out. I need to have a life,” you sniffed, doing your best not to wake him up as you traced circles into his skin lightly. “I don’t know what it’s like to be independent. I won’t know unless I figure it out myself.”

The air had a chill to it and it was one of the times you had asked him to sleep in the guest bedroom with you instead of on his own, knowing that it was one of those nights where you could use a little extra warmth.

“Even when we were in there I couldn’t stop thinking about whether this thing between us was just because we were forced to stay together. You said it wasn’t, and I know that but I can’t help but think-” Your voice cracked. “Would you come back to me if things were different?”

He didn’t answer, even though he knew what he wanted to say with all the certainty in the world. Your fingers continued to draw on his skin. He continued to let you.

Sam didn’t even bring up the conversation that morning, or that week. Instead, he held you a bit closer whenever he could and gave you the space to hopefully open up to him on your own time, letting you know that he’d be there to listen.

It took a while. You both were in the middle of watching a movie that wasn’t Die Hard when you told him that you needed to talk to him about something. The hesitancy in your voice and the fixation your fingers had with the hem of your sweater was painful to witness.

He understood, of course. He always did. That you needed to experience what it was like to live, not survive. That decades of living with other kids, living under an abuser, living in a safehouse for months, was restrictive and suffocating and you needed to find what made you happy.

And so did he. It was something both of you had to do eventually, exit the bubble you had been staying in under such ardent protection for those two months.

Riley was wonderfully supportive of it, vowing to find you the best apartment that New Orleans had to offer. You didn’t doubt it.

His place had been colourful and bright and everything you could have asked for after the monotone walls you were used to. But it wasn’t yours.

A few weeks later you had moved out. Sam left a lingering kiss on your forehead, a sign to say that he’d be here whenever, whatever.

You made a Shakira joke. He laughed.

A completely fresh new start. If you failed now, it was all on you.

And what a terrifying thought that was.

It had been four months since you had left Riley’s apartment behind.

Four months since you had seen either of them.

The cafe was starting to feel too small for this event. Too intimate, too-

When the bell above the cafe chimes, something at the back of your mind instantly wakes up, sending you on high alert.

“Y/N?” he called out from behind you.

You knew he’d be early.

“Sam.” You breathed out, standing up to face him.

Video calls didn’t do him any justice. He had a particular glow to him, an aura of confidence that wasn’t there the last time you saw him. His beard was neatly trimmed and the smile that tugged at his lips the minute you caught his eye was beautiful.

You didn’t realise how different he looked until the time apart. Months of makeshift workouts and peanut butter as your only source of protein had done a number on him. You remembered him being leaner, and what you now realised was the constant burden of fatigue on his face.

“You look good.” An understatement escaped you, but he did.

He had a deep blue shirt on that hugged him in all the right places. Months of seeing him only black and grey had you damn near drooling when he wore other colours after you got out.

Not that you were staring, but his biceps had definitely made a wonderful return.

“You’re not so bad yourself.” Sam sent you a smile that instantly put you at ease. “Independence looks good on you, sweetheart.”

You gave a small laugh, gesturing for him to take a seat. Should you have hugged him? Shook his hand? Kissed hi-

“It’s been a while,” he politely interrupted your overthinking. “How are things going?”

You let out a small breath. It was a big question, one that you had answered over text and call a few times but it was different now. He was in front of you now and you couldn’t bullshit the way you used to on call occasionally.

“Weird,” you admitted. “I don’t know what to do with myself now that I have all this time.”

“It takes some gettin’ used to.” He nodded in agreement, leaning back in his chair.

A lot of your time went into trying new hobbies. Knitting, pottery, drawing- anything that you could get your hands on. Things didn’t always catch on, some discarded just after the first week. Others stuck, bringing you bits of triumph every time you moved forward with your newfound skill.

“You still seein’ your therapist?” He flashed a smile at the waitress who filled his glass of water.

Ah, yes. Dr. Bishop had been one of the first people you sought out.

“Yeah.” You took a sip of water. “See her weekly.”

You still had money left over from all the hit jobs that you had done. As much as you wanted to leave every inkling of that life behind, you needed the cash to live. You had enough for the time being, but you knew that eventually you had to start working; if not for the money then for the peace of mind.

“How’s that goin’?”

“She thinks I talk in elaborate metaphors. The gang’s what I call my toxic family, he was my abusive father, stuff like that.”

There were moments where you thought you saw someone you knew standing at a corner, vendors giving you icy looks from across the street, footsteps outside your door that seemed too damn loud. But nothing ever came of it.

“Thanks for the tip, by the way.” You extended a smile to him in appreciation for the idea.

“Worked with my therapist, figured it would be the same with yours.” He shrugged casually. It wasn’t like you wanted to lie to her, and you weren’t. But some things were better left in the dark.

“But I think it’s helping.” You exhaled deeply, eyes downcast. “The nightmares are reducing.”

“That’s a lot of progress.” The corner of his mouth quirked upward in pride.

Several feelings erupted from that look, some that you’d spend the whole day revelling in if you didn’t force yourself to move on.

“How about you?” you diverted the subject back to him. “How’s Riley?”

“He says he misses ya.” Sam laughed. “Says he can’t handle me alone, that he needs you back to save him.”

“What have you been doing to that poor man?” you teased, easing back into your seat. “He was fine when I left him.”

“He’s got a fancy new job now and it’s been going to his head. Needed a little humbling.”

“You’re not going too hard on him, are you?” Even though you knew he wasn’t, it was fun to make sure.

“Nah, I’d say it’s just about the right amount.” Sam grinned and you felt the familiar flutter return to your stomach. “I’ve been doing good. Working on getting my license.”

“Oh yeah, how’s that going?” You were thrilled when he said he was going to look into becoming a youth counselor, knowing that it was something he had been genuinely wanting to do for ages.

“With my background, or lack of it, it’s a little trickier than I thought it would be,” he divulges a bit more seriously. “Riley’s been pulling a few strings and I got a few contacts but it’s gonna take some more time.”

You bit your lip, worry rising for him. He deserved it, he earned it. It fucking sucked that it wasn’t going to be an easy, direct path.

“We’ll figure it out,” you said quietly, reaching out to intertwine your fingers with his in reassurance.

The contact brings with it a small spark. You wondered if he still felt it.

“Yeah. We will.” He sent you a soft smile at your action, not making any effort to move it. “You been on any dates lately?”

You let out a snort at that. “Loads. Have fellas lining up at every corner for me.”

“I bet.” He’s more bold, a bit more open than he was in the first month when you both got out. “How many of them do I have to fight off?”

“I’d say six as a rough estimate.” Your expression mimicked one of consideration. “I hope you’ve been getting your hours in at the gym.”

“I’ll kick it up a notch,” he promised, hands raised in surrender.

“You better. We’re supposed to go for laser-tag.” A dumb callback to a joke he made on one of your last days there.

“Or paintball.” He remembered. It made you unnecessarily giddy. “I added an escape room to the list too.”

“Hilarious,” you fired at him, rolling your eyes slightly but the happiness on your face proved otherwise.

His laughter died down eventually, paving the way for the comfortable silence that lingered between you both. Your eyes fell down to where your hand still held his, biting your lip to conceal a smile.

“Y/N,” he called out, pulling your gaze back to his. “Jokes aside… how are you?”

You let out a breath at his question. You knew it was coming.

“Riley found me an apartment,” you murmured.

Sam looked up from his phone. “Yeah?”

“It’s a nice place. Lots of sunlight. Quiet too.” You toyed with your fingers. “But it’s about an hour away. More if you consider traffic.”

Sam set his phone down gently on the bedside table, indicating that you had his full attention.

“I don’t want you to think I’m abandoning you, because I’m not. I wouldn’t, I just-”

“Hey,” he interrupted calmly, twisting his body to face you. “I don’t think you’re abandoning me. If this is what you need, then you should do it.”

“I don’t know if this is what I need. I don’t know what I’m doing, I’ve never been-” the frustration in your voice only increased as you went on. “-I don’t even know if this is going to work. What if I hate it?”

“Finding out what you hate is just as important as what you like, I think.” He watched you toy with the fidget square he had gotten you. “And you know that if you don’t feel like it, then you can come back here at any moment.”

“I know.” It was a comforting thought. A safety net.

“But would this make you happy?” That caught you by surprise.

It wasn’t something you had thought of. You thought of the negative consequences, the devastating effects it could have on you, how it could be the worst possible decision you’d ever make.

“I don’t know,” you mumbled, a new anxiety setting in. “I guess we’ll see.”

You liked the neighbours who played the piano way too loud at 2am, the really terrible coffee at the therapist’s office and the feeling the paper plane on your dresser gave you when you occasionally looked at it.

You didn’t like how hot the apartment could get, especially during the afternoon, or the guy who sold magazines down the street who cursed at everyone for no reason, or the gentrified Indian food they served at the mall.

But Sam was right. Figuring out what you didn’t like was just as beautiful a journey as figuring out what you did.

“I’m happy.” You breathed out. “Or I'm working towards being happy. But it’s there.”

He doesn’t say anything to that. Simply slipped his palm under yours to lift your hand, pressing a kiss to your knuckles.

“I’m proud of you.”

If anyone could feel the heat that rose to your face they would probably think you had a fever.

The fear that you had, the one of what things would be like if you weren’t forced to survive in a confined space together, had begun to fade the minute he called out your name that day.

It was Sam. Your Sam.

You shake yourself out of your train of thought with a small smile, making a move to gather up your belongings without letting go of his hand for a second.

“Well, c’mon then. Those paintballs aren’t going to shoot themselves.”

“Are you saying this is a date?” There was a smirk on his face that wasn’t there a minute ago.

“Would you still consider it one once I annihilate you?” You tilted your head in a challenge.

“That would never happen, first of all.” He scoffed. “Second… I was thinking that maybe we could do something normal for a change.”

That had you more interested than the prospect of adventure sports. You had enough of it for a lifetime, frankly speaking.

“Lead the way, Cinnamon.” He only rolled his eyes at the nickname, sending you a vaguely threatening look. You just laughed.

“This place got good coffee?” He looked around at the establishment and its patrons.

“One of the best.”

“Then I don’t see why we have to go anywhere else,” he offered and you nodded, relaxing back into your place with the same sense of warmth in your heart that only intensified with his proposal.

He raised his hand up to flag the server, the same girl who had been helping you out since you got there, asking for two menus.

The smile he sent her was infectious. It was good.

“Sam,” you began quietly. “I missed you.”

His eyes softened, the sunlight reflecting in it making it shine like dravite. “I missed you, too.”

“Ready to order?” The waitress stands beside you with a notepad.

He looked at you and you nodded with a smile.

Things were different. You were different.

And he still came back to you.

--fin--

here’s my ko-fi if you’d like to support my writing <3

thank you so much for reading!

251 notes · View notes

lis-likes-fics · 3 years

Text

Exhilarated

Pairing: Carlisle Cullen x Reader Word Count: 4,602 words heheh Warnings: Car crash (again), smut Author's Note: Took too long because I'm ✨inconsistent✨.

~~~~~

Y/N sighed deeply as she drove down the dark road, headed back home from out of town. A friend of hers had invited her to her birthday party and she accepted, reassuring Carlisle that she would stay safe while she was out. He had promised her that he would always be by her side, and he took the promise to heart. He was reluctant to let her go by herself, but she convinced him that she would be alright.

Now she was on her way home to Carlisle. She was peering through her windshield when her phone began ringing beside her, the sound was loud and it startled her. She tore her attention away from the road for a moment to decline the phone call, she'd pick it up when she stopped.

Y/N looked back up to the road, cursing loudly when she saw a deer beginning to cross the road. She yanked on the steering wheel, swerving out of the way of the deer that had frozen in the street, staring at the lights that flashed at it.

The car jerked over, just missing the deer. Y/N slammed on the breaks as hard as she could and the car skid across the road. She crashed into a tree, the airbag deploying and smacking Y/N in the face, disorienting her for a moment.

It when she smelled the gas when she knew she had to get out of the car as fast as possible. Her heart pounded in her chest, she could hear her pulse in her ears. She opened her door, struggling to move her legs as she looked down. She groaned when she saw her foot stuck in the car, preventing her from moving.

She wiggled her feet out of her shoes and managed to get her legs out of the car. Just as she was out of the car, the vehicle blew, throwing her in the air from the impact of the explosion.

She let out a strangled yelp when she landed on hard, rolling over the ground before being abruptly halted by smacking another tall tree. Another cry escaped her as she felt a terrible pain in her lower back that soon spread all over her body. She was sure something was broken, and it was something vital. Blood soon started dropping her mouth, creating a bad taste in her mouth.

As if she'd be able to summon him, she choked out a strangled call, "Carlisle…" Her voice was barely audible or understandable, but she didn't stop. She needed him. Her body hurt so badly, she was in need of his aid.

However, it seemed as though he could hear her calls as a black Mercedes came racing down the road to get to her, screeching to a stop before the door was opened and Carlisle was coming out to her within the next second.

He was kneeling at her side, looking her over with worried eyes as he spoke, "What is it with you and cars?"

She chuckled weakly, wincing and coughing up more blood. "I'm sorry," her voice cracked as she got the words out. He shook his head, placing a hand on her cheek, "It's not your fault, dear."

He continued looking her over, trying to make note of everything wrong. She spoke, struggling to get the words out of her mouth, "Carlisle, I can't m-move my legs."

Carlisle acknowledged her words, "I'm going to move you onto your stomach, okay?" She gave him a nod and allowed him to do so. He felt around her back along her spine, asking her questions about how it felt and what happened.

At the end of his assessment and her recap, he let out a heavy breath and gave her a sad look. She couldn't comprehend it, she had started to fade in and out of focus, looking around her surroundings.

When she hit her back so hard on the tree, it fractured part of her spine and paralyzed her from the waist down. Along with that, she was bleeding internally and he knew she wouldn't have enough time before she actually passed out. He knew it would be bad if she passed out, it wouldn't end well at all.

And he couldn't lose her.

With glazed eyes, Y/N turned her scarce attention to Carlisle, "What's….wrong?"

Her breath had become heavy, the other effects of the accident were starting to sink in. Carlisle looked her in the eyes, as if he was memorizing every detail in them. She weakly moved an arm with the intention of placing her hand on his cheek. He took her hand in his, holding it to his cheek as he savored the warmth of her hand.

"Carlisle-?" His name was interrupted by a painful cough that riddled through her. He told her with a sad voice, crying without tearing up. "I don't think you're going to make it. You got hurt really badly."

She wasn't concerned about herself, she was concerned about him. She didn't want to leave him alone, she didn't want to leave his side after promising a million times a day that she never would.

Fresh tears stained her face to cover the old ones, not from physical pain but from emotional pain. "I'm not leaving you," she whispered in a hoarse voice.

He sighed and nodded, "I know. You'd never forgive me if I let you, and I'd never forgive myself if I let you."

She knew what he was getting at. For a moment, she was scared of the physical pain that would come with his cure, but the fear ceased when it was challenged with the despair of even the thought of leaving Carlisle's side.

She gave a weak smile and nodded, "Do it…"

He had a pained expression on his face as he considered the option again. It was the only option where she would come out alive-- or at least for the most part.

Carlisle stroked the side of her face with his thumb, gazing over her features as he looked past the injuries, looking at her true self as if it was the last time he'd see it.

He whispered in a clear but saddened voice, "I'm going to miss these eyes." She smiled at him, swallowing thickly.

Carlisle lifted her head carefully, kissing her deeply with as much meaning as he could without hurting her further. She kissed him back, it was one thing she could focus on fully with her mind slipping in and out of attention.

He whispered in her ear, "I'm so sorry."

She shook her head and told him in a broken voice, "I love you."

He kissed the side of her face, "I love you, too."

He braced himself before finally biting into her neck, his teeth piercing the skin and drawing blood. He fought off his urge to suck her dry quite well, more focused on saving her than he was on tasting her blood.

Y/N inhaled sharply, a strangled sound caught in her throat as she tried her hardest to hold in her scream. She could feel the venom already spreading over her body, burning her up from the inside out with such excruciating pain.

When Carlisle finished, he wiped his mouth and gazed at her painfully. He hated seeing her in pain, he hated seeing her looking so broken.

Try as she did, she couldn't stop the cries from leaving her body. Carlisle wiped at her tears as she squeezed her eyes shut tight, every fiber of her being struggling through the pain.

It felt like she had been lit on fire, for a moment she thought she would be hurting like this forever. She screamed and writhed in unbridled pain, her body jerking all over the place as she clenched and stretched her fingers repeatedly.

She almost wished the bottom half of her body stayed paralyzed, but she decided not to. It was better to go through the pain and spend eternity with Carlisle than it was to die and leave him without the love of his life.

Y/N opened her eyes, forcing a breath out of her lunges before sucking another back in. Her eyes fell on Carlisle. She found some remedy, thought very little, for the pain as she looked into his eyes. Beyond the agony he felt for putting you through such pain, she could see the love he felt for her that justified the physical pain.

It was that love that made him strong enough to do what he needed to do.

She didn't know how long she would be in this state-- it was different for everyone-- but she knew it would be worth it if it meant she would get to spend forever with him.

Y/N had been moved by Carlisle to his home, they couldn't stay out in the middle of nowhere while she was turning. In the safety of the home, she continued through the change.

She felt bad for putting everyone through the ordeal of having to listen to her pained screams as she turned. They wouldn't blame her for that, of course. They knew the pain she was in, they'd endured it before. That didn't stop her from feeling like she was burdening them. If only she'd been a little more careful, they wouldn't have to go through the mess that is changing.

While Edward could hear the thoughts she was having while she turned, he wasn't in the room to dissuade her from thinking those thoughts. Carlisle was right by her side the entire time. He refused to leave her, nothing his children could say would make him for even a second.

They eventually had to move Jasper out of the house. Her change was affecting him because, along with the physical pain, she was going through the emotional pain of having to watch Carlisle watch her turn. It hurt her to cause him any pain and Jasper wasn't holding up because of it.

She was in transformation for four days.

If she hadn't known physical pain before, she definitely did now. While changing made her exhausted, once she was a vampire, the exhaustion disappeared into a drained feeling.

She looked around the room, as if seeing everything for the first time. She could see every small detail in everything she laid eyes on.

She felt this strange feeling in her throat and chest, as if something was wrong, something was going against her natural instinct.

She finally put a finger on it when she realized she hadn't started breathing yet. She didn't need to, so she hadn't realized it when she didn't.

She took in a deep breath, her chest rising and falling. She could smell so many different things at one time: the trees outside, the fresh morning dew, each distinctive smell of each person throughout the entire house.

She listened closely to the sounds around her, the quiet shuffles of the residents in the house, the chips of birds outside, the light breathing of someone sat next to her.

She turned her head to look at the person next to her. A smile spread across her face as she gazed at him, looking at every small detail of his face, listening to every breath he took as he watched her with his own large smile.

"Hey," he spoke, his voice barely above a whisper but perfectly audible to her. She felt as though she might cry as she stared back at him, she was so glad to see him, even if she was with him for the past four days. She was seeing him clearly, there were no tears in her eyes.

She overestimated the amount of strength she needed to use as she got off the bed Carlisle had in his room solely for her and hugged him, straddling his waist as she buried her face in his neck, holding him a little too tight.

He let out a hearty laugh at her enthusiasm, holding her to him just as tightly. She took a deep breath in, inhaling his scent and memorizing it instantly. He was perfect in every single way.

She gripped him tight, carefully not to break him as she tried not to underestimate her strength. She breathed a sigh of contentment.

When she finally let go, it was only enough so she could kiss him. As soon as their lips touched, she sighed. The kiss alone was exhilarating.

She intertwined her fingers in his hair, letting out a soft moan against his lips. His lips tasted sweet, it was a taste she'd never experienced, but she liked it-- loved it, even.

When she pulled away, it was strange to not be gasping for breath. If she were human, she would have been.

She smiled back at him again with loving eyes, "Carlisle." She was surprised by her own voice, it was clear and seemingly perfect in every way. Carlisle watched in admiration as she experienced these things as if for the first time.

She looked back at him, "I sound…"

"Beautiful," he finished with a smile, "as always."

He kissed her again, wrapping his arms more securely around her as he stood, setting her on her feet as he pulled away. He grabbed her hand, guiding her to the bathroom connected to his room, despite him not needing to use it.

Carlisle pulled her in front of the mirror, his arms wrapping around her waist from behind and his head lying in the crook of her neck. She held his arms around her, locking her fingers with his as she stared at her reflection.

It seemed as though all of her imperfections before had been corrected, painting this perfect version of herself that actually seemed to compliment Carlisle now.

Her skin was smooth like silk, her hair was styled to perfection, despite the mess it was in, her crimson eyes were deep but they shone like stars. Even if they were yet to be the honey gold of Carlisle's eyes, they were still strangely appealing to gaze into.

She had always felt like she didn't look right next to him, she felt out of sorts. He seemed like a perfect sculpture carved from the most divine marble while she was a jugged wood carving placed next to him.

Now she looked as flawless as she did, she felt like she finally completed this perfect pair they seemed to form.

She turned her attention to Carlisle, his eyes trained on her face as she looked at him through the mirror. She smiled at him, turning in his arms to lay a hand on his cheek.

She went to kiss him again, but was suddenly distracted by a burning in her throat that made her reach to touch it. Carlisle nodded lightly, "You need to feed."

She sighed softly and nodded, taking his hand in hers and allowing him to lead her out of the house. As they walked downstairs hand in hand, the Cullens were all downstairs waiting.

She paused next to Carlisle, moving her free hand to hold their intertwined hands. She felt strange under their looks like this, like there was something wrong with her. She tensed under the eyes, a strange feeling rising in her as she grew anxious. There was this strange instinct in her that made her feel threatened, thus moving her to be hostile.

But before these instincts could properly kick in, they were smiling at her and rushing over to give her hugs. She was startled for a moment when Alice rushed into her arms happily, slightly squealing at her. She settled and hugged her back, eventually exchanging hugs with everyone in the coven before getting a giant bear hug from Emmett-- and she expected nothing less than that.

They gave her a proper welcome into the coven, expressing how happy they were that she was alright. Before she could strike up some conversation, Carlisle pulled her away so she could feed. "You can catch up afterwards," he smiled at Y/N.

Y/N found that she wasn't clumsy anymore. It was as if being a vampire cured everything wrong with her and made her this perfect woman. It made her feel like she was actually worth Carlisle's time now. She never said anything before, she didn't feel like it was appropriate to, but she always believed that she was far less than Carlisle. She never believed she was really that valuable, Carlisle's reassurances could only last her for so long.

After teaching Y/N how to properly hunt, they returned home. She was smiling the whole way, happy with her new self as she walked with Carlisle.

A few days passed and Carlisle started to notice she felt a lot happier than she had when she was human. He was curious to know why the change was such a big one, she was brighter, more radiant, as if things were finally working out for her.

One night while everyone was out feeding, Carlisle and Y/N were still at home together. He questioned her, "You're happier than you used to be. Even Jasper can feel the difference."

She shrugged, "I am." The simple response was enough to make Carlisle push on. "Why weren't you this happy before?"

Y/N looked at him, her red eyes staring into his golden ones before she sighed. "I'm different now. Before I was this clumsy, accident-prone, mediocre girl and now I actually feel…strong."

Carlisle took her hand in his, bringing it up to kiss the back of it, "Y/N."

She nodded, "I know, I know. I wasn't mediocre before, and I'm not mediocre now. I'll always be special to you."

He chuckled lightly before licking his lips, "Why did you think you were mediocre?"

She shrugged and sighed, "I mean…you literally look like a perfect specimen, like a beautiful statue. I…didn't. I was unimpressive and boring. But now I'm strong and I'm beautiful and…I'm perfect now."

Carlisle said exactly what she thought he would, but it somehow still managed to hit home with her.

"Y/N," he said, "when you were human, I cherished you for what you were. I still cherish you for what you are. Do you want to know something? The only difference I see between you now and you then are the color of your eyes. You were always beautiful, you were always strong, you were always perfect, and you always will be. To be honest, I do miss the clumsiness."

She chuckled at the last part, kissing his cheek, "Yeah, because arriving at the ER at least once every two weeks was fun."

"It amazed me how much one human could get hurt in a month," he replied, a soft laugh erupting from his chest.

Y/N smiled brightly and sighed. Perhaps she was hard on herself. All of her self-doubt wouldn't disappear in one night, but perhaps it would over her time with Carlisle. He would definitely do everything in his power to make sure she knew her worth.

She leaned over to him, kissing him gently before smiling and telling him genuinely, "I love you, Carlisle."

"I love you," he smiled. He took her face in his hands, kissing her lips softly. She moved so that she was sitting in his lap, happy to be with him, as always.

Carlisle's hands smoothed over her back, his touch was soothing over her skin. She pulled away from his lips, her eyes closed, her mind focused on his hands on her. It was such a soothing and exhilarating feeling. Her skin tingled wherever his hands dragged as he watched her sigh in pleasure.

Her voice was feathery as she spoke, "What's happening?"

His smile was one of adoration, "Your senses are stronger. You can feel every touch, smell every scent, hear every sound, taste every taste, and see every sight on a higher level."

She nodded, "That makes sense." She'd never felt anything like this. But, to be fair, she'd never been in a relationship as close and intimate as with Carlisle-- or anywhere near it.

She leaned forward again, her head in the crook of his neck as she pressed her body against his. "Do it more," she whispered.

And he did. His hand glided over her skin, grazing her up her back, over her shoulders, and down her arms. His hands gripped her, his thumbs brushing her skin, before moving back up her arms and down her sides.

Y/N turned her head and kissed his neck. Carlisle's eyes fluttered closed, his hands grazing down her outer thighs, moving back up and starting over running up her back.

She adjusted herself so she straddled his waist, locking her legs behind him. She loved being this close to him, he always felt so wonderful.

"How do you feel?" He asked her in his honey smooth voice.

She smiled, "Really good." She leaned forward, her hands cupping his face affectionately before kissing him again. He hands supported her back, pulling her impossibly close.

He stood, his arms wrapping around her waist to carry her. Laying her gently on the bed, he kissed her more desperately than he had before. Y/N sighed, moving her arms to wrap around his neck.

With every second, her need for him at that moment became more than just for care. She wanted him, needed him. With every kiss, her carnal need for him grew stronger.

Carlisle didn't need to be a mind reader to know what she was thinking. He whispered into her ear, the words so delicate in the air, "Say the words, and I'm yours."

She moaned lightly, nodding her head before giving him another kiss, "I want you, I want this. Please make me yours."

He smiled, kissing her hastily. His hands moved down her sides, gripping her waist as he pressed his thumbs into them. She grabbed his shirt, initially going to take it off of him before deciding to just rip it from his body completely.

He found that amusing as he allowed the piece of fabric to fall to the floor. He chuckled lightly, shifting her to move farther onto the bed. His hands pulled down her pants eagerly. He let them drop to the floor, kicking them out of his way.

She watched him intently, her eyes clouded with lust. He smiled at her and snuck his hands into her panties, rubbing her clit expertly.

She sucked in a breath, gripping the sheets for dear life as she let out a loud moan. Carlisle couldn't believe his eyes at the sight, it was beautiful, she was beautiful.

His finger moved quickly, applying just the right amount of force. Her legs tightened around his waist, pulling him close to her. He moved back over her and kissed her again, swallowing her moans hungrily.

It was ridiculous how fast he made her reach the edge. She was getting close to meeting her release and all he did was kiss and touch her. If she was this sensitive, she could only imagine what he would feel like inside of her.

She was getting so hot thinking about it.

"Carlisle," she moaned before he stopped his ministrations, he knew how close she was. She whined and he told her in a surprisingly seductive tone, "I love the way you look when you get close, but I don't want you to come yet."

She couldn't believe his words as she looked at him pleadingly. She was so ready for him. She was so ready to feel him.

She reached down his pants, undoing his belt eagerly. His eyes closed momentarily before he looked back at her, his eyes liquid gold as he gazed at her. When she had his pants down, she palmed him through his underwear, moaning lightly.

Carlisle groaned at her contact, kissing her neck and earning a sharp gasp from her. One hand went back to his head, holding him down next to her. Her other hand continued before going to take off his boxers entirely.

She let out a soft sigh when she saw his impressive length. He wasn't small, that was for sure. He let out a sigh of his own before whispering in her ear, "Are you sure?"

She bit her lip, kissing his cheek before telling him, "Carlisle, I love you. I want to share everything with you, especially…"

Carlisle glanced at her after her hesitation. "Especially what?" He asked.

She sucked on her lip before admitting, "Especially my first time."

He shared a long, meaningful look with her. He kissed her again. Despite the disheveled state they were in, the kiss was slow and sensual and managed to convey their love for each other with such depth. When he pulled back, he gave one last look to her before she nodded confidently.

He contained eyed contact with her before sliding inside slowly. She threw her head back, closing her eyes and gasping. She let out a loud exclamation as he buried himself deep within her. He groaned into her skin.

He pulled out slowly until he was left with just the tip inside of her before pushing himself back inside. She wrapped her legs around his waist, so eager to keep him close. "Oh, please," she moaned.

Carlisle sighed, a sound so full of pleasure at hearing her voice pleaded for him like she was. His excitement exploded, he had to try and control himself.

Carlisle's breath picked up, he tried to keep himself on as much control as possible, doing his best to keep from pistoning in her.

However, when she got used to his impressive size, tightening her grip around his neck. "Oh, yes," she sighed, "More. Please, Carlisle, more."

He almost lost it when she said his name in such a way. He didn't realize just how much power she had over him until she moaned his name in her plea. He obliged to her pleas and his thrusts became faster and harder.

Her sounds filled the room and his sounds began to mix with hers from his excitement. She could feel a knot in her stomach as she felt herself getting closer to her release.

She cursed under her breath, moaning his name in his ear. Carlisle could feel her squeezing around him, which only spurred him on as his thrusts became more erratic. Her moans, her cries, her pleas, they were so seductively precious to him. He wanted to pull them from her night after night. He wanted to have her forever.

"I'm so close," she whispered, her mouth hanging open as she moaned out.

"I know," he said, "I can feel you."

She smiled, panting heavily as Carlisle thrusted into her so deliciously. He was getting so close, he was just at the edge of his release.

She sighed, the words sending them both over the edge with such force, "I love you, Carlisle."

They gasped, holding their breath as they finally reached their sweet release together. Y/N intertwined her fingers with his, kissing him deeply as she moaned into his mouth.

They chased their highs together, the feeling so intense, so euphoric, so exhilarating.

When they finally started to come down, he eased her through it. Their breaths mingled as they pulled away from the kiss. Carlisle pulled out of her. He brushed a thumb against her cheek, pulling her into another kiss.

She smiled, holding him impossibly close to her. When they pulled back from the kiss, Carlisle whispered, "I love you."

#carlisle cullen #carlisle cullen x reader #carlisle cullen x you #carlisle cullen x fem!reader #cullen #twilight #twilight fanfiction #twilight series #twilight x you #fanfiction #fanfic #carlisle x reader

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motelgirl · 3 years

Text

Adrenaline-

Todd Anderson x Reader

Request for @elirobin

A/N: My first Todd Anderson fic on tumblr!!! I hope you enjoy. Also, it’s pretty short but I’ll probably have some more dead poets society stuff out soon.

Her knee bounced up and down and her hands played with the hem of her skirt, as she sat in Nolan’s office, waiting for him to enter. She should have been used to it by now, but it still hurt. She let out a small gasp when the heavy, wooden door slammed behind her. By now, sweat began to form on the back of her neck and her head began to spin as Nolan’s footsteps echoed around the room. He eventually made it to the front of his desk, where he stood with a miserable, almost disgusted look on his face.

“My own granddaughter,” he spat. Y/N bit the inside of her cheek, avoiding all eye contact with the man.

“I should have you out of this school in an instant. You came here because of me, I can get you expelled just as easy,” his voice began to raise more, making Y/N even more nervous. Her eyes darted around the room in a desperate attempt to dodge his eyes. She only looked at him when she heard the all too familiar sound of a cane being pulled out from behind the wooden desk. She still didn’t speak a word, she was sure that if she did her voice would betray her.

“Put your hands on my desk,” she slowly moved them there. “Now!” Nolan’s voice raised again, making her move them quicker.

“I want you to count aloud,” He ordered. She nodded, tears beginning to form behind her eyelids as she braced herself for the incoming pain. He smacked the cane down onto her open palms, making her grunt quietly in pain.

“One,” she spoke out loud. Her voice was shaky, yet still you could hear the strength in it, and the contempt she had for her own grandfather. He hit them again and she breathed in, closing her eyes and looking up.

“Two,”

The practice continued until she reached five, when he finally placed the cane back down. Y/N felt her stomach turn when she looked down at the red marks on her palms. She could once again feel tears well up at the intense, stinging pain, but she refused to let them fall. Instead, she stood from the chair like she didn’t even feel a thing, and looked towards her Grandfather. He glared back, before speaking once more.

“Leave. And I don’t want you back in here again. Do you understand!” He raised his voice for what Y/n hoped would be the last time. “Yes.” She nodded, before finally deciding to speak. It was a simple word, but the way she stated it just proved to Nolan that she was lying. She left, intentionally slamming the door behind her. When she stepped outside, she noticed the boy’s eyes on her.

“What?” She looked around, trying to act as casual as possible.

“What happened?” Charlie asked, tentatively, leaning against the wall.

“Nothing. Just got chewed out a little, that’s all,” she smiled lightly at him.

“Thank god. We were sure you’d get caned for that. Probably because you’re his granddaughter,” Knox chimed in, a slight laugh of relief. Y/N bit her tongue and nodded, trying her hardest to hide the pain she was in. It worked.

“Anyways, I’m off to bed. I won’t be at the meeting tonight, sorry guys,” she spoke quickly and quietly, moving towards her room and closing the door straight behind her. The moment the door closed, she broke down. Sitting on the end of her bed, she looked at the floor as the tears began to stain her red cheeks. Her hands where red raw and they still burned.

A quiet knock on her door brought her out of her state, as she moved towards it. Opening it, she found Todd standing there with a timid look.

“What are you doing here?” She asked quietly, it at least midnight by now. She moved aside slightly, letting him in.

“I couldn’t sleep knowing you where in here.” He stated truthfully. Y/n looked at him with furrowed eyebrows.

“What do you mean? I thought you’d be at the meeting,” she sat on her bed beside him.

“No, they called it off for tonight. I think they all knew what actually happened in there,” Todd continued. Y/n looked at him, her eyes sad. She felt wrong for hiding it from them, but she didn’t want them to worry. Todd moved his hand to hers and held it out so he could look at her palm. Her cheeks where still stained by her tears and she did everything in her power to not let them fall again in that moment.

His fingers brushed over the fading red marks, making her wince slightly.

“Sorry,” he whispered. His eyes looked up to meet hers, however they only met the sides as her gaze stayed on the ground. He needed her to look at him.

“Hey, Y/n” his voice was soft. She raised her eyes to find him inches from her face. Her heart began to race as he continued.

“I- well- erm what I want to- want to say is- erm well-,” he tripped over his words. Y/n laughed lightly, placing her hand over his.

“What?” She asked.

“What I wanted to say was. I- well I- I know this probably isn’t the best time to say it- but I- erm- I really- I like you- like more than a fri-“ he was cut off by a pair of lips on his. It shocked him at first, but he kissed back moments after. Y/n placed her hand on the back of his head, the pain cancelled out by the adrenaline. Todd slowly moved his hands to her neck and back, going deeper into the kiss. Eventually, they pulled apart.

“So I’ll take that as a-“

“I like you too. More than a friend,” she laughed, finishing off his sentence. Todd’s beaming grin made her happier than she’d ever been, and she forgot all about the pain she was in.

#dead poets society #todd anderson #todd anderson x reader #dps

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jetaime-jespere · 3 years

Text

Affirmations

In response to a request, set in the WSNE universe shortly after Nora is born. TW for some references to postpartum anxiety.

word count: 1,380

Emily thought the pregnancy would be the hardest part.

The fatigue in the first trimester, coupled with near-constant nausea hit hard and fast, rendering it nearly impossible for her to work a case for almost eight weeks. Despite Aaron’s protests, Emily insisted on coming to the BAU whenever she could gather the energy to get down the stairs and into the car. She would pace into the bullpen at his side, a plastic bucket never too far away. The team would take turns telling her to go home, we can do this without you for a few weeks - but to no avail. She couldn’t be persuaded, even if most afternoons ended with her curled in a ball on the leather sofa in Aaron’s office, her hand under her cheek and a blanket tossed over her legs. The food aversions came soon after that - coffee was the first to go. She glared at Aaron before promptly vomiting one morning as he brewed a fresh pot, and threatened to toss the brand new Nespresso machine out the window in between dry heaves. Jack’s chicken nuggets followed shortly after; Aaron’s patience explaining to him just why they couldn’t get a fresh bag of dinosaur nuggets after he’d tossed the old ones nearly broke the seven year old’s heart. But Aaron explained it was to help Emily feel better, and he obliged with an innocent smile, albeit disappointed. Crackers were the only thing she could stomach until the middle of her second trimester. The body changes were a mental hurdle - her hips widened until only yoga pants felt comfortable, the varicose veins made her cringe. She adored the bump that grew underneath her shirt but loathed the heartburn and breathlessness that soon came with it.

She learned the hard way that was just the beginning.

Nora came into the world dramatically, during a snowstorm in February, and while VDOT plowed the roads and restored powerlines, Emily and Aaron spent blissful days soaking up baby snuggles, completely oblivious to everything except the tiny bundle in her arms and Jack nestled between them. The visitors came after that - an endless parade of friends - mostly the team, coming after work or on weekends, bringing meals and conversation. JJ held Nora while Emily took blissful hot showers, Penelope cleaned the kitchen and brought groceries while Morgan carried Jack around on his shoulders. Dave brought whiskey and cigars, shared with Aaron on the porch, and Emily never quite got tired of seeing their baby daughter nestled in her Godfather’s arms.

It was when things settled into what should have been a new normal, about a week after Nora’s birth, that Aaron sensed something was wrong. It started with irritability - snapping at him immediately when he brought her coffee as she finished nursing Nora. She had a short fuse with Jack, sometimes having zero patience for his persistent questions about his baby sister.

“Does Emily not like me anymore, Daddy? Now that Nora is here?” Jack tearfully wept in his lap, reminiscent of earlier years, and Aaron’s throat tightened with empathy for not only his son, but his wife too, undoubtedly struggling with more emotions than she knew what to do with. “No buddy,” he soothed. “Emily loves you very much.”

Jack wasn’t exactly convinced, but a crisis was temporarily averted.

In Aaron’s opinion, she was a natural. Breastfeeding took a few tries but Emily was a pro by now; Nora was a decent sleeper. She fed her and changed her, sang to her. Watching her with their daughter was something he’d never tire of; it gave him an inordinate sense of pride. He knew she would be a wonderful mother. He wished Emily saw it that way too. He was determined to show her that.

But there were other signs. Her appetite vanished - uncharacteristically Emily - and on more than one occasion, he watched her scrape a half-eaten plate of food into the trash can. “You’re breast-feeding, Emily,” Aaron said gently, later that night, wondering if it was worth the argument, partially concealed by the depths of his closet as he got ready for bed. “You need to take care of yourself, too.”

“I’m doing the best I can, Aaron.” Emily looked exhausted as she lifted a helplessly crying Nora into her arms. “Sometimes I don’t know I’m cut out for this.” And she swore under her breath, the baby against her shoulder, face pale as the final straw broke. “I don’t know what she wants.” Her voice cracked, the exhaustion bleeding through. “I’m failing at this.” And then she seemingly crumpled before him, sinking onto their bed with Nora in her arms. For a moment Aaron stood helpless, staring between his sobbing wife and wailing daughter, unsure of who to help first.

But then he’s across their bedroom in three strides, taking Nora out of her arms and pressing a kiss to the crown of her head. “Emily, sweetheart, please listen to me. Just listen to my voice.” He somehow gets her attention while bouncing Nora enough to settle her. “Go take a shower while I get her settled. We’ll be okay for a few minutes.”

He gets Nora settled in a record amount of time. The baby is sound asleep in the bassinet next to Emily’s bed before he nudges the bathroom door open. A thick cloud of steam greets him; Emily sits perched on the sink wrapped in a towel. Wet hair drips down her back, her head sits in her hands. It’s clear she hasn’t exactly stopped crying, either. His chest is cleaved in half as he wraps both arms around her, gently pulls her down to her feet. “Come on,” he murmurs. “Let’s get you dried off.”

Once the towel has been replaced with a set of nursing-friendly pajamas, Aaron tucks her against his chest in their bed. Emily is almost lifeless in his arms, her body succumbing to the blinding exhaustion that comes along with caring for a newborn. Aaron rocks her gently, like he’s done many times before. “Talk to me, Emily. Please.”

She buries her face in his neck, curling into herself. He shakes his head, swipes his finger under her chin and tilts her head up to meet his gaze. “Nothing you say will make me love you any less, you know that, right?”

Her breaths come erratically, an aftereffect of the tears. When she finally finds words, they come as a whisper. “For so long, all I wanted was to be a mother. And I’m failing at it.”

“No,” he says immediately, dragging his knuckles across her cheekbone, cupping her chin in his hand. “How can you think that? What could ever give you that idea?”

“I never thought it would be this hard.” She finally admits. Her teeth sink into her lower lip; she struggles to meet his eyes once again. “What if I’m not cut out for this?”

How long has she felt like this? How long has she struggled to keep it together?

“You are not failing.” Aaron holds her his chest, brushes his lips over her forehead and rubs her back in slow, sweeping circles. “Never. Not in any way, shape, or form.” His words are firm, a contrast to the gentleness of his touch. “You could never.”

“I feel like one,” she sniffles. “It seems like nothing I do is right. The house is a mess. I’m a mess. JJ made this look so easy.” Emily swipes at her eyes with the back of her hand. “I thought once she was here, it would be different but … I don’t even know. I’m so tired, Aaron.”

“We have a newborn, sweetheart. We’re supposed to be tired.” He shifts them so they’re seated more upright, but doesn’t let her pull away. He smiles when she laughs a little, the tension in her body starting to fade. “But we’re going to do it together. You and me. We’re a team.”

For the first time in what feels like days Emily finally relaxes against him as his words sink in, beaming as her eyes flutter closed. “I love you. So much.”

“I love you too. More than you would ever know. And I will tell you every day just what a wonderful mother you are.”

It’s the last thing she hears before she falls asleep in his arms.

#hotchniss #hotchniss fanfiction #aaron hotchner x emily prentiss #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #hotch x Prentiss #wsne universe #drabble #fluffy #domestic hotchniss #hotchniss fanfic #prompts

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issaxcharlie · 3 years

Text

Ghost of you (1/2)

Pairing: Luke Patterson x Fem Reader

This fic is inspired by Dancing with your ghost by Sasha Sloan and specially Ghost of you from 5SOS and one of its verses also makes an appearance.

It’s also a collaboration I did with the lovely @cookiebuba, thank you for trusting me to write it, love! (I really hope you like it🥺)

Summary: This first part is angst and is basically Y/N catching up with her boyfriend Luke one last time in the 90’s and then Luke founding her once he’s back in 2020.

And that's the only thing I'll say because I really don't want to spoil you. I also adored to write it🥺💖

1997

“Hello again, my love.

Today marks 2 years since you left, And it's still as hard as the first day. One of the hardest things is waking up. Sometimes I stay almost an hour on bed, looking towards the door. Terrified to turn to your side and find it empty again.

Every night I try to rest for hours until finally exhaustion allows me to sleep wrapped in one of your old shirts, pretending that you are quietly sleeping next to me. Sometimes I have to play the only slow song from the first and last Sunset Curve record to ease the craving of you and in the hope that it will help my mind to meet you in my dreams. Those nights when I am lucky enough to find you are what keeps me relatively sane, because no matter how much it hurts to have to say goodbye, not seeing you again would be so much more painful.

I could dream of us anywhere, doing anything. But it’s always the same dream, what I yearn most projected in it. It always starts with me opening the door of our house, you are writing a song in the living room and as soon as you look at me you smile as if you had not seen me in years, wrapping me in your arms with all your strength.

You tell me how much you love me, and that when you are without me you feel as if your soul is missing. And then you ask me to promise not to leave you again. And it hurts, it hurts like fucking hell. Because I know I’m dreaming. Because I know it’s not actually you. Because I know I can’t promise you that. And god, how much I want to promise you that.

I divert the conversation crashing my lips on yours because I don’t want to lie to you, even if it’s only a dream. You pick me up and I hang my legs around your waist. And for a second I allow myself to forget. I sink in your perfume, in your arms, in your kisses, in how your tongue feels inside my mouth, in how your hands walk all over my body, In how my name sounds almost magical in your husky voice.

We spent the rest of the day just being us. Laughing, writing, playing, singing.

I sing to you the last song I wrote, the one I wrote especially for you after the first dream. The first time it just came out naturally, like it had been there the whole time. When I woke up I decided to write it down and complete it, and the next time I dreamed you I started playing it for you, just like all the following times. Because it’s the only excuse I have to cry there, for you to comfort me. Because it’s the only way I have for you to understand a little of what I am suffering without ruining the illusion.

“Come here beautiful, you’ll never have to experience something like that, I promise. You’ll dance with the real deal.” If you only knew, love.

That's when I melt on you. The tears don’t stop falling as you practically wrap me in your arms and we dance calmly around the room, I’m sobbing like crazy while you sing in my ear to try to help me relax.

I can tell you’re freaking out, comforting someone while crying was never your strong suit, but being me you always try your best,and that was more than enough.

The dream always ends with me in your arms, when I finally calm down and our heartbeats sound as one. Everything feels good for a second until suddenly I can't hear yours anymore. I beg you to hold on to me but little by little you fade away. I try to dance alone, pretending that you are still there to try to make you reappear, but I never get it. I never get you. So I keep dancing and crying until the stabbing pain wakes me up.

And I know it sounds awful and heartbreaking, but I can assure you, If to see the shine in your eyes, hear your voice and feel your lips, I have to end up dancing with the ghost of you, I’ll do it every single time. It's worth it... you are worth it. I would happily pay for the suffering I go through when I wake up every day in order to continue living the good moments.

I officially released the song a month ago, and it's doing fairly good. I knew I had to come to tell you, and it was a good excuse to finally dare to tell you that I still find you recurrently in my dreams. You will always be the love of my life, my biggest dream. I love you Luke, yesterday, today and always.”

After talking to him for hours, she gets up, wipes her knees, and examines the tombstone of her beloved for a few more seconds before leaving the cemetery.

The only thing on her mind right now is how unfair life was with her.

2020

After several months Julie finally decided to hear the music that she used to listen with her mother at full volume every day. Iconic songs from the 90's that marked the life of her mommy and later, in some way, hers.

‘Ghost of you’ starts playing and Julie can't help but feel even more connected to the song now that she lost Rose and the boys came into her life.

Just as she thinks of them almost as if she had summoned them, Sunset Curve appears. Reggie is about to speak when Alex puts his hand on his mouth. The three turn pale and begin to search where the sound is coming from, until the three approach their friend's laptop, a tear instantly falling from Luke's eyes.

“Ghost of you by Y/N Y/L. The story says that the poor thing lost the love of her life when she was just a teenager, she couldn’t recover from that loss. 2 years later she released this song to honor his lover on the anniversary of his death, and ended being one of the most iconic songs of the 90's era."

“Dancing through our house with the ghost of you. Cleaning up today, found that old Zeppelin shirt you wore when you ran away, and no one could feel your hurt.”

There is no doubt that she wrote it for him. The pain on the young woman's face makes him want to hit his head against the wall until he’s unconscious.

Reggie and Alex aren’t in better shape, they both seem about to pass out. Julie wasn’t expecting them to be so affected over an old love song.

“I know the feeling guys, her voice is breathtaking and heartbreaking at the same time, is insane. I know she would have done a lot more of amazing music if she’d had more time.”

If Luke's heart continued beating it probably would have stopped at that very moment.

“Julie, What do you mean with If she’d had more time?”

“She died a month after releasing the song in a car accident. I think in 1997.”

THANK YOU FOR READING, part 2 HERE✨

#luke patterson imagines #luke patterson fanfic #luke patterson x y/n #luke patterson x reader #luke patterson fic #luke patterson imagine #charlie gillespie fanfic #julie and the phantoms #jatp luke #charlie gillespie imagine #jatp #jatp imagine #charlie gillespie x reader #charlie gillespie one shot #jatp one shot #jatp fanfiction #jatp fanfic

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gryffindors-weasley · 3 years

Text

A Love to Last

Draco Malfoy x Reader

Summary: Draco feels he’s got the kind of love he’s been searching for.

Word Count: 3.2k

Warnings: mentions of the dark mark, guilt, tiny bit of jealousy, self doubt, fluff, kissing

A/N: This is my entry for @dracosaurusrex song fic challenge! The song I’ve chosen is A Sunday Kind of Love by Etta James. I hope you enjoy it my lovely Ina!!

When you awoke, the bedroom was still cast in shadows as dawn had just begun to roll around, though you hadn’t anticipated it to brighten much more than it had been with the way the rain clouds swirled outside. Mornings like these had always proved to be amongst the hardest when it came to getting out of bed for the day. The warmth of your blankets, coupled with the presence of your lover just inches away, topped off with the cozy dreariness of the weather was recipe for you to stay put. But there had been one thing on your mind; Delilah’s Bakery and Tea Shop.

Draco normally had been an early riser out of habit, his work schedule leaving him no choice but to develop such a thing. However, even the overcast morning had left him reluctant to leave the comforts of the bed and start the day. He’s stirred ever since he felt you jostle the bed with your frequent tossing and turning, though, more so when he feels your gaze fixed on him.

“I can feel you staring, Darling,” he mumbles, unable to open his eyes more than just a sliver as the very tips of his fingers brush over the exposed skin of your hip. You’d been caught in your admiring.

“Was not.”

You try desperately to hold your defense, though your smile breaks through your half-stoic expression in a matter of seconds when his fingers dance over your side. A tired grin settles on his lips as he releases an airy laugh through his nose.

“You never were a good liar,” he remarks, peeking an eye open at you just so he could catch glimpse of the eye roll that was soon to follow his statement.

“It’s rather hard not to stare, you know,” you start, a wider smile beginning to spread across your lips, “especially when you��ve got a bedhead like that.”

For that, he opens his eyes fully, his gaze meeting yours when he looks up at you with narrowed eyes. His smile vanishes in favor of a frown as he props himself up on his elbow, chunks of unkempt platinum hair sticking up in the back while others fell in his eyes. “I don’t suppose you think yours is any better, do you, Darling?”

Your mouth is quick to fall agape in faux offense and his own smile returns at his triumphant remark.

“I don’t appreciate your wit at this hour, Draco,” you frown, moving to get up from your bed in reluctance. His brows knit together at your actions, his hand quick to wrap around your wrist and tug you downwards toward his lips. “You should be getting up too.”

Your words are just barely spoken, narrowly cut short as his lips meld with your own in a languid kiss, morning breath and all. It was soft and tender, his hum tickling against your mouth in a way that brought back your smile again.

“And why is that?” He murmurs, mere centimeters from your lips, so close they brush over your own with each and every word.

“We’re making a trip to see Delilah.”

You’re matter-of-fact as you pull away from him, slipping from his loose grasp much to his obvious dismay. He throws his head back with a sigh, sending heaps of blonde hair to flop backwards and out of his eyes momentarily.

“You pinky promised me we’d go today. You can’t go back on those you know,” you remind him firmly, your lips pursed. His face scrunches as he remembers his words from just the night before; he’d much rather stay in bed and kiss you senseless all day long.

“Aren’t we a bit too old for pinky promises?” He asks with a raised brow, amusement weaving around his every word as he sits up fully.

You scoff incredulously at his absurd suggestion. “Draco, we’re only twenty-four. Besides, you’re never too old for pinky promises.”

His gaze falls almost involuntarily to the mark etched permanently on his arm as he drops his head forward at your words, his smile fading and his hair falling back down over his forehead. His stomach churns every time he sees the dark symbol, disgust clouding his mind as he looks at the swirls of black ink taking up space on the pale skin of his forearm. Space he’d never get back, memories of it forever tarnishing his mind. He often wonders how such a vile mark could curl so elegantly as if it weren’t the most humiliating thing to carry on your shoulders in the wizarding world. If he could scrub it off he would do it in a heartbeat; he’s tried.

“Dray?” His view of it is obstructed when your hand slips over his arm, effectively capturing his attention once more. You knew his mind had wandered elsewhere, and you knew just where it’d gone to. “We’d better get there before she sells out of everything. We’re not the only ones that are fond of her baking, you know. Especially on a Sunday morning.”

You finally slip from the bed with a kiss to his cheek and one on his lips, one he inevitably chased for more with a quiet protest as you pulled away from him entirely this time.

“Have you always been this demanding, my love?” He asks with a chuckle, catching the sweater you had tossed at him. You pretend to ponder the question as you tap your finger to your cheek.

“I believe so, yes.”

—

The little bell over the small shop door signals your entrance, drawing a few curious stares before they’ve gone back to their drinks. Immediately the scent of the various pastries sitting in the glass showcase is what hits you first, that and the ever familiar smell of hot chocolate. Your hand slips from Draco’s as you wander to the section in particular you’re looking for, missing the way he smiled after you before he stopped himself from standing there looking like a lovestruck fool.

It seemed as though fate had been on your side that gloomy Sunday morning, two fresh blueberry muffins sitting on their respective tray just waiting for you to buy them up. Delilah had already been on the task of grabbing them without the need to ask, having known your favorites like the back of her hand by now. The two of you had been coming there every day for the past year and a half after all.

“You’re always selling out, aren’t you, lovely?” Draco asks with a smile, putting some money on the counter and extra as a tip. The older woman smiled with a soft laugh, her cheeks staining a soft pink at the nickname falling from his lips.

Your eyes lit up upon seeing her add in an extra chocolate chip muffin too. She did this every time, perhaps it was because the sweet old woman had a bit of a crush on Draco, but nevertheless it still surprised you. She immediately denied your futile attempts to pay for it, as she’s done each and every single time you’ve tried and you purse your lips playfully, easily falling into small talk with her as if it’d been ages since you did.

She told you of her grandson who’d come to help her out with the bakery now that she had been getting older and unable to keep up with orders like she used to. You saw him flittering around the kitchen here and there but there was no sort of proper introduction, and you were quickly pulled to another subject. She had a habit of bouncing around from topic to topic, unable to talk about any one thing for more than a minute or two.

However, Draco had been privy to the boy’s obvious gazing in your direction from behind the counter, a gaze that seemed to be a little too adoring for his girlfriend. Naturally, he fixed him with a raised brow before his eyes narrow at him ever so slightly. Draco wasn’t trying to be overly intimidating per say, but he hadn’t been too fond of the way he’d been looking at you. That was a look reserved for himself to give only, and he planned to take advantage of that as soon as the guy stops making heart eyes at you.

He nearly drops the tray of chocolate chip cookies clutched in his hands when he catches sight of the displeased blonde, cheeks flushing a deep crimson at his blunder. He scratches the back of his neck and rushes back to the kitchen without another glance in your direction. You seem to be blissfully unaware of the subtle and wordless interchange and Draco finds himself slipping his hand back in yours with a soft squeeze because he’d missed the contact. Any bit of jealousy that had been simmering in his chest, no matter how minute, dissolves the moment you look at him.

“Are you ready to go, Love?” You ask, your eyes seemingly sparkling up at him.

He clears his throat and nods, careful not to get too lost in how much he had wanted to grab your face and kiss you in that moment. You both bid Delilah a warm goodbye, Draco stepping ahead to open the door for you, not letting your hand go. The little bell chimes once more as you step outside, the chilly spring air engulfing you once more and sending a shiver up your spine.

“She said her grandson has been working with her, have you seen him?”

“Yeah, I’ve seen him alright,” he mutters grumpily, scoffing more so to himself than to you.

You pretend you didn’t hear his grumbling, instead leaning on your toes and kissing his cheek sweetly. That seemed to bring him around as you watch a smile grace his lips.

You were just a few paces away from the car when you had seen it; a little street-side stand littered with an assortment of colorfully bloomed flowers for sale. Though Draco seemed to be one step ahead of you, his hand slipping from yours to cross the street with a few cautious glances. You smiled after him with a shake of your head, watching him go straight for the roses without hesitation. You eyed him digging around in his pocket for some change, handing it over in exchange for the single and pristine red rose he now had held between his fingers contently as he crosses the street and back to you again.

“Draco!” You say with a soft laugh, quickly captured in a breathless kiss as he gifts you the delicate flower. His breath puffs out in little clouds against the chilly air as he raises a brow.

“You can’t possibly have thought I’d leave without buying you one, can you?”

Your cheeks blush a soft scarlet as you grin up at him, leaning up on your toes to kiss him once more. He was ever the romantic at heart, though he likes to argue and insist that he is absolutely no such thing. However, currently you were desperate to divert his attention from your reddening cheeks.

“We’d better go before it rains on us.”

He hums softly in agreement, getting in the car with the cue of thunder rumbling through the gray sky. The sweet smell of the muffins had begun to seep through the paper bag they resided in, filling the car with the mouthwatering scent of blueberries and a hint of chocolate. You were tempted to delve into them in that very moment, though you quickly decided against it with the short commute. Even with that being said, Draco still enveloped your hand in his own no matter if you were two minutes from home or two hours. It was a sense of grounding that he’d worked into an absentminded habit.

You looked over at him fondly, the softest of smiles tugging at the corners of your mouth as you did so. His sleepy eyes flickered over the familiar town, his free hand draped over the top of the steering wheel. You admired him as you so often do, at the platinum locks tangling with dark lashes because there was no pressing need for it to be pristine any longer; he hadn’t wanted to get a haircut either. At the freckle adorning the very corner of his jaw, one you kissed so often you had lost count by this point. Even at the strands of hair stubbornly sticking out at the back of his head that he hadn’t cared to brush down before he left the house. Perhaps the cutest part was the way he sung ever so softly to the radio that had been on, the same muggle song stuck in his head for days.

He turned his gaze to you briefly when he turned on your street, having felt your stare much like he’d felt it earlier that morning just forty-five minutes prior. You look ahead with a smile and a deepening blush spreading to the tips of your ears, your home coming into view and allowing a reprieve from his playful yet inevitable teasing that was bound to be spoken.

As luck would have it, the patter of rain drizzled onto the windshield in delicate droplets before turning to an undesirable downpour in the span of five seconds. You look to Draco with a knowing smile, the keys clutched readily in his hand as he sighs and gives a nod.

“One…two…three!” You say simultaneously, making quick work of exiting the car and squealing as you did so.

You of course had gotten held up as he fumbled with the latch of the old iron gate because it never functioned when it was needed to, grabbing your hand and rushing down the mossy cobblestone pathway to your front door. You shriek in protest to the icy rain pelting against you, effectively soaking through your coat and warping the bag crinkled in your hand. He’d had a much easier time with the lock on the door, but you found yourself plucking a flower that had caught your eye before he had tugged you into your home and closed out the inclement weather behind you.

Bouts of laughter filled the otherwise quiet space, the familiar scent of pine and coffee wafting your way as the residual heat from the fireplace took the edge off. You stand there with a smile as he shrugs off his rain dampened coat, the gray sweater he wore underneath it doing nothing to help the way you wanted to kiss him.

“What?” He asks, his eyes narrowed curiously as he takes his shoes off.

You bite the inside of your cheek as you thrust the freshly picked hydrangea in his direction, water droplets beaded on its fluffy pink petals. A smile is on his lips as he takes it with a soft blush, pinching the stem between his fingers as he smells it briefly. “It’s only fair that I give you one too, right?”

He responds with a kiss, his hands settling on your cheeks as the dampened flower brushes against your skin lightly. His lips taste of his morning coffee and sugar and his hands were warm despite the cold temperatures, the ends of his hair tickling against your forehead.

He parts after another soft kiss is landed in yours lips, taking the paper bag and rose from your hand and setting them on the small table by the door before helping you out of your jacket and hanging it up with his own. You hadn’t made it more than a few steps into the living room before Draco’s hand tugged on yours, a laugh leaving your lips as he spun you around and pulled you close.

“Draco, I happen to be craving those muffins, you know,” you tease, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“They can wait just a moment,” he says, tucking your dampened hair behind your ear. His eyes bounce over every inch of your face, lingering a moment or two longer on your lips before lifting to meet your curious gaze.

“What are you thinking about?”

He smiles softly with an airy laugh, resting his forehead on yours. A million thoughts had resided in his mind, and all of them revolved around you. The idea scared him, really. The thought of loving someone as wholeheartedly as he did you was a concept he hadn’t quite figured out yet, something he never thought he was capable of, never thought he’d have the chance to do. It was no longer a young love as teens, it is a love that’s become so deeply rooted in his heart, utterly unwavering and all encompassing. He never understood how he’d managed to grab ahold of a love like this, to be loved by someone like you. For you were nothing short of wonderful, you were all the beauty in the world in one person. And he felt as though he’d been unworthy of such affection, he was a Malfoy after all.

Malfoy’s hadn’t been known for acts of kindness and generosity. They were known for spite and selfishness; that thought invaded his mind more often than he’d ever care to admit. It’d been baffling, an idea he has yet to come up with an explanation for as to how he deserved to be loved so dearly, so intensely. He felt he didn’t deserve even a second glance from you, and he feels as though he shouldn’t bask in it too much for fear of it slipping right through his fingers. But he found he couldn’t help himself, not really, he loved you too greatly not to show it in every moment he could.

You were warm, you were impossibly kind, you were more courageous than he could ever be in ten lifetimes. You were his. Or perhaps he should say he was yours.

“I love you,” he whispers, his nose brushing over yours as his lips dip closer to yours. It’s so soft he thinks it might’ve gone unheard against the downpour pelting down outside.

His smile is unable to be contained as your soft laughter puffs against his lips, his eyes fluttering closed.

“Is that so?”

He nods ever so slightly without hesitation, his hum solidifying his answer. Your lips pressed to his softly, his smile disappearing into your kiss as your fingers tangle in platinum strands momentarily. A warmth blossoms in his chest and he feels as though his heart might burst with the way you make him feel, a quiet whine sounding in his throat when your lips pull from his all too soon.

“I love you,” you murmur, your eyes sparkling once more as you look up at him.

His fond smile soon quirks up into a lopsided smirk, extending his pinky between the two of you despite the close proximity. “Pinky promise?”

You raise an amused brow at him, a laugh leaving your lips again. Draco claimed pinky promises were for kids just that morning, a habit started in third year, but you knew for a fact that the seemingly childish action meant more to him than he’d care to admit. Regardless, you raise your pinky and link it with his own, his smile widening as he gazed down at you with a pale pink dusting his cheeks.

“Pinky promise.”

You break away from him with a whisper of a kiss, jovial laughter filling the house as you grab the long awaited bag of muffins and skipped off to the kitchen. He stared after you for a few fleeting moments as he shook his head with a smile.

It wasn’t a temporary love. It was a love to last.

—

Tags: @amourtentiaa @theweasleysredhair @hahee154hq @greenappledraco

#draco malfoy #draco malfoy one shot #draco malfoy fluff #draco malfoy angst #draco malfoy x reader #draco malfoy x you #draco malfoy fic #draco fanfiction #draco malfoy imagine

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smellsfaintlyofvanilla · 3 years

Note

Imma be cheeky and write in twice! so home girl aka me has phat as crushes on half the Aot women. *SPOILER* A scene where reader takes the bullet for Sasha but lives instead of dies? xx

Honestly, I'm still reeling from Sasha's death, I need this :')

Promise

(Sasha Braus x Reader)

AU: Canon, divergent

Warnings: Injury, blood, season 4 spoilers

Category: Mostly fluff, a little angst

Summary: Arriving on the airship, Sasha and her S/O celebrate surviving the attack. While they're distracted, a little miscalculation comes aboard.

Words: 2.6K

A harsh breeze assaulted your face, recklessly blowing locks of hair in random directions as you zipped through the air with your ODM gear.

You gazed on at the destruction below. The city of Libero, Marley, had gone up in flames so unceremoniously mere hours ago. Bodies—civilian and military—were scattered on the streets like tiny shards of glass. The sight was horrid to you, and many others, of course. The destruction reminded you of the attack on Shinganshina all those years ago, and what you had seen that day. It was a wicked cycle, and one that was repeating, much to your sorrow.

It was a deliberate attack by Eren Jaeger, your soldier comrade in the Scouts. Once just a hotheaded idiot dead-set on freeing humanity, now an intimidating, powerful man, determined to put an end to Marley and win everyone's "freedom" back. That is, only, if you count genocide as a means to gain freedom.

It was ludicrous. You could never imagine trampling others' freedom in pursuit of your own. It was inhumane, cruel, but...

That's not what you should be thinking about right now.

Your feet hit the underside of the airship, and you slowly scaled your way towards the open door. A hand was outstretched towards you, and attached to the hand was the sun. Or rather, Sasha Braus.

You took her hand graciously, pulling yourself up with a grunt, steadying yourself in the ship before immediately pulling her into an embrace. She returned the gesture, wrapping her arms around your shoulders and burying herself in your neck.

The moment was only brief, however, since the gazes of other soldiers were ever present, so you pulled away somewhat self-consciously.

"I'm so glad you're alright, Y/n." She sighed, taking your hand and squeezing it, a much more subtle gesture of affection. "God, I was so worried. I heard your squad was in a tough spot, and I tried my hardest to go look for you, but Jean he— he wouldn't let go, and—!"

"Sasha, Sasha, relax. It's alright." You smile, setting a hand on her shoulder, and it wasn't until know that you realized she was shaking. "I get you were worried, but I'm here now. I'm okay, we survived, that's all that matters."

You leaned forward, giving her a quick peck on the cheek that made her cheeks tint adorably pink. "Yeah, guess you're right..."

Suddenly, distant yelling across the ship caught your attention. Connie and Jean, both alive and well on the other side of the ship, were waving to you two, calling you over.

You turned back to smile at her, squeezing her hand in affirmation as the two of you made your way over.

"There you two are." Connie smiled, "I admit, I was a little worried this time. Things got pretty bloody out there."

Suddenly, he threw his arms around you, Sasha, and Jean, pulling you into an impromptu group hug. "I know this isn't fair to the others, but... I'm glad you're all okay. You guys are important to me."

Sasha smiled, putting her hand comfortably onto Connie's arm, holding onto him, whilst Jean groaned uncomfortably, shifting around awkwardly.

"Your gear is too damn clunky." He mumbled, worming his way out of the hug. Connie released his hold on you and Sasha shortly after, giving you a genuine, warm smile before de-equipping the gear from his sides.

You leaned against the wall with a groan, massaging at your temples in an attempt to relieve the tension in your head.

"You okay?" Sasha questioned, joining you on the wall as her body turned to you with concern.

"Yeah... Yeah I'm fine." You sigh, releasing your hand from your forehead. "It's just... I don't know... I'm just not used to seeing all this destruction. Until now, we've been fighting titans—not humans. I don't like all this death and destruction. It's so... unnecessary. I hate it." You state flatly, freely dumping all your worries to the auburn-haired girl. Despite what one might think at first, she was amazing at comforting people, and was always there when something was keeping you awake at night, or nagging at you during a day off.

"Babe, I get what you're feeling." She soothes, grabbing you by the shoulders and pulling you in, gently setting her hand on the back of your head to guide it to your shoulder. You silently complied. "This all is awful. That's no lie. It shouldn't have happened. But it isn't your fault, either." She said, running her fingers through your hair. "The responsibility is all on Eren. He started this, not you. Don't ever feel guilty about this."

You didn't respond verbally, instead tilting your head into her neck, allowing her to comfort you for a little while longer, indulging in the rare moment of vulnerability.

The moment was, once again, short lived, as a loud shout startled you out of your spot in the crook of Sasha's neck.

"It's our time to celebrate! The first battle of the new Eldian empire has ended in victory! We won!" It was the voice of Floch, a soldier you had soon grown to hate over your years of knowing him. Not only for his comments towards Armin, but also his support of the attack. He seemed not to care about the lives of Marleyans, rather caring about the success of prosperity of Paradis, or as he called it, "the New Eldian Empire".

"Ignore him." Sasha spoke to you, understanding how easily he would get under your skin. Soon, she started walking over to where Jean and Connie were standing, talking amongst themselves. You followed her wordlessly, deciding that distracting yourself with conversation would be the best option for now.

"Have you heard anything from Lobov?" You managed to pick up Connie saying, once you were in earshot.

"He should be coming up just about now." Jean responded, and you and Sasha took your places next to the two of them.

Sasha opened her mouth to speak, but immediately froze in her place, mouth slightly agape and eyes widened. She turned back to look at the opened airship door in confusion.

"Did you hear that?" She asked, turning back to the group. You, Connie, and Jean all exchanged confused looks for a minute, before Jean cleared his throat, preparing to speak.

"Hey, everyone, quiet down!" He shouted, attempting to gain control of the rowdy soldiers.

"Celebrate! It's our victory!" Floch raised his fist in the air, prompting everyone else to do the same, the group erupting into shouts and cheers.

"Hey!" Jean yelled louder this time, but to no avail.

You turned back to the airship door, scanning where Sasha had looked at moments prior, checking for any possible threats. You were about to turn back around, but an arm hoisting itself onto the airship caught your attention.

You froze in horror, watching as the soldier—a child soldier—rolled aboard the deck, a furious and determined look on her face as she pointed her rifle right into the crowd. Right at Sasha.

There was no time to think it out, to assess the situation—anything.

Without any hesitation, you lurched forwards to tackle Sasha and protect her from the—

*BANG*

The shot rang out, and even after the sound faded, a ring in your ears persisted, blocking out any and all noise around you.

The bullet shell clinked to the ground, and the soldier gazed on in bewilderment at what she'd done, finding herself shocked and unable to reload.

Jean took a quick glance at you and Sasha, both of you on the ground, blood already spilling onto the ground, and his mind clouded with rage. Without thinking, he drew his pistol from his waistband, drawing it up to his shoulder level and shooting back at the soldier.

Another soldier, also a child, a blonde one this time, climbed aboard right after, tackling the girl to the ground and saving her from the bullet, which ricocheted off of the metal beams of the airship and shot back at Jean, narrowly missing his face.

The other soldiers seemed to have gotten a hold of their senses, as they suddenly let out furious screams, charging towards the two children and relentlessly beating them, anger clouding their thoughts.

Sasha groaned from her position on the floor, dark vision finally materializing. She stirred, looking around and trying to gauge what had just happened, raising her hand to her forehead to try and push some of her hair out of her face. To her horror, though, the hand was wet. It was uncomfortably warm, yet characteristically crimson. Her gaze shifted to you in horror, still having your arms tucked protectively around her, shielding her from harm.

"Y/n!" She shouted, yanking you off of her, not realizing in the heat of the moment that that might hurt you. Your clothes were stained with blood, and you let out an involuntary groan in pain as you started to regain your senses.

"Y/n, come on! Where are you bleeding?! Where... where—?!" She searched frantically, her blood running cold and face paling as her hands grew bloodier and bloodier the more she searched. "Come on...!"

Suddenly, you moved your arm, grabbing Sasha's by the wrist and moving her hand away.

"S... Sash, stop, that hurts..." You mumble through clenched teeth, trying your hardest not to let Sasha realize the extent of your injury. Clearly, though, it wasn't working, as she only looked even more panicked at the thought of accidentally hurting you.

"Y/n... I..." She chocked out, tears starting to cloud her eyes as she desperately looked for something to do, something that could possibly help you in this situation.

"Bandages!" She suddenly shouted, "I need bandages! Somebody!!!"

You wince as your own hand starts to roam your torso, looking for the bullet hole. You let out a quiet sigh of relief when you located it—on your shoulder, close to your collarbone. Despite all the blood, it had thankfully missed any vital organs or major arteries.

"Here... Sasha..." You muttered, causing Sasha's head to snap back to your direction at your words. Your hand was cupped over the wound, as if it would stop the bleeding. Still, it signaled to Sasha where exactly the injury was, and you saw some of the tension lift in her face at the realization that it was a fairly nonfatal location, luckily. She took a deep breath in before speaking.

"Shhh... It's okay Y/n." She finally collected herself, calming herself down just enough to comfort you, just like she always had. "Lay down, take deep breaths, don't panic." She instructed, her hands gently pushing you down by your shoulders, and you did as she said wordlessly, being too tired to mutter any sort of affirmation to her.

Another soldier tossed her the roll of bandages, and she immediately started to unwind it, placing it on the wound and wrapping it around and under your armpit with swift precision and caution so uncharacteristic of her.

"Here, this should stop the bleeding a bit. You'll be okay, you'll be just fine..." She mumbled, though it seemed she was reassuring herself more than she was reassuring you.

You laid there in silence, staring up at the ceiling above you—occasionally grunting or wincing at the waves of pain that shot through you. Though, you somewhat reveled in the feeling of your lover carefully wrapping the bandage around your shoulder, taking great caution not to hurt you in any way.

You lolled your head to the other side, staring curiously at her. She was too focused to notice you at first, her tongue poking out of her mouth in concentration. Her skin was still somewhat pale, and adorned with a thin sheen of sweat, from the sudden panic and stress.

Finally, she finished wrapping up the bandage, cutting it from the roll and throwing it haphazardly to the side. Sighing, she gazed down at you, only now realizing you had been staring. She didn't seem to mind though, only reaching her hand down to cup your cheek, the warmth of your skin being a soothing reminder that you were still here—with her. You leaned into her hand, also enjoying the warmth of her skin.

She brushed the loose strands of hair out of your face, leaning down to plant a warm kiss on your lips, smiling as she pulled away, pressing her forehead to yours. You let out a small chuckle before placing your hand on her neck, pulling her down for another kiss.

Once separated, you slowly sat up, pulling yourself into a sitting position with all of the strength you could muster up.

"Ah, Y/n, try not to move so much..." Sasha mutters, worry dripping carelessly into her tone as her hands find your shoulders, guiding you to sit against the wall.

"I'm alright, it's... not so bad." You turned to smile at her weakly, trying to hide the pain's effect on you. It was in vain, however, as Sasha saw through your act quickly.

"No, you're not. Here—" She moved towards you, hooking her arm under your knees, the other one finding your lower back. Slowly, she stood up, carrying you bridal style. You instinctively curled into her chest like a child, gripping onto her shirt as a way to ground you.

To your dismay, though, she eventually stopped, gently laying you down on an old, stiff mattress. One of the infamous beds of the infirmary.

"C'mon, you need rest." She cooed, fluffing your pillow and lifting your head to place it under you. Carefully, she pushed you to the side, making just enough room for her to squeeze into the bed with you. She tucked the blanket over the two of you, lying on her side and facing you, your back turned to her.

She snaked her arm around your waist, pulling you closer and spooning you as gently as possible, as if you were glass, ready to shatter.

You closed your eyes, already feeling sleep and exhaustion taking over your body, the tension and pain slowly dissolving from your muscles.

The silence didn't last long, though.

"Why did you do that?" She finally spoke. Her voice was weak and shaky, trying her hardest to fight off the tears pricking at the corner of her eyes. "Why did you save me?"

"Why wouldn't I?" You rebutted almost immediately, like it was the simplest question she could've asked you.

"You could've gotten killed..." She whispered, pulling you closer to her, trying to get as much skin to skin contact as possible.

"So?" You shifted, turning your head around to face her, staring her down. A twinge of sadness poked at your heart at the sight of the tears in her eyes. You instinctively moved your hands to wipe them away. "I couldn't imagine a world where I would live without you, knowing I had the option to save you and didn't choose it."

She sniffled again, not fighting the tears that escaped her eyes. "But what would I have done if I lost you? I wouldn't know what to do... I couldn't live with myself if that happened."

"You don't gotta worry about that..." You mumbled, kissing away her tears. "No matter what, I'm not leaving you, and I trust you won't ever leave me. After all," You smiled warmly, causing a shy blush to rise to her cheeks. "We still have to get married after the war, and settle down in the forest with a few kids, just like you always said you dreamed of."

She smiled, a hopeful look sparking in her eyes. "Yeah, guess so."

You turned your head back over, closing you eyes.

"I promise you, I'll never leave you. Remember that."

"Of course," She smiles, leaning into the nape of your neck and inhaling your scent. "Of course I know that. I trust you."

"Love you..."

"Love you too."

This would probably be better if I didn't shoe-horn it in at 12AM but whatever, it's not super bad

#attack on titan #aot #snk #shingeki no kyojin #aot x reader #snk x reader #sasha braus #sasha blouse #sasha x reader #sasha braus x reader #sasha blouse x reader

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