#the thought of demonic infants is just so funny to me
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Answering all three Asks I have about The True Immortal Compliant in "The Monkey King and the Infant" au:
Answering asks from @justweirddino and @kyliecatqueen + an anonymous;
Pretty much yeah; the whole Monkie Gang only start out barely tolerating True Immortal Compliant/TIC/Ruyi. Wukong (+ most characters who know about the incident) thinks he's a scumbag for extorting the Kingdom of Women all those years ago. But DBK really wants to see his little brother again (the bull has been locked up for hundreds of years) and begs for them to be at least polite when he visits.
TIC is like that creepy mega-right-wing uncle that you have to put up with at thanksgiving and/or christmas. Has really harsh, outdated opinions on womens health. Makes dirty jokes at others expense. But since he's a guest, you don't want to be rude and call him out. In general a dinner with him is more painful than the furnace in SWK's opinion.
After its over Shadowpeach are like; "Lets never speak to him again." "Agreed".
Then a couple of years pass and Spicynoodles are expecting their first baby(s). Uncle TIC makes himself known. At first DBK and Red Son believe he's emerged to establish contact with his future grand-niblings. PIF is suspicious; she knows her brother-in-law still has access to that Spring Water, and that TIC has been enjoying his new life of luxury in the Underworld...
Red Son is like the little kid who used to think his uncle was cool, then as he got older realized that a lot of stuff was red-flags. He makes sure not to give MK/Xiaotian any drink provided by TIC.
It comes to a head when TIC invites the whole Spicynoodle fam + grandparents to his palace in the Underworld in the lead up to the Spicynoodle wedding. The volcanic, super-hot Demon Bull Palace in the Underworld.
At dinner there's nothing but wine/baijiu to drink. Luckily most of the fam packed their own supply of water/iced tea for the journey and give that to MK to drink so he isn't dying of thirst. The micro-aggression does not go unnoticed however.
Later on in the night, MK gets out of bed to stretch his legs (babies making a ruckus), only to be summoned by TIC sitting in the drawing room. A platter holding a pitcher of water, two full glasses, and wedges of lemon just sitting there on the table.
TIC: "Why don't you sit with me and drink? I'm so sorry I'd forgotten your... limitation during dinner."
MK: "Um... it's no problem really. I'll sit for a bit. Kids were just keeping me awake is all."
A few moment of awkward convo pass. @justweirddino describes the perfect proceeding scenario. MK is just swirling his glass of water, glaring into it as TIC sits with his own empty glass.
TIC: "You're not drinking."
MK: "You poured the glasses before I came in. I didn't see you pour yours."
TIC: *Pupils dilate a little but tries not to show any emotion*
MK: *pours half the contents of his into TIC's own glass* "It wouldn't be fair to drink mine with yours empty. Drink up!"
TIC: *hand shaking as he takes his glass. hesistates taking a sip.*
MK, still as brightly as before: "The Demon Bull Family has such a rich history! I really can't help looking into it, seeing how I'm gonna be part of the family really soon!"
TIC: *Sweats*
MK: "And of course I love hearing how our families interacted during my dad's pilgrimage. Including a really funny chapter involving the Kingdom of Women."
TIC: *oh shit reaction*
MK, smile turning devious: "You really thought I was that stupid did you?" *lets out the loudest Help!/Danger! chirp he can*
Outside the drawing room: *frantic boss music starts playing and getting closer*
TIC barely makes it out of the room alive.
Fun fact about the Spring Water. Half a bowl/goblet is sufficient to cure a pregnancy. But more than that? According to the old woman in Journey to the West that helped Zhu Bajie and Tripitaka; "Any more will dissolve your insides."
Wukong helpfully provides the above knowledge and proceeds to nearly strangle TIC to death.
It wasn't just a simple "remove future heirs"-plan.
It was also a "remove nephew's spouse"-plan.
Once the group learns that last bit, Red Son has to be held back by multiple family members/bull clones to stop him from delivering his Uncle straight to The 10 Kings themselves.
As you can imagine, this was the final straw for DBK. He can deal with a jerk of a little brother - but for his own flesh and blood to try and murder his future son-in-law and unborn grandbabies? Zero contact immediately. Thank you for dinner, never speak to us again or we will destroy you.
Bonus horror/crime idea of TIC;
Princess Iron Fan is comforting MK as TIC is being dragged away to answer for his crimes. She smells the glass and winces.
PIF: "Urgh. No wonder you noticed it. It smells so bitter. Almost like..."
PIF: *Drops the glass, shattering it on the ground. Hands clutching her mouth as she remembers the times in the far past when she and DBK had tried for children. A servant always bringing her a familiarly-foul smelling tea when the queen became "nauseous/unwell".*
MK, immediately worried: "Yuemu! [mother-in-law] Are you ok?"
PIF: "...I'm going to kill him." *wind teleports out of there*
MK: *is left confused, but understands her anger*
So yeah, when TIC shows up he doesn't escape post-S4 alive.
#the monkey king and the infant#the monkey king and the infant au#spicynoodles being parents#pregnancy tw#spicynoodlesshiping#spicynoodles#qi xiaotian#lmk red son#trans mk#true immortal compliant#immortal ruyi#lmk character ideas#lmk pif#lmk princess iron fan#lmk dbk#lmk demon bull king#lmk demon bull family#attempted murder tw
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Imagine instead of mc coming to the devildom it’s the Mario bros (I’m talking specifically the Mario and Luigi series Mario bros) and nobody understands them (the only way for them to know what they mean is by writing) yet strikes fear into all of them once they start attacking demons like it’s clock work. Just imaging 7 demons trying to handle two short Italian men who are insanely powerful yet look goofy as hell is a chaotic image I need.
(The more I think about it the more I want hcs….please :,( )
Anon my request are closed, but you are lucky that I think this would be funny as fuck also because you said Mario and Luigi series I choose partners in time because them getting beaten up by literal babies is even funnier, anyway hope you like it and it turned out how you wanted to
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Lucifer:
who are these people and why are they holding infants who look eerily similar to the adults holding them?
those are not the exchange student he cho- why are they spewing fire!? and where did they get those hammers from!?!? keep them away from Lord Diavolo!
he can´t even understand what they say it just sound like random voice lines
it took a while for them to even find a way to communicate
but after they found a way… I mean it cleared up some things but it just made more questions
and could they stop attacking Demons this won´t gi- where did they get those coins and why are they jumping into the air and cheering
did they say something about a stat increase????
what is even happening right now…?
Mammon:
he tried to scam them
his train of thought was they have a bunch of coins and don´t understand what he says
but it turns out they mistook him for an enemy and decided to attack
after this Mammon was terrified of them
they somehow managed to be scarier than Lucifer! and THIS says something
but he also tried to get a sample from a fire flower or similar items, he does not learn
but he also managed to befriend the babies because he just gave them candies and was nice to them
it did not take a lot to gain their trust, he also threatened to beat up Demons who wanted to attack them
Leviathan:
those guys look almost like the famous Demon Bros!
he somehow knows what they are saying? I guess that´s what you can learn if you play games for centuries
but sadly after seeing him in his Demon form they mistook him for a koopa
yeah… he was hiding in his room every time they were at the House of Lamentation
he still has to treat his burns…
he still watches them from afar because he thinks their attacks are cool
but he also saw them beat up multiple Demons with some weird spin attacks
Satan:
he was impressed by their strength
at first he thought they were filled with rage considering they immediately attacked and he could use them to attack Lucifer
but no they were just ridiculously strong guys who thought they would attack
not a bad first impression if you ask him
he actually couldn´t care less about them, as long as they leave him alone he will let them life
but he is a bit interested in their attacks and how those infants can fight
he also asked for some of their items because he was interested but it seems like they don´t have any effect on him
disappointing...
Asmodeus:
he doesn´t understand how they came here
but they aren´t interesting enough for him so he doesn´t care about them
he just acts like they don´t exist
the only reason he might show some interest in their existence is if they are immune to his charm
but yeah otherwise no interest in them at all
the only other thing I could think about is him criticizing their clothing style
Beelzebub:
he always wants to eat whatever type of itemes they have
he also tried eating them once and started a fight with Beel, but they actually got beaten up
luckily Lucifer was around and saved them
he did give the babies some snacks but he also tried to see if one of their attacks can be used in cooking
it can not and just made a massive mess
Lucifer was very pissed of at this but he got away with just cleaning up
but he did not learn his lesson and tried again
Belphegor:
listen everybody knows Belphie´s view on humans and they are even worse without Mc existing
we all know what he will try
I mean he will get beaten up and probably hate Humans even more than before
if he even sees them as Human at all
for all he knows they could be aliens but no matter what he will still try to trick them
good for them because it didn´t work
he also got beaten up by the baby bros
because he is definitely the type of person who would fight a child, if he isn´t to tired for it that is
#obey me#obey me!#obey me shall we date#obey me imagines#obey me headcanons#obey me lucifer#lucifer avatar of pride#mammon avatar of greed#obey me mammon#leviathan avatar of envy#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#satan avatar of wrath#obey me asmodeus#asmodeus avatar of lust#beelzebub avatar of gluttony#obey me beelzebub#belphegor avatar of sloth#obey me belphegor#local does requests#obey me brothers
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Just read your fic!!! ❤️💛❤️ here’s a meme ficlet. As a treat.
Meliodas technically earning his title of traitor the same way he technically earned his title of commandment of love is so funny to me
The Demon King: *cursing Meliodas and Elizabeth* this should teach you to defy ME your MAKER your KING and then double down on it when I show you the pointlessness and utter foolishness of your rebellion like some sort of slobbering lap dog
Meliodas, wandering the human kingdoms: *commits treason with an Elizabeth*
DK: wh. What.
Meliodas: *commits treason with an Elizabeth*
DK: no.
Meliodas: *commits an even more elaborate and audacious treason with an Elizabeth*
DK: you cannot keep this up. This coping mechanism of yours is not only straight bonkers but as hopeless as you standing against me
Meliodas: *commits treason by himself* *commits treason* *commits-*
The Demon King: I fucking. If I had made you piety instead would you have still done this. Do I even want to know what is going on in your brain
DK: at least I have one sane son. Zeldris?
Zeldris, who has been technically commiting treason by being his own person since childhood:
DK: ...Zeldris? What do you have there?
Zel: uh...
Gelda: :3
DK: that can be fixed.
DK: wait...
DK: child of mine. Faithful servant. Harbringer of death. what are THOSE
Zel: ... dreams of a peaceful demon realm..?
DK:
DK: ...
Zeldris: it's okay. Don't try to pretend you understand what autonomy and human rights are. We all know you don't. And yes I talked to my people about that.
DK: how dare you. I understand exactly. what I don't understand, is how you're so stupid you think your sleep habits have anything to do with this
Zeldris:
DK: whatever you're going through that's making you...think... I'm sure it's all in your head. Just a little juvenile sickness. A bit more weakness to stamp out. Just explain and I can clear it all up for you.
Zeldris, exasperated: I was having ideas without your explicit permission. Something that norm-
DK: UNDER MY ROOF??? Well, I suppose I should have expected that from someone like you, but why are you disobeying me right now?
Zel: vague passive aggressive guesturing
DK: come now. You won't think your little rebellion could possibly be coming from some rational place in your mind, do you?
Zeldris: no father. We all know treason grows from the ass, not from deliberate choices influenced by past experiences. where the hell did you think Meliodas got his treasonous thoughts from. You, dumbass! FROM LIVING HERE WITH YOU!
Meliodas, actively commiting more treason: sup little bro
Zeldris: traITOR
Zeldris: omg why are you... w h y...Okay it doesn't matter just stay away from me we all know you only care about peace and Elizabeth
Meliodas:
Zeldris: 👀...U...unless...?
Zeldris: hey... COME TO THE DEMON REALM SOMETIME. TO HELP REBUILD THE CASTLE AND THE CITY. Okay bye brother see you later
The DK, watching them from hell: FORGIVENESS?? forgiveness is for chumps literally what are you doing. Treason this is so much treason
Bonus!
- Zeldris and Meliodas, drinking tea in the demon realm -
Meliodas: I like the new throne chairs you picked, very nice
Zeldris: I'm surprised you didn't throw yourself onto them the first time you saw them
Meliodas: that would be disrespectful. Now as for father’s throne I vote we throw it out into the wilderness and make it a tourist trap
Zeldris: a what
Meliodas: for lovers
Zeldris: whut
Meliodas: come on. The symbolism. You know what I'm talking about
Zeldris. Of course but I'm surprised you have the... The energy to conceive of that. What with the infant and all. I figured you would be... Half dead that's why I invited you over here for so long. You look very alive though
Zeldris: also the baby is right there
Tristian, who was of course brought along for the first couple hours of this visit bc yes and also it will be easier for Ellie to pry their son out of his arms this way: :D
Zeldris: aren't you going to like. Tone it down when you're around him
Meliodas: nah
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Hope you enjoyed! Have a great day!
Lmaooooooooooo this is great, I love it. As horrifying as it is to consider the possibility that just being your own person might be considered treason under the Demon King, it does make for some very funny jokes.
Also thanks to this I am actively coming up with possible ideas for a “Five Times Meliodas Committed Treason and One Time He Didn’t,” which is probably going to turn out angstier than the title would suggest.
So far I’ve got:
A Robin Hood-esque situation where Elizabeth Number ?? is the Robin Hood figure and Meliodas is the sidekick supporting her and her band of merry men rogues in her quest to overthrow the king and save the common folk (featuring Meliodas getting captured and almost hung before Elizabeth saves him, both of them getting captured and actually hung, or both)
Literally Just Dishonored (basically: Meliodas as the bodyguard of an empress and her daughter (Elizabeth); empress gets assassinated, her daughter kidnapped, and Meliodas gets accused of treason and thrown in prison. Eventually he escapes and proceeds to rescue little Elizabeth, bring down the people responsible for everything (thus debatably committing actual treason), and restore Elizabeth to the throne. Or she dies again for some reason.
…She’s probably going to die in most of these, isn’t she.
At least there would be cute platonic Melizabeth feat: baby Elizabeth?)
The story of Diarmuid and Grainne but it’s Meliodas and Elizabeth instead (iirc: Diarmuid was one of the greatest of an ancient Irish king’s warriors, but was too beautiful for his own good, as the king’s fiancée, Grainne, fell in love with him. Diarmuid and Grainne run away for the sake of love and go into hiding, pursued by the rest of the king’s warriors. Grainne gets pregnant only for Diarmuid to die protecting her from a wild boar and also because his friend and leader of the king’s warriors refuses to betray his king by helping Diarmuid). I’m not entirely sure this counts as treason, but like. It could. Also not sure how I feel about Elizabeth getting pregnant prior to her curse getting broken. Or how to avoid this ending in a demon-goddess hybrid baby several centuries too early.
OOH WHAT ABOUT PIRATE MELIZABETH! Okay, so Meliodas is a ship captain turned privateer, tasked by the queen of such and such kingdom with fighting off pirates. Meliodas goes after the most famous one of them all, only to discover it’s Elizabeth! He then betrays the kingdom to join her. This probably also ends in both of them getting executed, just for piracy this time.
…Okay, I’ve actually checked the definition of treason now, and I don’t think the Diarmuid and Grainne idea would count as treason, but the other three probably would.
You know what would be really funny? The Sins/Zeldris/both somehow hearing all these stories about ancient traitors, figuring out that they were all Meliodas/Meliodas+Elizabeth, and just going up to him and going “What the fuck”
Anyway if you have any ideas (that you would be willing to let me use) or thoughts on my ideas, please do let me know! This is fun hehe
#im going to be honest: it is highly unusual for me to interact with other people in fandom#much less share ideas and actually talk with them#maybe it’s just bc this fandom is a lot smaller than most of my other hyperfixations#but for some reason im a lot more comfortable here#oooooorrrrr possibly i just found the right people :3#certainly i don’t normally find people so willing to come into my inbox and give me meme ficlets ^.^#you’re a lovely person i hope you know that#marijn talks#meliodas#zeldris#elizabeth sds#elizabeth nnt#melizabeth#seven deadly sins#nanatsu no taizai#sds#nnt#hihopelessromantics#long post#marijn answers
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I saw all the discussion of Jolyne and Bruno about how fandom demonize fans who see them as the mother figures of their respective parts, I wanted to see your thoughts on it:)
Sorry anon for being late, lmao I didn't see it😭
Ok here we go.
Warning: Long text, also probably can touch a nerve lol.
In Bruno's case I can see why the fandom has him on this motherly pedestal, wich is understable I suppose(don't fully agree tho). Specially since most of the Vento Aureo cast were neglected in some way as children, Being that Bruno was a comfort and protection that they didn't have. The reason why many perceive him fulfilling the maternal role more than a paternal one, comes more in my opinion from a collective frustration of the spectator, where the case of Giorno stands out more with his mother's absence, then Trish's and Narancia's mothers dying and Fugo's parents giving 0 fucks about him.
As much as people despites Giorno as a protagonist, in my opinion it is undeniable that we empathize at least a little with his lack of mother figure, a resource in Jojo's that reflects the honor of the protagonists; For example, in Jonathan's case, even though he never met his mother we know this woman was brave and strong to die protecting his baby, she cared.
Culturally the idealization of the mother has always been present, the media isn't an exception, if I remember correctly Araki himself makes references to the Virgin Mary with many of his characters that fit into this archetype of something sacred, wich in all the cases, except for Giorno, Yasuho and Josefumi, all the mother's from Jojo are just like Mary. The mother who encourages the protagonist in some way to be good and a hero. So, returning to my Bruno's point, to see a protagonist with this lack of principle of humanity, must of the fandom seek it in Bruno as the figure who encourages him to become a hero and a good person (wich personally sucks and clearly ppl didn't understood Giorno's character).
In my case, I don't entirely dislike this perception because in part I empathize and I would have liked Giorno to find relief and shelter in Bucciarati, also some fanarts, I see and I find funny. However it is up to there, really Bucciarati only fulfills his role as a capo; yes, he cares about people, but if his position had been switched with Giorno, we wouldn't associate this power dynamic legitimately as of the mother figure.
And now, unlike Jolyne(wich I'll make my point soon) even though he is 20, he is far from having that youthful mentality, he simply lives in a context where he had to mature too much, for me it was a shock to know that he was 20 years old, because I bet that at least he would be 30. That said, if there are people who argue that Bucciarati couldn't be the adoptive mother of 5 teenagers because he is 20 years old, I think it is not feasible because this man is not 20 years old mentally. I couldn't even say he was a 12-year-old mentally boy when his father's situation happened. Bruno was a very wounded person who had to mature immediately because of the circumstances.
Now with Jolyne... Please don't hate me 😩 but no, I don't see her as a mom. And don't get me wrong, I appreciate the Jojo moms already, it would be great if some day we have for a Shonen a female protagonist that is a mom. Just look at the potential :3
But with Jolyne, is just not the case, I just don't see her like that.
Let's start because the reason they only associate it with the maternal side is because of Emporio, because he is an infant.
Since the first time she gets a stand we see her protecting others, caring for them, even for a stranger like Ermes.
When, elsewhere we see the protagonists caring and interacting with children to highlight their kindness and people never point them out and say "Oh yes, they're definitely going to adopt them and be their parents." Is like???
Whoever doesn't want to see sexism in that is blind or should question themselves a bit more. And yes, people demonize maternity and motherhood, except that is more of a problem in Western than in Asian countries, most of the complains about the supposed demonization that some of us see with Jolyne being associated as a mother, are people who believe that everything revolves around the United States femenism standards.
Japanese society is incredibly sexist and the reflection of this is also seen in their media, being that the only archetypes that the authors of Shonen and seinen use for female characters is divided between: the love interest that drives the male character, the mother of the protagonist who dies tragically mind to also boost the male protagonist or a female character who is good but only as a background character. The idealization of motherhood is extremely sexist, which although in Western society has already been very sullied and demonized,people have to understand that in Japan they are still stuck in the first problem, where women are not recognized as a being with a voice or vote, but as the idealized woman who must be sanctified based on her ability to bring children into the world.
Again, we already have mothers in Jojos, who are incredible in that role and lovely characters. That said, the fact that Jolyne is one of the first female characters of Shonen as well as a protagonist, without depending on a man or whose story ends in a happy weddign or pregnancy, makes her extremely important and human. Even in some western media we have seen this resource where the female who kick asses by herself, ends up being a mother and housewive as a form of redemption (see Penny from the big bang theory or Katara from Avatar).
Edit: I was educated about the book of Hunger Games and how Katniss actually expresses her wishes about having a family before becoming the hero, so she doesn't fit into this archetype
Jolyne doesn't and it's so magical to me that aspect.
Now let's talk about why for me, Jolyne doesn't fit into this archetype, starting with the fact that here her age is relevant. Even though we see Jolyne's growth and maturity, she's still a 19-year-old girl who does stupid things despite the circumstances and makes crucial mistakes that do jeopardize Emporio's integrity, like letting him drive a car and a helicopter, even entrusted him with many crucial tasks. and okay, Emporio is capable of realizing them, but he is a child, and it's a principle that anyone with a minimum sense of responsibility would'nt allow him to or would take him to a safe place after escaping from prison because he is a kid!
Jolyne grow up semi normally we could say, if we don't take into account Jotaro's absence but compared to Bruno's situation, she has a 19 years old mentality.
Bruno Bucciarati knows this, and did protect Narancia and Trish, even though they're stand users. Also Jotaro did with Koichi.
For the record, of course teen moms exist, I myself work with some, since I do social service in kindergarten, let me tell you that it is a very difficult and complex task, I admire very much the mothers who strive to raise them and their children and don't neglect them or mistreat them (bc also teen and neglectful mothers exist, wich I'm not to judge their cases, I'm just concerned about the children, it brokes my heart to see them grow up without affection💔)
But again, it has nothing to do with Jolyne's character, lol. Like seriously the story of her is about developing, forgiveness and healing generational trauma, about justice and letting go of these burdens of fate to pursue our own and others happiness. Emporio already had a mom and Jolyne is not replacing that place.
This is genuinely as annoying as the one trait ppl give to Jolyne as a horny teenager.
But if you see their dynamic as this and you find solece like Giorno's and Bruno's case, it's okay and it's acceptable, as long, yeah you don't get mad when ppl says otherwise, bc it's annoying in Bruno's case when ppl don't accept the perspective about Bruno not being the mother of the gang, I don't want the same for Jolyne😩.
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lay it on me bro: the devil’s inside (you opened the door, you gave him a ride)
((for reference it’s the opening line of “my eyes” by the lumineers))
you are so. we are so 🤝
send me a fic title and i'll think up a fic!
what's funny abt this title is that it goes a lot with what jac just posted. @we-are-inevitable and @roideny were talking about for... a while in the discord its this
anyway this is going to be like an au of the bfu au but also thats irrelevant.
essentially, jack is having the worst possible go at life. he's just been fired, his girlfriend dumped him a week before, rent is due soon, and his roommate is depending on him. everything is coming to a head all at once, and during the typical 3am panic attack in his room, jack swears something... answers him?
hey, do you need some help?
there is no one in his room, he thinks. he thinks, until a shadow shifts in his vision, toward him, and a face resides in it. not a clear one, mostly white shapes within the black expanse in front of him. rather round, friendly eye shapes for a creature of darkness.
"um," jack stutters out, "like, i'm having a panic attack, and seeing things–"
oh that's horrible! the wide eyes and shapeless form... says? jack can hear it- him, he has... a really sweet, soft voice actually. you aren't seeing things, though. i'm here. i'm here to help, just reach your hand out.
fuck it, it couldn't hurt, so jack's shaky hand reaches out. and it disappears from view? he thinks, at least, until something holds it and the waves of panic raging through his body simply lapse against the shore. his breathing evens, his head levels out. he's calm.
"cool..." jack breathes out. "thank you? thank you. it did help, um, can... i have my hand back?"
can i have your name?
"jack."
no, your name.
"it's jack, dude- thing..guy."
it's not. can i have it?
"it is, man fuck off–"
the calm is ripped away, the panic sets his heart in motion too suddenly, and his lungs can't take in air.
"fuck, fuck, it's cisco," he gasps out. "oh my god, it's cisco. stop."
and he does stop, and the shadow smiles, and jack can see his hand again because the shadow isn't holding it anymore.
thank you, jack, he says, and the shadow looks friendly again. i'll see you later! i'm happy i could help.
"what the fuck," jack breathes out. "what even is this? are you?"
oh, i'm davey. look, i have to go, but i'll be back later, so no need to miss me too much.
and then it- he's gone, and jack is left calm in his room at 3:15 in the morning.
basically jack's energies are so, so shit that they attract david, a demon, and jack gives davey his name, so basically davey is going to have a very very fun time with his personal little human and protect him from time to time. so instead of getting sent a guardian angel, jack gets sent a demon literally because his energies are so sick and twisted to the point where davey is like. someone must have literally cursed you as an infant, the occult must have gotten a hold of you, because your spiritual levels are so, so awful.
but also i think he can have dangerous magical connections as a treat
jack being a magical mystery is a concept i have thought about a lot, and idk if this is rly how i'd end up doing it, but i think it'd be kind of funny. like if jack was abt to be hit by a car davey's voice would go OH MY GOD WATCH OUT and possess jack, move him out of harm's way in time, and release him.
#any speaking of magical mysteries kath that reminds me of ur magic au huh wow wonder if thats doin alright ♥️#i could probably bang out a few scenes of this if i rly tried tbh. not a very linear story#thank u for the very in character ask LMAOO#mutuals#fizz wants to write#fizz answers#jack kelly#davey jacobs#newsies#newsies aus
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Don't you think it's funny cause actual canon gay characters in BL manga/manhwa will say "I love you" but only the shounen bromance can spew out some of the most romantic shit akin to a 19th century poet writing a letter expressing his surpressed love for his lover 😭.....
Hi anon~
It is indeed interesting how a lot of bromances tend to get so much intensity. They get very homo in their no homo xD
There's many reasons for that actually! For example, if we take wuxia dramas, in a lot of occasions they were gay in the source material. In kdramas, they have lately been going stronger at the bromances and playing with misunderstandings and other characters being like "oh I thought you guys were together", in a very queerbaity way (probably for the female audience) because they know it's popular and it will create buzz and hype.
But if we're talking shounen manga, most of the bromances there are so intense because of the layers of complexity their relationship has. Why was SasuNaru so popular? Because what better than having two people, both terribly lonely having finally found a friendship that is taking them out of that place only for it to break in the most tragic manner (one choosing the wrong path because of his inner demons and the other trying to stop him) in which their emotions are literally represented by a physical fight? And we generally do not see that happen with female characters, only between the male characters (I blame misoginy).
I do wish there was more of that intensity we see in bromances in BL. Or actually, I wish some of those bromances became romances, when it makes sense. But apparently markets are not ready for that 🤷♀️
However, my favorite romantically poetic line that I've ever seen comes from a movie:
You're a child. An infant. Your mocking is thus infantile. He's not my boyfriend. This man is more to me than you can dream. He's the moon when I'm lost in darkness and warmth when I shiver in cold. And his kiss still thrills me, even after a millennia. His heart overflows with the kindness of which this world is not worth of. I love this man beyond measure and reason. He's not my boyfriend. He's all and he's more.
This is from The Old Guard, a Netflix movie. If you haven't seen it, go watch it. It'll be worth it~~
I am sure there is more like this out there in BL or Queer media, we just gotta look hard for it ;)
#anon ask#i ended up writing a lot#snow rambles#but it is a very interesting topic#bromances are food for thought
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Daddy's Got You (Alec Lightwood)
Alec's POV:
I stood in the control room, papers and books strewn before me as I pointed out different things to various people. Sometimes these people could be so incompetent. When the last person had scuttled off I thought I finally had time to finish my work. Man was I wrong. My attention was drawn away from my work by a piercing wail followed by a string of muffled curses. A second later Jace came hurrying into the room, panic evident on his face as he haphazardly cradled a baby in his arms. My baby to be exact.
"Jace, what the hell did you do?" I asked as I hurried to meet him and save my daughter from his dangerously unprepared arms. "I was just trying to make her smile with some funny faces, and it was working for a little while, but then I made a face that I guess she thought was scary and turned into a banshee," he rushed out. I stared at him incredulously for a moment before I asked, "And how exactly did you get a hold of her? I told Izzy to watch her." Jace scratched the back of his neck nervously as he replied, "See the thing is that Simon did something stupid and Izzy had to go help, so she thrust your little demon spawn on me and said she'd be back in no time. She also said not to be seen by you."
I mentally facepalmed myself as I growled out, "Clearly I can't trust any of you with my child." Jace threw up his hands in self-defense and backed out of the room. I turned my attention back to the crying infant in my arms and moved her so she was supported against my chest. I began to bounce a little and rub her back as I said, "Shh, shh, shh. It's okay, Ramona, daddy's got you," in a soothing tone. Eventually she calmed down and I felt her little face burrowing into my chest as her tiny fingers held my shirt. She looked up at me for a moment, yawning, and I saw her blue eyes, the same ones her mom has.
Y/n's POV:
I hurried down the hallway to the control room. I had just run into Izzy, who breathlessly told me the whole story of what happened with Simon, Jace, and my daughter. I knew Alec could not be happy right now. He was so protective over Ramona and only trusted two people to watch her. As I rounded the corner, I stopped short at the sight before me. Alec was standing in the middle of the room, giving orders over the baby's head while cradling her in his arms and being extremely gentle. My heart couldn't handle how adorable this was.
I made my way over to Alec and gently rested my hand on his shoulder so as not to scare him. When he saw me, his expression softened and he smiled softly. "Hey you, how's it going in here?" I asked as I let my other hand rest on Ramona's little back. "It's going good, though Jace practically throwing my child around like a roller coaster was not the highlight of my day." I laughed at his response as I met his gaze. With no words needed, he carefully drew Ramona's fingers from his shirt and transferred her into my arms. I stayed still for a minute as she readjusted and then she went back to sleep. I looked up to see Alec's eyes full of pure adoration. That is, until he turned his attention to someone behind me. I turned to see Jace walking towards us and Alec moved a little closer to me. "Hey guys, are we having a nice little family get together here?" I felt Alec bristle behind me and I rolled my eyes internally. "What do you want know?" I heard him ask. "Woah there, no need for the aggression.""Oh yeah, sure, like you didn't just try to drop my baby," Alec sarcastically replied. "But I didn't." Jace ventured.
Alec silently glared at him as I sighed and said, "Maybe from now on you can just watch when someone else is with you.""Sounds good to me, your little one has quite the lungs." I chuckled quietly as Jace smiled before his eyes shot up to Alec quickly. "How long do you think he'll be mad?" He asked, not taking his eyes off of my husband. "You'll probably be fine tomorrow.""Perfect," he declared before he hurried off. I turned around to face Alec as he said, "I'm so whipping his ass during training tomorrow.""Of course you will," I said, my hand going out to run his arm before returning back to resting on Ramona's back. He sighed but he couldn't help the smile on his face as he leaned down to kiss me. "Well Mrs. Lightwood, what do you say to an early end to work and a nap?""Well Mr. Lightwood, I'd have to say that that sounds wonderful to me." Alec chuckled as he put his hand on the small of my back and led me to our rooms.
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to begin: im sorry for kinning edelgard and im sorry about your wrist
“What about micaiah” Ive thought about her and i didnt know what to say about sothe so i just didnt. my mind immediately jumps to sothe being in middle school and then i lose my shit and stop thinking about micaiah. they are the same age? But ….. the vibes…..? Maybe theyre just sou//wen (From irl lore)
What i did establish is that micaiah is also in the group home with stefan and soren its like a literal final fantasy house in there. micaiah gets limited contact with them because Girl (foster care 1984) but generally stefan is fond of her and soren tolerates her more than in canon because he grew up with her and shes not lighting his troops on fire. She still gets on his nerves because she’ll just start psychoanalyzing him out of nowhere and he hates that but its kind of a greil mercenaries type environment for him where this is kind of his family but its Not ike
branded group homes are pretty common because either youre bigoted against the branded or you dont want the load of trauma that comes from fostering/adopting a branded child. Most adopted branded were charity case infants from countries where theyre especially marginalized (please save the branded children from gallia. THere is nothing loaded about our perception of laguz countrys persecution of minority groups and lack of insight into our own). the yank branded children in the states of crimea are kind of ickier and get adopted less. foreign or not once they hit age 6 in the system they are demon children no one wants to adopt. Notably a good chunk of the branded population is foreign born because of this + asylum seekers. Even if they get adopted 7 times out of 10 its kind of a fail adoption story (maybe beorc savior complex religious people adopting foreign branded children dont always have the best interests of the child in mind and are prone to fostering superstitious beliefs about the children they adopted). ps Soren and micaiah were taken from daein and cant run for president now :(. soren was an infant but micaiah is proudly a daeinite (yet another reason for people not to trust her)
Yes they were all in iep connections together where micaiah a couple of times per year off her meds would poke sorens legs with sharp scissors. Otherwise she was usually chill
also...... post the rest of the videos in the pictures channel?
my wrist does that its ok . and dont be sorry about that. Im glad you kin a woman i think thats progressive #girlboss #vriska
did she make soren bleed with the sharp scissors or was she just being a little silly. either way soren probably wants her dead for that. i like that in this au he gets to grow up around other branded people i dont think it made him more normal or anything but its something. The three of them are like the branded crew and thats their social niche it actually sounds like hell on earth
i think sothe being just younger enough than her that (if? when?) they start dating everyones like Um.... but cant say anything is really funny. but also. micaiah voice Sothe give me your hand... theyre so much bigger than they used to be(they are the Same age). is also funny. either way they are insane. sou//wen from irl lore indeed. sothe leaves for a week to go on a vacation with his parents and micaiah cries
i dont have anything to add to your detailed worldbuilding regarding the displacement of foreign branded children in crimea due to anti branded sentiment and then being seen as charity cases that beorc parents take in to feed their savior complexes until they get old enough its impossible to forget that they are people and then they live in group homes until adulthood. Yeah. Thats deep thank you
also i just did i made a google drive with all of the videos bexause i dont remember which ones i posted lo l
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bad behavior | jjk | m
This is in the same universe as “bad influence.” It can, however, be read as a stand-alone.
— summary; in which staying late to volunteer at a self-help meeting was the best decision you made in a while.
— contents and warnings; smut, the endless adventures of badboy!jk x goodgirl!reader, public sex (in a church…), dirty talk, fingering, degradation (name calling) but also praise, unprotected sex, clothed sex, creampie, cum play, there is a window and also reflections, rough sex, cockwarming, jk being a lil shit because that’s his main personality trait, jk smokes (only mentioned), enemies to fuckbuddies: dawn of the first day
— words; 8.2k
— author’s note; for the anon that asked how their first time was like ;) join me as we explore the lore of this godforsaken couple
It was your mother’s idea for you to find a new place to volunteer. According to her, it had been a long time since you experienced “the invigorating energy of community work” — last time was when you were trying to level up your college application — and it could really “soothe your anxious soul” during the trying times of college finals. Apparently one tutoring program and two research projects weren’t enough to distract you, but you could see where she was coming from.
In the end, you accepted. The old places you used to volunteer in had either shut off their programs or were just too far away from college for you to consider. At first, you decided to follow your mother’s suggestion and tried to work with children — “small miracles”, as she called them — in a local daycare. Which ended up being a terrible idea.
You liked giving back to the community, you really did, but it wasn’t long until you realized that working with infants hasn’t been your wisest decision, and that children weren’t miracles at all. You got tired of going home covered in paint and with pieces of playdough entangled in your hair, and that was when you weren’t unlucky enough to get hit with other, less clean fluids.
So you eventually gave up — both on the daycare and on the faint idea of one day going into pediatrics — and searched for a new place. After having to yell your way through retirement homes, and getting fed up with washing people’s sidewalks, you finally settled in a program that was flexible and light enough for your intense college hours: preparing (and then later cleaning up) a room that was reserved in a local church for weekly meetings.
The entire ordeal took about two to three hours off your day, and more than half of it was spent as free time: waiting for the meeting to end, cramming piles of information in a small room next door. You didn’t really know what the meetings were about since they changed practically every month — they were, at first, a support group for teenage mothers, then it became an AA meeting, then a group for drug users trying to quit. Lately, you were starting to think that the church just gave away the room for whoever had the money to rent it, so it wasn’t a surprise when it was reserved for a motivational speaker to give confidence lessons.
You had researched the guy, some old dude with an unpronounceable name and a sketchy background, and found exactly the type of person you had expected. Yes, you were in the house of Christ, but you were still being heavily judgmental of the fact that he was giving those talks when he had no qualifications whatsoever, and was probably making bank off all the self-help books he regurgitated at least twice a year to prey on vulnerable people. You did share your worries with the administrative office of the church, but they ultimately fell on deaf ears, and you gave up on the idea of kicking his ass out of the holy grounds anytime soon.
It was after one of those pseudo-motivational talks that you walked into the empty room, ready to clean everything up before rushing back to your place, where your roommate had promised to greet you with some wonderful takeout. The chairs were still placed in a circle on the center of the room, where they had been since forever, and you made sure to align them perfectly before you moved on to the litter that had been thrown around the place.
One good thing about those self-help meetings was that they were a lot cleaner than a lot of other attendees, so the “picking up the trash until your back started to hurt” part passed by surprisingly fast. You had just moved on to the snack table, analyzing what you could still save, when your soul almost left your body.
“Hey, you,” you heard a known voice behind you. “What are you doing in here?”
You swiftly turned around, heart thumping violently against your ribcage. You didn’t know how you hadn’t let out the biggest, most blood-curdling scream ever, but that was just the first of many miracles of the night. “Jesus Christ,” you wheezed out, taking one hand to your chest. “You shouldn’t sneak up on people like this.” You swallowed dry, some part of your brain recalling that he had asked you a question. “And I’m volunteering here.”
“I didn’t sneak up on you, you’re just jumpy.” Jungkook scoffed, leaning against the doorframe with that stupid playful smirk curling up on his lips. You didn’t know they allowed demons inside the church. “And of course you are.” He rolled his eyes.
Maybe a few months back, his mocking tone would’ve stung a bit more. However, you had been tutoring Jungkook for about three months then, suffering through endless sessions of his whining and complaining, and you’ve grown used to his passive-aggressive antics already. You learned that Jungkook was a shark seeking for blood, waiting for any crack that would allow him to jump into a perverse little joke — about how you behaved, your priorities, or even the color of your highlighter. You, of course, always stood your ground and threw his comments right back at him — which was his initial plan, as you’ve come to realize. Jungkook enjoyed playfully arguing with you, and you thought that it was another level of strangeness and masochism you simply didn’t have time to dissect.
Still, Jungkook (shockingly) wasn’t the terrible person you once thought he was. Every once in a while — when he was trying to talk you out of teaching him — the conversations you two would have were actually mostly pleasant, and he wasn’t awful to hang around when he dropped the whole badass persona to act like a real human being. You would even dare to say that Jungkook could be actually funny at times, and not in the bitter, sarcastic way he usually was. Sometimes, you dared to think, he could actually be reasonably nice. And also kind of cute. Even hot.
But you would never actually admit any of that out loud. Or even to yourself, really.
“And you?” You asked, turning back around to face the table full of half-eaten food. That looked like a battlefield, and you could already tell that there were only a few survivors left standing. “What are you doing here? Repenting?”
Jungkook chuckled dryly. “You wish. My parents want me to quit smoking,” he said. You could not see him, but you could hear him walking closer to you as you fumbled with the large Tupperware. “We settled on this crap instead of a forced intervention.”
You scoffed. Most of the food before you was unsalvageable — some of the cupcakes had been bitten once and then placed back, and you wondered how someone like that could function in society. “You don’t seem very motivated to quit,” you mumbled.
Jungkook clicked his tongue. “I don’t really care.”
His voice was much closer to you, and you felt the air leaving your lungs for a pitiful instant. You convinced yourself you had only gotten scared again. “You should care about the growing possibility of lung cancer.”
He shrugged. “Maybe. But it’s not really on the top of my list of priorities at the moment.”
“And what is?” You asked.
“Amongst other things…” he trailed off and, suddenly, he was standing besides you, pointing at the chaotic pile of sweets. “I actually came back to grab another one of those cupcakes. The chocolate ones are great.”
You didn’t know why, but his comment broke the odd tension that you didn’t even know that was there, clicking you back into your previous mentality — the one that you just wanted to finish cleaning up so you could leave soon. “All yours,” you told him, “grab as many as you want.”
Jungkook hummed in satisfaction, reaching out to grab one special brown cupcake — an untouched one, thankfully. “I love when you talk dirty.” He almost moaned before shoving the cupcake inside his mouth, taking a huge bite off it. Dramatically, Jungkook rolled his eyes and sighed in delight. “These are fucking great.”
You chuckled, glancing at his direction. Jungkook was dressed in all black, like he usually was, and you were starting to recognize a newfound admiration towards his constant use of leather jackets. What? He looked good. “I’m glad the self-help sessions are paying off,” you commented, swiftly placing the cupcakes inside the transparent container.
Jungkook was paying attention to your actions now, like he noticed you were there working for the first time. “What are you doing with the rest?”
“The church will probably donate it, give it to the homeless or something.” You shrugged. “Or they’ll eat it, I don’t know. I just clean up the place and leave.”
Jungkook laughed at that, taking another monstrous bite from his cupcake and throwing himself on one of the nearby chairs. Your eye twitched a little at the thought that he had ruined your perfect circle, but you’d have to fix that on your way out. “Sounds absurdly boring,” he sang. “And they’re not even paying you.”
You sighed. “After all the places I’ve volunteered in, boring is a blessing,” you told him. You had just placed five hot dogs in the container, and you were starting to wonder if it would be a good idea to feed people in need with those suspicious sausages. “But, yeah, you probably don’t care about any of that.”
“You don’t know what I care about,” Jungkook said matter-of-factly. You didn’t know if he was trying to tease you, but his voice came out so soft and monotone that you couldn’t really be mad about it. It was true, after all: you didn’t actually know what he cared about. Sometimes you thought that he could read you better than you could read him. “Want me to stay here with you? This place is probably empty already.”
You could not hold back your laugh at that, turning around so you could look at him. “Are you offering to be my bodyguard? In a church?”
Jungkook pouted. There was a thin line of chocolate on the side of his lips, which he quickly licked clean. “I’m trying to be nice.”
You giggled, turning back towards the disgusting food. The rest was mostly trash, but you were happy enough with the amount you had managed to find in a good state. “That’s new.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” He asked. “I’m always nice.”
“Always is a strong word.” You smiled, closing the lid of the Tupperware. You had managed to fill three small containers with the leftovers and, honestly, that was a big victory. “But you can stay or you can leave, I don’t mind. I’m almost done anyways.”
He frowned. “Is that your answer?”
You turned around. “What? You want me to beg for your company?” You smiled. “You’re mistaken if you think I’d ever do that.”
“I’m staying.” Jungkook crumpled up the piece of cupcake wrapping and threw it in the trash can besides your body. He watched you for a moment as you started to throw the leftovers away, your back turned to him and a distracted look on your face. When he broke the silence again, you were throwing the last piece of bread in the bin. “Why are you volunteering?”
“Because I like giving back to the community.”
Jungkook sneered at your words. “Seriously now. Don’t lie, we’re in a church.”
“I do, actually,” you stood your ground. There was a vague sound of crickets coming from the half-open window and the low buzzing of the fluorescent lights above you, but, other than that, the city was covered in absolute silence. Perhaps that was why you felt so at peace. “But my mom told me it would be a good thing to keep myself relaxed. You know, take my mind off college stuff.”
He hummed, and you heard him getting up from the chair. “You always do what your mom tells you?”
You met his gaze. “Didn’t your parents make you come here?”
He smiled. “Not the point.”
Before you could hold yourself back, your lips were curling up. Again: Jungkook wasn’t absolutely awful to be around when he actually acted like a human being. “When she says something I agree with, yes,” you told him. “My ego isn’t bruised when it comes to following someone’s idea.”
He raised his eyebrows. “You’re saying that mine is?”
“I didn’t say that.” You smirked and turned back to the table. You started piling up the used plastic cups, already eyeing all the used plates, forks and knives that you’d have to throw away. The daycare had better eating manners than that. “Thought we were talking about me.”
“We were,” Jungkook agreed. One of his inked hands moved to the table, and you were about to tell him that he could eat more of the cupcakes when you realized that he had started to reach for the discardable plates, throwing them away. You really didn’t think he’d help you. “Finals are coming up, though, and you care about that shit. Shouldn’t you be using this time to study or something?”
“I study while you’re out here listening to becoming your real self or, I don’t know... waking up the giant within,” you said. “I’m fine, don’t worry about it.”
He hummed, his nose cringing up at the disgusting remains of food that stuck to the plastic forks. Jungkook seriously didn’t know how you could do that for fun. “You know there are better ways to relax than cleaning up a dusty room, right?”
“Probably,” you agreed. The cups were already in the trash, alongside with the plates, and there were only a few crumpled up napkins to get rid of before you tasted the sweet nectar of freedom. “But here I am. That’s what I chose for myself.”
“Literally any other option would’ve been better,” Jungkook pressed on. “Isn’t that obnoxious friend of yours in cheer or something?”
“Who? Jisoo?” You smiled at him. No one had ever called her obnoxious, but you couldn’t say that the title didn’t fit. Jisoo could be really… intense when it came to standing up for what she believed in. “She is. She invited me to join her already, if that’s what you’re gonna ask, but it’s not really my thing.”
“It’s a shame,” he mumbled, leaning against the table. It was a beautiful miracle how clean that room had become just by getting rid of the piles of gross food, and you had proudly thrown the last piece of paper inside the trash bin when Jungkook spoke up again. “You’d look really hot in that outfit.”
You stopped in your tracks, taking a second to digest the claim he had so mindlessly thrown your way. Just like all-things-Jungkook, a pleasant conversation could not last long, so you weren’t even surprised that he managed to ruin that talk with such a fuckboy-esque comment.
Also like all-things-Jungkook, he managed to awaken a reaction out of you that you didn’t even know could be there. With a faint heat in your cheeks and a frown blossoming amongst your features, you actually felt a little bit of... satisfaction with the fact that he thought that you’d look hot in that skimpy outfit. At the same time, you wanted to slap yourself for falling into his charms so easily.
In that conflicting turmoil of emotions, all you could say was a monotone, “You cannot be serious right now.”
Even if you kind of wanted him to be serious.
“I’m being dead serious,” Jungkook didn’t back down, much to the elation of your ego. You felt like a schoolgirl being recognized by her crush, and the idea alone made your stomach curl onto itself. What the hell were you even thinking about? Yeah, Jungkook was pretty hot, but he was also kind of a douche and you didn’t want to get involved with that mess of a person. Or at least that was what you were trying to convince yourself of. “I mean…” he continued, “you’re even rocking this knee-level dress right now, can’t even imagine how you’d look if—“
“You can shut up now, Jungkook, thanks,” you interrupted him. Because you didn’t know how to act when he was so blatantly flirting with you, you switched back to the same passive-aggressive behavior that you had given him for the past three months. Call it self-preservation, call it panic, but your mind simply didn’t know where to go from there. “And I’m also done here, so you can skidaddle back to whatever swamp you came out of.”
“Awn, don’t be mean, princess.” He pouted. Jungkook was a master at getting you worked up, and you had just given that to him on a silver platter. Maybe if you had mock-flirted back, he would’ve baked away. You would never know. “I was just fucking with you, you’re too easy to tease.”
You pressed your lips together, hip touching the corner of the now empty table. “You were pretty much harassing me,” you said playfully.
“I was not.” Jungkook smirked, shoving his hands inside the pockets of his pants. When had the two of you gotten so close? There was barely any space between your chests. “But it’s okay, I’m not gonna compliment you anymore, don’t worry. You don’t have to be so defensive.”
“I’m not being defensive,” you said, defensive.
“What, is it the church setting?” He raised his eyebrows, taking a look around. “Is it making you uncomfortable?”
“No,” you answered, crossing your arms before your chest. Jungkook followed the movement and his gaze got stuck on the shape of your breasts for a second too long, making a newfound wave of heat rise up to your cheeks. “Not as much as you’re trying to make me uncomfortable right now.”
He chuckled. “You do look cute when you’re shy,” Jungkook teased, taking a step towards you, and you took another one back, pretending you were just going to lean against the table. You sat on it in a weird diagonal position, with one leg still on the ground and the other dangling over the edge. Jungkook was so close that, when he spoke again, voice just above a whisper, you could feel his breath on your skin. “If you don’t want me here, just ask me to go and I’ll go.”
You opened your mouth to respond, but no words came out. The atmosphere was filled with electricity, your body drowning in the warmth of his presence, the sharp seriousness in his dark eyes, and you could not bring yourself to say anything. Did you want him to leave?
No, you realized in a rush of adrenaline, you didn’t want him to leave at all.
Jungkook raised one of his eyebrows. “Hm? Nothing?” He smirked, placing himself between your legs. Every nerve of your body was screaming for you to touch him, to just wrap his mouth with yours, and you simply could not respond to any of its commands. “You’re full of surprises.”
You found your voice at that comment, heart hammering against your chest. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You’re a smart girl, you can figure it out.” Jungkook placed one strand of your hair behind your ear, his gaze flickering down to your chest. From where he stood, he could see the beautiful mounds of your breasts peeking under the fabric, licking his lips at the sight. “Can I at least say that I like your dress?”
Jungkook’s palm slithered up your knee before you could even react, moving towards your inner thigh and raising your dress along with it. His touch was electrifying, and you found yourself craving more of it, a sigh caught on your throat at the tenderness of his hot skin.
“Something tells me that your compliment isn’t so innocent,” you told him, leaning your head back slightly so you could hold his gaze. “Aren’t you gonna complete that and say that I would look better without it?”
Jungkook chuckled. “The idea is compelling, I’ll admit it,” he said, rubbing soft circles on your skin. His other hand slithered around your waist, pulling you closer to him. “But don’t need to take it off to fuck you.”
Your eyes grew wide at that, brain short-circuiting. You frankly couldn’t believe that was happening — the fact that Jungkook was so shamelessly trying (and honestly succeeding) to initiate sex with you. In a fucking church too, of all places. “What- what did you say?”
“You heard what I said.” His stare didn’t falter. Jungkook was looking at you like he could eat you whole, and you seriously wouldn’t mind if he tried to. You'd deal with the social and psychological implications of that another time. “Just tell me to stop and I’ll do it, princess. No hard feelings, promise.”
This time, you spoke out and the firmness and certainty in your voice surprised even yourself. “I don’t want you to stop.”
“No?” His voice sounded like honey, so deep and melodic even through the thick layers of his sarcasm. You had never heard him get so serious, so focused, and the thought that it was all for you was igniting a fire inside your guts. “You wanna get fucked in a church?”
You bit your lip, blinking up at him. The point was: you wanted Jungkook, of all people, to fuck you. The fact that it was in a church was just the cherry on top, and you didn’t care about it as much as you should — your mom would be weeping blood if she knew what was going on, but you weren’t planning on telling anything to anybody. “And what if I do?” You asked back teasingly.
Jungkook smiled, knocking the breath right out of you. You could only hope that you didn’t look as horny as you felt, because your pride was still on the line. “Told you that you were full of surprises.” He pushed one of your legs open, making you lose your support on the floor. Now, both of your feet were dangling off the edge, body trapped between his strong arms and thighs on either side of him. “Are you a virgin, baby?”
You shook your head, and your voice reached you a bit later. “No.”
“Naughty,” Jungkook said, leaning in. He stared at you like a lion stalking its prey, his gaze lingering on your parted lips before, at last, he tilted his head to the side, deciding to move towards your neck instead. “But if you have the taste I think you do, you probably had some lame missionary sex with some goodie-two shoes.”
When he started kissing your neck, you almost forgot to give him a response. You had to bite your lip to suppress a moan, instead producing a low, shaky sigh. “And if I did? What’s the problem with some lame missionary sex?”
“No need to get mad, I’m on your side here,” Jungkook said, one of his hands navigating up your waist, between the valley of your breasts, before grabbing your boob. That time, you couldn’t hold back the whimper that escaped you. “Did he make you cum?”
“Sometimes,” you said, slightly flustered. You didn’t think you’d be discussing your sexual history with Jungkook, but, well, there you were. “He was alright.”
“Only sometimes?” Jungkook chuckled, the vibrations of his deep timbre vibrating through the sensitive skin of your neck, his thumb grazing your nipple. The heat between your legs only grew, your entire body practically begging to feel more of him. “That’s a shame, I could do better.”
You rolled your eyes. “Don’t start getting cocky.”
“I never stopped being cocky,” he responded without hesitation. Well, he was right. “And I do have a good track record.”
“Doubt it,” you said, the ghost of a smile lingering on your lips. You knew that you were playing a dangerous game, pressing right at the weak spots of his inflated ego to see how he would react. Perhaps you’d be luckier trying to poke a bear with a short stick. “You wouldn’t know the difference between a real and fake orgasm even if it hit you in the face.”
Jungkook leaned back and looked at you for an instant. You knew he had caught onto your challenge straight away. He liked it as much as you did, there was no doubt about that. “Let’s see, shall we?” he asked. There was no denying the devilish aura that was all around him now, suffocating you with its tempting heat. “How long do we have?”
“I’m locking up the room tonight,” you said, watching as his eyes sparked with an emotion you could not decipher. “But I wanna get home before ten. Have homework.”
You could see him fighting against the natural urge to ridicule you for saying something like that at such an odd time, but, at the end, he managed to avoid it. “More than enough time.” Jungkook placed one hand on the back of your neck, gaze darting hungrily toward your lips. “Come here.”
And then his mouth was on yours, and everything else was white noise. Jungkook kissed you much slower than you had anticipated, taking his sweet time caressing your mouth with his; hands exploring the curves of your body and teasing their way underneath your dress. He sighed heavily against your mouth when you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss, his soft tongue poking out and entering your mouth perfectly. Jungkook was a good kisser, you had to admit it, and he got your knees weak sooner than you’d like.
His body was hot and firm against yours and you could feel the outline of his abs underneath your fingers as you trailed your hands down his torso; his quick heartbeat drumming on your palms. Jungkook’s breathing got heavier as you hooked your fingers on the hem of his pants and tugged him toward you. Instantly you noticed the outline of his hard cock against your inner thigh.
Then, something switched. Just as you had reached out to touch his hardness, squeezing it lightly underneath your fingers, Jungkook groaned against your mouth and bit down on your lip. You had barely any time to react before he was pulling away from the kiss, gaze darkening.
“Such a tease,” he mumbled hoarsely, his breath hitting your mouth in soft waves. His hand was hovering over your heat, his middle finger pressing down on your sensitive nub, making you whimper. “You don’t know what you do to me.”
Jungkook was much quicker than your thoughts and, within a second, the motion of your panties being pushed aside made you fumble closer to him; your hands holding tightly onto his shoulders when he finally decided to touch you.
“Fuck,” he groaned next to your ear, making your mind go blank for a split second. The teasing motions of his digits brushing your entrance were enough to make you whimper, hips thrusting forward in a failed attempt to make him move further. “Look at this, you’re soaking my fingers. Wanna get fucked that bad?”
But he didn’t let you respond. The sudden intrusion of two fingers inside your pussy made your back arch, nails digging in the leather of his jacket as Jungkook opened you up. “I—” you tried to speak, but it was hard to think when he started pumping his fingers in and out of you. The sounds of your wetness were a filthy symphony filling the quiet atmosphere. “Jungkook, what—”
“God, that’s so tight,” he groaned, speaking through clenched teeth. His voice was enough to shut you up at the spot, a frail moan dripping from your lips. “Relax, baby, you’re too tense. Let me take care of you, alright?”
You nodded, eyes drifting shut as he continued to pump his fingers in and out of you. You hated to admit it, but Jungkook was already winning against your ex by a long shot: the way his digits brushed inside you, gradually moving apart to stretch you, got you searching — begging — for more. You were sure you could cum around his fingers and, when he curled them up and they dragged against your sweet spot, the idea became a lot more palpable.
“Jungkook, you’re taking too long, I’m gonna cum like this,” you complained, chest rising and falling under the waves of your upcoming orgasm. You could feel it building up in your stomach, ready to snap, and you didn’t want it to happen around his fingers. “I wanna feel you.”
Jungkook breathed out at your needy request, placing a kiss against your jaw. “I’m just getting you ready for my cock, baby,” he said. A loud moan dripped from you when he unceremoniously added a third finger, your legs trembling on either side of his body. “I don’t know if you can take it.”
You scoffed. “Don’t flatter yourself,” you said, only half aware of the fact that your voice sounded more like a whimper than a serious comment. “I can.”
He smirked wickedly. You really were pushing his buttons. “We’ll see about that,” Jungkook responded.
Within a second, right as your orgasm was about to wash over you, he removed his fingers from your pussy. The frustrated moan you let out was quickly swollen by him, his mouth rogue against yours and the sweetness of his tongue intoxicating you — probably those stupid cupcakes, you thought.
“Turn around for me,” he asked.
You quickly did as he requested, putting your feet on the ground before turning your back to him, hands leaning on the table. Jungkook placed one hand on the curve of your spine, pushing you down until you had your chest against the surface, ass perked up and pussy in full display for him. There was a gush of cold air against your flesh when he pulled up the fabric of your dress and tossed it over your waist, exposing your lower body for him.
The boy hummed at the sight, one of his legs kicking your feet apart so he could position himself in the middle of your thighs. “You’re pretty all around,” Jungkook commented, one of his palms grazing your asscheek before grabbing it. His motion was harsh, needy; earning a whimper from you. “Knew you would be.”
Through the dense clouds of your desire, there was still some part of you that managed to make fun of that situation. “You spend your free time thinking about my ass?”
“Won’t answer until I have a lawyer present,” he joked.
You felt his fingers hooking around the fabric of your panties, pushing it further to the side so you had your cunt fully exposed for him to see. The drumming of your heartbeat almost drowned out the low groan he produced at the sight of your flushed heat.
“Princess, your pussy is dripping so much…” Jungkook trailed off, one of his fingers tracing a line between your lips. He felt the urge to eat you out, to lick you completely clean and make you cum on his tongue, but he decided that would have to wait for a different time. “Is this all for me?”
“Yeah, all for you,” you said, weak. There was a thundering exasperation building up inside you, motivated from your denied orgasm and from the way that Jungkook was taking his sweet time.
“Good girl,” he mumbled and your chest was filled with pride. “Can’t wait to fuck it.”
“Then don’t wait,” you practically begged. “Just rush.”
He removed his finger from your heat. “Shh… be patient,” Jungkook told you and you swore you could practically hear the smile in his voice. You could hear him shuffling behind you, the sound of his zipper opening echoing around that still room. “I’m gonna give you whatever you want.”
You whined at the abrupt feeling of his warm cock rubbing between your folds, its tip hitting your clit after every languid thrust. “Fuck,” you cried out, shaky. Jungkook wasn’t lying when he said that he was big, his length was so thick that you were starting to get second thoughts whether you could take it or not. Not that you would ever admit it out loud. “Just put it in, Jungkook.”
But Jungkook was having way more fun just teasing you. “Pussy’s so wet for me.” He breathed out, his hands tightening around your hips. You felt him throb between your folds, and the sensation got you searching for air. “You’re soaking my cock, baby. You want it that much?”
“Y-Yeah.”
Jungkook hummed, leaning in so he could place a kiss on your shoulder. “I’m gonna fuck you like you deserve to be fucked, princess,” he promised, his length still rubbing between your folds. He was so hard and heavy that your mind was spinning, your lungs drowning in expectation. “Gonna fuck you so well that you’re never going to forget it. Do you want that?”
“Yes,” your voice was a pathetic moan, and you hated your body for betraying you so easily. “Yes, please.”
After another pec on your shoulder, Jungkook leaned back. “Be loud for me, alright?” He asked. “Can you do that for me?”
You swallowed hard — what were the chances that someone would hear you? You had no idea. “Yeah, whatever you want, just fuck me.”
“Whatever I want? That’s a dangerous thing to say.” He moved around behind you, making you flinch when you felt his cock align with your dripping entrance. The anticipation was driving you insane. “Might have to see if you’re up for it another time.”
There was an answer somewhere in your mind — you could swear there was — but it was quickly forgotten the second that Jungkook pushed himself inside you. The drag of his cock was a delicious torture, streching you out and filling you up to the brim until you were shaking under his touch, both of you moaning at the sensation.
“Oh my god.” You breathed out, hands turning into fists on the table. Your cheek was pressed against the polished wood, hot breath creating small white clouds on the surface.
Jungkook released a shaky sigh when he felt you clenching around him, your body desperately trying to move closer to him. “Fuck, baby,” he hissed, his hands holding onto your hips for dear life. Gradually, he moved himself away from your pussy just so he could slam back inside, marveling on the way you trembled at the feeling, crying out his name in the prettiest of whimpers. “Your pussy is so fucking tight. Squeezing my cock so well.”
Took you only an instant to realize that you were absolutely addicted to the feeling of his cock inside you, the heavenly push of his hardness in and out of you as he slowly started to set a pace. “Oh my god, I’m—” a pitiful hiccup interrupted you, turning your voice into a sharp cry. “That’s so good, Jungkook.”
Jungkook chuckled behind you, his thrusts starting to pick up speed. Your eyes closed in endless bliss, every part of your brain focused on the sensation of his fat length stretching you up. “Told you I’d be, not my fault you didn’t believe me,” he said, but you could tell that his confidence had started to wear itself thin — he, too, seemed to be much more focused on the way that your bodies met. “Do you touch yourself, princess?”
You almost didn’t know how to answer him, a deep heat rushing up to your cheeks. “W-What?”
“When you’re alone, baby,” he practically hissed. You were bouncing on the table then, your body jerking up and down as he fully pistoned his cock inside your heat. “Do you play with your little pussy?”
“Y-yes,” you stammered, embarrassed. “S-Sometimes.”
“Show me how you do it,” he requested in-between huffs, lust dripping from every syllable. Jungkook spoke to you like a siren, effortlessly inducting you to comply with everything he wanted. “Come on. Don’t be shy, I wanna see you play with yourself for me.”
You didn’t even know if what you were feeling was shyness, but there was a veil of hesitation that covered your actions. As your hands moved downwards, one of them clenching around the fabric of your dress and pulling it up while the other trailed over your mound, you felt strangely vulnerable, exposed. At the same time, you wanted to do what he asked you to, wanted him to wash you over with compliments until your mind was going blank.
So you closed your eyes and focused on the sensation of two of your fingers coating themselves in your wetness, then their pressure on your clit. You whined at the feeling, pleasure exploding in your veins as you started to rub yourself, tracing small circles on your sensitive spot. There was no way you could ever reach that sensation again, the sweet motions of your fingers combining perfectly with the thrusts of his hard, fat cock inside you. You were doomed.
“That’s it… just like that, baby,” Jungkook whispered, obsessed with the sensation of your walls fluttering around him. You had gotten so tight that he thought he would see heaven at any second now. “Feels good?”
“Y-Yeah, so good...” you struggled to get out, “feels amazing, Jungkook.”
“So perfect for me,” his praise shot straight up to your core, making you mewl under him. God, the way that you were tightening around him was going to drive him insane. “You feel so fucking good, I can’t stop fucking you.”
Jungkook took one of his hands to your neck, using it to guide your body upwards until you had your back pressed against his chest; his hot lips assaulting your neck. The new position made it so much easier for his cock to drill inside you, reaching even deeper and hitting sweet spots you didn’t even know you had. It wasn’t long before you were moaning out, eyes fluttering shut as the pleasure overtook you.
“Just take a look at that, baby,” his voice broke you out of your hypnotized state. “Look at you. Such a good slut, just taking everything I’m giving you, touching yourself for my cock… fuck. Could watch you like this forever.”
You had to take a moment to understand what he was talking about, and then you saw it: the window. It stood silently across the room from you, half open, and the glass combined with the darkness of the night gave a perfect reflection of the two of you. You could see yourself, the mess you had become, as Jungkook pounded in and out of you and your fingers worked on your clit; the darkness of his hungry gaze as he followed the motions of your body against his.
Even if you cried out at the sight, your body freezed up a little at the thought of someone walking by and seeing that private spectacle. The possibility itself was minimal — the window gave way to the side of the land, where a big, thick fence separated it from the nearby houses; most of the ground covered by large trees and bushes — but it wasn’t zero. You couldn’t even begin to imagine the humiliation that would come from being seen like that.
He, of course, noticed your change of demeanor right away, and you could see in the faint reflection that he had smirked at that realization. “What is it? Are you worried someone is going to walk by?” Jungkook almost groaned against your ear. His cock continued to pump ferociously in and out of you, and you couldn’t even understand your own thoughts for a moment. “That someone is gonna see you get fucked like a good slut?”
“It’s not—” a moan cut your sentence short. Not like you knew where you were heading, anyways.
“No one is gonna see you like this, know why?” Jungkook was grunting, his fingers tightening around your throat. You cried out at the feeling, your cunt clenching around him in a way that got him fucking you even harder. “Cause this is all for me. Just for me.”
Then he was pushing you back on the table, your chest crashing against the wooden surface and his hands yanking you by the waist. Jungkook was fucking you so hard that your worries left you as soon as they arrived, your mind a turmoil of desires and broken exclamations that didn’t give space to anything else but him.
“You look fucking gorgeous like this, stuffed with cock,” he marveled at the sight. There was a known wave of pleasure hovering over you, ready to crash at any given moment, and you stopped rubbing yourself just so you could prolong its arrival. “Wanna see you cum for me, make a mess for me, baby.”
The words left you in a confusing, broken order, “Jungkook, I can’t… too much… can’t...”
“Shhh, you can,” he was slowly easing you into your orgasm, his cock drilling in and out of your pussy. Jungkook fucked like a machine, fast and precise, and you didn’t think you’d be able to forget that anytime soon. “You told me you could take it, so now you’re gonna take it. Don’t you wanna be good for me?”
“I- I want to… I’m so close,” you cried out, pressing your forehead against the table. You didn’t know how it hadn’t broken yet, with the way that Jungkook was fucking you so mercilessly hard. “I’m so, so close.”
“Cream my cock, baby, come on,” he urged you on, his member throbbing inside you at the thought. Your legs were so weak that you knew you’d fall facedown on the floor if he wasn’t supporting your weight with his strong arms. “Be a good girl and cream my cock for me.”
And that was it. That was all that you needed to push yourself over the edge, submerging you in ecstasy and making you squeeze him so deliciously. “J-Jungkook!” You moaned out his name again and again, unsure of how loud you were being, but also not caring as much as you should. Jungkook realized he loved hearing you call his name more than anything else. “Fuck! Oh my god!”
“That’s it, baby,” he moaned back, his thrusts a sloppy, uncoordinated mess. He was hypnotized by the view of your cunt hugging him, your wetness dripping down your thighs as you rode out the last seconds of your orgasm. “Pussy’s so fucking tight, so fucking perfect— gonna cum too.”
You gasped out at the sensitivity that was starting to spread, every movement shaky as you tried to push yourself against him. “Yes, please.” You looked over your shoulder, meeting his hooded gaze. Jungkook looked like a god, his dark hair sweaty and messy and his lip trapped between his teeth. That image would plague you forever. “Cum inside me, please.”
He groaned loudly, eyes closing for a second. “Fuck, that’s so fucking hot,” he hissed, chest heaving with anticipation. You knew he was close, everything pointed to that, and all that you wanted was to see him reach his high, using your body like it was just a doll for him to fuck. “Didn’t know you’d want to be filled up with cum, princess.”
“I’m full of surprises.” You smiled — a pretty, fucked-out smile that got Jungkook grunting like a madman. “I want your cum inside me, Jungkook, please.”
“Gonna fuck you full of my cum, don’t worry— Shit.” The sounds he was making were heavily: those breathy, high-pitched moans that echoed all around you; broken by deep grunts that had your thighs shaking. Jungkook fucked himself in you like he was meant for it, throwing his head back and closing his eyes as he finally found his orgasm. “Fuck! That’s it, fuck—”
Jungkook called out your name and mixed it with praises and curses when he came, spilling himself inside your pussy. You sighed at the feeling, taking in the blissful sensation of having his hot cum spilling out of you, dripping down your legs as he continued to thrust inside you, milking out his orgasm.
At last, he started to wince from sensitivity. His body collided against your back, his heavy breathing fanning your neck as he tried to collect himself. “Fuck, baby,” he mumbled, “you’re amazing.”
“You’re not so terrible yourself.” You could not help the smile that appeared on your lips, nor the way that you melted against the surface of the table, drowning in his heat.
Still, you couldn’t stay there for much longer: it was already a miracle that no one heard the chaos going on in that room, and you weren’t trying to push your luck for the night. Especially since you had a pile of homework (and possibly — now cold — takeout) waiting for you at home.
You raised your body, leaning against your elbows. “I have to leave,” you told him, taking one of your hands to lay on top of his tattooed one, trying to ease his grip from your waist. “Now if you could just…”
“Shhh, shhh,” Jungkook hushed, unrelenting. He was much stronger than you, and your muscles were too weak for you to try and do much, so you eventually gave up. “Stop moving. Let me feel you around me for just a bit more.”
You frowned. “Why?”
“I like it,” he said simply. His breath was a faint caress against the skin of your neck, and you didn’t have much fight left in you. “We all have our tastes.”
You rolled your eyes. “You’re so weird.”
“Don’t kinkshame.” Jungkook pouted, then pressed a kiss against your shoulder. “You just begged me to fuck you in a church, remember?”
“Yeah, I guess I don’t have much place to judge.” You laughed dryly, then looked over your shoulder. “Why is your cock still hard? How long is this gonna take?”
Jungkook groaned, clearly annoyed. “Shut up and enjoy the moment.”
~
The so-called moment lasted about two more minutes (which was kind of impressive, you thought) before Jungkook softened and slipped out of you. You hated to admit but you kind of liked the feeling of having him still inside you, completing you as his lips danced around your neck; fingers tenderly playing with your hair. You never thought Jungkook would be so gentle after fucking you like that, but you guessed that you weren’t the only one that was full of surprises.
Jungkook, apparently, also liked to admire his work. After he had slipped out of you, he made you sit back on the table just so he could stare at his own cum dripping out of you, a glimmer of satisfaction in his dark gaze. He had pushed his white release back inside you and smirked up at you, asking, ever so kindly, for you to go home like that, filled with his cum.
You, of course, promptly accepted it.
“By the way,” he called when you two had already stepped out of the church, enveloped by the coldness of the night. There was only one solitary light pole illuminating his features, making him look like one of the saints in the chapel — nothing but fake advertisement, in your opinion. “Wanna know how much I got in that immunology test?”
“How much?” You asked.
“Eighty two.” Jungkook smiled brightly then, and you found yourself joining him. “Never saw a grade so high in my life. And that counts all the times I’ve cheated too.”
“Seems like the tutoring sessions are paying off.” You crossed your arms before your chest, the hem of your dress swirling around your knees. The night was weirdly peaceful after everything that had taken place.
“They are.” He nodded. “I’m looking forward to the next one. Helps that my tutor is kind of a hottie too.”
You scoffed. “So I’ve heard.”
“And, by the way?”
“Yeah?”
“You would look better without it.” He pointed at your dress, a sly smile already sprouting on his lips. “Hope to see it next time.”
“Good night, Jungkook.” You rolled your eyes, already turning around — yeah, like there would ever be a next time.
~
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3. I have no idea if this time line would work, but MYX and XY get attached to each other, so when the time comes that MYX and XY need to leave Koi Tower, JGY helps them get married in secret and run away to Dongu. Anyways, a few years latter, JGY has a kid that needs to go and people in a removed location that owe him favors! Isn’t that a wonderful combination! A Jin(?) Rusong raised by Uncles Mo and Xue, or whatever they go by these days, would be very chaotic. Bonus: they start a relatively safe demonic cultivation sect, maybe with some guidance from the Nie (has NMJ never been killed by the Jin in this Au?), or more specifically, Huaisang. SL and XXC who got a happy ending decide to check out this no blood line sect (it looks slightly dubious, but surely can’t be to bad! Right?) A-Qing at least is enjoying her new friend -🟪🦋
Should Have Been Listening - ao3
“Let go of me.”
“I won’t,” Mo Xuanyu said, clutching Xue Yang’s arm. “I won’t, I won’t! You’re my only friend here!”
Xue Yang looked down at him in what he thought was mostly exasperation, but might have also been a little fondness – after all, if it’d been anyone else who’d grabbed him, he’d have stabbed them.
He still didn’t know why he didn’t stab Mo Xuanyu, too, but in all honesty, he wasn’t that interested in exploring it. He did what he wanted, and right now, he didn’t want to murder Mo Xuanyu.
Irritating as he sometimes was.
“Little brat,” he said. “I have important business to go do.”
“It’s not something that he ordered, though!”
“So what?” Xue Yang bristled. “I don’t just do what hetells me!”
“But that means he won’t cover for you, and that means you’ll get in trouble!” Mo Xuanyu argued. “How can I let you go all alone to get in trouble? You have to take me with you! What will you do without me? Who’ll keep you entertained and sneak sweets for you if not for me?”
Xue Yang’s lips twitched. Okay, maybe there was a reason he kept the brat around.
“You don’t understand,” he said. “This is something I’ve got to do – something I’ve wanted to do for a long time. I’m going to kill a lot of people and get into a lot of trouble, more trouble than ever before. I’ll probably lose my life. How can I possibly take you with me?”
Mo Xuanyu scowled up at him. It was a very weak scowl – barely more than a pout. “You think that’s going to make me not want to come with you?”
Xue Yang’s eyebrows went up. “You cry at the sight of blood!”
“I cry at a lot of things!”
Xue Yang wasn’t sure how to respond to that. It was true, Mo Xuanyu cried at a lot of things.
“Maybe if I come with you, it won’t be so bad!”
Yeeeeah, Xue Yang wasn’t going to count on that.
“Or maybe you don’t have to go…?”
“I have to go,” he explained. “If I don’t go, I can’t get revenge, and I have to have revenge.”
Mo Xuanyu blinked up at him.
“I don’t really understand, but okay,” he said, and tugged on his arm. “Let’s go together, then. I promise I won’t cry!”
-
He cried.
He cried a lot.
-
“Stop fucking crying.”
-
“Just – ugh. Listen. You’re ruining the mood.”
-
“If you can’t stop crying, go away. Now. Or I’ll stab you!”
-
“Okay, see, look, I just killed the leaders, see? Just the old men. Everyone else is just locked in their rooms. Once the sect leader comes back, I’ll kill him too, and that’ll be all. Okay? Everyone else lives. I promise. Now stop crying, okay?”
-
“I don’t want to know,” Jin Guangyao said when they got back. “I don’t want to know at all.”
“Good,” Xue Yang grumbled. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Enough people heard about the reason for what you did that opinions are mixed as to whether your actions were the Chang clan’s just rewards for their former misdeeds or if they were actually wrong,” Jin Guangyao said. He looked irritated. “But you still killed high-ranking members of a sect, and you left enough alive that they’re demanding your head on a platter. You’re going to need to run away.”
Mo Xuanyu hesitantly gestured as if he wished to speak.
“Yes, you can go with him. Now that my father is dead, no one cares where you are.”
Mo Xuanyu beamed.
“You’re just going to let us go?” Xue Yang asked suspiciously. “That seems unlike you. What’s in it for you?”
“Oh, I’m not just going to let you go. I’m going to give you money, too,” Jin Guangyao said. “And all you need to do for me is one little tiny favor –”
Pity that that was when Xue Yang stopped listening, too busy staring at Mo Xuanyu’s delighted face and counting all the way he was in for it now.
-
“I’ve always wanted to take care of a baby,” Mo Xuanyu said happily.
“Good for you,” Xue Yang said darkly as he stalked through the streets.
He would rather that Jin Guangyao had needed a body buried and a death covered up or something – and judging by the baby’s perturbed expression, it probably agreed with him. Fuck, maybe Jin Guangyao had meant for them to murder the baby once they got it far enough out of the way. It was just as plausible as Mo Xuanyu's assumption that they were supposed to take care of it.
Damnit, maybe he should have been listening.
“Listen, neither of us are equipped to handle a baby. Go find a woman to help us – someone poor and helpless who doesn’t have any other choice.”
“Okay!”
-
Xue Yang shut his eyes. “What exactly,” he said slowly, “did you think I asked you to get us a woman for, exactly?”
“To…watch the baby?” Mo Xuanyu guessed. “When we’re busy or sleeping? Anyway, what’s wrong with A-Qing, anyway? She’s nice!”
“I’m not nice,” A-Qing said. The damn brat was smirking – and for once it wasn’t his damn brat, but some blind brat with a cocky expression. “I stole your wallet and you burst into tears and it was really embarrassing.”
“He does that,” Xue Yang said wearily. At least he’d noticed the theft this time – all of his lessons in ‘how not to be a sucker and get constantly taken advantage of’ were maybe having something of an impact. Maybe. “For some reason I’m apparently into it.”
He couldn’t explain it any other way.
“…loser.”
“I will stab you,” Xue Yang threatened. “I don’t care if you’re blind.”
“Won’t someone tell me why A-Qing isn’t a perfectly good babysitter?” Mo Xuanyu demanded. He was holding the baby in his arms again – the baby liked him more than it did Xue Yang, which meant that between Mo Xuanyu and the baby, the baby had better self-preservation instincts – and he was trying his best stern scowl which was of course barely more than a pout and a so-called ‘fierce’ expression that made Xue Yang want to laugh.
Not even Mo Xuanyu’s horrific make-up skills could make thatface intimidating. Or maybe it was just that the person behind the face was just so completely unthreatening that there was no help for it?
“Well? Tell me!”
Xue Yan opened his mouth, then shrugged and shut it again.
A-Qing patted Mo Xuanyu on the shoulder. “I’m too young. No milk.”
“…milk?”
“You know. The thing babies eat?”
“…milk,” Mo Xuanyu repeated, only now he looked absolutely heartbroken at having failed the mission that Xue Yang had assigned him almost entirely just to get him out of the way while Xue Yang collected some spare cash and threatened their way onto a ride out of this piece of shit town.
“It’s fine,” Xue Yang said hastily. “We’ll just get a goat or something, I don’t know.”
“Okay, I actually only came here to laugh at you,” A-Qing said. “But now I’m legitimately worried about this baby. Don’t you two know anything? How’d you even get a baby, anyway?”
-
“Stop laughing. It’s not that funny.”
-
“Seriously. Stop laughing, or I stab you.”
“Don’t worry, A-Qing,” Mo Xuanyu said. “He doesn’t mean it! Threats are just how he expresses affection!”
“It most certainly is not.”
“That is absolutely amazing,” A-Qing said, wiping her eyes. “Best thing I’ve ever heard., if by best I mean worse-but-hilarious. I mean. If that’s what he considers affection, what must his flirting be like?”
“No one is flirting with anyone!”
-
“Are you going to leave at some point?”
“Obviously not,” A-Qing said. She’d caught the same ride as them, using Xue Yang’s cash no less – Mo Xuanyu had insisted that it was the least they could do after the whole milk misunderstanding, which was stupid, she ought to be paying them for wasting their time. Xue Yang couldn’t wait to get rid of her, although he had to admit that she’d been pretty useful in terms of putting on the ‘poor sad blind girl and her two brothers all alone in the world’ act to get them a room at the inn at prices even Xue Yang felt comfortable paying. “Are you joking? This is so much funnier than walking by myself. Anyway, I enjoy watching people crash and burn.”
“Aren’t you too young to be such a bitch?” Xue Yang hissed. “And, I don’t know, blind?”
“You know what I mean.”
“I don’t care what you –”
The sound of crying came from the other room.
It was quickly followed by a second set of crying.
Xue Yang felt the onset of a headache.
“…truce?” A-Qing suggested sweetly, as if she knew exactly how much it pissed him off and thought it was the funniest thing ever, which was…probably accurate, actually. “I’ll get the baby to stop crying if you do the same with Mo Xuanyu.”
Yeah, that was definitely a headache. The sort of headache called why do I like that brat.
Mo Xuanyu owed him so much candy for putting up with this shit.
“Fine,” Xue Yang said begrudgingly. “Truce. Temporarily. And then you leave!”
-
“So we live here now, huh?” A-Qing said, looking around the house they’d claimed. “That’s neat.”
“Why do you live with us again?” Xue Yang asked her, though by now he barely even meant it. A-Qing was clearly another one in the same mold as Mo Xuanyu: you just couldn’t say no to her…or, rather, you could, at length and top volume and with threats, only it just didn’t stick. “I definitely did not recall asking you to stay.”
Though it was nice to have someone else around that wasn’t going to get immediately ripped off by literally anyone who came their way. Mo Xuanyu’d started getting conned by the literal infant that they were taking care of – he was completely hopeless.
Also, questionably blind or not, at least A-Qing had no hesitation about beating people with her stick if they struck her the wrong way, which was a life approach Xue Yang agreed with wholeheartedly.
“She’s going to learn to cultivate!” Mo Xuanyu chirped from where he was applying his make-up. “Demonic cultivation, too! We had a whole discussion about it while you were out getting groceries!”
That made a certain amount of sense, Xue Yang supposed. You didn’t need talent to be a demonic cultivator – technically speaking, given his bloodline, Mo Xuanyu was more naturally gifted in cultivation than Xue Yang, which was just wrong on all sorts of levels – and it was certainly more effective a defense mechanism than A-Qing’s stick. If there were two of them, they could protect Mo Xuanyu and the baby more effectively, taking shifts when needed, and Mo Xuanyu, who was also going to learn demonic cultivation no matter how many times Xue Yang had to hammer it into his head, could be the last line of defense, largely since no one would ever expect him to be able to do…anything…and they’d be right, too.
So it wasn’t the craziest idea in the world, only…
“…who is she going to be learning from, exactly!?”
-
“Have you ever considered charging for your skill in teaching cultivation lessons instead of your skill in stabbing people?” A-Qing asked one day. They were lying on the ground and having the corpses they’d raised fan them to try to reduce the temperature – it was that sort of day. Also, Mo Xuanyu, who might’ve objected, wasn’t around. “You’re not actually that bad at this. Might be more profitable, and less work. Just a thought.”
“Shut up. I’m great at stabbing people.”
“Yeah, but then after a while we have to move because people get annoyed at that, and it’s getting a little annoying to have to pack up all the time.”
“We’d have to move anyway. We’re wanted criminals, remember?”
“We could be wanted criminals with a house. Besides, wouldn’t you like to be called Teacher Xue?”
“What? No. Gross.”
-
“So you see, it turns out that they were teaching demonic cultivation in a safe and organized fashion,” Xiao Xingchen explained enthusiastically. “They’d even gathered up their own little sect! And of course everyone heard what the Chang clan did, so there’s no need to worry about them going around and murdering people at random – it was a targeted revenge scheme.”
“We’re working on teaching them regular cultivation,” Song Lan agreed, nodding. “To help mitigate the negative effects of demonic cultivation…well, we started out by just teaching them.”
“It turned out that they’d been secretly teaching all of the local delinquents, too, or at least Mo-gongzi had been teaching a few and Mistress Qing was teaching a few others, and even Sect Leader Xue had a few disciples,” Xiao Xingchen said, politely omitting or possibly having not noticed the fact that Mo Xuanyu had been teaching his ‘friends’ (read: scammers trying to take advantage of him), while A-Qing and Xue Yang had each been trying to form competing gangs and/or obtain lackeys. Xue Yang didn’t mind the oversight, largely on account of the fact that A-Qing had been winning, damn her – he’d kept getting distracted by inventing new things. “And a few of them had real talent – and you know that Zichen and I have always wanted to start a sect of our own, with no bloodline ties –”
“We’re joining their sect,” Song Lan said. “We’ll be leading the orthodox side, while they lead the demonic cultivation aspect – safely, of course.”
“I guess it’s better than them being crazy,” Jiang Cheng said. He sounded dubious. “I don’t like it, but at least all the demonic cultivators can be in one spot, you know?”
He made it sound like they’d be dropping off new ones there in the future.
Like they’d opened up some sort of pet rescue and were taking in unwanted puppies or something.
“Agreed,” Nie Mingjue said. “To the extent that they aren’t causing active harm, containment seems an appropriate remedy here. Who seconds the motion?”
“I do,” Lan Xichen said, and smiled at the newly agreed-upon sect. “Welcome back to the cultivation world, Sect Leader Xue.”
-
“I don’t want to know,” Jin Guangyao said, glaring.
“Don’t worry,” Xue Yang told him. “This comes as much of a shock to me as to you.”
The glare intensified, but that was fine. Jin Guangyao’s facial expressions, however minor and generally overlooked, had been the only thing getting him through that awful, awful meeting just now where people kept trying to salute him and make him salute back and if he didn’t then he was letting down Mo Xuanyu (who would send him a sad look) and A-Qing (who would hear about it from Mo Xuanyu later and then find a way to step on his foot right when he was concentrating on something).
Not to mention their two new resident lovebirds, who looked so righteous and proper from the outside but who also may or may not have accidentally full-on actually resurrected some dead asshole cultivator more or less the first time they’d joined Xue Yang in his demonic cultivation laboratory – which would have been fine, you know, that happened in demonic cultivation though not normally to quite such a wow-is-he-actually-alive extent, except that the guy’s intermittent moments of clarity suggested that his two new sect members might have just brought back the Yiling Patriarch himself, which was going to make all of them wanted criminal again the second anyone found out about it.
Ugh.
Being called sect leader was completely not worth this shit.
Xue Yang comforted himself with the reminder that later today he was planning on publicly introducing Jin Guangyao to the Xue sect’s head junior disciple “Xue Song” and announcing loudly that the brat needed some lessons in manners, that he’d heard that that was Lianfeng-zun’s specialty, and nominating him to take care of the kid while they were visiting.
See how the fucker liked that.
“I always knew Xue-gege could do great things!” Mo Xuanyu said, clapping his hands as A-Qing rolled her (by now, Xue Yang was almost definitely sure not actually blind) eyes behind his back. “As long as I went with him!”
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A Stupid Idea Au
Chapter Eight
Summer was coming, and the ink was running down the walls, it was school vacation, and the parents were looking for a way to free Bendy without him being in any danger.
Because he was locked up, his environment was getting damp by magic perhaps, or he was just rolling around as a child usually does, but all over the apartment.
Raising a child is difficult, but raising an infant demon is even more difficult.
Seeing himself in the mirror, was something Bendy hated, since the demons themselves, are forbidden to see themselves, i.e. Cuphead and Mugman see him in a state of normalcy in the reflections, but Bendy sees a beast in them.
So, he hates to see himself in the reflections, even his younger brothers hate him.
-Go somewhere, the amusement park is old, but I swear it's the best!" the blue cup lifts the boy's spirits so he stops lying lizard-like on top of a bucket of ice.
-But daddy, it might have been that in your day, but now it's very unstable," begged the infant to stay there, he was tired and hot, the cup heads boiling in the air.
-Hey, I may be your father, but I'm not old, I mean, I just turned 18, it's no big deal," he replied angrily, despite having the life of an adult, the mugs are not as such,
-I'll be fine, don't worry," he replied cheerfully.
Mugman arched an eyebrow, he didn't quite know if his son was right, or not, but if he was comfortable with staying on top of that ice bucket all day, it wouldn't stop him.
The cup walked over to his brother and gave him a good shove.
-Let's go to the beach, we didn't go several years ago!
-You go, I'm going to stay with Bendy, you know what the boy is capable of.
-You seem to be taking the role of being his "mother" very seriously, it's funny! -Mugman laughed, apparently there was new news for Mugs, for his mood seemed to be unwavering.
And yes there was.
Soon Bendy would be returning to his real home by correspondence, more unwelcome news there would be after all.
In a few weeks classes would begin, starting with a presumed test of knowledge.
The little demon was sure he would do very well this year, better than in previous years.
-Pops, did you ever have a girlfriend," the little boy asked.
-Girlfriend? nah, they just empty your pocket, don't you see Mugman, it seems that in a few days he will go bankrupt.
-Oh, so you never had one?
-Never," answered the red cup to his son, the little devil sat next to his father watching what Cup was observing, it was beginning to get dark and the hours of heat were ending, Bendy felt that something would happen, his peaceful life would take a different course from then on.
Cup rested him on her lap, she knew very well that her little boy would go to his real parents, she didn't want to leave his side, she didn't want to see the room empty and have to clean it every so often again.
-Ben, have you thought about an outing in the city?
-uh?
-I'm just saying, we can go through the streets, as a last tour?
-Last?...well, when are we going?
-In a few minutes, just let me stretch my legs!
Father and son walked through the cold streets of Inkwell, it was a silent and eerie night, the holidays were over and the days were back to what they were before.
Sometimes they took shelter from the cold on a seat, while they ate their dinner of legumes and few meats.
-Is there something wrong?" asked little Bendy, Cuphead looked discouraged, almost lost, I had never seen him like that before.
-No, there's nothing special going on," answered the young adult.
-You look like there is something wrong," he insisted.
-Ahh, I'm starting to get old and bitter like Mugman hahahaha- they started laughing in the middle of the street.
Even though Bendy only sees the world in black, white and red, he felt a lot of warmth next to the cup, a goodbye would have been the emotional end of both parties.
-Do you want to be rich?" said the mug in an airy tone.
-Well, if given the chance, I'd like to be!
-Lucky for you, that you will be soon, and tell me how it feels.
-Really?" Bendy had had many disappointments with gifts, money and useful materials.
-Of course, and believe me when I tell you that!
They imagined what it would feel like to be in a higher class than a waiter.
Maybe to have a room of your own with things that are really yours.
To be showered with money and other fantasies like being able to boss your own teacher around at your own discretion.
That night, it was one of the last they would spend together.
VERSIÓN EN ESPAÑOL
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Yet another post of random incorrect quotes because guess who's bored again XD (sorry this ended up being so long jalkdfjalsk)
...
Tommy, during an apocalyptic scale disaster: The world just ended. And that is NOT poggers.
...
Tubbo, while in a safe house with Ranboo during the Crimsonpocalypse: Ranboo. Did you hear about the explosion at the cheese shop?
Ranboo: ...what. What cheese shop?
Tubbo, snickering: Yeah, well. The Brie was everywhere.
Ranboo: ...
Ranboo: ...this apocalypse has officially gone on for too long.
...
Bad before killing the Crimson: Hello, demons. It's me. Ya boi. *unleashes attack*
...
Tommy, just after a mission briefing: Sorry for spacing out, there's a lot of thoughts in my mind. What are we supposed to do again?
Ranboo: Thoughts? In your mind? Unrealistic.
Tommy:
Tommy: I will break into your house and repaint all your furniture & walls slightly different shades every week until you lose your mind.
(Unfortunately for Tommy, Ranboo can't remember the shade the day before and doesn't notice the difference. Tommy keeps doing it, but doesn't realize that it doesn't have any effect...other than multiple paint companies wondering where the fuck their paint supply disappeared to).
...
Tommy: That's ridiculous! I'm a big man! I'm poggers and very strong and stoic.
Tubbo: Literally yesterday you cried over dragons.
Tommy, tearing up: They can't blow out their birthday candles...
...
Tommy: I’m Mr Zoomer and I zoom and I speed and I cause traffic jams.
...
Velvet to the teller, while robbing a bank: Hello, can you help me? You see, i'm very gay and I need a few dollars.
...
Punz, during a date: No skeletons in your closet, I hope?
Sam Nook, a robot: I don’t have a skeleton
...
Karl: I'm sorry, you were stabbed?
Sapnap, rolling his eyes: Lightly stabbed. I didn't want to scare you.
...
Quackity, over text and responding to the 18 missed calls he missed from Karl while running from Schlatt (again): Sorry I didn't text sooner. Might've been somewhat kidnapped and stabbed but on my way back. Will be there in time for dinner! See you soon xoxo
Karl: SOMEWHAT kidnapped???? Stabbed??? What the HONK
Sapnap: who are they AND WHERE DO I FIND THEM I'LL FUCKING KILL THEM AND MAKE SURE THEY'LL BURN IN HELL- [insert numerous ways of torturing the person with fire]
(also hc that sapnap and quackity's form of flirting/love declaration is not "I'll love you to the moon and back" or "I'll move mountains for you", but it's threatening to hurt/kill those who hurt them - which unnerved karl at first but he finds it really sweet and hot.)
(pls don't kill me for this hc XD)
...
(around the time Sam and Ponk first started dating)
Sam, seeing Ponk in his hoodie for the umpteenth time: God, Ponk, why don't you ever wear your own clothes??? You have a million other hoodies.
Ponk, huddling in the thick hoodie: I like your hoodie, it makes me feel-
Sam: -like a thief?
Ponk, blushing: No. It makes me feels safe :)
Sam, blushing as well: ...awwwwwwww ponkie <3
...
Sam: Is something burning?
Ponk: Just my love for you
Sam: …
Ponk: And possibly also the lemon cake I was baking.
...
Ponk: Sam, ju- just please stop reheating tea in the microwave and start boiling it in a kettle like a normal person??
Sam: no <3
...
Sam, in response to a villain mocking Ponk "oh, your boyfriend has to come and save your ass again huh" when Sam arrives as backup for a mission: You're a child. An infant. Your mocking is thus infantile. He's not my boyfriend. This man is more to me than you can dream. He's the moon when I'm lost in darkness, and warmth when I shiver in cold. His heart overflows with the kindness of which this world is not worthy of. I love this man beyond measure and reason.
Sam: He's not my boyfriend. He's all, and he's more.
Villain: ....
Ponk, blushing like hell: ...you're an incurable romantic.
...
(bonus)
Nug, during the death arena (sorry for this but this just sounded funny): FUCK being the bigger person! I'm just- I'm just gonna start biting people.
...
(bonus part 2)
(hc that quackity only opens up about his past whenever he drinks till he's really drunk and babbling and that's how sapnap and karl finds out about his past as an experiment subject.)
(and here's how one such "opening-up heart-to-heart session" might play out)
Quackity, drinking and sees Schlatt somehow show up on TV: J MOTHERFUCKING SCHLATT??? STUPID IDIOT MOTHERFUCKING SCHLATT. GOD DAMN FOOL, DUST EATING RAT OLD BASTARD SHITHEAD, IDIOT AVATAR OF THE WHORE, BIGGEST CLOWN IN THE CIRCUS, LAUGHED OUT OF TOWN COWBOY MOTHERFUCKIN J SCHLATT.
Karl: ...umm Big Q, maybe you shouldn't drink any more-
Quackity: FUCKING J SCHLATT, if I wanted to get into heaven and God said fucking J SCHLATT is waiting inside, I would piss on God's feet for the sole purpose of getting sent back down.
Sapnap: ...Karl, do you think we should get Puffy for this-
Quackity: FUCK that man and all he's ever done. He better have some fucked up backstory for this. If he's just some rich shithead who did all this fucked up shit for the sole purpose of his pleasure and entertainment, I will go fucking ham. Asshole's better have been experimented on himself cause if he didn't I'm going to fucking make him.
Karl, pulling his phone out: ooohkay I think we should give her a call.
Quackity: WHERE THE FUCK IS J SCHLATT. If he's still alive then I'm going to really fucking wish he wasn't and put him six feet under myself. Crusty. old. man. I'll punch J Schlatt and his sad frail old man twig bones will simply flake apart under my epic huge meat fist, and he will disintegrate until all that's left is one final bottle of his stupid alcohol stash, a bottle so fucking old that it has an inscription on the bottom saying "NOW You Fucked Up" in ancient Yiddish.
Sapnap, hugging Quackity and trying to gently take the bottle from him: Hey, enough of that-
Quackity, snatching it back and taking one last sip from the bottle of whiskey: I'm fine. Motherfucking screw J Schlatt. Rot in hell for all I care. Gonna go to his funeral for the sole purpose of making an eulogy. "May his memory be fucking scorched from the earth and as insignificant as the fucking worm that he was." Perfect.
(dw quackity is doing okay after that! why wouldn't he be, when he has his boyfriends to help him? :] )
- 🏒
(incorrect quotes taken from various sources - kudos if you figure out where quackity's rant is from)
#ttau#tommyinnit#tubbo#ranboo#awesamdude#ponk#awesamponk#punz#sam nook#quackity#karl#sapnap#karlnapity#tw drinking#tw alcohol#long post
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Everything Undesired chapter 12
chapter 11
Warning: kidnapping
A/N: I hope y'all are ready for a very heavy chapter because toward the end our Greed boi is going to go to a very dark place with his real thoughts on Cyrus.
“Do you think he does?” Belphie asked as he watched his older brother feed the baby.
“It would make sense.” The second-born shrugs. “I think Lucifer realized it too ‘n that’s why he was in such a big hurry for Beel and him to leave.”
The seventh-born only nods in response. “Hey I heard you three are going up to the mortal world after the term... Is that true?”
“Yeah... ‘Rella says she wants to go back to her home in York. I like the idea- been there a couple times with her after Solomon taught her to summon us. It’s nice. Hardly anybody stops by so it should be relaxin’ ‘n maybe it’ll do the baby some good to get away from the house for a bit.”
“More power to you, since we don’t know a whole lot about what kind of nutrients cambions need to begin with, it’ll probably be good for him to get some sunlight, I guess. Hey, why’re you holding the bottle that way? Doesn't it make more sense to hold it higher so he finishes eating faster?”
“Nah, any higher and he could take too much and inhale it while he’s eating. Learned that out the hard way with Satan. Plus, lowers your chances of gettin' spat up on.”
“It’s crazy that you stepped up like that for him... How did you do it?” The Avatar of Sloth leans his head against Mammon’s shoulder.
“Lots of sleepless nights and lots of coffee- I swear, m’blood probly consisted of just coffee back then,” Mammon pulls the bottle away from Cyrus after he had finished eating and started to burp him, “at least for those first few months anyway.”
“I’m not surprised,” Belphie hums.
“S'why our rooms are right next to each other. That way I wasn’t having to risk poppin’ my stitches runnin’ through the halls just t’get to him before he could wake any of y’all up. Man, that thing took forever t’heal. Not t’mention it kept getting infected since between watchin’ out for the lil’ ball of wrath that was our brother ‘n school, ‘n plannin’ Lilith’s service, I only had the time t’really take care of it when I showered save for the rare moments I had to change my bandages...” Mammon is silent for a moment, “I don’t regret it though. Gettin' to see him grow up to become a strong demon and knowing I made that possible, makes it all the reward itself.”
The younger brother only nods as he notices the infant’s eyes were glued to him- more specifically at his face. “What’re you staring at, kid? Do I have something on my face?”
“Nah, it’s just a thing babies do around this age. Its more about learning faces and facial expressions right now,” The older brother explains.
“Considering what you went through, you seem awfully calm now when you deal with him.”
“It's parental instinct and nothing more right now. Think of it as your body moving on its own. If I’m being honest with you, it’s still kind of hard- especially when he gets clingy like this but I think I’m gettin' better with him- acceptin' reality for what it is and learning to bond with him. Believe me, Belphie this isn’t how I wanted to have my first kid, but,” Mammon lets out a depressed sigh, “I’m a father now... and that means I have to suck it up and get my shit together. It’s what he deserves at the very least.”
“Wow, I guess what they say is true, huh? You really do change your ways once you have a kid.”
“Whatcha mean by that? I feel like I should feel insulted...”
“Sorry, it wasn’t meant to come out that way, Mams... It’s just that it feels like you’ve changed. Before all this, there wasn’t a single day where you went without thinking of easy ways to make a quick grimm, not a day where we didn’t have to take inventory of our stuff in fear that you had stolen something valuable of ours, went on massive shopping sprees whenever you could, but now... now, you don’t do any of that. It’s like you grew up somehow... like you’re back to how you were when we were angels and how you were way back when we had just fallen and your sin hadn’t quite settled in yet, you know?”
“Let’s just say priorities have changed...”
“Well, whatever the reason, it’s a nice change. I’m going to head to bed now. See you around.” Belphie smiled as he got up and left.
“See ya, Belphie.”
------------------------------------------------
He doesn’t remember how long he sat with Cyrus until the little one fell asleep against his chest, but once he placed the infant in the crib, he just stood there, lost in dark thoughts.
“It’s funny...” The white-haired demon’s voice was hardly above a whisper, “I should resent your presence in my life- wish you were never born, hate you. The worst part of me- the scummy part of me- does. You took everything that I was reserving for my child with Arella and you’re a representation of everything your birth mother did to me but... I can’t- and that’s what I hate most about you. Maybe my reason for keepin’ you comes from a fear that I won’t have the guts to risk my mate’s life that way so I just took the closest alternative I could ever get to that... I know... I know I’m being selfish by keeping her for myself as long as I can and not giving her that family with me she wants so badly and it makes me angry to watch her give a child that’s not even hers so much love when you shouldn’t have ever existed in the first place... Now it's far too late to get rid of you without hurting her.... I made the wrong choice for me even though I know ultimately it was the right one for you.”
He bit his tongue as a snarl formed on his face. Here, with no one to hear him, Mammon would let out his true feelings as wrong as it was. As if letting them out would somehow change his feelings for this child.
“For now, I’ll lie and pretend for your sake and everyone else’s. No one will ever know the way I wish Lucifer just would have done away with ya and part of me wonders... if a lower demon were to attack you and none of my brothers or Arella were there to spur me to action, would I even bother to protect you or would I dare to act selfishly and just let you die? Let the problem resolve itself? Ya better prove that you were ever worth what I’ve been putting myself through in the first pla-”
A sudden bout of clarity strikes the demon, the weight of what he had just said hit him like a stack of bricks and suddenly he can’t breathe. Oh devils, he can’t breathe under the weight of it all. Was he really that messed up in the head that he would do this to his own child? That he would force Cyrus to earn his love when he knows he should just give it to him unconditionally? What happened to all that progress he thought he’d been making? What kind of father would that make him? His eyes widened in horror at the thought as he broke down in silent tears.
How unfit of a father am I? He thought, He’s my son and I can’t even bring myself to love him? I really am the worst scum of the devildom. I’ve been holding some kind of grudge against a baby for crying out loud! Is this how I would act if Arella and I had a kid and they killed her?! The thought terrifies him. He wanted so badly to be a father and now that he was, this is the way he reacted to it? Unforgivable. Mammon remembered how it felt to fight for his father’s love and how he felt when Arella told him about her horrible mother and he felt so disgusted with it but wasn’t he just the same?
As he sank down to his knees, he felt a tiny hand grasp one of his fingers and his head snapped up. There was his son who had managed to wiggle his way closer to the edge of the crib, watching him with eyes full of what appeared to be fear. It froze his blood to see that look on anyone, let alone his own child. Without thinking, the Avatar of Greed rushes forward, scoops the child up and holds his son close to his chest.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers as fresh tears begin to fall. “I’m so sorry. I’m sorry.” Apologies tumble from his mouth in between choked sobs. “I said all those terrible things to ya. I don’t mean them. I don’t.” He doesn’t know who he’s trying to convince more at this point. Was it himself or his son? “I love ya. I love ya. I love ya. I’ll change. I’ll do anything I can for you- give you everything ya deserve.”
The baby only cooed softly, trying so hard to lift his head up, but with the way his father was held his head to his chest left no other option but for Cyrus to pat his hands against his father’s chest.
------------------------------------------------
Over the coming years, Mammon held true to his word on that dark night. He embraced his son fully and finally formed a deep bond with him. There were some good days, some bad, but never once had the demon let his mind wander back to that dark place of hate and malice. At some point, the Avatar of Greed was even able to move past the rape all together and he felt completely at peace with everything that had happened to bring his son into his life. He and Arella had even decided to take the chance to bring a new life into this world and were now expecting a set of twins. Everything felt right. But peace is never lasting for demons and Mammon has always been unlucky.
It was five minutes. Five. Damn. Minutes. Mammon should have known better. Cyrus had gone with his father to one of his photoshoots. Typically, he kept the boy in his sights at all times but this time he allowed his director to turn his attention elsewhere for a better shot from a different angle. When the demon turned back to check on his child, Cyrus was nowhere to be seen and the Avatar of Greed panicked. It was only five minutes but he was gone. He hoped the little one had just gone off to use the bathroom and would be back shortly, but after a few minutes of nervous waiting, Cyrus never reappeared.
The whole set went into a frenzy searching for the child but he was nowhere to be found in the building. Mammon wanted to scream. How could he have let this happen? His child was taken. The white-haired demon couldn’t even finish the photoshoot as he dashed out the door searching- looking for any possible trail that would lead him to Cyrus, but there was nothing. Not even a scent trail to follow. He feels his heart break as horrible thoughts ran rampant through his head. That crushing weight from five years earlier was back.
With shaking hands, he pulled out his D.D.D. from his pocket and called his older brother. Told him everything that happened. How he let his child be abducted because he got careless, how he’s searched every conceivable place he could think of. After that, the entire family mobilized. Levi ordered his Navy to search for the boy, other smaller search parties were formed as well but nothing ever came of them. They even asked Solomon to search the mortal world and there were some leads but that too led to dead ends.
Mammon, Arella and the rest of the Avatars were left heartbroken by the loss. Not even with the birth of their twins were the parents able to find peace. Six months went by, then a year, then three- after five, the searches were called off. His body was never found, which left everyone with hope. It was hope that Mammon would hold onto until he was left with no other choice.
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Next
There’s one more part left: an epilogue stay tuned folks.
Find more on my masterlist
#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me swd#obey me! shall we date?#obey me angst#mammon angst#obey me mammon#om! mammon#obey me belphegor#om! belphegor
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A Father’s Protection
Muzan Kibutsuji x daughter reader
Requested by: @the-seduction-anon
“Muzan kills baby readers parents but decides to raise them as his own. He makes them believe that demons are good and the demon slayers are evil. They want to help kill them but Muzan just wants to protect his child from the Pillars.”
Warning: Bit of angst, fluff
Thank you for the request. Please enjoy.
The utter confusion that filled every single Moon demon when they saw Muzan walking through the building, holding a small human infant in his arms was baffling. At first, they assumed it was a snack for him to have later, and she was originally supposed to be just that.
But then he looked into those wide [Eye colour] orbs, he saw no fear, only curiosity. She was too young to understand what had happened, how her parents had tried to protect her against the crimson eyed demon and fell during this, how he stood over their corpses without a second thought for who they were. To him, they were humans and he was far above anything they could ever be. But when she looked at him, no fear at all despite the blood on his claws, he felt something. He told himself that he would bring the child back to his home to eat later.
He didn’t. He wanted to, this child was nothing more than a pest and yet when his coal black claws pressed against her skin, his entire arm went stiff. He just...couldn’t. The infant looks at his hand and actually grabbed it, leaning into his palm and hugged his hand. An unfamiliar warmth flowed through his entire system at this, the way that his bitter rage seemed to fade around this child. It was all so baffling for him how this small, tiny human could have such an overwhelming effect on him.
That was when he decided to keep her as his own.
***
Soft footsteps lightly patted against the flooring, [Eye colour] orbs looking around the dark room and spotting a knife on the side. [Name] walked over to the table and picked up the knife, being careful to keep the blade away from her flesh and turned to the room itself. A wide, clear space with plenty of room for her. She held the knife and remembered when she watched the other demons training and tried to copy their movements.
She knew that the building was a place where her father’s most loyal and strongest followers came. The Twelve Moon Demons. Muzan had told her the truth of him and his kind but, of course, he did twist it a little. To [Name], demons were just trying to survive in a world where their kind wish to be eliminated just because they were not human. He has whispered these things to her as long as he has had her, just shy of two years now. She was old enough to walk about by herself and allowed her to express her curious nature.
None of the other demons were so much as allowed to touch her. Muzan has made that quite clear to them that if any harm befell upon [Name] then there would be Hell to pay. It had surprised even Muzan himself the intensity of his protective nature over this girl yet he did not care. To him, and all the other demons that exist, she was his daughter and none dared question him.
The funny thing was, even after being told that demons have to eat humans to survive, [Name] did not fear them nor her father. It was another thing that surprised them.
[Name] tried to focus in the room, demons were strong and if she tried hard enough, she could be too. They told her that there were humans who hunted them, the Pillars. After being told of them, she would sneak off to this room every day when her father rested and tried to train herself to become stronger. She wanted to help protect her father and his followers.
She tried to keep her footsteps quick but light and her swings with the knife quick as well; though this was cut short when she tripped over her robe and fell to the floor, the blade cutting her hand a bit. Holding her hand, she tried to keep the blood from getting everywhere and bit back her tears. Demons were strong, they didn’t cry and so she couldn’t either.
“[Name], what are you doing?” She turned around to see her father standing in the doorway of the room, faint concern furrowed his brow when he saw the blood on her hand. He approached her and kneeled beside her, “Let me see.” [Name] did as told as held her hand out for him, letting him examine the cut. Thankfully, it was not deep and didn’t require serious medical attention. A simple bandage would be enough for this. He picked her up carefully and walked over to a chair, setting her down and grabbing a bandage.
“What were you doing, [Name]? You should be in bed.” he spoke, carefully cleaning the cut on her hand, his touch was gentle and comforting. [Name] sat on the chair, sniffling a little to keep her tears back.
“I-I just, I wanted to b-be strong like you and t-the other demons. I want t-to protect you from t-those Pillars.” Everything stopped for Muzan when she said that. She wanted to protect him? Normally, anyone who so much as suggested that he was incapable of protecting himself would be eliminated without hesitation but to hear [Name] say it, it made his chest swell with a sense of pride.
Muzan could no longer deny that he did love this girl as a father would love his daughter but [Name] was human, she was fragile. The fact that she was still just a child only made her that more delicate, if anyone needed the protection it was her, not him. He had thought on a handful of occasions of giving her a sample of his blood to transform her into a demon but there were two problems with this:
One, she was still far too young. Her body was weak and delicate like a flower, all too easy to be damaged and ruined by the world around her. If he would allow her to become a demon, he would wait until she was old enough to. He would not take away her childhood for it.
Two, there was always that tiny chance that his blood would kill her. No, not just kill her, it would destroy her cells and leave her as nothing but a puddle of blood and melted flesh. The mere thought of that happening to her made his chest clench with pressure. He could not allow that.
So, he would wait. He would wait until she was old enough to understand all of this more, and give her the chance to become stronger. He will train her himself. He would have the Upper Moons train her as well. He will ensure with every possibility that she will become a strong human and then there was a better chance she would survive the transformation and become a powerful demon. But until that day, she was his to protect and he will fight every single Pillar and Demon Slayer to the death to protect her.
#muzan#muzan kibutsuji#kimetsu no yaiba#muzan x reader#muzan kibutsuji x reader#kimestu no yabia x reader#demon slayer#demon slayer x reader
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[OM!] All Demon Brothers + Undateables as Babysitters (Part 1)
Scenario: For the sake of the exchange program (probably), the entire cast is now in charge of taking care of kids ranging from infants to pre-K children at a daycare with you. Headcanons on what type of babysitter they would be + whatever cute shenanigans that may occur
Note: Baby fever!! Inspiration is the entirety of Gakuen Babysitter/School Babysitter. It is literally the cutest anime I have ever watched in my life and I highly recommend it if you want a cute feels-good, slice of life!! Some of the kids I may have based off of them, but you don’t need to watch it to understand this! :))
why do i always make my headcanons so long
Part 1 has the 7 Demon Brothers
[Part 2] has all five Undateables
--
Lucifer
This was probably Diavolo’s idea so he has no choice but to go along with it, much to his dismay
He already thought humans were fragile, and now they were going to take care of the smaller, younger ones?
His face scares 90% of the kids on his first day as a babysitter, which kind of hinders his job because every time he tries to help them clean up or change diapers, the kids start crying
The other 10% who are not intimidated by him claim him to be the Big Bad and play fight with him all the time, and considering his attitude, he’s a pretty perfect villain in their make-belief play so he’s won their hearts IMMEDIATELY
Generally a pretty strict baby-sitter who is listened to without having to repeat himself; his power and authority is unyielding (and also he’s just plain scary even if he doesn’t mean to be, and lowkey he likes the power he has because the kids remind him of Mammon sometimes)
It’s honestly a big debate whether he should just give up and ask for help or power through, but if he’s just babysitting with you, pleads with you to please help him because he’s so lost and why do they scream so loud and not that he would ever admit to it, but he is a tiny bit hurt that he can’t seem to have the kids trust him
Once he’s told that he should smile more and speak more gently, he implements it with mixed results (at first), but it’s a significant improvement from the first few days
During a moment of rest, he’s sighing when a baby crawls up to him and sits in his lap without warning, and he’s a goner
Literally has the hardest time trying to train his face not to look so pleased or happy, but his smile is so soft (and he will not hesitate to kill any of his brothers that see him like that, but for you and the undateables, he’ll just be embarrassed)
Loves infants and how trusting they are of him despite how scary his face may seem sometimes-- the epitome of unconditional love and he’s just… very tender
Probably ends up being the respected babysitter who’s super cool to all the kids but slightly unapproachable (unless you’re a babyyyy) but eventually climbs the ranks in terms of babysitters because he vouches for them if they do need him
Mammon
The kids have decided that he is the biggest kid on the playground and now to assert dominance, they must beat him up
Which is what they do-- or as much as they can with their tiny fists and miniscule strength and the fact that Mammon is a literal demon
You just stare at Mammon as he cries on the ground, whining at how the kids ganged up on him and you’re just like…. They’re literally <4 years old.
Despite that part, Mammon gets along with all the kids really well!!
He talks to them as normal and calls them ‘brats’ but they all know he’s soft for them so they kind of take advantage of that? But only a little bit because they don’t like seeing Mammon cry either
You forget who comfort the other more at this point, the kids or Mammon
Mammon is the best person to call for if the kids want to play around because he’s pretty animated himself and goes along with whatever the kids want to do
You might have to reign them in a little yourself, because you’re not quite sure Mammon really knows what’s actually dangerous for them
“Mammon, please only carry one kid at a time please, you’re scaring me”
“Huh? You know I can carry all four of them on my head--”
“Please”
Suuuper popular with the kids even though he kept complaining about them to anyone who would listen that he had to look over these tiny humans
But the moment any of the kids ask for his help or do something cute, he’s the FIRST one to go and help because ‘you need the GREAT Mammon’s help? Guess you can’t help it after all…” and he just likes the fact that he feels reliable to these kids
He might… actually save money to buy these kids Christmas gifts?? Will maybe cry if they bring little Valentine's Day candies (that their parents probably told them to give but shhh let him dream)
Leviathan
May or may not be hyperventilating as he hypes himself up to go into the daycare and meet the kids
He tried to brush it off to his brothers that they’re just kids and he doesn’t care if they like him or not because it doesn’t matter to him because he’s just an otaku-- but my god he hopes they like him
Little does he know, the fact he lets them play on his game consoles (whether or not they actually know how to play) wins them over immediately and breaks the ice
They find him super interesting to talk to and he ends up a pretty popular babysitter because he talks to them like adults (yes, even to the babies)
Catch him giving a bottle to a baby while talking to them in baby-voice (that he adopts not on purpose) about his favorite TSL season
One of the biggest reasons why the kids love him is because he really listens to them even though their rants and blabbing doesn’t always make sense
When he does talk about his interests (or it slips out, as it does), the kids are genuinely interested in what he has to say and that’s when his mission to convert all of these kids to watching anime and reading manga started
“Reading manga is going to help them develop reading comprehension!!”
Probably brings his entire stash of (kid-friendly) manga-- probably the magical girl anime with Ruri-chan-- and has the kids dig in
It does have some negative repercussions because kids aren’t exactly good at handling precious material, so things do rip and break and Levi had to excuse himself to go outside and mourn his lost
But the fire of his mission burns brighter than the sadness over what he has lost (besides, he would never bring limited edition/1st edition things outside his room so these things are replaceable)
If Halloween rolls around, the kids will exclaim that they want to be [insert character] from TSL or another anime and Levi may shed tears of happiness right there and then
Will make it his side quest to make costumes for ALL the kids-- especially if they can’t afford their own and will encourage them to be whatever they want to be!!!
He’s literally leading an army of newly-created weebs/otakus that look up to him in the daycare and the power he has over these kids is so formidable some of his brothers are actually a little jealous HAHA
Satan
Acts casual about the whole thing and is actually casual about it
He hasn’t necessarily spent much time with kids, but he figures he’d be able to do it-- and he’d be right; considering how natural he is with people in general, I doubt kids would be much different, especially if he talks to them like adults and respects their opinions
Is definitely the type of babysitter some of the kids end up having a little baby crush on, considering how charming and prince-like he can be with his gentle tone of voice
Not that he’s perfect-- some kids are just brats and he does get angry at them but he only needed to snap once before the troublemakers all learned not to mess with him
Despite that, he would most likely be the ones to keep an eye on the troublemakers, because it may be a sign of a troubled home (not always, but… well, he would know best, wouldn’t he?) and he’d want to reach out to them if he can help them in any way
What he loves to do with the kids-- and you can probably guess-- is have Story Time!!
The kids are so excited to circle around him before naptime and listen to him read storybooks, doing voice overs and dramatic/animated readings; the kids are so intently listening and giggling at the funny parts
At first, he attempted to bring all his books over to the daycare, but he had to put some back when you tell him these kids are literally three and probably don’t have the reading comprehension required to read Quantum Physics-- so he provides picture books instead; anything he procured from the human world
Really encourages the kids to try their best to read and, if he has the time of day, tries to teach them basic things like the alphabet, how to spell out each words etc (you may call him…. Sensei)
Adores their imagination too because he knows adults could hardly compare at times and he encourages them to make up their own stories and he’d help them write it down
Uses a lot of tactic like these to encourage their education and their development-- he loves books and the impact they’ve made on him and he wants these kids to be able to experience the same things
Asmodeus
A little hesitant at first because kids can be super cute and great for pictures but… they can also be super gross and kind of mean; and he’s seen both ends of the spectrum so he’s not really sure what to expect
Then one of the kid compliments his hair clip shyly and shows their own similar hairclip and he’s sold because obviously they have the cutest kids in the world
Hair undone? He’s there
You wanna try out painting nails? Oh hun, he’s got you-- free make-overs for EVERYONE-- except maybe the infants, he doesn’t wanna ruin the natural baby smell and softness they have going for them
He wants to encourage ALL the kids to express themselves so he sometimes brings old clothes he doesn’t wear anymore so they have a fashion show/runways
ALWAYS encourages the kid to wear what they want because gender norms who???
If ANY and I mean ANY parent comes up to him and talk about him letting them wear non-gender conforming clothes he WILL go off on them because they are LITERALLY KIDS-- let them express themselves and have fun
Kinda grossed out by snot and diapers tho so you’re gonna have to help him with that; and since the universe knows that he hates getting dirty, he’s probably the brother most likely to get peed on while changing a diaper
You have to force him back into the daycare after that incident because he refuses to come out of the bathroom after changing into clean clothes
But he is so captivating that the kids usually don’t cause trouble when he’s around, and also similarly to Levi, he talks and listens to them blabber while he’s doing their hair so it’s always pretty soothing
Probably ends up in charge of the creativity hour and cooing over everyone’s art project, encouraging them to sprinkle as much glitter as they want, use as many colors as they want-- as long as it makes them happy!
Beelzebub
Considering he’s the sweetest and physically the strongest, he’s actually pretty concerned about hurting them, and asks you to help him adjust to this new role so that the kids will be okay (you know he’ll be fine, but if saying yes to helping him will make him feel better, you say it)
Beel keeps to himself as a babysitter for the first few-- oh idk-- hours before some of the kids figure out how STRONG he is and he’s the best thing since sliced bread
The kids start to literally hang from him, testing how strong he really is, and are all delighted that he can hold all of them in and from his arms; he’s a little worried he’ll drop them, but since the kids are so excited about it, decides to lift them only a little high just to please them
Happily, he eventually gets used to knowing how to deal with them, and it helps that the kids are so polite to him
He’s the ultimate Big Brother figure to them, much to his surprise since he’s used to being the younger brother, and it makes him really soft inside that these kids actually look up to him and rely on him
During free play, he has definitely carried at least six kids on his back when they play horsey and not break a sweat and throws the babies up in the air playfully (and carefully) and let them pretend they were flying
He’s their protector, making sure that they’re playing safely, even though he went a little too ham on the protection, grabbing a kid by the scruff of his collar because he was running and beel was afraid of him falling and scraping his knees
“It’s okay Beel, they can handle it--”
“Are you sure?? But they’re so tiny and fragile--”
Changes diapers pretty handily after the first time; has definitely tried the baby formula and ate the entire bottle by accident before feeding a baby
Makes sure the kids are nice to each other, especially siblings, and that they eat; you tell the kids that if they eat their vegetables they’ll grow as strong as Beel, and that’s the FASTEST you’ve ever seen picky kids eat them in your LIFE
Belphegor
“Alright, nap time, everyone!”
“Belphie, they just arrived;;;”
Honestly just thought this entire thing was a hassle because kids in general take a lot of work and he just doesn’t want to put that sort of effort into something he didn’t sign up for
But since you’re there, he may as well try to be proficient enough to be well-liked enough to not cause a fuss and be able to babysit with you
He’s the type of babysitter who converses with the kids and pretends he doesn’t know something so the kid tries to teach him-- and honestly this give the kid a chance to be confident in their skills and also lets Belphie not do as much work to keep the conversation alive so win-win
As you can probably guess, is definitely in charge of enforcing nap time… by napping with the kids-- gotta learn by example right?
There are probably mats that the kids lie on but whenever Belphie lies in the middle of them, they all end up rolling and curling near his side; when he wakes up he’s always surrounded by a sea of kids and he’s so confused and he can’t move unless you wake up the kids for him
The most efficient babysitter out of all of them because efficiency means less effort and time taken to change a diaper, clean up a spill, or wipe a kid’s nose
Doesn’t understand why the kids keep wanting to interact with him but he’ll always indulge them in the end regardless of his nonchalant attitude
He actually finds a lot of them endearing when they talk about the things they like to do and about their daily life because it’s always interesting to learn about their perspective on things
When it’s creativity hour, the kids like asking him to doodle something on their paper (it can be a small chibi or caricature or just some animal) and it always makes them super happy; you watch him crack a smile as he sees the kids try to copy his drawing right next to it
If any of them are interested in stars, will gently show them the constellations in books and watch as they fascinate over them as he did before
#obey me#obey me headcanons#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphegor#School Babysitters#last post for the day#i need to focus on hw HAHAHA#very indulgent hcs
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Zelda Spellman x Fem!Reader x Madam Satan: Little Witch
Summary: You’ll stop at nothing to ensure the safety of your loves. Not even Hell can drag them away.
A/N: So this was originally in response to a request, before I realized they hadn’t watched caos s4 yet. So, merry inauguration day, you get another fic! I hope you all like it! Also... damn Y/N... how come you get two milfs??
Warning(s): CAOS S4 Spoilers, Minor Violence
“Hilda, where is Y/N?”
Zelda walked into her office, intent on seeing you working on Academy business. Instead, her sister was in your chair. Head buried in documents she didn’t understand. She had tried though, for your sake.
“Oh, Zelds! She just popped out for a bit. Needed some fresh air.” Hilda said, giving an overly large smile. Zelda just raised an eyebrow.
“Hilda.” Zelda said in warning.
The younger of the two let out a sigh. In truth, you were supposed to be back over an hour ago. You’d just meant to pop out and check on Lilith and Adam. Apparently the two of you had different opinions on what ‘popping out’ meant.
“She said she was going to check on Lilith and little Adam… again.”
There was a beat of silence, before it was filled with a loud, annoyed sigh. Since Adam had been born, you’d been neglecting your duties to spend time with the baby. You said you were doing it to give Lilith a break, but both Lilith and Zelda knew that the boy had you wrapped around his finger.
She took a long drag of the cigarette in her hand. Of course she wouldn’t fault you, she loved to see you happy. But the Academy relied on you. She relied on you.
“I’ll be back.” Zelda said.
She turned on her heel and marched from the room. Destination: Lilith’s room. Each step, each click of her heels, punctuated by a drag of her cigarette. The nicotine alleviated some of the agitation.
She barged in the room. No knocking, no announcement, nothing. Her gaze leveled on you.
“Y/N Y/L/N!” Zelda snapped.
You jumped slightly, careful to hold onto Adam tightly. Though he whined.
“Hi, Zelda,” You smiled, “Did you come to see Adam too?”
No traces of guilt lingered around you. Only complete love and bliss, having your two lovers and the baby in one space. Your heart was full.
“Well, no. I came here because you’re meant to be handling Academy paperwork and instead, you’ve snuck off to play happy family. We don’t have the time for distractions.”
Zelda’s tone was severe, but not as severe as it could have been. She purposefully softened it. While she needed to stress the importance of the matter, she didn’t want to hurt your feelings. You were practically glowing.
“And you,” Zelda began again, rounding on Lilith, who’d been silent, “It never crossed your mind to remind her of her duties? You know the stress we’re under here.”
“No, it was never a thought.” Lilith said lightly.
“Funny. It didn’t take the millenia you’ve been alive to rot your brain, it took a baby and a witch.” Zelda snapped.
“My brain is in tip-top condition, Zelda. Maybe I just like watching our darling Y/N play mommy.”
Zelda glared daggers at Lilith, while Lilith smirked. It was too easy to get under her skin. Meanwhile, you were blushing like a tomato, dividing your attention between the infant in your arms and your lovers.
“Be careful, witch. You live under the roof of my academy, lest you forget.” Zelda warned. Lilith’s smirk dropped.
“You know what happens if I leave this building.” Lilith said, fear creeping into her voice.
“Mm. How horrible.” Zelda’s tone was dry, her glare unwavering.
“Zelda!” You gasped, making both of them look at you. You looked heartbroken at the horrible way they were speaking to one another, “That was cruel!”
Zelda had the decency to look ashamed. She had been falling back onto the habit of throwing harsh words when she was stressed. Of course she’d been making an active effort to change that habit, but it was second nature when emotions ran high.
You and Lilith both knew she didn’t mean what she said when she was upset, but it was still hurtful. Especially with Lilith in such a vulnerable position.
“Now I want both of you to apologize to one another.” You declared.
Both witches spluttered, looking outraged at such a suggestion. Too prideful were they, to admit when they’d done wrong.
“Why should I apologize? She is the one throwing threats around!” Lilith protested.
“Zelda is right. You shouldn’t have kept me distracted from my duties.”
Against her pride, she knew that you were right. You did have important duties that needed attending to. Though, she considered herself one of the most important things in your life. She’d just been enjoying the company and hadn’t wanted you to leave.
“I… apologize for my words, Lilith. They were unfairly severe.” Zelda apologized, voice strained.
“And I apologize for distracting Y/N further.” Lilith conceded.
Your face lit up at the apologies. They were awkward, but they were detailed and somewhat honest. It was progress.
“Thank you for being civil.” You smiled, walking to place a kiss on each witch’s cheek.
Both leaned into the affection openly. Though they’d deny it, they were both big softies when it came to you. You broke through the walls of false bravado. Something in your smile, in your heart, made you irreplaceable.
You placed a gentle kiss on Adam’s forehead, handing him back to Lilith carefully. She gave you a questioning look.
“I should get back to my duties. Zelds, why don’t you stay and relax?” You suggested brightly.
“I couldn’t-“ She argued.
“You absolutely can. You do more for this Academy than anyone. Now take a break.”
You pushed her into one of the many chairs in the room and pecked her lips. Lilith glared enviously. Though you didn’t notice, as you took your leave from the room. You weren’t looking forward to the paperwork. If it gave Zelda a break, then that was enough motivation for you.
Hilda was still in the office and you gave her an apologetic smile. She just waved it off and the two of you got back to work, until she decided to brew the both of you some tea, setting it down in front of you.
“You are a goddess-send, Hilda.”
“Oh, well thank you.” Hilda said, smiling happily, “Just happy to help out where I can.”
“You’ve been more than enough help. Please, go rest. I can manage.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m positive. Rest well and tell Doctor Cee I said hello.”
Hilda collected her things before taking her leave. It left you with an empty office, silent save for the scratching of your pen. Sometimes you enjoyed the lack of noise like this. However, in moments when you wanted to spend time with the people you loved, it felt lonely.
Your mind drifted, filling with daydreams and memories. The afternoon you’d spent cooing over little Adam as Lilith watched on fondly. His eyes looked back at you with mischief, much like his mother.
Zelda had yet to build much of a relationship with the infant. She seemed to hesitate, like she was afraid of getting too attached. You didn’t understand the fear. Lilith wasn’t going anywhere if you could help it. But you knew she would take it at her own pace.
You raced through about half of the papers on the desk when the doors burst open, a haggard looking Prudence standing there.
“Prudence? Is something the matter?” You asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Asmodeus has returned,” She said, in between heavy breaths, “He’s demanding access to Lilith or he'll destroy the Academy completely.”
Your gaze hardened. Slowly and quietly, you stood from your seat, looking at the girl. She looked concerned. Even frightened. Few had ever seen you truly angry.
“Take me to him.” You requested softly.
“With all due respect, Miss Y/N, he’s a king of hell… Are you sure you want to deal with him alone?” Prudence asked.
“The kings of Hell are nothing but overconfident fools. They best me in nothing but age. I’ll be fine.”
She didn’t have the confidence to argue with you. This attitude coming from you was something foreign, something unknown. She knew to tread lightly and did as you asked.
Walking through the halls, you wondered if you’d made a mistake. You knew the kings of Hell weren’t as powerful as they said. Would you be enough to best them? They couldn’t take Lilith or Adam from you. You’d sooner die.
Asmodeus was waiting outside the door at the bottom of the steps. His hands were laced in front of him and he offered a lecherous smirk, looking you up and down. You resisted the urge to shudder.
“And who might you be?” He asked, tone condescending.
“I speak for the Order of Hecate. Now state your business.” You said coldly.
His face twisted up unpleasantly. Like he’d been hit with something you couldn’t see, though you knew that wasn’t the case. His pride had been hit. Not his physical form.
“You’ll be careful how you address a King.” Asmodeus warned.
“I worship no king, and certainly not you - if you were one. Now state your business or leave this place.” You spat viciously.
There was a reason you’d stayed away from Hell as much as possible. When Lilith had been in Hell for so long, you’d seen her anywhere but the infernal realm. It made your skin crawl to deal with such men. They were leeches. Scum of the lowest, most vile degree.
Upon your words, you watched as the king’s face lit up with recognition. A twinkle of something cruel in his eyes.
“I remember you,” He said with a slow, sickening smile, “You’re the one fucking Lucifer’s whore.”
You wanted to flay him where he stood. To decimate him in the most painful manner in all the realms. Instead, you bit your tongue. If you did so, he would win. Unfortunately though, he took that as an invitation to continue.
“Or is it the traitorous Spellman you bed each night?” Asmodeus asked, though it was clear he knew the answer, “Oh! That’s right. Both. I would say it comes as a surprise, but they were both quite willing to get on their knees for Luci-“
“Enough.” You demanded, voice shaking.
“Oh, did I strike a nerve, little witch?”
With a flick of your wrist, the demon was forced to his knees and bound with chains of Damascus steel. You used your other hand to slowly restrict his airflow. The way he gasped and writhed, searching for any breath of air, filled you with satisfaction.
Prudence gasped behind you. Your merciless actions took her by surprise, though she was intrigued as well. She was stunned above all things.
“You, Asmodeus, are nothing but a thorn in my side. And so is your Lord Lucifer. Neither of you are to step foot on the Academy grounds, or I will destroy you both myself.”
If it had been anyone else, Asmodeus might have called it a threat. But the hard anger in your eyes told him that it wasn’t a threat. It was a promise.
You finally released your block on his airways and body, making him pitch forward and gasp heavily. He was trying to breathe in more air than his lungs would hold.
“Y-You will r-rot, witch.” He choked out.
“So will you. Now go.”
He didn’t need to be told twice. In a flaming ring of fire, he was gone, back to the infernal realm he’d come from. There was a heavy silence for a few moments as you and Prudence let the weight of the situation settle. She looked at you curiously.
“What will you do if they come back?” She asked.
“I’ll do exactly as I promised.” You answered.
With that, you turned on your heel, making your way back into the Academy. And back to that dreaded pile of papers.
———
“Excuse me, you did what?” Zelda snapped over the dinner table the next night. You winced.
“I told Asmodeus in no uncertain terms that I’d kill him before he touched Lilith.” You said slowly.
“Y/N, he is a millennia old, infernal king,” Lilith said, sharing a concerned glance with Zelda, “He will come for you.”
“Then let him. I had him on his knees once, I can do it again just as easily.”
“I beg your pardon?” Lilith asked.
“She had him bound and was suffocating him.” Prudence said as she walked in the room, handing a folder to Zelda.
The folder was the least of her concern though. Her eyes widened, mouth open in shock as she stared at you. Lilith had a similar expression of surprise. Though she was better at toning her emotions down.
“You… You had complete control over Asmodeus? One of hell’s three kings?” Lilith said.
“What, like it was hard?” You asked with a roll of your eyes, “I should have just killed him. Unfortunately, he needed to deliver the message for me.”
Zelda and Lilith looked at you, then at each other, then back at you. Words escaped them completely. You had no idea what you’d done and how few had the power to do such a thing.
They thought about telling you. Trying to make you understand. But they decided to push it off, for now.
“Thank you, for protecting me so fiercely.” Lilith murmured, pressing a kiss to your lips. You smiled brightly.
Zelda pressed a kiss to your cheek, before going back to work. Leaving you and Lilith to care for Adam until she came to bed. Later you could talk of serious matters. For now, you were spending time with your family.
#zelda spellman#lilith#madam satan#zelda x lilith x reader#madamspellman x reader#caos#caos imagine#chilling adventures of sabrina#chilling adventures of sabrina imagine#caos x reader#wlw#wlw imagine#jan2021#multimilfswritings
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