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sinner-as-saint · 4 years

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Power Over Me - 6

Bucky Barnes x Reader AU

Previous Parts

Run-through: CEO James Buchanan Barnes is a dominant. And he’s spent the last 5 years searching for his perfect submissive. Then one night, he finds you. He thinks everything will fall perfectly into place now; but he thought wrong. Turns out your unfortunate past which still haunts you to this day, and some of his enemies are, well, connected. Things go wrong. And your bond with your dom is tested in many ways…

Themes throughout the series: dom/sub dynamic, smut, dirty talk, angst, fluff, soft dom!bucky

a/n: *sigh* and here we are! This is the last part of the Power Over Me series. Thank you to everyone who loved and supported this series. And thank you for loving soft dom!bucky as much as I did! I love you guys!

3 months later, you found yourself in a much better place.

You were in a much better mental space than you were on the day you left Bucky’s house. You weren’t broken in pieces anymore. You were healing just fine.

The memories still hurt. The betrayal and the lies hurt. And the heartbreak did as well. But none of those even came close to how much your heart hurt when it missed Bucky. You were hurt, but you still loved him. He had changed your life after all, he had gotten you out of a bad place. He showed you how to love again, how to trust. He catered to all your needs. He protected you.

He made you feel safe. But he also lied. And you found out in the most terrible way possible. After that day outside your work building, you never saw Thor again. Guess he had made a mess and had left your life for good this time – and you were thankful for that last part.

That evening, when you packed up some basic things and left Bucky’s house, you went straight to find a hotel room for the night. You still had your amazing job and enough money in your bank account to find a new place. A couple of hard and long days filled with tears later, you found yourself in a cozy little, not too expensive apartment, not too far from work.

You settled in just fine. You did contact the club and asked them if Bucky came by, looking for his money back. And they said no. You did try to pay them their money back still, in the fit of rage and heartbreak that you were in, but they refused to tell you how much he had paid for you initially and they didn’t want anything to do with you anymore. So you had no other choice than to let it go and forget about the club like it was a bad dream.

You settled into your new place over the week, and then Friday night in the first week you heard a knock at your door. You were in the shower so it took you a minute to get to the door. When you finally opened the front door however, you saw nothing but a folded piece of paper on the ground, and no one else was in sight.

Curious, you picked it up and closed the door behind you again. You opened the note and saw that it was in Bucky’s handwriting. Asking you to meet him at the bistro you always went for dinner on Friday nights. It had become a little ritual of yours.

You felt a pang in your chest.

You tore the paper apart bit by bit and then threw it in the trash. Then broke down crying on the floor. Why would he reach out if his love was fake and just for show? Why wouldn’t he just let you be? You loved him, despite how wrong his actions had been. But you didn’t go that night. Instead you curled up in your bed and let your tears fall until you fell asleep.

From then on, each Friday night, at around the same time you’d receive a knock on your door. And you’d open and you’d find a note on the floor at your door. Sometimes you’d open to see what it said, other times you just threw them all in the trash without even opening it.

It was always the same message. Asking you to meet him at the bistro. After the first month, you began questioning yourself. Should you have given him a chance to explain himself before you left that night?

Life went on. By the second month, you were back to being yourself again. You had friends, and you went out each weekend and had fun. Each time you were out though, you always kept an eye out for a tall man with dark hair and blue eyes. You often wondered, what would you do if you ever came across Bucky casually and unexpectedly on the streets one day?

Would you stop and listen to what he has to say? Would you pretend he’s just another face in the crowd? Or would you just glare at him and move on? Besides, why was he still trying? Couldn’t he see you didn’t want anything to do with him anymore?

Okay, that was a lie. You died a little each time you heard the knock at your door each Friday night. You couldn’t fight the need to be with him, despite how pissed you were. You wanted nothing more than to just be in his arms again. Or have him hold you in his bathtub again, and kiss you and tell you there’s nothing to worry about because he’s there for you.

Oh you missed him.

Three months passed this way. Each Friday night you would receive the note – which you tore apart. And you thought that as time would go by, all of it would hurt less. It did. But as time went on, you missed Bucky more and more.

Until one day you hit your limit. That’s it, I’m going to that bistro.

You walked in through the doors and the memories came flooding back in. One of the main reasons why you and Bucky used to love this place is because it was very lowkey and quiet. Never crowded and it was very cozy. The little bell rang above you as you walked in.

You scanned the place, your heart racing and then you were sure your heart skipped a beat once you finally saw him. Bucky, in the furthest corner of the room.

He looked at you like he was witnessing a miracle. He was indeed, he had been trying for three months to get you to talk to him. He called when you first left, then you blocked his number after the first try. Then he had his people look for you because he was miserable and he had forgotten how to live without you. He ended up finding the address to your apartment, but he didn’t want to be pushy, or invade your privacy too much. So he figured a handwritten note would do.

Little did he know that three months later, the little note would in fact bring you to him. He was blown away when he saw you walk in. Little brown, body hugging dress, a tan coat, boots – simple but enough to make him want to get on his knees and beg you to come back to him again.

He noticed your hair was longer, it looked great. You wore red lipstick now, you never used to before.

“Bucky.” you were conflicted as you greeted him as politely as you could. There was a pain in your chest. Was it a wave of nostalgia or was it just your heart swelling up with happiness now that you’ve finally met the man you loved?

Hi baby… “Y/N, hi.” He stood up and walked over to pull back your chair for you, like he always did no matter where you went.

You sat down and watched him as he took a seat right across you. He had waited three months for this, he didn’t want to waste any more time. So he got right to it.

“I know you’re hurt. I just need to you listen to me, and then you can… leave if you want to. But I deserve a chance to explain myself.” He spoke, looking down at his folded arms on the tabletop. Okay, he did deserve one chance.

Only upon hearing his voice did you realize how much you had truly missed him. He looked, just as broken as you were. His hair was a little longer, curlier. His eyes were the same, just more tired. His facial hair seemed a little not so well groomed. But he looked good nonetheless.

“Okay. Go on.” You kept your replies short because that lump in your throat wouldn’t let you talk anyways.

He took a deep breath and began. “I’m sorry.” He paused. “I should apologize because what I did was wrong, and you didn’t deserve to find out that way. I should’ve been open and honest about it.” his words brought you back to that first discussion you had in his study that one night. “But my intentions weren’t as petty as you were made to think.”

You were quiet.

He shook his head slightly, thinking back on everything. “I was scared to tell you about the… deal I made with the club. I was scared because you were the most perfect thing in my life. And I was completely in love with you and I couldn’t risk losing you. I needed you way too much. Still do.”

He looked up to find you looking down at your lap. He continued. “When I saw you that night, at the club, I didn’t know you had been involved with Thor before, as his sub. I found out later, when you told me.” This made you look up at him.

Oh.

He continued. “When I saw you that night I… my whole world changed. You were everything I was looking for. And I knew I had to take you home and keep you safe. I had to save you from that place, and from men like Thor.” He paused again, and exhaled loudly. “I never brought you home to show off to him, or as a trophy or whatever the hell he told you.”

His voice was calm still. Sincere, and he hoped to make you see his side of the story. Seeing you were still quiet, he continued talking. “Y/N, I love you. I love you more than I could ever put into words. And I’m sorry for not telling you sooner about what I did.” He paused. You couldn’t move your eyes away from his face. Oh Bucky…

“I thought you said we would tell each other things. Every little thing. Then how did you miss this, Bucky?” you spoke up finally. He hung his head low in shame. “This would’ve hurt much less if you had told me the truth on day one, rather than me finding out through Thor after I spent months loving you. Why did you have to hide such a thing?”

…I spent months loving you… “I was scared. I was scared that you would leave me. And back then I thought that when you do find out the truth one day, you would at least give me the chance to explain myself. Instead you just took off.” He sounded hurt. Then again, so were you.

You sighed, inching forward and making sure to keep your voice down. “I took off because I was heartbroken. And because I’ve been in that situation before where a man bought me and then fed me lies, I-,”

He cut you off. “I didn’t feed you lies! I-,”

You cut him off then. “I’m not done yet.”

He was quiet after that.

“As I was saying, I left because I didn’t know what else I should do. I felt betrayed, Buck. My past hasn’t been easy and you know it.” your words hurt him. “I thought… I didn’t…” you trailed off then took a deep breath and continued, “I couldn’t go through it. Not again. I had just been told that the man I love bought me just to assert dominance over his rival. What would you do, huh?” you waited.

He sighed. “Why did you have to believe him?” he asked, his voice a little shaky.

You scoffed. “I had no other choice. His words made sense at the time, and I was vulnerable and he knew just what to say to break me down. Besides, you had been lying to me, hiding the truth this whole time and Thor, despite being a pure evil person, was the one who told me the truth.” You paused, letting him feel the hurt that you felt that day, three months ago. “I had no other choice but to believe him.”

Bucky was quiet for a little while. Then he spoke up. “Do you forgive me? Don’t I deserve a second chance to make things right?” he asked.

You did forgive him. He did deserve a second chance. But…

You sighed. “Buck, if I go through something like that again, it will kill me.” You referred to the heartbreak.

Bucky reached out and grabbed your hand and held it in his. This was the first time in three months that he touched you, and it nearly made his eyes water. Fuck, he missed you. “Babe, this is you and I we’re talking about. You and I have a special bond.” He looked you right in the eyes as he spoke. “You are the love of my life, and nothing will ever change that.” he said, meaning each word. I love you, damn it!

I love you too…

“Buck…” you trailed off, not knowing what to say. You wanted so desperately to hold on to him. You lowered your eyes immediately, fearing you might start tearing up.

He let go of your hand for a brief moment, reached into the inside pocket of his coat and pulled out a long, rectangular box. “Come home. Come back to me, please.” He pushed the box towards you and you knew immediately what it was.

His collar.

Bucky had kept it of course, both the collar and the ring. But he decided not to bring up the ring just yet, one step at a time.

You looked down at the black box with a little bow on it. Your hands itched to touch it. You had missed it, missed having it around your neck. You missed how you used to wear it so proudly – proud that you were his. Bucky’s.

Bucky watched how you hesitated. You didn’t even open the box. Then you looked up at him and he caught the look in your eyes. Oh no…

“Bucky, I, um…” you trailed off, not knowing how to word it properly.

No. No. No. “You found another dom?” he asked, getting protective out of habit. You shook your head at him and sighed.

“He’s not a dom.” You answered. Bucky’s world came crashing down a second time. Oh fuck no…

“Who is he, then?” he asked, not caring of he sounded a little pissed off. How could you… just move on?

You shifted in your seat. “His name’s Steve. I met him recently, through a co-worker.” You answered, taking it slow.

I don’t care. I don’t care. You can’t be with someone else, you’re mine. Bucky’s inner thoughts were haunting him as you spoke.

“I decided to take a break from… all that, and try something a little more lowkey and normal this time. Steve and I are… supposed to be going out tomorrow.” You didn’t know why you felt guilty for saying so.

“Do you like him?” he asked, ready to punch that fucker already.

You chuckled dryly. “I met him once. We’ve been texting and stuff, and I don’t know what you and I are anymore so…” you trailed off. Once you said it out loud, you realized that you didn’t. You didn’t like Steve. No. You loved Bucky. You were just trying to forget him, but you couldn’t.

That’s why you agreed on going on a date with Steve in the first place – to try and forget Bucky, to try and move on. But now that you were here, in front of him with his collar which meant so much to you, right in front of you; you realized that you could never love another man as much as you loved Bucky.

“Oh.” Bucky was hurt and he didn’t even try to hide it. He didn’t know what hurt more; that you rejected his collar, or that you were trying to date other people and didn’t need him as your dom anymore. He chuckled, feeling sorry for himself. “Well, look who’s breaking my heart?” he tried to turn it into a joke but couldn’t.

No. I’m not, I still love you. I love you more than anything, Buck please…

“Bucky, I-,”

He cut you off. “No, it’s okay. You’re not wrong. It’s just that, I thought that you and I…” he trailed off. I thought that you and I would end up together like we promised. I thought we would get married and have a family like I always dreamt of. I thought that I would retire and raise our kids with you, in our home. He couldn’t stay any longer. “I gotta go, I guess.” He got up to leave and you were frozen in place.

Don’t go, I love you. Don’t go. “Bucky, the collar…” you wondered if he would take it with him, or would he just leave it here with you.

He sighed, chuckled and looked down at you. You remained seated as he took a step away from the table, ready to leave. “Throw it away on your way out. I… I can’t keep it.” he swallowed, trying to get rid of the lump in his throat. He instinctively reached out and gently touched your face, grazing your skin with his knuckles. “Thank you for meeting me, and listening to me.”

Then he left. And you didn’t stop him, you were still processing all of it.

---

Bucky spent the entire night and the following day drowning in his sadness, lying on the bed which used to be yours, desperately holding on to all that he still had left of you. He shed tears last night, after he left the bistro. But now, he was just too weak to even cry.

He was broken.

You were in no better shape. After Bucky left, you picked up the collar and made your way to your apartment. You didn’t throw it, you couldn’t. Once you got home, your hands were a little shaky as you put the collar on and stood in front of the mirror.

Oh Bucky… I miss you.

Saturday evening, Bucky heard a knock at the front door. He lazily walked downstairs and opened the door to reveal someone he least expected.

You.

You looked up at him. Red, watery eyes. His sweater was all wrinkled and his hair was a mess. You weren’t in that great of a shape either to be honest. He looked right at you until he finally realized that this wasn’t his mind playing tricks on him. It was actually you.

He wanted to just pulled you inside and give you a tight hug and never let you go again but he waited.

“Hi.” You said, surprisingly, sounding less hurt than you did at the bistro the previous night.

Bucky kept quiet. He frowned a little, remembering clearly that you said you were gonna go out today with what’s his name. “Don’t you have a date to go on to with your little boyfriend?” he sounded like a pissed off, middle aged dad.

You sighed, rolling your eyes and lowering them down because they began watering already. “I met the guy once. He’s not my boyfriend.” You paused and stepped forward just a little. You needed to be close to him so badly. “Besides, I had to come home to you.” you said and it broke him again. But in a good way this time.

You kept your eyes down and continued. “I realized last night that no matter how angry I am, no matter how much I try to move on or forget, no matter where I’ll go, I’ll always need you. I’ll always be yours, because… because I love you, Buck.” you bit your lip and held back a sob.

He couldn’t resist pulling you into his arms any longer. “Baby, come here,” he pulled you inside and closed the door behind you and gave you a tight hug. You wrapped your arms around his torso, tightening your grip around him as you pushed your face into his chest and cried.

“I love you, Buck.” you sobbed. “I love you so much. Please don’t let me go.” Your tears wet his clothes but he didn’t mind. You were here now, you were with him and all was well.

“I know, baby. I love you. And I’m never letting you go.” He cooed, kissing the top of your head. “You’re home now, it’s okay.” He tried to calm you down when he himself held back his tears.

You pulled away to look up at him with tears staining your cheeks. He wiped them all away and gave you a kiss on the forehead. “Don’t worry baby, I’m here.” He cooed and kissed down your damp cheek and down your neck. Then he noticed you were wearing his collar again and something in his shifted naturally. “You’re wearing my collar again.” he noted, holding your chin gently.

You nodded. You hadn’t taken it off since last night to be honest. Bucky gave you a look, one you understood all too well. And just like that, it felt like you two hadn’t spent three months apart.

“Would you want to go to my playroom, Y/N?” he asked, using his dom voice that you had missed so much.

“Yes, sir.” You answered, without hesitation.

And that’s how you found yourself in Bucky’s playroom, cuffed to the big X-cross on the side of the room. He tied each one of your wrists and ankles to each end of the cross. He left your waist unrestrained and something told you he wanted you bound and restrained, but he also wanted to see you squirm. He had you blindfolded and you were left in suspense as he moved around the room.

You could hear him pick up things here and there. You could hear his footsteps getting closer then moving away again.

He finally approached you and gently touched your cheek. Your heart raced in anticipation. “Keep your safe words in mind, Y/N. I will not push your limits too much, however, you will not cum without my permission. Understood?”

“Yes, sir.” Oh how you had missed that voice of his.

“Do you know why you are here, Y/N? Why I’m having to correct your behavior?” he asked again, and this time you couldn’t tell if he was close by or far away because your own heartbeats rang in your ears.

You worded out your answer as best as you could, despite the nervousness and excitement, and impatience. “Because I left, sir. And because I chose to believe Thor and I got carried away by my emotions. I didn’t give you a chance to tell your side of the story. I should’ve trusted you and known that you would never do anything to hurt me, sir.”

Hmm. Bucky toyed with the suede flogger in his hand. Good enough baby, but…

You waited. He didn’t say anything, instead you just received a smack across the chest with what you knew to be the suede flogger. You gasped, not expecting it. It didn’t hurt that much, it tingled around your erected nipples.

“You’re right. But not entirely.” He spoke and you heard him step aside and you knew he went to pick something up. He approached you again. He stepped closer than where he stood earlier. You felt his warm breath right in between your breasts as he kissed his way up to your neck while positioning a plug right at your puckered hole.

You felt the coldness of the lube and the size of the plug as he pushed it more and more inside you. His lips brushed along your throat as he spoke up again, “Those aren’t the only reasons you’re here, Y/N.” pushed the plug further into you. Your body welcomed it in, desperate to fill the void. Any void, by anything. You relaxed your body as much as you could. But Bucky was making it hard.

He nibbled and kissed right at your most sensitive spots along your neck, whispering as he went. “You are here because you didn’t hear me out.” he managed to get the entire toy in you and his hand pulled away from you. But not his lips, they kept trailing along your throat and collar bones as he spoke.

“You’re here because I love you more than anything in this world and beyond. But you ignored all the love I gave you.” he paused, sucking on your skin before letting it go. “You’re here because you dared to even question the love I have for you.” he kissed along your jaw. “You’re here because in the past three months, there wasn’t a day where your memories didn’t torment me until I broke down completely.”

He kissed down to your breasts again. His words and the softness of his lips were making you lose your mind already. “I begged for you to come back. I was on my knees, screaming your name,” he kissed his way back up to your ear and nibbled on your earlobe, “but you never came back to me.” He purposely brushed his lips against your own. “You’re here because you abandoned me when I needed you the most.” He repeated. “I needed you, Y/N, and you weren’t here because you chose to believe a vile person over me.”

You were breathless and needy by the time he pulled away from you. “Sir, I’m sorry…” You whined. And you earned yourself another smack in between your legs by the flogger. You whimpered, you had forgotten about the plug. But the tingles left behind by the flogger reminded you that it was there, stretching you out, filling you up; snug and deep inside you.

Bucky chuckled, lifting his hand up and gently touching your lips with his finger. He circled your mouth, tracing it softly then dragged that finger down your neck, and in between your breasts and down your stomach and finally, he slipped it in between your legs. He toyed with your folds, his finger parting them with ease. You were soaking wet. “Sorry doesn’t make it better.” He whispered. “You were even on the verge of dating someone else, weren’t you?” He approached you, teasing your entrance with his finger. You moaned, squirming already. “Tell me, would you let him to all this to you?” his voice was deeper, dripping with lust.

You were quick to respond. “No, sir. I would not.”

Hmm. He tortured you even more by just gently pressing his finger against your entrance. You squirmed again, whining with your lips parted. “Would you let him touch you?” Bucky’s lips touched your skin again, near your ear where he whispered, “Would you let him please you? And do all the things that I do to you, huh?” he asked, taunting you. He knew damn well no one could ever satisfy you like he could.

“No sir, please...” you begged, whining.

He chuckled again, finally slipping his finger inside you. Then added another, stretching you out at the same time as the plug. Bucky curled his fingers and stroked you gently. You moaned out loud, squirming and tugging onto the cuffs as his brief touch sent electricity coursing through your veins. “You see? Your body remembers me, Y/N. It knows it belongs to me, and no one,” he leaned in closer to your ear, “No one at all, can touch it. You’re mine, you hear me?”

Oh fuck… “Yes, sir.” You were breathless, and you whined in discontent as he removed his fingers from you, mercilessly. Smack. Smack. You felt the suede flogger against your body again, on your stomach and your breasts this time.

“What color?”

“Green, sir.”

You were dripping already, legs shaking with how wonderful the plug felt but also because you craved him. His touch. You received a few more smacks from the flogger, then he got rid of it. He stepped closer to you on the cross again, his lips brushing faintly against your own as he spoke. “Do you know how miserable I was without you?” he asked, catching you off guard with how soft and quiet he sounded. Which was immediately followed by, “Would you like me to show you?”

You gasped, trembling. His words alone made you almost start to moan like a man woman. “Yes, sir.”

He stepped away. You relied on your hearing to make out where he was, or what he was picking up to punish you with. And then you heard it, the buzzing sound of the vibrator. Bucky walked over to you and placed it in between your legs; right on top of your entrance. You whined immediately as it made contact with your body.

The vibrations reverberated throughout your entire body, making you squirm and tug on the cuffs. You threw your head back and whimpered as he wiggled the wand a little and making you whine louder. You felt your body clench around the plug as he teased you.

“I missed you so much.” He said, softly as he pressed the vibrator further against you, mercilessly. Please…please…please you silently begged. “Do you know how that felt?” he asked, his voice calm but taunting. You didn’t answer, you couldn’t focus on anything. You involuntarily moved your body forward; against the vibrator. Bucky noticed, and he lifted the vibrator off you; denying you even a bit of release. You trashed around and squirmed, moaning again. “This is how it felt.” He hissed right in your ear.

You were still recovering from your denial when you felt a loud smack right on your thigh. You recognized that it was his riding crop. You yelped, not expecting it. He trailed the tip of the riding crop from your thigh, up to right in between your legs and gave you a little smack there, making you cry out again before he brought it up all the way to your breast.

“It hurts, doesn’t it?” Smack. You yelped. Bucky stepped closer and tilted your head back and kissed you deeply. More like invaded your mouth like he owned it; pushing his tongue past your lips and stroking the top of your mouth like it was nothing. You whimpered as he pulled away despite knowing you wanted more. “It’s so frustrating to want something so terribly, then just have it snatched away from you so mercilessly, isn’t it, Y/N?”

You earned yourself a spank right in between your legs when you didn’t reply. Your body clenched around the plug again, you moaned wantonly. “Answer me.” He sounded a little more stern.

“Yes it does, sir. Please…” you begged. He didn’t say anything. Instead, you felt the vibrator being pressed against your clit again.

Bucky pressed the vibrator further against your core, making you drip even more and moan louder, making you squirm and making your body beg for him. “I was yearning for you, my little pearl.” He sounded soft and quiet again. His actions anything but. He wiggled the wand around and make you scream louder. “I was alone. Broken and empty. I needed you but you weren’t here.” He moved the toy from between your legs, trailing it up your body, circling your erected nipples with the tip of the wand and then back down to where you craved it the most.

You were sure if it weren’t for the blindfold, you would have tears streaming down your face by now.

“Sir, please… I’m sorry. I should’ve stayed and listened. We could’ve worked it out.” You were breathless and whimpering. Bucky hummed at your response but then kept toying with you.

For quite a while, he kept at it. You begged him incessantly, but he denied you each time. He teased you and denied you your release like he owned your very being. Your pleas were incessant, and wanton. But he still wouldn’t give in. He kept going until your body trembled against the big cross. Until your pleas became incoherent, and your spit trailed down your chin. You were a mess.

He removed the vibrator off your body abruptly, deciding he had messed with you enough. You whined again at the loss of contact. No... please…

“Sir, please…”

You heard him carelessly throwing the wand and the other equipment on the bed before stepping closer to you. “It’s okay angel, I’m here now.”

You felt him kiss his way down your body; starting from your neck all the way down to your legs, where he untied your ankles. He kissed up your thighs again, then pulled the plug out making you squirm. Your wrists were both still cuffed to the cross as he lowered his pants, picked your legs up and wrapped them around his waist. His cock briefly brushed against your wet folds in the process and you whimpered.

“What color, Y/N?”

“Green.” Oh fuck… please.

Bucky had done his waiting, months of it. Now all he wanted was you. To remind you that you belong with him. All he wanted was to hear you scream as he makes you cum around him. So he wasted no time in aligning his throbbing tip to your dripping wet entrance.

He pushed himself into you; stretching you out. His nails digging into your skin as he held you by your hips, as he filled you up like always; making you whine and moan as he went. You were both gasping by the time he filled you up entirely. “You’re mine.” he growled in your ear. “Tell me.” He stayed still, allowing himself to feel your walls clenching around his cock. “Tell me you’re mine.”

You whined. Oh fuck… “I’m yours, sir please...”

Bucky started rocking in and out of you, without wasting any time. You felt all of him; your walls clenched around his thick cock as he started out with slow strokes and then gradually sped up into you. “You’re not going anywhere, you hear me?” he asked. And you nodded pathetically.

You felt all of him, the bumpy and the velvety skin of his length. He felt incredible as he stroked your walls with his pulsating cock. You were a moaning mess in no time. “Promise you’re never gonna leave me.” He hissed, speeding up into you, absolutely fucking you into the wall behind you.

You whined like a desperate brat. “I promise, sir…” you didn’t even know if you made sense anymore. Because in your head you didn’t. All you could think of was his cock, and how well it filled you up. He pushed his head into the crook of your neck and swore under his breath.

He fucked you relentlessly; earning more and more moans out of you each time his cock stroked your walls. You soon felt the familiar pressure forming; pressing inside you as the familiar warmth spread all over your body. You moaned wantonly.

Bucky nibbled at the skin under your ear and you lost all control you had left; your mind a foggy mess. Your clit rubbed against his pelvic bone each time he buried himself completely in you, and he soon quickened his pace; earning even more moans and mewls from you.

He pounded into you as fast as he could. He moaned right into your ear and the sound sent shivers down your back like it always did. “You’re all mine!” he growled again, biting down on your skin.

Your legs started to shake around him as he quickened his pace; pounding into you relentlessly. The pleasure built nicely as he took you higher… and higher… and higher.

“Sir, may I please cum?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. You were so thoroughly fucked out you could barely talk properly.

“Yes, angel. Cum for me, cum all over my cock…” he breathed into your ear. You couldn’t hold back anymore. So, you came undone around his cock; screaming. Walls clenching around him. Bucky’s thrusts became irregular and slower as he came right after you did, cock throbbing against your pulsating walls; moaning out loud when he felt your walls pulsating violently around him, both of you gasping for air.

“I love you, baby.” he said, breathless just as you.

“I love you more.” you responded.

Your mind was hazy from there on. And you were only able to reorient yourself once he pulled you into his lap in the bathtub; both of you surrounded by warm water. And once you did, tears began escaping your eyes again.

“Are you okay, my little pearl?” he asked, tightening his arms around you.

“I’m sorry.” You sniffled, hugging him tighter. He kissed the top of your head.

“It’s okay baby. Don’t apologize. We’ll heal, both of us. And we’re gonna be okay, together.” He cooed, stroking your hair gently. You placed a soft kiss on his chest.

“I was so rash, and unfair.” You argued, softly as you pulled away from his chest.

He smiled at you, cupping your face. “You were angry and hurting, baby. You had every right to be. I messed up by not telling you the truth sooner. I should’ve be honest from the start.” He said, looking you deep in the eyes.

“I should’ve stayed. Just to give you a chance to explain yourself.” you argued back.

He shook his head. “You were protecting yourself from being hurt again. It’s okay, babe. We’re okay, look.” He leaned in to give you a deep kiss, proving to you that there was no hard feeling between you two anymore. He kissed down your neck, gently and you noted that your collar was off again. You smiled.

“I love you, Buck.” you said again. You would say it a thousand time but it still wouldn’t do justice to how much love you had for this man.

“I love you too, baby.” he kissed your forehead. “Tell me something,” he sat straighter with you still in his lap, “When you’re ready, and when we’ve both healed completely, and when I’ve made up for the mess I made,” he paused, “one day, you will marry me, right?”

You chuckled, leaning in to cup his face and kissed him on the nose. “I will.” you hugged him again, tighter this time. “Why do we always have these serious talks in bathtubs?”

He laughed. “I love you so much.” He mumbled against your neck. You said you loved him back, and Bucky could feel his heart healing already. And yours was too. This was all you both needed; each other.

It’s true then, huh. Bucky thought.

There was this thought in his head, which haunted him during the time that you were away from him these past three months. Turns out, it wasn’t haunting him – it was just a reminder. That at the end of the day, he was lost without you. He was incomplete without you. He’d even go to say that he needed you a tad bit more than you needed him.

It’s you, baby. It’s always been you.

His inner voice spoke up again as he held you in his arms in that bathtub, wondering if he’ll ever have enough time in this lifetime to even show you just how much you mean to him. He knew then, that instead of being the other way around all along, it was always you who had power over him.

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes imagine #marvel #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes x you #sebastian stan

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fairestwriting · 3 years

Note

Wait a second! I absolutely adore that hcs where the boys helped mc get together with their vice dorm head. Then, what if its the other way around? 👀 may I request the vice dorm head's crush asking to set them up with their dorm heads now? You can exclude Ortho since well...he's a baby lol. Hehehehe. Thank you! Angst we go~

YEAHHH pain time lets go. im reusing the trey/riddle/reader childhood friend love triangle from that post btw because i liked that one so much. this is once again, So fucking long.

+ if you like my writing, you can buy me a ko-fi to support me!

Trey Clover

Trey was the one who introduced you to Riddle, all those years ago, when you were all just brats running around in the Country of Roses. Since then, the three of you had been pretty much inseparable.

Unlike Riddle, who was more on the reserved side when it came to affection, Trey was rather open with it. People just knew you were close, you spent most of your time off classes together, occasionally joined by Riddle. You all meant so much to each other, it felt like you'd just be together forever, just like this.

But things start to change when you find yourself wanting to be closer to Riddle. You saw him often, but it never felt like it was enough, he wouldn't leave your mind... you were starting to develop serious feelings for him, yet you didn't know what to do about it.

Riddle had become Heartslabyul's dorm leader recently, and he was taking his duties seriously, as seriously as he took everything else. He'd have less and less time for you and Trey, you didn't know how you could get your feelings through to him, who always had his head on his work. It just felt hopeless.

You couldn't handle all the pining anymore, so you decide to ask Trey for help. How could you communicate your feelings to Riddle when he felt so distant? You feel like the only person who could possibly know what to do would be Trey.

You come to him when he's baking by himself, lingering around the kitchen as you beat around the bush for a bit, but eventually spit out that you were in love with Riddle, and didn't know how to confess to him when things were like this. Trey stops his work for a second, surprised once he hears you had fallen for him... but then he looks at you with a smile in his face, and promises to help.

Of course, helping doesn't come without some teasing, but Trey does sincerely want to assist you. He'll ask you questions to understand the situation as well as he could, finding out how you two had been getting along lately.

So you spill all your worries to him, about how Riddle had barely been talking to you recently, how you were worried he’d reject you and it’d ruin your group’s chemistry. Trey takes in your words with an attentive stare, it somehow feels sour to hear them, like an unwanted change. Had he believed the three of you would have the same sort of relationship forever? That seemed so childish, but now that he had to think about this...

When you’re done venting, Trey ruffles your hair and declares you should bake him a tart, with his help of course -- Which is met with confusion, but as he begins getting the ingredients out, he explains how catching Riddle’s attention with something that would get the stress out of him would be a good way to start your confession.

You’re a bit overwhelmed by the idea of doing this now and today, but you go along with him. While you two are making the dessert, you go over what you should tell him. Trey guesses that Riddle’s distance did come from him not doing well lately, and he reassures that you three would still be friends no matter what, even if you got rejected. You were all mature enough to accept things as they are, weren’t you? You shouldn’t let your bond be shaken by something like this.

When you’re done, you have a tart in your arms and a plan in your head, feeling calm. Trey really did know how to help people, he’s such a good friend -- You make sure to tell him that as you hug him tight. Just a couple hours ago you had no idea what to do, now you knew the exact words to use when confessing your feelings to Riddle. You really did owe him one.

Trey just laughs it off as he hugs you back, wishing you good luck and saying he’ll be there for you no matter what. You pick the tart up and turn on your heel to leave, and his smile just dies immediately.

He feels like he’s missed an opportunity he never even really considered, but one might suppose you don’t know what you’ve lost until you’ve had it taken away -- Still, it’s you and Riddle, he can’t go against you. He just hopes you two are happy if you get together.

Jade Leech

Jade knows all of Azul’s friends, and you were no exception. Whether it was because Azul ordered him to keep an eye on you or because he was just curious, even though you didn’t talk much by yourselves, he did know who you were.

Being very observant, Jade’s already caught on to the fact that you liked Azul. It was funny watching you two dance around each other, he might have placed a bet with Floyd on when you’d get together -- But he definitely didn’t expect for you to come to him to ask for help on setting you two up.

That sparks Jade’s interest. You’d think he was suspicious, with how quickly he’s willing to help you, but the proposal just amuses him too much to deny it. He likes putting plans together, he’d been interested in your relationship with Azul, what more could he ask for?

You might not trust him that much initially, even if you came to him for help. It’s easy to be suspicious of Jade, after all, no one can tell what he’s thinking behind that poker faced smile after all. But he assures you that he had nothing to win if he messed up your relationship with Azul, and setting you two up seemed amusing, so he’d do it.

And so, Jade becomes your very own Azul teacher. Jade knows him as well as the palm of his hand, so he’ll explain some of his manneirisms to you, tell you about things he likes that he hides from the public, help you plot dates. He thinks it's cute how excited you get when you feel like you've gotten a new piece to your puzzle.

Early on, he doesn't see you as much more than someone to toy with, honestly. But your reactions are more interesting to watch than anyone else, you have this sparkle to you that sets you apart from other people. And he supposes that's the sort of person who would be good for Azul, yet...

He knows he's getting attached when it feels like the game grows stale. Soon, seeing Azul's rare flustered expressions and your determination paired together as you spent time with each other wasn't fun anymore. He was still helping, but even as he picked your outfit for this date, he can't help but feel jealous. He wants this to be for him.

Jade isn't nice enough that he'll play along until you feel like you've gotten close enough to Azul. No, whether they worked together or not, he wanted you to be his, he's more angry than anguished -- Painfully jealous.

One day, he simply declares that he won't be helping you anymore, cutting your long scheme short. You're shocked, asking why, and Jade tells you that from now on, you'd both be planning your own separate games. You could still try to win Azul's affections, but that would go on as he tried to win yours.

Rook Hunt

Everyone who knew about your crush on Vil had been telling you, he’s way out of everyone’s league, he probably gets thousands of confessions a day, he’s so popular and above this lowly world, one can’t just come up to him and ask him out.

Yet your feelings just don’t go away. You know it’s not some celebrity worship thing, that wasn’t why you got close to him -- Since you noticed how off he seemed to be during the VDC, you had wanted to know the real Vil, and from being a manager to the NRC performance, you two did end up close, and your curiosity was quickly turning into something else, as you caught more glimpses of his off-camera self...

But it all still felt so hopeless. As much as you didn’t want to believe others, you knew what they said held some truth to it, you couldn’t just walk up to Vil and confess your feelings, that wouldn’t work with someone who’s experienced that countless times. You needed to do something special, and you needed to get close to him properly.

You had spent some time thinking about this already, and came to the conclusion you just couldn’t do it alone, you needed help to go near Vil’s heart -- And what better helper than the one who seemed to be his best henchman, Rook Hunt himself? You weren’t all that close to him, but he seemed well intentioned enough, so he’d hopefully at least give you some tips...

You approach Rook at Pomefiore, embarrassed you were doing something like this, but you swallow down all your pride. When you tell him you have a problem you needed his help to solve, he’s already all ears, but when you tell him that it’s about you falling in love with Vil and not knowing what to do about it, it’s like something sparks inside of him.

There’s nothing more beautiful than love, Rook is immediately willing to help you win Vil’s heart. He’s dealt with Vil’s admirers before, but never like this, they just blurted out their feelings to him and didn’t seem capable of playing a longer game -- You, though, were different, and that told him you might just be the one for his oh-so-cold queen.

He’ll ask you about what you had in mind for the confession, what you knew about Vil already, all while taking you out for a walk near the dorm building. You two have a long conversation about Vil, and Rook doesn’t want you to spare a single detail about your feelings, he wants to know precisely and vividly why you’d fallen for him.

You two meet a couple times to talk about him. Rook tells you all the things he knows about Vil, so numerous you feel a little jealous, which he notices. He can’t get enough of all the expressions your emotions cause, you begin to look so radiant for him. A dedicated protagonist, working hard towards achieving the love of someone who seemed so far away from them... it just feels poetic, the thought of you shows up more and more often in his head.

Even though he’s teaching you the ways of a specific type of beauty, he learns that the one you have is even brighter than it. The one thing more beautiful than love is your yearning, it seems, your dedication and determination, the pure dreams you had of just making Vil happy.

The two of you plot an elaborate confession, he’d make sure you’d have a table in the Pomefiore building’s garden just to yourselves, so you could have tea together as the sun sets. You’re counting the days until your date excitedly, confident that you’ll get your feelings through to Vil, and Rook realizes he’ll have to let you go soon.

Oh, he does not want that -- Even if the thought of you in love with Vil was so stunning, the light of it felt like it blinded him. He thinks of all your expressions of affection towards the queen, and he wishes these were towards him, but he knows he has to accept his fate.

When he’s dropping you off at the date location, he kisses your hand and wishes you luck, telling you he’s so happy for you, though he admits that, as shameful as that was, he wishes nothing more than to be Vil right now. Your eyes go wide at the confession, you’re about to apologize, but Rook dismisses it, saying that he really is happy for you, and hopes you’re happy, too. It’s all genuine, just like your wish to win Vil’s affections that made you come to him.

Lilia Vanrouge

You two don't really know each other, at first. Even though you'd been meeting up with Malleus near Ramshackle often for a couple months now, you didn't really have other friends in the Diasomnia dorm -- You didn't tell Malleus about it, but you did find them intimidating.

You were catching some serious feelings for Malleus, though, and he seemed completely blind to every hint you dropped, intentional and unintentional, and desperate times requer desperate measures. You go over all Diasomnia members you knew, and Lilia seems like the most approachable one. You swallow down your unease, and tell him you needed to talk about something.

Lilia, being the decently welcoming person, agrees to meet you away from prying eyes, where you admit that you had been crushing on Malleus for months now, but had no idea what to do about it because he seemed completely immune to any of your hints and flirting. Lilia listens to you attentively, up until the point where you say that you wanted his help on asking him out properly.

He’s honestly surprised at your actions. There’s a sincerity and boldness to them he rarely sees on anyone else, it leaves an impression in his mind. Plus, the idea of Malleus finally being with someone makes him happy, look at him, he grew up so fast! Yeah, he’s definitely up for helping you.

You two talk it out for a while, he asks about what you had been doing to try to catch Malleus’ attention. You explain all the implications you’d been slipping into your speech, all the compliments and the casual touching that made your heart explode everytime you engaged in, but you still did it because you wanted Malleus to know that hey, you liked him. When you’re done spilling your woes, Lilia chuckles, and asks you if you wanted to try doing this in a way he’d understand better.

You don’t know what he means at first, but before you can ask it, Lilia tells you he’d teach you how dragon fae court each other, that would surely get the message through to Malleus! Your eyes go wide at the suggestion, and you immediately agree to it. That’s a plan that wouldn’t fail, right?

And Lilia is nothing if not a good teacher. He takes you to the library to skim books, making sure you have some of the basics about fae culture down before getting to the real stuff. You turn out to be one of his best students, too, you two end up becoming quite the undefeatable pair -- And you become friends, too, your studying sessions are peppered with small conversations about unrelated things.

Lilia just gets fascinated with you. He finds you so interesting to be around, with your willingness to learn and diligence, but he really grows to love the idealistic, sort of hopeless romantic side of you, who was so in love with Malleus and willing to put all this work to make everything go well with him. You just seem so pure, not as in naive, but as in kind and genuine. People like that are surprisingly rare.

When you get to the gift giving portion, the most important one, you’re learning faster than ever, the excitement in your eyes never leaving. Lilia is happy and proud of you -- But when he starts seeing you wear Malleus’ jewelry gifts around, even though he instructed you to do so, he finds himself not liking to stare at it.

He knows himself enough to know what this means, and, really, how stupidly ironic it was. Lilia really did get attached to you while trying to set you up with someone else, this didn’t even feel like something that should happen in real life. It stings, but he goes on with his mission, he wouldn’t just leave things as they were.

Your confession would involve gifting him a gem Lilia got you, one meant specifically for love confessions like these, as he instructed. Your eyes glitter when he puts it in your hands, telling you that now you were ready to actually ask Malleus out -- And with how things looked like, it seemed he was trying to get his feeling through to you too. He’s sure you won’t be rejected, and makes sure you know that.

You thank Lilia, saying you wouldn’t forget how helpful he’d been to you. Lilia smiles and says you don’t have to thank him -- Just make sure Malleus and you are a happy couple, even if he hates to look at it.

You don’t understand what he means with this, but when you’re about to ask, he disappears into thin air, leaving nothing but a glittering trail behind. He never mentions what he’d said again, even when you stay friends after the confession.

#twst #twisted wonderland #disney twst #disney twisted wonderland #twst headcanons #twst imagines #twst scenarios #twst x reader #trey clover #jade leech #rook hunt #lilia vanrouge #trey clover x reader #jade leech x reader #rook hunt x reader #lilia vanrouge x reader #lis writing

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cosmiclatte28 · 3 years

Text

Casual Intimacy (Mark Lee x you)

a/n : it’s my soft hours I guess? I made this sweet Mark Lee imagine (well for me this is sweet. I want a boy like this... if you’re that kind of man dm me 😜)

fluff, no warning, no suggestive content but kisses, and just Mark being a wonderful man for you.

Happy Imagining Mark Lee as your s/o!

People often ask you how you can hold on to your “plain” relationship with your current boyfriend. You seriously do not like them bothering you about your relationship life, but you need to deal with it considering the fact that the man you are dating is the famous Mark Lee of NCT.

He is dorky in camera, and in real life too. You pray day and night to the angels to make sure Mark is not tripping on some random stone or bump a pole. Guess your prayer works, when you see Mark always smiling in front of the camera coping up and working so hard with his endless job.

You yourself work in a famous two Michelin restaurant in Seoul. You’re not going to lie, you met Mark lee on your duty. NCT was holding their debut birthday and you were appointed as the chef to cook for their meal that night. Apparently, Mark Lee was super fascinated by your dish and he requested you to come greet the team when your job in the kitchen is done. Your head cook lets you leave your station once desert is prepared and the plates coming into the washing room is clean.

That was five years ago, Mark Lee got love struck by your simple but attractive persona. His eyes couldn’t leave you as you answer their questions on the dishes and you congratulating them. They’re glad when they learn that you listened to their songs and followed their schedules, just that you don’t have much time to be like the other wonderful fans.

Mark Lee looked so intrigued on you and as you bow to them bidding goodbye, he just returned from the restroom. With his long legs trying to catch his other brothers, Mark happened to slip his number on a piece of tissue paper to your pocket and gave you a genuine smile plus a “thank you”.

You earned a good pay that night and even better, Mark Lee’s number.

Well, he isn’t your bias but come on who doesn’t have Mark Lee in their bias list? Want it or not, conscious or not, Mark Lee is always in the list. So, that night when you finish showering and eating a light midnight snack, you gave the number a shot.

You thought your message will never be replied, maybe Mark will have his phone in silent and only opened up messages from his contact list. You’re lucky when your notification bleeped and from that night both of you learn more about each other.

He kept your number under your name, plain business people say, you also thought maybe he wanted to call you for another dinner party. But the chats he had been sending was far from platonic business. It involves jokes, puns, memories of living in Canada (well you graduated from University of Toronto, but cooking is your passion), and even deeper like late night talks.

The relationship got deeper when Mark Lee called you one night, asking if he can meet you in the restaurant. He said he needed a good meal to write a song he was assigned for. You found no correlation between a good meal and writing a song, but believe it or not, Mark Lee came with one of the hottest selling song that month. Earning him a title of “King of Lyrics”

Since then, he called you again and again when he didn’t have the idea to write. You finally invited him over to your house when you got closer. Mark got to eat in your small dining table with a simple dish that was made with love and care that Mark said tasted better than any other dishes he ever had.

You laughed saying he is exaggerating, but Mark never exaggerates when he is with you.

“Be my girlfriend will you?” he one night asked after you teach him how to cook a proper egg. Despite him succeeding the challenge back in 2020, he still needs practice. He succeeded cooking eggs after knowing you for more than a year.

“Suddenly Mark? After you can make a perfect runny egg?” you giggle but nevertheless nodded your head.

His smile that night was even brighter than when he received any awards and praises. His eyes spark joys and emotions uncaptured by cameras. The world never knows how Mark’s true happy face looks like, but if his world is you, then the world knows!

For the first two year of dating, both of you are keeping it low. Dates happen in your house (your wage is enough to buy you a house). You always cook him foods, tried new dishes to him, earned a lot of complains on how the food is not “suitable for Korean tongue” which you always shrug off because he himself is a mix.

But thanks to his constant brave inputs, your dishes are perfectly blended and well known. News media and TV shows started to cast you in their weekend shows. You were offered a contract of a cooking show in a known broadcasting company.

Mark told you to go for it. He knew how happy you are about cooking, and his faith told him “if that is what was given for you, go for it.”

He was right. The internet loves you, they love your simple but tasty dishes. Your show was ranked the hottest that month, famous for helping college student eat a more delicious food.

NCT even did a special relay cam for it, each group were doing a challenge on following your recipes.

Mark was caught off guard on that live shooting day. His team consisted of him, Ten and Johnny.

And you may guess, things went wrong but in a chaotic fun way. When the three of them are together, they just speak in English and forgot all of the filters they should have.

Mark spilled his relationship when he accidentally said out loud “Of course I know how to do that, my girl has been teaching me that.” Mark boasted when Ten asked if Mark could make the egg benedict for their dish.

Johnny and Ten froze on screen, well the NCT members knew your relationship with Mark but they kept quiet. Mark realized what he has said was recorded and forever lives in the web. The comment section went wild and the fans are thrilled about the “mysterious girlfriend Mark has”.

He eventually spilled the truth on a press conference. You were there beside him when he faced the board director and when he sit in front of different mics and cameras flashes. No one knows but throughout the time, when your heart is beating faster than when you took your SAT and final tests, Mark Lee held on to your hand whenever you are answering a question directed to you.

The magazines are taking the favor of the rising topic, inviting you and Mark to take a photoshoot. When you were insecure about taking a picture with him (who has did countless shoots), he squeezed your arm when walking past you and gave a small proud smile as he went to change clothes while you start your personal shoot. No one saw that, but his quick reassuring squeeze boosted your confidence that day and the couple shoot was very nice! You could print that as your wedding pictures!

When the internet goes wild when they connect the theories and Instagram posts Mark and you both made (fans are the best in deciphering codes!), you now walk through the streets crowded by fans. All asking how is it like to date Mark, but not few also told you to screw off. One day when you both are going back to Canada for a winter break, the fans are crowding the way. You gulped when you have to walk pass them, but Mark looked so used to it. He just chuckled and landed a small hand on the back of your waist. With the manager hyung and bodyguard pushing to make way, you made it through the crowd with confident steps.

On the Christmas dinner, Mark was invited to your family dinner and vice versa. You had to attend their family lunch and to say you were nervous was an understatement.

“Mark, what if they don’t like me?” you asked on your bus ride to his house from the airport.

Mark laughed, he always laughed as his first respond, “Baby, it’s going to be okay. Trust me.”

You snorted, “You calling me baby is already suspicious, for three years we dated you “dude” me 70% of the time, “baby” was only like 10%”

He did the math, “Then what’s the remaining 20?%”

“You just call me “Bro” for the res of them.” You squeezed his cheek and planted a kiss there.

“I like it though, not too cheesy.”

He grew red. “Gosh I am having the Jaehyun syndrome. Why are my ears burning?!”

He was not 100% wrong, his parents were nice they grew fond of you especially when you helped his mother prepared lunch. Well you both arrived earlier and you decided to give a hand for the busy mom.

Mark sat next to you on dinner and when you were diving into a yummy Christmas pudding, his parents began asking you the “platonic questions asked to your partner”.

You almost chocked on your pudding when they asked “Are you seeing a future with Mark? Can you make our son happy and us too?”

You were not ready, you expected questions like where you work or where you live. They said “We can find all that answers in the internet, but not the answer to our question.”

Mark’s gentle kick from under the table by your side made you looked at him and he gave you that sincere smile only you have the privilege to see. He nodded slightly and shot his eyebrow to his parents side “Answer them… I am also curious of the answer.”

You grew red, it wasn’t the drink or anything, but his parent’s happy and relieved face when you nod your head and said “I am seeing a future with him, if I get both of your blessing.”

They love you and Mark was right. That night, you invited his family to join your dinner instead. The same question was asked from your parents to Mark and Mark was more than ready to marry you.

But your wedding bells did not chime that fast. He has his career and so do you, both of you just keep the stable relationship going on. Together facing the problems and obstacles in your relationship. Fights occur, bickering occur, threads of breaking up also happened once or twice… but both of you used that to build a stronger bond.

You always melt when Mark came home from a long day. After he showered and savored his dinner, he always ended up leaning on your shoulder in the big snuggle sofa both of you never regret buying. His head on your shoulder, his hand scribbling words to a paper and you whispering ideas to him which brought a big smile to his face.

Writing lyrics has been even easier for Mark, he blended your frustration with his, splattered some love words, and voila a masterpiece! People said his lyrics were relatable and both of you always keep it to yourself that “those happened in our life, no wonder it looked real.”

He always kissed you gently on your lips, tasting the faint cherry flavour of your lip balm. Mark’s lips tasted of medical lip balm, but you love it nonetheless.

You blinked and realized the flashing cameras in front of you. Oh right, someone from the hot magazine company is asking you a question.

‘Can you please repeat your question?” you asked politely to the lady holding out a mic.

She quickly nodded, “A lot of fans are wondering If you are still in a relationship with Mark. Mark was busy for the last months with projects and comebacks. And the interaction update from both of you are little to none. Fans suspected you were over with him, considering that Mark looked like he is the “plain” type in a relationship.”

You pressed a smile, hiding your urge to laugh out loud. Weren’t the fans always picturing Mark as their dream boyfriend? Why did they judge him as the plain boring type then?

You clear your throat and while looking through the crowds, you spot Mark Lee seated in the crowd with a mask and a hat, giving you a nod, and you turned your mic on.

“We’re still going strong; well I think love is not the type of grand gestures or explosive displays.” You started off and caught everyone’s attention.

“It’s made up of little things,” you felt your heart clench upon remembering all the small affections Mark always did to you. “It’s the little things Mark Lee did that say he is here, and he cared for me and that my life has intertwined so deeply into his that there was no need to think.” You take a pause to look at the audience.

Everyone looked impressed, but amongst them you catch one pair of gleaming proud eyes, the pair of eyes you’ve been waking up to for the last years, and the one you want to wake up to in the future years.

“It’s Mark’s casual intimacy that made us both stay strong and stronger.”

Applaud was heard through the room, you were holding your press conference because you were retreating from all the cooking shows and rumor has it you are going to marry Mark.

“Please pray for both of us, as we will be tying our bonds soon.” You leave the room after a bow and the man with mask and hat is already waiting for you outside the big crowded function hall.

His hand naturally makes its way to your waist and you never felt more sure to step into life with this man you love, Mark Lee.

“That was wonderful (y/n)~”

You smile, he did not dude you nor bro you nor baby you. “I love you Mark Lee,”

He leaned in for a peck behind the tinted black van window, “I love you most (y/n) Lee,” he winked and you rubbed your cheeks “Guess I have the Jaehyun syndrome now! Also I like it when you call me with that name.”

He quirked his eyebrow and smirked, “Don’t worry, you’ll be hearing that soon for the rest of your life.” He reached for your hand and kissed the knuckles.

“I met you thanks to your amazing handy work in cooking unforgettable dish.”

You rolled your eyes, “You were so amazed on my egg benedict Mark! How is that an unforgettable dish?”

He shrugged his shoulder, “I don’t know, something about you, cooking, and love made me this love struck and awfully amazed by simple things you did.”

the end

thanks for reading, put in comments for I’d love to interact with you on the story plot .. rant to me what you hate or like idc :D i want to talk with my readers! to thank you all for reading and spending some time here

omg i didn’t know if I made the right choice of making Mark Lee as this character, but I want it to be him.. I’ve been writing a lot of Jaehyun and Yuta fic and I guess Mark can be a refresher. Please let me know if someone else suits this better!

#mark lee x you #mark lee x y/n #mark lee x reader #mark x y/n #mark x you #mark x reader #mark lee #mark lee imagines #mark lee scenarios #mark lee oneshot #mark scenarios #mark lee fanfic #mark lee fluff #mark imagines #nct 127 imagines #nct 127 soft hours #nct fluff #mark fluff

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hoodedguitarist · 3 years

Text

Luminescence

Gif not miiinee Pairing: Qui-Gon Jinn x Jedi!Reader

Summary: You and Qui-Gon find yourselves on one of the lesser known, lesser visited planets. Having narrowly escaped a sudden attack from some raiders, you and your crew have landed on this serene and beautiful planet to make a few repairs and take a break before returning to Coruscant.

Warnings: Fluff, Mush, Kisses, Confessions, not held responsible for any cavities you may develop whilst/after reading this. :D

Notes: Apparently there’s a serious shortage of Qui-Gon x Reader fics?? This is what I heard. I’m doing my part, saving the fangirls and all. Qui-Gon is one of my absolute favorite characters but I can’t bring myself to write a smut thing for him. @chadillacboseman this is the best I can do. This is for you my dear <3 I hope you like it. Also, I just made this planet up on the fly. ALSO also, loosely based off of this beautiful poem. Can you tell I want to go to a bioluminescent bay? Cause I do. Ok I’ll shut up now.

The ship had been in a good enough condition to land properly. Luckily, none of the raiders had followed, but repairs were needed before you could continue.

“This planet is peaceful,” Qui-Gon assured you and the other two who were with you. “And I’m sure they will have the part that we need. It’s a simple enough task. Jado, Tyla?”

“We know what to look for and we know what we need,” Jado, the mechanic, answered. He gave a reassuring smile and a nod.

“Good. In that case, we will stay here with the ship,” Qui-Gon motioned to himself and you.

“Are you sure it’s safe enough to send them out on their own?” You asked gently. “Shouldn’t one of us go?”

“We can take care of it,” Tyla, the pilot, promised. “We don’t need the Jedi constantly watching over us, we’ve got our blasters and know how to use them,” she smirked.

“Clumsy and random,” you quipped back with a smile.

“Not in our hands,” Jado chuckled. He nudged Tyla. “Come on, let’s head out. We’ll try to be back before dark.”

The pilot and the mechanic made their way off the ship, and you and Qui-Gon were alone. You couldn’t help but be a little worried. You weren’t very familiar with this planet and had certainly never visited. He sensed your unease and stepped over to you, looking down into your eyes.

“It’s alright, my dear,” he assured, sliding a hand onto your shoulder. His touch comforted you and made a warmth spread through your chest. He gave you a knowing smile. “I told you, this planet is peaceful. My instincts tell me we won’t have any trouble.”

You raised a brow, amusement written on your face. “Qui, when are we not in trouble? This whole situation was caused because trouble found us. And don’t try to quell me with your sweet talk, it won’t work.”

You and Qui-Gon weren’t really together… You went on an awful lot of missions together, though, and you flirted a lot. It was mild when people were around but when you were alone, it always seemed a bit more serious. He always made your heart beat a touch faster and gave your stomach butterflies.

You were also at least half sure that his Padawan, Obi-Wan Kenobi, could sense something between the two of you, but he never said anything. Obi wasn’t there, though… And the realization that you and Qui-Gon were alone together suddenly hung heavy in the air.

“I am not trying to quell you,” he had a soft laugh in his voice. “I would never try to do such a thing to you, I only mean to reassure you.”

“Well, perhaps I would feel better if I explored a little outside. I’ve always heard this place is beautiful at night but this is my first time being here.”

“Ynirro is known for its magical oceans and white beaches. If you want to explore, I will stay with the ship.”

“What’s so magical about the oceans?” You asked, genuinely curious.

“When night falls, I will show you,” He had that look about him, that look that clearly said he knew something that you didn’t. It was mischievous, but endearing. “For now, stay in sight of the ship. I know the beach is close by, but wait for me. I wish to see it with you.”

“That’s very romantic of you, Master Qui-Gon,” you teased softly, placing your hand over his that still lay on your shoulder. His smile faded and was replaced with a more thoughtful look. Your chest tightened in slight panic. Did you say something wrong? Was that too much?

His features soon softened, though, and a gentle smile tugged at the corner of his lips. He lifted his thumb and ran it along your fingers, even going so far as to clasp your hand in his. His blue eyes locked earnestly with yours.

“Only for you,” his sincerity startled you a bit. Your heart began to race. He took your hand and brought it to his lips, kissing the back of it. “Go on, go do your exploring. I’ll be right here.”

“Alright…” You barely managed the word. It came out as more of a soft breath than an actual word. He had enraptured you and your skin now tingled pleasantly where his lips had touched. You took a step back but squeezed his hand gently one last time. He returned it before you both reluctantly let go.

When you finally made it outside you had a chance to take a breath and calm yourself down. Of course, the first thing that popped into your mind was the Jedi Council. They hung like a little grey cloud over your head, always watching, always wary. You and Qui-Gon were not like the other Jedi. The both of you followed the will of the Force more than the code, often going against the Council’s wishes at times. If they found out about this, they would not be pleased and you ran the risk of being kicked out.

You blinked and had found that your feet had already started walking while your brain went in another direction. Your eyes took in your surroundings, noticing the lush greenery of the forest and taking in the sweet scents of tropical flowers that bloomed around you. It was a paradise, that much was certain. You made a note to come back to Ynirro when you had free time, if only for a slight vacation… And maybe you wouldn’t be alone.

“What am I thinking?” You said softly to yourself. “Kai Adi-Mundi has four wives!” You shook your head. There was no way that you were going to let the council control that part of your life. You and Qui-Gon seemed to share a bond, even from the moment you first met. The both of you always knew what the other was thinking or feeling… Dare you even think that you shared a bond within the Force? That it led you both to each other?

Your heart leapt at the idea and you glanced back in the direction of the ship. You would try not to get your hopes up, however. You didn’t want to jump the gun, or blaster as it were. You were sure he was thinking through a few things as well with the time that he had. Instead, you turned and walked into another direction, letting your fingers ghost over the soft petals of a blue flower. The sun would be gone soon but it would give you both enough time to think before nightfall.

~*~

Twilight was fading and it had grown darker as you made your way back to the ship. A few lights were on and the platform was extended still. You smiled and adjusted your robes before heading up into the ship.

“Qui-Gon?”

“There you are,” he turned, smiling at you. “Well, do you feel better now? More at peace?”

“I do. Not just with Ynirro but with a few other things that were on my mind as well.”

“I did the same while you were gone. Night has fallen but I would like to wait for Tyla and Jado to return-” A noise cut his sentence off and the both of you looked back to see the two in question come in.

“We got the part!” Jado said excitedly. “Tyla and I will get to work on it right away.”

“Take your time, don’t rush,” you said gently. “The ship must be fixed properly and if we have to stay here overnight, so be it.”

“I agree. A rushed job is often a poor one,” Qui-Gon said wisely.

“We’ll take our time,” Tyla promised. “We’ll get it done right and be back in Coruscant before you know it.”

“Well, we’re going to observe the beach. I hear the ocean is quite a sight to behold. When you two finish, come and join us. I promise you won’t be disappointed,” Qui-Gon put a gentle hand on the small of your back and you stood up a little straighter, your smile widening.

“We will! Have fun!” Tyla chirped before she began to rummage around in a box of tools.

You and Qui-Gon both headed out and into the warm night air. You couldn’t hide the excitement now that the two of you were alone. “I can’t wait!” You walked close to him, looking up at him. “What is it? Can you give me a hint? Is it creatures of some kind that live in the ocean?”

Qui-Gon tilted his head a little and smirked. “To a degree, yes,” he gave you a sideways glance. “But that is all I will tell you. Come, take my hand,” he stopped and held his hand out. Your eyes met and you smiled, sliding your hand into his. He laced your fingers together and led you through the bushes. You noticed that there was a faint blue glow coming from up ahead. You stayed close to him, your hand tightening in his with anticipation. The glow was calm, soft, and became brighter the closer you got to it.

Suddenly, the terrain changed beneath your feet and you noticed the white sands. You were at the shore line.

“Close your eyes,” Qui-Gon’s voice was right at your ear. You could feel his breath brush down your neck and it made your lips part. A soft breath left you and you turned to look up at him. The both of you were a mere inch away from each other. He smiled at you and let his eyes run over your face for a moment before his free hand came up. He pushed a stray strand back from your face and curled it behind your ear. His fingertips ghosted down the shell of your ear and down along your neck. “Close your eyes, love,” he whispered.

You nodded, licking your lips and taking a deep breath. Your eyes fluttered shut and you tightened your grip on his hand just a little. Your other hand came up and you placed it on his arm. There was the sound of leaves being pushed apart and Qui-Gon tugged you gently in his direction. You stepped forward, being careful of the sudden thickness of the sand. You could feel that you were actually on the beach now, having cleared the tree-line.

Qui-Gon carefully lead you further and further until he stopped and you stopped with him.

“Alright, open your eyes,” he whispered. You did as you were told and what you saw made your jaw drop and your eyes widen.

The ocean waters of Ynirro were shimmering with beautiful blue lights. It was as if the stars had fallen and landed in the waters, making the oceans their new home. As the waves rolled up onto the white sandy shores, the lights brightened when the water stirred them, and then they calmed again when they floated back into the sea.

“Qui-Gon…” Your voice was breathless with awe, your eyes transfixed on the enchanting sight before you. In all your years of being a Jedi, all the places it had taken you, you had never seen something so beautiful.

“Microscopic bioluminescent creatures. They live in the oceans and soak up the sun's rays during the day, then put the stars to shame at night,” he explained.

You were enraptured by the sight before you…

And Qui-Gon was enraptured by you.

The way the lights bathed you in a soft blue glow. It shined in your hair, on your face, in your eyes. He was taken with the sight of you and loved to see you in such pure wonder.

Your senses pricked at you lightly and you blinked, turning your gaze away from the sight, only to see Qui-Gon already looking at you. You felt a blush try to crawl up your neck, but you smiled and laughed softly. “Qui, this is the most… Amazing thing I’ve ever seen. It’s so beautiful.”

“It is… Beautiful…” His voice was soft and his eyes never left yours. Your hands were still clasped. You stood side by side, both bathed in the glow. He turned to face you and his hand came up again, cupping your cheek. His calloused thumb ran across your cheek bone and you gave a soft in-take of breath.

“Qui-Gon...” His name was a plea on your lips, a soft begging lilt as you leaned into his touch. You placed your hand over his and your eyes darted to his lips. That was all the indication he needed. The Jedi Master leaned down and captured your lips in a slow, loving kiss.

Your eyes shut and you leaned into the kiss, a peace settling over you. It was as if this kiss was the last missing peace, the last thing that was needed to solidify the bond growing between you. You wrapped your hand gently around his wrist, rubbing your thumb along the back of his hand that still cupped your cheek. He let go of your hand in favor of sliding it around the curve of your waist and pulling you closer.

It felt like your heart had grown wings, like it wanted to flutter out of your chest. Your free hand slid along the back of his neck and into his long hair. There was no space left between the two of you. Qui-Gon had pulled you flush against him and he had deepened the kiss. Your lips moved slowly against each other, savoring the moment and every feeling. You were sure you’d never been kissed so passionately and so lovingly in your life.

He pulled back, only barely, and your eyes opened and met again.

“I love you,” he admitted. “I cannot hide it any longer and I don’t care what the Council thinks.”

“The Council doesn't need to know,” you answered without missing a beat. “They are already in our lives too much. They already root around in matters that should not concern them.”

Qui-Gon smiled at this and rubbed his nose against yours. “Then this will be ours. This moment, this love, this bond we share, it is ours and is of no concern to anyone else.”

“Except perhaps Obi-Wan,” you teased softly. Qui-Gon chuckled, low and warm.

“He is clever, but I trust him. If he does know or if he figures out, I know he will keep our secret safe.”

“Good…” You rested your forehead against his, running your fingers gently through the loose part of his hair. “I love you Qui-Gon…” You whispered.

He ran his fingers through your hair and pulled you close again, kissing you deeply while you bathed in the celestial glow of the luminescent waves.

Yeah, I’m soft and cryin a little, not gonna lie. We’re all just gonna pretend Qui-Gon lives and yall live happily ever after, training Anakin and Obi-Wan and Anakin grows up with a stable father figure in his life and doesn’t turn to the dark side. Palps gets OUTED like the trash he is and Anakin and Padme have lil Luke and Leia and You and Qui-Gon become like the most awesome grandparents in the galaxy. THE END

*takes a deep breath*

Thanks for reading everyone! I headcanon that Qui-Gon is on some serious romantic level shit. Like that man will make you feel loved, give you all the passion, and make sure you feel it deep down in your soul.

As always, if you wanna be added to the tags list just shoot me a message! Inbox/asks is always open. If I hit 200 followers I’ll do some drabble requests. Never done that before, sounds fun and chaotic. I’m here for it!

Tagslist: @the-grey-jedi @hayley-the-comet @pinkiemme @swordandstar @chadillacboseman

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juniorgman187 · 4 years

Text

Never Enough (Spencer Reid Drabble)

Summary: Ever wondered what Garcia wrote on that sticky note in the series finale? Read here to find out. When Reader, the new technical analyst, feels out of place at a party, Penelope’s sticky note and Reid’s kind words do just the trick.

A/N: This is a comfort piece for me, someone very introverted who never seems to do well in social gatherings. So this is dedicated to anyone who’s ever felt like they didn’t belong. You are loved. Couple: Fem!Reader x Spencer Reid Category: Fluff, Drabble Content Warning: Fear of exclusion, loneliness Word Count: 2.4k

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

All my life, all I’d ever wanted was to be a social butterfly. Their lives seemed so easy. People would naturally flock to them, what with their charisma, their confidence, their natural gift of being conversational.

I envied them for the sole reason that I was nothing like them, not in the slightest.

It wasn’t easy for me to keep a conversation going, even if I was trying my very hardest, which was often the case. I could never seem to commandeer the room in the way that someone extroverted could, and it was especially hard sometimes to feel a part of everyone.

It would be too easy to say I was invisible. Instead, I felt painfully visible, and entirely ignored.

Everyone could see my shyness peeking through, everyone could see how alienated I’d become, everyone could see my despondence, and yet no one bothered to change it.

No one cared.

My excruciating awkwardness had reached an all-time high at Krystall’s birthday party.

Agent Rossi was so keen on inviting me, and I was honored to go since it’d be my first bonding experience with the team outside of work. I couldn’t turn down the opportunity to grow closer to them, otherwise, I’d run the risk of isolating myself even more. As if being brought in as the BAU’s new technical analyst to replace Penelope Garcia wasn’t enough of a reason for them to doubt, despise, and disrespect me, I was the introvert who had a hard time making friends - unlike my predecessor, who’ve I heard could make friends like nobody’s business. I knew I could never fill her shoes, much less fill the glaring void she created when she left, but still, I maintained my bright-eyes in hopes that I’d be enough for them, anyway. I was all too eager to get to know everyone as more than just my coworkers, with one exception.

Dr. Reid maintained an arm’s length distance from me at all times, and at first, I understood. I even empathized with him.

Besides SSA Morgan and SSA Hotchner, the only other person that he’d work the longest with was Penelope, and now she was gone, too, but the longer his rejection of me lasted, the more I was curious what he truly had against me, and the more I was less interested in changing that. Why would I work tirelessly at mending this broken friendship, if he wasn’t willing to meet me halfway?

I was more shocked that he, of all people, would be the most displeased with my arrival. When Agent Rossi replaced Agent Gideon, from what I heard, the transition wasn’t as rocky as mine. Dr. Reid was overjoyed to be working with him and to discuss all his books. When Jordan Todd, and eventually Ashley Seaver, took Agent Jareau’s place momentarily, he was happy to be working with them. When Alex Blake and Kate Callahan came in after Emily Prentiss, he welcomed them with open arms. So what was it about me that was so abhorrent to him?

I never outright asked, mainly because I feared confrontation and I also had no way of knowing if my curiosity would make the situation worse or better. But I should’ve. I should’ve marched right up to him and asked, “What’s your problem?”

Somehow, though, I finally got up the courage to do so tonight.

I watched as the team laughed at one of Rossi’s anecdotes, meanwhile, the inside jokes flew over my head, hindering that bonding experience I was so sure I’d get by coming here. So I stepped inside the house, wandering into a spare room, knowing I wouldn’t be missed.

I thought I’d only be there for a moment to get some “fresh air” even though I’d actually migrated from the outside to the inside, where there’d arguably be less fresh air, but that’d be my excuse if anyone came in. But I was forced to stay longer in the office when it finally happened.

I finally reached my breaking point.

It was building up all night. It started when I first stepped into the house. My confidence faltered almost immediately when I accidentally stepped on Rossi’s Italian leather dress shoe as I went to greet him. He told me not to worry, but of course, I did just the opposite. It was a minor bump in the road, something so minute, but still, it weighed on me thinking about how embarrassing it was that I dirtied something of his that everyone recognized as valuable.

My shame didn’t stop there. As I was talking with Krystall, there were many periods of awkward silence that I couldn’t manage to fill with words, so we each sipped at our wine until one of us would try to pick up the conversation. What’s worse was that we each knew the silence was suffocating, and I could tell we were both thinking of things to say to keep the conversation going, and yet, nothing worth saying came to mind.

And worst of all was when Penelope Garcia finally arrived at the party. Don’t misunderstand me - it wasn’t the worst part of all because she was bad - no, she was lovely. She gave me a welcome present - a Beanie Baby to put on my desk, evocative of her own style of decor, and I loved her for it, which made me hate her all the more.

Rossi’s house livened up when she came. Everyone flocked to greet her, laughter erupted and ricocheted off Rossi’s high ceilings. They were positively elated by her presence, truly happy. Which was the first time I’d ever seen them that way because frankly, they were never that happy with me.

It was a painful reminder that I could never bring what she brought to the team, and I could never be as good as her. And the general consensus I reached, sitting in Rossi’s office all alone with my glass of wine, was the same one I’d known for years now - I’m not enough.

And I will never be enough.

I hadn’t realized I was crying until a tear cascaded down my cheek, dripping right under my nose, forcing me to audibly sniffle it away. Using the sleeve of my cardigan, I desperately tried to wipe away the tears faster than they were spilling out, but it just wasn’t possible. In fact, the coarse fabric of my cardigan rubbing against my cheeks only made them redder, making the fact that I was unwell that much more obvious.

The sound of the doorknob turning sent me into overdrive, automatically engaging me into turning around and facing the wall so that whoever was coming in wouldn’t find me in the state that I was in. I sniffled a great big sniffle and fanned my face to dry it of any moisture that my silent sobs could’ve left.

“Sorry, Rossi, I was just getting some fresh air and I thought I’d check out your book collectio-”

When I turned around, Rossi wasn’t standing there as I’d assumed.

In fact, the person standing there was the last person I thought it’d be.

“Dr. Reid?”

He was lingering in the doorway, studying my face, to which I instantly preventing from continuing on any further by cowering my head and looking away.

“What are you doing here?” My voice had taken a tone of anger that I didn’t anticipate to be there originally.

“Are you okay?”

To my surprise, his question seemed sincere, but I couldn’t truly believe it was.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just allergies from being outside for so long. The pollen and stuff, you know?” I rambled nervously.

“Oh, really? Are you allergic to the grass?” He asked in a joking manner, knowing I was lying but still asking so that he’d have the satisfaction of getting to see me try and work my way out of the situation.

“Yes, I am actually. The most common outdoor allergy triggers are trees, grass, weed pollen, mold spores, dust mites, cockroaches, and cat, dog, and rodent dander. Don’t you know this? After all, you’re the one with the IQ of 187 here, not me.” I tried to joke to lighten up the room’s heaviness, but clearly, it didn’t work.

By this time, I’d already turned back to face the wall, so Reid surely couldn’t see me, but I heard the door click shut behind me, and a wave of anxiety permeated my soul.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?”

I scoffed at his question, almost hitting him back with an “As if you care.” But I decided against it in an effort to preserve what little repose we had left between us.

“Will you please tell me what’s wrong?” He sounded like he was begging - like he was practically willing to go on his hands and knees to get me to answer, but all I could focus on was the feeling of his hot breath ghosting over my neck.

Goosebumps rose on my skins once he put his warm hand on my cold shoulder, which was bare from the absence of my cardigan and where it had slipped down to my elbow.

I flinched at the sensation, causing him to recoil.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.” He quickly apologized, regret filling his eyes. “Um, you look nice by the way. I like the way you did your hair. A-and your dress. It looks nice.”

Not even giving a chance to respond to his compliment, I asked again, “Why are you here?” Pressing him to get the point faster before I had a chance to react at another one of his physical advances.

“I saw you leave the backyard and I thought I should check on you.”

“Well, you’ve checked on me, so you can go back now.” I didn’t miss a beat when responding, fooling him into thinking that I didn’t catch his words and their intentions.

“I just want to talk.” He replied, finally answering my question from before.

“Okay. Let’s talk.”

He took a seat on a chaise lounge sofa while I stayed standing by the bookcase in preparation for a quick escape if need be.

“I’m sorry I’ve been pushing you away. That wasn’t fair of me.”

Although I hadn’t expected him to apologize, I wasn’t going to be misled and naively accept his apology with no reservations.

“Why did you do it? And for so long?”

“I was angry. I didn’t want another person in my life that I cared about to walk away, so I thought maybe if I made you feel unwelcome, you wouldn’t want to stay. And she’d come back.”

It hurt to say, but at least I knew he was being honest.

“I accept your apology, but it’s not okay.”

“I know that.”

“Okay, are we good now? We’ve talked, so,” My hand gestured toward the door, suggesting he should leave, but he didn’t comply.

“I’m not leaving.”

“And why not?” The wine glass in my hand nearly shattered at the way my hand wrapped around it since its presence hindered me from being able to actually clench my fists.

“I didn’t come here to apologize, even though I should’ve sooner. But I came here because I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“Like you care.” I chuckled mirthlessly.

“I do care.”

I gave in, not wanting to fight him any longer, otherwise, I might cry some more from the altercation.

“I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not,” He shook his head. “I know you’re not fine. What’s really wrong, Y/N?”

I looked away immediately from his gaze, trying to hide the sheen that was inevitably coating my eyes from the presence of tears, but he would’ve known I was crying the minute I used the cuff of my cardigan to wipe under my nose again.

“I just . . . I feel so unconnected,” I whispered, the pain of my words stealing my volume. “I don’t fit in. And I’ve never fit in before, but I actually thought this might be my chance.”

“It still is. Just come back outside.”

“You don’t get it!”

“What don’t I get?”

“I just needed to take a moment to compose myself so I wouldn’t ruin the energy of the room. And I’d really like to do that alone, okay?”

“I know you don’t want me to go.”

“What?”

“You’re testing me to see if I’ll stay.”

“No, I’m not.”

“So you’re saying that if I left right now, you wouldn’t regret letting me walk away?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

“I know you’re lying to me.”

“I’m not lying.”

“Yes, you are. I know what it looks like when you lie. Wanna know how I know?”

I entertained his question out of pure frustration “How?”

“Because I pay attention to you. I see your mannerisms. I notice everything. Do you think I haven’t picked up on how you crack your knuckles when you’re nervous? Or how your stutter goes away when you talk about technology? Or how your fists clench, like how you’re doing right now?”

My eyes flickered to my fist that was wrapped so tightly around the glass, my knuckles were white. Out of shame, I loosened my grip.

“I pay attention because I care. And I’m sorry that I made you ever believe that I didn’t. What you do, and say, and think - it’s important. So no, I’m not leaving. I’m staying right here to give you the attention you deserve.” He sighed with a breath of relief. “I care more about you than whatever’s happening out there.”

And slowly, then all at once, that barrier between us broke down.

“I care about you. We all do. And when you’re ready, we can walk back out there together so that you can see for yourself just how much we care.”

. . . That night, I made nine more friends.

And the day we came back to work, with my Beanie Baby in hand, I rearranged my desk.

A folded up sticky note fell out from between two tables. I picked it up, recognizing the handwriting instantly.

Penelope Garcia.

Even when the laughter always seems to come from the other room and the world seems busy as it carries on without you, may you know this to be true. No matter who or what made you feel invisible, unworthy, unloved, or unseen, in this ever-moving world, there is still a place for you. And you are exactly in the place where you are meant to be.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

quote by morgan harper nichols

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paralleledmediaexperience · 3 years

Text

a part 2 to this ficlet as requested by @xanthomonus in the notes! I’ve got at least one more part conceptualized (no way you can guess what’ll happen there) though i may extend it or add more, so if anyone would like to be tagged let me know!!

Sam is insistent that they try to research ways to get Cas back. Jack has explained that Amara won’t fail- it is simply the process of extracting an Angel from the Empty that takes time, since she didn’t want to wake or anger it like… well, like what Jack had done. He could feel Amara’s sincerity in a way that he was certain Sam and Dean wouldn’t understand, let alone be comforted by. She’d been in his head, crossed with his soul in the transfer of power. He’s kind of sure that if he hadn’t missed Cas so much too, she probably would have ignored Dean’s request altogether.

But it makes Sam look less frazzled when he’s able to lose himself in the research for something, and Jack doesn’t mind sitting with him and pretending he’s not hiding chapter books behind the large tomes. He’s been working his way steadily through some books Sam had collected for him last time they had been out shopping, and while he had enjoyed the first one (a mystery about siblings called the Boxcar children even though they no longer lived in a boxcar) he’d chosen Matilda next, because she sounded nice. And he was right! Matilda was his new favorite, even more than his last favorite, which had been Where the Wild Things Are.

He doesn’t even notice when Dean walks in, because Matilda had just glued a hat to her father’s head, but he does when Sam says, “What, none for me?”

“You’re a grown man, Sammy, you can make your own food. He’s four years old with a foot injury.” Dean says, scowling at Sam. The effect is rather ruined by both Dean’s flour dusted apron and the plate in his hands, and Jack smiles when he turns back to him instead. “You both missed lunch.”

Sam grumbles, but gets up anyway, stretching. “If you didn’t make me food how could I have missed it?”

“Shut up,” Dean shoots back half-heartedly. “Here, Jack, and don’t let him steal off your plate just because he got distracted reading.”

“Thanks, Dean!” Jack says brightly, moving his secret reading setup to the table instead of his lap and pushing it away, ignoring the way Sam’s eyebrows raise when he notices his no longer hidden book. Dean sets the plate down and ignores that Sam sends him one last annoyed face before heading off to the kitchen, where Jack knows there is going to be a plate ready for Sam, or at least a serving of the macaroni and cheese sprinkled with bacon bits and breadcrumbs that Dean’s brought him. “Are you making something else?”

“Just some bread,” Dean grimaces down at the mess of flour across his front, and Jack has to contain his giggles when the movement reveals a streak of flour in Dean’s hair.

“Just some bread,” Sam echoes, swinging back through the door with his own plate of macaroni. “Dean. Do I need to remind you that we need vegetables and can’t live off of carbs and meat alone?”

“It’s macaroni, Sam, quit whining and just enjoy it,” Dean rolls his eyes. “I swear, you’re the pickiest-”

“It’s not being picky, it’s eating healthy-”

“Same difference!” Dean insists, his twitching lips betraying the irritation in his voice.

“Just one meal with something green a day, Dean, I’m begging you.”

Eyes flicking back and forth as they snipe at each other, Jack takes an appreciative bite of the macaroni. Expectedly delicious, because Dean made it and Dean didn't make bad food the way Sam sometimes did. Mostly.

“Then beg,” Dean proclaims stubbornly, eyes narrowed. Sam doesn’t respond, his own expression pinching up into very familiar exasperation.

“Actually, I’ve never had brussel sprouts before, and Claire said I should try them!” Jack interjects. He isn’t sure what a brussel sprout is beyond a vegetable, but Claire had said he’d like them and that he should bother Dean into making them.

Dean looks unimpressed though, gaze switching from Sam back to meet Jack’s eyes. “You want me to make you brussel sprouts?”

“Please?” Jack tries, unsure if Dean thinks there is something wrong with brussel sprouts or if he is still simply offended by the concept of vegetables.

The please works, Dean’s capitulation coming in the form of a displeased huff and an, “Alright, fine.” He swings back around to point at Sam accusingly. “I’m blaming you for this.”

“As long as we get something from each of the five food groups, sure,” Sam says, taking his seat again. “And no, you don’t get to use tomatoes as the catch all.”

“Fine,” Dean bites out again, clapping Jack on the shoulder as he starts to turn away.

“Thank you Dean! Love you!” Jack says, and he hears Sam’s quick inhale just as he sees Dean almost stumble and he smiles to himself.

“Love you too, kid,” Dean manages to get out, hand squeezing just a bit tighter on his shoulder. “Alright, go back to your books, I have to go to the store for brussel sprouts apparently.”

The speed at which Dean walks away couldn’t be called running away but Jack definitely thinks it qualifies as retreating, and he straightens up a bit, very proud of himself for receiving his second ‘love you’ from Dean in twice as many days. He watches Dean get out the door before turning back around in his seat.

Sam is staring at him with a blinking mixture of incredulity and open affection, the smile on his face wide, if confused. “That’s… new?”

“Yep,” Jack confirms, pulling Matilda back towards himself and abandoning the pretense of reading the book Sam had suggested he search through. Sam had already searched it himself twice. He doesn’t manage to open it, because Sam continues.

“And I don’t need to check that it’s actually Dean?” Sam teases, bewilderment clear and pride clearer. “Saying yes to vegetables AND and I love you?”

“It turns out,” A voice whipcracks out, startling them both, “That Dean Winchester is actually a big old softie at heart. Who knew?”

“Balthazar?” Sam says, and Jack almost gets bowled over by the wave of shock. Balthazar? He knew that name. He stares openly, unheeded as Balthazar talks to Sam.

“Well, except Castiel, of course, but that Profound Bond of theirs hardly makes it fair,” The angel says, stepping forward. “Yes, Sam, I’ve been hand delivered back from the dead, at the temporary cost of my Grace. Don’t look at me like that.”

“Your grace?” Jack asks, curious about how Sam had been looking at him, but unwilling to turn around and take his eyes off of the angel Cas had once killed. “What do you mean?”

“Ah,” Balthazar strides over, and before Jack can say anything he’s got him clasped by both shoulders, staring into his eyes with a curiosity so intense Jack almost steps back towards the table. “And you’re Jack, I assume? I was warned that there would be no murdering of nephilim if I returned.”

“So Amara freed you?” Sam cuts in, and Jack huffs out a small breath as Balthazar lets him go to spin back around and face him. “Did she have a reason?”

Jack doesn’t voice his own question, which feels far more important. He wants to know when Cas will be back.

“Uh, yes?” Balthazar sneers. “Most of the angels are dead, Sam, no thanks to you and your brother and my brother. I’ll admit some of us deserved it- were rather asking for it, if you ask me- but it did leave dear aunty with rather less personnel than she wants to run heaven with.”

“She’s not grabbing all the angels, is she?” Jack breathes, terrified suddenly, despite Balthazar’s assurance that Amara had apparently set him off limits.

“Not a chance. Seemed to have a list in mind, and I think I was simply the first she found. I thought perhaps…” He trails off, just for a split second before he grins again, bright and covering up anything he might have been about to show. “Well, I didn’t, actually. Rather hard to do when you’re sleeping in eternal torment.”

Jack catches Sam’s flinch, and frowns at the other man. “Are you sure you were the first?”

Balthazar ticks his head to one side, considering. “Well, I’m the first to show up here, I’ll assume by your reactions, and given that she’s bringing us back graceless, I imagine any others will also be sent here.”

Jack scowls. If so, then Cas may be further off than he hoped. But this was- conclusive proof. Amara could do it, and now they would just have to deal with powerless angels until she came back and dealt with them herself. And Cas would be home.

Sam sighs, deep and weary and cheerless. “Yeah. That would make sense. Well, we can put this away, then.” He closes the book on the table with a hefty thump and then stacks Jack’s abandoned tome on top of it. “And I suppose we should try to make sure we have rooms ready. Jack, would you-”

“I’ll call Dean and let him know,” Jack says, suddenly tired and wanting to get away from Balthazar, still staring at him hawkishly, wanting to be away from the library, where more angels could show up without warning. He wants to hide in his room or possibly Cas’ until Amara brings him back and takes all the others back to heaven or whatever she planned to do. He wishes viciously in his head that he hadn’t opened his mouth about brussel sprouts and that Dean was still here in the kitchen where Jack could escape to without feeling alone. As it is, he grabs Matilda and his plate, still half full of macaroni, ready to walk away, but he catches Balthazar’s face again.

“You’re hungry,” Jack realizes as he says it. Balthazar has a facial journey of his own to deal with that fact before he grimaces.

“Human,” he says, displeasure and embarrassment warring on his features, even as his stomach growls.

Jack doesn’t want Balthazar here, he doesn’t want Amara to try to find anyone but Cas, or at least to find Cas first, and he most definitely doesn’t want to share his food that Dean made him, or Dean and Sam’s attention in general, and he swallows all of this down and he says, “Here. If you’ve never been human before, you’ve never really tasted food, right? Dean’s always makes the best food.”

He holds out the plate and drops it into Balthazar’s hands and tries his best not to stomp out like a real child, or run out like he’s scared, but he makes it around the corner and leans against the wall, out of sight.

Except that Sam immediately pokes his head around, following him. “Jack?”

“I don’t like this,” Jack says plainly, staring up at Sam like maybe he could explain why all of the good feelings he’d been having had shriveled up in his stomach and refused to leave, even though Sam clearly didn’t think Balthazar was an actual threat to them.

“I could tell,” Sam says, almost teasing again, but he drops it immediately. “Is it okay, Jack? Because we can absolutely just send him and any others that show up to the nearest motel instead.”

“No,” He says immediately, but he pauses after, thinking. He takes a deep breath in, trying to ease the odd tightness inside his chest. “No. They can stay here until Amara gets back. I just…”

“Don’t like it,” Sam nods, as if that explains it, and Jack guesses it does. “Well, Dean won’t like it either, so you can let him know that the two of you are free to hole up wherever you’d like to get away from them, and I’ll try to deal with them myself as much as I can.”

The tightness in his chest does soften, another breath rushing out like he’d been holding it. “Thanks, Sam.”

“You know I love you too, Jack,” Sam says, earnest and open and Jack barely makes the decision to hug him but he ends up wrapped up in Sam’s arms anyhow.

“I do. I know. Love you, Sam,” Jack says, fixing his grip on Matilda as he pulls away. “Okay, I need to go call Dean, because if he leaves the store before-”

“He won’t want to turn around, yeah,” Sam laughs.

Jack can’t help the smile that bursts across his face. “Well, I can’t use it too often, or it might not work anymore, but maybe if I say please.”

#Jack Kline #Sam Winchester #Dean Winchester #Balthazar #supernatural #my fic #creativecaviar #me remembering that time i tricked my cousin into eating brussel sprouts. ehehehehe.#also!!! what the FUCK balthazar's voice is very difficult but also very fun and rewarding to write so PLEASE tell me whether it reads okay #my in my head: ive seen four year olds become territorial when their parents have visitors this is gonna be SO funny #anyway Jack IS going to get I love you's from all his dads thank you much. we just gotta wait for Cas.#this isn't going on ao3 until i have a good name for it so if you like reading better there suggest a fic name this time so it can go up

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billiewena · 3 years

Text

for the 100k fic celebration, here a portion of the “what if 10x05 had a sastiel agenda?” AKA lil shit sam/jealous dean destiel fic I first shared a while back! been having a lot of fun basically rewriting and expanding on the entire musical episode with new songs (and lots of cute kristen & siobhan moments because OF COURSE they’re still a couple.) it was really encouraging to see the positive response to it back then and it's been taking forever because of work/other writing but I’m so excited to have this one be the first full-length fics I ever post.

It starts with costumed teenagers locked in a tight embrace with absolutely no room for Jesus.

“What are they doing?”

Marie glances over her shoulder for only a brief second.

“Kids these days call it hugging,” she says slowly. Geez, it would’ve been less insulting for her to just outright say Wow, you’re old.

Except it’s not just any of the show’s stars hugging over there. One of them is the “Dean” who’d been mid-rehearsal when they arrived and looked more like Bieber than him with the blonde wig. And the other? Well, he would recognize that Columbo coat anywhere.

“Is that in the show?” he asks, pointing their way.

Marie quickly shakes her head at the accusation. “Oh, no. Siobhan and Kristen are a couple in a real life.”

He nods and lower his hand. Got it. That’s all it was. Everything’s fine. Nothing to worry about—

“No, my play explores the nature of Sastiel.”

“The — wait, what?” he says, confused at once.

“Sastiel?” Marie pauses, giving him a second to figure it out. He doesn’t. “You know, the relationship between Sam and Castiel?”

Dean blinks.

“Sam and…C-Cas?”

“I know, I know. Edlund’s series never finished. I’m lucky I got these drafts. Ugh, it’s Midnight Sun all over again. But the love story is all in the subtext,” she says with confidence. “Can you believe there are people who still think Destiel is endgame? After everything that happened after the angels fell? After Gadreel? Please.”

He silently sounds out the word. Des-tiel? Wait…

“Ever since Cas came back from the dead and took on Sam’s pain, I knew. I just knew. Every one of their arcs had been parallel to each other’s from their fall from grace to the trials. And now with Dean gone, all they have…is each other.”

Marie sighs. “Besides, you can’t spell subtext without S-E-X.”

He coughs and nearly chokes on an asteroid-sized lump in his throat.

“I…uh. Yeah, th-that’s not…you know, I think I’ve seen enough,” Dean says with a forced smile. “Thank you for your, ah, time. I’ll, uh, we’ll follow up if we have questions about the missing persons case. I—alright.”

And with that he purses his lips, turns on his heel and walks away — nearly tripping over one of the stage chords as he does. Why are there are so many of them anyways? This is just some all-girls school production, not the goddamn West End.

He finds Sam in his natural nerd habitat (the tech booth) sifting through all the bins of A/V supplies.

“Yeah, not to interrupt the blast from the past here but it’s time for us to go,” he says, patting the door.

His brother shoots him an annoyed look but packs up and follows him out all the same. Not that Dean bothers to wait for him; no, he makes a beeline for the car as soon as he leaves the booth.

“Hey, what’s with the rush?” Sam calls after him as he runs to catch up with him at the school entrance.

“No rush,” he says shortly. “Just wanted to see what you found out before you got too lost in the nerd sauce over there.”

He doesn’t need to look back to know he’s on the receiving end of a Classic Sam Bitchface right now and continues to stomp his way through the parking lot.

“Well, no EMF, no hex bags. None of their props are remotely hinky. Talked to Maeve and all those extras in the auditorium.” Sam finally catches up and walks side-by-side with him now. “You have any more luck?”

“Nah. Ms. Chandler's office is just a pile of empty bottles and regret. She's probably just face down in a bar somewhere. Or a ditch. I did get to hear all about the director’s, ah, creative vision though,” Dean says, teeth gritted. “Apparently we go into space, I become a woman, and there’s even ninjas and robots!”

“Robots. Huh. Well, that’d definitely be a new one.”

“There’s no robots in Supernatural—”

“I-I know that,” Sam says in exasperation. “I just mean it’s, y’know, innovative. And Dean we’ve fought weirder. Remember the teddy bear? The fairies? The ballet shoes?”

“Well, you just wait until you hear about what she in store for you, Lover Boy,” he says.

And that makes Sam do an instant double-take.

“Uh, Lover Boy?”

“Yeah, your number one fan back there —” he says, gesturing back towards the school, “— was telling me all about the play’s, uh, love story between you and Cas. You got something you’ve been meaning to tell me or what?”

“The love story? Wait, what do you mean me and Cas?”

Dean scoffs, already in utter disbelief of the words he was about to say. “Like you and Cas, together. Together together? Romance of the ages the way she made it sound. Apparently it’s all in her play!”

To his surprise though, Sam just… laughs. “Well, I mean hey, that’s an improvement from the ones who wrote about me and you.”

“You got that right,” he agrees with a shudder. Meeting one Becky the Stalker was bad enough. Knowing she wasn’t alone and that she had an audience made it even worse. “She even had a portmanteau for you, dude. Like you’re some celebrities in a grocery store tabloid. Sass-tiel.”

“Sass-tiel?” He seems to seriously consider it but shrugs. “I don’t know. What about… Samstiel? CasSam? Cam? Mmm, maybe not that…”

Dean groans. “Really? That’s your issue with this?”

“Of course it’s not my issue,” Sam says. He stays pensive for a few more seconds until chuckling again to himself this time, as if he’s the only one in on a private joke. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, Cas is great but…”

“Not your type?”

“Yeah, sure,” Sam says. No, it’s definitely more than that and he’s doing a piss-poor job of hiding his amused expression.

Dean turns and stares him down. “What?”

“I dunno,” he says, his smirk fully visible now. “I just think it’s funny they’re pairing me up with Cas when the one with the ‘profound bond’ with him is right there.”

“Oh, haha. You’re hilarious,” Dean retorts at once.

“Hey man, I’m not the one who stayed in Purgatory for a year to find him.”

His glare takes on a murderous edge.

“Okay. You know what? You’re going to do that thing where you just shut the hell up! Forever!”

Sam holds up his hands in either what’s either a show of innocence or surrender.

“Alright, alright. Well, other than the Charlie Kaufman of it all I got nothing.”

“So…what?” Dean says. “This-this all... This whole musical thing, everything, it's... it's all a coincidence? There is no case?”

“Unless you're seeing something I'm not, no, Dean. There's no case here,” he says sincerely this time.

“Come on. This has classic Trickster vibes all over it.” He almost wants to turn around and start yelling, Come on out Gabriel you bastard!

“Trickster’s dead, man. And he wasn’t just a trickster, he was an archangel. And they’re all gone too.”

“Could be a lower-rank angel?” Dean tries. “I mean, Zachariah pulled off an entire apocalypse world. And that place where we were both corporate drones. Before you know it, this’ll get all Buffy and it’ll be me and you singin’ and dancin’—“

“Dean…I think it’s just fans. Look, as long as they’re not putting another love spell on one of us I couldn’t really care less what they’re doing,” Sam says with some bitterness, clearly not looking back at that particular memory with any fondness. “Just writing some songs? I mean, it’s innocent enough.”

“Oh yeah, so innocent,” he scoffs. “They’re singing about our dead parents, your demon blood bender, the apocalypse, all of it! This is just…it’s make-believe for them! But it’s our lives!”

Sam runs a tired hand through his hair. “Look, I don’t get it either man. I wasn’t exactly thinking about the books’ entertainment value while Chuck was describing my sex life in vivid detail—“

“Don’t remind me,” he says, holding up a hand in disgust.

“—but I dunno. There’s obviously something about it they connected to, right? Something they related to, something that moved them, inspired them? And I guess…I mean, what’s wrong with that?”

There is so, so much wrong with that.

“I don’t know what story they’re reading and what Sam and Dean they’re ‘connecting’ to here. But it sure as hell ain’t us. I mean…they even made me blonde, dude.”

“It’s a high school play, what can you expect?” Sam laughs. “It was probably the closest wig they could find at Party City.”

Dean ignores him, muttering aloud as he makes his way to the driver’s seat.

“The hair…the singing…the robots… the love story…”

“You really were bothered by that, weren’t you?” Sam gives his brother a curious look.

“SUPERNATURAL ISN’T A ROMANCE!” Dean snaps. “Look, these girls obviously don’t know what they’re talking about—“

“I dunno, Dean,” Sam said in a clearly taunting voice now. “Maybe you’re just jealous of what me and Cas have.”

He flushes. “W-what? I-I’m not—“

“We could give you two a name too, y’know? So you don’t feel left out? What about…Dee-stiel? CasDean?”

And he refuses to entertain this conversation any longer.

“Shut your face! Get in the car!”

Thankfully Sam notices the shift in tone and obliges at once.

Dean, meanwhile, takes a moment outside the car to glance around — almost as if checking to see if anyone overheard that comment. Not that it mattered. Who could overhear? No one even knew they were THE Sam and THE Dean. Who cared? He certainly didn’t care. He didn’t care at all...

(to be continued)

#if you were one of the people who offered to beta read back in march know I WILL be reaching out to because I need it lol #destiel #destiel fanfic #destiel fanfiction #fanfic #spn 10x05 #also this is a given but if you did want to be tagged when this is posted hmu!#been having so much fun with this especially with writing the new songs #also tbh the musical itself is the closet I will get to writing a sam & cas fic so that's been fun too lol #ESPECIALLY because then I can immediately add dean's reaction to it which is typically 'time to walk straight off the stage'#it's also fun to write a s10 fic since I'm a 'dean's been in love since s8 at least' truther #anyways new to this and my untreated adhd means I make a gazillion typos/take forever to work on things/get distracted by new ideas but #literally every positive comment on that first post is the reason why I'm still workin' at it

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ghostlywritten · 3 years

Text

If Only I Had Stayed In The Shadows - Chapter Five

James Potter x OC

Words: 3,5k

Prologue Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four

Time flies fast when you have fun. And I had a lot of fun for a week after the party. Despite the harsh weather, despite the essays piling up, despite the training sessions getting tougher it was all worth it in the end when I was left alone in the Common Room with James, chatting about everything and anything. Occasionally even Sirius, Remus and Peter would join us if they weren't in the mood to go to sleep yet and we would play Chess or Exploding Snap.

Of course I knew I would never be part of their unique friendship quartet but I was glad they would let me join in on their fun from time to time. Though I suspected they mainly missed James and didn't want to abstain from him too much.

One particular evening left me alone with Sirius and a few empty bottles of Firewhiskey after Remus and Peter decided to head to bed early and James insisted on retrieving some midnight snacks, sneaking off with a Disillusionment Charm. How he had managed that spell when we hadn't learned it in class was beyond me. Anyways, this got to be the first time I had ever been in the lonely presence of the school's heartthrob with no one and nothing in the near vicinity to distract him from me.

I swallowed nervously whilst the dark-haired boy seemed pretty relaxed, his posture slouched in his armchair.

"You know, I do wonder sometimes how things come together," Sirius' voice cut into the silence and I looked up from my fiddling fingers in my lap to see him pensively watch the flames flicker around in the fireplace, the light giving his features a warm glow.

"In what way?" I asked quietly, not wanting to somehow interrupt his peaceful posture.

"I mean, the way things have turned out in the end," he said, waving his hand to gesture around us, "Everything that brought us to the point of sitting here in the Common Room of the Gryffindors in the middle of the night. I got the best friends I had ever imagined I would get. Ever." I smiled at this. "I'm a Gryffindor, which is the least likely house a Black would get in. I ran away from home and am living with my best friend the life and with the family I've always dreamt of." Now this wasn't exclusive news. Everyone knew about Sirius' escape from the Black House last summer and that he was staying at the Potter's. I was sure a lot of people had their opinions on it but were clever enough to not voice them out, at least not with any Marauder nearby.

I was a little surprised however that he opened up about it when he had refused to say anything on the matter for the past months. One glance at the empty bottles on the table gave me the answer though. 'Everyone gets a loose tongue after a few drinks. Good thing I don't drink...much.'

"I'm glad you are out of there," I said sincerely, recalling the one time I had been pushed into the boy's locker room by my fellow female, giggling team members and had caught a glimpse of the many bruises on his back. I didn't know why but I immediately had a hunch that those hadn't only been from Quidditch. They had looked too nasty. My attempts to talk about child abuse with him were instantly cut off by the boy himself, the cold glare still giving me chills even in mere memory.

"Me too," Sirius sighed blissfully, "The Potter's are truly the best."

"Now all that is missing is the future Mrs. Black," I teased.

He wiggled his eyebrows, "I have encountered a lot of worthy candidates so far. Wanna be next?"

"Thanks, but I'd rather not catch anything," I replied, wiggling my eyebrows back at him. He gave me a mock affronted look before he smirked devilishly, my breath catching involuntarily at the handsome enhancement of his features, "Don't worry, I wouldn't ever date the future Mrs. Potter."

I almost choked on my spit, "Excuse me?"

"Oh, you heard me just right," he barked out a laugh at my red face, "And you can't tell me there is nothing going between you two."

"Ehm, I can because there is nothing going on between us," I retaliated, forcing down the blush from my cheeks.

"You don't have to hide it from me," Sirius said with a shrug, his shit-eating grin still ever so present on his face and I grimaced at him, "I don't blame you. And the Potter's are the best family you can meet."

"Sounds like heaven," I replied deadpanned and he nodded his head with wide eyes and a straight grin before he reached for his forgotten half-empty glass of Firewhiskey. Sobering up slightly, I pondered on my next words before voicing them out carefully, "Don't you miss your actual family though?"

"Hm?" Sirius hummed but I knew he had heard me clearly, stalling as he took a long sip of his drink.

"You don't have to answer that if you don't want to," I added hastily when I noticed how his features hardened, "I'm just a curious cat, wondering if I could ever leave my family like that."

"Do they abuse you mentally and physically every hour of the day?"

"Ehm...no."

"Then you don't have to wonder about it," Sirius said darkly, "You can consider yourself one of the luckiest people on earth." I kept quiet, watching him close his eyes and breathe in deeply through his nose. 'Maybe I should have just kept quiet like always,' I thought, mentally kicking my tactless ass.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked," I apologised softly, looking down at my lap awkwardly. Hearing him sigh made me peek at him through my lashes, "It's okay, Cec." I beamed in relief at the nickname. "My family is just a touchy subject."

"I get it, you don't want anything to do with them," I agreed quickly, trying not to agitate him further.

"It's not that I don't want to...," he sighed for the umpteenth time, rubbing his eyes tiredly, "I just can't deal with them anymore. And Reg..."

"Regulus Black? Your brother, right?" I asked, having heard that name before. Apparently, he took after his brother, being the heartthrob of his year and part of the Slytherin Quidditch team albeit a Seeker.

"Yeah, my little brother," the dark-haired boy said, a smile unconsciously lifting the corner of his lips before they dropped into a bitter frown, "Of course, he is just as brainwashed as the rest of them, all thanks to our dear mother," he almost spat the last word and I winced at the hatred in his tone. At this point, it almost sounded like he was talking to himself, barely realising the other presence in his proximity. "I wish he would have just come with me," he mumbled, a vulnerable look on his face.

"You could still try to be close to him," I offered a weak suggestion, which he immediately dismissed with a scoff/hiccup. "Yeah, right. As if he would listen to me after I ran away. He won't even look my way anymore."

"But-"

"Don't think I haven't tried. He even said we weren't brothers right when I left." I frowned at the crack in his voice, my heart squeezing slightly at the pain in his eyes. Who would have known how much he suffered under all that loud and playful facade of his.

"Maybe he was just mad that you were leaving him behind," I pondered softly, racking my brain about how to make him feel better, "Sometimes we say things in the heat of the moment that we don't really mean." Sirius kept quiet, pensively watching the flames as he refused to make eye contact. I looked away from him, figuring he wouldn't like eyes on him at his vulnerable state, "I think, you two could still be close despite all the differences."

"...You really think so?"

"Yeah, one of you just has to make the first move."

"How do I know he won't reject me?" he asked like a small child, the armchair he sat on suddenly looking too big for him.

I thought it over. The possibility of rejection was definitely there, I wouldn't lie to him about it. After all I knew nothing about his brother's personality. "You don't," I responded, "But the world is full of lonely people waiting for the other to make the first move. And so many bonds get lost because of it. Don't you think that's sad?" His grey eyes snapped over to mine for the first time we had started this serious talk, surprise flickering through them before they were set into something akin to determination.

Before he could open his mouth to say anything though, James came bustling through the portrait hole, his arms packed with various snacks as he giggled like a fool. "Dig in, guys!" he cheered, dropping everything on the coffee table and just like that the serious mood was broken.

I watched Sirius pick up some cookies, munching on them as he chatted up a storm with James about the upcoming Quidditch match. By now, I knew it had been mostly the alcohol that made him spill everything. I just hoped he wouldn't feel too awkward about it the next morning.

The game against Slytherin had packed a punch. The Hufflepuffs' Bludgers were nothing against their aggressive tactics.

Let's just say no player got out there unscathed and the Snitch got caught by Regulus Black - the Slytherin Seeker - just before Angie managed to get a goal that would have gotten us a win if it had only been a few seconds earlier.

I rubbed my sore side where a Bludger had hit me at the beginning of the game as we went inside the locker room, the Slytherins celebrating on the field and laughing at our backs.

"Worst game ever," Frank, who was trudging next to me, muttered and I nodded wordlessly, my eyes watching the stiff back of our Captain as he led us into the little hut.

"This game was pathetic!" James hissed as soon as the door closed to our locker room, "Nothing worked the way we have practiced. Sirius, Frank where the hell were you two when they rained the Bludgers down the Chasers?"

"I-" Sirius started but James continued, still heated, "Oliver? You're the Keeper, right? You are supposed to keep the Quaffles out of the hoops and not hit them through!"

"I didn'-"

"And Angie? Were you even on the field? I couldn't bloody see you once near the opposite hoops."

"James, I was trying everything," Angie protested next to me, "The Slytherin Chasers w-"

"Don't even try any excuses on me," James spat agitated, "I know you want to quit after break but the way you play makes me think you want me to kick you out right now."

"James," I spoke up astonished as Angie sat back with a pissed off look. I knew he could get angry from past experiences during matches but that was straight out rude. "Calm down, we all tried our best."

"Tried your best?" the boy hissed, and I resisted the urge to tell him he sounded like a snake. No, that would probably make him madder, "If that's your best you can say bye-bye to your dreams of becoming a professional Chaser, Cecily. Not even the Montrose Magpies would want you!"

My eyes widened in surprise, his words cutting a knife through my chest.

"James," Sirius started this time, his gaze actually serious for once as I deflated into my seat, feeling more hurt than I had expected, "It's enough now."

The Captain sighed heavily, pinching the bridge of his nose to calm himself. "Fine. Get dressed, we will talk about this at practice next week. Whoever needs to go to the Hospital Wing, stay back. We will go together."

I jumped out of my seat as soon as he dismissed us, rushing towards the girls' room to take a shower and change, his words repeating in my head like a mantra.

"Don't take him seriously," Angie soothed, interrupting the silence around us, "He always gets pissy when we lose a game."

"I know," I said with a sigh, wincing when I touched my side. Angie grimaced at the already bruising spot, "You should get that checked by Madam Pomfrey."

Nodding in agreement, we walked out together.

"Don't you wanna wait for the others?" Angie asked as I kept walking. "No, let's just go," I said over my shoulder, forcing her to concede when I didn't stop.

"Ms. Grant," Poppy greeted me, "It's been a while. I hope you realise, neither the sweets nor Mr. Potter have changed my mind, no matter how persuasive the Pixie Puffs can be."

"It's not that," I replied, shaking my head at Angie when she gave me a questioning look, "I just need to get my side checked."

"Ah, the Quidditch match between Slytherin and Gryffindor has been today, right?" Poppy remarked, frowning at the sight of my bruise when I lifted my shirt, "Honestly, this game should be banished from school. It always gets way out of control."

"Still nothing that you can't fix," I replied, watching her shuffle through her cupboards after setting me down on one of the beds.

"What was that about Pixie Puffs and Potter?" Angie asked as we waited.

"Just me unsuccessfully trying to get an internship here at the Hospital Wing," I explained quietly as the doors of the Wing opened once more to reveal the other players trudging inside, pushing aside the few Slytherin players that tried to walk in as well. Luckily, they were in too much of a good mood to stir up a fight like they usually would, instead opting to just verbally make fun of the boys in the background.

"Didn't I tell you to wait?" James asked annoyed as he sat down on the unoccupied bed next to us.

"Yes, and I didn't," I snapped back, pissed off at both him and the pain in my side. James opened his mouth, but Sirius clasped his hand on his shoulder, shaking his head. Shooting the grey-eyed boy a grateful look I turned around as Poppy came back, gesturing for me to lift my shirt. I obeyed, hissing as she applied some balm on the bruise but sighing immediately in relief as the pain diminished into a dull ache. "Apply this once more tonight and it should all be well by tomorrow," the matron instructed as she handed me the tube and I thanked her with a quick smile before I hopped off to leave. Bidding the others goodbye, I ignored James' lingering look, particularly at my bruised side, and left to have a quick dinner and head to bed.

This day had been exhausting enough.

The following days were miserable to say the least. The Slytherins were still gloating about their win, classes were hell as nothing went into my brain and on top of that I wasn't on speaking terms with James and therefore, the rest of the Marauders as well.

It wasn't like I didn't want to, but his words had left a sting more painful than the bruise on my side; Bringing up my deepest desire and throwing it back in my face was a big no-go. I almost regretted opening up to him like that and the more days passed with him not talking to me the more I wished I hadn't ever walked up to the Quidditch pitch for that game with a little extra-confident swagger in my steps.

I also wished I didn't have to attend the regular Quidditch practices; James was more commanding than usual, which led us to double laps and longer simulated games until it was pitch black outside. The only bright side was that at least Sirius tried to cheer us all up and even occasionally chatted with me in-between breaks.

"I think something is wrong with Peanut," I mused, adjusting my grip.

"Something is wrong with what?" Sirius asked perplexed.

"Peanut," I repeated, gesturing towards my broom. The dark-haired boy stared at me. "You...named your broomstick Peanut?" he asked slowly, uncomprehending.

"Yeah, why?"

"Just- no matter," he dismissed quickly, his lips twitching in amusement, "Why don't you tell James that something is wrong with Peanut? He can fix it."

Raising a brow, I stated, "First of, Peanut is a splendid name for a broomstick." I rolled my eyes as he burst out into small barks of laughter. "Secondly, I'm not on speaking terms with our dear Captain right now and you know that."

"Yes, I do." It was his turn to roll his eyes. "And I still think it's ridiculous."

"It's not! He mocked me!" I protested.

"Yeah, but weren't you the one, who told me that people say things they don't mean in the heat of the moment?"

I narrowed my eyes at him, "I don't appreciate you using my words against me!"

Sirius grinned before he turned sirius again, "He was angry, and I can safely say that he did not mean a single thing he's said back then."

"And why isn't he talking to me then? He hasn't even apologised!"

"Because he is also proud ass. Or rather, he doesn't know how to approach you," Sirius snickered and my eyes widened in surprise.

"He doesn't know how to approach me?"

"Yeah, he thinks you are angry at him-" "Which I am!" "-and he is still trying to figure out how to apologise." I stayed quiet, watching the subject of our conversation fly around the field, giving instructions to each player. "If you let it up to him, I would say he will work up his courage by the end of the year. At the earliest."

Later that evening, I decided to stay up after dinner. The others went to bed quickly whilst I sat on my bed with my broom on my lap, contemplating whether I should go down or not. I didn't even know if James still waited at the fireplace as I hadn't been there the past few days but figured it couldn't hurt to try.

Putting my robe over the sleeping clothes, I softly padded outside, carefully taking a peek around the corner into the Common Room after walking down the hallway. The space was empty except for one lonely person lounging on the loveseat in front of the warm fire, the sight achingly familiar.

Swallowing nervously, I gripped my broomstick tighter as I headed down the stairs with purposefully loud steps (as far as possible with socks on). His glass-rimmed eyes snapped over, widening, and he immediately sat up when I approached him.

"Hey James," I greeted him awkwardly, holding my broom in front of me with both hands, almost as a form of protection.

"Hey Cec," he breathed out as if in relief, his eyes rapidly flickering from me to the broom and back to me.

"Um-"

"Come sit," he offered quickly, patting the seat next to him and I obliged, relaxing and simultaneously feeling nervous at the proximity, "Why do you have Peanut with you?"

"Oh, right. Ehm, I think something is wrong with it," I explained, handing it over at his request, "It's not turning as smoothly as it used to."

"Hm, 'might have gotten tweaked during the last game," James mused, brows furrowed in concentration as he examined every inch, "It got hit by a lot of Bludgers, didn't it? Bloody Slytherins. But nothing I can't fix."

"Yeah, I figured that was the cause," I nodded in agreement and his eyes flickered over to me, the fire giving his irises a honey-coloured tone. "What about you?" he asked softly, "Is your side doing better?"

"Perfectly healed, thanks," I informed him, melting slightly on the inside at his concern, "You know Poppy." He cracked a grin at the nickname (causing my heart to miss a beat) before looking back down at the broom, his gaze turning serious.

"Cecily, I...wanted to- you know- I kind of said some messed up things after the game," he stammered slightly, fiddling with the broomstick nervously. My features relaxed at his nervous state and I allowed a small smile as he continued, "I really shouldn't have said what I said- you know the thing with the Montrose Magpies and you- and everything else I said to the others, I didn't mean any of it and I will never do it again, I solemnly swear! I guess, what I'm trying to say- and what I've been trying to say the past few days, but I didn't know how- well first, I figured I should probably give you some space since I never do that with Evans and she always gets madder and madder, but-"

"James," I cut him off and he immediately shut his mouth, "It's alright."

His brown eyes widened, "Really?"

"Yeah, I get it. It's okay."

"You are not mad anymore?" he asked tentatively, staring incredulously as I shook my head, "It's that easy?"

"Well, it can be," I replied with a grin before sighing, "I just don't wanna be mad anymore." And I missed his presence. But hush.

James also sighed, in relief as he leaned back. "Good, I don't think I could have waited any longer."

"Waited? For what?"

"Asking you out, of course."

This time, I really choked on my spit.

Chapter Six

#James Potter #james potter x oc #james potter x reader #james potter imagine #james potter fanfiction #marauders imagine #sirius black #remus lupin #Lily Evans #marauders era #marauders fanfiction #marauders fic #harry potter imagine #marlene mckinnon #Marauders

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bedtimebrain · 3 years

Text

EXO Baekhyun: Cry for Love Part 1

Boldly writing this very unlikely scenario about baek. Part of me just feels like there might be a part of baek that might be in such a situation if he ever feels so deeply for someone that is not be able to handle the stress of dating an idol.

Using the song title of one of my favourite songs from his latest album for this~ there’s going to be 2 parts(hopefully not 3), and just a disclaimer the ending might not be fluff, so don’t get started if you’re not prepared !

Edit: Part 2 is up! (No part 3 tho, thankfull)

Part 2

Characters: Baek x You

Baekhyun finds himself falling for you, but feels he cannot be so selfish to put the burdens of dating an idol upon you. In an attempt to control his feelings, he tries to stay away from you

Standing across the narrow road opposite to Wendy Cafe, Baekhyun looked intently inside, with a sort of sourness at the back of his throat. This is at least 5th time this guy has been here, and it’s been the second time this week already. His inner self was literally scowling at that thought, but what could he do?

His phone that vibrated in his pocket called him out of his thoughts. It was a call from his manager, asking him to return to the SM building.

Taking one last look at you, at the guy, and at the cafe, he placed both his hands back in his pocket, head facing down and walked back to where his car was.

During the ride back, he thought long and hard, was this the right thing to do? Just 4 months ago, was the first step into the cafe the beginning to this unwanted path ?

He can’t help but replay once again all that started 4 months ago...

——

‘Bye! See you next week!’

Ending his gym session for the week, baekhyun headed for the carpark, eager to get there quickly. Today, he was to be home for a family dinner.

He had been up till late yesterday, practicing and preparing for EXO’s new album. With just 4hours of sleep, his ruined body clock woke him up in time for a gym session in the afternoon. Beating himself to be disciplined so that he can show his best image to Eris during the comeback, he got himself to the gym.

But now, the sweat from the gym session coupled with his sleep debt, was making him feel extra sleepy.

Needing some caffeine in his system, he stopped his car by the roadside to search up coffee houses nearby. Scrolling through, Starbucks -too crowded , dal.kom- he was not a fan , Daebak Coffee and Tea - seems very popular among reviews, Wendy Cafe - no reviews.

Feeling it’s best to avoid crowded cafes on a Friday afternoon, he decided to give Wendy Cafe a try. Following the voice of Google maps, he found himself along a narrow road, secluded and outcasted from the bustling roads just 2 minutes ago.

‘Am I at the right place? Why would someone open a cafe here?’ He loudly spoke in a typical monologue with himself

Just as he was about to give up, a small signboard peeked out from the brick wall stretching along the road.

‘Ah yes, found you! I hope I didn’t make the wrong choice’

After parking his car, he crossed the road to the cafe.

Wendy’s Cafe was clad in wood and white, wooden tables, white chairs, surrounded by grey walls. It was so small only about 6 people could be seated by the tables. To make up for it, a counter-side table was made available and soft music played in the background. Walking in, Baekhyun felt a comfortable sense of peace and relax.

‘Hello, 1 Ice Americano please’

‘Hello, that will be $5.. omo’ Just as you looked up at him, you were shocked to recognise him as Baekhyun from EXO. But you quickly recovered in time, taking the money from him and continued your chores.

Seeing that you have recognised him, he nodded politely. He appreciated your politeness and professionalism to not overreact. And proceed to wait patiently for his coffee.

‘Thank you, have a nice day’ you smiled brightly at him and handed the coffee over.

Just then, it started pouring heavily outside, stopping Baekhyun in his tracks.

‘Should I drive back now ? It’s a long journey back and it’s raining so heavily ...’ he thought

‘Do you want to wait out the rain instead? It’s not too safe to drive in such heavy rain. No one comes here on rainy days, I can put out the close sign for you if you like’

You asked rather sincerely

Looking out again at the rain, he weighed his choices. He was going to be drenched if he crossed the road but what if you were one of those fans that would expose where he was to everyone?

He was feeling a little suspicious inside, afterall why would you close the shop to business just for him?

‘You can take the table furthest away from the window if you’re worried’

He looked at you, judging a book by it’s cover. And decided it doesn’t appear like you would turn out to be one of those crazy fans and took the option of waiting out the rain.

His phone was running out of battery, so instead of sitting by the corner table all bored and lonely, Baekhyun sat on the bar counter table instead; facing you and the other male employee who were busy with fresh bakes.

You presented a bite size muffin on a white plate and gave it over to him. ‘It’s on the house, we’re not going to have any more customers anyway’

Being curious since the start, he asked ‘why would your boss open a cafe right here? It’s really not the best location to be attracting people right?’

Laughing slightly, you replied

‘My boss? That would be me, and does this cafe look like I want to attract people in? The tables are all for 2s, I’m just encouraging solitude here’

‘You own this place? Wow I would suppose you’re only in your early 20s right? Anyway this place does give a sense of quietness that we dont quite get outside. I like it’ He lively replied

‘Yeah, I just wanted people that come by to be able to stop and find quietness they don’t get anywhere else. Finding time for themselves to be away from noisy city life just a few minutes away’

Not really having anything to say to that deep thought of yours, he simply replied ‘Ahh... I see. Uh, thanks for muffin, it smells tasty’

You smiled politely and left him to himself as you cleaned up the open kitchen.

The rain that was beating the ground outside was almost like a lullaby to Baekhyun. The warmth of the shop and the music aided the rain and drowsy effects he was having, shortly without knowing, he drifted to sleep. --

‘Baekhyun ssi, Baekhyun ssi’ you tapped him lightly till he woke up

‘It stopped raining, do you want to head off’

‘Oh my , can’t believe I slept, but that was certainly the quietness I need, haha. I’ll be leaving. Thank you for the coffee’

As he left, he thought to himself that he will surely be back.

—

A week later, he came back. On that day, he saw from outside that you were casually sitting down by on of the tables, chatting with a middle age office lady.

Opening the door, he caught your attention and you smiled slightly to acknowledge. As you were the only working employee today, you got up from the table to serve him.

‘Hi Baekhyun ssi, I see you’re back. Ice americano for you? Or would you like to try something else? Wendy’s special for a bright sunny day’

‘Sure I’ll go for the Wendy’s special’

Handing over the coffee to baekhyun, you asked

‘I heard EXO’s preparing for a comeback. How’s it going for you?’

‘Did you search up on EXO after you saw me last week? Hahaha. Anyway it’s fine, it’s just the discipline in diet, exercise and health that’s annoying’

‘I see. And nah, don’t make me sound like a stalker fan please. I just moderately keep up with kpop in general’

‘Anyway is the middle age lady there your friend? Or do you just chat with your customers all the time?’

‘Oh, she’s just a customer. Really depends though, some people come here seeming to have heavy thoughts, sometimes when I notice I’ll just casually chat with them. Some others are here really putting up a do not disturb sign. Those I wouldn’t bother’

Being cheeky, Baekhyun asked ‘what about me?’

You thought for a while before answering

‘Like a cat? Like those I would give some affection to before letting them run off so they don’t start scratching me. I mean not saying you would be aggressive, but rather, I’m sure a good balance of chat and quietness would be best for you’

Raising his brows and thinking through what you just said, he smiled after a while and went on sipping his Wendy’s special by the counter again. Occasionally, he would look up from his phone to chat with you.

—-

For that 1 month, it seems like he started developing a routine to drop by your cafe for short breaks. He enjoyed your company and somehow your cafe seemed like a place of comfort and refuge. With you, he could talk about anything, from the laughters to the deep insides. Over there, the burdens of being an idol is always momentarily lifted.

On the first week of the 2nd month you guys met. He dropped by again, only to find that the lights were off. A little surprised, he went up to the door which pasted a notice

‘the shop will be closed till further notice due to the owner’s personal reasons. Sorry for any inconvenience caused’

His regular high spirits whenever he came by was dampened as he read the notice. Turning back, he headed off.

The next two weeks, he drove by repeatedly, at least 2 times a week, but your shop was still closed.

It made him a little worried, did something happen to you? But seeing how you left this shop behind with just a notice also made him feel a little down, strangely. It made him think that was he nothing but just a customer to you? He had thought you guys were friends, friends with a special bond, one who he could tell everything to, and place so comfortable almost like his home sofa. But the sign that hung coolly by the cafe’s door left no sign of that friendship held.

Whenever he wasn’t working or was by himself, he pondered over what happened to you. Looking at his phone, he suddenly felt a disconnect. You both knew so many things bout each other but not each other’s numbers. There was nothing to call to reach you. Wherever you are, were you thinking about what you left behind?

He thought to himself

let’s not be too invested into this coincidental friendship

He made up his mind, tomorrow he was going to make a final intentional trip down. If you were still closed, he told himself he would never drop by intentionally again just to check if you were open.

—-

Driving by the next day, his heart was beating fast. And was as if the heavens heard his words, the lights of your cafe were on.

The sign outside still hung closed, but he walked briskly over and stood by the door. You saw him and beckoned him inside.

‘Hey! What’s up with you? Where did you go? ’ Within him he heaved a sigh of relief, finally seeing you again. But his heart wouldn’t stop racing as he waited for your answer. Looking at your face, he can’t help but notice you’ve lost some weight, making him a little worried.

‘Hey Baekhyun ssi, it’s nice seeing you again’

You smiled at him your normal smile and there was no hint of anything extra apart from the normal customer service you gave him. Your lukewarm reply bothered him a little, was he the only one who considered you both as friends? That thought came but left quickly

‘I went home to visit my parents, unfortunately I fell ill. Pneumonia.. Got me in bed for a really long time’

‘Oh no, no wonder you lost some weight? I hope you’re feeling much better already. But you’re not opened today?’

‘Yes I just came back to tidy up this place.’

Not really wanting to leave yet, he offered to clean the place for you, also worried you might not be feeling the most recovered yet.

‘Do you want to have dinner together tonight?’ Baekhyun asked on impulse.

You looked up, a little surprise, but didn’t reject it.

‘Probably not at restaurants or something though. Delivery , do you mind?’ He added

You were never someone who seemed bothered about such trivial things, as expected you agreed.

Over dinner Baekhyun was his chirpy self again, telling you about all he wanted to say the few weeks you guys didn’t met. You listened to him without much words, only saying words when it mattered, as usual.

As you guys were eating and chatting, there came a point where a comfortable silence settled between you both.

Till you broke it

‘Baekhyun ssi, can I share something with you?’

Though he wasn’t expecting this, he was ready to listen.

‘Go ahead’

‘When I went back, I found out my one and only best friend had died in a car accident. And no one told me because they were afraid I wouldn’t be able to handle it alone in Seoul. He.. was all I had.. when I was bullied because people thought I was weird... when I didn’t fit in... he.. he..’ you couldn’t continue as you burst into uncontrollable tears.

Handling such situations was definitely not something Baekhyun was most comfortable with. Catching him off guard, he internally panicked, Omo, what do I do. What should I say? Deciding the only appropriate thing to do was to pat your back or your head. He reached out and gently comfort you, feeling a little awkward.

After a good 3 minutes you finally calmed down. But still, Baekhyun didn’t exactly know what to say to a crying girl

‘Are you feeling better? Care for some BingBing now? Ice cream cannot solve your problems, but it’s sweet at least ’

You managed a laugh, and Baekhyun went to the kitchen fridge to pull out the ice cream that came with the dinner earlier.

On the drive home, Baekhyun decided that sometimes a friend is the ultimate remedy to sorrow. And as much as you have been there to hear him out, he wanted to pay it back to you too.

——

But slowly, their comeback preparations were getting more and more hectic. He no longer had the liberty of time to plan what he wanted to do. But today, there was a short 2 hour interval of free time and they were free to do whatever they wanted.

Deciding between whether to crash at dance practice room or to head to your cafe, he decided to do the latter instead. Though he was feeling rather tired, it has been at least 3 weeks since he came by to say hi. He left after telling suho he’ll be back swiftly.

—

Reaching your cafe, he was surprised to see you smiling and laughing so heartily as you were chatting by the counter with a fashionable young man. When you both spoke, you were always giving him polite smiles and laughters, somewhat out of manners? It somehow hurt his pride a little that while he still thought about you when he was away, did you just think of him as a normal customer who would just come and go? It made him feel like his spot in the cafe was easily replaceable.

As he entered, you did not even break away from the conversation you have with the young man. Only until he reached the counter did you look up.

‘Ah! It’s you! It’s been really long! What would you like today ?’

‘6 Iced americanos, thank you’

‘Alright you can take a seat at the corner table first’ handing him his change , you pointed him to the one at the furthest end of the shop.

He came by having the intention to have a short catch up with you, but apart from the exchange of greetings you had pointed him so far away from the counter and busily went off to prepare the amercianos as if he really was just another customer. He laughed a little bitterly and went to sit where you told him to.

When you were done, you brought the coffee to him and dropped to a whisper suddenly.

‘Baekhyun ssi, are you doing well? Sorry I had to cut our conversation short at the counter because of the oppa sitting there. Didn’t want to bring you trouble in case I accidentally say your name’

Smacking himself on the head internally for being so sensitive earlier on, inside of him also wondered what kind of magic does that ‘oppa’ have for you to be so comfortable? The friendship has almost been 3 months but there always seem to be a strange distance between the both of you. Baekhyun knew himself that his personally was not one people found hard to warm up to and neither did he take very long to warm up to others. He was confused, how sometimes your friendship felt so close yet sometimes so far.

‘How have you been? That guy’s your new customer friend?’

‘Not too bad, I started attending some baking classes and in my free time now I just read as usual. Nothing much as changed.

Yeh he’s been coming quite often because he’s back in this area to visit his parents and there’s nothing for him to do’

‘Ahhhh so what kind of customer is he?’ He arrowhead his eyes at him then back to you.

Laughing you replied ‘ just a really funny and nonsensical kind. Kind of just reminds me of my childhood friend I told you about.... oh right, there’s something I want to give you’

Rushing to the kitchen then quickly walking out, you handed him a box. You explained

‘Baekhyun ssi that day I was at a mall and i walked by this tea shop and I dont know why,I thought about you. It’s all without caffeine. I know you’re having your comeback now and you should be really busy. I purposely picked out some that would help you sleep, some that would revitalise you and just some others that could just help you relax.

I’ve kept it for so long but you didn’t come by again. I almost just kept it for myself already.. anyway I’m glad you’re here today so I could pass it to you’

Hearing this from you really made him touched on the inside, but on the outside he didn’t really know let those emotions show. Instead, he merely said

‘Thanks y/n ssi , for thinking about me. I’ll use them well.’ Looking at his watch , he added,

‘I got to go now, see you sometime soon!’

After saying the goodbyes, Baekhyun returned to his car. Setting his Americanos aside, he held the gift in his hand and looked through his driver’s window at you.

At that very moment he finally came to terms with his feelings.

He did not just want a friendship with you, he wanted you as a partner he could tell his everything to, someone that belonged to him and someone he belonged to.

This should make him feel happy and elated, warm and fuzzy. But there was discomfort lying in his heart.

Deep down he knew that desiring anything more than a friendship with you was putting chains on you.

You liked quietness and freedom. But in his world, parts of his life are made public and his freedom was not really freedom at all.

He cannot sink deeper into this, but could he stay away ? His heart clenched.

He tossed the gift aside and drove off.

—

To be continued!!

Sorry for stopping at such an awkward place, but I couldn’t find a good place to stop this at, hahaha.

Anw, I’m sure you guys already know bout baek’s medical condition? My respect and love for baek just hit another level. I really think we are such lucky fangirls to be stanning someone like him. The effort he puts in for us is above and beyond what is required. Sigh. Baek I hope you know we really appreciate you💛

Tag(s): @wooya1224

Edit: Part 2

#baekhyun #exo fanfic #exo #exo scenario #exo scenarios #byun baekhyun #bambi #baekhyun bambi #baekhyun fanfic #baekhyun scenario #baekhyun scenarios

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miss-choco-chips · 3 years

Text

Twisted Soulmate shorts.

Listen, I do plan on making a sequel eventually, but in the meantime, can I tempt you with some half assed bits of Tim’s life as Ra’s Bonded/Bride/Unwilling Sugar baby? All in the spirit of putting off studying for my finals :D

~.~

“We need some ground rules”, Tim stated plainly, staring at the fiery hell in front of them. By his side, Ra’s sipped his wine glass, as cozy in front of all the destruction as one would standing by a fireplace. He looked ready to break out the s'mores. “Some Do’s and Do not’s, with penalties for each one we break. So, you know. We don’t completely destroy each other.”

“Be honest with me, Beloved, would that actually stop you from infringing damage to my properties?”

In the spirit of good sportsmanship, Tim actually thought about it for a few minutes.

~.~

Or; Tim elopes with Ra’s and commits to his role as the world’s most unimpressed, reluctant bride ‘soulmate’. Featuring Pru (who is having entirely too much fun), four little minions (whoever catches the reference and knows which fandom I stole them from gets brownie points) and absolutely no sign of any bats to spoil Tim’s fun.

~.~

The robe was green, and that was a problem. It wasn’t itchy, it wasn’t uncomfortable, it wasn’t restrictive.

But it was green.

Pru’s eyes found his in the mirror, a scowl and a smirk facing each other. Tim crossed his arms, the exquisite silk not even creasing, and his frown deepened. One of the robe’s sleeves covered him from shoulder to wrist, the other leaving the opposite limb completely bare. The intent was obvious enough, one mark on display, the others hidden away like dirty secrets.

So why the need for that branding color?

“Isn’t this excessive? Putting a collar on me may be easier, for his purpose.”

“Should I forward that idea to the Master?”

“Only if you want another punch to the nose.”

A snort, and Pru took the two steps keeping her at his back. Her hand dropped to his shoulder, and the expression on the assassin’s face changed to a far more serious one.

“Are you sure you want to do this? I could help you out of the base. Still owe you a few, we can call this one even for that time in Budapest.”

Tim’s scowl went away, a contemplative look on his eyes as they lowered to the ground.

“I’m not sure of anything nowadays, Pru. Except perhaps that I don’t want to wear this color.”

Her grip tightened for a second, two, three. Then, her eyes flew to the window and back to him before her next words came out, fake smirk back on place.

“Well then, the Master expects you to join him for breakfast. We’ll be moving bases soon, and I think he wanted to give you the tour before that.”

Tim’s eyes, that had followed hers to the window, stayed there, guarded and cold like they never were. He nodded.

“I’ll be there shortly. Just need to… fix my appearance a bit.”

She nodded, her smirk more sincere now, and left his bedchambers.

The shadows jumped into the room before the door was even halfway closed.

A little over half an hour later, Ra’s Al Ghul looked up from the reports he was revising, cup of tea still untouched on the table, pastries and fruits perfectly distributed in front of him, to watch the Detective approach.

His robe was a curious maroon.

As if sensing his question, the young man took his place across from the Demon’s head, placid smile softening his features despite ice cold eyes boring into his.

“Oh, this?”, demurely, he raised the covered arm, accepting the coffee one of his servants provided. The sleeve slipped down enough to show three names on white skin, but Ra’s eyes strayed to the clothe. He knew that shade of brownish.

“I could have sworn I sent you green robes, Detective. I do wonder, where did you find a dye?”

“As I’m sure Pru can tell you, noses bleed a lot. On the bright side, you don’t have to worry about sending a clean up crew to tidy up my bedchambers. Nice morning workout, too, thank you.”

Amused despite himself, Ra’s threw his head back and laughed.

----.---

“Be honest with me, Beloved, would that actually stop you from infringing damage to my properties?”

In the spirit of good sportsmanship, Tim actually thought about it for a few minutes. “I mean, as long as you respect my boundaries, I won’t have a reason to show my displeasure.”

“And what about my boundaries? It’s only reasonable that for each rule you decide on, I get to demand one of my own making.”

“If they don’t conflict with mine, I guess I could learn to work around them. Considering what you do for a living, it’s not like you can ask for more.”

Ra’s tilted his head, as if saying ‘yeah, fair’. They watched the flames consuming one of Ra’s favored castles in silence for a while longer. The parisian authorities would be arriving soon, though no before they were ready to leave; Ra’s wouldn’t allow any interruptions.

They were probably making the ninja standing guard behind them uncomfortable, with the silence, veiled threats and mind games. Except for Pru. She’d be thriving in her fellows’ fear.

“Should we go somewhere more private to decide this rules, Timothy?”

A shake, long raven locks hitting the air like small whips, and the young hero turned on his heel to go back to the plane waiting for them.

“I need some time to think them over. I’ll let you know when I decide.”

---.---

Is the Demon’s Head, instead, who demands the first one.

“You will allow a squad of my people around you at all times, Detective, and you’ll let them tend to you as it’s becoming of my bride.”

“If you ever call me your bride again”, states the young man, calmly turning a page on the book he was reading, curled up in the armchair Ra’s had specifically made his men drag into his office for the sole purpose of tempting him into staying put and in Ra’s direct line of sight, “the next base I make go boom will be the one you’re in at that moment.”

“My soulmate.”

“Still creepy, but significantly less; I’ll accept it. What were you saying about bodyguards? The answer is no, by the way, but I thought it would be fair to let you explain your reasoning before shooting you down again.”

“I have no need for explaining myself; you were the one to suggest rules. This is merely the first one. As it is, and since you asked so nicely, I’ll tell you that, as my bonded, you have a price in your head so high even the purest of heart man would be tempted to hunt you down. It’s merely for your safety, as I worry so.”

The dirty look the younger gives him over his book shows him exactly what he thinks of Ra’s obvious jab at his abilities and strength.

“There’s also the matter of your lack of sleep, or the blatant underweight you’re showing.”

“I don’t need a nanny nor a bodyguard, Ra’s.”

“Maybe so, but what would my enemies think of my power if I couldn’t spare a few men to protect my bonded? You can think of it as a political tactic, if it’ll lay your worries at rest. It won’t be to spy on you, as I already have a team dedicated to that.”

Not even a blink, of course he knew, he’d be an idiot to think Ra’s was giving him wiggle room without someone hounding his steps. A hum, the flicker of something behind the man’s eyes that put Ra’s instantly on guard, but not enough to help him predict his next movement.

“You know that any rule you make, I can counter with one of my own.”

“I do, and am ready to honor, as it’s the nature of our deal. I’m a man of my word.”

“Okay then”, the detective finally conceded, sitting up straight, book closed on his lap and hands resting easily over the cover. “I’ll accept your terms, and won’t give my future clique the slip.”

Despite this small victory, Ra’s didn’t allow himself to relax; now came the detective’s countermeasure.

Calmly as still water, the slim man stood up, walking towards Ra’s desk, opening the book on its first page and softly placing in on the wood between them. One slice of paper, carefully folded, gave the Demon’s Head pause.

“Since you insist this is for show, and thus not requiring specific skills on the ninja’s part, I’m going to choose who will be part of my clique. After all, I’ll be in perpetual close quarters with these people, it’s only fair I get to decide who it’ll be.”

Ra’s eyes never left the icy blue ones staring him down. It’d be a fatal mistake to let one’s sight wander when there was a viper in the room.

“Prudence is already tasked with managing your schedule, she can’t be considered among these you selected.”

“She isn’t”, was fired back. “These aren’t fully fledged ninja, they have just begun their training. As such, I can make sure their progress aligns with my needs, something that will make them more useful in the long run if they are to be my shadows. A sniper that can socially blend in as a perfect camaleon. A prodigy, both in mind games and the technological world. A mechanic well versed in a caregiver tasks. A naturally born fighter, showed proficiency particularly on swords and hand to hand. I think those four tick every box you might want to fill, don’t you?”

A few seconds pass, while Ra’s tries to think back on every newish recruit who had the described qualities. He couldn’t come with a single one. Too many variables.

Despite himself, he nods. His bonded lifts his hand from the desk, and picks up his book on his way to the door, not looking back while Ra's unfolds the list.

He feels himself freeze.

“Children?”

Timothy has already left the room. Ra's can't help but feel pride. As foolish as he thinks his bonded's mission to be, he has to admire his dedication to it, and Timothy had just spent the equivalent of a Genie's first wish with the purpose of freeing four young ones from the League's training and future.

-----.-----

Tim is looking down at his three 'bodyguards', knowing he made the right call but still feeling the panic creeping up on him. Like, fuck, this was clearly an evil organization, as no self respecting moral one would allow him to be responsible of four impressionable, probably traumatized children.

L, P, H and K. 9, 7, 10 and 9 respectively. All sitting down, hands on their laps, eyes down. Ready to obey any order.

Fuck, he wanted to puke.

Breathing in deeply, he crouched in front of them. Tried for a smile. Too forced. Settled for a grimace.

“My name is Tim”, he started, “and you're safe with me. I'll train you, protect you from the League as much as possible, and try my best to help you escape if I find a better place for you.”

He doesn't bother lying for appearances sake. Ra's must know Tim's reasons for choosing children (too good, would be noticed soon by their teachers, would be under Ra's thumb sooner rather than later), but it didn't matter. Even if Tim managed to get them away, it was his right. For all intents and purposes, as far as the League was concerned, he owned them. Not that he was going to tell them that: if it made him sick to think that, he can only imagine that information on the children's minds.

They don't seem to believe him, but answer honestly when asked questions about their past. L had (bravely, stupidly) sold himself into servitude to the League to help his family. P, apparently a smart cookie, was sold away by some scientific organization back home when she started asking too many question about the disappearance of her father and brother. One of H's mothers had left the League when she married, and her son was taken away as compensation in the middle of the night, when she couldn't fight back (luckily, as she'd have died and they would have still taken the kid). K was an orphan, sucked into the League too young, but saved by an older apprentice who took him under his wing: said boy was now missing, and K's obvious short fuse wouldn't stand for it long.

He wants to save these children so bad it hurts. Has to remind himself that whatever he will do about this (and he still has to think about it), he won't be able to do for a while.

----.----

He keeps some sort of schedule. Waking up in the morning, breakfast with Ra's unless previously canceled by the other man, training his new minions, break a fight between L and K, lunch, give them numerous tasks to get them off his back (keeping one close for appearances sake; they were his bodyguards after all, or would be after some training), wander along whichever base they were at the moment, tea with Ra's, picking up his brats, wander some more and some time for them to play like actual children, dinner, bed. Rinse repeat.

Some variations, however, were inevitable.

Groaning Tim rolled on his back, silken sheets under him and around his legs, to look at the four little heads waiting by his bedside, various degrees of alarm there.

“What is it?”

H's hand gripped tighter L's, who had the other arm wrapped around P. K was standing in front of them, dagger at the ready.

“The base is under attack. We await our instructions, Master.”

“Tim”, he reminded the child, before yawning. “Who is it again?”

This time, the youngest and only girl talked. “We are not sure. Said something about The Demon's Head being their archenemy and/”

“Then it's a Ra's problem, not a Us problem. Let the man handle it, he has enough manpower as it is, and even if he doesn’t, he's due for a swim anytime now”, dropping his head and closing his eyes once again, he vaguely waved a hand in their general direction. “You guys go back to bed, just be careful and lock the door in case some of Ra's worst people let someone wander.”

“We can't possibly leave you! What if you're attacked? We'd be too far away to protect you!” K’s tiny hand tightened around his knife. “We'd fail our mission!”

Reigning in a groan, he gave it a thought. They had a point, in that were anything to happen, he risked not being close enough to keep the children safe.

Sighing, he waved a hand again.

“Okay, you guys can stay, but we are not getting up. It's like five am, I went to sleep less than an hour ago.”

P jumped in place and frowned at him. “We escorted you here right after dinner.”

“That you did. Anyway, cuddle piles anyone?”

L jumped right in, as he expected, worming his way under the sheets until he could cuddle to Tim's left side, dragging H behind him. P seemed to think about it, but if the dark circles under her eyes (and his informants) were to be trusted, she'd probably slept as much as him, most assuredly looking into her family's disappearance. She finally fell on his other side, instantly groaning.

K looked at all of them in disappointment, and stubbornly sat down behind P, his back to them and facing the door. Tim wondered what it would take to get the kid to chill.

Shrugging (you can't win them all), he went back to sleep.

By the time he really woke up, it was to an amused Pru holding hauntingly a camera and smirking down at him. All four kids were now cuddled around him.

“Shut up, Pru. Like you can talk. I saw you giving L that practice gun the other day, don't think I didn't.”

#twisted soulmate #soulmate au #nemesis au #Tim drake #Ra's al Ghul #Pru #four small minions Tim's gonna steal from Ra's #those are a reference to another fandom I love #brownie points to whoever notices the reference #spy vs spy kinda thing #Tim drake is an unwilling sugar baby #Ra's is all too happy to play sugar daddy for this kid #Ra's is creepy #my writting #my writing #Red robin

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diavolodigitale · 3 years

Text

Stare

So... there’s this. I wrote most of the text like half a year ago and I was reeeeeally happy about it, but then I finished reading the novel and just kind of dropped it. Anyway, I came across this story among some other trash in my folders some time ago and decided that I was strongly determined to finish it as it would be a shame if I wasted so much work.

Me: the beginning was so good, I am upset about the way I finished it :C well, nobody’s going to read it anyway, so who cares.

AO3: psst, you wanna 1000+ hits on this?

Lately, Lan Xichen had been feeling uneasy all the time. No matter where he went, he would feel apprehensive and tense, as if something threatened him, pricked him in the back. Perhaps, it was high time for him to finally turn around and face what had been lurking in shadows this whole time.

Genres: Romance, Fluff, Comfort, Eventual Romance

Pairing: Lan Xichen/Jiang Cheng

Characters: Lan Xichen, Jiang Cheng, Wei Wuxian, Lan Wangji, Jin Ling, Lan Sizhui, Lan Jingyi

Rating: G for God why is it so long

Size: whopping 16000 words (all 5 chapters are in this post)

Chapter 1: Aggressive

Standing in the doorway of the Cloud Recess reception hall, Lan Xichen slightly turned his head to face the inside of the spacious room. The feeling of uneasiness he had been experiencing for the last couple of minutes reached its peak, which made him resolute to find out what exactly seemed so wrong to him. It was the time of what one might call a sporadic celebration held by the Gusu Lan sect together with the Yunmeng Jiang sect every once in a while with the purpose of strengthening the bonds between the two sects. The guests had already gathered and now were merrily chatting around him, yet from the very beginning of the ceremony he had been feeling as though something was odd, and this feeling did not let him be at ease.

His gaze slid swiftly from one corner of the room, passing the members of both clans resting at their tables, each on their respective side, and stopped abruptly at the face of Jiang Cheng, who was sitting stiffly, holding a cup with liquor in his hand, and fixedly staring at him with an unusually grim expression on his face. The moment Lan Xichen caught him doing that, he tried to avert his eyes as if he hadn’t been looking that way at all, and gulped everything that was in his cup at one go.

Not unlike Jin Guangyao, Lan Xichen was very much concerned with the well-being and comfort of his guests, so he immediately thought that something must have happened that angered the leader of the Jiang sect, who was, in addition to everything, quite infamous for his short temper. With Jiang Cheng diligently hiding his gaze, the atmosphere, to which Lan Xichen was quite susceptible, lightened quite considerably, so he concluded that his feeling must have appeared because of Jiang Cheng’s dissatisfaction with the Gusu Lan sect’s ceremony.

His smile as kind and genuine as ever, Lan Xichen elegantly but promptly approached the table at which Jiang Cheng was sitting.

“Sect Leader Jiang,” he greeted and bowed politely, joining his hands in front of himself.

“Sect Leader Lan,” murmured the greeting Jiang Cheng, standing up from his mat and also bowing in respect.

Despite the fact that Lan Xichen would frequently personally greet all of his guests, he had been unprecedentedly busy before this particular celebration and hadn’t had the opportunity to welcome the disciples and members of the Yunmeng Jiang sect when they had just arrived. He was wondering if that might have become the cause for Jaing Cheng’s displeasure.

“Are you enjoying the ceremony, Sect Leader Jiang?” he asked, his eyes slightly squinted because of the smile blooming on his face. He was sure the ceremony would satisfy the needs of all of his guests as Lan Wangji had personally attended to all of the matters that concerned its organization. In spite of that, he still wanted to make sure nothing out of the ordinary had happened that might have spoiled the mood of his guests.

“Yes, I am,” nodded Jiang Cheng, taking a seat on his mat again. He abruptly turned his eyes to Jin Ling, who, he had noticed earlier, was frantically spinning and turning at his own table beside him. Sending him a condemnatory look, he turned back to Lan Xichen and added, “Do not bother, Sect Leader Lan. You could not have held a better ceremony.”

Lan Xichen bowed lightly in gratitude. Jiang Cheng was a difficult person to deal with, so he, of course, would not have let it out even if something had really displeased him, especially to the sect leader’s face, so Lan Xichen decided to stick around for a little longer and entertain the Yunmeng Jiang sect leader with his presence, just to be on the safe side.

“I sincerely hope you do not mind me joining you,” he said politely, kneeling beside Jiang Cheng’s table.

Jiang Cheng’s eyes widened a bit from surprise as it was not common for a sect leader to sit beside their guests instead of taking their seat at the head of the main table.

“No… not at all,” he replied, trying to make his voice seem emotionless and rigid.

Jin Ling stared at them with overt interest, having abandoned the food he indulged into only moments ago. Jiang Cheng sent him another killing stare, reminding him to watch his manners, and the young man was forced to mind his own business yet again. He was extremely bored to sit there all alone with nobody to chat with, but even more than that he was afraid of a future scolding, so in the end decided not to test his uncle’s patience.

“How do you find the liquor from Gusu, Sect Leader Jiang?” asked Lan Xichen, carefully filling his cup from the liquor bottle standing on his table.

Jiang Cheng accepted the cup and looked into the clear liquid inside of it, reflecting on the question. Not a single muscle on his face twitched as he gulped it and set the cup on the table with a quiet tap.

“It is to my liking,” he said briefly and threw a quick glance at the bottle in Lan Xichen’s hands.

The man in front of him smiled vividly and busied himself with filling his cup yet again.

Some visitors of the Cloud Recess felt quite uncomfortable when served the liquor there as the Lan sect members wouldn’t join them in drinking it, and Jiang Cheng was definitely one of them. Yet he could not admit it as it seemed impolite for him to refuse a drink offered by the sect leader himself.

“Young Master Wei mentioned quite a few times that he preferred it to the liquor from Yunmeng,” said Lan Xichen, offering the filled cup to Jiang Cheng once again.

“I am sure he did,” murmured Jiang Cheng and pouted for reasons unknown to his interlocutor. He took the cup from Lan Xichen but did not down it and instead continued to hold it in his hands, as if warming it.

To avoid the uncomfortable silence that arose after mentioning Wei Wuxian in the conversation, Lan Xichen sighed with pretended disappointment and said, “I myself was never able to try it, so all I can do is believe Young Master Wei’s as well as Sect Leader Jiang’s words. Could you, perhaps, describe the taste to me, Sect Leader Jiang?” The smile not fading from his face for even a second, Lan Xichen tilted his head a bit and added, “If it would not be too much of a bother for you, of course.”

“It is...” started Jiang Cheng, still looking into his cup instead of lifting his head to face Lan Xichen, and squeezed his lips.

Jin Ling was gawking at them again, leaning a bit on the wooden surface before him, his puppy eyes gleaming at the sight of something even slightly more interesting that the plates on his table he was rearranging this whole time. Jiang Cheng only sighed at the annoying youngling’s behaviour and continued after a short pause.

“It is sweet with a bit of spice in it. It does not sting like some other wines I have been lucky enough to sample and because of that it is quite easy to be tricked by its mildness and drink more than one should.”

After blurting out the last part of the sentence, Jiang Cheng hurried to drink the wine in his cup, this time savouring the taste.

Watching him drink, Lan Xichen nodded a few times as if understanding what Jiang Cheng meant.

“Has Sect Leader Lan ever felt like tasting the wine himself?” asked Jiang Chen, not giving him back the cup for refilling. Immediately, though, he seized the question, not letting Lan Xichen even consider his answer. “My apologies if I am being disrespectful, asking such a thing. Please, disregard my question.”

La Xichen shook his head, smiling.

“I was curious. There is no shame for anybody in wanting to try the unknown. I am only inquiring about it because, if I am being completely honest, I still am curious,” he squinted his eyes in a guilty smile, his hands lying flat on his knees, not able to get a hold of the cup to fill for his guest. “It is the fragrance, you see,” he continued. “I can feel a very strong fruit aroma enveloping the room every time we hold a ceremony in the Cloud Recess, and it piques my curiosity.”

“It must be tough for the Lan sect disciples if even Sect Leader Lan feels this way,” exclaimed Jin Ling surprisedly. Jiang Cheng immediately turned to him with his whole body, the sight of his clenched fist silencing all further remarks of his nephew.

Lan Xichen laughed softly, taking the cup from Jiang Cheng’s tight grip and startling him with an airy touch on his fingers. He seemed to hear the fragile porcelain almost crack in Jiang Cheng’s hand and decided to save his guest from likely injuring himself, even if it came at the cost of him looking a bit insolent.

“Indeed, it is tough, but they have many other things to enjoy here,” he said, filling the cup yet again. “Sect Leader Jiang, do not be angry at Young Master Jin. Let children be children, as inquisitive and restless as they can be. At least during such festivities.”

Jin Ling’s eyes lit up when Lan Xichen himself stood up for him. He glanced at his uncle, awaiting his reaction, and felt satisfied, seeing how Jiang Cheng ended up following the advice of his senior and only sighed again defeatedly, accepting the cup.

“Children are not easily entertained during such events. Perhaps, Young Master Jin would like to leave the reception hall and join the Gusu Lan sect disciples who right now happen to practice archery in the training yard? Of course, with the permission of his sect leader,” said Lan Xichen, glancing kindly first at Jin Ling, and then at his uncle.

Hearing the proposal, Jin Ling grew even more agitated and pressed his hands hard on his knees, silently praying for Jiang Cheng to let him go.

As soon as Jiang Cheng gave him a short nod, he sprinted out of the hall, thanking both him and Zewu-Jun as he ran towards the exit.

“Running is prohibited in the Cloud Recess!” rang the voice of Lan Qiren from somewhere on the other side of the room, but Jin Ling was already too far to care or even notice.

Lan Xichen gracefully covered his mouth with his long white sleeve, letting out a short laugh. Jiang Cheng clicked his tongue, his brows furrowing as he looked in the direction Jin Ling ran in.

“I will bring the brat back and make him apologize for his behaviour,” he said through gritted teeth.

Fearing he would really stand up and follow his nephew, Lan Xichen rushed to stop him.

“No need to worry, Sect Leader Jiang, Young Master Jin will be able to make amends for it later. I am sure it is not the last time you are in the Cloud Recess after all.”

Having been positively influenced by Zewu-Jun’s wish to keep the ceremony as peaceful and tranquil as possible, Jiang Cheng seemed to quickly calm down, and for once stopped thinking about how his nephew always allegedly brought him trouble and shame in the eyes of the surrounding people.

Lan Xichen noticed that Jiang Cheng still did not drink the wine he poured him previously, so he tried to redirect his attention to that instead.

“Ah, now that I think of it, Sect Leader Jiang has just mentioned that it is quite easy to drink more wine than one should, and I am now hurrying him to drink even more without offering a single bite of food. How improper of me,” he said and bowed slightly, feeling a bit foolish.

“Please, do not apologize, Zewu-Jun, I am treated well, and I have everything I need here,” awkwardly replied Jiang Cheng and took a grape from one of the small plates standing on the table in front of him as if to assure the host he was really fine. “What is more important,” he muttered, “I feel like I am stealing the attention of Zewu-Jun from the other guests. Please, do not feel obliged to entertain me exclusively, I do not require others to keep me company at all times, Zewu-Jun.”

His words sounded a bit harsher than he wanted them to, yet there was no going back, so he just sat and looked at Lan Xichen. The expression of the latter one, however, did not change the slightest, he only shook his head again with the same mild smile.

“Sect Leader Jiang is our most important guest, so there is no other person here today more entitled to get my attention. Moreover, I do not feel forced, so Sect Leader Jiang has nothing to worry about. Only if my presence burdens him, will I take my leave,” he said, screwing his eyes. One might say the words would sound somewhat shamelessly if it was not for the person who uttered them.

Having felt the air in the room become significantly livelier and lighter after he came to keep Jiang Cheng company, Lan Xichen decided it would be best to stay and personally make sure his guest did not need anything and felt comfortable and satisfied, thus, the condition he put forward.

“No-no! It is not that… I did not…” blurted Jiang Cheng, gravely afraid to offend or anger his most powerful ally who also just happened to be the calmest person ever known to the cultivation world. He managed to quickly compose himself and went on, “I would not want Zewu-Jun to have sore knees because of me.”

He looked at how Lan Xichen had been sitting on the bare floor this whole time and clenched his teeth and the jawbone below his temples jutted.

“Then I will take a cushion not to trouble the sect leader and join him shortly,” answered Lan Xichen, not leaving Jiang Cheng any other choice than to comply.

Lan Qiren shook his head, disapproving of the sight.

Wei Wuxian conspiratorially leaned to Lan Wangji sitting beside him and whispered to him, covering his mouth with his hand.

“What are they even doing there? Lan Zhan, why is Zewu-Jun not sitting at his table today?”

Lan Wangji did not answer and only continued to look at how his brother was arranging a seat for himself near Jiang Cheng.

Wei Wuxian hmphed and mumbled to himself.

“Well, if Hanguang-Jun doesn’t know, then there is nobody in this room I can possibly ask apart from Zewu-Jun himself”.

Watching intently as Jiang Cheng was constantly huffing and puffing, his face shifting from grim and pale to anxious and bluish, while Lan Xichen was smiling, and smiling, and smiling his warm and amiable smile, filling his cup again and again, Wei Wuxian couldn’t help but chuckle at how helpless his shidi looked.

“Wei Ying, stop staring,” whispered Lan Wangji, his glance pricking Wei Wuxian as he reproached him for his inappropriate behaviour.

“Lan Zha-a-ang,” uttered Wei Ying slowly, giving Lan Wangji a few reassuring pats on the back, “don’t be such a bore. Even if you don’t want to look, I do, because this is truly a sight I do not indent to miss even a second of.”

Chapter 2: Threatening

Another eerily similar episode happened to Lan Xichen in a few weeks’ time, during the nighthunt under the supervision of the Yunmeng Jiang sect. Both of the sects participated in it by mutual agreement.

The hour was late and the night air was fresh. No animals or any other wildlife could be seen active in the proximity of the cultivators’ makeshift

camp situated on the clearing in the woods. Long arms of trees reached out far and intertwined, creating the illusion of closed space around the clearing, but the area in the middle of it was brightly illuminated by the moon light on a par with many lanterns brought by the cultivators. The atmosphere was calm enough, despite the fact that many people were agitated and anxiously looking forward to the grandiose fight, some of them making practice swings with their swords while the others fought their urges to start a bonfire and nestle cozily beside it, falling asleep, surrounded by dark wilderness.

“Brother, the beast has fled from Young Master Jin’s trap,” uttered emotionlessly Lan Wangji, having approached his brother. Zewu-Jun was graciously standing near a tall branchy tree at the side of the clearing and watching the cultivators roam around and try to find the track of the beast they came to hunt down.

“As expected,” he said knowingly, “having been wounded by it, it is now enraged and will soon come to seek its revenge.”

Lan Wangji nodded agreeingly. They knew it was not the best idea, to put a trap for such a huge beast, as it was clearly not able to hold it back, much less kill it. Nonetheless, they chose not to raise their concerns as this time they were only the guests of the Yunmeng Jiang sect. Jin Ling’s methods differed from those used by their disciples, but he seemed to have quite a lot of fun, nighthunting using all of the means provided to him by his uncle, and there was enough of adult cultivators around to take care of the situation in case something went wrong.

Hearing Jin Ling, Lan Sizhui, and Lan Jingyi happily chattering over the enormous footprints the beast had left along a narrow path in the woods, Lan Xichen smiled. His goal had always been to discipline his disciples so that he could later let them wander around the world without having to worry for their safety. It was achieved by teaching them to control themselves, be careful and aware of their surroundings, and putting as much knowledge into their heads as it was humanly possible. Nevertheless, at such moments he wanted to give them as much freedom as he could, understanding how thousands and thousands of rules of the Gusu Lan sect could impinge on the young minds such as theirs.

He looked at Lan Wangji standing proudly beside him, his face so similar to his own, yet so different at the same time.

“Wangji, where will you go after the nighthunt is over?” he asked inquisitively.

“Don’t know. Let us catch the beast first, then think,” he answered with no emotions colouring his voice.

“I will be glad to see you in Could Recess, but if you have other plans…” Lan Xichen hesitated before smiling with the corners of his lips as he looked at Wei Wuxian, who pretended to teach something extremely valuable to the juniors standing with their mouths gaping, and continuing, “I do not mind either.”

Lan Wangji bowed to him in gratitude, knowing that it was not easy for his brother to let him go and take all of the responsibilities of leading the sect onto his shoulders. Anyway, he did not intend to leave before the beast was dealt with, and Wei Wuxian’s extreme desire to glance at how big and wild it was was only one of many reasons for that.

It was rumoured that the beast was a giant scorpion with a head of a snake coming out of its tail instead of a sting. As tall as four horses stacked atop of each other, it supposedly could kill a negligent passer-by in more than a hundred different ways: crush them by its weight, swallow them completely, strangle them with its wriggling snake body; and those were only the methods mentioned briefly in the tavern of the nearby city by its owner, who was so eager to discuss the beast, the cultivators did not even have to pay him for his tongue to loosen.

Nobody knew where such a beast could come from or where it could possibly be hiding at, as nobody ever lived long enough to see it leave. In any case, tales told by common folk were rarely to be trusted in such circumstances, as quite frequently the beasts that were frolicking around the forests and killing hundreds of men turned out to be mere animals that grew a bit too large in size and scared one or two villagers on their way home. What one misheard, the other one overexaggerated, and so the stories of hellish demon spawns were born to reach the ears of the members of the cultivation sect that was the closest to the infested area.

Experienced cultivators knew not to hope too much to encounter what they were promised, but the juniors still held a youthful lust for adventures, the tales of which they would be able to share with each other afterwards as a part of their competition for the title of the bravest and most talented swordsman. They wandered around the area of the forest not too far away from their seniors and tried to determine what was the beast’s movement pattern, veering, as Wei Wuxian was lazily sitting on the tree branch and pointing with his flute to the spots they should inspect, his leg swinging casually.

Should the beast really be as incredible and mighty as it was described by the villagers, the amount of negative air enveloping the members of the two sects would be overwhelming at best. Despite that, the only thread of threatening energy Lan Xichen felt was the one directed solely at him. It was far too weak to affect him in any way, but its pricking still made him

feel uncomfortable and a bit twitchy, even though he did not display it. The energy was not scattered all over the place and instead bothered only him, which made him think it must not be the beast who was emitting it.

As he was pondering over where this energy could possibly be coming from, he noticed his brother standing quietly, directing all of his attention at a particular spot on the other edge of the circular clearing the cultivators were occupying. He followed his gaze, but could not see what he was staring at.

“What is the matter, Wangji?” he asked.

“I thought I saw someone,” replied Lan Wangji with notes of concern in his voice, only discernible by Lan Xichen.

“Behind that tree?” asked Lan Xichen, seemingly not worrying even a tad.

Lan Wangji nodded, clenching the hilt of Bichen.

Lan Xichen put a hand on his shoulder and shook his head lightly before rising noiselessly up into the air with the intention of flying over to the other side and not scaring away a person that stood there, hiding. His snowy robes and ink-black long hair fluttered in the wind when he suddenly stopped and descended back down, hearing a familiar voice ringing out further in the woods.

“Uncle Jiang! What are you standing here for? I almost didn’t notice you!” yelled Jin Ling, slamming into the tree Lan Xichen previously wanted to approach to stop himself from passing by Jiang Cheng.

Without saying anything, Jiang Cheng came out from behind the tree, his fists clenched, eyes bulging, and lips pouting. He couldn’t make up his mind as to how we could scold his nephew for what he had done, so instead only stared at him, hoping that the stare would be as effective as the words he was now at a loss for.

Jin Ling did not understand why in the world his uncle was angry already since he did not yet do anything to cause this. He did his best to ignore this sudden fit of rage and continued as if nothing happened.

“I was looking for you everywhere! Uncle Jiang, Uncle Wei showed me how we can track the beast’s way starting at my trap. Will you go in search of it with us?” he beamed, not being able to stand still from the excitement that filled him.

“Uncle Wei?” mocked Jiang Cheng, the corner of his lip twitching. “If he is your uncle now, what do you even come to me for? Next time we are in Lotus Pear, why don’t you collect all of your belongings and join him on his journeys instead of staying?” he raged.

Jin Ling’s eyes reddened a bit and lips started to tremble. The situation seemed so unfair to him. Having lost one of the few relatives he had and suddenly having found another one only to be chided for it by the closest person he had, he felt like running away immediately and never speaking to Jiang Cheng again. He was used to his uncle yelling at him left and right, but the topic of family had always been his weak spot, and he knew that Jiang Cheng was well aware of that.

“Maybe I will!” he shouted with a wobbling voice. “If you don’t want to see me in Lotus Pier, you can just say so, you don’t have to look for excuses like uncle Wei!”

Everybody directed their attention to the two yelling at each other. The disciples of the Yunmeng Jiang sect were, of course, long accustomed to such squabbles between their leader and his nephew, but this one in particular seemed to be a tad worse than most of the previous ones.

Fairy ran towards its owner, barking loudly, as it sensed how upset he was. It sat close to Jin Ling’s feet, flattened its ears against its head, and pushed its black snout into his hand in between his trembling fingers.

Jin Ling, being almost on the verge of crying, carefully petted it with his hand and fearlessly looked Jiang Cheng in the eyes.

Looking at them sticking so close to each other in search of support, both confused and distressed, Jiang Cheng felt extremely guilty. He knew that he shouldn’t have said what he had, but it was also incredibly hard for him to admit his mistake, especially in front of so many people that included his own subordinates as well as the prominent cultivators from the Lan sect. He was breathing heavily as the feelings of remorse and spite fought inside of him. As always, spite won.

“Jin Ling! You-”

“Sect Leader Jiang,” interrupted Lan Xichen, appearing out of nowhere beside him. Everybody was so focused on the argument that didn’t even notice when he managed to approach the two. The expression on his face was gentle, yet he was not smiling, feeling it would be completely out of place at the time.

“Sect Leader Jiang,” he repeated to get Jiang Cheng’s attention, “please, let us consider this incident a misunderstanding. Both you and Young Master Jin need some time to cool off, so why don’t you speak again after we finish the nighthunt together?”

Lan Xichen wanted to lay his hand on Jiang Cheng’s shoulder, but it seemed to him that he would get a scorch from how furious he was, so he dared not. He gave Jin Ling a sympathetic look and nodded encouragingly,

taking his chances to persuade at least one of the sides to settle for a temporary peace.

Jin Ling sniffed, trying his best not to let a single tear slip out of his eyes, crossed his hands on the chest and turned away, showing his unwillingness to continue the talk.

“Fine,” roared Jiang Cheng and determinately fled deeper into the forest, not to be bothered by anybody else. Lan Xichen, however, did not agree with his decision, so he followed him, waving his hand for others to stay away. Meanwhile, Wei Wuxian gingerly approached Jin Ling, pushing Lan Wangji to the front as he went to get an obstacle between him and the huge spiritual dog panting at Jin Ling’s feet. He was not yet ready to overcome his fear, but seeing his shijie’s son at such a state was more than he could handle.

“Sect Leader Jiang!” called Lan Xichen, almost catching up with Jiang Cheng. “Please, wait.”

Jiang Cheng stopped abruptly and sighed, still clenching his fists.

“I know that my behaviour was ill-advised, Sect Leader Lan. I apologize that you had to witness it, but I cannot make up for it right now. Maybe, it would be best if you joined your sect members and defeated the beast for the nighthunt and everything about it to finally be over.”

“Sect Leader Jiang’s disciples are all extremely skilled and talented, I am sure that my help is not needed at the moment,” said Lan Xichen consolingly and couldn’t help but let an awkward smile slide onto his face.

Jiang Cheng turned around and faced the only person that had the audacity to follow him. Other cultivators having stayed behind, there was nobody to hold a lantern and illuminate the place, so his face was completely submerged into darkness. Despite that, Lan Xichen still managed to discern what a guilty and upset expression he was wearing. One single ray of moonlight managed to slip through thick branches above, and for a second it seemed like Jiang Cheng’s eyes were shimmering.

“Sect Leader Jiang,” started Lan Xichen again, seeing how Jiang Cheng could not find any suitable words, “lately, I have noticed that something is bothering you. Has anything happened?” Similarly to Wangji’s, his robes possessed a peculiar feature of giving the effect of shining in the darkness, even without a proper light source nearby. His hair descended in soft waves onto his lapels and blew in the late-night breeze. Holding his hands behind his back, he was the epitome of tranquility.

Jiang Cheng had always envied such people and how they never lost control over anything.

“No,” he uttered, raising his head to feel the wind roaming up in the tree branches and rustling the leaves above them.

Lan Xichen was drawn away from gazing onto his tired face by the sudden gust of hateful energy brought about by the wind. It was indeed strong, stronger than what he had expected to find in the forest that night. Immediately he became more alert and reached for the xiao hanging on his waist.

“Seems like we are not alone anymore,” smirked Jiang Cheng, stroking the ring on his index finger.

For a moment, complete silence fell onto the forest. Then the beast emerged.

Should the other cultivators be with them at the moment, Wei Wuxian and all of the younger disciples would be glad to learn that at least the tales of it having a hideous snake head instead of a sting were true. Its eyes were dangerously gleaming in the darkness as it menacingly approached the two sect leaders. Its size was truly terrifying, even though it was quite difficult to determine if it was really as tall as rumoured. The cloud of resentful energy it produced was so overpowering that both men were taken aghast. It was impossible to understand how such a large beast with this much dark power managed to sneak up on them.

Not taking even a second of delay, Lan Xichen grabbed Liebing. The sound, cold and clear, enveloped everything around them, and the beast immediately staggered on its way to attacking him. Lan Xichen took a few careful steps back, still playing his xiao. The beast roared and squelched because of the melody piercing it right to its essence, but still followed him. It would not be a difficult fight for the leader of the Lan sect, seeing how he was able to take control of the creature at the very start of it, but it wasn’t meant for him to finish off the monster that night.

With a low growl, Jiang Cheng made an abrupt movement of his hand, and a neon-purple whip traced its pattern, hitting the ground beneath his feet and making a dent in the soft undergrowth. The beast turned its ugly head to the startling sound and took a giant step towards Lan Xichen, wanting to escape the newly emerged threat. With no hesitation at all, it sent his tail with a snake’s mouth wide-open towards Jiang Cheng in an attempt to drive him back.

Engulfed in the ghostly sound of the flute, Jiang Cheng glanced in the direction the beast was advancing to, and his body moved without him even having to make a conscious effort. He dodged the bite of the giant snake, almost completely dropping to the ground, and instantly rose up to press on the creature. He hit the ground with Zidian a few times on both

sides of the monster, scaring it and not letting it use any other route to escape.

Disturbed by the flute’s lethargic melody and blinded by Zidian’s glare, the beast cried again in despair before Jiang Cheng raised his whip one last time, swaying it high in the air for the hit to gain force, and landed it with a crack dead on the center of the beast, cutting both of its heads together with its body into two perfectly even parts. Lan Xichen hurriedly jumped away, hearing how the tree behind him snaped in half, also stricken by the whip.

Still holding Liebing in his hand, and for some reason holding his breath, he glanced at Jiang Cheng. His heart was pounding loudly as he continued looking, enchanted by the sight.

Zidian glared with vivid purple light and crackled, sparks flying all around its owner. Even the fresh nigh air seemed to feel crisp as small flashes of lightening pierced it here and there, making it impossible to even approach Jiang Cheng. With his face austere, chin slightly protruding upwards, and eyes full of resentment and haughtiness towards the fallen opponent, he stood there, amid the dark chilly woods, illuminated by the ghastly glow of his spiritual weapon. His combed hair seemed to be the colour of a ripe dark plum while his face resembled a light and tender thistle, in addition to its paleness remaining unmoved and, thus, making him look more like a ghost than human. Without moving his head, he slowly turned his eyes to Lan Xichen who was breaking a certain rule of his own sect, still staring at him, and pierced him with his scornful glance in return.

After what seemed to Lan Xichen as eternity, but, in reality, turned out to be a mere few seconds, they were approached by a noisy crowd of cultivators, rushing from the camp to the sounds of a battle. Hurrying at the head of the group was Lan Wangji who understood something was wrong hearing the first notes of his brother’s xiao ringing in the distance.

“Brother, have you been hurt?” he asked, examining the destructive aftermath of the whip’s work around them.

“I am completely unharmed, thanks to Sect Leader Jiang,” answered Lan Xichen slowly, taking his time to regain his composure. He added, still looking at Jiang Cheng, “Sect Leader Jiang, I am much obliged for your help.”

Holding Liebing, he locked his hands in front of himself and took a deep bow to Jiang Cheng, staying in this position for a few more seconds than needed.

“Wah, how scary,” whispered Lan Jingyi either to himself or to Lan Sizhui, who, as always, was standing not too far from him. They were afraid to even look at Jiang Cheng at the moment.

Jin Ling only pouted more, throwing furtive looks at the body of the beast he wanted to catch so badly and at his uncle who was at the centre of everybody’s attention. He was proud more than disappointed, but did not want to admit it even to himself.

Fairy happily wagged its tail a few steps behind him.

Jiang Cheng’s whip vanished, and he bowed to Lan Xichen in return.

“Zewu-Jun has nothing to thank me for. The nighthunt was a joint venture, and both of the sides have put in an equal amount of work,” he concluded, straightening himself up.

“Then it is my delight to pronounce this nighthunt successful,” said Lan Xichen for everybody to hear. “Now the Lan sect will take its leave and-”

“We shall all return to Lotus Pier and rest. Let us leave long travels as well as cleaning up the mess for tomorrow, Sect Leader Lan,” said Jiang Cheng in a tone that did not condone any dispute.

“Then we will avail ourselves of your hospitality once again,” yielded Lan Xichen and smiled politely, lowering his gaze.

Wei Wuxian sighed.

“He could have at least been more respectful and not interrupted Zewu-Jun,” he said for only the juniors around him to hear. They happened to be shielding him from Jin Ling’s Fairy who was peacefully minding its own business.

“Mn,” agreed Lan Wangji, and the others actively nodded, as always devotedly supporting the opinion of their seniors.

Everybody having departed in the direction of Lotus Pier, Jin Ling was the last one to leave the scene. First, because he had to drag away Fairy that already started nibbling on one of the beast’s many legs, and, second, because he did not want to walk in depressing silence all the way home. After all, his place was always beside his uncle. He decided to keep his distance and lagged behind on purpose, but no matter how hard he tried, there was still another person that just would not leave.

Wei Wuxian leaned against a tree a few meters away from him and toyed with Chenqing in his hand.

“Are you still angry at him, Rulan?” he asked quietly.

Jin Ling hmphed, hearing his courtesy name being used.

“Don’t be. You know how stupid your uncle is sometimes, and he’s generally not very good with words. Don’t learn from the worst, learn from the best,” he grinned and pushed himself up from the tree. “And call me your martial uncle, that way he will not find fault with you. Now, send your dog away, and let’s go.”

Jin Ling stood, not granting Wei Wuxian his request, and waited.

“A-Ling, don’t be like that!” shouted his martial uncle and stamped his foot onto the damp grass.

Jin Ling smiled mischievously and slapped Fairy’s butt a few times.

“Go, find uncle Jiang. Follow him all the time until he gives you food,” he murmured to it, and the dog sprinted off, obeying its master’s command.

The dog having increased the distance between them significantly, Wei Wuxian came to Jin Ling and pulled him with one arm around his neck right into his bear hug.

“Now that is my shizhi! I will treat you with my favourite pie when we return.”

“For this,” grumbled Jin Ling, struggling in his grip, “you will have to make it at least two, Wei shishu.”

Chapter 3: Unreadable

Down in Lotus Pier all of the guests were let back into the rooms they were residing in the day before the nighthunt and fed richly to commemorate the hunt’s successful outcome. Even though most of the cultivators clearly understood that their contribution to the nighthunt was close to nonexistent, nobody refused the late-night dinner or, as some called it, the early-morning breakfast.

Along with spicy, but, nevertheless, quite delicious food, they were treated with the news that what the leader of the Jiang sect meant by “tomorrow” was, actually, the day after tomorrow. The nighthunt ended almost at dawn, and by the time they arrived at Lotus Pier, the sun had already risen. It was only natural for them to assume that they would take a short rest before setting off for their journey home, but Wei Wuxian was kind enough to explain to them that it was not how they did it here, in Yunmeng. Sect leader’s guests came a long way to participate in the nighthunt and helped the local dwellers by making the roads safe again, so the least he could do was express his gratitude in such a way. It goes without saying that nobody dared to disagree.

Despite his body being tired and mind telling him he was long late according to his sleep schedule, Lan Xichen felt like neither eating nor resting. He looked out of the window of the vast guest residence he was granted. It was already light outside and birds chirped loudly in the crowns of the trees growing in the inner yard. He hanged Shuoyue on his waist and ventured outside to enjoy the beauties of the region he bitterly regretted visiting so rarely.

He strolled down a wooden bridge that stretched over a small pond with countless lotus flowers blooming on its surface, remains of morning dew covering their light-pink petals, and marveled at how different everything here was from misty and brisk Cloud Recess where he and his brother grew up. There it had always been eternally peaceful and predictable, calm and lofty, as not even animals dared to disturb the ever-present air of tranquility. Here he never knew what expected him behind the next corner. The nature of the region and the city of Yunmeng looked almost exotic and breathtaking in their untamedness. It seemed to him that this really was the only place that could bring up such people as Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng. They went through their lives like wild mountain streams, not contemplating, not doubting, acting on their impulses and doing the way they saw fit. Even when looking back or faced with regret, it was not for the foreign eyes, but only for themselves. Never did they let out any word about what they really cared for or were bitter about, instead holding it deep inside of them, carrying it in their proud hearts.

Lan Xichen smiled with the corners of his lips, unwillingly comparing himself and Lan Wangji to the people who called this place home. They were the extremities, two different sides of one coin, but, perhaps, such people really got on best.

“When I see such a smile on Zewu-Jun’s face, I can rest assured that he is pleased with the time spent in Lotus Pier,” said Wei Wuxian confidently and grinned. He was squatting down on the broad steps leading to the clear surface of the pond. Jin Ling was submerging his feet into the lukewarm water beside him.

Lan Xichen approached the skillfully carved railing of the bridge, his hands as always locked behind his back, and smiled again at Wei Wuxian.

“I enjoy it here a lot. Perhaps, even too much. This feeling always makes leaving incredibly difficult,” he replied with a meditative look on his face.

“Then why not stay here for longer? Uncle Jiang will always find a room and some time to spare for Zewu-Jun,” said Jin Ling and quietly yawned, exhausted by the nighthunt’s occurrences and lack of sleep.

“Maybe, someday,” answered Lan Xichen kindly. After a moment of silence, he inquired, “Is Young Master Ling feeling better now?”

Jin Ling nodded and splashed the water in the pond with his dangling foot.

“I know it might look strange for Zewu-Jun, but my uncle…” he inhaled more air, struggling to utter what he had in mind, before continuing, “he is not that bad. At least, not always. I don’t know what got onto him, but it will not apply to the Lan sect in any way.”

Wei Wuxian beamed proudly and dragged Jin Ling closer, squeezing his forearm.

“A-Ling is right. Sect Leader Lan should not worry about Jiang Cheng’s temper influencing his stay at all. He will come around sooner or later. He always does. And if he doesn’t,” he squinted his eyes threateningly, “I am here to help him come to his senses. After all, that’s what family is for.”

Lan Xichen looked down, his face full of understanding and contentment.

“And Wangji is…?” he asked, not really intending to finish the question.

“Sleeping, of course,” waved his hand Wei Wuxian. “He still has half an hour or so left before this creepy habit of his will tell him to rise and shine.”

Having made sure his brother was fine, Lan Xichen had only one more thing that bothered him at the moment, so he directed his thoughtful gaze at Wei Wuxian.

“Young Master Wei, I wanted to ask you…” he started, but lost his confidence mid-sentence. Instead of continuing he looked at Jin Ling, who, having been listening to them only moments ago, was already peacefully snoring on Wei Wuxian’s shoulder, clenching the hilt of Suihua in one hand, and an unfinished pie in the other one.

“Yes, Zewu-Jun? Is there something I can do for you?” urged him Wei Wuxian with enthusiasm.

Lan Xichen shook his head slowly, reserving the question. Maybe for later, maybe for himself.

“If Sect Leader Jiang is awake at the moment, I will pay him a visit. He may be too busy for us to speak during the day,” he said instead.

“He is resting in the pavilion on the other side of the residence, contemplating about his behaviour. At least I hope so. Does Zewu-Jun want me to show him the way?” asked Wei Wuxian. He did not move a single muscle of his body and sat in quite an uncomfortable position with a hunched back, afraid to wake up Jin Ling.

“There is no need. Please, take care of Young Master Jin and have some rest as well, Young Master Wei,” said Lan Xichen and bowed respectfully before departing.

Wei Wuxian watched him leave, awkwardly covering his eyes from the bright morning sun. Jin Ling produced a quiet growl of displeasure, so he hurried to move the hand back where it belonged. He knew it was too early for the question to be voiced. The time would come later.

On his way to the pavilion, Lan Xichen barely encountered any other people. The cultivators of the Yunmeng Jiang sect rarely woke up so early, so it was uncommon for somebody to practice at such an hour. He stumbled across one of his own disciples, who could neither fall asleep nor fully wake up and instead only sat all alone and played on his guqin. It did not take Lan Xichen long to recognize the sounds of his music and determine that it was Lan Sizhui. Not wanting to wake anybody up, he carefully plucked the strings, barely even touching them, but the melody was still as precise and smooth as it had always been when he would be playing in Cloud Recess. Zewu-Jun complimented him and advised to try and meditate if he could not fall asleep, to which Lan Sizhui readily agreed.

The pavilion stood solitary amid the clear waters of the lake, with only one narrow wooden bridge leading to it. Fluttering in the warm wind, ribbons of different hues of purple hung down from the beams while semi-transparent curtains protected the inside from the sunrays. The figure inside was sitting with its back to him, facing the view of the placid lake with only a few small ferries crossing it.

“Sect Leader Lan,” uttered the figure, still looking into the distance.

Lan Xichen entered the pavilion with careful gracious steps, not a single wooden floorboard creaking beneath his feet.

Jiang Cheng turned around and offered him a seat at the opposite side of the table that stood in the middle of the pavilion. Lan Xichen sat down and adjusted his robes, never disregarding his appearance.

“I apologize for bothering the Sect Leader. I do not have any pressing matters, so I shall leave if Sect Leader Jiang is willing to be alone now,” he said despite already having taken a seat.

Jiang Cheng offered him a plate of lotus seeds he had been mindlessly peeling while sitting in the pavilion for some time, the expression on his face milder than the last time the two saw each other.

“Please, be my guest, Zewu-Jun. I do not want to limit you in any way when you are visiting Lotus Pier. You are free to go wherever you like whenever you want,” he said.

Lan Xichen nodded and accepted his offering, taking a few seeds from the small porcelain plate decorated by lotus ornaments.

Hearing quiet breathing coming from below the table, Lan Xichen looked down and saw Jin Ling’s spiritual dog sleeping tight beside Jiang Cheng. It laid its head on one of his feet. He did not seem like he wanted it to move away.

Following Lan Xichen’s gaze, Jiang Cheng smiled with the corners of his lips and rolled his eyes, scratching the dog behind its black floppy ear with his slender pale fingers.

“It followed me all around the place and I could not get rid of it no matter what I did. It has always preferred Jin Ling over me, but today it seems to have set as its goal not leaving me alone for even a second.” His smile faded, and he spoke again. “Sect Leader Lan, I am truly sorry for what you had to see in the forest. My behaviour was inappropriate. I hope it will not diminish the relationships between the Lan sect and the Jiang sect. I also hope you will be able to forget this incident,” he said calmly.

Zewu-Jun looked at him, and their eyes met.

“It is not my task to judge if Sect Leader Jiang’s behaviour was wrong, so, please, do not trouble yourself with such thoughts. We are here to support the Jiang sect, be it on the nighthunt or beyond it. If Sect Leader Jiang wants me to feel comfortable, then my only wish would be for him to settle his relations with his nephew. We never wanted to disturb the peace in Lotus Pier with our arrival.”

“It is only fair for you to ask for that,” agreed Jiang Cheng and petted Fairy’s huge head that was now resting on his knees. The dog was drooling a bit on his neat clothing, but he did not mind.

“In fact, I came to Sect Leader Jiang with a proposal. I humbly ask for him to lend me his ears and see if it might interest him,” said Lan Xichen and laid his right hand atop his left hand on the table before him, not saying a word before Jiang Cheng agreed.

“It will be my honour,” replied Jiang Cheng with a nod.

“I understand that Sect Leader’s way of cultivation and of seeing the world is different from mine, but I cannot help but worry for his well-being,” started Lan Xichen carefully, checking if Jiang Cheng got upset over his words. No negative reaction followed, so he continued. “No matter the cause, Sect Leader Jiang seems to worry a lot lately. I am not here to annoy him with questions, of course, only to offer a helping hand. Even if Sect Leader Jiang is not experiencing any major inconveniences concerned with his accumulated emotional and physical exhaustion at the moment, the consequences of the qi deviation…” he gulped, gasped for air, and forcefully continued a bit louder to stop his voice from shaking, “the consequences might be dire. The last thing I would want to see is another person suffering from it because of my noninterference.”

“And Zewu-Jun’s proposal is…?” asked Jiang Cheng, his eyes opened wide and voice more curious than angry or displeased.

“The song of clarity. I could play it for Sect Leader Jiang once in a certain period of time if the offer does not seem too impudent,” finished Lan Xichen, looking up with tiny sparks of hope twinkling in his amber eyes.

“Could Sect Leader Lan play it on the xiao for me?” asked Jiang Cheng, turning away nonchalantly.

“I tend to play it on guqin, but if Sect Master Jiang prefers the xiao, then I will consider his wish,” replied Lan Xichen, his face lighting up.

“Then so be it. When shall we start?”

“Why not start today?” asked Lan Xichen, gently stroking Liebing.

Jiang Cheng laughed sonorously and leaned back against the wooden pillar behind him.

“Is Zewu-Jun afraid I will reconsider and refuse his offer if given the time? I would not take such a risk after I have already agreed out loud.”

“If Sect Leader Jiang says so, then I dare not have even a sliver of a doubt,” said Lan Xichen softly and took the white jade xiao in his hands, getting ready to play. In a matter of seconds, his weariness after the nighthunt seemed to disappear completely.

With a delicate musical instrument caressed by his fingers, snowy white robes of outmost cleanliness lightly tugged by the breaths of wind, and a cloud patterned ribbon coiling around his forehead and sliding down with the waves of his hair, he looked completely out of place. He eclipsed everything around him, and the surrounding looked duller when juxtaposed to his presence. And so, the gaze of an observer could only be directed at him, as nothing else was able to compete with the sight.

Jiang Cheng sat straight and closed his eyes. It was time for him to meditate.

Chapter 4: Intense

A few months have passed and not a single session of meditation was called off by either of the sides. What Lan Xichen defined as a “certain period of time” at first turned out to be two weeks due to him worrying that he might be too persistent, then gradually dwindled to one week, and finally ended up being only five days. As much as Jiang Cheng tried to persuade him not to come so often, worrying that he had to travel from Gusu to Yunmeng and back each time they arranged for a meditation, Lan Xichen was unshaken, seeing how Jiang Cheng did not really mean what he said. He wasn’t a very good liar and only said it out of courtesy, perhaps, not even trying to sound convincing.

Each time Lan Xichen mounted his sword to go to Lotus Pier, his disciples circled him in the yard and wished him good luck on his way there. They strongly believed their sect leader to be the most righteous and unselfish person to ever exist and were simply lost in admiration to him. Lately he tried to spend more time with them and dedicated every free minute he had to their teaching so that they wouldn’t miss their Huanguang-Jun so much. As Zewu-Jun was known to be an extremely kindhearted and gentle person, it did not take him long to make them cling to him every time he had to depart to play the song of clarity to the leader of the Jiang sect.

As much as Lan Xichen enjoyed staying in Lotus Pier, he still always tried to return as soon as he could, remembering that in his dear Cloud Recess there were these younglings that demanded constant attention and care. He would often hurry back without even giving the sect leader the honour of dining with him.

This time was no different.

He hung Liebing back on his waist, noting with delight that Jiang Cheng seemed much calmer after their regular meetings. He would still roll his eyes in irritation when Jin Ling suddenly barged in with his dog at his feet and a stupid question on his tongue and interrupt their session, but it was just a part of who he was. Notwithstanding, he never let himself repeat the nighthunt incident.

Zewu-Jun wanted to bid farewell and leave so as to get to Gusu before the sunset, but Jiang Cheng called to him, seeing how he had almost fled the main hall already.

“I know that Sect Master Lan is incredibly busy and already makes me a great favour by coming to Lotus Pier so often, but there was one more thing I wanted to ask of him,” he said, still sitting in his lotus throne on the dais.

Zewu-Jun turned around with overt curiosity in his eyes.

“I am anxious to hear what it might be,” he uttered.

“Jin Ling prepared some tea for Zewu-Jun and really wanted him to stay for a little while longer. Between the two of us, this child has never previously tried to do something for others out of his own volition, so I thought this opportunity could not be missed. Is there any chance that Zewu-Jun will find another hour to spend in Lotus Pier before departing? I am afraid, I will not be able to join in, but Jin Ling will surely keep the Sect Leader company.”

“If that pleases Sect Leader Jiang, then I will not refuse it this time,” bowed deeply Lan Xichen.

A sect disciple entered, greeted him politely, and proceeded to lead him to the chambers in which Jin Ling was awaiting their arrival.

The youth already squatted at the table behind a beautifully painted screen. His dog sat at the door as if guarding the room from intruders. It barked playfully when Lan Xichen entered.

“Zewu-Jun,” greeted him Jin Ling, bowing down with the sword in his locked hands. “Please, take a seat here, I will arrange everything. Why isn’t uncle Jiang with Zewu-Jun? Is he going to be late?”

“Sect Leader Jiang is unable to take part in the ceremony, Young Master Jin,” replied Lan Xichen, confused by Jin Ling not knowing about that.

“Wha-?”

Jin Ling stood with a teapot lid in one hand and glanced at Lan Xichen.

“Did he…? How unfair!” he muttered indignantly.

Remembering who sat before him, he pulled himself together and continued brewing the tea, annoyed at his uncle’s behaviour.

While waiting, Lan Xichen looked at a small exquisite object lying on his side of the table.

“Young Master Jin, could it be that this is one of Jiang sect’s clarity bells?” he asked, touching it gingerly.

“Yes, it is! Does Zewu-Jun like it?” asked Jin Ling in return, discarding the first brew and preparing the next one.

The bell looked fragile and sophisticated, with lotus petals of extreme detail carved on its surface. It was similar to the bells worn by Jiang sect disciples, but looked much more intricate and very carefully put together. When shook, it produced a clear sound that was pleasing to the ear, and, as known by many, due to the abundance of spiritual force inside, could easily clear the mind of its owner and help them regain their balance. Strangely enough, this one in particular had light-blue tassel attached to it instead of a purple one usually worn in Yunmeng.

“It may very well be the most beautiful one I have ever seen,” replied Lan Xichen, involuntarily starting twirling the tassel around his finger.

“What a relief! Uncle Jiang was worried Zewu-Jun would not see it fit,” said Jin Ling with enthusiasm and offered Lan Xichen a small cup of clear steaming tea.

Lan Xichen looked at him, his eyes testifying that he absolutely did not understand what Jin Ling was talking about.

Jin Ling mirrored his facial expression, his hand having stopped half the way to the bell on the table.

“Did he not even…? I…” he lowered his eyelids and let out a tired sigh. “I am sorry. Sect Leader Lan, this is a gift from uncle Jiang. He really appreciates your help and feels obliged to express his gratitude in this way. This clarity bell was made specifically for you, so not only does it hold more power than the regular one, but it also is a sign that you are a friend of the Jiang sect and to be respected all around these lands.”

Cursing his uncle for the fact that he was the one who had to say all of this, he took the bell and offered it to Zewu-Jun on the palms of his hands.

Lan Xichen silently took it, the long light-blue tassel so soft to the touch dangling as he held it. He thought that he could not accept such a gift, but Jin Ling was looking at him with eyes so full dignity for the quality of the object entrusted onto him, that he simply could not utter the words of refusal. After all, it was not the youngster’s decision to offer it.

He cupped the bell in his hands and bowed. After he hung it on the belt on his waist beside Liebing, he took the cup with tea that was now acceptable to drink, and made a small sip.

“Was there anything that Young Master Jin wanted to ask me while I am staying in Lotus Pier?” he asked, wanting to show how appreciative he was of the gift. He remembered that Jiang Cheng said something about Jin Ling wanting him to stay, and assumed it was for some particular reason.

Jin Ling’s eyes rounded in astonishment as it sounded as if he once again did not know of something necessary to understand the meaning of the question. Having realized the reason, he clenched his fist under the table, similarly to how his uncle would do it, and forced himself to smile.

“It is good that Zewu-Jun asked. There was this one thing about, eh, hm… about guqin that I do not quite… do not quite comprehend…” he began. His attempt was so feeble that was it not for how Lan Xichen always rejoiced over the younger generation seeking his wisdom, he would definitely understand that something was wrong.

“How interesting! What is it?” he asked, carefully sipping the tea.

“Well, um… so, there are these strings, and…”

Fairy yawned with its mouth open wide and stretched its front legs before lying down. It felt like letting down its guard for once.

Taking such a valuable and thoughtful gift, Lan Xichen, of course, was not able to not give anything in return. Being in Cloud Recess, he meandered around the disciple housings and chambers of the residence for the next day, musing over what he could give as a gift as worthy as the one he had received. His disciples followed him like little ducklings follow their mother, thinking that he had a complicated dilemma on his mind and wanting to be there when he would finally ask them for help.

Since the clarity bell was a very symbolic object for the Jiang sect, the only other thing of similar significance he could think of was the Lan forehead ribbon, but it was not even an option worth mentioning. Some sect members would consider even thinking about this to be unacceptable. Discarding it, he tried to remember what the leader on the Jiang sect liked.

The young disciples noticed the troubled face he tended to have every time he was thinking deeply about something, and exchanged worried glances.

It was certainly dogs, he thought to himself. Dogs and fighting. Also eating traditional Yunmeng dishes. For sure, not having to deal with other cultivators’ clans and being able to stay in Lotus Pier, watching over his sect. What he enjoyed occupying himself with while staying was training, spending time with Jin Ling on the nighthunts, some more trainings, and…

Suddenly, Lan Xichen’s face brightened up. He abruptly stood up from the bench, and his disciples stood up with him. They waited for him to finally say something to them, but all he did was leave them hastily without any explanations.

Lan Jingyi sighed disappointedly and followed the others to the library pavilion. There was nothing else for them to do at this time of the day other than study.

A few days later, Zewu-Jun yet again arrived in Lotus Pier, carrying a light oblong wooden box in his hands. The box looked elegant, but it was difficult to guess what was in it.

He came across Jiang Cheng in the training yard, exactly when he was teaching his disciples the sword stances. They repeated the movements in unison while he corrected every motion that seemed wrong to him.

“You, raise your hand higher! Are you holding your sword or a plough?” he yelled at one of them, hitting with his stiffened hand the shoulders and legs of those who stood too awkwardly or did not follow the guide with enough precision.

His disciples did not whine or cry for him to stop, only thoroughly obeyed his commands as best as they could.

Lan Xichen did not want to interrupt their lesson, but Jiang Cheng had already noticed him arrive.

“Sect Leader Lan,” he said and bowed, “I am sorry to keep you waiting, but I need to finish the training before I can join you in the great hall.”

He threw a quick glance at the bell hanging on Lan Xichen’s waist and hastily turned away so that his guest wouldn’t notice. However, the white box in Zewu-Jun’s hands immediately drew his attention back, and he started examining it with interest.

“It goes without saying, Sect Leader Jiang,” replied Zewu-Jun.

Jiang Cheng was not able to hide the curiosity in his eyes, so Lan Xichen spoke again before he got the chance to ask anything.

“This is just a little something I brought for Sect Leader Jiang,” he said and smiled, his eyes adopting the shape of crescents.

Jiang Cheng gulped and nodded. It was so obvious that he wanted to immediately find out what it was, but since he asked nothing, Lan Xichen just proceeded to the great hall, not to disturb the training with his presence. He expected having to wait for at least half an hour, but Jiang Cheng joined him about five minutes later.

“I sincerely hope the training is over not because of me arriving so early today,” remorsefully commented Lan Xichen, sitting at one of the tables in the hall.

“Absolutely not. We were… already finishing anyway,” murmured Jiang Cheng and halted a few steps into the room as if musing about something. He then took a seat on his throne, unable to hide his excitement.

Zewu-Jun stood up and approached the dais. He held up the box in his hands and bowed his head ever so slightly, presenting his gift to Jiang Cheng.

Jiang Cheng hesitated before extremely carefully opening the lid. Inside on a soft white pillow laid a long xiao made of lavender jasper. It looked unusual due to the colour of the stone being uneven and at places pierced by white and yellowish veins.

Confused, he did not find anything he could say to such a gift, and only took the xiao out of the box with his slightly trembling fingers, for some reason being infinitely scared to drop it on the floor. It looked like it would instantly break to pieces from taking such a fall.

“I was reflecting a lot upon the gift I could give to Sect Leader Jiang, and having remembered all of the sessions we have conducted so far, I realized that the best gift I could give to him was this,” said Lan Xichen proudly.

It was true that he had put much thought into the gift he decided give to the leader of the Jiang sect. After carefully considering all of the possibilities, he arrived at the conclusion that xaio was indeed the most meaningful and symbolic of all of them, as he intended it to become his display of trust, sincerity, and care. Despite the instrument being so similar to his own, it actually was only recently created by skillful masters specifically for this occasion. The material, the carvings, and even the shape was chosen by Lan Xichen personally with him taking into account peculiar personality and likes of its future owner.

Jiang Cheng smiled awkwardly and inspected the instrument in his hands.

“Now that I can learn to play myself, I will not have to bother Sect Leader Lan and ask him to come to the sessions…” he mumbled unconfidently.

“That is certainly a possibility,” replied Lan Xichen, still smiling, “but the song of clarity is infamous for its difficulty, so I wouldn’t expect that to happen in the nearest future. If the Sect Leader is willing, I could try and teach him to play something, be the moment suitable.”

“If I am willing?” asked Jiang Cheng and raised his eyes from the xiao. “I thought, Zewu-Jun gave me this gift so that I could learn how to play and…” he finished uncertainly, not knowing what was it exactly that he wanted to say.

“I only thought Sect Leader Jiang enjoyed these meetings, and wanted to give him something that would remind him of them. It also seems like Sect Leader Jiang finds pleasure in listening to the sound of xiao, so I would be eager to teach him if he decided that he wanted to play on his own someday,” said Lan Xichen, a little upset by Jiang Cheng’s rection.

Jiang Cheng positioned the xiao as if he wanted to try and blow in it, but then decided not to. He noted that it was quite nice to the touch, the stone being smooth and cool. He put it back into the box and took the box from Lan Xichen’s hands, bowing deeply.

“Thank you, Sect Leader Lan, I will treasure it. I don’t think I am ready to learn yet, but, please, know that I view this as a very thoughtful and useful present.”

“Does… Sect Leader Jiang really like it?” asked Zewu-Jun, unconsciously tugging on the bell on his waist, unconvinced by his words.

“Its beauty is unparalleled and it is remarkably strong as a spiritual weapon. Much to my displeasure, it would simply be disrespectful towards such an instrument if I used it before giving it a proper name,” answered Jiang Cheng and smiled, this time more sincerely. There was kindness in his eyes, so it seemed like he did not make up what he was saying anymore.

Lan Xichen sighed with relief. When it came to Jiang Cheng, one could never be sure of what his reaction would be to anything he was presented with, at least if it was not puppies he was gifted.

“Shall we begin the session then?” he asked.

“It is high time,” replied Jiang Cheng. He went back to his throne and sat down, putting the box close to him.

As their meetings passed, they gifted each other a few more other things, though, less significant than the clarity bell and the xiao.

Chapter 5: Charming

Lan Xichen knew that he might not get another opportunity like this in a very long time. It was quite a lucky coincidence that Wei Wuxian just happened to be visiting Lotus Pier again when he himself felt like he could not keep the unanswered questions in him any longer.

“Young Master Wei, may I take a few minutes of your time?” he asked, running into him near the same pond they spoke at a few months back.

“Of course, Zewu-Jun. I am all ears,” answered Wei Wuxian and curiously peeked at Lan Xichen’s worried face.

“I wanted to speak to you about… Sect Leader Jiang. If you have nothing against it.”

“Correct me if I’m wrong, Zewu-Jun, but doesn’t one of the Lan sect core rules prohibit discussing others behind their backs?” asked Wei Wuxian mockingly.

Lan Xichen barely ever felt like the rules of his sect were unfair or obliging them hindered him in any way, but it was really starting to become a much bigger problem when the outsiders knew of them as well.

“It looks like I have been exposed,” he said and let out a nervous laugh. “But if you know me well, Young Master Wei, you realize that I would not have asked, had it not been something of utmost importance.”

“That is true,” agreed Wei Wuxian. “I will answer your question with all honesty and I promise not to tell anyone of your secret,” he said and jokingly raised three fingers as if taking an oath.

“Very well. Did something happen to Sect Leader…” Lan Xichen stopped mid-sentence and shook his head – no, that was not it. “Did I do anything to Sect Leader Jiang?” he tried again. “Did I say something insulting? Was it that he considered some of my actions unacceptable for some reason?”

Wei Wuxian frowned in an exaggerated manner and put a finger to his lips.

“I cannot think of anything Zewu-Jun could possibly do to offend Jiang Cheng, only the other way around. What makes Zewu-Jun think something like that has ever happened?”

Lan Xichen sighed. There was no other possibility for him to get the answer he so desperately needed other than sharing his observations. It was incredibly hard for him to partake in a conversation of this sort, but he managed to persuade himself that he was doing it for the greater good.

“I noticed how Sect Leader Jiang was looking at me. It might be nothing and I might worry for no reason, but I felt like he was deeply insulted by my mere presence. He just looked so enraged and unhappy. It happened a few times, and each time I felt the same resentment coming from him. Unfortunately, I cannot arrive at any conclusion as to what makes him behave like this without any help from the outside.”

“So, Sect Leader Lan is telling me that Jiang Cheng has been staring at him constantly, looking like he is on the edge of bursting?” concluded briefly Wei Ying.

Lan Xichen did not answer as this paraphrasing of what he had said seemed too crude to agree to.

“Well,” blurted Wie Wuxian, not really needing any answer at all, and stuffed his mouth with a bunch of lotus seeds before continuing, “then he must have fancied you.”

“I beg your pardon?” asked Lan Xichen dumbfoundedly. Wei Wuxian found it incredibly amusing and thought that never before had he seen the leader of the Gusu Lan sect having such an odd expression on his face.

“I said that he had taken a liking to Zewu-Jun,” he explained, taking pity on his interlocutor. “But he is probably so undecisive in his attraction that he just struggles with it all the time, and it is reflected in his appearance.”

“But…” stumbled Lan Xichen, failing to finish his utterance.

“He has always been like that as a child – too proud to go the easy way. Always pretends not to care for something he wants for himself so that others would not notice his weakness. Some people just prefer to suffer, I guess. Although, I must admit, never before have I seen him this agitated about something.”

“But…” ventured Lan Xichen again, but still wasn’t able to find any suitable words.

“But what do I know?” laughed suddenly Wei Wuxian. “I haven’t been beside him for so many years, it’s not like he couldn’t have changed during this time, right?”

Lan Xichen did not know if he was to protest or quietly sigh at such a remark.

“Please, Sect Leader Lan, disregard what I said if it makes you feel better. In any case, there is no person that can give you the right answer apart from Jiang Cheng himself, so if he is not talking… You can always make him,” said Wei Wuxian instructively and grinned.

Lan Xichen stood silently and kept looking at Wei Wuxian who was still nonchalantly stuffing his mouth with peeled lotus seeds. He had heard his every word but still somehow felt as if nothing made sense to him. He was confused, but very quickly his confusion started to evolve into something else, something restless and almost raging. All this time he was worried sick that he somehow offended Jiang Cheng, that he was careless enough to say or do something unforgivable, something that made this person hate him so much that it was difficult for Jiang Cheng to be in the same room with him. He would certainly have called this situation ridiculous, had he not spent so many hours contemplating on his own attitude and behaviour because of all this.

“Just give it a try,” said Wei Ying, tired of Lan Xichen standing there, unable to utter a word to him, and pointed to the entrance to the great hall. “He’s in his quarters now, reading one of the books Sect Leader Lan gave him.”

Lan Xichen thought that he would try. There was no point in beating around the bush anymore. After all, he wasn’t sure if he should believe Wei Wuxian. On the one hand, he would gain absolutely nothing by lying about this, on the other hand though, he could still not be trusted so easily. The only natural solution to this problem was speaking to Jiang Cheng, and Lan Xichen already regretted not having done it earlier. Maybe, it would’ve made his life much, much easier.

Not stopping for any distractions on his way, he rushed inside to find Jiang Cheng and finally clarify the relationships between them. He was in such a hurry that he even forgot to thank Wei Wuxian for his help which was something the latter one never expected would happen.

His heart skipped a beat when he finally came across Jiang Cheng’s figure resting with a book in his hand in his private chambers. He took a few deep breaths, seemingly being able to calm down considerably, and entered without even a knock or a cough.

“Sect Leader Jiang,” he thundered, startling Jiang Cheng, “I came here to talk. I hope you will be able to spare me a minute of your time as I consider the topic I want to discuss to be of great significance.”

Jiang Cheng threw a puzzled glance at him, but still closed his book and carefully put it away. He would’ve agreed to whatever Zewu-Jun wanted to do anyway, but seeing him so agitated really convinced him it was a matter that was not to be taken lightly.

“Of course. Whatever it is that Sect Leader Lan wanted to discuss, I will be glad to provide my assistance and insight,” he replied and motioned for Lan Xichen to sit down with him, but Xichen couldn’t be less bothered by that, so he remained standing.

“It is about the feelings of a certain person present in the room. Lately I’ve been experiencing… difficulties understanding them, so I decided to come and ask directly. Please, tell me, Sect Leader Jiang, what do you think of me? I cannot help but become frustrated with your behaviour and… find myself cornered. Is there, perhaps, something you would like to tell me? Something, that would make it all clear to me? I just find continuing like this… really hard.”

Immediately after saying that Lan Xichen felt easier already. Even though he did not yet get any explanation whatsoever, venting about the feeling of frustration that accompanied him for quite some time now made his head clearer and his heart lighter. Now he only needed to hear what Jiang Cheng had to tell him, and everything would fall back on its places, everything would be easy and definite for him, just the way it should be.

Jiang Cheng’s shoulders suddenly curved forward. With a brooding expression overtaking his face, he fixed his eyes at the book on the table and thought that it was all over for him. Nothing would be the same anymore, no matter how hard he tried.

“I am sorry, Sect Leader Lan…” he began, and Lan Xichen already got his hopes up only for them to be shattered by his next words. “I really have nothing to say. It pains to hear me that you felt this way for some reason, but I have nothing to share with you. Now, if you don’t mind…”

All the lightness disappeared from Lan Xichen’s chest. The energy that was flowing out of him suddenly got tied in a tight knot, and he thought that it really was unbearable. Dealing with such a person, constantly guessing what was on their mind, trying to piece together what they told you and what they displayed on their face… One had to be in possession of a constant supply of patience and understanding to be able to put up with it. He realized that he probably wasn’t the one capable of that.

“Jiang Wanyin! Do you think I will not know what you have on your mind if you do not speak up?” he thundered, looking Jiang Cheng straight in the eyes. There was no other way for him to proceed, at least he saw none at the moment when he decided to raise his voice.

Jiang Cheng’s eyes rounded at first, but then screwed as he smiled almost mischievously. He almost felt like letting out a grin despite the situation he was in seemingly being quite serious.

Lan Xichen immediately regretted asserting himself and tried to retreat. Under Jiang Cheng’s mocking glance, he did not know where to hide, and the tips of his ears reddened a bit from embarrassment for how he behaved. Hearing his own voice being so loud and forceful when addressing somebody who probably also struggled with their thoughts and feelings for some time, he immediately became upset and realized that he shouldn’t have poured everything that he had on his mind with little to no consideration about the effect it would produce.

“I… I did not mean to say it like that, Sandu Sengshou. Please, forgive me,” he muttered and pinched his lips.

Jiang Cheng produced a few harsh laughs and tilted his head to the side, derisive attitude not disappearing from his posture. It was surprising how fast he could go from upset to self-righteous with almost no effort.

“Oh, please, Sect Leader Lan, do not ruin my impression of you with apologies. Seeing this side of you is not something many can brag about. How can I even be mad?” he asked in a frivolous way. He thought many times about how this conversation would go, and he had no doubts that it would take place someday, but not even once did he imagine such an involved reaction from Lan Xichen’s side. Everything was not happening as he had expected and it made him feel excitement mixed with a pinch of fright in regards to what could follow next.

The blush from Lan Xichen’s ears slowly crawled to his face. For a person like him it was a completely disaster, losing control over himself in such a manner.

“Nevertheless, I am truly sorry for using your courtesy name so carelessly when I did not have the right to do it. For us to be even, the only thing I can do is tell you mine, so that you could also-”

“Lan Huan,” said Jiang Cheng hoarsely, purposefully interrupting Lan Xichen and thoroughly articulating every syllable. “Here you go,” he added, delighted at Lan Xichen’s confused face. “I also said it, now Zewu-Jun does not have to worry about being disrespectful.”

After the man before him called him by his courtesy name, hearing “Zewu-Jun” again felt strange to Lan Xichen. Realizing that, he said, almost whispering, “It sounded good.” Everything started to make sense for him suddenly. It turned out that this whole time Jiang Cheng was not the only one perplexed and unable to express what he was feeling.

A smug smile slowly faded from Jiang Cheng’s face. Light pink covered his cheeks, and he sat there, completely lost.

“What?” he finally managed to mumble, frowning to hide his own daze now.

“You calling my name,” said Lan Xichen quietly, beginning to understand. It was probably still a long road for them to go, but with him now having a vague idea of what he wanted to hear and what he wanted to say in return, it would undoubtedly become an easier journey for both of them.

“Lan… Huan?” ventured Jiang Cheng again, this time not confident at all.

“Yes?”

“I thought, maybe we could… practice playing the xiao together?” asked Jiang Cheng carefully. The instrument gifted to him by Lan Xichen was lying in its box on a special display in his chambers.

If it was how he tried to escape the topic, thought Lan Xichen, then it was quite an entertaining attempt. Not that there was even the slightest chance it would work, though, no. He just found it somehow sweet, and so decided to play along, not to rob his interlocutor of his temporary safe harbour.

“Have you already given a name to it?” he asked with sincere interest in his voice.

“I have not. But I also thought… if I continue to do everything the same way I did, nothing will ever change for me,” said Jiang Cheng, and Lan Xichen immediately realized that there had to be more to his words. He also realized he had been standing this whole time, so he hurried to sit down and stop trying to intimidate Jaing Cheng with his erect posture.

“And you want something to change?” he asked gingerly.

“I think so.”

Lan Xichen almost wanted to go ahead and ask what exactly Jiang Cheng had on his mind, but it took him too long to gain the courage for it, so Jiang Cheng spoke again.

“Will you help me find a suitable name for the xiao?” he asked in such a voice as though it was something he had been wanting to ask for a very long time.

“What makes you think I am the right person to ask?”

Jiang Cheng threw a quick unreadable glance at him before shaking his head and turning away.

“…It is nothing, I will do it myself.”

“I do not refuse!” said Lan Xichen, perhaps, more eagerly than he would want to admit. “I am just… curious.”

“I cannot say it,” answered Jiang Cheng, still carefully examining the wall.

“Why?”

Lan Xichen felt his heart pounding like never before. He was afraid to admit that he hoped for some specific outcome of this conversation. The atmosphere became so peculiar and tense that he simply did not know how to calm himself down anymore.

“It might change everything for me,” said Jiang Cheng quietly.

“Didn’t you say you wanted something to change, Jiang Wanyin?” asked Lan Xichen. For some reason, he couldn’t stop himself from being persistent in his inquiries.

Jiang Cheng sighed uneasily and frowned again as if overcoming some internal struggles.

“Why is it that you have to suddenly be so pushy today?” he asked, trying to avoid giving any direct answer again.

“I thought you liked it when I was like this,” said Lan Xichen, feeling the wave of heat hitting his cheeks. It was a new feeling to him, wanting to say something like that despite his mind doing its best to prevent him from doing that.

“Mn,” only let out Jiang Cheng.

“Will you answer me?”

“No,” said Jiang Cheng, shaking his head. He stood up and turned away. He felt like his face was burning. He could neither stop this conversation nor suffer through it, so made a decision to go for the door in a very foolish and desperate attempt to escape the room and flee to the corridor which was flooded with people among whom he would feel safe again.

“Why is it that you suddenly turn out to be such a coward?” asked Lan Xichen with a tone of minor annoyance in his voice and grabbed Jiang Cheng by his wrist, reaching out over the table.

Jaing Cheng clenched his fists and stopped.

“I am many things, but I am not a coward,” he said resolutely.

Lan Xichen took away his hand, fearing he had already overdone it and wounded Jiang Cheng’s pride. During those few seconds he held his wrist, he felt a quickened pulse, as quick as his own, beating under tense skin.

“Why don’t you face me when we are conversing?” he asked, trying to make Jaing Cheng stay and bring it all to a least some sort of conclusion.

“I thought the talk was already over,” uttered Jiang Cheng, but still did what Zewu-Jun wanted him to.

“Do you remember what I told you earlier?” asked Lan Xichen.

“That it pleases you when I call you by your name?” asked Jiang Cheng in return. He had to force himself to say that, of course, but he simply could not remain the only one cornered because he had to listen to something that was so embarrassing for him.

“N-no, not that,” stumbled Lan Xichen and sighed, covering his forehead and eyes with his hand. “I said that even if you didn’t say what was on your mind aloud, I would still know.”

Jiang Cheng had a vague idea of where that knowledge could come from, but decided not to voice his suppositions. It was no use bringing it up now, he would still not escape the problematic topic and only enrage himself.

“If you already know, then what else do you expect me to say? Maybe, you just also find making fun of me amusing?”

“You might have noticed that I am not laughing. And I would not call your behaviour amusing at all,” answered Lan Xichen with a truly straight face.

“Then what would you call it?”

“Charming.”

As abruptly as it came, all the arrogance disappeared from Jiang Cheng’s demeanor and he silently gasped, not knowing how to react or where to hide from Lan Xichen’s gaze. He would give everything to be in his yard, training his disciples, or in the forest, stalking a prey with his nephew. He would take anything, but not this.

“I… I do not know what we are talking about anymore,” he honestly admitted. He was perplexed at how they arrived here, trying to remember how such a conversation could have started.

Lan Xichen unfastened the clarity bell from his waist and displayed it on the palm of his hand on the table for Jiang Cheng to see.

“We are talking about your feelings,” he said more calmly. He realized he had to take the situation into his own hands or else they would never be able to resolve what they both got into. “If you really have nothing to say to me right now, then you can take this bell back.”

“And then what?” asked Jiang Cheng, expecting the worst.

“Nothing, I will just give it back to you. That is all.”

“But it was my gift to you,” muttered Jiang Cheng and Lan Zewu-Jun noticed how hurt he sounded.

“How should I know? You did not give it to me,” he shrugged his shoulders.

“But I… ugh.”

Jiang Cheng gritted his teeth. He could not say that he left the bell there for him and intentionally did not come, hoping that Jin Ling would do all the talking for him. There was really no way out for him anymore.

“It was me who carved it. A certain person once taught me how to do it, so I… I carved it for you. That is why I want you to keep it,” he finally admitted, realizing how funny and unnatural being so honest with someone felt.

“Thank you. For the bell, and for telling me,” said Lan Xichen and bowed slightly. He attached the bell back where it belonged with a look of contentment as if he did not want anything else.

“That is all?” asked Jiang Cheng. He unwillingly expected that he would have to say… more than that.

“All that I needed to hear,” nodded Lan Xichen.

He reached to the back of his head, where his forehead ribbon entwined with his hair, and untied it, letting it slide.

Jiang Cheng shook his head in disbelief and slowly backed away from the table. Before, it was all just talking, but now he knew how serious it was. He was absolutely not ready to bear the burden of such a responsibility.

“No, I cannot… I cannot…” he mumbled.

“What?” asked Lan Xichen as if completely oblivious to what was happening.

“I cannot… touch it.”

Lan Xichen smiled amiably and laid the ribbon on the table between them. Seeing him exclusively with his forehead ribbon on, Jiang Cheng felt almost uncomfortable looking at him without it, as if it was something too personal, like watching a person bathing. There was no drastic change in his appearance, of course, but something about him still seemed different.

“I made you feel vulnerable, and now I understand that. This is my way of showing you that I realize that and am willing to endure it with you. But it doesn’t mean I am going to let you touch the ribbon,” explained Zewu-Jun.

Jiang Cheng felt his body relax. He suddenly felt very light, but also very empty, as if something abandoned his chest without him agreeing to it. He quietly exhaled.

“I see,” he only uttered in return.

“…As that you will have to earn first,” added Lan Xichen. He tried hard to stay serious, but his lips involuntarily curved into a smile.

Jiang Cheng opened his mouth, but could not say anything. A peculiar mixture of emotion displayed on his face as he was trying hard to figure out if it was him understanding the occurrences correctly or just his wishful thinking tricking him into believing that.

He rose up from the floor yet again, his chest heaving. His eyes were staring intently at Lan Xichen and his top lip twitched a few times. Lan Xichen felt that it was almost the same look that haunted him previously, threatening, aggressive, unpredictable. But it wasn’t scary at all. Charming was still what he thought of it.

Jiang Cheng bent down with determination in his every movement, grabbed Lan Xichen by the lapels of his robes and leaned in for a kiss. He could not tolerate that smile on his face and that confidence in his words. He still felt like he was teased and ridiculed, and so he grabbed the lapels tighter, almost pulling Lan Xichen up from his seat. Their teeth clanked a couple of times because of Jiang Cheng’s vigour, but he did not even care. His only concern was the emotions that he was not able to get rid of for so long, so he clung to Zewu-Jun as if it was the last time he saw him.

When the latter one managed to steady his position in Jiang Cheng’s grip, he slowly stood up, trying to use the fact that he was a bit taller than the leader of the Jiang sect as an advantage, even though the table between them remained quite an obstacle.

He finally made up his mind and touched the side of Jiang Cheng’s pale face with his fingers. He caressed it lightly and moved his hand further, passing the ear and the braid that was neatly stuck into the bun on the back of his head. He touched the ink-black hair airily a few times, as if afraid to ruin the perfect hair-do. His heart was loudly pounding in his ears. He put his other hand on Jiang Cheng’s waist and slowly pulled him closer.

Feeling the grip on his side, Jiang Cheng sprung away from Lan Xichen as if electrocuted. He adjusted his clothes nervously and laid his hand on the side of the neck, avoiding direct eye contact.

“You…”

“My hand slipped. I am sorry,” muttered Zewu-Jun, a bit disappointed that everything ended as suddenly as it had begun. Sorry was the last thing that he was now.

Jiang Cheng pouted either at what had happened or at how shamelessly Lan Xichen tried to lie to him.

“Isn’t Sect Leader Lan late to Cloud Recess?” he asked with indignation in his voice. “I am sure the Gusu Lan disciples are already waiting ardently for his return.

Lan Xichen closed the distance between them in a few swift steps. There was no table to separate them anymore, and he found himself not even caring if somebody walked in on them right now as he slid both of his hands on Jiang Cheng’s waist, drawing him closer.

“Right now, I have some more pressing matters to attend to. I am sure they will understand,” he whispered and leaned for another kiss.

#Mo Dao Zu Shi #Grandmaster of Demonic cultivation #fiction #fanfiction #Jiang Cheng #Lan Xichen #jiang cheng x lan xichen #romance #comfort #fluff #Wei Wuxian #Lan Wangji #Jin Ling #untamed #untamed fanfiction

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hearts-hunger · 3 years

Text

dralshy’a ka’ra (brighter stars): chapter five || din djarin x reader

Read on AO3 | Masterlist

chapter one | chapter two | chapter three | chapter four

Series Summary: In the lake country of Naboo, you and Din romance each other under summer’s brighter stars. || Part Two of Jate’kara (Lucky Stars)

Chapter Summary: You and Din enjoy the last days of your trip.

Pairings: Din Djarin x Wife!Reader

Genre: Pure fluff | Word Count: 2.8k

Warnings: None!

A/N: Hello! It’s been a hot minute since the last chapter! I know I said this was going to be the last chapter of the series, but I wrote too much fluff and had to break it up into two chapters. Chapter six will be up tomorrow, and I hope you like this one! ♡

The rest of your trip passed blissfully. You drank up every moment you had with your husband, careful not to let any moment pass without a grateful appreciation of it. It would be a long time before you could indulge in such a long, restful trip like this again, and there was much to be done when you returned to your “real” life. Until then, though, you and Din both enjoyed your time together.

He took you dancing one night, in the city square where musicians played as the sun set. He was graceful even in his armor, and the pair of you caught many curious gazes. Mandalorians weren’t known for dancing, but Din was open and friendly to everyone around you; when you stopped to catch your breath for a dance, Din had a gaggle of children asking him to dance with them. He let them stand on his boots while they danced and allowed them to put their little hands on the shiny beskar that entranced them so, a laugh coming through his vocoder whenever one of the children called it “pretty”. It reminded you of the way he played with your baby; as you often did, you found yourself very glad you had married a man so gentle and kind to children.

You asked him to take you to the beach, and he very selflessly obliged you, even if it meant tramping over the sand in full armor. He declined to go near the water and settled on a dune nearby to watch as you let the waves run over your feet. You smiled as you watched him - he was a funny sight, in all his beskar, sitting on the sand like he hadn’t a care in the world. You waved to him and were pleased when he waved back.

“How do Mandalorians enjoy any leisure time in full armor?” you asked, walking up the beach to sit next to him. You buried your feet in the warm sand and leaned your head on his shoulder.

He laughed. “We don’t really do leisure, cyare. At least, I’ve never known a Mandalorian who didn’t have full armor on every time they left the covert.”

You traced your fingers over his chest plate; your fingers were still wet from the water, and you left little droplets over the surface of the beskar.

“What if you had to dive in the water and save me?” you asked. You’d pestered him with hypothetical, Mandalorian-related questions often enough to know he didn’t mind them, and in fact liked giving you the answers you sought. “Wouldn’t your armor be very heavy?”

“Yes, it would,” he said. “We had to do training exercises, when I was younger, to make sure we were strong enough to swim with our armor on.”

“But you’d do it for me.”

You knew he was smiling under the helm. “Yes, cyar’ika. I’d do it for you.”

You laid back on the sand, shaded from the sun by his broad shoulders. “And what if you wanted to make love to a beautiful woman on the beach?” you asked.

He patted your thigh. “I’d say I wouldn't be caught dead with my armor off like that, and the sand would make it miserable anyways. Even as much as I wanted to.”

You laughed and pulled on his arm to lift yourself back up, resting your head against his back. You ran your hand under his cloak, settling between his shoulder blades.

“Can you feel my hand?” you asked. He wore so many layers that you sometimes couldn’t tell if he could feel you or not.

He hummed in agreement. “I always feel you, cyare. Your touch could go through beskar.”

You smiled. “You’re very sweet to me, you know that?”

He looked over at you and gently bumped his helm against your head.

“I love you,” he said simply.

You stayed like that for a while, listening to the sound of the waves and the lake birds. A mother and her two children claimed a spot a little down the beach from you, and the sound of the children’s laughter mixed with the sound of the surf.

The littlest one couldn’t have been but two years old, toddling with his older sister down to the water to gleefully splash in the gentle waves. You smiled as you watched them play, and weren’t entirely surprised when you felt an ache in your chest at it.

“I miss our baby,” you said.

He straightened; you knew he’d been watching the children too.

“I miss him too,” he said. “I was thinking how much he would like it here.”

You laughed a little. You could just imagine the kinds of mischief your little one would get up to, running headfirst into the water in search of fish eggs to snack on.

“We’ll bring him, one day,” you said. “My parents miss him, and one day we’ll be safe enough to come and stay for a long time.”

Din’s hand found yours, and you held on tightly.

“Thank you for your patience with... all of it,” he said sincerely. “And your faith in me. After some of the things I’ve gotten us into, I sometimes can’t believe you put up with me.”

You gave a soft laugh and wrapped your arm around his, resting on his solid, steady frame.

“Fair’s fair,” you said. “You put up with me, so it’s the least I can do. Besides, my life would be so boring if I’d stayed here.”

He chuckled. “I guess that’s one word for it.”

He watched the children playing, building a sandcastle just near enough to the water that the waves would eventually topple it.

“We should head to Sorgan tomorrow,” he said. “If that’s alright with you.”

“Wherever you go, I go,” you said simply. If he thought it was best, you’d leave Naboo tomorrow and gather your son before you headed off wherever in the galaxy he needed to go next.

You touched your knuckles to his neck, right under the lip of his helmet. He pulled away from you a little and actually giggled.

“You hate it when I do that, don’t you?” you asked, amused. You could listen to his laugh forever, especially one as surprising and joyful as that.

“No, I don’t hate it,” he said, and you could hear his smile. He relaxed against you again. “I’m just ticklish, that’s all.”

“I won’t tell anybody,” you teased. “It’s very cute, though.”

“Oh yeah?”

He grabbed you by the waist and tickled you mercilessly until you conceded defeat, doubled over in laughter as you grabbed hold of his hands. He held you close to him, chuckling he listened to you laugh, and you were so glad you were married to him. You were so glad you loved a man as kind and good as he was, with hands that would only ever touch you in love, with a body that would defend you until his last breath, with a heart so deeply bonded to yours that to love him was as easy as breathing.

“You have to teach me more Mando’a,” you said.

He chuckled. “Okay,” he agreed. “Just in general? Or is there something specific you want to know how to say?”

“Well, both,” you admitted. “But right now I wish I could say something to you.”

You felt a little embarrassed - maybe it was silly of you to want to speak his own language to him. “Even though I probably won’t pronounce it right and I should probably just stick to Basic.”

“I don’t mind,” he said sweetly. “I love your voice no matter what language you speak, even if your pronunciation is terrible.”

You gave him a light nudge with your shoulder, drawing a gentle laugh through his modulator.

“I’d love to teach you Mando’a if you want,” he said.

“You won’t ever make fun of me?”

“No, love. I won’t make fun of you.” He rested his helm against your head. “Tell me what you want to say, cyar’ika.”

You brought your hand to rest on the side of his helm. “Teach me... ‘you are my heart’s home’.”

“Hm. That would be... gar ner yaim be kar’ta. You are the home of my heart.”

You repeated it back to him. “How was that?”

“Perfect,” he said. “You’re the home of my heart, too.”

You put your arms around his neck and let him hold you. On Naboo or on the Crest, on the run or on a warm summer afternoon, it would be the same no matter where you were. He was your home, and you were his, no matter where in the galaxy you went.

You carefully packed away your beautiful dress in your chest of clothes aboard the Crest, taking the time to wrap it back in its paper and place it so it wouldn’t wrinkle. You didn’t know when you’d be able to wear it again, but you cherished it and the kindness of your husband in giving it to you. The memory of it would serve you well until you could put it on again.

Din finished his once-over of the ship, checking to make sure everything was as it should be, and called you up to the cockpit as he started the power-up sequence. The Crest hummed pleasantly as her engines came to life under Din’s familiar hand, and your emotions were a little bittersweet as you listened to the Crest and looked out at the bay and the docks filled with people coming and going from their ships.

“You alright?”

You started a little at the sound of his voice, even gentle as it was, but he steadied you with a hand on the small of your back.

He chuckled. “Didn’t mean to scare you,” he said, affectionately running his thumb back and forth. “Everything ok?”

You hadn’t taken your usual seat behind him, even though you knew he was ready to leave and the Crest awaited his direction. You turned to face him.

“Yes, sorry,” you said. “I was just... people-watching, I guess. You’re ready to go?”

He hummed in agreement. “Everything’s set. But you can people-watch for a few more minutes, if you want.”

You smiled. He understood your reluctance to leave and wanted to make it easier on you if he could. You reached your hand out towards him and he took it without hesitation.

“You’ll miss it, won’t you?” he asked. There was no judgement in his tone, only understanding and sympathy.

You sighed. “Yes, I will,” you admitted. You squeezed his hand. “But I’m ready to see our baby, and we have things to do. It’s time to go.”

He tugged you towards him, gently, and spread his knees for you to stand between them. He looked up at you, cocking his head slightly as he studied your face.

“How did a pretty thing like you end up with someone like me?” he asked. “Weren’t there any ruggedly handsome guys on Naboo who wanted to marry you?”

You smiled. “I had an offer or two,” you teased. You had in fact gotten one marriage proposal before Din’s, but it had been from an arrogant young man who hadn’t bothered to woo you at all - perhaps thinking his proposal was flattering enough - and saw you as nothing more than another achievement to add to his list.

Even with his helmet on, you could read your husband’s distaste as plain as day.

“Don’t remind me,” he said, his tone just as uneasy as the day you’d first told him that story. “I was only being rhetorical when I asked.”

You laughed, genuine and deep and full of love for him. You felt his gentle grip on your waist tighten with affection, and you kissed the top of his helm.

“I’m glad I didn’t accept any other proposals,” you said needlessly. Din knew that, but you thought he might like to be reminded every so often. You rested your hand on his shoulder, toying with the fabric of his cloak.

“I didn’t want to marry any of the ruggedly handsome guys on Naboo,” you said. “I wanted to marry a very religious man who could have been a Gungan, for all I knew.”

Din snorted. You giggled and drew his hand up so you could pepper gentle kisses across his knuckles.

“I wanted to marry someone with kind eyes and an easy smile,” you said gently. “I wanted to marry someone with beautiful curly hair and big, strong shoulders. Someone who loves to laugh with me and takes care of me and my babies.”

You pressed his knuckles to your mouth and looked steadily into his visor, knowing you had his full attention. He was sweetly willing against your touch, allowing you to take your time, waiting for you to speak again.

“I wanted to marry someone who takes me on grand adventures across the stars,” you said.

He didn’t say anything, and you wondered what he was thinking. He released his hold on your waist and took his hand from yours, and you briefly worried that you’d offended him somehow. Your fears were soothed as he reached up to take off his helmet and set it on his thigh. The deep love and unwavering devotion in his expression warmed you from head to toe, and you couldn’t help a lovesick smile as he pulled you down to sit on his lap.

“I love you,” he said. You knew it meant a million things he couldn’t figure out how to say, and you leaned closer against him as he put his arm around your waist.

“I love you,” you said back. His curls were mussed, as they always were when he first took his helmet off, and you brushed your fingers through them.

He smiled. “Happy with your scruffy Mandalorian who takes you on grand adventures and gets into trouble with the law for getting you a baby?”

You beamed at him. “Perfectly,” you said. “I wouldn’t have you any other way, Din Djarin.”

He kissed you deeply, drawing you close to him; you put your arms around his neck and let him hold you.

After a few long moments you spent lost in each other, the Crest started a soft, slightly impatient alarm to indicate she was ready and waiting. Din fumbled around blindly to shut it off, still kissing you, and you laughed against his mouth.

“You other lady’s getting jealous,” you teased.

He gave you quick, gentle kisses all over your face. “Let her,” he said. “I want you.”

His desire for you never failed to spark the same in response, but you knew it was time to go. The harbormaster had been informed, and the Crest was ready to take off, and you’d sent a message to Omera letting her know to expect you. There would be plenty of time for lovemaking later.

But oh, his kisses were heady, and the promises of what would come if you let him take you to bed called you like a siren’s song. You pulled back from him with some difficulty, giving a soft laugh at his insistence and your own hesitation.

“More later,” you said, giving him one last, consoling kiss. He accepted it gratefully, but his hand still lingered on your waist as you stood from his lap.

“You drive me crazy, woman,” he said affectionately.

Kriff, you wanted to get back in his lap and kiss him silly. You took his helmet in both hands and lowered it onto his head, hoping not being able to see his expression would ease your longing a little.

He looked up at you with that steady, unreadable gaze, and you knew it hadn’t worked. Instead of making you less keen for him, it turned to something different, something that wasn’t hungry for his gentleness so much as his dominance. You almost blushed at the thought.

“What?” he asked, and you could hear his smirk through the modulator. “Oh, love. Did you think the helmet would make it any easier?”

You laughed and shoved his shoulder. “Din.”

He rapped his knuckles over the side of it. “We both know you fell madly in love with this tin can, cyare. Beskar’s the way to your heart.”

You leaned a hand on his shoulder and pressed a kiss to the corner of the T-visor, right over his cheek. “Fine, you got me. Beskar’s the way to my heart.”

He gave a satisfied hum, pleased with your agreement. Though your desire for each other still sparked between you, it settled into a comfortable warmth that would keep until you had more time to enjoy it. You perched into your usual seat and he finally obliged the Crest and eased her into flight, both of you settling in for the trip to Sorgan.

Read chapter six!

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#the long awaited next installment in this series.... i know you've all been dying to read it :)#i hope you like it! the last chapter will be out tomorrow <3 #din djarin x reader #din djarin fanfiction #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian fanfiction #din djarin fluff #maddie writes stuff!#dralshy'a ka'ra

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boogiewrites · 3 years

Text

Burning Star

Chapter 1

Characters: Din Djarin/The Mandalorian / Reader / You

Summary: Din Djarin is a long-time associate and friend. When faced with the truth about the creed he's taken, doubts begin to grow in his mind about his choices. He comes to you, looking for a confidant and he finds more than he bargained for. Begins latter part of S2, porn with plot. A growing romance between two characters that thought of themselves as solitary creatures now wanting to no longer be alone. But with The Mandalorian being who he is, things can never be so simple.

Warnings/Tags: Sexual Content. Dry humping. Confessions of feelings. Hurt/Comfort. Touch Starved.

Click on my icon then go to my Mobile Masterlist in my bio for my other works and chapters. (Had to do this since Tumblr killed links, sorry.) Please like, comment and reblog if you enjoyed it! It helps out us writers A LOT!

You couldn’t recall the exact BBY you’d met The Mandalorian. But then again, you weren’t even sure of your birth year, so dates tended to blend into one another in your memory. You recalled every encounter though, every mission he’d asked you to assist him on, the times you’d healed him and his ship, and especially the time he’d come to your planet for refuge with a strange but endearing little green creature. Your small, backwater planet didn’t have much. But that was one of the main things that had drawn you to it. Your parents were nomads, and you’d adopted the same after their death. So you made yourself a home on a green little planet after years of travel. It homed tiny hubs for weary travelers dotted along with the mountainous surface. But the one they called Mando always came to yours.

You had entertained the idea of becoming a Mandalorian after your parent’s death. They were prospectors, planet-hopping and hoping to make a fortune. On one expedition the Imperials decided the planet you and hundreds of others were on was now theirs for the resources. If you want to call it luck, you did live. You were taken in by an orphanage, one of many overrun with children just like you. You were full of anger and hurt and wanted revenge.

You were caught one night, trying to leave, and a woman fatefully saw you and brought you back in, having the first real heart to heart you’d had in your life. With tears in your eyes, you said you wanted the people who killed your parents, dead. You didn’t see this as unreasonable and you still didn't truthfully. You had read about The Mandalorians and were going to join them you’d told her. You were going to learn to fight and be a warrior and take your revenge. Young and full of rage, this was the only thing that made sense. But this woman, who had been watching you knew better than you did. She saw your softness, that capacity for love and sensitivity, and stopped you.

“Do not let their hate make you hard. It’s what they want. You will act recklessly and in their interests with hate in your heart. The only way to defeat evil is with kindness and love.”

It didn’t make sense at the time and when you were in a heated mood you liked to act like it still didn’t. But she was right.

You had previously spent your days reading and learning, drawing the various landscapes your parents took you too and trying to befriend the local fauna. You were a curious child that grew into a curious adult and you had fought hard to keep that sensitivity the woman told you of. So far, it had served you well.

This didn’t mean you didn’t fight. You had to to survive, but when the opportunity for kindness arose you always gave the other being a chance. But if they betrayed that trust you killed them. It seemed fair when it all came down to it. Philosophically speaking, anyway.

You had settled a store for supplies on a long-abandoned mining planet where a nearly extinct mutated species of Nexu lived in the caves under the planet’s surface. You’d protected them for generations now and they trusted you. But they were deadly to anyone else. There were rumors of the mines not being empty, of treasures left behind because they were too tricky to extract. You knew this wasn’t true. You and your toothy, furry associates had explored every bit of the caves that you could find. But that didn’t stop the desperate from trying. This was unfortunately the root of most of the violence in your life. At least you were protecting others in the meantime.

Maybe that’s what drew your Mandalorian to you. He had taken one way, The Way, and you had taken another. You saw in each other what you could have been. He’d given in to his anger and rage when he was young, and you had learned to see past yours. You had the empathy that came from years of self-reflection and control. You had taken different paths, and you both found what was missing in each other. You had the excitement of helping him on quarry hunts on a handful of occasions and he could hide and mend when needed. It was a balance, much like the force you’d read about, and it fell into place without much effort.

Wasn’t it the way that days that began like any other would lead to things you’d never expected? This day was no different. You had previously been most excited about the stew you’d been brewing for the second day, taking your sweet time with an old recipe you’d found in one of the books one of your neighbors had given you. The term neighbor is used loosely as it would be a day's walk, at the least, to the closest person.

The excitement sparked inside your chest as you went out to greet whoever happened to be landing in the field by your settlement. Then you saw the relic hovering above the broken blades of grass. You hadn’t seen a Razor Crest since his and it was easy to know who was going to come off the ramp when it happened upon your humble patch of the planet. You shield your eyes from the burning sun, close this time of the year as the glint off his Beskar armor sends a shock to your eyes.

It was a relief to see you, he thought. Something familiar, consistent, and warm to come back to after the turbulent journey he’d found himself on with the child.

“Hey, stranger!”You call out loudly, waiting for him to be closer so you didn’t have to shout and scare the foul in the surrounding trees. “I know it’s not repairs bringing you in. Your ship is shining like the Bright Star it’s in such good condition. You been on a vacation or something?”

He knew you were joking, his eyes relaxing under his helmet even though you couldn’t see. “Just got back.” his voice hits your ears, the gritty muffle of mechanical filter making it feel remote. You let him approach you, before reaching to hug him. It was something he’d had to get used to, and something you insisted on. After growing close during your time spent on his ship, the trauma bonding of violence and high stakes forced intimacy between two otherwise solitary creatures. For as long as you spent apart, the time picked up where it started when you came back together. Almost dying is hard work, and saving another from it tends to fasten the bond between people with surprising speed.

You had never shied away from him, he’d never given you a reason to. You approached life with an open heart and only shut it to protect yourself when needed. The contact felt soothing despite his hard outer layers. Both physical and figurative. A wrap of strong arms around his helmet, the weight of someone against him, a slight tug down from the height difference. It all felt very sincere, very human to him. At the moment that’s all he was certain about. The helmet hid the troubled eyes that would’ve given him away, and he found himself thankful for it.

“Always good to see you, Manny.” you give him a good squeeze, a kiss to the helmet that you polish out, cooing up at him with attentiveness. You’d refused to call him Mando any longer after one particularly heinous mission. Calling him something everyone else did, something so generic, didn’t fit. So a pet name it was. He’d never had one before. He secretly preferred it. “This Beskar keeping you safe?” you ask, buffing the spot with your sleeve and then patting his chest plate.

“Yes.” he nods. “Except for all the people trying to kill me for it.” You laugh and pat his hard head.

“Can’t blame them. Stylish... strong... beautiful. Just like you, huh?” you give him a wrinkled nose snort and you hear the grunt of amusement and note the subtle nod.

“What I’m best known for. My looks.”

He spoke with such a monotone delivery that his jokes might’ve not landed to someone more fearful and not as knowledgeable of the Mandalorian's personality under all that flash. “Where’s your little guy?”

No sooner than the words were out of your mouth than a gurgle and chirp from a perfectly him sized sack hanging off his shoulders appeared the little green wrinkly friend. “Always close by. Except when I tell him to be. Then he prefers to wander.”

“This goo ball wouldn’t be bad would you?” he tilts his oversized ears and blinks at his father figure as if he’d brutally insulted him. “Never.” you coo and give him little rubs under his jowls. His eyes shut and he happily soaks up the affection. “C’mon. Let's get inside. I bet you’re hungry.”

“He’s always hungry.” a slightly disgruntled Mando grumbles behind you.

“Sounds like you need to eat too.” you retort, hears his heavy footsteps behind you as you enter the humble building you’d built. It was made from the trees that used to fill the little clearing where the landing pad and accommodations were now. They grew fat and had many low, heavy limbs, perfect for construction. The floor was wooden, the walls a mixture of found metal, clay, and beams, same as the roof which made a lovely sound when it rained and kept the harsh seasons out. Dried flowers and herbs hung from low rafters, all part of the long list of things you did to keep yourself busy. You loved making, and your space reflected that. Despite it not being used by anyone but yourself that often, you kept it clean. Shelves and bins as you entered, a small counter for business off the side, a few small tables and chairs on the other side of the large square space with a small kitchen and refresher through doors on the far wall. It wasn’t much, but you’d made it all and it’d served its purpose thus far.

You sit the child down on a table with a cushion in it, letting his round head reach just over the tabletop. He reaches for the flowers in a bottle while you speak and Mando keeps the child's hand from breaking anything.

“Here you go. Been simmering for two days. Broth, meat, and some herbs and veg from the garden. Doesn’t get better than that little one.” You hand him a tiny spoon you’d carved for his equally tiny hands and he makes a confused sound.

“She made that for you, remember? Be nice, use your manners.” he motions towards it with a nod. You watch the child struggle for a moment before giving up and raise the small bowl.

“That works too.” you grin. “You want some? You could get the broth through that absorption accessory I made you.”

“It was destroyed during a mission recently.”

“Ah.” you nod and purse your lips. “I think I have parts to make another.”

He was used to paying for things being made for him. But you and your hobby of tinkering in a little bit of everything had led to a few things that were one of a kind. You’d made a long device that could fit under his helmet to allow liquids to be consumed without removing his helmet. He thought it was thoughtful but it was purely selfish as you were tired of him not eating your food. Before, you had bartered to eat together in separate rooms so you could get feedback. He wasn’t very good at it. Eating to live was his main purpose of doing it at all, not like you that lived to eat.

“Thank you.” is his quiet reply. There’s an easy silence watching the child burp and gulp and making a mess of himself in the process.

“What brings you in this time? You need me to open up the hut? I’ve still got fuel.”

“I’ll refuel before I leave.” You were used to his pauses, but something felt different, you could feel the consideration for his words churning in the silence. “I came to speak to you about something.”

“I can’t tell if this is good or bad.”

“I’m not sure myself.”

Your brow furrows and you lean across the table to engage him. “In trouble again?”

He is still and quiet for another beat. “I found other Mandalorians.”

Your eyes grow wide, “Oh.” you process the information, your surprise clear on your face, you had never been good at keeping control of your expressions. “Is that... not good?”

“We found a common ground and helped each other. But I feel as if I have more questions than I did before. I was so certain before of my standing within the Mandalore creed. I was raised by it, swore to it. And now...”

“What happened Manny?” you reach across and put your hand over his, the child coos at the action. The child could feel emotions, pick up on non-verbal things others couldn’t, and he knew when you were around, his protector was much happier.

“I come from a segment of Mandalorians that broke away from society. They have very different views of The Way. They told me I belonged to a cult of religious zealots.”

“Wow. They didn’t sugar coat that at all did they?” you pat his hand and try to not come off as condescending about it.

“I was not aware of this. This… difference.” you give him a sympathetic smile even though you aren’t sure if he’s looking at your face.

“What do you mean differences?”

“As soon as I met them they removed their helmets.”

“Oh well, yeah that would…” you nod, “That’s a big difference.”

“Have you read about the Children of the Watch? I know you were fond of reading of Mandalore as a child.” he asks with a touch of warmth to his words, as if it made him proud to say it about you.

‘A bit yes. There’s not much about them out there. They’re very strict and secretive. They didn’t want the progressive Mandalorians corrupting what they saw as the true Way. You all believe in being warriors and protecting what’s yours. The helmet thing seems to be the biggest deal.”

“It’s given me… concerning thoughts.”

“Do you mind if I give my opinion on it?”

“That’s what I came for.” his words made you feel special, like you mattered. They didn’t have the tainted burn of someone that wanted to use you or what you for their gain. He came to you to talk. You were flattered.

You turn your body to face his direction, both hands on top of his large, still armored one that he stared at for a moment while you spoke. Watching your hand's flowery movements to accompany your points broke his concentration on them. “I believe this equates to my discovery that I’m not human.”

His attention is grabbed, head swinging up and the child taking notice.

“I am mostly, but I have Cathar in my bloodline....”

It made sense, he thought, he pieced things together, your angled golden eyes, the large swell of hair you styled in various ways, sometimes wild and free and sometimes braided for more function when fighting. Your nails were long and sharp, your teeth a bit pointed as well, he’d never noticed if you could retract them, he thought you’d styled them in that way. Most importantly he could see the strength your ancestors had instilled in you. Even now. You were fierce, proud, loyal, and passionate. It explained your quick temper for those who harmed others for their selfish benefit. If someone had only glanced at you, human would be the general assumption. But if someone took the time to know you as he had, it was easy to believe there was something else in your blood.

“I grew up with what I assumed were humans, but I’ll never know that now. I could’ve been a foundling for all I know. So I had this loyalty to them, what I thought was a bond, a call to be a part of that. But once I came of age and... things started to appear a bit more complicated I went to someone to see what was wrong with me. Turns out nothing, I’m just not human.” you chuckle and shrug, recalling your awkward memories. “I was then left with the questioning of where my loyalty lies. Who was I? Was I Cathar enough to call myself that? Was I human enough to remain within that species, to live and love and fight with them? I was missing such a large portion of who I was, in my blood, I was someone I’d never known. I had so many things I might’ve missed out on you know? Hunting, hierarchies, mating, having family, a pride. We were known for litters, did I have siblings?” you sigh and you feel the sadness well up as it always did when you ponder the unknowns of your existence. “I digress… what I have concluded, and you may take into consideration is that you are in fact, both. Neither is more or less important. They are born of the same thing, they were once one single unit and all future and past components of Manda. You have your war gods, so do they. You have your morals, your duties, your... Way. Even if you were not a Child of the Watch, if you broke those creeds they specified, you are still a Mandalorian. You are not what you speak after all, you are your actions. Both sects believe neither to be a part of the other, but yet they helped you? You help your fellow Mandalorian. It is only a title, The Way is beyond titles, Manny, you know this.”

“I did not know that about you.” was his response.

“There’s far more we don’t know about our fellow man than we do know.” you smile at him and pat his hand. “You are usually quiet and prefer not to discuss frivolous matters. So I don’t bother you with trivia about myself.”

“I don’t believe that you or your beliefs are frivolous.” He pauses a moment, looking at your hand before placing his on top of yours. Both of his now tentatively trying to comfort yours. He didn’t show physical affection, it wasn’t natural to him. You took notice but kept your eyes on the way his hand gently stroked your own as he tried to elaborate the best he could. “You are... very well-read. An… admirable warrior of high morals. Your ideas have helped me with this. I still have concerns...questions. But for the first time since I learned this I feel… better understood.” You could almost feel the pain of him pulling those words out himself to give to another. This wasn’t his strong suit and you knew it. Was it some of the most endearing conversation you’d ever shared? Yes. Did it make your chest ache just slightly with the sweetness he was presenting even though his eyes were hidden? Also yes. He must be hurting, truly upset, and overwhelmed to try to share the burden of it with someone else.

You look back up to him and hold his hands tightly. “You’re very welcome.” you share a connected moment, eyes to the dark void of his visor as your hands move softly and slowly within the others’. “Would you prefer to continue talking about it? Or would you rather us take one of our walks? I think a break might help clear your head.”

“I think you're right .”

--------------------------------------------------------------

You took the opportunity to carry about the child, stopping to let him feel leaves and touch branches, pinching tiny bites of native fruit for him to experience. It was lovely, the scenery and the company. You kept the conversation light, talking about the books you'd read, the things you’d made, how the local Nexu’s were doing, and what the former guests had been up to. He’d met many of the foundlings that had eventually found their way to you. They had been in the same orphanage as you had. He’d scared most of them, and you couldn’t blame them, but he had always asked how they were when you spoke regardless. The child to him was the first foundling he’d taken in, lived with, cared for, and protected. You had helped with the younger children at the orphanage as you grew up and had taken in a handful over the years. And as children did, they would leave once they felt they were ready or the itch to be free came. You were concerned about how your Mando would take losing his little guy. You could tell they had a strong connection. You walked back both holding one of the outstretched arms of the very slow child, you could see how it was easy to be swept up by the little creature.

You had him care for the child, readying him for bed and getting what was needed out of his ship before locking it down and coming into the small clay and brick temporary home next to yours. It was modest, like yours, built from the clay in the hills you’d gathered yourself and decorated with various stones and tile. It was more than enough compared to what he was used to. A small room for the child to sleep, tucked away safe and cozy and you once again held the father figure and wished him a goodnight up against the cool metal of his helmet. He thanks you for your help, as he always does.

You tell him not to mention it, he’d do the same for you, as you always did. The parting goodbyes were always rather special and tender to you. He would tell you he hoped you found yourself in the favor of the maker, to be safe, vigilant, and that he would see you again. He’d always kept his promise.

---------

Going without sleep wasn’t something new for him. So sitting in the light of one of the four moons in the sky wasn’t exactly unexpected when you saw it from the dark interior of your home. He knew you were there. He had detected the movement in the building with his helmet without even looking in your direction. He sat on the stone stoop outside, helmet slowly shifting between looking down to the dirt path in front of him and up into the bright sky. It was the only glint off him from the moonlight, he was without his usual covering of Beskar armor on the rest of his body. He was in his black fabric shirt and pants, odd to see him without the visual breaks the shapes of his armor made. He still had his boots and his helmet on. You had yet to see him without them. You put on a robe to cover yourself in your summer-light sleeping shift and decided to see if you can be of any help.

He couldn’t decide if he was relieved or more anxious at the sight of you. He felt naked suddenly, despite all of his body being covered except his hands. He became hyper-aware of the small patch of skin around his neck that was uncovered, the wind tickling and reminding him he was in his most exposed state around someone in decades. You looked soft as you take slow steps towards him across the grassy garden between the buildings. It wasn’t just your loose hair, the free, flowing fabric showing skin he didn’t recall seeing before. The glow of the moon lent him to think he could see the energy around you as you approached and it bounced off your skin. But unlike The Way he was taught, he didn’t think less of you for appearing delicate. He knew better, but it seemed to help make him feel more at ease in his state of what he would call undress.

“Hey Manny.” your voice was considerate like a mother's and full of affection he didn’t feel he deserved. “Would you like some company?” you ask, tilting your head and holding out a small cup of cold liquid down to him. “Brought tea.” you mumble before moving to stand near him, the edges of your robes reaching out to caress the shaft of his boot on occasion.

With his head low, shielding his chin from your view he takes a sip. At this point in his inner monologue, he didn’t have it in him to ask you to turn away while he drank, hiding in the shadows was good enough.

“Put the kid to bed but you forgot to put yourself down too?” you give him a sleepy smile. You hear a long exhale from the filter in his helmet. “Still too much going on in your head to sleep, huh?” you say with a nod, already knowing. You sit your cup on the corner of the small stone landing in front of the door. You kneel before him, settling in and studying him dutifully. You’d never seen him look so vulnerable before, and you were mixed on your decision about how to approach him.

“Yeah. Still too much.”

“I’m all ears if you want to spill.” you offer with upward palms.

“I don’t want to keep you up. You should go back to bed. You were resting before you saw me.”

“And now I won’t be able to go back to sleep until I know you’re okay.”

A small grunt of acceptance comes from the helmet. “I feel angry and it confuses me. I shouldn’t be angry. I’ve made my decisions. Most a long time ago. But I am. I’m trying to practice humility, acceptance. But there’s only anger and this feeling of being betrayed.”

“That sounds normal to me.” you nod in support, thankful he was finally sharing with you what was going on in his mind. You’d had glances inside before, stories he’d told, where his morals lie, but this felt different. “They did help you. Maybe it’s good to focus on that?”

“I’m not angry at them.”

Your brow shows your confusion.

“I’m angry at the Children of the Watch.”

That was different. You understood him being angry at those that called him a zealot and dismissed his beliefs. Despite them being so similar.

“No matter how small of a part of my creed may have been a lie. It was still a lie. Now I wonder what else was a lie. None of it? All of it? I’ve given my life to this.”

“It’s not... simple.” you offer gently, eyes to the ground, not wanting to antagonize him.

“No. It’s not.” you let him think, studying his bare hands. It gave you plenty to do in the downtime. You’d seen bits of him before when healing him, but you couldn’t recall if you’d seen his hands. The warm brown skin was marked with light and dark scars alike from the years of abuse his body had taken. They were bigger than yours, more square and sturdy in comparison. “The things I’ve sacrificed for a lie.” it was almost a hiss, and you feel the burn of it in your chest for him.

“I know it’s not my apology to give,” you say quietly, rising on your knees to touch his forearms, suddenly aware of the softness and warmth underneath your hands as you touched him. There were no bracers to block you or worry about activating, there was just a man under there after all. “But I am sorry about how much this is upsetting you.”

“You are never a source of upset, Jaira.” Your name came off his lips like a whisper. He had so seldom used it. He wanted to reach out and touch your hands, but the thought of skin against his made him more agitated in multiple ways, both good and bad. Your expressive face told him you had known this but thanked him for the kind words all the same.

“Nor you to me, Manny.” you said his name in the same tender way, making it feel almost vulgar as you rest so close together.

He looks away, you can see the gears shifting from his subtle body language. “I believe it’s long overdue… in the interest of exploring the things I’ve sacrificed... you’ve earned my real name.” Your eyes go large, a quick jerk upward as he moves, bravely so, to place his hand over yours. His skin felt as hot as the sun. “My name is Din. Din Djarin.”

“Din.” you say with an unintentionally sickeningly sweet sigh of revelation. You give a smile that grows larger slowly, feeling it reach up into your eyes. “Din. That’s such a… gentle name. I like it.” you insist with a nudge forward of your chin.

“Yours reminds me of a phrase we have in Mandoa.” he looks down, now preoccupied with his decision to touch your hand. It was so giving, warm, and feeling distinctly feminine when paired with his.

“What’s that?”

“I think it would translate best to luck… destiny. Bright stars that light the good course to take.”

Your eyes went wide like a forest animal. You couldn’t help it, it was one of the sweetest sentiments anyone had ever given you. “Say it for me, Din.”

He felt his chest jerk at the word. He wasn’t used to being affected by them. Certainly not his name. “Jate’kara.”

“I’ve not been able to find much about your language. Would you be willing to teach me someday?”

“Of course.” he sounded borderline offended at your statement.

“Did I say something wrong?” you ask with a tilt of your head.

“No, no.” he shakes his head. “You don’t have to ask things of me like they’re favors.” he clarifies. “Whatever you need of me...I’ll do it.”

It sent a flip to your insides. This felt like a lot of responsibility. You could just... request things from this myth-worthy Mandalorian? It was an odd power rush you weren’t truly capable of dealing with in this rather intimate setting. You were close, almost between his knees, hands clasped together and speaking quietly into the warm night air. The condensation ran cool on your skin, the wind leaving bumps over your skin in its wake. The buzz of animals and insects was loud but faded when you were so close and so deep in conversation. If he said you could ask anything of him. Then perhaps you would. Why sit on the intensity of the moment? Strike.

“What is it that is bothering you? You feel... different. Not angry. I’ve seen you angry this is more subtle more...deep. I feel like you’re holding back. What is it that's making you so angry? You are so logical and reasonable in your approach to things. What is it that's so distressing you can't sleep?”

He takes a deep breath. He hasn’t wanted to say and be thought of as simple or even crude. But you'd asked and he was left with no excuse. “There are things that men want...even need that arent considered with The Way. I am a Mandalorian. But I am also a man. I've given so much of myself to being Mandalorian that I've had to deny myself things that are a part of that human side of me.”

“And with learning of the lies, you’re angry because you feel like you've been suffering for no reason.”

“Yes.” a stern answer and a strong nod to accompany it.

You almost lost your nerve, but with the way his thumb kept sweeping across your skin and the voltage it felt like it created with every touch you would’ve cursed yourself if you didn’t ask. “What have you sacrificed unwillingly, Din?”

Your eyes gave you away if your tone hadn’t. His helmet doesn’t move, he is as still as stone, gray, and shining like a polished river rock as he bores into you. “That is a bold question.”

“You have given me bold answers. I return the earnestness with the things I want to know.”

“You want to know these things?”

“I want to know you.” a direct answer and a slight leaning forward to keep him close as if he might run away in fear. Which was the most ridiculous imagery you could imagine. “I always have. I’ve been witness to your good and the bad actions. I’d like to be a bearer of your thoughts tool. I can’t help but want to understand what makes you, you. Of all the creatures and people I’ve met, you are the only one to hold my attention so completely both with and without his presence.”

Your words made for the most interesting combination of occurrences in his chest and stomach. It was fire and ice, a pull to the man in him, and a calling of praise for the life he led. His cheeks burned, a rare occurrence. It had all been a fantasy before now. But you with your fond words and their heated meanings were making them feel more real by the second.

“You do know how to appeal to both sides of me that I’m talking about.” he pauses and observes your face a moment, and no sign of retreat is within your eyes. “There's been no place for the… physical intimacy that men can crave. I am not one to pay, and I don't have the time to put into such efforts that I believe are needed for such… intimate things. They’re as sacred as an oath. I might've not acted that way when I was young. But clarity is gained with experience.”

“I share the sentiment.” a touch of sadness he understood well was in your eyes and it made his chest ache. A being like you shouldn’t know these feelings. A flash of anger lit within him for the injustice in a universe where a woman like you would ever feel lonely in such a way.

“You’ve taken no oath to hold you back from such things.”

“But I have not had the time, place, or person to swear such sacred oaths.” you give a subdued laugh, throwing his words back at him. “Or… at least I didn’t think I did… because I wasn’t sure if they could.” you look away and he sees it. You meant him.

“They can,” he answers, a deep fearless voice emanates from the helmet that holds your entire body at attention. “There are… obstacles to overcome. But they can.”

With a rush of confidence, you move closer, your chest against his legs and your hands on his knees. “Do you know of any obstacle I have yet to overcome?” a smirk that catches him off guard appears, a playfulness to your eyes bright and doting on him makes him catch the fever you were trying to spread.

“No.” a breathy answer through Beskar.

“Then let me help.” you offer. “I have grown so fond of you over these years. I wasn’t convinced you felt the same.”

“I do.”

“We can approach this issue together and… overcome it the same. As we have before.”

“As we will again.” He recites part of the toast you liked to give before leaving on missions. He remembered it. He did care.

“What obstacles are there? You know you have my silence with such things.”

Where did he even begin? He didn’t feel prepared and ironically he was unprepared for such actions to take place and feelings to be felt. “I know. I trust you.” There was nothing but the truth in his words and you reach to put your hand to the side of his helmet as if it were his cheek. You had always accepted this part of him, treating the helmet as if it WAS him and not an external thing. Which is how he thought of it most of the time. There was never a wish for him to remove it or invasive questions. You were knowledgeable about the Mandalorians and knew their armor was sacred to them, and you assumed as such about this man and his helmet. He places his hand over yours, the warmth between them registering on his helmet display and building condensation on its surface. “Let’s go inside.” he instructs, taking your hands, a flush of warmth through his bones at the touch of another.

“Is the child-?”

“Fast asleep.” he quickly answers, leading you to the small bedroom in the earthen home.

He stands at the long side of the bed for a moment, hand in yours and trying to get his bearings, it had been so long since he’d done anything like this. You saw his head moving and taking in the room and then you and back again, you could sense the uncertainty. “Din, relax.” a warm smile comes across your face, taking the lead, and that was fine with you. You almost coo his name, your hands moving to his upper arms to rub them reassuringly.

“Hard when it’s been so long.” he regrets it as he says it, thinking it might sound a bit pathetic.

“Believe me it’s been a very long time for me too.” you console him, standing chest to chest to start. You follow the hills and valleys of his arms, strong and lean under the pliant fabric to his bare hands, lacing your fingers together, feeling him hide the twitches and jerks from the sensation of touch. “Sit down on the bed. Let me get close to you.” he sits down, sat up far too straight. “Put the bend of your knees against the bed... there we go.” he feels your hands on his thighs and an audible gulp hits your ears that you ignore. “You know I’m not going to judge you. I want this… I want you too.” He feels you close the space between you, your legs sliding between his naturally wide splayed ones. “Now tell me what obstacles did you mean before? Talk to me and let me know what you need.” your hands trace the dark lines on his helmet and a shiver runs down his back.

You were being far better about this than he warranted. It made him want you more, a hunger in his lower stomach slowly growing past his anxiety. “Helmet stays on.” was his first thought, spoken almost too quickly.

“Of course.” you keep your voice quiet and soothing, hands making their trek up and down his arms, waiting to feel them lose their tension. “Do you have to leave everything else on?” you coax him with a squeeze to his biceps, putting one leg up, now visible from beneath your robe over his.

You can’t see it but you get an actual grin out of him. “No.” a more confident response, feeling more relaxed with your unintentional playful humor. You see him look down to see the bare skin, the touchless friction between your bodies growing hotter by the second.“But let’s not get carried away.”

You hear the laugh this time, he sees your expression shift, a triumphant smile for getting him out of his own head. “I know I can be sensitive when I’ve not... been touched in a long time.”

“Yeah?” he liked the sounds of you talking about it a little too much. He wanted to hear anything you’d tell him about your body.

“Yeah.” your breath catches, “Are you?”

He nods, he didn’t have the confidence in this area yet to own what he saw as shortcomings.

“I want to sit in your lap. Can I?” You wanted to take it slow. The last thing you wanted was to scare him off. There is a fine line between indulgence and going too far when it came to dealing with a man like him.

“Yes.” another quick nod, and you are happy to give in, your hips settle well on his strong thighs, feeling secure. To him, it felt it took forever and didn’t last long enough. The drag of your bare skin against his thin clothes was a lot. The weight of what felt like a lifetime of neglect to himself and his needs weighs as heavy on him as you do. He had known touch only through violence for decades now, the tenderness you were offering him willingly was almost overwhelming. He was taught the ways of war and violence since he was young. The ways of more fragile things; of love and intimacy he’d had to learn on his own.

“I’ll go slow.” Slow was the opposite of how your hearts were beating. Your fingers wanted to touch that strip of skin unveiled around his shirt collar, but you only stared at it for the moment. His head pauses just above your chest, your arms resting on his shoulders, fingers light on the edge of his helmet and hungry to move farther down.

“Thank you.” a simple but honest answer.

You’d been close before, seen large spaces of bare skin and carried one another, slept shoved into a single space too small for you both but it had never felt like this. Everywhere your bodies met was warm and giving, both now very aware of the gap between both your hips in this position. You took the time to study him up close, the metal of his helmet was unbelievably smooth as your fingers traced invisible lines and doted on the hard surface separating you from him. Did you want his helmet off? Yes. You wanted to know, to be the only one to know, to touch and feel and savor every inch of him. The more you thought about it, the closer you got to him, the harder it was to recall a time you didn’t think of him this way. Repressing your wants and needs was something you were both personally familiar with.

“It doesn’t bother you when I touch your helmet like this does it?”

“N-no. I like it.” his face a melted mess under the guard. He watched you so close, your bright eyes glowing with the light the moon beaming down. He couldn’t feel it, but he knew everywhere you touched, spots lighting up red with heat, pulsing where more pressure was applied. It was a good introduction to being touched again. You push forward, a single kiss to where you believed his cheek to be. When you pulled away, he answered before you could ask. “Go on.” a heated hiss through the filter deep and dark and heavy as it hit your ears. You place another to the other side, tilting his head you give him another to his forehead. His eyes would close when you were near, a happy sigh, a weighted exhale is let out, feeling his shoulders slumping with each dot of affection. You hold his metal cheeks, a faint kiss to the tinted part of his visor. You press your forehead against his, barely a measurement worth noting separating you as he gives in to your touch, wanting to fall into you, to give you back what you were giving him.

You move your hands slowly, giving him time to register and adapt before moving on, your arms wrap around his helmet, holding him close before leaving a trail of smaller kisses behind, bringing his head only slightly down into your chest. Underneath he was a slack-jawed puddle. Your arms made their way down his shoulders to his back, you could even feel the raised skin of scars you’d helped suture, fingertips light along them, exploring new ones. After your flat palms explored his back, finding his breathing steady and deep you tried something new. A drag of your nails against the fabric drew a deep groan from him. “Good?”

“Ung-” a deep enthusiastic grunt escapes the helmet pushed to your collarbone. “Yes.” You continue, you scratch his back and he swears he could cry at the sensation. You didn’t move away or avoid his scars, the patchwork he felt his body looked like. You embraced it, all of him, and it was hitting him harder than he expected it to.

You take a deep breath, another kiss to soothe to the cold metal. “Do you want to...see me? Or- touch me back?”

He hadn’t even thought about it, his brain hadn’t moved past the feel-good moments you were covering him in.

“Yes.” a simple but hungry answer. As you see his helmet tilt downward towards your chest.

“I want you to too.” Your sincere tone struck him, he watched your agile fingers reach for the belt that held your robe in place. It fell silent, blood in your ears as it was your turn to feel the taste of nervousness on your tongue. Your body was something that did things for you, it wasn’t something you often stopped to consider the aesthetic of. The quiet noises that he let escape as you took off the robe left any hesitation behind with it as it laid on the floor abandoned. His hands didn’t move, his chest did noticeably, as yours mirrored, picking up speed as you moved forward. You take one of his hands, thumbs rubbing circles, leaving small kisses on his fingertips as the sounds beneath the Beskar grew louder. The rhythm of his breathing was now audible, helpless sounds you never expected to hear from anything but pain brushed against your ears and touched you in places no one had in ages. You kiss him palm, nose nuzzled into the only slightly trembling fingers. After you felt the skin-to-skin contact was enough to calibrate him, you meet what you felt to be his eyes, taking his hand and placing it over your breast. You were still covered with the thin sleep shift but it was made for breathability in the heat of summer and didn’t leave much to the imagination. You take him by the wrist of the awkwardly avoidant hand and put it on the curve of your hip. “Is this-?”

“Yes.” he rushes out and sees you smile, causing another kiss to be given to his helmet where you were aiming for what would be his mouth. He groaned, feeling your nipple harden against his palm, the other feeling the silky slip of fabric as he let himself give a firm grip to your fleshiest parts.

“Go on, Din,” you whisper into his visor. “Touch me,” you ask of him. A strangled noise breaking through bitten lips is your answer. You place your hand gently on top of his, showing him it was okay, reminding him how to, helping him give in. Your hand forces his to cup the weight of your chest, the exhale of pleasure fogged up his visor as you had your head rested against his. “Like that, yeah.” you wet your lips and his hand begins to move on its own. Soon his hands are kneading at you, a simple brush of thumb over your nipple forces an inhale he drinks up the sound of.

He fondly recalled this now, that static in the air, the shared breaths and the power he felt with a woman in his grip. He relaxes his head against the bend of your neck, mouth open and watering, hidden from view but the sound of his breathing was enough to tell you he was giving over to it now. The tentativeness leaves, his hand pulls your hips closer to him, both inhaling at the feeling of touch against the places your arousal was spreading from. You let out a small whine at the feeling of the seam of his pants, pressed against by his growing erection.

“Fuck.” you hear exhaled into your shoulder and you shudder. “You feel...so good.” his hand grips you firmly, “Like velvet in my hands…” his lips brush against his helmet and he wishes it was your skin. He was famished for touch, for this connection and lust he’d repressed for so long. But here it was, in his hands, in his lap asking him for more. His hands ran up your bare chest, feeling the pulse under your skin and the slick your sweat had created. “You’re as hot as a star under my hands.” he groans.

You audibly swoon at the comment, feeling that distinct masculine roughness of well-worked hands as his palms moved into your hairline. “And you’re as hard as Beskar under me.” You move your hips, a grind against his, and a fully formed moan escapes, neck going limp and the heaviness of the helmet resting on your shoulder now. You whine, the friction feeling even more delicious against your glossy wet center. He encourages you wordlessly, a hand on your ass to keep a slow rhythm, a painful drag of your engorged clit against the perfectly fit shaft of his cock. Such a thin piece of material between you, you thought. You reach between your legs, a wet mess on both of you and it’s no surprise. “I’m as wet as Kamino, Din.” you hum and smile, the front of his helmet against your neck again. You feel the vibration of his groan against your skin. “Look what you’re doing to me,” you whisper, mouth pressed against his helmet where his ear would be. He sees the light hit your fingers as you raise them. “See that?”

“Fuck...yes little star I do.” he groaned heavily, his chest heaving a bit. You get bolder, your hand moving from your lips to the painfully hard throb in his pants. Another long groan, a jerk of his hips as you palm him, a back and forth against the pressure, feeling him jump against the confines. “Unf - I - I won’t- “ his hips jerk and his hand moved faster than you can register to your wrist. A firm hold that makes you moan and stop. There was that strength you had wanted to be obedient to. “That might be a bit… much for me.” He stopped you out of fear of not being able to stop. He didn’t want to scare you, unleash something he wasn’t ready for or couldn’t control. It was a concern he’d cum too soon and embarrass himself, this wasn’t something he could just jump back into and impress anyone.

He was thankful you weren’t disappointed, “Do you want me to make you cum, Din?” Every time you said his name with such lust in your voice it made him moan. But he didn’t feel the least bit weak for it.

“I wanted us both to...enjoy this.”

“If you think I’m not enjoying myself you’re welcome to put that hand between my legs and find the contrary.” Another moan that makes him slump comes heavily from him. “If you do want to...enjoy this…” you let out a small breathy laugh he raises his head to. “I can arrange that.” you offer, your nose gliding affectionately against the center indent of his helmet. “Relax and enjoy this with me, Din.” you give him a reassuring smile, lining your hips up again. You grind back and forth, his hands finding their place on your body quickly. You straighten your back to give him a view of you, and you finally let your fingers dive under the neck of his shirt, feeling the slightest glimpse of hair at the base of his neck, your fingers go as far into his helmet as they can. You start that back and forth against him, over and over, lazy growing more urgent as each time he gives a harsh drag across your clit, the stimulation you needed. “I’ve thought about you like this, you know.”

A small “Ungff.” was the only response he could manage.

“Wanted my hands to feel your skin, just for pleasure. Wanted to know how you’d feel... thick and throbbing beneath me like this.”

With a deep grunt, his hand holds your hip sternly, the other moving to the back of your head, pressing your forehead to his. “Yes-keep talking like that, fuck.” The demand was thick in his voice, his hands no longer gentle, giving away the need they were trying to find an outlet for.

“You’ve turned me into something I’m not for anyone else. Some needy young girl, hungry for a taste of flash and flesh with a man.”

“You’re so, fuck you’re so soft.” he moans, helmet pushing back against you like a bull, and you were happy to ride. "Your so good at that."

You let it build, focusing on the feeling between your legs, you let your breathing take over, every grind a release of sound, and a step climbed together towards your peak. “I knew you would be impressive. You had to be. Look at you.” You pant and you feel his fingers sink into your hair, a fistful slowly tightening as you held onto his back and head, leveraging and letting your hips do all the work. “No man’s ever made me such a greedy woman with only his hands before Din. No one. Only you.” The filter slips and your mouth falls open, breath fast from exertion, both sets of hands now with a white-knuckled grip against each other's bodies.

It was hot and fast and what you needed to satiate your needs. His hands and sounds told you everything you need to know for now. He wanted you, needed you, craved you. He was giving you the power to make him weak, a rush to your head that wasn’t just your impending orgasm.

“Fuck Din I’m close.” you admit, your mouth open and panting, tongue shamelessly lapping at his helmet, your lips kissing him as if he could kiss back. Once again, he returned the kisses with his hands, switching grip one went to your back, the other back to your breasts bouncing out of their thin confines.

“Fucking do it.” he bites out through gritted teeth, fingers tugging your top down to expose you and give your nipple a pinch.

“Mmmph!” a slight whine but a plea for more. “Yes fuck I love that Din, harder.” your words rush out and he eagerly follows.

“Cum for me. Cum on me. Please.” he growls, and it ignites something in you. Something primal. “C’mon little star, fuckin burn for me.” he commands, a barked order, caught up in it all, the heat, the friction, and the haze of lust around you both he cums. Unexpectedly but it didn’t matter at this point. With that solid thrust against you, a hand gripped into the flesh between your shoulder blades, the masculine energy you’d craved washes over you in the grunts and expletives that leak from the helmet.

“Yes, fucking cum Din. Give it to me.” you moan shamelessly, head falling back. A yip of “Yes.” building from whines to full roars overcomes you as you do as he asks and explode into a white bright hot light that consumes you. You try to keep the pace, the contact but your body stutters and begins to shake. The now warm metal of his helmet presses between your bouncing tits as your head tilts back and he holds you up with both hands, you never felt fear of falling when his hands were on you. At least not falling into the floor.

It was as if his mind cleared, and he was left soaking in this gleaming woman cumming hard in his arms. He held you up, seeing your chest heave, the pink flushing your skin, how much desire he felt in his growled name as you gnashed your teeth and came on him.

Fuck he felt good.

He got to scoop you up, a trembling and panting shadow of the primal goddess you’d just been, arms wrapping around your waist, one hand moving to see your face as it fought to regain its bearings.

"You glow like a star when you're like this." He isn't sure if he's overstepped, he doesn't know if the shine in your eyes is from the recent orgasm or his words. “Fuck you are… beautiful. You know that?” your mass of hair falls forward as you look down at him, chest still finding its normal pace.

Your eyes blink, a flutter of disbelief and, if he read you correctly, a slice of fear for only a second. “Beautiful?” you ask, feeling a bit bewildered.

His hand stops its gentle stroking against your hair and face. “You act like you’ve never been called that before.” You can feel the subtle laugh in his chest when he says it.

When your face remains still for a moment, eyes bright and full of memories he wishes he could access you reply almost sheepishly, “I've not.”

With the simple, quiet answer he was given more information about you than you knew you'd given up. You'd never let anyone in like this before. No one had ever held you and told you the things you longed to hear from another you cared for. You were like him after all.

With a light hand, you rest against his helmet again, stroking it as if it were his hair. "It means more coming from you than it would anyone else."

Now you've taken his words from him. You managed to make him feel special. Something he had denied his entire life. Something he wasn't sure he even believed anyone could be. In the same sentiment as your confession, he was glad it was you that was changing his changing his mind about such things. Learning the truth about the Children of the Watch, and the questions it brought up about his life was the first in a wave of realizations he'd face. Perhaps it was time to reevaluate how he lived his life if it meant missing out on things like you.

I tagged those who wanted in my Javi fic and interacted with my posts about making this fic. If you want to be added or removed just let me know.

@jaegeeeeer @likedovesinthewnd @inkededucatednnerdy @biharryjames @ladamari68 @past-romantic @weliketomoveit @shikin83 @ookamikuro @anglovesthis @swol-bear @louist91syndrome @guiltylitpleasures @nfnoofiii @hellothefriend @beatha-dubhach @l-e-i-n-t-h @firehart9

#the mandalorian reader #the mandalorian x you #din djarin reader #din djarin fic #the mandalorian fic

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