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janaispunk · 4 months

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it’s nice to have a friend

this is a secret santa gift for @wethairjoel - merry christmas my love 🫶🏻

pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

word count: ~2.6k

summary: Joel and you have been best friends for years, but maybe this Christmas it’s time for the both of you to admit that that’s not all you want. (Goddamn I should write Hallmark movies)

tags: no outbreak!AU, friends to lovers, idiots in love, Sarah is alive, Ellie is reader’s sister, able-bodied reader, bits of angst/jealousy, Joel being emotionally constipated, mentions of alcohol consumption, FLUFF <3

dividers by @/saradika-graphics who is amazing!

full masterlist here / follow @janaispunknotifs and turn on notifications for fic updates!

much love to @reddedmiller for assuring me that this is cute and not terrible, i love you 🫶🏻

“Ellie, come on! They’re here!”

Your back is turned to the door as you’re yelling up the staircase, waiting for your younger sister to finally come down. You turn around, fixing the open door and your waiting friend Joel with a tired smile.

“Hi,” you sigh, waving at Sarah, who’s waiting in the backseat of Joel’s truck.

“Rough morning?” Joel chuckles and lets you pull him into a quick hug.

As you’re nodding, Ellie finally comes trudging down the stairs, her backpack haphazardly thrown over one shoulder and her hair in a loose ponytail. She wordlessly flips you the bird as she walks past you and you roll your eyes, used to her grumpy mood in the morning.

“Sorry,” you mutter in Joel’s direction, ushering her out of the door, “didn’t mean to make you guys late.”

Joel laughs and shakes his head. “Don’t worry about it, darlin’, it’s no big deal.”

He casually throws an arm over your shoulder as he leads you to his car and opens the passenger side’s door for you while Ellie is already climbing in beside Sarah.

Joel starts the car and makes his way to the girls’ school, the radio playing soft rock music in the background and the girls chattering away behind you.

“Thanks again for doing this,” you smile at Joel.

“‘Course. You’re the one doin’ me a favor here, really.”

Joel and you had both agreed to take the day off and go shopping for Christmas presents for your girls while they were at school.

You had moved to Austin two years ago, a few months after becoming Ellie’s legal guardian. Ellie and Sarah had classes together and had quickly become best friends, easing your worries about Ellie being an outsider at her new school, and they asked to spend more time together outside of classes almost constantly.

That’s how you met Joel, the both of you bonding over being the sole caregiver for your girls and being younger than most other parents at the school. It’s an easy friendship and one that you cherish greatly. Joel is a good friend, making you laugh when you’re with him, always willing to help if anything at your house needs fixing, hosting barbecues for the four almost every weekend in the summer, and someone you can always turn to for parenting advice.

So what if he’s also so handsome that it almost hurts to look at him sometimes and your heart rate still picks up when he’s close to you? When you had first started hanging out more, you had thought that there might be more between you, with the way he kept calling you “darlin’” and the flirty remarks he threw at you, but nothing more ever happened and he never gave you any indication that he wanted anything more, so you figured that it was just his southern charm and that he treated everybody like this. Not wanting to screw up the one real friendship that you had managed to build in your new hometown, you continued to swallow down any deeper feelings, any attraction that you might feel towards him.

You drop the girls off at school and continue the drive downtown, stopping on the way for a coffee. Joel, who you have never seen drinking anything else than plain black coffee, teases you relentlessly over the Christmas themed drink with syrup and an obnoxious amount of whipped cream that you have picked for yourself. It’s a never ending discussion that comes up every time you have coffee together and one that you've gotten used to, with Joel not understanding why you would taint the coffee’s taste and you not understanding how he’s able to drink the bitter beverage without smoothing it out with milk at least.

When you finally reach the mall, already packed with bustling crowds of Christmas shoppers, you sigh. At least you’re not alone, and you have a plan of what you want to get. You pull out the list of potential gifts and stores where you might get them that you had written the night before, making Joel chuckle.

“Always prepared for anythin’, huh?”

You grin back and nudge him with your elbow. “You’re gonna thank me later, trust me.”

“Don’t doubt it,” he mutters and follows you through the crowd of people, a calming presence by your side.

You make a good team, somehow both more equipped to pick out presents for the other’s young girl. Sarah had wished for new CDs, movies and posters of her favorite bands to redecorate her room, an endeavor that you’re more than happy to help with. Ellie wants new strings and picks for her guitar, one that you had bought second hand and that Joel is teaching her to play almost every weekend, and new drawing utensils.

Due to your thorough planning, you manage to secure all the goods before noon, a fact that you don’t hesitate to rub into Joel’s face and he reluctantly agrees that this shopping trip had been done much faster than if he had gone alone, playing up his grumpy demeanor but you know him well enough to see the warm and playful glint in his eyes.

Since you still have a few hours to yourselves until the girls will return from school, you decide to get another coffee and maybe a snack together, this time actually sitting down in a café rather than picking it up. You’re treating yourself to another fancy drink, Joel is sipping on another black coffee and you’re sharing a blueberry muffin while you’re talking about your plans for the holidays.

Ellie and you will be over at the Millers for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, a tradition that you had established last year and that you’re more than grateful for. You love Ellie and she’s the only family that you care about, but you want her to have the best time possible, especially at Christmas.

Joel excuses himself to use the bathroom and leaves you alone at the table. You’re aimlessly scrolling through your phone when another person sits down in Joel’s seat. You look up slowly, taking in the guy in front of you. Slim, blonde, about your age, kind of handsome, you presume, if that part of your mind wasn’t taken up by another man. But that’s not a thought that you’re supposed to have, you try reminding yourself.

“Hey,” the man says, smiling at you. He has a handsome smile, too. “I’m Dan.” He extends a hand to you and you shake it, too perplexed to do much else.

“I’m sorry to disturb you, I just came in and saw you sitting here all alone and I just thought I’d take the chance and ask if you wanted to go out with me sometime?”

You stare at him for a second, the question barely registering in your brain, before you snap out of it. Why not, you tell yourself, this might be good for you. Good to get the idea of Joel and you out of your head once and for all.

“I- um, yeah. Sure!”

You plaster a smile on your face and exchange phone numbers with Dan who promises to text you and gets up just as Joel comes back, scowling at Dan’s retreating back.

“Who was that?” he asks, and you wonder if you’re imagining his tone being colder than it was before he left.

“Just a guy,” you murmur, feeling embarrassed and weirdly guilty, “wanted to go out with me, I guess.”

“And, will you?” You’re not imagining it, Joel definitely sounds colder.

“Maybe. I don’t know. Who knows if he’ll even text me,” you shrug and stand up abruptly, suddenly desperate to get out of the situation, “let’s go.”

Joel’s answering huff doesn’t do much to calm you down and the walk back to the car is more silent than you’re used to with him, none of the usual bantering between you two.

He drops you off at your house and while you had planned to invite him in to maybe start wrapping your gifts together, you’re now kind of desperate to get out of this weird tension between you, so you just grab your bags and hop out of the truck. Joel mumbles his goodbye and you watch him drive off while you’re standing in your doorway, your eyebrows furrowed. You think that maybe something just soured his mood, even if you can’t fathom what it might have been, and calm yourself with the thought that you’ll just text him later.

You do just that, sending him a photo of your wrapped gifts a few hours after you got home, but he doesn’t respond. You don’t hear from him for several days, your calls remaining unanswered and there are no replies to your texts. You actually resort to asking Ellie if Sarah has said anything, but she’s just as clueless as you are.

The weekend rolls around and you go on your date with Dan, who, unlike someone else, has texted you. He takes you out for lunch and while the date is nice and he’s being polite, easy to have a conversation with and you’re fighting with yourself trying to like him, you’re bored.

You don’t feel any spark between the two of you, a spark that you, as you begrudgingly have to admit to yourself, always feel when you’re with Joel. You decidedly swallow that thought back down as soon as it occurs to you, but it stays in the back of your mind, like a kind of craving that you just can’t turn off.

You tell Dan that you’re sorry but that you don’t see the two of you turn into anything more, which he accepts graciously and wishes you all the best and you once again want to kick yourself for not feeling anything at all for this kind and blissfully uncomplicated man.

Grinding your teeth, you call Joel the next evening and to your surprise, he finally picks up.

“Where the hell have you been?” you demand without as much as a greeting.

“Just busy with work,” his voice huffs through the speaker and you can’t help but start feeling slightly more at ease at the sound of it, even if you don’t believe that he was too busy to contact you for days, but at least he picked up your call now.

“How’d your date go?”

He sounds… careful, like he’s not sure if he wants to know the answer. You’re confused for a second; you didn’t even have the chance to tell him about those plans; until your gaze falls on your sister who’s sitting on the couch opposite from you with headphones over her ears and frantically scribbling in her notebook.

“Between Sarah and Ellie, no secret is safe, huh?” you grin.

“So it’s a secret?” His voice is tense.

“I guess not, I just didn’t- I don’t know.” You huff a frustrated sigh. “But it doesn’t matter, I’m not gonna see him again, so…”

“Did he do something?” Joel demands immediately and you feel your cheeks warming at the way he switches into protective mode.

“No no, don’t get all riled up. He was nice, just… not it. I wasn’t really interested in him anyway, so.”

“Huh,” Joel mumbles and though you can’t see him, you can tell that some of the tension is dissolving.

You chat a little more, working out the finer parts of the plans for your shared Christmas celebration in a few days, and by the end of the phone call, you feel like things between you are back to normal.

It’s the second Christmas Eve that you’ve spent at the Miller household and it’s just as chaotic as the first one. Joel’s brother Tommy comes to visit, bringing with him a bottle of whiskey and an air of mischief that immediately infects the two girls who are already giddy with the energy of Christmas, the prospect of getting presents tomorrow morning and the inevitable sugar high that comes with consuming mountains of Christmas cookies.

Ellie and you are meant to sleep over, Ellie in Sarah’s room and you in the guest room, so you indulge in a few glasses of whiskey, feeling pleasantly tipsy and like a warm, hazy glow is surrounding you. You sing Christmas songs along to the radio with the girls, laugh loudly at Tommy’s crude jokes and even get Joel, who is slightly drunk himself, to dance with you for a few minutes.

When you finally retreat to the kitchen to get yourself a glass of water, you somehow already sense Joel’s presence behind you before he speaks up.

“Hey,” he murmurs as you turn around, his gaze trained on the floor at your feet.

“Hey,” you echo, searching his face, “what’s up?”

He rubs his neck, a mannerism that you’ve come to connect with him feeling uncomfortable.

“I’m sorry,” he starts, “I know I’ve been acting weird around you the past week, and…” he trails off again, still not meeting your gaze. Joel has never been good at expressing his feelings, and you can’t deny that you’re curious about what he’s going to say. You knew that it hadn’t been just about work stuff. Joel takes a deep breath, seemingly steeling himself for what he’s about to tell you.

“I didn’t- shit, I’m not good at this.” He rubs his neck again. “I didn’t want you to go out with that guy. And I know that that’s no excuse, but I wanted… I wanted you to go out with me. I’ve wanted that for quite some time, honestly. And I never knew how to tell you, I didn’t want to ruin the friendship that we have, but then that- that fuckin’ guy came along and I just thought, what if I had my chance and I missed it? But still, I shouldn’t have put that on you, I-”

You interrupt his rambling when you step into his space and place your hand on his upper arm, his gaze finally flying up to meet yours.

“You wanted… to go out with me?” you whisper, almost not able to believe what you’ve just heard.

“I- yes. I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I’ll never mention it again, I just wanted you to know.” He shrugs helplessly and you can’t help the smile that’s slowly growing on your face.

“Joel,” you murmur, taking another step closer to him. “I’d love to go out with you. I never thought- you never said anything, and I didn’t want to make things awkward between us, but…”

This might be it, the moment that you’ve always hoped for but never thought would happen.

“I like you. More than as a friend. I mean, I really like you.”

Now you’re avoiding his gaze, feeling heat flush your cheeks at your admission. You feel his fingers on your chin, tilting your face up to meet his warm brown eyes, so close to you.

“Guess we’ve both been kinda idiots,” he smirks.

A grin is slowly spreading on your face. “Guess so.”

He leans towards you and your eyes slowly close, just before his lips touch yours.

None of you are aware of the audience that’s observing the both of you from the living room.

“Fuckin’ finally,” Tommy mutters as he leans back into the couch and takes another sip of whiskey. Sarah and Ellie both sigh in agreement.

thank you so much for reading! if you liked it, please consider reblogging or leaving a comment - nothing would make me happier 🫶🏻

#secret santa 2023 #val <3 #janas fics #joel miller #joel miller fanfiction #the last of us #the last of us fanfiction #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal characters fanfiction #pedrostories

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idesofrevolution · 1 year

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Something’s Wrong with Luca

Teddy and Lucas were the best of friends. For the past fifteen years, since Lucas' family moved to town from Argentina, the two were inseparable. In fact, Teddy could remember the very day that they met as if it had happened the day before. Sitting in the back row in homeroom, seventh grade, Ms. Posner's old cadaverous talons gripping the Argentine boy's shoulders as she presented him to the class... Lucas didn't speak English very well at the time, so few if any of the other kids were particularly interested in being his friend. In most of his classes, at least for the first few years, he had to have an aide to help him through his coursework; most of the other kids assumed he was stupid and quiet. But the moment he was sat next to Teddy, sharing that genuine smile, it sparked the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

As Lucas' english speaking continued to improve, Teddy discovered a goofy, funny, laid back kid who just wanted a friend. They weren't popular kids, passing on sports teams, drama club, music ensembles, art club... they spent their time playing in the woods, creating fantastical realms of pirates and kings, elves and dwarves. In their fantasy worlds, they were safe. They were away from the judging eyes of their peers where they could truly be themselves. And so on it continued for the better part of a decade. Upon graduation, they had grown into two wildly intelligent, albeit a bit awkward young men ready to tackle the world. Though, as Teddy went on to university to study literature, Lucas' family wasn't able to afford any of the colleges he'd been accepted to. Thus, for the first time in their lives, the two were separated. Teddy flew across the country to Virginia for college, and Lucas stayed behind to work in his father's mechanic shop.

Their new situations were polar opposite, though their communication and relationship never faded. At least once a week they would facetime, updating eachother on their lives. The dynamic was as solid as it ever was, until it wasn't.

One cold January evening, Teddy sat down for his weekly video call, excited beyond words to tell Lucas about the new PS5 he'd bought for them to play Rocket League together on weekends. Though as call after call went unanswered, he decided to call it a night and touch base with him the next morning. Though, as morning came and went, there was still no sign of Lucas. His social medias went without updates, Teddy's texts went entirely unanswered, the only news heard from him whatsoever was from his step brother who mentioned that he'd seen Lucas working hard at the shop and hitting the gym he'd frequented.

This was the first peculiar incident that Teddy had noted. He'd known Lucas for years and while he was a lot of things, athletic was NOT one of them. It'd always been them versus the meatheads, and it was not like him to even consider lifting so much as a five pound weight. They would joke about the stupid smelly brutes in the school gym, mindlessly picking heavy things up and putting them back down again for some sense of marginal achievement. Though this would be only the beginning of Lucas' odd behavior. Months went by, Teddy checking his Instagram every day looking for a single sign his friend was doing alright, until one day as he was scrolling, he saw it.

It was Lucas, though not the proud, stringy outcast he'd left behind. This Lucas was ripped, proudly posing shirtless in some fancy-looking room he had never seen before, a cocky smirk plastered on his sweet face. The caption read:

"Workout complete: who's gonna give me a tongue bath?" followed by a slew of hashtags. Teddy's face flushed white as snow. Who was this person? What happened to him? Tapping his icon, Teddy saw that Lucas had changed his screenname to Luca, and this thirst trap he'd posted was the first one in over four months. Unsure of how to approach this vastly different person, Teddy replied to the post with a simple shocked emoji and hit send. It didn't take long before his phone dinged with a message: it was from Luca.

L: "yo sorry I been afk bro. my cuz julio been visiting from buenos aires... so i been hangin wit him. wuts up bro"

Immediately, Teddy thought his phone had been hacked. Luca had spent years perfecting his english, almost to the point where he would have been a tutor in the writing center had he wanted to be one. His texts were always grammatic perfection, down to the last punctuation mark.

T: "Uh, that's fine. I didn't know you had a cousin? You never talked about him or anything."

L: "bruh i didnt know he existed til he showed up. hes dope af. showin me some pointrs at liftin n shit. been changin my life. you gotta meet him when you come back."

T: "Sure, Lucas. I would love to meet him. I should be back next week actually, the semester is almost over. Maybe we can play RL at my place!"

L: "hah i dont think hed be into that kinda stuff. you shud hit the gym wit us when we go, get that pump goin ykwim. you gon love him."

Teddy frowned, had Lucas changed that much in the span of a few months? It wasn't just the physical differences, it was his attitude, it was his style, it was the way he talked, it was just... all wrong.

T: "Lucas, are you okay?"

L: "never better man. its Luca btw. fits better i think"

With that last text, Teddy decided to leave him on read. Lucas... or Luca rather, wasn't one to drink or do illicit substances. Though aside from that, he couldn't think of any other explanation for this dramatic shift in his friend's entire personality. He resolved then and there to get to the bottom of this, and he would do so in person the following week.

Thus, as he finished his finals, packed his bags and flew back home, the singular thing on his mind was seeing Luca. Arriving home, he monotonously went through the motions of greeting his parents and step brother, anxiously fidgeting on the car ride back from the airport. He didn't even take time to unpack his bags. The moment his mom's car parked in his driveway, he'd politely excused himself to go meet up with Luca. Hopping on his bike, he left his visibly confused family in the dust, rushing to the mechanic shop downtown where Luca worked.

By the time he got there, the shop was closing up for the day. Teddy ditched the bike on the concrete and burst into the front office, startling the lady behind the desk. Panting and sweaty, he collapsed onto the front desk.

"Uhm... Is Lucas here?" He breathlessly choked out the words to the woman, who confusedly cocked her head to the left. "Oh, I guess it's Luca now?" This name evidently struck a chord, where she nodded and pointed to the back room where the lockers sat. Teddy thanked her and slowly walked toward the big grey door. Placing his hand on the cold steel handle, he closed his eyes repeating to himself hopes that the person behind the door was the same one he'd always known. As he pressed the handle down and pushed the door open, the wet, dank smell of ripe sweat poured out. There, sitting on the bench, taking off his beat up pair of steel toed work boots was a shirtless Luca, almost twice the size he had been before. Where he used to be 5'8 and 101 lbs soaking wet, this Luca was easily 6'4 and pure muscle. His biceps bulged as he yanked his boot from his massive foot, veins pulsating up and down his arms. That boyish face remained, albeit with a newfound twinge of cockiness that was entirely counter to the mousy, nervous expression Teddy had grown to love. The moment he looked up, Luca grinned from ear to ear, hopping to his damp, socked feet and rushing his long lost best friend, throwing his arms wide to embrace him.

"Teddy!" Luca's chiseled body collided with Teddy's, holding him tightly against his statuesque torso with his face pressed against his sweat-slick pecs. Teddy felt like a child now compared to his friend, now transformed into a complete stranger. "It's so good to see you, hermano!" A thick Argentine accent bellowed from his newly baritone timbre- one that had been all but lost in school, but now prominently flowed from his supple lips. Teddy pulled away sharply, taking a step back in shock. "Oh, ¿es el olor? My bad, mi cuate. Long day of hard work, right?" Luca laughed, raising his arm to take a deep whiff of his dripping pits. "Ahhh. You grow to like it, me entiendes?" His jovial demeanor quickly subsided as he saw the look of absolute shock on Teddy's face.

"Lucas... What the fuck happened to you?"

"It's Luca now, hermano. I told you. Still the same guy as before, just a lil different now."

"Yeah... different. You can say that again." Luca sighed as he plopped back down onto the bench, spreading his legs wide as he rubbed his face.

"Yeah. I get it, man. It's a lot to take in, verdad? I told you my cousin Julio was in town for a while?" Teddy sternly nodded, straining to contain his contempt for this sharp departure of personality. Luca looked downward. "Yeah, well. He was a lot different from the rest of mi familia. He was a proud Argentino hombre. He was okay with not having perfect english, he wasn't scared of bein' different or bein' looked down on. Someone looked sideways at him and they'd have a broken jaw, me entiendes? It... it was so fuckin' nice to have someone around like me who was cool and strong and proud... I always wanted to be someone like him, Teddy. Always." Teddy saw a different Luca before him. Yeah, he was different, he was the embodiment of the thirst-trapping, smelly jock bros they hated as kids. Yet, in this moment of vulnerability, he saw the Luca he knew deep down.

"Luca, all those years of us being friends, being this close, you never told me that." His head hung low, running his hands through his sweaty locks.

"That's not the only thing I haven't told you, man."

"Luca, you can tell me anythi..." Luca threw his head straight up, staring Teddy straight in the eye before blurting out:

"TEDDY I FUCKIN' LOVE YOU!" The room fell silent. Both men sat there, not breaking eye contact, neither wanting to be the first to speak. Of course, someone had to be the one, and Luca sighed as he continued. "Mi amor, I have always loved you. Since day one. Lookin' at eachother in that old bat's class, I knew I wanted to be near you. With you. And it wasn't 'til Julio made me realize I should have fuckin' said somethin' that I let my balls drop and promised I would tell you. So yeah, man. I love you." Luca stood up abruptly, with a confidence entirely foreign to Teddy and towered above his infatuation. "And you know what? I think you love me too."

Teddy was gobsmacked. This was a revelation he wasn't prepared to address. Luca loved him? This cocky, jockish best friend of his loved him? More importantly, did he love him back? They stood there, waiting once again for the ice to be broken. Before long, Luca had turned around and began to pack his duffel bag, fearing he'd gotten the answer he was hoping to avoid. Yet, perhaps it was a moment of clarity, or even a moment of weakness, but something deep within Teddy surged up from his core out his mouth.

"I love you too." The quiet admission didn't go unnoticed, as Luca stopped everything he was doing and immediately turned around. "Yeah, I think I love you too Luca. You may be different now than you were, but all this time I couldn't stop thinking about you. How much I missed you, how I would have rather spent every single second with you than every moment of being out there without you." Luca smiled earnestly, slowly moving toward his cowering love. "And it made me scared and uncomfortable because I was terrified things were changing and I stayed the same. Seeing you like this this, you're doing what I could never do. You're growing, you're becoming the best version of yourself, and I didn't know if you'd even want to be around me anymore or if you'd be ashamed..." Teddy's groveling finally ended with Luca's lips firmly pressing against his, the stubble on his chin scratching against Teddy's smooth skin. His inhibitions melted away, Teddy allowed himself to fall into the sweaty stud's firm hold, wrapped in a warm sticky embrace.

"Do you wanna to be your best self then, mi amor?" Luca whispered so gently, as if his words were caressing the ear. Breathless, Teddy could only nod as he allowed his endorphins to take over. "Julio showed me how. Do you trust me?" Another silent nod, stifling a guttural moan as he felt Luca's bulge rapidly growing firm against his stomach. This was the explicit consent that Luca felt he needed, he was desperately aching to bestow upon his lover Julio's gift which he had been given months before.

Teddy felt a firm grip against his shoulders pressing him down to his knees, until he was eye level with the lengthening rod which strained against Luca's thick sweatpants. For so long he'd suppressed his innate desire to give it the worship he felt it had never received and as Luca threw the waistband down to his ankles, he was not disappointed as it flew up and smacked him in the jaw. Before him was the most anatomically perfect cock he'd ever seen: easily 10.5 inches of thick, uncut, musky dick. Two large-egg sized balls sagged low behind it, spattered with selective hairs and dripping sweat. Teddy felt drool begin to drip from the bottom of his lip, the sheer heat of the musty hot rod only millimeters from the tip of his nose. Luca smiled, wrapping his hand around it and pulling his long foreskin down, revealing the pink, leaking mushroom head it contained.

"Julio showed me an old family secret. Only a few of us can do it, and I want to do it for you, mi amor." He began to stroke slowly; his member immediately taking direct notice, throbbing in a fervor more akin to convulsion. "He fucked it up last time, he didn't come back. But now thanks to him... I know how to give it to you, babe." Luca took his thumb and gently pried Teddy's mouth open. Eager to please, Teddy quickly took the opportunity to lick the tip of his cock, instantly savoring the powerful flavor of his dripping pre. It was unlike anything he'd ever tasted. Sweet, salty, sour, savory... every taste bud fired thousands of endorphins in his brain. "Get your tongue in there, Cariño. Let it in." Teddy's tongue acted as if it were under another power, softly probing the leaking slit of the head and causing Luca to groan in ecstasy, throwing his head back. Grabbing the back of his head, in one firm push, Luca speared Teddy's gaping maw with his musky cock, pressing the nose firmly into his ripe bush.

Teddy was nearly scent-drunk in his love's dank, masculine smell, and only after a split second did he realize his entire tongue had slipped into Luca's thick rod. Grunting like a man in heat, the latin adonis gritted his teeth in a mixture of pain and pleasure as he felt Teddy's tongue slowly retract out of his cock. Released from his impalement, Teddy observed the wide opening of the cockslit in full view. Luca's hands gripped his palms, guiding his index finger back to the inviting orifice, effortlessly slipping in and sounding into his member. Elastic stretching sounds echoed in the room as the cock widened to fit his finger, then two, then four... until the whole hand was inside.

Teddy felt entranced, completely enveloped in the heat of the moment, plunging his second hand into the gaping hole. It stretched wide to welcome him, and with a single glance upward to a winking Luca, he understood. Teddy worked quickly, using forward momentum and the increasing suction within the engorged cock to propel his head forward into the tight wet cavern. The rest happened quickly. The sucking member had taken his arms and head entirely inside of it, squeaking and expanding as it guzzled his shoulders, chest and midsection. He could feel Luca lift his dick upward, letting him slide deeper and deeper. It was constricting, it was tight, it was wet, it smelled funky and ripe... it was the best sensation he'd ever felt. As his thighs and calves were made quick work of, only his feet remained outside of the slit. It took mere seconds for them to slurp inside.

Luca's cock was as large as he was, veins bulging and the entire length of it bulging and contorting as it worked Teddy down little by little toward his balls. He began to pump toward his sweaty balls, until he could feel the tips of his boyhood friend's fingers reach the opening into his cavernous testes. As if a seal had been broken, Teddy's body fell into the ocean of spunk, swelling his balls to accommodate the entire human being being nestled into his sac. The pace of his cock pumping hastened, as he felt closer and closer to climax. He felt the rigid bones and gelatinous fat begin to melt into his seed as Teddy was assimilated entirely into his system. Just as Julio had done to him, and just as he had in turn done to Julio. His breathing shallowed, gasping for air as he reached his tipping point, shooting out cum like a firehose all over the interior of the room. In it, was every insecurity, every pain, every imperfection which had plagued his lover since he was forced into the world. Gallons, tens of gallons in cum painted every surface around him, and as his balls began to shrink back down to the size of cantaloupes, he could feel his body churning Teddy down, incorporating him into the remnants of what was left of Julio. The gift itself, handed down the line for thousands of years was being imbued into the very core of Teddy's being. Julio had overshot his escape route in the heat of his own carnal lust, being broken down and slowly assimilated into Luca's body. The cockiness, the libido, the drive, the gift all now coursed through Luca. He was gone, but he didn't have to be wasted.

Over the next few weeks of churning, gurgling, bubbling, and undulating, Teddy was broken down and rebuilt only to be broken down again. Each time, a little more of Julio's essence would incorporate into him, even some of Luca himelf found its way into his shapeless form. Every workout that he did provided bursts of testosterone into the mix, and every jerking session flooded serotonin and glutamate. And after carefully monitoring the time, ensuring that Teddy would not meet his cousin's fate, three months later, it was time.

Sitting down in the luxurious apartment paid for by thirsty gay subscribers to his JustForFans and PH videos, Luca took his cock into his hands once more. Gently. Slowly. Carefully. Never losing focus of what was at stake, he stroked. Within his heavy balls, his leche had begun to bubble and slosh, preparing itself for expulsion. He picked up the pace, lifting his arm to get a full inhale of his pungent, all-natural pit poppers. His cock began to pulse and crack, as the thick sludge began to make its way toward the exit. Sure not to fall into the same trap as before, he pulled away from his tangy stink and focused. It was time. His hand moved furiously up and down his slimy cock, dripping with pre which pooled at his big, musky feet. One final cry of euphoria and out shot his load. One barrage after another, thick and dense landing afront him. Each shot slowly coagulating into a recognizable form. It slowly hardened, the milky white color giving way to ivory, then light beige, then a warm tan. Muscles tightened beneath a smooth skin, their fibers reconnecting one by one until they were strong and lean.

By the end of the bombardment, the homunculus before him had stood up. It was as tall as him, as broad as him, as powerful as him, and as the form of it's face began to take shape, a single tear was shed from Luca's watery eyes. He recognized his love, he could see Teddy, albeit ever so slightly different. He had certainly taken more of Julio and Luca's essences than they'd anticipated. A sharp, chiseled jawline carved itself out of the miasma, dark brown locks of hair sprung from it's scalp and plump lips parted to allow the deep breath of life which had been denied until then. His caramel eyes opened, and he smiled.

#male transformation #body transformation #original #transformation #jockification #musk #musky #gay transformation #cockvore #assimilation #racial change #male tf

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lynnielovestlou · 1 month

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au where abby and reader try to break up :( emphasis on try because they just can’t stay away from each other :( they keep talking and updating each other on things until its too much :( and they get back together :)

(i put my whole back into this pls be nice)

꩜ cw: no smut! abby x reader , reader works at a plant nursery , use of pet names

masterlist

the breakup was rough, to say the least. abby was your first everything. your first kiss, your first girlfriend, your first time, and your first everything. letting go of that was the most heartbreaking thing either of you had gone through.

for the first couple of days post-breakup you could hardly eat and sleep. your bed felt so cold and so empty without her next to you. you even made a lame attempt to line some pillows up to make it seem like she was there. and for a moment, it worked. but her warmth wasn't there for you to wrap yourself in. her heartbeat wasn't there to listen to. and her arms weren't there to hold you.

despite the fact that you were no longer together, you still talked. but less than you usually did. so many messages went unsent, so many calls you hesitated calling.

the first time either of you said something to one another was when you texted her about the job you had been wanting for months. she knew how much you wanted to work at the plant nursery down the street from your apartment, even before you split up. so when you got the email after your interview saying that you got the job, your immediate instinct was to tell abby.

"i got the job!" you had texted her.

"thats so amazing, sweet girl." she responded so quickly that it made you think she was anticipating you to text her, "i'm proud of you."

and just like nothing had happened, you were smiling down at your phone, just like you were before you started dating.

but that butterfly feeling in your stomach didn't last long. it fizzled out when you remembered you were no longer with her.

over the course of a few days you chatted about little things. your first day at your new job. abby's dog, alice, catching a squirrel in her backyard. little, minuscule check-ins. nothing too serious.

until a week later.

"want to get coffee?" she texted you one day, while you were busy watering plants in your denim overalls.

it caught you by surprise, to say the least, but you knew it wasn't a date. just two friends getting together for a cup of joe. not romantic. strictly platonic.

no matter how much you wanted to run back into her muscular arms and re-familiarize yourself with her touch, you couldn't. you shouldn't.

"sure." you text her shortly, without the need to ask which coffee shop or what time. while you were dating, you went every week to the same coffee shop at the same time on the same day and ordered the same drinks.

⋆┈┈｡ﾟthat weekend ｡┈┈⋆

the second you walked through the doors of the coffee shop your nostrils were filled with the scent you missed so much. freshly brewed coffee grounds and warm pastries. the faint sound of chattering from the patrons enjoying their own treats.

and there she was.

sitting at a two-top table, two drinks in front of her. she was already looking at you, as if drinking in your image. even though you were devastated and still a little heartbroken from the previous events of your relationship, you did a good job at finding distractions. which is probably why you don't look quite as miserable as she does.

"hey." she greets you as you sit down across from her, "i um.. i ordered the drink you usually got."

she remembered.

the mug was still warm, so she couldn't have been here long.

"thank you." you nod your head once, "you didn't have to do that."

"its no big deal." she shrugs, taking a sip of her coffee. black coffee, to be exact. you never understood how she liked the bitter taste of it, "how have you been?"

"good." you answer quickly. so quick that she has a hard time believing you. in reality, you were good. but you weren't great. you would never admit to her how you would accidentally cook too much food, because you were used to cooking for two people. you would never admit how many times you've accidentally set the table with two plates instead of one. how you would say 'i'm home!' when you walk through the door, even when nobody was there to listen, "i'm uh.. how about you? how are you?"

"im alright." she says.

but not good. you tell yourself in your head.

for a little while the two of you just chit-chat back and forth, talking about nonsense for half an hour before you notice abby fidgeting. she can't sit still, and you have a gut feeling you know exactly what's wrong.

"sweetheart, i cant keep doing this." she finally breaks, interrupting your rant about how you hate one of your coworkers.

"wait, huh? did i say something wrong?"

she shakes her head, glancing around the coffee shop like she's afraid to make eye contact with you, "we shouldn't have broken up."

oh.

your heart falls to the pit of your stomach, "what?"

"i need you more than i thought i did. i miss you."

you stare at her, eyes wide and lips slightly agape. you wanted to hear these words, but you never thought that you ever would, "are you.. are you serious?"

she nods her head, looking back at you.

"abby, i... i dont know."

"baby." she breathes deeply, desperate for your forgiveness, "dont make me beg."

you exhale, your cheeks burning crimson. you had waited so long for one of you to finally say something about the breakup. you waited so long for one of you to speak up about the need for the other.

without another moment of hesitation, you lean across the table, boldly smashing your lips into hers.

she tastes sweet, just as she always had. she was wearing coffee and the mint chapstick you left at her house and she never returned it, because she liked being able to have your taste with her.

she smiles against your lips, baring all her teeth. when you both pull away you can see her little dimples on her cheeks, the skin underneath her freckles a light shade of pink.

"so.." she says, folding her hands together in her bulky lap, "is that a yes?"

#lynnielovestlou #lesbian #the last of us #queer #fanfiction #fanfic #abby anderson #abby anderson x fem reader #abby x you #fanfic fluff #abby fluff #lesbian fanfic

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sy3ra · 1 year

Text

tokyo rev series; when someone flirts with you.

episode I

sano manjiro ◖⁠⚆⁠ᴥ⁠⚆⁠◗

• is lowkey confident, lets them flirt with you.

• he knows he's your number 1 and you won't ever replace him.

• starts to worry when you (teasingly) take interest in them.

• clings to you when it gets out of hand.

• glares at the person flirting at you to the point they scurry away out if fear.

• you reassure him that you were only kidding and he'll forever be your number 1.

• you treat him with dorayaki as an apology.

matsuno chifuyu ʕ⁠っ⁠•⁠ᴥ⁠•⁠ʔ⁠っ

•gets worried and anxious that you'll leave him.

•who would leave this angel anyway, he's a walking green flag.

•you reject the person flirting with you because you notice chifuyu's anxiousness.

•you cuddle with him at home all day.

•you even call baji to come over so he can cheer up.

•ends the day eating peyoung yakisoba with you and baji.

• never leave this angel, ever.

haitani rindou ｡⁠◕⁠‿⁠◕⁠｡

•this man.

•he glares at them so intensely that the person flirting with you didn't even complete their sentence.

•wraps an arm around your waist to show them you're taken.

•after the person leaves, you kiss him on the cheek and reassure him that you didn't have any interest in that person.

•would blush so hard he looks redder than a tomato. He hides it from you though.

•cuddles with you all night long after.

mitsuya takashi(⁠✿⁠ ⁠♡⁠‿⁠♡⁠)

•he's always so calm but his face shows everything.

•would honestly not care until it gets out of hand.

•he trusts you. So it's hard for him to worry.

•but when he does, he drags you away and peppers your face with kisses and clings onto you like his life depends on it.

•looks out for mfs who try to flirt with you in the future.

baji keisuke (⁠╯⁠°⁠□⁠°⁠）⁠╯⁠︵⁠ ⁠┻⁠━⁠┻

•two words: total menace.

•shoots an intense glare at the person.

•would grab you close to him to show dominance.

•would burn their vehicle (if they have one)

•you teased him about it and the whole week turned into you two pulling mean pranks on each other.

•you two eventually called a truce and spent the weekend feeding stray cats.

kokonoi hajime (⁠｡⁠•̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✧

•would bribe them with money so they would stop flirting with you. Works almost every time.

•but if it doesn't work, he kisses you in front of them.

•if the mf won't really take the hint...he drags you away and distracts you by buying you ice cream.

•well its works you forget about what happened.

•you both spent the day shopping at the mall.

kurokawa izana (⁠๑⁠•⁠﹏⁠•⁠)

•stops whatever he's doing and stares at you both.

•drags you away from them.

•once you both are all alone he makes you face him.

•then he hugs you tightly. You were clueless to be honest.

•you pull away and you peck him on the lips.

•you made him teach you guitar so he would forget about it.

•if you tease him about it, oh boy, good luck surviving the night.

sano shinichiro¯⁠\⁠_⁠ʘ⁠‿⁠ʘ⁠_⁠/⁠¯

•this man...is so lazy.

•clings onto you and diverts your attention to him.

•drags you away (3)

•he hurries home and you know what's coming for you.

•you two spent the night making love ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

•"Is my Shin-chan jealous?" You told him.

•he didn't say anything and rested his head on your chest.

•:explodes:

wakasa imaushi ♡⁠˖⁠꒰⁠ᵕ⁠༚⁠ᵕ⁠⑅⁠꒱

•i mean your relationship with him is stable. He's calm and cool most of the time.

•he trusts you and knows you're his. No one would ever lay a hand on you.

•but if someone does..

•at first he isn't bothered knowing you wouldn't and would never replace him.

•he only gets bothered once he notices you're getting uncomfortable.

•you were tugging his sleeve and there was evident discomfort on your face.

•he makes the person leave.

•makes you forget about it by eating candies at home.

..next episode: no idea yet sorry. If you have any idea please do tell me.

07/02/23- update, next episode: tokyo rev series; when it's your birthday

-Mayven.

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girlwiththeobsessions · 4 months

Text

love sick c. f.

this book has also been published on wattpad. same username as the one on here. i update faster on there.

you and conrad had a secret relationship two summers ago, when you were 15 and he was 16. you broke up with him because your younger sister, belly had liked him, and you were afraid of hurting her. now, flash forward, you were 17, and you thought you had gotten over him, but maybe you haven’t

you are adopted in this! y/n's parents were close with the fishers and conklins but died in a car accident, so laurel adopts y/n

part 2

i. the drive

ME AND MY FAMILY have been coming to cousins since i was a baby, since before i was born.

the tradition was, me and my mom would go to the summer beach house in cousins, along with my moms friends, laurel park and susannah fisher, and laurel's daughter and son, and susannah's two sons.

the beach house felt magical, every summer, i couldn't wait to return each summer.

most of the time, me and belly would tag along with the moms, mostly just my mom.

my mom would take us shopping a lot, and get us frozen yogurt after, then we'd go swimming.

laurel and susannah didn't really like to swim with us. that's what made my mom so special. until both of my parents died. when i was seven. in a car crash.

my parents were my whole world. i miss them everyday.

after that happened, i had to move from north carolina to pennsylvania with the conklin's.

from what i remember, i was pretty shut down for the next two years, and sad all the time, but eventually i got better.

laurel had taken me in with her, john, steven, and belly, and i had my last name changed to l/n-conklin.

i had found hobbies to cope with my parents death. in sixth grade, i had taken up soccer. in eighth grade, i started volleyball. now, as a junior, i was on my schools soccer and volleyball team.

i was pretty smart too, academically. with my grades averaging with a's and b's since freshman year. i wanted to go to college, my dream school was university of southern california, usc.

today though, was the day i returned to cousins for the summer, of course, i was excited. i was in belly's room, packing, with taylor jewel, me and belly were both close friends with her.

"drew's bummed you're missing the beach match with the boys team next weekend." taylor told belly, laying down on the bed, on her phone.

belly turned around. "uh, make sure tell sophie to square up for the block." belly tells taylor, ignoring what she said.

"drew martinez is texting me about you, and you're talking about volleyball?" taylor said with a surprised expression.

"drew doesn't care if i'm there or not, he wants an excuse to text you." belly denied, not really acknowledging the fact that she had a glow up basically. "and you better take this game seriously, i mean, team pride is on the line, taylor."

"please, you know me better than that." taylor looked up. "i would never let a boy beat me at anything."

belly and i laughed. "i thought you came here to help us pack." belly smiled.

"fine.." taylor got up. "i'll help. here's a tip, don't bring that speedo. it doesn't do a thing for your new boobs." taylor said with a a laugh, sitting on belly's bed, flipping through a magazine.

"it's not a speedo." belly defended with a frown looking down at the swimsuit.

"yes it is." i intervene, looking at my phone.

"we're just saying babes, like you need to pack cute things." taylor says flipping a page in the magazine she's reading.

"well, i always buy a new suit when i get there." belly tells us with a smile.

"okay, well, buy one that doesn't look like you're trying out for the swim team." i pressed.

"are you serious y/n?" belly giggled, flopping onto the bed and launching herself onto me.

"girls! were leaving in the next 10 minutes!" laurel shouted from downstairs.

"we got to go." belly said with a frown.

"no, we don't, we still have 10 minutes!" i told the two of them with a smirk.

we started laughing again, but once it stopped, we sat on the bed, belly on the floor, taylor switching to a more serious tone.

"okay, before i let you both go you both have to tell me your summer wishes. like the one thing that you guys want to happen this summer."

"i don't know." belly took a deep sigh.

"you little liar, yes you do." taylor giggled at belly.

"you want a hot make out sesh with conrad fisher, you want his tongue in your mouth, you dirty little slut!" taylor joked.

i shifted uncomfortably, trying to plaster a laugh. "taylor! ew."

"i'm just saying, i mean, you've been in love with him since we were twelve." taylor reminded her as belly got up.

"it doesn't matter what i do, he doesn't see me that way." belly frowned.

"oh, he'll see you." i looked at belly up and down. "whether he wants to or not. you look a lot different than last summer, belly."

taylor laughed, then turned to me. "what about you, y/n?"

i looked away. "what about me?"

"your summer wish." taylor reminded me.

"i don't know yet." i sighed. "i guess go to a lot of parties, and make more friends."

"no boyfriend? no fling?" taylor asked, a little confused. "come on y/n, a whole summer on the beach? no nothing?"

"oh wow, big deal, a seventeen year old that doesn't care about a boyfriend." i sighed again. "i guess i've never really been that interested in getting a boyfriend." i shrugged. "i have other priorities."

i did. i applied for a job as a lifeguard at the country club, to get some money for college. i wanted to apply to ucla, it was my dream school.

i always try to keep myself busy, keep myself doing something productive, and i think the job would help.

"girls, we're leaving now!"

ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚

during the drive, belly got shotgun, steven was driving, and i sat in the backseat with mom, which i didn't really mind.

the song 'can't do better' by kim petras was blasting, while belly sung along from the top of her lungs.

i unbuckled my seatbelt and spread my legs across the backseat.

"uh, can you guys turn it down a little?" laurel asked. "and, y/n, sit right."

i sighed and sat straight, buckling my seatbelt. "i want you guys to be better about helping out this summer." laurel told us.

"don't just leave your dishes, load them into the dishwasher. and, not just your dish either, steven. i want you to be good houseguests." she continued.

"mom, susannah has people who clean, doesn't she?" steven asked, curiously.

laurel flicked steven on the head. "steven!"

"owww!" steven complained. "alright, alright. sorry."

mom is weird about money, the fact that susannah has money, and we don't.

"just.. be considerate, and act like i raised you right. steven, y/n, that means don't stay out too late."

"mommmm!" we both complained.

"i'm too old for a curfew." i frowned.

"wait, what about me? i don't have a curfew either, right?" belly asked from the front seat.

steven started to laugh. "what do you need a curfew for? you don't go anywhere."

"steven!" i threw my phone charger at him. "don't be a jackass."

"what?" steven continued laughing.

"we'll talk about it when it comes up." laurel told belly.

"oh, and y/n, don't forget, you promised you'd take me driving." belly reminded me.

"belly, i told you i'd take you." laurel intervened.

"yeah, but.. you're too judgy." belly quietly said.

me and steven started laughing. "excuse me?" laurel asked.

"yeah, sorry." belly laughed too.

we parked in front of the gas station me, belly, and mom going in.

belly got some cheetos and sour patches. she opened the bag of cheetos and ate a few.

"belly!" i whisper-yelled.

"what!?"

"at least pay for it first."

me and belly looked over at the register, to see a guy staring at us.

"hey." he nodded his head.

i smiled and waved, while belly grabbed a coke, and we brought our snacks up to the register.

"what's up with you, y/n?" jumper said with a smile.

"jumper? i didn't know you work here now." i said in surprise.

he turned to belly. "who's this? are you new this summer?"

belly looked behind her, then back at jumper. "uh, me? no.."

"really?" he smirked, and scanned the snacks. "thought i knew every pretty girl in cousins."

"ew, don't flirt with my little sister, idiot." i warned him.

to be honest, i wasn't really fond with jumper. the way he sort of treated girls like they were objects just wasn't too appealing to me.

he rolled his eyes. "whatever. you both coming to the bonfire tonight? first of the season."

"uh.. maybe." i responded.

"come!" he encouraged us, then turned to belly again with a smile. "i'll introduce you to some of my friends."

"maybe i will." belly smiled back

i gave belly a quick side eye. "maybe she won't." i look back to jumper, trying to protect belly.

laurel walked up to us. "after i get settled in, you wanna go to whale of a tale with me, so i can presign stock for the signing tonight?" she asked belly.

"uh..."

"remember.. when you used to sit on my lap when i used to sign there?" laurel continued

"no, i don't.. remember that." belly chuckled.

"i'll make you a deal." laurel said, as we walked out. "i'll let you pick out tonight's desert if you come in and keep me company."

"see you later." jumped smirked at belly.

"what's later?" laurel asked, curiously.

"nothing." belly responded, a little too quickly.

ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚

END OF CHAPTER

#conradfisherxreader #conradfisher #conrad fisher #conrad fisher x reader #the summer i turned pretty #tsitp #thesummeriturnedpretty

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1rsoldiersince2012 · 2 months

Text

Bound by Law (Matt Murdock x Reader)

Words: 3176 (chapter 49)

a quick update to break yet another writer's block * sighs *

49. Another night in Hell's Kitchen

"Who's this fancy looking fella?" Foggy asks, taking in Matt's appearance when you two come to the office minutes before the work day begins.

"You like it?" Matt slowly spins around, showing off his new navy blue suit, paired with a dark red tie with small black dots.

"Did you sell your kidney or something to buy this? Jesus, you're making me look like a subway worker." Foggy laughs, coming to touch Matt's suit to feel the material.

"Nah, got a good deal." Matt smiles, adding, "all the glory should go to y/n, she managed to bargain a smaller price."

Your cheeks turn a light shade of pink, and you quickly turn around from Foggy and Karen to hang your coat. "The owner is a friend of my mom and well, your blindness really soothed his character."

"Wait, wait. I think I'm missing something." Foggy stands, one hand on his hips, and intently looks at the two of you. "I think I need an explanation."

"Y/n invited me for Thanksgiving dinner and we raided the shops later." Matt shrugs as if it wasn't a big deal to hang out with an employee... On a holiday. At her parent's house.

"I just couldn't let him be sullen the whole weekend while we're all away." Making way towards the kitchen for coffee, you also escape curious glances, and soon, clients start coming, pilling up in the lobby with Karen. You don't get a chance to talk with Matt until noon, as he spends most of the time with Foggy, talking to clients and running around the lobby to print documents. You, however, continue to work alone in the office until the lunch break, and just when you thought you were all going to grab a bite, and you could have a chance to smoke a cigarette or two, three loud bangs on your office door, ruin all of your plans.

***

"I'm sorry... But your son has been involved in..." you raise your eyebrows at the short-haired black woman and her 16-year-old son, "an armed robbery?"

"Yes, I've already mentioned it four times."

"Sorry, I'm a bit... Not well today. So, Paxton, could you please tell me what exactly happened? If you want to stay out of jail, I need to hear every single detail."

Paxton's mother crosses her arms, clearly unhappy with the treatment she was receiving, while Paxton was sitting on one of the armchairs, not particularly bothered by the whole situation. "Nothing. My mother is exaggerating." He shrugs, looking out through the window.

"I'm sorry, he's joking, right sweetheart?" His mother tries to gently touch his arm, but Paxton slides away as far as he can. "He told me everything last night. That's why I came here without an appointment. I noticed how many people are here, I am so glad you could take us in during your break."

"Mrs Harris..." You begin, tapping your pen on your notebook, "enough with the pleasantries. I need the details so I could tell you if I'm able to help you and Paxton. Now, please, talk."

"Remember that article a couple of weeks ago about how five men robbed a jewelry store?" She asks, casting her eyes to the ground; you give her a negative answer and wait for a more detailed explanation. "Well, Paxton was involved in it."

"What did you steal?"

"Rings, necklaces, earrings. I found a box of them in his room." She answers for Paxton.

You look at the boy, noticing a small smirk he just bit away. "What were you planning to do with them, Paxton?"

"Sell. It's all gold." He rolls his eyes.

"Why?"

"I need money." Paxton says in a hurtful tone, sending a glare towards you.

"What for?" Your question hangs in the air heavily. "Why is a teenage boy so in need of money that he must go rob a jewelry store? Tell me, do you work somewhere?"

"No, the money that I bring home is enough." Mrs Harris answers for her son once more, and you look at him in thought.

"Is it drugs, Paxton? You need more money for a dose, don't you?" He stares back at you, visibly irritated. "Is it cocaine? Or marijuana? Do you smoke with your criminal friends after school? Where'd you get the guns from?"

"Excuse me, but these are false accusations, Miss y/l/n, I-"

You hold your hand up, and continue to look right at the boy. "It is drugs. Bloodshot eyes, runny nose. You keep buying those eye drops in hopes of concealing it, but they don't work, do they?"

"Miss-"

"How do you know?" He finally asks after failing the staring contest.

"I had my fair share of experience with drug addicts. Now, if we cleared this one up, where'd you get the guns and who were your accomplices?"

"I can't tell you. I made a promise." He protests in vain.

"Addict's promise is nothing more than an empty talk. Did they threaten you?" You're met with silence and uneasiness from Mrs Harris. "Paxton, we're bound by an attorney-client privilege. Whatever you say, stays in this room. I can only advise what's best for you in court."

"No."

"I think you're lying to me."

"Yes, okay? I had to keep my mouth shut so they would give me my share." You rub your forehead in thought, when Paxton speaks up again, "we found some guns in an abandoned place, it was like a warehouse or something. We only came there to threaten the owner, but then Joey fired a shot and... We didn't want to hurt anyone."

"Did you hurt someone?"

"No, the bullet went through the display glass, but we got scared and ran away." Paxton was still restricted, but after you assured that it stays between you three, he opened up.

"Did anyone see you?"

"No, we wore masks."

"Can you tell other names? Besides Joey?"

He hesitates, cracking his fingers, afraid to meet his mother's eyes.

***

"He's agreed to help us, in exchange for a full immunity."

"Did he give any names?" Mahoney asks, flipping over the papers.

"All of them." You answer, looking over at Mrs Harris and her son, still in your office. Matt and the rest of the office returned from their lunch break, and Matt was awkwardly hanging around Karen's desk, listening to you and Mahoney talking on the phone from time to time. Karen was pushing him to get a grip and finally start taking money from the clients, rather than doing everything for free; yet he kept pushing back with the same old arguments.

"Well, I need you to come to the station, so we could take the statement, only then I can guarantee a full immunity."

"Alright, we'll see you soon, Sergeant."

***

You enter Josie's before seven, pushing through the thick crowd to the pool tables, old rock music is blaring through the speakers on full volume. Some guy almost spills his drink and starts apologizing profusely, so you quicken your step until you finally see familiar faces of Nelson and Murdock. "Apologies for the delay, Mahoney held us up." You sigh, stopping in front of the pool table to watch how Foggy misses a perfect shot.

"He likes to do that a lot." Foggy comments, trying to cover up his incredible failure.

"What happened? You were gone the whole afternoon." Matt fixes his glasses, directing his movements elsewhere, although he wanted to at least put a comforting hand on your shoulder... But not in public.

"Uh... Whiskey neat?" You ask him, snatching his drink without waiting for an answer, and when the alcohol burns your throat, finally reply, "so basically, the warehouse where the kids found guns belong to the irish, yes, yet another gang in Hell's Kitchen. And the police are on the lookout for them, but it seems that they went into hiding." You put an empty glass on the table next to you, and touch Matt's shoulder, "Next one's on me."

"Wait, so what happened to the kids?" Karen asks, sipping her own drink, which you notice to be the same brand of beer that Matt keeps buying for himself.

"We all talked, but of course, their parents weren't happy with the charges, so none of them confessed, but Paxton's on tape, and he still has the full immunity on the table."

"And the store owner?"

"He didn't recognize any of them, but he did recognize the stolen jewelry that Paxton brought with him. At least they were smart enough to wear masks, but if Mahoney pulls out a search warrant, it's over for them." You sigh, plopping on the chair nearby. "I'm dog tired and I can't believe I've walked all the way from the station here."

"Hey, it's time to relax now, we've got all gang here!" Foggy puts his hands on your shoulders and shakes, a bit too strong for your liking.

"Nelson and Murdock are finally back!" Karen lifts her bottle and cheers when Matt's shot goes right into the hole.

"That's a pretty damn good shot there, Murdock." You comment, and Matt's cheeks slightly blush. You quickly check him out, relaxed and laid back, his jacket ditched somewhere on the chair, the sleeves of his shirt rolled up and his strong arms exposed. If you could, you'd take him right here in the filthy bathroom of Josie's bar; but you can only bite your lip and wait for Josie to bring you a drink.

Matt laughs, "I only got lucky this time."

"He's been riding on that luck the whole evening, don't trust his words." Foggy comments and goes around the table to find the best position for himself again.

*** The evening goes by quickly, you've already lost the count on how many drinks you have consumed in those couple of hours, the bar is nowhere near empty, on the contrary, it only became fuller. Foggy has won two out of six rounds against Matt and has been glued to his beer ever since, apart from an occasional bathroom break, and now it was Karen v Matt in the 'grand pool battle', as Foggy called it.

Your phone vibrates and you pull it out of your purse, confused. 1 new message. You can't help but look around the bar, before opening the message from an unknown number. Maybe Todd has come back to haunt you again?

U/N: hey, just wanted to check in, how are you?

You: sorry, who's this?

You see three dots appear and disappear multiple times, and at last, the person texts back, you quickly sober up.

U/N: It's Poindexter.

U/N: don't mean to appear like a stalker, but got your number from the case documents.

You: Oh

Dex clenches his jaw tightly, and Ray turns to look at him, clutching his phone. "You alright?"

"Yeah, yeah." Dex answers, briefly looking around where they have parked their car. Dex and Ray were on a lookout mission tonight, and after a long afternoon of contemplating, he finally gathered enough courage to text you. And your response wasn't as warm as he expected it to be.

After two long minutes, which felt like an hour to Dex, you finally started typing something. Ray side-eyed his partner with rising interest, pretty much because he has never seen him staring at his phone like that. Dex's small smirk to your message added more suspicion to the already boiling pot.

You: does this count as a part of your job, agent?

Dex: not when I'm off duty.

You: are you off duty now?

Dex: well, I guess you caught me this time.

Matt listens to the sudden liveliness of your phone, slightly confused, but then Karen appears next to him and offers to teach how to play pool 'correctly', despite the obvious fact that he's been playing with Foggy the whole evening. You watch them from behind a half empty glass of whiskey, catching the way drunken Karen allowed herself to boldly touch Matt. You shouldn't be mad or jealous... Theoretically... Because you two weren't public or official. But theory aside, you were biting your cheek to refrain from a sarcastic remark. Matt couldn't help himself but smile awkwardly when he felt Karen's fingers sliding along his arm; her closeness was too much for his liking, especially in front of you; but your attention was somewhere else already.

You: didn't think feds worked overtime. You replied cheekily, but then added, I'm ok. Thanks for asking, Dex.

Dex's response was quick, you don't know a lot about us then. I guess everything that happened was very hard for you.

You get a fresh glass of whiskey, thinking over his message. It was strange, that when your life has finally settled, weeks after Teneke's murder, Dex decided to text you. Although there was some truth in his words, it was hard, the nightmares weren't the fun part of the whole thing too... But it was all in the past now; with Matt by your side, you allowed yourself to relax and not think of all the bad things that happened in your life since your return to Hell's Kitchen.

You: it was, yeah. If we're already on this subject, how are you?

Dex: I'm good, thanks.

And he was, especially when you texted back. His smile, even though a brief one, didn't go unnoticed by Ray. Dex wanted to text something else, keep the conversation going, but his mind was blank, especially when it came to making small talk; although he was now guarded by his phone and safe from any first-hand awkwardness, Dex still didn't know how to deal with the sudden stress. But his self-pitying session got interrupted by your message, so, what are you up to right now? So, you did care after all. Enough to not let this conversation die.

Dex: on a lookout for a bad guy, pretty boring. And you? Hopefully something more exciting.

You: in a bar, drinking my salary away with the bosses. How bad that bad guy is?

Dex: pretty bad in my opinion. Don't drink too much, you won't feel well tomorrow :)

You lock your phone and notice that Foggy and Karen were already dressed up.

"Look who's off her phone already, you missed all the fun." Foggy says, buttoning his coat up.

"You're leaving already?"

"Yeah, Karen's afraid to go home alone and I-"

"I am not!" Karen giggles, steadying herself against the pool table. Matt laughs, leaning on the pool cue and sips his beer.

"Huh, maybe I should head home as well... Just want a cigarette so bad, haven't had one the whole day." You sigh, and say your goodbyes to Foggy and Karen. The bar is still full, Josie's been running non-stop, and you think to yourself if it's always like this on a Monday night.

"That leaves just two us now, huh?" Matt says, striking the white ball into the red one.

"Isn't this just so romantic?" You laugh, walking closer to Matt, and whispering in his ear, "those shouting ones really know how to create an atmosphere...Full of sweaty bodies and that stink of cheap beer."

"I'd say this is perfect." He laughs, handing you the pool cue.

"No, I don't play."

"Come on, let me teach you."

"Really? And how will you do that?"

"With your help, of course." Matt laughs into your ear, and puts his hands around your shoulders, positioning the cue in your hands. "Now, turn where the white one is." You do that, noticing that there's a green ball right behind the white one. "And now, you strike that ball into another one, like that." He pushes the cue with quick, powerful movement, still holding your hand.

"It went in!"

"See, it's easy." He smiles, forgetting that he was gonna ask you who was texting you this late in the evening. You celebrate for a moment, but then grab Matt's hand, asking to go home. And who was Matt to refuse your ideas, when he knew how tired you were?

As you were waiting for a taxi outside, Matt was standing so close to you that you smelled his perfume mixed with all the smells of the bar even through your burning cigarette.

"Listen, I wanna ask you something, y/n." He begins, shuffling his feet on the sidewalk. "Do you... Would you like to go on a date tomorrow evening?"

"A date?" You ask again, averting your attention from the passing cars. "Matt, we've been together for like a month."

"I know, and I haven't asked you on a date once, that's on me." His warm hands found yours and squeezed affectionately, "let's go to some nice place, maybe not too expensive," you laugh and it's like music to his ears, "I would choose it myself, but unfortunately," Matt gestures to his glasses, "I'll put on my best suit, and you could put on that silk dress I helped you choose... What do you say?"

You wanted to kiss him right now and never let him out of your arms, "I have one place in mind... I just hope that it will be as romantic as Josie's."

He laughs, throwing his head back, "so, that's a yes?"

"Affirmate, Mr Murdock." You kiss him on the cheek, leaving the biggest smile on his face.

***

"Hey, I told you I'm sorry, I tried to reason with my mother to not go to that lawyer!" Paxton's voice rings in the dark alley, four dark figures hovering above him menacingly.

"So you had to tell our names to save your own ass, didn't you?" Joey asks, kicking Paxton's thigh with enough force to earn a loud cry.

"I was busted either way. She cracked me about the drugs, I can't be in jail for having drugs in my house, please!"

"You're just a pussy, Paxton. I always knew you were the weakest link." Toby says, pulling the hood off his head. "We could've sold that gold for good money and taken more guns from the warehouse, but it's all busted now. And whose fault is that?"

"Guys, please," Paxton shields his head from another kick, "I beg you, stop, I'll take everything back, I promise-"

"I don't take promises from a snitch. We should just kill you right now." Joey says, picking up a brick from the ground, and gets hit by one of Daredevil's billy clubs, which bounces off to knock out Toby. The rest of the gang look around in panic, until they notice a dark figure on one of the rooftops, and another billy club flies through the air and knocks them out as well.

"Please, please, don't kill me, Daredevil!" Paxton lies back down, keeping his hands in the air.

The devil of Hell's Kitchen lands on the ground switfly with little effort and picks up his billy clubs, agonizingly slowly stalking towards Paxton. "Call the police, call your lawyer first thing in the morning, leave no details, you understand? Drop the shady business or I won't be so nice the next time we meet." Matt rasps out, in case Paxton has heard him speaking in the office.

"Okay, okay, I'll do it, please don't hurt me anyone." Paxton cries out, holding his bruised side.

"Make the call right now, Paxton, I won't ask again."

The boy pulls out his phone, screen almost shattered from the kicks and dials the emergency number, fearfully looking at his knocked out friends and Daredevil himself, standing and looking right at him.

Another typical night in Hell's Kitchen.

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rocketrhap3000 · 2 years

Text

‘The Road Goes Ever On and On’ - part 7

summary: everything with bucky is fantastic, and the two of you finally make it official by going out for dinner.

a/n: i decided to come back to this series for my own pleasure lol, i missed writing it and i decided that all y’all in my inbox asking about this fic deserved to get an update, although it’s very untimely lol.

warnings: singlemom!reader, domestic!bucky, alpine barnes, dinner date, nonalcoholic wine consumption, awkward cutesy bucky, talk of sex/intimacy, extreme sexual tension between bucky and reader :))))

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The rest of the weekend at Sam’s simply flies by. You’re genuinely surprised with just how quickly time goes when you’re spending it with Bucky. It actually makes it hard for you to leave on Sunday afternoon, knowing this little retreat can’t last forever, but Jasper has an even harder time with leaving.

Although he can be the sweetest at times, your son sure does know how to throw a fit. Luckily, Bucky now knows how to calm him down. It was miraculous, really, the way Bucky talked Jasper out of his tantrum. You don’t even know what he said to get the toddler to stop crying, but whatever it was, you’ll need to know for the future.

Maybe it was because Bucky brought up the fact that Jasper needs to get back to his little betta fish who probably misses him. Maybe it was just because of Bucky’s calming demeanor and his gentle approach that Jasper felt content and calm again. Any way it happened, it’s a good thing you don’t plan on getting rid of Bucky any time soon.

The three of you fall back into the week resuming your usual, mundane routines. Jasper goes back to school, Bucky’s hours at the coffee shop are mostly the same, and yours at the office are back to normal, too.

But everything with Bucky feels better now.

It was already fantastic, but now that you’ve confessed your attraction to each other, it’s just become more comfortable and less awkward. There’s no more tip-toeing around the sweet gestures, no more excuses for needing to cuddle or talk, no more avoiding physical contact, and all the more reason to share little moments of affection.

Every morning, you drop off Jasper at school on the way to work; every afternoon, Bucky picks up Jasper from school on his way home from work; and every evening when you get home, he has dinner waiting for you. He goes out of his way to ensure you feel supported by him, whether it’s making your favorite meal, a long hug after a hard day, or the simplicity of telling you, “You’re doing great,” or “I’m here for you.” It feels like your own perfect, little, family.

You do try to limit your PDA in front of Jasper, though, just because you want to avoid any more big changes he will have to adapt to. You try to keep your affection contained to when he’s not around, which is pretty rare. Most of your time spent just one on one is after Jasper has gone to bed, giving the two of you the opportunity to exchange soft kisses or cuddle on the couch in private. But any time the toddler does catch the two of you sharing a hug or a dainty kiss, like when one of you leaves for work or just to be silly, Jasper squeals in excitement.

Other than the newfound comfort in showing affection and more romantic words of affirmation between you and Bucky, things are pretty much all the same in the Barnes-(Y/LN) household. You never realized just how many things the two of you did that were couple-like even before you admitted your feelings for each other.

You’re so happy with Bucky, and you know Jasper is, too.

~~~

“So y’know James, right? Bucky?” you ask Natasha over FaceTime one afternoon at your lunch break.

“That’s a random change of topic,” Nat laughs, but nods all the same. “Yeah, of course I know Bucky! He’s easily one of our customers’ favorite workers. ”

“What do you mean?” you ask, feeling a little surge of innocent jealousy that maybe someone else has a crush on your beloved, beefy barista.

“Well, apparently he does art in the foam of the coffees from time to time and he helps old ladies out to their cars on snowy days and things like that. Regulars ask about him on his days off, so I guess he’s a fan favorite.”

“That’s adorable,” you giggle, just thinking about how stinking cute Bucky must look doing his job. “But how the heck did I not know about the coffee art thing?”

“Well, he’s pretty on the down-low about it. He likes to think no one knows it’s him, but Yelena almost always works the same shift as him now and she fills me in on all his little antics,” Nat explains with a knowing glance. “He’s so shy at work, but everyone loves him. I mean everyone. And he’s super talented with the designs in the coffee, honestly.”

“He’s never made art in my coffees before!” you playfully pout, but genuinely wonder why he hasn’t shared this with you.

You haven’t gone to the coffee shop in a while, but you just might have to sometime soon, just to see Bucky in action.

“Oh, you’re still living with him, right?” Nat then asks.

It’s been a while since the two of you had time to really catch up, and there sure is a lot of new news you have to share with her.

“Yeah…” you start slowly, then take a deep breath to start your next statement. “And… well, you know how you thought we were dating when I first moved in with him?”

“(Y/N)!” the red head practically yells through the screen with excitement. She knows where this is going. “Are you guys actually together now?”

“Well…” you giggle nervously, feeling your heart begin to race. “Kind of, I guess.”

“(Y/n), I’m so happy for you!” she exclaims, and you’re almost sad that you’re not with her in person to share this big news. “When did you guys make it official?”

“Uh… I don’t know that we did… I mean, make it official. I think we just admitted we like each other. And a kiss or two has been shared,” you throw in, just because.

“You’re adorable,” Nat giggles at your bashfulness. “(Y/n), if you need me to watch Jasper for a night so that you guys can go out and get dinner or go do something to make it official on an actual date, please let me know,” she offers happily.

“I think we may just take things slow, y’know. But that would definitely be helpful, so I will certainly take you up on your offer,” you smile.

“Good! This is so good for you, (Y/n). I’m so, so proud of you and so happy you have this bond with him. He seems like such a sweet guy.”

“He really is. And you should see the way he is with Jasper. I’m so grateful he has both you and Bucky as role models. You guys have been the best for both of us.”

“Well, you deserve the best, babe. Even if you won’t admit it,” she gives you a sassy smile, to which you roll your eyes in response.

“I love you,” you giggle.

“I love you, too,” she smiles right back.

“Well, I have a meeting in a few minutes so I’m gonna let you go. But I’ll definitely talk to Bucky tonight so we can maybe plan to go out for dinner or something,” you tell her.

“Please do!” she nods. “Good luck with your meeting!”

“Thank you! See you later!” you wave.

She waves back, then blows you a kiss, and then the call ends.

You giggle again, just to yourself.

Life is pretty good.

~~~

That afternoon, you get to sneak out of work a little earlier than usual. Glancing at the clock in your car, you see that Jasper and Bucky should have just gotten home about an hour before. There’s a longing in your heart to get back to your boys to relax a little for the rest of the evening as you make a direct trip home from your office.

After parking your car in the driveway, you grab your things and rush to the front door as quickly as you possibly can as the desire to be wrapped in Bucky’s strong arms starts to take over you.

When you enter the house, you close the door gently behind you upon hearing the faint sound of some soft, old song playing from the kitchen. You hang your coat and bag on the hooks in the entryway, then kick off your shoes before slinking into the kitchen.

The sight you come across as you enter is quite possibly the cutest. Once you get close enough, you can hear that the song is one by Elton John, and Bucky is humming quietly and swaying along to it as stands at the counter, cutting up some vegetables.

Sneakily, you approach him from behind, hoping he doesn’t hear you.

“Buckyyy,” you greet him in a quiet, sing-song manner, wrapping your arms around his front to surprise him.

“Hi, Sweetheart!” he answers happily and quietly, instantly dropping the knife to the counter and turning around in your arms to pull you close to him. “You’re home early!” he whisper-exclaims, and with a kiss to your temple, then asks, “How was your day?”

“Pretty good,” you sigh, letting your body fall limp in his tight grasp, running your hands up and down his strong back. “How was yours?”

“Better now that you’re here,” he murmurs into your ear. “Mmm, I missed you so much.”

This feeling of safety, security… this feeling of love… you’ve never experienced it in this capacity before. To come home to someone telling you they missed you, coming home to unconditional support - it’s something you didn’t know you needed.

You’re so in love with Bucky.

You’re so in love with him, it’s impossible to even describe.

Your only fear is that he doesn’t feel as strongly as you do.

“Missed you, too,” you tilt your head up, resting your chin on his chest to look up at him.

With a bashful grin, Bucky tightens his grasp around your body and pulls you in closer to him, leaning down to meet you for a sweet, delicate kiss on your lips.

“Mm,” you realize it’s a tad too calm as you break away from his lips. “It is far too quiet in this house. Where’s my son?” you laugh lightly.

“He’s napping on the couch,” Bucky chuckles along with you.

“Napping? At four in the afternoon? He gets naptime at school after lunch,” you furrow your eyebrows, wondering how he could still be tired.

“Actually, he seemed a little out of it when I picked him up from school and he kept nodding off in the car ride home. And when we got home, before I could even offer to make him a snack, he had already climbed onto the couch and cuddled up with Alpine,” Bucky explains. “I’ll send you the picture I took.”

“Gosh, this growth spurt. You know, maybe I should start giving him those multivitamins again,” you say, more to yourself than to Bucky. “I wonder if he’s got a deficiency or if he’s coming down with something. Shoot. Do you think I should get him checked out?” you start to worry yourself.

“Sweets, I’m no pediatrician, but if he has no other symptoms, I think you’re right about it being just a growth spurt,” Bucky nods, using his flesh hand to caress your shoulder. “He’s as playful and happy as he normally is. Just a little extra sleepy,” Bucky assures you.

“I guess you’re right,” you chew on your bottom lip.

“Hey, but Sarah was a pediatric nurse for a while,” Bucky brings up, gently rubbing his hands up and down your shoulders.

He wants to comfort you, but he doesn’t want to invalidate your feelings. You have every right to be worried as a mother, and Bucky just wants you to know he’s there for you.

“Sarah…” you trail off, trying to recall where you know that name from.

“Wilson. Sam’s sister. She’s worked in a children’s hospital for at least five years. Maybe we could plan a time to see Sam and Sarah and the two of you could talk, if it will ease your mind,” he suggests meekly.

“It would. Thank you, Bucky,” you nod and smile, feeling your heart swell at his thoughtfulness.

“Of course, Sweetheart,” he coos, pulling you back into his arms, placing a kiss atop your head.

“Hey, so…” you murmur into his chest. ”Nat knows about us now.”

“Nat… Natasha?” he asks to clarify, running his hands over your back. “Miss Romanoff?”

You pull your head up to face him, nodding hesitantly as you try to read his face. Maybe it was a mistake to open up to Nat so quickly about this. Maybe you crossed a boundary.

Great, (Y/n). It hasn’t even been a week since you’ve admitted your feelings and you’ve already jeopardized the relationship.

“Is that okay?” you wonder.

“Of course it’s okay,” Bucky assures you, reaching up to hold your face. “I just know that she’s going to be that much more protective over you now,” he chuckles, and you feel relieved once you see his smile.

“Oh, I bet,” you giggle along with him. ”But she also did offer to watch Jasper for a night if we wanted to go out and… y’know, just do couple-y things,” you trail off into a mutter by the end of your statement.

“What things?” he smiles, directing you to look back at him.

“Couple-y things,” you half frown and half smile, feigning anger that he’s teasing you.

“Oh. And would you wanna go out and do… couple-y things?” he then asks with a smirk.

“Maybe,” you purse your lips, casting your gaze downwards. “Only if you wanted to, too.”

And a switch in him flips; he goes from playful and silly to passionate and serious. He holds your face in his hands and catches your eyes once again.

“I would love to,” he says genuinely, but sees that you’re still pondering something. “What else is on your mind, Sweets?”

“Well… well we kiss and stuff,” you start again shyly.

“Yeah, and I do like kissing you,” he teases softly, punctuating his point with a dainty kiss to your lips.

“But like… what about other stuff?” you trail off, trying to find a more tactful way to talk about sex.

“Other stuff?” he asks, running his flesh thumb over your cheek, not picking up on what you mean..

“Like, just other… uh, intimate stuff,” you answer bashfully.

“Oh,” he nods. “What about it?”

“I just mean that… Well, I promise I’ll try to be comfortable with it, you know… if you need that kinda stuff,” you avert your eyes from his gaze.

“Oh, Sweetheart, absolutely not,” he coos while shaking his head.

“What?” you wonder nervously, turning your head back up to look at him.

“(Y/n),” he sighs, moving his hands from your face to press them flat against your back, keeping you close to him, but at enough of a distance that he can hold your eye contact. “When you’re ready, you’re ready. I’m not going to make you go any quicker than the pace you need, alright?”

“But, Bucky, if you need that—“ you start again, but when you see Bucky shaking his head, you stop talking.

“I don’t,” he states plainly. “(Y/n), I promise I am never going to force you to do anything you’re not one hundred percent comfortable with. We are going to move at your pace. And when you feel you’re ready to take that next step, however long you need to wait and prepare, I will be here. I promise I’m not going anywhere, so please do not feel like you have to rush,” he assures you, running his thumb over your cheek.

“I am ready,” you blurt out, though you’re not sure you mean it.

“When the time is right, it will happen,” he assures you, seeing right through you.

“Alright,” you sigh and give him a timid smile. “Ugh. You’re so nice to me.”

“Well you’re really cute so it’s pretty easy,” he returns, pushing a loose section of your hair behind your ear before kissing your cheek, making your ears burn in embarrassment. “Too cute for your own good,” he then whispers, moving down to press a quick kiss just below your jawline.

Then, he pulls away, letting go of you and turning away to continue cooking.

“Mm, come back,” you groan quietly.

“Dinner,” he whisper-shouts, shooting you a wink before he goes about his business, seasoning the food and tossing it all together in a pan on the stove.

You sigh playfully-dramatically, rolling your eyes before he rolls his eyes back at you as you prance out of the kitchen. Heading into the living room, your eyes fall on the cutest sight: Jasper nuzzled up with Alpine.

You almost don’t want to wake him, but you know that if he sleeps any longer, he won’t go to sleep tonight. And maybe it’s selfish, but you need him to start sleeping better so that you can spend more interrupted time with Bucky.

“Bubba,” you murmur to him, running your hand over his soft cheek, watching as he slowly stirs awake.

“Mama,” he mumbles sleepily, lifting his head from Alpine’s tummy to glance up at you.

“It’s dinner time,” you say gently, lifting him off the couch, so he curls his little legs around your waist and rests his sleepy head on your shoulder.

“What’s for dinner?” he asks, lifting his head to watch as you walk back into the kitchen.

“Why don’t you ask Bucky,” you say, and the man’s ears perk up at the sound of his name from your lips.

“Hiya, Sport,” Bucky greets gently, wiping his hands on a towel before taking the toddler from your arms as you take over his duty at the stove.

“Bucky,” Jasper says in a sleepy, sing-song voice, resting his head back down on Bucky’s shoulder. “What’s f’dinner?”

“Spaghetti,” Bucky coos, placing a protective hand over the back of Jasper’s head and then bouncing him in his arms a little. “That alright with you?”

Good god. Every time you see Jasper in Bucky’s arms, your stomach flutters. The whole scene you’re in - coming home from work to Bucky, trading off the kid, and cooking together - it makes you so happy.

You can’t explain it: it’s so basic, so normal… traditional. But it’s everything you could ever ask for.

“Mhm,” Jasper hums back with a giggle as he lifts his head to look up at the man. “Tummy so hungry.”

“Well, good,” Bucky nods, pulling his own head back to gaze at the little boy. “Wanna taste it and tell me if it’s yummy enough?”

“Yeah!” he perks up, and Bucky sets him down on the kitchen counter before spooning some of the spaghetti out of the pot for Jasper to blow on and then taste.

“How is it? Yum?” Bucky asks, and Jasper just smiles and hums contently, making Bucky chuckle. “Well as long as you approve, Sport.”

You love your two boys.

~~~

The next day, you decide to work from home to be with Jasper, since he doesn’t have school. Bucky leaves early in the morning for his opening shift at the coffee shop, and you don’t expect him to be home until at least past two.

You miss him terribly, since both you and Jasper slept through him leaving, but you know this one on one time with your son is just what he needs, especially after all the change that’s been happening for him. Thankfully, he seems to have adapted well to it all, and it helps that you’re still sleeping in the same room, although you hope to change that. And soon.

You love your son more than words can say, but you have an inclination that Bucky may just be a better roommate. But of course, you don’t know how he’d feel about sharing a bed, even though the two of you are - kind of - together now. So you settle for now, and figure that when the right time comes, you’ll know.

After lunch, Jasper takes to playing with some blocks. You’re down on the floor playing with him for a while, but eventually cuddle up on the couch with Alpine. She seems to be your cuddle buddy in place of Bucky when he’s away.

“Mama, look’it!” your son says excitedly.

“Very cool, Bubba,” you giggle and nod, watching as he places yet another Jenga block on top of the other three, stacking them long ways up.

You’re actually impressed with the stillness of hand he has to balance them on the small ends. His motor skills are developing pretty quickly the more and more he grows curious and explores new things. But his calmness comes to an abrupt interruption when he hears the front door click open.

“Bucky!” he calls, letting his blocks clatter to the floor as his little legs take him over to the entryway as quickly as they can.

“Hey, Sport!” you hear Bucky greet with a laugh and a grunt as Jasper makes contact with him.

“What’s this for?” Jasper’s little voice wonders, piquing your interest in what he’s asking about.

“For your Mama,” you hear him answer quietly. “Shh, it’s a surprise, though.”

And now, you’re really curious.

But your curiosity is quickly satiated when Bucky comes into your line of vision carrying Jasper on his hip and a stunning bouquet of pink, peach, white, and purple flowers in his opposite hand.

A brawny, six foot four, bearded man with a little boy in one arm and colourful flowers in the other. What a sight.

“Hey,” you greet nonchalantly, praying it’s not selfish of you to hope the flowers are for you.

“Hey, Sweetheart,” he smiles back bashfully, and as you stand up to meet him, Jasper wiggles out of his arm to continue building with his blocks.

Your eyes dart down to the bundle of beautiful flowers, and although you try not to make it obvious, Bucky sees.

“Uh, these… They’re for you,” the man says, then leans in to kiss your cheek. And you can almost feel the shake in his hands as he gives you the flowers.

“Oh, Bucky,” you fawn, gazing down at the flowers. “They’re so lovely. Thank you. But, what are they for?” your question, accompanied by a giggle, mimics your son’s as you turn your attention back up to Bucky.

“Uh, well,” Bucky starts, and his cheeks go pink as he grows nervous. “I wouldn’t dare ask you out without flowers.”

“Bucky,” you smile and hum. You cannot believe how precious he is.

“Ugh, wait… That’s no way to ask you out,” he scolds himself, internally cringing at the lack of suaveness that he’d even practiced on the drive home.

You think back to when the two of you first met at the park all those months ago. His staggered invitation of asking you out right now is almost exactly the same as that.

“Bucky,” you say again, reaching one arm around his neck and bringing your body close to his, positioning the flowers outwards so that you don’t crush them, and you watch as he composes himself.

He grabs your hand from around him and instead holds it with the utmost gentleness against his chest, gazing longingly into your eyes as he takes in a deep breath, then exhales.

“(Y/n), would you like to go out to dinner sometime?” he finally asks softly, yet with the confidence you know he holds deep down.

“Just the two of us?” you ask bashfully, wondering if he means this to be like a date.

“Just the two of us,” he confirms.

“Like… a couple?” your question comes with a small giggle, nodding to the conversation that you two shared the other day.

“Like a couple, pretty girl,” his head quirks to the side, knowing exactly what you’re referencing. With another small laugh, you press yourself up into your tiptoes to leave a dainty kiss on his lips.

“I would absolutely love to go out to dinner with you, James,” you whisper after pulling away.

“Phew,” he exhales, letting the tension drop from his shoulders. “I really thought I biffed my chances there.”

“You could never,” you shake your head and chuckle as he leans down to kiss you again. “Let me get these in some water.” you whisper, gesturing with the flowers as you break away from him.

“Do you like them?” he asks timidly, watching as you make your way into the kitchen.

“Bucky, I love them. Thank you so much. They’re so gorgeous,” you tell him.

“Not as gorgeous as you,” he winks, and you playfully roll your eyes at him.

“So…” you start, struggling to reach the vase off the top shelf of the pantry as Bucky walks over into the kitchen to meet you. “Did you have a night in mind?”

“For dinner, you mean?” he asks, barely reaching up and easily grabbing the vase for you.

“Thank you,” you giggle as he hands it to you, then you make your way to the kitchen sink to fill it with water. “Yeah, for dinner. Did you have a specific night you wanted to go out?”

“How about Saturday? Think Nat will be willing and able to watch the little guy for the evening?” Bucky wonders.

“I can almost guarantee it,” you smile, turning off the faucet and slipping the flowers into their new home. “I’ll shoot her a text tonight to ask. But in the meantime…” you hum, placing the vase on the dining room table while pulling Bucky with you back into the living room. “I’m in desperate need of some cuddles.”

Bucky laughs quietly but obliges, pulling you down onto the couch to lay on top of him, immediately taking you into his protective embrace.

“That makes two of us, Sweets,” he murmurs as he kisses the top of your head, and the two of you are perfectly content to lay there watching as Jasper continues with his Jenga block architecture.

~~~

Eventually, you text Nat, and the conversation, as always, goes absolutely perfect. She is so supportive of you and you seriously don’t know what you’d do without her.

You and Bucky end up deciding to go out to dinner on Saturday around seven. Bucky made reservations for some fancy place and told you it would be a surprise. But what he doesn’t know is that you hope to surprise him, too, by letting him know that you’re ready to take the next step in your relationship, and taking advantage of having the house to yourselves.

Even though Bucky said he’d wait as long as you need to for you to be ready, you know he has to be longing for more. You know that the lingering touches and the heated kisses aren’t enough to fulfill his desires. You notice how uncomfortably he walks away after a heated makeout session, and you no longer think it’s a coincidence that his showers just so happen to be a little longer after those makeouts.

You can’t blame him, though. He is a man, after all.

And although you want to let him know that you’re grateful for his patience, you’re also just as desperate. You want to have a deeper, physical connection with Bucky, and you don’t want him to feel like he has to tiptoe around you. You need him just as bad. If not, worse.

~~~

When Saturday night rolls around, both of you are buzzing in anticipation for your very first ‘date’. It may not seem like much to an outsider, but if they only knew what the both of you had gone through to get to this point, they’d understand how meaningful this night is.

A little earlier in the evening, you drop off a bubbling Jasper off at Nat’s with the promise to pick him up the next day, somewhere around noon. But you don’t know how you’re going to spend the time alone with Bucky after dinner, so you can’t exactly plan for the morning after.

By the time you return from dropping off Jasper so that you and Bucky have time alone to prepare for your date, your nerves have only amplified. So you try to channel your nerves in a different way, attempting to push forward the confidence that’s been shoved deep down inside of you.

In passing, you see Bucky fresh out of the shower and getting ready in his room. The smell of his body wash and shampoo fills your lungs and pulls you in, unable to resist him. He’s staring at himself in the mirror: practicing smiling, puffing his chest forward, then rolling his eyes and scoffing at himself.

“Do I get to know where we’re going to eat yet,” you wonder, popping your head into the bedroom just enough to catch a glimpse of Bucky standing in front of the mirror, clearly checking himself out.

“Gosh, Honey—“ is all he says, along with a startled gasp as he turns around to face you, clearly a tad embarrassed, and unintentionally showing off just a peek of his rigid abs under the white dress shirt he has yet to button up.

“Or is it still a surprise?” you smile, unable to keep your eyes from drifting down to his midsection.

“It’s a surprise,” he winks, buttoning up his shirt, then tucking it into his fitted, navy slacks before reaching his arms out for you to come to him.

“You look really handsome,” you ogle up at him.

“Thank you,” he blushes, then kisses your forehead.

“I still gotta change, but I’ll be quick, I promise,” you tell him, breaking away from his hold.

“Take all the time you need, Sweetheart. Reservations aren’t for another hour and a half. We’re in no rush,” he assures you.

“Easy for you to say. You always look that good,” you roll your eyes.

“Stop,” he blushes a deeper red. “You do, too. Always look perfect,” he affectionately scolds you.

“We’ll see,” you hum, stepping out of his room and instead going down the hall to the room you and Jasper have been staying in.

Once you get to your closet, you grab the dress you’d mentally picked out ever since Bucky first asked you to dinner, along with a new lingerie set you’re still debating whether or not to wear.

You don’t want to assume anything about tonight, but you feel like it may end with some more intimate activities, considering you and Bucky will have the entire evening and morning to yourselves. At least, you hope that’s how it will go.

And, you’ve let Bucky know that you’re ready to take the next step, although he still doesn’t want to rush you. You really, really appreciate that about him, but you also just need him in a deeper way.

As you get yourself dressed and ready, though, you find that your nerves only heighten.

What if things don’t go as smoothly as you hope? What if Bucky doesn’t want to take the next step with you? What if he does, but you choke and can’t go through with it and ruin the night?

You shake your head, trying to rid your mind of these thoughts to focus on finishing getting ready.

After staring way too long at your lace-clad body in the mirror, you finally slip into your dress. Then, you sneak to the bathroom down the hall to finish your look by applying just a tiny bit of makeup so as to not go overboard with changing your look entirely.

This dress isn’t something you’re normally used to wearing, but Nat assured you that you’re drop dead gorgeous in it when you asked for her opinion over facetime. It covers your body in the most flattering way: accentuating the parts you love and staying modest with the parts you don’t.

You’re not sure how Bucky will react, since you’re pretty sure the only things he’s seen you wear are casual clothes, sweats, or your work clothes - which aren’t too fancy, either - so you’re anxious to see his reaction. You assume he’s also dressing up a little more than normal for the occasion, and although you didn’t want to go overboard, you tried to do the same in choosing this dress.

“I’ll be downstairs whenever you’re ready, Sweets,” Bucky’s voice comes from the other side of the bathroom door along with a gentle set of knocks, startling you.

“Almost done!” you let him know, hoping you’re not taking too long.

“No worries, Honey,” he chuckles. “Take your time.”

And you’re just dying to see him again, wondering how he’s chosen to complete his outfit. He’s so insanely handsome, sometimes it’s hard to convince yourself that he’s actually attracted to you.

But tonight, you try to shuck those doubts to the side. He obviously is attracted to you, and you need to feel confident in that.

After one last dabble of makeup, you take one more glance at yourself in the mirror, making sure you like the way you look. Then, you grab your shoes from the bedroom before you make your way down to find Bucky.

From the top of the stairs, you hear his voice. He’s talking to someone, but you’re not sure who, until you hear the context of the one-sided conversation.

As you carefully pad down the stairs, the two cuties come into your line of vision. Bucky’s hunched over the back of the couch while Alpine lounges on the top, happily getting some scratches.

“Can’t cuddle right now, girlie. M’sorry,” Bucky coos to the cat. “Your white fur’ll get all over my clothes. Gotta stay lookin’ nice for my date.”

Alpine lets out a little mewl, as if to respond to her human father.

“Yeah,” Bucky hums. “Gonna take her out to dinner. Hope she likes where I take her.”

Alpine meows again.

“I know, I know. Can I tell you a secret, though?” Bucky asks, then lowers his voice to a whisper, as if he’s actually sharing a secret with the furry friend. “I’m a little nervous,” he admits, stroking her soft back, and Alpine gives her opinion one last time before you finally interject.

“Don’t worry, Alpine,” you make your presence known to the man. “I’m nervous, too.”

And in a second, Bucky’s gaze shifts from the white cat over to you, just stepping down off the last stair. His jaw drops, his eyes nearly pop out of his head, and he swears he may be sent straight into cardiac arrest.

“(Y/n),” he gasps, standing up straight from the couch, staring at you so intensely that it makes you worry if there’s a tear or a stain on your clothes or something wrong with how you look.

“What? Do I look alright?” you ask nervously, casting your vision down to yourself, smoothing out the fabric of your dress.

“Oh my god, (Y/n),” he says, walking towards you and gazing at you as if you’re the only source of light in the middle of darkness.

“What?” you ask again, only growing more anxious under his unfaltering stare.

“(Y/n), you’re so…“ he trails off, unable to form a proper sentence. But when you bring your eyes back up to meet his, giving him a timid, worried smile, he swallows thickly, then finds his words. “You… you’re breathtaking,” he whispers.

“Thank you, Bucky,” you shakily exhale the breath you didn’t even realize you were holding, then look him up and down.

He, too, is truly a sight to behold: dark, curly hair styled just right atop his head, lush beard freshly trimmed and dabbed with some insanely good scented after-shave, and his complete outfit of a navy blue sport coat with a crisp white dress shirt underneath, the top few buttons left undone, matching navy pants, and some black, recently shined shoes. He looks insanely good.

“Weird to see me dressed up, right?” he jokes after catching the way you check him out.

But you shake your head and take a step closer, placing your hands on his shoulders to press yourself up and connect your lips to his, thankful you opted for a lip balm instead of a staining lipstick.

“James, you look really handsome,” you murmur just inches from his lips.

“You think so?” he asks insecurely, wrapping his hands around you to link them together behind your back.

“Uh, yeah!” you whisper-shout, squeezing his shoulders. “Did you mean what you said? About being nervous, I mean?” you then ask sympathetically, rubbing where you just squeezed.

“Of course,” he shrugs. “I mean, look’t you. You make my knees weak,” he chuckles bashfully, then grows shy again. “Are you… actually nervous too?” he asks, wondering if you were just saying it because he said it first.

“Very,” you nod and exhale shakily, and his grip around you only tightens when he hears your confession.

“Oh, Sweets. You don’t need to be,” he coos, reaching his flesh hand up to hold your face. “We’re gonna have a great time,” he assures you.

“No, I know,” you nod and smile, then swallow thickly. “I‘ve just never… I’ve never been on a date before.”

“Never?” he asks, almost in disbelief.

You shake your head to confirm your statement and avert your eyes from his, slightly embarrassed at the confession. But you know he’s not judging you; instead, he’s just glad you trust him enough, especially considering all you’ve been through.

“Well,” he starts, ever so softly adjusting your chin so that you’re looking directly at him again. “If this is your very first date, then I’m absolutely honored that you’ve chosen for it to be with me, Sweetheart.”

“I couldn’t ever want anyone else,” you whisper back, letting him leave another soft kiss to your lips.

“Shall we go?” he smiles, grabbing your hand and kissing your knuckles.

“Please,” you hum. “Wanna show you off.”

“Oh yeah?” he raises his eyebrows in amusement, chuckling at your statement. “Could say the same about you, pretty girl. Gosh, you’re so beautiful. Can't believe you’re mine.”

“Better believe it, Barnes,” you smile, letting him guide you to the front door.

He helps you into your jacket, and the two of you bid your goodbyes to Alpine - she’s already settled into the couch cushions - before heading out to the car.

Ever the gentleman, Bucky opens the car door for you, then shuts it gently once you’re in.

Not more than a few moments pass before Bucky’s pulling out of the driveway and the two of you are heading to your very first date.

~~~

Dinner goes wonderfully.

Bucky takes you to the fancy Italian restaurant you’d offhandedly mentioned you wanted to try, one time, weeks ago, even before the two of you were ‘official’. You’re surprised he even remembered it, but you’ve grown to understand that Bucky makes a note of all your favorite things.

This, along with countless other instances, simply proves to you just how much Bucky cares for you. You’re not used to being cared for in this way, but it feels so good. Bucky makes you feel other worldly.

Picking up on the romantic mood, the waiter offers you and Bucky the spirits menu. But in alignment with your personal vow of sobriety, you politely decline. Bucky does, too, even though you tell him that he can get something if he wants. You don’t want him to decline just because you do. But he insists he doesn’t mind.

Instead, the waiter shares about the restaurant’s non-alcoholic wines, and asks if you’d like to try any of that. You’ve never had wine of any kind, even alcohol free, simply because you intended to stay away from it all. However, one sticks out to you from the list; it sounds really good, and you think you want to try it.

Bucky insists that you get whatever you want, and after some playful banter, once the waiter comes back you do order some. Not long after, the waiter returns with a bottle and two wine glasses. He pours you each a glass, then leaves the bottle at the table for the two of you to self serve when needed.

“To first dates,” Bucky raises his glass to initiate a ‘cheers’.

“And to plenty more in the future,” you smile, clinking your glass to his. “Hopefully,” you then tack on.

“Oh you can bet on it, Sweetheart,” he shoots you a suave smile and wink.

The attentive waiter takes your food orders shortly after, and the time in between his stops at your table is filled with nothing but giddy conversation between you and Bucky.

By the time the food comes, both of you think that the other’s looks better, so you end up switching plates.

Everything feels so right. Like you’ve been doing this forever. In fact, you wish you could have been doing it forever. But you trust the universe’s timing of bringing Bucky into this point of your life. Everything happens for a reason, and maybe Bucky’s your reason.

When the two of you have finished off your meals, the waiter comes around to offer the dessert menu. And even despite the fact that both you and Bucky say you’re full, you give in an order a serving of cannoli to share.

And as if straight out of a cheesy romance film, Bucky forks off a piece of the dessert and offers it to your lips. You can’t help but giggle bashfully at the gesture, but accept it all the same, and when the flavor hits your tongue, you let out a sound of delight.

“Any good?” Bucky asks.

“It’s fantastic,” you tell him, watching as he then takes a bite for himself.

And just as you had, he lets out a noise of pleasure at the dessert’s delicious taste.

It takes no more than five minutes before the two of you have finished up, and the very attentive waiter has returned with the bill.

Immediately, Bucky reaches for the small paper, picking up on the fact that you’d been eyeing it, too. But he doesn’t let you even entertain the thought of paying. He takes out his wallet from his jacket and promptly hands the waiter his card.

“Bucky, what do I owe you?” you ask, but he shakes his head in refusal.

“Nothing. No way. It’s our first date. Call me traditional, but I believe that it’s my job to pay,” he teases, although you can sense some genuinity in his tone, too.

“It’s the twenty-first century, Barnes. Women can pay on first dates, too,” you tease right back.

“I know. But I asked you out. So I should be the one paying,” he finishes the last of the wine in his glass.

“I guess that makes sense,” you reason, admiring the way he makes even the simplest of actions seem so attractive. “But that just means I’m gonna be the one to ask you out next,” you smile at him.

“Not if I ask you out first,” Bucky smirks, thanking the waiter when he returns with the card and two receipts, one of which he signs his name on, then slips his card back into his wallet, and his wallet back into his pocket.

“You’re gonna make this hard for me, aren’t you?” you giggle, your eyes following as Bucky stands up, then walks over to you. He holds out his arm and you accept, holding onto him as you stand up and walk towards the door together.

“It’s a possibility,” he smirks, parting from you only to hold open the door to the restaurant for you. Then, he grabs your hand again, and leads you to the car.

~~~

The ride home is pretty quiet, but it’s a comfortable silence. The radio plays softly as background noise, and about halfway through the ride, Bucky’s hand lazily wanders to rest on your thigh, just above your knee.

Your heart and tummy both flutter when he makes the move at a red light; he looks over at you unsurely at first, but when you smile and place your hand over his, interlocking your fingers atop his, he squeezes your knee gently.

No words are exchanged in this interaction, but the two of you know what you want to communicate: both of you are touch starved for the other. And you know it can’t from the wine you consumed since it was nonalcoholic, but something inside you is buzzing.

Something inside you is yearning for Bucky. And something inside Bucky is longing for you, too.

Both of you just need to admit it.

#bucky barnes #sebastian stan #james buchanan barnes #bucky barnes series #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes x reader #the winter soldier #marvel #avengers #the white wolf #the road goes ever on and on

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everydaydollydomes · 6 months

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It's been a while since I've posted an update - motivation has unfortunately been a struggle to gather but I got hit with a lot of it today! Haven't done a test print of these, yet, but I've got a cover for my printer so I should be able to do at least one this weekend. Most likely of the GamePal. I've made some adjustments to the magnet locations and added my shop name, also added the console 'logo' name to the front of the head. I also made the D-pad a little larger and I think I succeeded at making the internal space a bit bigger. We'll have to wait and see how the S-hook fits.

The Meecrowahvey still needs a lot of work - but 3D Builder has hit the point where everything I try to do just stalls out the program for what feels like forever - cancelling merges or removals or anything like that. I waited at one point for like an hour before giving up and restarting the program. Luckily I didn't lose too much progress when that happened. Trying to build a magnet hinge based on the suggestion/schematic a friend suggested (that pole is kind of part of the build for it, but that's around when 3D Builder really started giving me problems). We'll see how it goes, but I think it'll be more successful than the last hinge I tried. I mostly rebuilt this one from scratch and went back to my original idea of creating two separate chambers for the S-hook/microwave plate. It's likely going to be a bit front heavy but I think it'll print a bit nicer than that last one did without the extra pieces that failed the first time.

I've also sketched out a concept for my own body. While my heads are primarily designed to be compatible with Kabbits, using the DIY neck piece and being a member of Aelith Art's patreon, I would eventually like to sculpt my own doll from top to bottom. It's just a rough concept for now (I really need to draw people from the side more often lmao) but it'll give you an idea of what I've got in mind.

#everyday updates #bjd head #bjd #doll #ball jointed doll #ball jointed dolls #dolls #3d print #bjddoll #wip

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spaceoddball1969 · 1 year

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Teach Me - Part 1

Ok, so here we go. I’m not sure exactly where this is going to go. With Falling for the Freak I at least could follow the plot line of ST4. But this time man, this time it’s a free for all. I am feeling good about this one. It’s again, going to be the slow burn of all slow burns. I hope y’all enjoy it! Also I cannot promise how often I’ll be able to update this as I am trying to graduate college at the moment.

P.S. let me know if you want to be tagged

PLOT SUMMARY: The reader has just moved to Hawkins after getting a new job as the music teacher at the high school. Steve is the reader’s cousin and reccommended she apply for the position. This takes place in what would be like Dustin, Mike, and Lucas’ senior year or high school. So the reader and Eddie are about 24 years old. And for the sake of this story, ST4 never happened. The gang lived happily ever after and Vecna never made an appearance.

WARNINGS: Fluff, and some mild making out. It’s not quite smut but there will be smut eventually so if you’re a minor you probably shouldn’t even start reading this. Also mentions of shitty relationships and anxiety.

Part 1

I had just finished my first week on the job as Hawkins High School’s newest staff member. I was teaching high school music....or at least trying to. Hawkins wasn’t a very musically inclined community. I had fourteen dedicated singers in my choir, about twenty in my band, and a bored looking eight students in my general music class. It was going to be a rough start, but I figured I could get the program back to what it should be.

All that to say that I needed to blow off some steam on my first weekend off. I decided to spend Saturday with myself and explore my new home. My cousin Steve had sold Hawkins to me by saying it may be a quiet community, but the shopping downtown made up for it. For the most part, Steve’s description was incorrect. I thought I had struck out by 12:00pm when I stumbled across a small record store.

A small bell hanging above the door announced my entrance. The interior of the shop smelled like old records and dust. It was one of my favorite scents. There was nobody in the store but myself, not even a clerk at the counter. I began roaming through the aisles and aisles of records, CD’s, and tapes. I found a small corner in the back that was marked ‘Choir’ and started shuffling through. There were some surprisingly great finds on tape for more than reasonable prices as they were used.

I grabbed a handful of tapes of various choral arrangements and made my way to the counter. There still wasn’t any kind of clerk around, but there was a silver bell on the counter. I tapped my finger on it and it rang out through the store.

Soon enough, a young man was pushing his way through the black curtains behind the counter. He was tall and skinny, dressed in ripped black jeans and a faded purple Black Sabbath T-shirt. His fluffy brown hair fell in waves down to his shoulders and he looked up at me with large chocolate colored eyes.

“Hey there, how’s it going?” he asked, casually, looking me up and down.

“Good, yourself?” I asked, trying not to notice the way his eyes paused on certain parts of my body.

“Not too bad,” he shrugged. The man picked up the tapes one by one and started to scan them. “This stuff was in the store?” he asked.

“Yes?” I asked. “They were in the back corner over there,”

“Huh,” he said. “Didn’t realize there was any choir stuff still in stock,”

“I might have gotten the rest of it,” I said.

“You a big fan of choral music?” he asked.

“I kinda have to be,” I said, “I teach it over at the high school. Just finished my first week,”

“You’re a teacher?” he asked, setting down one of the tapes.

“Yes,” I said, proudly. “Is there something wrong with that?”

“No,” the man said, shaking his head, sending his curls flying. “No, it’s not that. It’s just, we didn’t have teachers that looked like you when I was in high school,”

“Oh no?” I asked, allowing myself to fall into a more flirtatious spirit. “What did they look like when you were in high school,”

“Ugh,” he gagged, “they were old and wrinkled and had gray hair. And I swear at least three of my teachers had warts on the ends of their noses like the witch in Snow White.”

“Wow that must’ve been rough,” I said, taking my wallet out of my bag and handing him a stack of bills for my tapes.

“It was awful,” he said, “but I don’t know if I’d be able to pay attention if they looked like you,” The cash register jumped open and he put my money away. He pulled out a few bills for my change and handed them over. “Two dollars and twenty four cents is your change, my lady,”

“Thank you, kind sir,” I giggled.

“Have a good one,” he smiled. “And definitely come again,”

“We’ll see,” I said with a smirk and walked out of a store.

If there was one thing I knew how to do, it was flirt. And man had it felt good to flirt. I had been trying to get myself back into the whole dating groove after a rough break up. My boyfriend of almost three years had decided that there was something better out there for him than a stable lifestyle with me and had up and left about six months ago. That was partially how I ended up in Hawkins. I needed a fresh start. It seemed like Hawkins might be exactly what I needed.

---

After a little over a month in Hawkins, I hadn’t been able to get the time to go back to the record store to pursue the handsome clerk further. My job was just keeping me too busy. Between scheduling and planning three courses; ordering music; parent teacher conferences; and grading, I was a busy bee. I barely had time to eat let alone flirt with a cute stranger.

However, one night, I found myself sitting at home on a Saturday evening with nothing to do. I had just settled in and decided to order some take out when my phone rang.

“Y/N?” Steve asked in the speaker.

“Yeah?” I asked.

“I have a big favor to ask you,” he said. I could hear the desperation in his voice.

“What is it?” I asked.

“I got called into work last minute, somebody’s sick or something, I don’t know,” he started, talking a mile a minute. “But anyway, I was supposed to get my friend, Dustin, over to his Dungeons and Dragons meeting tonight. He’ll die if he can’t go, so I was wondering if you could drive him?”

Dustin Henderson was actually one of my students. He was one of the fourteen dedicated choral singers that I had. If I was being honest, he was probably one of my favorite students. But to pick him up and drive him somewhere? Was that crossing a line? It wasn’t school hours. And he was Steve’s friend. I had known that they were friends for a while. Dustin had come up to me one day after rehearsal and asked if I knew Steve since we have the same last name. But still, would it be too weird?

“Steve, I don’t know,” I said. “he’s one of my students. Wouldn’t that be weird?”

“But he’s also my friend,” Steve said, “And you’re my cousin, so he’s like your friend through me,”

“Where am I even taking him?” I asked.

“They’re meeting at the record store downtown. The guy who own’s the place runs their club,” Steve said.

My ears perked up at that information. The record store downtown. Maybe if I dropped Dustin off at the store I would have a chance to flirt a little more.

“Oh, and Dustin is going home with Mike afterwards so you would only have to drop him off,” Steve said.

I was sold.

“Tell him I’ll be there soon,” I said.

Once I got Dustin’s address I hung up the phone and was stowed away in my small bathroom. I brushed my hair, applied a fresh layer or mascara and lip gloss and sprayed a puff of perfume against my neck.

The ride from Dustin’s house to the record store was awkward to say the least. We made small talk but not much else. We talked mostly about choir, which was fun, but I was relieved when we finally pulled into a parking space in front of the record store.

“Eddie said the door should be unlocked,” Dustin said as we approached the store.

The bell rang with a familiar clang and then I could hear voices coming from behind the curtain.

“Eddie?” Dustin called.

“Up here, Henderson!” a voice called back.

“You don’t have to stay,” Dustin said. “I appreciate the ride, Miss Harrington,”

“Oh it’s ok,” I said. “I want to make sure you get where you’re supposed to be,”

Together, we pushed through the black velvet curtains behind the counter and climbed a thin set of wooden stairs. The steps led up to a door that was open. Music and the smell of food wafted from the open doorway. The lights where dim in the upstairs apartment and there was a crowd of young men sitting around a table. At the head of the table sat a particularly good looking young man in a throne fit for a king. It was the clerk from a month ago.

“Henderson! You finally made it!” he called, standing from his seat. “And who’s this?” he asked and then recognized me. “Wait, hey, I know you. You’re the teacher,”

“Hi,” I said.

“Wait, you know each other?” Dustin asked.

“Barely,” I said. “I was here buying some choir tapes a while back,”

“And I haven’t seen you since,” Eddie asked, taking a step closer. “Did I scare you away?”

“Not at all,” I said. “Definitely would take much more to frighten me,”

“Noted. I’m Eddie Munson by the way. I own the shop and this here apartment,” Eddie said, holding out his hand for me to shake. “You’re staying right?”

“Y/N Harrington, I’m Steve’s cousin,” I said, shaking his hand. “And no, I really can’t stay” I said.

“Oh come on, you have to,” Eddie said. “Make up for all that time you lost by not coming back to the store,”

“I don’t even know how to play D and D,” I said.

“I’ll teach you,” Eddie said, grabbing my hand and dragging me over to the empty chair next to the throne.

I wanted to protest but the way his hand felt in mine made my brain a little fuzzy. I sat down and watched as the boys gathered around the table. I quickly learned that Eddie was the Dungeon Master. I wasn’t quite sure why, but the name made my stomach churn a little bit. Eddie explained the basics of D and D to me as he led the other boys through their campaign. They were too far into this particular campaign for me to join in, but it was still fun getting to see them work through the story.

The campaign was a long one, but it felt like the night went by in a flash. Before I knew it, the boys were packing up and parents were arriving to pick up their sons. Dustin reminded me that he would not be needing a ride because he was staying at Mike’s that night. I stayed behind in the apartment as Eddie led his guests down the stairs and out of the store. I heard the bell ring and the lock click into place. Soon enough Eddie was back in the apartment with me and I was highly aware that we were alone.

He strode over to his throne and sprawled himself into it. I slowly walked around the chair, allowing my fingers to drag over the surface. Once I had rounded it, I leaned against the table and looked down at Eddie.

“You know,” I said, “I was doing an inventory of the high school’s prop room for the drama department. And it just so happens that we’re missing a throne,”

“Is that so?” he asked, “I wonder how that happened,”

“Yeah, it certainly is a mystery,” I said.

Eddie stared at me for a moment and then smirked. “Do you want a drink? I love those guys but man high schoolers are exhausting,”

“I really shouldn’t,” I said.

“Y/N,” he said, “your students are gone. Live a little,”

I didn’t need to be told twice. Soon enough, Eddie and I were sat on his couch, sipping on glasses of cheap whiskey. It was all he had but it tasted just right. I could feel the drink slipping into my bloodstream and up to my brain. It was just enough to make my inhibitions go away. We talked for what must have been hours but felt like only a few minutes.

“You like being a teacher?” Eddie asked.

“Can I say something horrendously corny?” I asked.

“Of course,” Eddie smiled.

“I love it so much I constantly feel like I’m dreaming,” I said. “I mean don’t get me wrong, it is so much work and some days I am so stressed out that I think I could blow up, but it is my actual dream teaching those kids,”

Eddie was quiet for a moment and then smiled. “I was hoping you’d say that,” Eddie said. “God, I wish I had a teacher like you,”

“Eddie Munson, are you flirting with me?” I asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

“It’s possible,” Eddie said. “But I do actually wish that I had a single teacher who enjoyed their job when I was in school,”

We got quiet for a moment. Then Eddie looked up at me with a soft expression on his face.

“I like talking with you,” he said.

“I like talking with you too,” I replied.

He looked me straight in the face for another moment and then leaned forward quickly to press a soft kiss to my mouth. I could hardly believe what had happened. I didn’t do this. I wasn’t someone who just got kissed by people that I hadn’t at least gone on a date with yet. Eddie pulled back just as quickly as he had approached and he looked a little embarrassed.

“That was uncalled for,” he said. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to push you,”

I looked up at him suddenly. He was mistaking my silence for not wanting to kiss him. I couldn’t think of any words to say, so instead I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his. He pulled away and looked at me, shocked.

“Yeah?” he asked.

“Yes,” I said, nodding my head.

Eddie’s hands drifted to either side of my face and he pulled me into another kiss. I melted into him. Eddie kissed me over and over again, pulling me closer with each kiss. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and allowed him to swing my leg over his lap. I straddled him, holding desperately to his broad shoulders for support.

Eddie’s hands were all over me. They roamed down my neck, over my arms and then gripped at my waist. He held me close as his mouth began to wander. I felt his lips burn a trail down my neck and then soon enough his fingers were fumbling at the buttons on the front of my blouse. I gasped as I could feel his fingers through the fabric of my top. My body started to shake and I thought I was going to faint from the sudden rush of images flashing through my mind.

I saw myself in this same position with someone else, kissing and grinding against them desperately. I saw them above in me in bed, their hair in their face and their eyes dreamy from the sight of me. I felt his hands on my body, his lips against mine, I felt his breath on my skin. And then I heard his words in my head.

“I just can’t do this anymore,”

And that was when I froze in Eddie’s arms. Eddie stopped kissing me. He removed his hands from my blouse and settled one on my waist while the other brushed the hair away from my face.

“Hey,” he said, stroking my cheek with his thumb. “hey, are you ok?”

“Uh-um, uh..” I stuttered. I couldn’t get words to come out of my mouth. My eyes were stinging and my throat felt tight. “I uh, I should go,”

“Huh?” Eddie asked, confused.

I stood up from his lap and buttoned the single button he had managed to undo. I started frantically looking for my things. Eddie stood up and began following me around, trying to get me to settle. I was nearly to the door when I felt a strong hand grip mine.

“Hey,” Eddie said. “This is not me trying to get you to stay so we can have sex. You just seem really not ok right now. What’s going on? Did I do something wrong?”

I stared at him for a moment and shook my head. I didn’t know how to speak anymore aparently.

“Can we talk for a minute?” Eddie said. “I don’t feel confident about you getting home right now,”

I nodded and allowed him to bring me back over to the couch.

“Can you tell me what happened?” he asked.

I paused. “I haven’t done this in a while.” I said. “At least, not with someone new.” Eddie looked at me expectantly, waiting for me to go on. “Have you ever been abandoned?” I asked.

Eddie’s eyes got dark and vacant. He nodded.

“I got abandoned,” I said. “I was with a guy for a long long time. It seemed like we were headed towards forever and then one day he just up and left. And I guess, being here with you, with someone new, it just was a bit much. I couldn’t get his words out of my brain,”

“Do you mind if I ask what he was saying?” Eddie asked. “In your brain,”

“He was saying that he just couldn’t do this anymore. Meaning us,” I said. “Meaning me,” I added after a pause.

Eddie was quiet. “I’m sorry,” he said.

“No, I’m sorry,” I said. “I feel like I led you on. I haven’t exactly been shy about my interest in you and now that we actually can do something I freak out. You must think I’m crazy,”

“I don’t think you’re crazy,” Eddie said, taking my hand. “But I don’t think you’re ready for any wild hook ups,” He added with a smirk.

“Gee, what gave it away?” I laughed bitterly.

“That doesn’t mean that we can’t spend time together,” Eddie said.

“What?” I asked.

“I meant it when I said I like talking to you,” he said, squeezing my hand. “I really want to get to know you. I don’t just want to hook up with you one time and call it good. I want to know who you are. And if it takes time then it takes time. I’m not really in a rush for anything,”

I looked at his hand wrapped around mine. It looked huge. But it was warm and calloused and reassuring. My gaze lifted to his face and I could have lost myself in his brown eyes. I let out a small sigh and shook my head.

“What is it?” he asked.

“It’s nothing,” I said. “It’s just, you’re so much kinder than I thought you would be,”

Eddie smirked. “Well, don’t go telling everybody, otherwise it’ll ruin my tough, manly image.” He chuckled. “But I’m serious about you. You lead and I’ll follow at whatever pace you want to go at,”

I thought about it for a minute. “Ok,” I said, a smile growing across my lips. “I think I like that idea,”

“Good,” Eddie said. “Do you want to crash here tonight? I still don’t know how I feel about you driving home, especially after the whiskeys,”

“That would be nice,” I said.

“I can take the couch,” Eddie said. “You can have my bed. Unless you don’t mind me being there,”

“How about I take the couch?” I asked, answering his question without admitting I wasn’t sure about us being in the same bed. “I don’t want to rob you of your bed,”

“It’s not much,” Eddie said with a laugh. “You really wouldn’t be robbing me of anything spectacular,”

“It’s ok,” I said.

Eddie nodded and then went to grab blankets from a closet down the hall. He set me up with a pillow and blankets and then showed me where the bathroom was. Before walking to his own room, he stopped and said, “If you need anything just come get me. My room is down the hall,”

“Ok,” I nodded, organizing my clothes into a pile on a spare chair. Eddie had given me a T-shirt to sleep in which basically functioned as a nightgown on me. I climbed under the blankets on the couch just as Eddie turned out the light.

The blankets, the shirt, the couch, it all smelled like him. It was musky but not so strong that it made my nose burn. It was just enough to recognize as his scent. I pulled the blankets close to my body and closed my eyes, willing myself to sleep. It wouldn’t come. I was restless from the anxiety that had come over me earlier. I also couldn’t stop my body from feeling like it was cheated of something tonight. If I could have remained calm then maybe I wouldn’t feel so unsatisfied. I knew mentally I couldn’t have gone through with it, but my body didn’t understand that. I rolled back and forth for what seemed like hours, frustrated that I wasn’t falling asleep faster. My whole body felt tense and strung out. I pulled the blankets over my head and breathed in Eddie’s scent. Suddenly I felt the muscles in my body relax. I let out a long breath and inhaled the scent again. It was intoxicating in the best way. It calmed me down.

Then I was struck with an idea. It seemed so strong and right that I knew I had to follow through with it. I gathered up my blankets and my pillow and shuffled to Eddie’s door. I didn’t knock. Instead I turned the knob slowly and let myself in. The bedroom was small, mostly taken up by a bed in the back corner. I could see Eddie lying on his back, sound asleep in bed. His hair was haloed around his head and one hand was resting on his chest.

I shut the door behind me and then snuck closer to the bed. I set my pillow down next to Eddie’s on the bed and organzied my blankets on the mattress. As carefully as I could, I slipped under the blankets and into bed next to Eddie. When the mattress dipped under my weight, Eddie stirred. I saw his eyes open sleepily and he recognized me.

“I can’t sleep,” I whispered.

Eddie nodded slowly and rolled onto his side to face me. He held one arm out, indicating that he wanted me to scoot in closer. I did so, and then Eddie embraced me in a tight hug, holding me to his chest. He was warm and he smelled even better than all the blankets he had given me. I let my hand rest on his chest and closed my eyes as he pressed a kiss to my forehead.

“Better?” he asked.

“Better,” I said and quickly fell asleep.

#eddie munson #eddie munson fanfic #new fic #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x reader #female reader #eddie munson x you #stranger things #joe quinn #eddie munson x y/n #teach me #teach me part 1

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sheliesshattered · 1 month

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It's been about two and a half weeks since I posted my update about our trip to Batuu -- and it has been a weird two and half weeks. Shortly after I finished that post, Jack and I found out that our work contract was ending abruptly, effective March 1st. We always knew that was a possibility, and we're difficult to scare at this point, especially when it comes to work stuff, so where that might have filled some people with quite a lot of dread, Jack and I were both just like 'welp, I guess this is happening.'

We knew about a couple of possibilities for new work, but we figured we'd have at least two weeks off in between, just while we got everything lined up. Besides chasing down those potentials for a new contract, we also used the free time to get a bunch of household chores out of the way, things like taxes and taking the car into the shop and then getting it smog tested, going in for eye exams, all the sort of things that are easy to put off during the work week and then not want to do on the weekend.

And in between all that I actually got some sewing done too, lol. Whenever I first wear something that I sewed, I take notes on anything that needs to be fixed or adjusted or changed, and while I was generally happy with my outfit for our Batuu Bounding day, there were a few small things I wanted to fix about it -- both in the hopes of wearing it to Batuu again at some point, and so that the pieces can be worn on their own with other clothing.

For the sweatshirt I sewed to go underneath the blue linen vest, I actually knew what I wanted to change before we went to Batuu, but specifically put off making those changes until after our big Disney day. It was fine under the vest, but without the vest it fit a bit awkwardly: the edge finishing on the collar gaped open and didn't want to lay right, and the side seams flared out too much over the hips.

I ended up trimming the collar edging down to a much narrower width, like I said I might back near the beginning of February. I played around with adding another detail there, maybe a stand up collar just in the back, but in the end decided it looks fine with just that narrow trim.

To fix the flare over the hips, I ended up needing to take out the cool detail on the side seam. Sewing that up as a regular seam allowed me to fiddle with the fit much easier, and it also removed a lot of bulk from those multi-layered exposed seams. It fits under the vest even better now than it did before, and I can wear it without the vest, just with jeans or leggings or whatever.

For the vest, I was generally happy with the fit, but wearing it around all day made it clear just how much I actually needed hooks and eyes to keep the flap over the zipper closed. I went back and forth on how to do the hooks and eyes, contemplated putting them on the outside of the flap before deciding to hide them under the flap instead. I hand sewed several of them down, but then when it was just creating weird bumps and ripples in the center front, I took all of them off except the one right at the underbust.

That one hidden hook and eye was only just barely enough to keep the flap over the zipper from swinging open, so this last week I took off that one hook and eye pair, then started hand sewing them to the outside instead. I placed the one at the underbust first, since that's the most fitted point, then spaced the hooks out along the outside of the overlap at even spacing so that the top one ended up right at the very top corner of the flap.

My first round of sewing on a bunch of these taught me not to try to match up the eyes with the hooks by measurement or by what lays flat on my table, but rather to actually put the vest on and thread an eye through each hook and use tailor's chalk to mark where each eye needed to go. Like the rest of the vest, it absolutely will not lie flat on the table, but it fits me wonderfully, with no ripples or weird bumps along that center front edge.

I ended up really liking the way the exposed clasped looked, and I think it adds a really subtle Star Wars-y type detail. The black hooks and eyes nearly disappear on the dark blue linen (far more than in these well-lit photos), so they end up being just a bit of texture and visual interest rather than yelling about their claspiness.

Most of the time I'll wear it as in the photo above, with the top two clasps undone. The weight of the large metal hooks helps the triangular edge of the undone flap hang properly, which was another problem I had with it during our Batuu visit.

But the design really felt like it demanded a fully functional closure, so I added two more hooks up past the point where they're needed to actually cover the zipper. Leaving just one clasp undone results in a cool, slightly more asymmetric neckline:

And closing it all the way to the top creates a very sleek, buttoned-up kind of look.

I have some ideas about other pieces of clothing that I might be able to pair this vest with, and hopefully an excuse to wear my whole Batuu Bound outfit again in the near-ish future. Either way, I'll get some pictures of the updated vest on me sometime soon.

And since the new contract situation has worked itself out -- Jack and I will officially be back at it with a new client starting this week -- we're contemplating going to one of the Star Wars After Dark dates at Disneyland in April or May. I'll definitely wear the vest then, and possibly the sweatshirt too, depending on the night time temperatures predicted for whenever we end up going.

With that in mind, there's a new stash-busting sewing project I've started as well, but it really deserves its own post. Watch this space.

#my sewing #Batuu Bounding #Batuu vest #Jyn Erso sweatshirt #scrappy sweatshirt #2024 mood #long post

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fruitymctooty · 1 year

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TW // serious medical talk This is a really important update about what's going on. I'm copying/pasting the text from my Twitlonger post. Everything is under a read more.

Hey everyone. I've been inactive quite a bit due to family emergencies that have popped up.

I normally don't talk about these things publicly, but it's gotten so bad I've decided to give some sort of an update for my social media.

My father is currently in the hospital. On Tuesday (April 11th) he was found unconscious for up to two hours in the lumber department at a Home Depot store nearby where we live. He has a more severe case of type 2 diabetes and his blood sugar was found to be around 780 during this incident. He refused medical treatment but the Home Depot staff refused to let him drive home on his own as his condition could put himself and others at risk if he were to go behind the wheel.

He seemed a little out of it when I went to go see him the next day on Wednesday (April 12th). I assumed he was tired from the previous day's incident and that his medications might have been taking a while to kick in. I went to see him to pick up the car keys for our other van so I could pick up the van from the Home Depot parking lot. My father lives separate from us at the house that my mom owns. It's the same house she got in early 2021 that I've been trying to renovate from time to time. Me and my mother live in the condo unit we've had since early 2009.

On Saturday (April 15th) I was headed to my weekend delivery job. I was driving the family van since my regular car is currently in the shop as of writing this. I decided to stop by the house to drop off the other house keys and lockbox keys that my dad had attached to the van's key fob. When he answered the door I immediately knew something was wrong. He was showing signs of what looked like a typical stroke (left side of his body and face was mostly paralyzed, slurred and slowed speech, significant mental confusion). I called an ambulance for him after contacting my mother, my sister, and a close family friend about it.

He was taken to the emergency room and his fasting blood sugar was 465. The medical staff at the hospital tried bringing his blood sugar down and he got sleepy quickly. He's not in a coma, but he's been asleep since then and they haven't been able to get him to fully wake up. He also is unable to wake up on his own. I eventually found out that he hasn't been taking any pill medication for his diabetes and other ailments since November of 2022. He's supposed to take daily insulin injections for his blood sugar, but I found out that his most recent insulin injections he had expired in April of 2022.

I will give a more thorough update on his hospital stay and condition once he is out of the hospital, since things are still in progress with him. I've been going around updating my aunts and uncles on his side of the family (he has about seven or eight siblings; I don't know all of them since he's not great at keeping in touch with others). I've also been scrambling around to keep my mother, my sister, my friends, my partners, and close family friends about his condition as the hours and days go on. I'm his only kid and his next of kin so I've had to go back and forth on updating everyone. Once he's able to wake up on his own and is coherent, I'll have to discuss with him on becoming his power of attorney for healthcare in case anything serious happens in the future where he's unable to make medical decisions for himself.

On top of this, my mother also has her own laundry list of medical issues that require lots of various medications to keep her stable and alive. She also has type 2 diabetes but it's not as severe as my father's. Her other health conditions include interstitial lung disease (and lung scarring caused by this condition), severe sleep apnea, stage 3 pulmonary arterial hypertension, and edema (doctors suspect its caused by the heart struggling to keep up with her conditions). I'm mostly worried about her pulmonary arterial hypertension because there is no cure and it usually is the cause of death for those who are diagnosed with it.

Despite her conditions, she still goes to work since she's the financial stronghold of the household. Good friends of mine, along with my family and both my partners, all know about the debt that we have been dealing with. My mother has accumulated $120,000 USD of credit card debt and still owes about $180,000 USD for the mortgage on the house we got back in 2021. All together it's a total of $300,000 USD.

The things I can do to raise money is limited if it's through me, since I'm on SSI, and being on SSI means there are tight and usually unethical financial restrictions put on people like me. I get my healthcare through SSI via Medicaid. If I lose my SSI, I lose my healthcare. I have some health issues myself (mild GERD, possible PCOS, possible IBS, weight problems, some dental problems that I have to wait to get seen for, and mental health issues).

We are on the verge of bankruptcy and are possibly facing the loss of the little bit of stability that we have left. My mother isn't able to retire without risking financial ruin and she's dealing with an incurable disease that will most likely slowly kill her. I don't know if my father will bounce back from his current condition or not. I don't even know if his insurance will cover any of this.

I've been reluctant to open donations or fundraisers for this because I don't want to just take people's money left and right as I'd just feel bad about it.

I'm terrified. I'm exhausted. I don't know what to do.

#tw medical #serious post #im not even tagging this as the “fruity's rambles” tag bc it just seems. too non-serious of a tag for this.#also dw im physically ok #its my parents that are. not doing great

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goodmorningbadday · 9 months

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I haven’t updated on here in a while and I need to so this can still serve as my diary years later when my memory finally gives out. anyways

went to adjacent fest in may. 10/10 fest. always nice to be recognized and pointed out by the midtown guys :’) rip midtown always in my heart and ready for more shows whenever.

taylor swift in june. haven’t seen her live since she OPENED for keith urban in 2009 where I almost met her after the show at the buses. cried my eyes out sorry guys

TAI/FOB show at wrigley. before the show me & caitlyn had the nicest little talk with mike carden in a coffee shop. he asked if he was a loser for his coffee order. talked about the most random things. he looked so good. show was incredible!!!! I didn’t think it was possible for any other FOB show to be better than the metro show in jan but it was. GINASFS!!!!!!

flew to TX to see FTSK twice. genuinely was like one of the last pieces I needed to like heal teenage me. I walked into the venue of the first show and was there less than 5 minutes when caleb saw me and excused himself from a convo to come up to me. we were smiling so big and hugged and he said to me “I’m so glad you’re here” as we hugged and we had a quick catch up of just asking how the other has been. opening band was on so we couldn’t go in depth and I didn’t get to talk to him the rest of the weekend but that’s honestly okay. cried my fucking eyes out this weekend. breathe carolina was incredible!!!

then to LA for the two FOB shows at BMO, which turned into three FOB shows in 26 hours because a friend was able to get me into the KROQ show. TAI was incredible. FOBx3 was incredible. the KROQ show was so scary because they were so close with like less than 100 people in the room it was so SCARY. almost made my LA trip a full week just because I hadn’t been in a while and wanted more time in LA and my last night was going to be the emo nite that the gabilliam reunion happened at but I decided against it because I’m a MORONNNNN and was trying to be responsible when planning the trip…… had I known what I was going to miss………ugh I can’t even speak about it

THEN FOB at somerset which was still fun despite the almost cancellation. went with my sister who got me into FOB and it had been 17 years since her last FOB show :’) sad it was cut short because a lot of the older songs she was excited for for cut but we still had so much fun.

next on the agenda: FOB in boston & forest hills. movielife in boston. PARADISE FEARS (!!!!!!!!) in chicago & nashville. WWWYF day 1 & 2 in october. some more random shows between now and then, like the jonas brothers 3 times (because I got invited by 3 different groups of people LMAO), TWY, BLG & TSS, jeff rosenstock, the happy fits, idk what else anymore.

very happy w life, very happy I can honor young me by doing things like this and that those things still make me this happy, and that the people I looked up to as a teenager are still just as kind to me as they were 10-15 years ago, or just as kind as I had hoped they’d be as a teenager. turmax forever. midtown saves forever. santi forever. okay that’s all bye

#shows #or is it just #show #I don’t even remember my own tags anymore!!!!!#idk I have so many TAI/FOB/midtown videos rn if anyone wants any plz let me know

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be-ready-when-i-say-go · 1 year

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Love in a Ghost Town: Part 4--Parry, Game, Match

Eddie Munson’s become content with working his day job. After the crazy stretching of events from 1983-1986, Eddie’s grateful for a little bit of normal in his life.

That is until one day, Valeria Browns shows up in town looking for a quick car fix. And she’s more than he might’ve bargained for on the eve of Valentine’s Day. Valeria is just trying to enjoy her Valentine’s Day weekend after many years of being perpetually single. She has her fun, but it’s never serious. Maybe Eddie can change some of that.

Older!Mechanic!Eddie Munson. 2003 alternative universe. BlackFem! OC.

The Upside Down doesn’t exist in this fic. But strange things do happen to th town of Hawkins, Indianna. Major Character Death that is not canon as a result of the non-Upside Down AU.

Edited photo of Eddie by @eddiemunsons-missingnipple

Feel free to view my masterlist here

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It’s not hard navigating the town. Valeria manages to follow the main road down, much like Eddie did yesterday, until she hits what looks like a grocery store. It’s an early move, considering she had another four hours or so before it would be pressing, but Valeria doubts there’s much shopping on a downtown scene this early. Getting groceries now would open up her later morning. It’d be a lot of double back. In all honesty, all Valeria has is time to kill. That and gas to put into Eddie’s truck. Perhaps, she can also grab some snacks for herself. There are a few cars in the parking lot, but given the time of day, Valeria’s sure most of the town is working instead or on their way to work and the few cars she is seeing are the folks who work here at the store.

Valeria needs something fast to fix for Eddie’s lunch and maybe something extra to take care of dinner too, as a thank you for all his help. The truck door slams shut and Valeria surveys the parking lot. She keeps thinking about that headline-- her potential headline. Things were okay so far, but still the inclination to always be alert never truly leaves. She can settle it into the back of her brain when someone else is with her. But when Valeria is alone, the last thing she needs is to be slacking on her job of survival. Not a great look to get taken out because I didn’t take a few extra seconds to look around, she notes to herself before carrying herself across the parking lot. In the corner, near the front parking, she notes the brown truck Hawkins Police marked across the sides of it.

The front doors slide open as she gets closer to them and she spies a collection of handheld baskets right near the entrance. Valeria isn’t a chef. She did enough to survive and when she could cut corners with the occasional front with frozen means, she did. But Valeria could cook as necessary. She could make a casserole for dinner. Valeria has the recipes passed down from her grandmother memorized down to the “pinches” and “lil’ bit of”. It was a hard science to follow but after a lot of errors, Valeria got comfortable enough with it.

She wouldn’t have the time for that up against lunch and she’s sure if she spent all her time cooking Edde would be displeased to hear about it. Something quick would be her best alternative. Pasta wouldn’t hurt; it helps that it’s quick too. Her sneakers are fairly quiet over the tile floors. The speakers are soft as they play music overhead. It’s so subtle that it’s just barely noticeable. Her phone chimes from her pocket.

Still alive? the text from Tammie reads.

Valeria laughs and dials her friend’s number instead. It rings once in her ear and then is immediately picked up. “I’m still alive, Tammie,” Valeria laughs.

“Good! I would sure hope so. If you didn’t answer I was about to call the shop and the cops next!”

“Tammie, it’s just 8 in the morning.”

“And I’m going to make sure my best friend is alive. I let Chelsea and Tatianna know about your whereabouts too. They want updates.”

Valeria snorts. “Funny, because I haven’t gotten a call from either one of them.” Chelsea and Tatianna cared--Valeria knows that. But sometimes they get too caught up in their own lives that even if they have every intention to reach out, they rarely do. More than one fight had been had due to it.

“No, none of that Valeria. You can’t call them out. When’s the last time you called either one of them?”

“Tammie, I love you. But I will take Eddie’s truck and drive the two plus hours back to kick your ass lovingly.” It isn’t about the last time Valeria called either one of them. It’s about the fact that it’s always Valeria or Tammie doing the outreach.

“I know it’s not been easy since we graduated. I know they don’t connect like we do. But they’re our friends.”

Forever a peace keeper. Valeria’s not sure if she blames it on the fact that someone had too because she knows for sure it wouldn’t ever be here to keep the peace or if Tammie was always like that. The years have gotten murky in her memory. Valeria shuts her eyes for a moment, head tilted up and away from the boxes of pasta noodles. “I’m alive,” Valeria sighs. The words make her flash back to the thoughts of earlier in the morning, the kisses she and Eddie shared. Valeria snaps her eyes open and grabs the box of penne pasta noodles. “I’m probably more than alive.”

“Oh, oh, juicy details I presume,” Tammie laughs. “Give them. All of them.”

“I’m sort of in public, so not the full details. But,” Valeria turns the corner of the aisle, facing now the backwalls of the refrigerated items-milk, butter, eggs, creams, and cheeses. “He’s got a lot going for him. Even if at times he’s painfully awkward.”

“No, oh no,” Tammie wails over the line. “Do you not tell me you’ve fallen for another goofy white boy?”

“He’s sweet,” Valeria laughs. Her cheeks burn with her own embarrassment as she grabs whipping creams from the display. She’s careful with her collections of eggs and bacon to replace what they’d eaten just that morning.

“Sweet or not, you cannot sleep with every goofy white guy you meet!”

“He’s only the second.”

“Third--Tommy and Lenny.”

“Leonard, god, I forgot about him,” Valeria cackles as she grabs a packet of chicken breast.

“Yeah, at this point, you’ve got a type.”

Valeria notices Steve at the end of the aisle. He’s got a cart he’s pushing, dressed for work but it shocks her to see him now in the light of the store. His nose slopes into a point, high cheekbones keeping his face young. But still a cop. He catches sight of her and gives, which she returns, but she ducks her head fast and starts away from him--towards what looks like is the cereal aisle. “He’s got a type too,” Valeria returns.

“Who? Eddie? How do you know if he has a type?”

“It’s a small town, Tammie,” Valeria whispers. “Things just sort of come up.” Upon reassessing her basket, she realizes she’s running out of space. Miscalculation but do a half portion of chicken for Eddie’s lunch and then the rest she could set aside for a marinade.

“Hello? Earth to Val?” Tammie huffs through the receiver.

“Sorry, sorry, in the grocery store right now and trying to do mental math,” Valeria returns. “What were you saying?”

“What kind of things can come up that in the span of 24 hours, you’re sleeping with him and figuring out his type of women.”

“And men,” Valeria tacks on.

Tammie is silent for a moment. When she finally speaks again, after a 30 second rush of wind crackling through the receiver, her voice echoes, “What?! A threesome?”

Valeria can’t stop her laughter. “No, no, we talked a lot last night. This morning was more scandalous between the two of us.”

“I. Demand. Details,” Tammie hisses.

“Tell me, Tammie, are you currently in a stall in your job’s bathroom?” Valeria asks upon hearing the echo continue around Tammie’s voice.

“Maybe I am,” Tammie hums. “Maybe I’m not.”

“Just know it was a good time,” Valeria sings.

“You bitch!”

Valeria pulls the phone away from her ear at the shriek, laughing as she does. Tammie’s voice floats faintly from the speaker. She shouts words that Valeria can’t fully decipher and at the tail end laughs too. Valeria starts down the aisle like she’s going to be heading toward the checkout. She needs the cajun season, barbecue sauce, paprika, rice, and a vegetable--frozen would do.

“I need you to call me tonight and give me the details. I get off at 5 and we have dinner ready by 6:30. Call me before we eat,” Tammie orders.

“I will. Promise. Love you, Tammie.”

“Love you too, Val.” Punctuation. Valeria flips her phone closed and noticing Steve lingering at the checkout counter. The boy he stands next too is shorter than Steve, curly brown hair falling around his head. It's a shorter crop—the boys hair— but Valeria knows on first glance that his mother must’ve had a time taking care of the hair when he was younger.

Valeria keeps her head down, focusing instead of finding the right aisle for her needs. “Looking a little lost there, can I help?” There’s a lisp to the words but when Valeria looks up the boy with curly hair smiles at her.

Dustin, reads the nametag. “Oh, uh, browsing if I’m honest. Letting the aisle tell me what I need,” Valeria returns.

Dustin laughs. “Fair enough strategy. Wouldn’t listen too long—they might whisper about things that you definitely don’t need like the rewards program we’ve got.”

“A real salesman,” Valeria laughs. “Can you point me in the direction of the spices then?”

“Absolutely,” he scurries around the register. Something Valeria knows for a fact that only in a town like this would it happen. “Aisle 7. One up from grains, two down from canned goods.”

Aisle 6 has the rice then. Valeria wonders if that’s the same aisle that she got the pasta without realizing it. “Steve tells me you’re in town briefly,” Dustin comments, walking beside her now.

“Yeah, just a few days. Is-are you close to Steve?”

Dustin’s giggle is infectious. “What kind of spices are you looking for?”

“Paprika,” Valeria answers automatically.

“Steve--he used to babysit me. Long story.”

“Do you know Eddie?”

Dustin nods, handing over the tiny bottle to Valeria. “Adore that dude!”

“So you-you found him?” It’s a stupid question. Eddie had confessed that already. She’s just really putting the pieces together—names with faces, trying to understand truly how tight knit the group is. It’s a sick game really. Perhaps Valeria’s own way not to get too close because if she did, she’d be intruding. If she can see how well they all do as they are, she can watch but not dance in the fire. Not that Valeria thought she was getting too close anyhow. It would never really work. But it’s easy around Eddie. Maybe it’s really Valeria seeing if anything like a friendship could or should grow. But when Dustin’s face falters, she realizes the limit she pushed it with her own selfishness. “Sorry, sorry. No need to answer that.”

“I did,” Dustin answers. “I’m glad I did. I’m shocked Eddie talked about that.”

Valeria tightens her hold on the bottle. “A lot comes up sometimes.”

Dustin nods. “It was the whole party—me, Steve, Max, Lucas, Mike, Nancy, Robin, and Jonathan.”

“Jonathan who drives the bus. And Max who works at the candy store. You work here. Steve the Sheriff. Robin, the nurse who I haven’t actually properly met yet.”

Dustin nods. “Sounds like you’ve met a lot of us. Lucas and his family opened up a little bakery in town. Lucas is lined up to take over once he finishes classes at community college. It’s two doors down from the candy shop. Mike’s going away for college, following in his sister’s footsteps on that front.”

“Sister?”

“Nancy.”

It takes Valeria a moment but the petite woman with medium length wavy hair in heeled boots and a long winter coat comes back into her vision from yesterday. “Oh, I met her briefly yesterday. She went away for college?”

“Oh, yeah, Emerson. She’s a whiz. Don’t let her tiny stature and dainty clothes fool you. Studied journalism, worked at a magazine up there for a while. Moved back because of her mother. Runs the local paper here now. Real badass in her own way. Haggled the cops down while we got Eddie into the hospital. We broke a lot of traffic laws that day.”

“Seems like Hawkins really couldn’t get rid of y’all,” Valeria chuckles.

“Party sticks together.”

“Dungeons and Dragons?”

Dustin’s eyes lights up, bouncing on the balls of his feet. “You play?”

“I-I listen to a friend tell me about their campaigns. I don't really have the attention span to play. Nor the time.”

“But at least you get it. That’s half the battle. Do you need anything else by the way? I should get back to the registers or my boss will kill me.”

“Grains are one up from here, right?” Valeria asks.

Dustin nods with a thumbs up. “You got it! Shout if you need anything else.”

Valeria can only nod, watching Dustin bounce back to his station. Was it really that the party sticks together or was it that all of their situations had dragged them back to this place? One little town and yet it seemingly had a vice grip. Those that wanted to leave it only got sucked back into it for one reason or another. Valeria grabs the yellow rice she wants, and the rest of her necessities before traveling back up to the registers.

Steve’s long gone but Dustin is happy to chat as he rings Valeria up. He thankfully doesn’t ask what brought her into town--perhaps Steve had already warned him about it, perhaps because the whole town was figuring out the stranger town wasn’t there out of volition but out of necessity. “That shop--the bakery--you said it’s two doors up from the candy shop?” Valeria asks.

Dustin nods. “Best donuts in town.”

She can’t recall if Eddie pointed it out last night or not. He might’ve, but the night is a mixture of her embarrassment and her own arousal, so Valeria’s not sure she wants to try to trust her memory too much anyway. She gathers the bags with a tiny salute to Dustin. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome. Enjoy Hawkins!” he calls out.

There’s plenty other things I’d rather enjoy, Valeria thinks to herself. But there’s no need for Dustin to know that. Valeria’s quick to get back to Eddie’s trailer. He’d pressed the spare keys to the truck and to his trailer into her palm that morning with just a passing wink. Valeria wasn’t sure if it’s a private joke, or if it was just Eddie being Eddie but it’d put a flutter in her stomach and she pocketed the keys without a word.

The fridge rattles just a little as Valeria closes it. She immediately reaches a hand out to steady it, afraid that something is going to fall. But nothing does. “Can we not add anything else to this bill?” Valeria huffs. That would certainly make the detour in her vacation even more hilarious, but not what she wanted on her tab of things to pay for. Now, she had several hours to kill still.

“Welcome, what can I get you?” A tall lanky boy leans into the glass displays. It’s a fresh line up, that much Valeria knows. She can spot a fresh lineup anywhere. Her heart melts. Her shoulders drop. People like her. And sure, it was only this boy and his family from Dustin’s early comments that Valeria knew about. But at least there was somebody. There would be just a little bit of relief.

“I heard this shop has the best donuts in town.”

He grins, bright and wide. “That we do. Glazed, filled, Boston cream, bear claws, we got it all.”

“Dozen glazed donuts, if you got ‘em,” Valeria questions, pausing at the glass display. She eyes a few other treats--it looks like potentially apple crumble, but she’s not sure as her eyes take in all the treats available.

“Anything else?”

Valeria looks up and shakes her head. “I think I should be careful with treats,” she laughs. Lucas. She reads the nametag and then looks back to his face. He’s still grinning, but nods and turns to get gloves on.

“Can’t go wrong with a treat every now and then. So are we positive just about a dozen?”

Valeria laughs. “Sweetheart, I’m sure. Dustin recommended this place.”

“You’ve met Dustin?” His voice kicks up, the shock clearly painting his voice. “And he recommended this place?”

Valeria nods, but she understands the raising of Lucas’ brows. Did Dustin recommend the shop for the donuts or something else? his brow asks. Valeria shrugs in response before adding, “I think he might have a sweet tooth though, so I’ll be able to see here shortly if it’s worth the hype.”

Lucas laughs, shock melting away. He nods, Dustin wouldn’t get it. But maybe there were other powers at be. Valeria walks alongside the glass displays as Lucas carries the box over to the register. He pauses to grab a single box, plastic and see through. Valeria watches as he returns back to the big display, grabs another desert and then comes back. It looks like the apple crumble donut she was eyeing earlier. “11.43 for the dozen.”

“And the other one?”

Lucas shrugs, looking directly at Valeria. “I don’t see anything other than the dozen.”

Valeria brings out the few pills--a ten and a five. Lucas starts to count out the change and when he hands it over, she drops the bills into the tip jar. “Pay in advance because if these are good, I’ll be back before I leave.”

“Hope to see you again.”

In Eddie’s truck, Valeria is quick to tap out over the keys, the buttons clicking with the press and the tap of her nails. Found some kinfolk. Just one family so far, but it’s something.

We’ll take it, Tammie replies.

The shop today is livelier than anticipated. For a sleepy town like Hawkins, it shocks Valeria that she winds up parking off on the side lot. The front is full--the garage doors are up. Valeria grabs the metal lunch pail--she hadn’t missed the name Wayne etched into the front of it. Eddie didn’t have much else to use in the way of carrying the pasta, chips, and oranges. He had a bag that looked just barely touched but still fresh so Valeria tossed two in there. But Eddie’s selection of lunch carrying items were limited--not even spare plastic bag filled with other plastic bags tucked into a cabinet as a last resort effort. So Valeria took what was available, packed up the tupperware, canister with water, and took herself back down. Of course, she stopped at the gas station and grabbed a soda too, remembering the Mountain Dew Eddie sucked down during their first meeting, alongside the box of donuts.

“Need a hand?”

Valeria turns the voice, noticing the man from earlier wiping his hand on a rag. “I think,” Valeria starts and then notices the between the pail hooked around her fingers and the balancing she’s doing with the donuts and Eddie’s soda, she may not have enough hands. “I think maybe.”

He’s timid as he approaches. “I’m Gareth,” he introduces, taking the box of donuts from her hold.

“Valeria.”

“Nice to meet you properly.” He nods his head over his shoulder into the garage and Valeria gets the doors locked before follow.

“Thank you for the help, Gareth. The donuts are for y’all--everyone in the shop, folks you want donuts really I guess.”

“Of course,” he smiles. He leads them into the front, sliding the box onto the desk. “And thanks, for thinking of us. I’ll be sure to keep the guys from going into the box grubby hands first.”

“Much appreciated,” Valeria laughs. Sitting are a couple other people, flipping through magazines, but clearly being serviced. Eddie sits at the desk, phone pressed to his ear, rubbing at the bridge of his nose. She’s careful as she places a hand on his shoulder to alert him of her presence. It still makes Eddie jerk up, but he smiles when he sees it’s Valeria. She slips the metal box and soda onto the desk gently.

Eddie presses the phone to his shoulder. “Thanks for this.”

“Of course. Make sure you actually get a donut too. I think I spotted some of the guys plotting the poor treats demise.”

He snorts. “Count me a part of the list. Looks like you visited the Sinclairs for them.”

Valeria nods, noticing now she’s kept a steady slip of her hand over his shoulders. “Ran into Dustin at the grocery store who recommended I give them a visit.”

“Before you know it, you’ll be a Hawkins townie.”

“No, do not put that juju on me. Absolutely not.” Their shared laughter only carries for another moment and then Valeria nods back towards the door. “I should probably get going. Don’t mean to make that other person wait.”

“Oh, no, I’m the one on hold and have been for the last ten minutes. I’m starting to think I’m being suckered.”

“What’s going on?”

“Vendor I get parts from recommended a new place to get our cleaning stuff because I was complaining about the prices rising. But this order was supposed to be in last week. I’ve checked with the post office, I have the track number, and it’s still saying the post office hasn’t received the package. At this point, I’m better off just going into the city and getting it than having them bullshit me about sending out a replacement. I’m now on hold so they can speak with their supervisor to see what can be done.”

Valeria doesn’t get much of a chance to respond before Eddie excuses himself, mouthing sorry, He speaks directly into the receiver, a tilt in his town giving away his slight annoyance, “Hey, yeah, I’m still here.” It says everything he doesn’t: Yes, I’m still on hold. Yes, I won’t be going anywhere until it’s resolved.

Valeria’s been on both sides of the coin herself--has known the hassle of someone else making the mistake but Valeria being the face or voice that bears the consequence as well as just wanting to get a resolution that doesn’t make her feel like she’s going insane.

“If this replacement package doesn’t come, can I cancel this order then and just get the money back?”

There’s a pause. Eddie reclines into the chair, face turned up to the ceiling. “Yeah, just cancel it now then.” A longer pause. “Uh huh, yeah, thank you.” Pause. “7-10 business days depending on the bank, yeah, I got it.”

Valeria scoots the metal lunch pail closer to Eddie. “It’s not much, but maybe it’s better than that call.”

Eddie snorts. “I think anything would be better, that’s for certain.”

She watches the lingering touch, the slow stroke of Eddie’s thumb over Wayne’s name. “I couldn’t find anything else,” she whispers.

Eddie shakes his head. “I tossed mine years ago. It’s probably why I’ve relied on gas station lunches so much.” His words are tight in his throat, soft at the fall from his lips. But his movements continue.

The tension is palpable and Valeria wonders if she’s pushing a wound too far. Her words catch, holding on the sides of her throat like they don’t want her to speak. Like the words somehow know better than her that she can’t speak or something will be ruined. The latch clicks, metal tapping against metal. It only takes a quick push with his thumbs and then the lid falls open, tapping against the back of half of the box.

Eddie’s inhale is deep. “Pasta?” he questions. “Would’ve killed for a PB&J.”

“Is that what Wayne used to eat?”

Eddie nods. “Every single day at lunch. Never wanted anything else.”

“I’ll remember that for tomorrow,” Valeria offers.

“Two oranges?” Eddie questions, holding them both up. “Are you telling me something?”

Valeria snickers. “A balanced diet. Protein. Carbs. Fruit.”

“How do the chips fit into a balanced diet?”

“Fats. Need a little bit of it,” she returns, pinching at Eddie’s side over his coveralls.

Eddie laughs, trapping her hand into his body with his elbow. Valeria’s laughing and tugging gently to free her hand. Eddie’s persistent though, turning now from the chair and moving her hand from his side into his. “That’s what the donuts were supposed to be for.”

Valeria shakes her head. “That’s just me being sweet on you.” It’s not an entire lie, but it’s not entirely the truth either. It’s a nice gesture for sure. But Valeria had wanted to explore more of the town, see how much the town was a sleepy little town not able to keep up with the times and how much of it still held something of a not so distant past.

So far, all Valeria had down was a town that was trapped in a perpetual cycle. Raising a lot of children who wanted nothing more than to break away and then never being able to full get away because of something--parents, personal fears. Hawkins had claws and they ran deep. Quite possibly it wasn’t worth making such assumptions only based on a handful of stories--all second hand to her, and sometimes third hand.

“Have you eaten?”

Valeria nods at Eddie’s question, giving his hand a squeeze. “Yeah, I did.”

“Edmund Munson Junior!” A brassy voice bellows into the air of the otherwise relatively quiet shop.

“You’re a junior?” Valeria asks, brow raising in the question.

“Technically,” Eddie returns and then pushes out of the seat and walks around Valeria. Not without a soft smile and another squeeze of her hand. “Yes, Buckley?”

Valeria takes in the woman--about Eddie’s height if she had to gauge--with chin length wavy brown hair. Her smile is bright, voice raspy like someone who used to smoke or used to scream much too much as a kid. The woman levels a finger in Eddie’s direction. “I’m here on account of a candy pick up.”

“Buckley, I told you I was out of the game.”

She laughs, closing the gap between them, thumping his nose gently. “I’m one of your most loyal customers. When was I supposed to get this news?”

Their hug is tight, but brief. Valeria ducks her head watching them for the moment and tries to place where she’s heard the name before. “I actually got sidetracked this morning. Your candy is at home. You know I would never leave you high and dry.”

“Dingus. What got you so distracted this morning that you forgot the most important day of the week? Hmm?”

The woman--Buckley-- finally seems to take full sight of Valeria. She smiles again, though there is something hesitating in the gaze. Valeria can’t tell the gaze is assessing out of fear or of its an assessment out of curiosity. Eddie groans and it’s enough noise to make Valeria bring her gaze to him. “Not again, Robs,” he laughs. “Please not again!”

Robs? Robin! It clicks, Valeria smiles back at Robin. It makes sense the blue scrubs she’s dawned in. But Robin’s eyes are widening, body physically recoiling from Eddie with the action. “You didn’t! No! Can I have nothing ?”

Valeria can only watch as they laugh.

“You’re-why must we be so alike?” Eddie huffs, shoving her shoulder lightly.

Robin scrubs her palms over her eyes. “I’m bleaching my eyes officially. I’m going to retire from nursing and go somewhere tropical and I swear to god, I’m going to forget about you Eddie. Why are you in my head?”

“You’re supposed to be Steve’s soulmate, not mine!”

“Steve’s like a lost cat and I’m like a lost puppy and we just sort of adopted each other you know. Street rats scraping it by in the town that’s trying to eat us alive. We,” Robin starts, motioning between her and Eddie, “are like sharing--literally sharing--radio frequencies and that get crossed and somehow we’re a soul split into two bodies. We’re supposed to be oil and water mortal enemies given my allegiance to dear ol’ Steven, but somehow when I’m supposed to be holding a blade to your neck I’m just offering you a beer. You disgust me sometimes, Eddie, with how inside my cranium you are.”

Robin’s rant sends her pacing, the squeak of her sneakers denoting when she’s taken the sharp turn away from Eddie or towards him. Valeria finds herself laughing, enraptured in Robin’s frustration. She has a suspicion what might be going on, but she’s much more amused with Robin’s clear distress than anything else. Valeria pops open the box, noticing two donuts have gone missing so far. She takes a sheet from the roll of paper towel that’s been deposited next to the box in all her distraction with Eddie and plucks up a glazed donut using the paper towel to keep things as sanitary as possible.

“Like some sugar to go with your panic attack?” Valeria offers, holding out the donut to Robin. Valeria smiles--genuine, but she can’t help a little drip of seduction behind it too. Robin seems easily flustered and it’s a delight to watch her cheeks go rosy.

Robin’s sentence chokes to a close as she stares Valeria down. She nods--it’s shy and almost imperceptible. Her eyes are caught wide in surprise, lips still parted with syllables that were almost uttered. There’s never been a more perfect definition for the word dumbfounded than Robin’s face at the sound of Valeria’s voice. Valeria grins, passing it over to her. “T-thanks,” she returns.

“No problem. I could, if it’s okay, drop the candy off to you. I’m sort of borrowing Eddie’s truck while my car gets fixed.”

“I-I work at the hospital,” Robin returns.

Valeria nods. Definitely a lot more fun to ruffle Robin’s feathers. But also if the candy is meant for her, Valeria’s not going to let Eddie’s oversight impede Robin. “When does your shift start?”

“At 2. Which-” Valeria sees it, the gears starting to turn again for Robin. She’s returning to herself little by little. “It’s in like 25 minutes. And it’s only 5 minutes to the hospital from here. But would be longer to go to Eddie’s and then get back. So, if-if it’s okay with you, yeah, yeah you can drop it off to me. At the hospital. Where-where I work.”

“I can do that. What candy is yours?”

Robin starts to form words, but her mouth just gapes for a moment. Eddie pushes the donut up in her hand gently to her mouth. “Everything but the peach rings. They should be still on the coffee table.”

Valeria nods, watching Robin finally take a bit of the donut. “Everything but the peach rings, got it. Would I need a visitor’s pass? Should I tell security to page for you, Robin?”

She nods, then realizes the question that’s actually been asked. “Page--sorry, sorry. You should have security page to the 3rd floor front desk for me, Robin,” she laughs. When her eyes slowly drift away from Valeria over to Eddie, they narrow. “Dickhead,” she mutters.

Eddie’s laughter is loud--sputtering like a car that’s not willing to start. Robin’s verbal assault of Asshole, who enjoys too much the suffering of others doesn’t slow his amusement. “Buckley, you know I love you right?” Eddie returns, wiping the corners of his eyes.

“I know you like to see me suffer,” Robin returns. She’s downed half the donut.

“Same thing,” Eddie returns.

“Steve’s going to hear about this. I am so ratting you out for enjoying my suffering.”

Eddie looks over to Valeria. “I mean, Valeria should also be getting some blame. She was playing unfair.”

Valeria huffs, pushing up from the counter. “I was trying to help Robin after you forgot her candy.”

“And who’s fault is it that I forgot?”

“Yours,” Valeria huffs.

Eddie’s brow raises and Valeria can feel the heat blazing under her skin. “Maybe some of it is mine. But..”

“Ew, ew, ew, ew,” Robin huffs, “I don’t need that mental image. Not a second time. Thank you, Valeria. I really appreciate you helping me and my little kiddos out by bringing the candy to me. And for the donut too. It was amazing. I am going to leave now before I embarrass myself any further. Nice to meet you, Valeria. I’m sorry for…being all that.”

“Never apologize, Robin,” Valeria returns. “Nice meeting you too.”

Robin’s sneakers squeak as she turns to head back to the front door. She’s muttering to herself, but the distinct words aren’t clear enough to catch. Eddie plucks a donut from the box, a smile on his lips. “You really don’t play fair. Robin’s never been that flustered in her life since high school.”

“I take it that you and Robin share more than just an adoration for each other.”

“Maybe once Robin and I got a little too drunk and confessed crushes we had--turns out we have a lot more in common than we originally guessed. It also probably didn’t help that her crush had been someone I sort of hooked up with once.”

“Sort of hooked up with?”

“We never got past touching under clothes.”

“Well, now you’ve got a home run so I wonder how that’s going for Robin?”

“Robs, I love her. Her and Nancy keep flitting around each other. Robin’s scared Nancy will leave again.”

“So they dated before?” Valeria questions.

“No. But Robin’s had a crush on Nancy scene ‘85.”

Valeria whistles. “Long time to have a crush. I promise I won’t go breaking her heart. I have a feeling there’s no shovel talk.”

“Yeah, yeah for her, probably.”

Valeria holds her first three fingers. “Scouts honor then,” she states. “No broken hearts.” Valeria means no broken hearts for Robin. That she’ll just drop off the candy and slip away without anything extra. But there’s something in Eddie’s eyes--it’s brief. It’s not quite sadness, but whatever it is turns down his eyes. It dampness the usual sparkle and then the darkness is gone. The shine sparkes again like it always has.

He smiles, repeating her stance. “Thanks for lunch by the way. I really appreciate it.”

“You’re welcome, Eddie.”

________________________________

2:09PM--that’s the time that Eddie’s radio reads when Valeria pulls into the parking lot to the hospital. The candy was there on the table right there Eddie said they’d be making the departure from the shop back to his trailer and then subsequently back into the town quick and painless. Valeria will give Hawkins that--it’s relatively easy and painless to get anywhere inside the town. There may not be a lot inside of the town, but at least it’s easy to navigate.

The candy rustles in the bag at her side, but Valeria keeps her stride long and even. The doors slide open and upon entrance, a woman greets her at a side table. “What brings you in today?”

“I actually need to see Robin Buckley. I have something for her.”

The woman nods, passing Valeria a pink sticker, VISITOR is written across the top of it. “Head over to security. He can have her paged down here.”

Valeria nods, slapping the sticker onto her chest. The guard is an older man, hat pushed up so far on his head it’s barely on. But he smiles at Valeria approaches. “How can I help you today, ma’am?”

“One of the nurses--Robin Buckley--I’m here to pass along something to her.”

The man nods. “Name, please.”

“Valeria Browns.”

He reaches for the phone, then pauses. “Oh, let me make sure it’s no contraband.” Valeria happily tips the bag forward, showing all the individual bags of candy into his line of sight. His grin is bright. “Oh, the kids are going to love this.” He punches at the keys. “Hi, Linda. Can you spare Buckley for a moment? A Valeria Browns is here to see her.”

A few moments pause. Valeria takes in the bustle of people around them. For a small town hospital, Valeria doesn’t anticipate so many people walking about. Most are staff--denoted by their badges and scrubs. But there’s clearly townspeople here. Some are waiting on the first floor. It looks like there might be some outpatient area. Just beyond Valeria’s not sure. Maybe it’s the emergency department. Though Valeria was sure not to use that entrance.

“First floor, just off from radiology actually.”

Radiology. Valeria smiles when her eyes catch the security guard’s eyes. “Buckley will be right down.”

Valeria nods, stepping off to the side, bag of candy still tapping at her calves. There’s never been a lot of love for hospitals. She’d been at one with her grandmother to identify her parents bodies’. Once Valeria broke her wrist and spent several hours waiting to get a cast. They’re always a little bit too cold and somehow too stuffy at the same time. A necessity Valeria understood, but not a place she could spend hours on end at.

“Uh, hi.” Robin gives a tiny wave.

“Hi,” Valeria returns, extending out the plastic bag. “As promised.”

Robin takes the bag gently. “Thanks. And um-I’m sorry about earlier. That was totally weird. What happened at Eddie’s shop. He and I--it’s complicated and weird. We’re like…siblings after everything that happened. And we just, it’s weird and I want to apologize.”

Valeria nods. “Like I said, Robin, never apologize.”

“But I have to. It was totally, totally, totally weird what happened. Eddie and I are almost too much alike sometimes. I didn’t mean to make you feel weird or anything.”

The urge takes over before Valeria can really stop it. She takes Robin’s forearm gently into her hold. “I’m flattered.”

“But you and Eddie--and I’m--but.” Valeria only smiles, and then Robin’s face lights up. “ Oh .”

“Oh,” Valeria laughs.

“Oh. My. God.” Robin grins, a small giggle leaving her. “Of course, of course. So of course.”

Valeria loves the light in Robin’s face. The way her own giggles make her appear so much younger. “So again, never apologize, Robin.”

“Thank you, Valeria. Seriously. I mean it. Thank you.” Her voice is softer. Robin slips in a little closer to Valeria. “I really do mean it. I appreciate the candy, your understanding. How long are you going to be in town for? You don’t look like someone who’d just pick Hawkins as a place to land?”

“I’m-I’m not really. Just here until my car gets fixed. Check engine light came on and Hawkins was the closest town.”

Robin nods. “That’ll do it. Hasn’t been so bad has it? In Hawkins?”

Valeria shakes her head. “Hasn’t been all bad. Definitely been interesting.”

“Oh, c’mon. Hawkins isn’t that bad. Now.” Now-- present. Then--past. Evolution, but it’s always tethered. One cannot evolve without a starting part.

“Eddie said the same thing,” Valeria returns. “1983-1986?” Valeria tacks on in question.

Robin nods. “Oh, that’s the stretch. You are correct. Absolutely bonkers of a time. I met Steve in ‘84 working in an ice cream shop. The rest is sort of history now. It’s not necessarily jumbled but it’s a lot there.”

Robin’s gaze is unsettled. Like the years are playing in front of her eyes. Valeria’s firms her grip to Robin’s forearm. It seems to bring her back and she shakes her head. Valeria wonders what memories are replaying. How did ice cream turn into a witch hunt for Eddie? But perhaps, there will always be holes for Valeria. She won’t be here forever.

“Madness,” Robin echoes. “Sorry, sorry. Anyways. Thanks so much for dropping off the candy. My kiddos and I are forever indebted to you.”

Valeria only laughs, patting Robin’s hand. She placed it at some point on Valeria’s hands. How Valeria didn’t notice it before, but Robin’s hands are warm. Like she might keep warmers in her pockets so she’s never startling the children she works with. “Tell them it is an honor to drop off candy for their recovery.”

Robin salutes Valeria. “Aye, captain.”

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