janaispunk
the horny poets department
• jana (she/her) • 29 • ceo of the dave york pit • joel miller apologist/enthusiast • frequently reading, occasionally writing • 18+ only, mdni • masterlist • rec masterlist • ko-fi •
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THEY’RE SO ADORABLE IT’S NOT EVEN FUNNY
Take Me To Church Drabble
Rating: Mature (mentions of smut)
Tags: @profkenobi @corellians-only @clydesducktape @duker42 @lilkermit14 @thesadvampire @phoenixhalliwell @jura-moon @rentskenobi @absurdthirst @misslolasworld @mostly-megan @justanotherblonde23 @lose-eels @zeldasayer @the-wishmonger @dindjarinvibe @spideymanreads @fortunately-golden @j2thepowerof3 @thick-dick-din-daddy-djarin @princessxkenobi @66wookies @ohmygawd-life @kiwi-the-first @talesfromtheguild @coonflix @roxypeanut @cowboy-kylo @thewayofthemandalorian @chews-erotically @storiesofthefandomlovers @vesperstalksclones @catsnkooks @keeper0fthestars @huliabitch @seawhisperer @auty-ren @dela-arthur @thewaythisis @yespolkadotkitty @promiscuoussatan @quesofromagecheese
THE HENHOUSE
His warm, dry hand curled over your hip, he leans in to press a kiss to your throat; mouthing the skin there for a moment before pulling back with a smile.
“Come on, girl; tell me.”
You smile back, your cheeks hot with embarrassment. “You’re just gonna laugh at me.”, you say, reaching to brush a lock of hair away from his brow.
His eyebrows drop into a stern frown; his voice solemn. “Never.”
Rolling your eyes, you bite your lip in thought for a moment before you speak.
“Okay, fine. Chickens.”
His brow shoots up in shock before his face breaks out in a grin; his shining eyes lighting up as he lets out a deep belly laugh and quake of his body shakes yours as you lay next to him.
“See!”, slapping his shoulder lightly, your voice playfully outraged. “I told you you would laugh!”
Still chuckling under his breath, he searches your face for the truth and a fresh wave of laughter bubbles up when he sees you are serious.
“Chickens, girl? You’re afraid of chickens?” His hand moves to stroke your cheek with the back of his knuckles, but you sharply pull it away from his reach as he grins at you. “What’s a little chicken gonna do to you?”
“I don’t know! Nothing, probably!”, you exclaim, your own face serious against his delighted one. “I just don’t like how they move. They’re so skittish and fast! And the pecking!”, your body shuddering at the thought, Din pretends you agree with you; his face a mocking, serious expression.
“Oh, stop”, you scold, smiling back up at him as you watch his tanned chest work another little laugh out; his throat moving with it. “What about you, mister? What animal are you most afraid of?”
His answer is immediate. “Snakes.”
You roll your eyes again, his answer being an obvious choice and therefore not good enough for you. His fingertips trace your eyebrow, moving down the side of your face until they curl around your ear; stroking the skin at the top. Leaning into his touch, you challenge his answer. “Oh come on; everyone says snakes.”
Gently pinching the lobe of your ear between his fingers and thumb, he lightly tugs your head to the side and leans down to kiss your neck. His reply is muffled; his lips dragging against your skin. “That’s because it’s the right answer, girl.”
After a moment, you feel his ribs move with a renewed low laugh; his hot breath puffing into the crease between your shoulder and neck. Still running his tongue over your skin, he slides his hand down to palm your breast, taking the weight of it in his hand and stroking the buttery soft skin on the side of it.
Tipping your head back into the pillow to give him more room, he dips his tongue into the hollow of your throat before pulling back. “Maybe you like snakes, girl”, his deep voice teasing. “Since they can get into a henhouse and kill those scary old chickens.”
Your face confused at his first statement, it quickly morphs into an exasperated smile as he grins back before leaning back down to you and this time you feel the tickle of his mustache against the sensitive skin of your breast. Gliding his tongue over the peak, he draws it into his mouth and you watch his cheeks hollow with the motion. Pushing the hair back from his face, you admire the sight of his long eyelashes fanned against his cheeks; his eyes closed as he inhales your scent and watch his throat work as he swallows; the muscles flexing under the skin.
His body sliding against yours, you shift on the mattress to scoot over and make room for him between your legs. Kissing the underside of your breast before moving his attention to the other one, you run your hands over his broad shoulders, dipped in the middle as he is bent to his task. Moving his way back up you body, you feel him heavy against your entrance; the length of him hot against your thigh as he reaches down to spread your legs wider.
“What do you say, girl?”, his voice vibrating against your chest as he rests his weight on top of you. “You gonna let this snake into your henhouse?”
A laugh bursting from you, you feel his smile against your skin, amused at his own comment and the both of you chuckle together; your bodies lightly shaking the mattress.
Reaching down, you splay your fingers over his ass and widen your legs as you press him to you; his thick cock sliding into your slick center. Purposely tightening yourself around him, you feel a sharp intake of breath from his mouth against your throat as he pushes further into you; filling you with a stretch.
Pulling him to you for a kiss, you smile against his lips when you finally answer his question. “Gladly.”
#i’ve only known them for one day but they’re already everything to me#janas recs#din djarin x reader
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they’re getting so close to each other!!!!! i love love love them. and the kid is just precious omg 🥹
Take Me To Church: Chapter 4
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Smut: oral sex (female receiving), sex, dirty talk.
Words: 3.2K
CHAPTER FOUR: THE HILL
It’s the late afternoon, just before dinner, when you wake up to Gracie lightly shaking your shoulder.
“Hey, you gotta wake up, sweetie”, she says quietly, drawing her hand back to give you some space. “Din is here.”
Blinking rapidly to clear the sleep from your eyes, you turn your face towards her and hum a stretch out, your arms extending in front of you. “Ok, sounds good.” Looking at her more clearly now, “You gonna get the tub or do you want me to do it?”
“Madam says he only wants you tonight”, she says, shrugging her shoulders. “I think he’s hurt. He didn’t look too great coming in.”
Frowning slightly, you sit up on your elbows in bed, rubbing one eye with the heel of your hand. He must be hurt; you’ve never heard of Din only wanting one girl.
Keep reading
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another week, another round of fic recs :)
as always, if you read any of these and enjoy them, please remember to show the writers some love with comments or reblogs!
for a list of all my recs ever, go here!
i'll sort the fics by character and add emojis to indicate the contents a little. still, please look at the tags/warnings and decide for yourself if something might not be your cup of tea.
💘= fluff • ❤️🔥= smut • 🤍= angst • 🖤= dark
dave york
unveiled by @punkshort ❤️🔥🤍
riddles by @yxtkiwiyxt 💘❤️🔥🤍
dave york & marcus pike
playdate by @daddy-dins-girl 💘❤️🔥🤍
dieter bravo
fruiton drabble (don’t ask lmao) by @ozarkthedog 💘
din djarin
take me to church by @frannyzooey 💘❤️🔥
frankie morales
date night by @artsy-girl-76 💘
do me yourself by @undercoverpena 💘❤️🔥
joel miller
what matters by @pedroshotwifey ❤️🔥
soil in the lines of their palms by @5oh5 💘❤️🔥
whatever you want by @ace-turned-confused ❤️🔥
not in rivers, but in drops by @sin-djarin 💘🤍
high infidelity by @dancingtotuyo 💘❤️🔥🤍
woman by @dancingtotuyo 💘❤️🔥🤍
like real people do by @mrsmando 💘❤️🔥🤍
you’re gonna go far by @mrsmando 💘
chokehold by @hellishjoel ❤️🔥
july by @psychedelic-ink (featuring tess) ❤️🔥
flesh and metal by @swiftispunk ❤️🔥
ruined! by @gutsby ❤️🔥
daddy’s girl by @fungal-rot 💘
helen by @kiwisbell 💘❤️🔥🤍🖤
marcus pike
raining in baltimore by @schnarfer 💘🤍
my own writing
delicate - modern!oberyn martell x f!reader 💘❤️🔥
#weekly fic recs#pedro pascal#joel miller#din djarin#frankie morales#dave york#dieter bravo#marcus pike#oberyn martell
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i just feel strongly that work shouldnt be the Main Activity of five days out of the week
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😵💫😵💫😵💫😵💫😵💫😵💫 i need him so bad it’s concerning
Take Me To Church: The Union Suit
Take Me To Church Universe
pic by @heythere-mel
Rating: Explicit
Warning: mentions of smut, oral sex (male receiving), the suit itself needs a warning 🚨👄🚨
Words: 980
“Oh my god”, you exclaim softly, as you sit up in bed to watch Din get dressed before he heads out. The shape of his broad shoulders visible through the thin red fabric, you follow the length of his body down, the material snug around his firm backside, tight to the shape of his thighs and calves.
“What?”, he asks, turning towards you with a questioning frown on his face and your breath catches when you see the front of the suit.
Watching his deft fingers fasten two buttons over his chest, you bite your lip at the way the wool is somehow even tighter in the front. The fabric pushed up over his forearms, the muscles there flex thick and strong under their fine dusting of hair. You focus there for a moment before letting your eyes wander over the slight dip of his hips, the stretch of the material over his taut belly and up towards his chest, the neckline dipping low enough to see a peek of his collarbones.
The top button undone, you follow the line of them down, six buttons in all — the last one directly over his crotch.
Unable to take your eyes off of how he seems somehow even more naked wearing the suit, you are breathless when you ask, “What is that?”
A deep frown etched into his brow, he stands there and looks down the length of his body.
“What is what?”, he asks, looking back up at you.
Your eyes are fixed on the top undone button. “That thing you’re wearing.”
Peering at you like you’ve gone dumb; he picks up his thick socks and sits down in a chair. Opening the folded bundle in his hands, he answers, “My union suit, girl. My long underwear.”
Crawling out of bed, you go to stand between his legs and slowly kneel in front of him, placing your hands on his knees and pulling them open.
Pushing your hair away from your brow and tucking it softly behind your ear, he watches you with puzzled amusement as you run your palms up and down his thighs. “What are you doing, girl? Didn’t you get enough last night? Or this morning?”
The suit slightly riding up as he sat down, you felt your cunt clench at the way his thighs strained through the fabric; the soft folds of it gathered tight around his crotch. Realizing that this must have been what he felt like when you wore your silk outfit for him the other day, you can’t stop yourself from splaying your hands over the material; slightly squeezing the firm muscles underneath as you slide your hands up between his thighs.
“Are you serious right now, girl?”, he asks in a low voice, shifting his hips down in the chair to open his legs wider. Scooting forward a little on the hard floor, you get closer to the juncture of the suit and gently place your palm over the bottom button, gently pressing into him with the heel of your hand.
You can feel the soft length of his cock right under your palm, yielding to your touch and you wrap your hand around it; your fingers gliding over the swell as your thumb presses inward along the length.
Stiffening under your exploration, you watch in fascination as the fabric shifts under your gaze; the bulge under your hand slowly hardening. You keep stroking him through the fabric until he is fully hard, the defined shape of his cock visible through the tight wool and you feel your mouth water as your tongue pokes out to lick your lips.
Reaching down, he places his thumb on your plump bottom lip, resting it in the middle and waits for you to take it into your mouth.
Looking up at him, you suck on the pad of his thumb hard, dragging your wet, warm tongue over it as you watch his eyes darken. Leaning back, you let it fall out of your mouth and he watches as a fine, glistening string of saliva trails between the tip and your mouth.
Sticking your tongue out to break it, you lean forward and opening wide, your put your hot mouth over the tip of his cock, letting your saliva dampen the fabric as his hips jolt forward in the chair. Giving it a slow, firm kiss, he can feel the heat of your mouth through the wool and you watch as a small wet spot appears as a spurt of precome dribbles out.
Gliding the tip of your nose from the base up the thick length, you ask him to help you with the buttons and he does; slowly undoing them one at a time as you watch. The smooth, tan skin of his sternum slowly appears with every undone button and you watch, hypnotized. The opening goes lower over his stomach; the dark, coarse hair of his belly peeking out above the vee of fabric.
Knowing exactly what this is doing to you, he watches you squeeze your thighs tightly together and shift your bottom on your heels; squirming as the deep ache in your center worsens. The undoing of the second from last button makes the the fabric gape away from his stomach as he slouches in the chair, a thicker thatch of dark hair exposed. His hand pauses over the last button for a moment and you watch his thick, calloused fingers undo it; his eyes on your face.
Your mouth hanging slightly open as you wait for him, he works the button open and you can just see the smooth skin of his heavy cock tucked under the fabric. Pulling again on your bottom lip, he presses his thumb back into your mouth and his voice is low and sinful when he speaks.
“Well what are you waiting for, girl? Take it out.”
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girlhood is staying up late to read the top posts in an x reader tag
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6 random songs from my 'on repeat' playlist
thank you for the tag @joelsdagger <3
fortnight (feat. post malone) - taylor swift
the last one - maisie peters
espresso - sabrina carpenter
not strong enough - boygenius
so high school - taylor swift
a change of heart - the 1975
npt: @joelsgreenflannel @yxtkiwiyxt @theweedisasterxoxo @endlessthxxghts @reddedmiller
@swiftispunk @ozarkthedog @mrsmando @catchallfangirl @beskarandblasters
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Have you ever seen barbie and the nutcracker? I was watching it with the kid I babysit and she said “The nutcracker looks like that man you always talk about” !!! Pedro😭😭😭
goodbye
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Oh god he looks so good!
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lmao i can’t 😭 this is soooo dieter! love our silly chaotic man <3
Dieter Bravo + this couch. That is all.
Happy birthday sweet Ozzie! 😘🎊
ok wteverlivingfuck, rose hahahahahaah ilusm this is so silly and SO Dieter. I can't create a moodboard that would do this justice, so you get a blurb instead. 😘
-> silly, chaotic fluff ahead!
"Dieter!" You frantically shout, staring perplexed at the monstrosity of a couch situated in the middle of your living room.
Heavy footsteps grow steadily closer until Dieter is bent over with his hands on his knees, gasping beside you. "What's wrong, love?"
"What is this?!" you motion toward the obscenely large, suede banana.
Dieter's face perks up, all the joy and youthful energy racing to the surface. "It's the fruiton I was telling you about." He beams, strutting over to the gaudy piece of furniture before plopping onto the cushions.
"I don't remember discussing buying a piece of fruit for a couch," you say, crossing your arms in disbelief.
His brow pinches. "I'm pretty sure we talked about it," he scratches his jaw pensively, "or it could've been a dream."
You rub a hand over your face. This wasn't the first time Dieter had bought something outlandish, and it surely won't be the last.
He stretches his arms out toward you, hands grabbing the air, tempting you close. "Come snuggle me." he flashes his puppy dog eyes when you don't move. "Please? I'll keep my banana in my pants."
You huff a tired laugh and shuffle over, collapsing into his arms. The couch is oddly comfortable which makes you moan and sink further into the softness.
"See?" he chimes.
"Yeah, yeah, okay, you win. The fruiton can stay," you murmur defeatedly into his chest.
He rumbles with a soft laugh. You can feel him thinking, and you bet his eyebrows are wiggling with his signature chaotic whimsy. "Now, how'sa 'bout we break it in, banana split style?"
Ozzie’s 11k birthday sleepover
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Lil' Corona Pedro 🖤
So excited for Pedro to be the face of Corona! 🍋🟩
Doodle Masterlist
Progress pics below:
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thank you em, i love you <3
Hello there... this one is even shorter than the Feb fic recs, but just like last time, these fics brought me joy and they deserve recognition and love!
If you decide to read a fic (any fic) don't forget to leave the author a reblog or comment! Supporting the creators is so important, show them all your love!!💜
when we go crashing down by @janaispunk
gonna make you sweat - (kinda)dark!javier peña x reader by @mypoisonedvine
baby powder - han solo x f!reader by @hanasnx
han solo x shy!reader by @ddejavvu
study break - bfd!Joel Miller x f!reader @rottenblur
If you've seen my Feb fic recs you know what I'm about to say lol :')
I'm posting this at the end of April AGAIN, but this is my official attempt to stay more up to date again from now on (hopefully lol) Thanks to everyone who writes amazing fics that help so many people, make them happy or just entertain them! And thanks to everyone who ever read one of them, keep supporting the amazing authors and creators here!🤍
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