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dontcallmeeds · 1 year

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Part 2 of Eddie Making Jewelry For Steve; Part 1 here / Part 3 here / Part 4 here

Steve had figured it out after the second little box that was left on the Family Video counter.

He didn’t see Eddie leave it, he was too involved in his conversation with Robin that happened to be about his panic surrounding Eddie.

See the thing is, he knew there were bisexual people and he knew he liked men for years.

But saying it outloud and falling for his best friend? Well, that was a whole other thing.

The way Steve figured it out was the handwriting on the little notes. It felt a little crazy comparing his Family Video card paperwork to the notes, but Robin was the one who suggested it.

Eddie looped his lowercase Es tightly, to the point they almost looked like Cs. And his Is were always lowercase with a circle instead of a dot.

It really just had to be him leaving the beautiful pieces that made Steve’s heart melt and his stomach fall out his ass. Although, he still had his doubts. There was no way his dream guy was just being that fucking perfect, that wasn’t usually how Steve’s life went.

But oh god did he sure have hope.

Steve thought he was being obvious that he knew, wearing the ring that he had fallen in love with in front of Eddie. He even fidgeted with it and caught Eddie staring at it before the other man quickly looked away.

He couldn’t help but tear up in the Beamer after the outing, asking Robin for advice only resulted in drunken living room karaoke, not a plan.

Steve tried to ask where he got his pieces once so maybe him and Robin could run surveillance like old times, but Eddie ended up being vague and elusive.

When Steve brought Nancy into the secret op, she suggested a stake out which felt like stalking. She started a board with dates and drop off locations and roughly estimated it was every 2-4 weeks on dates Steve was usually busy.

It was coming up on almost a month since the last drop and Steve was practically showing off with the last chain, making sure his polo was just open at top enough for Eddie to see.

The flushing across Eddie’s cheeks into his chest was everything, but still his metalhead said nothing.

It was time for Nancy’s plan.

Steve dropped days he’d be busy, watching as Eddie seemingly made a mental note of them. His feigned disappointment was shaky, Steve hoping he’d just blurt it out without confrontation.

But alas, nothing.

Nancy put on her ‘undercover journalism best’ aka a literally just a black sweater and black pants, borrowing her parents car instead of using her own. And I’m that moment Steve felt—

“Am I crazy? Is this whole thing crazy?” Steve paces the Family Video aisles between romance and comedy, which felt pretty fitting considering his love life was a joke.

Robin places a hand on his shoulder and gives him that all encompassing look between the fact that she thinks it’s completely sane, but also really fucking crazy.

“You want to know for sure, right? Not just the handwriting or little weird glances?”

Steve sighs and then nods slowly, he really did want to know for sure. But the problem is what came after.

“Okay then, we’ll just see what Nancy says then hmm? For all we know it could be a boring—“

As if on cue, the walkie they stole from the kids crackles.

“Steve—it’s for sure him, he just—“

“HE JUST WHAT?! WE NEED ANSWERS WHEELER,” Robin shouts into the speaker before Nancy can even finish, Steve grabs the walk-in out of her hand with a scoff.

“Say sorry to your eardrums for her Nance— so wait, what happened?” Steve tries to shove down his nerves, but his fingers on the device tremble.

“He leave something in your mailbox, do you want me to—“

“Steve, GO!”

He really needs to teach her what an inside voice is.

“Are you—“

“I’ll cover you, if Keith comes back I’ll—I’ll make up a dead aunt or say you ripped your pants, I don’t know! I’m not good under pressure, you know how I get Steve. Goddamnit, just go before I start rambling!”

Steve nods and handing her the walkie, running out the door. He knows he breaks the speed limit on the way home, knows if he gets pulled over he can just use the Hopper card. He normally wouldn’t, but extreme times and all that.

Nancy is pulled into the drive when he gets there, popping out when she sees him pull up next to the mailbox.

“Hey I wanted to stay, for you know, support,” she says with a small smile, seeming to enjoy this all way too much.

“Nance, you didn’t have to—“

“Yes I did, Steve. Now fucking open it before me and Robs burst a blood vessel.”

Steve nervously chuckles, his fingers twitching on the mailbox door before pulling it down to a little red box.

‘Stevie, something different,’ is all it reads.

He shares a glance with Nancy, before pulling it out.

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minjintea · 1 year

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This started out as a comedic thought where it went a bit like this but then I started imagining the actual scenario:

Oblivious Bi!Steve: maybe I could kiss you if you want to make sure you're bi too

Questioning but self-aware!Eddie: cool, man.

*they kiss tenderly*

Steve: *reeling from how good it was* so what do you think?

Eddie: *already accepted that he has a crush and is opportunistic* we should kiss again just to make sure

they make out and then pine after each other

(start of the ficlet ig)

Already knows he's bi!Steve helping Eddie with his sexuality crisis via kissing him bc Eddie half-joked that maybe he could kiss Steve just to be sure he liked guys. And very seriously Steve asked if it would help while all Eddie could do was give a nod, in shock and confused with the fact that this is happening. Steve says they can do it now while tilting his head like he's preparing for a kiss and waits for Eddie to initiate it bc it's his sexuality crisis not Steve's and he wants Eddie to at his own pace. Eddie internally panics but psychs himself up bc he wants this and wouldn't want to waste a chance to kiss Steve bc even if he isn't sure he like men, he sure as hell knows that he finds Steve attractive. So he just goes for it and Steve's eyes flutter shut while Eddie tries to make the most of this experience. He brushes his fingers through Steve's cheek, runs it through his hair, and then cups his hand the around the back of his neck. Steve makes a small noise bc the kiss so gentle he feels absolutely treasured and loved and it makes him feel a little breathless. Eddie takes that as a sign to break away and the stared at each other for a while before Steve breaks the silence

"so did you find you find your answer?"

And Eddie, looking like he had a revelation, replies with

"I think we should kiss again just to make sure"

And it was that day Eddie realized he was definitely in love with Steve and the day Steve started viewing Eddie as a love interest

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #oblivious bi steve harrington #questioning but self-aware eddie munson #might write it more cohesively later

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missingexaltation · 1 year

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Alternative 'Steve coming to terms with being Bi' idea:

(The queer community isn't perfect, there's a lot of infighting that's not obvious on the surface level. A lot of bi/pan/ace people get sneered at by gay/lesbian people even now, and in the 80s it was worse.)

After Vecna, Eddie tells Steve he had and still has a crush on him, but as he's aware that Steve's straight, he's going to stop flirting with him because he doesn't want to make Steve uncomfortable. Eddie will get over it eventually, but he wants 'to be friends so please don't hate me, Stevie, I'm trying to stop'. For some reason that hurts Steve and he can't stop thinking about it. For a few weeks, while Eddie's being his usual boisterous self, Steve just watches and thinks.

Eventually, he tells Robin how he feels, that he thinks he likes Eddie and wants to try being with him because they get on great, and he's nice, and kind of good looking, and why not? He's not used to being subtle about asking people out, so figures he might as well see if Eddie wants to actually date him.

Robin is shocked but then SO happy that he's gay too. But when Steve says that he's not, that he still likes women, she gets annoyed. Being gay is a big deal to her, and she feels like Steve would rather date someone he's not attracted to, just so that he's not single/lonely. 'Maybe I just like Eddie, he has long hair, I dunno?' 'That's not a thing, Steve!'

Steve has no idea, and after his shift, when he's alone, he melts down about it and genuinely wonders if he's deluding himself. Maybe he is 'fully gay', maybe he's desperate for love from anyone. He thinks he likes Eddie, so was he lying to himself before? Did he love Nancy, or did he just want to love her? It doesn't quite fit, and it takes him a long time to get to grips with who he is, and he spirals a bit because he realises that actually he has no real sense of identity in general. He doesn't know what he wants in the future in ANY capacity.

During a movie night with the older teens, it's Argyle (bizarrely) that vaguely states that he finds both the make/female lead actors hot, and it's the catalyst for Steve actually figuring himself out. He doesn't talk to anyone at all about it. He thinks and thinks and thinks, and just comes to terms with it. He did love Nancy, he does find girls attractive, but he also wants to make out with Eddie. (He also thinks that guy in that labyrinth film is kinda hot.)

So he bites the bullet and does what he wanted to do originally. He asks Eddie out, and Eddie's immediately like 'uh HELL yes', feeling like he's won the jackpot. And after a few weeks of vaguely secretive dating (ie making out at Eddie's new house), Steve settles into 'liking both', and tells Robin. He's much more confident this time, now that he's tried and knows he likes both.

Turns out Robin's been thinking about it too, and when Steve tells her about him and Eddie, she's apologetic for trying to tell him who he is. She points out that she'd have hated it, if it was the other way around. She's been looking into it, and come to the same conclusion. Steve was right, he can 'like both'. They have another soft little moment before she brutally mocks him for his taste in men.

(Eddie, meanwhile, has no idea how much soul searching Steve and Robin have been through. He's walking on air, just ecstatic that The Steve Harrington is his boyfriend.)

#eddie munson #steve harrington #robin buckley #steddie #there's so many 'this is what you are Steve' fics and it drives me mad because that's not how it works #Robin means well but she's also a teen in a shitty phobic town with barely any info and only her own experiences to judge from #Steve's just in a permanent state of confusion but he can't stop thinking about Eddie's hands and puppy dog eyes #also...they're all very young still so they try their best but for all intents and purposes they're all still figuring stuff out #stobin is such a great friendship but fanon makes them a bit too nice to each other without any of the fuck ups #also Steve advocating for himself is such an underrated and underused trope #stobin #unlabeled Argyle is also a fave of mine...he's just too chill and cool to care...equality for all 💙#tw: mild biphobia

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atmilliways · 9 months

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I want to read an absolute clusterfuck of fake dating miscommunication where Steve asked Eddie to fake date in order to show Will it's okay to be gay.

Now, this is patently ridiculous. (And I absolutely adore reading fics in which it happens anyway.) Eddie is so aware of how ridiculous it is that he takes it for a flimsy excuse for Steve to ask him out. And, well. Steve is hot, thoughtful, delightfully bitchy, and sometimes a kind of a bonehead, but ultimately a good guy. Eddie could do worse. So he accepts.

As far as Eddie is concerned, the relationship is actually real; the "fake" part is just a pretense, like gay training wheels. Kind of a dumb way for Steve, who's used to heterosexual relationships where the rules and roles are more or less clearly defined, to talk about comfort levels and boundaries and shit, but everybody has to start somewhere. It's not like Eddie has ever really dated before so, like, whatever.

But Steve is actually serious. He really wants Will to feel more optimistic about his romantic future, and has thrown his whole ass into this dipshit idea. He's relieved that Eddie agrees, because Will lights up even more every time the kid sees them together, even though they keep it subtle enough that the rest of the kids don't pick up on it and out them to all of Hawkins with their loud mouths that can't keep secrets. (Ahem, Dustin.)

Robin was not let in on this plan, because Steve has gotten too used to the nearly supernatural way they can talk using only facial expressions and vibes. If she's acting a little weird, it's because she's miffed that he didn't tell her about his bisexual awakening. (Which he has not, in fact, had. Yet.)

Nancy has a sneaking suspicion that something is going on, but she's missing 99% of the context here and has never really thought about people being gay before. She decides to investigate why Steve and Eddie are suddenly so close, getting incredibly mixed signals from both of them and even Robin when she asks her. (Over the course of the story Nancy also goes through her own private journey of gradually realizing that she might be bi, and that maybe she should break up with Jonathan and spend some time alone to figure out wtf she wants, who she even is as a person now that both high school and the Upside Down problems are over.)

Jonathan just wants to find a way to balance having shit tolerance no matter how long he smokes and using weed to self-medicate for the back pain from being brutally KO'd with a chair in season three. Argyle just wants to help him, make pizza, and chill.

Maybe it all comes to a head like that one Thanksgiving episode of Friends where everyone just kind of explodes. They each shout whatever is topmost on their mind at each other, leaving Joyce standing in the middle of the room like, "... That is a lot of information to get in thirty seconds," then snapping into Mom Mode and responding to each of them in turn. For Steve and Eddie it's like getting their heads knocked together to end a fight only, you know, nicely.

I just. I want to read about all of them being so dumb and no one knows what's going on.

#steddie brainrot #jean rambles #what if a fic

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lupon · 1 year

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I agree that Mike still hasn't had a realization moment, the moment he realizes will be the moment when the audience realizes at the same time imho, and tbh Mike's situation seems to be a parallel to Nancy's situation in the love triangle. Ofc the difference here is that Mike and Will have a mlm storyline, but the love triangle positioning is the same. Nancy thought he liked Steve and while she has some sort of an attraction towards him, she came to realize in S2 that she liked Jonathan instead. They are conditioned to be more compatible in terms of being in a relationship. And most 'Mike already knows he is gay/bi' readings stem from the S3 finale scene, but that moment seemed to be more about Mike being stunned and it inserting a *doubt* to the scene like you said, it's not about him realizing his sexuality or his feelings for Will. I feel like the way the writers are approaching this situation is making Mike and El's romance as a past thing (like Steve and Nancy's thing) and them portraying Mike and Will as a likelier and more compatible option (like Jonathan and Nancy). It seems like they're gonna give Mike a realization moment after El breaks up with him, and he'll have a moment similar to Nancy's in S2. And my controversial opinion here is that I think Mike will be easier to accept his sexuality and will be the one to act on his feelings easier, and that the writers won't portray him as secretly gay since I seriously do not think they're planning on completely discarding Mike and El's romantic relationship, but they're rather planning to make them incompitable and a past romance.

THISSSS 10000% agree. I don't think the "big bad" of Mike's story is internalized homophobia, I think it's change. I used to be a hard-core gay Mike truther, but now that just doesn't make sense to me anymore. Mike and El did love each other, but they just don't make a compatible couple. Their relationship problems aren't caused by Mike's awareness that he isn't in love with her, it's that they're just different people with different interests who want different things out of a relationship.

Same with S2 Nancy and Steve. Steve didn't realize that he was unintentionally hurting Nancy by trying to pretend they were normal or saying they shouldn't try and speak out about what the lab did to Barb. And Nancy thought she was in love with Steve, until she started hanging out Jonathan, who actually listened to her concerns, was able to understand how she felt, and aided her in getting the justice Barb deserved. I definitely think Byler is going to be a lot more like that.

I can totally see where people got the idea Mike's self-aware. But the more I'm looking at the scene, the more I think it's actually pointed a lot more toward showing how he's stuck in denial out of fear of things being different from what he's used to. "I've been stuck in one place" "If I'm being really honest, that's what scares me. I don't want thing to change" "That's why I came in here, to try and maybe stop that change" "Turn back the clock, make things go back to how they were" Him not being saying ily to El or kissing her back was a sign of him starting to doubt his feelings. Hopper's letter was honing in on the fact that he doesn't like the change he's feeling. He wants things to be normal. He's scared of what could happen to himself and his relationships if he accepts change.

I'm glad I'm finally finding some like-minded people out of this.

#bi mike wheeler #byler #mike wheeler

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xenon-demon · 9 months

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I SAW JEALOUSY, JEALOUSY AND RAN OVER PLEASE DO TELL ME MORE (⁠☆⁠▽⁠☆⁠)

HELLO SAILS I LOVE THAT CONCEPT SO MUCH I'M SO GLAD YOU ASKED :D

I saw a tiktok... probably about 10 months ago now talking about how Canon Steve has Straight Leading Man Syndrome™ (aka he's the manly cool guy who is written to be So Cool and So Masculine in a way that loops back around into him having some Baggage around being the platonic ideal of a Straight Man™ that reads as very queer) and how this means the writers would never allow Steve to be bi despite how well it fits his character. SOMEHOW thinking about that tiktok turned into a 5+1 about 5 times Eddie made Steve feel jealous, and 1 time Steve does something about it.

The 5+1 roughly pans out as follows:

Steve being jealous of how Eddie is so unapologetically himself (set during their high school days, when Eddie is being Like That and Steve is still suffering under the weight of the King Steve mask)

Jealousy over Dustin having a Cool New Brother Figure Friend (complete with some internal musings about how Eddie is - at least from Steve's perspective before knowing him - who Steve wants to be; self-assured, doesn't care what people think, liked by the people Steve wants to like him)

Jealous of how Eddie is well aware of his sexuality and comfortable acting on his attraction to men (post-Vecna; they're Friends now and Eddie comes out to Steve, Steve is Not Accepting of his own bisexuality yet but definitely knows there's Something going on there, especially with how he feels when he hangs out with Eddie)

Traditional jealousy; Eddie comes back from a weekend trip to Indy with hickies and Steve is SO NORMAL ABOUT IT. This is when he realizes oh shit, he's definitely bi, and definitely into Eddie.

Jealousy about how Eddie knows things about the queer community (like where to find gay bars in Indy, and the basics of the hanky code); this is set after Steve comes out to Eddie as bi (but does not confess his feelings due to a fear of rejection) and Eddie is like "hmm okay would you like to come to a gay bar with me then?" and Steve agrees.

THE BIG ONE: At the gay bar, Eddie hits it off with a guy and Steve gets So Worked Up watching them make out that he pulls Eddie away from the guy and makes it Super Obvious how he feels, and Eddie goes "thank fuck I was doing this on purpose to make you jealous so you'd make a move". They bone about it and live happily ever after <3

Essentially it's a nice mix of jealousy in the traditional, I'm-in-love-with-you-and-mad-you're-kissing-other-people sense and jealousy as a vehicle for musings on who Steve is and who he wants to become, especially post-character development. I like this concept So Much even if I'm unsure when I'll ever actually get around to writing it lmao.

Send me an ask about my WIPs!

#charlie writes things #wip games #steddie #also this concept was cooked up during the early stages of steddie fandom when there were some Widespread Truths and you can definitely tel #like this just Reads like a steddie fic from summer/autumn last year yknow???#also it features 'eddie as steve's bi awakening' which is a concept i'm allergic to writing now lmao #i'll definitely read it but at this point i vastly prefer writing steve as Knowing he's bi by the time he falls for eddie

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shopcat · 10 months

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this is so nitpicky but jumping off of everything you’ve already said so well, what gets me every fucking time is in addition to not being able to be self aware of his own attraction without Robin to hand hold him through it, the classic steve-is-dumb joke “wait what was that word again? bi-cycle?” as if he can’t even remember a straightforward word from one second to the next. homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual - it’s not wildly unfamiliar, it’s such a cheap ‘joke’ but steve is just so painfully dumb it’s obviously going to confuse him! I’ve seen this several times and I’m so over it

oh yeah people will use any excuse they can to lean into ableism with him in particular but it's particularly demeaning when it's something like this i'm genuinely surprised i haven't seen anyone do the "bi means two but but i like more than two people..?" thing with him yet 😭 and then you get people coming from a good place i assume at least who are trying to defend him and ending up equating the idea of disability with something as silly or contrived as "mischaracterisation". steve isn't brain damaged Silly he's a smart smart boy look he can read!! 😑

#asks #lol remember when someone rb'd my autism poll for him and was like ''he's my brain damaged baby girl'' brah #sts

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notquiteaghost · 1 year

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once again i am not watching stranger things s4 i am not writing stranger things fic i am simply putting this idea out into the universe. i am manifesting. what if steve/nancy/jonathan + steve/eddie polycule but it's the steddie that's established

like. as in show, steve & nancy date, steve & nancy break up, nancy & jonathan date, steve is fine it's cool it's not weird he's fine, cue eddie. except,

steve harrington realised he likes boys when jonathan byers clocked him in an alley, repressed that because he Had A Girlfriend, then he didn't have a girlfriend. his girlfriend was, in fact, now dating the boy who punched him into a sexuality crisis. so why bother not admitting to himself he likes guys too when he's busy trying to quit doing something far more pathetic (pining hopelessly for his ex and her new bf)?

meaning, by s4, steve and eddie get together with only 'traumatising near-death experiences' and 'debilitating self worth issues' and 'general teenage boy idiocy' as stumbling blocks. not smooth sailing, but they get there. they're good. they're good!

eddie learns to read steve. eddie hears about the great bi awakening afternoon violence. the byers visit hawkins; eddie sees steve around jonathan&nancy. eddie knows damn well what a lovesick steve harrington looks like

eddie gets steve alone (difficult, when the byers are only visiting, and there is limited jonathan time available) (robin is still nearby, because eddie was already well-aware he does not have sole custody of steve's affections) and says "you know you're not subtle, right?" and steve blanches white and eddie adds "no, sweetheart, i don't mind. or, well, i do, but only 'cause i love you and watching you pine like this is painful. actually, physically painful"

and steve says "alright, no need to rub it in, asshole" and eddie rolls his eyes and says "you dated nancy for over a year, you've got regular phone dates with jonathan, they are absolutely into you"

and that is as far as i can take this concept with my incomplete s4 knowledge. but you get where i'm going, yeah? what if your wingman is your boyfriend, and also he's trying to set you up with your ex, and somehow? this works???

#yelling at clouds #stranger things #i want ''well obviously they're not interested anymore'' angst but eddie is there #i want eddie making friends with nancy & nancy thinks it's just him using the one thing they have in common #but then he's like. Isn't Steve great? Don't you think Steve is so great? Don't you want to date Steve

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multiverseofimagines · 2 years

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Begging for ship request 🙏

I'm an asexual (but in love with sensuality) bi girl with no specific preferences. I'm drawn to both genders equally. I'm INFJ and my zodiac sign is Aquarius. I'm an antisocial introvert with a melancholy disposition. Among people I don't know, I'm a bit shy, withdrawn, slightly stiff. At the very beginning you can experience many awkward situations with me. I need time to trust other person and open up more. Among friends I'm more confident, less withdrawn and more laid back. I'm generally calm, forbearing, modest, kind, sensitive, but also impatient, lazy, and slightly cowardly. I have troubles with showing deep feelings. I listen more, talk less. I often act as a private psychologist, but when worrying about someone else's problems overburden me and tires me, I can unfortunately burst into anger. I'm usually organized, I'm trying stay out of troubles, and sometimes sacrifice my comfort for someone or a given situation just to stay in a so-called "safe soap bubble". I'm aware that this means that I can never learn to live, suffer great harm, never gain experience - and when I'll be at the very end, I'll experience it twice as hard as I even should. I'm a little scared of it, but nvm. I don't know how it is to be in relationship. I've never loved anyone, no one has ever loved me. I try to get good grades in school, although I'm not one of the most intelligent people. I can be jealous of someone's achievements, which I react to by hiding in the corner of my house, crying and blaming myself for being insufficient and not being able to have the same things as others have.

What do I like? Watching movies and series, especially the romantic ones, most often with lgbt+ threads. Reading fanfiction about ships. Listening to music: I have a weakness for various types of metal (apart from black metal, because I'm discouraged by it), more of the one created since 2000, now I'm just starting with classics; moreover, I like trap soul. Drinking sweet coffee. Eating spicy food. Eating sweets, especially for breakfast on an empty stomach (dumb, Ikr). Taking warm baths in the tub. I love it when someone plays with my hair or runs their hands over my back. Platypus and elks. Nice and shapely hands. Long sleep. Trips to places I haven't been to before. Compliments in my direction, which can build my low self-esteem. Thinking, pondering the problems of the external world and people, making reflections. Sometimes I like to dream, to look ahead. Listen to low voices or whispers.

I ship you with….

Robin Buckley

Robin can probably relate to your introversion and the awkwardness of starting a friendship or relationship.

She’s open, and honest and I feel as though that’s something you value. She would also be the most open to you being Asexual, I don’t think she would care much nor pressure you.

You guys would bond over love of movies and music. Movie dates would be an often occurrence.

She’s bad with emotions, and doesn’t know how to help when you breakdown but she definitely tries her best for you. Sometimes she’ll ramble, and end up distracting you/making you laugh.

I feel like you two would become fast friends despite both of your introverted tendencies. She says whatever comes to mind and that makes it a lot easier for you to let loose a little. She really opens you up.

She would love to play with your hair, I feel like Robin isn’t a huge touch person, at least for people to herself, but she loves those little touches, the ones that don’t make her flinch or uncomfy. Hand holding, hair touching and light soft touches upon the back. (She’s def not a huge hug person)

She always has coffee for you when Steve and Her pick you up, she lets you borrow one of her thermos mugs, she makes sure its sweet, filled with coffee flavouring (she has a soft spot for hazlenut and vanilla.)

She loves how often you help the people around you, but is brutal honest in telling you that your spending too much time on other peoples feelings rather than your own. She grounds you in a reality you never thought was possible before.)

(sorry if this is short, I just had surgery 💗)

Look-Book

I feel as though your a person who optimizes comfort, over, overall fashion. You definitely are a creative, and into aesthetics, but I feel like your also the type of person that gets overstimulated easily, and doesn’t like to be centre of attention. You come off laid back, but your also a perfectionist, and have a lack of confidence. I feel like you would choose outfits that not only self preserve this idea of being studious, and quiet, but also laidback, and comfortable. You definitely have a tendency to hide behind your clothes and style, and Robin is extremely similar. She likes little tokens, touchstones in her wardrobe, necklaces, and rings but her overall look is very laid back and introverted.

Playlist

#stranger things #stranger things imagine #stranger things headcanons #robin buckley imagine #robin buckley #robin buckley ship #stranger things ship #multiverseofimagines ships

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morose-magnetrix · 2 years

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Marauders Annual by Steve Orlando (writer), Creees Hyunsung Lee (artist), and Rain Beredo (colorist)

Daken: “To gutting predators like Love [...] “

Kate Pryde: “To always going where we’re needed, not where we’re wanted.”

Steve Orlando makes his debut as the new writer of Marauders hot off the success of the Darkhold mini event. While the new artist Eleonora Carlini has yet to join the crew, Creees Hyunsung Lee does a fantastic job depicting Captain Kate Pryde and her new crew.

Much like how the final issue of Duggan’s Marauders felt very much reflective and self-aware of the difficulty of juggling the business of Hellfire Trading with the mission of mutant rescue, Orlando’s Marauders sets its mission statement on focusing on the second aim, with Christian Frost stepping up as the Red Monarch to deal with the Hellfire Trading business. The focus of this issue is the rescue of Daken, after he’s been captured by Brimstone Love and the Theater of Pain. By the end of the book, he - along with Psylocke, Somnus, Aurora, and Tempo - have joined Bishop and Kate to form the new team of Marauders. It really is a fresh start - a new creative team, a new cast, a new ship, and a new mission.

However, while the struggle against Brimstone Love is on the surface level an example of mutant rescue, Orlando also uses his antagonist as an ability to speak to some of the major criticisms of Krakoa. If you’ve been reading any Internet chatter about Krakoa, you have probably heard fan complaints about how the X-Men are villains now, how they’ve become supremacists and isolationists, how they’ve betrayed everything they ever stood for. Brimstone Love makes these same points and is, quite literally, a bad faith actor. He manipulates and lies, using slipperly slope and strawman arguments to make his point. The Marauders refute these claims. Brimstone Love’s entranced minions make arguments that often boil down to - “I was a human, I fought for mutant rights, and now you’ve abandoned me and I need you to feel the pain that I feel.” It’s easy to see how ridiculous a sentiment this is, as if the mutants have to feel grateful and indebted that some humans ‘fought for mutant rights.’ It would be like if I, a queer person, were told that moving to a predominately queer neighborhood and living with other queer people had betrayed my straight friends who had been proud allies. But ultimately, the people making those arguments in bad faith aren’t really allies - they’re narcissists, convinced that we need them to be saved, that we couldn’t do it on our own.

Brimstone Love does have, on the other hand, some mutant supporters. These mutants are convinced that Krakoa is not for all mutants - that a hierarchy will form, based on how beautiful a mutant is, how useful their powers are, etc etc. This argument I think is something worth exploring deeper, as on the surface, they aren’t wrong. The X-Men are all beautiful people who can pass as human. The Quiet Council is all gorgeous and mostly human passing - but even those who cannot pass as human are still pretty, they aren’t what some might consider ugly. But examining the story so far, there’s no direct evidence for the evolution of this sentiment - and so, this too is a belief made in bad faith. Maybe they’re right and that will happen one day, but it’s a logical fallacy that they’re clinging to.

This issue is really fun - particularly with the establishment of the new team. Tempo seems to have an almost Quicksilver like problem of just not having patience for things around her - as she fast forwards through her own life. Kwannon seems to be ready to rededicate herself to protection of those who cannot save themselves after the loss of her daughter. Somnus is a man who lived a normal life and is ready for excitement. Daken is a beautiful disaster bi as always - and Aurora is my queen.

Verdict: Eight out of ten mysterious boxes with Kate’s name

#marauders annual #marauders #kate pryde #bishop #tempo #somnus #daken #aurora #brimstone love #psylocke #kwannon

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lilxberry · 3 years

Text

The Glitch: Chapter Three

Synopsis;

Wanda certainly had attracted the newest Avenger. Y/N’s usual overconfident façade seems to easily drop when around the Sokovian witch.

Warnings: Language. Mention of memory loss.

Words: 939

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Reader, Avengers x Reader

< CHAPTER 2 CHAPTER 4 >

_______________

It had been a week since Y/N joined the team, 6 days since she moved into the tower and roughly 24 hours since she met a certain Sokovian brunette who had been away on a mission during Y/N’s initial arrival at the tower. She was made aware of the not-so-present Avenger after the team had officially welcomed her and exchanged introductions.

Their first encounter happened as Peter and Y/N were training together, the duo conversing as they sparred.

--- flashback ---

“C’mon kid, you gotta tell me about this girl ya like.” Y/N grunted out as she threw a punch towards the teen.

“I’ll tell you after you tell me how you know how to fight like you do. I mean, you weren’t an Avenger when the bank had been hit. Where’d you learn?” Peter had swiftly dodged her hit and continued to dance around the matt. Y/N and Peter had quickly bonded over the week, already forming a sibling-like relationship with each other.

The older girl huffed as she quickly ducked under his leg before replying. “’Kay, that’s fair. But we’re taking a break. You people train to damn fuckin’ much.” She exhaled shakily as she broke her fighting stance and proceed to lie on the matt, closed eyes pointed towards the ceiling.

“I’m not really sure how I know how to fight. I don’t really remember much from before two years ago. I think I might have taken self defence classes when I was a kid, I dunno.” She peeked an eye open to glance at the boy and noticed that he had sat down next to laying form to listen to her speak.

She continued before she could be given a response on the topic of her not remembering much. ‘I was in an accident or something surely? Right? I’d know if I could FUCKING REMEMBER.’ She quickly contemplated in her mind.

“Anyways, it would be more concerning if I DIDN’T know how to fight considering I’m a young, hot woman who lived on her own.” She smirked as Peter laughed at her attempt at making the conversation more humour-ess.

Peter calmed down significantly with a shake of his head. He stood up and brushed his hands down the front of his joggers. “Water?”

“Please.”

As he walked off to collect a drink for both of them, Y/N decided to sit herself up and cross her legs over each other at the ankles, leaning back on the flat palms of her hands. She had heard the door open and assumed that the kid had returned with refreshments, not giving it much thought. Although, the sweet, strong accent that spoke in place of Peter’s caused her to turn to look at the door and find the owner.

“I’m assuming you’re the new girl Steve told me about while we were debriefing.” The what could only be described as the most beautiful woman in all of existence had voiced, her hand on her popped out hip, her weight on one foot.

As Y/N finally landed her eyes upon her, her mind had been placed into overdrive. ‘HOLY FUCK, SHE’S HOT!’

Wanda had shifted her weight slightly as her face had flushed a dangerous shade of red. What Y/N didn’t know was that the girl who stood in the entrance of the training room opposite her sitting form could peer into the minds of others, though she hadn’t needed to pry as her thoughts had been too loud to simply ignore.

Y/N cleared her throat and quickly scrambled to stand, tripping over herself slightly. “Y-Yeah, hey, hi, I’m Y/N.” After a moment of thinking, she quickly surged forward with her arm stretched out in front of her body, flushed and glistening with a thin coating of sweat.

“Wanda.” Wanda had sent her a kind smile, shaking her hand, giggling softly at the girl before her.

‘God, she’s even prettier up close.’ Y/N had lost herself within her thoughts, which Wanda had yet again overseen, as she not-so-subtly gawked at her, continuing to hold on to Wanda’s hand.

Wanda had become flustered yet again, quickly pulling her hand back and looking away, which seemed to have snapped Y/N out of her trance. “Sorry.” Y/N spoke bashfully, placing her own hand on the back of her neck, running her hand across the skin as she smiled sheepishly at her, her eyes crinkling up at the edges.

“It’s uhm-it’s okay. I’ll uh-see you l-later.” It was Wanda’s turn to fumble over her words as she hastily exited the room, making sure to keep her head down to hide the blush that was so prominently evident across her face.

“Uh-yeah. SEE YA!” Y/N shouted towards the girl who, quite literally, ran from her, leaving her confused by her sudden departure yet dazed by her beauty. “What the fuck was that...” She mumbled quietly as flashes of the Avengers’ face.

At that point, Peter had returned with 4 bottles of water, surely over estimating how thirsty the two really were, which he dropped instantly as Y/N had exclaimed loudly towards him.

“PETER! TELL ME EVERYTHING ABOUT WANDA!”

“WHAT THE FUCK, Y/N!”

--- end of flashback ---

Y/N lounged around in her room, remembering the, simply put, weird encounter, groaning loudly. ‘Of course she can read minds.’ Closing her eyes for a moment, Y/N continued to lie there atop her bed in silence before a loud monstrous growl emitted from her abdomen.

She huffed as she sat up and swung her legs over the edge of the bed. ‘I can hide shamefully after getting something to eat.’

“Now, which snacks am I in the mood for?”

_______________

@a-really-bi-girl @melancholymaz

So, I’ve finally started to get the romance going with Wanda lmao

I’m honestly in love with Wanda so I’m kinda glad I started writing this as a Wanda x Reader

I know this chapter was shorter than usual but I have plans for the story so it’s all good (next chapter is gonna be in Wanda’s POV)

If you’d like to be tagged in future chapters, let me know

I hope you enjoy this. Please like if you do as it will help me reach more people

As always, constructive criticism and requests are welcomed and greatly appreciated :D

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maccreadysimp · 3 years

Text

breaking down this anti-ian article bc it bothers me ( from the child of a bipolar mother and a male teen with same sex attraction ) while also providing valid reasons ian sucks ( from someone who likes ian )

ive had this drafted for a while so i dont think i cover anything from season 11

tw for i^cest and r^pe

he was with a married man

in this point it points out that he was with kash and he continued his relationship with kash even after linda put cameras in the store

“Ian didn't seem to care about how wrong his affair with Kash was or how much it could hurt Kash's wife Linda, whom he saw at the store regularly. “

that is a quote from that part.

ian gallagher was fifteen in season one, kash was an older man who bought him gifts and payed attention to ian ,, that was not on ian , none of that was ian fault because he was a child

ian wasnt open with lip

“ Ian didn't tell Lip about his preferences and forced Lip to figure it out on his own. Lip was instantly accepting of his brother's truth and even offered to help him figure out any confusion he might be harboring, so it's really strange that Ian wasn't just upfront with his closest confidant from the start.”

no , lip wasnt forced to figure it out on his own and he also wasn’t instantly accepting.

in this point it mentions that ‘they’re extremely close ( bestfriends and brothers ) so its strange ian didnt tell him’

like point 1 , ian is a fifteen year old boy, growing up on the southside , and thoughout the show it has mentioned multiple times that the southside isnt that accepting

back to lip -- lip wasnt accepting, sure he was fine but ‘helping your younger brother figure it out’ by having a (female) classmate give him a blowjob isnt helping

he secretly dated his best friends brother

“Most friends have an unspoken rule about not dating each other's siblings, but Ian broke this rule by secretly entering into a relationship with Mandy's closeted brother Mickey.”

the only thing i have to say about this is , he was still with kash and mickey was a boy in his age group who was gay , growing up in the southside ian probably thought he was the token gay so of course hes going to chase after mickey

he stood by as kash attacked mickey

“Ian didn't do anything to stop Kash from shooting his new lover, and didn't even tell the police about his boss' over-the-top display of jealous action so proper justice could be served.”

okay. because two men he had fallen for had gotten into a fight, there was a gun involved and he panicked, in the end after mickey got shot he went to him

now to address the quote, he didnt say anything to the police because he probably knew that that would bring shame onto kash and his family, along with mickey and his family who are very homophobic

oh yeah and it was like 2011 and cops suck and THEY LIVE ON THE SOUTHSIDE

he and lip tried framing terry milkovich

oh the homophobic and racist dad of his boyfriend and bestfriend who tried to kill him and r*ped his daughter ?

yeah , shit man , that was real bad they shouldn’t have done that /s

he dated jimmy-steves married father

“Ian didn't bother telling Jimmy the truth about his father and didn't end his relationship with Lloyd upon finding out that he had a secret wife and family, either.”

at this point ian is probably sixteen but that doesnt matter bc i wont even address that

he met him at a club and then used his relationship with ned to make mickey jealous which was one of the reasons he kept seeing him, he didnt tell jimmy-steve about the relationship or his father bc he shouldnt find out from him he should find out from his father , again like kash, ned was an older man who payed attention to ian and ned later did develop feelings feelings for ian

he stole lips identity to enlist in the army

he enlisted because he didnt know what to do with himself, its implied/stated that the army timeline was the start of his bipolar

“While impersonating Lip, Ian had tried to steal a helicopter and then proceeded to go AWOL.”

this is because of the bipolar he suffers from, it is referenced later in the series after he gets back and hes manic

ian refused to accept being bipolar

of course he didnt accept it, it is made very clear that his family thinks lowly of monica so of course if hes the lucky duck to get what his siblings demonize her for, of course he’ll not want to be it

“He refused to take medications that could alter his personality or mood.”

okay. this is why im making this whole post, this goes along with part 15 ( or so idk ) ,,

my mother , my dear mother, who is bipolar and doesnt take her meds because they are mood altering , my mom doesnt take med because she told me once that they make her feel like shit, she told me that a little after i was born she started taking them but realized she felt nothing, she felt nothing for my dad or for i ( making her numb )

she told me anti deppresents dont help either because when shes on them and manic it pushes her past productive and into angry

my dad told me that when my mom was on bi polar medication she would seem angry most of the time

he wasnt faitful to mickey

“Ian's bipolar disorder made him very reckless and impulsive and led him to be unfaithful.”

lets break that down.

ians. bipolar. disorder.

this plot point i actually didnt like, mainly bc ian never addresses it so ill give the article a point. but then i take away 2 because they have more of a problem with his bipolar messing with him rather than the fact he never apologized and they never worked it out

ian stole yevgeny

before i start quoting i should mention because his boyfriend, who has supported and helped him is suddenly telling him he needs help, he was helping raise yev so he’ll see yev as his own

“Ian failed to recognize just how crazy he was acting...”

cuting you off right there , he was in a bipolar state, he wasnt ‘crazy’ and isnt ‘crazy’

he cant even keep count of his number of partners

just slutshaming i see

he helped throw frank off a bridge

“His relationship with Frank was understandably never the same after that, as Frank struggled to get over this act of betrayal and cruelty.”

‘was never the same after that’ frank never liked ian, ian was probably his least favorite and that point is very apparent

also , it wasnt just ian , his siblings and his boyfriend caleb

he left a healthy relationship to be with mickey

he fell in love with mickey at 15 , mickey was a comfort and always someone to fall back on, when mickey was taken away and no longer in the picture his heart still obviously was with mickey and when mickey came back he didnt know what to do

he told mickey he had a boyfriend but because mickey has been such a constant in his life he finally has back of course he couldnt resist

he liked trevor, i could tell he did but trevor wasnt the one he watched get r^ped by a russian prostitute, he wasnt the one ian was secretly dating bc it would be a death wish other wise, he wasnt the one there when ian was manic or depressive ( at the start )

he tried blackmailing an old client for money

“Instead of raising the money in an honest manner, Ian chose to visit an old client from his time working at the Fairy Tail and blackmail him into funding the shelter.”

because he felt indebted to trevor and wanted to make it up to him, it would have taken longer to do it in ‘an honest manner’ when his sister would have gotten it instead, he knew how much gay youths like he once was needed a safe place

“He grew up wanting to be nothing like his father, but this whole money-making scheme was straight out of the Frank playbook”

because thats all he knows, he grew up with that ‘playbook’ so of course hes going to take a page out of it, he is nothing like frank , franks money making schemes are selfish and for his own greed while ian wanted the money to help build a safe space for lgbt youth

he let fame inflate his ego

of course he did, hes a southside kid who was destined to fail

also it is very apparent that during the gay jesus era he went off his medication which didnt help

“Before long, he just completely forgot about his ex and focused solely on being a deity”

as much as yes, he did let it mess with his head, he was trying to still help lgbt youth and was going against anti gay churchs , in the end it didnt work out for him because he was off his meds and went over board

he stopped taking his meds

see previous point and ‘ian refused to accept being bipolar’

he actually wanted to stay in prison

because he was doing good in there

ian was helping others and was spreading awareness about lgbt with in the prison , and as him and jail scenes go , we can see people were listening to him and he was trying to make it safe sane and consensual

he let down his army of followers

“Ian admitted that most of his actions were completely irrational and the mere results of his bipolar disorder.”

he didnt want to, we can see this, because he knew he would let down everyone, his family were the only ones to ever ground him and they knew it would be the best option for his own mental health

during the gallavich wedding we can see that a lot of his supporters still have his back because they must know how hard it was for him to put all of that success on something he can’t control

he constantly wasted his potential

this is actually the only point in this article i actually agree with , so only 1/20 i agree with

his relationship with mickey wasn’t actually great

“Mickey spent the first several years of their relationship denying his feelings for Ian.”

he was raised by a homophobic and racist father who he knew would react the way he did when terry had caught the two that one day

“Even after he finally embraced his true self, Ian's bipolar disorder kept them from becoming truly happy together.”

yes but mickey was there for him the entire time and helped him through it, he told him he loved him which was really big for him and did his best to care for him

“They couldn't seem to remain faithful to each other for more than a few weeks.”

back to the point about ians bipolar but for mickey he wanted monogamy , now that scene in s11 may say otherwise but it is very clear that he wants a monogamous relationship with ian and ian ( after getting help ) wants one too, and in the later seasons they are monogamous

“When Mickey asked Ian to run away to Mexico with him, Ian refused.”

he wanted to, it’s obvious, but ian has his family and didnt want to abandon them again, i think part of him knew he would see mickey again because they always find eachother, he gave mickey all of his money and wanted mickey to have a good life

“Their relationship was simply never healthy.”

no it wasnt, but thats why the ship is great in its own way, the gay closet kid raised by a homophobic man is obviously going to have a lot of baggage , and ian who is bipolar and struggling with himself will also have a lot of baggage , but in the end they love eachother and that really shows in season five and season seven specifically

that is all lol ,,, this is long sorry

now, i am not a ian apologist , i love ian but hes a dumbass sometimes

actual valid reasons ian sucks

genuinely believes frank is worse than terry

yes frank was definitely abusive but terry is definitely worse ,,

mentally/physically/sexually abusive , the whole nine yards

terry hired a prostitute to r^pe his son , threatened to kill him and ian on multiple occasions , r^ped his daughter who ended up pregnant and is actively racist

frank on the other hand will make gay jokes but in the end doesnt give enough of a shit , he has attacked his children on multiple occasions but not to the brutality that terry has ( this isnt me excusing it )

sorry ian , terry is worse

never apologized

he never apologized for all the shit he put mickey and his family through, never apologized to mickey for cheating on him , never apologized for all the manic and depressive episodes mickey endured with him

never apologized for walking away when he couldn’t handle it, in hall of shame mickey actually acknowledges this saying ‘its youre whole MO’

debbies sexuality

he has constantly made statements saying debbie isnt gay and that bothers me because , why does it care ? as a gay man and as a gay man who soent time with a lot of lgbt youth wouldnt he support his sister even if shes just ‘experimenting’?

in the recent season he doesnt seem to care and doesn’t say anything but it still bothers me

mickey only getting like 80% of his heart

okay look , i get what ian means when he says this , everyones hes been with has made him who he is but fucking hell dude ,, shut up , thats your husband , thats the love of your life you shouldnt be saying shit like that , especially to him

and then this man had the audacity to say mickey probably feels the same about past flings when he knows that ian is the only one hes probably ever been with/serious about

obviously there is probably more but those are the main ones that come to mind

—

before anyone brings up the trans or bi thing im going to explain my thought process for him

like ive probably mentioned multiple times he grew up southside and obviously only ever grew up with lgb and not t ,, trevor did inform him a lot and ian became supre accepting of everyone,, sexual preference isnt transphobic but i do think he approached the matter badly

now the bi thing , legit all i think is that he doesnt hate bisexual people its just that the man he really liked slept with a woman and never expressed any heterosexual attraction so it probably just suprised him and pissed him off because caleb did cheat on ian

—

if you read this far HOLY SHIT THANKS LOL ,, im not adding things that i think are pro about ian this was just me breaking down that article and giving my two cents :)

feel free to message me and talk to me or send me articles like this about any other character/relationship and i will totally break that one down too lol

thanks for letting me rant

#mine #shameless #ian gallgher #gallavich #mickey milkovich #text post

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onekisstotakewithme · 3 years

Note

For the fic ask game: 6, 15 and 24?

6. What are some topics you will never write about?

Okay, so i am fully aware that this is going to be a controversial answer *braces self* but I'm not particularly interested in writing the end of Peg and BJ's marriage (especially if it involves BJ leaving Peg for Hawkeye), nor them being in a lavender marriage (Bi!BJ has my heart and soul, and their marriage is one of my favourite aspects of BJ), so my deepest apologies to anyone hoping for that from me, but it's not my cup of tea (please don't shun me)

15. Which fic that you’ve written relates to you and your personal life the most?

That... is a good question. don't we all lend parts of ourselves to add depth to characters we write? Just me? okay. Hmmm. Probably my triad college AU? Since I did in fact write it while I was in university and some of the things (classics student Peg, BJ with anxiety, etc) are part of who I am. The soft happy triad ending, unfortunately, isn't where I am 🤭

24. Which fic of yours do you wish people would ask about more? Why?

Technically I already answered this, but I have more than one answer!

I know that people in the MASH fandom (specifically MASHblr) adore Steve Newsom(e), and I would like to tell you all that i did in fact write a Steve story eons ago (isn't 2019 eons ago) called "crazy: a tragedy in three parts" so like go to it, my friends.

Thank you Neeks!! 💜

#ask #neekerbreeker #writing asks #my perfect ending is bj and peg both going to maine and the three of them being happy forever <33

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i-have-zero-chill · 3 years

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you dont have to answer this if you dont want to cause im not a shipper just an observer but i think its a little strange that seb has been posting tik toks and fanart all week (some of them even about steve, sam, john etc) but didnt mention sarahbucky once, and then all of the sudden disney has kari/malcolm doing interviews where they're being very wishy washy, and then seb DOES finally post about sarahbucky buthes reposting a post where bucky is looking at Sam and every comment is about them.

I wouldn’t say it’s strange honestly I would just say it’s the usual. I guarantee Marvel is aware of every single slash ship that exists in the MCU. They know what queer fans talk about and they know what we want. But at the end of the day it’s a business and they care more about the homophobic audience’s money, so they’re obviously gonna hype up the m/f ships more. I think that article where Kari said the tiger photos weren’t intended to be a bi Bucky hint was some small form of damage control. As long as they keep saying that they weren’t intending for something to be queer, the straight audiences can keep thinking that and they will keep giving Marvel their money. And that’s honestly not really Malcolm or Kari’s fault, despite my complaining about certain things they’ve said.

We have to take into consideration that the show runners only have so much control over the thing they are creating. They can purposely queer-code stuff but they can’t say that they did. Which is kind of the whole point. As far as the cast and crew goes, I think we’ll never truly know any of their real thoughts on romantic sambucky. I don’t know anything about how contracts work but with a franchise like this where everything is very calculated, I’m sure there are some things they just aren’t allowed to say.

I don’t really think Seb posted the sarabucky thing because someone told him too, I think he just likes to do that stuff for the fans and it’s a cute ship. But I do think he would “get in trouble,” so to speak, if he posted specifically romantic sambucky stuff. And I don’t think that’s me being a conspiracy theorist. He’s posted plenty of fanart and tiktoks about the show so there’s no way he hasn’t seen all the gay shit, yet he never posts any of it (as far as I know, and I check his story frequently). And as much as we can never really know famous people, I don’t think he or Anthony are like secretly homophobes who hate sambucky shippers so... yeah if you ask me it’s just Marvel being it’s regular homophobic self. Nothing new at all.

#sambucky #tfatws #text post #anon #also like seb is more free to support stucky since Steve’s story is over #he’s not coming back and even if he does he’s fucking elderly now so #it no longer matters

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colorfulbaobab · 3 years

Text

in which i realise i have sex/relationship history headcanons about most of the avengers (mostly mcu-compliant, or rather, doesn’t omit events)

nat: i’ve read an ace!natasha headcanon somewhere and i’m a changed gal. can she get it? YES. does she want to? naah. she knows sexual attraction and can weaponize it to perfection but it’s more of a detached observation kinda thing. i think she is not aromantic but maybe demi? reading her relationship to clint or steve or yelena romantically doesn’t bother me. ok i am omitting one thing natbruce can die

sam: he is the normal one™ out of the bunch, so first relationship/had sex in high school. then there is riley. after that he is kinda hesistant about commitment and mostly stuck to one night stands but still makes breakfast the morning after if his partner wants to stick around. bi king. i love you sam <3 i think bucky does too

bucky: i can see him sex-positive in the 40s with his ladies. probably scandalized the hell out of his mom and steve. so what if he likes men too and has a big crush on steve?? it’s not like he’s ever gonna act on it. anyways, is pretty excited that homophobia’s less of an issue in the present. but he has a ton of issues™ and mourning steve and is kinda self-concious about his metal arm, so i love what they did in tfatws. him checking out online dating but then bailing out of a date is exactly how i picture him mentally.

steve: hear me out, this man was totally a virgin before he decided to fuck with timelines. pre-serum he wanted to fall in love first. then he was mourning peggy and was busy saving the world. yes, nat was his first kiss after the 40s. post-aou he buried himself in new avengers work. i don’t think anything happened with sharon beyond that one infamous kiss. unfortunately straight. he’s aware of bucky’s gigantic crush on him and is lowkey homophobic about it.

clint: mcu didn’t give me human disaster clint but they can pry the wild 20s clint headcanon from my cold dead hands. i see clint in a bunch of legal/bordeline legal/illegal jobs when he was young, livin fast and all that jazz. so it’s kind of a miracle he got to his 30s STD-free. def bi, i don’t believe anyone using a bow is straight. he is happily married for a while now.

wanda: pre-avengers she def had sex, but i don’t see her in a relationship. too obsessed with revenge. this makes vision her first boyfriend which is too cute and entirely tragic.

vision: can a vibranium synthezoid have sex? dunno. they had a pretty good thing goin on with wanda tho hahaha im not ok thank you for asking :’)

pietro: insert speedster innuendo of your choice. sorry didn’t think much about him tbh

tony: everything’s in the tabloids go read if you want

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meloingly · 3 years

Text

Have Me, Have You, Have Us

@carlosreyesweek Day 3: “Well, that just happened” + Friendship.

Summary: Five times Carlos reveals something about himself that no one else knows, and it helps him get closer to the 126 crew, and one time the 126 knows something that Carlos doesn't.

This is a multi-chaptered fic. I've tried to write them all in time to be published together, but by God, they weren't having it. I still haven't decided how I'll update, but I'm thinking bi-weekly. Tags will be updated accordingly.

Tags: Carlos Reyes, TK Strand, Paul Strickland, Marjan Marwani, Mateo Chavez, Judd Ryder, Owen Strand, Michelle Blake, Original Female Character, Original Male Character, Developing Friendship.

Warnings: Mentions of Past Homophobia.

Beta: The owner of my soul @lire-casander

Read on AO3

---

Chapter 1: Paul: Live This Life, It's All We Have

Carlos walks into the honky-tonk a mere forty-five minutes after his shift ended. He was on the way home when TK called him and asked if he would detour. He likes the man, so it didn't need much pondering over.

He sees TK standing in front of one of the multiple dartboards hung on the wall, alongside Michelle, Captain Strand, Judd, Marjan and Mateo. They seem to be engrossed in a contest, if the annoyance on Marjan's face, the smugness in Judd's and the paper and pen in Mateo's hand are anything to go by.

He hesitates for a moment, the idea of walking into the middle of the group to greet them sends a slight shiver down his back and he quickly decides he'll wait for them to finish. He spots Paul sitting at the self-claimed "126 table." He moves towards the bar, ordering mineral water, before he grabs his drink and walks towards the man. Recognising TK's jacket slung over the chair right next to Paul, he plops on the next stool over.

Paul turns around, a hint of surprise in his eyes, until the realisation of who this hits him, and it's replaced with a smile.

"Hey, man."

"Hey," Carlos greets him back, "how you doing?"

Paul shrugs, and even though it's not much, Carlos understands the meaning behind it all the same. They fall into a comfortable silence, Carlos' eyes roaming the open area ahead of them. Three girls stand in the corner, dancing quietly amongst each other, two elderly men occupy a booth, Carlos gets the vibe that they're trading life-altering experiences. More "dudebros" hang around the snooker tables and dartboards. Carlos is about to focus back on TK, when he notices a singular woman sitting in a booth alone, a drink in her hand, a small, shy smile on her lips and eyes trained somewhere on their table.

Carlos frowns. He turns around, about to ask for some super-human Paul deduction powers when he realises that Paul is staring right back at her. A shy smile on his face too.

Carlos blinks. He looks back at the woman and sees that her eyes are now on her table, and then he turns to Paul, and his eyes are roaming the ceiling of the bar. He turns back to the woman, and now she's looking at Paul again. And Paul has his eyes locked on her.

Carlos curls into himself slightly, trying to get out of their visual field. He's sitting somewhat between them, and he'd like to not be. He concentrates on his drink, and everything else in the bar that isn't Paul and his potential lady friend.

A few minutes later, he can't help but look towards her again. She's got her phone out now, scrolling up and down on the screen. Turning to Paul, he finds he's looking at his drink as well.

Carlos goes baffled. The woman is clearly interested in Paul, and while he might not be a super-detective like the other man, he can tell that the feeling is reciprocated. And yet, they're both just sitting here, alternating between eye flirting and avoidance. His curiosity gets the best of him, and he slides into the chair in between them.

"So, you're just not going to talk to her?"

Paul gawks at him, eyes widening in clear shock before he schools his reaction into some form of indifference.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Man," Carlos starts, rolling his eyes at the man, "I may not have the Gods of perception poised on my shoulders, but I'm not that blind!"

Paul narrows his eyes in response. Carlos is pretty sure he's going for accusation, but he's been trained to pick up on anything underneath, and in this case, it's a moment of contemplation. Whatever it is though, Paul seems to have made up his mind on it rather quickly. He sighs and looks down at his drink again.

"It's hard, man. Last thing I need is another rejection."

Carlos can't help the wave of sympathy that goes through him. The again that Paul’s not saying takes him back to the night they went clubbing. TK hadn't said much about why, just that a friend needed a night to have fun and forget about things.

"Ahh. Yeah. That's the queer life."

Paul snorts in reply, "Yeah, not all of us can find the one gay firefighter transfer and charm the pants off him."

Carlos lets out some mix of a loud laugh and a snort.

"Hey! I'm lucky right now, but that doesn't mean growing up didn't suck."

He can tell he's said too much by the way Paul goes quiet, and the atmosphere around them changes. With both understanding and pain. They look at each other, sharing a sympathetic smile, trying to convey a silent "yeah? You too?"

"Parents took it hard?" Paul asks.

Carlos lets out a genuine smile at that. If there's one thing he was blessed with the moment he was born, it was his family.

"The family was amazing. It's everyone else that wasn't."

Paul doesn't ask after that, not verbally at least. Carlos can see the questions in his eyes. He takes a calming breath. No one knows the story that's swarming around his mind right now. Michelle might have collected and connected bits and pieces through the years, but other than that, no one in Austin knows about his childhood.

But here he is. He's okay. And he has a friend who is in a place he was in years ago. Fighting with acceptance and fear of rejection. He takes another breath.

"I came out to my dad and sister when I was 12. Everything went well. They were supportive, pledged their love, all of that," he starts. "A few weeks later though, I started finding notes in my locker."

Paul lets out a groan, undeniably aware of what kind of notes Carlos is talking about.

"A few weeks after the notes started, I got called into the principal’s office and told that my dad would be informed and they would help us "change my homosexual ways", he added, air quotations included.

It takes him back to a decade and a half ago. When a young, short and lanky Carlos was in science class, the notes hidden in the depth of his backpack. When the school speakers boomed with the principal's voice saying "Carlos Reyes, please report to the Principal's office. Carlos Reyes, please report to the Principal's office." He remembers thinking, hoping, that it was about the notes, that the principal will ask who is sending him the vile words, and will make them stop.

He remembers standing up to leave, and the teacher, Mr. Roger, telling to pack his bag as well. He remembers hearing a strange tone, but not quite understanding it. He knows now it was poison, venom, hate. He remembers doing it anyway. He remembers the walk down the hallway, bag on his shoulders, and the teachers glaring at him through the glass slits in the doors.

He remembers getting to the office. The secretary, Ms. Harding, holding his hand, telling him "The Lord will cure you." He remembers not knowing what they meant. Not knowing what they were talking about. He doesn't get the chance to ask. He remembers being led to the Principal's room, the big office much more intimidating to his twelve-year-old eyes than it should have been. He remembers the nameplate; a large golden script of "Mr. Steve Atwood" and a smaller "Principal of Lubbock Junior High School" on a wooden piece. He remembers thinking it wasn't normal wood, it was red, and he didn't know wood could be red.

He remembers Mr. Atwood speaking, telling him that life is ruled by the Bible and God and Jesus. That he's a child who can still change. That this isn't the way to continue living. That his dad will be informed. That he will get help. That there are camps. That he will stop being this way.

"Were you out at school?" Paul asks, the horror evident in his tone.

It's the same horror Carlos remembers feeling when they were leaving church a few weeks before the incident, his sister by his side and their dad a few steps up ahead, talking to a neighbour. His sister had pointed towards a rainbow flag hung on the house across the street from the church. "We should get you one and hang it at home, that way the other boys like you will know where to find you," she had giggled. He had giggled right along with her, until he heard a gasp coming from behind him, and turned to find Mrs. Atwood behind him, eyes wide as he stared down at him in what he now knows was disgust. He remembers the fear that ran through him. But then his sister ran ahead. And he had followed her.

"Not really, but it doesn't make a difference," he explains. "It's not like they would have been supportive if I sat them down and told them."

Paul shakes his head, and then asks, "And then what happened?"

"My dad came in somewhere through the dialogue, I remember Mr. Atwood standing up, trying to greet him, but he was mad. Angry in a way I've never seen before. He told me to go outside and wait for him."

Carlos pauses, the memory assaulting his senses. "I heard him screaming at the principal, saying that it wasn't Mr. Atwood's place to talk to me, that I was a child, that it was none of his business. That I wouldn’t be coming back to that school again."

He remembers the entire interaction like it was mere days ago. His dad walking out of the office, squatting down to Carlos' level and asking him if he had all his things. Carlos had answered a weak "yes", and his dad was already holding his hand, pulling him out of the school and into the car.

"He was quiet throughout the car ride. We turned into our street, but he just kept going, saying he forgot to get something from the store. He started to joke around with me then, telling me he was the World's Strongest Man and he could carry me, and the car and everything and anything. I played right along, and somehow, I found myself agreeing that if he could carry me then he was as strong as he said. We circled around the block, didn't even go to any stores, and parked in front of our porch. He pulled me through his door, hid my head in his neck and ran me home."

Carlos pauses. He can see Paul frowning over the story losing sense. Just like he had thought for so long. It never made sense to him why his dad carried him. Why that day? Why that fast? Until…

"I later found out that someone had written the wonderful “f” slur on our garage door, and he didn't want me to see that."

Paul smiles and nods. Carlos knows there is nothing else he could do. There are no words or actions to express what he felt when he found that out. His dad, the man that had spent his everything raising him, seeing something he knew would hurt his child, and doing everything in his power to protect him. If he turns out to be half the father his dad was, he would consider himself a good father.

"We started packing almost immediately, and we were out of that town in a week. He wouldn't let me or my sister leave the house, not even to play in the yard, throughout the week. Dad said he got a transfer, but he was home for a month, so I have a feeling that wasn't exactly true."

"He just packed y'all up and brought you here?" Paul asks.

"Yes. That's exactly what he did. He wanted us to live freely. To love freely. And he knew we wouldn't be able to do that in Lubbock. So he moved us out."

"To Austin?"

"Yeah, I mean, it was miles better than Lubbock, so, no complaints." Paul hums, but Carlos isn't done, "And plus, I met you, my new bestest friend in Austin!"

Paul laughs at that, and Carlos can't help but join him at Paul's mumbled "Yeah, right!"

The laughter dies down, and the easy silence returns. Carlos lifts the drink to his lips, eyes searching for TK. He sees him practically hanging off Mateo, arms around his shoulders. Marjan butts in between, shaking her hands towards the board while TK makes some sort of hand gesture. They're trying to show Mateo how to throw a dart, he realises. Slightly to their side, Michelle, Captain Strand and Judd hang around, beers in hands, looking pleased. His vision roams the bar again, falling on the woman, and it dawns on him that he never got to tell Paul what started the whole story in the first place.

The realisation sends him into a frenzy. He turns to Paul, only to, of course, find him looking at the woman. He pokes Paul's arm, and his eyes break off her to focus back on Carlos.

"I didn't tell you my coming out story because I had nothing better to do, you know," Carlos starts. "I have more story."

Paul shakes his head, a smile on his face, before making a "go ahead" gesture with his hands.

"When we moved here, my dad sat me down, and told me that he had my back, and that I should live free. Be the person that I am, who happens to be gay. And I thought that would be it, you know, I'd live now. My family was supportive. I was in an open city. I had it all good."

"But?" Paul interrupts.

"But. It wasn't that easy. That interaction with the principal and the looks of the teachers hit me harder the more I grew up, the more I started to understand what they meant. And I found myself a seventeen-year-old gay guy that was out in every way but wasn’t really out. I wouldn't ask anyone out. I wouldn't flirt. I wouldn't even let myself look at guys. All because I was afraid of that judgement and rejection and hate."

Paul huffs a breath, eyes moving to stare at the table. Carlos doesn't speak either. He knows that's what this is all about. The fear of not being accepted. Of not being taken in and liked because of something as trivial as their identity. He knows Paul is contemplating the situation. The win-loss ratio. He knows he did, many times before. He still does.

"How did you get over it?"

Carlos is so lost in his own thoughts and emotions, he almost misses the mumbled question. He takes a breath, letting it out almost instantly in a sigh.

"My dad told me that I had spent too much time in fear. If I'm out, I might as well be out, live life, love life, and stop taking every rejection like it's the end of the world."

Paul nods, looking away at the woman across the bar, before Carlos continues, "When I still complained though, he then said "stop letting homophobic dickhead assholes control your life, if you like dick then you like dick, if the dick you like is a judgemental dick then find a better dick"."

Paul whips his head up to stare at Carlos, realises he is being serious, and proceeds to break out in a booming laugh. Carlos feigns offence for a moment, withdrawing his hand and holding it to his chest.

"You dare make fun of my father's sage advise?!"

Paul is still laughing, letting out broken no's and never's. Carlos drops the act, hands landing on the table and laughing with Paul, until it dies down.

"How did your nerdy self come from such wisdom?" Paul asks, after they take a moment to catch their breath.

"Hey! I took after his wisdom and handsomeness, I'll have you know!"

Paul snorts as he looks at the woman again, and Carlos turns his head just in time to see her lift her head up, make eye contact with Paul, and smile. He hears Paul inhale, and then, the scratch of a stool on wooden flooring.

He looks back at Paul, and finds that he's on his feet, fixing his pants. A grin takes over his face, and Paul levels him with a glare. It does nothing to diminish the excitement he feels when Paul pats his shoulder as he moves to the woman's table. The happy smile that takes over her face increases his own. And when she gestures at the empty seat across her - after a moment of talking - and Paul slides in, he realises that his heart beats with joy for him.

He's brought out to focus when arms circle his torso, and the very familiar lips of one TK Strand press a kiss on his cheek.

"Hi."

"Hey."

"What's Paul doing?" TK says, gesturing with his chin towards the booth they're in.

"Going after the proverbial dick he likes."

#carlosreyesweek2021 #Day 3: Friendship #Day 3: Well that just happened #Friendship #Carlos Reyes #TK Strand #Paul Strickland #Marjan Marwani #Mateo Chavez #Judd Ryder #Owen Strand #Grace Ryder #Michelle Blake

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