#SEMI SELF AWARE he’s just not like ‘what are bi people’ but also i have friends who didn’t know it was an option
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Cherry Magic / 30-sai made Doutei dato Mahoutsukai ni nareru rashii Episode 1
Overall Score so far: 8/10
Mainly because Kiyoshi Adachi knows he is in a BL, and is very aware of what might happen to him, and the short hand title is fucking hilarious. Cherry Magic. Cherri Maho. Man I love Japanese.
Also GOOD CROWS ABOVE THIS ANIME IS GENRE-SAVVY. It knows exactly what it's doing, and feels like it's going to deliver what it promises. A wholesome lovey dovey little story.
The whole 1st episode almost feels self contained in a way that will definitely let you know if this show is for you or not. Capybara pointed out that this seems to be a common recent trend with anime for their first episodes. We saw it in Dr. Elise, Frieren, and Dungeon Meshi kind of felt that way too.
My first impression that might not make sense to some people is that this is a toned down Doppo and Hifumi from Matenrou/Hypnosis Mic.
Also, WE'VE GOT TWO POWERHOUSE VOICE ACTORS HERE!!
Adachi is being voiced by the lovely deadpan of Kobayashi, Chiaki - His other roles I know being Langa from SK∞, Gabimaru!! (my beloved) from Jigokuraku/Hell's Paradise, and Mash!! from MASHLE, also this season! I haven't seen Vinland Saga yet, but other might know him as Askeladd! Kobayashi-san has a very particular voice that doesn't fluctuate much, but he knows when to show emotion that gives a good impact. Quote from Capybara - "They picked this guy for his dead pan, but can he emote? Oh, he's Langa from sk8, oh yeah, he can emote."
Kurosawa is voiced by Suzuki, Ryouta a super memorable voice! - Ryusui from Dr. Stone, Yuu ishikami from Kaguya Sama, BISCO!!! FROM SABIKU BISCO!!! That is some RANGE right there! Loud and Prideful, Quiet and Dark, and then a Screamy Boy. This is a younger VA who has had some great starting roles, and has already become a memorable and impactful voice, making this a very good match up!
Anyways, nerding out about voice actors aside, Episode 1 spoilers below!
At first it seems like we're going to get the standard tropes that come with the BL(Boys Love)/Yaoi Genre...
Adachi is ON HIS GUARD and KNOWS THE TROPES.
But the show immediately spins those very same tropes on their head! It's great!! It's been so long since I watched a BL, and despite knowing that the genre in manga form has mostly moved away from a lot of the dub-con tropes (unless you're looking for it of course), it's lovely to see something that actually feels like a proper and semi-realistic romance.
Kurosawa seems like a super sweet dude who's ALSO aware this is a BL, but also that gay guys don't just exist everywhere and that the chance of his crush returning his affection is low.
But. There is no way Adachi is straight. He's absolutely either bi, and/or gay + somewhere on the ace-spec (demi?) depending on how things play out from here.
I bet Adachi stumbled into reading a BL manga (or two or three or) at some point in his younger years, and it had more of an impact on his psyche than he remembers, lmao.
His fascination with knowing Kurosawa has a crush on him is adorable, and he's absolute confusion at stumbling across the other man's fantasies is hilarious.
The tension between them is beautiful when Adachi is pretending to sleep, and we all KNOW Kurosawa is thinking of his sleeping face and then playing it off as just grabbing his phone. I repeat, there is NO WAY Adachi is straight, lmao.
In response to this rhetorical question, No and Yes. If Adachi was the woman, saying yes would imply that she was aware she was being asked to have sex and giving consent (at least by Japanese standards I ASSUME? I've never been in this situation). And if Kurosawa was the woman, that is one very forward and direct lady who is absolutely Down To Fuck (Again, by Japanese standards afaik).
God, then they go out for yakiniku/Korean bbq the next day, and he finds himself enjoying the other man's company and wishing they could be friends, only to brush up again him and remember this man is in love with him. Adachi, you precious child, this is why you're so lovable. The immediate regret for taking the other man's feelings so lightly and not knowing what to do as he runs away is heart wrenching and OF COURSE THE EPISODE ENDS THERE.
It's a running theme that Adachi is worried about other's opinions and doesn't know how to rely on other, which tends to be a negative, but in this case, he's so conscientious of hurting Kurosawa by taking his feelings lightly. Even though he ends up hurting him anyways, I see this as a favorable take on the typical people-pleaser type character.
I'm not really looking to the implied trope of "Best Friend who also has a crush and claims to know him best" in the next episode, but since everything else has been subverted, I'm hoping that will get subverted too? Especially knowing that Best Friend-kun is in the secondary pairing from the PVs.
I WANT TO BINGE THIS. THIS IS GOING TO BE SO DAMN CUTE.
The HypMic Reference:
Adachi is a Toned Down Doppo, who is an over worked businessman at a black company who might as well be Canadian for how often he says sorry, but goes into Berserker mode and absolutely destroys his opponents when pushed too far or his partners are hurt, and is Hifumi's emotion support human.
Kurosawa is a super Toned Down Hifumi, who is the #1 host at a club in Shinjuku and has a split personality of the perfect princely boyfriend, and a charai/flashy and "it'll be fine lol" personality, who is basically a housewife for Doppo and is also Doppo's emotional support human.
There aren't THAT many connection points between the two, but still, I like the comparison, aha.
Anyways, My Hopes For This Anime, having NOT read the manga and not wanting spoilers, are that these two get together by half way through the season and then we get the "newly dating" stages of their relationship, and various mishaps that only serve to strengthen their relationship. They seem like a very good couple and it would be a waste for them to not get together.
If they don't get together until episode 12, I will be so blue balled that I will have to drop it if only to get the circulation in my brain back.
Hype for more!
ep2 ep3 ep4 ep5 ep6 <- these will eventually become links
#cherry magic#30 sai made doutei dato mahoutsukai ni nareru rashii#チェリまほ#30歳まで童貞だと魔法使いになれるらしい#anime winter 2024#doppo kannonzaka#hifumi izanami#doppo x hifumi#adachi kiyoshi#kurosawa yuichi
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Gender Thoughts Pt 1 and 2
The first time I put a binder on, a little under a week ago, I felt euphoric. Ever since I hit puberty very early on, I felt uncomfortable with my breasts. They never felt right on me, and even though I’ve come to love them sometimes, they still don’t always feel like they match up. I hated how people always looked at them, pointed out how much they showed in low cut shirts when I never even noticed they were--or even wanted them to. They were just there. I liked the way low cut shirts feel and look on me, I just can’t help these giant sacks of flesh that sit on my chest.
Except...now I can! I ran my hands over my smooth chest, feeling bright. I looked into the mirror, and felt something warm wash over me. I put on my new masculine clothes, letting my partner clip on my new suspenders. I realized that I was shaking as I looked at myself again… I looked like a boy. I felt like a boy. Like a man. And I liked it. I wanted it. Admitting that to myself was like coming home.
I remember being in sixth grade, walking around the track for my civil air patrol class. I had been slotted in with the rest of the girls, the boys walking ahead of us. I remember feeling uncomfortable being shoved in with only girls, and looking at the gaggle of boys ahead. The exact thought that whispered in my brain was “I wish I was a boy. I want to be like them, with them.” I never forgot that moment, and how strange it made me feel. How it was easier to shake that thought away, and dismiss those feelings. Except they never really left, did they?
I remember sitting on my bed, crying with my best friend kneeling in front of me. I remember telling her how I didn’t like feeling like a woman all the time. That I wished I could be a black shadow, monstrous, androdynous. Specifically like Venom. She took my hand, did my makeup all in black and helped me pick out the perfect black outfit to achieve that dark, gothic look. I was so incredibly happy and validated. But I still felt like something was missing.
I remember going into an Adam and Eve for laugh, not expecting much since I am an asexual with a low libido. I remember seeing packers and feeling my chest tighten. I never liked my genitalia--I had wished for a cloaca or something akin to that, but since that was biologically impossible for a human… I sometimes wished I had the opposite of a vagina. I frequently imagined what it would be like to have a penis. I frequently lamented the fact that I didn’t have one. I took the box up to the counter to ask some questions, my dress swishing as I went. The cashier told me it was for trans people only, and a girl like me couldn’t have it. She didn’t know what asexuality was, and had tried polyamory once but decided it was bad when her girlfriend kissed her boyfriend. I was upset, disheartened, and left the store empty handed feeling frustrated and lost.
I remember finally cutting the long, curly locks that had frustrated and imprisoned me for so long. Seeing all of my hair fall to the floor, staring into the mirror as the barber buzzed the back of my head… It made me want to cry tears of joy. It was the first time in my entire life that I had looked at my hair and was happy. The first time I could look in the mirror and feel like myself. Then I remember wanting to go shorter, and my barber encouraging me to keep it a little longer so I didn’t look manly, so I could still be soft and feminine. The way my stomach dropped and the sick feeling in my chest only increased when he began to make fun of the gay men who came down the street near his favorite restaurant. I never saw that barber again. I instead found a nice local place down the road from my apartment, where the kind lady cut it all off without question, other than “Why?” and accepted my warm “It makes me happy. It makes me feel beautiful.”
But wearing that binder for the first time? It was as if a beam of light had funneled its way directly into my heart. I felt like a handsome man, with just a little bit of striking man boob, and it felt so right. My partner called me a dashing boy and my heart began to race. I still feel his hand tracing my jawline as he called me handsome, and the butterflies it sent up through my belly, even after more than eleven years.
I love my partner--he identifies as agender and primarily masculine, and has been on the lookout for a good pair of size thirteen shoes to wear with a dress. They also wear joggers and flip flops and graphic tees and can’t seem to stop talking about the ocean and outer space. They’re probably one of my biggest inspirations for finding myself, and being authentically me.
I’m not super sure who or what I am right now. I’m still figuring that out, but I’m pretty sure I’m somewhere between agender and genderfluid. I feel like me more than anything else, but all pronouns make me feel good. I feel like all of them and none of them at once, but I swing between wanting to be feminine and masculine pretty strongly, though I enjoy being masculine most of all--even when I’m wearing dresses and pink. I feel like a beautiful person in a dress or a button down, no matter what gender I feel like today or tomorrow.
I am me. And I am one dashing boy, and one beautiful girl.
4 July 2021
XXX
Since first writing this little essay, I’ve been doing a lot more examination of my gender. I have come to the conclusion that I am transmasc and nonbinary, and am shaky on the title of genderfluid. I am feeling less and less like a woman--if anything, occasionally adjacent to a woman rather than actually being one. I love feeling like and presenting as a man. I have my first appointment with a gender services doctor at my local community clinic for consultation on starting hrt testosterone. I am planning to start with low dose first, and see how I feel.
I am still unsure of my exact identity, but I have found great euphoria with being and presenting as a man. I love being a man and everything that entails. I have loved myself like never before. Being with my partner is amazing, and he has been endlessly supportive--even recounting little things they had noticed throughout the years. One of the funniest being that I only ever referred to my body parts--my belly, hands, hair, genitalia--with masculine pronouns. I always seemed to see my body as male even if I had a certain sort of dissonance from it.
Coming out has been difficult. I have had both positive and negative experiences from it. I have been told going on testosterone would be self harm, and that I can’t be something I’m not. I’ve had coworkers I trusted out me without my permission. But I have also had positive affirmation, polite questions, and discussions. I am terrified to tell my mother and her boyfriend--I have no idea how they will react and am terrified that I will be disrespected and disowned.
But I am prepared to do whatever it takes to be my happiest and most authentic self.
I have been binding a lot more often, wearing sports bras for long shifts at work, and occasionally going without either when I feel like letting my man boobs hang free. I’ve had the delightful experience of going to a men’s big and tall store and finally wearing pants. I grew up as a fat girl and felt as if I had to perform high femininity to be taken seriously and be treated well--and had been told by someone I trusted that I was too fat to wear pants, which I heavily internalized. So I had completely cast them away in favor of dresses and skirts, bows and gaudy jewelry. Realizing that I could wear pants was...totally wild. That I could be comfortable and look good in pants and shorts, and that it didn’t matter what people did or thought of me was life changing. Maybe I’ll feel like being feminine again someday, but right now this masculinity and masculine clothing, with perhaps the added spice of funky earrings, feels like home.
I also grew up autistic and with PCOS, both which I think have affected my gender identity. Being autistic, I truly struggled to connect to others socially, and especially to understand societal norms. Being a proper woman felt like I was making up for everything else I was lacking--I may have been awkward, semi-verbal and weird with no friends, but at least I was cute and girlish. I never connected to womanhood though, and always felt out of place no matter how hard I tried. With PCOS, I had heightened testosterone, which meant wider breasts and shoulders, a lack of periods, and excessive body hair. I recall the endocrinologist asking high school age me if I had excessive body hair around my stomach, breasts, etc. and my mother jumping to say no I didn’t...even though I did. I remember suddenly feeling very self aware and ashamed of something completely natural, and even something I started to enjoy. I started shaving my entire body then.
I even remember being in middle school, and thinking nothing of my hairy legs. In fact, I loved my body hair and how it felt. A rude girl began making fun of me though, tutting her tongue as she cooed, “Aw, does your mommy not let you shave?” Among other things, all throughout many years of severe bullying and abuse. I remember feeling ashamed, but not knowing why, and immediately shaving my legs, covering them in nicks from my shaky and unsteady hands, that same night.
So many things set me back in my gender expression. So many things contributed to me willful ignorance and denial. I remember wanting to be butch, and everyone in my life laughing at me and saying I was too soft for that. That sweet, sharp ache in my chest. I remember going to a salad bar with my mother, wearing a button up and telling her I wanted to wear some more boyish clothes around that same time--I had already told her that I was bi sometime earlier. I remember her lip curling, looking uncomfortable, and telling me that I better not become one of those boy girls. My late father was very vocal in denouncing homosexuality and specifically men loving men--something which always sat horribly wrong with me on a deeper level.
I think I might ending up being a trans man. I am still unsure and figuring myself out, but I struggle greatly with the autistic need for sameness vs. the trans need for change. My sapphic love of women has always been very important to me, and fully becoming a man rather than genderfluid is scary for that very reason. I am still navigating my identity and what it means to me and my reality--but no matter what, being a man, being masculine is integral to who I am.
I was called a “sir” at a job interview for the first time the other day, and nearly began to bawl from sheer joy. The gender euphoria from that and so many moments is worth so much more to me than the years of suffering and ignorance and my ongoing struggles with dysphoria. I finally got a packer and have had help from my partner in learning to position it properly--I am thinking of cutting my hair even shorter. I have almost perfected a pretty basic tie tying skill. Okay, not really, but I’m getting there. I feel deep inside that even though my father loved me, he would not like who and what I am. Still, I wear the last watch he ever wore, and hope to be a good man like him--and to learn from the toxic parts of him to be an even better man.
I am very excited to start hrt. I am terrified of hair loss and vaginal atrophy, but I look forward to so much more. I cannot wait for bottom growth and body hair, for the voice drop that will hopefully get me misgendered less. I have always felt disconnected from my voice and look forward to getting to know it better as it changes with me. I look forward to meeting with new facial hair. Working out and growing muscle. I just look forward to my second puberty and becoming more like myself. I look forward to navigating and exploring my gender even further, both with loved ones, support groups, and myself.
More than anything, I am just happy to be me.
25 August 2021
#transmasc#ftm#ftx#gender#genderqueer#transgender#trans#lgbt#lgbtq#trans man#nonbinary#genderfluid#poets of tumblr#spilled thoughts#gender expression#low dose t#hrt
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* 𝐠𝐞𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐚𝐲, 𝐜𝐢𝐬-𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞 + 𝐡𝐞 / 𝐡𝐢𝐦 | you know 𝐤𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐲 “𝐬𝐢𝐝” 𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐮, right? they’re 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲-𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐨𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 by 𝐨𝐡𝐢𝐨 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐫𝐬 like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole 𝐤𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐧𝐭’𝐬 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐞𝐤 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐭𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐬, 𝟐𝟎𝟎𝟎𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬, 𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐨 thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is 𝐣𝐚𝐧𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝟏𝟔𝐭𝐡, so they’re a 𝐜𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐧, which is unsurprising, all things considered.
NAME: kassidy averescu
NICKNAME(S): sid. strictly sid
D.O.B: january 16th, 1996
AGE: 25
BIRTH PLACE: irving, north carolina
CURRENTLY RESIDING: irving, north carolina
SEXUALITY: bi-curious, but we don’t talk about it
OCCUPATION: entitled twat / pesky lil crook
tw: mentions of gangs, crime, drugs, weapons, attempted murder but not really.
BACKSTORY:
born and raised in irving, has lived in the same freakin’ mansion in aquila drive pretty much his whole life. serving you the full rich boy fantasy, except it’s all rotten. illegal as shit. his mother, who’s been pretty much an outlaw since she was in her early twenties, literally runs like a tiny little crime organization where she recruits family members and people she finds trustworthy enough to pull off heists and just... earn all that $$$ in ways that could get you seriously fucked if anyone ever found out. she’s quite powerful and.. frankly quite scary for a woman in her late fifties. truly knows how to get shit done. i mean.. she trained her kids to be semi successful young criminals, so.. that’s pretty badass of her.
to be fair, though, he still had a childhood. he wasn’t, like, laundering money at the age of six. growing up, he obviously wasn’t exposed to a lot of illegal stuff. would get whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted and didn’t even question it. thought for the longest time that his mother really was this successful business lady or whatever, and all the shady people in their living room past 10pm were just other company owners.
never met his dad. guy’s been out of the picture since before his mother even knew she was pregnant. has few half-siblings, though none of them probably has the same father as their mom was never one for commitment. sid fully leaves the half part out when talking about them, because.. well, they all pretty much grew up together, so that makes them 100% siblings.
he’s the only boyo in the family and uhh... sometimes it’s as if he believes he deserves special treatment because of it??? idk.
did well enough in high school, got accepted to college in charlotte on a swimming scholarship even though the fam had more than enough money to pay for the studies. but, he was a good swimmer and.. it was recognized. he used to compete a little and even won a couple of times, but.. he still wanted more. started getting greedy. grew up getting everything handed to him, was the best on the high school swimming team so when he went off to college and met another guy who was maybe even slightly better?? oh, hello, he was not gonna take it. i think that was like the first time he felt properly jealous. threatened to shit. at that point in his life, he was aware of the stuff his mother had been pulling, having been involved a couple of times before. so, he thought he could just take the matter into his own hands and once before a competition, he crushed up a bunch of sleeping pills and had someone slip them into the dude’s gatorade. guy literally passed out in the water and almost drowned. to nobody’s surprise, the competition was put on hold and sid literally had the audacity to be like ??? what !! but he passed out, so .. how does that not mean i win???
anyways, the accomplice felt so horrible about this, they told on him and sid was obviously kicked out of uni. in fact, the whole situation was serious enough for people to want to take it even further (aka to court) but that’s where sid’s mom stepped in and did some of her ~ magic ~ to get her shit child, as well as the overall family name, out of trouble. she was so, so disappointed, though. like, wow, she went in on him, and he cried like a little bitch on the ride home. hasn’t spoken of this incident since, but if you bring it up, he’ll stick to the story the guy just passed out. not his fault. don’t hold it against him. <3
has grown a lil since the incident. learned to be more careful when it comes to sabotage. now, he’ll smile to the opponents face, lose with grace, and afterwards get his revenge if he’s feeling petty enough. 80% of the time, he is.
currently lives with the fam and is very involved in the whole.. heisting. gets a massive kick out of it, tbh.
PERSONALITY:
um, first of all, he’s absolutely unhinged. quite unpredictable. like, he’s not necessarily always ready to stab someone, but there are moments where he just does something and you’re like ??? oh my fucking god, please stop. literally, whenever he’d get angry abt something he’d go a little off the rails and maybe shoot the radio or the tv and his mom wld jst be like ... it’s okay, baby. go at it. i’ll let you shoot one object a week. whatever makes you feel better <3 so yea, in a way she... encouraged a lot of this behavior?? idk, i don’t wanna point fingers, but if she had let him.. not be a brat for a second, he wld maybe be a different person today. rip.
restless. so fucking restless. and you know what does not help?! all the coke he does! and molly! and other shit that doesn’t do any good when your mind is already going hundred miles per minute. yum, yum.
absolutely thrillseeker. he just wants to feel stuff. adrenaline rush 24/7. can somewhat contain himself enough not to mess up when on a job, but in his free time?? he’ll literally get someone to ram his head into a wall and freakin’ laugh abt it. it’s a mess. a riot.
omg ... has the nasty tendency of handling weapons like they’re toys. will spontaneously do shit like a point a gun at you or put it in his mouth and be like ... yo yo yo. thinks it’s funny? i honestly don’t know what’s going thru his mind.
because his thoughts move at the speed of light, he also tends to speak super fast when he’s all riled up abt something. also knows a bit of asl n ... its actually quite scary how fast he can sign along.
doesn’t hold back. if he feels strongly abt something, he’ll prob voice his opinion. isn’t afraid to be like “i hate that guy and i don’t want him around” when the guy is literally stood there like ?? chill. i just came to get my copy of great gatsby ??
acts like he’s the shit. conceited prick. self-proclaimed big dick energy, but if u look closer, it reeks of insecurities. absolutely never point that out.
genuinely offended when he can’t be the best/most skillful person in the room, esp if it it’s something he considers himself good at. has bit of a hard time admitting defeat.
fr the most part, his bark seems bigger than his bite. has definitely tried resolving conflicts by going “mooooooom!!!!” at the age of twenty-fuckin’-five. manbaby realness.
guess he can be bit of a fuckboi?? sleeps with a bunch of ladies while looking at boys from afar and going ..... *heavy sigh*. has had a crush on.. quite a few, but he’d rather eat his own hair than ever publicly admit to it.
though, he’s by no means homophobic. jst ... a little unsure of his sexuality n it makes him a lil insecure. bt.. vulnerabilities and ... that sorta stuff?? pfft. not in his household.
also . don’t call him kassidy. he won’t respond. unless you’re his mom. and you’re angry. then he might weep.
WCS:
um. i’ll make a list at some point maybe bt until then.... come punch him in the gut? <3
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Alright it’s time to share my own Claude headcanons:
Note: these will be modern au headcanons and there’s a fair amount of projection. I love comparing HCs and seeing how we all differently characterize the same character, so feel free to share your own/make your own posts/whatever! Now onto Claude Faustus.
Metal head, 100%
Listens to 100 Gecs
Stone walls people he doesn’t particularly find interesting or as a way to protect himself (emotionally). By not showing any emotion, he looks intimidating or boring. It also keeps him calm and in control of situations. He prefers to keep others at a distance.
Definitely more self-aware than he lets on. Many, many people will perceive him as boring or emotionless and he’s okay with that.
Sometimes he’s bothered when people call him boring just because he’s genuinely quiet. This is different than him showing no emotions, as it’s actually just who he is.
Thinks his actions are justified (think Machiavellianism). Despite that, he has a capacity to feel guilt. He just rarely feels guilty about anything he’s done.
Hides a LOT of anger. There’s many little things that piss him off but why should he waste energy on getting upset when he could do so many other things? You wouldn’t even know if you pissed him off.
Claude’s sexuality? Short answer: he’s bi. Long answer: Claude doesn’t define his sexuality in a way humans would do so; he’s attracted to whoever he’s attracted to. If asked, he’ll describe his sexuality as fluid overall.
He 100% identifies as male, though.
What does Claude look for in a partner/love interest/hookup? Claude’s type is: shorter than him, heavier than him (preferably curvy at least), alternative and non-comformative in any sense, not especially emotional, able to partake in his hobbies, not clingy but not entirely independent (he likes to feel wanted/needed), and shares his dark sense of humor.
Built. Sturdy. Broad shoulders. Mans has muscles. I would give him a dad bod AND muscles but IDK
Very active man, a bit of a health nut
Of course the man never cries in front of others.
Can actually appreciate when someone has more energy + is louder than him as a way to cheer him up or just make him laugh, even at their expense. Also if they do that, they can give him a bit more energy. Too much and it gets annoying/draining no matter who’s doing it.
INTJ. Definitely INTJ.
Can participate in social stuff and can fake being extroverted but is really introverted and finds social gatherings draining
Smokes weed
His face drink (alcohol) is red wine.
I think it would be funny if Claude actually needs a strong prescription just so he can see but I think he wears glasses because he likes them.
Triple threat (singer, actor, dancer)
Compared to Sebastian, he’s much more competent (this man does not deserve his right to a brain but he has it)
However, unlike Sebastian, he isn’t a show-off or a perfectionist. He’s a big picture kind of person and doesn’t mind rushing work he doesn’t like doing (side note: Claude is definitely lazier than Sebastian but he refers to this as working smarter, not harder).
One thing he doesn’t rush is cooking. He loves to cook and bake.
Claude is older than Sebastian.
Going back to how little emotion he shows (depending on the people he’s around), he’s a demon, so I imagine that’s also why. He can be smug like Seb, that’s for sure, but demons aren’t typically emotional (in my own HCs/writing that is)
Speaking of demon stuff, I see him as a demon of gluttony (I’ve ranted about this before and will probably do so in another post.
Arrogant and overconfident BUT if he slips up, he doesn’t blame others. He actually apologizes more than one would imagine him doing so.
Can either be very romantic or very Not Romantic .
Weird. Just Weird.
As a genuine explanation for the above, Claude just has goofy/odd tendencies that are either inhuman (prolonged eye contact, studying humans, or make him seem more human (sing along to songs that are playing)
No One Talks About His Long Tongue. I Would Like to Talk About His Long Tongue.
I imagine that Claude didn’t just (forgive my lack of better wording here) “snap” when he tasted Ciel’s blood. I believe it was certainly adding onto a flame, but he was always planning to take Ciel’s soul. Therefore, this goes along with my HC that Claude can show plenty emotion/be more relaxed/be a bit more irrational if he feels comfortable. When he isn’t comfortable/is working/is planning/is hiding something, then he shows no emotion.
Outfit 1: thin turtleneck under a suit jacket and slacks, dress shoes
Outfit 2: metal band tee, leather jacket, black jeans, combat boots
Outfit 3: Business Casual Dad
Outfit 4: Vacation Dad
Likes all animals (and I really mean ALL animals here)
This is admittedly based off of someone else’s HC but he would definitely have a pet tarantula
Gets very defensive when someone kills a spider (especially if they’re in his home)
Crafty yet handy. Loves to crochet, knit, write, paint abstract art, sculpting, and more. The man has many, many hobbies.
Very manipulative, antagonistic, sadistic, controlling, and domineering. I will say that he has a soft spot for his partner and will be decent with them, but he’s still Nasty.
This is essentially canon but Claude can still be so dramatic while also being stoic as hell. He Has The Range.
Can speak various languages fluently (English, Spanish, Japanese, and Latin).
Can speak Russian and Hebrew Not Very Fluently (he picked up the Hebrew from Sebastian).
Can not speak French at all (well, he refuses to learn it, claiming that that’s Sebastian’s thing).
Loves to banter with Seb, other friends, and potential partners.
Also loves to banter with enemies.
I think he gets red in the face easily. He doesn’t blush heavily or even a lot, but if slapped his face will definitely show the imprint of a hand.
I mentioned dark humor; Claude is semi-sarcastic and laughs at self-deprecation jokes/dark jokes that he can relate to.
Constantly overthinks but doesn’t show it. He’s too analytical, if that makes sense.
I HC him as having anxiety but He’s Also a Demon so idk if demons can have GAD but he definitely has the demon equivalent of that.
If you want me to show you how I much I really project onto him, please listen to Lies by Will Jay. You will understand what I mean.
#(here’s a game: guess which HCs are projection and which aren’t)#(i made this solely to add to claude’s tag)#(i just need more claude content)#long post#long post tag#claude faustus#black butler au#black butler 2#black butler#kuroshitsuji#black butler headcanon#kuroshitsuji headcanons#modern au#(there’s hints of Sebastian HCs so here:)#sebastian michaelis#claude faustus x reader#(ish??? i didn’t specify who his partner was but i have an OC that i ship him with)#(sidenote: i love an AU where Claude is Just Decent)#(like i want an ah where he’s just normal and not antagonistic shdhfjfj)#(*au)#(also sorry that this is long AF!!!!)#(wrote this on mobile)#/black butler/
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300 Yuan To Love || Lay
Summary: The road to hell is paved with good intentions and, in this case, some rice cakes along the way. Or: Yixing makes a dumb bet but even when he wins, he loses.
Lenght: 5.4k
Genre: Humour/Fluff/mild Angst
Like with all shitty things in life, at least from a masculine standpoint, it begins with the desire to take a cute girl out on a date.
It’s hot and humid in Hangzhou, as is typical for the summer cycle in this part of China, and Zhang Yixing bikes up to Wang Xun’s cake stand with his balls tucked neatly in his wicker basket. This was his grandma’s doing, really. She knew Yixing needed a job and whilst she was wandering the neighborhood one afternoon, she ran into him.
Had it been anybody else, had it even been written in the Constitution of the People’s Republic of China, then Yixing would’ve immediately said no. But, it just so happens that Yixing is weak for his granny. So, when she returned from her walk, staggering with a fabric trolley full of leeks and other proteins, with a shiny look in her eyes, Zhang Yixing was honor-bound to accept.
Glutinous rice cakes are Zhang Yixing’s worst nightmare, and he starts work the next day
Just the smell is enough to give him a thick sense of nausea. Wang Xun knows this, and Yixing is about ninety-nine-point-nine percent sure that he’s banking off of that. So, what’s it about it all, that has Yixing bike towards there, on a road so quintessential that you could practically hear the 80’s pop music behind him?
Well, he needs a new haircut, that’s what. That, and he wants the opportunity to take his best friend, you, out someplace nice. It’s the latter mostly. Especially the latter.
You both entered Uni not too long ago but only one entered the prestigious option. Spoiler alert, it wasn’t Yixing. It doesn’t bother him much though, because he never intends to be a fancy businessman anyway. He applied to a local college to learn dance, and music theory, which he’s passionate about. On top of that, even though it sees him lose more money than it ever does see him gain it— Yixing enjoys posting his amateur attempts at rapping over on Weibo, which garners some positive feedback.
Meanwhile, there’s you. You’ve been friends with him since the first grade but you’re about as different from him as a banana to a pineapple. You set out to enter business, much like the rest of your family, and Yixing often catches you nowadays during your coffee not-dates in pressed blouses and pencil skirts. Your fierce makeup gives you an air of exclusivity, which makes Yixing’s breezy noncommittal to looking posh, nearly garish.
His idea of having a sense of style is often eclectic and vintage, in conflicting patterns and textures. He got into krumping, and this saw him, in turn, get into wearing blaze red tracksuits and little braids in his hair. It also saw him bleach his hair to the point of no return, which you made fun of him for relentlessly.
The consequence of having such an outlandish appearance—though at this point, he has his hair an ugly, faded red— came one day, full force, during one of your bi-weekly coffee not-dates.
You two were in the midst of a serious conversation when some yuppie mistook your frown as being caused by Yixing’s presence. So, he did what any overbearing yuppie does. He tried to forcibly remove Yixing from the situation with the same technique you use to swat away a pigeon that wants your Kentucky Fried Chicken.
It was embarrassing for all three of you and this is where it does bother Yixing, who’s become notorious for being blissfully unaware of any and everything. For one, he doesn’t see you as often as he wants to, and secondly, a part of him worries he’s slowly sinking beneath you.
Sure, this was a lifelong thing. You’d always come from the better and wealthier family whilst Yixing grew up with his grandparents in a relatively small, rickety house. But you don’t feel these things when you’re ten and frog hunting in the mud, you don’t feel these things when you hold your best friend’s dirty hand at the bus stop to ‘see what it’s like’ on your way to the arcade.
Admittedly, Yixing isn’t super certain as to why he feels the way he feels. He’ll figure this out by the end of the day but he doesn’t know that yet. His pretty face earns him a lot of kind-hearted Jiejies who’re happy to pay for his lunches out of pity. Usually, he’ll open up his phone and add a reminder in his notes to pay them back when he can, and this tends to be the end of his guilt. But, he doesn’t ponder on it too long either.
It’s not exactly in Yixing’s nature to delve too deeply into his own psyche, it’s that naive streak of his. He’s simple-minded and he knows that he is. It keeps him happy and he has that mindset from what he likes, all the way down to what he dislikes.
So, when he finally parks by the stall, over-grown bangs tied in a silly looking bun and testicles in tow, he resolves to approach this in the same way Zhang Yixing approaches all areas of his life:
He’ll just have to do his very best.
“Yixing!” Wang Xun says cheerfully, greeting Yixing with a tight hug after he locks his bike up to an iron fence. “Wow! So handsome!” He beams, pinching at those devastatingly high cheekbones as Yixing’s face quickly goes flush.
“Thank you, Gege.” He replies with a small, polite bow. Yixing’s humble and appreciative demeanor is broken as soon as he glances over at the thick, fragrant slabs of cake, just waiting to be touched, fondled and sold. His skin takes on a greenish hue.
Catching this, Xun thinks now would be a good time to have a little bit of fun with his new employee.
See, this job is often a dull one and last night, his wife, bless her memory, accidentally made double the usual quantity. Even on the busiest day, there’s always at least a bit of leftovers. This usually isn’t much of an issue because there’s a homeless shelter nearby. The only problem? They were quickly becoming tired of being constantly fed leftover rice cakes. Wang Xun hates waste, so he has a plan.
Diddling his fingers, he begins, “I heard from your granny that you want to earn some extra money. I know this doesn’t pay so well, but… How would you like to place a wager?”
Yixing turns to him with a look that is simultaneously hopeful and apprehensive. Wang Xun thinks that, oh yes, this will be fun. Very fun indeed. Unfortunately thouh, the road to hell is paved with good intentions and, in this case, some rice cakes along the way.
For you, whom summer often means being able to forget your studies and instead, focus on your friends and family, this one is already shaping up to be a massive disappointment. Some of your friends went back to their hometowns, whilst others went abroad. The most important contestant though, Zhang Yixing, your closest friend, your secret beloved, had gotten a job.
Your shoulders fell right down to your ankles when you got the news over the phone a night ago. But he sounded so excited that you couldn’t bare to complain. After all, you weren’t his girlfriend. Did Yixing even have a girlfriend? You don’t think you’ve ever heard him talk about any girls, even though he always has at least one woman around him. Maybe he was gay?
You sighed, lying on your back with your phone across your chest.
You only become concerned for Yixing and his mental state, when you find out what his job is, and the strange bet that succeeds it. You receive that text at ten am sharp.
«(Y/N)! Me and Xun-Ge (Do you remember him? He says hi! ^^) Made a bet for three hundred yuan to see who can sell the most rice cakes. The catch is that if we aren’t exact in our measurements, we must eat the surplus. I hope you’ll come and support me!!»
You reply instantly, wondering if all of this is some sick prank but that’s not in his character. Of course you remember Wang Xun, he runs that cake stand near the city square. You like his wife’s cakes but with that you also know…
«Yixing… You hate rice cakes???»
«I know, this means I’ll be even more motivated to win! Please come and support me!»
And this is how you end up on a plastic pull-out chair, watching your best friend torture himself for three hundred yuan, under the hot sun. “Are you ready, Yixing?” Wang Xun asks him and his grin is devilish. You can tell he completely expects Yixing to tank the whole competition.
“I was born ready, Gege! May the best man win!” Yixing grins and throws a little glance over his shoulder, hoping that you think he’s cool.
In that silly ‘Zhang Yixing’ way, he does look pretty cool, especially when he lifts the hem of his neon t-shirt to wipe the sweat from his browbone. The sad thing is that you would put money down the fact that Yixing will lose the three hundred yuan.
Truthfully, he can win this competition on sex appeal alone, if only he was aware of his own pull to begin with. Yixing isn’t though. He never was. He has the habit of presenting himself as a perfect image of self-control. You reckon the only correlation he’s made thus far is that the less clothes he wears, the more the female sex tends to smile around him. It’s a bit silly because Yixing, even now, will still walk around you in nothing but his boxers, as if he doesn’t look like he belongs in a Calvin Klein ad.
Needless to say, you, who has known him since a young age, rarely get to see him eschew from that respectability— sans his semi-nudist tendencies, that is.
Well, that’s until he begins losing the bet. Make no mistake though, Yixing tanks the bet before it can even begin.
“Ahhh, just 0.75? Why not make it a full KG?” Yixing whines at the customer, an older woman with a cold and mysterious look to her. “You don’t need to worry about your diet, Jiejie, you’re beautiful just the way you are. Eat the full kilo, your heart will thank you.”
Wang Xun chortles in the background as No-Name Jiejie rips him a new one. Somewhat offended yourself, you instinctively cross your arms across your soft middle and bite your lip. The next customer is another female, this one about high school aged. She orders a meager 0.25 KG and you try not to look at her with too much jealousy.
As she leaves, she turns to say: “Gege, you’re very handsome, but you shouldn’t make comments about a woman’s body like this. I think it’d be better if you found her and apologized for wounding her pride. Have a nice day~”
She waves before turning on her heels and Yixing looks at you in desperation, not understanding where his sales tactics are failing him. Your response is to cock a brow.
Even before his embarrassing comments, which you can only attribute as being brought on by a semester spent in South Korea, where he held a part time job as the person advertising Gangnam PS on the train, you were already slowly becoming annoyed with him. Why did you even bother to come out here in the first place?
It was unbearably hot and all you’re doing is watching the sweat stain on his back grow and grow while your thighs become welted from the plastic straps on the chair. Your leg skin is ruddy and bumped from shaving the night before and even though you like rice cakes, that and the smell of humid, mowed grass is threatens to make you sick.
Plus, it’s not as if you enjoy watching Yixing lose a dumb bet he should’ve already known he’d never win. By the time the sun is at it’s peak, around one-ish, you confront him behind the pagoda, where he gags in his fist.
“Yixing, I want to go home.” You say with your arms crossed, leaning against a ridged wall as you stare down at the dirt between you two. Yixing instantly looks up— churning stomach be damned. His eyes are wide and his face is a sweaty mess, but despite that, the disappointment is evident.
“You can’t go!” His voice comes out more frantically than it perhaps should. Your teeth dig into your bottom lip, trying not to seem too upset with him. Rather, you wish to simply look like you’re not feeling well. The snap to your tone betrays you though. It always does.
“This is ridiculous. It’s too hot outside and you’re making a goddamn fool out of yourself. What was the point of even having me here?” Yixing’s lips press into a thin line.
“We haven’t hung out in a while so—”
“So you think having me watch you make yourself sick is fun?” Normally, you would dislike the mean edge in your laugh, whenever you got the least bit annoyed with him. It might be the oppressive heat making your adrenaline run higher. Or, maybe, just maybe, Yixing’s lack of negative aspect gets on your nerves a lot more than you’d like to admit. Maybe, a deep, dark part of you wants to see Yixing get annoyed with you too, show you a face more offended than just one of mild hurt.
He doesn’t respond immediately. Instead, Yixing shoves his palms down his back pockets and rocks on his heels. Exhaling through his nose, Yixing opens his mouth to speak but closes up, pouting in a way which makes his lips look even pinker than they already are. It’s aggro, plain and simple.
“Aiyo! All this for an extra three hundred yuan you won’t win anyway?” You scoff, “If you need it so badly, ask me. I’ll lend it to you.”
Finally, his facade cracks and you’re not sure you like what you see. “Three hundred yuan may not mean much to you but it means a lot to others! Not everybody is wealthy like you!” His voice raises an octave, tone turning nasally and thick.
“You’re right. It means jack shit to me.” To prove your point, you reach into your daisy-shaped purse and pull out a few crumpled notes. “That’s why you should just relieve me of my burden and take the fucking yuan.”
Yixing, with his face as red as a chili pepper, gently pushes your hand back towards you. “You’re not treating me like a man.” He says.
Stomping your foot against the grass, you cry out: “Because you aren’t a man, Zhang Yixing!”
With that comes a steady, harsh silence. Yixing looks at you with an expression which you can’t decipher, as it’s not one you’ve ever seen on him. Once the guilt hits, and it hits fast, you let out a choked, “I’m going home. I’ll text you later.”
Just like that, you leave him there, before you lose control of your emotions in an entirely new way. After all, if Yixing never wanted to kiss you before, he certainly isn’t going to want to kiss you now, after what you just said to him.
Throwing your leg across the body of your bike, you push yourself until your knees hurt and Yixing is but a speck in the distance.
Things don’t get any better for Yixing after you leave, if anything, they become even worse, which is saying something. The idea of winning this bet begins to seem more and more fantastical, especially with the strange feeling holding onto his heart.
Whether it’s due to your hurtful words, or an impending heart attack, remains uncertain but one thing is for sure. Yixing has brain cells, and those brain cells are rapidly depleting.
“Ahh!” He screams, in Xiang, out at the neighboring lake and all the people paddle-boating. They stop and look at him like he’s an insane chipmunk. “It’s such a beautiful day!”
Yixing waves his fists around before cramming more baked shame down his gullet. Whilst singing an obscure folk song, he nearly falls over the stony ledge whilst doing a jaunty little dance.
Wang Xun, who has greatly overestimated his own mathematical prowess, as well as his abilities as a businessman, is the one who stops Yixing from meeting his soggy demise.
He places two sobering hands on Yixing’s shoulders. “We still have more cakes to sell.” When he speaks, passerbys can see his soul leave from his lips. Much like Yixing, Wang Xun has consumed so much goddamn cake that he fears he’ll wake up a rice cake. He reconsiders his line of work, but its much too late for that quitter mentality. He and Yixing are in it to the death.
Yixing, gaunt-cheeked, turns around with a rattle. “Gege… I want to give up.” He utters miserably. Xun considers calling the bet off himself but, the sun is setting, twilight is nearly upon them. He’s already lost so much money that unless he returns home victorious, there was a big chance he wouldn’t see the next day as a married man.
He laughs so hard the button holding his jeans together pops and hits Yixing right in the big toe.
“Yeah… Yeah, that’s not happening.”
Once you get home, the first thing you do is kick off your sweaty sandals before lying belly-first across your bed. Your eyes prickle as you shake your head to yourself. This is so stupid, you’re not really about to cry over Yixing again, are you?
Your fingers twist in your bed sheets as a few tears manage to squeeze their way out of your eyes. It seems like you are.
Flipping over so that your nose is in the air, you try to blink away the wetness. Throwing your arm across your face, your thoughts go to how stupid Yixing is. How stupid you are. Anybody with half a functional brain cell could see that you have a crush on him, one which spanned nearly the entirety of your friendship.
In elementary school, it was strange, because you never felt this way about anybody, not even the handsome actors you saw on TV. The only thing you had a full grasp on was that you liked this strange, chubby boy, who was also your close friend— a lot.
He had a sweet penchant for taking care of cats, none of which he could remember to name and whenever you were sad, he would lift his shirt and jiggled his belly.
His grandma also made delicious, albeit very spicy food, and they spoke in a dialect of Chinese which you couldn’t understand but found amusing to listen to. Afterwards, Yixing would let you rest your ear against his soft middle to hear the way his food digested, and all those gurgles and pops.
Your first experience with unrequited love must have been that. When you began wanting to nudge your head, so that your lips could press tender, butterfly kisses between his fleshy, brown rib cage. Instinctively, you knew not to.
High school was bearable, but only because for the majority of it, you were more popular than Yixing.
It was during the second to last year were his height shot and he became taller than most of the other boys. Suddenly, girls started to look at him with the same eyes as you. Suddenly, girls began to notice how handsome he was, how kind he was. It leaves you as you are now, supine on your mattress, unsure where to go from this point on.
With your pride majorly wounded, you stand up and waddle your way across the hall. Rarely are you ever desperate enough to ask your older sister, Mei, for advice. You knock on her door.
“What do you want?” She snaps, sliding off her headset. You take this as the okay to sit on her bed and divulge, and she eyes you with suspicion every step. “It’s just,” You sigh, smacking your lips as your legs cross beneath you. “Do you remember Yixing?”
Her face falls instantly. “Oh no. No. No. Not him again!” She grabs a small My Melody plush from her desk and chucks it towards your head. “Get out. I’m not listening to any of this Yixing shit. If I wanted a Korean drama, I’d go look on Tencent.”
You grabbed the toy and threw it back at her, whining, “I’m serious!!”
Mei kicks your knee with her manicured, cream toes. “Listen!” She cries in exasperation, throwing out her hands. “How many times will you bitch about this? If Zhang Yixing liked you back, he would’ve made a move by now. It’s as simple as that!” Conceding yourself to the understanding that, yes, Yixing doesn’t see you the way you see him, you look down at the small floral decals over her nailbed and begin to pick with a puffed cheek. “I understand that, Jiejie… But I may have said something mean to him.”
Seeing the sad look on your face makes Mei relent. “Then apologize to him, dummy.” She sighs as you lay across your side, clutching her foot to you as you try to hold back tears. She pushes herself closer, replacing her foot with a hand in yours, using the spare to push some wet strands from your face.
“Look,” She rolls her eyes, though she’s taken on a gentler tone. “Zhang Yixing sees you as a friend. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t have stuck by your side for all of these years. If you said something mean to him, just tell him you weren’t feeling well and that you’re sorry. He seems like a nice guy, I’m sure he’ll forgive you easily. But before that, I think you need to forgive him for not being able to return your feelings, (Y/N). You’re always getting into these petty arguments, it seems to me like you’ve become bitter over your unrequited feelings. You need to make peace with the fact that you’re his friend and nothing but, or else the day will come where Zhang Yixing will no longer feel like accepting your apologies.” You nod, but why does it hurt so much to let go of this love, even if it’s hopeless?
Eventually, after you calm yourself down and rinse off your face, you begin to feel more and more uncomfortable with the way you’ve treated him. It grows and it grows until you can’t take it anymore. You set off to try and find him and, hopefully, make things right again.
“I lost, didn’t I?” Yixing breathes, sitting on the stone steps as Wang Xun begins to pack up for the day. With an apologetic smile, the older man replies, “Yes, but barely.”
“Ahhh,” He sighs, looking up at the stars. Today has been a real nightmare. It seems like nothing he set out has accomplish. He’s offended people for no reason, rocks live in his stomach and worst of all, you’ve become upset with him. Yixing swallows thickly.
“(Y/N)’s become rather feisty since I’ve last seen her.” Xun points out. “She has.” There’s a silence before Yixing adds, “Gege, I don’t know if there’s room for me in her life anymore. The more I think of it, the more I feel I don’t belong by her side. We used to laugh and smile together but nowadays, whenever I call her out, she’s tense. We never used to fight this much, I think she thinks I’m beneath her, and is only trying to spare my emotions.”
Wang Xun takes a seat next to him, stretching out his legs before glancing up at the sky as well. “All this because of what she said?” Yixing doesn’t respond, which is confirmation enough.
“Women— No, not just women, people will often say things they don’t mean when they feel as though they’ve been hurt.” He says, “I think the same is true for her. She’ll apologize soon enough, so don’t take her words to heart.” Pause. “And if she doesn’t? There are so many more women out there for you to pine after. Eventually, you’ll find the one who doesn’t break your heart.”
Neither of them speak after this, not until something, or rather somebody, catches Yixing’s eye. It’s the Jiejie from earlier. Excusing himself, Yixing jogs up to her.
She stops the moment she sees him and scowls. “What do you want?” She snaps, her dog running off into the bushes. Her expression is so fierce, it reminds him a bit of yours.
Though he freezes up, he pushes past it and she jumps back when he bows so deeply, there’s a crack to his spine.
“I wanted to say that I’m really sorry if I offended you earlier today,” Yixing blushes, “You see, I had a bet with that man over there.” He points over to Wang Xun, who’s in the process of cleaning his ear out with his pinkie. “And I’m afraid in my attempt to earn a bit of extra pocket money, I’ve said and done some things I normally wouldn’t say or do. I hope you can forgive me.”
The woman stood there stunned and Yixing is afraid that might not be enough. She thinks of his apology for a second before shaking it off. “I see,” She nods pensively. “I take it, this was all for your girlfriend’s sake?” Yixing stands up straight, blinking a few times for clarity.
“What girlfriend?”
“The girl that sat behind you, she wasn’t your girlfriend?” Yixing shakes his head. “Christ…” She mumbles, instantly grateful that she’s already lived through the ‘stupid love’ phase. She sighs.
“I forgive you. We all have lapses in our judgment and as long as you understand that, and think before you speak next time, I don’t see a reason to hold it against you.”
“Thank you, Jiejie!” Yixing says with a big, happy grin, bowing deeply once more. His heart clears itself a tiny bit.
Unfortunately for his cardiovascular health, at this moment, you bike up next to him and Yixing’s heart is back to feeling like it’s about to burst. Shit.
“Sorry, am I interrupting something?” You ask, much to the woman’s amusement. “No. Me and your ‘friend’ over here were just touching base. I need to go home anyway.” She says, tugging the leash so that her puppy comes running back at her ankles.
As she turns around, she makes sure to tack on a “Good luck!” It’s for both of your sakes.
You park your bike up by the tree trunk, feeling the awkwardness finally hit. It’s already nightfall and the air has cooled off significantly, but you’re so ashamed that your cheeks are blazing and hot.
“Did you apologize to her for earlier?” You ask despite its redundancy. Yixing nods and you can see it from the illumination caused by the lampposts. “I did.”
“That’s good!” You hum, trying to keep your voice steady as you fish a green, rectangular bottle out of your purse. “I got you a probiotic drink to help you with… y’know. Here. Catch.”
It lands in his hands and Yixing beams brighter than the stars. “Why are you smiling at me like that?” You furrow your eyebrows. “Because you came back.”
Saying it outloud only has Yixing smile wider and it eats up at his eyes in the most charming of ways. You feel your heart throb.
Clearing your throat, you stutter out. “Right! About that…” You will yourself not to mask your true emotions with the air of nonchalance but you meet his eyes and, fuck, you might as well do that or just start crying.
“I’m sorry about what I said earlier. I didn’t mean any of it. It was wrong and I regret ever treating you this way.” You expect Yixing to hold a more serious stance, but he laughs, opening his arms.
“Aw, it’s alright. Come here and give me a hug.”
Slowly, you take steps towards him before burrowing into his chest, hands fisting against his shirt as tears begin to prickle in your eyes. Yixing smells too sweet and sweaty but past that, you can feel the warmth of his skin. His body is solid yet comforting and you want to be in his arms all day and all night.
“Why are you crying?” Yixing asks, feeling the moisture through his shirt. and you laugh dryly. He sways you side to side before pulling at your face. “If you cry, I might start crying too.”
Yixing’s fingers release from your skin and instead, move to hold you. “So, no crying, alright?” The touch makes you breathless.
“Yixing, I…” The words slip past your lips before you can stop them. He tilts his head, smiling softly in anticipation. Should you confess to him? You already know you have to let this go. Will it make your shoulders lighter if he knows how you feel? You shake your head at yourself.
No. Yixing is too delicate of a person to treat you the same knowing you’ve fallen for him. Seeing your knees buckle, Yixing leads you to the bench. Swallowing your heart, you resolve for the next best truth.
“Yixing, I’ve missed you a lot.” “Oh! I’ve missed you too.” Yixing responds with an annoying ease, uncapping the pribiotic before taking a sip. He grimaces at the bitter taste, making you giggle at his cute reaction. As you laugh, Yixing’s heart does a somersault and suddenly, there’s not enough air in the world. It’s an emotion that only you cause in him. Not even the prettiest girls give him this type of feeling and it puts him on edge, but in the most tender way.
“Why did you accept this bet anyway?” You ask, gazing at the lake, which is now devoid of people. Steady and dark, with the reflection of the moon.
Yixing considers it. “I think I did it to feel better about myself.” He leans back and caps the bottle, fingers almost touching yours as he holds the bottle between his knees.
He stares up at the silver moon.
You turn to look at him in surprise, gazing at his profile. Yixing catches you in his peripheral and nods with a sheepish smile. “Yeah.”
He swallows and then adds, “My hair needs fixing and…” He considers closely the next thing he’s about to say, but throughout the past several hours, this is the only conclusion he can draw. The more he says the words in his head, the righter they feel. “And I wanted to take you out on a date.”
Your eyes widen and Yixing grabs your hand, too afraid that you’ll run from him again. “But I lost the bet, so there’s that.” He mumbles.
With the air squeezed from your lungs, you whisper, “We don’t need money to—”
“I know we don’t, but I wanted it anyway. It was selfish and vain of me, I know. But, I thought… Maybe if I had more money, you’d be more inclined to see me as a man… As somebody you can actually date.”
Taking the leap of faith, you lace your fingers through his. Yixing squeezes tight and you close your eyes, reveling in the warmth of his hand. Years. It’s been years since he’s done this.
You’ve waited so long, since that day at the bus stop, to feel his hand on yours again and for it not be just to see what it feels like. Finally, you feel like you can breathe. It fits as perfectly against yours as it did back then.
“I’m sorry for what I said earlier. I do think of you as a man. I’m sorry that I’m bitter and dramatic. I’ve taken these emotions out on you without realizing it, all because I’m bothered that you don’t see me the way I’ve seen you throughout all these years. I hope you can forgive me, I’ve been a bad friend.”
“When you speak with such a voice,” Yixing laughs, “It’s impossible for me not to. I’m scared of what you could do to me.”
There’s a silence and you bring his knuckles up to your lips. Yixing’s eyes flutter shut with a lazy grin.
There’s never been such a perfect moment in his life.
“I like you just the way you are.” You whisper, the feeling is just about the same for you too. “Thank you.”
“And I’ll wait patiently for you to take me on the date you feel we deserve.” “Thank you.”
He repeats as you two lean against each other and enjoy the serenity of an empty park. If this is what all these years have been working towards, then it must all be worth it in the end. It may not be a crescendo of epic proportions, a searing, tear-filled kiss in the rain, a loud, emotional ‘I love you’ shouted in the middle of a crowded airport, but this is perfect.
Zhang Yixing can turn the mundane into something extraordinary, this is what’s most beautiful about him to you. For a moment, it’s all quiet and that’s just fine.
Until he gets sick all over a bundle of Lotus roots, that is.
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115. Tonight’s Fair Game HC is one not to be...KISSED!
Who doesn’t love a good first kiss?
Now, who doesn’t love an awkward accidental first kiss?
Good, because that’s what we’re doing tonight!
I’ve wanted to do this one for a while now, and you can all thank @skybird13 for giving me the push I needed to go for it! Also, I do intend to do other interpretations of their first kiss at some point in the future, so keep an eye out for that one of these days!
But for this HC, there is no delay, so let’s get to it!
I’d like to think that before the kiss happens, Qrow is actually talking about Clover over lunch with at least one of his nieces and her friends. Ruby or someone points out how different they are and how they expected them to not get along, let alone actually become close, and Qrow points out that Clover’s not so bad, actually. He praises him a bit, and it’s all cute and fluffy.
As the conversation ends, Qrow gets a message on his scroll that he’s needed for a new mission, and zips off to the briefing room as he reads the rest of the message, making sarcastic comments to himself about the far-too serious way this minor Grimm attack is being worded in the note.
Coming from the opposite side of the door, someone says hi to Clover as he walks, and Clover turns to say hi to them as he heads inside the mess hall.
Just as they both hit the door frame, well, let’s just say their worlds collide quite literally.
Neither is looking where they’re going, and by the time they realize what’s about to happen, it’s too late to stop it.
The two are launched face first into a kiss.
An accidental kiss is like jumping into a cold pool (At least, I think -- Look, you’ve gotta do at least a little bit of projection when you have a nonexistent romantic history, but a love of shipping, so bear with me here). You’re absorbed by the shock of it almost too much to really get a sense of how it makes you feel.
The kiss holds for a few seconds, but it’s purely because of that very same shocked state.
As they pull away, both pause, still close together, speechless for a few seconds as they try to figure out what to say because WOW, are they in an awkward situation!
Neither wanted this kiss...but that’s not because they don’t like each other (QUITE the contrary). But this is NOT how they ever expected a first kiss to go.
If they say something to try to explain it or apologize for it, they risk alienating the other.
If they say nothing, well, what does THAT say about their feelings?
And not only that, but there are other people present! There’s at least two kids that Qrow’s close with in there, and everyone at the base knows Clover.
Talk about awkward…
(More under the cut)
Clover, while looking for a solution, catches a glimpse of Qrow’s scroll out of the corner of his eye, and within seconds, hatches a plan.
“Oh, good! I was looking for you. Now, come on! We’ve got Grimm with our names on ‘em.”
Qrow’s still clearly semi-frozen in shock, so Clover grabs his hand, and pulls him out of the mess hall. They walk together until they’re confident enough that they’re alone.
Both relax against the wall, Clover’s hand still loosely holding Qrow’s.
“You would think with semblances like ours, we’d be entitled to at least one or two boring days when we’re together,” Clover jokes.
Clover can tell Qrow’ not completely fine, but he appreciates the small smile that follows the quip all the same.
“It’s never that easy.”
He and Clover snort at that reality, their hands naturally separate, and for the briefest of seconds, everything between them feels alright.
But that moment of relative comfort doesn’t last long beyond that retort’s reaction.
They kissed, and suddenly it feels like everything about the relationship they’ve spent weeks building is on the line.
And that’s because Clover knows it is.
Though they’re not looking at each other anymore, Clover can feel Qrow’s anxiety radiating off of his skin like aura. He’s pretty sure he’s feeling that way too.
What’s more, now that he’s aware that Qrow has a mission, he knows that this conversation has a deadline before resolved or not, Qrow has to take off.
Clover knows he can just play off the kiss with another quip -- a boost of his own ego with his kissing skills would surely relax Qrow enough to stop thinking about it -- but he doesn’t want to do that, or at least not in that way.
Just as much as he wants to protect Qrow’s feelings...he also wants to protect his own.
Because he likes Qrow -- he likes Qrow a lot -- and he doesn’t want an accident of all things to rob him of his chance to act on those feelings.
Then a thought crosses Clover’s mind: Clover knows why he’s reluctant to joke off the kiss.
But why hasn’t Qrow said anything?
Qrow may be self conscious, but as they’ve gotten closer, Qrow’s also shown he more than up to the tasks of trading quips and blows with Clover over all manner of topics. To them these days, it’s all but second nature, and little is off limits to play around with in their endless duel of smart remarks.
Something like an accidental kiss shouldn’t be a big deal to Qrow…
Unless it reflected something Qrow indeed did want.
If neither of them had an inkling of that desire, they would’ve joked the kiss off like it was nothing. Hell, if even one of them did, the non-reciprocant still wouldn’t have taken it seriously.
That could only mean…
“Want to get dinner tonight?” The words jump out of Clover’s mouth before he can even hope to control them. But since they’re out, Clover, with confidence in himself and Qrow’s feelings now rock hard, follows them wholeheartedly, intentionally leaving not space for so much as an ounce of doubt that Clover wants this to go exactly where Qrow thinks it will.
Qrow’s reaction is akin to a deer’s when it’s caught in headlights. His vulnerabilities are all captured in his shock.
But fortunately for Clover, nowhere in that shock is there disappointment, overly abundant reluctance, disgust, or even all that much fear.
Qrow bites his lower lip, and Clover can’t help the worry lines that appear on his forehead as he waits for his answer.
Finally, Qrow looks at him. His crimson eyes house concern. “I still have that mission,” he says, his tone dark as he swings off the wall to an upright position with his own momentum. “I don’t know how long it will last.”
“I can come,” Clover suggests quickly. “We could...make a date out of it...if you want, that is...”
Clover smiles hopefully.
And after a frame of even more shock that leaves Clover on the edge of hysteria, Qrow smiles back at him.
“I don’t see why not. Saves me some of the heavy lifting,” he says, shrugging. “I must be one hell of a kisser for you to offer to fight Grimm for me after just one of them.”
“Well, you were good, but I'm curious to see if that’s the best you can do.”
“If you’re lucky, I might just give you the chance to find out for yourself.”
“Well, I DO specialize in all things luck, so I think I’ll have that answer before you know it.”
Qrow snorted. “Looking forward to it.”
Tagging @homokinetic @skybird13 @whipped4qrow @mooksie01 @luck-of-the-caw @xwildangel @solitude-of-stars @magneto-is-neato @o0nashipear0o @unfairgamey @doctorrwby @clover-and-co @megan-atthedisco @wash-my-brain @bisexualdisasterqrow @baelonthebrave @doubledexterity @rwby-things-i-guess @atlas-heartthrob @the-answer-was-bi-klance @compoterie @thuskindlyiboop @oceansquid @transdemion @deltastream21 @mimiori @xya-hunter @delta-altair @genderfluidturtle @roman-torchtwink @subatomictealeaves @drbtinglecannon @saphiralunaris @pretentiouskneecaps @lonelybeep
Want to be tagged in future Fair Game HC’s? Of course, you do! So, send me a reply, PM, or ask to be added, and I’ll grant your greatest wish! XD
#fair game#qrow branwen#clover ebi#rwby#lucky charms#luckbirds#luck birds#qrow x clover#qrover#fair game hcs#115
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|ROLL DEEP|M| P.1
*Yoongi centered fic with a shared OT7 plot*
CH.1.1 CH. 1.2
**Operation: What’s eating blue!?***
_________________________________________________________
“Stop, this stopped being a you, thing and became a us thing the minute we chose to show up here tonight! You gave us an out and we stayed...we will always stay...”
1.2 K Sneak Peek
Pairing: Yoongi x OC
Genre: Sugar baby AU/Suspense/Smut/Angst/Roomate AU/FWB AU
WC: 7K
Nonsexual Warnings: Mentions of drug use (Molly/weed/)Strong language/ Alcohol addictions/ brief mentions/ speculations of domestic violence/abuse
Sexual Warnings: Oral (M & F receiving) power bottom Min Yoongi, cum play, breath play, spanking, dirty talk, Slight overestimation, sex toys (Cock rings....) Semi-public sex (A chill little blow job in the car) The sexual warnings are for both parts of CH.1 so the smut is split in half!
NOTE: Just to clarify the dynamic Yoongi and the OC are roommates who hookup on the side, they are BOTH sugar babies to two separate people! So yes, that would imply that Yoongi and some of the other boys who are also sugar babies are Bi. There is no MxM but there is mentions of it occasionally….as well as some harmless ot7 flirting! Also all of the boys are introed, Tae and Joon just play a lager part here!
_______________________________________________
I guess, fuck where do we even start? Maybe, will go back to where it all technically started, which was the last time things felt...somewhat normal yeah?
So, that would be...hmm...about 2 weeks shy of you heading into Junior year at USC right? The day your boys picked you up at the airport, and the three of your treated Blue, aka TaeTae to brunch!?
Well, wait let’s back track a little it all started much eariler than that, because you weren’t even aware of your brunch plans until later in the day. So Initially the day in question kicks of with you, in oversized blacked out CHLOE shades, hungover as fuck, sat in at the airport one Sunday afternoon. Smack dab in the middle of Terminal 6, in a bar called Blu2o sipping on a Bloody Mary, scrolling aimlessly through Snapchat. While simotaniously being told for the very first time ...that you’ll be attending a “Haute Couture” themed charity auction...on Tuesday! Yup, the day after tomorrow! Thank god he can’t see your damn face right now, biting down on your straw to muzzle yourself!
“No, babe it’s fine, I’ll just hit Rodeo tomorrow morning, and I’m sure my nail and lash girl can fit me-Oh you...haven’t gotten... what ...your wearing either?” Parroting the words back In slow motion as if it would make the words sound better or something!
Oh for fucks sake! Bringing your forehead flush to the marble bartop already feeling a full blown migraine brewing at the nape of your neck. Giving yourself a couple moments to self compose, this man is so damn unorganized it’s unfucking real. His personal assistant better be the 2nd highest paid person within his entire company because…..This is far from new, I don’t even know why your suprised and I’d say you don’t get paid enough for this....but ya do! So you suck it up, lose the attitude and slip right into your “Yes sir” or maybe I should say ‘Yes daddy” voice.
“Don’t worry about it, I know your busy. I totally get it, your a 28 waist right? Of course, I remember...I remember everything you tell me….Ohhh your gonna let me put you in color too???” Eyes flickering up to the notification from your bank, noting a cute little 12k wire pending.
“Yeah, no, I see it, that should be good. I was thinking Versace or Cavili for you anyway...they have good prints to fit the theme, and if all else fails I have my card too…yup..just landed about..hmm... 30 minutes ago actually. Of course, stop apologizing, Sunday's are always your golf days, I get it, hey, tell the guys I said hi and enjoy your day. Text me later if you feel up to it..k....bye..”
Were you actually getting a little flustered there towards the end? It's the slight accent, isn't it? Honestly, it didn't take much for you to slip into “character” with him, even after barely being together a full month. For one he wasn’t an asshole, had a decent sense of humor, and he’s really fuckin hot...however there was one, little, well shit, not so little issue...you noticed while with him recently. Which, then sparked quite a few questions while also answering some that had been rattling through your head since the day you met. But will circle back to the fact that you spent a week on vacation with a man, while dressed in some of the sexiest pieces of 2019 couture! Yet..you barely got touched once outside of a couple chaste kisses and hand-holding while at the two fashion shows you attended together… so, yeah, yeah!
A low groan in frustration rattled from your throat as you continued scrolling through Snapchat, trying to come up with some possible outfit scenarios in your head! It’s kinda funny, how mynute all of that seems now though, how your definition of “Stress” that day was you trying to decide if your sugar daddy was gay, while also finding time to fit in a self-care day, shopping, and getting your books for school!! The fact that, that was what you considered migraine worthy, fuck, what you wouldn’t give to consider multitasking your only maltitude of “stress” again …..
Just in your own little world, mind swirling with a couple of stylists you’ve met along the way, considering the idea of them pulling some vintage pieces for you instead! What you should be doing, is scrolling through your contact list and texting said stylists, instead you find yourself more and more distracted. Getting lost in the mounds of snap updates from Jimin as he “modestly” sunbathed in a private villa in Italy. Then later sharing a glimpse into his shopping spree from Versace, no doubt a good 20k worth of Italian luxury spread out along the plush white sheets. Sending him a cheeky little “That’s my boy” with a couple of smug winky faces in response!
It’s still kinda crazy to think, things like that are considered normal within your world now, the fact that you aren’t even surprised at the number of gifts. Or, simply the fact that your barley 21-year-old best friend is sunbathing in Italy on someone else’s dime. Then again, you just got sent 12 thousand dollars to spend on an event that would last maybe all of 5 hours, while sitting next to a stack of Louis Vuittion luggage from your first class flight in from Vegas, technically. Opting to land there first after a long 15-hour flight, checking in at The Four Seasons for not even a solid 24 hours before coming home! Honestly?There was no real reason for the pit stop except it gave you an excuse to see a friend while also allowing you to unwind in one of your favorite hotels!
That sentence alone is actually absurd when you really think about it, the idea of you casually booking flights and suites in 5-star hotels as if you’re ordering off the damn dollar menu at Mcdonalds! You, the girl that was working two jobs at the Groove and mourning a piece of shit cheating ex boyfriend her freshman year of college.....is now reminiscing about catching flights to chill with friends and last minute finding dresses for Couture themed galas.Like, what the actual fuck is life.... Oh my bad, life at the moment is constantly being paranoid that you and your friends will get arrested! Life in this moment however...was a fucking perfect!
The friend you where meeting in Vegas was Hoseok by the way, the redhead was currently vacationing in Sin City for the next couple of days, typically residing in LA as well. Just Chillin’ before the semester starts, living his best life, which revolves around “OFF-WHITE'' shopping sprees, private dance lessons, and constantly taking thirst trap pics for his 10’s of thousands of followers online. He randomly texts you saying “I miss your face” you text him saying “I land at 8 tonight bring a bottle and sushi to room 605 at The Four Seasons hotel '' Simple!
Your initial flight, the one that was 15 hours, was originally from Paris, where you spent the last week or so with Jeong-su, being arm candy, sipping wine, sightseeing and of course shopping!. Barley 32 hours ago your Snapchat looked pretty damn similar, if not worse in comparison to Jimin’s but what can I say, you can’t be in the home of Givenchy and Gaulthier and not go to Givenchy and Gaultier!
What your life is, what you and your friends do, I mean, I think it’s safe to say it’s pretty self-explanatory yeah? The average 20 something-year-old in college isn't flying themselves out of the country or going luxury shopping without a little help. In your case, it’s typically thanks to a person you commonly refer to as “Daddy” now, the context behind the word however….is where you and your friends may differ from others…..
But that’s your business, your concern and more importantly your choice, and honestly for a while life seemed too damn good to be true...I guess looking back on it now, I guess that’s because it kinda was!
Sat at the predominantly empty bar alone, more than content by the silence, twirling your straw between your lips, as you scanned back over the shit show that was your schedule for the semester! Getting more of a migraine from that, then shopping or even the fact that you're still hungover and drinking on an empty stomach at half-past 12. Shooting a quick text to your redheaded best friend cursing him out for getting you drunk off your ass on a bottle of Yamazaki 12.
“Can I get anything else for you beautiful? Another drink or maybe an appetizer? We have damn good loaded queso fries if I do say so myself!” Waving the menu in your face playfully, the warm, inviting voice in front of you was the bartender, who’s had his eye on you since you swayed in. Even if you looked like crap for your standards you knew to most you were the farthest thing from it as you swayed into the bar like you owned the place. In your heels, and tiny little black dress, while an airport assistant trolied in your luggage behind you! Ohhh Blair Waldorf would without a doubt be proud!
“Mmmm…” Lips pursed in a slight pout as you raked over the menu, honestly, you were hungry and they have bomb ass fried pickles…..”Actually, yeah, I’ll get-”
“ 3 tall shots of whatever top-shelf Tequila you have, also add whatever she’s been drinking to my tab, along with an order of fried pickles with extra ranch…please and thank you!” Smoothly sliding his black card, and ID across the marble bartop for review.
Oh.
The look on the bartender’s face was fucking priceless, torn between shitting himself and maybe….nah, just straight shitting himself! Skin flushed, the sense of panic was clear as day, wondering if he’d overstepped that fine line between customer service and filtration. Considering whoever the person behind you is, clearly knows you well enough to know your food order. A forced bashful smile playing along his lips as he bowed out in acknowledgment, sliding the gentelmen back is ID and whispering out a faint “Yes sir, coming right up…”
The base vibrating through your ears instantly had you readjusting your posture, a strong tingle running down your spine, back arching ever so slightly. A playful smirk playing along your lips as you slowly laced your tongue back around your staw, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear.
“You sure you wanna do that? My tastes are pretty expensive..” Tone blatantly flirtatious, yet you still hadn’t bothered to even turn around, that’s when suddenly you hear a deep arrogant chuckle rumbling low in his chest. Only...this sounds a little brighter? And like it’s coming from your left instead of behind you…
“Mmm, I’m sure we can handle it baby….”
You could feel the air shift behind you, it felt warmer, and there was a strong mix of scents flooding through your nose. Leaning back in your seat, pleasantly finding your shoulders, the back of your neck, and your head, cradled against a lean wall of silk. Sighing contently, naturally letting your body melt into his frame, nose running into your face as you smiled so hard your cheeks hurt. That’s when a gangle of veiny, porcelain limbs wrapped around your shoulders pulling you even tighter against him, only to find brown, sharp, cat-like eyes staring down at you, though a pair of translucent designer shades. Seemingly a little bit amused at how excited you are to see him. Long dark wavy locks falling messily into his face, a tiny silver hoop dawning his button nose. Tongue playing at the corner of his mouth, letting the tiny silver ball slip between his lips. This angle lets you really appreciate how sharp, yet soft his features were, an oxymoron that honestly makes no damn sense unless you see him in person….jawline sharp enough to cut glass yet he has the cutest cheeks ever when he smiles. It honestly makes no sense whatsoever and he’s one of the many reasons you have trust issues. Well, that and your line of work, considering the number of men you find out are married and still try and sneak around with you.
Then, as if to just make his presence known, there’s another pair of hands making their home along your body, gently squeezing your thigh. Except, he’s polar opposite to the person I just described, the man behind you is your roommate Yoongi, the man who just took a seat to your left, is your other roommate Namjoon! First off, he’s tall as all hell, and an offensively perfect shade of brown, he can’t even go into the burbs without being asked what self-tanner he uses. In which he smugly replies “Genetics” letting them sit there and try and google said company that makes that brand of self-tan. Streams of meticulously placed colored neo-traditional tattoos paint his skin, accompanied by deep dimples, and bleach blonde hair styled into an undercut, sides buzzed into the perfect fade.
“So you gonna get up and give me a real hug or what???” Placing a kiss in your hair as he pulled back, giving you room to hop out of your seat and right into his arms.
The Full thing is coming soon, this is from summer 2019, I just have to edit, and reread the full thing again! I also wrote the first 3 parts all at once..sooo if your exicted show this some love anddddddddd come let me know!
Love you as always,
Rocki
#Yoongi#yoongi smut#yoongi au#yoongi x reader#namjoon#namjoon au#taehyung#taehyung au#bts au fic#bts au#bts smut#kpop smut kpop au#kpop au#min yoongi
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oc facts: charlie
no one tagged me i just love her a lot
PLACE IN SOCIETY
✖ FINANCIAL – wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty
like all of my oc/canon girls, charlie is filthy rich - and all of it came from her parents, a politician/university professor and a med school lecturer/a highly respected surgeon. some of those money her parents got from their families; but the point is - charlie never had to worry about money.
(until she met her soon-to-be husband who robbed her blind.)
charlie has no problems with sharing her wealth with those in need - she frequently donates to various fundraising campaigns.
✖ MEDICAL – fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged
she’s bit of a couch potato, and a bit clumsy too; she certainly wouldn’t run in a marathon, and finds herself out of breath after a short, intense jog - but it’s nothing too severe. what she lacks in shape, she makes up with agility - she practices yoga, which renders her a tad more agile than an average person.
she still can’t do a lot of things though.
✖ CLASS OR CASTE – upper / lower / middle / working / unsure
charlie is, whether she likes it or not, a member of the social elite. her father spent two terms as a mayor of metropolis when she was a kid, and is an active politician, and a college professor. her mother is a globally renowned as a surgeon and comes from european nobility. charlie grew up with children of ceos, leaders, celebrities - and even after the untimely demise of her parents at the hands of her husband and moving to metropolis, she still finds herself amount the elite, quickly befriending bruce wayne himself, as well as getting cautious attention of the maroni crime family, one of gotham’s assistant district attorneys and thomas elliot - one of gotham’s golden boys, a highly esteemed surgeon and her mother’s pet student.
and whether all of this is good... that is a different matter entirely.
✖ EDUCATION – qualified / unqualified / studying
charlie has a master’s degree in english literature - nothing more, and nothing less.
FAMILY
✖ MARITAL STATUS – married, happily / married, unhappily / engaged / partnered / divorced / widow or widower / separated / single / it’s complicated
she’s a widow - because she killed her husband. it was an ugly mess of a situation - he killed her parents, stole her fortune (in the canon verse - in various aus this changes, depending on what I have in mind) and ran away, prompting her to go on a wild goose chase across the globe, culminating in her finally tracking him down and stabbing him to death with an ice pick.
one thing she hadn’t expected though was ending up in a long-term, happy, loving relationship with oz: gotham’s prodigal son, a failed revolutionary and a loyal friend to his (at times unwilling) loved ones.
✖ CHILDREN – has children / no children / wants children / adopted children
the idea of motherhood is kinda scary to her - she’s not opposed to being a cool aunt to someone else’s kid though.
(in chasing echoes oswald is eventually going to pull jason todd to his side, and charlie’s gonna develop a fun, unexpectedly satisfying relationship with bruce’s troubled ex-errand boy.)
✖ FAMILY – close with sibling / not close with siblings / has no siblings / siblings are deceased / it’s complicated
✖ AFFILIATION – orphaned / adopted / disowned / raised by both parents / it’s complicated
even though charlie - painfully aware of her own personal mediocrity - sometimes felt like she doesn’t quite fit in with her social, accomplished parents - they still made a happy family. for various reasons, her relationship with her mother - eleanor - was always just a bit strained and tense; but it was still, above everything else, loving.
TRAITS & TENDENCIES
✖ disorganized / organised / in between
if left to her own devices, charlie’s going to inevitably scatter her belongings everywhere, forget about doing the dishes and start getting late to things. due to unfortunate depression - time simply flows differently for her.
✖ close-minded / open-minded / in between
charlie is very open-minded, thanks to her father being an outspoken leftist - perhaps even a bit too open-minded. after the split-second of initial confusion, she’d be willing to accept everything - even a violent “revolution”. even an unjust revenge. some may call it open-mindedness; others - naivete.
✖ cautious / reckless / in between
in general, she’s rather cautious - mostly thanks to overwhelming depression and anxiety that make her doubt her every move.
✖ patient / impatient / in between
most of the time, she’s patient - but then come those times when she’s waiting for oz to hurry up and pay attention to her. then, suddenly, she’s the most impatient, almost nagging person you’ve ever met. it has a lot of charm though, because she’s well-aware of being a pain in the ass.
✖ outspoken / reserved / in between
this is something her parents taught her - have your opinion, but know a time and place for it. don’t reveal too much to people you don’t trust, or to people you want to see gone. after all, her mother did come from a noble family, and her father did have a political career. even if he kept challenging his rivals to fistfights.
✖ leader / follower / in between
charlie has absolutely NO desire to lead, or to be in the spotlight - and to be honest... she kind of doesn’t understand people who do. it’s just too responsible, too difficult, too stressful.
✖ sympathetic / unsympathetic / in between
charlie has a lot of sympathy for other people - and that’s why her short-lived marriage with a con artist struggling to pay off his debt to the mafia was so tragic: she would’ve helped him if he asked, no questions asked.
✖ optimistic / pessimistic / in between
though she might appear to be an optimistic ray of sunshine - she’s actually very, very pessimistic. she actually did go through her fair share of feeling deeply let down by people in her life; so she tends to look at every relationship - and every possible scenario - without a glimmer of hope.
✖ hardworking / lazy / in between
you know how i said she inherited a fortune from her parents?
yeah.
(to be fair, she did work hard for her degree, so it’s not like she doesn’t know how to put effort into things. she simply never really had to put that effort into anything, thanks to her financial stability.)
✖ cultured / uncultured / in between
despite appearing as a ditzy socialite only interested in fashion and gossip - charlie is actually very cultured. she knows quite a lot about many topics, from french cuisine to religious traditions of indigenous cultures; her parents made sure she knows as much about the world as possible.
the problem is - she’s painfully disinterested in most of those topics, instead pretending to stick to things she’s actually into: fashion, games, literature.
✖ loyal / disloyal / in between
all it takes to earn her loyalty is to give her affection and attention; and she’ll be yours forever. she’s also not above being loyal to two people whose causes clash; she can be loyal to her lover, who wishes to kill harvey dent - but also to her friend, who wants to see dent flourish.
✖ faithful / unfaithful / in between
she’s faithful, she’s monogamous, she’s not afraid to wrap herself around her partner in public to make sure everyone sees how much in a relationship they are with each other.
(she might sometimes fantasize about doing the deed with someone other than her partner though. like fish mooney, because have you SEEN fish mooney? charlie had.)
SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION
✖ SEXUALITY – heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual / omnisexual / demisexual
charlie is bi, without any actual preference for her partner’s gender. fate (me, it was me, it wasn’t fate) caused her to mostly end up getting intimate with guys - but her first partner was a girl, she’s very into fish mooney and selina kyle and she did once have a massive crush on lex luthor’s sister.
✖ SEX – sex repulsed / sex neutral /sex favorable
charlie LOVES sex - but only with the right person. she’s definitely not against talking about it with people she’s only platonically involved with, and has nothing against having others go at it in appropriate semi-public spaces, assuming it doesn’t go too far.
but yeah. she likes sex. it makes her feel good, plain and simple - and she likes the sense of connection between her and her partner, as well as feeling comfortably vulnerable and excited.
✖ ROMANCE – romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable
charlie really craves romance. she wants - needs - to both feel the butterflies in her stomach, and to be a source of someone else’s butterflies. she craves the casual intimacy, tender words, affectionate gestures... it’s all like water to her: an absolute necessity.
✖ SEXUALLY – sexually adventurous / sex experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious / uninterested
while she’s not actually very experienced - she has a lot of fantasies and ideas she’d love to try out one day. she’s also not averse to toys and porn; even if she tends to not watch a lot of porn, for various reasons.
(such as: various fundamental problems rooted in modern-day porn industry, like incessant violence, name-calling and really bad camera work.)
ABILITIES
✖ COMBAT SKILLS – excellent / good / moderate / poor / none
to be honest, she only knows Woman’s Self Defense 101: the heel-stomp, the deadly elbow, the nails.
oh, and she also knows how to stab people. and oz taught her to shoot.
✖ LITERACY SKILLS – excellent / good / moderate / poor / none
she has a master’s degree in english literature.
except we all know this doesn’t mean SHIT, since there are people with actual degrees claiming kylo ren is queer and femme coded out there, so: she’s actually damn good at reading and understanding things and picking up subtexts and nuanced aspects. her father was a college professor, remember? he was a good teacher, and she was a good student.
✖ ARTISTIC SKILLS – excellent / good / moderate / poor / none
she has, and i can’t emphasize this enough, negative artistic skills, both verbal and visual.
(”but she has a master’s degr-” have you ever read anyone’s master’s thesis? because i did.)
this is one of the core roots of her depressive thoughts also.
✖ TECHNICAL SKILLS – excellent / good / moderate / poor / none
give this girl a piece of paper and tell her to fold it in half and moments later the paper’s gonna be torn and on fire and she’s gonna be having a depressive meltdown.
she is... not very good at using her hands to make things happen. this is actually one of those few things her parents did wrong; they kind of overlooked this part of their kid’s development, and as a result - charlie is a clumsy mess.
and, by the gods, don’t give her a hammer. unless you really hate all of your kitchenware, that is.
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hello comrades
my name is grace. i'm gonna be honest right now, not sure exactly what this post is. just because i can't function without order, i'm gonna make a list of reasons why i'm sharing my story:
to spread awareness
because i need an outlet
many of my friends suggested i share this
simply to entertain whoever might take a look at it
just in case, because of my paranoia, i’m saying right now i don’t want any witch hunt. i feel like saying this is really reaching in terms of how many people are gonna read this, but my concern insists. this is gonna be a long article, so i’m putting the little “read more” thingamabob right here.
trigger warning, for like, everything
about me; prologue?
as you saw above, my name is grace. i’m 19, and this is a very personal experience that i’ve gone through. first, let me introduce everything that’s wrong with me. i have high-functioning autism, and throughout my life my autism has been the root of my downfall. ever since 2nd grade i’ve gotten the short end of the stick. you always hear about prodigy kids whose grades and social lives falter as the years pass, i am 100% one of them. this story isn’t necessarily about me, but i’ve been through some shit, son.
i have a family that is more supportive than i could ever ask for, i’m not gonna lie and say that my at-home life was miserable - because home was my safe place, and public school was where i fought my battles. i was a very eccentric kid and while my autism has limited me, it has also given me the ability to think outside of the box, blah blah blah so i’m grateful for it as well.
by the time i got to 6th grade, things went way more south than i thought they could go. i was a bit of an edgelord back then so i was skipping 4th period with my friend in the locker room. we’re dicking around, looking in lockers, climbing the stalls, being stupid kids. somewhere along the line we jump into the topic of sexuality, and she tells me she thinks she might be bi. i said that wouldn’t change anything about us, and that i might not like boys at all.
she told me about her parents not agreeing with the whole gay thing and she wasn’t even close to thinking of coming out of the closet because her parents would disown her. real fucked up, but it happened back then still quite frequently. i promised her i wouldn’t tell anybody and that i wouldn’t even think about outing her to anyone, and we gave each other a cute little friend hug, it was cute.
about 3 days later on the weekend, we’re texting and a small argument boils between us and another friend in a group chat. it starts to become a bigger argument, because kids are stupid and dramatic, and i definitely was. she ended up kicking me out of the group chat and i cried myself to sleep (i know lmao). i went to school on monday and i immediately get called into the principal’s office, regarding sexual assault claims. she lied and told the school faculty that i tried to touch her inappropriately during that time we skipped class in the locker room. she also got her friends to tell everybody.
long story short i became severely depressed, gained weight, got my head shoved in a toilet filled with piss by some 8th graders friends with that girl’s older sister, and started self-harming to suppress my urge to hurt other people. my meds got switched around (it’s why i gained weight) and i ended up switching schools because a public school had an IEP i think it was called? anyway
blah blah blah countless school stories and misfortunes blah blah blah crohn’s disease blah blah blah ambulance sent to the school all that jazz. it’s gonna hurt too much if i talk about PRLC, but basically there was a low-funded school for kids who wanted a second chance due to disability, drugs, ect. it was out at a wildlife preservation park with all sorts of animals, i met my best friends there, became the person i am today, ect. but staff changes ended up changing the school for the worse and eventually i got dismissed.
very long depression period, i got kicked out from the school i used to call a second home back in 2018 and this cycle hasn’t ended yet, to this day. i’m hoping writing this will give me some closure or something, because writing about my misfortunes online has sent me opportunities in the past. i am not a perfect person, i never have been, and i can still name many things about my psyche and outlook on life that i’d like to someday change.
the main course
this is where i start talking about somebody that i won’t mention by name, but i’ll call him music boy for convenience. in december of last year i got to see my favorite band live for the second time, the first being april of 2018. i love this band with all my heart, and i’m not going to mention them by name. but after the concert i was going through some heavy post-concert sadness, and i wanted to share my love and appreciation so i find a semi-active discord server dedicated to said band, and i join. i make some friends and acquaintances over a span of 2-3 months.
marijuana got legalized in my state this year, something i had been anticipating for a long time, ergo from january 2020 to the beginning of april 2020, i was in a constant state of stoned off my ass. nobody saw sober grace until the late days of april. i was not in any way able to make proper decisions regarding, say, a relationship. and it was really obvious that i was high, nobody would have thought otherwise.
after i get home from a birthday vacation to arizona on february 2nd, i start going in the voice chats for the server. i would say in the general chat something along the lines of “sick, i’m super baked i’m gonna go bother the voice chat” and i end up in a group chat consisting of most of the server members that are “of age” (so not too many). at this point i’m barely aware i’m making friends, but one person in the group i really happened to resonate with. her name is Christina, and she’s to this day my number 1 mom friend and goblin sibling. <3
i meet a handful of more people in the group chat (we called it the “after hours”) and we have a lot of fun doing different activities over discord. for example we all decided to sign up for club penguin online (which is now proven to be run by a predator, i believe) and we all battled each other in card-jitsu. or i would share my screen as i went on Omegle and did goofy high shit on there and met people under the “memes” or “weed” tags.
in this after hours group chat, one of the active members was music boy. he was the owner of the server dedicated to the band i love. why music boy? because he wants desperately to become a famous musician. there’s something about music boy that’s... ‘different’. i don’t know if anyone knows what i mean when i say, his energy was awry. the best way to describe music boy is kind of mean, but it’s the only way i’m able to express how this guy is as a person. i can best describe him by saying he expects his life to play out as a WattPad fanfiction, him being the main character.
just so you get the main point, this one time i was on Omegle dicking around ha ha funny random people, but music boy was silent. he then typed in the chat that he was gonna go on Omegle himself and do something painfully unfunny, he said he was gonna get his guitar and use that as a prop to “vibe check” people on the website. it wasn’t funny but everybody (me included) was sort of brainwashed into thinking he could do no wrong. don’t know how he got me to laugh at that, especially with his delivery of the joke.
yet, he didn’t want to “vibe check” people, i know that now - he just couldn’t stand when he wasn’t the center of attention. so he left and told a mod, who was also in the group chat, to join the server voice chat with him. and he announced that he was streaming himself vibe checking people on Omegle. the iffy part about that is that the entire reason he made the after hours chat was to keep NSFW stuff off the server, and it was basically prompted by me streaming myself messing around on Omegle and seeing a lot of (pretty expected) male genitalia. i’m not gonna explain that any further because anybody with a brain can understand why that was a confusing move on his part.
eventually february 14th came by, and i, being as high as i was, decided to send music boy a bunch of goofy valentine’s day cards, like the ones that were popular in 2013. i kept sending them because at the time i thought it was so funny, and i’m a natural flirt when i’m stoned. keep in mind everybody knew they hadn’t seen me sober yet, the joke in the server was basically 'when is grace not high?’ so it was evident that my decision-making process was impaired.
for some reason music boy wanted us to all play DnD, even though half of us didn’t know or give a rat’s ass how to play. i would make stupid jokes, and everybody would laugh, but music boy would exaggerate, he would go ‘oh thats how it is? is that how this is going to be’ or some unfunny shit like that because he thought every single joke or reference that anyone made had something to do with him, because, you know, he is the main character, after all. he eventually made a really embarrassing big deal about him ‘accepting my valentine proposal’ and then he went to bed i guess.
the next day or two is a blur to me, all i remember and know is that Christina knew that he was taking advantage of me always being super high, but she didn’t want to assume anything. like she had always seen me make a joke and then would see music boy turn that joke sexual, even when it was nearly impossible to make a suggestive joke out of what i originally joked about, which to be honest was probably my flawless Sméagol impression. but he would repeat the Gollum voice and say something unfunny that we all laughed at.
basically, if you haven’t caught on, music boy is a major egotistical narcissist that cannot stand having somebody that isn’t him being paid attention to. he told me his “dream” (that's TOTALLY gonna come true, by the way) was to go to a concert of the band the server was dedicated to, but he would show up in a custom made shirt that said “[lead singer of band] IS A THOT” and then the band’s guitarist would point it out and laugh because it’s SO funny and then get the lead singer’s attention, who would pull music boy on stage and challenge him to pehen he would start serenading the crowd and all the girls’ panties would instantly get soaked, all the tabloids would hear about it, and the band would jizz their pants, and he would become an overnight sensation.
here’s where stuff gets dodgy. i’m not claiming this is abuse, because i don’t have experience with abusive relationships, and i’m not in any place to assume that i understand what it’s like to be in one, but my friends have told me that he mentally abused me and took advantage of the state i was in. somewhere along the line he would, in the group call, tell his sob story about how all his friends ghosted him and tried to cancel him because of some sort of misconduct accusation in a previous server, and how i was his savior for putting my trust in him and believing his side of the story and he said some things about becoming a happier person because he met me, and it was all very unnecessarily dramatic and extremely manipulative disregarding if he noticed he was doing it or not.
I.E.
“and... then I met this girl... this really weird girl! then i saw her face, and i thought i loved her, but i found out she only liked girls and i lost all hope but then out of nowhere she sends me valentines cards! and now shes my valentine”
or some really really stupid gay shit like that, it’s the best i can imitate him without gagging or getting sick. then eventually (eventually being equal to ‘within the first week of meeting me’) he hEsiTaNtLy asks me to, like, idk be his e-girlfriend. he knew i was baked to oblivion and wasn’t in a proper state to make up my mind on anything serious but then again am i the main character?
no.
music boy is the main character.
if i’m being gut-wrenchingly honest here, i only genuinely liked the idea of being in an e-relationship with music boy for a day or a day and a half. the entire time i was just stoned out of my mind and not thinking as i normally do, i was nonchalant until april fools day when all hell broke loose in the server. on a live stream, the lead singer of the band made a suggestion that he was in the server that music boy made. and dear God, you would have thought it was the second coming of Christ by the way music boy reacted to it.
he was being unbelievably hyper, even for someone with ADHD. he was hauling his uncanny-valley looking forcibly ripped body around his room like a genetically mutated spider monkey, banging his head against his bed, stopping mid-sentence to play a quirky chord on his handy dandy acoustic guitar while he looked in the webcam and made a quirky blank face. it was like watching a six y/o meet Iron Man, even though there was nothing really to be too elated about.
he made an emoji for it and everything, he even posted on the “Official [band name] Discord Server”’s instagram account, but it was just a video of him, and the thumbnail was his goofy ass face, the whole video was just music boy saying unfunny shit trying to lowkey promote the server while flexing at the same time, something like [lead singer] we know you’re here!! you are welcome here my lord idk lmfaooo
but at this point i was becoming too sober to stand by silently and watch this moron suck his own toes, i wasn’t gonna act like his music was good and i wasn’t gonna act like he was gonna become a superstar without question. the breaking point was mostly when he almost came his pants and cried when the lead singer allegedly joined his server, but i came close to breaking when i started casually humming in the group call and hes like
Hold Up 👁️👄👁️ wait you’re so good... why are you so good? you’re like really good and i mean it!! you’re like, almost as good as me! but you know i have YEARS of practice you know haha but you’re like super good!
and then I decided to humor myself by showing him a cover i recorded and the first thing he said after listening to it halfway was “this scares me”, so that was a pretty big warning sign.
blah blah blah i cried for an hour after that then called him again just to break up with him because of my own mental health and he did handle this very well, not bashing him for that. i basically told him no we aren’t taking a break this shindig will no longer continue, like at all, ever and hes like okay cool yknow it hurts but ill get over it, and i really didnt expect that. because, he basically implied that if i left him he would k*ll himself.
i tried to keep the friendship going because i dont like abandoning people, but he slowly started getting distant from me, and the entire server kind of distanced themselves from me too, but at the time i only noticed music boy getting apprehensive with me. keep in mind (i keep saying that, don’t i?) i thought everybody in the server was cool with me making offensive-ish jokes because they had no problem with it during the time i was “with” music boy. then one day i get called out for talking about - i’m not joking - weed. i started ranting about how weed is my medicine and it was kinda silly to get so pissy over the devil’s lettuce but i dont think i made too big of a deal out of what i could have made.
couple days later im talking in the server again. i’m a very blunt person, my humor is very dry and it can tend to go over some people’s heads if they don’t have enough brain cells. i made a joke that i’d already made in the server before about me being r-word because autism and haha funny joke.
i get kicked out of the server.
at the time i was confused because i had no idea that i even said anything wrong. i messaged music boy a bit passive-aggressively because despite my confusion i still had a vague idea of what was happening. i said something like "was i too edgy" and like 3 minutes later he responds "you were making a lot of dudes uncomfortable”
mcscuse me bietch?
NOBODYYYYY in the general chat had told me that i was making them feel uncomfy whatsoever, and i dont think anything could have implied that anyone was in any way uncomfortable, and with these social situations i’ve explained to everyone in the after hours chat that sometimes i don’t get social cues. i’m autistic!!! it’s a very rare occurrence when i’m able to ‘read the room’. i thought they knew that but they decided to have a private staff meeting and they all agreed it was best to BAN ME from the server.
the thing is if i had been messaged, if i was let known that people were bitching about me calling myself r******d then i would have definitely complied. i can understand people feeling a bit weird when i make fun of myself using no-no words, and i’m definitely willing to stop saying a certain thing if it genuinely makes somebody feel uneasy. but nobody said anything about it to me. not a single word.
considering the server has gone to a snowflake kingdom since my exit, i’m not too upset about being kicked out. what i am upset about regards him knowing i wasn’t in a proper state to make any decisions. decisions including NSFW decisions that he hinted at for about 5 minutes before i stopped saying ‘ehhh i don’t know if i’m comfortable with this’ and he didn’t have to beg for coochie anymore. i’m honestly lucky because i can’t remember most of what he coaxed me to do, because if i think about it too much it gets traumatic and i start feeling nauseous.
Christina has been in the server just to tell me what new bullshit has been going on in the rules, and the ever-expanding list of things that you aren’t allowed to talk about in the server, we have a good chuckle at it. i got high again about a week ago, and told my friends the audacity of what music boy actually had done to me and we all agreed to go under a vpn and raid the server, because why not, its funny haha goofy joke. we were having the best time and i was about to piss myself laughing when one of my friends name-drops me and the whoooole gig is over. we get kicked out and Christina pretends to act like she had no clue what was going on, so she could stay in and screenshot this:
she didn’t know how badly that term in itself would send me down a long overdue psychotic episode because about a year or two ago, i was getting concerned that i might have anti-social personality disorder, the ‘proper’ term for a diagnosed psychopath. it ended up nonconclusive, so i don’t necessarily believe i have it, but for some reason him calling me that word really fucked me up. but here’s a pretty funny and cringy sequence of things he typed in to get his cult of teenagers to feel bad for him.
don’t go looking for this person, don’t go looking for the band, i’m just sharing my story because maybe somebody could benefit from my experience being told. i’m trying to jump over this long ass hurdle that’s kept me in one place for wayyy too long, i’m hoping that sharing this endeavor could help my psyche, and perhaps push me forward and lead me towards gathering up the courage i’m missing to finally study for and take the GED test, graduate, and put public school and it’s challenges behind me.
if you read this long and want to talk to me about it, by all means, ask questions, make jokes, ask for more goofy ass screenshots of how i’ve made fun of him, more drama queen music boy tales, because we have a handful, trust me.
i don’t expect anyone to read this or necessarily care about this, but if you’ve come this far, from the bottom of my heart, do not date a musician. and, of course, thank you for reading. but still, don’t date a musician. especially if it’s a man. mega especially x2 if you’ve only known them for less than a week.
add me on roblox i’m user xulue i’m a funny gal and im a pro gamer
stay safe out there, be kind, and for the love of God don’t bring your guitar to the voice channel <3
#xulue#tw: manipulation#tw: self harm#tw: drugs#tw: slurs#narcissist#npd#mental manipulation#mine#taken advantage of#autism#impaired judgement#my ex#discord#discord server#personal
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(Ask) What is your real opinion of how Seunghyun has been acting like lately? I was hoping he would act more mature after he finished his service, but he almost seems more childish now in his antics and actions. He also seems to be playing hide and seek with his new girlfriend (Kim Gabin) very publicly. The clues are obvious and everywhere and is disappointing coming from a 30+ year old man.
I’m so upset...I literally wrote a ton trying to answer this and it was perfect. I attempted to make the text smaller since I had more than 3 paragraphs and LOST all that I said.
I don’t have the energy left in me to re-type it so here are some cliff notes on what I think (note: it may come off rude or problematic cause I’m not offering explanations behind it. Please send another ask, asking me to elaborate and I will*)
CLIFFS:
- TOP has an un-diagnosed mental illness and emotional issues he never received counseling on. He has not recovered from the scandals emotionally.
TOP (take it with a grain of salt) has autism spectrum / aspergers. His behavior and mentality is largely due to this.
I pray for TOP to overcome but what he is doing is too similar to Hara, Sulli and he may end up like Jonghyun. I would not be surprised if this happened.
TOP’s parent as well as other BB moms will start looking after the guys more and monitor online trolls to make sure they don’t mess with the boys anymore.
I believe TOP should start learning conversational English (which I know he will attempt to learn in the future, but he needs to speed it up) leave these white bi / semi gay men alone, move overseas, get mental and emotional help and stay off social media.
Korea has beaten him down but he must take responsibility for the fact he played his part in all of this.
My real opinion is I’m over it. My heart isn’t in TOP anymore and I don’t expect anything of him, I am no longer invested. I wish him well and I want him to do well. I believe it’s a combination of so many things and he never stood a chance.
TOP was semi right about “evil” people. Industry is fucked up like I’ve been trying to tell you all from the start. But contrary to that, TOP is showing his mental age by pointing fingers and saying bad guy. He 89% made things the way they are and he does not realize that. He seems to lack self awareness in my opinion, I saw on All kpop people commenting, 1 comment in the bunch said something like: he saying things as if he has no idea of the consequences and reaction his words will bring. Either he lacking some self awareness and or is just hurt, speaking solely from is own POV . Either way it’s not healthy.
There are gong yoos and kim woo bin’s of the world, and then there are TOPs. If TOP humbles himself, stops drinking, and gets out of his toxic bubble he can find happiness like Woo bin. I mention woobin cause dude battled terminal illness but isn’t a dark cloud like TOP at the moment. TOP has his physical health and all the freedom, he needs to learn he is not a victim of the public, but he is a service to the public. Had TOP kept that bright side of his personality he had as Bingu TOP back in the day, Koreans wouldn’t rag this hard. He makes it hard for himself and it comes off as emo pretentious try hard. For instance, Minus Taeyang, had he not tried to be too cool for school and reject learning english back in the day, he’d know as much English as Taeyang by now and would be solid on doing what he needs to do. But that will take longer cause he felt he would never need it. I’m kind of irritated over the fact he performing at Coachella yet all of BB had the mentality that they were above working in the states. I give black pink a pass cause they are still new.
this all my objective opinion minus the aspergers / austim thing which is a fact.
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For the headcanon meme: Matt and/or Foggy, your favorite questions
I picked five!
6. Eating habits and sample daily menu: Because I LOVE FOOD, and thinking about what characters eat and how.
Matt: It varies, because he has a few different things going on: a meat ‘n’ potatoes background (single Irish boxer dads are not known for their culinary prowess and Stick’s ascetic teachings telling him that food isn’t important and he should only be thinking of it as fuel; his own tendency towards self-deprivation; extreme sensitivity but also extreme ability to enjoy food; and a life that burns a lot of calories. So I think at the very least he’s good at ensuring he gets protein into himself, but during bad mental health periods it’s mainly forcing himself to down low-flavor high-nutrition calorie bombs on a semi-regular basis (boiled unsalted chicken and kale! oatmeal with peanut butter and nothing else!). When he’s got more equilibrium I think he does like to cook because he’s understandably very precise about the flavor and provenance of what he eats. And of course Foggy is responsible for probably 20-50% of Matt’s meals at any given time.
Foggy: Foggy takes real joy in food, which to him is deeply communal. The Nelsons having a butcher shop is a little bit of a retcon but it really strengthens the feeling I always had that Foggy sees food as a safe and welcoming place where relationships are nurtured. He loves junky food, but really he just likes everything, regardless of “healthiness” or cuisine - and not just to eat it, but to discover it, share it, connect over it, which is why the staff of every restaurant in Hell’s Kitchen knows him by name. Ironically he’s not a great cook, but he’s very good at providing food for people, which is why he’s always showing up with snacks or ordering takeout to get Matt to eat when he’s having a rough week.
13. Sexual Orientation? And, regardless of own orientation, thoughts on sexual orientation in general?
Matt: Bi, but unlikely to use the word. While Matt spends a lot of time agonizing over his own ethics, he is otherwise not particularly self-aware or introspective, so I don’t think he’s really spent a lot of time pondering his own sexuality. I think that would be the case even if he’s slept with men. (I headcanon him both ways depending on the fic.) Part of me thinks he’s inclined to repress his attraction to men, but less out of internalized homophobia, Catholicism-driven or otherwise, than because he kneejerk represses anything that might make him happy. (Re: other people, he believes firmly that everyone should love whoever they want, but having grown up in a make-believe Catholic orphanage, he has no idea how to express this casually so falls back on lawyer-approved Politically Correct language in an endearingly awkward way.)
Foggy: Openly bi. Has had a vague sense that he liked boys too since middle school, out since late high school. Believes in love and bagels and the beautiful city of New York, according to his future second run at district attorney. ;)
17. Preferred mode of dress and rituals surrounding dress:
Matt: Wants a lot of gray suits and white shirts that can’t clash. I once read something from the show’s costume designer where she said she went with interestingly-textured fabric for Matt’s otherwise very bland suits, which I think is fascinating. Another thing I’ve noticed is that his suits have a very slimming cut, which I think is another deliberate choice on his part to hide his muscles. Mostly Matt wants to look put-together but fade into the background, both because he doesn’t want to be gawked at because of his blindness and because it helps with the secret ID. (For leisure clothing, his only criteria are “soft and ideally smells like a loved one.”) Ritual-wise, we’ve seen the Braille tags and the glasses; I think it’s really just about routine for him. Everything needs to be in the same place every day, otherwise things just devolve into chaos.
Foggy: Talks a big game, but actually has a lot of insecurities about his appearance which he handles exactly opposite from how Matt does: where Matt dresses to blend in, Foggy dresses to say “Yes, I am here, I have chosen to look the way I do, I love myself and my pink shirts.” From the early long hair and goofy ties to the later three-piece suits, everything he puts on is a deliberate choice and announces itself as such. No one will ever accuse him of being sloppy or lazy re: his appearance. He is dressing with confidence to make the confidence manifest, and it works. Ritual-wise, he spends an hour on his hair every morning, even when it’s short, and has a huge range of expensive shaving and hair and skin care products that make him look and feel lustrous but don’t bother Matt’s nose; he also always wears the tie clip Matt gave him for graduation and it’s one of his most prized possessions.
37. Are they more analytical or more emotional in their decision-making?
Matt is pure emotion but thinks he’s very analytical. Foggy is very analytical but thinks he’s emotional.
41. How misanthropic are they?
Not at all! Foggy complains but actually loves everyone except jerks and scary killers, and as we’ve seen with Frank is willing to work with the latter. Matt thinks he’s very cynical but really he truly believes that everyone can be reached and redeemed and is constantly hurling himself into danger to save his fellow human. He’s introverted and gets overstimulated, sure, but that’s not the same as hating people. He would just like them to be not in his apartment ever. ;)
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Wherever the Winds Take You: Chapter 2
Author’s note:
Hey hey hey you beautiful people. Second chapter within the same month as the first, that’s a surprise.
So just so you all know, as per usual I’m super busy (school, work, extra-curriculars, social life, getting a semi-decent amount of sleep) however, as I’ve recently been loving this motivation train for writing this fic, I’m going to TRY to put a chapter out every 2 weeks. I would prefer to do more, but I only have a couple hours a day and I want to not only make each of these chapters good quality, but I also want to make them fairly long and I’m trying to edit them! So yea, bi-weekly seems like the best course of action.
Anyways, enough with me. Thank you for reading WTWTY chapter 2, I hope you enjoy.
Disclaimer: I own nothing except my OC, Young Justice and it’s places, stories, and characters all belong to DC Comics and the brilliant minds who created them.
Paris, France
April 16, 2008
2:46 CEST
The hospital was just like any other; blank white walls, the smell of disinfectant, the faint beeping of a heart monitor in the distance. Signs written in French were everywhere; showing directions, giving your regular everyday health registrations, maybe the occasional motivational poster. There was one area of the hospital however, that wasn't your typical everyday sight.
Standing by a window, looking in but trying to be stealthy about it, stood three adults. One, a dark-cloaked man whose cowl showed off two points shaped like bat-ears. Second, a woman with blonde hair wearing a leather jacket, a corset, and a pair of fishnet tights. Third, a male-humanoid robot with a bright red exterior, blue and gold cape, and a gold 'T’ shape on his chest. Had it not been nighttime, the three adults knew it wouldn't be safe for them where they were. But as it was nearly three in the morning, there was no danger for them in the hospital.
In the window in which they peeked, there was a young girl. Pale with freckles dusting her nose, big blue eyes, round cheeks, and long, light brown hair that fell in a messy, wavy, mess over her shoulders. She was awake, but extremely still. The only sign that she was even alive was the fact that she was sitting up on her own, her legs pulled up to her chest, and the tears that rolled down her cheeks. With her sat an older man in his mid-forties with greying brown hair, who sat in the chair beside the bed with his hand on the girl's back and a look of pained empathy on his face. There were also two boys, one older, and one younger than the girl.
The younger sat on the foot of the girl's bed, tears of his own flowing down as his hand lay on the girl's leg; and the older held a frown on his face as he leaned against the wall opposite the door, far away from the rest of the people.
“Are you sure this is the best time to do this?” The woman of the trio of adults asked. “She only just woke up and got the news.”
“The sooner we do, the better.” The cloaked man replied.
“She’s been through so much in just a few hours though.” The woman reasoned. “We could scare her off, or overwhelm her.”
“The emotions she feels now for what she's done are a good motivator to learn how to avoid it in the future. And the girl is on the spectrum, I have no doubt she's used to being overwhelmed.” The man in black countered.
Frustrated, the woman let out a deep sigh and rolled her eyes. She knew she ought to have been used to her co-worker’s coldness by now, but it still amazed her at times like this.
“What's your say Red?” The blonde asked, looking up at her robotic comrade. “This is all your call, not to mention your idea.”
The robot was silent for a moment, as if lost in thought, but then replied.
“Batman is correct.” The red robot answered. “Raw emotions act as human's main motivators, it would be the most logical conclusion to ask now while the events of today are fresh. However, it would be foolish to go in without any thought to her emotional state. We should act thoughtfully and with care.”
“Leave it to you two to act like this is some sort of battle plan.” The woman muttered under her breath, but then brushed some hair out of her face before walking towards the door, leading the trio into the room. The moment the three heroes walked into the hospital room, every single one of its inhabitants looked up at them.
“Madam Canary, Monsieurs Batman and…” The older man in the room greeted, addressing the heroes but falling short on the name of the robotic individual he did not know.
“So you’ve finally decided to stop creepily watching from outside like stalkers?” The oldest of the children asked, his shoulders being pushed back to appear bigger.
The two men's French accents were thick, but their English was still clear.
“Calvin, watch your manners.” The oldest of the family stated strictly to the boy before standing and addressing the three strangers. “I apologize for my son, he can be quite protective.”
“It’s no problem, Monsieur Leduc, we understand completely.” The blonde woman, Canary, said. “We...understand that this can’t be an easy time for any of you.”
“Markus is fine, Mademoiselle Canary.” The greying man said with a small smile. “And please don’t worry about us, we just appreciate the help you three have shown in this...incident.”
“Why are you still here?” The youngest of the boys asked, sitting so his body shielded the girl’s. “She’s awake and physically well, she hasn’t started another storm since she awoke.”
“Are you going to arrest her for something she had no control over?” The older boy asked. The girl’s body curled in tighter around itself. “If you try to take her away from us, you should know our lawyer’s on his way.”
“We’re not taking her away. But I’m glad you brought up control.” Canary explained, she turned to motion to her robotic coworker. “This is Red Tornado, another member of the Justice League.
I don’t believe any of you got the chance to officially meet during the debacle.”
“You’re...the one that flew with a tornado around your waist.” The girl spoke quietly. “You helped return the winds back to their normal paths after…” her voice fell away.
“Not a very creative name.” The oldest boy remarked.
“My name was given to me by my creator.” Red Tornado explained, before facing the small girl.
“But yes, I hold the ability to control the air around me. Much like yourself.”
“Except I can’t control the Winds.” The girl said, frowning. “They controlled me. I created a level 3 tornado while I was in a coma, completely unaware. Or at least...that’s what everyone keeps telling me.”
“For now you may have no control over your abilities, but that’s why we’re here.” Canary said.
“Red Tornado, and the rest of us, have discussed the possibility of him taking Evangelina on as a protege.” The cloaked man, Batman, said bluntly.
“Protege?” The girl and her father asked in surprise.
“I would be willing to...take her under my wing, in a sense. I could teach her how to use her new-found abilities, train her to control and use them, make sure an accident of this nature doesn’t happen again.” Red Tornado explained.
“And I would be happy to help with the emotional aspect.” Black Canary added. “Powers are often strongly connected to emotions and mental states, and as my colleague...has some lack of experience with that aspect, it would be my pleasure to use my psychological background to assist in and way.”
“So you’d be brainwashing her into becoming another one of your ‘sidekicks’ like we see on the news? Put her in danger and make her fight your battles for you? She’s only 14!” The eldest brother protested, taking a step towards the heroes.
“Calvin.” Lina called, her voice quiet in nature but it cut through the room like a dagger. Her eyes were so full of confusion and grief that just by looking at them, her family automatically were flooded with a sense of guilt and empathy. It was probably because of this that the three men let the young girl speak out.
As she turned to the heroes, she scanned all three of them carefully. As if looking for something, but nobody knew for what.
“If I were to become your protege,” Lina started, “I would gain control over....all of this, right?
I wouldn’t ever...do that again?”
Canary saw her cloaked colleague shoot her a sly look and she felt a strong wave of annoyance at the man.
“That is the idea.” Red Tornado replied.
“From your report, you have a very different type of connection to, the Winds, as you called it.
But we’d certainly work on ensuring that you don’t lose control again.” Lina watched the robotic man carefully.
“You mean you’ll try to make sure I don’t end up creating a major natural disaster and end up causing hundreds of dollars in property damage, endangering the lives in the area, again.” Lina spoke with a strict tone, full of self-loathing.
“That is the idea.” Red Tornado repeated.
“You all should know that you won’t have to worry about the property damage.” Batman said, speaking for the first time since entering the room. “Wayne Enterprises has offered to take care of it.”
“The American company? Why?” Leo asked, frowning.
He never got a response.
“You should know, before we even consider this in any way-” Markus spoke up, “-my daughter, she...has some special needs…”
“Papa!” Lina’s head whipped around, her face growing pink.
“We’re already aware of your...learning disability.” Canary informed Lina, stepping closer to her.
At the term ‘disability’, the younger woman tensed and fidgeted with a strand of her hair. “But, fortunately, Wayne Enterprises has come through again.”
“What do you mean? Came through how?” Lina asked.
“Wayne Enterprises has been testing a new product in their health and medicine division.
It’s a type of autism medication that works to completely inhibit all symptoms and conditions for a few hours. It’s experimental, but completely tested and 100% safe.” Canary explained.
“You’ll have to talk about it with your doctors before you are even handed a dosage, and we don’t suggest using it until you’re well enough, but after you've gotten the 'okay’ you're going to have to speak with the head scientist about any side effects and limitations, but-””So not only are you trying to brainwash her into becoming one of your...child lackies, but you’re putting experimental chemicals filled with God knows what into her body?”
Calvin’s interjection was full of hostility as he stepped closer to the trio of heroes.
“We understand your concern, but we assure you-””Oh don’t give me that formal, robotic, bullsh-”
“I’ll do it.”
The whole room froze as, once again, Lina’s voice cut through the noise. She was looking at the heroes, her eyes dancing between Black Canary and the robot.
“You’ll...what?” Calvin guffawed.
Lina looked up, making direct eye contact. “You say you’ll teach me to control my...powers so this will never happen again? I’ll do it.” Lina explained. “I’m not too sure about this medicine, but I’ll consider it once I get an unbiased medical professional's opinion on it. But if you seriously think that you can teach me to control the Winds, well, I don’t really see a good alternative.”
“Lina, mon chou-”“It's my decision.” Lina said strictly, the pain in her eyes morphing into determination. Once a moment had passed, Markus sat back down.
After a quick beat, Red Tornado walked up over to Lina’s bed. Looking up at him, the French girl came to realize just how much bigger he was in comparison to herself. But then, the robot extended his hand. Smiling slightly, Lina took it and shook it firmly.
“I believe the proper statement to make here is 'Welcome aboard’.” Red Tornado said, and Lina could have sworn she heard a happy tone in his robotic voice.
Gotham City
April 16, 2008
16:00 EST
As Bruce Wayne sat at his desk, the desk that practically ruled over Gotham City, he let his mind wander. This was not an unusual occurrence for him, for either of his personas. Anyone who knew either the man in the suit, or the man in the cowl, knew that if Bruce Wayne ever got a far away look in his eye then he was already on a whole other planet. This however, didn't seem to stop the twelve year old boy in his office from chatting on in front of him.
“And then, ooh, and then the best part happens. The guy comes at me, all ‘oh you darn brat I'm going to kill you’ and firing at will, but he completely missed me! Stormtrooper-level missed me!
So once the guy's out of bullets, which takes like five seconds by the way, I-” the boy lets out a sound effect as he backflip-kicks and then lands perfectly back into a crouching position, “-the gun out of his hand and then-”he does another flip, this time going forwards, and then does a low spin-kick, “-knock him off his feet, just like you told me Bruce! Oh my god the face me made when he fell!”
The raven-haired boy looked over at the older man behind the desk, only to notice the far away look in his eyes and the slight frown on his face. The enthusiasm in the young boy leaks out as he realizes he's been talking to himself the whole time, before he stands up straight and fixes the tie of his school uniform.
“So...how'd that mission you went on last night go?” The boy asks, slowly stepping closer to Bruce. The man finally manages to snap out of his trance and focuses in on the twelve year old. “Freak tornado in Paris, right? You were out pretty late because of it.”
“Yes.” Bruce hums. “It went fine.”
After a long moment of silence, the boy's shoulders slag down as he realizes he's not going to get much more out of his guardian.
“I...think I'm going to go down to the cafeteria and get a snack, do you want anything?” The raven-haired boy asks as he begins to take a step towards the office door.
“Coffee please, black.” Bruce grunts.
“Black.” The boy chuckles. “What a surprise.” But just as he's about to leave through the door, it swings open. A tall man with slicked-back hair and a white lab coat steps in, carrying a small metal box with the famous 'W’ Wayne Enterprises insignia engraved on it.
“Oh, so sorry Mr. Grayson.” The man said, quickly standing to the side.
“No problem.” The boy shrugs, and motions for the man to pass him. The man nods and does so.
“Doctor Leon.” Bruce greets, standing up and walking around the desk. “I'm assuming this is the package I asked for?”
“Yes sir.” The doctor replied. “14 perfected doses of the newest updated serum.”
“Good, thank you very much.” Bruce replied, and lifted the lid off the box to reveal its content.
The syringes were small, sized for convenience, and full of a translucent blue liquid. As the boy strolled over, he looked high to take a peek at the box's contents. Bruce allowed this for only a moment before closing the box again.
“And you're sure this batch was the one that successfully went through human trials?” Bruce asked.
“Absolutely sir.” Leon nodded. “We just ran the last tests late last night so everything was already out and ready to be copied. Every single trial has proved to be a success thus far, which is why it was marked to be put on the market this time next year.”
“Yes…” Bruce hummed, looking down at the box. The far away look returned again, but this time only for a moment.
“Well, thank you again Doctor.”
“Not a problem at all Mr. Wayne.” Leon nodded, and then turned to walk out. “Have a good evening sir, Mr. Grayson.”
The moment the door shut behind Leon, the twelve year old sighed. “Being called 'Mr. Grayson’ is so...weird. I kind of wish people would just call me Dick, or even Richard.” The boy quickly turned his attention back to the box in Bruce's hands. “So, what's that? Who's it for?”
“Medical Treatment Serum 219, strand 9.4, version 8.” Bruce grunted. It only took Dick a moment before it clicked.
“The new autism inhibiting meds?” Dick asked, raising an eyebrow. “Why do you need 14 doses of it?”
“It's not for me.” Bruce replied, placing the box on his desk. “And no, I'm not saying who it is for.
You'll meet them soon enough.”
Dick's eyes lit up and grew twice their size.
“I'll meet them soon enough? Oh come on! Now you have to tell me!”
#young justice#young justice fanfiction#fanfiction#oc fanfiction#young justice oc#original character#aqualad x oc#aqualad#kaldur’ahm#kaldur#miss martian#megan morse#mgann morzz#artemis#artemis crock#tigress#kid flash#wally west#conner kent#superboy#robin#nightwing#dick grayson#red tornado#john smith#dc comics#dc fanfic#dc fanfiction
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@snw-cnvs
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<div id="bar"><i>muses</i></div>
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<div class="tab">
<input type="radio" id="tab-1" name="tab-group-1" checked>
<label for="tab-1">LUKE</label>
<div class="content">
<center><h2><i> —*&; Luke </i></h2></center>
<center><h3><i> active // shipping status: 1/3</i></h3></center><br>
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/rcabdng.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0; margin-left:30px;">
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/ZLFn3q1.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0;"><br>
<h2><i>—*&; General Information</i></h2><br>
<b>—NAME.</b> Luke <br>
<b>—NICKNAME/S.</b> Lou, Lulu <br>
<b>—DOB.</b> 18th may (20 yrs old) <br>
<b>—GENDER.</b> male <br>
<b>—ORIENTATION.</b> bi-curious <br>
<b>—ETHNICITY.</i> Adopted; unknown <br>
<b>—SPOKEN LANGUES.</b> english, spanish, japanese. <br>
<b>—OCCUPATION.</b> studying // part time mechanic. <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Appearance & Personality</i></h2><br>
<b>—HAIR COLOUR.</b> Black <br>
<b>—EYE COLOUR</b> Blue <br>
<b>—HEIGHT</b> 185cm 6'1 <br>
<b>—BODY BUILD.</b> Fit well toned <br>
<b>—TATTOOS + PIERCINGS.</b> none <br>
<b>—INTELLIGENCE.</b> high <br>
<b>—LIKES.</b> drinking, dogs, problem solving <br>
<b>—DISLIKES.</b> bullies, obnoxious people <br>
<b>—PHOBIAS.</b>n/a <br>
<b>—DISPOSITION.</b> Sarcasm. So much sarcasm. Usually he's pretty reserved and polite, gives the impression he was raised well. But the more you get to know him the more he'll loosen up. He's pretty kind and selfless, but because of his big size and typically nuetral expression he gets roped into fights a lot.<br>
<h2><i>—*&; Bio</i></h2><br>
Luke was adopted by a loving family when he was 6 months old. He’d pretty much always known he wads adopted as his parents looked different to him. But he knew they loved him and never had an issue with it. <br><br>
Although his family was loving, he was put under a lot of pressure. They lived in a small town where everyone knew everyone and you couldn’t get away with anything. His parents were very religious and a little bigoted, which didn’t sit well with him but he never spoke out against them. He was expected to get good grades and behave himself. Which he did. He was always putting pressure on himself to be a good son, feeling like he owed it to his parents for choosing him. He was never top of the class or outstanding in any particular field, but he was always up there. <br><br>
As much as Luke loves his parents, when he turned 18 and it was time to start his next phase of life, he moved away, far away to study. He works part time as a mechanic, having learnt the skills from his father, and studies the rest of the time.
<br><br>
MORE TBA
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<label for="tab-2">ANDREW</label>
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<center><h2><i> —*&; ANDREW </i></h2></center>
<center><h3><i> active // shipping status: 1/2 </i></h3></center><br>
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/uKtLeI0.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0; margin-left:30px;">
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/FvioeVW.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0;"><br>
<h2><i>—*&; General Information</i></h2><br>
<b>—NAME.</b> Andrew Svensson <br>
<b>—NICKNAME/S.</b> Andy, Drew<br>
<b>—DOB.</b> 19 years old <br>
<b>—GENDER.</b> male <br>
<b>—ORIENTATION.</b> (closeted) homosexual <br>
<b>—ETHNICITY.</i>English // Swedish // Spanish <br>
<b>—SPOKEN LANGUES.</b>English // Swedish // Japenese (adequately) // Spanish (somewhat) <br>
<b>—OCCUPATION.</b> bass player in a band // convenience store // cafe <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Appearance & Personality</i></h2><br>
<b>—HAIR COLOUR.</b>blonde. <br>
<b>—EYE COLOUR</b>green <br>
<b>—HEIGHT</b> 167cm. <br>
<b>—BODY BUILD.</b>He's in shape, goes for runs to exercize, but is still a little on the lanky side. <br>
<b>—TATTOOS + PIERCINGS.</b>N/A <br>
<b>—INTELLIGENCE.</b>high <br>
<b>—LIKES.</b>Music, coffee, books, quiet peaceful places, cats <br>
<b>—DISLIKES.</b> Bullies/rude people, big dogs <br>
<b>—PHOBIAS.</b>n/a <br>
<b>—DISPOSITION.</b>He's SUPER socially awkward, he doesn't really get sarcasm most of the time and takes things at face value. He struggles make friends. He's typically very honest, to the point of being blunt and sometimes unintentionally rude. Doesn't mean any harm deep down though. Just a bit of an awkward guy. <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Bio</i></h2><br>
When Andrew was 6 years old his mother left him and his father. Andrew was of course sad because of this, but at the time was too young to properly realize what had happened. A few years later when he was 9 his father remarried. Then a year later, 10, his step-mother gave birth to his little sister and brother, twins. <br><br>
Andrew is welcome at his home, his step-mother has always treated him well, but when he turned 18 he chose to move out. His parents worked a lot, and even when they weren’t he was expected to take care of the twins a lot. His father works as a high up in a pretty well off company, and he expects good things from Andrew. So he always felt a bit pressured when it came to grades and the like. Andrew’s family is also very religious, because of this he never felt comfortable coming out to anyone, not even himself fully. All of these reason encouraged him to leave. He loves his family, but he needed some space and freedom.
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<div class="tab">
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<label for="tab-3">LEVI</label>
<div class="content">
<center><h2><i> —*&; Levi </i></h2></center>
<center><h3><i> semi-active // shipping status: closed </i></h3></center><br>
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/b004Pto.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0; margin-left:30px;">
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/22VlJI6.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0;"><br>
<h2><i>—*&; General Information</i></h2><br>
<b>—NAME.</b> Levi Fay <br>
<b>—NICKNAME/S.</b> Levy, Lev<br>
<b>—DOB.</b> 15th August (20 years old) <br>
<b>—GENDER.</b> male <br>
<b>—ORIENTATION.</b> Pansexual/romantic <br>
<b>—ETHNICITY.</i>Demigod - half greek (god) // half american/english <br>
<b>—SPOKEN LANGUES.</b>english, french <br>
<b>—OCCUPATION.</b> studying <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Appearance & Personality</i></h2><br>
<b>—HAIR COLOUR.</b> Sandy blonde <br>
<b>—EYE COLOUR</b> Blue (changes a lot) <br>
<b>—HEIGHT</b> 180cm <br>
<b>—BODY BUILD.</b>Athletic <br>
<b>—TATTOOS + PIERCINGS.</b>none <br>
<b>—INTELLIGENCE.</b>fairly intelligent <br>
<b>—LIKES.</b>Fashion, trends, flirting, love, styling himself & others <br>
<b>—DISLIKES.</b> fighting, getting his hands dirty <br>
<b>—PHOBIAS.</b>n/a <br>
<b>—DISPOSITION.</b>Sarcastic, blunt, affectionate, loving, short attention span, obnoxious, self-involved <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Abilities</i></h2><br>
<b>—LANGUAGE:</b> Ancient greek/latin & French <br>
<b>—AMOKINESIS:</b> Has some control over many degrees of control over love, lust, beauty, etc. though on a much smaller scale than his mother. Can attract the opposite gender when he walks by, also has magical control over clothes, makeup, and jewelry, much like the other Aphrodite kids.<br>
<b>—CHARMSPEAK:</b> Charmspeaking is a rare type of hypnotism ability that chosen children of Aphrodite possess. A type of hypnotism or persuasion in which it allows the speaker to convince someone else to do or get whatever they want. The strength of the command depends on the tone and the emotion of the charmspeaker's voice, as well as their skill with it. Charmspeak can be negated through a number of ways; people with strong wills or intentions are unaffected, if someone is aware of a persons ability to charmspeak, then it will have a reduced effect, and beings of the same gender tend to have some resistance to charmspeak.
<h2><i>—*&; Bio</i></h2><br> <br>
Levi lived alone with his father in his early years. He seemed to always get himself into some sort of trouble, when teased for either his girlish looks or "girlish" likes (such as clothes, dolls, makeup etc) he wouldn't take it quietly and would fight back. Not to mention his ADHD meant it was very hard for him to sit still in class. All this time he never understood why he was so different, it didn't bother him that much but he did wonder why. Until he turned 7 years old and was found by a satyr, then after a long talk with his father, taken off to camp halfblood. He learnt who his mother was; Aphrodite, and everything seemed to now make sense. Levi loves staying at camp halfblood, and would stay there year round but he feels bad for his father. He was already abandoned by his lover (Aphrodite(, then dumped with a kid, he couldn't bare the thought of him being left alone. <br><br>
The more he grew and learnt about what is was to be an Aphrodite kid the more he came into himself. He felt more at home and more confident expressing his interests and likes, now with no shame.<br><br>
He somehow managed to make it through school (not with the best grades). His goal is to study fashion, though it's a little hard avoiding monsters. The older and more powerful he gets the more he attracts. And so he is spending more and more time at camp.
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</div>
<div class="tab">
<input type="radio" id="tab-4" name="tab-group-1">
<label for="tab-4">AKITO</label>
<div class="content">
<center><h2><i> —*&; Akito </i></h2></center>
<center><h3><i> semi-active // shipping status: multiship</i></h3></center><br>
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/4CQS9E9.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0; margin-left:30px;">
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/6GXex4l.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0;"><br>
<h2><i>—*&; General Information</i></h2><br>
<b>—NAME.</b> Akito <br>
<b>—NICKNAME/S.</b> Aki<br>
<b>—DOB.</b> Unknown (350+) <br>
<b>—GENDER.</b> Genderless (can assume whatever gender he pleases, typically male) <br>
<b>—ORIENTATION.</b>demiromantic // pansexual <br>
<b>—ETHNICITY.</i>Kitsune <br>
<b>—OCCUPATION.</b> >n/a wanders from place to place looking for fun and food <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Appearance & Personality</i></h2><br>
<b>—HAIR COLOUR.</b> white <br>
<b>—EYE COLOUR</b> yellow <br>
<b>—HEIGHT</b> 168cm <br>
<b>—BODY BUILD.</b>petite, but well toned muscles. <br>
<b>—TATTOOS + PIERCINGS.</b>none <br>
<b>—INTELLIGENCE.</b>high <br>
<b>—LIKES.</b>having fun, playing tricks, foxes, forests, nature, food, worship, strong or powerful people, respect <br>
<b>—DISLIKES.</b> dogs, cities, rude or offensive people, weak people <br>
<b>—PHOBIAS.</b>n/a <br>
<b>—DISPOSITION.</b>on the surface he seems friendly and easy going, but it's only a facade. he wants to have fun and play around, being still young in kitsune terms, however he is prone to mood swings and if not shown respect he will lash out. he himself can be pretty disrespectful however, unless he sees you as stronger/more powerful than him. all in all a bit of a brat <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Abilities</i></h2><br> <br>
<b>SHAPESHIFTING:</b> He is able to tranform from his usal form, a (currently) two tailed fox into a human being, either male or female though he usually prefers male. <br>
<b>TEETH & CLAWS:</b> He has sharp teeth and claws which he can use to inflict damadge if he wishes.<br>
<b>FOXFIRE:</b> He is able to create flames, though as he is young they are not too large and he isn't as skilled at controlling them.<br>
<b>ILLUSIONS:</b> A new ability of his, he doesn't have great control over it yet but he is able to create small illusions for a short period of time.
<h2><i>—*&; Bio</i></h2><br> <br>
When he was young he lived with his mother and father and siblings, growing up having the time of his life, playing around the forest with his family. However the happy times quickly came to an end when most of his forest was destroyed in a fire. He was separated from his family and never found them again, not knowing if they are alive or dead. <br><br>
From here he began wandering from place to place, searching for somewhere to settle down and call his own. He’s still rather immature and has a lot to learn, though with the passing years he grows in intelligence, strength and ability.
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</div>
<div class="tab">
<input type="radio" id="tab-5" name="tab-group-1">
<label for="tab-5">JAYLEN</label>
<div class="content">
<center><h2><i> —*&; Jaylen </i></h2></center>
<center><h3><i> semi-active // shipping status: 1/3</i></h3></center><br>
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/Q8fScc2.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0; margin-left:30px;">
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/0oeLusL.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0;"><br>
<h2><i>—*&; General Information</i></h2><br>
<b>—NAME.</b> Jaylen <br>
<b>—NICKNAME/S.</b>Jay <br>
<b>—DOB.</b> 22nd November (22 years old) <br>
<b>—GENDER.</b> male <br>
<b>—ORIENTATION.</b>Pansexual/romantic <br>
<b>—ETHNICITY.</b>(half-vampire) Irish//English mix <br>
<b>—SPOKEN LANGUES.</b>english <br>
<b>—OCCUPATION.</b> Student - studying nursing <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Appearance & Personality</i></h2><br>
<b>—HAIR COLOUR.</b> Amber orange <br>
<b>—EYE COLOUR</b> Light brown <br>
<b>—HEIGHT</b> 183cm <br>
<b>—BODY BUILD.</b>Fit, keeps in good shape. mesomorph. <br>
<b>—OTHER.</b>Has very sharp canines. <br>
<b>—TATTOOS + PIERCINGS.</b> none <br>
<b>—INTELLIGENCE.</b> Average <br>
<b>—LIKES.</b>Dogs, helping people, his job, socializing, meat <br>
<b>—DISLIKES.</b> Vampires, rude obnoxious people, bullies <br>
<b>—PHOBIAS.</b>n/a <br>
<b>—DISPOSITION.</b> Jaylen is super friendly and kind to everyone. He's a bit of a dudebro, he likes to have fun rather than be serious all the time. He's very empathetic and finds it easy to amkes friends<br>
<b>MENTAL DISORDERS.</b> Mild depression <br>
<b> WHEN DIAGNOSED.</b> 19
<h2><i>—*&; Abilities</i></h2><br> <br>
<b>Strength/Speed:</b> He's stronger than the average human, though because he refuses to drink blood he isn't at full strength, if he was he'd be superhumanly strong. The same applies for his speed and jumping abilities.
<h2><i>—*&; Bio</i></h2><br> <br>
</div>
</div>
<div class="tab">
<input type="radio" id="tab-6" name="tab-group-1">
<label for="tab-6">ADONIS</label>
<div class="content">
<center><h2><i> —*&; Adonis </i></h2></center>
<center><h3><i> active // shipping status: 1/??</i></h3></center><br>
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/hNOtVZO.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0; margin-left:30px;">
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/Jse5jY5.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0;"><br>
<h2><i>—*&; General Information</i></h2><br>
<b>—NAME.</b> Adonis Kyknos Hinode <br>
<b>—NICKNAME/S.</b> 21<br>
<b>—DOB.</b> 23rd September (21 years old) <br>
<b>—GENDER.</b> male <br>
<b>—ORIENTATION.</b> bisexual <br>
<b>—ETHNICITY.</i> greek demigod<br>
<b>—SPOKEN LANGUES.</b> english, japaense, ancient greek/latin <br>
<b>—OCCUPATION.</b> studying to be a doctor // part-time model <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Appearance & Personality</i></h2><br>
<b>—HAIR COLOUR.</b> strawberry blonde <br>
<b>—EYE COLOUR</b> amber/gold <br>
<b>—HEIGHT</b> 5'8 <br>
<b>—BODY BUILD.</b> athletic <br>
<b>—TATTOOS + PIERCINGS.</b> none<br>
<b>—INTELLIGENCE.</b> high <br>
<b>—LIKES.</b>helping people/healing people, daylight, sunrise, archery, music <br>
<b>—DISLIKES.</b>nighttime, violence <br>
<b>—PHOBIAS.</b>n/a <br>
<b>—DISPOSITION.</b>He’s very dedicated, and diligent, a hard worker who takes his responsibility and commitments seriously. Generally a kind hearted person, he wants to help other's. He's pretty easily emabrrassed. Though kind he won't put up with mean or rude people. <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Abilities</i></h2><br> <br>
TBA- healing, singing, accurate shot, harnessing sunlight
<h2><i>—*&; Bio</i></h2><br> <br>
TBA
</div>
</div>
<div class="tab">
<input type="radio" id="tab-7" name="tab-group-1">
<label for="tab-7">INDIGO</label>
<div class="content">
<center><h2><i> —*&; Indigo </i></h2></center>
<center><h3><i> active // shipping status: ??</i></h3></center><br>
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/O4UFgdk.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0; margin-left:30px;">
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/UZPNvh9.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0;"><br>
<h2><i>—*&; General Information</i></h2><br>
<b>—NAME.</b> Indigo <br>
<b>—NICKNAME/S.</b> Indy <br>
<b>—DOB.</b> 27 <br>
<b>—GENDER.</b> male <br>
<b>—ORIENTATION.</b> homo(demi)romantic // pansexual <br>
<b>—ETHNICITY.</i> <br>
<b>—SPOKEN LANGUES.</b> <br>
<b>—OCCUPATION.</b> Owns a bookshop // (verse dependent) <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Appearance & Personality</i></h2><br>
<b>—HAIR COLOUR.</b> Faded grey-blue <br>
<b>—EYE COLOUR</b> Ahsy black <br>
<b>—HEIGHT</b> tiny // 5'5 <br>
<b>—BODY BUILD.</b> on the thin side<br>
<b>—TATTOOS + PIERCINGS.</b> ear<br>
<b>EXTRA.</b> mole on left cheek under eye <br>
<b>—INTELLIGENCE.</b> average <br>
<b>—LIKES.</b>books/reading, quiet <br>
<b>—DISLIKES.</b> being touched without permisson, rich people, rude people <br>
<b>—PHOBIAS.</b>n/a <br>
<b>—DISPOSITION.</b> A little sassy, has a bit of a temper, but once you're on his good side he's good to you. <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Bio</i></h2><br> <br>
Looks super pretty and young, baby face af, but it actually 27 and is actually 80 yrs old at heart. Had 0 fucking time for any of you honestly. Just leave him along with his books and let him be happy. <br><br>
Highkey was the child of an affair with some kind of ?? important person?? royal/diplomat/politician??? who knows not fking me. Mama was sooooo pretty that papa just could not resist a quick fuck or two, or three, or a lot of fucks. Was kept a secret for the first few years of his life until mama died. Taken to rich whatever he is papa’s place and oh no he has a wife :/ Was Not Treated Well. Ended up being kicked out when he was 17. Highkey lived a very VERY shitty life from then on. But honestly he was kinda glad to be gone. Also lowkey sold himself to get by bc ya gotta do what ya gotta do sometimes when ur penniless and homeless :/ not like papa was in any contact with him or giving any mulla. Finally when he was abt 24 papa found him and was like, i rlly wanna see u, pls give me a chance etc etc. Honestly he was at the lowest point in his life, he didn’t expect anything, but he lowkey did and just hOPEd for once something would go right for him. Papa arrived and asked him to sign a non-disclosure agreement and never speak of who was his papa. Also offered him a lOT of money for it. <br><br>
That one hurt. Hurt him deep. But he was like :))))) give me ur money, i’ll sign, and literally nEVER show ur face to me again bitch. Now he runs a lil book store bc he’s always loved reading and now he can read whatever he wants when he wants :’)
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</div>
<div class="tab">
<input type="radio" id="tab-8" name="tab-group-1">
<label for="tab-8">DANTE</label>
<div class="content">
<center><h2><i> —*&; Dante </i></h2></center>
<center><h3><i> ❝ quote or something can go here any kind of length looks ok!! but it depends on <b>you</b>❞</i></h3></center><br>
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/uhI5OMB.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0; margin-left:30px;">
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/lbBeWSS.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0;"><br>
<h2><i>—*&; General Information</i></h2><br>
<b>—NAME.</b> Dante (goes by Dee mostly) <br>
<b>—NICKNAME/S.</b> Dee, Dan<br>
<b>—DOB.</b> 19 years old <br>
<b>—GENDER.</b> male <br>
<b>—ORIENTATION.</b> bisexual <br>
<b>—ETHNICITY.</i> eh <br>
<b>—SPOKEN LANGUES.</b> eh <br>
<b>—OCCUPATION.</b> basically just a rich boy <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Appearance & Personality</i></h2><br>
<b>—HAIR COLOUR.</b>dyed platinum blonde <br>
<b>—EYE COLOUR</b>green, appears almost aqua <br>
<b>—HEIGHT</b> 5'10 <br>
<b>—BODY BUILD.</b>Very atheletic, well definied muscles <br>
<b>—TATTOOS + PIERCINGS.</b>three silver rings on his left ear <br>
<b>—INTELLIGENCE.</b>high <br>
<b>—LIKES.</b> drinking, smoking, partying,having fun <br>
<b>—DISLIKES.</b> his dad, being at home <br>
<b>—PHOBIAS.</b>n/a <br>
<b>—DISPOSITION.</b>Pretty friendly and easy going, always joking around and rarely serious. <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Bio</i></h2><br>
TBA
</div>
</div>
<div class="tab">
<input type="radio" id="tab-9" name="tab-group-1">
<label for="tab-9">Ezra</label>
<div class="content">
<center><h2><i> —*&; Ezra </i></h2></center>
<center><h3><i> ❝ quote or something can go here any kind of length looks ok!! but it depends on <b>you</b>❞</i></h3></center><br>
<img src="https://64.media.tumblr.com/6bb1917ee668d58c2e888e7fe8f90641/tumblr_o4oiqnRA5l1u4r8r1o1_100.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0; margin-left:30px;">
<img src="https://64.media.tumblr.com/6bb1917ee668d58c2e888e7fe8f90641/tumblr_o4oiqnRA5l1u4r8r1o1_100.png" style="border: 10px solid #ffffff; outline: 1px solid #f0f0f0;"><br>
<h2><i>—*&; General Information</i></h2><br>
<b>—NAME.</b> Ezra Flynn<br>
<b>—NICKNAME/S.</b> Ez <br>
<b>—DOB.</b> 26 <br>
<b>—GENDER.</b> male <br>
<b>—ORIENTATION.</b> eh <br>
<b>—ETHNICITY.</i> caucasian <br>
<b>—SPOKEN LANGUES.</b> english <br>
<b>—OCCUPATION.</b> high school teacher <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Appearance & Personality</i></h2><br>
<b>—HAIR COLOUR.</b> light brown <br>
<b>—EYE COLOUR</b> amber <br>
<b>—HEIGHT</b> 4′11 <br>
<b>—BODY BUILD.</b> tiny, little muscle, thin <br>
<b>—TATTOOS + PIERCINGS.</b> none <br>
<b>—INTELLIGENCE.</b> average/high <br>
<b>—LIKES.</b> teaching kids, an occasional drink, <br>
<b>—DISLIKES.</b> BULLIES he will fight every bully ever. some of this kids in his classes tbh. his height <br>
<b>—PHOBIAS.</b>n/a <br>
<b>—DISPOSITION.</b> friendly, welcoming, helpful. will scold you if you misbehave though. <br>
<h2><i>—*&; Bio</i></h2><br>
TBA
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</div>
</div>
</div>
<div id="credit"><a href="http://palsrph">palsrph</a></div>
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For your queer reblog,why say gay if you are panromanitc?
WARNING I AM VERY OPEN ABOUT THIS, SO IF SQUISM DO NOT READ!
Referring to this post and that is a valid question. I do feel comfortable saying “I can be romantically attracted to all genders”, yet wondering about the sexual aspect of my sexual orientation. To clarify I am and have been romantically strictly for my 22 years of life (even never self-pleasured), yet a half a year ago in my college, I felt myself wondering what it likes to sexual pleasure a friend. This friend (let’s call her Juliet) and I have liked each other since Fall 2016 to Fall 2018, yet I felt she had a very different temperant then me, but my feelings for Juliet did grow less, making it more okay to date two people between such time frames. No worries she knew and was comfortable about this and had her own semi-relationship with one of her own friends.
Only, Summer of 2018 I was experiencing thoughts of what it be like. Nothing graphic or even traditional sexually, just making out, while barely in clothing, and yes these did grow, yet still romantic. However, again Juliet and I have different emotional levels. Such as I am upset, I share my thoughts and if she is upset she either storm out of the room or be passive aggressive. So with these thoughts, I was unsure if this my mind telling me, I would like to date her, yet logically no.
Now before I go on, yes images of women in swimsuits and lingerie as visually attractive; Men are it more “okay cool he is in shape”. However I was not sexually aroused, I just felt if I had to see which one I feel more comfortable being nude it be women (if cis and trans). However again it is not a desire to sleep with or similar, just the curiosity of pleasuring someone for that sounds rewarding. However again the keywords are pleasure and rewards, not something I want for a “return” or something. Also, I am wondering if this openness can apply to all genders and not just women. Only it is not easy to say, for the few times I get close to a man and be interested in the individual, I tend to get “wait if you were to be sexual, you top me?” or “that prostate idea is kinda gay” (I am not sure why straight men tend to like me, LGBTQ+ gents were are you? Also even straight guys I heard like the “back door” so not saying only LGBTQ+ men can like this. Lord even some do not), and more. I know someone into it, yet again not curious and more importantly still working out things in my mind. I literal had a pal tell me that the idea of a guy “splotching IN me sounds hot” and I was just not comfortable with that visual, yet all the power to her.
Additionally preventing to actual search is for a long time I consider waiting till marriage, yet again with Juliet (and realizing one person I dated I could feel that way to, and she helped to be aware this attraction can be to trans women, even if one former friend was like “yet she still looks like a man”. Women are women and to paraphrase a close friend “if someone says they are a woman that is validating”) and a couple others, plus dreams.
I do want to clarify I would pan is still a valid term for me, but I like gay for it is own personal umbrella term. Even another my friends said “it would lessen the boxing of the community” and he happens to be gay (homosexual) and that was validated, as well other friends in the LGBTQ+ Community, not just him. Plus it is gender neutral and as long “experience attraction to the same gender, then still some aspect of homosexual” (as he put it). Now I respect terms like bi, poly, pan, and to extent queer, but I like gay more.
At the end though, it is a good point, is it fair to say gay or pan in my case? I only want to ask you Anonymous and ANYONE else, for this is a good thing to talk about. Funny enough I was debating making my tiny list of actor crushes I have, for men are cute, only keyword debate because I respect a couple of them have only dated men and I understand that is odd, yet it is not like any of them date me. Anyways thanks for asking this and again figuring this aspect of myself. I do know my sexual feelings are not often, yet tend to be towards I have know, so am I grey-acesexual yet towards women or homo-demisexual.
“Grey-a and grey-asexual may also be referred to as grey-sexual. A related concept is grey-romantic, or a person whose experience of romantic attraction and desire falls between aromantic and romantic. Another related concept is demisexual, referring to people who only experience sexual attraction or desire after a strong emotional bond is formed with a person. Like grey-a, demisexual was coined on AVEN in 2006.” from here. Have a marvelous day everyone.
P.s. I do not mind pan, so know I do fall under pansexuality (first came out with this term in July 2014); I just see myself happier with women, and yes you can have a prefence for what gender(s) you like.
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OC Meme 2, Electric Boogaloo: Tavah
You thought I was done, but ooooooh no, I’ll take any excuse to talk about my bois.
DISCLAIMER: Due to the campaign that I’m using him in, I’m not able to talk about certain details of this boi’s backstory just yet.
1. What’s their full name? Why was that chosen? Does it mean anything?
Why was “Tavah” Chosen? I thought it sounded appropriate. Its an earthy, simple kind of name that suits a Minotaur.
2. Do they have any titles? How did they get them?
Apart from the previously “Earned” title of slave, no.
3. Did they have a good childhood? What are fond memories they have of it? What’s a bad memory?
Tavah has no memories of his childhood, and at time of Writing, I’m not able to talk about his past in super detail.
4. What is their relationship with their parents? What’s a good and bad memory with them? Did they know both parents?
See Disclaimer above.
5. Do they have any siblings? What’s their names? What is their relationship with them? Has their relationship changed since they were kids to adults?
See Disclaimer above.
6. What were they like at school? Did they enjoy it? Did they finish? What level of higher education did they reach? What subjects did they enjoy? Which did they hate?
Tavah has never received an education. All skills and knowledge he has currently is from his own journey through the world. If I had to put him at a level, I’d say he is about as knowledgeable as a thirteen year old, With the literacy of a 6 year old.
7. Did they have lots of friends as a child? Did they keep any of their childhood friends into adulthood?
No and No.
8. Did they have pets as a child? Do they have pets as an adult? Do they like animals?
No pets as a child, but I feel as an adult he would probably love the idea of having one, His current situation wouldn’t really allow for it though. He certainly likes the idea of dragons, he’s always wanted to see one.
9. Do animals like them? Do they get on well with animals?
Despite his large size, he is quite gentle in most situations, interacting with animals included. For whatever reason, they seem to approach him and seek out pets and the like.
10. Do they like children? Do children like them? Do they have or want any children? What would they be like as a parent? Or as a godparent/babysitter/ect?
Jesus Christ, Imagining Tavah as a parent is just a disaster to me. He can barely take care of himself, I highly doubt he would make a good parent. As for WANTING kids, he’s never really given it much thought. Doesn’t help that its not really possible given he is a man in a relationship with another man.
11. Do they have any special diet requirements? Are they a vegetarian? Vegan? Have any allergies?
He eats anything really. He tends to lean towards meat, as its rather good at sating his massive appetite.
12. What is their favorite food?
Steak, Ironically.
13. What is their least favorite food?
Probably fish. It smells weird.
14. Do they have any specific memories of food/a restaurant/meal?
He’s never sat down for a proper “Meal”. He eats quickly and has never shared a meal with someone else that wasn’t for any reason other than not starving.
15. Are they good at cooking? Do they enjoy it? What do others think of their cooking?
He can cook about as well as he can do ballet. He tried once, it burned. He’s learning though!
16. Do they collect anything? What do they do with it? Where do they keep it?
While he hasn’t started, he wants to build up a collection of weapons and armor gathered from all around the world. They fascinate him. If he had his way, he would also love a zoo filled with draconics.
17. Do they like to take photos? What do they like to take photos of? Selfies? What do they do with their photos?
Considering photos don’t exist in his setting, No. He isn’t much of an appreciator of art.
18. What’s their favorite genre of: books, music, tv shows, films, video games and anything else
Tales of epic heroes and over the top 80′s/90′s action films.
19. What’s their least favourite genres?
Horror and probably anything with country.
20. Do they like musicals? Music in general? What do they do when they’re favourite song comes?
He’s enjoyed what little music he has heard in taverns and such. He’s thought about playing a guitar of some kind, but his fingers are rather large for it.
21. Do they have a temper? Are they patient? What are they like when they do lose their temper?
Absolutely. While he is usually a patient and kind boy, when it comes to combat he is much less so. He understands that he needs to kill in self defence, and it doesn’t bother him when he does so. He’s also got a rather bestial instinct, as he tends to go “Berserk” if he is hurt enough or someone does some serious damage to his partner.
22. What are their favourite insults to use? What do they insult people for? Or do they prefer to bitch behind someone’s back?
He doesn’t really insult people. He doesn’t see the point in being a dick. Why insult when you can be nice instead?
23. Do they have a good memory? Short term or long term? Are they good with names? Or faces?
Not in the slightest. The only name he has remembered so far is his partners and a lizard girl he met.
24. What is their sleeping pattern like? Do they snore? What do they like to sleep on? A soft or hard mattress?
He sleeps whenever he feels tired, and he prefers to BE the mattress for someone else. He’s rather comfy to lie on.
25. What do they find funny? Do they have a good sense of humour? Are they funny themselves?
He finds many simple things funny, but he himself isn’t really humorous, although he does make people smile with his cute antics.
26. How do they act when they’re happy? Do they sing? Dance? Hum? Or do they hide their emotions?
He has a smile that is almost 95% of the time on his face. It doesn’t take much to please him. Tavah isn’t even aware its possible to hide emotions, He has no reason to and so he doesn’t.
27. What makes them sad? Do they cry regularly? Do they cry openly or hide it? What are they like when they are sad?
He is upset by the idea of being a drag and bringing people down. I would say he cries regularly, but not always sad tears. Like above, he doesn’t hide his emotions or who he is.
28. What is their biggest fear? What in general scares them? How do they act when they’re scared?
Not being able to help in some way. Or, for a more literal phobia, he is terrified by the idea of being restricted in his movement.. Chains, Rope, Any sort of binding,etc. When he IS scared, he is quiet and tries not to get in the way.
29. What do they do when they find out someone else’s fear? Do they tease them? Or get very over protective?
Extremely over protective. He’s like that naturally, so finding out someones weakness would be him doing his best to prevent it being used against them.
30. Do they exercise? Regularly? Or only when forced? What do they act like pre-work out and post-work out?
His line of work (Adventuring, Hero for hire, Merc,etc) is all the exercise he needs. He walks everywhere and carries things for his partner usually.
31. Do they drink? What are they like drunk? What are they like hungover? How do they act when other people are drunk or hungover? Kind or teasing?
He has never had a drink, but I assume that if he did get drunk, he would become incredibly childish.
32. What do they dress like? What sorta shops do they buy clothes from? Do they wear the fashion that they like? What do they wear to sleep? Do they wear makeup? What’s their hair like?
Tavah absolutely hates clothing, but still wears some due to being told he isn't’ allowed to walk around naked all the time. As for what he does wear, he has some plate and leather straps keeping his torso protected (But mostly bare), alongside a sash/tabard to cover his privates. He wears no makeup and likes to keep his hair in a semi-kept Mohawk. He also grows facial hair quite quickly, but likes to keep it trimmed to a goatee along his jawline. He actually has no idea how to shave or cut his hair, he has his partner do that for him.
33. What underwear do they wear? Boxers or briefs? Lacey? Comfy granny panties?
A loincloth, which is the only piece of clothing he doesn’t mind wearing.
34. What is their body type? How tall are they? Do they like their body?
He is incredibly buff, and he knows it. He doesn’t really show it off, but he has no issues with people staring. He’s quite the tall boi, standing at around 7′8ft tall.
35. What’s their guilty pleasure? What is their totally unguilty pleasure?
Guilty pleasure? Spicy food that he has no tolerance to. Unguilty pleasure? Picking people up, and either hugging them or carrying them around.
36. What are they good at? What hobbies do they like? Can they sing?
He’s good at strength based tasks, and has some skill in healing, alongside the obvious advantages in fighting. Apart from that, not much. He hasn’t found a hobby yet and if he sang I doubt it would be enjoyable.
37. Do they like to read? Are they a fast or slow reader? Do they like poetry? Fictional or non fiction?
He doesn’t really enjoy reading, since he is terrible at it. He knows some letters, but still requires help for anything harder then a storefront sign. He’s never heard poetry, but I feel he would enjoy it.
38. What do they admire in others? What talents do they wish they had?
Marital skill and good morals. He wishes he could speak better, since he still has difficulty with long sentences.
39. Do they like letters? Or prefer emails/messaging?
Can’t write and internet doesn’t exist in his setting.
40. Do they like energy drinks? Coffee? Sugary food? Or can they naturally stay awake and alert?
He can stay awake longer then most, but has a tendency to sleep in if staying up for long periods of time. He finds coffee bitter, but enjoys sweet drinks and food.
41. What’s their sexuality? What do they find attractive? Physically and mentally? What do they like/need in a relationship?
Oh boy. The fun question.
Extremely bi. He cares little for looks, but has a bias towards other muscly people like himself, regardless of gender. Mentally, he tends to like people who are as soft as him, preferring to talk and be open with those that have a good sense of morals. He dislikes rough and tough guys/gals and will tend to avoid them.
Despite being Bi, he does lean more towards men and the “Assets” that accompany said gender.
As for what he needs in a relationship, someone soothing and nice that he can easily be himself with. He tends to ask questions alot and is incredibly simple minded, so someone willing to teach him about the world is what he is happy to have found.
42. What are their goals? What would they sacrifice anything for? What is their secret ambition?
Currently, he travels with his friend/Partner/Lover/Boyfriend Reinhard, and would easily give his own life to save him. He has no higher goals apart from that, but does wish to see a dragon one day and do whatever he can to help those in need.
43. Are they religious? What do they think of religion? What do they think of religious people? What do they think of non religious people?
While he is aware of the concept, it doesn’t make a lot of sense to him. He doesn’t judge people if they are religious however. If it makes them happy or gives them guidance, he accepts that and is happy for them.
44. What is their favourite season? Type of weather? Are they good in the cold or the heat? What weather do they complain in the most?
He likes the end of winter/start of spring the most. Seeing the flowers and trees bloom is like magic to him. He tends to dislike sand, as it gets into his fur and annoys him greatly. He isn’t sure why, but he harbors a great resentment towards the desert.
45. How do other people see them? Is it similar to how they see themselves?
Most people see him as a big, scary minotaur, but one conversation proves otherwise. He’s incredibly gentle and kind, and sees himself similarly. One day, he hopes to be seen as a hero.
46. Do they make a good first impression? Does their first impression reflect them accurately? How do they introduce themselves?
First impressions are usually bad, as he is a large, semi-naked buff Minotaur with a large axe usually resting on his shoulder. Like above, this scary image is disproved quickly. He doesn’t usually introduce himself, Reinhard almost always doing that for him.
47. How do they act in a formal occasion? What do they think of black tie wear? Do they enjoy fancy parties and love to chit chat or loathe the whole event?
He’s never been to one, but I imagine it would be a disaster. I’m sure he would act as friendly as possible, But I doubt others would treat him the same.
48. Do they enjoy any parties? If so what kind? Do they organise the party or just turn up? How do they act? What if they didn’t want to go but were dragged along by a friend?
I imagine he would try and be way too friendly and would need to be chaparoned.
49. What is their most valued object? Are they sentimental? Is there something they have to take everywhere with them?
His axe, easily. Its magical and can be summoned to his hand at will, so its always on his person. He doesn’t remember where he got it, but its the one thing thats remained constant in his life.
50. If they could only take one bag of stuff somewhere with them: what would they pack? What do they consider their essentials?
Camping Supplies, Reinhard, His axe, Food. He is a simple boi.
#Writing#My Writing#Writer#OC#my oc#my oc stuff#This took way longer than I thought#Tavah#minotaur#profile
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