#reposting bc it did not show up in ANY of the tags for some reason. functional website.
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STAR WARS: THE BAD BATCH 2.02 "Ruins of War" & 2.09 "The Crossing" | 3.07 "Extraction"
#clown makeup ON#tbb spoilers#tbbedit#swedit#starwarsedit#swanimation#filmtvcentral#swsource#userbariss#tbb#the bad batch#tech#tbb tech#clone x#by me*#i know this is probably nothing but i was having flashbacks the entire time#reposting bc it did not show up in ANY of the tags for some reason. functional website.
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❤️Natalie Scatorccio NSFW Alphabet❤️ (18+, Minors DNI, you will be blocked)
❤️Read the SFW Alphabet here!❤️
Fanfiction master list
disclaimer: don't repost my work. I only post on Tumblr and on Ao3. anything else is stolen and should be removed immediately
Warnings: Minor spoiler for Season 2 episode 8! It's all dirty [AFAB Reader/anatomy used if any] (18+, Minors DNI, you will be blocked)
Word Count: 1,359
A/N: Hello lovelies! I know a lot of you wanted it, so here you go! Natalie's nsfw alphabet! She actually was a lot easier to write about than expected, probably because she's so straightforward anyways. Not much more for me to say, so enjoy, and as always, feel free to leave questions or comments in my comments or ask box, and happy reading!❤️
Natalie Scatorccio Tag List:
Yellowjackets Tag List: @frasersgf
General Tag List: @summergeezburr
-❤️-
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Nat is the type to need a cigarette after sex. I mean, maybe not a cigarette specifically bc I don't remember if she smokes in the show, but in my headcanon it's an every-now-and-then thing for her. But, for whatever reason she never got hooked on it like she did other things. But when it comes to caring for you specifically afterward she’d get you a warm towel to wash up at the very least. Everyone deserves that. But in a committed relationship she’d go as far as running a bath for you if you like and helping you in if it was a rather intense evening
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
She loves your hips, I just know it. No matter what shape or size, she just loves having something to hang onto, ya know? It’s just the perfect spot for her hands and she loves running her thumbs over your stomach
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
I know for a fact that she makes you clean her fingers with your tongue when she’d done with you. She wants you to know exactly what she’s tasting.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
Not really a dirty secret but she loves when her partner and this is only in a “serious” relationship (as serious as Natalie will get at least) takes complete control because she gets to be in a state where she’s not in control, but she knows she’s completely safe
E = Experience (how experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
Oh, we all know that Ms. Scatorccio knows exactly what she’s doing. When it comes to sex, she’s been around the block and back and she’s always willing to do another lap if she feels the need.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Imma say she enjoys receiving while face-sitting because it's the best of both worlds. She enjoys being on top, but she also likes receiving, and she loves the feeling of your arms and hands tight around her thighs
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? etc.)
She’s more serious in my opinion. She doesn’t find sex silly.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
I think she shaves everything (arms, legs, etc) but not regularly. She's cool with having stubble wherever so long as it's not bothering her.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? The romantic aspect)
Eh, again it depends on what kind of relationship you’ve got. I think over time she could learn to be romantic, but at the start, sex is a give and take for her. “You get what you need as long as I get what I need,” kind of thing. She’ll never make a big deal out of it though. She might have when she was younger, but she’d far more seasoned now, shall we say. She knows what she wants and that’s her priority
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
She’s gotten good at using her hands because I doubt they let you bring any kind of toy with you to rehab, but she prefers a vibrator some nights
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
I think she’d enjoy mirror sex. She’d like watching herself but also forcing you to watch how she makes you feel. She's also into teeth. Like, not necessarily biting, but she likes someone with a nice set of teeth
L = Location (favorite places to do they do)
She’s down for semi-public sex but still wants some privacy so anywhere with a locked door is fair game
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
There isn’t a lot that doesn't turn her on really. Genuine interest in her sexually sometimes is all it takes. But she likes being teased and having her partner play coy with her. It makes her feel like a lady
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)
I think after watching S2 Ep 8 this is a given, but knife play…
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
She’s into both but has a fondness for receiving, ngl. This girl firmly insists that she’s a switch but she loves to bottom. Might sound like an oxymoron, but she loves the power she holds while receiving. Digging her hands in your hair and holding you where she wants you, squeezing your head or hand between her legs. Honestly, she’d gladly suffocate you if you let her
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
She’s fast and rough when she’s on top, no questions asked. She likes getting to the point
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
She’s quite fond of them. If it's guaranteed you’re not getting a night in together she’d gladly take a quickie in a bathroom stall if she needs it
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)
Once there is some established relationship I think she’s down to try new things, but she’s not experimenting during a one-night stand, she might have done that before, but by now that’s behind her and she’s only experimenting with established trust from now on
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)
I don’t think she has a lot of stamina when it’s her cumming. She can have two, maybe three before she calls it quits. She could probably go for longer but once she’s had one or two she’s satisfied
T = Toys (do they own toys? Do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
She doesn’t have a wide collection, just a few vibratos that she orders online while drunk and horny on random nights. But she’ll use them now and then with herself and whenever you want if that's something you’re into. I think she’d be really into using one on you while you eat her out.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
She’s a big tease. She enjoys being a mean girl sometimes!
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
I think she’s pretty quiet, but not for any lack of enjoyment. She’s got those breathy moans that swoon from the back of her throat and she tends to suck on her teeth
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
She’s got nice hands. She keeps her nails short, partly because I think she’s a nail-biter, but she has the decency to file them before anything intimate happens so they’re nice and smooth. But she’s got long, thin fingers that really accentuate her knuckles and she’s always got a plethora of rings on so she makes a show of taking them off for you.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
She’s quite thin and lanky. I mean, we pretty much saw everything when she was walking around her motel in her bra and her fishnets.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
It’s definitely high, but she knows she can get what she wants whenever or handle anything she needs on her own, so it's not often a “driver” for her or anything. Unless she’s drunk. If she's with someone she’s deemed as her person and she’s drunk, she wants in your pants as soon as possible
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterward)
She’s not the type to fall asleep after sex. She prefers having some kind of nightcap first (a drink or a cigarette or maybe even both to mix things up. Who knows!) you’re more likely than not to fall asleep before her which is when she makes her graceful exit if she’s not in her bed. However, in a committed relationship she’ll get back in bed with you after whatever “treat” she’s finished and hold you from behind till she knows you’re asleep. She likes kissing your shoulders when you’re naked. But she won't fall asleep that way, eventually turning over to her other side
#natalie scatorccio#natalie scatorccio x reader#natalie scatorccio headcanons#yellowjackets x reader#yellowjackets fanfic#yellowjackets#yellowjackets headcanons#charcater headcanons#character alphabet
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Since I can't seem to figure out how to repost your tags- I am going to say that Arthur Dayne didn't think Ned Stark would hurt baby Jon simply for the reason he was at the Tower of Joy instead of hightailing it to Starfall with baby and the wetnurse Wylla in tow. Once Jon was born, the need to stay at the tower was defunct. Lyanna dying or not, had bluntly served her purpose. The fate of Rhaenys and Aegon made it crystal clear that any one with dragon blood was in danger from the new regime. Doubly so for a child of Rhaegar and Lyanna. If Arthur was really concern about the baby rather than his own personal honor, his purpose would be to get on a fast ship to reunite with the exiled Targaryens or pulling a Jon Con and raising the baby himself in secret. But that isn't as neat a ending as dying in battle serving an oath to a dead man.
Oh yeah, I was kinda writing off the cuff there bc i’m very tired today lmao BUT
I have seen the main argument for a more sympathetic look at Arthur, Oswell, and Gerold is that they feared for Jon’s life, and likely had some sort of affection for Jon and Lyanna. That is something I can absolutely believe - like you said, the brutal murder of Rhaenys and Aegon is more than enough evidence that Jon is not safe in Westeros. I can certainly understand why, even with the best of intentions, the Kingsguard would be wary of Ned. Even if Ned holds no anger at Lyanna, he could hold plenty towards baby Jon or transfer his anger at Rhaegar to baby Jon. It’s a real risk in attempting to confront the man seen as the number two face of this rebellion with the son of his number one enemy.
But I think from the surrounding events, what most likely was happening was that Rhaegar did not take the rebllion nor his father’s madness as seriously as he should have until after the Sack (I know Jaime and Barristan mention Rhaegar planning beforehand to get rid of his father, but like, clearly it wasn’t that much of a priority considering he abandons whatever plans he made at Harrenhal to chase after, kidnap, and impregnate Lyanna while the realm burned around him SO!). IF he married Lyanna, it was likely after he found out Elia and their children had been murdered, and he was probably panicked over the situation in KL, his alliance with Dorne, and what this means for his prophecy (a far cry from the happy little scene we get in the show), and did it to legitimize what he thinks is baby Visenya as a sort of last resort, but did not ever believe he was going to lose the Battle of the Trident. We have no idea what information was getting to Rhaegar prior to Oswell coming to fetch him, and no idea what Oswell told Rhaegar, or if Rhaegar was even in a proper state of mind to comprehend it. When Rhaegar goes to fight Robert, for all we know, he has no earthly idea that he and his father have lost basically all of Westeros except Dorne and ONLY because of Elia. Personally, I think it’s likely that it’s not until he shows up to command the Dornish forces that he realizes just how fucked he is. The Kingsguard probably felt the same, and when they got word Rhaegar died, just fully gave up, condemning themselves, Lyanna, and maybe even the baby to death alongside their fallen Great King Who Should Have Been, Rhaegar.
Because otherwise, like, what are they even still doing at the tower. They wave off Rhaella and Viserys but if what they wanted was to actually protect the last of Rhaegar’s blood, they should have been trying to link up with Rhaella!! Feels pretty relevant that Rhaella know Rhaegar has another potential heir but they just sit around at the Tower instead for WEEKS after the Trident. It only seems nonsensical on the surface; Willem Darry had not yet given up, had two terrified, very small children suddenly in his care, and did his absolute best to try to take care of them. He has more honor in his pinky toe than either of the those three who saw a 16 year old and a newborn in dire need of help and went “rhaegar was wrong and there’s no use in trying anymore” and rolled over and died. Same for JonCon raising a child that is not his; what those two do is put the life of a child before any other intangible oaths or ideals, acting quickly and decisively under really stressful circumstances. Contrast to the Tower of Joy, where Lyanna doesn’t even have a Maester present to help deliver the baby.
So yeah, I do think it’s likely they worried Ned was a danger, and had some sort of fondness for Lyanna and baby Jon. Doesn’t mean they made the right decisions, or that their affection and fear ultimately mattered in the grand scheme of things. It’s tragic sure, but far more tragic is that they never turned to the dying teenager in their care and ask what her opinion was on how her final days should go.
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Savanaclaw’s Reaction to a Black Tiger!Reader
FEATURING : LEONA KINGSCHOLAR + RUGGIE BUCCHI + JACK HOWL
GENRE : FLUFF
C/W : GN!READER
LIBRARIAN’S NOTE/S : requested by @justeclem44 the gender wasn’t specified so i just made it into gn!reader. i don’t know much about black tigers so i had to do some research. still! i may be mistaken with a few information tho. had to repost it bc it wasn't showing up in the tags, again
NOTES & REBLOGS ARE VERY MUCH APPRECIATED ^^
PROLOGUE
Black Tigers are known to be very rare—close to extinction even! Not even people who live in Sunset Savanna see many of your kind. Cause if they are rare on Earth then I think they’d also be rare in the TWST Universe. Though, your appearances aside, you’re just like any beast-person in NRC. A human hybrid with your beastly characteristics and personalities. You just happen to look unique and live in remote places.
☆ LEONA KINGSCHOLAR ☆
As a prince from Sunset Savanna, he’d be pretty shocked to see someone of your kind. Your first encounter would be something like him sensing your aura. Like the inner animal instinct in him tells him that someone with a dominant aura is approaching. It’s not that threatening to him because he knows his capabilities but his instinct is just telling him to be wary because it’s “new” like someone he hasn’t encountered before.
It could be like when he’s sleeping at the botanical gardens and you entered. His ears and tail that was lying on the ground relaxed would instantly shoot up. Then when you approach his direction, he’d peek one eye open to check who it is, and to his surprise, it’s a Black Tiger Beast-Person.
Leona wouldn’t openly show his surprise though and might even act nonchalant about it. Unlike the other two who’d go “I didn’t know your kind still existed.” Leona would know your kind still existed because he’s royalty and he was probably (forced or not) to meet one of your kind. With his father or Falena probably droning “You’re a prince and you should meet them so you know what’s going on in the kingdom and bla bla bla.”
Going back to your first encounter—it’s honestly kinda dry because he wouldn’t mind you that much. I don’t really see Leona as someone who does small talks. Unless you instigate it first or if it’s necessary to do so because Leona likes his peace and quiet for good quality naps. It’s not like you mind though because tigers prefer to be alone.
Interactions-wise, I know he wouldn’t be hostile in any way towards you—just don’t give him any reason to. He’d treat you just like any other person—to him, whether your kind is rare or not—it’s not a reason for him to treat you any differently as long as you’re not posing a threat, purposely annoying, or getting in his way.
Despite his pride and arrogance that doesn’t exactly mean that Leona belittles you like he still has his air of arrogance and pride but he’s still being civilized. So he isn’t exactly belittling you and your capabilities (like he does with other students).
He is aware of you and your kind’s capabilities cause IF I recall correctly, it was mentioned that at some point in his childhood Leona tried to please or impress the people around him [or was it just his parents cause I saw it said somewhere that Leona could play chess by himself and like taught himself just so he could impress his parents(??) or was I mistaken?].
Regardless of that, I still headcanon he probably still studied it just to feel validated. So like him being literate in these things would be no surprise be it self-taught or taught by some expensive intelligent teacher hired by the king. If you ever end up being partnered with him in any school-related activity or just anything, and then you did exceptionally well, he’ll be the type to offhandedly compliment you.
So it’s overall chill and casual with Leona, like you two have this mutual agreement of “I won’t bother you as long as you don’t bother me.”
☆ RUGGIE BUCCHI ☆
Now, this one is interesting—Despite Ruggie growing up in a poor environment, I’m sure he’d be aware of your kind. His grandmother probably educated him or he could’ve had an encounter with one of your kind.
Either way, I think your first encounter would be interestingly funny. I imagine that Ruggie’s running out and about because of Leona’s errands. Then boom! The cliche moment of you two bumping into each other happens. Ruggie would immediately apologize while picking up the things he dropped—that’s if he was carrying anything, to begin with. So you stood up, dusting yourself off.
Ruggie would be shocked to see it was a Black Tiger Beast Person (it’s a mouthful ik but I can’t find the right term so please bear with me XD) then he would just offhandedly mention “Oh I didn’t know your kind still existed.”
Don’t worry, he means no offense with his statement. It’s just Ruggie being Ruggie, anyways upon noticing your silence—he’ll apologize and explain that it was his first time seeing someone like you in person then laugh it off with his signature laugh before leaving.
Another scenario of your first encounter could be if you like spending your free time in a not-so-solitary (because Leona also stays there napping). Still, peaceful silence at the botanical gardens then you two could possibly meet there while Ruggie fetches Leona. He’d still offhandedly mention the same thing and etc. but he just doesn’t leave right away because he needs to go with Leona.
So until Leona decides to get up, he’ll just be there and it opens a chance for a small chat between the two of you—whether Leona chooses to join in before leaving is up to him but like I mentioned in his part, I don’t see Leona as the kind of person to do small talks so the most you would get from him is a comment regarding the topic you two are talking about.
Ruggie much like Leona wouldn’t really care that much. Though, unlike Leona, this hyena would be more casual and a bit friendlier about it. Should the two of you ever bump into each other again then I’d see Ruggie having no problem with striking up a conversation with you.
It’s up to you if you’d want to befriend him because either way—he is chill. Tigers are solitary creatures but that doesn’t you can’t make friends. If you do befriend him, expect pranks from him but don’t worry he’ll make sure not to go too far about it.
☆ JACK HOWL ☆
Now the ever-so earnest 1st Year, unlike the other two. Jack grew up in the Shaftlands or the Land of Pyroxene. So I don’t think he would’ve had any way to meet or encounter anyone from your kind. Though that does not mean that he isn’t aware of your kind—I like to think that at some point in his childhood that he has read those animal picture books.
Plus Jack has younger siblings, I’m quite sure that he has shown them the picture books at his siblings’ request. Now your first encounter with him can be kinda awkward especially if you’re older than him. There could be many scenarios with your first encounter with Jack since you’re all in the same school like it could be when he’s with the first years and then their bickering caused you some trouble.
Jack and Yuu would immediately apologize for the trouble their friends are causing then imagine Jack’s surprise to see it was you a Black Tiger Beast Person. He’d be left speechless while you tell them that it was okay before walking off *cue awkwardness*—his friends would start swarming him with questions, asking why he was shocked—did you two know each other, etc.
It could also be when you two go partnered up for an Alchemy class and this scenario would open the chance for the two of you to talk and like I mentioned previously above, Jack would go somewhere along the lines of “Your kind still existed?!” He also means no offense but Jack is genuinely shocked and he is probably the most surprised out of the trio.
Like I said, Jack grew up in the Shaftlands, and even though it’s very big—there’s little to no chance that he would encounter anyone from your kind. Once Jack sees your questioning gaze that says, “First time you've seen one of like me?” He’d feel so guilty that his ears would visibly dropdown. *cue brief awkwardness*
He’d immediately apologize and start to explain the reason for his reaction. Out of the three, he’d be the friendliest of them all, and if you do happen to join the Track and Field club or just any athletic club that shows him your prowess. He would look up to you and admire whatever trait you have that he finds admirable, be it your dedication, strength, discipline, power, or anything.
Much like his upperclassmen, Jack wouldn’t treat you any differently because to him, everyone should be treated equally and he wouldn’t want to be treated any differently just because he stands out or anything. Though he’d treat you with more respect like he does with Ruggie and Leona if you so happen to be older than him.
Jack would know that your kind is solitary creatures so him being close with you would also depend on you but either way, he’d be sure to acknowledge your presence whenever you two bump into each other. He'd be a chill friend to have, unlike Ruggie.
!! DO NOT REPOST ANYWHERE ELSE !! THIS IS THE PROPERTY OF YUUNEMI !! IT DOESN’T CLAIM TO OWN THE CHARACTERS THAT BELONG TO THEIR RIGHTFUL OWNERS !!
#twisted wonderland x reader#savanaclaw x reader#leona kingscholar x reader#jack howl x reader#ruggie bucchi#twst x reader#twst fanfic#twst imagines#twst fluff#twst leona#twst jack#twst ruggie
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what's the deal with john darnielle /gen
ah I figured I would one day get this kind of ask bc I do vague post about it a lot. and sorry if I made anyone paranoid w that I'm only ever like. exorcising my own feelings. that being said, what I'm gonna describe is completely my own experience, I have no expectation or desire for this to become any sort of call out or whatever. I'm making this post unrebloggable for that reason.
in September of 2018 a tumblr user who has since deactivated (and who I did not know personally or follow) made this post in which they described a long and difficult interpersonal relationship they'd had with jd, in which the op felt manipulated and uncomfortable. you can't access the read more bc they op deactivated, but there's someone in the reblogs who reposted the entirety of what was under the cut. there's also a lot of people being nasty to op in the replies and reblogs. I have no interest in relitigating the discourse that followed. tmg tumblr was, at the time, comparatively tiny, but it got pretty ugly on twitter and reddit. I did not follow all of that. I know other fans talked about similar experiences (also detailed in reblogs I think).
entirely separately, I had just been through one of the hardest seasons of my life, and in fact, on the day I read this post, I had just torn my acl. I also had concert tickets for a tmg show the upcoming weekend. I cried for a long time after reading that post (also bc my leg hurt) and I had absolutely no idea how to feel. I had been a tmg fan for 7+ years at that point; like many other fans, their songs were hugely emotionally important to me and helped me get through a lot. and I felt the kind of intense parasocial connection to jd that op described as the origin point of their relationship, which scared me a lot. I have been through many phases of grief over this, and I spent a longgggggg time in straight up anger, at jd for the way he treated these fans, at myself for getting caught up in what I could now see was an extreme fan mentality, at the music for still meaning an enormous amount to me. I'm not gonna call tmg fandom (at the time) a cult, but I do think there is/was a kind of cult worship mentality surrounding the music and especially jd, which is also tied up with his own experiences with christianity and religion, and just generally this belief that the music can save our lives. he often says we saved our own lives, he was just the soundtrack. in my own journey with suicidality I've found that the rhetoric of having saved my life (past tense) actually positions me to fall even further the next time. I also went through a period of questioning the masochistic relationship i had with a lot of the songs that are about being a monster/being unforgivable/not deserving existence. those are just some of the many evolutions of my grief I've experienced over the past 5 years.
its all really messy and gnarly and big to me, and I have no way of knowing if i would've come to these conclusions if I'd never seen that post. a lot of tmg songs still mean a lot to me and I think they will forever. mostly I think the whole thing was a catalyst for me thinking differently about my relationship to the music and jd as a figure, and that thinking has been through many subsequent evolutions which can to some extent be tracked backwards through my tmg tag. thanks for asking, and again, I have no expectation that anyone else will change their position based on my experience.
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Tag game: Current
got tagged by @begaydoalchemy !! thank u !!
- Current time: 9:45 (AM for you US peeps smh)
- Current activity: finished up prefarming blades traces to 6/8/8/8. double calyx drops events is a godsend. was listening to a video essay on the bg but the favorite song section made me go listen to stiny on repeat again bc i love inflicting emotional damage on myself so i guess thats what.
- Currently thinking about: so theres this person in the hsr leaks subreddit megathread doing daily renheng insanity ponderings since blades trailer dropped and ive been just losing my mind ever since reading them. anyway i wanted everyone here to get to see them too but didnt wanna repost em bc its just kinda ehhhh to do so. here u go!! suffer with me!!! click the links theres all 3!!! (spoilery warning tho. idr how many leaks refs there are in there exactly but expect some at least)
- Current favorite song: spotify most listened to top5 currently looking like NEON by raon, kissaki by reol, wildfire, cha cha cha (we will never forgive xx swedes watch out) and stiny from KALUSH & jerry heil.
but like let me be clear the only reason reol isnt number 1 is bc the full version of the song only came out like 2 weeks ago and the earlier released shorter anime ver of kissaki is literally 7th on the list.
- Currently reading: ...i mean mostly just renheng fanfic but uhhh. i did read where the crawdads sing from delia owens (just plucked it out from the bookshelf randomly bc i was bored) a month or so back. it was neat but no like particular strong feelings abt it. it was very well written and i liked the flow of the prose a lot. also waiting for crooked kingdom to get a finnish translation bc i got six of crows in finnish and i dont do book series as mixed language sets generally. (also the translation work itself was just like an absolute fucking banger with the imagery and metaphors used like chef kiss)
- Currently watching: no particular show (last thing was when i rewatched fmab a couple months ago) going on but like. random video essays or informative stuff on yt honestly and its mostly for bg noise.
- Current favorite character: gee i wonder. dan heng (past editions included), blade, (big gap here bc i tunnel vision on characters), bailu, luocha, jing yuan i think for specific ones from hsr for now. am looking out for jingliu and fu xuan too i need to study them. in genshin its like. yeah its mr childe ajax tartaglia all the way but i kinda just havent been feeling it for the game much so eh. tighnari, kazuha up there too n arlecchino obvi.
- Current WIPS: what kind of productive person do you take me for??? ig i like. opened word this week to type out some random passage drafts for a ficlet type thing relating to the post i made a while back abt belobogs temperatures wrt dan hengs potential terrible, horrible, no good, very bad scalie time with it but do Not expect any results from that or anything i s2g. ive finished one fic in my life and that was half poetry half madness full one sitting and be done with it type deal
im sorry i have no idea who to tag so like. anyone who wants to do it feel free, mutuals or followers!!! :]
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Falling Duet
Word Count: 2.4k
Category: Fluff but it’s so 🥺
Warning: Nothing
Request: harry dating singer!reader: he has to perform at some awards and he invites her to sing with him but no one else knows? love your writing🤧❤
Summary: You and Harry sing an unreleased version of Falling at an award show.
The lyrics used are of “Falling (other POV)” by THE cutie, Ally Naso 🤍
// masterlist //
**reposted bc tumblr is messing up the tags & nobody can view it. sigh.
..
It all started when a friend of yours had recorded you singing in your school’s bathroom during senior year.
7 years ago, you wouldn’t have believed it if somebody told you that you would be a 13-time Grammy nominated artist, as well as having 6 of that very award sitting on your shelf at your childhood home – one for Best Artist, and one for Album of the year.
You would have laughed even.
But it wasn’t a joke nor was it a dream you wished to never wake up from; it was as real as life could be.
You were successful in the industry and if any of your fans were asked, they would say that it was because of your immense talent and unproblematic, empathetic, kind character.
It was one of the many reasons why so many people on the internet had shipped you with a certain English man, him having been only 20 when you went viral and got signed.
A year into the industry, it was one day when you remember your Twitter notifications going crazy;
“HARRY STYLES JUST SAID HE LOVES YOUR MUSIC AND THINKS YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL”
“omg pls tell us you watched 1d’s interview with jimmy kimmel”
“IT’S FINALLY HAPPENING! CAN YOU PLEASE BE TOGETHER ALREADY???”
Looking back at that memory, you remember how you were a shaking and overwhelmed mess as you had clicked on the link everybody was sending you.
The video had begun with the audience cheering as the camera was on Jimmy and the 5 men near him.
And there he sat; in a black suit with a white shirt underneath, medium-length hair looking like he had run his fingers through many times, his hands clasped as he looked at Jimmy.
“Who’s most likely to let a woman split the band?” Jimmy had asked.
They had looked at each other, not answering for a moment before Niall chimed in with a laugh as he pointed at Harry, “Harry would let his celebrity crush do that.”
Harry rolled his eyes jokingly as his bandmates agreed and laughed, slapping his hands against his thighs in feigned annoyance.
“Who is that? Who’s your celebrity crush?”
“Just this talented person.” He had tried to smile his way through the question, but no one was having it.
“You know Y/N Y/L/N? She’s an amazing singer,” Louis told Jimmy.
“Y/N!” Jimmy beamed, “We had her on the show two weeks ago.”
“Yeah, he watched that.” Liam had gestured towards Harry.
Hiding his face in his hands for a moment, the audience cheered as his friends continued to laugh.
“She’s amazing, isn’t she?” Jimmy asked Harry in a teasing manner.
Having had decided to get it over with, Harry nodded as he clasped his hands together again, “She’s very talented and beautiful.”
“Lovie, can you help me with the necklace? My nails are still drying.”
You looked up from your place on the couch, sitting in your long dress looking so beautiful that Harry had lost track of time of getting into his own suit because he was too busy giving you a photoshoot on his phone.
Standing up, you reached and clasped his necklace for him, dusting his shoulders to signal that you were done.
Turning, you were met with your boyfriend of 4 years beaming at you before he leaned to press his lips against yours.
“You look so good.” You smiled up at him, “So beautiful.”
“Have to try to catch up with how you look tonight,” he replied with a wide smile, “Nervous?”
“Not really.” You admitted.
Amusingly and completely and utterly in love, Harry tilted his head slightly, “Any reason why you’re not? You usually hate those.”
It was true. You didn’t really like award shows because of how tiresome all the process was; hair, makeup, dressing up, walking only to pause every second, the repeated questions you have been answering for years, how more judgmental the world was on nights like these.
But it was always when Harry was able to be by your side that you liked the night, and the tall man knew it, but he had always loved hearing you say it.
To feed his ego, you wrapped your arms around his neck, “Because you’ll be there.”
“Music to my ears.” He joked, shaking his head slightly.
“Just feeding that already overfed ego of yours, baby.”
“Excuse you.” He pecked your lips, “Let me add food for Evie then we can leave.”
“I’ll do it, don’t mess up your nails.” You patted his chest before moving away to attend to your cat.
The fans and reporters all had anticipated the moment of yours and boyfriend’s arrival, and the both of you knew it.
You were fairly private with your relationship. While everyone knew you were together, the both of you didn’t always post about one another but when you did, it went viral – something you and Harry, shamelessly, enjoyed.
It was why during moments like this, everyone was eager. Reporters were hungry for content, all having different intentions, but you spend enough time in the industry and you sort of begin knowing what to say and how to say it.
Harry was scheduled to perform, something everyone knew of, but it was the fact that you were joining him not on the red carpet, but on stage that they didn’t.
Getting out of the car together, the screams and flashing lights were then doubled.
Harry closed the door behind you with a polite smile to the security standing. Bending a little, he adjusted your dress’s short train for you as you looked back at it before you looked up at him.
As if they weren’t snapping pictures like crazy yet, you reached and fixed Harry’s hair at the front, his eyes looking up with a smile as you did so.
“Thanks, love.”
With that, Harry placed his arm around your waist as you walked to the first spot on the red carpet.
“When was the last time we appeared together? They’re going mad.” You whispered, looking at Harry as he smiled to the cameras.
He chuckled, looking at you, “I think we deprive them too much.”
“Let’s give them enough content to last a year.”
Nobody but the both of you knew what you meant, and it was why the flashing lights and camera shutter sounds were then tripled the moment Harry’s lips were on yours in a soft kiss.
“Can we sign stuff?” You asked a woman standing on the sides, “Can we see the fans?”
When she nodded at you, you and Harry ignored posing for a few minutes to converse and meet fans.
“I love you and Harry so much!” One fan said shakily as you signed a paper for him.
“Thank yo- Hey! I saw you in Amsterdam last year, right?” You grinned.
And that was another thing not only your fans loved about you, but Harry, too.
You were no stranger to connections. You were no stranger to making people feel seen and treating them in a way that no fan expected to be treated – a friend, and you remember friends.
“Harry, do you think Y/N will win Songwriter of the Year?” A fan asked.
Harry shrugged with a smile, “I hope so but we all know she is anyway.” He waved his hand with a joking manner, making the closest fans laugh.
“What about you? Do you think you’ll win Artist of the Year?”
“I don’t know,” he smiled, “There are so many amazing artists. I wish them all the best.”
“He’s a humble man,” you teased, patting his shoulder, “We all know he is anyway.”
You were confused as they, Harry included, laughed in shock. “What?”
“He literally has just said the same thing about you.”
You laughed, looking at Harry, “Shut up, no way!”
“The both of you have been doing that for years.” One fan commented with a grin, “It’s adorable. It’s like telepathy or something.”
“Oh yeah, we are telepathic,” Harry nodded, “It gets a little scary sometimes.”
“Heeey!” You laughed, “It’s actually helpful. One of us would be just walking at home and we’d look at each other and know that the other just means something like “feed Evie” or “take out the trash””
“This is so cute!”
“Harry, what are you performing tonight?”
“You’ll find out in a bit.” He pointed.
Shortly, you and Harry had to take more pictures and do interviews before you were escorted inside.
It was the little moments that fans also lived for; how Harry held your hand as you sat so discreetly, how the both of you chatted and giggled among one another and those around you, how Harry fist-bumped the air the moment your name was called to receive your award of Songwriter of the Year before kissing you. It was how they knew this was real – how love wasn’t something you only listen people sing about or write novels for.
It was in how Harry’s eyes didn’t move from you as you gave your speech, a wide smile on his face and eyes resembling twinkling stars for crying out loud.
It was in how you ended your speech with: “This is to the man who has inspired and pushed me forward to write every single day. I love you.”
It was in how you looked more nervous than Harry himself when his category was called before you were the first to get out of your seat with a happy “yes!” once they announced that he won.
It was in how Harry cupped your face that moment to kiss you before walking to receive his award.
It was in how you remained standing, those behind you only smiling instead of being annoyed, with your hands clutched together against your heart, tearful eyes, and the brightest smile in the room.
“You’re going to tell me this is cheesy,” Harry chuckled slightly, giving a shrug as he looked at you, “But I wouldn’t be standing here, holding this, if it weren’t for you. I love you, too.”
But then Harry was about to perform and you weren’t in your seat.
The award show had decided to make a skit of it, the host being Miley had held her microphone as she stood in the empty isle beside yours and Harry’s empty seats.
“We know Harry Styles is performing in minutes,” she said, looking at the camera with a playful smile, “But where is Y/N Y/L/N? We know, we know,” she nodded, “Probably backstage for some extra good luck but-” people laughed, causing Miley to pause and chuckle, “But seriously, guys. There’s a show and it must go on.”
“It’s going on.” Harry said from backstage into his mic before the stage went dark.
It wasn’t until piano tunes sounded that the arena grew dim, a spotlight on the piano at the center of the stage where you sat, your fingers gentle against the keys as you played the beginning notes of Falling.
“I'm in my bed,
And you're not here
And there's no one to blame
But the drink in my wandering hands.” Harry sang as he came on stage, holding the mic in his hand before taking a seat beside you.
Everyone had expected him to sing the next verse, but it wasn’t his voice that they then heard.
“I'm in my bed
Instead of yours
Cried to sleep turned off all of lights and locked all of the doors.” You sang, eyes on the piano keys.
“Forget what I said
It's not what I meant
And I can't take it back
I can't unpack the baggage you left.” His eyes were on you, body turned slightly towards you as he felt like the both of you were in your living room in front of your white piano.
“I replay what you said
Don’t know if it’s true
Left with two broken hearts and there’s nothing that we could undo.” You sang, closing your eyes as you got ready for the chorus.
“What am I now? What am I now?
What if I'm someone I don't want around?
I'm falling again, I'm falling again, I'm falling.”
“What am I now? What am I now?
Don’t want to cry ‘cause I can’t stand the sound
I'm falling again, I'm falling again, I'm falling.”
The both of you sang together, your voice being softer and quieter than Harry’s.
“What if I'm down?
What if I'm out?
What if I'm someone you won't talk about?
I'm falling again, I'm falling again, I'm falling.”
“What if I'm down? What if I'm out?
What if you’re someone I can’t live without?
I'm falling again, I'm falling again, I'm falling.”
It was a version nobody had heard before, and it was why everyone was quiet, the only sound coming from you, Harry, and your lone instrument.
It was something you had written together following a rough patch of your relationship, and everyone knew that it was more personal with the way the both of you sang.
When his eyes weren’t closed, Harry sang as he looked at you, and he knew that performing this song meant more to the both of you than anyone could imagine. One look at your face and Harry knew you were reliving the night of when the both of you had written this; eyes a little red from crying, bodies hot, Harry wearing a hoodie of yours while you sat in your underwear with his purple fluffy robe on.
“Can I do this alone without ever needing you again?”
“And I get the feeling that you'll never need me again.”
You both sang the bridge together, yours being shorter than Harry’s note as you carried a softer tone, closing your eyes as you played the piano, feeling your throat close up before gulping.
He knew.
It was why the final chorus was sung softer and quieter, Harry’s forehead resting against your temple for a moment as the both of you sang.
“I’m falling again, I’m falling again, I’m falling.” Harry finished, putting his mic down as he stared at you with a small smile, watching you in your element as you played.
Managing to look at him as you played single soft notes, you sang, “I’m falling again, I’m falling again, I’m falling.”
You played the end single notes, looking at Harry with tearful eyes and a bashful smile.
It was like you were unaware to the erupted cheer and round of applause, you threw your arms around Harry, feeling his arms wrap around you instantly.
Crying from the overwhelming emotions, you were thankful your mascara was waterproof. You called it.
“I love you,” Harry whispered in your ear, “I love you so much.”
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A Work Of Art (m)
“In our life there is a single color, as on an artist’s palette, which provides the meaning of life and art. It is the color of love.” - Marc Chagall
➺ Banner: The lovely @dee-ehn 💕
➺ Pairing: Jimin x Female Reader
➺ Genre: PWP, Smut, Slightest Angst
➺ Rating: 18+
➺ Word Count: 7.3k
➺ Summary: You surprise Jimin with his Filter outfit; and then some.
➺ Warnings: tongues get tired in this fic, dom!jimin, we talk about spit, some biting, jimin loves praise, lingerie n stuff, nipple play, oral sex (m&f receiving), we talk more about spit, some bondage is involved, degrading names, blindfolds, spanking (maybe too much, don’t look @ me), light choking, light face-fucking, cum eating, we talk even more about spit, hickeys galore, some edging?, unprotected sex (don’t do it kids, not even for Jimin)
➺ Author’s Note: (repost bc tags, you know how it is) huge s/o to @ilikemesometaetaes for making time to beta read this monstrosity 💜 thank youuuu! Also thanks to @honeiibeehobi, @kithtaehyung for helping me with the many many details & @ppersonnafor hyping up this idea or else it would have never seen the light of day ;_;
lol i will come back to edit this cuz this didnt let me focus on my paper due tonight so if you see a spelling mistake or tense error umm no you didnt 👀
do let me know your thoughts!! the smallest feedback goes a long way! 💛💛
This is the first part of my Dress Down series, find more at it’s masterlist!
Y/N: soooooo, I did a thing.
JM: is the dishwasher flooding our kitchen again?
Y/N: -_- i’ll give you two more guesses.
JM: oh no. you picked up a dog from the street again.
Y/N: come onn!!
JM: y/n, last time you picked one up, HE HAD AN OWNER
Y/N: you’re down to your last try, or else i’m taking this off.
JM: …
JM: so its something you have on? 😏
Y/N: pic_210124.jpg
JM: holy shit
JM: wait wait fuck
JM: keep the door unlocked.
“You like?”
The bob in his Adam’s apple wordlessly conveys the answer you’re looking for.
A crisp, white, button down shirt, tucked into black trousers, topped off with a panama hat that matches your top half is the view Jimin comes home to. Your dress pays homage to Jimin’s Filter outfit - actually, the exact one - the one that showcased his immaculate dance moves, the one that exposes his delicious collarbones, the one that brings the irresistible urge to bite your way up his neck - the one he eventually rids.
If you had to pick a color, he is a flustered orange, bright and blushing, turned on by the indecent implication of your very decent outfit.
You’re on the counter, one leg crossed over the other, accentuating the swell of your ass. Landing on the pads of your feet, you take a few steps towards the man with the unhinged jaw.
“Babe.” a mellow croak - Jimin can’t get a whole sentence out without saliva pooling and obstructing his speech. “You, in my clothes… fuck.”
Chuckling at his very obvious loss of words, you give him a twirl, allowing him to fully soak in your outfit.
“Was waiting for you.”
Three long strides and you were in his arms, a pair of lips desperate to invade your space and claim you. An Angel on your shoulder tells you to give in; after all, this is the end result - what you both want.
However, the Devil on the other side, no no no. It wants you to make him suffer. To get revenge for all the times you were taken control of. It remembers all the days he turned you on with shoot photographs and all the nights he brought you to the brink only to stop you from tipping over with a cocky smirk and a cheeky wink.
The Devil was created from the moments when you thought you would actually erupt, begging for release, only to be shoved aside with a single growl of ‘don’t you fucking dare.’
Your desire to please him effectively silenced the Devil and kept it at bay. But no more. All those times built up and gave your Devil the power to force its way against your will to restrain it, causing it to rise to the surface.
You will have the upper hand.
So you push him away, keeping him at an arm’s length for your safety to have him on his toes. Forlorn eyes meet your steely ones, and you physically stop yourself from giving in to his puppy gaze - those eyes can turn icy and sultry when nailing you into the bed like his rent depended on it.
“Sit there. I have a-” You turn to switch on some music, “-small present for you.”
“If the small present isn’t me folding you in half and fucking you till sunrise,” He sits with visible reluctance, irises slowly transforming into magma orbs, “I don’t want it.”
“Well, we’ll see… Depends on how you behave.”
On a normal day, this comment would have lit your ass on fire, pronto.
Today isn’t a normal day at all.
You stride on, every noiseless step you take leaving a wreckage of nerves behind, ignoring the smoldering gaze he has locked on you- you are unsure whether he is deciding your punishment or simply admiring how his clothes fit on your body.
You stand on the side, drinking him in.
From your viewpoint, this is ridiculous. Those cursed jeans, vacuumed onto his thighs, ensure your eyes don’t miss a single ridge. His legs are spread out, beckoning you to have a seat, and the Angel once again begs for some reprieve. He knows what he’s doing; knows you inside and out- knows you couldn’t miss a chance to ride him like this. The wicked smirk flashing back at you is confirmation.
But you stymy that thought at its root. Walking behind, you wrap your arms around him to faintly buss his cheek.
“Sooo I was watching Filter…”
Jimin hums against your feeble touch. He wants more. The soft wind of your breath routing through his jeweled ear sends a wave of goosebumps down his spine. From behind, you run your hands over his sinewy biceps, taut in restraint - holding themselves back against the suffering you are putting him through.
“You do know how fucking hot you looked, right?” You playfully let your tongue toy with the hanging ornament, the briefest of flicks causing Jimin’s shoulders to push back, trying to connect with your bosom.
With a crooked finger under his jaw, you bring him to meet your eyes- eyes that are adorned with layered shadows of deep maroons, a variety of colors blending into your skin tone, eyelashes piqued up and ready to reach the clouds.
“So pretty…” He whispers out as you place your hat on its rightful throne - Jimin’s head.
A lone digit traces the lines of art you etched for him, appreciating every single stroke you put in to make a memorable time. Warm merigold rays bloom in your chest in response to his gaze, with him looking at you like you invented the sky. Pupils are dilated, and the only reason you can see each other is because of the practically nonexistent distance between you.
His eyes pick up on your tapering resolve to keep him in line. A light quiver of need passing your lips as you hopelessly vie for dominance is what most likely gives you away.
Grabbing you by the neck, he pulls you into a deep kiss, plunging his tongue into you with reckless abandon like he was a nomad all this while and your mouth has finally claimed him home. Your neck strains at the awkward angle and surely even his is hurting, but the pressure of his hand is unrelenting.
His tongue searches and searches, desperately looking for a part in you he has not yet explored. You’d think the years of togetherness would have diminished this fiery attraction but no, he comes onto you like he has a mission to prove - to validate his love for you, to plead you to be his. You would happily accept this shower of affection, returning it with due interest.
With great difficulty you part, a string of spit still connecting your lips because he has not let you move far enough. “Uh-uh. Be good.” You pout a little, breaking character.
“You’re here. In my clothes. A walking dream. How the fuck am I to be good?” He pulls you back in to continue what you cut short but you break the line of spit and his intention with a hand wedged between your faces.
“I asked you a question, Mister.” Back on your cocky nature, you graze your lips against oh-so-lightly, barely giving him anything to feel, but the tingling on his skin shows he can feel it all.
The adoration moves into a competition, “You tell me, sweetness - how did I look?”
It’s always the praise. He loves it when you struggle to tell him his dick was crafted by the heavens when you’re choking on it, but he still makes you do it. You stutter and stumble your words when his lips smack against your cunt, devouvering and digging for the treasure of your cum, but he forces you to tell him. When you sit on his dick, your brain has no sense of diction or direction, only chasing the high at his mercy, but he makes you scream it out loud, letting everyone beyond the pearly gates know, between moans and wails, that only he can break you down this way.
“This shirt, sweetie.” Your nose trails the path between his collar and the ends of his hair, basking in the sweet vanilla scent, “You’re all covered. Why, pray tell,” You dig your teeth into the point where his shoulder meets his neck, “does this sole patch of skin turn me on so bad?”
He sucks in an inhale through his clenched teeth, his stunning visage devoid of any virtue. His head is thrown back, hat toppling over in the movement and giving you a larger canvas to mark, an opportunity you happily grasp. The mellifluous tones he is producing is recorded in your mind for lonelier nights to come.
“And the red suit? Fuck, your corseted waist?” At the corner of your eye you see his fingers clenching into a fist, your lush voice making it harder and harder for him to breathe.
You slowly stride forward, painfully slow, letting him notice every single muscle of your body curving to his unspoken command, undoing one button at a time until your torso is revealed- and shows the true purpose of your scarlet eye makeup.
A deep burgundy camisole, ribbed at the waist to accentuate the way your hips flow has Jimin salivating to no end. The strappy number, with carmine ribbons flowing into your yet to be removed bottom half- a deed Jimin intends on rectifying very, very soon- calls to him sinfully. The lingerie twists and ties in incomprehensible ways, but the amount of cleavage it gives you is ungodly.
If they weren’t already, Jimin’s eyes are now wide open.
Time comes to a standstill as he checks out your whole figure, taking in every embroidered pattern on the lingerie and every embellishment on your breasts. Before, you were already a five-star meal, but now? An emperor’s feast.
The little flower right on top of your nipple has Jimin’s attention. His thumb comes up to trace the bedecked rose, following the stitched line of stem that takes him to the peak, then drawing over petal by petal. Each time he reaches close to your hardened nub, he abstains from crossing over it, making your nipple hardens imperceptibly under the presentiment of any relief and the disappointment when nothing arrives. His other hand, sitting on your waist, coaxes you to straddle him while he plays gardner on your bust.
“Jimin…” Your nipple, finally finding solace under his thumb, is not faring too well under the attention. Your plan of teasing him is slipping through your fingers like sand.
“Tell me baby, what do you want?” His finger is now tracing the seams of your lingerie cups, admiring the way they frame your ample bosom. Things are progressing too slow for your liking, and you come clean with your ignoble intentions.
“Please, I just want to suck you off.”
A wad of spit lands directly into your cleavage, followed by two thick fingers penetrating the lubed entrance.
“Nope.” His fingers continue to shallowly fuck your cleavage. Neither of you are being touched in the erogenous zone, but why does it feel so good? Your valley is inundated with his dribble, coating your ensemble and shifting shades to a deep cerise. Every pump of his nimble fingers between your breasts is like a promise of what your pussy is going to go through. Will he fuck you hard and fast with your voice echoing across the room, making every neighbor privy of your sexual escapedes? Will he be slow and gentle, penetrate you with utmost care, soft gasps and whines only sounded to the two of you? You can never guess.
In the aphrodisiac moment, you forgot that you were supposed to take charge.
“Please, please, please! I did so much,” You take the guilt route. If Jimin was anything, he was a just and fair man. “Can’t I get that much?”
Jimin’s gaze has not left your wet cleavage. A flit of his eye makes contact with yours and goes back to the fucking - that is enough language for you to understand his needs. You bend low, and spit out a fat glob onto your chest to add to the mess he has already made. The groan that leaves him is ungodly, and he licks the spit you unloaded onto yourself, spreading it all over your expensive wear. He slurps like you released sweetened water to a parched traveller, your bosom holding all the sweetness to itself.
Gathering your thoughts is more difficult than you could ever imagine. The cloth over your nipples is completely soaked, bitten into and sticking to your skin thanks to the vacuum Jimin pulled on them. Your back has had a workout, every vertebrae bent to its maximum possibility. Chiropractors are so last year, you just have your boyfriend ravish your breasts.
“Once I’m done, you can do whatever you want.”
All of your five brain cells had to be put in action to form that sentence. The moment the words left your lips, the pressure your breasts were on had been released, but you could still feel lips against you, stretching into a snarky smirk.
“Whatever?” His grip on your waist tightens, seating you more firmly onto his taut thighs.
Whatever. That stupidly amazing word.
“Saying ‘whatever’ always lands you in trouble. Have you forgotten?” His damp lips are tracing your collarbones, nibbles whenever he felt appropriate. How does he expect you to form a damned sentence like this, the Devil on your shoulder indignantly asks. The Angel on the other has gone back in time to fetch memories filed under the term ‘whatever’, strictly saved for your quality alone-time.
The first time you told him to do ‘whatever he wants’ was fairly early into your relationship. Sex was as vanilla as the ice cream tastebud-less people liked, and none of you ever pushed it too far. A happy, drunken night with a loose-lipped confession from him.
“God, the things I want to do to you…” he had muffled into your hair, maybe not even intended for your ears to pick up.
A cheeky giggle had bubbled out of your tipsy self. “Like what, tie me up?”
If Jimin then were a color, he was a pantone pink. Blushed cheeks from the alcohol and the realization that you had caught him, airbrushed with a depth you weren’t able to put in place that early in the relationship. Wide-eyed horror was shown in its place, possibly exaggerated to add to the denial he had landed himself in.
“No no, of course, I don’t mean it like that, what ar-”
“Why not?”
The animal that awoke after confirming with you fifteen times was a force to be reckoned with. Your bra had turned into rope, wrists bound behind as he roughly squished your helpless cheeks.
“You will tell me when to stop, right?” His tongue peeked lightly, brushing your top lip, taking the perspiration away.
“Uhmf-yufh!”
“God, you’re gonna regret this baby.”
But it was exactly the opposite. You got the railing of a lifetime, heard the filthiest words that could leave the lips of such a courteous man - a side you had not expected at all. You couldn’t possibly recollect every single move he made, but what you can recollect with excruciating detail is every feeling you felt that night. It was filled with lust, with revelations of the new ways your body could bend, a night of puppetry where Jimin played you like the master your body craved. The following day was Jimin taking care of you, big puppy eyes wondering whether he took it too far. In his daze of letting go of control, he couldn’t take in your lidded stare, heaving with satisfaction - so you made sure he could witness them when he took you the next time that morning.
The other time the wretched word was mentioned was during an argument. You’re not jealous of Jimin on stage - it’s his career and you were one of the girls offering one of their kidneys to be able to catch a glimpse of him.
But your workspace? That’s where you draw the line.
She was a random worker. Some third-floor low-lying soul. You were eighth-floor premium material (the floors didn’t decide shit, but no one can tell you what skyscraper semantics you can craft in your brain). A lifeless party that even Jimin’s colorful locks couldn’t color up.
This random worker was very enamored by Jimin (as she should, the man is a whole nine-course meal). Supportive fans are not what get you jealous either.
But the limit is when placed her scrawny fingers on Jimin’s hand, drawing the glass in his grip to her lips and took a sip from it. If her lashes were fanned they could blow a man away (which is probably more than what her puny mouth could possibly do). The fume exiting your ears could have been in bright red for all you care, because every office member had been rightfully annoyed.
The whole car ride back was filled with your drunken blabbers about the different ways you could skin her. The actual victim beside you was not making a nearly big enough deal out of it, intending to let you get rid of your temper.
“She fucking knew!” Your normally clean disposition had taken its leave after the fuming temper took real estate in your brain, and you aimlessly threw your heel at some corner of the house - hungover self shall have to deal with this angry mess you’ve made. Wait, you’re an angry mess too.. “The gall she had, I should jus-”
You march towards the door, in hopes of what, you don’t know. But if you didn’t take action you’ll probably explode. Any action, just anything. You never find out though, because a strong arm slithered around your waist and halted your expedition.
“Calm down, feisty. Where are you going now?” His soothing voice, punctuated with a mocking chuckle almost quelled the fire in you. Almost.
But you’re not done being an idiot.
“To go find her for you. You’d fuck the living daylights out of her, right?”
The loudest silence you have ever encountered. Jimin’s grip on your waist tightened to the point where it could have hurt. Like he was trying to push every iota of that thought out of your body. From behind, you can hear a deep breath dragging, and somewhere in your irate head you knew you had struck a nerve, a bad one. Jimin is forced to expel any anger bubbling in him, trying to use reason with an unreasonable recipient.
“Princess, you don’t actually think I’d do that right?”
“I don’t know!” Your misplaced anger had reached the rooftops. Jimin had done nothing wrong here except try to calm an increasingly livid girlfriend. “Maybe you’d love that. Her itty-bitty waist, that whore’s outfit she had on. You call me a whore right? Maybe she’s more worthy of you!”
“Y/N.”
The timbre of his voice had completely changed. The breathy, airy aura had completely departed from your name he had just called. The lack of nicknames raised some hair at the nape of your neck, but you’re a stubborn one.
“Ugh, I don’t care.”
You tried to walk back to your room, head still reeling in a palace of inferno, burning everything that dares to intrude your path - but somehow, you had been pushed to a wall, and the eyes of the man you loved had turned feral.
If Jimin was a color, he was green - igniting with fury, anger repressed in dark shadows that never made the light of the day until pushed - but you pushed all right. And now released from its shackles, it has surrounded you and slammed you against the wall - and you have nowhere to go.
“You’re my whore. Is that a complaint from my stupid, stupid whore?”
The only joint you’re free to move is your neck, and your gratuitous self decided to rebel with whatever degree of freedom you have. Turning your face away to not meet his seething eyes, you continue your rebel-without-a-cause tantrum.
“Whatever.” you carped out.
Again, with that stupid word, you had signed your fate for the night.
Usually, you can express your feelings. Be it pain or pleasure (sometimes the two packed in one), you could wail it out to the heavens and respite would follow.
Usually, you can see the torments laid out on you. Jimin’s lithe body performing every obscene spell he invoked is a treat for your eyes. He treats your body like an artisan, using any medium to paint his art on you.
But that day, you were stripped of them both, and made to realize what a privilege they were.
Mouth stuffed with your bunched up panties, eyes blinded by his tie of the evening, you could only rely on the sensors on your skin to somehow predict what was going to be done to you. And you failed. Every single time. Every thwack fell on a new area. Every teasing touch tickled you at a new place. Nothing could begin to prepare you for his next move and you couldn’t keep up with his tameless pace.
He made you beg through the makeshift gag, beg to let you come, then beg to stop coming, beg for every orifice of yours to be filled by his seed and then beg to get cleaned by him. With the first rays of morning sunlight, language was an illusion, time was an out-of-reach concept, and all you knew was the worshipping of last night.
Whatever is a word. Whatever is mean. Whatever is filthy. Whatever is nailing you into the bed and rendering you immobile for the entire day. Whatever may just be a word to anyone, but to you it is what has you losing sense of reality, giving in to a phantasm of your wildest dreams.
A wet tap on your cheek brings you back from you imagining the past - the fingers that were fucking your cleavage are squishing your cheeks, bringing your attention back from all your dirty memories to the present - to create another memory to add to your folder.
If Jimin is a color, he is the darkest of all blacks. This is where everything pious comes to meet its sordid end. His sultry gaze is reading your eyes, searching for where you got lost, which shared memories of passed time made you melt into the puddle that you are right now.
“I said, don’t you remember? ‘Whatever’?”
Let’s see. You don’t have work tomorrow. You don’t have any commitments. You don’t have to meet anyone.
So there is no reason for you to be able to move.
“Hmmmmn, I don’t seem to recall - you could remind me.”
Dark, dark chuckles from such a cherubic face. You flounder off his lap to shuck your (his) pants away, revealing the matching maroon garter belt set. The whole outfit is an ode to Jimin’s mid performance transformation, the one that made many people’s hearts skip a quick beat. His slim, cinched waist, the flared pants flowing down his frame were one for the books, and you’d like to think your rendition has its place too.
Giving him a quick spin, you attempt to get down to business - but Jimin pulls you back on his lap. Without the pants, you can feel it - his hard, thick cock straining against the tough jean fabric and still making its presence known.
“Tell me more, baby. What did you like?”
The man was a sucker for your praise.
You were a sucker for the whole man.
But the sucking will probably have to wait.
“I loved your expressions. You’re so sexy on stage, fuck. Going around and giving bedroom eyes to the world.”
His hand gripping you ass gives it a quick pinch, but voice just let out a lazy hum to get you to continue.
“The choreography,”, your whisper is strained, “you dance like you fuck baby. So sensual, so sexy.”
You lick a stripe up his neck, from his artistic collarbones to the back of his ear, the sensitive spot that makes him hiss is arousal. You stay there, wanting to whisper the next few lines. The world didn’t need to know your thirst for this.
“You know my favorite part?”
“Oh, tell me.” His voice is hitting lower and lower in pitch, much like it’s hitting you lower and lower in your body.
You place the hand framing his face on his neck - the same one you want to cover in blooms of purple and red, lightly squeezing, letting him preen under the pressure. The tightness has Jimin’s head falling back on the headrest, and you can feel his pulse hastening to accommodate for the lacking oxygen in his stream.
Letting go of his throat, and pleased to see the lightest indentation on his beautiful pale skin, you snake your hands downward.
“Na, na, na,” Inching slowly towards your end goal, you whisper the tune into his ear, “na na na, na, na na”, covering every part with an indulgent languish, “pick your filter”.
Your hand finally reaches its destination - you grab his bulge and squeeze the hardness, making Jimin buck his hips against your palm.
“Namaneul damabwa.”
It’s a low whisper from his lips, but even in the gravelly sound you can hear how melodious he is, how the song rolls off of his tongue and was made for his vocal color. The whisper is laced with lust, with want, with desire, all the feelings you portrayed for him in his performance.
That, and in life in general.
You shuffle and sit to the side, simultaneously unbuttoning his jeans to get him some relief for the ache he had going on. Finally, you acquiesce and free his dick from its cages.
Every time you see him is a wonder to you. Hard, ridged, the right amount of veins to stimulate the walls of your cunt. Head leaking from the eons of teasing you’ve been doing, right from the text you sent to seconds ago. You bend down to clean him up, tasting the saltiness of his seed that has coated the head. Jimin’s lips are facing the brunt of your deeds - his teeth have found near permanent residence in its plushness, digging deep to keep from moaning too early, from giving you the pleasure. He is going to make you work.
Well, you must get to work.
Slowly, slowly, you dip your head in further, sucking lightly with each move, tongue tracing every vein on his dick. As you move your head back up, Jimin’s hand pushes into your back, making it arch further, and then you go down on his dick. His finger lightly follows the curve of your back, from your upper back all the way to the band of your lace panties.
Hooking a finger underneath the lace fabric of your panty that had disappeared in between your mounds of flesh, he pulls at it - hard. Your throat revolts against the intrusion as you gag, and the fabric presses into your clit. The concentrated abrasion turns into pleasure - he uses it to arch your back further, and bring your ass closer so that he can-
Smack!
The spank sends you forward and you choke on his dick further, throat giving in to his hardness.
“So good for me baby. Look at that ass.” He grabs one cheek, bubbled with the way your panties are now, squeezing and testing the firmness of your glutes.
Your plans of torturing him are shot; the Devil on your shoulder is strangely mute. Awakening the brat, you slip a hand under and toy with his balls, pulling back to provide your throat some recess. Your saliva mixed with his precum is an gushing mess, glistening on his balls and now coating your palms as you play with light squeezes - the existing stiffness caused by your teasing arousal mixed with your playful fingers make Jimin buck into your mouth, releasing a delicious groan in the process.
A second spank is a warning, either you increase your pace or reap some serious consequences. You consider the consequences; they are very compelling. You could end with delicious marks of ownership from this delicious man. But he deserves the best suck of his life, and you’re going to do just that.
Hollowing your mouth, you go further down, till his head is poking an uninvaded point in your throat, and Jimin lets out a surprising note. A groan, no, a roar, but a tinge of whine mixed in it, like the pleasure is too much for him.
You continue to swallow around, hand pumping the length you couldn’t take in, interlarded with swipes on his tight balls, leaving Jimin to be a heaving mess. Your ass is not faring better, bearing the brunt of his replies. You’re positive his fingerprints are imprinted on your asscheek, and one sit on his phone can unlock it. The line of your panties is drenched with your sopping wetness and lodged between the lips.
“God, I’m so close baby, just a little more.”
You would fervently nod in acceptance to whatever demand he places; in this position, he could ask you for the world and you would have it at his disposal. But what stops you are his ringed fingers lodged in your hair, pushing you in further, determined to spill deep in your throat, to the point where you don’t even have to swallow to get everything down.
“Fuck, such a good girl for me.” Jimin appraises how deep he is going, how your throat is accommodating him and quivering around his length. Bunching your hair up into a makeshift ponytail, he stops them from obstructing his vision - the view of you struggling to take him in, toiling to keep the need to breathe at bay while you tend to his needs, worshipping his dick like its the last meal you’ll ever get - your desperate adulation takes him over the brink.
Jimin erupts into your mouth; an ungodly amount at that. It is the hardest he’s come in a while, and given your lifestyle, that’s saying something. Even a cum-hungry whore like you can’t possibly swallow that much in one go, and you are forced to let the globs dribble down his now-softening member. The two of you are heaving, catching a breath - completely different circumstances but the same result.
The way you’re looking at him right now; his dick is already twitching to go for a second lap. Dilated pupils staring back, like you were at the receiving end of the orgasm - you are staring at him like he hung every star in the sky. Strings of cum are leaking out of the corners of your lips, ones he really wants to lap up with his tongue. Instead, you daintily dab it away - as innocent as pecking stray drops of ice cream off your mouth.
You look at him with teasing eyes. “Want a taste baby?”
Running your tongue along the mess you (or he) made, you gather the remnant cum that didn’t go into you, and instead flooded his groin. Straddling back onto his lap, you go in for a kiss but stop halfway.
Jimin is looking, waiting with lust hungry eyes. Slightly pained by the pause, he whines.
“What?”
“Open your mouth.”
From a height, you let his cum and your spit drop into his mouth, a groan of satisfaction emanating as Jimin’s tongue accepts it with great delight. He tastes his juices, they somehow feel sweeter coming from your mouth. He pushes the glob you dropped on his tongue against the roof of his mouth, letting every taste bud bathe in relish. When he’s sucked all flavor out of the globule he swallows it. On opening his eyes and landing back from heaven to earth, he sees you admiring his adam’s apple, the way it bobbed when he swallowed your offering.
Jimin’s eyes trace your current state; you look beautiful. The strappy red lingerie wet from Jimin’s treatment perfectly showcases your peaked nipples, ready for another round of torture. His shirt, through all this has managed to stay hanging on your shoulders. The curves of your sinful waist accentuated by the ribbons of the wear, like roads down a windy path, every ribbon vanishing into their destination, between your curvaceous thighs.
Slipping his fingers under the band, he decides he has not played with the lingerie enough, tugging it up once again - a sharp inhale and you’re moving along with it, upward to balance between the point of pain and pleasure. Jimin makes sure you don’t tip in favor of one. Grabbing you by the neck, Jimin harshly pulls you down into a deep kiss.
He’s done waiting, done watching you take the reins. His tongue tells you that you now can only react to his doings. Deepening the kiss, you let your mind walk places. Back to his performance, his stage presence, the aura he exudes when he is in his element. His sinful body melding to the flow of the beat, like the music was made to his movement - his piercing gaze that could leave an insentient camera with blushed cheeks - but a sharp bite pulls you right back to the present to remind you that this is also Jimin in his complete element. Pillowy lips, incandescent with every brush, sucked and nipped with fervor. But it still didn’t satisfy. It wasn’t nearly enough. Starved, you wanted to scream at every imperceptible air pocket between the two of you - as if you knew in your soul they were guilty of keeping you away.
Jimin pulls away, and his words shut you down before the whine leaves you.
“About that ‘whatever’…” his sinister eyes are a window to his brain churning something unimaginable to close the night - sinister in uppercase. Make it bold. Underline that shit. That’s him.
In the bat of an eye, you are face down on the sofa - Jimin’s rock hard thighs are straddling you, making sure you can handle his weight. In all the coarseness, he takes care of the smallest of things. An untimely smile creeps up on your face at the thought, the tender show of affection amidst the rough push and pull affecting your immersion, but you can’t say you don’t like it.
Feeling a rough jerk on your shoulder, you try to look back, just in time to receive Jimin’s ravenous gaze; he looks at you like he will eat you alive, and by the end of the night you plan on having just that. Pulling back your now-unbuttoned shirt and bunching its ends, he anchors you to the position of his choice by tying your hands behind.
Smelling a line up your neck all the way up to your hair, he briefly pauses to ask “Okay?”
Your tiny nod is enough for Jimin to carry on with whatever godless plan he has chalked out for you.
“I hope you had your fun. Because I’m not going easy on you.”
Light banter could cause no trouble. Atleast, not more than you already have. “When have you ever?”
Flashbacks of the blossoming days of your relationship flicker in Jimin’s mind, their fugacious presence a telling sign of how long it has been. Looking downward, he can only thank his alcohol-induced blabbering of that night as that is the reason he can enjoy the view he has right now.
“Maybe I should take it easy?” His tongue flits across your neck, too soft for your liking, torturous like his liking.
His fingers are playing with the straps and your now exposed upper back. It’s always been a favorite place of his. The whole expanse looks resplendent when he is done tasting you. Maroon and purple florets on your beautiful, glowing skin. And then you purposely wear dresses to show it all off, to show who your heart belongs to. He loves that about you.
You gyrate lightly, snapping him out of his daze, begging him to take you hard and fast. “Jimin, please.” a low drawl leaves you as you try to not slobber all over the cushion.
Jimin shifts lower to straddle your thighs. Snaking his hand between your legs, he finds your clit and plays with it, every press releasing a different sound from different depths of your throat. A particularly low grunt appears when he slips two fingers into your channel with smooth ease, and pushes you up from the inside.
“Ass up for me.”
His fingers stay lodged inside as you raise your hips to obey him, pulling you up further and further till he is satisfied with your position. God, your pussy looks wrecked. With every pump of his fingers you gush our more liquid, and Jimin gathers the escaping drops on this tongue.
“So perfect for me, this hole.” You can feel the cold metal of his rings drawing circles inside you as he prepares you to take his cock. His tongue, drawing completely different characters is too slow for your liking - he seems to be more satisfied in drinking your cum dripping from his fingers instead of paying attention to your throbbing clit. Seconds go by, several hinting moans of dissatisfaction go by, but the Devil on your shoulder seems to have returned and is asking for more. A hip raise, that’s all. His tongue will be right where you want.
What you got instead was a sharp bite on your already battered ass - Devil, hey, where did you go? “Behave.” He grunts against your pussy, and a fresh wave of arousal escapes you with a third finger making its way in. “Don’t like it? Too,” Smack! “Fucking.” Smack! “Bad.”
The last spank hit you hard, leaving your cunt soaked to the core. He is trying to get a rise out of you, and you are falling for it. Your smarting skin is at its breaking point, but let’s not pretend like you don’t want this either.
“Baby please, I’m so close.” You’re close to tears with how long you’ve been this turned on. Maybe Jimin will have a change of heart seeing you like this.
“Don’t.”
Well maybe not.
He’s using your hole like playdough - for his fancy, with no end goal in sight. He doesn’t seem to want you to come anytime soon and it is bothering you to no end. The tightening coil in your belly is almost painful at this point - but he doesn’t seem to want to let up anytime soon.
“You taste so sweet baby, almost don’t want to let you come, so you keep dripping like this.”
His fingers curl into you to hit that spot, and God, you’re seeing stars right now. Curling up your fists into a ball and trying to keep the threatening tsunami at bay, you jerk into his mouth and continue to sway to the tune his fingers play inside you. If desperation had a poster girl, they could take your photo right now.
“If you let me come I -ohhh- I will- I will give you more.” Your words are broken, every push into your cunt halting your flow of speech.
A split second later you are empty. He’s pulled away from you, and you think the finger-fucking torture you were going through was almost better than this. Your walls flutter in empty anguish.
“Better keep your promise then.” Finally, you hear Jimin shuffling behind, but your muscles feel too alive and too dead at the same time. At crossroads, you are unable to get yourself to move, to twist or turn and witness the glory of him, the scrunch of his features, the grit of his pronounced jaw, his lips heaving a sigh as he pushes his girthy self into your leaking hole.
Jimin’s forehead is lined with sweat, jaws hurting from the tight clench he had trying to not nut into you too soon. Now they revolt in pain, ready to pass on their trouble to his dick and release into you the moment he fits himself in. But he held off; he had plans for you - long plans.
As he slowly pulls himself out, you can’t help but mewl at the pleasure your walls are feeling, with every ridge of his cock pressing all the right spots inside you, the snug fit when he’s pulled out all the way only leaving the head inside you. Then, you can’t help but yell, expressing a mixture of anguish and pleasure when his hips snap to push into you in one swoop, hitting deep inside you. With your ass high up in the air, his balls smack your engorged bud, sending shockwaves throughout your body and clenching the hold you have on his dick.
“Fuck baby, you feel fucking tight. You’re so close?” Jimin’s voice is strained as well; the lack of mocking in his tone tells you he is close as well.
“Ki-Kiss me, please.” The voice that leaves you is so foreign, so unknown. The fucked out woman speaking in your stance has no spatial or temporal comprehension. You don’t even realize how you are put on your back, now a lucky witness to Jimin’s nimble figure pushing back into you as he leaned over to slot his lips on yours.
The kiss was explicit, it was rough, it would put to any kiss you’ve shared before to shame. Deep in throes of pleasure, his mouth is chasing yours. Your hands are still bound; a light fight against the restrain tells you you don’t have a chance. Instead, you suck his plush lip in, swiping your tongue across his cherry petals that are rushing with blood because of you. Dormant volcanoes across the world could erupt with the blaze of your merging lips, it is scorching hot.
If Jimin is a color, he is a rich wine - deep and passionate. He puts his one hundred percent into whatever he does, be it skilled singing, adept dancing or simply fervent kissing. He gives it his all.
Jimin’s skillful hips move in every way he wishes - and your pussy is thankful for that. Rolling in deep, he tests the stretch of your walls, before pistoning into you with zeroed-in precision, sole focus to get you to come with him. The effort he was putting in could be seen in his abs - they have tightened with exertion, and with a light sheen on sweat, look absolutely delectable.
Letting your hands roam, you bring Jimin’s face into your neck where you can hear every single breath, every hiss, every groan - that you could record and keep in your memory. With one hand tugging his tresses, and the other hand drawing paths on his back with your nails, you hear the sounds you want to. Jimin sharply bites your ear, and the shockwaves of pleasure send you tipping.
There’s layers to the pleasure you are experiencing right now, your orgasm hitting you in ebbs and flows. Right when you think you can finally return back to ground, the high tide pulls you back into the water for another stream of pleasure. It feels like eternity when you finally hit the land, and even then the loose sand makes you falter, threatens to send you back into the ocean.
Jimin’s pace is faltering, and he spills soon after. Hot, heavy breaths tickle under your ear, as both of you feel the sheer intensity of the orgasm. Him on you, your hearts are aligned, and you can feel the beats fighting each other for dominance until they soften down.
Ripples of energy flow out of the both of you, elevating the temperature around the two of you. If you didn’t have your eyes closed you’d say literal rolls of steam are emanating from the way you both are heaving. You slowly regain your senses, twitching hands trying to remember what it is that hands even do.
A shiver runs through your spine when you hear a grunt so close to your ear, only to realize Jimin is in the same position as you are in. Even without looking, you can guess what his expression is. Void of any edge, the softness of his facial features must have made their return, with crinkled eyes and a light frown on his beautiful pouty lips, he probably looks like an innocent caricature of the man that stood behind you moments ago. Letting your palm rest on his head, you beckon him to get up.
If Jimin is a color, he is the pinkness best portrayed by his puffy cheeks at this moment. A childlike glow, a guileless visage. He looks at you with such adoration, like you are the only desire in his world, and everything else can be damned.
You don’t want to break this silence but you cheekily add, “You didn’t even get me naked. Like this a bit too much eh?”
Dark clouds mar the pink and turn it into a deep, sultry carmine - the shift in his color noticeably brings your temperature down by a few degrees.
“Cute. You think I’m done with you.”
He is the whole palette, and you can pick your filter.
Thank you for making it to the end! Let me know what you think! And you can find more of my writing at my masterlist here!
#bangtansorciere#bangtanhq#bangtancentralstation#ficswithluv#bangtaninn#bts smut#jimin smut#park jimin smut#bts fanfic#jimin fanfic#bangtanuniversity
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cuffing season /// Ushijima x f!Reader (18+)
Summary: [Shiratorizawa fanweek day 5—Firsts] You convince your boyfriend to try something new in the bedroom, but as it turns out, old habits die hard.
A/N: Heard it was Shiratorizawa week 👀 technically I did originally post this on day 5, but I had to repost bc of tag issues, whoops :P Let’s pray it works this time!! edit: apparently it’s still not listed in the tags :<
The song that I mention is Bruno Major’s Old Fashioned (although it doesn’t fit the tone of this fic in the least).
Tags/warnings: mild bondage, size kink, rough sex!!!, marking (bruises/hickeys/etc.), power play/power exchange, reader tries & fails to dom Mr. Ushijima 😳, all characters are adults
Look, Ushijima’s a great boyfriend. Perfect, almost. Sure, he may not be the most expressive guy, but you’ve been dating him long enough that you’re able to pick up on the little gestures that tell you that he cares about you—the way he presses his face into your hair when you hug him after you’ve been apart for a while; his hands stroking circles into your skin when you fall asleep in bed next to him; all of it. He’s everything you could possibly look for in a man, except for one not-so-little issue:
The sex.
Because Ushijima, your sweet, wonderful boyfriend, who kisses you so gently it’s like he thinks you’ll fall apart if he’s not infinitely careful with you, is for some reason incapable of exercising the same degree of restraint (or any restraint at all) when you’re in bed together. When it comes to sex, your boyfriend is a fucking animal. And you’re not really sure how much more you can handle.
Maybe your concerns would seem petty from an outsider’s perspective. It’s not like Ushijima doesn’t take ‘no’ for an answer, and it’s not like you don’t want to have sex. You’re attracted to him, of course you are! Almost 76 inches and 190 pounds of pure muscle, a body that looks like Michelangelo could have carved it from marble, and that beautifully solemn expression that had you salivating over him from the stands before you even knew his name? You want to have sex with him, you’re just fairly certain you can’t, not when it always ends up with you completely and utterly wrecked, so spent you don’t even have the strength to lift your hips off the mattress so he can wipe his cum off your thighs.
Look, anyone in your position would feel the same way. It’s awful and you’ll never admit it to him, but you almost broke up with him after the first time you two fucked. You knew going in that it wouldn’t be easy—the man radiates big dick energy and boy did he deliver—but it was just too much.
That first time had started off so innocuously, with you inviting him to your place for a nightcap after your sixth date. You’d set candles and put on your romantic sex playlist for a nice backdrop to let him hold you in his lap and make out—how the hell had you gone from that to having him rut you into the mattress, your belly pressed into the sheets and ass arched up so he could pound into you so forcefully that your rickety bed smacked into the wall hard enough to rattle the furniture with every movement, and you couldn’t even hear it over the sound of your own moaning? You hadn’t changed the playlist, and it felt downright obscene to listen to Bruno Major croon about love and courtship while Ushijima fucked into you like he was trying to carve the shape of his cock into your pussy.
You’d had to call in sick the next day because you could barely walk. The bruises from where he held your hips had taken weeks to fade, and by that time he’d already given you new ones. To his credit, Ushijima felt bad when he saw the evidence of how rough he’d been and he promised to take it easy on you next time…but after a few more rounds of mind-numbingly savage sex you learned that the man apparently doesn’t know what ‘take it easy’ means.
To be fair, at least some of it is your fault. You really shouldn’t have offered to go on the pill as a three-month anniversary present to him. At least before, he had to give you a break while he changed condoms after he came; now he has no reason to hesitate, instead going for round two (and sometimes round three) without pulling out. You never thought you’d see superhuman stamina as a bad thing, but…
“You don’t get it! It’s like getting fucked by a stallion. I need to plan to have three days to recover whenever I take him home with me,” you whined to your friends over cocktails when they told you you shouldn’t complain about a good thing—after all, Ushijima is just as committed to your pleasure as he is to his own, and there’s never been an occasion where he didn’t get you off before fucking you himself (probably at least a little because there’s no way in hell you’d be relaxed enough to take him otherwise).
“Can’t you just tell him to go slower?” one of your friends asked. “If he doesn’t listen to you, then that’s fucked up and you need to dump him.”
“It’s not that he doesn’t listen. If I tell him to stop, he stops,” you sighed, stirring your drink with the straw and watching the decorative sprig of mint fall under the surface to be overtaken by a chip of ice. “It’s like he can’t go slower. He’s not adjustable—it’s either crazy brutal or nothing, and then neither of us get what we want. Like a vibrator you can’t turn off the highest level. I don’t even think he realizes in the moment how intense it is for me.”
“Aren’t you ever on top? You can set the pace.”
“I’ve tried, but Ushi just—“ you made a gripping motion with your hands and mimicked raising something up and setting it down vigorously— “like, bounces me.”
One of them raised an eyebrow and then her eyes widened. She turned to your other friend and the two of them whispered to each other for a bit, then shifted back to you. “Tie him up,” she said with the air of an elder imparting sage knowledge, and your other friend nodded.
“Oh, come on.” You rolled your eyes.
“I’m serious. Guys usually love it when girls are in control, you just need to take the initiative. Get him tied down and then you can show him exactly how you like it. Let him feel like he’s at your mercy for once.”
The idea had seemed unthinkable at the time, but you hadn’t been able to forget it—which is why after weeks of contemplation, hours of research, and a single extremely awkward trip to a sex shop, you’re now crouching over Ushijima’s naked chest, wrapping a leather cuff around one of his wrists.
“Are you sure that this is something you want to do?” Ushijima asks in that weighty baritone that makes you shiver with need. He doesn’t pull away, but he eyes your actions warily as you thread the chain of the cuffs around a rung in the center of your headboard and reach over to do the other side.
“…Yes,” you tell him, a little less firmly than you would have liked, and you lick your lips to try to make up for how suddenly dry your mouth is. “Anyway, isn’t that my line? We don’t have to do the cuffs if you don’t want to. I won’t force you.”
“It’s alright. You and I both know you couldn’t force me, (Y/N).” Dark eyes pin you down and it’s incredibly unfair how much power he has over you even when he’s the one chained to the bed.
Ushijima’s right, obviously—if he didn’t want to be exactly where he is right now, he wouldn’t be. You’re sure as hell not strong enough to force him to do anything he doesn’t want to, but he didn’t have to say it like that.
“Okay then…good,” you reply, adjusting the straps of the cuffs to accommodate for how stupidly thick his wrists are. When you’re satisfied that they won’t chafe but he can’t get out of them without your help, you sit back next to his chest and admire your handiwork. Ushijima lays on his back, naked, relaxed, even with his arms stretched up to your headboard and cuffed there. He looks good, mouthwateringly good, and you’re ready to get your hands on him when you remember there’s something you need to get straight first. “Wait, before we—before I do anything, remember— what do you say if you want me to stop?”
“…Vanilla,” Ushijima says, reciting the safeword you decided on when you were hammering out details, although the look in his half-lidded eyes is telling you very clearly that he has no intention of needing to use it.
Privately you agree, but everything you’ve read on the kink blogs you’ve been trolling for research tells you that a responsible adult doesn’t put cuffs on their partner without deciding on a safeword first, and you’re determined to do this by the book. “Good boy,” you say, and the diminutive feels awkward in your mouth until you see Ushijima’s reaction—the flash in his eyes, a minuscule hitch in his breathing next to you, and the scrape of metal against wood as he gives a light pull at the cuffs.
With everything safe and accounted for, you give a final tug to the chain to ensure it’s secure, then inch back and swing one leg over the broad expanse of his chest so you’re straddling his abdomen (and he’s so damn big that there’s a twinge of soreness in your thighs just from sitting on top of him). Fuck, he looks good like this, all spread out and pinned underneath you, so masculine and bulky that you’re feeling your pussy get wet just from watching him watching you.
It’s not often you get to appreciate him like this—usually you’re too focused on not losing your mind from how deeply he’s fucking you—so you savor it, massaging his shoulders and sliding your fingers down his sides, tracing the smooth skin with a feather-light touch and then dipping to kiss under his jaw. Feeling more than a little devious, you let your teeth graze over the thin skin at the base of his neck and with your chest pressed into his, it’s not hard to feel his sharp intake of breath.
“The marks...my teammates will notice.”
“Maybe I should stop, then,” you murmur against his skin, lifting up just enough to brush over his nipples. He stiffens, and once again you hear him tugging at the cuffs.
“…Don’t. I want them to see,” Ushijima says, and once you have his permission you don’t waste any time in latching your mouth to his skin and sucking. It’s been ages since you’ve given anyone a hickey. Usually you’re the one marked up like a teenager after Ushijima has his way with you, so this is a nice change of pace, especially when you can feel him flexing underneath you.
Well, kissing is nice…but you’re getting impatient and you know he is too. Once you’re satisfied that your hickeys are going to show up nice and bright red around his neck like a collar, you sit back, walking your hands back on his chest, stroking over his abdomen and giving a little roll of your ass on top of him. Ushijima’s hips twitch—unconsciously, you wonder?—and he glares at you in a way that tells you in no uncertain terms to hurry up and let him fuck you.
And damn it, something about that look has you feeling weak. Needy. Obedient. But this time you’re supposed to be in charge, so you smirk and lift your hips, pulling your body back so his cock is nestled between your legs, not quite touching your pussy. He’s already hard—no surprises there, considering how intently he’s watching you as you mess with him—but you only take a second to stroke his cock up and down before shifting up so he can see you slick your fingers up in your own pussy.
“(Y/N)…” Ushijima’s voice is low, annoyed, and he looks hungry. But you’re so amazed at how wet you are under your own fingers that you don’t bother to pay attention to him shifting his position under you to try to get stimulation. Your juices are literally slicking up your own thighs, just from chaining up your boyfriend and teasing him a little? You should have done this a long time ago.
You push two fingers into your pussy and pump them a few times, making sure to angle your hips so Ushijima can see them go in and out. The stretch is almost uncomfortable for a second and you wince a little before schooling your expression, knowing you’re about to have something a lot bigger than two fingers stretching you open. Ushijima catches it though, and he frowns, trying to sit up before remembering the cuffs that are holding him back. “Let me—let me do it for you—“
“No, stay down,” you say quickly, using your other hand to push him back into the mattress while you continue to touch yourself. Ushijima lets you (and there’s no doubt in your mind that he is letting you), but his eyes narrow as he zeroes in on the way your fingers are glistening with your own pussy juices.
God, you’re—you’re supposed to be in control, aren’t you? So then you shouldn’t be feeling like this, eyes drifting closed as you fuck yourself on your fingers, letting your lower knuckles rub against your clit while you try to curl them to rub against your g-spot. Ushijima’s been spoiling you…you can’t remember the last time you’ve had to do this yourself, and as you feel the tension building up slowly you catch yourself wishing it were him fingering you instead.
His fingers are just so thick. And long, and so rough. You bite your lip thinking about the way he does it when he preps you to take his cock, mashing his palm into your clit, petting along inside you and scissoring his fingers and… “Mmh,” you hum, holding back a real moan for Ushijima’s sake.
There’s another click of the chain sliding over the headboard wood and it reminds you that he’s right there, you could just uncuff him and he could touch you and fill you up with those thick fingers, make you cum, make you cry. But the urge to seek your own pleasure is outweighed by the image he’s making as he looks at you, his expression almost angry in its intensity now that he’s watching you do this to yourself and he has no way to get his hands on you.
“Ahh—“ you whine, letting a real whimper out at the thought of what you’re doing to him. “Ushi, Ushi, do you wanna touch? Wanna touch me?”
His head ducks into a hasty nod and his jaw clenches at the strain of having to ask for what he wants instead of just taking it like usual.
The longer you touch yourself, the closer you’re getting…but you don’t want to cum, not just yet. You draw your fingers out of your dripping cunt and open them up in a V, showing off the juices that connect them, the evidence of how wet you are for him. “Mmm, I don’t think so. I think there’s something else I want in me instead.”
And then you’re reaching to the side for the lube, squeezing a healthy dollop into your palm and then wrapping your hand around Ushiijma’s cock. And—fuck, he’s big. Sure, you’ve had sex with him plenty, but no matter how often you take him, you never stop feeling absolutely torn up after. A tingle of trepidation races up your spine at the thought of riding him like this—can you even put it in by yourself?
Even just looking at it is intimidating. He’s painfully hard, cock flushed red and bobbing up against his lower stomach every time you let it go, and, Jesus, how is it even possible that this thing would fit inside you? When you wrap your hand around him your fingers don’t touch; he must be thicker around than your own wrist.
Halfway. That’ll going to be your goal tonight, to take him halfway. And even that…is going to be a stretch.
The anxiety must show on your face because once again you’ve got Ushijima straining at the cuffs. “(Y/N)—“ he spits as you stroke him up, nudging your palm against the tip. “(Y/N), you need to finish first. Let me make you cum.”
“No, this time I want to—I’m gonna cum on your cock,” you say, adjusting your position so you’re kneeling above him, the head of his cock sliding between your lips. “Gonna cum on your big cock, Ushi, okay?”
His cock jumps in your hand at the provocation. He’s glaring at you, but he’s also leaking precum, the sticky fluid mixing with the lubricant. You give Ushijima a moment to say the safeword if he really doesn’t want you to, and when he stays quiet you raise yourself up a little more and line the head of his cock up with your weeping slit. You hold your pussy lips open with your fingers, easing your thighs down and pressing the head into you and—
“Oh—oh—oh, fuck, oh fuck, Ushi—“ you stutter out helplessly.
It’s been almost two weeks since he last fucked you. One week, six days and about three hours, and at the moment this measure of time seems unreasonably important because it’s been almost two weeks since you last let Ushijima split you in half with his ridiculously huge cock.
You’re not ready, should’ve prepped more, should’ve let him make you cum like he said—fuck, it feels like you’re losing your virginity—and the mixture of dismay and relief that spills over you when the thick swell of his head pushes past that tight ring of muscle is almost nauseating.
The tip? Seriously, just the fucking tip, and you’re already delirious, shaking, your thighs quivering on either side of his. It’s taking all of your strength to keep from going slack—but you know if you do, his whole cock is going to slide up into you and even thinking about that has your cunt clenching and unclenching around what you’re able to fit inside.
“Do you need help?” Despite the strain in Ushijima’s voice at being teased like this, there’s an undercurrent of amusement. He clearly doesn’t have faith in your ability to take him deeper by yourself.
It’s this—this quiet arrogance, this belief that he knows what’s best for you and he’s the only one who can give it to you—that gives you the guts to convince yourself to lower yourself down onto his his cock until you’re literally gasping for air. It fucking hurts, but you’re not going to give him the satisfaction of hearing you say it; instead, you brace your hands against the stiff muscle of his chest and try to focus on the way his cockhead is pressing into your g-spot.
Halfway…he’s gotta be at least halfway in, right? You sneak a glance up at him and bite back a curse at the look on his face, serious as ever, so focused on the place where your pussy is reluctantly eating up his cock that you feel your insides tense up around him again.
You don’t even know how it’s possible for you to get tighter around him but somehow you must be able to, because you hear Ushijima grunt underneath you, and his muscles contract under your palms as he tries again to sit up. When he can’t, he hisses in frustration. “Move…now. Or I won’t be able to control myself.”
Funny, aren’t you supposed to be the one controlling him? But it sure as hell doesn’t feel that way when you’re barely able to stay upright just from trying to ride his cock. You nod desperately, chin jutting up and down like a bobblehead, and lift your hips up off his cock until just the tip is left inside. When you push yourself back down you can’t help whimpering at the feeling of him stretching you, sliding up into you, that stiff, wet cockhead dragging over your g-spot.
By now the pain has faded into an uncomfortable stretch, like leaning too heavily into a foreign pose in yoga, enough that you’re able to feel the arousal building in the pit of your belly and hold onto it as you rock your hips up and down him. The pace is slow—almost too slow; you marvel at yourself for wanting it faster—and there’s a fair amount of Ushijima’s cock that you’re not able to take, but this is really all you can handle.
“Mmm, Ushi, fuck, you’re so big, so big and hard inside me, feels so good on your cock—“ you moan, knowing you sound less like the dominant partner in this position and more like you’re teasing him, pushing his limits.
Ushijima’s breathing is heavy. Labored. He’s trying to hold himself back. “(Y/N), deeper—take me deeper, now.”
Part of your brain vaguely recognizes that he isn’t supposed to be giving the orders here, but you’re too drunk on the feeling of fucking yourself on his cock to complain, so you lower your hips and try, but it feels like you’re just too weak to do it yourself. “Ushi please, it’s too much, too big, I can’t, please—“
And your pleading must sound like an invitation, because his eyes flash and you feel him shifting the position of his legs behind you—and then he bucks his hips up and his cock sinks into your cunt, pushing up into your gooey insides until the head is pressing into the tight opening of your cervix.
“Ahn—?” you squeal, startled. What? He—what? Fuck, it’s deep, it’s so deep, you can’t hold yourself up so you flop downward, holding onto his shoulders for dear life, “ohhh Ushi pleasepleaseplease” and you barely hear yourself over the lubed-up slap of his pelvis against your skin.
Fuck, it feels like he’s knocking the breath out of you. Feels like you can’t fucking breathe like his cock isn’t just pushing against your stomach but your lungs too, can’t breathe so you bear down on his shoulders try to hold yourself up try to let yourself adjust but—
Ushijima’s in control now.
Not that he ever wasn’t, you’d think if you were capable of thinking except you’re not because as you try to situate yourself make yourself relax around that monster cock filling you up, he’s not giving you a moment to catch your breath, instead thrusting up into you at his usual breakneck pace. Apparently he doesn’t need to use his hands to make you bounce—you’re not even moving yourself now, just trying to hold still as his hips slam his cock inside you again and again and again, and again, rubbing up against that sweet spot in your pussy so quickly that you think you might go crazy from it.
“Nngh, so tight,” he growls, and you can tell from the way the words are choked out that he’s gritting his teeth. You almost want to roll your eyes—of course you’re tight, anyone would feel tight around him—but it feels like if you do your eyes might roll back in your head so you don’t.
Jesus fuck, you can’t even understand how long it’s been but you do know that it’s absurd for you to want to cum already, only the thick mass of his cock pushing into you is somehow hitting all the right buttons, just like it always does. Even if it’s rough you want more. By now you’re trying to meet his thrusts, rolling your hips in time with him fucking you open, doing your best to participate but really it’s all you can do to even stay still with how roughly he’s fucking you. “Ushi, fuck, so deep, wanna cum I wanna cum please let me cum—“
“Touch yourself,” he commands breathlessly because he’s still tied to the headboard and he can’t do it, and you barely have the strength to pick one of your hands up off of where you’re scratching into his shoulder and pull it down to rub at your clit.
It’s not enough and you whimper desperately, you don’t want your own fingers, you want Ushijima’s, you want him to touch you. You’re probably saying it out loud by now, begging him to put his hands on you—his eyes widen and then the sound of the metal cuff chain grating over wood reaches you—you can see the skin of his wrists get lighter from lack of blood flow, he’s pulling at the cuffs, pulling too hard, he’s going to hurt himself, you have to stop him—and then you hear a snap.
Aw, shit. The bed.
The thought comes in a singular moment of clarity as you watch the rung Ushijima’s chained to separate itself from the rest of the headboard, splintering, the nail that held it in place looking pathetically flimsy next to the veins bulging in his arms as he slides the chain away from it. He flexes his hands, forming fists and then unclenching them to restore the interrupted blood flow, and then you’ve only got a second to prepare yourself before he’s upright, dragging your hips up to meet his.
“Ushi, Ushi, Ushi, I want, please, I want you,” you beg, but you didn’t really have to because you’re pretty sure there’s no force on Earth that could stop him from holding you up so he can fuck down into you with a ferocity that could be mistaken for anger if you weren’t certain it was really lust.
The entire bed is creaking and rocking against the force of his movement, but you don’t really have the headspace to worry about more property damage considering he’s got you supporting yourself on the mattress on your back and shoulders, your spine curled up so he can kneel and still have your hips aligned with his, your legs dangling bonelessly on either side of him.
Fuck. Holy fuck. You open your mouth but words don’t come out, only a choked whimper, but if you could speak you’d be saying yesyesyesyesyes, touch me.
Despite your inability to speak, Ushijima picks up on what you need and then along with his cock carving its way in and out of you you’re getting the feeling of his fingers padding over your clit. Rough and callused, not gentle, nothing like the way you touched yourself earlier, but you’re starting to realize you don’t mind the aggression. In fact, it’s good, it’s so good, so good you’re gonna cum.
You’re gonna cum.
A long, drawn-out whine is spilling out of your lips before you can stop it; you wrap your hand over your own mouth out of shame or maybe courtesy to your neighbors (although by now they’ve probably invested in earplugs after listening to you squeal like a pig on Ushijima’s cock dozens of times in the past). Still, as your climax rocks through you shove your thumb between your teeth to bite down on it, but the sharp pain is nothing compared to the pleasure.
“Ushiiiii—“ you sob around your own fingers. Your spine arches—or rather, you try to arch your back but you can’t, not with Ushijima’s full body weight pressing into you and keeping you pinned to the mattress.
It hurts, it feels good, you’re seeing stars, you’re hearing Ushijima snarl as your pussy tightens up and convulses on his cock. His one-handed grip on your ass gets painfully tight as he abandons whatever pretense of restraint he had left and pumps his cock into you so hard and fast you’re pretty sure the headboard isn’t going to be the only thing broken, but you don’t fucking care because you’re cumming, you’re cumming, you’re cumming so hard you think you black out for a second, holy fuck.
It’s only when you hear Ushijima’s panting breath and feel him pulling your hand away from your mouth that you regain your grip on reality. “You’re bleeding,” he says, holding your hand up and inspecting the shallow indentations your teeth made on your thumb.
“…You broke my bed,” you reply tiredly once you’ve gotten in a lungful of air, what feels like the first full breath you’ve been able to take since he put his cock inside you.
“I’m sorry,” Ushijima tells you, although he doesn’t look particularly sorry.
You roll your eyes. “Did you cum?”
“Yes. When you did.” Without him holding you up there’s nothing to prevent you from sliding down off his softening (but still unfairly impressive) cock. You’re certainly not strong enough to keep yourself in position.
Even if he hadn’t confirmed it, you’d still be able to feel the familiar heat of his semen plastering your insides, and once your still-sensitive pussy is exposed to the cool air your inner muscles squeeze involuntarily but hard enough to force some of his cum out—you sense it, hot and thick, dripping out of your pussy to smear against your thighs. “Can we take a bath?” you ask, knowing you’ll barely be able to walk over to the bathroom, much less stand under the shower unassisted.
Ushijima nods and moves off the bed. “I can carry you,” he adds when you try to stand up and your knees almost give out before you flop back onto the mattress.
At this angle, with you sitting and him standing in front, it’s difficult not to see that despite cumming literally less than two minutes ago, he’s already getting stiff again. Jesus, is he even human? After how hard you just came, the thought of letting him fuck you again is giving you something stronger than butterflies, but you look up at him and offer anyway. “Wait, do you…um, want to go for another round?”
Ushijima’s gaze meets yours and then travels over your body underneath him. You must look like a mess—sweaty, hair all fucked up and tangled, body still shaking with the aftershocks of your climax and barely able to sit comfortably on your aching pussy—and you guess he sees how jittery (nervous?) you feel because for the first time since your relationship started, he shakes his head to turn down an offer of sex. “No, I’ll take care of it. Let’s clean up first.”
“Okay,” you sigh, releasing a breath you didn’t realize you were holding and raising your arms to let him pick you up.
“(Y/N).”
When Ushijima doesn’t move to carry you, you frown. “Hm?”
“The cuffs.”
Oh, right. The black leather is wrapped around both of his wrists, chain still intact. Apparently these cuffs are stronger than your headboard. Good quality. Too bad they’re going in the trash. You make quick work of the release and then undo the straps carefully, massaging over the light pink marks on your boyfriend’s wrists once they’re free.
“Sorry, did it hurt you? I didn’t mean to—I mean, I just wanted…” You trail off, feeling infinitely embarrassed that despite all your claims of dominating him, he still ended up with the upper hand, cuffs or no cuffs. And you liked submitting to him. There’s no denying that.
“It didn’t. And…I enjoyed having you on top,” Ushijima tells you, lifting you effortlessly into a princess-carry now that his arms are free.
“Yeah right. We’re never using those again,” you scoff, tucking your head into his chest as he carries you to the bathroom. “My boss is going to get mad that I keep taking sick days every time I have sex with you. I’m just going to throw the cuffs out.”
From your position, so close to him, you can barely see the upward quirk of his mouth that would be as good as laughter for anyone else. “Don’t get rid of them. I think…next time, I would like to have you wearing them, (Y/N).”
Well, fuck.
#ushijima x reader#ushijima wakatoshi x reader#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu imagines#hq x reader#ShiratorizawaFanweek2020#haikyuu#haikyuu!!#hq#hq!!#ushijima#ushijima wakatoshi#ushiwaka#ushiwaka x reader#haikyuu!! x reader#hq imagines#haikyuu!! imagines
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bakugo as your boyfriend would include...
request: what would dating bakugo be like?
gn!reader (but there are slight fem themes if you squint); fluff; headcanons; no spoilers
character: bakugo katsuki
a/n: this goes out to my one & only <333. ilysm deku kinnie pls enjoy! also, @ bakugo simps i hope this feeds u well. he’s sm fun to write for. headcanons + a short playlist are under the cut.
*ty to my bakugo kinnie/simp friend for helping me write this. i appreciate u. A LOT of these ideas r hers!!
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FALLING IN LOVE WITH HIM SOUNDS LIKE:
01. TEENAGE DIRTBAG by WHEATUS
02. GUTTER GIRL by HFHW
03. BOYFREN by LOVE LEO
04. IN TOO DEEP by SUM 41
05. TOUNGES by THE FRIGHTS
06. R U MINE? by ARCTIC MONKEYS
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katsuki is a very emotional person. he feels incredibly deep and profound things, but has trouble expressing it in a healthy manner. this being so, him as your s/o would consist of a lot of subtle displays of affection! such as...
-> SHOWING YOU HOW TO DO STUFF:
he’ll teach you small things about his hobbies. will 100% show you how to play the drums, mountain climb, etc.
literally you learn so much with him it’s insane. he claims it’s because he couldn’t stand dating an incapable person, but in reality it’s just because he likes feeling useful/needed HAHA.
-> TOUCHING YOU:
this man is lowkey super clingy...so he will always find a way to be physically close to you.
a BIG fan of putting his arm around your shoulder fs. don’t mention it to him though because he’ll IMMEDIATELY stop doing it.
-> LETTING YOU SIT ON HIS LAP:
if you’re comfortable with it, he’d adore it if you sat on his lap!! like fr if you walked up to him when he was lounging on the couch and did it this is how it would go...
“what’re you doing?”
“sitting down, why?”
he just stares and then grunts before going back to whatever he was doing
don’t let his indifference fool you, he is very pleased.
probably looked up at the ceiling and thought about it for an hour once you left
he thinks about you a lot
-> ALWAYS COOKING FOR YOU:
he pretends like it’s a nuisance, but it genuinely makes his day when you eat the stuff he prepares. literally if you’re hungry just ask him to make you smth and he’ll do it. he actually gets angry if you decide to cook without him.
one time, katsuki seemed really tired because of training and school. so you tried to make something for the both of you guys to enjoy together. it uh...didn’t go well...
“what are you doing?!”
“cutting vegetables...”
“no. you’re doing it all wrong. give me the knife.”
“excuse me??”
“GIVE ME THE KNIFE.”
you ended up giving him the knife
the meal was great!?? but he scolded you for like 30 minutes after PLS.
-> SHOWING YOU OFF:
he’s proud that you’re his s/o, so of course he’s gonna brag about you to EVERYONE.
it’s not overbearing or in an annoying way either. it’s moreso him talking about your accomplishments and stuff like that.
he literally only shows you off for his own benefit. NEEDS everyone to know how cool you and him both are.
it’s an ego thing.
i take back what i said abt it not being annoying. it’s a nuisance to everyone who ain’t you.
-> SITTING NEXT TO YOU:
like i said before, he needs to be close to you at all times. sooo he always sits next to you. no questions asked.
expect to see a pouting, petty katsuki if you decide to sit next to somebody that isn’t him.
“are you seriously mad that i sat next to deku and not you on the bus?!”
“‘COURSE IM MAD.”
“you’re impossible.”
“HUH??????”
-> LETTING YOU WEAR HIS CLOTHES:
PRACTICALLY CHUCKS HIS SHIRTS AND HOODIES AT YOU. LITERALLY JUST- PELTS YOU WITH HIS CLOTHES UNTIL YOU PUT THEM ON.
you took his hoodie without asking ONE TIME and now he’s hooked on seeing you in his clothing.
he’ll always pretend like he’s doing you a favor though.
gotta love how annoying he is! 
-> GIFT GIVING
i wouldn’t go as far to say that gift giving is his love language, but he’ll buy things that you bring up in causal conversation a whole lot.
he just kinda bashfully shoves the gift in your hands and watches as you fawn over it.
“awww! how’d you know??”
“you wouldn’t shut up about it.”
he loves seeing your pleased expression!! +100 boost to katsuki’s confidence.
-> HELPING YOU WITH ACADEMICS:
we ALL know how smart this man is.
he will 100% help you study for school if you’re struggling!
don’t expect him to go easy on you though.
if anything, he’ll probably be harder on you because he really wants to see you succeed.
he basically carries you through math
-> KNOWING MUNDANE FACTS ABOUT YOU:
i can see him knowing EVERYTHING about you. your birthday, your morning routine, your favorite snacks, your favorite songs, etc.
it doesn’t take a lot for him to remember this stuff either???
like, he thinks you’re unforgettable, so he just knows
-> WANTING TO IMPRESS YOU:
he wants you to know how cool he is so bad it’s laughable.
he’ll show off during training exercises FOR SUREEEE
bakusquad teases him abt it when he does lol they ALLL know how whipped he is for you
kirishima: wow, you’re really into it today bakugo!
denki: well (y/n) IS watching
bakugo: SHUT UP.
MISC HEADCANONS!
-> you enable him so much...like way too much. please get on that. someone needs to hold this stupid man accountable. he probably likes it when you scold him despite his protests so don’t be afraid to tell him off baby.
-> your approval makes his heart go $$/!/?!!!error??77776. like, even before you two started dating, he would ALWAYS feel flustered whenever you would compliment his outfits, fighting style, etc. now that you guys are dating, he still feels extremely dazed when you dote on him.
he’ll probably act super cocky about it though
“ ‘course i look good, idiot.” 
he’s trying his best to suppress the stupid smile trying to take over his face. eventually, he lets it out, and tbh everyone in 1A knows that it’s because of smth cheesy you told him.
he is SUCH a softie for you it HURTTSSSS GAHHHH!!
-> katsuki is a very protective boyfriend.
this goes for everything, but especially applies during intense situations.
will literally lay his life down for you without thinking twice about it. don’t fight me on this. it’s canon.
if you’re going on a dangerous mission, you BEST believe this man is tagging along with you.
if for some reason he can’t go, he’ll make it a point to stay up way past his bed time waiting for you to come back.
when katsuki chooses you over sleep just know that you’ve won at life.
he doesn’t see you as inferior in any way. he knows you can handle yourself, but he really wants to keep you safe bc if something bad happened to the love of his life he would be in shambles.
on a lighter note, if mineta bugs you, he’ll absolutely wreck him. will literally punt that grape boy into the next stratosphere.
also!! he’s not the type to care about what you wear. if you’re wearing smth a bit more revealing, the most he’ll say is that you look hot. literally is so unbothered.
he trusts you a lot so it’s like 🤷♀️🤷♀️
protective ≠ possessive
-> dates w/ him are super all over the place! one weekend, you guys will just chill in his dorm and the next he’ll be laughing maniacally as he chases you down during an intense round of laser tag.
-> he’s big fan of competition, so he’ll turn everything into one.
let him win.
-> his hands are really sensitive because of his quirk, so if you kissed them he’d turn to mush.
im literally begging you to touch this man. help him. he is so touch-starved it’s not funny.
-> he runs hot so cuddles w him are so nice and comforting :(. will pull you in close and tight and NEVER let go.
in short, while dating katsuki definitely comes with it’s quirks, it’s a beautiful relationship. he respects you endlessly and will do anything to ensure your happiness. treat him right and he’ll do the same!!
have fun dating explosion boy!
*do not repost my work without proper credit and my explicit permission
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#my hero academia#anime#bakugo fluff#bakugo x you#bakugo x reader#mha headcanons#boyfriend bakugo#bakugo x y/n#bakugo katsuki#katsuki x y/n#katsuki x reader#katsuki x you#bakugo katsuki x reader#bakugo katsuki x y/n#bakugo katsuki x you#bnha#mha x reader
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i’m reposting bc it’s not showing up in the tags and I’m mad about it lmao!! hope you like it!!
check out my 800 followers event!
warnings: cursing because uh. this is bakugou katsuki. and this is so long. i put so much more effort into this than into any of the others i can’t do anything if i’m in love with him i’m sorry
Katsuki definitely did not think he would fall in love with an extra like you. In fact, he did not think he would fall in love at all.
Yet he did. Like an idiot.
You were friends with fucking Deku, of course, and almost as annoying as him. He always saw you around with him and the Half-and-Half Bastard and he promised himself he would never give you more than a glare because you simply did not deserve to be in his thoughts, and he succeeded at that
at first.
You decided to live rent-free in his mind after the Sports Festival. That was the first time he actually payed attention to you and it was safe to say he was slightly impressed
He was sure you would’ve ended up on the final battles if you hadn’t had to fight Icyhot before you got there
even then, you gave the idiot a run for his money and Katsuki was surprised with how long you held your own, getting a bunch of good hits and losing only because Todoroki was, well, Todoroki.
He respected you a bit after that
but he did not respect the way you were always plaguing his thoughts and dreams like a fucking virus of sorts
It was irritating as fuck and he wanted to kill someone over it.
Whenever he saw you his heart sped up to ten miles per minute and it made him see red with anger. He wasn’t sure what made you so important, anyway. Yes, you were powerful and somewhat pretty but still an idiot and Deku’s friend so how good could you actually be? Certainly not much
Still, there he was, thinking about you like a fucking stupid dumbass
He hated it, despised it, it made his blood boil. This was probably caused by some secondary quirk bullshit you had that no one knew about and he was tired of losing his damn time over it.
And you were always talking to him. For some god awful reason your seat was close to his and so you would ask about his day and about what he had for lunch and about his studies and a bunch of ridiculous shit he didn’t give a fuck about
“Shut the fuck up, Y/N, I don’t wanna talk to a fucking extra like you.”
“Why so grumpy, Explosion Boy?”
“I’LL KILL YOU”
he obviously didn’t.
It was weirdly comforting to have someone interested in his life, if he was honest about it.
But not much. It’s not like he liked you or appreciated you in anyway, of course not. That would be absolute bullshit and he was not willing to deal with it.
Getting kidnapped by the League of Villains was one of the worst things to ever happen to him.
Even though he fought his way through survival and didn’t get hurt or anything, it was still pretty terrible and, well, with everything that happened with All Might later... It’s safe to say it didn’t leave him feeling exactly good about himself
Besides, damn Deku was the one to help him escape and it pissed him off.
Specially because you were there too and how much of an idiot did you have to be to get caught up in something like that?
Did you want to die or something? Fucking extra. It made him so mad.
And worried, too, because what if you had gotten hurt? What if something bad had happened and he couldn’t help? Not that he cared, of course, but the thought of you being anything but healthy and fine made his heart jump uncomfortably in his chest and he didn’t like it one bit.
After that, you suddenly decided you wanted to be his friend or some bullshit, and it was the most annoying thing he had ever had to go through.
Talking to him randomly during class wasn’t fucking enough for you? Did you really have to walk with him to the dorms and invite him to have lunch with you? God, you were really insufferable.
But he found himself appreciating your company, sometimes. It was nice to have someone by his side like that, even if he couldn’t stand you
And maybe the fluttering of his heart whenever you smiled wasn’t all that bad.
You suddenly became a part of the Bakusquad after inviting him to have lunch with you multiple times and being rejected all of them until Mina started inviting YOU to have lunch with THEM instead and he wasn’t sure how to react to it
Kaminari was always fucking babbling with you about something and it got on his nerves
It was still better than seeing you running around with fucking Deku though. Deku did not deserve your friendship.
Sometimes, when you are too invested in conversation with someone else during lunch, he can’t help but steal glances at you and bite back a smile.
You’re cute when you’re excited.
He slowly stops complaining about you walking him to his dorm
You keep playfully saying you do it in case someone tries to kidnap him on the way and he screams at you for it everytime, but something tells you he goes easy on you for some reason.
There’s this one time when you call Kirishima “cheap ass red rock candy”
You’re only joking around and Kirishima knows this, so he only rolls his eyes and lightly punches your shoulder
but, for the first time ever, Katsuki laughs. He tries to hold it back like he does with every smile you bring to his lips, but he can’t, and the way your eyes sparkle at the sound sends his stomach in a frenzy
“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you laugh before,” you tell him quietly while you walk towards the dorms later that day, curiously avoiding his glare as you blush. He furrows his brows. It’s not like you to do that, but his heart does sommersaults in his chest at your bashfulness and he hates it.
“So fucking what?” his voice is aggressive, but there’s a hint of warmth rising to his face.
“It’s a nice sound,” you smile ever so softly and he stops breathing for a moment, “you should laugh more.”
“Whatever,” he mutters, hiding away his own red cheeks from your questioning eyes and walking a bit faster.
After that, he tries less to bite back his laughter. It’s almost subconscious and no one comments on it, but Kaminari, Kirishima, Mina, and Sero exchange knowing looks while you excitedly tell him about the last movie you watched and he grunts in acknowledgement, his full attention on you even as he avoids your eyes and stares at his lunch.
There’s this one time when you go to his room because you can’t sleep and it makes him so angry because he was already absolutely knocked out
yet he can see how much you’re fidgeting and something about the fact you came to him of all people causes his stomach to flutter, so he lets you in and listens while you tell him you’ve been having nightmares lately.
That’s the first time you ever sleep in his room, but neither of you acknowledge the way you’re holding each other when you wake up
It becomes kind of a tradition for you to go see him when you can’t sleep. He always complains about it and tells you to grow the fuck up, but lets you in anyway.
He likes to hold you while you sleep. It calms down his erratic heart and it’s nice, he figures. It’s nice to have someone to wait for, specially if that someone is you.
Katsuki tries not to think too much about what the feelings he gets when he’s next to you mean. After all, you’re still some annoying extra he couldn’t care less about, right?
Right?
It happens one cold night in the dorms’s common room.
You are just hanging out with him and the Bakusquad, watching some movie about something Katsuki doesn’t care about. He’s just looking through his social medias and ignoring all conversation going around him
You’re seated on the other couch, next to Sero, and he knows there’s a spot just on your other side, and a part of him longs to occupy it and be next to you, but he knows that’s stupid, so he stays put, even when you suddenly glance at him and smile when you notice how his eyes were already on you
He rolls his eyes and scowls, feeling his face heat up, but keeps quiet.
Then fucking Deku comes around and sits beside you. He’s obviously upset about something and Katsuki wants to kick his ass for simply being in close proximity to you
Yes, he knows you’re his friend too, but still. Deku can get fucked.
Deciding just being next to you isn’t enough, Izuku leans his head on your shoulder.
Katsuki sees fucking red. He’s ready to get up and punch his nose, but that was before you lifted your hand to play with the boy’s green hair, quietly asking him if everything was alright before you engaged in a whisper-filled conversation.
If looks could kill, Deku would’ve been dead in a second.
Kirishima is the first to notice how absolutely rageful he is.
“Hey, Bakubro, are you okay?”
“Shut the fuck up, Shitty Hair.”
He follows Katsuki’s glare and widens his eyes at the sight of you and Midoriya, smirking.
“Are you worried, Bakubro? Don’t worry, they’re just friends! She only has eyes for you!”
“I’m pretty sure I told you to shut up, didn’t I?”
“Come on, Bakubro! Your crush is definitely not in love with Midoriya, okay?”
“I don’t have a fucking crush, Shitty Hair!”
all eyes turn to his fuming figure after he screams. Izuku takes his head away from your shoulder, brows furrowing in confusion. You stare at Katsuki with concern, silently asking yourself what could have brought him to this outburst.
He groans in anger before standing up and leaving the room, unable to stay around you and fucking Deku any longer.
Mina sends you a look and you’re on your feet, telling Izuku you would be right back and running after the angry blond.
He was sitting on the stairs just outside the dorms, trying to control his own fury. You sit next to him and he scowls.
“What happened back there, Katsuki?” you question softly and his first name on your lips has him on the verge of an emotional breakdown. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” he groans, looking at the ground as so to avoid your sharp eyes, “I’m fine.”
“You sure?”
“Did I fucking stutter?”
You smile lightly at his manners, moving your head so you could watch him more attentively.
“Well, I heard you talk about having a crush. What about that, huh?”
He blushes immediately, scowling even harder and turning away from you so you can’t see his face, “I said I don’t have a crush, you idiot.”
You hum in acknowledgement, “that’s too bad.”
Katsuki moves his neck so fast it almost gives him whiplash, and he blushes harder when he notices how close to him you are.
“What do you fucking mean by that?”
“I wouldn’t mind you having a crush if it was on me.”
He melts on the spot, heartbeat speeding so much he can barely feel it beating.
You two stare at each other and he absolutely loves the cheeky grin on your face.
You look so pretty when you smile.
He kisses you before he can overthink it, chest fluttering at the feeling of your smile against his lips. He ends up smiling too, just a bit.
Katsuki definitely did not think he would fall in love with an extra like you. In fact, he did not think he would fall in love at all.
Yet he did, and he could begrudgingly admit it wasn’t actually that bad.
#bakugou katsuki x reader#bakugo katsuki x reader#bakugou katsuki#bakugo katsuki#bnha x reader#bnha#mha x reader#mha#bakugou x reader#nina's 800 event
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Wait For It [F.W.]
Character: Fred Weasley
Word Count: 3488
Requested?: Yes/No
Summary: ‘Death doesn't discriminate between the sinners and the saints, it takes and it takes and it takes. And we keep living anyway. We rise and we fall and we break and we make our mistakes.’ [Based on ‘Wait For It’ from the musical Hamilton].
WARNING: major character death, other character deaths
Tags: @gracemayhateyou @criminalyetminimal @angelinathebook @iprobablyshipit91 @potterverseimagine @slytherineheir @kpopgirlbtssvt @rexorangecouny @mytreec @hemmoporro @thisismysketchbook @acciotwinz @shadowsinger11 @aaannabbanana @lestersglitterglue @anyasthoughts @lxncelot @harrypotter289 @starlightweasley @slytherinsunrise @valwritesx @hufflrpuffforfred @cappsikle @kiwi-sloan @potter-redheads @pigwidgexn @twinkyjohnson @sarcasticallywitty15 @tyyyweasley @afriendlyneighborhoodhufflepuff @wonderful-writer @marauders-loving-queen @vogueweasley @marvelettesassemble @thisismynerdyself @gcdric @loony-loopy-lupinn @tinylumpiaa @locke-writes @pussytalenteditdocartwheels @ickle-ronniekins @sehunasbitch @cryingforcrystalpepsi @kashishwrites @girl-next-door-writes @susceptible-but-siriusexual @crissdanvers @whiz-bangs78 @heart-of-tempered-steel @oh-for-merlins-sake @heavenlymidnight @aylinw3asley @vivianweasley | message or send an ask to be added/removed!
Disclaimer: Gif isn't mine, credit to whoever made it
A/n: got a bit carried away with the angst... prepare your hearts guys - i cried a lot and i’m the one who wrote it. anyways lil shoutout to haley @wand3ringr0s3 bc she let me talk out this fic idea and also she’s the queen of angst fics. anyways enjoy x
~*~
PLEASE DO NOT REPOST MY WORK! REBLOGS ARE ABSOLUTELY FINE! <3
+ + + + +
Love;-
His ginger hair was illuminated by the light from the fire, his brown eyes sparkling with mischief and lips curled up into a cheeky smile - one you adored on him, one that made your heart race.
He sat beside Lee, retelling the story of one of his more outrageous pranks, waving his hands in enthusiasm as you smiled at him. You weren’t quite listening, too caught up in his voice and how passionate he was, your heart beating fast as you pulled a knee up to rest your chin on as you watched him.
The conversation moved on quickly from there, but you couldn’t bring yourself to remove your gaze from the eldest twin, moving to lean on George’s arm as you listened, but making no move to join in with them.
“I can’t wait to ask her.”
The words piqued your interest, and you almost jolted from your seat as you heard him say those words, feeling like your heart was in your throat.
Who was he talking about?
“She’s... she’s amazing. She’s smart, she’s funny. She’s fit. If she says yes to me, I’ve hit the jackpot I reckon,” Fred grinned, leaning back into the sofa. His eyes flickered over to you for just a moment and you smiled back at him absent-mindedly.
You couldn’t help it. You loved him.
Lee nudged Fred, wiggling his eyebrows at him, “When are you gonna ask her to the ball?”
Fred cleared his throat and sat up straighter, and you caught his gaze, a small - very hopeful - part of you praying he was going to ask you, and ask you at that moment.
When his gaze moved swiftly onto George, you finally looked away, staring at the fire. And though you knew, deep down, that he wasn’t talking about you, you hoped.
“Tomorrow.”
You’d wait and hope with all your heart he’d pick you.
***
You’d felt nervous all day, a ball of negative energy curling in your stomach as you wandered through your lessons aimlessly, heart clenching every time you saw Fred speaking to a girl, hoping he wasn’t asking her, yet knowing he might be.
You thought studying in the hall was going to be an easy hour, sitting by your close friends, including Angelina and Alicia, the twins and Lee sitting a little further up the benches, near Harry and Ron.
There was some mumbling, and then you heard Ron hiss, “Who’re you going with then?”
You slowly looked up, so as to not draw attention to yourself or show yourself as interested, however as you glanced over at the boys, you noticed Fred staring.
And for a moment, a small gap in time, your heart leapt as you thought he was looking at you. His brown eyes caught yours and he winked, and you felt your throat closing up, thought maybe there was a possibility of him asking you.
He threw the scrunched up ball of paper in your direction, and you held your breath, a smile curling onto your lips as the paper flew towards you. You practiced how you’d say yes to him in your head, imagined what you’d wear, how you’d do your makeup. What colour his tie would be - the same colour as your dress, you’d hope.
And then the paper sailed past your eyeline, hitting Angelina on her shoulder. Your heart sank, blood rushing through your ears as you watched Fred ask her to the ball, felt the pain in your chest growing as watched her nod.
It was one thing knowing he didn’t feel the same about you as you did about him, another to know he felt that way for someone else. More specifically, one of your closest friends.
You ripped your gaze away from them and stared down at the paper in front of you, quill nearly breaking from the force you were applying to it, throat closing up as you blinked away your tears, not wanting anyone to see.
The study time felt like it lasted hours, your hands shaking as you packed your things up and headed straight for your common room, burying yourself under the blankets on your bed and screaming into your pillow.
You were sure you were in love with Fred Weasley, as certain as you were that the sky was blue and grass was green. Your happiness grew when you heard him laugh, heart pounding whenever he was near.
He loved Angelina though.
Tears soaked your pillow as you tried to put your heart back together somehow. Tried to be okay with it.
But how were you supposed to get over a boy you were never with? How were you supposed to fall out of love with someone that didn’t love you?
Your chest ached, eyes sore from wiping away tears, yet they still fell.
And so you sat, crying over a love you never had. And most likely never would.
-
Death;-
“How’re you feeling?” Fred asked as he joined you in a secluded area of the castle. The battle preparations were ongoing, with everyone quickly projecting all the protective spells they knew on any part of the school they could.
You looked out and could see a swarm of black figures heading towards you in the distance, making everything seem that much more real, that much more scary.
“Scared,” you admitted glancing up at the redhead, who nodded.
“Me too,” he confirmed. He opened his arms and pulled you into his chest, into a warm hug. You closed your eyes, breathing in his scent as your arms wrapped tightly around him.
You both stood there for just a while, his hands rubbing your back reassuringly, and you decided, in that moment, you needed to tell him.
You needed to tell him you loved him.
Needed him to know, before you both set off fighting. Needed to know if there was chance for you both - if this was another reason to fight.
“I need to tell you something, before it all starts,” your voice was quiet, but you knew Fred heard as he pulled away to look at you, his hands still holding your waist as he focused on you.
“What is it?”
“I-“ you hesitated for a moment, swallowing nervously as your gaze dropped to the floor. Fred lifted your head up gently with his thumb, a touch that set your skin alight, one that sent shivers down your spin.
“What’s wrong?” He asked softly, in contrast to his usual booming voice, a concerned look set on his features as he looked down at you, his brown eyes showcasing his worry.
“Please don’t hate me,” you replied, just as soft. You squeezed your eyes tightly, feeling him grab one of your hands in his as the hand on your chin moved to cup your cheek.
“Darling, you’re scaring me. What’s going on?”
You bit your lip, reopening your eyes and catching his gaze, your heart pounding as you tried to think of the words you wanted to say, “I don’t want to go into this battle without you knowing, so I- I guess what I’m trying to say is... well, I’m in love with you.”
Silence is odd, having the ability to be both comfortable and tension-filled depending on the company and context. Usually, silence around Fred was comforting, knowing he was there without either of you having to say a word. But this silence, the silence that hung over you, made your heart leap to your throat, and you swallowed harshly, wincing at the wide-eyed look he was giving you at this revelation.
His hand dropped from your cheek and he stepped away just a little, just enough that you swore he probably could’ve heard your heart crack, before he finally spoke, his voice a shaky whisper, as if he didn’t know what to say, how to reply.
“Y/n, darling, I love you...”
You felt your eyes widening a little, heart beating fast now due to his response. You didn’t think you’d ever hear him say those three little words, ones that held so much meaning. The beginnings of the battle around you faded, and you could only think about how you loved Fred, and Fred loved you. Everything was going to be okay - you had each other.
Just as you were going to step forward, a watery laugh nearly escaping your lips, you realised he was still finishing his sentence, that he hadn’t finished answering you.
“... but only as a friend.”
His voice was gentle, but his words cut like glass, sharp pieces hitting your chest and ripping your skin, the words reverberating in your head. And suddenly warm tears were falling down your cheeks - you’d let yourself get your hopes up, let yourself imagine a life where you loved Fred and he loved you. When in reality, he didn’t love you.
He wasn’t in love with you.
You took a shaky breath, nodding at him as you pressed your lips together, wrapping your arms around yourself as you stepped back away from him.
“I know,” you whispered, looking away from his gaze, feeling embarrassed, above anything else, trying to force a smile onto your face, “I-I know... I just- I needed to tell you.”
You swallowed, shaking your head. You felt stupid. He’d never shown he was interested, you didn’t know why you’d ever thought there was a chance.
He ran a hand through his messy hair, before reaching out towards you, a look of sympathetic despair crossing his features as he tried to bring you closer to him.
As his fingers brushed yours and you pulled away as though he burnt you, he felt his heart clench, taking a shaky breath as he watched one of his closest friends pull away from him, tears lining his vision as you moved further away from him, his hand hovering mid-air as though he still wanted - needed - you to be near him.
“Love, please. I-I can’t lose you. Please, let’s just- Let’s talk about this. After all this- please. Don’t walk away, I-I need you Y/n. I’m sorry I don’t lov- but that doesn’t mean I don’t care about you. I care about you so so much,” his lips were trembling, tears falling freely as he reached out again, a sob escaping his lips as you hesitated, allowing him to take his hand in yours for just a moment.
“It’s okay, Freddie,” you whispered, though he and you both knew it wasn’t okay, and possibly wouldn’t ever go back to the way things were before you told him you loved him, “I just- I need to be alone.”
“We’re going into battle, I need you to know that I-“
“I’m sorry,” you shook your head, “I can’t do this.”
Fred tried desperately to get you to stay. He didn’t want to watch you leave, to watch you walk away from him. Not like this, not when you were both about to risk your lives fighting in a dangerous battle, where one wrong move could cost you your life.
“But I-“
“I need to go,” You pulled your hand from his and turned on your heel, wiping your tears away quickly as you ran off.
Fred’s mouth opened, as if he wanted to say something, as if he wanted to call after you, before closing it again and shaking his head sadly, wiping a last lone tear that fell down his cheek before shoving his hands into his pockets.
He’d find you after the battle and speak to you, he decided.
He couldn’t lose you. Not like this.
***
You were tired. The battle wore on around you as you stumbled through the fallen pieces of the building around you, overwhelmed at the fighting and overcome with the realisation that you were basically a bunch of kids trying to fight in a war you tried to prevent.
You hadn’t seen anyone for a while, being towards the back of the school, only fighting the occasional death eater who wandered close to you. You were hiding out after a particularly nasty hex left a gash down your arm, trying your best to bandage it up as best you could.
You hoped everyone was okay, had already passed by Colin Creevey lying on the floor as you found somewhere to hide. You’d almost stopped for a moment, hoping he was just unconscious, however the angle he was lay at told you otherwise, and you forced yourself to move on before anyone came back.
Still reeling with emotion from your talk before the battle, you’d shot spells carelessly at death eaters, hoping it was enough to keep them away. To keep you alive.
You turned the corner, wand raised, your eyes scanning the scene as you tried to find somebody - anybody.
And that’s when you saw it.
A flash of light, and you felt yourself running towards it, stumbling over the rubble, dodging spells in desperation. It hit the wall, the ginger boy stood underneath unaware.
You screamed out his name, the sound somehow cutting through the spells and fighting, your lungs burning as you willed yourself to run faster.
It played out in your mind in slow motion, the light, the stone crumbling, falling.
Fred turned at the sound of your voice, a smile etched on his face from something Percy had said, but just before you could push him out of the way, the wall fell.
You halted, barely metres away, nearly losing your footing as you choked out a sob, tears streaming as you stared at Percy, who had the same stricken look on his face.
Neither of you spared a glance around you before rushing towards where the eldest twin once stood, desperate to find him, to make sure he was okay.
Removing the pieces of rubble with a desperation you didn’t know you could feel, until you found a tuft of ginger hair sticking out between two broken bricks. Your heart clenched, stuck in your throat as you revealed his face, his last smile etched onto his features.
You didn’t hear the scream that left your mouth, didn’t feel Percy gently moving you so he could remove the stones from on top of the rest of Fred’s body.
Your eyes wandered across his face, his freckled skin, the slope of his nose and down to his chapped lips. Tears fell onto his face as your hands rested on his shoulders, gripping onto the fabric of his sweater, sobs racking through your body as you ignored the battle going on around you.
“Wake up, Freddie, please wake up!”
Your pleas went unanswered, the ginger boy laying before you still, his face unwavering.
“No, please!” You sobbed. You didn’t notice Percy’s hand on your shoulder, or his heartbroken mentions to move his little brother away from the fighting - to move you away from the fighting.
You clung to Fred, not wanting to let him go, not being able to, “You gotta wake up, Fred. This isn’t funny, this isn’t a good prank. Please wake up. Please just-“
You ran a hand through his hair and wiped your tears off his cheek, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for walking away. Please. We need you. George needs you. I need you. Please.”
Your voice cracked as you spoke to him, white noise filling your ears as all you could focus on was the sight of the boy laying before you, cuts across the side of his head, his brown eyes once shining, now dull. You grabbed his hand, holding it in yours, refusing to let go.
You weren’t sure when Fred’s body was taken from you, when he was moved into the Great Hall, too shaken up to think of anything but the thought of the wall falling over and over again, playing out in your mind like a cruel nightmare, each time you were too late, barely metres too late, seconds too late to stop it.
You sobbed into George’s shoulder, his head resting on yours as you both cried.
Before anything, Fred was one of your closest friends. One of your best friends. And now you’d never get to see him smile again, never hear his laugh or get to play silly pranks with him.
You’d never hug him again, never hear his flirty comebacks and witty jokes.
And as you felt George’s clutch tighten on you, both as broken as the other at losing the person you loved the most, a grief-stricken sob escaped your lips, causing George to pull away a little to see if you were okay, his eyes bloodshot, tears streaming down his face, still so caring after losing his other half, your bottom lip trembled as you thought back over everything.
You had walked away from him. Your last words bouncing around your head - I need to go. In your haste, you never said goodbye to the boy you loved. And now you never could, would never get the chance.
George squeezed his eyes tight as he brought you closer to his chest, you grabbing a handful of his t shirt in your fist as tears streamed down both your faces. You mumbled something inaudible into his chest and he moved to hear you better. The same words fell out of your mouth over and over, between broken sobs and falling tears,
“I’m sorry, I was too late.”
-
Life;-
The first few months after the battle were difficult. You saw him in everything - in every bit of laughter, every bright colour, every joke.
You saw him in George, who’d tried his hardest to forget. He’d smashed all his mirrors, tried to dye his hair, before you found him, collapsed in a ball of sobs in the middle of his flat, whispering, “Please, bring him back.”
After living his entire life with Fred in it, he didn’t know how to live without him.
You relied on each other to get you through, taking it day by day, trying to mend your hearts, broken in different, yet very similar ways.
The nightmares were the worst.
Waking up in cold sweats, seeing the wall collapse in front of you, knowing you were too late and didn’t get to say goodbye to the boy you loved. Knowing if you were just a few seconds earlier, George would still have his twin brother by his side, laughing and making jokes like usual.
“The worst part isn’t remembering. It’s easy to remember. The worst part, the hardest part, is those times I forget to remember. I forget that he’s not here, that he’s gone. And then I remember and I feel so guilty,” you’d told George, half a year after the battle. It was nearing Christmas, a time you both used to love, yet now you were apprehensive, didn’t know how to do Christmas without Fred.
George had replied sweetly, wrapping his arms around you and hugging you. And whilst it didn’t feel the same as the way Fred had hugged you before the battle, the feeling was comforting, warm and familiar, “He knew you loved him. You cared for him, watched over him to make sure he didn’t do anything too stupid. And now he gets to return the favour and watch over you.”
“He’s really gone isn’t he. He’s just... gone.”
The night you’d gone through his things with George was difficult. It was sad, sometimes overwhelming, but you also got to sit and just remember, reminding yourselves who Fred was.
With every Weasley product you found, with every photograph you came across, every sweater, broken quill and long-forgotten sketch, your sad tears began to turn into happy ones, laughing with George about your times in Hogwarts, about better days gone by.
It was funny, that even though he was gone, he could still bring smiles to your faces.
Maybe that’s why he was so special, why it hurt so much to lose him. He made the people around him happy, through everything.
You visited him often, needing to apologise, to properly say goodbye. Or just to feel like you were close to him again. To thank him for all he’d done, for allowing you to love him how you did. For being such an important person in so many people’s lives.
Wiping a tear that fell down your cheek, your hand reached out to hold onto the gravestone before you for balance, smiling through your tears as your fingers ran across his name, engraved on the stone.
‘Fred Weasley
1st April 1978 - 2nd May 1998’
You kneeled down, placing a single flower across the grass in front of the stone. It’d been years since you’d lost Fred and somehow the pain got worse every day.
But you knew, with time, things would get better. You’d find your happiness, and learn to move on.
All you had to do was wait for it.
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in the mood for love (m)
pairing: wong yukhei x (f) reader
genre: fluff, smut, slice of life, some angst
summary: distance makes the heart grow fonder. in yukhei’s case, it makes him reminisce on all the firsts of your relationship and realise you’re the one he wants to spend the rest of his life with. (or: a long-distance relationship au where yukhei savours every moment of your short reunion.)
warnings: unprotected sex, language
tags: established relationship, flashbacks, set in hk, hendery and kunten appear, drunk texting, flirty dialogue, love letters, talks of marriage, pining, a bittersweet ending
word count: 14.6k
a/n: wow, it feels weird to be finally posting this because i’ve been working on this for months. this took way longer than expected and for that i wanna thank my sweet mutuals and anons who have been so patient and encouraging :’) i hope you’re in the mood for fluff and domesticity because this fic is full of it! enjoy! (reposting again bc the original one wouldn’t show up in the tags. tysm if you’ve interacted with that post btw <3)
--
heaven is in your eyes
bright as the stars we're under
oh, is it any wonder
i'm in the mood for love?
-
why stop to think of whether
this little dream might fade?
we've put our hearts together
now we are one, i'm not afraid
-
if there's a cloud above
if it should rain we'll let it
but for tonight, forget it
i'm in the mood for love
--
mornings like this are hard to come by for yukhei.
when the only sounds he can hear are the ticking of a clock and your soft exhalations. when you’re cuddled up to him, your face tucked into the crook of his neck where you breathe warm puffs of air onto his skin every few seconds.
it’s probably just another one of those dreams that yukhei gets every now and then. the kind he never wants to wake up from, because when he opens his eyes, all he sees is the dull grey ceiling of his dormitory before his bunkmates’ noisy snores snap him back into reality.
those mornings were the worst. yukhei would give up on going back to sleep. instead, he’d force himself out of bed to wash up and head to the canteen for an early breakfast, all while annoyed that his mind had once again translated his yearning for you into his dreams. he couldn’t help but feel like he was being mocked by his own self.
but this time, it feels different.
his back is resting on a bed that’s much comfier than the thin mattress he’s used to back at camp, and he’s awfully snug and cosy under what feels like a thick fleece blanket.
yukhei peels his eyelids open, ready to be met with disappointment again.
the first thing he sees is the sunrise peeking through the curtains, greeting him good morning with a dark orange glow — which is weird, because he’s always up before the sun is. even though his mind is still fuzzy, yukhei has an inkling that he’s not back at camp. so he lifts his head off the pillow and looks around.
there’s a messy work desk between two huge potted plants; a wall fully plastered with polaroids and pictures; and a clothing rack with clothes that clearly aren’t his but it’s the bra hanging over an armchair that finally tells yukhei that he’s in your bedroom.
he looks down and sighs in relief seeing you in deep slumber next to him. you’re sleeping on your side with a hand absentmindedly resting on his waist, your head tilted as if you fell asleep while gazing at him. your eyes are closed and the look on your face is so peaceful — it’s an image that yukhei wants to keep in his mind forever.
wrapping an arm around your hips, yukhei gently tugs you closer to him. your eyebrow scrunches in reaction and he panics a little, freezing when your hand lands on top of his. but you turn on your other side and snuggle back against his chest instead, and his lips curl into a lopsided smile at this tiny movement.
yukhei hugs you from behind, nuzzling into your hair and sighing when he gets a whiff of your apple-scented shampoo that he has missed so much.
just like that, the warmth of your bodies wrapped around each other and the thought of getting to spend the next few days with you — in real life, not just in his dreams — lulls him back to sleep.
--
yukhei would never forget the day he first met you.
or the sight of you sitting at the back of his mum’s restaurant, sipping on a glass of iced tea as you stared out of the window and silently observed the hustle and bustle of shatin plaza.
the fact that his usual seat was occupied and that a pretty girl was sitting in it left him speechless, but not annoyed at all. sure, it was his favourite spot. it also unofficially belonged to him, seeing how he sat there nearly everyday doing his homework — but that was years ago.
yukhei felt like the universe had something up its sleeve when it presented him with such a scenario on a day where he finally managed to pop by his mum’s restaurant and pay her a visit. he rarely popped by on weekdays anymore because of how hectic his academic life was becoming.
“look who it is! our yukhei who keeps growing taller and taller!”
yukhei smiled shyly as he stepped behind the counter and greeted the longtime staff — aunties who never failed to shower him with all sorts of compliments — and rushed into the kitchen looking for his mum.
mrs wong was less than pleased when she saw her son, to say the least. the smile on her face lasted for a good minute before she started nagging about how he should’ve gone home to study instead.
“i am going to study! right after i eat.” he whined, shocked that his presence had irritated her so much.
“you always say that, yukhei. but you just play games on your phone!” mrs wong retorted, not looking away from the refrigerator.
yukhei gulped at that statement, unwilling to admit that it was quite true.
“mum, who’s that girl outside? sitting at my table?”
“your table?” she chuckled before looking up at him.
yukhei watched her make her way towards the kitchen entrance to peek at the stranger outside.
“ah, that’s _____. she comes here often.” she said with a bright smile that even yukhei himself rarely received. “she helped us understand what the tourists were saying, talked to them in english for us a few times now. a very sweet and smart girl.”
if anything, yukhei became more attracted to you at that moment.
maybe it’s the thought of you helping his mum out while he’s not around — he knew how rude and impatient some tourists could be with language barriers, having personally dealt with them several times — or maybe it’s just the way you entered his life that, for some reason, felt like an important moment to him.
either way, he already made up his mind about one thing.
yukhei ended up serving you the pad thai you had been waiting for, warmly introducing himself as the lady boss’ first and older son and striking up a conversation with you that went on longer than he had expected.
he thought it was bad that he had to control his excitement when you suggested he take the seat opposite yours, but it only got worse as you both began to talk about everything and nothing.
when you smiled, he lost his train of thought. when you laughed or so much as even chuckled, his chest squeezed around his heart and he wanted to keep hearing the sound of it. and when you listened to him, he had to look away because your attentive gaze on him was truly too much.
by the time you were done with your meal, yukhei had your number saved in his phone. he offered to walk you out, opening the glass doors for you all gentlemanly as if you had just dined at a five-star hotel restaurant.
“it was nice talking to you, yukhei.” you turned to smile at him just before you stepped outside. “see you again, i guess?”
“yeah, let’s—um. yeah, see you around.” yukhei stuttered pathetically.
you giggled and waved goodbye to him and mrs wong before heading off. the lady boss had been subtly keeping an eye on you two after her son insisted on waiting your table.
once you were out of view, yukhei sighed, cringing at how nervous he sounded. before you, he had never in his life felt that self-conscious in front of anyone.
“my dear, what was that?” his mum asked with a sly look of amusement on her face.
yukhei wanted the floor to open up and swallow him whole.
“i don’t know, mum.”
all he could think about was seeing you again.
--
when yukhei wakes up again, he’s alone in bed.
the midday sunlight glares into the room and shines on the empty spot next to him, prompting him to roll away and further into the shade.
he lies on his side, watching some plant-shaped shadows sway across the wall for a minute before forcing himself out of bed. those extra hours of sleep did wonders for his circadian rhythm and for once he doesn’t feel tired to be awake at all — just bummed that he woke up with you not in his arms.
something in the air shifted after last night. yukhei couldn’t get over the way you jumped into his arms when he appeared at your doorstep, or how you got emotional at his shaky confession as he presented you with the promise ring he had been keeping for so long.
he had been craving for your presence so much over the past few months that seeing you reciprocate those feelings made him relieved and somewhat clingy. all he wants is to stick by your side every second he has with you before he leaves again.
so he gets out of bed immediately, walking into your tiny living room where he hears the sound of running water and finds you leaning against the kitchen counter with your back facing him, busily tending to the roses he had gifted you last night.
yukhei makes his way to you fast. his hands sneak beneath your oversized t-shirt and around your waist, pulling your frame against his front as he places a kiss on your temple.
“morning,” you say, relaxing into his touch and reaching for the nape of his neck with one hand to tug his face closer to yours.
yukhei hums in satisfaction when you angle your face perfectly to lock your lips with his in a tender kiss and whines when you attempt to pull away. he wants to taste your lips for a little longer, he’s far from done and you know it too.
you turn around to face him properly, abandoning the stalks of roses that had your attention earlier. a gasp escapes you when he slides his hands down to your bum and swiftly lifts you onto the counter.
“missed my baby so much,” he mumbles against the juncture of your jaw and neck, relishing in your soft sighs by his ear.
he doesn’t miss the way your legs hook around his waist to pull him closer or the way your fingertips lightly scratch his scalp as he busily sucks at your skin, determined to leave a trail of love marks for his own appreciation.
the doorbell rings just as he’s licking over his masterpiece, rudely interrupting the moment.
“yukhei.” you squeeze his shoulders and yukhei forces himself to pull away.
“who’s that?” he asks, unable to hide the tone of disappointment in his voice. his hands refuse to leave your skin, his thumb gently caressing the curve of your underboob.
you giggle at his pouty lips before adjusting the short bangs hanging over his forehead that he hated despite the many times you told him he looked cute.
“i ordered brunch for us.”
dumbfounded and still in a half-asleep state, yukhei helps you off the counter. he watches you look into the peephole before opening the door and picking up a large paper bag that had been sitting on your doormat.
“i thought you’d be hungry after waking up.” you say, setting the bag into your small dining table for two. “i hope you don’t mind, bub. i didn’t want to cook anything because, well—i can’t. i haven’t been to the grocery store this week. but we can always head there later and get stuff for the next few days.”
yukhei lets out a huff of disbelief. “baby.”
but you don’t hear him. you’re so busy unpacking the small food boxes onto the table as you ramble on and on, oblivious to the way he was staring at you in adoration.
“i got you your favourite stuff. spring rolls, shu mai—what?”
at last you notice how quiet he has been and you freeze, looking at him with your eyes wide in concern.
“sit down and let me do the work, please.” yukhei pleads, dragging a chair out. “you did all that while i did nothing and slept like a log!”
you laugh, shaking your head as you sit down. “i just dialed a number and asked for some food. and i know you really needed that sleep.”
once all the food boxes are arranged neatly on the table, yukhei takes his seat next to you. you’re in the midst of reaching for a pair of chopsticks when his hand grabs onto yours, halting your movements.
there’s a moment of silence as you curiously watch him readjust his thumb below the joints of your fingers, bringing the back of your hand towards his lips.
“thank you, baby. i love you.” he tells you with a dazed smile, placing a kiss just above where the promise ring hugs your finger.
“you’re welcome.”
you tell him you love him too before you bite back a huge smile — the kind that satisfies yukhei so much because he knows he’s the reason behind it.
--
yukhei couldn’t put into words how elated he was when you texted him back a few days after your slightly awkward first meeting, agreeing to hang out with him that upcoming friday night.
truth be told, there weren’t any concrete plans for your first date. it was amusing to him really, how the conversation ended right after you both settled on a meeting place, with no discussions of what to do or where to eat.
maybe you were simply excited to see him again and didn’t really care about what the plan was — because that was exactly how yukhei felt.
the bus ride to the shopping mall felt longer than usual. yukhei found himself staring at his reflection in the window a few times, adjusting the sleeves of his jacket and making sure he looked good.
he had rushed home straight after javelin practice and taken the quickest shower of his life before spending a good amount of time styling his hair. it was not the wisest idea — choosing a late school day when there were six other days in a week where he wouldn’t have to rush — but he had been merely trying his luck when he sent that message asking if you were free. he wasn’t expecting you to actually say yes.
so when he spotted you waiting all by yourself from afar, he quickened his footsteps amidst the crowd, never taking his eyes off of you.
your face lit up as soon as you saw him and you waved, the crop top you wore lifting a little. yukhei’s gaze flew to the sliver of skin exposed and the nervousness that had been bubbling in his tummy earlier instantly melted into nothing.
the night went quite smoothly. yukhei could not have enjoyed himself more, from dinner at the sushi bar you had recommended to the impromptu movie session that had the both of you sharing the only available seat left: a couple seat.
he was falling harder as he got to know you more and it scared him just how fast it was happening.
“do you watch superhero movies a lot?” you asked as the two of you turned into another alley of food stalls.
yukhei had insisted on accompanying you back to the train station after the movie as it was getting late. he was not going to leave you alone when nightlife in the city was just starting, not when the streets were bound to get rowdy.
“not really. i mean blockbusters are nice but i love old dramas and action flicks, you know?” yukhei answered, turning to look at you in his jacket that had been on you since he noticed you shivering in the cinema. he couldn’t help but smile at how your fingertips were peeking beneath the long sleeves.
“wait, me too!” you gasped, turning to look at him with a huge smile. “why didn’t you stop us from watching iron man?”
“well you suggested it so i thought you really wanted to watch it!” yukhei laughed as he scratched the back of his neck sheepishly. “i’m sorry.”
“no, that’s my bad. i didn’t know what you liked so i just picked something popular.” you rolled your eyes playfully. “maybe we can watch the great gatsby next time. i think we might enjoy that.”
next time?
it took yukhei a few seconds to acknowledge the idea of a second date that you had brought up so casually.
“r-really?” he cringed as the single word fumbled through his lips.
“yeah?” you replied, the blank look on his face amusing you a little. “we can watch something else too, if you want.”
“no!” he perked up. “let’s watch gatsby.”
eventually the two of you arrived at the train station, where goodbyes were exchanged rather reluctantly and awkwardly. yukhei watched as you took a few steps away from him before abruptly turning back around.
“what’s wrong?”
“your jacket!” you ran a hand through your hair abashedly. “i almost forgot! i mean i did, but.”
yukhei’s hands flew to yours before he could stop himself, stopping you from taking his black denim jacket off.
“it gets cold in the train. you should have it.” his hands flew to his sides awkwardly. “you can give it back to me next time, it’s okay.”
“oh.” you said so softly that yukhei almost missed it. your eyes fell onto the short sleeves hugging his arms and he read your mind right away.
“i’ll be fine. my bus ride home is pretty quick.” he reassured you. it was a lie. the weather had started getting cooler and that’s why he brought a jacket out in the first place, but it was nothing he couldn’t handle.
yukhei noticed that your cheeks had reddened a little. why were you so cute?
“okay then,” you said with a tiny smile. “thanks again, yukhei.”
yukhei landed on his bed face flat after a warm shower, absolutely exhausted and ready to hit the sack. to be fair, it had been a long day for him and it was close to midnight.
if it was any other weekday night, he would be snoring already. but he had just sent you a text asking if you reached home already and was eagerly waiting for your reply.
at last, after a long five minutes, yukhei’s phone buzzed a few times in a row.
[from: _____][sent at 11:57PM]
hey
i just got out of the shower
thx for checking in :)
and thx for tonight again, i had a good time :)
wait it’s almost 12!!
you’re still awake?
yukhei didn’t realise a bunch of alphabets and symbols could make him so happy. his thumb hovered over his phone screen as he began to type out a reply, but a more texts came flying in.
[from: _____][sent at 11:59PM]
well
in case you’re already sleeping..
goodnight and sweet dreams~
just minutes ago, he had been so ready to fall asleep. but the rush of happiness he experienced as he read your texts over again made that impossible now. yukhei couldn’t put away his phone, couldn’t stop himself from grinning.
he was screwed. he knew he was, when that was the effect you had on him after only days of knowing each other.
--
“well, well, well. if it isn’t my favourite couple.”
“sorry,” you sigh while yukhei simply shoots an apologetic smile at kunhang as he slips into the booth after you. “you know how bad traffic is at this hour.”
“it’s okay.” says ten who’s sitting next to kunhang and shoving his nintendo switch into his bag. “but we ordered some stuff first because i’m starving my ass off.”
“oh that’s great!” yukhei cheers. “i’m hungry too.”
“already? weren’t you guys just at your mum’s restaurant?” ten chuckles as he looks up, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose.
kunhang snorts. “he’s hungry all the time, remember? you should see his snack stash back at our dorms.”
just before they parted ways at camp at the start of their vacation, kunhang had suggested to yukhei that they have a get-together meal with ten — the oldest of the trio who recently scored a job at a renown art gallery in town and decided to stay for good, instead of flying back to his hometown.
yukhei agreed to it, not just because he missed his friend dearly, but also because it’s been a while since all of you had a meal together. when he brought it up to you, you were thrilled at the idea of catching up with them, even if that meant giving up some of his already limited time with you. that’s how you and him ended up sitting across from his two best friends at a hot pot restaurant tonight.
as food arrives and gradually takes up every inch of space on the table, everyone takes turns giving updates on their lives. yukhei shares memorable incidents at camp and kunhang adds on to his stories with funny anecdotes that make you and ten laugh, while ten announces that his longtime boyfriend, kun, has moved into his apartment.
“so how’s it like living with kun so far?” you ask, ladling soup from the simmering pot in the center of the table for everyone.
“i’m getting used to my fridge having food and my kitchen actually being used.” ten replies with a shy smile that yukhei rarely got to see. “it’s only been a week and it’s getting messy in there, but i’m not complaining.”
“aw.”
yukhei hears you coo, and he can practically see the look of endearment on your face even though he’s focused on all the meat you’ve put on his plate earlier.
“and when are the two of you planning to tell us that you’re getting married?” the long-haired boy smirks, squinting at the gold band hugging your ring finger.
the question stunts you and yukhei and kunhang nearly chokes on his sprite. the innocent smile that was on ten’s face just seconds ago was now long gone and replaced with a mischievous one.
“married?” kunhang exclaims, his voice so loud that the couple in the next booth turns over to look. thoroughly embarrassed, he presses the front of his cap down to hide his eyes. “how am i not the first person to know this, yukhei?”
yukhei sighs. where, and how, should he begin?
as he glares at ten who’s enjoying this a bit too much, you set your chopsticks down and hold your hand out to an eager kunhang, who marvels at the piece of jewellery on your ring finger up close.
“so?” ten lets out a cheeky, high-pitched giggle at the look yukhei gives him. “did you guys just come back from telling your fam the good news or…?”
yukhei grins devilishly as he picks up a bean sprout with his chopsticks, ready to fling it at ten, but you’re faster than him.
“we’re not—i mean, we’re getting married. eventually! not now, obviously.” you chuckle in a flustered manner.
we’re getting married.
yukhei’s heart flutters at that sentence. he wants to hear you say that again, wants to be the one to tell his friends that.
“you’ll be the first to know when we do.” yukhei adds, nudging kunhang’s foot underneath the table, earning an eye-roll from ten.
“well, you better.” kunhang quipped. “we’ve been talking about this for years now. it’s time you two quit playing and actually get it done.”
“ah, so this is a promise ring?” ten cuts in excitedly. it’s now his turn to examine the ring as kunhang gets back to his food. “it’s so pretty. it definitely suits you.”
“thanks,” you beam as you pull your hand back. “yukhei got it years ago but won’t tell me when or where. says it’s a secret.”
the two boys gawk at yukhei right away and he sighs, bracing himself for what’s to come.
“oh xuxi, you romantic baby!” ten teases, clearly having the time of his life making yukhei blush tonight.
“so this is what you were nervous about!” kunhang scoffs in disbelief before looking between you and ten. “we were on the train back to the city and he wouldn’t shut up about being nervous for some surprise plan. and he just wouldn’t tell me what!”
“oh my god, you guys are so cute. it’s gross.” ten shakes his head. “you’re lucky i love you both!”
yukhei smiles bashfully. he was a little embarrassed at first, but of course ten and kunhang had to make it worse. he wanted to pull his beanie over his entire face and ignore everything.
you’re awfully silent next to him as you glance between your food and your lap shyly, your hair shielding your face from everyone else. a warm rush of adoration washes over yukhei and he finds himself gently adjusting your hair, tugging a loose strand behind your ear.
“okay, that’s it.” kunhang groans, grabbing his bag and pretending to leave the table. “thanks for the meal, you guys.”
“you can’t just leave!” ten exclaims, reaching for his cup of tea. “you haven’t asked _____ for her friends’ numbers yet.”
kunhang stares at ten, his eyes widening and jaw dropping in horror before he starts bickering with him — a scene that has you bursting into laughter and yukhei reminiscing the good old days where the four of you would hang out at the mall for hours after class. kunhang was always so starstruck by the popular girls at your all-girls school though you weren’t close with any of them. nothing has really changed since you entered university.
“you told me to remind you!” ten retorts.
“not in front of everyone!” kunhang cries dramatically.
“dude. it’s literally just the four of us.” ten deadpans. “always has been.”
“anyway,” kunhang rolls his eyes as he turns to face you. “so, _____. any of your friends single again?”
you do your best to look sympathetic before shaking your head. yukhei splutters out a laugh while ten pats kunhang’s shoulder in an attempt to comfort him.
“this would be a lot easier if you were, you know, into guys.”
--
yukhei’s first kiss with you was, for him, a long time coming.
it happened at the end of your fifth date, after a day spent at the park.
summer had fully transitioned into fall and the weather was cool enough for the two of you to set up a picnic at a sunny spot. everything was perfect — from the calming sounds of nature to the desserts you both brought to the cute dress you wore underneath your sweater that matched the greenery around you.
more than a month had passed since yukhei first met you. with every date, the urge to hold your hands when you walked around in public and to kiss you and finally know what your lips tasted like kept growing.
yukhei smiled as he watched you talk about your week even though he already heard these stories since you text each other so much. your words went in and out of his ears and it was hard for him to concentrate because all he could think of was whether you liked him too.
there were moments that made him consider it a possibility, like how you surprised him with his favourite snacks after one of his javelin practice sessions or the way you would smile when you caught him staring at your face.
he was torn between over-romanticising those moments and acknowledging them as the plain and simple fact that you liked him too.
he felt it again as the two of you watched the sun set and slowly sink into the horizon across the river, the sky dissolving into hues of orange.
the scene in front of him was majestic, but yukhei could only concentrate on how close to him you and him were. so close that your arms were brushing against each other’s, so close that you could rest your head on his shoulder if you leaned a little.
“i like this a lot.” you said out of the blue, your eyes still fixed on the sunset in the distance. you leaned back, anchoring your palms against the mat to make yourself comfortable.
“i like you a lot.���
yukhei couldn’t stop himself. those words had been kept inside him for too long.
silence hung in the air as your proximity grew tense. yukhei couldn’t see your face and he was starting to think that maybe it was for his own good. when he felt you sitting up straight and he held his breath, expecting the worst.
“i like you too.” your voice was barely audible and you sounded just as nervous as he did, but yukhei heard you loud and clear.
his eyes widened as he turned to you at the speed of light. you had been looking at him nervously but as soon as your eyes met, your gaze quickly flickered towards your hands that were fidgeting with the sleeve of your sweater.
“really?” yukhei placed his hand over yours, gently circling the back of it with his thumb. “you like me… in that way?”
“yeah.” you mumbled, resting your head in the nook between his neck and shoulder exactly how he had pictured in his mind earlier. “i like you. a lot.”
relief flooded yukhei’s veins and he could finally breathe hearing you say the words he had so badly wanted to hear. nothing else mattered in that moment, because all he could think of was you seeing him in the same light he saw you in.
and suddenly, everything made sense to him. how could he be so stupid, after all that had happened in the past few weeks? the way you’d remember the little details of things he told you and how you’d blush at his terrible pick-up lines? of course you liked him too.
“what are you thinking about?” you squeezed his hand as you pulled back to look at him.
your face had never been so close to his. yukhei could count your eyelashes and have a proper look at your lips that looked soft and velvety. everything about this moment made it impossible for him to ignore what he had been dreaming of doing.
“can i kiss you?” yukhei asked.
all he could remember was how your eyes lit up instantly, every trace of worry fading away as an innocent smile graced your face. then you leaned in and closed your eyes just as he did, your lips meeting in a long awaited kiss.
yukhei cupped the side of your face with one hand, his thumb drawing soothing circles over your cheekbones. he felt himself sink into the feeling of your fluffy lips moving languidly against his, the way they tasted sweet like the strawberry shortcakes you shared earlier.
it took everything in yukhei to not whine when you pulled away to catch your breath, even though the kiss was probably longer than it should have been. he could still feel the butterflies in stomach as you pressed your forehead against his and he didn’t want them to fade away so soon, so he spoiled you with a few chaste kisses in a row that left both your lips tingling by the end.
“been wanting to do that for a long time.” yukhei beamed.
he reached for your hand that had been on his knee and interlocked your fingers — a small gesture he could now make anytime he wanted, and that made him a very happy boy.
the sun was almost gone but even under the dim fluorescent lighting from the street lamps, yukhei could tell that you were flushing and giddy with affection like him. the golden hour casted a warm orange glow onto your skin and you couldn’t look more like the girl of his dreams.
“i know. me too.”
the butterflies in yukhei’s stomach fluttered wildly at the sound of your airy chuckle. there was nothing that could take away the smile on his face.
--
yukhei did not expect to wake up to the sight of you in nothing but his camo jacket.
the lack of body heat woke him up and he found himself once again lying alone in bed and wondering where you were — but all his thoughts flew out of the window when he heard the bedroom door creak and saw you stepping back in.
he had to blink a few times to make sure his mind wasn’t playing tricks on him and that you were indeed, dressed only in his camo army jacket.
you’re standing beforeyour dresser to examine the love mark yukhei branded on your neck the night before, oblivious to how he’s silently observing you and getting hard again.
there’s something about the way his jacket reaches your midthigh and teasingly moves upwards to offer him a glimpse of your ass each time you lifted your hands to run over your skin that turns him on so much. and he has seen you in his t-shirts and muscle tanks many times before, but none of that could compare to how you looked right now and he has no clue why so.
maybe it’s the consecutive months of being deprived of your touch and having to picture your body as he took cold showers to relieve himself on some mornings. but he doesn’t have to rely on his imagination now that you’re here, in front of him, like a present waiting to be unwrapped and appreciated.
yukhei lets out a whine that gets muffled into the pillow, but you hear it immediately and whirl around in surprise.
“hey.” you smile lazily as you make your way back to bed, landing on your knees and crawling towards him.
yukhei’s eyes are glued to the gap between his unbuttoned jacket, which hangs loose enough on your body to bless him with the sight of your cleavage, the smooth expanse of your body, and as he lowers his gaze — your core between your parted thighs.
he’s visibly infatuated, and you clearly don’t entertain that as you sit on where his crotch is beneath the sheets, lying down on him to give him a quick smooch. your lips are warm and taste like lemon, which tells yukhei you just had your morning mug of tea.
“morning,” yukhei mumbles, slipping a hand beneath his jacket to rest on your back. your skin is smooth and warm under his touch as always. “this looks so much better on you.”
“yeah?” you chuckle softly. “hope you don’t mind, it was cold.”
“i don’t mind it at all,” yukhei smiles, raising his other hand to cup your cheek affectionately. “but i need you.”
“need you to warm me up, baby.” he says, his voice deepening with the next sentence. “want you to ride me in this.”
you’re looking down at him in a hazy gaze when your breathing pauses. you don’t answer him with words — instead, you slot your lips between his, never pulling away as you get on your knees and pull the covers off.
yukhei sighs into the kiss at the feeling of his cock standing tall and unrestrained, desperately begging for your attention. he lets out a heavier sigh as your hand wraps around his hard length and starts stroking him with purpose.
“just like that.” he groans, his eyebrows furrowed in pleasure as his hips start thrusting into your grip. you line his jaw with kisses, making him feel pampered and content.
“want you too.” you purr.
yukhei hears how needy you are and tightens his grip on your ass, but you’re already one step ahead of him. repositioning yourself, you let your slick folds slide against the length of his cock as you continue pumping him, lubricating him with your own arousal.
the room is filled with desperate sighs. you’re grinding your clit over his tip when it becomes all too much for yukhei, who wants to be deep inside you already.
“baby,” yukhei mutters, squeezing your ass cheeks which elicits a loud gasp from you. “need to be in you now. please.”
the urgency in his voice prompts you to lean forward and stable yourself with a hand pressed to his chest. yukhei watches you guide his cock towards your opening before sinking onto him in one go.
“fuck.” his throat goes dry at the feeling of your soaking walls enveloping all of him and his jaw slackens as he takes a few moments to appreciate how it feels to be buried in you.
“yukhei,” you whine. “it’s hot.”
he watches you shrug his jacket off, letting it hang past your shoulders in a teasing manner. at this point, he just wants to rip it off you. but all he manages is a guttural groan before running his hands up and down your thighs.
“you’re driving me insane, baby.”
you giggle softly at his words, the sound ringing in his ears and going straight to his cock.
“i love you.” you tell him sweetly and kiss him again. then you plant your hands flat against his lower abdomen where his abs are, lifting yourself off him until only his head is left stretching you open.
yukhei grunts when you drop back down slowly and start riding him at a hypnotic rhythm. he’s too overwhelmed to say a word, too entranced by your breathy moans and the lewd image of your chest rising and falling.
you’re clenching around him in such a delicious way that all he can do is knead your asscheeks with his large hands and let out deep “uh-uh-uh”s.
“fuck,” yukhei hisses as he watches you arch your back, moving you hips differently to get the perfect angle.
“let me take over, baby.”
yukhei plants his feet flat on the mattress just as he feels a familiar tight feeling in his balls. you oblige right away and collapse against him, ready for him to fuck you senseless.
pressed chest to chest, he grips onto your ass firmly as he starts pounding into you from below.
the scent of passion and desire wafted through the air. his cock leaves and enters you at a brutal pace, the sound of skin slapping only getting more erratic with your cries for his name right by his ear.
“yukhei…” you cry weakly as his tip nudges your sweet spot again and again.
“i’m here, baby. gonna come inside you, you want that?”
“y-yes. miss you filling me up.”
yukhei curses, and you reach your high just seconds before he does. your entire body shakes in pleasure before he comes into you, flooding your insides with his warm release. he groans as you ride out your high and roll your hips, the feeling of you being warm and full all too heavenly.
after a short while of nothing but heavy breathing as the both of you succumb to a blissful state, yukhei removes the jacket hanging off your elbows and rolls you over with his softening cock still snug in you. he hums in satisfaction, nuzzling his face against your neck as your fingers comb through his hair.
“i love you.” yukhei sighs contentedly. “didn’t get to say it back just now.”
he hears you hum softly and feels a peck on his forehead. when he gains the energy to pull back and look at you, he finds your eyes already on him, half-open in adoration.
“i’ll clean us up, okay?” yukhei asks softly, his elbows pressing against the mattress as he moves to get up. he’s sure there’s already a mess on your sheets.
“no, don’t go.” you murmured, tightening your thighs around his hips in an attempt to lock him in place. you end up pushing him deeper into you instead, making him hiss. “stay like this for a bit.”
yukhei notes the clinginess in your voice and the way your hands trace love patterns along the curves of his back. he lies back down, joining your lips in a deep kiss.
“i’m not going anywhere.”
it’s so easy for him to do whatever you say, he realises. you have him wrapped around your finger because you’re just as clingy as he is — and only he gets to see that side of you.
--
yukhei had sex with you for the first time in a hotel overlooking the ocean.
it had been his first holiday with you. every december, yukhei would fly back to his mum’s hometown in thailand with his family to visit his relatives — that wasn’t anything new. what was new though, was you tagging along after his mum had enthusiastically asked you to join them.
the week-long trip was the most fun yukhei had in years. minus the shy introductions and teasing from his relatives who were overjoyed to finally meet his pretty girlfriend whom they’ve heard much about over phone calls, it was like a mini honeymoon for the two of you.
after catching up with his cousins in the first half of the trip, yukhei spent all the other days ‘having fun by yourselves’ as his mum had insisted. you ended up exploring the coastal town, hanging out at the beach, and eating the local food to your heart’s content.
the highlight of the trip for yukhei though, was finally being able to make love to you. the resort stay was a godsend opportunity after the many interruptions during your steamy makeout sessions in yukhei’s tiny bedroom. it was the perfect time and place that you both needed.
yukhei swore you were a goddess as you laid on the bed with your legs spread out, your hair fanned out against the pillows, patiently waiting for him to put the condom on.
it was his first time seeing all of you, your curves and body marks displayed to him like a work of art in a museum. he couldn’t look away, couldn’t ignore how rosy your face was from coming apart on his fingers just minutes earlier.
“is this okay?” yukhei asked tenderly, pausing when he stretched you out halfway. “can i go deeper, baby?”
you nodded fervently though the tense look on your face made yukhei unsure. he really wanted you to enjoy this too. sensing his hesitation, you pulled him down for a deep kiss.
“so tight, fuck—” yukhei mumbles against your lips as he pushed himself further into you, his hands caressing the underside of your thighs.
yukhei sighed, the pressure to not come quickly making him slightly nervous. it was difficult not to when your walls were warm and hugging his cock like a glove, letting him experience euphoria like never before.
“beautiful.” his voice gentle as he gave you an open-mouthed kiss. “all mine.”
as soon as you signalled for him to move, yukhei took charge, thrusting into you slowly as he gauged your reaction. his pace quickened after a while a combination of sighs and moans spilled from your mouth. your neck arched against the pillows, presenting him with the perfect location for a love mark.
but yukhei was distracted. he couldn’t take his eyes off your soaking core, couldn’t get over the way you stretched open to welcome him each time his cock slid all the way back in. he had seen his fingers disappear in you before so many times, but this image was incomparable.
“so deep,” you said breathlessly, your fingernails digging crescent moons into his back.
yukhei looked at you. from the hair that stuck to the side of your neck to your lashes fluttered shut in pleasure, you were a sight to behold.
“yeah?” he kissed you sloppily. “does it feel good?”
“yes—oh!” you whimpered just as yukhei’s fingertips landed on the sensitive bundle of nerves right above where you and him were connected.
he drew circles on it with his thumb, groaning when you clenched around him. “you feel so good around me too, baby. you’re doing so well.”
yukhei’s thrusts grew uneven as he coaxed you into your orgasm. by the time he shot his release into the rubber, you came undone beneath him too, crying out in rapture one last time as your thighs shook intensely.
a moment of silence hung in the air as your pants slowly faded into deep and slow inhalations. seeing you come all over him, because of him, gave yukhei’s ego a huge boost. it didn’t help that you were trembling in sensitivity while he cleaned you up as gently as he could and muttered praises into your ear.
“yukhei,” you called him softly and he halted his movements, worried that he had accidentally hurt you.
“i don’t know if i can go out tomorrow.” you mumbled, covering your eyes with the back of your hand.
yukhei instantly relaxed, a smirk taking over his face as he threw the wet wipes aside. “we don’t have to go out, but i can carry you wherever you like.”
when you didn’t respond, he crawled over you and pulled your hand away. you avoided his gaze, looking at his chest instead.
“i’m serious, baby.” yukhei tilted your chin up and looked into your eyes as genuinely as he could. “we can stay in all day if you want.”
“okay. sounds nice.” your hand quickly hovered over your face again.
the smirk on yukhei’s face softened into a smile. it was amusing and adorable to him, how you could still be this shy after the night’s events. he felt as if he was in heaven and within the next second, he was placing kisses everywhere on your face but your lips. when you broke into a fit of giggles, yukhei couldn’t help but keep going. he finally stopped when your hands framed his jaw, guiding his plump lips back to yours for a short, innocent kiss.
“thank you for being so patient with me tonight.” you paused, swallowing a lump down your throat. “it was nice even though i’m a little sore now.”
yukhei’s heart grew three times at your words.
“is that all? just nice?” he smirked.
you pinched his bicep playfully and hid your face again, muttering something about him being so annoying.
“i’m playing with you,” yukhei giggled, pretty sure he had hearts in his eyes as he looked at you. “love seeing you get all shy for me like this.” and with that, he pulled your hands apart and trapped them against the pillows.
just as he was about to kiss away the pout on your lips, the sound of a door slamming shut thundered down the hallway and echoed in the room, sending both of you into speechlessness.
yukhei put his boxers on hurriedly, rushing to the balcony and sighing in relief when he noticed the lights in the next room a distance away had just turned on — a sign that his parents, who had been out the entire evening, have just gotten back. at that moment, he couldn’t be more thankful that his plans for the night turned out well. he wouldn’t know how to face his parents if they overheard him and you, and just the sheer thought of it brought goosebumps to his arms.
“are they back?” you asked nervously, pulling the covers up to your chin.
yukhei nodded, turning the bedside lamp off before cuddling up to you. “we have to be quiet.”
“oh, we will be.” you yawned, making him smile and hug you more tightly. you responded by wiggling around in his embrace. “yukhei, i’m sticky.”
“don’t care.” he whispered against your skin. “just wanna hold my baby like this.”
after a few more indulgent kisses and sweet nothings were exchanged under the moonlight, you dozed off in each other’s arms.
the next morning, yukhei woke up to the sound of waves crashing onto the shore. you were already awake and sitting up with the covers wrapped around you as you silently admired the swaying palm trees outside. yukhei sat up sluggishly, planting a kiss on your shoulder.
you turned around to return a kiss to his lips, eyes still closed when you pulled away, the intimacy of last night clearly still in the air. you opened your eyes, looking completely lost in him just like he was in you.
“good morning to you too.”
the rest of the day was slow and relaxed. you both agreed to stay in the resort, and so the afternoon flew by as you lounged by the pool and dined at the restaurant next to the beach. safe to say, the sight of you in a bikini all day led to another intimate, even raunchier night.
--
yukhei thinks he’s ready to move in with you.
maybe it sounds a little impulsive. but that’s because there haven’t been a lot of opportunities for the two of you to live together, with yukhei studying at another university and you living in a shared apartment over the past few years.
but staying at your apartment over these few days has given yukhei a sneak peek of life under the same roof as you, and he loves it so much that he wants to be done with his enlistment duties and fast forward to the part where he gets to share a home with you already.
yukhei wants to wake up past noon on weekends and whip up a hearty brunch with you, wants to spend the rest of the day helping you with mundane tasks like laundry and watering all your plants.
yukhei wants to be there for you on days where you’re exhausted from grad school life, when you turn down his pleas for you to take a break despite being drained from staring at your laptop screen. but he’ll massage your tensed shoulders, take your glasses off, and pull you to bed where you doze off to his soothing back rubs and soft praises of how proud of you he is and how well you’re doing.
he craves that kind of domesticity even right now as you lay on top of him, your limbs entangled comfortably and your cheek squished against his chest while your eyes are glued to the great gatsby playing on the tv.
there aren’t any plans to go out today due to the simple fact that you were both too lazy to get dressed and leave the house unless it’s for food. and probably because, though you wouldn’t admit it openly, you want him all to yourself — which is fine because yukhei feels the exact same towards you.
the living room is hushed as you and him watch a drenched gatsby reunite with daisy in a lavishly decorated flower-filled cottage. you sit up just as the scene ends, elbowing the couch as you rest your chin on your palm.
“why are you looking at me like that?” yukhei asks. there’s an unsure look on your face that he can’t quite read.
“i think i remember.” you hold your other hand up, flashing the ring that has been making you so happy. “thailand?”
yukhei grins brightly, the top row of his teeth showing. he nods proudly, taking your hand in his to look at the ring — a thin gold band with a pale blue sapphire — and admire the way it gleams in the afternoon sunlight.
it’s just as beautiful as the first time he saw it in that gift shop in thailand.
yukhei remembers that day vividly. it was the last day of the trip, and both of you were shopping around for souvenirs for your friends back home. he caught you admiring a few vintage jewellery pieces by yourself as he stood in the corner of one of the many shops you stepped into that day, pretending to be interested in some touristy postcards. though it didn’t seem like much to him at first, he later noticed that you picked up the same ring a few times, looking back at it even as you walked away.
eventually, thanks to what he could say in his broken thai, he managed to charm the shop owner into reserving that very ring for him. yukhei secretly returned for them while you thought you were waiting for him to be done in the bathroom at a cafe. he felt a little bad at first, but he knew it had to be done or else he’d regret it so much in the years to come.
yukhei always imagined what the ring would look like on your finger. its design enthralled him when he first examined it up close and he quickly understood why you took such a liking to it — after all, anything vintage was right up your alley. little did he know it would look even more beautiful sitting on your ring finger.
“oh my god.” you let out a huff of disbelief as soon as he finishes explaining everything.
you’re speechless as your eyes flick back and forth between the ring and the coy look on yukhei’s face. this is the reaction he has been waiting for.
“yukhei.” your voice is fragile, like you’re about to cry any moment.
the smirk on yukhei’s face drops immediately. he does not like hearing his name from you like that.
“what’s wrong?”
“nothing,” you smile weakly, quickly brushing away the tears that escaped your eyes with the back of your hand. “i just love you so much.”
“and i’m going to miss you. a lot.” you continue before he gets to reply. “every day. all over again. i miss you already.”
“oh, baby.” yukhei croons as he wraps his arms around you, pulling you down for a tight hug. he rubs your back, feeling helpless at the sound of your sniffles.
yukhei knew this would happen. of course he did. he’s struggling just as much as you are to ignore the impending distance you’ll both have to deal with again — maybe that’s why he was clinging onto the idea of a future with you so tightly.
“we’ve talked about this. the sooner the better, right? ” yukhei says sadly, finding it hard to agree with himself.
“i know, i’m just being emotional again. i’m sorry.” you chuckle unhumorously. “i didn’t think i’d get to see you before the year ends, you know? but you came back. you’re actually here and i’m so happy.”
“and,” you prop your arm up on his chest, the promise ring once again in yukhei’s view. a moment passes as the two of you stare at it — the symbol of your love and future.
“i love you so much. i want to live the rest of my life with you, like the past few days.” you say resolutely.
yukhei is overwhelmed with happiness, love, and nostalgia all at once. suddenly he’s transported back to that park where you first kissed as teenagers, where he first found out that you liked him too. but loving someone and knowing that they love you back so much so that they want to be with you forever is something so much more special. it’s a privilege yukhei never thought he’d have.
and now, he does. as he looks into your eyes, he realises that you’ve blessed him with that privilege, and that you’re truly the best thing that has ever happened to him.
yukhei finds himself unable to express in words just how he feels at this moment. so he shifts your bodies around until you’re lying side by side, until all he sees is your face up close. he cups your tear-streaked cheeks before softly brushing his lips against yours, sinking in the warmth that blossoms in his chest.
“i love you.” he says delicately when he pulls away, tugging a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “i’m so glad the universe chose you for me.”
the fond smile on your face falters as a tear rolls down your cheek and your bottom lip begin to quiver, the violins playing in the long-forgotten movie adding more melancholy than needed to this moment.
yukhei’s heart breaks as he watches you avoid his gaze and desperately blink away the tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. but he knows that you two will make it, that the distance is merely temporary. and he knows you know it too. what you and him have is so strong.
“hey, look at me.” he whispers.
you turn towards him, your eyes curiously examining his face.
“i’m gonna come home. to you.” yukhei places a kiss on your forehead. “and it won’t be long. think about it baby, i’ll be out this time next year and we could be living together by then.”
“i can’t wait for that.”
“me too. you’ll get to wake up next to me everyday, but you’ll have to teach me how to not burn our pancakes for breakfast until they’re perfect.”
at last, the corners of your lips twitch and you chuckle into the sleeve of your sweater.
“how does that sound?”
“waking up to you everyday or the pancakes?”
“me coming home. and us living together.”
“like a dream come true.”
a moment passes as you smile at each other in a placid silence.
yukhei cups the side of your face with one hand, brushing over your cheekbone and memorising every little detail that adorned your face and made him feel at home no matter where he is. you lean into his touch, reveling in the warmth of his palm.
the fact that he only has one more day until he will have to wait months before he gets to be with you like this again makes his heart swell in longing. so he holds you close, enjoying the moment while he still can.
--
the first time yukhei told you he loved you, it was an accident — not really.
that morning, he was awoken by a ball of fur nuzzling against his bare shoulder.
he opened his eyes, looking around the room for a good minute before spotting a familiar siamese cat that was perched at the foot of the bed and observing him with its soft gloomy eyes like it had been waiting for him to wake up for the longest time.
“good morning, louis.”
the cat meowed once as if announcing its disappointment in yukhei before hopping off the bed and making its grand exit by squeezing through the slim door gap.
yukhei shrugged, reaching for his phone that had been charging on the nightstand right by the bed. a quick look at the time and date on his lock screen refreshed his memory, vaguely reminding him of the events of the night before.
he crashed against the mattress and let out a muffled groan into the pillows, shuddering at the thought of how much alcohol he had downed. he was absolutely regretting his idea of not having a birthday party, but instead an entire night of drinking to celebrate turning his legal age.
his final hours of being seventeen were fun, though. ten, kunhang, and a couple of other friends brought him to an upscale steakhouse located in the city’s nightlife district. but like every other boys’ night out, the night eventually descended into borderline chaos. in last night’s case, they went through too many rounds of drinking games and yukhei soon came to the realisation that he was the type to get all giggly and sappy when intoxicated.
yukhei threw the covers over himself and ignored the dryness in his throat, ready to slip back into slumber but he couldn’t. something felt off. he grabbed his phone again and there you were, smiling back at him in his lockscreen wallpaper.
oh no.
flashbacks of how he had asked for you last night and proudly claimed that you were “the one” for him came running back to him. he quickly unlocked his phone, checking his text messages.
[to: ♥][sent at 1:55AM]
hey baaby
baby
i miss u ;(
ii'm still with ten and. kunhang
he mahde me drink so muhch hheheehe
babyy reply me plz
i can seee u readin all of thiks :(
i miss You
[from: ♥][sent at 1:56AM]
oh my god yukhei
are you okay?
wru now???
[to: ♥][sent at 1:58AM]
hi bab
im OK
at tens place now…
he has 2 catss. theyre so Cute
anyway
i need to tell u sometxhing
its rneally imbportant
and that is i love u
u make me so happi
u r so pretttyjf n soooo smart
ur alsoreally kind.. lwiterally an angel
hdeheheheheheee
im so lucky to be youre boyfrjend
becayuse i get to see Ur smile everyyday. hold your hand whenegver i want
onlyi can call u Baby
did u know ?
i bet u djd not ;)
i l o v e LOVE you
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
[incoming call from: ♥]
declined.
[incoming call from: ♥]
declined.
[from: ♥][sent at 2:00AM]
why aren’t you picking up yukhei
you’re making me worried now
are you okay :(
[to: ♥][sent at 2:15AM]
hey _____, ten here. don’t worry about xuxi! he just passed out on my couch.
[attachment: 1 image]
i’m just gonna let him crash here tonight since my parents aren’t back anyway. feel free to pop by in the morning btw, i think he would be really happy. and sorry for texting you at this hour!! goodnight :D
yukhei stared at his phone screen blankly, the jumbled letters of his drunk texts burning into his eyes. there was also that picture of him sprawled across the leather couch in ten’s living room in deep slumber, with his shirt completely unbuttoned and a party hat strapped to his forehead like a unicorn.
“morning, birthday boy.”
yukhei’s heart jumped. he jammed his thumb against the button on the side of his phone, turning around to find ten’s head poking out of the door.
“how are you feeling?” ten asked. yukhei sat up immediately when he saw a glass of water in his friend’s hand. “like shit, i’m guessing.”
ten sat himself down at the foot of the bed, handing the water to an eager yukhei who gulps it all at one go.
“close enough. i feel like i’ve been run over by a bus.” yukhei replied, coughing to clear the raspiness in his voice.
ten hummed. “well, your girl came over with a lot of food. i think you’ll feel better after eating.”
yukhei’s eyes widened, his voice lowering into a whisper. “she’s here? now?”
“sort of. she went out to get coffee with guanheng but they should be back soon.” ten narrowed his eyes at yukhei, trying to read the look on his face. “what’s wrong?”
“nothing.”
“uh huh.” ten snorted. “you suck at lying.”
“okay, fine. i might have spammed her with some texts last night while i was wasted.”
“oh yeah, i saw those. you were crying for her for at least thirty minutes last night by the way.”
“fuck.” yukhei let out a groan. “let’s not talk about that. not now please, ten-ge.”
“okay, okay.” ten smirked. “only because it’s your birthday. now, continue.”
“i told her i love her. like, love love her.”
“oh.” ten paused, his expression fading into one of confusion. “wait, i don’t get it. is that a bad thing?”
“no, no. it’s not.” yukhei cut in quickly, glancing at the door every few seconds nervously. “it’s just—i haven’t told her that before!” he whisper-shouted.
“i don’t know how she reacted to it! what if she doesn’t feel the same?”
ten burst into laughter right away, his eyes squinting into crescents. “oh, xuxi. you’re so cute when you’re in love, you know?”
“i really don’t think you have to worry about her not feeling the same. but i do think you should go tell her in person soon.”
yukhei blinked, relaxing a little when he realised that ten was probably right. the older male grinned, ruffling yukhei’s bed hair playfully before leaving the room.
in less than five minutes the door swung open again, and yukhei tensed a little when he saw you, almost as if he had seen a ghost. he didn’t realise you were back already and had been planning to sit in anxiety by himself for thirty more minutes.
“you okay?” you chuckled as you walked over and sat next to him.
yukhei hummed as you cradled the side of his face with one hand, your thumb smoothing away the drool crust on the corner of his lips that he didn’t even realise had been there.
“someone clearly had a lot of fun last night.”
yukhei’s lips curled into a silly, crooked smile as you crossed your arms and pouted. your attempt at guilt-tripping him had failed completely, it endeared you instead and suddenly he felt like his drunk self bombarding you with all those confessions last night.
your lips eventually cracked into a huge grin. you threw your arms around his shoulders, doing your best to engulf his big frame in a tight hug which made yukhei chuckle. he loved it whenever you hugged him like that or let him be the small spoon when you cuddled.
“happy birthday bub.” you coo dearly, giving each of his cheeks a loud smooch which made his face scrunch up adorably. “are you sure you’re okay?”
“thank you, baby.” yukhei smiled, his mind completely free from his worries already. “i’m okay, just a little hungry.”
“well, it just so happens that there are loads of yummy things waiting outside. maybe even some of your favourite desserts.” you smirked enticingly as you grabbed his hand and stood up. “c’mon, let’s go eat.”
“wait.” yukhei’s breathing stuttered, pulling you back quickly. “i need to tell you something.”
you moved into the spot between his legs, waiting for him to say something as your hands hung in the air intertwined.
“what is it?” you asked.
yukhei looked up at you, taking in the curious smile on your face. it brought so much joy and warmth to his life and he could never get tired of seeing that.
“i love you.” yukhei said, each word rolling off his tongue so naturally. “all those texts i sent you last night? i meant every single word. i love you, _____.”
your eyes were glossy as you relaxed a little, sinking into his touch when he clasped his arms around your thighs to pull you closer. yukhei could tell you were recalling all those cheesy texts as you bit your lip shyly.
he closed his eyes just as you bent down to slot your lips against his in the most delicate way possible before whispering those three words back, as if they were only for him to hear.
“i love you too, yukhei. you make me so happy.”
“say it again.” yukhei asked, his voice laced with desperation even though he knew it was the first of many ‘i love you’s to come.
your cheek was soft and warm in the palm of his hand. you grinned, closing the distance between your lips once more.
“i love you.”
it was the best birthday gift yukhei had ever received.
--
as the saying goes, all good things must come to an end.
in yukhei’s case, the past five days have flown by quickly and alas, it is the penultimate day of his short vacation.
but he’s more than satisfied with how the week has gone by despite how short it felt. he managed to visit his family, catch up with his closest friends, recover all the hours of sleep he had lost while on duty, and most importantly, be around you literally every day of this vacation so far. he woke up and slept next to you, cooked and ate all his favourite foods with you, and interrupted every other activity with sex and cuddling sessions — and he wouldn’t have it any other way. just looking back on those moments brought a smile to his face.
his thoughts are interrupted when the door to your bedroom opens and you walk in with a small stack of laundry in one hand.
”thank you baby.” he says, taking the clothes he had worn in the past few days, that are now clean, from you. they’re still warm from being fresh out of the dryer, and he gets a whiff of roses when he holds them under his nose.
“you’re very welcome.” you plop down right next to where he had been sitting cross-legged on the floor, packing his belongings.
as yukhei stuffs his sneakers deep into the bottom of his haversack, you look at all his other things that have been laid out neatly, side-by-side, on your bedroom rug. he doesn’t pay much attention as you pick up his wallet and entertain yourself with its contents.
“is this what i think it is?”
you ask, pulling out a small folded piece of paper that was stuffed into one of the card compartments. the look of curiosity on your face morphs into one of surprise as soon as you unfold it completely and realise what it is.
“you keep this in your wallet?”
it’s one of the few handwritten letters you mailed to him during his first month in camp when he, like every one of his teammates, had zero access to their phones and gadgets.
yukhei still remembers how tough that period of time was. being thrown into a whole new environment and expected to adjust to a lifestyle that was the complete opposite of university life was not easy at all. not only was his freedom snatched away, he had to deal with a long list of strict rules and responsibilities dumped onto him. and as if all that wasn’t enough, he had to witness his newly-made friends live through the countless military break-up horror stories he heard from his seniors.
it was a lot, but he got through each day thanks to the camaraderie he shared with his team and those letters you had mailed him, since they were the only form of communication he had with you.
“yeah. it got me through some tough times, you know.” yukhei admits, watching you read through your own words.
each letter was detailed with updates on your life and things his mum told you to convey to him. they all ended with a short paragraph of best wishes and sweet words which yukhei appreciated very much because he was absolutely sick of hearing about duty and honour.
yukhei had no idea he was so sentimental. he’d reread those letters in your voice, stare at your handwriting, and hold it up to his nose to get the faint scent of your perfume. it was like a piece of you — which was what he needed to fight the homesickness gnawing at him.
“maybe you should write to me.” you mumble, refusing to look at him as you slid the letter back into his wallet. “i mean, if you’re not too busy. i would love getting mail from you even though we can text and facetime now.”
“i’ll try to, baby.” yukhei smirks. “my good morning and goodnight texts not enough for you?”
“no,” you drawl, rolling your eyes playfully. “i love waking up to a bunch of heart and rose emojis.”
yukhei laughs, going back to packing his things while you roll his clothes into bundles that would help him save space. after a short while of teamwork between you two, his haversack is stuffed and he’s done.
“don’t forget these,” you hand him his leather glasses case that had been sitting on your bedside table. then you’re on your feet, pacing around the room as your eyes scan every inch of the space, looking out for anything he might’ve missed.
“i’ve looked everywhere earlier.” yukhei tells you before getting on his feet too. he stretches his arms high above him and lets out a silent yawn. “i think that’s it.”
“okay.” you answer in a small voice.
now that you’re done helping him pack, there’s just one last thing left to do and it just happens to be the hardest task of all — you’ll have to say goodbye to him this time, tomorrow, at the train station.
that realisation settles between the two of you, once again compelling yukhei to make the most out of the time he has left. with a sad smile he holds his arms out, instantly drawing you into his embrace like a moth of a flame. you squish your cheek against him, hands locked behind his back as he hugs you warm and securely.
“you need to stop working out so much, your abs are hard enough.” your voice comes out slightly muffled. “by the time you’re out, i’m gonna be hugging a rock.”
yukhei grins at your words, bursting into full-blown giggles when your fingers poke into his sides and smooth across his tummy. the faint muscle lines that were there before he enlisted were now more defined, some even visible through the cotton fabric of his t-shirt.
“you say that like i have a choice, baby.” he replies. “i can’t just sit aside while everyone else does seventy push-ups and ten laps around the field.”
you let out a disgruntled noise and hugged him even tighter, as if you were trying to mold your body into his.
“and you like it. admit it.” yukhei teases.
“i do.” you murmur. “you smell so good, by the way.”
yukhei giggles at how quickly you switched the topic.
“it’s that detergent you’re using. i wish my clothes smelled this nice when i’m there.”
“i’m talking about you, bub. the way you smell. my hoodie doesn’t smell like that anymore.”
“the way i smell?” yukhei laughs. “and i think you mean my hoodie.”
“it’s been mine for a while now.”
“well, wanna give it back to me? since it lost its purpose.”
“okay. i’ll trade it for this shirt.”
you tug on the hem of his shirt as you look up at him, eagerly waiting for his response. it’s moments like this where yukhei wonders if you know you have him in the palm of your hand.
“whatever you want, baby. i’ll give it to you.”
the lovestruck smile on his face widens as he places a kiss on your forehead, drawing circles on your back.
“can i have it now then?” you ask innocently, but yukhei’s ears pick up the hint of playfulness in your tone.
“right now?” he asks.
“yeah. what’s stopping you?”
“oh, i’ll give it to you now.” yukhei tells you lowly.
the cheeky smile on your face morphs into an ‘o’ shape as his grip on your waist tightens, guiding you towards the bed where you both crash against the mattress. there’s a moment of silence as he hovers over you, suavely tugging his shirt off with one hand and dropping the crumpled fabric next to your face.
“thanks.” you whisper.
it’s hard to ignore the way your core is perfectly aligned with his when you’re lying underneath him in a hoodie and a pair of grey boyshorts that have been testing his patience for a while now.
yukhei runs his hands up your thighs to your sides, bunching the hoodie up to your chest. wet open-mouthed kisses are left all over the smooth expanse of your tummy and he takes delight in how hard you’re breathing.
“it’s no problem, baby.” he replies nonchalantly, his fingers pulling at the waistband of your boyshorts. “anything else you want before i take this off?”
you shake your head and shoot him a silly smile, and it’s all yukhei can remember before he embarks on yet another mission to please you with his mouth. then he makes love to you again, his warm touch roaming every inch of your body which he memorises to perfection.
later, when you’re both sated and holding onto each other like two long-lost lovers, yukhei dreams of you again. this time, he’s hiding another velvet box in an even bigger bouquet of roses as he sits nervously in a dimly lit living room, waiting to surprise you when you get home.
the thought of you being his forever is enough to make him smile in reality, enough to push him through the upcoming months of separation. yukhei was more than ready to be done with that.
--
it’s only been a minute since you’ve gotten home but the place already feels too big for one person — which is laughable because your apartment isn’t even that huge to begin with. now that yukhei is gone, it feels as if life has been sucked out of these four walls. it has reverted back to nothing more than a roof over your head and a living space for one.
after hanging your coat up and stepping out of your shoes, you stroll to the kitchen and lean against the counter, staring into thin air with the refrigerator whirring softly behind you.
even though it’s only three in the afternoon, it has been an awfully long day for you. the few hours you spent outside drained you and all you did was sit at a restaurant with yukhei and his family for one last meal before sending him off at the train terminal.
the meal was nice and the send-off was not as bad as you thought it would be. but it was still an emotional farewell and you shed a few tears despite it being nowhere as difficult as the first time he had to leave you.
you and yukhei stood at the train platform hand in hand until the train finally arrived and came to a stop in front of everyone.
you let ten and kun attack your boyfriend with their bro hugs first, followed by mrs wong who affectionately caressed her son’s face and repeated her fifth “take care of yourself, my little soldier boy” of the day, and lastly, a less-emotional mr wong who gave his son a few encouraging pats on the back.
looking around, you were filled with dread as you watched the same thing happen with every other soldier who was hugging their loved ones and waving goodbye to them.
when everyone left and when it was just you and him again, yukhei instantly pulled you into his arms, clearly just as reluctant as you are to face this moment.
this was it.
he pulled back, cupping your cheeks and smiling at you forlornly. you stared back at him, taking in how smart he looked in his uniform and the beret framing his beautifully sunkissed face, and mustered all the strength in you to not cry.
it was impossible. tears swelled in your eyes within seconds and you couldn’t help it, the harder you tried to force them away, the more they wanted to spill out. you silently chided yourself for how naive you were to have wished for a tear-free farewell.
“don’t cry, baby.” yukhei pleaded softly, his big eyes looking watery too. “remember what i said?”
you swiped your tears away with the sleeve of your turtleneck and nodded frantically, not trusting your voice at the moment.
“i’m gonna come home to you. we’re going to live our lives together.”
his voice was soft yet grounded with conviction, calming you down instantly and offering you the consolation you needed.
“i’ll be waiting for you.” your voice croaked and you rolled your eyes at how pathetic it sounded.
“i know you’ll be.” yukhei smiled, gently stroking your back. “and you’ll be getting your first letter really soon, i promise.”
“something else i get to look forward to.”
you tightened your arms around him, closing your eyes to really savour what it felt like to be in his arms one last time before forcing yourself to let go.
yukhei interlocked your hand with his, pressing a kiss to the back of it and stealing a glance at your favourite ring.
“i love you so much.” you said, adjusting the collar of his uniform thoughtfully. “eat well and be safe, okay? don’t worry about me. you know you can call me—”
he intercepted you with a long kiss to your lips, letting go only when you pinched his arm. unlike him, you weren’t bold enough to be this affectionate in public.
“i will.” yukhei answered breathlessly. “promise me you’ll sleep early and not overwork yourself while i’m away. i need you to take care of yourself too.”
“i promise.” you mumbled, locking your pinky with his as you looked around anxiously. “you should get going now. don’t want you missing your train.”
he squeezed your hand to bring your attention back to him. “i love you.”
“love you too.”
and with a final kiss to your lips, his hand loosened from yours, reaching for his haversack on the ground and swinging it over his shoulder in one go.
“text me once you’ve settled down?”
“i will, baby.”
after one last peck to your forehead, he turned around and trudged towards the edge of the train platform, where kunhang had been taking pictures with his sisters while waiting. you stood rooted to the ground as you watched your boyfriend’s figure become smaller, waving at him when he turned around to look at you one final time before getting onto the train.
ten and kun kindly gave you a lift home afterwards. you nearly teared up again when you walked past the parking lot and spotted the two of them patiently waiting for you in the comfort of their heated car. on the way home, they even made dinner plans and insisted you didn’t spend the rest of the day alone — which you were extremely grateful for.
you still have a few hours to yourself before meeting them, and it dawns on you that you should probably take a short nap after the sad amount of sleep you got last night. so you force yourself to stop moping and drag yourself to your bedroom to find a comfy set of clothes.
you spend what feels like hours under the hot shower that by the time you step out of the steamy bathroom, the skin of your fingers are wrinkly. just as you start combing your hair, your phone buzzes, its screen lighting up to show you a single notification.
you whisk it off the table, gaping at the sight of yukhei’s name staring back at you.
[from: yukhei][sent at 4:10PM]
hey baby i miss you ♥
[to: yukhei][sent at 4:10PM]
miss you too :(
you guys back there already?
[from: yukhei][sent at 4:11PM]
we’re still on the train
i didn’t get to nap. kunhang snored so loudly :(
[to: yukhei][sent at 4:11PM]
poor baby…
[from: yukhei][sent at 4:11PM]
it’s fine
your boyfriend is a strong man. a day without a nap is nothing :D
you snort at his reply. the typing icon appears next to his name so you wait for his next text.
[from: yukhei][sent as 4:12PM]
anyway, i left a surprise in your desk drawer for you
i think you already know what it is ;)
you don’t.
[from: yukhei][sent at 4:12PM]
i hope you like it baby ♥
you never know what to expect from yukhei because he’s always surprising you with the sweetest, most meaningful gestures. even the story behind your promise ring has you in wonder still. when you pull open the drawer and realise just what he had left for you, a huge grin spreads across your face and you take a second to appreciate the sight of it. he was truly something else.
there, carefully placed on top of the paperwork you had kept in the drawer, is an envelope with your name on it.
“yeah. you’ll be getting your first letter really soon, i promise.”
you reach for it, immediately peeping inside when you notice it’s unsealed. there was indeed a letter as yukhei had promised. you recognize the lined paper that he clearly tore off from one of your notebooks and assume he wrote this secretly while you were sleeping. the mental image of that melts your heart.
to _____, my favourite girl in the world.
i have been staring at this blank piece of paper for ten minutes now while you’re sleeping so peacefully. i still don’t know what i should write for my first letter, so here’s an old-fashioned love letter from your admirer for life, your boyfriend, and your future husband: me <3
you giggle to yourself like an idiot. it’s funny how a single paragraph could switch your mood instantly, how yukhei manages to make you happy even though he’s so far away now.
was that too cheesy? i’m sorry. you know i’m not a poetic person even though i wish i am. you’ll probably laugh as you read on but that’s okay, because i want you to be happy whenever you read this.
so where should i begin?
how about the first time we met? when i saw you sitting at the back of mum’s restaurant, i had butterflies in my stomach (is this how that phrase goes?) and quickly hid in the kitchen. do you remember?
the smile on your face grew as you continued reading yukhei’s letter. it spoke of the vivid details of all your firsts in your relationship, of the little habits you have that he adores. of the warmth and safeness he feels when he’s around you, of how in awe and inspired he is by you — and how lucky he is to get to experience all that for the past few years and hopefully, the rest of his life.
by the time you reach the end, you’re laughing and crying. you miss him so much.
i love you, _____. nothing else matters. you’re the light of my life and i hope i can keep making you feel the way you make me feel: safe, happy, and loved.
until we meet again,
wong yukhei
p.s. i hope you’re not crying. and if you are i really hope it’s because i made you laugh too much.
you reread the letter again, letting his voice linger in your head for a bit because you’re not ready to let it go yet. then you laid on the bed for a good fifteen minutes as you stared at the ceiling with his letter clasped to your chest, yearning for his presence all over again.
it’s going to be fine, you tell yourself. you can handle a few months without him. after all, you already have. and he’s never completely away from you, you realise, as you hold your hand up and admire the gorgeous ring shining in the afternoon sunlight.
for now, that’ll do.
--
#wong yukhei#lucas wong#wayv scenarios#lucas scenarios#nct scenarios#wayv smut#wayv fluff#wayv imagines#wayv x reader#nct imagines#nct smut#nct fluff#lucas fluff#lucas smut#lucas x reader#yukhei smut#yukhei fluff#kpop scenarios#kpop fluff#kpop smut
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I feel bad for all the nice J*nsa shippers who like their ship for whatever reasons (tropes, pretty art, aesthetic appeal, whatever) and know it's not canon but get associated with the misogynistic Dany hating crowd who act like Jon being attracted to Ygritte is J*nsa foreshadowing because red hair (I guess Jon should fuck Edmure Tully too? Omg give me Dark!Jon getting revenge on Catelyn by seducing her brother!) Tell me something. I'm new to the fandom but was J*nsa popular before the show? And I've heard something about the OG J*nsa shippers being alienated by the new shippers who insisted it had to be canon and acted like the series is called, "A song of J*nsa #danysux." I don't find that hard to believe because I know people who are now ashamed of calling themselves J*nsa shippers. Like, at this point, it's not only rival shippers who hate it. Even Gendrya/Braime/Jon stans/etc have started disliking that ship. You know your fandom is a problem when people who have nothing to do with Jnsa have a problem with it.
me: reads this ask
me: iwastheregandalf.gif which I can't find now but
okay anon buckle up because I am sadly well-equipped to answer this ask but before I do lemme tell you dark jon seducing edmure to take revenge on cat is LITERALLY THE BEST THING I'VE EVER HEARD but *clears throat* ALL RIGHT THEN.
disclaimer: as anon says I have no issue with like the shippers mentioned by anon in the beginning and ngl I agree, I have ABSOLUTELY ZERO FUCKING STAKES in the j*nsa vs j*nerys war and the only het jon ship I gaf about is jon/ygritte and we all know where that ended up I just... have been here since 2011/adwd was over and all the fic around was just for the books under secret lj communities and asoiaf qualified for yuletide and I have... seen... things.... and I actually have like uh had... beef... with some people in there and I know things bc ppl who hated those others told me stuff so anyway *sigh* buckle up anon I'mma tell you the story of jon shipwars through the years
in order, the old gods help me here, under the cut bc this is long as fuck
when I got into fandom also given what numbers were on ao3 one ship was popular and it was sansan. no like sansan was lit. the only asoiaf ship on ao3 with more than 200 fics. jb had twenty when i checked first. jc had like around 100-ish because of the show but sansan dwarfed anything. I posted the first jon/ygritte fic on the ao3 tag and the fourth throbb fic and like the others were all reposts from lj kinkmemes. nothing was popular before the show except for sansan when it comes to huge numbers bc grrm doesn't like fic and it was all hush hush until the show made it impossible to control and that ship was the one with a huge enough fanbase it actually had numbers, so like... j*nsa wasn't popular in the way nothing else was popular until it got screentime on the show
now, that stated, j*nsa had a... fair amount of fic for a rareship which was mostly book-based and from og shippers that were there from before the show and liked it for what it was but literally none of them thought it was gonna be canon, like it wasn't huge or anything but it had a small but dedicated fanbase who did their own thing and thought it was fun/liked the idea but that was it
that fandom had their own niche of hcs that they cultivated and shit except that like... at the end of S5/beginning of S6 there was a surge in shipping for... well obvious reasons bc it was obv sansa was getting to the wall and that would have been all nice and good but a) it was the time puritanical shipping was starting to take root and the 'shipping sansa with sandor or tyrion is hella problematic' rhetoric had started to circle coming from sans*ery shippers mostly but I'mma not open that fucking can of worms here, b) while the ending of S5 had more of a theon/sansa spike, the j*nsa stuff started getting big
now here we have to mention my villain origin story ie: j*nsa fandom had this one stan whose name I won't make because honestly it's been years and if she's still around I don't want her to remember I exist who was a bnf, wrote for... the website that created the whole larry/carol thing etc who was really fixed on this thing that j*nsa was actually canon and started writing extremely popular meta about it. now you're gonna ask how do you know, I know because this person once wrote a meta named 'why robb stark is a dick' and I told her that it was really fucking bad meta and she took it so badly she kept on trash talking me on her blog/her podcast (I was apparently the insane robb stark fangirl l m a o good lord) and like that was when some sane ppl who argued with her informed me in pvt that she was basically harping on the CANON thing when they'd have been okay with like... it being crackshipping and that she was basically cultivating a hoarde of followers who were harping on them/the ogs and basically ostracizing them;
I would like to add that this person - before her tumblr got 'accidentally deleted' and remade it therefore deleted most receipts for, er, her so-called meta which included stuff like ned and cat raised sansa as a sexual object and only wanted to sell her like cattle - had at some point started a round robin fic thing where... some of the characters mocked openly said stuff that some of the og fans had said specifically targeting them and people in that side basically went harassing anyone who didn't agree with that specific notion
now never mind that this person basically coined an entire term to describe ppl who liked white guys and excused all their wrongdoings out of my conversation re robb basically lying about everything I said as if I didn't have the receipts and tried to sell shirts with it and it didn't work and like then she got kicked out of her own website because she was telling her commenters disagreeing pretty shitty insults (considering I was called psychotic for disagreeing with her that time I don't doubt it) I think at some point she stepped back from fandom bc idk wtf she's up to these days and I don't want to, but basically at that point the dam was broken and there was a bunch of puritanical shippers harping on anyone who didn't agree with j*nsa is canon endgame stuff
this also includes an incident when those ppl were like... passing themselves as throbb shippers and ended up trying to tell t*hramsay shippers off the theon tag based on moral reasons and I ended up arguing with all of them (and they were all from that crowd) which in turn landed me in contact with other og j*nsa shippers who were like detached from that fandom bc those same people harassed them away as well ssooooo fun
anyway when S6 happened everyone was high on it and whatnot but I wasn't gonna begrudge them that I mean... you shipped it for years, canon is delivering you, good for you, but then j*nerys happened
god j*nerys happened
aaand basically...... I mean personally I was there like are y'all seriously arguing about the best incest jon ship out there but like basically the j*nsa endgame side was like AH JON IS PLAYING DANY SEE IF IT DOESN'T HAPPEN, the j*nerys obv got defensive af and both sides were sort of alternatively shitting on jon/ygritte anyway and depicting any other romantic rship jon could have as abusive™ and during S8 it just got worse and like I tried to stay out of it but basically from what I'm seeing now idk how the j*neryses are doing but on the j*nsa one it's ah jon's gonna play dany anyway and she's going to go insane like in the show so SHOW TRUTHING EVERY OTHER WAY and like again denying that sandor exists or that tyrion exists and like I barely touch my corner (sansan) but I ended up arguing with j*nsa/th*nsa people on twitter who were antis and is2g it was white-hair inducing and I know for sure the sansa/tyrion shippers were harassed to hell and back throughout so FUN
and even if the show didn't go there now since everyone there banked on the jnsa endgame thing and admitting you're wrong is like... not a thing, they still haven't let go of it and attach to that ship any shred of evidence which honestly is grasping at straws half of the time (like... the sansa/alysanne parallels like guys please no) and which is why every other ship is starting to get fed up, attaching canon proof of stuff from other ships onto theirs see that batb argument and jb is platonic but jonsa is not nvm taking all the sansan stuff and throwing it on j*nsa but then denying that sansan has canon evidence (like guys I had to read sansa touching his shoulder when saying gregor wasn't a true knight wasn't meaningful and we were seeing things please) and blah blah blah
this also goes hand in hand with the fixation on like... villanizing dany at all costs and like is2g I have zero investment in dany or her storyline I don't even remember it and I don't particularly care abt her either way and sure af I'm not for j*nerys endgame but like.... some stuff I read is completely excessive esp when fixing on how she's a completely mad tyrant who's gonna have to be put down and like... guys no
(also there's some srs stannis hate in that corner which I honestly don't get why they even care abt stannis but I had to read stuff like ppl don't recognize that dany and stannis are the real villains in this saga and like........ idek)
I think most of the og shippers are gone or don't ship it openly bc they don't want to be attached to the drama but like I also think they're pissing off everyone else bc like... I mean a bunch of them also were down with sansa being paired with other ppl as long as it meant a good ending for her except those ppl were... like everyone but the ppl she has actual contact with in canon which meant that at some point sansa/gendry was a thing and like.... you can imagine why arya/gendry shippers & arya stans were fed up, and there's also this tendency to behave like sansa is the center of the entire saga which like these books is named a song of jon snow basically can we pls make peace with it and personally I've had it with both j*nsa and j*nerys people since they started with that dumbass JON/YGRITTE WAS AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP rhetoric but I'm also fed up with the total ignoring that sandor exists/depicting us as delusional and honestly I also was by proxy fed up from the harassing of the sansa/tyrion shippers soooooooooooo
there were also instances of 'well theon is an acceptable choice other than jon bc he can't threaten her' which... i mean we all know what that meant and I'm not even commenting it bc it's one AM and I have no force to but I don't have to explain why it's not a progressive take now do I
there were also metas about how cousin incest being legal in half of the world means that jondany is a worse incest and j*nsa doesn't count as such and I was basically there like guys please just fucking own up to it but honestly I chose to forgot where I read that and I couldn't find the link if I tried
tldr: no one wants to admit that it's not gonna be endgame which considering the amount of fic they have on ao3 is imvho useless bc they have more content than like.. anything I ship that's not jb or that's actually like canon *cries in joncon/rhaegar but I mean renly/loras is canon and has less fic than them* so idk what's the problem with enjoying that instead of insisting it's gonna be canon when not even the show validated it while show truthing anyway when the only show truthing that can be truthed is the small council made of minorities and possibly jon eventually fucking off with the wildlings but not like that but like most people who thought it wasn't gonna be endgame had left/were made to leave by the time S7 rolled by and at this point since wow isn't out yet everyone is fandom-grasping at straws to find stuff to discourse on and we're here beating dead horses *shrug*
so that's... how it is but I would again like to point out that I don't judge ppl on their shipping, I don't particularly care about this entire feud bc I only ship jon with ppl he's not related to in whichever way and I try to stay out of this mess bc I don't really care to argue with ppl who have already decided to bend canon to whatever they want and will have to realize that it's not what grrm wrote at some point but like I have a very good memory and the above rant is as objective as possible also bc again I don't literally have a stake in that race I just think romantic/endgame j*nsa is not a thing and that ppl should stay in their lane and not harping on other ppl who ship whatever in general but especially when their ship is the most popular thing in fandom in the first place /two cents
#1#2#3#4#5#anonymous#ask post#anti-jonsa#anti jonsa#anti-jonerys#anti jonerys#both of them for equality
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Soft Alphabet - Four
a/n: reposting bc it disappeared from tags 🙃 tumblr’s being a bitch again ugh
∙∙∙
A - Affection (how do they show affection)
four gives you looks that mean everything. sure, it may not seem like a lot, but when you two first got together and were sneaking around, the looks and glances he gave you to silently tell you that he cares for you meant everything. he’s not really good with his words, and he can’t really go out and buy you stuff that you want, in the beginning. so looks are the only thing he has. he can say so much with his eyes, you can tell when he’s admiring you deeply and thinking about how much he loves you.
B - Balance (how do they balance you, work/school/life?)
you two spend everyday together, basically, so there is no balance. you spend every waking minute with one another and the group. but you do try to spend time alone or with other group members, away from one another, just to have a break. but, at the end of the day, you are back with one another, enjoying dinner, chatting about what you did that day.
C - Cuddles (do they enjoy cuddling? what positions?)
cuddles come after very stressful missions. when both of you two are exhausted and just need to relax, you’ll head to his trailer and just fall onto his bed, curling up with one another. the lights usually stay off, if it’s at night. if it’s during the day, he makes sure to shut all the blinds so the least amount of light can get through. you two usually stay quiet, just wanting the comfort of one another after a hard day, but sometimes, he’ll ask you stuff here and there.
D - Date (what was your first date?)
he has five and two help him make a nice dinner for you two in his trailer, after months of just sneaking around and seeing one another in your trailers. he could have just ordered food in, but he wanted it to be special. since two cooks the best and five knows how to set things up so you would like it. she helps with decorating the dingy trailer, making the table look presentable and setting out some wine and roses. it’s a really nice night, honestly. four is pretty nervous and it shows, but he lightens up as the alcohol begins to course through him. overall, you two have a great time, and end up in bed together anyways.
E - Excited (how excited do they get when they see you/are with you?)
he tries to keep the excitement down, but on the inside, he loves seeing you. especially after long periods of time, like if he goes on a mission with one or any of the group members, and you don’t go. he’ll wait till you’re alone and he picks you up, spinning you around and giving you kisses all over your face. he doesn’t want the others knowing how in love he is with you, just yet.
F - Fighting (what happens when you fight)
your fights usually consist of you yelling at him for being stupid during a mission. he makes a single near fatal mistake and you’re going off, telling him how he needs to not be so careless on missions and that he should be more aware of his surroundings. he then goes off, saying that he’s been in the group longer so he knows more than you do, and this of course sparks a lot more anger in both of you.
G - Gorgeous (pet names. what do they like to call you? what do they like to be called?)
he is plain and simple, preferring stuff like ‘babe’ and ‘baby’. sometimes, he finds himself using your real name instead of your code name, eight, after you two had a deep conversation about your lives before the group. it’s only when you’re alone, though, with one being so against using real names around each other. but you two trust one another a lot, so when you’re alone, you call him billy, and he calls you by your real name.
H - Hi (first time meeting)
you are recruited to the group well after four’s already been in it. they have already gone through a couple people after seven joined, but none of them worked out. but when you came along, you stuck. but, the idea didn’t take to four. he was expecting you to be like the others, liking the idea for a few months then hating it. so, he was kind of cold to you, expecting you to take his shit and deal with it. but no. you actually stood up to him and declared yourself as part of the group really quickly. he was taken aback, but nonetheless, got to know you better afterwards.
I - Intimacy (how romantic they are)
eh. i feel like four doesn’t have enough experience to be super romantic. like yeah, he’s had girlfriends in the past, but they’ve never been serious enough to the point where he gets romantic with them. his girlfriends were usually against that sort of thing, but when he met you, he loved getting you things, like flowers, teddy bears, chocolates. he’s also gotten you necklaces and rings, rightfully with his own money, of course.
J - Jealousy (do they get jealous? how do they react to you being jealous)
he’s not jealous of one, three, or seven. he knows you wouldn’t leave him for any of them, so he’s fine when he sees you talking with them. the only thing he really gets jealous about is getting to spend time with you. so if you spend the day with any of the other group members, his mood changes a bit, upset at the fact that he missed an entire day without you. but you make up for that lost time by spending the rest of the afternoon and night in his trailer.
K - Kisses (where do they like to kiss you/how often?)
four’s kisses are mostly quick and short. he’s not one for showing much emotion since it’s not something he’s used to, so he settles for little kisses, which aren’t satisfactory for you. but you get it. when missions start getting more serious, though, his kisses become much more meaningful. the first time you have a near-death experience, he grabs your face and kisses you so deeply and passionately. he apologizes for not being very loving with you and promises to make kisses more meaningful and more frequent.
L - Love (when was the first time they said i love you or realized it?)
he realizes it after he almost dies during a mission. you were crying loudly as he dangled from a building, held by the enemy. the only thing running through his mind was you. he wanted to live the rest of his life with you, he wanted to have kids with you, that’s the only thing he could think of. thankfully, he was able to pull himself to safety and push the other guy over the ledge. when he returned to the group, you jumped right into his arms, crying into his chest. he whispers that he loves you over and over again and just holds you close. the group allows you have your time together before you really have to go. but when you get back to your trailers, four doesn’t leave your side for days. and he continues to repeat that he loves you as much as he can.
M - Moving in (when do you decide to move in together)
you technically already live together, so there’s not really a typical “official” story. you spend every waking moment of every day together anyway, but you still like having separate trailers. most of the time, anyways, you’re with him in his trailer, almost as if it’s yours as well. and it’s the same with yours. you two kind of acted like both trailers are yours, and you just spend time in whichever one you want, whenever you want.
N - Newborn (their reaction to starting a family)
the thought of being a dad worries him. he doesn’t want his son or daughter to turn out like he did, so being in a vigilante group isn’t a good start. you two decide to leave and go back to your regular lives, as the people you were before entering the group. it’s a really hard decision, but four is so much happier with the idea; neither of you were in danger and you didn’t have to worry about you getting hurt on missions and possibly losing the baby. the rest of the group was upset they wouldn’t be able to see the baby, but they were very understanding, even one.
O - Open (how open you are with one another)
in the beginning, he’s not very open with you. and it’s for good reasons. none of you in the group are open with one another. but when you and four start getting to know each other more and become more than friends, he feels obligated to tell you more about his life before. so, after three months of knowing each other, you have a long and deep conversation where you two spill everything. your real names, the reasons you joined the group, anything related to your lives outside of being a vigilante.
P - Photos (what kind of photos you take of them/they take of you)
you don’t really have modern cameras, per one’s request, but he does have a shit load of old polaroid cameras. so four takes advantage of this and takes many photos of you. his favorite thing to picture you doing is having fun in the desert. you two will just walk around, the wind blowing your hair as he takes candids of you. he loves how carefree you look and how beautiful the sunlight makes you.
Q - Quirks (what random habits do you have that they love or hate/vice versa)
four has a problem with being careless. he doesn’t care about safety most of the time, which upsets you and makes you mad sometimes. he has that idea that you all are dead so why does it matter? but he rarely remembers that you aren’t actually dead. not really a quirk, but something he does that pisses you off too much.
R - Recovery (how you help them after an injury/vice versa)
four always lets you help him with his injuries. he knows you hate when he’s injured, just as much as he hates when you are. five usually does it, since she is the doctor, but four will only let you help him, unless it’s a serious injury and he actually needs four to save his life. but if it’s a few cuts and scrapes, he gives into you. and he does the same thing. when you get hurt, he’s right by your side, getting anything you need, being very overprotective.
S - Solution (how they resolve fights)
the group usually has to get you two back together after a fight. you take a break from one another, and it’s awkward for the group. so two takes you and three takes four and they lock you two in two’s trailer until you both can talk things out and get the fight over with. after hours of saying nothing, two and three yell at you both and get you to talk. finally, you start making progress, and in the end, things work out. you two then head back to either yours or four’s trailer to make things up.
T- Touch (when they need/want your touch, what will they do? how often?)
usually after very tough missions, four wants nothing more than to cuddle in his trailer and hold you. this happens after every mission, really, but especially during the more dangerous and risky ones, where he comes to terms with the fact that you could have been killed so easily. you don’t even need to touch him, really, the feel of you in his arms is enough. but, you play with his hair when this happens, sometimes stroking his cheek or playing with his hand, tracing the tattoo on the back of it. he needs the reassurance that you’re still alive and very much with him.
U - Up ( waking up with them)
waking up with four is the best. he has his arms around you every single time, even if he enjoys his space when he falls asleep, he somehow manages to pull you into his arms in his sleep. if you’re still asleep, he just presses kisses to your forehead, trying to wake up a bit more before getting up and starting the day. if you’re up before him, you absolutely love playing with his messy hair and stroking his soft skin. he looks so much more angelic when he’s out, and you love it because he usually has this hard exterior, so him sleeping is the rare chance you get to see him be so calm.
V - Vacation (where they travel with you)
your vacations are your missions. you’ve gone to italy, dubai, france, switzerland, all over the world. since you live a life with no schedules, you go wherever missions take you. and you’re more than okay with it. this life has given you a chance to travel to so many places you would have never been able to go to. if there’s time, you two try to explore the city as much as you can, of course staying low key and all that. even then, it’s much more exciting and fun to be in a place you’re not really supposed to be.
W - Wedding (how they propose/where you get married/honeymoon)
four proposes nonchalantly, really. you two would be relaxing on the beach in italy, and you’ve been dating for a while at that point. he just asks what you would think about getting married, and at first, you have no clue that he’s trying to say that he wants to marry you. but once things fall into place, you are covering his face in kisses and saying yes over and over again. but of course, you don’t have a huge wedding, you kind of just elope and put the title on it without a marriage license, because that’s against the group ‘policy’.
X - X-factor (what about you captivated them?)
your strong-willed behavior. he liked the fact that you were strong enough to leave your entire life behind to fight crimes. sure, it’s the same thing he did, but you seemed like you had a perfect life, and you were okay with leaving it behind. he had nothing going for him, so this life was the best for him. when you told him your story, he was in awe of how strong you are and he loves that you are so selfless to help others.
Y - Yawning (how they act when they’re tired)
four kind of shuts out when he’s tired. he doesn’t want to talk to anyone, he doesn’t want to do anything, he just wants to relax and enjoy some quiet time. including away from you. you know that if you mess with him when he’s tired, he gets mad and angry. he’s much more agitated and sometimes, that ends badly.
Z - Zzzz (how you fall asleep together)
he likes his space. which is hard to do on a small bed in a trailer. this is why you don’t really fall asleep with one another until well into your relationship. but the first time you fall asleep beside four, it’s the only thing he wants. he begs you to sleep in his trailer whenever you can, and from that point, he doesn’t care about space. he wants to be as close to you as possible, breathing in your scent and feeling your warmth.
#four#billy#ben hardy#four imagines#four x reader#billy imagines#billy x reader#ben hardy imagine#ben hardy x reader#six underground#6 underground#imagines#fanfiction#fanfic
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c’mere, honey | d.h
BASED ON THIS ASK... can i ask for a like happy fic wit female pronouns and prompt 34? diego hargreeves pls ily -- anon.
WARNINGS: female pronouns used; no physical descriptions of the person are made, but I didn’t go gender-neutral on this one, per the anon’s request. this was written a while ago, but i’m reposting bc tumblr refuses to let anything of mine be shown in tags anymore. :( hopefully this works. x
HE WASN’T SURE WHEN THE NIGHTLY VISITS BECAME A SERIOUS HABIT.
He never did it with the intention to start a regular schedule. It had only been a combination of piss-poor factors -- his late night street-stalking habits, his inability to stay away from the one friend he hadn’t lost yet, and the fact that no matter how bad his night had gone, he couldn’t make it past a minute without laughing at one of her stupid jokes, or smiling at her dancing stupidly in the kitchen in an attempt to make him happy. He wanted to be around her, and his body dragged him to her apartment even without thinking about it, and then...it just happened.
He came to her almost every night. Sometimes he felt bad about it and skipped out, forcing himself to take a break from bothering her. But she scolded him about that every time. Like she actually wanted him there, stinking about her living room and staring at her swivelling form every chance he could. He didn’t really believe her, but he came anyways.
Couldn’t keep himself away.
That night started just as they always did. Diego slipped in through the half-cracked window, and she hailed him in with a loud cry too cheery for that time of night. He used to flinch at her touch; over time, he grew to expect it. Even going so far as to reach for her incoming arms, pulling her to him as tight as he could and burrowing his cold face in her neck. Sometimes, he debated pulling back enough and kissing the soft, sweet-smelling skin, just barely pressing his love into the curve.
“I missed you,” he said instead. The words were muffled by her thick red sweater, but when her arms squeezed a little harder, he knew she heard him. “You good?”
“All good,” she replied. “Better, now that I’ve seen you.”
They’ve always shared a flirtatious relationship -- it built naturally and lingered even when they remained strictly platonic. Maybe it was what he liked most about her. She didn’t seem to bother with the strict guidelines of most friendships. Lines always blurred with her and the way she hugged, how she held his hand and traced soft details into the calloused skin -- how she pulled him to the couch and sank into with his arms still around her, forcing his shivering body to lean into her own honey sweet touch.
She pulled away from him a little, holding onto his gloved hands. Her own fingers danced over the black fabric.
“You’re always so cold.”
“M’sorry.”
She shrugged. Her grasp still held. “Not a bad thing. Just an observation.”
Diego wondered if he should pull away. If he should just pull his hands out of her grasp and throw himself out from whence he came. He didn’t want to ruin her. Pull apart her naturally warm energy with his cold, bitter touch. She was too good...for him, for the world, for life in general.
“Are you alright?”
“Yeah. I’m good.”
Her brows furrowed dark and heavy over gentle eyes. In the back of his mind, Diego imagines reaching out and smoothing the worry lines that formed. He considers letting his cold hands press into her skin. His fingers almost leap forward on their own accord. It takes all his inner strength to hold the eagerness back, to remind himself to keep some distance.
His hands fell limp in her grasp. She didn’t miss a beat.
“What’s wrong? Did something happen?”
Diego didn’t look at her. He knew she would catch the strand too quickly and pull the lie too fast and he wasn’t built to withstand a loss like that. “I’m okay.” But his voice caught, and he stumbled over his own falsehood. “I...just…”
“...just?”
“Tired,” Diego sighed. And he is. It’s not far from the real, full truth. “Just tired.”
Her head cocked, surveying his sunken form. Her tongue clicks; the sound made him think of a hen, and his brain imagined her fussing over him with the grace of a mother.
“You need to sleep more, honey.”
God, he loved when she called him honey.
“Nah? And miss hanging out with my favourite person?”
Her nose crinkled. If he was more alert, he would catch how her eyes glowed dull red in the lamplight, or the way she had to blink away the fuzzy feeling creeping into her mind. He’d later chide himself for it. “There’s no way I’m your favourite person.”
It was easy, though, to just know his answer was right. Not because of the fact that he could count the number of people he liked on one hand, or because she let him show up too late and stay too late and bother her until it was way too early. She was comfortable. He didn’t have to think about what he said next with her, or what was going to screw things up, or if she was going to leave him because everyone else had.
“Regardless of your lies,” she said, cutting him off before a single syllable could leave his lips, “you should sleep. You’re exhausted.”
“I’m good.”
“Yeah, and I’m a superhero.”
“Are you?”
She didn’t laugh at that, just clicked her tongue again before suddenly, out of nowhere, pulling her hands from his grasp. She left him cold and stranded on her dilapidated couch and he just watched, seeing her rush out of the room before he could protest.
“I - is--” the words failed him, because his brain failed to catch up to the point where she left him and hadn’t yet provided a reason why. Diego stared at the point he last saw her go. “Is everything okay?”
THUMP. THUMP. CRASH.
“What -- are you okay?!”
“I--” two more thumps come crashing down, echoing into the tiny living space. “I’m good! Just -- stay there!”
“How the -- what the -- why can’t I come?!”
“--don’t get up! I’ll be right back!”
It took every single inch of him to remain seated. He yearned to rush over, pull out a knife and slice through whatever danger she must be facing -- it’s only her voice that stopped him. The reminder that ‘throwing knives in her apartment is absolutely off the table, no matter the circumstances’. She taught him patience, forced him to swallow the bitter pill and remain in his seat despite the fear careening through his bruised and battered frame.
When she returned, he could see the surprise on her face that she was still there. And even when his heart raced and threatened to pop in its shallow cavity, Diego smiled. Are you proud? he wonders to himself.
“Take off your harness,” she instructed. The bundle in her arms fell to the ground with a decided plop of fabrics; his eyes immediately caught on the brightly coloured comforter, and the mound of pillows she had stuffed into it. “Get comfy, you know, whatever--”
“--what are you doing?”
“Oh,” she said, like she was only just then realising the oddity of her actions. Her gaze flitted down to the blankets, then back up to him. “Well, I just...call it setting up camp.”
That didn’t answer anything at all. “What?”
“Take off the thing-y!”
He obliged, still waiting for an answer.
She rushed forward and pulled her blankets with her. Diego followed every motion. “We’re going to make you relax. It’s cold, and I know you’re tired, and you need to take a break at some point. The city’s gonna lose it’s Knife-Boy if you don’t take a little break.”
He huffed. His gaze caught on her own, sharp and amused. “What, we’re going to cuddle?”
“Don’t laugh, honey. That’s exactly what we’re gonna do!”
“I -- what?”
Her grin is bright and unwavering. Yellow, he mused to himself, just as bright as the first rays of sun or the polkadots on her pillow. “Don’t tell me you’ve never cuddled before, honey.”
“Uh…” Shit. Crap. “Well…”
“Holy shit, have you never cuddled with someone before?!”
He shrugged haplessly, too embarrassed (was this something to be embarrassed about?) to look at her again. “Never came up in life?”
That was somewhat true. Childhood rarely offered moments of comfort amidst the grueling battles he fought with, for, and against his siblings -- and when it did, it came in brief cheek kisses and pats on the back when his father wasn’t looking and his mother saw his face fall most. He never realised there was even more to intimacy of any kind until he left the Academy and he fucked up his first relationship, then fell into another with Patch. And Patch hadn’t craved physical touch like he secretly did, so he pushed down the desire to pull her tight to him and let her leave him cold and high. He never fought for touch because simply he didn’t believe he was deserving of such things. That he was too stiff and wild and red all over to be embraced like a kid.
Not until her, did Diego crave it most. But he fought it and settled for the little things. To avoid hurting her, too.
“Oh, honey…” her voice drips of yellow sympathy, sweet and soothing against his wounded heart. He let it sink into the cut. “C’mere.”
Diego didn’t fight her. He let her pull her in. He watched, almost out of his own body, as she tugs off his gloves and tosses away his domino mask, smiling softly back at him with the gentleness of a dove. Her arms draw an inviting embrace and he would be a fool to not fall into it, even when he felt stiff and awkward in her hold.
“Relax,” she whispered into his ear. She smiled slightly when he shivered, pulling back so she could rest against his shoulder. “Just...relax.”
“You know I got places to be tonight, right?”
“Not right now, you don’t.”
“I can’t just…”
The hand that wasn’t clinging around his shoulders pulled at his fingers; he smiled despite himself as they once again twisted around his, intertwining the slender digits. He fought the urge to kiss her knuckles.
“Lay back, and relax, honey.” Her head curled in, resting more on his upper chest then. He wondered if she could feel the pounding of his heart. “Even badass losers like yourself, need their rest.”
“You don’t have to do this, for me.”
Her face shuffled closer, moving from his chest to rest just where his neck curved down to his torso. He might have imagined it but Diego thought he felt just the slightest brush of her lips against his skin -- soft enough so he could pass it off as nothing, but there enough for him to roll the moment back, over and over and over in his mind.
“Sure, I do,” she mumbled. His embrace pressed even closer. “Everyone needs a cuddle buddy.”
Diego snorted, half out of principle and half because he never thought he’d be in a position like this with anyone. Especially not someone he would trust so indefinitely and without question. Someone who called him honey, without questioning the sounds before they left her lips. He wondered if one could get addicted to a physical sensation, and if he would be the next victim, that he would become obsessed with the feeling of someone actually holding him.
“Just relax, honey.”
And in spite of all his worries and his mind, he obeyed his heart, and did.
A/N - I’m purposely choosing not to reread and reread this because I’ll hate it. I already sort of do, a tad, but...oh well. Not my best work, but I hope this is alright and you enjoy. :)
#diego hargreeves x reader#diego hargreeves imagine#diego hargreeves fluff#tua x reader#hargreeves x reader#female reader#mine
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