#or when i was like seven and had serious rage issues
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i just heard the phrase “she has so much potential if she would just apply herself” in a tv episode and was immediately sent back to being a kid. i dont quite know how to describe that feeling but im already in a bit of a funk bc im already stressed about going back to school after two years off so thats taking over my brain. so just hearing something that i’ve been told by teachers my whole life just kinda felt like getting stabbed. like i wish as a kid instead of telling me i had “wasted potential” my parents and teachers realized that something was wrong and i needed help but no one did.
#i was talking to my mom about when my mental health problems started and i KNOW its easier looking back but she knows when it started#and i just feel a bit upset like. my dad was in therapy at one point when i was a kid. my maternal grandfather killed himself.#my mom has a doctorate! i just feel upset#i wish someone had helped me when i was nine and first starting to experience anxiety#or when i was like seven and had serious rage issues#i wish i had help before i started seriously spiraling!#i wish i got medicated when it was first brought up
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Twst for me pls also congrats on getting 1k!
I first chose Jade. He looked interesting. I kept him around for a bit but it always felt like he watching what he says more than a normal person.
When Leona came, I switched to him. Ever since I've had Leona on my screen. He doesn't use a filter and sees the world for how it is. Life really isn't fair. I could relate to him.
Its probably over between me and Jade. Leona already told me that its best not to trust people like Jade. I'm not going to go begging for a lost friendship or get myself in postion that I dont want to put myself in.
To a everyday person I am quiet, polite, and hard working. I dont mind helping out, it keeps me busy when I'm not taking a nap. I have dark sense of humor and pretty cyincal of the world. But I like to see it as seeing reality. Its simply life will never be fair. I like to plan things and enjoy studying battles from history and breaking them apart.
I'm laid back do whatever one you see fit. All I ask is for a happy ending.
Cat-lover Anon
(I hope you enjoy this, cat lover anon. I decided to take kind of a serious route with it, since you seem to be a more realistic person. Hopefully it's still good 😅 also, as a fellow nerd, I adore that you enjoy breaking battles down. I 100% want to see you and Leona face off in a chess match)
A Tale in Which Leona Looks out for a "Friend", and that Friendship becomes something more
CW:Toxic Jade, Jade slander (I'm sorry, I love Jade, but it's so easy to slander him 😂)
You weren't his.
Leona hadn't been close to you at first. He didn't trust Jade, and as Jade's lover, he figured you'd probably be the same as he was.
That is, until the day you were napping in one of his napping spots, and you sarcastically suggested you both cuddle. Never one to turn down an extra source of heat/extra pillow during a nap, Leona had plopped down on the ground and slotted himself in your arms, while snarking back at you about how this was a one time thing.
Three months into being daily nap buddies and you were the best of friends now. While he wanted to be more than a friend to you, he wasn't a home wrecker. You weren't his. And having so many things in his life not be his, he was okay with that. He may not trust Jade, and he was very vocal about it, but you seemed happy, so he wouldn't push the issue past a snarky comment here and there.
Until you were teaming up to infiltrate the fairy gala. Jade had dropped by to give you lunch as Leona was helping you tie some parts of your outfit. The look in Jade's eyes was murderous as he gave you his usual smile.
"I did not realize you were someone to put your hands on another man's property, hosuewarden. I see I'll have to be more careful about my possessions."
All he was doing was innocently helping you with an outfit. And now he was being accused of who the hell even knows what! But he was more pissed that Jade had outright referred to you as a possession.
Luckily for him, you seemed just as pissed about it.
"Jade! I am not a possession!"
"I know my dear, but…"
"Do you really know? Sevens, he was helping me with my outfit! Get a grip!"
Jade eyes glinted sharply, and he moved in closer to you.
"My darling, what if I were to tell you he was madly in love with you? I've let this go long enough, but you shouldn't see him anymore. I don't think it's safe for you."
And with that, you exploded. The yelling and rage, maybe for Leona's sake, maybe for your own, or maybe for the sake of just being tired of being fed bullshit, filled the room, to the point where it caught the other's attention, and they had to step in.
….
Leona was a good friend. He helped you work through the break up. Helped you stand on your own two feet. Gave you encouragement and built you back up. All he wanted was for you to be happy.
A couple months after the break up, you flopped into his nap spot next to him and snuggled in close. He was expecting this to be a regular nap session, and was starting to drift off, when he heard a quiet,
"Hey Leo?"
He grunted back in response.
"I don't think I've ever thanked you for being there for me whenever I need you."
"It's whatever, herbivore."
"No, it's not," you sat back up, and forced him to look into your determined face.
"I know how much energy it takes from you to do anything. And the fact that you are always there for me, always ready to tell things to me straight, means so much to me."
He attempted to roll over so that you wouldn't see how flustered he was getting, but you held him in place.
Although….he had to ask himself if maybe he really did want to have this conversation since he had more than enough strength to fight you off if he truly wanted to.
"Is there a point to this?"
"Yes," you said with a firm nod. "I don't know when it happened, but somehow I fell in love with you, you grumpy kitty cat. And even if you don't return the feelings, I think you should know that at least one person thinks you deserve to have a happy ending."
He laughed dryly. "You know I don't believe in those."
"I don't either. But…." You hesitated, "maybe we can find one together?"
You suddenly pulled away as though your own words shocked you. You pulled your knees to your chest and buried your face in them.
"Anyway, no pressure or anything. Just wanted to share."
Leona stared at you for a moment, then sighed heavily.
"If anyone can help me find a happy ending, I guess it would make sense that it would be some silly herbivore with bad taste in men."
You looked up and shot him a glare, but he simply smirked and cupped your cheek.
"Are you truly certain I'm someone you want?"
You nodded, unable to say anything as his soft eyes searched yours. He pressed a kiss to your forehead, then threaded his fingers through yours.
"Alright then. Let's find a happily ever after."
#1k followers#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland x reader#leona kingscholar x reader#leona x reader#leona kingscholar#twst leona
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NNT Rewatch s2ep7-12 !!
(Still from my drafts! Just moved back to college yesterday and today and classes start tomorrow. Wish me luck! My schedule sucks this year so I'll need it lol)
man this is flying by!! but lucky me, the druids’ holy land arc is one of my favorites
King learning throughout this season that not only does he need the other Sins, but they need and love him is so sweet. I just love the character development they all go thru this season
draw him like one of your french girls ~~
I love that Matrona has purple eyes like Diane, the small details really make it
I actually NEED to know what Monspeet and Meliodas’s relationship was prior to his betrayal. “I can’t believe HE’S the one who sensed us” ?? Whats that about🤨 also zeldris and monspeet seem to have been in good terms, like were they all friends?
I don’t know how its possible, but Monspeet’s voice is even hotter in spanish
I love that despite galand not being able to lie, they still don’t believe his stories lol
KAJSDKWUDFL I forgot how shocked i was with the reveal that Merlin stole Mel’s power i just love the druid training arc sm
theyre so silly i love them
do we know why jenna and zaneri don’t have wings? are they just hidden with magic or something??
okie so apparently they’re just inhabiting human bodies and their real bodies had wings. found this on the wiki, do we know where the info comes from?
WAIT do jenna and zaneri know elizabeth?? Like KNOW her?
HAHAHA this part always destroys me
ngl the best thing seven deadly sins as an narrative does is portray the intense agony and trauma from mel and ellie’s curses
anyway... the fact that Meliodas and Zaratras were of equal rank when they met is kinda funny
the absolute horror on meliodas’s face when he hears liz is just PERFECT
liz is so slay she’s everything i want elizabeth liones to be
King: uhh hey jenna...🥺 what are you planning to have us do in there😓
Jenna: isnt it obvious??? 🤨 rigorous training 😤😤
the way they cut btwn scenes of meliodas abt to lose it and him and liz being happy is just so well done
I love that they were trying to get Meliodas to abandon his emotions to keep his rage in check and then when he actually has no emotions we find out that he’s straight up evil and much, MUCH worse than before lol
the tears pooling on their insanely pointy chins always gets me lol. but also mel just violently sobbing and then suddenly being fine. Mans has serious issues with repression that can def be drawn to his daddy issues
BAN/ZHIVAGO ARC😭😭😭 a few observations: Ban is very clearly influenced by Zhivago’s style, like the clothes are so similar, the fact that they sent Ban to Aberdeen prison and his favorite is Aberdeen ale makes me think he associates it with his dad, Zhivago was hot, Ban mirrors Zhivago’s words to him to Elaine, Zhivago tells Ban to never trust humans and the only humans he ends up trusting are Escanor and Jericho, zhivago has lived in misery about the deaths of his children for almost 40 years :(
idk why this is one of my fave arcs it’s literally just angst lol
gil and howzer as boyfriends. Discuss.
seeing gowther fight hand to hand is actually pretty cool, i had assumed he was weak like king but he can hold his own
how did king not clue in when galand literally opened with “Meliodas its been such a long time” like BABE CMON
BAN TELLING JERICHO SHE’S HIS WALLET 😭😭
meliodas just mocking king for his lack of wings is always funny. nothing like a dick joke to make you feel better after Zhivago’s death
I HAVE to do a meliodas self hatred/relationship to being a demon post, i have so many thots
I LOVE WHEN HE GOES TO SEE THE 10 COMMANDMENTS HES SO BADASS
monspeet shielding Derieri from the rocks with his cape🥺
melascula is so sassy i love her
estarossa is my deranged babygirl i love him. that fucking freak
I JUST KNOW TAIZOO AND THAT LITTLE TWINK ARE FUCKING
taizoo is a bottom.
meliodas somehow has 15 year old rizz. like the fucking blond boys.
(not so) fun fact: Elaine is my mom’s name so its a little weird
nakaba’s size kind seriously needs to be studied
ESCANORRRRRR
okie doke that’s it join us next time !!
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so Draxum took custody of Bella and Pax after his sister died, right? If I'm getting my math right, Pax would have been pretty young. Was he a good dad then? Did Draxum parent them like Galois?
I'm sitting here trying to decide what counts as a spoiler and what's not going to be super explicit, lol. (though to be fair the big reveal is going to be Leo and the fam finding out and reacting to it, not the audience, y'all already knew)
Pax was around seven or so, maybe a year or two older. And he was pretty independent even then (Bella was protective of her brother but she did not baby him) but yeah, he definitely needed more hands-on parenting. Which Draxum figured out. He babysat before, so he had a lot of the basics down.
What can I say, he fucking tried. No, he was actually a pretty decent parent. He got along with both of them and homeschooled Pax for a few years until he went to secondary school.
His biggest parenting misstep is that he pretty much let Bella do whatever she wanted. Part of it was just the learning curve-she'd stayed with him in the past, but any behavioral issues beyond toddler dramatics were met with calling her parents and having them deal with her. Plus they were both just in a shit place. Draxum was dealing with the loss of his sister and trying to keep it together for the only family he had left, he was fucking tired. Bella had lost her house, her future, her parents-she actually saw her dad die, and it was not pretty. Draxum didn't really feel like he could be too hard on her, especially when she wasn't really doing anything wrong on paper. She went to the classes he enrolled her in, got good grades, she wasn't doing anything super dangerous and she never got arrested for anything serious. He saw it as giving her space to act out, but it was kind of the opposite of what she needed.
He was definitely still the granola mom, though. Maybe a little less so, but he was still into healthy cooking and not allowing them to consume 'unworthy' media. He wasn't as protective as he is with Galois, mostly because he didn't really have to be-he had custody of them legally and wasn't Mr. Warring Warrior Scientist yet, he was still a well-respected member of the community. And he didn't have the same expectations as he does with Galois-Galois was made to be useful and Draxum grew to consider him his son from there, while Pax is his nephew who is often useful to him. Draxum might now consider Galois to be his son first and foremost, but that was the foundation their relationship was built on and it definitely influences Draxum's expectations of him.
Honestly, parenting probably staved off his descent into villainy by a good decade or so, it kept him occupied and gave him something to do other than obsess over his sister's death. It was only after Bella moved out and Pax started doing independent teenager things that Draxum really started letting the rage get to him.
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Yeast Infection No More PDF Book By Linda Allen
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A Direct Order (18+) || A. Hotch x Fem!Reader
Hello my loves! I hope those of you that had a long weekend were able to enjoy it :). Combining two similar requests for this one!
Submit your requests here!
from @all-hallows-reid (which has maybe deactivated?? I can’t find u bestie): How about fem!reader secretly dating Aaron (with a twelve year age gap). She takes a stupid risk and almost gets hurt. Suffice it to say he’s not happy, and punishes her accordingly on the jet or when they get home.
and from @mrandmrshotchner: Disobeying a direct order and Hotch punishing reader for it
I hope you both love this one!!
warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI. Sir kink, spanking, praise kink, degradation kink, penetrative sex.
wordcount: 2.2k
“I see the girl,” you whispered into your comms device from the back row of pews at a church in Mittburn, Iowa, nearly 200 miles away from where this child abduction case had started. “He’s concealing a hand behind her, could be a weapon,” you relayed to the team. The church was mostly empty, the service having ended. A few parishioners and the priest were still milling around, and your unsub, Phillip Rishi, was leading seven-year-old Abigail Torres to the altar.
“Agent, do not engage-- Rishi is devolving and we don’t know what he’ll do. Wait for backup.” You heard Hotch, although you wished you hadn’t.
Technically, you wouldn’t be breaking a rule if you got up and followed Rishi a little more closely-- and Aaron didn’t have eyes on you, anyways. What he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him. So you slipped out of the pew, kept your head facing mournfully towards the ground, and knelt at the altar, Rishi and the girl to your left. He still had her in front of him, concealing her with his body-- so you couldn’t get a good look at her, to make sure she was okay. You made a half-assed attempt at praying, hoping you were fooling the people around you when you tilted your head at a flash of light-- Rishi had a knife, was tracing the planes of the young girl’s cheekbones, and she was crying.
You gasped, quickly diving across the altar and forcing Rishi off of Abigail. He thrashed as Abigail screamed and ran into the arms of the priest. You wrestled Rishi to the ground, pulling the knife out of his hand and tossing it out of his reach before cuffing him and reading him his Miranda rights.
As you stood back up, you turned around and noticed Hotch bursting through the door, his face making it perfectly clear that he had heard everything that had gone down through his comms. Oh, man. You were totally fucked.
Aaron asks if you’re okay, which you are, and then the two of you don’t speak. You don’t speak on the jet ride home, you don’t speak as you drive the FBI SUVs back to Quantico, and you don’t speak at the office before you leave for the night.
You last for all of an hour after leaving the office before you can’t take it anymore. You throw your go bag in your car and take off towards Aaron’s place, walking up to his door and knocking before you can talk yourself out of it. He looks surprised to see you, but doesn’t ask you to leave, which you take as a win.
“I’m here for my punishment,” you tell him as you slip past him into the apartment, and he rolls his eyes-- not his typical, “my young, playful, sexy girlfriend is driving me crazy” eye roll, but a genuinely disdainful “this young girl is too much to handle” kind of an eye roll. A pang of something you don’t recognize flashes in your chest-- guilt? Betrayal? You push it aside-- that wasn’t what you came here to do. “We’re not the couple that doesn’t talk. If you want to yell, you can yell, but we don’t shut each other out. That’s not us. So go ahead and get it out so we can move past it,” you attempt to sound cool and aloof, even if you are feeling a little vulnerable and desperate.
“You disobeyed a direct order,” Hotch says.
“I did,” you agreed.
“What, and you don’t even have an issue with it?” He asks you, his tone harsh.
“He had a weapon, Hotch. And it was drawn on a little girl. What was I supposed to do?” You shot back.
“You were supposed to wait for backup. We hadn’t profiled that he would hurt her,” he tells you, the strain of contained rage in his tone.
“Is that a chance you would have taken? Is it a chance you would have wanted someone to take if it was your son?”
“It’s not a chance I would have taken-- but I can’t take chances with you, either,” he admits, and his confession hangs in the air for a moment. You realize this is his way of telling you how much he cares about you-- walls too high to be truly vulnerable, he has to shroud his disclosure in an argument. “You could have been hurt,” he tells you.
“I could have,” you agreed. “But I’m here, with you, and I’m okay,” you remind him, stepping closer to him, taking his hands in your own to ground him, remind him that everything had turned out okay this time.
It takes a beat, but Aaron responds in kind, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you closer, and crushing his lips to yours in a searing kiss. You smile into the kiss, letting Aaron lead you backwards towards his bedroom as you wind your fingers in his hair, letting your forearms rest on his shoulders.
“Were you serious about your punishment?” Aaron asks, his voice somewhere between a whisper and a growl, and you smile.
“Yes, sir.”
You can feel the air shift in an instant, as Aaron sits at the edge of his bed. “Come on, then. Over my knee,” he tells you impatiently, and you feel a rush of warmth in your core as you move to comply. He stops you. “Pants off. Panties too,” he tells you, and you strip from the waist down before climbing across his lap. He lays his hand against your ass and you feel goosebumps form against his tender touch.
“I think five is fair-- do you think five is fair, angel?” He asks, pulling your head up by the hair so you can look him in the eye.
“Yes sir,” you agree-- he always asked before engaging in any sort of impact play, never wanted to give you more than you could handle, and you appreciated it-- even if five did seem like it would be a walk in the park.
He lands a swift spank against your bare ass cheek and you feel it flood your center almost immediately. “One. Thank you for my spanking, Sir,” you let out almost as if it were a reflex.
“Good girl,” he encourages you, rubbing at the tender flesh before his hand comes down against the opposite cheek.
“Two, thank you for punishing me, Sir.”
“You’re welcome, angel. Just a few more,” he encourages you, his sweet words a direct contrast to the sharp pain of his hand coming back down against you.
“Three, thank you Sir.”
“You belong to me, kitten. I need you to take good care of what’s mine, that’s all,” he reminds you with another spank.
“Four, thank you Sir. Thank you for taking good care of what’s yours,” you affirm, and he delivers your last spank.
“Five, thank you Sir,” you breathed out as your hips rocked, incredibly turned on before he had even truly touched you.
Aaron wrapped his arms around you, moving to hold you close for a moment. “There, sweet girl. I need you to help me to take good care of you-- you are very special. It’s my job to make sure nothing happens to you, but I need your help, okay?”
“Yes, sir,” you tell him, reaching out to hold his face in your hands.
“Good. Color?”
“Green, sir.”
He nods, permission granted to continue, shifting to help you off his lap and onto the bed. “Ass up, slut,” he commands gruffly, and by now you’re certain that you’re dripping down your thighs. You’d find out soon enough, you supposed, as you leaned onto your elbows and knees, raising yourself into a kneeling position, legs spread for Aaron. You heard, rather than saw, Aaron disrobing, which only added to your arousal.
You feel the mattress dip as Aaron pulls himself up behind you.
“Oh angel, you’re dripping. Nasty whore,” he smirks, sticking one finger inside of you, but withdrawing it immediately when you rolled against him. “Ah, ah.” he warns you. “Don’t try that again.”
So you hold still, as he pumps one and then two fingers in and out of you. You moan, cry out, beg for more-- but you don’t move.
“Sir, please,” you pant.
“You can move, sweet girl,” he grants you permission, and you start rocking your hips into his fingers immediately, wantonly, letting out a moan that makes Aaron’s cock twitch painfully. You shift your weight onto one elbow, moving one hand towards your center, which Aaron bats out of the way, slapping your swollen clit.
“Fuck!” you cry out.
“I said you could move. I didn’t say anything about touching, slut. Don’t make me tie you up, too.” He warns you.
Half of you hoped that he would, but you were already desperate to cum and you didn’t know how much more you could take. You doubled down on your thrusts into Aaron’s hand, whimpering and panting the whole way. Just as you were about to topple over the edge, Aaron pulled his hand out of you, and you whimpered.
“Sir,” you said weakly. You hadn’t been expecting that, and you wanted to cum so bad you thought you might cry.
“Ah ah. What do you say?” He asks.
“Thank you. Thank you for edging me, Sir,” you panted out, still coming down from your near-miss.
“That’s my good little whore,” he cooed out. “I want you to ask permission tonight, angel. Color?”
“Green, sir.” You affirmed. “I won’t cum until you give me permission.
“Good, angel, good,” he said, lazily rubbing at your clit, and you whimpered. You’d never come like this, but you’d get increasingly more frustrated. “And why do you need to wait for permission?’
“Because I’m Sir’s dirty little whore,” you moaned out, the words turning you on even more as you attempted to grind down on Aaron’s hand.
“That’s right, good girl,” he said, stepping away from you. “All fours, my love,” he tells you, and you roll up to your knees and elbows. You hear a foil wrapper tear, and without warning Aaron is stretching you. It feels delicious, makes you heady, and you cry out as he starts thrusting in and out of you.
“You make me feel so good, sweet girl. You’re such a good girl, taking me so well and making such pretty noises. Do I make you feel good?”
“Yes sir, you make me feel so good,” you affirm, the words coming out in a shaky breath. After a few moments, you feel the coil begin to wind up inside of you.
“Sir, may I please cum?” You ask.
“No, not yet.” He answers simply, like you’d asked him if it had started to rain, or if dinner was ready.
“Please, sir. Please, please let me cum,” you begged.
“Not. Yet,” he affirmed, leaning forward to paw at your clit, which caused you to cry out. “Are you going to thank me?” Aaron asks, but you’re too overwhelmed to understand the question. “Are you going to thank me when I make you come?” He asks.
“Yes, sir, please please make me come.”
“Go ahead, angel,” he tells you, and the rubber band snaps.
“Thank you sir, thank you, thank you, thank you,” you scream as you buck against him. He guides you through your orgasm, gently brings you back to reality once the pleasure has subsided, holding you gently and whispering words of encouragement in your ear.
“I have to clean you up, sweet girl. Is it okay if I get up, or do you need me to stay here a little while longer? It’s okay if you do. You did such an amazing job,” he assures you, and you nod.
“I’m okay, hon. Bring back water, please? And maybe some fruit snacks.”
He rolls his eyes at you, again, but it’s the endearing kind again, and you smile. The two of you would be okay.
After he cleans you up, you head to the bathroom to get ready for bed, and snuggle back into his arms as soon as you're back in bed.
“I was so scared, and I still had to be your boss, first, and I hate that,” Aaron tells you.
“I’m sorry, darling,” you tell him, shifting so that you’re facing him. “It’s something we should talk about-- me transferring.”
“That’s not what I meant. You’re not changing your career path for me,” he is quick to correct you.
“What did you mean, then?” You asked. Surely he wasn’t thinking of stepping down?
“Well, I was hoping… that you might want to tell the team about us? I don’t want to rush you, so if it’s a no, that’s fine and I won’t bring it up again. I understand the professional risks are--” you cut him off with a kiss.
“I only suggested it because I thought you wouldn’t want people to know.” You tell him.
“Why wouldn’t I want the team to know how much I love you?” He asks, and you smile. Yeah, the two of you would be okay.
tagging: : @bauhousewife @just-a-fangirl-xd @angelic-kisses13 @sleepyreaderreads @ssamorganhotchner @wolviesbbeslrblg @xyzhoneybee@choppa-style @wanniiieeee @zheezs14@ssavanessa22 @isthatme-thatsme @g-l-pierce @ssahotchie @infinite-tides@itsmytimetoodream @hotforhotchner11 @hotchinkevlar @scuttling
#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner fic#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x y/n#aaron hotchner x you#hotch x reader#hotch x y/n#hotch x you#aaron hotchner smut#aaron hotchner one shot#criminal minds#criminal minds fic#criminal minds one shot
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Covert Eyes (6)
Prologue | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5
Fandom: Spooks
Pairings: Lucas North x OC (Amy Holland) eventually
Warnings: Stalking behaviour, anxiety, language, sexual references.
Summary: Lucas takes notice of a young woman, Amy, but his obsession and want to get to know her begin to spiral out of control. Since things have started taking a more serious turn between Lucas and Amy, he realises that his job will always be a problem. He makes a decision which he will later come to regret.
Comments/Notes: If you wish to be tagged in any of my tag lists for fics or characters, please let me know, and stipulate what you want to be tagged in. The above image was located on Pinterest, with no link back to the original source.
A quick disclaimer of sorts: I don't know if MI5 really can get into phone call and text data in the manner used in this fic (I would assume they can). I'm making it up as I go along. The security services are hardly going to make their methods public knowledge.
Amy was terrified for the rest of the day, her hands shaking and her heart pounding. Those three words never had any kind of positive impact on a person when spoken or written in text. Can we talk? Neither Amy or Lucas text each other after Amy had simply replied with ‘Yes. Come round when you’re ready.’
Would Lucas ever be ready? His mind had been ablaze all afternoon; staying with Amy would always be putting her at risk. She knew nothing of the MI5 life, or so he assumed. If Lucas allowed Amy to remain in his life then he would constantly be looking over his shoulder for her as well. She deserved a man who could keep her safe, and Lucas couldn’t. The very thought of never seeing Amy again made his chest compress, and he dropped back into his seat. His lips quivered as he imagined her beautiful face contorting in anguish. Her insecurity heightened.
The wait was torture for both of them, but also kept them apart from a moment they were dreading.
Lucas arrived at Amy’s flat at just after seven and immediately she could sense that their upcoming conversation was not going to be good. She saw him swallow hard upon his first sight of her, and a weak smile curled his lips upwards in an awkward motion.
“I won’t stay long, but I need to talk about things and where we go from here,” Lucas said, his tone low, and just quivering ever so slightly at the end of the sentence.
“I understand, Lucas,” Amy said, her voice almost a whisper. “It won’t work out.”
Lucas’ blue gaze shot upward and locked on hers. “I….”
“Maybe you should have been honest with me before things changed between us. I honestly thought you liked me and that there was something…”
Lucas’ face became a mixture of anguish and deep sadness. “I do.” He stepped closer and cupped her cheek, feeling the warmth of her flushed skin against his palm. “You have no idea how much I do. But, my job…It’s unpredictable. I’m here, there and everywhere. It’s just not something I want to put you through.”
“Why didn’t you ask me how I felt about it, rather than just deciding that this is for the best? I’ve done something wrong and you haven’t even got the decency to tell me…”
“No, it’s not like that!” Lucas growled, gritting his teeth.
“At least we didn’t go on any longer,” Amy hissed. “Please just leave.”
“I’m sorry,” Lucas said, his voice cracking.
Amy could see Lucas’ eyes filling with tears, but she remained composed, despite the pain in her throat becoming unbearable as she held her own tears back. “Please leave me alone.”
***
All evening, Amy sat on her sofa, changing between bouts of sobbing and then staring into space. How stupid of her to get pulled down a rabbit hole and be made out to be a fool. No man would ever dare make her a fool again. Her anger raged, and her heart tore further. She had finally let Lucas in, after weeks of hiding away from him, only to be crushed.
You should have fucking known that your job would be an issue. You fucking arsehole!
The first two days were the worst, and she remained at home, still off work ‘sick’. Moping around the flat in her jogging bottoms and an old band T-shirt only seemed to extend the sadness and pain. The isolation both helped and made her feel worse. Isolation was something that she had become quite used to, considering that all of her family were up in Coventry, and Amy only really had friends from work. All of her long-time friends were spread out across the country, and had their own lives to lead, most of them having children and partners.
Amy stared at the Dairy Milk which was taking up space in her fridge and growled at it. Then she grabbed it and threw it in the bin with a loud thump.
She imagined people’s response to her if she told them about Lucas. You didn’t know him that long. You only ‘dated’ for a couple of days. That was all beside the point in Amy’s mind. Why had Lucas gone along with the tide of feelings that had started to form? If he knew that his job was a problem, he should have stopped immediately and refrained from heading towards a place which would only be painful to return from.
***
The temptation had become too strong as Lucas opened his work laptop and typed in Amy’s phone number, generating her call history and text details. It had been three days now since he seen her in person, and fuck, he missed her. He knew he was an absolute arsehole and deserved to be shot for what he had done, but Amy’s wellbeing was at the centre of his decision.
“Why didn’t you ask me how I felt about it, rather than just deciding that this is for the best?”
Was that really the course of action that he should have taken? To talk to her, explain his job to her. But it went against the code of conduct. Intelligence officers had to keep their job role private, and so far, Lucas hadn’t been involved with anyone who was outside his work life. Amy was completely set apart from the world he was used to. She fed him that normality that he wanted. He wanted a woman who was untainted by the horrors of the job.
Lucas read Amy’s message to a phone number that was saved as ‘Debbie’, her co-worker.
Babe, if it’s not meant to be, then it’s not meant to be. I know you really liked him, but I’m sure you’ll find someone even better.
Lucas scoffed at Debbie’s message. In his own mind, and in his own selfishness, Lucas didn’t want Amy to find someone else.
He continued on through the text messages, and then found the last one which Amy had sent to Debbie.
I’m going to go out after work tomorrow, probably straight after and do some shopping. Maybe even go and see a film. I need to get out of my flat for a bit.
***
The following day soon came, and Lucas waited over the street from Amy’s work place. It was just after five, her usual time of finishing. Employees filed out of the side door, and amongst all the bodies was Amy. She was chatting with a middle aged woman; probably Debbie, Lucas thought. Even from this distance, he could see the dark circles around her eyes. She looked pale and drawn.
He followed. Keeping a few hundred yards behind, but with her in eyesight. Her short stature moved between tall and short figures. Lucas had learned long ago to tune everyone else out and just keep his target in sight. Everything else turned to black and white as the target remained in colour.
Inside a small shopping mall area, Lucas followed Amy into a clothing shop. He noticed that she seemed to look behind her every few minutes. Did she sense someone’s eyes on her?
Amy started off by looking at the handbags, considering buying a smaller one. If there was one thing she hated, it was carrying large bags around with her. But the more she tried to carry light, the more she failed. Purse, keys, mobile phone, notebook, pens, a book to read. It all had to be in her handbag. None of these that she was viewing seemed to be anywhere near the right size. She began contemplating which items to leave out so she could take a smaller bag. It was futile. Everything had to stay. Nothing could be thrown out.
Music was playing overhead. The Police. Every breath you take, and every move you make. Every bond you break, every step you take. I’ll be watching you. She had always hated that song for some reason. It was a dirge that really ground on her nerves.
It happened again. A strong sense of someone watching. Fuck off, Sting! His words were apt. Amy looked around behind, her eyes grazing over rails of clothing. There was no one that she could say looked suspicious. A couple of young women talking to one of the staff members. A couple who looked in their forties, and the man looking particularly weary.
An hour later and Amy sat down to a meal in the food court. She opted for a roast meal, with plenty of gravy and roast potatoes. With a big glass of Coke. Maybe even a dessert later. She’d stopped caring about watching her waist size.
Lucas sat on the other side of the court, his eyes trained like a hawk. He pulled out his phone and began scrolling through Facebook, checking on Amy’s statuses and posts. There seemed to be a few more of them of late. One caught his eye straight away, a personal status, not something re-posted.
When you open up to someone and they just shit on you.
There was a flurry of comments beneath; some people’s names Lucas had never seen before. Probably the people who only appeared with someone else is having a hard time so they can inwardly gloat. People are cruel. He then noticed a man’s photo second from the bottom of the list of names from comments.
One man’s loss is another man’s gain. Chin up, sweetheart. Maybe I can come and make you smile.
A man named Daniel ‘BossBoi’ Hayes. Sounded like a complete twat from that profile name in Lucas’ opinion. Who was he? More research needed, Lucas thought. Then he looked up to see Amy moving.
Lucas followed Amy for the rest of the evening. After sitting through a two hour Marvel film, Lucas let her go at the tube station. He couldn’t be seen getting on the same train as her, but maybe he could hover behind and wait for the next one; stick around by the escalator until he knew she had gone off the platform. So that was what he did.
By the time that she had emerged out of her destination station and exited, Lucas wasn’t far behind. He ran up the escalator, almost shoving a couple of people down the steps. Outside the station, he decided to take a de tour and run, maybe ‘accidentally’ bumping into her.
Amy pulled her arms around herself and looked up at the night sky, watching the stars twinkle overhead. She began to hope, like a child, that a shooting star would stream across the heavens and give her a wish. Just one. To that day, she still always wished on a shooting star.
Suddenly Amy heard her name being said, in a quiet, but surprised tone. Her thoughts had been so caught in that wish, that she never saw Lucas to her left, coming from the adjoining street. She looked at him and felt her breath catch tight. Fuck, he was so gorgeous. “Hello,” she said simply.
“How are you?” Lucas asked, pushing his hands into his pockets. “Can I walk with you?”
“I suppose so,” Amy shrugged.
Lucas could see that she was closed down again. She wasn’t going to break as easily as before. Their last encounter had made her put those walls up, possibly even higher. “Look, I’m sorry for…”
“Please, don’t,” she said, stopping him abruptly. “You made your point, and I don’t want to go over it again. Fine, you’re sorry. Let’s brush everything under the carpet and hope that it goes away, and we can just go back to being strangers again.”
“Not like this. Not out here.”
“You’re not coming into my flat, Lucas. I’m done with all of this.” Amy threw her hands up for emphasis and walked quicker, trying to give Lucas the hint to leave her alone.
Lucas grabbed her arm. “Please, listen.”
“To what? You keep telling me that your job will keep us apart?”
Lucas could see the anger building in Amy’s eyes, the passion in her words burning in her whole face.
“You’ve said your piece, and I’m just meant to go back now and forget a man who I had feelings for and who I….” Tears were in her eyes now and she scrubbed angrily at them with her sleeve. “You might entertain the idea of having one night stands and brief encounters, but I don’t. I was so stupid letting you in.”
“Aim? I want to tell you the truth,” Lucas said. He brushed her arm and held it for a few seconds. “There are things about me that I want to make clear to you, things that I should have been honest about from the start. But I couldn’t be.”
***
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Signed in blood
Yandere!Zhongli x Yaksha!gn!reader
Wordcount: 2541
CW: Yandere themes, mentioned violence and death, unhealthy power dynamics
Long before Liyue’s borders had been established and the harbor bloomed into the prosperous city that it is today, the Geo Lord, Rex Lapis gathered all lesser deities and spirits dwelling in the current nation’s territory and concluded a contract with most of them, ensuring the protection of his country and people. Some of them signed a contract out of fear before archon’s power, some did it for mutual benefit and some out of gratitude and deep reverence. You are in the latter category, a simple forest spirit that was saved from the distorted monsters left after the archon war by his grace and power alone.
It was a simple day when you felt an enormously malicious energy surrounding your green abode, and soon they showed up, killing intent and will of dead archons seeping out of them. You were fast and agile enough to dodge creatures' hits, which couldn't be said about the others. Your fellow spirits and animals with whom you were sharing this forest soon fell victim to the perpetrators' attacks. Dark energy entered and desecrated the lands, poisoned the waters and even possessed the bodies of your old friends.
You were running away, fatigue finally catching up to you, despite the inhuman nature and you soon fell to the ground. There were a myriad of thoughts and feelings reeling inside of you - grief for your now dead friends and home, anger at the monsters and most importantly frustration with yourself. You aren’t human, not a single part of you is, so why were you so weak and helpless, unable to do anything as you left your loved ones for slaughter and massacre?
Guilt and shame washed over you, as you allowed tears to burst free - you were bad, you were disgusting for not doing anything, not helping anyone. Monstrous roars and growls got closer, a promise and a threat of what will happen to you. You closed your eyes, accepting the imminent end and bracing for the upcoming pain. And then the most unexpected thing happened - the earth underneath you vibrated, tremors knocking the beasts off their feet, as a tall basalt pillar rose from the ground.
Soon the stranger appeared, ending the monsters in one swift and elegant slash of his spear. He donned an otherwise simple white attire adorned with golden threads, with a long ponytail showing from the hood, but the most eye-catching details were piercing amber eyes and the glowing patterns all over his body of the same colour. You forgot how to breathe for a second as you watched your unexpected savior - he was beyond handsome, possessing the kind of beauty that would have mortals blushing and stuttering.
He then looked around, finally noticing your sprawled form. “Are you all right?”he asked, his tranquil and calm voice tinted by the shadow of concern and lending his hand. “I am”, you sputtered out and took an outstretched limb, feeling infinitely clumsy and ugly, face heating up from embarrassment. “That is good”, his voice despite still possessing the same serenity took a warmer tone.
As you learned later, you were saved by one of the seven remaining archons, a lord of geo. Filled with shame for your dishonorable escape and gratitude for your unforeseen salvation you signed the tightest contract with Rex Lapis - a blood written pact.
Unlike the contracts mortals establish, a contract between two immortal beings lacks the parchment or ink or a signature, they use magic and techniques that echo directly into their soul, preventing even the possibility of the terms' violation. Blood written pact binds to the vital essences of one, an ancient magic flaring up once the contractor intends to break the agreement, stopping and warning them of what's to come once they do breach it.
Your blood sizzled and boiled as you pledged your life to Liyue, magic singing in your veins and resonating with your soul - Rex Lapis saw the potential in you to be a great warrior and designated you to serve him as one of the yakshas, so you obeyed, training your body and spirit to withstand the endless calamities you no doubt will have to face. One day, after a grueling training you almost gave up, but forced yourself past your limits. I must redeem myself and repay Rex Lapis, you thought, gritting your teeth and taking a battle stance again, and then a miracle happened: a blue glowing orb materialized in the air - a vision bestowed by the hydro archon.
Sometimes you still reminisce about this moment and recite the oath you gave back then - I pledge my life to the protection of the Liyue nation and the will of Geo Archon, Rex Lapis for all the centuries to come.
Soon, you ended your training and started to protect Liyue just like other four adeptis all of whom were also saved by the Geo Lord. For centuries you five defended the nation as it bloomed and grew into something that you couldn't even imagine. And even after centuries of slaughter as your karmic debt started to slowly eat you from inside, slowly, but surely devouring your sanity by the smallest pieces you always found strength to move forward by recalling your first meeting with Rex Lapis, reverence before your God and guilt before the dead driving you further and further.
With time a dull, yet constant pain made its way into your bones. Sometimes it would make your eyes fill with unshed tears, sometimes wake you up in those rare times you slept without nightmares, sometimes it made your hands tremble, almost dropping the weapon in the middle of the battle. You couldn’t suppress and endure it like Xiao does, letting out a pained whimper here and there, yet you still upheld your duty to the Liyue. It almost felt like routine, until two awful events happened: the death and defection.
The fear and hatred of all those who fell victims to your weapons were slowly seeping in your minds, driving you mad with bloodlust. It all happened so quickly: you were watching out for other demons as Bonanus and Pervases were patching up Alatus after the intense battle, while Bosacius looked at the other front, weapons ready, and then Bonanus lashed out, aiming for Xiao's neck. The anemo yaksha quickly darted to the side, but the weapon still grazed the copper bird's neck, his blood forming a quickly growing pool underneath. You had to put the bloodlusted yaksha yourself, something inside of you breaking as you did so - it was one thing to stand against hordes of demons and monsters and it was another to kill your friend.
You couldn’t talk or look into the eyes of the other two after that, despising yourself for yet another failure - first your forest, then your friends, you were helpless to save anyone. And then Bosacius left, you had no idea where he vanished, but these two events prompted Rex Lapis to visit both you and Xiao, as yakshas shrinked in numbers from five to two in less than a week.
You kneel before the Geo archon when you notice his tall figure between the ancient trees - unlike Xiao, you prefer to live in the woods, the familiarity of nature reminiscent of a home you once lost. Your Lord ushers you to stand up, his face solemn and grim.
“[First]”, he starts, exhaustion evident in each syllable: "For centuries you protected my Harbor, and despite turbulent times passing you still uphold your duty. I find that admirable".
Your eyes go wide and you turn your head, unable to receive such high praise from your God, you feel your cheeks heat up at the compliment, acknowledgement of your hard work, and even constant pain or the death and disappearance of your colleagues became less serious of the issue for a mere moment.
"I am not worthy of such praise, my lord, I am only doing my job, fulfilling the contract", you deflect, looking at him again. Archon's eyes crease a little and a small frown appears as you say "contract", yet he quickly wills his face into an impassive mask.
"I suppose I made a mistake when I asked you to be my yaksha back then, I have misjudged your worth ", he continues, voice becoming distant and strangely tense, as he reminisces about the days long past, amber eyes looking both at and through you.
"My lord, I…", you start and then stumble over the words, unsure what to say next. Is this his way of telling you that you're bad at your job? You cast your head down, eyes lowered in shame, hands that spilled adeptus' blood trembling and burning. "I am deeply sorry for letting you down in that way, I will do my best to redeem myself from now on” .
A warm hand touches your shoulder, squeezing it slightly in a comforting manner. His palm is warm and firm, comforting in its steadiness like a tall cliff standing proudly against the raging tides, indestructible and reliable.
"You have no reason to apologize for this. Something like this would inevitably happen sooner or later, you have no fault in the events that occured. I suppose karmic debt would drive one of you insane eventually".
He sounds calming, reassuring, like a parent soothing a child. You still don’t lift your head to meet his gaze - you’re too guilty and unworthy to do that. There are no words you can speak now, not when you have been so thoroughly destroyed by your lord’s kindness - how can he look at you and see someone innocent?
“No, I meant that all those centuries ago, when I first met you I didn’t discern the gem hidden in the crude ore” he adopts reminiscent tone again, his hand now moving on your shoulder in slow and steady rhythm: “I knew I wanted you to be by my side, I didn’t know who I wanted you to be though. I needed time to understand my own feelings and the way I viewed you, and then I needed some more time to accept those sentiments”.
“What sentiments, my lord?”, you ask, finally looking up to him, brows slightly frowned in confusion and curiosity - it’s rare to see the Geo archon talk about his inner workings so openly, as he usually prefers to keep a cordial distance or masterfully redirects the conversation into a completely different direction.
“Over the years, as you protected my nation and my people, I finally understood it”, his hand shifts from your shoulder and now he cups your own two palms in a firm yet gentle hold: “I cherish you, [First]”.
The sudden declaration leaves you stunned and speechless for a good minute: you look at your god with wide eyes, mouth opening several times like a fish out of water. A myriad of thoughts and feelings go through you: confusion, disbelief, inferiority.
“I… That is very sudden for me to… learn about your affections”, you finally utter, forgetting to add respectful “my lord” at the end. Your voice comes off as small and hesitant as you say so. Rex Lapis doesn’t seem to mind your confusion as he takes a second to collect his own thoughts.
“The yaksha title I have burdened you with takes a toll both on your mind and your body. I severely miscalculated, so I want to redeem this mistake”, he sounds regretful now, one hand moving to caress and cup your face. You go stiff, still overwhelmed by the whole conversation. “I can free you from your contract if you decide to become my life companion”.
“But, my lord, it’s so sudden I can’t just..”
“Hush, I won’t pressure you into an intimate relationship right away. No, we will wait and learn about each other and once you will be comfortable enough to let me enter your life and your heart we will marry, uniting our fates with a contract that shall never end”.
You lower your head again, but this time in contemplation instead of guilt and shame. What do you feel for Rex Lapis? Admiration - he is a powerful deity, capable enough to flatten mountains and raise new ones with a single slash of his spear. Gratitude - he was the one that saved you and sheltered you, until you grew strong enough, he gave you a reason to live when you had none. Respect - he is a capable leader, smart enough to build a foundation and guide people of the most magnificent nation in Teyvat.
You feel no love for him, not the kind of love he wants anyway. You know about his patience and how affections sometimes take years to finally mature and bloom, but the thought of spending decades, maybe even centuries in hopes that one day you will reciprocate is nauseating to you.
How do you feel about it? A part of you wants it - it’s an easy way out to get rid of the pain, of the fear and bloodshed, of the death that clings to you at every waking moment. You remember how you spend most of your nights sleepless, drowsiness leaving you the same second you dream of blood and carnage and massacre. You remember your whole body throbbing and burning on especially bad days, when even Remedium Tertiorum can’t do its job. You remember crying and gasping for air after the weight of the slaughtered gets too heavy for you to handle.
You almost say yes, out of these reasons alone, but you stop yourself - you think of Xiao, of how lonely he will become once you leave. You think of heartfelt smiles that mortals gift you with on those rare occasions you have to save them. You think of the slaughtered spirits before whom you still have to atone to.
“I am sorry, my lord” You look him straight in the eyes, bracing yourself for the words you are about to say: “I can’t match your feelings, nor can I accept your offer, not now at least”.
Amber eyes lose their warmth in the instance, the comforting aura he was exuding earlier replaced by the weird tension between you two. Looking at this image, you suddenly remember how ruthless Rex Lapis can be on the battlefield as for a fraction of the second he looks at you as you’re an enemy.
A horrible pain shoots right through your body, and your short scream follows. You fall on the floor, gasping for air, deaf and blind from the overwhelming pain. Geo archon quickly takes your form, carrying you to your sleeping place, as you try your best to breathe and not cry.
“It must be a blood pact acting up, the magic must have taken your refusal as disobedience to the contract”, he says once the agony lightens, enough for you to focus on the conversation, “you did pledge your life to my will”.
You try to half sit on your elbow, to look him in the eyes and say something other than the pained groans and whimpers, as his next words instill a sense of quiet dread in you:
“I hope you will rethink and take back your words out of your own volition, [First]. I would hate to order you to”.
#yandere genshin impact#yandere genshin#yandere zhongli#Yandere#Yandere zhongli x reader#yandere x reader#Yandere genshin x reader#Yandere genshin impact x reader#my writing
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FINALLY SOMEONE SAID THE TRUTH.
I admit that i enjoyed act 3 but it feels like really rushed i have so much complain with that.
The build up until act 2 was so good it give us so much premise but the final blow si meh. Sorry that i want to share thing long rant with you
1. Why the final talk is with yae, no offense to her but we need ei to explain not to mention she witness khaenriah downfall so she can give us more information, i feel like they do it for the plot armor so they can just keep dragging this
2. So many things that quite inconsistant, the shogun is show no mercy to anyone that even did a little thing outside what she think its right, how come she can still have a talk with signora, when sara is falling like that, and also there is no clarification about sara right now.
The traveler was so done at first they refuse to help thoma and ayaka at the beginning. But they seem so happy and forget everything how come they are not RAGE ( okay maybe this is to bias and personal) when this nation provide nothing about our siblings information and also why they are not mention anything about their problem in ei stroy quest. Its nonsense! She is right in front of youu, ask about your siblings, ask about khaenriah, ask about ukmown god!!. How come they can just forget like that. Also mihoyo really waste the potential about twin things i thing ei will give us so much help bcs of the sympathy that we both rn lost our twin but noooo.
3. Kokomi seem lost some brain cell, she make a very succesfull grand intro but she become meh in act 3, how come a great strategist like her let the sus sponsorship slip just bcs they are desperate, not to mention her screen time is really small and her role seem so unsignificant and it feels lile she is a plain npc.
4. The awesome world quest that we have done doesnt get any mention at all! Inazuma owe us so much with cleansing sakura, thunder sakura, tatarigami, obarashi quest. It has so much potential that yae or ei or anyone else aknowledge what traveler has been done but nooo.
cracks knuckles... i suppose it's time for my promised dissertation. interestingly enough, you touched on a lot of the main issues i had with chapter III.
i think that if i had to pin the main issue, it's a lack of overall cohesiveness? we were jumping all over the place without the chance to ever flesh things out. inazuma is a smaller cast, but i feel like we didn't get to see any of them shine. since i'm most interested in the genshin characters, i'll break down my problems by going over everyone and their (lack) of impact on the story.
was ayaka not questioned or placed under suspicion for being close to thoma before his escape? i wanted to see her broken up over her duties as they relate to the yashiro commission, paired with having someone she genuinely cares about in danger. it would've been an interesting struggle if she was forced to choose one or the other. instead she just kinda took a back seat.
speaking of thoma, i don't even have anything to say, because he just... was there? for .0001 seconds. said "lol this sucks ig" and that's about it. i know we're going to get a story for him in the future since he's a 5* but i'm not getting my hopes up 😭 then in the raiden shogun's character story, man is peachy keen! be upset with the raiden shogun! have some inner conflict! even if it's just using loaded language because he's under surveillance for going against the raiden shogun, that'd be so cool. saying something like,
"Traveler, what's with that expression? Oh please, there's nothing to worry about. We're under the Statue of the Omnipresent God's protection. Nothing bad has ever happened here." *wink*
i also don't know what to say about gorou. he was... there....... i think. what is he fighting for? what are the stakes for him? what makes him place so much trust into kokomi? i'm out of things to say about him because i don't remember anything he did or said.
kokomi... oh kokomi... i was so hyped. so excited. i thought that maybe we could see a foil to the raiden shogun. that she'd have a moment where she's forced to realize, just like her opponent, sacrifices must be made that will hurt people who will never understand why she made them. or maybe something to show her military prowess. but instead she just accepts a mysterious patron's help (?), sees her people aging like the grateful dead from JJBA, and goes oh well. that sucks. what can ya do. oh bye traveler i guess, good luck with that. ????????????? HUH... similar case to thoma where she's gonna get a character story but like. she won't be the leader of the resistance anymore. that was her whole shtick. they took her shtick away. also she forced me to interact with more NPCs whose names i've already forgotten so i'm tilted about that still.
KUJOU SARA... AN INJUSTICE. A DISGRACE. a slap to my woman loving face. the build up was there. yae miko's comments about sara probably knowing the tenryou commission is involved in shady dealings, but is choosing not to think about it. sara being forced to confront reality and challenge her adopted father with the truth. being able to blaze a new path for herself in the process. when she started running to the raiden shogun i was ultra hyped up. sara, a devotee to the shogun for so long, was about to see her god interacting with the same people who led inazuma to this awful state. how would she react? would she stay ignorant, like yae miko so coyly said, choosing to look away in favor of following her god's footsteps? or would she be forced to recognize the raiden shogun isn't as divine as she once thought, and challenge her belief system?
we open the door to see the raiden shogun. the loading screen ensues. the camera pans to the ominous room, clouded in darkness, hinting at the ominous confrontation that is to come. the music takes a serious timbre. and then...
well fuck that potential character arc i guess. (we still don't know what sara made of any of this since she poofed out of existence from the story at this point)
kazuha also was handed a similar treatment. we've been with him for a while longer now. he is our introduction into inazuma, the one who first gets us emotionally involved by regaling us with the bittersweet tale of friendship that led him to becoming a wanted criminal. a kind soul who loves nature yet was dealt a cruel hand by fate, forced to watch his home nation turn into a hostile place, where his dear friend ultimately perished as a result. we get the scene with his friend's vision lighting back up. he parries a block from the raiden shogun, in the same area where his friend was killed by her. the parallels. the drama. except this time, he wasn't too late. he protected the traveler where he "failed" to protect his friend in the past. did he feel redemption at this? or was it a bittersweet reminder of what could've been?
WELL i guess we'll never know because we didn't get to talk to him again 😭 idk who got a bait and switch worse, him or sara. jesus christ mihoyo.
then we have signora. why is the raiden shogun talking to her? does she know about the gnosis being taken, and if she doesn't, what was her plan to get it from the archon? what does she think about scaramouche? and oh, okay, we're fighting here now. good fight + god tier music. pog pog. okay, now we've beaten her up, and raiden shogun wyd— wait no not signora her lore is still on CUPS not YET raiden shogun and— ah she's dead. okay. non nerds who didn't read artifact lore are going to know nothing about her. signora has such an interesting story, and yet... well. ok.
then we get raiden shogun redemption (?) arc. i was hype for this as well, though at that point, idk why i bothered being hype. i knew they were gonna do a cute power of friendship something or another, and i'm good with that, so long as it's executed well. what i was envisioning was like seven different buffs to correspond with the seven different visions, the dreams of those whose ambitions were stolen serving as the spear to penetrate the raiden shogun's heart of stone. maybe a hydro vision giving us extra healing for a time, with the voice acting over it being like,
"Even if the rest of the world forgets us, let our will carry you through this one final time. Succeed where we couldn't, Traveler."
so on and so forth.
but instead we got— you get the idea at this point. why bother spelling it out anymore.
at that point i was surprised the raiden shogun didn't go "oopsie woopsie!! we made a fucky wucky!!!" because that was the vibe i was getting. i love ei, don't get me wrong, but i wanted to see her challenged with what she had done to inazuma in the past year. maybe meeting NPC #2345259 who lost her sister to the vision decree or something, reminding ei of the love she held for her sister... being forced to come to terms with the extent of what she's done in pursuit of eternity.
anyway. please for the love of god mihoyo hire better writers for the main story. that is all i ask. thank you.
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aphrodite in war | 02
pairing: jeon jungkook x reader
genre: comedy, fluff, angst, eventual smut / greek life, fake dating, roommates, lovers to enemies and back to lovers au
word count: 14,243
description: Everyone knew about the war that had been brewing on the edge of campus for the past two years. Sorority versus Fraternity; a showdown for the ages. However, when the escalating antics between them yields the consequence of possible suspensions for both chapters, the presidents of each house must come together to try and figure out how to end this battle... Which is kind of hard, considering they were the ones responsible for it in the first place.
note: here is an audio post of a beautiful song with lyrics inspired by AiW, which was written by one of my lovely readers!
→ part 01
Red, hot anger had curled its way around your bones, forcibly moving your limbs until you somehow found yourself standing in front of the Lambda house with a single pair of heart-covered boxers in hand; murderous intent leaving Jungkook’s voice indiscernible in the distance as you’d left him standing in front of the defiled Tri Delt house. Maybe he was telling you to wait for him while he began to pull down the rest of the countless pairs of boxers that were plastered along the outside of the sorority. Or maybe he was telling you to not go inside because it would only make it worse to have the furious president of Tri Delt waking up dozens of Lambdas at seven in the morning. You genuinely couldn’t tell what he was shouting as you ripped the front door of the fraternity open and stomped inside.
It had been over two years since you had stepped foot inside of your neighbor’s house, but it was exactly as you remembered. Red solo cups and crushed cans of beer scattered around the floor as a telling sign that it was indeed the morning after a night of partying, two Lambdas passed out on the couch because apparently the staircase that led to their rooms had been an impenetrable obstacle in their drunken states, and the scent of weed encasing the entire house that seemingly never went away. It was all the same, and you hoped as you went down the hallway to the left, that held a portion of the bedrooms in this house, that a particular person’s room was also the same as it had been before. You banged your fist against the door, scowling as you waited for the person on the other side to answer.
“What the fuck?” You heard someone say. The voice was scratchy from just being woken up but still recognizable as the person you were looking for; Jimin.
You banged on the door again, your patience level laying at zero.
You heard the bed creak and then footsteps began padding across the floor. “Uh, is this the cops?” He asked, probably to know whether he should hide a few things before opening the door.
You rolled your eyes. “No, I’m not here to confiscate your coke. Now. Open. The. Door.” You spat each word out through gritted teeth.
“Y/N?” Jimin asked before ripping his door open, revealing a mop of messy bed head framing his bewildered expression. He stood there shirtless, adorning only a white pair of tight Calvin Klein boxers that were doing absolutely nothing to hide his morning wood.
“Oh, god.” You threw your hand up to try and block out its unavoidable presence.
Jimin glanced down at himself before raising his head, smirking as he leaned against his doorframe, not even attempting to hide the piece of him that you were trying to avoid looking at. “You’re not exactly decent yourself there, Nips.” He pointed toward your chest.
Your eyes widened. In your rage you had completely forgotten about the attire you had decided was appropriate to storm the Lambda house in. You immediately crossed your arms over your chest to hide the fact that you were wearing the flimsiest tanktop of all time in combination with no bra.
“Plus, I’m in my own house,” He started again. “What’s your excuse?”
“Trust me. I would’ve loved nothing more than to never had to of stepped foot in this place ever again. But,” You paused, holding up the pair of heart covered boxers you had ripped off the Tri Delt house because you thought they were the most recognizable among the sea of plain solid blacks, whites, and maroons. “I have a motherfucking bone to pick with someone in this house.”
Jimin studied the piece of fabric that you held up before him before his mouth dropped open. “Fuck, did you sleep with Taehyung? I’m gonna knock his ass out if Jungkook doesn’t get to him first.”
Your face wrinkled in disgust. “Ew, no. There are about a million pairs of boxers all over the Tri Delt house and I’m trying to find out who did it, so thank you for letting me know. Now where is Tae’s room?”
“Oh, thank god.” Jimin’s expression softened, as if he was relieved that his friend didn’t sleep with you; who they thought of as the devil incarnate. “But no, I’m not telling you. I had nothing to do with that. I went home early last night. But Jungkook can deal with it, just like you can deal with what your girls did.”
“What’re you talking about?” You asked, eyes narrowing.
“Oh, you don’t know?” Jimin smiled. “Some of the guys texted me before I fell asleep last night saying that when they left Pub they found their cars with words written all over their windows in lipstick.”
Your eyes screwed shut, tongue jabbing at the side of your cheek as you tried to calm the colossal wave of anger that flooded through you for a second time in the fifteen minutes you had been awake.
What a fantastic day this was turning out to be.
“Are you serious?” You finally asked, voice a little bit louder than you’d intended.
“Yeah, so you might wanna check your own people before you come into someone else’s house and accuse them of things.” He shrugged. “Might save you some embarrassment next time.”
Heat rushed to your face. You were pissed, but that was only because you agreed with him. “Look—” You started, not really sure what was going to come out of your mouth, but it was the squeak of sneakers running along the wooden floor boards that stopped you.
Jungkook was suddenly rounding the corner, a mountain of boxers filling his arm. “Y/N, what the hell?” He hissed before dropping them to the ground.
“What? I was just trying to get to the bottom of this.” You held the heart boxers up one last time before tossing them into the pile next to Jungkook’s feet.
“Yeah, and how’d that go for you?” He pointed towards Jimin.
“Well, I found out who those boxers belonged to… But…” You trailed off, not wanting to admit what you just found out.
“But?” Jungkook asked.
“But, she found out that it was only payback for some of her members participating in a little bit of lipstick graffiti on Taehyung and a few other people’s cars.” Jimin smirked next to you as he revealed what you were too embarrassed to say.
There was a small pause, and then Jungkook was laughing, like he couldn’t believe that this was actually happening. That even after the threat of suspension to these people, they just didn’t care. And you just wanted to understand why. Was it truly because they didn’t care or was it due to the fact that the failed relationship that had acted as the catalyst to this war still held hostility and therefore still felt unresolved. Either way it was an issue that you and Jungkook needed to figure out how to fix. You were already trying to think of other possible solutions to this mess when another door a few feet away opened, and the sleep-deprived face of Taehyung poked its way out.
“The hell’s going on out here?” He slurred before his eyes locked with yours. “Whoa, seriously what the hell is going on out here?”
A few more doors throughout the hall began to open. Clearly this little altercation had been a little bit louder than you’d anticipated. All of the Lambdas faces twisted in confusion as they found you standing in their hallway for the first time in years.
“We found your little boxer exhibit,” You finally answered.
Taehyung threw his hands up. “Hey, I only did it because of the—”
“—Lipstick,” You finished for him. “Yeah, yeah, I got that part already.”
“Some of us had been drinking and it pissed us off.” Baekhyun shrugged, as he had been one of the guys to join in on this little morning confrontation. “Sorry.”
“I can’t deal with this. I have a million other things to worry about today.” You rubbed your palms over your eyes in frustration as you remembered the other issue you had to handle once the financial aid office opened for their half day, since today was Saturday. The mystery of your less than lucrative bank account and the implications that it had on your living situation hanging over your head.
“Well, as a sign of my immense regret and an attempt to repair this terrible relationship between our houses, I do have to say you look great this morning.” Baekhyun motioned towards your minimally covered body. “If you ever wanna hang out—”
You rolled your eyes, deciding to not listen to the rest of the garbage he decided to spew, but it turned out you didn’t even need to tune him out because suddenly a voice sliced through the air like a razor.
“Watch it, Baek.” Jungkook sounded cold, mouth set in a firm line as he stared daggers down the hallway.
“Uhm, I’m…” Baekhyun started, an awkward air encasing everyone. “I just woke up. I’m mildly delusional. My bad, Kook.” He tapped at his head and raised his hands as an apology before shutting the door.
There was silence, a palpable silence that had Jimin, Taehyung and a few of the other Lambdas that had opened their doors grabbing the back of their necks as they stared at the floor. But Jungkook kept his stance, arms crossed over his chest as he continued to stare at Baekhyun’s door.
After only a few moments of this you just couldn’t take it. You clapped your hands together, trying to let the sudden burst of sound break the tension. “Come on,” You said, pulling at Jungkook’s shirt. “Let’s talk outside.”
He nodded, finally breaking his glare down the hallway before turning towards Jimin. “Do you think you could give me a ride back to my place in a minute. I don’t have my car.”
“I can, but why’d you Uber back here last night instead of your place?” Jimin asked, clearly not privy to the events that had transpired between you and Jungkook last night.
Jungkook’s eyes found yours for a split second before returning to Jimin. “I met a girl from Chi Omega. I was gonna meet her at her place, but it fell through.” He shrugged, a lie so on the fly that it made you wonder how many times he’d done that to you since knowing him.
“Gotcha.” Jimin nodded, seeming to perfectly understand. “Just let me know when you wanna go.”
“Thanks,” Jungkook said as he joined you in stepping over the pile of boxers still strewn across the floor. “And make sure everyone picks this shit up.”
“Will do, boss.” Jimin saluted before shutting his door behind him.
After that you made a straight line through the house, not wanting to stand inside this place that held too many memories. You breathed a sigh of relief when you pushed the front door open, letting the fresh air wash over you — albeit the hot, muggy fresh air that reminded you of the fact that it was the end of summer and rain every single day was a constant.
“I got all the boxers,” Jungkook finally said.
“That’s great, but it still doesn’t change the fact that my members fucked up first. Plus, I have this financial aid bullshit to deal with.” You pinched the bridge of your nose, trying to flush the stress from your body. “What the hell are we gonna do?”
Jungkook shook his head and sighed, because like you he apparently also didn’t have any solid answers, but before he could try to offer anything his phone began to ring. He pulled it from his pocket and eyed the contact on the screen.
“Give me a second. It’s my new roommate that’s supposed to be moving in this week,” He said before answering.
“What’s up?” He began.
You stood there for a minute, watching the way Jungkook’s face began to slowly devolve as the person on the other side of the line spoke, and from the expression on his face, it did not seem like it was good news.
“Are you serious?” Jungkook finally said, grabbing at his hair. “Like I’m happy for you guys, but rent is due next week and you were supposed to be moving in and paying half.”
It seemed you weren’t the only person having issues involving living situations.
“I doubt I’ll be able to find anyone this short notice. And if I can’t there’s no way I can pay rent in full this month and have enough to last me the rest of the semester.”
After that the conversation on Jungkook’s end was mostly just grunts and short responses as he was clearly frustrated and already had his mind focused on possible solutions.
“Alright, alright, bye.” He hung up the phone, pressing his hands against temples.
“Well that didn’t sound good,” You said.
“Yeah, my new roommate apparently worked things out with his ex-girlfriend, so instead of moving in with me, he’s moving back in with her. So now, I have no one to split rent with and am basically fucked.”
That was actually very unfortunate, but even though you and Jungkook had experienced a somewhat understanding moment last night, it still wasn’t enough to completely erase the hostile relationship the two of you had engaged in for the last few years. So the comment that you replied with was already halfway out of your mouth before you could even think to stop it. “I’m sure it wouldn’t be too difficult to convince some of your harem of girls to play roomie and split rent with you.”
Jungkook turned to look at you, eyes narrowing into slits. “Yeah, I might do that actually.” He sounded pissed, clearly not finding any amusement in the comment that you admittedly shouldn’t have made. “And when you get kicked out of the Tri Delt house you should ask that guy from the soccer team if you can move in with him. What was his name? Hoseok?”
You deserved the response, but it still didn’t make your blood boil any less. “Whatever, we can deal with our fucked up living situations later on. For now just try and think of a way to get our idiot friends to stay in line. We’ll see who has the best idea at Kappa Sig tonight. Did Yoongi tell you about the party? Are you going?”
Yoongi was a mutual friend of yours and Jungkook’s from high school. He was also in a fraternity, but instead of Lambda Phi Epsilon it was Kappa Sigma, which was located a little further down Greek Drive. When the relationship between you and Jungkook ended he somehow managed to stay impartial and remained friends with the both of you, thankfully.
“Yeah, I’m going,” He said simply, clearly still embittered from your joke.
“Good, better start thinking then,” You said and then turned to head back towards the Tri Delt house; any progress you and Jungkook made last night seeming to snap in half as you left him behind.
Yet, somehow you could feel him staring into your back, the lingering feeling not disappearing until you closed the front door to your house behind you.
—————-
You had spent the past half an hour nervously fidgeting in your bed as you waited for the financial aid office to open. As soon as the time on your phone read eight a.m. you immediately dialed their number. However, it was the first week of classes, and that meant that everyone and their mother needed to talk to financial aid, because unfortunately situations like yours were completely common. So even though you called the second they opened it was still a twenty minute wait before you finally heard a voice that wasn’t pre-recorded and asking you to press various numbers depending on your issue or question.
“Hello. This is financial aid. How can I help you?” The woman on the other side of the line chimed.
“Hi, I have a question about my refund.” Your voice was high-pitched as it shifted into a mode that was more professional. “I received my refund on Thursday, and it was the correct amount. However, when I checked my bank account yesterday my refund had been completely taken out. I was just trying to figure out why that is.”
She hummed in understanding. “Could you give me your student I.D number and we’ll see what’s going on.”
You rattled off your number and there was a few seconds of silence as the woman on the other side pulled up your information.
“Okay, it says here…” She paused, presumably reading through whatever she was seeing once more. “That you will be getting your refund deposited back into your bank account, however, it had to be taken back out to adjust the amount. One of your scholarships informed the university that you and a few other recipients did not meet the new community service hours minimum they implemented to receive the scholarship this semester.”
You felt the blood drain from your face, anxiety making your hands go shaky. “New community service hour minimum?” You asked, trying to understand what that was even referring to, because you knew nothing about the change in hours you were supposed to obtain.
“Yes, they upped the amount. A few other students have already called to complain about this situation, but the office for that particular scholarship said that they sent an email out last year to inform you guys about the new amount that would be needed.”
Email? You didn’t think that you ever received an email with any information about that. “Oh… okay… Uhm, I guess I’ll try and figure out what’s going on. Thank you.”
You hung up the phone and immediately opened up your email app and began to scour through any undeleted messages from last year that you might have overlooked. And after a few minutes of scrolling, there it was, sitting in the depths of your inbox like some monster that was going to destroy you. You clicked on it as some sort of masochistic gesture. You already knew what it was going to say, so you didn’t know why you were even bothering to read it. And yes, there it was, written in bold print at the bottom of the email. A message that relayed the raise in community service hours needed.
“Fuck my life!” You yelled, throwing a pillow over your face and screaming into it.
Living in a sorority or fraternity was different than living in a regular apartment or house that wasn’t associated with the university. Instead of paying a monthly amount like a normal living situation, in order to live on campus you had to pay the full amount for the semester up front. Which basically translated to needing to fork over a couple thousand dollars all at once. Which, unless you were rich or incredibly well disciplined at saving money, scholarships and loans were the only option. That had been one of the reasons Jungkook decided to live at an apartment this year instead of at Lambda Phi Epsilon.
“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” You continued to yell into your pillow until your bedroom door was suddenly swinging open; a concerned Sana standing before you.
“I’m sorry,” She said, walking to the side of your bed. “You totally could’ve been having sex in here, but the expletives sounded more like frustration than fun, so I wanted to make sure.”
“It’s beyond frustration. It’s devastation.” You threw your pillow across the room to make your point.
“What happened?” She asked as she sat next to you on your bed.
You took a heavy sigh and explained the entire financial aid situation to her, and ended with the consequence of your entire scholarship debacle. “So I’m not going to be able to stay here this semester. I’m gonna have to find a new place to live.”
Sana’s mouth dropped, hand twisting into her hair. “Seriously? You’ve gotta move out?”
You, Sana, and Jennie were best friends that had lived less than ten feet away from each other for the past three year, and you had all hoped for your final year to be the same. But hope was like that. It gave you so much to look forward to, only for it to end in a way that you didn’t at all expect. You had experienced that many times, unfortunately.
“Yeah, looks like it,” You whispered, arm coming up to cover your eyes.
“No, it’ll be okay.” She squeezed at your arm. “I’ll text around today and see if anyone knows about people needing roommates.”
“Thanks,” You said, offering a weak smile.
“It’s not even something to stress over honestly. It’s gonna work itself out.” You could tell Sana was trying to be upbeat for your sake.
You nodded, but there were other issues besides where you were going to live. “But something that is apparently not going to work itself out is the failed peace treaty between us and next door.”
Sana cocked her head to the side. “Wait… Did something happen? What did they do?” She sneered, having the same reaction as you from earlier this morning.
“Plastered boxers all over our house.” Sana was about to go on a rant, but you informed her of the whole story before she could. “Because some of the girls wrote shit in lipstick on their cars at Pub last night.”
“You’re kidding me?” She slammed her palm down on the bed. “Who was it? I’m gonna kick their asses.”
The image that brought to your head actually made you laugh, which you were thankful for. You needed some sort of humor in your life on this miserable day. “I have no idea. I got a call from Jungkook this morning about the boxers and ran outside. I haven’t even had the chance to try and figure out who did it.”
“Wait… You were already here?” She asked. “You weren’t at Hoseok’s.”
Oh yeah, you forgot Sana had left Pub last night expecting to not see you until some time later today when Hoseok brought you home. She still had no idea about Jungkook and that entire emotional disaster from last night.
“Yeah, about that…” You definitely weren’t going to hide what happened, but you decided that you were going to sugarcoat it a bit. You didn’t like talking about your insecurities, even with your friends, so you decided painting it in a more positive light was for the best, because relatively speaking that actually had been a less hostile conversation compared to others that you and Jungkook had experienced over the years. “Because my bank account got emptied out from the whole financial aid thing, I just felt like going home instead of over to Hoseok’s, but I also didn’t have any money to Uber, so… Jungkook walked me home.”
Sana’s eyes widened, hands cupping either side of her face. “What?!”
“Yeah, he offered to walk me home.” You shrugged, trying to make it seem as though it wasn’t a big deal, but you knew that was going to do nothing to stop the onslaught of questions about to be thrown at you.
“Wait, wait, wait, so did you guys talk? Did you argue the whole time? Was it just awkward and silent? Like tell me.” She moved closer to you on the bed, curiosity beaming off of her.
“It wasn’t, uhm, bad actually.” You sat up, avoiding as much eye contact as you could manage without looking like a complete liar. “We talked and cleared the air on things. It was… enlightening.” That wasn’t a total fib. Certain feelings had been revealed, and yes, that might have ended up with you crying, but in the grand scheme of things that was a totally miniscule detail, right?
Sana’s expression twisted into that of bewilderment. “...Enlightening? What does that even mean? What became enlightened?”
You shrugged, buying yourself time to try and think of some way to fumble through any sort of half decent explanation. “Just our feelings on everything that happened and how we felt. Nothing crazy.”
She squinted her eyes, finger tapping at her nose. “I feel like there’s something you’re not telling me.”
“There isn’t. We just understand each other a lot better now.” You knew the longer she pushed the higher the possibility of you cracking, so you decided to bring up the one thing that you knew would flood her mind with thoughts completely unrelated to you and Jungkook. “You’ll see at Kappa Sig tonight. We’re better with each other now.”
Pink flushed to Sana’s cheeks at the mere mention of Kappa Sig, because in her mind Kappa Sig directly correlated to one of its members; Kim Seokjin, or one of Yoongi’s good friends.
“I almost forgot about the party tonight,” Sana started. Mission success it seemed as she completely dropped the conversation from before. “Maybe love is in the air, and Jennie’s luck with Namjoon will rub off on me tonight with Jin.”
“Maybe it is.” You smiled.
Sana gave you a strange look at your response, and you weren’t sure why, but you didn’t get the chance to find out before she dropped the expression and moved on to something else.
“I’m gonna text Jennie and see when she thinks she’ll come home.” She began typing on her phone before looking back up at you. “You wanna go get lunch or something in a few hours? Get your mind off of the whole financial aid thing while we wait for the party tonight? My treat since you don’t have your refund back yet.”
“That actually sounds great.” Sana leaned in, hugging you before jumping from your bed and heading back to her room directly next to yours.
You fell back flat against your bed, eyes wandering around your room. The pictures plastered across your walls of all of your friends and family. Posters of your favorite shows and movies. You couldn’t help but think about how in a week or so this wasn’t going to be yours anymore.
Where you were going to wind up at in the end, well, that was a complete mystery.
———
JUNGKOOK’S POV
Jungkook climbed into Jimin’s truck, slamming the door behind him. He pressed his forehead against the dashboard, palms pressing at his temples to try and relieve even the tiniest amount of stress that was currently running amok through his head.
Jimin jumped into the driver’s seat a minute later, whistling at the sight of his friend in such a rough position. “You good, man?” He asked.
“Do I look good?” Jungkook asked, sitting up against the seat. “I’ve gotta find a new roommate in the next week, act like a goddamn babysitter between forty-two grown adults, and worry about Y/N storming around the Lambda house now apparently.” He paused, clenching his hands into fists. “So, no, I’m not good.”
“Kook, just take it easy.” Jimin reached over, squeezing at his friend’s shoulder. “There’s gonna be a ton of people at that party tonight, and I guarantee you at least one person there needs a place to stay or at the very least knows someone who does.”
Jungkook nodded because he agreed that there were always people looking for places to stay. “What about the other two things?”
“Oh, you’re fucked on those. I don’t know what to tell you.” Jimin laughed as he hit the gear into reverse.
“You sound surprisingly calm about that, considering the chapter will be suspended if me and Y/N don’t figure out a way to make things okay between everyone.”
Jimin shrugged as he pulled out of the driveway. “If I had come out last night and seen my truck covered in lipstick, would I have been pissed? Sure. But, I would’ve just told you so that you could tell Y/N, and she could deal with it. The fact is, that’s how I am, but everyone’s different and you two can’t control that many people without some sort of miracle.”
Jungkook sighed, banging his head back against the headrest. “A miracle, huh?”
“Yeah, a straight up miracle,” He repeated as he drove past the Tri Delt house that was no longer covered in boxers.
Jungkook’s eyes drifted to the far right window on the second story, a small twinge budding inside of his chest. Words from that night almost two years ago pushed their way to the surface as they never failed to do.
“It’s nothing that you did… I’ve just been having these… thoughts.”
“Thoughts? What, thoughts of cheating on me? Of being with other people?”
“No! I mean, it’s not how you’re thinking. It’s just… You’re the only person I’ve ever dated, Y/N, and I don’t know if…”
“Oh, I’ll finish it for you, Jungkook. You don’t know if there’s someone better. Just fucking say it instead of going around it like you have been for months now.”
“I don’t think there’s someone better. I’m not ending this because I met someone else. I’m ending this because I can’t look at you and say I love you everyday when I’m having these thoughts, because it just doesn’t seem right. And I’m not saying that I don’t love you. I still do, but that doesn’t stop me from having these feelings of doubt about whether this is the last relationship I ever wanna have, when it’s the only one I’ve ever been in. I can’t just sit there and look at you when I know I’m thinking these things. I can’t do that because I care about you so fucking much, even if you’re looking at me right now like you hate me. I don’t want you to hate me.”
Jungkook wished he could permanently scrub that night from his head. There was so much crying, so much blame, so much anguish, from having to end things with someone that he truly did love. He hadn’t stopped loving you. That wasn’t why he broke up with you. He ended things because he wanted to be sure that the one experience that he’d ever had was the right one. And he knew when he took that risk that he could be throwing away something that was perfect. But he couldn’t be sure until he knew.
He had dated a few people in the two years since that night, and he had found some great relationships with some great girls — but nothing that had lasted. None of them ever felt as if he could see himself with them for years and years to come, and wasn’t that the whole point of dating? And of course, he couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like if he had never ended things with you. He thought about it every time he saw you actually. You wouldn’t know that, and no one around him would know that, because there was always something hostile coming out of someone’s mouth. Jungkook had hurt you, and he understood that, but it still didn’t excuse some of the things that you had accused him of over the years, and after a month or so he had gotten tired of playing polite and matched your antagonism; insult for insult, sneer for sneer.
He wasn’t sure if they could ever fully reconcile. The words had been said and there was no taking them back. He thought last night was actually a step in the right direction, with you revealing why you acted the way that you did. But still, he wasn’t sure if things could ever be civil between the two of you. The embitterment ran so deep on both sides that it seemed almost impossible to even try.
Jungkook remained lost in these thoughts when through his haze he heard Jimin speak a name that had him fearing for half a second that his friend could read his thoughts.
“Y/N?” Jungkook asked.
“Yeah, what actually happened last night?” Jimin glanced over, one brow arched.
“Uhm, what do you mean?”
“When I asked about why you were at the house and not at your apartment, you looked at Y/N.” Jimin slapped one hand to his chest. “Don’t think I didn’t notice.”
Well, he had only looked at her for all of half a second, so yeah, he had kind of hoped that no one would notice. But unfortunately, someone did, and that happened to be his nosy ass best friend.
“Y/N got stuck at Pub last night with no ride because financial aid fucked up her refund, and she couldn’t get a ride, so I walked her home. That’s it.” Which was true. He had done exactly that, but simply failed to mention the crying and sentimental admissions.
“So why didn’t you just say that when I asked?”
Jungkook ran a hand through his hair. He really didn’t want to reveal any of the details from what you’d told him last night, but he knew Jimin wasn’t going to stop asking until he at least told him something of substance. “Because there were other people in the hall listening, and I didn’t want them getting the same ideas as you right now.”
Jimin smirked. “Oh yeah, and what am I thinking?”
Jungkook shook his head, turning to look out of the window. “I’m not even gonna say it.”
“Any talk of feelings or gushy bullshit?” Jimin chuckled, clearly joking, but Jungkook hesitated before answering, and that was all his friend needed to assume whatever theory was being crafted inside of his head. “Oh, Jesus, did you guys actually talk about your feelings? Oh my god, did you guys kiss? Fuck?” Jimin was looking at Jungkook frantically now, like he needed the answers to the questions being proposed in his favorite TV show.
“You’re truly the biggest gossip I’ve ever met.” He leaned back in his seat, arms crossed over his chest as Jimin pulled into his apartment complex. “It’s sad.”
“Your lack of answers is making me lean towards you guys fucking. And if that happened,” He let go of the steering wheel for a second to motion at his head as if it was exploding. “I’m gonna lose my goddamn mind. Like I get it, sex is sex, but after everything she’s said about you since you guys broke up, I just…” He trailed off, shaking his head in disappointment like he had already decided that the two of you had definitely hooked up.
“She said that shit in the beginning because I made her feel terrible about herself, so she wanted to make me feel terrible too. I’m not saying that it’s right, but at this point we’ve both said shit we regret and didn’t mean.” He tried to make it seem more casual by shrugging. “And we didn’t sleep together. Chill out.”
Jimin’s expression was skeptical as he pulled into the parking space in front of Jungkook’s building and unlocked the doors. “Still, something definitely happened, because otherwise you would be talking about how she was acting like a bitch, but you’re not, which means that you weren’t acting like an asshole, which in turn means that something went down, because the last time the two of you were anything less than pissy to each other was when you were still dating.”
Jungkook simply placed a hand on Jimin’s shoulder, forcing a smile. “Your conspiracies are unmatched, my friend.” And then he was climbing out of the truck, shutting the door, and waving his friend goodbye without even looking back.
However, that didn’t stop Jimin from rolling down his window as he began to back out of the parking space, throwing his final sentiment to the wind. “You guys getting back together was the kind of miracle I was talking about.”
———-
It was currently ten p.m. and the scene on Greek Drive was about two dozen or so Tri Delts making their way towards the most well known party frat on campus; Kappa Sigma.
Kappa Sig was the blueprint for the types of fraternities that you see in various movies or TV shows. There was never a time when your shoes weren’t sticking to the wooden floors due to the constant barrage of alcohol being spilled by various drunken patrons. Each member had an actual mini bar set up in the corner of their room, which in the next few weeks, once football and tailgating started up, would be the most popular place to score some free drinks — if you were a girl that is. Kappa Sig was also fairly stereotypically frat in who it allowed entrance into its castle of alcohol and sex. Basically, if you were a girl, you were good. If you were a guy, well it was complicated. Usually it was a no go, or you were asked to pay such a ridiculously high cover at the door that no one in their right mind would pay it, or the easiest way: have a friend who had sway within the house.
So fortunately for you, Sana, Jennie, and the rest of the Tri Delts, it was a non-issue. However, unfortunately, Yoongi, a good friend of yours and Jungkook’s, happened to be the president of Kappa Sig, and therefore Lambdas were allowed free reign. No cover charge and no being turned away, which meant tonight was bound to be interesting.
“Jennie, hold my hand until we get there.” Sana didn’t even wait for a response and instead opted to simply interlock their fingers. “I need good luck in the crushes-actually-approaching-and-showing-interest department.”
Jennie laughed, swinging their arms back and forth between them. “Well if you can get even half my luck, it should be a good night for you.”
“Oh, wow. Way to brag, bitch,” Sana said, throwing a hand over her heart. “We’ve got Mrs. Already Dick Whipped over here.”
“I am not!” Jennie yelled. “He just…”
“Lasted longer than sixty seconds?” You finished for her with a purse of your lips.
She pointed at you. “That he fucking did. That and so, so much more.”
Sana groaned next to the two of you. “Ugh, I want that. I haven’t had good sex in months.”
“Well, even if things don’t happen with Jin tonight, there’s gonna be plenty of guys here,” You tried to remind her.
“Uh yeah, lots of Lambda guys,” She reminded you right back.
You shrugged. You didn’t like that it had become this sort of unwritten rule that Tri Delts and Lambdas couldn’t get together, but when everyone was pranking or fucking with each other’s stuff, it was kind of difficult to look past that just for the sake of a hookup.
“Well, Kappa Sig boys for you tonight it is then.” You motioned towards the top of the driveway, the party seemingly already completely started.
The music was blaring and there was a fairly long line of people waiting to get in, but it only took a couple minutes for you to move through the line and pass over the threshold and into the scene of dimmed lights, packed bodies, and endless alcohol.
You knew you had a lot of things to worry about, but after the absolutely horrendous two days that you’d had to endure, between suspension threats, disastrous house meetings, crying in front of your ex, the boxer and lipstick fiasco, and financial aid meltdowns, you just wanted to be able to relax and have fun for a single night. You didn’t think that was too much to ask for, and the vodka bottle currently staring at you from the kitchen, seemed to be calling you and saying they were the perfect place to start in order to make that fun, relaxing night come true.
Once everyone got into the house, the girls broke up into their mini groups of close friends. You motioned to Sana and Jennie to follow you to the kitchen so you could get some drinks. It took some effort but the three of you eventually managed to make your way through the crowd that couldn’t bother to idle anywhere else besides around the counter of various alcohols and plastic cups. Each of you quickly made a sufficiently strong cup of vodka combined with whatever random mixers were available.
“Okay, now let’s find a comfy couch that isn’t covered in vomit stains to camp out on and get plastered.” You pointed towards the living room, where a majority of the party goers were.
“A couch without vomit stains?” Jennie clicked her tongue. “That’s a tall order for Kappa Sig.”
“Indeed.” Sana giggled, pointing towards some of the few empty places to sit in the back corner.
You made your way over there, exchanging hellos with a few people that you knew before plopping down on the couch, all three of you spilling a few splashes of your drinks on each other; not even a drop of alcohol in your systems yet.
“Well this is a great start.” You laughed, taking a large gulp from your cup that had you grimacing. “Jesus, this cheap ass Pinnacle. Come on, KS, get your shit together.”
“Well excuse the fuck out of me.” The voice came from someone you recognized immediately.
You turned around, a wide grin plastered across your face. “It’s okay Yoongi. I still love you even though you’re making us suffer with cheap booze.”
He sauntered over, sitting down on the armchair beside you. “Well, you’re lucky you’re one of my very good friends or I wouldn’t bless you with my own personal stash.” His smile was devilish as he pulled up a bottle of Tito's vodka.”
There was a collective gasp from you and friends. “Wow, keeping the good shit all to yourself.”
“Hey, didn’t I just say I was gonna help you out?” He twisted the cop off and motioned for the three of you to hold your cups out, and one by one he filled your cups up to the very top. “Be wise with this power, friends.”
“You know, Yoongi,” Sana said from across the couch. “I’d be totally willing to not take advantage of your hospitalities if you’d wanna help me out in another department.”
“Jesus, Sana!” You already knew where she was going with this. “You’re willing to drink rubbing alcohol instead of Tito’s just to get a good word in to Jin?”
Sana simply shrugged, zero shame in her methods.
Yoongi laughed. “Put a good word in? I’ll see what I can do.”
“Appreciate it.” She raised her cup to his and they cheered in the hopeful union of Sana of Jin.
Yoongi opened his mouth to speak, but something near the front of his house caught his eye. “Also, can we try to have no brawls in the house tonight?”
“Huh?” You were confused until you followed his line of sight, a mob of Lambda boys entering the house one by one; Jungkook leading them all.
“No fighting,” Yoongi reiterated. “Or no more Tito’s for you.”
You rolled your eyes, taking a sip from your drink that was currently ninety percent vodka. “You haven’t heard? We’re cordial now.”
“Cordial? A Greek Drive miracle, I guess.” He stood up from the armchair and motioned towards the guys. “I’m gonna go say hey to Kook.”
You nodded. “Okay, I’ll catch up with you later.”
Yoongi had managed to stay good friends with both you and Jungkook throughout this entire process. You hated the fact that the three of you never got to hang out together anymore because of the tension between you and Jungkook, but, hey, that was life.
“Don’t forget our deal, Yoongi!” Sana shouted as he started across the living room.
“I got you, girl. But just so you know our bedrooms are right next to each other so be mindful.” He lowered his hands to the ground, silently saying to keep the volume down.
“You’re the best!” She said, kissing her hand and throwing it out to the party host.
“Someone might be getting lucky after all.” You squeezed at her thigh before standing up. “So while you celebrate that, I’m gonna put more mixer in this drink so I don’t blackout by midnight.”
“You act like you don’t do that every other week.” Jennie laughed.
You squinted at her. “Rude.”
“Love you,” She said, making a heart shape with her hands as you made your way back towards the kitchen.
You gave small smiles as you passed more people that you knew that had just arrived at the party. You glanced towards the door, the Lambda boys still congregating there. You couldn’t help your eyes from catching on Jungkook. He was standing there, grinning at everyone who approached him. He was the type that could be friends with anyone. A bright light that everyone gravitated towards, that no one ever found boring. You bit the inside of your cheek at the gnawing though that never failed to enter your head anytime you saw him. And it was like he could sense that pull, because then he was looking at you, giving a small nod of acknowledgment.
A tiny, insignificant nod. At its very best, that was what your relationship was now, and that made you feel incredibly empty.
You screwed your eyes shut for a second, shaking your head, trying to force those things from your head as you finally made it to the kitchen and poured a little bit of the first soda you could reach into your cup; just a little bit.
And the party continued on like that for the next hour or two. Laughing and smiling with your friends and then hunting Yoongi down to steal some of his personal alcohol, all while catching random glances of Jungkook. It was fun and your buzz was well in effect by the time it was once again the moment to go find Yoongi.
You asked Sana, who was currently talking to Jin in the corner of the living room, if she had seen him. Apparently a very good word has been put in and two seemed to be hitting it off.
“He went out back.” She motioned towards the sliding glass door.
You offered a hum of thanks and left them to mingle alone as you made your way to the door and pulled it open. You searched the tiny groups of people that were standing around, not able to find Yoongi anywhere until you noticed two occupied chairs sitting in the distance. One was Yoongi and the other… Well, of course it just had to be Jungkook.
You took a deep breath, taking a sip of your drink before walking out to the secluded area beneath the giant tree where they were chatting. You did a little run in the last few feet of approaching them before kneeling down next to Yoongi’s lawn chair. his body slightly hiding Jungkook’s.
“Hello, my spirit bearing friend.”
“And if it isn’t the spirit stealer herself,” Yoongi said as he grabbed your cup and poured a shot or two inside. “I already had to get another handle of Tito’s from my room. You’re killing me tonight.”
“It was a bad day.” You poked your bottom lip out as an apology. “I’m sorry.”
“It couldn’t have been that bad.” He motioned towards your cup that he had filled up multiple times already tonight.
“Well, I fucked up something with one of my scholarships, so now I’ve gotta find a place to live by the end of next week because I can’t afford to stay in the Tri Delt house.” You shrugged, the alcohol making the daunting situation seem less serious than it actually was. “So yeah, bad day.”
“Are you serious?” Yoongi said at the same time that Jungkook leaned forward with this concerned look on his face before saying, “Wait, what?”
“No… It’s, uhm, fine.” You glanced at the ground and began awkwardly scratching at your temple. “I don’t wanna ruin the mood for tonight. I’m gonna start looking for roommates tomorrow, so if either of you guys know of anyone.” You pointed your cup towards both of them with a shrug, trying to make it seem casual.
Yoongi nodded, and then suddenly a smile was creeping across his face. You knew that expression well. It was the expression he’d made when you were all sixteen and drunk and decided that going to the rope swing down by the lake (the alligator infested lake) in the dead of night was a perfectly sane idea. Or when it was your senior year prom and he convinced you and Jungkook that an impromptu beach trip a few hours away would be fun, and it might actually have been if any of you had thought about money, hotel reservations, or just any sort of planning in general, but you didn’t, so it essentially became a three drive only to end up at a Denny’s in a beach town instead of your hometown. The point was, you had seen that expression many, many times, and it was one that he made when a bad, impulsive idea started creeping through that brain of his.
“Whatever it is, no,” You said as you pushed some of the leaves and sticks off of the grass so you could sit down.
“You don’t even know what I’m gonna say!” He exclaimed. “It’s a brilliant idea actually.”
“Yeah, we know that face anywhere.” Jungkook moved his chair forward slightly so that the three of you were now sitting in a triangle, facing one another. “Ideas that come from that face are never brilliant.”
Yoongi smacked his lips. “Well, that’s offensive.”
“What’s offensive is almost getting eaten by alligators because you convinced us by using bogus gator attack statistics,” You pointed out, and Jungkook chuckled at the memory.
“But, we didn’t get eaten, so it’s fine.” He shrugged.
“Whatever.” You rolled your eyes. “So what’s this plan cooking in your head right now?”
The devilish expression returned once more as he began looking back and forth between you and Jungkook. Oh, this was not good.
“Well, you said that you need a place to stay, right?”
“...Right,” You said hesitantly, not completely sure where this was going until he turned his sights towards Jungkook; the phone call you’d overheard from earlier in the day flashing through your mind.
“Yoongi, you idiot—” You started to say, but he was already spewing the other half of his grand plan.
“And Jungkook needs a roommate!” He shouted, clapping his hands together like he’d just invented the surefire way to cure a hangover. “It’s perfect!”
There was a pause between the group, complete silence save from the chatting going on closer to the house — and then there was uncontrollable laughter. You and Jungkook doubled over at the most ridiculous proposal that you’d ever heard in your entire lives.
Because it was totally ridiculous… Right?
“Why are you guys laughing?” Yoongi asked, looking genuinely confused. “That solves literally all of your problems.”
You caught the tear that was escaping out of the corner of your eye. “Yeah, it’s a great idea in theory Yoongi, if me and Jungkook didn’t have issues.”
“I mean you guys are sitting here right now with each other.” He motioned between the two of you. “And there’s no fighting going on like there usually is. Plus, you said your houses were cordial now. I thought that meant you guys too.”
You and Jungkook glanced at each other, the amused smiles from Yoongi’s scheme faltering slightly. It had been a long time since you guys had been like this with each other. There was the talk after Pub last night and now you were here, just sitting and laughing with a mutual old friend. It was nice, you had to admit. But living together? That was just totally absurd.
“Yoongi, that’s…” Jungkook trailed off, shaking his head, but not saying anything concrete. “And it doesn’t actually solve all of our problems… Our houses aren’t as cordial as we were hoping they’d be, even after we told them about President Kwon’s suspension threat.” You had texted Yoongi about the suspension fiasco yesterday and you were sure that Jungkook had done the same.
“Wow, your members really are fucking idiots.” Yoongi laughed, shaking his head in disbelief. “You guys have way more pull than you realize.”
Your brows furrowed. “What do you mean?”
Yoongi held one finger up as he sipped from his cup, like he was about to drop some serious knowledge on the two presidents who had no control over their houses. “College kids are like toddlers. They need guidance. Before you guys were sort of like their big brother and sister whose lead they followed because they liked you and thought you were cool — that’s how you guys became presidents after all. Which means now you’re essentially like their parents.”
You snorted at the idea, but it wasn’t the craziest analogy. You remembered when you were a freshman and first joined Tri Delt. The president back then felt like this motherly figure who you could go to for anything. It was hard for you to think that other people now saw you that way, but maybe they did and you hadn’t fully noticed yet.
“You’re laughing, but I’m serious,” Yoongi started again. “Okay, so you guys told them they needed to get their shit together, right?”
You and Jungkook both nodded.
“And like I said, you guys are like their parents — their divorced parents who they respect but feel the need to defend depending on whose side they're on.”
Again, you and Jungkook just looked at each other, a tiny piece of understanding falling into place. You and him had just been two people who didn’t work out. You thought it was a simple issue, but you just never realized what the consequences of that would be. People choosing sides. Defending each other’s actions. Getting even.
It was a mess. A mess that needed to be fixed somehow.
“Well that’s nice to know,” Jungkook said, breaking you from your thoughts. “But it doesn’t actually help us fix anything.”
That was true. Just because you knew why everyone had so easily fallen into this feud didn’t change the fact that something needed to change. Something had to be done… And as you glanced over at Yoongi, his expression that signaled bad ideas returned once more. It let you know that he had an idea or two about what could be done.
“Well, maybe you guys could reverse the divorce.” He shrugged.
It took you a second to grasp what he was trying to say, and then you were sputtering and ripping the bottle of vodka from your friend’s hand. “You’re cut off.”
Jungkook scoffed, an incredulous look adorning his features as well. “Seriously, what the fuck did you smoke, dude?”
“Nothing!” He grabbed the bottle back from your hand. “Strictly liquor tonight.”
“Like the roommate idea was one thing—” Jungkook started.
“Oh!” Yoongi cut him off. “So you didn’t think Y/N moving in was the worst idea ever.”
“I… I…” His mouth was closing and opening, like he truly didn’t know what to say. “Like as a last option it wouldn’t be the end of the world.”
“What?!” You said, a little louder than you’d intended, but you couldn’t help it. He was actually considering the idea of the two of you moving in together? “Us? Living in the same house?”
Jungkook shrugged. “I mean it’s better than you being homeless and me being broke.”
Your head was spinning, and you didn’t know if it was from the alcohol or that this insane idea was actually being proposed in a semi-serious manner.
“See, this is perfect!” Yoongi sat the glass bottle down on the grass and reached out to grab at yours and Jungkook’s arms, yanking you closer together. “Just pretend to get back together. If you just said it, no one would probably believe you, but if you guys actually move in together, no one would think that you’d go that far just to get everyone to stop fighting. The Great Greek Ruse! It would be the best story of all time!”
This was crazy. This was absolutely fucking crazy, and you knew Yoongi was half-joking with all of this, but you could tell that there was little bit of hope gleaming off of his eyes.
You grabbed Yoongi’s face on either side, forcing him to look at you. “You. Are. Fucking. Plastered.” You said each word slowly and deliberately to try and penetrate through the haze of drunkenness to get to the part of him that held actual common sense.
“Yes, I am in fact plastered.” He grabbed your wrists, his excitement only seeming to multiply. “But I would argue that the most logical solutions to problems come from being drunk. There’s no hesitation that an idea seems ridiculous, because everything seems less ridiculous when you're fucked up.”
You fisted your hands through your hair. “You’re crazy. Literally crazy. Jungkook, tell him he’s crazy.” You looked at him for confirmation, but he just sat there, pursing his lips like he was… thinking. Like he was actually considering it. “Are you serious?”
He threw his hands up in a defensive position. “No, it’s completely crazy. It’s just… Do you have any better ideas?”
“I can’t believe we’re even talking about this right now.” You scoffed, falling back flat against the grass and throwing your hands over your face. “Even if we did try to be that stupid and lie to everyone, they would never in a million fucking years believe that we would ever get back together. We fought in front of them literally yesterday!”
You peeked through your fingers and Jungkook held an expression that made it seem like he wasn’t so sure that was true. “I don’t know about that. All I did earlier was tell Jimin that we talked last night and two seconds later he had gone off on some tangent about how disappointed he was in me for sleeping with you again — and I corrected him that we didn’t, by the way.”
“Oh, fuck Jimin then,” You hissed, going off topic from this insane fake dating ruse.
“Come on, you know how it is. Sana and Jennie would act the same way. It’s like Yoongi said, the Lambdas defend me and the Tri Delts defend you. That’s literally how this entire mess started.”
You sighed, sitting back up and raking any stray pieces of grass out of your hair. You didn’t say anything, because you truly didn’t know what the correct response was. Sure, you knew that you needed to figure out a way to not get your chapters suspended… But this idea of pretending to get back together? You tried to imagine the reactions, but you just couldn’t, because again, this was fucking absurd. You were about to verbally reiterate this point once more when Jungkook continued.
“Look, all I’m saying is that when we broke up they saw how bad our relationship got and they decided to defend us. Maybe if we pretended to get back together, just for a little bit, they’d finally back off because the entire reason they started fighting in the first place wouldn’t even be an issue anymore.” Jungkook shrugged. He fucking shrugged.
“Do you even understand what pretending to get back together entails?” You began waving your hands around and pointing at your head, because maybe it would help get the point across somehow. “It means acting like we actually want to be together in public. It means no flirting or going home with people on campus or at parties because someone we know might see us. Would you actually be willing to go through that much effort?”
There was a pause and Jungkook just stared at you for a second, and then he started… smiling. This small, sad sort of smile. “What could it hurt to try?”
You scoffed, and scoffed, and scoffed, because you just couldn’t form words. You had explained it as best as you could, but neither he nor Yoongi seemed to get it. This meant… hugging, touching, kissing, just to prove to people that this was real. That you weren’t lying. That you wanted to be with him… And that he wanted to be with you.
You knew you hadn’t said anything in a minute or so, just lost in the details and implications of this scheme. You were only brought back to reality by Yoongi, speaking his piece once again. “Y/N,” He started, his voice quieter than it had been when he was excitedly explaining the idea before, “The worst thing that happens is they don’t believe you. But if you actually pull this off, you guys could save your chapters.”
Your mouth went firm and straight. The worst thing that could happen was the members not believing you? You had to stifle a laugh as you glanced towards Jungkook. No, that definitely wasn’t the worst thing that could happen. Not by a long shot. You knew why Jungkook didn’t see this as a terrible idea. He had nothing to lose, but you did.
However, in the end, you thought maybe the risk was worth it. Maybe this fucked up scheme could save you guys somehow.
“Uhm,” You finally started, clearing your throat to try and push your emotions back down into your chest. “So in the scenario that we actually tried this ridiculous plan… How would we go about telling everyone?”
You were staring at the ground, so you didn’t see what expression Jungkook’s face shifted into. You weren’t sure you wanted to know. Was it relief from having a shot at mending the relationship with your members? Or was it regret from you feeding into this idea that he hadn’t actually been taking seriously?
“Well,” Jungkook started, and you still refused to look at him. “First of all, did you say anything about our talk last night to anyone?”
“Not really. I told Sana that it was ‘enlightening,’ and basically said the same to Jennie. What about you?”
“I told Jimin that we talked about our feelings.”
You couldn’t help but laugh at that. “I’m sure he took that very well.”
“He was surprised…” Jungkook paused. “And I think that’s a good thing.”
You finally turned to look at him. “Why’s that a good thing?”
He stood up from his chair and held his hand out to you. You just stared at it for a second, confused at the kindness of the gesture before grabbing it and letting him help you up. He didn’t drop your hand even after you were standing up right, less than a foot of space separating you.
“Because I think if our best friends look genuinely shocked by what we’re about to do, then it might be a lot more believable.”
Your face twisted in confusion. “Uhm, what’re we about to do?”
Jungkook pursed his lips, hesitant as he opened his mouth to reveal what he was thinking. “I think if we’re gonna pull this off, we need to… show them, not tell them.” It was instant, the way your hand trembled in his. Immediately he was squeezing around your fingers, silently trying to reassure you. “We don’t have to do this. It’s probably not even gonna work… But again, it’s just something to try.”
You knew you didn’t have to do this. You knew it was probably smarter not to do this. But some small part of you wanted to do this. Some stupidly hopeful part of you.
You sucked a deep breath in through your nose and gave your bottom lip one hard, painful bite. “Fuck it, Kook.” You shifted your hand in his and interlocked your fingers. “Let’s do this.”
His eyes widened, the nickname slipping past your lips like the past two years never even existed. And then he was smiling, this pleasantly surprised smile that you hadn’t seen directed at you in what felt like an eternity.
“I know it was my idea, but I can’t believe this is actually about to happen.” Yoongi was standing next to the two of you, hands holding either side of his face, like he was about to witness the ruse of the century.
“Ready?” Jungkook asked.
“I guess I am.” You shrugged, motioning towards the house. “Let’s do this.”
“Deep breath,” He said before inhaling, and you followed without hesitation.
“Deep breath.” You nodded after you let the air slide past your lips.
And then he was pulling you towards the house, hand in hand, the only thing keeping you from devolving into a panic attack was the way he kept squeezing your hand.
You were approaching the fractured groups of people that stood outside of the sliding glass door, and all it took was one person to notice the two of you, and then suddenly people were pointing and staring, confused expressions appearing like a line of dominos, but you didn’t see any Lambdas or Tri Delts yet thankfully. Though, you knew that wasn’t going to last very long.
You ignored the attention as best as you could as Jungkook opened the door and led you in through the back of the house.
“So what exactly are we gonna do?” You whispered to him as you got closer to the living room; the main room of the house, with the most prying eyes.
He slowed his walk and dropped your hand before placing his palm on your lower back as he continued to usher you forward into the wild circus the two of you were about to create.
“I’m…” He paused as he pushed through the brush of people blocking the hallway until you were standing in the heart of the party. The lights in the house were all dimmed, but you still felt as though there was a bright, blinding spotlight on the two of you.
“You’re gonna what?” You asked, looking around to find Lambdas and Tri Delts lounging in every corner. You started to fidget, wringing your hands and gritting your teeth until you felt someone lightly grabbing your jaw and forcing you to look at them.
“I’m gonna kiss you,” He whispered, hand dropping to cup the side of your face. “I’m gonna kiss you right now, okay?”
Your eyes widened a little, mouth parting. You knew earlier that was what he’d probably meant when he said to ‘show them,’ but now that you were actually here in the moment, with him so close to your face that you could feel his breath hitting your skin… You were freezing up.
“I’m going to,” He said, leaning in closer. “If you changed your mind just push me back, because I’m really about to kiss you.”
A small voice in your head replied that you really wanted him to, as sad as that was. But you kept that thought to yourself as you closed your eyes and said, “Do it.”
His gaze dropped to your mouth and then he closed the gap, a gap that hadn’t been closed in over two years. His lips warm and soft, just like you remembered, suddenly pressing against your own. His hand slid to the back of your neck, the other coming to rest on your hip, the familiar motion in familiar places tugging your fingers like a magnet until they were twisting at the front of his shirt.
You knew that this kiss needed to be believable. It couldn’t be over the top, like you were trying to put on a show, but it also couldn’t be stiff, like the two of you were forcing it. Which technically, you were forcing it. It was pre-planned and clinical… But it didn’t feel that way.
You knew every tilt of his head before he decided to move, every light brush of his tongue before it met your own, every touch of his thumb before it grazed along the column of your throat. You knew everything. You remembered everything. And you wished you could say that there was at least one thing that was different. You wished you could say that when he hummed against your mouth, your stomach didn’t twist. But unfortunately, you couldn’t say that. Because it didn’t just twist — it warped into this undistinguishable, untangleable shape; one that you didn’t think anyone could ever hope to be able to unravel.
It was getting tighter and tighter, tying a knot around your lungs. You thought you’d have to pull away, gasp for air, and maybe ruin this whole charade the two of you were putting on, but all you needed to do was try and focus a little less on Jungkook kissing and touching you, and you’d be able to hear the buzzing chatter that was already surround you on all sides. Your names being shouted in unison breaking you apart.
You pulled back, breath heavy and uneven as you stared at his mouth, and you were at the very least happy that he looked just as uneasy, his eyes dark and hooded and reflecting something that you couldn’t pinpoint. But you weren’t able to just sit there and stare at him forever. You had to face the consequences of what you’d done, and when you turned to face the congregating mob of Lambdas and Tri Delts, complete shock resting on every single one of their faces, you knew this wasn’t going to be easy.
“Y/N?!” People were shouting your name, dozens of them, and you couldn’t tell who they were, but your eyes were locking with two particular people whose voices pulled you straight to them; Sana and Jennie.
“Jungkook, what the hell?!” Someone else said in the distance.
“Okay, literally what the fuck is going on?” Everyone was saying something along these lines to the point that it was just a sea of expletives and confusion, but it was Jimin suddenly climbing on top of the one of the couches that caught the entire room’s attention.
“I fucking knew it!” He yelled, shirt half-unbuttoned and clearly intoxicated as he jumped up and down on the cushions. “I knew something happened with you two last night, you bitch ass liar!” The upside to that proclamation was that it made this entire scene seem a whole hell of a lot more believable.
“What happened last night?” Jennie asked, concern embedded in her features as she and Sana pushed to the front of the crowd.
You couldn’t blame them for these over the top reactions, especially your best friends. They figured that you would tell them anything, and you would. If you actually managed to pull off this ruse, you were going to tell Sana and Jennie the details immediately. But you had to admit, Jungkook was right. Having your best friends raw reactions was making this seem more realistic and not as far-fetched.
You glanced at Jungkook for a second, giving a small nod that said they were just going to have to improvise this as best as they could.
“We… There was more to the talk last night than I told you,” You said, finally responding back to the random questions being thrown in every direction.
“Yeah, I wanted to tell you, Jimin,” Jungkook started. “But it happened so suddenly, and I knew a lot of you guys weren’t going to understand, so we wanted to talk about how we were going to go about telling you guys about this,” He said as he grabbed your hand and interlaced your fingers once more. The small gesture had people gasping as if that was more damning than making out.
“Wait, wait, wait,” Sana rattled off, hands tangling in her hair like her head was about to overheat. “You guys are back together? Y/N, you didn��t say shit about this when I talked to you this morning.”
“I… we’re not back together… yet.” You squeezed his hand, silently telling him that you knew what you were doing. You thought saying you were completely back together was less believable than saying the two of you were simply talking again. “We’re just working through things, and I didn’t wanna jinx it when I was talking to you this morning, but I was going to tell you.”
You could see the hurt flashing through her eyes at you not telling her the truth, even though it wasn’t actually the truth. You wanted to pull her in and apologize, but she would know the actual circumstances soon enough.
“This is in-fucking-sane,” Taehyung said as he also stepped to the front. “Talking? If you’re doing that, you’re basically already back together.”
“Fuck, is that why you got pissed at me for making that comment about Y/N this morning, Kook?” Baekhyun shouted from the back. “I’m sorry, man. I didn’t know!”
This was actually going a lot better than you had anticipated. All of these tiny coincidences of what you had told your friends or the way the two of you had acted since yesterday were building up to be a pretty convincing lie.
“You’re fine,” Jungkook shrugged. “You didn’t know — but now you do.” That last part came out a little more harsh; a believable act from the Lambda president.
“I just don’t get it,” Joy said from somewhere in the middle of the crowd. “You just called him a lying piece of shit literally yesterday.”
Your jaw clenched. This was the part that had worried you the most, the fact that only yesterday the two of you had portrayed a relationship that wasn’t even slightly cordial, and now you were trying to say you had jumped right back into almost being in a relationship? It was a leap, but you were going to have to convince them to take the jump.
“I know I said that,” You started, clearing your throat to try and sound louder and more confident. “But I only said that because I was feeling hurt. We ran into each other after everything that happened yesterday and apologized. We ended up hanging out the entire night and texting all day today, and… and we talked about things that we haven’t talked about in a really, really long time.” That part was true at least. “Honestly, we weren’t going to say anything for a while, because we thought it would be too sudden for you guys, but we’ve been drinking and we kind of just forgot about how you guys might react. I’m sorry it happened like this.”
Everyone was quiet for a second. You looked around and found a slew of people that belonged to neither house recording this entire debacle. You weren’t sure where the two of you should go from here. Should the two of you stay together for the rest of the night or should you go talk to your friends? You didn’t know the best route to take. However, you and Jungkook had to be the luckiest people in the entire world, because you had a friend like Yoongi, who not only gave you ideas that were so crazy that they just might work, but also could get you out of any hiccups that his said crazy plans might run into.
“So everyone knows about the happy couple now?” Yoongi threw his arms around you and Jungkook, a beaming smile staring out at the crowd of stunned Tri Delts and Lambdas. “Perfect, because I’m shit at keeping secrets.”
“Wait, you knew?” Jennie asked.
“Yeah, they were both texting me this morning about all of their gross, mushy feelings.” He faked a gag for good measure. “You guys know I’m friends with both of them so they wanted an impartial opinion. Plus, as their very good friend I’ve wanted them to get back together since they broke up, so I may have pushed them along in the right direction.” You weren’t sure if that was what Yoongi actually felt or if he was just saying it for whatever reason. Either way, you were actually happy because it was only adding to the air of believability. “So instead of standing there like you’re devastated, maybe seem happy for this newly rekindled love?”
“Give us a minute,” Johnny said, his tall head poking up from the crowd in the back. “We’re in shock.”
You finally let yourself look at Jungkook again. He was already waiting for you with a small upward tilt of his lips. To everyone else it probably just looked like a smile between two people who were reconciling, but to you it was a sign of victory. The two of you did it. They believed you — at least for now.
“Okay, can we at least talk to you in private?” Sana asked, now that the crowd was starting to disperse to simmer over this newfound information.
“Yeah, let’s talk.” You nodded and then turned to whisper into Jungkook’s ear. “I’m telling them the truth, but no one else.”
“Yeah, I’m telling Jimin and that’s it,” He murmured.
“Okay,” You said and then quickly pressed a small peck to his lips before dropping his hand and immediately getting dragged away by your friends before you could say a single word.
You spent the next half hour explaining to them every detail of the Great Greek Ruse Yoongi had cooked up, and by the end of it they were completely slack jawed before disintegrating into a fit of laughter at just how insane the two of you must have been to try and pull off something like that.
Your only response to them being that there were only a few things in life that could end a war that was saturated in as much hostility as the one between the Tri Delts and the Lambdas; love being one of them — even if it was fake.
———---
The party continued on after that. Your friends not allowing you out of their sights as they bombarded you with every idea that danced through their heads about how to keep the ploy of yours and Jungkook’s fake relationship up for as long as possible, and how the two of you were going to go about hooking up with people without everyone finding out. You were actually thankful for that, because you and Jungkook hadn’t gotten a chance to work out the logistics of how you were going to act in public.
You simply listened as Sana and Jennie amused themselves with this situation that their best friend had gotten themself involved in when you felt your phone buzz in your pocket. You pulled it out, Jungkook’s contact flashed across the screen with a text. You should probably get around to changing his contact name from ‘Jungkook the Jackass’ in case anyone ever caught a glance at your phone. Meet me out front, the text said.
“I’ll be right back,” You told Sana and Jennie as you lifted yourself off of the couch. “I’ve gotta talk to Jungkook.”
“Tell your lover I said hello!” Sana chuckled, no longer having that hurt like in her eye from earlier now that she was in on everything.
You quickly moved through the crowd of people that was now beginning to thin as the night got later and later before stepping past the front door. You looked around for a second before you noticed Jungkook standing at the base of the driveway waiting for you. He spotted you, motioning for you to come down. You wondered what he wanted. Probably to just gloat in relief that their idiot plan actually succeeded.
“Hey,” You whispered as you decided to stand a little bit closer to him than you normally would just in case anyone was watching. “What’s up?”
He looked around, presumably to make sure no one was in ear shot, and when he found that the coast was clear he turned towards you, an ecstatic grin staring at you. “I can’t believe that actually worked.”
“I can’t either. Yoongi was right. They really are like toddlers.” You laughed.
“Yeah, I mean we don’t know for sure yet if this is actually gonna stop them from fighting, but I saw some of the members who I know have had issues in the past actually talking, so I think that’s a good sign.”
“Yeah, I saw them too.” Lambdas and Tri Delts who had pulled some pretty spectacular pranks on one another seen speaking in what looked to be a respectful manner? A complete miracle. “How’d Jimin take the news?”
“Oh, he thinks it’s completely hilarious.” Jungkook chuckled.
You smiled. “Sana and Jennie think the same.”
“I figured they would. Though seeing them that pissed off was kind of funny.” He paused, looking off into the distance before shoving his hand into his pockets. “But anyways, the reason I called you out here was to give you this.” He pulled his hand out of his pocket and made a fist in front of you. You opened your palm to receive whatever he was trying to give you; a single key suddenly falling into your grasp. “I have a spare in my car, but that’s the key to my apartment — or I guess our apartment now.” He laughed, scratching awkwardly at the back of his neck.
You had been so focused on the fake dating aspect of this predicament that you had almost forgotten about your living situation. You held it up between the two of you. You couldn’t believe this was actually happening. You were about to move in with your ex, while everyone except for your best friends believed that you were back together.
“Are we really gonna do this?” You finally asked.
“I don’t see why we wouldn’t be able to make it work. I think the past two days showed that we can be around each other and not act crazy.”
You agreed that things had definitely shifted, and not just because you had to pretend to be in a relationship now. You wanted to think that you could make it work, that you could put your petty, bitter ways behind you.
And when you told Jungkook that you felt the exact same way about making things work before leaving to go home for one of your last few nights in the Tri Delt house, you truly meant what you had said to him… But sometimes situations happen, and as they say, old habits die hard.
--------
three days later
You were completely out of breath as you climbed the stairs to your new apartment building, about a dozen duffle bags filled with your various belongings were wrapped around your body as you tried to keep your phone smashed between your shoulder and your ear.
“Why’d you decide to move out early?” Jennie whined from the otherside of the line. “Did you wanna get away from us that bad?”
You tried to muster a laugh as you attempted to make it up the final few steps without passing out. “Of course I wanted to stay longer, but both of my classes got cancelled, and I’d rather just get it over with than have to deal with it on a Friday like I was going to.”
“Yeah, yeah, I get it.” She huffed. “But I’m still not happy about you having to live with the devil’s spawn.”
You tsked at her. “Hey, we’re all trying to get along now, remember?”
“I know… But I’m still acting like a bitch to Jimin, I don’t care,” She added quickly.
“Well, that one I’m okay with.” You chuckled. “But I just got to my apartment, so I’ll call you back in a little bit, okay?”
“Okay, talk to you later.” And then the line went dead and you were fishing for the key that Jungkook had handed you outside of Kappa Sigma on Saturday night.
You couldn’t believe it had only been three days, but in those three days things had been going okay, actually. There had been no incidents involving either the Tri Delt or Lambda house, and after the everyday, non-stop antics from the past few years, that was as close to divine intervention as you could get. So yes, you could say that maybe you had developed a slight bit of optimism. Everything was working out at the sorority, you actually had a place to live — things truly were going well. But you should’ve known that when things were going well, Jeon Jungkook was always there to throw a wrench in your happiness, because as you wiggled the key inside of the lock and pushed your way inside, the last thing you had ever wanted to see in your entire life was staring right back at you.
Your ex-boyfriend, who publicly was once again your actual boyfriend, whom you still had occasional feelings of longing for, was currently balls-deep in a girl on his living room couch — which was now also your living room couch.
The door slammed against the wall before you could stop it, both of their terrified faces suddenly turning to you as they immediately yanked a blanket over their naked bodies.
“Jesus Christ, Y/N!” Jungkook yelled. “You said you were coming Friday!”
You couldn’t help it. The tiny, petty demon you had tried to squash down in size over the past few days was suddenly bubbling over at the flare of emotions ricocheting inside of your head. Your teeth gritted together, eyes cutting daggers across his skin as you forced a saccharine smile as fake as this relationship.
“Well, honey, I’m home now.”
#bts#bts fanfic#jungkook#jungkook fanfic#jeon jungkook#jeon jungkook fanfic#kpop fanfic#bts angst#jungkook angst#fanfiction
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The Report Card – Fantasy High: The Seven Ep 2
The Girls Are Fighting!!!
We return to Aguefort Adventuring Academy where the man himself has just told the Seven Maidens that their party is being split up which they are NOT having even though it doesn’t seem to be a malicious plot so much as the fact that Danielle, Ostentatia, and Zelda are Juniors while the other four are graduating Seniors. Antiope casts Hunter’s Mark on Aguefort, Penny pleads, Katja threatens (well, “threatens”; she walks up menacingly and then says that he can’t do this because it’s the only group of friends she’s ever had and it’s heartbreaking like all of her non-hilarious dialogue is).
Aguefort understands that it sucks and has no respect for rules but says it’s out of his hands. Sam clocks that he’s hiding something (along with the fact that he seems to know about something going on with Antiope and Penny which we know is their respective internship/apprenticeship offers) and calls him out, hitting him with a Lightning Lure to drag his ass back when he tries to turn into a bat and escape out the window. She’s unhinged and I love it.
So does Aguefort who decides to let them in on some school secrets, leaving a decoy while he leads them all to the super secret part of the forbidden library which is bondage themed because sure. Also, Ostentatia is topless for this also because sure. He does a lot of pomp and circumstance to summon a book which Yelle flatly says better not just be the syllabus and it isn’t but she’s close. It’s the bylaws of the school district which he has summoned for the guidelines on the special, magical thing the girls can get so they can graduate together…
Their GEDS!!!!! Trés mystical.
Basically what they need to do is complete a level A, B, or C quest together (which Antiope knows are like the top 3 highest difficulty quests--they go from A-F) and get signoff from the superintendent. But the superintendent has been missing for 12 years and there can’t be a new one until she’s dead (which she isn’t or else they’d be able to appoint a new one). Her name is Tectonya Karkovnya (who I will be calling TK) and Aguefort calls her, “chaotic and impossible to predict,” which coming from him is como se dice, troubling.
Sam pulls out her mirror to do a little snooping on TK’s past and sees that she’s a coppery, earth genasi woman. She also sees her talking to Aguefort and saying that the magic of consciousness is far superior to his beloved chronomancy. Then the scene shifts to show her getting more and more worried as she got deeper into her studies and then going to a dwarven holy site in the Mountains of Chaos with some kind of shadow figure following her.
Penny gets photos of the super cursed bylaws and Arthur leaves since he very much is the principal of the school and has to do his job (ostensibly). With Aguefort gone, the girls discuss the proposition after conscripting a very reluctant Antiope to be their leader (Aabria hilariously improvises that a shaft of sunlight somehow comes down to illuminate her and she has to step out of the spotlight).
They discuss whether they want to do this GED quest or not and Zelda says she wants to but she wants to give anyone who has other stuff going on an out so they don’t feel beholden. Ostentatia immediately shoots back that Zelda is just saying that because she has plans with Gorgug. That brings down the mood and Sam, despite being a water genasi, fans the flames by saying that Gorgug has lots going on that doesn’t involve her so she shouldn’t be running back to him all the time.
Yelle tries to calm things down and says they should sleep on it but Sam and Ostentatia are taking this super personally and are offended that they’re even having this conversation. Penny accidentally lets slip that she has some kind of apprenticeship (she’s trying to keep it on the DL because it’s supposed to be a secret) and oh man it becomes a Whole Thing. They fight in the way that you do when everyone in the fight actually wants the same thing and cares deeply about each other but are in completely different headspaces which are making them lash out.
Penny, not wanting to be around the conflict, goes invisible. Zelda is suppressing going into a rage and says that maybe she should go be with Gorgug. At least he won’t yell at her. Yelle once again tries to cool things down and suggests they have a text thread where they can say if they’re in or out by the end of the night instead of hashing it out in the open. She’s accused of not being in and, in response, texts that she’s in. Ostentatia and Sam also immediately text that they’re in, which basically makes her “solution” entirely moot.
Zelda is finally fully fed up and leaves (Penny following invisibly). Katja also follows.
Antiope can tell that Sam is upset about something that’s not this but Sam brushes her off rudely and storms off (quite literally, causing storm clouds outside in her wake). Yelle goes after her. Ostentatia is left with Antiope.
Time for a string of very emotional mini scenes which I highly encourage you to watch because they are peak improv.
Zelda, Katja, (Invisible) Penny
Katja runs to find Zelda who is under a tree crying and asks if she’s OK. Zelda says that Sam and Ostentatia are so beautiful and confident and eloquent and she gets so tongue tied and useless when they disagree with her because she’s so timid. Zelda wants this so bad but she doesn’t want to feel like she’s forcing her friends to stay with her.
Katja, as we know, has major abandonment issues because of her constantly away dad (and prob her mom too) and she doesn’t want to be left behind again but she also doesn’t want her friends to factor her in so she tries to be stoic and says that the people you love have to want to stay. But with a 3, Zelda immediately clocks the emotion behind the words. Instead of calling her out, Zelda offers to listen to music with her.
Penny takes this opportunity to make herself known (which has got to be terrifying--unless you’re used to it and then it’s like same shit as usual from Ms. Luckstone) and Zelda goat jumps to grab her out of the tree she was crying in above them and tells her that she doesn’t have to go invisible every time there’s conflict. They all agree that they hate confrontation and Rehka gets the funniest lowkey line of the episodes: that she wouldn’t know what to do if they didn’t agree on that. We then cut to…
Ostentatia and Antiope
Where Izzy gets the high key funniest moment of the episode by transitioning in with a big, “You know I LOVE confrontation,” which breaks everyone at the table. But she says it as a preface to admitting that she may have been a bit of a bitch to Zelda. She plays coy for like a half second before she breaks down sobbing with Antiope catching her before she sinks fully to the floor. Antiope comforts her and admits that while she wants to stay with the party, she hates having options taken away from her as they have been her whole life effectively. She was honestly kind of relieved when she was trapped in the crystal because it meant all that pressure was gone for a bit. They affirm that they love each other then Ostentatia goes to apologize to Zelda.
Danielle and Sam
Yelle goes to talk to Sam (who she adorably calls “merbae”) and while Sam doesn’t wanna talk about it, Yelle says they don’t have to. She just wants to be there for her in whatever capacity she needs. She knows Sam loves her friends and would never hurt them on purpose so something must be wrong with her-- “History of abandonment?” Sam finishes, almost glibly. She’s tired of losing people. She doesn’t want to lose more. She doesn’t want things to change. Nature is change, Yelle says. Nature sucks, Sam says. Yelle is gonna pretend like she didn't hear that.
Sam feels bad that she snapped at Zelda and Yelle says that they’re all a family. Things will be alright. The storm clouds that Sam reflexively summoned peter out into a cool, refreshing mist.
Ostentatia and Zelda
Ostentatia goes to where Zelda and the girls are and full ass runs at her like they weren’t just fighting. After assuring her that she’s not there to fight she apologizes, saying she was a cow. Zelda says she honestly agrees with Ostentatia that she wants the group to stay together and wishes she could be bolder in non-rage settings. Ostentatia says that maybe if the Seniors leave they can still have a party and Penny vetos that even though, as Ostentatia says, it’s a pretty reasonable compromise. Anyway, they basically all go in a circle saying they love each other and it’s very sweet.
I’m serious, I can’t do these heart to hearts justice in this format, just go watch them for that emotional girl group goodness.
Anyway, outside of the main group, Antiope goes to talk to her sister Corsica who is currently teaching a class. Antiope does not give AF. She orders the students out and they scatter. Wouldn’t you?
Antiope wants advice. Should she stay with her party after flaming out of her last one? Should she take the internship and stay on the path her parents want her on? Corsica really feels for her. Antiope has had to struggle in a way that she and their brothers never did. She finally answers that she and her brothers are awesome and successful fighters but none of them have been able to do the scariest thing possible: disappoint their parents. They’re soldiers. They like it that way. They fall in line. But maybe Antiope isn’t a soldier. Maybe she’s a leader. She ordered those kids out of the room without thinking after all and they obeyed. It’s an extremely good speech and Antiope basically has chills, as do I.
I assume while this is happening or perhaps right before everyone goes home, Penny goes to see Jawbone (who has some spiffy new art--as did Gilear who cameoed early in the episode when Aguefort atomic wedgied him invisibly because sure) and talk about this uber difficult decision she had to make. Jawbone gets to the heart of the matter pretty quick. Penny is a high achiever who’s lived a life without choice. But now that she’s about to be off the rails for the time she’s freaking out. Penny sees the truth in the statement (after hilariously trying to solve his metaphor about an amusement park) and thanks him for the perspective. She then, in a very Fig move, tries to kiss him and Jawbone basically stiff arms her and breezes right past like it didn’t happen, showing her out. What a trooper that Jawbone.
Moving on to Katja. When she gets home she tries to call her dad who is unreachable on his hell mission. She leaves him a message saying that he should call her back when he can and she knows what she wants for her graduation present now. She wants her party to not break up. This breaks Brennan and me.
She then snoops arounds for info on TK. She sees letters of her dad trying to get her into Hudol. And she sees some stuff from the Ministry of Adventure, asking if he knew where TK was. But she doesn’t get anything else. At least, she doesn’t get anything else that’s helpful. She does however find a picture of her mom which makes her bolt to go talk to Cinnamon who prances for her to make her feel better. She joins in dancing, badly.
EDIT: I initially wrote that Katja’s mom was dead because that’s what I thought she said but @ennn said that in the Adventuring Party, Rekha said that her mom didn’t die, she left. Which is less dramatic in some ways but SO MUCH WORSE for abandonment issues so, yikes girl!
Yelle meanwhile goes home to talk to her unofficial third mom, Holly, who is the awakened tree under which her house is. Picture a Grandmother Willow situation from Pocahantas basically. Yelle talks about the conflict a bit and, as usual, ends up on a tangent about how the world is unfair and she has to speak for the voiceless. Holly is concerned for her (as are her other moms which I may have neglected to mention in the last recap). She asks Yelle if she can tell her something that might be painful. Yelle agrees. Holly says that Yelle is great and wonderful and kind but she spends so much time speaking for other people that she never speaks for herself. Her moms worry that there will come a day when she needs help and will have to ask for it without couching it in terms of the greater good and she won’t be able to.
Yelle really hopes she’s high when the time comes.
At her home, Ostentatia casts Commune With The City to see if TK has been around and she’s not there now but she can tell she has been (though there’s no indication on if that’s recently or not). On a 17 religion check she knows that there is a dwarven holy site in the mountains that matches Sam’s description from the mirror. She’s still avoiding her dad but when she prays for her spells, she asks for her dad to feel like himself again too.
Hey, what time is it? Let me check my watch.
Ah yes, it’s time for Sam to make some rash decisions.
She feels like she should text Zelda but doesn’t. Instead, she goes into Penelope’s room. And she takes out her mirror. And even though she’s expended the charge for today, she tries to make it show her Penelope.
OK, says Brennan. Sure. Hey, can you roll me a quick little Wisdom Save?
5.
Haha, Sam’s in danger.
The mirror heats up as it’s pushed beyond its limits and Sam sees an image of a young Penelope with braces grabbing her hands and grinning and saying that they’ll be best friends. Then, the image shifts and she sees the Penelope of the present in her tattered prom queen dress and glass shard crown. Her eyeless, haunting, demon prom queen form, teeth razor sharp as her words.
“A call without a text,” she says. “Are you out of your mind?”
“You look better than you ever did alive,” Sam spits back.
It is a battle of the bitches right out of the gate. The girls are fighting part two if you will. They snipe at each other for a bit and Brennan has Sam roll insight into herself. On a 19, Sephie says that’s not enough for Sam to get a read on herself (yikes girl) so she doesn’t understand that this fight can only ruin her because while Penelope enjoys causing people pain, Sam doesn’t.
They both get in some very choice barbs but when Penelope tries to entice her into making a devilish pact and disparages her new party, Sam does the mic drop of the century by telling her that her parents are divorcing and hanging up. The entire table LOSES THEIR MIND. It is like a real life representation of one of those Draw The Squad memes. Everyone brandishes their fans in a salute to that truly epic conversation ender.
As the night draws to a close, Brennan asks the girls who haven’t responded to the text chain yet if they respond. Katja texts that she’s in. Zelda texts Antiope and Penny that she’s not going to text whether she’s in or out until they respond because she doesn’t want it to feel like a 5 on 2 dogpile.
Antiope and Penny call then text, then call, then text, then call each other to discuss what they should do and also hype each other up because with all the drama, they didn’t really get to celebrate their opportunities. Penny tries to downplay her thing and insinuates that it wouldn’t be a big loss if she wasn’t in the group anymore and Antiope shuts that down immediately. You’re the last thing so many people see before they die Penny! That’s so cool!
They both decide to text that they’re abstaining from voting for now and go to bed.
The next day, Antiope gets up and sees that her party’s schedule has been cleared for the next two weeks by the school for quest reasons. She tells her dad she wants to talk to Charity Blythe (the woman at the Ministry of Adventure she needs to talk do) and he sets up a no pressure (but actually tons of pressure) meeting with her before turning her 5 mile run into a 12 mile run because she is a Jones and 5 mile runs are for Amateurs.
Ant texts the rest of the Maidens that this meeting is happening so they can maybe get some quest info from Charity and Ostentatia has in the meantime texted (after the 2 abstains) that she will be going for the GED regardless and anyone who wants to join can. Of course, there was never any reason to NOT go for it (besides the danger which they obv don’t care about) and getting it doesn’t mean any doors are closed to them. It’s just that emotions are running so high they can’t fully seem to see that (or at least some members can’t).
Ant doesn’t have the clearance to meet at Charity’s office so they meet at the Museum of Adventuring instead. In it happens to be the skeleton of Kalvaxus who they killed (if you don’t remember, the Bad Kids killed him first and then he was resurrected so the Maidens could also kill him for catharsis reasons). Tensions are still super high as evidenced by Sam’s snide abstention comment to Penny and Ant and then by her TRYING TO LIGHTNING BOLT THE DRAGON SKELETON TO DESTROY IT.
GIRL.
That doesn't happen though because she’s Counterspelled by Charity Blythe who walks in, surprised to see that Antiope brought her whole party. Antiope says they were just leaving but Charity can sense shenanigans when she sees them and says if they’re gonna spy on the conversation they might as well stay for it which they of course do.
She gives Antiope a rundown of the internship: 1 year commitment with a possibility to expand to 2-3 years. Stipend. She’d have to live in Bastion City.
Katja remembers that her dad was talking to the Ministry of Adventure in the letters she found and asks Charity about it. Charity says they were asking him about TK’s whereabouts because he was friends with her. On that, Yelle casts Detect Thoughts with a Stealth roll of 17 (we see on a secret Box of Doom roll that Charity got a 26 to see her cast it). Anyway, she sees that TK took some object with her when she disappeared (which she later sees is a crystal screen with a map seemingly marking quest locations from A-F) and of course the fact that Charity knows this. Yelle shares this info with everyone as Antiope walks off with Charity to talk further. Katja suggests to the group that maybe Ant should take the internship to get more info for their quest. While she’s talking to Charity, Ant feels the hairs on the back of her neck stand up.
See looks up and sees a figure with blood red lips look at her and disappear.
Yikes! Combat time baybee!
Superlatives
Danielle: Most Likely to Talk Her Way Out of a Hostage Situation
While, like her mothers, I am slightly concerned that Danielle is the type to set fire to herself to make sure others are warm, I also very much love her chill, warm, encouraging vibes. For those of you coming off of MisMag, she is like vibing at the same wavelength as Whitney Jammer but with the intensity turned all the way down. Danielle encouraging Sam honestly gave me like second hand calm. Excellent vibes.
Random Thoughts
If you’re wondering how long it took for it to come up that Aguefort banged a phoenix, the answer is 12 minutes.
The concept of phoenix chlamydia is the definition of thanks, I hate it.
Aguefort saying that TK is a crazy person could literally mean anything tbh. It could mean she is the most batshit person on the planet or it could mean she’s totally normal and just kinda bugs him. Literally no way to tell.
Someone (I think Rekha?) mentioned that the cursed bylaws book is copper and so is TK. Idk if that’s relevant but thought I’d flag it anyway.
We learn in this episode that the friendship bracelets Penny made them last week let them track each other and see each other even if one of the in knocked out (which is what gives it utility outside of what their crystals can already do).
We learn in this episode that Skullcleaver Elementary School is actually named after Katja’s family.
Nothing like the fear you feel when a DM gives you what you wanted even on a failure. And on that note...
Sam, I wish you a very happy Please Go To Therapy. Please girl.
This episode was such an emotional roller coaster. I deeply empathize with the horrible feeling that your friends have stuff going on and you don’t and you’re going to be left behind. It’s so rough to see everyone hurting and lashing out (or in the case of Yelle for instance, trying and failing to diffuse the situation). But it’s so nice to see everyone trying to be there for each other and apologizing and affirming that they love each other (from Antiope saying that she would kill and die for any of them to Danielle defusing the ticking timebomb that is Sam). The players really get the cadence of how teenage girl friendship works and it’s such a treat to watch.
“Did we ruin your life?”
Do you think ep 7 of The Seven is gonna be when everything pops off? As a DM I wouldn’t be able to resist that.
Penny’s response to being told that she can’t take every path is, “You can with chronomancy” which isn’t a bad point.
Rekha is the Zac of The Seven which is to say low key the funniest person on the planet. Her saying she was so scared that she wasn’t gonna be told “I love you” during that scene was so funny. Her comic timing is impeccable.
Katja fainting at the end of the “I love you” session after Penny says she loves her and Cinnamon.
I love the table ambient whisper of, “LCAB” under Antiope’s scene with Corsica.
I really felt for Zelda in this episode. Like, I felt for everyone but especially her, being the quiet one with all this yelling happening. When she was talking about how much she hates to have to fight with Sam/O my heart really broke for her. I’m so glad she got all her hugs in after that.
In this episode Katja, Ostentatia, and Sam roll nat 1s. No nat 20s.
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Hello! if its ok how would the demon brothers react to a low self esteem/ self hating MC who excepts any insults with a sad smile?
Content Warnings: Self deprecation (naturally, given the nature of the prompt), verbal harassment/insults, spoilers for later chapters in Belphegor’s section
Just so you know it’s basically gonna be seven different versions of this:
Under a cut to prevent carpal tunnel!
Obey Me: The Brothers With an MC Who Has Low Self Esteem and Accepts Insults with a Smile
Lucifer
Lucifer kind of just... stops for a few seconds. Like, he freezes completely. Doesn’t move, doesn’t blink - MC’s not sure if he’s even breathing. They’re at one of Diavolo’s parties together, and a pretty important demon is coming for MC hard, albeit in a slimy, passive-aggressive kind of way. And they’re just... smiling and nodding along?
Lucifer’s single currently operating brain cell is dedicated to not just murdering this pathetic excuse for a demon. If he wasn’t already in his demon form, he would absolutely transform. With a deep breath, he stalks over in full Avatar of Pride mode: shoulders back, staring slightly down at everyone else, wings puffed up just so.
Anything the demon was saying to MC, he throws back at them tenfold, with just as much passive-aggression, though it starts slipping more and more as he continues on. Eventually it starts turning into one of those lectures of his about The Importance of The Exchange Program and Lord Diavolo’s Reputation and- MC is gonna have to catch his attention to stop him from going full Dad-mode on this bastard.
Once they succeed in doing this, he pulls them aside and, still bristling with indignant rage, asks why MC was letting that wretch talk to them like that.
“Well, it wasn’t like they were saying anything that wasn’t true...”
Wrong. Answer. Lucifer is the Avatar of Pride, even though he has self-worth issues running deeper than the Marianas Trench he would never let anyone talk to him like that, and he wishes more than anything he could lend MC that ability. He’ll tilt their head to look him directly in the eyes and assure them that they absolutely do have value, both in the Devildom and in his family. He won’t tolerate anyone, including MC themself, put down a member of his family. Is that clear?
In the coming weeks, the younger brothers notice that Lucifer’s soft spot for MC is even more pronounced than usual. In fact, he frequently praises them for their accomplishments, flustering them to no end. None of them dare to bring it to his attention, because they’ve all noticed in one way or another that MC is carrying themself with more confidence now.
Whatever is going on between the two of them seems to be working quite well.
Mammon
Mammon... runs his mouth a lot. He says stupid things he doesn’t mean because admitting his actual feelings would be too difficult. Unfortunately, one of the feelings he’s vehemently avoiding addressing is his feelings for MC. This manifests as loud and insistent denial that The GREAT Mammon would never be interested in some stupid, weak human, how dare you suggest that?!
The brothers expect one of many responses from MC: outrage and offence, teasing at Mammon’s clear tsundere attitude, a roll of the eyes, anything other than their sad little smile whenever he insults them. One day, Mammon finally notices their staring and he actually stops and takes a minute to process the acceptance on MC’s face.
He just called them a burden and a waste of time and they’re SMILING?!
Like a horrid puzzle piece, everything clicks together in Mammon’s mind. He’s never heard MC protest any of the awful things he’s said about them. They don’t even tease him about it like his brothers do.
They think he’s being serious and they agree with him.
He changes his tune so fast it’s dizzying. He slips up sometimes, but now when he sees MC’s small smile that doesn’t reach their eyes, he adds, “H-Hey! Why’re you just letting me say all that, huh? Ya gotta stand up for yourself, MC! You better not go around letting lesser demons talk to you like this! If anyone ever gives you trouble, you come to the GREAT Mammon and I’ll shut ‘em up real quick!
“‘Cause... It’s not true, all of that about you being stupid or annoying. You’re my human and I know you really well and you’re- You’re not any of that, MC! So don’t go smiling at jerks dragging your name through the mud okay?”
Leviathan
MC and Leviathan are playing an online multiplayer game together, and MC still hasn’t quite gotten used to Devildom controls yet. They’re not exactly a great asset to their team... Not that Levi minds. He’s happy they’re showing interest in him his games at all.
Some of the demons they’re playing with, on the other hand...
Ugh, stay on the objective you stupid bitch!
Is [MC’s username] afk?
If you feed them any more kills I fucking swear-
Why is a noob even playing this game lmao just go die already
Levi scoffs. Their team wasn’t even losing, these scumbags just needed to find someone to pick on. Still, it wasn’t fair for MC to listen to their insults, he’ll just disconnect and find a better team - hey, why has MC been so quiet?
The Avatar of Envy turns to face MC only to see them staring down at their controller with a shaky smile. He calls their name and they look up, startled.
“I’m gonna find another team for us to play on,” Levi explains as the game warns him that he’s about to lose some in-game reputation points for abandoning his team. “Uh, unless you’d rather play something else?”
“No it’s fine, you pick,” MC says, still avoiding making direct eye contact. “I probably won’t do any better no matter what we play...”
Hey, insecurity is his thing!
“MC, you better not be thinking about what those losers said in the chat!”
“But-”
“NUH UH! You might be a normie, but you’re also my best friend!” MC feels an anime-inspired speech coming on. “Who cares about winning or losing one match? I’d rather lose every match I ever play from now on if it means I get to have you as my player 2!” Leviathan pauses as he realizes exactly what he just said and immediately turns beet red. “...you know... if you... wanted to, I guess...”
Satan
MC is in Devildom History with Satan, and as an exchange student, is having a rough time of it. They just don’t have the same background as the rest of the students, and can’t pick up on things as fast as they do.The teacher hands back the latest test and they cringe as they see their grade. Satan, sitting next to them, glances at the mark and gives them one of his small smiles.
“You know, if you need extra help, don’t be shy. I’d be happy to help you,” he says quietly.
Apparently not quietly enough, because a particularly rowdy pair of demons overhear him and choose that moment to make a nuisance of themselves. One of them snatches MC’s paper out of their hands, and upon seeing their grade starts laughing.
“How did you put the Abyssal Peace Treaty before the Abyssal War?! Everyone knows when that happened!” they continue chuckling at more silly mistakes MC made while very stressed during that test, while Satan’s blood starts boiling.
Much to his surprise, MC just smiles and joins in the demons’ laughter. “Yeah, that was pretty stupid...” they say with a falsely cheerful tone. Satan quickly catches on - they’re just fucking with these demons! He keeps his anger at bay with the anticipation of seeing MC really tear these lowlives a new-
“Wow, not even gonna defend yourself? Why do we even have human exchange students, they’re so boring.” The demon pair scoff and toss MC’s test back, before stalking off, annoyed that they didn’t get the reaction they wanted.
Hm. Frustrate them by not responding to their futile taunts. An interesting choice, but effective nonetheless. Satan expresses his appreciation of MC’s choice, much to their confusion. When they explain that they really were agreeing with what the demons had said, Satan doesn’t take it very well.
If MC doesn’t stop him, he’ll go over to the pair of demons that insulted them and drag their names through the dirt in front of the entire classroom, adding in some colourful suggestions about what would happen to them if they continued this behaviour. Either way, he’s furious enough that his demon form might start peeking out, tail thrashing behind him or horns growing out from his messy hair.
When class is over, Satan asks MC to stay behind.
“I want you to tell me why you feel this way about yourself,” he says. “Because I promise you, there isn’t a single explanation you can give that I won’t argue against. And I’m rarely wrong.”
Asmodeus
Asmo lives in a delightful bubble of flirtation, partying, and being the very best and prettiest being in all three realms. He works very hard to maintain this state, terrified of what he’d find on the other side of the haze.
But all it takes is one look at MC for it to come crashing down.
They’re at The Fall together, sipping on fruity drinks disguising unholy amounts of alcohol for a brief break before returning to the dance floor. Asmo knows MC struggles with confidence, and figured that if he could get them to have a good time, they would forget their insecurities for at least a little while.
And maybe he’s laying it on a bit thick with the flirting while they’re here. He can’t help it! He loves MC in a way he’s never really loved anyone else before. If he’s completely honest, the feeling scares him: he wants to put them before himself, and he’s not sure if he can, because he never has put someone else first before.
A demon notices Asmo’s lovesick staring at MC, and comments as they pass, “Oh my, has the Avatar of Lust sunken so low that he’s making eyes at some plain-jane human?” A long, scaled tail snakes around MC’s face, turning their head in the demon’s direction. “Or are you just a charity-fuck? You certainly won’t be able to hold his interest for long, darling.~”
The demon saunters off, and Asmodeus has half a mind to storm over to them and cause a scene, but the look on MC’s face stops him in his tracks.
They’re looking at him and they’re smiling.
“You don’t have to pretend to be upset about it,” they say, poking at their drink with their straw. “I know I’m not all that interesting. You just want me right now because I’m an ordinary human, right? And once the novelty wears off, well... I’m not powerful like a demon, or a wise magic user like Solomon, and I’m not exactly good-looking, so why keep me around? It’s been nice of you to pretend with me, though-”
He cuts them off with a passionate kiss, threading his fingers in their hair and pressing their bodies as close as possible. The gesture catches MC off guard and their drink spills on the two of them, but Asmo doesn’t even flinch. He only pulls away when MC starts panting from lack of oxygen.
“Please don’t say those awful things about yourself, MC,” Asmodeus says, eyes brimming with tears. “You’re...” One of the only people I don’t have to pretend around. “...You are so special to me. And you always will be.” Suddenly aware that they’ve both been soaked in a cocktail, Asmo smirks. “Oh dear, it seems our clothes are all dirty... I guess we’ll have to go back home and change, won’t we?”
Please let me prove to you how much I love you, he thinks as you tearfully smile and punch his arm before agreeing.
Beelzebub
Beel deals with survivor’s guilt, and if he’s not careful, it can lead to some pretty dark places. He’s also Belphie’s twin and is very familiar with what low self-esteem looks like. So whenever a demon tries to insult MC while he’s around, he doesn’t give them the chance to agree, calmly, but firmly jumping to their defence.
It doesn’t matter who it is or where they are, Beel always has MC’s back. Whenever they’re feeling especially down and that sad little smile is on their face, MC tends to find some of their favourite snacks tucked away into their bag or even their uniform pockets. The Avatar of Gluttony is also always ready to deploy some Emergency Cuddles, and is generally a steady, grounding presence in MC’s life. He starts to stick around them almost as much as Mammon does.
Unfortunately, this attracts the attention of some less than savoury people.
“Hey Beel! Coach wants you to know we’ve got an extra practice tomorrow! It’s semi-finals soon, and he wants to go over some new strategies,” a large, intimidating demon calls out, dressed in the RAD athletic uniform.
MC and Beel turn towards the demon’s voice, and Beel’s teammate makes a face upon seeing them. “You’re still hanging around them?” the demon asks. “Or are they clinging onto ya like a barnacle?” He laughs and MC lets go of Beel’s hand, blushing.
They have been around him an awful lot lately... Is he only doing it out of pity? Should they stop? Oh no, what if he thinks they’re annoying--
“I like MC,” Beel says plainly. “And I like spending time with them. So, tomorrow after classes is the next practice? I’ll be there.” He leaves no room for further debate. The demon stumbles over his words before confirming and abruptly running off.
MC doesn’t take Beel’s hand again.
“Hey,” Beelzebub takes MC’s much smaller hands into his own. “I mean it. I like you. Don’t listen to my teammate, he’s dumber than Mammon. Want to go have lunch together? I think they’re serving fried bats in the cafeteria...”
Belphegor
Sometimes, Belphegor peeks in on MC’s dreams. He never directly interacts with them, nor has he ever told them that he does this at all. Ever since he... ever since that happened, he’s made a conscious effort to avoid creeping them out even further, and he worries that this kind of behaviour would be frowned upon by a human.
But he can’t help it. Especially tonight.
After being woken up by a squirming MC, he decides to look into their dreams and see what is upsetting them so much. Much to his surprise, he finds himself inside one of RAD’s classrooms. MC is working on an assignment with a group of demons whose features keep shifting around. The writing on the books in front of them is illegible, and Belphegor only knows it’s writing at all because of his familiarity with dream physics.
“There they are,” whispers one of the demons. “What do they think they’re doing?”
MC asks a question about something in one of the books, pointing to a scribble that only looks like words when not focused on.
“Why do you care? It’s not like you can do anything useful for us anyway,” the demon snaps. “I’m not even sure why you’re here.” Belphegor frowns. Is this a memory?
MC meekly mentions the exchange program. “I don’t care!” The demon’s voice changes, and Belphegor suddenly feels the pitter-patter of raindrops on his skin, despite still being indoors. MC’s clothes are drenched in the invisible rain. “Fuck, can you not take a hint, MC? No one actually wants you here! You’re just a tag-along!”
“Why don’t you just pack up and leave then? Oh right, you have nowhere else to go!”
The figures of the demons become shadowy and elongated, hands sharpening into talons. MC jumps to their feet and backs away from the advancing figures, whose whispers become louder and interrupt each other.
“Just don’t mess it up again-”
“-never have trusted you! You ruin EVERYTHING-”
“Another disappointment, I see.”
“Don’t LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT-”
“Fucking whore!”
The voices continue, growing louder and louder until the figures melt into one familiar silhouette with violet eyes.
“You’re so stupid that I can’t help but laugh.” Belphegor’s blood runs cold. “You humans really are foolish, idiotic, weak creatures, aren’t you?”
The Avatar of Sloth watches helplessly as his dream-double wraps its hands around MC’s throat, cooing hideous insults at them all the while. Nonononono, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to- I didn’t know, I was just so- Ugh! That’s not an excuse, you idiot!
The dream-Belphegor pauses, grip slackening.
“Get off of them,” Belphegor hisses. “Now.”
The figure dissolves into the classroom, turning the surroundings completely black. Now Belphie finds himself standing in the creature’s place, in front of a confused MC.
“Are you okay?” he asks lamely.
“Why did you stop?” MC asks in return.
“I wasn’t... It was hurting you, and saying- I couldn’t keep letting it-”
MC smiles. “It’s just the truth. You said so yourself.”
MC and Belphegor wake up together, sweating, trapped in the other’s vice-like grip. MC’s pulse flutters under Belphie’s hands, way faster than it should be. It almost feels like when-
He twists out of their grasp, falling out of the bed in the process. He scrambles as far back as his room allows, nearly tripping over his own tail. MC stares at him through the darkness, torn between chasing after him and putting more distance between the two of them.
“...You saw that.” He doesn’t reply. “...Come here, Belphie.”
And slowly, he does.
For the next few weeks, Belphegor never leaves MC’s side unless absolutely necessary, even if he falls asleep next to them. He refuses to acknowledge this unusual behaviour, reacting with increasing hostility to anyone who mentions it. He also accompanies them to bed more often than not, much to Mammon’s chagrin.
“So long as I’m with you, no one else is going to talk to you like that ever again. I’m not going to let them, and I’m not going to let you just take it.”
#obey me: swd#obey me#obey me headcanons#obey me: one master to rule them all#obey me: shall we date#lucifer#mammon#leviathan#satan#asmodeus#beelzebub#belphegor#headcanon#mine#long post#my writing
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Show Pony
Chapter 5
Kids
Read on ao3
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“Oh fuck. Oh fuck. She’s going to Morocco.”
There was something in Steve’s throat, making his voice waver and sound reverent at the same time.
“She’s going to Morocco.” Billy pressed his hand down Steve’s back, dragging his fingertips along his skin, surprisingly smooth and soft.
Steve had his head on Billy’s chest, their bodies stuck together uncomfortably with sweat, but neither of them could be assed to move.
They were wrapping up their little movie night, Almost Famous playing to a close on Steve’s laptop, perched on the kitchenette counter, just where they could see it from the bed.
“Okay, that was really good.”
“I fucking told you. My mom showed me that movie when I was, like, eight. Shit changed me fundamentally.”
Steve shifted his leg a little bit but stayed silent. Billy could feel his muscles tensing uncomfortably.
“What?”
“What what?”
“I can tell you’re tense.”
“I just,” Steve sighed. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard you mention your mom before.”
“Yeah. Don’t really like talking ‘bout her.”
“Did she, you know ?”
Yeah. Billy did know.
“Nah, she didn’t die. She left. Not long after that movie night.”
Steve’s head popped up from where it was rested on Billy, giving him those big fuckin’ eyes looking sappy and sad as all hell.
“I’m sorry.”
Billy didn’t know what to say to that.
He doesn’t tell people about his mom. About her lovely life that she’s built without him in it.
It breaks his heart just to think about.
“She’s got kids now. A husband.”
“I don’t know what to say. I’m just. Sorry.”
“I don’t know what I want to hear. But yeah. T’sucks.”
“You wanna know something that makes me sad? So we’re even?”
Billy huffed a laugh through his nose, bringing his hand up to tuck some of Steve’s messy hair behind his ear.
“Only if you wanna tell me.”
“Remember how I said I was supposedta get my high school diploma soon? Well, by soon I mean, like, maybe within the next few years.” Steve wasn’t meeting Billy’s eyes, and he put his head back down on his solid chest, his shoulders tensing up around his ears. “I never went to school. Not even when I was little. I’ve had the same tutor on the road since I was a kid, and he’s good. Tries his best. I just. I’m- not good . I’m not smart. You need to pass this test to get your high school GED if you’ve taken an ‘ alternative route ’. Like I have. But I can’t take it until I know the shit that’s on it, and my tutor, Scott, he’s too nice. Says I’m okay. That I’m on track. But I saw the program he teaches from. Says it’s for ninth and tenth graders. I’m nearly nineteen, and I’m in fucking ninth grade .”
Oh fuck.
Oh fuck .
Billy’s 98.6% sure Steve is fighting back serious tears right now.
It was crushing Billy’s soul and making him feel like he was gonna join right on in.
But for how much Billy is a goddamn little crybaby, he sure is useless when other people start crying.
“It’s, Steve- that’s not your fault. You’ve literally never gone to school. Plus, like, I’m sure you don’t do your tutoring like I did school. Five days a week for like seven hours since I was five or something. You’ve been. Busy. You travel around and do all these amazing things, and, and, you're not dumb. Your parents just chose to not put you in school and then got mad when that didn’t work out as planned. It’s got nothin’ to do with your brain.”
This is gonna sound shitty.
And Billy really doesn’t mean it like that.
It’s just, well. Billy didn’t realize Steve was so. Fucked up.
Traumatized. Might be a less harsh word for it.
Billy just never woulda thought, when he first watched Steve ride like a fucking expert, or when he first noticed him strutting around the grounds of the rodeo, that there was actually something really sad behind that denim and flannel.
It made something in Billy’s gut twist and turn.
Because he’s the exact same way.
Because underneath the layer of carefully maintained hot muscle-head douchebag jock, there’s a really sensitive boy who was abandoned by his mother and gets regular hits from his father.
He can’t really decide if being able to see through Steve is a good thing or a bad thing, though.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to act like a fucking baby over it. I never really talk about it, so I guess the bad shit just kinda all decided to explode out all over you.”
“Nah, Pretty Boy. S’okay. I’m used to bad shit.”
“That sounds ominous.”
“I meant it more in a bummer way, I guess.”
“I am sorry about your mom. It seems like you really loved her.”
Little bastard had brought it back around to Billy’s shitty baggage now.
The gorgeous little dickhead.
“I do.”
And that’s probably the worst thing about it.
All these years of feeling abandoned and forgotten. Of trying to make himself hate her, he still loves her so much.
He is her.
So much of himself modelled around the aspects of her he found most beautiful.
The things, try as he might, he can’t help but love.
Billy felt Steve take a large deep breath on top of him.
“Do you, like, talk to her much?”
“Nah. Should be getting a FaceBook message for my birthday next week. And then nothing ‘til Christmas. That’s how it goes with her.” She was literally the only reason Billy still kept his FaceBook account around.
Mostly because when he was feeling sorry for himself he’d go over to her profile and peruse the album labelled “Family ❤️” until he felt worse.
“I’m sorry.”
“Quit apologizin’. Not your fault she couldn’t handle it all.”
“Was she really young, or something?”
“Yeah. It was a case of too young and her own shitty father giving her enough issues to make her wanna marry the first asshole that told her she was pretty.” He’s never said all of this out loud.
But he couldn’t. Stop. Talking.
“Then when he turned out to be a bigger dick than she imagined, she split. Basically fell off the Earth for a few years. Served my dad divorce papers out of the blue one day. Now, she’s got a family that doesn’t suck, and barely spares any thought for the kid she left down south. Not that I blame her.”
He does, and he doesn’t.
It’s an odd situation.
He blames Neil for everything, when he’s thinking clearly.
He pushed his mother away with the same violence, the same painful rage he shows Billy.
But he also blames her.
She could’ve taken him before she scrammed. Could’ve fought for custody over him while she and his father met for Skype calls with their lawyers to settle the divorce.
Their split was easy, because she didn’t want anything.
Not their house, not their belongings.
Not their son.
“Wow. I thought my family was fucked up. Not to be rude, or anything.” Steve flushed, but he had the ghost of a smirk on his face.
“Every family is fucked up. Just in different ways.”
“I guess you’re right. I should probably get my head outta my ass and quit bein’ so selfish, then.”
Billy smiled fondly at Steve.
“You’re not selfish. Just don’t got a lot of outlets, I assume.”
Steve nodded, and Billy understood.
He doesn’t either.
The only person he even considers close enough to vent to, is Max. And even then, he doesn’t tell her all of it. Not nearly any of it.
She knows he’s gay only because she knows Neil’s a fucking homophobe. She knows he gets beat only because Neil does it in front of her. She knows his mom left only because sometimes Neil gets drunk and spits in Billy’s face that it’s all his fault she’s gone.
But she doesn’t know that Billy agrees with Neil on that last bit.
That maybe if he fought for her better-
Got in between her and Neil when he was goin’ in rough and hard on her down in the kitchen, instead of hiding under his bed with his hands pressed over his ears.
He’s got no one to work through all this shit with, and by the sounds of things, Steve hasn’t got anyone either.
And maybe that’s what they could be.
For each other.
Billy shook himself.
“You wanna start your movie?” He asked Steve, trying to redirect the evening back to their Favorite Movie Double Feature, and out of Billy’s Hopeless and Has Feelings territory.
Because time was ticking down.
And no matter how much Billy felt like Steve was the perfect compliment to his frayed and ragged soul.
Steve was leaving.
Steve was always leaving.
#yikes writes#show pony#rodeo au#steve harrington#billy hargrove#harringrove#i don't love this chapter but i haven't fixed it in the months its been sitting in my wip and i've written and LIKE the next three#so here it is mostly filler and exposition
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Tedious Joys
- Chapter 1/8 - Ao3 link -
By the time Lao Nie wrote to Lan Qiren under personal cover to ask for his assistance, they hadn’t spoken in nearly seven years.
Oh, they’d spoken – it was rather impossible to avoid speaking, acting sect leader to sect leader. They attended the same discussion conferences, and of course the Lan and Nie sects were close allies, insofar as the Great Sects were anything to each other; their alliance, martial and moral, tended to balance out the riches and clever tricks brought to bear by the Jin and Jiang sects, and of course the Wen sect was large and powerful enough that it didn’t need or want any allies that it couldn’t subject to its dominion. An alliance meant constant contact, checking in, and ideally would call for a good relationship between the leaders of the two sects, which they had once had.
They had once been very close, even.
Lan Qiren had idolized Lao Nie from a young age, admiring his fierceness and his passion for life, his ruthless logic and his practicality and his thoughtful sense of judgment, all the more admirable given that he was from a sect known for being a bunch of hotheads. When Lan Qiren’s older brother – older by nearly ten years, with a middle brother that had died before Lan Qiren’s birth and several miscarriages in between as his parents struggled to provide the sect with the requisite spare – had continuously tried to leave his irritating younger sibling at home when going on night-hunts, Lao Nie had cheerfully interjected himself more than once, volunteering that he would be happy to take him along, and at that point Lan Qiren’s brother, who admired the older man nearly as much as Lan Qiren did, would generally yield, even if he grumbled about it.
Unlike Qingheng-jun, who ought to have been more considerate for his own family, Lao Nie had never minded having to slow down the pace of his hunts in order to accommodate a sickly child, a pedantic one that needed to understand things thoroughly before he was comfortable trying something new. He had often allowed Qingheng-jun to rush ahead and win glory that ought in all fairness to have been his, something Lan Qiren only discovered when he reviewed his history in retrospect.
Lao Nie hadn’t minded how clumsy Lan Qiren was, or how picky he was, refusing to eat even common foods if the texture didn’t appeal to him; he had only laughed at his excessive formality, the harshness of his tone, his tendency to repeat himself or to become caught on little details. He’d indulged him, wasting copious amounts of his time listening to Lan Qiren talk enthusiastically about the Lan sect rules, which he’d fallen in love with at an early age and, when young, rarely missed the chance to bring into any given conversation no matter how irrelevant.
He’d always been very kind to him.
If you had asked Lan Qiren ten years ago, he would have confidently asserted that Lao Nie was one of his dearest friends.
And yet – it had been Lan Qiren, who was short on friends, and not Lao Nie, who had many, that had cut off their relationship. Lan Qiren hadn’t truly spoken to Lao Nie in seven years, limiting their conversations to the subject of sect business and keeping their meetings as short as could be allowed by etiquette, ignoring the way Lao Nie looked at him with sadness and regret in his eyes. Even when Lan Qiren’s anger had finally died down from a raging flame to a simmering anger he suspected would never leave him entirely, he had thought to himself that it was too late, that the fire had burnt everything out, that there were only ashes left behind.
And yet – on the seventh year, apparently apropos of nothing, Lao Nie wrote to him, requesting his presence.
As a friend, he wrote. Come as a friend, or not at all. I have no use for a sect leader.
Lan Qiren struggled with the request, which did not obey any of the unwritten rules he had forced himself to learn on top of the many that were written. He did not know if he was still enough of a friend to Lao Nie to answer such a request.
He did not know himself whether he would go until the moment that he went.
Lao Nie met him at the gateway to the Unclean Realm, relief written in every line of him.
“Thank you,” he said, and Lan Qiren shifted uncomfortably from side to side.
“I didn’t even do anything yet,” he said stiffly, instinctively reaching up to stroke his beard. It was a more acceptable social tic than others that he had been discouraged from employing; losing access to it, however temporarily, had been one of the reasons he had been so upset with Cangse Sanren when she’d shaved it off while he was asleep. She’d tracked him down later to apologize when she’d realized how badly he’d taken it, serious for perhaps the only time he’d known her, and they’d ended up as something almost like friends out of the whole debacle. He hadn’t heard from her in years, either, but that was no breach; it was only that she was busy with her husband and the little child she had once shoved into his arms with that deep, echoing laugh of hers. “Don’t thank me until I’ve determined if I can do anything for you, or will.”
Lao Nie nodded and showed him inside, leading him to his private chambers rather than the sect leader’s study. This suggested that the issue was private, although Lan Qiren supposed he’d already known that, based on the letter.
They sat in silence while Lao Nie personally served the tea, his brow still creased in concern, and Lan Qiren stared at him – too intently, as always – and wondered what private issue could have caused such an upset, and moreover what he could possibly need Lan Qiren for. Lao Nie was a private man, in the custom of his clan and sect; Lan Qiren didn’t know his birthdate or even his age, only the approximates, and many of the details of his life escaped him. It made it difficult to guess what the matter might be, if it were personal and not political.
Although…
“My condolences regarding your second wife,” he said, watching, and Lao Nie jerked his head in a tight nod, acknowledging the loss. Lao Nie’s first wife had been a mysterious figure, appearing and disappearing as suddenly as an unexpected burst of rain on a sunny day – the stories in Qinghe enthusiastically claimed she was a goddess that descended from the heavens to dally with moral race, who’d ended up marrying Lao Nie to legitimize the child he’d unexpectedly planted in her belly, only to be summoned back to the heavens on important duties, although of course it was commonly understood that she was more than likely just some powerful rogue cultivator who had decided after a short interval that being married was not for her. Lan Qiren had never met her, although he had had the fortune to meet Lao Nie’s second wife, who had been much more down-to-earth, an innkeeper’s daughter.
(Lan Qiren had rather liked her the few times they’d met. She was a little self-absorbed, in a harmless sort of way. She liked beautiful things and good food and talking about them, and was happy to carry on entire conversations while he responded only with nods and grunts; to his relief, she had never expected anything more from him. She was very beautiful herself, both delicate and seductive with her fox’s face and long and narrow eyes; some cruel people spread rumors that she was a demon or a yao in disguise, sent to wreak havoc through the seduction of men. She had never tried anything like that on Lan Qiren, unless her attempt at seduction consistent of sharing a plate of snacks and occupying him enough to prevent him from having to listen to the more boring parts of the social parts of certain discussion conference meetings. At any rate, he’d been truly saddened to hear that she had died.)
Still, Lao Nie had not yet begun to speak.
That meant that the problem was not in relation to that aspect of his life, which in all honesty was a relief. Lan Qiren could not imagine a world in which Lao Nie confided his marital problems in a prematurely old bachelor like him.
Perhaps…
“Your sons?” he asked, and this time Lao Nie flinched, so he’d guessed right. “Ah. The younger one?”
The younger one would be about A-Zhan’s age, surely, or even younger. Little more than a toddler, not yet quite old enough to be taken away from the mother – or nurse, in the case of Lao Nie’s second son – and they were so terribly fragile at that age…
“No,” Lao Nie said, and sighed, a long exhale. “Forgive me, it’s a difficult subject. A-Sang is fine. The issue is with A-Jue.”
Nie Mingjue would now be around eight or nine years old, Lan Qiren thought, or perhaps even older – it was so hard to tell with these secretive Nie, and he only knew enough to make the guess at all because of their former friendship. Most sects were only vaguely aware that there were heirs to the Nie sect, and had certainly never seen hide nor hair of Nie Mingjue, during discussion conferences or otherwise.
He’d been a toddler the last time Lan Qiren had seen him, young and energetic, running around anywhere, but he had something of his father’s kindness – he’d actually listened to Lan Qiren telling him about rules that didn’t apply to him, and even proudly repeated some of them back to his father, much to Lan Qiren’s embarrassment – without having yet grown into his father’s occasional callous ruthlessness.
Perhaps it made a certain amount of sense that Lao Nie would ask for help with his children. Since his life plans had been irrevocably altered, Lan Qiren had taken over teaching at the Cloud Recesses, and to his surprise, was apparently making something of a name for himself.
It hadn’t been intentional: he’d been desperate for something to do with himself that wasn’t just for the sect, so much of his time consumed by the business of sect leadership, and he’d always planned to become a teacher eventually, although he’d always assumed it would be much later in life. He’d volunteered to teach, only to look at the small handful of obedient, well-trained Lan sect disciples that he would be in charge of instructing and quickly realized that such ‘teaching’ wouldn’t occupy his time at all.
Accordingly, he had demanded that the sect elders allow him to accept disciples from other sects as well. The request was highly irregular, but strictly abided by all Lan sect rules on the subject – it was Lan Qiren putting together the proposal, after all – and the elders had granted it with surprisingly little debate. To this day, Lan Qiren wasn’t sure if it was pity for his circumstances or simply an assumption that no outside students would bother attending, but he would not let the approval, once granted, be so easily retracted: he had sent out letters asking for students at once, and to everyone’s surprise but his own they actually came.
(He’d been clever about it, at the start. He’d reached out first to those smaller sects that would not have access to resources even a quarter as good as the Cloud Recesses, asking specifically for those children that seemed troublesome – the ones it took time and attention to teach, the ones who didn’t seem to be getting what they were supposed to learn. The slow, the stupid, the angry, the ones who disappointed their parents most of all. Lan Qiren might not have answers for those children, but at least he could give them his time and attention and he found, for most of them, that was all they wanted.)
Recently, though, they’d started getting more requests to join from the slightly larger subsidiary sects, more people, even murmurs about sending him their sect heirs rather than their burdens – people were saying that his teaching could make a gentleman even out of a waste, which Lan Qiren didn’t really understand. After all, putting aside a few students that were too arrogant to be willing to learn anything, he hadn’t encountered a single one he’d characterize as a waste.
“How can I help A-Jue?” he asked, expecting Lao Nie to finally give in and explain.
But Lao Nie shook his head.
“There’s some background I need to tell you first,” he said. “Without which the problem won’t make much sense. You have one of the finest analytical minds I’ve ever met, Qiren, and a way of thinking that doesn’t match up to conventional wisdom – I’m hoping you can help me where expertise has failed.”
Lan Qiren frowned, embarrassed. “I can try,” he said, already mentally rearranging his plans to account for a longer stay. He disliked sudden changes and had planned out three possible lengths of time for his visit – one short, one medium, one long – so that he would be able to select whichever one would be most appropriate. He hoped that the issue would not require any more time than the longest period he had allotted. “What is the subject?”
“Saber,” Lao Nie said, and smiled at Lan Qiren’s confusion. “My sect’s cultivation style. Let me explain…”
Lao Nie’s explanation was fascinating.
The cultivation style of the Nie sect – and the Nie clan in particular, especially the main branch – was unlike anything Lan Qiren had ever heard before, completely different in both substance and philosophy. It was a rough trade, a difficult road, heartbreaking in its sacrifice, impressive in its results…
It wasn’t the road for everybody, but one couldn’t help but admire those that walked it.
“Doesn’t it get close to demonic cultivation, using resentful energy like that?” he asked at one point, and Lao Nie had explained to him how they had drawn the distinction – using beasts, never humans, and channeling the worst of the effects into their sabers rather than themselves. How much they strived to cultivate morality into their sabers as well as power.
Lan Qiren thought that it was a fine line, but after some thought concluded that they fell on the right side of it, if just barely. The primary dangers of demonic cultivation were in the way it increased the amount of evil in the world, whether through the inevitable madness and violent rampages of its wielders or through the simple side effects of using other people’s corpses as your playthings, increasing their own resentment, breaking the hearts of their loved ones, and causing their ancestors to curse you; that sort of vile conduct was an offense to the Heavens. The Nie sect’s cultivation avoided that, and if through their sabers they added a little bit of evil to the world then it could not be denied that they took much, much more of it out.
“I think I understand now,” he said, brushing his fingers along his beard. “But…why tell me? Isn’t it one of your clan secrets?”
“It is,” Lao Nie agreed. “As a general principle, we do not tell outsiders unless we must.”
The Nie sect preferred principles over rules, which Lan Qiren begrudgingly accepted even if he himself preferred having rules, clear and precise and equal even if they sometimes weren’t quite fair. But situation-dependent or not, the Nie held to those principles just as tightly as any Lan did to their sect rules, and that was worthy of respect.
“So you felt that you must,” Lan Qiren observed. “But why? And what does it have to do with A-Jue? Is he not taking to your sect’s teachings…?”
“I would almost prefer that,” Lao Nie said, and rubbed his eyes. “We’ve always had those that didn’t follow our ways – those that refused to train the saber, or refused to cultivate a spirit despite all their training. No. It’s actually…A-Jue’s very good.”
Lan Qiren had been a teacher for seven years. He was accustomed to parents who needed to praise their child before getting to the point, though he wouldn’t have expected it of Lao Nie. He waited.
“He’s too good,” Lao Nie said, and abruptly covered his face with his hands. “He’s already cultivated a spirit in Baxia.”
Lan Qiren’s whole body jerked. “Lao Nie!” he exclaimed. “You’ve already given him a saber? He’s too young!”
Under the age of ten, Nie Mingjue should still be building his strength, shaping the muscles that would serve him in the future; he should be wielding only a practice saber made of wood, heavy and slow as he etched the forms of his sect style into his bones. Even if he was a true prodigy, a once-in-a-generation genius, he should at most bear a weapon of dulled steel, and never an actual spiritual weapon, much less the one that would be the companion of his future life.
“He took it himself,” Lao Nie said. “A little over a year ago – we had a surprise attack, right in the middle of the summer hunts. Supposedly bandits, but actually mercenaries, supported by traitors from the inside; they had a map to lead them straight inside our home, and attacked at the moment when most of us were gone. When everyone else ran for cover, A-Jue went to the armory and picked up a saber, freshly forged, and he took his first blood the same day. What was I supposed to do? Take it away from him?”
Lan Qiren felt a stab of sympathy for Lao Nie’s impossible dilemma.
Taking the saber away just when A-Jue had started bonding with it, right after he’d shed blood with it for the first time – yes, that would have been far worse. It might have crippled his confidence, introduced hesitation that would damage his cultivation forever, hinder his future growth…
“And he already developed a saber spirit?” he said instead. “Within a year?”
That wasn’t genius. That was insane.
“I know,” Lao Nie said. “The faster we cultivate, the sooner we die, but how am I supposed to say that to a child? And there’s how fast he’s picked up our cultivation style, how fast he’s going – what if he introduces some flaw into it and it sinks in before anyone notices? Even a minor disruption to his qi, at this age –”
Lan Qiren scowled. “Stop panicking,” he ordered. “That won’t help anyone at all, least of all him.”
Unexpectedly, Lao Nie smiled at him, although the smile was full of regret.
“It’s easy to say and hard to do,” he said. “Don’t you know I always lose my head when it comes to love?”
Lan Qiren knew.
Lao Nie had always been reckless in matters of the heart, as seen by his decision to marry some stranger for his first wife and a nobody for his second, and to thereafter refuse a third, more sensible arrangement with some sect leader’s daughter or sister that could care for the children as a mother while acting as a useful political tool, even if no other children were forthcoming. Even though his life had been beset with later tragedy, he had been happy with his wives – happy and in love, and unwilling to trade a single moment with them for anything.
Lan Qiren knew this. He even understood it.
He just had trouble excusing it.
Lao Nie had been friend to Lan Qiren’s brother long before he’d been friend to him, and so when Qingheng-jun had fallen in love in that sudden, shocking, irrevocable manner that the Lan sect had, Lao Nie had been the first to support him in it, delighted to think that his friend would find the same happiness he had himself found. He’d encouraged him not to be shy in presenting his courtship, in presenting himself as a possible match; he’d reassured him that some disinterest to begin with was reasonable, given that they were still strangers, and advised him to enjoy the feeling of falling in love, to be reckless and bold and daring with it…and he did it all in writing, from a distance.
Lao Nie had been occupied at the time with issues in his own sect – probably the scandals relating to his first wife, in retrospect, though of course he said nothing of it back then – and had unwisely trusted in Qingheng-jun’s description of the events, rather than seeing the circumstances for himself. It was understandable that he would not comprehend how fiercely his friend’s heart had been gripped by love, or how truly disinterested He Kexin was in her ardent suitor, not when Qingheng-jun described her resistance as mere coquetry. It was impossible for Lao Nie to have predicted that his well-meant advice that love was worth anything, even defiance of sect rules and the counsels of the elders, would be interpreted in such a terrible way.
Still less, of course, could he have predicted what happened next, the tragedy of He Kexin and the friend that deceived her, that tried to use her and Qingheng-jun through her through false rumors and twisted stories, and in so doing underestimated how unbridled He Kexin could be when pressed. It was all part and parcel of the same underlying calamity: if Qingheng-jun had not been so persistent in his courtship, He Kexin wouldn’t have had such a bad impression of the Lan sect; if she hadn’t had such a bad impression of the Lan sect, she might not have been so ready to believe her friend’s lies about their teacher’s conduct, to allow herself to be indirectly used to manipulate Qingheng-jun’s love-madness to the advantage of another sect; if He Kexin had been a little less arrogant or a little less blindly trusting or had bothered to ask a single question before taking upon herself the duty of executioner as well as judge, if she’d only held back her sword and not gone so far as to kill a man over baseless rumor – if only – if only – if, if, if –
If Qingheng-jun had not decided that his love mattered more to him than his sect.
There was no way Lao Nie could have known what would happen.
It was understandable.
One might even say that it was forgivable, except Lan Qiren had not yet gotten around to forgiving him.
Lan Qiren had dreamed of travel, not teaching; he’d wanted to play music in all the forgotten places, to learn all the things that could not be simply deduced from inside the safety of the Cloud Recesses. He’d wanted to help people, to use that vast store of knowledge that seemed irrevocably stuck in his brain to solve problems and suggest solutions. But the Lan sect needed a leader, and with Qingheng-jun in permanent seclusion, disinterested in sect matters, choosing instead to obsess endlessly over his broken heart…
The duty had fallen to Lan Qiren instead.
(He Kexin had eventually grown rather fond of her husband, even if love wasn’t the word for it. Lan Qiren didn’t know if she was simply salvaging what she could out of an unsalvageable situation or if she just enjoyed the exercise, but he had two nephews now, to raise as if they were his own. Because that was just what he needed, another chain binding him to his home, another duty that shouldn’t have been his – he loved his nephews more than anything, so he couldn’t be angry at them, couldn’t blame them for being born, and so he had to be angry at everyone else instead.)
Lan Qiren lowered his head and pursed his lips. He knew Lao Nie wanted his forgiveness. He even knew, according to the sect rules he valued so highly, that he should grant it. Seven years was surely long enough to pay for any innocent mistake, wasn’t it?
Come as a friend, or not at all.
That was the invitation Lao Nie had extended, and Lan Qiren had come. That was very nearly a decision, if he wanted it to be.
“Let me see him,” Lan Qiren proposed, and Lao Nie’s smile warmed at once.
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THE SUICIDE SQUAD (2021) | starter pack
(as always, these are meant for inspiration and can be tweaked to better suit your muses)
"Hey guys. Sorry I'm late. Had to go number two."
"I got road rage. In a bank."
"Your name is letters?"
"All names are letters, dickhead."
"I love your accent."
"Is this thing a dog?"
"He's harmless. I mean, he's not harmless. He's killed twenty-seven children. But, you know, we got him to--I think he's agreed to this."
"Next time you want to nick something, you take a partner, and they can be your lookout."
"You're a terrible father."
"No, what's fucking embarrassing is having you as my father!"
"I always hit my targets dead center."
"Starfish is a slang term for butthole. Think there's any connection?"
"You're the leader. You're supposed to be decisive."
"And I've decided you should eat a bag of dicks. How's that?"
"You're being facetious. But if this whole beach was completely covered in dicks, and somebody said I had to eat every dick until the beach was clean for liberty, I would say no problemo."
"I don't believe he would do that. He has very kind eyes."
"Why the fuck are you in your underwear? Tighty-whities? Really?"
"I'm an assassin! Why would I share my liabilities!?"
"Why the fuck would I want a leaf!?"
"If I die because I gambled on love, it will be a worthy death."
"You are a little idiot."
"Nothing like a bloodbath to start the day."
"I cherish peace with all my heart. I don't care how many men, women, and children I need to kill to get it."
"I don't like to kill people, but if I pretend they're my mom, it's easy."
"Oh, wow, I'm a princess."
"I'm sorry. Recently I made a promise to myself that the next time I got boyfriend, I'd be on the lookout for red flags. And if I saw any, I would do the healthy thing, and I would murder him. And killing kids? Kind of a red flag."
"When your taste in men is as bad as mine, they don't just go away quietly. They slash your tires, and they kill your dogs, and tell you that the music you like ain't real music at all. And all the cruelty tears you apart after a while."
"That's the worst fake mustache I've ever seen."
"Yeah, there's no good in me."
"You know what I think? I think you have a serious case of daddy issues."
"I have no issues with how much I loved my father."
"You remind me of my daughter, the reason I'm here."
"As imperfect as my father was, he loved me. I wish I could give that to you."
"Don't worry, yeah? I'm going to get you out of here alive."
"Alright, who ate all the fucking empanadas?"
"I love the rain. It's like angels are splooging all over us."
"If god existed, wouldn't this be proof that he wasn't good at all?"
"Come on, man. This isn't personal."
"Holding a gun on me is pretty fucking personal."
"He was a really nice guy, and he sacrificed himself to help us. And now look at him. He's dead."
"She'll kill you, you know."
"Rats are the lowliest and most despised creatures of all, my love. If they have purpose, so do we all."
"Nom nom?"
"Really? That is what you're thinking about right now?"
"No, it's not nom nom."
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Hell Above- Chapter Seven
PAIRINGS: Hwang Hyunjin X Female Reader
WARNINGS: Series contains mature content, read at your own discretion. Mafia!AU, explicit language, suggestive language, graphic scene, violent scenes, mental health, panic attacks, family issues, mild abuse, angst, 18+.
WORD COUNT: 5.1K
Previous | Next
So Sick Of Playing, I Don’t Want To Do This Anymore
“A twin sister?”
You stood there, trembling. Your mind clouded with the idea that Yeji has Jeongin and that the possibilities of whether he was okay spiked your anxiety. You didn’t know what she was capable of and you didn’t know how far she would go.Everything happened so fast in your mind. One second you were happy. You woke up and left your home, kissing Hyunjin goodbye one to many times, before you headed to the company. Your headspace was clear. Now you feel sick, your heart is cold. You wondered how you were breathing because your chest felt tight. Jeongin’s smiling face was stained in your mind and you couldn’t paint over it with his fear. All that you knew was that Yeji has Jeongin.
Yeji has Jeongin.
“Don’t you think that would have been information for all of us to know?” Minho’s eyes were a darker shade of black, one that was filled with rage and frustration. He stared into you as your tried to not let the dagger of his words pierce into your fragile state. You should have told him. You shouldn’t have sent Jeongin out by himself. You had underestimated the potential harm that would be done. Your lips quivered as you tried to process everything and deliver a message back to Minho. But your gaze returned to the phone in your hand, fingers ready to redial Jeongin’s number again.
“I-“
“NO Y/N. YOU DIDN’T THINK., YOU NEVER THINK. YOU ACT. YOU DO WHAT YOU WANT ALL THE TIME AND LOOK WHERE WE ARE! OUR YOUNGEST IS MISSING BECAUSE OF YOU.” Minho screamed and the vibrations of his voice rang in your ears as he stepped closer to you. Instinctively you flinched back, turning your head away from him, which caused Minho to soften. Your eyes were brimming with hot tears and you blinked them away. Because of me. Jeongin’s gone because of me. You felt Minho’s presences retreat from you and you relaxed as you looked at the phone, fingers grazing over the dial button as the screen switched to process your request.
“Minho..” Seungmin softly pleaded, placing his hand on Minho’s shoulder pulling him back and Minho let out a huge sigh of frustration. You raised the phone up to your ear and looked up at Felix who stood to the side of you, watching the debacle between his elders.
“So what do we do now?” Seungmin asked. The ringing tone in your ear buzzed as you bit your lip, praying that the other line answers. Then immediately you heard the automated message come through as the line went dead. You redialed the number,
“Well, we know what we know. Yeji is ‘Y’ and she has Jeongin.”
“But we don’t know where Jeongin is. He could be anywhere in the city.” No answer. You hit the redial button again.
“Anywhere in the world.”
“Felix, maybe you can look at the last coordinated Jeongin was in, and we can start by looking at those places first.” No answer. You brought your thumb to your teeth, chewing in the nail and redialed the phone again. You knew there was hope because the phone rang once. You knew that someone saw you were calling and turned the phone off. Yeji was smart. Turning Jeongin’s phone turns off the possibility of locating him. But you were smart too. You knew Yeji was someone who played on ice, and you knew if you kept trying to call, she'd turn the phone on and you would be able to ping the reception. You just had to keep trying. You redialed the phone again, the sound drowning out the conversation between the boys,
What you didn’t notice was Minho looking at you. Watching you intensely as you redialed the phone over and over again.
“Yeah I can do that” Felix responded to Seungmin’s request.
“Y/N.” Minho darkly said as he watched you hit the radial again and raise the phone to your ear. You were standing there in silence, in fear. You needed one chance to get the phone to turn on.
“Y/N.” Minho’s voice grew louder as the other two boys took notice of you and you felt their stares shooting at you. You tried to ignore them as you pressed the redial again, the hairs on the back of your neck standing straight as you felt Minho’s presence come closer to you. Once Minho got close enough, you swiftly moved your hand to the back of your belt, where your gun rested in its holster and grabbed your weapon aiming it at Minho. As if on cue, Minho retrieved his weapon from his holster, aiming it back at you. The other two boys started to shout at you two, trying to calm the situation down.
“Yah Yah YAH.” Seungmin yelled.
“GUYS PUT THE GUNS DOWN.” Felix screamed at you two.
You held the gun sideways towards Minho as he held his at you, face on. Your demeanor proving that you didn’t care. You redialed the number again and raised the phone back to your ear, listening to the automated message again.
“Stop calling him, Y/N.” Minho gritted through his teeth as you ignored him and redialed.
“Y/N.” Felix whispered looking at you as you continued to redial Jeongin’s number, not listening to the boys.
“Y/N, I SAID STOP-” You fired your gun at the glass window of the office and watched it shatter behind Minho. Minho, bent down and tried to shield himself from your bullet, the loud ringing of the gun in his ears. Seungmin and Felix now both holding their weapons at you, as a form of training when a weapon goes off.
“Are you FUCKING CRAZY?!” Minho screamed at you as you continued to focus on your task.
“Y/N, stop calling him.” This time it was Felix who whispered to you. You looked up at his concerned face behind the gun he was aiming at you. You bit your lip.
“I can’t.” you whispered.
“He’s not going to answer.” Felix stepped closer to you slowly as you hit the redial button again. Your heart breaking as you heard the automated message.
“He will.”
“Y/N stop…” Minho stepped closer to you calmly and you turned to him, the gun still pointed.
“NO I WON'T. JEONGIN’S GONE BECAUSE OF ME. I-“
“THEY COULD TRACK YOUR CELL RECEPTION TO THIS PLACE AND TAKE ALL OF US. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?!” Minho cut you off with a dose of reality. The thought of all of your family perishing at the hands of you was enough to make you lower your weapon. You felt yourself begin to choke on the tears forming in the back of your eyes as you tried to blink them away.
“I need to know he’s alive.” You whispered, lowering your head. Minho grabbed your weapon and phone from your hands and you looked at him with helpless eyes. He turned your phone off and unloaded your gun as he put your phone in the back of his pocket and headed you your unloaded gun.
“You better hope he is.”
*******************************************************************************************
Jeongin’s head was pounding, almost like his brain was swelling and trying to break free from his skull. The smell of dust mixed with blood poked at his nose as he realized his eyes were shut. Groaning, he fluttered his eyes open to a dark underground space. In front of him stood to large men, and one woman, who was sitting on the table that was placed a few feet away. She was tilting her head, almost in admiration to the boy that stood across from her. Feet and hands locked in place, arms up hands hanging above by a chain and feet locked on the floor. The side of his face covered in his own blood, damage from the car accident. The woman hopped off the table and looked at Jeongin who was now fully aware of the scene he had entered in. Realizing that he was trapped by shaking his body he huffed as the woman laughed a bit at him.
“Well it’s good to know you’re awake and aware.” her words were thick and rolled of her tongue sickly.
“Yeji.” Jeongin spat.
“Oh good. I didn’t even have to introduce myself to you.” Yeji clapped her hands like a child. “I mean, I figured she would have told you.”
“She?”
“Your cousin…. Lee Y/N.” Jeongin’s eyebrows raised and he grew confused. “I understand that you two are very close”
“How did you-“
“Find out?” she finished for him. Yeji began walking around Jeongin slowly as he was trying to figure out how your identity was exposed and how Yeji knew.
“You’d be surprised to know that not every member in your family is fond of her.” Yeji said as she reached Jeongin’s ear and whispered slowly. “Loose Lips.”
“Who told you?” Jeongin gritted and flinched at her.
“That wouldn’t be as fun if I told you.” she stood back up and laughed as she walked back to the table. Jeongin noticed his belongings sitting on the table including many different types of silver medical tools. He could only imagine what kind of ideas were in Yeji’s head. What kind of torture he was going to have to endure. He knew that keeping quiet was the way he was trained. Die for your family it was an honor. But if he were to die, he would die for you. To protect you and your dream.
“I know her plan, Jeongin.” Yeji turned to him holding a knife in her hand. “I know everything”
Yeji walked over to Jeongin and he glared at her. Yeji cocked her head to the side, using the knife to trace soft patterns up the side of Jeongin’s clothed waist. “She’s married to Hyunjin. Her mission is to kill him right?”
Jeongin just stayed silent. Yeji’s small eyes looking at him and her face grow more serious. She leaned forward, using the knife to graze up Jeongin’s body and up his neck as he tensed She clicked her tongue.
“But… from what I gathered… she can’t kill him. Right, Jeongin? You know why too.”
She leaned her face incredibly close to Jeongin’s face and then brought the knife on Jeongin’s cheek. Jeongin felt the sharpness of the knife against his skin. Yeji was waiting for Jeongin to release information on you and she whispered.
“Why can’t she kill him?”
“We needed him alive” Jeongin looked at Yeji and she smirked. Standing up she turned and looked at one of the larger men, she nodded at him and he nodded back, walking up to Jeongin. Jeongin noticed a dark weapon in the man’s hand and before he had a moment to realize what it was, the man swung the weapon into Jeongin’s stomach, blowing the air out of him. The other man began assaulting Jeongin with the hard weapon against his back. Jeongin screamed and Yeji watched as the men beat the young boy. She say Jeongin’s muscles tense as he tired to withstand the pain and then one of her men used his fists to strike Jeongin ins the head. Once Yeji felt like he got the message, she raised her hand and the men stopped. Jeongin’s head held low and blood seeped from his mouth as she noticed that the attack he had just endured may have caused him to drift off. She turned around and grabbed the injection and walked up to Jeongin. She used the syringe with the needle and pierce it into Jeongin’s heart, injecting him with the liquid that was inside. Jeongin shot his head up and groaned in pain as Yeji looked at him removing the needle.
“I don’t like liars, Jeongin.” She walked back to the table as she heard Jeongin desperate cries fall from his lips. She turned back around, “There’s adrenaline flowing in your blood stream right now. Which means I can torture you as long as I need to, and you’re gonna feel every bit of it. And I’ll keep going into that pretty little heart of yours...gives out.”
Yeji walked over to the younger boy and lifted his shirt to see the marks and bruises forming from his recent attack. She noticed that he was breathing faster, due to the injection and when she grazed over his ribs, Jeongin yelped in pain and she looked up at the boy. “Breaks my heart to see such a sweet boy like you get beat up for other people’s baggage.”
She paused and Jeongin looked at her. “I know she’s in love with Hyunjin. And I know she won’t kill him. She’s weak.”
Jeongin was trying to comprehend who told Yeji and who knew all the information that she knows. All at the same time he was overcome by pain from his ribs which he believed could be fractured and his arms that were growing numb from being held up for a long period of time. How could Yeji know that you were in love with Hyunjin? Who would have known that instead of Jeongin?
“It’s a shame too, she plays so smart but in the most crucial moments she lets her walls down and anyone can attack.” Jeongin hated how Yeji spoke of you. He hated that the way she tried to scrounge for a response was to belittle you.
“She won’t be played by you.” Jeongin breathed and Yeji laughed.
“See that’s where I feel like you’re wrong… she’s already playing the game I started for her. And soon it will be all over.” Jeongin looked at Yeji as she began to explain her purpose.
“See, because what I think is that by telling her that you’re alive, she will be fueled to try and find out where you are.”
Jeongin knew what Yeji was doing.
“Might lead her here..” Yeji walked over to Jeongin’s belongings and scanned over them. Grabbing his phone she turned to him and smiled.
“Should we call back?”
Jeongin knew you must have been calling, he knew how worried you probably were and how dumb you would have to be to come her and save him. In this moment he wished that Minho was making sure that you had stayed put and not done things the way you wanted. YOur safety was more of a concern for Jeongin than his own.
“Tell me jeongin, if she’s not going to kill my brother, what does she plan to do?” Yeji emphasized the way she said her brother, as if she was annoyed that you hadn’t killed him. He wondered if that was Yeji’s plan, to also kill Hyunjin. He was processing all this information the way you would. If Yeji was after the throne of the Hwang family, it would make sense to kill Hyunjin, but if she knew that Hyunjin and you were in love, killing both of you could end a chance of unity. Jeongin looked at Yeji who groaned.
“Silence. Very well then. I obviously didn’t expect you to be cooperative for your first interrogation.” She began walking away behind Jeongin who was left with the two men.
“Don’t go easy on him. He may be young but I hear he’s a fighter.” she said behind before exiting the room, leaving Jeongin to endure the torture he was about to receive.
******************************************************************************************
‘Hey, so I’m not going to make it for dinner, I’m caught up at work. I’ll be home late love you.’ You hit send on the phone to Hyunjin as you laid your head down on your desk in agony. You were so frustrated and genuinely afraid. The night was getting later and later and you had no clue where Jeongin would be. You felt your heart quench at the thought of him being dead, but you knew Yeji wouldn’t kill off a member of your family, if it was you that she wanted. You knew that Yeji knew. She knew you were the leader, she had to. All the events leading to now, only confirm that she had all the information that she needed and she had to have known you’d send one of your men to trace her steps. It pissed you off. This whole time you thought you were ten steps ahead. You were way behind, she had the upper hand and now you were playing her game.
You heard the doors of cars closing outside and you shot up at the sound. The boys had left to go trace the areas Jeongin was in last. You stayed behind, ordered by Minho, to be safe. You ran to the door of your office and saw Seungmin walk in first in the main entrance.
“Did you find anything, did you find him?” You ran to him and grabbed a hold of his arms as Seungmin looked at you in sadness.
“Y/N...” he said and you shook your head. Minho and Felix followed behind entering the building as you started to walk out.
“Woah where are you going,” Minho stood in your way and you pushed him away from you.
“I’m going out there.” You sternly replied pushing your way into the cold dark night. Minho ran after you and left Felix and Seungmin in the building. You were walking towards a car before you saw Minho run in front of you placing his hands on your shoulders, stopping you in your tracks.
“It’s dark and cold.” He said softly and you looked at him in anger.
“So..”
“Y/N..” Minho’s breath could be seen in the night as you heard the desperation in his voice.
“I can’t let him be out” you shook your head, tears beginning to form.
“Y/N...” Minho said again, trying to get your attention.
“He’s alone and scared and--”
“Y/N!” Minho shook you gently to get you to look at him. Tears were dripping down your face as you were imagining a night without the safety of everyone knowing Jeongin was out there alone. Minho pulled you into his chest and wrapped his arms around you, hugging you. You cried on his shoulder as your arms hung to your sides, unable to process anything in your mind. Minho’s hand raised and stroked your head as he tried to shush you. You couldn’t think, but you knew that it had been years since Minho had embraced you like ths. Years since you've cried on his shoulder.
“Jeongin is a man. He has trained for this. She probably is interrogating him and receiving no information.”
“But-“
“Jeongin is strong. He will be fine. We will resume search in the morning. You need to get home. That’s the safest place for you.” Minho pulled back and you looked at him, begging him to not send you home but also knowing that he was right.
“Y/N please. You need to go home.” He said and you nodded to him.
*****
“It’s been a while since you and I have had time to hang out.”
Chan ad Hyunjin were sitting in Chan’s car, munching on some fast food burgers that Hyunjin was craving. You had been working late for a few days and missing dinner and today, he didn’t feel like cooking. So he called Chan to see if he was up for a quick trip to the drive thru. And also, because it had been a while since Chan and Hyunjin had hung out, and since the incident at the ball, Hyunjin was hoping that Chan and him could talk about you.
“Well someone as busy as you probably uses a lot of his free time doing other things.” Chan ate a fry as he suggested to Hyunjin who rolled his eyes laughing at the reference made. It had been a few days since Hyunjin and you had had some quality time together. You had been at work for three days and the only time Hyunjin saw you was at night when you’d come home and wake him up softly as you got in bed with him. He was missing you and was worried about you since you were working so much.
“How is she?” Chan asked, signaling that he wanted to talk about you.
“She’s good. Working late these past few days.” Hyunjin said, taking a bite of his burger and Chan nodded.
“Ah yes. Her accountant job.” Hyunjin looked over at Chan who’s tone of voice was off and Hyunjin chuckled.
“You say that like you don’t believe her..”
“Because I don't.” Chan’s bluntness caused Hyunjin to look at Chan, his heart dropping to his stomach as the disapproval of Hyunjin’s wife.
“You don’t like her.” Hyunjin stated and Chan looked at him and pursed his lips.
“I don’t trust her.” Hyunjin grew annoyed at Chan's response and feelings towards you and he sighed.
“Have you considered that maybe I trust her?” Hyunji asked Chan and Chan just sat back and shrugged.
“She told me that you two went to the same school. Why don’t I remember?” Chan asked and Hyunjin shook his head in confusion at the change of subject.
“She wasn’t a face to remember and you were older.” Hyunjin stated, and Chan nodded slowly, taking another bite from his sandwich before washing it down with soda.
“What makes her special to you?” Hyunjin looked up at Chan who had asked.
“What do you mean?”
“Why did you marry her, why didn’t you tell anyone. Why are you protecting her?” Chan’s had always been one to be worried about everyone, more protective of Hyunjin. Being similar to an older brother, Hyunjin knew that Chan’s intentions were good but they came across incorrectly.
“I never asked to be the heir.” Hyunjin softly said.
“Being heir is an honor.”
“To who?” Hyunjin looked at Chan and retorted quickly, Chan being taken aback at the response that Hyunjin had. “I've grown up and my life was decided for me. And everything I did was controlled. Everything. But then when I saw her, I just felt like this was something I could control. And I took a chance, and I saw her in secret, I kept her away like a second life. And we built a life, one that I wish was real. She makes everything okay. She doesn’t look at me for my money, my power, I can be myself.”
Hyunjin looked over at Chan who was staring at Hyunjin.
“I know that I’m going to have to tell her the truth, I just don’t know if I’m ready to lose her if I do.”
“All this for a woman.”
“Not just a woman, Chan. What we have is real and honest. I want to be with her every day of my life.”
“What if she isn’t who she says she is.” Hyunjin laughed at the question Chan asked and looked at him.
“You’re starting to sound like Yeji.”
“I assume she’s suspicious as well.” Chan said, grabbing his drink and taking a sip.
“Well she’s psychotic.” Hyunjin shoved some more fries in his mouth as Chan sighed.
“Hyunjin. I have always had your best intention at heart.” Chan started.
“If that’s true, then you’d give me your blessing.” Hyunjin looked over and Chan looked back and relaxed his shoulders at the request.
“Give me time.”
*******************************************************************************************
You sat at your desk twirling in the chair back and forth, chewing on your thumb nail. It was almost six o’clock and your eyes felt shot. Your skin was dry, your hair was brittle. It had been 5 days. Five whole days since you heard Jeongin’s laughter, or seen his smile. Five days since you have been able to sleep, eat, and live. You were falling deeper into a hole and you were trying to climb out but you couldn’t see the light yet. You were so lost in your own head that you didn’t even hear the door of your office open. All you saw was the figure of Felix, holding a tray of food and placing it on your desk.
“You need to eat.” he said sternly.
“I’m fine.”
“You’re not fine.” Felix almost whined to you and was going to say more before you cut him off.
“Did you find anything?” you kept twirling in your chair, not even looking at the boy.
“No..”
“Then leave me alone.” You swatted your hand away, signaling Felix to leave. Felix sighed as he turned to walk out your office and you returned back into your mind.
“Jeongin like this”
You aimed for the bottles that were set on the logs in front of you, aiming your gun and firing at the bottle that shattered on contact. You turned to Jeongin and he lifted his gun and aimed it. You thought it was funny to watch a young kid hold a gun the way he did. Only thirteen years old, and he was building his aim under your training. You watched as he closed one of his eyes to find a better aim and pulled the trigger, shooting the glass. You smiled brightly in accomplishment and he turned to you in excitement.
“There you go! See I told you, you can do it!” You gave him a high five before you returned to aiming at another glass bottle, shooting it with no effort and Jeongin watching in amazement.
“How did you never miss a shot?” he asked and you looked at him and laughed a bit.
“I imagine it being Minho’s head.” You cocked your brow and laughed as Jeongin laughed back at you.
“I’ll imagine it being grandpas.” he lifted his gun and aimed as your blood ran cold. You looked over to Jeongin, as he aimed his gun at the glass and fired his weapon, shooting the glass on sight, almost flawlessly. His words caught you off guard, you wondered if he had heard the nights of shouting and crying. He lowered his weapon and looked at you softly.
“I don’t like that he hurts you.” he said and you gulped. Jeongin was so young. Too young. He shouldn’t be exposed to things like this.
“I’ll never let anyone hurt you” He grabbed your hand and squeezed it softly and you frowned.
“Don’t make that promise to me.” you whispered.
“You’d do the same though. Protect me, protect you. That’s what Family does.” He grinned at you and you looked at him. You didn’t have much to be happy about in this life. You hated everything that came with being you and living under the name your father gave you. But if there was one thing that you could be happy about, it would be to protect Jeongin, even if you had to die, you knew Jeongin’s life was more important. He is just a kid, and soon he will sit at the head with all the members and take part in the mafia. And even then, you would give up your life for him
“I’ll always protect you.” you smiled.
“Guys we got something.” Seungmin ran to Felix and Minho in the conference room and the boys looked at him quickly as they followed Seungmin out of the room. Seungmin led the boys to the back and they saw a crushed up vehicle being lowered from a truck.
“Shit it’s Jeongin’s car.” Felix said.
“Fuck,” Minho cursed under his breath, “Wheres Y/N?”
“In her office.” Seungmin said and Minho nodded.
“Keep her in there. I don’t want her to see this.” Seungmin left as ordered to your office to make sure you didn’t come out.
“Hey guys I found some pictures.” a soldier hollered at Felix and Minho as he walked up to them with the photos. Felix grabbed the stack and widened his eyes just from the first photo.
“Oh my god Minho.” Felix gasped.
“There’s a message on the back of these.” the soldier stated and Minho’s blood went ice as he nodded and tenses up.
“Take these inside.” Minho ordered Felix and watched as Felix walked inside the building as Minho tried to take a deep breath as he stood to the soldier ,” Keep looking at the car for any clues”
“Fuck, she’s killing him.” Seungmin said as he flipped through the images Felix brought. Photo after photo of Jeongin bleeding. His body was crippling and was covered in marks and blood. Pieces of his skin were taken from his body, eyes were swollen, blood in his mouth that dried purple. It was highly intense. It was far too much for a boy to endure.
“He’s dying, she hasn’t fed him either, look at his body” Felix winced and Seungmin sighed
“God what are we going to do, how are we going to tell Y/N.” Felix said and Seungmin’s eyes widened.
“Keep your voice down we don’t need Y/N to know.”
“Know what?”
Seungmin and Felix turned to see you standing behind them as they hid the photos and looked at you nervously.
“Y/N..” Seungmin stuttered.
“What don't you want me to know?” you stepped closer beginning to grow anxious and annoyed at the boys. Your eyes landed on the way they looked as if they were holding something behind their back.
“You found something.” You walked up to them.
“You can’t see it!” Felix grabbed you back and you began to hit him and push him.
“Let go of me!” You yelled, fighting back.
“Y/N no you’re not okay!” Felix yelled back and before he could do anything you pulled him to the floor and the pictures he held scattered on the floor as Seungmin tried to help Felix.
“Oh my god.” you paused as you saw the photos of your baby cousin, malnourished and broken. You picked up the photo closest to you and your hand trembled as your heart sunk. Skinned, burned, bruised. You felt the tears well in your eyes at the horror of what Yeji has done to him. Your lips quivered and your breath intake began to increase. You felt heavy, you felt hot.
“Jeongin..”
Your heart was pounding faster, you could hear the beating loud in your ears. You were choking on your own breath, tears were caught in your eyes, but you couldn’t function. You couldn’t make sense of reality. What was going on? You begin wheezing and you collapsed to the floor.
“Fuck Y/N!” Seungmin yelled as he ran to grab you from the floor, your eyes wide and looking everywhere and then back to Seungmin.
“Y/N breathe. Breath Y/N..” Seungmin said in the calmest tone he could.
“FELIX HELP ME!” Felix ran behind you and tried to help.
“What’s happening!?” Felix asked and Seungmin was trying to help you breathe.
“I think she’s having a panic attack. Get the paramedic team!” Seungmin yelled and Felix got up and ran towards the phone on the desk.
“GET UP TO THE MAIN FLOOR. Y/N NEEDS HELP NOW.”
A/N: I am so SORRY for posting late y’all thank you for still loving me. I hope I was able to deliver you enough content to last you to next week. Stay healthy, STAY HAPPY. Stay....STAY<3 -KMY
Taglist: @hyunfeji @zenzedana @datura-inoxia @minaamhh @ninjaleeknow @beethiin
#stray kids#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#straykids hyunjin#hyunjin#hyunjin x reader#hyunjin imagines#hyunjin smut#hyunjin fics#hwang hyunjin#lee minho#lee felix#seo changbin#bang chan#han jisung#hyunjin x y/n#kim Seungmin#yang jeongin#skz imagines#skz hyunjin#skz smut#skz fanfic#hell above series
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