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xveenusx · 4 months

Text

Wanted

Paring(s): JJ maybank x fem!reader

Summary: in a world where someone had everything, she still got treated like she was nothing. all she wanted was to be wanted.

Authors note: I wanted this piece piece to be as real as possible. It's not simple, its messy. We've all gone back to that one person we know we shouldn't just because being alone seemed worse. Also she gets absolutely railed so that helps. So please be kind to her lmfao.

Rating: smut, 18+, mdni, ANGST

Song rec: making the bed by olivia rodrigo

Part 1: Guilty

Bored.

I was so incredibly bored. I leaned against the built in bar as I watched Topper and Kelce take body shots off some tourists they invited. The loud bass of the music did little to tune out the annoying voice of Amy Culpo, who stood next to me, and rattled on about my mother’s latest line.

“I mean, it’s absolutely stunning.” I know it is. I was there when she designed it. “Any chance you have tickets to her next show?”

Ah, there it was. The brutal truth he reminded me of all those months ago. Every interaction was a strategic move to climbing the next prong on the social ladder. Everyone always wanted something.

I used to fight that notion. I thought I was better than them because I actually cared about other people. My wealth did not define me nor how I treated other people, but despite every effort I made both before and after him, I realized none of it mattered.

I couldn’t escape my wealth. It was permanently engraved into my body and no matter how hard I tried to scrub, it wouldn’t go away. I’ve now fully embraced that ugly truth and decided that I might as well use it to my advantage. I almost always had something that others wanted and I just had to figure out what they were willing to give. I didn’t need any more money, but there were things that were far more valuable. Favors, tickets to the hottest openings, plane rides. Since everyone already saw me as a spoiled little rich girl, I might as well play the part.

‘Depends. Are those last season MIU MIU?” I asked, tossing a look at the shoes on her feet.

“There from the season before-“ I pulled a face at her words. Before last season? I wouldn’t be caught dead wearing anything last season let alone the season before.

“Oh honey, if those are two seasons old, then I highly doubt you have anything I want.” The shocked look on her face dulled the aching pain that seemed to permanently reside in my chest.

“I can charter a plane-“

I raised my hand to silence her. “You don’t have your own?”

What was she even doing here?

This was a new little project of mine. I tossed away all those societal niceties that did little for me in the end. I still couldn’t get anyone to stay. This was much more fun. You’d be surprised by how much stuff you could get away with if you cut out all the bullshit.

Amy’s cheeks flushed red and maybe once I’d have felt bad or be disgusted by how I was treating her but I was numb. I realized nothing really mattered. Whether I was nice or rude, people all wanted the same things from me. At least this way, I could armor myself.

“There’s my pretty girl.” Warm hands curled around my waist, tugging me against a hard body.

I rolled my eyes. I wasn't his anything, Rafe knew that but he’s always had a flare for the dramatics. Tom Ford’s Noir de Noir filled my nose as I swatted at his hands, hands that I’ve grown quite familiar with.

“You left me.” I shot him a bratty look, one he met head on with a smile. Amy still stood there awkwardly, clearing her throat in an obvious attempt to gain my attention.

I turned around in Rafe’s arms, debating my next move. Almost immediately his chin came to rest on the top of my head while his arms curled around my front.

My eyes shot one last distasteful look at her outfit, before tossing out my arm in the opposite direction. “Shoo.”

She huffed before stomping away but not before shooting me one final glare. A look that would have made me cry before, but now it simply dinged off the impenetrable armor I’ve suited myself with.

“I was hoping it’d build character, but clearly that didn’t work.” I could hear the smile in his words as he pressed a kiss on the top of my head.

“The entire conversation was dull. She didn’t even have a jet, plus her shoes were two seasons ago.” I shuddered in disgust. Could never be me.

Rafe clutched his chest in mock disgust,”Not two seasons.”

I let out a huff, my chest going warm at the teasing glint in his eye.

There was no spark. There were no butterflies. Just familiarity and warmth. It was safe. We both knew what this was and expected nothing more. For now, we were just having fun. Despite the fact that I spent most nights at his place and rarely found myself without him.

I’ve found somewhat of a friend in Rafe. Someone to share the burden of being from a family like ours. He understood me. He enjoyed shiny things just as I did.

We spent a lot of our time going to the mainland because the idea of running into him still sent me to my knees. This was a small island. One that he was spending all his time running around with her instead of me. Rafe never said a word about it, never mentioned his sister or her pogue friends. And for that, maybe I do love him a little.

“You make fun of me now, but you’d still be wearing polo shirts and plaid shorts if it weren’t for me.” My hands smooth down the front of his linen light blue shirt, the first several buttons open paired with some black Gucci slacks and a black belt from Dolce & Gabbana. He no longer looked like a frat douche but a member of upper class society.

The same can’t be said about his friends.

“C’mon. Top and Kelce want us over there.” Rafe grasped my hand and tugged me in the direction of drunken yells. I pursed my lips but trudged behind him. The idea of being thrown up on was less than appealing, but being by myself was even less appealing.

“Hey guys.” Rafe nodded at them, taking a seat on the adjacent couch, a table with all sorts of drugs littered on it in between them.

The pair of them were obliterated, both their pupils blown wide and their speech slurred. That didn’t stop them from tossing me a sloppy grin and shouting a greeting.

The spot next to Rafe was vacant but on the other end was a couple gnawing each other's faces off that had me scrunching my nose up in disgust. He surely didn’t expect me to sit next to that?

He didn’t even bat an eye, instead Rafe patted his lap, tugging at my hand to sit down. “Wanna drink, baby?”

I nodded, deciding to once again indulge. It was better than feeling that stabbing pain that burned in my chest. It was a horrible solution but one that Rafe always supported, in fact he often took part in self-destructing with me. We were done with trying to be perfect for parents who couldn’t give less of a fuck.

A red solo cup with a familiar yellow concoction was waved in front of me. The pungent scent of tequila burned my nose and I shot him a secret smile. Rafe’s blue eyes narrowed in on me, glued on my smile before he shook his head in amusement.

“That’s the kinda night we’re going for?” He asked, his hand slowly gripping my thigh.

“Unless you don’t want to?” I sighed dramatically, pushing his dark blonde strands back from his face, something I knew he loved.

“If I ever say no to that question, feel free to shoot me.”

A giggle escaped my lips as I tapped my cup against his before bringing it to my lips, tilting my head back and zeroing it out.

The tequila left a burning trail down my stomach that I welcomed. It meant I was one step closer to not feeling anything at all.

“Another?” Rafe’s eyes pointed at my now empty cup and I nodded.

Being responsible was so overrated.

Lifting his hand up, almost immediately two younger boys, about 16, appear. Rafe pointed at me, muttering something before the pair nodded and took off.

I raised my eyebrow at him, confused.

He just shrugged, leaning forward to touch the golden pendant that hung from my neck. “I promised them tickets to the Charleston basketball game if they did whatever I said.”

“Why?”

“I was bored,” He hummed in response,”This is new, it’s pretty..”

I smiled back at him, the very picture of nonchalance, before replying,”Thank you. You bought it for me.”

His ocean eyes rested on me, the infatuation clear as day that had my stomach clenching. “Course I did. I have great taste.”

Rafe gave me his card about two months ago, not that I needed it, but he enjoyed taking care of me and I didnt mind. Plus, whenever he made me mad, I made sure to run the bill up, hoping for some type of reaction but it only left him amused.

Nerves gnawed at my stomach at the intense eye contact. Maybe the lines have blurred slightly. Clearing my throat to try and break the tension, I tossed my hair over my shoulder. “Want to see what else you bought me?”

“Enlighten me.”

I flashed him my freshly manicured nails, “What do you think?”

Rafe caught my hand, a half smile painted on his face, and kissed it. “Is that passion pink?”

“It’s actually bubblegum blush.”

“Beautiful, baby. I love it.” His words burned into my chest.

It was hard to describe. His approval had butterflies thrumming in my stomach. Maybe it was because we were stuck in similar situations, but his approval suddenly meant something to me. Being with him meant I wasn’t alone.

“You know we’re right here, right?” Topper's voice cut through the tension and I let out a laugh, relieved to look away.

“Fuck off.” Rafe laughed, regaining his composure as well.

Topper leaned forward holding out a black AMEX for me to take. My eyes paused on the card before shooting him a flat look.

“Are you kidding?”

Topper gave me a blank look, not a thought behind those eyes.

I rolled my eyes and stuck my nose up in mock outrage. “Rafe does it for me.”

The annoyed look on Topper’s face sent a thrill through my body. He was the easiest to rile up and Rafe knew it as he hid his chuckle with a quick cough.

The hand on my bare thigh slowly drew circles, the action almost unconscious, which had my brain blanking. It was a relief to not think. To not remember. To not feel.

“Are your hands broken?”

“No. I’m too pretty.” I shrugged, batting my lashes at him.

Topper openly scowled at me, his eyes dropping to where Rafe’s hands held me tightly. “What happened to the nice little girl who cried about everything?”

“Lay off.” Rafe snipped, leaning forward and snatching the AMEX out of his hand. His movements were quick and precise, with ease that only came with experience.

He separated the coke into three lines, one for me and two for him, just like always.

Bending over, I snorted the line quickly. Turning to hand Rafe the hundred dollar bill, his fingers dust off any remaining powder off my nose, before he bent over and did the same.

I leaned back into Rafe, the mixture of the tequila and the sting of the coke had me feeling sublime. It was a perfect balance. The alcohol got me warm and buzzed while the coke kept me awake and alert, an upper and a downer, a perfect description for every emotion in my body.

“I grew up.”

Topper hummed. “You certainly did.”

For the next hour, my mind never drifted to him. I enjoyed having thoughts that were my own, that didn’t revolve around him. Instead, my thoughts focused on the man below me. Rafe was always touching me. Even more so than usual, his hand never left my body once. If I let go of his hand to reach for my drink, he’s just moved it to my thigh. It was almost possessive which was odd, we didn’t do possessive.

Every couple moments, he’d pause in the middle of a conversation to press small kisses anywhere his lips could reach. It seemed performative, but I just couldn’t prove it.

“You’re thinking too hard.” His hot breath hot against the shell of my ear.

I said nothing for a moment before licking my lips and muttering,”Are you okay? You seem more clingy than usual?”

He just nodded, pulling me to his hard chest, his eyes darting to the side. “I just like having you with me.”

The sentiment was sweet and my heart tugged at his words. But, I couldn’t let go of the feeling that I was missing something. “I like having you with me too.” I allowed myself to give him a sliver of vulnerability, something I’ve avoided like plague, because it was true. He made living just a bit easier.

My head began to spin as I felt the lines of our odd friendship begin to blur. I knew neither of us would admit the sudden shift but it was there. I could tell with each lingering gaze and those secret touches. Maybe there was something here. I just had to give in.

“I’m glad you came to your senses,” He responded, but once again his eyes are not on mine but darting around me.

“What does that have to do with anything?” My voice comes out hushed, hoping it would get him to lower his voice.

My smile from his previous confession dimmed. Nerves slowly began to surface as I tried to read between the lines.

“You do belong with me, at least that's what you scream every night, isn’t that right baby?” He was boasting, loud enough to have his boys give him lame-ass high fives.

The small burst of happiness curdled like old milk in my stomach. I wasn’t a prude, not by a long shot, but I was a private person. Rafe knew this and he was still flaunting our private moments in a way that made me feel dirty.

“Stop talking about me like that.” I said, “What’s gotten into you?”

I felt Rafe go rigid under me. Frowning, I tilted my head back to make sure he was alright but his eyes were glued ahead.

“Rafe, I’m here for my stuff. Where did you say you put it again?”

My head turned and my stomach did a backflip. Sarah stood at the entrance of the room, looking immensely uncomfortable.

John B stood behind her, his big brown puppy-like eyes widened at the sight of me on Rafe’s lap. Or maybe it was because of the coke laid out in front of me?

But wherever he was, JJ wasn’t far behind. John B whispered something in Sarah’s ear, her eyes jumped to me for a split second before returning to his. She nodded and John B made a beeline for the other room.

I let out a choked laugh. I’m sure he was going to report back to his little lap dog. What were they even doing here in the first place? It’s not like Rafe knew-

My brain clicked into place. The constant need to touch me and the over the top PDA was because he was here. Rafe knew he was here and wanted to rub it in his face.

Rafe’s words were never for me. They were for him.

None of this was real. Not the endearing names, not the proclamations of affection. An ice bucket of realization poured over me and I felt like a fool. A fool for thinking that somebody else could want me, could maybe even love me.

Fuck this. Fuck both of them.

“You knew.” I accused, shoving his hands off of my body.

Rafe said nothing, but the flicker in his eyes gave him away. I wasn’t safe with him either. Embarrassment oozed into me, the feeling painstakingly familiar. We agreed to never make each other feel this way since our parents did it enough, but he did it to me.

Don’t think. Don’t feel.

Snatching the cup out of his hand, I forced it down, gulp by gulp, wincing at the burn. Straight tequila. “Babe-“

“Shut up.” I hissed, moving off his lap and shoving Topper to move over. Everyone always wanted something from me.

They never just wanted me.

Maybe I was defective. I had to be.

JJ didn’t love me when I was me. When I cared about other people and sacrificed pieces of my happiness for them.

Rafe didn’t love me now. When I was a spoiled brat who treated everyone like a transaction.

It didn’t matter if I was nice or a total raging bitch. Either way, I couldn't get anyone to love me.

I was just the stepping stone they used before they found the person they really wanted to be with. I was just there to make them feel good about themselves. For them to take and take just to toss me aside when they were done. Leaving me a shell of a person with no one, not even myself.

I guess, I was impossible to love.

“Line it up, Topper.”

“Can I at least get a please?”

“Be lucky that I’m even talking to you.”

Topper scoffed but did what I asked, lining up two lines of chalky white powder. “There you go, princess:”

A rolled hundred dollar bill was held out in front of me. Plucking it out of his fingers. I bent over the table. Don’t think. Don’t feel.

Dragging the cylinder bill down the crystal snow powder I’ve grown to love, I inhaled deeply. The chemicals flowing through the nose. I could practically feel the coke dissolving into my bloodstream, my body vibrating in response.

Dropping the bill on the table, I tilt my head back, begging my brain to shut off. I closed my eyes and chose to focus on the beat of the music that had my heart thrumming in my chest.

Then it happened.

All the air in the room was sucked up. The hair behind my neck stood up and my body suddenly awakened in a way it hadn’t in months.

My body recognized him before my brain did. The moment I opened my eyes, his eyes clashed with mine.

JJ.

It was like seeing him for the first time, a memory I thought I would never get the chance to feel again.

Heavy set blonde brows framed his bright blue eyes beautifully, the strong cut jaw that was currently clenched, and his lips soft and pouty, tightly pressed in a flat line. This face, his beautiful face, wouldn’t be complete without some mark. A bruise, a soft purple and yellow hue, decorated his cheek bone. His bottom lip busted.

He was so beautiful.

My body reacted before my brain could follow. I stood up quickly, too quickly that the blood rushed to my head and the room seemed to spin.

God, he was beautiful. And I fucking hated him for it. He was supposed to be like me, a complete and total mess, but instead, he looked the same, even better actually.

That thought alone had me ready to jump off the balcony.

My movements were clumsy and I drunkenly stumbled while standing still, his eyes clocking that in seconds.

Despite the loud music, I noticed the silence coming from the couch.

My eyes jumped to Rafe. All the laughter around us died off and everyone was exchanging nervous looks. It didn’t take a genius to read the room and the situation I’ve somehow managed to put myself in.

Blue eyes flickered between the two of us. It cracked my chest open wide and opened the floodgates I’ve been trying so hard to keep closed.

The crushing inescapable weight of shame hit me first. I was plastered, obviously so, and high as a kite. The evidence of what I’d been doing displayed out in front of me like a flashing sign. And I was fucking the one guy he hated.

It was unreasonable, I know. He left me and even pushed me in the direction of the one guy he hated and yet, I was the one feeling bad. He hasn’t even opened his mouth yet and it’s been turned onto me. But love never makes sense. It made the most sane people lose every coherent thought, I was the prime example.

“You should probably go, bro.” Rafe said, his tone was anything but.

He moved from his spot on the couch and stopped beside me. Rafe shoved a hand in one pocket while the other reached for mine, but I folded my arms across my chest. Mostly because I was mad at him, but a part of me didn’t want JJ seeing that.

JJ didn’t spare him a second glance.

He had on a dark blue short sleeve button down shirt with black cargos and chunky black boots on his feet. A backwards red hat settled nicely on the blonde mass of wavy hair and his shark necklace hanging against the exposed part of his chest.

It was so JJ. All of it, right down to the colorful bracelets that littered his wrists.

A hand grasped my chin and tilted up. I held my breath. His fingers slid along my jaw and he rubbed his thumb over the skin. His eyes felt like lasers, honing in on every detail of my face.

I swallowed audibly. JJ leaned in closer, bringing his height down to mine. His thumb brushed a soft stroke below my nose while his lips brushed against my ear.

“You had a little something on your nose.”

JJ let go of my face, his expression hard. Then he brushed past me, leaving a gaping wound in his wake.

Tears burned behind my closed eyes. He didn’t need to say it because I already knew what he was thinking. Sure, JJ smoked some weed but he never touched any of the hard stuff, not wanting to pick up the same habits as his dad. Hard drugs were a hard limit for him and he found me snorting several lines of it.

I went and became the very thing he hated, just like he wanted. It didn’t feel as satisfying as I thought it would. Instead, I felt like I lost another piece of myself.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I said to Rafe, finally gathering the courage to open my eyes.

He shuffled beside me. “Him being here wasn’t going to change anything.”

We both knew that was a lie.

“It’s him, Rafe. It changes everything for me.”

Rafe scoffed and shook his head. “You’re really going to try and go back to that?”

“I’m not saying that-” I spluttered out, outraged as his voice continued to carry across the room.

“He didn’t want you.”

People around us began to whisper, their heads huddled together with their phones out. Wet hot tears threatened to fall as the control I took months to master began to unravel.

“Yeah, well you don’t either.”

“What the hell are you talking about? Before he got here, everything was perfect.”

“I’m not stupid. You think I didn’t notice what you were doing? That wasn’t for us, that was for him.”

“I didn't mean for you to think I was using you-“

I gripped his chin, and pulled his face down to my height, my eyes brimming with angry tears. “You don’t use me. I use you.” I shoved his face back, needing to collect my composure.

Everyone’s eyes were on us and I was desperate to save face. It was the only thing I had left.

“Get the fucking picture?”

“Crystal clear.” He responded through gritted teeth, his eyes hard.

“If you want a whore, go buy one.”

Rafe cleared his throat, his face iced over. “I thought that’s what I was already doing.”

I stood there for a moment, not understanding what I did to deserve to be treated like this by not one man but two. I felt like an idiot. Like the stupidest fucking person on this god forsaken planet.

Two hours ago, I thought that maybe Rafe had feelings for me and played with the idea of exploring that with him. And now, I was a gold digging whore.

I felt another piece of my heart break off, mourning the loss of the only friendship I really had.

Pressing my hair down with my hands, I look down to fix my dress, swallowing as I went, hoping to pull myself together and buy some time.

“I’m glad to hear how little you think of me.” I sent him a sad smile,” I guess I’m keeping up with everyone’s expectations.”

I stepped around him, heading to the direction of the bar, the adrenaline from all the excitement having effectively killed my buzz.

Staring at the bottles of liquor on the counter had me frowning, all being some bottom shelf brand I’ve never heard of. I moved around the bar to the cabinets behind it, looking for the good tequila. It was the least Rafe could do seeing as though he just blew up whatever the fuck we were doing.

Spotting the only tequila I drank, I grabbed the entire handle. Twisting the top off, I tossed it aside carelessly before taking a healthy swig. Then another. And another.

I stumbled into another room, shoving people out of my way. I ignored the angry shouts because I was way past the point of caring. I just-I just wanted to see him.

As if someone heard my thoughts, I spotted JJ leaning against a wall with a lit joint dangled between his fingers and a beer in the other.

He had so much charisma, it demanded the attention of the room. People gravitated towards him all the time but he refused to see himself that way.

Even now, he stood surrounded by several people, including a girl who was too close for my liking, and they were hanging onto every word. All of their bodies angled towards him, nodding along. The people around them curiously moving in to hear more of the story that had so many of them laughing.

It was almost ironic. It was the point I was trying to prove all those months ago. Kooks vs. Pouges was bullshit. Because, right now JJ is telling a story to a bunch of Kooks who were eating it right up. Neither parties cared about their status, they just wanted to socialize and have fun.

Why couldn’t he see that?

The organ in my chest began to flutter, the butterflies erupting in my stomach at his nearness. Panic began to set in. I thought I’d pushed it all down.

All it took was seeing him. Just once. For the last couple months of progress to be thrown out the window. I made sure to not feel anything anymore, because the alternative destroyed me. And yet, there he stood, looking like every dream I’ve ever had, and completely disarming my very being with one look.

I never wanted to feel that way again. My heart was open and my soul was bared, but I was naive. I thought love was supposed to be empowering. But really, it was poison. It slowly entered your bloodstream, coating every vein before slowly taking over every organ. It leaked into your brain and made you lose all common sense. The poison tricked you into thinking that certain treatment was okay because at least they were here. At least, they still wanted to be with you because they love you, right?

But eventually, like all things lacking an antidote, it began to cut off your oxygen. It curled around your lungs and squeezed until you gasped for breath with tears staining your face. It didn’t matter how much you screamed and shouted, nothing came out. The last organ it takes over is your heart. That silly little organ who was so trusting begins to pump faster, desperately trying to get that oxygen to your brain, because maybe then you’ll finally be able to think clearly. But in the end, it slows down. Each pump is slower than the last until finally it comes to a stop. The heart broke.

It’s the closest thing to dying I’ve ever experienced.

It was like drowning on dry land.

His words did not leave me dented, but destroyed.

I lost my sense of myself. I lost my identity. I put on a performance every time I left my house, wanting to see just how far I could get away with treating people the same way they treat me.

At first it didn’t feel good, but now I didn’t feel anything at all. Or so I thought until I saw him again. And I just want to see that he was doing okay and maybe, if I can admit it, to see if he still loved me, however little that may be.

I watched from my spot on the other side of the room as the crowd began to disperse, leaving JJ with some blonde. I vaguely recognized her from a shoot for one of my mom’s brands. I believe her parents worked in the fashion industry as well. Which would have been fine, had she not said something that had him give her one of those rare smiles, the ones he used to give me in private.

Nausea roiled in my stomach, maybe it was all the tequila or maybe it was seeing him smile at someone else when all I wanted was for him to smile at me.

She leaned into him, a coy smile played her lips, running her fingers down the shirt I bought him, which basically made it mine. And I hated when people touched my things.

The mix of tequila and coke emboldened me. I found my feet moving in their direction before I could stop myself.

“I wouldn't waste your time.” I could not get myself to stop talking.

“Why’s that?” The blonde’s eyes narrowed, her cheaply manicured hand resting on JJ’s bicep.

“JJ doesn’t go for kooks or so I’ve been told.”

“Maybe he just didn’t go for you.” Oh, how cute.

“Oh honey,” I sighed dramatically and took one step towards her, tilting my head to the side, dragging my eyes up her body, in obvious distaste. “Are you new here?”

“Well, yeah but-“ She tried to explain.

Clearly, she needed a run through on how the social ladder worked here. I was at the top and everyone else was at the bottom.

“Your mom works for some brand from Paris right?” I watched as her eyebrows pulled together in confusion.

“She does. We moved here because she’s doing a collab with-“

“With my mom.”

“So I suggest you take your hand off of him,” I smiled on cue, my tone dipped in sugar before batting my eyelashes at her innocently,” Unless you want her blacklisted?”

I could see her debating what to do. She didn’t know if I was bluffing but she'd learn rather quickly just how far I was willing to go.

“Hmm, cute shoes.” I hummed, “Chanel?”

She nodded, apprehension on her face.

“Won’t be able to buy those anymore if your mom doesn’t have a job.”

Her hand fell and satisfaction settled into my like molten lava. “You can go now.”

The blonde pursed her lips and stalked off, leaving me alone with JJ. “Trying a new type”

“And what type would that be?”

“Desperate.”

JJ tipped his mouth, saluting me before taking a sip of his drink. His eyes already glazed over from the joint in his hand.

“A thank you would be nice?” I muttered, taking another pull from my tequila. I couldn’t talk to him sober or I’d lose my nerve.

“A thank you?” He appeared almost amused, adjusting his red hat.

“Yeah, I just saved you.”

“I didn't realize I needed saving.”

“Self-preservation was never really your strong suit was it?”

JJ laughed, his eyes straying to the bottle cradled in my arms. “I could say the same thing, Princess.”

Fuck him for calling me that. So what, I’ve learned to indulge just a little. It made everything in my life a little more manageable.

“It’s called having fun, JJ.” Pouting as he snatched the bottle from arms just as I went to take another shot. “Since when did you become the responsible one?”

JJ leveled me with an unamused stare.

I huffed, blowing a stray strand of hair out of my face. “Tough crowd.”

JJ snorted, pushing the leaves of a nearby plant back before dumping the remaining tequila. My mouth dropped open as he wasted every last drop of my liquid courage.

How the hell was I going to talk to him now?

I pursed my lips, “That was mean.”

“I’m doing what your boyfriend should have done an hour ago.” His gaze fixed on my face, the intense stare causing my cheeks to turn red. God, would he stop staring at me?

“He doesn’t tell me what to do.”

“Then he shouldn’t have left you alone.” His tone laced with annoyance, “You have all these fuckers staring at you and you’re wasted.”

I tilted my head back to stare up at him, the annoyance I knew came from a place of panic. That was just how JJ was wired.

“So you’re in love with me?” Someone come arrest me, because I cannot keep my mouth closed.

JJ shook his head clearly fighting back a smile. “You’re so crazy.”

“What else could that mean?” I asked truthfully and I knew I had a love struck smile on my face. One that I’ve only given to one man in my life and he stood in front of me.

I just wanted to be near him. I wanted to hear his laugh and see him smile.

His face softened at my words. “Are you okay? Does he take care of you?”

“Of course, I’m okay. Why do you ask?”

“Only one of us is fucking loaded.”

I rolled my eyes and plucked the joint from his fingers. “Correct me if I’m wrong, and we both know I rarely am, are you not high too?”

“Not from cocaine.”

“Already back to judging so soon?” I mused, taking a hit off the joint, the familiar stinging sensation wrapped around my lungs and squeezed. “Careful, I might think you care.”

Kill me now. Thank god, he took away the tequila.

“Who said I ever stopped?” My heart lurched in my throat.

I blew the smoke out slowly, my fogged up brain rushing to keep up with his words.

Someone stumbled in front of me, slamming into my shoulder sending me flying forward into JJ’s arms. Something cold and wet splattered onto me, the bitter liquid dripping down my legs.

“Are you blind?” I shouted, shoving another drunk party goer off me. Looked like a tourist.

She held her hands up in apology.

“I’m so sorry. Here, let me help.” To my absolute horror, this fucking tourist used a napkin and went to scrub the stain. Are these people animals? This was custom versace.

“Stop!” My cheeks flushed, from the weed or from my constant streak of bad luck. “Clearly, you’ve never owned anything worth keeping but this is Versace, you dick.”

I needed to go home before I burned this entire house down.

“Is that how you talk to people now?”

I let out a loud groan. “Oh fuck off, JJ.”

I shoved him away from me, before grabbing the skirt of my dress and heading into the nearest bathroom, which just so happened to be Rafe’s.

In reality, I just needed to get away from him. I needed my hands to be busy so that I couldn't grab his face and kiss him. Because I really wanted to do that.

The sound of footsteps have my eyes widening in panic as I take in my ruined dress. All because of that blonde asshole next to me, if he hadn’t showed up, I’d still have my tequila and my sanity.

“I wanted to talk.”

I made a noise at the back of my throat. That didn’t sound like JJ at all.

“Fine, whatever. Close the door.” I didn’t need a million other people to see me lose my shit. I was already at my quota for the day.

Jj stared at me with a confused look. “Close the door.” I nearly shout as the footsteps get closer but he moves just as quickly and slammed it shut, putting the lock in place.

“I just got this piece too.” I grumbled, huffing at the stained skirt. It was the Medusa 95’ Cut Out Mini dress in a stunning pastel pink. And now ruined with a beer stain from that horrible girl outside.

“I remember this one.” JJ spoke from behind me. Of course he did. He remembered everything I bought.

He always demanded fashion shows after all my shopping trips. He knew nothing about clothes but he always paid attention to me. He used to sit for hours while I prattled on and on about clothes.

“Unzip me?”

“I’m sorry?” He choked out, setting his beer down.

“I need to clean it before it stains. Unzip me.”

In hindsight, I was goading him. I wanted to see what he would do. I could tell he was already on edge since seeing me with Rafe. I wondered what a little push would do.

Neither of us moved for a beat. JJ puffed out a breath from his cheeks before he walked toward me slowly. I remained stock still, watching his every move in the mirror. “It’s not like you haven’t seen it all before.”

My heart fluttered at his nearness. Something I wanted since the minute he turned around and left. Home, I wanted my home back.

I jumped up at the feel of his warm breath against the back of my neck, goosebumps rising instantly. The tug of the zipper had me swallowing the lump in my throat. His other finger caressing every inch of skin, the zipper surrendered.

The sound of the zipper stopped but he never dropped his hand. Instead, I watched as JJ swallowed before lifting his head, those storming blue eyes connecting with mine in the mirror.

I stood on my Magda Butrym Appliquéd satin sandals and a flimsy pair of tiny panties.

“I feel like this is a test.” I watched his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed.

“Is it?” I mused, tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

“Yeah and I’m failing.”

The pads of his thumb brushed along my bottom lip, dragging it down slowly. My lips parted as a soft whimper escaped.

“You’re still so beautiful, it hurts.” He murmured, almost angry with the revelation.

Blistering hot satisfaction dripped over me.

JJ’s other hand grazed my bare back, the contact immediately chasing my back to arch. Sparks of sensitivity erupted from my skin as my body trembled with hot desire.

His hand moved higher, gripping onto my hair before wrapping the long strands around his hand, tugging my head back, demanding my attention.

He stared at me with heavy lids, eyes like ocean blue blades. My body began to heat up.

JJ’s eyes dropped back to my lips causing me to the lick them quickly. He backed me up against the Jack and Jill sink, my back resting against the cool granite counter.

I blinked slowly, making the decision for him, angling my head up and smashing my lips to his.

A groan ripped from his chest as he met my kiss with the same crippling desperation. His rough hands dropped from my face to my hips, his nails digging crescent shaped marks in the skin.

My legs began to slightly shake as his tongue finally brushed against mine. Oxygen was something neither of us needed as we fed off each other's energy.

His tongue licked and twirled around my own, another moan vibrating between us. JJ’s large hand trailed up skin, goosebumps appearing in its wake, before locking around my throat.

His grip was strong, not enough to cut off my oxygen but enough to garner my attention. He pulled me up to my tippy toes by my neck, my nipples brushing against the rough fabric of his shirt making me gasp at the contact. His mouth clashed with mine once more, his lips wrapped around my tongue, sucking gently before pulling back and biting out a curse.

My hands were desperate as they began to unbutton his shirt quickly, pushing the fabric off his shoulders. JJ whipped off the shirt just as my hands began reaching for his shorts, my fingers fumbling with the button.

The laugh he let out was devastating. His smile was purely lethal for my heart. “We got all the time in the world, princess.”

My stomach clenched at the nickname he gave me all those years ago. But, we didn’t. We both knew this moment would end the minute we came to our senses.

JJ unbuttoned his pants and dropped them in one smooth movement before pressing his warm body against mine once more.

“Up, baby.” My arms wrapped around his neck immediately, my nose grazing his. JJ gripped my thighs tight as he placed me on top of the counter.

He rested the palm of his hands on either side of me, enclosing my frame, daring me to move. JJ leaned down, his lips leaving phantom kisses along my collarbone, nipping as he went along. He stopped at the swell of my breasts, both hands encasing my heavy aching breasts before pressing them together.

He pressed scorching hot, open-mouthed kisses on every inch of exposed skin. His tongue pressing against my swollen nipples before closing around one and giving a strong suck. I was a mess beneath him, my chest heaving with heavy pants.

He nipped and tugged at the soft flesh of my breasts, leaving small purple love bites scattered on my chest. He pressed a kiss on each one, a pleased hum echoing within the bathroom.

JJ dropped to his knees slowly, each hand running down my bare legs. I wanted to see him.

I leaned back on the palm of my hands and arched my back in a teasing invitation. Pulling my legs from his grasp, I propped my feet up on the counter, but kept my knees bent, the tops touching.

The utter obsession that painted his face had me biting down on my lip hard enough to draw blood. “Please, Jayj.”

He stood stock still, similar to a statue. It looked like he almost stopped breathing as I slowly pushed my knees apart. I was drenched, I could feel myself soaking the skimpy fabric of my thong, my thighs glistening with the evidence of my arousal.

JJ’s eyes went black, locking in on my wet pussy before jumping back up to me. His hands found my thighs and roughly dug into the skin to keep my legs from closing.

He leaned forward, his index finger hooking the front of my thong before curling the fabric and tugging it up roughly between my lips. “Fuck.” I mewled, watching as he pressed his face between my legs and inhaled deeply.

I could feel my clit throbbing, needing to be touched. With one more tug, JJ slaps the side of my thigh, having me lift my hips up to take the last piece of fabric off my body. An insatiable grin formed on his face that went straight to my clit.

The first touch onto my lips had my hips shooting off the counter, his touch like electricity. He blew a breath against the aching skin, his hot mouth watering at the sight of me. Two fingers pushed apart my drenched folds, rubbing against the sensitive skin again and again, turning me into a mindless puddle.

He smirked at my trembling legs. “You okay, baby?”

“Fuck off.” I responded through gritted teeth, trying to gather myself.

He dipped forward, gathering saliva before slowly spitting it out, the stream of spit pattering against my spread lips. The sound was obscene.

“That’s not very nice.”

Tears of frustration began to build up as I discarded my hands into those loose blonde strands, knocking his hat off. “You love it.”

The grin he sent me was feral and I knew this was exactly what I needed. “I sure do, princess.”

He enclosed his mouth against my swollen clit and sucked roughly, a loud shout erupting from the depths of my chest. JJ parted my lips again, forcing his tongue inside and out, again and again, devouring every inch of my pussy.

My cunt clenched against his tongue making him moan loudly. My body was burning as he swirled his tongue along the bundle of nerves once more. Another cry left me as I tried to find something to grab onto. His tongue lapped up all the fluids that continued to come out and I found myself forgetting how to breathe.

I pushed his face deeper, grinding against his nose that continuously rubbed against my clit, my fingers tugging at his hair, needing a release. The knot in my lower stomach began to tighten as I whispered his name again and again like a prayer. The sound of my breathy pleas spur him on as he slipped two fingers in my pussy, meeting no resistance.

The squelching noises had me throwing my head back against the mirror which had begun to fog up. I clenched around his large fingers that rubbed against my sensitive walls wanting him to lose control.

JJ curled his fingers upward causing my knees to buckle and my mind go blank. I was close and he knew based on the tremors the shook my legs. I could barely hold myself up as everything went fuzzy.

A choked moan escaped my lips that curled into a ‘o’ as his mouth sucked that rigid spot of flesh while his fingers continued to hammer into me. The invisible band snapped and as a wave of pleasure washed over me. My body finally began to relax as I tried to catch my breath, my chest rising and falling dramatically.

I spared a glance at him. JJ’s eyes were low, eyes pitch black and glued to my face, and his cheeks flushed red. He looked pussy drunk.

“Looks like I have to clean you up.” He mumbled against the flesh of my thighs. My eyes rolled to the back of my head as his hot tongue began to catch all the arousal that dripped down my thighs. I was sensitive and tried to move back, but his hands locked around my thighs to keep them open. Shives forced their way up my spine as he lapped all my fluids up, humming as he went along, not leaving one bit of skin untouched. JJ pressed one last kiss before pulling back and licking his lips.

My heart hammered through my chest and vaguely though my haze of pleasure did I hear a murmur.

“Huh?” I felt him smile against my thigh, clearly finding my delirious state funny.

“Barry, man, have you seen her?” Rafe’s voice drifted under the door.

I froze at the sound of his voice, my eyes darting to JJ who just smirked from his spot between my legs.

“She’s right here, man.” JJ whispered, straightening up to press a kiss on the crown of my head. I shook my head at him, my eyes wide with a silent plea, but JJ disregarded it.

“She’s a little busy at the moment.”

I shook my head, pressing my palm against his mouth, his next words coming out muffled. He never knew when to shut up. The last thing I needed was Rafe finding us in his bathroom.

I kept my hand on JJ’s mouth until footsteps faded and we were alone once again.

JJ nipped at the palm of my hands, his tongue slipping out. My face screwed up as I let out a squeal, “Ew, Jayj.”

“Shouldn’t have tried to shut me up to protect your boyfriend’s feelings.” He said the words lightly, but I could hear the slight edge in his tone.

Pushing him off my softly, I hopped off the counter with shaky legs. “Since when do you care about Rafe’s feelings?”

I winced as I tried to take a step, my knees nearly knocking together from the aftershock. JJ always left me a shaking disheveled mess afterwards, but I felt lighter, because he was looking at me the way he used to.

And, I wanted that to last just a bit longer.

“I don’t care about his feelings-“ He scoffed, before pausing at the teasing smile on my lips. “You’re fucking with me.”

“Too easy.” I let out a shriek of laughter as JJ's arms wrapped around my waist, lifting me up in the air.

That was how I found myself sweaty, pressed against Rafe’s sheets, struggling to breathe. The violent sound of skin slapping echoing in the room, my raspy moans intertwining with his hot pants.

One of JJ’s hands gripped the back of my head, pinning me to the mattress, the other pushing down on my back, forming a deep arch, to pull his cock in deeper.

I couldn’t register anything he was muttering as he bottomed out since of me, my mind go blank. My walls spasmed against him with each rut of his hip, sucking him back in every time he pulled back.

I was soaked, my pussy dripping around him. The sopping wet noises spurring him on, his pace quickening with those deep purposeful strokes.

I couldn’t focus on anything but him. The smell; the feel of him. The way his cock continued to brush against my cervix made me borderline delicious.

“Fuck,” JJ shuddered, rolling his hips in and out of my pussy had me clamping around him once more, a tidal wave beginning to build up inside me.

I whimper left me, the coil in my stomach pulling tight as I searched for a release. The tip of his cock pressed into me repeatedly, forcing my legs to shake once more.

My hands searched for something to hold onto as I tried to anchor myself from being drowned in pleasure. “J. J, I-I cant-I’m gonna-“

I felt his pace begin to pick him, his cock twitching inside me as he continued his movements, grinding his hips against the globes of my ass, until there was no space between us.

It was like he was imprinting himself into my skin. Like he didn’t want me to forget him.

As if I could ever forget JJ Maybank.

My whines got louder, his words becoming more and more depraved. His large calloused hands ran all over my body like he was etching it to memory.

Quick and quiet gasps bled from my parted lips, as he hammered into me from behind, his hands lacing with mine against the sheets.

The coil in my stomach snapped, white flash blinding my vision, this orgasim more intense than the first. I could feel myself coating his hips and upper thighs, fluids dripping on the sheets.

I could hear JJ’s voice whine, he began to babble nonsense under his breath, with each languid thrust.

My heartbeat was in my ears as I pushed my hips back to match his thrusts, wanting him to finish despite all my sensitivity coming to head. His nails dug my hips, my cunt suffocating as he continued to grunt his cock into me.

“Fuck, Kiara.” His grunt echoed in the room.

Kiara?

I went numb. I couldn’t breathe-I couldn’t, I needed-

Bile coated my throat as whatever childish hope I had shriveled up in my chest. So I laid there, not knowing what to do, as JJ continued to pump in and out of me, but the soft intimacy we shared before dissipated.

Why did no one ever pick me? Why didn’t anyone want me?

I let my body go limp even though everything in me wanted to shove him off, but I just couldn’t get myself to move.

That was all it took for JJ to realize the slip of his tongue. JJ froze behind me as I shoved my face into my arms and choked on a gut wrenching sob.

“Fuck, I-hold on,” JJ’s panick was audible as he slowly pulled out of me. I cupped my mouth to try and muffle the scream I wanted to let out.

His blue eyes widened in horror at his mistake but it was too late. The words were already burned into my mind, replaying on a torturous loop.

JJ’s hand reached out for me, but I shrank back, scrambling to the headboard, desperate to put distance between us.

I curled into myself, pressing my back hard against the headboard, willing for myself to disappear.

“What did you just call me?” My chin wobbled. I tried to remind myself to breathe but with each inhale, my lungs were saturated with pain.

“I-That was an accident.” He stuttered, raking his hands through his hair roughly.

“Get out.”

“It just slipped out, I didn’t mean it.”

“Get the hell out, JJ.” I yelled, and pointed at the door with a shaky finger.

Like I said, his words never dented me, no they completely destroyed me. They cut me like a freshly honed razor blade.

And I was going to die of blood loss if I didn’t get him to leave this room. He had no problem leaving me then, why was he fighting it now?

Was he thinking about her the whole time he was inside me?

Thought after thought haunted me. Was he comparing our bodies? Was he comparing the sex?

Mortification had my stomach churning as I debated what to do next. My body was wound tight, on the verge of hyperventilating.

Did he love her? Did he love her like he used to love me? Did he fuck her the way he fucked me?

I hated him. Before him, none of these thoughts would have crossed my mind. I may have been alone but at least I liked who I was. I never would have questioned myself the way I am now. But after him, the only thing I hated more than him was myself.

“Was Kiara not available,” I murmured, “so you came to the one person you knew would say yes?”

JJ didn’t find my joke funny. The air was tense, as if we were trapped in a steamed up bathroom, making each breath harder than the last.

“Kie and I aren’t together.”

“JJ, you know where the door is. Use it.”

“I don’t want to leave.” He shook his head, his eyes flickering with something heavy.

“You had no problem doing it before.”

“That was-“ JJ squeezed his eyes shut, his fists clenching and unclenching at his sides. “I shouldn’t have done that.”

He shuffled closer to my body, but still wasn't touching me. I nibbled on my bottom lip and wiped the remaining tears from my cheeks hastily.

“I’m sorry.” He said, clearing his throat. “I am so so sorry.”

I lost my grip completely as those eyes perverted mine. His eyes were so blue, it was easy to get lost in them.

Words couldn’t find their way out of my mouth. With wary eyes, I watched as he stood up and disappeared in the bathroom before appearing again with his shirt.

JJ reached for me before pausing, his eyes asking a silent question. I nodded, forcing myself to loosen the grip I had on the sheets.

I let him put the shirt on me, its protection better than the flimsy sheet. JJ dropped his head on my chest, his tan arms wrapped around my waist, curling himself into me.

“I’m sorry.”

I was sorry too. I waited for months for him to be back in my arms, but he ruined every independent thought I had. I couldn’t stop the overthinking. I couldn’t stop the pain.

I was hurting too, but I was the one comforting him. I was always the one comforting him. What about me?

I laid on the soft sheets and stared up at the ceiling. Our heavy breathing echoing in an otherwise silent room. His heavy arm tossed over naked torso, his fingers softly tracing the curve. The whisper of his breath caressing the nape of my neck where his face was buried. The familiar tickle of his golden strands brushing against my nose, his coconut shampoo wafting my senses.

The JJ induced haze began to clear up and the ugliness began to set in.

A single tear escaped my eye, its trailing burning it’s way down the side of my face. I loved him. Even after he willingly abandoned me. After he humiliated me in front of everyone. After he called me her name.

I couldn’t cut him out. It didn’t matter what he did to me, the minute we’re within the same vicinity, my self preservation disappeared. Then I was left, treading water in the middle of a storm, with nothing but a life jacket.

I had no one to blame but myself in this situation. I knew how he spoke to me, how easily he left me, how embarrassed he was of me. But he just smiled and it was like everything melted away.

I so badly wanted to feel again, but not like this.

So all I can do is lay here. In this bed. With a boy who made me hate the kind person that I was.

I made my bed. I didn’t realize this was how I’d feel when I lied in it. I turned into someone I hated. And suddenly I was bone-tired, exhaustion suffocating my lungs. I had no idea who I was and I was tired of being someone I wasn’t.

“Where are my clothes?” I said. God, I needed to leave this room before Rafe found me.

“I wasn’t really focused on that part, babe.” JJ mumbled, burrowing himself deeper into my side.

My stomach lurched. I thought I’d feel different. I thought that maybe this would fix everything. That in some deluded way, we would get back together and everything else didn’t matter. Like he didn’t leave me standing at the party after stomping on my chest.

“I need them.” I mumbled. I choked down the need to throw up. The feel of our sweat coating my body and his soft breaths against my skin had me almost hyperventilating.

Home, he used to be home. But, I’ve never felt like more of a stranger than in his arms right now. This was no longer my home.

Kook pussy. Daddy issues.

I fucked up. Fuck, I fucked up.

This only made me feel worse. I was good enough to fuck, but not enough to stay.

“What are you in such a hurry for?” His fingers paused their persistent movement.

“I have to get back-“

“To who?” JJ snapped.

I moved to sit up, dragging the sheet with me as I avoided his gaze. “You know who.”

He didn’t need to know that Rafe and I basically ended. I just wanted him to hurt in the same way I did.

He let out a scoff. “You can’t be serious?”

“Dead serious.”

“This isn’t like you-“

“You left. You don’t know who I am anymore.”

“Clearly,” he chuckled under his breath, “But suddenly Rafe does?”

I shrugged. “He’s my friend.”

“I don’t give a fuck who he is-“

I tuned him out. I was too busy trying to get his actual voice out of my head.

Kiara. Not me. Kiara. Not me.

It had taken every bit of strength to not chase after him that day. To not call and text, begging for him to give me the time of day. And I know, I know I should be stronger. I know I should have said good riddance and moved on, but love was never simple.

When I saw him tonight, I thought that maybe it was fate. So all the waiting, all the practice of self control paid off because he came back. But, was this what was waiting for me?

“You slept with me,” I said, “ but you’re thinking about her?”

I didn’t want to know the answer, but I had to ask it. It was just one of a million questions I had since the day he walked away. Was there something I could have done differently?

I was wracking my brain to see where I had gone wrong, but maybe I just fell in love with the wrong person.

“From what I hear, you don’t care about anything these days. Why would you care about this?” I couldn’t detect any emotion in his words, just cold hard facts.

I really was out here exceeding everyone’s expectations of me.

But, he had to know that when it came to him, I always cared too much. That’s why his words caused another jagged piece of my heart to puncture my chest.

“Why would I care?” I whispered, shaking my head at him. “Are you listening to yourself?”

Had I deluded myself so much into thinking we experienced the same love in our relationship? How could he even question that. Everything I did was always for him.

“I care about you, that never changed.”

Something pained flickered through his gaze. “Care about me? Yet your fucking Rafe Cameron.”

“You’re mad about that?” I choked on a humorless laugh,”Let me jog your memory real quick since apparently you’ve got amnesia, you were the one that told me to be with him.”

“Well, I didn’t think you’d actually do that to me.”

I threw my arms up in the air, exasperated,”Then why say it at all? Wait, I forgot who I’m talking to. You’re the king of saying shit you don’t mean.”

“Saying shit and actually doing it are two different things.”

“Well, you did do it Jayj.” My lungs hitched.

His jaw tightened, tension seeping out of him in waves.

“You left. You did the one thing you promised you’d never do. You didn’t even look back as you did it.” I shouted, tears blurring my vision as my body continued to shake from adrenaline. “All because what? Rafe hurt your feelings? Because I have more money than you?”

I wanted to understand him. I thought I did once, but the more I thought about our breakup the more I saw it had nothing to do with me. And everything to do with him.

“Do me a favor and grow up. This is the real world. You’d swap places with any one of us in a second if you could.”

JJ narrowed his eyes. “I don’t want any part of your world. I thought I made that clear.”

“I’m aware. But I was there, remember? For every bonfire, for every boat ride with you and your friends. What was it you guys said again?” It rushed out of me, “to going full kook?”

He watched me stoically, his fingers tugging at his bracelets.

“I guess you’re the only one that can have the money in the relationship?” I raised my eyebrow at him, waiting for him to respond.

The beautiful blonde boy that seeped into my bloodstream and made me love him. But, ruined us in the process. He destroyed everything he touched.

He pressed the heel of his palms against his eyes,

“What happened?”

“You want to know what happened? You fucking happened.”

That familiar anger flared in his eyes and I knew exactly what he was going to do. What he always did to me, but this time, I wasn’t going to let him erase me. Not again.

“Let’s talk about who you turned into?” JJ spat vehemently. “What? Rafe buys you a nice purse and you’re suddenly snorting lines of coke?”

“It was actually a couple purses.”

JJ shot daggers at me. “So what? You’re proud of that?” No, I only wanted someone to care about me if I died.

“I’m only doing what you told me, I’m sorry you don’t like the person you turned me into.”

I didn’t like her much either. But, JJ never gave me more and I realized he would never give me more, no matter how much I pushed. No matter how hard I tried to get him to see that I was the one he should be with.

It pained me that it took all of this for me to realize that there were parts of JJ he would never let anyone have.

“Why are you still here?” I said quietly. “I’m not going to let you sit here and make me feel like shit for how I chose to cope with what you broke.”

I was done giving the men in my life power over me. I needed to stand on my own two feet even if that meant I had to do it alone.

“Feel like shit?” JJ nodded his head with mock outrage,” Princess, you just let me fuck you in your boyfriend’s bed. I think you feel like shit already.”

He was right, but I still recoiled back at the venom he spat at me. I sagged with exhaustion. He was just lashing out the way he always did.

“I didn’t know, JJ.” My voice cracked. “I-I didn’t know. I just did what I thought I was supposed to do.”

JJ’s head snapped up at the waver in my voice. His ocean eyes showed a clear battle, one I knew he’d lose. “S-Sometimes it just felt like I wasn’t good enough.”

His confession broke me. I knew the thoughts that ravaged his brain only because those same thoughts now drown in mine.

My fingers twisted the hem of the shirt that my body was swimming in, a nervous tic I never got rid of. “But I never said that to you, you listened to everyone but me. You were more than enough.”

A tortured look passed his face, like the obvious miscommunication had disrupted everything. “I thought I was being paraded around to prove a point.”

I roughly wiped the tears that kept falling, “It’s okay to not want to struggle for everything in your life, JJ. You were exhausted and I just wanted to help you.”

“I didn’t know. I-just didn’t know.” I continued to repeat. And I didn't. I had no experience with love. I wanted him to have the world since he was born with less than most people I knew, yet he deserved so much more.

“You let your friends help you, I don’t understand how I was any different.”

His blonde hair was sticking up in multiple directions, a clear sign of his obvious distress. "Because they’re my family."

Irremediable sorrow burrowed in my chest. "But, I was your family too."

I felt layers of grief his me in waves, quick and hard, one after the other as I came to terms with the fact that JJ never considered me any part of his family.

"You were the only family I ever had. I thought I was your family.” I sniffled, my ribs began to ache from the constant crying.

A loud crack had me jump back as Rafe bursted into the room, chest heaving from exertion. He paused, his eyes locking in on the messed up sheets before dragging over to me and scanning my disheveled appearance.

I thought we hit a milestone. JJ finally started talking and letting me know exactly what was going on in that brain of his. And maybe, that would be enough for me, for now. This all happened because JJ didn’t know how to communicate and I knew that wasn’t his fault, but at one point he needed to grow up.

I was willing to hold his hand while he did it. But I watched as JJ’s eyes clocked the necklace Rafe wore with my initials. His gaze narrowed at the purse in his hand and my car keys in the other.

The jealousy was evident in the way he rolled his shoulders back, his face granite. “Cute necklace.”

Rafe smirked, tilting his head to the side. “Thanks. It looks even better swinging in her face.”

JJ’s cool demeanor dropped, his blue eyes darkened into a brewing storm. “Enjoy my seconds, bro.” He clapped Rafe on the chest.

My heart popped in my chest at his words, another bandage would do little to fix the shards that once resembled a heart. And, I knew then, that JJ confirmed the conclusion I just came to myself.

“JJ?”

“What?”

“You were right. I do deserve better than you.”

Loving him cost me something much greater: myself.

I couldn’t continue to hide myself in any man that told me pretty words. I was no longer my own person, just a mere extension of them. One that they treated poorly and only took out when they were bored. I was always willing to do what they would never do for me.

I was just a girl, in love with an extraordinary boy who couldn’t see past all the things he was not.

I walked over to where Rafe was, forcing myself to remember his cruel words also. It was the only way I could get myself to walk out of here. My eyes lingered on the necklace for a second before I pulled my keys from his grasp and grabbed my purse.

I wore nothing but JJ’s shirt, but at the moment I couldn’t care less. I left my clothes in Rafe’s bathroom, deciding it was better to leave them then spend another second in either of their soul sucking presence. I could always buy another dress.

I couldn’t buy another me. Not if I kept letting these boys break me.

This time, I was the one that never looked back.

Side note: I WROTE THIS THREE TIMES so pls pls pls be nice to me. I tried to incorporate a lot of people's ideas. I know the OC is very wishy washy but she's so real for that.

TAG LIST: @maybankslover @theficshop @cantbecreative @plk-18

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lovebugism · 2 months

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Could you pleaseeee do more single dad!Eddie 🥺

✶ ┄ MAYDAY ! [ stand by me ]

summary: after totally embarrassing yourself at eddie's kid's birthday party, the metalhead single dad from the trailer park shows you his (perhaps equally embarrassing) favorite movie. (2.9k)

pairing: dad!eddie munson / f!reader

tags: eddie and maeve universe, strangers to lovers (eventually), slow burn, mutual pining, idiots in love, girl dad eddie munson™, fluff, ugly crying at movies

You never did crack open that bottle.

The one you accidentally brought to Eddie’s kid’s birthday party? Yeah, that one. The glass container sits unopened on the coffee table in front of you, casting amber reflections on the old wood beneath the lamplight. It’s just a silly conversation starter now. You’ve got no real reason to drink it, anyway.

There’s nothing more intoxicating than Eddie Munson’s presence.

Sunrays spill from your mouth when you tip your head back to laugh. You turn to look at the boy on the other end of the couch, and your warm cheek squishes against the cushion. “Stand By Me is not your favorite movie!” you argue, giggling softly with disbelief.

Eddie has no idea how big he’s smiling. He’s too busy staring at you to notice the beam on his face.

He shrugs his shoulders, now free from the confines of his leather jacket. He wears a faded Peanuts shirt now. A hand-me-down, you figure. “I mean… Land Before Time is a really close second,” he answers in a teasing lilt.

“Oh, yeah. Only the saddest movie ever made.”

“Maeve used to love it. And, like, not in a normal way— She used to make me play it for her until the tape spun out,” Eddie tells you, chuckling softly to himself. “It grew on me eventually, but… Then she grew out of it.”

You watch him get all forlorn at the thought. You meet his subtle pout with a scrunched nose. “Well, she’s only four, right? Surely, she hasn’t had time to grow out of much.”

Eddie scoffs and slouches further on the couch until his thighs spread. “You’d be surprised. Every time I think I— you know— start to understand her a little bit or whatever, she just… She changes, you know? Like, overnight.”

He doesn’t mean to get so suddenly sentimental about the whole thing. Especially not in front of a pretty girl he only met eight hours ago. He’ll blame it on the late night and the existential dread that always comes with birthdays. He conceals his brooding behind a dumb joke.

“I mean, just this morning, Maeve’s favorite animal was a Hefflelump… Now it’s a blobfish.”

You try to hold back your laughter. You fail. The sunshine-coated giggle sputters from your mouth despite your attempts to keep it hidden. Eddie only laughs because you are.

“I should’ve said turtle or something,” you humor with a roll of your eyes, tucking your knees to your chest. “Or, like, a badger. Maybe then I wouldn’t have gotten made fun of all day.”

“Those aren’t any less normal,” Eddie chuckles with a lopsided grin, dark chocolate eyes twinkling ‘cause he never really liked normal anyway.

You shrug. “Agree to disagree.”

“You wanna know something?” he blurts after a long beat of silent smiles. “When I tucked her in, she made me promise to take her to the aquarium tomorrow. Said she wanted to see ‘if the blobfish were just as gross in real life.’

You smile so wide your eyes squint at the edges. “Do they have blobfish at the aquarium?” you laugh.

Eddie shrugs. “Probably not. But she’ll get to pet a stingray or somethin’. Then she’ll forget all about it.”

“Sounds fun…” you murmur, picking at pills of cotton on the old couch with a suddenly anxious hand.

“Yeah. Parenting always is,” Eddie hums with a distant smile. “Even when it isn’t.”

“Should I— Should I, like, go?” you stammer.

The boy seems shocked by your question. His fluffy brows pinch as he hums. “Huh?”

You squirm, less than comfortable in your own skin. “Well, I mean, it’s… It’s getting kinda late and everything, and… If you guys are going into the city in the morning, I don’t wanna, like, keep you or whatever—”

Suddenly anxious, Eddie sits up a little straighter. “No! No, it’s okay. I don’t mind,” he responds, then quickly follows with wide eyes. “Unless— Unless you want to leave—”

“I don’t!” you answer, equally flustered.

Eddie forces an awkward chuckle. “I don’t want you to think I’m, like, keeping you hostage here or something—”

“I just don’t wanna overstay my welcome—”

“You couldn’t,” he insists.

You nod, and in a mousy voice, you reply, “Well, you couldn’t keep me hostage, so…”

Eddie grins. “Good.”

“Good,” you echo.

“So… Wanna watch a movie or something?” he offers with a fluttering heart and fidgeting hands.

He feels like a teenage boy all over again — only he never actually got the opportunity to ask a pretty girl out when he was a teenager. People weren’t exactly fighting to spend time with the local freak back then. Or now, really.

Except you.

“Whaddaya got?”

“Well, let’s see…” he says, grunting as he rises from the couch.

Eddie walks the short distance to the box television across the room — which Maeve has carefully decorated with a collection of sparkly stickers. He sorts through the VHS tapes stacked in less-than-organized piles with a ringed hand, realizing must’ve left all the good stuff at Wayne’s.

“Oh, you know… All the Maeve Munson favorites…” he singsongs with a sigh.

“Surprise me,” you call from the couch.

Eddie rises then, with two bulky VHSs clutched within ringed fingers. He holds them on either side of his face and grins between them. “Stand By Me or Land Before Time?”

“Stand By Me,” you answer with a firm nod. “Unless, you know, you wanna see me ugly cry.”

“That’s second date territory,” he quips with a wink, suddenly and very uncharacteristically cool. “Stand By Me it is.”

—————

You’re crying on a stranger’s couch about ninety minutes later.

The credits roll in static colors on the tiny television across from you. The low bass of a nostalgic song floats quietly through the living room — If the sky, that we look upon, should tumble and fall… Or the mountains, should crumble to the sea…

Eddie looks on with a sympathetic beam as you hide your teary face behind your palms. He can’t tell if you’re shaking from sobs or from laughter. Maybe a healthy mixture of both. “I thought you weren’t gonna cry!” he chuckles.

You peek at him through your fingers. Your eyes are glassy with tears and squinting at the edges with a smile. “I forgot how sad it was!” you sniffle, then laugh at yourself.

I won’t cry, I won’t cry… No, I won’t shed a tear…

“You’re crying, too!” you observe as the boy beside you wipes at his eyes with his fingertips. You reach over to shove him with a playful hand. “You big softy!”

Eddie scoffs and swipes his nose with the back of his wrist. “I’m not crying! I’m just… I had something in my eye.”

“Tears?” you tease with a scrunched nose.

He nods, and with a sheepish look in his eyes, he says, “Yeah…”

Your quiet laughter entwines, filling the dim living room with something sparkly and golden. The sound of violins swells in a similar way. Eddie’s eyes flutter shut as he begins singing the lyrics to himself, not really trying but sounding pretty anyway.

“Just as long, as you stand, stand by me…” he croons quietly. You beam and sing softly along with him, audibly less serious about the whole thing. “And darlin’! Darlin’! Stand by me… Oh, stand by me—”

Both of you quieten when a door squeaks about open down the hall. The distant screech is followed by the patter of tiny footsteps. Eddie huffs and sits up a little straighter. “Ah, shit…”

Your face floods with horror. “Was I too loud?” you whisper.

“No. It’s just midnight,” he answers, shaking his wild head. “She always wakes up at midnight. Like my personal little Gremlin.”

Maeve appears in the dark hallway then, drowning in one of her dad’s old t-shirts. Corroded Coffin, the front of it reads, in what seems to be hand-made lettering. The thing fits her like a gown.

Her curls sit in an untamed halo around her head from the intensity of her slumber. She rubs at her swollen eyes with chubby fists. Eddie can’t help but grin at the sight of her.

“Hey, Mayday,” he coos. “What happened? You can’t sleep?”

The girl shuffles to her father like it’s muscle memory to her. Still half-asleep, she grips his shirt with graceless fingers and climbs onto his lap with her eyes still shut. She cuddles into his torso, fitting perfectly there, while you sit frozen on the other side of the couch. Like maybe if you’re real still, she won’t notice you’re there.

“We gonna go see da blobfish now?” she wonders in tiny slurs against his chest.

Eddie’s cheek squishes against her head when he smiles. The expression gets lost in her wild chestnut locks. “Not yet, May. It’s too late— All the fishies are sleeping now. Like you should be.”

She shifts on his lap like she’s trying to get more comfortable there. Her cheek, indented with lines of sleep, rubs against his shirt when she turns to look up at him. “Need you to tuck me in,” she tells him, tiny chin bobbing against his chest.

Eddie juts back to see her better. “Again?” he humors with his brows raised behind his curly bangs.

“Mhmm,” she nods, slow and sleepy.

“Okay,” he hums, scoffing a tired chuckle. “I’ll tuck you in again, bug.”

You don’t mean to laugh. It just crawls up your throat and out of your mouth before you can stop it. You try to hide it behind your palm, but Maeve still notices.

Her fluffy brows scrunch together when she turns to you. She swipes at the hair sticking to her cheek with a fumbling hand to see you better. She doesn’t say anything, though. She just kinda blinks at you, with a brown-eyed, emotionless gaze.

You muster a wavering smile at the girl, lifting your hand in an unsure wave.

“Wanna go see the blobfish with us tomorrow?” Maeve blurts. Though, in her less than awake state, it sounds more like wanna go see da bobfish wiv us tommowow? It’s like you can feel your heart melting.

“The aquarium,” Eddie clarifies.

You squirm in your seat. “Oh, I… I can’t,” you sigh, then follow quickly when she pouts. “I wish I could! It sounds super fun, but I’m… I’m busy…”

You aren’t, really. ‘Cause tomorrow’s Saturday — the only thing you really have to do is try to wake up before noon. You just don’t know how else to turn her down.

“Maybe next time?” Eddie offers hopefully, mostly for Maeve’s sake.

You nod rapidly, just for Maeve. “Yeah. Next time. Definitely.”

“See? It’s okay,” Eddie lilts, squeezing gently at the girl’s sides until she’s smiling again. “We can have fun just you and me, right?”

Maeve pouts in response, a sort of snarled face that’s obviously playful.

Eddie laughs loud and boyishly in return. “Hey! Don’t make that face at me!” he exclaims, feigning offense. Maeve loses her poker face almost instantly as she giggles. “Go get in bed, you weirdo. I’ll tuck you in in a second.”

“And read me another book?” she presses hopefully.

He nods, knowing it’s a fight he’s bound to lose. “And read you another book.”

“Two of them?”

The girl holds her pointer and middle finger in front of her face. Eddie chuckles and guides the latter back down with a gentle hand. “One,” he corrects.

“Two.”

“One.”

“Two!”

A brief stare-off ensues, one in which you’ve got a front-row seat. Maeve’s dark chocolate gaze resembles her father’s — button-eyed and swimming with something honeyed and stubborn. She tilts her chin to her chest and glares unwavering at the man in front of her.

Eddie inevitably caves. He sighs so deeply his chest deflates. “Fine… Two. But only if you run real fast.”

Maeves slides down his denim-clad legs until her bare feet hit the carpet. She scurries down the hall without another word, quiet giggles fading with her footsteps. Eddie slumps against the couch with a small, contented sigh.

You realize you haven’t stopped smiling for several minutes now. “She’s really sweet,” you compliment to fill the silence.

Eddie scoffs a gentle laugh. “Yeah. When she wants to be.”

The quiet returns. You run out of things to say. The notion of the late-late night settles more heavily upon you. You swallow hard and fight for a way out that doesn’t make it sound like Eddie hasn’t just given you one of the best nights of your life.

“I think I’m gonna—”

“Well, I should—”

The boy starts speaking at the same time as you. You cut each other off without trying, then laugh quietly at yourselves.

“You first,” you tell him.

“I should go tuck Maeve in before she goes all Mayday mode and starts screaming at me,” Eddie says, only partly joking.

His sweet little Maeve is only Mayday when she’s throwing a too-passionate tantrum. Or when it’s past midnight, and she’s acting like a total gremlin. He doesn’t particularly want you to witness either. ‘Cause kids tend to be pretty gnarly sometimes — especially when you aren’t the one raising them.

“Yeah, I should probably start heading home, anyway,” you reply. “It’s late.”

Eddie rises with a small huff. You follow behind him towards the front door, both of you moving with slow and heavy strides — neither particularly wanting the other to go.

“Thanks for keeping me company,” he says beneath the sound of the screeching screen door. “And for helping Maeve have a good day and everything… Most people don’t really consider hanging out with a four-year-old and her dad a good time, so…”

“Well, most people are weirdos,” you scoff and slide past him through the doorway. “You and Maeve are, like, the coolest people in Hawkins.”

You stand ahead of him on the front steps of the trailer, glowing beneath the silver moon and the buzzing amber porchlight. Eddie lingers in the entryway and holds the door open with his shoulder, so he can hear Maeve when she inevitably starts shouting for him.

“Yeah, I don’t know about that,” he wavers with a scrunched nose. “Maeve’s pretty cool and all, but… She definitely didn’t get that from me.”

“Your favorite movies are Land Before Time and Stand By Me,” you deadpan with a flat face. A smile inevitably pulls at your lips when you look at him too long, pretty as he is. “You’re cool, Eddie. Whether you wanna be or not.”

“Agree to disagree,” he grins, totally sheepish as he shrugs off the compliment. “Thanks for hangin’ around. Again.”

He feels like he’s said that too many times now, but he’s too full of gratitude to stop. It’s been just him and Maeve for so long. And, yeah, sure, Steve and Robin come around when they can, but they’ve got their own lives outside of this one. It isn’t every day someone appears at his trailer with a bottle of booze and the wherewithal to acclimate to his chaotic life.

Eddie feels like he should never stop thanking you, really.

You shrug. “Thanks for keeping me around. Again.”

“See you soon?” he wonders with a hopeful glint in his dark eyes, made a much lighter amber in the moonlight.

You nod firmly once. “‘Course.”

And even though that’s as good a dismissal as any, you both linger in the doorway still. Like your feet are glued in place.

How are you supposed to walk away from him? The man with wild rockstar curls, rings on each finger, and a beaded bracelet with his daughter’s initial in the very center. The man who loves cartoons more than his toddler and cries with you at sad movies?

You figure you’ll spend forever chasing this foreign feeling he’s so effortlessly given you.

“Daddy!” Maeve shouts. Her high-pitched voice rings through the tiny trailer. It makes you wince a little. You didn’t think something so tiny could be so loud.

“And there’s Mayday…” Eddie lilts quietly, unflinching ‘cause he’s used to this by now.

“I’ll go,” you laugh, walking backward towards your car. “I’ll— I’ll see you around.”

“G’night,” he calls to you as he watches you go.

His chest stings when he realizes he never asked for your number. It feels much too awkward to do it now, and he’s only got a few minutes more before Maeve goes crazy on him. He should’ve asked you ages ago, really. But he didn’t. ‘Cause he’s an idiot.

You notice it, too, but you flash him a sheepish smile over your shoulder anyway. Even if you never hear from him again after you’re gone, you figure there’s always next year.

Maeve will be another year older. Steve will bring you along to her party if you beg. Eddie will be in desperate need of a pick-me-up, and you’ll bring a bottle of booze just to make him smile. The alcohol will go untouched, though, as the two of you get lost in conversation and Stand By Me.

Even if all this was only destined to happen once every year — even if it was only supposed to happen once and never again — you’ll spend the rest of your life grateful that it happened at all.

With a cold hand trembling with longing, you wrench your car door open. Though your heart’s heavy with a distant worry that you may never be back here again, you grin at him through the grief and the small distance between you.

“Good night, Eddie.”

#published by bug #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #stranger things x reader #eddie munson #stranger things #eddie munson imagine #stranger things imagine #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fic #stranger things fic #stranger things fanfic #stranger things fanfiction #st drabbles #eddie spaghetti drabble #eddie and maeve

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 16 days

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AITA for wanting to dress my toddler in "ugly clothes".

I (35m) and my wife (35f) have this ongoing argument.

For our now 3 -year old daughter, my wife and mother in law always buy the prettiest and fanciest clothes and again and again, I hear the cry "Nooooo, the pretty dress, you ruined the pretty dress, how are we EVER gonna get it clean again". And it's not just dressing her up for weddings and stuff, she is supposed to be pretty EVERY day.

In turn, I get yelled at when they catch me letting her play at the playground or in puddles or at the beach and I don't make sure she stays clean.

And sometimes I just snap and say, she is a TODDLER, all of her friends play in the dirt, I don't always want to tell her No. It's more important for her to have fun, and for me to not go insane, than for her to wear the pettiest dress of the playground.

My wife then says "easy for YOU to say, who's pretty presents get ruined, and/or who has to then hand-wash it all trying to save it? You clean her clothes then!! This is the deal buddy, YOUR job is to keep her as clean as you can, MY job is to dress her and save the clothes if you drop the ball, but YOU just want to let it all fall on me, don't you?!"

To which I stubbornly say, I have an even BETTER idea, instead of ANY of us doing that stupid dance every day, IF we bought her toddler clothes like all the other parents around us, we could just wash and dry it all normally, this is entirely self-imposed martyrdom for no reason. And worse, again, if you get your way, our kid cannot play how she wants to.

To which my wife laments "Well all the other kids look like potato sacks, why do you want our daughter to be UGLY just because YOU are too lazy to do your share hand-washing her clothes AND too careless to keep her clean in the first place. If you were parenting properly, you would help our daughter be pretty".

Some more context, perhaps - things staying clean and intact has always been very, very important for my wife, dirt genuinely gives her anxiety. On the other hand, she also adores beautiful things. She herself also only wears clothes that either need to be hand-washed or at least cannot go in the drier. She feels that this is also what's best for our daughter and will make her happiest (in the long run), and doesn't believe that a child will miss anything if they are taught to "play cleanly". She also grew up in a big city without mud or sand, whereas we now live in a rural area.

So, AITA, for saying I would rather buy our kid "normal" clothes and let her play in the dirt, then help my wife save the pretty dresses?

Currently we live in permanent tension - the clothes are a red line for my wife, playing (by my definition) is a red line for me, and thus the frequent clashes.

#aita #am i the asshole

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shotmrmiller · 4 months

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okay so !!!! so what if you’re a jealous and possessive pet? like your boy tells you it’s okay to play with the other boys and the other pets and even encourages you like sucking their cock or riding them or eating out one of the other pets but the image of him doing that with someone else’s pet just shatters you. if they’re in a different room that’s bad but being able to see it happen is even worse. you can see the smile they give and the sounds they make and you thought you were special to them but it doesn’t feel like that — how would the boys reconcile something like that?

like knowing the other boys and pets are sharing and playing and you feel bad, especially when they’re all together and everyone is playing but your boy is the only one who’s not and it tears you up because you want him to enjoy and have fun but the thought of him kissing someone else or fucking them, finishing inside them… you could cry.

(bonus angst where one of the boys goes and visits another pet and comes back smelling like them, maybe marked and obviously fucked, and you hadn’t necessarily talked about that yet and it just crushes you and you refuse to sleep in the same bed as them for…. well, for awhile.)

UGH. YOU. I LOVE ANGST.

im a whore for hurt/no comfort so ill try to help write something here cuz if it was me, they can kick rocks. but its not. So.

for the first part, oh man. It's a bottle-it-in situation, imo, because i feel this in my soul. The low grunts you worked so hard to wrestle out of them are easily tumbling out of their mouth now, because of your hard work. It's something so gut-wrenching because that face of ecstasy should only be for you? Then the insecurities kick in. What if they're prettier, what if they're tighter, what if they're simply in another league altogether? (this is me as a hit dog that is hollering)

he's never treated your playdates as a chance to essentially cheat without cheating, he honestly only wanted you to make friends—wanted to expand on the kink you live and breathe by. But regardless, that's how it feels. And this is where the shutdown begins. The silence, the lack of enthusiasm for wanting to put on your collar, the distancing, and when he says, "Does my pet want to play with me today?" you burst into tears. Ugly sobbing, loud wails.

He freezes, for a second, because never in the time you've been together has he ever heard you cry like this. It's agonizing and when he immediately throws himself at your feet, he tries to cup your face with his large hands when you jerk yourself away from his touch.

You've never rejected his touch.

His heart cracks with hairline fractures because this is his love, his future that's falling into pieces in front of him and you don't even want his comfort. He lowers his hands and fists at the fabric of his trousers to hold back from reaching out to you.

For the first time in a long time, his eyes well with tears, and he swallows thickly, trying to open up his throat a bit to be able to say something, anything.

His voice warbles as he says, "Baby, talk to me." He gives you plenty of time to respond, but you don't. Once the tears are exhausted and your body is worn out, you simply turn your head to the side, eyes away from him. The tears that had distorted his vision now fall, dripping onto the cold floor he's still kneeling on. You don't even want to look at him.

"Talk to me, baby, please." His forehead touches your knee. "Please." His tone is desperate as he begs. The sight of a man who's killed people with his bare hands, sniveling by your feet pulls at your own heartstrings. Sigh.

"Would you like to know where you erred?" He whips his head up to look at you, nodding like an idiot.

"Your mistake, was assuming I wanted to share and be shared." He opens his mouth to say something, but you're not here to listen to him. He's here to listen to you.

"No. You presumed I wanted to the same as the other pets, just because we share the same kink? I had to sit there and watch— listen to you fuck someone else, and I couldn't say anything because then I would've been the buzzkill."

You clench your jaw and look directly into his eyes. "Do you know what it's like? No. You don't. You forget that the boys are your friends, your brothers in arms. Not mine. I sat with acquaintances, at best, and had to stomach whatever the fuck that was."

"I no longer wish to—" but he panics here, adapts a crazy-eyed look and cuts you off.

"No, no, no. Please, god no. You're my everything, you, I—" he hiccups, and his shoulders start to shake once he wraps his arms around your waist, and lowers his head onto your knees again, and chokes out, "I am nothing without you. Please."

Having cried all your tears, your sadness fades into sharp, biting anger. "It didn't seem like it though. You were quick to pass me around like some harlot. You're just gonna give me to anyone you see? Hm? What about the neighbor that has been hitting on m—" and he jerks his head back up, eyes deadly, dark with hostility.

"I'd fucking kill him for even having the audacity to ask if he could touch you the way I do."

Scoffing, you say, "And that's how I felt. Fucking strangers touching what should be only mine, kissing what is only mine," your tone turns hushed, "what I thought was mine, anyway."

Holding his gaze, you purse your lips. "I need time to think. You broke my trust. I'm not sure how to move forward from here."

this is too long im sorry uh, so he gives you all the time in the world, all the space you need, for which you're grateful. He's not overbearing, never crowds you. never says anything out of line. He seems fully repentant, dotes on you like his only reason for existing is to keep you as happy as you can feel. He tells you he loves you every bloody day, even if you don't repeat it back. He says it firm, unwavering.

And that's the balm that allays the pain in your heart. But you love him, still, so so much. With a deep breath, you tell him that you're not going to leave him, that you love him still and that's why it hurt the way that it did. But he'll have a ton of groveling to do.

The shaky smile he gives is full of relief. He pulls you to him, in an embrace so tight that you can barely even breathe. And after, he holds your face so tenderly, as if you're made of porcelain, and asks for a kiss, one you agree to. It conveys everything he's been sayings all this time, that he loves you.

and months pass, intimacy slowly turns back to what it was, but with reverent kisses and worship spilling from his lips. Words so sweet, that you break down in tears mid-act because you feel something finally shift back into place. Ofc, he freaks because "Darling, oh god, what's happened" but you pull him in for a kiss, and just tell him that you love him so much. His smile is soft as he says it back.

Then you pull out the collar again, and he panics but you calm him. That you feel ready. You want to play with your owner, and your heart is in his hands, to please take care of it.

A couple of tears fall from his eyes as he clicks your collar back around your neck and swears to never hurt you this way again.

Playdates turn into him being the only one to touch you and vice versa. And he answers to no one when they ask why.

i had a good time im sorry its so long I JUST LOVE ANGST PLEASE.

I hope i gave you what you were looking for ❤

#call of duty #tf 141 x reader #141 pet play

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verstappen-cult · 5 months

Text

F1 GRID ★ MASTERLIST

╰► CONTENT:

[ BACK TO MAIN MASTERLIST ]

here you’ll find all of my works for: 16 - 4 - 81 - 33/1 - 23 - 47 - 3 - 2—in the form of scenarios/headcanons with the link to the respective work! masterlist constantly being updated.

THE BOYS TAKING CARE OF YOU WHEN YOU’RE SICK

lando probably gets sick while taking care of you, charles tries to cook without burning the whole kitchen down, oscar reads to you until you fall asleep, max goes crazy, alex and daniel get angry and mick wants to cry.

SPENDING CHRISTMAS WITH THE BOYS

lando goes up to santa at the mall, charles drives you around town and helps you decorate the tree, oscar and you wear ugly matching sweaters, max goes all out and might try making a gingerbread house, key word try. alex takes you to an ice rink only to bump into people, daniel and christmas in australia, mick and his pajama-photoshoot on christmas day.

ATTENDING THE ERAS TOUR WITH THE BOYS

lando wearing matching outfits with you, charles tries not to show how excited he is, oscar might like reputation a lot, max will buy the most expensive tickets, alex is definitely a swiftie thanks to you, daniel definitely cries during all too well and mick might do something during love story.

GETTING A NEW PET WITH THE BOYS

lando loves the cat more than you, charles and you adopting a little one after moving in, oscar surprising you, max and you definitely didn’t plan on adopting another cat, alex and the zoo you have at home, daniel almost crying and bringing home a guinea pig, mick and cuddling. with a dog.

JEALOUS BOYS

lando doesn’t want to know anything about the new guy you are seeing, charles is seconds away from killing your friend, oscar bottles everything up until you’re alone, max confesses something while drunk, alex doesn’t know he’s jealous, daniel ignores you and mick finds some courage.

THE BOYS DEFENDING YOU FROM ONLINE HATE

lando defends you during one of his streams, charles makes a statement about what your relationship means to him, oscar posts a controversial tweet, again. max replies to every hate comment he sees, alex is obsessed with you and he shows it, daniel just needs a song, a phone and his guitar, and mick writes some beautiful poetry.

GETTING CAUGHT MAKING OUT WITH THE BOYS

lando and you have a little bit of fun in his driver’s room, an innocent task turns heated between charles and you, being in oscar’s childhood bedroom makes you feel and do things, max can’t keep his hands off of you at the FIA gala, alex sneaks inside the changing room, daniel and you hide in the airplane bathroom, mick can’t get enough of you even at the club, you spend seven minutes in the closet with logan thanks to a dare and lance makes sure you’re alone in his parent’s house.

MAKEUP SHOPPING WITH THE BOYS

lando doesn’t really likes to go shopping but for you he’ll do anything, charles is always asking if you need anything when you go out shopping together, oscar will follow you anywhere, max would give you the world if he could, alex and you have a monthly date to go shopping, daniel likes spoiling you, mick knows your favorite brand, you don’t even have to ask him and logan doesn’t know anything but he’s willing to learn.

THE BOYS MEETING YOUR PARENTS

lando looks like he’s about to meet his death while charles is about to have a panic attack, oscar is a natural, max goes all out, alex doesn’t know what to do, daniel is your mom’s favorite, mick prepares with flashcards and logan is a mess.

#꒰꒰ 📁 ─ verstappen cult files ꒱꒱#f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 grid x reader #charles leclerc x reader #max verstappen x reader #charles leclerc fluff #charles leclerc imagine #alex albon x reader #lando norris x reader #max verstappen fluff #mick schumacher x reader #mick schumacher blurb #oscar piastri fanfic #daniel ricciardo x you #oscar piastri x reader #daniel ricciardo fluff

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enemui · 6 months

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⁉️What your favorite Genshin Impact character says about you🫵

🐰Amber: Your favorite Pokémon is Eevee and your favorite Sanrio character is My Melody.

🌹Lisa: You're not scared of smart women but you are scared of interesting women.

🛡️Noelle: You don't know shit and plan on keeping it that way.

🫧Barbara: You either sell or buy gamer girl bathwater.

🦇Fischl: You're quarter-delusional. Like, you are delusional, but sometimes you're aware that you are delusional.

☘️Bennett: You have a soft spot for miserable little creatures and you desperately need a bigger character trait than that.

🍖Razor: You love dogs, even if they're old, ugly little goblins.

🐱Diona: You love cats and hate alcohol. Those are two rare instances of you feeling strongly about anything.

🔮Mona: You were assigned financial irresponsibility at birth, and haven't managed to do anything to change your fate.

🗡️Rosaria: You think having a healthy biorhythm is overrated. You also look like a human cigarette.

🖌️Mika: You let your feelings of pity towards others control you.

🍀Klee: You're the fun parent. You probably own a spoiled pet.

🦴Sucrose: You actually love to talk, people just hate to listen.

🧪Albedo: You're gay and neurodivergent.

❄️Eula: You're weak to corporate tricks. You should really work on that.

🦚Kaeya: You're not known to have functional relationships and healthy coping mechanisms.

🦉Diluc: You think you could get an edgy boy to open up to you. You couldn't because the moment someone is even a little cold to you, you will cry.

🦁Jean: You always order the same thing from the menu. Not because it's your favorite, but because you're scared of trying anything new.

🍏Venti: If being horny and annoying was a sport, you'd be an Olympic athlete.

🐇Yaoyao: You can be sold anything with a cute mascot plastered on it.

🌶️Xiangling: You wonder how a lot of different things taste like and you need to be stopped.

🧊Chongyun: There's a great disparity between how you want to be perceived versus how you are actually perceived.

💦Xingqiu: You are knowingly annoying and don't plan to stop anytime soon.

🎸Xinyan: You're misunderstood, but you definitely don't make an effort to be anything else.

⚰️Hu Tao: Your self-proclaimed pranks have resulted in actual damages to people's mental and physical well-being.

🎼Yun Jin: You've projected onto your partner before to the point you lost the ability to identify their actual character.

🥥Qiqi: You aren't swayed by public opinions.

🐍Baizhu: Close the wikipedia tab with a list of terminal diseases, you're fine, just severely dramatic.

🏔️Shenhe: You've been in abusive relationships. Not sure if as the victim or perpetrator, but you were in them.

🎲Yelan: You'd be perfectly content as a housewife. Just do chores and read smut.

⚓️Beidou: You don't mind putting in the work to change things to be more to your liking.

💎Ningguang: You have no qualms sucking up to people for a bit of societal advantage.

🍤Keqing: You've entered relationships before, thinking you could change them. No, that absolutely did not go well for you.

⚖️Yanfei: It's not just your exes who suck, you have an entire toxic friend group.

🔔Ganyu: You have an elaborate power fantasy about quitting your job.

🫖Madame Ping: You're a classy lesbian.

⚙️Guizhong: You present your opinions as facts.

☁️Cloud Retainer: You've been in a situation when you've found your girlfriend's mom more attractive than your girlfriend.

🪽Xiao: You're non-binary and depressed.

🐉Zhongli: You need a man to kiss the back of your hand. Also you have a strained relationship with your father.

🍁Kaedehara Kazuha: You don't care about looks, only vibes. You're also addicted to adderall.

🍃Sayu: You are serious about the silly and silly about the serious. Sometimes it's funny, other times you deserve to be dropkicked into the sun.

🎁Kirara: You have a crippling addiction to adorable girls.

🦌Shikanoin Heizou: You are guilty of the "thinking with your dick/pussy". Don't try to deny it, you didn't even care until his birthday became a national holiday.

⚡️Kuki Shinobu: You have better things to do than a well-paying job, such as arson.

👹Arataki Itto: You are a size queen. You also think you're way more interesting than you actually are.

🎇Yoimiya: You've had a crush on the same person for the longest time and every time you think you're over them, they make a request of you and you jump on it like a dog.

👺Kujou Sara: You could probably use hormonal therapy.

🍡Thoma: You think appearances don't matter as long as he's nice. You're also a terrible judge of character, so all your exes are just overall shitty people.

🪭Kamisato Ayaka: You cannot survive without your established social circle. Were it not for the luxuries of civilization, you'd be dead in a ditch.

🧋Kamisato Ayato: You have no self-respect, if a slightly above average man tells you to do something, you'll do it.

🐕Gorou: You don't need a man, you need a dog.

🪸Sangonomiya Kokomi: You don't know how to dress well, but you really want a girlfriend who does.

🦊Yae Miko: You think as long as a woman is hot, she can do whatever the fuck she pleases.

🌸Raiden Ei: You've been in a relationship with an unmedicated mentally ill person and walked out of that experience having learned nothing.

🧞‍♀️Dori: The world would be better off without you.

🌻Tighnari: You have an attitude and you refuse to reign it in no matter how inappropriate for the situation it is.

🪴Collei: You either have no idea what you're doing or you should be in jail.

🪷Nilou: You live quite blissfully, but dealing with you isn't easy. This is called ignorance.

✨Layla: Your best exam results come from days when you showed up to class hungover and on 45 minutes of sleep.

📐Faruzan: Your family broke the generational curse, which somehow had a negative impact on your character.

🪻Candace: You are the mom friend, but only because you have to be. Like, you're a mess, but you're a lot less of a mess than your friends.

🌺Dehya: You can draw yourself symmetrical eyeliner.

🃏Cyno: You probably have a good moral compass, but you still aren't easy to get along with.

🦅Alhaitham: You're, like, severely delusional. You either think he's like you or that you could be on good terms with him. Both of those are clear signs of delusional behavior.

🕊️Kaveh: I hate to break it you, but buying stuffed animals can't substitute for going to therapy.

☂️Wanderer: Most of the time, you're really cute, but you can be absolutely terrifying if you so choose. You're also trans.

💉Dottore: You're fairly submissive but if someone makes you mad, you'll make sure they regret it.

🌱Nahida: You're addicted to winning arguments. You don't even need to be right, you just need to feel like you've won, even if you resort to the method of wearing a person down until they no longer want to continue debating with you.

🌂Navia: You have leadership skills specifically in the "do as I say, not as I do" department.

🐧Freminet: You're non-binary and have anxiety.

🎩Lynette: You're very patient but you'd rather not be.

🪄Lyney: You have a dark secret and the dark secret is that you're actually a Danganronpa girlie.

🍷Arlecchino: You're not a good person but you genuinely don't think it's that bad.

⚔️Clorinde: You have fallen prey to misinformation on numerous occasions before.

🩹Sigewinne: You'd sacrifice your liver to keep a person happy.

🐺Wriothesley: You can be appeased by an act of hot girl shit.

🌊Neuvillette: You need a man to kiss the back of your hand. Also you have a strained relationship with your mother.

💧Furina: You're delusional. Could be affectionate, could be derogatory, it varies from person to person.

🦟Paimon: You don't know shit but you have an opinion on everything.

🐋Tartaglia: Your exes all belong in jail. So does your current and next partner. You never fucking learn, do you?

💰Pantalone: You don't need a healthy relationship, you need a sugar daddy.

🖤Capitano: You are, amongst other things, a monsterfucker. You want to be destroyed, but, like, lovingly.

🎀Columbina: You are a mix of a pomeranian and a Biblically accurate angel.

🎭Pierro: You are fatherless on an Olympic level. You don't need a father, you need a daddy.

💫Lumine: You're a hot girl. You're either stupid or evil, but you're a hot girl. If you're not a girl, you are a red flag.

☄️Aether: You have a crippling crop top addiction and you have no idea what to do with your hair.

🌌Dainsleif: You date people before getting to know them, but don't understand why you don't get along with your partners.

#im joking so i hope its at least a bit funny #never done these before so #genshin impact #neuvillette #furina #zhongli #wriothesley #dottore #scaramouche #kuki shinobu #arataki itto #sangonomiya kokomi #baizhu #im not tagging everyone so hopefully this is sufficient

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demonpiratehuntress · 5 months

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dreams

OPLA!Zoro x F!Reader

summary - majority of your dreams seem to manifest in the real world somehow, so when you have one about your crush and your best friend...things get a little out of control.

warnings - heavy angst (im sorry), hurt to comfort

a/n: when i started writing for this fandom i PROMISED myself i would not make it all angst and no fun, but oh well :))))) idek where this idea came from, i need help

You woke up from a nap with the sickening urge to empty your stomach overboard. Nausea reared its ugly head, and before you could even try to tame the feeling, you were sprinting to the side of the ship to empty your stomach.

What exactly was the cause?

This would sound insanely ridiculous, and to you it really was, but you had a weird dream. And it didn't sit well with you. Most of the dreams you had often became a reality, albeit with slight changes. There were some that didn't, but almost all of them came true eventually or manifested in a similar way at some point.

And that's probably the reason you couldn't stop yourself from vomiting obscenely before your stunned - and confused - crew.

"(Name), are you okay?" Nami asked worriedly, coming over to you.

You flinched away from her, increasing her confusion, before turning and running off to the bathroom. She exchanged looks with the others who were out on deck - Usopp and Luffy - before shrugging it off and going back to mapping the ship's course.

The truth was, you had a completely unexpected yet maddening dream while napping, one that you prayed to any god who would listen would not come true. You had dreamed of Zoro - the man you had the biggest crush on - and Nami, which may seem an odd coupling and probably was but you couldn't control your dreams. Much like how you couldn't control how you felt about it, despite it only being a fictional idea your mind concocted.

You went straight to yours and Nami's room after cleaning yourself up, setting up the divider that separated your section from hers so you wouldn't have to deal with seeing her if she came in. Your behaviour was unfair to her, since you knew she would never do anything like that, nor did she have any romantic interest in Zoro. In fact, she barely had any interest in the swordsman at all. But according to your dream, that might change.

You curled up on your bed, pulling the blanket right up over your head to shield yourself from the real world. The familiar feeling of something wet running down your cheek informed you that you had started crying, but you couldn't care less. You couldn't move. You didn't have the energy to move, much less bring your hand up to wipe your tears away. So you just lay there, curled up in a foetal position, trying - and miserably failing - to get your mind off it.

A while later, a knock at your door caused you to jerk up in your bed, before you groaned and flopped back down.

"Go away!"

"Nami said you're sick," came Sanji's voice, "So I made you some soup. Please open the door."

You breathed a sigh of relief. It wasn't either of the two people you were currently trying to avoid. Slowly dragging yourself out of bed, you had to make even more effort to get yourself to the door. Forgetting that you had just been crying, you opened it and let the cook in, confused when his expression immediately grew alarmed.

"(Name), why are you crying??" He immediately set the soup down and pulled you into a comforting hug - one that seemed to be much warmer than usual right now.

"I-I'm fine," you mumbled into his shoulder, "Just not well."

He nodded, falling for your excuse, before pulling away to hand you the soup, "Here, this should help. If you need more, or if you need anything else, just let me know." He smiled at you, before leaving you alone once again.

You sat back down on your bed and ate the soup - because who can say no to Sanji's cooking, even if you're not really in the mood to eat? And it did help, the warmth helping to settle your queasy stomach and alleviate the nausea if only a little bit. Minutes after you finished it, there was another knock and you frowned, wondering who it was now.

You didn't answer, in fear of it being Zoro.

Just the thought of Zoro had you replaying that dream all over again, and before you could stop yourself or at least soften the sound, sobs were wracking your body and you were burying your face in your hands, crying into their warmth.

The door opened and a familiar set of heavy footsteps reached your ears before the bed dipped beside you. Your entire body froze up, tensing at the arrival of the green-haired swordsman. Your sobs fell silent, hiccups replacing them as you stilled and tried your best to quell your sadness - still keeping your face hidden.

"What happened?" Came that usually-comforting deep voice you loved so much, but that now caused your nausea to return. "What's wrong, (Name)?"

"Please go away," you found yourself speaking, not wanting to push him away but knowing you'd feel even more ridiculous if he found out how you felt about him while you were recounting a silly dream.

"No."

Usually the swordsman would leave without a word if you asked for space, or if you told him to go away, but this time he could see you were absolutely not okay and you needed someone. Luffy wouldn't be a good idea, Usopp wouldn't know what to do, and you seemed to be avoiding Nami. And he sure as hell did not want that stupid cook anywhere near you right now, in fear of him comforting you so well that the swordsman would lose you to him entirely.

You didn't respond to that, so Zoro brought his hands up to slowly and gently peel yours away from your face. You let him, shocking yourself, and the sight of your bloodshot eyes and tear-stained face caused his heart to constrict painfully.

"Tell me what's wrong."

He held your hands in his own, not wanting to let go. He had waited so long to be able to hold them, and he was glad for this excuse to. But he was heartbroken seeing you so upset and apparently sick over something he didn't know about yet. He gently squeezed your hands, silently encouraging you to speak. He wasn't good with words, but if comfort was what you needed he would do and say whatever he could to make your pain go away.

"It's you and Nami."

He stiffened. He didn't know what that meant, but just hearing he was part of the reason you were so upset made his heart sink.

"What did we do?"

"It's...um...it's silly," you replied quietly, voice low but pain still evident. "It doesn't matter." You tried pulling your hands away, but Zoro only gripped them tighter.

"It does, if it's making you this upset."

Reluctantly, you relayed to him what you had dreamed about, voice cracking halfway through as more tears fell. You felt even sillier saying it to someone else, especially him, and avoided making eye-contact throughout the entire explanation. When you finished, you shot him a small, brief glance - only to do a double take when you saw the absolutely horrified and disgusted look on his face.

"Me and the thief?" He questioned, distaste clear in his tone. "You've got to be kidding me." He sighed, sneakily shifting closer to you on the bed. "That can't be possible."

"But-"

"Some of your dreams don't come true," he reminded you, "This is definitely one of those. You want to know how I know?"

You nodded slowly, biting your lip.

You did not expect his next words.

"Because I already dream about doing that with you."

Your jaw dropped. If you were like Luffy, it would have probably dropped all the way to the floor, you were so stunned by his confession. Your formerly slowed heartbeat picked up speed again, heat filling your cheeks as you processed his words.

"Me?"

"Mhm. Only you. Been a recurring dream, actually."

As you stuttered out an incomplete sentence and then stammered through some nonsense, Zoro leaned in slowly and pressed his lips against yours, locking you in a slow but sweet kiss. His lips were warm and soft, inviting you to lean into him and return the kiss. The affectionate gesture had butterflies blooming in your stomach.

"I'm sorry," you whispered once you remembered how to speak.

"There's nothing to be sorry for," he murmured, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead before pulling you into a warm, comforting and secure embrace.

You sat like that quietly for a while, Zoro rubbing soothing circles onto your back while you clung to him, face buried in his neck. He kissed the top of your head every few minutes, in between mumbling sweet words of comfort into your ear - mainly "you're beautiful" and "i'm yours" because he didn't know what else to say. But it was enough for you.

Eventually, he spoke up.

"You should clear things up with Nami. She's upset because you're not talking to her."

"I know...later."

He chuckled and tightened his grip on you, keeping you warm and increasingly happy in his strong arms. He didn't intend on letting go, but that was good because you didn't want him to.

BONUS:

"STUPID MOSSHEAD!"

Loud banging and clanging jerked you awake the morning after your confessions, the sound of Sanji's loud exclamation having woken you - but not Zoro - up. He probably had woken up the others as well.

You tried to get up to see what was wrong, but Zoro refused to let go. He was still sleeping, but his arms wound around you even tighter, pulling you back against him. You sighed, knowing you could ask someone else later anyway.

Nami poked her head around the divider and smirked, "He's upset that Zoro finally confessed and ruined his chance to woo you."

You laughed at that, "Give him an hour, max. Then he'll try to woo you."

She groaned, "I'm already dreading it."

The two of you laughed, and it felt good to be back on speaking terms with her. Even though, strictly speaking, you hadn't had a reason not to be in the first place. But oh well.

The power of dreams...

#one piece #opla #one piece live action #zoro x reader #roronoa zoro #opla zoro #opla x reader #zoro x you #opla zoro x reader #op #opla zoro x you

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bakugou-katsukis-wife · 4 months

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Pairing: bakugou katsuki x fem!Reader

Genre: fluff.

Summary: you've been caught singing and dancing in your room, you thought you were alone? Just you and your guilty pleasure? Nuh uh, your roommate, aka your boyfriend of 2 months, is still at home.

Warnings: none, just fluff ♡. (Reader is a swifty?) (Also, it's not proof read. Spare me-)

Here you were, having the time of your life; You danced across the room singing your heart out... your hair brush a make-shift mic for now.

You jammed to the most random Playlist of songs, not that it mattered. You felt free and yourself. Especially now that you were alone, you could sing and be all giddy over love songs you now imagine to be you and katsuki♡.

One second your singing 'my tears ricochet' by taylor swift doing the classic:

'I can go anywhere I want... anywhere I want,

Just. Not. Home.'

While sobbing your eyes out on top of your bed as you fail to do the movement due the blanket being too heavy on your back-

And then there's this other mood minutes after, here you're jumping around like a 5 year old singing 'Nonsense ' by Sabrina carpenter. All the while thinking of your one and only, katsuki.

As you tire out, and sad songs... well the song 'if the world was ending' came on,

You just sat there, an ugly crying mess while you sang your heart out, wether you were in tune or not you just cried thinking if katsuki left you... will this be the two of you?

As you spent your good time while thinking in your dilemma, you were all the while oblivious of a certain pair of vermilion eyes who watched all of these mood changes during the past 3 hours... which he had said he'd be out training.

Katsuki was about to leave, he was just by the door going to unlock it and go out. But that's when he heard your speakers start playing songs that you'd listen to in the car often.

He was obviously curious as to what was going on cause a few seconds later, sounds of thumping around came from inside your room.

He crept his way slowly, and stood right outside your door. He was gonna knock with his knuckles but as soon as he laid his knuckles on the door it creeked open just a bit, giving him some space to see through... and he did.

He saw you going around your room grabbing your hair brush as it it were a mic and he saw how big your smile was and just how happy you looked enjoying your own company.

He chuckled to himself...

He could train later. This is better entertainment.

He watched his girlfriend go through the 7 stages of grief, fall in love, fall off her bed, slip into her blanket as she still continued to sing though muffled. And he saw her sob.

Was it fun watching her do her thing? Fuck yeah.

But is it worth seeing her cry? The fuck do ya mean? He is going in there to smash this stupid speaker, that caused his pretty girl to be in tears.

Rest be assured, the speaker did get thrown on the floor and you were hundred percent taken care of that night.

Even if you were embarrassed at first, you explained how you were just having fun and weren't really heartbroken.

He's gonna buy multiple more speakers. You know it, He knows it too.

Comments and reblogs are highly appreciated!

(Asks open!)

Masterlist

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ikeuverse · 16 days

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SLOW DOWN — s.jaeyun

CHAPTERS: prologue | chapter one | chapter two | [...]

PAIRING: illegal!jake x fem!reader GENRES: angst, smut, fluff WC: 7.0k+

WARNINGS: physical and verbal fights, lots of swearing, blood, mention of killing.

NOTES: i intend to tell you a little about each event in each chapter to leave you with a taste of what you want more. things are coming together and, yeah, smut in the next chapter? did i hear that? i hope you like it!

TAGLIST: @yeonzzzn @alvojake @seunghancore @hoondiors @jakesbffie @cheerrxy @slutforsjy @lilyuwon @ramenoil @eneiyri @nctislifue @bluejay3m @srhnyx @brownsugarbaybee @nshmrarki ++ lmk if i’ve forgotten anyone or if more people want to be added

masterlist

Counting how long you and Chloe had been in that nightclub wasn't something you cared much about, not least because the amount of alcohol in your system was starting to make your vision a little too slow.

Looking at your best friend, she had a bright smile as she balanced her glass and walked with you to one of the tables in the corner of the place. She sat down on one of the stools and pulled you to sit with her.

"You know what?" Chloe leaned towards you, resting her forehead on your shoulder. You automatically leaned your head on hers "I love you."

You knew it was the drink, but you laughed at her confession. Even though you knew that your friend loved you and you loved her back, there was no reason to find it funny, you could only be drunk enough.

"I love you more" you said back, kissing the top of her head.

Saying that you loved each other wasn't unusual, you both used to say how you felt and how much you loved each other. Being drunk and saying it made things ten times lighter, even funny because Chloe also laughed after hearing you say those words.

"Wow, what a beautiful smile" the male voice took you and Chloe out of the sisterly moment as you looked straight ahead. The man might have been well-dressed a few hours ago when he entered that club, but after a few hours the sweat was dripping down his forehead and his former tuft was now almost falling apart. But that didn't make him ugly, on the contrary, he looked very handsome as he approached the two of you.

"Who did you mean that for?" you asked.

"To both of you, actually" he said, smiling a little more "Can I join you?"

You wanted to deny it, but Chloe agreed straight away and moved away from one of the benches so the boy could sit next to her. Leaving your best friend between you and the stranger.

"I'm Jungsu" the boy left his glass on the table, straightening his shirt "I've been watching you two for a while, you know" as Jungsu spoke, you could make out his features. Well-defined lines on his face, and his arms weren't muscular, but he could certainly work on his chest. Because they were big.

"Oh, really?" you heard Chloe ask with a surprised tone, he agreed with a smile as his eyes landed on you.

"Are you two alone here?" he asked.

Something clicked in your mind, in a few seconds making you a little more sober than usual.

"If you've been watching us for a while, you should already know the answer" you said without thinking.

The look Jungsu gave you could only indicate one thing. He knew how it worked. Perhaps he knew you or someone who worked for your father because he didn't seem surprised by your answer. On the contrary.

"I see you're the smart one around here" his smile made your stomach turn. The boy's striking lines, once handsome, now became repulsive as he stood up and stopped in front of her "Come on, I just want to have fun. Just like you."

"And how do you intend to do that?" Chloe looked up, glaring at the boy.

"Maybe with the two of you—"

The chill ran through her body at the exact moment Jungsu was yanked backward with all his might and then thrown to the ground. You weren't startled by the thud or Chloe's cry of astonishment, but by Jake standing over the man as he landed the first punch.

"You motherfucker!" he shouted, throwing the second punch.

Your eyes quickly searched around, noticing that Heeseung was already running towards Jake to try to get him off the man who was barely defending himself.

"We found you two" Sunoo ran up to you and Chloe, holding your best friend by the shoulders as she lifted her off the bench "How about we go home?"

"But Jake..." Chloe began.

"He'll be here a while, trust me" Sunoo reassured her, he didn't need to tell you anything because you knew it was true. Only Heeseung and Jay were capable of getting him off someone, and seeing how difficult it was for the two friends to do it, it might take a while.

"Is that all you know how to do, Sim Jayeun?" the man flashed a blood-covered smile when Jake stopped punching him.

"I told you to stay away, you fucking bastard!" he shouted, feeling his pulse stop in mid-air as Jay held him down with all his might.

"Which one is your girlfriend?" Jungsu whimpered as Jay managed to pull Jake off him. A few men helped the one on the ground to his feet, some people surrounded the scene of the fight, but they didn't seem that shocked.

You could tell that maybe this place was also a mafia hangout because people weren't surprised that a fight was going on. Even more so with so many men with guns and looking like such big, unsightly monuments.

"Shut up" Jake said.

"What? Is that her?" he spat, pointing in your direction. You were still walking with Sunoo and Chloe, turning around when Jungsu spoke too loudly, afraid that he had said something else offensive to Jake. The man's bloody grin widened as everything began to get a little quieter than he would have liked "Oh, that's her all right. Y/n."

He knew your name. Shit, and you let it show when your face contorted in shock at hearing it so well.

"Fuck, that's her" Jungsu took a step towards you, only to be stopped by Heeseung and Keeho who were right next to him "Hey y/n, I bet Jake's keeping a dirty little secret from you, isn't he?"

"Jungsu, don't" Jake pleaded, but he knew it was in vain. He was shaking and didn't know if it was from anger or fear of what he was about to hear.

Your throat closed up and your heart raced when he said it. So everyone knew Jake's secret except you? He had secrets?

"What?" you got away from Sunoo, he almost shouted because he was torn between holding Chloe completely drunk or going after you.

Jake's pleading eyes asked you not to take another step, but you weren't looking directly at him. Your eyes were completely on Jungsu now.

"How do you know my name?" you asked.

"Oh, dear. Everyone knows who you are" he didn't mind the blood dripping from his lips "By the way, do you know that Jake had a brother?" his question didn't even have time to be processed, and you heard another one straight away "And do you know that he approached you out of pure interest?

Now your eyes were on Jake, silently wondering why the man was saying all this. Jake had a brother? Okay, that wasn't so bad, but him approaching you out of interest?

So everything you two had lived through had been a lie? Was that why he'd chosen the job, after all?

Jake didn't let his thoughts get any deeper. He ran past to pick another fight with Jungsu, you couldn't see what was going on because your view had been blocked by Keeho.

"How about we get out of here?" he asked you, trying to put on the best smile he could manage, even though it looked like a grimace at the moment.

"No. I want to—"

"Jay's taking him right now" Keeho said "Just, please, let's get out of here."

It wasn't clear whether his request had been a plea or an urgency, given the moment that the curses between Jake and Jungsu were heard.

Your head was spinning, a whirlwind of things was happening and you just really wanted to get out of there. But you didn't want to leave any of the boys behind, so even though you followed Keeho to the car, you didn't get in until Jake had left the club carried by Jay and Heeseung.

You looked away to see inside the vehicle next to you, Chloe lying peacefully asleep with her head on Sunoo's shoulder. He tried to smile at you, you smiled back and looked at the three who had just arrived.

"I'm going to kill him" Jake shouted.

"You calm the fucking down" Jay shouted back, making Jake stop fussing. Hearing him swear was something unusual, and anyone who knew Jay would be in shock when any swear word came out of his mouth "Let's get in the fucking car and go home."

Gradually the boys split up to get into their cars and drive away, and it was at that moment that you realized there was only you and Jake left.

Your gaze didn't want to meet his face because your heart was beating too hard, and you knew that with any eye contact, everything would easily fall apart. But Jake wasn't thinking like that, he needed your gaze on him. And as soon as Jake's fingers touched your chin, making you look at him, everything really fell apart.

Your vision was blurred by the amount of tears, noticing a cut on his cheek and a bruised lip. But nothing the bandages couldn't fix. Jake's eyes were also glossy, indicating that he was about to cry.

"What Jungsu said—" Jake felt his voice shaking, the knot in his throat preventing him from speaking. He knew he would cry copiously as long as he stood there looking at you.

"Let's go home" you also said shakily, not wanting to say anything else that wasn't necessary.

Jake just nodded, sighing loudly and preventing any tears from coming out. He decided to drive away, going in the car with Sunoo and Chloe, leaving you to go with Keeho and Heeseung. Maybe it was better to get away from him at least on the way home.

Jake never thought he would feel so empty not having your eyes fixed on him. He knew that you often looked away in the same room as him or even avoided looking at him, but your attention was on what Jake was saying or doing. Not now.

Now your attention was entirely on your feet walking down the hallway of the mansion as he walked beside you to your living room.

Jake's heart was still racing from the previous events and flashes of the scenes were going through his head. Sooner or later you would know everything, even if he wanted to hide it for so long, Jake knew that one day he would tell you about his brother, about why he had joined the mafia. He just didn't know that everything would be ruined by the disservice of someone who was only there to get in the way.

He felt his blood boil when he remembered Jungsu's words when he remembered your looking at him for answers that Jake didn't know how to give. He wanted to pull you out of that dance club and tell you everything.

But first, someone had to spoil it, making things up without any foundation because that's what happened in that environment. People made up rumors, and stories that had never happened just to see someone lose their head or get what they wanted. In this case, Jungsu wanted to make Jake lose his mind and, at worst, he wanted to steal you away from Jake.

The thought alone made the boy press his nails even harder against his own palm until the burning took over his skin.

"Jake!" you called out loudly, pulling his fists forward, and it was then that he realized that the two of you had already come to your office to get some things for his injuries.

"Sorry, I—" he pulled his hands back, opening them and seeing the nail marks starting to bleed "I'll clean this up."

"You can let me clean it up, we need to take care of your face" your shaky voice indicated that, at any moment, you were going to cry and Jake didn't even blame you because he was exactly the same way.

Raising his eyes in your direction, he noticed that you were picking everything up carefully, or moving slowly just to prolong the time you had to get close to him and tend to his wounds. Jake sighed at the idea of the last thought being true, so he just accepted it until you had picked everything up and returned to him.

Before you could even wet the absorbent cotton or put anything on his face, Jake grabbed your hand and made you stop. It wasn't a sudden act, but it made you tense in place and avoid looking up as he wanted. You stayed that way for a short while because when he called your name, in a whisper so low that even the slightest approach would be heard. It made you look up and face Jake.

You shouldn't have done that, he's too close. You thought to yourself, almost feeling your heart beat out of your throat as his eyes looked at you with such intensity.

"Can we do this in your room?" he asked, speaking again as soon as he noticed your mouth open, probably contradicting his question "I don't feel like seeing anyone, and I feel like the boys are going to look for me here."

You nodded, it wasn't as if you never tended to Jake's wounds in your room. That happened more often than in your care room, so you just gathered enough materials and indicated for him to follow you.

Walking to your room in silence wasn't torturous for Jake, it helped him think about all the things at once. Reorganize your thoughts and even the view in front of him.

He knew that in your mind, you thought that everything that had happened between the two of you was purely out of interest, could see the sadness in your eyes after Jungsu mentioned that lie. Jake just didn't know if you would listen to him after everything if he deserved to be listened to after hiding things from you for his own good and yours.

You went into your room first and dumped your things on the table next to a huge sofa in the corner of the room. Jake entered next, noticing that nothing had moved since the last time he was there. Maybe another picture of you and Chloe hanging on the photo wall you had or a flower that Sunoo sent you because he always did that.

And you always took care of all the flowers you received, he was sure because he remembered the times you picked up a handful on the way home before sneaking into your room. Jake would leave the flowers on the table waiting for you to come home from work or somewhere you'd gone with your dad and your best friend. You looked after the flowers until the last second of their life.

"Okay, here it is" your voice snapped Jake out of his nostalgic thoughts only to make him widen his eyes at the scene in front of him. You were holding a change of clothes out to him.

"What..."

"I still keep a lot of your things here, it's not that hard to find something of yours in my closet" you tried to smile, but the pain in your eyes made them shine even brighter. Struggling not to let any tears fall, Jake picked up his clothes and waved at you "You can take a shower here, I'll go in the other room."

"No, I'll do it" he stopped you "You can shower, I'll go in the next room and get ready and I'll be right back."

You knew this argument wouldn't be won by you, so you let him leave the room quickly in his clean clothes before closing the door.

A weight left your body as soon as you stepped under the warm rain, wetting everything you could and closing your eyes as you began to wash your hair. You wanted that water to have the power to take away all the bad feelings you were having and all the urge to cry that was stirring inside you. But perhaps it could be released little by little, so you allowed yourself to cry. Letting the tears fall, mixing with hot water as they soaked your face, and then opening your eyes.

Swallowing sobs as you spent more than forty minutes under the water, not wanting to get out so soon, but you had to. Someone was waiting for you in the bedroom and you didn't even know if Jake was back yet, so you had to be quick.

Having finished washing, drying off, and putting on your pajama shorts along with a T-shirt – which was also Jake's – you left your hair damp until you left the bathroom. And you were right, Jake was already waiting for you in the bedroom.

He was sitting on the edge of your bed and facing the window, his hair was damp like yours and the black sweatshirt matching the black T-shirt you had given him made everything stand out even more in your room, which had always been in lighter tones.

Jake looked in your direction as soon as your footsteps began to be heard around the room, and he couldn't help smiling when he noticed his T-shirt in your room. Such a familiar scene.

"I hope you don't mind..." you started to say as soon as you saw him staring too long at the T-shirt.

"Never. I always liked you wearing my clothes" he was still smiling, and you wondered if that bruise on his mouth didn't bother him when he did that.

Taking advantage of the fact that Jake was sitting on the edge of your bed, you picked up the things you had left on the table earlier and approached him again. On instinct, Jake spread his legs for you to sit on, which you did.

"Let me know if it hurts, okay?" you asked, hearing him murmur in agreement and keep quiet while keeping his eyes closed.

It didn't hurt at all because you were always so careful, even more so with him. Jake wanted a little excuse to grunt in pain and grab your waist, but no, he could only relax and hear your voice calling him as soon as it was over.

He opened his eyes and noticed that you were already on your back, throwing the disposables in the trash and arranging what was left of the medical care so that you could take it out of your room later.

"Y/n" he remained sitting on your bed, his eyes still on your figure when you turned to face him.

Jake didn't say anything, he couldn't. Not because he had nothing to say, but because too many things wanted to come out at once and he was afraid of saying the wrong thing.

Where would Jake start... by telling you about his brother? Or tell you how he approached you and really fell in love with you? Or should he tell you how sorry he was and take you to the hospital so you could see what he did apart from the extremely dangerous missions he went on?

Jake wanted to have the right order of words in his mind so that he wouldn't have to feel nervous in front of you. It was as if he was talking to you for the first time.

It was as if you were approaching him for the first time, looking into his eyes in such a brilliant and painful way that Jake wanted nothing more than to disappear. Take everything you were feeling and leave, because you were sad because of him. You had cried because of him.

"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry" Jake let the whisper slip out when you were close enough to him, almost touching his knee with one of your legs when you stopped facing him.

"It's okay" you tried to whisper in the same tone as him, sending a small smile when Jake's eyes couldn't take it anymore.

The whole thing spilled over because he felt he didn't deserve any of it. Jake deserved to be seen as a bloodthirsty monster who killed without shame and only earned the highest salary for it. He should continue to have you glare at him while thinking that he had chosen the job over you. Jake deserved every bad thing that was happening.

"Please, Y/n, I'm so sorry" he sobbed and lost himself in the moment with his head buried in your belly and your fingers in his hair. Jake cried softly and pulled you even tighter against his body when he felt your lips between his hair.

I don't deserve any of this, Jake thought.

You released him from the embrace as soon as you heard him stop crying little by little, sniffling softly when one last sigh left Jake's lips and he pulled you to sit next to him.

Feeling daring, Jake turned to face you, sitting on your bed and leaning close enough to rest his forehead against yours.

"I know you don't want to listen to me right now, even though I have a lot to say" the low tone sending shivers throughout your body, Jake's breath hitting your skin "But I just want you to know that the last thing Jungsu said was a lie. I never approached you out of interest."

You bit your lower lip to stop yourself from sighing with relief, not wanting to show that it had made you feel a little better. Even if you were still wary because he could be lying... couldn't he? According to Jungsu, Jake had a little secret, so was that it?

"Please stop feeding these lies in your head" he snapped you out of your thoughts and made you look at him "I can hear your mind screaming from here."

"I'm sorry, I—" you kept looking at Jake until you brought your hands forward and took his hands in yours "It's a lot to process..."

"I'm here and we'll talk about it later, okay?"

He seemed genuinely keen to talk later. Things that Jake had always shied away from or refused to tell you, he was now openly saying that the two of you should talk about.

"All right" you clasped your hands in his "How about we get some sleep now?"

"Okay" Jake moved his face away from yours, reluctant to let go of your hands as well "Anything, I'll be in the next room" he leaned towards you and left a slow kiss on your forehead. The sensation made you close your eyes, how you missed that kiss from him.

"Good night, Jake" you said.

"Good night, Y/n. See you tomorrow" he whispered with his lips still on your forehead, pulling away and getting out of bed to walk out of your room.

You followed him with your gaze until he was out of sight, hearing the door close and allowing yourself to throw your whole body onto the bed.

Part of you wanted to ask him to sleep there, with his body wrapped around yours and spending the night listening to his warm breath close enough. But another part of you was still upset and confused by everything that was happening, so you were grateful that he was able to think about it and make the two of you sleep apart at least that night. Jake probably wanted to think about everything too, and sleeping with you certainly wouldn't help the process.

Hugging each other's pillows and snuggling under the covers, at the same time and in separate rooms, you both thought about each other before falling asleep.

You could feel the weight of Heeseung's and Niki's gaze on you as you curled up a little more in the armchair, sipping the mug of hot chocolate you had ordered a few minutes ago.

Your two friends were looking just as sleepy as you, Niki almost devouring a piece of toast with cheese and Heeseung sipping the freshly brewed coffee he had also ordered.

The first few minutes of the morning in silence were crucial to your good mood for the rest of the day, but today in particular you were apprehensive and wanted to say everything that was on your mind. Firstly because Niki had knocked on your bedroom door and whispered to you to come down and have some coffee. Secondly, Heeseung seemed a little more restless than usual, if it weren't for the number of times he moved around in that armchair you could have sworn he wanted to run out of there.

"Y/n" Niki was the first to break the silence after he'd finished eating his toast, wiping any leftover bread from his mouth and settling lazily into his chair.

You mumbled something to show that you were listening to him, sipping more of your hot chocolate and letting the liquid warm your whole body.

Niki quickly glanced at Heeseung, grateful that you were staring at the irregular shapes your chocolate made with the milk mixture, missing the moment when the two of you hissed at each other for fear that you would hear.

Your gaze followed Niki at the exact moment he stopped hissing curses at Heeseung and started looking at you. A small smile adorned his lips as he clasped his hands together and rested his arms on the knees.

"Did you sleep well? Would you like something to eat besides hot chocolate?" he asked.

You took the last sip from your mug and placed it on the table in front of you, leaning back in the armchair and looking at him.

"What happened?" you asked him back, "You two are strange."

"We are strange" Heeseung rolled his eyes playfully and felt relieved when he heard you laugh, at least the morning sulk had passed. Then he straightened up a little more where he was sitting, rummaged in his back pocket, and pulled out a small envelope "This is for you."

"For me?" your brow furrowed in surprise. You didn't usually receive any letters, especially if one of your friends had delivered them. So receiving something like this made you feel surprised, but not hesitant, so you quickly snuck up at the same second as Heeseung to grab the envelope from his hands.

It was then that the pieces fell into place and you understood why the two people in front of you were so apprehensive.

Read it with Heeseung and Niki by your side, please. That's what the top of the envelope said, and Jake's unmistakable handwriting made your stomach turn.

Searching for answers, you looked at the two boys in front of you in the breakfast room and silently asked one of them to say something.

"He just asked me to give it to you" as if Heeseung had the power to read minds, he replied lowly, "Jake left in a hurry this morning with Jay and, well, we were in charge of leaving it with you."

You wanted to get angry and think that he'd run off once again, that Jake simply didn't want to explain himself to you while he went off with Jay to who knows where. But no, he didn't do that this time. Although an envelope wasn't a big deal because you hadn't even opened it yet, maybe something in there would make you think differently.

"Do you want to read it here? Or somewhere else?" Niki asked you.

"Can we read here?" you said, seeing that they both agreed with you.

The place wasn't too bad and no one would go there uninvited, it was one of their favorite corners of the mansion to have coffee or just go with Chloe when she was there. Choosing that environment for your breakfast had been a good idea, even if unintentionally.

"Before... Can I ask you something?"

"If we know the answer, of course" Heeseung said this time.

Your eyes were starting to blur and you took a deep breath to push away any urge to cry, or any heavy feeling that was enveloping your chest and taking over your body.

It wasn't going to beat you. Nothing was going to take you over like it had recently, even if the last night was replaying in your mind. Even if all the events surrounding your relationship with Jake were part of the reason why you were so easily vulnerable.

Playing with the paper in the envelope between your fingers, staring at Jake's hasty handwriting, and re-reading what was written there – at least three times – you finally looked at your friends again.

"Do you two know what's written in here?" you asked.

There was a certain period when Niki and Heeseung searched each other's gaze for a way to tell you that they did. They knew what Jake had written and even saw him cry copiously as he put every word on that paper.

They both wanted to say that Jake had finally plucked up the courage to tell you what was going on, but they also wanted you to find out for yourself as the older of the two in front of you nodded.

"We know and we even stayed with him while he was writing" Heeseung decided to be brief, even if the additional information didn't need to be said. But he wanted to lend credibility and make you feel a little less tense as he looked at you "And we're with you now."

You wanted to thank him for his words, even if nothing could be said to calm you down at that moment. Heeseung knew that, but it was worth a try.

So, with trembling fingers and irregular breathing, you opened the envelope and took the paper out.

Praying and asking everything you believed that, although those pages contained what Jake wanted to tell you, you would find him after reading every little word.

The blood on Jake's knuckles was nothing compared to the fury he felt as he threw another punch, hitting the jaw in front of him.

"You're still refusing to talk, aren't you?" he laughed sarcastically at the man in front of him, barely managing to mumble anything as he stared at Jake.

"I told you!" he muttered as best he could, spitting out the blood that had accumulated and groaning in pain.

Jake moved a little closer, his uninjured hand gripping the man's dark hair as he grinned devilishly. Anyone who says they've never been scared of Jake Sim is because they've never had the displeasure of running into him in a mob torture chamber. That man turned into the most perverse being anyone had ever seen.

"It wasn't enough, you know" Jake's lips were close to the other man's ear "Should we call Jungsu now, or are you going to open your fucking mouth and tell me?"

He knew he wasn't going to get much, it had been two hours since Jake had kept him in that room, torturing him in every way and he had never said anything very relevant. But the lack of understanding and the blindness of anger made Jake unreachable.

"Jay" he shouted to his friend on the other side of the mirrored glass, and after a few minutes the boy appeared beside him "Call Jungsu, now."

"No!" the man shouted, to no avail. Jay was already asking one of his cronies to call Jungsu and picked up the phone as he did so.

In any other situation, Jake might take pity on someone who had a swollen face – probably a broken nose – and blood coming out of their mouth. Cuts and bruises were the only thing visible on the very little skin left untouched. Jake would feel sorry for what he had done to someone in this situation, but he just couldn't think straight. Not when he was close enough to answer.

"Hello?" Jungsu answered, Jay quickly passed the phone to Jake – who wasted no time in putting it on speaker.

"Hey Jungsu, how's your day going?" he asked as casually as if he wasn't in a torture chamber with blood – literally – on his hands.

"Jake Sim?" he asked, spending a few seconds before saying again, "What the fuck are you calling me for?"

"Hey, watch your tone with me, you fucking asshole" Jake laughed "But I think you should check if anyone's around."

"Anyone missing? What are you talking about?" Jungsu stirred from wherever he was, the noise on the other end of the line indicating that he was walking somewhere. A few voices passed through the call as Jake waited patiently "Jake, what the fuck did you do?"

"Oh" he smiled at the boy in front of him "He doesn't even remember you're gone, Dave" a false pout adorned his lips as he looked at him.

"Dave? Jake Sim, you bastard" Jungsu shouted from the other end of the line, more footsteps being heard and voices booming "What did you do to him? I'm going to kill you!"

"Hey, relax man" Jake said into the speakerphone, pulling away from Dave and walking across the room "I found your little boyfriend out for a morning walk, so I called him over to talk."

"I should have killed your girlfriend when I had the chance."

"You wouldn't be here now. You know that, don't you?" Jake tried to look as calm as possible at his mention of the conversation, moving the phone to the other ear and leaning against the table in the corner of the room. His gaze went to Dave who was struggling to keep his eyes open.

"What do you want, Sim? Just fucking say it" Jungsu was exasperated. Jake knew he was rushing to find Dave anywhere. He breathed a sigh of relief as he asked Niki to deactivate any possible location.

"I want to know the truth" Jake rested his free hand on his elbow, moistening his lips with the tip of his tongue. His throat went dry when he thought about saying it out loud, but everything was already so hot that he couldn't let it go "I want to know who of your men left my brother in a coma. And when I find out, you can be sure I'm going to kill him with my bare hands."

Jake swore he heard Jungsu swallow dry and so loudly that he, feeling manic, laughed at the sheer desperation of the man on the other end of the line.

"You have twenty-four hours to give me information, or your precious Dave will be back with you, that's for sure" he pouted with his lower lip even though Jungsu couldn't see, "but he won't be breathing anymore." Before he could hear any screams from the other man, Jake hung up.

At that moment across the room, Dave had fainted, because Jay and Sungchan were teaming up to lift him onto the chair, and even though Jake was against it, someone should clean him up. He'd gone too far and might recognize it later, but he wasn't going to stop them from at least taking away the excess of what his anger had done.

"Are you sick or what?" Heeseung ran a hand through his hair, exasperated as he watched Jake put the bandage on his finger. That job didn't need to be done by you, not to mention that it would lead to a big explanation as to why Jake was hurt like that. And that was something he wanted to avoid at the moment.

"I told you I'd do it" Jake warned, leaning back on the table after wrapping his middle finger in the band-aid.

"You said you'd talk to Jungsu, not kidnap his boyfriend" the other boy paced back and forth in the room, taking a deep breath as he went over the information Jake had given him a few minutes ago.

"And Y/n, where is she?"

"Probably in her room reading your letter" Heeseung turned to Jake "She changed her mind and said she wanted to do it alone, but Niki is in the corridors in case she needs anything."

"She'll need it" Jake said.

"Did you write everything in that letter?" his friend approached him, leaning against the table next to Jake and hearing him agree with a quick sound coming out of his mouth "About your brother and why you're in this fucking job?"

"Everything, every detail" Jake bit his lower lip to avoid any expression radiating from his face. Whether it was pure fear or nervousness, he didn't want Heeseung to know.

"So she'll probably want to kill you in a few minutes, or be running around the mansion to hug and kiss you."

"I think I'll take the first option, knowing Y/n the way I do" he laughed, being joined by his friend.

Jake knew it wasn't the best way to tell him everything that had happened since he joined the mafia a few years ago. Perhaps holding your hand, looking into your eyes, and saying everything out loud was the best thing to do, but as always Jake felt afraid. He felt himself becoming more and more fearful and cowardly when it came to facing reality and saying it out loud. Especially to you.

Writing it all down made Jake relive every moment since he first set foot in that mansion. Bad feelings surged through every ounce of his body as he felt his eyes burn from staring at anyone who passed his way.

If they were to personify the word revenge, it would surely be Jake on the day he arrived at the mansion. Or as he prefers to remember it, the day he met you.

"All I know is that I was close enough and I know that Jungsu will bring some information, we're almost there, Heeseung."

"You just can't forget how much Y/n's father is betting on it and putting a lot more people on the missions you call, can you?" Jake sighed at the thought, knowing that Heeseung was right as he said, "I know you're close to knowing who did this, but don't forget that there are people with you. And we don't want anyone to die in the process, do we?"

"No, I don't want that" Jake looked at him, sincerity in his eyes. He knew that all his anger was blinding him when it came to knowing who had done all this to his brother.

Jake wanted to try to be a little more rational after having gotten so close, and after having taken someone as bait to get Jungsu to tell him what he wanted to know.

His thoughts were soon interrupted when a few faint knocks sounded against the thick wood of the office door. Jake and Heeseung turned and the latter called out, welcoming Niki in. He had a humorless smile on his face and his hands in his sweatshirt pockets.

"Hey, how are you two?" he asked as soon as he had closed the door.

"What the fuck did you do, Nishimura?" Jake looked at him, then took a step forward. Heeseung was quicker, pulling Jake by the shirt and making his friend stagger over to the coffee table in the office.

"What happened?" Heeseung looked at him.

There was silence for a while as Niki looked between Jake and Heeseung, then at the paintings hanging on the office wall. He wondered how long it had taken the artist to make so many stars in a painting of the night sky, each brushstroke must have been very precise because there wasn't a single blur. At least not a visible one.

"Right..." he snorted, taking his hands out of his pockets and pulling the hood of his sweatshirt up over his head to try and hide from his friends. But to no avail, Niki knew he was being very well seen by the two in the room. So he turned around and pulled the hood off his head, tensing his jaw as he noticed each of the expressions staring back at him "How likely is it that Y/n jumped out of her bedroom window and ran away?"

"What the fuck are you talking about, Niki?" Jake laughed a little as he looked at him, stopping laughing the moment he saw that Niki hadn't flinched for a single second and hadn't made a single move since he'd said that "Dude, what did you just say?"

"Y/n jumped out her fucking bedroom window? What do you mean?" Heeseung almost shouted.

Niki wanted to cry already imagining what would happen because you were under his supervision.

"I was in the hallway and every five minutes I'd knock on the door to see if she was okay, if she'd read the letter, or if she needed anything" Niki didn't dare move a muscle as he spoke, staying close to the wall and thanking Heeseung for standing between him and Jake "There was a time when she stopped answering the knocks, so I thought she was reading and wanted some time alone."

He was the one who was most in charge of checking up on you in that mansion because Niki's job had always been to take care of the electronic system and every such thing for your father. So working from home was more advantageous, not to mention the mountain of equipment he would have to take on each mission if he had to actively accompany his friends. So he ended up spending most of his time with you.

"Only that took many minutes and I ended up opening the bedroom door at one point" Niki mussed her hair quickly "The window was completely open, I searched under the bed, inside the closet, no sign of her."

"And have you told her father?" Heeseung asked, Niki nodded in agreement.

"I also checked the security cameras, she left with Chloe less than twenty minutes ago."

"Did you put a tracker on Chloe's car too?" Jake asked.

"I couldn't" Niki whined.

"Okay, let's try our luck and search the places they're going. Chloe's house, anything" Heeseung started to walk with Niki, but felt Jake push them both and get out in front.

"You two go check it out" he glared at his friends, looking like he could kill anyone as the orbs darkened and Jake's facial muscles clenched. Niki felt his throat go dry, if this was how he looked at every person he killed, he knew they had all died first of fear before being hit by any of Jake's weapons "I'm going to turn this fucking town upside down until I find Y/n."

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wandasfifthwife · 1 month

Text

beginners episode ✩‧₊˚

— hockey coach/player!wanda x ex figure skater! reader

tw || HEAVY TOPICS, injury (r = leg and brain), r’s mother is verbally/physically abusive, r’s mom sees herself in r, body-image issues, heavier angst w/ happy ending, hurt/comfort, established relationship (w&r), break ups (not w&r), past relationships, player!wanda for a minute, injury (w = broken nose), NOT PROOFREAD

a/n || this is wanda/reader’s past. reader’s past made me sad, it’s so sad, but you guys asked for this :(

series m.list ✩ ══╡˚2.1k words˚╞══ ✩ wanda m.list

Your mother had made a suggestion during dinner for you to get out more, have a sport or a club activity to join so you weren’t inside so much. She expressed concern, stating how others will view you if you’re not active in your community. You brought a few ideas to her attention, all were shut down except two—figure skating and debate club.

It wasn’t any surprise that they were chosen seeing as that’s what your mother had done when she was your age, pictures sitting around the house of her standing proud with an award in her hands.

Originally figure skating wasn’t what you wanted to do, but after your first lesson it grew on you already. You looked forward to each lesson, enjoying the conversations you had with the others present in the class.

A few months had passed since, and your mother had begun to attend your lessons, sitting on the stands. Originally you had walked up to her with a smile, asking her what she thought of your friends and what you’ve learned, but she was cold. Her answers were curt, short, telling you that you were doing fine.

You were six at the time. At age twelve she began to control you. Her rampant started with her dislike of your friends, a hand wrapped around your arm to keep you by her whenever you wanted to say hi. She kept you away, saying they aren’t worth your time. You didn’t feel it was right, but you didn’t want to upset her so you agreed, removing yourself from getting to know the others anymore. The realization of her demands didn’t affect you until a few days later when you sat alone in your room.

At age thirteen she had enough. She removed your classed, deciding that from now she’d teach you seeing as she used to skate. She almost made it to the Olympics, but her last performance held her back since she failed half off the spins.

You felt you were always in the rink. After school you were driven to practice. On the weekends you were woken up at 5AM for practice by your flicking your lights on. It was tiring, but fun. You looked forward to spending time with your mother and getting on the ice to learn a new trick. If you did well, she’d buy you something new like a new skate bag. She didn’t make a huge fuss about what you did, eyes looking away from you if you fell or talked back. You thought she was proud, unaware of the frustration growing inside her.

The older you got the stricter she got. By the time you were eighteen, you would be standing in the showers with tears in your eyes. Her bitter words stayed with you, affecting your life and eating away at you. You’d begun to wear modest clothes, scared that someone would view you the way your mom did.

When competitions neared is when your mom’s ugly side reared its head. She didn’t say anything if you won, but it was miles better than when you lost. Your hands would shake when you packed your bags, her presence hovering. The car rides were filled with the sound of her hushed yells, not wanting to make a scene for the cars surrounding hers. You’d be leaning as far away as you could, head resting on the window. You would cry from her words, each one putting walls around your heart until you’ve built one tall enough to tune her out.

Her words meant nothing to you anymore, not much did. You’d step onto the ice and practice and brush past her when the lesson ended. If she got mad at you, grabbing your arm before you left to rink so she could whisper yell into your ear—you’d shrug it off.

The relationship between you was strained, and yet you couldn’t hate her. You tried to find the good within her, seeking out pieces of her heart that would explain her actions. Your brother had no idea, off and gone to college he was gone from the house.

The phone would ring once a week as he checked in on you, understanding how your mom can get at times. Each time you brushed it off, saying you only have a year left before you can leave home.

That year got cut short.

Nationals came up. Everyone in the states showed up, stands full with people excited to see the next top skater. Your mother had been quiet, a soundless woman who moved around without sparing you a glance. The dress she got you was too small, itching at your body in specific areas where the stitching was done wrong. The outfits were made by your grandmother and given to your mom before she had passed. You understood it was special to your mom, but you wish you could take it off. At times it felt like a costume, like you were a spectacle for your mom to see herself in you.

The routine was done to swan lake. Your movements and outfit fit the theme, correlating and helping paint a picture for the audience. You had stepped onto the ice, breathing deep once you’ve found yourself in the middle and settled yourself into position.

Halfway through was a triple axel your mother has been pushing you to land. You had, but only four out of the hundreds of times you tried. She pushed you to, saying that you had to, that you needed to get through to the Olympic team.

You twisted your ankle to jump into the turn and found yourself crashing, sliding with speed until you hit the wall. Your mother’s voice carried over the silenced rink, echoing her screams telling you to get up. You couldn’t move, let alone get up. The wind had been pushed out from your lungs, escaping you in second leaving you heaving on the cold ground, the ice wetting your back.

Shadows were on top of you, hands beginning to take you off of the ice. Questions were thrown your way, asking how you felt and if you could stand. They helped you up but after one step with your left foot, you crumbled with a sob. The medics changed their grasp on you, easing up to stop the pain jolting up your leg with each movement.

You were taken to the hospital, your mother sitting in the ambulance car beside you. There was a bit of hope in you then, maybe she would care that her daughter had gotten hurt. But her eyes were dull, and her face was turned away. You should’ve known not to expect comfort from her.

They set you on a wheelchair, the chair jerking as they turn the corners until you’ve reached a room. You’re about to fall over, gripping the bars of the wheelchair in desperation. Turns out you needed immediate surgery, the nurses bringing you to another room for the surgeon to begin the process.

You wish you didn’t wake up after, that the sedative didn’t wear off until later. Waking up, you felt worse than before, head and body aching. Bruises lined your legs, arms, confusing you when you see them. You had rubbed them, thinking it was some sort of dye but no, the skin was tender.

The nurses explained the situation once they’ve noted you had woken up. Your mom had an episode, and you come to realize the marks are from her doing. You didn’t call off, or somehow hit your leg when they wheeled you back from surgery. Your mother didn’t let go of you even after the nurses tried to pry her off, she her pulled your body onto the ground. Tears were on her face as she yelled, spewing nothing but words full of hatred. The summary of her hatred speech was that she kept on saying how much you were a mistake.

This was when your brother took care of you, seeing as your mother got arrested. He had to graduate college early, settling for an associates and rushing to find a job to take care of the both of you. Him and his girlfriend watched over you once you got released from the hospital, checking in on you often but you were often a blank slate.

It was difficult to get anything from you, but they respected your space. Your brother might not of been present but he felt the situation had happened with how somber you were.

Healing physically took a few months, but healing mentally has taken years. You couldn’t look at anything she had, fearing it would make you remember her presence. You wanted to forget about her, go about as normal but it was difficult to do so. Your brother meant well, trying to assist you with finding a job. He did networking, telling this he worked with that you were looking for a job until he got a few offers. When the hospital cleared you of your crutches, you were able to begin working.

Years passed by. Your brother got married, even had a kid on the way. With time came space. You don’t feel like you’ve healed from the past, the crook in your foot being a constant reminder—but you feel separated. You’re reminded of her, sometimes your emotions would escalate, sometimes the emotions would result in you trying to skate, trying to act like your past didn’t happen.

There was one night where you pushed yourself too hard, attempting to spin and landing on your knees. You nearly avoided landing on your leg, just close to loosing the privilege of being able to run, swim, or skate. Your brother was aware, seeing how you’ve begun to limp again in the mornings.

He was there for you, standing near whenever he sensed you’ve begun to separate yourself. His wife did as well, laying a hand on your lap in comfort. Tyler did too after having witnessing a moment. He was only six, tears in his eyes as he watched you cry over a toy he brought you. He didn’t understand much, but he hugged you. As he’s grown older, he still doesn’t know the full extent of your trauma, but he worries over you, asking often whenever he notices your eyes have begun to cloud.

Wanda does too. Even now as she’s listening to your story, body laid under you as she rubs your body in comfort. You felt comfortable enough to share, feeling asked to almost as you’ve grown closer with her. It’s the first time you’ve ever told the story to someone other than your family. She has tears in her eyes once you’ve finished, turning to look back at her after hearing her let out a shaky sigh.

She pulled you back against her chest, “I’ll never forgive her,” she says into your neck, arms wrapping around your waist.

“Sorry about that… I gave such a long story.”

“Don’t apologize. I asked and wanted to hear. I’m sorry you went through that, nobody should.”

“What about you,” you ask and she sounds confused, “your story. How’d you get into hockey?”

“It’s not like your story.”

She had gotten into hockey later in high school, doing so apparently to enamor and win over some girl from her school. She succeeded, handing her a flower after her game, asking her to prom. She remembers the time in a positive light, stating that ithe first few dates were eye opening for her.

The girl had cheated after a few months of them dating, not saying anything to Wanda after she had walked in on her lying under a stranger. To get back at her she began to sleep around, earning her a title that she would have never wanted a few years back. She fell into her title, stating that she would sleep with someone and leave them right after. Love confessions were denied, invitations to dates went ignored. Her bed sheets often didn’t smell like her, random strangers lying slept in it more than she did.

You laughed when she said that she didn’t stop her phase until she had met you. She had her eyes set on another woman at the time. It changed after meeting you. The title she had following her around? She wanted it to disappear, she wanted to start over.

You laughed but there were tears in your eyes at her confession, “you’re a sap.”

“Hmm, only for you.”

“Why did you continue hockey after breaking up?”

She looks to her jersey hanging on the back of her door, “I joined to impress her but I stayed because I liked the sport and I made friends on the team.

It was silent for a second before she spoke again, “it also gave me a reason to leave class when we had games or if I got hurt.”

“How’d you get hurt?”

“I broke my nose, got into a fight with another player after I realized they were the one my ex cheated on me with.”

“That’s hot.”

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emyladia · 5 days

Text

Winter Break... | L. Nr

pairing : lando norris x f!reader

summary : Booking a cottage in the moutains for winter break wih your friends sounds like a good idea. I mean it could have been, but with lando around this was meant for trouble.

genre : fluff, slightly suggestive

warning : cursing, pretty sure that's all

a/n : This was just so fun to write, great request I hope this is what was expected and that you'll all enjoy it. Loving the winter vibe even close to the summer. The end is kinda shitty but don't mind it please. 'So american' is totally an alternative title.

Pietra's idea of booking a cottage sounded so great at first. This was a great way to spend time with your closest friends and enjoy winter holliday.

Until you realised what it actually meant, that meant close proximity h24 with Lando Norris.

You were Pietra's bestfriend and he was Max's bestfriend so you were used to spend time together, but if it wasn't for your friends you would already have ripped his head off of his body.

The guy was everything you hate, cocky, provoking, immature.

Saying he was not a big fan of yours was an euphemism. He hated you just as much as you hated him.

You were always trying to put on the best behavior when you were hanging out the four of you but a whole week ? Lost in the woods in the same house as him ?

Now that was something else.

But you couldn't say no.

Not when you had already agreed, and certainly not when Pietra was looking so happy and excited about it.

So here you were, at the back of the car singing to 'So American' by Olivia Rodrigo with your bestfriend, on your way to the mountains, regretting your life choices.

Max was driving, and Lando at the passenger seat was sighing heavily, making well known his annoyment at the two of you.

"What don't you like Olivia Rodrigo ?" Pietra asked Lando when the song was over.

"The problem isn't the song, it's the singers" He answered chuckling a bit.

God you were even hating the sound of his voice at this point. You rolled your eyes and stared at the window.

After a few more time you were finally all at the cottage. It was so lovely, big, all in wood, surrounded by a forest, and it was snowing.

You eyes were shining like a five years old girl, those hollidays were gonna be great with or without Lando.

"Finally smiling ?" The blond girl mocked you nudging your shoulder.

You let out a soft smile. "Sorry, I was just tired, those vacance are gonna be so cool"

She nodded widely at you before running towards the door where Max and Lando were already.

The inside of the house was even better, if it's possible. Every space was huge but yet cosy.

"I love it already" You exclamed happily. You could see that Pietra was as excited as you if it's not more.

"I'm gona check the bedrooms" She clasped her hand at this statement and went immediatly upsatairs.

You followed her letting the lungages to the boys.

When you were finally just on your owns Pietra took a serious face and spoke :

"Let's spend a great time okay ? Please don't fight with Lando"

You rolled your eyes at her comment, but she grabbed your hands insisting.

"Please"

"Fine" You conceed, it's not like you could ever told her no anyways.

You were laying on your bed, scrolling through instagram when you heard a knock on your door.

"Come in" You shouted, too lazy to actually move your ass and opened the door yourself.

The door creacked opened to a loving blond head.

"Hey Pietra what do you want ?" You questionned her putting your phone down?

"Max and I are going to town, I just wanted to let you know." She told you smiling.

"To town ?" You furrowed your eyebrow "But the closest town is one hour away from here"

"Yeah I know but we don't have marshmallows, how am I supposed to ugly cry on rom-coms without a hot chocolate with marshmallows ??" She said acting like a total drama.

You laughed loudly at her childlish behavior. "You're seriously making a two hours trip for marshmallows ?"

"Yes and ?"

"And Max is coming with you ? Dang, that boy is in love" You joked.

"I know right ? Anyways try not to fight too much with Lando" She warned you before exiting the room, letting you alone with your thoughts again.

They had left about twenty minutes ago when you decided to went downstairs.

You were still in the stairs when you noticed him, he was on the couch watching some emission about food on the TV.

Be friendly you remembered yourself, as you put on a smile and sat on the couch too (but the farther away possible from him).

"What you're watching ?" You asked him, trying to make conversation.

"Don't really know... Something about food" He replied not looking away from the screen.

Well this was starting well... Why was everything so awkward between the two of you, you couldn't help but thought.

He clearly wasn't in a mood to talk to you, not that he ever had been, so you just kept it shut and watched the TV too.

The silence between you and Lando was deafening, each passing moment filled with an uncomfortable tension that seemed to hang in the air like a heavy cloud.

You couldn't shake the feeling of unease, the knowledge that you were alone with the one person you couldn't stand.

As you watched the TV together in silence, you couldn't help but steal glances at Lando out of the corner of your eye.

Despite your animosity towards him, you couldn't deny that there was something undeniably attractive about him, from the way his jawline was perfectly chiseled to the way his eyes sparkled with mischief.

But as quickly as those thoughts entered your mind, you pushed them aside, reminding yourself of all the reasons why you couldn't stand him : He was arrogant, cocky, and infuriatingly immature, and the last thing you wanted was to be alone with him in the middle of nowhere.

When you opened your eyes, the sky was already dark. You had fell asleep while watching the TV.

You rubbed your eyes and blinked a few time trying to adjust to the sudden light.

Lando wasn't on the couch and the TV was now off but you were hearing some noise coming from the kitchen so it was probably him.

You checked your phone, it was past 8 P.M.

Have you really slept that much ? You couldn't believe it, but the dark sky out there was telling you otherwise.

You headed to the kitchen to find Lando cooking something, you couldn't help but notice that you didn't knew that he was able to cook.

"Hey, have you seen Pietra ?" You asked him.

He turned away from the fryin pan to look at you right in the eyes. You hated it, or you were loving it, you didn't know, god what were you even thinking at this point ?!

There was just something about his eyes, they seemed so truthfull and yet full of mischief.

"They haven't come back yet" He answered before turning back again focusing on his recipe.

You frown immediatly "What do you mean they haven't come back ?"

He sigh visibly annoyed to be cut off again in the middle of cooking esoecially for a stupid question like that.

"I mean they're not home"

"But they have to be" You insisted and it seems to pissed him off even more.

"They are not. What is so wrong with your brain that you can't understand a simple sentence ?" He said harshly.

You got a bit taken aback by his behavior, you still haven't fight yet and it was kinda nice for once to just discuss like normal people. But it looks like it's done now.

"Cmon it's past 8, they should be here since at least one hour" You continued cause you were getting worried now.

"It's already 8 ?!" He was looking confused now, and a bit worried too.

You ran toward the entrance while dialing Pietra's number. Outside the parking area was still empty, but where the hell where they ?

And of course she wasn't answering the damn phone. You called again, but max this time, one ring... two... three...

"Yes ?"

You sighed from relief. "Where are you it's already past 8, did something happened ?"

Max stayed silent for a few second... "Well you should talk with Pietra, I swear it wasn't my idea" He told you, and you could heard that he was feeling sorry in his voice.

But what the hell was he sorry for ? And what the hell was he talking about ?

"Heyyyy Y/n !" Your bestfriend told you in an awkward manner. And suddenly you weren't worry at all anymore, you were even starting to be a little pissed off... Something wasn't clear.

"P ? What have you done ?" You snapped at her.

"I'm sorry" She immediatly blurted out. "I know you'll be mad but it's gonna be good for the two of you staying a bit together. You'll see you'll even grew closer maybe ? And I know that you're acting like you hate him but you most definitly don't hate him at all-"

What. The. Hell.

Between the blond saying nonsense and Lando now standing in front of you in the hallway waiting for news, you were feeling overwhelmed.

"Pietra what the fuck are you talking about ? When are you coming back ?" You cut her off.

"We're not"

"What ?"

"We're not coming back, it's you and him, cmon I know for sure you think he's cute. You can lie to yourself but not to me I have seen the way you look at him when you think no one is looking"

"Bullshit"

"No it's not, if you could just consider it you would se-" You hang up on the phone too nagry to continue talking to her anymore.

She had trapped you, into being locked up with goddamn Lando cause she thought you had a crush on him ???

Life is not a damn rom-com.

"Should've have known fucking marshmallows were bullshit" You mumbled.

You stormed out off the room, going upstairs to your room when Lando stopped you midtrack. Like it was not already shitty, he was the last person you wanted to see right now.

"So ?" He questionned you. Your brow furrowed.

"What ?"

"When are they coming back ? Are they alright ? And what about marshmallows ?"

"Well they're totally fine yeah and no they're not coming back, cause we're apparently two fools locked up in a nice cottage in the middle of nowhere" You immediatly escaped him and throw yourself on your bed after that.

Lando wasn't stupid, he would probably understand by himself wha was happening.

You hadn't left your room since the call, and it was probably pretty late now.

Now that you were less angry, you had thought about it, maybe it could be okay all you had to do was keep ignoring Lando like you had done this evening.

The house was nice and the landscaped was beautiful, nothing shoudl stopped you from enjoying it.

You were still thinking about your little scheme to avoid Lando as much as possible when you heard a knock on your door.

You got up and opened it, without much suprised Lando was standing in front of it, a plate in his hands.

"Can I come in ?"

"Oh yeah sure" Mission avoid Lando : end now.

He smiled, visibly relieved that didn't slam the door on his face and entered the room. He put the plate on the desk before turning towards you.

The room was only lit up by your the lamp on your nighstand, and the little golden reflection on his face was making his skin glow.

He was pretty for sure. Saying otherwise would be lying.

"I made dinner but you kinda looked like you needed a bit of space so here it is" He told you pointing towards the plate.

"Since when are so nice ? It's not poisoned it is ?" You looked at him suspicioulsy.

He chuckled at your comment and god you just wanted to took that sound and keep it close to you forever. What the hell were you even thinking, what Pietra had said was really starting to get to your head now.

"I'm not always the bastard you try to make me look like" He just answered, that damn smile still plastered on his face.

"Whatever" I shrugged.

"So you're gonna eat or what" He asked you cocking an eyebrow.

"Oh yeah right I'm starving. What about you ?" It was all so strange, talking to Lando like that, like you were actually friends... You were kinda liking the sound of it.

"Well, I've already eat, it's pretty late you know" You glanced at your phone and it was past 10 P.M.

"Oh right... Yeah" And awkward silence fell between the two of you as you took your plate and sat on your bed to eat.

He started to move towards the door to let you eat in peace, and probably head to his bedroom. Perfect everything was coming to sense again maybe the mission : avoid Lando wasn't a lost cause after all.

"Could you stay ?" Who had said that ? Cause that could not be you, not in a million time in the world you could have possibly asked Lando to stay with you willingly.

He froze so you added immediatly "If you want cause I mean if you dan't want to it's okay, like I would understand. I mean we're really that close so maybe that's weird but it's I thought maybe you know. And eating alone is really sad but like you don't actually have to stay if you don't want. I don't want to force you-"

"Woaw slow down there" He chuckled a bit. You sigehd of frustration, now you were rambling. Just what was wring with you ?

He was probably thinking that you were completly crazy now.

But Lando wasn't looking at you like someone who's crazy, his eyes were soft and he was smiling fondly at you.

He sat down next to you and you both talked while you eat, actually even after. You have never talked so long with Lando, but everything just looked so easy.

When he finally left to get to his room you find yourself replying the evening and smiling like an idiot.

No. Absolutly no way.

You slapped yourself mentally, you couldn't have a crush on Lando that was ridiculous. You were hating him.

Okay maybe not anymore but you two could never be more than friends. Not possibly he was a lady's man, no string attached, f1 driver, flying acroos the world.

And you were... You. Hopeless romantic, who spended her night reading and listening to Olivia Rodrigo.

You and Lando was a total nonsense, and would never happened.

When you woke up the next morning and in the process of going downstairs bumped into a shirtless Lando mumbling a "Morning" with a sleepy voice you undertood that you were screwed.

You had spend the next day ignoring him as much as you can. You couldn't let yourself fell for him like that.

So everytime he wanted to talked to you or spent time with you, you were making excuses.

And here you were again, pretending to be too focused on your book to joined him watching a movie. Actually that was half true, cause your book was really good.

The two protagonists were about to kiss for the first time when Lando bursted into your room. You nearly jumped out of your bed.

"What happened to knocking ?"

He completly ignored your remark and throw himself on your bed.

"Did I do something ?"

"What no ?"

"What are you avoiding me then?"

"I am not" You lied, and he gave a look, the you-don't-fool-me-with-your-bullshit look.

You avoid his gaze feeling a bit guilty, he sighed and dropped the subject but he was looking... Almost hurt ?

"What are you reading" He asked poiting toward the book you were still holding.

A blushed crept to you cheeks, you knew their was nothing to be ashamed about reading romance novel but still. "Nothing" You hid your book in your back.

"Cmon" He smirked trying to get the book from behind you.

Dammit that stupid man that has way more strenght than you. He eventually ended up catching it and start reading the page where your bookmark was.

"Her eyes were shining with desire as he was pinning her against the wall. He wanted her so bad and deep down he knew that she wanted him just as much..."

"Oh my god stop" You shouted basically jumping on the bed to get your book back but Lando rolled on the other side of the bed.

"But they couldn't get lost in their desire, they were enemies, people who despised each other. And yet the only thought that crossed their minds at the moment was one lustfull" He continued to read out loud.

"Okay really stop that is embarassing" You finally managed to take the book back.

He pouted as you closed the novel and put it on your nightstand.

"Hey, I want to know if they kiss" The curly haired boy spoke.

"Stop mocking me" You hid your fac efrom embarassment.

"I'm serious" You were expecting a laugh, that you could've handled. Mockery, and snarky remarks, that was somethong you knew and you could support.

But him, with that serious look, truly interessed in your stupid romance novel. No that was too much for your heart.

"Really ?" You finally met his eyes, so sincere in that exact moment. He simply nodded.

You sighed before taking the book back. "Okay but don't read at loud please, let's read it... Together ? Just tell me when you've finished the page"

He smiled brightly and sat next to you as you both started reading.

At first it was uncomfortable and awkward to read like that but as time pass you both grew more comfortable and it wasn't so bad reading with him.

It felt so intimate... Being pressed next to Lando so you can both look at the pages, but yet you weren't hating it. Not at all actually, and that was kinda scaring you.

When the dark had became too dark for you to read, you decided that it was time to stopped. Lando groaned about it, he only shut up when you promised him that you could read again the next day.

"I don't know about you but I start getting hungry" He told you.

"Hmmm... I can cook tonight but I can only make grilled cheese sandwich" You laughed a little.

"Like in 'anyone but you'" He commented and you turned to faced him.

"You know the movie ?" Your eyes were wide.

"There's a lot you don't know about me" He winked at you before rolling out of bed and heading towards the kitchen.

You followed him still confused. He was right, there was so much you didn't knew about him, he was nothing like you thought he would be.

You cooked and then you ate together and he burned himself cause he didn't wait to eat. And you laughed, you laughed so much this evening your cheeks were hurting.

When you got to bed you were more confused than te night before but you were sure of one thing : Lando Norris was bad for your heart.

You hadn't answered any text from Pietra since the call, you weren't mad anymore but she gad tricked you, so you could at least do that to get back on her.

The location was for a week, you had been there for now 6 days and your little crush for Lando hadn't stop growing.

You had both read, a lot actually, played chess, throew snowballs at each other, watched movies, talked and more.

You knew that when you were gonna leave this cottage everything will became like before, but just thinking about it was hurting you. You weren't sure you were able to hate him anymore.

Being now Lando's friend also means discovered a whole new side of him, like the fact that he was extremely touchy-feely. It's not that you were hating it, in fact you were loving it a bit too much.

"What are you thinking about ?" The boy asked you, you were reading and you haven't turned a single page in 10 minutes.

"Nothing much just got lost in my thought" You answered him smiling weakly.

He looked at you like he didn't believed a single you said, but he did'nt push it more and simply nodded.

"Wanna see something fun ?" You turned to him intrigued.

"What are you thinking about ?"

"Do you trust me?" He looked at you straight into your eyes.

You nodded. He smiled and took your hand leading you downstairs. His warm hand in yours felt so great, you wished you could kept the feeling forever.

It was already dark oustide so when he told you put on your shoes and coat as he did the same you hesitated a second. Maybe he was about to murder you in that dark forest.

A bit dramatic maybe.

But you never know.

After coming to the conclusion that the idea was ridiculous and that he could've had killed you countless times if he wants, you did as he told you.

"Okay close your eyes" You frown but he only waited for you to do so, so you finally closed your eyes.

He led you outside, you heard the snow creacked under your footsteps. After a few more steps and spoke again :

"Okay opened them now"

As you were looking around you, you realised that you were right in front of the cottage in the middle of the snow, you looked at him confused.

"Up" He told you pointing towards the stars.

And that's when your jaw dropped, the sky was fulled of stars, so bright, that was the prettiest things you ahd ever seen in your life.

"Woaw" Was all you managed to say you were like a child in front of christmas present.

"This is beautiful" You murmured amazed.

"Yes it is" He said looking right at you.

You couldn't helped but laughed "God lando that line is old like the world, you can do better than that" He laughed with you.

You both sat on the porch to looked at the stars comfortably.

"What do you see?" He said poiting towards the sky.

You thought a little bit before answering. "Right there you can clearly see a gun, and those stars here 15 feet away are forming Mcdonald's logo"

"God you're so american" He chuckled. At those words your heart beat a little faster, you were getting stupid, no he wasn't quoting...

"And before you ask, yes I'm quoting Olivia Rodrigo"

Oh god you cheeks were on fire now, actually no, your whole body.

"I thought you hated her" You said him clearing your throat that was suddenly really dry.

"Wrong she's kinda right, I do laugh at all your jokes and I would like if you'd come everywhere I'd go" He confessed.

Now quoting the whole chorus, you were melting right in front of him, how could he said such things this easily ?

"Don't do that" You warned him, it was snowing, how could you be so hot right now ?

"That what ?"

"You know what I mean"

He smiled fondly at you before getting up.

"Alright american girl, let's go to sleep"

You both head back inside and as he deposed you to your room, you realised you didn't want him to go, not now. Not when tomorrow you would had to leave this place and all the moments you shared behind.

"You want to come inside ? To... Chat a bit ?" You sugggested to him visibly embarassed.

His eyes widened and you wonder if maybe you shouldn't have said that but he smiled and agreed.

You were both sitting on your bed, the room deadly silent, none of you daring to speak first.

"Listen-"

"I've wanted to-"

"You go first" He told you.

"No you really, please"

"Okay, so... What did I need to do?"

"Sorry ?" You where caught off guard by his question.

"What can I do for you to finally look at me like i look at you?"

He was supposed to clarified himself with that sentence but you were just even more confused.

He groaned in front of your lack of reaction "Cmon, don't get me wrong I enjoyed it, but why do you think I would read romance and watched rom-com everyday ?? And actually learned lyrics of an Olivia Rodrigo song ?"

"Cause you liked them ?" He gave you a look that really said "Seriously ?"

"I don't know cause of your really sensible heart ?"

"Y/n..." He sighed at how clueless you were acting.

"I just don't know !" You shouted feeling lost and overwhelmed.

"You do know, you just don't want to admit it" He shouted back and you hated how right he was just now.

You send a death glare at him and as you were both staring at each other pupils you were hating so much. Oh god so much, he was freaking annoying.

How could you've had forgotten that.

That's why when he put a hand on your cheek and crahsed his lips on yours you put your arms around his neck and pulled him even closer.

Wait... What ?

You were kissing Lando. Everything was perfectly fine you were kissing Lando. OH. MY. GOD.

The kiss was rough and hungry, like he had wait for so long to do just that. Lando's lips were moving against yours but you wanted so much more.

Apparently him too, because at the second you opened your mouth a bit to gave him access he deepened the kiss. After what felt like an eternity but yet not enough he backed away a little from the kiss to breathed.

"Well..." He started but you cut him off. "Shut up"

You pulled him back into another kiss and god he wasn't complaining at all. Your lips were feeling so great against his, right were they belong.

His eyes widened when you pulled on the hem of his shirt. "Are you sure ?"

"Never been surer in my life" You replied tossing his shirt away in the room. He didn't waste anymore time "Can I ?" he asked his hands on the hem of your shirt.

"Sure, do whatever you want" He took off your shirt of you and started roaming your body with his hands.

"You really shouldn't say things like this."

Before you could replied his lips collapsed again with yours. That was a feeling he could never get used to, his favorite in the world, his lips on your lips.

When you opened your eyes the next morning you're welcolmed by two eyes, and what beatiful eyes, staring at you.

"You're creepy" You chuckled while hiding your face in the crook of his neck.

"And you're gorgeous, morning beautiful" He told you with a sleepy voice, and you were loving that voice. This was definitly the best night you've ever had in your life.

"Morning" You said back snuggling a bit closer to him.

"I love you"

You're sleepiness disappear instantly at his words and you pushed yourslef on your elbows to look at him eyes widened.

"I'm sorry, that was really fast and-" He started apologizing, but you cut him with a chast kiss.

"I love you too Lan" You whispered like it was a secret.

And he smiled, the brightess smile you've had ever seen on his face.

"We should probably get up and make our suitcase" He suggested, and got you just wanted to stay all day long in this bed with him, but he was right.

Max and Pietra woulod probably came soon.

When their car parked on the driveway Lando and you were already in front of the cottage your suitcases in hand. You both seat in the back of the car.

As you and Lando gave your heart out on 'So american' by Olivia Rodrigo, Pietra and Max exchange a look.

"Looks like it works out at the end" She said and he just smiled at her agreeing.

#hi there #f1 #lando norris #f1 x reader #ff #formula 1 #formula one #imagine #i love them #i love him #norris #lando x reader #lando #funny

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skylarsblue · 1 month

Text

★RDR2 Incorrect Quotes★

(If you see duplicates from my COD version of these? Shh, no you didn't) ★Border made by @fairytopea★

Ms.Grimshaw What are you doing, you oaf? Young!Arthur, staring at Y/N: They’re pretty. Ms.Grimshaw …and you’re ugly, now get back to work.

- (Pre-joining the gang) Abigail, trying to get paid: What’s your favorite color, John? John: Blue. No, green. Abigail: Awesome! I love learning about you. John: I fucked up, it’s yellow.

- Arthur, cutting a huge knot out of John’s hair: I fucked up, we gotta go bald. *head locks him still* Young!John, flailing violently: WAAAAAHHHH-

Seán: Psst, Lenny, ay mate, wake up! Lenny: Huh- Wh-what? What is it? Seán: I heard something outside the tent. Lenny: What? Seán: Like a woman crying in the distance, but I couldn’t hear her footsteps. Lenny: Okay?? What do you want me to do? Seán: Come look with me! Lenny: Hell no! Seán: Why not? Lenny: I got too much melanin and too much sense for that white people shit. You wanna let demons get you, be my guest, leave me out of it.

- (John HAD to have SOMETHING that captivated her, for humor’s sake? We’ll say he had jokes)

Abigail: You have to find my darling husband, I’m so worried about him. Arthur: Seriously, what do you see in that guy? Abigail: He makes me laugh.

- Micha: I've got the urge to say something. Arthur: And what's that? Micha: The N-Word- Arthur: WHOA-

- Bill: But seriously, is it your whole emo thing that she’s into or what? John: …yeah, long flowing straight hair, very emo.

- Karen: This- Hmm. Tilly: Be nice. Karen: I’m findin’ it. Mary-Beth: …it takes you that long to find- Karen: It does, it does.

- (O’Driscoll troubles) Kieran: Arthur we’re going to get murdered. We’re going to get murdered by a man who can’t tie a fucking bow tie. Arthur: At least he won’t torture us, can’t tie a rope either.

- John: Ugh, you know they’re gonna make us do one of those tacky family happiness photos that comes in the restaurants shitty frame. Tilly: Why are you so fucking negative all the time? John: Wh- uh- I just- Arthur: *slowly sucks tea through straw*

- Seán: Someone just said; “You’re a criminal!” Seán: *handkerchief on, gun in one hand, bag of money in the other* Seán: Well I’ll tell ya what, Sherlock Holmes. You are unbelievable.

- The Gang: Arthur is dying and Micha is a rat! Dutch, dancing with money: *insert that audio that goes “I don’t give a fuck cause I’m a ✨millionaire✨, I do what I want, middle finger in the air!”*

- John, drunk: You think the wind is ever tryna tell us something and we don’t know how to hear it anymore? Charles, loading up a drunk Arthur into a wagon: I just want you to stop saying odd shit.

- Abigail: If we lose, I’m gonna cut the judge. John: Wh- you brought your switchblade?? Abigail: Mhm. John: But they patted us down on the way in, where did you hide i- ohhhhhhh.

- Arthur: …you ever wish you could just, turn into a bird and fly away from everything? Charles: I think we need to get you to a therapist for depression. John: I’d wanna be a wolf. Charles: And we should get you psych evaluation for Autism.

- Sheriff: You seem like a reasonable and good natured person. Arthur: *looks around* And you look like you need glasses.

- Abigail: What would your father say?! Jack: Uhhh “I’ll fix it!” And then make it worse until luck comes around and makes it work, and then act like that was the plan the whole time? Abigail: …that’s my bad, I should’ve used a different phrase to express my disappointment.

- (I dunno why but John being super mean to some people is so fucking funny to me. I don't hate Bill, but bullying him is fun)

Bill: You enjoyin’ the wife everyone else paid to have? John: You mean the woman I never had to pay for? The woman who liked me so much, she didn’t ask for any money to sleep with me? In fact; she liked me so much, she married me? The woman who makes me a warm dinner and kisses me everyday? Mother of my child? John: I am enjoyin’ yeah. What about you, Bill? Bill: John: You enjoyin’ your lonely life, you unlovable sorry sack of shit? You enjoyin’ having to pay for someone to pretend they like you? Cause they never actually do. They hate you actually, like me. I hate you. Eat shit and die, Bill.

- Arthur: …him? Really? Mary-Beth Don’t be mean! Arthur: He looks like a rescue dog, Mary-Beth. Mary-Beth: I know, I like that! Arthur: ….you like that?? Mary-Beth: His pathetic wet eyes and general wimpy stature have captivated me. Arthur: *sigh* Whatever makes you happy.

- Bill: At the end of the day, Arthur. I am a MAN. Arthur: A MAN WHO’S GAY. You like fellers GETTHATTHROUGHYOURHEAD!

- Dutch: I have a plan. Hosea: You haven’t planned shit. Dutch: I’ve planned it.

- Hosea: Arthur! What on earth are you doing?! Young!Arthur: Getting rid of this demon. Young!John: *screeching and trying to get out of Arthur’s grip* Hosea: And why do you plan to get rid of him? Arthur: Because, Hosea! He woke me up by leaning over me and whispering, “I know what death feels like, it’s cold. Have you felt death?” Arthur: HE’S CLEARLY EVIL, HOSEA Hosea: That’s just how children are, Arthur. Dutch: He’s right son, put the boy down. Dutch, leaning and whispering to Hosea: But maybe we should buy a Bible just in case. Hosea: And a cross.

- (Modern au and suicide joke)

John: It’s not a phase! It’s a lifestyle, you just wouldn’t get it! Arthur: You think I didn’t go through the “I can’t tell if I want to kill myself or everyone around me” phase? Come on. John: What? I don’t wanna kill myself at all. Arthur: … John: … John: Should I- should we go talk to Hose- Arthur: We should forget this conversation happened. Take this Nirvana CD and keep your mouth shut.

- Abigail: …John. John: Yes, my angel? Abigail: You forgot something. John: No I didn’t! I took the list with me, checked it three times, even crossed things off when I put it in the cart! See, look. Apples, frozen hamhocks, cranberry juice- Abigail: John. You took Jack with you. John: Abigail: John: Abigail: John: SHIT I LEFT HIM BY THE PASTA SECTION Abigail: STOP STANDING THERE AND GO GET HIM!

- Jack: Pa, how did you get mom to marry you? John: Well son, I- John: John: I have no idea. Jack: Should I ask mom? John: I’ll be honest, I don’t think she knows the answer either.

- Charles: You did good back there. Arthur: Oh? Heh, nah, you did all the fancy stuff. I just helped. Charles: Don’t undersell yourself, Arthur. I wouldn’t be complimenting you for no reason. Arthur: Oh yeah? And here I thought you were just trying to fluff up my ego. Charles: Wouldn’t hurt to do when you work so hard, no? Arthur: Now you’re just being’ sweet- John: Can y’all wait til we’re done before you start your spiritual dick sucking? Arthur: Can you repent to the lord fast enough to save your soul in the time it’ll take me to throw you into the damn ocean, Marston?!

- Arthur: Do you even have a brain? John: Do you even have someone that loves you? Arthur: John: John: I heard it that time, I’m sorry. Arthur: This is what Abigail hears sometimes, just so you know. John: I heard it that time, I got it. I- I’ll just- Arthur: Whiskey, full bottle. The nice kind. John: Apology alcohol, got it.

NPC: My husband’s parents are so crazy. In-laws always are, huh? Abigail: Well, uh-

*John being an orphan* *John’s adoptive dads being criminals, one particularly off his rocker*

Abigail: ….aha, yeah;;

- Abigail: John Marston, you useless, foolish, stupid man! Bill: To hell with John! Abigail, suddenly with a very large gun: NO ONE INSULTS MY HUSBAND.

- Arthur, holding up a proper painting he actually put time and effort into: Could a depressed person make this? Charles: The painting: *a wolf in the rain laying it’s head over the body of a deer shot with an arrow* Charles: I’m, in fact, more convinced you have depression now. Arthur: …yeah this wasn’t the best evidence for my argument, huh? Charles: No. Not at all.

- John: What are you talking about? That’s completely normal, it’s like having opinions. just cause it doesn’t happen to you doesn’t mean- Tilly: No, John! No. It’s not normal to have that reaction to the sound of hearing metal on metal. John: No look, uh- Arthur! Arthur come here! Arthur: What now? John: What happens when you hear metal on metal? Like, a can bein’ rubbed with a knife. Arthur: Ugh, I hate that sound. It makes my damn skin crawl, like I got beetles underneath. Makes me wanna skin myself to get’em out. John: Right! See, Tilly? It’s not just me! Tilly: ????

Charles: …and you never got them evaluated? Hosea: In hindsight, an autistic diagnosis probably would’ve made more things make sense. But, what can ya do.

- Arthur after a dog didn’t positively react to him: Maybe this is my final straw. Charles: No. Arthur: It might be. Charles: It’s one dog. There are twenty that you stopped to pet along the way here, plenty more for you to pet after this. Arthur: You don’t understand, this is devastatin’. Charles: Arthur, please- Arthur: Utterly devastatin’, Charles.

- Arthur, tipsy: Just cause you’re gorgeous don’t mean I’ma do whatever you say. Charles: Drink the water, Arthur. Arthur: *grabs the glass* Yes, sir.

- (Got a Y/N one, also, modern Au)

Arthur: That’s the Aberdeen farm. Y/N: …what’s wrong with it? Arthur: What’cha mean? Y/N: The vibes, they’re off. Arthur: …the…vibes? Y/N: The energy, Mister Morgan. The vibe of the place. They’re off, they’re weird, wack even. I sense insidious and wretched wavelengths wafting from the aura of that property. Arthur: I see…well, to answer your question, it’s cause they are weird. And I ain’t even confirmed why cause I don’t really wanna know. Y/N: I see you can also sense the vibes are rank. Arthur: …sure, whatever that means.

- Micha: Well I think- Y/N: Well I’m certain no one fucking asked, Micha! Not a single damn person asked what the hell you thought, ever! In fact, I’m pretty sure you don’t think. I’m pretty sure your skull fills with all the bullshit in your organs, and it just spills out your mouth! Micha: Micha: I- Y/N: Shut up, Micha!

- Arthur, after Albert explains some super dangerous plan in order to get wild animals near him to photograph: You’re stupid, I like that in a man.

- Y/N: Bye Arthur, bye Karen, bye Hosea, bye Arthur. Sadie: You said ‘bye Arthur’ twice. Y/N: I like Arthur.

- NPC: Lovebirds, eh? Sadie: Arthur: Sadie: I’d rather eat a poison ivy plant with Holly Berries for dressing. *looks at Arthur* No offense. Arthur: No no, none taken. All things considered, I’d rather dive into a pit of tar and then drag myself face first through a plain of rotten chitlins. Sadie: Completely fair!

- Bill: I need you to realize you ain’t in charge here. Y/N: I need you to realize I don’t give a shit.

- Arthur: Hey Charles, uh, I got an Uhm…a spiritual question. Charles: Any particular reason you chose to ask me? Arthur: Uh well- I didn’t mean for it to be like that- I just- Charles: *sigh* What is it? Arthur: Do you know what it means when an elk stands up on its back legs? Charles: That means- Charles: WE SHOULD LEAVE, we need to leave, that’s what that means!

- Jack: …why are your boobs so big? Charles: They’re not boobs. Jack: Do you have to wear a brasier? Charles: *sigh* Arthur: He asked me the same thing a couple weeks ago, don’t think to hard bout it.

(Story spoilers!!) Y/N: I'm sorry, let me get this straight. Y/N: You picked up that man when he was a destitute child, grieving and starving. Taught him almost everything he knows. Y/N: Then, you did that with, what? Three others? In similar circumstances? Y/N: Created a sense of family and community, a strong bond between so many misfortuned people. With your trustworthy long term friend by your side. Y/N: And then. Y/N: One RAT. WHO IS OPENLY ANTAGONISTIC AND REEKS OF SUSPICION AS MUCH AS HE DOES HORSE SHIT, SOMEHOW CONVINCES YOU TO GO OFF YOUR ROCKER AND HARM YOUR GANG?! Y/N: Explain! Dutch: Dutch: Dutch: He praised me- Y/N: YOUR PRAISE KINK GOT YOU TO AIM A GUN AT YOUR SONS????

- Arthur: Naaah they’re an angel. Lenny: They punched Bill in the face. Seán: They told Strauss he was a waste of human material, in his own language, which they’re not fluent in. Mary-Beth: They framed Micha for a crime and got him put in prison again. Arthur: Like I said, an angel!

- John: Woman. (Translation: Darling.) Abigail: Moron. (Translation: Lovebug.)

Arthur: You tellin’ me they’re being affectionate right now? Jack: Can’t’cha read subtext, Uncle Arthur? Arthur: ???

(Insert Alcohol is truth serum reference)

Drunk Bill: Not to be gay, but you’re gorgeous bro. Kieran, afraid: You don’t have to be gay to appreciate a man’s beauty. Absolutely shit-faced Bill: Nah, like I’d fuck you, bro. Kieran, terrified: Okay, never mind!

- (How I imagine their first couple years together went)

Dutch: Dutch: Dutch: Dutch: How do you feel about me? Hosea, naked & beside him: ….we’re sharin’ a bedroll, Dutch. Dutch: Yes, but what are we, Hosea? Hosea: ….we’re both naked, alone, in a tent, Dutch. Dutch: That doesn’t answer my question. Hosea:

- (This one's sad, not funny, sorry-) John: You’re such a hypocrite, why is it that anything I do that you’ve done before that you get so bent outta shape?! Arthur: Because I’ve done it before you, John. John: So why do you think it’s fair to tell me not to?! Most people are proud when their younger brother ends up like’em. You don’t want anyone like you, is that it? Arthur: John: John: …oh. Arthur: Now that you got my point, will you take my god damn advice without a big fuss…please.

- John: She drives me insane! She somehow managed to make me the angriest I’ve ever been almost daily. NPC: Then leave her. John: The fu- no. What? She’s the wind beneath my wings, my darling wife, my beautiful angel. How the hell could you even think to suggest such a thing? NPC: But- John: Get outta my sight, you fuckin’ disgrace.

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mitch-the-silly · 2 months

Note

Hi I’m new to your blog so I apologize if I requested anything wrong in this ask

Could I request a vox x reader where reader comes crying to vox and as he is trying to comfort her someone walks in which makes him switch up to kind and soft to mean and unfair towards reader at one point even pointing out her insecuritys on accident which makes reader cry more and kinda distance herself from him. How would vox feel and comfort ready after this?

Thanks and have An amazing day!

No no, it's ok! You'll find that I LOVE writing angst. It's honestly my area of expertise. And I LOVED this idea so much that when I was looking through my asks just now, I was like "Eh, lemme go to sleep" but I saw your ask and knew I could afford to sleep a bit later!

Anyway, mean Vox is very much real to me (mayhaps even canon)-

For extra angst, The one to walk in will be Valentino and some other Overlords (but mainly Valentino because I hate his goofy, bald ass).

Vox x fem!reader

Angst!!!

Warnings: Valentino (EWWWW)

"Roses are Made of Thons"

You felt distressed, only one person in this world could console you and you knew it. So you ran to his office and buried yourself in his chest. Your lover, Vox, held you close to him. He was caressing your face with gentle care. He was always so gentle and loving with you, so when he asked you what was wrong and you told him about your sorrows, you confided he’d keep to himself and help you.

“I… I tried my best, and I think I still look terrible! I mean, look at me… I just…” You sniffled, hiccupping from how desperate you were.

“Hey… hey… what did we say? I love you just the way you are. I think you’re cute, you don’t need to try to look good when you already look good.” He spoke, kissing your cheek.

“Really? Are you sure…? I just… I see all the models in your shows… and… I just…” You mumbled, tears threatening to stream down again.

“It’s just a show. And it's meant to appease those dirty fuckers who look like ugly fucking losers with absolutely zero contact with women. It’s not based on my standards…” He reassured you, kissing you again.

However, this would soon be gone, because the door to his office opened without a previous announcement, and storming in came Valentino along with some other overlords. “Ugh, Vox, I need you to settle something- Oh. Are you getting taken care of by your little putita?~” Valentino cooed at him, making fun of your relationship.

You knew he had a thing for Vox, and were very much aware he was salty that Vox had decided to be loyal to you. So it was obvious Valentino hated your guts despite you not really interacting with him.

“It’s nothing important, what do you need?” He smiled, wiping your tears and placing you on his lap. He held your head to his chest, trying to hide your lack of composure.

“Well, look, I had a few drug deals with these two, and I thought you’d paid them but- Vox… why is she moving like that?” Valentino paused, lowering his sunglasses and squinting at you attempting to see better.

“I already told you it was nothing. Are you gonna speak or not?” Vox scoffed, nudging you to stop it.

“She’s distracting me, Vox. Control your bitches or I’ll teach her how I control mine.” Valentino huffed, lighting his cigarette and rolling his eyes.

“Y/n, stop crying, I’m busy right now, go and cry somewhere else please.” Vox spoke, turning towards you, and pushing you off his lap. You tried to wipe your tears, but they kept rolling down your cheek.

Was this really what he was acting like right now? “V-vox but…”

“What is she even bitching about anyway? I bet it’s that outfit she had on. It’s not doing her any favors. I’d cry too if I was in that rag.” Valentino joked cruelly, the other overlords laughed… Vox did too.

“She’s just crying over her not looking good, cut her some slack!” Vox chuckled, and then he turned towards you. “Come on, I’ll get back to you once I’m done with this. Meet me in my room, sweetie.” Vox spoke casually, dismissing you completely.

You couldn’t believe it… he was just shoving you to the side. Giving you the cold shoulder over Valentino and the other overlords… He was making fun of you and even told them the one thing you told him not to say.

You felt hot tears roll down your cheek, and you ran out of the room. Ignoring Vox’s request to wait for him in his room. Matter of fact, you stayed in your own room for a couple of days, sulking, desiring to never see him again after what he’d done to you. You could hear him knock at your door, and try to make amends, but you simply couldn’t bring yourself to open the door.

After a few days, you finally decided to come out of your room. Vox had been watching your hallway’s cameras for the past few days, and the second he spotted you out, he zapped to where you were.

“Y/n! Please! Can we talk?” He asked as you turned away form him, still mad at him.

“Please, I know I acted like an asshole, but… I just… If I showed them a soft side they weren’t gonna take me seriously! My whole business is a fake image of myself! If I don't uphold it, I'm fucked! My whole empire falls apart!” He cried out, almost groveling at your feet.

“You… you didn't have to tell them that about me… what I was insecure about…” You mumbled, tears threatening to creep in again.

“I know! And… I… I’m sorry, I was a fucking idiot and I was just feeding Valentino’s little games. I’m way too used to it, but I… I need to work on it, just please… Please don’t leave me! I fucked up, ok? I’m human, please don’t leave me over something I regret doing!” He pleaded, walking closer to you and taking your hand. Begging you for forgiveness.

“I… I need a bit more time… but… I accept your apology…” You mumbled, looking away. “Don’t do that again…”

“I won’t, I promise! I’ll give you your time, just… please don’t cut me off… The days you didn't talk to me were miserable… Please… I can’t live without you…” He begged.

“I heard you the first time… I’ll text you, don’t worry…” You mumbled back, reentering your room.

It was sort of a win for Vox, but he’d gotten too carried away. He’d already made sure to cuss out Valentino for his behavior. But he really had to get his life together. He just knew that if he pulled another one like this, he’d lose her.

#hazbin vox #hazbin hotel #vox header #hazbin hotel vox #vox x reader #vox angst #vox x reader angst #vox x you #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel angst #hazbin angst #vox is just so bbg i swear #man-child vox is so real #man-child vox #valentino #valentino hate #valentino hazbin hotel

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psychedelic-ink · 1 year

Text

𝑩𝑼𝑹𝑵 𝑭𝑶𝑹 𝑴𝑬

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

genre: smut, angst, dark fic

word count: 3.5k

summary: joel looks after you, provides for you, fucks you until the sun comes up; his only ask is that you never leave his apartment, not willing to face another loss. One day when you find the door unlocked, you decide to take stroll, promising yourself that you'll be back before he returns home.

warnings: canon typical violence, possesive!joel, dark!joel, willing captivity, stockholm syndrome, fear kink, dubious consent, rough sex, piv, mention of fingering, mention of oral, physical assault from a stranger, choking, spanking, thigh fucking, creampie

thank you to @inklore who I have been screaming about joel endlessly and helped me come up with this idea and thank you to my brainwave twin @pedrito-friskito for beta-ing ❤️❤️❤️

The air is a warm caress to your skin.

You feel the flickers of amber licking where your skin shows, the smell of coal and wood heavy. Your nostrils burn at the smell. Your eyes dart around, heart fluttering in your chest in a similar fashion to a curious child. You don’t remember how long it’s been since you’ve been outside of the confinements of Joel’s apartment.

He found you on the brink of death, skin cut up and torn by hunters. You shudder when you remember how effortlessly he scooped you up, swearing never to let you out of his sight. He brought you back to his apartment, cleaned your wounds. You thought he was joking—but he wasn’t. Joel kept you locked up; loving you, providing for you, and reading to you behind closed doors. You were his secret, the embodiment of all the things he missed and craved to feel under his hands once more.

You never said a word. After being shattered and put back by the world over and over it felt good to be looked after. For someone else to think about your well-being without you having to. Your mind screamed at you in your dreams. It whispered that you should leave, escape, that this wasn’t a life to live and that you were a prisoner to the whims of a broken man.

But how could you listen to reason when he filled you up so beautifully?

It was as if he hears your mind racing at night, dragging you away from thoughts by pressing his fingers into you, stroking you until you woke with a cry of pleasure. You would open your eyes to the oddest of hours, either with the hardness of his cock or the sensual glide of his tongue—it didn’t matter, your body would forever crave him, this much you knew.

You don’t think much when you notice that Joel forgot to lock the main door. Pulling on your boots, you slip outside, curious what the world had become while you were drowning in the blissful ignorance he provided. Joel never allowed you to leave, even with him by your side.

You kick a small rock, watching it skip ahead with an almost bored look. It doesn’t take you long to realize that the world is still deep in shit, maybe even more so since Joel took you in. There are more soldiers, more bodies burning, warming the sky. It makes you sick, your stomach rolling uncomfortably as bile raises up your throat and stings your tongue.

“Haven’t seen you before, you lost sweetheart?”

You flinch at the voice. Slowly turning, you see a man with dirty blond hair and an equally dirty beard, he grins at you with yellow teeth. He takes a step forward and you take a step back, you feel your pulse in your throat.

“Don’t be afraid,” he purrs, crowding your personal space with two easy steps. “Why don’t you come with me? We could have some fun. You look lonely,”

“Well, I’m not,” you snap with falsely found confidence. “Leave me alone,”

He clicks his tongue, an ugly snarl curling over his lips. “Such a big mouth on such a pretty thing…I’m not sure I like that,”

A chill settles at the bottom of your spine. You feel two others rounding you, scowling as they circle you like vultures. You swallow, your demeanor softening at the nearing threat.

“I’m not alone,” you croak. “Let me go please,”

The man seems pleased by this. He mulls over what you said, tongue poking the inside of his cheek. With a tilted head he approaches, fingers brushing your cheek.

“I think you’re mistaken,” he hums. “You’re alone, and we’re here to keep you company.”

When the same fingers that touch your cheek move to trace your lips, you bite. Your teeth sink into the boney flesh, hard enough to draw blood, he scurries back with a shout. The other two move forward, and one grabs your nape. “You bitch—” he hisses into your ear.

“Let me go!” you struggle, eyes darting around in hopes to see a god-forsaken soldier but they were none. “Fuck—”

You hurl forward with a punch to your stomach, you nearly empty your stomach all over the concrete. Saliva fills your mouth and you swallow. You feel a painful tug on your hair as your head is forced back. The face of the blond man comes into view, he growls. “You’re gonna fucking regret that,”

Bare knuckles clashes angrily against your cheekbone— again and again. You taste blood. You spit. Between squinted eyes you see red coloring cold gray, your tongue swipes over your bottom lip, tracing the slash your teeth made into it.

“We could’ve had a fun time,” the man mutters. Another blow to your face follows, your eye already feels swollen. “But I don’t feel that charitable anymore.”

Before being buried in darkness, the last thing you think of is Joel. You never should’ve left.

You wake to a gentle touch—two calloused hands cradling your face, thumbs tracing smoothing lines down your face. Your vision is blurred and you can barely see, but the silhouette in front of you is familiar, it smells of home.

“Joel?” you call out wincing at the dryness of your voice. “Is that you?”

Your right eye throbs painfully, warm to the touch, pounding like a beating heart. Joel lets out a breath of relief, his head dropping between his shoulders.

“Thank god,” he mutters, he hooks his arms under your waist and knees, lifting you up from the cold concrete. “What the hell were you thinkin’?”

Warm tears roll down your face and you sniffle, the salt burns your skin. “I’m sorry, Joel,” you whisper. “It—It hurts,”

“I know baby, I know,” he huffs, steps now moving hastily. “I’m going to patch you up, then I’m going to find the fucker who did this to you, alright? Don’t worry. I got you, you’re good, you’re okay…”

You slip in and out of consciousness on the way back home, and when you finally find yourself leaning into the comfort of the couch, you’re still not quite sure what happened.

Joel gently presses a wet rag against your eye. He cleans the caked blood on your lips and the rest of your face. He’s not the best at hiding his anger, with every swipe of fabric, you feel rage curling angrily in his belly. You refuse to look at him. Too afraid that as soon as you make eye contact he’s going to scold you.

Not addressing it makes it worse. Joel grunts, a string of curses following after every dab against your skin.

Suddenly his hand falls to his knee, “Look at me.” he commands and you do. With his flared nostrils, he glares at you, hot iron pressing into your skin. “Why did you leave?”

The skin over his muscles is drawn taut when he asks. You blink quickly, nose wrinkling with the stabbing pain spreading through your swollen eye.

“I was curious,” you say quickly. “I was going to come back but they jumped me—”

“Do I not fuckin’ give you everything?” he shoots up to his feet, startling you. His voice trembles. “I cook for you, feed you, take care of you, and—and you leave?!”

You open your mouth to speak but as soon as you do something whirs past your head and shatters against the wall. Shards of glass sprinkle down the couch. With wide eyes you turn back to look at Joel, he’s hysterical, pacing back and forth, crimson red crawling up from his neck to his cheeks.

“You could’ve fuckin’died if I didn’t find you in time—” he stops, eyes finding yours. He takes a sharp breath and makes his way back to you, sitting on the coffee table. “Fuck look at you. You’re trembling. I’m sorry, I would never hurt you. I was just scared, I can’t bare the thought of losing you,”

Joel pulls you so you’re straddling his lap, large palm cradles the back of your head while the other lays on your waist. You wrap your arms around him, nails digging into the soft fabric of his flannel. Your chest heaves as you try to breathe, your chest aches. You never wanted to hurt him, or get hurt for that matter. Your body feels on the verge of splitting into two, the physical and emotional pain like knives digging into your skin.

“Can you tell me who did this?” he mutters, his voice a low rasp. “Do you know who they are?”

You shake your head as you describe the blond man and his ugly snarl. You tell Joel what the stranger said to you, how many there were of them. His fingers twitch, searing anger floods through his veins.

“I’m going to take you to bed now. I want you to rest,”

“Don’t go,” you squeal. “I don’t want anything to happen to you.”

“Just worry about yourself. I’ll be right back, promise.”

Right after the door shuts, a jingle of keys and a loud lock echoes in the small apartment. Joel rattles the door for good measure, checking that it’s properly locked just in case you would think of going out again. Not that you would. You don’t even remember why you wanted to leave so badly in the first place.

You’re not sure how much time passes. You flinch at the sound of the door slamming shut, your curious gaze flicks to the entrance of the bedroom. You’re surprised when Joel staggers through the door, his hand holding the nape of the man who attacked you. The man is heavily bruised, bleeding with a limp to his step.

You feel a mixture of relief and shock, your mouth opens and closes right after, not knowing what to say.

“Is this the fuckhead who bruised you?” Joel spits, shaking the man. The blond whines and gives you a pleading look. You stay silent. Joel asks again, louder this time. “Is this him? Answer me.”

Goosebumps trail over your skin, it’s like needles stabbing into your skin. The man turns white, struggling in Joel’s grasp but there’s no escape for him.

You look down, hugging your knees close to your chest, “Yes,” you whisper.

A gunshot. A thud.

With a sharp gasp, you cover your ears and squeeze your eyes shut. You breathe heavily through your nose—in and out, you try to focus on the way your lungs expand with oxygen. Joel shot him. He actually fucking shot him, tears overflow your lash line. You tremble uncontrollably, your palms clammy and cold with sweat.

The bed dips and you feel fingers circling your wrists. Joel pulls your hands down to your stomach, still holding you as his eyes trace the tear streaks going down your face. His fingers tighten, blunt nails scratching skin.

“He hurt you,” he states, no emotion to his voice. “Don’t feel bad for him. He doesn’t deserve it.”

“I didn’t want you to kill him,” you answer slowly.

“I know. You’re too good for that, too pure,” he cups your cheek, fingers dropping to hold the point of your chin. “I hope you understand now. There ain’t no limits when it comes to you, I would rather watch the world burn,”

It’s hard to focus on what he’s saying when there’s a dead body laying on the floor. You sniffle and rub your nose with the back of your hand. He smiling now, a gentle smile. You’re not supposed to mimic the expression but you do, a soft tug at the corner of your lips. Your heart swells.

“That’s my girl,” he muses, the pad of his thumb following the seam of your lips. “I would kill a thousand more to see that smile,”

You part your lips, allowing him to slip his finger in between them. He groans when your swirl your tongue, sucking him deeper. He shifts on the bed, cock uncomfortably straining against his jeans. He removes his finger and pulls at your bottom lip. Your eyes meet.

He’s dangerous, you remember suddenly. The words that were uttered to bring out sympathy bring out fear instead; the lengths he’d go to keep you safe, the promise of more lifeless bodies made as an offering to you. However, that’s not the only thing that makes you shudder. It’s the fact that you enjoy it. Joel protects you from the darkness, a beacon of violently bright light. He’s something that you never thought you’d have.

A protector.

You say nothing when he pushes you down onto your back. He strips you slowly, heavy fingers tracing every inch of your naked body. Joel remains clothed, only his jeans unbuttoned and unzipped. You feel like a piece of art that he’s only allowed to touch. The same fingers that pulled the trigger brush the swell of your eye, still pulsing under his touch.

His lips find yours in a frenzy. The moment of softness gone, leaving only hunger and need in its wake. You feel the clash of teeth, the lick of his tongue. The cut on your lip stings when he nips your bottom lip, you gasp, the blossoming pain forcing your hips up to grind up against him.

He growls into your mouth and you swallow the sound. Blindly you reach out and pull his hand to your throat, a plea falling from your lips as you beg him to squeeze. He does so with little objection. His thumb smooths over your pulse, feeling it before starting to block the airflow. Your eyes water and a choked moan rips from your throat. Joel shimmies down, brushing his lips down your breasts and drawing a stiff nipple into his mouth. He nips at the stiff peak and flicks his tongue.

Arousal pools between your legs, cunt dripping and leaving the inside of your thighs wet. He presses two fingers against your clit, a wave of pleasure hits you unexpectedly, you claw at his wrist but he doesn’t loosen his grip, instead, he tightens his hold.

“You’re never gonna attempt that shit again are you?” he mutters, inhaling your scent. “Don’t force me to do anything I’ll regret, little bird,”

You feel incredibly cold, the words spoken chill you from the inside out, an icy exterior forming around your skin. But your body reacts independently from the fear. Your breathing hitches, eyes rolling back as your heat chases the pads of his fingers. Joel cups your sex and roughly grinds his palm into your clit, you let out a muffled cry You feel your eyes starting to bug out.

“I can’t lose anyone else.” your vision starts to fade to black, you can’t breathe. Joel mouths your other nipple, the tip of his tongue drawing soft circles. “I need you to understand that. The only thing you need to fear is what I’m willing to do to keep you with me.”

You wheeze and your lips go numb, your nails start to tear away at his skin.

A sharp sting blossoms over your chest, more slick drips from your pussy, he teeths at your nipple again and again, not stopping until your panicked whimpering becomes breathless moans.

You’re not sure what prompts him to do it but he finally lets go of your throat, the sudden flood of oxygen makes your head spin.

“Turn over.”

With wobbly arms and legs, you oblige. The rough fabric of his jeans scrapes the back of your thighs, he thrusts forward, pushing his shaft between your legs and coating it with the arousal gathered between your legs. His fingers brush your neck, tracing where he squeezed earlier. Instead of flinching you lean into his touch, aching to feel the warmth of his bare skin.

He continues to glide his cock between your wet folds, his breathing heavy, he stuffs his fingers into your mouth. You lick eagerly, your walls clenching around nothing. The warm fan of his breath tickles your damp skin, tongue tracing down your shoulder blades.

“J-Joel— please,”

“You think you deserve my cock?”

Your vision dotted, a whine falls from your parted lips. You push back into him. He moans into your skin, nipping over your spine. His hand slices through the air, delivering a sharp hit to the meat of your ass. You cry out and bite the inside of your cheek.

“I have half a mind to fuck your thighs and leave you wantin’” his chest heaves. “Especially after the scare you gave me,”

“I’m sorry,” you hiccup. “I really am. I just wanted to look around. I-I never wanted to leave, just needed some air,”

Your pleas are followed by his sigh, he sounds exasperated but his voice softens nonetheless. He soothes the pain by kneading you like dough. “How about we go out every Friday?”

You shake your head, trembling when the head of his cock catches against your clit. “I don’t want to—’Just want you,”

“Is that so,” he hums, nodding. “Good. Maybe you really did learn your lesson,”

“I did, sir. Please,”

“Fuck, I love hearin’ you beg sweetheart,” he says, delivering a particularly hard thrust between your legs. You keen at the drag of his cock, head falling back with a moan. “Beg me for it.”

“Please,” you whimper. “Please, sir. I need it so bad. I want your big fat cock,”

Joel visibly shudders at that, he takes a fistful of your hips and grinds into you. Harder, faster, his cock throbs, balls draw tight. You’re so fucking wet, drooling all over him. He sucks a sharp breath and buries himself into you with one smooth movement. Your pleas rise into a high-pitched whimper.

The warm heat of your cunt is indescribable. Momentarily he forgets everything; the outbreak, the dead body he needs to dispose of— all of it gone in a blink of an eye. And it’s all thanks to your sweet pussy.

Joel holds you down, his grip like iron as he pounds into you with hard strokes. You scream but make no sound, your body nothing but a toy for him. Feeling the soft, dark curls that fill the space above his cock gives you a sense of adrenaline and need. Your eyes pinch close, the pillow rubbing your skin raw. Your back arches to support the way he’s tearing you into half, hips lifting up toward him more.

He smacks you again, the muscle under his heavy palm rippling at the strike. But the pain is welcome, shooting down your back and to your core. You cry out for him, thanking him for fucking you, the words awaken something animalistic in him. Joel moves punishingly, a stark reminder that he’s still angry with you. He jackhammers his hips down into your body.

He slams his hips, hoarse groans attached to the beating sound of him hard against your ass. Sweat beads at his tailbone, trickling down his tanned skin.

Forgiveness comes in the form of him trailing open-mouthed kisses across the blades of your shoulders, the trickle of his hair sends goosebumps up your body as he moves. You hear him growl through gritted teeth, your stomach goes taut, legs tense. Joel moves, rocking in and out of you. He knocks the air from your lungs.

Joel hits that deep soft spot inside of you, stroking over it with the drag of his cock again and again. You feel your skin prickle, your core sucking him needily. You scream in the plush of the pillows, he reaches down and pulls you up so he can see your face, even if it’s from the side.

“Look at you,” he says, southern drawl thick. “So cock drunk. Good–fucking–girl,”

Your eyes roll back when he grinds against the deep, soft spot inside of you that makes you see stars. You forget about the swell of your eye, the cut on your bottom lip. His thighs shake as he holds you in place, feeling you squeeze his cock in a way that promises to milk him dry.

Joel empties himself into you with short, hard thrusts of his hips that your pussy pulls and pulls, throbbing around him. He pulls out, strings of slick stretching between your sweaty bodies. You’re all shiny and swollen, glistening with remnants of him and you. You collapse to your side, breathing heavily. You gasp when he affectionately swats your ass.

“I’m going to take care of a couple things now,” he rasps, addressing the elephant (body) in the room. “Stay put. Don’t go anywhere. My forgiveness is not a cheap thing, bird.”

When you nod, he leans over you and presses his lips to your temple.

You don’t look when Joel drags the body of the man who assaulted you out of the room. You don’t think of the outside when you hear the familiar locking of the door.

Pleasure still buzzes in your veins, your head floating above it all. You stretch and smile lazily. You wrap yourself with a blanket, ignoring Joel’s seed still dripping down your thighs.

Sleep is soon to take you, your dreams limited to the inside.

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