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luffyvace · 4 months

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Luffy x black reader♡

not a request or from my list i just wanted to do more luffy/ace and one piece content since it’s is what this acc mains:)

more of luffy and ace will come sooner or later so enjoy loves<3

not gonna specify gender bc there’s more for fem black reader i believe so i’ll leave up to you as to who you are☀︎

obviously luffy’s seen black people before

and i say that bc it’s not like in some anime’s where all the background characters are pale

some are tan, black, pale, whatever!

i like the diversity in one piece :)

anyway so yeah we’re starting with the hair

he likes the texture of it and will subconsciously play with your hair a lot

i feel like he does the same to usopp

your hair may or may not be longer than his tho

whoever has longer hair when he stretches it out is who’s hair he plays with more

you and usopp def relate and make inside jokes

he says “boing boing boing” while pulling on your hair and watching the recoil/shrinkage

LOLL

there’s a lot more males in one piece and the black ones usually have they’re hair in fro’s

especially since majority are pirates

but when he sees you braid your hair he thinks it’s cool and asks you to do the same to his

and you do but you tell him and won’t be the same

you explain that it’s a protective style that-

whats that? 🤨

he doesn’t get it 😐

🧍‍♀️

nevermind luffy..

likes to take baths with you and wash your hair for you

honestly he likes the whole process of you taking care of your hair

like the drying, the boing, what it looks like when it’s wet

everything

as far as AAVE

you either talk to usopp or loose your mind trying to explain it to him 😭

you and usopp could have a whole conversation and NO ONE is able to “decode” what your talking about

”what language is that?? what are you talking about?”

”are you hiding secrets?” teach me i wanna know!!”

if you do bother to try

after explaining all he says is ‘i don’t get it’

‘so you created your own language??”

”you know what luffy..yeah, that’s the best i can explain it to you anyway”

if y’all come across an adventure where a code needs to be cracked he’s gonna assume you know it 🤷‍♀️

YOUR FITS BE FIRE🔥🔥

but usopp gets it better than he does 😔

the rest of the crew too duh

but luffy…

my boy just don’t care about who’s wearing what and WHY

he doesn’t see a fancy rich lady because she’s wearing expensive clothes

he sees a lady.

likewise when he sees you, he sees…….YOU

duh..🤦‍♀️

sooo..yeah kinda disappointing 😭

at least you have usopp tho 🗣🗣

which reminds me to quickly mention if your chubby he pays it no mind

unless it’s affecting your mental health, then he does everything in his power to make you laugh

now i know he called alvida fat at first, BUT i feel if luffy likes you he’s less likely to insult you

usopp nose don’t count

due to that i’ll say he wouldn’t call you any mean names if you are chubby

in the same way he won’t mention or compliment you if you have curves/abs

even if you worked hard for them 😞

also thinks you rival sanji when it comes to cooking and seasonings

for the sake of the headcanons let’s say you can cook if you can’t

“MMMM _____ THIS IS SOO GOOD!!”

”YUMMYYYYY!!”

”did sanji teach you how to cook?! this is delicious!!”

TEACH HIM THE WORD BUSSIN/BANGIN IT’D BE SO FUNNY

”MMM ______ THIS MEAT BUSSIN!!”

IMAGINE THAT IN LUFFY’S VOICE

anyway🧍‍♀️

your mac and cheese>>🤤

sanji is certainly impressed by such skills

even more so when you say it’s been passed down through generations

he’s kind enough to let you prepare some dishes even!

only down slide is..now you have to cook for luffy

you and sanji gotta 2v1 this man in the middle of the night to keep him from raiding the fridge 😞😒

and you best bet this man will go back and forth between begging you and sanji to cook for him

depending on what type of person you are you’ll do it or not

and he’s STILL rushing you even when your BOTH working on cooking

ain’t fast enough 😐

my mans needs the food right in front of him 😭🤦‍♀️

you tell him all about your culture and he listens well and wants to try some stuff

he might want to try head wraps, food (obviously) and dances the most

you can tell he’s genuinely interested and it makes you happy

also another thing about your hair is he describes it as ticklish

”ticklish? luffy?”

“yeah! because when we go to sleep or cuddle and you turn around, your hair tickles my nose and i sneeze!”

😭😭

also wonders why your hair and skin is oily

will swipe some off your nose and rub it between his fingers

BRO PLEASE

after you explain to him that that’s naturally how you are and it’s to keep your hair and skin from going dry he’s like “oooooh.”

doesn’t question it much after that

two more things about the AAVE

one, after he hears you call your “language” AAVE he asks what it stands for/means and when you tell him

“it stands for ‘African American Vernacular English’ Luffy, basically it means how black people talk.”

OHHHHH HE THINKS HE GETS IT NOW!!

omg finally?!?!

that took so long but whatever 😭

”so is that why you talk like that?”

”i should slap the taste outta your mouth” 😒

”WHAT?! that’s sounds like it’ll hurt!! don’t do that _____ i won’t be able to taste food anymore!!” ☹️

your conversations consist of :

”WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?! I DON’T GET IT?! EXPLAIN!!”

“JUST FORGET IT!!”

have fun explaining your every sentence to this man :)

yippie i finally did more luffy hcs! i’ve been wanting to for a long time but worked on other drafts instead and never got around to it. anyway, hopefully you enjoyed loves!! <3

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starsurface · 1 month

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Regressor Syzoth w/ CG Kitana: Broken Cookie Jar!!

WARNING: A lot of mentions to hitting, screaming, and abuse. (None of it happens, but Syzoth panics)

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Syzoth giggled quietly as he snuck into the kitchen. He was invisible, no one could see him!! This was the perfect idea to steal some cookies!!

Kitana and him had baked some earlier. She let him have one after they were done cooling off, but then she put them into the cookie jar! It was a Johnny Cage cookie jar, a gift from the star himself. Johnny said it was a chibi version of him? Whatever that meant.

Kitana scolded him earlier when he tried to get more. She said he had to wait until after dinner- After dinner!!!

That was so far away!

Okay, it was in like, thirty minutes, but that was still so long!!

Surely if he took just one more, it wouldn't hurt anybody.

He had distracted Kitana by asking if she could fetch his dinosaur plushie, Fetch! He did want him, but he also knew Kitana would leave him alone for a few minutes to go get him. He could easily shove a cookie in his mouth and then head back outside where they were playing!

The chefs were busy with other matters so almost none were in the kitchen, mostly because Kitana was semi-set on making cookies in peace. Syzoth adored hanging outside while small, but Mileena had made a special place in the garden just for regressors. And he didn't wanna be little in front of people.

"Just one cookie," Syzoth whispered to himself.

He lifted the lid and grabbed a cookie, shoving it into his mouth. It tasted so yummy!!

Technically, he wasn't supposed to be having human food. But one cookie here or there wouldn't make him throw up. . . The tummy ache would be incredibly painful still.

But Syzoth was too small to be concerned about whether his tummy would ache or not. Right now, all he wanted to focus on was eating the cookies. They were delicious!! How could he not steal some?

Maybe it'd be alright for him to steal another one? No one was around . . . It would be fine-

"Syzoth?" Kitana walked into the kitchen. "Where could he have-"

Syzoth dropped the lid he was holding. It was suspicious anyhow, a floating lid.

But the lid didn't land on the counter or back in place. It hit the jar at an awkward angle, knocking the cookie jar over.

A few cookies fell out and onto the counter. Which was fine, everything was fine.

But then the jar started rolling. And Syzoth couldn't catch it in time before-

CRASH!!!

He had done it now.

"Syzoth, what did you do?" Kitana frowned, looking at the shattered glass. "Turn visible, I want to see you, now."

Syzoth didn't like the fact she was using his real name. It shouldn't bother him, he knows it shouldn't. But Kitana always had pet names for him!

Syzoth turned himself back visible, sheepishly looking at the ground, holding onto his robes tightly. Was Kitana going to yell and hit him? No, she wasn't that cruel. . . Right?

She'd never yelled at him before when he was being naughty. A few lectures sure. Most times a stern warning voice was all he needed before behaving again or voicing what was wrong.

But he had also never quite broken not only a rule, but glass at the same time.

Back with Shang Tsung, had Syzoth ever dropped a bottle or a glass, he'd . . . he'd . . .

He backed slightly as Kitana stepped forward.

"I- I," Syzoth struggled, lip already quivering as tears filled his eyes. "I didn't mean to! I'm sorry!"

"You're alright, hatchling," Kitana said, putting her hands up as she slowly walked forward. She grabbed the duster pan on her slow walk. "Back away from the jar, alright? I need to clean this up."

"Pease don't yell!" Syzoth begged, clutching onto his robes tightly. "O-Or hit, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to be naughty or break the rules or trick you!! I-"

"Hey, hey, hey, take a deep breath for me, sweetheart," Kitana shushed him gently, softly touching his hair. The act usually calmed him down. He adored head pats. No longer were the acts cruel and violent. "Go stand over there, okay? I don't want you to get a cut. Then we'll sit down and talk, okay?"

Syzoth's lip quivered, "Time out?"

Syzoth didn't really serve timeouts. Maybe once, or twice, but he didn't like feeling abandoned, or alone. It was scary, he didn't want to be scared anymore.

Kitana held back a sigh, gently pushing Syzoth away, "Sy, please, move away from the glass."

Syzoth watched as Kitana cleaned his mess. He tried to help, he wanted to help, but Kitana stressed that she didn't need it.

Syzoth couldn't exactly read her tone. Was she annoyed? Was she mad or angry? Was she really going to 'talk' with him, or was she going to yell and scream?

Kitana had to throw away some of the cookies that had fallen with the cookie jar. Actually, she had to throw away most of the cookies, much to Syzoth's dismay, and Kitana even had to throw away the entire cookie jar!!

Kitana put the dust pan away, giving Syzoth a soft smile, "Can you tell me what happened?"

"Wanted another cookie," Syzoth admitted sheepishly. "But you said no. So I made a plan and told you to get Fetch while I got a cookie. I'm sorry for deceiving you."

"Deceivings a very big word," Kitana commented. "Where are you right now, Sy? You feeling big or little, Hun?"

"Lil," Syzoth gripped his robes tightly. "Just . . scared."

"Well I'm not very happy you tricked me, but I'm not mad either. You know what human food does to your tummy, baby. It makes you feel all icky and gross. ANd it makes your tummy hurt a lot, doesn't it?" Kitana asked. Syzoth whined in response.

"But they were yummy!"

"Sy," Kitana gave a slightly stern tone, making Syzoth back down, "I said we could have more cookies after dinner, didn't I?"

Syzoth gave a small nod, "Mhm. But now there's no more cookies!"

"That's because half of them were covered in glass, Sweetheart," Kitana sighed, pulling Syzoth into a hug. "Next time I say no more cookies until after dinner, you listen, okay?"

"Otay," Syzoth nodded, hugging Kitana back tightly. "You sure you're not mad, 'Tana?"

"I'm sure," Kitana kissed his forehead. "I'm a bit upset about the whole situation, but I'm not exactly mad. I'm glad you didn't get hurt," Kitana put her finger up, "But you only get one cookie later!"

Syzoth wanted to whiny and disagree at that. Originally he was allowed three cookies after dinner. But now only one!! There was maybe five, seven cookies left? And it was a better outcome than getting a spanking of timeout . . .

"Otay," Syzoth looked deflated.

Kitana kissed his temple, "Let's get the surviving cookies into a zip lock. You wanna help me?"

Syzoth nodded, going to grab a zip lock. Kitana placed the cookies inside. Syzoth help a bit happier, now being allowed to help out. Kitana placed the cookies in a cabinet, one that little Syzoth would try to reach.

"Where's Fetch?" Syzoth asked, suddenly realizing that his stuffie wasn't with Kitana.

"He's waiting outside!! On your little sun rock," Kitana said. There was a designated 'sun laying' rock that Syzoth claimed when he first got here.

Syzoth looked very happy before frowning, pointing to the trashcan, "I'm sorry I broke the jar. Didn't mean to drop it, it was an accident."

"I assumed as much," Kitana said before smirking. "Honestly, it was pretty ugly anyways."

Syzoth giggled at that, "Don't let Johnny hear that, 'Tana!"

"Then it'll stay between us," Kitana winked at him, Syzoth nodded and blinked back. "But I suppose that we'll have to get a new cookie jar, won't we? What kind of jar should we get?"

"Santa jar!" Syzoth gasped. "We get a Santa jar?"

"YOu do love Christmas, don't you?" Kitana ruffled his hair.

Other than Valentine's day, Christmas was Syzoth's favorite holiday. Kitana loved it as well, Earthrealm had such nice holiday.

"Santa jar," Syzoth repeated.

Kitana chuckled, "Kinda sounds like this was all a plan to replace our cookie jar."

"Was not!" Syzoth gasped, shaking his head.

"Was too!" Kitana stuck her tongue at him before dashing out of the kitchen.

Syzoth whined, running after her, "Nuh-uh! I- 'Tana!!"

But there was a smile on both their faces.

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

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blorbocedes · 1 year

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wow, the alex video you posted IS so deranged and yet valid. i for one would love to hear any further thoughts about galex cannibalism you may have??

this is so deranged...... anyways what if galex were stuck on an island 🤪😳🏝 (based off this video)

Turns out being stranded on a deserted island is really anticlimactic. Incredibly boring, and more of a waiting game, once the adrenaline, relief, and panic at being alive wears off.

"We're the most tracked people on Earth. Once the teams figure out what happened, they'll send those large helis. We'll be out of here in no time. Probably in time to catch the next race too." George paces around, as if delegating his own rescue operation. Saying it out loud affirms it, it's going to happen, and therefore all George needs is to be cool and collected. His phone hadn't survived the waves, but he's sure it had sent his last known location somewhere near the waters. That's why they allow themselves to be tracked by technoautocrats all time, right? George isn't even worrying.

Alex is sitting down on the sand, with his small collection of rocks he's gathered and halfheartedly rubbing them together. You need a fireplace for that, George think irritated. Or like, a collection of sticks in a circle. He doesn't know, he's an F1 driver for fuck's sake.

Alex snorts, "Reckon they'll save the biggest helis for Lewis? Realise he's safe and sound in LA and bring out the backup single seater ones for George Russell?"

"Piss off. I suppose they'd find us faster if I was stuck with Max but you don't see me saying that." George snipes back. Admittedly, they're not on their best behaviour. Something about waking up concussed and realizing you're on a deserted island with the sun blazing down on you, and no fresh water or belongings nearby has a way of doing that to people.

"Ouch." Alex sounded mock-offended. He made a smiley face with his rocks.

"Shouldn't be long now." George bluffs with absolutely no way of knowing, only he needs to believe it. The waves dip into the beach, treacherously soothing. All that water, and nothing to drink. George imagines heroically catching a fish. He's not quite sure how to go about that, but Alex would for sure be impressed.

"We've got to think more long term, George."

"What do you mean?"

Alex levels him with a look. "Look around us. We're the only living things around for god knows how long. You've got to start thinking survival of the fittest."

George heroically catching fish. Alex in those lionskin dress the wives wore in the flinstones, cooking it over a fire. They Blue Lagoon it for years. Having to hold each other for warmth by the fire as they sleep to crackling hum.

"Yeah?" George asks, mouth going dry and not from the lack of water.

"There's only so much of each other we can take. You've gotta do what it takes to survive. That's what they don't tell you about deserted islands, the rules don't apply here. We can do anything here, and get away with it. And from what I can see, we're the only food source around. Anyone ever tell you you've got the neck of a gazelle?"

"You wanna eat me, Albon?" Dies down in George's throat, can't make it sound casual enough, like a joke. Not with the way Alex is staring at him, dark eyes, like he's something particularly delicious. We can do anything here, and get away with. The rules don't apply here. The giant helicopters with their flashlights could find them fucking them on the beach, and it wouldn't matter. Except they'd probably have cameras, to film the whole rescue operation and then yes, it does matter. Everything they do here matters.

"I'm not eating you. You're all bones and stuff, no thanks." George huffs, the dehydration truly settling in as his face gets redder.

"You don't want a little Thai food out here?" Alex laughs, reaching from where he's sitting and pulling at George's ankle who trips and falls on his ass on the hard sand.

Alex is flirting with me. Or he wants to eat me. George is not sure which is worse.

"Say a hyena gets me, you've gonna let a stupid bird have at me? Not even honour my body?" Alex still has his hand on George's ankle, the grip of it unrelenting. George's heart thuds in his chest.

"There's no hyenas around." He argues with reasonable confidence, despite not knowing.

"I wouldn't let a bird do that to you. I'd think, my friend George would've wanted me to survive." Alex moves closer, until he's halfway on top of George. His hand moves to the soft flesh of George's thigh sticking out from his shorts, and circles it. It's a little on the nose to feel like a prey trapped under a predator, imagining Alex kissing the soft of thigh before biting down on it, blood around the jut of that handsome mouth. One way or another, they'd both leave this island together. Within one another. It would be so, so easy to press Alex's head down here. Between his legs. Crush him with his thighs. "Whatever it takes."

"Fuck, fine. If a fucking hyena gets you, l'll shoo it away and eat you. Happy?" George pushes Alex off him, getting up, who grins up lazily from where he's fallen on the sand.

Heart still beating in his chest like a wild rabbit, George runs into the clearing of a few trees -- not wanting to venture further from where Alex won't be able to hear him if he calls for help. Their first mode of action had been making a SOS that could be seen from above, from the search helicopters, with the biggest rocks they could find. Turns out their strength at driving race cars had absolutely no use in lugging large rocks and they'd given up after the first C of the S. Finding large rocks makes George feel like he's doing something productive, actually aiding their rescue.

But Alex's words swim into his head. Survival of the fittest. Almost paranoid that Alex is watching, even though he's still lying on the beach, George stares into the clearing of trees ahead. There could be signs of life inside and he really doesn't want to find out, or be unarmed if there is. He just has to wait it to out. The rescue planes are coming. Entire jets. The whole country is on red alert. They're going to shake hands with the King.

Delirious in the heat, and the amount of blood that's rushed south, the shine of his wrist catches the sun. His sponsor gold Tag Heuer watch. A few hundred thousand quid. He takes it off, checking it's weight, and then places it on the ground. Takes the rock he'd found, and smashes it, collecting the now broken watch, and shards of glass in his pocket.

He makes his way back to Alex.

"What happened to your nice watch, Georgie?" Alex asks casually, frizzy air dried blond hair sticking up. Still looks great, like this. Tanned skin, blonde hair, pants rolled up as shorts. They could be on a beach vacation. George thumbs the watch in his closed fist, along the sharp ridges of where it broke.

"You got something in your pants or are you just happy to see me, Alexander?" George asks, staring at the rock sized bulge in Alex's left pocket.

"Always happy to see you." Alex smiles, and George mentally maps where his jugular should be as he takes a step towards him.

#galex but make it cannibalism themed 🤪#the good ending: they both find a coconut and get over their dehydrated fuelled shared insanity <3 #the other good ending: they [redacted]#the bad ending: they get rescued and their relationship is forever changed for it #my fics #f1 rpf #im actually embarazzed this has an audience of literally only me #don't ask me I don't know #blorbocedes ask

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notsoattractivearenti · 1 year

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Polar Opposites (Christian Pulisic x Reader) - Part 2

WC: 1.4K

Warnings: curse words

A/N: I honestly didn't plan on writing this second part this soon but here it is 🤭 Huge thanks to @ariddletobesolved for her help! 💗 Hope you all enjoy and I'd love to hear your thoughts thru reply/reblog/ask 🫶 If you wanna be added to the taglist let me know 😊 Feedbacks are highly appreciated!

| PART 1 | PART 3 | PART 4 |

---

Planning a party is one of your favorite things to do, but this time you couldn’t even enjoy doing so because you had to plan an engagement party with someone you pretty much despised – it was such a nightmare. The previous day, Christian agreed to come to your place to discuss the arrangement.

“Black and white. Simple.”

“Black and white? Wha- Are we throwing them a fucking funeral? No. Pick other colors, Christian. Don’t be so basic.”

“Oh, like you have a better suggestion?”

“Umm, as a matter of fact I do. I’m thinking light blue, ivo-“

Christian gagged, “Yuck, soft colors? Too feminine, sounds horrible. Veto.”

“Sure, I forgot how “masculine” you are for a second,” you rolled your eyes, responded to his objection sarcastically, “of course “feminine” colors give you the ick.”

“Hey don’t twist my words! That’s not what I’m saying!” Christian shouted.

You and Christian spent more than 2 hours just arguing over the theme and color scheme for the party. Claire and Nick put you and Christian in charge of everything – they only informed you about the date and possible guest list – so both of you had to plan the whole thing together. You two shared the same goal: to make this party perfect for the happy couple – but had very different approaches.

- - -

“Listen... Outdoor dinner is so romantic. You can literally look at the night sky, and the lights, oh... Bet you they would love it!”

“Why outdoor when we can do it indoors? It’s sheltered, we can control the temperature inside, no bugs... Need I say more?” He argued.

- - -

“Carrot cake. Definitely carrot cake.” He suggested.

“Nooooo,” you whined, “you literally have the worst taste in everything. Disgusting!”

“What do you mean ‘disgusting’? It’s fucking delicious!”

“It is most certainly not. But Red Velvet is, so let’s just go with that.”

“Veto!”

- - -

“I think we should go with plated dinner. It’s a lot more sophisticated. And simple. An-“

“Jesus, Christian!” You interrupted him. “How is that even simple? Have you ever planned a dinner party before???”

“Okay then, please explain how the fuck could a buffet be better than plated dinner???”

“Buffet is the only right choice! What if some of the guests don’t like the food? With a buffet at least they have more options. It’s not even the wedding!” You insisted.

- - -

It was almost impossible for both of you to find a common ground. He thought your idea was too complicated and took a lot longer to plan, while you thought his was too effortless and didn’t feel special at all. You two kept pushing your ideas to each other and were too stubborn to compromise.

“Do you want to plan a party or not? Stop messing around and for fuck’s sake, just decide on something!” At this point, Christian had lost most of his patience.

“I was never messing around in the first place! Ugh,” you grunted, “I’m so close on murdering you, you pigheaded douchebag.”

“Please, Y/N, kill me now,” he replied mockingly, “I’d rather die than have to go through this shit with you.”

“That’s it, I need a fucking break,” you said as you stood up and aggressively grabbed your phone, “I’ll be back in- you know what? Why bother?”

He rolled his eyes. “Good Lord... Sure, take all the time you need,” he muttered while watching you storm out, “it’s not like we have a deadline or something.”

You left without saying a word and gave him a middle finger before you angrily slammed the door. You were like a ticking time bomb – one more word from him and you would explode. You needed a moment to cool down after an extremely stressful time. You were aware that this was going to be hard, but not this hard. You have never met someone as infuriating as Christian, he really got on your nerves – and since you and Christian had pivotal roles in your best friends’ wedding, you had no choice but stuck with him.

Usually, when you were this upset, you would call Claire to vent. She’s a really good listener, and you always feel comfortable talking about everything to her. But right now, you couldn’t do it because you didn’t want to stress her out. She picked you as her Person of Honor and you’ve accepted every responsibility that comes with the role – you really couldn’t let her down. She didn’t need to know this struggle of yours just yet.

After walking around the neighborhood for some time, you finally felt ready to go back on planning the engagement party with Christian. But shortly before, you tried to prepare yourself by closing your eyes, took three deep breaths, then whispered to yourself: Claire, I’m gonna do my best for you.

“Oh look who’s back!” As soon as you opened the front door, you heard him shout. “You have wasted, uh...” he checked his watch, “20 minutes of planning time. We could literally use those 20 minutes to decide on foods, you know.”

You pressed your lips together and shook your head, trying not to snap at him.

“My house, my rules,” you responded calmly. “20 minutes is not even that long, anyway. You’ve been here for like, what, probably 5 hours now? And still, no decision has been made.”

“And whose fault is that?”

“Our fault, you dumbass. I mean, you could’ve written down some ideas in those 20 minutes, yet you did nothing.”

He narrowed his eyes, displeased by your answer. “Gah, fine,” he groaned, “let’s get back to business.”

“Oh, and by the way, when you were out doing whatever I got bored and went through your refrigerator,” he added. “Thanks for the ice cream and the berries, they were so good.”

“Wha- Christian!” You slapped his arm, “I just bought them this morning! I expect you to reimburse those!”

After countless arguments and disagreements, you two finally came up with a solid plan. It was such a long, hard day for both of you, but at least you were able to compromise and make big decisions together. After all, this celebration was not about you – it was about Nick and Claire.

---

It was the day of the engagement party. Since 9 AM you and Christian had gone back and forth to check out the venue and make sure everything went as planned. You were nervous about this entire party, especially because you didn’t get to tell Nick and Claire since they asked you to keep the details as a surprise.

The party went great and smoothly, you were glad you didn’t have anything to worry about anymore. Everyone seemed to be having the time of their lives and the couple was very pleased with how this party turned out – from the theme and decorations, the venue, the foods and drinks, and everything else.

“Hey, Y/N,” as Christian pulled you aside, “looks like we nailed it.”

You smiled while glancing around the room. “Yeah, we really did, didn’t we?”

“Sorry I snapped at you the other day,” he apologized, “I was just really stressed out back then.”

You nodded, “yeah, I’m sorry too. I swear we’re just too different! But at least we worked well together for tonight.”

There was a moment of silence between you and Christian until Nick and Claire came and greeted you both.

“Great job you guys! This is a lot better than I expected!” Claire couldn’t stop gushing over the party.

“Thank you so much, Y/N, Christian. You threw an amazing party together! I can see how great of a team you both are,” Nick said, he was beaming the entire time.

You and Christian silently shared a look at one another, you both were very proud of how well you put this beautiful celebration despite your differences – strong differences. He then gave you a nod and a wink, and you jokingly gagged in response.

Deep down, you agreed with Nick – you really were a great team. Who would’ve thought you could get along?

“I mean… Between the two of us, I’m the one with more brain cells, so…”

And… there it is. Yes, that one sentence reminded you how Christian was still irritating - just not as bad as before. At this point, you still didn’t know Christian very well, but you knew that the moment you and him getting along was temporary. Despite that, however your feeling towards him might be, you still had to cooperate with him until the wedding is over.

---

taglist: @pulisicsgirl @neverinadream @masonspulisic @swimmingismywholelife @chelseagirl98 @bracedes @lovelynikol16 @thoseboysinblue @lizzypotter14 @mortirolo @masonsrem @cinderellawithashoe @alwaysclassyeagle

#christian pulisic #christian pulisic x y/n #christian pulisic x reader #christian pulisic imagine #christian pulisic imagines #christian pulisic fanfic #christian pulisic fic #christian pulisic fic series #polar opposites series

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hystericstar · 11 months

Note

would it be okay to request some foodplay with wild link? it's canon he is a glutton so what if reader covers themselves with something yummy just for him to lick/eat off of them? >:3c

You have no idea how many times I’ve thought of this Oml-

I sort of changed it a little so I hope you don’t mind!!!

cw: food play, fem reader in mind, no pronouns used

! MDNI !

The brownies were tucked away nicely in the oven, however, the fudge still wasn’t done. It was thick and sticky, making you question whether or not you truly followed the recipe right. Your tired hands were fumbling with the whisk as the sweet sound of the oven going off pulled you away for a desperately needed break. It didn’t last long though. The brownies still had to cool down otherwise the fudge would just liquify and make for an even bigger mess. So much for trying to surprise link.

Eventually, you got everything under control and the brownies were ready to eat. The door abruptly creaked open just as you set the second glass of milk down. Right on time.

“Hey, you!” You giggled, practically skipping over to your darling as he picked you up and spun you around. “You’re just in time! I made brownies and they’re ready to eat!” You smiled. He simply grinned and pressed his face into your neck. “I don’t deserve you.” Link sighed happily. “Well then? Let’s- oomph!” A quick yelp shot out of your mouth as he sat you firmly on his lap. He grinned and started cutting into the pastry with his fork.

Instead of eating it and giving you praise like you expected, he raised the silverware up to your lips. The rich smell sent waves of saliva into your mouth as you happily opened up. Oh hylia it was delicious. The struggle you went through was quickly proved to have been worth it as the deep flavor melted on your tongue. A pleased hum resonated through you as your lover chuckled in amusement.

You opened your mouth to say something, but it was quickly forgotten as soon as his lips pressed against yours. He blindly went to feed you another bite, but some fudge fell off the fork and onto the base of your neck. He felt you tense at the sudden feeling and broke away instantly. Before you could reach to grab a napkin, he quickly stopped you.

“There’s no need.” He smiled. You saw a mischievous sparkle in his eye as he leaned down and licked the chocolate clean off. The warmth of his tongue against your skin made your leg twitch ever so slightly. He pulled away all too soon and swiped some of the sauce off of his plate with his finger, bringing it up for a taste. “Huh. It just doesn’t taste as good.” Link couldn’t find it in him to even bother trying to hide the grin on his face.

“Oh, we’ll there’s extra if you wanna try to play around with the recipe!” You swallowed thickly and motioned to a small bowl on the table filled about halfway with leftover fudge . Deep down, a part of you knew exactly where this was going, but you settled on playing it off for now. “No, I think I have an idea of what’s missing.” The words sounded playful but had a new undertone in them that you couldn’t quite place.

Before you could even form a thought, your shirt was now long gone and you were being hoisted into the air and onto the seat your boyfriend was just sitting on. He yanked off your shorts as he kneeled before you, claiming his rightful place between your legs. Your eyes widened and watched as he reached up to the small bowl before bringing it up to your chest. Link eyed you carefully, and only dared to move when you gave him silent permission in the form of a small nod. He leaned forward and wrapped his arm around your waist, swiftly unhooking your bra.

The cloth was thrown across the room in an instant before the rim of the bowl was pressed lightly against your chest. Link watched intently as the dark lukewarm liquid slowly drizzled down your perky mounds. It highlighted the rise and fall giving away how shaky your own breath had become.

He tilted the glassware back up once he was satisfied and brought it down, deciding to give your thighs a generous coating as well. This time, he moved the bowl side to side. The zigzag pattern was focused mostly on your inner thigh and you’d be lying if you said the dripping feeling didn’t tickle you a little bit.

setting the bowl back down onto the table, he muttered a quick “you ready?” Under his breath before firmly pressing his tongue to your leg. You inhaled sharply through your nose as you felt your heat grow warmer with excitement. He grazed his teeth lightly across your soft flesh and took his sweet time moving upward.

You felt your thigh involuntarily tense up as you slipped your fingers into his fluffy hair. After each thick glob of chocolate he finished cleaning up, a wet kiss would replace it. The closer he got to your heat, the more your body would softly twitch and your breathing would get more and more ragged.

By the time he was done with one leg, you were already embarrassingly needy. Not once did he touch you where you wanted him to and he knew it. You could only sit and watch as he lapped the chocolate off you like a starved man.

He eventually finished cleaning your legs off, and when he did he made his way up your stomach. He ensured that no spot was left Un-kissed while he journeyed to his destination- your chest. He licked long stripes upwards and paused to flick his tongue at your nipple. When link reached the spot where the chocolate started, he sucked a hickey were the sauce once was. By the time he was done, you essentially had a chain of love marks scattered across the skin of your chest.

You peered down at him finishing up the last hickey and when you made eye contact, you just knew he wasn’t done yet.

~《☆♡•°•°♡☆》~

GAH ITS DONEEEE

I’m still so happy I’m not the only one who’s thought of this 😭 thank you anon for giving me an excuse to finally use that idea <333

Anyways, I hope you enjoy! And thank you for requesting

#loz x reader #link x reader smut #loz link #loz x reader smut #botw link x reader smut #botw link x reader #botw x reader #botw link

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asexual-spongebob · 3 months

Text

The Waves That Lap The Shore - Chapter 22 Welcome to my abode Notes: I did some research on Indian breakfast foods for this one. I wanna try them ngl they look delicious.

also fun fact: I added “love on top” by Beyoncé to my shellso playlist right after finishing this .

“Welcome to my abode” Paani said as him and Kwazii walked inside, Paani took Kwazii to his room, Kwazii looked at everything.

Loads of posters, broken records and broken cds on the walls, a large tapestry on the ceiling, in the corner there was a record player, DVD player and cd player on a small shelf with loads of cds and records. There was also a small flat screen tv on the shelf to.

In a different corner, there was a guitar case and an amplifier. “Nice room matey!” Kwazii complimented “thanks!” Paani smiled, kicking his boots off and onto the floor and crashing onto his bed.

Kwazii soon joined them on the bed “wanna hear a song I just figured out?” Paani asked “I understand if you don’t want to!” Paani added “nah pancake, go ahead!” Kwazii smiled

He called me Pancake? Paani couldn’t believe their ears. Kwazii wasn’t usually much a pet name user.

Paani then got off their bed and picked up their guitar, they then sat on the bed, Kwazii looked over their shoulder.

Paani started playing a song, Kwazii didn’t know what it was “aye, what song is that?” Kwazii asked “Zero by The Smashing Pumpkins.” Paani answered “oh.. cool.” Kwazii meowed.

Damn… I should really get into that band… based on what Paani’s told me they seem cool… Kwazii thought to himself as he watched Paani play the intro.

Paani then began singing, Kwazii admired

her, Kwazii wondered how Paani could do that. Once Paani had finished, she turned to face Kwazii “how do you do that?” Kwazii asked “well I tend to study it quite a bit… I sit and listen to the song carefully trying to figure out each chord or fingerpicking or I just use a tab.” Paani explained.

Kwazii just gave her his “cool” look.

“Do you want to watch something?” Paani asked “sure” Kwazii smiled, Paani went to go fetch one of his adventure movie DVDS.

Paani came back and placed in the DVD on the bed, he went to the restroom to change.

He walked in wearing one of those fancy nightgowns with bows and ribbons. He looked like he was a rich girl from a late 90s or early 2000s comedy.

Paani got comfortable, Kwazii placed its head on Paani’s shoulder.

It’d been a while later, the movie had ended, Paani was about to get up to get the remote off the shelf. However they noticed that Kwazii had fallen asleep on them.

How am I supposed to get up without waking it up? Paani asked themself carry it? Yeah that sounds fine. Paani decided

Paani gently held Kwazii in their arms as they went to turn off the tv, they then went back in bed.

“Goodnight Kwazii” Paani yawned, feeling like she could pass out any moment, she got a purr in response, which she assumed was Kwazii’s way of saying goodnight.

•••

Shellington had awoke. It was five am, the twilight was still in the sky, the sun was going to rise soon.

Shellington let out a yawn maybe I should go out for an early morning swim like I used to do back in Ireland… hm.. that sounds nice. Shellington thought, grabbing his satchel and putting on his crocs. He quietly ran down to the Launch Bay.

Shellington then quietly dove into the Launch Bay tank, swimming out the Octo-Hatch.

Shellington swam for a moment, sometimes pulling out his magnifying glass like the nerd he was, studying each creature, “Fascinating!” Shellington grinned, he was happy. Until he swam near some coral that is. Shellington felt a sharp pain come from one of his fins. He had scratched it on the coral. It hurt so bad.

“Ouch!” Shellington exclaimed, noticing that his fin was bleeding “jumpin’ jellyfish! This hurts bad!” Shellington added.

He wanted to swim back to the Octopod, so he did. His fin stung so bad but he was determined to make it back.

Shellington managed to swim back, Tweak was sitting there in her room. Shellington noticed her, he started to whimper Tweak noticed and dashed over to him “Tweak… can you go get Peso. I scratched my fin while going for an early morning swim…” Shellington requested, clearly in pain.

Tweak gave him a thumbs up and called Peso

Peso picked up.

“Hey Peso, sorry to bother you this early in the mornin’ but your boyfriend here scratched his fin while going for an early mornin’ swim.” Tweak sighed “alright! I’ll be there!” Peso said, as he went to go down the Octo-Chute.

Peso came down with a towel and bandages, he dried Shellington off.

He could see the scratch on Shellington’s paw

Peso whipped out a bandage and wrapped it around it.

Shellington felt better already.

“You need to be more careful Shellie!” Peso fretted “I know… but you know how much of a klutz I am..” Shellington sighed “well… come on let’s get you some rest.” Peso said, scooping the otter up in its flippers, Tweak stared at it.

How was Peso carrying Shellington?

Tweak then went back to bed for a quick snooze.

Peso placed Shellington in bed, “get some rest Shellie” Peso said softly, kissing Shellington’s forehead and joining him back in bed.

•••

Hours later.

8:30 am, India.

Kwazii awoke, Paani was still asleep, he didn’t want to awake him just yet.

I can’t believe this is all happening right now Kwazii thought. It’s crazy how months ago I found Paani very annoying, but now here I am. Sharing a bed with him.

Damn… if I went back in time and told myself months ago that me and Paani would be dating he’d laugh in my face..

Paani rubbed the sleep from his eyes, “good morning, Kwazii.” Paani yawned, stretching and sitting up on the bed.

“Do you wanna to go eat something?” Paani asked “sure.. I’d like that.” Kwazii smiled, rolling out of Paani’s bed “are you okay?” Paani asked, “yeah I’m fine, pancake.” Kwazii meowed.

“I texted Tweak. She said she’s gonna pick me up soon.” Kwazii said, Paani gave him a thumbs up, they went to the kitchen.

Paani made some Rava Dosa for breakfast “thanks, that was really good!” Kwazii praised “thank you! I’m glad you enjoyed it” Paani smiled.

Tweak then arrived with the Gup-K “Hey Kwaz!” Tweak called from outside “comin’!” Kwazii called back as he gathered his belongings .

Kwazii shoved all of their belongings into their backpack.

“Goodbye Pancake.. I’m gonna miss you” Kwazii mrrped as they hugged Paani tight “I’m gonna miss you too, Carrot cake.” Paani said softly, kissing Kwazii’s cheek, leaving some cherry chapstick behind.

Kwazii then walked to the gup. “Bye Pancake!” Kwazii called, waving “bye carrot cake!” Paani called back, blowing a kiss.

“So Kwaz, how did it go?” Tweak asked after Kwazii got in “great!” Kwazii beamed “Paani played a Smashing Pumpkins song for me!” Kwazii added “Smashing Pumpkins? Damn. He’s got good taste.” Tweak remarked as she chomped her carrot.

Damn it… I miss Dashi… Tweak thought to herself as she drove, she wished she could be with Dashi right now.

Kwazii sat in the gup on the floor.

He noticed smell of Paani’s mango scented body spray still lingered on his clothes, Kwazii inhaled it.

Kwazii then laid back and relaxed, staring at the ceiling, remembering the events of the night before.

•••

Dashi and Shellington were chatting in the kitchen.

“Damn shell… you need to be more careful-“ Dashi remarked at the sight of Shellington’s bandaged paw “yeah- that’s what Peso told me.” Shellington replied “Anyway, hope you feel better soon!” Dashi wished “thank you!” Shellington said, walking out of the kitchen with his hot chocolate, with a bunch of toppings.

Shellington got to work, he started researching some stuff, until he heard the Octo alert go off

Octonauts, to the Launch Bay!

Shellington and Peso ran down to the Launch Bay as fast as their legs could carry them.

“There is a decent sized patch of pollution near the shoreline, we need to clean it up before any creatures get hurt.” Captain Barnacles said “Kwazii, Dashi, Tweak, Peso and Shellington to the gups” Captain Barnacles commanded, Peso and Shellington went to the Gup-E, Kwazii and Captain Barnacles went to the Gup-C and Dashi and Tweak went to the Gup-A.

Peso was blasting Beyoncé as him and Shellington drove “hey Peso… no offense but I don’t think it’s the right time to blast Beyoncé..” Shellington said “oh yeah you’re right-“ Peso agreed, turning off the music. “You can blast Beyoncé when he get home” Shellington assured.

Shellington and Peso arrived and got out of the Gup, Peso grabbed a net and dove into the water he started scooping up any pollution in sight.

He saw Shellington swimming beside him “Go easy on that fin Shellie” Peso said, Shellington gave it a thumbs up, he started scooping up trash too.

Meanwhile Dashi and Kwazii were standing the water picking up trash near by “I can do this faster! I can go up to 46 miles per hour!” Kwazii boasted “wanna see me try?” Kwazii asked “sure” Dashi smiled.

Kwazii had two nets in his paws, he sped around in a circle, Shellington was close by, Kwazii bumped into him. “Hey please watch where you’re going!” Shellington called “Sorry matey!” Kwazii called back.

“Look Dashi!” Kwazii beamed, happy about all the garbage he was able to get, he then threw it away.

It a few hours later, they’d finished cleaning up all the trash. They went back the gups.

Peso and Shellington sat in the Gup-E. “Hey Peso, you can blast Beyoncé now. It’s the perfect time.” Shellington said, placing his feet up on the glove box “FUCK YEAH!” Peso agreed with a smirk, Shellington was taken aback by Peso saying fuck.

Peso then scrolled through one of it’s many Spotify playlists, until it found the right one

“This song reminds me of you.” Peso smiled, then hitting play.

Bring the beat in

Honey, honey

I can see the stars all the way from here

#kitty giggles #octonauts #octonauts au #the waves that lap the shore au #peso x shellington #shellso #kwazini #paani x kwazii #kwazii x paani

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ejzah · 2 years

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In Miss Blye’s Class, Part 10

***

Dinner turned out surprisingly well. Despite Deeks’ worries, the food was delicious, and Caleb kept them entertained with a series of loosely connected stories. Every so often, he would glance over at Kensi with a little smile.

When his plate was about two-thirds empty, Caleb pushed it back with a long sigh, leaning back as he rubbed his stomach.

“Daddy, I can’t eat anymore,” he said pitifully.

“Oh, then I bet you’re way too full for dessert,” Deeks teased, and Caleb immediately straightened up, fully alert and without a hint of discomfort.

“I’m not that full.” He gave his dad a worried look as Deeks unsuccessfully smothered a laugh. “And look, I ate all my green beans.”

“Ok, give me a second you little fiend.” He ruffled Caleb’s hair before heading back into the kitchen and returned with a small store bought chocolate cake. Caleb ate his slice enthusiastically, much to their amusement, completely silent for the first time this evening.

“Daddy, can I go play?” he asked when he’d scraped up every last crumb.

“Yeah, go ahead, but clear your place first.”

Grabbing everything from his spot, Caleb quickly rinsed his plate and glass at the sink and then put them to the side. Normally, Kensi might have been suspicious that Deeks was trying to show off or give a false representation of their home life, but it was obvious this was a normal routine for them. Plus, aside from Deeks’ worries about the meal, he’d been refreshingly open about his faults.

“You wanna play with legos with me, Miss Blye?” Caleb offered on his way out of the room. “I got a new set that makes a farmhouse.”

“I’d love to play legos with you, but first I have to help your dad clean up from dinner.”

His head dipped a little at her response and he sighed heavily.

“Ok, but don’t take too long, alright? Because It’s super cool. There’s a tiny cow, sheep, and even a tractor that you get to construct.”

“Alright, we’ll be out in a little bit,” Deeks told him, bending to give him a quick kiss on the very top of his head. “Remember, it’s a school night so don’t make a big mess.”

“Uh-huh.”

While Deeks started clearing the rest of the table, Kensi went in search of storage containers.

“Oh, you don’t have to do that,” he said after she opened the the third cabinet and found a collection of plastic and glass Tupperware.

“I don’t mind helping,” Kensi said. Which is how she found herself standing side-by-side with Deeks, drying dishes as he washed them. There was something oddly comfortable about doing the simple task together.

“So, what does your mom do that she was called in so last minute? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“She runs a catering business,” Deeks answered easily. “Someone called off so mom had to step in for a 200 guest wedding. It’s a crazy life, but she loves it.”

“I assumed you didn’t have anyone close by because otherwise you seem very family oriented,” Kensi observed, realizing a second too late that it sounded extremely judgmental. Fortunately, Deeks didn’t seem offended; he nodded in apparent agreement.

“I love my mother deeply and she is a wonderful people, but we tend to drive each other crazy when we spend too much time together. It’s better for everyone if we’re not in easy driving distance of each other which is why I purposely chose a house two hours away.”

“I’ll bet she wasn’t a fan of that.”

“She wasn’t at first. But I reminded her what happened when we stayed with her for a week after the divorce.” Deeks chuckled softly, pausing with a sponge in his hand. “We nearly annoyed each other to death within the first two days. And that was while mom was working part of the time.”

“Well, those kinds of situations are hard on everyone,” Kensi offered diplomatically.

“Yes, they are. It doesn’t help that Mama tends to be brutally honest. Which can be a beautiful thing, just not when you’re trying to keep a mildly civil relationship with your ex,” he said.

Deeks handed her a baking dish, and rubbed beneath his nose, leaving behind a streak of soap.

“And your dad?” she asked as she dried the dish and set it to the side.

“Out of the picture. He was, to put it nicely, a grade A ass,” he answered, smiling sarcastically. “My mom eventually got tired of his crap and filed for divorce when I was about 11. Best decision she ever made in my opinion.” It was the most negatively Kensi ever heard him speak about anyone so far, including his ex.

It explained a lot thought. While some adults mirrored their parents behavior, it was obvious that Deeks had done the opposite. His relationship with Caleb was proof enough of that.

Although he hadn’t said anything specific, she would bet Deeks’ gentle form of parenting was in direct reaction to his father’s methods.

“What about you? I feel like all we do is talk about me and you’re still kind of a mystery. What deep dark secrets are in Kensi Blye’s closet?” He said it jokingly enough that Kensi knew he wouldn’t push for any information, but she heard the curiosity in his voice.

“Well, my mom is a realtor and dad’s a colonel in the Marines. They’re divorced too. Fortunately, very amicably.” In the beginning when their relationship started to wane, they’d fought some, but it was never violent. Mostly, they’d drifted apart and didn’t have the resources to fix it. “I was old enough during the divorce to choose who I spent most of my time with and I picked my dad.”

“Wow, and he was still in the military all that time?” Deeks asked, resting his forearms on the edge of the sink basin. There were a few more plates and piece of silverware left but he didn’t seem in a hurry to finish.

“Yeah. Traveling and moving across country pretty frequently was rough sometimes, especially as a teenager. We got through it though and sometimes I stayed with mom if I needed a break,” Kensi said. “I guess that might seem like a horrible situation and crappy parenting.” Despite her best efforts, she knew she sounded defensive. Over the years, teachers, friends, and colleagues had expressed everything from sympathy to outright disapproval. “But it’s all I ever knew and most of the time I loved it. I got to experience things that no one else would.”

Deeks shrugged, bracing his arms so he was half-bent over the sink. There was a soft look in his eyes as he faced her.

“I don’t think that at all. It sounds like you had two loving parents who

listened to you and tried to do what was best in difficult circumstances,” he murmured. A touch of wistfulness crossed his face. “It’s commendable.”

“A lot of people would disagree with you.”

“Well, then they’re idiots,” Deeks said bluntly enough to make Kensi snort in surprise. It was a simple statement, but Kensi appreciated it more than Deeks could ever know. After so many years of defending her parents, her lifestyle as a child, she expected judgment and derision. It was a welcome relief to have someone who accepted her as is.

Her appreciation must have been apparent as she stared at Deeks for far too long because he dipped his head, cheeks reddening beneath his beard. Now that was an interesting reaction. She’d noticed he didn’t handle compliments very well a couple other times.

“So, uh, what are your parents doing these days?” he asked, focusing his attention on washing a steak with extreme thoroughness. Kensi hid a smile, though she continued to stare intently at the side of his face.

“My mon moved to Nevada a few years ago when she remarried and my dad still travels a lot with the military,” she explained. “Mom keeps trying to convince me to move closer, but, I don’t know. I think I’d like to settle for a little while. I’ve got friends and a good job that I don’t want to lose.”

“I don’t blame you.” Deeks sighed heavily. “As nice as it was to have a clean break, it was hard to leave everything I knew behind.”

“Well, you have new friends now,” Kensi reassured him. “LA is a big place, but the St. Bridget’s community is close knit, in case you haven’t noticed. Admittedly, a little too much sometimes,” she allowed, thinking of Nell and Candace’s ability to spread gossip faster than any form of social media. “If you ever need anything, there’s usually someone to help.”

“Thanks. I appreciate it. And everything you’ve done for me and Caleb.”

“You’re welcome.” She accepted the final plate from Deeks and quickly dried it in a few swipes of her towel before adding, “Just don’t spread it around too much, cause not everyone gets the Kensi Blye special treatment.”

“Deal,” Deeks agreed with a chuckle. “Alright, well I think that’s about it.” He pulled the plug from the drain and wiped any stray water from the counters.

“Just one more thing,” Kensi said, taking his shoulder to turn him towards her. “You have a little bit of—” she gestured to her own face before running her thumb across his upper lip to wipe away the bit of soap suds. Deeks inhaled sharply at her touch and suddenly it wasn’t quite so innocent.

She should have pulled away, but instead she lingered, enjoying the feeling of soft hair against her skin. Shifting her hand, she trailed her fingers down his cheek and saw his eyes dip to the slight V of her shirt before he caught himself and hastily pulled his gaze back up.

Kensi swayed towards him, heart beating impossibly fast as she rested her other hand on Deeks’ chest. He licked his lips, tongue darting out for a second and drawing her eyes while the tension grew between them. Kensi rose up on her toes towards him—

“Daddy?”

Deeks jerked back instantly, turning to face the sink again, and settled a hand on his hip, running his hands through his hair. He let out a sigh of frustration.

“I’m sorry,” he muttered.

“No, it’s ok,” Kensi assured him. “Let’s go see what he needs. Nodding, Deeks offered her a wry smile and made a quick retreat towards the living room.

As she followed him, Kensi couldn’t decide if she was relieved or disappointed that they’d been interrupted. For one thing, it certainly made things more complicated.

***

A/N: My apologies for the lateness. Today was my nephew’s fourth birthday party, so I spent a good part of the day there. Hope you enjoy the chapter as always and that for all your support!

#ncisla fanfiction #marty deeks #kensi blye #Caleb Deeks #lawyer deeks #teacher Kensi #In Miss Blye’s Class #Part 10 #AU #light angst #fluff #romance #self indulgent author #ejzah fanfiction

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weirdthoughtsandideas · 5 months

Text

W R I T I N G A D V E N T C A L E N D A R 2 0 2 3 D A Y 7

Prompt: Church

Aka: The Quartet is in Rome looking at a bunch of churches. Also, someone might be pregnant. But who?

Read on ao3 or under the cut.

They were on a vacation in Rome: Violetta, Francesca, Leon and Diego.

It was december, and the snow really added that extra touch to the atmosphere.

"Is it weird that I still want ice cream, even if it's cold outside?" Diego asked, letting out a chuckle.

"Not weird at all," Francesca said. "Ice cream is always delicious. Although, I more feel like tiramisu. They have a great place here!"

"You can be our guide," Leon said. "Maybe you can even show us where you grew up."

"Is her being a guide a good idea?" Diego asked, "Remember what happened in Madrid?"

"Rome is nothing like Madrid!" Francesca argued. "I know Rome. Trust me."

"I used to live here, too," Violetta told them, "Although, I was 8 and it's not really like I got out much. I remember a playground..."

"My family's old restaurant was next to a playground I played on a lot," Francesca said.

"You know... it was very long ago, but I remember having a friend. And I recall her parents had a restaurant."

"If that friend was Francesca, that would have been so cool!" Leon said.

"Yeah..." Francesca chuckled. "Although, a lot of families owned restaurants. Several of my childhood friends also had parents with a food business of some kind."

"I don't remember that girl's name," Violetta admitted. Then she let out a groan.

"What is it?" Leon asked.

"I don't know, I feel... off."

"We have been walking for a while," Diego said.

"We're almost at my aunt's house," Francesca assured them. They were all staying at her aunt's house for their trip.

They arrived a bit later, and Francesca's aunt made them a big dinner.

"This was really good!" Violetta said.

"Why thank you," Fran's aunt said with a wide smile. "Francesca, dear, are you well?"

"Pardon me, but I need to use the bathroom," Francesca admitted, standing up.

"Why? Are you sick?"

"No, I just need to go."

"Again? It's the fourth time tonight!" Diego said.

"I guess the drink just falls through me," Francesca shrugged.

She went away, as her aunt started to do a knowing "hum..." sound.

"What is it?" Violetta asked.

"She acts a bit like me, when I was pregnant with her cousin. Before I found out I was pregnant, I needed to run to the bathroom all the time, everything I drank just ran through me! That, and I feel nauseous just by walking..."

Leon and Diego glanced at Violetta.

"She could just also just have been drinking a lot..." Diego said.

"Perhaps! But you never know... tell me, who is it that she's together with? Because I know she dated that sweet boy named Marco, but that must have been a long time ago now. Who is she with now? Or is she still with Marco?"

The three of them were silent, as if they weren't sure how to reply.

Soon Francesca came back, and they all changed the subject to something else.

"I'm going to church tomorrow," her aunt said. "You can join if you want, but I figure you might want to sleep in after your long trip."

"Yes, I think so, too," Fran replied. "We might check out some churches in the city, though. There's a lot of nice ones!"

"Ooh, yes! Rome has tons of gorgeous churches!"

The next day, the four went around in Rome.

”So I knew there was churches,” Diego said, ”But I feel like there are churches in every corner!”

”Wanna go look inside one?” Francesca asked.

Everyone nodded.

”Which one should we go inside?” Leon asked, and snorted. ”There’s just so many.”

”Well…” Francesca was about to say something, but then she caught a whiff of some street food. It smelled good, but for Francesca, it suddenly made her run into the nearest church. The others ran after her, concerned.

”What happened?” Violetta asked.

”I just… felt like the smell was too strong and I felt the urge to puke… but I’m fine now.”

”I’ve felt that recently too,” Violetta admitted, ”Some smells are just… too strong.”

Leon and Diego raised their eyebrows.

They looked around in the church at all the paintings. Someone was playing an organ in the upstairs balcony. There were candles lit, and there was a christmas feeling overall.

”One time when I was a child, I sang in a church,” Francesca told them. ”It was a children’s christmas choir. It was one of the first times I sang in front of people.”

”I did that, too!” Diego admitted.

”I always found church choirs so beautiful,” Violetta said. She hummed a little bit, although she did not want to be too loud. Then she suddenly stared into thin air.

”What is it?” Leon asked.

”I’m really craving pasta. Like, really craving it.”

”All of a sudden?”

”Yeah.”

Everyone chuckled.

”Well, there’s some restaurants close by,” Francesca said, ”Let’s go.”

Violetta was almost devouring her pasta. The others almost got concerned.

”I’m so hungry!” she said, ”I don’t know why… there’s something that tells me to eat all the time.”

”Maybe it’s Rome,” Diego suggested, ”Italy has one of the best food cultures in the world.”

”Yeah…” Leon said, ”Or…”

”Or what?” Francesca asked.

”Or… I don’t know.”

”I feel nauseous again…” Francesca admitted.

"Maybe you have a virus?" Violetta suggested.

"I hope not... I don't wanna get sick while we're on this trip."

Soon after they finished eating, Violetta also started to feel nauseous. Although, they all concluded it could simply be because she ate so much.

But both Leon and Diego started getting suspicious that there was something more going on. They weren't sure if they should mention it, or just stay silent until either Violetta and Francesca said something.

Violetta and Francesca did act secretive - they where exchanging whispers, giggles and sometimes walked away in a corner so no one would hear them. Although, it could just be girls gossiping, and there was nothing more to it.

Leon woke up the next morning, by sounds from a nearby church. Fran's aunt had mentioned something about a funeral they had there quite early in the morning.

He walked outside, about to head down to eat breakfast. But then, Diego came up and grabbed him into the bathroom.

"Hey, what's up?"

"Dude, I... I found something..."

"What?"

Diego brought out a pregnancy test. Not only that, but a positive one.

"I found it on the floor in the hallway. Someone must have dropped it."

"Who's is it?" Leon asked.

Diego shrugged. "It could be any of them. Right?"

"Yeah..."

They decided to find the girls, and figure this out...

I don't know why my Violetta oneshots have been sort of connected lately. Originally they were in Rome because I was in Rome earlier this year, and so I had a reference with the churches. We'll see if I keep that up for the rest of this writing calendar. It's not stated who dates who, or if all four of them are just going on this trip as friends... or if all four are dating each other. It's up to you to decide. Comment who you think might be pregnant :)

#2023 Writing DCLA+ advent calendar #violetta #write a comment who you think is pregnant! :)

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talesfromsiteredacted · 1 year

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SCP: Standard Cooking Protocols

As part of the new Enrichment Protocols, I'm tasked with giving a cooking lesson to 053, Evie. Today's lesson: Papa Snow's Anomalously Delicious Chocolate Chunk Cookies. Since my favorite niece can barely see the counter, never mind work an oven, she's sitting on a stool handing the premeasured ingredients to me.

It's early afternoon, and the first activity in the new division is underway. Evie wanted to know how my dad taught me to bake her favorite cookies, so I'm showing her. We're in the staff breakroom kitchen, both in lemon print aprons. I tied Evie's hair back in pigtails, no one likes hair in their cookies, least of all our big cranky reptile buddy. Once I pin my hair into a messy bun, we get to work. I've measured out all the stuff from flour to vanilla, in the exact amounts, most of it in plastic bags except the eggs.

"Okay, first we need the sugar and the butter. Add a splash of vanilla, and I'll whip the whole thing up. That's step one."

"Why the sugar and butter first?" Evie asks as I add the sweet powder to the dairy component. As I blend it, I explain.

"By mixing the so-called wet stuff first, we can get it more evenly mixed. Pretty sure not everybody is into big hunks of butter in their cookie dough." Once I'm satisfied, I move to the next part. Evie passes the eggs and vanilla, and I pour the brown liquid in.

"The trick to not getting shell in the bowl is just crack them gently on a flat surface, then bend back the shell." I show her Dad's method. No shell, no problem! In they go, a-one, a-two, then more mixing.

"Can you eat eggshells?"

"You can, but I think they're a bit too crunchy to catch on as a snack." I check the recipe. Ah, the dry phase can begin.

"Flour, please." Evie hand over the largest sack, I snip off a corner with scissors and use the open tip to funnel the flour in. It's an advantage to premeasuring, even if doing it is a pain in the buns. Even so, there's still a bit of stray flour before I'm done. The rest of the powdery stuff goes in next, baking soda and a tiny bit of salt.

"Why add the salt?"

"It brings out the sweet in the cookie, makes it taste better. This stuff was once so valuable the Romans used it to pay the army. That was before refrigeration was a big thing, and there wasn't ice around. It preserves food too. Just don't go eating a lot of salted meat without water, it dries your mouth out a little too much." I turn to my eager assistant. "I've been doing all the work here, wanna dump in the chocolate chunks for me? Just pull the top open, and let them rip." Evie pours in the chunks, I start stirring again. As I do, I ask her a question.

"So, Most Trusted and Best Baker's Helper Ever, what do we do with all these cookies once they're baked and cool?"

"We eat some, silly!"

"We eat all these, we'll be sick. Maybe one or two for right now, then we box the rest up to share with Mr. Lizard later, during storytime? I'm sure the big guy likes a good cookie too."

"Well, there is a lot of them. Maybe someone else needs a cookie too. Ooh! 999! He loves cookies. Why don't we save him some?"

"Great idea, Evie. Wanna hear a secret? I heard one of our new hires, Dr. Miller hasn't had a cookie in a while. I'll take her some on my way to see some of the Keters. I do have to drop off a dozen to 682, after all." I look at the bowl, yep. We have achieved dough. Time to bake. This is the part Evie shouldn't be too involved with as a kid, that oven is hot. So, time for a visit to Nook's Cranny while Auntie Rabbit finishes the job and tidies up.

"Okay, break time, Evie. It's going to be a while before the final product, so why not check out your village? I have the game set, have fun. Say hi to Bob for me."

She starts playing my DS while I handle the rest. Before long, everything is done, including the dishes. Evie looks up.

"All done so soon?"

"Yep. I learned to clean up as I go, leaves more time for fun that way. The cookies are almost ready to be packed up. But... there's the final step. This is the most important part, okay? So, total honestly here. Are you ready for the final test?"

"What is it?"

"We each eat one, and say if it's tasty or not. This was the part Dad told me was both the best and hardest, judging what you made. Ready? Here comes phase one test. Evie, start your chompers!" She giggles as I hand her a fresh cookie. She takes her first bite, and that huge smile tells me we have succeeded. As she's devouring the test sample, a familiar orange gelatinous mound of glee wobbles in, lured by the scent of fresh cookies.

"Hey, 999? Mind running an unauthorized test for us?" I hand him a cookie, placing it on his top. It sinks in, he chirps in happiness. "Okay, test successful. We have made some very good cookies." We box up most of the rest to be shared, but we all take just one more cookie each.

#scp foundation #tales from site redacted #dr rabbit #scp 053 #scp 999

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sweetmistuuux · 2 years

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Sweet as Pie

Mitsuri Kanroji x Fem!Reader

This is actually my first post lmao so I hope it does well, I love Mitsuri <3

Mitsuri Kanroji, Your Best Friend. She's one of the prettiest in the School. And your best friend since 6th grade. You where a student before she transferred, and ever since you laid eyes on her, you fell in love with her. She was the definition of beautiful in the inside and outside. She was so kind and saw only the good in everyone. She was always there for you to cheer you up in anyway possible. And that's why you fell for her. Now you both are living together in a dorm. You both started college 4 months ago and it's been going great, especially because you get to share a dorm with your best friend in the world.

"Y/n-san! Y/n-san!" You heard your best friend call your name. "Hey Mitsuri-san! What's up?" You ask. "I found a recipe for a food named pie! They have different types of pies! Apple pie, pumpkin pie, cherry pie, even lemon pie!! Would you like to try baking pie with me?" She said with a pleading face. You being well you, could never say no to her. "Well of course Mitsuri-san!" You agree "Eek! Let's go Y/n-san!" She said as she pulls your sleeve.

"Alright! We need to get some strawberries and then whipped cream! And sugar, cornstarch, pie crust, water, and strawberry gelatin!" Mitsuri says reading a list. "Do we have everything?" She turns to you. "Yeah, we're all set!" You say. "Alright! Now let me preheat the oven." "Okay!~ while you do that I'll unroll the pie crust and prepare it." Mitsuri says happily. "Okay now let me put the ingredient together, let's see the recipe book says to combine the sugar, cornstarch, and water to a small saucepan until its smooth." You say as to turn back to the ingredients.

As you do that you hear a little yelp. You quickly turn around to see Mitsuri sucking her index finger. You quickly go towards her. "Mitsuri-san! Are you okay?" You say worried. "Ah! Yes Y/n-san, I just accidentally burned my finger." She says. "Ah okay, be more careful next time I don't want you hurt." You say. "I will don't worry Y/n-chan!" She says smiling. You turn to continue mixing the ingredients. Then you were finished and started to boil them until it thickens. "Y/n-san the crust is ready can I arrange the strawberries?" Mitsuri asks. "Yeah sure the gelatin is done I just gotta put it in the fridge to let it cool." You say as you put the gelatin in the fridge. "Hehe thank you!" She says. A few minutes pass and then you take out the gelatin and start to pour the strawberry gelatin onto the gelatin. "Alright the strawberry gelatin is done." You say turning around with the pot in your hands. "Wanna pour it?" You ask "Yes please!" She says as you pass the pot to her. "Alright after you pour it put it in the fridge to let it cool, then I'll grab the whipped cream." You say.

A few minutes pass. You then decide the pie is probably cool enough so you take it out and ask Mitsuri to get the whipped cream. "You wanna put the whipped cream?" You ask Mitsuri. "Mhm!" She nods. "Alright!" You say ask Mitsuri starts to put the whipped cream trying to keep her hands steady as to not mess up. "Andd~ there!" She says proud of herself. You laugh a little then look at the pie. "It looks amazing!." You say also proud that you and Mitsuri were able to make a whole pie. As you look back at her you see her eating a bit of whipped cream. You chuckle at her. "Mitsuri-san you got a little something on your face." You say as you point at her chin. She wipes her face with her sleeve. "Did I get it?" She asks as she put some on her noise and up her cheek. "Here I'll get that for you." You says as you grab a napkin from the counter and clean her face. She giggles at you and you smile back. "Well should we eat the pie?" You ask. "Yes!!" She says already grabbing a plate for you and her.

You both take a slice and you both try it out and absolutely love it. "It's so delicious!" You say. "Agreed!!" Mitsuri says taking even more bigger and bigger bites. You laugh at her and turn on the TV to watch something. You finally find finished your pie slice and when you went back to the pie to grab another piece you see that there's only one slice left. "Uh, Mitsuri-san did you finish almost the whole pie?" You turn to her and she looks at you with a sadden expression. "Ah!! I'm sorry I was just so hungry!" She says. You then take the last pie slice. "Say how about we both share the last slice?" You say. "Really??" She says. "Yeah, come sit closer to me." You say as you pat the side of you. She quickly goes over to you and you grab some pie with your fork and put it to Mitsuri's mouth. She blushes at the fact that your going to feed her. "Hm? Mitsuri-san, are you blushing?" You ask her. "Ah! Y/n-san it's just that it's embarrassing being fed!" She says covering her blushing face. You laugh a little. "Well if your going to blush let me see your face! Your adorable when you blush you know." You tell her. She looks back at you with a even red face. "Y/n-san!! You know those types of complements make me blush!" She says. "Hehe, anyway are you going to take a bite?" You ask her. "Ah! Yes!" She says leaning to take a bite. She takes the bite and looks at you with a red face while eating.

While she finished eating her pie, you lean to kiss her. "Y/N-SAN??!!" She says backing away with a very red face. "What? You wanted me to kiss you no?" You say with a smile. "I-I WELL-" She says looking all over the room. "You know what I just realized." You tell her. "W-what?" She asks. "You tasted just like the pie, but sweeter. Who knew if I just wanted pie, I would have just went to you, hehe." You say laughing. "Y/N-SAN!!!" Mitsuri yells blushing. "I'm only kidding! But, for real your just as sweet as the pie. If only I could have kissed you sooner." You say. "W-well if I must admit you have very soft lips..." Mitsuri says looking at the floor. "Why thank you hehe." You say also blushing. "Soo do you wanna, you know go out?" You say. "S-sure." Mitsuri says as she gets closer to you and hugs your arm. "Wanna watch The Princess and the Frog?" You ask "Sure!" Mitsuri replys with.

#mitsuri kanroji #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #wlw #anime #f reader #mitsuri #kanroji #mitsuri x reader #kimetsu mitsuri #fanfic

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needs-to-stop-looking-at-valves · 2 years

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Can we get more Luisa smut? (my favorite one u wrote was when she went to get a massage)

You absolutely can! Let's see what I can give my lesbians today!

(Next time ill do some Luisa with a guy, i just kinda feel like i don't feed the lesbians enough)

(Also thank you, I AM kinda proud of that one)

"Luisa! You didn't have to, really!"

"No no, it's cool, I do it all the time!"

Luisa had been making friends outside of the Encanto ever since it opened up. In this case, as she moved one cow from one pen to another, she was making friends with Mr. Daire's daughter, Annabelle. She was a pretty lady. A bit short, pink little lips, cute cheeks, little pigtails. She was short too, with...well, there was nothing wrong with THINKING these things right? She had a large chest. Like. Really large, it was kinda hard to ignore it. Suffice to say Luisa found her adorable. Not that she'd say anything, obviously. It was his daughter. Even if they were the same age. Even if she wasn't married or that she really liked her.

She smiled as Luisa put the last cow in the pen with a huff.

"Well, thank you, then. I'd move them myself, but they're mighty heavy, and stubborn as stubborn could get."

"Hey, they're nothing on donkey's, lemme tell you."

Luisa chuckled as she closed the pen, and looked towards the horizon. Sun would be setting soon, she should go home.

"Well, that's done. I should be heading back-"

"Wait! If it's uh, not too much trouble, could you stay? This is the first time I've been home alone, and Papa isn't back yet. Just so I can feel safe? Please?"

Luisa shouldn't be left alone with such a pretty, helpless lady. She wasn't a deviant or anything, but looking at those begging eyes gave her...thoughts. But, never wanting to disappoint people, she nodded.

"Alright, just till he gets back-"

"Perfect! I can give you a snack while I'm at it, for all the hard work you've done!"

She'd never been in their house, come to think of it. It was nice, if a bit different than what she was used to. Apparently owning a dairy farm put you in good standing. Go figure. Annabelle had her sit down at the table, before giving her some snacks. Bread with butter and jams, some muffins, sliced cheese, and of course, a cup of milk. Luisa hesitated.

"This is all super nice, but I'd hate to eat you out of house and home-"

"No no! You sit at the table, you eat properly on it. Please, go on."

Luisa shrugged, before helping herself. Everything was fresh, delicious, as one would expect.

"Mmmph- it's all REALLY good. You make all of this?"

"Mmhm! Even the cheese. Papa says a woman should know how to make proper cheese. Namely for a husband. Even though I can't say I wanna GET married..."

The frown on her face could melt the coldest of hearts. Luisa put down the food, and reached out to hold her little hand.

"Hey. I'm sorry you got that pressure on you. Really I do. I get what it's like. But just know, he shouldn't make you feel like you have to. No one should."

She smiled, bringing her hand up to her lips, and kissing it. Her lips were so small and soft, she couldn't stand it.

"You're so kind Luisa. I wanna get married to someone like you one day."

She knew her face erupted in blush, she could feel it, and even hear it in her awkward chuckle.

"No, you don't mean that-"

"Oh but I do!"

Annabelle scooted closer to put her hand on her bicep, letting her hands wander and admire.

"I'd wanna marry someone kind like you. Someone strong, and sweet, and...pretty."

Don't ask how it happened. Don't ask how this little lady was suddenly standing there, hands on her muscles, with her eyes looking longingly into hers. And definitely don't ask how she leaned in to kiss her. Don't ask how such a pretty lady ended up on her lap, and certainly don't ask how Luisa's hands ended up on her pretty little thighs.

"I...really shouldn't be doing this here-"

"You could take me upstairs?"

Thats not at all what she meant. But who was she to say no? She carried her effortlessly up the steps, into her room, and almost yelped when Annabelle yanked her into bed with her. She crawled onto Luisa's lap, her voice sweet as cream as she helped Luisa peel off her clothes.

"You're so pretty, Luisa. I always looked at you through my window when papa had you help in the fields. You look so good in my bed."

Despite the size difference, Annabelle made it VERY clear that she wanted to take the reins. Not that Luisa minded, she liked being pampered, thruth be told.

"I didn't uh, know you felt that way about me. Kinda wish I knew earlier."

"So we could've been doing this sooner?"

She giggled, leaning in for a second to pepper her neck in little kisses. Luisa, ever the sensitive girl, squirmed under her touch, liking how she was being kissed, just a bit too much. Listen, Luisa had just the weakest spot for cute girls who admired her strength, could you blame her?

"I just, well I mean, sort of? Not that it's ALL I see when I see girls, obviously, I'm...I'm just rambling."

She felt her mouth clamp shut however, upon realizing they were both in their under clothes. She moved FAST for a seemingly innocent little lady.

"S'okay. I like your ramblin', and I like you."

She kissed her nose. Then her lips, then her chin, her neck, her chest, right between her breasts, before seeming to stop at her stomach. Annabelle just looked so cute, leaving lipstick marks in her wake and having her cute butt in the air. Luisa liked a lot of things about girls, and their ability to be so cute was one of many reasons. Her little hands softly parted her legs, and she let her little hands roam, in fascination.

"Your legs are so pretty. And so soft too..."

She sounded distracted as she started to kiss them. Lips leaving little streaks of pink in their wake, and Luisa had to force herself to keep them open.

"You uh, shouldn't talk like that. I mean it's sweet, and I like it, like a LOT-"

"But it's making you wet, isn't it?"

Luisa was starting to think she wasn't as innocent as she let off. But as her little hand rubbed her through her panties, she realized she didn’t care.

"Y-yeah. And then I'll...cum, and I make like, this really weird face when I cum-"

"I want to see it."

Luisa shouldn't be doing this. But she watched as she sat up, and stripped herself of her underwear. A cute amount of hair, and like the rest of her body, it was full, voluptuous. Luisa felt herself internally screaming as it was suddenly pressed up against her lips, and the legs wrapped around her face.

"I wanna see it from up here. From between my thighs. Please, Luisa. I know you like helping people, help me."

Annabelle leaned back a bit, reaching past Luisa's underwear, and starting to rub at her folds. Luisa couldn't help it anymore. Women just smelled so sweet and nice, all while still smelling like sweat and nerves. Luisa clung to her thighs, and started to lick and suck at the pussy presented to her. Shit, she even tasted good, borderline indulgent. Annabelle squirmed above her, moving her hips a bit to push her towards her.

"Oh...Luisa. You're so good to me. You're so pretty and nice and special to me. You're the only one I've wanted to touch me like this. I feel so safe with you. So cared for..."

Luisa wasn't just getting wet from her fingers, she was getting it from the compliments and the praise. Luisa didn't get compliments often. Least, not like these. Usually it's just about her being strong or helpful. But no. Here, she was pretty, and she was nice.

"And I wanna look at you all day. I wanna look at you, and hold your arm like I'm y-yours and I want to kiss you over and over and-oh fuck Luisa you're so good at this-!"

She was unraveling the poor thing. It wasn't Luisa's fault though. The juices that flowed onto her tongue shouldn't be so sweet. Her tongue exploring every inch of those pretty folds shouldn't have felt so good and felt so right. It even felt good, muffling her own moans in that pink little pussy.

"Luisa please, rub this spot too, I promise I'm getting closer!"

She guided Luisa's hand to her clit, and Luisa obeyed, rubbing it in little circles, and making her whine as if she was being too much for her. Annabelle had such a pretty face when it was this flustered. Luisa would've considered her innocent, had she not pulled up her bra to reveal her tits, with a giant smirk. Luisa felt herself getting closer, just from watching them bounce a bit with every movement. Consider her a cliché, but Luisa always did prefer bigger breasts. They just looked so lovely and comforting, like you could take a nap on them.

"Hold...still...imma drop you..."

Luisa muttered against her, making Annabelle whine even further.

"I c-can't, I've...never had this done before, and I want more. I've...always wanted pretty Luisa to eat my little pussy, I knew you had a pretty tongue Luisa, I knew it!"

Luisa should've been a pinch more gentle, but this girl was currently fingering the hell out of her own pussy, and she wanted to just cum for her already. She squeezed a bit into her skin, and ate her way right into her heart. She used her lips to suck on her already soaked clit, used her tongue to push inside of her and fuck her with it. Her walls were so tight, she knew it was all unexplored territory for the poor girl. It overwhelmed her so much, she put both her hands on the headboard, and started to buck against Luisa's face.

"Shit shit SHIT! Luisa, right there, please please please, I'm-!"

She didn't get to finish as she tossed her pretty head back, and came. She squeezed Luisa's face with her thighs, and now, Luisa could kinda see why people always asked that from HER. Annabelle was apparently so overwhelmed, she fell right over to the other side of the bed, flushed and panting. Luisa wiped the cum from her mouth with the back of her hand, chuckling.

"You happy?"

"I...I think I was seein' stars. You felt SO good...~"

Luisa chuckled, sitting up and about to get her clothes on, when Annabelle grabbed her hand.

"I'm sorry, you didn't finish. Do you...uhm...want to...?"

"Want to what?"

She watched as Annabelle rolled over to her, till she was laying on her chest, her own breasts against hers. She had such pretty eyes too.

"I don't know. What does LUISA want? You're so pretty and wonderful, I want what makes YOU feel good."

Luisa thought about it for a moment, before leaning in just a bit closer.

"I...I wanna kiss you. A lot. Kissing...really gets me wet."

Luisa wasn't the best at dirty talk, but from her smirk, something told her she didn't mind at all.

"Okay, I'll kiss you. I'll kiss the pretty lady till she feels so good, she can hardly stand it."

One kiss. Two. Three. Four. Five. All of them earnest, and tasting faintly of berries and cream. She wanted so much more. Wanted her tongue deep in her mouth and-

"Annabelle! Girl, where are you?!"

She suddenly jumped and stared at the door.

"Oh he's back he's back- quick, put your clothes on- Luisa is helping me move my dresser, papa! I lost something under there!"

"Well good! Thought you were messin' with some boy for a minute!"

Luisa got dressed quickly, and was about to head downstairs, when Annabelle took her hands in hers.

"He'd be mad if he found out about this."

"About you liking girls?"

"That you took my virginity. I was supposed to save it, but I...I REALLY like you. And next time you come over, I wanna do it again. I want to do a LOT of this again."

Luisa leaned down to kiss her lips, before nodding.

"You will. I promise."

Luisa didn't know how she made it home without losing her entire mind. But when she did make it home, she sat at the dining room table with her sister's (and tìo Bruno), and face planted onto the wooden surface. Isa frowned, tapping her sister's shoulder.

"Luisa? You okay?"

"Why are girls so H O T?!"

"No clue. But I thought you liked guys?"

"I like guys too-WHY IS EVERYONE HOT?!"

Bruno looked up from his sketch for only a second, before returning to his work.

"Global warming."

#not transformers #asks #encanto #lemon #am i sold on her being official for Luisa? no not really #but Luisa deserves to have flings if she wants

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3xm-draconic · 2 years

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Jojo's Bizarre little Adventure part 12 Birthday Arc (p3 of 3)

Chapter 12: Party at Apartment 9 & 3/4 (Birthday Arc p3).

“So you just want me to watch them and alert you if they're planning an attack?, ok I'm on it” Koichi hung up his phone and turned to Yukako “hey Jotaro’s daughter called me and asked if I could watch a group of villains to see what they’re up to, do you wanna help?”, Yukako squealed “a spy date, how exciting!”

For most of the decorations that were not DIY, the villains shopped at the local PartyCity, it had tons of stuff. There Santana and Pucci got golden goblets, utensils and plates, chocolate coins and costumes for everyone.

DIO, Karz and Funny all had fun wandering around the store and looking at costumes, props and things, Funny lost his mind over all the napkin options, especially the american flag printed ones, he loved those and almost bought some just for himself. After check out it was back into the car and to the grocery store for the food and craft supplies.

“Koichi it looks like they’re planning a party” Yukako whispered to him as they watched from the next aisle over, “yeah…but what could they be celebrating?”, “I don’t know maybe- oh shit they’re coming this way act casual!” Yukako and Koichi turned away from the band of villains and pretended to be shopping for pasta while listening in on them.

“Ok that’s almost everything on the list, all we need now is the cake” Valentine said as he marked party food off the list, “I’ll call Diego and ask him if he could go down to the bakery Doppio works at and let Mirtillo pick out a cake” Pucci told Valentine as he fished his phone out of his pocket “plus Doppio can use his employee discount”, “that would save us some money, we already spent 236$ on this party” Valentine added as he checked the budget, they only had 150$ left for Mirtillo’s gifts, “it’s a big party, we don’t get to throw a big party like this very often, it’s ok splurge a little” DIO grinned as he loaded a 24 pack of 7up into their minivan, “I agree, it’s been centuries since I’ve been to large celebration” Karz nodded to DIO.

Diego got Pucci’s call and was on his way to the bakery Doppio worked at with Mirtillo to have her pick out what kind of cake flavor she wanted, he put on his green dinosaur hoodie so Mirtillo could hide in his hood and still be able to see things as they walked “how you doing up there funsize?” Diego whispered to her as she peaked out from behind a lock of his saffron yellow hair, “fine, I can see everything from up here!” she squeaked gleefully.

It was a sunny day and every flower in a ten mile radius was in full bloom, it was hell on Diego’s allergies but pretty none the less, “HEY TRIASSIC TURKEY, WHATCHA' UP TO?” an all too familiar voice cackled, “oh for fuck sake” Diego grumbled “not him, anyone but him”. Diego carefully tucked Mirtillo into the back of his hood before turning to face him, that insufferable gold-toothed git Gyro Zeppeli, “what do you want?” Diego hissed at him, “nothing I just saw you walking and wondered what you were doing, you don’t really go places by yourself. I always see you with HP or the other morons you live with” he said flatly.

Diego rolled his eyes and tried to walk away but Gyro followed him, “so what are ya up to?”, “I'm headed to a bakery where one of my roommates work at to pick out a birthday cake flavor”, “oh cool, who’s birthday is it?” Gyro pestered, “none of your business, you ain't’ invited so you don’t need to know” Diego growled back and bared his fangs, Gyro relented from questioning him any further but followed him to the bakery anyway, he wanted to see if their cannolis were any good.

The Bakery was a cute little place with a pastel yellow and green fairy garden aesthetic to it, it had large windows in the front to show off many delicious confections. Inside was a large counter showing off all the pastries they specialized in, everything from cakes to cookies, pies to cupcakes and macarons were on full display. To top it all off it smelled heavenly in there, the scents of rich chocolates, fresh fruits and imported ripe vanilla beans permeated the air, Diego envied Doppio now, the cheerful dork had the best job ever working here.

“Hey Doppio can I get a sample of some cake flavors?” Diego asked, the bubblegum-pink haired italian looked up from the counter to see his jurassic jockey friend had come in and with him, peeking out behind a lock of his hair was Mirtillo. “Sure Diego, I’ll bring out the list of flavors for you to pick from and bring out a sample for you to try”.

Diego took a seat at one of the tables facing away from Gyro and looked at the list with Mirtillo, she picked red velvet cake, lemon cake and angel food cake. “I’ve never had cake before, I usually ate honey bread on my birthdays when I lived with my family, does it taste good Mr Diego?” Mirtillo asked him timidly, “yeah it’s really good, you’ll like it” he whispered back, trying not to attract Gyro’s attention. When Doppio arrived with the samples he also brought some frosting flavors to try with them, there was sea salt-caramel cheesecake frosting, white chocolate french-vanilla buttercream and dark chocolate swiss buttercream.

Mirtillo absolutely loved the red velvet and lemon pound cake with a mix of the white chocolate buttercream and cheesecake frostings, “this is amazing! I thought honey was the sweetest thing I’ve ever eaten but this is even better!” Mirtillo whispered enthusiastically. Diego filled out an order for the cake and bought a 6 pack of macarons, each with a different flavor to share with Mirtillo on their walk back home.

Meanwhile Doppio got to work on Mirtillo’s birthday cake, he decided to make it a three layer cake with the top and bottom layers being blue velvet cake instead of red and lemon pound cake in the middle. Inside would be the sea salt-caramel cheesecake frosting with edible blue glitter mixed in and outside the cake would be covered in the white chocolate french-vanilla buttercream. The theme was Harry Potter so Doppio decided to make the cake look like a giant golden snitch complete with wafer paper wings covered in edible gold paint, “ooh this is so pretty! Mirtillo is going to love it!” Doppio grinned.

Diego got another call from Pucci telling him to drop Mirtillo off with Esidise and Wammu while they decorate the apartment as they want Mirtillo to be surprised. Diego headed over to the pillarmen apartment and left Mirtillo with them and said Santana would bring her to the party in about 20 minutes.

When Santana arrived to pick Mirtillo and his fellow pillars up he came dressed as Hagrid and had a strange snow owl with magenta eyes on his shoulder, the owl held a wax-sealed letter in it’s beak that it gave to Mirtillo, letter wished her a happy birthday and inside was instructions to head to platform 9 & ¾, a.k.a their apartment. They walked over and discovered that the front door looked like it had been bricked up but it was actually just a large poster with a cut down the middle and painted to look like bricks, Santana and Mirtillo walked through and entered the apartment.

Inside the apartment was decorated with battery-powered candles and tinny keys with wings on them suspended from the ceiling with translucent wire to give the illusion of levitation, colorful house banners hung from the walls and the coffee table was covered in an array of sweets. There were liquorice sticks, gummy worms, boxes of jelly beans, chocolate frogs and chocolate coins, there was a wooden board covered in all kinds of snacks as well like little broomsticks made of pretzels and string cheese, crackers with little pointy hats on them made of cheese and salami, olives in a bowl labeled “eyes of newt” surrounded by grapes and deviled eggs. A feast was on the dining table as well. There were fries, chicken wings, corn on the cob, sausages, roasted brussel sprouts, garlic bread, macaroni n’ cheese and in the center of it all was the giant golden snitch cake.

All the villains gathered together and shouted “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” to Mirtillo, Diego had turned into Scary Monsters and was wearing fake dragon wings and horns, he blew on a party horn that had red, yellow and orange streamers on it which made him look like a dragon.

Mirtillo squeaked excitedly, she was amazed by everything “this is so cool!” she shouted, Mirtillo watched astounded as the owl that was on Santan’s shoulder transformed into Karz the same way the cat had turned into Mcgonagall, “well what are we all standing around for this is a party is it not?, let’s have some fun!” he announced mirthfully as Valentine turned on the party music.

Mirtillo got to meet some of the friends of the villains, she was introduced to Hol Horse and Vanilla Ice by DIO, Diego showed her to Hotpants and Valentine showed her to Blackmore. All of the party guests enjoyed activities like quidditch but with soda pong (alcohol was not allowed at the party) and a PG version of cards against humanity.

The party was great, even Diavolo quite being grumpy and enjoyed it, “now before we sit down for the movie marathon Santana and I created a fun quiz to sort everyone into their hogwarts houses” Pucci said ecstatically as he brought out a chair, witch hat and several hogwarts house themed scarves for everyone, including a tiny hat and tiny scarves for Mirtillo. Mirtillo decided to go last as she wanted to know what everyone’s house would be before her own, Esidisi and Kira were in Ravenclaw with Pucci and Santana. Doppio, Vanilla Ice and Blackmore got Hufflepuff. DIO, Karz, Diego and Diavolo are Slytherins and Hotpants, Wammu, Hol Horse and Valentine got placed in Gryffindor. It was now Mirtillo’s turn, Mirttio was placed on the seat of the chair and the tiny witch hat was gently put on her head, Pucci asked her the quiz questions and she answered each one honestly, “your in…GRYFFINDOR!” Pucci announced happily as he carefully picked her up, gave her a mini red and gold scarf to wear and gave her to Valentine who was absolutely ecstatic. “Alright everyone, movie time!” Pucci said as he brought out his movie collection.

After the marathon all the villains brought out the gifts they got for Mirtillo, they tried to put them in small enough boxes but some were still a bit too big, Pucci’s gift was a hundred color pencil tips and a mini sketch book, DIO got her a bejeweled gold ring to wear as a belt, Doppio gave her a little blue doll dress, and a mini tea set Diavolo didn't bother to get her anything so he gave her a handful of jelly beans, Diego’s gift was a mini coin purse she could use as a backpack, Karz gave her a little pendant necklace with an mini astrantia flower preserved in resin on it, Kira gave her own mini radio and Valentine gave her a mini stuffed toy rabbit that resembled his stand D4C.

Mirtillo hugged her new stuffed toy and began to cry “my momma made me a toy kinda like this…Sting tore it apart…I..I love this one, he smells so sweet, thank you!” she sobbed, tears of joy running down her face.

“So all they were doing was getting party supplies?” Joseph said while scratching his head, “yep that’s all Yukako and I saw” Koichi replied after taking a sip of soda from his glass, “they said something about someone’s birthday” Yukako added. Jolyne sighed “I guess we overreacted”, “maybe not, I sent Gyro to go bug Diego, that pompous scaly asshole might slip up and tell him something” Johnny interjected, at that moment Gyro walked in caring a large box of cannolis, the confection’s cream filling was smeared across his face, “so you find anything out Gyro?”, “GUMHUGMURUFF”, “don’t talk with your mouth full” Johnny goaned, Gyro swallowed hard with an audible gulp “I got nothing, I followed him to this bakery where he said he was there to try birthday cake flavors and that was it…they make some damn good cannoli there too!” Gyro mused as he ate another.

Johnny grumbled in frustration, “hello everyone, how are all of you?” Jonathan said as he returned to the apartment “oh Gyro brought cannoli, may I have one?”, Gyro nodded and handed the big Jostar one, “why do all of you look so glum?” Jonathan asked the group, “the villains looked like they were up to something turns out their just throwing a birthday for one of them” Joseph shrugged and grabbed a cannoli, “oh that's odd” Jonathan said raising an eyebrow “I’ve come to know all their birthdays while working at the Library, you half to put your birthday down on the library card application, so far I know none of them have a birthday in july”, Johnny nearly fell out of his wheelchair as he screamed “I KNEW IT, THEY'RE UP TO SOMETHING!”

#jjba #g/t #jojo bizarre adventure #jojos bizarre little adventure #harry potter #birthday party

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twsted-princess · 2 years

Note

(Cmon) Osyron being done with Jason being annoying to him

(Eat) Quora Prom

(Water kiss) cause what I drawn again made me stuck at James Carol again sorry

You got it!!

Osyron stared out at the blue ocean, the seagulls in the distance squawking loudly as the waves crashed onto the shore. The sun was high above him and the breeze was nice against his long hair. He sighed, relaxing in his chair as he took a sip of a fruity cocktail the human at the snack bar gave him for free. (it wasn't free he was just very intimidating) It was called a 'pina colada' if he remembered correctly. Truly this would be a lovely day at the beach.........almost. "Sunshiiiiine!! The water's fine come on in!!" Right, that idiot. Jason was here too, already prancing around in the water trying to get their attention. He kept slurping his drink hoping the fool would take the hint but no. The action star headed out the water and toward his boyfriend, his tanned skin dripping wet. "Ya know sitting on the beach looking fine as hell is good and all but you haven't moved at all. I wanna swim with you!" Jason asked politely but Osyron just stared off towards the sea. "I'll move when I feel like it." The actor sighed but soon a glint got into his eyes. "Really? Ooooor are you being a chicken?" Osyron turned to Jason, a little smirk spreading across his dumb face as they look in anger. "Excuse me?" "Well I was expecting a sun deity to not be afraid of some water but I guess that's the case~" That sun deity rose to his feet, now staring down his partner is a frightening look on his face. He wasn't gonna kick them straight into the ocean right...............................Right?

"You're getting pretty good at swimming Prom!!" Quora smiled at her partner as the two sat on the ledge of the pool. Prometheus smiled back as he lightly kicked their legs, watching the water swirl around. "Thank you. It is thanks to you that I have learned so much." They did come a long way. Before they dropped like a rock the moment she introduced them to swimming but now he can do all the basic strokes fairly easily. "Aaaaw it's nothing really." She blushed, rubbing the back of her head with a grin. Prom continued to stare at her, clad in a bright blue bikini with small images of hamburgers, hotdogs, french fries and little squiggles of ketchup and mustard decorated throughout the swimwear. When she noticed them looking at her with an adoring gaze in their eyes her cheeks turned redder then her hair. "A- Anyways I'm hungry! Let's check out the snack shack!" They nodded and soon Quora was back to her normal self. Drooling over what they have to offer for food. Cheeseburgers, chili dogs, nachos, fish tacos, club sandwiches stacked high with all sorts of deliciousness. "What do you wanna get?" She looked over to Prom who placed their finger on their chin and thought it over. "How about...this?" They point to the Fishermen's Platter. Calamari, coconut shrimp, fried clam strips and two fish tacos with a side of fries. "That way, we will be able to share." Quora grinned. "Fine with me!!" After getting their lunch along with some slushies they sat back down by the pool, happy and content with how this summer day is going.

The sun was warm and the sea was cool, but with Carol everything was nice. James thought to himself as he swam alongside his beloved girlfriend. This beach trip was going well. Melanie and Fabio were walking along the shore picking up shells, rocks, beach glass or anything that caught the eye. Petva was currently being buried by a giggling Lyla while they were snoring away and from the looks of it Regina was back with some frozen treats. But that could wait. The sea was calm so there wasn't any big waves to come hurdling in as James swam closer to Carol. God she looked so pretty. Once he got close she turned to him. "Oh! James you almost-!" He then tugged her close and kissed her. She tasted sweet from the virgin margarita she had before coming in. When he pulled away he chuckled at her expression. "Sorry, you looked too pretty." Once she snapped back into reality she then pulled him into the waters below to kiss him. They stayed like this, drifting along and sharing kisses until they almost felt like prunes as they giggled.

#my work #twst oc's #twisted wonderland

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ramblings-of-1-mad-woman · 4 months

Text

Last week of December 2023

Ramblings of a Mad Woman

12/28/23

Hi, and welcome to Ramblings of a Mad Woman. I’m a woman, and I'm mad. Today I’ll be taking you through my headspace -- Are you sitting down? You might want to sit down. Maybe grab a cool drink. Here we go.

I woke up today at 5:30am, and I was hungry. The kind of hunger where your belly feels like it’s running on the fumes of stomach acid and water vapor. So, I got up and made myself a bowl of Frosted Flakes and moved to the couch. As soon as I sat down, a deluge of thoughts washed over me.

Youdidn’tsleep,tsktsk,andyouevenhadtwoMelatoninlastnight.MaybeyoushouldgetAmbienagain. ”Sheturnedoutbig,butIstillthinkshe’sbeautiful.”Theonlyconstantischange.That’snotcomfortingatall.DidIchangethelaundryover?No?Fuck!ShouldIreallybeeatingallthissugarrightnow?”She’sbig.” ”Please,pleasedon’tleaveme.”

I turned on my video game, desperate for a distraction. While it loaded, I scooped heaping spoonfuls of cereal into my mouth, oat milk running down my chin. I wiped it with the back of my hand before it could fall onto my naked body. That’s right, I was naked. So what?

What if I’ve cursed myself with eternal hunger?! The thought spiked my adrenaline.

For context, let me explain what “hunger” means here. Last week in therapy, I made a real-life connection to a book I had read. My reading teachers would be proud. By the way, this book was so good, I still think about certain scenes, certain lines. Don’t you just love stories like that? In this story, the main character’s father had been cursed by a witch (but don’t worry, he kinda deserved it). She cursed him with hunger -- she cursed him with chronic, inescapable dissatisfaction. He’d eat and eat and eat and never feel full. He would never feel the sleepy haze settle over his body and drag him to sleep, he’d never feel the joy at unbuttoning his pants to let his overstuffed stomach expand--confineless. He would never feel the satisfaction of eating a delicious meal and savoring it with those he loved.

You see where this is going?

I spoke this thought into being last week. “What if I’m cursed like him?” I’d asked. “What if no matter what I do, no matter how much adventure and self-care and intentional living, I’m cursed to be unhappy forever?”

Since voicing this thought, hunger has haunted me. Nothing sounds good, nothing sounds like it will fill this void inside me.

And so we have the terrifying thought that I cursed myself to eternal hunger by asking my brilliant what-ifs last week.

I may need to explain to you why that thought terrifies me. You see, cursing someone, in the sense of casting a malicious spell, implies that someone with ill-will toward me wished me this eternity of suffering. And if I cursed myself, then I would be that person, the one rooting for an eternity of suffering. For me. But if I did this to myself, then in theory I could stop it, right?

The only constant is change. I say that to myself sometimes when I’m feeling low. Because I have to have faith that this won’t last forever. But sometimes, I don’t know what’s scarier -- the thought that I am in control of my life and my happiness and just don’t want to be satisfied, or the thought that I have absolutely no control over much of anything and everything could come crashing down in a heartbeat.

Talk about a rock and a hard place.

Also, that whole time I was mulling that over? I was munching on my cereal. I’m an excellent multitasker when one of the tasks is letting your thoughts off the leash. Run free, little guys.

I finished my cereal and took a few sips of coffee, praying the coffee would make me feel full. Some days when I woke up starving, I’d chug a glass of iced coffee and then not need to eat for a few more hours. Today wasn’t one of those days, but I was feeling too tired to get up and get more food. Instead, I just sat with the pain. The cramped feeling right below my ribs. The rumbling behind my bellybutton.

You wanna hear something funny about hunger? Hunger is a cue from your body that it needs something. My stomach is stomping around, demanding something, but I’m not sure what to give it. I can’t make a decision like that. It’s too much. So I let it have its little temper tantrum. I drink some water, hoping that that will do something.

I learned that trick from my mother.

I’d always hear her say, “Drink a full glass of water before dinner, sweetie. It’ll help you not eat so much, okay?”

Did you gasp? Are you outraged at a mother telling her child to ignore her bodily cues, to doubt that her body knows what’s best for her? You may also be outraged that I was taken to Weight Watchers when I have 10. I was forced to join a gym when I was 12 and I needed special doctor’s permission for it. I also needed special permission to join a cardio kickboxing class when I was 13 since it was for adults just getting off work. They just needed to get in a bit of cardio before continuing to lead their lives of success, yet here was a pimply 13-year old klutz fucking it up.

I wasn’t even that fat, on the grand scale of things. I hit five foot five (165cm for all you non-Americans) in 4th grade and have been the same height ever since. Around age 13, I was about 215-220 pounds, and wore a size 16. See, like not that bad, right?

I say “not that bad,” and then catch myself. That’s not my voice saying that. I am trying to slash through the weeds of Fatphobia with the Scythe of Self-Love, but sometimes that battlefield is dark.

I’m in a place now where I accept my body. I do think it’s beautiful. And the ways I want it to change have nothing to do with being thinner. I want to be more flexible, stronger, to not feel like I’m inhabiting the fragile frame of an octogenarian.

“She turned out big, but I still think she’s beautiful,” is something that my mother said to my husband last week. To be fair, my mother now has pretty advanced dementia, and she mostly rambles off nonsense. I doubt she even remembers my husband informing her that she couldn’t talk about people, especially her doting daughter, like that.

All I hear is: “I tried really hard to make her not be fat, but I failed. Despite her size, she’s still beautiful. You know, for a fattie.”

My stomach rumbles, and I eye the half-eaten bowl of breakfast pasta (it’s leftover from last night, and it’s not as satisfying). The red stretch marks on my stomach glare at me, and a blaze of self-hatred rushes to my cheeks. Maybe if I wasn’t so hungry…

A few hours and one more bowl of flakes later…

Do I use ellipses like a boomer? What if I just like that they build suspense?

Anyway, I think I had a breakthrough in therapy. I have existential OCD, which if you don’t know what it is, you’re lucky. It’s a type of OCD that obsesses over existential questions. What happens when you die? Is there a God? Is this a dream? Do I have free will? Is everyone I know and love a figment of my imagination? You get the idea. And then come the compulsions, which for the longest time, I insisted I didn’t have. But asking for reassurance? Googling things like, is there a Hell? Pinching myself to make sure I’m alive? That’s a compulsion. No different than running home to make sure the stove isn’t on. I don’t trust myself to know. I need someone, something else to tell me what’s true.

What is my purpose? I’ve asked myself this obsessively for a few years now. And at various points, I’ve had various answers. A few years ago, my answer to my therapist was “My purpose is to make people happy.” She pushed back gently, and at the time I didn’t understand why. That felt like a perfectly acceptable answer to me. (Go on, ask me. Ask me if I’m a people pleaser. You already know the answer).

But I’ve known for a long time that my purpose is not to be a caregiver. I literally realized only this year that I was parentified hard as a child. And that left its mark. I’d already been a parent. I’d argue that I still am a parent to my mother. So a few cuts and ties later, I was a sterile 22-year-old woman. (Thank you to the r/childfree subreddit).

As my mom continues to decline, as more and more of her is eaten away, her brain rots like spores of mold on bread. (The image isn’t helped by the frequency with which I find moldy bread somewhere in her kitchen). I really do have to take care of her, though. As a kid, she made me responsible for her emotional well-being. That was the purpose ascribed to me. Be her best friend, be the person she can brag about, be her whole world, be her maid, be her therapist, be her mother.

Why was I brought into this world? My parents divorced when I was 5 -- I wasn’t here for their happiness. My dad even admitted once that he really doesn’t like kids. No, I was here for her happiness. I was going to fill the void inside her, I was going to make her feel understood, make her feel a sense of belonging, purpose, worth, and unconditional love.

And so what happens when I failed and continue to fail at those tasks? Because those sure are a lot of expectations to put on a person. To put on a child. When I fail, I feel completely worthless.

She had me so she could have a perfect person to fix all her problems. When I can’t do that, I feel worthless because I’m supposed to be her perfect daughter. I’m supposed to provide a community’s worth of love to someone who was unknowingly abusive. It’s a tall order.

12/31/23

You ever have a thought in the middle of the night that you think is incredibly brilliant? So you write it down somewhere only to look at it in the sober light of morning and realize it’s utter crap? I wonder if that light somehow missed Stephanie Meyers, since after all it is lore that she thought of the story for Twilight in a dream. We all know this girl just had a vampire wet dream, and to that I say, join the club. Water’s fine.

But yeah, that was me last night around 4:45am when my little furball Owen hacked up a hairball.

My thought?

What if mad became an acronym: MAD. I’m a MAD woman. Because I’m not really a mad woman. I think I’ve burnt through my reserve of fury coals, my logs of frustration. Now I’m running on fumes. More often than not, I’m a sad woman.

But I am mad in the sense of crazy. Not right in the head. A little bit coo-coo. Which is why I thought of this acronym:

Mothers

(with)

Alzheimer's

(and)

Dementia

The little words don’t count, okay?

So, what do we think? Cringe, right? But last night, it seemed so funny. I’m a crazy woman in part because of my mother with Alzheimer's and dementia. In part because of how she raised me, and in part because I have my own issues that are triggered basically every time I interact with her.

I think that anyone would have been pretty rattled if they’d gone through my interactions with my mom. I think that, and yet I can’t stop myself from feeling like I should have been more patient. I should have been nicer. But I was just so frustrated.

The scent of human excrement was overpowering when I walked in her door. I could tell it was coming from the kitchen garbage. I frowned, also scenting a dirty litter box. The cat’s dry food was overfilling from his automated food bowl, and I knelt down to scoop up the gritty kibble.

“Can I help you take out the trash?” I hedged.

“The trash… oh, the trash? Take it out?”

“Yeah, it smells a little bad in here, I think if we take the trash out it will smell better.”

“Well, yeah, I was going to do it, I’ll do it later, don’t worry about it.”

I tried not to roll my eyes. The stench was horrendous, I couldn’t understand how she didn’t smell it.

“I think we should do it now, okay? Can you put a new bag in?” I gathered the bag, tying it extra tight before bringing it to the door.

“So we take this down… down the hall, right?”

“Nope, the trash chute is right around the corner.”

“Trash chute… what’s a trass jute?”

“No, TraSH CHute. It’s where you throw away the trash.”

“Ohh…”

We repeated the same conversation once more before finally sending the trash down the chute. There was a second box, full of her take out containers from the dining hall.

“Wait is this trash? Or?”

“It’s in a trash bag, it’s probably trash,” I said flatly.

“Probably trash…” she mumbled. “Oh yeah, this stuff. Yeah, this is trash. It was something awful.”

She asked if we were going to have dinner together, and I said no. It was 2pm, and I was planning on leaving by 3:30.

“What? So we can’t have food together?” She sounded like I’d told her her cat died.

“Not today, no, but soon, okay?”

“Alright…”

I took a deep breath and listened as she complained about her hair. It was light brown, the roots almost completely gray. She insisted on continuing to dye her hair even though she couldn’t do it by herself last time. “It’s so awful, I want it shorter, I think. Can you take me with you to get a new… a new, you know.” She pointed at her roots.

“A new color?”

“Yeah, didn’t you suggest something? I thought it was a good idea.”

“Yes, I suggested you stop dying your hair and just embrace going gray.”

She dismissed it with a wave of her hand and a frown.

“No, no, that wasn’t it.”

She continued to ramble about her hair, and it made me mad. It made me so mad that she was so obsessed with how she looked. Why did it matter?

I offered to trim her hair, voice tight.

I guided her to the bathroom, and she looked in the mirror. Her face crumbled, and she sobbed out, “Oh god, I’m so ugly.” Her chest heaved as deep sobs shook her fragile frame. It felt like something broke inside me. Like my heart was caught between two magnets, being squeezed by a force I couldn’t control.

“No, Mom, no, you’re beautiful.” The words made her cry harder, and she looked around -- I could tell she was worried her neighbors would hear her crying. Always concerned about the opinions of others.

To be fair, she isn’t beautiful anymore. Her bones jut out on her collarbone, and if you touch her back, you can feel her spine protruding. Her hair was greasy and flat like it hadn’t been washed in a week. She seems to be wasting away, her skin sagging off of her since she’s constantly dehydrated.

She looks like she’s dying, and death is ugly. Death is the most hideous thing I can imagine. It’s the opposite of life, it’s the absence of life. And life is beautiful. Or at least, it can be. I do try to hold on to the few pieces of optimism I can. One is that life is/can be beautiful.

At my wedding, my mom read the quote, "The world is full of beauty when your heart is full of love." And I certainly agree.

But I realized that the beauty I'd seen in my mom before all of this decay came from my love for her. She was so generous, so giving, she had a big heart and was very sensitive. She had a laugh like mine that was both easily recognizable and often heard. But my mom has no love in her heart for herself, so she sees no beauty.

As a teenager and young(er) adult, I had no love for myself. I had internalized all the comments about my snacking, snide remarks about my outfits, and hatred of fatness. The way she spoke to me was just an extension of how she spoke to herself. My foundational relationship to myself had not been built on respect or love. It had been built on disappointment, guilt, shame, and hatred. Sometimes I feel like it’s the reason I found myself in so many situations where the hair on my arms was raised, where I could sense the malintent, the manipulative ambition. I still catch myself thinking like that.

We all inherit our parent’s shit to some extent. Whether it’s literally an inherited mental illness, or just some sort of thing that sets us off, every human alive has beef with their parents about something. It’s a people-pleaser’s worst nightmare, to be a parent. No matter what you do, you’ll fuck up somehow. It’s a guarantee.

Yesterday, I had to deal with my mom’s shit. Literally and metaphorically. I am going to have to continue to deal with her shit, both literally and metaphorically for a while. Eventually, I won’t literally have to deal with it, but that means that she’s dead. The real her died a long time ago, I think. Maybe even before I was born. She had a whole life before I was in it, and sometimes I feel guilty for being the opportunity cost of freedom. Maybe she would have been happier if she’d waited, met someone else, adopted on her own, or just didn’t have kids. We’ll never know, but my brain loves those questions. Those questions are bones for my brain to sharpen its teeth with.

So, this New Year’s Eve, I’ll be toasting to one day feeling at peace with the shit I have to deal with, and hopefully one day, it’ll just be my own.

#ocd #existential crisis #existential ocd #mental health #alzheimers #dementia #therapy #memoir

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