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#i understand that this is kind of a pipe dream but i don't care. i love us.

hairmetal666 · 1 year

Text

cw// cancer mentioned, no character death

Eddie's moving to Chicago with his boyfriend and their best friend.

Eddie's moving to Chicago and it feels like everything is finally coming together.

Eddie's moving to Chicago, Steve Harrington is his boyfriend, and his life is starting.

Eddie's moving to Chicago, but then Wayne gets sick.

He tells Steve that he can't leave, not yet, needs to take care of his uncle.

And Steve, his Steve, perfect Steve, says with no hesitation, "I'll stay. Eddie, I'll stay with you. We'll go in six months. Together, that's the plan."

But Eddie can't let Steve do that; Steve who is everything bright and good and right in the world. Steve needs to get out, even if Eddie can't.

He insists Steve go, insists so hard that Steve can only agree, though Eddie can tell it's killing him.

Before they leave, Steve and Eddie cling to each other.

"Six months, baby. Just six months and then I'll be with you."

"I'll stay, Eds. Let me stay for you?"

"Not in a million years. What's six months in a lifetime together?"

"You mean that?" Steve whispers, the words tickling against Eddie's neck.

"Of course, sweetheart. Never meant anything more in my life."

They cling harder, crying against each other, despite it being goodbye for now and not forever.

They haven't said "I love you" yet, and the words hang on his tongue as the embrace ends, but he can't say it now; not when six months of time and 200-plus miles will separate them.

Except Wayne isn't better in six months. He's not worse, but the cancer's still there, he's still sick. And Eddie can't leave.

Eddie figured something like this would happen. Knew in the back of his mind that Steve and Robin and Chicago were never anything but a pipe dream.

When he calls Steve, he thinks he's ready.

"Okay, so Hopper's letting us borrow his truck, but he needs to know our timeline. You think next Saturday--"

"Steve." He says. His stomach clenches.

"What's wrong?" Because Steve knows, like he always does.

"Wayne's not better."

Steve is silent for a beat. "Okay...that's okay. I'll come back. Right now. Tonight. We'll do this tog--"

"You know I can't let you do that."

"Eddie--"

"No, Steve, don't. Okay? Let's just. It's time, you know?"

"It's not. Eddie, it isn't. Don't do this. Please, please," Steve cries.

"It's for the best. I know you can't see it now, but it is. You need to live your life, Stevie. Get that degree. Be someone."

"Eddie," Steve sobs. "Please. You have to know that I lo--"

"Don't," Eddie snarls. Doesn't mean to but can't hear those words, the three that will break him in two. "This is for the best, Steve. A clean break, yeah?"

"No." And Eddie hears Steve shuffling on the other end, like he's getting up. "I'm not letting you do this. I'm coming back, and we're doing this together. A lifetime, remember?"

Eddie's crying now, can't help it. "Please, don't. Steve, just--it's over, okay? I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I can't do this anymore."

He hangs up the phone before Steve can argue, cries himself to sleep.

5 Years Later

Eddie never gets over Steve Harrington. His golden boy, the brave, perfect, kind, bratty man who has his whole heart.

Wayne is okay. Will never not have cancer, but he's doing good. And Eddie runs a record store in the town over. Visits some bars in Indy when he feels a certain kind of lonely. He's settled, finally, is the thing. He's settled and happy enough, so of course, that's when it happens.

He's at the grocery store, stopped in produce. There's a little girl, maybe 3 or 4--bright pink shirt, chestnut hair, little overalls--sitting in a cart by the tomatoes.

The sight of her sparks something in Eddie's chest, but he doesn't understand what or why, and then she's pointing at him, smiling and wiggling. "Daddy!" She shrieks.

That's when Steve Harrington swoops around the corner, reaching for the girl, his daughter, and Eddie takes a step away, ready to run from this.

The girls says, "That's the boy in all your pictures." She giggles and points at Eddie more. Steve blushes, and Eddie's assaulted by so many things all at once he thinks he may pass out.

"Stevie," he hears himself saying.

Steve freezes, looks at Eddie, so much knowing in those hazel eyes it makes him a little sick. But it still surprises him when Steve pulls him into a hug. Being in those arms again, It's like everything keeping him together falls apart. He sinks into the hold, breathes in deep, feels like home.

It shouldn't, though. Steve's got a kid. Probably a wife. Can't have his ex-boyfriend falling apart in his arms in the grocery store. Eddie disengages, steps back a little. Steve blinks, eyelashes fluttering, and Eddie is still so in love with him it hurts.

"I should--I should go," he mumbles, gripping at the back of his neck like it's a lifeline. The little girl giggles more, bouncing in her seat, and he's overcome with fondness. Can't help but give her an exaggerated bow as he goes.

He makes himself walk to the end of the aisle, but once he's left Steve behind, he runs.

That night, when a knock comes at his door, nothing prepares him for a sheepish Steve Harrington standing on the other side.

"Sorry to drop by unannounced," Steve says, manners still impeccable. "Wayne gave me your address. I'm glad--I'm glad he's doing okay, Eddie."

Eddie's too astonished to respond, nods for a few seconds before, "Th-thanks. Uhh, you wanna come in?"

Steve does and then they're in Eddie's little living room together and what the fuck is he supposed to do?

"Where's the kid?" he asks. He gestures Steve to the couch.

Steve smiles, a soft thing that's a knife to Eddie's heart. "Oh, I left her with Robin. They'll be fine for a few hours. Her name's Ellie, by the way. Ellie Jane Harrington."

"She knows who I am?" Eddie asks.

"Course. I told her about everyone. Showed her pictures. I hoped she could meet you one day."

"Yeah?" Eddie can't stand the thing that unfurls in his chest, blooming with love, so much care it aches in his teeth. "I swear next time I won't run away."

Steve laughs, hazel eyes fond in a way that Eddie can't look at for too long. "You didn't run away, Eds. It was a weird--reunion."

Eddie chuckles, pulls hair over his face. "A little bit. Not every day you run into your ex and his daughter scoping out tomatoes."

"I was hoping to give you a call, ask you out to dinner, or something. Not my kid recognizing you at Bradley's Big Buy."

"You wanna take me out to dinner, Stevie?" He asks before he can think better of it. Steve blushes red, and god Eddie missed him.

"Thought it might be nice, yeah. Get to know each other again."

It's Eddie turn to blush. "Why are you here?" He asks, good of a segue as any.

"Here, like, in your apartment, or here in Hawkins?"

"Both."

"I'm--uh--the new counselor at Hawkins High. Might coach the basketball team."

"But--Chicago," is all Eddie can say.

Steve laughs. "It was fun for a while, but--I don't know, man, it got hard with a kid. Joyce told me about the job opening and I decided to try."

"And Ellie's mom?" Eddie doesn't want to ask, can't stand not knowing.

Steve's eyes fall. "Ah," his hands squeeze into fists. "She's not in the picture. Never really was. After--" he takes a deep breath. "After we broke up, I sort of. Lost myself for awhile. Slept around. One night, I got this call saying that a baby had been surrendered at a fire station, my name listed as the father."

"Oh, sweetheart. I bet you didn't hesitate."

Steve stares at his hands, smiles. "Not for a second. I cried when I saw her, Eds. Just fucking sobbed. She was so beautiful. Then I had to figure out how to raise a kid and finish school."

"But you did it." Eddie can't hide that he's crying anymore.

Steve nods, is crying too.

"I'm really proud of you, sweetheart," Eddie whispers.

They look at each other, tear stained and sad but somehow so happy, and Steve leans forward, presses his mouth to Eddie's. He freezes, shocked to stillness, overwhelmed with the thing he never thought he'd have again.

Steve pulls back, face red and eyes wide. "I'm so sorry. I got it in my head--" he stands, fumbling for his keys. "I should have never--you told me we were done and I know you meant it. But I saw you in the grocery store and I thought, you know, I'm never getting over him. I'm so stup--"

"Steve, wait" Eddie snaps out of it all at once, hurrying to where the man he's never stopped loving is shoving his feet inexpertly into his shoes.

"Don't leave," he says, almost whispering. "Please don't leave. Steve, I'm so, so sorry for how I ended things. I was so young and stupid, and--I didn't want you to lose your dreams for me."

Steve turns then, tears trickling down his cheeks. "You were my dream, Eds. You still are. I should have come back, made you let me stay. But I thought--maybe your feelings had changed. That you didn't--that you weren't--"

Eddie can't help it, pulls Steve into his arms. "I was. I am. You're all I've ever wanted." He presses his face to Steve's hair, breathes in deep. "I loved you then. I love you now. I've loved you every day in between."

"I love you," Steve sobs. "I love you so much."

They kiss, lips slotting together like they never stopped. It's salty with tears, but it's perfect. It's them.

Their mouths part, but they stay in each other's orbit; need the proximity after years apart.

"I have a kid now, Eddie," Steve says into the silence between them.

"Yeah," Eddie nods. "She's beautiful. Looks like her dad."

Steve smiles, flushes again. "She needs stability in her life, you know? She's my priority. Always will be. And if I--if this--"

Eddie knows. Understands his boy just as well now as he did back then. "We'll take it as slow as you need, baby. I want to be there for both of you. When you're ready. And until then, I'll be wherever you need me."

More tears escape Steve's eyes, but Eddie brushes them away. "We have a lifetime to figure it out."

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arcplaysgames · 1 year

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Kawakami continues to be my stealth fave. When Operation Maidwatch started, I fully planned to skip it entirely because lets be real, the set-up was horrendous. Then I figured that'd be less funny so I decided to try it For The Bit.

So fucking glad I did.

Kawakami is in the hospital after collapsing from overwork. And what do you know but the people blackmailing her show up to say howdy and while she is still in bed ask her when her next payment will be.

fuck stealing their hearts, i'm gonna steal their car and drive it into a river

I.... think the implication with "sister company" is transferring from the maid gig to full sex work? Which: I'm pro-SW 'til the day I die but this ain't the way, Kawakami, the way is getting these fuckers off your chequebook.

btw for the side-quests, I love when Reverie is just like "Gimme a full name. Thanks. The Phantom Thieves will handle it." LISTEN. I DON'T CARE. If Ryuji can walk around singing his self-made Phantom Thieves theme song, then Reverie can be an intimidating weirdo to random people.

BOY THE PENULTIMATE LOVERS LINK SURE IS JUST REVERIE THIRD-WHEELING HUH

this was so fucking funny, Ann and Shiho are having a serious heart to heart and Reverie is just here as extra muscle to help Shiho with the stairs.

I'm very glad to finally see Shiho again though I assume it will be for the last time.

WHEN I TELL Y'ALL

I FUCKING SAT ON THIS DECISION FOR LIKE FIVE MINUTES

because I do like Ann a lot! probably more than any of my options so far except maybe Tae, but I don't like her that way, but maybe I would like her that way if I gave her a chance? UGH it's agony but I went with the Just Friends route.

EVEN THOUGH "YOU HAVE ME" IS SOMETHING A FRIEND WOULD SAY SO I LITERALLY HAD TO LOOK UP THE LOVERS CHEATSHEET TO VERIFY WHAT IT MEANT.

Ann, you are still best girl, though admittedly you finally have competition.

I did wrap up Ann's Confidant.

As far as the Lovers go, hers is the weakest to me personally. I would rank them Yukari > Rise > Ann. But I think this is because I don't.... understand Ann's life goals. Which may be just my blind spot personally. Ann's dream of becoming a supermodel to inspire people falls kind of flat because I think modeling is an important job and career but I don't.... connect it to like.... inspiration and stuff?

It's so odd it feels like I'm missing something.

But Ann herself, I adore. I would rank her as honestly one of the kindest people in a Persona game, genuinely good-hearted and just seeking a way to harness that.

New Persona for Ann! Hecate!

Yusuke visited like every other day in summer vacation, so I got some premium hangout time and managed to max his Confidant out too.

AND LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHING

YUSUKE SHOULDA BEEN THE FORTUNE. He makes zero fucking sense as the Emperor. There is nothing about him or his arc that lends itself to the Emperor, but BOY HOWDY does his arc spin 'round and 'round like a perfect wheel.

After some more artist's block, Yusuke finally puts together a piece for the exhibition run by that one jerk who wanted to package and sell Yusuke like a brand. He takes first place!

TURNS OUT THAT THE WHOLE BRANDING THING WAS A FUCKING RUSE. The guy truly was invested in Yusuke's success as an artist and came up with the whole branding thing to get Yusuke angry and get his head in the game.

THE WHEEL FUCKING SPINS AND SPINS.

I'm so fucking annoyed that he's the Emperor, I just don't see it, it makes no sense. Better options were WAITING.

nah only when the game lets me flirt with you even though we're not allowed to kiss. I adore you, Yusuke.

New Persona Get and WAIT NO GO BACK ugh why is it Susano-o AGAIN? And this Susano-o doesn't look NEARLY as cool as Yosuke's. 8C I will miss Goemon and his cool pipe. 8C

wait is this just disneyland. /googles. lmao the Maihama station is right next to Disneyland. ahahahaaha

I will be boycotting this destination for the entire game! 8)

what else did I do outside the MSQ.......

OH YEAH I'm allowed to hang with Sojiro again finally!

TURNS OUT THE GUY HASSLING SOJIRO IS FUTABA'S FUCKING UNCLE

he wants money or he'll file for custody for Futaba (where he'll have an upper hand as he's a blood relative and Sojiro is not)

Futaba actually shows up to bully Sojiro for some food and immediately freaks out at seeing her uncle.

When Wakaba died, Futaba got handed around between her relatives for a while and ended up with severely neglected by her uncle. Then Sojiro stepped in and adopted her.

Like with Kawakami's blackmailers, I want to wreck some havoc on this bastardman.

Sojiro truly is Best Dad, I'm with y'all on this at last. Sojiro, please adopt Reverie. That should be the no-romance end for Reverie, he just gets adopted by the Sakuras.

I FINALLY got my courage high enough to talk to Iwai the fake(?) arms dealer? AND NOW I THINK I'M DOING CRIMES? i mean uh more crimes. additional crimes. like smuggling weapons?

also like. The Solid Snake/Iroquois Pliskin vibes off this guy, he looks and feels like he just got back from the Big Shell and is laying low until Philanthropy is ready to take out another metal gear.

However unluckily for him, he's also my literal favorite card in the Majors, the Hanged Man, the card I am the most particular about, so he's pretty much doomed to disappoint me through no fault of his own. Because I'm the only person who actually Understands the Hanged Man, you see. Just me.

Okay that sums everyone up, back to the MSQ.

#p5 #persona liveblog

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itsnothingofinterest · 1 year

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What you said about your ideal ending for bnha, that the villains would win and change everything, then the hero kids would come back in, straightening things out but being able to make the necessary societal adaptations, sounds brilliantly perfect! Like a destruction and re-creation type of ending.

I really like that idea, as currently the kids have zero intention or means of changing anything in hero society, and it seems the only way to avoid an a**pull ending of 'and the next generation fixed things (no descriptions given and everything is suspiciously the same, but it all worked out!)

I do think that the villains will be saved and the hero kids will win in the end but seriously Thanks for never giving up in thinking we should get a better conclusion on the plots/themes/characters in bnha rather than something generic and unsatisfying.

(In response to this)

Thanks, and you’re very welcome.

Really, I say that ending was “my pipe dream climax for a while” but really its always something I’ve kept in the back of my head. Because someone at some point needs to address the societal faults of HeroAca’s setting, right? And if the villains really are destined to lose and can’t achieve any of their ambitions (not to mention arguments that the League are so self-destructive they shouldn’t achieve their ambitions), then logically it should be the kids.

But the kids’ arcs aren’t headed in the direction and have never been about that in the first place. Their arcs have always been about becoming heroes and saving people, and about what kind of hero they’ll become and how they’ll save people. That’s what all the hurdles they’ve ever faced, past and present, have informed. Even Shoji, the one hero who does want to fix something wrong in society, wants to do so by being an All Might wannabee, which his own origin story showed not working. And while this could all be rectified by listening to and working with the League; as is, changing society just doesn’t seem to be their role. And if it isn’t, then maybe their role is just protecting innocents in the transition and saving the villains when their job is done.

Which would mean the villains' job, their role, is changing society. That is the conventional understanding, right? The villains challenge the status quo while heroes protect and pursue justice.

Of course, there is still the argument that they’re too self-destructive for any of their goals to be something to aspire for; but hey, maybe their character growth is meant to be about learning to be less self-destructive villains. I’d argue that’s what Spinner’s been going through a lot of, at least; juries out on if Dabi & Toga will be headed that specific direction. And maybe they could learn to be less anarchistic and destructive to those around them too, after that. Might be good if they’re supposed to rule for a period, and then come to an understanding with the heroes in the end.

And if we got to see what a “villain society” under Shigaraki & PLF rule is like at that time, get to see the villains put their money where their mouths are and what’s right or wrong with their aspirations & ideals, well I think that would be pretty cool.

Certainly preferable to the a**pull ending of us being told everything got solved easy.

Honestly I think if they went with that ending, where we’re just told Class 1A fixed everything easily off-screen despite all the hurdles in the way of that (not least of which being their own disinterest); I wouldn’t believe it. I’d think they did enough to convince themselves they solved prejudice and government corruption; but they wouldn’t really, and a new League made of villains saying all the same things as the current League would form early into their professional careers to their great confusion.

Hence why I don't much care for the idea of that ending. Complex problems require and deserve hard, detailed solutions.

#ask & reply #bnha #shigaraki tomura #spinner #dabi #toga himiko #league of villains #lov #paranormal liberation front #PLF #hero society #class 1a #I'm not sure how on the table any of this still is; so this might just be rambling of what could have been #but to hold out hope:#my stupid long term predictions

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ravenkinnie · 1 year

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Hard agree that Jinx and Ekko's characters work best when they are on opposite sides instead of Jinx joining him and becoming a genuine part of the 'good' side. Like its not even just because that seems like a pipe dream due to their history. People are also really reluctant to accept or cant grasp that Jinx....has very low empathy.

like some fans heard the 'I just want to help!' quote and reads it as Jinx having the inner desire to help people, which isn't wrong, just incomplete understanding. Powder wants to help to prove herself someone worthy to save towards Vi, not out of a good, chivalrous heart. That especially does not apply to the person Jinx is now. Her area of care and empathy just extends to close family anyway, and most of them are dead.

She'll probably understand or even commend Ekko's motives to bring healing and hope to Zaun, knowing how good-of-heart he is, but outside of that appreciation, the ideal and what the firelights stand for would mean nothing to her.

YES YES YES like jinx probably internalized some of vanders, vis, or silcos ideals ofc but she is not primarily driven by ideals at all, she is driven by her emotions, her relationships to people, her own internal world and I love that about her as a character. you're exactly right, jinx has low empathy, she cannot imagine other people's emotional or mental states and she just doesn't do it. I think she would believe in zaun and liberation of it based on obv, her own oppression as a zaunite and silcos influence but her and silco are a complete opposite to ekko in their approach to this, I just don't think this could be reconciled

but even ignoring jinx, pushing her and ekko together in the narrative of the show just doesn't seem like the best choice for his character? in ekkos perspective jinx and silco have been draining zaun for years together, I don't know if he could just overlook the amount of damage they caused but also I don't think he should, it's okay to leave characters who have strong emotional bonds snd history at odds with each other, that can be good writing too. based on the reddit AMA the lil savior moment he had with her was only months after silco took her in, there's been years since then now and they are just completely different people

also this is a pivot but djjdjdjdj what you say about jinxs empathy extending to close family I wanted to say that vi is a bit like this? not in the empathy sense because vi is genuinely an empathetic kind person but her protectiveness over her family (mostly jinx bc well. ekko is doing fine JDHHDHDJ) puts this tunnel vision on her where that becomes such a heavy drive. like I've seen people drag her over her reaction to that kid dying in the shimmer factory but I love it sm because a) she does react she just doesn't have as strong of a reaction as jayce and I love that contrast between them because yk. a kid dying for a cause in zaun is probably a more common sight than it is in piltover. b) that is such a fantastic flaw to give your 'good' character, the way even kind people can have their failings. I think it adds dimension to her character and vi honestly sometimes doesn't get the credit she deserves in fanon for being a dimensional character with her own shortcomings and value

#asks #jinx #arcane #vi

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harrowharkwife · 1 year

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"redeeming the Buckley parents" dude im sorry but like. speaking as someone with emotionally neglectful parents? if you missed the incredibly unsubtle implication that buck is still viewing his interaction with his parents as part of the "other life" (all the flowers in the kitchen at his loft, his dad wanting to watch the game on the couch, his mom decorating the place as she sees fit, his parents staying longer... it looked exactly like his coma dream!) then like... idk what to tell you? this plotline is written from such aggressively personal and specific lived experience that not to sound like a gatekeeping exclusionary cunt or anything, but i genuinely believe it's just one of those things where either you get it or you don't.

of course buck was going to let himself bask in his parents' attention for a spell. tolerate it, let himself enjoy the bits and pieces of it that aren't half bad, while still seeing it for what it is- a fantasy. i called THAT unpleasant little twist halfway through the episode, and was pissed about it for all of five seconds before going "yeah, god. that tracks."

i was half expecting him to cut his parents off this episode, going into tonight, is the thing? because this is TV, and that's how TV writing usually works. but after taking literally just a second to think about it? of course this was how it went. this was how it was always going to go, there was no other option. that is exactly what it is like to have that kind of parents. you always think that you're past it, that you don't want their attention, that you're above it, you've learned your lesson not to let them in, but your parents are always going to be your blind spot. you never stop getting your hopes up and your feelings hurt, no matter how careful you think you're being with your heart. and this is 911, the show that has made its entire modus operandi brutally, excruciatingly lifelike *emotional* realism, at any cost.

narratively speaking? buck was never going to give up on his birth family entirely until he'd accepted the 118 wholeheartedly as his true family of choice, the family that matters. we all know buck- he couldn't survive a single minute in a world where he feels truly alone, i'm talking no family at all, not even a fever-dream play-pretend make-believe pipe-dream one. he was always going to have to embrace his found family before he could begin cutting off his birth family. he needs their support in order to do so- and he's always had the 118's support, but he's never truly let himself trust in it, or believe in it, or feel it, or feel that he deserves it, until now.

another post on here said it better, but- the new couch and the area rug and the game watched on TV, and most of all, the staying?

that's just the grown-up version of new bikes and chocolate cereal and bandaids on his skinned knees.

buck knows that.

the buckley parents haven't changed at all.

the show is not trying to trick you into believing that they have. i promise.

the entire point of this episode was that it was a look inside buck's headspace. the episode flat out stated, verbatim, that what we were witnessing was just different facets of buck's conscience playing tug of war with each other. bobby straight up said, out loud, with his human mouth, that everyone in the coma dream only knows what buck knows, feels how he feels, realizes what he realizes.

like. i'm sorry, i get it, i am unfortunately coming from a perspective of firsthand experience with a large majority of the rather niche set of lived experiences that this episode and this family dynamic are centered around. not everyone is! that's not a dig, just a fact. not everyone grew up with this exact, precise, hyperspecific kind of parents.

(meanwhile, the first time margaret buckley ever walked across the screen all the way back in buck begins, my wife leaned over and whispered in absolute horror "oh my god, it's your mother," and like, she was right. anyway!)

i fully understand that it is a fucking baffling and beyond frustrating and incredibly nonsensical dynamic when viewed from the outside looking in. but please, please believe me when i tell you that for the story they are trying to tell, and the dynamic they are trying to represent? this episode fired on every single emotional cylinder.

no, the buckley parents are not being redeemed.

yes, buck is letting himself linger under their spell for just a little while longer. letting them fawn over him, playing nice until they leave, daydreaming about what could have been, in another life, while knowing that it's just not meant to be in this one.

yes, he knows what he's doing- this is evan "bizarre and extremely effective forms of self-inflicted emotional injury" buckley we're talking about, here. the man hurts his own feelings like it's a sport and he's trying to take home the gold medal.

yes, this is fucking frustrating. no, it's not the healthiest option he could have chosen.

it's also the single most relatable and poignant and true to life thing this show has ever done, from where i'm standing.

however: no, i have a feeling it won't last for very long. this episode was relentless in positioning bobby as buck's true father figure- the dad to philip buckley's donor, if you will. we're just not quite there yet.

idk, this is getting long, just...if you watched the scene at the end of the coma dream- buck telling his parents that he will always love them, (like? no. respect? hell no. but there is always going to be a tiny, broken piece of you that can't help loving your emotionally neglectful parents, regardless of whether or not they deserve it), but that he knows he doesn't belong there anymore, that there's a real family out there who need him, and that no matter how much they apologize, or what they do to try and make it up to him, it won't change anything, he still needs to leave them behind- and genuinely walked away thinking it was a buckley parents redemption arc?

i truly do not know what to tell you.

that was buck cutting off his parents. not externally, verbally, theatrically, to their faces, sure. but that's the part that TV always, always gets wrong. it doesn't matter what you tell an emotionally neglectful narcissist, they'll find a way to spin it to their advantage and strip it of all meaning. it's what they do best.

what matters here, what matters in real life, and what has always mattered most on this show, is the internal dialogue. the things we admit to ourselves. so as satisfying as it can be to watch cathartic, dramatic scenes where a character tells their shitty parents in no uncertain terms to fuck off and stay gone- in my experience, at least, it never feels as good as you want it to? in fact, it often just makes you feel worse? because it introduces a whole new can of worms to fight over.

the strongest, best, and most important thing buck could have done for himself right now at this juncture of time to protect his peace and guard his heart and move forward with his life, was to simply privately come to terms with the knowledge that his birth parents have never, and will never, be there for him in the way he needs them to. and make his peace with that, secure in the knowledge that he has a family, the family he chose.

going no-contact is great in the movies. it's even great in real life sometimes! don't get me wrong, for some kinds of toxic family dynamics? it's deeply, deeply necessary, and life saving, and the key to healing. and it's always an option, if that's what you want to do.

but toxic, dysfunctional, and/or abusive families are not all created equal. they are not a monolith.

so, like, speaking from experience?

sometimes closing the door on your birth family looks exactly like this: accepting that although you still love them, no matter how much you wish you didn't. being honest with yourself that you don't belong.

turning around, and striking out to find the kind of family you deserve.

lucky for buck, he's already found his.

#sorry this is long as fuck but this episode. woof. i am.... christ. was truly not expecting it to hit so hard.#911 #long post

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squidyyy23 · 2 years

Note

Hi squidy!🥰

I got some Head canon questions I’d love to hear what you think!

Do you you think Ian and mickey have regular date nights?

Does Ian ever teach mickey to swim?

When they buy their own house, is it on the West or south side?

Who cooks better ? Who cooks more often?

Have a great day ✨

-anon xx

hey there anon! been loving the head canon ramblings your sweet self has been sparking! (even if i did sit on this far too long)

so alright, here are my additions (that are subject to change with my whims)

date nights: yes! BUT…it’s already been established these two don’t have a big social circle (and that’s okay!). so they do most everything together anyways. but, ian still insists on date nights. especially as the year go on. fuck, the first time a couple their age gets divorces, ian's going to be allll about the date nights. which mickey doesn’t understand because their date nights aren’t all that different than any normal night. but he goes along with it because it makes his husband happy (and always gets his railed after).

swimming: i think i’m gonna go with no on this one. because it just never really comes up slash neither of them really care? the apartment has a pool, yeah, but mickey can touch the bottom in most of it. he’s a grown adult. i’m sure he’ll manage to learn how to doggy paddle his way to an edge in those last few feet he can’t reach. and ian’s not going to embarrass him by making a big deal out of it. maybe a quick, subtle pointer here or there. but he’s not hosting weekly swimming lessons.

where’s the house: ya know, i kind of want to say they aren’t the home owning type. yeah, yeah, yeah, american dream and all that. but houses are work. i think if/when they become more well off, they’d want the ease of letting leaky pipes or a busted furnace be someone else’s problem. they had to deal with enough of that shit taking care of their family homes as kids. now let them be lazy and call a landlord and make them fix it. and i don’t see them being the type to want to “make a house their own”. the cosmetic stuff isn’t a big deal to them. give them something practical and they’ll be happy enough.

but as to the local, i think it depends on where the rest of the gallaghers end up. if we believe canon, south side was changing anyways. i don't think it's going to feel like the place they grew up for much longer. so where live will probably be a practical decision. close to the nieces and nephews. easy commutes for work. i think the time spent in the westside will make them (mickey) realize it's really not that big of a deal where they live (so long as they're together. cue awws)

cooking: well, i’m quite partial to ian the baker agenda. 😉 but i do think ian is more likely to be the one in the kitchen. mickey’s never been one for healthy eating habits. he’d probably be more than happy to live off frozen food forever. but ian will embrace their new home as the time to pick up new skills. and of course, mickey’s going to pick things up along the way as his husband forces him to help. BUT BUT BUT as they start to age, the first sign of any sort of health problem with ian and mickey is going to be ALL about the healthy food. shoving every superfood google spits at him down his husband’s throat. which ian will gladly accept because it’s cute to watch his husband worry.

#wow. that got out of hand.#maybe this is why i don't head canon too hard.#it's a slippery slope. 😂#a fun one at least though!

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space-coyote-remix · 5 months

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The story of a very, very unhinged dream I had a while ago:

Golden Kamuy fans will understand (maybe.)

Basically, it all started with me going to bed at night like normal and then some time later, I woke up in a cramped, dilapidated looking apartment building on a hard, uncomfortable cheap-ass looking floor with shitty carpet like the kind you'd find in an old office building or something and then all of a sudden it started raining outside, like a huge fucking flood of a downpour, and then the floor started getting wet since the building started flooding like crazy, we're talking like an entire motherfucking river just floating on through like the Venice Canal. I was confused as hell and then I heard something like the click of someone loading a gun and then I looked up and bam, Ogata was there staring at me like I was toxic waste or something (as he does.)

He looked super pissed and I asked what was wrong and he said if I don't get my ass up and get out of the building I'm gonna wind up like Kiroranke, so naturally, I asked him "what happened to Kiroranke?" Ogata just looked over at him without so much as a word and I saw Kiroranke floating through some water while lying on a log while smoking a pipe (as he does) and drinking some tea without a care in the world, looking as content as could be.

I was too confused to react at first so Ogata said he was gonna slap me if I didn't hurry up and I said "but you're holding a gun." And then he said "I didn't say it would be with my hand." And then he slapped me with his dick (I never even saw him whip it out either.)

Somehow, after that, I wound up floating on the log with Kiroranke. He made me some tea and then asked if I wanted a pipe to smoke too but I said no because I didn't want lung cancer and he was like "fair enough." We wound up floating all the way to some fancy looking gated community in some fancy rich neighborhood and then I don't remember what happened after that.

#judal speaks #the coyote talks #this dream was too cracked not to share with you all lmfao #golden kamuy

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the-firebird69 · 5 months

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The empire does not intend on our son getting any money until they're in control and they're trying to extort from him and us and the rest of the world and they're trying to choke the world off to do the same thing everybody is getting pissed off at them and they were seeing as the ones doing it at the post office ultimately too and they're getting the s*** kicked out of them and Intel is pouring out

Thor Freya

Olympus

I'm going to tell you we don't have to pay you and that's what we're saying

Macs

So what you're not the ones who are in charge of paying me and you took money and inventions and I'm suing the old fashioned way too moron

Zues Hera

We suddenly see something you sound like a giant and we don't know what we're dealing with and we don't know what these Giants are.

Macs

You don't know a lot of stuff and you keep oppressing and moving on me one person. You are a pitiful group and the whole world is going to get back to you in a few moments and you don't understand that either in this life you don't get rewarded for not knowing stuff or not getting it or being ignorant who messed around with people forever and have their money you get beat up. You're not going to get rewarded for not knowing what Giants are or what they can do or where they are. And you're not going to get rewarded for messing with me ever and people have been seen to die and a constant basis including Max by doing this simple childish stuff you're doing it's disgustingly stupid you have made me realize I'm in a prison and other people too and that you are the guards and Warden it certainly does not mean that you're smart

Zues Hera

You suddenly see what you're saying they're going to go after us and they're going to after us with an organized strike they don't care about Jesus Christ it's a pipe story and a pipe dream of ours the blame someone were after so we go get the goods and it's kind of juvenile when you say it that way but that's what it is. And suddenly turn around say I need to stop doing that we do see what you're saying you had money you're going to get more money and have a life and we're rooting to Jasmine in exchange for a battle and war with everybody that we are trying to avoid and how can we call that smart how can we call our decision. When we don't know it's out there. Anyone know what these Giants are. Well we can't we'll proceeding anyways to sit here and bother you like a bunch of baby ninnies couldn't have asked for any better I have to suffer because that's the way it is in life and why would I want to do anything else. And you can't do anything else and if we use Jasmine and his life is fine he would not be getting the attention to his he is and we're the ones doing it and it's an ugly ugly stupid thing we're doing and his father and mother are forces to be reckoned with obviated by the fact that they're taking over the planet and we think it's a joke. Because we don't see their full might and we're expecting them to tell us like where to drive-in movie theater or some dumb s*** I don't want to put up with this anymore you Max Mcs what's going on is wrong and you spoiled everything

Robert Duvall

I've been saying the same thing you can't expect this boy leader to sit here he's got more testosterone than a bowl and he's got more smarts than anyone I've ever seen and more people following him who are not even his it's ridiculous you're a bunch of jackasses you need to come down off the high horse and stop doing this to him and you don't understand my perspective I have to tell you something his seal is coming up right now it's in a movie and it's one of the boxes that he's had and handled I don't want to know what it is it's so awful usually

Mac Daddy

Olympus we approve this to print and now

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pathetic-dumpling · 3 years

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We've Come To A Crossroad (What Do We Do Now?) - Guard Dog AU

Rumors about what guards the casino begin to spread and grow, and based on the fact that no one has been allowed into the prison for months, Techno has a growing suspicion of who the casino's new guard dog is. Rescuing Dream doesn't go quite as planned.

this au belongs to the wonderful @stabbysideblog why has been hyping me up this entire fic tysm bro i really appreciate it (i also have a small tag list as the bottom, which i don't normally do, but if u got a notif at the bottom that's why :D)

Read on AO3 instead!

Warning: extreme dehumanization, manipulation, conditioning, torture, not quackity+sam friendly, PTSD, abuse/ve relationships, unhealthy dynamics, mental instability, referenced force-feeding, the process of throwing up, everyone is handling their trauma poorly, this could be a whumptober fic if I wanted it to be tbh, Dream has a shock collar

The more Technoblade learns about Las Nevadas, the more worried he gets. Not only is the country… empire… estate- whatever it is- becoming an economic powerhouse (a title that should only belong to him and Ranboo- who worked for their wealth), but some nasty rumors have been spreading about the place. Particularly about the fabled dog that guards the casino.

Now, Techno isn't stupid. He knows Sam works for Las Nevadas, and he also knows that Sam is the sole power running the prison. Not only does that kind of absolute power lead to loopholes for prisoner treatment, but nobody has been allowed in or around the prison since the casino opened. Which is worrying. Judging by the vague and fleeting description of the thing lurking in the dark corners of Las Nevadas, Techno has an idea of just what is happening to Dream.

So, as with all of his growing worries, Techno brings it up with the Syndicate. Everyone has something to say about Las Nevadas. Ranboo is worried about Tubbo's potential involvement with the country as it develops, and Niki states that something about it irks her the wrong way. Something about the same kind of sickeningly sweet words of freedom of expression and self that L'manberg was first built on. Phil agrees with Techno on the contracts and overreach of power starting to look a little too close to a government with nothing to rival it. So they decided to rival it and see precisely what they're dealing with.

"Ranboo, Niki…" Techno sighs. His ears flop down apologetically. "I love you guys, and I'm incredibly proud of all of the progress you've made, but I'm not sure I feel comfortable throwing you guys into a hostile environment like this."

"No, no… we- I… I understand, Techno," Niki says. She grips her hidden dagger tightly, pressing her lips together. Techno seems unconvinced.

"The only reason I'm taking Phil with me is because I know I'll be outnumbered, and I know how to work with him, alright? I don't wanna worry about you guys if something goes wrong. Me 'n Phil can and have found our way out of plenty of dire situations. I trust you with my life; I just don't trust your lives with me."

Niki sighs and smiles again, this time a little less tight. "You know I trust your judgment, Techno."

"I know, I know." Techno dips his head bashfully, scratching at his cheek. "Also. Uh. It would look a little suspicious if all of us showed up. We can't have them knowing we know something."

"I'm sure they'll get that message just fine from our strongest members showing up on their doorstep," Ranboo pipes up, handing off the invisibility potions he had been tasked with brewing.

"'Strongest' is a subjective word, Ranboo." Techno takes the potion, passing half to Phil, who is checking over his bowstring. "You two are better than us at plenty of things. You ready to go, Phil?"

"Yep!" Phil gives the group a thumbs up, smiling brightly. "Right. We'll see you guys when we get back from checking this shit out. Take care, don't burn down the house. You know the drill. We'll come back with reports, and we'll go from there."

Phil ruffles Ranboo's hair with a light chuckle and gives Niki a tight hug on his way out. His wings wrap around Niki briefly before he pulls back, ruffling them to puff out his feathers. Techno follows after, lightly bumping his forehead against wherever he can reach on the two before he and Phil are ushered out the door. Techno takes out his invitation to Las Nevadas, checking the ominous set of coordinates in the bottom corner. It seems like everyone had been sent some kind of invitation because nothing about it is personalized, but it gives them the country's location, so Techno can't complain about his random spam mail.

Phil breaks off from his side as soon as they arrive at Las Nevadas. He downs his 8-hour invisibility potion, shucking off all of his armor and tucking it away safely.

"Stay safe, Phil," Techno calls.

"You too, mate!" Phil's voice filters through the air around Techno, landing softly on his ears as Phil's form disappears into the distance. Techno, now alone, walks into the main entrance of Las Nevadas, passing the large sign, flashing in the dull sunlight. Techno follows the road into the country, passing countless large, beautiful, but ultimately empty buildings. The casino lights shine off the sleek metal and polished windows, creating various colors splashed and mixed together. Techno huffs, glancing around for any sight of Phil. There's nothing, not even the distant sound of Phil's wings flapping as he works. It's both comforting and terrifying.

On one hand, Phil and Techno won't get caught scouting out the casino. On the other, Techno is alone, something he's come to be very afraid of.

Techno walks into the casino, immediately greeted by flashing lights, bombarding him with bright colors and loud, repetitive sounds. A voice cuts through the barrage of sights and sounds, and soon enough, Quackity is walking up to Techno with a wide grin. Something glints in his eyes that makes Techno's hand grip where the hilt of his sword usually is. Quackity doesn't seem to notice as his smile widens, pulling at the scar running from his lip to his eye.

"Technoblade!" He says, throwing his arms out. He tosses one around Techno's shoulders the best he can, ushering him into the casino.

"Y'know, pal, I never really thought I'd see you out here," Quackity drawls, his hand tightening against Techno's arm ever so slightly before releasing. Techno's tail swished uncomfortably.

"Well, you know how it is," Techno chuckles. "I thought I'd come to see what the fuss is all about."

Quackity chuckles lightly, mirroring Techno. "Quite the fuss there is." His face rests into something a little more neutral, a closed-lip smile still finding its way onto his face as he regards Techno. Something uncomfortable flashes in his eyes, so brief that an untrained eye would miss it entirely. After a short, uncomfortable second, Quackity releases Techno's arm, taking a few steps back and dusting his hands off with showmanship-like grace.

"Well. I'll leave you to wander, Technoblade. Take your time, see everything Las Nevadas has to offer, and, of course," he chuckles, "spend your money wisely. Couldn't have you going into debt, could we?"

"...Yeah. Of course."

Something uncomfortable wells up in Techno's throat, and it doesn't leave until Quackity is far out of sight. He sighs shakily. His hand moves to grip around his communicator, hidden away in one of his many pockets, feeling for any kind of buzz that would indicate a message from Phil. He shorts when nothing happens, cursing himself for going so utterly alone into a place like this. To be fair, he didn't expect… whatever Quackity was.

He can't focus on that now. Techno has suspicions he needed to act on. Information to gather and people to find. He sets off, glancing around at every corner of the casino that might hide something. Every "staff only" entry, every window that seems suspiciously placed, every piston and dispenser he can't immediately find the use for, anything and everything the casino might have up its sleeve. He plays a few games, of course, but those experiences are primarily miserable. The games are too loud, the lights are too bright, and there are too many people, but he can't just waltz in and spend nothing. It makes Techno sad to see his gold taken from him, but he knows it's for a good cause.

Maybe an hour or so into Techno's exploration, a bit of movement catches his eye. He only saw it briefly, a small flash of the sparkling purple of enchantments, but it was something new. Techno quietly moved over to where he saw the flash of purple, glancing around the corner and stepping carefully. His hoofs scuff against the marble flooring, and Techno's breath catches in his throat.

There stands Dream, in a set of enchanted Netherrite armor that clearly isn't his own. It doesn't fit him at all, body completely dwarfed by the sharp edges. Techno cringes at the bruises he knows that will inevitably form. Techno steps forward, slowly, coming to a stop right in front of Dream. He doesn't acknowledge Techno.

"Dream?" Techno asks softly.

There's no response. Dream's face looks like there's nothing behind it. Like every human part of him was stripped away, and he was left in this dark corner of the casino. Ugly, purple bruises stain under Dream's eyes, and the more Techno states, the more he realizes that the armor Dream wears doesn't fit him because he's nothing more than a skeleton pulled together by a thin layer of skin. Bruises and scars litter every inch on Dream that's visible. His breathing is shallow, almost wet, and it stutters and struggles to leave his chest.

The part that makes Techno want to throw up the most is the collar around Dream's neck. Red, puffy scars bleed together with bruises, and Techno realizes with absolute horror that it's a shock collar. A dog tag fits neatly between too-sharp of collar bones. It doesn't have his name. It doesn't even have his fucking name on it. Just Property of Las Nevadas. Techno reaches out a shaky hand, almost scared that Dream will snap under even the most gentle of holds.

"What happened here, Dream?" He asks. Almost shamefully, Techno's hand stops just above Dream's arm. He's too scared to touch him. "What happened to you?"

There's nothing. There's nothing behind Dream's eyes. No light, no fear, just bone-deep exhaustion and a wild kind of desperation. Techno feels like he's going to vomit.

He pulls out his communicator. Damn being quiet about this and keeping the thing hidden. He calls Phil, eyes anxiously flitting between Dream and the small device as it rings.

"Oh, thank god. Phil?" Techno asks.

"Yes, mate?" Phil's voice crackles through the speakers. "Oh shit. You sound stressed. What happened?"

"Are you done?"

"Wh- uh… Yeah. Yeah, I'm done. Everything's mapped out, just like you wanted. Did you find something?"

Techno swallows. "Yeah. We're- we have to go. We need to start planning."

"Shit. Alright. I'll meet you by the sign."

"Yep. Yep." Techno starts walking through the casino. He rips himself away from Dream, but he feels like he left his heart behind to bleed out the longer he walks.

"Techno. Techno, stop." Phil's voice cuts through the growing panic. Techno stops. "You sound like you're panicking, mate. Take a deep breath. Calm down. Leave slowly and calmly, alright? Whatever the fuck you saw- Quackity can't know that you know. Get out, we'll talk, and then you can panic all you want when we get home, alright?"

Home. Home… right. The Syndicate is waiting for a report. For a plan of action. Techno starts walking, this time slowly, methodically, stepping out of the casino. He tries not to throw a worried glance behind him, but the bright flash of enchanted armor makes him seize up. Techno glances back quickly, but it's not Dream. It's Sam, and he's carrying something, but Techno doesn't want to think about it.

It takes everything he has to not run away from the oppressive feeling of the casino. Techno releases a breath he didn't know he was holding as soon as he reaches the sign, something thick and vile dislodging from his throat and finally allowing him to breathe. Phil appears at his side seconds later, clutching an empty bottle, looking half as bad as Techno feels.

"Holy shit," Phil says. "What the fuck did you see in there?"

Techno swallows. He reaches out, grabbing Phil's hand and holding it tightly. "I'll- I'll tell you later. We have to. We have to get home. We've gotta tear that place apart."

Phil's expression hardens, and he squeezes Techno's hand back. "Let's go, then."

They make it back home. Techno's chest aches. Ranboo and Niki want to know what happened, but he brushes past them, climbing up the ladder into his room. His heart, bleeding out on the casino floor, feels like it's finally caught up to him and lodged itself in his throat, filling it with blood. It makes him gasp for air. He takes out the map Phil had created, the key at the top showing everything Phil had found. Every flaw, every place functionality had been sacrificed for style, everywhere they would hide or place traps. He pulls out his own notes next, scrawled on several sheets of small paper he had taken while exploring.

Techno takes a deep breath. He thinks about Dream's gaunt form, the sheer nothingness behind his eyes, and gets to work.

Niki gingerly passes out the steaming cups of tea, sending a worried glance to Phil and Ranboo. Techno had gotten home days ago from Las Nevadas, and he hasn't left his room since. He looked shaken when he arrived home, but Phil seemed to know just as much as the rest of them.

"What do you think he saw in there?" Ranboo quietly pipes up. He holds his cup of tea gently, content to let the warmth sink into the pads on his fingers and palm. Phil shrugs.

"Whatever it was, it must've been fucked. He called me and just asked me if I was done like he was begging me to leave. It's… I haven't heard Techno sound like that in a while."

Niki hums. She sips on her tea. "Well," she says. "He knows that we'll help with whatever he plans. At least, I hope he knows."

"He knows," Phil soothes. "I've seen Techno isolating because he doesn't trust people. This isn't it- he would've moved out of the house by now. He's probably just shaken. He'll come out soon."

"I hope so," Niki sighs. "I'm worried."

Almost as if on cue, Techno slides down the ladder into the main room. He turns around, facing the Syndicate. They haven't left the cabin since Techno arrived home, and they all look at him with hopeful eyes.

"I… I have a plan," Techno says. He tosses a scroll onto the table, which Phil immediately reaches out and takes.

"Mate, you look exhausted. Did you sleep at all?"

"I actually just napped because I knew you'd say something. But. We need to do this. Like, now."

"Mate…" Phil starts hesitantly. He unrolls the scroll, reading over it quickly. "God, yeah, I guess… Okay. Yeah, let's head out."

Techno sighs, and his shoulders sag.

"Ranboo, Niki, can you guys please stay here in case anything goes wrong?"

Ranboo and Niki share a look, shifting uncomfortably, but they nod.

"We'll take care of everything," Niki says. Ranboo hums in agreement.

They gather supplies. Techno fills his ender chest and tucks one away safely on his utility belt, concealing it with the sash around his waist. Niki offers them golden apples, which Techno takes gratefully. Ranboo vwoops quietly, mimicking a comfort noise as he bumps his head against Techno's shoulder. The action makes him laugh, and Ranboo is relieved to see some tension drain from Techno's posture.

Techno takes Phil's hand tightly, and they head out again, and Ranboo and Niki see them off with kind but worried looks. Phil downs another invisibility potion, not letting go of Techno's hand until they're reached the entrance of Las Nevadas. They part with a quick squeeze before Techno feels the telltale breeze of Phil taking off. His wing had healed well, and as much as it pained Techno to keep Phil's flight a secret from the rest of the Syndicate, he couldn't risk anyone else finding out that Phil could fly just yet. He'll tell them later. Techno sighs and follows the road down to the casino.

He enters mostly unnoticed, only checking in with one of the random employees at the entrance. Techno isn't as nearly careful about discreteness as he was last time, walking swiftly through the casino. He retraces his steps back to where he first found Dream, almost stumbling over himself when Dream is nowhere to be found. His ears perk up, listening closely for the clang of armor or even the slight wetness of Dream's breathing.

He wanders around the casino, looking in every crevice he can with his ears perked. He tries to suppress the small noises that bubble up in his throat. He knows making calls would raise suspicion, more than Techno is already raising, and Dream wouldn't know how to respond to them anyway. His tail thrashes behind him. An hour passes, and there's still nothing. Techno's communicator buzzes with a message from Phil, which provides a small comfort. Okay. Two minutes.

In the middle of his frantic searching, Techno catches sight of Dream walking through the halls of the casino. Dream's eyes look sharp, calculating, but he falters ever so slightly when he sees Techno. He even stumbles in his smooth walk, making Techno cringe at how Dream's armor clangs against his body.

"Dream," Techno sighs. This time, he doesn't fear to reach out and grasps Dream's arm gently. He pulls softly, watching Dream's wide eyes as he allows himself to get pulled along. Or maybe he's too weak to resist. They don't have a lot of time, so they need to leave quickly.

"C'mon, Dream," Techno says softly, and Dream follows.

Techno steps back once, and then he pauses at the sudden look in Dream's eyes.

"Technoblade," Quackity says. Techno stops, looking over his shoulder. Quackity's arms are neatly tucked behind his back, but Techno doesn't miss the look he gives Dream. Dream immediately starts trying to pull his arm away, which prompts Techno to hold on tighter.

"What are you doing, Techno?" Quackity asks. His smile looks a fake sort of polite. It pulls at his face wrong with quietly concealed anger bubbling up to the surface.

"Oh, you know how it is," Techno says. He turns around casually, but he doesn't let go of Dream. "Just checking things out."

Quackity hummed. He straightened his spine out, Techno hadn't even noticed Quackity had leaned forward, and he tilted his head slightly. "You know, I really didn't expect to see you back here. You left before I could say goodbye, and, well… this place doesn't really seem like your scene, does it?"

Techno fixes his own posture. "I had business here," is all he offers.

Quackity hums and Dream pulls again. Techno doesn't let go.

"Well, I help but see you've got a grip on my, uh… employee." Quackity looks directly at Dream now. "He's supposed to be making his rounds of the casino right now. Why don't you let him get back to business?"

"Oh. Well." Techno cocks his head. "I can't socialize?"

"He's on duty," Quackity repeats. A small bite crawls into his voice. Dream tugs harder.

"Well." Techno starts walking, tugging Dream along with him. "I'm sort of on duty, too? I guess? Anyway, long story short, I need Dream for a bit."

"Techno, cut the bullshit-"

"Yeah, yeah, that's great." Techno waves his hand dismissively. Thankfully, before he had found Dream, he had made almost a complete loop back to the casino entrance. He could see the door already, which was a small blessing. Quackity follows behind them, nearly stepping on Dream's heels. He pulls out his communicator, probably dialing Sam.

On cue, Sam appears from behind one of the staff-only doors, skimming the situation before moving in. Steam is gently released from his mask in something Techno thinks is an intimidation method, so he mirrors it with a snort. Dream starts pulling harder than before, trying to move away from Techno and to Sam. Both Sam and Quackity were getting uncomfortably close, and Dream was getting more stressed by the second, tugging desperately against Techno's grip. Techno really didn't want to make a whole scene out of this, it would've been more trouble, and it's worth it to just go guns blazing, but the situation is looking pretty tight. He plucks his ender chest off his belt, tossing it to the ground and pulling out his sword. Sam pulls out his trident in response.

Just then, the door opens behind Techno. Phil appears around Techno, his wings, big and black, almost seeming to absorb the light around him. He holds up a button, drawing the attention away from Techno and Sam.

"Everybody stop!" He yells. "I've got a flying machine loaded with TNT right above this place."

Sam and Quackity pause dead in their tracks. They share an uneasy look. At Phil's words, the various players and guests of the casino stop. They see him, standing with Techno and Dream, standing off with Quackity and Sam, and panic fills the room.

"So let us go without any fuss," Phil adds with an easy smile. "With him, and I won't set it off."

"There's no flying machine above the casino," Quackity challenges. "Somebody would've seen you towing up. Bullshit."

"Who says I towered?" Phil's smile grows, and his wings fluff up behind him. Quackity's expression hardens with something akin to envy. Before he can speak, though, Sam whistles like he would with a dog. Techno's stomach drops at how Dream perks up, looking only at Sam.

"Dream, come," Sam says.

Dream tugs against Techno's hold, trying to walk towards Sam.

"Wh- no. Dream-"

"Come on, Techno," Sam drawls, settling into himself easily. "Dream wants to come back and stay with us. Just let him go, and we can act like nothing ever happened."

"Absolutely not," Techno bites out. He tugs Dream back, resisting the puny, woeful sound that escapes his friend. "He is not going back with you."

Sam hums. He stares Dream down, who pauses in his struggling. "Fetch."

Dream stills, and then he's grabbing Techno's sword out of his hand, nearly dropping it due to the weight. He swings, but Phil grabs Dream, pulling him just out of reach.

"Alright, fuck this," Phil says. "Techno!"

"Got it!"

Techno takes Dream and bolts out the door. Phil presses the butter, and the flying machine above the casino whirrs to life, dropping TNT down onto the building. Everyone runs out of the casino as explosions crash through the ceiling, screaming and yelling. Phil and Techno lead the group, running away from the casino and down the long road. Dream still struggles in their grasp, but being pulled along makes him far too unsteady on his feet for him to sort himself and try to hurt either of them, though.

His grip suddenly tightens on Phil, however, and he falls straight to the ground. Phil stops, looking back to see Dream on his knees, wheezing violently as his body convulses.

"Tech- Techno!" He calls. "What the- what the fuck's happening?"

After just a short glance, Techno knows what's going on. A quiet clicking sound fills the air, in time with every time Dream flinches. "It's his collar," he says. Techno leans down on one knee, holding his hands out calmly. Dream growls at him, but it's cut off by a sharp whimper.

"What? Collar?"

"I'll explain when we get home, Phil, but I need you to keep him still."

Phil, while confused, nods, wrapping his arms around Dream's body and restraining his arms. Techno manages to get his hand by Dream's neck, pulling back when Dream bites him but tries again after Phil gets a hold of his head, too. Techno unbuckles the collar, and it immediately detaches from Dream's frail throat.

"What the fuck," Phil breathes. Techno sighs, gently dragging his hand across Dream's throat as soon as his body goes slack. Techno doesn't know what does it- maybe the shock, the pain, or the months of starvation and abuse it must've taken to put Dream in the state, but he's out cold. He picks Dream up carefully, swallowing something down when he notices how Dream clutches to the collar, even in his sleep.

"I couldn't leave him in there, Phil."

Phil sighs, wings sagging behind him with the movement. "Yeah, I know, mate. You would've told me this was an… extraction… rescue mission. I would've headed over a lot faster."

"I didn't want you to object." Techno ducks away when he says this, ears drooping slightly.

"Mate," Phil breathes. "We all saw how shaken you were when we visited this shit-show the first time. Plus, Dream looks…." Phil trails off, looking pointedly at Dream's neck. "I wouldn't object, mate. I trust you. I trust your judgment."

Silence hangs heavy between them.

"Niki and Ranboo do, too," Phil tacks on, bumping Techno with his wing. Techno nods.

There are no Nether portals to Las Nevadas.

When they arrive home, Dream is still asleep and still clinging to his collar. He whines pathetically every time Techno tries to take it away, and despite what it stands for, Techno doesn't have the heart to take anything else from Dream. Niki and Ranboo had taken care of everything from health potions to food, which Techno was thankful for because Dream certainly needed some of that. Niki greets him at the door, almost screaming when she sees what he has in his arms.

"Techno-" she starts.

"I know, I know. It's a long story, I promise. Thank you so much for preparing everything, but I don't know when he'll wake up or how he'll do around people. He's a little aggressive to Phil and me, and I don't want anyone else getting hurt, so I'm going to have to kick you out now."

"Wh… I…"

"I'll explain everything. Just. Like. Give me a day, please."

Niki's eyes land on Dream's frail body, and Techno can see Niki's concern well up in her chest. At least she isn't demanding that Techno throw Dream outside or give him back to Las Nevadas.

"What has he last eaten?" She asks, stepping to the side and allowing Techno to deposit Dream on the couch.

"I don't know. Me 'n Phil are gonna check over him and see how much work we've gotta do. Where's Ranboo?"

"Uh- he went to the Nether for potion ingredients."

"Great. Can you make sure he doesn't come back to the cabin? I don't want him seeing this."

Niki swallows, and she nods.

"Thank you, Niki." Techno bows his head. "Take care of yourself. I'll explain everything soon."

Niki heads out not long after, squeezing past Phil through the door. Phil closes it gingerly, casting a look towards Techno.

"You've got everything taken care of?"

"I hope so."

Phil nods. He pulls up a stool next to the couch, leaning over Dream's form. His face scrunches as he looks Dream over, murmuring to himself softly as he traces the sharp edges of Dream's body. Obviously, he's been starved, but there's plenty of evidence to add physical abuse to the list. They don't know what kind of conditions Dream was held in for these past few months but based on what little they witnessed, there seems to have been some extreme mind games happening, too.

They do what they can. Dream coughs up almost every health potion they try to give him, and trying to get some food in him is looking like a worse and worse idea the longer they try to treat Dream. He seems even skinnier without his armor, every protruding bone and bruise on display without it. Techno takes the collar out of Dream's hands softly. His heart aches at how Dream's fingers twitch around nothing until Phil moves to inspect his hands. Techno can't take it away- not yet- despite the awful feeling that settles in his stomach because of it. So he does the next best thing. He rips out the small metal prongs and files down the edges, breaking the collar open and disrupting all the Redstone packed inside it. At the very least, the collar isn't functional anymore.

Techno loses track of how long he and Phil work, but when they're finally done, Techno drops Dream off in a bedroom they had created for when Syndicate members stayed the night. The bed is nice and comfortable, and it shouldn't press on Dream's unprotected bones too much. He should be comfortable here. Techno hopes that he'll be happy here, too. He doesn't know what he's just disrupted in Dream's fragile mind by taking him out of Las Nevadas. He knows he had to. Dream was withering away in there, and it would've stayed that way, but he can't help the inevitable guilt that'll come when Dream starts trying to figure himself out again.

---

Dream wakes up in a bed, which is weird. Sam told him dogs don't deserve beds. It's soft and comfortable, and there's more than one blanket and two pillows. Dread grows in Dream's throat. He did something wrong; he just knows it. He's disappointed Sam in some way, and this is punishment. It's a trick, a new way to teach him a lesson; Dream just knows it. His armor is gone. Where is it? It's not hanging anywhere.

Dream nearly falls out of the bed, trying to pull himself off it. He knows he shouldn't be in it, and the longer he is, the more upset Sam will be. He needs to show Sam that he knows his place- that he'll be good. He won't sleep in anything he's not supposed to, and he won't say anything he's not supposed to, and-

This isn't Dream's room. Where is his plant? Why does his neck feel empty? With a sudden spike of panic, Dream notices that his collar is gone. Oh god. He finally did it- he pushed Sam off the edge, and this is the last Dream gets before he's kicked to the stress.

Sam is the only person there for him- what will Dream do? How will he get food? How will he know what to do with himself? He can't- why isn't he in his room? Where is he in the casino? He's never seen this room, and he knows the layout of the building like his life depends on it (it does, it does, Sam will be upset if he gets lost, Quackity will be angry-). What room is this? Where is he?

Through his frantic searching, Dream finds his collar hidden amongst the sheets of the bed. A deep breath releases itself from Dream's chest as his fingers trace over the leather. He still had his collar. Something- something must've happened.

Dream glances around the room as he slips his collar back on. It pushes it against his skin, and Dream checks the tightness just to make sure he's done it right. He can barely get his finger between the leather and his neck. Perfect. Just the way Quackity likes it.

The door creaks behind him, and Dream is suddenly glad he's fallen to his knees like this already. He feels drowsy, and through the panic, he feels slow. He definitely wouldn't be able to react promptly like he should. Dream quietly berates himself, keeping his eyes low as a figure steps into the door. It's obscured slightly, but judging by the broad shoulders, it's Sam.

"Dream?" That's not Sam. Dream tenses, sucking in a sharp breath. Techno? What is he doing?

"Dream, c'mon, buddy." Techno drops to his knees, and he shouldn't, he shouldn't because only dogs belong on the floor, and Techno is so much better than that. "Come on, get up."

Techno's hands are carefully placed onto Dream's shoulders, but he's already scrambling to stand. This has to be a trick, right? Where's Quackity? Dream risks a glance around, but he can't see anyone else.

"Whoah, hold on, okay," Techno chuckles nervously. "Pace yourself here, Dream. Are you… you feeling alright? You hungry?"

Dream's stomach tightens at the mention of food. Okay. Okay. He knows what kind of day it is now. Techno is just… He doesn't know why Techno is here or what he's doing. Maybe he's come along to help. Dream feels sour at the idea of being too much for Quackity and Sam to handle. He tries! He really does. He tries to be good. He swallows back the guilt and nods like he's supposed to. Yes. He's hungry,

Techno sighs with something that sounds like relief and pats Dream's shoulders lightly. "We've got some bread for you if you think you can handle it."

...bread? They've never tried bread before. Quackity likes to stick with steak, meats, anything thick that'll make Dream gag. Sam just uses leftover produce. He wasn't going to voice his confusion, though. He hadn't been given permission to speak, so he just nods again, and Techno smiles. Okay. Good. He's never worked with Techno before. He doesn't know the right answers from wrong. Doing what he's trained to seem to work so far, though.

Techno tells Dream to follow him, which he does without a word and without hesitation. His hip clips a table he hadn't fully registered, and Dream stops dead in his tracks, ready for Techno to turn around and yell at him for being so clumsy. Instead, though, Techno asks if he's okay, and lacking a better response, Dream nods. Techno sighs, and his ears droop, which nearly mesmerized Dream. Sam's ears never flicked or perked like Techno's do.

Techno brings Dream to the kitchen. Phil is there, wings drooped against his back and making some tea. His eyes light up when he sees Techno, then Dream, and his expression morphs into a tight smile. Phil is here. Where's Sam? Where is Dream? He glances around, starting to feel incredibly uneasy at the realization that this isn't the casino.

"Hey, mate," Phil says gently, putting down his cup. Dream's attention snaps back to him. He shouldn't have let himself wander like that. "How are you feelin'?"

Dream's attention turns to Techno. Can he speak? Is he allowed to respond? Techno looks busy, though, and doesn't tell Dream anything. Doesn't even look his way. That's okay, though, because Dream usually knows what to do when he receives nothing for instruction. Well. If it's Quackity. Or Sam. He doesn't know what he's allowed here. So, deciding to play it safe like a good dog, Dream doesn't respond. Phil follows Dream's trail of sight with an uneasy look. His wings pull closer to his spine, fluffing up ever so slightly. Dream doesn't react.

Techno pulls out three chairs but doesn't tell Dream to sit, and dogs don't belong at the table, so Dream stands and waits like he's supposed to. Begging for scraps is what bad dogs do, and Dream is a good dog. His eyes follow Techno's hands, though, tensing when he picks up a knife, but it's never turned on Dream. Techno cuts a slice of bread, steam escaping from the warmth of the inside, and turns back to the table. He looks a little surprised to see Dream still standing.

"You can sit," Techno offers. Dream nods and sits down where he stands, making himself comfortable on the floor. Techno looks… unsettled with this action, casting a worried glance at Phil at the table. He doesn't tell Dream to move or get up, however, so Dream sits still. He meets Techno halfway and reaches out to take the bread when it's handed to him. They've never handed the food to him before. To be fair, that was during Dream's exercises, and he was blindfolded for those, so it would've been a mute sentiment. Techno looks at Dream like he's expecting him to eat, and never one to disappoint, Dream takes a bite.

The bread is… good. It's really good. Dream hasn't tasted something so nice in a long time. It's warm and light but sweet on his tongue, but not in an oppressive way, not like Sam's pies or Quacity's meat. Dream takes another bite. He chews. He swallows. Techno smiles and sits down across from Dream.

"Don't eat too much," Techno gently chides after a few more bites, and Dream immediately stops. Techno looks a little confused and tilts his head. "Are you… done?"

Dream nods because that's what he is supposed to do. He's supposed to stop when he's told. Techno looks... displeased. Dream chose the wrong answer.

"Look, I just don't want you to get sick, is all. Do you feel sick?"

Slowly, Dream shakes his head. He was really enjoying the bread.

"If you can take a couple more bites, I'd say go for it. We kinda need to get some food into ya."

Dream nods again and slowly takes another bite. He watches Techno for any indication that this is the wrong choice, that Dream has made a mistake, but it never comes. He finished the slice, finally starting to feel his stomach cramp, and Dream tucked his hands into his lap.

"Alright." Techno sighs. He leans back on his arms, tilting his head slightly. Dream stares at his hands. Where is Quackity and Sam? Dream isn't in the casino anymore, but they should still be close by, right? He glances around, eyes scanning the room he's in. The walls are bright off-white, with Pella-style windows. It's warm with various finances and chests. Cozy. Small. Not the casino. He already knows that, but outside there's… nothing. Snow. There's not supposed to be snow anywhere near the casino. Quackity doesn't like it.

Panic crashes down on Dream like a tidal wave. Where is Sam? Where's Quackity? How did he get here? What's going on? Why did he wake up in a bed with his collar removed? His collar. Dream touches it, feeling dents in the material. Has Techno done something to his collar? Why haven't Sam and Quackity come for him yet?

Dream's breath picks up until he feels like he's dying, barely able to grasp around the air being forced out of his lungs. Dream tries to scramble away but slips on the wooden floor. He shouldn't be here. He needs to leave, needs to get back to his room, he has duties and work to do at the casino, and- Techno reaches out, using one hand to cup his cheek and makes Dream face him. Dream suppresses the whine that bubbles up in his throat when Techno makes eye contact and won't let him break away. Quackity says he sounds pathetic and disgusting when he whines.

"Hey, hey, what's wrong? You have to tell me what's happening."

Permission to speak. Dream swallows, thick and heavy, and nearly chokes on it. "I don't- I don't understand. Wh- where's Sam?" Dream heaves. He has to get back. They'll be upset. They'll be mad at him for leaving home and abandoning his duties. Memories of yesterday crash down on him, only making it harder and harder to breathe. He had failed. Sam gave him instructions, and he couldn't follow through. He didn't do what Sam wanted, and now the casino is nowhere to be found, and-

"Look," Techno says, gripping Dream's shoulder, "you don't answer to Sam anymore, all right? You don't answer to him. You're out. We took you."

Oh.

Dream stutters over a breath. His grip on Techno's wrists loosened, even though he hadn't even noticed he grabbed on. Dream answers to Technoblade. He understands now. Techno took him, and this is his new job. Panic loosens on his throat the longer the thought settles into Dream's mind. Breathing is still tight, but he knows he's okay because he's supposed to be here. Techno did something to his collar because he belonged to Techno. It makes sense now.

Dream nods. Maybe Techno will be a little more lenient on Dream. Techno's first thing for Dream was to eat, which Sam only let him do as a reward for a job well done. This was his welcome home gift probably. A bonus for coming to his new house. "I understand."

Techno's grip falters. "You… do?"

Dream nods again. He takes a shaky breath, trying to relax into Techno's hold like he would with Sam. He's Techno's now. Techno will look out for him, and he'll be good and earn his keep and his food, and he'll do everything expected of him.

"I understand," Dream confirms. Quackity liked it when he confirmed questions. Maybe Techno will too. "I'll do good, I promise. I'll trust you."

Techno's hands suddenly tighten on Dream's shoulder. It's almost painful, and Dream flinches before he can even process it. Dream feels like he's made a mistake.

"Techno…" Phil starts, but Techno is already pushing himself away from Dream and staggering up. Dream lowers his head, moving his hands to rest palm-up in his lap. He's made a mistake, and these are just the consequences. Phil steps over, and Dream flinches, but he knows this is necessary. He's messed up, he's upset Techno, and he'll be punished, and he'll learn. That's how it's always worked.

"Techno." Phil touches Techno's shoulder, catching his attention and drawing it away from Dream. "Dream might think that we're… you know."

The horror on Techno's face is nothing short of heart-breaking. He grips Phil's hand, almost throwing it off of him. He steps back, eyes catching on Dream's crumpled form.

"No. No, I'm not- I'm not going to own a guy, Phil." Dream's head snaps up. "I'm not- he's not mine, he-"

"Techno." Phil steps forward, taking Techno's hand in his own. "We don't know what he was fucking told in that place. He's waiting on you to speak, Techno. I know. I know, okay, but he's…." Phil looks behind him at Dream, who immediately looks away. "Do you think he can… take care of himself right now?"

"Don't talk about him like he's not here," Techno pleads. His eyes move to Dream. "He's here. He's with us, Phil. He's not… I…"

Techno's gaze lingers on Dream for far too long to be comfortable. He can't just command Dream; he can't act like Dream is nothing but a servant, a personal guard, a fucking guard dog, but… he has to know. "Dream," he says softly. Dream's head snaps up in response. He looks to Techno but never makes eye contact. "Up."

Almost robotically, Dream stands. He tucks his arms into his sides and keeps his attention on Techno. Techno breaths out shakily.

"Oh my god, Phil."

"I know, mate. I know."

Dream glances between them, looking almost confused. He dips his head back down, placing his hands behind his back. Maybe they want him to stand differently? He hadn't been told he was on duty, but perhaps they expected different things from him here. He shifts his stance, moving to stand like he was when Techno first found him. That had been a bad day, and his form was sloppy, so maybe this is better. When he looks up for approval, though, Techno just looks sick. It makes Dream's stomach drop. He doesn't know what to do. What is he doing wrong? He hasn't been given any instructions outside of 'stand.' Isn't that what he's doing?

Swallowing his fear, Dream stutters out, "Instructions, please, Sir."

Techno makes a noise Dream can't recognize, and then he's pushing past Dream. He's ashamed of the sound he makes when Techno's shoulder bumps to his and sends him stumbling to the side. He claps a hand over his mouth, trying to cut the sound off to not make the situation worse on himself. The kitchen falls silent between him and Phil.

Phil steps forward, too, but Dream doesn't move. He's done something very, very wrong. He'll be lucky if it's just Phil who handles his punishments. The ones where both Sam and Quackity were involved were always the worst. Then again, he doesn't know Phil. Phil might be more ruthless and cruel than Sam and Quackity combined. Dream tries to suppress the shaking in his limbs, no matter how fruitless the task may be. Then Phil steps past him, towards the door. Dream's head lifts, confused, looking over his shoulder to Phil.

Phil's hand hovers over the doorknob. He looks to Dream, distress written all over his face. What had Dream done that was so bad? "Dream? Hh… stay- stay here, okay?"

Wordlessly, Dream nods. Phil leaves. Dream stays.

Dream's feet hurt, but he stays. He's hungry, and the bread has gone cold. He has to use the bathroom, so he closes his eyes and breathes deeply. He has to be good. He keeps his hands behind his back except for the occasional fidget, touching his collar or picking at his fingers. Dream stays. Maybe if he doesn't move at all, he'll get punished less. It doesn't matter in the end. He's ready to roll over the second Techno gives the command. He knows he's done something wrong- he'll just have to learn! He'll just have to learn.

It starts snowing outside. A breeze flows through the house. Dream stays. He's thirsty. Dream doesn't know how long he's been standing, but it doesn't matter. He is good, and he will be good, and he'll prove to Techno that he's not a useless dog. He can follow instructions, and he can listen, and he can behave.

He'll learn. He'll behave. He'll stay like a good dog should.

From Dream's position in the kitchen, he can't watch the door, but Dream, he's listening. His heart picked up when he heard two sets of footprints approaching the door, one heavy enough to be Techno and the other light enough to be Phil. Then the door opens slowly, and the hushed voices they two were speaking in come to a complete stop. Dream hears a shaky breath but keeps his head down.

"Fuck," Phil breathes.

"What?"

"Fuck, I- I told him to stay." Phil sounds more dejected than anything. Dream can't figure out what he's doing wrong. He bites the inside of his lip until he draws blood. The taste fills his mouth, continuing to spill even as he swallows it down.

Techno steps around Dream's body, eyes lingering on his form. Dream straightens his back a little more if it were even possible. He's good. He's good- he stayed, he did what they told him to. Techno looks sad, and Dream can't understand why. Why isn't he good enough?

"Dream, did you… were you standing like this the whole time?"

Dream nods. Techno averts his gaze, putting a hand over his mouth and swearing quietly.

"Okay…" Techno drags his hands down his face. He looks at Dream briefly, then starts muttering to himself quietly. "Let's get some health pots in you and then get you in a bed, huh? You look exhausted. Let's get you… let's get you taken care of."

...What? But Dream was bad. He doesn't get potions or care or a bed when he's bad. A sound bubbles in Dream's throat, a small question, but Techno doesn't acknowledge it. Instead, Techno reaches a hand out, briefly, before abandoning the idea. Dream keeps his eyes on the ground, trying not to pick at his hands. Sam didn't like it when he picked. Quackity said it was annoying and that he was getting blood everywhere. Techno leaves, but he doesn't tell Dream to follow, so he stays in the kitchen, waiting for Techno to come back. It's a few long, grueling minutes with Phil hovering in the background, but Dream does his best not to move. He's waited this long, so he can wait a few more minutes. He ignores the ache in his limbs.

Techno returns and hands Dream a health potion. It feels heavy in Dream's hands. He swallows back the fear in his throat, memories of being force-fed potions to keep him from dying every day flooding his mind. Dream can't tell if this is a punishment for a reward yet. There's no malice behind Techno's eyes, no anger, but potions always mean punishment in some form. He can hear Quackity's voice in the back of his head telling him to roll over, but he resists. He'll do what Techno tells him to, and for now, all Techno has asked is that he drinks the potion. It's obscenely sweet-smelling, making Dream want to gag. Regardless, he takes a deep breath and swallows the whole thing down because that's what Techno wants from him.

Not even a second later, Dream feels like he's going to throw up. The familiar taste and smell make his stomach lurch, trying to reject the potion, to stop the pain that always follows it. Dream clamps a hand over his mouth, dropping the bottle onto the hardwood floor. It doesn't shatter, but Dream thinks it cracks, rendering it useless. Dream whimpers, trying to swallow around the gagging and heaving that takes over his throat. Techno is saying something, but he can't hear it. He can't breathe. Dream's chest hurts. Tears prick his eyes, and he curls in on himself, making weak, little sounds and trying to swallow everything down.

Dream gasps as he finally swallows everything down. The hand he pulls away from his mouth feels wet, and Dream can't even begin to imagine how pitiful he looks. His face is probably red, tears are streaming from his eyes, and he's still squeezing in on himself, gasping for air like he'd been choked. It must be pathetic. It must be gross. Dream can imagine how Quackity would berate him for this, repeating the words in his head as he tries to get a hold of himself. He's already done enough. He's broken a bottle, he's upset Techno, he hasn't even been following directions correctly! It's his first day, and he's already done so poorly. It's not his fault! He doesn't know Techno- he doesn't know the way he's supposed to behave! He feels so lost.

Dream misses Sam. Sam was always clear about what he wanted from him. Sam gave orders for anything and everything he wanted. Sam made sure Dream was always kept in line. Dream didn't have to guess for Sam. He's gotten so bad at guessing. Hell, even Quackity knew what he wanted from Dream and demanded it without hesitation. Dream fights back the tears in his eyes. Quackity hated it when he cried about little things like this.

A hand is placed on Dream's back, making him flinch. He drops to his knees immediately, ducking his head before he can be forced into position. He hopes he was good. Dream knows he wasn't perfect like he should be, but maybe he was good enough. Techno didn't want him to get sick, and he'd never really been able to stave off something like that before, so he did something new all to please Techno. Maybe Quackity would've been proud, too- he always got frustrated when Dream got sick. Sam might've given him a small pat or sent him back to his room for it. No. He's not- he's Technoblade's. Sam and Quackity aren't here anymore to watch him. Dream doesn't know if Techno thinks what he's done is worthy of a reward. Probably not.

"Dream…" Techno trails off.

Dream nods. He sniffs, gathering himself quickly. He's done this plenty of times with Quackity to know what to expect at this point. He wipes away a stray tear before straightening out his spine. He looks anywhere but Techno's face as he slowly leans his head back, baring his neck. His tag jingles softly as it hits his collarbone.

"Hold on, what- what are you doing, Dream?" Techno asks softly. "You can, uh, you can answer. Verbally."

"The potion bottle, sir," Dream's voice is scratchy like it's clawing its way out of his mouth. He clears his throat, taking a deep breath through his nose. It always feels different with his head tilted back. "I broke it."

Techno sucks in a sudden breath, dropping to Dream's level and gathering him up. He pulls Dream to stand, making Dream open his eyes in confusion.

"There's no need for that," Techno says, making eye contact with Dream. His voice is slightly strained, which makes Dream swallow nervously. "We're not gonna- we're not gonna put a hand on ya, okay?"

Dream blinks. His brows furrow. How will he know when he's done something wrong, then? How will he learn? How will he get better? If there are no punishments, then how- oh. Wait. Techno likes Sam's approach more. He'll just take away Dream's food when he's bad. That makes sense.

"Dream? You copy?"

Dream nods softly, and Techno breaths out a sigh of relief.

"Alright," he drawls. He looks over Dream, shivering from the cold, struggling to stand, looking halfway in his grave. Techno sends a worried glance to Phil, who gestures encouragingly.

“Alright, well, uh… you look tired, Dream. Why don’t. Why don’t we get you back in bed, and you can sleep until you start feeling better?”

After a moment’s hesitation, Dream nods again. With Dream’s permission- or the hollow form of it that Techno can weasel out of him- Techno takes him back to the spare room. Dream hunches over slightly as he walks, and Techno swears if he had a tail, it’d be tucked between his legs. Techno focuses on the collar around Dream’s neck, though. It looks uncomfortable, and Techno can barely stand seeing it against Dream’s bruised skin. If Techno would burn something just by looking at it, he would.

When they arrive back in the spare room, Techno has to essentially pick Dream up and place him on the bed to keep him from lying down on the floor. He doesn’t address the confused look on Dream’s face or the obvious questions Techno can’t stand to answer right now. He brings the blankets up over Dream’s fragile form, tucking him in tightly to ensure he won’t struggle out and so he’ll stay warm.

“You’re sleeping here,” is all Techno says, and Dream seems to understand. Slowly, his hands reach up and loosen his collar slightly, and Techno has to suppress a gag at the way Dream lovingly traces the edges of the object. Techno is probably right in his thoughts that the collar was used to control Dream, used as a punishment, and the scars and the bruising are enough for him to hate it. Dream touches it lovingly, though, and Techno can’t bear to get rid of something Dream holds that fondly.

Dream falls asleep, laying straight on his back. Techno sighs as soon as Dream’s breath evens out into something a little less strained. The tension drains from his shoulders as he breathes, trying to focus on anything besides what Quackity and Sam have done to Dream. His ears perk at the sound of soft knocking against the doorway, turning around to see Phil with a cup of water cupped gingerly in his hands. He slides into the spot at Techno’s side, offering a tight smile as he places the cup on the bedside table.

“This is a mess,” Techno groans.

“It’s a process, mate,” Phil says. He shrugs, wings moving with his shoulders. “I’m happy to have Dream think that I’m… in charge… if it’s too much for you.”

“Nah.” Techno tries to sound nonchalant, but he knows Phil isn’t buying it. The tips of his fingers burn with the need to help and protect and take that stupid collar off of Dream, but he resists.

“I can do this,” he says. “I have to. It’s… it’s for him. It’s to make him better.”

all the people who asked to be tagged or were very excited for this fic and might miss it or something idk:

@karokatten @spookystarfield @imhereformysciencefriends @personalized-radio @purpleglitch @simplepotatofarmer

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maplecornia · 3 years

Text

chapter 33

𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱: 1.86K

𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: You watched them from the sidelines ever since you were a young teenage girl. Now you’re grown up, they’ve returned after 2 long years and everything has changed. What happens when you pull back the mask and find the darkness within? What happens when you see that they’re broken?

"Everyone welcome Lin Yen. She will be your trainee from this day forward."

It's happened.

You're finally a trainee.

Your dream is finally coming true.

So why do you feel uneasy?

Looking up at Jungkook who walks just a few paces ahead of you for the millionth time, you swallow hard.

How did this happen?

"Well I've already said it once, I have too much on my plate to make time for her."

When BangPD said he was taking you to a meeting discussing your training, you didn't expect to find the rest of BTS there. Nor did you expect Yoongi to be glaring at you the entire time.

Avoiding his clear distrust, you tighten your jaw. You thought yesterday he and you had come to a mutual understanding, and at least respected the other...

Glancing his way you try hard not to shiver at the bone-chilling stare he sends your way.

Clearly, it seems nothing has changed.

Jin, noticing the exchange, rolls his eyes and nudges your arm. You turn to where he sits beside you and he gives you an encouraging smile. "Ignore him, Yen. He still hasn't gotten used to you here."

Well, that much is obvious.

But you do appreciate the way Jin is trying to look after you so you return the smile with a small one of your own. Glancing back towards Suga you try not to sigh.

Actually, you don't think he necessarily has a problem with you as a person, there seems to be more that's going on with him. Things that don't include you, but are targeted towards you. Almost as though he were dishing his frustrations out on you.

"If we look at this objectively, Suga, Jhope, and I would probably have the least time out of the rest of you to train her." Namjoon pipes up, his fingers tapping impatiently on the table. No doubt he has things to be doing as well but is too polite to voice his frustration at being kept from his work.

You glance towards him quite sympathetically. When you got here this morning, he was still working at his studio, multiple coffee cups and empty plates of food and snacks scattered around. You wish you could help him in some way, but the best help you probably could do is give him some space.

"Couldn't she pick up producing skills as your assistant?" Jungkook questions and Namjoon almost sighs as he massages his temple.

"It's not that simple..."

"And it's not as important."

At BangPD's interjection, the rest of the room turns towards him.

"Yen is training as a vocalist. She won't need to learn rapping skills, nor focus too much on producing at the moment. The only things she needs to worry about are singing and learning simple dance techniques."

You nod, opening your mouth to try and agree, but Yoongi cuts you off.

"Perfect. Then you won't need me."

As he pushes back his chair, standing to leave, you feel that you should be the one angry. Honestly, did you ask for his help? You've done nothing towards him for him to be treating you this way. Plus it's not okay for someone to just dish their frustration out on you. Even if you are the easiest target.

Don't be involved at all, see if I care.

However, before Yoongi can exit, Namjoon's stern voice holds him back.

"Enough Yoongi. I know you do not agree with this decision, but it has been made. This concerns all of us." Suga turns to him, opening his mouth as though to tell him off, but Namjoon raises his eyebrow.

"Unless you are no longer a part of BTS?"

At the rising tension in the room, you almost shrink into your chair. You almost think Yoongi will destroy RM with the voracious glare he wears on his face, but after a moment of silence, he walks back to his chair and sits down.

An uncomfortable silence ensues, and you can't help but feel as though you were an unwanted third party. How that is possible at a meeting discussing you, is as confusing to you and it is to anyone else.

"I wouldn't mind being her mentor."

Flinching in surprise, you turn to the person who spoke up beside you.

Jungkook.

"Jungkook, are you sure?" Hoseok asks him, and Jungkook turns to him with a smile and sparkling eyes. He seems to be filled to the brim with excitement, as though he could run laps around the building five times without breaking a sweat.

"Of course, I'm not the main vocalist for nothing. Plus, I'm center, so I'm fairly experienced in dancing and other positions." When he glances your way, you blink in surprise, blushing at the fact that he caught you staring.

"Actually, I was kind of hoping I could be her mentor." Confused and slightly touched at his behavior, you try hard to suppress the heat rising to your cheeks. He smiles before looking away from you and towards the rest of the table.

"After all, I'm the one who fought for her to become a trainee, it's only fitting. Isn't it?"

In the end, it was decided that Jhope and Jimin would be your dance mentors, Taehyung, Jin, and Jungkook would help with vocals, and when they could, Suga and Namjoon would teach you as much as they could about production. All of them would advise you on publicity and BangPD will help you closely when it came to details about your training and possible debut.

But Jungkook would be your main mentor.

Glancing his way, you wonder where he's taking you. After the meeting, he requested you follow him, and you thought he just needed to talk to you for a moment. You didn't think he would take you halfway around the building without so much of an explanation. You furrow your brow, pondering the multiple different things that have happened already, and it's only 9 am.

You could go for some caffeine right about now.

"...Yen?"

"Hm?" Dazedly, you nod your head his way, your mind not completely there with him at the moment. Jungkook smiles, almost affectionately.

"You didn't hear anything I just said, did you?"

Balking, you feel it as your cheeks flush in embarrassment and you chuckle nervously, avoiding his gaze.

"Uhm, no. I didn't. I'm sorry." You mutter and at your expression, he can't help as his grin grows wider. He finds within him a sudden urge to squeeze your face, and then immediately chastises the idea.

Boundaries, Jungkook.

"Jungkook?" you ask, breaking into his thoughts and he tries to ignore the way his heart bursts when you say his name.

"Yes?"

"What did you mean back there?"

"About what?"

Hesitating, you wonder if you should complete your question. But, seeing his curious wide eyes, you know you can't take it back now.

"When you said you fought for me to be a trainee."

"Oh, that." Clearing his throat, Jungkook avoids your eyes and he stumbles for the words to your question.

Taehyung told him not to say anything, but that doesn't mean that Jungkook can't tell Yen he was there.

"I'm the one who gave your recording to BangPD."

At the explanation, you look towards him with wide eyes, your heart pounding hard in your chest.

"So does that mean..." he smiles, probably guessing your next words and you find yourself dumbfounded.

He's the reason you're even a trainee.

He was there that day, he heard you sing.

Blushing you slap your hands on your cheeks, trying to hide the red that blossoms at the revelation. He chuckles at the attempt, which only worsens the embarrassment.

"How...?" you wonder, half under your breath.

"I was walking by the studio and heard your voice." When it's clear you still don't understand, he leans down, so that he's eye level with you only needing to whisper for you to hear him. "You had left the door open."

"Oh."

At your meek and small voice, he can't help but laugh as he pulls away to open a studio door and enter. Still trying to piece together the situation, you follow him, but stop when you recognize your surroundings.

"Is this..."

Turning to you from where he stands next to the chair amid the room, he smiles.

"So you figured it out." Stunned, you watch him as he takes in the room as though it were the birthplace of something amazing, something beautiful and sacred.

In a way it is.

It's the place he discovered you.

"This is where I first heard your voice."

You're afraid to move, afraid to speak.

When will there come a time where you believe all of this is real? More than a dream? When you look at Jungkook, his smile, that strange look in his eyes...You feel as though it's okay after all to trust that it's real after all.

That he's real.

"This is the birthplace of your dream."

You can't help but snort, and he looks towards you. You know he's trying to be sentimental, but...

"A little dramatic don't you think?"

He smirks at your comment, before turning back to the room.

"Is it? I find it fitting. Almost as though we've come full circle." As he raises those doe eyes back to you, you can feel your heart skip a beat. "I mean, who would've thought the same girl who spilled coffee all over me would change my life with her voice?"

Though it's a sweet sentence, you can feel the shameful embarrassment rising in the back of your throat as you shove his shoulder. He laughs at your reaction, holding up his hands in surrender.

"I was hoping you wouldn't remember." You nearly pout, turning your face away from him and crossing your arms in indignation in a childish way to punish him for teasing you. He chuckles at the attempt, but soon finds his laughter dying out as he stares at you.

Taking you in as though you were the most precious thing on Earth.

Maybe you are in his eyes.

His eyes soften and his lips part almost indistinctively as he reaches out to take your chin in his own hands. Slowly, he angles it towards him so that your face is mere inches apart from his, close enough that if he wanted to, he could place his lips on yours without even trying that hard.

Eyes wide, you stare into his as he smiles that same strange smile.

Maybe it's not that you don't know what it is, maybe it's that you don't want to try and figure it out. What lies in his eyes is something you'd rather keep hidden.

Right now, that's the only way for you to be okay.

Nevertheless, you don't want to push him away.

His eyes lidding as he brushes a stray piece of hair behind your ear, he whispers in your ear once more. The delicate lure to it, the deadly husk, and almost indistinct heat almost makes you shiver, and you can feel yourself tense as though preparing for something that will never come.

"How could I forget?"

note: oh, so many jungkookie moments sajdlkfsjfk, dw though we will get more of the other members soon! i know i do a lot of the maknae line, but the hyung line is coming soon (more specifically we'll see some more jhope and jin, since we don't really see them now ;-;)

chapter 34 here

check the Infinite Stars masterlist for more chapters

check my BTS masterlist for other BTS content

check out my masterlist for other kpop fanfics

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jisungsmochi · 3 years

Text

somebody to you - hrj

somebody to you - renjun

behold,, the FINAL part of my nct dream x the vamps songs series! leaving y’all with something really wholesome and fluffy bc i’m inlove with renjun

word count: 2.8k

summary: huang renjun didn’t like relationships. he thought they were messy, and honestly, a waste of time. he had his whole life ahead of him, so why would he need a significant other to be happy? that was all until he met you, and thought to himself, maybe it wouldn’t be all bad...

read the rest here!

I used to wanna be

Living like there's only me

But now I spend my time

Thinking 'bout a way to get you off my mind

renjun scrolled through his endless instagram feed, swiping through threads of his friends with their girlfriends. he would be lying if he said it didn’t make him

borderline sick. he was always a realist, never really seeing the point of having a serious relationship at such a young age. in his life so far, he’d probably say he’s only had one girlfriend, and it was a random girl he asked to prom so he wouldn’t feel left out. renjun was never opposed to love, he just wasn’t actively seeking it.

“dude i reckon you’re gonna like her! she’s super cool from the sounds of it, and she goes to our university!” haechan insists as the four boys sat down for dinner in their shared apartment.

“i don’t need you to set me up on a blind date. i’m capable of finding someone on my own, thank you very much” renjun rolled his eyes, fed up with the continuous discussions of his single status.

“yeah, and how’s that going for you?” jaemin chimed in, causing jeno and haechan to chuckle in response. renjun just scoffed, shoving his mouth with more food to avoid speaking further.

“give it a chance. the worst that could happen is that you don’t vibe with her and you never talk to her again” jeno tries his best to convince the stubborn boy. renjun just shrugs, his mind contemplating the idea.

“okay fine, one date. if you guys really think she’s soo good for me, let’s see how accurate you guys are” renjun snickers. he was not confident in their matchmaking skills at all, but he loved seeing them fail.

“perfect, i’ll set it up for you. just sit back, relax and be your boring self” haechan grins, tapping away on his phone. renjun ignores the cheeky boy’s comments, finishing up his dinner. his first date in over two years, this should be good...

I used to be so tough

Never really gave enough

And then you caught my eye

Giving me the feeling of a lightning strike

renjun was regretting this date already. all he knew about you was your first name and your uni course, nothing else. the boys had refused to show him any photos of you, claiming that it would be more ‘romantic’ if he fell for you at first sight...what a cliche, he thought to himself.

“how will i even know it’s her, if i don’t know what she freaking looks like?” renjun groaned, nerves slowly building up as haechan pulled up to the date location.

“i’ll point her out, okay? just trust me” renjun let out a short sigh, hands slightly jittery. why the hell was he nervous? it wasn’t like he was going to see her after this one date.

as renjun stepped out of the car, his eyes scanned the scenery.

“jeez, you guys really went all out for this date” he was amazed by the view. it was a restaurant that was by the water, multiple little boats sailing across it and the sounds of birds humming.

“of course, you only deserve the best” haechan winked, eyes looking for renjun’s date.

“dude what if she doesn’t even show up. does she even know what i look like?” renjun was slightly panicking at this point, drifting from his tough exterior.

“haechan?” a soft voice interrupted his thoughts. renjun’s eyes diverted to the owner of the voice. he felt stunned by the sight of you, dressed neatly in some jeans and a flowery blouse. you had slightly curled your hair, hands clutching to your purse as you greeted the two boys infront of you.

“hey y/n, this is renjun, your date for tonight! see you kids later, don’t get up to anything crazy” haechan chuckled to himself, shoving renjun to meet you. renjun almost clashed into your smaller frame, catching you off guard. you gently held his arms, keeping a small distance between you both.

“o-oh my bad, i-i’m renjun” he stammered, eyes meeting yours. you were slightly blown away by his looks...he was really attractive. well done, haechan.

renjun would say the same about you. even though he didn’t have a particular type, (as he found it kind of dumb tbh) he believed you could fit it perfectly.

“i’m y/n! nice to meet you” you widely smiled, renjun returning your expression as he pulled out his hand for you to shake. maybe this wasn’t going to be so bad after all.

Look at me now, I'm falling

I can't even talk, still stuttering

This ground I'm on, it keeps shaking

you were currently trying to hold back your laughter as renjun recounted the story of how he caught jaemin with his girlfriend...doing the nasty, during their first week of university.

“oh my goodness! were you scarred for life?” you slammed your fist on the table, causing others around you to glare. but renjun couldn’t even focus on them, attention solely on you.

“of course! it was the first week! like couldn’t they have just waited until midterms?�� renjun chuckled at the memory, proud of himself that he made you laugh so much. he must be doing something right.

“you’re really funny, renjun. some of the other guys that haechan tried to set me up with were lowkey boring. i guess he sees me as boring too” you slightly frowned, watching as renjun piped up in his seat,

“y-you’re not boring at all! you’re funny! and pretty too” he muttered the last part, not wanting you to have heard. but you did. you decided not to linger on it much, afraid to make him too flustered.

“you’d be the first guy to say that” you shrugged, taking a small sip from your glass of water.

“have you had boyfriends in the past?” renjun suddenly asked, causing you to raise an eyebrow.

“i-uh i’ve had a few. nothing too serious though, how about you?” you curiously ask in return, watching as renjun looked down to his lap. he hesitated before answering,

“i’ve only had one girlfriend before. i’m not really an avid dater” renjun admits to you, hoping that you didn’t find him lame.

“oh neither am i! we have another thing in common! i feel like relationships can get really difficult to manage, especially if you aren’t in the right headspace, you know?” you started rambling, renjun stringing along to your every word. he found such beauty in the way you articulated your words. he was so entranced he almost forgot to respond.

“i totally understand how you feel, i’ve always thought that i should live my life to the fullest before i consider settling down” he commented, causing you to nod along. you really liked his answers, it seemed like you were both on the same page about relationships. you didn’t expect to enjoy his company this much, initially agreeing to go on the date so that haechan would stop teasing you for not having a boyfriend in uni yet.

you walked alongside renjun, waiting for your roommate to pick you up.

“i had a really good time tonight, renjun. thankyou” you kindly complimented, causing renjun to become more shy (if that was even possible).

“no thankyou! there were times i felt kind of awkward, but you really know how to carry a conversation” he smiled, watching as you started to get shy.

“are you flirting with me, huang renjun?” you teased, nudging his arm gently.

“so what if i am?” he nudged you back,

“well i don’t think i’d want you to stop” you smirked. before renjun could say anything back, your heard the familiar voice of your roommate urging you to get in her car.

“oh that’s my ride. i have to get going. this was nice, i’ll see you around renjun!” you hurriedly embraced the boy, placing a gentle peck to his cheek before rushing to your roommate’s car.

renjun still didn’t say anything back to you, his body frozen from your touch.

‘no no no’ he thought to himself...he was falling for her.

All I wanna be, yeah, all I ever wanna be, yeah, yeah

Is somebody to you

Everybody's tryna be a billionaire

But every time I look at you, I just don't care

“so are you gonna tell us about the date or do we have to call and ask her instead?” haechan teased as the rest of the boys sat in their living room. renjun has a book in his hands, wanting nothing more than peace and quiet after his long night.

“gosh, will you let me finish this chapter?” renjun huffed, causing jaemin and jeno to snicker. haechan pulled out his phone, holding it to renjun’s face,

“oh would you look at that? it would be a shame for my finger to slip and dial y/n” before he could continue, renjun hurriedly tossed his book to the side, tackling the pestering boy onto the ground, holding him down firmly.

“holy shit, did you get stronger?“ haechan could barely speak, still in shock from the sudden attack. renjun slowly leans back, letting out a tired sigh.

“you two are ridiculous, let’s cut to the chase, did you like her or not?” jaemin rolled his eyes, ready to hear all the tea.

renjun looked from side to side, not liking all the attention that was on him.

“i-she was really cool. honestly yeah, i did like her. but i don’t think she’s looking for anything too serious at the moment” renjun shook his head, thinking back to your heated discussion about relationships.

“okay that sounds like a cop out excuse. i think you’re just scared” jeno chimed in, the two other boys nodding along. renjun glared at them, trying his best to maintain his composure.

“yeah, i mean, did anything happen aside from good conversation?” jaemin continued to push, renjun now becoming more reserved. of course he trusted his friends, but they never really openly spoke about their feelings like this, it was quite new to all of them.

“she kissed me on the cheek before she left, does that mean something?” renjun muttered, watching as haechan tips himself over, now laying on the ground.

“you’re an idiot, must we spell it out for you? she’s totally into you as well” jeno groaned in frustration.

truth was, renjun wasn’t sure how to properly ask someone out, nonetheless be in a proper relationship with them. he was in desperate need of help...but all he had were his three idiot friends.

“i know i don’t know her well and all, but after she left, i couldn’t stop thinking about her. is this what it’s like to fall for someone? oh god...i’m falling” renjun started rambling to himself, jaemin and jeno now rested against him, shoulder touching either of his.

“the answer is pretty clear, man. go for a second date! make the move, she might be thinking the exact same thing” jeno shrugged, trying his best to advise his friend, the best he could. renjun bidded, actually agreeing with jeno for once.

suddenly, renjun felt his phone ringing. he immediately picked it up without looking at the caller ID.

as if you were listening in on their conversation, your voice rang through renjun’s ear.

“hello? is this renjun?” you nervously stammered, waiting for a response. renjun was completely frozen, his mouth hung wide as jeno pressed his own ear closer to the phone.

“y-yes this is him” renjun finally spat out, hands slightly shaking.

“oh great, this is probably coming as a surprise to you. but i uh, wanted to know if you’d be interested in going on another date” you were able to finish, heart racing as you held the phone tightly. renjun felt his heart stop after your words, jeno shaking him gently to snap out of his daze.

“o-oh yeah, i’d be really interested” renjun replies, mentally face palming himself for sounding a little too eager.

“amazing, i’ll keep in touch” you smiled to yourself, trying your best to contain your excitement. eventually you hung up, screaming into your pillow, kicking your feet up and down. was this how it felt to actually like someone?

“there’s your chance, don’t blow it!” haechan teased, throwing a cushion over to renjun who was still frozen well after the call had ended.

‘holy shit’ he mumbled.

the date you had planned for renjun, involved attending the local food markets they held once a month. you thought it would be a social enough setting for conversation to not get too awkward, as well as enjoy a variety of food. renjun met you at the bus stop, dressed in baggy jeans and a blue wind runner jacket. his hair was slightly styled, some strands gelled back. it really accentuated his facial features, making you admire him even more than you did before.

“you look really good today, i mean, not like you don’t look good everyday i’m sure you do..” you shook your head at your rambling, wanting nothing more but for him to laugh it off. renjun just smirked at you, planning another witty comment to respond,

“not as good as you though” he gently guided you to walk with him, his hand travelling to the small of your back. you slightly froze at the contact, but aimlessly followed him. he surely had his way with words.

as you both tasted some amazing food, renjun found him standing quite close to you. if you were trying a sample, he would stand behind you, his chest touching your back occasionally. it seemed really natural to him, and you didn’t mind it at all. he would often touch your shoulder gently to grab your attention, or pull you along by your waist. it gave you massive butterflies that you could shake off.

“did you want to start heading home? we can walk to the bus stop together” renjun offered kindly, his arm wrapped around your shoulder as you slowly made your way out of the large crowd. just as you were about to respond, rain started sprinkling from the sky. renjun quickly moved you to stand under some shelter as the rain came pouring.

“how the hell are we meant to walk in this?” you half shouted, clutching onto renjun’s side. he couldn’t bear moving you away from him,

“let’s just run, we can’t wait for it to pass” he suddenly took your hand, pulling you along as he bolted to the nearest bus stop.

“you’re so crazy, renjun!” you shout at the boy, giggling at the entire situation. before you knew it, renjun span you around, pulling you close to his chest.

“the only thing i’m crazy about is you” he confessed, catching you completely off guard. he had a habit of making such flirty comments, but this time you felt he wasn’t trying to joke around.

“w-what?” rain was washing over the both of you, your clothes completely soaked at this point.

“i really like you, y/n. i really freaking do. i didn’t want to admit it at first because i was scared of the idea of dating. but i want to be with you. i want to be somebody to you. everyone is out here trying to settle down and start their lives, but i feel like with you we can go at a steady pace. i don’t want to rush things, incase it gets messy, and difficult. but i just needed you to know that i really like you, and i hope it’s not all in my head that you like me back” renjun firmly confessed to you, eyes never leaving yours. you slowly raised your hand to wipe some rain drops off his face, watching as he smiled into your touch. he held you tightly in his arms, awaiting your response.

“renjun, i think i made it really clear that i like you back. i was also nervous about how you’d react, considering you weren’t really looking for anything serious at first. i think we should give it a shot, we can worry about all the stress and possible fights later on. all i know is that right now, you’re the only person i want to be standing in the rain with. now can you please kiss me?” you couldn’t contain your smile as renjun leaned into you. his lips pressing gently against yours. your fingers now running through his wet hair as he held your waist firmly. the kiss started getting deeper, the atmosphere really playing into the romantic nature of it all. eventually you both pulled away, foreheads presses against eachother, softly giggling.

that was the beginning of your relationship with renjun. despite having ups and downs (as expected) you both persevered and tried your absolute hardest to make things work. renjun finally admitted to himself: falling inlove wasn’t so bad...especially when it was with the right person.

#huang renjun #nct dream imagine #nct dream fluff #nct dream fic #nct renjun imagine #nct renjun fic #nct dream renjun #nct writing #nct fluff #nct fic #nct imagines #renjun imagine #renjun fluff #jisungsmochi masterlist #jisungsmochiimagines

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greenygreenland · 3 years

Text

Sink or Swim: Kai x Reader [kinda angsty]

-tbh i had a tiny crush on Kai growing up

-i still swoon over him when he's cool but like, lloyd has stolen my heart

-you all live in yang's temple still

-as a note, i write for female readers because uhhh yeah plz don't be mad at me ;-; (and either way, you can always change the words around in your head if it bothers you)

Summary: Kai needs help. You're there for him, catching him before he sinks.

Kai's got Lloyd, but who's got Kai?

Ninjago was filled with a variety of perils. Some were easier to see, such as destruction of any population within the premises of Ninjago city. Other times, it was minuscule, like a speck of dust. If you looked hard enough without blinking, you could see it. But most times it was invisible.

The sun was bright today, shining past the swiftly moving clouds as you clashed under its heat. Sparks flew as your katana slammed into Cole's, who skillfully parried your blows. You readied another combo, twisting to the right and faking a slash before spinning and striking to the left.

"Cole look out!" shouted Kai. Cole wasn't fast enough, and you knew it was because he wasn't used to using a katana. His hammer lay on the platform leading inside, right by Jay's side under the sunshine.

You suddenly realised Cole would be split in half if you didn't stop. But how could you when the inertia practically sent you flying towarss him? "Cole--!"

Clang!

Kai parried the attack. He hit your blade with so much force that it was sent flying across the courtyard, thankfully, clattering harmlessly on the ground. You heaved out a harsh sigh and slapped your knees. "That was close. Sorry Cole." He chuckled, giving Kai a good slap on the shoulder.

"For once our Hot-Head wasn't distracted by his 'oh-so-perfect' looks." Cole said. "How did you do that so fast?" Kai sheathed his sword with a shrug. It was odd to see him so quiet, especially around this time in the day. His expression remained relaxed, but it was void of its usual smug smirk. "I don't know, I just improvised."

You can't help the frown settling on your lips. There was an edge to Kai's voice, as if he had just returned from an unseen battle between life and death. He looked normal, yet the way he forced out a small laugh made you cringe.

"I'm going inside, think I might shower." he abruptly announced. "Don't train too hard or you might bake in the sun!" You watched as he fiddled with the strap on his sheath, twiddling it and running it between his fingers. He caught your stare and flashed a fleeting smile your way, yet it didn't feel genuine. "Kai--"

He pretended not to hear you and rushed through the temple doors. Your frown deepened. "He looks upset." Jay rested his cheek in his hand with a snort. "I'll say. He looked like he was thinking hard about something."

"But what?" Cole inquired with a sigh. "Nothing's been happening around Ninjago, shouldn't he be happy about it? He can play video games all he wants now, or, I don't know, talk to Skylor on the phone? Morro's gone and Lloyd's fine now." Zane raised doubtful brow. He took a seat by Jay and leaned his head back against one of the supporting beams. It was an odd sight to see everyone so deeply in thought again, especially since none of you should have been deeply in thought in the first place.

"Lloyd has not fully recovered." Zane notes. "He suffers from mental trauma and is regaining his strength as we speak." Nya hummed in agreement. She set her weapon down with a thoughtful nod and leaned against a supporting beam. "I don't know about you, but he seemed kind of sad. Why don't you talk to him (Y/n)?"

"Yeah, you're his girlfriend so you guys share a special connection." piped up Jay. You cam't deny that. Your relationship with Kai was special, so he told you certain things no one else had ever known about him. Whether it be about his past, or even what he dreams for the future, you knew it all.

Well except this.

You stood up, ignoring the low cracks from your aching body. "I'll be back." You pulled open the temple's doors, gently shutting it behind you as you surveyed the vast room. The main hall was empty, save for Sensei Wu who sat at a table drinking tea. He turned to you, eyeing your troubled expression knowingly. "Kai is in his room." he simply stated. You smiled at him gratefully. "Thank you Sensei."

You sprinted up the stairs, caring not if you skipped the creaky steps or walked right over them. It was quite tranquil in the halls of the quiet temple, yet somehow, it made you uncomfortable. "Kai?" You stopped in front of his door. "Kai--"

Sniffling. That was the first thing that caught your ears. Your fingers paused on the door handle, slipping past the cool metal as you continued to listen to the sounds. You knew what crying sounded like, but this? It was earth-shattering. The way he cried sounded exactly like raw agony. It was painful to listen to, yet you couldn't bring yourself to walk away.

If Kai was suffering, you had to be there for him like all the times he had been there for you, or Lloyd, or Nya and Jay and Zane and Cole.

Your fingers wrapped around the door handle. You gently knocked and peeked inside. He sat on his bed with his back facing you. His katana lay on the floor instead of of by his bed or next to his pillow like he usially did.

"Kai?" Your voice came out as a gentle whisper. "Are you okay?" His crying ceased so quickly that if you hadn't been standing outside listening, you would have thought everythimg were your imagination.

"Yeah." he steadily said. "I'm okay. I just needed to take a break after that spar. It got really intense." He laughed. It wasn't a happy one. If you knew what it felt like to have your organs ripped out, you'd describe it as listening to Kai fake his laugh and fake his happiness. He put on a brave face for the world, and perhaps that was because he knew people relied on him to step up when Lloyd couldn't.

You opened the door a little wider and let yourself in, softly closing it behind. "If something's wrong Kai, you can tell me." He sniffled quietly. "No, I'm fine." He laughed; you didn't miss the quiver in his voice. "I'm just a little tired."

"No, it's something else. I won't judge you, promise."

Kai sniffled and grabbed a tissue from his nightstand. He blew his nose with a shaky breath and tossed the tissue in the bin. For a good minute, he sat there in silence, slowing inhaling and exhaling rattling breaths. You made your way over to him and took a seat at the edge of his bed. He kept his back towards you as he sniffled some more, so you sat there, watching his shoulders quiver.

Slowly, Kai entertwined his hand with yours. He gave it a good squeeze, as if reassuring himself you were still there. You didn't want to say anything to him yet. If you did, you were sure it would break his already fragile tranquility. Thankfully, he made the first move.

"I know you wouldn't leave me," he began, "but sometimes I can't help worrying. What if we go on a mission and none of us make it back? Lloyd almost died, Cole's a ghost.... What if something happens to you? Or--or Nya and Jay or Zane?" He let out a rattling breath that spoke of all the battles you both endured. It was hard to believe you both survived every single one of them.

"Kai, we've lived this long." you said. "Why not longer? And even if one of us does die, life will go on. It always does in Ninjago, and it blooms again into something new." You squeezed his hand. "You're thinking about your parents too."

The quiet Kai stayed in was enough of an answer.

"I understand it hurts. You know, my parents died when I was very little. I don't remember how they looked like, but I remember what I felt. They made me so happy. It was short, but I found it again in you and the others. Even if something disappears, it's never truly lost." You smiled even though Kai would never see it. "Lloyd's still here because you saved him. None of us are going anywhere for as long as we can help it."

Kai's shoulders slumped. A sigh left his lips and he finally turned to face you. What strikes you the most about him isn't the puffiness under his eyes, or the bags and crinkle in his brow--it's the life that's been sucked out of his expression. His eyes were hollow, as if someone had completely wiped the emotion of happiness from existence. The deep frown tugging at his lips is even worse. It's thin, tight, and quivering.

"I-I'm sorry..."

You placed a hand on his cheek. "Kai." It's all you can muster, a name, a look of sorrow, and worry. Howw had you not seen this? How had you missed something so plainly put?

You gently pulled him closer, wrapping your arms around his warm body as the rain fell from his eyes. "You have nothing to be sorry for. If anyone should be sorry, it's me. I should be there for you, but I didn't notice. I love you though and I'm here now." you gently whispered.

"You're not alone Kai. You don't have to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. We're all here for you and no one is leaving." His cries started out soft, but with each word that left your mouth, his whimpers grew, gaining and gaining in volume until a heart-wrenching sob ripped through his throat.

Tears gathered in your eyea and you allowed yourself to cry with him. It hurt to think about losing anyone, it hurt to see your boyfriend so battered, so beaten and defeated. What cure could you offer to remedy his pain you shared?

There was no answer to that. And so you sat there, keeping your arms tight around each other as if either of you would disappear. Right now, it was sink or swim. You had to fight the ache and push forward, even if it felt like you were both drowning.

Please don't forget to reblog so this can reach more people! Thank you all for reading!

#ninjago zane #ninjago jay #ninjago cole #lego ninjago #ninjago #ninjago x reader #legoninjago #ninjago wu #ninjago kai #kai smith #kai x reader #lego ninjago x reader #sorry i can't add read more #i'm on mobile

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tinisprout · 3 years

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No Doubt in Us

Chapter Seven - They'll Be Fine *written chapter below*

Fiance!Haknyeon x Fem!reader

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Synopsis: Life is great, you have your dream job, you finally got your first big break, and you are now engaged to the love of your life. Happier than you’ve ever been, you live life one day at a time. Then one day a terrible accident happens leaving you in a coma. Where you finally awake, everything is not as you remember. Amnesia takes away 3 years of your memory, forgetting your beloved Fiance. Faced with a reality that seems unreal, as your mind is stuck in a past with uncomfortable memories, your future with him is uncertain.

Send me an ask if you want to be put on the taglist for this series

Taglist:@my-summer-night @deputyjuyeon @juhaktheoneforme @sunqnew

Sorry for the late chapter I've been very busy

Word count: 3.6K

Neither of you knew who fell asleep first, let alone at what time you fell asleep. What you did know is that it wasn't enough sleep. Both of your eyes were red and heavy after waking up by your alarm. Maybe setting it to 9:30 was a mistake. You look at Haknyeon who was sitting up trying to keep his eyes open.

"You know I love you, but I blame you for this." He uses his hands to refer to both of you.

"Excuse me, if I remember correctly we both were tweeting, Diamonds aren't forever lyrics." Bickering like this with him seemed to be so far away before yesterday, but after talking with him last night you felt a lot closer, he felt like a friend.

"Ugh fine, equal blame." He smirked, enjoying this little banter. You get up from the floor hitting your face to wake you up a bit more.

"Better." You reach your hand out to him, and he takes it pulling himself up. "Alright, clean up time." You swipe your phone off the ground checking to see if there was anything new. Just in time, your phone buzzed a new message from your mom.

Mom: Hey Honey, I know we said we'd come over noonish, but your father got very excited to make something for you guys. He already bought everything, so forewarning. We'll be there in an hour give or take. See you soon.

You turn to Haknyeon showing him the message. When he looked back up at you, you asked, "Since when did my dad cook?"

"Hmm, maybe a year now?" He says almost unsure of it himself. "But that's a story for later, your dad will love to tell you. We have about an hour to get this place in order before they come." You text her an, “ok”, back.

"Okay, let's get some speed cleaning done." You both work together to fold the big comforter. "I'll bring everything back upstairs." Haknyeon nods at you.

"I'll take care of the kitchen area," he calls out to you. You felt a little bad, you left a lot of dishes there. I'll just work faster so I can do other things. The sounds of clinking dishes and shuffling feet filled the house, both doing various tasks around their home. When they were finally satisfied with their work they both went to sit down on the couch to rest.

As if cursed preventing you from resting, a knock came from the door, making you both stand up again. You check your phone, 10:53 a.m. a little over an hour from the time your mom said. You both scurry to the door. You could hear the familiar voice of your mother conversing with your father, it brought a smile to your face. It felt like it had been such a long time since you last saw them, and maybe that was the case, you weren’t sure. Still, you opened the door eagerly for them.

“Mom,” you say with a big smile on your face. You see that she is carrying bags in her arms and you take them from her, ushering her inside. “Come in.” Following behind her was your father with bags in his hands as well, “Dad.” You set the bags down and your father does the same.

Everyone except Haknyeon was crowding the entranceway. You looked at your parents, they seemed a little bit older than the image you had of them in your memories, and you felt your throat tighten. When they looked at you, they scanned you from head to toe, touching your face, lifting your arms, making sure you were really okay. Their actions make you chuckle, “I’m okay, I promise,” you say trying to reassure them. Their baby girl was really okay.

“You’re okay,” Your mother wraps you in a hug, “It’s okay, you’ll be okay, honey. I promise.” Your words being thrown back at you like that made tears prick your eyes. You brought one of your arms around your mother and your other hand reached out and tugged your father’s shirt urging him to join you two. Creating this group hug the three of you had a tearful reunion, saying I love and I miss yous to each other.

Despite how close he was to your parents he still felt like it wasn’t his place to be there in your moment, so he waited patiently by the side, smiling at the happy little family reunion. Your father pulled away looking and looked in Haknyeon’s direction while wiping away the tears forming at the corners of his eyes. “Come here, son. You’re part of this family too.” Haknyeon was shocked by your father’s words.

Regardless of how close he was to your family, this moment felt like it was too personal to be a part of, especially with how things are now, so he hesitated to come closer. You and your mother pulled away from each other and she looked to Haknyeon as well. “It’s okay, Dear. Don’t act like a stranger.” As she said that, your mother spread her arms out, welcoming him. Your parents looking at him as one of their own, Haknyeon felt overwhelmed with emotions. They looked so sincere to him and he couldn’t deny them, so he came to them as they wished.

“It must have been hard on you too.” The three embraces and Haknyeon felt a different kind of comfort compared to his friends’ comfort. This parental comforting feeling that he didn’t know he was craving. Since the whole incident, he didn’t tell his mom about a single thing, he knew she already had a lot on her plate, he didn’t want to stress her out. Tears pooled in his eyes, your parents could feel his shoulders tremble and their hearts broke.

Crying the stress away felt so much relief and gratitude for your parents. Haknyeon thanks them and everyone takes a moment to clean themselves up, wiping away the tears, this peaceful calm now over the room. You and Haknyeon both take the bags your parents brought and lead them further into the house, dropping the bags off in the kitchen. “So, Haknyeon said I should ask you guys about Dad cooking. Why is that suddenly your thing?” You ask, bringing in a topic that should be a happy conversation.

Your parents hum at the same time thinking. “It’s definitely because of Haknyeon,” your mother says while nodding her head.

“It was when we came over. You are your mother went to go get something, so you left the task of cooking to Haknyeon,” your father chimes after. You look to Haknyeon and he nods confirming your father’s answer.

“I had your dad help out a little here and there. I think he first got interested in the seasoning process.” Haknyeon smiled as he thought back on the old memory. Your father and Haknyeon recounted their first cooking experience together, many laughs filled the house. Then your mother piped up at the end of the story looking at you.

“Needless to say when we got back home, take-out needed to be ordered. Whatever scaps they salvaged was not enough to feed the four of us.”

“I was lucky your mother let me touch a stove again, let alone walk in the kitchen.” Your father passes a playful smile to your mother.

“That’s right, you’re lucky that the scraps you offered were not that bad. Now that I think about it that was Haknyeon’s doing, wasn’t it?” She teases him and your father feigns sadness.

“It hurts me that you would think that way, Dear.” This familiar banter between your parents brought a smile to your face, they were still as in love with each other as you had always seen them. Your eyes subconsciously moved to Haknyeon, a smile still holding on to your face. You didn’t expect to see Haknyeon's eyes already on you, the corner of his lips lifted, your eyes went wide. Haknyeon, as if caught doing something bad looks aways, but realizing how silly he must look, his eyes found their way back to you.

He gave you a bashful smile and you tittered at the display. The moment is broken up by your mother motions you over to her. "Well you boys can have fun cooking together again, I need to catch up with my daughter."

"Have fun, Ladies. We'll call you if we're done here before you." Your father shooed you away from the kitchen and took your spot by Haknyeon. You and your mom decided to go out to the back porch, taking a seat at the small table set up you had.

"So, honey, how have you been lately?" You sigh.

"I have been better, but I'm working on it."

"And what about you and Haknyeon?"

"It was a little difficult at first, but we decided to try and work it out. He seems really nice and he is fun to talk to, but I don't know if I can fall in love again, it's all feels so sudden.”

“That’s understandable. We love Haknyeon, but if you feel he isn’t right for you anymore, don’t be afraid to say so. We’ll be here for you no matter what.”

“I know, I think falling for someone like him would be nice, but life isn’t that easy.” Knowing how your relationship was with Haknyeon, she thought it was almost impossible that you wouldn’t come to love him again, but she kept her mouth shut. That was something you needed to figure out on your own, she didn’t want you to feel like you had to be with him, even if that’s what she hoped for.

“What about your friends how have they been fairing with this?”

“We’re good, I think. They are understanding about everything even the ones I don’t remember. They seem like good people.”

“You always had good taste in friends, if Chanhee is any indication of that.” You release a deep sigh, feeling your soul shrivel up at the thought of Chanhee. Your mother looks at you with confusion, “What happened?”

“We got into a little argument.”

“Some things just never change do they,” She chuckles. Watching the both of you grow up she witnessed some of your fights and had sometimes been the one to help you two patch things up. “You’ll be fine,” she really wasn’t worried, the two of you always found a way to make up.

“Yeah, I’ll work on it.” The conversation veers off from its current direction. The two of you talked about what you could and couldn’t remember. She told you about stories of yourself she could recall, and then some stuff about her and your father. There didn’t seem to be a big change with them and that brought comfort to you, knowing that some things were still the same as you remembered.

Meanwhile, inside the house, the two men were cooking. Your father was instructing Haknyeon on how they were going to make lunch. When the cutting proceeded, your father spoke up first.

“So, have the two of you made any decisions yet?” it was a sudden question but he could only assume he meant about the status of your relationship.

“Well it was a little complicated at first, but she said she wanted to try dating me again, so we kind of started our relationship over again.”

“You think you can make her love you again?”

“I- I’m trying to be hopeful. What she saw in me before, she can see again.”

“Personally, I don’t think you should worry that much. I’m not saying to not try and win her over, that will still take some work, but I can’t see her not falling in love with you again. Do you know how much happiness you brought her? I think you’re already set up for success, just don’t screw up.” With his last words, the knife he was using slammed into the cutting board with a loud thud, cutting through a carrot and the cut-off piece went flying.

“Please be careful,” Haknyeon says as he picks up the carrot piece and throwing it away.

“That was an accident, I was distracted.” He stops trying to cut and looks a Haknyeon. “But on the off chance that things don’t turn out good and she decides that she can’t love you, through no fault of your own, then just know whoever she picks after, I won’t like them as much as you. You’re like the son I never had.” Nothing like a little dark humor to lighten the mood.

“Thank you, Sir.” Haknyeon felt sheepish at his words, even though it wasn’t the first time he’s said something like that. Light-hearted small talk continued as the two continued prepping, besides the one mistake in the beginning the cooking process goes on without a hitch. Soon enough the house filled with a tantalizing smell. When all is done, your father goes outside to call you can your mother back for food.

When you finally come back inside with your mother you are greeted with the sight of Haknyeon contentedly setting the table for everyone with care. Your eyes lingered on him, looking at the half-smile to yourself, His smile is nice. It gives him a friendly endearing look and you didn’t notice you started smiling looking at him till your mother nudged your arm, dragging you back to reality from the daze you were in, giving you a knowing smile as she looks from you to Haknyeon and back. You turn away from her not saying anything feeling flustered at the realization of what you were doing and walk ahead of her. You could hear your mother snicker, this causes Haknyeon to look up at you then your mother and his smile grow.

“What’s so funny?” You felt your face heat up, Why did he have to look now?

“It’s nothing.” You try and hide your embarrassment with a smile and Haknyeon looks at you suspiciously before letting it go and telling you both to have a seat at the dinner table. Taking up the offer you sat and soon the table was set and everyone was seated. To your delight, the food looked, smelled, and tasted good. “My compliments to the chief,” you nod at your father approving of his cooking, and glance at Haknyeon in acknowledgment of his help.

“Careful, Honey. Don’t inflate your father’s ego too much now or he’ll start to think he’s better than me.” It’s true, it wasn’t as good as your mother’s cooking, but he had potential.

“Just you wait, I will be one day.” Your father shoots a stubborn glare at your mother, causing everyone to laugh. The meal warms you up from the inside and you stuff yourself with your first meal of the day. Thinking about that you realized two things: Haknyeon also didn’t eat before this and this is the first time you’ve had a meal with him, so you glance over at him, catching him mid-bite. If your eyes could they would have gone as big as when he opened his mouth to take a bite.

Haknyeon greedily shovels the food in his mouth and when he notices you staring, he stops mid spoon, mouth still agape. You bite on your top lip to stop yourself from laughing at the silly look he had. Sure, it was shocking to see him open his mouth like he was about to unhinge his jaw, but in its own, weird way, it’s cute and charming. Haknyeon just felt like he was embarrassing himself too much today. You mouth an apology and he pouts his lips a little, your small interaction going unnoticed by your parents as they were currently in their own world.

Lunch with your parents continues with light conversation and when everyone had their fill you started to help clean up, but your mother stops you.

“Thank you, but we got it. You and Haknyeon go take a rest for a bit we’ll be done soon.”

“You sure?” Both you and Haknyeon ask.

“Yeah, go, go.” For the second time today, you are shooed away in your own house. You went going to cross swords in helping since you felt your tiredness hit you again after eating. The two of you decided to take a seat on the couch, leaning back into the cushions and leaning your heads back. You felt this amazing comfort perfect for dozing off, you wonder if Haknyeon is feeling the same.

“It’s not just me, right? I feel so warm and sleepy now.”

“Hmm?” Way ahead of you already he was starting to doze off too and you smile.

“Sleepy?”

“Yeah…” You both can’t help but let sleep take over you despite the noise coming from the kitchen. When your parents finish cleaning up they call out to the two bodies on the couch, but neither answers. So your mother goes up to both of you and holds back a gasp. She waves your father over and the sight he is greeted to is you and Haknyeon leaning on each other.

As if unconsciously drawn to each other’s warmth, your head rests on his shoulder and his head was laying on the top of yours. Both pairs of legs lean towards each other.

“I was planning to stay here a little bit longer, but I think we should leave now.” Your mother whispers to your father. He nods and they get prepared to leave. Your mother left a note on the counter and your father decided to take a picture of the two of you, making sure to send it to Haknyeon. They leave both thinking the two of you will be just fine.

***

You stirred in your sleep state bringing yourself closer to the heat you felt beside you, but the movement brought pain to your neck and shoulders waking you up. Opening your eyes you lifted your head and felt a terrible stiffness, you realize your head was laying on Hakyneon’s shoulder. Not just that, but you were also in close proximity to each other, almost like you were cuddling. You look at Haknyeon checking if he was awake but all signs led to a no, eyes closed, as his head was leaned back on the couch in an uncomfortable-looking way, his lips parted slightly, chest rising and falling rhythmically. You admittedly feel a little weird being with him like that but it wasn’t bad, besides the pain you felt currently.

You carefully get off the couch so you don’t wake him up. You grab your phone from your pocket, checking the time, 6:48 pm. Surely your parents weren’t here still. You find the note left on the kitchen counter.

I remember you said you mentioning you were tired, so we decided we should just let you two sleep. Don’t feel bad about falling asleep on us, we had a lot of fun see you guys again. Take care.

Love Mom

You go back to Haknyeon on the couch, looking at the position of his head again. Figuring it would be better to wake him up now or else he would end up having a greater pain in his neck. Drawing closer to him you get a better look at his face, his skin was flawless, it looked even better than Chanhee’s skin. You get even closer for a better look and before you realize what you’re doing your fingers slide across his face cupping his cheek, skin just as soft as it looked. You lightly shake his face calling to him, “Haknyeon... Haknyeon, wake up.”

His eyes flutter open, a dazed look on his face, like at any moment he could go back to dreamland. His eyes focused on the visage in front of him, blurry yet he could still see the ever recognizable beauty that was you. His lips moved in an arc and he brought his hand up to your face cupping your cheek in the same way you did his. That is what brought you out of your trance and you were petrified in an instant. You felt your heart shoot up in your throat when you saw the loving gaze he directed at you while rubbing your cheek with his thumb.

This killing blow in it all is when he called you, “Hey, y/n,” with a deep husky voice that you were wholly unfamiliar with. You felt your face and neck heat up, with the intimacy of the situation. Does he realize what he is doing or is he still half asleep? You shot up from the couch not sure if you wanted to know the answer, stepping away quickly, trying to distance yourself from the state of affairs. Startled Haknyeon sits up snapping out of his daze.

“I- uh, sorry.” Haknyeon looked as confused as you were shocked.

“Did I just- I thought I was…. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.” He truly thought you were just in his dream, it was such a common occurrence that he didn’t think twice.

“No, I started it. it’s my fault.” He recalled the touch of your hand, that kind of contact made it feel almost as if nothing between the both of you changed. Neither of you knew what to say at the moment, so there was a bout of silence. You opened your mouth again after thinking of something to say, asking a question straight from left field, “Can you help me? I need to apologize to Chanhee.”

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u-no-poo · 4 years

Text

Journal of the Bruised || Sirius Black

Pairing: Sirius Black x Fem!Reader

Marauders Era

Word Count: 2.9k

Summary: In which Sirius gets fascinated by the spitfire witch after reading her hopes and goals in a research journal.

Warnings: slight wounds, swearing, anxious thoughts, mentions of toxic parents, suggestive flirting, making out, me abusing my prompts I'm supposed to use for twelve different fanfics... (i think that's it, please tell me if I missed something.)

y/h/c=your hair color

y/l/n=your last name

y/n=your name (or just yeen:))

︵‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・༺❀༻・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ︵‿︵‿︵

You carefully step over some gigantic vines as you stroll around the forbidden forest. With a journal on your hand, wand in your pocket, and the bright moonlight over your head, you crouch down to get a closer look at some thorny branches and see a gleaming strand of unicorn hair entangling within it. You carefully save it in your pocket for your potions ingredients collection.

You stand up to get back to the castle without anyone noticing because getting detention would be a blow. You increase your pace, a hoard of centaurs being the least of your woes, considering the distant howls you've been hearing.

Your fear of getting in trouble at Hogwarts is just a result of your parent's high expectations, but you'll risk it for the sake of adding something to your journal. You love going to the woods at night just to pick a rare plant, animal hair, or at lucky nights, beast eggs. The moon is so bright you don't need to pull your wand out to illuminate the path.

Within a heartbeat, a loud thundering howl followed by ground-quaking steps electrify your spine. Instinct tells you to run immediately but the feel of something else's presence just several meters away glues your feet to the ground. You slowly reach for your wand as you turn. There's nothing there, but it feels like you're being watched.

A small rat came running near your direction as you inhale deeply, backing up towards the shadows just in case. A huge stag suddenly appears from where the rat came from, followed by an enthusiastic bear...no wait, you squint hard and could make up a large dog. The howling returns but this time, it's louder and scarier. Shivers overwhelm you as a full size werewolf came out of the shadows. Your free hand fly towards your mouth to stifle your terrified gasp.

You move away but not carefully enough, swearing all of them looked at your direction. The next second, you're running for your life, not daring to look back. All you know is that not only the werewolf is coming your way, but also the stag and the dog, and you don't care why. Nothing else matters as you make efforts not to scream nor show your face. It becomes harder for you through the thorny vines, wincing as the branches sting you.

Nobody can know you've been breaking the rules, not if it means getting many wounds or getting devoured alive. Nobody can know, or else your parents may force you to quit your hobbies and start preparing for work at the ministry. Oh you'd rather be dead than live without your passion.

The fear and panic about your future drives you out of the forest, not realizing until you find yourself catching breaths and applying pressure on wounds. You sit on the ground, listening to the distant howling that nearly became the last thing you heard. You check your pockets, your wand and the unicorn hair is still there.

"Damnit! Where's my journal?" You whisper-shout, bitter expression from your stinging wounds and the years long research now gone. Having the urge to lay there and cry until morning, you have no choice but to sneak back in the castle.

༺∘◦ ❀ ◦∘༻

"Who do you think that bloke was, Prongs?" Sirius asks as they sit beside Remus's hospital wing bed. "Doesn't matter now, does it? Whoever they are, they shouldn't have been idiotic enough to take a walk in the forest during a full moon," James says rather loudly.

"How 'bout you, Moons, who do you bet was it?" Peter pipes up.

"Doesn't matter, I could've killed them, worse, I could've bitten them," Remus says weakly.

Sirius brushes it off with a whole new full-proof plan for the next full moon. Something that Remus doesn't look forward to, but somehow enjoy with his friends' company. The marauders later spends the whole weekday morning in the hospital wing with the food Sirius, James and Peter got from the kitchens. The topics change each moment, until James finds a way to mock Sirius with his failed attempts at flirting with you.

"Just go talk to her!" James says between laughs.

"She doesn't even acknowledge me."

"I don't think so, it was only last quidditch practice when I heard her yell, suck it Black, when you got hit by a bludger." James, Remus and Peter laughs as Sirius's eyes widen.

Before Sirius could retort, "I gotta go prepare for my date with Evans now." James suddenly gets up, hastily messing up his hair and pocketing some sweets as his friends laugh at his ridiculous behavior.

"I'll stay here and finish these," Peter says while munching on some toast.

"I still want to know who's the owner of the journal I found a while ago. You sure you'll be good here, mate?" Sirius asks, to which Remus replies with a nod and goodluck.

༺∘◦ ❀ ◦∘༻

You're trying out spells to hide your puffy eyes from crying throughout dawn, frustratedly healing wounds. You don't want to miss breakfast to avoid suspicion, but it's hard to act normal. You finally look decent enough to your liking, but the potion made from the ingredients in your trunk did not do well on a gash on the back of your right hand, leaving a bruise. You decide to hide it in your Hogwarts robes and eat breakfast quickly.

After breakfast, you find yourself staring at the raven haired boy at the end of the hallway. Not that you expect him to care or notice you, but an inch of hope is still there. His usual unkempt hair that touches his face with such grace is just one of the many things you find attractive about him, but there was something different this time. He was holding a book, a very unusual thing to see since it's weekend.

You gasp as you walk closer in his direction, it's your journal. The thing you poured hardwork on, contains researches, discoveries and a list of dreams that had been ridiculed by your own parents. It was an extension of your soul, and it was being held by the Sirius Black.

He noticed you staring. "What's your deal, y/l/n, did you ran out of ridiculous potions to dye your hair y/h/c?"

You snap back from your thoughts. "Just a near-death experience, Black. And for the record, my hair is naturally y/h/c."

You turn around with a pounding heart. How did he find the journal? Did he read the contents? Was it that embarrassing?

Sirius watched you walk away. What does she mean by near death experience?

He looks at the journal, scans it for the second time since he found it this dawn. It's well-written and perfectly organized. He could swear he had seen the handwriting before, and the initials scribbled at the first page. Sirius decides to follow you to see if his guess is right.

༺∘◦ ❀ ◦∘༻

You sit on a part of the Hogwarts grounds away from other students, having trouble figuring out how did Sirius got your journal.

"You could've just told me this was yours."

You almost got a whiplash with Sirius's voice appearing out of nowhere. You just stared at him, examining his sharp features under the sun.

"What do you want?"

"Do you want this back?" he says, lightly waving the journal in front of you.

With a sigh, you spoke softly, "yeah. Can I have it now?"

"No."

"What?" You ask in disbelief, standing up to look at his silvery eyes.

"No, you have to reach it."

You want to whip out your wand and Accio the journal but Sirius's grin made you reach out as he waves it high above your head.

"What's wrong with your hand?" You freeze and hastily adjust your sleeves to cover it.

"You know what, I'm going back to the castle," you say half-heartedly.

"Who did this to you? I'll hex them."

"A tree branch. I would very much enjoy watching you hex it. You'll look more stupid than you already are."

"As much as I love the idea, let me see your hand first. Sirius's gentle voice almost melted you while reluctantly showing the bruise on the back of your hand. Sirius holds it, muttering an incantation under his breath. The bruise disappears in an instant.

You fill up with sudden gratitude and mixed emotions.

"I owe y—"

"No you don't. I'm doing this because I want to, deal with it. Now, tell me where you hurt yourself. Then I'll let you have your journal back."

"Why do you care anyways? I told you, I got hurt from a tree branch."

"That bruise is a cause of a potion applied on a deep gash lacking the proper incantation. What were you doing in the forbidden forest?"

"Speaking from experiences, are we, Black?" You say, highly amused. "I was just wandering around and dropped it. Are you done?"

"No, I know the easiest kind of lying is when you leave things out of a story. You could've been bitten or got killed. You're lucky Prongs and I saw you first."

You almost choked. "Excuse me? I don't know what you're talking abou—"

"I was there, me and my friends. It's a long story, y/n, so could you start first?" Your cheeks heat up at the sound of Sirius saying your first name.

"I don't think you'll understand, I'm my parent's disappointment, I'm the opposite of what they want me to be. Instead of doing my purpose, I'm out here wasting my time, trying to cope using the dumbest ways possible." You start venting out as you sit on the grass beside him.

"Believe me, I know exactly what that feels like, love." They both mentally freeze as the words slip though his mouth.

"I go through the forest just to write about the things I find there. Something I couldn't get from sitting in the library. That journal contains my hard work."

"I can tell. It's impressive and elaborate."

"Uhm, thanks. Y-you wouldn't tell anyone I was in the forest, would you?" You say hesitantly.

"If I'd tell the professors about your midnight strolls, I might as well be turning the marauders in for expulsion."

"Marauders?"

"It's my turn to explain," Sirius utters with a sigh.

You watch the handsome boy talk about his friends; how they had to transform into Animagi for the sake of keeping their friend's company—which greatly impressed you—and their mischievous whereabouts. You've never heard Sirius speak this gentle.

There so many things you wanted to say, but can't form words. "Sirius..."

His eyes meet yours for the first time you mentioned his name, and it's in a tone that he wouldn't trade for the world.

"...can I visit Remus?" you continue.

He smiles at you—a genuine smile that made your heart leap—and takes you back to the castle without a word. He gives the journal to you on the way.

Your steps are slow and steady, as if the air has never been more comfortable. You finally got to the hospital wing, and see Remus lying in bed, reading a book next to a pile of sweets his friends placed there. He looks at the two of you with a questioning stare.

"Remus, I... I was the person who saw you in the forest. Sirius told me about..."

"I'm sorry."

You felt taken aback with Remus's response.

"No, I should be sorry, I wasn't thinking. I shouldn't have been sneaking around late at night."

"That's actually a difficult habit to stop, y/n. Not that I tried," Sirius pipes up, earning chuckles from you and Remus.

You eventually become good friends with the marauders. Remus is glad you become friends because of his condition, and not inspite of it. Sirius would always ask about your day, which earns a lot of teases from James. You would still walk through the forbidden forest sometimes, but Sirius is always there to accompany you.

༺∘◦ ❀ ◦∘༻

Your NEWTs were coming near and Remus studied with you in the Gryffindor common room. It was late at night and completely silent, except for your small discussions about some topics. Several minutes pass and you find yourself talking about your feelings for Sirius, to which Remus never fail to respond with the best advices.

"Sometimes I wonder if Sirius feels the same..."

"You don't have to wonder," Remus says.

"Why?"

"Because he's right behind you." You almost jump as you hear him speak. "Mind to take a break from studying, y/n?"

You look at Remus, who shrugged with a smile. You get up and take a walk with Sirius. It was a comfortable silence, casually avoiding spots where you know people can see you and get you in detention. Your mind was going places thinking about a possible future with him. You didn't even realize you're in the astronomy tower if it wasn't for the sudden hug if cold air. You watch his eyes sparkle under the stars, standing at the huge overview of the tower.

"You wanna know how I feel about you?" You gulp at the way he broke the silence. You don't think you'll ever be ready to know. Your eyes finally met and it sent your bones to flames.

"I love you, y/n. And I've never felt more sure about anything in the world, fuck that, you are my world." The sincerity in his tone melted your brain, you couldn't string up a word.

"I can't believe we're finally here." Your throat starts to tighten with the struggle of words. "I was so scared to lose you, but I was also scared to say anything."

"Does that mean...?"

"Face first to the point and you still missed it. Of course I love you too, you idiot!"

You laugh as you jump into his arms, he gladly hugs you tight. The warmth and comfort that you felt contrasting to the cold night air felt so right.

"Hogsmeade, this weekend?" He whispers to your ear which sends shivers through your spine.

"Yes, but I don't wanna end up in detention after that."

"That's also a good idea for a first date."

You let go of the hug to look at his face.

"There's a fine line between liking you and wanting to hex you to oblivion."

"And I cross it everytime."

"Oh yes you do."

"You love it though."

"Hmm...yes I do."

With one meaningful look in his face, you press your lips against his. It's soft and gentle, firm and promising. His hand cups your face, thumb caressing your cheek. You wrap your arms around his warm body, feeling his heartbeat under his perfectly chiseled chest. After what seems like a beautiful forever, you pull away. The second you back up, a whistle and cheering made you jump.

"Prongs, Wormtail, what the hell are you doing here?" Sirius called the crackheads by the door.

"We saw you in the map, thought we've come to see the show," James says smugly.

"Want a treacle tart, y/n?" Peter says while holding half a dozen of them.

"No thanks I—"

"Hey, I thought you snuck out to the kitchens to get those for me?" You hear the distant voice of Remus, who clearly made an effort to leave his studies just to get his friends away from trouble.

"Nah Moons, 'tis the best part right here, I wanna know if Sirius messed this up," James continues with such a bright tone.

"Oh sod off, mate!" Sirius laughs as Remus take the two grown children away.

"Where were we?" You coo.

His lips brush yours passionately, like a fiery tease. You barely had a second to react and you already granted his tongue in the seam of your lips. He delved in your mouth, making you breathless. Your arms travels up to tangle around his neck to his luscious black hair. He pulls you even closer and you inhale sharply as his lips form into a smirk. He began peppering your neck with delicate kisses. You can't get enough of it, you let out pleasured tones that feels like godly music to him.

"Please, Siri... I need you."

"Absolutely, love. I will be gentle and make sure you can still walk after."

"I have seen your exes walk, no you won't," you reply. He chuckles between kisses that turned you on even more. The rest of the night will forever be one of the best things you've ever experienced.

༺∘◦ ❀ ◦∘༻

After graduating, you and Sirius joined the Order, fighting with and for each other.

One day, you and Sirius comes home from an Order mission, you have a slight bruise on your hand after falling over once in a duel with a Deatheater.

"What's wrong with your hand?" Sirius asks. Your lips forms a smile at the sudden flashback of his words.

"It's not holding yours," you reply. He lets out a bark of laughter as he checks your hand. His laugh is the nicest thing to watch and listen to.

"Wanna know what's wrong with your hands?" you ask him.

"Hmm?"

"They're not around my neck." Before you even finish the sentence you both are already laughing loudly.

He did fix what's wrong with his hand later that day, which you absolutely love.

You continue writing all your researches on your journal as you participate in the war. It all paid off because of Sirius, despite your parents' disapproval. You're with him and that's all that matters.

You eventually publish several informative books, with Sirius always by your side to support you. You both are proud of the fact that your books became the foundation research for Damocles Belby in creating the wolfsbane potion.

#Sirius Black x reader #sirius black x you #sirius black smut #marauders x reader #sirius black fanfic #marauders era #ben barnes #harry potter fanfiction #young sirius black #marauders imagine #sirius black fluff

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greywindys · 2 years

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Going off of your unpopular opinion. I've also been wondering why gorillaz feels narratively hollow and I'm sure to an extent it's for commercial appeal, but i also think it's just significantly more visually focused now. Cause Hewlett has kind of entered his Andy Warhol era, it's bound to feel more commercial but i still think it's genuinely expressive. Unfortunately pop art rarely caries much narrative or meaning, unlike the punk artstyle of the first phases. Also the new writters are not Cass Browne: random musician that has never written before but pops off for some reason. They don't seem to write with equal abandon, and even if it turned out problematic at times, it's incomparable creatively. Them holding back I think also has something to do with the falling out that happened during plastic beach in terms of how much space over the music the story was taking.

Hey there! I'm really curious to know what about Jamie's current style is similar to that of Warhol. Or are you referring to his work outside of Gorillaz? This is a genuine question. I'm far from a technical art expert, but when I look at his recent Gorillaz art, I don't see a lot of similarities. I also understand that it's been a little while since you sent this, so you may not see this answer lol. I'll open it up to whoever has any insight on this topic.

That all being said, I think the lack of narrative can be attributed to what appears to be lack of communication between the three "ingredients" that make Gorillaz. Jamie, as I understand it, has always come up with a few "plot" points, but generally leaves it to whoever is writing, Ed seems like he's been left to figure out the lore on his own, and Damon has never really involved himself with the characters save for a few instances, and he doesn't put a lot of effort into remembering the lore or writing songs for the "plot." They’re all on different pages and don’t check to get on the same page. Like, idt Damon would have described “Souk Eye” as a love song if he knew the writing team was making 2D’s journal depict the song as being about Murdoc, lbr lmao. As a result , the continuity suffers. Whether this is intentional or not, I couldn't say, but the way it affects the continuity is a lot more apparent now, imo. And that's not counting external factors. I agree too, that Jamon's relationship changed after PB, which also could be affecting things.

But personally, I don't really care about plot (arguably, Gorillaz never was plot focused). PB is my least favorite phase and I'd honestly rather they avoid attempting something like that in the future because I don't think they could execute it well, see: SM S1...which I do enjoy to some extent, but depicting something like 2D saving Murdoc, as much as I loved it, requires build up that they didn't do and probably don't want to do and will probably forget ore retcon by next phase. I have my pipe dreams, but what I hope for the most is continuity of characterizations between phases, meaningful character interactions, some connection to the music. They don't need a big plot with a ~villain to do that. And that's what's frustrated me in the past - that they have trouble settling on what they want the band to be (big plot vs random banter) and relying on what fans want to happen (more recently) over remembering their own lore. They just...don't seem to care, which isn't the case, I know (Jamies wouldn’t have drawn out a bajillion music videos last phase if they didn’t) but that's just how a lot of the recent character content and unprofessional decisions (VoTP video, Noodle’s old VA etc) comes across.

#asks.#Anonymous

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