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tojiscumdumpster · 4 months

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⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။||||။ knockout x renji abarai

✧ summary there’s no better way for renji to celebrate a big win than to spend the night with y/n.

✧ content warnings reader described as a black woman who uses she/pronouns. feisty!reader, chubby!reader x undergroundfighter!renji. modern au — no bleach verse. told in first POV — renji’s. mentions of stitches and bruises. usage of profanity, praise kink, cowgirl position, nipple play, facefucking — renji will finish in reader’s, squirting. terms of endearment — baby, sweetheart, angel, etc. reader and renji are in their late twenties.

✧ author’s note hello, hello. i am here with a fic that’s not jjk for once in my life, lmfao. this idea has been in my drafts since january 2023, and it was just sitting there collecting dusts on my old tumblr. but i said i was going to do more bleach characters, so here we go. first time writing renji, so if this ain’t how you see him, oops. still enjoy. also didn't really focus on the underground!fighter portion as much. but maybe i will if there's a next time. support me by liking, commenting, and reblogging this post. i would greatly appreciate it. AGELESS/BLANK BLOGS AND MINORS— DO NOT INTERACT.

I know she told me not to come by after the fight, but I needed to.

I won.

I fucking won, and there’s no other way for me to celebrate winning ten thousand dollars than to be with Y/N.

Well, that’s if she’s still not mad at me.

Before I left for my match, we got into an argument. A huge one. She doesn’t like that I fight for a living, let alone illegal underground fighting. I mean—I get it. Seeing someone you care about constantly getting his ass beat isn’t a sight worth seeing.

But fighting is all I know.

I had a shitty childhood. Didn’t know who the hell my parents were since they gave me up at birth for adoption. Jump around in foster care homes until the mothers got sick of me and kicked me out in the streets. Survival was basically forced on me.

Fighting is what kept me alive. For food. Clothes. A place to lay my head. Whether I lost or won, I know the reason why I’m alive today is because I’m a fighter.

It wasn’t until I was eighteen when I found out about the world of underground fighting. Ten years deep and I know nothing else.

Y/N knows this about me. She understands I didn’t have it easy and never judged me. But that doesn’t mean she agrees with my lifestyle.

She came to a few fights in the beginning. Eventually, she got tired of seeing me stitched up almost every weekend.

Shit, me too.

However, after tonight, I feel good about my future wins. I busted my ass in training, so now I don’t have to hear shit about anymore losses.

Even if right now I’m stitched up and have a black eye. I feel good.

Great.

Better if Y/N opens the door after keeping me waiting out in the cold for the past ten minutes.

I know she’s awake. She has a habit of staying up late, studying for med school. And plus, I haven’t messaged or called her yet. Despite her not showing up to my fights, she still wants an update afterwards that I made it out alive.

“Y/N, let me in,” I say, knocking loudly on her apartment door. “You know I don’t care about making a scene.”

After a few more obnoxious knocks, the door finally swings open and I am met with deep russet skin, tight curls, and chocolate-colored eyes that pierce an annoyed look in my direction.

“What do you want?” She bites out. “I’m busy.”

I smirk and hold the bag of money in the air. “I won.”

“Congrats.” Her tone is flat and she tries to slam the door in my face, but I placed my foot to stop it from closing. “Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously. Are you really still mad at me?” I teasingly ask.

“You won. I said congrats. What more do you want?”

I shrugged. “I’m locked out of my apartment.”

She arches a brow at me, already recognizing my bullshit ass excuse of being locked out of my apartment.

Y/N knows me. She knows I would do anything to be in her presence, so going back and forth in forty degree weather is pointless.

Her pretty brown hues travels across my face and body, examining the stitches and bruises that probably has her wondering, who the fuck treated him?

Me. But that’s besides the point.

A deep sign escapes her mouth when she realizes I’m not going anywhere until she lets me in, so she opens her door wider and turns her back to me to walk further inside her apartment.

“Sit,” she orders, which I happily do so while chuckling to myself.

While Y/N goes to the bathroom (assuming she’s getting a med kit to fix my shitty patch job), I take advantage of staring at her round ass that’s barely covered in those tiny boy shorts. Every step she takes it jiggles, creating an ocean of waves I’m eager to swim in.

I get comfortable while I wait, taking off my skully, sweater, and any other form of heavy clothing that would cause me to sweat in her heated apartment.

“I’m going to start charging you if you keep fucking coming to my apartment like this, Renji,” Y/N snapped, walking with the kit in her hand as expected.

“Outside of paying for your tuition, I can think of other ways to repay you.”

She rolls her eyes at my suggestive comment. “Get over yourself, Abarai.”

I let out a snort before she stands in front of me and tilt up my chin to start making work on my face.

She’s cute when she’s mad. Huffing and puffing while whispering slick comments under breath. But how she’s handling my face by moving it around with force rushes blood straight to my groin.

I’m getting hard.

Hard as shit, and it’s not helping that I’m in close proximity with her.

That jasmine lavender scent that circulates through my senses. Looking up at her full lips that’s coated with gloss. Then, lowering my gaze to her tits that’s big, naturally saggy, and pretty. My mouth is watering at the sight of her nipples hardening.

And I don’t know if it’s because she feels that I’m checking her out or the coldness outside is affecting her.

Either way, I’ll act on it.

Taking it upon myself, I grab the back of her thighs to pull her on my lap. As if she’s used to my antics, it doesn’t catch her off guard and she continues to clean up my wounds.

“You’re all bloody up with a black eye and somehow you still have the energy to be a pervert,” she retorts.

I move one of hands to her ass, massaging comforting circles. “For you? Yeah.”

The quiet between us was comfortable until she opted to speak again. “So… who’d you fight?”

“Some huge motherfucker. I thought I was going to die.”

She leans back to grab more alcohol and dabs it above my brow. “Maybe that’s what needed to have you stop fucking fighting.”

I throw my head back to laugh, but she grabs my chin to bring my face forward. “Like you want me dead.” My hands creep beneath her cheeks to pull her closer to me and apply more pressure to my cock. “That’s what you want?”

“That came out my mouth, Abarai?”

“Why are you still mad at me?”

She scoffs. “Why am I mad that you’re practically coming to me everyday with a busted face and broken ribs?” That’s one thing I love about Y/N—her feisty personality. It turns me on so fucking much because I know when I fuck her, it’ll be a different story.

Continuing, she says, “I think I would be a little more satisfied if you did this professionally as opposed to underground. Underground doesn’t come with insurance, Ren.”

“Aw, you care about me that much?” My question was supposed to be posed as a joke, but the look on her pretty face says otherwise.

“Fucking asshole. I don’t know why I still deal with your ass.”

“Probably because you love me.”

“Probably not.”

Gripping her hips, I pull her with me and lean back into the headrest of the couch. We’re inches away from our mouths cooling and I take advantage of this proximity by basking in her sweet smelling breath and beauty.

Simply because Y/N exists, my cocks hardens for her. Holding her in my arms. Feeling her pussy against my erection and breasts suffocating pressed on my chest. Girlfriend or not, she’s mine.

And she knows it.

I can see how she looks at me, even when mad, that she cares and loves me. Y/N is a tough girl. I can only imagine what she’s been through. Still, she manages to soften up just for me.

We never made it official since she doesn’t approve of the underground shit, but that doesn’t mean I’ll ever stop asking.

“So when are you going to say yes to being my girlfriend?” I whisper.

She tries breaking from my embrace, but I tighten my grip. “Renji…”

“You feel my dick pressed against you, right? It only makes it harder when you say my name like that, Y/N.”

“Be real with me… will you keep doing this shit forever?” Her eyes waver as she awaits my answer and I can’t help the guilt from pinging my chest.

“If it lessens my chance of being with you, no.”

She searches my face for hesitance or deceit, however, she finds nothing because I meant what I said. Y/N is the only person that looks at me like I’m a human, and I wouldn’t let my obsession with fighting get in the way of our future together.

How she tucks her coil behind her ear and nips down on her lower lip shows me the bit of vulnerability she reserves for me.

So—I take advantage of it.

In less than three seconds my lips were on hers. I take my time relishing those sweet, plump and plush, strawberry flavored lips.

I can feel the skepticism from Y/N while kissing her, maybe because she’s trying to put on this show that she’s still mad at me. But soon, her rigid body melts into mine and returns the kiss.

Our heavy breaths mingle, increasing in speed the more aggressive we lock lips. She begins rolling her hips onto my cock and I let out a grunt, feeling the moisture of her pussy liquefying on me.

The slaps I leave on her ass are harsh, causing her to bite my bottom lip and suck it into her mouth. Y/N is so fucking aggressive it drives me nuts. She gives me a high and adrenaline not even a fight could give.

“Pull your dick out, Ren,” she orders through muffled moans and our kiss.

“Fucking bossing me around to give you cock? Not mad at me anymore?” Y/N ignores my taunt and works her hands between us to untie my sweats. I hiss at the feel of her cool hands engulfing my dick to give it a few pumps.

She must not know what her touch does to me. She handles my cock like she owns it, and gosh, I fucking love that shit. My fingers gently tangle into her coils to deepen our kiss, but she soon gets up to strip her clothes.

Fuck… Fuck, she’s so goddamn sexy. I’ll never get tired of her thick body, filled with soft dips and curves. I look at her, observe her like she’s an expensive piece of art hung up at a museum because that’s what I see her as.

Pretty pussy leaking arousal and I smirk to myself, thinking how she had all that attitude earlier while being wet for me like she didn’t want me inside of her.

“You’re fucking beautiful. You know that?” I ask, massaging her tits and looking up at her. “You still have that attitude or are you going to come ride my cock like a good girl?”

She gently pushes me back against the couch with her lips on mine and straddles my lap. “Depends on if you’re going to be a good boy and take this pussy.”

“Shit, angel. I will.”

Y/N hums while reaching around to align my cock with her sex. Two seconds later, she slowly sinks down my length until I’m buried into the hilt. That soft lingering fuck that slips past her pretty lips sounds sexy as hell and has my dick twitching in response.

I can’t bust now. Not yet. Even if the tightness and heat of her pussy pushes me off the edge of a mountain. Her pussy is so warm, so fucking warm, fat, and wet. Gosh, I don’t ever think I can be without this pussy.

I throw my head back and savor this feeling, but Y/N had other plans for me.

“Remember to look at me when I’m riding you, Ren,” she coos. “Eyes on me, baby. I want you to see how much I love this dick inside my pussy.”

Fucking Christ. “Tell me how much you love it while bouncing on me.”

And she does just that. Telling me how big and girthy I am, that she’s sorry for giving me attitude and admits that she just wanted dick. But no. I want her to fuck me like she’s mad. I need that type of energy pumping through my veins after this win tonight.

I reassure Y/N and tell her to fuck me harder. Her pace quickens and slaps her ass fervently against my cock. I can’t stop moaning her name. The wet slippery noises coming from her pussy increases in volume and it creates a mess between us.

This is where I belong, deep in her pussy and feeling her walls squeeze the hell out of me. I don’t even hold her hips or waist. I relax comfortably with my arms sprawl over the top of her couch, watching how gorgeous she looks while fucking what’s hers.

“Oh, fuck, Renji,” she moans, tugging her lips inwards and lolling her head to the side in complete pleasure.

Those perfect, full tits bounces in my face and I can’t help but stare and become mesmerized. Light marks that resemble tiger stripes decorated the valley of breasts. Her nipples, pebbled and straining underneath my gaze, look desperate for my touch.

I take it upon myself to pinch them between my fingers and a soft shriek escapes her mouth, further arching her back.

Y/N keeps getting wetter by the second, every bounce she makes. And hearing her sticky arousal, I know and see how she’s creaming my cock. Purposely, I sit myself on the couch, thrusting up in her a bit to feel my head hit her g spot.

“Ren, help me little,” she begs through a whimper. “Fuck me back.”

I caress her cheeks with the back of my head. “Yeah? You want me to help you, sweetheart?”

“Please.”

God, I love it when she’s needy for me like this.

In no time, my hands are at her waist and my thrusts meet with her jumping movements. Y/N isn't loud when it comes to her sounds of pleasure. Vocal, yes. But right now, her moans and whimpers are louder than usual.

It’s like she needed my dick inside of pussy just as much as I needed it.

I see the desire in her brown hues. I feel the heat radiating off Y/N’s skin while my fingers dig into her flesh, holding her in place to pound upwards into her pussy.

This is what I wanted—to fuck my girl after a well deserved win. And she’s going to congratulate me how I want.

My lips are at her neck leaving wet kisses and sucking her flesh until purple specks form. “Coming home to this good fucking pussy. Gosh, I love how you feel, angel. Going to fucking mean it now when you say congrats?”

“Congratulations, baby,” she purrs, slamming harder on my cock. “You did good… so damn good, Ren.”

I hum, dragging my tongue along her neck. “That’s what I wanted to hear.”

Y/N continues to gasps out her pleas for me to fuck harder. I comply… I comply in helping my pretty girl come and savor the look when she washes over me. My grips are firm on her waist, betting that’ll leave marks when she wakes up the next poor, and drive my cock deeper into her pussy.

I’m in pure awe. I feel my own releasing catching up to me the more I watch her take me. This is my woman. My fucking girl. I come home to this every night after every fight to hold her in my arms and fuck her.

Her name from my mouth sounds like a broken record when I moan her name. This fat, gushy, slick and tight pussy has this power over me. She won’t stop fucking squeezing me, I can’t prevent my face from growing hot. It’s intense how I feel right now, and it’s all because of Y/N.

“Good, good fucking pussy. God, you’re so fucking good to me, angel face,” I rasp, pecking her lips. “You’re going to come for me?”

“Yes, Renji, baby. I’m going to come. Keep giving me that dick. Please don’t stop, please.”

“Put your fingers in my mouth.” She does quick with my command. I suck on her digits and coat them well with saliva before pushing them out of my mouth. “Now rub your clit, pretty girl. I wanna see you squirt everywhere.”

Because she’s overwhelmed with arousal, Y/N stops bouncing on my cock and allows me to fuck her while she plays with clit. Her mouth hangs gape, drool slightly coating the side of her mouth and breathing heavily.

My balls slap her ass. My head kisses her soft cushion repeatedly. Her velvet walls transfer warmth to my cock and the bubble that rests in the pit of my stomach is on the verge of explosion.

I’m about to come. Hard.

But I need her to come first.

“Fucking come for me, Y/N. Keep playing with that pretty pussy and moan my name,” I grit out, pushing past all my thrusts.

“Right there, Renji. Keep fucking me right there… I’m–oh, fuck–I’m coming.”

She’s so pretty when she comes. Dark brown porcelain complexion, slick with sweat. Eyes rolling to the back of her head. Pussy clenching and unclenching around my cock. Moaning, whimpering my name back to back.

She’s breathless. Flawless. I have this image of her painted perfectly in my mind. Watching Y/N come, makes me come, so I make quick work to pull her off my lap. And she knows exactly what I want–to fuck my release down her throat.

Her mouth is as warm as her pussy, and I let out hitched breaths and harsh grunts when she swallows me whole. I’m relentless when forcing her head down on my cock as I facefuck her. The gurgling noises she makes are obscene. Pornogrpahic, even.

And what caused my come to shoot through her mouth is seeing that she’s still massaging her clit, eventually squirting all over her wooden floors.

My hips stutter and I throw my head back to moan into the air. “Fuck, Y/N! That’s my fucking girl. Look at you making a mess while choking on my cock and swallowing my come.”

Y/N takes it upon herself to wrap her lips tighter around my cock and massage my balls, ensuring every single last of my nut has released in her mouth. I take it for a while, but I soon become sensitive, practically feeling my skin being sucked off.

“Easy now, angel,” I say through an airy chuckle. I pull my cock out and her mouth echoes a pop sound.

She whines a little because I’m no longer in her mouth and it causes me to smirk because it wasn’t too long ago where she acted like she hated me.

My hand grasps her chin and guides it upwards to meet with my eyes. “You swallowed for me, Y/N? Open up.” She nods, sticking her tongue out. “Perfect.”

“You’re going to fuck me again?” She asks, catching her bottom lip between her teeth.”

Gosh, this woman will be the death of me.

tags: @dejwrld @hvshinas @diamondoidxx @xxjazzxx @thegirlwonder1 @ryukenzz @maiapuhpaia @elitesanjisimp @amyrahrose @sweetpeachies @abigolemess @linastired @diorsbrando @starrygetou @niya729 (if i didn't tag you it's because tumblr wouldn't have your user pop up)

#anime x black!reader #anime x reader #bleach x black reader #bleach x reader #bleach smut #fanfic smut #renji x reader #renji x black reader #renji abarai x reader #renji abarai x black reader #bleach fanfic

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ladamedusoif · 4 months

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able

(Joel Miller x disabled F!Reader)

Pairing: Joel Miller x Disabled F!Reader

Summary: "I just don't think she'll be able for patrol". But then it's just you, Joel, and your trusty walking stick in the middle of nowhere...

Content/warnings: Reader is disabled (she has rheumatoid disease/arthritis in addition to panic attacks, she uses a walking stick as necessary); Reader had a sister; Reader is an art teacher; strong violence; blood; description of panic attack; references to impact of chronic illness and disability; references to medication; references to disease and death; non-canon compliant; Jackson!Joel; strong language; ableist language and abusive language

Rating: Mature; 18+ MDNI

Word Count: ~3.7k

A/N: After making a plea earlier in the week for people to actually write disabled Reader fic, as opposed to forcing writers to feel they have to tag literally everything in an able-bodied Reader story, I knew I had to put my money where my mouth was as a disabled, neurodivergent writer with various mental health things going on here and there. And this one-shot is the result.

This one is a little personal. I was diagnosed with rheumatoid disease about ten years ago, and Reader’s experiences are informed by my own (though, thankfully, I haven’t had to contend with an apocalypse that meant I couldn’t access the medication that has kept me going). She’s also inspired by @agentjackdaniels, who acted as consultant extraordinaire on walking sticks and panic attacks, and suggested the Joel picture for the moodboard. Thank you, Luce, for this, for fighting the good fight for representation in fic - and for beta-ing the story.

(A note on terminology: rheumatoid disease/arthritis are sometimes used interchangeably. ‘Arthritis’ often sounds like it’s ‘just’ osteoarthritis to people who don’t know the difference. Rheumatoid, unlike osteoarthritis (which is shitty in its own ways), is a systemic, lifelong, chronic illness and an auto-immune disorder that affects the entire body, not just bones and/or joints. So personally I use ‘rheumatoid disease’ as it conveys more of the impact of the condition. It's also often seen as an 'old person' disease but this simply isn't true - not that this stops mobility aids being modelled by people in their 80s all the time...)

Please follow my writing blog @ladameecrit and turn on notifications to stay up to date with my work.

Dividers by @saradika - moodboard by me

You weren’t supposed to make it.

Twenty-odd years in the apocalypse with your fucked-up joints and no steady supply of the meds that kept you going, pushing through the cycles of fatigue, and fighting off your own goddamned immune system as much as you were fighting clickers and raiders.

You really weren’t supposed to make it. But you had Annie.

You were sharing an apartment when the outbreak happened, a quirk of shitty personal circumstances - she’d just broken up with her long-term boyfriend - that probably helped save your life. Annie was the all-action sister - the kind of person who thinks there’s nothing weird about spending your weekends doing triathlons and “Tough Mudder” challenges, who had a perfect bill of health your entire lives, who bounced out of bed in the mornings while you cracked and creaked and stiffly manoeuvered yourself into being.

The good days generally outweighed the bad in the years between your diagnosis with rheumatoid disease and the initial outbreak - or maybe you had just gotten used to the aches and pains and the occasional flare-ups of fatigue. You invested in a walking stick to help on those days when mobility was particularly bad: solid, heavy, and carved in a pale yellow wood. It felt like a comfort in your hand, more a sign of strength, to you, than of weakness.

Annie helped you through the panic attack that consumed you on outbreak day, working with you to regulate your breathing and relax your tense muscles until you could finally say what was on your mind.

“My meds. What am I going to do without my meds?”

Nothing a quick smash and grab at the local pharmacy couldn’t fix. It was the first of many, stockpiling the little yellow tablets you relied on and taking as many packs of over-the-counter painkillers as you could carry. Useful currency in the apocalypse, as it turned out.

All-Action Annie was never going to cope with life in a QZ. She got the two of you out after months of planning, nights of whispered talk about a town out west that was normal - or something close to it, anyway. She hadn’t entertained your protestations about you slowing her down, holding her back.

“You think I’m leaving behind a girl who’s so handy with a weapon?” she’d teased, pointing to your walking stick. “Be real. We’re busting out together.”

The infection took hold in her about three days from Jackson. Fuckin’ barbed wire, tearing a jagged line through Annie’s hand and leaving behind an old-fashioned kind of threat to life, the kind penicillin had mostly dealt with. But that was then. This was now.

She died in an abandoned farmhouse in the middle of nowhere, you holding her hand until the end, talking to her about your childhoods and trying to keep smiling until she closed her beautiful eyes.

It took all your strength to dig her grave. And then, somehow, you found more.

You weren’t supposed to make it. But you did.

Jackson stands before you.

He sees you for the first time in the community dining hall, talking animatedly to Maria as you hungrily devour the food set in front of you. Eyes wide, face grubby, clothes ragged. Half-wild, he thinks, like most of the new arrivals. Like him and Ellie, once upon a time. He returns to his bowl of soup and his own thoughts - at least, until he’s interrupted by Maria.

“Joel? Want to introduce a new member of the community, just arrived.”

He doesn’t quite know why he’s surprised when he realises you’re leaning on a sturdy hand-carved walking stick in a solid, light yellow wood. Maybe it’s because he knows how physically hard it is to get here. Maybe he just assumed folks who needed a stick wouldn’t have been able to manage the journey.

For a second he can hear Sarah’s voice in his head, chiding him for focusing on what a disabled person can’t do instead of what they can.

“Joel?”

He snaps out of his reverie and looks from Maria to you. “Uh, hi. Sorry, just…sorry. Forgot my manners.”

“I was just saying how glad we are to have someone who can offer some art education in the town, isn’t that right, Joel?”

Your eyes are warm and mischievous as you meet his gaze, silently conveying your amusement at Maria’s rather brusque manner. It’s all Joel can do not to laugh.

“Sure is. You’re an artist, then?”

You shake your head. “Not a real one. I was an art teacher, before. Long time since I created anything, though, so I hope I remember how.”

He smiles softly, his gruff exterior receding a little. “Bet it’s just like riding a bike,” he says, before his face falls as he looks at your walking stick. “Oh, shit. Sorry. I didn’t mean… Shit. Hope I didn’t offend.”

“As it happens, I can ride a bike, Joel. The apocalypse just doesn’t give me much cause to.”

You leave him with a smile and a wink as Maria ushers you to meet other townsfolk. He watches you as you walk away, the tap-tap-tapping of your stick beating out a new rhythm in the heart of Jackson.

You think of Annie every morning when you wake up in the little house you’d been assigned. Sometimes, as you potter around the kitchen, still revelling in the novelty of making yourself morning coffee for the first time in two decades, you even talk to her. You tell her about the town, the townsfolk, your work in the community vegetable garden, your art classes.

“Honestly, An, you wouldn’t believe how popular they are,” you tell the Annie who, in an alternate universe, is sitting at the kitchen table with her own mug of coffee. “I’m setting up extra sessions to cater for demand.”

There’s something uplifting in how hungry the people of Jackson are to make art, no matter their experience or existing skill level. They’ll draw stuff from memory, they’ll dutifully work on a still life, they’ll even traipse outside with you, wooden sketching boards in hand, and make rapid-fire sketches of the goings-on on Main Street.

Joel doesn’t join a class - but the teenage girl Maria refers to as “Joel’s kid” does, all potty-mouthed and enthusiastic and pretty damned talented, to boot. Ellie tells you how she’s pinned up the drawings she’s proudest of in their home, “like our own fuckin’ art gallery or some shit.”

You pull up a tall stool and sit beside her, resting your stick over your thighs. “Joel’s got his guitar and those dumbass model figures he paints,” she continues, leaning around her easel and squinting at the woman who’d volunteered to act as a life model for this week’s classes. “But this shit? This is real art.” She adds a little highlight to the woman’s sweater and leans back to assess the work.

“You probably got exempt from patrols, I’m guessing. On account of the stick, an’ all.”

“Maria asked, and I signed up happily. I got all the way here, didn’t I? I’m sure I can manage patrols. And it’s the least I can do - they’ve even found me some of the medications I need.”

Ellie nods, somewhat convinced, and returns to sketching out the contours around the model’s jaw.

The day of your first patrol arrives. You bundle up and set out early for the stables, allowing extra time to get there on account of the flare-up you’d been experiencing the day before.

You arrive early - just in time, in fact, to overhear a heated conversation between Joel and Maria.

“She’s doing enough, ain’t she? I just don’t think she’ll be able for patrol.”

“You’ve seen her out and about, Joel. She’s mobile. She’s competent. She’s good with the horses. She got all the way here, the last stretch on her own. What more proof do you need?”

“You’re seriously gonna send a woman with a walking stick out on patrol?”

“I seriously am. Sent you and your bad back out, didn’t we?”

“That ain’t the same and you know it.”

“Just saddle the horses, Joel. And, in case you’re wondering - yes, I paired you together deliberately, just until she gets settled.” You hear her footsteps recede as she leaves him.

You had misjudged how much your already-limited grip would be further impeded by the gloves you’re wearing. The stick clatters to the ground.

“Who’s there?”

You emerge from the shadows. “Me. Sorry.”

Joel rolls his eyes and gruffly points out the tack and supplies.

The first patrol passes in silence. You wonder what happened to the softer man you’d caught a glimpse of the first day you arrived.

On the second patrol, you ask him questions about himself. On the third patrol, he asks (fewer) questions about you. By the fourth, you’re having something approximating normal conversation.

“Sarah loved to make all kinds of stuff,” he ventures, leading the way on his chestnut horse. “Those beaded bracelets, that girly Lego in the pink and purple, all of that. My girl had enough Magic Markers to supply a whole elementary school. Maybe two.”

You can hear him smile, even without seeing his face. His shoulders relax a little as he recalls the memory.

“So she was a creative kid?”

“Creative, sporty… she could do anything. Made the school soccer team, she was so proud. Just a…” He pauses. “A great kid.”

There’s a few beats of silence, punctuated only by the sound of the horses snickering and the steady rhythm of their hooves on the ground.

“What about your sister, was she arty like you?”

You’d told him about Annie on the last patrol. This was the first time he’d asked about her explicitly.

“She was the sporty one. I think that’s why I survived so long, truth be told. She was so strong and fast and tough as fuck.”

He chuckles, the burr of his voice resonating in the cold air. “Sounds like a good balance, though.”

“It is - it was. Was.” Your voice grows quieter as you repeat the word to yourself, chest starting to tighten. The horse slows, responding to the tension of your body, as Joel continues to trot on, not realising you’ve come to a halt behind him.

And then the tell-tale snapping of a twig, the sound of footsteps, and the realisation there’s someone else there, emerging out of the woods. Two someones.

Raiders.

The panic attack that has been building inside you gives way. An innate fight or flight response kicks in as you roar his name.

Joel turns and charges back towards you, just in time to see you take out one raider with a crack shot from your pistol. He slows the horse and readies his rifle, staring at the other man who is now trying to haul you off your mount.

“Get the fuck off me, motherfucker!” You flail against him, desperately shifting your weight to the other side of the saddle to try to shake him off.

Joel takes aim.

You think you’ve kicked the raider off. And that’s when you hit the ground.

He can’t take the shot now, not with her half-hidden from his view and audibly fighting off the man who’s dragged her to the ground. Joel is still a little distance away, slightly too far to see exactly what’s happening.

Why didn’t he hear her slowing? Why didn’t he realise she was further behind than she ought to be? Why did she slow in the fuckin’ first place?

Joel quickly dismounts, rifle in hand, moving closer so he can get a clearer shot at the guy who’s now standing over her. The horse’s elegant neck obscures the raider’s hands from Joel’s vision - he has no idea if he’s pointing a gun at her or not.

He thinks he has a clear sight on the guy’s head, provided he stays in the same position. He readies the rifle.

Suddenly, the raider disappears, letting out a primal roar before he hits the ground.

“You fucking cunt!”

Joel can see she’s standing now, the man prone before her. As he rounds the horse he sees her lift her cane, hands securely gripping the pointed end of the stick.

She brings the solid, weighty handle down on the raider’s leg with a sickening crunch. Even Joel recoils a little at the sight and the sound.

“F-f-fucking…c-c-cunt!”

Thwack. The other leg.

Fuck. She knows exactly what she’s doing.

”Keep calling me that, and I’ll keep the blows coming.”

Holy fuck. Who is she?

”C-c-c-cripple.”

”Excuse me?”

The raider props himself up on his arms. “I said, cripple. Fucking crippled cunt.”

“You shut your fuckin’ mouth.” Joel cocks his rifle.

The stranger sneers at Joel. “Awww, he’s actin’ the big man now. Weren’t too quick gettin’ back down here to save your cripple woman, were ya?”

Before Joel can react, she swings her stick over her head and brings it down on the man’s skull with a furious scream that seems to come from the very depths of her being.

She screams and screams as she hits him, over and over, eyes wild in her blood-spattered face. Joel recognises this: in himself; hell, in Ellie. It’s the moment when the floodgates open and all those years of pain blend together and zone in on this convenient target, an avatar for everyone and everything who had forced loss and trauma upon you.

He roars at her to stop, but knows she can’t hear him. It’s just her and the raider, now: her rage and fear and grief finding their expression through a walking stick turned cudgel.

A single shot ends it. She turns sharply, as if snapped out of a trance, and sees the smoke leaving Joel’s pistol.

“Hey. Hey. You alright?” His broad hands grip your biceps as he looks into your eyes.

Yes, you tell him, yes. You’re fine. But Joel keeps asking.

“Talk to me. Are you okay? I’m worried about you. Please, just talk to me.”

You are moving your mouth, but no sound is coming out. The familiar vice is tightening around your chest. You look down at your blood-stained hands and you struggle to breathe.

“‘M dying, Joel. Can’t breathe. All the blood. So much. Why can’t I breathe?”

Oh, he realises with a pang. She gets these things too. And I know how to help.

“You’re okay, you hear?” He’s rubbing your arms gently, keeping his gaze on you. “You’re alright. Breathe along with me, okay?”

It’s difficult to find the rhythm, at first. Joel’s hands find yours and squeeze them in time with his breath.

”In through your nose, that’s it. Slow and steady. Now out through your mouth.”

He can see your muscles starting to visibly relax. A wave of relief courses over him.

”Yeah, that’s it - you got this. You got this, good girl, you’re just fine. Gonna be alright.”

When he’s confident your breathing has settled and the panic attack receded somewhat, he gently guides you away from the body of the dead raider, one hand holding your horse’s bridle and the other holding yours.

“Why don’t you have a seat for a minute, huh?” Joel gestures to a long, low tree trunk lying near the forest’s edge and opens his saddlebags, rummaging until he finds a cloth, a battered hip flask and a bag of dried apple slices.

”Here.” He wipes the blood as best he can from your hands and proffers the flask, settling his substantial frame beside you on the log. “Have a sip or two, just to relax you a little bit more. Got a snack, here, too.”

You flinch at the taste of the liquor, but take a second sip regardless. The apple slices barely taste of anything in the afterburn of the moonshine. Joel nibbles on some jerky and stares into the middle distance.

You take a break from patrol, agreed with Maria, and a few days off your art classes. It was tempting to keep going, to return to the light and airy studio and to your students. But you feared a relapse.

And your body needed to recover physically, too. You ached from head to toe, fingers and toes puffy and swollen and movement seriously restricted. You ration out the supply of medication you’ve secured since getting here, and use hot water bottles and plenty of rest to try to ride out the flare in your arthritis.

Three days after the incident, there’s a knock on the door. You hobble to answer it, leaning on your trusty stick for support.

”Came by to see how you were doing. Got you some things if you needed ‘em.”

Joel is standing on your front porch, holding a jute grocery bag. He pauses, as if waiting for you to give him permission to say more.

”That’s so very kind of you, Joel. Come in, won’t you? I was able to set a fire so it’s nice and cosy.”

He watches as you lead the way into the living room, noting how much slower you were today. Guilt laps at his conscience. He said she shouldn’t go on patrol. He knew.

”You want me to bring these into the kitchen for you?”

“That would be a great help. Thank you.” He’s glad to see you smile, after the trauma of the patrol. “If you want a drink, I’ve got some tea and coffee in the cupboard just to the left of the sink.”

He pops his head back into the living room. “What would you like?”

“A tea would be perfect. Mugs are in the cupboard to the right.”

You wrap yourself back up in your blankets on the couch, making room for Joel when he returns with the drinks and a couple of cookies, sent over by Ellie as part of his care package for you. The mug feels like a comfort in your aching hands, its heat assuaging the inflammation ravaging your joints.

He sips his coffee and you sit in silence for a little bit, watching the flames dance over the firewood.

“Have you, uh - you been okay, doing okay, since…”

Joel stares into his coffee cup and then looks at you, a little awkward. You smile, hoping to reassure him.

”I’ve been okay. Just the physical pain and exhaustion, mostly. And - well, you saw it. The panic. It can leave you drained.”

He nods and takes another swig of his drink. “I know. I - I’ve had times like that, too. Real fuckin’ scary, when you’ve never gone through it before.”

You study his face for a moment or two, noting the little scar on his temple, the lines on his face, the stern expression completely undermined by the warmth of his deep brown eyes. For an instant, he seems so vulnerable, this strong, tough man sitting on your little couch.

“I haven’t had an attack like that in a while. But then, I hadn’t done anything like that in a while.”

This time Joel turns to look at you properly. “Not your first rodeo, huh?”

You giggle at the turn of phrase. “Not quite. Let’s just say my stick did a lot of work over the last twenty years. He wasn’t the first to feel the brunt of it.”

Joel nods, and you feel strangely relieved that he doesn’t seem surprised. “Doesn’t get easier, though, does it?”

“It does not. Which is why it’s better to avoid having to do it.”

”I agree. Gotta say, though, I - I was worried you wouldn’t be able for patrol, y’know?”

You arch an eyebrow at him. “I know. I overheard you, remember?”

He blushes. “Aw, shit. Yeah. I’m sorry about that. I just didn’t want anything happening to you, what with your - condition, and all.”

You sigh softly, not really noticing the affection in his voice. “Most of the time, I’m fine. Y’know? I’m slower, but I do okay. I get tired more easily, but I manage. I didn’t come here to be a drain on the community.”

”You aren’t.”

”I know, but I want to keep it that way. I want to pull my weight. I’m able, Joel.”

He huffs in agreement. “Not like I’m a perfect specimen these days, either. Knees, fuckin’ back, deaf in one ear…”

You chuckle. “And you thought I wouldn’t manage patrol? Anyway, you’re not doing so bad, are you?”

He gives you a little smile, but that constant sadness still haunts his eyes. He stares at his coffee for a moment.

“You knew what you were doing, though.”

”I did. But I didn’t feel like I could stop.” You sip your tea, swallowing hard. “And I’m scared that makes me some kinda monster. You know?”

Oh, he knows. He knows it too well.

”You aren’t a monster.” Joel resists the urge to put an arm around you. “You just… something snapped, I guess. All that - well, all that hell you’ve gone through. It… it changes you. But it doesn’t make you a monster.”

He realises you’re crying before you do, spotting the fat tears that roll down your cheeks. He finds a clean handkerchief in his jeans and offers it to you.

Fuck it.

“Can I - can I put an arm round you? Just for some support?”

Your eyes light up, tears or no tears, and you nod enthusiastically. Joel is warm and comforting, his broad chest and strong arms a kind of anchor in the emotional storm. You nuzzle against him, and he gives you a little squeeze on the arm.

”You’re a really brave woman, you know that?”

His voice is quieter, more intentional. You look at him quizzically from under your lashes, unused to praise of this kind. For an instant you think about asking him what he means. But the safety you’ve found in the broad arm draped around you is all you need right now.

You nuzzle a little against his chest, and watch the fire dancing for the rest of the night.

#joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x disabled f!reader #joel miller x you #joel miller fanfiction #soft joel miller #disabled f!reader #disabled reader fic #hbo the last of us #the last of us fanfiction #pedro pascal character fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal #pedrostories

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martyfive · 3 months

Text

i lay in bed sick for two weeks straight. first there’s body temperature i never knew was possible for a human to have, then there are coughs that feel like they may be the last ones i could ever have in my life, then there’s weakness, then my five year old phone falls down from the bed ending up completely broken, then the bed sheets become something i couldn’t bear to see anymore. then i get up, go outside and unexpectedly find myself at the offer of a somewhat steady part job at this small italian restaurant we’ve been visiting every sunday sharp for the last year and a half except for these two weeks i spent lying sick in bed. we are leaving the bar for the night when R. asks me if i’d like to help her at the bar a couple hours a week.

“i have no experience or anything,” i say, feeling extremely daft. “i’m not even sure i can talk to people properly. i never really could.”

“it’s okay,” she says. “you’ll be polishing the glasses. it’s not hard. i’ll teach you everything.”

on our way home A. says, “it could be good for you, you know. being among people and trying something new,” and i feel like he’s right.

at this point this small restaurant already feels like another home i want to belong to. going there every sunday for so long totally helped with that. they have one of my works i gave them as a present for christmas on the wall. it hangs up above the table me and A. occupied the first time we ever came to eat there. the frame contains pages from a sketchbook i used to draw in while visiting italy five years ago. it feels too personal, but also somehow on it’s place. i hate to hoard the stuff i create. i want to be bolder.

regretting my life choices, i spend all what’s left from my last year’s salary on a new phone. it’s a first phone i bought without anyone’s help. it costs more than i deserve.

i can’t find any will to start drawing again after being sick for two weeks.

a couple days later i go to the restaurant to ask R. about the time i can get to work. she says, “this thursday, 6:30 pm,” and then adds, tugging on my star wars hoodie, “and put on a black shirt, if you have one”.

so i find one that looks like A. has been wearing it during his teenage years when he looked more like a stick than a human and i go for the job that for the first time in my life has nothing to do with any kind of art except the art of making cocktails i still keep messing up. a couple hours a week somehow soon turns into ten as normally as “polishing glasses” turns into “doing everything there is possible to do as quickly as possible”.

“would you like to do thirty hours a week?” R. asks one day looking hopeful as if i hadn’t broken ten of their glasses in the first five days of work.

“my back is gonna die sooner than you expect it to if i agree to that,” i answer. and it really is the only reason i don’t say yes.

i soon notice there is no time to think of anything else except the work to be done while i am behind the bar once again forgetting the difference between prosecco and chardonnay or picking the ice from the ice machine or freezing in the giant fridge while looking for the specific crate of beer everyone in this town drinks more often than water. the countless amount of crates are brought from and to the back room. the ten glasses are crushed, four of them in my own hands just from squeezing too hard on them. i cringe about every single one of them before falling asleep after coming home around midnight with my aching back and more money than i ever earned drawing pictures. i think about that one time my friend told me that once you start working in catering, there’s no way back. i haven’t talked to her in a while and i can’t ask her if she still thinks it’s true.

i still can’t draw. i guess it will pass. i still cough although i’m trying not to be loud when i’m behind the bar.

“you smoke?” R. asks. “i do. i just don’t have time.”

“i’ve been smoking since i was sixteen. but not anymore really,” i say to that. “when my mother calls me, then i smoke. but that doesn’t happen very often.”

M. laughs at that as if he understands what i’m talking about and says, “with this job, i either smoke a cigarette or kill somebody,” and i laugh with him.

M. is the chef and the restaurant is named after him. he cooks so good there is surely nothing better i’ve ever eaten in my entire life. i hear all about it from guests while picking the dishes from the tables, smiling and pretending my hands are not shaking. he and R. speak to each other in loud italian and i like how they sound even if i only understand a couple words from their dialogues.

“what’s allora?” i ask one time.

R. looks at me like i’m the only one who ever asked her a silly question like that, “huh,” she says, “i don’t know. it’s like here we go or something like that,” and she smiles.

i like talking to her. for some reason i like asking her questions and seeing the surprise on her face. she’s five years older than me but i feel like a child around her. she also has her birthday in november.

“all my family are scorpions,” she says after revealing the fact that there’s ten days between our birthdays. she names at least ten of the members of her family and all their november birthday dates in a row.

i say, “the parties must be hilarious when you all gather together.”

more often i feel like she’s my serious boss i keep disappointing with my every move but at the end of the shifts she turns into what feels more like a friend. i secretly hope i can be her friend one day even though it seems like she knows the name of every human being in this town and even some other nearby towns and doesn’t really need any more friends than she already has. but after all, i’m a part of this town now, too.

“what is your favourite thing to do here here at the bar?” i ask the other day.

she looks puzzled for a second, “maybe serving fish,” she says and this time it’s my turn to feel surprised. i saw how it’s done, and i don’t really know what she means.

“i thought it’s talking to people or something,” i say.

“nah,” she waves her hand, “it’s just my job, you know.”

i regret entering this territory but i still ask, “would you better like to do something else? some other job?”

“nah,” she says again, smiling, “i like it.”

and i like it too. horrifyingly, i like it too much. thinking about sitting at home and drawing stuff like i used to do all my life feels like a torture. it surely is one when i pick up my tablet and pencil and stare at the white canvas not knowing who i am anymore. there is nothing in my head i want to say. there is nothing my hands can do. i have no idea why. i want to go back behind the bar and ask R. what her favourite colour is.

“i’m proud of you,” A. says one night while we’re going back home from the restaurant where he got his two beers and one glass of whiskey i poured for him myself. he spent two hours sitting at the bar not far from these three teenage boys who have been drinking an enormous amount of beer and playing cards and then trying to guess where i come from according to my accent. “i’m proud that you’re doing good and you found something that you like so much.”

i buy two black shirts and jeans. i take my old black coat out of the wardrobe. i walk for two minutes from home to the bar and back looking fancier than ever. i feel happier than ever. i don’t look at my social media. i feel like this rotten sadness and loneliness that occupied my head for so long has nothing to do with my life now. i wonder if it’s just a phase. i consider finding a new therapist just to ask them if it’s okay to feel this good or i should be medicated before it’s too late. i want to go to bed at proper hour, wake up earlier, spend the day feeling good and then go to the bar and ask R. stupid questions and be stressed about the things i can control. i look at my workplace at home, at the white canvas that reflects nothingness in my head, at everything i have ever known, and i don’t know what to do.

i go back to work.

“you like it here?” M. asks almost every time. “is everything okay?”

“everything’s okay,” i say, smiling. and i mean it.

someone’s ordering an espresso at 11 pm. R. says, “tell them the coffee machine is already off,” turning it off while saying it. i laugh. i feel happy. i go home knowing there’s gonna be more work to be done tomorrow. i miss drawing stuff. i have nothing to say. i fall asleep thinking of the ten glasses i broke. in the morning, i can’t draw. i used to draw most of my stuff at the evenings and during the nights. now they are full of beer glasses and beer crates and adhd people who want an espresso before bed.

i ask myself if that really is how growing up feels like. i ask myself what i am going to do if i will not be able to draw a single piece of art ever again. i read the email of the person who wants me to draw an artwork for them. i wonder if they should know i’m an imposter who can’t draw anymore. i tell myself to shut up and stop being dramatic.

i go to work.

there’s a wedding at the restaurant. i once again bring what feels like an endless amount of bottle crates from the back room to the bar. i smile. i talk to people. i wipe the tables. i polish the glasses. i pour beer into them.

“my back hurts,” R. says.

“willkommen to the club,” i tell her, although for some reason my back doesn’t really hurt.

someone orders a beer and then changes their mind after the bottle was already opened.

“it’s yours if you want it,” R. says. “your shift is over anyway.”

and i stay. i sit at the bar as if i don’t really work there. i drink my beer, i talk to R. while she puts the new napkins on tables, makes sure everyone from the wedding paid what they had to and lets me ask her my questions. i pay for another beer, taking money from my fresh salary. R. rolls her eyes at that but allows me to pay anyway. she’s not a boss anymore. just… a friend. i tell her i don’t wanna go home.

“i can see that,” she laughs. “do you have friends here in town?” she asks.

i look at the bottom of my glass.

“no,” i say. there’s a lady on our street i sometimes walk our dogs together with. she’s as old as my mother. i always forget the names of her three kids although they’re all around my age. i wonder if i should mention her. “i have friends in other places. you know. not here.”

“i can be your friend here,” she says, smiling.

i feel like it’s the happiest day of my life. i’m also a little drunk on schwarzbier. even if my back would hurt i wouldn’t have noticed.

“if you need someone as me as a friend,” i say, “then. yeah. sure. uh. why not.”

we talk some more. the beer tests my language skills. i tell her i want a new tattoo. she says she got the first one when she was sixteen and it was a horrible butterfly.

“what is your favourite colour?” i finally ask.

she looks really baffled at that, then pulls out her phone. “i guess it’s red,” she says, showing me some of photos from her instagram where she’s younger than me now and is dressed up in red. “see, it looks good on me,” and she’s right. “but white is also good. and pink. and maybe purple. not black though. with my black hair, it doesn’t look good at all.”

we’re both dressed in black for work.

i come to the conclusion that colours are the least important thing in the world to her. that’s okay. i think about all the years i spent trying to make colours work. i wanna say something, but end up saying nothing.

she turns the lights off and locks the restaurant up. we spend a couple minutes walking in the same direction to our houses. i tell her about the name my friends from other places are calling me. i don’t tell her why it’s different from the one she saw on my id card. i’m not that drunk. she says she’s gonna use it from now on. she kisses my cheek before we part. i was at school the last time someone did that.

i go home. i sit at my workplace. i answer to the email of the person that wants me to draw an artwork for them from a new phone i spent enormous amount of money on. for a second i wonder if i should still tell them i’m an imposter and my career will be over by the morning when i wake up sober.

i think about the ten glasses i broke, then let myself forget about them. i tell myself to shut up and stop being dramatic.

i draw.

29/02/2024

#martyfive text #text post #text #diary

191 notes · View notes

mymoodwriting · 1 year

Photo

Request for Anon (Yandere Sugar Daddy NCT U) 9k, assault, verbal assault, physical assault, slut-shaming, public humiliation, bullying, name calling, smut, unprotected sex, fingering, penetration, blowjob, handjob, creampie, gang bang, breeding, pregnancy scare, forced pregnancy, non-con, kidnapping, yandere, bad ending, blatant disregard for womens reproductive rights

“Leave me the fuck alone!”

This wasn’t the first time you had answered the phone in such a manner. Screaming into the little speaker, hoping to blow out the eardrum of the annoying caller, and then hanging up. It was a very frustrating ordeal.

“Damn girl, what’s your problem?”

“It’s nothing, Mina. Just trying to get my point across.”

“Is someone bothering you?”

“Bingo.”

“Then why haven’t you blocked their number?”

“Oh I have, but obviously they still know mine. So whenever I get a call from a random number, I answer by screaming.”

“And how long have you been doing that for?”

“Uh… a little over a week now.”

“Seriously? And they still haven’t gotten the message?”

“Nope.”

“You know, what if those calls are important?”

“I don’t have any jobs or internships or anything that I’m waiting to hear back on, so it’s highly unlikely that’s the case.”

“Maybe you should change your number.”

“That would mean spending money I don’t have.”

“Really? Says the girl who has paid her tuition in full and doesn’t owe a penny in student debt. All because of some mystery job she won’t tell me about or share!”

“Well, you know me.”

“Yeah, I do.”

You and Mina were close friends, having met here at Uni your freshman year and sticking together through it all. Now you were at the start of your final semester, ready for one last ride before starting a new chapter of your life. Of course the campus was jammed back as new students were moving in, and freshmen were trying to navigate this new place and find their classes. It was a really beautiful day too, and you had yet to start any of your classes, so you were in a pretty good mood. You knew you probably wouldn’t feel the same by the end of the day, but it was best to make the most of it now. That is until you were suddenly yanked back, and came face to face with someone you really didn’t want to see.

“You’re such a fucken bitch.”

Jeno’s words dripped with venom. To say he was pissed would be an understatement. He was also the last person you wanted to see right now.

“What the hell are you doing here!”

“Why aren’t you answering our calls?”

“Oh, I am answering. I just don’t wanna hear what you have to say!”

“That’s not solely for you to decide!”

“Yes, it is. If I want to end things, I can, and I have.”

“Without a proper explanation? You’re kidding, right?”

“Does it sound like I am?”

“You’re being ridiculous.”

“Leave. Before I call security.”

“We are not leaving until we talk.”

“We?”

You heard it then, the terribly familiar sound of a car engine, two car engines to be specific. You looked over and saw the vehicles pulling up, two gentlemen exiting each one, and making their way over to you. In the moment you attempted to run off, but Jeno grabbed your arm and dragged you towards them.

“There she is.” Ten teased. “Where ya been hiding love?”

“Fuck off! I want nothing to do with you! Any of you!”

“Yeah, we got your text. Now explain yourself.”

“What’s there to explain? I’m breaking up with you, period.”

“See that’s the thing.” Johnny grabbed your chin and forced your eyes to meet. “Where did that silly idea come from?”

“My head. Or is that too hard to comprehend.”

“Easy now, princess. You’re begging for punishment if you keep acting like this.”

“I’m not playing any games here.” You pulled away from Johnny. “We’re done, now leave.”

“That’s hardly an explanation.” Jaehyun hissed. “Do the last four years mean nothing to you?”

“Are you really all that dumb? Our relationship was just an exchange of goods and services, nothing more.”

“Is that so?”

“I’ve told you all about my dreams and aspirations for the future before. When did I ever include you in them?”

Yuta scoffed. “So you really just whored yourself out to us for four years so we could pay your tuition? And now that it’s all been paid off, you’re done with us?”

“Bingo. Maybe you’re not that stupid.”

“This was all just a fucken game to you?” Jeno yelled. “Four years?! A fucken game!”

“Not like you ever made a serious move, did you now? Any of you for that matter. So don’t come bitching to me about a broken heart or broken promises. It’s not my fault you caught feelings when I wasn’t sending you any fucken signals.”

“Yeah? What about all the nights out? The dinners, the trips, the clothes and accessories?”

“Dinners, and trips, you invited me out on. I never asked to go anywhere. As for the clothes and other stuff, that’s all at your place, isn’t it? I never kept any of the fancy expensive stuff you got me, did I? Nor did I ask for anything. I owe you nothing. You got what you paid for, more than that actually, but I’m fine leaving things as they are.”

Your words had certainly stunned them into silence. And you also meant everything you said. It was certainly fun to be with them, to get a little slice of that kinda life, even if it was just for a while. You knew it wouldn’t last though, and that’s the mentality you kept, the one that kept you from falling for them. They were just rich guys wanting someone to mess around with, and now that their no-strings attached fuck buddy had left them, they were panicking. You said your peace, having to spell it all out for them. It was good to get it off your chest though, and with that you’d make you exit. Or at least that was the idea.

As you turned around to leave, you felt a hand grab your arm and yank you back with enough force to drop you to the ground. You couldn’t get back up as they surrounded you. By then your whole argument had been noticed and a crowd of students and faculty had gathered around. Having this conversation out in the open was already embarrassing, and all the attention was making it worse. Although they were about to increase that exponentially.

“Whore.” Jaehyun spat. “Any money spent on you was clearly a waste. The only way you could think about getting through uni was to spread your legs. I bet you slept around with your professors too.”

“Excuse me!”

“Do you even have any brains?” Yuta questioned. “Or are you just playing pretend so you can wear a cap and gown, and show off some piece of paper.”

“Fucken-”

You tried to get up but Jeno got his foot on your chest, pinning you down. You struggled to get him off, but he was putting all his weight on you. When your eyes met him you could see he was still pissed, and if possible, he was way more enraged now.

“You found someone else to spread your legs for, didn’t you!” Jeno yelled. “Whoring yourself out for whoever can benefit you the most!”

“Get off of me!”

“Why? Don’t you like having men on top of you?” Johnny kicked dirt at you. “Fucken slut.”

“Ya!”

“Just do what you do best.”

Yuta and Ten started yanking your legs apart, and you kicked and screamed at them. Although you stopped when Jeno put more weight on you and you struggled to breath. You were clawing at his leg, but he was relentless.

“What’s going on here!”

Two officers from campus security approached and all the boys stepped back. Jeno moved away and you took in a deep breath, sitting up and coughing a bit.

“We’re leaving.” Ten smiled. “No need for an escort.”

“Hold on now, you can’t-”

“Just let them go.” You spoke. “I’m not gonna make a big deal out of this.”

The officers didn’t do anything more, and so the boys walked off. Soon enough you heard those damn engines again, but you didn’t dare look over at them. For a moment after they were gone everything remained quiet and still, and then Mina came over to help you stand, the crowds starting to disperse.

“What the hell was all that?”

“Remember when I told you I got a sugar daddy…”

“Yeah, daddy, as in one, not five! Also, I didn’t believe you.”

“Well I wasn’t lying.”

“Clearly. And you couldn’t share any of them?”

“They’re not exactly easy to deal with.”

“Is that why you’d always ditch me? Disappear on weekends? Why we couldn’t ever really share a meal together? You were off with them.”

“Yeah…”

“You really are stupid.”

“Ya!”

“Girl, when did you ever have time for yourself? Or anyone else in your life who was actually important? Here I thought you were just so focused on studying and busy working to pay off your tuition. I wasn’t wrong on the latter, but still.”

“Are you... mad at me?”

“No, not really. Just processing out loud... you did tell me about this, somewhat, I just didn’t think you were for real.”

“I know. If you had told me the same thing I wouldn’t have believed you either.”

“But you’re really done with them now?”

“Yup. I didn’t think they’d throw such a fit though.”

“A fit? I’d call that harassment, and assault. Shouldn’t you press charges?”

“There’s no point. They’d get good lawyers, and it’d just be a waste of my time. I don’t want anything to do with them anymore, so I’ll let it go.”

“Fine, but you are getting a new number after class. Got it?”

“Yeah.”

That morning certainly killed the mood, but you went about your day trying to make the best of it. Of course your chest hurt pretty bad, but nothing some quick pain killers couldn’t deal with. Like you had promised, after all your classes, you and Mina went to change your number. Then you went about the grueling task of messaging friends and family to let them know you had a new number.

“Shall we go out for ice cream? You know, since you’re free now.”

“I could use something sweet.”

You knew there would still be issues. If they made such a big show at your campus, who knows what else would happen if you met out on the streets. With that in mind you didn’t go anywhere off campus alone, and you didn’t visit any of their favorite places or usual hangouts. You thought you had it figured out, but there was something you couldn’t avoid. Everyone else.

Word spread fast about that day. About how a girl got harassed by five guys, and all the slurs and insults that they threw her way. A few days later everyone seemed to know your name, and had an idea of the type of person you were. When you went to class all the others would purposely sit away from you, only Mina ever sat next to you. Then there were the whispers and chuckles. Every time you raised your hand to ask a question there was always some comment about you sleeping around with the professor. Regardless of who it was. It was frustrating, but you just pushed through. Although Mina certainly wanted to pick a fight with everyone.

“Just let it go.”

“How are you so okay with this?”

“I’m not, but it’ll die down eventually. As long as I don’t engage with them I won’t add fuel to the fire. So don’t pay them any attention.”

“They are slut-shaming you and saying all kinds of shit.”

“And I just have to make it through this semester. After that I can move forward and really build my life. I’m not gonna let some idiots who have nothing better to do ruin that. Besides, I’m sure they’re all just jealous I could actually get a Sugar Daddy, and five at that.”

“You’re not wrong there. Those people don’t just throw money at anyone.”

“I appreciate you ready to fight for me, but this ain’t worth it.”

Mina sighed. “Fine, but if you ever wanna start swinging, just let me know.”

“Will do.”

🖤

You were right, in part. The teasing did die down, and you could go about your life like normal, but there were still a handful of dicks who found things funny. And one ballsy little fucker who decided to go a step further. As one of your classes ended, and you were gathering your things, another of your peers accidentally spilled their drink all over you.

“Oh shit, my bad. You must be used to getting soaked though.”

That bastard and his friends snickered to themselves. You knew everyone got the joke, some chuckling too, but of course no one was gonna say anything or take your side. So you just did your best to clean your face, and then whipped around to look at your attacker. Of course it was a boy and his friends, although he got quiet now that you were staring at him dead on.

“Your mistake, right?”

“Yeah. I can be clumsy, you know.”

“Right. So then just pay up and we can call it even.”

“Huh?”

“You said it was your mistake. So pay for it.” You held out your hand. “I think a hundred dollars should cover my hair and clothes.”

“A hundred dollars? You play around with some rich boys and now you think you’re worth all that?”

“So you’re not gonna pay me?”

“Fuck that.”

“Fine then, but we are gonna call it even.”

“What?”

Without missing a beat you swung at him and clocked him right in the face. He fell back onto his friends, and you noticed a bit of blood from his nose.

“My mistake. I guess we’re even now.”

“You bitch!”

Not once in your academic career have you ever wound up in the principal’s office, this was the student dean’s office, so not the same but still. You had no problems with words, but things getting physical was crossing a line, and you weren’t going to sit still. You were still drying off as you sat in the dean’s office, listening to that jerk go off about how you were a monster and whatever. You weren’t going to apologize until he did, but that was definitely not gonna happen when his parents walked in. You couldn’t believe he actually called for help like this, and now they were demanding your expulsion. That someone violent like you shouldn’t be at such a place.

“Are you kidding? Are you even looking at me? Your son started this, and couldn’t apologize or pay up for his mistake!”

“A mistake isn’t met with physical violence!”

“He started it!”

“Please, everyone calm down.” The dean spoke. “We can resolve this without yelling.”

“I want that girl expelled.”

“That seems a little too-”

“Do you know how much we give to this school so-”

The conversation stopped short as the door opened. You couldn’t imagine who else would join this conversation. When you looked back your eyes went wide, and you stood up.

“Sit down, baby.” Johnny said. “We’ll get you cleaned up later.”

“How-”

“Who the hell are you gentlemen?!”

“Y/n’s sponsors.” Jaehyun smiled. “We heard there was a commotion involving her, and by the state she is in, I’m not very happy. What is being done to remedy this?”

“She hasn’t apologized for hitting my son!”

“Has he apologized for his actions?”

“Exactly who are you to be making such demands?”

“Ah, right. I’ve not introduced myself. I’m Jung Jaehyun. These are my friends, Nakamoto Yuta, Johnny Suh, Lee-”

“I know those names…”

“Good. Then apologize before you’re buried.”

“Excu-”

“Or shall this be resolved outside this room?” Ten smiled. “I have no problem doing it that way too. I might actually prefer it.”

You didn’t care much for an apology, you got to punch the fucker in the face, but getting one was the cherry on top. You didn’t apologize either and the situation was left at that. Now that you had a moment you wanted to go clean up, and the boys wound up dragging you into a gender neutral bathroom. Johnny locked the door, and leaned against it, guaranteeing privacy. You were ready to start screaming and fighting but Yuta turned the sink on, getting the water warm and grabbing paper towels. They weren’t saying anything, and you could silently be grateful for that. You washed up your hair, using the hand dryer to dry it off as best you could. Jeno gave you his jacket afterwards since your shirt was still dirty.

“Alright, what the fuck do you want?”

“We owe you an apology.” Yuta said. “For everything.”

“Go on then.”

“We’re sorry we attacked you the way we did that day.” Jeno began. “We were out of line and completely in the wrong for that.”

“Assholes. You know this is all your fault right? Everyone keeps calling me names because of you! And this was the first time someone dared to take it a step further.”

“We never meant-”

“Then what did you think was gonna happen when you screamed out that I was a whore in the middle of campus?”

“…”

“Good try, I guess.”

“You were right.” Ten admitted. “Four years is a lot of time, and yet throughout it all you never made a move to suggest you wanted anything more from us than attention and money. We never did anything to give you the impression that we wanted more from you either. I’m sure if we had, you would have said something sooner. So you were right, we had no reason to act the way we did. We’ve been seeing each other for a long time and you broke it off so suddenly. Our judgment became clouded, and we let rage overtake us when we should have been better. We can’t simply undo what we did, but we are sincerely sorry for our actions.”

“Hm… was it really that hard to take a moment and reflect?”

“Yeah…” Jaehyun added. “We’ve had such good times together, it was hard to believe you’d just leave us like that… but why was it so sudden? Why didn’t you just talk to us?”

“I… I wasn’t entirely sure how… we weren’t really boyfriend and girlfriend… and it’s not like we had agreed to anything specifically when we started this whole… thing… all I could think of was a break up text… I also didn’t think you’d explode at me the way you did… I mean, I always thought you had girls lined up that you played with or whatever… I didn’t think you’d care that much…”

“Well, as you can see… we care a lot…”

“Yeah… how did you even know I was in trouble?”

“We might have… been paying someone in the administrative office to keep tabs on you for us…”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah.” Johnny commented. “We’ve practically been with you throughout your whole academic career. You’re a good student, so we never imagined you’d get into any kind of trouble, but just to be safe. It worked out for us in the end. We’ve been wanting to talk to you, to apologize, we just didn’t really know how to approach you.”

“I see.”

“Which brings us to our other point. Do you think we can do this properly?”

“Do what?”

“We understand that you don’t see us in your future, but can we at least end things on a good note? We’ve been with you for four years now… we were all kinda hoping to see you graduate you know…”

“What exactly are you suggesting here?”

“One last dinner… one last trip…” Yuta mumbled. “That kinda stuff… let us see this to the end. We can just be another part of your Uni days and nothing more.”

“Hm…”

“Can you at least give us that kinda closure?”

You weren’t really sure how you felt about all this. You had already cut them out of your life, but they were clearly still hanging on. At least they had apologized, and did help you back there in the dean’s office. Truth was the way you handled things wasn’t all that great either. You had been worried that if you just talked to them they’d find some way to convince you to stick around, but that really wasn’t your life plan. Now they understood that, so maybe things could end differently. You also didn’t want to part ways with them on a bad note.

“Just until graduation?”

“We really wanna see you with that cap and gown.” Jeno admitted. “You’ll look so gorgeous.”

“Alright, we can somewhat continue as we were, but after my graduation, we’re done. Understood?”

“Got it.”

“Can we take you out to lunch then?” Ten asked. “Since you’re done with classes for the day.”

“You know my schedule too?”

“We were trying to figure out a way to talk to you…”

“Fine, let me just go change clothes first. I’ll meet you at my usual pick up spot?”

“That works for us.”

🖤

It had been a while since you last hung out with the boys, so there was a bit of awkwardness. At least this was just lunch to ease back into things. They took you to one of their usual spots, getting a private room and ordering your favorites.

“So, you really just clocked him in the face, huh?”

“He could have paid up. I wasn’t going to let him do that without consequence.”

“Good on you.” Yuta cheered. “Although tryna get you kicked out, that’s ridiculous.”

“I can’t believe he called his parents. Such a momma’s boy.”

“Says the sugar baby.”

“I didn’t call you to come save my ass.”

“Ah, so you agree.” Johnny teased. “We did save you?”

“Well… I wasn’t entirely sure how I was gonna deal with that just yet…”

“We saved you. It’s okay to admit that.”

“You guys just wanna brag to my face.”

“Is that so wrong?” Jeno teased. “Maybe you can shut me up with a reward.”

“You think you deserve a reward?”

“Don’t I?”

“Hm… what did you have in mind?”

“I have been missing you a lot.”

“Really? You? Or is it someone else?”

“Huh?”

Jeno had been at your side, and he was leaning in close asking for his reward. Now that you were teasing him back you leaned in too. You placed a hand between his legs, slowly moving it closer to his crotch. After breaking the ice, it was kinda easy to slip back into old dynamics. Besides, maybe you had missed something about them too.

“Oh… you want a reward out of this too, huh?”

“I’ve been good, haven’t I?”

“Easy now.” Jaehyun pulled you away from Jeno. “We’re just having lunch today, baby. Besides, are you still taking the pills?”

You sighed. “I stopped taking them when we parted ways.”

“Then we should probably get you back on them before we start playing. Don’t you think?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“We still have some.” Ten offered. “They should work just fine, right?”

“It shouldn’t be a problem.”

“Excellent. I’ll throw in a pregnancy test or two, just to be safe.”

“Seriously?”

“Well, you took a break from the pill, just a precaution.”

“Fair.”

Things weren’t exactly like before. They were more respectful of your time. Before they’d always be calling, wanting every moment of free time you had. They’d pick you up Friday night from school, keep you to themselves all weekend most of the time. You only ever got a pass during exam time, and when you had the guts to ask for a break. Usually you didn’t, not wanting to upset them and possibly lose out on your tuition money. It was exhausting, but it was all for a better life. At least that’s what you told yourself. This time around they were more like friends, checking in on you, and asking how you were doing.

They definitely wanted to see you, but on your own terms. So occasionally you’d go out for lunch, maybe dinner, but nothing too extravagant, as you knew they were gonna go all out for the last trip and dinner. At least with these little outings they always brought you back to campus unlike before where you’d spent the night with them until Sunday afternoon. Things were better this way, kinda making you wish the last four years had been like this too. Although you were actually surprised when they brought up the last trip.

“Spring break?”

“Yeah. Let’s have a blast and unwind before you give it your all for graduation.”

“Uh… well… the thing is…”

“You don’t like it?” Johnny questioned.

“I had already made plans with my friends for spring break… and I thought you’d want to go out on a trip like after my finals…”

“Ah, right. You didn’t intend for us to still be in your life by now.”

“Then how about we split it.” Yuta suggested. “First half of your break, you hang out with your friends. For the second half, we get you all to ourselves.”

“Hm… switch it.”

“Huh?”

“You get the first half, my friends get the second half.”

“How come?”

“Cause you guys can switch your plans around easily, my friends can’t.”

“Fair. So we’ll pick you up Monday morning?” Jeno asked. “Or can we come get you Friday night?”

“Oh, wanna kick things off early?”

“If you can handle it.”

“Sure. I’ll pack some things after my class.”

“Can’t wait.”

Even if you were acting cool, you were excited for this trip. They always treated you so well, spoiled you like a princess. This wasn’t gonna be any different. They had been modest so far, but now was their chance to do things like back then. They picked you up in a party bus, starting off strong with drinks, and congratulating you on your midterm exams. Of course karaoke and good food followed, and you were out celebrating until early hours of the morning. Somehow you all made it back to the penthouse sweet. You had a few more drinks before you made it to bed, half dressed with the boys piled around you.

The morning was a hangover times six, although some of them had it worse than you. Thankfully breakfast was brought up, and hangover cures, so you just had to get up and put food in your mouth. When that failed Johnny was more than happy to feed you, the one of the bunch that could really handle their liquor. You also needed to get yourself together. The party had only just begun, not to mention all the plans you had with your friends later on in the week. For now though, you just needed to make it through breakfast.

“Had a little too much?”

“I’m good…”

“Your face says otherwise.”

“What’s it telling you?”

“You wanna throw up?”

“I don’t want a bad taste in my mouth.”

“Then some ice cream to help soothe your throat.”

“Ice cream for breakfast?” Jaehyun questioned. “Isn’t that a bad idea?”

“This week is all about bad ideas.”

“So what’s on the agenda for today?” You asked. “More drinks?”

“We want you sober for all the memories we are gonna make. So no more drinks, is that okay?”

“Just fine.”

“Good. We were thinking of some tourist attractions, and some trips to the museums.”

“Jellyfish!”

“Yes. The aquarium is on the list.”

“Awesome!”

Once you were all better you headed out, taking a limo into town. You had a chance to relax now that you were on break, and really take it all in. This was one of the last times you’d be around here, planning to go home after graduation. The whole day honestly made you feel like a child, indulging in everything you wanted to do or eat. To many you looked like a little sister with her brothers, or maybe just a lucky girl with her friends, but either way, you were glad you didn’t attract any negative attention. Some did recognize the boys, but that never became a problem, so you had nothing to worry about.

You got to have lunch in the aquarium, watching all the fishes swim, almost feeling like you were in the water with them. The penguins were great too, and the jellyfish, and dolphins. You totally walked out with two or three plushies. For dinner this time you returned to the hotel, having some quality food, but as said before no drinking. Jeno and Yuta still felt the need to embarrass you and make a toast to your health and success in school. They even had a dessert brought out with a candle to once again congratulate you on surviving midterms. Although once back in the suite you better understood why there was a drinking ban.

As soon as you set foot in the penthouse Johnny picked you up in his arms, taking you to the bedroom. He saw you down and laid you back, his hand caressing your cheek. You could feel one of the others getting your shoes off, and you knew where this was going. It had been a while, but you had been waiting for this. Besides all the attention and money, there was another benefit to having five sugar daddies. No one could ever take care of you the way you did. Johnny leaned down to kiss your lips, his hands reaching down to your shirt, although you stopped him.

“I don’t think you asked permission.”

“I’m not asking tonight, baby.”

“No?”

“You have any idea how bad you’ve been?”

“Me?”

“Breaking up with us.” Jeno hissed into your ear. “Hiding away and trying to leave.”

“I thought we-”

“Sh, unless you wanna cause more trouble.”

“Tonight you’re gonna give us everything we are owed.” Yuta added. “So you better take it all with a smile on your face.”

Suddenly Johnny had your hands pinned above your head as Jeno pulled up your shirt. He reached over to unhook your bra and push it up, exposing your breasts. He kneaded them for a moment and you bit your lip. His hands were cold, but he knew how you liked his touch. Then you felt hands getting you out of your skirt. The second your panties were exposed there was a hand grabbing your crotch.

“It did always hurt that you never invited us back to your dorm.” Ten commented. “Didn’t want you getting exposed to your roommate?”

“She knew… about our arrangement… sort of…”

“I didn’t say you could speak, baby.” Ten slapped your inner thigh. “Bad girl.”

You bit your lip, instinctively trying to close your legs but Ten pulled them apart. The boys stripped you out of your clothes, leaving your panties on for the time being. Jaehyun had taken to holding down your arms as Johnny started kissing down your chest, Ten’s hand squeezing your thighs. Yuta and Jeno were already shedding articles of clothing, getting you all the more excited.

“You’ve been a good girl and taking the pills we gave you, right?” Jaehyun asked, and you nodded. “Good. So we can have all kinds of fun tonight.”

For as long as you had been with them, you had always taken the pill. They didn’t always take you raw, but it was better to be safe than sorry. You were also glad they didn’t play around with that kinda thing, wanting to be safe with you even if they were gonna fill you up to the brim with their seed. Tonight was going to be no different, you figured they’d be desperate to do so. Even if they wanted to tease, they couldn’t help themselves for too long. Soon enough you were all naked, and you were getting attacked with kisses from all angles.

“Who’s first?”

“The eldest.”

They still cared to make sure you were nice and wet, Johnny stretching you out a good way before giving you everything. It had been so long for you too, abstaining from sex to focus on your studies. You also hadn’t slept with anyone else but them for four years, and weren’t entirely sure how to get laid anymore. Even if it hurt at first, your body was quick to remember this familiar stretch, and feeling. Johnny hadn’t forgotten your body though, doing everything just right, doing it just how you liked it. Not to mention the others knew what to do while waiting their turn. Playing with your tits, stealing kisses, rubbing your clit, using your hands or mouth to warm up. You were gonna wear yourself out long before them, and they really loved when you became putty in their hands.

Even with all the distractions you couldn’t ignore Johnny as he was the one pounding into you. He was always so rough and precise with his movements, hitting your sweet spot just right. Of course you had been getting yourself off in your dorm, but nothing could compare to one of them taking you over to the edge. You could tell when Johnny got close, he got sloppy and so desperate, trying to hold out to make it all last, but spilling inside you was just as rewarding. The warm feeling between your legs was already making you head spin, but you knew Johnny lost a bit of his touch if he didn’t get you off. He wanted another go, but Jaehyun was already shoving him out of the way.

His turn was spent and Jaehyun would take pride in finishing you off. He had no problem slipping into the mess that was becoming of your cunt, eager to add to the mix. Of course Johnny wanted to give you a taste too, having you use your tongue to clean him up. If you had taken him all at once you probably would have choked as Jaehyun was giving you everything. He was making it very obvious he had a lot of pent up frustrations he was taking out on you. If he made you feel this good, you wouldn’t mind him holding off more often. Although he wasn’t gonna get the satisfaction of making you cum either as Jeno started playing with your clit, pushing you over to the edge before Jaehyun was even close.

You squeezed Jaehyun tight, feeling as you were leaking out cum, your head thrown back as your mouth hung open in bliss. You vaguely heard Jaehyun scolding the other boy for taking what was his, but it wasn’t so bad if he got to fuck you while you were so sensitive. He moved with your climax, trying to keep you riding that high for as long as you could, but as you started to come down he got relentless. You couldn’t help but whimper, but that wasn’t gonna make him go any easy. In his own desperation he got close, unable to hold back before cumming inside you, making you overflow.

“Such a messy slut, taking two cocks so well.”

“Let’s make it three.”

Jeno wanted to go next, but Ten kicked him off. He stuck two fingers into your mess, swearing cum on your belly, and then sticking the digits in your mouth.

“How’s that taste?”

He swirled his fingers around before pulling them out with a pop. He could be real mean, playing with you when he wasn’t even filling you up. Your whimpers were adorable to him, especially when you got needy enough to start shaking your hips. Now you were begging, and he was happy to give you what you wanted.

“Whore.”

Hearing those words outside the bedroom certainly wasn’t fun, but in the bedroom, even if it was said with the same level of vileness, you’d happily accept it. Four years, the same five dicks, you were certainly a whore for them. Ten was certainly on the more elegant side, working you over along with him, knowing how to get you on his level so you’d both climax together. Even being a little out of practice with your body, he could still play you like an instrument. He always held your hands when he had his way with you, wanting more than just your cunt to squeeze him tight, he wanted to feel the rest of your body shake. You’ve left him with marks before, and he’d happily welcome them now.

“At a girl, still know who owns you.”

You swear you saw white when he made you cum, drool slipping down your face. It was only your second orgasm, but you knew they could get more out of you. As many as they pleased. There was a safe word in place, but in all the years you had known them, you never used it. They seemed to know your limits as well as you did. Before you could even properly come down Jeno was already kissing at your chest, sucking on your nipples as he edged himself inside. The noise that was heard as he pushed aside everyone else’s seed to get in, an all too familiar sound you did quite enjoy to hear.

“You’re already so full, baby, can you take more?”

“Yes…”

“That’s what I like to hear.”

These sheets were gonna need to be thrown out when you were all done. You were already creating such a mess, and it wasn’t much compared to other nights. At least not yet. Jeno was practically digging into you, pushing in as cum came out. They had all had their turns before, being first or last or in the middle, so they wouldn’t complain about what stage they got to you. There were five of them after all, so they had to be good about sharing. Jeno was eager to make you unwind, so he gave you plenty of attention elsewhere. Twirling around your clit with his fingers, seeing it get red and swollen, another hand on your hip, keeping you from escaping him. He did it well enough you came first, already so sensitive, and he soon followed.

You felt so fucken full you swear you were gonna burst, but you were just out of practice. Yuta peppered you with kisses, telling you how well you were doing. His fingers dipped into your sloppy cunt, having you get a taste of it. You certainly didn’t expect him to kiss you after, but they didn’t just play around with you. They had each other after all. You were already so overstimulated and lost, Yuta was kind enough to give you a little break before taking what was rightfully his. He had no problem playing around with your cunt for a while before dipping into the mess. He fit in nicely, having a pretty good idea how to keep you happy despite your state. He was ruthless, just as frustrated as Jaehyun, taking it all out on you and sparking you back to life. You really missed them.

Now either the orgasm or Yuta made you pass out, but either way, you blacked out for a while. When you came to you were lying on the floor with your legs up in the air, clearly having fallen off to the side of the bed. Although Jeno was happily sleeping on your tummy, sighing dreamily and clearly cozy. You giggled at the sight. Sometimes you really did forget they were all close to your age, and yet living such different lives. You let Jeno stay for a while before you realized this position was very uncomfortable. You poked Jeno’s face to make him open his eyes.

“Why didn’t you pick me up? Do you think this is comfortable?”

“You looked cute, almost like you were drunk.”

“But I’m not.”

“Well, maybe not drunk off alcohol.” Jeno giggled and got up. “We were all out of it.”

“Obviously.”

You got up, sitting down properly, well aware that you were leaking cum all over the floor, but that wasn’t for you to worry about now. Some of the others were lying in bed, and you crawled up to join them, pressing lazy kisses to exposed skin. This was all a little break for everyone. The night was still young, and even if you were four orgasms in, it was just one for each of them. They were greedy, and would certainly get what they wanted out of you, whether you were conscious or not. Waking up with a cock inside you wasn’t new, but certainly something you could picture for a night like this.

🖤

You didn’t actually wake up properly until the afternoon. After that you knew the next day would be nothing but a lazy day. Somehow you managed to get up and get into the shower, knowing you needed a deep clean. Although you dozed off until Yuta found you sitting in the tub. He had the energy to join you and help clean you up, which you were grateful for. You returned the favor as well, the two of you the first to eat lunch from room service, waiting around for the others. When you were well enough you stepped out of the penthouse so they could clean up, heading to a park to enjoy the weather and sun.

The rest of your little trip was like that. You had some more fun at night, but not too much. Besides, you’d be going off with your friends, and you didn’t need to be completely worn out. Overall it was a good trip, a good last trip, one you knew you’d never forget. When the time came they dropped you off back at Uni, wishing you well with your friends, asking you to let them know if you needed anything. You thanked them for the adventure, glad you could still have all that. It felt more authentic given that this was really you going out with them as friends, not getting paid for your company.

Of course at some point your friends had to ask about your little trip. Anyone who knew you now knew about your sugar daddies, so there was no point lying about it. You spilled what you were comfortable with, and just enjoyed your time with them. You couldn’t believe this was your last spring break, but you were so happy to have them with you. It was hard to fall asleep Sunday night, knowing what awaited you the next day, but you had enough good memories to get you through the door. So come Monday morning, you weren’t actually dead as you got to class, unlike most of your peers.

The professors weren’t all going to be kind, so it was back to work like before. This was the final stretch for you, focus and study hard, and you’d be graduating. A part of you couldn’t actually believe it, but you had to, you couldn’t fuck this up. So you put a lot off to the side, including the boys. You still texted them, but you couldn’t do any mini dates, and they were very understanding. Even if you were the one working your butt off, they were just as nervous and as excited as you were. Although all that focus distracted you from something that was just as important.

“Holy shit, I’m late.”

“What?”

“I was due like last week. Fuck.”

“Aren’t you on the pill?”

“That’s not foolproof.”

“Fair. Are you sure it isn’t stress though? I’m pretty sure I’ve missed a period or two cause of classes.”

“I don’t think I have before…”

“Well you are gonna graduate in a month. That is if you pass your finals.”

“Don’t fucken jynx it!”

“I’m just saying. You’ve probably never been stressed like this before. Athletes wind up not having a period for months cause of the stress they’re under.”

“I’m not a professional athlete.”

“Then go buy a pregnancy test and see if one of your sugar daddies is gonna be a father.”

“I wouldn’t fucken tell them. We’ve always been careful.”

“Then it’s just the stress. Problem solved. Also, don’t you have class soon?”

“Fuck. I do. I’ll get a pregnancy test later.”

“Cool, see you later.”

You really didn’t think you’d be pregnant. You were careful, for the last four years, and you were very sexually active. Mina had a point though, you were under a lot of stress with graduation, but you had to be sure. Thankfully instead of buying one you remember the boys had given you some when they got you the pills. After classes you returned and used one of the tests, relieved to see it came out negative. So it really was just stress, and you were quite amazed it could do that to your body. Regardless, that was one less thing to worry about.

To a degree you did feel bad you couldn’t see the boys after spring break, it had been quite a trip considering it was the last, but your academics were important. They wished you luck with finals, and you were ready for the last major exams of your life. You waited anxiously for the results, overjoyed that you had passed, and you were going to graduate. You had to celebrate, doing so with your friends. It was only once things wound down that you called the boys wanting to share the news.

“So, how did it go?”

“I passed… I’m graduating!”

“I knew you could do it.” Jeno cheered. “Our baby is so smart.”

“We’ve got to celebrate.” Johnny added. “Shall we pick you up?”

“I’ve already been partying, and I’m kinda spent. Maybe tomorrow?”

“Nah, it’s okay, you should rest. Don’t drink so much, okay.”

“I haven’t had a drink, can’t risk becoming a drunk mess before I take the stage.”

“Can we take you shopping!” Yuta asked. “Get you a nice dress for graduation?”

“I’d love that actually. Perhaps the one thing you guys can get me that I’ll keep.”

“If we don’t rip it off you.”

“True. Tomorrow then, shopping day.”

“We can’t wait.”

Shopping wasn’t something to make a big deal out of, but how could you all not be excited. You’d be walking across the stage in the outfit you bought today, it had to be perfect. Not to mention the five guys buying it might wanna destroy it later, so you had to get good pictures first.

“We were thinking, after the ceremony, we’d take you out to dinner.”

“The last dinner.”

“Of course.” Ten smiled. “If that’s okay.”

“Yeah. It seems like a fitting end for us.”

“You better not cry.”

“I won’t.”

“Hm, guess we’ll see about that.”

The big day brought on a lot of nerves, you could barely sleep the night before. Although when the sun was up, you and Mina were already getting dolled up, and she loved your outfit.

“You look hot.”

“Thanks.”

“So you really can’t come with me for dinner.”

“I already promised the boys. It’s the last one. Besides, I wanna see what kind of graduation present they get me.”

“Oh, they’ll probably give you a lot of money. Maybe a house.”

“That’d be awesome.”

“You better tell me immediately.”

“I’m sure I won’t be able to keep it a secret from you, so don’t worry.”

Even if you looked stunning, it was mostly hidden by the gown. Still, you looked incredible and you couldn’t believe you had made it to the end. When you headed to the ceremony you looked around taking it all in. Even if you wanted your family there, you knew things had come up so they couldn’t attend. It’s why you were so happy to see the boys, knowing they were there for you. Although they did embarrass you a bit, Jeno and Yuta having a big congratulations sign, the others swinging around noise makers. Of course it dragged to wait for your name, but when it was your turn up on the stage you had the biggest smile, finding the boys in the crowd to show off too.

You had tears in your eyes, so happy that all your efforts hadn’t been in vain. The boys had made their way over to you, embracing you in their arms, congratulating you over and over again. They said your tears were cute, but they were very proud of you. They even had flowers and a graduation bear as a present for you. They wanted pictures too, so you did your best to get rid of the tears and fix your makeup. After celebrating with your other friends and seeing the ceremony to the end you headed off to eat. You weren’t really hungry from all the adrenaline, but it was your last meal with the guys, and a very important one at that.

“You looked so beautiful up there.” Johnny complimented. “Congratulations.”

“Thank you. I’m glad you could be there.”

“Us too.”

“So, what did you get me?”

“After you eat.” Ten said. “So be a good girl and have your fill.”

“I’ll burn a hole in your wallet tonight. Just watch.”

“I’d love to see you try.”

There was something so peaceful about this meal, and exciting. They all asked about your plans going forward, what you wanted to do. Of course this was where you’d part ways, but you knew there was always a chance you’d run into each other again. Despite all the good things, you couldn’t help but wonder what your present was. After dessert they finally presented you with a little box. Now your heart was racing. It could be a key to a car or house, or maybe a card to a bank account they had made you. Still, you thanked them all and opened the box. Your smile faltered as you stared at the contents, dumbfounded.

“It’s… it’s a pregnancy test…”

“Surprise!”

“I… I don’t understand…”

“Well, you always talked about your future.” Jaehyun explained. “And how we weren’t a part of that. It really hurt, but you were right. So we figured we should include ourselves in your future.”

“I’m not… following…”

“You’re late, aren’t you?”

“Yes, but I took a pregnancy test already. It came out negative. The stress-”

“The one I gave you was fake.” Ten said. “It’s meant to come out negative.”

“What… what are you…”

“The best way to become a part of your future is for you to have our kid.” Yuta stated. “Of course we’re probably not gonna know which of us is the biological father, unless you had like quintuplets, but we can raise it together.”

“What…”

“Of course we’ll cover all the expenses.” Johnny assured. “So you don’t have to worry about food, or a roof over your head, nothing. We’re gonna be a big happy family now.”

“You’re… you’re lying… you… I’m on the pill!”

“Those were also fake.” Jeno added. “A placebo thing, right? Like sugar.”

“You planned this!”

“How else were we gonna be part of your future?”

“Truth is we always imagined a future with you.” Ten admitted. “After about a year, we realized how great you were, how perfect you were for us. So when you suddenly broke it off, we couldn’t believe it, but you were also right. We never really let you know we wanted you, so that’s on us, but we’ve rectified that now.”

“You’re fucken lying!” You stood up. “You did not get me fucken pregnant!”

“Shall we go confirm that?”

You were furious, and you hated that they were throwing this idea out so casually. You took the pregnancy test and stormed off to the bathroom. They had rented out the whole restaurant, so you didn’t have to worry about anyone else. You nervously used the test, scared to look at the results, but they were clear as day.

“Positive…”

“Congratulations!!!”

The boys had followed you to the bathroom, cheering and letting off confetti poppers. You stayed frozen in shock, trying to process this.

“It’s wrong… the test…”

“You can try again.” Jaehyun threw more pregnancy tests on the floor. “Better to use more than one anyway.”

“You… you…”

“Even if there wasn’t a baby inside you right now.” Yuta explained. “We’d have plenty of time to impregnate you now that you’ve graduated.”

“No… no you’re all fucken nuts…”

You threw the test in the trash and intended to leave, only for Johnny to grab your arm, holding you back. Jeno was all over your belly, grabbing it and making baby noises.

“Easy now, baby. Now that you’re carrying our kid, we gotta take special care of you.”

“I am not having this baby!”

“That’s not up for debate.”

“It’s my body! And you fucken-”

“You think you can just play with us for four years?!” Jaehyun grabbed your chin, making you face him. “Four years, baby doll. That’s a lot of time to fall in love with a beautiful body and the girl that inhabits it. We weren’t playing, and we’re not gonna let you either. Your future is ours.”

“Fuck you! I didn’t consent to this! I’m not-” Jaehyun’s grip got tighter. “Let go…”

“You gotta be careful baby, don’t want you hurting yourself or the kid. We have a nice place picked out where we can look after you.”

“Let go!”

“Listen closely, darling.” Ten had Jaehyun let you go, stepping before you. “If anything happens to that baby, you are going to pay dearly for it. And don’t get any silly ideas in your head, you’re still young and very fertile, we have no problem tying you up and breeding you every night if something happens. So be a good girl, and smile, you’re gonna be a mother.”

“You’re crazy!”

“And you’re very hormonal, must be the baby. We should get you home.”

“No, no! Fucken let me go!”

“I can’t wait for the pregnant waddle.” Jeno cheered. “You’re gonna get so big!”

“I wonder if it’ll be a boy or girl.” Yuta said. “Maybe there’s more than one in there!”

“That’d be so cool.”

“We’re gonna be dads!”

“I can’t wait!”

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writing-in-glitter-pen · 11 months

Note

Your "Genshin man love languages" is making me all fuzzy and warm inside and I'm kicking my feet in the air and and giggling and trying to act normal I swear-

If you feel like doing more, would you mind doing it for Zhongli as well? And whoever else you feel like throwing into the mix? Thanks for making my day better, hope you have a good one yourself!!!

AAAHHH!!!! It makes me SO happy to hear you enjoyed it!!! Literally nothing makes me feel as good as hearing my work made your day better. I’ll cry ♡

Genshin Men and Their Love Languages Part 2!

If you haven’t seen part one with Diluc, Kaeya, Ayato, and Thoma, go ahead and take a look! Read and see what your sweetheart partners do to make you feel loved ♡

Zhongli, Xiao, Wanderer x gn!reader II romance, fluff!!

Notes: Xiao’s is really long but I just couldn’t help it!! I need the Xiao stans to rise up cause I don’t know anyone else who likes him :(

No one in Liyue Harbor is new to the sight of the refined and composed Zhongli walking arm in arm with his pretty little lover—he totes you along everywhere, the koi pools, the various shops in the square, the boat docks. You two take multiple daily walks together; one in the morning, one (or two) in the afternoon, and one at night. This routine of yours was Zhongli’s idea—“My dear, every moment I spend with you is a blessing.” he said, taking one of your hands and bringing it up to his lips to place a soft, purposeful kiss to your knuckles, “If you’d allow it, it would be the most gracious gift for you to join me on a few strolls throughout the day. So that I may be selfish and have more of you.”. This, of course, exemplifies his love language of quality time. You’d think Zhongli, who has lived though so many moments, experienced so much time, would no longer see the value in the seconds of a ticking clock. He’s had thousands of years to experience anything he wanted, a mere ten minute walk is a speck of dust in the utter expanse of his lifetime. But a ten minute walk by your side? He would give absolutely anything to experience it; mora, hours of labor, his right hand, anything. And he has the privilege of it every day for free. All because you’re gracious enough to bless him with your love—he feels like the luckiest man to ever traverse the plain. Every moment with you is truly precious to him; every word uttered from your mouth, every touch to his arm or shoulder or face, even every sip you take from the tea he brewed for you—just watching you enjoy the treat during your teatime fulfills him like nothing else ever has. Your existence may be one one-millionth of his lifetime, but every second you exist in the world is a second Zhongli desperately holds to his heart. You brighten his entire life, you are a glimmer of starlight in miles upon miles of the dark volume of the sky. He will treasure you for absolutely every moment he gets to.

Xiao is, respectfully, an idiot when it comes to expressing affection. He’s new to physical touch, so he rarely reaches for you, uncomfortable with the new feeling and worried about hurting you or drawing your anger somehow. The most you’ll get out of him, on a good day, is maybe sitting between his legs during a cold night. And I mean cold. You’d better be shivering. You might even be able to coerce him to wrap his arms around you if you really play up how cold you are. He also isn’t sure exactly what gifts humans like—he’ll regularly bring you qingxins because you expressed your favor for him, but other than that, he’s pretty lost. Like a bird, any shiny or colorful thing he finds while he makes his rounds around Liyue, he’ll bring back for you. You have a collection of various colored feathers, buttons, even some crystals! He’s also just horrible at expressing his feelings though words. He’s not used to feeling these things for another person, so how the hell is he supposed to convey their meaning when he can’t even interpret it? And he really doesn’t have a lot of time for dates and dinners when he’s busy protecting Liyue most of his days and nights. Of course, he’ll set aside some time for you—he can’t ever stay away from you for long, and if you call his name he’ll be at your side in a second, but it’s not really the surefire way for him to assert how he feels about you. That leaves only one more love language, one he is actually proficient at, rather than just trying his best. Acts of service. He has spent his entire life in service to Liyue, and now that you’ve entered his life and become something just as precious to him, he’ll do absolutely anything and everything for you. Especially when it comes to your protection. He personally escorts you anywhere you need to go; to work (though he doesn’t understand why you must put yourself through labor?), to the market (though the crowds make him nervous, it panics him much more so to think of you bearing a sea of potential predators alone), on your walks through the beautiful groves and mountains of Liyue, anywhere you’d otherwise be alone. If he can’t be with you during these times, he entrusts you to Morax and only Morax. Though he hates asking the archon he serves (or used to serve…) such a favor, he’ll do it in a heartbeat if it ensures your safety. You don’t mind it either, Zhongli is a wonderful companion. If there’s anything you need, Xiao does not hesitate to fetch it for you. You need to go to the market for eggs? No need, without you even asking he’s brought back at least twenty from the roof of Wangshu in. You need Cor Lapis but have trouble mining it yourself? Consider it done. And don’t even get me started on if you need assistance in a fight—you’ve never even seen an enemy because no matter where you go, Xiao was already a mile ahead of you, taking out any camp or gang of unsavory characters.

Not only does he ensure you’re safety while you’re outside in broad daylight, but he watches over you every night while you sleep without fail—he never wants to leave your side when you’re in such a vulnerable position. If you play your cards right, you can even get him to cuddle with you, despite his reservations about how being under the covers will delay the time it takes for him to grab his weapon, should danger find its way into the room. “Isn’t it more prudent for your arms to be around me, that way your body is shielding me from any outside threat?” you say, such a cute pleading look on your face. He can’t argue with that one, so you get your way—having substantial cuddle time with your lover. In this way, acts of service enables physical touch! Oh how he’s such a fool for you. And, though he’ll never admit it…he loves the way holding you feels. You’re warm—like his own personal sun, and you smell so wonderful—he unconsciously buries his face in your hair or your neck, just to get a little bit more of your sweet scent. And…you’re so soft; he loves the way his hands feel pressed against your torso or gently rubbing up and down your arm. You hands too…they’re so soft and delicate, he finds himself holding and massaging them after you’ve long fallen asleep. There is no limit when it comes to what Xiao will do to keep you safe and happy, you come first to anything—you have his heart, and with it, you have him. Absolutely all of him.

Wanderer, like Xiao, has absolutely no experience in the romance department, let alone the intimate relationship department at all. His friend group consists of exclusively Nahida and the Aranara. And Nahida can read his thoughts (if he lets her). So there’s not a lot of expressing his affection for others that goes on in his life. Now you’re his…lover? His…confidant? His…absolute only person he will ever give his heart to and it’s a miracle you even got it but now that you have it he has no idea what to do but he loves you so deeply that it makes his soul ache? Yeah that’s about right. He tries to express how he feels through words, but they come out wrong, and he usually masks them with a taunting remark. He tries to be physically affectionate, but he’s so terrified of rejection, he can only bring himself to hover-hand your shoulder at most. The physical affection responsibility falls to you and you alone. So it’s up to you to give him hugs and kisses and all of the relationshipy things! He acts like he doesn’t love it, but the redness of his cheeks betrays him. His favorite is when you get really excited about something, and you suddenly grab him and mash his cheek against yours in a hug around the shoulders—bouncing and planting a kiss on his face. He goes completely silent and complacent, red in the face as he softly reaches to hug around your waist and hold you as you squeal and celebrate. He feels weird doing acts of service for you; it’s not that he doesn’t want to. If you ask him, he’ll do anything for you in a heartbeat (though he may complain). But he’s scared to do something without you explicitly telling him to—worried he’ll mess up and draw your anger or resentment. He won’t admit it, but he does enjoy your company, though he’s nervous to ask it of you. Anytime you spend by his side is a remedy for his lonely soul—engaging in idle conversation or walking the forest together, he’ll take absolutely all of it, though he may lie and say you bug him. Though if you try to leave, he’ll physically get in your way with a “but now that you’ve already spoiled my afternoon, you might as well stay.”. The love language he is most comfortable expressing, the one that leaves the least amount of fear in his chest at the notion of being rejected, is surprisingly, gift-giving! Any little trinket that makes him think of you is collected in a heartbeat. He’ll pick flowers, fruits, even leaves if it might be even be remotely enjoyable to you. He knows you love Zaytun peaches, so nearly every time you two go on a date or otherwise meet up, he’s brought you a crateful of them. He always has to help you carry them to your house, which is a sneaky way to get to spend more time with you! He always excuses it away with “I just picked too many for myself while I was out.” Sure. Remind me, didn’t you say you loathed anything sweet? Oh, you don’t? Right. When he finds himself in the marketplace, any hair pin, bracelet, necklace or fabric he thinks will look pretty on you, he’ll purchase with a pout on his face and a bashful look away from the cashier. He just can’t resist the desire to see you wearing something so beautiful…something that frames your natural beauty…something that came from him. When you do wear something he gave you, he can barely stand to look at you for more than a few moments, nervous you’ll hear his artificial heart thundering in his chest. Though, when you’re distracted, he can’t help but stare at you with the most puppy-eyed, loving gaze…you really are so lovely. Wearing something he picked for you makes him feel like your his—like you’re pridefully adorning a mark that tells the world you belong to him. You make him finally feel secure that someone loves him…that someone is proud to be with him and feels grateful for him. You’re a grounding force in the complicated labyrinth that has been his life. You represent new hope for him…hope for stability and love that lasts.

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ragingbookdragon · 1 year

Text

It’s exactly a quarter past nine when his eyes snap open at the sound of soft music coming from Spades’ side of the wall. He tries to ignore the irritation and rolls over, hoping that if he buries his head deep enough into his pillow that it’ll drown it out. It doesn’t matter because he’s already awake and he’s not going back to sleep. His phone buzzes on the table and he picks it up.

Awake yet?

He rolls his eyes at Spades’ question.

I am now.

Wanna come over? I’m doing a spa night. Gaz and Soap are here. Price said maybe next time :(

Ghost is now curious and he rolls out of bed, crossing from his room to hers and tries the door. It’s already unlocked and waiting. Immediately, he’s taken aback by the two men reclined on the queen-sized bed, wrapped in giant fluffy blue robes, towels on their heads. Their eyes are covered with slices of cucumbers, gold crescents under both eyes, and a tea-green face mask painted on. They look awfully comfortable as Spades, who’s wearing the same thing save the cucumbers, is doing their nails.

She looks up with a smile and hooded eyes, beckoning him with a tip of her head. “Go shower. Bathrobe and towel for your hair are in the bathroom.”

“I’m…good,” he replies and goes to sit on the sofa, but her bare leg lands on his middle, foot pressed into his stomach; Ghost’s eyes take in the smooth skin and freshly painted toes—blood red, always Spades’ favorite choice.

“Shower,” is all she says, with a smile that’s a lot more threatening if he decides to disobey her.

He rolls his eyes and takes her foot gently in his grip, digging his thumb into her calf as he bends it back to where she had it. “Fine. But I’m not wearing the hair towel.”

He disappears into the bathroom, spends all of ten minutes in before he returns, smelling of lavender, vanilla, and stargazer lilies, an almost cozy look on his face as he rests on the end of the bed in the comfy robe.

Spades turns on him and crawls into his thighs, pushing his hair back so she can see what she’s working with. “I see you haven’t been using the face cream I sent you a year or so ago. That cream costs a fortune and you’re wasting it.”

“I’m not afraid to get old,” he mutters as she takes a brush and opens the tea green mask, starting to paint it on him. “Why worry about the wrinkles?”

“Because crow’s feet are gross and you have wrinkles,” she replies and sets the gold jellies under his eyes. “You need to take care of your skin.” Her fingers gently place the cucumbers at his eyes before she takes his hand and starts buffing and filing his nails.

“I can’t believe you managed to convince them to join you in this.”

“Well, you see, Soap and Gaz haven’t fought me for ten years. They like me.” She looks at Soap who is now asleep, Gaz not far behind. “My money too, it seems.”

“You can’t win everyone with money,” Ghost says.

“I don’t have to, Simon, most people like me for me.” She switched hands and gently massaged them with an oil. “The only reason you don’t like me is because we’re much too similar. Whereas I’m just the kinder version of you.”

“You’re wrong.”

“Oh please,” Spades says with a grin, starting to move. “It’s okay to be honest, Simon, it’s really not going to hurt my—”

“I like you,” Simon interrupts and puts a hand on her thigh; he doesn’t have to remove the cucumbers to let her know he’s staring right at her. “I just…have trouble accepting how free you are. Like you have nothing to lose and you’re still okay with life.”

Spades reaches up and plucks the cucumber from one eye and tosses it into her mouth. “Simon, I was two when my mother put a gun in my hands and taught me how to shoot dead center. I was eight when I realized I could kill a grown man with any weapon given to me.” She applies a clear lip calm to his lips; it smells like spearmints, Spades always smells like lilies and spearmint. Simon's always liked how she smells in those moments when he gets close enough to knife her that he can breathe in her scent. “I’ve spent my entire life being a killer because it’s what I was made to be. I am far from free. The money, the life, the luxuries I have? There’s always an expense to be paid for it. It’s a piece of my soul every time. Even if the lives I take are some of humanity’s worst, I still remember. I will still remember even when I am dead and gone.”

She stares at him. “You, Simon, are still worthy of something good. And your infantile belief that my life is so much greater than yours, or that I still have nothing to lose is idiotic at best.” Her eyes search his. “What do I have to lose? Everything. All of me.”

Simon falls silent and she gently reaches up, brushing dampened blonde hair aside. “I didn’t want you on this team, Spades.”

“I know.”

“Not because I hate you.”

“Oh?”

Simon shifts uncomfortably, like he’s about to reveal a big secret. “Those times when I’m fighting you…it’s one of the only times I feel like things are okay with life. Like there’s an equal to my own soul.”

Spades smiles at him, and for once it’s not the smile that means she’s hiding something. “Careful Simon, I’ll think you like me a little too much.”

“Would that be so bad?” he asks, he hopes.

“No,” she murmurs and rolls off his lap. “But you should aim higher than me, Simon.”

The reply dies on his tongue as she nudges Soap and Gaz to wake them up and gossip about the new recruits, particularly the newest sniper from Austria.

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deancasbigbang · 9 months

Text

Title: When Dreams Come True

Author: Avonlady

Artist: Dream Pencil

Rating: Explicit

Pairings: Castiel/Dean Winchester; Sam Winchester/Eileen Leahy; Apocalypse World Charlie/Stevie; Donna Hanscum/Jody Mills; Claire Novak/ Kaia Nieves

Length: 66156

Warnings: Canon Typical Violence; Mild Depressive Elements; Minor mention of Drinking as a coping mechanism

Tags: Canon Divergent; Angst and Fluff and Smut; Dean Winchester has a wing kink; Adoption; Plot Twist; Inappropriate Use of Grace; Dean Winchester Wears Panties; Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms; Bottom Dean/Top Castiel; Happy Ending

Posting Date: October 26, 2023

Summary: After Chuck is defeated, Jack forces Dean and Cas to finally admit their feelings to each other and gives Cas his wings back in the process. They end up getting their happily ever after while Sam settles down with Eileen. Ten years they spend together as a couple, hunting when they need to, but mostly living the domesticated life Dean always wanted and Castiel always wanted him to have. Unfortunately, it all comes crashing down one day when Castiel goes on a hunt and doesn’t make it home. Dean will do whatever it takes to get the love of his life back and ends up getting more than he bargained for when he finds him again. This fic is canon compliant through Season 14 and starts off during the Ouroboros episode S14E14, from there it becomes Canon divergent with some of the rest of Season 14 and Season 15 being the same, but slightly different. S15E20 doesn’t exist and there is an alternate storyline 10 years into the future.

Excerpt: The thing with Dean and Castiel now being boyfriends that Dean finds interesting is that nothing has really changed other than the fact that they kiss each other now. He and Castiel had basically been dating since the moment they met, but they were the only two that didn’t know about it. Sam isn’t even surprised when he finally makes it back to the bunker and catches them making out on the couch in the Dean cave while watching a movie. He just tells them to scoot over so he can join them. “What movie are we watching?” he asks. Dean looks over at his brother with the bitchiest bitch face to ever bitch. “What do you mean what movie are we watching? You’re not even going to comment on the fact that Cas and I were just playing tonsil hockey.” He holds his finger to Castiel’s mouth because he knows the angel is going to say something about tonsils having nothing to do with hockey. “Why would I say anything? You two can do what you like. I’m surprised this is the first time I’ve walked in on you two kissing though. I thought you just waited until you were alone in your bedroom or something. Just thought you were against PDA?” “We just started kissing today. Why would we have been kissing before?” “People who are in a relationship usually kiss. You mean you two haven’t kissed before today?” “We weren’t in a relationship before today.” Sam just stares at him for a minute as if he doesn’t understand what is going on and then the lightbulb over Dean’s head finally turns on. “Wait, you thought we were in a relationship?” “Well, yea, weren’t you?” “No.” “Oh, my mistake.” “How long ago did you think we started dating?” “I don’t know. Nobody can really put a date on it, but at least since Cas came back from being possessed by the Leviathans, some think before that.” “What do you mean nobody? Who else thought we were dating already?” Sam stares into space for a minute like he’s trying to calculate something in his head. “Pretty much everyone who knows the two of you.” “Unbelievable.” Dean storms out of the Dean cave and looks back when he notices that Castiel isn’t behind him, so he yells back as he’s walking. “Cas, are you coming?” He hears Castiel apologize to Sam for leaving so rudely. He would have to explain to Castiel that we don’t apologize to annoying little brothers when they are being annoying. Dean continues the walk to his room with Castiel on his heels. He waits for the two of them to get into the room and then he slams the door for good measure. He knows Sam probably didn’t hear it because the bunker is too big, and they are too far away, but it makes him feel better anyway.

DCBB 2023 Posting Schedule

#dcbb 2023 #fic preview #2023 promo #deancas #destiel

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all-the-things-2020 · 5 months

Text

Late Night Talking - Chapter Three

Summary: Dieter and Emily go on date number two at Venice Beach.

Rating: PG

Notes: I’m writing exclusively from Emily’s POV but will include little transcripts here and there to show Dieter’s perspective. I gave Dieter a brother named Friedrich. They call each other Freddy and Deet.

[Telephone call between Dieter Bravo and his brother Friedrich]

Friedrich: What happened now?

Dieter: Why do you assume something happened? Maybe I’m just calling to hear your amazing voice.

F: Because it’s one o’clock in the fucking morning, Deet.

D: Shit, sorry. It’s only ten here. But Freddy, I have to talk to you. This is big, bro.

F: Work big or personal big?

D: Personal. I think I just met the woman I’m going to spend the rest of my life with.

F: [sighs] Is this going to be like Jonathan?

D: No. Nothing like Jonathan. That was just … I was stupid then. And horny. But Emily — her name is Emily — she’s amazing, Freddy.

F: I’m sure she is, but don’t get ahead of yourself. You always leap without looking.

D: I know but there’s something … we just clicked, you know? Met her in a bookstore and we went to another one for our first date. Couple of drinks, dinner at a tapas place. Nothing fancy but … I haven’t felt this alive since I stopped using.

F: I’m happy for you, Deet, but be careful. Don’t jump into anything. Promise me.

D: I’m gonna marry her.

F: Give it a year. If you still feel the same way, then go for it.

D: A whole year?

F: A whole year. Promise me, Deet.

D: [sighs] I promise. But mark your calendar. I’ll be calling you a year from now to tell you we’re engaged.

F: If you say so. Look, man, I need to get some sleep.

D: Okay, sorry. I just … I had to tell you.

F: I know. Make good choices. Night.

[Call ends]

****************************************************************************

I texted Dieter as soon as I got home and he replied instantly.

Me: Home safe

Dieter: Same here. Had a great time tonight.

Me: So did I

The typing indicator showed up, then disappeared, then showed up again. When it disappeared for a second time, it stayed off. I was puzzled until my phone rang.

”Hello.”

”Hey, I hope you don’t mind but I figured it’s easier to do this talking than texting. I hate texting, anyway.” He chuckled softly.

”It’s fine,” I said. “So, you had a good time?”

”A great time,” he corrected me. “I … look I’m not really that good at this kind of thing. In my line of business you get people fawning all over you and they always want something … it’s hard to trust, you know? But I didn’t get that from you.”

”I know you’re famous and all that, but you’re still just a guy,” I said. “I had that bubble burst a long time ago when one of my friends introduced me to one of the members of a band their Dad knew. I thought it was going to be magical and he turned out to be boring. Literally spent most of the time talking to her Dad about some kind of woodworking tool he’d bought and how he was trying get his son to make a bird house.”

Dieter laughed. “I’m not that boring, I hope.”

”Not at all. But you’re still just a guy. Who happens to make his living pretending to be other people and gets paid obscene amounts of money to do it.”

”Not that obscene,” he said. “At least, not for a while.” He cleared his throat. “Look, before we go any further, I’ve got to be honest with you. I’m kind of fucked up. I mean, more than the usual ‘everybody’s messed up one way or the other’.

“I’ve been in rehab. I was using a lot of shit to escape reality and … I almost died on the set of Cliff Beasts 6. Like literally OD’d and they had to restart my heart. I swore off the hard stuff after that and checked myself in. No more coke, no more acid, no more mystery pills.

”And I connected with my therapist there. She’s amazing and she gets me. So I have rules now. Alcohol if I’m with other people, never when I’m alone. Nothing stronger except this one brand of edibles that mellow me out when I’m super anxious. And I’m on meds to straighten out my brain chemistry. And I have a session with her every week. So, that’s me …”

“I knew about rehab,” I said carefully. “It was on the Internet and gossip magazines. But I didn’t know you almost died. That must have been really scary.”

“Scared the shit out of me,” he said. “There was this girl who worked at the hotel. She’s the one who found me and helped revive me. She professed her love for me in the ambulance and … it lasted about three weeks. I woke up one day and realized ‘Shit, I’m in my forties, and this girl’s in her twenties. What am I doing with my life?’ And I checked into rehab the next day.

“I had to drop out of a couple of projects, and my career was already heading down the crapper anyway — I mean, Cliff Beasts? — so I’m kind of starting over.”

”That’s okay,” I said. “Like I said, you’re just a guy who happens to be an actor. Your job doesn’t have anything to do with why I enjoyed the evening with you. We would have had fun if you were a CPA or a garbage man or whatever.”

“Yeah, and that’s why … I’d really, really like to see you again. Soon.”

”So would I,” I said. “I’m off work for the summer so my schedule is wide open.”

“How about Sunday? I have some shit to take care of tomorrow for a charity. Wait, that didn’t come out right, it’s a charity, it’s not shit …” He sounded a bit flustered. “Sunday. We can go to the beach. Unless that’s too long a drive for you?”

”Traffic shouldn’t be too bad on a weekend. And I haven’t been to the beach for a while. I’d love to.”

”It’s a date then. I’ll … I’ll text you tomorrow what time to meet and where, if that’s okay?”

”That’s perfect,” I said.

”Well, I should let you get to bed. I’m sure you’re tired after listening to me all night and driving and everything.”

”Yeah, you should get some sleep, too. Got to be fresh for the charity shit, right?”

He laughed. “Yeah. Good night.”

”Good night.”

The call ended and I sat on the couch staring at my phone for a few minutes. Then I texted Sam.

*****************************************

We were on the boardwalk at Venice Beach. It was a hot day, so the place was crowded, perfect for people watching.

“Oh, my God, your dog is so cute!” Dieter fairly ran across the boardwalk to a young couple with a Corgi on a leash. It was wearing a bow tie. “Can I take a picture?”

I followed more slowly, ready to apologize to them for my date’s ridiculous behavior, but they were already making the dog pose and look even more adorable, if that was even possible. Dieter snapped a picture of the dog, then shoved his phone at me before getting down on the ground. “Get a picture of me with the dog,” he said. His goofy grin was irresistible. I snapped a couple of pictures of him and the dog, then we chatted a bit with the couple. The dog was a boy, named Kirby, and while he seemed to enjoy the attention, he was a bit aloof, as Corgis often are, until he very solemnly and daintily licked my hand. His owners gushed over how he doesn’t normally like strangers and I should feel special.

“She is special,” Dieter said, giving me a squeeze.

They awkwardly asked for an autograph and a selfie. Dieter obliged, with me taking the photo for them. We said goodbye, and Dieter wistfully watched them walk away. “Now that made my day,” he said.

I arched an eyebrow at him. “You’re on a date with me and meeting a dog is the highlight of your day?” I teased.

“No, no, I didn’t mean it like that,” he blustered.”Like, the dog is the icing on the cake. You’re the cake.”

“Come again?”

He scrunched up his face. “It’s like … okay, icing is nice, icing is great, but by itself it’s kind of gross. Too sweet. You need the cake to give it meaning. The cake is the foundation. The icing is optional but the cake is essential.” He shook his head. “I’m not explaining this right.”

I grabbed his hand. “I think I can see the sentiment behind this rather tortured metaphor,” I said. “Cake is good even by itself; icing enhances it but you don’t really need it.”

“Exactly,” he said, raising our joined hands to his mouth. He kissed the back of my hand. “This would have been a great day even without the dog, but the dog made it even better.”

“I’m only letting this go because it was a Corgi,” I told him. “Any other breed and I’d be insulted, but damn, Corgis are adorable.”

He laughed and put his arms around me, pulling me in for a kiss. A skateboarder zipped past. “Get a room, boomers,” he yelled.

“Hey, we’re Gen X,” Dieter yelled back. “We don’t give a shit!”

“You are such a dork,” I said, laughing into his chest as he flipped the kid off.

“Ah, you love it,” he said.

“I do,” I admitted. “You’re ... adorkable.”

“Now who’s making shit up?”

“Shut up and kiss me again.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

****************************

“Let’s go in the water,” Dieter said, tugging at my hand and leading me off the boardwalk and into the sand.

“We don’t have bathing suits,” I protested. I stopped to take off my flip-flops; it was nearly impossible to walk in sand with them on without tripping over my own feet. Dieter pulled his own shoes off as well, and we continued across the beach, shoes in one hand, holding hands with the other.

“We’ll just get our feet wet,” he promised. “Come on.” He whined like a little kid who wanted candy. “Pleeeease.”

I laughed. How could I resist him when he was such a goofball? “Okay, but not too deep,” I said, realizing I sounded like a mom. “I’m not getting all wet and then having to sit around in soggy shorts the rest of the day.”

“I’ll be careful, I promise,” he said, but there was a wicked gleam in his eye that I didn’t quite trust.

We waded out into the water, letting it lap against our ankles, the occasional wave breaking harder and splashing us up to our knees. “Next time, we’ll wear our swimsuits,” he said. “Bring a boogie board or something.”

“I can’t swim,” I admitted. He stopped dead, staring at me.

“What?!,” he said incredulously. “You grew up in SoCal and never learned to swim? How is this possible?”

I was embarrassed, but decided to tell him the truth. “I have a phobia about water,” I said. “If my face gets in the water, I panic. I failed swimming in high school, the only F I ever got on my report card.”

“Well,” he said, “we’ll have to fix that. Lucky for you, I have a pool at my place, and I’m a very good teacher.” He slid his arms around my waist. “Do you need to get out of the water right now?”

“No,” I said. “This is fine. This is fun. It’s just when the water gets on or around my face.”

“Okay, then,” he grinned. “Let’s play some more.” He darted off down the beach, splashing water behind him as he ran through the surf. I gave chase, laughing as I tried to catch up. He was a total goofball, but he was my goofball.

*****************************

I was pretty sure I had a sunburn. We’d been good and applied sunblock before we got out of the cars, and reapplied later, but I could still feel the heat on my skin. “Ooh, shave ice!” I cried as we came around a corner. It was a very hot day and nothing is better on a hot day than a shave ice.

We bought two large shave ices, cherry for me, and a multi-hued mixture of flavors for Dieter. “You’re boring,” he said, pointing at my solid red treat with his plastic spoon.

“Not boring,” I said. “Classic.” I took a big bite and savored the sweet, cold ice as it melted on my tongue.

He shook his head and dug into his own ice, as we sat on a bench facing the ocean. The on shore breeze kept the heat from being overwhelming and the shave ice cooled me off quickly.

“Ah, shit, brain freeze!” Dieter said, holding a hand against his forehead.

“Don’t eat it so fast, doofus,” I said, poking him in the side with my elbow.

He stuck his tongue out at me. It was dyed a dark purplish color from the combination of flavors. “Gross,” I said. “See, that’s why I go with the cherry.” I stuck my own tongue out, knowing it would be a bright red.

“Well, you certainly don’t need lipstick,” he said, pulling out his phone and taking a quick photo, which he showed me. My lips were cherry red.

“Ah, you’ve discovered my cunning plot to replace makeup with shave ice syrup,” I said. He leaned in for a kiss.

“Mmm,” he said. “It tastes better than lipstick, I’ll give you that.”

I shoved him away. “You’re so weird,” I said. “Eat your shave ice before it melts.”

“You’re so bossy,” he grumbled, as he shoveled another spoonful of ice into his mouth.

“I work with teenagers,” I reminded him. “I think I can handle your sorry ass.” I took a big bite of my own shave ice, but instantly regretted it. “Ow, ow, brain freeze!”

Dieter nearly fell off the bench laughing, and I joined him, as soon as my head stopped pounding.

***********************************

The sun was low in the sky as we made our way toward the parking lot. “Next time we’ll get here later, rent bikes, and stay to watch the sunset,” Dieter said. His arm was around my waist, his sunglasses sliding down his nose as he gazed down at me.

“That sounds wonderful,” I replied. “But how about our next date, you drive out my way?”

He scratched his chin with his free hand. “I guess I could,” he said. “Is there anything out there to do?”

”I hope you’re being facetious,” I told him. “Because only I can diss where I live.”

He chuckled. “Totally facetious. Besides, as long as I’m with you, who cares where we go?”

”Smooth, Bravo, real smooth.” I tugged his arm, pulling him to a stop. I went on my tiptoes and kissed his cheek, in one of those delectable little bare patches in his beard.

”It worked,didn’t it?” he said smugly.

#pedro pascal character fanfiction #dieter bravo #dieter bravo x ofc #the bubble fanfiction #dieter bravo fic

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spasmsofthought · 1 year

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i’ll be getting over you my whole life (teenage!shang-chi x fem!reader)

A little thing, because I was inspired and I have a newfound love after watching Shang-chi and The Legend of the Ten Rings again. Also, I realize there aren’t enough fics for this guy. Maybe a part two soon xo

+++

There is a weight that you have to learn to live with when you eat and sleep, and if you’re a boy, train, at the Ten Rings compound.

It’s something you discover your mind only has the capacity to form around so you bend and don’t break.

He pulled you aside just a moment before, but it wasn’t to say anything. In the shadowed, open-air hall that lines the outside courtyard, he stands opposite of you.

This is a new, soft thing, and those are hard to find as deep and high in the mountains as you both are in this compound, so he doesn’t touch you. Not at first. His face gives away nothing, but you’ve been learning how to read his eyes. They hold the depths of all that he is holding but doesn’t speak about.

If your mother was here, she might roll her eyes at the way you think about him. The way you act as if you are beyond the age of 14 (though in some ways, you are). She would tell you, from the wisdom of experience, that you should be careful. That the pain that came from first love as a teenager wasn’t always worth it. That there were more important things to focus on.

Shang-qi’s touch is tender as he leans forward and slowly takes your hand in his. It’s somewhat unfamiliar and awkward because you two haven’t had a lot of time, if any, to spend together. But there have been some sweet pockets, little moments, where his smile changes the whole course of your monotonous day. Stolen glances before training as you linger as long as you can in the courtyard before you are sent away. Whispers in the darkened hallway between his room and yours. Sitting across from each other at breakfast, before anyone else has arrived, early enough to watch the sunrise without interruption.

You both don’t understand much about dating, or love, but you understand that whatever this is between you needs to stay under the radar and private. You think you’ve done a good enough job to not alert anybody, especially Shang-qi’s father. He’s gone a lot anyway.

There’s a weight Shang-qi carrying tonight that he wasn’t carrying before. It’s in the set of his shoulders and his posture.

You hold his hand for a moment longer before releasing it.

Instead, your hands come to cup his face.

“Do what you must tonight.”

You let the silence surrounding you both echo your words as Shang-qi exhales. A small moment of vulnerability comes as he presses his forehead to yours. You close your eyes and soak in the feeling.

When you open your eyes and find Shang-qi gazing at you, you know. He won’t be making any promises to you tonight.

Your eyes begin to water but you swallow the tears into your throat and inhale. You take a second quick breath once you realize this is the closest his lips have come to yours.

You try to imprint this feeling into your mind so that when you remember this moment again, you can make it last as long as you can.

He cannot bear to stay goodbye, so he will not say anything at all.

“Go,” You take a step back, “Your last words should be to her.”

Xialing, his sister, waits on the steps a few feet in front of you. He gives you one last lingering look and then turns to sit with her. They talk only for a moment before the sound of helicopter blades echoes against the sides of the mountain and almost overwhelms the silence the compound is set in.

You can tell even from the distance that he says no words when Wenwu greets him. He only nods as he grabs his bag and walks away.

It will be fifteen years before you see him again.

#shang chi x reader #shang-chi x reader #shangqi x reader #xu shangqi #xu shang chi #shang-qi x reader #marvel #shang chi one shot #shang chi fic #shang-chi one shot #shang-chi fic

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asshlyyyy · 2 years

Text

Fine Lady (Austin!Elvis x Reader)

I know I haven’t posted for the last week or two? But, I have been busy at work. Thank you so much @oh-kurva for requesting this. I hope you enjoy. This gave me the possibility to work on something shorter while I work on bigger and larger projects that I have in mind.

This can be read as a part 2 of “I’ll be Their Daddy” but can totally work as a stand along. You do not have to read the original.

Reference

Masterlist

Pairing: Austin!Elvis x FemxReader

Warnings: Spelling and Grammatical Errors

Word Count: 1k

"Okay, mama, be careful now." Your daughter said as you got out of the car. She came to reach for your arm but you swatted her away.

“I am perfectly fine, your father can help me.” You said as Elvis got out of the car and came to your side. “Plus, I’m not incapable of walking. I am perfectly fine.” Elvis chuckled at your response and shook his head.

The two of you were… well what they considered your elder years. Yet, you both were extremely healthy, and Elvis was still performing. Which you argued against sometimes, but he loved to perform and you couldn’t take that away from you.

As you guys got into the venue and made it to your seats, which happened to be in vip because of well… Elvis of course. You ordered water and smiled. You leaned into Elvis’ side and smiled up at him. He was the love of your life, and you owe him everything in the world. While nothing can make up for him taking you and your pregnant self in… you tried your best.

The time came and your eldest grandson was walking up onto the stage. He introduced himself and gave a bit of a background before he started his show. Your grandson was a comedian and you absolutely loved his jokes. He often time attacked Elvis with his jokes, but they were always just too good not to forgive.

"Everything was going great." Your grandson started up. "We were eating dinner, and everything was fine."

"And then my grandma broke out a scrapbook. And we're going through the scrapbook picture by picture." He explained as he recalled the events of Sunday's dinner. A ritual you could say. Every Sunday your family would come to your house. Thankfully, your husband loved to spend money... and got you a table that will fit your family.

You had your first child at nineteen. Which was in 1956. That same year... your boyfriend broke up with you because you were pregnant. Then, Elvis took you in and helped you throughout your pregnancy. Especially after you gave birth to your daughter. You two eventually got together. You got married in your twenties, and eventually had another kid in 1960. Then yet another one in 1964. That was when you two stopped.

Your first daughter, gave birth to her son in 1976, when you were nearly forty. And now here you were in your late fifties. Sitting at your grandson's stand-up show. He was always the jokester. You couldn’t be more proud of your grandson… well… just your family in general. Ever since Elvis took you in and showed you what love was… It was the best thing ever.

"She was like, look, this is a picture with my first car. This is a picture of me and my first job." Your grandson explained the events that have just taken place a couple of days ago. Every Sunday your family would come over to your house, and you were cook dinner. Your kids, their kids, everyone really.

"And then we got a picture of her when she was in her mid-twenties." He started. You generally had no idea where he was going with any of this.

"My grandma was looking fine. Superfine okay. Too fine to be my grandmother." Your family seemed to be all taken back, hell man… you were taken back. Fine was a weird word and honestly, you were still trying to get used to the new lingo used nowadays.

"And with the sepia filter on it, the brown filter that's not supposed to make you attractive. The one that will turn a ten into a seven. Nahh, she was still a ten. Okay." He waved his hand. The crowd let out laughs and you couldn’t help but smile. All he wanted to do was make others smile and laugh, and he was doing that.

"I know it sounds weird. I know it's weird. It's weird to say, okay, it's weird." He admitted. You smiled and leaned into Elvis. He looked down at you and smiled. He may not have his young boy looks anymore, but that didn’t stop the love you felt and had for him.

"But you understand it's ruining me. I have to live with this knowledge for the rest of my life. It's ruining me."

"Because now every time I try to talk to a girl, I'm like, yeah, you're cute, but... You ain't Nana." Now, you doubt that was the real reason for him not having someone. Times were changing, and you didn’t see people getting married a as really in life then when you were young. Times were changing and you were sure he would find someone, and you will be coming to his wedding before you knew it.

"Honestly, I can’t even be mad. He’s right.” Elvis shrugged from beside you. A light laugh came out of your mouth as you shook your head.

"Oh shush," You slapped Elvi's shoulder. Elvis whined in response and pressed his forehead against your head. Even for his age, he still acts like a whiny teenager. Better yet, he still acted like a toddler.

"Hey though, I'll tell ya... my nana she's in her fifties right... she still looking fine. Now I'm sure once I step off this stage my mama gonna whoop my ass, so I better stop." That caused everyone to laugh. Your family felt mortified, besides yourself and Elvis.

You felt flattered yourself, and Elvis just… well he was proud to call you his own. So, any attention you got on your beauty… he was proud. Because he knew that you were his and no one else can have you.

After the end of the show, everyone met up by their cars. As your grandson walked out you went straight to him and gave him a big old hug. You were so proud of him. Your daughter on the older hand felt so embarrassed. She was of course overreacting like always. That’s all she did nowadays.

“I am so proud of you.” You whispered and kisses his cheek. He let out a light chuckle and shook his head.

“Thank you, nana. I hope I didn’t offend you so much.” He apologized. You just shook your head in response.

“You didn’t,” you smiled and pulled away. “You could never offend me.”

Want to join my taglist? // Let me know If I spelt any wrong! I have updated my form for my taglist. You will be tagged under everything now in that selected fandom/person. Just makes my life easier.

Taglist: @babyhoneypresley, @mirandastuckinthe80s, @mommy-maia, @yagirlalexx, @slutforblueeyes, @alligator-person, @diorxmimi, @anangelwhodidntfall, @pumkiinpasties, @djconde58, @starryhazee, @21bruhs, @girlblogger2002, @dollfaceyourfear, @smbonilla2002, @homebodybirkin2003, @apparently-sunshine, @dark-as-love, @pandora-journey, @hsstylesrings, @jeonggukschris, @4everrmore, @bewitched-tales, @thelaziest10, @butlersluvbot, @curatedbyemily, @lovingly-unlovingme, @starlight-jpg, @omegellenlouise, @gyomei-tiddies, @Chlobug07, @wandawiccan60, @re3kin, @Itzjira18, @passengerjett, @neepo, @vane28282, @emilykolchivans, @gothantoinette, @gruffle1, @ilovemuppets, @hangmanswhore, @theinvibislecapricorn, @hariestyles1, @annamarie16, @holliemahady, @misacc08, @Brighteyesscum, @marchingicenotes7, @callthedarknessdown, @domaniquessidehoe, @gay-af-satan, @skinnypantsmcgee, @sassyblazecloud, @lovelyney, @lordandmistress, @Sharkslayersblog, @billysway, @nuo0n, @coldonexx, @adoreyouusugar, @aliciaelle47, @kh1898, @danitheedanimal, @raefoxiegirl, @cobra-kaii, @rylee-durhxm, @bob-the-tomato, @crabat-the-queen, @naveyelise, @austinbutlersgirlfriend, @iluvnerds69, @hopefulinlove, @aradevil, @Tylerdurdenisme, @laperceval, @xcallmetaniax, @londonalozzy, @mslizziesblog, @rosemochaaesthetic-blog, @bxbylexi23, @gloomynigvts, @persephones-blood-iris, @milaa24, @randompointlessbeauty, @auds02, @BubblyYork, @nora-nexus-34, @jazmin2211, @kittenlittle24, @Rqseycheeks, @moonbird1507, @bobthefishiesworld, @cevans-winchester, @luckyevansstan, @noorreads, @idc123sworld, @normatural, @hauntedarchivesx, @Luna4mnoon, @imagineslut01, @Kayleealicej, @thatcrazyfangirl22, @amiets2, @loveisalover, @myguiltypleasures21, @poppet05, @xcallmetaniax, @fullmetal-falcon, @kaitaesupremacy, @rainydayz101, @asd-n-adhd-fox, @loveisalover, @eliseinmemphis, @adaydreamaway08, @stitchattacks, @cmrxac, @vintagegirl50s60s70s80s, @purexfuego, @dkayfixates, @fa1ryprincess222, @virgils-left-hoodie-string

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chaoticgoodthief · 22 days

Text

A Gem for The Princess

Written for @feline17ff using the prompt of Oblivious x Smitten! Hope you enjoy! 😄

“And her eyes, oh her eyes are like the distant ocean, roaring with power and beauty yet always so far out of reach,” the Hero moaned, slumped dramatically on the closest surface for the fifth time that day. “I could drown in those eyes and thank her. But alas, I find myself surviving off nothing but the raindrops of her gaze. But this gem! I am sure that the Gem of Burning Passion will let her see the love in my heart!”

“Can someone please shut him up?” the Barbarian pleaded, groaning when nobody responded to his request, “Come on, I even said ‘please’ this time!”

“You wouldn’t understand! You have never felt the coldness in your heart of a love unrequited!” the Hero cried out, finally moving out of his dramatic pose in the Rogue’s trembling arms. And like Cinderella at midnight, he dashed away into the darkness.

“Ten coins on him getting lost,” the Barbarian laughed, throwing down the coins in question onto their makeshift table.

“This is not a joking matter, Barbarian,” the Wizard scolded, before letting a small smirk make its way onto their face. “Make it twenty, coward.”

“R-Rogue?” the Cleric hestiantly called out, snapping the Rogue out of his trance. “You’re n-not usually this… q-q-quiet.”

“Don’t worry about me, pipsqueak,” the Rogue laughed back, flashing a fake grin with practiced ease. “I’m just scheming what I should buy with the coins I snatched from Hero back there.”

“You haven’t paid for a single thing in your life,” the Wizard deadpanned back. “I don’t expect you to start now.”

“You wound me,” the Rogue gasped, heart over hand in a perfect imitation of Hero. “When have I ever been anything other than the most handsomely noble hero with any of you?”

“And you didn’t even steal anything from him.” the Babarian added, drawing the shocked gazes of all of the other members. “What? I’m dumb, but even I know you always make the same stupid face after you steal something.” To his side, the Wizard blushed a furious red and stared at the Barbarian like they wanted to break their vow of celibacy.

“He’s right. You didn’t steal anything. Then why did you catch him when he-”

“I’m going out to find Hero,” he snapped, storming in the vague direction that Hero had disappeared.

“Hey! That wasn’t part of the bet! That doesn’t count!” he heard the Babarbian yell out behind him. The Rogue ignored him, heart pounding.

“Hero? Hero, if you’re dead I’m going to get a necromancer to bring you back to life and kill you myself!”

“Have you ever been in love, Rogue?” the unnaturally soft voice of Hero asked. He followed the noise, finding the other man sitting against a tree, gaze staring mournfully in the distance.

“Nah,” he lied, sitting down beside the Hero. Well, sitting was probably not the right term for it, but it was at leasy in the vague resemble of a sitting position. “Too much trouble.” Hero laughed, and he smiled.

“You are trouble, my dear friend. Trying to avoid it would be like trying to stop the sun from shining.” But his good humour faded as quickly as it came, and he returned his gaze to the distant horizon. “She will never even notice me, will she?”

“What the hell do you mean?” the Rogue snapped before he could stop himself. “You’re… you! You would spend years grow a rosebush so that you could shape it in her image! You would thank someone for stabbing you if they painted their blade your favourite colour! If she can’t see-” He forced his mouth shut before he could go any further.

“...You’re right!” the Hero declared, smiling bright enough to blind someone. But the Rogue was too used to shiny things to be affected. “I shall fight the gods themselves if it means gaining a mere fraction of her time!”

“Woah, woah, woah, how about you just stick to finding that magic gem for her? Sometime this week, maybe?”

“The gem! How could I have strayed so far from my goal?” The Hero pulled the Rogue into a tight hug, with he accepted with awkward stiffness. “Thank you! Thank you! I don’t know what I would do without you!” And just like that, the Hero was gone again, off into the darkness.

The Rogue stared at his retreating form, completely frozen. A tratorious part of his brain began telling him how good of a rogue the Hero would make with the right training. He shook his head, forcefully dispelling the thoughts. He had one rule. Never steal people. And the Hero? He knew far too well that the Hero would never belong to him.

With a sigh, he made his way back to the campsite and tried to stop thinking about shiny things.

#oblivious x smitten #my writing #unrequited love #writing #someone has a crush #tehehehe #goofy hero #unrequited crush #writers on tumblr #writeblr #not sure if I should tag that but might as well contribute this to that community as well #wrote this in one day like a madman #instead of my seven other WIPs hahaha #but am actually using a similar ship in one of my WIPs so this was actually perfect to get the angst juices flowing #oh right #angst #thats a tag i forgor

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veronicaphoenix · 4 months

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Chapter tags & trigger warnings: Chapter dealing with heavy topics, including descriptions of physical abuse. Reader discretion is advised. | Word count: 3.3k | Cross posted on AO3. | Series masterpost. ✧.*

General trigger warnings: This work addresses and depicts issues related to addiction and violence, contains explicit sexual content, and explores themes of childhood trauma. Reader discretion is advised.

I dialed her phone number again, exasperation prickling my skin like a relentless itch. The familiar ringtone echoed through the air, emanating from behind Mitch’s apartment door. A furrow formed between my brows as I approached, now understanding that I wasn’t imagining it. Lia’s phone was inside his house, and I could hear it ringing. I climbed the two steps to the entrance. The vague iPhone melody ceased, coinciding with the end of the call on my phone.

“Lia,” I shouted, heedless of any prying ears nearby. My desperation morphed into anger, fueled by days of silence. I was determined to find Lia. “I know you’re in there. I’ve been trying to reach you for four days and you haven’t given me a single sign of life, so open the door at once or I swear to God I’ll break it down.”

Finally, the sound of movement behind the door stirred. With a click, the latch was removed, and the door creaked open. The first thing I saw was Lia's long brown hair.

I was pissed at her. After spending the day with me last week —after she came to the hospital—, she had vanished like a ghost, leaving my messages unread and ignoring my calls. I was worried enough to not let it go another day like this. Whatever was going on, she was going to tell me right now.

“Lia, what the hell is going on with you? You’ve been MI—"

She opened the door all the way, letting me see her bruised face. The right side of her face was reddened, and her cheekbone was swollen. the area around her eye was a rather nasty purple color.

The sight hit me like a physical blow.

For ten seconds, I did nothing but stare at her, my face transfixed by the horror of what I was seeing. She was wearing an old white T-shirt that hung loosely on her frame, exposing more bruises littering her arms. Dark circles shadowed her eyes, evidence of sleepless nights, and her hair hung in disheveled, greasy strands.

Then, a surge of fury swept through me like a tidal wave.

“Where the fuck is he?” My voice erupted from deep within me, laced with a trembling growl.

She didn’t say. She just sniffed, her breathing quickening.

Before I could muster another question, Lia threw herself into my arms, and her tears started flowing freely.

It took me a while to respond, my mind unable to process the reality that just unfolded before me. I held her tightly against my chest, as if shielding her from the world with my embrace.

This had been in front of me all these months and I hadn’t seen it.

Her sadness, the late-night calls, her insecurity, the childish questions, the pain on her side when the woman bumped into her at the hospital…

My blood gone cold.

“Lia," I murmured softly. I forced her to take a couple of steps inside the house and with one hand I pushed the door closed behind us. With tender care, I cupped Lia's face in my hands, careful not to cause her any harm. She clutched my hoodie with clenched fists. “Lia, where is he?” My own voice sounded foreign to me. There was a ferocity in it that I hadn’t known I possessed.

Her big, brown eyes met mine, and I saw the tears that pooled there and then welled up and continued rolling down her cheeks.

“Where is he? Where is he, Lia?”

She shook her head and managed to slow her sobs to tell me he wasn't home, still not letting go of me.

I didn't know what to do. A myriad of feelings had come over me and I was struggling to make decisions. A sense of defeat washed over me. Lia was hurt. Mitch, who had been my friend once, to whom I had introduced Lia years before, had hit her. He had hit the person he claimed to love. And I hadn’t noticed what was going on until it was too late.

My fingers slid along Lia's jaw line, dejected, but I had no right to feel that way, not when Lia clung to me as if I were her lifeline.

“I need to get you out of here.” I dropped my hands to pry one of Lia's fists from my hoodie and pull her into the room she shared with Mitch.

As soon as I stepped inside, a wave of disgust spread through me. The room was a mess—unmade bed, dirty clothes strewn across the floor, shoes scattered here and there, and an open closet door. It was a far cry from the organized person Lia was and from the way we kept our house when we lived together with the other boys.

I couldn't tell if this mess was Mitch's doing and Lia had been forced to live with it, or if it was a reflection of Lia’s own deteriorating state of mind.

“Get a bag,” I instructed, my voice firm yet gentle. “Pack your things. I’m taking you out of here.”

I picked up her iPad, the book she had on the small table beside the bed, and a pair of flip-flops tucked away in a forgotten corner of the room. As I looked back at her, a small glimmer of pride flickered within me at how quickly Lia was responding to my presence and my words. Despite the pain etched across her face, —despite the physical bruises—, and the lingering tremble in her body, she had ceased crying and stood resolute in the center of the room. In less than a minute, she had prepared herself, holding a backpack and meeting my gaze with determination. I reached over to take the backpack from her hands and put in the items I had collected. I took her hand again and we walked out of the room. I silently hoped that neither of us would ever have to set foot in it again, although I understood that sooner or later, whatever happened, someone would have to come back to pick up the rest of her belongings.

In the entryway, Lia let go of my hand momentarily to lean against the shoe rack, grab her gray UGG boots and put them on. She grabbed the house keys, and like a child seeking reassurance, she grabbed my hand again.

During the car ride to the my house, Lia said nothing, and I found myself at a loss for words as well. The initial terror that gripped me had eased with Lia’s presence beside me, curled up in the passenger seat, gazing out the window. Yet, working its way inside me was a torrent of rage, anger, an aggressiveness that I didn't know if I would be able to control once I had Mitch in front of me, because it was clear to me that that moment would come. I would not let him get away with what he had done to her. He would pay for it.

There had been so many times we'd been out together before he started dating Lia, and I'd seen him smiling countless of times as he wrapped an arm around Lia's shoulders. I'd seen him kiss her, whisper things in her ear... It had just been a facade. No one could tell me that when you love someone, you're capable of hurting them like this.

I needed to know what exactly happened, how long this situation had been going on, but I had enough sense to understand that now was not the best time to suffocate her with questions.

We reached the house. When I opened the door and walked with Lia inside, Jesse and Jolly’s faced looked up from the sofa and their expressions turned to confusion and then shock as they beheld Lia’s bruised face. Jolly immediately rose from the sofa. Jesse remained frozen in place, mouth agape. Lia walked without acknowledging them, crossing the living room, headed towards my bedroom. I silently signaled to Jesse and Jolly, shaking my head in warning, before placing my palm on Lia’s lower back as I followed her lead.

When we entered my room, Lia sank hopelessly onto the edge of the bed. Without meeting my eyes, she buried her face in her hands and started crying again.

All I could see was the vulnerable little girl I had found so many times hiding in her own room at her mother’s house, scared at the way her own mother had treated her, the things she had said to her, terrified at what old men had tried to do to her.

The lump in my throat swelled. A tear slipped down my cheek. I felt helpless. I was useless.

Kneeling before her, I reached out and lightly touched her knee, instantly regretting touching her.

“Lia, tell me how I can fix this,” I pleaded, my voice choked with emotion.

Through sobs and sniffs, she uttered, “you can’t.”

My heart sank deeper as I gently grasped her wrists and looked at the bruises marring her delicate features. The nausea threatened to overwhelm me.

“Hug me?”

I wasn’t sure if I heard her right; her request sounded faint, almost lost amidst the turmoil of emotions swirling around us.

One way or another, nothing was going to separate me from her again. Nobody would touch her again as long as she had me.

I opened my arms, and she leaned into my body, sliding down from the bed until she knelt in front of me, positioned between my legs. Together, we clung to each other, our tears blending into a symphony of shared pain.

When I returned to the room a while later after a brief escape to the kitchen to get some water and an urgen update with Jesse and Jolly —I hadn’t been able to stop Jolly from grabbing his car keys and sprinting out of the house; he went after Mitch—, Lia sat on my bed, her back against the headboard, a stack of pillows piled beside her. She looked tiny on my large bed. She wasn't doing anything. She just stared at her hands, which were folded in her lap. Her eyes lifted when I entered the room. I tried to smile at her. There was no other place I wanted her to be at that moment than in my bed, but it broke my heart to see her hurt.

I sat on the bed, close to Lia but without invading her space. Lia had an expression that was not just helplessness. There was also some shame in her still red and watery eyes. We held each other's gaze for a while. I wanted to ask her if she was okay, or at least if she felt a little better. I wanted to ask her when it had happened and if it had happened before. I had one question after another piling up inside me, but I knew none of them was the right one, so I ended up reaching out and touching her knee with my fingers in a comforting gesture. I didn’t know where else I cold touch her.

Lia observed the movement of my tattooed fingers against the fabric of the sweatpants she was wearing, holding her breath until the dam broke, and thick tears spilled forth again. First, she covered her face with her hands, and in response to my broken voice calling her name, she crawled across the bed to reach me, throwing her arms around my neck.

I hugged her and held her against my body as much as we were allowed to be together. I let her cry, stroked her neck with my chin, and kissed her hair. If this was all she needed, this would be all I’d give her.

"You’re safe now, Lia. I promise. I won't let it happen again. I'm sorry I even let it happen. I'm sorry I didn't realize earlier."

"I'm sorry," she mumbled over my shoulder. "I didn't— I didn't tell you... " Her words faltered, choked by tears. "I didn't tell you because I was scared and ashamed. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Noah."

"Shh. I knew something was wrong. I should have done something sooner."

Lia's arms tightened around my neck. I felt her fingers clutching my hoodie again.

After a few minutes, as her breathing steadied and her heartbeat slowed to match mine, she gradually pulled away, pushing her hair back from her face. I asked her what happened, and since when it had been happening, how many timesMitch had hurt her.

Sat cross-legged in front of me, she began to explain.

She explained everything. She answered each of my questions despite the tremor in her voice and the lump in her throat. Five minutes into talking, I offered another glass of water to her, which she gulped down with a little bit of struggle.

She told me how things had begun to go south a while after she had started spending more time in his place. He had proven to be someone quite jealous from the beginning, and his anger was easily awakened, but aren’t we all a little bit like that sometimes?

The first time he pushed her, Lia brushed it off was an isolated incident, unwilling to acknowlege the growing stain it placed on their relationship.

But as time went on, the stain continued to grow, spreading like ink on a canvas. With each passing week, each day, Lia found herself sinking deeper into a quicksand, unable to escape until it had engulfed her entirely, covering her mouth, and she couldn't scream.

“The time you caught that virus and I stayed with you, I told you we had had an argument that morning and I left to go back to my place, right? I didn’t tell him I’d stayed the night with you, but he guessed. I don’t know why. He came to my place, he pushed me until I fell, and he—he kicked me.”

The pain on her side when she came to visit me at the hospital.

"And this," she continued, gesturing to the purplish stains on the right side of her face, around her eye. As she lifted a finger to point at it, I noticed how much her hand was trembling. "This happened a few days ago, after I came back from the hospital and stayed with you after he—he forbid me to see you.”

Her eyes met mine. She didn't want me to feel guilty, but a part of me couldn't help it. If I hadn't succumbed to my need to have Lia by my side when I was sick, if I hadn't been a child and had taken care of getting medicine without relying on her, she wouldn't be bruised now. Right?

She lifted the hem of the t-shirt she was wearing to reveal the extent of the bruising on her ribs. Mitch knew where he had hurt her, and he targeted the same spot after discovering Lia had gone against his orders.

"Noah, please,” she interjected, “I know what you're thinking: If you— if Jesse hadn't called me, it wouldn't have happened, but it’s not like that at all. He would have done it eventually any way, and maybe I would have never been able to tell you, and things could have..." Her voice trailed off. She sniffled hard.

Being there, I realized something that hadn't crossed my mind before, something that I hadn’t dared to consider.

When I voiced the question, I held my breath.

"Lia, has Mitch ever forced you to...?"

I didn't want to say it out loud. Vocalizing it was the first step in making it real, and if her answer turned out to be affirmative, I a puzzled furrow between her brows. When I didn't press further but my gaze intensified on hers, she understood what I meant. She dropped her gaze and head with a heavy sigh, and my world collapsed.

But then, she answered ‘no’, and I understood that dropping her head had been a gesture of embarrassment that I didn't comprehend until she spoke again.

"We stopped having sex a long time ago,” Lia explained softly. “He wasn't... He wasn't rough or anything. He was just not attentive, basically. He lost interest very quickly."

A part of me felt relieved. Mitch didn't deserve any part of Lia, and now that I knew the extent of his cruelty, it only reinforced that he had never deserved her in the first place.

Since childhood, Lia and I had confided in each other and had told each other almost everything, from our first time to our most irrational fears. Having Lia in front of me, bruised, shrunken, filled me with a nauseating mix of emotions. I couldn’t bear the thought of how much she had been keeping inside and for how long.

"I don't know what he wanted from me," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "Or what he still wants. These last few months..." She shrugged. "Maybe it's what I deserve: my mother never really loved me. I was a nuisance to her. My father, who knows? And Mitch... For a while I thought he really loved me. I just…” A heavy tremble took control of her. “I just wanted someone to love me."

I clicked my tongue when she burst out again and her tears spilled down her face and onto the duvet.

"None of them deserve you. And don't think for a second that no one loves you, Lia."

"He'll come looking for me. He'll know I'm with you,” she fretted, clutching at the white sheets.

"It doesn't matter,” I insisted. “He won't touch you again."

"I don't want him to hurt you," she sobbed.

"Don't worry about that.”

I stroked her right cheek with two fingers, wiping away a few tears as delicately as I could. Her pale complexion and tear-stained cheeks revealed the toll this ordeal had taken on her. The intensity of her bruises seemed to deepen in the dim light of the bedroom, a haunting reminder of the violence she had endured and that will stay with her for days. Maybe nightmares.

I would get nightmares after this.

"Why?" She whispered into the air, tormented by the questions that had no easy answers.

Why me, she wondered. It tore me apart to see her like this. She didn't say anything else, but I knew everything that was going through her head. Like me, she was also someone who overthought things too much, especially things that weren't important.

"What matters now is that you're here and you're not alone. And don't worry about anything, please. Especially about staying here."

"I don't want to go back to my mother."

The mention of that woman made me raise an eyebrow.

"Why do you think I would let you go back there? Lia, you’re staying here. You’re staying with me. You can stay here in my bed. I can sleep in the pullout sofa in the studio, and you can stay in this room."

What’s mine is yours. It’s always been.

Lia began to protest, but I silenced her with a shake of my head.

"Don't be so stubborn, please."

She sighed. We stayed silent for a while. Jesse was doing something in the kitchen to keep himself from losing it, too, and the noise from the dishes and cutlery reached the room.

Eventually, I stood up and approached Lia, looming over her. I raised a hand and brought it to her face. Before touching her, I asked for permission, to which she nodded with a slight head movement and a tired look.

I moved several strands of hair away from her face and tucked them behind her ear, revealing the red and swollen area on her face.

"It will disappear in a week," she murmured, as if she thought that would reassure me.

"That's not what worries me," I replied.

Two minutes later, I sank to my knees again and buried my face in Lia’s lap, grabbing her with trembling fingers as I realized that I had let this happen. Lia’s fingers tangled into my hair. We cried again, breaking the silence and clutching to each other.

#noah sebsatian #noah sebastian fic #noah sebastian fanfiction #bad omens #bad omens cult #bad omens fic #bad omens fanfic #noah sebastian x ofc

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thefloatingpickle · 2 years

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All Shook Up

A bored, lonely librarian gets a break from the mundane when a night out leads to a meeting with Tom Bennett. Tom!FemOC Older woman (not by much)

Please excuse errors I have no one checking this for me

Triggers for a bit of a tough spot towards the end

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London was nothing like what Adaline Harper imagined it would be. Back home in Chicago she had dreamed it into a mythical world of fairytales and gentlemen. In reality she had seen very little in the way of magical thinking and even less of a gentleman since coming over at twenty two to finish her masters in Library Sciences. Don’t get it wrong, she was glad she had come, spending the rest of her life toiling away on the north side of the city with her alcoholic father and useless brother was her worst nightmare. Losing her mother so young from cancer after watching her waste away at the service of her cold hearted, often cruel father only fueled her need to escape. Originally she had only planned to go as far as maybe the east coast, but when she was presented the opportunity to study abroad by her favorite English professor she jumped at the chance.

Unfortunately for Adaline she had not been swept off her feet by a strapping young brit like she had imagined. Much to the contrary she went on several dates with mostly what would be considered posh type men she met attending classes, and all of them were only interested in the rumors that American girls were quick to the sheets. So she had quit trying and dedicated herself to her studies. When she finished she was quickly awarded a position at Central Library in Manchester.

She liked it well enough, the head librarian was a stout cold woman, but she often brought in food for the girls who worked the stacks and had even brought Adaline a gift of a beautiful sterling silver necklace with a small pendant in the shape of a book for starting in her new position. She worked the main desk in non fiction. It was mostly long boring days, academics and curious minds coming to find this book or that, but on slow days she could go into the shelves and find herself something interesting to keep her mind busy, history had always been a favorite subject.

It was in the middle of one of these slow days that the slightly younger girls who worked reshelving the checked in books in her section approached her for what may be the hundredth time about going out with them for a drink after work. “You can’t spend every night curled up in your flat reading romance novels, can ya Addie?” Tilly, the louder of the two girls with her beautiful blonde hair and lean features announced too loud for the surroundings. “It was one romance novel Tilly, ONE!” Addie spit back in a harsh whisper. “One or ten it’s still a sad sight. You being only what Twenty-Five and all? Come out with us, you’d have a blast. None of those uptight wankers you’ve talked about dating at Uni, our mates are fun!” Becky, the sweeter of the two, pleaded with you. Her brown hair stopping just above her shoulders showed off her sharp jawline, which seemed unusual given the softness of the rest of her features. “I have letters to write. My aunt has been bombarding me with posts for the last two months and I haven’t gotten back to her or my nieces.”

They rolled their eyes in unison, “You could write during work you know. We all do. Besides it is my BIRTHDAY” “I like to write in the privacy of my home thank you.” “Ugghhh,” “Quiet!” The head librarian had heard the noise from the main lobby and made her way in to announce that you were bothering the small smattering of patronage the building had pulled in on the clear spring day. “Sorry Ma’am.” Addie whispered. “Get back to your shelving girls, I appreciate the invite but going drinking with a bunch of twenty year olds isn’t my idea of a good time.”

With a chuff and a turn they were back to work and you were grateful for the silence until he walked in. “Addie girl, you look dashing as ever.” “Hello Greg, how are you today?” You couldn’t stand Greg, he had seemed nice at first but after the fourth time he asked you to dinner you started running out of good excuses. Not that he wasn’t handsome, but his parents were on the board for the library and he strutted around the place like it made him a prince. “You know they’ve just opened a lovely new cafe down off of Pike street, a beautiful view of the Medlock from the outside seating.” Her stomach turned as she felt the question coming, “Oh yea? Sounds lovely.” “It is, and I was just thinking how lovely you would look sitting there.” “That’s kind of you to say.” “Isn’t it? How about tonight?” She wracked her brain for an excuse, any excuse, just then she caught the sight of Tilly watching her interaction with a satisfied smirk. “I can’t, you see I already have plans.” He lifted a brow in surprise, “Plans? You, to do what?” “Well you see it’s Tilly’s birthday and I’ve promised to get a drink with the girls down at a pub later.” He didn’t believe you for a second. “You… are going to a pub with Tilly and Becky?” Like a saving angel Becky popped up from behind you. “Oh yes, she is. We had to practically beg. But you know even Adaline isn’t monster enough to miss out on Tilly’s celebrations.” I let out a sigh of relief as he walked away seeming flabbergasted. “Thank you Becky, I owe you one.” “Don’t be thanking her too fast now Addie, you’re coming to the pub tonight or I’m going to run right behind the good lad and tell him you’ve played him a fool.” Tilly said head peeking out from the stacks with a grin on her face.

_____________________

“I cannot believe I roped myself into this”, Addie thought as she made her way down the cobblestone path, her mary janes clicking loudly off the road at every step. She had agreed to meet the girls at McDuff’s, a known hang out for the sort of kids Tilly and Becky liked to spend their time around. Petty criminals who were just as likely to walk out on a tab as they were to start a street fight just in the name of a couple minutes entertainment.

She’d gone home from Central and put on one of the few dresses she had that were more suited for a night out than a day at work, the deep green dress went perfectly with her pale skin, and auburn hair. She had had to dig through half of her vanity drawers to find the one shade of lipstick she had that wasn’t just a pale nude, but the red went well with the dress and for once she felt a bit pretty.

She heard the place before she saw it, rumpus laughter and loud music pouring out the door as she rounded the corner.``You actually came!” A shout rose out over the noise. “Hello, Tilly. Happy birthday.” Was all she got out as she led you into the small but jovial building. “Everyone, THIS is Adaline! She came!!” Adaline almost felt bad, she didn't realize it would make such a difference to Tilly whether she had come or not. “You must meet everyone.” The young woman exclaimed as she led her over to a section of standing tables swarming with people. “Obviously you know Becky, then this is Adam, Luke, Nathaniel, Jackie, Devlen, and Peter.” You couldn’t help but notice how intensely male company outweighed the female. “Hello, nice to meet everyone.” “And what about me then?” A voice came from behind, it was pleasant with a sort of smugness that suggested confidence. “Oh yes we can’t forget you can we,” Tilly said, turning her to meet the newcomer, “this is Tom.” He had a wide smile on his face that was friendly in a cocky way, but damn if he wasn’t handsome. “Hello, luv.” He reached out his hand to her expectantly. “Hi” Addie took his hand and was surprised by how tightly he gripped the shake. “Always a pleasure meet’in a lass lovely as yourself.” She couldn’t help but roll her eyes. “I’m sure it is.” Her quick remark gained her another wide grin. “Drinks all around then?” He put the question to the group but never broke eye contact. “Yes please!” Tilly said in reply, as he turned to leave she leaned in and whispered in Addie’s ear, “Careful with that one, he fancies himself a heartbreaker but has about as much game as a sailor in the desert.” The girls laughed at the joke and shortly after Addie found herself with a drink in hand enjoying the night more than she had expected.

The music was almost too loud for conversation but the girls' friends were funny, and light hearted. Addie felt almost guilty for avoiding them for so long, but often also felt the distinct gap in age as one would make a comment about being nineteen or twenty and at that she would take another large gulp of her drink, which seemed to always be magically replenished when she would finish. Everything was going well, except that every so often she would feel a set of eyes on her and when she turned to see who it was it was always Tom. He was quieter than she had expected, choosing more to watch and listen than to speak up and join the cycle of storytelling, but his presence loomed over her in a way that made her unsure of herself. She often found herself checking her compact to make sure her lipstick was in place, or pulling at the hem of her dress to check it was sitting right, and every time she did she would look over to find another too confident smirk across his face. After a couple hours she decided she needed a smoke and stepped outside, though as soon as she had her cigarette between her lips she realized she couldn’t find her lighter in her small handbag. “Dammit.” A quiet laugh came from behind her, “Trade you a smoke for a light?” She knew who it was before turning her head. “Alright Tom.” She agreed, handing him her smokes. He took one and placed it between his long thin lips, then held up his lighter in front of her smoke. “Pretty ladies shouldn’t be lighin’ their own sticks.” She couldn’t help the smile, or the blush that came over her cheeks, “Thank you.” “Thank you.” He replied and then they stood mostly in silence smoking. “How do you know Tilly then?” The question had almost startled her out of her own wandering train of thought, “Oh, uh, we work together at the library.” He smiled, “A jumpy bit you are eh? You can’t be a cart girl though can you?” She felt the flush of embarrassment come over her. “Why is that?” “Well, not for nothing but you look a touch grown to be reshelving books.” “So I look too old then? Well no I’m not a cart girl, I’m a librarian. I work the non fiction desk.” There was a bite to her tone that he seemed to catch quickly. “Now hold on lovely, wasn’t calling you old. I said grown. You’re clearly not some twenty year old girly.” “And what about you Tom? A ripe old, what eighteen?” He grimaced at that. “I’m twenty years old, I’ll have you know, a grown man. And I promise that means in every way that counts.” He gave another confident smirk. “Well twenty is still awfully young for me, being twenty five and all.” “Five years aint much unless you make something.” At that he leaned closer, tossing the burned end of his smoke to the side. “Bet I could make you feel twenty again.” He pressed himself closer to her, coming around to face her directly and Addie was suddenly very aware of not only the brick wall behind them but the years past since a man had been this close. “I’m sure it would be a valiant effort Tom but unfortunately I’m not interested.” She couldn’t meet his eyes because she knew he would find the lie in them. “Are you not, weren’t you in there fixing your lips, and touching up your skirts every time you looked at me.” “You were the one starring Tom, it made me…” Her voice trailed off, not waiting to admit he had any affect. “Nervous?” He finished for her a glint of pride in his eye that now drove her to annoyance. “I’d like to go back in now please.” She was stern in her tone. His smile dropped and he stepped out of the way. “Alright love, no harm intended.” He stayed behind as she walked back in and she didn’t see him again for the next hour she stayed. Finally ready to go home she went looking for Tilly to say good night, when she found her she was outside in the alley smoking, with Tom leaned against her side. Addie didn’t know why the sight bugged her but it did. So instead of approaching to say goodbye she simply yelled over her shoulder as she walked away. “Happy birthday Tilly, thanks for the invite.” “Bye Addie!” She heard her yell, a small giggle escaping her.

Adaline didn’t hear the footsteps behind her until they were almost on top of her. “Well Ello’ there pretty lady.” The first man said, “Too late to be walking home alone isn’t it.” The second followed. Addie was panicked, she was too far from the bar to turn around, but still several blocks from home. “I’m actually just walking to meet a friend. They don’t live too far off from here.” She prayed they would care, they didn’t. The first one reached forward and grabbed her wrist as the other came around behind her. “I don’t think you know anyone from round these parts miss.” One said. “Please just let me go home.” She had never been more afraid in her life. “Oh we will, right when we’re done with you.” Bile rose in Addie’s throat as she realized she was trapped. “Oi, you there. Watcha on about then?” The shout came from about a block behind, and sounded familiar. “None of your business lad so piss off.” “Is that you Erik? And Shawn then is it? I know you too, work over at the butchers driving the truck. Doubt Mr. Ebbes would be thrilled to hear what you’re getting up to here?” Tom came into sight and was as much of a relief as Addie had ever felt. “We weren’t up to nothin Tom, no need to be gossiping about. Just wanted to see the lady safely home is all.” “Well I’ll take her off your hands boys, no worries there.” The two men disappeared down a side road and Addie turned to face Tom again.

“Oh god, thank you.” She couldn’t help the red hot tears as they slipped down her face. “Hey there, we’ll have none of that.” He said reaching up to wipe them away with a gentle touch from the back of his knuckle. “Nothing bad happened, you’re alright.” “Because of you.” She said, voice shaky. “What were you doing anyway?” “Walking home, I live just round this corner here, didn’t see much point in sticking around…” He looked at her, a small soft smile on his lips, “after you left that is.” Addie stood straightening her dress and hair, “And what about Tilly?” “What about her?” His brows rose in realization, “You mean in the alley? Us being close? Wasn’t anything meant by it, I’ve known her since we were kids.” They had started walking in the direction of home as he spoke. “Tilly may be my oldest mate, we’re just familiar like that. Wasn’t trying to make a move on her.” “Oh.” Addie’s voice was soft in reply, then she caught herself, “Not that it matters if you were, she’s more appropriate for you anyway.” “Appropriate?!” He nearly cackled, “What are you my babysitter now? Five years isn’t a leap you know, if I was the girl, and you were me no one would so much as blink. You’ve got yourself in your head over nothing.” “You're the same age as my baby brother Tom.” “Yea, well that is unfortunate but doesn’t make a lick of difference to my point.” The two of them walked in comfortable quiet the next few blocks until she realized they had come up on her place. “This is me.” “Right then.” He smiled at her again, “You work tomorrow?” “No, it’s Saturday, I have things to get done around though.” “Alright, well when do you work next?” “Why?” “Thought I may stop in and get a library card is all.” “Tom it wouldn’t be…” “Appropriate?” He cut her off. “Yes.” Before she could say anything else he leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers. He was sure of himself, working open her lips and slipping in his tongue before she could catch herself. He tasted like cigarettes and beer, but god did he feel good. Slim body pressing against her as he wrapped his arms around her waist, her hands went to his chest before she could stop herself. He pressed the kiss deeper, pulling her tongue to his mouth as he backed them to the doorway, one hand coming to rest on her neck. Then her senses came back to her and she pulled away. “Mhmm.” Was all he said as she pushed against him where her hands rested. “Thank you for walking me home Tom… I… I need to get to bed.” He backed up with no resistance. “Alright.” He seemed unaffected by her abruptly ending their contact as he turned to go. “See you soon Adaline.” He said in a sing-song tone as he walked down the road, whistling to himself as he went.

#ewan mitchell #tom bennett #world on fire

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