Joke's On You 16
When Fred Weasley carelessly bumps into you into the hallway, you decide to take him a notch down; not by berating him, but by showing him up at his own game of using your charm and intellect to get what you want. And it’s fine if the end result doesn’t leave everyone quite satisfied - in fact, that’s what you want…
[Fred Weasley x Reader.] [Warning: Story Contains Explicit Smut.] [Warning: Non-Consent.] [Warning: Manipulation.] [Warning: Humiliation.]
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The Slytherins came back from holiday to find the most horrendous smell lurking in their common room. The obvious answer, of course, was to simply Vanish the smell. However, the smell was sure to return again over time. Besides, everyone wanted to know what the source was. Was it Goyle’s filthy Quidditch shoes, stewing away in the far corner? Was it Parkinson’s horned toad, who kept leaving a trail of droppings from the entryway to the window? Or had Filch’s dirty mop finally gotten so incredibly filthy that instead of cleaning, it soiled everything it touched?
The Slytherins grudgingly searched the common room, walking around with their noses plugged until they were next to whatever they thought was the source of the scent, then unplugging their nose to sniff it, only to shake their head and hastily plug their nose back up. Finally, fed-up with what he called “servants’ work,” Draco Malfoy cried out in a plugged, warbly voice, “My father will hear about this!” Hundreds of miles away, Lucius felt a sudden crick in his neck.
At long last, Professor Snape was called in. Imagine his fury when he discovered a well-placed, completely rotten egg under the tile under the foot of the grand piano. He puffed up in anger, with his chest welling up so much that it strained his tightly buttoned-up black robe. He opened his mouth –
At the precise moment that Snape began to let out his breath of rage, over in the Gryffindor common room, Neville’s frog, Trevor, emitted a long, high-pitched whistle that alarmed everyone – and not in the least Fred and George. Because for a split second, Fred and George thought that their mum had followed them all the way to Hogwarts to yell at them again. It would have been good timing too, Fred thought wryly, as he, George, and Lee began to pull all manner of goods out of the secret compartments of their trunks.
Almost an hour later, Fred finally announced, “That’s everything.”
“Great,” George said. “Let’s sort it all out and write out that order form again.”
Lee nodded over at Fred’s trunk. “What’s that?”
Fred didn’t need to look over to see what Lee was referring to. There was only one item left in his trunk and he’d left it there because it would have hurt his pride to take it out. Nevertheless, the tips of Fred’s ears went red as he muttered, “Nothing. Never mind that.”
Stuffed in the corner of his trunk lay the heart-covered boxers you’d gotten him for Christmas.
* * * * * * * * * *
You were happy to return to classes – most of all, Charms. As you took your usual seat next to Kenneth, you gloated, “Well, well, so you got me in nearly all of our subjects – except this one, huh?” You waggled your finger at him. “You can beat me ten times over in Potions and Arithmancy and what-have-you, but never in Charms.”
Kenneth merely said, “You seem very happy.”
“Why shouldn’t I be?” you replied, as you sat down and began to pull your notes out. As you set your parchment down on the desk, Kenneth frowned.
“What is that?” Kenneth asked, pointing at a rude doodle drawn on the parchment.
You peered down at it. It was a small doodle of a devil cat, clearly enjoying its time as it basked in the flames of hell. You quickly turned the parchment over to hide it – only, scrawled on the back of the parchment were the words, Yours truly, Fredrick Gideon Weasley. You flushed as you hurriedly put the parchment back into your bag. Kenneth stared at you.
When you turned back around, he said, cautiously, “I wasn’t going to bring this up, but just before break, I happened to be in the Great Hall for breakfast - ”
You couldn’t help but giggle at this, as you pointed out, “You make it sound like that happened against your own will, Kenneth.”
Kenneth turned slightly pink. But he continued, “ - and I saw - well, the whole school saw - Fred Weasley asking you out.”
You suddenly went quiet.
Sensing that he had the advantage, Kenneth pressed, “Is it true?”
“Well, it sounds like you saw it with your own two eyes, so who am I to deny that?”
“You know that’s not what I meant.”
You began to rummage around in your school bag, looking for a quill or a book or something (anything, really, except that piece of parchment), when Kenneth reached over and grasped your arm to stop you. “Are you really dating Fred Weasley?”
You met Kenneth’s eyes. Oh, he’s my friend. I can’t lie to him. Besides, I’m not ashamed or anything to be with Fred. In fact, I’m rather proud of it.
“Yes,” you confirmed.
You expected Kenneth to let go of your arm, but he only held on harder as he pressed, “Have you lost your senses? Of all people, Fred Weasley?”
“Yes,” you said stubbornly, now trying to sidle your arm out of Kenneth’s grasp.
Just then, a familiar voice said, rather meanly, “Oi. Let go of her arm.”
You and Kenneth both looked up to see Fred standing there. Kenneth slowly let go of your arm.
“Hi, Fred,” you said brightly.
“Hi, hellcat,” Fred responded, though he lifted his eyebrow at you. “Interesting conversation you’re having here, huh?”
Kenneth’s brow furrowed, as he put together the drawing with Fred’s nickname for you.
You replied, “Not really. I was only slandering your name, and Kenneth here was sticking up for your honor.” You reached over and thumped Kenneth heartily in the back.
“Oh, really?” Fred said wryly, his mouth twisting into a rather cruel shape.
“Yes, really,” you stressed. “So, you should move along before McGonagall comes in and starts the term by taking twenty points away from her own house.”
“Fine,” Fred replied. But before he stepped past you and Kenneth, he said, “And it’s none of your business, innit, Towler?”
Kenneth shook his head at you, as if to say, ‘Really? That guy?’
You looked over at Kenneth and nodded, replying wordlessly, Yeah, that guy.
“But you’re a prefect,” Kenneth said, speaking quietly now.
“Yes, I am.”
“How are you going to - ? Isn’t it going to pose a problem? I mean, aren’t you going to let him off the hook now?”
“Oh, no. Absolutely not,” you said earnestly. “I’m going to be more strict with him than ever. In fact, I don’t think it’s an overstatement to say that Fred Weasley will be the reason I become Head Girl. I’m going to catch him so many times that it’ll be a new record for how many times a prefect has rounded up a villain.”
“Villain?”
“Fine. Mischief-maker. But you get my point.”
“And he’s not going to be mad at you?”
You snorted. “I damn well hope he is. That stupid Fred Weasley.”
You buried your head in your book, trying to hide the happy blush that was spreading on your face as you thought of ‘stupid Fred Weasley.’
* * * * * * * * * *
During lunch, you came over to Fred’s dormitory. Knocking on the door, you sang out, “Fred! Could you come out here, please? I have something for you.”
Inside, you heard George throw something and then call out, “Oi! Fred! Devil’s knocking on the door, and it’s for you.”
You paused. Then, you knocked on the door again and said, in a very different tone, “Hey, you in there, what did you just call me?”
Just then, the door opened. It was Fred. “Hi, hellcat. Come to see me?”
“Yes,” you said. “Could you please come out here? I want to speak with you.”
Fred started to step out, but as he did, you caught sight of George and Lee sitting on the bed in the room. You pointed at George and said knowingly, “You.”
George ignored you – and Fred had shut the door. Turning to you, Fred immediately meant to grab you and kiss you hello, but as he made to reach for you, you stopped him short by suddenly presenting him with a piece of parchment.
Fred looked down at it. “What’s this?”
You tapped the top of the parchment, where you had neatly titled it: Petition to Fred Gideon Weasley, regarding the use of certain pet names. You explained, “I would like to reserve the names, ‘Freddie’ and ‘Freddie boy’ for cases of cuteness.”
Fred instantly looked disgusted, but he also looked a tad confused. “You wrote an entire letter just for that?”
“That’s right. It’s my petition to you, my boyfriend,” you said softly. Reaching out, you gently stroked Fred’s tie. “I miss my pet names for you.”
Fred snorted. “You can call me pet names, just – just something more fitting.”
You cocked your head at him. “Like what?”
“Like…” Fred thought about it for a moment. Then, his eyes brightened, and he suggested proudly, “Like ‘Sir.’”
You blinked. “Sir?” you repeated.
Fred smirked slyly at you. “That’s right.”
“Oh…” Your brow furrowed – and then you burst into laughter. “Ha, ha, ha!” You keeled over and laughed merrily, and you accidentally forced Fred into a bow, as you were still holding onto his tie.
“Oi, you’re – you’re choking me,” Fred groaned.
“Oh! Sorry!” You let go of his tie, but you kept laughing into your hands.
“What?” Fred said defensively. “What’s so funny about that?”
You wiped tears from your eyes and waved him away, chortling, “Anyways, Fred, have a serious thought about the original petition, please.”
* * * * * * * * * *
The class after lunch was Potions. When Professor Snape stormed into the dungeon, everyone immediately fell quiet. At once, he barked out, “Weasley!”
Fred and George chorused together, “Yes?”
“On your feet!”
Fred stood up. Meanwhile, George remained sitting.
Snape glared at George. “I said, on your feet!”
“Oh, I thought you meant him. Sorry.” George stood up, and Fred sat down.
“No, both of you, on your feet!”
About half of the class giggled as George then (completely unnecessarily) sat back down before he and Fred stood up together.
“A regular ol’ circus act,” Lee murmured appreciatively.
“Stupid,” Kenneth muttered under his breath. “They’re only making Snape angrier.”
“I shall give you one chance for repentance before I report you to the Head of your House,” Snape said thinly. “Which of you disrespectful dunderheads decided it was a good idea to hide a rotting egg under a tile under the piano in the Slytherin common room?”
Your eyes flashed. Oh Merlin, I completely forgot about that.
“Neither of us, sir,” Fred said confidently.
“Is that so?” Snape sneered, clearly not believing Fred.
“Yep,” Fred replied. His eyes twinkled merrily, as if he was secretly dying with laughter inside.
George chirped up, “Cross my heart and hope to die, Professor.”
Your cheeks slowly turned red, as you realized both Fred and George were teasing you, though both of them were pros and didn’t so much as throw you a wink.
David mused, “I thought only first year girls used phrases like that.”
Your cheeks brightened even further. “Some – Some older students might use that phrase, too,” you murmured defensively.
Snape ground his teeth in frustration. “I have tried to give you a chance for repentance - ”
“With all due respect, Professor, I did all my repentance on New Year’s. I had an angel come by and lead me through the whole she-bang,” Fred said, in a mockingly innocent tone. “So I reckon I’m clean as a sheet - ”
Snape blew up. “Enough! Enough! I shall – I shall see to your punishment after class. Sit down. Now.”
* * * * * * * * * *
When class ended, you dawdled near your desk. Meanwhile, Fred and George dutifully came up to Snape’s desk.
“Are you aware of how long it took Mr. Filch and myself to discover where the horrendous smell was coming from?” Snape seethed.
“No,” George said. “To be honest, we’re not at all sure of what you’re talking about, Professor. Could you maybe explain to us -?”
Slam. Snape brought his book down on his desk. He grasped the edges of his desk and leaned over it to peer unpleasantly into Fred and George’s faces. “The two of you will never have another moment out of detention again. I shall assign to you six months’ worth of - ”
“Oh, no!” you cried out, as you dropped an ink bottle. It smashed and went all over the floor. Distressed, you sat down and began to wipe at the ink with your sleeve.
Snape berated you, “Idiot girl! Did you forget you’re magical? Move aside.”
You shifted out of the way and Snape waved his wand. The ink cleared up at once.
“Sorry, Professor,” you said earnestly. “I was only looking for my quill and ink because I had some questions to ask you about the Draught of Living Death. You were saying something about its alchemic properties and I didn’t understand - ”
Snape closed his eyes for a moment, trying to contain his fury. Finally, he said, “Read the textbook, then. I will not spend my time entertaining the most basic of questions. And, Mr. Weasley - ”
“Yes?” Fred and George chorused together again.
“Out. Get out. But be warned, if I ever catch you pulling such a prank again - ”
“Professor, we’d never - ”
“ – Honestly - ”
“- We don’t even know - ”
“ – what this is all about - ”
“ – But good day, Professor - ”
“ – Take care - ”
“- And happy New Year’s!”
The twins had been slowly tripping backwards towards the door and when they let out their cheerful New Year’s greetings, they slipped out of the room.
Meanwhile, you had finished stuffing your quill back into your bag and you high-tailed out of there as well.
* * * * * * * * * *
You spent the evening with your friends, coming up with study plans for the term. Afterwards, as you made your way back up to your prefect’s room, out from a secret passageway, a tall, ginger-haired boy suddenly appeared and wrapped his long arms around you.
“Well, well,” Fred whispered teasingly in your ear. “Look who’s become a little rogue. I always knew I’d bring you over to my side.”
You scoffed. “As if. I simply thought it was unfair that Snape was trying to punish you when he had no evidence that you actually committed the deed.”
“Mhm,” Fred agreed, squeezing you in his arms and nudging the top of your head with his chin to make you squirm, “especially because if he followed the trail all the way through, he’d find you holding the end of the rope, right?”
“No.”
“Who was the one that asked for the egg to be hidden under a tile under the piano?” Fred reached down and grasped your chin with his hand and made you turn your head to look up at him. “Who was it, hm?”
You yanked your head away and said lightly, “I have no idea.”
“No?”
“No. Truly haven’t the foggiest.”
“Maybe because you were drunk off of Firewhiskey that night,” Fred said, grinning now. “And you’d taken a bucket to the head - ”
You reached up and pushed your hand against Fred’s lips. “Shush, you.”
Fred shook his head, shaking your hand off of his mouth. “Drop any more fireworks, lately?”
You scowled. “You keep this up and I’ll drop you.”
Fred grabbed your wrist and pulled you back to him. “You could never,” he said knowingly. “You couldn’t live without me, your boyfriend.”
You eyed him skeptically. “You’re being disgusting, Fred.”
“Am not.” Fred proceeded to make all sorts of kissy faces at you, clearly making fun of you.
You took the opportunity to stomp hard on his foot.
“Ow!” Fred yelled. He hurriedly stepped back.
Slinging your school bag coolly over your shoulder and walking away, you waved your fingers in the air and called, “Come find me when you’re done being a moron.”
* * * * * * * * * *
Fred did come and visit you, in your prefect’s room, later that night.
When he walked in, he was grinning to himself and he was dusting his hands off of something…
You hesitated. “What were up to, Fred?”
“Hm? Oh, nothing,” Fred said easily. “Just testing the properties of permanent ink.”
You blinked. “Why in the world would you need to test for that? Isn’t the main property in the name?”
“Of course, silly, but how permanent is ‘standard permanent’?” Fred explained. “And would it be possible to create, let’s say, an ink that is permanent unless removed by a very particular, even singular, singular erasing liquid?”
“Well, of course it’s possible."
Fred gave you a doubtful look.
You reeled off impressively, “You’d have to find a type of ink that wasn’t based on whatever regular ink is based on. Then, in terms of creating a singular erasing liquid, it would essentially come down to an application of Golpalott’s Third Law for antidotes. In other words, the erasing compound wouldn’t ever be a simple one-to-one ratio or the simple sums of the ratios present in the permanent ink. Something alchemic would need to happen to create a true antidote – or, in this case, a true and singular erasing ointment.”
Fred clapped his hands together. “Brilliant! That’s how we can create an ink where only the prankster can erase the ink. That’s mighty helpful. Thanks, love.”
You paused. “Wait, what? That was why you asked me that?”
“I didn’t ask you, technically speaking,” Fred pointed out. “I was merely speaking aloud an observational question. It was you that couldn’t pass up the opportunity to show off and be little-miss-know-it-all.”
Your jaw dropped open. He pretended to look foolish on purpose, just to egg me on!
Fred waggled his finger at you. “Humility, love, you’ve got to learn it someday. You’re just too full of yourself.”
“Me?!” you said indignantly. “I was merely sharing my knowledge with you, hoping to educate your stupid little brain. It’s not my fault all you can think about is pranks - ”
“ – and pussy,” Fred finished for you. He pranced over to you and grabbed your face in his hand. Leaning towards you, he made a kissy face and said, in an overly playful voice, “And it looks like I’ve got both of those sorted out right here.” He squeezed your cheeks in his hand and leaned in to peck your nose.
You went bright red. “Fred!”
Fred chuckled merrily. He let go of your face, but he shoved his hands in his pockets and leaned towards you as he said, rather brightly and boyishly, “Wow, this is what flusters you? Look at you, red as a tomato. Of all the embarrassing shit you pull, the fact that you helped me develop a product is what sinks you?”
Your mouth turned into a very thin line, and you made to turn away from Fred. But he grabbed you and pulled you into his arms.
Fred’s breath tickled you as he murmured teasingly into your ear. “Where d’you think you’re going, huh? You’re in your own room. There’s nowhere to go to.”
You quickly batted him away.
Fred laughed and let you go. He then started to flop over onto your bed, but you made him wash his hands first.
You paused, however, when you heard your shower start up. Ten minutes later, Fred walked out, wearing nothing but one of your fluffy pink towels. You stared at him.
Fred smiled as he ran another towel – a lavender one – through his hair. “Like what you see, mistress?”
You cleared your throat. You did, in fact, like what you were seeing. Except his chest is too clean-looking. It doesn’t have the kiss marks that it should have… from me.
You shook your head, trying to clear your mind of such wanting thoughts. Then, standing up, you pointed to your bed. “Have a seat, Fred.”
Fred snorted. “What is this, a business meeting?”
“Yes.” You brought your notebook over to the bed and plopped down with it. You pointed to your notebook. “Listen here. I’m going to offer you a little deal. You’d be a fool not to take it, I think, but well – it’s your life and I don’t like forcing anyone into anything, so…”
Fred glanced down at your notebook. “What the hell is that supposed to be? A rune?”
“No.” You pushed the notebook towards him. “Have you ever heard of the game ‘tic tac toe’?”
Fred shook his head.
“Well, it’s easy enough. The goal is to get three in a row,” you explained. “But here’s what I propose: Every time you and George pull one of your stupid pranks and you don’t get caught, you get a turn. But every time I help a professor catch you, then I get a turn. Except if it’s Snape, Filch, or Umbridge, of course. I won’t help them catch you – unless I’m really annoyed with you, that is.”
“Why’s that?” Fred asked, curious.
“Because Snape, Filch, and Umbridge aren’t fair with their punishments,” you explained succinctly. “But the other professors are – and you do deserve to be punished. You, George, and Lee are absolutely awful students. And from the sounds of it, the three of you are developing and selling a lot of stupid things - ”
“ - Our products aren’t stupid, they’re brilliant - ”
“And I’m not going to allow that, much less facilitate that.” You gave him a stern look. “Do I make myself clear?”
Fred rolled his eyes. Reaching out, he brushed the notebook away. “Or, how about you just help me get out of every punishment ever?” He leaned back onto your bed. At the same time, he reached over and grabbed you by your waist and pulled you on top of him.
“No,” you emphasized, hitting his chest lightly with your hands. “Can’t let you do that, Fred.”
“Why not?”
“Because I’m a prefect and that means something to me,” you said. “Besides, I promised Kenneth I would continue to be a good prefect.”
Fred frowned. “You promised Kenneth?”
“Yeah, Kenneth – you know, top of our class, fellow prefect, and my study friend. That Kenneth.” You pretended as if you hadn’t mentioned Kenneth on purpose and as if you were describing him only to help Fred remember who he was, but Fred caught the mean glimmer in your eye.
Fred growled. “You tease.” He suddenly gripped your wrists in his hands quite tightly. “You’re just dangling him in front of me, aren’t you, to get me all riled up?”
You laughed softly. “Maybe,” you admitted. Looking down at your hands, caught in his, you said pleasantly, “I think it’s working, don’t you?” You then nodded down at the pink towel that Fred was still wearing. “By the way, pink looks quite nice on you.”
Fred groaned. He dropped your hands and then, pushing you off of him, he rolled over and buried his face in your pillow.
You grabbed the notebook and followed him, nudging his shoulder repeatedly. “Fred? Fred? C’mon, won’t you play the game with me?”
“No,” Fred said emphatically.
“But you haven’t even heard what the prize is,” you pointed out.
“Don’t care,” Fred said shortly.
“Do you know what it is?” you pressed.
Fred was quiet for a moment.
He’s going to ask, you thought confidently. He won’t be able to stand the idea of missing out. He’s going to ask me… any second now –
“All right. What the hell’s the prize?”
You grinned. Rolling over so that you fell into his lap, you looked up at him and whispered lovingly, “Anything you want.”
* * * * * * * * * *
“Professor McGonagall!” you shouted fiercely. “There they are!”
Fred, George, and Lee, who were all gathered around the entrance of the Slytherin common room, wheeled around. Spotting you, Fred cursed.
Dropping the net they had been installing over the Slytherin common room entrance, all three of them ran for it.
“Iterdum!” You performed a Trip Jinx, pointing your wand at none other than Fred – and it caught him.
With a shout, Fred went sprawling onto the ground. However, just before McGonagall caught up to you, two pairs of hands reached out from behind the adjacent hallway and dragged Fred along the ground and out of sight.
Huffing and puffing, McGonagall appeared behind you. Her hat was lopsided. “Where are they?”
Glumly, you said, “They left.”
* * * * * * * * * *
“First move goes to Fred!” Fred crowed gleefully as he placed an X right at the center of your little tic-tac-toe board.
You crossed your arms over your chest. “It shouldn’t count. You were dragged out like a dying seal.”
“Doesn’t matter how it happened,” Fred countered. He fell back onto your bed. Running his hand through his hair, he mused, “Now, let’s see, what shall I have you do when I win?”
“You’re getting ahead of yourself,” you said, still annoyed.
Fred looked over at you and shot you an easy grin. “Sour grapes already? Boy, are you a sore loser.”
“I’m not sore and I’m not a loser,” you fired back. “I just don’t see what the point of you running your stupid little brain is, when I’m going to win anyways.”
“It’s just part of the fun, innit?” Fred said, now grinning even more cheekily at you. “I can imagine you however I like…” He closed his eyes. Imagining you, he moaned softly.
You scoffed.
Fred smirked. Without opening his eyes, he murmured, “Good girl, you know what I want already, even without me telling you.”
“No,” you said stoutly. “Rather, I know how simple-minded you are, and how crass, and how - ”
While you were speaking, you had slowly wandered over to the bed and were now standing at the edge of the bed. Fred, still keeping his eyes closed, suddenly lifted one leg and tripped you. You fell right onto the bed, with a surprised shriek.
Fred grabbed you by the shoulders, and pushed you back onto the bed. He kissed you hungrily, making your lips part with his own and swallowing your fevered gasp. His hands roamed all over your body at once, making you go all soft and flushed for him.
“F-Fred…” you moaned softly, almost whining as he bit your lower lip and tugged playfully.
“I bet your plans for me are just as crass,” Fred whispered accusingly. “So, who are you to go calling me simple-minded and all that? Huh?”
“Well, but it’s true – mmm…” You felt Fred’s mouth push roughly against yours again, and his hands slipped under your shirt. His hands warmed up your tummy quickly and then, Fred groped your breasts adoringly, if not a little impatiently. Meanwhile, you had your hands wrapped around his slender neck and while you weren’t choking him, you reveled in being able to keep your hands there, slotted against his neck, keeping him warm while being able to hold onto him.
The two of you became lost in kissing each other for a long moment.
However, when Fred pulled away to catch his breath, you managed to whisper, “I’ve given it a lot of thought, Fred. If I win, I’m going to make you…”
“What?” Fred asked breathlessly.
“…Study.”
“What?” The romantic, heated atmosphere broke entirely as Fred sat up indignantly. “You’re going to make me what?”
Your lips, now flushed pink from kissing Fred, spread into a wicked little smile. You remained lying down, but your eyes slipped down and you gazed at Fred through half-lidded eyes as you whispered, seductively (and sardonically), “Study, Fred.”
Fred scoffed. “You’ve got to be joking.”
“Mm,” you agreed lightly. You shifted over so that you could slip your head into his lap.
Fred only scowled at you.
“Fred,” you whispered, staring up at his ugly, immature expression in secret joy.
Fred ignored you.
Your heart skipped a beat. “Fred…”
Still nothing.
“I said I wasn’t sore yet…” Staring up into his eyes and slowly reaching out to pull at the end of his tie, you asked him in a gentle and honest voice, “I have to go and patrol the halls in an hour. Before then – could you maybe make me sore?”
Fwump.
You half-gasped and half-giggled as Fred roughly threw you over onto the bed and leaned over you.
“For Merlin’s sake, will you ever put me down nicely?”
“Shut up,” Fred growled, as he went to unzip his pants at once.
“Mm, nice growl, puppy,” you cooed. “And come closer, I want to rip off all your buttons.” You reached up and flexed your hands and grinned up at him.
Fred muttered, “Hellcat,” but he did as you asked, leaning down a little so that you could have your fill of happiness.
As you ripped off his tie, which was in the way, you remarked, “Fred, you’ve tied your tie all wrong.”
“I’ve tied it this way all my life.”
“Well, it’s wrong. Why didn’t you listen to your mum when she taught you?”
Fred grumbled, “How did you know my mum taught me?”
“Of course she did,” you said knowingly. “Your mum is wonderful, Fred. It’s you who’s the problem.”
Fred rolled his eyes as you made short work of his tie and shirt, throwing them off merrily across the room, and then you reveled in the sweet happiness of sinking your nails into his handsome chest.
Fred watched you merrily marking up his chest with kisses, bites, and scratches. As you let out little purrs and happy growls, he shook his head and murmured, “Seriously so weird.”
However, as you sucked at Fred’s chest, you were slowly undressing yourself – until your shirt fell open, revealing your shape and your cute little bra, a pretty lavender thing that pushed up your breasts just enough that you knew it would drive Fred crazy.
Sure enough, Fred changed his tune quite quickly. His eyes widened and he said hurriedly, “But fuck, it’s fine, baby, when you look like that…”
Fred made to touch you, clearly meaning to rip off your bra so that he could ravish your breasts. But you caught his hand in yours. Looking up at him, you whispered, “No. No touch.”
Fred made a face. “Again?”
“Well…” You slowly brought Fred’s hand to your lips. “I get to touch you first.” You opened your mouth just enough to let his finger slip into your mouth. Then, you sucked. “Mmpfh…”
Fred let out a breath. He swore that you had the prettiest eyes, and when you were looking up at him like that, with his finger in your mouth, in between your soft, pink lips… His own mouth fell open slightly and he watched you rather dumbly.
You smirked slightly. Speechless already?
As you sucked on his finger, you gave him your orders, only you masked them as soft and sweet requests. You whispered lowly, “Be a good boy and slowly reach into your pants. Now, stroke yourself. Make yourself nice and hard for me. Yes, for me.” Your voice accidentally slipped into a more aggressive tone towards the end, as you felt yourself getting quite excited.
Fred, whose eyes had slipped shut as he slowly pleasured himself to the sound of your voice, paused. He blinked.
You distracted him quickly, sucking on his finger once again and whispering softly, “Mm… Yes, like that… Get yourself allready for me. Show me how much you want me.”
Now panting slightly, Fred gripped his cock and pumped up and down quickly, getting himself all hard for you. His cute face was starting to get all red.
You held back a giggle as put on your softest voice, to ask him, “Tell me the truth: Are you thinking of me?”
Fred nodded – but it was a casual, brief nod.
“You are? You’re thinking of me?”
Fred nodded again – too quickly for your taste.
“And nothing but me?” you pressed.
Fred groaned, as he pumped his cock in his hand, but he nodded again, and more earnestly this time.
“Yeah?” you said, slowly and subtly encouraging him. “Are you picturing how you’re going to take me? How you’re going to make love to me? How you’re going to fuck me until you make me yours?”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Fred huffed out, now fisting his cock furiously. “Gonna fuck you so hard, baby. You’re gonna be mine.” His voice became a deep growl on the last word.
“Mmm. And you’re going to cum in me, aren’t you?”
“Yes baby, I’m gonna cum hard in your pussy,” Fred moaned, now nodding non-stop.
“Okay,” you whispered softly. “I’d say you deserve some pussy now. Yes?”
“Yes,” Fred stressed, impatient. He opened his eyes and stared at you hungrily, his pupils blown wide with lust. He croaked out, “Now. Please.”
You smiled. “All right.” You slowly stripped your skirt off. As you did, you murmured, “Fred, you’re so gorgeous. Did you know that? I think you’re so handsome when you’re all flushed for me.”
“You do…?” Fred whispered, and his voice was hoarse. He watched you as you tossed your skirt to the side.
“Of course,” you said soothingly. Next, you slipped your fingers under the tiny slips of fabric lying over your hips and began to shimmy your panties down, little by little, until you revealed that you were wearing your little heart butt plug for him again.
Fred moaned audibly when he saw your little plug.
You lifted your legs a little, to show it off, and as you did, you whispered tellingly, “Oh, and Fred? I was wearing this all day today. Do you know why?”
Fred stared at your cute little ass and plug. Rather foolishly, he blurted out, “No.”
“Because I missed you,” you confessed. “As soon as I came back, I put my plug in, because it means that I’m… yours.”
“You’re mine? That’s what it means?” Fred reached out and pressed his finger against the plug.
“Ah…” You breathed out softly. “Yes, Fred…”
“Fuck,” Fred muttered, “that’s cute as hell.”
You let one of your hands fall on top of his knee and you gently stroked his knee as you murmured, in a sweet, low voice, “Now, come here.” As you spoke, you opened up your legs, to make room for Fred. The heart-shaped nestled between in your pert ass glittered in the light as you pushed your thighs apart.
Fred kept staring at that little heart, until his mouth fell open.
Godric, he looks like such an idiot, you thought lovingly. Oh, Fred. You tapped on his knee again, to wake him up. “What are you doing? Come be with me.”
Fred shuffled forward on his knees. You nearly laughed out loud at how awkward he looked. He almost looks shy, you thought, and you felt so very fond of this sweet, naïve version of Fred.
However, when Fred was closer, he had no hesitation whatsoever in spreading his large, warm hands on your thighs and pinning them down immediately against the bed. Your breath escaped you as you suddenly felt yourself being held down against the bed.
Ah, traitor, you thought in your head, he always does this. He looks all pathetic and pitiful, and then as soon as he’s close enough to take control, he suddenly does his damned best to do so.
With your thighs so obviously split open by Fred, now your pussy was there for Fred to see – already glistening and all pink and – and – You felt embarrassed for a split second and nearly covered yourself with your hands. But you caught yourself and whispered in your head, Don’t get carried away now.
Sure enough, Fred said knowingly, “Well, look at that. Wet already? You little slut. You did miss me.”
You scowled slightly.
Fred smirked. “And here you were, making me think that I needed you more than you needed me, and that your little ‘plug’ speech was just so you could use me to get yours.”
You muttered, “Who said anything about needing anyone? Now, get on with it.”
“Godric, look at you, getting all shy.” Fred was fully teasing you now.
You glared at Fred, and he grinned back. He said cheekily, “You nearly got me, love. Nearly. But now I know. You weren’t just luring me in and playing me like a chump. No, you meant every word of what you said, didn’t you? I mean – look at you, laid out in bed like this, dressed up in some fancy new lingerie, (Fred tugged at the strap of your bra, and you indignantly pushed his hand away) wearing your cute little heart plug (Fred pressed it again, making you suddenly moan rather too softly for your taste), and with your pussy all wet for me (Fred touched you between your legs, pressing his fingers right up against your pussy, and you hurriedly grabbed his hand and stared up at him with desperate, wanting eyes). Merlin, you need me. That’s what this is all about, isn’t it? Telling me that you need me bad.”
A wicked glint appeared in your eye. However, you pretended to relent. “Sure, Fred. I’m wet for you. I told you, you look so handsome. I can’t help myself – when you’re in bed with me, I get all wet.”
Fred suddenly sat up a little taller, with his shoulders back and his chest puffed out slightly.
Oh, look at him, all proud of himself, you snickered in your head. He’s so cute. You reached down and gently grasped his cock in your hand. It’s like he doesn’t remember what a whiny little puppy he becomes as soon as he’s inside me. Well, I can remind him of that.
Fred hissed slightly, as you let your hand run up and down his length. Slowly, you guided Fred’s cock to your pussy and slid the tip of his cock up and down against your wet slit. “‘I’m a complete, heartbroken slut for you. Is that what you want to hear?” You grasped his cock harder and jerked your hand up and down as you whispered rapidly – “Sir?”
“Fuck,” Fred moaned, and his hands slid up your thighs and onto your waist and he squeezed your waist, making you suddenly huff.
“Fuck,” Fred repeated. “Call me that again, baby. And hold still – ‘cause I’m - ” His voice gave out, and he huffed heavily as he suddenly felt all worked up over hearing you confess how much you wanted him and hearing you call him ‘sir.’
You nearly slipped and gave into your desire in that moment, which was to push Fred’s cock inside of you as fast as you could, because Merlin knew that that was what you wanted. You were a slut for him. But you made yourself stop, with Fred’s cock barely pressed to your pussyhole, and you murmured quietly, “But you ought to know one thing, sir -”
“W-What’s that?” Fred panted out.
You toyed with Fred’s cock, rubbing it against your pussyhole gently, but never letting him slip inside. “No matter how much I need you, you’re always going to need me more.”
“Well, I don’t know ‘bout that,” Fred protested, even as he squirmed with how badly he wanted to be inside you now. “I’d like to – baby, please, just put it in – to think we’re even.”
“Even?” You slowly shook your head up at him. “No, we’re not even.”
“Damn it, are you trying to be mean again?” Fred huffed out, with his hands in fists now as you kept dragging the tip of his cock up and down your pussyhole, without actually taking him in.
“I’m never mean.”
“You are, and if you can’t see it – baby, for fuck’s sake, take me in – if you – uhn – if you can’t see it, it’s only because it’s your default.”
“No,” you corrected him, speaking softly. “If you think I’m mean, it’s only because you’re being stupid, Fred.”
“I’m not stupid,” Fred said at once, sounding almost sullen.
“Well, then, willfully ignorant, which is worse,” you said flippantly. “But I’ll show you.”
“Show me what?” Fred said, now getting quite annoyed with you.
You stroked Fred’s cock in your hand again, as you answered, “How badly you need me.”
Fred groaned. Your hand felt so good wrapped around his cock, but he knew that your pussy would feel even better. Merlin, why isn’t she taking me in? I need to be inside her. Just look at her little pussy, all wet and waiting. Fuck, please!
“Just – Just – Can’t we do that some other time?” Fred huffed, trying desperately to swallow down his impatience.
However, you added fuel to the fire by looking up at him and innocently shaking your head. “Can’t, Fred,” you replied matter-of-factly. “Now’s the only convenient time. See, unlike you, I have real tasks to attend to after I play with you. I’ve got to go study, for one, and then I have prefect duties, and then I have to fold my laundry – and I like to line up all my socks before I roll them up all daintily with my hands - ”
Fred growled, “Listen here, you – you demon - ” But just then, you pushed in simply the tip of his cock inside of you.
Mmm, you moaned in your head.
Fred let out a soft whimper and he shook his head, completely disarmed by how good you felt squeezing around his cock, even if it was just the tip.
“Uhn…” Fred breathed out. “Mmm, yeah. Now deeper, baby, c’mon.”
“Fred, say you need me,” you whispered enticingly. “And mean it.”
Fred let out a pained groan. “S-Stop teasing me.”
But you shifted upwards, and you let the tip of Fred’s cock slip out of your pussy.
Fred groaned. “Baby, where are you going? C’mon, please - ”
You shook your head up at him. “First, admit how much you need me - ”
“All right, fine, I need you , I really fucking need you,” he suddenly reeled out. “C’mon – fuck – stop teasing me.”
You checked your grin as you replied, in a voice as light and soft as feathers, and in a tone that seemed so regretful, “Oh, Fred, you were so close, but you just weren’t sincere enough - ”
“Bloody hell!” Fred cursed at you. “What’s your prob - ?”
You put your finger up to his mouth, cutting him off. “Shush, no cursing.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Fred was nearly shaking all over, and his cock was so hard, it was almost painful.
You pretended not to notice as you sighed and said, in a disappointed voice, “Can’t pay attention, I see. Can’t even give his girlfriend ten seconds of his focus.”
“I swear to God - ” Fred growled, but you only smushed your hand against his mouth again, and more definitely this time.
“Dwevil,” Fred protested, against you and your hand.
“Fine. I’ll make my point another way.” You locked eyes with Fred and smiled pleasantly at him. "I was going to let you have me for as long as you wanted tonight, but I changed my mind." Then, you announced, in a voice that promised pleasure that was to die for, “I’m going to make you cum in three minutes, Fred Weasley."
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