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#bc at the end of the day they have seniority and I need to keep this job
anifever · 2 days
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Dating Darry Curtis HC’s ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆
Darrel “Darry” Curtis x Fem!Reader
୨୧ : What I think dating ‘Superman’ would include
A/N : I’ve been busy but school’s out now so hopefully I can work on requests 💔. Also ily Jake Gyllenhaal but they should’ve never remade Roadhouse..
˖⁺‧₊˚ 🕊️ ˚₊‧⁺˖
୨ I hate to say it (not really), but you’re like a married couple
୨ The gang calls you mom and dad as a joke
୨ You guys are so sitting on a porch with wind chimes and birds chirping in the bg and the warmth of the sun hitting your skin coded
୨ You’re so disgustingly in love and it makes everyone sick
୨ I feel like bcs of how he’s portrayed and the responsibilities/stress he takes on from the entire gang, it makes him seem way older than he is
୨ That’s also probably due to Patrick Swayze being 31 instead of 20 while filming and also being 15 years older than C Thomas Howell irl instead of the 6 year age gap their characters actually had…
୨ Anyways, you help him actually act more his age
୨ You convince him to go out more, etc
୨ Everyone’s happy to see him let loose once in a while
୨ Like you guys mess around when you bake/cook together by throwing flour at each other and giggling omg I’m vomiting
୨ You guys are sometimes (very rarely) even spotted at Buck’s together and Dallas has to do a double take
୨ You also bribe the boys to give you guys or just him in general some alone time LMAO
୨ You absolutely slow dance in the kitchen. Idc.
୨ He’s the type to call you “a real treat” when you dress up or do something nice for him
୨ Going shopping together and him walking around with his lil’ glasses reading the grocery list while you push the cart
୨ Sitting in his lap while he reads the newspaper ohahahwbrbrbnrne
୨ You guys definitely met early on; slow burn
୨ You were SO ‘So High School’ by Taylor Swift when you were a little bit younger
୨ Been in the works of writing a ff abt that..
୨ FINALLY officially asked you out senior year for prom and you’ve been together since, even though you guys were in love way before that
୨ You definitely have to get in between his and Pony’s fights a lot
୨ Soda comes to you for advice, no matter what it is- he thinks it’s refreshing to have someone new to talk to rather than constant arguing, yada yada
୨ Dallas either flirts with you to piss Darry off or he has a relationship with you like he did with Mrs. Curtis. No in between.
୨ The type of man to give you foot massages
୨ On the contrary, you also massage his shoulders
୨ Johnny probably had a tiny crush on you when you first met him years back, but it went away when you guys started dating
୨ Went away to an extent at least..
୨ Him standing between your legs while you’re sat on the sink shaving his face for him GODODODODID
୨ He says “honey, I’m home” unironically
୨ He’s able to pick you up pretty easily no matter your weight
୨ He does it a lot and it’s mainly to show off LMAO
୨ You guys play checkers together and genuinely enjoy it which doesn’t help your mom/dad allegations
୨ EXTREMELY good at calming you down whether it’s a panic attack, etc
୨ He might lose his temper a lot on his brothers, but he never does it with you
୨ If he ever does accidentally snap at you, he apologizes to no end
୨ He’s touching you whenever he can; a hand on your waist, around your shoulder, keeping you on his lap, a finger in your belt loop, etc
୨ Speaking of belt loops, you pulling him in by the loops or his belt buckle to kiss him⁉️⁉️⁉️ I’m losing it
୨ Whenever any sort of errand needs to be run, he either forces Pony/Soda to do it, or makes you come with him alone
୨ He buys you flowers whenever he has the extra money ☹️
୨ Has his moms wedding ring kept someplace safe to give to you one day
୨ On another note, she loved you so much before she passed
୨ She was also constantly teasing him about you two when you guys were younger
୨ If he’s exhausted from work and flops onto the couch with you, don’t expect to be getting up anytime soon
୨ Back to the ‘him going out more’ point- you guys go to rodeos together whenever he knows Pony is being watched by someone else
୨ Calming lil’ picnics together by a lake
୨ He unfortunately will have to cancel plans a good amount because of work-related stuff, but you completely understand
୨ He’s pretty stubborn about letting you help with money, but he gives in sometimes
୨ You leave him cute notes in the lunch that he takes to work <\\3
୨ He for sure keeps a hand on your thigh or knee while driving
୨ There’s no doubt in my mind you’d grow old together
୨ He’s thankful for you in so many ways and is glad you’re able to help his life feel normal again and like an actual 20 year-old
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monsterhugger · 2 years
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literally want to scream at my coworkers to answer the phone themselves
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eddiesxangel · 6 months
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Redemption| Eddie Munson x Reader
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Summary: Eddie is forced to work community hours for a petty crime at a retirement home; what he didn’t expect was the pretty girl at the front desk, you. This is so self-indulgent don't come for me
Word count: 3.8k
Cw: mutual pining, male masturbation, Perv!Eddie, Dom!Eddie/ Sub!reader, unprotected sex, corruption kink? breeding kink, sex at work. (Briefly proofread)
An: after 85 years I finally got around to finishing this! It’s not where I thought it would go originally bc it was just suppose to be a fluff piece but the horny gremlin took over
Boredom wasn't even a way to describe how you were feeling. The phones were dead, the day had been dragging on, and it was not even 12:00pm. The residents of the home were also not doing you any favours. Having to repeat yourself about six times in a row at the top of your lungs was starting to get old; your day had just not been going the way you wanted. Any other day, you'd be happy to help, happy to repeat yourself, but today was not one of those days. You were irritated and annoyed; your work bestie was off today, so you couldn't even complain to her about your shit day.
 A sigh of relief fills you when the phone rings, a rare occasion, but today has been so slow you were begging for something to do.
 "Sunny Acres Retirement Home! How may I help you?"  your customer service voice was overly sweet, too sweet. However you can't seem to turn it off, being the people pleaser that you are. 
"Jesus Christ'' You hear mumbled from the other end of the line. 
"Hello? How can I help you?" you roll your eyes, having to repeat yourself, but keep up the chipper act.
 "Yeah, listen, I was assigned to do community hours at this place, and I need to talk to a manager." Damn, this guy had an attitude. 
"Yeah! Sure thing. Can I get your name, please?"
 "Seriously?" 
What the fuck crawled up this guy's ass?
"It's company policy, Sir." You rolled your eyes again, not wanting to deal with more bullshit.
"Eddie"  
"One moment, Eddie, I'll transfer your call." You put him on hold and transferred him to the manager with a good luck warning. 
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The next day, you were in much better spirits; your work bestie was with you, it was casual Friday, and you were allowed to wear jeans instead of business casual attire.
It was around 1:00pm when you saw Chief Hopper walk in accompanied by someone you had not recognized. 
"Hey Hopps," you greet him with a smile.
"Hey, you." He said with a smile.
You and Chief Hopper had a friendly relationship because you're close friends with his girlfriend's oldest, Jonathan.  
"To what do we owe the pleasure?"
"Brought in another delinquent for you to roughhouse into shape" he steps out of the way.
Your giggle dies as you lock eyes with the prettiest boy you've ever seen. 
"This is Edward; he is here to complete two hundred hours of community service, and he will be starting today."
"It's Eddie," you hear him mumble under his breath. 
Oh so this is the jackass you spoke to on the phone yesterday... a really cute jackass.
He looked to be around your age, but you didn't recognize him. You'd only been in town since the second half of senior year, hating your parents for making your move to a new school so close to graduating. You have been in Hawkins  six years now you're here working 9-5 as a receptionist at Sunny Acres Retirement Home.
"Nice to meet you, Eddie." You introduce yourself and proceed to call the manager to let her know he is here. Once Hopper leaves and your manager shows him around, you immediately call your best friend, Robin's, extension.
"Get over here now! We have a code, hottie," you whisper into the phone. Whenever you see a cute person enter the building, whether it be adult grandchildren, paramedics, or firefighters, you always let one another know when there is one on the premises. No less than two minutes later, she approaches your desk.
"Where are they?"
" There," you point to the dining room directly across from your desk as he is being given a tour of the building.
"Eddie Munson?!" she half yells before covering her mouth. 
"You know him?" you ask excitedly.
"Know him? He's the town freak," she scoffs.
"I'm sure he is a freak, alright?" You wiggle your brows at her." 
"I'm serious! He's bad news." 
"Clearly, he is doing community service hours." 
"Seriously? That is what you're into?" she giggles.
"I don't know? There is something about him?" You bite your lip as you check him out from afar. He turns back to walk towards you, and you quickly look away, not wanting to be caught.
You've always been into bad boys, but your golden retriever, good girl image, always scared them away.
Eddie notices you staring at him because you're not very subtle.  He isn't mad that he caught you staring because he felt that you were checking him out rather than judging him. Unlike your co-worker standing beside you...
Just his luck, he recognized Robin from high school. She was always neutral towards him and didn't say much, but he knew how the people in this town operated. She would turn you against him in no time.
"Buckley." He nodded.
"Munson," she mimicked back.
You watched the scene play out, hoping she would introduce you. Wrong. She goes straight in for the kill.
"My friend thinks you're cute." She points her thumb at you, and you immediately slap her shoulder as a gut reaction.
"Robin?!" you scold her. Mortified about what she admitted to him just to break an awkward silence, you feel like you want the ground to swallow you whole. 
Eddie gives you a cocky smirk before the manager comes back to continue with the tour. 
"Why do you hate me? Did I do something?  Are you punishing me?" you whine. 
"You know I just blurt out things when I get uncomfortable!" 
All you can do is roll your eyes, you loved the girl, but she could be really dense. 
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Eddie couldn't stop thinking about your brief interaction all night. Was Robin telling the truth? Did you really think he was cute? Or was she teasing? He hoped that she had grown up since high school and was telling the truth because he also thought you were cute, like really, really cute. He hadn't seen you before, and Hawkins was a small town; he must have known you from somewhere? He wraps his brain around any memories of your face, but he comes up empty. He had to find out more about you. He needed to know you. Something about you infatuated him so much. He thought about how your body looked in the adorable outfit you had on. He thought about what was under the outfit to... Maybe being forced to volunteer his time at Sunny Acres wouldn't be the worst thing that happened to him after all...
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The next day, you were assigned to show Eddie some of the duties he was to do for the residents. Talk to them, run bingo, help them with their phone if the line was giving them any trouble, or their TV if they put in the wrong input, serve them beverages, and get to know them and keep them company. A lot of them don't have families or anyone to come visit them. The staff are their family. That was the main reason you stayed at this job for so long. 
Eddie was quiet the whole orientation. The tension from yesterday was so thick you could cut it with a knife. Small talk was not your strong suit; you dreaded it, but you also really wanted to talk with Eddie, so you went for it.
"So what did they book you for? Steal candy from a kid on the playground?" trying to make light of the situation. 
"Murder," he deadpans to you.
"Ha ha. Nice try. They don't give community hours to murderers." you couldn't keep your eyes on the task in front of you.
He was dead silent, but you could feel his eyes burning into you.
"Okay, don't tell me; I'll just keep guessing until you do." you gave a cheeky smile, trying to lighten the mood. 
Another eye roll was shot your way, but you swore you saw a glint of something behind those eyes. 
"So what was it? Trespassing? Vandalism? shoplifting? Public intoxication? Speeding?" you raise a brow at him.
 Eddie just smirked and shook his head as you interrogated him. Your bubbly personality was nothing compared to his. He noticed how you would light up the room when you walked in. The residents of the home adored you, and he could see why. You were one of the prettiest girls he had ever seen; your eyes sparkled, and he loved how you styled yourself. He wasn't used to being so infatuated by someone so cutesy. He noticed you wore a lot of pink and has yet to see you in anything black. He thought of what you would look like with black underwear... then he snapped back out of his thoughts. He tried to think of something less sexy, but as he was trying to do so, your top slipped down when you went to reach for the deck of cards across from you. He caught a glimpse of the frilly light yellow bra you had on under your top.
Eddie noticed the room was getting hotter, or was that just him? You made him nervous; he didn't want to embarrass himself in front of you more than he already has. He felt shame that we had to be waltzed in here by the chief of police, never mind what offence he committed. So he stayed quiet, not wanting the next thing to come out of his mouth to be offensive or crass. So he kept quiet, not saying anything or indulging in the conversation more than he had to.
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Another week went by, and you still hardly spoke to Eddie. Work was unbelievably slow yet again. you thought that would give you a chance to speak with Eddie, but you hardly had time to see him because the residents kept hogging him. That was until your manager asked for you to help with the Bingo because everyone decided to show up today. Eddie was in charge of rolling and placing, and you were in charge of announcing and checking.
This was it, this was your chance to speak to him...
"How do you like it here so far?"
"It's fine I guess." He mumbled. 
"Everyone really loves you." You smiled.  
Eddie gave you a look that said what the fuck?
“No really! … Do you not like it here?” What you were really asking was do you not like being around me?
"Don't you get it? How can I serve these snotty rich people when all they do is look down on someone like me?"
"Eddie, are you blind? The residents love you." 
Eddie scoffs at your confession. "I'm serious! When you are gone, Pat always asks where you are! And Linda always refers to you as her boyfriend, and I overheard Martha and June arguing over who got to braid your hair next. You're a real ladies' man around here," You giggle. 
"A ladies man you say?" his mood slowly changes as he smirks at you. That made you blush, the heat rose to your cheeks as you looked away bashfully. He was just so pretty… and the way he looked at you like how he is now is making you so shy.
"Yeah, I'm kinda jealous of Linda, if I'm honest." You flirt. You feel like your stomach was in your ass by the time you finished the sentence.
-
"What's the next number! come on!" Bob yelled from the table. You had completely forgotten about the game.
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Small glances were stolen throughout the following weeks.  You would feel the heat rise to your cheeks every time he caught you, and you couldn't tell if he found it endearing or annoying. You never got a response out of Eddie after your admission to being jealous over an eighty-three-year-old.
Eddie definitely thought it was endearing and he can't seem to get you out of his head. He would think about you when he was alone in his room at night. He would think about how you always smelled like marshmallows, how your hair looked so cute with the little bow you put in it occasionally, or how you tease him by wearing those short skirts with stockings underneath. He knew you were teasing him. Everyone else bought the Goodie Two Shoes act, but not Eddie. He saw right through it, and he was fed up. He felt like if he didn't have you, he would actually explode.
Eddie had been watching you from afar this whole time. He would sneak around your desk, finding things he could take home with him as a keepsake. Like little doodles you would leave out, or the pen you were using, or your lip balm. The best was when you left your purse out, and he got a chance to take the travel-size perfume that was lying there on top of everything. There was a reason he got booked for defacing public property and not theft. Theft he was good at.
Eddie sprayed his pillow with your perfume and then used your lip balm that smelled and tasted like strawberries, fuck, everything about you was so sweet: your personality, looks and smell, even your fucking lip balm. He thought about how his lips were touching the thing that touched yours as he applied it to his own, and his dick got hard. Then he thought about how your strawberry lips would look around his hard cock.
You were taking over Eddie's senses as he began to tug at his cock. He thought about how he would love to flip up your skirt and fucking you in one of the empty rooms. His imagination ran wild. He thought about your voice, how your tits would look bouncing in that frilly yellow bra he got a peek at. He wanted you in every position, especially under him. He knew you would be the perfect little sub for him. He needed you to be; he was so close to cumming. He thought about you crying from how much you needed his cock to fill you. He thought about how good you would look and feel swallowing his cock. He needed to take what he thought, no needed to believe, was your virgin pussy.
Eddie came so hard that night, the first night he indulged in his fantasies of you with your smell lingering in the air of his room. The mix of your sent with his was too much. He needed you, and he would do anything to try and get you.
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"Ok, I can't��take this anymore, you need to talk to him." Robin shook her head. 
"And say what?" 
"Yo Munson, come here!" 
"Robin!" You scolded.  
As Eddie approached, you felt your heart rate go up; you could hear the blood pumping in your ears. What on earth was she going to say now? 
"Okay, I can't take watching you two dance around one another any longer." "She thinks you're cute. Okay..." Robin gestured to you. "Do you think she is cute?"
Eddie didn’t say anything, he just slowly nodded his head.
The tension broke when the shrill of phone ring broke you out of your trance and shook you a little. You just stared at the phone and Robin butted in.
“I’ll take it, you take your lunch” she gave you a wink and you looked to Eddie.
“I could eat.” and he wasn't talking about the chicken they were serving for lunch.
You felt your stomach do a flip-flip; you heard the insinuation in his tone.
"Um, uh- yeah. Okay." You cleared your throat and went to find an empty room for some privacy.
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You guided Eddie up to the eighth floor. There were a lot of vacant rooms up there, and hardly anyone went in the west wing since no one was living there yet. The elevator ride up was silent; you felt an awkwardness, like Eddie was looking into your soul even though he wasn't even looking at you... The elevator dinged, and Eddie let you step out first, guiding him to the privacy he yearned for.
809 Eddie read on the door as you fumbled with the lock and key. Finally, you opened the lock and guided him inside. The room was completely empty; it echoed a little as your footsteps filled it.
"So..." You started but Eddie had no time for talking. He wanted you and he wanted you now.
Eddie surprised you by cupping your face and kissing you passionately. No one had ever kissed you like this before; it was strong and hard but also careful.
"You have no idea what you do to me, sweetheart." He spoke into your mouth. The kissing got more and more sensual. You ran your hands up his middle before you knew what was happening he quickly turned you around and pressed you up against the wall.
"You think it's cute? Teasing me for weeks with your sweet little outfits?" Eddie's hand was wrapped around your mouth to keep you quiet as his fingers explored you meat of your ass.
"Mmmmmph" You were so scared someone would find you in the empty suite, but it also turned you on more than expected.
"What was that sweetheart? I didn't quite catch that?" His fingers found the waistband of your stockings and pulled them and your panties down with one swift motion. His hand loosened its grip on your jaw so you could speak.
"N-no," You whimpered. This was turning you on way more than it should. You thought you would come up here to talk; maybe he would ask you out on a date. You never thought you would be fucking!
"I don't believe you."
You felt your skirt flipped up and a cool breeze on your wet pussy.
"Tell me, sweetheart, has anyone ever filled this pussy?" Eddie asked as he ran a single finger through your wet folds.
"Yes," You admit shakily. You gripped Eddie's wrist of the hand that was clamped around your throat.
Eddie can't say he was surprised that you’ve had men before him. You were beautiful, smart, funny, adorable. It's too bad you had to be with them before he got a taste.
"What a shame you've had to suffer through that before meeting me, babydoll."
"Why is that?" you ask bravely.
Eddie chuckled darkly... "Because baby, I'm about to ruin you for all men."
That made you gulp. You can't believe you were about to fuck your crush in the middle of the work day. You didn't do stuff like this! you were a good girl, a rule follower.
Before you could think anymore about the consequences, Eddie, he slipped his throbbing cock into your needy pussy.
"Holy fuck!" You screamed, and Eddie's hand clamped back down over your mouth to keep you quiet.
Just when Eddie didn't think you could get any hotter, the curse word you let slip from your mouth made his cock twitch inside of you.
"Fuck me, you stretch me out so good," You whine, and Eddie thinks he will bust a nut right then and there. His perfect little angel had the mouth of a whore.
"Yes, you like that, don't you, you dirty little slut." Eddie jerked his hips up into you. It was sharp and hard and hit that delicious spot inside you each time. “You wanna be my good girl? Or my bad girl?”
“Good- oh fuck- good girl. I want to be your good girl!”
“That shut the fuck up and take it like I know you can”
"oh my god, you're so big." Your eyes rolled back into your head as he became more controlled with his rhythm. His hands gripped your hip, and he wrapped his hand in your hair, yanking your head back like he was riding you.
The view Eddie had was your ass bounced off his cock was making his head spin. He knew you would hand a perfect pussy. It was his now and only his.
"This pussy is mine now, understand? Im going to fill this pussy so good you won't know what to do for days. The only thing you're going to be thinking of is me and my fat cock."
All you could do was moan in response. "Yea you like that you dirty little whore. You like that I own this pussy now…” Eddie slowed down, he rolled his hips slowly into your pussy and he swore he saw the light “You have everyone convinced you're a goodgirl but all you are is a cumslut. Tell me how much you want my cum coating your walls"
"I want it so bad!" you cried.
You've never had a dick like this before. Eddie was right, he's ruined you for all men and he hadn't even made you cum... yet. You had full faith that he was able to do so because you could feel it. The warm fuzzy feeling was bubbling up in your core. Eddie had picked up the pace at your omission, and fuck if he wasn’t hitting your g spot with each delicious stroke of his cock hitting your walls.
"Fuck I'm going to cum!" You scream, all caution thrown to the wind, you'd forgotten where you were. The only thing you could think of was Eddie and his delicious cock.
"Fuck yes, babydoll. Come on this cock." Eddie's hand let go of your hair and wrapped it around your throat, pulling you flush to his body.
"More" You whisper.
"Greedy greedy girl."
"Please" You begged. You needed him to touch you.
"There is my good girl." His hand that had gripped your hip slid down and started playing with your swollen clit and your legs almost gave out.
"Next time, I'm keeping my word, and I'm going to eat this pretty little pussy." Eddie growled.
That did it for you; your inner walls squeezed, and you felt your orgasm rush through you. Eddie trusted in you as your body convulsed around him.
"Fuck you're so fucking tight," Eddie grits through his teeth, and he fights off his impending orgasm. He doesn't want this moment to end, he wants it to last forever. What if this is the last chance he has to feel your pussy wrapped around him?
"Please, Eddie, I want your cum! I want your cum so fucking bad, my pussy needs it."
That did it for Eddie, he let go and his hot seed was being shot into you with a roar.
After minutes of silence and heavy breathing, Eddie bent down and pulled up your panties and stockings for you, trapping his cum with it. You turn slowly, afraid to look him in the eyes, but Eddie doesn't allow it. He brings your cin up, guiding your eyes to look into his.
"Don't shy away from me now, babydoll. You're going to go back down to the lobby and finish the rest of your work day knowing my cum is going to be seeping through your pretty little panties, ok?" He ordered, and you dumbly nodded your head, still fucked out by the amazing dick you just received.
"Good girl" Eddie patted your ass, and you walked to the elevator with wobbly legs. Eddie laughed and held you stand straight before letting go before you reached the first floor.
You returned from your break fifteen minutes later than allotted, but Robin covered for you. You couldn't even look her in the eyes, and she knew you got freaky with the freak of Hawkins.
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loveneversleepss · 16 days
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TROPE SERIES: Lee know
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Brothers best friend
requested by @aakamiLee on wattpad
Pairing: enemy!Lee know x female reader
Trope: enemies to lovers, fake dating
Warnings: cursing, bickering, mean and nice nicknames, time jumps (bc im lazy), smut, protected sex (we're responsible for once), unprotected sex (Oopsie), oral sex, betrayal, yelling?
w.c: 10 k
~
There's a big difference between love and hate. Who you love and care for are forever in your heart, you'll follow them to the end of the earth. But hatred, it's made out of pure evil. It sinks into you until you can't push it out anymore. You deal with it in ways that aren't right. Until, you accept it. Make peace with it. Then that's when it goes away.
I guess that's why villains or enemies are seen as more powerful and better. Attractive sometimes too. Because they've made peace of their hate. They're gonna use it to fire themselves into getting what they want. Because they're not afraid. They'd let the world burn for what they love. Meanwhile hero will sacrifice what they love to save the world. And you'd choose the villain every time.
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If there's anyone you have a strong hatred for, it's Lee know. Ever since you were a child, he had it out for you to embarrass you and tease you at any moment he could. On the way you'd dress, the way you talked, or the way you walked. He would say something about it. You didn't know what or why he always would make fun of you. What could possibly possess him to do that?
"Wow, y/n. Could you get anymore dorkier? Look at what you're wearing," he'd snicker.
There was never a moment he would spare you, or do anything to prove he was good. He was a bully, an enemy and you would never side with him. You promised that to yourself. But you'd hate to admit, he's gorgeous. Breath taking.
But there was one person who was disgusted by him and hated him even more than you did. Hyunjin. Your knight in shining armor. He was even more beautiful than Lee know.
"I know you're not talking with those tight jeans, Lee know." He came by your side and defended you. Lee know looked embarrassed on the spot.
You were thankful for him. You survived Lee knows bullying tactics thanks to him. He was your best friend all your childhood years. But he had to leave. You knew it wouldn't last. But you had hoped it would. The last day of elementary school, you dreaded it and wished it didn't come. But it did, and he moved away after that day.
"Don't worry, y/n. I'll come back for you, I will never forget my best friend." He hugged you tight and he whispered sweetly to you, "promise me you'll wait? Promise that you'll never have another boy at your side, I'm the only one for you." And you intended to keep that promise.
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How the years fly by. Senior year. Graduation. This is the final year. The final time to experience everything you possibly can. And you will.
"Y/n!" You heard your name being called by your brother, Chan. He's practically legend at your school. He graduated a year ago. At your school, you have a record of seniors who experienced things no one else has before. He accomplished to host all senior parties. How does one even manage that?
You made your way down the stairs in your pajamas. "What?" You yelled back and made your way to the kitchen. "We're going out, don't burn down the house, and don't go anywhere." He said in a busy tone as he texted in his phone. You saw Leeknow standing next to Chan and you glanced at him confused. "Since when were you two friends? You don't even go to our school anymore, Chan." Chan made eye contact with Lee know and back to you. "Because I'm actually cool, unlike you, lil sis. I have friends and you so desperately need to get out more." He slipped away before you could answer and you glared in his direction.
You turned your focus back on Lee know as stared at you with a smirk. "Cute pjs," he joked and you rolled your eyes. "Well excuse me that I don't look like a supermodel in the morning." He seemed amused and leaned over the table, "it's noon and Saturday. Why don't you go out with us, huh? Get put of your comfort zone, gain a social life or something." You scoffed and took a couple steps closer, "I have a life and friends. I don't need to be drinking and partying all the time." He straightened his body up and crossed his arms, "name one friend you have." He was skeptical of you, you have to admit. Making friends is not an easy task for you.
"Hyunjin," you said confidently. He laughed practically in your face. "That loser? He moved away a long time ago, it's time you move on sweetheart." You were done with the conversation and flipped him off as you walked away. He rushed to stop you, leaning against the wall before the stairs. "Come on, get ready. It'll be fun." That's all you need. To attend a party with your mortal enemy.
"No thanks." You shinned a fake smile at him and you walked up the stairs. "Jeez what a loner," he mumbled and you looked down at your pajamas. Suddenly feeling self conscious. Maybe you should start going out more. You stopped mid way on the stairs and he had begun to walk away. "Do you really think it would be fun?" He turned back around and rose an eyebrow mischievously. "Yes, it would." He crossed his arms, you immediately noticed his veins and the tone of his muscles appearing. You have to admit, if he wasn't your mortal enemy, you would find him attractive.
He followed your eye path to his arms and cleared his throat. "Just go get ready loser." You frowned and continued going up the stairs and got ready.
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You peaked around the corner and saw him leaning against the wall in the kitchen, waiting for you. "Yeah, Chan. It's fine I can take her. I'll be there soon." He hung up and you cleared your throat. He turned his attention up to you and smiled slightly, you began to walk down the steps with a slight shyness. He slowly made his way towards you and... He wolf whistles at you.
"Okay, ew." You rose your hand and made a face of disgust. He smiled. "It's just nice to see you actually try to fit in for once." The backhanded compliment hit you in the face like a truck. You huffed and crossed your arms, "why can't you just say I look pretty? You don't have to insult me." His expression dropped and his eyes softened, "okay I'm sorry. You look pretty." The Lee know apologizing for once in his life? You're shocked and frankly, scared. He must want something. "Okay now you're being strangely nice, what is it that you want? Girls? Money?"
He smirked as he looked down at your hands. "Did I maybe convince you to go out with me out of jealousy that I would get with a girl?" He slowly moved to the first step as you walked down to him. How the hell did he come to that conclusion? Delusional. "Are you jealous, little y/n?" He leaned against the wall. You laughed in disbelief and crossed your arms. "Of course not, no, I'm not jealous." He smirked and licked his lips, "Uh huh." He sighed heavily, "Just admit it, you're in love with me." You mock a laugh at him, "Um, no."
He raises an eyebrow at you, "Is that so?" He steps closer to you, almost toppling over you, "even when I do this?" He places a lock of your hair behind your ear and stares into your eyes, you try to ignore the heart beating fast in your chest. "Just leave me alone, jerk!" He laughs softly to himself as you push him away. "You're hot when you're mad." You narrow your eyes at him with annoyance as you walk away. He always does things like that just to get you flustered, you should be able to say you're used to it but you're not. He makes you nervous and barely able to stand when he touches you. You don't know why he has that effect on you but he does. And you hate yourself for it.
~~~
You'd never would've imagined in a hundred years that you would be in a car with Lee Know right now. It's frightening really. "So, what is all good about that Hyunjin guy? You seem to be in love with him or something." You rolled your eyes and continued looking out the window, "i'm not in love with him, he was just really nice to me." He scoffed and sat up straighter in his seat, "you're obsessed with him because he was nice to you? God, y/n, you really need to go to this party." You huffed and sat more back in the seat. You eventually arrived and heard the music booming in the distance, he parked neatly. But he hasn't motioned to leaving yet, awaiting your move. You always pondered a question and never had the guts to say it before to him, but you're feeling pretty bold right now.
"Why do you hate me?" You looked over your shoulder at him, he was clenching his jaw hard. "Who said I do?" He turned to look at you two, since when has he had that sparkle in his eyes? It's mesmerizing. He looked down to his water bottle in the cup holder and decided to take a sip. "Are you fucking with me?" He practically choked at your bluntness and hit his chest a couple times. "I mean you have made every single thing I've ever done incredibly hard and made fun of me every chance you could." He set down the water bottle and looked into your eyes once again, "it was the only way I could get your attention." You shook your head at him. "There are other ways of getting my attention, being mean is not one of them." You opened the door and slammed it shut in annoyance, he followed closely behind which annoyed you even more.
You walked into the party and realized, this is definitely not your element. "Scared, little one?" Lee know whispered into your ear. "Just not my element, can you get me something to drink?" He looked guilty all of a sudden and licked his smooth lips, "so uh. About what I said about you basically getting out of your comfort zone. Maybe drinking should not be one of them." You wanted so badly to beat him up. Rip him apart to shreds. "What? Come on, I need to unwind." You faced him now and shot puppy dog eyes at him, "pretty please?" He stayed silent for a while, just looking down at you. "Okay, I'll be back. Stay put."
Yeah, no way you're staying put. You took the opportunity when he left to explore around, leading into a den in the house. You became face to face with a man with long black hair, kissing a woman on the couch. You instantly recognized him, Hyunjin. He broke away from the kiss with an amused smile and the girl noticed you and stared with a judging look, he followed her gaze and laid eyes on you.
What. The. Fuck. "Y/n?" You turned away quickly and bumped into Lee knows silhouette, knocking your drink all over himself. "Ugh, dammit y/n." He noticed your face and immediately searched around for the cause. Lee Know's gaze locked from him to you and then back to him. His jaw tensed as he stared at them both and it clicked, that's also his ex girlfriend. Tears began to fill in your eyes, and he pulled you close. He led you to a bathroom far away from them. Tears fell down your cheeks, pooling your mind.
"Listen to me, y/n. Fuck them. He didn't deserve you anyways." You leaned against the sink as he desperately tried to wipe away your tears. You shook your head while sobbing, "I can't believe it, I was an idiot to love him. I wasted all this time waiting for him." Now he was shaking his head, "no, y/n. Don't think like that. He's the idiot and you should beat his ass for doing that to you." You sighed heavily and pushed him away by his stomach, wiping your own tears. "God, I wish you wouldn't see me like this. Please don't make fun of me for this."
He stayed silent. "God, you reek." You sat down on the closed toilet lid. He looked down to his shirt, "oh right. I forgot." He took of his jacket, wrapping it around your shoulders, and off his shirt went. Pulling it off his shoulders, and wetting it in the sink. You couldn't help staring at his sculpted physique, he was ripped. And there was one thing that stood out to you, a small scar located a little above his waist. It was so unique and beautiful, you wanted to trace along it. He noticed your staring, "what?"
You stood up and walked over to him, he froze as you stared down at his scar. He backed against the sink. You slowly raised your hand and touched his stomach, "it's pretty." You traced along it, his chest rising up and down as you slowly caressed it. "Y/n," he whispered softly and you looked up at him. His cheeks were slightly red and you instantly knew he felt embarrased. You yanked your hand away, "sorry." He shook his hand and mumbled a, "its fine."
He continued to try to wash away the alcohol from his shirt as you watched. "I'll wash this later." He drained it and you gave him his sweater back to cover him up. He paused before reaching for the door, he looked back at you, "do you wanna go home?" You nodded your head, "yeah. I wanna go home." He put his arm around you and led you outside, not once letting you astray from his grip. You hadn't noticed before, but people were staring at you, you heard faint whispers. "Who's that girl with Lee Know?" "She's pretty." "Wait I think that's Chan's little sister." You shook off their conversations, of course they were talking about you, you were with Mr. King of the parties. He opened the door for you and you were about to enter when you heard your name being called. You took a deep breath and turned to the culprit. "What do you want Hyunjin?"
"Just let me explain." You glanced at Lee Know and he nodded his head for you to put Hyunjin's ass on blast. "Explain what exactly. That you didn't have your tongue down her throat, while you told me to wait for you all these years and forbade me to have a boyfriend? Please, how much of a fucking loser are you to get someone's sloppy seconds?" Lee Know held in his laughter as he brought a fist to his mouth. He looked visibly proud of you. "Yeah, we're done here. Let's go."
You held the door to enter when he yelled out, "you think you're so fucking high and mighty don't you. You wanna pick out my relationship but not the one right here," he motioned at the two of you, "I mean come on y/n. He fucking made your life a living hell, don't you remember the times you cried in my arms about him, wishing that he would die?" You suddenly felt small, he exposed you bare and you couldn't deny it. Suddenly, there was a crowd watching from afar that you hadn't noticed from afar.
Lee Know stepped in, "get over it. She doesn't want your fucking ass and is perfectly happy without you. Whatever she said in the past is definitely not how she feels anymore, now she loathes your ass. So, tell me this.." He stepped closer to him and you suddenly realized why everyone fears him too, he's not afraid to point out the obvious and speak up, he whsipered something inaudible to him. Hyunjin clenched his jaw and had a face of anger. He walked away defeated and Lee Know laughed as he did. You looked at Lee Know differently now, he stuck up for you when no one else did.
Maybe in another universe, you two could've been friends. Maybe he's not so bad afterall. Then you realized how rude you were to Hyunjin.
"My god, I'm turning into you!" He chuckled as your hands covered your face. "Is that so bad?" You nodded your head yes aggressively and he rolled his eyes. "Lino~~~" Oh God, as drunk as ever your brother came over to you two. "Chan, why did you drink so much?" He collapsed on the car and burped loudly, classy. "Okay, let's get you two home."
~~~
"Does he always get this drunk?" You asked Lee know and he shrugged his shoulders. "Sometimes, only when he's stressed I guess." You plopped down on the couch and he collapsed next to you. You both sighed heavily and tried to relax. Although it didn't last long, "how are you feeling about tonight?" You shook your head, "let's not talk about it..." He cares, he cares about what you're feeling. "It's weird, isn't it?" He furrows his face in confusion, "what is?" You smiled slightly as you looked at him, "those moments where we don't hate each other." He sighed once again, "like I said. I don't hate you."
"I know." You do know that, but in your heart, you can't shake off the past. "But I know you hate me, and that's okay. I'll make you like me someday." You laughed softly, you're already starting to. You start to think about the party again and a light appears in your head. "What if we strike a deal with each other?" He raised an eyebrow, obviously interested. "What if we pretended to date?" He dropped his head back and sighed, "what do I get out of this?" You scooted closer to him, "well it'll make your ex jealous, plus it would also make Hyunjin jealous too... and maybe he will regret not being with me. Also increase my popularity." He sucked on his teeth, "seems this only benefits you, I couldn't care less about my ex."
You pondered and searched your mind for a benefit for him, "fine then, you get me." His eyes widened and he brought his head back down to normal level, "excuse me?" You leaned onto the couch on one arm, holding your head, "you heard me. I'll let you hit it whenever you want." He scoffed, "I'm offended that you think I don't have access to that already." You bit your bottom lip, "but it's not me. It's different, I'm your enemy." He squinted his eyes and blinked about a thousand times, like to actually think about it. "So, you're saying you want to have hate sex?" You almost giggled and shrug your shoulders.
"I knew you were in love with me." You smiled and shook your head, "like I said, no." He mimicked your position and got closer, "so if I told you I wanted you right now, spread out and making you cry for it. You would do it?" You made a face of disgust, "okay don't make it weird. But essentially.. sure. After all if imma lose my virginity to someone, might as well be you." He retracted his face is shock, "wait you're a virgin? God, you were really waiting for him, huh?" Unfortunately yes, you were.
He licked his lips and nodded, "okay fine. I'll be your fake boyfriend. But that means that you can't fight me on couple duties and don't tell Chan." What have you gotten yourself into?
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He seemed to keep up his end of the deal, to not be able to get away from him, even at school. Your phone began to ring and you reached into your book bag, more of a tote bag and answered it. "Hello?" His voice was excited and jumpy, "hi y/n.~" You nearly hung up the phone as soon as he spoke. "Lee know?? How did you even get my number?" You audibly groaned his name. "Your brother~" he cooed. "Remind me to murder him later.." He laughed softly and you felt butterflies appear in your tummy, you clenched your stomach and nearly punched yourself to make it go away.
"Why are you calling me?" You cross one of your arms across your chest and the other holding up your phone. "That's how you talk to your savior? Your brother told me to take you home." You groan aloud and begin to walk down the path to the front. "Why didn't he come for me?" There's a loud beep of a horn and you stop into your tracks. "Sorry, apparently that car didn't see me.. maybe he wanted us to spend alone time together." You roll your eyes. "I highly doubt that." He clicks his tongue, "so where are you?" You continue your walking again but go even slower. "I'm hiding, or maybe im at home or maybe im in Hyunjin's car. Could be anywhere really as long as I am away from you." This feeling makes you feel upbeat, you like teasing him.
"Tell me where you are right now you brat," he speaks quickly in a rude tone. "Okay, first of all, rude." He sighs heavily and then chuckles softly to himself, "nice dress, Princess. Can I take it off?" Your phone slightly drops down when you search your surroundings for him. You furrow your brows when you don't find him. "How'd you know I-" You scream as your feet are lifted off the floor, being carried from behind by your waist. "Found you," he whispers and attacks your neck, biting it playfully and pretending to eat it while making gurgling noises. "Okay, okay, enough! Put me down!" People were staring.
He sets you down gently and you toss your phone back into your bag. "Here, let me get that for you." He deattaches your book bag off your shoulder and onto his. "Thanks," you mumble softly. His arm cheekily raises over your head to your shoulder, "So, what are we doing today huh? Going to dinner? Or a fair? Maybe even the movies?" You stopped walking, pushing his arm off and your mouth was slightly agape as he looked at you curiously, "what are you talking about? We're going straight home." He pouted his bottom lip, as you noticed his car. Without waiting, you marched straight to it and to the passenger's side door, about to open it until he slammed it shut.
He leans in close, keeping a firm grip on the door. "We have to go out," he said softly, you shook your head no as you kept trying to open the door. "Come onnn, let's go on a date. You were the one who said you wanted to do this fake dating thingy." He whined pathetically and you knew he was just messing with you. So obviously you had no intentions or interest in saying yes. But you did anyway, just to mess with him. "Hmm, why not?" He perked up immediately and stepped closer to you. "Really?" "No," you said almost immediately and he frowned. "Well too bad because we're going anyway." He finally let go of the door and opened it. You glared at him as you went in and he softly smiled.
~~
He took you out for ice cream. It was nice. He was nice and complimented your dress. He took you home afterward, and surprise surprise. No Chan. "Great, I don't wanna be alone... Come inside?" He looked at your front door and then you. "Can I cash in?" Already? You weren't prepared yet. And weren't exactly ready to give it up yet. "Oh, I haven't prepped or anything." He stepped closer to you, merely inches away. "I don't need all that, just you." But why the hell not? The sooner the better.
You led him inside and up into your room, making sure to lock the door. He wandered about as you quickly went into the restroom to touch up, the door was open to keep an eye on him. You walked in after a couple minutes and he was sitting on the bed, looking at picture. One of you in elementary, playing in the grass alongside Hyunjin. "I always thought you were so pretty when you played in the grass, I never got the chance to go with you. Your protector prohibited it." You approached him slowly and sat on the bed. You pulled the picture out of his hand, "forget him. I'm here now."
His eyes scanned your face as you tossed the photo aside. You prepared yourself, first kiss, first everything would be with him. He leaned in slightly. "What if my brother finds out?" His hand slips behind your ear, tucking softly at your hair strands. "He won't," he whispers against your lips. He stares into your eyes, flickering down often back down to your lips. "God, you're so damn beautiful." He pressed his soft lips into yours, taking you whole. You sighed in relief, it's as magical as you thought it would be. Moist and soft as pillows. Connecting two bodies into one.
"Don't stop," you mumbled against his lips. And he didn't. He entered his tongue softly into your mouth, entangling his with yours. You moaned at the feeling, the pleasure intensifying and all your doubts fade away. He reaches at the bottom of your dress, pulling it up above your waist. Revealing your underwear and tugging at it. He strokes at your concealed clit, he smiles. "You're wet for me, baby?" You almost moaned at the nickname. You felt shy now that he pointed it out. "You're sure you want to go through with this? I can stop."
You don't want him to stop. "Don't you dare stop." You pulled him back into your lips. You felt him smile against your lips. He pulled your dress over your head and laid it onto the floor. You reached for his belt. He stopped you as he took it off himself. You crawled back higher in the bed for room. He undressed himself until he was in his underwear too, the beautiful scar appearing once again. You couldn't help but stare, he is beautiful you have to admit. You reached for his pants and pulled out an aluminum wrapper. Holding it in his mouth and crawled toward you seductively. You giggled as he appeared on top of you and you took the wrapper out of his mouth.
He kissed your neck which made you melt in his touch. It felt like heaven and sent tingles down your body. Intensifying the building pleasure. He reached around your back and unclipped your bra. You weren't expecting it and gasped, so easily slipping it off. He attached his lips to your breast immediately, making your back arch as he sucked on it softly. His fingers teased at your entrance, playing with your panties and slapping it against your sensitive skin. "Don't tease me," you whimpered and his eyes turned dark with lust. He grabbed the wrapper from you and slipped down his underwear. Your mouth dropped, you weren't expecting it so suddenly.
You felt compelled to look at it and dragged down your panties. He groaned as he made eye contact with your pussy. He opened the wrapper and slipped it on neatly and swift. Getting ready and you prepared as he positioned himself. He entered smoothly and you moaned aloud, you covered your mouth but he pulled it away quickly. He kept your hands above your head at your wrists and the other positioning himself into you. You felt so full. "Fuck, fuck. It feels so good." You whined out as he continued to bottom out into you. He finally stopped pushing until you. The pain and pleasure mixing.
You moaned happily and tried to break free of his hold. "God, you're fucking perfect," he whispered. The praise got you going even more. He pulled out to the tip and pushed back in. You moaned heavily again as he began to set a rhythm. "Fuck, you're gonna make me come if you keep clenching like that." You wrapped your legs around his waist to encourage him. "Cum if you want to, just keep going." You've never talked like this to anyone. He let go of his grip around your wrists and readjusted your legs. Laying your ankles onto his shoulders and holding your legs close.
He pushed back into you and you practically crumbled in his hands. The pleasure was intensified, heightened. You cried out as he mercilessly pounded into you. "Please, please" you begged although you didn't know what. His thumb rubbed against your sensitive bud and you pushed away with your hips. You whimpered out as he kept abusing your body. "What's wrong, can't take it?" He teased you which made you angry, you hate being teased especially by him. It's his favorite thing to do.
"I hate you. I hate you. I hate you." You chanted against his rhythm. "I hate you so much," you mumbled to yourself. He smirked, "keep talking and watch what's gonna happen." A challenge, you know you can't resist. "I hate that I love this so much," you laughed breathlessly, "I hate that I love you fucking me." You squealed as he turned you over onto your stomach. He pushed your neck into the sheets and arched your back, a sting on your butt appeared. You whimpered at the pain, he slid on once again and you screamed into the pillow. "Keep going," he whispered into your ear. And so you did, confessing all what you were thinking.
"I hate that you're so attractive." He pulled your hair into a bundle and moaned softly. Butterflies appeared in your stomach, he was enjoying this, enjoying you. "I hate that you know exactly how to make me crumble in your hands." Tug. "I hate that I crave you at times I shouldn't." He begins to pound up into you fast and harsh, making you a moaning mess. "I hate that I've wanted you all these years!" You want it, want it so bad. You need a release. "That's all I wanted to hear," he whispered sweetly into your ear and pulled your face to kiss him. You cried out into his mouth as he mercilessly grinded into you. He moaned loudly, his hands bracing onto your hips as his pace slowed. But he kept going, for you.
He snapped his hips into you once, twice, and you collapsed. Like a thread being cut. A knot being undone. A firework finally exploding. Release, sweet beautiful release. He talked you through it, "that's it. Just let it go, princess. You're doing so good." You relaxed in his arms, feeling him slip out of you slowly. You suddenly felt empty now, without the comfort of him. He laid you down softly onto your back. "You okay?" He cooed at you as he brushed the hair out of your perfectly happy face. You nodded your head, "what are you smiling about, hm?"
"I'm just happy." You were. He gave you an experience that you'd dream of. He pulled back to yank off the rubber, and threw it away into your bathroom trash. You got up reluctantly to pull your underwear back on. But once you felt your feet hit the ground, a sharp sensation drew up your back and you stumbled onto your knees. He came running to your laid as you laid helplessly, "ow."
~~~
You two had a conversation after, establishing some boundaries. "Okay so first off," you underlined the top of the page titled, agreement. "We are not allowed to fall for each other, no romantic feelings whatsoever." He nodded in agreement as you scribbled it along the page. "Have to show some sort of affection in public for fake dating purposes... and make a public appearance at a party or something." He sighed heavily and rolled his eyes. "It's not that hard okay? It can be a simple gesture like a kiss on the cheek or a hug." You wrote it down.
"And I get to have my benefit whenever I want." He mentioned as he snatched the paper away from you and wrote it down. "As long as it's not in front of other people, I'd rather not flash my pussy to a stranger." He chuckled at your bluntness. "Oh right one more thing," you took the paper back. "Agreement will be void once goal is made aka I get my crush or broken." He stared hard at you, confusion in his sparky eyes. "You still want that guy? After all he did?"
You shrug your shoulders, "I mean I get it. You get lonely without someone to love. And plus, now I know the benefits of having someone." You cheekily rose your eyebrows at him in a playful way. He sighed and looked away. "I don't understand why you don't want your ex back. Didn't you two love each other?" He shook his head and you laid the paper onto the table in front of you two. "Why?" He sighs, "because she isn't you." You look at him confused, scared. "She isn't you... as friends, we have a connection, we light up around each other. I don't have that connection with her. I crave a connection if I want a relationship."
You understood what he meant. You do. You two seem to always encourage each other and be confident. You're not afraid of telling him anything. He changed the subject. "So, what did you mean that you've wanted me all these years?" Oh shit. You'd forgotten about that, your ears begun to stung. Might as well come out with the truth. "Well, I've always found you attractive. I just didn't wanna admit it."
"Yeah, I kinda have that effect on people." He flicked his imaginary long hair. You cackled out at his demeanor. "So that basically means you fantasize about me, huh?" You scoffed jokingly, "okay enough Mr. Cocky," you threw a pillow at him and he laid in defeat.
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You had to begun to hang out at school with each other more. His friends had grown accustomed to you now. It was working, everyone believed you two were together. But thank god it was Friday, you hate school. You were sitting at the table where his friends were, waiting for him to arrive when you noticed his ex. Glaring at you with such fire in her eyes. "Hey," Lee Know said and you jumped once you felt his hand on your back. "Hi," he pecked you on the cheek. "You okay?" You nodded, while still looking in her direction, he noticed and followed your gaze. His eyes darkened as he noticed that she was whispering to her friends while looking at you. You felt suddenly conscious of yourself.
"Imma go okay?" You said softly to him but he grabbed your wrist to stop you. "Don't go, I'll handle it." You shook your head, "it's fine. Don't ruin anything between you two because of me." His eyes screamed at you to stay but you couldn't. You couldn't stand sitting there while she talked about you. So you walked away, feeling an ache in your stomach. You went to a nearby bathroom and washed your face. You stayed in there, looking at the mirror at your clothes. 'It could be better,' you thought. Maybe you'll go shopping.
You walked out upset and bumped into a tall boy. "Sorry," you said as you pulled away. "Y/n?" You stared up at him, that familiar face. "Hey Hyunjin." You stood silent, awaiting what he would say, it seems like he's got a lot on his mind. "Look I just wanted to say about how sorry I am for the other night. It was stupid and I don't even like the girl, I swear. I cut ties with her." You sighed heavily and put your hands in your sweaters pockets. "Let's just forget about that okay?" He nodded his head and you turned to leave.
"Wait," you stopped and looked up at him once more. "How about we go out tomorrow? So I can really make it up to you. Meet me at our spot at 3?" Your spot, you haven't been there in a long time. It's a big playground, you two would always meet up there in the past and just talk. "Sure, I'll be there." You walked away and find a stray Lee know again.
"Where'd you go?" You smacked your lips, "I have news!" His eyes creased and a small smile emerged. "Hyunjin asked me to go out tomorrow, as an apology." His smile quickly faded, and his eyes dropped down to his feet. "Isn't that good? I have to go shopping after school though, for some clothes." He nodded his head quick and reached into his back pocket, pulling out his wallet. "Get something nice for yourself okay?" He hands you a couple of big bills. "No, no. I don't wanna use your money." You try to hand him it back but he pulls away. You sigh reluctantly and put the money into your pocket.
He leans forward into your ear, "maybe you can buy something nice for the two of us, hm?" You instantly knew what he meant, lingerie, and your face reddened at the thought of it. "Don't be naughty."
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It was the next morning, and Lee know had shown up to question you about Hyunjin. He sat next to your floor mirror on a seat cushion. "And you'll be alone?" You rolled your eyes as you grabbed your shopping bag, pulling out the new dress you bought. It's a navy blue and tight fitted, you're planning on wearing some stockings with it so you won't be completely exposed. "You're stressing too much about this." You said while walking over to your bathroom to change, bringing the bag with you. "Yeah, because I care about you."
You began to dress behind the door as you listened. "I just don't want him to try anything funny." You walked out, over to the mirror, in front of him, "It'll be fine, it's in public." He stared at you, scanning up and down and you smiled happily at the result. "So.. do you like it?" You turned to him and did a twirl. "Love, I'm not even looking at the dress." You sucked in a breath and smiled, you lifted your hair and tried to assess if it looked good. "Hmm, hair down. Only I get to see you with your hair pulled back." You knew what he meant to that too.
Which reminded you of the surprise you had for him. You had noticed a lingerie store next to the dress store. And you gave in, picking out a white set. After all it is his money, he'll enjoy it. "Hold on, I have a surprise for you." You skipped over to the bathroom and changed into it. It hugged you beautifully, a blinged out corset top with see through panties, attached was some laced stockings. It came with a light cover dress, it was flowy and very pretty. You bit your bottom lip as you gazed at yourself. Definitely out of your comfort zone, but so is everything.
"What's taking so long-" He pushed open the door and his face practically dropped. His eyes didn't know where to land. You shifted on your heels, "do you like it?" He said no words. He lifted you up from your legs and hung you over his shoulder. "Hey, what are you doing!" You screamed out and kicked your legs, it was useless. He dropped you onto your bed and quickly ran to your room door, locking it. You didn't know what he was doing, you only assumed. He wants to fuck you again.
"Get on your knees," he ordered you without hesitation. You've never seen him like this, so dominant. You slowly dragged yourself onto the floor. Gradually getting onto your knees, you looked up at him through your lashes. He slowly unzipped his pants and you gulped. You know what he wants. He pushed down his pants to his ankles along with his boxers. You stared at his length, rock hard. "You have no idea what you do to me," he said as he stroked your cheek. It felt so innocent in this setting, it soothed you. He wrapped his hand around himself and pressed it to your lips. "You know what to do."
You parted your lips slightly and pressed a soft kiss onto him. You moved his hand out of your way, replacing it with yours. And slowly, seductively, teasingly, you kitty licked at his tip. He hissed as he watched you. He grabbed your hair into a ball, holding it out of the way to enjoy the show. Finally, you pushed him into your mouth, you held down your tongue and tried your best not to gag. It was impossible and caused your eyes to fill with tears. "Fuck," he muttered under his breath, and he tugged on your hair aggressively, pushing your head. You didn't care, he can use you all he likes.
"Fuck, I need you right now." You hummed against him and he moaned out loud. You were beginning to feel a glow in between your legs. He pushed your mouth off of him and you got onto the bed. He threw his shirt off and you could cum at the sight, he's so breathtaking. He ripped your sheer dress off you, "hey don't ruin it!" He growled, "my money, my girl, I can do what the hell I want." You're not his girl, you were about to correct him when he pushed aside your panties. One of his fingers entering inside of you and you moaned. Prepping you for him.
He took out a condom and once again slipped one on with one hand, what an expert. He planted his hand next to your head and kissed you softly, his kisses were always so gentle. He slipped into you, beginning a rhythm and you moaned loudly into his mouth. He pulled away, "I feel that good?" You nodded your head quick and did not even try to be quiet. Your arms slipped around his neck and you closed your eyes in pure bliss. He was grunting hard, like he was gonna finish soon. But you knew he would keep going even if he did. He started to go faster while his moans were getting louder. You felt a slight shoot get blocked off and the condom fill up.
You felt a rush of pleasure come over you, you felt your high coming in close. You started to whimper out and clawed out his back. He then began to trickle kisses down your neck but you felt a slight sucking sensation. "Don't," you said breathlessly, "I'm still going out after this." He stopped and you saw how angry his expression was. His rhythm slowed down unexpectedly and you made eye contact with him. "Keep going. I'm so close," you begged him. "Uh, uh. You want to go out still? You don't get to finish." And he denied you of finishing. He pulled out of you.
You groaned, annoyed. "Why are you so mean?" You whined as he moved away from you. He smiles, "because," and kisses your cheek. You frown. He took off his condom and threw it in the bin next to your bed, you had planned ahead by putting one there. But you had your own ideas. As he laid beside you and stared at the ceiling, your hand slipped off your panties. Your hand slipped down between your folds, and circled your clit. You moaned out as you stared at Lee know, making eye contact. He shook his head disapprovingly. You were only to this to make him realize he made a mistake.
"Mm, Lee know," his name slipped out of your lips so easily. You made sure to sound as breathless as possible. It was working as you saw he was getting hard again. "I won't engage," he told you but you knew he was lying. "Fine," you stopped and got on top of him. "You won't play with me?" You grabbed his now hard length and held it lined up to your entrance. "Y/n, don't. I'm not wearing-" You ignored him as you slid down slowly. You braced yourself onto his stomach and moaned out pathetically, why did he never let you experience it raw before? It's addictive.
He feels crazy good. You can feel every ridge and curve. Everything hits the right spot. "Oh my god," you gripped onto his chest. "Oh my god," you screamed out in glee. The build up is threatening to snap, and you love how it's feels right before it does. "Thats it, my love. Let it out," he whispered sweetly to you. Snap. And you go falling down onto him.
~~~
He begged you not to go, but you weren't going to stand up Hyunjin. You couldn't... At least not without an explanation. You walked over to the park, he was no where to be found. Your phone began to ring, unknown caller. You answered it, "hello?" There was a sudden burst of laughter, a girl. "Oh y/n. Did you really think he was gonna go? You're quite stupid to think that." You recognized the voice, Lee knows ex. "He ditched me?" There was a noise of scramble on the other side. "Hello y/n." Hyunjin. You gritted your teeth. "I like your dress, very revealing. Did you go shopping for me?" You looked around and saw no one, suddenly you felt cold and began to walk out of the park.
"Why are you doing this?" He laughed softly to himself. "It's payback, you betrayed me by getting with Lee know." Anger began to pelt up inside you, "I never betrayed you. You betrayed me." He laughed once again. "But something smells fishy doesn't it? I think it's you." Just then you turned when a loud car pasted by, the window was down. Splash. You were hit with a bucketload of water. You gasped as you fell to the ground from the weight. You screamed when you saw a fish had been through with it. You didn't know what to do, you ran.
Home. You don't know where that is. All you knew was him. You needed him. His comfort. His words. You needed to go to him.
~~~
You knocked on his door repeatedly and rang the doorbell. Clutching your soaked body and sobbing out. The door swung open fast, when his eyes landed on you. He had a look who could kill. "Who did this to you?" You didn't want to answer. You knew he would go after him and that's the last thing you wanted. "It's none of your business." You said calmly. "You're my fucking business. What happened?" He spit out his words and tears flowed down your cheeks once again. "I'm gonna kill him." He stormed past you but you clutched onto his arm. "Please don't leave me. I need you here."
His gaze softened and immediately took you into his arms. "I'm not gonna leave you, I swear." You smelled, really bad. But he didn't care. He held you for so long. You wish he would never let go. "Come on, let's get you cleaned up." He led you inside and into his bathroom. He lives alone. You remember that, no siblings, parents gone. It must be awfully lonely. He sat you down on the toilet lid while he turned on the water for a bath. Putting bubbles in it. You laughed amused to yourself, he has bubbles for himself?
He looked confused at you, "feeling better?" Your face fell sullen again. "Get undressed," he said and pulled you off the seat. You pulled the dress off and the stockings. He picked them up and waited for you to take off the rest. You turned away from him and took off your underwear. You got into the water and sat down. He left with your clothes and came back with his own, a hoodie and some shorts. Sigh, no underwear. He was respectful when he came over to you, only looked at your face. Nothing else. He scrubbed you clean and gently rubbed shampoo into your hair.
You could've done it yourself but he insisted. He said he felt bad for letting you go. For letting them get to you. "I'm sorry this happened y/n." At least one person actually cares for you. He left so you can dry yourself and get dressed. After you did, you walked into his living room. Wandering around his place and found him in the kitchen. He had a pan of butter grilling, while he was cutting some freshly washed asparagus. "Hey, hope you like steak,' he said as you walked to his side. There was a plate of seasoned meat sitting next to the cutting board. "You're the whole package, huh. Everything a girl would hope for." He laughed softly, "hope she comes soon."
~~~
You had slept at his place that night, after having a full tummy and a movie night on his couch. You got to talking. "Tell me a lie that you've told yourself all your life." He asked while putting an arm on the couch behind your back. You smile softly, "that we can't be friends. I should've given you a chance a long time ago." You laid your head against his arm, your body still facing him. "So you don't hate me anymore?" You didn't want to admit it so you just smiled and looked down.
"Say you hate me, y/n." You glared at him, challenge in your eyes. "Say it," he curved his head and gave you a stern look. You tried to lose your smile but laughed when you said, "I hate you." His tone was playful. "Say it like you mean it." A smile crept up on your lips, "I can't."
You two were silent now. "I don't hate you Lee know. I guess your charm has finally won me over." He pulled your body close to his, "good. We can finally be friends now, best friends." Your eyes began to drop, heavy with sleep, "Yeah, I would like that." You fell asleep. And woke up in his bed.
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"Good morning sleepy head," he said sitting up. You stretched out, looking down at his hoodie. Forgetting that you had it. "What time is it?" You mumbled and rubbed your eyes. "Time to wake up," he said while grabbing his phone. "Look at this," he flashed a photo up at you, a picture of you lying on his chest. "Delete it," he shook his head. "It's my new wallpaper." You tackled him, attempting to snatch the phone out of his hand. You huffed once he shoved it into his bedside drawer. "Come here," he whispered and motioned to his lap. He pulled you over, and you laid onto him, straddling on him.
You set your head between the cradle of his neck and shoulder. Your arms resting around his neck. This feels nice. Comforting. "Thank you," you grazed your fingertips against his arms. His arms wrapped around your waist. "For what?" His chest flowed up and down, "for being here, with me." He hummed and traced his hand up your spine. "You're being so sweet all of a sudden." Your head slowly raised and your thumb lined his lips, "I'm just happy I have you." He looked at you suspiciously, "you want something don't you?"
Your eyes snapped up at him and he tilted his head in confusion. You smiled, he caught you, "feel like exploring?" He sighed and tried to look annoyed. He looked up at you with a soft look and stroked your cheek, "I didn't think you would want to do anything.. Aren't you tired?" You shook your head, you leaned forward to his neck. Removed his hands from your cheek and sprinkled kisses. He pulled back and you frowned, "I want you to do what I did for you the other day.. the stuff with my mouth?" His tongue rolled inside, along his cheek. He cheekily smiled, "You want me to do that to you?" You nodded your head and pouted.
"Aww, anything for you," he rolled you over onto your back. He pressed his lips against yours softly, igniting you. You pulled him to stay, gripping his sleeves. You moaned against his lips once you felt his hand pulling at your shorts. "I like seeing you in my clothes," he whispered against your lips. "I like being in them," you teased him back, "but I'd rather not have any on with you." He tilted his head once again in surprise. You took the opportunity to scatter your mouth against his neck. This time he cooperated. "You're becoming more and more like me."
You smiled against his neck and began to suck against the sensitive skin. He pulled away after a few seconds, he looked down at you, "oh so when you do it, it's okay?" You shrugged your shoulders, "you can do it to me if you want." He immediately got to action. He pressed his lips to your neck, you felt yourself flush. He sucking harshly and you winced softly, he kissed down your collarbones and lifted your shirt. Sucking on your breasts, it seemed it was letters of some sort.
He finally stopped after a while, he kissed your lips. "Ready?" You smiled and he crawled down your body. Your hands laid on your chest comfortably. Once his wet lips pressed against your inner thigh, you gasped. You almost closed your thighs in surprise. "Just relax for me, baby." You did and released the tension. He softly laid your legs onto his back. You could feel his hot breath on your core and it was driving you crazy. Finally, he set his lips onto you. Your hands crashed into his hair.
He kissed your clit softly causing your body to jolt. His eyes looked up at you, dark and sparkling. He looks perfect like this. You grab your phone from the bedside table, he put it there to you. A capture an array of pictures of him, "do I look pretty?" He asks and you nod your head. His tongue makes its way and pushes into you. The pressure building in your stomach. You set the phone down beside you. He attacked your clit again, sucking and kissing while his fingers entered inside you. It was too much, your body enjoyed it too much. You let go. Cracked.
You felt light headed, minutes, hours seemed to pass by in a second. "Holy shit, are you okay?" You nodded your head and a warm presence kissed your cheek. You cooled down and hugged his body close to yours. "Feel like going out tonight?" He asked softly, looking into your eyes lovingly. "Yeah, but I want more." You said as you pulled the covers over you two.
~
"I have nothing to wear!" You cried out in your closet. "You have plenty of clothes, you just went shopping." You searched in the pile of clothes on your floor, "I don't know if I want to wear a skirt or a dress or pants." He sighed heavily, "it's gonna rain tonight." You frowned and picked up a pair of pants, better to be comfy than cold. "I'll would wear a revealing top to better the outfit. But someone decided to leave hickeys that say MINE on me." You pulled out a shirt and showed him it. He crossed his arms, "wear what you want. I can fight."
You hit him with the shirt, "there will be no fighting tonight. I want just want to chill and enjoy a beer." You pull the clothes on quickly and turn to him, shooting him a look that says 'how do I took?' "You look beautiful," he cringes immediately after the compliment leaves his lips and you giggle to yourself. "Wow, can't say anything nice without cringing."
~
The party was pretty boring. No fights. No arguments. Just what you wanted. Just a night to chill with some friends and your brother. Chan questioned you about where you were, "you were gone the whole night." You pushed him away, "like you're not gone for days at a time. I had a rough night and crashed at a friend's." He seemed to believe you and moved on. It was technically true. Lee know is your friend.. friend with benefits? Fuck buddy? Best friend? One of those.
You walked over to a group where Lee know was chatting with his buddies. They tried to tease him by lifting up his shirt but he quickly dodged their attempts. "Come on guys. You know he doesn't like anyone touching or seeing his scar," Chan scolded. Your eyes darted to Lee know. He doesn't? But he let you, he didn't care when you saw him, saw his scar. When you traced your fingers along it. "Whatever, I need a drink." He walked away from the group and he grazed along your arm for you to follow. You did, and immediately questioned him, "I didn't know you didn't like when people touch you there." He didn't answer for a while. "I don't." You whispered softly to him as he grabbed a cup. "But you let me."
"Isn't it obvious y/n?" He took a big gulp out of his cup, chugging it down. "What is?" He looked into your eyes, searching for something, something that you should already know the answer to. "Never mind," he shook his head off and began pouring himself another drink. "No, what? Tell me." You snatched the cup out of his hands and he almost pouted. He leaned against the table, "I'd only let you because... I have a soft spot for you, I think you know the reason why." You blinked heavily, "but I want you to tell me, not for me to just guess." You looked down at the beer in your hands and took a small sip, it's bitter.
"I'll tell you later," he grabbed the cup back from you and took a sip. "You either tell me now or never." You walked away from him, he followed behind and you went outside. To have an actual private conversation. Its raining. You stopped at the end of the driveway, next to your brother's car, and awaited his answer. His hands were in his pockets and he stared at the ground. Water dripping down his hair and body naughtily. "So?" He looked up and shook his head, you sighed heavily. "God, you're such a coward." He furrows his brows, "excuse me?"
"You're a fucking coward. You talk all this nonsense saying you're sure about yourself and you're really not. You're pathetic." He raised his tone, "fine you really want to know?" You stood, wet, the question was seeping into your skin.
"I love you y/n."
You blinked a thousand times again. You stepped back and shook your head in disbelief. Disappointment. You both agreed that your relationship wouldn't go past any feelings. "Is that so hard to believe?" He said since you weren't saying anything. "I thought we agreed no strings attached, that this would never turn into something." He groaned and his hands flew up into his face, rubbing against it crazily. "How could you have not known, y/n? All these years I've waited for you, tried to get your attention just so you would look at me, like me!" You swallowed down a build up in your throat, feeling a heavy feeling. "It's you, y/n. It's always been you. Why can't you see it?"
"I don't chase girls, I never have. I never wanted to. But I'm chasing you." You fist your hands into a ball. He tries to approach you but you push him away. "Don't push me away," he pleads. "I'd like to go home now." You said bluntly. His eyes saddened, glassy with tears. You walked to his car, the rain was pouring down even harder. You turned angrily at him. "Why? Why now? Why did you never tell me this!" He shakes his head, "I didn't know how to say it." He paused. "But it's true, I love you y/n. And I never want to stop saying it." Tears begin to mix with the rain pouring down your cheeks. "I have loved you ever since I have known you."
"You're fucked up, you're fucking everything up!" He nodded his head and walked in a different direction, past you. You chased after him. "Don't walk away when I'm talking to you." He stopped next to his car, "what is there to talk about? I know you don't like me." The feeling in your chest was heavy, you know what you have to do. What to say. You find the words in your heart, you know what you feel for him. "I love you." He stops. "You're actually stupid if you don't realize how much I love you," you add and smile.
You look into his eyes, his mesmerizing eyes. "But I have to make sure, that you really do love me-" "yes." He cuts you off so sure of himself, like it's as easy as breathing. "Yes, I love you y/n," he runs up to you and involves you into a kiss. It's sweet and soft, butter against your lips. "There's never gonna be anyone but you." You smile, a smile so big and genuine, you feel as if you're floating. It dawns on you, "my brother is going to kill me when he finds out." He laughs against your lips, "don't worry about that."
~~~~~~~~
718 notes · View notes
yunhoszn · 3 months
Text
save a horse, ride a cowboy
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PAIRING jeong yunho x f!reader
WORD COUNT 12.25k
GENRES fluff﹒angst﹒smut
WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, reader is a city girl but i tried not using too many gendered terms, cowboy!yunho RAHHHHH, mentions of food, reader has a boyfriend for most of the fic (an oc) but there’s no real infidelity, reader embarrasses themselves on what i’d say is a few occasions too many, yunho is down bad, masturbation (m! and brief f! receiving), lowkey voyeurism, a really bad dad joke, horse riding scene bc i feel that’s pivotal for a cowboy fic, lots and lots of kissing, marking, teasing, vaginal fingering x2, oral sex (f! receiving) x2, multiple orgasms, very slight edging, praise, pet names (baby, babe, and princess oops), unprotected sex (BE SAFE PLS I BEG), cowgirl position, pull out method, missionary position, creampie lol, ending is cute but also kinda up for interpretation? i guess <3
SUMMARY when your grandparents decided to retire and take a summer’s long vacation in celebration, they leave their house in your care. at least you don’t have to worry about feeding the farm animals. but you do have to worry about the tall, handsome cowboy who does.
MORE AND SHE’S DONE oh my god, this fic actually pulled so much out of me i think i was the one seeing stars by the end.. 😭 but i’m so proud of it and the goals i tried meeting while writing. first of all the length??? insane for me. i can hardly get myself to write anything longer thank 5k 😞 THATS ENOUGH ABOUT ME THO,,, this fic was heavily inspired by the django performance if u couldn’t tell by the banner 😝 and i’d first like to thank the academy aka @kimsohn for encouraging me to write this and fueling my delusions ilysm maya <3 i’d also like to give a huge thank u to @bro-atz TYSM FOR BETAING AND HELPING WITH SCENES BRO ur my life saver fr <3 PLS PLS PLS REBLOG IF U ENJOYED!!
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Growing up, you weren’t the biggest fan of trips to your grandparents’ farm in the rural countryside. 
You were born in a big city, full of all the glitz and glam. There were bright lights that lit the skyline at night, distracting from the stars that illuminated above. The wide open space was blocked by high towers and large skyscrapers. You were accustomed to the sound of bustling pedestrians and the obnoxious honking of cars in the streets. There was seldom an evening of complete silence. 
Everything was so tightly packed together, within walking distance if you didn’t feel like hopping in a car for a fifteen minute drive. You appreciated the insanity of the train station in the mornings before school, the metro so busy with students and working class individuals. You came into contact with numerous strangers throughout your day to day life. 
However, every summer until you were a senior in high school was a different story. 
Your parents wanted to keep you humble, you supposed, shipping you off to your grandparents’ for three months. Living in the city kept people too sheltered, too primped and polished for the real world. They wanted you to have that exposure, to experience what it was like to live without the fanciness of urbanization. The nine months out of the year that you spent in the city stunted that exposure, though.
When you’d arrive at their farm, luggage stacked like you were taking a trip to London or Paris, you felt like a glorified version of Regina George. Maybe Blair Waldorf. Elle Woods? You weren’t even rich like that. Your parents were nice, middle class people. There was just something about cow manure and the fear of stepping on a freshly laid egg that made it difficult to adjust to the setting.
It was most likely your stubbornness throughout your childhood that held you back even as you got older and more educated. You thought after graduating high school, the three-months-long “retreat” would come to an end. You’d only need to visit when necessary, maybe a week max. And that was true to an extent. During your university years, you only visited the farm around once a year. You were too consumed with school to even go home sometimes. 
And then your grandparents decided to retire. 
Their farm had supplied the town over with produce and other home-grown items for as long as you could remember. But they were getting older and no one in the family was willing to inherit the farm or its responsibilities. In celebration of their retirement, they planned a grand vacation to visit multiple countries. Their itinerary spanned an entire summer, just like your trips to the farm when you were younger.
Because you were the only one familiar enough with the area, they enlisted you to housesit while they were gone. You tried to get out of it, but they didn’t trust anyone else as much as you, despite your convictions about country life. So you reluctantly agreed, packing up your things to prepare for another grueling summer at the farm one last time. 
But there was a bit of a setback.
”What do you mean someone’s living in the farmhouse behind their house?” You shriek into the receiver, holding your phone between your shoulder and ear as you zip up your final bag. Your mom sighs on the other end.
”Your grandma just only now told me, apparently it slipped her mind,” you can hear the sympathy in her tone. “He’s this boy who grew up in the town and he’s gonna take over the farm for them on the condition that they still live on the property. She said he shouldn’t get in your way and he’s expecting your presence. You’ll only see him if you ever actually go out to the farm and when he brings groceries to the house.”
”Great. Another thing I didn’t sign up for.” You mutter, giving your bedroom a once over to make sure you’re not forgetting anything. “Is there anything else I should know before I get there, like a secret pet or maybe a family living in the attic?”
”Watch the attitude, Y/N,” she warns, and you shut up immediately. “Look, I know this isn’t ideal. You’re a grown adult and you’d rather spend your summer going out with your friends, but you already told your grandparents you would do this for them. It’ll be over before you know it.”
You sigh, nodding even though she can’t see it. At least you didn’t have to worry about caring for their farm animals. It was time to think of this as a staycation rather than torture. Sure, your friends were going to be living it up in the Bahamas for a week and your boyfriend was going to be here while you were surrounded by nothing but flat landscape for acres. 
Perhaps it was good for you that there would be someone else on the property. You might’ve started to feel scared being alone in the middle of nowhere for so long. Though, your boyfriend probably won’t be the biggest fan of you staying within the vicinity of another man for three months. You’d just deal with that later. 
The drive to your grandparents’ farm is actually more peaceful than anything else. Driving for long periods of time wasn’t your favorite thing to do, but doing it by yourself with nothing but your music filling your ears was a sort of therapy. It allowed you to come to terms with your fate for the summer and what it could entail, even if it wasn’t exactly what you had in mind. 
Seeing the lush greenery for miles upon miles as you neared their home evoked a sense of tranquility within you. If you kept a positive outlook on your situation, you would make it through these next few months unscathed and your sanity still intact. Maybe you despised the wide open space for years when you were a kid, but now that you’re an adult, you think you could learn to appreciate it and its beauty. 
As long as the guy living in the farmhouse didn’t bother you like your grandmother said, everything would be—
Oh. 
You pull up in front of the house, already thrown for a loop by the tall, very handsome stranger walking his dog back from the mailbox. His dark hair obscured his eyes, a bandana tied around his neck to match with the one hanging off the Border Collie’s collar. The two turn around at the sound of your engine, stopping in their tracks once you’ve parked. 
He brings a hand up to shield the sun from his eyes, watching cautiously as you park slowly. You don’t know why you’re so anxious, it’s not like you’ll be interacting with him much during your stay anyways. There’s something about his slender figure and the fact that he was so clearly dedicated to what he does upon first glance that it makes you feel shy. You suck in a sharp breath before deciding to exit your vehicle, wiping clammy palms on your denim shorts. You’re starting to regret not dressing a little cuter, a little more presentable. 
His features soften upon recognizing you, the pretty granddaughter that your grandparents showed him prior to leaving for their trip. The hand sheltering his face falls to his side and he gives you a warm smile, somehow warmer and brighter than the sweltering summer sun. You’d always been told not to talk to strangers, to keep your distance for your own safety, but you can’t help mirroring his expression with a small wave. 
“H-Hi,” your voice wobbles and you kind of want to die just a bit. “I’m Y/N. My grandparents mentioned you lived in the farmhouse out back, but didn’t give me a name or face to expect.”
He extends his arm out and you shake his hand, albeit slightly nervously. His eyes squint when he glances between you and his dog. “It’s nice to finally meet you, Y/N. I’m Yunho, and this is Yeoreum.”
The name is fitting for the red and white colored Border Collie, her tongue sticking out as she stares up at you with big eyes that almost resemble her owner’s. You bend down to pet her, patting the soft tufts of fur on her head and appreciating her licks of excitement. Yunho laughs, whistling to catch her attention. 
“Yunho and Yeoreum,” you repeat, a tiny grin on your face. “Befitting. Does she come with the property?”
“Unfortunately, no. She’s spoken for,” he teases, a pout on his features. “But she can visit whenever you’d like. Jokes aside, did you need any help moving stuff into the house?”
”That would be great, actually!” You scratch the back of your neck, lips pursing. Yunho waits for you to unlock the trunk of your car and places Yeoreum’s leash in your possession, making quick work transporting your bags inside. What was just supposed to be some light assistance, has evidently become him doing everything on his own while you stand and look pretty with his dog.
You didn’t bring too much with you since you didn’t have plans to leave while you were housesitting and your grandparents weren’t so old fashioned that they didn’t have a washing machine. Still, you felt useless allowing this stranger you’d just met to do all this manual labor on your behalf.
”Does he always do this?” You murmur to the Border Collie, falling to a seat on the lowest front porch step. She doesn’t give you a response (not that you expected her to), but pants happily in lieu of one, craning her head so you can scratch the spot behind her ear. 
“You’re a guest, it’s just good hospitality for me to help.” Yunho says as he comes out of the house, stationing himself in front of you with his hands on his hips, thumbs in his belt loops. 
“There’s a difference between helping and doing the work yourself. You’re just being modest,” you push yourself up to hand him Yeoreum’s leash. “But thank you anyway, that was really nice. I’m so tired from driving up here, so I think I would’ve collapsed doing all that back and forth.”
”You should go rest,” he glances at the house behind you. “There’s a whole three months of farm life ahead of you, so don’t wear your pretty little self out just yet.”
Yunho salutes to you and takes his leave, walking around your grandparents’ house toward what you assume is the farmhouse. Your eyes are wide and your cheeks feel hot, and you’re well aware that it’s not because of the summer heat. Your fingers clutch at the material of your t-shirt and you shake it to fan yourself. 
It seemed like you were in for a bumpy ride these next few months. But like you reiterated prior to arriving, everything would be just fine so long as you and farm boy went your separate routes and lived your separate lives. 
Yeah. Things would be alright. You hope. 
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It’s a week into your stay on your grandparents’ farm when you bump into Yunho again. 
You’re toweling your neck after getting out of the shower, heading into the kitchen to make yourself another bowl of cereal for breakfast. So far the only downside has been your inability to cook a decent meal. Takeout or your boyfriend sleeping over were usually your saving grace, but without having either of those options, you’ve stuck to microwaveable things.
The sight of Yunho unloading groceries onto the counter has you squealing and nearly jumping out of your own skin. He flinches at your volume, knocking over the bag of rice resting against the vase in the center. Thankfully it was still sealed shut, if not there would’ve been a mess of rice grains all over the island counter. His clumsiness has you slapping a palm over your mouth to silence your giggles, not wanting to embarrass him.
”Sorry, I wasn’t expecting you…” You apologize sheepishly, folding your towel over your arm and placing it on a barstool nearby. 
“N-No, you’re fine! I shouldn’t have just let myself in, it’s kinda just a habit. You deserve your privacy without having to worry about whether or not I’m gonna barge in unannounced.” He dismisses your apology with a wave of his hand. “I’ll just put these up for you and then I’ll be on my way.”
”Can I help?” You waddle over to him, fingers laced behind your back. “I’d feel bad watching you put my groceries away for me after going out and getting them.”
Yunho gestures for you to occupy the space beside him with a small smile that takes solace at the corner of his mouth. The two of you do everything in complete silence, still not entirely used to each other’s presence because of the lack of crossing paths. As you’re finishing up, you start grabbing the items you need for your cereal. He raises an eyebrow at you.
”You don’t want something a little more filling?” He suddenly questions, jutting his chin at your bowl.
”I would love that if I knew how to cook,” you laugh. “Ironic isn’t it? The granddaughter of two farmers can’t cook to save their life.”
Yunho shakes his head with a chuckle, ruffling his hair. “Well, I don’t have to feed the horses for another hour if you’d like for me to whip up something better than a bowl of cereal.” 
“Really?” Your eyebrows furrow. Despite growing up with the mindset that you were above the farm life your grandparents tried to impose on you, you hated feeling like you were coming across as entitled. You didn’t want Yunho to think you were lazy or that you were too good. “You don’t have to do that. I can survive on instant ramen and cereal, I swear.”
”Y/N,” he says your name with a certain authority to it, and you’ve never loved the sound of your name coming out of someone else’s mouth so much before. “I want to. I’m not the world’s greatest chef or anything, but I have a couple tricks up my sleeve.”
”Okay, then,” you nod, taking a seat at the island. You watch in awe as he dances around the kitchen and prepares something for you. It’s weird, not in the sense that you feel awkward around this complete stranger, but because you feel the opposite. You feel comfortable around him, like you’ve known him for a while. It’s almost like Yunho has been a casual part of your life for much longer than a week. He’s easy to get along with, easy to mold into what you’re used to.
And that’s weird because you have a boyfriend. A boyfriend who cooks dinner for you most nights, but somehow has never made you feel this taken care of. It throws you off. That should definitely not be the case. How is this man doing this in one week and your boyfriend couldn’t in two years? 
The guilt settles in the pit of your stomach quickly. Sure, your boyfriend might’ve had a habit of forgetting important dates and didn’t give you half as much attention as he should’ve, but did that warrant the emotions brewing in your chest? Could that excuse this notion that maybe it was time to finally call it quits?
You zone out as Yunho finishes cooking your breakfast, too inside of your head to even fawn over the doting and slight coddling he was doing. Maybe you need to have a long conversation with Seojun about your relationship and where you want it to go. Perhaps it was a nice idea to invite him out to visit the farm, it could do you both some good. 
“Ta-da!” Yunho holds out a plate to you, the sparkle in his eyes effectively pushing out any thoughts of your boyfriend and the shame that was picking at you. You can’t help but reciprocate his expression when you see how delicious the food looks.
He’d made you omurice, the ketchup on top in cute squiggly lines to form whiskers and a little dog face. You accept the plate gratifyingly, your fingers brushing as you do so. He smiles shyly, eyeing you carefully while you take the first bite. You don’t remember the last time you had a home cooked breakfast, accustomed to the occasional muffin at the coffee shop near your house.
”’Not the world’s greatest chef’ my ass,” you grumble, pouting at his humbleness and his inability to be bad at anything. “I might just ask you to have breakfast with me every morning if you can chef it up this well.”
That melodic laugh of his rings in your ears, his elbows resting on the island and his chin in his palms. “I’m sure Yeoreum would appreciate a companion who isn’t me.”
“How long have you had her?” You ask, shoveling more omurice into your mouth. If you weren’t so hungry and so appeased by how delicious it was, you’d feel bad for ruining his hard work. The ketchup no longer looked like a dog, but rather a splatter of red all over your plate. 
“Almost four years now. I had her for a year before I met your grandparents. She adores them, so it’s no surprise that she likes you too.” He has this fond gaze in his eyes as he talks about his beloved Border Collie and it makes your heart ache. 
The fact that he has such a good relationship with your grandparents seals the deal for you. Well, it would seal the deal if you were single. Yunho is like the ideal man that every parent would want their daughter to bring home. He knows how to cook, knows how to clean. He’s adept around the house, skilled in yard work and other random jobs like fixing leaky pipes and installing new appliances. He’s gentle, but doesn’t mind getting his hands dirty. 
Your parents would never meet him, though. After the summer was over, you’d be back in Seoul and he would still be here, a distant memory. You forcibly laugh away the thought, excusing it as your response to his words and continuing the conversation about his dog. 
Perhaps this stay would be harder to get through than you thought. 
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As the weeks pass you by, you find yourself becoming more and more infatuated with Jeong Yunho.
Cooking breakfast for you in the morning has become a regular thing. Monitoring him at the stove with sleepy eyes and a mug of fresh coffee in your hands has ingrained itself into your routine. Yeoreum called the spot beneath your stool her own now, laying there as her owner made your food. You think the transition from seeing him as just this comforting presence, this kind individual, to wanting something more was almost too smooth.
Especially right now as you sit on the back porch sipping on some lemonade, admiring the cowboy as he transfers bales of hay from the bed of his pickup truck to the pigpen and the cattle pen. He pauses in between trips, stripping off his flannel and tying it around his waist. He lifts the hem of the white tank top he’s wearing and uses it to wipe sweat from his forehead, revealing the toned abdomen he had been hiding from you up until now. 
You feel like you’re going insane, trying to pretend like you’re reading your book as you not so subtly gawk at his muscles straining with each bale he lifts. It’s crazy really, the effect he has on you doing his fucking job. You’ve made it a habit to sit out here and stare at him under the guise of various other things. Aside from being borderline obsessive, it’s horrible because you’re still very much in a relationship.
Most people would feel a hell of a lot worse than you do, like their entire world was crumbling between their fingertips just for finding someone else attractive. But for some reason, as time has continued to roll on, that guilt— that self-preservation— has faded. You’re dipping into another emotion that you’re too scared to explore. 
Yunho takes a break from his labor to guzzle down a bottle of water, his chest heaving up and down from exertion. Had you been paying attention to anything other than the view of the handsome man, you would’ve noticed the glass sliding out of your grasp, the condensation becoming far too dense to keep a solid grip on the cup. In the midst of drooling over him, your lemonade falls to the ground with a loud clanging noise.
Your reflexes are only swift enough to save your book, but the drink spills everywhere else and you wince at how embarrassing the situation is. You hurry inside to grab a towel before he can see the mortification enveloping your features. He seemed like the observant type, like one scan of your face could tell him everything he needs to know without a single word exchanged. Your fingers curl around the edge of the counter, blowing a raspberry while you attempt to regulate your blood pressure.
Through the window above the kitchen sink, you make out a confused Yunho, brows furrowed as he looks in the direction of the house. He worried over you entirely too much, particularly when you take into account the fact that all you did was think about him in manners not necessarily safe for work. Maybe you were just delirious. That was the only logical explanation for why you’re spiraling.
The high temperatures of the summer coupled with your surroundings are contributing to your change in behavior. Yes. That made sense. You weren’t crazy.
With a bit more reprieve, you’re able to grab a tea towel and head back outside to clean up your mess. (Not unaccompanied by a couple glances in Yunho’s direction, but that’s fine. Perfectly healthy even. It’s normal to check up on a friend. At least, that’s what you tell yourself, but who’s holding you accountable?)
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“You know you’ve been making me breakfast every morning without asking for anything in return,” you speak up one morning, chin resting on the island. “Is there anything I can do to repay you?” 
Yunho purses his lips as he hands you your plate. “Nah, I like cooking for you.”
You try to ignore the way that has your heart fluttering in your chest, try to ignore the warmth blooming beneath your skin. Your eyes glance down at your food to avoid eye contact, bringing your chopsticks up to your lips. “Okay, well I wanna do something for you.”
Despite mumbling the words, he hears you anyway and smiles to himself as he takes a sip from his mug. He rolls up the sleeves of his denim button up, reaching down to scratch behind Yeoreum’s ear, the area that you’ve learned is her favorite. She pants joyfully, jumping on his leg excitedly. He looks between the two of you.
”Missy here needs a bath,” he says, cooing at her. “I was gonna give her one later, after I cleaned out the stables, but if you don’t mind doing it.”
”I’d do just about anything for that precious girl,” you nod enthusiastically. “Consider it done.”
This is how you end up out back, dog shampoo in one hand and the water hose in the other. 
Yeoreum’s signature bandana and collar lay on one of the rocking chairs on the porch, the dog looking so different without her accessories as you prepare to bathe her. You wet her fur generously, squeezing enough shampoo into your palm to lather it on. Compared to your childhood pets, she’s pretty well behaved.
She’s probably one of the only dogs who’s ever actually enjoyed taking a bath, sitting still for you while you scrub and rinse and repeat. You take your time with cleaning her, wanting to make sure you do your best as a thank you for every plate Yunho has ever made you. Usually, this isn’t something you would jump at the opportunity to do. Somehow, being back at the farm this past month or so has done everything your parents tried to do when you were younger.
It could’ve had to do with the desensitization of being here every summer for so long that it just never stuck when you were grade school age. But now, fully grown and experiencing this all over again on your own, with new faces at your side, it’s like you’re being exposed to something different. You can see why your mom and dad didn’t want the city life to become a dependency. 
You preferred the view of cabs and cafés over cows and chickens in the past, but now you found a sense of familiarity in them. You’d always want to go home as soon as you got here. Unlike other kids, you wanted your summer to be over as quickly as possible. You couldn’t imagine going home after this, though. This unveiled attachment to the farm you detested when you were younger could only be accredited to one person, and it was a little frightening. 
He constantly brought out parts of you that you didn’t know existed. This enigma, the one that emphasized how big of a role he’s fulfilling in the short period of time you’ve been here, drills itself into your brain every day. You knew you had to acknowledge it sooner or later, but it was just less of a hassle to act like it wasn’t screaming at you. Your fear of change was a more pertinent issue to ignore, so you let it consume all else. 
While getting lost in your thoughts, Yeoreum starts shaking and startles you, causing your hold on the hose to loosen, water spraying everywhere. The diversion has you losing your footing and slipping in the mud. You shriek, though it does nothing to block the stream that drenches you, your clothes getting wet. The universe decides it’s not on your side, because you happened to wear a white shirt. Why you chose to do that when you knew you were bathing a dog, you have no clue, but it was a little too late for regrets.
Yeoreum jumps out of the basin you had her in and runs to the farmhouse just as Yunho’s walking out, fresh from the shower. You forgot that he was cleaning the stables at the same time you were giving the Border Collie her bath, but now you’re starting to wish you waited until afterward just in case you needed the assistance. And well, you definitely needed the assistance. 
Plucking the tail end of the mishap, Yunho’s initial reaction is to laugh at your misfortune, but the closer he gets to the scene, the laughter dies out in his throat. Your top is sheer enough that he can map out the outline of your black bra. It leaves very little to the imagination and he thinks he might fall to his knees right here.
Since your grandparents told him that you’d be house sitting while they were away and proudly showcased a photo of you, he’s been enthralled by you. You had the face of an angel, or maybe a really enticing demon, he hasn’t cogitated it much yet. 
He swallows thickly, hoping to keep his composure as he makes his way to you. His hand is a little shaky when it reaches to take the hose from you, squeezing his eyes closed and switching off the water. He stays there for a few seconds to mentally prep himself for an up-close-and-personal look at you, even going as far as holding his breath. 
“Uh— you— um— you should go inside and dry off before you catch a cold,” Yunho keeps his eyes cast downward. He’s grateful that you don’t note how red the tips of his ears are, or how he thinks the sky is suddenly much more interesting than your face.
Your head cocks to the side in confusion. “What do you mean ‘before I catch a cold’? It’s, like, a million degrees out.” 
“The temperature drops at night and the sun’s setting soon. I’ll handle it from here. Yeoreum ran off, so I gotta chase after her anyway and I don’t think you want her to soak you more than she already has.” He’s insistent on shooing you away and getting you inside of the house. You huff.
”Okay… If you say so…” 
Reluctantly, you spin around and traverse back. The draft of the air conditioning has you shivering, rubbing up and down your arms as you enter the bathroom to inspect the damage. Your eyes almost bulge out of their sockets when you finally see yourself. No wonder Yunho was so adamant on staving you off like you were the plague. 
In your defense, you didn’t think the hose won the battle by that much. You assumed you’d just gotten everything above your shoulders wet, but no. You were practically doused head to toe. And the clear display of your brassiere under your clothes was the last thing on your mind.
He was stronger than you. Actually, he was a more respectful person than you. You would’ve gawked at him shamelessly if the roles were reversed. But at least you’re self aware! Right? The first step in recognizing that you have a problem, is admitting that you have a problem. That’s what you think they say in those addiction commercials, but you could be wrong. 
Wow. Now you were comparing him to drugs. Though, you suppose there isn’t that huge of a difference. Both had equal success rates in terms of getting people high and then making it hard to wane off their effects. 
You really had to quit it with the metaphor usage. 
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It’s around midnight that night when the lightbulb in the bathroom goes out, halting you from finishing your bedtime routine. 
You’re exhausted to say the least, face damp from washing it and one of those fuzzy hairbands with the animal ears perched on your head. You were ready to crash out, but there were still a couple things you needed to do before that. It was proving to be a little difficult in the pitch black bathroom. The window above the shower was too narrow to provide any sufficient moonlight.
With a low grumble, you shuffle into your slippers and make the short trek from your grandparents’ house to Yunho in the farmhouse. You hug yourself when a strong breeze blows past, your flimsy t-shirt and sleep shorts doing hardly anything to block the cool summer night’s air. 
A piece of you feels a little bad for bothering him so late, but you have no idea how to change a lightbulb. You don’t even know where the lightbulbs are. Besides, you think you’d electrocute yourself if you made an attempt to do it on your own. 
You huff out a sigh and bring your knuckles up to knock at his door, waiting patiently for a response. He’s not asleep, you know this because he’s mentioned that his internal clock doesn’t turn off until two in the morning. Circadian rhythms were an odd concept, so to each their own. 
“Yunho! It’s Y/N! Open up!”
When a few minutes have passed, you try the knob. Maybe it was a bit… too presumptuous of you to enter his home without explicit permission. Yes, you’d known each other for the better part of a month and a half, and yes, you’d gotten very close in that timeframe, but did that constitute your actions?
Whether or not the answer to that question was a yes or a no, you really wish you would’ve just waited outside. As you venture further in search of the cowboy, you stumble upon something you shouldn’t have. 
Standing in the hallway on the other side of his bedroom, the door ajar at least an inch, you catch a glimpse of him on his bed. That white tank top you’re so used to seeing him in is between his teeth, eyebrows knit together in pure pleasure as he fists his cock with a purpose. His nostrils are flared and whiny moans escape from behind the fabric. 
His head falls back every now and then, eyes fluttering shut when he runs his thumb over the slit. He’s so focused that he doesn’t notice you, too entranced with chasing his high. Your lips part as you watch him fuck up into his hand, his shirt slipping from his mouth when he groans out a curse. 
Just as quickly as you become distracted by the sight of Yunho jerking off, you become aware of what you’re doing. You flee the scene before you get yourself caught, exiting the farmhouse as quietly as you can. The lightbulb can wait until morning, it wasn’t that important, honestly. You’re in a daze the entire walk back to your grandparents house, goosebumps littering your arms and the image of him in such an obscene state burned into your brain. 
You fall backwards onto your bed, staring at the ceiling in hopes of willing away the path your mind is beginning to wander towards. All you can think about is the sight of him so desperate for release, large hand wrapped around his dick, abdomen contracting with need. You know you weren’t supposed to see, weren’t supposed to bear witness to something so personal. 
It’s difficult to push out the nasty, inappropriate thoughts clouding your head. His expressions contorted into absolute bliss. His slender fingers could probably do so much more than your own, could probably reach places you’d never even dreamed of. And fuck, his dick, prettier and bigger than any other you’ve ever seen. 
Your chest blushes with heat, an embarrassment washing over you when you realize you’re turned on. You should feel terrible for intruding on Yunho’s privacy like that, especially without him knowing, but all you can do is want him more than you already do. That craving for something deeper, carnal, fans the flame engulfing you, dragging you further into the sick and twisted hell you’ve created for yourself. 
Yunho has been nothing but welcoming, kind and gentle with you, someone he didn’t even know the name of until last month. Someone who’s done everything in their power to repress this lifestyle for so long. And for some reason, it just comes so easily with him. You don’t feel forced to enjoy living on the farm. He makes you laugh and puts a smile on your face effortlessly. He has you wondering if life can actually be this simple. 
But when all is said and done, there will be somebody else waiting for you back home. Somebody who doesn’t know how to whip up omurice with freshly laid eggs. Somebody who isn’t even a dog person, who thinks pets are nuisances. Somebody who doesn’t live in the farmhouse behind your grandparents’. It’s a bitter pill to swallow.
If you touch yourself with tears streaming down your cheeks to the thought of the man who has eyes that resemble the night sky, well that’s between you and whatever higher being exists out there. 
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You sit across from Yunho with bated breath, afraid that if you opened your mouth he would know your dirty secret. You avoid his eyes for the same reason, like one good look at you would reveal what you were trying to hide. 
Yunho himself was doing his best to pretend like he hadn’t masturbated to the thought of you last night. He liked to think he was good at keeping his feelings under wraps. It wasn’t like he didn’t know you were in a relationship, he’s heard you on the phone before. He stays silent as he fries rice in a pan and has some bread in the toaster. The only sounds in the kitchen are sizzling and the pants coming from Yeoreum under your stool. 
In the time that you’ve been here, never once has it been awkward between you like this. The conversation usually doesn’t stop flowing, rolling on and on and filtering into things that don’t pertain to the original subject. He rarely has his back to you for too long, turning over his shoulder to shoot you a grin every here and now. 
Both of you go to speak at the same time as a means of salvaging the morning from eternal strain. You stare at each other for a few seconds before bursting into laughter. Truly, you were two birds of a feather, or however that saying goes.
”Sorry, I don’t know why I’m being so quiet today,” Yunho says, though he knows it’s a lie. “I guess I had a long night.”
”Oh, that reminds me,” his mention of the previous night has you recalling the reason you went out to the farmhouse in the first place. “The light in my bathroom went out, do you think you can fix it for me?” 
“Yeah, for sure,” he begins preparing your plate. “Actually, I have this joke about lightbulbs. You wanna hear it?”
Your lips curl into a smile, already attempting to hold back your laughter. With a raised eyebrow, you respond, “What is it?”
”What did the lightbulb say to the light switch?” He asks nonchalantly, taking a bite from his own piece of toast. You’re failing miserably at acting like you don’t think the joke is funny, although he hasn’t even told you the punchline yet.
”I dunno, Yunho, what did the lightbulb say to the light switch?” 
“‘You turn me on.’” 
There’s a pregnant pause as the joke resonates and you can’t stop yourself from cackling at how stupid it is. He joins in, but mostly because your laughter is contagious. His chest swells with pride at his successful landing, feeling like he’s on top of the world just for bringing a smile to your face. God, he was down tremendously bad. 
Your spoon clatters onto the counter as you lean over, a hand clapped over your mouth as your boisterous laughing simmers into a giggle. Yunho leans into you slightly, matching your energy as he munches on his toast. This is what has you conflicted, so at war with yourself. The proximity should have you pulling away, but something about him always reels you in, despite the consequences that await.
And unfortunately, those consequences come to a head today.
“Are you fucking serious, Y/N?” 
You and Yunho jump back, whipping towards the source of the voice. Seojun stands there, his bags at his feet and his face crestfallen, disbelief written all over it. He shakes his head and turns to leave, you stumbling off of the barstool to follow behind him. The guilt you’ve only ever felt momentarily settles deep in your chest and deep in your stomach, though you technically haven’t done anything wrong.
Your abruptness startles Yeoreum and she’s up in a heartbeat, tailing behind you curiously. Yunho has to rush to stop her, but a part of himself wants to do the same. No matter how much he likes you, he’s never wanted to be the cause of your relationship falling apart. He wanted you organically, not like this.
”Seojun! Wait!” You call after him, holding up a hand to block out the harsh sunlight, tripping over your slippers. He scoffs. 
“What am I waiting for? You to spew some bullshit about how nothing’s going on between the two of you? I’m not fucking stupid, Y/N. I’m not blind.” He pops open his trunk and throws his bags in haphazardly.
”You’re being unreasonable,” you exclaim, rounding the car so you’re directly in front of him. “There is nothing going on. We’ve just gotten to know each other since we live in the same vicinity. Did you want me to stay here for three months and hole myself away with no other human contact?”
“He was just supposed to be the guy who lived in the farmhouse. He wasn’t supposed to bother you. That’s what you told me, remember?” Seojun is losing his patience, something that has always been the root of the problem when you’ve gotten into past arguments. “How do you expect me to react when I come to surprise you and see you being so close to another man?”
“I was laughing at a joke he told me. You’re making this a bigger deal than it is and blowing everything completely out of proportion. I’m sorry that it never came up that we became friends, but I didn’t do anything wrong. I’ve never once cheated on you in the three years we’ve been together and for you to accuse me of that is so fucking low of you.” You’re not going to cry, not going to give him the satisfaction of knowing he’s won. He thrives off of seeing your vulnerability and you won’t let him have it. 
“I saw the way he was looking at you,” he seethes, balling his hands into fists at his sides. “I know that look because that’s how I used to look at you.”
A laugh devoid of any humor leaves you and he blinks. “That’s how you ‘used to’ look at me? When did you stop? And why am I just finding this out?”
”That’s not— that isn’t what I meant, Y/N—“
”No, Seojun. You did,” you glance away from him, nipping at the inside of your cheek. “We’re grasping for straws. We aren’t going anywhere anymore and we haven’t for a while now. That’s why we're standing here arguing over this. I just want to know why you didn’t just tell me.”
”I’m too complacent,” he sighs, breathing through his nose. “I was too comfortable with you and I didn’t know how to let you go or walk away. But you’re right, there isn’t anything for us to save, and it seems like we’re both ready to move on.”
“What does that mean?” 
“I saw how you were looking at him, too. You might not have acted on it, but you have feelings for him. I’m not gonna stay and hold you back.” Seojun unlocks his car, opening the door. “And for what it’s worth, you won’t be wasting your time.”
You don’t respond, instead humming and letting him drive off. Once his car is far enough out of your view, you go back into the house. There’s an indescribable emotion that hostages you, binding your wrists and tying you down metaphorically. You can’t seem to shake it. 
Yunho is still in the kitchen, sitting on the floor with Yeoreum to keep her calm. He gazes up at you expectantly and you feel the tears you were suppressing from Seojun bubbling up. If you weren’t going to cry in front of your (now ex) boyfriend, you definitely weren’t going to cry in front of him. 
With a trembling exhale, you force yourself to say, “I need to be alone.”
He understands empathetically, clipping on Yeoreum’s leash and leaving the house in the same breath. That in itself has you crying like a baby the moment you’re all by yourself. You hold your face in your hands, body shuddering with each sob you release. 
I saw the way he was looking at you. 
I saw how you were looking at him, too. 
You had a lot to think about, and everything always seemed to circle back to Jeong Yunho. 
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A couple days escape you before you register you haven’t seen much of Yunho. After your breakup with Seojun, you really did need a bit of room to process it all, but you hadn’t realized just how much you depended on the cowboy’s presence until you were missing it. 
You hadn’t meant to push him away, if that’s how he saw it. A night of bawling your eyes out with a pint of ice cream and The Vow was enough to cure you. However, it appears that he thought you needed more, going as far as putting a pin in your daily breakfast ritual. You aren’t sure how to extend an olive branch when you weren’t even trying to cause a rift between you in the first place. 
Being with someone for three years may not seem like a lot, but that fraction of your life is stuck with you, like a thumbtack that refuses to come out of the wall. You’d had boyfriends before Seojun, but they weren’t nearly as serious. There weren't formal introductions between parents, no late night conversations that bleed into early mornings, no sleepovers and quick kisses before work. 
Of course, after a certain point, those had just become habitual. You weren’t doing them because they evoked a sense of love or care anymore, but rather because you were familiar with them. It was safer to continue the pattern of waking up and falling asleep to Seojun on the other side of the bed, the intrusion of sunlight and the cacophony of traffic outside your window, even if you didn’t really want to. 
And then you came here. 
Somehow, returning to your grandparents’ farm was exactly what you needed to break through that cycle. As much as you would love to attest it to your location and discovering the appreciation your family wanted you to feel for it, you know the real reason. It’s all thanks to a certain cowboy.
Yunho’s feelings for you run far deeper than he could’ve imagined. He doesn’t know the extent of what happened with you and Seojun, but he thinks putting distance between you is better in the long run anyway. On the off chance you’re still together, he wants to preserve his heart. He’s handed it to someone else too easily in the past and he doesn’t want to make that mistake with you if you don’t feel the same. 
But even on the off chance that you’ve broken up, he still wants to stop himself from falling further and harder than he already has. Without ill will, he doubts that you would give up the life you have in the city for this, for him. He’ll be perpetually chained to being a faint imprint on your memory of the summer. You’ll think back to the months you spent here and he’ll have played only a minor role. 
It was wishful thinking, too hopeful of him to presume this would lead to a happy ending. You were from different worlds, led different lives. It was time for him to be realistic. And that meant implementing the space that was supposed to exist between you from the get go. 
Though, you make it difficult when he bumps into you on the way back from the mailbox. Déjà vu, anyone?
Yeoreum is excited to see you, jumping onto her haunches to lick your face when you kneel to her level. You giggle, squeezing one eye shut as you balance yourself and hold her still so her weight doesn’t clamber you both onto the ground. Your fingers pet to top of her head softly as you coo, “Who’s a good girl?”
Yunho physically winces when his chest tightens at the sight of his two favorite girls. The word ‘distance’ bounces around his head like a pinball, reminding him what he’s supposed to be doing. He just can’t bring himself to walk away. Especially when you look at him with those pretty eyes of yours. 
“Hey…” You start, steeling your tone to ensure it’s even. “I’m sorry if it seemed like I was avoiding you or something. I needed some time to myself to figure things out. It wasn’t my intention to shut you out and put you on the back burner.”
”No, it’s okay. I had to figure stuff out on my own, too,” he uses his bandana to dab at the sweat perspiring on his forehead. “Did you sort through whatever you needed to?”
“I did,” you nod, standing upright. “Seojun and I broke up, so I had to sit with my feelings for a bit. We’ve been together for so long, I think I needed to remember what it was like to be without him, and then I realized that’s basically what I’ve been doing since I came here.”
”Oh.” Yunho’s lips form an ‘O’ shape, hands dragging down the sides of his pants. “I’m sorry— um— about your breakup.”
”Don’t be,” you smile, dismissing his sympathy. “It was a long time coming, honestly. We weren’t really in the relationship wholeheartedly anymore. There wasn’t a point in stringing it along, you know? But that’s enough about me, did you figure your own things out?”
”I thought I did,” he says, which is true considering he’d been mulling over what to do with his emotions subsequent to your argument with your ex. “And then I kinda steered off course. It’s alright, though, I think I like the new conclusion I’ve come to a lot better.”
You might be on the same page now, but there was an entire discussion that had to happen to solidify that. Following a very emotionally charged past couple days, you could do without that today. You’re both just glad that the air is cleared and you can resume building the bond that began forming the moment you stepped foot onto the farm, no restrictions whatsoever.
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“Have you ever ridden a horse?” 
You glance up from your book, this time genuinely reading it as Yunho fed the chickens and cleaned up their coop. He towers over you while he asks the question, his shadow thwarting off any direct sunlight. Your nose scrunches. 
“When I was in, like, middle school? It’s been a minute,” you answer, making sure to bookmark the page you stopped at. “Why?
”Would you let me teach you how to do it again?” He nips at his lower lip, like he’s nervous you’ll say no. The truth of the matter is you’d say yes even if he asked you to commit arson, which is kind of a problem.
“That sounds fun,” you shrug. “What time should I be ready?”
”Uh, now?” 
Okay, so sitting on a horse did not seem this scary when you were twelve.
It probably had to do with you being fearless and whatnot, but also because you did whatever your grandparents asked just to appease them. The faster you got off the damn horse, the faster you could go back inside and situate yourself in front of the TV. They thought they were making progress with you, but really you were outsmarting the outsmarters. 
Sweat glazes on the underside of your hands, disrupting the security of your grasp on the reins. Yunho thought it would be wiser if he stayed on foot, guiding you and the horse around the perimeter of the pen. You hoped you didn’t look as afraid as you were, but you’re certain the slight quiver of your bottom lip gives it away. 
“You’re doing fine, Y/N,” he reassures, maintaining a comforting amount of eye contact with you.
”Am I? Or does it just seem that way because you’re pulling the horse?” You quip, gripping the reins tighter when it steps over a rock and you sway a little. Your tone is laced with sarcasm, something Yunho hasn’t heard much of from you since you’ve met, but he thinks it’s cute that you resort to violence when you’re scared.
You notice the quirk of his mouth and how he’s trying not to laugh at your terror. It pisses you off solely because his humor isn’t unwarranted. You are being a bit over dramatic. He unties his bandana from around his neck and tosses it to you. “So you don’t callus your hands.”
He’s too thoughtful, too considerate for his own good, but that’s what roped you in. Even when you met for the first time, he had you figured out. The longer you stare at him, the more you realize just how perfect he is. If you were still in school and you were tasked with writing an essay about the summer you spent here, you’re sure the words would flow onto the pages flawlessly, without skipping a beat. Your prose would be so beautifully written, that even the most notable authors would be envious of your experience.
The only downside of this was the fact that time was beginning to seep through your fingers. There was mutuality in your feelings for each other, that was almost unequivocal. You were both just hesitant in taking that first leap. The uncertainty lied with that goodbye at the end of August, the one that’ll hurt a lot more than it was supposed to. But you know that postponing your unceremonious declaration of feelings would just do more harm than anything else. 
One consistency you’ve singled out since coming back to the farm is this common theme of divine intervention, or fate, whatever you want to call it. Right when you’re on the brink of an epiphany, you’re always forcefully shoved into it, like a freight train crashing into its platform traveling at full speed. This moment is no different. 
Yeoreum barking at a squirrel on the other side of the pen scares the horse who’s back you were currently on. It bucks up and you release the reins in alarm. You fall quickly, but Yunho’s quicker, catching you in his arms like it’s been a childhood dream of his to be a superhero. He searches your face for any indication that you might be hurt, a hand coming up to cup your cheek. 
The eyes you’ve grown to adore examine your own with so much care that you find yourself melting in his hold. Your face instinctively leans into his palm, fingers still clutching the fabric of his shirt like he may drop you. 
It’s nearly second-nature to minimize the gap between you. 
You never understood what novelists meant when they described kissing scenes. And you think that’s because you’d never truly had a kiss like this before. It was as if they were all talking about this second, this blip in time. The sparks that shoot from where your lips meet to the tips of your fingers, the thump-thump-thump of your heartbeat in your ears, the sensation of never wanting to escape, never wanting to stop. 
Yunho’s hand snakes behind your head, tangling in your hair to deepen the connection. It’s hungry. It’s desperate. It’s too much. It’s not enough. Everything that had been stacking on top of each other was leading to this, the collision that rivaled the Big Bang. You whine into his lips, an invitation but also an inquiry. 
He parts from you just so he can catch his breath, his forehead resting on yours. “Can I take you inside?”
You nod fervently. “Yes. Please.”
He wastes no time hauling you to the farmhouse. His grip on your wrist is gentle as he pulls you into his bedroom, sitting on the edge of the bed and trapping you between his legs. Your restraint wears thin, nimble fingers fumbling with the rest of the buttons on his denim shirt. You push it off of his shoulders, a bit shell shocked when you discover that he’s wearing a regular t-shirt as opposed to his usual tank top. 
“You would pull something like this today of all days,” you laugh breathily, untucking the shirt from his pants. He reciprocates the sentiment, pressing a kiss to the side of your neck while you undress him. 
“Is it evil of me to say I was sorta hoping this would happen?” He speaks into your exposed collarbone, nipping, sucking, biting the skin. Your appreciative sigh goads him, his tongue gliding across the abused surface as a form of relief. 
“Mm-mm,” you hum, shaking your head, fast to yank off his shirt and run your nails down his abdomen. “I’ve been waiting for this for too long.”
“Yeah?” Yunho flips the two of you easily so you’re the one on the bed now. He pushes up the hem of your shirt, pecking your stomach to your clavicle as he shows more and more of your skin until the fabric is removed from your body. “Can’t believe I finally get to have you.”
You involuntarily moan, completely untouched and because of his words alone. Every part of you feels like it’s lit ablaze, burning with want and need and everything in between. This ran further than just what-ifs and late night fantasies. Your relationship with Yunho tiptoed on the edge of something you’ve never known before, and that makes this so much more special. 
He glances up at you when his fingers reach for the button of your shorts, a silent ask for permission. You give him the green light and hold yourself up on your elbows, watching with your breathing trapped in your throat as he rids of your panties along with them. His hands push your knees to your chest, kissing your inner thighs and right around the place you need him most, but never there. 
“Yunho…” You warn, but it comes across as a broken whimper rather than an establishment of authority. He laughs and then his lips are pressing to your clit, a sweet kiss that has all rationality taking a vacation from your brain. Your head tips back and you fist at the sheets. 
He drags his tongue through your folds, swirling it around the sensitive bundle of nerves each time it makes its return. It’s almost criminal how good it feels to have his mouth on your cunt, eyes already heavy lidded with pleasure. He sucks on your clit at the same time he decides to insert a finger into your entrance, curling it experimentally just because he can. Like you predicted, it reaches that spongy spot at the crook of your pussy, brushing it once he’s sure he’s found it. 
While you walked in on him fucking his fist, the only thing on his mind was you. He was so absorbed in the mental image of what you would look like beneath him, wiggling, writhing, squirming with indulgence. His social awareness was at a zero. This replayed over and over until he came, his thoughts so vivid he could’ve swore it was real.
But this, the actual thing, was so much better; his forearm pinning your hips down, his middle finger curling and uncurling inside of you, his mouth working overtime to inch you towards the edge of that steep cliff. He moans when your eyebrows practically coalesce, bottom lip trapped between your teeth. You look so gorgeous like this, so disoriented all because of the bliss he was providing. The vibrations of the sound have you arching your back, uncontrollable whines running from your mouth.
“Feel good?” Yunho asks, disconnecting his mouth and replacing it with his other hand, ring and middle digits swiping across your clit with practiced pressure. 
“Mhm,” you nod frantically, eyes on the brink of rolling to the back of your head. “Feels so good, Yun… Just like that, ‘m almost there.”
That’s all he needs to hear, switching his hand and mouth once again, focusing on alternating harsh and gentle sucks of your clit, adding a second finger to pump in and out of your hole. The doubled change in stimulation knocks the wind out of you, the precipice of your orgasm so close you can taste it. You’d never been brought to the summit this early in the past, and you think Yunho deserves some sort of reward for being the first to do so.
You’d worry about that later though, because you’re blindsided by it before you can even conjure your next thought. You cum with a cry, tears springing to your eyes from the immense amount of ecstasy coursing through your veins, swimming in your bloodstream. Yunho coos at you, not stopping until you’ve relaxed in his hold. “That’s it, baby, you’re doing so well.”
The praise makes your head feel airy, like empty space unoccupied by anything. If you paid attention in chemistry, then you’d know that’s highly impossible, but you didn’t. The only chemistry you even remotely care about is the one between you and Yunho, the tension that has piled higher and higher for days on end until its crescendo now. 
You sit up to kiss him roughly, savoring the taste of yourself on his lips. He smiles into it, a hand raising to caress the underside of your jaw. He climbs onto the bed, scooting you up so you’re positioned by the pillows. It doesn’t take much effort for your bodies to swap, his back to the headboard. You clumsily seat yourself on his lap, a knee on either side of him and sighing wistfully when his mouth trails down your throat and sternum, slender fingers sneaking behind you to unclasp your bra.
He aids you in removing his pants, still simultaneously prioritizing kisses all over your bare chest. When you’re both fully naked, you take your time admiring his cock. It’s just as pretty as you remember, long and thick. Your hand wraps around it gingerly, stroking the length as you lean down to kiss him again. You don’t think you could ever get enough of his lips on your own. 
“I’m not exactly getting any action over here, so I don’t have any condoms,” he says into your kiss, voice no louder than a whisper. 
“That’s okay,” you run your fingers through his hair. “Wanna feel you anyways, all of you.”
”Fuck, Y/N, you can kill a man with those words.” He groans, nails digging into your hips. You giggle, but it’s interrupted by him sitting you fully, his dick slipping through your lower lips. A whine brushes his ear when the tip catches your clit, repeating the movement until you can’t stay still.
The closest you’ll ever get to Heaven on earth is Yunho’s cock pushing inside of you, filling you up so deliciously you think you could die like this. Your jaw slackens, hands coming up to support yourself on his shoulders. Even if this is a one time thing, something that never happens again during your stay at the farm, he wants you to remember this when you go back home. He wants you to recall this sliver in your timeline and never forget it, wants his name engraved in your memory like a branding iron.
Once he feels you’ve adjusted to him well enough, he pulls you off of him almost entirely, just to ram back in without mercy. He punches a voluminous moan from you, eyes watching where he disappears in you and reemerges. You’re tighter and so much warmer than he dreamed you’d be, but it’s perfect. You suck him in like a vacuum, as if his cock was made to be inside of you, as if you didn’t want him to part from you.
“You’re s-so deep, Yun,” you mewl, pulling him in for another headache-inducing kiss. “Don’t wanna stop.”
He exhales through his nostrils, mumbling out a curse when your walls squeeze around him. He wanted to last a while for you, wanted to hold out and prolong this moment until you were both on the crest of passing out. But you feel like a glove, your silk-adjacent cunt begging for more and more. 
“Think I might cum soon, princess,” he groans, tossing his head back and just about losing every ounce of his sanity when your lips start marking the column of his throat. 
His big hands move under your thighs, holding you in place so he can fuck up into you. The pace at which his cock drills in and out of your pussy has you seeing stars, eyes snapping shut and nothing but colorful spots decorating your vision. You were already abhorrently sensitive following your first orgasm, so it didn’t really take much to introduce the second. 
Your hips stutter and it washes over you like a tidal wave, your body shuddering and collapsing into his top half. He pulls out of you quickly, mouth stationed by your ear as he jerks himself off until he’s painting your backside. He moans, a lot like the sounds he was making the other night, and you feel the need to just kiss him again. 
Your lips lock sweetly, a stark contrast to your previous actions. Yunho curves a hand on your cheek, seperating from you the smallest distance so he can admire you. The smile that etches onto his expression makes you dizzier than anything else. However, the cutesiness can only span so long before the setting gives way. 
Yunho’s hand snakes in between you, his forefinger sliding up and down your slit teasingly. Your breath comes out shaky, your face finding purchase in the crook of his neck. He replaces the digit with his middle finger, parting your pussy lips in search of your clit. It doesn’t take him very long to find it, rubbing tight circles into the engorged skin. You moan into his shoulder, resting your forehead on it to see the way he works your cunt. 
“You’re so wet, baby. Have I not fucked you enough?” He whispers into your ear huskily. Yunho talking dirty to you is something you didn’t know you needed in your life. His finger slips downward, thrusting up into your hole with ease. He keeps massaging your clit with his palm, the stimulation making your head woozy.
“Mmmph— Yun, god. Feels too good.” You whine, gyrating your hips on his hand. 
“Is that right, babe?” He encourages, adding a second finger and increasing the speed of their thrusts, almost like you hadn’t been in this position already. “I can’t wait to feel this tight little pussy around my cock again. Gonna fuck you harder than the last.”
Your whimpers raise in volume, focusing on the way he curls his digits in you, applying pressure with the heel of his palm to the circles he’s rubbing into your clit. You can sense your third orgasm approaching, warmth flooding your cheeks at how embarrassingly fast he worked you back up. Your walls clench around his fingers, alerting him of how close you are. He pauses, worming his body down so his face is eye level with your cunt again.
Yunho does the whole teasing thing a second time, kissing and suckling the hot skin of your belly, knowingly denying you of your release. You grab a handful of his hair, tugging at the ends to spur him on. He groans, giving into you and licking a straight line up your slit. He inserts both fingers again, this time using his tongue to manipulate your swollen clit.
The heat of Yunho’s mouth makes your insides ache, the necessity to cum intensifying. You keen loudly, desperately, needily, the sight of the brunette between your legs so incredibly arousing. He sucks on your throbbing clit, his long fingers as deep as they can go, and you crumble. 
“Oh my god— oh my god— I’m cumming! I’m—” You cut yourself off, convulsing under him. He laps up as much of your juices as he can, coating his chin with your release. You moan as you pull him towards you to unify your lips, a mixture of your saliva and cum connect your mouths in strings. At this point, the sex is messier than anything you could’ve plucked from your wildest dreams. 
One hand trails down your body, using your nimble fingers to play with your sensitive clit when he starts fisting his cock in preparation to enter your pussy again. You use your free hand to scratch at his contracting abs. He hisses, propping himself up with one arm next to your head and his eyes trained on the way you finger yourself at the same time. You can feel his breath on your cheeks and being in this proximity to him fuels your yearning.
“Please, Yun… Need you back inside of me,” you whimper. Rubbing your clit with your own fingers isn’t satisfying enough, not with him here in front of you, not when you know how good he can make you feel.
“Fuck, baby, when you beg like that I don’t know if I can hold back.” He chuckles lowly. It rumbles from his chest, shooting to your core. 
“So don’t,” you rouse. “This is more than just a one time thing for me, Yunho.”
His eyes widen just a bit, your confession catching him off guard. That’s all he needs to line himself up with your hole, hooking his forearm under your knee as he slides in, stretching your cunt so perfectly with his perfect cock. “Shit— you’re so tight, princess… It’s almost like I didn’t just fuck you within an inch of your life.” He moans and spreads your legs wider. He bottoms out with a grunt, throwing his head back from the feeling of your velvety walls. A near deafening cry is ripped from your vocal cords. He nips at your neck, starting to piston his hips. 
His thrusts don’t slow but become calculated, speeding up and diving deep simultaneously. It only took a short amount of time to figure out what you liked and he used it to his advantage. Yunho hikes your knee to your chest, groping your tits with his free hand. He twists and tugs at your nipples just hard enough that it contributes to your pleasure rather than hurts you.
It’s as if he doesn’t feel buried inside of you sufficiently, because he decreases his pace to press and fold your other leg up, his hips ramming into your ass with each thrust now. The tip of his cock kisses at what feels like your cervix. That familiar coil begins to fasten again, keening with every drive into your cunt. The squelching noises would’ve made you cower in shame with anyone else, but with Yunho it turns you on further.
You moan, and he flattens his hand on the lower part of your stomach. Yunho groans, biting the skin where your shoulder meets your neck. Your fingers find your clit again, circling insatiably to get yourself off. 
“You gonna cum for me again?” He rasps, his hold on your legs almost painful. The backs of your thighs burn, but you endure it for the sake of the moment. You reach up and behind yourself, grabbing at the headboard in an attempt to match his force. 
“Oh my god, yes— yes yes yes yes,” you babble, the syllables blurring together like your mind. “Gonna cum so hard for you, Yunho. Keep going, please.”
His lips attach to yours, tongues tangling sloppily. The position you’re in is on the opposite end of the spectrum from how you were expecting this summer reunion to go. Had you not been made aware of Yunho living here at the last minute, you probably would’ve backed out of your commitment to staying. Deep down you’re a little too thankful that your grandmother mentioned him when it was too late to reconsider. 
“I think I’m in love with you, Y/N,” Yunho whispers into your mouth. 
You let go of the headboard, cupping his jaw and kissing him lovingly. “Me too.”
Your fingers speed up and so do his thrusts, perfectly timed with each other to shove you both towards your highs. You’re on the cusp of falling apart, arching into him to close the gap between your bodies. 
“Wanna cum inside you. Can I?” Yunho grunts. 
“Yes yes, please. Fill me up, Yun, want all of you.” 
He continues to abuse your cunt, pounding into you like his life depended on it. You sob, clamping your walls around him. He freezes, suddenly spilling into you. “Come on, baby, cum on my cock.” The warmth of his release and his words coax your orgasm, the fluttering of your cunt milking every single drop from him that it can. Even with his dick plugging you up, you can feel it dripping out of you and onto the sheets below. 
He rocks into you languidly until you’ve calmed down enough for him to pull out. His forehead is flush on your chest, rising and falling with it, both of you so spent from the intense physical activity you engaged in. You stare up at the ceiling with heavy eyelids, carding your fingers through his hair to soothe him. 
“You meant what you said right? About this not being a one time thing.” Yunho says hesitantly, like he’s afraid of permeating the atmosphere you created. 
“I don’t think I can go home at the end of the summer and forget the way I feel for you, Yunho.” You admit out loud. There had been a constant struggle in your head over whether or not to follow your heart, but as he looks at you with those sparkly eyes of his, you know your answer. And you feel a little stupid for ever considering the counter. 
“And what exactly are those feelings?” He pushes, folding his hands on your sternum and laying his cheek on top. You giggle, brushing his hair out of his view. As tempting as it was to divulge your theatrical journey in assessing your emotions, you’re too exhausted to stay awake. It would have to wait for another day. 
“You have the rest of the summer to find out, cowboy.”
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© yunhoszn. do not steal, claim, or repost. 
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milksnake-tea · 10 months
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━━ under the lotus leaves.
You've known Dan Feng long before he became the High Elder of the Vidyadhara, before he donned the title of Imbibitor Lunae and became the legend he is known as now. Long ago, back when the two of you were mere children, playing in the waters of the Xianzhou Luofu.
imbibitor lunae (dan feng) x gn!reader
contains: childhood friends au, set before dan feng is a criminal, slow burn, long fic, ooc!character for the first half bc he's growing up and is an annoying teen, mentions of blade's real name, death, spoilers for 1.2
genres: mostly fluff, hurt/comfort, some angst bittersweet ending
word count: 8.6k
a/n: please do note that this is dan feng, not dan heng. and therefore i take a lot more liberties with how he is because i firmly believe that dan feng was more of a bitch than dan heng BYE ALSO THIS IS UNEDITED !! ILL EDIT IT TMRW WHEN I WAKE UP I JUST HAD TO GET THIS OUT BYE
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Your best friend was an extraordinary being.
There was no doubt about it. Regarded as both the strongest and wisest of your people, he was chosen as the High Elder, Imbibitor Lunae. And he has served you well.
His feats are plenty, with his joining the esteemed High-Cloud Quintet, and you couldn't count the amount of time he'd saved the Xianzhou on one hand. He was smart, intelligent, and witty, quick to understand situations and formulate the best solutions. His enemies feared his presence on the battlefield, and his friends trusted him with their lives.
As did you.
You, a mere civilian. A single face among thousands of Vidyadhara, another footstep among the crowd. You, who have lived through his past and present. You, who knew him better than he knew himself.
You, who has been by his side since the very beginning.
It was a stormy day when you first met Dan Feng.
You were just a child back then, a Vidyadhara only eight years of age. Normally, at this stage in your life, you'd be guided by the current high elder, but it seems that you had undergone your cycle at the same time as the past high elder.
So as life would have it, you would instead be raised by your seniors, while the Preceptors tended to the newly reborn high elder. A skilled weaver in your past incarnation, you were taken in by your then coworkers, and raised within your craft of making lotus silk.
As such, your childhood was filled with looms, lotus flowers, and spinning threads. You spent your free time in the gardens of lotus flowers, hiding from your caretakers amongst the tall stems and diving into the waters to swim amongst them. You may not have had the draconic features of the High Elder, but you still adored the water like any other Vidyadhara.
And as it would seem, so did the High Elder.
It had been a hot and sunny day at the Luofu. The rays were smoldering on your back as you waded through the lotus fields, thankful for the cold water splashing against your legs. You squinted against the sun, adjusting your leaf hat on your head. Tucked against your arm was a woven basket filled with lotus stems, all of which would have fiber extracted from them.
The tall leaves and flowers of the lotuses dwarfed your child self in comparison, although you weren’t complaining. Although the water sloshed around your thighs, requiring you to roll up your pants more than your older coworkers, the leaves served as temporary relief from the sun’s rays.
You pushed stems aside, the field looking more akin to a jungle to you. You only needed one more before you could return home to the comfort of an air conditioner in order to extract the fibers for the threads. Thankfully, that wouldn’t have to wait long.
Once you found a suitable stem to harvest, you snapped it from its roots and began to wash it in the water. Your basket floated next to you, you keeping an eye on it to make sure it wouldn’t float away.
But then, you heard the stems rustle, and the waters splashing as something entered your field. Immediately, you stood up straight, holding the lotus stem more like a weapon than a crop.
“Who’s there?” you called out, your voice ringing through the silent and tranquil fields.
No response.
You huffed, carefully setting down your stem in the basket. Whoever it was probably thought you weren’t a threat merely because of your age. You’d prove them wrong.
You heard the stems rustle one more time, snapping your head towards the source. Picking up your basket, you marched over to a large clump of lotuses, a perfect hiding spot (you would know, you’ve used it many times before). A shadow around your size moved within them, submerging itself into the water.
You rolled your eyes. Another kid, then. 
Pushing the stems aside, you saw the flicker of a draconic tail splashing the water, almost wagging as its owner lay face-first in the murky water. Without a second thought, you set aside your basket, grabbed the tail with your grubby little hands, and pulled hard.
“OW!”
The tail’s owner toppled out of the water, crashing into you in the process and knocking your foreheads together. You yelped, falling into the water with a splash as you held your aching forehead.
“What was that for?!” A child-like voice, much like your own berated you, a whine in his tone.
Glaring through your tears, you shouted back at him. “That was for bumming around on my farm!”
Your victim/intruder, a young boy with long hair, met your glare with equal fire. “I wasn’t ‘bumming around’, I was just… Cooling off! It’s hot today.”
You squinted, clearly not impressed. “I don’t care what you were doing! You’re not doing it on my farm.”
He lashed his tail angrily, splashing you in the process. “I’m the High Elder. I do what I want.”
You stared at him for a good second, taking in his appearance. He was a Vidyadhara around your age, only he had draconic-like horns protruding from his head. His long black hair flowed around him, and his fancy white robes were drenched in lotus water. It would’ve been obvious to anyone that he was a noble, someone of higher standing.
“No you’re not,” you said, deadpanning. “You’re too small.”
The self-proclaimed High Elder flushed red with embarrassment, jumping to his feet.
“I’m still growing!” he insisted, stamping his feet and splashing water everywhere.
“The High Elder’s supposed to be big and powerful!” you said, throwing your arms in the air to emphasize your point. “You’re… a kid!”
“You’re a kid too-!” The High Elder froze in the middle of his sentence, his tail stiffening at the sound voices - adult voices. Quickly, he grabbed you by the collar of your robe and pulled you into the shadows of the clump.
“Hey-!” He slapped his hand over your mouth to shut you up. In retaliation, you licked at his hand, the young boy recoiling in disgust.
“Did you just lick me?!” he hissed, looking at his hand in horror. 
“You’re the one who just grabbed me-”
“Shh!!” He put a finger to his mouth, shushing you. “Be quiet! Can’t you see I’m hiding?”
“From what, the Cloud Knights?” you gasped, backing up. “Are you a criminal?!”
He gave you a look. “No! I told you, I’m the High-”
“High Elder? Are you there?”
This time, you both slapped a hand over each other’s mouths. An unfamiliar adult voice shouted over the fields, calling for the boy beside you. You both waited with bated breath as the man searched on the other side of the field, only letting go when he was far enough away.
“You weren’t lying?” you whispered excitedly, looking up at the boy with newfound respect. He crossed his arms, looking all high and mighty now.
“Why would I be lying?” he said matter-of-factly. “You were the one who didn’t believe me.”
You really wanted to make a witty comment, but then you remembered your stems, floating out in the sun. Panic seized you. You couldn’t let those stems dry. If they did, they’d be useless to you.
You jumped to your feet, hurriedly running to your stems. Thankfully, they were still where you left them, and in the shade. You sighed in relief, knowing that you would live to see another day.
You peeked your head over the lotus heads, spotting the man who was calling for the High Elder. He was wearing some pretty fancy robes himself, the robes you recognized as belonging to a Preceptor.
Cradling your basket once again, you walked back to where the High Elder was hiding. He looked up at you in surprise as you reached towards what used to be a preening lotus flower, now a pod filled with green seeds. 
You snapped it off the stem and popped out one of the seeds. After peeling the green skin to reveal the white center, you handed it to the High Elder.
“Want one?”
The High Elder was wary at first, but eventually took the seed. He chewed it in his mouth for a little bit, his eyes brightening at the taste.
“It’s sweet,” he said in surprise. You nodded, taking one for yourself before giving him the pod.
“You have the rest on this one,” you said. You pointed in the direction of the Preceptor. “The big guy looking for you is over there, by the way.”
“Oh.” He took the pod in his hands, still a bit freaked out by how it looked. “Thank you.”
“Master always said I have to make it up when I do something bad,” you said, picking up your stems. With a start, the High Elder seemed to realize that you were apologizing. “Anyway, I have to go now. The fibers will dry up if I stay out here too long.”
“Wait!” The High Elder called out, reaching for you. You turned around, raising a brow. His tail waved nervously behind him as his hand faltered. “What’s your name?”
As you answered him, in the back of your head, you could’ve sworn you’d read this scene before. 
You tilted your head curiously. “What’s yours?”
His expression was strange. It was a smile of relief and happiness, just from you not knowing his name. The waters responded to his joy, swirling gently around him.
“Dan Feng,” he said, his tail wagging slightly. “My name is Dan Feng.”
You remember seeing him dragged out of the fields a few hours later. You had been extracting fibers from the stems you’d collected when you’d heard the commotion. 
Dan Feng was having his ear talked off by the Preceptor, but he was being awfully obedient. The two of you had met gazes, and he had sheepishly waved at you. Your hands were busy with your work, so all you could do was giggle at his predicament.
Of course, that wouldn’t be the last time you saw the High Elder - far from it. 
Dan Feng would visit your farm often, whether it was for eating more lotus seeds, dragging you to go swim with him, or just to watch you work. Your mentors and coworkers grew accustomed to seeing the young Vidyadhara waiting for you outside the workshop.
All of his visits would end in the same way - a Preceptor would come and take him away for his studies, droning on about his duty as the High Elder while Dan Feng rolled his eyes behind their back.
It wasn’t like he hated his duty. You knew better than anyone that Dan Feng took pride in his role, he was just… stubborn.
“What are you doing?”
You flinched at the boy in question’s voice. Dan Feng was practically talking in your ears, his face right next to yours. You leaned away, batting away at him.
“None of your business,” you said, turning your back towards him as to hide your hands. Dan Feng pouted but didn’t push.
“If you say so.” He turned his gaze back to the open fields. His legs kicked as he dangled on the stone wall alongside you.
You sat in comfortable silence, feeling as the spring breeze blew gently around you. It was tranquil and quiet, as the lotus fields always were.
Dan Feng found he preferred it that way. It was nice to get away from the droning words of the Preceptors, and this little farm served as his favorite sanctuary. He could spend his days here forever, just being by your side.
His eyes shifted towards you again. You were oddly concentrated today, he noted, working on whatever was in your hands right now. It was unlike you to be so quiet. Usually, you’d be talking about the latest gossip you’d heard from your mentors, or complaining about the weather again.
He strained his neck, trying to see just what was taking your attention away from him. But alas, you saw him and snatched it away from him again. Frustrated, he blew at his hair, lashing his tail in impatience.
Oh, well. If you weren’t going to show him, you weren’t going to show it. It wasn’t like he wanted to see it anyways.
Dan Feng went back to spacing out, closing his eyes, crossing his legs, and focusing on the world around him. If he wasn’t going to do anything, he might as well meditate.
He reached his senses into the fields, losing himself in the environment. His ears were filled with the rustle of each individual leaf, the soft splashing of water, the croak of the frogs, and the buzzing of insects that inhabited the fields.
He could feel how the wind felt on every plant, the warmth of the sun not just on his skin, but on the skin of the other aquatic animals. At that moment, Dan Feng became one with the world. Nothing could break his concentration.
Nothing, except perhaps for you, who was trying to grab his hand as stealthily as possible.
Dan Feng snapped his eyes open when you took his left hand in yours. Apparently, you were too engrossed in your task to notice his eyes on you.
You slid something onto his ring finger. Dan Feng tilted his head, raising his hand to stare at whatever it was you put on him.
A band of woven grasses encircled his finger, the braid intricate and tight. Dan Feng looked at it in confusion, rotating his hand to get a better view of it.
“Do you like it?” you said proudly.
“What is it?” he asked, bringing it to his face to observe.
“It’s a ring,” you said obviously. You showed him your dominant hand, which had a matching ring on it. “I saw a couple of girls the other day with those friendship bracelets. I figured since we’ve known each other for a few years now, we should have something like that too.”
“Oh.” Dan Feng blushed at your words, a giddy feeling bubbling within his chest. Suddenly, the ring on his finger felt heavier, but also much, much warmer.
“It’s nice, right?” you hummed, holding your hand to the sky. “I mean, it’s not like one of those beads you can just buy, but I think it’s pretty special.”
“I love it.” Dan Feng beamed softly, holding his hand close to his chest. “I’ll treasure it forever.”
It melted your heart to see him so ecstatic over something as simple as a grass ring. He was quite literally glowing from happiness, his draconic parts illuminating with a soft sea green.
“I’m glad,” you said, hugging your knees to your chest. 
Dan Feng looked at you, gratitude brimming in his eyes. He didn’t reach out to hug you (although he certainly wanted to), but rather, only wrapped his tail around your waist, tugging you closer to him.
You loved Dan Feng, you really did. But sometimes, you really wanted to tie him up and throw him in a ditch.
You sigh loudly in frustration, jabbing at Dan Feng’s wound with an alcohol-infused pad. The boy in question hissed in pain at your actions.
“Would it kill you to be gentler?” he attempted to jolt away, but your hold on his arm was firm.
It had been many years since you two had first met. The two of you were adolescents now, nearing adulthood.
Dan Feng had appeared at your doorstep after training once again to escape his mentors, only this time with a bloodied gash on his shoulder. He’d tried to hide it from you, but to little success.
“Why didn’t you tell anyone about this?” you shot back, angrily wrapping his wound with bandages. Dan Feng averted his gaze.
“It wasn’t anything they needed to know,” he said quietly. You paused in your wrapping to stare at him incredulously.
“Are you kidding me?!” You pulled on the bandages, tightening them. Dan Feng winced at your loud voice, waving his hand for you to quiet down. Granted, you did, but you still decided on berating him.
“Feng'er, this is serious,” you said through gritted teeth. “It’s not one of those scratches you can just lick away. What if it had gotten infected?”
Dan Feng sighed, opting to stay silent and instead watch you work. Despite your harsh tone, he knew that you were just worried about him. He didn’t blame you, the wound was pretty serious.
His eyes softened as he saw your hands trembling as they worked. Your face was a mask of angry calm, but he could see the shake in your eyes.
“...sorry.”
You blinked. “What was that?”
Dan Feng dropped his gaze guiltily. “I’m sorry. I made you worry.”
“When do you not make me worry?” you joke, tying the bandage into a bow. Dan Feng smiled sheepishly.
“I’m sorry,” he repeated, touching your hand with his tail. “How should I make it up to you this time?”
“Hm…” You pondered the question, tapping at your chin before brightening with an idea. “I got it. How about showing me that little trick you were bragging to me about earlier, with the cloudhymm?”
Dan Feng laughed airily. “You always ask for that.”
“Well, no one around here knows cloudhymm except for you,” you said, crossing your legs on the floor. Your eyes practically glowed in anticipation - Dan Feng wanted to compare you to a puppy awaiting a treat. 
The thought made his lips twitch as he held back his laugh. You rolled your eyes playfully, nudging him eagerly.
“So pushy,” he said dramatically, but you knew he was just teasing. He sat up straight, smoothed out his robes, and without further ado, he began his personal spectacle for you.
With just a flick of his finger, water materialized around him, taking the form of white lotus flowers in the air. Droplets stilled, as though someone had stopped time in the middle of a rainstorm.
You’ve seen this view many times before, but you were still amazed each and every time. A lotus flower hovered in front of you, bursting into a cloud of mist as you touched it.
You giggled, leaning back onto your hands, watching the lotuses drift off into the air. Unbeknownst to you, Dan Feng was preparing a whole nother surprise for you.
As your attention was captured by the lotuses, Dan Feng swirled his finger in the air. His signature teal water erupted in a spiral, taking the form of a roaring dragon. You jumped in surprise as it circled around you, flying toward the ceiling.
Dan Feng made the dragon dance around the lotuses, even bumping against your cheek. You squeaked as it did, light-heartedly glaring at Dan Feng. He only smirked back at you, before he enraptured your gaze with the dragon once again.
It glided towards the ceiling again, curling into a glowing orb of water. Dan Feng made a fist, and the dragon and the lotuses burst into a fine mist, making rainbows in the late evening light.
You were glimmering with awe, a permanent smile fixed onto your lips as you reached towards the ceiling to catch the mist. It was cool against your skin, like a little kiss from the rain.
“Am I forgiven now?” Dan Feng asked, amused.
You rolled your eyes. “Only if you promise to tell someone the next time you get injured.”
Dan Feng laughed. “Yes, yes, of course.”
You turned to look at him, only to find that he had been watching you this entire time, a fond smile on his lips.
“Are you sure about this?”
Dan Feng whispered anxiously as you skillfully maneuvered through dark alleyways and streetlights, your hand clasped tightly in his. 
He kept looking back behind him, just to make sure that you weren’t being followed. He’d changed his appearance somewhat, making sure to hide his horns and tail, but he was still paranoid.
“Obviously!” you chirped back. You didn’t bother looking back at him, currently fixated on your destination - a crowd of bright lights, the smell of food, and the chatter of people. In other words, the night market.
Dan Feng let himself be dragged off by you, trusting that you knew these streets better than he did. He looked urgently back at you.
“When we get caught-”
“If we get caught,” you corrected, stopping momentarily to pull Dan Feng towards you. You let go of his hand to hold his face, pulling him to meet yours. “You trust me, right?”
Dan Feng sighed. “Yes, but-”
You squished his cheeks, effectively shutting him up. “No ‘buts’. What happened to the kid who would sneak off to swim in my farm?”
Dan Feng gave you a look, but with his face all squished up like that, you couldn’t take him seriously. Fighting down a giggle, you squeezed him one last time before letting go.
“Trust me on this,” you insisted, the lights of the market illuminating your back. “You couldn’t have lived for this long and not have been to the night market. You’ll love it, I promise.”
“And if I don’t?” Dan Feng hummed. You snorted, interlacing your fingers with his once again.
“Then I’ll do whatever you want later, alright?”
“I’ll hold you to that.”
Dan Feng squinted as you pulled him into the depths of the market, the bright lights blinding him momentarily. The savory aroma of grilled meat and fried vegetables wafted into his nose, the chatter of friends, families, and lovers filling the air. The two of you were practically consumed by the crowd, the only thing keeping him from being swept away was your hand in his.
It was overwhelming, but not in a bad way. Dan Feng’s eyes widened with wonder as he took in the atmosphere around him. He wasn’t used to so many people being in one place, at the same time. In the lotus fields and in his palace, things were always quiet, still.
He could see children playing silly games with one another, jewelers selling their handcrafted trinkets, and so many street chefs, cooking right on the spot over open flames.
A tug on his hand broke him out of his stupor. You had been watching him all this time, a knowing smile on your face. You tugged him over to a stand that was selling what looked to be skewered balls of meat, dripping with a sweet glaze.
“They’re berrypheasant skewers,” you explained. You noticed Dan Feng’s disgruntled look and nudged him. “Don’t worry, it’s just the fruit that comes off their tails. They didn’t actually kill anything.”
“Oh… I see.” Dan Feng relaxed a bit after hearing that. You gave him a smile before talking to the vendor. Once you had acquired your skewers, you grabbed his hand once more, moving to a secluded corner of the market to enjoy them.
You wasted no time in biting off one of the fruit balls, closing your eyes in delight as you let it slowly melt in your mouth.
“That’s amazing,” you sighed in contentment, leaning back on a wall. You opened your eyes to see Dan Feng silently chewing on his. “How is it?”
“Sweet,” he said, swallowing it. “It’s not bad. Although, I prefer lotus seeds.”
“Really?” you asked, finishing off your skewer. “I like these better. Or maybe that’s because I’ve spent my whole life eating lotus seeds.”
“Perhaps,” Dan Feng agreed. He looked off in the direction of the market. “This place, it’s…”
“Loud?” you jested. Dan Feng chuckled.
“That too,” he admitted, “but the word I had in mind was ‘comfortable’.”
You hummed in agreement. “Well,” you said, pushing yourself off the wall. “We’ve only just scratched the surface. Are you ready?”
Dan Feng nodded. “Let’s go.”
Whatever happened next was a blur. What had started as you dragging Dan Feng around to try different food turned into Dan Feng pulling you to whichever jewelry store caught his attention. Sometimes, you’d lose him in the crowd, and run around panicked only to find him in the middle of getting scammed (to which you’d drag him off, giving death glares to whoever decided to prey on him).
You soon learned that this was a lot more tiring task than you’d originally anticipated. It was like babysitting a toddler - one minute he’d be standing at your side, watching you as you bargained with the vendor, and the next minute, he’d be across the street, trying on some new earrings.
And to make matters worse, every time you wanted to wring Dan Feng’s throat the second you caught up to him, he’d turn to you with that stupidly pretty smile of his, showing off whatever trinkets he managed to pick up this time.
And of course, like the weak soul you were, you couldn’t stay angry at a face like that for long.
But safe to say, you were relieved when you reached the end of the market and instead came to the edges of Central Starskiff Haven, right in front of the Jade Gate. 
Here, the crowds had parted, allowing you to take a breather from your exhausting task. Of course, you were the only one who was tired - Dan Feng was vibrating with excitement, the brightest grin you’ve ever seen on his face.
“I take it you had fun?” you said good-naturedly, coming up beside your friend to watch the flow of starskiffs in and out of the Luofu. Dan Feng nodded, crossing his arms behind him.
“Most definitely,” he said happily. “The outworlder merchants have so many interesting things, I can’t help but be intrigued by them.”
“I could tell,” you chuckled. “I could barely catch up to you with the way you were running around. Imagine what the Preceptors would say.”
“We did agree that they would never find out, no?” Dan Feng pointed out. You shrugged.
“Fair enough,” you acknowledged. You gazed out into the glowing light of the Jade Gate before suddenly jolting in realization. “Lan above, I almost forgot!”
Dan Feng looked at you questioningly as you riffled through your pockets. His confusion only increased as you pulled out a small box, barely the size of your palm.
You opened it to reveal two jade rings, each with the image of a  lotus carved into its band. Dan Feng feels his breath hitch at the sight, and something in his chest tightened.
“What…” he couldn’t even finish his sentence.
“It’s your birthday, isn’t it?” you said. “I figured that now would be a good time to replace the ones I made when we were kids.”
That’s right. You didn’t just choose today of all days randomly. Today was Dan Feng’s birthday, and the day he officially became of age. Today was the last day of his childhood before he would fully take on the title of Imbibitor Lunae and the responsibilities that came with being the High Elder.
You couldn’t help but feel proud as you watched him take the rings with shaking hands. He’s still that stubborn child who listens to no one but himself, but he’s become so much more. He’s grown taller, more mature, more dignified.
And yet, he still looked like he might cry from your gift. He mumbled something under his breath, something you couldn’t catch.
“What was that?” you asked, only to be pulled tightly into his chest. Dan Feng squeezed you into his embrace as he tried to steady his breathing.
Slowly, you wrapped your arms around his waist, melting into his hold. Such moments like these were rare, after all. The furthest Dan Feng had ever gone with you was holding hands. Hugs weren’t part of his vocabulary.
“You know…” he murmured. “In human cultures, rings symbolize marriage.”
“Well,” you laughed into his skin. “We’re not human, are we?”
“Yes, but…”
“Are you trying to propose to me, gege?” You looked up at him, raising your brow playfully. Dan Feng blushed at the nickname, averting his gaze.
“That wasn’t my intention,” he mumbled, flustered. He quickly let go of you, hiding his face behind his hand as he tried to calm his rapidly increasing heartbeat.
You snickered at him. “I know, I’m only teasing. Here, give me those; I’ll put them on for you.”
But despite your words, Dan Feng couldn’t help the burning heat that enveloped him as you took his hand delicately in yours, sliding on the ring. He couldn’t stop his heart from pounding, couldn’t stop his thoughts of newly engaged couples doing exactly what you were doing.
And most of all, he couldn’t stop thinking of how badly he wanted to kiss you in that moment.
Ever since that day, neither you nor Dan Feng have taken off your respective rings. Dan Feng always kept it hidden beneath his gloves, while you showed it off even while you worked. You’ve been asked many times who the other ring belonged to, but you’ve never given them an answer.
One of these questionees was Yingxing, a passionate young outworlder who had come to the Luofu hearing of the feats made by Vidyadhara craftsmen. You’d met through a common friend of Jingliu, one of Dan Feng’s friends in the renowned High Cloud Quintet.
While Yingxing was a blacksmith and you a weaver, the two of you hit it off immediately. The two of you bonded over creating for the members of the Quintet, with you being responsible for the threads that made up their clothes, and Yingxing their armor and weapons. Many times, when one of you had a day off, one could find you in the other’s workshop.
You coughed as smoke arose from the furnace, fanning yourself. Yingxing glanced over momentarily.
“Are you alright?” he asked, a bubbling laugh in his voice. You nodded.
“Yes, just not used to so much smoke,” you sighed. Yingxing wiped at his brow as he took out the pot from the furnace, pouring the molten metal into the mold beneath him.
“If it bothers you too much,” he advised, “you should step outside.”
You shook your head, jumping down from your spot by the window. “I’m fine, don’t worry. But enough about me, what’s this you’re making?”
“It’s a spear for the High Elder.” Yingxing moved aside as you came up next to him. “See the way the metal glows from a certain angle? That’s the remnants of the Reignbow Arbiter’s arrow.”
“Fascinating.” So this was the weapon Dan Feng would wield.
You waved away embers from your face, and for a moment, their light caught on the ring on your finger.
“You’re married?” said Yingxing in surprise. You stared at him inquisitively.
“No? What made you think that?”
“Your ring,” he said, nodding at your finger. You looked down before spurting a laugh.
“Oh, this?” You toyed with it, fidgeting it on your hand. “It’s nothing like that.”
“You don’t sound so sure,” Yingxing commented. You huff.
“I am,” you retorted, nudging him. Yingxing whined at the jab, complaining.
“Don’t you know not to provoke a man with a hammer?” he threatened good-naturedly. You, being the very mature person you are, stuck your tongue out at him.
“Yingxing?”
The sound of your best friend’s voice interrupted your play argument as the both of you perked your heads. Dan Feng bent down as he entered the forgery so as to not hit his horns on the door frame.
“Dan Feng!” Yingxing greeted, waving. “What brings you here?”
“Don’t let me disturb you,” the Vidyadhara said, his nose wrinkling at the smoke filling the forge. “I’m merely here to check on the progress of the spear.”
“It’s still in the process of being smelted, as you can see.” Yingxing pounded away at the spear, shaping it into his desired form.
“Ah, is that so?” Dan Feng nodded. “I’ll come back tomorrow, then. Keep up the good work.”
“You’re going to leave without saying hi?” you interjected, fake hurt lacing your voice. “I’m hurt, Feng’er.”
Dan Feng flinched, as though he hadn’t noticed you at all.
“[Name]?” He straightens, blinking rapidly in surprise. Yingxing swore he’d never seen the High Elder brighten so quickly - he almost didn't believe his eyes when he saw his tail wag with joy. “I apologize, I didn’t see you.”
“It’s alright,” you laugh, walking over to him. “I haven’t seen you in a while. How have you been?”
“You two know each other?” Yingxing asked. Dan Feng narrowed his eyes, fixing the younger man with a glare.
“I should be the one asking you that, Yingxing,” he said lowly, wrapping an arm around you and pulling you close. “When did you and them get so close?”
“We’ve been friends for a while,” you answered for Yingxing, lightly hitting Dan Feng’s chest. “Be nice to him.”
Dan Feng pouted, reluctantly letting you go. “But-”
“No ‘buts’,” you scolded, crossing your arms. “If you’re not going to be nice, you can step outside.”
Dan Feng looked akin to a kicked puppy, but he relented. Although, when he saw Yingxing, trying his absolute best not to laugh, Dan Feng felt murderous intent for the first time.
His tail lashed angrily behind him as he watched you converse with the blacksmith, Yingxing sweating from the pure pressure of Dan Feng’s stare. He’d never been so relieved to see you go.
“I have to go now, but I’ll come back later, alright?” you said, waving at Yingxing. You squeezed Dan Feng’s shoulder on your way to the door, leaning in to whisper in his ear. “Don’t give him a hard time, okay?”
Dan Feng only nodded, briefly touching his hand to yours before you finally left, leaving the two men alone.
“So,” Yingxing coughed, looking anywhere but Dan Feng’s eyes. “Feng’er, was it?”
“You will not speak of this,” Dan Feng warned. Yingxing raised his hands in surrender.
“My lips are sealed, High Elder.” Yingxing smiled. “Although, if I were you, I wouldn’t wait.”
Dan Feng narrowed his eyes. “What do you mean?”
“How should I say this…” Yingxing pondered. “If you stall for too long, someone will sweep them away.”
Horror shot through Dan Feng like a bullet as he gaped at Yingxing. The thought of you leaving him for someone else, replacing him, hadn’t even crossed his mind.
“I don’t know what you mean,” he gritted out, taking a deep breath to calm down. “They would never replace me.”
Yingxing blinked. “Don’t tell me you haven’t realized.” He shook his head in disbelief. “Dan Feng, you’re-”
“Dan Feng, Yingxing, there you are.”
Jingliu crossed her arms in the doorway, her apprentice, Jing Yuan by her side. 
“Was that [Name] I just saw run out?” she asked, raising a brow. She shook her head. “Nevermind that. I needed to talk to you two anyways. We’re heading out in a week’s time.”
“What for?” Dan Feng questioned, furrowing his brows.
“The Denizens of Abundance have invaded our ally Thalassa,” Jingliu disclosed, her voice tight at the mere mention of the Xianzhou’s sworn enemies. “We’ve been ordered to drive them out.”
“Very well,” said Dan Feng. “We’ll see you then, Jingliu.”
She nodded. “Until then.”
It was the first time Dan Feng had seen death.
War was never pretty for anyone, soldier or civilian. It was dirty, dark, and grimy. In war, you had two objects: one, defeat the enemy. Two, survive.
Dan Feng cursed as he ran his spear through another borison, the ocean of Thalassa responding to his anger. Dragons made from water, the same ones he showed to you all those years ago, drove back the enemy, blasting them away and incapacitating them in the process.
He kept his eyes ahead of him, deliberately avoiding the ground. There, laid corpses of allies and enemies alike.
Death was uncommon on the Xianzhou, especially for a Vidyadhara. There were no soulless eyes on the Luofu, no limp bodies littering the ground. There were no pleas for mercy, no screams of pain and fear.
But here, in the midst of a foreign battlefield, all of those horrors revealed themselves, and bared their teeth.
Dan Feng made the mistake of looking down. His eyes met with that of a deceased borison, its own lifeless eyes glazed over. Instantly, Dan Feng faltered.
The borison looked nothing but a Vidyadhara, but their eyes were the same. It might’ve been a different species, following a different Aeon, but the intelligence and sentience were the same. They were a person, just like anyone else. Just like you.
Only this one wouldn’t rebirth into a new life. No, this one was spoken for, done in by his spear. They would never live again.
The battle blurred around him as he spiraled deeper into his thoughts. He knew that realistically, it would never happen, but he couldn’t stop the thought from resurfacing in his mind.
What if one day, you ended up just like that borison?
Dan Feng shook his head, raising his spear just in time to block an attack from an enemy. No. It would never happen. He’d be there to protect you. The Cloud Knights would protect you. Xianzhou would protect you.
But what if they couldn’t?
“Dan Feng!” Jingliu’s shout snapped him out of his daze. Dan Feng clicked his tongue, irritated at his own absentmindedness. The battlefield was no place for distraction; he of all people should know this.
With a thrust of his hands, his dragons came to Jingliu’s aid, healing her wounds and fending off the borison attacking her.
He was being ridiculous, Dan Feng berated himself. The enemy was vastly overpowered. Their victory would come soon. And when it did, he would be able to come home, home to you.
And he did.
It was nighttime when he returned to the Luofu. You were just finishing up before bed, setting aside the fabrics you’d woven that day. Your former mentor had just checked in on you, making sure that you were doing alright before they went to sleep.
You heaved a heavy sigh to yourself, folding the final sheet before setting it on a shelf. Dan Feng and the others had been at war for months now.
“I wonder how they’re doing,” you muttered to yourself, closing your eyes. You knew they would be fine. Jingliu, Dan Feng, and every other member of the High Cloud Quintet were blessed with powers that you couldn’t even begin to imagine. The invading Denizens would be no match for them.
But still… You couldn’t help but worry.
What didn’t help was how obvious Dan Feng’s absence was. You often looked over your shoulder as you wove, as though expecting the young man to be standing there, watching. The night market didn’t feel the same without him being dragged around to every stall.
The lotus fields, with all their flowers and pads, seemed empty.
It was as though a hole had been ripped out of your heart, leaving only a dull ache.
The sound of your door opening startled you. You swiveled around, utterly confused. Just who would be here at this hour? Very few people had access to the key to your home. 
Perhaps one of the other weavers? Or perhaps your mentor again, worried that you weren’t getting enough sleep?
The answer was neither. A strangled whisper of your name, in such a familiar voice, cut through the night air like a knife. Tears welled in your eyes as you took in the sight of your best friend, finally home after so long.
“Feng’er?” you whispered. He nodded wordlessly, taking a few hesitant steps into your home.
You met him halfway, reaching up to hold his face delicately. Dan Feng closed his eyes for a moment, letting out a little sigh. His arm came to the small of your back, pulling you in as he buried his face into the crook of your neck, breathing in your scent.
“You’re late,” you murmured, brushing your hand through his hair. Dan Feng tightened his arms around you.
“I’m sorry.”
“You should be,” you laughed, sniffling. “Do you know how worried you made me?”
Dan Feng pulled away from your neck, gazing into your eyes. His tail swayed, eventually circling around your waist. He gingerly held your chin between his thumb and index finger as though you’d break if he was any rougher with you.
“I’m sorry,” he repeated, brows crinkling. Quickly, he wiped away your tears. Of all else, Dan Feng hated seeing you cry, and hated it even more if it was because of him. “I’m here now.”
You nodded tearfully. “And you’re not leaving, right?”
“Not for a while,” he promised. “Even the Abundance will need time to recover from the damage we did to them.”
“Good.” You held his face in your hands. “Because right now, you’re mine.”
“Is that so?” Dan Feng said softly. His eyes lingered on your lips, his lips slightly parted. “I’m yours, is that right?”
“Mhm.” You smiled as you felt him press your bodies impossibly closer together, one arm around your waist and the other behind your head. Your lips brushed against each other, your voice a whisper as you two danced on the edge. “Mine.”
A push from Dan Feng’s hand, and he sealed his lips with yours.
Immediately, you closed your eyes, savoring the taste of his kiss. His lips were soft, yet cool, like the touch of a river on a summer afternoon. He kissed you with a hidden desperation, years of pining and longing unleashing themselves in this torrent of affection. You almost couldn’t keep up with him, letting out a whimper as he tilted your face gently, deepening the kiss.
Even when you parted for air, it wasn’t long before Dan Feng greedily pulled you back in, addicted to the feeling of your lips on his. His hands wouldn’t stop wandering in a languid motion, slowly roaming all over you, from your waist to your back to your neck, and back to your waist again, squeezing every bit he could find.
By the time Dan Feng’s relentless assault ended, the two of you were breathless. Words failed to form on your tongue as you simply stared into Dan Feng’s eyes, trying to catch your breath.
Dan Feng pressed his forehead against yours, his horns bumping against you.
"You don't know how long I waited for that,” he whispered huskily. You let out a breathless chuckle, wrapping your arms around his neck and nuzzling his nose with yours.
“I think I did.”
The corners of Dan Feng’s eyes crinkled. You’ve never seen them so up close before. The colors reminded you of a stone in a river, with cool grey giving way to gorgeous teal.
And the way he looked at you made your heart melt - it’s so tender, so soft, so filled with love that you can practically feel how much he cares about you.
And you can only hope that he saw the same in your eyes.
“I love you,” he confessed, like it was a secret. But even still, him being able to say those three words made it worth more than anything in the world. “I’ve always loved you, ever since we were children.”
Joy bubbled up in your chest, and you couldn’t stop yourself from giggling. Your hand came to his scalp, bunching up his hair in your fingers.
“I love you too, you dork.” You pecked him on his nose, and then his forehead, laughing as he wrinkled his nose in response.
Reluctantly, you released him from your grasp, instead tugging his hand into your abode.
“It’s late already,” you explained. “The Preceptors won’t mind if you come home late, right?”
“They no longer control me,” Dan Feng affirmed. You grinned.
“That’s good.” You lead him into your bedroom, glancing over to make sure he was fine with it. “I don’t have a guest room, so are you alright with sharing a bed?”
Dan Feng flustered, but he nodded. “Th- That’s fine with me.”
You would learn that Dan Feng was incredibly clingy in bed. He practically enveloped you in his arms, tangling your legs together as he hugged your shoulders. His tail was conflicted - either thumping happily against the bed or wrapping around you like a possessive snake.
But it was worth all of it. You felt safe in Dan Feng’s embrace, loved. In his arms, you slept the most soundly you’ve ever slept. It was as though you had found your other half.
You truly felt blessed when you woke up to Dan Feng’s sleeping face, so serene and tranquil. And fortunately for the both of you, that wouldn’t be the last time you woke up next to the other.
But those happy days were not made to last.
There would be many more feats Dan Feng would accomplish as the High Elder. He would become one of the most prolific Vidyadhara ever, forever documenting his name in history books.
You two would eventually marry, sealing your love not just with those rings. It was a marriage in the palaces of Scalegorge Waterscape, only the best for the High Elder. All of your friends attended, Yingxing and Baiheng especially praising Dan Feng (and lamenting about how he of all people got married before they did). 
Jing Yuan had grown into a fine young man, his intellect and skill with the Lightning Lord being parallel to none. Yingxing was beginning to age, being a short-lived species. Jingliu had retired, aiming to end her days peacefully.
But as said before, that wasn’t what fate had planned for the quintet.
Jingliu would be driven mad with mara, her only solace being the blade of her former mentor. Baiheng would be missing in action. Yingxing would be killed long before his time, leaving Dan Feng in despair over losing three beloved friends so soon. 
Perhaps that is what drove him to do what he did.
“How could you?”
Dan Feng winced at the crack in your voice as you screamed at him. You were crying, angry tears streaming down your face.
“My love, please-”
“Do not call me that!” you snapped, making him flinch. “You don’t get to call me ‘my love’ after that. What were you thinking?!”
“It was the only way!” Dan Feng insisted.
“It was cruel,” you hissed. “You know that more than anyone here.”
“They stole them from me,” Dan Feng growled, his eyes flashing. “It wasn’t their time.”
“I know,” you whispered, your voice hoarse from crying and screaming. “I know it wasn’t. But you know what immortality will do to them, Feng’er. You know what the curse of Abundance does.”
Dan Feng averted his eyes guiltily. You wipe at your eyes hurriedly, taking big, gulping breaths to calm down.
“What did the Preceptors say?” you finally asked. Dan Feng’s gaze lowered, a shadow cast over his face. A pit dropped in your stomach.
“They’re waiting outside,” he revealed. “I’m to be taken to the Shackling Prison, and forced into rebirth. They only let me be here to say goodbye.”
It was as though an anvil had been dropped on you, crushing you.
“No.”
It was the only thing you could muster out. You shook your head in disbelief.
“No. No, no, no!” you croaked out. “They can’t do that. Not to you.”
Ironic, how only a few minutes prior you were berating Dan Feng as though your life depended on it. Now, you were pleading for him to be forgiven, for a lighter sentence to be dealt out. Because for a Vidyadhara, a forced rebirth was practically the same as a death sentence.
“Isn’t there another way?”
Dan Feng shook his head, taking your arms in his hands.
“I’m afraid not. This is the only way the public will forgive my sins.”
He took a deep breath.
“Please, my love,” he begged quietly. “Look at me.”
You did.
“You have to be strong,” said Dan Feng, cradling your face one last time. “Promise me that you’ll be alright, even after I am reborn.”
You shook your head. “Feng’er, please.”
“Promise me,” he urged.
“I…” You faltered. “I promise.”
Dan Feng smiled sadly - the last smile you’d ever see from your husband.
“Thank you.” He pressed a sweet kiss to your lips, a kiss to last you the lifetimes he wouldn’t be at your side. “I love you, [Name]. And I’m sorry for being such a selfish husband.”
You closed your eyes, savoring him for the last time. Silently, you told him your forgiveness.
“I love you too, Dan Feng.”
That was the day the love of your life died.
Centuries have passed since then.
You’re still weaving, now taking care of your rebirthed mentors as they had cared for you. There are children under your wing now, hoping to learn your craft and one day start a business of their own.
You still keep in touch with Jing Yuan, the general visiting your farm every so often. Each time, you offer him a taste of the lotus seeds Dan Feng loved, but each time, he refuses.
Yingxing has become the Stellaron Hunter Blade, cursed with immortality and the mara that comes with it. If he remembered you, he never showed it.
The Ambrosial Arbor, reawakened by the Denizens of Abundance, runs rampant, threatening the existence of the Luofu itself. You hear from friends that Jing Yuan had enlisted a group of outworlders - the Astral Express - to help him with the crisis.
And now, those very outworlders were standing outside your door.
“Par-” Jing Yuan coughed, cutting himself off. “Pardon the intrusion, [Name].”
He was currently being held by a young Vidyadhara, one that… Your breath hitched.
One that looked almost identical to Dan Feng.
Your lover’s lookalike noticed your gaze at him. The second you met eyes, he seemed to know exactly what was going through your mind.
“...I’m not him.” He repeated this sentence for the nth time today.
You smiled sadly.
“I know.”
You turned to Jing Yuan, taking in the general’s sorry state. The outworlders, a young girl with pink hair, an older brunette man, and a grey-haired teenager all seemed to be in similar shape, although definitely better than the general.
You stepped aside. “Why don’t you all come in? It’s been a while since I’ve had company.”
“Thank you.” The brunette, who you would later come to know as Welt, thanked.
As you turned away, Dan Feng’s reincarnation noticed a jade ring on your finger, recognizing it as the one he had woken up in.
“That’s…”
You hummed, raising your hand. You’ve never taken it off, not even when Dan Feng was reborn.
“You recognize it,” you mused. “I suppose that means he still has it?”
The reincarnation hesitated, but nodded. You smiled.
“That’s good. Say, what’s your name, little one?”
“Dan Heng,” he answered.
 “It’s a good name.” You stepped away for a moment to the kitchen. “I apologize; the tea may take a while. I wasn’t expecting guests.”
“It’s no matter,” Jing Yuan assured.
And as you served tea to the Astral Express, you couldn’t help but notice: five people, seated around a table, enjoying tea. Just like a scene hundreds of years ago.
You chuckle to yourself, a carved lotus glimmering in the light on your ring.
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reblogs w comments are appreciated !!
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bisexuallsokka · 1 year
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ok hello i have found that i have no choice but to introduce you to my "divorced zukka but slightly to the left" headcanon for a modern au. basically, a pre-transitioned zuko and sokka have a one night stand at the end of their senior year of high school, and never speak again. roughly six years later, sokka is starting his job at an elementary school (not a classroom teacher, like technology or something) and meets izumi, who is so sweet and cute and i swear thats the face katara makes when she's annoyed, and one day happens to see her dad pick up and huh he looks and AWFUL lot like that person i went to high school with and OH GOD some quick math brings an idea to mind.
So sokka attempts to confront zuko who is very much NOPE DO NOT TALK TO ME, but finally breaks down after a series of shenanigans that def do not involve mild stalking. but only to admit that yes, izumi is sokka's biological daughter, and would like to leave their interactions at that, except sokka has NO interest in SIMPLY leaving it at that because!!! he has a kid!!! that he knew nothing about!!! for six years!!!
zuko very much would like to continue living his life without sokka bc being a single young parent is hard enough but he has a good routine and good relationship with his daughter and he doesnt need this, this, SPERM DONOR to just come in here and mess everything up! the guy hasnt been there the last six years, there is absolutely no reason for his to get involved now!! BUT sokka absolutely would have been there if zuko had only TOLD HIM, but how was ZUKO supposed to know that, and did zuko really think so little of him?? except it was a one night stand and zuko didnt even realize he was a boy until right after and he originally wasnt even planning to keep izumi, and HOW could he have just given up their CHILD without ever even telling sokka about her and given him a CHANCE to take her, and WE WERE JUST KIDS AND HE WAS SCARED-
its complicated. and involves a lot of trying not to shout around izumi, who is just over the moon that her dad and her favorite teacher know each other outside of school. and there's a lot of heartache over sokka having to come to terms with the fact that yeah, hes not izumis parent, and there's only so much he can do without stepping on zuko's toes, and he only wants what is best for izumi, and zuko seeing that maybe sokka really does want to be all in for izumi even if zuko thinks sokka really doesnt fully understand what that means, and would it be such a bad thing? not that either of them are going to admit this to the other.
so it starts with small things, like sokka being allowed to pay child support (which hes been begging to do since day one), and maybe it turns out that zukos new coworker is sokkas friend and they end up at the same party where they can really see each other interact with izumi, and a chunk zuko's summer child care plans for the summer fall apart so sokka offers to babysit since his summer job is remote which feels BIG but also reallyyyyy too convenient to reject,
and then something bigger happens where izumi gets hurt at school and while sokka is blaming himself he's also panicking bc the hospital wont let him stay with her bc hes not an emergency contact so he steels himself and later tells zuko he wants to make his relationship to izumi legal. hes not going to have a custody fight, he would never ask for that, but he wants his name on her birth certificate and wants his name on her list of emergency contacts, and its the first time zuko understand that sokka 100% knows what he's getting into here and is willing to be in this 100%.
So maybe sokka moves into this "uncle sokka" role, because zuko still refuses to tell izumi that sokka is her other dad, and yeah that hurts, but sokka would rather have part of izumi's life if he can't have all of it. and sokka gets a better look inside their lives and discovers that its HARD being a young single parent, why would zuko have risked everything he worked for to mix in some guy he barely knew who might decide that zuko wasn't good enough and take izumi away? and zuko sees the pain sokka has from missing out on so many key moments of izumi's young life, and the more sokka is proving himself as a second parent, the more guilty zuko feels. they go through some shit together and its more and more evident that sokka doesnt just want to be that fun uncle, but he's ready more than willing to be a PARENT even when it means being the bad guy.
and maybe they start falling for each other a little, because they are starting to have this LIFE together and its not just about izumi anymore its the way zuko rolls his eyes and gets the new fancy ice pack out of the freezer when a limping sokka brings izumi back from the park, and its the way sokka makes zuko genuinely laugh after a long day at work, and its like their lives are getting fully intertwined-
except that they arent. and they couldn't. because if sokka decides its too much. because if zukos good favor runs out. if it didnt work out between them. they couldnt do that to izumi. what they have is good, its fine, (even if its not enough) they dont want to risk anything that could disrupt izumi's life. shes the priority. and sure, she's already asking questions about the two of them, but what if they don't work right in a real relationship? the way things are now, either of them could back out, and everyone would eventually be ok. maybe. except every time they think about the possibility, it seems like they are already too intertwined, and either of them trying to untangle would just be a disaster, so imagine if they HAD to untangle, and-
so they just end up in an awkward stage of sad pining. because theres no way it would actually work out. because it would hurt all of them. and their life has never been better, but it's never hurt this much either.
ok so i didnt realize i could still write this long in an ask, but essentially i am not a masochist like you, and they do figure it out in the end. this could happen a number of ways, such as izumi just announcing that yeah this is my dad and his boyfriend, or zukka doing the "pining make outs that we never talk about until one of us snaps and we decide to let ourselves be fucking happy", or a very funny "we both snap and bone for one wonderful night to get it out of our system and then we dont talk about it" which leads to an accidental second baby where sokka and zuko both laugh and say whelp it must be fate lets do this the right way this time.
the most important thing is that they both forget to tell izumi that sokka is her biological father, so teenage izumi is very shocked and upset that shes just had to learn this from something totally mundane like applying for a passport, and sokka and zuko do the spider man finger pointing of "i thought you told her" "no, you were supposed to tell her" "did we really not tell her?" and its absolutely disgusting how cute they are
thanks for coming to my tedtalk
i love every single thing about this! sokka wanting to be a part of izumi's life and help zuko out....zuko being reluctant to accept but eventually seeing how sokka is proving himself.....the limbo period where they are both afraid it could end any moment....TOO GOOD! i love every single option for how they could get together for real like this is my favorite take on modern au divorced zukka by far!!!! <3 <3
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mulderscully · 2 months
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i feel like oversharing today.
it's an odd feeling to be moving out at 30. i'm doing what i "should" have done over ten years ago and i keep going over and over how i ended up here.
there is the basic element of the pandemic & the housing crisis but for me, i cannot help but feel like my family failed me and i don't feel like me saying that is pity seeking or asking for sympathy. it's just true and i deserve to say that.
when i was 16 my mom died, she had been terminally ill for THREE years. my aunt and uncle knew she was going to die, they knew they would take me in. they promised her to take care of me.
the summer after my mom's death was one of the worst years of my life, but the summer after my senior year was even worse because that is when the situation genuinely became abusive and i just couldn't see what it was.
until i graduated high school at 19 (yes, i was always a little old in school for some reason) i was allowed to keep my mom's social security benefits, so i would recieve about $200 a month for my needs. at the time $90 of that would go to a storage unit that held all of me and mom's stuff from our old apartment. it got to the point that i couldn't keep paying it so me and my family decided to empty it out.
it gets messy here because my aunt is a hoarder, and i did not understand the gravity of that til that day. she didnt want to donate anything. at all, we physically had no space for the stuff so we went against her, this ended up in her throwing herself at me in the car and kicking me onto the street, grabbing me so hard she ripped my bra and i had to wait for my uncle to come and get me.
i did not understand this was abuse.
that night she jumped at me and choked me until my uncle pulled her off me.
i did not understand this was abuse.
because we threw "her" stuff away that entire summer she was a constant ball of fury that i have never seen. i would sleep and wake up her banging on my door, screaming to let her in.
i would feel dread when i was walking home cause i knew she would be yelling and throwing things because i "betrayed" her.
i did not understand that this was abuse. i JUST let myself start calling it that.
somehow as time went on this stopped happening as often. a lot of other things happened, my aunt also assaulted my uncle and my cousin and was arrested multiple times. but i just... got used to it? because i did, and DO love my aunt and felt like... i owed her bc she took me in.
so when this calmed down, and would only happen every few months, i stayed because i was so depressed. i would sleep until 3 pm every day. i worked nights around that habit. my bedtime was 4 am. i didn't ever wanna be awake when everyone else was. i did not understand how fucked up i was. no one asked me if i needed help,
it wasn't until right before the pandemic when i was 25 that i was like... finally waking up. the pandemic was hard because i had to be in the house all the time and the hoarding got worse bc all of us are too defeated to help now. the house is swallowing me. i come home and feel like i want to go anywhere else. i have a constant stomach ache that i fear is cancer but logically is probably just stress.
i cannot live like this anymore and i will not anymore. i never thought i would actually say i'm moving out and mean it but it's happening. i had to crawl my way out of the grief of my mother's death for thirteen years because my aunt considered her own more important, because she abused me.
i don't know how to even explain my life to people without them looking horrified, but i'm excited for that to change.
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justabigassnerd · 2 years
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Lifeline
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Pairing - Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw x sister!reader
Word count - 4,537
Warnings - mentions of death, injuries, hospitals, angst, fluff
Song - Lifeline by Joshua Bassett
Summary - One of the only people Rooster has left gets in an accident resulting in a very panicked Bradley
A/N - So whaddup it's another Rooster fic (I am NOT sorry). I listened to Lifeline by Joshua Bassett on the way home from work one night and it inspired this fic. I lowkey hope this didn't turn out bad bc it took me so damn long to write aha. Anyways I'll stop rambling. As per y'all, please send in requests, feedback and enjoy!!
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You and your brother only had each other. You were adopted into the Bradshaw family long after Goose died and just around Bradley’s seventeenth birthday. Carole had always wanted two kids, a boy, and a girl but after Goose died, she thought her plans were gone with the wind but a family friend of hers told her about a gorgeous baby girl in the adoption agency she worked for that needed a home. Carole spoke to Bradley about it, valuing her son’s opinion and when they both went to visit you, they both fell head over heels in love with you and adopted you as quick as they possibly could.
Just as Bradley was nearing the end of college and looked at reapplying for the Navy, hoping Maverick wouldn’t pull his papers again, Carole got sick. Everyone hoped she’d shake it but as time pressed on and she got sicker everyone started to accept the harsh realities of what was happening. Some people suggested that they take you in since you were still little, and they didn’t want Bradley to put his career on hold to raise his sister but he only let some family friends take you in for a year so he could pass his training and get settled into his job before requesting he stay in California to bring you up without having to move you around all the time. After all the loss the Bradshaw family had endured, you and Bradley learnt to lean on each other. After all, it was you and him against the world.
Now you were eighteen and in the midst of your senior year of high school. Bradley was now an instructor at Top Gun and the two of you were still as close as ever. You had never been afraid to tell your brother about things that upset or bothered you and Bradley always listened, making you feel heard and did his best to help you.
“I’m off to work. Don’t be late to school, drive safe.” Rooster says as he gathers his bag and slings it over his shoulder.
“I’m always safe. What time are you home tonight?” You call from the kitchen, occupied with making your breakfast.
“Depends on when Cyclone and Mav say I can leave. I’m teaching pretty much all of today, so I’d gamble I’ll be back around dinner time.” He replies, grabbing his keys and opening the front door.
“Okay, bye!” You say, poking your head around the door so you could say goodbye to your brother properly.
“Bye y/n/n, I’ll see you later.” He says with a smile before finally leaving through the door and allowing you to finish getting ready for school. When you’ve eaten your breakfast and made sure you have all the stuff you need for school in your bag you grab your keys and leave the house, getting into your car and starting the drive to school.
Once you arrive at school you are greeted by your friends who are all immediately stressing about the college applications you had sent off just the week prior, all anxious about what places will accept them or reject them. You try to mediate the fear by keeping your friends calm telling them to just worry about right now rather than worrying about something that’s out of control. After successfully calming your friends down, you figure it’s time to head into the school building and head to your homeroom to get the school day started.
The day was long and while you were ready to head home and collapse into your bed for a nap until you could make dinner, your friend Abi invited you and the rest of your friends around to hers to hang out for a bit. Given that the group of you hadn’t been able to hang out together for a while you all accepted, going to your car so you could give everyone a lift due to the fact you were the only one with a car out of all your friends. The drive, while not long, was filled with you all scream singing songs that the radio played until you reached Abi’s house. The four of you unload and head into the house, immediately heading for the living room where you settle on the sofa and find your favourite show to watch together and press play while Abi grabs some snacks. The four of you lounge around, enjoying each other’s company and exchanging silly comments and remarks about what the characters are doing on screen. When you next check the time, you sit up straighter, pushing the blanket back and standing up.
“Sorry guys, I should probably think about heading home. I’ll see you all tomorrow.” You say, laughing as your friends groan and toss pillows at you for leaving so soon but you simply wave goodbye and head out the door, climbing into your car and beginning the drive home. As you listen to the radio quietly playing under the rumble of the engine, you started to admire the views. You were lucky you grew up in a beautiful place, so you took any opportunities to admire your surroundings. As you reached a set of traffic lights, you celebrated quietly when the light turned green upon your approach but as you went across the gridlock, a car sped from the left side of your car, driving straight into the side of your car, making your world go dark and silent within seconds.
Rooster was finishing up the lecture he was giving to a new batch of Top Gun students when his phone buzzed. He quickly pulled it out of his pocket to see who was calling and when he didn’t recognise the number, he shoved his phone back in his pocket and continued to address the pilots. Just as he was beginning to dismiss the pilots the door to the hall burst open, revealing Maverick and Cyclone on the other side. All the trainee’s stood to attention as their superiors walked towards Rooster.
“You’re all dismissed.” Cyclone says to the recruits, his voice projecting clearly and sternly to the recruits who obey without a second thought, leaving the room as Maverick and Cyclone turn to face Rooster.
“Rooster. The hospital just called me. They said y/n got in an accident.” Maverick says and in a matter of seconds, Rooster’s world came crumbling down around him. He released a shuddering breath and barged past the two men, rushing through the base to get to his car. His thoughts were running a million and one miles an hour. That phone call must’ve been the hospital calling him. He scolded himself silently. He was so stupid why didn’t he pick up the phone? He was grateful that you had both him and Maverick down as emergency contacts otherwise he probably wouldn’t have known until god knows when. He curses angrily at the traffic jam he approaches, hand slamming on the wheel in frustration as he blinks back the tears building. He still didn’t know what had happened to you other than hearing you were in an accident, so his thoughts were going crazy. What if he got there and you were already gone? He couldn’t lose another family member. You were all he had left. When the traffic begins to move smoothly again, he gets to the hospital in what he dubs as record time, parking his car and entering the hospital in a rush. He practically runs up to the front desk.
“I’m here to see y/n Bradshaw. I got told she was brought in not too long ago.” Rooster says, almost leaning entirely over the desk to address the receptionist who looks up at him for a second before turning her attention back to her computer.
“Are you family?” She asks, typing on her computer before glancing up at him expectantly.
“Yes, I’m her brother.” Rooster replies hurriedly, fighting to keep the frustration from his tone but failing miserably. The receptionist types again on her computer before looking back up at him.
“You can go and wait in the waiting room. She’s being treated right now but I’ll inform someone, and they’ll come and get you when they’re done.” The receptionist says finally after typing one last thing into her computer. She gestured in the loose direction of the waiting room, and he followed her gesture to the room filled with people waiting to be seen by doctors or family members waiting to hear about their loved ones. Rooster sat down in one of the corners of the room, avoiding looking at anyone as he pulled his phone out of his pocket, seeing a bombardment of texts from everyone from Dagger Squad. Everyone was concerned about why he was seen storming out of work. Instead of replying to each individual text, he opened the group chat they had and sent what had happened and where he was. He hit send on the message and opened the text he got from Maverick asking if he was at the hospital and if he had any updates yet.
‘I’m at the hospital but they said she’s being treated. I can’t see her until she’s out. I’m scared, Mav.’
Rooster hit send on the message and leant back against the wall, staring up at the ceiling to try and will his tears to not escape from his eyes. He takes some slow deep breaths to try and remain calm, but his heart was hammering in fear. After a matter of minutes, his phone started buzzing intensely. He retracted the phone from his pocket and saw all his friends sending messages in response to his and then he noticed another message come through from Maverick.
‘I’m on my way, kid.’
Rooster felt a small amount of comfort from that one message and glanced around the waiting room, expecting Maverick to just appear out of thin air. It took about twenty minutes until Maverick entered the waiting room, locating Rooster and crossing to him. Maverick sat next to Rooster and turned to face him.
“Bradley…” Maverick says gently, the use of Rooster's name as opposed to his callsign made the tears he’d been holding in fall down his cheeks. Maverick wasted no time pulling him into a tight hug, squeezing him close as he feels the tears landing on his shoulder. Rooster’s whole body shook with sobs as he cried, clinging to Maverick like he was a terrified little boy again.
“What if I lose her, Mav? I can’t lose anyone else.” Rooster forces out through his cries, blinking the remainder of his tears away and pulling away from Maverick’s embrace and wiping his eyes furiously, looking away in embarrassment.
“That sister of yours is tough. We have to have faith that she’ll pull through.” Maverick says calmly although he too was worried about the severity of this accident. After Rooster takes some deep breaths to compose himself, he nods at Maverick’s words knowing that as much as he hated it, everything was out of his control, and he had to just have faith that everything would be okay. The two talk about anything and everything to try and keep their minds off how slowly time is passing when suddenly they hear a group of people coming and they were shocked to see Dagger Squad coming in, walking over to the two and ignoring the glares from everyone else in the waiting room. There weren’t enough seats for all of them to sit with Rooster and Maverick, so Hangman, Coyote and Phoenix decided to remain standing with their friends rather than finding somewhere else to sit.
“Have you gotten any updates?” Payback asks, looking over at Rooster as he shakes his head solemnly, glancing down at the floor.
“She’ll be alright, Bradshaw. That kid is a fighter. She’ll be back on her feet, kicking our asses in pool in no time.” Hangman says, his tone a lot gentler than anyone was used to hearing coming from him, but it was no secret that he held a soft spot for the youngest Bradshaw. Pretty much all of Dagger Squad had adopted you as their younger sister and they cared deeply for you so you being in hospital had all of them worried for you.
“Family of y/n Bradshaw?” The voice of a nurse has Rooster, Maverick and those of Dagger Squad who were sat down shooting out of their seats.
“I think just Rooster and Mav should go. They’ll fill us in.” Phoenix says, gesturing for everyone to sit down. Rooster and Maverick cross to the nurse, greeting him when they reach him. The nurse leads the two outside and to where a doctor was waiting. The doctor greets the two before bringing them into an office to have some privacy.
“They are just finishing treating y/n. She had some severe injuries when she came in. The car hit her side of the car, so we had to remove some glass and set some broken bones. She did suffer some head trauma so until she wakes up, we won’t know just how severe it is. We’ve moved her into a room, would you like me to take you up to her?” The doctor explains, reading through the charts on her clipboard before looking up at the two. Rooster nods while Maverick glances at Rooster.
“You go. I’ll let the others know what’s going on. Text me the room number when you’re there.” He says quietly, before turning and heading out of the office and into the waiting room to talk to Dagger Squad. Rooster follows the doctor to a lift and then follows her to your room where upon entry, more tears spring to his eyes at your state. Your left arm and leg were in a cast, and you had cuts and bruises littering your face and arms. Rooster pulled a chair up alongside your bed and took your right hand in his own, being mindful of the cannula in your hand. He was vaguely aware of the doctor letting herself out, but he didn’t remove his focus from you. He managed to force himself to take his eyes off you for but a moment so he could send Maverick your room number but the second his phone was off; his focus was back on you. He watched the steady rise and fall of your chest and listened to the repeated beeping from the heart monitor.
“I need you to pull through this, y/n/n.” He whispers to you, squeezing your hand for emphasis and despite the fact he knew you weren’t going to respond, it still crushed him.
As Maverick walked the hallway towards your hospital room, he kept praying in his head that you were going to make it. Maverick wasn’t a religious man, not by any means but if there was an afterlife or whatever people wanted to call it, Maverick had only two people in his mind he was praying to watch over you instead of any heavenly figure.
“Goose… Carole… you need to make sure y/n makes it. We can’t lose her too.” He mumbles to himself as he glances at the door numbers, still trying to find your room. When he locates your room, he enters and is greeted by the sight of Rooster sitting alongside your bed.
“The doctor caught all of us trying to come up to the room and said only two visitors at a time. We’ll take turns coming up here.” Maverick says gently, trying to bring some kind of comfort to Rooster. When Rooster doesn’t respond, Maverick pulls the other chair up alongside Rooster’s to be the support he needed right now.
Over the next day, Maverick and the rest of Dagger Squad would take it in turns being in the hospital room, not only to check on you but to make sure Rooster was okay. Everyone made sure to bring something to your hospital room, either something for you or something for your brother who hadn’t left your side. Hangman brought a bunch of flowers and left them on your bedside table. Bob brought a ‘get well soon’ card he got all of Dagger Squad to sign. Fanboy brought a teddy bear that sat alongside your flowers. Payback made sure to bring water for Rooster to drink while Phoenix would bring a meal from the hospital cafeteria up to him. She had attempted to bring in food from outside, but she got caught so had to resort to the hospital food. Maverick was always there for Rooster to talk to about whatever was worrying him. And every time Maverick approached the hospital room, he whispered a prayer up to Goose and Carole, asking them to watch over you.
On that evening you woke up, it was just you and Rooster in the room. You heard the beeping of the machines and gentle snoring before you opened your eyes, wincing at the brightness of the lights and the pounding in your head. You glanced to your side and saw your brother dozing lightly, his arms folded and his chin resting on his chest. You didn’t want to disturb him. He looked exhausted so you attempted to sit up slightly but exhaled sharply at the sudden pain, causing Rooster’s eyes to fly open.
“y/n?” He questions, trying to figure out if he’s dreaming or if this is real.
“Hey, B.” You say, smiling tiredly.
“How are you feeling?” He asks, knowing it’s a stupid question but he needed to know.
“Rough. My head hurts. The light is too bright.” You grumble, squinting when you make the mistake of glancing towards the light. Without hesitation, Rooster gets up and turns the light off, plunging the room into almost complete darkness with the only light filtering in through your window being the setting sun. Just as Rooster sits down by your side, a nurse walks in.
“It’s nice to see you awake, y/n. I’m just going to check you over and see how you’re doing if that’s okay with you.” The nurse says as you nod slowly, not enjoying the pain the motion gave you.
“Is your head giving you pain?” She asks, glancing down to make a note.
“Yeah, the light hurts my eyes, and my head is just pounding.” You admit, knowing nothing good will come from lying.
“Okay, we’ll try putting you on some different pain meds. When you were being treated, your doctors didn’t find anything of concern with your head injury, but we’ll be monitoring you just to be safe. Do you have any pain anywhere else?” The nurse asks, looking back up at you.
“Only if I move.” You say, hating the way you’re forced to just lie on your back.
“Well, I can only suggest staying still.” The nurse teases lightly, bringing a small smile to your face.
“Is there any way I could sit up slightly? I hate lying on my back like this.” You ask the nurse, your eyes pleading.
“We can try and adjust your bed but if there’s any discomfort, I expect you to tell us immediately.” She says, moving to pick up the remote for your bed and easing the side your head was at up. You hold a hand up to stop her when you’re sat up enough to satisfy you. You were relieved that no pain flooded through you at the motion, and you settled further into the pillow.
“I’m just going to grab those meds for you, okay?” The nurse confirms and when she leaves, you turn your attention back to your brother.
“How are you doing, B? You look rough. And that’s saying something.” You laugh lightly, stopping when he doesn’t even crack a smile at your joke.
“Not the time for jokes, y/n. I was scared shitless.” He says, sighing slightly as he shakes his head, still reeling from the whole ordeal.
“It’s not like I got in this accident just to scare you, Bradley. I don’t want to be here any more than you do.” You say, Rooster remained silent. He was always like this when he was emotional. He would choose to remain silent and stoic so no one could see that things were getting to him. He would bottle it up until he reached a breaking point and you always tried to get him to talk to you about it so he wouldn’t explode.
“Bradley?” You ask, hoping to get some sort of response from your brother. As you open your mouth to press him again, the door swings open and the nurse enters again with some meds in her arms.
“Alright, I have something that should help with those headaches of yours. I’ll just hook it up for you.” The nurse says cheerfully, oblivious to the slight awkwardness between you and Rooster.
“Thank you.” You say as she finishes hooking everything up.
“You’re welcome. You should get some rest. You should think about leaving, sir.” The nurse says, addressing you and then turning to Rooster.
“No. I’m staying. If that’s okay.” He says quickly, the nurse looked slightly taken aback by Rooster’s outburst but ultimately nodded.
“Okay, you can stay. Would you like me to set up a bed for you?” She replies but Rooster just shakes his head thanking the nurse but informing her he’ll be fine where he is.
“Well just come and get me if you change your mind. I’ll leave you two be now.” She says with a smile before leaving. When she’s gone you turn your head to look at your brother.
“I agree with the nurse. You should get some rest.” Rooster says as you nod slightly, feeling minor tiredness creeping up on you and you could only guess it was because of the meds.
“Only if you get some rest too. Something’s telling me you’ve slept a grand total of ten minutes since you got here.” You say and you could tell from his expression that you hit the nail right on the head.
“I’ll be fine, kid.” He says dismissively once he collects himself.
“But you won’t be if you don’t rest. You need to rest. So why won’t you?” You ask, the worry and confusion on your face making Rooster’s expression soften, he didn’t want to upset you.
“I’m just scared.” He admits, lowing his head in embarrassment and fixing his eyes on his lap.
“Scared of what?” You press gently, sitting up slightly, ignoring the small spark of pain that shoots through you.
“I’m scared that if I close my eyes, something might happen to you.” He manages to say, blinking the tears away and still not daring to look up at you.
“Look at me, B.” Your gentle voice encourages, wanting to do nothing more than to comfort your brother. He’d always been there for you growing up, so you wanted to return the favour.
“I’m not saying goodbye this soon. I’m going to be fine tonight. I got my big brother by my side and that’s all I need. I’ll be okay.” You say, a soft smile on your face as you grab his hand. Your smile widened when your brother finally looked up and made eye contact with you.
“I’ll be fine.” You repeat, squeezing his hand lightly as he nods carefully.
“Promise you’ll wake me up if anything happens.” He asks, and you hum in acknowledgement.
“If I wake up with even the slightest amount of pain, I’ll let you know. Promise.” You say, watching as a small smile finally graces your brother's face.
“Thank you. Now, get some rest y/n/n.” He says as you yawn and settle back on the pillows.
“You better get some rest too otherwise I’ll kick your ass.” You mumble, letting your eyes close as Rooster lets out a soft laugh.
“I promise I’ll get some rest. I love you, y/n/n.” He replies, smiling as you snuggle into the pillow.
“I love you too, B.” You mutter before allowing sleep to beckon you. Your breaths becoming slow and deep within seconds. Rooster watches you for a minute before folding his arms and resting his chin against his chest once more and allowing his tired eyes to close, welcoming sleep as it comes.
Rooster was awoken the next morning by all his friends entering and when he looked over at them confused, they were quick to explain.
“The nurse let us all come up. We must’ve bugged them so much yesterday that they just gave in this morning.” Fanboy explains, a shit-eating grin on his face that the naval aviators were able to get what they wanted.
“How’s she doing?” Phoenix asks, looking from where you were laid asleep peacefully to where Rooster was sat, handing him a granola bar to eat.
“She woke up last night. She’s doing okay.” Rooster says with a smile, feeling well rested and more optimistic. The news made everyone start chattering excitedly despite Maverick, Rooster, and Bob’s attempts to keep them quiet.
“Guys, come on she’s still asleep.” Bob pleads, feeling bad that the entire group has burst in and started making a racket.
“I was asleep until Fanboy started talking. His inside voice is any normal person’s outside voice.” Your tired voice has every head snapping to look at you as you peel your eyes open and smile.
“How are you feeling, sweetheart?” Maverick asks, approaching your bedside and brushing a loose piece of hair away from your face.
“Feeling good, Mav.” You say, grinning up at your godfather as he smiles back, pressing a kiss to your forehead before moving away to allow the others to say hi.
“You’re one tough kid aren’t you, Bradshaw?” Hangman teases, ruffling your hair as you laugh, swatting at his hand.
“Sorry, Jake. You’re not getting rid of me that easily.” You fire back as he shakes his head, chuckling before the others push him aside to talk to you. You spent time talking to all the members of Dagger Squad as Maverick and Rooster watched on with a fond smile as you asked the team to sign either the cast on your arm or leg. Both Rooster and Maverick were overjoyed that you were doing better, and they could hope that you’d be able to come home soon and that you’d be back to doing the things you love.
Bradley Bradshaw had already lost so much in his life so the time you were unconscious in the hospital bed were the most painful hours of his life. Wondering if he was about to add his little sister to the list of people he’s lost in his lifetime. He’d never been so relieved to see you awake in his life when you finally did. He vowed from that moment on that he was never going to take any moments with any of his loved ones for granted. He wanted to appreciate every moment he had with those he cared for in case something like this happened again. But for now, instead of dwelling on what could have been, he found himself smiling at the fact you’d be around to be his pain in the ass baby sister a bit longer.
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strwberri-milk · 11 months
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Hi hi hello! Can i request mordern high school love with thoma? Reader being a gentle and reserved person being more popular among the juniors and thoma popular for his charm and being on the basketball team. Theyre relationship isnt too open but its not a secret either. They try to keep it low key of course
Now imagine the small moments with him :( after school studying at the library, walking home together, recess on the rooftop, arcade dates on the weekend and him winning you a plushie that we know sleep with evry night :(( him asking you to prom and being a gentleman :(( him coming over after school to study but end up staying over cause of the thunderstorm outside :(( our parents love him hes so sweet
(Pls help im so delulu for him)
ngl i love. modern high school aus theres smth about the simplicity of high school and being in the in between where you're *almost* an adult but still treated like a child and knowing youre about to ?? crest smth that everyone talks about anyway idk i really romanticised my high school life and ngl all my friends are from higschool LMAOO also the whole freshman/junior/sophmore/senior thing makes no sense to me idek if i put this in the right order and i wish prom was more of a thing here bc yall make it seem so fun
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Thoma is definitely that kid that people know of, but don't really know all too well. He's really nice and all the teachers and students like him, and of course being both attractive and athletic made him that much easier to admire.
You had a crush on him for what feels like forever, wishing that one day he'd notice you out of all the other people who liked him too. He had so many admirers due to how kind he was, but being his friend you knew that there was so much to him.
When he finally asked you out it was the most cliche, yet sweetest way he could have ever done it. He drove you to a place that the two of you often frequented. When you got out, you turned around to see a picnic he prepared for the two of you, thinking it was just another nice thing he was doing for you because you were a little stressed out recently but the flowers and shy look on his face told you otherwise.
The two of you didn't go out of your way to tell everyone you were dating. Thoma just wasn't as willing to let people touch him as much, and you were seen hanging around the basketball team a little more often than before. Thoma always walked you to class anyway if he could, so people couldn't really tell the difference until one day they saw him give you a hug.
By that point everyone found out pretty quick but the two of you didn't feel the need to justify anything to anybody so you'd just confirm that you were dating and that was it.
Thoma always loves taking you on various dates whenever you can. He would see what kinds of places pop up on his feed and scout them out before taking you out for a night on the town (until curfew of course).
Your parents were really trying to look for something to be wrong with him, not wanting him to distract you from your life or end up in an unsatisfactory position of your heart being broken or anything like that. However, the fact that he constantly brought you home on time and made sure to say greet your parents every time as well as bring them treats he baked himself made it hard for him to stay hated in their eyes.
He's constantly gifting you things that remind him of you. If he's at the grocery store then he's giving you a candy that you liked. If he's at the mall he found some accessory he thought you'd look good with. It doesn't matter when or where - you're always on his mind and the trinkets you've accumulated from him are proof of that.
Whenever there are any events locally he loves to take you to them. Whether it be some sort of festival or just a pop up his favourite thing to do is explore the grounds with you and spoil you with prizes or the food there. He's got no limits when it comes to you.
Exam season means crunch time. The two of you are forcibly holed up by each other to try and get studying done. He's a hard worker so he's got tons of study tips for you if you need it and the right amount of rewards too. Whenever you get a practise question right or finish a writing prompt within the time limit well he always congratulates you with a hug or a kiss.
I can see him being super into doubling too. The two of you are one of those people who are constantly on call just doing random shit together. Neither of you has to actually talk to the other person - you both just like being in each other's presence.
Your room and bed are both filled with tons of things that Thoma gives you and he can't help but grin to himself whenever he comes over and sees it. He's got photos commemorating everything on his phone, glad that you like the things he gives you as much as he likes you.
Thoma absolutely adores you and I can see the two of you being high school sweethearts. He comes to your events and you to his, and the two of you end up living a perfectly happy life together, glad that one day oh so many years ago the two of you were assigned lockers next to each other.
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altrie · 5 months
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my gjhm hcs/prompts/scenario/drabbles 5️⃣🎶💘
more personal hcs i have! also in continuation/addition to my utahime hcs post 👍 this is just a mix of gjhm, utahime and some sprinkle of utashoko, sugushoko hcs if you stare hard enough..
i stand by the idea that these two started out as hot and cold frenemies during their time as students. so not exactly fluffy/shippy material here but i digress, it's fun to speculate what gjhm were like as annoying students getting on everyone's nerves.. i think those two would have been adorable, funny, and annoying 😂
also, i wrote this in mind that gojo is the one that fell first and fell hard for utahime. so almost everything here is just a perspective of someone crushing on their senpai LMAO. in my head, utahime doesn't start noticing gojo until they're both in their twenties. i feel those two would be a slow burn like a very angsty slow burn 🫠🫠🫠
note: i had to research more of the tokyo tech school, calculate the years, ages to try and be accurate as possible to the canon timeline. this long list starts at around 2005/2006 pre-HI arc. if gege doesn't state something explicitly, i feel it's free real estate to interpret and develop headcanons 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️
young gojo and utahime formally met around late spring to early summer of 2005 and immediately had a rocky start. they met through shoko one afternoon after class. however, gojo has already known about utahime prior to this. while not paying attention to yaga's lecture. he noticed the senior singing to herself as she tended the campus community garden with the other upperclassmens/sorcerers. her soothing voice is what he notices first
gojo was awe struck by utahime at first glance and it's been bad for him since then. his senior who is 2-almost 3 years older, short, calm and too easy of a target to pick on is very much adorable when angy
bc of the nature of shoko and utahime's CT, they're often at the main campus ground together. they'll hang out in the infirmary or chilling somewhere nearby. post missions, the boys tend to visit the infirmary just to annoy them and get treatments/checkups even if they don't have a visible scratch
the gang made it a tradition to have dinner every sunday, every week as possible. it started with utashoko going to a potluck/bbq restaurant frequently until the boys learned about it and crashed it >_>. since then, they have dinner at campus where they all cook together. everyone has to pitch in. utahime likes to incorporate in-season crops to the cooking. gojo doesn't usually eat veggies but somehow can have seconds of songstress's hotpot
when on missions, utahime keeps a journal and a camera to document memories. gojo makes fun of her for it, but ends up enjoying it and helping her with the camera work, finding spots to take pics. he sometimes helps take pics too bc of his tall stature
the tokyo tech high campus is LOUD when gjhm are bickering. and they're always bickering! it doesn't matter who started it (it's gojo always), so those two end up getting scolded by yaga often
on days when utahime is paired with another sorcerer for support, the campus is quiet and gojo is sad :(. when he gets sent to missions, he doesn't get the same support. he's aware he's a special grade and don't need it but it's so boring to do it alone!
when utahime comes back from missions, she always brings back treats and souvenirs for everyone. yes, that includes her annoying junior who in return starts doing the same thing at his missions. she ends up bringing him sweets, like tons of sweets she thinks he'll like (he does). gojo started doing the same gesture but he tends to lie that he didn't bring anything for utahime--which she'll say she doesn't care. but by the time she returns to her room, she'll find a gift bag and a note placed on her desk from the same junior who likes to be dramatic about everything
since utahime is the top student at their campus and aces every exam they have. it's become a thing for her to lead their study sessions. she does her best to tutor and simplify things for them. gojo tends to be a distraction at first but tends to help her out on these sessions. they end up pass out next to each other with his uniform jacket placed on her as a blanket. the others often wake up early before those two and notes how peaceful they are
sugushoko definitely picks up on gojo's crush on utahime before gojo is even aware himself. they been quiet about it the whole time, just watching the disaster unfold. shoko brings up the idea of mentioning it to one of them at one point but geto wants to see how much longer until one of them realizes it or something funny happens
geto one day asks gojo who's his type. gojo's answer makes it so obvious he's describing utahime but he doesn't even know. geto teases him that he just described their senior. gojo just gives him an annoyed look and changes the subject
shoko just drops the information about gojo's crush to utahime out of the blue and utahime just gives her a disgusted look. "gojo just likes to be a brat." utahime goes into a long tangent about gojo. shoko notes the songstress definitely does not look at gojo like that except as an annoying junior and laughs to herself about it. poor gojo 🤭
utahime gets asked out a lot by upperclassmen and non-sorcerers. it definitely doesn't bother gojo! nope, not at all! but he makes it a goal to disturb whoever he sees talking to his senior when utahime should be studying or tutoring. their courtship is distracting the flow of education! utahime ends up apologizing for her junior's bratty actions
december 2005: gojo turns 16 and the new years are near. the trio decides to celebrate over break. everyone except utahime are present during this month. due to the songstress graduating in a few months, she's been occupied in missions back to back. it doesn't bother gojo that she's not present during his bday or the gang's winter break or for new years celebration. but he is annoyed he doesn't even get a simple text or email from her! what kind of senior is she not to acknowledge her junior's bday or greet a simple new years? he definitely does not miss her or wait for her message on his phone 💢🙄
what he doesn't expect is to find himself walking to campus in the crisp january weather after new years. he sees utahime sitting on one the benches. she stands up after noticing him and waves at him. gojo quickens his steps towards her, already planned out what snarky comment to say. what he doesn't expect is for her to suddenly reach out a big giftbag to him. gojo pauses and looks at her. "happy belated birthday and a happy new year, gojo"
utahime's gifts to him were handful of sweets, varying from different prefectures. there are mochi, chocolate, pastries, etc. one that stood out to him was a stuffed white cat keychain wearing some dark glasses. she states she saw it and thought it resembled him. she got matching ones for sugushoko as well and can't wait to give it give to them. gojo doesn't have a joke or anything in return to say and thanked her for the gifts. he doesn't end up using the keychain but places it in his desk inside his campus room. displaying it neatly next to his lamp and a picture of their friend group
gjhm rarely fights. sure, they get into arguments, bickering contests, loud banter--but fights are very rare. when they do fight, it's usually something that started from stubbornness, pettiness, even miscommunication. but they're both willing to apologize soon right after the heat of the moment ends. they don't like giving each other the cold shoulder
since gjhm are pretty young and are still inexperienced, i think them apologizing won't be so direct. they're both equally stubborn when it comes to each other and stumble with getting their thoughts across but they'll make it up halfway towards other means (likes small gifts, tea, nonchalant convos about it, etc)
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elizabethsaige · 11 months
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more stobin head canons bc I love them and I miss them
- ice cream runs at night are a regular thing for them but sometimes steve wont get anything but still takes robin because he knows she wants some. she always gets mad when he doesn't get any because she only wants some if he gets some
- jonathan teaches Steve photography (because trauma bonded them together and now they decided to try and actually bond over similar interests idk) and every once in a while, they’ll go and take pictures outside together (robin of course goes with them) and steve ends up mostly taking pictures of robin and jonathan because he loves to capture people’s beauty and shit like that
- robin and argyle become really close after a night of smoking on steve’s roof and she tells him what happened when she and steve were drugged and although he remembers every detail she tells him, he keeps it to himself and pretends like it was just a made up story because robin said that no one else really knows what happened
- steve decides that he really wants to get a dog but robin is more of a cat person. they end up getting one of each. after looking at the local adoption center, steve adopts a golden retriever named buddy and robin gets senior orange cat named tuna
- they get fired from family video towards the beginning of summer. luckily they get jobs as camp counselors for the summer. steve is adored by all of the campers and robin just doesn’t really want to be there but they end up having the time of their lives. robin meets another camp counselor, amber, who also turns out to like girls and they really like each other. they have sex in the woods and it’s robin’s first time and she’s so nervous. she doesn’t speak to amber for the next few days after because she doesn’t really know where to go from there. meanwhile that same night steve hosted a huge talent show for all of the counselors and it went so well. he’s excited that his best friend finally slept with a girl she liked but really he’s just upset that she missed his talent show
- some more jobs they had together are waiter and line cook, servers at the drive-in, receptionists, and bartenders once they were both 21
- bartending lasted a lot longer than the others, a whole 2 years. one day robin was just fed up with working there and being treated poorly and the second she put in her resignation, steve signed his name at the bottom and quit too
- steve sometimes gets an attitude with robin because she likes to leave their apartment messy and it drives steve insane. he feels like a housewife that isn’t appreciated enough but robin doesn’t mean any harm, she really just has a hard time tidying after herself
- matching scoops tattoos duh but also steve gets robin’s converse tatted on his inner forearm and robin gets steve’s sunglasses above her knee
- family dinner nights become a regular thing. steve actually loves to cook but didn’t like to cook just for himself. he makes robin help with the simple things like peeling potatoes and mixing sauces. they invite everyone over, joyce and hopper too. dustin complains that it’s not chicken nuggets. max makes fun of steve for being a good cook. el begs steve to teach her how to cook. and steve loves every minute of it
- robin is absolutely insufferable when she's sick, she thinks she's dying every time. steve laughs at her for being dramatic but actually likes taking care of her when she’s sick because she’s forced to take things easy
- steve on the other hand refuses to acknowledge when he’s sick. robin will do everything in her power to prove that he needs to rest but he always says “sickness is for the weak, I am strong” 
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bigdumbbambieyes · 9 months
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I just wanted to send you a little idea for being such an amazing presence in this fandom
Ok so Billy and Steve who start writing to each other as penpals because Steve needs practice writing with his dyslexia and Billy “isn’t focused enough and is being a lazy little shit” they write to each other on and off through most of the late 70s and early 80s until late 1983 when Steve just stops. Billy can’t work out why initially until he moves to Hawkins the next year and sees King Steve at the party, kingdom not quite intact. And Billy knows it’ll be dangerous and there’ll be hell to pay if Neil finds out but seeing how heartbroken Steve looks at the party and then at school, Billy knows he has to help his penpal realise what love is again, whatever the cost
omg no you are the amazing presence in this fandom!! 🤍 all i do is write silly little stories 🥹 thank you for being such a positive space and person!!
and okay but what’s crazy is that this was going to be the fic i wrote for the harringrove bigbang KFNFKF we share the same brain!!
i’m so soft for pen pals au 🥹 especially childhood pen pals!! bc it’s so easy to think that maybe their schools signed up their classes for this program and that Steve and Billy were paired up 😭
like the chances are so slim yet they beat the odds and get each other!! and maybe it’s a rocky start, like Steve doesn’t really want to do it bc he’s insecure about his dyslexia but Billy really craves a friend and he’s interesting so Steve keeps writing back, and then the school year ends and the program stops but…they just keep going
and Steve’s parents are happy that their son has found this passion for writing bc it’s so hard to get him to read and write outside of school bc of his dyslexia so they pay for the postage for both his and Billy’s letters 🥹 i’m imagining steve slipping a little postage stamp into his letter so billy can write him back
and then ofc they meet in their senior year when Billy moves to Hawkins, and like you said, Billy shows Steve attention and care and omg one day he takes Steve to his room while Neil’s out and shows him the stacks of letters he’s kept over the years 😭
and Steve falls in love right then and there bc he also kept every single letter 🥹
UGHHHHH this is so good!! thank you for sending me this ask, lovely! i hope you have a great day!
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elcondorpasas · 2 years
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Hi! I saw your requests are open! Can I ask for an unrequited love with Eddie? Something like the reader being totally in love with him but Eddie is not that interested at the beginning only to have an happy ending. Also the reader being insecure and extra shy, convincing herself she doesn’t have any chances with him bc they’re so different and please not best friends to lovers tropes 😅 You can go as smutty as you want for the happy ending if you thinks it can works! (I love how you write smuts, happy to oblige is amazing)
LET ME GET WHAT I WANT | eddie munson x fem!reader
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summary: you'd spent so much of your life watching from the sidelines with no one close enough to vent your feelings to. and when you begin crushing on the cute metalhead in your class, you need to find an outlet. and so begins the journals of love letters to eddie 'the freak' munson that he'll never read....right?
warnings: 6k+ words. swearing, kissing without first consenting, angst, allusion to smut, fluff, pining, NOT PROOFREAD </3
a/n: whewwww this was a labor of love ngl - i hope this is okay. coming back from a writing dry spell is not the most ideal, but regardless i hope you all enjoy this. i listened to that damn smiths song 47 times in a row writing and rewriting that scene lol
cross listed on ao3 HERE
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It really all started as just a crush. 
And that’s all you had ever meant for it to be. A fleeting attraction. Something that would have been as easily forgotten as it was noticed. 
Junior year. You’d been approved to test out of your literature class that summer, leaving an empty period in your schedule. You’d almost had a moment to breathe, a second to relax, before your parents were pushing you to fill the empty space with another class, as if your life wasn’t already revolved around school. Every minute of your day was either filled with class, studying, or an extracurricular activity that was deemed appropriate by your parents. You were any Hawkin’s parents’s wildest dream. Straight As. Never partied a day in your life. No relationship drama. You did everything your parents asked of you, gave them your all….and yet, it never seemed to satisfy them completely. Despite your obedience, they were quick to point out all your shortcomings, no matter how big or small. 
It was almost an understatement to say you were insecure. You tucked yourself away into the furthest corner of every room you entered. You stayed to the shadows of Hawkins. No one ever really noticed you and at this point in your life, you were a bit thankful for it. If no one noticed you, how would they notice your failures? 
That wasn’t to say you never dreamed of what it’d be like to be in the spotlight. To be someone like Chrissy Cunningham. Popular. Beautiful. The kind of girl who talked to guys with ease. Or what it might like to be like Eddie Munson. Now, he was an enigma to you. The rest of Hawkins would and did call him a freak. An absolute idiot who had to repeat senior year for the second time. A delinquent. A slacker. And maybe they had him pegged somewhere in those assumptions. By the middle of junior year, your interactions with Eddie Munson hadn’t reached beyond third period senior literature with Mrs, Moseley, the class that filled your empty period. You figured taking senior lit would be easy enough and maybe next year you’d be able to persuade your parents to let you keep your empty period. 
Perhaps ‘interactions’ had been too generous of a word. Third period was mostly filled with observations of Eddie. As you had tucked yourself into the back of the classroom, wanting to avoid becoming the know-it-all prissy teacher’s pet, you had unknowingly placed yourself in the perfect position to gaze at Eddie, who sat diagonally a row in front of you to the right. All your observations during the first semester of junior year led you to a singular truth that you full heartedly believed. Eddie Munson was not an idiot. An idiot would not absentmindedly mumble the answers to Mrs. Moseley’s questions under his breath. An idiot would not write some of the most amazing and detailed adventure stories in his notebook. Stories about adventure, heroism, the underdog ending up on top. No, Eddie Munson was not an idiot. He was a dreamer. A dreamer stuck in middle of no where Hawkins. Destined for things far bigger than anything you could imagine. You wouldn’t- couldn’t fault him for his academic failures. And that, that one little realization, was the beginning of your silly, little crush taking root in your too-big-for-its-own-good heart.
Amidst your budding crush, you had begun to feel rather lonely in your personal life. Your crush had made you painfully aware of your lack of friends. You found yourself yearning for someone to talk to about these new and exciting feelings, but everyone you begrudgingly conversed with on a daily basis was either a teacher or an acquaintance. You surely couldn’t gush to your biology lab partner, Nancy Wheeler, about your sudden feelings for Eddie Munson. Absolutely not. 
So, you had to get creative.
You’d read once, in some psychology study you were doing a presentation on sophomore year, that some therapists have their patients write letters to help sort through feelings and process them. To whom? Well, that would be up to each patient and who may or may not be involved in their own respective situations. So, you had decided to begin writing letters of your own. 
At first, they were to a nameless friend. It helped a bit at first. You would write just to write. Pages full of dribble about your personal insecurities and how the pretty metalhead in your third period was far more interesting than Mrs. Moseley’s lectures on Lord of the Flies. But you found yourself needing to personalize the letters a bit more. One day, you found yourself writing ‘Dear Eddie’ instead of ‘Dear Friend’ and it made you stop, your heart beating rapidly. You were safe in the confines of your room, yet you felt like any second someone was going to walk in and laugh at you, call you out for it. It wasn’t just anxiety though that had your heart racing. The idea of writing a letter to Eddie Munson. Saying all the things you were too frightened to say to him in person. How cool you thought his hair was, what a dick Jason Carver was to him, how you tried to listen to Iron Maiden after seeing their name on a shirt he wore to class but you’d ended up with a headache instead. There was something very cathartic about writing everything you left unspoken and something very soothing about knowing it’d never get sent. 
After Eddie missed Mrs. Moseley’s midterm, you figured it was safe to assume you’d be seeing him next year, his third attempt at senior year. This put you at war with your thoughts. On the one hand, you were sad for Eddie. Not in a pitying way, but sad that he had hoped this would finally be his year. He spoke it about it sometimes and you brought it up in your fake letters. You’d seen him at lunch a few times giving dramatic speeches to his Hellfire friends about how he was getting out of this dump, and you had even began to believe it. But you couldn’t help the light feeling in your chest at the thought of getting to spend another year gazing at his tattoos and pretty eyelashes. It’s safe to say you were almost beside yourself with joy when you found out you had not one, not two, but three classes with him your senior year. 
Your sadness for Eddie went out the window the moment your fourth period history teacher, Mr. Wilcox assigned you to be Eddie’s tutor. Of course, this decision was made the second week into classes, throughout which Eddie had only made an appearance a total of 4 times. The whole thing earned a whopping 3 pages in your letters to Eddie notebook, which you had just began feeling safe enough to bring with you to school. However, you now being Eddie’s tutor meant you had to converse with the object of your affections. And since he hardly showed up for class, this meant you had to track him down during your free period that your parents agreed to let you keep an open period so long as you promised to take up an SAT prep class after school on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. Of course, you had agreed.
Eddie had three known whereabouts if he was skipping class. He was either in the drama room coming up with new ideas for Hellfire campaigns, in the woods behind the track and field most likely committing a felony, on in his van getting high. Well, the drama room was desolate, and it was storming when you had ventured out to find Eddie. The only place he could possibly be was his van. 
You pulled your raincoat around yourself tightly, your hood pulled up to shield the fat droplets of rain from drenching your hair. Lucky for you, Eddie’s van wasn’t too far from the covered walkway leading to the library where you hoped you could lead him to for a quick planning session to set up what days he wanted to meet, if he wanted to meet at all. You weren’t a pushy person, but you were also a people pleaser. Those two attributes were definitely going to duke it out if Eddie decided he didn’t care for tutoring, and you’d have to return to Mr. Wilcox empty handed.
Before you could acknowledge the extent of what you were doing and just who you were about to be face to face with, your knuckles were wrapping on the back door of Eddie’s van. You heard a commotion inside and the van rocked a bit just before the door of the van popped open. A cloud of smoke hit you in the face causing you to scrunch your nose up and have a small coughing fit.
“Aw, c’mon. It’s not that bad.”
Your coughs subsided and you peered up into Eddie’s dark eyes. You were caught completely off guard. His eyes were so deep, you felt like you could drown in them. And they were big too. Big doe eyes framed sweetly by his bangs and those eyelashes. How could anyone ever call him a freak. 
“Uhh, hello? I know you’re probably a lightweight, but I feel like it’d take more than a little secondhand smoke to get you high,” Eddie’s voice shook you from your trance and you finally took in the rest of his face. He had a lopsided grin and his head cocked to the side.
“M- Mr. Wilcox,” You sputtered.
“Uh,” Eddie began, “No. Eddie Munson. You’re Y/N, right?”
It felt like every nerve ending you had was on fire. Your brain was shouting at you to talk, to do anything! Your body wouldn’t not move. He knew your name. Eddie Munson knew your name. Before you could get too trapped in the how’s and why’s, you felt a tugging on your arm. You looked down to see Eddie pulling you towards the van. 
“Get in here, gonna catch a cold,” He tsked. You’d have never taken him for someone that’d be worried about your health. 
Oh…Well, this encounter was most definitely getting a whole notebook work of letter entries. 
“Mr. Wilcox sent me.” Your brain was catching up to the present.
“Oh he did, did he?” Eddie asked while lighting up a cigarette, which he held out and offered to you. You seemed to have shaken the nerves away momentarily as you were able to make a declining motion. 
“Yes, you weren’t in class yesterday. He asked me to tutor you,” you explained. The smoke was really doing a number on your lungs, but you tried to hold in your coughs. You felt you’d already made a fool of yourself, and you did not want to embarrass yourself further. 
“Ah, Mr. Wilcox does that every year. He won’t hold you to it though,” Eddie waved you off. It stung a little, to come to the obvious truth that Mr. Wilcox asking you was just an attempt to get Eddie to pass his class and not divine intervention pushing you two together.
You looked around for a moment and sighed, “But don’t you want to graduate this time?” 
It was Eddie’s turn to look up at you wide eyed. Before he could respond you were ushering out apologies for overstepping or being rude and whatever else that question could have been interpreted as. But instead of yelling or kicking you out of his van, Eddie just started laughing. 
“Y/N worried about little old me? Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson?” He laughed and you had decided then and there that you’d gladly pay money to hear that laugh for the rest of your life.
“How do you know my name?” You asked shyly. You could feel the heat growing in your face. Eddie looked at you like you’d sprouted a second head.
“We have like three classes together. You also did that killer book report on Lord of the Rings last year in Moseley’s class,” Eddie explained simply as if the sheer fact that he knew your name, let alone remembered you from last year, wasn’t making you breakout into a sweat. 
“Oh yeah,” you played it off, “well, to be honest, you were the reason I chose that book.” 
“Me?” He asked.
“Yeah. I- uh, you had a copy with you one day and it was so worn and tattered. I thought, ‘This book has to be amazing if he’s read it that many times.’” You explained.
“Or either, you get your books from the bottom of the bargain bin at Hudson’s secondhand shop,” You added as an afterthought and you both laughed. 
A strange, but comfortable silence fell over the two of you. You staring at Eddie. Eddie staring back at you, puffing away at his cigarette. 
“Well,” you began, “I guess I’ll leave you. Sorry to have bothered you about the whole tutoring thing, I wasn’t aware Mr. Wilcox did it every year.” 
“What are you doing after school?” Eddie asked suddenly as you moved to the door of his van. 
You were beyond thankful that your back was now facing him, and you could hide the absolute shock that was undoubtedly present on your face. You took a moment to process this question. It was Thursday, so you didn’t have SAT prep courses and your other activities had yet to begin picking up for the year.
You turned, “I’m free. Why d’you ask?”
“I’ve got some uh…business to take care of right after school but meet me in the library at 3:30.” He replied.
“The library?”
“Yeah, you know the place with all the books,” he smiled.
“No, yeah, of course I know what the library is. But, why?”
“Call it a change of heart. I think I’ll give the tutoring a try this year,” Eddie smiled. 
You felt like you could have died on the spot. His smile was breathtaking. 
“C-cool. Library it is,” You nodded and before he could say anything else, you were launching yourself from his van back into the rain and booking it towards your locker. Your journal was going to have a field day with this.
And that’s how most of the senior year went. You’d meet with Eddie on Thursdays, 3:30 sharp in the library. Thursdays were seen to most as a boring day. Something to be gotten through on the way to Friday and the weekend. To you, Thursdays were everything. You’d spend an hour and a half with the most interesting person you’d ever met. And somewhere in your heart, you thought they meant something to Eddie as well. He had even made more of an effort to show up to class, which Mr. Wilcox commended you for. You tried not to let that go to your head too much. And you didn’t think anything could ruin this for you. Until.
“Hey, d’you think I could grab the notes from last week? I can give them back to you tomorrow.” Eddie asked as he scribbled down a quick campaign idea he’d come up with while you two talked. 
Your tutoring session had come to a close for the day and you were already dreaming about the next week.
“Yeah sure,” you had already packed up but found yourself digging in your backpack for the composition book you used for your history notes. Your hand clasped around the spine of the notebook and you passed it to Eddie who shoved it into his back along with his own notebook. 
“You’re really in a rush today. Hot date?” You joked. 
He blushed.
“Well, I dunno if I’d call it a date, but y’know it’s not a regular business meeting.” He mused. 
“O-oh?” You squeaked and he continued, although you wished he hadn’t. Every word felt like your world was crashing down around you.
“Yeah, get this. I’m meeting up with Chrissy fucking Cunningham. Can you believe that shit?” He whispered to you as a pair of girls passed by your table.
You silently begging for him to stop talking. He rambled on some more about how Chrissy left him a note in his locker and how they were meeting in the woods behind the school and how her dickhead boyfriend had no idea. 
You weren’t delusional. You knew you had no right to be upset or jealous. Eddie wasn’t your boyfriend no matter how badly you wished for him to be or how much you wrote about it in your journal. He was just a boy and you found yourself questioning if he was even truly your friend. Even though that admission made you feel like all the air was being squeezed from your lungs. You, however, were a people pleaser and you did everything you could to make others happy, even at the expense of your own happiness. So, you smiled.
You smiled and saved face, “Oh, Eddie that’s so exciting. You’ll have to tell me all about it next week?” 
“Definitely. Hey, thanks again for the notes.” He said as he rushed past you.
Maybe Thursdays were the worst.
That evening you picked a part every interaction you’d had with Eddie. You thought there had been flirting and then you realized, woefully, that maybe that’s just how he was with other people. Mistaking his charisma and friendliness for romantic interest. God, you wanted to kick yourself you felt so stupid. Of course, he liked girls like Chrissy. There wasn’t a single thing you could think of about her that wasn’t perfect. Straight As, Beautiful. Outgoing. Kind. Popular. You found yourself measuring yourself against her in a sick competition that you knew you’d never win. 
You could feel the tears prickling at your eyes. You figured it was best to go ahead and cry. You thought a letter would help. You could vent and get all the things you wanted to say off your chest. Get the hurt out so you could find a way to begin to move on, to accept the fact that Eddie Munson was never and will never be your’s.
You searched in your backpack for your journal. 
Huh.
You could have sworn you took it to school with you, but maybe you had been mistaken. You checked around your room and came up empty handed. Before you let yourself freak out, you decided to check your bag one more time. You flipped through all your notebooks and binders.
Math.
Physics.
History.
Latin.
Wait….
You pulled open the second to last notebook.
March 18th, 1986 – Notes on The Gold Rush
Oh fuck.
If you had your history notes notebook, then that meant…No. You couldn’t even think it. You felt sick and your skin began to crawl. 
Eddie had your journal.
You were mentally kicking yourself again, ready to throw yourself from your bedroom window. Why, God? Why had you chosen near identical notebooks for both your personal letters journal and your history notes. Why didn’t you check before handing the notebook to Eddie? 
You could feel the tears again, your stomach continuing to do somersaults. There was no way you could ever show your face at Hawkins High ever again. He and the Hellfire club were probably laughing their selves to death over your letters at this very moment. You began to shake. Every shortcoming you’d been made aware of paled in comparison to the biggest mistake you’d ever made staring you right in the face. 
You’d tried to play sick the next day. Begged and pleaded with your mother to let you stay home. She wouldn’t budge. It was Friday, you thought. If Eddie could get away with all those years of skipping class, then surely you skipping one day would be okay. You wouldn’t get caught.
So, you hid yourself in the library. The dimly lit, never dusted back isle where the old encyclopedias were kept. No one ever came back here, not even the librarians. Not since the new encyclopedia editions were acquired and kept at the front of the library to prevent vandalism and theft.
The final warning bell for first period rang and you tucked your legs under you and braced yourself to not move from that spot for the rest of the school day. It was Friday. If you survived today, you could have the whole weekend to elaborately plan your sudden death so that you’d never have to face Eddie Munson ever again. You pulled your Walkman out and settled in for a long day or overthinking. 
At some point between third period and lunch you had drifted asleep. You were awoken by someone lightly shaking your shoulder. Your drowsy eyes opened and lazily pulled your headphones off. You looked up and those damned big, dark eyes were staring down at you. You felt your stomach drop when your eyes darted to what he was holding in his left hand. The notebook.
A heat took over your face and suddenly the carpet was far more captivating than Eddie’s stupid, pretty eyes. 
“You’re seriously not gonna say anything?” Eddie sounded hurt.
“I-…You were never meant to see that.” You whispered.
“Then why’d you give this to me,” He waved the notebook in front of your face, forcing you to look at it rather than the floor. 
“It- It was an accident. It unfortunately looks a lot like my history notes notebook.” You sighed, there was no way you could escape this conversation now. He had read it. How much he read was still up in the air, but he’d obviously read enough. Enough to be confronting you in the back of the library. 
Your eyes were burning holes through the notebook which was still held in front of your face. You heard Eddie let out an exasperated sigh and then he dropped down in front of you onto his heels. You felt your eyes begin to water again. Hours of crying last night and yet your body still had tears left to produce. 
His right hand came up to life your chin, forcing you to look at him. His eyebrows were pinched, causing a crease between his brows. You wanted to reach up and smooth the lines from his face. He looked too serious like this. 
“Did you mean it?”
“I- Look, Eddie, they were just stupid letters. I-“
“Did you mean what you wrote?” He asked again.
You wanted to throw up. You could feel the tears about to fall over your lash line. In that moment, you thought about renouncing God if you didn’t die of embarrassment before the end of that conversation. What a cruel God he’d be to let you flounder like that. To leave you to the wolves. 
“Yes.” You whispered, and it was barely even that as the word got caught in your throat on a sob you prayed wouldn’t come out. 
A painful silence took over. Eddie staring at you. You, unable to look away, starring right back at Eddie. This silence was so unlike that first silence that overtook you both that first day in the back of his van. 
“Y/N,” Eddie said, and it sounded so tender. Your heart hammered in your chest, a small glimmer of hope. Maybe he felt the same way too. Maybe he read your letters and felt seen, felt your love.
A soft crooning, pleading words, floated into the dead air between the two of you.
So please, please, please
Let me, let me, let me
Let me get what I want
This time…
“Eddie.” You said, silently begging him to say something. Hoping that he’d just lean in and kiss you. 
“Y/N….” He began.
So for once in my life
“We’re friends, right? We’re really good friends,” Eddie continued, and the soft lilt in his voice fed the small hope you allowed your heart to fester. 
Let me get what I want
“And you know Chrissy and I…” He trailed off.
Lord knows it would be the first time…
“Well, Chris…I asked her out yesterday. Since she’s not with Jason anymore,” He pressed.
Oh.
“And she said yes.” 
You couldn’t stop the few tears that managed to escape. Eddie used his free hand to brush them away and everything felt like a very cruel joke. It was Eddie’s turn to silently beg you to say something, his big eyes boring into you expectantly. But you took your moment. A moment to compose yourself, because if you have spoken right then, you weren’t sure you wouldn’t just sob. 
You swallowed hard, “T-that’s wonderful, Eddie. Really, I’m happy for you.”
He looked at you skeptically
“Eddie,” You sighed. You knew it would go like this. Chrissy fucking Cunningham. You couldn’t even hate her for this. You had no right. “I’m fine. I’ll be fine.”
You figured he either could see how hard this was on you or he truly believed you. But what he said next would leave you crying on your bathroom floor all weekend.
“Yeah…yeah, it was just a crush, right?” He sounded like he was trying to convince himself rather than you. “It’ll pass.”
As if a year and change of pining, admiring, and more recently getting to know him would just pass. But you nodded and smiled weakly at him. He smiled back stood up. He held his hand out to you which you took and used to help pull you to stand. With you both standing, he meekly passed you the notebook that was still in his hand. 
Another silence, more awkward than anything.
“So, I’ll see you around?” He asked.
“Uh, yeah, of course. Thursday, right?” You replied.
He hesitated, at war with himself.
“Yeah, right. Thursday. I’ll be here.” He conceded. 
You didn’t even exchange goodbyes. He looked at you for another moment and then left and sucked all the air out of the room. You stumbled to the closest restroom and locked yourself in a stall before you allowed yourself to cry, fully cry. You’d spend your entire weekend in a similar position at home.
Come the following week, Eddie was nowhere to be seen in your shared classes. You’d only caught a few glimpses of him at lunch with his club, laughing and jeering at jocks. You watched in passing, choosing to eat your lunch in the library instead of your normal table. You’d caught glimpses of him leaving school too. You heard his laughter first. And then her’s. Chrissy’s laugh was just as beautiful as her. The two of them snuck out from under the bleachers and you’d turned away as the leaned in to steal a kiss. You began taking a different route home, one that avoided the track and field. 
Thursday after school found you sitting in the library with your history notes open. You had somehow convinced yourself that Eddie would show up. He did not. A naïve part of you told yourself that he just needed a little more time to process what had happened and that next week he’d be back and ready to study. Another Thursday came and another Thursday was spent alone, afterschool in the library. You had been hopeful, but you weren’t an idiot. You didn’t stick around the following Thursday to be reminded of your lost friend. 
Your life faded back to ghosting around the halls of Hawkins, always in the background. The remainder of senior year simultaneously dragged and fly by. Acceptances letters flooded your mailbox. Turns out all those years of studying and neglecting yourself of a social life paid off. You were University of Chicago bound, class of 1990. The last remaining weeks of high school were filled with empty seats and inattentive teachers. You hadn’t even entertained the idea of showing up to prom, opting to stay home and watch Casablanca on video for the 18th time. Your rental from Family Video was far overdue.
You’d heard through the gossip grapevine that Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson had finally done it. He’d finally graduated high school. He was gonna get his diploma and run right out of town. 
“He’s gonna follow Chrissy to California. She got into Berkley.”
“I heard he’s gonna pursue music out there.”
“I heard he wants to propose.”
You had found yourself somewhat happy for Eddie. He really was getting out of this stupid town. He was happy. And, you supposed, in the end that’s all you’ve ever wanted for him. After watching him be ostracized by the entirety of Hawkins. In a way, you loved Chrissy for subsiding that treatment a bit. Folks figured if Chrissy trusted him, they could too. And that made you smile. 
Graduation came and passed, and you found solace that you and Eddie’s uncle weren’t the only ones who cheered when the name Edward Munson was announced. 
Perhaps Eddie was right, to an extent. Maybe your crush would pass. You found that your thoughts weren’t consumed by him as often as they once were. You’d gotten a summer job at a plant nursery on the edge of Hawkins. You tried to convince yourself you didn’t take the job purely because it was a 45 minute drive outside of town and there was no way Eddie Munson or Chrissy Cunningham would ever step foot inside, but it had been a big factor considering the two were always out on dates. 
The middle of summer found you pushing through drunk bodies at Jason Carver’s house. Your first party. Nancy Wheeler of all people and her mom had come through at your job – something about sprucing up the yard for the Fourth of July – and your ex lab partner had somehow convinced you to come out. You’d heard she was heading to California to be with her boyfriend, Jonathan Byers. He’d gotten into a technical school out there and she’d be attending Stanford on a full academic scholarship. Seemed everyone was heading west. Everyone including Eddie…
No.
You pushed the thought away from you. You were going to this damn party. You were going to show Hawkins you weren’t a loser, just this once. And no fucking way where Eddie and Chrissy going to show up at Chrissy’s ex’s summer party. And the party was fun. You genuinely had fun, until you heard that stupid laugh coming from the front foyer area. 
Before you could even catch a glimpse of him, you were pushing through drunk bodies. Your eyes were darting everywhere, anywhere looking for a hiding place. Some dark corner to tuck yourself into until they passed, and you could escape. You would do anything to avoid the awkwardness of having to face Eddie Munson again.
You’d settled on the small sunroom off the dining room. The doors had been closed and the party has seemed to be oblivious to the empty room. Most had opted to bypass it in favor of the back porch and pool. It was the perfect spot to sit and nurse your fourth drink of the night. The alcohol was settling in you. You weren’t quite drunk, but you weren’t exactly sober either. You let your eyes watch the various people jumping in the pool and dancing on the porch. You rolled your eyes at Jason and his goons taking turns doing keg stands. You weren’t sure how long you’d been there before a voice chilled you to the bone.
“Y/N?”
You froze. You didn’t dare to turn and see who had said your name. You’d know that voice anywhere. Your breathing felt a little erratic, but you were more than pleased at your ability to know show your terror on your face.
“What are you doing in here by yourself?”
“Just people watching. Never was one for parties.”
“I figured. I never saw you at one before this one.” 
You nodded, still avoiding his gaze, “Nancy Wheeler invited me.”
“Never met anyone who could say ‘no’ to a Wheeler. Her little brother is the pushiest little shit,” He laughed.
“Did you need something, Eddie?” You cut through the small talk, the alcohol giving you a boost of courage to turn and look at him. 
“Didn’t know I needed to have a reason to talk to my friends.” Eddie looked down and shuffled his feet. 
“Friends?”
“Y-yeah, we’re friends right?” Eddie asked.
“Eddie, you haven’t spoke to me in three months”
The flash of guilt that ran across his face wasn’t lost on you. He nodded.
“Well, you know communication goes both ways.” 
You saw the regret on his face the moment the words left his mouth. You sucked in a breath and his shoulders tensed, like he was waiting for you to go off on him.
Instead, your leveled voice replied, “You know that’s not fair.”
Eddie nodded and mumbled, “I know. I know.”
Silence.
You felt the need to apologize. For what you weren’t entirely sure. 
“I’m sorry-“
“Chris and I broke up.”
Silence.
“What?” You asked breathlessly.
Eddie’s eyes darted around the floor and suddenly you were taken back to that stupid library all those weeks ago. 
“She’s going to California. We decided it’d be better to break things off.”
“When?”
“Three weeks ago. It was mutual.”
You fixed him with a look when he dared to dart his eyes up to meet yours’s. 
“Mostly mutual,” He elaborated, “I mean it sucks, we were having fun. But that’s all it ever really was, y’know?” 
You didn’t.
“But I think we both knew in the long run that it wouldn’t work out. She wasn’t made for someone like me, and I wasn’t made for someone like her. We’re on different paths.” 
You couldn’t fully decipher the way he was looking at you on top of processing his words. 
“I’m sorry to hear that,” and you were. You’d hoped in the course of their relationship that the new friendships Eddie had made were not circumstantial. That he wouldn’t fall back into the role of the town scape goat, the Freak everyone could blame when things go wrong. 
“It’s alright. What high school relationship every really works out?” He laughed and you felt it was genuine. You had become a self-proclaimed professional body language reader in your many years of just watching people. He didn’t seem tense. He was nervous. You could tell from the way he kept shuffling his feet and shifting his weight. 
“Why are you telling me this, Eddie?” 
He quit fidgeting and stared at you. The dark room making his wide eyes look like inky pools of black, swallowing all light. He didn’t speak right away, instead he began moving again. This time, he moved to sit down in the chair adjacent to the loveseat you occupied. You were painfully aware of how close you were. The past few months you’d done everything to put a considerable amount of distance between the two of you – figuring, hoping, that space would allow you to forget that you’d had any kind of relationship with Eddie outside of your pining and here he was now breaking every barrier you’d set up to protect yourself. 
“Eddie,” you said his name so tenderly.
“I fucked up with you, Y/N. I fucked up something that could’ve been really great.” Eddie’s voice wavered slightly, anyone else wouldn’t have noticed. But you did.
“Eddie, don’t.”
“Please. Please let me make it up.”
“Eddie, you’re being mean. Stop.”
“Y/N…” He was at a loss for words.
“I spent weeks, months falling in love with you and, although, I never planned on that coming to light for you, it did. And you didn’t feel the same then so how do you expect me to believe you feel the same now?” 
You gave him a beat to respond if he wanted to, but he didn’t.
“I’m leaving for Chicago in a month.”
“What?” He asked breathlessly.
“I’m going to college in Chicago.”
“Oh.”
“Oh,” you echoed. 
“I’m really proud of you, Y/N.”
You smiled at that, genuinely smiled. 
“Thank you, Eddie.” 
You saw your opportunity to avoid where the conversation had been headed and you changed the subject quickly.
“And what about you? What will you get up to now that you’re free from Hawkins High?”
“Oh, uh,” He laughed humorlessly, “My uncle got me a job out at the plant he works at. I started last month. Been good so far, decent pay.”
“You’re staying?”
“Well, I don’t exactly have the means to leave right now, but I think I want to, eventually.” Eddie said sheepishly.
“Eddie, if anyone should be leaving this shithole town behind, it’s you. You’ve got too much talent for a place like this,” You could feel a small bubble of anger in your stomach. Not anger towards Eddie, but perhaps his circumstances. You knew he wasn’t rich. Knew he lived in the trailer park with his Uncle, but you just couldn’t imagine all that potential being wasted away in a town like Hawkins, IN. 
“Ah, then who would be the town freak?” He jabbed at himself.
“Quit that.” 
His eyes bulged. He’d never really hear you speak with that tone of voice. It reminded him of being scolded as a child. 
“Quit talking about yourself like you’re not one of the most creative and talented people I know. God, Eddie, you’ve got magnetism, y’know? You’re not an idiot like everyone tries to say you are. You’re so smart. You could be a writer or a- a musician. You could probably get into some writing fellowships or something. God, Eddie you know you’re special and I’m tired-“
You couldn’t finish your words as his mouth crashed into yours, cutting you off. You couldn’t even find the sense to push him off you. You melted into that kiss. A small whimper escaped you and the kiss turned hungrier. Eddie was above you know as you were lain back onto the loveseat, his knee slotting between your legs. 
The kiss deepened and he used his tongue to coax sinful noises from you. His hands roamed and explored your upper body, ghosting over your breasts. You ground your hips down to get whatever friction you could on the desire pooling between your legs. 
Your mind raced.
You were kissing Eddie Munson.
You were making out with Eddie Munson.
You were practically dry humping Eddie Munson’s thigh in Jason Carver’s sunroom while a party raged beneath you at the pool. 
“Mmm, Eddie- Stop.”
It took him a moment to realize what you had said, and he pulled away. His cheeks were red, and his lips bruised from kissing. His eyes had a slight glaze to them.
“I’m sorry,” He apologized.
“It’s….It’s okay,” You assured him. 
“No, no- I didn’t even ask. I just. No one’s ever believed in me the way you do and you’re so pretty- fuck, are you the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen- and I just….I didn’t think.”
You found yourself smiling at his admission.
“So, you think I’m pretty?”
He let out a hearty laugh, “Yeah, yeah I really do.”
When the silence took over again, it wasn’t painful. It wasn’t awkward. It felt very much like that first silence. The one in the back of Eddie’s van. It felt…. exciting? No. 
Hopeful.
“Can I take you on a date?” 
You blinked. Once. Twice.
“Eddie,” you sighed, “I don’t wanna just have fun with you. I can’t let myself get hurt again.”
“I don’t wanna have fun with you,” He said
You stared.
“Wait- no that’s no- fuck. You’re making me nervous, okay? I just meant, I don’t wanna just have fun with you. Like, would having fun with you be….fun? Sure, but that’s not all I want, Y/N. I want to be with you.” Eddie confessed.
You could feel your resolve breaking, second by second. 
“But what about Chicago?” You chewed your lip nervously.
“I’m not asking you to give up school for me, sweetheart.”
Sweetheart. 
Another crack.
“Chicago’s what? Four hours away?”
“Three and a quarter if the rumors about your driving are true,” you joked. 
“I can come see you. We can meet in the middle. You can come see me. We can make it work,” Eddie’s optimism could lead a revolution, you’d decided. 
“You mean it?” You asked. You couldn’t find it in yourself to doubt him. He’d always talked about things so surely. 
“I mean it.” He nodded and continued, “And once I get enough money to get the hell out of here, I’m coming up there with you.” 
His hands reached out to hold yours and settled on the edge of your knees. You couldn’t stop the smile that took over your face.
“Y’know,” you began, “I heard Chicago’s got a pretty good music scene too.”
Eddie just grinned back at you and leaned in for another kiss of the many that you'd share in the coming years.
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girlblogger666 · 2 years
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Teen pregnancy Eddissy
An: i wanted to write a fic about this but here’s some headcanons instead ✨ also i kinda wanna include this into my secret dating au which shall b posted very soooooon! Enjoyyyy
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Okay so before any of this happened, Chrissy would still be “dating” Jason, but banging Eddie in secret
It kinda just happened like during the night she went to see Eddie for drugs one thing lead to the other and boom she realized she really liked Eddie
So the two of them kept doing their thanng while chrissy began to grow even more distant from her boyfriend
Eventually, her perfect best of both worlds came to a crashing end once she realized she got knocked up by none other than the freak himself
It doesn’t bother her bc really she loves Eddie, it just heightens her panic. so of course before she tells baby daddy, she frantically breaks up with Jason, leaving him heartbroken and confused
Eddie would immediately know somethings up so as he waits for her a few minutes after the bell has rung and no other students are around, she confesses
“Eddie,” she’d look up at him with her eyes starting to water, “I’m pregnant.”
Eddie wants to laugh maybe even cry, but he doesn’t because he’s old enough to know majority of it is his fault and he needs to take responsibility from his actions
It never once crosses his mind to leave her or get upset, instead he comforts her by holding her and letting her calm down before they can both decide over their options
Ultimately, chrissy decides she wants to keep it
She’s 17, he’s 19 and they’re almost done their senior year, the months left in school won’t be enough to make chrissy stop continuing her classes
Still, they worry because none of them have enough money to support a baby financially and Chrissy knows the second she breaks the news to her mother, she’s getting kicked out of her house
Chrissy would try to push it off, secretly throwing up every morning as the weeks progress and deep down it hurts her because sometimes she feels as if she’s alone and really wishes Eddie could be there holding back her hair or rubbing soothing circles on her shoulder
It’s not to say that Eddie isn’t doing nothing as he gets a job while managing to finish high school for good
The pressure becomes too much for chrissy and one day she just breaks down after Eddie picks her up and seeing her practically sob into pieces is enough for him to convince her to move in his place
On the night that Chrissy packs as much as she can fit into Eddie’s van, she doesn’t tell her parents anything besides a little letter she wrote explaining as much as she wanted to
Like majority of them do, the rumours spread around school about Chrissy and Eddie, but no one believes it and it’s better off that way
Chrissy would enjoy sleeping in Eddie’s bed every night and getting to wake up next to him on the mornings that their peace isn’t disturbed by her sudden nausea
Also Uncle Wayne would know because Eddie can’t lie to him without feeling like a total douche, but he’d be super supportive and try his best to help out the young couple with whatever he can do
So on the days that Chrissy really can’t get out of bed due to how shitty she feels, she spends her time with Wayne in the trailer
He makes her green tea in one of his many mugs hanging around and tells her stories about Eddie as a baby that make her want to cry out in laughter
The stories make her feel just a tiny bit of excitement for when her baby will arrive and how it might just be an exact copy it’s father
But for the time being, she’d shove those thoughts aside because she still has finishing high school on her mind
Her pregnancy would also be a little hard for her because of her eating disorder, but it gives her the right motivation to start bettering herself one day at a time for the baby’s sake
Eddie really treasuring every moment spent with Chrissy because of how hard he’s been working both to graduate and his job
Luckily, the last months of class fly by, even though they were a tedious pain for the couple, and the two of them graduate together
Chrissy is barely showing and is so happy she gets to relax for the whole summer without ever worrying about the harsh backlash she would’ve received from all the other students
Eddie on the other hand, smiles at the tiny sonogram pic he secretly keeps in his wallet and is proud of himself for turning around his life 💕
Tysmmm for reading!! Idk if I should make a part two cuz these kinda felt long, but reqs are always open ✨💁🏻‍♀️
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dino-mp3 · 2 months
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blog intro :)
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3-23-24
Hello I’m Dino! I wanted to make an introduction post for my tumblr since I decided I wanted to start posting to motivate myself and others! I thought it would be nice to list my personal goals, interests, etc. :)
also pls ignore any grammar issues I don’t feel like putting this through Grammarly :,)
Goals
Work towards a 4.5 gpa: I have currently maintained a 4.2 gpa for this school year I wish it was 4.5, but I have 2 b’s :( So I’m going to work towards a 4.5 for this last quarter and senior year!
Become a better speaker: My ultimate career is to be a lawyer! With that comes working to be a better speaker. I get quite nervous when it comes to taking to a large group of people and start to talk fast. On top of this at my mock trial meet I messed up my direct horribly because of how nervous I was to talk in front of the judge and jury :,)
Get best lawyer during Mock Trial Comp: I won best attorney this year, but I don’t think I deserved it…I want to be more confident in my win this time around!
4 or 5 on AP Exams: I want to get a 4 or 5 on both my AP Lang and APUSH Exams in May! I need to study and practice hard though, but I’m willing to put the hard work in ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ
Practice flute more often: I play the flute for my schools band and while I have only been playing for 7 months now I have to keep up with people who have been playing for 5+ years :,) With that I want to practice more to keep up and for my personal interest of just becoming more skilled with the flute!
Turing in homework on time: I have made a bad habit of turning my homework in late which is so bad oml I need to get out of it
Exercise: I want to start working out regularly to lose some weight :) While I’m at a healthy weight I just want to lose a few pounds for aesthetic purposes, but in a healthy manner!
Love myself more: I forget to remind myself that I have gotten so far and I have evolved over the years. I want to make sure that I know that I’m worthy of love even when I’m at my lowest.
Interests
Music: I’m a big fan of all genres (even some country songs too) but I’m a big listener of k-pop! But here is a list of my favorite groups + musicians: Red Velvet, Melanie Martinez, Laufey, Idelwork, Frank Sinatra, NMIXX, Ive, Megan Thee Stallion, Flo Milli, Poppy, Lesserafim, Aespa, Newjeans, Infinity Song, Kiss of Life, and many more!
Media: I’m not going to list every kind of media I’m into but here is a small taste! Big fan of ARGs, Indie Horror games (puppet combo specifically), Mascot Horror games (FNAF + Poppy Playtime), Anime (although I haven’t watched anything recently, but my fave is TBHK), K-dramas and Thai-dramas, YouTube video essays (TRO, iNabber, Primik, Stephanie Soo), Cartoons (Owl House, Gravity Falls, Amphibia, MLP, stuff like that), RPG + Dating Sim games (Shooter game HATER here), Sitcoms, Snoopy/Peanuts, Miraculous Ladybug (biggest MariChat lvr) Twisted Wonderland (Azul my love) and a BUNCH more things I’m into, but I’m not going to list them all like I said :,)
Hobbies: Doing my nails, playing my flute, writing fanfics (don’t judge I BEGGG), reading (pls recommend books for me to read, I love the classics too), deco (for my photo cards and notebooks lol), and makeup!
I think that should suffice for my introduction, though it looks a bit long…I’m a blabber could you tell?
Anyways thank you for sticking around for the end! If you want to see any updates on my goals or read my blabber about my interests don’t hesitate to follow me! (Also follow me on Ao3 @/dino_mp3 if you’re an Azul lvr bc all my fanfics are about him) This tumblr is more of a casual stop for me to be more myself and work towards a better me :) But thank you again and I hope you have a good day/night! Don’t forget to drink water :D
-Dino
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