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lazzledazzler · 3 years

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Lazzle's Rune Factory 5 Review

Alright so here are my thoughts and experiences with RF5! This is a big boy so buckle in earthmates...

Obviously this review will contain spoilers, read at your own risk.

Initial thoughts upon playing...

Great opening! I enjoyed the jazz music~ I did feel like it leaned a bit more towards the male player though. It definitely feels like a rune factory game. It's familiar, and controls are easy to get accustomed to for the most part. The mold is there and rf5 doesn't stray too far from its predecessors which is comforting for veterans. That being said, I'm not going to pull any punches and will critique this game harshly. Keep in mind as updates for the game are released not all things discussed in this review will be as relevant overtime!

Let's hear some thoughts on...

The story/plot. The plot is enjoyable overall. I'm not crazy about the whole Seed organization thing but it was a neat idea. They address the Sechs Territory and it is confirmed that the game takes place some decades after RF4. But by the end of it, I didn't feel like I really accomplished anything because it felt like I barely did anything really. Also they left a lot of stuff unanswered. I'm not even sure I understood the message they were sending, if they were trying to send a message at all. The main story is too short, and it doesn't involve enough of the townsfolk. You're basically doing everything yourself in secret the whole time and the townsfolk barely know what's actually going on. Out of the love interests, Lucas plays the largest part in the story, followed by Priscilla and Scarlett. The story feels targeted at male audiences--at least that's how I felt. You, the player, have a larger role in the game, much like in RF3 and I was glad to see this. As of right now there are only two arcs. Praying for DLC 3rd arc...!

Protagonists. The latest protagonists to join the crew of Earthmates are...decent. Their designs are nothing special unfortunately, though I appreciate Alice's more than Ares's. Appearance-wise they lack personality and creativity. Personality wise I am pleasantly surprised with how sociable they are. They're not exactly quick witted and sassy like Lest/Frey were in rf4, or as endearing as Micah in rf3, but they have a certain realness to them that makes their reactions to things believable. I'm certain Xseed will see to making them a bit more sarcastic in their localizing efforts, so let's all look forward to that. Overall though, while I appreciate their mannerisms, they don't really measure up to all the previous amnesiacs we've grown to love over the decades.

Characters. Overall I enjoy all the characters introduced in Rune Factory 5! I feel like there is someone for everyone in this game on some level. The voice acting was pretty good for every character. The designs are very much Rune factory. Like OG runefa, compared to rf4 ( 4 kind of strayed from their usual style) which I like. Characters still have their own signature quirks that you find endearing. Although I would have liked to see more variety? Like we've had mermaids, univir, half monsters, vampires, etc in previous titles but rf5 only gives us the usual (half) elf, dwarf, and then a succubus (physically she doesn't have unique features aside from the ears and heart eyes), and some were-people. I was hoping for something more unique to really give that classic runefa vibe.

Dungeons/Battles. I'm pretty split on this one. On the one hand, the dungeons have more depth due to the 3D aspects. They've included more contraptions that are very fun to see even if they aren't executed that well. So I'm grateful for that. On the other hand, the dungeons are insanely short imo. It doesn't take long at all to get to the boss. The puzzles are also pretty subpar and few compared to RF4. Fighting monsters is similar to the other games. You can lock on now but I only use it when I'm trying to use my Seed Circle. The lock on feature is actually counter-intuitive and makes it harder to dodge. Weapon mechanics have shifted a bit. There’s a feature that makes you invincible to damage if you time the R button dash correctly. Axes and Hammers are significantly slower than in older games? Like. I thought I was in slow motion it was so slow. Lances are also harder to use as well? I'm questioning my sanity here. I don't know if it's a bug or intentional either.

Farming. Not much has changed from previous games mechanics wise. They added new types of special crops which is neat. The camera view changes to overhead when you go near your fields though, and it can make you dizzy/uncomfortable. It actually makes it a bit difficult to see at times so I wish there was a way to adjust the angle. If you are tilling corn or dried weeds to improve the soil, you need to place them separately if you don't want to use the entire stack. Otherwise, it will till the entire stack on the land if you place them all down at once. The flower shop is unlocked late in the story. Weird thing to do considering you need flowers to make medicine. Not to mention the fact that you wont have access to the fertilizer that increases defense against typhoons? During typhoon season? Thinking emoji...

The town. I have to say Rigbarth's design is poor compared to Sharance, Selphia, etc. It's too big and it takes too long to get around. Everything is too spaced out and there aren't enough warp points to make it easier on players. I don't want to walk an entire mile up a hill to talk to one person and then walk all the way down to the beach to speak to another. It doesn’t really feel like a ‘town’.

OST/BGM. Music was good, though nothing really stood out to me where I'd go "damn this slaps" or something. I think they might've had some old soundtracks from rf2 or something because it felt really nostalgic at times.

We need an exterminator. (Bugs Bugs Bugs)

Marvelous, I don't know how to tell you this buuut...your customers are NOT your testers. When you release a game, you need to make sure it's not littered with glitches because customers don't enjoy dealing with them and will drop the game!

Here are some of the types of glitches I encountered:

Crashing. Game would randomly crash or freeze and close at any moment. Sooooo frustrating! Sometimes you get lucky with the autosave feature, but the autosave only activates every morning at 6am in your room and then when you warp to a dungeon level/floor. So when you're in the middle of your daily tasks in town and it crashes, you have to start all over. Marveloussss no one enjoys losing their progress in a game I promise you that much.

Lag. The dialogue bar is seriously slow, especially after loading your file. Crafting/Cooking screen lags. When you press the Y button to skip through dialogue it lags like hell. Pretty much after every time you load the game will lag, the audio will lag if you're in a battle, everything is just. so. slow.

Repeating dialogue. So if you close your game entirely (or if it crashes) naturally you'll reload your file to continue where you left off. There's a bug that will cause all NPCs to repeat the last dialogue that occurred from whatever plot related thing you did last. So for example, if the last thing you did in the story was unlock Ludmilla, everyone in town will naturally have some dialogue about her. But even after seeing all this dialogue and even saving, if the game is closed and reloaded you'll have to read all that dialogue again from townsfolk. It got really annoying after a while.

Monster taming. One time I tamed a monster but once I named it and hit 'ok' the monster never showed up in my barns? Just. gone. Okaaaay then...? Additionally, I expanded one of my monster barns but all of the monsters I tamed wouldn't appear in the added room. You get 4 monsters for each room but the monsters I tamed would show up in the original room. Meaning I had like 7 monsters in one room! I tried to bring them into the newly added room but they would just warp back to the other room. Sad.

Pond Glitch. I fished in the pond located in Sasayaki Forest and left the fish I caught but didn't want laying around the water's edge. If you leave fish around the pond's edge and go to sleep, the next morning you will be teleported to the pond and trigger the fairy dialogue as if you had thrown all of the fish into the pond??? So the dialogue of her telling you she wants 'X item, not this!' will trigger over and over for all of the fish you left at the water's edge. RIP.

Party member Bug. I had Martin in my party and I made him leave. Then when I went into my monster barns to get a monster pal to join me instead it showed me Martin's portrait???? Also I've encountered a bug where I can no longer ask anyone to join my party for some unknown reason. The R &L button prompt was just gone when I reloaded.

Errors. When cooking or crafting, the dialogue box shows up sometimes...

Typos. Random average typo here and there. Not a real biggie but there is one instance where the heroine will use the japanese male pronoun "boku" instead of "watashi" which really convinced me that this game was completely intended for men lol.

Let's talk about Pros

The good stuff. The stuff that makes you all warm and fuzzy inside.

Plot Advancing. Now I'm gonna put this as a pro because I'm certain the average player will enjoy this even though I do not. There are now markers on the map to show you where to go to advance the plot. This is all well and dandy, but it also made the story less appealing for me because you don't need to go around town and speak to residents for clues or assistance to advance anything in the story.

3D Graphics The 3D models are all amazing. The interior designs of the houses/buildings are also incredibly detailed and realistic.

Collecting items. Now there's a feature that will allow you to collect items into your inventory just by walking over them. This is pretty neat and welcome for the most part. Once the item is sparkling, you can walk over it and it'll go into your rucksack automatically. This also makes lumbering and mining go much faster. Yay!

The miraculous L pocket. Now you can customize the categories that appear in your L pocket by going to the rucksack tab in the menu. This is a super neat feature that makes things easier on players who want to manage their items in a format that suits them.

Weapon/Tool Toggling. You can now toggle between your equipped weapon and tool by pressing the left or right buttons on the trackpad.

Collecting lumber/material stone. Oh lord this is probably the most welcome improvement moving forward from the previous game. You can now put all of the lumber and material stone from your inventory into its storage at once. This also applies to fodder for tamed monsters. Well done Hakama.

Autosave. This feature is a welcome addition to the series. The game will save your data every morning and every time you enter a dungeon. Autosave has really saved my ass a few times when I made a huge error in judgement so I'm incredibly grateful for this feature. And it doesn't save over your actual save file--there's a separate autosave file at the very top. So if you messed up something but already saved on your main file, you can still salvage your mistake by reloading the autosave! I just wish it activated a bit more often sometimes.

Warping. Now we can warp to each level in a dungeon as well as certain places on the map in town. It's pretty convenient for the most part.

Increased party members. Now you can have up to 3 members in your party! Hooray! Party members act more intelligently than in older games. Scarlett can use the Seed circle to assist you in fights. I think she also tosses healing potions at you occasionally. So far, no one has tossed a dish at me if I haven't eaten like Kiel and Clorica did in rf4. But I have been hit by a failed dish (from reinhardt?) and a healing potion (from scarlett). Scarlett, Priscilla, and Reinhardt are the most helpful when dungeon crawling in my experience. Some of them however, (looking at you Doug) don't shut the hell up with their one line of dialogue they have and repeat it constantly.

Seed Circle. This neat feature allows you to capture monsters. By charging it and releasing you can capture monsters for the bounty system or add them to your party temporarily. If you throw it without charging it, you can stun monsters in place momentarily or grab things from far away. When stunning monsters, it can also give you the monster's drop item occasionally. Unfortunately it uses a lot of RP so it can be difficult at times.

Combo attacks. This is a neat feature that I appreciate and use often for boss fights. They do some serious damage so it's good to save them for the bosses. The actual cutscenes aren't that impressive, and feel kind of subpar when you get down to it but I think it's a start in the right direction.

Farm Dragons. I'm listing this as a pro although I really just see it as a new feature. Farm dragons have fields on their backs that you can place monster barns on and farm on. Giving them certain crystals will give your fields boosts in certain criteria, like length of growth, soil quality, you get it. I personally don't use the crystals because I couldn't give a shit lmao I have men and women to woo here. But if you're into this kinda thing then it's a pro.

Storage. When opening your storage box, fridge, etc. you can actually hit the R & L buttons to switch between ALL of your other storages. Looooove thissss. Great addition. So much faster to put items away in their respective places.

Crafting/Forging. Now we can also use the R & L buttons to alternate between the different weapon types/accessory/gear types instead of having to exit the menu and going back in each time you want to make something different.

Cooking. More recipes have been added. Yay!

Days are longer now. More time to get shit doneeeee ayyyy

Fishing. They've added many more fish to the game! Now the player will shout something when you get a bite, making it easier for you to hit B at the right moment. Nice. Also if you fail or press B too early, the fish doesn't vanish most of the time. Also nice. There is now a feature to fish with another person's assistance. Once a day you can investigate the sign near the fishing station and someone might offer to lend you a hand. Press the B button at the right moments on the slider and you can get a rare fish that can't be caught normally.

Monsters. New types of monsters! Love the designs. Even the monsters that are the same but just have different skins are really neat. They look great in the 3D format too. You can even ride with up to two people on certain monsters! Some bosses had awesome designs while others...were bad.

New Types of Furniture. The carpenter store has a wide arrange of furniture you can buy for your home. It also has wallpapers and stuff which is really neat. Though unfortunately you can't even sit on some of the furniture so that's a shame.

Events. Now there is a system where events are triggered by approaching an icon on the map. This is probably an improvement to RF4's randomized system, though personally I found it annoying because it meant that I had to see the events before I could just enter a building normally. Sometimes I just wanted to get shit done and not have to read through walls of text for someone's love event when I just want to buy something.

Voiced Lines. The protagonist seems to have more voiced lines, as do other characters. Good!

Let's talk about Cons

Not including glitches. Oh boy. So many cons. Where do I start?

Dialogue. Probably the most notable con in the entire game. The dialogue is drastically minimal in comparison to previous games, especially rf4. There is probably a quarter of the amount of dialogue compared to rf4's insane amount of content if not less. Townsfolk repeat themselves. Often. Too often. Am I playing Harvest Moon? Originally I thought it was because the dialogue is randomized, but I think it's actually because more dialogue is unlocked as you raise townspeople's FP. Despite this, there's no linear build up where you start off as acquaintances and eventually become very close like in rf4 because of how sporadic the LP/FP is. Townsfolk don't even talk to each other. One of the greatest perks about runefa is the conversations townsfolk can have with one another. Residents randomly gathering in small groups to talk about anything. Previously you could add someone to your party and sometimes a dialogue will occur if you speak to the right person at the right time with that person in your party. This is nonexistent now. The only time they do this in rf5 is during the festivals. But, it will only trigger if you have unlocked all the characters in each marriageable lineup and they can't be in your party. The residents will talk about one another but that's pretty much it outside of town events. They got rid of all the minor dialogue that occurs too. Trying to sleep in someone's bed while they're right there? They wont comment. Inspecting objects in stores while the shopkeeper is present? Wont say anything. Take a character with you to a dungeon/boss fight? Their lips are sealed. Where's my sense of community? :(

FP/LP This ties into the dialogue issue. The rate at which LP/FP increases is sporadic as hell. You can go from 1FP/LP to 4FP/LP just by giving a gift sometimes. I wouldn't even speak to people and their affinity increased by like triple for no reason. Then it increases by like 2% for the longest time. Argh!!!

Graphics. I don't consider myself very picky when it comes to graphics. I don't really mind that the foliage and scenery are at the level of a ps2 game at best. I tried playing on my television initially, but the lag and camera operability was too much so I fully switched (haha puns) to handheld. One thing that sucked is that I literally cannot tell the difference between medicinal herbs, antidote grasses, and green grasses without the captions because the graphics are so indistinguishable. So when you're trying to pick up multiples of those items by holding the A button, you're just randomly walking over anything green in the hopes that you'll get the right ones...

Lack of Sound Effects. Something I noticed is they got rid of the sound effects that will play when you complete a puzzle or add someone to your party. When you try to brush a monster there's no sound for the '♪' they make when you successfully brush them. So it was hard for me to tell if I had actually brushed them or not. I was a bit saddened by the lack of cute sounds.

Too much free range. From the very beginning of the game, you're allowed to go pretty much wherever you want when leaving town. It was too easy to stumble into high enemy level territory without knowing, so when I was like level 5 so I got KO'd immediately.

Artwork. The portraits seem to be lower in quality somehow. Runefa has always had shitty portrait art imo but this time it's even worse. Many character's eyes looked fucked up. Though the 3D models are insanely good for mostly every character except Terry. Terry's 3D model looks Terryfying and I prefer his portrait.

Festivals. They've added some new festivals. Some I enjoy. Some not so much. They changed the format of the eating contest. It's horrible. Good luck with that one.

L pocket + R button? They got rid of the feature that lets you skip to the other end of your items when opening the L pocket by pressing R button. I really liked that feature because it made it faster to reach my items so I was bummed that they got rid of it.

Gotta go fast. Now when you speak to someone, it doesn't 'stop time' as you might say it did in previous games. So people are still moving about as you speak to someone, making it harder to catch up to people! Annoying!!!

Catch and release? Not in my farming simulator! Say goodbye to being able to toss a fish you caught back into the water. In fact, say goodbye to tossing anything you don't want anymore into the water. Now you just have an army of fish flopping on the ground around you. And with the auto pick up feature, they're probably going to end up in your inventory anyways once you try to move. There are still certain ponds with fairies that you can toss stuff into, but you'll have to deal with the fairy harping at you for giving her something she doesn't want.

Shop Hours. Oh god. The shop owners don't even open their stores at the correct hours? It says open at 9am. If you speak to them they won't open their store until like 9:07??? But Priscilla and Lucy will show up to work their part-time jobs at around 8:30am and you can buy stuff through them before 9am. So the actual shop owners (for the bread shop and general store) are pointless usually. Additionally, if the store is empty (but open) you can no longer add a shopkeeper into your party and then enter their store with them to buy things from them. Why. Just why. When you want to buy something that only a specific person sells (Only Hina sells fish, only Heinz sells misc items) you have to wait for them to finally decide to work in their own store. Wonderful.

Monster Item drops. Maybe I'm crazy but the monster drops are seriously a lot harder to get than in previous games. Especially boss drops. It's almost impossible to get the rare drops now. I don't even want to try anymore. And as far as I know, the only place to buy monster items is through Heinz, but his items are actually misc. items, not specifically monster drops. So you'll be lucky to check his store (whenever tf he decides to actually work) for any monster items you might want instead of farming for the drops. Sighs.

Difficulty. This game is too easy. There is little to no challenge whatsoever. I had to increase the difficulty setting to hard mode and it was still too easy. I beat it at level 139, never once did I need to grind or level. In fact, your character levels up way too quickly for the pace of the story. I had zero trouble with any of the bosses and even the final boss was a breeze. Quite sad. Though because I am not new to the franchise, it's likely that newcomers would have some trouble in the later parts of the story.

Fishing cons. Idk how you fck up fishing but they sure did. You have to stand further back now because the pole is so long that you'll miss the fish you're aiming for. In fact, it's seriously hard to aim period. You'll end up recasting more often than not. Fish come in the various sizes but they don't seem to have the darker or faded characteristics that can indicate whether it's a rare fish or not. The graphics make it hard to tell. The pros that i've already mentioned are welcomed but it doesn't negate the fact that I do not enjoy fishing like I did in previous games.

Mining/Lumbering Cons. You can no longer strike three times consecutively when mining/lumbering. This sucks lol. Even when you upgrade your axe or hammer, powering up the tool does nothing for getting wood and material stone--it only expands the area of your strike. So it takes longer to get wood/stone from stumps and rocks now since you have to strike the full 9 times but it's not too bad. It's also harder to aim now as well so that's also unfortunate.

Seasonal Fields? Kiss them goodbye! That's right, there are no seasonal fields in rf5 because devs are insane! You instead have the farm dragons that seem to look seasonal based on the fact that they are designed after elements like earth, water, and fire. But no, these dragons are simply extra fields for you to use. Here's a spoiler: you're not going to use those fields. You're just not. They're kinda useless unless you're obsessed with farming. Now you have to grow your crops out of season like the sad farmer that you are.

Farming cons. Seeds no longer tell you how long it takes to grow the crop. Why. As of June 29th, they fixed this with an update. But I still had to play the whole game without it so fuck you marvelous. The joystick is really sensitive? So when you're trying to use a fertilizer or something on your field you're likely to place it on the wrong 4x4 tile, wasting your fertilizer. So it’s best to hold down the R button when farming. Also the crops look uglie as hell.

Sleeping and warping cutscenes. Just like in rf4 there's a cutscene when you go to sleep that can be skipped easily by pressing A. In rf5, there's a cutscene to sleep and a cutscene when waking up. It takes a bit more than a second to skip these scenes so it gets annoying after a while. Warping is this new feature that replaces our beloved escape spell. Overall I appreciate the feature but I hate it for two reasons. One: there's an annoying ass cutscene for it each time you use it that could be much shorter. And Two: townsfolk now use warp even when inside the town. In previous games, someone exiting your party in town would just manually run to wherever they need to be. So you could easily chase after them if you need to talk to them or give them something. Now, party members use warp regardless of where you are at the time. So say you have someone at 7 hearts and you want to try confessing to them. You would have them join your party, save your game, and then have them leave your party and immediately speak to them and confess before they can run off. If it doesn't work you reload until it does. In RF5 this wouldn't work anymore because they will warp. Now you would have to save, run around town trying to find this person and hope they accept the confession. Otherwise you'll have to play hide and seek again because reloading your file will randomize the resident's locations (if they are not working in a shop)!!!! I often just waited until a festival day because then they will be at the plaza for most of the day and it has a warp point there.

Crafting/Forging/Cooking. They've removed the feature where you can press Y on the ingredients in the menu to add more of that particular item. I miss this feature :'(

Lacks incentive. There is no trophy room from my knowledge. The final dungeon that is meant to be like the sharance maze/rune prana isn't that hard to beat for skilled players and is only 20 floors. After you beat the main story and this dungeon there's not much else to do really.

Request Board. Unlike in rf4, you need to make sure you have accepted requests before you complete them or else it will not count. Previously, you could complete all sorts of tasks and Eliza would still recognize your work even if you accept their request after the fact. ie, shipping goods, harvesting crops, etc. So make sure you don't harvest your special crops before accepting the request it's for!

Return of the "Loli" Dragons... Yeah you read that right. We got more dragons in children's(???) bodies with skimpy clothes. I don't know anymore????¿¿¿

Can't marry the Milfs or Dilfs. Tragic.

Still no homo. Grow up Marvelous.

Reverse Proposal? Reverse Uno card-- Laid low by the patriarchy. You now have to buy the double bed and craft an engagement ring to propose to your man if you're playing as Alice. Marvelous this isn't what we meant when we said we wanted equal rightsssssss This can be seen as a pro if you're a softhearted babey who doesn't like rejecting bachelors' proposals because you feel bad :'( But this is a con for me because I don't want to spend money and materials on a double bed dammit!!!

Misc. Still can't stack dishes or fish. There's no green elemental fairy???All the other elemental ones are there except the green one? why??? Still can't tame the giant Wooly. Some bosses that have insanely awesome designs cannot be tamed and makes me wanna eat glass.

Let's talk about Love~

Relationships. We want them. And half of us only play these games for them. I've only played as the female heroine so far but I'll be updating this review as soon as I finish with the bachelorettes as the male hero.

Confessions

As usual, we must raise the love points of our beloved to 7 hearts before we can attempt to date them. However unlike in rf4, if you fail at a confession once, you will need to raise the LP up an entire level before you can try again with any chance of success. It's imperative you save before attempting a confession now.

Love Events

Each love interest has two love events that must be seen before you can date them. They're reminiscent of older game's style but I felt they could have been a biiiit more interactive or so? Or involved the town a bit more for some of them.

Dating

Once you get your honey to be your bf/gf, you get to choose the nicknames as usual. Then you can go on dates. The first three (non-festival) dates are actually events. You need to see all three events to get married.

Marriage Event

The final event you need to clear before you can marry your sweetie. In my honest opinion, so far for the boys, these events were rather disappointing. They lacked the drama and angst that sort of 'test' the love between the two when compared to rf4. Also this is a huge con for me personally and a minor spoiler but there are no special cutscenes at the end of the marriage event like in rf4. Instead, the cutscene takes place during your actual wedding. I was saddened by this because it took away the depth from the marriage events and the actual character? As it is just a cut and paste type of thing instead of an original cutscene for each person. They lack individualism this way. Also it kinda felt like a way for devs to avoid gay relationships and cut corners :^/....sus.

First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes...

Children!!!!!! This is actually one of the coolest additions in the game. Just like in rf3, you can have up to 3 children again! Your first child will resemble you, and you will have the option to choose its gender as well as its personality. There are 6 different children, (3 boys and 3 girls), all with different hairstyles, mannerisms, and seiyuus. Your answers will determine which child you get. A year after your first child is born, you will get the option to have a second child. You'll end up with twins, both resembling your partner. You won't get to choose the genders (it will be a boy and girl) but you will get to choose the personalities once more. The children all have canon names too and each kid is incredibly cute. And of course, you're still able to take your kid with you in your party~ ...Though you can only take one kid with you at a time.

So is RF5 good?

Yeah it's a fun game! My theory is that Marvelous forced the devs to release the game earlier than they were ready for, and that's why it's so lacking. But that doesn't mean it's not worth playing! I'd rate it 3.5/5 stars hehe. Not nearly as good as RF4 (full stop 5/5), or RF3 (4/5) but enjoyable nonetheless. I wouldn't recommend it as a first game to play from the series for newcomers though, I feel it's best for vets who can overlook all the cons thanks to loyalty and nostalgia. By the time it’s released in the West, the bugs should all be dealt with too.

So! Definitely buy this game! We want the series to continue and we want RF6 to be better than this--and hopefully Marvelous will make sure of that next time. If you're not a picky person I think you'll enjoy rf5 a lot. If you're like me and have high standards then, well, still pick it up and let it run its course. Then dust off rf4sp and cleanse your gaming palette >;^)

#rune factory 5 #rf5 spoilers #rune factory #rf5 #spoilers #review #rune factory 5 spoilers

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glassesandswords · 3 years

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Of Wings And Wheelchairs

Pairing: Levi Ackerman & Onyankopon, Levi Ackerman/Hange Zoe (mentioned)

Summary: Levi and Onyankopon sit in a coffee shop, waiting for Gabi and Falco to return from their small detour during their vacation together. Levi reminisces about the old Survey Corps veterans and their times together as Onyankopon listens. Soon, the conversation makes its way to a person the two knew very well- Hange.

Ao3 Link

“Let’s wait here.”

Levi and Onyankopon stopped at a coffee shop. With so many people bustling about, it was hard to find a place to relax for a while, especially with all the walking they had done. Well, at least all the walking that Onyankopon, Gabi and Falco had done- as Levi had been pushed around on a wheelchair by Falco the whole time. But the kids had spotted an ice cream vendor and left together to buy something to eat, and the older men decided to get a quick drink before continuing on with their journey.

The coffee shop had outdoor seating shaded by giant blue umbrellas that flared briskly over the round tables. A florist sold bouquets nearby. The scent of roses and lavenders wafted through the air, mingling with that of roast coffee.

“Are you sure letting Gabi and Falco go off on their own in a foreign land a good idea?” Levi asked as Onyankopon looked around for an empty table.

“They are fifteen now. They will be alright. Us, old men, shouldn’t be interfering with a pair of love-birds, so let them enjoy this vacation on their own.”

“You might be right about that.”

Onyankopon decided on an empty table on the opposite end of the florist and parked Levi next to him as he pulled a chair for himself. “Fifteen, huh?” Levi muttered, adjusting his wheelchair close to the table. “If they were in Paradis, they would have graduated from the cadet corps. But these two- they have had their fill of the battlefield way before that, being Marley’s warrior candidates and all.”

“Yes. That’s why they deserve to live like the carefree and free-spirited children they are right now.”

“Not that any child needs a reason to live like that. They all are equally deserving of happiness.”

“Of course,” Onyankopon called the waiter over to them. “A black tea and a black coffee, please.”

Levi noted how Onyankopon kept his favorite drink in mind and ordered it for him by default. Over the past three years, the two men had bonded over their shared losses and he had been a constant companion for Levi after the war. Onyankopon had helped him start a new life and set up his own tea shop after he retired in Marley, taking care of all the paperwork and technical details required.

“I heard you spent your childhood in the underground district within Wall Sina,” Onyankopon said as he watched the waiter leave with their order. “I wasn’t allowed there due to the restrictions on the volunteers, but I heard it was a rough place to live in.”

Levi raised an eyebrow. That piece of information was hardly common knowledge.

“I think I might have an idea of who babbled to you about that,” the face of a certain four-eyed abnormal popped up on Levi’s mind. “Yes. I was raised as a thug in order to survive that hellhole.”

“Did you have anyone close to you at that time? Your parents? Any siblings?”

Usually, Levi would have found it annoying if people dug into his past. But with Onyankopon, he did not really mind. “I was an only child,” he replied, leaning back on his wheelchair, “My mother died when I was young and the closest thing I had to a father was an uncle who abandoned me as soon as he realized that I could take care of myself.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, it’s an old story,” he waved his pity off, “I did have two close friends there. Farlan and Isabel. They were as good as a brother and sister to me.” A fond remembrance flitted over his face, as if he could see them in his mind’s eye as he spoke. “The three of us thought life above the ground, in a land touched by the sun would be better. Turns out it is all the same.”

It wasn’t hard for Onyankopon to make out that Farlan and Isabel were probably no more from how Levi’s voice dipped. He changed the topic to something lighter.

“But you finally retired from all your duties and responsibilities. How does it feel to go on vacations to foreign countries?”

“I’m surprised you are dragging me along. Not like I could be of any service anyway, after being permanently bound to this wheelchair,” Levi tapped on the metal armrest.

“You are too humble, Levi,” Onyankopon shook his head, “I’ve seen you offering guidance to Armin and the others whenever they need it.”

“I help them as much as I can, but in the end, it is nothing more than an old man’s advice.” Levi sighed, remembering a certain someone’s soliloquy in a forest. “Times have changed and perspectives are different. After the rumbling ended, Armin offered me retirement and I took it. But even if I were in top shape, I honestly don’t think I would want to do anything with the Alliance anymore.”

Onyankopon watched Levi as he gazed at the busy road. The man looked broken, like he had lost way too much in life. He reminded him of some of the volunteers who had seen their families killed and hometowns destroyed in front of their own eyes. For previously being known as ‘Humanity’s strongest soldier’, Onyankopon had not seen Levi in action a lot. But the way he held himself together during that day- exactly three years ago, after Odiha- was a testament to his immense internal strength. The man in front of him was a fighter, but the fight had taken its toll on him.

The waiter arrived with steaming drinks and served it on the table.

“How do you drink that bitter bean-juice?” Levi asked as Onyankopon took a careful sip, trying not to burn his tongue in the scalding liquid.

“Six years and you still haven’t warmed up to coffee, have you?”

“I prefer tea, usually that of my own shop.” He sipped his tea, holding it by the rim with his left hand. “But I have to admit, the aroma of coffee is quite enticing.” His voice went back to its hazy tone. “Mike would have liked it. That guy had a sharp nose for things like these.”

Though Onyankopon did not know the details, he knew Mike was probably one of Levi’s previous comrades.

Levi had a habit of talking about his fallen comrades now and then. He did not seem to care if the other person knew them personally or not. Onyankopon assumed that it was to remember and acknowledge their existence and stories, being the last living veteran from his original group.

He heard about the battle of Shiganshina that resulted in the complete decimation of the earlier Survey Corps and wondered if Mike was one of the people who died there. Or maybe he had been one of the many unfortunate victims who were killed by the hands of the pure titans long before. Onyankopon felt a small stab of guilt for following Zeke, who had caused nothing but pain for Levi and the rest of the Survey Corps, but he had his own circumstances. Choosing sides had blinded them from appealing to their common humanity, until Yelena had revealed to him the plan to offer assistance to Paradis before their first scouting expedition six years ago. He had almost convinced himself that the Paradis military would crush them with their titan power before they could put forth that proposal, but then, a certain Survey Corps Commander gave them the warmest welcome they could have received in the island of ‘devils’.

“Brings back memories,” he hummed over his coffee, “Remember, the first time we chatted was over a cup of tea in that tent?”

“Ah yes,” Levi nodded grimly, “Another one of that person’s stupidly optimistic ideas. It was a surprise that you volunteers actually agreed to it.”

There was a silence as Onyankopon knew exactly who he was referring to.

Levi sipped his tea. “Honestly, they’d come up with the most reckless ideas, that Four-eyes.”

Onyankopon gave a small, sad smile. It seemed safe to talk about them. “I have to admit,” he said slowly, “I was shocked when they pointed the barrel of that gun over their one good eye, even if it was unloaded.”

“You don’t know half the trouble Hange caused back in the Survey Corps,” Levi shook his head disapprovingly. “Always blabbing about their latest hypotheses. Putting my entire squad in danger for another titan capture mission. They’d have had their head bitten off by a titan long ago if it wasn’t for their trusty assistant, Moblit. Hell, they went days without taking a damned bath just because something more interesting caught their attention. Sometimes, when I couldn’t bear the stink, I had to knock them out and clean them myself.”

Onyankopon chuckled at his ramble. He had observed Levi and Hange’s inseparable relationship from his time at Paradis. Maybe it was because they were the last ones to survive from their generation, or maybe it extended a little deeper than that. Onyankopon was not completely sure. He gazed at the long scar across Levi’s face, crossing through his one blind eye. If Hange were there, the two of them would have made quite the one-eyed pair.

But Hange wasn’t there as they had sacrificed themself so that he and Levi could sit in peace under a blue umbrella, drinking hot beverages on a sunny day without worrying about anything else.

Levi was still rambling on, “...all those stupid naming ceremonies for the captured titans. At least three Garrison guards used to throw up after each of their experiments. The tantrums they’d throw in Erwin’s office whenever he denied their requests. That Four-eyes once talked to me about titans and their planned experiments for two days straight after we first found out about Eren’s abilities. Can you believe it? Two days!”

There was a bitter aftertaste in Levi’s mouth and he knew it had nothing to do with the tea. A memory of Hange floated in his mind, of them carefully dabbing medicated cotton over Eren’s face after he had kicked the hell out of him in the courtroom all those years ago. He remembered Hange chiding him for having gone too far and declaring that they’d never kill Eren.

His stomach twisted at the irony of how everything played out in the end.

Onyankopon’s voice stirred him out of his thoughts. “It must have been hard for them to pursue their scientific research after they became the commander.”

“It did take a huge toll on them,” Levi agreed, “Erwin’s shoes would have been hard for anyone to fill. But he himself chose them as his successor and they did their job well, even if all odds were against them.” He gave a short sigh through his nose. “But over the years, they changed too much.”

Levi had noticed all the times when Hange had faked a smile to cover up their exhaustion. They tried to maintain their cheerful façade through all the uncertainty to keep their subordinates from becoming concerned about their mental well-being, but from his time with the past two commanders, Levi knew the bone-crushing pressure they were under.

He had spotted the missing tea from his shelf during all those late nights when Hange had fallen asleep on their desk after pulling multiple all-nighters. Although they weren’t new to burning the midnight oil, the commander’s work was grueling. Adding to that, the knowledge and responsibility of dealing with an entire world full of potential enemies weighed them down incredibly. Only he knew how tired and defeated Erwin had looked during his last moments with him. In a way, the role demanded much more from Hange than it did from Erwin himself.

“You mean they were more excitable before?” Onyankopon asked, “I really did not think they could look more starry-eyed than while they were being introduced to all the new technology from Marley.” He chuckled, “The way they whooped after the success of the new improved 3DMG test session was unforgettable.”

Levi set down his empty cup. “Hange was always a vocal advocate for technological advancement. Their inventions helped to get rid of all the pure titans in the island without much loss of human life. When they were given the hope that the rest of the world was not as cruel as we thought it was- but a place where they could learn and discover- that was when I saw them truly happy for the last time. They hoped to make peace when we left off for our first Marley visit. But we both know how that ended.”

Ah, yes that Marley trip, Onyankopon thought as a tense silence settled between them, The time when everything spiraled out of control. To ease the heavy pauses, he decided to bring up some good memories from back then.

“Remember the time when Hange bought that lollipop from that clown just so that he’d stop stalking you? And the time when they tried to feed carrots to a car?”

Thankfully, it seemed to work as Levi snorted. “Shitty-Glasses was supposed to be the smartest of us all,” he said, “Yet, that was still better than the way they squealed after the camera flash the first time we took a picture in Azumabito's place. Now that was just plain embarrassing.”

Onyankopon smiled. When Levi's squad was out drinking, he had insisted Levi and Hange to take a photograph with himself and the Azumabitos as a keepsake memory of their first official trip outside Paradis. Hopes were ripe that night, with the peace conference scheduled for the next day. To keep their optimism up, they had a small dance session in which Hange had dragged Levi with them and had successfully managed two rounds around the ballroom before Levi remarked that it was ridiculous and sulked in a corner for the rest of the night with a wine glass on hand. After which Hange teased him and invited Onyankopon to give them company instead.

When the camera was ready, they were all suited up- with hats placed on their heads despite the fact that it was evening- just for the sake of the photograph session. Onyankopon knew that the Paradisians had never taken a picture before, so his eyes were on Levi and Hange instead of the camera.

Their reactions did not disappoint.

Hange squealed as the flash lit up the room and Levi flinched, grimacing at its sudden brightness. The photograph was quite comical when it was developed: Hange with their mouth slightly open, Levi with his eyes half closed and Onyankopon’s lips in an amused half-smile as he gazed at them.

“To be honest, you looked quite shaken at the flash yourself,” he pointed out to Levi.

“Yes, but I did not wake up everyone in a fifty mile radius within the building.”

“It didn’t seem to wake the kids up, though.”

“What do you expect? Not even Hange can wake up a bunch of hungover brats who had drank all night and ended up passed out on each other.”

“The three of us had to carry them back, didn’t we?”

“Only for Sasha to puke all over the new suit I wore for the photoshoot.”

Onyankopon laughed at that memory. The waiter came over with the bill and he paid it before Levi could reach for his own wallet.

“I told you before,” he said to Levi as he handed over the money, “This vacation is entirely on me.”

“Thanks,” Levi kept his wallet back inside his pocket, knowing that arguing about it would not change Onyankopon’s mind.

They sat in silence for a while, gazing at the people walking around, exploring the shops. Levi got a few quick stares now and then because of his heavily scarred face, but he did not care. He was used to people staring at him; the annoying looks of envy and awe when he was considered as humanity’s strongest soldier, glares of anger from the military higher-ups after he had brought back Armin instead of Erwin during the battle of Shiganshina, and gazes of pity after he had been severely injured due to the thunder spear, thanks to that shitty monkey.

“I wonder what happened to that photograph,” he murmured, his mind wandering back to that day in Marley.

“It was left in Paradis,” Onyankopon replied, “The militants probably disposed of it along with the rest of our belongings after we were declared traitors. It’s been three years after all.”

Levi’s heart sank. That was the last piece of Hange he had left, apart from the scars they had stitched across his face. If everything was disposed of, that would mean that the badges he had collected from the uniforms of his former comrades, his letters, Hange’s research notes, Moblit’s sketches from the night they visited a bar after work, all of their personal belongings- everything had been burnt or destroyed. Apart from Erwin’s grave, there was nothing left for him back in Paradis- the place the Survey Corps dedicated their lives and hearts for all those years.

He masked his bitterness, “It was just a piece of paper anyway.”

Onyankopon did not say anything. The cost of freedom had been incredibly heavy for both of them.

“It’s been three years, huh?”

“Yeah.”

Levi remembered that moment when the spirits of his comrades appeared in front of him as he sat battered and broken. The old Survey Corps, with whom he had spent so many years fighting, resting, experimenting and pushing through every loss, every death and every failure together. He had finally finished their job. He had taken all of their dedicated hearts with him and won for them.

His final salute both crushed his soul and set him free.

A part of him wanted to depart with them. His duty was done, Zeke was killed, the rumbling was stopped and the world was finally free of titans. What use would he be to anyone anymore?

But he knew that the others would want him to live the life that they couldn’t. To explore the world and all it had to offer. To make the dream of world-peace come true.

So, he decided that he would go on, and when his time finally comes, he would stand tall among his noble comrades and tell them stories of the world they never got to see.

Levi hesitated for a moment before turning to Onyankopon.

“Do you think they’re still watching over us?”

Onyankopon didn’t miss a beat.

“I’m sure they are.”

Gabi and Falco reappeared from the crowd, with half-eaten ice cream cones in their hands. The brats had grown so much since the first time he had seen them, all beaten up and bruised on that zeppelin three years ago. Now they looked happy and content, their eyes shining with hope, optimism and love.

Hange’s words from all those years ago played in his mind.

I want everyone to feel safe again soon. I want this to be a world where people can live without fighting each other.

There was still a long way to go for that, but with the threat of the titans gone, they only had humans to negotiate with. Though that probably did not make it any easier, peace was still an option. He’d leave that to Armin and Historia.

Erwin and Hange would have loved it here. All the new places and technology, exotic food, new discoveries; it would have blown their minds. Sometimes, he wondered what would have happened if that bastard Floch did not show up to shoot holes in that fuel tank. Hange would have been alive, they would have boarded the plane together, they could have seen the flying titan and the previous titan shifters. It might have probably returned them to their normal, curious self again.

They could have survived together.

What would Hange have done now that the titans, their life’s work, were gone forever? The two of them had never really discussed such situations, for they never imagined such a day would actually come to be. For them, a world without the threat of titans was a distant fantasy. But if Hange were alive, they’d have probably headed the peace talks. They were never the one to stay out of the action anyway.

“Sorry, we were a little late,” Falco said as he approached them, “Shall we go?”

“Sure, no problem.”

Falco popped the rest of the ice cream in his mouth before silently pulling the wheelchair by its handle without being prompted to. He was a sweet kid. Erwin, Hange and the rest of his old squad- Petra, Oulo, Eld, Gunther- would have liked him.

Levi picked up a newspaper from a vendor, to see if there were any mentions of the peace committee who had set sail for Paradis earlier that day. As they made their way through the street, he winced as the wheel stumbled over a small pothole.

“I’m so sorry,” Falco exclaimed.

“No, that’s fine,” he rubbed his back. “Times like these are when I really miss Four-eyes.”

Onyankopon laughed, “They’d have come up with a crazy convenient wheelchair, custom-made for you.”

“Knowing them, they would have probably attached an engine and the 3DMG trigger-anchor system complete with a safety belt into the wheelchair,” he shook his head. “Then again, I think they might have also pushed me down a slope as a test run, so maybe I’m safer this way.”

A distant hum of an engine made all of them look above.

A plane, similar to the one they had taken off from in Odiha, flew past the sky, its shadow falling on them as it streaked by.

For the kids, it was just another ordinary plane they stared fascinated at. But for him, something about it felt reassuring.

It was almost as if…

Levi glanced at Onyankopon, who gave him a knowing look.

So, they were watching us after all.

#levihan #levi ackerman #hange zoë #onyankopon #snk 139 #snk 132 #onyankopon and levi drink coffee and tea together in a vacation #featuring plane-san #retired levi #the sc vets were the best characters tbh #i miss them #fluff #snk fanfiction

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sepublic · 3 years

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Barrel’s Warhammer!

YYYYOOOOOO SASHA!!!!

She really is the epitome, the pinnacle, of gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss! I love Sasha, she’s such an utter mess, morally ambiguous and then downright terrible in so many ways, and genuinely unhinged in just as many! She’s a freaking riot and SUCH an amazing character, y’all!

In general, I adore how Toads are handled in this show! Yeah, they’re big and brutish and used as thugs… But the show still clearly portrays them as people, and some of them are terrible like Bog, but others are just trying to live their lives, like Percy and Braddock! And how they’re all clearly working with this ascribed role as Andrias’ enforcers and iron fist across Amphibia, how they’re encouraged to be cruel brutes… But they’re still people and they’re still oppressed, which is why Grime is leading his rebellion! Good for him, good for THEM!

Also… GRIMMITY?!?! Beatrix?! Grime LORE! I like how Beatrix and Grime have blind eyes on opposite sides, and Sasha roasting Bufo by naturally connecting his name to Buffoon, WONDERFUL! Aldo’s also a legendary, killer design, he reminds me of VLD Zarkon, old and decrepit and fanged and clearly has seen a LOT of stuff, a real warrior of his time… Honestly, getting a look into the Toads and THEIR complicated role in this story, as the ‘bad guys’ but not really, there’s more to them; It’s such a fit to Sasha’s character, and I LOVE how she’s such an utter brute for someone who normally seems accustomed to using honey over vinegar to attract flies (to feed her Toads)! She’s nuts, she’s great.

I love the explanation for the eye symbol, I love Sasha really getting to appreciate Percy and Braddock, and for a moment I thought she really was learning her lesson… When she gave them an out, I thought maybe she took what happened with Anne to heart, but now…! Maybe this is what she’s always done; Made empty promises. God, I love this little arc for her character, how she wants to be a good friend, but she keeps valuing power and control over all else…

AND HER RAGE! HER JEALOUSY! At Anne and Marcy being with each other, leaving her out, Sasha’s mind jumping to all of the worst conclusions, and how THAT anger is what unlocks her gem power, not heroism or anything else! Sasha’s such a complex and messed-up character but you can’t help but root for her, she really IS a Problematic Fave! God, with how she’s going to meet Anne in a volcano, and the whole “Sasha is Anakin and Anne is Obi-Wan” just WRITES itself, with Sasha angrily accusing Anne of turning Marcy against her, Anne retorting that Sasha did that herself, etc.!

God Sasha’s such a complicated mess and ball of unresolved emotions and contradictions, denial that’s insisting everything’s fine when it’s really not… She’s a manipulator who prefers to be hands-off, yet is also somehow the raw brute with unthinking, unyielding strength! She’s utterly terrifying, no wonder all of the Toads are in awe of her ferocity and power!

Also, I like how Barrel’s Warhammer was included; At first I wondered WHY the Narwhal Worm would guard the weapon used by the Toad who fought it, but as we can clearly see… Barrel must’ve conked it out BADLY with his Warhammer, knocking it out, and the hammer has been stuck since! And once more, the hammer has been slammed into the worm… And in general, I love seeing the Toads just ROOT around Sasha and Grime, I love seeing villainous characters get to go feral and unhinged as you root for them, as THEY rise up and fight against all odds as the underdogs!

Percy and Braddock and the gag with the kawaii poses was great, but it’s also sad to see them go! They’re definitely a wake-up call for Sasha and I like it, I wonder if you could parallel them, one-by-one, to Anne and Marcy respectively? Perhaps Anne and Marcy were initially not taken seriously by Sasha at first, but ultimately she DID grow to care for them and not just as ‘tools’, who knows? With Anne and Percy and Braddock, I think Sasha’s going to have to reconsider things… And GRIME, how he just sort of accepts that, yeah, you gotta lose people to achieve a goal! I could see him being a bad influence to Sasha, unintentionally- Like her, he means well, they’re really great parallels to one another!

Like, Sasha and Grime are both brutes, power-hungry, and wanting control, but Sasha prefers subtlety and manipulation, appeals to both her and others’ emotions, while Grime prefers to be raw and unthinking strength, he’s a seasoned veteran from combat, while Sasha is likely a rich kid, young and learning… They’re such a dynamic duo with a lot to teach one another! Maybe Grime sees himself in Sasha; Himself when HE was a kid… Maybe when he was a gladiator, he had friends but left them behind to be promoted to Captain? I wonder if Beatrix has anything to say on this, too…

Could Beatrix provide insight to Grimmity? Did Grime leave her behind in a sense…? Does SASHA have a sibling, and that leads to her weird power complex, as another parallel to Grime! Either way it’s sweet, I adore the dynamic of two horrible people who are good friends and bad, enabling influences to each other… Being problematic faves, you can’t help but cringe at their mistakes but also cheer as they win as underdogs and turn the tables on their enemies! I like how Sasha is still supportive of Grime and vice-versa, Grime’s guiding this kid, but Sasha’s fully supporting Grime as the de-facto leader and backing him up, not trying to seize control!

I think it really parallels Anne, how she just wanted to get back home… But somewhere along the way, she realizes how much she loves and enjoys this, and values her friend! And maybe it could lead to Sasha not wanting to head back home after all, especially if there’s nothing there for her; Which could play into her keeping all of her gem powers as she opposes Andrias openly, while Anne has some of her power because again, she’s more neutral, and then Marcy has none because she’s fully bought into the Newt King’s schtick!

Also, it’s funny that Sasha is no doubt feeling betrayed, like her trust has been jeopardized by Anne and Marcy, considering she did the same to Anne in Reunion! Lying to her about what she intended to do with the Frogs… It’s wonderfully hypocritical and this kid does NOT want self-awareness, she’ll toy with it for a bit, but then immediately backpedal! Get better and well Sasha, for everyone’s sake… The confrontation and paranoia as she loses her friends and only has Grime, who means well but isn’t so great himself, is also nice!

Honestly, there’s even a parallel to the idea of Sasha meaning well, only to be ruined by her own toxicity… And Grime wanting a better life for Toads in his revolution, but still allowing a hierarchy to exist by the end of the day, instead of abolishing it for all! They both have good ideas and initiative, but it’s ruined by Sasha and Grime not backing down on certain things and not listening to others, being SO sure they’re right… Very compelling stuff. Now I’m starting to wonder if Sasha will be open to Anne about her suspicions, if they WILL get along for the Third Temple…

…Or if she’ll try to manipulate and fool her again, thinking that SHE’s been betrayed herself! And maybe Sasha will realize her faults in the battle of Newtopia, only for it to be too late, Anne has been too betrayed, Sasha has only herself (and, well, Andrias) to blame! In the meantime, as Sasha no doubt embraces her role as a rebel, but also unknowingly as a hero against Andrias and his master… I can see her tapping more into her gem powers and actually using them as part of her rage, hence the shots we see from the Third Temple! She’s going to be terrifying, y’all, and even more of a match for Yunnan at this point… And Anne, poor Anne’s going to be caught between TWO toxic friends!

Both mean well, but both have other bad points… And it just means Anne’s gonna have to forge her own path, make her own decisions and group and faction, be her own person and take initiative once more! But it’s also gonna be lonely and could contribute to more trust issues along the way… And maybe she’ll think she can only trust herself, only do things on her own, and how this might pair badly with her selfless martyr-complex. We’ll have to wait and see, though… We’ll have to wait and see.

#amphibia #amphibia sasha #sasha waybright #amphibia grime #captain grime #amphibia percy #amphibia braddock #analysis #speculation

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dreamsmp-au-ideas · 3 years

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Teddy Bear Anon has purposed yet another interesting addition to the Immune AU which gives me plot ideas! In particular, a scene that would really help give past Dream a strong push into his character arc.

I like to image that immune!Dream’s character arc starts with the death of immune!Puffy. Sure, maybe he’s not sad yet, but he feels something for the woman who declared herself his pseudo mother. It’s what helps to crack the shell enough for the rest of the immune gang to start weedling their way into his heart. Immune!Dream after spending enough time watching the group he, starts to realize that yeah, connections to other people isn’t a weakness. It really is a strength. It’s something that takes time for him to come to terms with because Techno seems like a testament to the fact connections are a weakness. He was unbeatable until his horse got kidnapped. His only connection, his only weakness. But then there’s Tommy who seems to represent the complete opposite.

Where Dream represents strength from caring too little, Tommy represents strength from caring far too much. Now I’m a sucker for bamf Tommy, and I like to personally imagine that maybe the Immunes hold out for a year or two before they cave and try to make the portal. So Tommy has what really boils down to a two year training arc on top of already being a child veteran (I like to canonize SMP Earth as well because personal preference and it gives me even more room to make Tommy suffer. SMP Earth being canon? God, so much fucking trauma considering how the others treated him, a 15 year old child, like an adult.) Anyway Dream slowly realizes connections with one another are what kept the remaining Immunes alive, and he tries to force his younger self to understand that. Tries, but doesn’t really get far. Up until what everyone else calls The Fight.

Tommy’s always just kind of screwed around in fights as long as there’s only a threat to him. We know he has a tendency to throw if MCC is any indicator. But then they time travel and maybe they spend some time in the past trying to get the situation sorted and the past’s Dream maybe just kinda does something to Tubbo. Doesn’t even have to be big, it just needs to clock as a threat to Immune!Tommy who’s already lost his Tubbo and refuses to let his younger self go through that. So Tommy goes completely ape shit on the younger Dream. Sure, it’s only been two years for this Tommy. He’s probably, like, 18 or 19 at most. Still a child as far as a lot of people are concerned. He shouldn’t be stronger than Dream or Technoblade, and in the few cross group sparing sessions they’ve had he isn’t. He’s stronger than his younger self but no where near these two demi gods of combat. But then Dream suddenly registers as a threat to Tubbo in Immune!Tommy’s eyes and he makes the mistake of mocking Tommy while he’s at it. He knows that immune!Tommy lost his Tubbo and maybe the past Dream is lashing out slightly or trying to get some kind of foothold in Tommy’s psyche. He isn’t doing anything near what immune!Dream has done, but it’s enough to piss Tommy off. So immune!Tommy challenges Dream to a fight and Dream immediately realizes the mistake he’s made when Tommy starts to destroy him.

Say even Techno’s there for some reason or another and he realizes what’s going down so he tries to calm Tommy down, joining the fight just as Dream is loosing it. The situation quickly turns into the first time Techno’s ever gotten his ass thoroughly kicked by Tommy, leaving everyone spectating baffled (Tommy’s younger self partly included). They’re certain this kid is going on some rampage and none of them can stop him but the moment Dream and Techno are both taken care of (wounded, not killed, the older Tommy is always careful about that. He even throws a splash healing on them with some indifferent kind of disgust that hides the fact he does still care to some extent even hurting as he is.) Tommy immediately just switches focus to outright doting on Tubbo, ignoring any muttered Clingyinnits in favor of ensuring Tubbo is fine. Tubbo is completely find and just as confused, but the point stands and neither Tommy ends up leaving Tubbo’s side for the rest of the day. The younger Tommy, after all, is the only one the older Tommy’s told the full story to regarding the future (even when he couldn’t trust his own family he was always able to trust himself with the secrets that mattered, so he prepares his younger self in case the worst comes to pass.)

The older Dream, immune!Dream, he doesn’t get involved. He sit on the side lines and just kinda laughs, the sound drowned out by Sapnap’s loud encouragements and Sam’s half hearted attempts to get Tommy to stop (he could have stopped Tommy immediately if he’d stepped in. Sam is after all the only person on earth Tommy listens to without hesitation, but Sam lets it happen and pretends he tried.)

Immune!Dream just kinda smirks at his younger self later that night and mentions something about attachments really making you weak. After all, it’s not like the only time Tommy takes a battle seriously is when someone he cares about is in danger. It’s not like Tommy would turn the world into a seared ball for Tubbo, and Tubbo would do the same in return. It’s not like they’ve watched the people they care about temporarily rebuke the Crimson just to give the Immunes those precious extra seconds needed to survive in a fight. Attachments, they’re just a weakness.

The younger Dream doesn’t know how to respond to that. It’s the first time he thinks about his older self maybe being right.

Before I go I wanna leave you with two more ideas for the Immune AU

First up, Wilbur is eight years older than Tommy give or take. Wilbur had Fundy when he was around 16 and Tommy was around 8. Tommy was the best damn uncle he could be and for a while Tommy and Fundy were really stupidly close. They were both apart of the raised by Wilbur club and Wilbur was trying his damn best. Fundy aged/matured (physically and mentally) faster than a regular person for a while. They believed it was because he was a fox hybrid and Wilbur was ready to lose Fundy too soon. When Fundy was equivalent to 18 in human years though his aging process suddenly slowed to a crawl and his tail split into two, at which point the group realized he was actually a kitsune and it was just those first 8 years that passed by quickly (and Wilbur had a lot of questions for the now missing Sally who he’d thought was a salmon hybrid, genuinely, but became exceedingly less sure.) His family knows he’s a kitsune, but Fundy hid it from most of the rest of the server. A good thing considering later events.

Fundy was part of the Immune group for a while and I like to imagine that he and Tommy had a falling out during the Pogtopia era but after the egg started to take over they started bonding again and acting like, well, family. Unfortunately when it came time for them to activate the portal, Fundy ended up getting separated from the group and getting caught. The eggpire didn’t actually know Fundy was fully immune or a kitsune so he just kinda pretended to get infected, using his illusions to make his fur look crimson. I personally like the idea that Fundy at some point managed to get back to the time machine and being a little code wizard manages to get the thing working and yeets himself in. He shows up a little late but after fixing his appearance manages to catch up with the rest of the group.

Fundy is underrated. Tommy being a good uncle is underrated. Sam would absolutely adopt the traumatized fox baby in Eret’s honor. What’s not to love?

The last concept I wanna bring up that I really like is hybrid Tommy. Tanuki would be good since it’s another reason for the Sam Nook bit. Maybe Sam specifically picked Sam Nook since Tom Nook was Tommy’s favorite character on the grounds he was the only representation Tommy had ever gotten and it made the kiddo happy. However, I also personally really like phoenix Tommy and it would make an interesting plot point. Tommy accidentally losing his third life at some point and realizing he’s an immortal creature of fire would have led to him taking a protector role for his new family. He can’t die, but he can burn anything around him, why not send him out to get supplies when the worst the eggpire could do would be capture him. Even then he just literally cannot hear the egg. Which could lead to both some interesting comedic moments and some really good angst if Sam agonizes over his desire to protect Tommy and let him be a child suddenly being at odds with the fact Tommy is literally the best person for the job so to speak. Not to mention Sapnap, who I headcanon as a Blaze hybrid, would be even more attached the moment he found a new fire proof friend to burn forests with him. Regardless of which hybrid type he is, I could see him hiding it from everyone except for Fundy when he was a child and only ever admitting it later to the other Immunes once they become a found family.

Personally I like the idea of Tommy being part tanuki hybrid and part phoenix hybrid, but is that too mary sue? Is it just a little bit too cheesy to have him be both? I will never not try to incorporate phoenix Tommy into my fics but also tanuki Tommy would be such a mood for this au.

Like image Tommy just builds a den that’s in reality a vault/panic room a la Techno and he hides it under Church Prime since that is The Safe Spot in Tommy’s mind.

~Snapdragon & Firefly

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friendofhayley · 3 years

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I’m back after my hiatus from fanfiction, to give y’all the best multifandom recs of the fics I read this month. Shoutout to all content creators who helped us live to see the close of this year. This fic includes 15 fics for Sterek, Larry, Winteriron, and Geraskier. The starred ones put me through heaven and hell *chef’s kiss*.

Sterek (Teen Wolf)

1. Six Letter Word for Romance by @troubleiwant | domestic kink - omg there’s only one bed - soft Derek - oblivious idiots in love - 6k

Stiles definitely starts off thinking it’s fucking hilarious that Derek-sourwolf-Hale does crosswords and cares about scuffs on his furniture.

But at a certain point, and he can’t pinpoint exactly when, “fully functional adult couple” somehow becomes a massive fetish of his. Derek in sweats and bare feet, nudging his glasses up his nose while he does the Sunday crossword? Unff. Derek filling out forms to get some renovations on his property approved? Oh God, yes. Derek putting away groceries and bitching that the corner store was out of the right type of Greek yogurt? Take me now, Stiles thinks, worrying at his lower lip with his teeth.

This can’t be normal.

2. *Dirty Little Secret* by @isthatbloodonhisshirt | Cora & Stiles bffs - no one can resist the Stilinski charm - celebrity Derek - human au - 91k

“Holy shit, this is a date!” he blurted out, turning back to Derek wide-eyed. “This is a date! You intended for this to be a date, this was supposed to be a date!” He figured if he said it enough times, maybe he would believe it, but so far, no dice.

Derek was scowling again—seriously, did he want wrinkles?—but he just reached into one of the bags and pulled out a burger, checking what was written on the foil in sharpie before handing it over to Stiles.

“Of course it’s a date, what did you think this was?”

3. Can You Feel A Whole New Part of Your World? by @isthatbloodonhisshirt | i genuinely don’t look at authors names i just click i am sorry for spamming you but you write too good - neighbors Sterek - emotionally mature Stiles - the ideal fluffy world you’d want to live in - 53k

Can you hear me singing in the shower?” Stiles blurted out, because he had to know, now. If one of his neighbours had slid that note under his door, then it meant Parrish as another neighbour could hear him, too! He had to know if this was all a huge joke and one person had walked by and overheard him and decided to fuck with him.

Parrish gave him a weird look at the question, but answered anyway, making Stiles’ plans to leave the country speed up in his mind.

“Of course I can. You’re actually not bad. Though you have been singing a lot of Frozen lately, getting kind of tired of the soundtrack.”

4. Theory of Overprotective Canines by @petals42 | derek can turn into wolf - oblivious Stiles - future fic - mutual pining - 11k

Stiles is totally looking forward to living alone in his super cool apartment off-campus. He is. He is also very excited to bike to school every day, ready to set up an awesome game room, and definitely over his crush on Derek Hale. Completely over it.

Or at least he is until Derek decides he's moving in with him. And then turns out to be the perfect roommate. And then starts attending all his classes. As a wolf.

This is not going according to plan.

Larry (One Direction)

5. **The Changer and the Changed** by @homosociallyyours | literally the best fic of all time i want to live in there - girl direction - NYC ‘70s au - trans Zayn - the girls are so lovely - 59k

It’s the spring of 1977 and Harry Styles has just moved to New York City after graduating college. She knows she’s a lesbian. She just needs to figure out how to meet other lesbians.

Louis Tomlinson works at a popular women’s bookstore in the Lower East Side, Womon’s Direction, where she spends her days reading feminist literature, writing poetry, exchanging friendly barbs with her boss Niall, and dreaming of finding someone to love.

When Harry and Louis meet, their connection is instantaneous. Slowly but surely, Louis welcomes Harry into her community of women. Stonewall veteran and old school butch Niall; Liam, a land dyke who’s moved to the city for love; and Zayn, a lesbian musician who’s been ostracized by a vocal part of women’s community for being trans, welcome Harry with open arms, ready to help her find her place in New York City’s bustling lesbian scene.

6. others i’ve seen might never be mean (but they would never do) by @cherrylouvol6 | aaaaaaaa it’s lesbian When Harry Met Sally !!! - rom com - girl direction - coming out and first times - really great sex - 20k

Louis sighs.

“Do you remember what I said to you the first time we met?”

“That I’m naive and neurotic and would be hard pressed to ever find someone who could put up with me?” Harry snaps.

7. some things fade (some never do) by @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed | aaaaaa this story took me apart and back together again just like Louis and Harry - urban fantasy au - second chances - exes to friends to lovers - hurt/comfort - 25k

Matching tattoos. He’d never thought he’d be the type for tattoos to begin with, let alone matching or magical ones, but once Harry had put the idea in his mind it had never quite managed to disappear. And it had made sense. With their relationship a long distance one, this was simply another way of feeling close to one another. Of knowing where the other was, how they felt. It had made so much sense.

Back then.

8. we can take the long way home by @eleadore | i usually don’t rec my porn but there’s so much feels in this one - canon-divergent - kink discovery - friends to lovers - this was written in 2015 as a future fic but it felt like it was taking place now so good job - 27k

“Fertile,” Louis says, and then laughs because it sounds stupid to say out loud. He hasn’t ever really thought of himself in those terms. Baby-making terms. It’s just one of those things his body can do, like exercise, or go without tea. Doesn’t mean he will.

Winteriron (MCU)

9. **Dig No Graves** by @missaphelion | Tony finds out about his parents right after winter soldier au - Tony Stark has a heart - Bucky heals with bots and lots of sugar - slow burn - 142k

"I'm here to kill you, Terminator," Tony said slowly, "does that compute?"

The soldier looked up at him with wide blue eyes and no expression. "Okay."

Tony froze. "Okay," he echoed. "I tell you I came here to kill you and your response is 'okay'?"

10. A Rifling Matter by Penndragon27 | Winter Soldier has such a big crush on Tony’s weapons, he escapes Hydra au - identity porn - pining Bucky - fluff and angst - Winter Soldier is a fanboy and it’s cute - 37k

All the Asset knows is fighting, killing.

He also knows a good weapon when he sees one and Stark Industries... they make some great weapons.

11. *Winter is Coming (aka Fifty First Avengers Dates)* by @tisfan & @everyworldneedslove | enemies to friends to lovers to 50 first dates - pining Bucky - Tony gets amnesia - no Steve bashing but he’s a little bit of an ass - mental health issues - 109k

Bucky Barnes is still mostly The Asset, and he's pretty sure Hydra is going to come back for him soon, so in the meantime he's just going to keep an eye on the Avengers for them. But then Clint spotted him hiding in the shadows, so Tony came out and dragged Bucky back to the Tower, threw him in the shower, and fed him cheeseburgers.

Now The Asset is having anomalous feelings. In his pants.

Geraskier (The Witcher)

12. *no reason to run* by @yoursummerfrost | different meeting au - only one bed but camping - cursed Jaskier - soft Geralt!!!! - poly negotiations - 61k

"You'll change your mind one day," says the innkeep. "The road can't love you back."

What a strange way to flatten something so beautiful, Jaskier thinks. What a small way to love.

13. *He Fell into a Faerie Ring* by @geraltnoises | Jaskier gets bardnapped after the fight au - non-human Jaskier - soft Geralt - Jaskier encourages people to be kind and becomes a god - emotionally mature Geralt - 57k

Traders are a gossiping sort. If there was a scandal within the noble houses of Posada, you’d hear about it in Cretegor by the end of the week. So, the quick spread of a rumor about a little village in the Kestrel Mountain range was not at all surprising. What was surprising was the story that the traders wove. They said that Luibhtorrach, a sad, ghost of a farming town, had miraculously become a hub for trade, as if overnight. Their lands unbelievably fertile and brimming with crop. Even stranger, each and every one of Luibhtorrach’s people professed that their good fortune was the work of a mysterious beast they’d claimed as their personal deity. Most recent news foretold of their plans to throw a midsummer festival celebrating this newfound god. In preparation, silken blue banners were erected in every corner of the town, each bearing the symbol of their new patron: A delicate dandelion wrapping around a golden sun.

14. Barking Up the Wrong Tree by KHansen | 5+1 things - I’m worried about Geralt’s skills - non-human Jaskier - monsterfucker Geralt - crack treated seriously - 11k

Geralt is 100% certain that Jaskier is a vampire.

He's 100% proven wrong.

15. Bardic Idyll by Lisztful | fake relationship - Geralt is soft and oblivious - pining - fluff and angst - Jaskier you can’t show your emotions mainly through song! - 13k

Jaskier is certain he can win the Continent's annual bardic competition, but he needs to be accompanied by a dashing romantic companion in order to enter. Enter Geralt, who is definitely, for sure, only interested in the free food, and not at all in staring lovingly into Jaskier's eyes.

#monthly fic rec #fic rec #sterek fic rec #larry fic rec #winteriron #geraskier #larrie hijinks #witcher #mcu

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daily-dose-of-imagines · 4 years

Note

Hi! Could you please write hcs on yakuza Johnny, Gyro, Diego, and Giorno’s ‘weak spots’? Like things their S/O can do that would make them melt? Hopefully I’m not bugging you, haha

Hello anon~! Of course I can~! hehe I hope you enjoy these hcs~! And sweet pea, you’re not bugging me at all~! I’m just ecstatic that so many people enjoy this AU~! ;; <3

Now, since this one doesn’t have a specified reader type, I’ll go ahead and work with a Underling!Reader ~!

» » Admin Ko

ᴍᴇʟᴛɪɴɢ ᴀ ꜰᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ʟᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ | ᴊᴏʜɴɴʏ ; ɢʏʀᴏ ; ᴅɪᴇɢᴏ ; ɢɪᴏʀɴᴏ | [𝕁𝕁𝔹𝔸] Yakuza!AU | Head Canons

ᴊᴏʜɴɴʏ ᴊᴏᴇꜱᴛᴀʀ

First and foremost, some background with this relationship. Johnny never anticipated to feel the way he does for another person, more or less an underling of all people. Though he has his distrust for all their underlings, he keeps a majority of those opinions to himself-- rather he tries to.

However, his world is thrown for a loop when he meets her. Despite being an underling, her absolute drive and motivation to accomplish her duties was something he couldn’t really keep his eyes off of. Eventually, they end up together. Johnny becoming a smidgen more interested in the work all the underlings do to help keep the business afloat.

He won’t lie when he’s playing favorites, he’ll be distinctively clear on that. Those who work hard and have strong loyalties to the Joestar family are the ones he has a... in a sense, kinder eye to.

With time, he ends up going on more missions with her; to observe or to mock no one would ever really know, but least to say the pair grew quite close in that aspect; and no matter how much coaxing he tried, he couldn’t get her to budge from the position she choose for herself.

Now then, our reader has had an ample amount of time to observe and understand the little ticks of Johnny, and even more so once they’re officially together. It’s easy to say that within Johnny’s faction, if he happens to have a large amount of pent up rage, she’s the first to be called to settle him down.

First it’s her soft voice luring him back into the world, and then it’s her soft touch against his palm, her fingers tracing simple yet meaningful words into his palm while she counts down. That’s one of the few things that she does to calm him down.

The other is during their more private moments, when it’s just the two of them. Being on his lap helps soothes his more humane thoughts of losing her, and the sweet and simple kisses are what truly melt him.

He absolutely will without a doubt become putty in her hands after 2-3 solid sweet kisses. Though the key to this is eye contact and reassuring smiles.

Though it is harder to bring him down to the ground once his emotions flip to his more...sporadic emotions, it’s the same nonetheless, except a much more blunt way of handling things. A strong yank down and a firm kiss is all it really takes to melt him back into her hands, and she’s learned to keep him in place until he melts.

ɢʏʀᴏ ᴢᴇᴘᴘᴇʟɪ

For Gyro, he isn’t opposed to the relationship. Rather he welcomes it with open arms! Their meeting is purely coincidental. During one of Gyro’s mock experiments with a live subject, she had waltzed in with a couple of heavy injuries.

Thankfully they weren’t fatal, but she was pretty certain the blood loss aided in getting her through the ordeal of having to stare at a screaming person whilst the mad doctor treated her wounds; and because of that he ticks her off in his mental box as someone of interest.

As time passes and her visits frequent, with each visit getting much more bizarre every time, the closer the pair become. He questions her, probes her, and dissects every word she utters for a better understanding as to why she acts and responds the way she does around him, and to say the least he becomes absolutely starstruck when he realizes that she doesn’t mind his grotesque work, and is actually interested in his research aspect.

Thus, they spend more time in his office reviewing over his old files as he understands the operating room isn’t for everyone, and that’s when he realizes that even the mad doctor himself has some weak and soft spots.

It starts off as a simple brush against his ear. The way her fingers delicately brush his hair out of his face and the affectionate eyes she held towards him.

The next is when he allows her to play and brush his hair. It’s almost comical how it comes about, but in the end he naturally becomes putty in her hands when he’s seated before her and her fingers begin to work their magic on his hair.

But if there is one thing that will always be considered as his most prized and valuable possession, it would be a small spherical orb. It’s unique shape and functions amusing him as she gifted him the little trinket; and let it be known that whoever touches it besides him or her, they would never see the light of day or another human being ever again.

ᴅɪᴇɢᴏ ʙʀᴀɴᴅᴏ

Cunning to a fault, Diego has no qualms intermingling with his underlings within his faction. Rather he relishes in the fact that he can blend in with their crowds with ease.

That’s exactly how he met her. A sort of routine clean-up and check-up that he planned in his mind as he evaluated each of his underlings. Who would fail and who would pass? It was a game he enjoyed in his past time, and the looks of horror he sees when they realize it’s him is what brings him the most joy. The moment when their minds are in a frazzled and weak state.

Yet with her he didn’t exactly see that. Yes, he had managed to surprise her with his sudden appearance, but unlike most it took a second longer for him to pry into her mind; unlike the rest of the underlings he had managed to check off. Thus, she ended up being promoted to a higher ranking underling.

Eventually, he finds himself frequently checking up on her. His reports stacking up as his observations become almost obsessive with her, and he’s absolutely shocked when she confronts him about it. It brings a coy smirk to his face knowing that he has such a valuable asset in his arsenal.

With time, he comes to terms with his emotions and realizes that he has fallen in love with his subordinate, and her with his strange yet endearing self.

The way Diego falls and melts is...in a sense peculiar. It’s rather comical in one sense, and very sad in another as his upbringing is shone more in the light. He adores affection, despite the front he puts up against it, he absolutely loves it.

The moments that melt him the most is when he’s curled up next to her watching a documentary on dinosaurs. His arms wrapped loosely around her waist and his head laying on her shoulder will always bring him at ease, and her gentle hands against his back always help in bringing him down from a stressful day.

As for any sudden weaknesses or melting points, it would be the nape of his neck. A quick kiss or teasing blow of air will have him struggling and stumbling over himself. Make no mistake, if she does this in a public area, he won’t hesitate to ravage her right then and there.

ɢɪᴏʀɴᴏ ɢɪᴏᴠᴀɴɴᴀ

Due to his upbringing, Giorno is a man of secrets and respect. Unlike the eldest Dio, he’s much more compassionate to his underlings like Jonathon and in a sense, Diego. He’s patient and loves to hear of what goes on in his subordinate’s minds.

Be it for the greater good or the worst he finds the information valuable and handy in any sort of situation that may arise in the future. He meets her on a whim, it’s during her rookie training and hazing when he faces her, and is quite impressed to say the least when she holds her own rather well against the veteran underlings.

He ends up frequently checking up on her, having her stop by to provide her reports in person as well as telling him of any troubles within the lower ranks of his faction. Though to his absolute surprise-- one of the few times he can be caught off guard-- she’s not someone who came for the Joestar family, but the new Passione gang.

To say the least he’s smitten right then and there. After all, Passione was his own work, his own undoing and rebuilding. None of his siblings had really stepped foot into helping him and it proved to be one of his greater accomplishments.

Eventually, he finds himself aching for her daily talks, and finds himself smiling every so often after she leaves. He’s told by Bruno, and he too can agree it’s an odd soft spot he’s grown.

Though once together, the little ticks and habits Giorno has is exploited fully by her. She doesn’t hesitate to put him in his place and will help in any way she can to calm him down if he’s enraged, but god help her if he ever is enraged.

The one thing that will absolutely melt Giorno’s facade is in the little moments in their shared room. If he’s laying on his stomach topless, she’ll paint beautiful pictures or words with watercolor. The intimate moment is something Giorno always looks forward to no matter the skill level of his significant other as the ministrations and her humming will always bring him into a new plane of existence.

A surprising way to bring him down or to exploit his weakness, is by tugging his hair down/up to eye level roughly it brings him pain, but also an awakening to what he’s been doing and how he should actually be handling a situation.

#jjba x reader #jjba headcanons #yakuza au #au #johnny joestar x reader #johnny joestar #gyro zeppeli x reader #gyro x reader #gyro zeppeli #diego brando x reader #diego brando #diego x reader #giorno giovanna x reader #giorno x reader #giorno giovanna

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my-writings-and-musings · 3 years

Text

Here's a commission from an absolutely wonderful person, with Drift and a human reader going from the start of their friendship to becoming Amica Endura, and being ridiculously cute and sweet all the way.

You'd been confused by the term at first, like you had with all Cybertronian phrases upon initially hearing them, but this one had been different in a way that didn't feel right.

Mostly because it sounded suspiciously like an insult.

Though the group of bots hadn't appeared to be especially troublesome, you had still seen Drift flinch when they'd referred to him as a Carnicon. That reaction alone had stirred immediate concern on your part, but their less than friendly tone and the sense of trouble they carried had made you act on the spot. Though the offending crewmembers had been gone by the time you managed to climb down the ladder attached to your designated lunch table, you'd still made it a point to hurry across the floor towards the lonely ninja bot, hoping that perhaps you'd just misunderstood what had transpired. Maybe the word was a nickname he hadn't heard in a while? Distracted as you were just trying to avoid getting stepped on by the other bots moving about the room, such optimism was still obviously hopeless even to you. Drift had looked wounded by the comment.

"Hey, Drift! Down here, hello!"

Waving your arms for added effect, you called up to the bot as soon as you reached the floor beside his chair. Though somewhat out of breath, you had practiced getting the attention of much taller beings enough times to make elevating your voice quite easy, and you were noticed quickly. Raising his helm in a flash, Drift looked down to the floor with surprise that turned to a soft smile when he recognized you. A hand was offered to lift you as had become customary amongst the crew.

"Hey, Y/N! Finish your lunch so soon?" He asked casually, all traces of his unpleasant encounter already wiped from his face. Hopping off his palm and onto the table, you had to sadly note the half eaten meal of his own sitting on a tray, untouched since he'd been called that word. The neatly organised arrangement of energon cuts and various metals prepared as tasty little morsels was his usual lunch, something you knew because its sushi like appearance had stuck in your mind, especially do to how quickly he always finished it and the delighted mood with which he did so. Something must have indeed been wrong for it to be pushed aside and ignored.

"Yeah! I just wanted to come over, and..." Words failed you at the realization you hadn't actually planned upon what to say, or even how to go about saying it, despite your desire to help. All you'd wanted was to check up on him as swiftly as possible, and due to the distance involved there hadn't been time to think of a tactful way to accomplish that. Perhaps you should just be honest and not beat around the bush? Drift was a bot who could appreciate good intentions, if nothing else. Finding your courage, you ignored your somewhat rapid heartbeat to look up at him, smiling softly and adjusting your stance in a way you prayed came across as reassurance. "Well, honestly, I saw that group of bots go by and... I don't like to assume, but I wanted to make sure they didn't give you a hard time."

"Oh, those guys?"

His tone was casual, but even he couldn't hide the hurt that flashed in his optics. Clearly, and unfortunately, your instincts had been right on target.

"Nah, they're just... Some mechs are a bit abrasive is all, it's how they socialize." He said, politely dismissing your concerns with fake sincerity that might have worked if you didn't know him as well as you did. Though not especially close, you'd spent enough time with him to learn he tried to play peacemaker on the ship, something made quite difficult by the past many crewmembers refused to let him forget. Somehow the particular variety of pain he earned from such a predicament was very easy to recognize. You could hear it in every halting word, and because of that you had to fight to keep your expression neutral as he worked his way through an explanation probably improvised on the spot. "I've been developing a more open energy flow in casual environments. It allows me to connect with others on a deeper level, but can make me a tad more... vulnerable, to such unexpected encounters."

Hearing the pain hidden just below the surface of his voice, you can't help but feel a protective stir in your heart, regardless of the fact Drift towers over you and is an experienced combat veteran. Size and strength clearly aren't keeping him safe from bullies, and you can't bear to think of him suffering that pain in silence. Perhaps it isn't your place, but leaving him to endure even another minute just isn't an option. Sitting down on the table, you keep your worry to yourself and speak plainly, one equal to another. "It wasn't so much them, as what they said that seemed to bother you."

Seeing him deflate a bit makes further conversation almost impossible, but you push forward with your question. "That word, Carnicon, was it an insult?"

"No." He replies, curtly but not aggressive as he looks down at the hands he's folded atop the table. Worried you might have crossed some cultural boundary, despite all but whispering the word in question to lessen its blow, you're relieved when he seems to decide against further deflection. Stroking his thumb over the back of his palm, he is open but not quite unguarded in his tone as he starts to explain. "Well, not in most situations. Carnicon is an older term for Cybertronians built to hunt or engage in combat with purely biological weapons; like claws or venom."

Now at least marginally caught up, though still uncertain how such a word could ever be used against someone, you gently encouraged him to continue when he paused. "But... in other situations?"

"Some look down on bots bearing features that are ascribed to Carnicons. Thus, the name is often levied at those with "beastly" attributes, such as tails, horns, or..." Momentarily worried he'd paused because the topic had indeed proved too much, you were too caught up in the sad implications of the explanation to notice it hardly applied to him in the slightest. It was only when he brought a hand to his chin that the pieces started to click. Tilting his helm, he opened his mouth just enough for you to catch sight of four incredibly pointed tips, all in the same spots as your own canines. Everything made a terribly sad kind of sense by the time he closed his mouth and returned his sad gaze to you with a single word.

"Fangs."

Heartache barreled past your defenses to show on your face in the form of an unrestrained frown, one that almost weighed you down under a dense kind of sadness you'd never experienced. Bots kept surprising you with the downright absurd forms of bigotry found on Cybertron, but this... You didn't even know how to begin processing it. This poor bot may have made some bad choices in the past, but he's worked tirelessly to be better, and the whole time you've known him he's been nothing but kind. More than kind, in fact. Drift is practically smiling every time he sees you. To think he has to endure exclusion for his past, on top of harassment for a physical trait that's impossibly harmless, you find yourself wishing wistfully you were large enough to embrace him. A reassuring smile on his face makes you ache more.

"Although I'm not a Carnicon, the fact that a number of my dentae are unusually sharp in a manner some might compare to those commonly found in Carnicons has occasionally resulted in... heckling." At the last word he cracks, and for the first time his fake unaffected front is completely ineffective, allowing you to see the pain that's almost overflowing just below the surface. Such a sight makes you certain you'll never be able to unsee his suffering again. Suddenly you understand him on a deeper level, as if this little incident has made something click into perfect place. You've never felt more determined to comfort someone than you do as he tries to continue. "But I'm quite accustomed to all of the reactions I provoke, Y/N! It does not bother me. Thank you for your concern though, I hope this feature does not perturb you."

A wonderful burst of clarity nearly makes you laugh, if only because being so caught up actually made you forget something about yourself, but you channel that energy into a bolstering smile as you scoot closer on the table.

"Why would it do that? I've got them too."

Optics going blank, it looked as if his processor had crashed like an old PC before he utters two quiet words.

"Come again?"

Tilting your own head, you gently pull your mouth open and push your lip back to reveal your own canines, all of which extend far enough that all he has to do is squint before his expression brightens in realization. Tapping the pointy tip, you let go to enable yourself to talk once again. Seeing him watch your face a little more intently as you speak is oddly endearing. "See? All humans have these teeth, they're called "canines", but mine are extra big and sharp. It's called Macrodontia."

"I... I never noticed..." He replied after a pause, speaking softly as his processor works over what you've just shared with him. There's hesitation holding back an obvious buzz of excitement, as if he doesn't want to take a risk and believe he's finally found someone who understands, or is worried you might be offput by the true level of his excitement. Equally concerned about not overwhelming him or overstepping, you reply using a casual tone to mask your eagerness to connect with him.

"As small as I am, no one here has." You say matter of factly, briefly wondering if any unpleasant sentiment would have been directed your way if your size didn't hide the feature. Flashbacks of taunts on Earth are overwritten by self admonishment, as you know for a fact nothing you've endured could ever compare to what he faces on a daily basis in terms of sheer isolation. No doubt the teeth also play into bot's assumptions on his "aggressive" nature too. Not wanting to make the moment about yourself, but also determined to let him know you would never do to him what others have done to you, you're left fumbling between what feels like two conflicting ideals. "Sometimes people made fun of me for it on Earth, so I... I know it's not the same as what you face, so I don't want to say I "understand" how you feel or anything, but-"

"Y/N... I think you do. A lot more than most." He says, not so much interrupting as reassuring you that the backpedaling isn't necessary. Letting out a breath you didn't know you'd been holding, the warm satisfaction of being able to help someone in a trying moment settled over your heart with a kind of fuzzy giddiness. There's a renewed brightness in his optics as he looks to you without shame and speaks openly. "Thank you for sharing this with me, and I assure you I won't tell a soul. But if anyone ever does find out, and gives you trouble..."

There's a gentle fade to silence as you lay a tiny hand on his.

"It doesn't have to be secret. I'm not ashamed of the way I am, especially considering who I share the look with." You say, and the effect is so profound his smile actually appears to brighten before the rest of his expression.

"I'll still be here for you, just as you've been here for me."

"Consider the feeling mutual."

---------------------------------

"Then there's this particular blade; do you see how it doesn't have any sharpened edge?"

Due to your size, you could probably see the finer details of the weapon even more clearly than your friend did, and thus the total lack of serrated sides was quite apparent. Thankfully the missing edge also made it easier to observe the features Drift was describing while he held the blade out for you to see, as you could get quite close without having to worry about excessive caution. It didn't hurt that you also wanted to observe as much detail as possible. Following along with him had taught you amazing things, and he actually seemed to grow more enthusiastic when you were attentive.

"Yeah! It's all just tapered to a point, like a stake." You said, sitting casually on the floor amongst the neatly arranged armory of swords and daggers of incredible variety. From the way Drift is gleefully chatting from his own spot in front of you, one might have thought he was discussing something more akin to collectibles than weapons of war, but this behavior had become so normal to you that the oddness didn't even register. As far as you were concerned, he was simply a friend sharing something he was passionate about. Seeing him smile so brightly made it even better.

"Precisely! This style is very unique; it's meant for close combat, either as a last resort in a sword fight or a single strike for assassination." He said, holding up the blade and flipping it elegantly over his palm. Optics almost shining with delight, he spoke so enthusiastically you could see his sharpened dentae peeking through every smile, which he only allowed to happen when he felt truly comfortable. Before you knew it your own cheeks were pushing up in an absolutely beaming grin, one enthusiastic enough to show your own little fangs as well. Seeing Drift this... free just stirred a kind of warm happiness in your heart you didn't know was possible. It seemed to only happen in select moments, but it was definitely becoming more frequent the longer you two were friends, and it was hard to miss how his happiest days seemed to occur only in your presence...

"Oh, and then there's this one!"

You startled as he pulled out a similiar but far more elegant blade seemingly from nowhere, moving so swiftly the fine edge made a whistle as it cut through the very air, but as he began to gush about the particular nature of this weapon you settled back in to listen eagerly. Truthfully you could sit here and let him talk through every weapon he'd ever owned. Being his friend was a reward in itself that you enjoyed each day.

---------------------------------

For the sake of the bot working so diligently, you tried to avoid moving in any significant way, going so far as to take shallow breaths whenever possible. It was resulting in rather minimal oxygen intake, but you saw it as worth it due to how little you disturbed his concentration. Unfortunately your metabolism really didn't approve of the sacrifice.

Thankfully, Drift had become familiar enough with human biology and you in general to notice just as you were starting to get dizzy.

"Y/N?" He prompted, getting you to crack your eyes open just a notch to look at him. Still unwilling to risk his work, you willed up the tiniest hint of air through your throat to respond without moving your mouth.

"Mm?"

A blurry smile came through your narrowly parted eyelids, his sense of reasurance shining bright despite the limited view you had as he spoke softly. "You can relax, I can do this fine with you moving a little."

Opening your eyes all the way, the words admittedly acted as a switch for your lungs, which sucked in a deep breath through your nose to catch up with your deficit. Relieved and feeling a little silly, you took a few more quick inhales as he paused his painting of your face. Apparently you'd been much closer to passing out than you'd realized... When dizziness finally faded away, you looked back to him with a sheepish smile and a permissive look for him to continue. Drift smiled right back and lifted the tiny brush again with another little reminder.

"But even if I were having a problem, you staying conscious is more important than not smudging paint."

"Sorry, just don't want to mess up your hard work." You replied, now content to breathe normally but still doing your best to stay motionless atop his desk. The sentiment seemed to touch him, as there was a hint of a delay in his next brushstroke, but a little merry flash in his optics. Being appreciated in anything was still quite new for him, after all. Even with you his list of true friends remained sadly short.

"Painting these symbols is just as much about the process as the result. Taking the time to get it right, even fixing little details, is all part of it." He murmured as the tiniest touch of a miniscule brush flicked under your right eye, his voice expressing his focus until he pulled back and relaxed with a quip. "Plus, you're actually doing better than I'm used to. Rodimus is always so twitchy when we try this."

A tiny snort of laughter escaped you at the image of a frustrated Lost Light captain getting antsy in a chair. "I can believe it."

There was an unusually long pause as Drift seemed to survey his work, mouth pressing into a thin line before he held up a bot sized mirror and looked at you with an expression just barely restraining hope for approval.

"Here, want to see so far?"

There was no need to exaggerate; you loved it. A part of you wished the intricate red could be permanent due to how beautiful it looked on your features, especially with how perfect the symbols were at accentuating what you liked most about your appearance. Tilting your head from side to side, you admired the expert craftsmanship with a smile impossible to hide, and were emphatic in expressing your thoughts.

"Drift, it looks amazing!"

"I'm glad..." He said on a sigh of relief, backtracking under the guise of a fake cough moments later. "I'm glad you like it! These patterns and colors are a very pure expression of friendship, so getting them right is... Yeah."

Seeing him so vulnerable pulled out the same desire to comfort him that had started your relationship, though unlike then you were totally certain now as you laid a proportionally tiny hand on his. "Marks or no marks, you're still my best friend."

Despite how casual the words left your lips, he looked just as touched as he'd been at your initial interaction in the canteen, and seemed quite affected as he lowered the mirror and replied. "You mean it?"

"Always." Came your automatic response.

---------------------------------

The Lost Light, being as massive as it was, had a wealth of rooms including viewing decks up for grabs at any given time. With one wall consisting almost entirely of windows to view the beauty of the cosmos, and plenty of space to set up furniture or whatever else one might need, they were a naturally popular choice for social gatherings. While some in ideal positions had become more sought after than others, they were plentiful enough that any given bot had no need to worry about being unable to find a space for any occasion. Thus they were perfect for gatherings of any size at any time for all who called the ship home.

Despite the ease of procuring such a space on demand, however, Drift had been quite insistent on the specific one he'd rushed you towards without warning. Accustomed to his often sporadic ideas, you'd happily let him carry your tiny form in his broad arms when he promised explanations would be coming. Admittedly the fact that he'd appeared nervous had given you some pause though...

Until you'd actually seen the viewing deck and what he'd arranged within.

Framed almost as if by hand, a brilliant red cloud of space dust sparkled in the infinite blackness beyond, giving the room a soft glow akin to a warm fire or a fantastic sunset. Spectralism heralded such a color as one of friendship and eternal bonds, and as you took in the recently arranged decorations around the room that made a brilliant kind of sense. From the gem studded light strings wound about the ceiling, to the crystalline flowers flanking the door, and the little table in the center draped in fabric to look somewhat like an altar, it's clear the whole room has become a Spectralist symbol of true companionship. With everything you two have been through together, you have a good feeling as to why. It's so touching you actually have to fight the urge to cry.

"I spent so long getting everything ready, the nebula kind of snuck up on me..." He said bashfully, still holding you in his hands as he walked forward with a little sigh. The story painted a clear image in your head of a studiously decorating bot looking up to be surprised by a giant anomaly in space, as if it was a guest arriving earlier than it was supposed to, and you had to chuckle at his adorable nature. "But I don't want to miss it, so I hope you'll forgive me if things aren't perfect. The backdrop is just too important."

Certain as you were about the purpose of all this, you still decided to open with a question, letting your friend take the lead with you as support. "What is it the backdrop for?"

"I think you know, but..." He said, smiling through significant nerves despite how clear it was you were fully on board. For all of his progress, the poor bot was still easily overwhelmed by doubt. The fact that he'd made this attempt all on his own, even with obvious anxiety every step of the way, made you proud as much as you were touched by his gesture. Approaching the little table, he set you down on it with a deep ventilation. Something quite positive but weighty needed to come off his chest.

"You've only been in my life a little while, yet every day our friendship has gotten stronger, Y/N. You're one of the few people who can look past my mistakes, and you remind me why I want to be better in the first place. I want to let you know how truly I value your companionship."

Though he spoke quickly, enough that he clearly had memorized the words and worried about saying every one, you were absolutely touched near to the point of tears. He'd spoken about Amica Endura in the past, particularly as of late when he'd dropped not so subtle tests to gauge your feelings on the topic, but nothing could have prepared you for him actually requesting such a thing of you. It was the deepest expression of platonic love known to his kind, meant for friendships that endured through their seemingly endless lifetimes. To be considered worthy of such a thing simply made your heart feel like bursting with gratitude.

Lowering his voice a tad, as if to separate his next sentence from everything else, he offered you a hand and smiled softly but warmly in the delicate light.

"If... If you're okay with it... I'd like to become Amica Endura. I know you mentioned the idea sounded good, and that I'm you're best friend, but I just want to check." He said, speaking so tenderly you might have forgotten he was multiple times your own height. Happier than you could convey in words, you nodded and had to sniffle back some tears. To think of the suffering this bot had endured, the exclusion and bullying he went through every day, yet still he found the strength to be so kind... What were the odds a little human would end up meaning so much to him? At your dotting of tears, he tenderly tilted your chin upwards. "Y/N?"

"Sorry, just... You know I can be a sap." You said through a laughing sob, brushing away the wetness from your eyes to see him clearly when you spoke next. Holding one of his digits, you put your heart and soul into every word. It felt somewhat akin to baring a spark of your own. "But I do want to be Amica, for real. You're my best friend and I want that to be forever."

There was an immediate dampness in his optics, but he pushed it back with a few quick cycles of his shutters. Putting on the most wobbly of smiles, he lifted both hands and had you lay your own atop his digits, the closest the two of you could get to clasping them together. "Okay, I... I just hold your hands, say some words, and then you say "today, tomorrow, and always" after I do. Got it?"

Nodding, you watched in awe as he leaned back and opened his spark casing, revealing the brilliant glow of his essence to blend with the soft light already present, making it look like a miniature star was flaring in his chest. Cycling another vent, he looked into your eyes as he began.

"I bid you stand in the glow of my spark, so that you may feel the heat of my words and know them to be true."

The fact that the words were meant to be purely allegorical didn't make them any less powerful. You really could feel warmth from him, but almost on a different level than you'd ever experienced before, as if your happiness and his were filling the air between you. Perhaps the Spectralist beliefs about color connecting to emotion was true in ways you hadn't expected. Light from the cosmic cloud outside almost seemed to give his words the backdrop they needed to truly connect as he wanted, allowing every one to go straight to your heart and fill it with all the warmth and love he felt for you every day.

"I invite you to receive my light and in doing so become my Amica Endura—from now until forever."

You squeezed his hands softly as he hiccuped just a little, encouraging him to continue, and his voice broke a tad as he did.

"Y/N, for your empathy... As you are to me, may I be to you—today, tomorrow, and always."

A bit of coaxing was needed when it was your turn, not because you were hesitant but rather due to how difficult speech was while emotions overflowed your heart. Shamelessly sniffling and letting happy tears fall down a beaming smile, you took a deep breath at his soft look of reasurance. He trusted you to take your time in this.

"Today, tomorrow, and always." You said to seal the bond, meaning it with every fiber of your tiny being to stand by this bot to the end of your days. The two of you had met by chance, had started to bond over the littlest of moments, and now you were here. It was more perfect than things often went for anyone. Yet there was no need to question the how or why, especially when it led to a friendship as pure as this one. As he closed his spark chamber, you felt residual warmth in the air like the lingering of an embrace.

Which became a very real one when he scooped you up for a hug that was wordlessly agreed upon. Unable to wrap your arms around him at all, you settled for holding them wide and letting him press you close, feeling the smoothness of his heated armor as it hummed with life. Despite being as tiny as you were, it seemed quite apparent the hug was as powerful for him as it was for you. Tiny, happy sobs occasionally bounced his shoulders like little hiccups. It was a moment you could have lived in forever.

When he parted to give you a grin so genuine it confidently displayed his sharpened dentae, you did the same, unable to believe such little things could have the most wonderful of outcomes.

Support me here if you like my writing! Every donation helps me secure more time to create, and the same goes for commissions, which are always available!

#transformers #maccadam #mtmte #more than meets the eye #lost light #ll #idw #tf #my writing #commission #kofi #kofi commission #human reader #self insert #platonic #amica endura #drift

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razorblade180 · 3 years

Text

Twin Snowflakes 22: Ground Zero

Part 21 -> here! <-

Bad luck has been a part of Qrow’s life for as long as he could remember. It manifested in a variety of ways but there was one in particular that was absolutely the worst, travel. Flat tire on a road trip, inconvenient. Plane delay, well that one was probably not his fault, but it felt like it! Certain cases like that were always a little iffy on if it was him or life. As the veteran huntsman stood on the deck of his son’s boat in the pouring rain with a Kraken raising from the depths, Qrow was sure of one thing. This one had to be his fault.

“I didn’t think grimm this big were still around. We’re in the middle of the ocean for crying out loud.” Qrow sighed, grabbing harbinger.” It’s cases like this he’d usually leave. Two big problems though. Problem number one, Sparrow was already firing cannons at it. Problem number two, it was waving Oscar around like a toy. He seemed okay though.

“CAN I HAVE SOME HELP HERE!?” He screamed, louder than the roaring winds and rough seas. “THIS GUY IS REALLY SLIMY!!”

“Slip out then!” Sparrow shouted in earnest. Oscar might’ve been far away but Sparrow could tell the man was not amused by that response. “What!? Do you want me to shoot that arm with you in it!? Penny will have a fit if I shot you!”

“PENNY WILL HAVE A FIT IF I'M EATEN!!!” Oscar wiggled and squirmed before finally managing to create an orb to push the tentacle off, then dispelling the orb to drop straight down. Cannon fire rained down on the center mass like grand finale fireworks, but only angered the beast. More tentacles cut through the air to reclaim its lost hostage.

“Give me a break.” The rain continued to pour down and sting against Oscar’s skin. He paid no mind to the whirlpools forming or the ship deck quickly approaching. Oscar simply closed his eyes. “Hey it’s been awhile. Mind lending a hand?” He called, subconsciously to his old friend.

“Hehe Oscar, do you even have to ask?”

Oscar smiled, opening his eyes and seeing Oz smile back through the reflection of the rain drops before seeing his own again, complete with white hair and golden eyes. “Let’s get to it shall we?”

xxxx

Nick remained quiet as Weiss drove back home from school. He was happy he made it back in time. A gigas dragging him away after his fight with Valerie would’ve made the entire incident worse. Though if he was being honest, fighting a gigas sounded cathartic in a way. He gently pulled up the window switch over and over, repeatedly.

Weiss took note of her son’s unusually sad demeanor. “Alright, wanna tell me what happened in there? You were full of energy before getting your work, and I doubt the workload has spooked you.”

“Nothing I’m not used to.”

“Ah, Valerie troubles.” Weiss glanced over and saw Nick glare at his own reflection. Looks like she was right on the money. “Take it from me, I’m sure whatever happened had more to do with her own personal feelings and not the feelings you have for her.”

“You say that with such confidence.”

“I was a teenage girl once too, you know? One with plenty of personal hurdles I tried to associate with other people instead of myself. It doesn’t ever really stop truthfully. You just get better at accepting the fact the problems fix itself when you decide to change how to respond to it.”

“Do you think I have a problem I should change? Loving a girl who pushes me away, it probably makes me look like a joke.” He tried rolling down the window again but found the switch had been locked. Yet another thing to make him sad.

“I think it’s not the wisest thing you’ve done, but it’s definitely the most normal teenage thing about you. Joke or not, feelings are feelings. They’ll work themselves out. Just don’t force anything and before you know it, you’ll see things a lot clearer.” Weiss reached over and ruffled his shaggy hair. “Who knows, maybe you’ll see this dew of yours needs to finally change.”

“As if!” Nick laughed, “I look too much like uncle if I cut it, and any longer makes me look like dad.”

“Not if you style it. Oh, or grow it out even longer. Like when you’re little! “Weiss cooed, “You and Summer were really hard to tell apart then.”

“Yeah, and people kept calling me ‘she’ and stuff. Nooooo thank you!” He folded his arms in protest.

“That won’t happen now that you got your father’s looks. You’ll just be a pretty boy. Then if you get facial hair!? Nick, let me make you gorgeous! I have Coco on speed dial!”

“This is why you had a boy and a girl, mom! So I can escape this torture.”

Weiss pouted, “Summer likes doing her own makeup and hair. I should be proud considering it’s my old look from waaaaay back, but I still wanna change things up. I’d give this entire family a makeover if you all weren’t so whiny about it.” Weiss looked in the mirror at neck length hair. She remembered how free she felt the first time she cut it. Having twins meant twice the hair pulling, three times if she counted the one person she wanted to pull her hair. Thinking back, there was a good chance it was one of times Jaune pulled it that gave way to the discussion of kids in the first place.

“Hmmm, maybe I should grow my hair out. I miss the old length sometimes.”

“Summer would be so upset.”

“Good, then she’ll change it. That’s one family member down.”

Nick playfully rolled his eyes. A makeover didn’t sound too annoying actually. Maybe after the tournament? He’d think about it. “Hey, mind if we train again today? I got a lot of pent up energy and new ideas.”

“I suppose. Someone has to make sure you don’t overdo it. Winter is coming over too, so it’s for the best I warm you up anyways. I’m positive after your recent school events that she has a few words for you.”

Nick gulped, knowing he was in for a workout. “Well now…guess I’m dying today.” He could already feel his muscles ache.

xxxx

Meanwhile in the woods, Summer and Veronica had crossed into unfamiliar territory, casual conversation. It wasn’t going well. They both agreed to chat but neither of them were actually talking! They were just walking with Veronica taking the lead, leaving Summer awkwardly following a few steps behind.

The girl had finally pulled herself together after her little episode. In truth, she was a little embarrassed to say anything after it. She hated looking weak, especially in front of Veronica, a girl who manages to look strong against even the harshest of critics and peers. It was quite envious, her attitude. Summer would give just about anything to have it. Summer looked down at her scroll for what must’ve been the tenth time. Still no missed messages.

“Expecting a call?” Veronica finally said, noticing the Schnee’s gaze consistently drifting. “Got a boyfriend or something I don’t know about?”

Summer felt like that might’ve been a jab but chose to ignore it. “Nick always calls me if Shiva gets out or nearly escapes. He’s always had a sixth sense for knowing her moves. It’s unlike him to not immediately call, even if he’s doing something urgent.” Summer put her scroll away. “Him not calling is odd.”

“Are you telling me she almost got out earlier? I didn’t really smell anything.” Veronica looked back to see the girl look at her confused. A fitting look honestly. “The one time Shiva was out and even when we argued yesterday, I smelled peppermint, a disgusting amount of it. The diamond dust smells the same.” Veronica pointed to her nose, “I didn’t smell that earlier.”

“Oh.” was all Summer could say. It should’ve been a relief, but it wasn’t. “Great, my panic attack was just unhinged. Even when she’s quiet, she’s ruining my day.”

“Are you saying Shiva tries escaping when you’re hysterical?”

“Apparently not, or at least not all the time? Agh, it’s impossible for me to tell.” Summer was even more perplexed than before. “Just when have I been talking to her? They’re not all fake, but...they’re not all real either? I can’t afford not knowing the” Her train of thought was broken when a snowball thrown by Veronica hit her coat. “Hey! Wh-”

Veronica quickly covered Summer’s mouth. “Shhh! Grimm.” She pointed several yards into the distance where two sabertooth grimm were roaming. “Alright, do your thing.”

Summer looked at the grimm, then back at Veronica, who gave a casual thumbs up. “Wait, you’re not helping?”

“Nope.”

“Whhhhyyyyyy exactly?” Summer questioned.

Veronica sighed, because one of the reasons I wanted to be out here is to better see you in action. Why else would I tell you to bring your blade?”

“You lead me here under the assumption of a fight…” Summer deadpanned, “Couldn’t you have looked up old videos of me? I didn’t see you drag Nick off to fight grimm so you can make his outfit.”

“Nick has double the videos of him fighting, as well as him figure skating. Also, I pay more attention to him than I do you.” It might’ve been rude, but it was the honest truth. Summer didn’t even seem surprised. She just looked at Veronica with judgment. “What?”

“Nothing, much.” Summer drew her blade and put a glyph at her feet. “Any requests for data purposes?” She could not believe this was happening.

“Just handle them how you would normally, oh huntress in training.” Veronica teased lightly.

Summer pointed her sword out with her right hand and her right foot forward, then took off. The distance between her and grimm was closed in a matter second. She leaped over one, slicing it’s head off through the back of its neck. Another glyph formed midair behind her. Summer used it to kick off right after the attack and thrust her blade through the second grimm’s eye socket. Not even a snarl was heard before it died instantly.

Summer looked back at Veronica. “Cake walk. You’d get more data out of a video than th-”

“BEHIND YOU!” Veronica shouted.

Summer looked over her shoulder to see a third one already pouncing. With a subtle breath, Summer slowed its approach and then back stepped to safety. One more glyph was put under the paws of the beast and pulled out like a rug to trip it. Summer spun the chamber of her Myrtenaster and threw into its ribs like a javelin. The chamber landed on flame dust, setting it ablaze.

“Phew! That was...unexpected.” Summer said, coming down from a surge of adrenaline.

Veronica ran over to Summer, surprised. “How did you do that, the breath thing?” Veronica asked, “That’s a trick I’ve never seen.”

“ Oh that? Well…” Summer took her left glove off and focused. Little snowflakes started floating upward from it in place like a snow globe. “I’m not too good at it, but I can control a bit of Shiva’s powers. Only when I’m cold though, or freaked out, but that second one is more involuntary.” Summer put back on her glove, “considering the potential risks and conditions, I don’t use it in fights. Explaining it to officials would be a pain anyways.”

That made sense. Veronica could smell a hint of peppermint coming off Summer. That was Shiva’s power alright. This also explained the mass amount of ice she saw Summer create in her video fighting the Paladin. “Permission to touch you?” Veronica asked, like she always did. Summer nodded. Veronica reaches out and places two fingers against the pulse in Summer’s neck. “Any other Shiva related tidbits to share?”

“Ummm, we share a subconscious, sort of? More like a neutral ground.”

Veronica paused momentarily, “what?” She said, annoyed by all this cookie cutter information. “Gonna need more tidbits?”

“It’s hard to explain. I don’t understand it either.” Veronica looked at Summer, unblinking. Apparently that wasn’t a good enough answer. “Look, imagine something like...an ocean, just water and the sky above. Now flip it upside and make that ocean completely frozen. That’s more or less what the subconscious looks like. There’s ground to stand on, but I can’t really see. Depending if I’m actually dreaming or in a certain place, then that’s what the subconscious can look like. The only constant is that ice ceiling.”

Every sentence from this girl felt like a fever dream to Veronica. “Summer, I doubt you're lying to me, but do you by any chance also do drugs? You know, the hard kind.”

“As if!” Summer swatted Veronica’s hand off her neck. “First of all, drugs and I don’t mix. Second, be serious!”

“It was a valid question. Rich kids do a lot of things. If Nick told me he tried it before I wouldn’t be surprised. Saddened, but not surprised.”

“While I would be hounded by you no doubt?”

Veronica crossed her arms, “I’d berate anyone who would do drugs.” Her tone was stern and cutthroat, “It’s an ugly slope that goes down fast.”

The way she spoke about it was rather serious compared to what Summer was used to. “Have...you done drugs?” Summer asked cautiously.

Veronica thought about her answer carefully for a moment. “For a brief time, yes. I’m past it however, totally clean. I thought it might help control my instincts.” Veronica slouched over with a sigh, “Unfortunately, noooo dice. Come on. Let’s keep moving.” Veronica continued to walk.

Summer stood quietly for a moment, then followed as well. She wasn’t expecting to get to the topic of Veronica’s genetics in such a personal way. Then again, someone’s very birth is nothing but personal. Curiosity began to get the better of her. They did make a deal after all.

“V-Veronica…?” Summer stuttered, “I held up my end of the bargain. The only other thing that may be worth mentioning is Shiva only knows what I know when she tries escaping, and I only know what she does if I’m conscious. Other than that I think all the dribble about the state of mind would make you snore. So…..”

Veronica could tell where this was going. “Relax, I’m not about to break a deal that I proposed in the first place.”

She reached for a nearby branch and plucked a silver flower off of it. It’s five petals were spread wide Veronica placed it in her own hair. “I take it that even your school isn’t bold enough to ignore basic faunus knowledge and history, despite their…questionable place in said history?”

Summer nodded, “Hey, Atlas isn’t the kind of place to bury the leads. Older society and its people simply do what they want, how they want.” Summer cringed, “Not that doing so is exactly better in the long run. Besides, you think rich tycoons wouldn’t tell their heirs and shady dealers how they amassed their fortune? Atlas’s people might know too well the benefits and contributions the faunus play in our history and in a work capacity.” Summer felt sick saying that. “It’s disgusting really.”

“Couldn’t agree more. With all that said, how much do you wanna bet there’s aspects glossed over?” Veronica wagered.

“I could’ve sworn you made it clear that you have no interest in money?” Summer quipped.

Veronica let out a humorous breath, “Tah, a girl can change her mind can’t she?” Veronica watched Summer reach in her pocket and pull out a hundred lien casually, giving it up. Veronica was surprised. “We didn’t even make the bet yet.”

“If I knew everything, then I wouldn’t be curious about this in the first place. Odds of you teaching me something new about your people is a given.”

Maybe it was the fact that Summer was made of money, or had good intentions for learning more, but Veronica couldn’t take the money. She could only waved it away. “Geez it was a joke. Making you pay would look bad.” She said, in a forest with nobody but themselves around. “Qualities Like night vision and other adaptations aren’t the only animals traits given. It’s fundamentally built into everything about us. Disposition, personality traits, social skills, everything; the animal you are influences all of these in a variety of ways in varying amounts.”

“Like how faunus with nocturnal animal traits tend to take night jobs?”

“Veronica nodded, “Yes. A bird faunus might choose a home at high elevations, even if they don’t have wings. A deer or rabbit faunus may have to work harder at public speaking than let’s say a wolf faunus. The subtles can get even tinier; or as obvious as a feline faunus loving fish.”

Summer never really thought about it, but that made sense.“What you’re basically telling me is for a faunus, nature vs nurture takes on an entirely different level of complexity? Nothing stops a rabbit faunus from being a motivational speaker, but it would be more work, unless their parents or even their environment had predisposed them to be apart of a more vocal and outgoing lifestyle?” Summer’s eyes lit up. “That’s actually really fascinating, sowhere do you fit in with all of this?” She asked, wanting to learn more.

Veronica was taken off gaurd by how interested Summer was. “For a person who apparently hates school as much as I do, you look eager to learn.”

“School sucks because of social pressure and redundant information.” Summer deadpanned, “Anyone would get bored of learning material that is forced upon them and is as quickly discarded.”

“Well, I guess that’s true. I wouldn’t say I’m in love with any aspect of school, but learning is the least problematic part of what I had to think about it. Anyways, what I’ve told you so far applies to all faunus. With the way the world is and all the kinds of possible traits, finding a place to fit in isn’t difficult. Those animal instincts are very much submissive compared and don’t hinder our ability. Like you said, a rabbit faunus can do public speaking. A bat faunus can absolutely walk around in broad daylight. However, there’s a minority among faunus that have their animal gene act way more dominant than the majority. Roughly 13 to around 18 percent of the faunus population, if I remember correctly. This group, my group, are easily recognized by having exaggerated or extra features. Extra large wings, skin more animal than human, cold blood-”

“Ears and a tail?” Summer interjected, “appearance wise, you seem to have gotten off easy. You covered in fur or having whiskers would be a little distracting. Not gonna lie.”

“Externally, I’m just a tick higher on date lists for everyone with disturbing cat girl fantasies. Make no mistake though, I’m not the average faunus. Super faunus, the minority, have their animal qualities cranked up and deformed. I can’t see in the dark, but my nose is keener than any dog I’ve encountered. All those little traits I mentioned before? They tend to manifest in my people aggressively and often. To put into perspective, I have more in common with my grandpa than I do my mom, on an animal level.”

“Wow, that’s…intense. Your grandpa roars and gets all apex predator on people when he’s pissed- oh! Wait, your temper is shit because of your genes!?”

Veronica inhaled, ignoring the insult for the sake of conversation. “To a degree, yes. I cannot pin the blame entirely on my DNA, unfortunately…” she added that last bit quietly. “Despite what people write online about my family, we aren’t just cats. We are big cats. I’m a panther for crying out loud.”

Summer squinted, “Well, seeing how you’re mostly blonde, aren’t you technically more of a jaguar or a leopar-”

“Panther.” Veronica said, this time with feeling. “I could dye my hair red and that doesn’t change my DNA, Summer.”

For her own safety, Summer wisely chose not to make a very easy pink panther joke. She thought about it, but this conversation didn’t need to fall apart for the sake of Summer wanting to be a smartass to Veronica for once. “Fair enough, continue.” She said, still thinking about the joke.

“My athletic ability is exceptional, hearing too. My tail gives me balance more than other faunus. Despite the term super, anyone with the mutation would tell you how daunting it is. The type of animal, like everything else, determines what the faunus might deal with. For me it boils down two major things that contradict each other. Problem number one, not eating enough meat.”

“What happens?”

“Same thing that happens to any starved predator. I become impulsive, irritated easily, confrontational, my senses get...sensitive, adrenaline makes me dizzy-”

“So you’re super hangry?” Summer said without thinking. She immediately tucked her lips in and accepted the “you are an idiot” look that Veronica gave her without mercy. “Why the hell did I say that?”

Veronica groaned, “Minutes ago I heard you bring up nature vs nurture for comparing and explaining what I’ve said. Now you compare things to being hangry? It’s not even about how full I am, it’s the nutritional and instinctual part of devouring meat that my brain wants. It’s no different than your body craving milk for calcium. If I’m not careful and reach my limit, I tend to lose sense of reason and even blackout into a haze of instinct. Essentially, I go feral. Your brother can tell you that it’s not a pretty thing.” Veronica frowned.

The bruises on his face that day after school started to make a little more sense. No way he’d just let Max and Darren get clean hits in! He was dealing with an enraged Veronica. It actually put a lot of things in perspective. Summer couldn’t count how many times Veronica looked like she wanted to actually claw a person’s eyes out. She might’ve actually been thinking it over! That...was a scary thought. “What’s problem number two?” There was no way it could be just as bad.

“Eating too much meat. That’s when I’m an apex.” Veronica said, giving a thousand yard stare. Summer immediately took her statement back. That sounded way more problematic. “My attitude shifts. My fuse isn’t as short as when I’m starved but let’s say I can be very...demanding. Yeah, let’s go with that.”

Summer raised a brow, skeptical of that statement. “Are you saying-”

“Better think twice before saying I’m already demanding. Neither you or Nick has seen me when I’m caught up in the euphoria of being what I am. I’d put that girl Amber to shame, and my physical prowess are even better. I’m wild in a completely different way. Filter, broken. Can’t even put that state into words. So yeah, that’s my genetic mishap in a nutshell.”

“You being a food snob and all of your diets make a lot more sense now. Why keep this to yourself for so long.”

“Simple, it’s not anybody’s business what I’m dealing with. It’s handled, and doesn’t need to be explained among faunus. Living normally isn’t hard when you know what you’re dealing with, which is why I’m shocked every resource hasn’t been poured into figuring out your problem.”

That stung a bit. “Oscar is currently crossing the sea to potentially find answers, I have you know.” Summer said defensively.

A scoff came from Veronica. “No offense, but that sounds like a waste of energy.”

“Saying no offense doesn’t make me feel less hurt.” Summer folded her arms. “How would you know? Unlike you, my affliction has no prior information to go off of, and isn’t a genetic thing at birth. Any move could be closer to the truth, or a shot in the dark. For all intended purposes, you were born and live normally like anyone else.”

“Hate to make you sound stupid, but a test tube baby isn’t normal in most circles. Two moms, remember?” Veronica said, coldly.

Summer stopped walking. For some reason, that didn’t sit right with her. “Isn’t that name...an insult?”

“Yep.” Veronica kept walking, “Keep up. I’ll leave you out here.”

Summer listened. Maybe it was her imagination, but that atmosphere between them felt like it changed again. They had both held up their end of the bargain. Now things felt cold between them like before. Summer wasn’t expecting to learn as much as she did. Many things were answered today, so why did it feel like she knew less about Veronica. Blanks were filled into a picture she never knew the true size of, and still didn’t. One of those pieces felt out of place. The piece that helped put build up to this situation in the first place.

“Veronica…?” Summer uttered, “By any chance, does any of what you told me having anything to do with the torn pages in your-” suddenly, Summer’s words were stuck in her throat. Veronica had turned around to look her dead in the eyes, coldly and without care. Summer felt herself become small and beneath Veronica yet again, inferior.

“Never bring this topic up again, got it?” Veronica had to stop herself from balling up her hands, or she’d cut them with her nail. “Got it?” She said again, doing her best not to blow a fuse.

“S..sorry. I just...thought-”

“You thought wrong.” Veronica said. She turned around and kept walking. “We’re not friends.”

Heat rose to Summer’s face. It was impossible to know if she was feeling embarrassed, upset, or anything. All she knew was for a moment, she felt tears well up before vanishing. She breathed through her nose and bit back. “Yeah, I’m well aware.”

xxxx

“Sloppy!!!” The commanding voice of Weiss’s sister cried, knocking her nephew into a bush for the tenth time today. “You’re unfocused! Surely you can do better?”

Weiss witnessed her child stumble back to his feet, hair messed up and panting. He stabbed his sword into the ground to brace himself momentarily. His aura was still high, and yet… “Winter, he’s still under the weather. Ease up.”

“This is me easing up. You simply coddle him too much. Nick is more than capable of continuing. I don’t remember going as easy on you when you asked for training all those years ago. You turned out fine.”

“I wouldn’t exactly use our relationship as a standard.” Weiss mumbled.”

Nick raised his sword quickly. He channeled a fire ball to the tip of his blade as fast as he could, but was still too slow. Winter had already rushed towards his left. He had no choice but to abandon the fire attack for a block that barely withstood his Aunt’s blade. Nick slid backwards on the stone ground.

Winter shook her head. “Once again, you waste aura and energy not because the attack was a bad choice, but because you simply cannot use your semblance fast enough.”

Winter shot off a fire ball not even a second later. She waited closely for Nick to raise his block, then used a standard glyph to propel herself forward. Her speed surpassed the fireball, and Winter was able to position her blade behind him as the flame made contact with his.

Nick looked over his shoulder at her, frustrated, but not willing to yield. He pivoted around with his blade held out to direct hers away, then put a glyph between them. By the time he did so, Nick already knew she was on the move again. “Don’t count me out!” His left hand pulled a summoned sword from the glyph. Nick swung it out to the left and around to his back while his actual blade was swung right. The weight to Winter’s attack came from back and was blocked, perfect. He leaned his body left with his blade as he felt Winter shift that direction to his opened side.

Winter could only smile as she went in to strike. Nick just played her and she knew it. Her blade still clashed with the summon weapon, leaving his right blade free to use the momentum from the lean and make a clean stab with no chance for her to block. Winter did the wise thing and jumped back, abandoning her assault. His left side was never really opened. It was bait. Both swords were used to block wherever she came from. The right one only stopped short because the left one did the job of making sure she aimed for his back by swinging outward. Winter would have either been hit or blocked if she immediately attacked left or right, and the glyph protected the front. By making her attack his back, he all but ensured she would aim left next because it was the only unguarded spot, a spot he was ready to defend and attack from simultaneously. It was this kind of quick thinking and reckless style that separated Nicholas from anyone else. Even his sister. Especially his sister. Winter loved Summer to death, but the girl was quick to panic if plans fell apart.

Normally Winter would hear him say something self-indulgent. Nope. Just a quiet stare and a fireball he had to fire off thanks to the distance between them. Still…

“Nice effort.” Winter said, knocking it away with ease. “But no. The simple fact you can summon the sword of an Arma Gigas so easily yet remain sluggish with more basic functions of your semblance is a baffling talent. If it wasn’t for your unconventional swordplay that you somehow make work, I’d say getting a gold medal would be impossible. Still might be. It only does so much.”

“Well it’s a little late to change my style now. This is what I know best.” He dropped his sword and slowly let out a breath, filled with irritation. “I know I’m lacking.”

Winter raised a brow. She looked at Weiss confused, “What’s wrong with him? The usual?”

“No. Well, yeah, but he’s been stretched thin in general recently.”

“I’m not stretched thin. I just...nothing feels like it’s enough. Training in particular. Like you said, I can make swords in my sleep. All the other things our family is supposed to be good at, I’m average!”

Winter turned off mentor mode for a moment. Clearly this is more than about training, but she’ll play along. It was time to be an aunt. “Nick, you are in a class of your own. Sixteen and this skilled by no means is average. In regards to us, your family, no one here was perfect. Nobody here is perfect. Your mother still over extends her strikes from time to time and your father definitely wasn’t a genius by any means.”

Weiss narrowed her eyes, “Hey, I’m free game but be nice to my husband. You’re right, but be nice.”

“Like me, you choose to wield two blades. Unlike me, it’s your go to stance.” Winter informed, “Our semblance works best when we have a free hand. That’s why shields aren’t a good option for us. The choice to use two blades isn't bad by normal standards. I’ve faced many foes that pressured me with similar tactics, even beat me. Though only one is real, another sword has made it harder for you to use glyphs. At least it should be, but summoning and a video of your exam says otherwise.”

Nick looked at his summoned blade in frustration. “I still don’t know what I did differently that day. I was faster and more in control than I have ever been. Not only did I actually make a gigas, but even all my other glyphs felt on par with Summer’s.”

“Remember Nick, You and Summer excel at different things.” Weiss reminded him. “Yes, her fundamentals and use of dust are better, but she has a knack for it. That’s her edge. In a fight, Summer’s wide range of dust and glyph combinations always means she’s never out of range to attack or control a fighting space. You may not have that but your speed, stamina, and reflexes make up for it. In close quarters, no one your age matches you in Atlas.”

“That merit just so happens to have made you neglect the need to sharpen your other talents. Do you know how dangerous you could be with-”

“Time dilation? Yeah, mom told me.” He interjected, “something about those other things simply don’t click in my head. Can’t even get a fireball right.”

He sat down on the ground and took another breath. “The way I fight, it isn’t like I built it to be the most versatile. My offense is my defense. The use of momentum to add power behind my strikes helps keep in moving. It’s why my stamina and speed is good, to push my body for relentless attacks.”

He didn’t say it out right, but he didn’t have to. Nick made a style that didn’t make him good against a variety of people in mind. No, Nick thought of style against Shiva. In the end, that’s the only fight that matters. Beating others with it was a way to refine it for the moment it mattered. Abandoning it was not an option. Only improving.

Winter could only look upon the boy's face and see someone who only ever has the best intentions for others slowly begin to waver. Her teenage years were long gone, but no one ever truly forgets the confusion they went through during that time. Winter walked over to her young nephew and sat in front of him, legs crossed. “Why is it always the most caring of people who can never give themselves the break they give others? Nicholas Schnee, you are a kind, hardworking young man that never doubts himself often. Much like your mother, you take hold of what you want and clench it tight.”

“Lately holding on seems to hurt more than letting go. Nothing...feels right. Not just in training either. I feel like a gap between me and everyone else has been growing, like I’m out of a very important loop. Val, Vee, even Summer.”

“This time of year gets people stressed. It’s possible every one just needs a breath. I can speak much on a gap, but I’m positive time will mend it. Despite my feelings towards the young Belladonna, it is pretty clear the two of you get along. Confide in her.”

Weiss and Nick went bugged for a moment. They both looked at each other and then back at Winter.

“Wow.” Weiss spoke, “That’s pretty big, coming from you. Anytime you see that girl, you have nothing but disappointing looks.”

“Yeah Auntie, I’m shocked.”

Winter turned a little red, “I don’t see why. I may find her a bad influence on you and your sister, but my opinion is one of many. With you, Veronica is a welcome distraction to break up your daily routine. I’ll give her that much.”

“How generous,” Nick said sarcastically. Veronica was starting to sound more like a battle tactic than a person. Though she probably wouldn’t mind if it meant spending time with him. Regardless, “I appreciate the suggestions, but my time is better spent training at the moment. If I can be half as capable as I was during my exam, then I chalk that up as good progress.”

Winter hit his head. “Fool, you’re not getting it!”

“Ow! What!? All I said was- Ow!” Weiss also hit his head, much lighter though. “Stop hitting me! I thought this was a pep talk!?”

“It is.” Winter stated, “It’s also a lesson. The way you are now, you can’t progress much further. I urge you to really think about what made that day different from now; what made your last attack against me different even. That is all the hints I will provide to him. I do hope your mother keeps quiet as well.”

“Hey! I get I’m a little...lenient with him, but I would never skip an opportunity to watch him grow. Besides, telling him wouldn’t mean he could do it any faster anyways.” Weiss teased. She could hear Nick’s ears practically buzzing.

“If that’s the case then say it!” He asked eagerly. He was given no answer. Winter and Weiss walked away from him like they didn’t peak his curiosity. He assumed training was about to resume like normal. However, it didn’t. A look of shock came to him when both of his elders faced him, blades drawn.

“What, both of you at once.” He said nervously, grabbing his sword and rising quickly to his feet. “What happened to me being under the weather, mom!?”

Weiss smiled, “Hey, you wanted fast results. Until you find the answer to your glyph problem, we’ll double down or swordsmanship. Brace yourself. I’ll hold back.”

“I will not!” Winter smiled.

Nick didn’t even get a chance to blink before the two of them came after him. He gulped, “Should’ve stayed in bed.” Nick prepared himself when suddenly, a cold chill went down his spine. Weiss and Winter immediately recognized the look of fear on his face and stopped their approach while he pulled out his scroll to call his sister. “Pick up. Come on Summer, pick up!” He muttered.

xxxx

Summer felt like an idiot. Of course nothing has changed. Why would it? A talk didn’She walked faster, out pacing Veronica.

“Hey, slow down. I haven’t told you where we’re going.” Veronica said, but Summer didn’t listen. “Hey!”

“Leave me alone! I may not come here often but I live here. I’ll find my way without you.” Summer said, grunting as she forced her way through dense branches and bushes.

“Can you not act like a child for once!?” Veronica yelled, running after her. “And stop ignoring me!” Veronica was near her wits end.

“.........”

And then she reached it. Veronica’s tail and tensed up. “Summer!” Veronica yelled again, going through the bushes. “I said stop ignoring-” the potent odor of peppermint invaded her senses out of nowhere. Veronica looked around the area, seeing nothing. Nothing, but a frozen lake, shimmering with diamond dust below the surface; and Summer standing in place, shivering.

“Summer…?” She said, concerned this time. Her words didn’t reach, not immediately. The scent wasn’t only coming from the lake. Veronica didn’t dare to move as she watched a finger point across the water. Her eyes looked in that direction to see nothing but scared trees and large rocks that had been chipped rather deep.

“A fight?” Veronica thought. She looked closer. All the markings looked to be going outward and from one spot. A spot several feet off the lake. Even with all the dust, it was clear that spot smelled the most foul. “No, an explosion.” Her attention went back to Summer. “A dust explosion.” Veronica yelled again. “Hey! Summer! Answer me, please!?” She could no longer be calm. Veronica ran to the girl screaming her name.

Summer might as well have been deaf to Veronica’s voice. All she heard was laughter. Her laughter, coming from Shiva skating on the ice.

“Hahahahaha! Oh wow! We haven’t been here in ages Summer!!!” Grinning and filled with joy, Shiva extended her hand, “Summer, come join me!” The glow of her eyes grew more dazzling, as well as her smile. “Just like before….”

#rwby #rwby au #sparrow branwen #rwby twin snowflakes #weiss schnee #winter schnee #nicholas schnee #summer schnee #qrow branwen #veronica belladonna #oscar pine

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bubble-tae · 4 years

Text

BTS React to S/O Crying

“Hello! Can I request a bts reaction? They hear their s/o crying and then find out it was just because of a video of a puppy/baby XD thank you! ❤️” - anon

Warnings: Jimin’s mentions animal abuse

reposted from old account

NAMJOON

It was well known that Joon couldn’t help but be enamored by cute things. He even bought baby shoes for himself because he insisted that were just so adorable. It was an endearing quality of course, but being sent baby video after baby video made you numb to toddlers taking their first steps. When he came up to you with this sad expression for the thousandth time since you’ve known him, you merely rolled your eyes. He didn’t bother being hurt by your disinterest, knowing you’d eventually take his phone, which you did.

Instead of the normal video of a baby doing something cute, you were met with a FaceBook post about a child’s birthday party. Reading further, you saw that no one showed up to this little girl’s birthday party. The parents were asking for people to come, just so she would feel that people cared about her. You screenshotted the post onto Joon’s phone and wiped the tears that formed from your eyes.

“We have to go” you told him. He held his hands in yours.

“I already have a gift” he smiled back at you.

JIN

“How about I make us some popcorn?” Jin had suggested. It was day two of your period, and to help you through your particularly rough cramps you and Jin had decided on having a good ole fashion movie night. The candy barely made it halfway through the movie, and after something so sweet, Jin knew you’d be craving something salty.

While you heard the microwave whirring, you picked up your phone and went onto the Instagram explore page. As per usual, it was full of funny images and pictures of cute furry little animals. You clicked on a picture of a handsome dog, and your phone started playing a sad piano tune. The dog was waiting at the front door for someone to come home, and when the door opened it was a veteran home for a visit. The dog jumped into his arms and the man started crying, and before realizing it you were crying too.

Jin most have heard you because he bolted from the kitchen nearly slipped right onto his ass. He kneeled in front of you, asking a million questions. Between sobs he could make out the words “he come home” which I’m confused him further. You handed him the phone to watch the video, crying louder when the dog jumped into his arms again. Though Jin laughed he sat next to you and held you in his arms, the giggling in his chest almost putting you to sleep. That is, until you both smelled the burnt popcorn.

YOONGI

You were FaceTiming Yoongi from home while he was on tour. He was in some city and could barely keep his eyes open, but he insisted on seeing you before he fell asleep.

“It was actually a really good show tonight” he said after yawning. Your phone buzzed in your hand, a notification coming in from your friend. It read URGENT at the beginning.

“Hold on, I think somethings wrong” you said as you clicked the notification. Your face disappeared from Yoongi’s screen, only able to hear the quiet tapping of your fingers. He was on the hotel bed drifting into sleep when he heard the first sniffle, mistaking it for you maybe just having a cold. When you let out a small whine he sat up abruptly, almost dropped the phone off the side of the bed.

“What? What’s wrong? What’s happening?” He kept asking.

“Y/BFF/N… her daughter…” you let out.

“What’s wrong?” Yoongi asked again. Your face reappeared on his screen, this time with puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks. His heart sank and he feared for the worst. She was only three, and didn’t seem to have any health issues besides having minimal hearing.

“She…” you choked on your words, “she learned how to sign my name!” You finally let out with another cry and laying back down on your bed.

Yoongi let out an exasperated sigh, hand subconsciously finding his way to his chest.

“That’s amazing, sweetheart.”

HOSEOK

You jumped on Hobi as he lay on your shared bed watching videos. He let out a small groan when you put your weight on top of him before wrapping his free arm around you.

“Watcha doing?” You asked nosily, exceptionally bored on this Sunday morning.

“Watching fail compilations. Wanna watch?” He asked, already adjusting his arms so you can see his phone screen. He exited out the video he was watching so you can pick a new one together. There was one that had a thumbnail of a cat on a water slide, and you picked it immediately without even consulting your boyfriend.

“Hey!” He whined.

Before the video loaded, an ad began to play. It showed images of malnourished dogs with matted coats.

“SKIP IT!” you yelled at him. His hands frantically searched for the ‘skip ad’ function, but there was none.

“I CAN’T” he yelled back in the same distressed tone as you. The both of you sat screaming at his phone as more dogs kept appearing, until finally the tears were rolling down your face. The actual video started playing, but neither of the two of you were in the mood for funny videos anymore. You hid your head into the pillow while Hobi rubbed your back, letting out little sniffles as well.

“We have to donate…” you sniffled out.

JIMIN

“Why is this fun, again?” you asked Jimin as he set up his laptop in front of the both of you. Somehow in the midst of poking fun at each other, you had said that Jimin was a crybaby. He was determined to prove you wrong, setting up a “Try Not To Cry” challenge on his computer.

“It’s not, that’s the point.” he responded.

“Aw, did I hurt your ego?” you poked at him, only getting a side eye in return as he hit play.

The video started out fairly easy, cute animals and babies doing silly things that weren’t even sad, but about halfway through, things started to turn grim. The video did no work to even censor things that you definitely didn’t want to see. Your stomach didn’t turn easily but it was hard to keep watching. Jimin hadn’t moved an inch beside you, but you knew that the video was bothering him too. The last straw for you came when an image of a deathly sick child appeared on the screen. You slammed the laptop shut and your eyes started to water. Jimin sat up and clapped his hands together.

“I won!” he yelled with a smile on his face. You just looked at him as you cried, watching his face turn from happy to distraught as he realized what he had done. He pulled you into a hug, and even though he won, he felt like he lost.

TAEHYUNG

Taehyung, your husband, had been trying without much luck to transfer old videos he had on his phone onto the household computer.

“It just won’t work!” he whined at you in frustration when you asked him how things were going.

“Let me help” you said has he stood from the chair so you can sit down. He watched carefully over your shoulder as you dragged around different files and accepting certain security questions. The videos were beginning to transfer, but one caught your eye in particular. It was of yours and Tae’s first daughter when she was still a baby. It felt like only yesterday, but nearly 4 years and 2 more pregnancies have passed since then. You clicked on it and Tae’s hand made its way to your shoulder. The video started playing, and the room around you was filled with your daughter’s little giggles, and the screen had her rolling around in her cute little leggings.

You watched her raise herself onto wobbly legs, taking two shakey steps before falling into Taehyung’s arms. You were crying before the video was over, and you could hear sniffles from the man behind you as well.

“How about we pick her up early today?” he suggested. You nodded, and took no time to get up to go get your daughter.

JUNGKOOK

Last night you dreamt of your late dog again. It had been weeks since he was put down, but with Jungkook gone on tour the house just seemed even more empty. You tried to perk up and get on with your day knowing that Kook would be home shortly, but nothing seemed to lift your mood. You were very vocal to your boyfriend about your feelings, but he seemed to have shrugged off your text almost completely. To make things worse, his plane was going to be coming in a few hours late.

It was around ten when you heard your phone going off, an incoming FaceTime from Jungkook. You accepted it immediately.

“Baby..” he let out softly, “I think I’m going to be even later than I said.” Your eyes began to sting as tears threatened to break. All you wanted was him home tonight to hold you while you slept. Tears started to fall as you let out a small, “I miss you.”

“Don’t cry, his paperwork is just taking longer than I expected.” he said. You wiped the tears from your eyes and looked back at the phone. Joining Jungkook in the frame was a beautiful dog with a bandana on that read “ADOPT ME!”

“Meet Duke!” Jungkook continued, “our new rescue pup!” There were more tears coming now, this time from joy, and you practically begged him for his location so you can come there and meet them both.

#bangtanscenery #bangtanarmynet #btsghostie #bts reactions #bts x reader #jungkook x reader #taehyung x reader #jimin x reader #hoseok x reader #yoongi x reader #seokjin x reader #namjoon x reader #jungkook reaction #taehyung reaction #jimin reaction #hoseok reaction #yoongi reaction #seokjin reaction #namjoon reaction

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margridarnauds · 4 years

Note

I know you prefer a-cast, but what are some pros to buying m-cast instead? There's a bit of a war going on abt which is better. I heard m-cast is better bc the cast is more senior and experienced, but I don't know what to believe. Is a-cast or m-cast just a taste thing, or is it abt smthing else? Would you mind making a chart or smthing for the pros and cons of both versions? Maybe ratings per category? I know you have a preference, but I just think you are quite nuanced. Thanks in advance!

I am very honored that you would think of me as someone who’s fair and nuanced!

Before I begin, I’m going to say one thing that might or might not be considered....well. Very American of me, from the perspective of Japanese fandom: I do not believe, when it comes to spending the amount of money that these cost, on holding back information in order to appear diplomatic. I’ll try to be diplomatic, for the sake of people who might like anyone I criticize, but, also, if I dislike an aspect, I will try to find SOME way of making said displeasure known, because, again: The amount of money required to buy one DVD, let alone two, is quite a lot. I personally like to buy both, since it lets me compare and contrast, but my God, is it a bit of money (and this year, with the exception of the 2016 Elisabeth, I’ve had to cut down quite a bit while I’ve been abroad: I haven’t touched Frankenstein or Phantom...at least not yet.)

Also, I am always willing to arrange streams of either/both casts, since this musical is my baby, so that anyone reading this now can see whether what I say is true or not, as well as in order to determine your own preferences.

Alright, so that disclaimer out of the way, let’s start off:

I kind of disagree that M cast is more experienced, as a whole. Let’s compare:

Marie

Rena Sasamato (A Cast) - Had her debut when she was ten years old, in 1995. She is a Toho veteran with many, many musicals under her belt, including The Woman in White, Love Never Dies, Jekyll and Hyde, Les Miserables, West Side Story, Rudolf, Fiddler on the Roof, and, of course, the original 2006 production of Marie Antoinette, where she played Margrid Arnaud.

Hanafusa Mari (M Cast) - Almost needs no introduction, such is the fame that she has. And I say this as a detractor. My personal feelings about her personality, acting, and singing aside, I can admit that Hanafusa Mari is a living legend in the Japanese musical industry. She certainly lives up to her title of “Empress”, in all senses of the term. She had her debut in 1991 (after, admittedly, undergoing the training of the Takarazuka Revue, so I will give her that she had experience beforehand, just not in acting and singing on stage), and remained there until 2006, when she retired in conjunction with her fellow top star, Yoka Wao. From 2010 onward, she appeared in non-Takarazuka roles, including my very first exposure to Japanese theatre, Dracula, in 2011.

Now, of the two of them, I won’t deny that Hanafusa has more experience, however I also feel like saying that Rena has less experience is making it sound almost like she was some starving waif that Toho picked off the side of the streets in order to star in their new musical, as opposed to a seasoned actress in her own right who, on top of having an impressive number of musicals under her belt, also has experience in the musical itself. Hanafusa, when it comes down to it, only has four years’ more experience than Rena, though she is almost a decade older and undoubtedly, when she premiered, had more polish than 10 year old Rena. But, on the other hand, she DID remain with the Revue an impressively long time, which is very intense as far as how many musicals they perform on a yearly basis (most Top Musumeyaku only last about...2-3 years or so), she was the original Elisabeth in Takarazuka (a legendary role in its own right), and, my snark about her having the best career money can buy aside, I am willing to say that, for the most part, she’s earned her status as a legend.

And I want to say that I’m not ripping YOU apart when I say this, I want to make that absolutely clear. You’re asking me a very good question, but it is something I tend to find quite a bit of when I talk Japanese musicals, in the sense that there is often this...assumption that actresses who started off in non-Takarazuka musicals (also a moment of silence for the Shiki actresses, who I almost never talk about but who are kicking ass as Disney Princesses) are somehow...lesser, or that they have less training. Takarazuka is and remains very prestigious, but it’s hardly the be-all, end-all of all musical theatre, and, in many ways, I would argue that Rena has more experience than Hanafusa, in terms of the world of Toho musicals, which require a different style of acting and singing: Less stylized, less affected, more what you would expect from a Broadway or West End show. It’s actually something that I find quite a few Takarazuka actresses struggle with when they come to Toho, as they have to adjust how they’ve done things for a new audience.

Now, what does this have to do with the overall point? Well, a lot of people bought Marie Antoinette FOR Hanafusa to begin with, since she does have a huge following. I have seen plenty of people admit that they only bought it for her in the first place and didn’t bother with the other cast. I have even seen, in the past, people argue with me on the idea of a musical that DOESN’T have Hanafusa in it getting a proshot, simply because, for them, she IS the world of Japanese musical theatre. Coming from that perspective, of course Rena is less experienced, because she, simply put, isn’t Hanafusa.

In terms of their overall presentation of the characters, I found that their respective training really impacted how they portrayed the characters: Rena played Antoinette as being very elegant, with a pride that could turn to haughtiness. It made for an Antoinette that is interesting in her own right to watch, which is tricky, since I find that Antoinettes tend to be overshadowed by the other characters, especially Margrid, Fersen, and Orléans. She did include certain aspects of a Takarazuka performance in her performance, since her mother was a Takarazuka star in her own right, such as how to properly use an 18th century fan, but, for the most part, I’m willing to say that she played it much more naturalistically.

Hanafusa, meanwhile, emphasized the tragedy of Marie’s life. Throughout a decent portion of the musical, she can be seen crying, especially during the trial (which Rena played straightfaced, playing a Marie that is totally numbed by grief), and expresses her happy, joyful moments in a very exaggerated, almost forceful way, more what I would expect from a Zuka actress given that Zuka performances tend to emphasize extremes of sadness and happiness. (Keeping in mind, of course, that traditionally, it’s expected for musical/opera singers to act in an exaggerated way in order to be seen from the back.) If you are used to Hanafusa, then you’ll LOVE it, because she is very much there, and it’s very much what you’ve been accustomed to. She does show her training; she doesn’t miss a single note in the entire production, but I do find that, in this one area, her added age over Rena might be to her detriment, as I find that her voice has thinned somewhat with age, comparing her now to where she was in Dracula or during her Takarazuka days. Her vibrato also isn’t quite to my taste. Not BAD, but not for me. She isn’t UNPLEASANT to listen to, and again, if you are buying it to hear Hanafusa Mari’s voice, that is exactly what you’ll get, but I also do think the luster of it has faded.

So, in terms of overall ratings, here is what I would put them:

Rena:

Year of Debut: 1995

Acting: 9/10

Singing: 10/10

Hanafusa:

Year of Debut: 1991

Acting: 4/10

Singing: 6/10

Margrid

Sonim (A Cast) - Sonim’s history has been gone into detail here by my friend, @chibimyumi who, unlike me, has a native speaker’s understanding of Japanese (as opposed to getting lucky with Google Translate), so I’ll leave it to her. But, suffice it to say, Sonim had her musical debut about...2007 or so (she was involved in other stage projects, but for sanity’s sake I’m marking her appearance as Johanna in Sweeney Todd as her musical debut) after the idol industry decided to be cowards and kicked her out because she didn’t conform to their pretty pink princess dreams, was offered the title of Ogosho IMMEDIATELY upon her joining up with Toho, and, since then, has distinguished herself as one of their undisputed leading ladies. She has appeared, to my knowledge, on three proshots, two of which I own: Mozart, 1789, and Marie Antoinette, and has also appeared in Kinky Boots, Tanz der Vampire, FACTORY GIRLS, and Rent.

Natsumi Kon (M Cast) - Natsumi Kon is, admittedly, also no slouch in the world of Japanese musical theatre: She had her debut in 2011, with the coveted role of Juliette Capulet in Romeo and Juliet, and has since been in Les Miserables, Grand Hotel, the Addams Family, The Fiddler on the Roof, and The Secret Garden, as well as being the voice actress for Belle in the 2017 Beauty and the Beast. She has been praised as essentially being “the next generation of the musical world”.

By the same standard I’ve set re: Hanafusa and Rena, there isn’t THAT much in terms of their ages, since they have the same difference in debut time (though in this case, it’s in Sonim’s favor, and I also think that it’s much more dramatic in terms of younger musical performers as opposed to older ones.)

I feel like, of the two of them, more people would have come for Sonim, since she is an Ogosho herself, being at the same level of ranking as Furukawa and Hanafusa. What I suspect, in fact, is that Toho, in a CLASSIC Toho move, split the cast that most people would have wanted, with Hanafusa, Furukawa, and Sonim, but I can’t confirm and, honestly, I feel like Hanafusa’s very expressive Antoinette would have clashed with Furukawa’s more aloof Fersen, but that will be dealt with down the line. As it is, M cast has Hanafusa, and A cast has two Ogosho-level performers for the price of one with Sonim and Furukawa. (Meaning that, on a purely technical level, it has the most starpower behind it.)

Sonim has a strong belt and has a reputation for playing scrappy girls, possibly because she herself easily qualifies as a bit of a “scrappy girl” herself. Her Margrid is bitter and cynical, not necessarily kind. The years on the streets have warped her into someone who is primarily motivated by herself and her own personal revenge. She uses “the people” as a self-justification to pursue her own vendetta, only realizing by the end what it’s done and cost her. She doesn’t care for social norms AT ALL, and would be the exact type of person that you would see on a tabletop counter at 2 AM, legs spread out, trying to stuff an entire pizza down her mouth. She’s distrustful, especially towards men and, even for those that she trusts, she has a low level of tolerance for. She is, frankly, a bit of a bitch. And I adore her for it, because it’s more realistic to what I think someone would be like after undergoing what she has. She’s a kind of female character we get relatively little of, really. I do think that, on a few occasions, Sonim perhaps outbelts herself here but, in general, I feel like it suits Margrid’s personality more.

Natsumi Kon took a more tragic bent to the character. Her Margrid IS a good person, at heart, but she lets her desire for justice, along with her own revenge, steer her towards a course that just causes more suffering. She is more like an 18th century Eponine from Les Miserables, the street girl who, if she’d JUST had the upbringing that Antoinette had, could have been a great lady like her. She seems to play up the love triangle with Fersen more, getting a little closer to him at different times, giving him more longing looks, while also seeming to have...some sort of dynamic with Orléans, with the two of them often touching and laughing with one another. She does have a very smooth, strong voice, though I feel like, on some level, she has never quite escaped playing ingenues, and, rewatching it with a critical eye, I think that, as the musical continues, her voice starts getting a little breathy and strained. I don’t really know whether this is by intent or simply because of the musical being very vocally demanding for the Margrids, but I do think that, if Sonim overbelts at times at the beginning, Natsumi has some issues by the end; the notes aren’t coming out quite as clear or as strong as they should be. Her Margrid has a little bit more of a polish to her and, in general, seems a little younger and more naive compared to Sonim’s. I do give her credit for really being willing to go UP CLOSE to her fellow actors in stand-offs, giving her Margrid the sense of being a little bit of a bull in a China shop; during the duet that Marie and Margrid share, there’s one point where it seems like Natsumi is only INCHES away from her face. I know that it’s out of style to make Harry Potter analogies, but Sonim plays Margrid as a Slytherin; Natsumi as a Gryffindor. She didn’t do a BAD job as an actress, and in fact adds some nice touches to Margrid that I do like, but she doesn’t really do anything too new with the character.

Now, why does THIS matter? Well, for one, I think that, if you go in expecting the best of everyone, Sonim’s Margrid can be like a dose of cold water. Natsumi is more...palatable. Less conflict, less difficult questions, especially since it becomes that much easier to separate Orléans-As-Villain from Margrid-As-Heroine.

Overall:

Sonim:

Year of Debut: 2007

Acting: 10/10

Singing: 9/10.

Natsumi:

Year of Debut: 2011

Acting: 8/10

Singing: 8/10

Fersen

Furukawa Yuta (A Cast) - Probably one of Toho’s most bankable male leads at the moment. His presence in a musical is generally a VERY good sign to me that Toho is planning on a proshot, since they know that fans will buy anything he’s in. (To illustrate: I wasn’t PLANNING on buying Marie Antoinette, I had more than my fair share of doubts after the disastrous German run, but then I saw Furukawa Yuta and Sonim were signed on and I promptly got both casts. Best insanely rash move I’ve ever made in my life.) He had his stage debut in 2007 with The Prince of Tennis series, and since then he’s played in the Black Butler (Kuroshitsuji) musicals, Elisabeth, 1789, Romeo and Juliet, and Mozart. Though he initially made his name with his dancing and acting abilities, along with his personal charisma, he has since worked on his singing, putting himself through Hell and back to earn his spot as Ogosho. While Mozart was his official debut, I would argue that, in some ways, it was as Fersen and then, later, Romeo that he REALLY got to demonstrate what made him star material.

Mario Tashiro (M Cast) - Mario Tashiro, like Natsumi Kon, is absolutely no slouch either. He has a full, operatic voice that he uses to excellent effect, making him very recognizable even if you don’t know who exactly he is. Plenty of times, I’ll be listening to a trailer on Youtube and hear this BOOMING voice and go “MARIO TASHIRO?” He has been very prolific on the Toho scene, taking roles in Sunset Boulevard, Chess, Love Never Dies, Elisabeth (marking the first time in known history that Fersen is locked in a love triangle with Fersen for Marie Antoinette and then seduces Fersen’s son, Fersen), The Great Gatsby, Jekyll and Hyde, and Sweeney Todd, among others.

In terms of approach, both men took very different approaches to their role. Furukawa played Fersen as much more aloof and distant, which makes for a contrast with Marie’s sunny, naive personality. He has a dry sense of humor and has a long-running cat and mouse game with Orléans where both understand, on some level, that they’re on equal ground. His love of Marie, while definitely a real, true love, is also very idealistic: Marie represents a world that, for Fersen, is slowly dying out, she represents the best part of humanity for him, especially after being gone during the war. I do not believe, looking at Furukawa’s Fersen, that he and Antoinette ever actually slept together, rather that it was very much a courtly love. He cares for Margrid, entreating her to have compassion, but there’s just enough wiggle room to wonder how MUCH of it is genuine VS him needing something from her at the time, and he’s very aware of his status as an aristocrat and makes use of it. It’s really unlike any other take on Fersen I’ve seen, in any media, and it’s part of why I ended up leaning towards this production, since it’s generally a MASSIVE feat to make me like Fersen. Furukawa’s voice in the role is softer, lacking the strength of Tashiro’s but still making for some very impressive low notes.

Mario Tashiro, on the other hand, focuses more on Fersen as a romantic hero, full of dash and daring. He has a notably dramatic take on Fersen, with flourishes and exaggerated movements, which, as an opera singer, are probably part and parcel of his acting training. If he’s aware of Orléans’ general presence, he doesn’t seem bothered by him, with their being really little sign that Orléans has any respect for him at all. He loves Marie as well, but it is much more of a sort of fairytale, Rose of Versailles love. There’s not as much moral gray areas to his Fersen, even though he makes the exact same decisions as Furukawa’s and, like Hanafusa Mari’s Marie, tends to go through extreme emotions. His voice was, as always, phenomenal, I give him full and complete credit for it, however, unfortunately, when put up against Hanafusa Mari, I found that the two of them had the tendency of trying to outbelt one another, leading to a distinct lack of chemistry during romantic scenes. (And you’ll notice that, despite generally being weighted against Hanafusa, I am NOT giving her the full blame for this one.)

Furukawa Yuta (A Cast)

Year of Debut: 2007

Acting - 10/10

Singing - 9/10

Mario Tashiro (M Cast)

Year of Debut: 2009 (He had his singing debut in 2007, but his overall musical debut was 2009)

Acting - 7/10

Singing - 10/10

Louis

Takanori Sato (A Cast) - Probably the baby of the group, in the sense that he had his own debut a little while after the others, in 2015. In his case, and his case alone, would I say that there was a REALLY strong case for him not having as much experience compared to his counterpart. He has played in Titanic, Elisabeth, the Scarlet Pimpernel (the one with Kazutaka Ishi), Mata Hari, Legally Blonde, and Chess, the latter possibly most impressively since he did the entire thing in English.

Yuichi Harada (M Cast) - I’ll be honest, I’ve never in my life been tempted to look up his biography before, but when I did, I was impressed to find that he’s actually been working in the world of musicals since 1992, when he was in Anne of Green Gables and then again in Les Miserables as Gavroche. He has had a long career with Toho, too, being in musicals such as Les Miserables, The Sound of Music, Titanic, the Beggar’s Opera, and La Cage Aux Folles, none of which I literally had any idea about until today, but that is very impressive. Massive props to him, honestly, as well as working as a director for Bare: The Musical, which...well. Props to him for branching out. I will never understand the love for Bare worldwide, but you know what? Almost all musicals deserved to be loved by SOMEONE. He has an impressive track record, I’ll give him that. One of these days, I’ll probably have to dig deeper, since I suspect that there’s a lot more to him than meets the eye.

Takanori has a very smooth, strong voice, without the projection of Mario Tashiro. I found that his take on Louis was quite charming, tender to his wife, a normal man who Marie respects even if she doesn’t love him in the same way as she loves Fersen. (Honestly, can I just say: While we all know that Orléans has my entire heart....if Takanori’s Louis asked me to marry him....#PhilippeWho.) He’s a steady man, not really dumb, but well-intentioned and occasionally oblivious to the real danger, and it’s that that kills him, in the end.

Yuichi’s Louis is much more...confused throughout the thing and, while I think Antoinette has some compassion for him, I don’t really feel like it’s love so much as...affection, mixed with a certain amount of pity. He does show moments where it looks like he knows a lot more than he lets on, but in general, I think he did play it as much more humorous, a lot more...well, dumb, at least until the second act. He does have a solid voice, I give him that, but in general, it felt like there was a little less subtlety in how he interpreted the role. There’s something almost childish about the way that he grasps Orléans’ hands when he’s asking him to intercede for them, whereas in Takanori’s case, it’s more him realizing that his cousin is...well. Orléans, but knowing that he has to do a little bit of crawling if he’s going to survive.

Yuichi’s Louis DOES still get sympathy from me, but it’s in a way that is kind of insulting to him as a character, mainly because it’s less about HIM and more like “......god. Killing him is a bit like kicking a puppy. Like, you could do it, but my God, why would you?” Like, I do kind of want to write a fanfic where he can just......be safe........far, far away from everything, because I’m not sure if he would notice if they took him any place else, but it does kind of...take away his complexity? I will say, in his defense, looking over his entire performance, that seeing him constantly trying to smile as he’s being led while Marie panics, trying to let her know this is all going to be alright, is a tearjerker, though I still feel like his Louis is played a bit too much like the caricature of Louis that, at this point, I’m kind of used to seeing. That being said, while I don’t necessarily like all of the DIRECTION he took Louis, I can see that he put genuine thought into constructing the role, so I’m not going to nuke him too much in the acting category.

This one, more than any of the others, is probably YMMV, because I know people who were genuinely shocked to realize Louis is double-cast at all. Mainly because it isn’t like the role leaves THAT much of an impact, overall, having only one major song. I honestly think that the 2021 cast is making the right call in splitting Orléans and giving Louis one role, all things considered.

Takanori Sato

Year of Debut: 2015

Acting - 10/10

Singing - 10/10

Yuichi Harada

Year of Debut: 1992

Acting - 8/10

Singing - 8/10

The Case for M Cast

Now that we’ve gone through the rankings, it’s time for the original question: What are the pros of M Cast? And, if you just listened to me laying all this out, you would think that I wouldn’t have much positive to say. That being said, when I was back in the States and could spend an hour or two watching musicals every day, a LOT of the time, I would watch M Cast. There has never really been a point where I said “You know? I regret getting that cast, I wish I’d just had A the entire time.” If I was dangling off a cliff and I could only save one cast recording, I would HAVE to choose A (and then promptly sob), but I do, genuinely, like M on its own and would recommend getting both simply to compare.

- Mitsuo Yoshihara. Now, this is going to be odd for anyone reading, because I can hear it now: “But he wasn’t double cast! Wouldn’t you get him on A too?” Yes, you definitely would. But he is a very unique type of Toho actor in the sense that he changed up his performance for EACH cast he was in. If you look at M cast, he has a much warmer dynamic with Natsumi’s Margrid, either as a paternal substitute (making up for her own aristocratic father) or as a prospective love interest. He is MUCH more hurt in the final court scene, very clearly viewing Margrid’s decision as a personal betrayal. As the admitted and confessed Morléans shipper, I have to eat the angst up like it’s candy. The two of them have a nice amount of familiarity and chemistry with one another, presumably due to having worked with one another on other projects before.

- Mario Tashiro’s voice. This deserves its own section because it is REALLY, REALLY phenomenal. You know whenever you’re seeing Mario Tashiro in something simply because that voice is VERY distinctive and is totally overwhelming each time you hear it. I noted my misgivings in his section, but overall? It is very much worth the price of admission just to hear him.

- Different shots. I’m still figuring out exactly WHAT shots dramatically change from each cast, but M cast does contain some shots that A doesn’t have and vice versa. M cast doesn’t have this shot of Margrid and Antoinette, and A cast doesn’t have the one here of Antoinette and Fersen’s hands touching, which is a wonderful little bit of cinematography. I do think that, depending on the shot, you can get more or less of a character’s motivations in that moment. A personal favorite is Hébert trying to get Margrid alone during the scene just before the ball and Margrid shoving him off, which foreshadows what happens near the end of the second act.

-Hanafusa and Natsumi’s voices actually do go quite nicely together at the end.

-Mario Tashiro does make for a very splashy Fersen; yeah, you might not spend too long dissecting what he’s doing when he’s on stage, but he is fun to watch swish around in his 18th century officer’s outfit.

-My griping on Natsumi’s Margrid aside, I do think she has a lot of charm. No, it isn’t my FAVORITE take on the role, but I do actually like what she does, she adds quite a few nice touches to it, and she does make the song “Enough is Enough”, near the end of the first act, her actual bitch, adding her own riffs onto it to give it a sense of individuality. The parts where she’s smiling, hanging onto Orléans’ arm, make even my wrinkled, shriveled heart grow three sizes. I’ll be genuinely excited to see her return to the role in 2021 to see if there’s anything she changes, though I doubt I’ll be able to see any part of it in person.

-If you’re a Hanafusa Mari fan, you get to see the kind of performance from her that you’ve grown to expect and appreciate. If you’re not, you get to see her get splashed in the face with champagne. Win, win, win.

Overall, I think that it will depend on what you’re looking for. I really enjoyed the realism and the grit of the A cast, but not everyone WANTS grit, and in that case...I suppose M cast would appeal more, since M cast relies on everyone involved being much better human beings than A cast, though I do want to emphasize that everyone in A cast is still redeemable. (Except Hébert. Because fuck Hébert.) M cast is....easier to digest, in many ways. There’s a good queen, a stupid-yet-sweet king, a dashing hero, and a misunderstood-yet-angry-poor girl, manipulated by the siren’s song of the Revolution and her unrequited love for Fersen, who bullies the poor, downtrodden queen when she gets a chance before realizing the error of her ways. I think that, for many people, that’s perfectly fine, and that’s what they wanted, especially if they’re already used to Rose of Versailles. I do still LIKE it, because it’s a production of one of my top 2 favorite musicals, but I do think that, if it was the ONLY version of the musical available, I wouldn’t have spent so much time picking it apart. (Though I still would have thought it a MASSIVE improvement on the German.)

I do put a lot of it on Hanafusa Mari’s influence, though, because of the prevalence of her fanbase and the general belief that no one could ever come close to their star, so why bother getting another cast. Especially given how....devoted the Takarazuka fanbase is in comparison to the Toho fanbase, and the Thing I’ve noticed where fans try to argue that there is some sort of empirical reason for their bias as opposed to simply liking one more than the other.

#Anonymous #long post #toho stage #jmusicals

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Movie Review | The Decline of Western Civilization series (Spheeris, 1981-98)

Many years ago, before I sold out to the man, I have to admit I felt a certain attraction to punk music. No, I was never anywhere close to a full on punk (I was, and still am, extremely lame), but I have to admit the anti-establishment streak definitely resonated with me at a certain point of time. (Not that it still doesn’t, but in addition to selling out, I’ve softened with old age.) Like many people I’ve found appealing the political conscience and mix of influences of the Clash, or the boneheaded energy of the Ramones, but I also found my interest straying to hardcore punk. I remember the first time I listened to “Damaged II” by Black Flag and finding it unbelievably abrasive and foreign to my ears, yet it was something I couldn’t get out of my head, and returned to the song and the album it was from a few years later and appreciated it as one of the most forceful expressions of angst ever recorded. I remember first learning of bands like X and Fear, and seeing performance footage on YouTube and being thrilled by the rawness and danger, especially when they had to fight off their fans. This footage was from Penelope Spheeris’ cult classic documentary, The Decline of Western Civlization, which for years was not easily available but I have now finally seen in its entirety.

The movie is structured simply, moving from one band in the L.A. punk scene to another, interviewing them in their natural habitats and punctuating this with footage of their performances. Songs are presented in full so we can get the complete experience. The first band we see is Black Flag, then with frontman Ron Reyes. They are lively on stage but it’s interesting to note how different the energy was prior to the arrival of Henry Rollins, who brought a certain discipline and muscularity to their music. (One of the songs featured here, “Depression”, pops up again in Damaged, and the impact in the latter is noticeably more forceful.) The guys here come across as aimless and destitute, living in a decrepit church where they’ve turned the closets into makeshift bedrooms, seemingly losing money with every gig. But they are also quite affable (you can tell the lyrics of “TV Party” sprang from these minds) and do not have illusions about their situation, especially their difficulty in getting gags thanks to their rowdy fans. These scenes play like a moment frozen in time, right before the band’s most significant period would begin. We move next to the Germs, and these scenes play like a car accident in slow motion, with Darby Crash’s self-destructive tendencies on full display. This was a short time before his death, which occurred between completion of filming and the theatrical release (his image was featured heavily on the promotional materials), once again giving this a lost in time quality.

Next we go to the headquarters of Slash Magazine, the staff of which moonlights as a band called Catholic Discipline. The frontman complains about New Wave, claiming it doesn’t actually exist, yet they come across as downmarket New Wavers who are slumming it in the punk scene. Yet their love of music and their work is obvious and the frontman does possess a certain charisma. Much of what we see of the punk lifestyle is squalid and dismal, yet the music of X manages to poeticize this condition. Their unassuming demeanours during their interview contrast sharply with their vigour in their performances, during which they do their share of batting off overeager fans. We get a burst of political conviction when the Circle Jerks launch into the libertarian anthem “Red Tape”, but this dissipates by the time they start playing “I Just Want a Skank”. We spend some time with the Alice Bag Band and then are treated to a montage of interviews with punk fans. These are shot in monochrome with stark backgrounds and a single bulb providing the lighting, which has the effect of bringing them and their words into sharp relief. We hear similar stories again and again, of aimlessness and aggression, the subjects using the music both as an outlet for their frustrations and inspiration for violence.

Spheeris’ camera has been largely nonjudgmental, yet there’s an undeniable sadness in this sequence. But lest I make it sound that the movie makes punk seem uniformly depressing, the closing sequence provides a potent antidote. The electrifying final minutes of the film feature a performance by Fear (who are not interviewed). The atmosphere here is hostile, with the band riling up the audience with homophobic and misogynistic taunting and having to physically fight them off throughout their set list. It might be tempting to liken their shtick to cheap alt-rightish provocation, but I think that robs their music of the proper context. When almost all their peers and fans adopt an attitude of “everything sucks”, Fear’s ability to find the humour in that mentality is kind of refreshing. It also would ignore the sheer muscularity of the delivery, which almost turns the music into a form of violence. The film is undeniably a fascinating document, but while Spheeris may have had the good fortune of turning on her camera in the right place and right time (even if she had to pay to rent soundstages to film some of the performances), it’s moments like this of pure exhilaration that cement the film’s greatness.

Part II: The Metal Years takes place almost a decade later, with a drastically new context and perspective. This time the focus is on the L.A. metal scene, which was a dominant cultural force unlike hardcore punk ever was. And this time around Spheeris’ POV is less of impartial observation and more satirical condescension. Taken journalistically, the movie is obviously compromised, particularly in an interview of Ozzy Osbourne that’s misleadingly edited to make it look like he has the shakes. I wish the movie hadn’t done this, as Ozzy is a flamboyant enough presence that he’s already funny without needing to frame him into gags, something Spheeris acknowledged in an interview years after the fact. Ozzy and a few other veterans of the scene are not immune to metal culture’s innate ridiculousness (the movie’s biggest laugh for me was Spheeris’ deadpan reaction to Steven Tyler’s extended masturbation metaphor to describe the rock’n’roll lifestyle). It’s worth noting that Spheeris asked her subjects how they wanted to be filmed, leading to such choice setups as Gene Simmons in a lingerie store and Paul Stanley in a bed full of scantily clad models. (Lemmy allegedly took offense to how he was portrayed, claiming Spheeris shot him from afar to make him look stupid, but I don’t think he comes across badly. He’s low key and unassuming in a way that contrasts him from the other participants, at the very least in terms of appearance).

The structure of this entry is tighter, using snippets of different interviews to flesh out different ideas, exploring the decadence and excess of the music and the surrounding culture. We even hear from the anti-metal folks, particularly in one amusing scene where a woman describes the dangerous potential of metal fashion with the solemnity of a cop or anti-gun advocate describing illegal firearms. Performance footage is limited to brief excerpts, usually for comic relief (assless chaps and a limp attempt to set fire to a Soviet flag are highlights), although we do get an extended look at a sleazy stripping context. (The club owners featured seem as much into the metal lifestyle as some of the musicians and fans, in sharp contrast to the genial working class types featured in the first and third entries.) The most notorious segment of the film is the interview with Chris Holmes from W.A.S.P., who lounges in a pool in alcoholic self loathing, which probably went farther in deflating the excitement around the metal scene than any single moment. Yet like the first film, this one refuses to lock into too narrow view of its subject and rebounds with a Megadeth performance that goes a long way in showing that yes, this music can in fact be good. (I should say that I enjoy my share of hair metal, which Megadeth is decidedly not, but the songs earlier in the film don’t do the best job of selling the genre. Although anything would look lame with assless chaps.) This movie is more obviously flawed than the original, but I can’t help but kind of love it. The fact is that the metal musicians and fans, despite being somewhat boneheaded, are also full of good vibes and fun to hang around (more so than the self-serious punk fans in the original), and the movie is quite slick and stylish by documentary standards, which makes the film true to its subject matter in a a way. I mean, you open the movie with Motorhead and I’m half won over already, and I haven’t stopped thinking (and smiling) about it since I’ve seen it.

The good vibes don’t carry over to Part III, which follows a group of homeless gutter punks in L.A. around another decade later. Once again there’s a change in context and perspective, with Spheeris coming across as more compassionate and maternal. The musicians here offer a more sobering, grounded presence. The veterans here, Keith Morris and Rick Wilder, come across as survivors more than anything, particularly the latter with his skeletal, emaciated appearance. The music this time around is almost beside the point, although we do get the sense that it offers the main subjects one of their only sources of relief. Their stories are similar. Broken homes. Forced onto the streets. Substance abuse. The movie feels like extended versions of the Darby Crash scenes and the interviews from the original, but with the grim consequences covered in the final moments, and the film’s sense of despair is alleviated only by the compassion Spheeris brings to the material. I can’t see myself returning to this as readily as it’s more downbeat and less dynamic than the previous movies, but it is undeniably moving, and had a profound effect on Spheeris as well, who decided to become a foster parent after her experience making this movie.

#film #movie review #the decline of western civilization #the decline of western civilization part ii: the metal years #the decline of western civilization part iii #penelope spheeris

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hungnitan · 4 years

Text

ACT 10 FULL SUMMARY SPOILER

Read at your own risk + it’s good breather while waiting for Yaycupcake translation team lol

- Continuing the previous act, Reni explained for why he took care of Kusumi despite he doesn’t produce any script for GOD-za. It explicitly explained that Madoka started as ghostwriter around act 1, so GOD-za script before that... it’s Reni magic lol

- Mankai celebrating their victory in timeact WITH GOD-ZA ! Madoka and Misumi made up nicely, ShifutoHaruto-Mankai bonding time, and... Reni has joined the party ! PS : I love Shifuto-Sakoda Sakyo time there

- Reni portrait explained around the time he meet Hakkaku for last time, Hakkaku gave him his last script (to protected it from Kusumi’s plagiarism) and hope that his designed cast will play it someday. Reni tell him it’s impossible to do at that time since Reni still in tight with Mankai Co and Yukio diseappearance The cast are Reni, Yuzo and old leaders with Hiro as lead actor plus Yukio as director

- We have Yuzo portrait too ! He explained that Yukio still alive somewhere overseas and can’t comeback to Veludo bc certain circumstances and their script got plagiarism in Fleur award play by Kusumi (yeah again), while Hakkaku can’t let that annouced that’s why Yukio disappeared and tell Mankai not to participate in fleur award play

- Old Mankai leaders portaits ! Mostly same as prologue, added some dialogue + tell their old Mankai time Comment : Woah, I disgust myself for even doubt Syu loyalty to Mankai now, he’s second most loyal to Mankai (first is Hiro)

- Timeact with Old Mankai team ! Well, it’s just Yuzo reasoning to used Hakkaku last script and Hiro terribly want to act in Mankai theater. The theme is Genpei War as Hakkaku script wrote For timeact prizes, Yuzo want Juza for his workshop, Hiro want Mankai’s flag, Zen want Kamekichi for his show restaurant, Syu would stop paying their dorm bill, Reni want old Mankai tape Comment : You remember MatsukawaSakyo once said about dorm bill in season 1 prologue and we all thought it included in Mankai debt isn’t. In the end the one who pay is him bc he want to protected that place until Yukio comeback again

- For Old Mankai reunited play, the only problem need to solve is Kasumi. He pretty disheartening to do act again (for Yukio, Reni contacted him + trying to make up) The one who convinced Kasumi to joined the play is SAKUYA.

- LOVED every scene Old Mankai leaders talked about Kid Sakyo lol

- Syu just Hakkaku oshi with tsundere great grandpa traits , Zen helped Tenma recovered his confidence, Hiro jealous to Tenma bc his kid is Tenma fans, Kasumi become Sakuya oshi

- While ACT 9 play mostly smooth, ACT 10 had a high hurdle. Tenma just get his assed kick with Hiro, Tsuzuru with Syu, Masumi and Kumon can’t get a grasp with his character. Comment : it’s good thing, we saw Harugumi Natsugumi bonding... Every members play a great part despite didn’t appear in this play

- New Mankai cast : Tenma after heard that Hiro is Old Mankai lead actor, Tsuzuru after get harsh comment about his acting by Syu, Misumi want to show his act to his father and Madoka, Masumi as always want to show his best to director while the other two...just SpringSummer members remaining member suits the play (other unchoosen HaruNatsu members scared after think dorm bill in stakes lol)

- Despite old Mankai Co sudden break up, everyone already think their own ways like Kasumi confidence to act get lower to the point he want to quit, Yuzo planned to leave company after Fleur award to do his own theater like Reni, Zen think to open his own show restaurant but just can’t made up his mind until Yukio leave

- Timeact Old vs New is live streaming ! Since most old members + Tenma name are big enough to made Mankai theater overload in no time...

- Old Mankai sad play !!! Since their VA mostly veteran, so the play really transmitted painfully good. I would love to see their play again someday

Syu really manly in that play ! and look at the beautifulness of Juli woman role~ lol

- We’re all know who’s winner, so they received prizes from old leaders. HAKKAKU UNFINISHED SCRIPT “MANKAI KOUEN” (Mankai Show) with all old member as cast in mind ! Yup, everyone. So with the script in new Mankai now, means we gonna see 24 MEMBERS IN ONE PLAY TOGETHER SOMEDAY ! (my best guess will be their Fleur award though still long long way to go)

- Finally our mc contacted by his father !!!

- FINAL BOSS APPEARED AT LAST. still unknown name and sprite but his VA is Miyamoto Mitsuru (expert handling antagonist characters lol)

- In the end, old leaders joined the party !

- Possible scene at later ACT : Final boss will make his move, Zen Omi talked about Nachi, detail reason Yukio and Hakkaku got treatened

Means we gonna get another spoiler, PV and prologue in month

PLAY : Moreless as I expected except it’s really full of comedy and happy end. I even forgot they acted Yoshitsune play sometimes. While as always Misumi different personality amaze me but I didn’t think Masumi can take cheerful younger brother tsukkomi role... plus wow I didn’t expect Chikage as Yoritomo (he’s true beauty there lol)

SONG : It’s morelike Kikyo no Hana type, but tbh I don’t really like it...it can’t be helped since it’s warring state song

OVERALL PLAY : I guess it’s their own way to balancing the ACT story, since Old Mankai into sad tragedy play (yeah, old Mankai MUST sad one, since it’s their reunion play). Overall, it’s good way to tell Yoshitsune in different side of story~

CG EXPLANATION :

Hiro and Tenma checking their drama scene together, fyi there’s unseen spark between them (lol)

Masumi Misumi bonding for Masumi character role building. Since he don’t know younger brother feels like, he asked Misumi as he had Madoka. In the end, Misumi asked Masumi to fold paper plane together (PS : I really love the cheerfulness from this CG aside it’s just normal scene)

Sakuya try convinced Kasumi to join the timeact. After doing etude and talked about past together, Kasumi finally agreed to joined and he crying there (if you can see it)

Zahra cafe finally open ! Everyone + old members gathering there after timeact. It’s good they use that place as CG since onward it use as gathering place

My personal comment : I enjoyed ACT 9 more overall. Some episode in ACT 10 pretty boring to me (after celebrating timeact victory with GOD-za and before old Mankai announced timeact). Even ACT 9 play and song better than this, but yeah old mankai team banter really good~

So with ACT 3 1/2 Ever lasting finished and gone into 2/2 Full Blooming, we only had Sakuya Itaru Citron (Haru), Yuki Muku Kazu (Natsu), Banri Juza Sakyo (Aki) and Hisoka Homare Azuma (Fuyu).

If we used 1/2 patterns, it definitely sure the next one is Banri team with AkiNatsu team and last is Sakuya team with HaruFuyu team

Well, BanriKazu or BanriYuki will be funny in many ways but BanriMuku too if they use Muku as woman role will be great (lately Muku keep getting female role). For Sakuya... I don’t think anyone will be great chemistry to him but I would love to see SakuyaAzuma or SakuyaHisoka

#a3!#a3! act! addict! actors!

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missorgana · 4 years

Text

coffee with an old friend

pairing: finn/poe dameron, background rey/rose tico

fandom: star wars (sequel trilogy)

rating: teen and up

word count: 6420

warning: swearing

summary: This gap year was supposed to be uneventful. Free of stumbling into his childhood friend slash man of his dreams, at least, but it seems like Finn's waking up to a surprise every day now. (coffee shop au + childhood friends)

(after being stuck on this in 3 months, i’m back!! i’m not too happy with the ending tbh but,, i just want it done and i miss them a lot. this isn’t beta read so all mistakes are my own! really hope you all enjoy this!!)

read on ao3

Finn’s missed London.

He only landed a week ago, but the memories from his childhood are already creeping back into his mind.

He still knows these streets like the palm of his hand.

As much Finn loves California, it can’t really compare, now, standing in the misty afternoon, the rush of the stores very much going despite the weather.

It almost seems quiet now, upon his return. The fact that he thought this was crowded as a child is incredible.

He’s missed the kindness, as well as the blunt honesty of the British.

And, surprisingly, the smell of rain’s missed too.

It’s almost comforting.

Finn knows he can’t stand in the rain forever, though, and if there’s something London never gets enough of, it’s coffee shops.

So it’s only a five minute walk before he spots one, which he, oddly enough, doesn’t remember seeing here before. Must be newly opened.

And there’s plenty of tables available once Finn’s inside, only residents are people looking around his age, occupying their laptops with cappuccinos on the side.

And, figuring he’ll go for the usual ice latte, the queue it is. It’s only consisting of one person, really, so Finn’s not sure he can call it that.

Regardless, when it’s his turn, he quickly forgets that thought.

Because a man he hasn’t seen in years in standing behind the counter.

Finn’s mind goes back to video games and model planes and caramel apples and it’s almost as if he’s ten years old again.

Poe fucking Dameron.

He’s changed, so very much, but Finn’s a hundred percent certain it’s him.

The curly haired man in front of him takes a minute to register what’s happening, so he’s probably just as surprised as Finn himself.

His face morphs from cluelessness to a slightly open mouth to a smile that slowly grows.

“Poe?”

“Finn! Buddy!”

And Finn really can’t think about how that old pet name makes his stomach feel right now, cause a woman with a slightly loud child, standing behind him, tells him to “Hurry up, already!”

So, naturally, Finn apologizes while getting his order out. Poe looks disappointed.

Cut to two minutes later where his coffee is called, by another barista, cause Poe’s seemingly busy, and Finn shouldn’t instantly feel sad about that, but he does.

That is, until he notices the scribbles on the cup saying, I’m off in an hour and a half. Wait for me?

Finn should be looking for a job right now. Should let his parents know he’s back in town, they’ll probably give him a three course meal and convince him to stay forever.

But despite not having seen the man for four years, he still can’t say no to Poe Dameron. Damn him.

Which is why Finn sticks around, shuffling his playlists and texting Rey for a bit.

She’ll surely freak out when she hears about this.

He should really tell her, but he spots Poe getting rid of the apron and Finn figures he’ll call her in the evening.

The older man, only by two years, he reminds himself, sits down across from him.

Finn wants to stand up for a hug, but doesn’t.

He wants to hold the hand that’s placed on the table, but doesn’t.

Regardless, Poe looks beyond excited. He’s grown a scruffy beard, and it’s funny to see the long curls again.

Finn nearly cried when he had shaved it all off for the army, but his old friend doesn’t need to know that.

“Oh, man. Hey, I- well. When did you get back in town, buddy?” and his voice is a tad hoarse, but warm, and Finn’s stomach starts doing loops on itself from hearing it again.

He can’t really deny it, can he?

Ever since the sleepover the two had with Rey, when they were ten and Poe twelve, Finn’s had this feeling.

This feeling when the boy grabbed his hand and told him his parents could take them to Comic Con, and Finn’s young mind didn’t get it, then, but he did when he turned fourteen.

Sixteen year old Poe texted him a little past midnight and asked if he could come over, which is far from unusual for them, and the golden boy laid in his bean bag, concentrating hard on the ceiling, only to shift his gaze to Finn and tell him, “I think I’m gay.”

Two days later, Finn asked his mum what the difference between liking a girl and a boy is, and she smiled that knowing smile of hers, “Well, depends on the boy and the girl.”

And he can’t really claim he’s surprised that his childhood crush washes over him in full force, after only a couple of hours worth of reunion.

Fucking hell.

All the time he spent crying over Poe leaving for the military makes him feel utterly stupid.

He feels utterly stupid sitting here, across from the man he’s been in love with since his early teens, who is just as, if not more, beautiful as he was four years ago, can he just stop?

“A week ago.” Finn tells the older man, coughing as a way of possibly restraining the thoughts going through his head, about his friends’ hands, that must be unhealthy, “More importantly, when did you get back?”

And Poe turns his eyes to the table in a soft laugh, proceeding to rest his chin on his hands before replying, “A year ago, more or less.”

“You- what? Why didn’t I hear about this?” Finn asks, and immediately regrets.

He can’t say it’s not completely on him for their loss of contact.

Poe’s number’s still saved on his phone, no doubt, which has caused him many late night considerations of a confession call, just for the hell of it.

But, well, his friend became less frequent, too. Which is understandable, because he was a pilot in the fucking military.

Finn feels bad, and somehow Poe realises this, cause he grabs his hand over the table, “If you’re about to apologise for losing contact, save it, okay? Things like that happen, I don’t blame you.”

And now they’re holding hands, and god, stop it already, before Finn does something stupid, like kissing the man across from him.

Soon enough, Poe retracts his hand, without seeming fazed.

The phone pings for twentieth time, and Finn apologises, “It’s Rey.”

“Oh my god!” the other man exclaims, “How is she?”

And Finn has to smile, there’s so many updates from their lives, and he swears this fuzzy feeling he’s having needs to leave.

They’ve always been friends. Best friends.

The only thing in his entire life Finn haven’t told Poe about is this, something Rey’s encouraged him to do numerous times.

And maybe he should’ve, but he always thought his best friend too good for him, and even if he didn’t, the thought of getting rejected always kicked in when he was close to coming clean.

But what’s the point of it now?

Poe probably has a gorgeous, strong, strategic, interesting veteran boyfriend waiting for him at home.

If there was no chance when they were teenagers attached at the hip, how would there be any now?

“She’s great!” Finn finally tells him, storing all the emotions in the back of his mind for later, “Still in Paris, but she swore to me yesterday that she would book a flight now that I’m back.”

“Hold her to that. A reunion’s just what I need, buddy. My friends from the army are awesome, but I can’t help comparing them to you two, you know?”

Finn really hopes he isn’t blushing, but he’s feeling embarrassed, and warm.

Maybe he should feel bad about being satisfied about this, but he’s relieved, because Poe hasn’t replaced him. Or Rey. He never believed he would, but the fear was always present.

What Finn expects to be yet another text from the last member of their trio turns out to be one from his mum, and yeah, he should probably get going before she comes and gets him herself.

He doesn’t really want this to end. Let him reside in this blissful warmth, pretend his childhood crush’s actually returns his feelings, or something, okay?

“Sorry, Poe, it’s uh- it’s my mum,” Finn tells his friend with a chuckle, “I wanna catch up, but my mum also wanna catch up, so...”

“Of course! Don’t worry, buddy,” he tells him, and Finn takes a small happiness in the disappointed look Poe’s trying to hide, “You still have my number, right?”

And he doesn’t know if he should be embarrassed or hopeful right now, but Finn nods and his friend brightens up.

“Perfect. Still need to show you my pictures! Got loads of my plane- or well, the one I was assigned to…” Poe stumbles a bit on his words.

He’s always been confident, at least that’s how Finn always saw him as, smiles that may go to the cocky side after a couple drinks, hands rubbing his friends’ back when they’re nervous, this courage to always say what he means, even when it’s frowned upon.

Especially when it’s frowned upon.

But of course Finn, and Rey, saw the rare moments aside from that. The soft, the sad, the unknowing.

Before Poe Dameron announced his sexuality in the high school speaker system, he told Finn in the middle of the night, the light of his phone screen illuminating him, and a crack in his voice that he’ll deny if Finn ever brings it up.

“If you want to, that is!” the older man adds quickly, and Finn has to stop him with a nod, “Of course.”

And well, he can’t really postpone it anymore, which is why Finn stands up, and, because fuck it, goes in for a hug. Luckily, Poe seems just as willing.

He pats his older friend on the back a couple times for good measure, to distance himself from the way his stomach is clenching still.

And maybe, he hopes, it’ll stop affecting him the next time they meet. Maybe.

…

Today is Sunday.

In his childhood, this day always meant going to church, and well, as much as he respects his mother’s religion, he guesses he grew out of it.

Nowadays, Sunday is usually his assigned ‘do absolutely nothing day’, and has been since he turned sixteen.

Yet Finn somehow finds himself doing something. It’s tragic, really.

But Poe texted with the question of hey bud! you doing anything today?, followed by if you’re up for looking at pictures, you know. coffee on the house? ;), and he can’t exactly ignore Poe Dameron, can he?

After staring at the winky face emoticon for way longer than he should, like he hadn’t seen it a million times before, Finn decides to reply and make his way to where their reunion took place a week ago.

And boy, if he thought the coffee shop was empty then, it’s definitely void now.

Only two residents present, an old woman knitting, and a man possibly in his late thirties, typing away on a laptop like his life depends on it.

“Buddy!” Finn recognizes the exclaim, and gives his friend a wave.

And Poe is already sitting at a table, surprisingly.

A look to the counter reveals a blond barista, hair put up in two buns, apron sporting an abundance of colorful pins and, what he assumes is their business catchphrase, You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy coffee - and that’s pretty close.

Just like when they first reunited, Finn’s undivided attention is once again drawn to his childhood crush, smiling at him as if they hadn’t stopped calling each other for four years. Finn might as well have a permanent stomach ache by now.

“You’re off already?” he questions his friend, taking the seat across from him, where a iced latte was already placed for him.

That’s just a friendly gesture, right? Nothing more for Finn to overthink for the rest of his life.

Poe nods, “An hour ago. Kaydel needs some extra hours, anyway, so I’m getting off early.” and his curls bops as he gestures to the woman operating the coffee machines.

Today’s a bit warmer compared to the last time, Finn mentally notes. Perhaps their heating was broken before.

Not that he has time to freeze or sweat or anything similar when Poe’s in front of him, and Finn is absolutely embarrassed that his feelings are hitting him this hard.

After their first meeting three days ago, Finn called Rey, and of course, he can’t keep anything secret from her, so it was less than twenty minutes before she’d gotten the news out of him.

“Finn! You know what this means?!” she yelled to him, the surprised yelp sounding in the background, which he assumed belonged to her girlfriend, and, well.

Finn laughed to her, nervously, “That you’re coming back so we can have it like old times again?” and he could not help but think that Rey was rolling her eyes at him, all the way over in France.

He doesn’t doubt that Rey wants to see Poe again, but he also knows that she never let his childhood crush on their friend go.

“Well, duh,” she told him, then clicked her tongue, “Buuut now you can see him on a daily basis.”

And Finn had played dumb, don’t judge him, okay? That day was already a lot for his mind, and heart, to handle, so he needed a bit of distance from it all.

“Uh, I guess?”

“Finn.”

“What?”

“You still not going to tell him?”

“Tell him what?” he told her, with a smile creeping up, and he didn’t know how to interpret the laugh coming out of the speaker, but damn, he missed her.

Daily facetime and texting is great, of course, they never go a day without saying something to each other, at least once. But it’s been a year since he’s seen her in person, and she’s his best friend.

She was always the one who arranged the sleepovers in their school days, and Finn has to admit it, the study plan she made for him is immensely helpful. Rey has a way of being in control that Finn hasn’t mastered yet.

“You’re impossible.”

And honestly, he has to agree with her, cause now he’s drinking an iced latte, his heart beating a little too fast, while Poe shows him pictures. He tries hard not to think about which one, of the many people his friend tells him about, could be his boyfriend.

“So there’s Hux - that’s his last name, never would tell us his first name, weird guy - Jessika, Phasma, Snap, Zori and Kylo.” Poe’s listing names, pointing to the faces.

Finn can’t help but smile, watching Poe’s enthusiastic arm movement, looking at each photo with nostalgia, his voice smooth like honey.

He notices his leg jumping up and down, that’s always a thing he does when he’s excited and it used to drive Rey insane. Finn doesn’t mind it.

“Of course you don’t mind.” She would tell him, whenever he took Poe’s side in the argument about whether or not it was annoying, and each time he would desperately hide his blush, giving Rey an intense look until she laughed at him.

Finn knows she’d never say.

They’ve joked about it, they really have, but she would never betray his trust like that. They pinkie promised, anyway, so if Rey did let it slip, she’ll hear for it til the end of eternity.

Finn knows the reminiscing smile on Poe’s face, and he has to clear his throat to not let his thoughts drag him to overthinking all this, “I bet you miss them, now.”

Poe nods. “I do.”

He then shrugs, and Finn hasn’t given up on reading his friend, but it sure is getting harder.

“But also, spending every waking moment with the same group of people is well,” he laughs at himself, “It can put anyone on edge sometimes, you know? Especially cause there’s no way to be alone. Not really.”

All Finn can do is nod in silent agreement.

He can’t imagine how that must be. Hell, he thought a dorm room would be the worst living situation possible, before he headed to America.

And because those words touch him in an unexplainable way, and because Finn can’t ever keep his damn mouth shut can he, he lets the question, “Did you miss me?” out into their comfortable silence.

Finn’s curses himself immediately.

The dreamy man in front of him looks up with a smile, again, this smile that’s soft but also utterly charming. And now he’s biting his lip, and well, Finn doesn’t know how to interpret any of this.

Poe takes his hand across the table, but turns it so his knuckles are resting in his friend’s palm. “Goes without saying, buddy.”

And how in the world is this happening, how are they holding hands, again?

Finn cannot possibly say he hasn’t experience this kind of affection from Poe before, because, well, he has. Poe loved holding his hand, Rey’s too.

And he could never tell whether his friend was making it harder for him, or, if this touch was what Finn craved from him, even if they could never actually be a thing, then, at least, he’ll have this.

Honestly, it’s return is more or less making him unsure of how to breathe.

Unlike their previous meeting, Poe doesn’t draw back his hand immediately, maybe only a few seconds later, and Finn wishes he didn’t count the seconds, but he did.

Surely, Poe must be noticing his nerves? Or maybe, possibly, he thinks this is Finn’s natural state, around everyone.

He wishes he knew, and he knows he should be telling him then, like Rey says, but boy, it’s terrifying, the thought of just telling him about his seemingly forever lasting crush on his childhood friend after randomly stumbling upon him and barely knowing about his life now.

Finn must be deemed to suffer, he thinks. If his feelings haven’t faded away now, he has this nagging fear, that, maybe, it never will.

And he may have confessed his thoughts about Poe to Rey, but what he hasn’t told her about is the Valentine’s Day letter he may or may not have written and slipped into his best friend’s locker.

Yeah, it’s, just, listen, okay?

It was short and sweet, or at least, he liked to think that. His fifteen year old self had sat up till a way too late hour to finish it.

Guess you can say it wasn’t really a letter, because Finn liked music, and for a long time, he’s expressed himself easier way that way. So he may have put a list of songs that made him think of his friend. Is that cheesy?

Finn would be lying if he said he could clearly remember which he put down, it’s been so long, and truth be told, he might’ve desperately tried to wipe that memory, anyway.

He signed off as a ‘secret admirer’, obviously, because he’s read those romantic teen novels, and there’s no way he had… the guts? The bravery? He doesn’t really know, Finn just knew he would die if Poe knew it was him.

Rey’s said before he tends to exaggerate, but whatever.

And you might say, he made a move, right? Thing is, well, when Poe found it, he was over the moon. So, of course, he interrogated virtually every guy he knew. Except Finn, of course.

The reason why he is trying, so hard, to forget this tiny glimpse of hope is because someone took the honor for it. Yep, a real blow to his confidence, to be honest.

So Poe had a boyfriend for a while, which made Finn lose his mind even more, if that’s even possible. The relationship didn’t last long, though.

Lucky for Finn, Rey excitedly exclaimed at the time, except Finn still didn’t act.

He swears, he almost did, biking around the neighbourhood on a Sunday evening with nothing better to do, when Poe looked more beat down than he’s ever seen his friend before.

Apparently, whatever his name was, Finn genuinely doesn’t remember and it’s like it matters, really… anyway, this guy eventually confessed the letter wasn’t from him.

So this evening was one of only a handful occasions where Finn did most of the talking.

And he just couldn’t bear the older boy being quiet, so he shoved his feelings down for what felt like the millionth time and told him bad jokes until the smile he knew so well resurfaced.

It always does. He wishes Poe would smile forever.

Besides, even though this guy was a douche, at least to Finn, he wasn’t Poe’s best friend since before puberty. And that sealed the deal for him to never to do anything, no matter how many times their stubborn friend tells him it’s stupid.

God, are unrequited feelings always this painful? It’s the only one he’s ever had, to be fair.

Finally, after what seems like more than four years, the hand leaves his, and it’s flickering through the photographs again, delicately, and with so much care.

But he can’t help looking at Poe’s face, reminding himself of every feature he memorized so long ago, like his brain’s telling me they’re going to be pushed apart once more.

And Finn wills his friend to look at him, and he does. He always does, really.

And he wishes to know what’s going on in Poe’s head, and for all that is good hopes he doesn’t realise what’s going on in his own.

…

Rey is coming home.

Well, she’s going to visit, she said. Obviously, she’s still got her degree and work in France, and the apartment, it’s not like Finn’s expecting her to move back.

That would be kind of nice, in theory, wouldn’t it?

In the course of, Jesus, almost two months now, things have been pushing Finn out of his new routine, things that were once part of it

He’s moved back into his parents’ basement, and honestly, this gap year was supposed to be relatively uneventful, it really was.

Free of stumbling into his childhood friend slash man of his dreams, at least, but it seems like he’s waking up to a surprise every day now.

Finn really can’t deny that Poe’s stressing him out. And making him nervous. Maybe a bit giddy, shut up.

His stomach aches every time he sees him, and it's always in the coffee shop, so sometimes, Finn allows himself to imagine them as dates because he's pining, okay?

It’s this constant reminder that Poe, well, he just exists in the same space right now, and his stupid texts with winky faces, and maybe, he’s drinking too much coffee now, too.

Poe’s always got his order ready now, and this act has a domestic tone to it that Finn’s not really willing himself to think anymore about.

He always thought he was missing something, as stupid and cheesy as it sounds.

It’s his dream school, of course, and his friends are wonderful, and his ex-girlfriend, still very good friend, Jannah, is close to his heart, too.

But Poe just fits, you know? And Rey too.

Growing up, he had many worries in his life, but at the end of the day, he always knew he could fall back on the two.

It’s like when he got drunk for the first time and his two friends were there with their overly caring, which he really can’t blame them for, because when it happened to Rey, he was there, too, obviously.

It goes without saying.

And Poe always squeezes on his heart, just a tiny, tiny bit every time he sees him, and it’s just a daunting realization that his friend may never know what he’s doing to him.

But Rey’s arriving today.

She called Finn before boarding, a conversation that went a little overtime and might consist of her almost begging him to just take his shot, as she said.

Her girlfriend’s coming too, and weirdly, this is both Poe and Finn’s first time ever meeting Rose.

Oh, in Rey and Finn’s more than weekly facetime he’s talked to her numerous times, but it’s not really the same, he thinks. It’s different being in the same room.

That’s what he learnt from these encounters with Poe, anyway.

And said man once again has invited Finn to coffee before they pick up the girls at the airport. He’s not even working today, good Lord.

So maybe, Finn’s been at Poe’s flat one time. It was just last week, actually.

It’s a small, humble one, and it just works for Poe, like, screams it in the wall art and the model plane he got on his fourteenth birthday that he’s, somehow, managed to keep intact all these years.

It’s the first thing Finn mentions, and his friend’s jokingly grumpy look when he laughs is just so endearing.

And that just took him back to their teenage hangouts, more than anything.

Poe wanted to show him more pictures, and boy, he had plenty of cardboard boxes piled up in a corner containing just that.

And it turned out, not only military time photographs, but old photo albums from before they were split up. A lot of them. The fact that Poe’s kept all of this jumbles up Finn’s insides, and his brain, to be honest.

“Welcome to the corner of shame.” he had said, with that deadpan expression he thinks is sort of menacing, like he’s about to tell a scary story, but honestly, it’s hard to take that serious.

Finn doesn’t say that, because despite them both making fun of each other loads of times, in this moment, it just makes him nostalgic.

If Rey were here, she would probably call him a loser or something, and Poe would stick out his tongue at her, because he’s not that great at comebacks, really.

He might be a bit infamous for starting conversation, arguments, whatever you call it, and not knowing how to finish them.

The fact that Finn finds even that endearing about him, well, he’s long gone.

But he’s known for years, because his other best friend loves to remind him.

Trust Finn when he says this, he’s seen every single photograph Poe owns, and that’s really the main reason they went to the flat, because there’s no humanly possible way he could carry all these to the coffee shop, but they ended up with a movie night because… yeah.

He would’ve stayed over, except that’s just about too much teenage sleepover memories for Finn to handle.

He also noticed the flat to be empty of other residents, except Poe’s dog, who instantly loved him, and his friend knows Finn will get close to tears near absolutely any dog, so. The postbox had only Dameron on it, too, not that he deliberately read on it, or anything.

But whatever, he’s sure Poe must have a boyfriend, somewhere. How could he not?

Perhaps he’s biased, but Finn’s sure there’s no aspect of his best friend that’s not lovable.

And the thing is, Poe’s confident, except when he’s not, like when he ended it with that guy who took the credit for Finn’s work, and for some reason, he started finding flaws to himself.

Listening to it clenched Finn’s heart in a different way than when his friend smiled at him, this was the sort of thing that made him want to curse the world, and that stupid guy, and prove Poe wrong in all this internalised criticism he has put on himself.

Regardless, Finn’s in the coffee shop, iced latte as usual, Poe’s drinking black coffee because he’s weird, and the conversation’s just swarming around being excited about the last part of their trio being on her way.

“You’ve talked to her girlfriend before, right?” Poe asks, biting his lip like he’s about to meet his partner’s parents, God, he is so likeable, why doesn’t he think that himself? Finn should remind him more often.

“Yeah,” he chuckles in his reply, “She’s so cool, honestly. Still weird to think of being in the same room as her. You know. Both of us existing.”

Finn shakes his head at himself, because he always does this with words, but Poe always smiles at him fondly, so even though it causes that familiar stomach ache, it’s worth it.

“I’ve missed this. You’re so deep.”

Their laughs are quiet and he has to say he feels like they’re meaningful. Or he doesn’t say it out loud, but you know what he means.

Thing is, Finn’s almost settled into this, like maybe he can see Poe again, everyday, and sure, he still feels just as strongly as before, but he’s learning to hide the nerves again.

Unfortunately, his best friend manages throw him out of the loop, once again.

Because suddenly Poe’s saying, “See this,” and Finn’s about to ask just how many photo albums he’s got laying around when what he pulls out is anything other than a photograph.

Remember that love letter Finn talked about before? It’s that damned thing Poe has in his hands now.

Firstly, it’s crumbled to oblivion, and he cannot believe his friend has it.

Can paper even, like, survive that long? Finn doesn’t really know.

He does know he feels like throwing up.

But he can’t really excuse himself, not only because this would blow this bottle up your feelings game Finn’s been playing for years now out of the water, but also, they’re supposed to be making their way to the airport soon.

Fuck. What is going on?

“You remember this?” his older friend inquires, turning the paper over in his hands, carefully, and honestly, it would probably return to dust if he didn’t.

How- Poe kept this stupid letter? Surely, Finn expected he’d have thrown it away, in a physical sense and in his mind, after that first breakup.

And Finn nods, swallowing the lump in his throat while the man in front of him continues, “It’s- I kept it in my jacket, even when I was the army.”

Finn knows exactly which jacket, because it’s also one probably too worn out but still being kept alive, multiple patches and stitches for as long as he can remember, “You did?”

It’s a small “Yeah,” he gets as a reply, and well, you already know how his smile makes Finn feel, “You know, I never found out who wrote it.”

And he just can’t reply, because Poe looks like he’s reminiscing, and Finn just wants this to be over. Can almost hear Rey’s encouraging, tired voice in the back of his mind.

“Sorry.” his friend then says, after the shortest silence, already folding the paper back together. Finn still can’t remember the songs, or if he wrote anything else.

Poe glances at the clock and mutters “shit” under his breath, and suddenly, the letter is put in his pocket where it came from, and whatever this moment was is over as quickly as it started.

And his friend gulps down the rest of his coffee in one go, yuck, and he rushes, and stresses, and Finn’s struggling to keep up.

Poe’s still got his hand in his pocket. That’s extremely inconvenient, especially with his bag, why is he doing this?

Finn wants to know just what his friend was thinking about when he brought that letter to light, because, well, God, it must mean something to him if he kept all this time.

It has to, right? What’s he supposed to do with this information?

And also, Finn doesn’t realise that he’s standing still until Poe’s voice sounds somehow a bit further away from him, it’s like he’s staring into nothing and not looking at his childhood best friend.

“What’s the matter?”

He zoned out, he’s zoning out.

It’s just- Finn doesn’t know what he’s trying to think of. All that’s going on in his head is Rey’s convinced mindset, telling him that Poe loves him, if that is platonic or romantic, it doesn’t matter.

He guesses Rey’s right. Maybe. That platonic only option is gonna hurt, though.

Poe’s coming closer again now, except it’s like Finn’s watching this going on outside his body, like a third person, or from above, maybe, and when his friend surely has to tell him they’re in a hurry again, it comes out of his mouth too choked up, too out of place and time for his liking, “I need to tell you something, Poe.”

And his older friend furrows his brow, of course, his stressful demeanor instead morphed to a frown of confusion, and despite of the world possibly crashing upon him this second, Finn continues, because fuck it, “I- I really hope you won’t look at me differently.”

Poe stands in silence for the shortest of the moments, mouth slightly agape, “Buddy, what are you talking about?”

Buddy. That should pretty much settle it, really. Their friendship will most likely put to the an end, or put in a hold, if he flees this.

At least Finn can tell Rey he tried. And say “I told you so,” might as well, now that he’s at it.

Which is why he squeezes his eyes shut for a second instead of looking at this man he knows so well, because well, he’s already distancing himself from everything right now, “It’s my letter, you know?”

And god, has the sound of traffic ever been so jarring.

Finn doesn’t even register the movement at first, he wonders where this is going, only he’s not the one moving, in fact every fiber of his being tenses up when Poe is suddenly as close to his face as they were in puberty.

The older man looks perpetually confused, honestly, Finn doesn’t blame him.

There’s a lot of blinking until, “Are you serious?”

“Yeah,” and you know Finn by now, his brain desperately tries to catch up to speed, throwing words out of his mouth in an unusual stutter, with no real meaning to the madness, luckily, Poe knows this stressed state of his, and a hand finds his shoulder.

It’s smoothing out his collar just a bit, his friend’s expression starting to change again, his eyes pleading to understand, “Finn, I need you to breathe.”

He does. They’re breathing the same air, always, he’s so acutely aware of it now than before.

Why has Poe even stopped him in explaining? He just needs to explain, despite there not being anything reasonable to say, because why does Finn feel the need to defend these feelings?

Maybe to soften inevitable blow, surely, Poe doesn’t even look fazed, actually, maybe he’s not shaken by it, that’s something.

“And I need you to tell me why Sweater Weather reminds you of me.”

“What?”

“Please?”

Oh, that comes back to him. Finn was far from prepared for a question like that, when a possible rejection was replaying until he might lose his mind.

He just shrugs, almost wanting to be outside his body so he can shove himself.

Why is Poe looking at him like that? It’s just that same smile. His eyes are soft now. His hand just gesturing a bit.

Finn recalls the feeling of hearing that song, but he’s not sure how to say it. It’s like, he can’t tell what his friend wants out of it. No matter what he says, it’ll probably be cheesy, but Finn was fifteen when he made the list, after all.

“I don’t know,” he says, shrugs again, they should probably be going, why is this lump in his throat getting bigger, “It’s like, when we were snowed in, when we watched Alien, you know? I freeze so easily, you know? And you make me warm.”

That’s what he wrote, the little note in the bottom. You make me warm. My heart beats too loud when you’re around. I wonder if you can hear it. I wonder if you know how easy it is to love you.

“I do?” and either Finn’s hallucinating right now, or Poe’s smiling even bigger.

“Yeah. It- it’s like home. I wished I could make you feel that way.”

Why not get everything out in the open now that they’re at it, huh. Poe’s looking at him, though. Like, really looking at him. There’s crinkles forming at his eyes, Finn wonders if they’ve always been there.

And his friend lets out a breath. What is going on-

“You think... would it be okay if I kissed you?”

Who the hell is Poe kidding, right now?

Finn doesn't if he wants to scream at the top of his lungs because this absurdity or because of this glee.

This year's really going way beyond his expectations already, and God forbid this moment ends, it seems way more like one of his daydreams than reality.

"You want to kiss me?" Finn asks, because it's hard to believe. It's almost like he should be banging his head against a wall for hiding this for so long.

Not that he knows if Poe's, well, wanted to kiss as long as he's wanted to kiss him.

"Buddy." he says, of course he says that, but now it's almost morphed into a new meaning, one where the classic, wonderous Poe smile is a smile of adoration, like a feeling that Finn might have overlooked it all the years they've known each other, for some reason, one that gives him goosebumps.

"Of course I do. That's the feeling I've never told you about. You make me feel that without even trying."

Well, of course Finn nods, of course, he cannot do anything else than believe him, because this is what, finally, eases his stomach and releases the chokehold on his breath.

This is what makes him study Poe's face and think to himself, is this how he looks when he looks at his friend?

It's like, the world's revolving around Poe, at this moment. To hell with it if that's already been said a million times before, Finn's saying it now.

Maybe Rey was right, not that he'll admit that to her today. Oh fuck, they should probably, actually, get going, shouldn't they?

He isn't eager to break this news to Poe, though, what with his chapped lips on his, and a warmth spreading from his cheeks all the way to his toes.

The buzzing of his phone can wait for another minute, right?

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kuriquinn · 4 years

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Dear Mr. Kuri, thank you so much for your recent post concerning the young artist who was effectively censored from sharing his/her/their art on a particular subject (just... so sad). I was hoping to get your thoughts on how adults might navigate interactions with minors in this space. Specifically, extending our support for their work w/out necessarily... engaging with them. I know this sounds crazy stupid but before tumblr I wasn't really active on any social media and I had no idea (cont'd)

there were so many users under the age of 16 on this site. I've even come to learn that some identified users I had interacted with early on were as young as 13, and as someone in my 30's - tbh that scared the shit out of me. I totally agree that someone that young and impressionable would be crushed by the kind of criticism that poor artist faced, and would likely never create or share again... to their detriment. The thing is though, I feel really hesitant following any creator (cont'd)

that isn't 18 or older... What are your thoughts on following/reblogging/interacting with minors in fandom? I fully agree that they need support, especially from older users who don't care what some stranger on the internet has to say... but I just feel... like I don't know how to go about that the right way. I really REALLY don't want minors on my blog at all... sorry to bother you with this, just wondering how you'd suggest handling this. I didn't comment on the post bc I didn't (cont'd)

want to risk that young artist reading my inquiry and feeling even more alienated. As always, thank you for your time and insight. - Birk

I may go a bit off-topic here, but let me give this a try:

I think in, In the end, it all comes down to communication and mutual respect.

Adults have this pervading mentality that until a child hits 18, they need to be infantilized and sheltered, but once they pass that magical number, then it’s a free for all. So, for eighteen years, it’s all about sticking a Potemkin village in front of any idea, person or situation that a child might find uncomfortable (read: they don’t like the feelings it gives them; very different from actual harmful ideas/persons/situations). Then, these sheltered almost-adults enter public spaces and expect society to keep doing that…when it turns out that’s not how it works, they become toxic.

This is how poisonous movements like purity-culture develop online, or new fans who demonize older fans and adults as being perverts for enjoying the very same pastimes they have.

For those of us interacting with these people, the automatic reaction is to “cancel” that person, thereby alienating and isolating them even more in their bad behavior. Instead of taking the time to talk with and try to show them through actions that the world isn’t limited to what they know.

As adults in fandom, we know that a large majority of the fandom is younger, because we were them once. We were that 12-year-old discovering fanfiction existed or sharing drawings we made of our original Harry Potter characters or quoting our favorite movies and televisions ad infinite. We got shit for it in real life, so we had to create spaces of our own online.

We, in effect, built fandom so that it would be more welcoming for the generations that came after us. And while a lot of us stick to that unwritten knowledge, as the years pass, a lot more become gatekeepers. They set a standard of what a fan must know or do to be considered a “real” fan, and they’re mean about how they do that.

Is it any wonder that new fans coming in experience this behavior and then jump on the “adults in fandom is creepy” bandwagon?

These new fans coming in, especially tweens and teens, they still live in this false reality where they only get to enjoy themselves and be kids for a limited amount of time, and once they Become Adult they have to give it all up—and can’t figure out why all those old creeps online are still a part of such “childish” things.

That fault lies squarely on our society, which pushes kids from a young age to be thinking of what they want to do when they grow up so they can get out there and start producing, producing, producing for the state and becoming a “useful” member of society.

We as fandom veterans, need to do our best to teach them differently, and that comes right back to my point: communication and mutual respect.

Older fans need to respect newcomers, as much as the new baby fans need to learn to respect their fandom elders. There is no maximum age for fandom; there’s no minimum age, either, although the younger the fan, the more their parents should be keeping an eye out for the truly damaging stuff and teaching their kids how to avoid that stuff on their own.

Now, obviously, people don’t always announce online how old they are (though it does happen more frequently now than when I started writing), but regardless, there should be a certain etiquette to it.

When you interact with someone online, you don’t know if they are 15 or 50. And the way you interact with them shouldn’t change based on knowing their age. We should maintain the same level of respect for the new fans as the older fans.

So, as to how adults might navigate interactions with minors (especially when you know they’re minors)?

Treat them as any other intelligent human being: with respect.

Because how else are they going to learn?

My mom always used to say to us, “I’m not raising children, I’m raising adults,” which basically meant she was teaching us how to be adults. Kids don’t pop out of the womb magically knowing how to interact with the world, they take their cues from the adults that are already there.

Fandom babies learn how to be active participants in fandom from the people who are already there. And they’re more likely to listen to and look up to someone that treats them as a mature and capable being, than someone who dismisses them as too young or too green, or dismisses their knowledge and experience because they haven’t earned their metaphorical stripes.

Remember, a lot of these kids are coming to fandom because they need an outlet. In this age of helicopter parents, this is the only place where they get to be treated as an individual adult-in-the-making instead of the overly protected child or student that must be shielded from the world. A lot of them are trying to figure out how to deal with the horrors that happen to them or around them every day. That 16-year-old girl writing a rape/non-con fic under a pseudonym? She could be exorcising her own demons through the only way she has because no one in her life is listening to her. That 14-year-old writing about homelessness might know more about it than someone twice his age.

Expertise and experience knows no age, and as adults, we need to not fall into the trap of thinking it does. There are some kids out there that have seen and endured more than I can even imagine.

In recent years, there’s been this trend of treating kids like sexless beings until we, the adults, deem them capable of having a sense of sexuality. When the reality is, once kids start puberty, they’re developing that sexuality, and are trying to figure out what it means to them and how to navigate it, and the world. It doesn’t matter if adults are uncomfortable with it, this is what our human biology has decided for us.

And chances are, as much as adults try to curate the world and keep kids from seeing the darker, less safe stuff? They’re already doing it. I saw this when I was teaching, the kids are already accessing and interacting with stuff like sex, drugs, relationships… Whenever a faceless censor tries to block that sort of thing, they find a way around it. Humans are funny like that—we want the things that are kept away from us, whether harmful or not.

It’s our responsibility to help them think critically about what they’re seeing, and teach them to express themselves about it in a respectful manner.

So by all means: follow that amazing artist even if they are only 15. Their age doesn’t negate the fact that they have talent that needs to be nurtured and encouraged. Reblog the images and the fics that strike you, even if you find out the person writing it isn’t 18 yet. Send a shoutout via DM or review or comment to someone that you admire whether you know they’re age or not.

Unless you’re being actively creepy and offensive (and seriously, don’t do that, it’s gross whether the recipient is a minor or not), chances are these creators are desperate for some assurance that the medium they choose to express themselves in is having an effect on people—and that they have the power to make even adults sit up and listen.

So…TL;DR:

When interacting with younger fans, do so with respect. And if they say something problematic, don’t automatically cancel them and write them off as “obviously too young and immature to understand”. They understand more than you think and will seek out their interests whether adults think it’s appropriate or not. That’s how freedom works. But if we’re going to nip bad behavior like purity culture and agism in the bud, we need to start by treating minors in fandom as adults developing their worldview, not as infants to be sheltered.

#longpost #asks #fandom #content creators #content consumers #reading #writing #online etiquette

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