My 2021 Fic Fests

Thank you @cyantific and @chloehl10 for tagging me to share the fic fests I was part of in 2021! I'm not a huge fest participant, mainly because I don't like signing up for things I might not be able to complete and I don't like pressure, but I did a couple!

Number of fests: 2

Number of fics written: 3

Favourite fest/fic: I only did 1D Trick or Treat Fest and the 1D Christmas fest, but I loved that in both I was able to decide to join in late on (Trick or Treat with no sign-ups and Christmas with the late call for more stories), which really suits me and my writing system (i.e., there is no system. Whatever comes out comes out, whenever it wants). I also like all the stories I wrote in different ways. If I had to pick one, I’d say Little Saint Nick, because it was barely a spark of an idea and then it snowballed (heh) as I sat down to try it out.

Fests you would love to do again this year (if they come back!): I’d do both of these again! The Trick or Treat fest is a great writing exercise with the 666 word limit, and who doesn’t love a Christmassy fic? I’ve also signed up for big bang, and I'd love to do the poly fic fest but I don’t think I’m going to make the Jan 30th deadline as I really should concentrate on the BB at this point… Wordplay last year looked fun as well. HOWEVER I have a list as long as my arm of projects I’m writing/want to write, so I do like if I can use something in-progress to fit the fest instead of following prompts and ending up with even more WIPs.

@cyantific added in Fic Fest you wish existed and I love that idea - although I note they're hoping to run their fest and I don’t have the capacity at this point to take on something like that! Fic fest mods are heroes. However, I would love more fests that focus on non-Larry. I love Larry, don’t get me wrong (my BB will be Larry!), but I think people need less encouragement for Larry fics, with their guaranteed readership. As a rare pair reader, rare pair-focused stories are also harder to find (unless you use ‘otp: true’ on AO3, or exclude all the Larry fics - but that’s almost useless for Ziam given how often Ziam and Larry go hand in hand) so a collection is like hitting jackpot. My personal favourites are Lilo, Tomlinshaw and Nouis, because I’m a Louis girl, so any of those three… well, I’d certainly consider selling my soul even if I didn’t go through with it.

My fics below the cut…

My contribution to fests in 2021: (In chronological order)

1. 1D Trick or Treat fest - Ghostbesties (Zayn and Louis) @1dtrickortreatfest

I had this idea kicking around and when I saw the fest it was the perfect excuse to finish it and keep it concise! It took a lot of revision to stick to 666 words but it was really interesting to work within such a constraint. And the reception to fics in this fest was amazing, even for my little gen fic. So many comments and kudos! I love.

2. 1D Christmas Fest - A Kiss for Christmas (Lilo) @1dchristmasfest

I saw the late call for stories for this fest and figured I’d give writing something short and sweet a go, and this was the result. It’s a weird mix of Louis’ vaguely horny internal monologue, childhood toys, and Liam as the son of Father Christmas. I don’t know. I don’t know where it came from but I honestly love it. Also I think(?) there were four non-Larry main pairings in this fest, and I wrote two of them, so happy to help with that variety :D

3. 1D Christmas Fest - Little Saint Nick (Tomlinshaw) @1dchristmasfest

I kind of didn’t mean to write this (I wasn’t even sure if the fest accepted multiple stories by the same author at the time) but a tiny half idea became this whole big thing (nearly 11k! That wasn’t the plan!) when I sat down and figured I’d give it half an hour to see if it had legs. It has canon Nick but AU Louis, supernatural elements and touches on some darker themes, and writing it was a real adventure. And I just realised they end up talking about sheep again, like they do in one of my other Tomlinshaw fics… why do I associate Tomlinshaw with sheep?!?

An absolutely huge thank you to everyone who organised a fest last year for encouraging the production of so many great stories! As a writer, I loved dipping my toe into fests, and as a reader I threw myself in wholeheartedly, so thank you for the hours of entertainment.

I feel like I’m getting to this a bit late, so probably most people have been tagged? If not, consider this yours!

Infinity War (7)

CHAPTER 7: GHOSTS

Loki & The Avengers

Summary: A work inspired by @queencfthestarsdrfoster ‘s post of the universe where Loki is alive and Thor is avenged.

Series: Will contain all- and more- that we saw in Infinity War. Will not contain smut and fluff for obvious reasons. Might contain weird humor though.

Chapter content: time to face the truth

Warnings: talk about the past

Word count: these weird dreams are getting weirder by the day

MASTERLIST & Taglist in bio, my love

"Why is he looking at me like that?" "You could have gotten a much better look if this one put in a little effort in the...aesthetic part of his armour suits. And face" Vision feels his head jerk back while he narrows his eyes at the new person standing in the room as if he owns it; him and Tony Stark. There is not even a flutter in Loki's emotions when he makes that comment but the young scientist who is analysing the internal nodal connections inside Vision is having a gala time as she watches this go down. "I am not even going to acknowledge that with a comment," Tony states as he tries he best to stand still while the Wakandan doctors work with the vibranium beads to help the man heal his wounds. "Because you know he's ugly," Loki quips and Shuri cannot help but swing her neck to catch Tony lick his lips and shift his weight between his legs.

"Quite bold coming from you." This voice is new for Loki. So is the red hair that flows around the face seemingly carrying the weight of an entire world in her eyes. And there it is! The glare that Loki is more familiar with than his own name. "Did I hurt someone from your family too?" the voice carries a hint of tiredness yet the sharpness of the God is not lost in those words. Bruce adjusts his glasses over his nose as his eyes roll and turn to Loki. The stern words pleading him to stop for a breather seem to take a pause on the scientist's lips when he witnesses the view unfolding in front of him and others. Red and green plasmic waves float around the two magicians without either of them moving a limb. The colours seem to mingle at one point before they trace a path to the other being and try their best to find and opening. It is not as much a fight to dominate as it is a challenge to find out who is strong enough to let the other one in. "Wanda," a prayer leaves Vision's lips in concern for his love but Tony is quick to raise his hand enough to let everyone in the room know they better not intervene. Not yet. If they had not known Loki as they do, it would have seemed like an ethereal dance of two energies. And a dance it was. Loki's green waves hopped and jumped around Wanda's red akin to two plasmic entities playing tag with each other, wanting to wait it out. Now some would say great minds think alike while others can state that it wasn't as much of the minds as the hearts that making the decision today; for both Loki and Wanda let their guard down at the same time, entering each other's sacred grounds to find a piece to take with them. "Wanda," a concerned yet authoritative call comes from the other end of the room. A single tear falls off those pale and tired skins as the sole evidence of the exchange before their powers dissipate and let the room breathe. "Well, well," Loki is the first to compose himself, straightening his back while bringing his arms behind as he turns to face his favourite boy. "if it isn't the earth's mightiest hero." "Consistent? Sure. Mightiest? Ehh," Tony mutters before looking anywhere but at Captain America. Well, at least that is what he thinks he will do till his eyes catch of glimpse and then come back to properly settle on the nomad look Steve Rogers chose for his time away. Steve's brooding brows do not leave the God for a second, nor do they fluster when Steve walks down the steps towards him, clearing the atmosphere of any misunderstandings about who is in charge- to which Shuri simply rolls her eyes and fires up her system. "Not want to be a part of the sausage fest, thank you," she mutters and gets to work. Peter seems torn between helping her out- as an excuse to see her lab- and witnessing Steve Rogers and Loki go down before his mentor's piercing gaze tells him he is better off with Shuri any damn day. "I told you we would meet again, Captain," Loki smirks at Steve and bows a little. "The honour is mine as always." "You are alive right now because Bruce has put his faith in you." "I haven't killed myself yet just for having a chance to meet you." Ignoring the gasps and groans in the background Loki takes a step towards the Captain. "If you doubt me-" he raises his arms in the air as a sign to have let his guard down- "strip me away of my power and use my weakness as you may." He looks at Wanda to let Steve follow his gaze. Wanda is standing next to Vision now, trying to gravitate herself with the support of the nearest table under her wavering hands. With one satiating deep breath, she finds her ground and focuses her eyes back to the present, thanking the wide glass walls to let the Wakandan sun and greens for their part. The sternness Steve has for Loki melts the second he turns to Wanda. The shift pinches Loki but he reduces it to just another jab and waits patiently for Wanda to say her peace. Wanda brings forward her hand and lets Steve rest his palm in hers. The moment their hands touch, a sting of her pulsating power can be seen reflecting right in Steve's irises as red embers glowing intensely for a second before disappearing into the darkness they came from. Loki has seen that look before. The very look he carried when learned the truths about the world around his. He can see the similar fear-laced question in those galactic eyes of Steve Rogers as well.  The question isn't carried in words but in the shallow breaths his lungs take in and out repeatedly till they are balanced enough to take grasp of the reality. Bucky- who has been standing in the corner of the room- takes a step towards Steve only to be stopped by Sam. "He's fine," the soldier whispers while gesturing with a nod towards an equally concerned Tony who pats the Captain's back before soothing it. "You okay there, Cap?" His voice has nothing but concern for his friend in this passing moment. Everything is in the past for now. For now. Fingerless gloved hands get hold of Tony's arms and this is the second when Tony realises that Steve isn't shivering under the cloud of fear, not is he panicking under any dark spells. He is standing there with his brows constricted in a serious thought while his pupils are trying to refocus from infinity. The entire hall is silent, waiting for Steve something and yet patient enough to let him take his time. And he finally raises his head to turn towards Loki with a look no one in the room could expect. "Thanos." The word itself carries a firm note and the weight in Captain's voice can tell Loki how much this man has already understood. No wonder he is my favourite. "He is the reason behind-" "Everything." Loki walks towards Vision and stands next to him- right in the centre- to let his magic display the knowledge which is lost upon the rest of the audience. The plasmic waves form four stones in his palm with a glow akin to their original spirit. "He is the reason the universe has not known peace because of his hunger for these. And the two that are here on earth." "How many does he have right now?" Sam asks the question everyone wants to talk about. "He has Space, Power and Reality." "So we have Vision's third eye and Doctor's necklace. There's still one missing. Not to mention the crippling doubt of whether we will be able to win with two pebbles." Loki comes to stand by the glass wall overlooking the grassland spread till the mountains by the horizon. The sun rays feel calming on his skin when he closes his eyes to breathe in the peace for a second. "There is one thing that Thanos has a firm belief in; so deep and blind that even the flip of this universe will not tether that belief. The belief of being the righteous person who can set everything on its true course. Anything that does not flow as he chooses must be cleared away. He claims himself to be a God that can set the balance. The saint of saints." Opening his eyes, he turns around to face the crowd immersed in those words that have been wanting to flow for a century now. "The only mistake this saint made was walking away without witnessing me die with his own eyes. So now, I will make him pay. I have a plan. And that plan has all of you." Steve, rerunning his words in his mind while his eyes rest on the ground and his thumbs in his belt loops, wonders out loud, "And why should we trust you?" Bruce shifts where he stands, wanting to say something. "I once told my brother to trust my rage-" Loki looks down at his right hand reflecting the scars- "I now ask of you the same-" his eyes mapping the ones from this morning before turning back to the humans- "trust my rage. Trust that I will avenge my brother's death-" his plan to stay stoic is given away by the rapid blinks to wash away that dew trying to settle on the edge of his eyes- "and if need be, bring him back."

Everything has changed

Based on the VIP book A Very Scandalous Proposal (I recommend reading it if you have vip!) 

pairings: Ava Montjoy x Sophie Macdonald 

(based on chapter 6 and 7 but rewritten bc we shouldve gotten a kiss in chapter 7) 

You requested and I’ve delivered @thedaft1 I hope you enjoy! 

taglist: @thedaft1 @cloud9in (idk any Ava Montjoy stans but if I do write more for her in the future and you wanna be tagged let me know 😊)

word count: 1.6k 

After asking Ava to stay with you for the night, platonically of course, you sit in comfortable silence, eyes glued to the tv screen, entranced by the show that’s playing. As you laugh along to the jokes, you see in your peripheral vision Ava sneaking glances at you, a hint of a smirk playing across her lips. You conspicuously try not to gaze at her, fixating your focus to the tv, but you begin to feel your cheeks burning as you recollect about the kiss you shared earlier, the very fake real kiss you shared in front of her friends. Considering how much you had to drink tonight, you barely remember what happened after but your mind lingers on the kiss, the way Ava’s lips felt against yours, how her tongue slipped into your mouth setting your entire body alight. How the intensity of the kiss left you feeling weak in the knees as her toned arms slipped around your waist, steadying you. Ava blamed it on the alcohol, presuming you had too much to drink but what she didn’t realise was how much of a physical impact the kiss had on you. How it had left you dizzy and craving more, but as your mind drifts off, assessing and analysing every moment of the kiss, Ava’s voice breaks you out of your trance and you clear your throat, wishing away all your unbridled thoughts about the Brit as she give you a small smile. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” 

You turn your head slightly to gaze at her, your body sobering up as the moments pass but you definitely still feel the alcohol in your system. “Just thinking.” 

“About?” You raise a playful eyebrow at her, “come darling, I’m your fiancee you should be able to share stuff with me.” And there it was, her absolutely infuriating but somehow incredibly charismatic personality shining through and you can’t help but laugh. 

“I guess I’m still embarrassed by tonight. I didn’t say anything out of order in front of your friends right?” Your voice is laced with a bit of insecurity as your gaze nervously burns into Ava’s. 

Ava gives a sinister grin that is anything but innocent. “Well…..I will say that you are a right cheeky bugger when you’ve had a proper chin wag.” 

“Ava, real english please.” You know you sound like a dumb American in this moment but after a few weeks you’re still trying to wrap your head around the absurdity that is British slang.

Ava lets out a small airy laugh, “god you’re so hopelessly American.” Her smile broadens, as she slightly shakes her head. “You tend to say some things which are quite barmy, while under the influence of alcohol.” 

You groan, your hand raises as you give yourself a physical and mental facepalm, “just rip it off like a band-aid, what did I say?” 

“Let’s just say you were very persistent in me taking you to bed,” Ava trails off her cheeks dusted red as you pointedly glances away from you, her eyes boring into the telly but not fully focused on the screen. 

“Oh god.” 

Ava turns back to you, her lips quirked into a toothy grin, “well you’ve already enticed me into your bed so I say you’ve done a bloody good job.: Her voice chirps with playfulness as her accent strengthens when pronouncing certain words and you feel as if you’ve fallen under her spell. What started off as an innocent agreement between the two of you is beginning to grow into something more, however you’re unsure if the feeling is unrequited or if Ava feels the same way. She leans forward slightly, her gaze slightly darkens as she takes you in, “I can’t exactly blame you, you’re not made out of stone. I know how…” she pauses, contemplating for a few seconds before giving you a devilish grin, “alluring I can be.” You facetiously swat at her arm, your cheeks reddening by the second. The sounds from the tv become a background noise as you stare intensely at her, all rational thoughts thrown out of the window as your gaze involuntarily darts down to her lips. Ava notices your wandering eyes and subconsciously runs her tongue along her bottom lip, the wetness of it glistening under the dim glare of the television. 

“Sophie,” your name leaves her lips in a low breathless manner, whether it’s a come on or a warning you’re still internally debating as you edge closer to her, but Ava retracts her gaze from yours pulling you out of the moment. 

“We have a busy day ahead of us tomorrow, we should get some sleep.” She shifts in the bed leaving a wide gap between the two of you which suddenly feels like a chasm. Hyper aware of the awkward shift in the atmosphere,  you cover up the look of disappointment flashing across your face with an exaggerated yawn before turning to face the other way. 

“Goodnight Sophie.” 

“Goodnight Ava.” You close your eyes and let the sleep that you tried so hard to subside earlier take you. 

…..

After spending the day researching for your book, you begin getting ready for dinner after Ava has promised to take you out to dinner after criticizing the lack of public exposure to your relationship. After indulging in a dinner, where you catch a glimpse of Ava’s hedonistic nature in the way in which she takes the reins, teaching you about the art of eating oysters she offers to take you to a small private club called Firefly. 

“I’d much rather entertain you somewhere more...intimate than regale this stuffy lot.” She holds out her hand which you cordially accept and as your hand slips into hers, she lifts it to her lips, gently pressing a kiss across your knuckles, sending shivers down your spine. Ava tenderly strokes her thumb over your knuckles, and you can’t help but feel the butterflies in your stomach even though you know it’s for show. 

Temporarily stunned, you’re at a loss for words as you take in the mischievous glint in Ava’s eyes. “I-,�� 

“Cat got your tongue?” Ava teases as her hand still remains on yours, her fingertips ghosting around your knuckles. 

Seeing the smug look on Ava’s face strengthens your resolve as you assertively raise an eyebrow before leaning in close to whisper, “I’d love to go.”

Ava breaks out into a wolfish grin, “Marvellous. I’ll just grab the check and then we will be on our way.” 

…. 

Ava leads you into a glamorous setting, the sultry old timey music washing over you as she leads you to a table near the front of the stage. 

“Ava, this place is beautiful. I feel like I’ve been catapulted back into the 1920s.” 

“Yes, Mitzie has always taken a liking to this place and I guess she has passed it down onto me. Whenever I feel like I need an escape, I like to come here and lose myself in the music.” 

You indulge in some more conversation with Ava in which she lets some juicy gossip about her grandmother being a lounge singer in this very place when she was younger, after making you promise not to add it to your book, fearing her wrath. A slow romantic song begins to play as couples begin drifting towards the dance floor. Ava holds out a hand, “indulge me?” You take her hand and let her lead you into the middle of floor. Her hands hang loosely around your waist while you find yourself doing the same with your arms around her neck. 

You dance in content silence for a few moments, but you feel Ava’s gaze boring into you as she softly speaks out, “I have to say Sophie, I’m… pleasantly surprised.” 

“About what?” 

“Everything I suppose. I know it must have not been easy when I propositioned you with the devil’s bargain so to say, but I have to say, this has been unexpectedly delightful.” You draw your head back, slightly started by Ava’s admission, catching an amorous glint in her eye which momentarily takes your breath away. 

“I-. I have to admit, this has been more enjoyable than I thought it would be. When you first approached me I thought you were a pompous, stuffy, self-centred upper crust girl.” 

“You wound me.” Ava brings a hand over her hand, exaggeratingly clutching at it before moving her hand back around to your waist, her hands gripping your hips slightly firmer than before. “So what do you think of me now?” You see a flicker of vulnerability in her eyes as her half-lidded gaze roams your facial features as if she’s searching for something. 

“Oh I still think you’re incredibly pompous,” your jesting tone elicits a few laughs from the Brit before she gleams languorously at you, “but you’ve been nothing but kind to me. Sometimes a giant pain in my ass but you’re different than what I expected.”

You feel a surge of adrenaline rush through you at the spike of your admittance as the air between the two of you suddenly feels dense, heavy with anticipation as you close the gap between the two of you, her soft plush lips easing into yours. You moan softly as your arms around Ava’s neck tighten, surging yourself against her. Your kiss grows warmer, as you explore the depths of her mouth, forgetting about the people around you. Unlike the kiss you shared last night, this one feels more authentic, as you begin to lose yourself in her. Ava pulls away as the music shifts into something more spirited and she rests her forehead against yours, her darkened eyes staring deeply into yours, as the feel of her lips still lingering on yours. 

As you glare into each other’s eyes you know that everything has changed. 

Trust in Me

This is my first Loki fic and I'm a little out of practice writing. If you guys could let me know if I should continue this story, I'd really appreciate it :)

Y/N had struggled with identity for a very long time; her own, the concept, the tags that came along with it. Identity became an imposition, something forced upon her rather than chosen for herself. Perhaps some context is necessary to explain why.

Y/N’s mother, Lia, had been what many would class as a socialite; the oldest daughter of a wealthy family, beautiful, intelligent. She had that sass that could be detected by the slight curve of her eyebrow. Despite her quick wit and sharp tongue, she was incredibly loving and doted on her family, which is why her ‘banishment’ had come as a surprise.

Lia’s little brother liked to stir the pot and annoy their father at any given moment. One of their father’s biggest grievances came from his son’s choice of best friend, Rafael. Rafael Tatum came from an aggressive family. Though he himself was calm and collected, his family’s erratic behaviour had given them quite the reputation, one that Lia’s family wanted nothing to do with.

Despite knowing her father’s distaste for the Tatums, Lia fell in love with her brother’s best friend. He was well read, well-travelled. Despite his strong build and withering stare, he believed in peace and discussion over war and violence. There weren’t many men like Rafael.

Lia respected her parents enough to tell them the truth, but when given the ultimatum of us or him, Lia chose him. She kept in contact with her brother, but after quickly eloping, she and Rafael moved to a house on the coast. Lia soon fell pregnant and she and Rafael raised their beautiful baby girl by the sea. But the Tatums had made many enemies at this point, and with Rafael and their daughter’s striking blonde hair and piercing grey eyes, they could not leave their home out of fear of attack.

Lia became ill when Y/N was nine, and after a lengthy battle for her life, Lia passed away peacefully in her sleep. Rafael knew his days were numbered, but the thought of leaving his little girl defenceless in the world sickened him; so, he called on his best friend, Lia’s brother.

On the day Rafael was killed, Lia’s brother scooped up his eleven-year-old niece into his arms and took her to his home where he would raise her.

He kept her hidden from those who would judge her, and safe from those who would harm her. He often joked that she was like Rapunzel, with her long golden hair locked away in a tower. Although she would laugh at the comparison, he wasn’t far off. Y/N did have locks like spun gold, and she did live in a tower; in fact, it was one of the highest towers in New York: Stark Tower, where she lived with the ever reliable Miss Potts and her fun uncle Tony.

  Despite what many would say about him, Tony was a good uncle to Y/N, and a strong father figure in her life. He kept her safe when she didn’t realise she was in danger, and he did so because he loved her, just as much as he had loved Lia.

Tony and Lia could have been twins with how in sync they were. Despite being her younger brother, Tony always felt like her equal. She always included him and helped him with his inventions. She encouraged his intelligence and scolded their father when he refused to shine a light on Tony’s brilliance. Perhaps that’s why he had befriended Rafael, there was so much of his sister’s goodness there, it was just in a different shade.

Rafael had been annoyed by Tony at first, his constant sarcasm and nature to provoke irritated Rafael to no end. Slowly these annoyances became endearing and the two, though an odd pairing, became a duo to be reckoned with. They went travelling around the world, exploring new cultures, and expanding their minds. Although Tony got them into trouble, Rafael was there to get them out of it.

When Y/N would ask Tony about her father, the story would often start something like “Did I ever tell you about that time your dad rescued me from falling off a pier?”

Y/N could have heard that story a thousand times but she’d gladly hear it a thousand more.

Tony never resented his sister for running away with his best friend. In fact, after years of her being the golden child, it was refreshing to see her let loose and follow her heart. His only regret was not having more time: more time to laugh with her, to sit with her, to watch her raise her little girl.

So when he promised Lia, on his last visit to her sick bed, that he would watch over her little girl, he took that promise to heart. And as such, every landmark moment in his life would be done with her in mind.

When Tony became Iron Man, he feared he had put an even bigger target on the poor girls back. But she just smiled up at him and called him her hero.

When he told her he loved Pepper and that he wanted her to move into the tower, Y/N simply looked at him with her mother’s signature curved brow and said “well it’s about time.”

When Tony asked what she thought of his new intern Peter Parker, she laughed and said, “I always wanted a little brother.”

They were in sync, they understood each other and looked out for one another. In all the tragedy that had befallen their family, they had made a family of their own. So, you can imagine how protective Tony was when introducing the avengers to his precious niece. Although Y/N was now eighteen and a young woman, Tony took his role of father-figure very seriously. He only introduced a member or two of the avengers at a time.

Natasha had been the first, followed swiftly by Bruce. After years of the introvert lifestyle and second-guessing people’s motives, Y/N had become very shy and quiet to everyone but her uncle. Bruce and Nat’s discretion and sensitivity allowed Y/N to warm to them.

Steve and Sam were polite and calm enough to allow Y/N to relax around them (Steve was always there to stop Sam from staring at Y/N and her “heart-warming smile” as he calls it). By the time Clint brought Wanda to the tower, Y/N was able to sit in the same room as everyone and eat dinner without feeling too uneasy.

Y/N liked everyone well enough, but like her father she enjoyed peace and discussion. During particularly rowdy dinners, she would often find herself sitting with Bucky and Vision in comfortable silence; the comfort this provided her allowed her to class them as her closer friends. But like her father, she needed one friend to find both annoyance and love, and she found that in the brotherly figure of Peter Parker.

Tony kept this system in place, slowly integrating people he trusted into Y/N’s life, allowing her to trust them for herself before pushing them into her life.

So when Friday announced the arrival of Thor and his war criminal brother on the lawn of Stark tower, Tony was far from pleased.

Home on the Range - Re-Review #47

Just a quick note to say, I know I am super behind on replying to everyone! I will aim to go and do that now! Thank you all so so much though, I really do appreciate it. Hopefully work will slow down in a bit and I can be a little more active here.

Anyhow, let’s move onto how awesome this little house is!

Of course International Rescue have a training zone. The Gecko Gloves sound pretty useful as well. Gordon could have done with them in ‘Weather or Not’.

“Maybe I should take the lead for a change?”

“Actually, that’s not a bad idea.”

“Hey- What are you doing? That’s not what I had in mind!”

“Me next!”

Of course they’re the sort of brother’s that work together to throw each other around. That little look between Scott and Virgil was priceless. They really are a dream team.

“MAX, go and shake things up a little bit.”

Key word there MAX being “little”, not deathly. Seriously, you nearly took out three brothers!

“I can’t! He’s out of control!”

And that is the harbinger of doom for this episode.

Virgil saving Scott like a good brother.

And I love how Gordon somehow managed to make it all the way to the top!

Also, maneuver 17? We haven’t heard of it before, but they know what it means, and good for it too or we might have been spending a full twenty-two minutes looking at this wall of death.

“What a lovely place! I can see why you come here every year.”

“Nice hof your Father, to build this little ‘ome haway from ‘ome.”

A perfect sentence to give to Parker.

“Actually the Ranch belonged to the boys Mother. It’s been in her family for generations.”

A hint of Lucille! How lovely.

You know when you turn the TV on and you’re sorely disappointed? Yeah, Gordon was the epitome of that!

“Uhh, it’s her again! How many times do they have to play this thing?”

Her being Kat Cavanough - reporter from ‘Falling Skies’.

And more hints of Lucille!

“Do you remember when Mom used to take us all horseback riding?”

“Especially when Gordon was facing the wrong way. I think there’s a picture here somewhere.”

“I don’t really have much to add to the conversation.”

This is such a sweet moment! Of course Alan is younger and doesn’t have the same memories. Must be hard though, to be surrounded by brother’s who can have a conversation you can’t join in with.

Alan going out to watch Shadows take off was adorable! I mean, this episode really felt like they were trying to push Kayo and Alan, but then... I don’t really know what happened with TAG love interest story lines, save Penelope and Gordon.

“Sherbet, wait here and... guard FAB One.”

I love how the guarding idea was an afterthought, but Bertie takes it seriously! Parker and Lady Penelope having hard hats as well was genius.

“Seems hare hintruder ‘as vanished hinto thin hair.”

And sit on a rock Parker... anyone else getting flashbacks to ‘Tunnels of Time’? Just don’t touch anything, Parker. Although he did help them to find Kat! Really, what was she trying to achieve, silly woman.

A full family team up! Here we go.

“Thunderbirds are- Oh come on!”

Best launch ever. Just putting it out there.

P.S. Don’t look so down Scott.

“So, if all our ships are grounded, how are we going to get to the rescue site?”

“Fortunately, we still have some vehicles that are completely self-contained.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me! We’re actually taking Dad’s old hoverbikes?”

“They’re like the oldest things in here.”

“If these get us where we need to go then they’re gonna be our new favourite rides.”

They took a bit of ‘Jeff Tracy Fixing’ but they did actually work!

“Thunderbirds are go.”

Sort of.

It’s the old hoverbikes! The original get-around vehicles of TOS, seen in a great many episodes! They look a bit worse for wear here though, but hey.

“Since EOS isn’t affected by the malfunctions, I’ve downloaded her to a local memory bank.”

John’s coding is superior! That is what this episode teaches us! He really could take over the world...

“Hello John. You’ll be pleased to know all systems on Thunderbird Five are operating normally.”

“That’s a relief. Now, I need you to do a full system sweep. Look for anything unusual in the Z-Band Network.”

“One anomaly detected.”

“Looks like one of the transmitter nodes has been modified.”

Brains telling John to stay put was one of the best calls anyone could have made. They could have really ended up with everything stuck.

Their jet packs work on tech? I thought they were self-contained, but okay, Virgil is the expert and I bow to his superior knowledge.

“You know who I am, don’t you?”

“Yeah I do. And we know what you’ve been saying about us.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t just leave me here to rot.”

“Right now, you’re someone in a tough spot who needs help. Who you are and what you’ve done doesn’t matter.”

Brilliant attitude Scott! Many people struggle to do that.

“The Mechanic! Wait, it could be a holographic drone.”

No such luck.

Parker actually taking apart FAB One! I never thought I’d see the day.

“You’re risking your life to save mine. All of you.”

“You know that’s what we do, right? It’s the Rescue part in International Rescue.”

“Even when I was out to ruin you?”

“I’ll try not to take that personally.”

No one would blame you if you did, Scott. Gordon (and probably Alan) would have if he was down there. And that rockfall must have hurt! It was a really good improvised rescue though considering they couldn’t get their proper equipment there.

“See that wasn’t too bad.”

“Easy for you to say little brother.”

“It’s a glitch in the security log.”

“Someone was covering their tracks!”

“And that someone is still here in the compound. Grandma went looking for Brains. They could both be walking into a trap. I have to warn them!”

“John, wait! Then you might get caught in it as well. Let me try something. There. I now have a subroutine nested in the transmitter room server.”

“Is Brains in the room?”

“Yes, but so is The Mechanic.”

“The Mechanic?”

We really should be worried by how easy that was for EOS (and John) to do.

“You’re trying to build a laser.”

“Not trying. I already have.

EOS’ message was a classic! That little Scooby-Do moment was hilarious.

“Short version, The Mechanic is here.”

Those faces! Well, I suppose that’s equal to or worse in a way than The Hood breaking into Tracy Island. It also means that both of their homes have been broken into. I thought Kayo was meant to be doing all the security stuff.

“Your former employer tried a similar tactic once. It didn’t work out very well for him either.”

This confrontation was one of the best scenes I’ve ever seen.

“You need to work on your intimidation techniques, Grandma.”

“First of all, only family get to call her that. And second, EOS we need to separate the machine from the man.”

“With pleasure.”

John going in with a super back-up plan was completely awesome. EOS is super dangerous. In ‘Earthbreaker’, The Mechanic got the better of her, but she’s definitely evolved in order to be able to put a stop to him in this episode. So, that begs the question, is there anything she cannot overcome? I really loved this episodes use of John and EOS tech, as well as Brains and MAX’s relationship, and the ever continuing Brains and Mechanic battle. Even Grandma got her moments!

“You’re not welcome here.”

“Oh MAX, you’re a hero!”

Question: how did they not realise The Mechanic’s ship was in there?

Moving on.

“If there’s anything you want to know about us, all you’ve got to do is ask.”

“Really? Anything?”

“Well there are somethings we have to keep secret. Otherwise people like The Hood and The Mechanic will use them in bad ways. There may be a lot of mystery around International Rescue, but really we’re just a regular family.”

“Hey, that’s my chair!”

“No it’s not! I was here first.”

Yeah, definitely just a regular family.

“You want to hear a real story? Let me tell you some of the things Gordon says in his sleep.”

“Oh no you don’t!”

“Watch the hair.”

“Come here!”

“Oh, you’re a lot stronger than you look, Fish-boy!”

And you know what, I agree that that’s as good as place to leave it as anything.  This is an absolutely amazing episode, definitely the peak of Series 2.

Wizards Hearts Recs: Cursed Object(s)

Wizards Hearts was a four-month-long Drarry reading fest. Players were given a playing deck of 52 tropes, and were asked to find 52 different fics to read and comment on to fill their decks. To prevent the same few fics from being read, fics were restricted to only being used for the game three times before being considered ineligible for further points. The tropes and submissions list can be found here.

Check out the masterlist of fics for this trope below the cut!

📜 Misdirection by lea_anberlyn Rated:  Teen and Up Words:  3764 Tags: Humor, Snarky!Malfoy, Epistolary Summary:  Harry buys a new owl after the war – a bird he soon realises is cursed to send letters to the person he hates most. Draco Malfoy finds the whole thing hilarious. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 your heart'll race, hard to sleep by orphan_account Rated:  Explicit Words:  3897 Tags: Insomnia, Curse Breaking, grumpy Draco, Humour, please think I'm funny, Blow Jobs, I have no chill and can't take things slow apparently Summary:  Draco's bed is cursed. Don't ask him about it. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Sucker by BasiliskCur, lefthandofglory Rated:  Explicit Words:  117917 Tags: Oral Sex, Anal Sex, Bottom Harry, Bottom Draco, Dubious Consent, Top Harry, Top Draco Malfoy, Twincest, Sharing a Bed, Contracts, Semi-Public Sex, Negotiations, Service, First Time, Masturbation, Dirty Talk, Brief instance of suicidal behavior, Smut, Eventual Angst with an even more Eventual Happy Ending, Because it's all fun and magic sex contracts until two former enemies, with a shit ton of emotional baggage, fall in love Summary:  Fred and George have discovered there used to be a dedicated cocksucker for each dorm. Now there's an interesting tradition that Hogwarts: A History somehow forgot to mention. Anyway. The twins. A magic sex contract. What's the worry? Poor Harry. He's killed Voldemort and is back at Hogwarts studying for NEWTs but he's still got to learn the two most important lessons of his life: 1. How to suck cock. 2. Always read the fine print. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 In Love With the Ferret by Pineau_noir Rated:  Explicit Words:  21936 Tags: Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Humor, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Awkward Flirting, Hurt/Comfort, But Mostly Comfort, Bellatrix isn't in the fic but her legacy lives on, Cursed objects, blink and you'll miss it case fic, so many songs from the '00s, Pining, Bad Puns, they all work at the ministry, Redeemed Draco Malfoy, a little girl gets cursed, but she's fine by the time Harry and Draco are called to the scene, NOTHING IS GRAPHIC, Song fic, because Draco loves Muggle music, Banter, giggly sex, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Harry mentions the time Luna gave him organic tea that got him high one time, Bottom Harry Potter, Top Draco Malfoy, sex magic because let's be honest, who wouldn't want to clean up with magic, oh yeah and there's scene where Harry's in the shower, wanking, If that's your thing - Freeform, Domestic Fluff, domestic drarry, SO, Domestic, Set in 2008, So book canon timeline, H/D Wireless 2020 Summary:  Harry has never been the most observant bloke. Sometimes to the point of him not realising his feelings for a particular pointy, pale git. And it's not his fault if literally everyone else knows about said feelings except for Harry and the git in question. So it's really not his fault, when faced with the scope of his feelings, he suddenly has a hard time talking to one Draco Malfoy. Or looking him in the eye. Or not being a total weirdo around him. There's nothing to do but take the advice of his friends and try to woo Draco over dinners with friends, Ministry cases, and an unfortunately named Italian restaurant. Harry just can't stop the flutter in his chest when he sees Draco smile. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 slipping through the cracks (of your cold embrace) by swisstae Rated:  Mature Words:  14406 Tags: Auror Draco Malfoy, Auror Harry Potter, Auror Partners, Established Relationship, Nightmares, Memory Magic, Cursed objects, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Therapy, Soft sex, Anal Sex, Misunderstandings, Arguments, nightmares being lived out, Heavy Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Feels, all the angst basically, Hopeful Ending, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, H/D Hurt!Fest 2020, Sectumsempra Scene | Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter's Duel in the Bathroom, Self Loathing Draco Malfoy, Spoilery Warning in End Notes, okay so this is just two silly bois who need to have a grown up conversation, considering they ARE grown-ups in this fic, cathartic crying can be found here Summary:  Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter. Archenemies at school, on opposite sides of the war that tore the Wizarding world in half -- and yet, lovers who overcame all odds to be together. That's where it all starts. And maybe, that's where it all ends. (in which Draco finds a cursed object, shit goes down, and everyone needs to talk about Feelings.) ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Gossip Boys by mypetelephant Rated:  Explicit Words:  24093 Tags: N/A Summary:  Confiscated Dark objects have been disappearing from the Ministry, and journalist Harry Potter is on the case. Unfortunately, he has to drag along Draco Malfoy, gossip columnist extraordinaire, whose subject of choice is everyone's favorite desultory hero. Forced to contend with cursed objects, international smugglers, and a lesson on the value of gossip, all Harry wants is to put out a respectable article. Oh, and to forget a night that only Draco knows and will never write about. Written for HD Career Fair 2012. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Paws of Fury by Veritas03 Rated:  Explicit Words:  87190 Tags: Male Slash, kitten fic, Mystery, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Romance, Complete Summary:  "Bellow, bluster… your rage is insignificant. No more than the mewing of a kitten. Do not be afraid. He will save you. Calm you. Love you." Harry has a furry little problem – but Draco’s scent soothes the savage beastie. Will Draco be able to save him when Harry’s world begins to crumble? Bubbles, blowjobs, mystery – and something rotten in the place of Grimmauld. Yes, yes - it's a Kitten!Harry fic. I know what you’re thinking - but it was there and I had to get it out of my system. Give it a chance. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Love It or List It by bangyababy Rated:  Explicit Words:  13767 Tags: Grimmauld Place, Renovations, Fuck Or Die, Forced Proximity, bed sharing, Top Draco Malfoy, Bottom Harry Potter, Praise Kink, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Angst, Feelings, carefree Draco Malfoy, Slow Burn, A Time Skip Summary:  Draco Malfoy has been mysteriously hired to renovate Grimmauld Place. Harry Potter has nothing better to do since leaving the Aurors. Throw in an ancient ceremonial vase, a neglected (and magical house), loneliness, and you've got the beginnings of a beautiful relationship. That is if they (or the house) don't kill each other first. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Out of the Woods by Janieohio Rated:  Teen and Up Words:  34987 Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Post-Hogwarts, POV Alternating, Eventual Romance, Fluff and Humor, Humor, Background Relationships, supportive friends, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Redeemed Draco Malfoy, Mind Healer Harry Potter, Shop Owner Draco Malfoy, Draco Malfoy in the Muggle World, Harry Potter Raises Teddy Lupin, Sassy Harry Potter, Sarcastic Draco Malfoy, Minor Violence, Minor Injuries, Mystery, Adventure, Adventure & Romance, Cute Teddy Lupin, Misunderstandings, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Explicit Language, Yoga, Into the Woods References, Therapy, Custody Issues, Minor Character Death, Minor Character Engagement, Dismissive Attitudes about Mental Illness, Childhood Trauma, Fae & Fairies, Brothers Grimm, Fairy Tale Elements - see notes for more details, H/D Erised 2020, Harry Potter Has Long Hair, Kid Fic, Minor Ginny Weasley/Blaise Zabini, Minor Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Minor Neville Longbottom/Hannah Abbott/Luna Lovegood, Background Polyamory, Past Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley, Past Draco Malfoy/Original Male Characters Summary:  Teddy closes his eyes, wishing beyond wishes that the two men in his life whom he loves more than anyone would just learn to get along. A light flares. Teddy cries out, and the room falls silent. Harry and Draco struggle to find a way to escape a world of dark fairy tales and get back to Teddy, but the challenges they face are not all hidden in the woods. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Under the Bludgeonings of Chance by spookywoods Rated:  Mature Words:  45130 Tags: Case Fic, Aurors, Scotland, Department of Mysteries, Kneazles, Not Epilogue Compliant, Herbology, Greek Mythology - Freeform, Kissing, Pining, Angst, Murder Mystery, Kidnapping, Cockblocking Ficus Summary:  After eight months on his first undercover mission, Harry suddenly finds himself caught up in a bizarre mix of events revolving around a red kneazle, the murder of a rich Pureblood, and an unapologetic, acrobatic Draco Malfoy. Featuring Greek Curses, out of season Christmas Jumpers, and Gilderoy Lockhart's sister (or is it?). ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Before the World Was Made by daftfear Rated:  Teen and Up Words:  42976 Tags: EWE, magical bonding, Language Summary:  Draco has done everything in his power to leave the past behind him. He’s established himself a successful business and built a reputation around the quality of his work and the breadth of his knowledge. But when aurors show up at his shop one afternoon, seeking his expertise on a peculiar item of questionable origins, they completely overthrow the precarious balance in Draco’s life. Trust Potter to bring danger and destruction in his wake, along with a painful reminder of all the things Draco is trying to forget. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Want a Whole Lotta Love by musiclily88 Rated:  Not Rated Words:  1762 Tags: Quarantine, Cursed Object, draco is a researcher of cursed objects, Harry is an Auror, This is very niche Summary:  Cursed objects and quarantine ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 The Slytherin Urn by ICMezzo Rated:  Explicit Words:  4652 Tags: magic kink, Spell-Casting kink, Sexual Fantasy, Redemption, Unspeakable Draco, Auror Harry Summary:  Nothing turns Harry on quite like redemption. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 An Auror, A Curse Breaker and a Tea Pot by dracogotgame Rated:  General Words:  1572 Tags: Aurors, Curse Breaking, Humour, Fluff, Oneshot, Creatures, injuries Summary:  Harry fights a teapot and loses. At least it gets better from there. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Impervius by ravenclawsquill Rated:  Explicit Words:  10997 Tags: Humor, Bickering, Case Fic, Forced Proximity, Romance, Drizzle - Freeform, Banter, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Explicit Sexual Content, Curse Breaker Draco Malfoy, Auror Harry Potter, Pink Umbrella - Freeform, Wet Clothing, Competence Kink, pub, Flirting, Hideous Decor, Rain, Kissing in the Rain, Bottom Draco, Top Harry, Rimming, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Begging, Disastrous Transfiguration Summary:  Harry and Draco are working together on a case in the beautiful English Lake District. Or, it would be beautiful if only it would stop raining. Fortunately, Harry has an umbrella. Unfortunately, it's pink and frilly, and Draco would rather die than share it with him. Featuring a cursed cave, endless bickering and a pesky flock of sheep. ❤️ Read on AO3

Dear Writer

Heyyo!

It's good to see you here, this is a long exchange so the main thing is enjoying yrself so feel free to pick and choose or ignore this letter as you wish! And feel free to browse through my letter tag for more ideas.

Also, I’m on that full-time work and full-time uni degree grind so it probably will take me like a month to read the fic, does not mean I do not love it and I promise to get to it!! Don’t stress to much about a gap between posting and commenting <3

Now without further ado onto the letter:

General Likes: Trans characters, queer themes, queer solidarity, character development, strong gen. relationships and interactions with characters outside of a relationship, dialogue-driven story, non-linear narrative, animals, angst, hurt/comfort, character introspection

DNW: underage, a/b/o, past S7 for SPN

Supernatural

DNW: Anything past Season 7

Likes: boy king arc, Sam centric fic, queer Sam (I literally head canon him as anything with whatever pronouns), Bobby, trans Dean, religious iconography/themes, Sam being a lore nerd

Dislikes: Sidelining Sam 

Sam/Ruby

1. Ruby lives, I’d love to see how this plays out in Season Five. Whether she sticks with Lucifer or chooses Sam.

2. Sam goes dark side after freeing Lucifer

3. Earlier on Sam starts trusting her and fulfilling his role as the boy king. If this stops Dean from going to hell, changes the way the demons work etc

Sam/Jess

1. Jess lives au! My personal head canon is that Jess is pre-med and being very intent on saving people. When she finds out about hunting, she realises that she can’t just go back to being “normal” knowing people are dying. Maybe Sam decides to go back to law school and they have a semi long-distance relationship where she asks him for advice, maybe they hunt together every now and again. Maybe she joins Dean and Sam and they become a hunting trio.

2. Jess gets brought back to life – place this in any season you want! Go wild.

Dean & Sam

1. Dean keeps in touch with Sam during Stanford! Maybe from the get-go, maybe after a couple of years, maybe seeing each other, maybe just through postcards

2. I’d love to see them during S4 where their relationship starts to fall apart, but like also see them still loving each other

Sam & Dean & John

1. John gets a year to live instead of instantly going to hell AU – how do they react? Do they try to save him? Does John tell them?

2. I’d love a sort of non-linear story of them (especially Sam because it’s been so long) trying to integrate John into his adult life also looking at his life as a child/teen. You know the general angst about how he’d done it, he’d gotten away and he’s right back at square one. Also, Dean starting to realise that he isn’t a kid anymore, and he’s got his own thoughts etc

Sam & Dean & Cas - Cas/Dean & Sam

1. I want to see Sam and Cas and Dean being pals! I especially want to see Cas trying to figure out how he feels about Sam without heaven influencing him to think of him purely as the boy with the demon blood who will break the last seal. I wanna see Dean making fun of Cas with various misconceptions about the bible and Cas just taking it wildly seriously and not getting any jokes.

2. I’d love just a domestic-ish fic, let Sam drill Cas with questions about angels and heaven! Let Cas drill Dean and Sam about human culture! Would love to see Cas taking human culture things out of the context that Sam and Dean provide him, or maybe Dean purposely lies to him about something as a prank

Sam

1. Licherally anything in the boy king arc! I’d love to see him fulfilling his role as the boy king. This stops Dean from going to hell, changes the way the demons work etc

2. His time at Stanford! I’d love to see him adjusting to his new life.

3. I would love to see a bit more of him in Season Four! How he feels about Dean being chosen by the angels, how this affects his view on religion, how he feels about himself and the demon. Blood etc

4. Just some introspection anytime in the series tbh, love to see this boy struggle with wanting to be good, with wanting to be normal, and then um not being those things

5. I’d love a sort of non-linear story of Sam trying to integrate John into his adult life also looking at his life as a child/teen. You know the general angst about how he’d done it, he’d gotten away and he’s right back at square one.

Final Fantasy XV

Likes: fics that include the whole gang, trans Gladio, anything with Prompto, angst about destiny, angst about royal linage, character introspection

Noctis/Gladio/Ignis/Prompto

1. I really like angsty fics about destiny with this lot - I would love to see how the way in which they’ve been raised effects their relationship, be it being groomed to be king or shield or advisor. I would love a getting together fic, with whichever ship you wish to write, with a lot of internal angst.

2. I would also love a post cannon fic where Noctis is alive (magic, never died, skip over it entirely it’s up to you) where they all settle down, maybe Noctis lets the world think he has died so he can live a peaceful life?

3. Set between game cannon and Brotherhood, I‘d be down to see what these guys got up to in the years between high school and the road trip. Did Prompto and Noctis study after high school? Do they travel?’

4. Less of a prompt and more a vague feeling but like *slaps prompto* this bad boy can fit so much angst in it. Honestly he’s childhood is depressing af, with the lack of parents and friends combined with a shit body image/relationship with food I wld rlly love some emotional hurt/comfort with him and the squad

Noctis/Prompto

1. I really like angsty fics about destiny with this lot - I would love to see how the way in which they’ve been raised effects their relationship, be it being groomed to be king or shield or advisor. I would love a getting together fic, with whichever ship you wish to write, with a lot of internal angst.

2. I would also love a post cannon fic where Noctis is alive (magic, never died, skip over it entirely it’s up to you) where they all settle down, maybe Noctis lets the world think he has died so he can live a peaceful life?

3. I would like to see a fic of Prompto integrating himself into Noctis’ life, Gladio and Ignis have been around his entire life, so how does Prompto feel about them? How do they feel about him? Honestly I’m 100% here for awkward insecure bby Prompto

4. Set between game cannon and Brotherhood, I‘d be down to see what these guys got up to in the years between high school and the road trip. Did Prompto and Noctis study after high school? Do they travel?

5. Less of a prompt and more a vague feeling but like *slaps prompto* this bad boy can fit so much angst in it. Honestly, he’s childhood is depressing af, with the lack of parents and friends combined with a shit body image/relationship with food I wld rlly love some emotional hurt/comfort with him and the squad

Naruto

Likes: the summons, Rock Lee, the squads and how they operate, Naruto getting to eat the ramen he deserves, Sakura being an actual bad arse fleshed out character, trans Naruto

Sasuke/Naruto

1. Naruto leaves and joins Sasuke on his mission to destroy to Leaf, talks him out of y’know murdering everyone but agrees that the Shinobi system is deeply fucked and needs to be fixed

2. I’d like a fic of Sasuke thinking about Naruto while doing all his plotting, be it set when he’s with Orochimaru or the Akatsuki, it would be nice to see him thinking about Naruto, wanting to stop doing so, wondering how strong he could have been if he had managed to kill him and gain the mangekyou earlier

Gai/Naruto

1. I’d like a fic set just before Kakashi gets his genin, really love to see Gai trying to talk up how cool having a squad is! Dragging Kakashi to see his kids and being like aren’t my team great! And then Team Gai getting into some crazy hijinks that make Kakashi a lil scared about the future but also maybe a bit endeared towards them

2. a fic of Gai watching Kakashi slowly loose himself while in ANBU, of him trying to make things right and not being able to and then eventually asking him to be removed from the forces

SDV

Likes: world building, farm creatures, small town hijinks

Sam/Seb

1. Angst about getting out of town, leaving SDV and becoming who they dreamed they would in HS

Sam & Seb & Abigail

1. Abigail talks them into exploring the mines

2. They pull a prank

3. Angst about getting out of town, leaving SDV and becoming who they dreamed they would in HS

missed

TITLE: missed CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 5/14 AUTHOR: hiddlemediddles ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine being one of the few female frost giants left. As the race is dying out, you are expected to bear as many children as possible. You escape when Jotunheim is under attack, finding yourself on earth. Dr. Strange senses your arrival and takes you to the Avengers, where they are in awe of your appearance. Blue skin and crimson red eyes. When Loki sees you, he doesn’t quite know how to respond. RATING: M NOTES/WARNINGS: Things complicate.. and move on rather quickly! Tagging @lokislilslut x - Falling asleep was impossible. Despite having spoken a great deal to Strange and Parker, you felt none of the usual tugs of fatigue. All of your nerves felt shocked, they felt primed for action and stimulation. You had been sitting there for hours already, blindly staring at Raze’s sword. You had also, involuntarily, been running Loki’s conversation in your head. What struck you the most was his appearance. His appearance as a Jotun. It was a sight you never thought you would see. Perhaps Thor had not even seen it. 

You had been given a room, which they had cooled down considerably. You had wanted to, initially, sleep in the freezing vault. However, after lying down for a while, you felt that it was too strange to sleep like you had slept in Jotunheim when you were.. on Earth. What troubled you the most was not only your grief.. the deep engraving of grief. The stamp on your existence. It was also the uncertainty of your future. What happened now? Did you simply live on in grief? Did you simply live on in this tower, sitting in their freezing vault for the rest of your days? The only answers to those questions could be answered in the future.. when those events had either occurred or never occurred. You wondered if you would ever be in Jotunheim again. How strange it was to think.. it was not long ago when you were being primed as a wife for Ymir. It was not long ago when Grundroth was announcing assigned wives. It was not long ago when Rana was kissing and hugging Raze in your home. None of it was long ago. From your conjectures, you had gathered that it had been two weeks. Two weeks of waking up, or not even having slept, only to then grieve for the rest of the day and eat little. Two weeks of.. feeling nothing. Feeling.. numb. The only time you had seen Loki which had been a few days ago when he had entered the freezing vault, embodying his true form, to speak to you. Days had passed, though it felt like hours. Time passed far too quickly for you to even be able to tell the difference between night and day. After all, you had been confined to the building for two weeks. A sudden thought struck your mind. Would you ever see the light of day again? Not that Jotunheim contained the light of day. That is, would you ever step outdoors? You had decided that if you were going to die anywhere it would be in Jotunheim. Before that had happened, you would try and.. gather the lost pieces. You were out of the room early. You yearned to be outside.. to be out in the fresh air. It didn’t strike you, however, that it was a good idea to walk outside of the building and expose yourself to the Midgardians. Innocent as they were, you did not wish to tarnish their psyche. As people said, they had little to no knowledge whatsoever that they were, in fact, not alone in the universe. All of those Midgardians who had seen you were ‘in on the secret’ as they said. You knew that you wouldn’t be able to leave.. they had likely made some type of system to prevent you from stepping even a foot outside. Instead, you were standing beside the windows of the largest room in the Tower. It felt so inexplicably high. You leant against the barrier of the window, gazing out at the large buildings which surrounded the tower. You tried to look down to the streets.. to see the people walking around, yet it was too high for you to even make them out. “I once threw Stark through this window.” A voice said smoothly behind you. You did not bother turning around, knowing those tones well enough already. “What prompted that treatment, Loki?” Loki stood beside you, gazing out at the buildings with you. “I was under the influence of the tesseract. It took over my mind. I threatened Stark with an army of Chitauri.. suddenly I was throwing him out of the window” “Do you remember much of it?” Loki chuckled smoothly. “Thankfully, I do not. I believe I placed many people under my subjugation.. including a few agents of SHIELD who also cannot remember much of what they themselves did. The mind stone is just that - a stone which grips each crevice of the mind.” You suddenly felt another question niggle in your mind, though it was nothing to do with the topic. You turned to him now, gazing at him in his human form. You could tell that he felt comfortable in this form. In the mask. “Do you regret not knowing your heritage from childhood?” Loki absorbed the question, allowing it to float through his mind. It was one of the most difficult questions that he could answer. He regretted not knowing who he truly was, though he found that he would have felt like an outcast as a Jotun.. playing the role of an Asgardian prince. “From the point of view of knowing who I truly am, then yes. Yet, I would not have felt accepted as Odin’s true son. I resent him only for driving into my brain the idea that I could be a King.. when in reality, the only kingdom that I could have legitimately ruled was Jotunheim. I regret that I was ever obsessed with the idea of subjugation.. obsessed with ruling over people that I would have viewed as my subordinates” “Do you ever think you could have reconciled with the idea that you were.. Jotun.. at that age?” “I remember when my father went to show us the Casket. When I asked about it afterwards, it was my mother who told me about Jotunheim. Yet, she didn’t speak about them with the hatred that I had heard from others. Had I been a Jotun, I could have reconciled.. reluctantly.. yet I could not have accepted lightly that my mother was not my.. biological mother” You turned your head away, staring ahead again. You had heard, years ago, of the battle waged against the Asgardians by the Dark Elves. Frigga had been mortally wounded. “You are not the only one who has..” Loki said, almost trailing off. You turned your head to look at him again, focusing those crimson eyes on his face. “Lost..” You could almost feel his arm resting against your own, from how close you both were standing to one and other. Instinctively shuffling away from him, you realised how foolish you were being by pushing him away. He seemed truly reformed. You had even told Strange that you did not harbour resentment towards him.. why was it so different now that you were in his presence? Rushing footsteps broke you both out of your reverie. You both instinctively turned, finding that Wanda herself was running towards you both. “You both need to leave, now” she said, ushering you both towards the exit of the room. “Why is that?” You asked, utterly confused. Before your confusion could continue, Wanda was already moving you both away from the room. “A SHIELD agent.. rogue.. tipped off to the rebels that you are here, on Earth” she said quickly. “You have to leave.. they’re here.. they can probably sense you from a mile off.” “How did they escape the prison in Asgard?” Loki asked, dumbfounded, yet he continued to quicken his pace. “Thor is going out of his mind with confusion about it. What worries him, however, is how many more rogues there may be inside SHIELD.” “Where on Earth can we go if they can.. sense me?” “We aren’t even sure if they can sense you.. but we can’t take any risks. If they can escape the most secure prison in the universe, they have power very much on their side.” Before you could even think of protesting, they were conveying you inside some black vehicle. Barely sitting down, the car started to move. Wanda was sitting in the front seat, meanwhile Loki was in the back with you. The driver didn’t seem disturbed in the slightest when he saw you. He must have been forewarned that he would have an alien-looking being in the back of his car. “Just keep driving. We’ll figure out the particulars when I get some more information on this.. thing” she said, holding up some square electronic device. “I believe that 'thing’ may be a telephone, Miss. Maximoff. Though, I will forgive you for the fact that it most definitely does not look like one. Screens seem to be getting bigger and bigger these days..” Loki mumbled, smirking secretively. Catching everything, she turned around. “Remind me why you are here?” It was her turn to smirk. You smiled, one of the first you had displayed for a long while. Loki was lucky enough to have seen it. Yet, it vanished almost as quickly as it appeared when you remembered the reason you were abruptly driving away. “I volunteer myself to guard Y/N” Loki said, almost heroically. “We can convey her to my residence. I have magic surrounding it which will prevent any.. hostile forces.. penetrating it” You thought your stomach had quite literally flipped within the cage of your body, or at least jumped to your rib cage. You slowly turned your head to look at him. He was already gazing at you steadily. “If Y/N is.. content with that” he continued gently. You wondered if you were truly content with that, but realised that in the heat of the moment you didn’t exactly have any choice in the matter. Wanda had also turned around to look at you. You felt pressurised to make a sudden decision. Though, internally, you knew from the moment he had proposed it that it was the correct route to take. “Okay” You said quietly, barely perceptible to them. “As long as it’s safe.. and nobody will die trying to protect me” “That is a difficult combination” Wanda said. “But I suppose it makes sense” “You will be safe” Loki said, ignoring the last part of your sentence. You nodded your confirmation, unable to perceive any ill intention within Loki’s eyes. You were reluctant to trust him, seeing as who he was, yet you found that you did. “Put it into the route finder, then.” Wanda said, gesturing at the car box. One moment you had been gazing over the view from Stark Tower and now you were suddenly moving into Loki’s private residence. As the car drove on, you found yourself questioning why you were hiding away from the rebels. A part of you, likely the part of you which clung onto Raze, wanted to go and confront them.. a part of you wanted to fight. Yet, you would be fighting a force that you could only just hope to even understand.  “Ah, yes.. I did not mention.. my residence is quite far..” “Quite far? Where on earth…” she whispered, before she discovered that Loki’s residence was in fact located in an area not too far from the top of Scotland. “Scotland? Right, you put in the airport.” “Of course. Scotland is in the United Kingdom, which we would need to take a plane for. Excellent spot.. perfect for those needing the cold weather” Loki said, turning to you with a smile on his face. You gave a curt nod before turning back to look out of the window. The car was going so fast that you knew that nobody would see you within. The word 'plane’ suddenly caught your attention and you turned back. He smirked at you before you realised that there was simply no other way. You turned back to look out of the window. You were seeing so much. So many.. people. All of whom you would likely never see again in your life. You wondered what it was like to live amongst them. Where the men as violent and brutish as those in Jotunheim? Where they.. as dominant? They were questions which you yearned to ask, yet you could never find the right time. You felt the pangs of fatigue take a hold of you. The vehicle’s swift movements.. the sensation of moving yet staying.. was enough to make you feel tired enough. You leaned back against the seat, allowing your head to drop back against the head rest. You tried to forget that there was anyone around you. You tried to forget that Loki was sitting a mere few inches away from you. Slowly, but surely, you were falling asleep. Loki had turned his head secretively to look at you. He didn’t think he had ever seen a sight so.. beautiful. As he gazed at you, he couldn’t believe that he could ever have thought of something to beautifully innocent to ever have been.. evil. He traced his eyes over the patterns of your skin, willing himself to stop at the dip of your neck. Before he could get carried away, he turned his eyes towards the window with restraint. You enticed him. He knew that you were far more beautiful than he could have ever anticipated.

Two Person System

Ethan x MC (Levin Stern)

WC: ~3200

Tags: @writerapprentice @vickypoochoices

Summary: This is the first part in a series of Levin and Ethan’s story now that they’re colleagues, which is a struggle because love is a two person system.

Dr Levin Stern sat in the front seat of Dr Ethan Ramey's car and wondered how she was going to crack this one. Levin knew she shouldn't do this, not again, trying to crack boys who didn't want to open up. She had learnt her lesson from her ex-boyfriend, well, she should have. Not to mention the stakes were much, much higher now, now he was her direct supervisor. She had the job of her dreams, the job she thought would take years to get to, but now, she had it all within reach. She was a firm believer that no man was worth her education or her career and those two things often went hand in hand. Levin had been debating the options over and over again in her head these past few weeks. She was stuck between a rock and a hard place, Ethan being the rock, obviously.

They were on their way to Albany for a medical conference and the hospital had taken too long to book flights and there were no seats available, so Ethan offered to drive. What a joke. If only some idiot hadn’t rear-ended her car the week before then they wouldn't be in this situation. A whole three-hour drive to get through. Fate had stabbed them and then twisted the knife.

Things had been understandably awkward between the two of them since she started on the diagnostics team. Levin had tried to maintain her professionalism, but it wasn't normal for her, she was used to goading Ethan, trying to make him smile and stop taking things so seriously, but she felt like she couldn't do that anymore, she felt like he couldn't be herself around him anymore. They had slept together thinking they would be colleagues at best, not with Ethan as her direct supervisor. It had only been a few weeks, maybe they just needed time to settle into the new situation they found themselves in.

"So," Ethan started after letting out a soft sigh, "how's life?" Levin smirked a little at how the tables had turned, just last year she had - somewhat awkwardly - asked him that same question when they were on the hunt for baby Ethan Hudson's stuffed frog toy.

"Um, it's good, I'm still getting used to things," Levin's voice is slow, she looks down to her lap and fiddles with the end of her scarf, "the whole office thing feels strange," she gave a short laugh.

Now that she was a junior fellow, Levin was given her own office in the hospital, right across the hall from Ethan's, albeit, hers was not as large and extravagant as his, but she did manage to find a good quality but a cheap coffee machine for her office.

"Yes, you'll need to find a comfy couch for between-shift power naps," Ethan smiles as he changes lanes, they were out of the city now and on the interstate, "and some earplugs, the walls are pretty thin,"

Levin coughs awkwardly, wondering if he realises the subtext of that statement, "God, maybe I should just move in there, I spend more time at the hospital than the apartment I actually pay rent on," Levin scolded herself internally, what the fuck was going on, this wasn't like her, Levin was the least awkward person in Boston, she prided herself on being able to make conversation with anyone, her ability to make people feel at ease and comfortable. It’s what made her a great doctor. Now, here she was, in the front seat of Ethan's car, second-guessing every word that comes out of her mouth. "Do we have to listen to this?" She says without thinking, the question catching both of them by surprise.

Ethan's mouth hangs open slightly, but he catches himself quickly and furrows his brow. There's a concerto playing and whilst it's beautiful, it's making Levin extremely sleepy, she didn't get much sleep last night between the constant study and also constant distraction of a certain surgical resident. "You don't like my music, Ro- uh, Dr Stern?" Levin sighed, he doesn't even call her Rookie anymore.

She looks over to him, "It's not that I don't like it, but I'd like something a bit more upbeat, I'm tired and this isn't really helping," she tells him truthfully and he glances over at her quickly before turning his eyes back to the road.

"Alright, you can put something on, let's see what sort of music you've got on there," he gestures to her phone and turns the Bluetooth in the cars sound system on.

She connects to the cars audio but takes a few seconds looking through her phone, she had playlists for every occasion: sad songs, party songs, Disney songs, 2009 songs, songs for the shower. She took a moment and figured her study playlist would be a pretty good option, songs that were catchy but still not too distracting. If Ethan is surprised or impressed or feeling any form of emotion right now, he doesn't show it, but soon he taps his fingers against the steering wheel and Levin can't help but feel like she's won this round.

She ties her long chestnut hair in a small bun at the nape of her neck, pulls her legs up onto the seat so they're crossed and retrieves her iPad from her handbag. Levin had downloaded all of her medical textbooks and journals onto it as well as dozens of medical apps, the device was practically attached to her hip at the hospital and she had bought it along with her this weekend so she could get in some much-needed study. While she had been getting some amazing practical learning done on the diagnostics team, she felt like she hadn't been able to study as much because of all the energy she was directed into working with Ethan.

"We're going to be at a medical conference all weekend, you're really going to study right now?" Ethan asks and she doesn't look up, pulling out the devices pencil to take notes along the sides of the pages.

"If you were me, wouldn't you be studying?" She says back, but she doesn't feel like she's paying much attention to her attending, the playlist has pretty much conditioned her to be in full-on study mode as soon as she hears it. Ethan doesn't reply and that's how she knows he agrees with her statement.

The next two hours that go by are relatively uneventful, Ethan had filled the gas tank before they left the city and Levin had her eyes glued to her textbooks the whole way down. They arrive at the hotel and retrieve their bags from the back of the car and just as Ethan hands the keys to the valet, an older man in a tailored navy suit stops him to question Ethan about the new book he's writing. I didn't know he was writing a new book, Levin thinks to herself but quickly shakes the feeling away, he didn't need to tell her, that's not her place. She slips off quietly, she wants this weekend to go by as quickly and painlessly as possible, getting caught up in conversations with Ethan is not apart of her plan.

Levin walks over to the reception desk in the foyer, she gets the key card to her room and makes her way over to the elevator, keeping her head low and her walk quick. Pulling her phone out of her bag, she catches up on any messages or emails she'd missed while it was on silent in the car.

Bryce Lahela (7 new messages)

Levin rolls her eyes, she's not surprised, Bryce has no shame in double or triple texting, he messages anything and everything that goes through his head, their text chain was basically a tour through his mind.

4.26pm: have you left already?

4.27pm: have you left already??????

4.30pm: ?have?you?left?already?

4.31pm: !!!!levin!!!!

5.02pm: hows the trip with dr. Terminator?

5.18pm: why aren't you taking me seriously

6.12pm: ugh and you say I'm annoying

How he had time to text her all these messages she had no idea, she knew he was at the hospital today, they'd all eaten together in the cafeteria at lunch. She laughed and typed out a quick reply before stepping out of the elevator, sorry, studied the whole drive over, the soundtrack would've made your ears bleed :(

Levin enters the room, sets her travel bag on the armchair and closes the blinds, she hasn't decided what she's doing for dinner yet but she does know she needs to change out of her crumpled travel clothes. Levin pulls on a long red skirt, that falls around mid-calf and has a long split up the thigh, a black top and pair of boots, she puts her phone and other necessities into a small shoulder bag and turns the lights off before walking out into the hallway, where she unexpectedly crashes into something, or rather someone.

Ethan's hands reach out and he grabs Levin by her elbows, steadying her before she falls back into the door, "Uh, sorry, I should've been looking where I was going," he says as he pulls her back up so she's standing straight. He watches her as she brushes down her outfit and hikes her bag back up onto her shoulder, "You were going somewhere?" He asks, brows furrowed and she looks like a teenager that's been caught sneaking out of the house.

"Um, yeah, I was just going to get some dinner, the hotel restaurant doesn't seem too appealing and there's a really nice place a few blocks from here." Levin shrugs and looks up to meet his gaze, he's studying her carefully, like her can’t figured her out.

"You really left me struggling back there and now you're going to leave me to eat in this crappy restaurant?" He laughs shortly and even though he covers it well, Levin can see that he's slightly offended.

"You're welcome to join," she offers even though she really doesn't want to, but luckily Levin is much better at hiding this than Ethan is.

"Let me put my bags in my room," He says and she tries to hold herself back from staring at his ass as he walks away. He was making it really hard for her to control herself. Levin rested against the wall and scrolled through social media as she waited for Ethan to sort himself, checking some emails and making a mental note of what she had to do when she got back to the room tonight, she was interrupted by the sound of a door opening, Levin had to contain herself when Ethan walked back out of the room, wearing a casual white button down and blue jeans.

Oh fucking fuck he looks so good, Levin thought to herself, this is going to be a long night.

They are barely out of the front door when Levin's phone starts ringing: Mom. "Sorry," she looked at Ethan, "I should take this," Ethan nods in agreement, and she answers to hear the usual array of noise in the background.

"Levin, babe, do you know where I put Edda’s medical folder? I can't seem to find it after the move," Levin rolls her eyes as her mum continues to rattle off all of the other things she's lost over the past couple of weeks, her mother was the sort of person who would lose her own head if it wasn't screwed on. Every week it was a new call or text asking about files or paperwork or the password to her email.

Levin didn't need to rack her brain, "Mum, it's in the filing cabinet, where it should stay, stop taking things out and leaving them all around the house," She had spent so much time moving into her mother into their new house in Fairhaven just over five years ago, she'd taken two weeks off of her college break to help her. Her mother seemed to be hellbent on turning the beautiful, organised home Levin had made into a glorified rats nest.

"Oh sorry babe, it's just been so crazy with the kids on break and starting the new job,” her mum continues to rattle off and Levin lets out small mhm’s and ahh’s when necessary. Her life was like this often, putting out fires at the hospital and putting out fires at home, her mum called her whenever something went wrong, no matter how big or small (often small) which meant she was constantly looking at her phone to see what the next big emergency was this time.

Once her mum has found the medical records, her house keys and successfully sent Levin into a disorganised rage, she hangs up the phone. Ethan and Levin have reached the restaurant by now and they’re greeted with friendly smiles. “Levy!” The stout man walks over to her with his arms outstretched, a smile stretched across his face, “so good to see you! When the others told me you were stopping by for dinner I had to come back in and see you!” He places his hands firmly on her shoulders and pulls her in for a hug.

“Thanks, Trevor, you know I can't come to town without saying hello and carb loading to the Max,” Levin smiles, stepping back to introduce him to Ethan, “this is Ethan,” she gestures to the tall doctor and Trevors eyes twinkle.

“The is the first time she’s brought a boy arou-”

“My boss,” Levin interjects and Trevor make a small ‘o’ with his mouth.

“I see, well a pleasure to meet you anyway,” he stretches his hand out to shake Ethan’s and Levin can tell he's impressed by the firm handshake, the nice dress shoes and Tommy Hilfiger button down, “we don’t get to see our Levin much now that she’s a big shot doctor down in Boston, so tonight’s meal is on the house!”

Ethan starts to protest, he can afford a meal and doesn’t want to put them out of any revenue but Levin makes a face that tells him not to, Trevor loves to accommodate old friends and will not let them pay a dime, Levin gets around this by leaving a couple of twenties in the tip jar.

It’s a Friday night and the restaurant is crowded and after a short catch up, Trevor finds them a nice table outside by the fire, surrounded by leafy plants and intimate lighting. Levin didn't mean for this to be so romantic, but she didn’t want to ask for another table at the risk of coming off ungrateful. They take their seats and order some wine to start, Ethan looks over at the young doctor curiously, she looks gorgeous in this lighting he thinks, he dark chestnut hair is somehow shining even in the dim lighting, and the outfit looks gorgeous on her tanned skinned. Ethan tries not to stare but he's finding it harder than usual, she has one leg crossed over the other and is facing the small band playing in the corner of the room, the slit in her skirt leaves most of her leg uncovered and Ethan can feel his heart race.

“You’re a regular?” Ethan asks, voice cutting above the chatter of the people around him, Levin turns to look at him, a small smile pulling at the corner of her mouth.

“Trevor is an old friend of my dad’s,” she tells him, “we spent a lot of time here growing up so I always try and visit when I’m in town,”

The waiter comes over to take their orders, Levin orders a glass of Riesling and pasta, Ethan orders some Malbec and pizza. The two of them share some arancini and bruschetta.

Ethan takes a sip from his glass, "You've never told me about your siblings," he looks at her with an eyebrow raised,

"You never talk about your family," Levin points out, but then shrugs, "I didn't realise I've never told you about them, I normally talk about them all the time. I have eight siblings so our house was pretty crazy growing up," she chuckles and takes a bite of arancini, the small ball of rice practically melts in her mouth.

"That is a lot of kids, your mother must have been running on fumes," this time he laughs too, "what are there names?"

"Um, well, I have two older brothers named Basil and Sepp, two older sisters named Evia and Sera, three younger sisters named Marti, Edda and Isa, and a younger brother named Jos,"

"Wow, those names are..." Ethan trails off, not really sure what to say so Levin finishes for him.

"Unusual?" Ethan's makes a face that conveys the sort of agreement he didn't want to admit, "My mum is super into traditional Swiss names, she even went to court over my sister and I's names," Levin laughs and takes a sip out of her wine glass.

His jaw hangs open slightly, "To court? For what? Over baby names?"

"Yeah, in Switzerland you're not really supposed to give traditional boys names to girls, so Levin and Marti were choices that the birth registry didn't initially accept, but then my mother took them to court and argued her case, she's pretty stubborn and didn't go down without a fight,"

Ethan looks at her with a small smile, "Well, now I know where you get your tenacity from," his voice is sincere, taking Levin by surprise, luckily the waiter arrives with their food before she makes things awkward. "You were born in Switzerland?" She wonders what questions he's got stored in his brain, as she pushes her food around on her plate.

Levin hesitates to answer, but nods, she feels weird sharing these things with Ethan now. She knows they need to grow together as a team but how can she do that when she has such strong feelings of affection towards her attending? Levin chews on her lips before she tells him the answers to all the questions he asks. She tells him about their three dogs growing up in Switzerland then moving to North Carolina for her dad’s job, she tells him about boarding school and almost getting kicked out after being caught sneaking into the boy's dorm, she tells him about her undergrad and the late night study sessions, bar fights, ski trips. He’s curious, she’s lived a very full life for someone so young, only twenty-five and she’s seen so much of the world, but he also knows that she’s seen so much pain. He’s heard her talking to Lahela and the other interns, stories of her mother's post-partum depression and the years that followed with a shell of a mother, there but not really. When they finish their meals, a silence falls between them and Ethan can see that she’s caught up in her own head, running her brain on overdrive, a brain running on anxiety. He quietly clears his throat before he does something he hasn’t done in a long time, he opens up.

“I’m an only child,” Levin’s eyes snap up, meeting Ethan's gaze, his bright blue eyes are soft, “my parents never wanted a big family,” he says the words like she’s got a knife to his throat, each word coming out at a glacial pace.

Levin smiles at him, before reaching over the table with her hand outstretched, he places his hand in hers and gives it a light squeeze.

Priorities (5)

Pairings: Bucky x Reader

Summary: You have a long talk with your husband.

Warnings: if you don’t like reading about Deep Conversations™, this chapter probably isn’t for you. Language, implied nausea.

Word Count: 2.8k

Notes: It’s finally here - the chapter that everyone has been waiting for :D

An alternative summary for this chapter would’ve been ‘Bucky gets his head out of his ass’. Written for @buckyofthemyscira​’s 5k Disney Writing Challenge. 

Series Masterlist | My Masterlist | Tags are open, add yourself here

Bucky is nervous.

Scratch that, he’s beyond nervous.

Even his nerves are nervous, goddammit.

(Shuri would say that he’s highkey terrified.)

Bucky legitimately thinks that he’s about to shit his pants, and isn’t that just a pleasant thought?

The last time his palms were this sweaty, he’d been pacing the floor of his mouldy dorm room, anxiously waiting to propose to you. The last time his heart was pounding this hard, he’d been seconds away from giving his first presentation to the SI board of directors. The last time his throat had been this dry, he’d been standing under a canopy of flowers, preparing himself to recite his vows to you.

Bucky can hardly hear anything beyond the roar of his pulse in his ears, and that bagel he’d had for breakfast is slowly working its way up his throat.

So yeah. He’s nervous as fuck.

You haven’t said anything since you stumbled across him, so Bucky clears his throat and lets the words pour out of his mouth.

“Look, honey, I’m sorry. I’ve — well, heh. I’ve been a pretty fucking shit husband lately, and I’m so, so sorry,” he says sincerely, “I can’t say that enough. If you’d like to...I mean...do you wanna talk?”

You blink owlishly. “Now?” you ask.

“Uh...yeah?” he says slowly. “Or...is now not a good time?”

You narrow your eyes in suspicion. “Well, I don’t know, is it a good time for you, James? You’re always going on about a certain project you’re working on, and how you’re so busy with it.”

Bucky grimaces. Yeah, he probably deserved that. He scratches the back of his neck awkwardly.

“I, um — I asked Shuri and Sam to man the fort for a bit. We’ve got time.”

You purse your lips. “How did you know where to find me?”

Bucky blushes, ducking his head shyly. “Um, Steve showed me one of your blogposts—”

“He what?” you squawk. “He reads my—my blog?”

“Well, he kinda stumbled across it when—actually nevermind,” Bucky says, breaking off with an awkward cough. “I uh...yeah, so he showed me, and I read some of them, and you mentioned in one that you were staying in your friend W’s house and….well. You’ve only got one friend whose name starts with a ‘W’, so...yeah.”

You huff dryly. Bucky stuffs his hands into his pockets and stares down at his shoes whilst he anxiously waits for your response.

“Alright,” you sigh, “Yeah, okay. Come inside.”

—

Though you knew that you’d need to talk to Bucky eventually, you’d been hoping to have at least another day to gather your thoughts. Sure, you have a rough idea of what you want to say, but you were hoping to spend the rest of the afternoon gathering your thoughts and hashing out a rough script.

Then again, Pepper did say that if Bucky wanted to sit down and talk to you, you’d be stupid not to seize the opportunity that you’d been presented with.

(Okay, perhaps those weren’t her exact words, but she’d said something to the same extent.)

Wanda’s house is empty, as she and Vis have gone out for the afternoon. You’d spent most of the morning with her and Natasha, lounging on the couch and binging your favourite TV show on Netflix. The three of you had gone your separate ways in the afternoon, after you’d told the girls about your unexpected message from Pepper.

As you bring your husband to the guest bedroom, you can’t help but feel a little bit nervous. Your skin is tingling with anticipation and your heart is thumping against your ribs. On the one hand, you’re glad that Bucky has — seemingly — come to his senses and reached out to you. On the other hand, you’ve got no idea how the next hour or so will pan out.

Will you two still be a married couple by the end of the afternoon?

Only time will tell.

You shoulder open the bedroom door and gracefully plop yourself at the foot of the bed, crossing your legs at the knee.

“Take a seat,” you tell Bucky, gesturing towards the armchair in the corner of the room.

You watch as he shrugs off his black suit jacket, carefully draping it over the armrest before he takes a seat. Now that you’re able to look at him properly, you realise just how much last night seems to have taken its toll on Bucky.

There are dark purple bags under his eyes, and the coating of stubble on his jaw indicates that he hadn’t bothered to shave this morning, which is completely unlike him. Besides that, he hasn’t taken the effort to style his hair like he usually does, and his white button-down and black slacks look crumpled, and a little worse-for-wear.”

“You look like shit,” you tell him.

Bucky’s eyes widen in surprise, before he bursts out into hysterical laughter, burying his face in his hands as his shoulders quake uncontrollably.

You’re taken aback, but choose to bite your tongue and wait out his laughing fit.

“Oh, jeez,” Bucky sighs, as he sits back and scrubs his eyes wearily. “Would you believe that you’re the third person to say to me, today?”

You shrug, biting your lip to keep your expression neutral. “It’s the truth,” you say airily.

“Yeah, well. I guess,” he sighs, before clearing his throat and sitting up straighter. “So, uh...any idea how you wanna do this? Is it okay if I say something first?”

You nod and motion for him to go ahead.

“Thanks,” he murmurs, as he clasps his hands in his lap; a sure sign of his nerves. “Okay, well, um, first and foremost — I want you to know that I love you. And that I never, ever stopped loving you, and I’m sorry if I ever made you think that way.”

He pauses, and rakes his fingers through his hair. “I guess I haven’t been doing a good enough job at being your husband, so I promise you, I’m gonna try harder, do better.”

You school your features into a neutral expression, not wanting to give away any of your thoughts. Whilst it’s nice to know that Bucky has recognised — at least some — of his faults, you don’t want to hear promises from him. You want to know how he’s actually going to fulfil the promises that he’s making.

“I think that we haven’t been communicating with each other a lot, recently,” you say slowly. “There’re things on my mind that I haven’t shared with you, and...I don’t think we’re on the same page anymore.”

“I agree.”

“So...maybe the best thing to do is to clear the air, lay out all our cards and just...take it from there, yeah?”

Bucky nods in agreement. “Great plan. So, um — yeah, like I said before, I’ve read your blogposts, and I think that I know what’s been troubling you—”

“And right there’s the problem,” you interrupt, holding up a hand to silence him. Bucky’s mouth snaps shut with an audible click.

“See, you think you know what’s bothering me, but you don’t know, not really. You can’t make assumptions like that, Buck, you gotta talk to me. And — okay, yeah, I know I’ve got my issues too, but the point is, you can’t assume that you everything — that’s kinda the crux of the issue, really.”

Bucky sits back and considers you for a moment. “Okay, I — you’re right. Yeah. Yeah, okay, I see what you’re saying,” he mumbles, as he rubs his jaw thoughtfully. “Please — talk. Enlighten me, honey.”

You sigh, idly picking at the patterned bed sheet before continuing. “Y’know, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately, and I think that my problems can be summarised into a few points.”

“Firstly, and most importantly — I miss you,” you say simply. “I miss spending time with you. You’re never home anymore, and I...I need to see you, to have quality time with you. I wanna go on walks and visit museums and do all the stuff that we used to do. I feel like I’m not getting any of your attention anymore.”

“I’m sorry,” Bucky says, fingers twitching like he’s itching to reach out and hold your hand.

You smile at him briefly before barreling on. “Don’t get me wrong — I get it, you’re stressing over this project, and I know that you’re doing all this because you want us to be in a financially secure position, but honey? I don’t care.”

That seems to shock him. Bucky’s eyes widen minutely, and his mouth twists in confusion.

“I’m serious,” you tell him. “Honey, we could be living in a crusty apartment in the shadiest part of town and I wouldn’t fucking care, as long as I had you — yeah, okay, that’s cheesy as hell, but it’s the truth.”

You pause, biting your bottom lip shyly. “When I met you, we were both broke-ass college kids. D’you remember how we had to look under the car seats to get enough money to pay for gas that one time?”

Bucky huffs out a wry laugh. “Yeah, I remember,” he murmurs.

“We were both in a shit-ton of student debt, we barely had enough money to pay the rent, we were living off instant noodles — it wasn’t the easiest of times. But, the thing is, I loved you then, I love you now, and I’ll love you through thick and thin, Bucky I swear. I just — I don’t wanna make you choose between your work and your wife, but...we need to find a way for you to have both.”

“Okay, honey, I—”

“Hold up, hold up,” you say, “I got one more thing and then you can talk.”

“Shoot.”

You steel yourself internally before continuing. “Kids.”

Bucky’s brows pull together in confusion. “What about ‘em?”

You swallow nervously. “Well, I want to have them with you, someday, but I want to raise them with you.”

“Is this about what you wrote in that blogpost?”

You nod, relief flooding through your system when you realise that he knows what you’re talking about. “Yeah. Like, I don’t want us to be that couple, where mom’s doing all the child-raising, and dad’s just...there, as this abstract father figure in their lives. I want our kids to have a dad, to hang out with their dad, to know their dad, you get me?”

—

Bucky nods slowly as he turns your words over in his head.

What you’ve described is something he can empathise with. Growing up, sure, he’d maintained a good relationship with his father, but it had always been clear to him that his mom was in charge of looking after Bucky and his sisters. His dad hadn’t been a bad dad, per se, but he hadn’t been there for any of the big, personal moments in Buck’s life, like his first girlfriend and stuff like that.

Bucky wants to do better.

“I hear you, sweetheart, and you’re right — I have been putting my work before you, more than I should be.”

He sighs, slumping further into the chair. Bucky takes the opportunity to look at you, properly look at you, the way he hasn’t done in who-knows how long.

God, how are you so always pretty? You’re dressed in a pair of jeans and a black t-shirt with a grey hoodie on top, yet you still manage to look as beautiful as the day he first met you.

Bucky clears his throat. “I guess...I dunno.  I feel so responsible for my work, and my team and — but I ‘spose I just gotta learn to say no and push some things off my plate, huh?”

Your lips quirk into a half-smile. “There’s this thing, it’s called ‘delegating jobs’ — it’s really useful. You should try it out some time,” you say, winking mischievously.

Bucky throws his head back and laughs. “I will, sweetie, I will,” he says agreeably. “But yeah, I guess I gotta stop worrying so much about the future and just...live more in the now.”

You hum thoughtfully. “I think it’d be a good idea for you and me both to get into the habit of separating work and personal life. I mean, it’s a bit harder for me, ‘cause I actually work from home, and all, but...basically, when you’re working you’re working, and when you’re at home, you switch off.”

Bucky’s brows furrow together as he processes your words. “So like...are you saying that I should have two ‘modes’?” he asks, air-quotes and all. “Work-Bucky and home-Bucky?”

“Yep,” you say, easily rolling with the engineering analogy he’s thrown at you. “So, when you’re at work, you engage work-Bucky, you’re getting shit done, you’re productive and efficient and whatever. But, when you’re at home, you switch off from all that. You unplug, you chill out, you spend time with your family...you take a break.”

“I like that idea, I really do,” Bucky says slowly, “Actually, Sam’s been saying that I should have a better work-life balance—”

“You should really listen to what Sam says.”

He snorts. “I’m gonna pretend you didn’t just say that,” he says, mock-threateningly. “But seriously, I think I need to be better at sticking to regular office hours and...yeah. When I’m with you, I’m not working, and when I’m at work, I’m...well, working.”

You nod fervently. “Yes! I mean, we can obviously talk about our work when we’re talking about our days, just — there’s a difference between talking about work and actually doing work, y’know? And obviously, there’ll be times when you or I need to pull some overtime to meet a deadline or something, and that’s cool too, just—”

“Avoid it wherever possible?”

You smile brightly. “Exactly.”

—

You feel as if a weight has been lifted off your shoulders. This talk has been everything you’d hoped for and more.

Why on earth didn’t you do this sooner?

You watch as Bucky gets up from his chair and comes over to sit beside you on the bed. He knocks his shoulder against yours gently. “Are we okay?” he asks hesitantly.

You lean into his side and rest your head on his shoulder, humming quietly. “We’re gonna be okay.”

Bucky tentatively takes your hand in his, lacing your fingers together. You give him an affectionate, reassuring squeeze.

“I’m gonna have a good talk with my team,” he promises, “We’re gonna evaluate the situation, maybe consider taking on more people — we’re gonna sort this shit out. I’m gonna try my damn hardest to be a better husband, honey, ‘cause you deserve one.”

You turn to look at him, into those steely-grey eyes that have become your safe place in the years that you’ve known him.

“I love you,” you breathe, the corners of your lips twitching into a smile.

An exultant grin spreads over his lips. “I love you too,” he murmurs, as he bends down to press his lips to yours.

It’s a languid and luxurious kiss, both of you content to just feel your lips brushing together in the lightest of touches; neither of you are in a hurry to take things further.

You’ve missed this intimacy and closeness, being able to breathe in the familiar scent of Bucky’s cologne and underneath that, his sweat and musk. He pulls you closer, one hand wrapped around your waist, the fingers of his other hand curling around your neck. The position is a little awkward, and at one point, you accidentally elbow him in the ribs, but your heart is soaring and nothing could make this moment more incredible.

When you break away, you rest your forehead against the crook of his neck and sigh contentedly, happy that the worries that have been plaguing you for the last few weeks have finally been resolved.

“D’you need to go back to work?” you ask.

You feel, rather than see him shaking his head. “I took the rest of the day off,” Bucky tells you. “C’mon. Let’s finally go on that date that I’ve been promising you, eh?”

A simple case of exhaustion - a vampire story

She was very surprised about that, but the cold remained, the sweating continued…her pallor was almost ghastly. She examined her reflection in the mirror, if she looked very pale and felt cold, she didn’t look ill at all, strangely, the young woman who looked at herself was…beautiful. Somehow, this illness had enhanced some quality, she couldn’t say what, but the body looked toned, athletic now, her eyes, pretty in normal circumstances, sparkled. Her hair was fuller…so it seemed to her, shiny, voluptuous…ah. A bit of bed sheet action, can do that for you and more…she examined the blemish on her neck…it had almost completely healed.

She was cold, very cold. She stumbled to the bed, an incredible pain, running through her whole body it seemed, from her spine down, hit her like an éclair and she screamed in pain, except, not a scream came out, but a beastly growl, a guttural, low, animal noise which took her aback, even in pain as she was.

She kneeled on the floor, bent in two, in foetal position, when again pain run through her, but this time she managed to control her voice, and wanted to cry, but she couldn’t, as no tears would come out of her eyes. The pain was so intense, so lasting, that the five minutes this continued were to Nat like an hour: but it did end, leaving her exhausted, on the floor, in a cold sweat…she lay there for quite a while, not even able to feel panic anymore, so consumed by the pain she had been. She lost consciousness then, and there was really nothing she could do about that…still strangely lucid, the last thought she recalled was that this was her death, she was watching her death.

But she did wake up…feeling nauseous again. It wasn’t as bad as it had been, and as she stood up she realised that she could walk freely, so she grabbed some clean clothes, brushed her hair and refreshed her face-so pale! –ready to go to hospital, for a full examination and maybe a solution to this problematic illness.

“It’s most likely a case of exhaustion, brought by intense study and a very rich schedule…I see here, Natalie, that you are one of you’re the top students at your institution” the doc, a young doctor who happened to be on turn at A & E, kept studying Nat’s tongue and eyes, checking the colour of her membranes.

Some pressing on her pulse and a reassuring smile.

“Your blood pressure is low, and, I maybe wrong, but I’m almost certain, there is a lack of iron…have you had fainting spells lately?”

Nat felt frustration coming up: there was something distinctly patronising about the medic, his blond preppy looks betraying a good university and a lot of daddy’s money…she could smell, faintly, some good cologne on him. She wondered if doctors were supposed to wear cologne at work.

“The thing is, I was perfectly healthy until two days ago. Then…this. What I am most concerned is the blood, I don’t understand what may have cause to throw up blood” she swallowed and winced. Very mildly, but she had still occasional cramps in her stomach.

“It is indeed worrying, but it seems that it was an isolated case. Besides, are you a hundred per cent sure that was blood?”

“I could taste it in my mouth!” she said exasperated. Why didn’t he believe her? Why did he think she was a drunken student recovering from a boozy week end, the way he probably did in the old days at uni?

“As I said, it is cause of concern. At present, from what I can see, yours may be a straight forward case of just lightening the workload and taking it a little bit easier on the study and other fronts…”

Again! She felt beaten. The doctor continued, barely noticing the creased expression on her face.

“…what I would suggest, Natalie, is that you stay a couple of days with us, in complete rest, so that we can keep an eye on you. Meanwhile, I will take a few samples of urine and blood so we can check iron values and any anomalies in general..”

Anomalies. He was checking her for drugs! Oh this was great help indeed…but, if indeed there was a problem, they would find out. She was feeling marginally better, the nausea having subsided, some strength gradually returning, but the off feeling still there.

“…a combination of reduced stress and rest should do the trick, Natalie. I’ll send a nurse to take the relevant samples. Anything else, any concerns, let me know Nat, we are here to help.” He was about to say something else but Nat broke in.

“Well there is a concern. This has all started after I had… an encounter with another student.’

The doctor’s expression said to her that this was confirming his prejudice. He nodded.

Nat’s voice was pitched a bit higher now, making her sound almost strident.

“Look, I know this may sound crazy but…he left me these marks here, on the neck” she showed the almost healed bite near the jugular. ”It isn’t fully visible now, here are the pictures I have taken…” she produced the digital camera, and showed the doctor.

He examined the mark and the pictures, attentively, not a hint of irony on his face: he was suddenly very serious.

“Do you know this student well?”

Oh God, this was the inquisition. She paused, then, resigned she answered, seeing where this was going.

“No”

The doctor appeared vaguely troubled now.

“Well, you see, there are quite a few nutters around and this is something very strange indeed. If he has produced such wound on you, I may be inclined to say that you are rather lucky to be here talking to me, now”

Clarity returned to her mind, in the wake of this unpleasant reality. Maybe he was right, after all…she did not know Roland at all and he might be a blood fetishist or something…she sat there, her face devoid of any feeling, any rebellion at this point, accepting the doctor’s view more and more.

She snapped out of it.

“Anyway, Natalie, I’ll organise for samples as soon as possible and we shall see that your system is not affected in any way. I’ll go call the nurse so that this can be done. I’ll be back with you as soon as the results come, so we can discuss any course of action.”

Nat nodded, internally agreed and tossed her head on the other side, observing, spent, the view out of the window.

She knew well somewhere that the doctor’s view was limited and tainted, but she didn’t have the strength, the will to fight it: besides she was as puzzled and as confused as he was, except that he was attempting to give this whole illness a logical explanation, and the only way to do that was to assume that there was more to this story than met the eye, e.i. a drunken night or else.

He was right: there was otherwise no logical explanation for what was happening to her, but this strange thing, she knew, was the truth.

In the following hours, she emptied her bowels many times over, to the point that there was nothing left in: the sense of nausea had gone, but she was very pale indeed. She felt well again, on some level, although something very distinct, very weird, was happening to her, she could clearly sense that: she didn’t know what. She felt also, as the hours passed, an increasing sense of detachment, an absence of fear which she found in herself rather peculiar, as she did tend to be a relatively anxious individual: she dealt with that organizing her life in perfect order. Was she worried in the least about her studies, the papers, uni…the future? She found peculiar that she could remember what it felt to be anxious, but she wasn’t…what was happening to her? She felt… detached. Where was Roland? What had happened three nights ago? Because, whatever the doctor may say, something must have happened then.

What, she could not comprehend: she did need to speak to Roland. He might be a dangerous fetishist, and in that case she had to alert others, the uni, the police, do something…she needed to speak to him first, to gather the truth from his own lips, a truth he would freely disclose or the one he would conceal, with his words, but betray with his gestures. She was good at reading people. She would know only then.

The doctor found her quiet in her room, that evening: there was not much to add, the results were all average and there was no underling cause of worry, according to her blood and urine readings.

“The only thing I would check if I were you in the future” he said neutrally “is your iron levels. They are, as it is, pretty low on a normal scale, the minimum requirement being 12…you being a 13.”

Nat listened, unaffected.

“…this might indicate a dietary deficiency-often vegetarians have this problem, as they don’t eat red meats- or a more problematic structural deficiency…in any case, I have prescribed some iron tablets for you so to avoid any possible problems. All you will need to do is have a good rest, take it easy…and take a course of these tablets. I will examine you in one month’s time, to monitor the situation.”

He was, in the dim light of the room (she only had the table lamp on) -and devoid of the arsehole attitude- rather handsome. Surely he did the best he could to do his job properly…gone was the underlying patronising questioning and the rest: he had probably found no alcohol in her blood.

“Thank you doctor….”

“Sam, please call me Sam… Mcdowell.” He indicated the tag on his coat, and smiled.

“Thank you, Sam” she managed a smile, sincerely grateful.

“What I would suggest, Natalie, is that you stay here tonight and we’ll discharge you. How do you feel about that?”

Nat looked thoughtful for a second, then spoke.

“Ok…but I still don’t understand what happened to me…I feel ok now though.”

“Sure…well, I cannot tell you what happened because it is a mystery to us as well, Nat, in all sincerity…medicine doesn’t have all the answers. Sometimes all we can do is help and try to alleviate. Said this, I would still like to monitor you in the next month or so, to be on the safe side.”

“Sure” she smiled.

He smiled back and after tossing all his papers together, he stood up, about to leave.

“I better …go now. It’s going to be a long night for me. You sleep well.”

“Are on turn on the ward?” she asked.

“Yep!” he said faking a happy smile, in a comical effect.

She laughed. He wasn’t such an arsehole after all.

“I’ll see you tomorrow” and he left the room, leaving behind him an intense scent of musk…was it musk? It was delicious.

And that was it, Sam walked through the long corridor, silence in the ward, the quiet balbbering of the tv in some of the room: all was generally quiet.

Hopefully it will stay like that, he muttered to himself, he really could do with an interrupted sleep, he had worked for 12 hours now, it had been a long turn: still the night to come. So it is, the destiny of the junior doctor.

His room was small, a cubicle, but it had all one needed for a decent sleep and it was wide enough not to give one a claustrophobic feeling: he could have slept in a box, if asked, at this point.

Obviously, he could not wear a pyjamas, but he abhorred wearing clothes in bed, it was a matter of personal hygiene: he took everything off but his Calvin Klein undies (cute on his well formed butt) and a white t-shirt.

He checked his teeth and attended at his personal routine before collapsing on the fresh bed, for some due sleep.

Maybe a couple of hours had passed, maybe three: enough time by any rate to allow Sam to fall into a slow rhythmic deep sleep. She, for some reason, knew, likewise she knew where he was…was it his scent, the musk, she was following? She knew. She passed, barefooted, feeling no cold or else, through the deserted corridors, in the dim neon light that graced this hospital like any other.

She knew where he was. She kept walking, very silently, until she found a door which bore his imprint…the door was of course locked, like it should be, although it magically gave in when she applied what seemed minimal pressure: she knew it mustn’t be so, because a locked door is a locked door, nonetheless, she continued her journey, merely observing what was happening. It was as if, her own old self, which she felt was dying, was watching the new self act and feel and…she closed the door behind her. She could see perfectly in obscurity.

“Doctor…doctor…” she whispered as she approached his lone little bed, where he was dreaming the night away…she might have found him attractive-when?- she merely saw his well formed muscles and the strong body, which was host to a rather healthy life force…she watched him, fascinated. She blew some air on his face, while whispering, again, a number of times, until he came back from a deep sleep, disturbed in his rest and puzzled, as much, to see… Natalie? What the…?

She giggled….she didn’t know what took hold of her, or why she found him so funny as being startled, but she giggled…and provocatively, with a really naughty look in her eyes, she took her top off, exposing a pair of tits that were so perk and peachy they seemed unreal: which he had a full view of as he had rushed to switch the table lamp on. Gosh, she was dead pale, or was it the light?

He was about to say something when she laughed again, this time sitting on the floor, her legs bent and kind of open, her arms back wards, then she put her index finger in her mouth and started licking it like a lollypop: he was entranced, for the inappropriateness of this spectacle in first place, but also and mainly for the transformation Natalie Warren had undergone. She looked in all like the person he had spoken to, but she moved and acted totally out of character-not that he knew her well, but he had put her down as a pretty bookworm who got hammered by a brush with college life- in a way or the other, not this sexy nymph who was attempting to seduce him…but he didn’t have the time, neither to say something nor physically remove her from his sleeping quarters, which he was going to do next.

Nat, with an impossibly fast movement, had grabbed his throat and sank her teeth in it, lustfully: he was unable to move a muscle, as if paralysed by her bloodsucking: moreover, he felt, gradually but surely, his strength and lucidity abandon him…he could smell, blood…it was his blood. She was gorging on it.

She sucked until he died: she knew he was dead because his heart was not beating anymore…had she meant to kill him? God no! Had she meant all of that? Sucking blood, is, for a vampire, the ultimate experience: a young vampire can hardly control their senses once started…he looked ghastly, empty.

Nat felt satiated, full and could feel his life force running through her, be her.

Calmly, with a calm she had not known in her human life, she cleared her mouth of any blood: calculatingly, she took a uniform and a pair of shoes found in the closet of the room, which was used by many doctors and staff, she also took his beeper and his badge.

“Sam” she said aloud, as if reflecting on what had just happened. Yes, what was that? She was almost pleased to discover that she didn’t give a damn. She exited the room, as composed as if nothing of notice had really happened- it hadn’t, no-one had noticed…She found the exit to the hospital, through lifts and corridors, and nodded politely when the guard saluted, her badge well in sight, Dr Sam Mcdowell, finishing her turn…she laughed inwardly, at the happy coincidence. Oh well, not that an exit wouldn’t have been possible otherwise, but this one was spectacular…a name which could be both a female or male name.

Alone, in the middle of the night she walked leisurely towards the uni’s dorm, where she would find her old room, with her old things.

Shattered Part 5

Widowmaker attempts to break free from Talon.

( From all povs.. Lena is not overly friendly to begin with. I shall be uploading here, continoulsy editing and eventually when I’m far enough ahead on Ao3.) 

You can find Parts 1 - 4 under the shattered runephoenix6769 tag. If not i can just reupload. Enjoy.) 

                                        Shattered Part 5

Pushing open the door that would lead to the female communal showers, the ex RAF pilot was greeted by a wall of steam and the heady aroma of cleanliness and wafts of feminine scented shampoos.  It was a reprieve from the stench that still lingered in her nostrils and Lena was convinced had got into the lining of her clothes and hair.

Dumping her wash bag onto the bench,  she swiftly removed the chronal accelerator with practiced ease, stashing it into the specifically created water proof charging dock before the fine mist of minuscule droplets could play havoc with the inner electronics, safe in the notion that Winston would have considered such an eventually especially with her penchant for traipsing the streets of an usually over cast London and taken steps to incorporate it into the design of the life grounding  equipment’s design, it still paid to be cautious.

With a shaky breath, she checked the connection to ensure it was charging correctly and that the seals hadn’t corroded in the often damp atmosphere before punching in her personal code to insure its security.

Her personal locker not more than a few feet away, was sandwiched between Zarya’s and Mei’s, whose remained empty. Lena ran her finger over the piece of scotch tape with her name written in sharpie checking the adhesive. It has been left in the hope of the off chance that the Eco Point operative would change her mind and return to the fold. Peeling at the edges, it would need replacing soon. Lena noticed DVa Nano cola stickers had been added to the collection of pink butterflies and decals of Lucio’s frog, a sign that not only she missed the climatologist’s chipper demeanour.

Letting out a small sigh, she turned the dial of the locker giving it an extra wiggle when it stuck on the number 7 as it always did.  It’s not like she didn’t understand Mei’s trepidation at answering the recall, being left out in the cold by the International organisation was something they both had in common but the glaring difference, Lena had Winston who had worked tirelessly in his own time, risking court martial in a bid to bring her home safely, Mei on the other hand had woken up to the realisation that Eco Point and their team had been forgotten entirely in the fall. Lena couldn’t imagine what it must have been like waking up to find her team mates dead, trapped and with no hope of escape as they suffocated in their pods.

Similar to a cockpit.  Tight. Sucking in oxygen from the tank. Enclosed and inescapable    

Hands fading in and out of existence as fingers tried to grasp the eject button, gasping for air, fists banging on the cockpit’s encasing . Lena’s hand instinctively lashed connecting with the bottom left hand corner of the locker door. Dented from the repeated action of over the years, it popped open.

“Are you ok my little peroskie” came the low toned voice.

Lena blinked, quickly flicking a bright smile on her face to look at the towering form of the Russian Weightlifter; Lena barely came up to her chest.

“Sorry, didn’t hear you come in there.”

Zarya deadpanned, in broken English,

“In Mother Russia, the element of surprise is needed to hunt Omenics. All Russians are silent. We don’t cry when we come out of mother’s womb!”

Lena scanned the Russian’s face for a hint of a lie, finding none, she breathed in wonderment,

“Cor, blimey. Really?”

Zarya broke out into a booming laugh that echoed with the acoustics of the locker room,

“No!” a bear sized hand landed on the pilot’s shoulder causing the much smaller woman to slightly buckle under the weight.  Zarya shook her head, “British so gullible.”

Water trickled in divlets along the grooves of the sculptured muscles, from Zarya’s neck, glistening on their journey along her bicep before dripping from her elbow and splashing with a little plink on the tiles. Zarya quirked an eyebrow and gave a polite cough. A flush of heat rose to Lena’s cheeks.

“Im .. Im .sorry.” her fingers reaching out, “Your biceps are the size of my thighs!”

Zarya’s grin widened and she flexed her biceps for show, nodding in permission for the younger woman to touch them. Lena tried to circle both hands round the bulging muscle and found her fingers too short.  The Russian began to flex in body builder poses, turning this way and that. She turned to show off her back muscles only for the towel to slip down completely. Unashamed, Zarya turned giving Lena a full frontal eyeful. The pilot threw up her hands and closed her eyes, squealing,

“Jesus Christ!”

Zarya stood hands on her hips, revealing in her glory and teasing Lena’s reaction.

“Do you not like the female form? “ She theatrically boomed.

“Yes! Yes!” Lena hurriedly replied whilst trying not to laugh at the ridiculousness. “Just put something on!”

The Athlete let out another rolling jovial laugh as she retrieved her towel and wrapped  it back around herself.

“You feel better now?”

Lena returned it with a genuine smile and a nod,

“Thanks.”

The two women settled into a comfortable silence as they got changed, Lena stripping down to her underwear and stuffing her clothes unceremoniously in to her locker. Retrieving her wash bag, she felt Zarya ruffle her hair as she passed.

“Come, find me when finished reports. Help me take Cowboy’s money in card game, da?”

Once more Lena gave the chornal accelerator dock the once over, testing the handle and double checking that the line of code continued to play in a loop flashing on the interface.

“Yeah, as long as you promise to challenge Reinhardt to an arm wrestle.”

“Done. German knight no match for Russian Bear!”

With a grin Lena slipped into the shower room to the sounds of another booming laugh.

  Making quick work of her shower and dropping off her dirty uniform on the way, Lena was finally able to relax in the safety of her room. The life grounding piece of equipment, once again, was safely stashed in its charging dock not a few feet from where she sat at her desk in her shorts and baggy hoodie.

“Athena, be a luv and turn on the holopad.”

“Of course Lena.”

Whilst she waited for her holopad to come to life she stretched out from her seat yanking on a mini fridge door, blindly searching  it’s depths until her fingertips grazed the familiar shaped neck of a bottle. Balancing precariously she continued to struggle to find purchase, cursing under her breath as she heard the glass bottle tip over rattling against the tray. Slowly she teased it forward by her finger nail in the bottle lid, finally coaxing it into a position whereby she could grasp it.  Happy she pushed the fridge door closed with a foot whilst simultaneously unscrewing the cap off the large bottle of Bishop’s Finger.

Taking a huge gulp of the cool bubbly liquid she praised good old fashioned home brewed British red ale. Resting one foot on the edge of the chair, she relaxed back rubbing out the kinks in her neck. After all these years she thought she would be used to the extra added weight of the accelerator and she was, until she took it off and realised just how much lighter she felt, sometimes swinging round and continuing on an often unexpected trajectory .

“May I enquire as to the mission? All went well?” Asked the A.I.

“Yeah, after a fashion I suppose.”

Stretching up until her breast bone cracked and the muscles in her shoulders gave the tell tall sound of grating together, Lena made a mental note to ask Zarya who her competition masseuse was as she was in dire need of the kinks to be worked out. The last time she had ignored it had been at her own peril, not wishing a repeat of a trapped nerve resulting in sleepless nights, handfuls of painkillers and anti-inflammatories and being bumped off the roster until Angie gave her the all clear.

The tinkling music of the holopad coming to life almost caused her to startle.

“Athena. Can you pull up a report form?”

Taking another much needed sip, her eyes danced across the light screen.  In a strip across the bottom international news headlines played in a loop. The top left hand corner the roster played over as to personnel   away on mission, who was on active on base, who was on downtime. The little icon next to Lena winked green, DVa’s and Zarya’s green with a line through.  Lucio’s red with a line through. Mei’s remained dormant, permanently grey.  Lena had witnessed it flicker green once with an X through it meaning the climatologist had been using the system somewhere in the world and had no wish to be disturbed.

The report template appeared on the screen as Lena took another gulp of beer. Swiftly her fingers tap danced across the keyboard filling in relevant information such as mission code, clicking a drop down menu adding the names of the operatives in attendance, fuel and equipment used.  Her fingers paused in mid-air when she came to equipment collected.

Her eyes flittered round the room before coming to rest on the gun case haphazardly tossed on the spare bed Lena often used as a wash basket and extra storage, a room to herself one of the many perks of being a Specialist Agent.

Under ‘Retrieval’, she began to type only to furiously hit the back space button.  Sitting back again, she absently mindedly took a sip as her eyes focused intently on the gleaming state of the art case.  

Overwatch headquarters having a state of art damping field for any such beacon or tracking device, she had in her haste to get out of her sweaty and stinking uniform put no thought to the weapon she had so excitedly retrieved.  

It couldn’t hurt to look, could it?

Better to be sure that Talon hadn’t somehow found cutting edge technology that could circumvent Athena’s protocols. By all means that pesky Talon hacker Sombra could have found a way.

It was her duty to check wasn’t it? Just in case.

Leaving the bottle on the table, she used her toes to scoot the chair over, the wheels spinning and threatening to go in any direction.  

Pulling the case closer, she turned it over this way before examining the clasps and giving them a quick flick to reveal its treasures within.

Nestled beside Widowmaker’s famous grappling hook gauntlet, the gun gleamed.

Widow’s Kiss.

She doubted is was named that out of any sort of sentimentality on Widowmaker’s part, more than likely some sort of dark gallows humour, if the woman was capable of such things.

Reaching out, she hesitated, her hands hovering over the sleek weapon. The light playing over the hues of black and intermingled purple coating the metal gave it the quality of a living breathing thing.

How would she feel if someone got their grubby little hands on her trusty twin pulse pistols?

Her excitement getting the best of her, she unhooked the straps that kept it in place before teasing it out of its nest.  It was deceptively light, given the information Overwatch had gleaned that it also housed a sniper rifle barrel somewhere in its mechanics.

Fitting it snug under her arm, she gave it a few experimental swings.  Suddenly she jumped up, enjoying the feeling of the weight, hefting it until she found a comfortable way to cradle it. Getting a good grip on the stock and holding it firm against her shoulder, she peered down the sights and the barrel.

She had been on the end of that muzzle intent on snuffing her out of existence plenty of times. And once in Numbani she had held it in her hands, firing it and instantly regretting the recoil, but in the heat of the skirmish she hadn’t had the time to admire the craftsmanship, only wonder how someone who looked so statuesque yet frail could expertly wield such a thing.

Turning she caught her reflection in the long mirror on her wardrobe door. Correcting her stance she admired her reflection, attempting to sound seductive and intimidating in a mock French accent,

“Foolish girrrrl.”

She stepped to one side, only to jump back in front of the mirror,

“Mwaa ha, ha, baguette, hon, hon, croissant!”

She let out a snort of laughter at herself in her tiny shorts, oversized hoodie with one of the most feared weapons in the world in her tiny hands and against her slender frame.

In heady excitement her finger tips began to feel out all the tiny nodges, searching for the trigger mechanism that would open up Widow’s Kiss in all its beauty.  Noting the difference, she was sure she had found the culprit. To press it was so tempting but she would look like a daft bint if once she had the sniper rifle unfolded she wouldn’t be able to get it back in. Who knew what protocols would be in place? For all she knew it might self-destruct reducing her and Watchpoint Gibraltor to nothing more than a crater. Thinking better of it she carefully placed it on the bed, making sure the muzzle was pointed at the wall.

Instead she turned her attentions to the piece of equipment that made the Talon assassin glide through the air and cut soldiers in half. If Widow’s Kiss was sleek and sophisticated, the grappling gauntlet came off as industrial by comparison.  Positioned in the all at once soft but solid packing foam, it looked to Lena that to remove it one had to slip the arm into the gauntlet’s wrist hold and pull.  It’s dull grey exterior belied its predatory allure as Lena slipped her forearm into the wrist hold. Fastening it as tight as it would go she found the interior against her skin surprisingly soft and snug. The pilot gave it an experimental tug only for the full case to follow her and hang uselessly.  Holding it steady with her other hand, she tugged again only for this time the foam came slightly loose from its corners.

A tiny piece of white caught Lena’s eye. Peeking out from one of sides, caught between foam and steel of the guncase was the small edge of something . Taking off the gauntlet, Lena used her thumb and forefinger to fish out the curious object. Finally working it loose and pulling it from its hide out, she let out a small gasp.

Only the old fashioned and rich used film stock, everyone else preferring digitalised photo frames that played a number of images on a loop or the more modern holo frames that played snippets of video that back in the ancient internet days were referred to as gifs.

Turning it over in her hands, her eyes roved the image.  Recognising Gérard, she dropped it as if burned. Never taking her eyes of the photograph, she slumped in the chair.

The last time she had seen him had been just before the Slipstream test flight. Being a mentor and a friend, he had drawn her into a one armed hug, telling her how proud he was of her, that she had this in the bag. That he had been rooting for her to be the one picked out of all the hopefuls from the start and no other pilot had been more deserving. That morning something in her gut had told her something was off and she parted her pre-flight jitters he had reassured her, steadying her by giving her a quick nip of schnapps out of a hip flask he called Dutch courage and she had joked that was it because the French didn’t have a word for courage? He had given her a playful cuff over the ear and with one arm slung over her shoulders  walked beside her as the tannoy called out that the test was about to start.  As she had settled herself in the cockpit she had flashed him a quick thumbs up before he had turned walking back into the darkness of the flight hanger, neither knowing it would be the last time they saw each other.

By the time Lena had returned, Gerard Lacroix was dead, said to be killed in the line of duty.  

Gerad’s death wasn’t something that was discussed much and if it was it was done in hushed tones. Rumours had flown rife at the cadets canteena . A Talon operative had snuck like a viper into his home, murdering him and his Prima ballerina wife in their sleep. Eventually as Lena had worked her way up the ranks and her clearance had been changed accordingly, the story had taken a different twist.  

One that the Londoner wasnt entirely privy to.

With shaky fingers and heart pounding in her chest she retrieved the photograph. Treating it with care and reverence she re-examined the image. A happy husband and wife on their wedding day, Gerad looking dashing and handsome in his tuxedo smiling down at a stunningly beautiful woman nestled into him, proudly showing off her wedding ring. Lena recognised the elegant and fine features. She had been up close and personal enough, usually trading blows and those pouty lips pulled back in a sneer ridiculing her.

There`was no mistaking it, the woman in the photograph was Widowmaker.  

She had heard snippets of the sad tale of caution.  She was aware that Anglea and Gerard’s wife had been close. That’s for years they had assumed his wife dead. That Widowmaker had been responsible for the ‘death’ of Ana Amari. Beyond that it was a relative wall of silence shrouded in mystery.

Scooting back across the floor, Lena reached for the bottle of beer taking a sip.

“Athena.”

“Yes Lena.”

“Pull up everything you have on Gerad Lacroix, namely to do with Talon Operative Widowmaker.”

Her thumb lightly brushed over the face of the blushing bride in thought.  Why would Talon’s top assassin keep this? This physical form of a happy memory?  A tangible part of her past?

“Sorry luv, could you add anything to do with Amelie Lacroix to the search?”

“That could take some time Lena.”

Clearing a space on her magnetic organiser she trapped the photograph to the board with a Beefeater fridge magnet.

“Don’t worry luv, I’ve got plenty of time.”

A chatbox pinged in the top left hand corner.

~~ She-Bear~ @FlyBoi  “Weak Cowboy man dare me to a wrestle with mechanical arm. Come watch Russian Muscle crush robot reliance.”

~~DVaInternational~~ @FlyBoi. Lena where are you? McCree is in as idiot. Im gonna live stream it~~

Lena grinned at the invitation, typing out a hasty reply.

~~FlyBoi~~ @She-Bear @DvaInternational. Lemme  finish this an I’ll be over. Don’t start without me!~~

Quickly her fingers flew over the keypad, noting time and date. Describing the mission, she left out the parts about Fareeha and Angela butting heads. She catalogued the guncase and gauntlet and left out the hidden memento. Satisfied she hit copy, save and send taking pains to make sure she had one copy in her personal folder and all T’s were crossed and I’s dotted.

Quickly she got changed, swapping out her shorts for comfy pants, and slipping into her chronal accelerator before secreting it under an oversized zip up hoodie.  Tugging on a pair of ked’s she checked Athena’s progress and setting her own chatbox icon to green with a line through indicating she was available but off duty. Carefully she returned the Talon operatives gun back to the gun case, checking it was secure. One last look at Athena’s progress she grabbed the case before flicking off the light and dashing out the door.

Eriey light bathed Lena’s messy room in its glow. In the top left hand corner the personal roster continued to update. Mei’s grey notification flickered in quick succession coming alight in bright green,  X flashing before  disappearing and turning into a line.

Tag list: @ask-barkiplier-rp @undocumented-terriaki @penpaulkon6 @supersepticsteph

Why hasn’t Google visited Bing?

Google is sat at his workstation, as the Host enters the Googles’ computer lab. He doesn’t turn round or respond to the Host’s presence, certain that the Host will state his purpose here soon enough.

“The Host is afraid there’s a problem with Bing.”

Google’s fingers freeze above his keyboard, the droid turning slightly but refusing to meet the Host’s gaze. “What problem?”

“The internal life support. The Host worries that it may not be sufficient given the high level of stress that it was created under.”

Google returns to his work. “It’ll be fine.”

“The Host was just there, and Bing had a panic attack.”

Google stops typing, his fingers curling up with barely contained concern before he pushes back from his station, bringing up a communication screen so that he can message the others. “I will get someone on to it.”

“The Host thinks maybe you should see to it.”

“The others are more than capable.” Google doesn’t see the frustration in the Host’s face as he continues to message someone to check Bing’s life support.

“The Host is sorry for this.” With an exasperated sigh, the Host places a hand on the back of Google’s chair and leans in as he speaks as clearly as he is able. “Okay Google.”

Google’s system freezes instantly, the screen disappearing, and his chassis straightening as he sits up perfectly straight, his gaze going hollow as he stares helplessly at nothing.

“Of you and your brothers, who is the most qualified to reinstall Bing’s internal life support?”

“I am.” Google answers the question truthfully, as he’s programmed to do. He’s the one with the greater knowledge of the parts they’re using to restore Bing, the one with the most experience in improving robotics, the one with the greater drive to succeed the first time around, the one with the greatest motivation to bring Bing back up to operational standards.

Google’s shoulders relax, the question answered and he scowls, turning in anger, but before he can say anything, the Host speaks again.

“Okay, Google.” Google freezes again, awaiting instruction. “Why haven’t you visited Bing?”

“Because I’m malfunctioning.” Another true answer. His pre-programmed response to the ‘magic words’ which Dark had sworn no one but the two of them knew. Either Dark lied or the Host somehow got inside his head and took it out.

“Malfunctioning?”

Google glares at the Host, waiting to see if he uses those words again but the Host just waits patiently. “I feel hollow.” he says eventually. Reaching up, he taps at his chest with two fingers, just where a human’s breast bone would be. “Right here, whenever I see him.”

“Hollow...” The Host considers Google’s words as he shifts in place. The droid doesn’t have much frame of reference for emotions and is known to misinterprets them. Feeling hollow.... “...Is it possible that you feel that what happened to Bing is your fault?”

Google pushes his glasses up his nose, purposefully avoiding looking at the Host. “It is my fault.”

“Why do you say that?”

“When he was being attacked Bing kept looking to the cameras. He knows I hack them but it took me two days to even notice he was missing. I should have seen. I should have known he needed help. I could have...” Google’s voice slowly builds speed as he speaks until he realises that maybe the Host has hit on the problem. “...done something.”

The hollowness in his chest is back with a vengeance as he thinks of the moment when he saw the time stamp on the footage and Google absent-mindedly raises his hand to his chest, clutching at his shirt, and closing his eyes trying to fight it off. It is a grossly unpleasant feeling and he wants it gone.

The Host places a firm hand on Google’s shoulder, the droid turning to look at him. “There’s no way you could have possibly stopped them, even if you had seen.”

Google nods. He knows he wouldn’t have got there in time. “...But I could have tried.”

The Host sighs as he thinks on what Google’s saying, crossing his arms before he speaks again. “Okay Google.” the droid freezes once more. “Bing has never needed you more than he does right now. Go and see him.”

Without hesitation, Google gets to his feet, unable to disobey the instruction. Secretly, he’s grateful that the final decision has been removed from his hands, wanting to visit Bing all this time but always finding a reason to stay away. Now those reasons mean nothing.

Still as he passes the Host he pauses a moment.  Google’s face is stern as he taps one finger firmly against the Host’s chest. “Don’t ever use those words against me again.”

The Host stands defiant, unapologetic for what he has done, though he inclines his head slightly. “The Host promises.”

With that, Google leaves.

Individual reflective diary - Advanced game-play development

Pre-assumptions

Going into the project I had confidence. This had been built by getting good grades in the former version of this module the semester before. I respect that a lot of that grade had been down to our group as a whole so I knew that I needed to contribute more this time around and was ready to do so. Given the prompts that our games had to follow, platforming or racing game, I was struggling to find any creativity towards the concepts as they felt somewhat restrictive.

For the racing game we could make a fun kart game in the style of Mario kart / Crash team racing, or a serious simulation attempt in the style of Forza. The impact to creativity came in that a simulation type game had to be good. It had to play well, look good and spark a certain amount of competitivity. A standard that I wasn’t sure of how to achieve and a prompt that didn’t entirely excite me, as I am not interested in such games personally.

The karting style game did offer more freedom and an opportunity for a type of game I was familiar with. The only issue I faced was that it has been done so many times and so well that anything we made would come across, at least to me, as a generic knockoff. Many big-name series have delved into this sub-genre, I mentioned crash team racing, and many have felt like generic re brands of Mario kart because it did it so well so early. It would be impressive for any of us to some up with new ideas for the genre or new ways to do things, so we would essentially just be compiling all the best bits of those games and that to me felt cheap.

Luckily for me the group I found myself in already wanted to make a platforming game. Again I felt the platforming genre left little in the way of new invention but it was far less restrictive than a racing game. That being said, it would be difficult to create something now that is completely new and unseen in any genre, so perhaps the issue lies with me in that I’m simply not so creative in that department and my talents are better executed elsewhere.

Due to the fact that I joined the group a week later than the initial ‘get into groups’ session (see why in week by week diary) I was more than accepting of just tagging on and helping where they needed, rather than joining later and asserting my ideas on a team that already had a start.

To summarise my assumptions, I felt that we could make a good to great project depending on what team I landed in, especially considering my lessons from first semester about being more pro-active. And I also felt the options of racing game or platforming game were unpopular picks but I understand that they were maybe picked intentionally to get us to build outside of our comfort zones.

 Week by week diary

I will preface this diary by saying that I am compiling it come the end of the project, as that is how I tend to tackle these documents. This being said not all of the details will be to the correct week, I may miss things entirely or not have the correct amount of weeks total. I will be conversing with my group about what they remember so I get as much detail as possible. I recognise that actually doing this week by week would have been a much better approach and something I will carry forward into future projects.

Week One:

Week one was the introduction to our semester module and outlining what exactly we would be making. As mentioned in the pre-assumptions the prompts didn’t excite my creativity. When asked to get into groups and discuss ideas I elected to stay separated and go over ideas on my own. Understandably this was a bad idea because I had no one to bounce ideas off which did restrict me. Overall this was due to my own lack of comfort in approaching other people which is something I know needs work if I’m to progress in any work environment, never mind just this course. I left this session still not in a group but that would be corrected in the next week.

Week Two:

This next week focused on the third person controller, a vital part of what we were doing as this would be our first module that focused on a third person game. At the end of this lecture I approached the tutor as to get help being assigned to a group, there were a few of us in the same situation. Luckily there was a group at the front of class at the same time as me composed of some people I had talked to and knew a little so I said that I could join their group while the other people without groups former their own. They accepted this and brought me up do speed with their ideas and I offered to help out where they needed me.

We were set up in Scrumwise by out tutor so that we could accurately manage our project and get some practice in working in an agile manner. We got started by setting out some tasks to complete for the next week and added them to our Scrumwise page.

Week Three:

Over the past week I had been working on my parts of the project. I offered to work on a game UI as I had made on in the previous module and was familiar with it so I could do it quite easily. Despite not having access to last semester’s project for reference, it ended up very similar. I followed what I remembered and rebuilt it for this game, changing the font and stylising it more appropriately while keeping the functionality.

On top of this I figured out a spawning system that would work for detecting when the player had fallen and a basic checkpoint system that would change the player’s spawn point for when they did fall. This was all very basic and was built in a test setting just to know that it worked in practice and in theory. We were working in separate unity files so later down the line we would have to compile everything we built as individuals but for now this was the only method that we had.

Coming into class this week I had completed I believe all but one or two things I had been tasked with and had marked them all off as complete on Scrumwise. Most the rest of the group had done the same in finishing their required parts but had neglected the Scrumwise aspect, something that would persist over the coming weeks when outside of the lecture room.

We concluded the session by assigning more roles to work on for the next week and updating Scrumwise accordingly.  I didn’t have much else to work on because I had made a faster start to the project than my peers, which at this stage wasn’t an issue and I feel more of a positive reflection on my own drive to get work done rather than a negative reflection on their approach, as they were still making good work.

Week Four:

Around this week it became clearer that we would not be able to keep up with managing Scrumwise. We would add tasks once a week when we met in class but other than that our page went untouched and as a result, come the next week and the end of the sprint it would show that we had completed no work, when in reality we were on par with the module, just out of touch with documenting it.

I believe it was also this week that we had a quick exercise in class to showcase how certain demand from higher up the chain can result in often ridiculous changes to a game. This was to get us to think about how we could make our games in such a way that they were adaptable and still simple. We sat down and went over core mechanics of our game, what we wanted everything to do and how we were going to achieve that as simply as possible.  I believe this lecture helped us to streamline our project and focus on what was important rather than going off and trying to implement too many things and have to remove them later for time’s sake.

 Week Five:

Another week went by while neglecting Scrumwise and at this point we decided after a conversation with our tutor that we would be dropping it going forward as it didn’t gel with our style of managing a project. I realise that it is an important tool and adapting to agile is important especially in this line of work, however at this stage of our development it isn’t vital and I have time to practice and adapt in projects I work alone and in projects next year. This was more a decision to make sure that we could tackle this project to the best of our abilities without added pressure or distractions of managing this page. Our solution was to have one of us write down each person’s tasks for the week and check back in at the scrum meeting the next week. Simple but effective.

Sometime over next couple of weeks would be our internal testing, or at least a smaller version in the class rather than a public setup, so we needed to knuckle down and get our versions compiled as up to now we had all still been working separately. I offered to compile our work and set to work on that. We had a small test area set as a lava filled cave that I took and used to create a small demo area with. I added a player that another tutor helped me acquire that had animations, some pillars to jump between, I added my menu UIs and a checkpoint.

I had added everyone’s scripts but didn’t know how they worked and figured it would be quicker if they could get them working themselves, as they already knew how they worked. So I sent the version over to our shared google drive and said to work on it for the next week. This didn’t happen. Come the internal testing session some of us arrived late and communication had been particularly poor from certain members so it was unclear if we even had a demo version beyond what I had sent over nearly a week ago.

Throughout the session I tried to develop on what I had built and in the meantime the rest of the group took the initiative and compiled a better version that was used as a demo and as far as I recall seemed to go down very well with test audiences.

Week Six:

This week was fairly straight forward. In class we had an exercise involving various physical puzzle toys. This was to get us to think about the fundamentals, what made it fun and such. Using this we applied ideas to our own game and managed to whittle it down so that it removed unnecessary parts and streamlined the experience and the production to only factor what was important.

Week Seven Onward:

I say ‘week seven onward’ because it was around this point that the current global situation reached a point that it affected our ability to continue the project as we were. This disrupted our workflow to pretty much a stop and for at least two / three weeks nothing was developed. Communication became non-existent and only once online lectures started again did we hear from each other as we got back into working.

One member of the group took initiative and built a game world, all assets included, that we used to develop the final version of the game. The game world was different to what we initially had planned but still fell under our plans, more closely resembling a middle level we had planned rather than the first stage. However we decided to call this a demo version and just showcase this as a level. Had global events not happened and we could work as normal this would be level two of three.

Following from the level being built I took over and downloaded it from our google drive and added my work. This came with some issues. Uploading and downloading files from the google drive didn’t work flawlessly and only after about four uploads could I download a version that was up to date and without errors. From this I took a week to make sure everything I added was working and that I wouldn’t need to add anything else in the future. I should explain that at this point we decided to just include everything we already had made and focus more on document rather than creating more moving parts to the game. This was down to the fact that we had just over a month and a half before the updated deadline and advice from tutors was to do so. With the fact that we got good feedback from the internal testing and that the game artifact is now worth less to the module we felt this would be an okay route to take.

As of now I have uploaded my work to the game and sent it to the google drive so that the rest of my team can add their sections and complete it, though that was over a week ago and I am unsure of any developments. Next week we aim to be done with the game itself and focus solely on documentation. One member of the group has been in charge of the design document until now so I am eager to get hands on the document and go over it so that I’m confident of its standard. Beyond that we need to work on the presentation and then we should be done with the project.

From here on in I will be keeping an actual week by week diary until the work has been submitted, with updates being written after every Monday as that is when we elect to meet, after arranged lectures and tutor check ins. Looking at the module brief the dates for week to week breakdown only go as far as the original deadline, therefore any further weekly diary entries will come under a title “WFH” (work from home) and week one through, potentially, four, although this is over a month before the work from home order was given.

 WFH Week One:

This week’s update is short. I have finished all of my inclusion to the game artefact and am waiting on other members of the group to complete their additions as well as a copy of the current GDD. My biggest contribution of work this week has been writing this document up to this point and a start on the Individual Reflective Diary which outlines exactly what I have contributed to the project.

WFH Week Two:

Following on from a team meeting the plan is to start work now on the presentation. The document is still nearing its completion and the game artefact is being passed around for updates and compilation. Some issue keep arising in using google drive in that uploads and downloads keep failing for seemingly no reason. In future projects I will find it essential to avoid this method and highlight to the university the necessity for an investment in UnityCollab for students. Right now it’s behind a pay wall that inconveniences us yet has the potential to be an even more valuable asset then GitHub that I’m sure would improve the quality of all group-game modules the course offers.

Looking to the presentation, sections have been divided out and I will be talking about my inclusion of the checkpoint and fall trap briefly, along with my main sections of issues in development, things we cut and future plans. Having had a successful presentation last semester I have a certain confidence going into this, especially considering the current circumstances, and not having a live audiences. The only hiccup comes in recording myself and finding a good method to do so. Editing duties are left to another member of the group.

One final update is that considering my previous experience with creating a website, something my group members are inexperienced in, I will be adding all of our works to a site. This is more or less a copy paste job but nonetheless I list it as a responsibility.

 WFH Week Three:

I’m writing this update a couple of days later than I planned simply because other module commitments have been more pressing and required more of my attention. As of right now there is just over a week before deadlines.

I have the website set up for our documentation, all that requires is the completion of said documentation by other members of the group and I can update the site accordingly and chalk that off. Elsewhere I have completed writing my section of the presentation and aim to record it over the next couple of days, before I write the next update to this report.

At this stage I’m unsure of the progress of the game itself. As we have been passing it around and I’ve contributed my parts I haven’t had a need to download a latest version, though I assume additions will have been put off, though coming so close to the deadline I hope I get confirmation of progress being made. I will more than likely send reminders to everyone and make regular check-ups to see work is being done.

In terms of remaining work I have:

-          Presentation to record. (Will be sent over to another group member for editing so that takes a higher priority as to not have them waiting on me close to the deadline)

-          Website to complete. (Dependant on other group members completion in a reverse of roles from the previous point)

-          Game itself. (Dependant on other group members)

-          This report. (Will be completed with next update and post-mortem)

-          Peer assessment review. (I want to leave that as late as possible to fairly reflect all contributions)

-          Personal asset list. (Will be tagged on to the end of this report, can only be completed at the end of work as it is the compilation of my additions)

 WFH Week Four (Final):

This week progress has been better, probably with deadlines in a few days. I’ve completed my part of the presentation and sent that off to the group for editing together. Still waiting for the document to be completed so I can finish the website but work has at least been happening for the document so I’m not worried.

I’m unsure how progress is coming along for the game itself. Communication is scarce, especially between those who it falls to now. The best solace I can take is that I’ve included my work and so anything missing from the hand in version won’t be because of me. Though one bug has occurred to my part of the build but we’re all unsure where it has come from as the build, I sent off still works so all I can gather is that something that someone else has submitted is interfering. I feel at stage of development, and even last week when the bug was brought to my attention, that it’s too late to be spending valuable time on the game artefact when It could be spent elsewhere picking up more marks and creating an all-around better project.

Elsewhere I have completed the majority of what I can on my own and now just wait for collaboration with group mates for finally ticking things off the list. I have completed the peer assessment form, as mentioned the presentation, this document will be completed next as I move straight onto writing the post-mortem and directly afterwards I will fill out the personal asset list.

 Post-mortem

Overall I feel this project has been a success. There have been setbacks and moments well below standard but I believe beyond those we have worked towards a goal and achieved it.

Firstly what went wrong. From a personal view, it took me beyond the first week to get into a group which isn’t the worst thing in the world but would’ve saved some time. This is purely a reflection on my ability to approach others, I simply prefer to be placed into a group and work from that than try and sell myself to course mates I haven’t spoken to yet. Definitely something I need to work on for next year and crucially beyond.

Our communication was well below par. Personally I feel like I have done well communicating and making it to organised teams’ meetings both from tutors and group. Elsewhere however my group’s commitments have been inconsistent at best, so much that in one member’s case I’ve only heard from them once since campus closed. Even now, less than a week before the deadline, I’m not sure what said member has contributed and on a whole I’m not sure how close the game is to having everything we plan included.

Google drive has caused more problems than it has solved. Having uploads and downloads for the game be consistently corrupt for no good reason isn’t a good way to manage a project and in future will be avoided at all costs. Additionally our failure to take to Scrumwise was a detriment. The practice could have been invaluable towards next year but looking at jobs especially and is now something that I’ll either have to come to grips with in my own time or in final year.

However, on the positive side, I felt even given the extra week to get into a group that I fit in well and managed to settle down quite quickly, getting quite a bit of work done after our first scrum meeting. I ended up quite fortunate in that the idea this group had was one I could get behind. I feel that joining the group late I wouldn’t have felt right coming in and asking them to change things. And I feel that in the end I’ve become the most consistent member of the group.

Our communication was bad, but we had moments that we realised it and corrected it, even if these corrections didn’t last the rest of the semester. Some time after the closure of campus we hadn’t done much work and were drifting a bit until one member picked up some work, covered for another member too and got us back into a sort of rhythm. What I mean to say is that we didn’t communicate well, but when it was needed, we managed to. In future I’ll be making sure communication doesn’t just occur when it’s needed, so I have at least learned from this.

And it cannot be understated how valuable a tool like GitHub or UnityCollab can be to streamlining group work. I’ll be putting practice into using GitHub and requesting that the university look into funding UnityCollab availability for students.

As long as we can hand in our work and it goes beyond a pass, which I believe it will easily and significantly, then I’d say we performed well this semester. Especially considering how difficult current events have made things for all of us. I don’t know the unique situations of everyone in my group, so I have some sympathy regarding standards of commitment and I feel fortunate that we’re managing to hand in as we are.

 Personal asset list

Spawn controller script.

Menu controller script.

Main menu and corresponding linked menus.

Pause menu and corresponding linked menus.

Presentation – Mechanics: checkpoints, fog / Development: All.

Formatting of GDD onto website.

.

my mum is getting annoyed that I dont want to join in on the streets’ whatsapp quiz and bingo this week, like of course I’m not going to join in on it I’m annoyed as fuck like just yesterday I had to fish out several of my clothes from the fucking bin because she decided they were “done”, she complains all the time that I’m eating her out the house, and a whole load of other shit that you could look through my tags for. Yet she expects me to just be all cool with it now and go back to “normal” like no, that’s not how this works, she’ll yell at me for pointless shit and then the next day or even later that night she’ll be fine and try to act normal and internally I’m just like “yeah no, I’m still annoyed, fuck off and leave me alone, everything isn’t all better just because you cooled off or some shit” 

Nothing ever gets fucking processed in this house, like I haven’t trusted her with my mh ever, and I haven’t trusted her with anything serious since before I was 14, she doesn’t know shit about the stuff I’ve gone through like;

The depression causing me to miss school coupled with the anxiety of returning and having to explain and catch up on work, which turned into her yelling and hitting disciplining me instead of yknow getting me help so that became anger issues when I was 13-14, but then she would stop hitting me when it turned out I could hit back, and yet she didn’t think to get me professional help So she get my uncle a couple houses down to “help” her out but that never worked, so she got my now brother in law to “help” and when it turned out that she took me to his and my sisters house and left me so I would stay there and they would take me to school but I left my shoes in my mums car I decided to walk miles barefooted to go back to my house because that’s so normal and yet she didn’t think to get me professional help

That was when I knew I could never trust her with anything, In my 3rd year of highschool I had 30% attendence. And then I found a coping mechanism in self harm and that rose to 70% in my 4th year, she never knew about it because I would keep my arms hidden all the time and I still do to this day. She just thought I was “behaving” more now. and so she didn’t think to get me professional help.

Then in february 2012 I tried to kill myself, I failed and no one outside of my tumblr knew about it. I couldn’t tell my mum or ask for help because well, I couldn’t trust her and all the yelling and screaming had done nothing to change that over the years.

Ever since then it’s just been self harm for periods of time then stopping and thinking i’m doing better only to get worse and go back to it. My family would make comments on everytime I ate or made food and it got so bad for years that I would “eat my feelings” and I just got fatter and fatter, and now here I am the heaviest I’ve been and I have a fucking eating disorder. But that doesn’t stop my mum from constantly making me feel bad for eating

I got better with my long term girlfriend A, I was happier than normal and depression was less of a constant thing, but my anxiety was still super bad. We got together and it was great, I was in school more, I was happier, I had regular friends. And I had someone/where to escape to when I wanted away from my mum. But my anxiety never lessened and things fell apart and she broke up with me because she thought I was using her as a safety net and didn’t need to try. Now I think she’s dating the dude she kissed at the party we went to just before we broke up, nice. All our friends obviously stuck with her, one was her childhood friend fair, one was my best friend but he was in love with her sucks but understandable, and the others stayed with the group. nice

So now I’m in my 20′s,but in the years before I tried going to college for engineering bc I was pushed into in by my mum, did a year and didn’t wanna continue. So I did a year of computer science, dropped out halfway through but made a connection that became a good friend a couple years later. then I went to electrical engineering which I was forced to do, and I dropped that instantly. A year later, gf breaks up with me, and I’m starting my frist year in accountancy, still depressed, still anxious, still kinda decent weight but now i’m getting fatter and fatter since my teenage motabilism is slowing and I’m becoming an alcoholic to deal, self harm has been on and off, I’ve been threatened with homelessness more times than I can count,

This one is quick, after the split with A I became super alcoholic-y and eventually this girl I used to know from my pokemon days hit me up on twitter we got together for a little over a year, I even spent a month in vegas living with her during the summer, and a few days before new year I broke up with her. There was so much fighting in our relationship and she would emotionally manipulate me, and she’d say things like if we broke up she would never date again and all this other shit.But then my friend got me into playing siege which is how I met my current friend group of 2years now, but early on there was this discord server for all of us who played and met on the game to hang out on, there was a girl I started to like, and I brought a friend into the discord so we could all play together. She and I get super flirty and a couple months go by and we start dating, all is good but about a month goes by and my gf at the time and my current bestfriend plan to roadtrip from texas to arkansas to visit the friend I brought into the server for his birthday for a couple days, fair enough, I can’t visit but I hope they have fun, seems all good until a month later on my birthday a good friend of mine tells me that my gf and the friend I brought into the group fucked while she visited, the other friend knew nothing and was blackout for most of the partying, but it took a month to get to me. So I confront them, she admits it but is more concerned about how I found out. I confront my “friend” and he starts being apologetic until I lay into him for being a shitty friend, then he says that I should’ve expected it since it was long distance, and that he wasn’t the only one she cheated with, so that was a whole fun chapter. oh yeah, I figured she was acting sus when she hung out with guys irl so I developed paranoia for the first time and that shit sucked!!!!

I did 2 years of accountancy and I struggled at the end of the second, depresso and anxiety hit hard and I was missing classes and almost got kicked out, I stayed behind to make up work and finished a few days later than everyone with an A grade. I knew I wouldn’t be able to do a 3rd year, not that I even wanted to I was forced into this, so I tried telling my mum that I was gonna look for work and not do the third year yet, she didn’t like that and threatened to make me homeless or send to down to fucking england to livfe with the dad I text once a year. So I ssigned up to the course and got accepted, I went for a decent amount of time, but then I’d miss days, and it would get hard to catch up, so I missed more, then in december I stopped going and eventually was removed from the course. I pretended I was still going while I would just leave for hours and sit in a car park because I couldn;t take the abuse from her finding out. Eventually she did and it was a shit show, I went on benifits and then the summer I started working as a night porter.

Work was okay for the most part, except when I would set up continental breakfast buffet how the previous manager instructed me but then the morning manager would come in and I would get told off, this happened a few times before I learn to just do it for the person coming in and how they like it. Then I would deal with shitty customers who don’t know I can’t serve them booze or anything, or dealing with drunk customers pissing on the chair in the reception, or dealing with customer who get aggro when I can’t help them. Then I went on a fire safety course that taught me almost nothing about proper procedure and order of events that I should follow. Then one morning a steamy shower set off the fire alarm, I was in the restaurant which is seperate from the lodge and I couldn’t hear the alarm nor did my little buzzer go off even though it should’ve good fucking system huh and the manager evacuated the lodge, I panicked and did what I could to help. Then the GM came downstairs and said that’s why I went on the course so I could know what to do and made me feel like shit. A couple weeks later I quit becasue I couldn’[t handle that responsibility. I had some savings that I was gonna use to visit friends in america so I lived off that, but not before my family all asking me why I quit and as we know I can’t trust them because it’ll get back to my mum and I especially can’t trust her. Then my brother in law tries asking and I can’t tell him bc it will get back to my sister then to my mum, couldn’t tell my boss bc it would go from him to my other sister to my mum.

Then in january my savings are almost done, december 31st and my tooth is aching, I hopped it was rotten so I could get an infection straight to my brain to kill me, but 3 days pass and I’m in so much pain that meds don’t work, I’m over safe doses, I can’t sleep and I get super headaches that I almost pass out from. I cry in pain and eventually tell my mum who after some convincing realises how serious it is, she stays up the night, helping me phone emergency dental places or the NHS to try and get it removed. It was bad but it wasn’t infected and had no chance to kill me that way if any. She gets me a cold press and some ice to help with it and although I couldn’t get a dentist appointment until the morning she helped with it until then. I was finally feeling like this is how a mother should be, her kid crying and writhing in pain and her helping out, and I was starting to feel some trust for her for helping me when I needed her but she couldn’t help herself she had to make a snide comment that it’s because of all the fizzy juice and energy drinks that I drink. Just when I was hopeful she tears it all back. My back right top and bottom teeth get pulled, dentist was a great guy, and life went back to the same shit. I went to my benifits appointment and got signed up, I asked for an advance payment bc my mum was hounding me for money, so now my benifits are a bit lower than they should.

Then she argues with me about being late with payments even though I show her when I get paid and how much. and now we’re here, during this pandemic where the top part of this post was today. This is a good grasp of all the shit I’ve went through, it’s not everything but it’s the big stuff that I remember.......minus the whole ///R/// situation which I will likely never talk about, and now a quote from my mother which sparked me ranting instead of just about today but about my whole life

“All you do is cost me money”

Salvation S1

Why do I keep getting into shows that are likely to be cancelled!? Oh, right, because I’m a masochist. So, I’ve finished Salvation and it was so good! I’ve been internally squeeing for days, so I’ll try to get things out of my system now so I can then maybe focus on other fannish (and non-fannish) things.

(This turned out long, so I put it under the cut and tried to make it more easily readable with some bolding. My apologies to those on mobile.) 

I’ve always had a thing for doomsday premises, so this was right up my alley with an impending extinction level event that must remain secret from the general populace to avoid panic while the big shots try to prevent it.

Except that unlike a number of cheesy movies where the world comes together to save humanity and/or help each other after the disaster, Salvation creators tackled it from the other end: the whole season is set before the disaster strikes and nobody is willing to cooperate.

I found the approach refreshing and really liked it. Probably because I’m what I call a pessimistic idealist. I mean, don’t get me wrong, obviously, if such a scenario happens in real life, I do hope (or want to) that humanity would come together to save itself/the Earth. But the pessimist in me thinks there is just as much chance for us to kill each other before the Earth/space/whatever gets to us.

Although, of course, with the current political atmosphere where the orange menace and the little dumpling (you know who I mean, they don’t deserve to be named) are throwing threats with nuclear war weapons around, the cold-war-era-like hostilities in the show gave me chills.

So, there’s political power play galore while the tech wiz and co. are trying to find the way to save the world while being obstructed on every step by politicians. I liked the suspense it all brought out, and how it made the show fast paced (but didn’t take anything from complexity). I also liked all the shadiness and there was a lot of it around, as basically everyone does at least something not quite right (even if with the best of intentions).

I liked that the focus of the show is sort-of evenly spread between science and politics as well as different age groups, as in the characters in their early to mid-twenties and those around/in their forties, which I’m more into the older I get (seriously, it’s one of the biggest reality checks as to age when I realise that the character/actor(ess) is only a few years older than me, or worse, younger!)

And while I’m at that… I have a new OT3!!!! Come on, you knew this was coming, I’m that weird person who can find more or less likely OT3s anywhere and I proudly own it.

But damn it, I wasn’t looking for it! Then again I never do, you know how it goes: I don’t choose my ships, they chose me. Those three fuckers! Why am I doing this to myself? Why? *high pitched pterodactyl screeching*

I’m talking about Harris/Grace/Darius (in all variations), just to be clear. Seriously, I have no idea how it happened, but around episode 5 or 6, I was like, “well maybe instead of squabbling and ‘slight’ signs of jealousy, you could, you know, work together?” and then one thought led to another and I was like, “yeah, I could ship it, provided Harris wasn’t evil…” (I mean, he was a very, very bad boy once or twice, but turned out not to be evil) and the rest is history. *insert more swearing* Yeah, episode 8 didn’t help at all. And then of course they did work together so well towards the end of the season. *sighs*

Anyway, look, I’m not asking for much, just a S2 where they can occasionally (well, the more often the better, but I’ll take what I get) share screen time and be the badass power world/country-saving trio they are. My imagination can do the rest. ;)

But of course, IAD was promoted to a regular on Hawaii 5-O, so I’m not sure what that would mean – although Salvation is a summer show, so I guess coordination could be possible – and the ratings seem to be shit and I don’t want to get my hopes up despite the articles floating around saying not all is lost for S2. *fingers crossed*

Which brings me to a bit of ranting about a plot hole or two and a few general observations and possible S2 speculations.

a) You want me to believe that the US Secretary of Defence can just simply drive around on his own, NBD, and nobody bats an eye? FFS, even in my itty bitty country where the cabinet members really aren’t in much danger of imminent assassination, they have drivers and security details, especially the Defence Minister. It did come very handy for the plot that Harris could just drive around like it’s nobody business, though.

b) How did they get the selected 160 on site so fast? Magic? Because they couldn’t have picked them solely from Tanz personnel, since that would be mostly scientists, and they did pick historians, artists, etc…  And those would be from all around the country, I’d say. (It’s shitty enough that they would be all only Americans, like the rest of the world has no smart people to offer. Also, for genetic diversity it would be better if people were from other countries, too.)

Unless they brought them into Tanz as they picked them, before the nuclear alarm. But didn’t they finish the selection process just a day or a couple before (my memory is a bit foggy, I’ll have to rewatch)?

And nobody seemed surprised at the sight of the space-ship, so I guess they were told the actual truth or at least the Mars colonisation version beforehand? I think the second is more likely.

But, never mind, that is not even my biggest problem with the 160 and I can easily let it pass, because time on TV can work in mysterious ways (plus, maybe they cut the scenes that were supposed to clear it up.)

c) No, my biggest problem is that if 160 people are the minimum viable population, I assume those people must be able to procreate (and have healthy and diverse enough genes.) 

And so there were mostly young people in their twenties (mostly women) and thirties in the Salvation bunker. So far so good.

Of course if we only look to the continuation of human species, choosing young people makes sense.

(I’m not going into the fact that if all those youth are the best and the brightest, there would be other issues with picking people who must have been child prodigies and could therefore lack the social skills that are just as important for humanity as science – but I guess the humanities studies part of the group can compensate for what others lack in that field.) 

It also makes perfect sense that some people would be chosen for qualities other than reproductive abilities, which is where Harris and Grace come in.

I mean, men don’t have that sort of a problem, but with Zoe about to start college, Grace must be at least in her early 40s (although Jennifer is younger) since she doesn’t strike me as a teen mom, and a woman of her age has a hard time having a healthy child even in the most optimal, peaceful conditions and with the best medical treatment available, so I think it’s safe to say Grace having any more kids, especially in a couple of years, is out of the question. But that’s okay.

My problem is with Darius being disqualified on grounds of carrying the Huntington’s gene. Sure, it served as a fantastic testimony of his character that he would work on the Mars project and then this saving the mankind thing knowing that he can’t go/save himself. That’s great, what a good person!

But since other people were picked for their leadership/wisdom/merit, then why not Darius?

Did the writers forget that contraception is a thing? You know, to prevent ‘accidentally’ spreading his bad genes around? And pre-natal screening also exists (okay, IDK if they can find out about the Huntington’s gene that way, but still) – and there are doctors (I assume a few actual MDs have been picked) around to do it and in case of a positive result an abortion is an option? (But god forbid we’d even think of the A-word on a national network in the US, of course.) Or you know, just have the guy have a vasectomy, the easiest sure-fire solution. (Yeah, now I’m being mean.)

My point in short: there is no logical reason (I know, looking for logic on TV; I never learn) for Darius not to be among the 160 apart from the writers’ need for characterisation through drama.

Anyway, I think that if we get S2, it might turn out the nukes were false alarm or something, because Santiago Cabrera is first-billed and I expect they wouldn’t kill him off, so this disqualification issue will be moot.

So, if we get S2:

d) The usurping VP (why TF does he have to be named Monroe Bennett? *wry smile* *cue reminiscing of a certain other show*) escaped and will be wreaking havoc, I assume.

e) I’d really like if Amanda somehow survived (I mean, it’s TV, anything is survivable on TV, a little chest/shoulder wound should be nothing), because I liked her.

f) I had to google the actor who played Grace’s dad (he was awesome!) because he looked familiar and look, he also played the substitute pressie who needed to be bullied into doing the right thing in TLS.

g) With the EM drive being magnetic (duh), I think Liam’s idea has something to do with trying to use the EM drive to pull the asteroid in off the impact course. I vote for partial success, because otherwise the show’s premise would go out of the window and they might as well just end it.

And I think that’s all I’ve got (for now).

I think I’ll go find some pretties to queue up for next week. Although, I’ve already been in the tags a little and as far as I could see, nobody ships my OT3 (I’m not surprised at all), so I might need to do some giffing myself. And maybe write fic. But after I finish my current fic exchange assignment, which I should be doing instead of writing this, but oh well. Maybe now I’ll be able to concentrate better.

Tagging @street-of-mercy, because you got me into this mess! ;) (You don’t have to respond or anything, but in case you’re interested in my thoughts and questionable shipping choices, here you go. :D)