#and this is of course unfixable
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Top the phenomena on this website: when an OP cannot stop themselves from making the world’s unfunniest quips in the middle of an otherwise interesting reblog exchange
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Omfg batman thinking tim was dead for a bit there at the end of the dlc! Lmao the man is snapping at the seams. insane. I love it
#Shitpost#jim: is he ok?#tim: yeah totally yeah of course :)#LYING THROUGH HIS TEETH LOL.#sorry arkham batman is unfixable tim. U try. U really do#but by god.
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Nightmares • Sebastian
Pairing: Noah Sebastian x Fem!reader (oneshot)
Words: 2.1k
Warnings: Smut 18+ (fem!fingering, male!receiving, explicit language)
Prompt: You wake up from a nightmare, and your friend Noah finds a way to keep it off your mind.
Authors note: I know this prompt was requested a while ago, but I finally got it out hehehHEHEHE
Tags: @sammyjoeee @cookiesupplier @th4t-em0-k1d @dsireland86 @whenthesummerdies @spicywhenspeaking @gretaswhore28 @veronicaphoenix @lma1986 @calleyx13 @somewhere-diamond @talialovesmiw @auratheopossumwitch @blackveilomens @skulliecadaver-blog @silentglassbreak @darkmxgician
(some tags are from older one shots, so if you want on or off the tag list pls let me know! :3)
THIS IS A FANFICTION USING REAL PEOPLE IN A FICTIONAL SITUATION! I AM NOT IMPLYING THESE PEOPLE WOULD DO THE THINGS IN THE STORY OR ACT THE WAY THEY DO IN THE STORY IN REAL LIFE! IT IS FICTION! IT IS JUST FOR FUN! <3
“I don’t want anything to do with you ever again.” He seethed through his tongue, piercing me with his harsh words.
“But-“ you whispered, barely able to make a sound as your stomach clenched with complete heartbreak.
You never should have admitted your feelings for your best friend.
Noah’s glare was grim as he pointed a finger into your chest, disgust radiating off of his tone, “I would never love someone like you.”
His words dug into your soul, breaking you from the inside out as if you were a worthless, disposable vase, shattering into unfixable pieces.
“Y/N,” he yelled, face inches from yours with a snarl evident on his face as he bore hatred into you.
“Y/N!”
“Y/N!”
Your eyes opened as you gasped, your body flying upward as you sat on the couch, chest heaving heavily.
Wet tear-stained cheeks left you gathering your bearings, before making eye contact with a concerned brunette, his auburn orbs furrowed with distress.
You coughed and choked on your saliva, breathing with intensity as you sobbed loudly, pulling the thin fuzzy blanket up to your throat in an attempt to comfort yourself.
With legs draped over Noah’s lap, the two of you were placed on the couch. Looking around the room in confusion as the blue light from the tv danced across the darkened room, you watched it illuminating Noah’s worry. The sound of the movie that you were long-gone from paying attention to, was muffled within your ears as they rang with anxiety, unable to focus on what just happened.
Right, you were watching a movie with him; but must’ve fallen asleep.
It was just a nightmare- but it felt so real.
Noah’s calloused hand reached out to you, his slender fingers delicate as he rested them on your leg, ghosting over the exposed skin from your shorts.
“Y/N,” Noah’s voice cracked with fret, “what happened?”
You sniffed as you wiped your eyes with your sleeve, shaking your head, “n-nothing, I just had a bad dream.”
Sucking in a hyperventilating breath, you sighed and Noah opened his arms, inviting you into his space.
You hesitated for a moment, something that he noticed, before he reached over to grab your shoulders and pulled you into him anyway.
You relaxed slightly once safe in his familiar arms, pressed against his chest. Your face nuzzled into his black sharingan hoodie, his cologne faint as it mixed with the smell of tide from his laundry. The fabric was soft against your s/c skin, and Noah’s fingers began cradling your head, running across your scalp and through your strands in a soothing motion.
His free hand rubbed up your back as you rocked gently, “did you want to talk about it?”
“uh, n-no.” You hiccuped.
Your heart pounded at the thought of telling him what happened in the dream. He couldn’t know it was about him rejecting you, saying he would never love you.
The two of you had only been friends for a couple of years, meeting at a record label party. You were talking to Matt about sound mixing and Noah had overheard; and you’ve been inseparable since.
You never intended to fall in love with him. Of course you’ve always found him handsome, but there wasn’t ever an initial crush. However as you got to know him, his humour and personality sucked you in, leaving you completely whipped; and lost.
It was easier to believe he would never feel the same, because you were just friends. Nothing more, nothing less.
Noah sucked in a breath, “are you sure? I’m pretty worried about you right now, not gonna lie.”
Shrugging, you squeezed onto his body and clung to him. Noah’s small circles on your back delved lower and lower before sliding underneath your crew neck, inviting himself to trail his nails along the bare skin of your back. He traced rhythmic patterns, leaving the skin goose-bumping and tingling.
He always did that when you were anxious.
“One second you were quietly sleeping, the next you were thrashing and crying.” He whispered, resting his cheek on your head. He was genuinely worried, and you knew he cared about you; despite the harsh words that came from the dream.
You exhaled heavily, easing into his touch, “It’s okay, it was just awful… I don’t want to talk about it.”
Noah hummed, agreeing warily. You twisted your body so you were resting your back against his chest and snuggling into his arm that wrapped around you, before turning your attention back to the movie. His hand still rested along the skin beneath the sweater, holding onto your side.
You had no clue what was going on in the movie, but the two main characters on screen were heavily kissing, and beginning to strip. You and Noah watched in silence, ignoring the awkward tension that began to build as you held each other to the sex scene unfolding ahead.
With puffy eyes you wiped your cheeks again and began focusing on breathing, worried he’d notice the way it hitched as the characters loved each other. Your mind raced as it replayed the nightmare over and over again.
Noah’s torso stiffen, his hand on your side hesitating for a moment, before circling the skin again. He ran his hand across your stomach, soothingly.
You pretended to be focused on the movie, and so did Noah, but knew his attention shifted once his fingers tailed further down, the tips treading dangerously close to the hem of your shorts.
He dipped his fingers just between the waistband, running them across your abdomen, the skin tingling at the sensation.
Sucking in a shaky breath as he pushed his hand down further, touching the top of your underwear; you felt your stomach churn in anticipation.
“What are you doing?” You asked nervously, confused at his actions. Noah’s always been touchy with you, whether it was playing with your hair, holding and hugging you, or tickling your skin; but this was something different- something blurring the line between friendship and more.
His chest vibrated as he spoke, a sultry touch added to his tone, “Maybe, if you’re comfortable,” his fingers continued to slide further down, now between your underwear, “you need a little distraction?”
Your heartbeat quickened at his words, a mix of confusion and excitement washing over you. Noah’s fingers lingered for a moment, waiting for an answer.
“What do you mean?” You whispered and felt him smile as his chin rested on the top of your head.
“I can tell you’re overthinking,” He said gently, “so, let me give you something else to focus on?”
The muscles of your thighs clenched at his words as lust washed through you. Of course, you’ve thought about Noah’s inked fingers; there have been many times you imagined your own were his during nights fated to lustful thoughts.
As the room felt smaller and smaller, your mind began to wander to dirty images of succumbing to Noah, the nightmare beginning to wash away.
Nodding slowly you questioned him, “like?”
A breath caught in your throat once his fingers dipped against your sensitive skin, pressing small circles with the pads of his middle and ring fingers.
“This,” his voice hoarse and hungry.
You chewed on the inside of your cheek as Noah’s fingers slid between your folds, the slick arousal coating his fingers as he teased your entrance.
“You’re soaked, and I’ve barely done anything,” he chuckled, and your face flushed from embarrassment. Everything about him turned you on, and now he knew.
You hummed, too nervous to make a sound as his fingers sank into you. With your head tilted back to rest it onto his shoulder, you closed your eyes, afraid to look at Noah who was peering down.
Noah’s free hand ran up underneath your shirt, passing your chest before stopping at the nape of your neck.
“You’re allowed to moan,” He chuckled, his fingers curling.
Laughing lowly, your hips beginning to rut towards his touch, “Well then, I’m going to need you to make me.”
“Is that a challenge?”
Eyes fluttered open to his, a sly smile playing on his lips.
Noah’s dark eyes flickered to his hand that pleasured you, watching how you pushed and pulled from his touch, his mouth agape, almost moaning himself. His repetitive motion left you crumbling, body close to release.
His fingers continuously curled towards your pleasure, his thumb pressed against your clit as he skillfully gave you everything he had. His free hand slid from the base of your neck, grabbing hold of your chest, squeezing.
Noah’s fingers slid up, the pads rubbing along aggressively, stimulating every desire you have ever had. At that moment a moan escaped your throat and he smiled widely, encouraging him to go even faster.
“There you go,” He groaned in contentment and you felt him harden below. Your fingers gripped his thigh, nails digging into his skin as eyelids lowered in rapture, stimulating that you were seconds away from release.
“Oh fuck,” you cried as you came, your other hand gripping Noah’s that held you from above your shirt, squeezing as your abdomen clenched. Legs began closing around his hand as Noah worked out your orgasm, refusing to stop until you pushed him away.
With heavy pants you sat up, turning to face Noah who smiled, taking his fingers into his mouth and licking your release off of them. The tension between you two grew stronger as his hand then slid to the top of his cotton shorts, palming his erection that pushed tauntingly against the fabric.
You watched hungrily, mind no longer thinking about the nightmare from minutes before; but instead wanted to see how far he’d be willing to go- just this once.
“I think I need more of a distraction,” you said delicately, adrenaline taking your racing heart. Without a second thought, you then straddled Noah on the couch, grinding into him as his fingers gripped your hips.
Your body began aching for Noah’s touch again, craving him as his auburn eyes flicked between your own and your lips. You leaned down as his hands travelled up your body, gripping your face as he broke the distance and kissed you desperately. You couldn’t help it as your stomach grew butterflies, his soft lips devouring your own in a hungry kiss, lips open as his tongues pushed against each others.
A guttural groan escaped Noah as he kissed you deeper, the beat of his heart vibrating against his chest in excitement. His hands glided down to follow every curve of your body, pushing and pulling against the skin with need. His hands landed on either side of your hips once again before gripping your ass, pushing you into his arousal, frantic for friction.
“I bet I can make you come without even touching you,” you teased and spoke into his lips, rutting back and forth along his covered length.
Noah chuckled darkly, “I guarantee you could,” his breath quickened, “but I’ve dreamed about your lips wrapped around my cock too many times to let that happen the first time.”
Pausing for a moment, you stared down at him, almost shocked at his words. His smile was radiant as he brought you into another haste kiss, feeling giddy as you two melded into one.
Dream, about you?
“Really?” You whispered, barely audible. You shoved the surprise to the back of your brain, kissing him eagerly one more time before sliding off his lap and onto the floor. Positioning yourself between his legs, you then gripped the hem of his shorts as he watched every move, analyzing each touch.
“I need you Y/N,” he replied as you pulled his shorts down, his arousal breaking free and standing hard against his stomach. You couldn’t help but let out a moan as you gripped him, beginning to stroke up and down.
Noah ardently pushed into your hand and watched with furrowed brows. You then slowly licked a strip up his length before taking him into your mouth fully.
Swirling your tongue along the tip, you then began sliding down, lapping and sucking. Listening to his moans left your knees weak, barely supporting yourself below, succumbing to his need.
Noah’s fingers tangled in your hair as he held it out of your face, admiring you worshiping him. His head fell back in pleasure as you took your free hand to stroke what was free at the base, rubbing his skin firmly but in a delicate manner.
“Jesus fucking Christ Y/N,” his groan deep and lewd, the sensation of your mouth wrapped around him leaving Noah crumbling to the touch.
You wanted to take an orgasm from him, but weren’t sure whether you wanted him coating the back of your throat, or breeding your insides.
“So,” you licked up Noah again before pulling back, stroking him with a hand as you spoke, “do you want to come in my mouth…”
You trailed off, before looking up at him devilishly through your lashes, “or inside of me?”
Noah’s slanted-slutty grin and lidded eyes told you everything, but his words reassured you completely, erasing any signs of doubt you had from the nightmare.
“I’ve always wanted to make every inch of you mine.”
#bad omens#noah sebastian#bad omens cult#bad omens band#noah sebastian davis#metalcore#Noah Sebastian smut#bad omens smut#smut#nightmare#bad omens fic#smut oneshot#best friends smut
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Barbatos: Oh, my dear empress. I am really pleased that you are making every effort to fulfill your responsibilities. However, I implore you to take a break every now and then.
MC: *smudges of ink on her face*
MC: ...
MC: One last document and I'm done—
Barbatos: Certainly not.
MC: ...
Barbatos: ...
MC: *slowly picks up her pen, while staring at him*
Barbatos: Empress.
Lucifer: Don't you have work to do?
Diavolo: We're on a date right now, Lucifer.
Lucifer: I'm asking you because I'm worried about your empress.
Diavolo: She will call if ever there's an inconvenience—
*receives a call from MC*
Diavolo: *answers it* Hello, my empress?
MC: I've locked myself in the storage room while I was searching for old documents.
Diavolo: Oh dear— Are you alright?
MC: Yes. I am unharmed. I've only called just to ask if I could destroy the door.
Diavolo: ...
Lucifer: ...
Diavolo and Lucifer: *both trying to hold their laughter*
Diavolo: Of course, empress. You can do everything to get yourself out of there.
MC: Thank you. *hangs up*
Diavolo and Lucifer: ...
Diavolo and Lucifer: *laughs*
Lucifer: She's quite independent, isn't she?
Diavolo: I could already imagine Barbatos rubbing his temples.
Barbatos: Empress...
MC: *was trying to fix the door*
MC: I've got this. If you would just give me some time—
Barbatos: *has his arms crossed* *looking sternly at her*
MC: ...
MC: I'll take that as a yes.
Barbatos: Empress!
Diavolo: I'm surprised to see her sleeping at this hour.
Barbatos: I've had to force her to sleep. She wouldn't leave the door unfixed.
Diavolo: *troubled chuckle*
Barbatos: My lord, you have to remind the empress that she has a butler to rely on.
Diavolo: *smiles awkwardly* Couldn't you remind her yourself?
Barbatos: *frowns*
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Shadows and Surprises (3)
Part 3 of Azriel x Reader fanfic! Enjoyyyy!
Summary: Azriel meets y/n at Rita's and spends a single night of passion with you before heading your separate ways. Only, the Mother had different ideas.
Warnings: vague mentions of family difficulties.
Tag list - @mirandasidefics @lilah-asteria @nyxbranwenn @nickishadow139 @dee-writes-smut @impossibelle @mybestfriendmademe
Y/N POV
You groaned as you dragged yourself from the bed, the knocking at your door more insistent now. You pulled the door open and gaped, seeing Azriel standing there behind it.
"Hi" he said, his voice uncharacteristically quiet and nervous.
"Hi" you replied, holding the door a little wider open, a silent offering for him to come into your apartment. He accepted, his wings tucked in tightly to avoid knocking into you or the doorframe as he walked into your living room. The room was a mess - you never had the time or energy to clean it these days. When you weren't working at the bookstore, you were sleeping away your nausea and indigestion. You knew growing a baby would be exhausting, but this surpassed all of your expectations.
"To what do I owe the pleasure?" you joked, leaning against the sofa edge to support yourself. You hadn't expected Azriel to show up at your apartment. In fact, you hadn't expected to see him again. It wasn't that you thought he was a bad male and would deliberately want to shirk his responsibilities - but he was responsible for the safety of an entire Court, and a baby likely wasn't in his plans.
"We need to talk", was all he replied. You stared at him silently, encouraging him to go on.
"I don't know what I am doing. It's not that I never wanted children, I do, I just didn't expect to have any at this time in my life. But I want to be there. I want to be involved. I know what it feels like to have a broken family and feel like a burden, like you're unloveable, and I don't want my child to ever question if I love them". He had tears in his eyes, and you realised there was probably a lot of unspoken, unshared pain behind them that you might never know. But it was enough. You had your own pain that you hadn't shared with him, and you couldn't expect disclosure from him if you weren't willing to return the gesture. Not yet.
You reached out to touch his arm in comfort and, much to your surprise, Azriel caught your arm before you could reach him and pulled you into his chest. You nuzzled in and he rested his head on top of yours, a deep sigh sounding in the otherwise silent room.
"We will need to plan logistics", he said into your hair, ever the pragmatist.
"Yes Mr Spymaster, we can plan logistics", you chuckle back.
"I'm serious", he says, pulling away to look at you. He scans your body from head to toe, and you realise he is surveying you. Taking an inventory. "I can see how tired you are, are you not sleeping? You know it's not good for the baby if you're not resting, right?".
You laugh, your heart warm at the fact that Azriel was suddenly so concerned for yours and the baby's welfare.
"Az, it's hard to sleep when you single-handedly run a business and a home", you gesture around yourself at the piles of dirty dishes, laundry, the thick layer of dust on the broken fireplace. Azriel's eyes followed yours, and you suddenly felt ashamed. Your apartment was far from perfect. Your landlord was quite the absentee, so your broken fire place had gone unfixed for several winters now. As had the poorly insulated windows, the kitchen sink tap which sometimes decided to spray you down when you turned it on, and the mould forming around the edges of the bathroom floor. Whilst your bookstore was successful, life in Velaris was still expensive, and you couldn't really afford much better.
"Then you move in with me", he said. You simply gaped.
"In your own room, of course", he added quickly. "You will have your own room and your own space".
"Az, I couldn't ask you to do that" you replied, pulling out of his embrace.
"You're not asking. I am insisting. I don't fancy showing up here one day and finding you rabid from a rat bite", you notice him glance over to a hole in the skirting board of your kitchen.
"It's not a rat, it's a mouse, her name is Daisy and she would never bite me", you retort. Admittedly, you didn't like sharing your living space with Daisy, even if you were somewhat confident that she wouldn't bite you. Somewhat.
Azriel only chuckled. "I insist", I will ask Rhys and Cassian to come and help move your belongings over to the House of Wind".
Rhys, Cassian, House of Wind. You were moving into the centre of the Night Court. Azriel felt your shiver.
"Don't worry, only Cassian and I live there. He will dote over you more than I will - he will carry you everywhere if you ask".
Cassian. Lord of Bloodshed. Commander of the Night Court armies.
Azriel could see the uncertainty in your face and pulled you back to his chest. "Relax, they are just normal people, I promise they will love you. Mor will be so happy to finally have another female in her presence she probably won't leave you alone."
"Mor?" you asked.
"Rhys' cousin and third in command" he replied. You could sense from his tense stance that there was some history there, but decided now wasn't the time to broach it.
"Ok", you sighed, "when do we make this happen?".
Azriel smiled. "Now".
Azriel's POV
After reaching out to Rhys, Azriel took y/n's hand and let her lead him to her bedroom to start packing. It was only about 10 minutes later that another knock sounded at the door, and Azriel opened it to see Rhysand and Cassian beaming behind. They both walked into the apartment.
"A new chapter, brother" Cassian said, pulling Azriel into a hug. Rhysand smiled as he watched them, giving Azriel a hearty pat on the shoulder. They both turned to the door of y/n's bedroom as they watched her appear, shyly holding a box of her belongings. Cassian was the first to approach her, giving her a huge smile and taking the box from her hands. Azriel noticed that Cassian's smile only grew wider when he looked down to y/n's stomach and saw the small swelling.
"Welcome to the family, y/n" he said, putting the box on the floor and offering his arms out to her. She stepped forward slowly into them, but seemed to warm into his embrace. He could almost feel her relief. Rhysand stepped forward, careful not to appear intimidating. Whilst Rhys had the kindest soul Azriel had known, his power was palpable, and capable of intimidating just about anyone. He saw y/n peer past Cassian at Rhys, who simply offered his hand to her. She accepted as Rhys brought her hand to his mouth and kissed the top of her fist.
"It is an honour to meet you, y/n", he said. Y/n blushed so deeply he had to withhold a laugh. Y/n mumbled something quite incoherent in response, which earned her a chuckle from Rhys.
"Let's get moving, shall we?", Cassian called out, holding onto the first of y/n's boxes and flying off towards the House of Wind.
-
It took a few hours, but eventually all of y/n's belongings had been moved into her new bedroom. Azriel watched as y/n took in the room. He had picked a room a few doors down from his, to give y/n her privacy, but to be close enough in case she needed anything. Cassian's room was a few doors the other way, so she was sandwiched between the pair of them. Azriel hoped that that way, if anything happened, one of them would be there to help.
"You are welcome to change the room however you wish", Rhys said, appearing in the doorframe. "Paint it, change the furniture, whatever you want - this is your room and you can do with it as you like".
"Thank you", y/n replied, breathless in wonder. The bedroom was almost the size of her entire apartment had been, and Az could see that she was starting to feel overwhelmed. He silently gestured for his brother to leave them and walked to y/n's side.
"Are you ok?", he asked.
"Yes", y/n replied, "just a bit shocked at how this day has turned out. It's certainly not what I expected. Who knew how much could change over an indigestion tonic". She laughed, but it sounded more hollow than normal.
"I'm sorry", Azriel said, his hand rubbing circles on y/n's back.
"What for?".
"I don't know. I just felt like a sorry was warranted right now".
"You're daft".
Azriel shook his head, hiding a smile that had crept onto his face. No wonder he had been enamoured with you that night. You were one of the few people who wasn't intimidated by him. Who spoke your mind to him. He appreciated it more than he would tell you.
"Mor and Amren are joining us for a family dinner tonight, but you don't need to come if you are feeling tired or not up for it. They will all understand and we can have your food brought up here".
Y/n looked up at him and gave him a small, watery smile.
"I think I would like that", she replied. Azriel couldn't hid his smile in response.
"Great, dinner is at 7, I'll leave you to have a rest now and come and get you to take you down to the dining room just before". With that, he departed, closing the bedroom door behind him.
Y/N's POV
I think I would like that.
WHAT.
You didn’t know what had come over you. Of course you wanted to meet Azriel’s family, eventually. But most females are wined and dined before being introduced to a male’s family. Then again, most females are wined and dined before having a male’s baby, so if anything, you were at least consistent.
Your new home was nothing short of show-stoppingly beautiful. Your bedroom, which was fit for a queen, followed a pearlescent theme, with light marble furniture. The walls, which were a shade of muted light gold, rivalled any room you had lived in before. Rhys’ offer to re-design the room was kind, but you’d be crazy to want to change a single thing. The bed, clearly designed for Illyrian wings, would fit 5 of you with space, and had the softest duvet you could imagine. It felt like stroking a cloud. You felt a momentary panic that you had, in fact, fallen asleep when you had intended to nap - and dreamt this entire encounter. You pinched yourself hard and yelped. No, this was very real. You hopped into the bed, and sleep took you immediately.
-
A soft knock at your door had you leaning up on your shoulders. You took a moment to remember your surroundings.
“Come in”, you called.
Azriel walked into the room and you had to force your jaw not to drop open. Clad in his Illyrian leathers, he looked devastating.
“It’s almost time for dinner, are you sure you’d like to join?”, he asked, taking in your bed hair.
“Yes, yes, sorry just a minute!”, you jumped from the bed and ran in front of the vanity mirror, smoothing down the knots that had formed from your tossing and turning. Azriel chuckled and walked over to you, reaching out to untangle a knot that had formed by the back of your neck. You froze as his hands brushed against you, gently pulling the hair free. When you looked presentable, you turned to face him and took a deep breath.
“You ready?”, he asked.
“Ready”.
#a court of frost and starlight#a court of mist and fury#a court of silver flames#a court of thorns and roses#a court of wings and ruin#acotar#acotar fanfiction#acotar x reader#acotar x y/n#azriel x reader
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It's no wonder Out happened when you really think about it. Nastya doesn't like organic life because it's complicated, it can break, sometimes it's even unfixable.
quote from gender rebels
Nastya is in love with Aurora, and in saying that she is saying "you are not organic life, I can deal with you because you are metal and algorithm and predictable" - we can see this in bedtime story when she says she'll tweak Aurora's story creation algorithm
screenshot from A Bedtime Story
Aurora is not inorganic. She is not ai. She is a space moon made of flesh and blood and teeth and bone. She is not an ai. She is a body that was taken and stripped of autonomy, of the right to self identify, of the right to think- to be imperfect and organic.
The metal is a veneer that hides how messy and traumatized and unfixable she is. From the outside she is a starship. From the inside she can still bleed.
And this makes them fundamentally incompatible. But yet, they are in love.
And really, it's no wonder Nastya fell in love with Aurora. Let's take a look at Nastya's home planet, or at least home society:
"Terminals were scattered across the planet. There was one on every street corner, one beneath every lamppost and one in every commune block."
"The midwife-machine performs a series of programmed manœuvres to quieten [the baby]. It cradles it and hums at several pitches until it finds one that seems most soothing. Mechanical arms stroke the baby’s flesh even as others start the process of implanting augmented reality interfaces into its nervous system."
"The Czar an atrophied frame, never present in the real world and worn to dust by the chemical compounds that kept his brain alive so it could live forever in a perfect virtual paradise. The Rabotnik a copy, a mind preserved unchanging in the instant before its death and placed in an everlasting metal frame."
(Cyberian Demons)
Its safe to say the world Nastya was born into, from the very minute she was born, was ridden with technology. She has augmented reality interfaces inplanted into her from birth. It would stand to reason that being taken from this society, wherein technology is everywhere, inside and out, would stand for a bit of a shock.
Aurora too had been augmented by the Cyberia.
While it is stated that the last time Nastya had used the ports themselves was directly before her death — "The last time she had used the ports, her tutor had ripped them out of her as the rebels stormed the palace" — Aurora is laced with Cyberian technology. I'd imagine she has something of a 'bluetooth wireless connection' with Aurora, rather than the physical data transfer of files between the ports and Nastya, it may as well be similar enough.
Imagine being Nastya, going from Cyberia, wherein there is augmented reality contantly, transplanted onto a ship with metal blood, a jonny, and a vampire. To Aurora, where the only bits of augmented reality run through Aurora.
Of course she'd fall in love with her. Aurora is familiarity. Aurora isn't organic. Aurora isn't human.
And of course when the undeniable part of aurora that is organic, that is a flesh moon plated in metal with her brain hooked to machines, when so much has broken and been replaced, when, presumably, aurora is less of an algorithm, nastya leaves with the brand cyberia left on her.
Because Aurora healing, becoming more of herself and less of a starship, is messy, and organic, and human.
and hard for nastya.
‘Think how long she’s been flying you around. Think how many bullet holes you’ve punched through her and how many atmospheres you’ve dropped her through. Think how many alterations and improvements we’ve made, Tim to her guns and Ashes to her storage and Brian to her engines and the Toy Soldier to who knows what. How much do you think is left of her after all she’s brought you through?’ Nastya held up the ancient, battered piece of hull plating. Just visible under the grime and scars of particles of space junk was a fragment of the Aurora’s original logo and serial number. Jonny honestly couldn’t remember the last time he had seen a version that hadn’t been painted by the Mechanisms themselves.
‘So she’s free, now.’ Nastya gestured around at the spaceship they were standing in. ‘This Aurora can take you where you want to go. I’m going to take my Aurora somewhere else.’
Aurora was ship of theseus'd. Aurora was improved. Aurora was no longer cyberian. (both literally, and metaphorically)
So nastya left.
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Something Just Like This II
pairing - charles leclerc x reader
fandom - f1
summary - a look into your relationship
part - ii (part II) (part III )
a/n - more angst??
"everyone, I want you to meet charlotte”
never before had a single sentence made your head whirl the way it was. never before had you felt nauseous at the sight of your best friend, but that day, the wine you had drunk threatened to make an unpleasant comeback. never before had you felt your heart shatter at the sight of a person before, but you swore you heard your fragile heart shatter into a milllion unfixable pieces, as you stared at the gorgeous brunette with the sweet smile, currently greeting charles’ family.
it wasn’t just you that stood shell shocked. pascale stared openly at her son, confusion and sadness visible in her eyes, but nevertheless, the matriarch of the leclerc family greeted the young girl with a smile, kissing her on the cheek and welcoming her to the home that suddenly felt so cold to you. lorenzo stood up to, ever the kind hearted one, greeting her and offering a glass of wine to her.
arthur was the only one that sat shell shocked, mouth agape, and it wasn’t till lorenzo nudged hum gently that he stood up to greet the woman.
the smile on charles’ face made your already hurting heart ache a little more. he looked so happy, and you hated it. you felt the easy tears rising again, threatening to spill over, but you forced them back. no. you were not going to have a breakdown in front of charles and his family, and his new girlfriend. girlfriend. the word had never seemed so painful before.
but you put on your camera smile, flashing charlotte a warm smile, and giving her a small hug. “Hello, I’m y/n” you smiled softly at her, admitting to yourself that she really was a beauty. "hello, I’m charlotte, I’m a big fan!” she exclaimed, and you forced yourself to keep the smile on your face. “always a pleasure to meet the fans” you joked half heartedly, and she laughed. much to your relief, pascale, sensing your discomfort, pulled the girl into a conversation on the other side, leaving you, arthur, lorenzo and charles in her drawing room.
"so charlotte sine huh?” arthur asked, face blank of any emotion. he recognised the girl well, having grown up quite near the family. “yes, I met her the other day on my run and figured I might as well ask her out on a date” he smiled, grinning it himself at the memory. “she seems nice, n’est ce pas?” lorenzo asked, throwing you a sympathetic smile. “oui, elle est tres gentile” he affirmed, and you fought back the urge to cry once more. “mais, y/n, you didn’t tell me you would be here?” he said, pulling you in for a hug,
y/n. not cherie. that was your first thought. of course you wouldn’t be cherie anymore. no, you’d have to give up that title, you reasoned, inhaling a shaky breath.
"i wasn’t supposed to. but i met maman in the afternoon and she invited me over for dinner, and i missed you guys so i thought i might as well” you said, quite honestly. “lovely, that way I can introduce you to charlotte too, no?” he smiled, and you faked a smile once more, before politely excusing yourself.
taking deep shaky breaths, you slipped into the balcony, glass of wine still in hand, sipping on it slowly to keep you grounded, you recognised the sound of feet softly making their way to you, and before you knew it, arthur’s blue shirt came into your line of sight.
how are you holding up?” he asked, wrapping his warm around.
you let out a shaky breath, taking another sip of your wine, and throwing him a watery smile. “simply splendid, tur” you whispered, and arthur swore he felt his heart break for his older sister.
"il ne sait pas ce qu’il ressent cherie, donne lui de temps, je sais qu’il t’aime” he doesn’t know how he feels darling, give him some time, I know he loves you he said, and you let the first tear drop, feeling it roll slowly down your cheek and drip onto the railing.
“no don’t cry” arthur mumbled, feeling such sadness on your behalf. with a soft sigh, he pulled you in for a proper hug, letting you bury your face in his shirt, and balancing your wine glass on the balcony railing.
how had it come to this? this wasn’t how you expected your night to go. you had hoped at the end of it you and charles would have been the ones cuddled up on the couch, laughing and chatting with his mother.
but unfortunately, fate had different plans.
dinner was an oddly quiet affair. pascale’s delicious dinner received multiple compliments from the five of you, but there was an odd tenseness in the air. and you knew it was because of your presence, that the atmosphere was so tense.
"merci maman, pour le diner, mais, je pense qui je vais rentrer chez moi, maintenant, je suits tres fatigue” thank you mum for the dinner, but I think i will head home now, I’m very tired you said, giving the woman who had been a second mother to you all your life a tight hug. you saw your own sad smile reflected on her face, and she gave you a bowl of chocolate mousse to take home.
"leaving already?” lorenzo asked, pulling you in for a hug as well.
“oui, je suis tres fatigue, enzo” you whispered, and he dropped a kiss to the top of your head. “d'accord, bonne nuit ange” he said, and you smiled at him. arthur insisted on walking you all the way to your car, and you let him, grateful for his company.
“is he gonna be with her forever?” you asked, the childish question slipping past your lips, voicing the fears you had in your heart. you knew it was silly to ask. but you had to ask, you just had to.
"no, don't be silly ange. of course he won't. i know he's my brother and i do love him unconditionally but he is terrible at maintaining relationships. in fact he is utterly hopeless. you know why? because he isn't with the woman he truly loves" arthur stated, helping you into your car.
you just sighed, leaning up to kiss his cheek and then starting the engine. the roar of your ferrari brought a small smile to your face, and waving him goodbye, you drove out.
yes, you were distraught but no, you were not going going to let it wreck you. but even as you forced yourself to be strong, you could feel your heart cracking into a million pieces in your chest. you had felt heartbreak before but never had you felt so absolutely wrecked over someone. not just someone.
your best friend. your bestest friend in the whole wide world.
and you had never told him you loved him.
the thought brought bile rising to your throat, and you had to pull over to throw up.
finally, you stopped resisting the tears, and let yourself break down completely in the car, parked near the dock in monaco. you sobbed and sobbed and wailed, lashing out at the wheel of your ferrari, releasing all your pent up hurt.
you turned the radio up, trying to muffle out the sound of your tears. the last thing you expected was the knock on your window, that had you reaching for the pepper spray and slowly lowering the window.
"hey, you doing okay y/n? i saw your car and i heard what sounded like crying so i thought.." your eyes met lewis' sweet ones, currently displaying concern for you.
lewis hamilton leaned down, taking in your red eyes and nose.
he knew you quite well, he had seen you with charles and lorenzo and andrea very frequently around the paddock, and had even spent time with you in monaco when charles invited him for dinner.
he'd never admit it, but he had always thought you were beautiful. but a few stories from pierre suggested to him that you and charles were a thing so he never said anything to you.
but here you were, tears streaming down your face, blasting someone like you by adele on the radio and he knew something was wrong.
"oh! hey lewis. didn't think anyone would be here, i just wanted a minute" you smiled.
"i can leave if you want, just wanted to make sure everything was okay" he said, and you were touched by the sincerity in his eyes.
"im okay" you spoke softly, not trusting your voice to go above a whisper. "but i could do with some company" you admitted, chuckling.
"anytime" he smiled back at you. you opened to door to your car, letting him slide in the passenger seat.
"out on a jog were you?" you asked, driving down to your favourite icecream store (vegan of course)
"yep, i had a lot on my mind and i just wanted to run it all off y'know" he said, and you noticed the shift in his eyes and the sadness reflecting in them.
"this season's getting to you isn't it?" you whispered, and felt your heart go out to him when he nodded.
"lewis, one season doesn't define you...and you've been performing marvellously considering the car you have. im not exactly an f1 whiz but you're still the best. without a doubt" you said honestly.
lewis chuckled, and then turned to face you directly. "don't let charles hear you say that" he joked, and immediately he noticed the shift in your demeanour.
"uh yeah i won't" you mumbled, with a tight smile. "is everything okay with you two?" lewis asked, concerned.
you sighed, stopping at the store and looking determinedly out the window, trying your hardest not to cry.
"yeah it's all okay. im just a little overwhelmed right now is all" you sighed.
lewis nodded, not pushing you to tell him anything you didn't want to.
"c'mon, let's go and get some ice cream" he smiled at you, getting up to open your door.
your story
caption : late night snack 💗@lewishamilton
replies -:
@.yourbestfriend - girlie pop is that lewis hamilton you've tagged?!?!
@.arthurleclerc - icecream without me? :(
@lorenzotl- icecream with lewis?
@lewishamilton - had so much fun! definitely trying the biscoff one next time💜
@.charlesleclerc - is that our icecream spot y/n?
*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
sighing, you let your hand crash against the piano, wincing at the discordant notes.
this stupid melody had been playing around in your head for weeks and you couldn't put it into a proper song.
at the same time you had also decided the best thing you could do was put space between you and charles, and so, your communication had decreased significantly.
arthur still spoke to you regularly and visited you almost every week. he often brought carla along, who you adored, and who thought of you as an older sister.
he kept you updated on how everyone was doing, and you spoke to lorenzo and pascale over text when you could.
but of course it was hard to avoid your best friend when your social media feed was full of posts about him, now more often with his girlfriend, and you were having a hard time ignoring it.
letting your head drop back, you stretched, hearing your back crack like bubble wrap. the ding of the text notification from your phone made you sit up, smiling when you saw lewis' contact pop up on the screen
lewis h 💜: hey, just wanted to check in on you and make sure you're doing okay?
you : hello, I'm doing okay, thank you for asking 🫶🏼
lewis h 💜: what have you been upto?
you : just trying to figure out this melody, it's driving me insane
lewis h 💜: don't dress about it. i've heard your music and it's absolutely phenomenal. just relax, breathe, and let the music flow.
you : thank you. i can't thank you enough
lewis h 💜: anytime darling 💗 hope to see you soon?
you : ill be there at the monaco grand prix!
lewis h 💜: ive been meaning to ask, would you like to come as my guest to the mercedes hospitality?
you : id love to but..i don't want to cause a media storm..
lewis h 💜: fuck the media honestly. if i want to bring a friend to the paddock, ill bring a friend to the paddock.
you: lewis hamilton swears? 😯
lewis h 💜: hahaha. so ill see you there?
you : yes. ill be there 💗
lewis h 💜: looking forward to it y/n 💗
smiling, you put your phone down, almost giddy with excitement.
like magic, the melody seemed to fall into place and you called your friend jack.
"hey jack, I've got this idea, but ill need some help" you said.
jack antonoff laughed and said, "on it. another pop hit in the making?" he smirked and you laughed. "i sure hope so. ill see you soon then"
you smiled to yourself.
maybe life wasn't so bad after all.
*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
@kymillman- @yourinstagram arriving at the monaco grand prix, but not in her usual manner with @.charlesleclerc, but rather with @lewishamilton, with a mercedes cap. she also made her way past the ferrari hospitality and went to the mercedes hospitality, but always a pleasure to photograph her.
@predestinato - oh dear what did charles do :( she's always supporting charles at all the races and she's been at every monaco grand prix since he got into f1. i miss her :(
@charles16monaco - she's with lewis now? i was hoping to see her at monaco with the leclercs.
@ynfan23 - mother is serving as always!! but i do wonder where charles is...
@ynlnisaqueen - serving looks and badassery.
@charlesbanana - charlie noo :( but yn looks gorgeous as always but i don't want to lose her to mercedes 😭
@lh44fanbase - sir lewis?? shooting his shot?? with our resident popstar queen?
pushing your sunglasses up your nose, you took in the sight of the monaco paddock, smiling as the sun warmed your skin.
the buzz and chatter and roar of engines felt like home, and you felt so excited to be back.
you spotted lewis, walking with roscoe to the media pen, and you watched as he turned towards you and shot you a bright smile.
you didn't expect him to turn and sprint towards you, and wrap you in a hug. you heard the click of cameras behind you but you didn't care. you were glad to have a friend in the paddock.
it felt a little strange to not walk into the red, bustling ferrari hospitality, and instead into the calm atmosphere of the mercedes one. it felt strange to walk past the sea of red, and you did feel a tinge of guilt.
lewis noticed. and he nudged you, bending to whisper, "it's okay, we're just here as friends. and it's just one race. let's just chill okay. ill treat you to more icecream too" he smiled and you giggled, walking into the hospitality.
across the paddock, charles frowned. he hadn't known you would be at the paddock. you were always at the monaco paddock with him, ever since his first grand prix.
he was used to seeing you wearing some element of red, a cap or a shirt or pants. but you were wearing a mercedes cap, and you hadn't even bothered to tell him you would be at the gp.
he pursed his lips, and decided to make his way to the car. he just needed to be focused on the quali and not on how you were with lewis-
no. he shook his head vigorously. he did not need that image in his head.
from the corner of his eye, he saw carlos approaching, and he sighed. he knew what he'd ask.
"cabron, where is y/n? why is she at mercedes? what did you do?" he asked.
"i did not do anything and i don't know why she's there" he said, sounding more put off than he meant to.
"are you sure? she always supports ferrari.." he trailed off, noticing how sad charles looked.
"what do you think happened?" carlos asked, leaning against the wall. the spaniard hadn't know you for very long, but in the time that he had, he had become one of your closest confidantes. he knew he would have trusted you with anything.
"i don't know, but she has been distant lately ever since..." he trailed off, unsure of the conclusion he had come to.
"ever since what?" carlos asked, growing impatient.
"ever since i introduced charlotte to her and my family.." he trailed off, eyes clouding over.
"ah. i see" carlos said. he didn't have to say anything else. he knew that charles knew, what exactly he wanted to say.
"mate, i know that you and charlotte broke up, and I know that it's because of a very strong reason. don't mess up mate. she's something special and you know it." carlos told his friend.
charles sighed, eyes dropping to the floor.
"best of luck for quali mate" carlos said, clapping him on the back and leaving to get ready for his own quali.
unfortunately for them, quali was shit for ferrari. engine issues meant that charles was p10 and carlos as p12, and much more irksome was the fact that lewis qualified p1, and the cameras had planned to your grinning and clapping.
he stormed off to the drivers room, slamming his helmet on the ground and sinking down onto the bed, roughly grabbing his own hair.
"tu es tellement stupide charles, tellement stupide et maintenant tu perds l'amour de ta vie"
sighing, he reached for his phone, and opened up instagram. he instantly wished he hadn't.
the first post he saw made his heart shatter into a thousand pieces.
@yourinstagram - delighted to announce my new single 'it's nice to have a friend' is out now on!! to all my friends who've been there for me, new and old, i love you to saturn and back. thank you for being my people and for loving me and guiding me through everything. i love u all 🫶🏼💗
tagged - @yourbestfriend @lewishamilton @carla.brocker @lilymunihe @kika.gomes
@ynfans77 - OMG WHAT A MEW SJMGLE I AM LISINF MT MIND
-@ynisabadassqueen - same girlie sameee!! 😭 miss maam really just dropped a banger out of nowhere.
@ynrules - OH MY GOD ITS SO GOOD YAS KWEEN SLAY!!
@kika.gomes - forever proud of u my love 🫶🏼so glad to have seen you make this song and see u power through life. honoured to be your friend and ill love u forever. always wanna hang out with u.
@lewishamilton - honoured to be on your team. my support is with you always. so proud 💜
@yourbestfriend - my favouritest friend. my babygirl. my love. my sweetheart. my talented darling. forever proud of you. forever glad i gave u my glove. 🩷
@lilymunihe- my darling u are a force and i adore u. you're my favourite person ever. so proud and i'm always there for u. ps alex has been sobbing for half an hour I think u broke him
-@alexalbon- no I am not lily 😭😭 but gorgeous job y/n. many congratulations 🎉
@carla.brocker - congratulations mom soeur. i love u always 🩷💗🫶🏼 so glad to have u in my life and have u guiding me. you're an icon and a force to be reckoned with. forever grateful for u.
@arthur.leclerc - you are truly a wonder. congratulations cherie! 🩷
@yncharles2216 - she didn't tag charles :( all those years of friendship...
@charlesfans - she's two faced. forgot charles already.
-@ynfans - we don't need u here. mother slays and you're a loser.
liked by @arthur.leclerc @.kika.gomes @.yourbestfriend and @carla.brocker
*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
charles took in the sight of the blue waters surrounding the boat.
his brothers, their girlfriends, his mother and their friends had all decided to spend the day on the boat. lorenzo and arthur were enjoying the football game on the tv, and carla and charlotte (lorenzo's girlfriend) were enjoying a sunbathing session on the deck.
charles sighed. he missed your presence on the boat. in fact, he missed your presence overall. usually, the both of you would be chatting away to glory, or playing games or just lounging about together.
he hadn't realized exactly how much your presence meant to him until you had slowly begun to pull away.
he felt tears rise up and he blinked them away furiously.
from the corner of his eye, he saw his mother approach him.
"salut maman" he smiled, kissing her cheeks.
"charles, pourquoi as-tu l'air si triste?" charles why do you look so sad?
"je ne sais pas maman, je... elle me manque tellement" i don't know mum, i... i miss her so much.
"mon fils, tu sais, je sais, nous savons tous que tu aimes y/n. pourquoi tu ne lui dis pas chérie ? elle t'aime tellement aussi et ça me fait mal au cœur que deux personnes destinées l'une à l'autre ne soient pas ensemble." my son, you know, i know,we all have known that you love y/n. why dont you tell her darling? she loves you so much too and it hurts my heart that two people destined for each other aren't together.
"mais... et si elle ne m'aime pas, maman ? je ne veux pas ruiner notre amitié et je ne veux pas la perdre. et c'est égoïste, mais je ne veux pas être blessé" but.. what if she doesnt love me back mum? i domt wamt to ruin our friendship and i dont want to lose her. and its selfish, but i dont want to be hurt..
"charles, l'amour est une douleur. dire à quelqu'un dont vous ne savez pas qu'il vous aime, que vous l'aimez est terrifiant, mais c'est ça l'amour. mais tu ne peux pas laisser cette peur t’arrêter. ne manquez pas votre chance de trouver le véritable amour. souviens-toi de mon fils, un amour comme celui-ci n'arrive qu'une fois dans la vie" charles, love is pain. telling someone you don't know loves you, that you love them is terrifying, but thats what love is. but you cant let that fear stop you. dont miss your chance at true love. remember my son, a love like this comes only once in a lifetime.
"je le ferai maman. merci" i will mum. thank you.
pascale pressed a kiss to her middle son's forehead, and left him to his thoughts. she knew he had a lot to think about.
charles knew he had a lot to think about too. he knew he had to tell you that he loved you, because damn it, you were his sun moon and stars and he would be damned if he let you go.
he smiled, a plan forming in his mind. he called carla and arthur, knowing you had a soft spot for the two of them.
"les gars, j'ai besoin de votre aide" he said.
"how can we help charles?" carla asked, smiling at him.
"i want to tell y/n that i love her"
*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
a/n - part ii finished!!! i hope you guys liked it 🩷🫶🏼 comments, feedback, opinions, reblogs are always appreciated! my comments and inbox and are always open so feel free to drop in any time!!
part iii should be up soon too!!
TAGS
those who responded to part i - @chanshintien @eternalharry @janeholt3 @magicalcowboyarbiter @oneafterdark @leclerc13
f1 tags - @theonly1outof-a-billion
all writing - @roslastyles420 @hopefulinlove @bluesongbird
TO BE ADDED TO THE TAGLIST SEND ME AN ASK OR A DM 🩷
#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc x you#cl#cl16#f1#f1 imagines#f1 fanfiction#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#f1 drivers x reader#f1 imagine#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc imagines#charles leclerc x yn#formula 1#lewis hamilton#lewis hamilton x reader#lewis hamilton imagines#lewis hamilton imagine#lewis hamilton fanfiction#social media au#charles leclerc social media au#lewis hamilton social media au
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In the Doghouse - By Jusang (8/10)
The perfect prince wants to be punished! Our protagonist is a practical, poor noblewoman from a family of idiots. Her mother is a has-been. Her father is a dunce. Her brother gambles. Her older sister had a baby out of wedlock. She's doomed. Ready to live life as a barmaid, but then the Prince proposes. He's a huge fan of her (cruelty).
Courtney Devon comes from the bad side of a good family. Her fat and vain mother used to be the belle of the ball...and she just won't let it go...
It's embarrassing. You feel embarrassed for her. Her mother keeps buying frivolous and fashionable magic items...when they don't even have enough cash for a butler....
Courtney Devon screams at her pathetic mother, and the other party guests. She openly admits she has no cash, on purpose. Her parents are delusional. They just keep spending. Her vicious attack is one last desperate plea.
Stop fleecing my family.
We have no wool left.
Oh yes. She despises her noble peers for leading on her idiot family, and laughing at their ruin. She just can't ask nicely.
She has to rage.
She is always alone. The story does a great job of portraying her loneliness. Courtney Devon lashes out. She's rude. She feels no loyalty to her family, but sadly her rage is justified....but that doesn’t mean people will like it. The other nobles avoid her like the plague and despite her beauty no one has proposed.
It's lonely.
It's sad.
She wants to run, but she stays.
Why?
It's all for Eddy. Her sweet nephew. The child did nothing wrong. Courtney Devon knows that if she leaves no one will be able to scare the loan sharks away. Poor Eddy will lose his ancestral title, and he'll be left with an unreliable family...all alone.
She just can't do that to a child.
She lived through it, so she decides to force her family to sell their crumbling estate...
They are against it. Of course they are. Mommy dearest can't possibly live in the countryside!!! She has to go to her parties!!! Brother dearest can't live like a hick!! How will he continue to gamble his life away??? Sister dearest can't leave the big city!!! She's s-s-scared of poor people (even though she is one)!!!
Yes, they are the most annoying people in the world.
Brother dearest brings home more debt.
Too much.
Selling the estate won't cover it anymore.
Suddenly, the Prince proposes.
What a coincidence.
He does it the day after her finances are truly f***ed and unfixable.
The perfect Prince, Richard, is in love with her cruelty. He wants her to yell and scream at him. To shame him for speaking. To kick him aside and call him a fool.
Yes, he's a masochistic freak.
A pretty big one, who needs to keep his freak flag on the down low.
He does actually care about his kingdom after all. Courtney Devon is perfect. She can satisfy his disgusting needs, and she has to keep quiet...or poor dear Eddy won't have two coins to rub together when he grows up.
It's a twisted situation.
Courtney Devon gives him what he wants. What he planned to get from her, no matter what. He's been fawning over her rage like a simpering fan boy, and it enrages her.
Her painful, shameful existence turned on someone’s fetish.
It really is enraging.
#yandere#male yandere#yandere male#yandere boy#recommendations#recs#rec#recommended#webtoon#In the Doghouse#2024
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Silence
pairing: Thomas Shelby x Reader
Summary: He only cared about himself, leaving you to rot away.
Genre: Darkfic (?), angst
Word count: 1.9k
Note: Ultraviolence is effecting my life negatively but i can't seem to let go.
⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅
He loved his women weak, thin, and obedient.
You would be considered none of those things before you met Thomas. Tired, deadly sick, he was the reason. Having to worry about his well-being so much you forgot who you were.
No, he didn't care about your condition, in his eyes you were perfect…Weak, thin, and obedient.
Watching him sip his whisky, chatting with his family. He didn't care, of course, he didn't. He's Thomas Fucking Shelby for fucks sake.
Why must I suffer with all the damage he has caused me throughout the entirety of this relationship while he gets to be content and the bigger person?
After the family dinner, you guys left as soon as possible while the others stayed to chat around and drink. You walked with cautious steps while he hurried in the driver's seat. Not even opening the door for me? Such a gentleman. You made yourself comfortable in the passenger's seat, sitting extremely close to the door that if it opened out of the blue you'd be dragged out of the car and broke your bones.
Watching the trees pass by made you the tiniest bit of happy till you noticed his intense glare from the window's reflection.
"Quit staring outside, it's nothing you haven't seen before." And just like that he was back to driving.
You being yourself, couldn't keep up with his antics anymore.
"You know, it's funny you say that. Life is beautiful but you don't have a clue-" "Oh don't start now. I'm sick of you being optimistic all the damn time!!"
Silence.
"I'm not well…"
"What are you talking about? You look perfectly fine to me-"
"TO YOU!…to you only. You know Thomas, you…you make me weak, you're the reason why I'm so…broken."
Silence.
Now it was his turn to be shocked. He was just about to start yelling before you decided to interfere.
"You, Thomas Shelby, are unfixable. All you do is make people around you feel worse, you're one neglectful lover."
The drive back home was silent. Too silent. You were crumbling silently.
⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅
#cillian murphy#cillian murphy imagine#cillian fic#cillian x reader#fem!reader#peaky blinder imagine#peaky blinders fanfiction#thomas shelby#thomas shelby fanfic#thomas shelby x y/n#thomas shelby x reader#thomas shelby x imagine#peaky blinders#tommy shelby x you#tommy shelby x reader#tommy shelby#cillian x y/n#cillian x fem!reader#tommy shelby fanfic
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𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫
ft: Giyu tomioka and Muichiro Tokito ・mui implied platonic but can be read as romantic
I never wrote for giyu so I hope this is alright ! Also this was just a ramble about them and their hair mmnmjmjn
# giyu !! ☆
While GIYU can’t say he doesn’t know how to do his hair, the boy just doesn’t know how to do it properly. After Sabito and Makomo’s death he stopped putting real time into himself. He’ll do the bare minimum to get himself through the day. In his opinion it’s just “the thought that counts” even though you both know not much thought goes into it at all.
It isn’t until you drag him into your bathroom to actually take care of his hair that it comes back into the picture. He’s heard from Mitsuri and whisper of other female slayers about the pain of dealing with “a disaster of a bad hair day.” Tomioka can only give you a look as if it was a silent apology that you were going to have to deal with his “disaster” when it came to the glob of hair on his head.
Giyu shifts in his chair as his eyes stay focused onto the ground. He can hear how you search for different supplies, different brushes and combs that would fit his hair. His mind reminisces on the whispers he heard from girls gossiping about their own experiences as now the guilt sets in.
“..I’m sorry”
Your eyes turn towards the male who seemed to stay perfectly still in the chair you dragged him to. “Giyu? Did you say something?” You ask the black haired male.
He hesitates for a moment before slowly shaking his head. His body still facing away from you as the only thing moving was his head. “I said.. thank you.” You can only shrug off the doubt that clouded his voice.
Much to his surprise, the feeling of his hair being properly washed is something he wouldn’t imagine he expected to like so much. He couldn’t tell if it was the actually feeling of cleansing his hair, or if It was your fingers that glided and ran through his hair with so much patience. His shoulders slouched as the tense feeling in his body was no longer presence. A sigh would escape his lips as his eyes slowly closed embracing himself in the comfort fully.
While you may of only done this once, it’s a moment that quickly jumps to Tomioka’s favorites. The moment brought a feeling of so much intimacy that he wasn’t expecting. For a moment he felt like he could breathe, the burdens of his comrades who have long pasted on, the burdens of serving as a hashira, the burdens of life for a moment fell from his shoulders. The moment was just between the two of you an everlasting peace that lasted for such a short time but felt so long. Something he needed much more than he can express.
It won’t be a surprise when he sheepishly comes back to you after you both finished your mission for the day. Mumbling something about “the demons put up a decent fight. Unfortunately it messed my hair up greatly. Would you mind.. helping me fix it.” You can’t help but give a cheesy smile before bringing him back to the bathroom where it all started.
# Muichiro !! ☆
Poor poor Gyomei who unknowingly got roped into helping MUICHIRO learn how to do almost a boy thing properly while he attempts to regain his memories. While Gyomei shouldn’t be underestimated for his teaching skills as he trained Muichiro “back into a boy” as he puts it. Once it came to tackling his hair, is the line Gyomei wouldn’t cross.
You’ve heard rumors about his hair. That it was “more tangled than one could imagine” or, “so natty that it was unfixable.” You’ve never believed them of course but you couldn’t help but be curious about them. You only stared back at the boys hair while you could expect he was staring off into space like usual.
Like you expected, the rumors were false. What surprised you were how far off they really were. The comb ran through his hair, while you did encounter other issues with it, it was way easier than you imagined.
Moving the comb through Muichiro’s hair, you can only admire how much smoother it was compared to all the small rumors spread across the corps. You couldn’t help but wonder why his hair smelled so strange, not that it was bad but oddly familiar.
“What do you use for your hair mui?” you mutter. Silence falls upon the room for a moment until Muichiro collects himself as he snaps out of his thoughts.
“Mitsuri showed me how she does her own hair, so I use the same products as her.” he replies softly.
Oh, so that explains the smell. Your face goes blank for a moment before a soft chuckle escapes your lips at the new found information. You open your eyes once more to see Muichiro face properly in the mirror, a small smile creeping up onto his lips.
Muichiro secretly like when you style his hair. He doesn’t voice his opinion directly but you can tell by his actions and expressions he likes it. His favorite style is anything that includes something half up and half down. He thinks it makes him look cool. Though he still very open to try anything as long as your styling his hair.
He tends to drift back towards you whenever he feels the need to get his hair done. He’ll shuffle towards your direction with a comb or another style in his mind for his hair. While he think he just enjoys getting his hair done, Muichiro just enjoys having some peace for a moment and spending time around you.
#@.komoboko writes#kimetsu no yaiba#kny#kny x reader#kny fluff#demon slayer#demon slayer x reader#demon slayer fluff#fluff#headcanon#x reader#imagine#imagines#drabble#rambles#muichiro tokito#kny muichiro#muichiro x reader#giyuu tomioka#kny giyuu#giyu x reader
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Bottom Line Up Front (John Price x Reader)
Kate updates John on what her reconnaissance has uncovered.
1k words
CW: swearing, allusion to past sexual assault
feedback welcome!
Kate checks the incoming number on her ringing cell before swiveling away from her computer screen and answering. Her favourite current retiree is checking in, right on schedule, saving her a call.
“John, how are things?”
“Alright Kate, any news there?” John asks, paused at a stop light after dropping his love off at work.
“Yeah, actually. Let’s start with if you’re aware that there’s a photo of you and your lady on the internet, shall we?”
Kate asks, already knowing the answer.
“What?”
It gets John’s full attention. He’s navigating back to his love’s place, and nearly misses his turn at Kate’s revelation.
“Yeah, were you at a pub recently?”
“A few.” John stays cagey, unused to his habits off duty being under a microscope.
“Well, there is one over on Beecher’s Lane using a photo of you and a woman to advertise online.”
“Ah Christ, I knew that was trouble. She does trivia nights with her mates there.” He says by way of explanation.
He leaves out the part about her triumphant face at finally making it on to the leader board swaying his better judgement about the photo. Years of scrupulous image control to maintain his professionalism undone a few months into dating. Bloody hell.
“Well, they scanned it and posted it up. I can see why though, she’s very pretty. Well done, John. I can see why you kept her to yourself.”
“Alright, easy, you’re happily married Kate.”
John reminds her, a wave of possessiveness sweeping through him.
“Yeah, married but not dead.”
“She’s spoken for.” John growls, navigating a roundabout while Kate irritates him from afar.
“Obviously. I did some digging on my end on the name you gave. It’s come back with some colourful info. He’s ex-army, dishonorable discharged for sexual assault years ago. He’s done contract work in the past; one was with some of Col. Norris’ men. Ring any bells on that name?”
John’s processing as he drives, a sinking feeling in his gut.
“Of course, you think there’s more of a connection there?”
John’s memory of threatening the Colonel is clear as day, although it had been years and a long road since that incident. The mention of sexual assault has him tightening his grip on the steering wheel unconsciously.
“Norris is involved in the contract you turned down, that Gaz is on right now. Not sure yet, it is unusual that there would be a connection for a random B&E. I’m going to keep poking around. Certainly, it feels off. Your instincts remain sound, Captain.” Kate acknowledges John’s talent for uncovering bullshit.
John hums, internally thankful he’s already on his way to his love’s place to poke around and doubly grateful he turned down the contract weeks ago. He adds stopping by the pub to his list of errands.
“He didn’t put up much of a fight when I got there. You say he’s ex-army?”
“Well, personally, I think your reputation may have preceded you. If connection to you is what brought attention on her, they’d be looking to confirm they have the right woman, not rob her. He likely would have known you on sight, probably chose the best course of action to preserve his neck in the moment when the wrong person turned up.”
John’s blood runs cold as he pulls into his love's driveway. He idles in the car, staring at the door and the busted doorhandle, still unfixed, as dread sits like lead in his stomach. John’s done too much to be naïve to the potential outcomes.
“You think someone wants to leverage her against me? Norris?” John’s putting the information together quickly, following instincts.
“Maybe. You’ve certainly given him no reason to like you, and he could be harbouring a grudge for the way his men were treated. He’s got an ego and a chip on his shoulder. Like I said, I’m going to keep flipping stones. There’s nothing solid there yet.”
John sighs, scratching his cheek before replying.
“Alright, thanks Kate. I’d hate to be right on this, but better to get ahead of it. Maybe let Gaz know something is up, if it’s connection to me they’re after. Better safe than sorry.”
“Already in motion. In the meantime, it goes without saying that I would encourage you to keep her away from the apartment.”
Kate swivels back to her computer, a notification blinking in the bottom corner.
“She won’t be going back. She’s moving out.”
“You found a place that quickly? Impressive, John.”
Kate’s tone is vaguely distracted as she reads the incoming message.
“She’s moved in with me.”
There’s a pregnant pause on the other end of the line for a moment. John has a feeling he has her full attention once again.
“Well, I suppose that makes sense, but that’s moving faster than I would have expected from a bachelor like yourself, Captain. What’s next, going to marry her before spring rolls around?”
John presses his lips together in exasperation. Kate is teasing but there’s a vein of incredulity running underneath her comments that John can hear. He can’t totally blame her; this part of his life had been strictly off-limits. For the exact reason unfolding now, to his immense frustration. From the outside looking in, it would look like sudden madness, he’s sure. On some level, he wonders if it is, a man like him trying to retire into a normal life.
“I don’t need time to get to know her Kate, I’ve known her forever.” John reminds her. “Christ, you’re making me miss dealing with Simon. He doesn’t ask this many questions.”
“Who do you think found the photo, John?”
He finally turns the car off, exhaling into the phone.
“Jesus Christ, Kate.”
“He was concerned that you were slipping, letting that get posted. He’ll be relieved to know you sniffed this out.”
“Him and I both. Keep me posted on what else you find.”
John’s back to giving orders he’s no longer got any business giving and Kate humours him, the stress in his voice evident to her long-trained ear.
“Rog that, John. You keep yourselves safe until we get more details.”
Next Chapter
Tag list:
@deadbranch @beebeechaos @cadotoast @syoddeye @writeforfandoms @itr-00 @chloepluto1306 @batw3nch
#fanfic#call of duty#captain john price#john price x reader#john price cod#john price#friends to lovers#john price x f!reader#john price x you#captain price#kate laswell#reconnaissance
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you are unfixable.
rafe is a possessive individual. obsessive, controlling. but you love him, right? so you surely must obey when he tells you not to do something, thats what he expects and thats how it will be. you're his.
warnings: abusive relationship, toxic boyfriend, possessive and obsessive behaviour, side jj x reader, domestic violence
(not mine gif)
the air felt scary inside his car, you were quietly staring at the window, not even breathing properly, scared of how your boyfriend would react. the silence made you even more anxious that if he was yelling instead.
no music, nothing. just the sound of the wheels.
till he broke it.
"what were you two even talking about? huh?"
"i told you, rafe, he just tried to have a normal conversation!" you said clearly annoyed.
he glanced at you.
"i already told you several times, i don't want you talking to that guy!" he almost shouted. his face looked red. his tone was harsh, but he tried not to scream yet.
"rafe...this is crazy! please, see things how they really are, i'm your girlfriend! it is not like i would go out there flirting with anyone else, i love you!"
you wanted to cry at how angry and sad you felt.
"i- i know, but..." he nodded his head, staring at his own hands "i know jj likes you, okay? and i just want to make sure he doesn't think he stand a chance with you"
"what are you talking about?" you furrowed your eyebrows. jj and you were never close, but whenever you had the opportunity to talk, it was something nice, fresh. he was a good company. you were sure he never saw you as anything else than a possible friendship.
"i see how he looks at you... the same way as i do, y/n" you breathed heavily. rafe wasn't just dramatic, he was THE drama queen himself. "don't give me that look!"
"what look?"
"the one you're giving me right now! like...like i'm crazy or something!" his eyes were full of tears, he was holding the steering wheel with a tight grip, his hands looked white.
"look" you said, trying to calm down . there was a brief moment of silence, you were thinking about the right words. "i've been thinking a lot about it, and... rafe, i'm not being healthy for you. our relationship is not healthy for you."
his eyes went wide, knowing what you were about to say. his heart beated so fast he considered he would might have a heart attack.
he knew it. he knew he was a fucking freak, but he couldn't find a healthier way to cope. he was totally, completely obsessed with you, he felt like throwing up by the mere thought of life without you. he knew it was far more than love, he knew it was sick.
"you need to focus on yourself by now, you know? try to stay clean, go see a therapist, take care of your mind and soul-"
before you could finish, he raced the car again. but this time, much faster than before.
"rafe, slow down!"
he kept going faster and faster, till the point where you were almost crying.
"RAFE! STOP!"
he didn't. and thats when you grabbed his arm, desperatedly trying to make him stop.
"please, please rafe, stop right now!"
you were so scared. it was a dark road, you could barely see anything in front of you.
he stopped.
you were breathless. your heart felt anxious, remembering the times where your dad used to fight with your mom and race the car, exactly like this, and threat to kill you and her.
rafe grabbed your wrist on his arm, tightly. "look at me"
you stared immediately, scared for your life. for some reason, you had jj in mind. would this ever happen if you were with him instead? what about the calm, fresh love you always wanted? this wasn't life. love wasn't supposed to be this dark. what if you had never met rafe and were close to jj instead?
of course he was also up for some trouble, but clearly not as extreme as your boyfriend.
"i love you more than i even love myself. but that doesn't mean i will let you hurt me like this and be just fine" he then cupped your jaw. you couldn't hold your sobs anymore.
"i can't live without you, baby, i'm not even phisically able to do it... so you're gonna be with me for the rest of my goddamn life, you get it? i'm gonna marry you soon and we're gonna leave this piece of shit of island, and it's gonna be just us. none of those filthy friends you have, none else but me and you." he tapped your head with his fingers, he didn't blink during the whole time he was saying this. staring at you dead in the eyes. "i'm not joking when i say that i would kill for you, and that including you, baby. you're not gonna leave me, ever"
"i wish i never met you" you cried. immediately regreting, but your emotions were speaking louder.
the slap was so hard you felt like your face and ear was burning on fire.
"we're gonna wash that little pretty mouth of yours once we get home."
#rafe x you#dark rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron#rafe x reader#drew starkey#outer banks#obx fic#dark rafe
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shades of cool - zen'in naoya
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ 10k follower event special! ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
word count: 16.5k
warnings: swearing. a semi-soft naoya fic bcuz i'm a f r e a k.
summary: naoya doesn't need to love you when the fate of your arranged marriage had been written when you were only kids. and of course, he'd never actually fall for you.
more info: arranged marriage!au enemies (sorta) to friends (sorta) to lovers, obviously he's out of character
a/n: i am so sick in the head for writing this. adding him to this even was such a... choice. don't request stuff for him i will delete the ask in shame <3
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
[ but i can’t fix him, can’t make him better. and i can’t do nothing about his strange weather. cause you are unfixable. i can’t break through your world. cause you live in shades of cool. your heart is unbreakable ]
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
SUMMER, 1995
He’s six years old when Naoya first meets (y/l/n) (y/n). She’s freshly six and she looks it, too. Chubby cheeks colored pink from her obvious shyness. She’s standing behind her father’s legs, reaching for his hand even though he’s repeatedly dodged her hold or swatted her hand away.
Naoya’s spying on the scene in the entryway of the Zen’in estate, peeking through the second floor railing with a curious sort of glare on his face. He’d heard whispers among the staff of a visitor from one of the more powerful clans, and while normally Naoya couldn’t care less about the many people coming in and out of the compound, when he’d heard his own name mentioned one too many times in correlation with this visitor, intrigue got the best of him.
And surely she was the reason why. She was no older than him, dressed in a silk kimono that had to have been tailored just for her, and her hair swept back into a jeweled butterfly clip that sat at the back of her head. Although half of her hair was falling out of it, seeing as the hand that wasn’t desperately reaching for her father’s was tugging at the uncomfortable claw secured against her scalp, trying to relieve the tension of her hair being pulled so tightly. Naoya could almost scoff at how childish she looked.
He’s only been spying for a few minutes before his father is turning around and staring straight at him, the marble railings doing nothing to hide his crouching stature. His stomach drops with fear, expecting to be scolded and punished for eavesdropping, even though he hadn’t heard a thing the adults were saying. Instead, the head of the Zen’in clan beckons his son to descend the stairs and meet their visitor.
And although he wants to, he doesn’t hesitate. He’s upright and quickly making his way down to courteously introduce himself to their guests.
“Naoya, this is the head of the (y/l/n) Clan, you remember him, yes?” Naobito gestured to the man still swatting away at his daughter’s hand, prompting Naoya to tilt forward in a respectful bow.
“Yes, sir”
“It just so happens his daughter is your age,” Naobito continues, directing his gaze to where she stood.
She was just a small thing, so tiny Naoya could hardly believe she was even six years old. She was merely a pipsqueak, and her demeanor seemed so, too. Her eyes could barely meet his, opting instead to stare at his shoes. If his father weren’t standing there, he would’ve scoffed and walked away without so much as a second glance.
“It would be nice if you two could… get along,” Even Naobito seemed uncertain of this union. His son’s apprehension was clear in his rigid stance and bored expression, and the young (y/l/n) didn’t seem like she could hold her own. If that were the case, she didn’t stand a chance with his ruthless son. “Why don’t you show her around the compound while the adults chat, hm? Be a proper host”
Naoya looks up at his father, silently asking if this was the best use of his time. Naobito’s expression was unmoving, and unforgiving. There was no getting out of this, then.
“Fine” Naoya huffs, and he regrets the attitude when his father’s hand smacks up the back of his head. He doesn’t say anything else as he nods for the girl to follow him.
Once more she reaches for her father, only to be gently pushed towards Naoya, and against her will, she follows behind him.
She’s silent as he boredly walks her through each room, pointing here and there at cursed tools he wanted to show off, or expensive art he couldn’t care less about. A few times, Naoya even had to check over his shoulder that she was even still with him. She was like a mouse. If it weren’t for her buzzing cursed energy, he could forget she was there at all.
Every time he checks on her and her eyes meet his, his brows furrow. He couldn’t explain it, since she hadn’t actually said a word to him yet, but something about her irked him. He was certain there wasn’t a chance in hell they were going to be friends.
“What’s your deal anyways?”
His question is abrupt, and full of cruelty. He halts suddenly right before he’s about to show her the lame gardens that the staff tends to. The girl merely blinks, seemingly unphased by his blatant rudeness. At this point, he’s wondering if she’s a mute, or maybe just too stupid to—
“My deal?” She repeats, speaking for the first time.
Her voice isn’t as timid as he would have expected. It’s soft, but there’s an underlying boldness there, as though she were just waiting for her chance to tear into him. It flips a switch in him to put his guard up, the prickle on his skin reminding him of his older brothers’ torment. Perhaps she was just like them, playing the long game, stringing him along into thinking she was just another pipsqueak, when in reality she was about to pin him down and tie him up like a hog. Or at least, that’s what his brothers would have done.
“I dunno,” She hums, shrugging her shoulders with her lame answer. Naoya’s lip curls into an irritated snarl. He certainly wasn’t expecting that. “My dad said I had to come”
That’s all the more she tells him, and young Naoya scoffs. He’d only been around her for all of ten minutes and he was already over it.
“Whatever,” He mutters, pushing through the doors and not bothering to hold it open for her as she continues to follow him outdoors. “Just try to keep up, pipsqueak. Let’s get this over with”
And that’s exactly how he feels the next few times her father brings her along on his visits to the compound. Impatient, hurried, and most of all, irritated. Whatever the point was for having her here was lost on Naoya. She didn’t appear all that interested either, so why torture the both of them?
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
SPRING, 1997
They’re eight when Naoya finally comes to realize why the Zen’in and (y/l/n) Clans insist on the two of them spending so much time together. The idea makes his stomach churn and his throat fill with bile.
“You know this is all just an act, right?”
His words are sharp, as they always are, while (y/n’s) busy picking the weeds out of the grass around them. She insisted on gathering all the dandelions, no matter how much he criticized her for fawning over the dumb weed. After a few years of regular drop offs, where her father would smoke cigars with Zen’in Naobito and have adult conversation, she was stuck entertaining the young Zen’in.
Naoya wasn’t the most pleasant of company, when he did speak he never had anything nice to say, and when he wasn’t talking, he had a resting scowl on his face. Lucky for her, her patience seemed to know no bounds. Or perhaps she’d just gotten used to his shitty attitude.
(y/n) had grown up mastering the craft of being patient. Of smothering emotion from her face, especially ones such as disgust, or fear. Coming from a long line of sorcerers who had mastered the Reversed Cursed Technique, she was in line to be yet another higher grade sorcerer with the (y/l/n) name. Unfortunately, it had meant her training began young, and it was a gruesome lesson plan. She met many sorcerers who came to her estate after unruly battles and exorcisms, covered in laceration wounds or missing appendages. Any sign of weakness or apprehension had been taught out of her years before now. If she was too afraid to go near an injured sorcerer, there wasn’t a chance of her learning how to heal them. So it didn’t matter if it was a stranger or her own family crying out in agony as they tried to stop the heavy bleeding from a nasty injury, her first lesson was learning to keep a neutral face in the presence of gore.
This lesson came in handy during her visits with Naoya, as well.
“If you’re acting, you’re not all that good at it,” She replies. Her own choice of words are witty for an eight year old, snarky, even. But her voice is as soft as ever. “Or, are you trying to look like an ass all the time?”
When she looks up at him, her gap toothed smile is so large it takes up most of her face. She knows she’d gotten him good when he’s scowling and letting out an annoyed sound from the back of his throat. Truth be told, she didn’t have a clue as to what he was referring to, but the only way to keep herself amused during these little forced sessions was by picking dandelions and dishing his attitude back at him.
“You’ll never get a husband with that mouth,” Naoya bites back. “No self respecting man would ever want the hand of a girl that talks back”
She raises a brow at him, although her eyes are focused on the stems of a few yellow weeds in her hands as she diligently loops and knots them together. Her interest is far more captivated by the dying weed than the obnoxious brat keeping her company. Still, she pays him some attention, just for times’ sake.
“I don’t think I have to worry much about that,” She says with a small giggle, still knotting her pile of dandelions together. Naoya’s disinterested stare is focused on her handiwork as she calmly responds. He realizes distantly that she’s making a crown out of the damn things. He looks away then, thinking he was far too focused on her waste of time than he should be. “Don’t you think we’re a little young to have to think about marriage?” She asks.
Naoya sneers, his know-it-all attitude rearing it’s head as soon as it gets the chance.
“You don’t pay attention to anything, do you, pipsqueak?” He scoffs. (y/n) fights the urge to roll her eyes as she continues on with her crown. “You’re going to marry me”
Naoya’s filled with a sick sense of pride for an eight year old, revealing the big secret that their father’s had yet to share. He thinks he’s got her speechless now, and surely she’ll be shocked, maybe even cry. Naoya thinks he’d like to see her sniffle and whine over this news.
He’d certainly gagged when he’d heard the whispered rumors among the staff for the last few days. Anytime he’d heard their names brought up his nose would wrinkle, and he’d ball his hands into fists as he marched away from the ridiculous gossip.
But it’s silent for a few beats, and she appears as though she hasn’t even heard his announcement. His heartless grin begins to falter as he watches her admire her little ring of dandelions, lifting it to get a good look at it in the sun. A small smile stretches across her lips as she deems it finished, before setting it on her head.
“Were you listening?” His grin falls to a deep frown rather quickly.
(y/n) doesn’t let even a flicker of emotion cross her face as she finally turns to look at him. His dark eyes are wide with anticipation, and she knows he’s waiting for a dramatic reaction out of her. She’s not sure why, she’s never really been one for the theatrics, that was always him. Naoya was the one that wanted to march around, show off, and be relentlessly and pointlessly cruel. She was the one who sat and bore it without a word or any reaction at all, really. In the handful of times she’s been around him now, she had yet to understand his obnoxious personality.
“Yeah” She answers, simply, and without the notion of having anything more to say.
Naoya’s brows furrow harshly as he glares at her. He thinks he’ll never be able to understand this girl, much less get along with her. If she really was set to be his wife, he’d have to find every way he could to wiggle out of it.
“It’s an arranged marriage,” He spits out matter-of-factly. “Don’t you understand what that means?”
(y/n) nods her head, the loose crown of dandelions slipping around her ears.
“When we’re older, we’ll get married,” She replies. “It’s not that hard to figure out”
“You knew?” Naoya scoffs.
This time, she shakes her head.
“No, I didn’t,” She tells him, calm as ever. “But does it matter?
He blinks, his eyes wide and full of their usual nasty emotion, mixed with something else she’s never seen on him before. He almost looks lost.
“Don’t tell me you actually want that?” He asks, his voice lowering to a near whisper.
They were the only people in the gardens, always left alone to play and get to know each other, and they always sat there in mostly silence until it was time for her to go. Still, Naoya couldn’t bring himself to speak at a volume any higher than that. He couldn’t risk anyone possibly hearing his accusation.
To his displeasure, (y/n) shrugs. Shrugs. As if being arranged to marry him made no difference to her. As if she barely had any opinion of it at all. Sure, she might not have had a say, but she could think for herself, couldn’t she?
“I don’t really know anyone else,” She tells him, lifting the flower crown off her head to adjust some of the loose stems. “My parents insist on homeschooling me, so I don’t have friends. I’d rather marry someone I know than a stranger”
For the briefest of seconds, Naoya almost softens. He almost feels pity for her. He almost wishes things were different so neither one of them had to be in this position. But just as quickly as the thought crosses his mind, he’s bristling and snarling again.
“You can barely even manifest your cursed technique,” He scoffs. “You know that makes you weak, right?” His words are harsh, but judging from the lack of response from (y/n), he could almost believe she tuned him out completely. “What makes you think I would want a weak pipsqueak like you as my wife?”
Finally, she cracks, but not in the way he was hoping. Her eyes don’t water, she doesn’t sniffle, or even frown. She simply places the dandelion loop back on her head, and gives him a tiny, yet victorious smile.
“What makes you think you’ll have any choice in the matter?”
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
That question sat with Naoya for longer than he would’ve liked. Months pass, and each time he’s forced to see her again, his stomach is filled with the unfamiliar sensation of anxiety. He hates it. Hates the chill that crawls up his spine every time he has to greet her at the door and they have to go sit in the garden for hours on end.
He doesn’t enjoy talking to her, in fact, he despises it. He hates the way every time she speaks her voice is soft, and full of whimsy. Even as she tells him she still hasn’t mastered her Reversed Curse Technique, she sounds hopeful. Too hopeful. By the time they’re ten years old, she’s still struggling to get the hang of it.
Naoya spends most of his time ignoring her, or reminding her of her weakness. (y/n) spends most of her time picking the dandelions as she wanders the gardens, and not ignoring him nearly as much as she should.
She simply couldn’t help it. She’d meant it when she’d told him he was the closest thing to a friend she’d had, after all. The exception being her tutors and a few cousins that would entertain her when they visited. But they had an obligation to be kind to her, the only daughter of the head of the (y/l/n) Clan. Naoya, despite being her betrothed, held no obligation to her at all, and he certainly acted like it.
She had yet to figure him out, but as months turned into years, she was slowly getting a grasp on it. He was more deeply insecure than he would ever admit, and as soon as someone stumbled upon those insecurities, they were scrutinized, blown to bits by his harsh words.
Naoya wasn’t one to give any piece of himself to anyone. No matter how often she’d try to know him better, in order to care for him better, (y/n) made little to no progress. She was lucky if he spent the day with his mouth shut. She’s not sure he’s ever said a kind thing in his life, and after a few years, she’d given up completely on hoping he’d try.
Still, she didn’t put up a fight when she was brought to the Zen’in compound. She smiled and bowed and followed the dark haired boy out to the garden where he’d sit and yank up the grass while she searched for dandelions, or maybe a ladybug. If she were to be his wife, there would be plenty of time to get to know him later. Maybe as he grew older he’d soften around the edges, and he’d be easier to be around.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
SUMMER, 2000
When they’re eleven, (y/n) announces that she’d been accepted into a private school.
She’s grinning from ear to ear, practically glowing with excitement as she goes on to tell Naoya all about the new classes she’ll get to take, but most of all, all the friends she’d get to meet. She talks to him more that day than she’d ever had before.
He sits in annoyance as he’s stuck listening to her talk about her uniform of all things. But he doesn’t have it in him to tell her to shut up. Maybe because for once, he could be deluded into thinking she’s enjoying her time with him today. Even though naturally, she’s only in a good mood because of the coming school year.
“Kind of dumb to go to a school with non-sorcerers, isn’t it?” Is all he has to say when she’s finally finished rambling about all the great things about her new school.
“You think?” She muses, intrigued by his opinion for reasons that were beyond him.
“It is if you spend all your time gossiping and learning stupid non-sorcerer things,” Naoya says decidedly. “You should be focused on your technique, pipsqueak. Not friends”
(y/n) hums thoughtfully in response. She knows he’s only jealous, seeing as he didn’t have any friends. Of course she couldn’t say anything of the sorts to him, he’d probably beat her up for it. Instead, she gifts him with her patience.
“I think I can have friends and still work on my technique” She says decidedly.
Naoya scowls, as she predicted, but she doesn’t react to it, simply goes back to threading today’s dandelion crown together. He doesn’t have anything else to say, even with plenty of bitter thoughts forming in his mind. He keeps his mouth shut and counts down the minutes until her father collects her and takes her home.
Today when she leaves, she drops the dandelion crown in his hands with a smile as she says goodbye. Naoya grimaces at the ugly clump of dying weeds, and once she’s gone, drops it into the trash before going on with his day, not giving it a second thought.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
WINTER, 2003
The first time she gets a grasp on her Reversed Cursed Technique, they’re fourteen.
And despite the unforgiving coldness of the February afternoon, (y/n) insists that they still sit in the garden for the duration of her visit. Naoya tries to tell her that she’s stupid for wanting to spend their time out there where she was going to catch a cold, but when she doesn’t budge, he decides to let her suffer the consequences.
She was a quiet little pipsqueak, but she was stubborn as hell, and for some reason that afternoon, Naoya hadn’t been in the mood to bicker. It probably had something to do with his brothers taunting him all throughout breakfast. They’d learned that messing with him about his little girlfriend as they called her was the quickest way to get his temper to snap, much to their delight. It only meant that by the time she’d arrived, he’d already been broken down and was too mentally drained to put up a fight over something as silly as the cold.
“I’ve learned how to apply my Reversed Cursed Technique on myself” Is the first thing she tells him once they’re alone, sitting in a patch of dry, dead grass surrounded by banks of snow.
“About time” Naoya replies gruffly. She’s not surprised that he has nothing nice to say, she hadn’t expected anything different.
So instead she rolls up her sleeve, tucking it at her shoulder to reveal her entire bare arm. The little hairs stick up and her skin prickles with goosebumps in the frigid air, but she gives no other indication of being bothered by the cold.
When she displays the long, bumpy scar that extends from the dip in her shoulder, down her bicep, nearly all the way through her palm, Naoya can’t help but widen his eyes at the nasty scar. It’s puffy and pink, clearly still healing. He’s silent as he follows the raised skin from start to finish, before turning to look at her, trying to gauge what she was thinking based on the mostly neutral expression she wore.
She was an impossible person to read, it was one of her most annoying qualities. Naoya always believed himself to be gifted in reading others’ thoughts just by looking at their body language. Never once had he been able to penetrate (y/n’s) thoughts. Every time she spoke she found some way to catch him off guard. Even after these last few years, it would still induce a chill of anxiety to shiver down his spine.
“Learned one way or another,” She chuckles, before pulling her sleeve back down. “The scar should fade soon. I got to it a bit late” She explains.
Naoya’s brows fall into a furrow and his lips curl into a puzzled frown.
“You did that to yourself?” He asks, disgust laced in his tone at the cruel attempt at training. Sure, his clan would likely applaud her for it, but the ends didn’t exactly justify the means to him.
“No,” (y/n) scoffs quietly. “Slipped up during training and had a nasty scratch. Had I not moved when I did, I might’ve lost the whole arm”
His mouth opens, but no words come out. He doesn’t know what to say, his brain is running haywire with the possibilities. He wants to call her foolish for acquiring such a scar just from training. He wants to drag her by her clean arm to where her father is mindlessly chatting away with his and demand he use his own Reversed Cursed technique to fix it. She was his only daughter, wasn’t she? Couldn’t he have healed her up just fine?
He doesn’t fully believe her story, not with the way she’s talking about her training thus far, but he doesn’t call her out on it, either.
When he snaps his mouth shut again his jaw clenches, and his teeth grind together as he squashes every thought that crosses his mind.
“Well, it’s nasty,” He mutters, sounding uncharacteristically helpless. “But at least you can use your technique now”
(y/n) beams. That was as close to a compliment as she’s ever received from him.
“Hurt like hell, but worth it!” She declares, and the pride in her voice makes him sick. “I can’t wait to show the kids at school. They’ll think it’s cool. They’ve probably never seen stuff like this”
He gives a small nod in response. He couldn’t exactly argue with that. Non-sorcerers were bound to think of her as some sort of badass over such a scar. It would probably boost her popularity among the insects of her school. Naoya frowns to himself.
“You shouldn’t show people that,” He tells her, without much of a reason in his mind. She looks at him curiously, wrapping her arms around herself while still refusing to claim she was cold. There’s not an ounce of truth in his words as he talks out of his ass. “They’ll probably just pity you. They’ll probably think you did it for attention”
She hums, nodding back at him in understanding.
“You’re right,” She tells him, much to his surprise. “I wouldn’t want that”
When she leaves that day, he wonders if she actually took his advice. He wonders if the scar will be gone the next time he sees her.
It’s the first time he’s ever thought about her next visit.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
SPRING 2005
When they’re sixteen, Naoya notices a change in her.
Not just a physical one brought on by puberty and elegant growth into young adulthood. It wasn’t just her sharper jaw and thicker lashes, or the way her eyes had a way of piercing through his in an unsettling way. It wasn’t just her longer legs or the strength carried in her abdomen and arms. It was a mindset change, he was sure of it.
She was more confident in the way she carried herself. No longer did she try to reach for her father’s hand, barely casting him a second glance as they parted ways at the Zen’in compound’s entryway. She respectfully bowed her head, but that was it. She didn’t mess with the clip in her hair anymore, or avoid eye contact by staring at the ground. She was a little more poised, and a little more sure of herself.
And now when she was with Naoya, he could practically feel the change in her just from the way she looked at him. Inquisitive, with a small smirk on her face like she knew something he didn’t, and despite his better judgment, he was just dying to know what it was.
He had yet to decide if this change was a good one or not. She was more vocal than usual, witty in their bickering as she yet again forced him to spend their time in the garden. Her voice was still soft but her words were sharper than usual, more decisive. He thinks that having a wife so mouthy and bossy would be an inconvenience to him and his clan, but he’s not sure if voicing that now would be of service to him. He couldn’t go offending her father, not yet anyways, so he keeps his mouth shut and takes her out to her precious garden.
“I have some exciting news to tell you,” She says as soon as they’re alone outside.
Her gaze is fixed on a clump of hyacinths, which irks Naoya. No one else dared speak to him without looking at him, it was a respect thing. The staff, even his younger cousins and some older ones, they all held eye contact when speaking to him. She makes no effort to show him respect, but her manner isn’t intended to be cruel. This was the playful side of her personality that he was starting to despise. He grinds his teeth.
“I’ve been asked to the spring formal at my school”
She sounds delighted, and it’s clear in the way her eyes light up and her smile curls just right to show off pearly white teeth. She tells him this news like he’d been dying to know, like he’d cared at all. He scoffs, rolls his eyes as he leans back in the grass on his hands, careful not to catch his sleeves on the dirty ground.
“I’ve never heard of something more stupid”
“It’s a big deal,” (y/n) turns to him, her hands moving as she explains the details of the dance, how important a pretty dress is, how the most popular couple attending would be crowned spring prince and princess, all of which fell on disinterested ears as Naoya frowned and fought the urge to roll his eyes at everything she told him. “It’s sort of silly, but it’s not stupid,” She tells him with certainty. “Especially not since the most popular guy in my grade asked me,” She adds with a grin, leaning forward a bit to catch his attention. Surely he’d care about that little piece of information.
Naoya rolls his head against his shoulder as he gives her a bored stare. She’s still beaming, bright eyes flickering between his golden brown ones that fought so hard to keep their dull glare.
“Of course, he doesn’t know I’m technically betrothed” She adds, the word slipping off her tongue with syrupy, sticky sweetness. That had a reaction flashing across his face, miniscule changes in his twitching brow and narrowing eyes.
They never really talked about their arrangement. Not since bickering about it as kids, anyways. Naoya always assumed it was because neither one of them were all that fond of the idea of an arranged marriage, especially to one another, seeing as they got along about as well as oil and water. But here she was, bringing it up like it was nothing, like it carried no real weight. And she was teasing him about it.
It made something in his chest snap. Something sharp, something that had never been touched before.
“What, you’re asking for permission to go on a lame date to a lame school dance, with a lame non-sorcerer?” He scoffs at her, but his cruel words do nothing to hinder the excitement in her face.
“Permission? Of course not,” She shakes her head. Her eyes land on a stray dandelion not far from her reach, and she leans over to pluck it from the grass without hesitation. Old habits die hard. “You’re not my husband, I don’t recall signing any papers”
He scoffs again, his lips curling into a sarcastic grin. She knows he’s going to spit out some vile nonsense, but she can’t help but brighten further upon seeing his smile. It was a rare sight, after all.
“Not yet,” He corrects her. “But I’m sure if I were to tell my father about how unfaithful you’ve been acting, you’d be pulled out of that non-sorcerer school by the end of the day. And what then, pipsqueak?” He challenges.
She straightens her posture as she takes his challenge and runs with it. The old feelings of anxiety stir in his chest as she tilts her chin upwards . It was like she knew exactly what it took to get under his skin. When did she get so defiant?
“Immediately running to Daddy is so outdated, don’t you think?” Her voice drops an octave, and her smirk is widening just a bit as she watches it sink into his mind. “Besides, unfaithful feels a little strong” She adds with a short breath of a laugh.
“Not if you’re practically engaged” He snaps back quickly.
(y/n’s) the one to roll her eyes this time. He wants to hate it, instinct clawing up his throat and wanting him to tell her just how terrible of a wife she’d really make, that obedience was the first rule in marriage. But the words die there, swallowed down thickly and leaving his throat dry and scratchy. An aching throat could be the only explanation as to why he wouldn’t say a thing.
“Doesn’t there have to be a ring for that?” She snorts before chuckling to herself, a sound he’s never heard from her before, and doesn’t know what to do with now. He blinks, fire burning in his eyes the longer she puts up this stupid game. What was her ploy, anyways? “Or, you know, a proposal?” She fires back before he could even say anything.
Naoya clicks his tongue in irritation, turning his gaze in the opposite direction so she couldn’t see the way he fought to come up with something.
“I don’t care if you go to your stupid formal with some nobody,” He tells her in a mutter, still focusing his attention elsewhere, anything to keep from looking at her just yet. “Under the condition you’re not actually unfaithful, of course. No point in having you as a wife, then”
(y/n’s) eyes are fixed on him even though he won’t turn back to her. She can just barely make out the pink tips of his ears under the mop of dark hair that covers them. A tiny smile cracks at the corners of her lips as she hums to herself.
He turns to her then, his brows furrowed as always, his lips pressed into a thin line as always, and her small smile breaks into a wider grin.
And then, she’s laughing. His expression changes to one of confusion as bubble after bubble of laughter escapes her. The more she laughs, the harder it hits, until she’s nearly cackling with it. Even if he bothered to ask her what was so funny, she surely wouldn’t have been able to give him a proper answer. So he watches in his shocked state of confusion as she throws herself back on the grass, hands over her stomach as she laughs loudly.
“Hey!” He barks then, head whipping around to be sure no one could see this childish display. “Are you trying to stain your kimono?” He scolds her.
For some reason, she laughs harder. Naoya thinks he sees a tear slip down the side of her cheek as it continues with no end in sight. The expensive white silk she wore would likely have green stains all over the back now. Naoya winced, knowing he’d be the one to be scolded by both of their fathers for letting her so recklessly ruin the material.
Her feet are kicking against the soft grass as peels of obsessive laughter flies out of her. It goes on so long, Naoya lets out a humorless laugh himself, just barely smiling at the whole display.
He didn’t get the joke, not in the slightest, but as she opens her eyes and wipes away her tears while she looks up at him in her giggly state, he laughs just a little more, with just the slightest hint of genuine humor.
It takes a few minutes for (y/n) to completely calm down, her chest rising and falling as she took unsteady breaths to relax. Her eyes fall shut again as she lays in the sun and waits for her breathing to even out. She never does tell him what had cracked her up, but he doesn’t ask. He simply works to keep his expression neutral and uninterested while she basks in the sunny afternoon, still laying in the grass without a care in the world. She almost looks comfortable here, like she could be happy here.
And when she leaves, she drops the singular dandelion she’d plucked into his hand. She can tell by the look on his face that he has no intention of keeping it, and she doesn’t really care either way. But she smiles as the tips of her fingers graze over his palm while she hums a goodbye, and just like that, her and her father leave the compound.
Naoya hesitates before tossing it into the trash bin, giving the yellow weed a once over, just to see if he could see in it what she did. Defeated when he can’t find anything special, he tosses it.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
SUMMER, 2006
Being on the cusp of eighteen, Naoya’s certain that their time before a proper wedding was waning. Surely once they were both of age, there would be pressure from both clans for him to make his proposal, something dramatic and with as many eyes watching as possible. The idea makes him sick to his stomach, so he’s been trying not to think about it, but again, time was running out.
Her visits are growing more infrequent. It’s nearing the end of the month, and she’s only been around twice in that time. He’s not sure what to make of that, undecided on if her father is proving the point that he’d need to make his move soon, or maybe…
“You seem to be thinking a lot today,”
Her voice is soft, but it still manages to draw Naoya out of his busy head. He turns to look at her, giving her every ounce of his attention. There’s a small knot between her pinched brows, and he’s not sure he’s ever seen her look concerned for him before. It makes his chest do something strange.
Is that a stutter in his heartbeat? He worries about the implication. A stroke?
“Can’t be good for you” (y/n) finishes with a teasing little smirk on her face.
He scoffs, barely rolls his eyes, and the corner of his mouth betrays him as it tilts upward in her direction.
“Like you’d understand. You don’t have clan politics to worry about” He mutters, his eyes squinting as he turns to face forward again, the sun catching his line of sight harshly.
As always, they’re sat in the gardens. (y/n) had already collected her small pile of dandelions, and was diligently knotting them together to make her crown. She’d gotten better at it over the years, thickening the stems with extra of the weed to make it appear more full. Naoya sat with nothing better to do than be lost in his own thoughts, and occasionally watch her as she worked on her mindless craft.
“I don’t care to worry about clan politics the way you do,” She corrects him, casting him a glance for a mere second before going back to her stems. “And besides, the politics you worry about are prehistoric,” She adds with a scoff. “Medieval” She adds bitterly.
Naoya rolls his eyes in good nature.
“Like your clan is any different” He mumbles.
Her elbow knocks into his, and he turns to glare at her for the mock attack, but she’s smiling, and while the sun seems to make him wince, it does wonders to compliment her facial features.
And thinking that she looks beautiful isn’t necessarily a new thought… it’s not like he’s ever found her unattractive. She was always… pretty… in her quiet sort of way. But Naoya’s not yet used to thinking about her beauty every time he looks at her, and he hasn’t learned yet what it takes to squash those thoughts.
So for now he tries to pay it little to no mind. Rest assured, he will find a way to not think about it.
“No, they’re just the same, I’m afraid,” (y/n) hums, tilting her head slightly as she regards him. “But between you and me, I think I can escape it”
Naoya barks out a laugh. He doesn’t believe her.
“You don’t escape family,” He states bitterly. “You’re stuck with them whether you like it or not”
“You think?” She asks, arching an eyebrow at him. Ever so interested in what he thought, even when she thought he was wrong.
Naoya merely nods. He knew all too well that you were stuck in the life you were born into. Even if it meant under-achieving older brothers that didn’t deserve to be the head of the Clan, or the Hei. Even if it meant being forced into a marriage with a young woman who deserved much, much better than this life.
But he can’t say any of that. So he nods, and turns to face forward again.
“Well, I don’t think so,” She shrugs one of her shoulders. “I think we get some say in who we want in our lives,”
Says the girl forced to come sit here with me three times a month for the last ten years, Naoya thinks bitterly, but again, he keeps it to himself.
“Not that it’s easy, but,” She shrugs again. “I like to think so, anyways”
“What’s your grand escape plan, then, pipsqueak?” He asks, admittedly amused by her antics this afternoon. Which is odd, seeing as normally he’d find it childish, and ignore her.
Pink lips curl into a precious smile as she looks back at him.
“Love, of course”
He almost laughs, right in her face, which would have broken her seemingly fragile heart, but when she gives him her answer and he realizes it’s not a joke, he almost can’t stop himself. Almost. Naoya sinks his teeth into the inside of his cheek and clears his throat.
“Love?” He repeats and it comes out of his mouth like he’s never even heard of the concept. (y/n) chuckles as she nods back at him.
“Yeah, love,” She confirms. “You remember that guy that took me to spring formal?”
For fucks’ sake, she has to be joking. Naoya rolls his eyes as he drags a hand down his face in disbelief.
Despite his clear lack of interest, she goes on.
“Well we’ve hung out a few times now and it’s been… nice. He likes me and I think I could like him, so,” For a third time, she shrugs, like it was the easiest plan in the world. “I think if we fell in love, my father would have to let me off the hook a bit, wouldn’t he?”
No, no he wouldn’t, Naoya knows for a fact that when it comes to arranged marriages, there was no exception to the arrangement. Unless someone died, there wasn’t a chance of getting out of it. It didn’t matter if she bore this non-sorcerer’s children, this time next year, she would belong to him. On paper, at least.
“Your father is far more reasonable than mine,” Naoya sighs. For some reason, he can’t bring himself to tell her the whole truth. He continues to entertain her foolish ideas. “Have you talked to him about this yet?”
“Of course not!” Her voice squeaks as she gasps at the idea. Naoya can��t help but laugh a little bit at her bashful reaction.
“Does he know about this non-sorcerer-nobody at all?” He presses, and (y/n) chews on her bottom lip as she shakes her head. Naoya gives her a bored look, silently telling her that she was doomed already.
“Well what was I supposed to say?” She mumbles. “I didn’t want him to get the wrong idea”
“I told you not to go down the unfaithful route, pipsqueak,” Naoya sighs. “Now you’ll have to fess up to all of it”
“It’s not like I’ve done anything wrong,” She explains. “Yet…” She adds in a smaller voice.
“Thinkin’ about adultery is just as bad as the real thing,” Naoya chuckles. “At least in the elders’ eyes”
(y/n) narrows her eyes at him in mock irritation.
“We’re not married” She reminds him in a mutter. He only smirks back at her. He doesn’t have to say anything for her to know what he’s thinking.
Yet.
“Semantics,” He smirks.
She laughs despite herself. He seems relaxed today, and after so many years she finally feels like she’s getting the smallest of glimpses into the real him. She’s always wondered what Zen’in Naoya was really like, and she can’t help but feel eager to finally learn.
“Well, what’s the damage?” He huffs, acting as though he’s not dying to know the specifics of this little relationship she’s found herself in. “You didn’t sleep with him, did you?”
“What!? No!” She yelps at the accusation, and this time smacks the back of her hand against his arm.
“You abuse me, wife” He grumbles as he pretends to rub the spot to ease the nonexistent ache.
“We’ve just hung out a few times. Sometimes he helps me study, sometimes he brings me the drink I like from the cafe—”
“That stuff doesn’t matter” Naoya rolls his eyes. What silly little things she found interesting in a man. Women could be so simple.
“Sure it does,” (y/n) furrows his brows. “Quality time is-”
He could care less about the details, so he interrupts her.
“But you’ve kissed him, yeah?”
The question shuts her up immediately. She doesn’t try to deflect, or come up with a witty reply to snap back at him. She shuts her mouth and stares at her lap. At first he’s amused by the shy display, but as time passes, it begins to click for him that she’s embarrassed.
“You’re acting foolish, pipsqueak,” He barks out a laugh, throwing his head back as he does. Her face feels like it’s getting hotter by the second. She covers her cheeks with her hands to relieve the burn. “Your plan relies on childish love and you haven’t even kissed the guy? Who in their right mind will take you seriously?”
“It’s not childish,” She argues, her voice quiet, and her face still covered by her hands. “I just— there hasn’t been the right moment. S-something always came up,”
She grows quieter with every word, her humiliation washing over her like a wave of dread. Perhaps Naoya was the wrong person to come to with this.
“Like you’ve kissed people—” She tries to bicker with him, but there’s a glint in his eye as her words catch his interest, and something about the way he smirks and tilts his head makes her second guess herself as she shuts her mouth.
“Oh, don’t tell me,” He’s snickering before he can even finish his words. (y/n) wishes she could open up the ground and let it swallow her whole. “You’ve never kissed anyone, pipsqueak?”
“Would you stop calling me that?” She sighs, but it’s no use. He’s got his paws on a juicy piece of embarrassing information. His brutal nature was about to come out in full force.
“And here I was worried about a second-hand wife” He scoffs.
“Hey—!”
“So why are you hitching your whole plan onto a guy you don’t like, hm? Shouldn’t you go out with a bang?” He smirks and leans back on his elbows. “Or at least a kiss-”
“Excuse me? I do too like him” She cuts him off before his cockiness could get overbearing.
“If you liked him, you would’ve kissed him already,” Naoya rolls his eyes. “I think you need a different plan of action”
“Well I— I mean I would kiss him,” She stammered over her words. “There just hasn’t been a good time—”
“Haven’t you known him for like a year?” Naoya sneers. “Bit of a prude, hm?”
(y/n) drops her hands from her face to gape at him, smacking his arm once more.
“I am not!” She whines, followed by a quiet, “You don’t think he thinks that, do you?”
He huffs.
“I am not going to sit here and gossip about this bullshit with-”
“Naoya, now you have to help me” She interrupts him, moving forward and latching her hands together in a pleading motion.
His eyes widen and his brows furrow. He’s not sure how he landed on this timeline, but this? Since when was she so open and personal with him? What was this treatment? Was it some sort of punishment? Did he do something in a past life to warrant this?
“I don’t have to do sh—”
“Please?” (y/n) bats her eyelashes, and he’s starting to think she might be a witch. “Just some advice, that’s all,” She tells him. “Since you’ve clearly kissed so many people”
He rolls his eyes, before sitting up off his arms. That’s not exactly what he’d said. But he smirks to himself. There wasn’t any harm in letting her believe that, was there?
“Whatever. You don’t need advice. You just need to pluck up some courage”
She frowns at him.
“I have courage,” She states. “It’s not about courage”
“Oh yeah?” He chuckles to himself. “Then why exactly haven’t you made a move?”
(y/n) frowns, dropping her gaze to go back to working on her dandelion crown.
“Well I thought he’d make the first move. And then he never really did and… now I’m sorta… relying on it, I guess,” She sighs and drops the dandelion loop back into her lap. “Shit. He doesn’t even like me, does he?”
Naoya laughs, a real laugh, with a real smile flashing across his face. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind that some non-sorcerer-nobody wasn’t completely enamored in a girl like her.
“No,” He disagrees, the word firm, certain. “Sounds like you’ve just picked a coward. Can’t say I’m surprised, pipsqueak, I don’t know why you’d go for a non-sorcerer-”
“This part’s not helpful”
“—but, you’ll probably just have to make the first move. It’s not hard. You’ll be fine”
She frowns at him, and it takes an effort for him to not roll his eyes back at her. She couldn’t be serious.
“Just kiss him, (y/n). Don’t be stupid. It’s unbecoming of you. But you are seventeen, and it’s a little embarrassing of you, too”
Her frown turns into a look of offense, and he can’t help but laugh a bit again.
“Don’t laugh at me. And don’t call me embarrassing! You’re the one that told me I couldn’t be unfaithful”
“Yeah yeah,” He waves his hand dismissively. “If you’re so worried about it, then kiss me”
She freezes, her expression going blank while her eyes wildly flicker over his features, trying and failing for the thousandth time to try and figure him out.
He’d suggested so casually, like it was the most obvious solution, like it wouldn’t mean a thing.
Naoya raises his brows and purses his lips, waiting expectantly for her to decide what she was going to do.
“I— you can’t be—?”
“What difference does it make?” He asks, shaking his head nonchalantly. “Either you learn how to be a good kisser and you get your boring happily ever after with your non-sorcerer-nobody, or you end up married to me and you’ll only be kissing me for the rest of our lives anyways”
When he puts it like that, the hair on the back of her neck stands up. She’d always known in the back of her mind that at the end of the day, it was her and Naoya. Whether they were friends or partners didn’t matter, and arranged marriage only went one way. Most of the marriages in the more powerful clans weren’t exactly in loving relationships anyways, it was a mere power grab. A way to unite clans, or to brush dirty politics under the rug.
For over ten years she’d been brought to the Zen’in compound to play nice with Naobito’s youngest son. In all that time she struggled to figure out what that actually meant, how to actually treat him with kindness when all he knew was a sharp tongue and a cold shoulder. Over time she’d learned to sit back and let herself be entertained by him. If she couldn’t grow to like him, or worse love him, then she might as well find some amusement in his company.
But now he’s sitting beside her with the offer of a kiss, and not just any kiss, her first kiss, and he’s telling her that it’s for her greater plan of getting out of their arranged marriage? She can’t help but think he’s been using her for his own amusement all this time, as well. He must have had an ulterior motive.
“What’s in it for you?” Her eyes narrow inquisitively.
He scoffs at the question.
“A kiss is a kiss,” He shrugs. “But I’ll take it back if you’d rather—”
“No!” She’s louder than she means to be, and she jumps forward a little closer than she should, closing a significant amount of space between them. “I mean- no, you’re right, then you can tell me if I’m any good at it”
He pointedly eyes the small amount of space between them before tilting his head at her, a sly sort of smile on his face as he nods.
“Alright then, pipsqueak,” He hums, beckoning her forward with his hand. “Do your worst”
Her brows pinch together for a moment, before her eyes shift down to his lips with apprehension.
While she’s distracted by her uncertainty, Naoya keeps his focus on her. And for once, he lets himself really look at her. Her eyes are round with her nerves, just a little wider than usual, almost doe-like. Her pupils are dilating, and he could almost hear her thoughts just from watching her expression shift and change with each passing one. His gaze lowers when she tucks her bottom lip between her teeth, growing more unsure the longer she thinks about it.
Naoya figures she must be having girlish thoughts. She was probably worried about losing her first kiss over what was essentially a dare, and would be meaningless. She was probably worrying herself sick knowing that after this, he would forever be her first kiss, whether she liked it or not. He could almost scoff at the notion.
The plush of her lip gives under her teeth as she slides it back and forth anxiously. Naoya watches the action religiously, lost in thought about how pink her lips are, and how he’d never really given them much thought. Despite her worried gnawing, they look soft, plump, even. He thinks just from looking at them that she’s bound to be a good kisser with lips like those. If his own mind weren’t going so haywire with having her so close, maybe he’d make the choice for her and kiss her first.
But he’s too occupied. Her perfume is wafting up his nose with the lightest scent of something flowery and sugary. He’s breathing a little deeper to take more of it in, addicted to the feminine scent after just a few whiffs, but he’s doing it so slowly so that she won’t notice that he’s about to suffocate himself.
“Naoya,” She says his name and it comes out like a scold. He arches a brow when he drags his eyes back up to hers. She pouts at him. “You have to close your eyes, you can’t stare at me like that”
Her cheeks are pink, he notes the rosy blush that’s dusted across her nose, and the longer he watches, he swears he sees the color darkening. Was she really that flustered just from a little staring?
“Like what?” He finds himself asking without really thinking. A nervous laugh escapes her as she sets her gaze on anything but his prying eyes. The golden brown hue were piercing right through her it seemed, building up her nervous anxiety.
“Just— just close your eyes” She stutters out.
Naoya rolls his eyes, but eventually follows the instruction, letting them fall shut.
“I don’t like being told what to do, pipsqueak,” He says, and with his eyes closed, she finds the confidence to reach forward, fingertips barely skimming over his chin, and then along his sharp jaw. She doesn’t miss the way his throat bobs when he swallowed thickly. “And hurry it up, I’m getting bored-”
“I don’t like being told what to do either,” She quips, but her voice is barely above a whisper, soft breaths fanning over his lips. “I just— give me a damn second”
She knows if his eyes were open, he’d be rolling them. Jackass.
He can feel her fingers trembling against his skin, resulting in the lightest of tapping against his jaw. His lips curl upwards against his will.
“Princess, breathe,” He mumbles, blindly reaching up for her hand, wrapping her fingers with his own. “It’s just a kiss, what is it that you’re stressing this hard over?”
“Well w-what if this all doesn’t work out and th-then—”
“I said breathe,” He commands, and despite the instruction being in her best interest, his tone is sharp. She obeys it immediately, shutting her mouth and breathing in deeply through her nose, before slowly letting it out. He waits until she’s no longer shaking before speaking again. “D’you want me to do it?”
Her eyes snap up to his, although he’s kept them closed all this time. She can’t believe he hasn’t cheated on her rule.
“No, I… I can do it” She mumbles with certainty, before tilting forward in the smallest movement.
The tip of her nose touches his for a moment, before brushing past as she gets closer. Her fingers press a little more firmly against his jaw, making sure he won’t move when she finally does it.
Her heart is beating so hard in her chest she knows he can hear it, if not feel it as she shuffles closer to him. She can’t believe he hasn’t teased her for it. Maybe he’s just waiting, so once she kisses him and this is all over, he can torment her and hang it over her head for the rest of their lives.
But just as the bitter thought crosses her mind, her eyes flicker down to where his hand is still loosely wrapped around one of hers, keeping her touch present against his jaw, and keeping them still. It’s not a firm hold, but gentle, so loose she knows if she were to pull away he’d drop it instantly. And then she can’t help but feel that maybe Zen’in Naoya has a soft spot for her. Maybe there’s a side of him that’s quiet, and slow, and gentle, and maybe she can let go of her silly anxiety to indulge herself in that side of him.
She counts down from three in her head. Then closes her eyes. And leans the rest of the way forward.
As for Naoya, he can’t say he’s ever really thought about his first kiss. He wasn’t one to care about the milestone of it, or really any of the specifics. If it had crossed his mind in the past, it was only with the intention of wanting to kiss a worthy girl. A pretty girl. Beyond that, fireworks or romance wasn’t even in the question. It didn’t really matter.
But (y/n’s) lips are even softer than they looked. They’re timid, unmoving when they first touch his. He’s surprised she even followed through with it, he was completely prepared for her to chicken out and beg him to forget the whole thing. Next thing he knows she’s kissing him and he kisses her back as soon as he realizes she’s not shyly backing away after two seconds. She follows his lead slowly, her fingers pushing along his jawline until they reach the soft locks of hair that just barely hangs past his ears.
He wasn’t prepared for this.
It wasn’t fireworks, and it wasn’t some grand romantic gesture either.
It was… peaceful. Like sinking into a warm bath after a long day of training.
It was warm, and comfortable. Like the first day of spring once the snow had all melted away and the flowers were getting ready to bloom once more.
A kiss is a kiss, he’d told her, like a damn fool.
Naoya’s hands began to wander, dropping hers to cup them gently around her warm cheeks, making sure to touch her as softly as possible, so as not to startle her. She surprises him again when she leans carefully into his palm, lips still too enamored with his to pull away.
This was not just a kiss.
She lets out a soft sigh when they finally do part, lips still brushing his and her eyes still shut as she catches her breath quickly and quietly.
He’s frozen then, right through his bones. His hands are still on her face, his eyes are unblinking when she finally opens her own, shyly meeting his gaze. He thinks he must look like a fucking imbecile right about now, staring at her silently while she’s clearly waiting for his approval of her kissing ability.
But he can’t say a damn thing. He can’t move an inch. She’s rendered him weaker than he’s ever felt before.
The pad of her thumb mindlessly strokes a gentle shape at the junction where his jaw meets his neck, and his heart is stuttering again, just like earlier.
Except now he knows it’s not a medical condition.
It was beating like that for her.
“Well?” She murmurs, soft and hopeful as her eyes flicker in between his. “What’d you think?”
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
WINTER, 2008
Their eighteenth years came and went, and with it, the notion of an arranged marriage.
Naoya stood before his father, his hands currently curled into tight fists that were sure to leave crescent shapes in his palms with how harshly he dug his nails into the skin. His jaw was locked as he ground his teeth together to keep himself from blurting out something he’d regret, but his frustration was made abundantly evident.
It was more than frustration. He was livid.
“What the hell do you mean she’s not mine to marry?” He’d all but snarled at the head of the Zen’in Clan.
Naobito sat back in his chair, still focused on whatever paperwork was in front of him, as disinterested in the affairs of his son as ever.
Even now, while Naoya’s entire perception of the rest of his life was falling apart at the seams, the older man barely lifts his head when speaking.
“She never has been, son. Where is this sudden urgency to marry coming from?”
“Sudden urg-? What are you talking about?” Naoya throws his hands out, exasperated from this conversation going in circles. “Her father’s been dropping her off here with me for years in order for us to get to know each other. You’ve been arranging this marriage from behind the scenes since we were six”
Finally, Naobito raises his head just long enough to give his son a confused shake back and forth.
“You’re looking for things that aren’t there. Our intention was never to arrange for young (y/n) to marry you, Naoya,” He’s calm, despite his son’s rage being too large for the room. “What is this about?” He asks, dropping his pen as he regards his youngest son with a raised chin. “Am I to believe you’ve grown to care for her?”
“That doesn’t matter,” Naoya snaps with a scoff in his throat. “What matters is she was supposed to be my wife, she was meant to be my bride since we were kids, that— that was always-!”
“Her father never had an interest in you as a suitor,” Naobito lets out a scoff of his own, an amused smirk on his face. Naoya shuts his mouth, pressing his lips into a thin line as his anger starts to simmer. “You were too harsh, son. Too… sharp around the edges for his only daughter. Look at it from his perspective, hm? Head of his clan, only one heir and it’s his precious little girl. Would you be pulling strings to set her up with you?” Naobito scoffs again, this time followed by an amused chuckle. “Our clans only recently started mending things after our… history…” He trails off thoughtfully. “(y/l/n) (y/f/n) was never going to give away his only daughter to you, much less any of your brothers, or anyone who bore the Zen’in name”
Naoya’s chest is rising and falling so roughly, he wonders if this could be the brink of a panic attack. All his life he thought he’d be stuck with her. The last thirteen years, he’d thought that at the end of it all, she’d be the one by his side. And for a long time he resented her for it, hated her for it. And then, for some reason, without explanation, something changed. In the way she looked at him, in the way he felt about himself when he was around her, he couldn’t quite put a finger on when it happened.
But when she was seventeen and needed to get her first kiss out of the way, he was the one she went to.
And when she was fourteen and had just mastered her Reversed Cursed Technique, he was who she told proudly, even with the gruesome story.
And when they were eight, and he’d oh-so stupidly told her that they were being set up for an arranged betrothal, she’d told him she would marry him.
Yet here he stands at nineteen, having naively entered his father’s study with the intent of arranging the details of the proposal— the dowry, the location, the letter he’d have to write to (y/n’s) father— and for the first time in his life, he’s being told no.
“I don’t know what led you to believe you were to be her suitor, son”
“We both thought that was the arrangement,” He muttered. “Since we were kids, (y/n) and I thought-”
“She’s going to Tokyo this weekend, Naoya,” Naobito huffs, pinching his fingers through his mustache to relieve his stress from this pesky situation. “Her father is bringing her to meet with a young man around your age. He does intend on marrying her off, but he was waiting until it was appropriate”
Naoya’s hands are clenched into fists again. He couldn’t believe this.
“This isn’t— I won’t have this” He mutters.
That perks Naobito’s interest.
“Son, we can find suitors of other clans to-”
“I don’t need to be set up with weak, worthless, women!” He shouts over this father, possibly for the first time since he was a misbehaving child. “I already had a— there was already supposed to be—!”
He can’t find the words, or maybe just the strength to say them. But with a huff he’s spinning on his heel and marching back out of the study. He’d said his piece, and there was nothing more the head of the clan could do for the situation. It was out of their hands.
Naobito watches in silence as his son leaves, the heavy oak door slamming shut behind him. He hadn’t seen an outburst like that from his youngest son in years. He didn’t understand the nature of it all, because it wasn’t like Naoya to be infatuated with a person, much less a young woman with a cursed technique that parallels his in strength, but he didn’t know what else could have gotten him so worked up over the whole thing.
There wasn’t a chance Naoya truly had grown to love her, was there?
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
2009
For her twenty-first birthday, (y/n) was gifted a grand party. The guest list was extensive, the catering was expensive, and no cost was spared for the whole ordeal. The grand courtyard of the (y/l/n) estate was the perfect place to throw such an elegant party, complete with fountains, twinkling lights, and of course, live music. An expensive part for an expensive family. It was typical.
Naoya didn’t come to these sorts of events often. The idea of walking around and sucking up to whichever elitist family was hosting just seemed so… dull. The parties themselves were often the same thing over and over, appetizers, mingling with people that only wanted to show off, drinking, and then going home and feeling like shit.
And truthfully, he wasn’t going to go to this one. Even though he hadn’t seen (y/n) in over a year, and even once his father made it clear that while the Zen’ins had been invited, he was specifically requested to attend, from the birthday girl herself, he’d said.
So now here he was, with a permanent scowl on his face and a very expensive suit that he would never wear again. He doesn’t look like he wants to be here, because he doesn’t, and yet anyone who saw him that night would have said that he was on a mission to find someone. Whoever it was must have been important, seeing as he didn’t pause to talk to anyone.
But he figures she’d invited him specifically. She requested his attendance. The least he could do was wish her a happy birthday, right?
There’s a lot more he wants to say to her. A year and a half’s worth of messy thoughts that barely made sense to him but every bone in his body told him to find her and lay it all out. Even if he had to drag her away from her own party, and hold her by her shoulders to keep her in place so she’d listen.
Naoya didn’t chase people down. Ever.
So when fifteen minutes after his arrival he finally finds her, with The Honored One himself, he considers turning around and leaving without the intention of ever speaking to her again.
But it had to be Gojo Satoru of all people. Powerful, filthy fucking rich, charming, devilishly handsome, Special Grade, Gojo Fucking Satoru. It couldn’t have been any other eligible bachelor from a well of clan, it couldn’t have been some nobody for him to turn his nose up at and walk away from with a boost to the ego.
He stews for too long in his bitter thoughts, and from across the crowd of people, she sees him. It’s too late for him to turn around and leave unnoticed. She’s already picking up the skirt of her dress so her feet don’t trip over it as she quickly makes her way over to him.
He could still leave, he thinks distantly. But as she gets closer he can see that she’s smiling, she’s actually glad that he’s here, and once again he’s frozen while he’s reeling from the shock.
He still tries to maintain his scowl, he can’t have people getting the wrong idea once she’s close enough he can hear her delighted laughter and ramblings of “You came! You got my invite? It’s been so long!”.
And he hates it, he hates seeing her, especially when she’s so relieved to see him, especially when she looks so radiant, in her pretty party dress that’s draped so perfectly on her it must’ve been tailored, and with her hair falling around her shoulders and down her back so perfectly she didn’t even look real she looked fucking angelic—
“Naoya?”
His name falling from her lips has him blinking himself back to reality, his nasty expression falling momentarily as he takes her in and realizes she really is standing here right in front of him.
“You alright?” (y/n) asks, once it seems he’s conscious again. Her grin had morphed into a worried little smile. Shit, he can’t tear his eyes away from her lips.
“I’m fine,” He declares, void of any real emotion. “Happy birthday, by the way”
Her smile brightens a bit more then, and her eyes gleam too.
“Thank you,” She replies sheepishly. “I’m really glad you came, I wasn’t sure if you’d accept the invite”
“Yeah, it’s not really my thing” Naoya clicks his tongue as his eyes wander the courtyard, taking in the estate properly for the first time. Anything to distract himself from her.
“I know,” She sighs softly, her head tilting as she regards him, her cheeks inevitably warming up the longer she stares. “You changed your hair”
He looks back at her, still making the effort to keep his expression neutral, and she can tell, but she doesn’t comment on it.
“Yeah. While ago” He replies dryly.
It wasn’t long after he’d last seen her that he’d taken to a change in style. She just so happened to stop coming around with her father around that time.
“I like it,” She says quietly, a bit awkwardly.
At times it feels like she’s forgotten how to speak to him, not that he was ever the easiest person to get along with. Yet, in their time apart, she found herself missing him. Thinking about him. Wondering what he was up to, or if he ever thought about her.
“Oh, I know,” Her eyes light up with an idea, before she beckons him to follow her. “I should show you the gardens!”
Just like that, she’s leading him away from the party, away from the prying eyes of Gojo Satoru, who seems to watch the scandalous pair with a smirk on his face. Naoya scowls back at him, but ultimately focuses on following (y/n) around the courtyard, and then behind her estate.
“You do recall that you were the one that cared about the damn flowers, right?” He asks her once they’re far enough away that the voices of her partygoers were drowned out by the muffled music.
“And you don’t like being around crowds of people,” She reminds him, glancing over her shoulder with a proud grin on her face. He rolls his eyes at her. “I’m doing us both a favor!” She declares.
He’s not so convinced, but he doesn’t put up a fight. He simply tucks his hands in his pockets and bears it as they wander around the yard in the dark.
He tries to keep his damn mouth shut, he really does. But it doesn’t take long before he’s blurting out the thought on the front of his mind.
“So Daddy picked a Gojo for you, hm?”
As soon as it comes out, he regrets it. Because (y/n) isn’t shy in the way she pauses on her journey so that she can turn to face him with that curious look of hers. He’s never been interrogated by her, but he suspects it wouldn’t go well.
“I wouldn’t say that,” She muses, her words carefully picked out. “Not a Gojo anyways… more like, The Gojo, don’t you think?”
The smirk on her face tells him that he’s bearing witness to the witty side of her personality, the side that likes to poke and get reactions out of him that she knows she can. Naoya rolls his eyes again, and to his luck, (y/n) goes back to leading him out to the gardens.
“So full of it” He grumbles.
She giggles, having heard it.
“My father took me to Tokyo last year so we could meet. Mostly, I think he wanted to meet Satoru, he was a bit shell shocked. But we got along well. He’s… fun” Again, she’s careful with her words, and Naoya can tell. He grimaces, his hands forming fists in his pockets.
“So you hit it off then, hm?” He presses further, despite his gut feeling twisted enough. “Whatever happened to your non-sorcerer-nobody?”
“Oh,” It dawned on her that it really had been a while since they last spoke. “You were right,” She glances over her shoulder at him once more, her expression unreadable as she says, “I didn’t like him,” And then she’s facing forward again and finally reaching the gardens of the estate. “At least, not like I thought I did,” She clarifies. “Kinda hard to explain, I guess. He was a good guy and all just…” She shrugs her shoulders, and she couldn’t come up with anything else to say so she didn’t say anything at all.
Naoya nods, his brow furrowing as he glances over the large expanse of flowers and bushes, all trimmed and perfectly on display, even in the dark. A garden at night was probably one of the worst places to be. Not only was he stuck wandering around outside, but he couldn’t even see the damn things.
“To be honest, once I’d gone to my father to tell him about, well, having feelings for a non-sorcerer, I’d gone on my big speech about how I wasn’t ready to be married off, how I wasn’t ready to be a wife and how I wanted to travel and take on assignments exoricizing curses and— and trying to find the right field for my technique… anyways, I was pretty surprised when he told me I wasn’t arranged to married off at all,”
She’s looking at him, he can feel her soft yet piercing gaze staring right at him, but Naoya can’t bring himself to look away from whatever blue flowers were before him now.
“We had a great talk, though. He told me he wouldn’t marry me off if I wasn’t ready, and even then only if it were in my best interest and with my approval… not that this matters,” She mumbles the last part, realizing she was rambling on with nonsense. “I mean it’s what I wanted… but I guess I’m still sort of surprised that’s how it worked out”
(y/n) wraps her arms around herself, although it’s not a chilly night, she’s lured into the defensive stance as she drops her gaze from him.
He merely hums, barely nodding his head to agree. Saying he was surprised to find out they were never truly arranged to be married would have been an extreme understatement.
“Anyways…” The air is thick with an uncomfortable tension, and (y/n) nervously coughs to clear her throat. “How have you been doing?”
“Fine”
Naoya’s answer is quick, and sharp. (y/n) winces at the bite in the singular word, and her nerves begin to grow into irritation, but she tries to remain as calm and collected as always.
“Has your father been giving you more responsibilities for—”
“What the hell does it matter to you?”
She can’t keep her expression soft at the rude question. Her nose crinkles and her brows furrow as she narrows her eyes back at him.
“Excuse me?”
Her attitude comes out in less than a second and suddenly she’s crossing her arms and Naoya doesn’t think he’s ever seen her look this upset. There’s a twinge of guilt in his chest knowing he caused it with his coldness, but it passes as he’s quickly reminded of the reality they found themselves in.
“It doesn’t matter to you,” He scoffs, a humorless smile curling on his lips. “So what do you care?”
“What the hell is that supposed to—?”
He interrupts her before she could finish her question.
“What’s the point of even inviting me here, huh? Is this some sick ploy? You want to show off for once?”
Her eyes widened at the accusation out of left field. She doesn’t have a clue what he’s going on about, but it’s making her blood boil. It seemed that even when it came to him, her patience could wear thin. And his time was long overdue.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” She mutters at him, wrapping her arms a little tighter around herself. “I invited you because I wanted you to come,” She explained. “And I thought maybe even though this wasn’t your scene, you’d want to come, too”
Naoya rolls his eyes.
“Oh, spare me, pipsqueak,” The old nickname rolls off his tongue with nothing short of disgust, and he can see the way she recoils upon hearing it said in such a way. “You invited me, I came. We’re done now, yeah? You can run back to Satoru now”
Oh, he hadn’t missed the way she’d oh so affectionately called the world’s strongest sorcerer by his first fucking name.
(y/n) scowls back at him, which was something unfamiliar to the both of them. She was always the calm one, the collected, soft spoken one. Now she looked seconds away from smacking him across the face.
“What the hell is wrong with you tonight?” Her eyes are wide as they study his expression, trying to figure out what was going on in his head, seeing as he definitely wasn’t going to just be honest with her. “I mean, fuck, is it really so hard for you to believe I wanted you here?”
Naoya scoffs again, leaning back and facing away from her as he covers the upset expression on his face. This only makes her more upset, and the harsh laugh that escapes her throat is anything but humored.
“You’ve got to be kidding! After all this time, you can’t just say it can you? You can’t be real with me for even a minute?” She moves forward, trying to grab him by the arms to turn him to face her, but he doesn’t budge, and shrugs her off.
He couldn’t have her looking at him right now. Not when he was losing the battle of masking all of his emotions.
She huffs in defeat and throws her arms down when she fails to get him to look at her already. Against her will, her anger turns into something worse as tears begin to prick the corners of her eyes.
“You know, I was actually upset when my father said he wasn’t going to take me to see you anymore,” She spits at him, but the tiny waiver in her voice betrays her. She swallowed thickly to try to relieve the burn in her throat, but it was no use. He’d already heard the crack in her voice, and finally, he’s just barely turning his head to peek down at her. “Because I— I might not have known what I wanted, but I spent m-my whole, life, thinking that it’d always be y-you n’ me in the end”
His irritation is washed away as soon as he sees those doe eyes filled with tears. When he was younger, and more of a bratty asshole than a regular asshole, he would’ve loved to make her tick like this. He would’ve felt pride knowing he’d reduced her to childish tears.
Right now, he thinks he could throw up.
Suddenly too much of his attention is on her for her liking, and when he pulls his hands out of his pockets to reach for her, she smacks both of his hands away as harshly as she could bring herself to do.
“(y/n)—” He tried to scold her but she wasn’t having it, already gathering the skirt of her dress to storm off and leave him there.
“Forget it. You’re right. We’re nothing to each other now, right?” She laughs bitterly as she leaves as fast as she can in the stupid heels she’d decided to wear.
“I didn’t— (y/n)!” He breaks into a slight jog to catch up with her, darting in front of her to keep her from walking away too easily. “For fucks’ sake, would you just pause for a second?”
She glares at him, as well as she can through the tears clouding her vision.
“Why are you crying?” He asks, his tone significantly more gentle than before, but it still doesn’t quite cross that line into genuine compassion. It makes her scoff, before she’s roughly wiping the wetness from her cheeks.
“Because,” She answers lamely, looking down at her hands to make sure she wasn’t smearing makeup all over her face. “Because— you—! Why didn’t you at least call?”
His brows furrow, not following where her argument was going.
“Or write?” She adds before he can question her. “I haven’t seen you in a year, did you just… just…” Her chest is rising and falling unsteadily as she tries to catch her breath before she starts to cry again, but her efforts are futile. The longer she looks at him and his voice of emotion, the more the urge to sob her pathetic eyes out overwhelms her. “You forgot about me” She declares, quietly, her eyes shifting between his before focusing on the ground.
“Forgot about you?” He repeats her, clicking his tongue as she shakes his head.
She refuses to look at him, so he catches her chin under his forefinger, tilting her head upwards with a surprising amount of gentleness. She still tries to glare at him, but her furrowed brows and big sad eyes do nothing to ward him off.
“(y/n), I didn’t forget about you,” He tells her with more sincerity than she’s ever heard out of him before. “I’m sorry I didn’t reach out, I really am, alright? But the old man said you were off to Tokyo and you had other— real suitors to look for,” He explains, golden eyes never once leaving hers so that she could see he was telling her the truth. “What was I supposed to do, hm? What did you want me to do?”
Her lips quiver as they move, but no real words come out. He watches as she tries, as they form various shapes but inevitably she shakes her head as another tear slips down her cheek. She doesn’t know what he should’ve done, and what she wanted was too tall of an ask.
“(y/n),” He sighs, a frown forming on his face that makes her worried about what he had to say next. “You are far too powerful, and far too desirable as a suitor to be cryin’ over someone like me, alright?” He tells her. She opens her mouth to say something, but he’s quicker. “If anything, you should’ve forgotten about me as soon as you heard we weren’t—”
“I didn’t want to,” She finally finds her voice, her nose wrinkling as she sniffles quietly. “I didn’t want to forget. I— I didn’t want to go to Tokyo to meet other suitors, I— I didn’t even want to go out with that guy back in high school, I— I just—” Her stutter worsens and Naoya fits his palm over her cheek, not knowing what to say to soothe her emotions.
Her eyes shut and she leans into the warmth of his hand. She squeezes her eyes shut even tighter as she recalls when he’d last touched her like this. He’d kissed her, then.
“I wanted more time with you. I— I thought I’d have more time with you” She admits, barely raising above a whisper.
Naoya frowns when she looks up at him, her lashes sticky from her tears, her eyes full of an emotion he didn’t know what to do with. Of course he’d sweep her off her feet and kiss her until every tear had dried if he could.
So he shakes his head at her, a sad smile on his lips as he does.
“No, pipsqueak, you don’t want that,” He tells her with as much certainty as he can muster. She argues with him as she shakes her head back at him, and he even chuckles a bit. “You don’t,” He tells her seriously. “You need to be with someone your father has approved—”
“No I don’t,” She speaks up this time, shaking her head a little more vigorously to make her point. “I don’t, I don’t need him to—”
“(y/n), I’m serious,” He tells her, cupping her face in both hands now so she had to look at him and see just how much he meant it. “You wanted out of the arrangement, remember? You have a thousand lives to live still, you said so yourself. You wanted travel? And to exorcize curses?”
She frowns as he uses her words against her, and he sighs softly, his thumb stroking over her soft cheekbone thoughtfully. He shouldn’t even be this close to her, but he can’t help it. Seeing her cry because of him had his instincts making him do crazy things he’d come to regret soon enough.
“Why can’t I have both?” She mumbles, her eyes flickering between his.
He chuckles, and for a moment he actually smiles down at her.
“We don’t always get everything we want, pipsqueak” He mumbles, his thumb trailing downwards, around her smile line, and halting just under her lower lip.
“And that’s what you want, too?” She asks him, her brows knotting together. “You don’t want to see me anymore? You want me to— to go find another suitor in someone else?”
He would literally rather be dragged to the deepest pit of hell and burn for all of eternity without a second of relief from the pain.
His brow twitches.
“If that’s what’s best for you, then, yes” Naoya answers carefully.
“That’s not a real answer” She argues.
“It is” He retorts.
“It’s not,” She leans forward, close enough and fast enough that Naoya leans away to keep the distance between them. Her brow furrows. “If you didn’t want to see me anymore, then why did you come tonight?”
His suspicions were correct. He won’t hold up well being interrogated by her.
“It’s your birthday, you invited me” He states the facts, dropping his hands from her face.
(y/n) rolls her eyes, and she’s quick to grab his wrists, and she holds on tightly, making sure there wasn’t a chance he’d yank away from her.
“For once,” Her voice is soft, pleading. “Just once, please, just be honest with me,” She begs him, her eyes wide and round and just as hopeful as her words. “Please, Naoya, just… just tell me something real”
He can’t. And even worse he shouldn’t. If he were to stand before her right now and tell her precisely how bad he wanted her, that he thought about calling or writing every day since she’s been gone, that he’d lay awake at night considering a life of an unmarried clan head that would be hated both by his own clan and every other one, just because the thought of having to marry anyone but the girl he’d sworn himself to at eight years old made him physically sick. If he was honest with her now, there would be no taking any of it back. At this point, they could be redeemed. He could leave her now, hope for the best with her life with Gojo of all people, and maybe he’d have some peace of mind knowing she was at least treated well.
But there would always be that voice. The nagging one in the back of his mind. The one that wouldn’t let him rest if he never told her the truth.
And if after all this time she’d still have him, he would allow himself to be completely, utterly hers. If she wanted a life full of travel and long distance assignments, he’d agree to it. He’d bend over backwards to meet any ridiculous condition she held, as long as it meant that at the end of the day he was hers and she was his. He didn’t need a housewife, a cook, a maid, nor a woman to carry his heirs, he wouldn’t ask anything of her for the rest of their lives as long as she would call him hers.
Naoya frowns at her as he sighs, shoulders dropping and arms loosening in her hold as she stares at him expectantly. To his surprise, when he pulls them away, she lets him. Her hands fall slack at her sides, her face shadowed with hurt as she waits for him to turn and walk away from her.
He steps forward, closing the distance between them and laying his hands under her jaw, tilting her towards him just enough so it was easier for him to bend down and slam his lips against hers.
Her own hands are grabbing onto the lapels of his jacket and pulling, pulling, pulling until he’s practically stumbling just to get a little bit closer to her. Naoya drops a hand from her face in order to curl it over her hip, squeezing tightly before wrapping his arm around her back, keeping her snug against his chest so she couldn’t pull away before he was ready to let her go.
And that time had to come at some point, even though he’d die standing here just to kiss her for a few seconds longer. They’re already panting between messy kisses, neither one of them ready to give up just yet.
“Don’t,” She mumbles in between kisses, her hands reaching up to lay around his neck, fingers carding through the hair that laid over his nape, before curling and holding on to him there. “Don’t leave”
The hand that he still had resting around her cheek squeezed softly, and the kiss he gives her with it is slower, and lingers for just a few seconds longer than before. (y/n) squeezes her eyes shut, trying to hold onto every second of it, worried he was going to decide it was the last one.
When he pulls away, he doesn’t go far. His forehead is glued to hers, and their lips brush when he speaks quietly.
“Nothing could keep me from you, princess,” He murmurs, his thumb stroking her cheek in soothing movements. “I would’ve readily, happily taken you as my wife,”
Her eyes swell with tears again, and he’s quick to brush the wetness from under her lashes before they could fall. She’s overwhelmed with emotion. She’s never heard him speak so softly, so sweetly. Her heart is beating erratically, and holds onto him a little tighter, knowing now that her feelings had been reciprocated, that she wasn’t just making things up.
“I mean it, (y/n),” He continues, eyes moving between hers. “You were everything I ever wanted. I… I couldn’t stand not having you. It was always supposed to be you and me”
A watery laugh escapes her, her lips tilting into a smile as she shuts her eyes to try and will the tears to subside.
“Y-you do, you do have me,” She tells him through a whimper, before stealing a chaste kiss and rambling on again. “It’s always been you, I always wanted it to be you,” She cries. “I— I love you, Naoya”
Her face has never burned as much as it does now. In all her years of training herself to have complete control over her emotions, it feels as though a dam has been broken clean through. The honesty with herself and with him was so long overdue, it was as though as soon as she admitted it, a weight was lifted, a blockage removed from her path, and her heart felt so full it was as though the feeling couldn’t possibly be contained just by the beating muscle. For years she found herself picking apart Zen’in Naoya, reading between backhanded comments and a cold exterior, and it was taxing work, but the reward had proven to be oh so worth it.
His lips curl into a faint smile, in pure disbelief that this was happening right now. Her hands in his hair so tightly it would hurt to move, her face so close he could kiss her without moving a full inch, everything about her, from her pretty face to her genuine words, there wasn’t a doubt in his mind how he felt about her.
His smile twists into more of a grin as he reaches his hand up to push a stray lock of hair out of her face.
“I love you too, pipsqueak,” He tells her softly, earning a sweet smile out of her. “Bit unconventional though, don’t you think?”
“Good,” She murmurs, tilting forward to brush her lips over his. “I hate the outdated bullshit” She adds in a whisper before locking her lips with his again.
Naoya kisses her deeply. He kisses her like each one was going to be their last, like this was some cruel dream that he was going to wake up from anytime now, so he’d have to savor it. (y/n) hums delightedly into his mouth, eagerly returning the long-awaited passion.
“So you don’t want to marry me now?” He teases in between a couple more kisses. (y/n) laughs, struggling to meet his lips as she does.
“I couldn’t possibly accept a proposal on my birthday,” She scolds. “You’ll have to do better than that”
“Alright, fine then,” He agrees. “If you don’t make me hang around Gojo the rest of the night, I won’t propose”
She grins, looping her arms behind his neck and tilting her head at him with an affectionate look in her eye. There wasn’t a moment that she wasn’t beautiful, but he always thought she was the most beautiful when she was looking at him. It was as though she glowed.
He’d have to find a way to make it up to her— all the time he wasted not telling her how beautiful she truly was. He’d likely spend the rest of his life reminding her, and even then, he doesn’t think it would be enough.
“You’ve got a deal, Zen’in” She replies, before tilting onto the tips of her toes again to steal one more kiss.
It would prove to be difficult to explain to her father that the man she’d previously tried to prove she didn’t love and therefore couldn’t marry is now the only one she could ever love, and that when she thought about the distant future, she could only see herself by his side, no matter his clan, it was Naoya her heart belonged to. But she’s sure she could find some way to tell him the whole story and win him over the same way she’d been won over.
And if not, there was always eloping. She was the only heir to her clan after all. How hard could it be to pull some strings in the name of young love?
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
bonus:
To whom it may concern of the (y/l/n) estate,
While it is my understanding that your intentions aren’t to wed (y/n) off without her say in the matter, I’m writing to you to declare myself as her proper suitor. I plan on waiting a long while before officially making her my wife, but when the time is right and I’m sure that she won’t come to regret the choice, I will be taking her hand in marriage.
I’ve thought of her as my bride to be since we were children. Whether I was thrilled about the idea at the time or not, it was certain. She was my one true destiny, and that still rings true today. The truth is I love your daughter. And the prospect of making her my wife is something I’ve kept to myself for a long, long time.
When the time is right I will come to you in hopes of receiving a proper blessing. Trust that your family will have the full support and allyship for as long as we both shall live, and trust that your daughter will be in good hands, of a man who isn’t marrying out of satiating clan politics, but completely, and deeply out of his love for her.
Sincerely, Zen’in Naoya.
“Naoya?”
A tired voice from behind him has the man leaning up from his desk, just as he’s tucked his nearly written letter into a fresh envelope. (y/n) sits up slowly off the bed, rubbing one eye as she squints at him in the dark.
“What’re you doin’ up?” She mumbles. “Writing?”
“It’s nothing, pipsqueak,” He murmurs, standing from his chair and sliding it quietly back into place before making his way over to her. “Let’s go back to sleep, hm? It’s late”
“That’s what I’m sayin’,” She mumbles back at him. She coos when he’s back in bed and she’s able to curl back up on his chest. It doesn’t take long for sleep to overcome her again. “G’night”
“Goodnight, my love”
[ he lives for love... ]
___
a/n: there i did it i wrote a big ol' soft piece about na*ya zen'in bcuz i have a bitchass 'i can fix him' mentality </3
xoxo ~ jordie
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megumi hc!! (in my opinion😽)
‼️TW: slight nsfw 1-2 canons (im sorry😪)
•.¸♡ <3 ♡¸.•
• you cant tell me this guy’s top 3 love languages arent acts of service, gift gifting and words of affirmation.
• gentle with you yesterday, today, tonight. he is a gentle lover.
• megumi will LOVE at home dates but if he will take you out outside it will be a picnic in the park or stargazing while talking about yalls favourite things!
• if you are chubby, he will absolutely ADORE your chubbiness. squishing your waist, thigh, cheeks, arms and tummy!
• will buy EVERYTHING AT ANY COST that reminds him of you. keychains, charms, plushies, ANYTHING.
• is actually pretty vanilla. this boy is too shy to do anything to spicy without you.
• but if he will have kinks it will probably be something like gentle s3x and marks.
• he will buy you books, flowers, and jews (homemade of course), probably your gifts from him will be DIY.
• will watch films or read about a thing you mentioned once probably AGES ago.
• if he gets jealous, he wont make it obvious. prolly a hand around the waist or a peck at the neck or cheek. if he gets jealous and wants to say it he will handle it maturely.
• talking about maturity, he is very. bro is calm, gentle but never cold with you.
• will absolutely worship the ground you walk on.
• loves hand-holding.
• will ask to match pfp’s (black cat and an orange cat pfp’s)
• is absolutely majestic with his hair unfixed and wet
• CANT TAKE COMPLIMENTS
• will love you till his last breath
•.¸♡ <3 ♡¸.•
THANK YOU FOR THE SPEND TIME!!♥️
(follow me for more posts hehe /jk)
~(˘▾˘~) ~(˘▾˘)~ (~˘▾˘)~
#megumi fushiguro#jjk megumi#megumi x reader#jujutsu megumi#jujutsu kaisen megumi#jujutsu kaisen#headcanon#fushiguro#jjk#Spotify
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May I offer a headcnon?
Blind Zephyr
Thoughts, both solo and with Mountain below. Nothing explicit, but implied horny things in the distance.
Not completely blind, but their vessel has some unfixable eye impairment that limits sight and progressively worsens. That's why they were a band ghoul for such a brief period, their eyesight tanked after the tour ended. Eventually they end up functionally blind, just able to make out shapes and colors but nothing close to detail.
They adapt fairly well, but they do end up relying on the others a bit more at first. Especially Mountain, who's easiest to pick out in a crowd. Zephyr isn't a huge fan of siblings, and they've made the mistake of assuming a sister is Dew three times too many, so it's easier to look for the blob of beige that they know to be Mountain’s antlers.
Mountain doesn't mind.
He doesn't baby Zephyr the way Aether sometimes does, and he doesn't use kid gloves the way Dew and Ifrit tend to. Mountain is easy, honest. Helpful without being overbearing, doesn't presume to do things that Zephyr certainly can on their own. He waits for them to ask, and Zephyr is always silently appreciative.
They wish they could see more of his handsome face, though. Wish they could count the freckles speckled over his nose and cheeks for the hundredth time, that they could admire the squared off edges of his pupils and that one auburn streak in his hair.
But their memory will have to suffice - though Mountain never objects to letting Zephyr touch his face when they need a reminder. To bring the ridge of his brow and the hump on his nose back into sharper relief in their head.
Touching that, of course, never stops at Mountain's face.
Zephyr insists on facing him whenever they fall into bed, regardless of who's doing what. Mountain assured them that he will always look into their eyes, even if they cant see him, and Zephyr believes him.
After, Mountain will read to them. That's the one thing Zephyr misses more than any other, even more than their keys - being able to squirrel themself away into a nook in the library with a thermos of tea and a good book. But Mountain's voice is lovely, and the way his chest vibrates under Zephyr's ear is so soothing. Like this, they can forget their loss for a minute.
Mountain traces shapes into their skin while he reads, and Zephyr memorizes every one - hearts and stars and Z's and M's and nonsensical squiggles. Sometimes Zephyr will ask how a character's name is spelled, and Mountain will write it on their back while he spells it out loud.
Zephyr always drifts off faster than they intend to, but it's unavoidable. Mountain will finish out his chapter and they'll settle down, face to face, with Zephyr's hand over Mountain's heart. Just a reminder. Zephyr knows they don't have to, but they always thank Mountain for everything. He'll shush them, always, kiss their cheek, and for a second Zephyr will SWEAR they can see him.
They sleep the best those nights.
#miasma's work#the band ghost headcanons#zephyr ghoul#mountain ghoul#mountzeph#zephtain#mountain/zephyr#mountain x zephyr#idk its been on my mind for a while now
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Past, Present, Future
Astarion x Y/N - drabble - 1.2K WC
Masterlist
Warnings: prostitution, implications of SA, Loviatar worship, Astarion being such a saint of a boyfriend, depression, anxiety, self judgement, insecurities, angst, hurt/comfort, I'm in my sad girl hours and this is the product of that
----------------------------
Anyone with eyes could see that Astarion was beautiful. You loved him with every fiber of your being and you knew he loved you. However, that didn’t stop your intrusive thoughts. You were insecure, always have been. Life is not always kind to everyone, it's just an unfortunate fact. Your past did not make you feel any better. You were abandoned by your family at birth. They kindly left you at a convent, for the Goddess Loviatar. You were of course taken in, the goddess could not allow such a corruptible soul to leave. You grew up rough. Beatings, torture all in the worship of Bane. You could never commit to the religion, but it did break you and your spirit. Your soul was broken and unfixable, it was something you’d come to accept. You left the convent when you were young but with nothing to your name you fell into an… unsavory line of work. Sharessess Caress was a place you found refuge and a new kind of torment. People using your body day in and day out. This was worse than the beatings you had suffered in the past, a little piece of you died every time it happened, you felt as if nothing was left of you. Until the nautiloid. Until him. Your whole life had changed. You felt happy. You felt loved. You didn’t doubt Astarion’s dedication to you, of that you were certain. You were incessantly critical of yourself about everything. It made you depressed and you felt like such a burden to him sometimes. He was forced into his torment, yet you felt like yours was somehow your own fault. Watching him be himself so freely almost made you jealous.
He walked into your tent, you were laying on your bedroll watching the light from the lantern flicker on the ceiling. He knew that far off look, you were in a low. “Little love…” he said, laying down next to you, one arm wrapping around your waist.
You let out a soft sniffle, “Not feeling good right now Star…” you closed your eyes, a few tears silently slipping down.
Astarion sat up on one elbow, his other hand cradling your face. He knew of your past and how it made you feel. He promised you that you would never return to that life. He told you day in and day out of his love for you and the depth of that love. And yet, he knew your mind consumed itself in a vicious cycle.
“I don’t think we should be together, Star.” you whispered out.
Astarion’s whole body tensed and his breathing all but stopped. “No.” was his response.
You opened your eyes and finally faced him. “No?” You questioned.
“You heard me, I said no.” Was all he said back.
“But… but I…” you sputtered, not sure how to proceed with the conversation.
“Do you love me?” He asked simply.
You let out a long sigh, “You know I do, more than anything.”
“And I love you. So it’s settled, we stay together.” He shrugged as if it was the most simple conclusion he had ever made. And if it were anyone else, it would be.
“You shouldn’t be with me…” you laid back down, eyes distant and shedding tears.
“That’s for me to decide, not you. That belongs to me, it is my choice. And ya know what? I choose you. I’d choose you over anyone, every time, no matter what.” He said, whispering in your ear while delicately kissing your neck and cheek.
“I wish I wasn’t like this.” You turned your head so your cheek rested on the top of his head. You kissed his head and played with his hair, wanting to take in every bit of him. He was always so patient with you. You were truly amazed by him.
“But you are and that’s ok. Look at this body,” he said, sitting you up and swiveling you so you faced the mirror in your tent. You wanted to look away but he softly held your face forward.
“This is your home, it’s where you live. The food you eat, the water you drink, nourishes this body and keeps it happy. Look at those eyes, they help you see the world. The hands that hold me close at night. Your mind, which is so full and smart. This heart,” he said as he held your hand to your chest “that beats so loud and so strong despite everything that it’s been through. This soul, which is forever intertwined with mine. All of this is you. All of it is absolutely lovely.” He said, resting his head in the crook of your shoulder, kissing your neck softly over and over.
You let out a choked sob, holding his face in your hands. You kissed him gently, shakily. As if he were the most delicate glass.
“I love you. Past, present, and future. I will always be here and will always have you until you don’t want me.” he ran his thumbs over your wrists.
You shook your head, you’d never want to be rid of him. Even the thought made your heart hurt. “I’m sorry…” you whispered.
Astarion shushed you, pulling you into his chest. “No more of that… The evening is still young, dinner is in order for us both then a nice rest. Tomorrow is a new day.” You quickly tilted your head, giving him access to your neck. “You eat first my love.” he said kissing your neck before leaving the tent to go grab you a much deserved warm meal.
You sat up and looked at yourself in the mirror. Maybe you could start to see yourself the way he did.Your fingertips ghosted over your faces prominent features. Lips, nose, cheekbones. “You are worthy.” was all you whispered to your reflection. Astarion whispered the saying to you often at night when he thought you were long asleep. It was a saying that helped him quite a bit to accept his past and newfound freedom, perhaps it would help you to.
Astarion returned shortly, he watched you from the mouth of the tent as you spoke to your reflection. He knew your struggle better than anyone else. He knew it weighed on you heavily. But he also knew he could pull you out of it, just like you could pull him out of his lows. You two truly loved each other, anything beyond that could be dealt with. Together.
Astarion set the plate of steaming food down on the small table before sitting behind you. You leaned against his chest as he wrapped his arms around you snuggly. He kissed the top of your head before settling in the crook of your neck, breathing your scent in deeply. Your hand held him in place, savoring the moment.
“I love you.” you said in unison unexpectedly. For the first time that day, not only did you crack a smile but you laughed. A small laugh that made Astarion’s heart do flips. You shifted so you could hold his face in your hands. You kissed him over and over again, each kiss full of passion and gratitude. He held you close and kissed you back fervently before slowly laying you down and climbing on top of you.
Dinner was going to have to wait.
-----------------------
Naboo's Note:
Hello! I hope this was an ok piece, idk how I feel about it yet. All my pieces lately have been so sad lol I promise some fluff and smut are on their way soon. I hope everyone is well :) As always - thank you for the likes, comments, reblogs, and requests! Talk soon xoxoxoxoxoxo :)
#baldurs gate 3#astarion x tav#astarion x reader#bg3#writing#bg3 wyll#gale of waterdeep#karlach#lae'zel#isekai#baldursgate#baldur's gate 3#baldur's gate iii#baldurs gate astarion#baldurs gate fanart#baldurs gate tav#shadowheart#creative writing#writer#writer stuff#on writing#fanfic#fanfiction#ao3 fanfic#my fic#fic#baldurs gate#baldur's gate#bg 3#bg3 spoilers
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