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thesecondbatgirl · 2 years

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This is not as positive as you think it is

It’s still Rosh Hashanah, and I’m going to post part of those 17 essays I swore I would never write. Starting off the year as I mean to go on? Or something. I originally had this as the first thing on my list of essays that I would never write but would absolutely get me kicked out of Star Wars fandom but I am tired and cranky and I am going to explain why tagging fics where the Jedi Order reform and start allowing attachment as *Jedi Positive* piss me off so much.

First, let me make this clear. If you hate the Jedi Order and want to write those, go ahead. If you have issues with the Jedi and want to write those fics, go ahead. Nobody is stopping you. What I’m asking instead is to stop tagging them Pro-Jedi or Jedi positive. Use Jedi critical! Or not Jedi friendly! Please use those tags instead! Yes even if you think its Pro-Jedi! If you are saying that the Order needs to reform to be *good* then it is not Jedi friendly!

I mean, look, if you are writing those things then I have issues with the way you’re interrogating the text and will think that you’re *wrong* and also that you’re using some super problematic (and from my point of view, anti-semitic) tropes but if my 21+ years in fandom have taught me anything its that you are never going to get anyone to agree on anything, but tagging will at least allow us to have our own spaces? Like, you wouldn’t have gone into a [pairing of your choice] positive archive and post a fic where [pairing] break up because the one who isn’t your blorbo is abusive so your blorbo runs to *YOUR* OTP, because that wouldn’t fit the theme of the archive! So if your fic is saying that the old rules for the prequel Jedi are bad and need to be changed to be good, don’t put it with Jedi positive content!

So first. Attachment. Other people have talked about it better than I have, but have some links about what attachment means in the GFFA and no it really does not mean love.

(Listen I am not going to bother to rewrite the meta when Lumi has already done the work for me)

https://gffa.tumblr.com/post/695309005156925440/this-is-every-instance-where-the-jedi-talk-about/amp

https://gffa.tumblr.com/post/680367423839485952/this-is-every-time-i-have-ever-seen-george-lucas

https://gffa.tumblr.com/post/685958601260646400/hi-totally-okay-this-ask-was-very-obviously-sent

https://gffa.tumblr.com/post/685727448042733568

https://gffa.tumblr.com/post/682990707642892288/i-never-understand-what-people-mean-when-they-say

…. Honestly just have the entire attachment tag ok:

https://gffa.tumblr.com/tagged/attachment

So. Having done your reading, for the purposes of the GFFA, attachment is greed/possession and *very very bad* for psychic space monks. It is not a thing that the Jedi can just suddenly *allow*. Letting Jedi start allowing attachments, which is the big thing I start seeing whenever people start *reforming* the Jedi is, to me, a Jew who lives in the US South, the equivalent of Jews for Jesus.

Whoa, TSB, you say. You’re going too far.

Not really. Let’s go with a central belief of Judaism. The messiah has not come, Jesus is not the messiah. For the Jedi, attachment is not allowed is one of the central core beliefs. So saying that the way the Jedi need to reform by changing one of their core beliefs hits me like the person who told me “oh honey, we don’t care how you worship, as long as you accept Christ” did. (Right after I was introduced as being Jewish!) If you’re changing the *core* of who the Jedi are, you’re making them no longer Jedi. It’s not just changing one thing, it’s changing *everything.*

And, while the Jedi are much more Buddhist then they are Jewish, they still hit me very much in my Jewish feels. Gee, I wonder *why* I could possibly resonate with a minority religious group who were hunted down and murdered and who get accused of a bunch of anti-semitic tropes including baby stealing and secretly running the government???? There are no parallels, clearly.

So look. Every single time I get hit with a fic that’s tagged Pro-Jedi and then its “we changed our rules about attachment and that stopped us from being murdered” what I hear is “the Jews accepted Jesus so we avoided pogroms/The Holocaust.” Or, as another friend pointed out "the Sikhs cut their hair, converted, and so the Mughal Empire let them live.”

Obviously I don’t speak for every Jew, and I certainly don’t speak for any Sikhs, so not everyone is going to agree with my take. But there are people that relate to Jedi and there is a reason why people are uncomfortable with Jedi reform and allowing attachment.

But if you’re going to write fic about the Prequel Jedi and have them reform, before you tag it pro-Jedi or Jedi-Positive, please consider if “well they have to change who they are to be good” is as positive as you think it is. Tags help people curate their fannish experience. I very much follow the philosophies of YKINMKATO and don’t like, don’t read. The backbutton is my friend! But when I think I’m getting positive fic and then it isn’t? That sucks. Please tag accurately.

…. And well, since I’ve broken my rule about not writing these essays I guess look forward to my future essays of “No the Jedi are not Catholic” and “Actually they don’t have any political power” and “please stop judging the Jedi Order by some middle grade books” and finally “Galidraan was not the Jedi’s fault oh my god Jango shot first” Shana tova, everyone. Let’s try to do better this year.

#pro-Jedi #Stop insisting the Jedi need to reform and tagging it pro-Jedi simultaneously #fandom salt #Write whatever you want but maybe think about it

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oceanblueeyesoul · 1 year

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Heya! It's your fellow mutual, may I request a Cabin matchup and PJO romantic matchup with male and female preference?

𝗦𝗘𝗫𝗨𝗔𝗟𝗜𝗧𝗬/𝗣𝗥𝗢𝗡𝗢𝗨𝗡𝗦: Biromantic Pansexual and Genderfluid; He/They (though I'm biologically woman irl)

𝗔𝗣𝗣𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗔𝗡𝗖𝗘: 21 years old, 5'1.5", Southeast Asian. Chubby with messy shoulder length brunette hair, chocolate brown eyes, and a small beauty mark on my forehead. My style is in between soft grunge and soft punk (not a big fan of dress except for occasions) but loves to wear Korean makeup style

𝗣𝗘𝗥𝗦𝗢𝗡𝗔𝗟𝗜𝗧𝗬: Libra-Scorpio cusp, Muggleborn Ravenclaw with a patronous spirit of Hummingbird, an INFJ, my enneagram is 4w5 and my moral alignment is Neutral Good. I may have a slight introverted tendencies and awkward/anxious nature, I describe myself as fiery, swears like a sailor, confident, jokester, and, passionate. Religious, super talkative, sometimes hyper (because of excitement), giggly (I always laugh/snort for stupid reasons), nerdy, also sweet and nice though I can be aloof, intimidating, and scary when I get so angry. I tend to become really fiesty, stands boldly on what I believe (claiming myself as a realist though some of my views doesn't makes sense), unhinged to be myself, stubborn, young-at-heart, clumsy unfortunate and inattentive. Would don't give af towards the people that I hate, sarcasam and savagery is my main language. But on the other side, I overthink a lot and cry over small things many times which I sound like a drama queen, and a perfectionist that provokes even more, yet recognizes a soft spot for dumb jokes, cheesy pickup lines and prefer people with a good sense of humour who see myself as equal. Chill in academics, but very competitive that manages to the top even for my dreams---I'm very dedicated on what I want for my life, and I display modesty and gracefulness towards some people that deserves respect. One notable feature about her is her multi-potentiality due to being naturally gifted in artistic fields (this includes singing).

𝗟𝗜𝗞𝗘𝗦/𝗜𝗡𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗧𝗦: Arts, choir, poetry, karaoke, literature, history, makeup, beauty pageants, fun/deep/dumb conversations, expanding my knowledge in Christianity, documentaries (about saints), reading interesting stuffs, talking about social issues, and creative writing, chilling both indoors and outdoors

𝗗𝗜𝗦𝗟𝗜𝗞𝗘𝗦: Stereotyping, obligation (without a logical reason), getting excluded, being interrupted, invalidating my feelings, judgemental people, telenovelas, hypocrites, dirty bathrooms, blackout, lightning, firecrackers, toads, snakes, cockroaches, toxic masculinity, misogyny, fake woke individuals, colonial mentality, and absurdly girly things

𝗛𝗢𝗕𝗕𝗜𝗘𝗦: Drawing, singing, dancing when nobody's around (I'm very bad at it), sharing nerdy or opinionated thoughts, walking like a model (if I ever feel so confident), sleeping, listening to music (from rock to kpop), chatting or browsing on social media, watching videos on YouTube, making terrible jokes/puns, watching cartoons, writing, cooking, reading interesting things, and conceptualizing my artworks. I also used to study Italian language a bit

Hi honey! I really hope you like this!

PJO Cabin Matchup

You give me Cabin 7 (Apollo) vibes!

You and your siblings like to write poetry, singing and doing artistic things together as a group!

PJO Matchups

Your PJO soulmates is...

ANNABETH CHASE AND PERCY JACKSON

Both of them would dance with you like nobody would be watching just that they could make you smile and laugh.

The three of you would like to talk about deep/fun/dumb conversations together because the three of you will make each happy by doing that all the whole time.

The three of you would watch cartoons together because they want to feel like little kids again and to see you smile and be happy with each other.

ESFP x INTJ x INFJ soulmates

Gryffindor x Slytherin x Ravenclaw power couple

#pjo cabin matchup #oceanblueeyesoul #matchups #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo matchups #annabeth chase romantic matchup #annabeth chase x reader #percy jackson x reader #percy jackson #annabeth chase

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yourdeepestfathoms · 2 years

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“ask me about my books” Okay, tell us about your books!

BET

(all of the beautiful art featured in this post has been done by the incredibly talented @asocial-nebula!!! love you, Niko 💕💕)

in the ripe year of 2021, i successfully managed to write three (3) books. let me tell you about them!

Hell or High Water is a survival horror-splatterpunk set on a cruise ship. when a group of killers hijack The Grey Palace and strand it out in the middle of the ocean, the peaceful vacation becomes a fight for everyone’s life when the passengers start being slaughtered by mask-wearing people known as the “Intruders.” the story follows fifteen-year-old Violet Nicotero, the illegitimate daughter to a congressman, and her survival on the ship.

this was originally supposed to be my first published book, but i had to reread it so many times that i started to hate it, so to keep me from going insane, i put it to the side for now.

this one features four (4) motherly figures, like five lesbians, a teenage protagonist that wears crocs the WHOLE TIME, and a whole lot of gore!

Servant of Evil is a historical fiction-religious horror tragedy about the Salem Witch Trials! it follows the point of view of Mary Warren, the servant of John and Elizabeth Proctor, and how she helps kickstart the trials and, ultimately, how those trials slowly destroy her mental health and even her sanity.

this book is SUPER BLEAK, and it contains a lot of dark and heavy subjects. i don’t recommend reading it in a bad headspace. it’ll probably make you feel worse. i literally cried uncontrollably at Several Scenes.

however, it is my favorite work writing-wise! i LOVE the way it’s written, and it was overall really fun to work on!

Fog Makes People is a psychological thriller-mystery with horror elements about a fictional town named Lochmere and the fog that haunts the city. people disappear in this fog, but nobody knows why. sixteen-year-old Beatrice “Bee” Lamb is returning to Lochmere for her junior year of high after going to stay with her cousins for the summer. she was the sole survivor of a terrible fire that killed nine other kids…but everyone is sure that it wasn’t the fire that killed them, but rather the thing in the fog. after all, none of the bodies had any burns on them…and that’s IF the bodies were found at all. Bee’s hoping for a normal school year, but she’s instantly met with harassment once she gets back home, as most people are still convinced she’s an arsonist murderer who started the fire at the barn. what’s worse: she’s getting texts from the kids in the fire, kids that she knows are very, very dead, and they’re begging for her help.

my favorite book story-wise! i LOVE all the characters and the lore and the main villain! this one ALSO made me cry uncontrollably.

currently, Servant of Evil is scheduled to be published first! i’m just waiting for the cover to be finished, and then i can format it, and it’ll finally done!

thanks for asking! i LOVE talking about my books!! 💕💕

#ask #writing things #hell or high water #servant of evil #fog makes people

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enchantedlandcoffee · 2 years

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Hi! Call me Aerith, may I join the ask game with the fandom Heartstopper?

𝗦𝗘𝗫𝗨𝗔𝗟𝗜𝗧𝗬/𝗣𝗥𝗢𝗡𝗢𝗨𝗡𝗦: Biromantic Pansexual and Genderfluid; He/They (though I'm biologically woman irl)

𝗔𝗣𝗣𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗔𝗡𝗖𝗘: 20 years old, 5'1", Southeast Asian. Chubby with messy shoulder length brunette hair, chocolate brown eyes, and a small beauty mark on my forehead. My style is in between soft grunge and soft punk (not a big fan of dress except for occasions) but loves to wear Korean makeup style

𝗣𝗘𝗥𝗦𝗢𝗡𝗔𝗟𝗜𝗧𝗬: Muggleborn Ravenclaw with a patronous spirit of Hummingbird, an INFJ (last time I checked at MBTI test), my enneagram is 4w5 and my moral alignment is Neutral Good. I may have a slight introverted tendencies and awkward/anxious nature, I describe myself as fiery, swears like a sailor, confident, jokester, and, passionate. Religious, super talkative, sometimes hyper (because of excitement), giggly (I always laugh/snort for stupid reasons), nerdy, also sweet and nice though I can be aloof, intimidating, and scary when I get so angry. I tend to become really fiesty, stands boldly on what I believe (claiming myself as a realist though some of my views doesn't makes sense), unhinged to be myself, stubborn, young-at-heart, clumsy unfortunate and inattentive. Would don't give af towards the people that I hate, sarcasam and savagery is my main language. But on the other side, I overthink a lot and cry over small things many times which I sound like a drama queen, and a perfectionist that provokes even more, yet recognizes a soft spot for dumb jokes, cheesy pickup lines and prefer people with a good sense of humour who see myself as equal. Chill in academics, but very competitive that manages to the top even for my dreams---I'm very dedicated on what I want for my life, and I display modesty and gracefulness towards some people that deserves respect. One notable feature about her is her multi-potentiality due to being naturally gifted in artistic fields (this includes singing).

𝗜𝗡𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗧𝗦: Arts, choir, poetry, karaoke, literature, history, makeup, beauty pageants, fun/deep/dumb conversations, expanding my knowledge in Christianity, documentaries (about saints), reading interesting stuffs, talking about social issues, and creative writing, chilling both indoors and outdoors.

Thanks for the ask 💞I hope you like it

I think that you would be good friends with Tao, Isaac and Charlie (more Tao than any of the others) and later on Nick when he joins the group. You get on well with the girls once you’re introduced to them through Elle.

You bond with Elle over drawing and Darcy over the singing and dancing. Often times, the group would find you and Isaac in a corner reading or discussing your favourite books.

#heartstopper #sookie's game #sookie celebrates 100 followers

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joy-haver · 2 years

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Marxist Leninists are just like liberals, in that they care far more about optics than they do about ideals, values, goals, or people.

I posted on my Facebook that I really love religion, and a guy said

“Religion is a reactionary force.

Yes people in our class genuinely believe that stuff. But our task is to tell everyone the truth. Playing into religious ideas because that‘s what people already believe is both inauthentic and opportunistic. And it only adds to the confusion.”

And like, there’s many problematic things here. I’m not being inauthentic. I genuinely like religion. I don’t think religion is an inherently reactionary force, and the idea that it is has been used by authoritiarian communists as an excuse to colonize, kill, and assimilate indigenous people and marginalized religious groups.

But the fact that he immediately assumes that I’m being inauthentic and trying to play 4d chess to win over the uneducated masses or something, is just like, exhausting.

That’s the problem with MLs. They think they are the only ones capable of making society better. So they think they have to trick everyone else into following them and giving them power.

For them, It’s not about helping people. It’s not about genuine love for people. It’s not about harm reduction.

In their view, helping people can actually get in the way of the revolution, because it takes away from their leverage to take power.

And like, do you see how fucked up that is?

This is why I say that your revolutionary ideas must come from a love for the oppressed, not a hatred for the oppressor. If you’ve been oppressed by religion, and you act out of hatred for it, you will end up in a position where you are hurting people who are already super marginalized because you have misidentified them as similar to your oppressor

Religion is not the enemy, dogmatism is. Inflexibility in the face of change is. And a dogmatic hatred of religion just serves to recreate the same problems we would seek to fight.

Telling everyone the truth is not mutually exclusive with religion. If you think it is, your living under a delusion.

Religion is not just a “god of the gaps” and “justify whatever we want” machine. Thats a way it can be used, sure, but it’s not at all inherent. that’s just clearly not the case for most people practicing most religions throughout time.

Idk, this is a bit rambly. But the takeaway, especially if you were raised atheist or Christian, is that you have to stop hating religion as a concept.

You can hate what it did to you.

But you can’t just broadly assume every religion is exactly like your specific brand of traumatic religion. And you have to learn about and love other religions. Otherwise you will end up doing the same shit as the people who hurt you, just for different reasons.

#religion #text post #anarchy #anarchism #marxism #anarcho disability #restorative justice #anti colonialism #decolonization

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mythicaldemigoddess-of-deltarune · 1 year

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I Hate Michael Farris’s Anti-LGBTQ+ Group & Pastor Worley

[Note: Reading This Post Is Optional, also Don’t Reblog Without Permission.]

I Deeply Hate Michael Farris And His "Alliance Defending Freedom" if it is true that group is just a Anti-LGBTQ+, then I have a right to hate that group and the man who made that group.

I hate Pastor Worley and he is likely will go to Hell, also there is other ways to reproduce, like having a surrogate for one, one who isn't a dirty shameless toxic-religious jerk.....plus there is adoption as well, couples can do either one or both.

also someone could be Heteroromantic & be Ace and have two Dads who are supportive of their son or daughter being Heteroace. I found out about some super idiot Pastor Worley on Youtube, it's bad enough there is some hyper-h*rny jerks who have a problem with Aces...

also I know there are some Christians who aren’t Toxic-Christian,

but that Pastor is a Toxic-Christian, and he does know that there are some humans in this world who are bi, pan and omni, right...?

even if that video was from a few years ago, that Pastor is still a Toxic-Christian and the woman who defended him is a Toxic-Christian too...

even if I use to go by Christian, and I can still believe in God...

but I view myself as Neo-Spiritual, and I believe in a Goddess now as well.

also as weird as it sounds, I kind of view myself as a Rebel Earth Angel,

but not the same type as those Eon-Boomers...

what I want to Rebel for, is restoring the full balance between the Masculine and Feminine Energies, and the Toxic-Masculine is a bit higher than the Toxic-Feminine, but both still need to be fixed.

and yes I’m calling Lucifer a Eon-Boomer, even his Ficto-Counterparts are Eon-Boomers.

Lucifer from Hazbin Hotel, he is a Eon-Boomer...

Lucifer from the Lucifer Tv Series, he is a Eon-Boomer...

and if that Good Place Tv Series has a Lucifer in it, then he too, is a Eon-Boomer.

heck, I would even call Cain a Eon-Boomer....or would it be Eon-Xennials, while Adam, Eve and Lilith are Eon-Generation X...?

then again, let’s just go with “Eon-Boomers”....

even if Adam may or may not be Cain’s Bio-Dad, he was still his Dad and should of did better to make sure he didn’t succumb to the darkness in his heart.

plus who Cain’s Bio-Dad is suppose to be, can seem really confusing...

like is it Lucifer or Satan, or like Samael...?

do we need to Jerry Springer this situation...

like can you picture them sitting on some chairs with Eve, and a audience doing that “Jerry, Jerry, Jerry!” chant...?

well no matter which one of those guys are Cain’s Bio-Dad, they ain’t the boss of me....even if I am Cain’s descendant, as well as Seth’s descendant...

would that still make those two like both my Grandpas and Grunkles...?

also even if I know it might not be possible, I wouldn’t mind if it turn out I was a descendant of Mary Magdalene, but I would prefer it if Jesus was just a distant cousin....I have my reasons...

yeah, I know Jesus is technically a distant cousin, because we are both descendants of King David....which once again, King David wasn’t 100% a good dad, because of the whole Tamar situation.

and being a descendant of King Solomon is still a blessing to me, not a curse.

it’s all a night party, and the jokes on those still view that whole being a descendant of Solomon and his son Rehoboam as a curse.

and the perfect song to play to that, is the song “The Jokes On You” by Niki Watkins.

also if certain info I had found before turn out to be true....

it would still make me wish I could grab both Jesus and The Antichrist by their ears.....and if Heavenly Father & Earthly Mother allowed it, I would do it...

I mean I had the thought of wanting to punch Mammon in the groin, and that was my first time thinking about doing that to a guy....and I have good reasons to want to punch Mammon in the groin...

also yeah I have bitter feelings to Satan, you know the real one, not the one from some Ficto-Universes...

and like I pointed out before, in one of my past lives, I was used in a ritual, in attic, and I am still not sure if it is the same George, because when I did try to look up some info about a attic and a man named George, who was suppose to be one of my past life self’s Dad, I ended up finding something that has to do with a Ghost named George who I guess lived in a Lady’s Attic and who had choked a guy...

but the chances of them being the same George is very small, plus it could turn out that there were two different Georges in two different attics...

I think that some past life memories wont be a full picture for some, and some can have bad luck way too many times possibly, because in most of their past lives they never reached to 13 years old...which I believe might of happen in most of my past lives, and you be lucky to make it to that age in your current life, and no one should die so young to the point when they become 3 or 4 years old, they get memory triggered and think if they wear a dress they will die like they did in one of their past lives when they were in a hospital and possibly waiting for their baby sibling to be born....I mean if a little kid dies a bit too young and gets reborn, they are possibly going to get the wrong impression and think they will end up the same way like in one of their past lives....

which I think might be the reason why I didn’t want to wear dresses when I was really little, I think it had to do with a past life memory being triggered...

and yeah a part of me hopes some Satanist have some sense not to cross the line, and do those disgusting Satanic Rituals...

Satanist who do that stuff in real life, I call them Toxic-Satanist and they are on the Toxic-Religious list...Toxic-Christians are also on that list...

as well as the one who made me cry and made me feel really bad, who kept misusing the words “may god have mercy on you.” or “may the lord have mercy on you...” I know it was one of those two, but yeah even when I did try to point out that all they were doing was hurting me and making me cry, that Toxic-Religious person was being too stubborn, and might of thought they were “helping” but really, they were doing more harm than good, and well I had to block them over at where it all happen...

and now I can only hope I never run into them here or some other places I go to.

plus I had figured out the way they were using those words, were being misused.....so yeah, even if I told them that, they would likely not listen.

I know that some people in this world can be very passionate when it comes to their beliefs, like in religion for one...

but it might be really important to not go into a Toxic-Religious Zone, because if one does that, they might end up hurting someone’s feelings really badly.

also if that Michael Farris guy does have a problem with Aces, then he just became even more my enemy.

I think it might be while before I flux, and even if I do find myself being sexually attracted to some humans, I still find some of them not being date worthy...

but I rather not try to date, I know I had bad luck before when it came to some online boyfriends, and I rather just stick to husbandos...

plus my whole Aroaceflux and Semi-Virgintiphobia is a separate thing.

and I believe that my panic attack a few years ago, that I had in the car, around 2015, might of had to do with Virgintiphobia.

I don’t like being by myself outside far from home...

I know that I was hyperventilating during that time and I did end up hitting my head on the ceiling of the car as well...

anyway once again, my being Aroaceflux as well as Fictoromantic, is separate from that....

I rather not be touched by Toxic Hyper-H*rny Shisno, I mean they make Tucker from Red Vs Blue seem like a Saint in comparison.

yeah he is a perv, but he kind of funny and cute, and he has that whole cute idiot himbo thing going for him...

and yeah it took me re-watching a episode where he thought he went back in time, to figure out that he is a cute idiot...

so you got your dangerous pervs, and you got your safe pervs.

cause a safe perv wouldn’t cause a possible alternative version of the Apocalypses in another timeline, when he touched someone he shouldn’t of touched.....don’t ask, all I’m gonna say that it could possibly be true, but that timeline was prevented...plus it’s okay that everyone believes about that...

anyway I really am not a fan of that Michael Farris guy or his group...

and I just found out about that Pastor Worley, even if that video was uploaded a few years ago, and I am still not a fan of that man either or the woman who defended him.

and yeah even if some other Earth Angels might not agree with me on this, but I would probably give those two men the double bird, you know flipping the bird at them.....even if before I might of never done that, but some things that can happen to a person, can make them bittersweet....ya know having bittersweet moments.

plus I’m not like the other Earth Angels, I am like the Amethyst and Off-Color of the whole Earth Angels, and I don’t think I mind being a Defective Earth Angel.

I don’t think I would be me, if I weren’t.

I think later, I will watch some Steven Universe, Transformers, RWBY and Red Vs Blue and some other shows and movies.

anyway, it might be possible that if Pastor Worley and Michael Farris are the Toxic Types that take their hate and dislike a bit too far, it is likely possible they will get karma, and who knows, maybe that Pastor Worley already got his karma.....I mean, it is possible. and both he and Michael Farris, can Frag Off...

even though one of the tags is “f*ck off” but I’m using the Cybertronian version of it, so yeah....they can Frag Off...

#my thoughts #talking about feelings #toxic religion #toxic people #f*ck you #groin punch #satanic ritual abuse #f*ck off #mature audiences only #not for kids #don't reblog #do not reblog without permission

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cacodaemonia · 3 years

Note

okay but. when the vast majority of the "antis" are poc asking you to take a moment to consider the often racist tendencies behind your actions, have you considered that you /might/ be in the wrong here?

if you're doubling down on this stance because you feel you've been harassed, there are some really helpful and well worded posts i can send you if you're interested that explain some of the issues facing the tcw fandom at large! as a white person, they've been very helpful showing me some of the harmful aspects of fan engagement that i didn't have the words for

Ah yes, another anon with concrete proof of their claims.

Anyway, this is a good example of a whataboutism, where anon is trying to take my stance that sending death threats to real people over fictional ships is shitty, and turn it into me being racist.

It's a super common tactic in political arguments, and is often successful at burying the original point in layers of other, usually unrelated topics or accusations.

As I've said before, I'm not going to argue or try to change people's minds, because that's an exercise in futility.

The rest of this post, under the cut, is not directed at the fandom police (who, by not just blocking me, show how devoted they are to being angry over harmless internet content), but to others who might be at risk of being manipulated by their gaslighting.

So first, I apparently need to point out that shipping doesn't inherently have anything to do with race or racism. It can, for certain individuals, and there are obviously a plethora of nasty aspects of fandom that are racist and awful. But antis muddy the waters by crying wolf about others enjoying fictional space people who do not in any way represent a real world group and have no equivalent because they're millions of literal clones.

When they make such a fuss about something that is not harming anyone, they drown out the voices of those addressing actual problems. I know of several poc who have been driven out of fandom because they disagreed with the antis and were then shouted down and harassed for not caving to the arbitrary demands (much like religious extremists, who harm others if they don't conform to their religious creed).

As someone who has been heavily involved in political activism (not keyboard activism) for anti-racist causes and various other progressive issues for many years, it's easy to see through the attempts by antis to hide their obsession with policing fandom experiences of others behind the claim of 'speaking for poc.' Elevating the voices of those who have been historically marginalized is extremely important, but when they simply use that as an excuse to be hateful, they're not doing anyone any good.

Ask yourself: by harassing individuals (about whom they truly know nothing) online, how are the antis helping marginalized or disenfranchised groups? If they really wanted to create positive change, they could put their excessive energy toward fighting systemic racism and inequity by holding mass media and lawmakers accountable, rather than bullying fans who have no power and just happen to have slightly different views on fictional characters.

It's a way to get attention and feel powerful, plain and simple. They drag others down in order to feel superior—or whatever motivates people who enjoy harming others, idk.

I'm glad that the internet preserves this stuff, because maybe some antis will look back in a few years, after they've had enough life experience to understand that real world issues aren't black and white and can't be solved by screaming on the internet. Maybe some of them will realize how needlessly cruel they've been, and how much harm they've caused to real people who just want to share something they like with others.

I won't be responding to any other similar asks. I'm on Tumblr to have fun with fandom stuff, not to engage in the dumpster fire that is the real world or listen to poorly constructed arguments for why everything is 'problematic.'

#fandom wank #antis #purity culture #cw: racism #tcw #cw: death threats #i know it's tempting to think you know everything after taking one philosophy course and watching some YouTube explainer videos #but maybe just take a breath

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zodiacrant · 3 years

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What placements would make someone want to argue all the time/go against what other people think, go against the grain, be different etc?

I am not exactly sure whether you’re talking about someone argumentative, rebellious, or just wants to be different for the sake of being different, so I am going to do all three! 😂

Argumentative

Aries Mercury/Mercury in 1st/Aries in 3rd: People with these placements (myself included) argue and bicker all the time. It’s a way of getting the point across. At times, they can come off aggressive and brash while talking. People might hate talking to them because they know that the smallest of differences can turn into an all-out verbal war. In short, they say what they say without realizing how it may come off as abrasive, intimidating or authoritative. It’s all about the tone.

Sagittarius and/or Leo Sun/Mercury/Mars/Dominance: They got something to say and they’re going to say. They have an opinion about everything and everyone regardless of the circumstances. They can come off rude, inappropriate or someone that steps off their boundaries. Although they might not get how it’s not their place to say what they have said, they might stick to complete silence if told so.

Fire Moons: They feel things so powerfully that they can’t express them otherwise. No matter how much they deny it, Fire Moons are super super super suuupppppeeeerrr sensitive to what others say about them. Fire Moons try their best to be in a good mood by making others be in a good mood, so when things don’t work out how they wanted, enter the BF (bitch fit) of life. Try and talk sense to a Fire Moon while they’re freaking out, it will go down like the Titanic.

Mercury/Moon Square Mars: This aspect brings the feeling of frustration and anger. These people are emotionally immature and almost everything comes off as a personal attack. They didn’t get to cross the traffic light in time, it was on purpose, they didn’t get that job, they got a vendetta against them, they were not given enough ketchup, it was a set up. They are quick to go off and don’t allow people to give any negative feedback. It’s hard to communicate with them in full honesty since they only like the good but never the bad. The lesson of the Square here is to pick your battles and be more mindful of yourself.

Sun/Pluto Square MC: These people got an issue with confidence, power, and dominance. They feel the need to be loud and in everyone’s face to be seen or heard. They place their worth on money, material objects and job titles. They will argue to win you up to put the focus back on them, they might even cut you down just so they can be higher. The lesson of the Square here is that confidence and assertiveness are silent but insecurities are loud.

Rebellious

Aquarius in 1st/3rd/4th and/or Uranus in 1st/3rd/11th: These people were meant to stand out. The way they talk, walk, stand, how they dress, what do they talk about, and how they simply go out about their day is unique, to say the least, but that uniqueness comes from a strong sense of self and appreciation for freedom. They’re rebels by default.

Scorpio/Sagittarius in 11th: Here people are rebellious for their authentic self. They’re walking statements, non-conforming, and at times a lone wolf. They stand on their own for themselves and others, when people think of them they only see them not a group, label or a clique.

Gemini in 4th/5th: Being unconventional and eccentric is a different form of rebellion. Being proud of their work, art, and contributions, no matter how out of the norm and underappreciated it is. Truly an oddball.

Aquarius North Node: These people’s life purpose is to rebel, lead and be different. Having Leo in their South Node, they’re comfortable stepping into the limelight but as they realize their true calling is to use that to make people aware and break through the walls.

Earth Moons: I know half of you are right now in shock but the case of the matter is that the Earth element is actually untamable. Because they run with facts and what actually is, many times you find Earth Moons fighting for the right thing and in the name of science. A big part of their rebellious ways is to fight stigmas, misconceptions and void “facts”.

Sagittarius in 1st: People with this rising live life to the fullest. They want to see, feel, and be in every part of the world. Although their rebellion might be viewed to be juvenile, they still dare to live to feel alive.

Sun Square 4th/10th/11th: Rebellion in here is a natural state for these people. They cannot be controlled and won’t take orders. Sun (self) in Square with either the 4th (mother), 10th (father) or 11th (society) had a bad run as a child with these specific groups/people, which ultimately lead to their constant rebelling of anyone and everyone.

Forced difference

Lilith in 3rd/11th: I am not religious but god bless these everyday victims. People with this placement feel victimized by everyone. It is a constant battle between what they think happened and what actually happened. Lilith creates the illusion of people staring at you and living in constant paranoia of who said what and who did what. This makes them drive a wedge between themselves and their peers, cornering themselves, distancing and repeating the phrase “no one understands what I am going through”, creating a reality in which everyone hates them and is against them

Gemini/Aquarius Moon: Told to me by people with this placement that they HATE having a similarity to someone or being compared. I like to call them the mainstream indie group, where alternative is an aesthetic and being weird is a look. I had one Gemini Moon best friend that pretended to be possessed in church, and an Aquarius Moon best friend that learned things, like doing rubrics cubes, just to show off. Fun people but way too forced in proving their “uniqueness”.

Venus in 11th: These are the people who are adored by the masses, and at times for no apparent reason. Ego is prevalent when the planet of love is the house of society. It brings a god complex on to the person and an impeccable ability to find 100 reasons that make them special.

Neptune in 8th: I got two words for you, fake deep.

Pisces in 3rd: They love to lie and make up things about their life. But they’re good at it, they’re convincing. This gives them a sense of power, control, and importance, which in turn leads them to believe that they’re different.

I hope I answered your question, and sorry for replying late.

Hope you guys enjoyed the post. Lova ya 💕

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violets-page · 3 years

Text

Shot Down |R.R.|

MASTERLIST

A/N: This was my first request and I was so excited! Hope you enjoy <3

The 100, Raven x fem reader? If your kay with it maybe where reader and Raven are in a relationship and had an argument but then the Murphy situation happens in the dropship so the reader helps raven out and when shots happen the reader protects Raven?

You loved Raven, truly. In fact, you loved her more than you thought your heart was capable of. But you couldn’t help but feel like she wasn’t really over Finn. You saw the way she looked at him when he and Clarke were together. You saw the pain of losing your first love and the crushing weight of having to watch him happy without her. No matter how many times she smiled and told you she was ‘so over him’ , you couldn't help but notice how her gaze always lingered on him for a second longer.

When Raven crashed to earth only to have her heartbroken you were there to comfort her. Brought together by her tech-savvy ways and your creative ideas the two of you spent countless days together, thinking up and prototyping weapons. And when night time crept up, throwing darkness onto all those below her, She’d creeped into your bed shuffling blankets to make room on your lap for her head. You’d play with her hair and hum her to sleep as she cried on your lap over a boy who didn’t deserve her.

As you two had grown close an unspoken thing rose between you.

Little kisses through the day, always over before you could move towards her. Cuddling into her bed at night, warm bodies pressed against each other as you fell asleep to the lullaby of her beating heart. Makeout sessions in the forest when no one was around but the trees and birds and all of earth's problems melted away when her hands were in your hair and her lips planted on yours.

Raven hadn’t been one much for public PDA and for a while you thought that was just how she was. It never really bothered you, so what if she didn't feel like sharing your intimate moments in front of a group of immature strangers.

That was until Finn approached you and asked if you knew what boy she was seeing.

* * * * * * * *

You rolled your eyes as Finn sauntered toward you.

“Hey.” his voice sounded exhausted. Much like everyone's did nowadays.

His hands were shoved in his pockets and he glanced around as if searching for someone. With all that you knew about Finn, you had never actually spoken to him. In fact, you actively avoided him. Desperate not to give off the impression that you were willing to talk to him you let out a hum of acknowledgment.

“I'm worried about Raven.”

Your eyes shot up to meet him. He had no right to worry about her, anything worry-worthy had been his fault. You bit back all the lectures and insults you'd thought you'd say to him someday, the ones you thought up while wiping tears with your shirt sleeve.

“Why.”

“I heard her talking to Octavia the other day about a guy she was seeing. I don’t think she knew I was there but..” he sighed, his hand going in towards his greasy hair as you tried not to grimace at its look.

“None of the guys here are good for her.”

Yeah, none of the guys.

You shoot him a frown and bit back your laugh. “No, but if she was seeing someone how would I be able to tell?”

“Well, when we were together she was always very affectionate. Holding hands in public and kisses all the time. She’s really big on PDA. Ya know?”

You didn't know.

* * * * * * * *

You held in your emotions for a few days, desperately trying not to let his ridiculous words get to you. But you couldn't help it as you drifted away from Raven. Every time you were together your mind drifted to her and Finn on the ark, holding hands and kissing in the halls where anyone could see. Your mind soaked up awful thoughts until you felt your heart might just explode.

This led to you storming into her tent in a fit of anger. You waved your hands furiously through the air as you told her about the conversation you'd had with Finn.

“I know you're not over Finn, and I know you're just using me to get over him but you don't want him to know about it in case he wants you back. I won't be your safety guard to fall back on until you're ready to get up and walk away!”

“What? That’s not what’s going on at all.”

“Oh yeah, cause it sure as hell seems like every time we’re out you want nothing to do with me. You won't even hold my hand outside this tent much less kiss me.”

“Y/n listen to me!”

“No, I’m so sick of this shit”

You loved her but you weren’t going to sit and watch her fawn over her asshole ex.

When the yelling had gotten too much for you to handle you stormed out of the tent, sweat running down your back from the hot weather and your bubbling anger. You hate how it felt and how it reminded you of stupid Finn and his stupid greasy hair. You remembered a stream you had seen on one of your forest explorations with Raven.

Raven. Raven. Raven.

You hated how even when you were mad and anger flowed through your veins, you couldn’t escape the thoughts of her. You needed to get out.

The stream was probably a 20-minute walk from camp. You knew the woods weren’t safe but you couldn’t stand being cooped up in camp for a second longer. You took one of Ravens’ guns with you, just in case.

When you reached the steam you glanced around before stripping. The woods were hauntingly beautiful, but every time you looked at them all you could see was Raven. Her back pressed against the trees as her fingers weaved knots in your hair. Your fingers slipping under her shirt exploring the curves of her hips. Her lips against yours, silent gasps for air interrupting the rustling of leaves.

You wadded into the water as if it could wash the thoughts from your mind. The water was like ice and only reached enough to go a little over your knees. The light breeze made goosebumps peak from your skin as the water suddenly seemed much warmer. You squatted down, the algae rocks tickling your toes. Splashing your face with the cool water, you scrubbed it, thankful to get rid of the sticky sweat that had built up over the weeks you’d been on earth. You took a deep breath and tried to relax your muscles.

As you sat in the water you thought about everything that’s been going on. More specifically everything going on with Raven. You hadn’t even let Raven explain herself before you stormed out. Your quick temper was always your biggest problem. Hell, it's how you ended up down here in the first palace. Guilt was a sickly feeling, it nestled into your stomach and made you feel like a monster.

Suddenly the woods felt too empty, The river too dirty and everything too loud. You felt loneliness fill your heart, its claws creeping their way up as you choked back sobs. As Raven's face once again visited your memory you decided it was best to get back and apologize before the sun disappeared and sleep took your lover.

As you got closer to camp you took note of the eerie silence, a major contrast from the usual laughs and shouts that filled the camp. Walking in you saw why. Everyone was crowded around the dropship. Most people looked indifferent or only had slight concern etched across their faces. That was until you came across Octavia standing at the front.

She looked as if she would just about pass out. Fear covered her whole face as she tapped her foot impatiently. A walkie-talkie clenched tightly in her hand as her teeth pulled tightly against her bleeding lip.

“What’s going on”

Without her eyes ever leaving the doors of the drop ship she answered you.

“Murphys got Bellamy trapped inside. I- I think he’s going to kill him. Jaspers under the ship trying to get him out.”

You surveyed the crowds trying to find Raven but nowhere was the girl donning the red puffer jacket anywhere to be seen.

“Where's Raven?”

Octavia’s eyes flickered to you for only a moment before returning to the dropship. But with that one look, you knew she didn’t want to tell you.

“Octavia, where is she.” You moved in front of her, blocking her view of the dropship. Annoyance flashed across her features but it quickly vanished.

She sighed “She's under there helping Jasper but-”

That was all you needed to hear before you turned around and headed toward the dropship. Before you could make it two steps Octavia had grabbed your arm and pulled you back. You considered pulling your arm out of hers or even pushing her down so she would let you go. But the girl had a grip like iron and an attitude to match.

“She’s got this. By going in there you could mess up everything. Just trust her. Okay?”

You nodded and stayed put. But her words did nothing to ease the fear that washed over you like a tsunami, drowning you.

A gunshot rang through the air and Octavia’s grip on your arm tightened. One part in an effort to reassure herself and another part to keep you put.

You weren’t super religious but at that moment you begged whoever -if anyone- above to make sure Raven came out of this alive and unharmed.

Minutes seemed like hours until finally a familiar mop of brown hair appeared from beneath the dropship. You felt every muscle in your body relax and the headache that you hadn't even noticed disband.

You shrugged out of Octavia’s grasp and ran to Jasper quickly engulfing him in a hug. His arms hung limp at his sides and you could see his anxiety written across his face. But at least they were okay.

“Oh thank god”

You peered behind him, expecting to see Raven, but no one was there.

As if sensing your unspoken question he spoke,

“She’s still in the dropship. She-”

But you were already gone.

As you squirmed your way through the complicated working of the dropship you spotted the brunette. Your lungs filled with air and the knot in your chest eased. She was okay.

“Raven ..”

She jumped at your sudden appearance and something within the circuit she was working on sparked. She let out a slight scream as the sparks burnt the tips of her fingers.

You both looked up as the noises from above ceased

And then came the gunshots.

After the first one, you dived over her without a second thought, knocking you both to the ground. You heard her head hit the ground with a loud thunk as the air left her lungs. You covered her body with yours tucking your head into her neck as you covered her face with your hands. You breathed in her scent as bullets rained down on you. You could feel her heart's erratic beating against your chest. It felt like forever until they finally stopped.

When they did Raven wasted no time moving you off of her and getting back to the control panel, finishing what she started.

You however couldn’t move.

Damn adrenaline.

You took a few deep breaths and calmed your heart as much as you possibly could. You tightened your muscles in an attempt to sit up, the same way you've sat up your entire life. Except for this time, your muscles wouldn’t tighten. It was as if they had stopped working entirely.

“Raven “ you called out to her. You were terrified, your heartbeat so loudly you could feel it in your eardrums. She was too focused on finishing the control panel to hear you. Finally, she got it, shooting you one of those proud smiles you always loved. It quickly dissolved when she saw the fear on your face as tears streamed down from your eyes.

“I can’t move. Oh god. Oh my god. “ Your tears turned to sobs as your body shook. She was by your side in a second as she quickly took to examining your body.

“I can’t find a wound.”

“Please, please, please Raven.” She had no idea what to do but couldn’t bear to watch you break to pieces in her arms.

Slowly she moved you so you were sitting up, and although it took a while she was able to get you up and onto her back.

A bang sounded from above and the whole room shook. Her hand slipped from its grip on your thigh but she quickly managed to catch it.

She held your legs as you wrapped your arms around her neck. Although your cries were no longer audible she felt you shake against her back as warm tears splashed her shoulder.

Before she even got into the camp she was yelling.

“WHERE'S CLARKE. SOMEBODY GET CLARKE.” the blonde rushed to her side, a sharp intake escaping when she saw you.

“She says she can’t move. Murphy shot her. I couldn’t find the wound but I don’t know.” She tried desperately not to cry.

Not now. Raven thought. Not when she's breaking.

She carried you into the dropship, laying you carefully down on the table. It took a while but Clarke finally made it in to help.

After sanitizing her hands with what was left of the alcohol she looked at Raven. They both knew this wasn’t going to be good.

“I need to get the bullet out. Can you distract her?”

Raven nodded and held your hand tighter. You could feel her warm palm against hers, the only thing keeping you from falling apart in a fit of hysterics. That was about the only thing you could feel. Everything below your chest was dead weight.

“Remember how you thought I wasn’t showing you public affection because I still had feelings for Finn?” Clarke risked a quick glance at the girls before resuming her work.

You felt her fingers enter the wound in your back and let out a scream.

“Is now really the best time to talk about this” you tried to say between screams and grunts. She nodded, a determined look on her face.

“That’s not why.”

“Okay..” you urged her to go on so you could focus on her voice instead of the fingers probing around underneath your skin.

“No one knows that I am ya know,” although she didn't make a show of it you knew Clarke was listening.

“And I guess I was just- am just, afraid of the way people might look at me.” the raw emotion on her face almost made you forget what was happening. Almost.

You screamed again as Clarke’s fingers exited the wound.

“Got it. Now comes the painful part” You looked at her in horror.

She turned your head away so that you were once again looking at Raven. The brunette couldn't hide the horror that flashed across her face at whatever Clarke was doing behind you.

“Trust me, it’s best not to watch this part.”

Raven almost couldn’t handle the look of fear on your face. She wanted to wrap you up in her arms and keep you safe and away from this cruel world. She laced her finger between yours, light kisses against the back of your hand in an attempt to calm your pounding heart and shaky breaths.

Clarke handed her a cloth for you to bite on. It would stop you from breaking your own teeth is what she had said.

Raven squeezed your hand in reassurance and placed a gentle kiss on your head as you let out a ground trembling scream. She felt her heart fall to pieces at the sound. The world around you disappeared as you tried desperately to focus on Raven instead of the hot metal searing your flesh.

And then-

It was over.

You just lay there, studying Raven. Her lower lip was redder than the top one due to her gnawing on it anxiously. Her eyelashes were long and cast delicate shadows across her high cheekbones. Her jawline was sharp and unmoving. Skin pulled tight in a frown of worry. The whole thing had taken a toll on you. But you refused to let yourself fall asleep.

“Raven, I’m so sorry.”

She let out a sad laugh as tears started forming in her eyes

“Never do that again.” She wanted to scream at you. She wanted to hit you and yell at you for being so stupid. For putting her life above yours and trying to be the hero. But she knew you wouldn’t be able to handle that. Not today at least.

Your eyelids were so heavy. You decided you would just close them, not sleep.

As your eyes fluttered closed Raven turned to Clarke.

Is she going to be okay?

“Yes, but…”

“But what”

“She suffered a slight spinal cord injury. I don’t know how bad it is. She might be able to walk again in six months or a year or possibly never.”

As you heard these words your mind drifted as the welcoming arms of sleep embraced you.

As longs as Raven is okay,

I can handle it.

Pt.2

#the 100 x reader #the 100 #the 100 masterlist #the 100 x y/n #raven reyes #raven reyes x reader #reader insert #raven reyes x you #the 100 x you #bellamy blake x reader series #bellamy x reader #bellamy blake x reader #bellamy blake #the 100 octavia #octavia blake #john murphy

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galacticnova3 · 3 years

Text

Ok updating the pinned post because the old version… is old. Oop. Won’t repeat the stuff in my bio so I guess I’ll just… get into this.

•If you’re a terf, exclusionist, LGBTA+ phobic, think queer is a slur/not a valid identity, are racist/sexist, support p*dos/MAPs/proshippers/anti-antis, or are fatphobic, don’t interact. Also, block me. I hate you I am throwing so many rocks at your face and putting tacks in all of your shoes and changing all of your profile pictures everywhere to a picture of a clown because you’re a fucking joke

•I’m an adult, so if you’d prefer not to interact that’s no problem. Similarly if you don’t want me to interact with you, just let me know and I’ll respect that! In either case I would prefer it be mutual, as I don’t like the idea of only having one-sided interaction.

•Feel free to ask me questions whenever! Especially about headcanons or my own characters! Seriously, I love excuses to ramble about them and have trouble sharing otherwise. You can also ask about me and my opinions too, obviously, but I figure that’s not as likely. Please interact I still need enrichment

•Keep in mind that if an ask is super inappropriate(like actual nsfw) or gross, I probably won’t answer it. That being said I would really prefer not to get graphically sexual or otherwise unpleasant asks. There are better places to share that stuff and better people to share it with.

•If you need something tagged, let me know! However, I will not tag things as “q word” “q slur” or similar, because I see queer as an identity and not a slur, and will treat it as such. If you need it tagged for trigger reasons, I’d prefer a catch-all tag be suggested so that queer folks will not get the wrong idea or feel alienated. If you plan to argue with me about it, save us both some time and block me.

•I have multiple roleplay/ask blogs and they are all dead or dangling by a thread, said thread being an anon or two every few weeks. I’d love to revive them someday so if you are curious about them hit me up. I promise they are cool. One even has a canon url of the muse’s name, that’s worth something right? Pleas

•I support the (correct) use of tone tags! Though I don’t often use them on here beyond a small number in tags, I do on Discord, and I also know most of them.

•I have a Discord, by the way, but I’ll really only chat with folks I know.

•Free Palestine. Support for the current actions of Isreal is support for genocide. It will not be tolerated.

More specific/belief-based stuff under the cut. Not really necessary to read for average folks, but may be important to some. Kinda serious subjects.

•I am a Christian, but unlike some who call themselves that I’ve actually read the book. Tldr everyone is deserving of basic respect regardless of who they are, people aren’t inherently good or inherently evil, fuck capitalism, and choose peace until it isn’t an option. Also something something Jesus was a socialist feminist based on his actions and the conservatives who try to tell you otherwise have no idea what they’re actually talking about. Seriously I could go on about that for ages; don’t lump all Christians together with them, it’s not the fault of us decent folks that loud assholes call themselves the same thing despite being entirely different. That being said, while it rarely comes up, let me know if you want religious stuff like that tagged. At most I usually just reblog posts disproving the arguments of Bible thumpers and supporting the folks they try to use religion to justify their baseless hatred of.

•Related to the above, I don’t like when folks say Christians when they mean racists, homophobes, transphobes, etc. They’re not synonyms and that also lets members of those groups who aren’t Christian act like it doesn’t apply to them.

•I respect differing opinions on religion and am not the sort who forces it on others, but I expect my views to be respected in return. Basically I won’t be a dick to you if you don’t like religion, but don’t be a dick to me for being religious or a Christian.

•Kinning is cool, I do it, not going to elaborate beyond confirming this isn’t a joke.

•I do have several triggers and squicks, but don’t want to put them in the open for my own safety. If you really want to know, you can ask me in direct messages or in a non-anonymous ask.

•I do not want to be involved in discourse, please do not try to drag me into it. This can be anything from fandom stuff to issues between friend circles that don’t involve me to politics. I am here for a good time, I have already had my share of discourse that led to me getting death threats and anon hate over a fictional space clown, I don’t need any more.

Since that stuff was kinda heavy, if you read this far, here are some pictures of my cat Trail Mix

I would kill for her

#rambling #about me #about blog #pinned post

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traumacatholic · 3 years

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What advice would you give to a woman who is struggling to find faith?

I was a sick kid growing up. I was told that I should be grateful that god let me survive cancer. As a child it only made me angry with God and want to hate him. For several years I begged him to kill me because no one wanted me anyways. “Friends” actually told me to my face I was unwanted and no one actually liked me. Growing up we never went to any church or practiced anything so I found it easy to become a bitchy atheist. But it left me feeling hallow and nihilistic.

Half way through high school I had a few friends who “came out” as pagan and it gave me this odd hope that maybe I’d found a place that wouldn’t leave me so hallow. But most pagans and witches are very leftist and beastly to anyone who isn’t anti Christianity and conservative values. I even had some people try and convince me that I was “too open and friendly to be conservative” which I found insanely insulting.

I tried joining different online community’s, but because I didn’t want to be a witch or practice magic I was shunned heavily. Told I was fake and a liar. Then trump took office and everything got so much worse. Anyone who held just a few conservative values were banned and harassed, some to the point of being driving off the internet entirely. I couldn’t make friends who didn’t want to control my views and the hallowness became suffocating.

Now I just feel lost and alone. I’ve stopped talking to many people because they feel the need to baby me or make decisions for me because I’m disabled. I hate pants and like long skirts and suddenly those friends questioned me if the love of my life was abusing me. All because I started making my own clothing because I wanted to care on the creative female traditions in my family.

I just feel like I belong no where and that no one genuinely wants me around. My mom told me I was ridiculous for considering going to church to make friends, my darling supports me but had no interest in going because of how nasty his super religious step dad was growing up. I just want the hallowness to not be so suffocating anymore

I'm not very good at articulating myself, so I'm sorry if my response comes off as blunt or rude. It sounds like you're in a place where you feel like you have to have friends and so you're willing to insert yourself in any kind of place that you feel people are going to be. When what you really need to do is take a step back and figure out who you are.

What values do you have? What things genuinely interest you? Do you really feel called to have a relationship with God, or do you feel that going to Church will bring you friendship? On some level, you need to be comfortable with the idea of not having friends because otherwise you risk tearing yourself apart trying to fit into social groups that you don't really belong in.

By this, I mean that you insert yourself into interest groups where you don't actually have an interest in the thing the group is based around. So in your case it sound like you were getting involved in pagan / witchcraft circles without an actual interest in paganism / witchcraft beyond seeing them as social spaces.

Believe me, I've been in that position of trying to force myself to make some kind of friendships because I was really lonely. But trying to force yourself in somewhere can a) be really obvious to other people in those spaces and b) it reinforces those negative feelings of you being unable to fit in. Because you don't actually have shared values or interests with those group members and therefore it can feel really difficult to socialise with them.

Take some time to learn how to be on your own without feeling lonely. Yes as humans we need to socialise, but if we're not socialising in the right way, it can actually have a negative impact on our sense of self and just generally burn us out. Go on dates by yourself to a museum, have a fun night in watching films by yourself and setting up a little den to snuggle in. Or find things that are suitable for your interests and your level of ability as a disabled person.

Then think about what actually interests you, what values you have as a person and how you present those interests and values to other people. When you have an idea of what actual interests and values you have, it can be clearer where you can go to make friends based around those shared interests/values. This can also be a period of discovery! Try getting involved in things you think you might be interested in but you aren't sure. Take up some hobby craft and join groups based around that hobby.

Doing things like this can feel much more natural and a lot more rewarding. Because you're not placing so much pressure on yourself to immediately make friends, and you can actually develop healthier boundaries for friendships. And take a step back and think about your relationship to God. Do you see God as just some 'thing' that you can put up with provided you get some friends out of it? Or do you want an actual relationship with God for who He is?

It's okay to be unsure - you can speak to Him about it. It can feel unnatural at first, but just spend some time being really honest with Him - how you've felt in the past, how you feel now, the difficulties you're struggling with. I found that regularly doing this really helped me to just make sense of my thoughts and not feel them to be so suffocating and scary.

I'm sorry if this isn't quite the answer you were looking for, but I do feel that if you were to try and take a period of self discovery that you will feel a lot more positively about your situation. There are a lot of forums, Discord servers, Facebook groups, and so on based around any kind of conceivable interest. These should hopefully be accessible for you, but try and just play around with these different spaces based around things that you enjoy. Don't go into these groups with the mindset "I must make friends" but with the mindset of further enriching a hobby or interest you have. God bless you

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blessedarethebinarybreakers · 3 years

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Hey! We're protestant so my family doesn't really celebrate Lent. I know you're supposed to like, give up something important to you, but the only things I can give up right now are technology things and then I'll have nothing else to do in quarantine. How do you celebrate Lent?

Hi there! I’m excited to see you’re interested in Lent! (Btw, some Protestant denominations do observe Lent, even while some don’t.) It’s a powerful season of the year in which we reflect on God’s ultimate solidarity with the most disenfranchised of humanity through the Person of God who is Jesus’s ministry, wilderness wandering, and crucifixion. In pondering Jesus’ solidarity, we are moved to gratitude and seeking deeper relationship with God, and also to solidarity with the oppressed ourselves.

Many people do give up something as part of their Lenten observance. It’s supposed to be something you feel is somehow inhibiting your relationship with God (perhaps excess tv time or alcohol), or else something you give up to cultivate compassion for those in the world who are without that thing (such as engaging in healthy forms of fasting; this compassion should eventually lead to action).

(Unfortunately, Lent is sometimes used almost as a “New Year’s Resolutions: Part 2″ instead of a religious observance -- a chance to start up a diet instead of a chance to nourish one’s spiritual life. But at its best, giving up things for Lent follows what I said in the previous paragraph.)

However, Lent is about far more than giving things up. In fact, this year, when so much has already been stripped away because of the pandemic, many Christian leaders are advising not using this Lent to further deprive yourself. In this time that is so full of trauma and worry and isolation, no one should “give up” anything that is helping them get through it!!

So yeah friend, don’t give up the technology that helps you find a little joy in your day, and lets you connect to others in the midst of quarantine. Instead, you might add something on to your life --

an extra moment of meditation or prayer each day;

or picking a spiritual book you’ll read a little bit of each day (or a podcast if you don’t like books; or an online devotional, etc.).

Or you might commit to performing several intentional acts of kindness each week;

or offering money (if you are financially able to) to good causes;

or educating yourself about how to be in solidarity with a marginalized group to which you don’t belong.

You might also commit to finally doing something that you need to do but have been putting off -- such as finally getting a therapist, or finally getting help for a problem you’ve been keeping secret, or finally setting boundaries or letting go of a harmful relationship -- actions that take so much courage, but will help set you free to pursue the abundance that God wills for you.

_____

I offer some suggestions for reading materials and other Lenten resources in this recent post.

I especially recommend the article “The Unintended Consequences of Spiritual Discipline” by Emmy Kegler for commentary on the risks involved in viewing Lent solely as a time for self denial or “giving things up,” especially for particularly vulnerable groups. Please keep in mind that God does not call us into the kind of self-denial that manifests as self-hate or meaningless suffering -- God longs for abundant life for every one of us!! Take care of yourself <3

I’ve read a few good books already in the past couple weeks that would also make good Lenten reading (reading a lot of books is my own commitment this Lent):

The Art of Dying Well by Katy Butler -- argues that to die well we must live well; and we don’t have to let go of any fear of death, but we do have to be willing to accept that death will come one day and let that knowledge motivate us to pursue purpose and community so that we will feel fulfilled at death. Since one important aspect of Lent is memento mori, but this past year we’ve been so inundated with death and grief that being told to fixate even more on our own mortality seems like a cruel joke, this is a particularly good book for this Lent -- because it helps us face the death we’re already surrounded with. It does share some pretty intense hospital death scenes, however, so if that’s not something you’re in a good place to be reading about, you might instead try.... .

Everything Happens for a Reason: And Other Lies I’ve Loved by Kate Bowler -- this book also faces the prospect of death head on, through the point of view of a woman with stage four cancer. Kate Bowler explores where God is (and is not) in the midst of suffering and death; even has a chapter specifically about Lent. And if you aren’t a big book person, Bowler’s podcast Everything Happens is even better than the book! She interviews all sorts of different people about God and suffering. .

Learning to Walk in the Dark by Barbara Brown Taylor is a book that also explores in accessible and warm language what faith can look like in moments when God seems absent. .

The Black Christ by Kelly Brown Douglass (I recommend the 25th Anniversary Edition because I like its introduction but if you can get another version cheaper for free that’s great too) -- a wonderful introduction into Black theologians’ views on Christ as Black, as one who identifies wholly with those who are oppressed by racism but also by other forms of oppression; it’s a fairly quick and easy-to-understand read, so it’s perfect for non-academics who are interested in this topic but struggle with the heavier texts. .

Living Buddha, Living Christ by Thich Nhat Hanh is what I’m working on now and I’m already in love.

Finally, I’m super pumped about this new disability-centered devotional with readings for every Sunday of Lent plus every day of Holy Week (the final week of Lent, leading up to Easter).

Please let me know if you have more questions! I pray you encounter God in life-giving ways this Lenten season <3

#lent #pandemic #covid19 #lent 2021 #oneblogtorulenoneofthem

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tthankstoyou · 3 years

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How does Sam deal with being bisexual and Christian? How does Kurt deal with his boyfriend being Christian?

These kind of conversations are so interesting to me.

Hehe I love this ask a bunch (as someone who’s a lezzer and religious)

I imagine that Sam’s church back in Tennessee was super accepting and didn’t preach anything anti-gay, just based off of how chill he was with Kurt being gay and how he was shocked by how homophobic Finn was being. I think that his church in Lima wasn’t as chill as his in Tennessee, since Quinn and him went to the same church and that girl reeks of queer religious trauma. But I his parents would definitely reiterate to him that no matter what their new church says about LGBTQ+ people, God will love him no matter what. And like maybe it would be hard to find a new church for their denomination since Lima is a pretty small town.

His parents would be very loving and supportive when Sam comes out to them.

And I feel like before Sam came out to himself, he would advocate for gay rights and befriend gay kids who didn’t have many friends at his old school. He’d definitely see Jesus’ love for people different from him and outcasts in society (like prostitutes) and translate that over to his views on the LGBTQ+ community.

I think it would be tougher for Kurt to come to terms with how religious Sam is, since it seems like Kurt has been really hurt by the church. He probably wouldn’t see how Sam can be proudly bisexual with a boyfriend and also be Christian. He would definitely try hard to understand though, maybe he would ask to go along to a few youth group meetings that Sam is apart of. Sam would notice how much Kurt hates it and talk to him after, he’d tell Kurt that he’s touched that he’s putting this much effort in but that Kurt doesn’t need to take part in anything like that for Sam.

What’s important is that despite Kurt’s previous experience with the church, is that he tries hard to respect Sam’s love for God. Although they have differing opinions, they would respect each other. Kurt wouldn’t talk about how he thinks God isn’t real too much in front of Sam, and Sam wouldn’t ask Kurt to go to church with him every Sunday (Although I do imagine Kurt tagging along sometimes when he spends the weekend at Sam’s house and he’s too polite to tell Sam’s parents that he’d rather not go to church with them)

#self projecting onto sam? more likely than you think #jas omg i want to write a religious hevans fic now #fics that deal with religion are like crack to me #asks #jas #hevans #tw religion

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bananonbinary · 3 years

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Would you mind to share your Jonmartin Guys and Dolls AU daydreams?

its deeply silly and borderline cracky, and mostly half formed, but sure lmao

im thinking about jon as sky and martin as [i cant fuckin remember the love interest's name oops], except jon is a bit more of a mix of sky and nathan.

jon is lonely and prickly, and after an argument with tim is all “oh yeah, as if human relationships are sooo difficult, i could have a date if i wanted, maybe i just think its all a waste of time” and tim’s like. “wow okay rude, i could stop this trainwreck, OR i could be petty and let you crash and burn here” so: the Bet is made. if jon can actually take out someone of tim’s choosing and show them a genuinely good time, tim will pay for the Thing jon’s been trying to fund raise for entirely out of his own pocket. actually maybe its not really tim promising the money. i dont want to paint him as the asshole. maybe tim and jon have the argument, and fucking elias just butts in out of nowhere like “lets make this interesting gentlemen” because he’s a Rich Creep like that. also elias is definitely a 1920s gangster because thats fucking hilarious.

martin and jon Do Not like each other. i think martin is trying to save a failing library with a super conservative head or something (his mother perhaps?), because running with the original not-salvation army gives me fucking hives, but i do still like the idea of Religious Trauma!martin and will pepper it into all my ideas. this might be shading a bit into music man also. listen i like cheesey romance musicals dont @ me. jon, sticking with his original premise that romance is for fucking losers, is like “listen i need a date for Reasons you dont need to know, if u go on a date with me i’ll bring in so many new patrons” and martin’s thinking “wow okay this guy is a skeevey as fuck pick up artist but shit i do need the help” so out loud he’s like “i hate this, but fine.”

honestly i dont really have much of the rest of it i just think its fun to think about them going on a date together that they’re both sort of stubbornly committed to hating and then being like,,,,oh,,,,,,he is soft actually,,,,,,,,,,,

they have a surprisingly wonderful date, but then martin finds out about the bet and thinks jon was just putting on a nice act so he could win some money and his first impression of “skeevey pick up artist” was actually correct. (jon definitely forgot about the bet like ten minutes into the date when martin smiled at him)

actually i might steal a bit from Drawn To That Sort Of Library Magic by god_commissioned_me just to say that the thing jon needs money for is something super wholesome and important, like an lgbt+ support group, and that’s also the group he’s planning on bringing to the library, but he just. never fuckin mentions what the group actually is to martin so martin’s assuming its some sketchy group based on that first impression, and then he finds out jon is just a regular dude trying to do a Good thing and has to come to terms with the fact that he’s maybe a lil in love now.

i cannot stress enough that no one is deliberately playing with anyone else’s emotions in this version, all parties view the initial date as a purely transactional thing, the messy feelings just happen afterwards.

#this got so long oh my god #lol i said it was half-formed #its just a soup of cheesy romance tropes cherry-picked from Stories I Like #lady-with-a-deathwish #im absolutely not going to write this if anyone else wants to play in the space go nuts #i changed the wording a lil cause i dont want jon to sound arophobic #the point isnt 'man thinks hes above romance' the point is 'man is transparent about how much he wants romance'#he's lonely bc he also holds friends at arm's length. not bc hes currently single.

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aphroditeslesbian · 3 years

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I was also raised 7th day Adventist and I’m a closeted lesbian. I don’t hate my religion..because I personally didn’t have a bad experience with it in my childhood, but it clashes a lot with my beliefs and well parts of my identity. I’m feeling a bit helpless because this religion has been a big part of my life, a lot of strong women I look up to in my life are sda, and my local sda community is very wholesome. And by now you can sense my reluctance in letting it go. I’ve been coping by thinking I should find a gay-friendly sda church once I move out.. if I ever get married. What’s your journey been like? 🪴

Hey! I don't meet a lot of sda online, it's interesting to hear a different perspective. I'm gonna go into everything, bc my experiences with sda really shaped me, and yeah, it's been a wild, not so fun ride.

Basically I was baptized catholic as an infant, but my family isn't practicing catholic. My mom is very religious, and wanted me to have a good education... In Brazil, we have very poor public education in primary and secondary school, and the best schools are the private ones... Which are also religious schools. So I wound up studying in a sda school from kindergarten to highschool graduation.

So from a young age (4 yo) I was raised on my school's religious beliefs. I was really involved, and my childhood best friend was also sda, she lived a couple floors down from me and we'd hang out often, and her family would bring me to church on Saturdays (there was a sda church across the street from the apartments we lived in). I was the staple Christian child, I prayed every night and every morning, apart from all the prayer at school ofc. At 8yo they did a talk at school about the importance of baptism, and I asked my parents to allow me to be baptized as sda. My mom surprisingly didn't want me to be baptized again, not so young, but my dad said I should do what I wanted, so I was baptized again at the school's church. Literally the school had an auditorium for our weekly religion-related classes, which we called "chapel", and was basically like going to church – but mandatory, as it was during school time. This specific school also had a church built on the side, so yeah.

During my early childhood through preteen years I had no issues with the school's teachings and sda ideology. It was all I had ever known, my family encouraged religion and we'd also sometimes (rarely) go to catholic church. I honestly didn't even realize people could not believe in god until I was 12/13.

I had never really heard much about being gay, or being anti gay during primary school - I may have forgotten having ever heard it from teachers. I only heard about homophobia from peers, and so I knew that being gay was a bad, evil, gross thing.

When I was around 11/12 we moved to a smaller town, and I started at a smaller Adventist school. I was the only one in my small newly found friend group who was baptized, and moving was very traumatic for me, so I started becoming less active in church. I became severely depressed because of the move and other stuff at home, and turned to the internet for a distraction.

I first heard about atheism from a youtuber, and he was known for his controversial takes (he's pretty nasty, it's only gotten worse with time but anyway). I guess a mixture of depression, becoming a teen, having my rebellious phase, I started researching into it.

My religion teacher (we had "religion" classes, but they should really have been called "7th Day Adventism classes") was much harsher than the one I had at my first school. This was around the time that Twilight was a big deal, and I read those books sooo many times for comfort, I got into Harry Potter etc. Not long after I moved to this school, we had a religion class about how Harry Potter was inspired by the devil. My books were often confiscated during class, even if I had already finished my assignments and was reading quietly, even if they were just on my desk. Being super depressed and introverted, with very few friends, books were my refuge. Having the teachers look down on them and literally say they were devilish and evil really started to shift my view of the religion. I knew these were good books, I loved them. So how could they be evil?

I have a very strong memory of praying and praying once and begging Jesus and god to help me, to give me a sign, because I was terrified of losing my religion, of losing god. All I had learned my whole life was that god is good, god is love etc. How come god wasn't helping me, my family, through some of the worst times? How come I was alone?

At around 12/13 my cousin came out to me as bi, and soon after another cousin came out as gay. I barely fully understood what that meant, and the internet was again where I researched about it. I realized I liked girls at the time, but I never understood you could even be married to a woman, as a woman. Even though I knew I liked and was attracted to girls, I never let myself think too much on it. The school was pretty obvious about how marriage is between a man and a woman, our "sex talk" was a class with our religion teacher. Bio talk was split, the boys left the room so we could learn about female anatomy and stuff, and then the boys had the room, etc. Our religious teacher was very adamant about how one shouldn't have sex before marriage, and marriage was between a man and a woman so...

Honestly the basework they laid was to erase homosexuality. I didn't even grasp that I could be anything but attracted to girls, I didn't realize I could do anything about it.

And then in highschool, I guess bc we were old enough, they finally started being outspoken about their hatred of gay people. There would be snide comments from the Portuguese/Lit teacher, a disgusting talk from the History teacher about how gay men's sexual activity leads to anal incontinence, the Religion teacher saying it was wrong, comparing it to criminality, the school's vice principal giving us a lecture and making sure to hammer in the worst thing anyone could turn out to be was homosexual.

At this point I thought I was okay with my same sex attraction, I thought these things weren't getting under my skin. But then I learned about being trans, and I came to the conclusion that since I was into girls, I couldn't be a woman. I identified as trans from around 15-19. That was internalized misogyny and homophobia, that was me actually letting all the snide little comments settle deep in me, and shape who I was.

Anyway, at around 14 I was done. School was teaching us that bastard kids aren't blessed by god (me and my siblings are all "bastards" as my parents were never married). They told us couples who lived together and we're never married were not blessed by god, and implied they were bound to have issues for their sin.

I was a teenager living in a broken home, my father was emotionally abusive to me and my mother, and honestly at the end of the day I had to choose if I wanted to believe in a god who was supposedly love itself, yet didn't protect me and my young siblings and my mom... Or not believe in god at all.

Leaving the church and coming to terms with not believing in god was one of the toughest times in my life. My depression was in the gutter, I was self harming, I was struggling. I remember thinking of my cousins, whom I was very close with growing up, and knowing they were good people, so how could god not love then? I remember thinking of myself, of all I had done for the church, for god, and wondering how could god not accept me.

For me, the church was poison. I only saw hypocrisy, I saw people who judged each other, who cared more about their own concepts of right and wrong than being mindful of others. I saw my teachers who preached being kind, but ridiculed and laughed at other religions and those who believed them. When I was questioning religion, I always had sooo many questions for my religion teacher and so often she just told me that some questions were too big for us to understand, that only god could fully comprehend himself.

I'm proud to have come out the other side, but I won't lie. The community that church represents does seem so lovely and welcoming. I wanted to be a part of something, and church offered that.

But at the end of the day, there's no space for me, a lesbian, in there. They don't believe gay marriage is okay, they don't condone our "lifestyle". They think this is a choice we're making, and a bad one at that.

The childhood friend I mentioned earlier, who I used to go to church with, actually came out as a lesbian a couple years ago as well. Her sda family is giving her a really hard time. She's left the church, last I heard.

Honestly, my advice would be to find other community. Find community with other lesbians, people who can accept you unconditionally, who can offer you support without small print. That's what I'm trying to do.

I personally am against christianity for a lot of other reasons besides my very negative experiences. Maybe that's not you, and in that case I guess finding a church that is LGB friendly can be the answer. I couldn't judge anyone for choosing to stay, because like I said I really understand how nice it can feel, how it's like you belong in this community, how it can feel like the church is family.

But I really suggest deep soulsearching, because in my experience all they ever did for me was suck all my energy, all my devotion, and spit me out when I was never going to be the heterosexual good girl they expected me to be.

Sorry for the super long answer, I hope this helps some? If you wanna talk more in private you can hit me up through DMs, I'm very willing to listen and talk about it.

#anti religion #sda #august rants #homophobia #lesbophobia #misogyny

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