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lillyfics · 4 months

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Soaring through the Skies || Aemond Targaryen x Reader

Summary: The trials and tribulations in the journey of your love with Aemond.

Previous Chapter

TW: swearing, sexual violence, angst, heartbreak, violence, child death, infidelity, death, references to smut

Chapter 5 (WC: 2,944)

Numb. That’s how you feel. You have endured so much pain that now they have all blended into a singular numbness. Your father is dead, and you don’t know how to feel about it. Do you mourn him? Or do you mourn of what’s going to happen now? As much as you want to keep your hopes you now know how the war is going to end, crushing your dreams of escape. But escaping also always came with a dash of uncertainty, didn’t it? At least you have an idea of what it is like on this side. On the other side, your welcome could go either way, especially after the babe. Your father would believe you to be a traitor, or worse he could try to get rid of Aelora.

Guilt floods your mind for demonizing your father, as he had always had your best interests at heart, despite his questionable feelings for your mother. Opposing guilt, doubt makes you question every interaction with your father making you think if you even knew him properly. Once, you thought you were cunning just like your father, but now you know his cruelty knew no bounds, unlike you. You never would have actively wished harm upon a child and thought your father would too, but you were proven wrong.

You mentally scoff, what use is to dissect the thoughts and moves of your father, as he has long departed the world as of now, thanks to your husband. Husband. The very thought sends bitter aftershocks through you. You understand his reasons so for killing your father, and shamefully, you don’t feel as betrayed by this act of his as you anticipated. However, the pain of his other betrayals still thrives in you.

A sudden smack on your chin inflicted by a tiny hand breaks you out of your trance. You look down at the toothless smile of your Aelora. Her eyes glimmer, unknown of the horrors happening around her. And you won’t let her know of it either, doing your best to protect her from the harsh reality. In reality, you are drowning, and no one is here to help you. Not your father. Not Aemond. You are left to drown, as you did betray all of them by not taking any action. Except now, you have to stay afloat. Not for you, but for Aelora.

You quickly swipe the tears away from your face before you play with her so that she could only see the happy version of you, which you have been failing at more and more recently.

You lift her to your eye level and gently nudge her nose with yours.

“Aren’t you my prettiest love? You are, aren’t you?”

You don’t know if she could understand your words, yet her grin grows wider, nonetheless. Unable to control yourself, you lay loud kisses all over her face, making giggles erupt out of her. Her giggles are the loveliest music you will ever hear, and you don’t think you ever want to stop listening to it. But it does come to an end, after you could sense someone entering the chambers. You don’t make yourself welcome the person, as it usually Alicent or the children wanting to spend time with Aelora. However, fate seems to mock you today as you catch sight of the silver hair.

Your eyes are stuck in stalemate with his for a long time, until he eventually sets his sight down lower. On your daughter. Our daughter, you guess.

He tries to move forward, eyes not leaving her,“Love-“

“Don’t”

You move further back, as his every move closer repulses you like oil to water. He looks devastated, almost ashamed at the fact that he is made someone who loved him to feel disgusted by him. The sorry sight of his eyes makes you falter a bit. You loved him. You never wanted him to feel hurt. To know that you have caused him to feel this pain hurts you more than you anticipated. You have missed him. You missed his kisses and his touches. You want to go back, you want to feel those touches again, and it would be so easy to do so as he is within arm’s reach. One single step, and he will know what to do. He always has. But then you remember. His hands were not only yours like you thought they were. They were the witch’s too, weren’t they? And he must have used not only her hands to touch her, you digress, due to her condition. And now your thoughts wander, as you imagine him and her naked, touching each other, caressing each other, and much and much more. Much more that you only thought you were privy too. A stray tear escapes your eye as you close your eyes and clutch your babe.

“Why?”

Aemond just stares at you, unsuccessful at hiding his guilt, unable to answer.

You don’t know what kind of answer you are expecting either. In fact, you don’t even know what you are asking him. Why? Why did he lie to you about the betrothal? Why did he betray you so with another woman? Why did he kill your father? Why did he tell you that he loves you so in the first place if he was never able to fully give you his heart?

“I am sorry.”

You open your eyes. Surprising. You didn’t think he would outright condemn his actions, but this is a start. You think. A start to where, however? You aren’t sure. Your eyes drift to a glint of steel. Dark sister. He catches the drift of your eyes. “I am not apologizing for the killing of your father, and I never will. I know it hurts you, but I did it for Jaehaerys, and any regret I would feel towards this action feels like dishonoring the memory of my nephew. So, I won’t” he said softly but stern at the same time.

“Then what are you apologizing for?” you ask him, tired and aware. He knows that you know. You can see that in his eyes. Then why can’t he open his mouth and just say it. How hard must it be for him to form those words and acknowledge the truth? He had no problem lying to you after all. Does he think that saying it out loud would make it real? Well, he needs to know that it already is real, and that it already has happened, and this conversation just for both of you to take a step to wherever it leads.

“Alys, she-she- “

“Stop stammering and just get to it” you sob, clutching Aelora to your chest.

“It’s just I need her-“

Every word that comes out of his mouth is like a nail to your chest. You have known of this, and you thought these months alone with Aelora would prevent the pain from occurring, but it seem like the wound is reopening instead.

“You needed her?” you screech.

“Alys, she can look into the future, my love, that’s why I have been winning these battles, you must listen to me-“

“Must listen to you! I have listened to enough of your lies, and look how I am. I trusted you, and look where it led me.”

Aelora screamed, sensing your distress, and you immediately loosen your grip to slightly bounce her around. “Shhhh…..my darling, mama’s here…”

Aemond looks at the scene with wonder in his eyes. This sight is like a dream come true to him. You, being a wonderful mother to his child.

You feel his gaze, and felt the immediate need to hide from his eyes.

“Can I hold him?” Aemond asked, hopeful for your compassion.

“No, you cannot hold HER. Were you so besotted by her cunt that you weren’t even remotely aware of what was happening here?”

Aemond was shocked. He expected your wrath and disappointment, but vulgarity? From someone as sweet as you? Safe to say Aemond was bamboozled.

“She is mine too!” Aemond commanded. “Yours? I was the one who carried her, all alone, as a prisoner, while you were cavorting with your whore!”

“ALYS IS NO WHORE-“

“Well she has me fooled” with a hint of sarcasm to your tone.

“AND she’s here, so she needs to be treated with a modicum of respect.” He stills, gauging your response.

“She’s here? In King’s Landing?”

“Yes,” he continues, before you start your questioning, “-she’s here because the war still isn’t over, I still need her-“

“Need her?” you scoff, with thinly veiled rage over your face.

“And she’s pregnant too, I can’t leave her alone, not after this.” Aemond tells you, with displeasure.

At this point, all the fight has left you. You take deep breaths, trying to calm yourself, trying to keep yourself steady for Aelora. Taking advantage of the silence, Aemond moves forward to try to hold Aelora.

“Don’t.”

Aemond stares at you in disbelief. He didn’t expect you to be iron clad.

He pleads,“I just want to hold my child, love, please...”

“You will have a child of your own to hold soon,” you say, voice on the verge of tears, holding Aelora to your chest.

A single stray tear escapes his eye as he stares at the babe in your arms. It hurts, it hurts you to see him like this, you would do anything to see him smile. Does he not understand, that it hurts for you to do this? That it hurts for you to not let him hold Aelora? A year ago, a picture of him holding your daughter would have cured all your ailments. Now, you can’t let that happen. No, not when it is worth your dignity, not when that is all you have you left that is your own. Even Aelora won’t be just yours, you understand, that she will grow up to be a person of her own. But not your dignity. Your dignity is yours, and it might just be the most powerful weapon you will ever yield.

“Can you please leave now, if that is all you have to say?” you ponder weakly.

Aemond is smart warrior, he knows when a battle is lost. Before leaving, he hesitantly questions you. “May I please know her name?”

“Aelora”

Weeks pass by, and Aemond is still trying his best to get in your good graces. But how could he? Not when you know that he is been sharing his bed with her, now that you have barred him from yours. You have barred him from your chambers, and locked yourself up in your chambers, making you a prisoner of your own choice, hence he still hasn’t caught a proper glimpse at your shared daughter.

One night, you finally decide to leave Aelora to your trustable maid, even though it hurts you to do so, to go have dinner with the entire family. According to Alicent, the children miss you and these dinners would help bring a sense of normalcy back. Normalcy? Alicent Hightower is truly delusional, you think. Things cannot go back to how they were. No, you can’t and won’t allow it. Without pretending that a sense of dread looms over you, not that you have to pretend, it seems like betraying the dead ones. Dead ones that you love. Yet, you still dress yourself to as best as you could and head to the dinner, at least for the children. They at least deserve to believe that the world is a better place, at least for a little while longer, even when they already know it isn’t.

You take a seat between Maelor and Alicent, who were already in an enamored conversation. Well, calling it a conversation is unjust, as it is just Alicent agreeing with Maelor’s half statements. Jaehaera, who is seated between her father and Maelor, leans beyond her little brother so she could ask you all about your little babe. Now everyone in the table has your attention, as they are all curious about your Aelora. They know you are a good mother, and that you would take no actions to harm her, yet they still feel like they are restrained from getting to properly know their niece, grand-daughter, great grand-daughter due to your over protectiveness, not that they could particularly blame you. Taking advantage of the opportunity, they slowly get to know more of Aelora through the little tidbits you offer through questioning. While Otto Hightower doesn’t directly question you, you notice that he has ears open towards you. You should have known, he was always to known to favor his daughter, granddaughter, and great granddaughter and would only be looking to do the same with your own daughter. You want to let it happen. You want her to be loved by all, get the most amount of love from everyone around her until she couldn’t anymore. But you of all people should know better than that. Love leads to trust, and only with trust could you ever receive the knife of betrayal. Thus, you restrain access to your Aelora, only allowing them to know her but not the opposite.

And while you were continuing with your conversations, you hear before you the see scrape of the chair across you. Aemond, uncharacteristically late. You didn’t think he would show up, either believing that they didn’t invite him to give you some courtesy or he himself decided not to show up. Yet here is, across you. And there comes the end to all of your conversations about Aelora. You don’t want to, knowing that talking about her is the only peaceful conversation you could have these days, but you don’t want him to know anything about her, as you don’t have any way else to hurt him. While everyone else quickly understood that the conversation has come to an end, Jaehaera, a lovely child she is, still questions you on when Aelora will be able to play with dolls with her. With a warm smile, you assure Jaehaera that Aelora still has to get a bit older to play dolls with her. Maelor, not wanting to be left out, immediately questions whether Aelora would play with him too. And you quench his doubts too, with no other choice. Because, if not conversing with them means you have to take notice of Aemond, the last thing you ever want to do. Aemond however, is desperate to at least meet your eyes with a glance, a privilege you haven’t granted him yet.

However, your time of comfort comes to an end when you notice a dark haired woman takes a seat next to him. Chillness descends upon the dining hall, with mortification in everyone’s eyes, including Aemond’s. Otto’s sternly utters, “Aemond.” While it may seem like a simple statement of his name, everyone in the room knows it is a silent command. A silent command to get the witch out of the room, whether it be for your dignity or due to his piousness to the Seven or just his preference not to dine with a low-born. But a command is a command, one that Aemond would be to follow with no exceptions. Nonetheless, Aemond doesn’t even allow himself the slight twitch of a muscle, shaming not just you but everyone else in the room further. Aemond also found his wish to be granted, but not with a glance he was expecting but with a look of betrayal from you. Not just from you, as everyone else in the dining hall were either giving him looks of disgust, disappointment, or shame. You move to exit the dining hall, as your eyes are now filled with tears threatening to spill. You could hear Aemond gently calling you, but you make no heeds to his pleas, now that you know where you stand in his life.

After your abrupt departure, Alicent takes hold of the children and moves to her chambers to continue with the dinner, but not before uttering a gut-wrenching words to Aemond, “You have disappointed me.” Aegon and Otto quickly finish their dinner, not a single noise escaping their mouths so they could be done with the façade of a dinner, leaving Aemond and Alys to dine alone.

More weeks pass by, and you opt your decision to continue you days with just Aelora, as Aemond is no longer part of your life. It hurts, but you know time will heal it, as it heals all wounds. At least you hope so it would. You want to take your words to Aegon, to convince him to finally leave with your daughter to the Runestone, promising him of no retaliation or rebellion, just living out your days in peace. You feel like a coward, but you know that you have no other choice, revenge will only continue the cycle of violence, and you don’t want any harm to befall on Aelora due to your mistakes. You know the realm will scorn you, including your own siblings. Will you be punished for not mourning, hence failing your duty as a daughter or will you be punished for mourning him, a man history will not look kindly upon? You can’t win either way. However, your plans are thrown into a blender as you realize the war still isn’t over yet, that the Blacks are still retaliating. You learn of this when your doors are suddenly barred shut, unable to hear anything except whispers of chaos outside. Not wanting to take your chances, you take Aelora in your hands and take refugee near the secret passageway in your room, to flea at a moment’s notice.

#aemond targaryen #aemond x reader #aemond x you #hotd #house of the dragon #aemond x oc

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arabellasleopardcoat · 9 months

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Dry-humping with Helaena?

Golden Chains (Helaena Targaryen x Reader)

Summary: Helaena isn't yours, but you are always hers.

Warnings: Angst. Implied sex between Helaena and Aegon, Implied SA? To be safe, smut.

A/N: I love Helaena so much, but this was a hard prompt to write. I hope I did it justice.

Helaena sends for you, unexpectedly. The Princess, your Princess, awaits you in her rooms. It’s late. The Red Keep’s halls are empty, except for the guards who give you cheerful waves.

You like it here. It’s a good job. No one bothers you, and not only do you have food and boarding, but also a small stipend. Your Princess, as kind as she is, sometimes slips you little trinkets. A slice of cake here, an embroidery handkerchief there.

In normal circumstances, you would be elated to see that she is calling you. But this late? It can only mean one thing.

As you open the doors to her bedchambers, you try to remain unmoved. After all, the Prince is still there. He always looks a bit sick when he does. Perhaps it’s regret, or perhaps it’s the fact there is a witness there to see exactly what they have done.

It’s a testament of Aegon’s sadness that he doesn’t even give you a lustful glance. Other times, when you pass him in the corridors, he smirks and makes crude remarks. He knows exactly what goes on between you and his sister wife, and he never fails to ask you to join him in bed, too.

He tries to do right by her, in a twisted way. Despite having plenty of evidence to get you fired and probably executed, Aegon never makes a move to separate you from Helaena. You wonder if he hurts as much as she does. Likely. Knowing Aegon, he is only getting started for the night. His next stop will be the Street of Silk, where he will try to get rid of the memory of his wife at any cost.

You shake your head, trying to vanish those thoughts. Aegon is not your concern. He has the other Prince, and numerous guards for that. Helaena has no one but you. Not even her mother could come and face her, in nights like these.

Why would she, out of all people, force her into this marriage? You doubted Queen Alicent’s marriage was more pleasant. Yet instead of marrying Helaena to someone else, she had tied together two of her children, who were clearly unhappy.

Duty. The death of all love, it seemed. Even the maternal kind.

Helaena looks small, huddled among the bed covers. Her eyes are vacantly staring at the ceiling, arms limp and outstretched at her sides. If it were not for the rapid movement her chest makes as she inhales and exhales, you would think she is a statue.

“Princess, what do you need? Shall I run you a bath?” You keep your voice soft and unhurried, as not to startle her. You do not approach her further.

Helaena lifts her head from the pillow. Her expression is cold. “’Tis the burden of every noblewoman” She had said to you once, as you poured water down her back. “Nothing to be done about it.”

It broke your heart then. It breaks your heart now, that you cannot help her. Baths are a poor consolation for what she has to endure.

You don’t move. Helaena stares.

“Will you come here?” Helaena finally asks, throwing her covers down. She is dressed as always, in a thin sleeping shift, without lace or any of the frills usually added to entice reluctant husbands. You know she has issues with the textures, sometimes. That what to you is a normal touch, to her feels wrong.

You approach her as soon as she bids you. She doesn’t like to wait. Without needing to be told to, you sit on the edge of the bed.

“I need…” The Princess blushes, all sweet. You feel the urge to smile. Even if suffering, she is never less than polite. “Could you? Um. I… I feel… My husband has left me… Unsatisfied again. I need… I’m burning up.”

“Would a cold bath suffice, or do you wish for me to…?” You don’t dare finish the sentence, just as she doesn’t dare fully ask for what she needs. Perhaps, if not spoken aloud, you can pretend the circumstances are different.

“Please?” The Princess asks, looking tearful. You nod, kneeling on the bed.

“Do you want my…"

“Your thigh.”

The unexpected. At last. You pop one of your hips slightly forward, so your knee juts out just so. Helaena smiles between the tears and pulls you into a kiss.

Against her mouth, you breathe heavily. You do not touch her. Not from fear, no. Because on nights like these, she can’t stand anybody’s touch. And you do not mind it.

This arrangement between the two of you had started when you started serving the Targaryens. Young, and of a similar age to Princess Helaena, you had been designated as her maid after the old one got fired. It meant many things, in practice. You had to supervise her children, the sweet young twins. Manage her daily schedule. Make sure her rooms are kept tidy and neat, help her dress. If Princesses were allowed to have a Hand, that would be what you were to Helaena.

At the same time, you knew you were more. You doubted the Lord Hand cared for King Viserys as you did for your Princess. Spending so much time with someone forced you to have opinions on them, and while you knew little of servitude, with the Red Keep being your first job, you knew she was a good mistress.

Helaena was odd. Peculiar. Most maids couldn’t stand her, Queen Alicent had explained, as she gave you the breakdown of your daily duties. Loud noises upset her, the same with certain textures and some foods. Helaena is very picky about what to eat, and she wants everything done in the exact fashion every day. You had thought at first Helaena was a terror, but soon came to realize it was not on a whim. She needed her routines.

That was why visits from her husband were so disruptive and upsetting. Prince Aegon was unpredictable, as many drunks were. Some nights, he would come to her chambers nearly unconscious. Other nights, he would be in a boisterous good mood. Angry, some days. And he took all of those on her.

He was not a good lover, you had heard. Another maid, one in charge of the children, had told you her predecessor had left because the Prince had made advances towards her. Advances so bad, she had to drink moon tea after, supplied by the very hand of the Queen. Aegon was prone to taking women by force, it seemed, because each time he visited Helaena, she crumbled like a house of cards.

You wondered what that must be like. You were uncertain if she felt like she was doing her duty to the realm, or disgusted by the fact that it was her sibling. Her body seemed to respond well to him, so you guessed he had some care for his Lady Wife he didn’t display towards others. Not enough, in your opinion. Because Helaena always felt unsatisfied after.

And as her Hand, it was you who had to fix it. It had started one night, as she had begged you for a cold bath to cool her blood. Despite the strange request, you had obeyed. And as your Princess sat down, shivering and sniffling for the cold water you poured down her back, she had leaned in and kissed you.

One look at those big, pleading blue eyes, and you were a goner. The Faith of the Seven said it was a sin to lay with another woman. Yet, you didn’t agree. You were not a woman of letters, to be able to read the Seven Pointed Star, but how could something that felt so good be a sin? To you, it was another way of serving your lady. And you had heard at the Sept, once, that a servant must love her Queen. What was the harm in loving Helaena a little earlier?

Some nights, Helaena wanted to please you, too. She brought you joy so great it made you scream and cry. What could be closer to the Seven Heavens than this? Your body tensing like the string of a bow under her skillful hands, so used to embroidering and painting. Her hands, her hands, how you loved them. For what they did to you, for what they taught you to do to her. Guiding yours towards her center, as you worshiped the curve of her hips, her breasts, you felt you were kissing the statue of the Mother herself.

But other nights, like these, she couldn’t stand the touch of your hands. It was too much for her and not enough, and she was burning up, mouth parting in the sweetest of ecstasies. Ready for the taking of a man who didn’t care to bring her joy. And hurting. Hurting so much, she had no option but to lick her wounds. She was too proud to do so in front of a servant, a Targaryen despite her sweetness. So she took selfishly from your body, again and again.

Not pleasure. No. It was a cruel, cruel game. She left you all hot and bothered, chasing her joy. Despite it, you loved her like this, too. Taking what she deserved, as the kindest, sweetest Princess of the realm. It made you proud. Here was something Prince Aegon, despite his blood and titles, couldn't give her. You could. You could because your love was not selfish. If she asked, you would break time and time again under her. You would withstand the harshest punishments, if you got her to yourself once more. If it meant not sharing her.

Helaena shifted on the bed, to straddle your thigh. Her nightgown remained in place, as did your dress and apron. Her hands shyly wrapped around your shoulders, eyes fixated on somewhere far away. Never yours.

Her hips rolled against your leg.

“Like this. Oh… Just like this.” In the sweetest, sweetest whisper. You placed a hesitant hand on her waist. Trying to help her hips find a rhythm, but she bated it away, pouting.

Cheeks flushed. A deliciously dark expression. Sinful. So it was that kind of night. She only wanted to take, take, take. Not be given.

Your leg started to cramp. You didn’t dare move. Not when it would mean losing this. The view of your Princess using you as she would any other tool. Taking her pleasure of your body, as her husband had done from hers.

Did it help? You wanted to ask, after these nights. But you never did. Helaena didn’t like talking. She was reserved. Tuned inwards instead of outwards, as your mother used to say. Feelings were a complex topic to her, but again, to whom weren’t?

Other maids said she was weird. Fey when she spoke, unable to look them in the eyes. You guessed they never saw her like this. Glorious. Sweet. The sweetest. There was a reason the realm loved this Princess of yours.

Other nights, when you two were together without Aegon’s shadows, you allowed yourself to dream. Of asking her to run away with you, of being able to call her fully yours. You never asked. You knew her too well. Helaena was a faithful mother and wife, and much too kind. It would destroy her family.

Sometimes, you thought that was not the real reason. You never asked her because you were afraid she wouldn’t understand. You heard once that when birds were raised in cages, and they escaped, they never survived more than a few days. They weren’t used to freedom and once granted, they didn’t know what to do with it. So they withered away.

Her hips stuttered, little punched out sobs becoming harder to contain. You tensed the muscles of your leg, hoping to aid her along. Helaena rutted against you, harder, faster. Mouth sweetly searching yours, kissing your cheek each time she missed. Your hands didn’t move.

Perhaps, in another world, you two could have been together. A world where your love was not forbidden, a world when everyone could love who they pleased. Where you could scream all your joy when Helaena touched you. But as she tensed against you, mouth parting to scream, you had to kiss her to muffle it. This was not that world. It would never be.

#helaena targaryen x reader #helaena targaryen x you #helaena targaryen #aegon x helaena #unfortunately #cristi's bingo #helaena targaryen smut #helaena smut #helaena x reader #house of the dragon fanfic #house of the dragon #helena targaryen #helena targaryen x reader #haelena targaryen #haelena targaryen x reader #a song of ice and fire #asoif fanfic

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dearbraus · 10 months

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On the Phoenix' Perch | Prologue.

D. Ragnvindr.

General Series Warnings: 18+ only minors dni, gn afab reader, historical au, canonical character death, parental loss, grief, angst, familial bonding, ragbros, courtship, class differences, some references to canon typical gender stereotypes, slow burn, eventual smut, several minor side ships, unfinished multi-chapter fic.

Wc. 2.0k

❝For the first time in the five years following his fathers' death, Diluc Ragnvindr returns home. After the terrible affair that had been his seventeenth birthday, Diluc re-enters society and claims his rightful place as the head of his family. Bound by duty and haunted by the ghost of his father, Diluc strives to uphold the Ragnvindr legacy while also navigating the dreaded social season. Vowing to find love and continue the Ragnvindr line, Diluc chases the coattails of the man he thinks his father wished for him to become.

Failed love affairs and blunders drive him right back out of society, but in retracing the footsteps of another lifetime, Diluc might just find what he is looking for❞

[See future updates on ao3 @ dearbraus]

The day Viscount Ragnvindr died was not meant to be a tragic one.

Diluc, the young master and heir to the Ragnvindr clan had just turned seventeen. Though still cherubic and shrouded in the essence of boyhood, Diluc had stepped into society that day. Celebrations of grandeur crept around the corner with each passing day until April thirtieth had finally arrived after an arduous winter, he couldn’t wait to finally relish in the frivolities and luxuries his father saved only for the most special of occasions.

His younger brother, Kaeya had been so excited too. He could hardly sleep and rose before the sun to wish Diluc the happiest of days. Kaeya loved parties, the theatricality of it all but he was only fifteen, still too young to spend more than a few precious moments soaking up the festivities before Adelinde, their governess, helped him to bed. That day though, he was allowed to dance to his heart's content and sip on sweet lemonade until his tongue grew tart.

It was all the two boys could have ever wanted, and their father, Crepus could feel his heart swell thrice its size, adoration and pride filling every fibre of his being. There truly could never be a father quite so proud of his sons in all of Dulcis, so overwrought with love that he’d pluck the sun, the moon, and all of the stars in the sky if they so wished for it.

How unfortunate it was that as the hours bleed late into the night that tragedy would befall the Ragnvindr family. In the span of a few short minutes, Diluc and Kaeya’s world went from that of a dream to a nightmare.

A chill drifted into the ballroom, ice biting through the warmth that collected amongst the throngs of bodies spinning around the room in a waltz. Diluc, ever the dutiful son, slipped between cheerful embraces in search of the miscreant so his father wouldn’t have to but all he found was broken glass and his father's crumpled figure. Silky strands of hair spun by scarlet lay splayed across the carpet, dampened by streaks of metallic crimson. It stained Diluc’s shirt, the new one the modiste embroider as a gift to the family, and seeped into the cream-coloured flowers of his mother's favourite carpet as Diluc gathered Crepus into his arms.

Diluc didn’t realise he had screamed until others came rushing in, a stampede of prying busybodies who traded gossip like children traded marbles. His father's blood bubbled from the gaping wound that tore through his chest, his hands not enough to quell the bleeding no matter how he tried. Tears hot and angry stung his eyes, a frustrated cry clawing at his throat, fervently willing Diluc to feel the anguish that had struck him. But, Diluc felt nothing, too numbed with panic to do anything other than compress the wound, until Kaeya’s desperate plea reached his ears.

It was caught between a haggard breath and a flurry of sniffles, hardly coherent for anyone but Diluc.

He doesn’t remember much from that night, but Diluc remembers how raw his chest felt when he barked out an order for Kaeya, willing him to stay back and close his eyes. Kaeya didn’t need to watch another father die. He had already lost too much at such a young age, his heart would break. Diluc could not bear the thought of it.

That night, minutes before the clock struck midnight, Crepus took his last breath. His two sons' names lingered on his tongue as the light faded from his eyes— his dying breath lost on the eager ears which desperately sought out those last few words.

Diluc was gone the morning after Crepus had been laid to rest, the only evidence of his departure was an empty armoire and Crepus’ timepiece having gone missing. His bedroom in the Aquilae Estate had been largely untouched, to the naked eye it’d have seemed like an ordinary living quarter but the life that had once occupied had been swiftly snuffed out and the servants knew it the moment they had gone to refresh his linens. The young master had deserted his newly acquired postage, swiftly slipping into obscurity.

He was meant to attend the Akademiya, Alicante’s most prestigious post-secondary school, come fall. Elzer, Crepus’ steward, contacted the institute every few weeks in the hopes of hearing any news in regards to Diluc’s welfare but no matter how often the man sent word, he never learned anything more of his status. Until he was slated to begin classes and a notice of prolonged absence was sent to the estate, along with a hefty fine for overdue tuition fees– Kaeya who was still but a boy had to foot the bill now that he had assumed the position of head of the Raginvindr clan. There was no amount of money or tutors or governesses that could have prepared him for losing an entire family for the second time.

Even with Elzer’s guiding hand, Kaeya’s nimble knees buckled beneath the weight of aristocracy. At nights when he felt lost and that familiar feeling of loneliness began to creep in with the self-doubt, all Kaeya could find himself wishing for was his big brother. In his eyes, he knew everything; Diluc was the smartest person Kaeya had ever met, even smarter than their father. But, Diluc was gone. He’d disappeared faster than the moon and the stars did when morning sat on the horizon, though he never reappeared when evening came as they did.

When Diluc did return, Kaeya was nearly a man grown.

Though, society with all its barbs did not see it that way.

Kaeya had been a man since the mere age of fifteen and now, at twenty he was everything that Diluc should have been. College-educated, knowledgeable about the Ragnvindr business, and ready for marriage. Diluc was none of those things, he was no more grown than he had been at eighteen though now he sported reddish stubble on his jaw, his features weathered from whatever travels he embarked on. He looked every bit the man Crepus had been at his age, a ghost occupying a fleshy body. It terrified the staff when he returned one winter's night. The sun had long since been laid to rest and snow fell from the sky in big white clumps. Diluc appeared on the veranda of the Aquilae Estate with nothing but the singular case he had taken within him so long ago.

Anyone could have mistaken him for his father.

But, Crepus too had long since laid to rest and the young master was all that remained of him. The plains of Diluc’s face were but a map of their late master, a mirror image that forced a bleak reminder into their hearts when he stepped through his childhood home for the first time in five years. A stranger now, no longer the joyful young man they knew him to be. He wandered the halls like a well-worn memory that had begun to fray at the edges. Whatever sadness was felt by the servants, was swallowed by a far greater melancholy that tugged at Diluc’s heartstrings like a long-lost melody.

They tugged at Kaeya’s too.

For he too was a stranger in the eyes of a man who was once his brother.

He wore the face of familiarity well, but when Diluc gazed upon his features, ones that he once knew so well, neither man could feel anything but estranged.

Estranged by distance, time, and loss.

It all hung in the air between them, unspoken, neither willing to be the first to bare his soul or tear open the newly healed wounds that throbbed with each passing second.

It would hurt too much, to hash out the feelings both had worked so diligently to bury deep within their souls. They harboured two lifetimes worth of sadness and heartache, and somehow it would hurt even more.

Diluc longed too, though. He longed to pour his heart and every fibre of his being before his brother. To speak the words that he should have long ago, they sat heavily on his chest and danced upon the tip of his tongue, taunting him as his throat swallowed itself up until he choked on his guilt. That’s what kept him truly silent, the guilt of it all. Diluc was selfish, that much he had accepted but to speak it into the air and allow it to settle, he could never do. To admit it, was to admit that he was everything his father had not raised him to be, and to be a disappointment to Crepus was all that he had feared.

So, brothers turned to strangers.

One silent, a frown permanently etched onto his once cherubic features; the other boisterous, he filled the gaps of silence with well-crafted paragraphs that spoke too much but revealed far too little.

It was strangely befitting for the brothers to play such a balancing act. Two sides of the same coin, aching to be melted and returned to the earth once more.

As days turned into weeks, and then months into years, no warmth had yet to fill the hearth of the place they called home. A layer of frost prickled their skin and kept their feet pressed firmly in place so they remained five feet apart, always. Diluc would muse to himself that it was better to keep the distance because the grief might hurt less in the end. How sweet, naiveté could be

It was a tragedy to see all that Kaeya had lost in a matter of minutes.

The relief that should have filled him the moment he saw his brother's face once more did not fill him, instead, it was dread. Dulcis, like all of Alicante, was built around the egos of eldest sons. They may as well have put all the stars and the moon into the night skies with how they were cradled like young gods, always deserving, forever in want. It mattered nought that Kaeya is the son who stayed and strived to carry his father's legacy upon his narrow shoulders despite being no less of an unknowledgeable boy than he had been the night before Crepus died. He knew little of the family business, as a second son there was no need for him to learn more than how to assist his brother's pursuits. A lifetime of lessons was compressed into mere months and as years with no family became more familiar than it was strange, all that Kaeya had built for himself, for the Ragnvindr name, was to be ripped from between his bare fingers.

Diluc was home.

The title of Viscount Ragnvindr was his, Kaeya was simply keeping it warm for the day that Diluc finally felt strong enough to bear the burden that was noble society.

It would have been cruel of Kaeya to resent Diluc for returning home. He spent countless, sleepless nights praying to whomever would listen, to return Diluc home safely, or even for a letter detailing his wellbeing. For years, Kaeya wished for nothing more than to see his brother again, but when he stood before him in an ill-fitting wool coat, Kaeya wished that no one had listened.

Kaeya knew what it made him, an awful brother and an even worse person– but, was it fair? If you’d ask Kaeya while he lay spread bare, chest heaved and sweat dabbled he’d confess that he did not think it was. As much as he loved Diluc, the closet remnant of his own flesh and blood, why should he be so entitled to a title he never longed for? Kaeya did, he spent many balmy summer days dreaming of when the King or Queen would be so gracious as to bestow a title to him.

Lord Alberich sounded divine, far better than sir.

If Kaeya had been a worse man he may have fought it. His fathers raised him to be good and kind. Kaeya could never hurt Diluc, he could not bare for him to feel as hollow as he did. It was the respectable thing to do, to step down as Viscount and shepherd Diluc into society and into the Ragnvindr clan.

It’s what Crepus would have wanted.

#diluc ragnvindr x reader #diluc x reader #diluc smut #diluc ragnvindr smut #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader

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kirisakiss · 10 days

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Their reactions to meeting hikari for the first time! pt. 2

Featuring: The Mukami brothers!

Word count: around 500 words!

CW: fluff :), slight angst? maybe? idk! just fluff! probably OOC again 😞

— Ruki Mukami

Doesn’t recognize her at first. At all.

He’s like, huh?? Another Eve?? What is going on?

Once he figures out who she is he’s the most shocked of them all, he had talked with Karlheinz about her once; and he did let Ruki know about his plan of experimenting with her.

Eventually, Karlheinz did tell him she had failed, so Ruki just assumed that she had died. He never told his brothers any of that, since he already had a bad feeling about the “experiments”.

He’s obviously relieved she isn’t dead, just really confused.

He doesn’t join the hug or cry, but he gives her a short hug after, he’s happy she’s okay.

Also struggles with calling her by her new name, mostly alternates between the two; eventually he gets used to Hikari.

— Kou Mukami

Also doesn’t recognize her at first, he thinks she’s pretty tho, and is like “Have I seen this girl somewhere?”

Once Azusa says her name, he’s like “Lux? You’re alive?” completely shocked

The biggest smile appears on his face and runs to her to hug her, almost tackling her to the ground.

He will cry a little. Of happiness, of course. She was the first person to show him kindness in the orphanage when he tried to take his life, even before Ruki.

“What did you do to your hair? It was so pretty before! ヽ(；▽；)ノ” Hikari laughs awkwardly and just says she wanted a little change.

When she says her name is "Hikari" now, he just quickly switches and calls her "Hika-chan~!"

Sticks all day by her side, leaning on her and just enjoying her presence. Probably the happiest he’s been in a long time genuinely.

— Yuma Mukami

Doesn't recognize her either until Azusa mentions her name.

He's like "Hah?! Lux?!"

He doesn't cry, he's just really shocked about her still being alive.

Also joins the group hug that's created after Azusa, he's smiling wide.

"How the fuck are you still alive?" He's genuinely shocked, he had already assumed she had died a long time ago, none of them genuinely had any idea of what had happened to her.

"You smell different"

He just immediately switches to calling her "Hikari" when she says her new name, no honorifics, just plain Hikari.

He does call her Lux when he's mad tho. This annoys her.

They have a very sibling like dynamic, teasing each other and play fighting a lot.

— Azusa Mukami

He recognizes her immediately :)

Let’s out a soft “Lux?” Which makes his brothers be like “what-”

He’s the second one to go hug her after Kou, doesn’t wait for him to let go of her and just makes it a three-person hug.

Starts sobbing immediately. Doesn’t let go even after Kou does. Clings to her like she will disappear again.

Lots of “I missed you so much” and "don't leave again"

Hikari would probably drop a "you're taller than me now, you've grown so much".

Spends the day clung to her too, either lying on her lap or just leaning on her. She plays with his hair like they used to do as children.

Struggles the most with her new name, she ends up telling him that her old name is okay too, so he just calls her Lux. Sometimes a little "Lux-san" comes out, but she reminds him just Lux is okay.

#𖤐⸝⸝﹕cor cordium #୨୧⸝⸝﹕undead doll #sorry if it’s ooc again 😞#tags ➜#diabolik lovers #diabolik lovers oc #mukami brothers #ruki mukami #kou mukami #yuma mukami #azusa mukami #oc x canon

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hatchetislostpog · 2 years

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A/n: Hot take, but i think stuttering in fanfic is terrible (only when the person is embarrassed/shy) it honestly is v annoying, but I'm being a hypocrite I put stuttering (bc reader is crying and I stutter when I cry so I think its a normal think)

ALSO "The moon is beutiful isnt it?" is a poet way of saying i love you from a translated phrase of Japanese

anyways

TW: DEATH AND KINDA ANGST

I Hear Symphony (Wilburxreader) (Angst!)

Blood drips down my head. Down my arm. Down my leg. Clothing soaked. Ears ringing. Vision blurry. Pain being an invisible phantom taunting me. My legs trip over one another.

"MY L'MANBURG, PHIL! MY UNFINISHED SYMPHONY, FOREVER UNFINISHED! IF I CAN'T HAVE THIS, NO-ONE CAN, PHIL!"

His words sound broken; broken as if someone dropped a mirror.

My pace picks up.

I don't know if I want to punch him for what he did, or kiss him for being alive. He's a terrible man, but he's mine, and I'm his. I wouldn't change it any other way. Although, he's not the man I fell in love with, I love him just the same.

He needs stopped, he's hurt so many people; it feels like my fault. I could've tried harder to help him, I should've pushed, but my efforts failed. If I continued pushing, things would be different.

"Kill me, Phil. Phil, kill me, Phil, kill me! Phil, stab me with the sword, murder me now, kill me! Killza, Killza, do it! Kill me, Phil! Murder me! Look, they all want you to! Do it, Phil! Kill me! Phil, kill me!"

My pain was numbed for a mere moment, so I ran. I got to the entrance to the room...

"I CAN'T YOU'RE MY SON."

The image of Phil holding a sword to Wilbur's chest almost made my own heart stop.

The scenery behind them was a hole blown in the wall; craters scattering the terrain. This used to be my home.

"PHIL KILL ME."

He's going to die. This moment I realized it. If Phil didn't do it... the rest of the SMP would do it.

Memories flashed across my mind knowing it could be my lover's death.

Our encounter.

"Darling~ I know Dream sent you, no need to play any games, give me some information I need and I'll let you go"

"I was told you were a charming man Mr. Soot--was even warned not to give in to your charm--but before I could even say anything, you tied me up and started being a jerk asking for info."

Our confession.

"Hey Will, the moon is beautiful isn't it?"

"I love you too"

Our Future.

"One day we can run off together and live without war. Live in a cottage. Maybe even get a few kids running around, Fundy's always wanted a sister."

"Ha, you wish; I'm sorry to break it to you Mr. Soot, but before we even think about children you need to put a ring on it."

It has come to an end. Our future ended before it began.

"I CAN'T YOUR MY SON."

"DO IT PHIL, DO IT."

That moment was frozen in time, no one moving; only movement is tears starting to fall down my cheeks. I was trying my hardest to at least make a noise. Finally, my voice came through.

"PHIL PLEASE DON'T, WILBUR PLEASE-"

I wasn't even acknowledge before a sword went through one side of Wilbur and came out the other.

Things blurred.

Time stopped.

His body fell to the floor.

"Phil..." he barley heard my voice. He looked me in the eyes and I looked at him in the eyes. Just looking at him makes my rage bubble up, he's gone because of him, because of Philza. "GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE." I wasn't even yelling, my sob that was building up just escape me, escaped in louder than I wanted.

He pulled his hat down to cover his face, and his wings spread out behind him. Then he was gone.

My wounds didn't matter in the moment when I jumped over to Wilbur, his eyes barley fluttering. Both of my hands lift his head and lets them rest on my thighs. One of his hands came to my cheeks.

"I'm sorry love, I'm sorry we can't live in your cottage."

Tears fell freely now, all ending up in his hand, hair, or face.

"P-ple-." I couldn't get a word out, "Wilbur pl-please don't go."

"I love you."

"W-wait for m-me"

His voice got softer, his last moments approach. His cold hand brushed my cheek.

"My love, please sing, it's my last request."

Our song.

"I used to hear a s-simple song."

He continued the song--as always--but in such a soft voice.

"that was before you came along..."

"Now in it's place is something new"

In that moment his eyes closed, and my heart broke.

He wasn't going to finish the song, it was our unfinished symphony.

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fireheartwraith · 2 years

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What happens after the season finale?

Disclaimer: this is all my crack theory, I don't follow any news sites or pages on TOH to avoid spoilers, so I barely know how season 3 is going to work. This isn't a comprehensive take or anything like that, I just think it would be neat if this is how things worked out

Let's be real, Belos will succeed, at least in part. The season is almost over and there still needs a plot for the specials, so my guess is that the CATs sabotage works and the Collector decides to mess with the portal because the Emperor is a little shit, so a few key characters get stuck in the mortal world.

Because I like to suffer, I want the gang to be split up and Hunter to be one of the people stuck in the mortal realm. He ends up finding Camilia who obviously immediately adopts Hunter, so he gets to be a real teen with a caring parental figure for the first time basically ever, and this time he doesn't need to hide from the emperor coven or feel lesser because he can't do magic. And, since he now knows Belos' true identity, he can research him and figure out who he's a clone of. Angst ensues when he inevitabily tries to act like him because he thinks that's what he's supposed to do, but they help him out.

I also think Luz should get stuck in the mortal realm. She has the very real oportunity to simply forget the whole thing ever happened and live a normal life, and her mom might even encourage that in a misguided attempt to protect her forteen year old daughter from the genocidal maniac that wants her dead, but she comes around once she sees how miserable Luz is being stuck here without being able to help her friends. Also Vee needs food. So the four of them start a researching journey trying to figure out how the Wittebanes got to the Demon Realm in the first place and recreate that.

Back in the Boiling Isles, total chaos. Even though the spell failed, it worked for long enough for everyone to realize what the Day of Unity (and Belos) are really about, so now it's time for Revolution!!! Some fanatics or crazies like Odalia remain on Belos' side, so it's open war in the streets and everyone is scared.

In the Owl House, everyone majorly freaking out: not only they are in the midst of a civil war trying to take care of very eager children, they managed to lose two of them. It's guilt fest with the Clawthorne sisters, the Hexside friends are super worried, but the real focus here is on King. In his mind, his worst fear came true, he lost Luz to the Human Realm. People try to cheer him up by saying that Luz didn't abandon him, she just got sucked into an interdimensional portal with no way back! Needless to say it doesn't work. Little guy is really in the dumps.

Until he gets a very special visit in his dreams: during the showdown, the Collector realized that King is a Titan and promises to show him a way to get Luz back as long as they get something in return. What King doesn't know is that, as a Titan, he can make interdimensional portals on his own, so he just sold his (very powerful) soul to an immortal interdimensional being that is chaotic neutral only on good days. Fingers crossed that the power of friendship and found family wins them over and dissuades them from causing chaos on the multiverse just because they're bored lol

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the-heaminator · 2 years

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A badly written pruk au idea bc my mind will not shut up

Alfred and Matt are the children from Arthur's failed marriage with francene, and has been raising the kids by himself for a good 10 years, works two jobs and is rarely ever home, constantly stressed but he really really really loves his children and would do anything for them. The marriage fell apart because Arthur used to get into a lot of trouble back then and she dipped. Realising that he now has 2 kids to feed and take care of, he gets his shit together and actually becomes a halfway decent parent. Even as he is barely there for the two, but when he is he pours out his love to them. And they really love him back, even as he is usually at work.

His mother has disowned him for reasons I'll get into later and kinda has no support network at all, and all the stresses of work, and him forever worrying about his children starts to get to him.

He starts falling into depression, becoming far more desolate which matt notices, and it gets so bad that matt ends up talking to the school nurse that Arthur doesn't seem well, because he knows that Arthur will never get help for himself. A talk happens, shit goes down hard, but the nurse doesn't question Arthur's parenting abilities, because he seems to be pretty good at it. But she does put out that it would be best for his children if he should be around them more, and Arthur begrudgingly agrees he should probably get a friend that can be considered one and not just a distant acquaintance.

Enter in Ludwig, the brother of Gilbert, a sweet, mildly autistic child who is the sweetest and nicest person that Alfred and Matt have ever met and they've been friends for a while, they find him a bit odd, but in childlike purity, they never treat him any different and just they’re homies. They then realise after a conversation that Ludwigs older brother Gilbert is also very lonely, so they introduce Arthur to Gilbert.

At first for playdates that Arthur actually likes, hes rarely there because his shifts are weird like that, but his children really love it, and they love Gil too, Ludwig is just happy that he has friends lmao which is kinda sad.

The kids are happy, but Arthur still isn't doing too good bc legit the only thing that's kept him anchored to this world are his children, and he feels like they're getting away from him but doesn't want to be overbearing. This culminates in one of the few times they go over to Arthur's house to play, as he is actually at home for once, and Gilbert and Arthur having a man to man talk, where Arthur nearly completely breaks down, nearly. But Gilbert still realises that maybe the man needs some help

He keeps getting stressed, and forgetting to eat and sleep, matt and Alfred are concerned as fuck and then he has a fucking stroke because his blood pressure spiralled out of control. Alfred and Matt realise after he’s getting them ready for school and stops being able to control the left side of his body, slurring and all. Schol assemblies have taught them that that is a sign of a stroke, and a very tearful call to the emergency services later and Arthur is in an ambulance headed for the hospital. Gilbert was called to look after the children, and he had to deal with two very tearful children, Ludwig tries to comfort but he’s not the best at it, but he's trying and that's what counts.

And then angst ensues, matt and Alfred are crying bc you know, the guy that's been single handedly raising you for 10 years could possibly die. Gilbert is currently looking after them and Gilbert is very concerned, he knew that Arthur was pushing himself far too hard and having a stroke at the ripe old age of 36 is not good.

Enter in Rhys (Wales) who was also disowned bc theyre both sons of a second marriage with the mother and she hates them. and any small thing and she disowned them. He finally got into contact with arthur after 10 years and found out that he had a fucking stroke, and he rushed to the hospital. There is a whole ass reunion he meets the children, who is waiting outside with Gilbert, who perhaps realised at probably not a very good time.

And then things start to get better

Pruk slowburn starts

And then the last bit is them all on a beach, now they're like 15 now, Arthur is stable and very in love with Gilbert and vice versa and that's it

#pruk #hws england #hws canada #hws prussia #hws germany #tw stroke #no one is having a good time lmao #hws wales #but i have writers block and cant do anything about it #i need to name this au #no one has a good time au

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introspectivememories · 3 years

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booker has never met a person under 30 that hasn't immediately tried to parent. that man sees a young adult in need of help and is immediately like "is anyone gonna be that child's dad?" and doesn't wait for an answer

#booker's identity is so intrinsically tied to being a father that he just immdiately parents anyone he considers a child #also on the angst side he feels like he failed his children so he tries to help any child he comes across #this mf sees any college kid in paris and is immdiately like 'water? food? have you been eating well?'#as a result most of the college kids in paris know that if you need anything old man sebastien will help you #any given saturday book has 15 college kids sleeping their hangovers off #tog #the old guard #sebastien le livre #booker #movie.rambles

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xutokawa · 3 years

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aahh the s/o finding scratch marks is fulfilling my angst needs 😭🤚🏽 could u maybe do one with bokuto & suna 🥺 i love your writing so much!! xx

pairings: suna x reader, bokuto x reader

genre(s): fluff to angst, cheating

warnings: langauge, cheating

wc: 2.3k

» masterlist

a/n: thank you for your support! I tried adding more plot to it this time hehe. breaking bokuto’s heart broke mine bro :( hope you like it! also TYSM GUYS FOR 200 FOLLOWERS FDJSKF i love every single one of yu :D <3 mwah mwah mwah

atsumu and oikawa ver.

osamu and iwazumi ver.

kuroo and sakusa ver.

akaashi and hinata ver.

༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

Suna

“Rin, hand me the soy sauce,” you asked, not looking up from the dish you were stir frying.

“Get it yourself,” Suna teased back. Rolling your eyes, you stuck out your hand. Laughing, Suna came up behind you, placing the bottle of soy sauce in your hands before wrapping his arms around your waist. His hands snuck under your shirt, laying on your bare stomach. You leaned back into his chest, sighing contently. The two of you rarely had time together anymore. While you were burying yourself in your work in hopes for a promotion, Suna was busy with practices that extended throughout the whole day. Both of you were exhausted by the time you came home to your apartment together, unable to muster the energy to do anything except fall asleep in each other’s arms.

“Mmm, you smell good,” Suna said, taking a deep breath into your neck.

“I think that’s the fried rice you’re smelling,” you joked back. Butterflies stormed your stomach as Suna’s hands gently massaged your sides. Even after living with the middle blocker for three years, he never failed to make you feel like a crushing high school student. Suddenly, Suna’s gentle hands grew antsy, teasingly tickling your sides. Jumping, you tell him, “Rin, stop! I’m going to spill something!”

“I think I’ll keep going,” Suna teased back, his hands continuing to tickle you. With one poke to your side, your entire body jerked, causing the soy sauce in your hand to fling into the air, and onto Suna’s shirt.

“Y/n! I really liked this shirt!” Suna whined.

“That’s your fault, baby. I told you to stop,” you shrugged, laughing at his expression.

“Whatever, I’m going to go change,” Suna pouted, turning away.

As you finished cooking, you went into your shared bedroom to tell Suna dinner was ready. You were stopped in your tracks, however, when you saw his changing form. Back to you, long scratch marks ran down the length of his back. Scratches that were not put there by you.

“R-rin, what is this?” You asked, voice beginning to waver.

Suna spun around, eyes wide like a deer caught in headlights.

“Y/n! Why didn’t you knock?” Suna nervously asked, rushing to push his t-shirt over his head, “It’s nothing, babe, just uh, got in a fight!”

“Are you sure it was a fight? Or was it a late night in someone else's bed?” You asked accusingly, brows furrowing. Would your Suna cheat on you? You had felt pretty secure about your relationship before now, never having a reason to doubt your trust in your boyfriend. Yet, you couldn’t find it in yourself to make excuses for the lines raked down his back.

Pain and guilt flashed across Suna’s eyes, and that’s when you knew. You were wrong to believe you gave him everything he needed in a relationship.

“Look, y/n, we can figure this out, just let me-” Suna began.

“Please, stop,” you choked out, eyes welling up with tears. The middle blocker felt his heart shatter watching you back away from him as if he were a plague.

“No, you don’t understand! I can’t lose you like this,” Suna said, walking towards you, wanting nothing more than to pull you in his arms and wipe your tears away. He stopped in his tracks, however, when you flinched away from his touch, hatred flickering in your eyes. At that moment, Suna felt like the scum of the earth.

“Please, get away from me. Get out of this room, get out of this apartment! I don’t need your excuses,” You said, voice raising. When you finally looked up to meet Suna’s eyes, you found nothing but despair and regret.

“No! I won’t leave you, y/n! You don’t understand how much I need-” Suna started.

“Don’t give me that bullshit, Rintarou,” you scoffed. The pain in Suna’s chest grew at the use of his full name.

“I-it’s Rin. You always call me Rin. Please, call me Rin,” Suna pleaded, voice beginning to shake, “Stop distancing yourself from me. I’m your Rin. Please, don’t leave. I’m so sorry, let me make it up to you!”

“You’re a pathetic piece of shit, Rintarou! Cheating on me and then begging for me to stay and forgive you? Tell me, what was your plan? Did you just want a quick fuck one night? Or did you plan to keep cheating on me for the rest of our relationship?” You angrily walked towards him. Suna watched as the love you once held in your eyes for him turned into agony. He felt himself crumple knowing he was the sole cause of your anger and hurt.

“No! It was a mistake! Please, let me make it up to you,” Suna reached for your hands, desperate to have you with him.

“The only mistake that was made here was me trusting you,” You said, spinning around as you headed for the door. Suna physically flinched at your words, hurt and shame flooding his body. Panic filled his mind at the sound of your keys jingling and the sound of you putting on your shoes.

“Wait! Y/n, where are you going? Please don’t leave, it’s not safe for you to go out right now. Just stay and let us talk about it,” Suna pleaded, walking up behind you.

“I’d rather be anywhere but here with you right now,” you coldly replied, reaching out for the door handle. Suna rushed to stop you from turning the knob.

“Please, y/n, I can’t handle you leaving me,” Suna whispered.

“Just leave it, Suna. No amount of begging or love can fix my trust for you,” you replied, back towards his sobbing figure. Suna finally fell to his knees in defeat as you walked out of the apartment, knowing he lost you forever.

༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

Bokuto

“Ugh, I’m so ready to just relax,” you sighed out, dramatically splaying your arms across the center console in your fiancé’s car. A tingle ran up your spine at the sound of Bokuto chuckling from beside you, not taking his eyes off the road. You could never get used to his laugh, no matter how many times you’ve heard it.

“I know, baby. You deserve it,” Bokuto replied, taking one hand off the steering wheel to place on your thigh, giving a light squeeze. The two of you had been insanely busy the month leading up to this trip. From your boss’ unrelenting demands at work to your family’s constant nagging and opinions on your wedding decorations, the two of you just needed to catch a break. So, when Bokuto brought up the idea of a weekend beach trip, you immediately agreed, jumping up and down in excitement.

The beaming sun immediately warmed your skin as you stepped out of the car. Warmth spread through your body as you glanced back at Bokuto as he started pulling out your stuff from the trunk, looking up to flash you his smile you had fallen in love with ages ago.

“You go on ahead and find a spot for us, I’ll follow in a second,” Bokuto called out to you. Giving a thumbs up, you started towards the gleaming ocean, excitement filling your body as you felt the sand beneath your feet. Finally, choosing a spot, you unfolded your beach chair, spreading your towel across the top. A smile settled on your face as you laid down, sunglasses shielding your eyes from the harsh rays. Your eyes drifted closed, the sounds of waves crashing and children giggling putting you in a serene state.

Bokuto chuckled at your appearance before setting up his own beach chair next to you, situating a beach umbrella between the two chairs. He felt his heart speed up as he gazed at your relaxing figure, wanting nothing more than to cover your face in kisses. The spiker felt so much love for you, so he felt nothing but confusion as to how he woke up in another person’s bed two nights ago, naked. His adoration for you was replaced with guilt. Bokuto still hadn’t figured out how to approach the situation, how to tell you without you breaking off the engagement. He wanted nothing more than to watch you walk down the aisle in a few months, than to have children running around the two of you as you prepared dinner, than to grow old with you by his side. Bokuto was still unsure of what happened that night to cause him to slip out of a random person’s apartment in his clothes from the previous night.

The spiker was shook from his thoughts at the sound of your voice.

“Are you going into the water?” you asked, looking up at him.

“Yeah, I think I will just to cool off,” Bokuto replied, pulling his shirt over his head.

“Okay, I’ll join you in a bit, I just want to lay for a little longer,” you replied to him, closing your eyes again.

“Okay, baby. Take your time,” Bokuto said, placing a kiss on your forehead before starting towards the water. You giggled as you watched your fiancé run towards the ocean. Your laughter quickly died, however, once you saw his back.

Your eyes widen with a mixture of shock and confusion, racking your brain for an explanation for the long, red strips that lined your fiance's back, but, no matter how hard you thought, nothing came up. The past month had been too hectic for the two of you to ever get close to intimate. Tears began pricking your eyes as the realization that Bokuto had cheated on you settled in your mind.

Does he know he has scratch marks on his back? Is this his subtle way of telling me he wants to end this? That I wasn’t enough for him?

As soon as Bokuto hit the ocean, the salty water stung his back. His initial confusion as to where the pain came from was quickly replaced with realization. He shot up at the water, turning to watch you get up from your seat.

Maybe they didn’t see, he hoped. His hopes, however, were quickly crushed as his heart dropped to his feet. You began to gather your things, rummaging through Bokuto’s belongings until you found the keys to his car.

Panicking, Bokuto ran out of the ocean as fast as he could, cursing at the water for resisting his movements. He watched helplessly as you began walking back towards the parking lot. You saw. You saw the scratch marks, and now you were leaving Bokuto. The spiker’s worst nightmares were turning into a reality right in front of his eyes.

The dull shouting of your name from down the beach sounded in your ears. You ignored Bokuto’s incessant calls for you, the ache in your heart overpowering every emotion you were feeling.

Bokuto ran through the sand as fast as he could, hoping to catch up to you before you left his life forever. His lungs and legs were screaming, but the pain was nothing compared to the pain of you leaving. Panic rose in his eyes as he watched you get into the driver's seat, starting the engine to his car.

Wiping the tears from your eyes, you took a shaky breath, a weak attempt to try and calm your heart. You looked down at your engagement ring, memories of that night flashing through your mind, forcing another sob to rack your body knowing that your memories now meant nothing. Banging on the car window startled you as you looked up to find a panicked Bokuto. His frantic words were muffled as you watched him desperately attempt to stop you from leaving.

“Please, y/n, roll down the window. Let me explain, please,” Bokuto blabbered, “Y/n, please don’t leave me, you have to let me explain. I love you! I want to marry you, and you only!”

Anger surged through your body as you scoffed at his words. Rage blinded your thoughts at the mention of your impending marriage. How dare he tell you he wants to get married after cheating on you? Your brain didn’t have time to process your movements as you pulled your ring off your left hand. You watched as a glimmer of hope flickered in Bokuto’s eyes as you began to roll down the window, only to have his eyes widen in pain and shock as you handed him your engagement ring.

“You’re really a piece of shit, Bokuto. You know that?” Tears began welling up in the spiker’s eyes as he stared at the piece of metal that laid in his hands.

“No, y/n, please. Give me your hand, please,” Bokuto frantically pleaded, reaching for your hand. The ring in his hand belonged nowhere else except your ring finger.

“Just stop, Bokuto, you’ve already ruined everything,” you scoffed out. As his eyes met yours, he was met with a whirlwind of hurt, shame, and pity. That’s when he realized. To you, he was pathetic. The love and adoration that made your eyes shine brighter than the sun was now replaced with hatred and pain, making them burn greater than the depths of hell.

Bokuto’s heart shattered into pieces knowing you would never love him the same, knowing he broke your trust.

“I-,” Bokuto paused, unsure of what else he could say to get you back.

“I’m sorry, y/n” the man in front of you choked out. Bokuto felt helpless as he watched you roll up your window and drive away from him, leaving him in shattered pieces.

That night, when Bokuto finally returned to his shared apartment, the reality of the situation hit him. The empty aura filling the space that he used to share with you was all it took for Bokuto to fall onto his knees, becoming a shell of his former self. You were gone.

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sukirichi · 3 years

Text

reckless [02.]

With a lackadaisical playboy as your boss, being reckless wasn’t an option. But on the one time you let loose and made mistakes, your life is shattered, and now you’re playing house with your insufferable boss who is the father of your baby.

✘ cw. angst, toxic situations

✘ note. yes, feel free to scream at me in the asks. but like don’t worry, i promise there’s more to come and there’s more to happen! it’s going to get fluffier as we go hehehehe. ALSO, I can’t help but feel that Zayn’s “Let Me” speaks perfectly to CEO playboy Gojo. hmph.

one ✘ two ✘ three

One glance at the tall man beside you, and you would’ve thought he would pass out soon.

Satoru had been endlessly fidgety hours before the appointment. Flicking from music stations to another, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel or sighing at the sight of you calmly watching the city go by in a flash – it was clear he was restless. Judging from the dark circles he tried to conceal under a pair of shades, he probably hadn’t slept much last night as well.

Now that you were both inside the clinical room, with you laying back down on the reclined bed, belly exposed and all for him to marvel at, his knee hadn’t stopped bouncing. “Satoru, calm down. It’s just a doctor’s appointment.”

“Sorry,” he apologized sheepishly, rubbing his sweaty palms on his pants. “I’m just…excited yet nervous, you know? It feels so real now.”

Real didn’t begin to cover it. Although you masked your nervous quite well, you felt your stomach tighten when a woman came in. Her smile was gentle and comforting enough, talking you both through the process and spilling little fun facts about pregnancy. She applied a cool gel over your belly before turning to a screen, where mixed dots and waves of black and white blurred in front of your visions. Your eyes widened in awe, throat dry from the inability to speak. The baby had always felt real, but seeing it with your own two eyes, a small figure barely even a comprehensible shape in the screen, you couldn’t help but tear up a little.

“That’s mine?” Satoru breathed out, absentmindedly looping his hands through yours. It made you stiffen for a quick second, but your attention was quickly pulled back to the sonogram. “We made that?”

Your heart clenched at his words.

He sounded so happy – like all his dreams came true and you’d just given him a gift that was beyond priceless. You supposed it really was; a baby was always a miracle and joy to have, but this child wasn’t made out of love. How could he have so much fondness for something he didn’t want in the first place?

“The baby is perfectly healthy. This pregnancy doesn’t seem like a high-risk one, but it’s too early to tell so we’ll keep checking in on you,” the doctor pushed her glasses back to her nose, the sound of her cool voice pulling you back from a dangerous path of self-doubt and wariness. “Do you guys want to know the gender?”

Glancing at Satoru, you shook your head. It was amusing that you didn’t need to share words before he got the meaning behind one look, and he squeezed your hand as if to say he understood.

“I’d like that to be more of a surprise. Thank you, doctor.”

“Congratulations on being a father, Sir,” she bowed, and it occurred to you just now she was probably a family doctor. Satoru did end up keeping his promise that your pregnancy be kept private for a while. This little detail made you turn to him with shock written all over your face, though his attention was centred in on the swirling monochrome colours on the screen. Whether the doctor noticed the brewing tension between you two or not, you were still gad when they bowed once more to excuse themselves. “I’ll leave you two to talk now.”

The moment she was gone, you sat up and pushed your blouse down. Satoru’s demeanour had changed as well. His smile was wiped from his face, replaced only by a slight downturn of his lips.

Sighing, you swung your legs over the bed, not minding one bit that he was inches away from resting his chin onto your thighs. “Is there something you’re not telling me? You’ve been so worried since we got here.”

Satoru winced.

“Am I that obvious?”

“Even if you aren’t, it’s not that hard to see through you,” you spoke gently, a spirit possessing you because there would’ve been no other logical reason on why you placed a palm over his. Satoru’s hands were warm and large as he cupped your knee, tracing little patterns over your jeans as he kept his gaze lowered to the floor. It was an odd sight to see; that the Gojo Satoru refused to look a woman in the eye. “Tell me. What’s wrong?”

Satoru’s sigh is painfully drawn out, though his chuckles took the brunt.

“I don’t know what to do – how to be a father, I mean. Don’t you ever get worried…that maybe we might fuck up and ruin someone’s life?”

“Hey,” you cupped his cheek, forcing him to look you in the eyes – which you really wished he didn’t, because you’d never seen such azure this up close before. It was no secret that his eyes alone stole the hearts of people, but you had to remind yourself he broke them as well, so that you pulled away right before he got too close for comfort. It wasn’t what he needed anyway. Satoru simply required reassurance, so you opted for an awkward pat on the shoulder. “Weren’t you the one telling me the other day we’ll work it out?”

“Yeah, but…”

“But what?”

“It’s nothing,” he shook his head, a smile lighting up his features once more. “Are you feeling good? There’s someplace I want to take you, as a celebration for our healthy baby.”

You pursed your lips. As much as you appreciated his enthusiasm, this ‘celebration’ didn’t sound like a good idea. You’ve made mistakes before and now you lived the consequence of it; being reckless was outdated. Caution, wariness, and space were the top three perfect recipes for the complete opposite of a disaster.

“I don’t think that’s necessary.”

“Why not?” he challenged, taking your hand in his as he guided you out the clinic. You made no comment on why he led you out the back where he’d parked his car, even going as far to bow for you as he opened your door. “Liven up a little, we got good news today! Plus, we didn’t both take a day for nothing. Come on, you’re going to have fun, I promise you!”

“And where would we go where people won’t recognize you?”

“Somewhere people are too lost in their own world to focus on others,” Satoru announced before sending you a side glance, smooth hands already on their way to rev the engine.

This wouldn’t go down well. Or at least that was what you wanted to believe, because his smile and excitement were too contagious that you couldn’t restrain the smile you wore.

“A carnival? Really? We’re too old for this.”

“We’re never too old for anything,” he insisted, placing his hands on your shoulders as he maneuvered from stall to stall. Everywhere around you, children and people of all ages milled by, laughter and screams that fading into the distance. One survey at the long, endless lines for the rides and crowded spaces, you grimaced, feeling an uncomfortable weight resting on your shoulders that was beyond Satoru’s hands. “Aw, come on, don’t be such a bore. Day offs like these are rare and think about the baby! Don’t you think they would’ve wanted us to get a long?”

“You’re just using the baby as an excuse to have fun.”

Of course he would – Gojo Satoru was like a man-child. Whether it was someone randomly bringing donuts or puppies into the office, he easily lit up like a firework, seemingly finding joy in every little thing. Being stuck in the office and forced to work his ass off under your supervision must’ve taken a toll on him too.

Add on the fact he hadn’t gone out on dates or parties ever since he found out he was going to be a dad, the desperation to go out and do something was written all over his face.

Satoru pouted. “That’s mean. Take that back.”

“No.”

“And I’m the childish one here?” he snickered. You merely rolled your eyes at him and gave in; too much time spent working and not enough time relaxing (not that being a carnival was your definition or relaxation, but alas, Satoru was dragging you around everywhere like always) wouldn’t be good for the baby.

“You see that bear over there? I’m going to win that for you. It could be my first ever present for our baby.”

There was no stopping him. You didn’t want to, either, because you just stood there, arms crossed against your chest as you let him do whatever he pleased. A literal man-child, a youthful soul stuck in an irritatingly attractive man’s body – these were the thoughts that ran through your head while Satoru kept swinging his arm back and forth. He chose a stall where you had to knock down stacks of cans down with one set of three balls, all because he wanted to win a bear. You would really rather go home than watch him fail four times now, but he wasn’t giving up, only flexing his shoulders before gesturing to the young man.

“Hey man, three more balls please.”

Nothing was funny about it at all. Watching your boss fail miserably even after ten tries shouldn’t have been so hilarious, yet sweat was dripping all over his face and his patience was hanging on a loose thread that you were giggling before you knew it.

His usual confident bravado began to tear down bit by bit, his face flushed from the sounds of your teasing.

“Satoru, stop,” you laughed, “We’ve been here for twenty minutes and your wallet might as well be empty! You can just go buy a bear at the mall.”

“You’re too functional. Where would be the meaning behind it if I just bought a random bear?” he huffed, pushing the sleeves of his denim jacket up to his elbows. Determined now more than ever, he even stretched his long arms side to the side with a shake of his hips. You could tell the young man manning the stall was hiding his amusement by whistling to himself, but Satoru really was such a ridiculous sight you couldn’t blame him. “No, I’m going to get that for you, then I’ll brag to my baby how cool their dad was when he knocked those cans down.”

“You mean, if you knock those cans down.”

His shoulders deflated. “Support me a little bit, will you?”

“Hmm, I don’t know, it might just inflate your ego and you’ll be too distracted by yourself to ever actually knock those cans down,” He threw a ball with a force so strong it hit the curtain above the cans, and it bounced back somewhere below the tables. It didn’t even touch the can by a smidge, and you snorted. “See what I mean?”

Expecting that Satoru would take insult to heart (as his ego was easily wounded, this much you knew when he refused to talk to anyone at the office for a whole day because one of his directors forgot his name) you smirked at him, but that smirk immediately dropped when he grinned back at you. He was no longer wimpy like before, an aura of confidence brimming from him. “That’s like the second time you’ve told me I was distracting,” he mused, leaving you baffled because he was right. “On the contrary, I think you’rea lot more distracting, so I take that back. Just stand there and watch me win.”

“Okay,” you drawled out in faux disinterest, thankful for the corny carnival music and chatter from the crowd that he couldn’t hear your poor beating heart.

You were too focused on pretending to be unbothered by him that you failed to see how the cans were knocked down. The counter guy was already picking them up as Satoru pumped his fists in the air, way too much like a child high on sugar.

Was this really the father of your baby?

“I won! I fucking won! That huge brown bear, please!”Satoru’s smile from holding the bear that was half his size couldn’t even compare to the city lights and sparklers. Even his eyes were lit up in joy as he skipped back to you, happily waving the doe-eyed bear in front of you. At your lack of reaction, he sighed before jutting his cheek out to you. “No congratulations kiss?”

“How about a slap?”

“Kinky,” he teased, sending your brain to overheat when he tapped his chin in thought. “Well, you did make my back bleed so I kind of got the idea you’re sort of extreme in bed – ow! Would you please stop hitting me? I just won you a wonderful prize and your first reaction is to hit me! This arm is exhausted from swinging endlessly, you know.”

“Maybe if you aimed better, you wouldn’t have had to exhaust yourself. Like I said, you could’ve just bought a bear,” you scolded, raising your arm threateningly when he opened his mouth again. Idiot. “Give me that.”

Satoru effortlessly swung the bear until it was under your chins, his white lashes ethereal as he peeked at you through them. He was close enough that you could feel the warmth of his breath dusting on your cheeks, that same warmth that had been mixing with yours in a sloppy, heated kiss just weeks ago. “And who said I was letting you carry this?” he taunted, thoroughly enjoying how for once, you weren’t hitting him.“I’m supposed to wave this around proudly then place it in our baby’s room when we get home. Besides, your hand looks heavy already.”

“My hands? Wait, what do you mean our baby’s room?”

At your words and questioning gaze, Satoru did a quick turn, trying to use the bear as a shield.

“Yeah, I forgot to tell you,” he scratched the back of his head awkwardly, “I may or may not have had my parents’ guest room renovated as a baby room, although if you ask me, I think moving somewhere else would be much better. Raising a child in a penthouse doesn’t seem like such a great idea if you ask me,” opening your mouth to scold him, Satoru stopped you by placing a finger on your lips, noses grazing against each other. “Don’t scold me right now; I know that look on your face and I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, okay? We can still decorate it ourselves. I just had the beds removed and the space cleaned out. Now stop over thinking and let me help you with your problem.”

You pushed his face away for the sake of your heart. In fact, you should be paid for your acting skills for looking so unaffected.

“What problem?”

“Your hands look heavy,” he beamed, long fingers looping through yours as he swayed them side to side. “So let me carry it for you.”

“Satoru, I—”

“Don’t get me wrong,” he blinked innocently while surrendering his free hand, “I’m not doing this for you, it’s for the baby. Did you know oxytocin is released and makes you feel good and reduces pain, maybe even stress? We can pump your oxytocin levels through touch. It also lowers your blood pressure, and we want you at your happiest and healthiest for this pregnancy, right?”

“Since when were you an expert on this?”

“Since I found out I’m becoming a dad,” his words struck you speechless, mouth pressed into a flat line as you stared him openly. You hadn’t mean to come off as rude in that moment; you were just trying to gauge the sincerity behind his words, to explore the depth in his eyes, but Satoru must’ve took it wrong as he cleared his throat, “I can let go if you really want me to.”

“N-no! It’s fine…can we move? We’ve been standing here for ten minutes now,” Embarrassed, you pointed to the closest thing in your sight – a photo booth. “How about there? That looks fun.”

Satoru followed where your arm was pointed, laughing when a couple exited the red curtains while giggling amongst themselves. The guy even leaned down to steal a long kiss from his lover, and if you were embarrassed before, you wanted to crawl into a hole and never come back again right now. “You know, if you wanted me to be stuck in a cramped space next to you, you could’ve just said so. I didn’t bring the limo with me, but the Audi could be pretty small for us, I guess…”

You hissed at him in warning, “God, you never shut up do you?”

“It made you smile.”

“I wasn’t smiling!”

“Sure, mommy, whatever you say,” bumping his hip with yours, Satoru led you inside the cube. There were a plethora of filters to choose from; ranging from heart frames and ones that placed shades on your face. Not really thinking of what to pick, you reached out to press the frog hats one, but Satoru was swatting your hands away for the effect with heart emojis everywhere. “This is cute. We can show this to our baby once they’re born.”

“They won’t really know what a Polaroid is, Satoru.”

“It’s still sentimental!�� he grumbled before clicking the camera icon, a huge smile already on his face until he saw you squished on the other side of the booth. Only one side of your ear could be seen, and Satoru furrowed his brows at you. “Come closer, you’ll be cropped from the frame.”

“I don’t want to.”

“Jesus, Y/N, don’t act shy now, I already fucked a baby into you,” mouth falling open at the vulgarity of his words, Satoru took the chance to drag you beside him. “Relax, you’re always so stiff. Our baby might come out frowning if you keep huffing like that.”

“You’re too close for comfort.”

“My apologies, I’ll try not to be included in the photo when you’re the one who suggested this in the first place,” he muttered playfully, booping your nose before he wrapped an arm around your shoulder. He was close, too close, that his musky perfume filled the close space. You wanted to lean closer to his warmth and sturdiness of his broad shoulders; his mere presence bringing about a sense of tranquillity despite your words. You told yourself it shouldn’t be too bad to lean into him for just a little while, absentmindedly following him as he cheers, “Smile!”

One photo turned into two, and Satoru ended up inserting a few more bills into the slot to take more. He tried out as many filters as he wanted, acting as if you two had been long time friends from how easy it was for him to be around you like that.

You supposed it came from his heavy experience with women. You were so unlike; while he was open to touch and didn’t care too much about space, you craved it deliriously.

It was obvious none of this meant anything to Satoru. You were probably just another woman in his life, with the exception that you had a kid, but you couldn’t mean something more. If anything, he treated you more like an old friend than a lover. He’d said it himself before that you weren’t his type and you didn’t mind, so why did it hurt the longer you mulled about it? Sure, you may not be as attractive or luxurious as his previous lovers, but did you really not even have charismatic pull? Is it because you weren’t his type that he was so casual with you, while you on the other hand, felt like you would lose your mind at every little thing he did?

You watched as Satoru pulled out his wallet and kept the Polaroid of you both grinning at the camera, forming a silly heart shape with your hands per his request. It was silly and platonic – yet the gesture confused you to no end.

“Why’d you do that?”

Satoru’s hand paused. “Am I not allowed to…?”

“We’re not lovers. You can’t just put a photo of us in your wallet.”

As if to prove a point, Satoru pulled out more photos of his wallet and showed it to you. There were several more wallet-sized photos, mostly of his white cat with black shades, another of him and his best friend, Shoko, and the last photo was of him skiing. They were all placed in his wallet along with a small, faded out photograph of what seemed to be his parents from the younger days. You couldn’t understand why he was showing you this, much less how patient he was as he smiled softly at you. “It’s memorabilia. I keep photos of everyone I care about everywhere with me,” he said, pocketing his wallet back before gazing up at the night sky. “I like to think we’re friends, at least. We’re definitely not just boss and employee anymore.”

Then what are we?

There were so many things you wanted to ask. You always knew he was always this overly friendly and nice, but what did make you? What did a friend mean to him? Other than Shoko, who was his lesbian friend who was also the company’s resident doctor, you’d never seen him be platonic with another female before.

The realization made your mood drop.

Maybe you were right. He probably didn’t even see you as a woman, but what did it matter? You didn’t like him. You shouldn’tlike him. Even if he had no intentions of wooing you, Gojo Satoru was far too appealing for his own good. Being around him was dangerous for your heart.

“Wanna ride the ferris wheel? The night city always looks beautiful.”

He was just your boss...and you were just a friend. Things were going to be alright as long as no feelings were involved. You survived seven years of working with him with not a single moment where your heart fluttered when he spoke your name; a baby made between you shouldn’t change anything now. At the end of the day, you were both only doing this out of responsibility. Satoru was trying his best to become a supportive co-parent to you, and that was all it ever would be. Strictly business – purely professional – as it always had been and always will be.

Foolish girl, you could hear a voice whisper at the back of your head, don’t get too lost in his eyes.

“Y/N, are you tired? Do you want to go home now? We can just order dinner to be delivered if you’re exhausted,” Satoru tugged at your sleeve to get your attention, and you chuckled awkwardly, not meaning to have spaced out the whole time. Worry was written all over his face from the way his brows dipped, stunning blue eyes darkening like the night sky you both made memories under.

Don’t look at me like that...

“Are you okay? Do you wanna go home?”

“Yeah,” you chirped far too brightly than you would’ve liked. Right now, it was more of a mission of fake it til you make it. You would just have to keep exerting the same amount of effort into making this work for the baby’s sake. And if that meant pushing aside any budding desire for this to last any longer to focus on your ‘friendship’, then you would do it. Taking Satoru’s hand for the first time since the baby ordeal, you flashed him a genuine smile. “The ferris wheel sounds nice. Let’s do some sightseeing before the night ends.”

Neither of you speak inside the cab. Beautiful the night was as the city shone into awakening illumination beneath you, comforting you with the thought that in the grand scheme of it all, you were small. Insignificant. That somehow everything you worried about wouldn’t matter when there was a much bigger world out there, and you were but a fickle dot in the middle of its entirety. But that was you, and Gojo lived in a much different world than you did. For somewhere in the city, you could recognize several of the sky towers, buildings, and establishments owned by his family. He mattered in the grand scheme; you were a small factor in his world.

Glancing back at the man who’d been silent the whole ride, you smiled upon seeing that he was doing the same. Satoru was practically bouncing in his seat as he snapped several photos of the city, mumbling something about he’d never seen this view before.

He was so innocent yet so out there, igniting within you an urge to take care of him and wanting to be taken care of by him.

You’d already accepted that you may just never have him that way. That small, fleeting crush was like a butterfly – pretty look at, but damn near impossible to catch. You’d already stopped crying yourself to sleep over the new changes brought about in your body, that in a few months’ time, you’d look back into everything and see that everything had changed. The mistakes you made that night were still something you regretted because you wished you could’ve done better, but seeing him right in front of you now, there was only gratefulness blooming within. Grateful that he was right by your side, grateful that at least the father of your child was more than capable of giving them a comfortable life, grateful that he didn’t push you away like you expected.

Acting more on impulse than logic, you leaned over to press your lips on his cheek.“Thank you,” you mumbled, eyes closed as you let your lips stay there for a few more seconds.

His skin was warm underneath your touch, and when you opened your eyes, Satoru was gazing up at you with stars twinkling in the vast galaxy he called his eyes. You smiled at his reaction, watching as he reached a palm out to caress that spot your lips had landed.“For what?”

“For everything,” you crumbled,“You’re not a bad person, Satoru, I know that,” with shuddered breaths, tears sprung at the back of your eyes again. “I’m sorry for being so difficult. I just need time to adjust to…well, all of this.” Your voice cracked at the last sentence and you were crying before you knew it, face hidden behind your palms in fear he’d look at you differently. In his eyes, you were always his stoic secretary who didn’t even bat an eye when people gave you backlash after Satoru hired you despite the lack of a college degree.

This all felt new – to cry, to trust, to rely on someone – and there was a flurry of emotions you couldn’t quite place yet.

Scooping you into his arms, Satoru patted your back as your cries grew louder. “Take all the time you need. We don’t have to rush into anything at all.”

In the harsh world of conglomerates where the laws of business blurred thinner and thinner with each day, it was hard to believe that not rushing into anything would be possible. It was always a flurry of hurried phone calls, frantic preparations for emergency meetings, anxiety over presenting new proposals and hoping that your superiors would sign your documents so you could go about your way. Time was as imperative as money was to them, but Satoru had proved he could be beyond that.

From the moment you met him, he never treated time as if it was something that slipped through his fingertips. He enjoyed every second he had of his life, and perhaps that was why you hated him so much in the first place.

You thought he took everything for granted, when in reality, all he did was bask in the little things life offered.

This much, at least, you trusted him with. If he said there would be no need to rush and you could both take it slow, he meant it. Around him, time felt more like a secret whisper than a treasure you both had to seize to protect. The night drifted off until it was already midnight and the crew was ushering all visitors out. You and Satoru made it home safely and quietly, hands linked together as if it was the most natural thing ever. No rush, you kept telling yourself, and you plopped down on the couch heavily as you let your muscles relax from such a long, eventful day.

You stayed there for a solid minute or so when you felt warm hands take your heels off. Opening your eyes, Satoru kneeled before you, his fingers expertly rubbing and pushing against the sore muscles of your feet. “Wh-what are you doing?”

“Your feet must be tired from all that walking,” he mumbled, looking up briefly to meet your eyes and tease your shoulder back. “Lean back for me. I’ll take care of you.”

Judging by the sentiment behind his smile, you figured it wouldn’t be harmful to enjoy this at least once. You’ve never gotten foot massages before but his hands kneading yours felt heavenly. You knew from experience beforehand that Satoru was quite godly when it came to the skills and magic his fingers brought, though this one was on a different level, and you were sinking deeper into the couch from the bliss. He was right; you were tired, and if having your boss massage you like this every night after dragging you wherever he pleased, then you wouldn’t complain.

The ringing of your phone made you sit up abruptly, surprising Satoru whose head you almost knocked into. “Sorry,” you croaked out sheepishly, “It’s my dad. I need to take this.”

“Do you need me to leave you alone?”

“Uh, no, you’re fine.”

Satoru gestured to your foot as you took the call, mouthing, “Should I continue?”

“Yes, please,” you answered back, palm pressed over the mic before you answered. “Hey, Dad!” Your father greeted you back with much enthusiasm, his energy heard even by Satoru who sent you small smiles and curious glances every now and then. A part of you wanted to ask if he was fine kneeling on the floor like that, but his knees were on the fur carpet anyway that it shouldn’t hurt him. He extended your leg and trailed up your calves, pulling a soft moan from you when he kneaded the flesh and rid it of its knots. His ministrations distracted you until you were nodding absentmindedly to your Dad every now and then, not really paying attention to what he was saying.

Then the call ended, and his last words kept ringing back into your head ominously. Satoru took quick notice of this as he tapped your knee, bringing your attention back to him. “Is something wrong? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“I...” you started, helplessly fumbling around Satoru. “My dad is in Tokyo. He said he wants to have dinner with me.”

“You don’t look particularly happy about that. Do you not want to meet your father?”

“I do but...”

“But?”

“I have to tell him about this,” you shivered, refracting your legs back to the couch until his touch disappeared from your skin. For a moment, you had the urge to crawl back to his heat, but you were restless, agitated. “About us. He’s going to want to meet you and I don’t want to hide the pregnancy from him either,” Satoru remained unmoving as you rambled, and you hid your face behind your arms again as you remembered the rules you asked him to follow. “Listen, I’m sorry if I sound unfair right now, I know I said I didn’t want anyone else knowing—”

Warm lips brushed over your knuckles, large hands peeling your wrists to reveal your face. “Hey, it’s fine. He’s family and you can tell him. It’s not like your Dad would ruin your image or something like you expected to happen.”

“He won’t but...” you frowned, “My dad isn’t going to like this. I can’t guarantee he’ll be civil the whole time, especially towards you.”

“You told him about me?”

“A few years ago, yeah, when I still couldn’t tolerate you.”

“So you can tolerate me now?”

“Only a little bit,” you corrected, pushing his hands away as you opened your phone to check your schedule. It was mostly Satoru’s schedule, truth be told, but you were free for the most part tomorrow. Satoru could just longue back in his office while you clocked out early to meet your dad. “You don’t have to go if you don’t want to. On second thought, he doesn’t have to know at all. I’m only a few weeks in and it’s not like he’ll notice—”

“Y/N,” Satoru interrupted you, rudely snatching his phone from your shaking fingers. You would’ve scolded him had he not sounded so worried. “I did promise I would take responsibility for you, right? I want to meet your dad and introduce myself properly. As a father-to-be, I think I can somewhat understand that he might react strongly to this, but I also need to reassure him you’re in safe hands,” taking your hand in his, Satoru leaned into your palm, the smile he wore way too charming than what your heart could handle. “As long as you’re okay with it, I would like to meet him.”

“I’m sorry if he does something stupid.”

“Don’t be,” he reassured with a chuckle. “I’m sure everything will go well.”

It didn’t go well. Your father wasn’t throwing a fit or causing a scene like you originally feared, but the current situation wasn’t any better either. He looked like he was on the verge of tearing Satoru’s head apart, his grip on the bread knife so tight his knuckles flashed white. Your father was the literal definition of unpredictable and out of nervousness, you held Satoru’s hand under the table for comfort.

In complete opposition of yours, Satoru handled it with class and composure. His head was ducked down in respect, making sure to be curt and precise in counters to your father’s harsh accusations.

“I’m really sorry for everything, Sir.”

“Did you ruin my daughter’s life?”

Satoru finally tilted his head back up to look your father in the eye, both your hands turning cold and sweaty in between the seats. “Pardon?”

“I asked if you ruined my daughter’s life by getting her pregnant.”

“I would never intend for that to happen, Sir,” Satoru straightened up. From your perspective, he looked every bit the man parents would want their children to be with – handsome, elegant, educated, polite, respectful and well-off – but your father was no ordinary parent. He sized Satoru up like a predator hunting his prey even as the latter acted cool about it. “Granted, it was an accident and neither of us are prepared for this, but I promise I’ll take care of her. I take responsibility as the father and you have nothing to worry about.”

Your dad slammed his palms down on the table, the loud smack catching the attention of nearby tables. “How dare you tell me I have nothing to worry about?”

“Dad, please don’t do this.”

“No, he needs to know,” he snapped. Unable to help it, you groaned inwardly and scooted closer to Satoru, knowing where this was leading. “I lost her mother right after she was born; raised her by myself when I was barely out from high school. Rich men like you may never understand the struggles of taking care of a baby all by yourself, but I did everything I could to make sure she grew up well. My daughter had a happy, comfortable life. When she told me she wanted to follow her dreams in Tokyo, I supported her, and then you go take everything away from her because you couldn’t keep your hands to yourself? You dare defile her like that?”

“Dad!” you roared, clutching Satoru’s hand who’d gone limp. “It was equally my responsibility as it is his! I wanted this; we both got carried away but we’re doing our best, so please stop being difficult to us.”

“You wanted this?” he laughed dryly, “A child with this man you kept moaning to me about; the same man who went to clubs every night while he left you all by yourself to work, to clean up his mess from him? You wanted him?”

“Dad,” you gritted your teeth, nails sinking down onto your thigh. Satoru remained silent between you both, although you could feel his burning gaze penetrating through the back of your skull. “It’s both our mistake. But this child...we don’t see it as that. We like to view it as a blessing. It may be true we harbour no affection for one another, but we want to be good parents. That’s all you need to know and I find no reason to explain myself to you. If you have nothing else to say, you can go back home. I’ll pay for your ride,” slamming down a few bills his way, you glared at your father, who shrunk back at the anger radiating off of you. “You’re not welcome here, Dad. Just go back home.”

“I’m just worried for you.”

“You don’t have to. I’m not a little kid anymore.”

“I never said you were,” he sighed, rubbing the sides of his temples. “But he just took all your opportunities away from you! What about your dreams? What about your plan of having your own career once you have enough experience? What about—”

“Are you implying that because I’m pregnant, suddenly I’m not qualified to fulfil my goals?”

“Sir,” Satoru cut you off, releasing your hands as he leaned forwards on the table, becoming more and more like the CEO he was trained to be – all authority and gentle command that won the hearts of multiple investors. “I assure you that I won’t be holding your daughter back from the things she wants to achieve. As her co-parent, I’m perfectly capable of supporting her in the dreams she wishes to achieve. I’ve worked with her for years; I know she can reach for the stars if she wanted.”

Your mind blanked.

“Young man, don’t talk to me as if you know my daughter better than I do,” your father scorned, “I’m not questioning your capability to support her, but what about your credibility? How can you assure me you’ll really be there for her? How can you assure me you won’t leave my daughter stranded in the middle of nowhere? How can you assure me you can protect her from the harsh criticism of society? Money can’t provide nor does it solve anything,” your father copied his gesture by leaning forward, but it was to poke Satoru’s chest. “From what I’ve heard about you, I suppose you understand perfectly well why I don’t trust you.”

“Sir, I do plan on marrying your daughter and to give her the life she deserves,” Satoru confessed, effectively stealing from you the ability to speak as he glimpsed your way. “If she lets me.”

“You’ll marry her? Be faithful to her as your wife and have a family? Are you sure you can do that?”

“Yes, Sir, I’m highly confident I can. I’ll make sure of it.”

“Then that’s all I need to know,” your father leaned back in your seat, arms crossed against his chest and a stern expression on his face. “And if I find out you hurt or make my daughter cry in any way, I’ll beat up that pretty face of yours. I have two more sons that’re willing to do the same, if you don’t watch your actions.”

Satoru beamed at your father’s ‘approval.’ “I’ll face any consequence if I fall short on my duties, Sir, but I assure you, it will never have come to that.”

“So we’ve come to an agreement?”

The two men linked and shook hands across the table, completely disregarding the fact you were right beside him. You were beyond appalled, but mostly hurt that you’d been reduced to this way. And they were unaware of it, too, sickening and satisfied yet tense smiles were masked on their faces as they decided your future.

You stood up and left the restaurant.

You kept walking as fast as you could in the cold night, hands shoved into the coat of your pockets. Thousands of pin needles pricked at your heart and your skin the more you replayed the memory in your head. How stupid were you to think that Satoru would be different? And marriage? Was he serious? It all made you sick to the core to the point you wanted to throw up and disappear, until a heavy set of footsteps echoed behind you and tugged your wrist.

“Y/N, wait!” Satoru panted, hands on his knees as he tried to catch his breath. “What’s wrong with you? You just up and left—”

“Seriously, Satoru, you’re asking me that?” your face fell flat at his cluelessness, “What’s wrong with you? You men are sickening; planning my entire future like that right in front of me as if I don’t have a say in what I want. None of you asked if I’m okay with this. You really went ahead deciding we’ll get married when I told you already, I don’t want to marry you and I never will!”

Satoru brushed a hand over his hair, a hand on his hip. You could tell his patience was being tested – after being verbally harassed by your father and now with you pushing back in the same heat, it was only a matter of time before he lost his cool. Surprisingly enough, however, his voice remained levelled as he sighed. “What did you expect me to do back there? Tell your father that we’re just going to be roommates and raise a child together as if we’re not already family?” he defended, words slow and pronounced with a hint of hurt behind them. “I respect you and I truly do want to be with you, that’s why I wanted us to get married.”

“You respect me?” you laughed incredulously, “Are you hearing yourself right now? No person respects another by deciding what happens to my life without my consent!”

“I’m sorry I didn’t ask, okay? I apologize for it and I acknowledge my mistake that I didn’t give you much of a choice. Me being cornered and pressured isn’t a good excuse, but I wasn’t lying when I said I want to take care of you and—”

“Why?”

“What do you mean why?”

“Why do you want to be with me?” you demanded, “Why do you want to take care of me so badly? How did you even take this so well? You weren’t even that angry when I told you I was pregnant.”

Satoru paled. “Was I supposed to be? Should I have pushed you away and kicked you out my life? Is that what you wanted me to do, or is that what you expected from me, considering you’ve made it extremely clear I’m nothing but your airheaded boss and a man who always wants his dick wet, right?” the sting of his words pricked you both – you with your guilt, and him with his pride crushed. But he didn’t let on, didn’t waver and didn’t match your anger as his chest shook with impatience. “I’m trying to be good to you; I want to be good for you and the baby because despite what you think of me, I’m not the devil the tabloids make me out to be. I sleep around, yeah, but I wouldn’t go so far to turn someone away especially when I know I’m supposed to be there.”

“Satoru, if you’re only doing this out of obligation, you can be a good father without marrying me. Marriage is not a requirement; I don’t care what people say that I got pregnant without getting married. That’s the least of my concern, I just want the baby to grow up healthy but I don’t want to be involved with you.”

With how stunned Satoru looked, one would’ve thought you slapped him right in the face. That mere sight of seeing your boss tear his walls down in front of you almost made you feel bad, but you had to be strong.

You had to be firm with what you stood for.

“I really don’t want to be with you, Satoru. I’m so sorry.”

“What do you want me to do?” his voice cracked, begging and pleading as he stood before you, looking every bit of a man lost in uncharted territory. “I don’t know what you want me to do, Y/N. One moment, you’re telling me you want me to be a good father, and then the next you’re pushing me away. People are so sure that I’m a man who can never settle down because they believe I have commitment issues, but I’m telling you I can commit to you right now,” he held your hand, rubbing some of his warmth at your comparably cold ones. You didn’t fail to notice that he was trembling, but what about what you couldn’t decipher. “Are you really sure I’m the one here who isn’t capable of that? What are you so scared of that you can’t trust me?”

“Because you’re you! Because you’re a fucking asshole who’s been treating me like I’m an overworking machine and always expects me to undo your shit for you! Because you make me sick and I don’t want to be with someone who doesn’t know what love means!” Exploded. You exploded. “I regret everything that happened between us that night. No, in fact, I regret ever meeting you at all.”

Satoru took a step back.

All the light and joy that fit so perfectly with him had now disappeared.

“I’m sorry,” he demurred, “I’m sorry that I’d been so repulsive that you’ve felt miserable for all this time. I’m sorry I haven’t been a decent boss and I’m sorry I’m not good enough for you.”

“Gojo, stop. Stop doing that; stop apologizing!”

“Then tell me what you want me to do,” he barked desperately. “Because I can’t read your mind and I just want to be good for you.”

“What if I don’t want you to? I don’t want you to be good to me, I don’t want you to care about me. Be there for the baby, but don’t involve yourself too much in my personal life. Stop asking me to marry you because you and I would never work out. We’re impossible, okay?”

“How do you know we’ll never work out when we haven’t even tried?” he pushed, “You never even gave me a chance.”

“You’re not worth that chance.”

If someone could receive an award for effortlessly trampling over someone repeatedly, you would’ve been crowned winner a long time ago. You had no idea what came over you as you spat all those hurtful words to Satoru, but did your words bear no truth? The fact that he no longer defended himself meant he also knew that he wasn’t worth it – that he wasn’t someone to be trusted. It wasn’t that you were completely unfair too; of course you considered it. Weeks of living under the same roof as him and you most definitely considered it. Say you did get married and became a real family – what then? It wasn’t a marriage out of love, but rather out of responsibility and obligation.

As much as you loved your child, you couldn’t imagine throwing away your future and living miserable for the rest of your life like that.

A life built on lies wasn’t a life worth living.

“I would never hurt you.”

Your heart cracked. After everything you said, after all your efforts to keep him away from your own safety, after all the hurtful things you’ve done to him, and he was still apologizing? Why did he have to make it so hard to let go? You were tired, so tired that you could no longer refrain your lip from quivering as tears caked your face.

“Gojo, please, don’t—”

“So if me stepping away from your life is what would really make you happy, then I’ll respect it. But there’s one thing I have to ask,” Satoru swiped a thumb under your eye to catch the tear. His smile was forlorn, his touch cold and words melancholic. “Do you want the baby? Do you...want to keep the baby and be a mother? You don’t have to do anything for me, I just want to know if the mother of my child even wants to be one. And please be honest, because everything you say right now are words that I’ll mark seriously.”

The word left your mouth before you could stop it.

“No.”

“No what?”

“I don’t want to be a mother,” you admitted, hands trailing over your belly. It felt like you were betraying your own child, but you hadn’t planned this. “I’m too young, Satoru, I-I’m not ready for this. With you there beside me or not, I really don’t want this.”

“Then,” he cleared his throat, turning his head to the side to catch a moment. You swore you saw his eyes shine under the city lights with tears, but it was gone so soon that you might’ve just fooled yourself with it. Once he deemed himself ready to talk, Satoru took a deep breath. “Do I have your consent that once the baby is born...it’ll be under my care? Would you prefer to reach your own dreams, then? You’ll never have to be a part of the Gojo family if it’s really not what you want, even though I could support you as much as you need me to.”

Your eyes widened at his proposition. “You’ll take care of our baby?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Can I...can I visit them, at least, once in a while?” It was more than just your heart that broke that night. There was no telling whether you’d hurt yourself in the long run with this decision. It was no easy choice to make – to actively pursue your dreams somewhere else more than being a mother. You wanted to do your best, of course you did, but it wasn’t that easy. Gojo didn’t have to tell you for you to understand that once you married him, you’d be expected to run the business with him and be involved in his family and their dramas. Now that wasn’t a life you wanted.

“You’re free to visit them whenever,” he promised, voice fading even lower into the background. “So is this it? We’ll just be living under the same roof until the baby is born and once they’re here...”

“We’ll part ways.”

“We’ll part ways,” he nodded in agreement, sniffling for a brief second before fixing his tie. The Gojo Satoru you got to know for a few weeks had now disappeared. Not even the goofy boss you spent seven years with could be found in the coldness of his eyes, almost as if he’d put up such impenetrable walls around him and nothing could pass through. The sudden shift in aura made your heart clench as he offered his hand to shake. “Okay. Let’s stay professional until then?”

“Yeah, Sir, I can do that,” your hands shook as you enclosed it around his, but now all the warmth had disappeared – from his eyes, his touch, his soul. It hurt, but this was necessary. It was what felt right. “Thank you – for everything.”

“You’re welcome. Anything for you and the baby,” Satoru proclaimed, perplexing you both when he suddenly pulled you in his arms. Just like that, the dam broke, and you were staining his precious suit before you could stop it. His arms rubbed up and down your back the longer he held you there, almost like a final moment to lean on one another before you had to say goodbye eventually. Beneath your palm, his heart beat exuberantly loud, so much so that you might’ve heard the prayers it whispered. “Stop crying now. The baby might feel sad too. We’ll both be alright – we just have to get through this.”

taglist OPEN: @sixeyesgojo @bongofrito @7tsumurai @aphnyoturkey @stuckindreamland06 @dogsarenyspiritanimal @thebeardedmoon @lildreamer93 @pizzaspirits @q-the-rockaholic @rogueofbullshit @ladywaifuuwrites @flochsgirl @hamsa-mage @sonic-and-songs @vsvwi @misslovingpearl | bolded users can’t be tagged

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lyranova · 2 years

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Hi, I really like your blog and was wondering if you could please write an angst with fluffy ending oneshot! Pairing: Yuno x reader. Idea: they're childhood friends and grew up together. The reader is a very powerful yet lazy Black Bull. One day, Yuno snaps and say hurtful things to the reader, because they "do nothing for anyone or anything", "are wasting their potential", etc. Reader is actually Iron deficient (anemic), and he never found out. Sorry if it's confusing!! 💕

Hiya anon! I’m so sorry these are taking a bit 😅, but I hope you enjoy this! I kinda know what anemia is since I suffered from it when I was a kid but its been a while, also I tried to make Yuno harsh even though i kind of failed at it since I can’t see him getting *too* mad hah 😅. I hope you enjoy the fic 🥰!

Word Count: 720

Warnings: None

———

Yuno walked determinedly towards the Black Bulls hideout, he was a man on a mission. Today, Asta had informed him that their childhood friend Y/N had been sleeping through all the mission briefings and had only gone on one or two missions since she had joined the squad. This would not do, not one bit.

He didn’t even bother knocking on the door before just walking inside the base. He looked around, it didn’t seem like any of the Black Bulls were here, otherwise they probably would have shouted and tried to attack him by now. He shook his head and began walking down the hall to where Y/N’a room was. He remembered the directions as she was so excited about having her own room that she just had to show him, he smiled fondly at the memory before turning serious as he stood in front of her door.

Yuno knocked on it firmly, awaiting Y/N’s response. When she muttered ‘come in’ he walked in and saw her lying in bed.

“ Yuno? What’re you doing here?” Y/N asked as she sat up and looked at her dark haired friend, she knew something was up since he had his serious scowl on his face.

“ Asta told me you haven’t been going on missions lately, instead you’ve been sleeping or just lying around the Hideout.” Yuno said as he walked over to her and stood next to the bed. Y/N sat up a little straighter and looked down at her comforter.

“ Oh.” She muttered, she could feel her friends scolding eyes staring down at her.

“ ‘Oh’? That’s all you have to say? You’re a Magic Knight, and a strong one at that, but instead of going out there and proving yourself, you’re lying in bed wasting your potential.” She visibly winced at Yuno’s harsh words.

“ It’s not like I choose to be this way, if I could go out with the others and go on missions I would but I can’t.” Y/N argued as she looked up at her friend, finally meeting his gaze. Yuno crossed his arms and raised a disbelieving brow.

“ Really? Then why can’t you?” He asked, his tone slightly more curious than harsh. Y/N let out a soft sigh before looking away.

“ I suffer from a condition called Anemia, it means I have lower than normal Iron and that causes me to be more lethargic and have less energy. I wasn’t diagnosed with it until I came to the Capital and Dr. Owen saw me.” Y/N said sheepishly, Yuno blinked in surprise, his arms falling at his sides.

“ Anemia?” He muttered softly, his voice now full of regret. “ Why didn’t you tell me? Or Asta?” He sat down on the bed next to her.

“ Because I didn’t want to worry you, either of you, you’re both so busy these days trying to become the Wizard King that I figured that I would just be a burden or I would get in the way. So I kept it to myself.” Y/N explained sheepishly, she had always felt like she bothered him and Asta when they were children because, even though she was powerful, she didn’t have the energy or stamina like they did.

“ Y/N, you’re not a burden and you never will be. This isn’t your fault. If you had just told us then I would have tried to do whatever I could to help you get better.” Yuno told her as he blushed a bit and rubbed the back of his head. “ You’re one of my best friends and I don’t want anything to happen to you.”

“ I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have kept this from you, if something like this ever happens again I’ll make sure you’re the first person I tell.” Y/N said with a small smile. “ I promise!” She added with a giggle as she held out her pinky towards him, Yuno looked from her pinky to her face and back again before he smiled slightly and hooked his finger around hers.

The next morning, Yuno dropped off some herbs and supplements that Owen suggested Y/N to take to help with her Anemia. He did that every day until she got better, and even continued dropping by the Hideout even after she had recovered.

———

Thank you all for reading and I hope you all have a good day 🥰!

#asks #anon 🌟#black clover #black clover x reader #black clover x you #black clover fanfic #black clover fanfiction #yuno x reader #yuno x you #black clover yuno #yuno grinberryall #yuno grinberryall x reader

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lolibles · 3 years

Text

A-Z with kazuha

character: kazuha x reader

pure fluff, complete brainrot, some angst not much tho

synopsis: the fluff alphabet with kazuha

implied gn!reader but please let me know if there are any mistakes or things i should look out for when writing gn!reader, im still learning!! <3 NOT PROOFREAD its so long and im lazy :)

A- how affectionate are they with their s/o?

kazuha is a very affectionate person, and he doesn’t try to hide it. kazuha is known for his flowery words, while kazuha loves to turn all kinds of things into poetry, its painfully obvious when one is about you. kazuha never fails to show his affection and love to you with his words and endless haikus of you. he can not stop talking about you, and even though sometimes he does it to tease you and get a laugh at your flustered expression, every time he declares his undying love for you, he means it.

B- what their s/o does that takes their breath away?

there are many things you do that take his breath away, but one thing that makes his heart do backflips is when you remember his haikus, and keep his gifted poems. kazuha has dedicated too many of his poems to you to count, kazuha himself can barely remember all of them. so you can say he was very shocked when one night you randomly whispered a poem he created for you months ago into his ear. kazuha was beyond shocked, his head never turned so fast to look at you, eyes widening. when he asked how you still remembered it, you pulled out a little notebook with scribbles of the poems and pieces of paper stuck inside with notes of dates, and the occasional doodles. you said it was so you never forget any of them, even when you were old. as kazuha flipped through the book he noticed poems from as far back as when he barely knew you. kazuha turned back to you and buried his head in your neck, attempting to hide the blush on his face as he kept mumbling i love you. his heart was swooning with love and joy for you, he knew you loved him, but he never knew something as simple as that could make his whole world stop.

C- do they like cuddling? if so, how and when?

kazuha loves cuddling so much. kazuha is honestly pretty touch starved so he constantly craves your touch. kazuha also gets pretty tired after working a full day out on the alcor or helping out with the resistance. he believes after a full days worth of hard work nothing beats lazing around tangled in your arms. kazuha doesn’t mind being the big spoon or little spoon. there are times of vulnerability where kazuha just needs you to hold him close, run your fingers through his hair and tell him everything will be okay. and there are times where he wants to hold you tight in his embrace as if he was protecting you for the most malicious forces in the world. there are also times where he simply just wants to be close to you, bodies smushed together, his hands wrapped around you with his neck buried in your collar. he tries to make you laugh or giggle so he can feel the vibrations of your sweet voice. kazuha loves to cuddle you at night before bed, he loves to fall asleep with you, the sound of your heartbeat lulling him to sleep, the warmth of your body is so pleasant and inviting. however cuddling at night often means waking up much later than usual. it means that either beidou or gorou angrily barging into your quarters to wake you guys up because you both were late, threatening to split the both of you up since you can never wake up on time.

D- what do they dream of doing with their s/o?

kazuha is a simple man, he finds joy and love in the littlest things. but that doesn’t ever stop him for dreaming- or rather hoping. he wishes one day he can walk down the streets of his hometown and show you the different sights. he hopes that there will be a day when he can see you wear a kimono, under the moonlight as he takes you up to a secluded spot to view the beautiful fireworks, although he will argue that you are far more lovely. kazuha hopes to bring you to see the sakura trees bloom, as you talk about how you wished you could’ve have seen them earlier, he wishes he can brush off the flower petals on your head before pulling you in for a gentle kiss. most importantly kazuha hopes that one day, he can bring you to visit his friend. even if he no longer is blessed upon this world, kazuha is sure he would have loved you. it is only necessary for kazuha to introduce his beloved to his only family.

E- how much effort do they put into the relationship?

kazuha pours his entire soul into your relationship, you are the only one he has left after all. kazuha believes his sole purpose is to treat you like his queen, if even for a second you feel like you aren’t loved, then he has failed. kazuha wants to serve you, though you often tell him he should try to put himself first, he’d merely chuckle and say “if i’m the reason you smile as brightly as the sun, the reason you sleep well at night or the reason you wish to wake up the next day. then there is not a thing i would change.”

F - do they want to start a family with their s/o? what is parenting like with them?

after getting over kazuha's fear of marriage (check M), kazuha wouldn't mind starting a family. although he is perfectly fine if it is just the two of you. if you want children then he is ready to learn, for you. i think kazuha would settle with one or two children, and he says he doesn't mind if you have a girl or a boy- but he is hoping on a boy. kazuha would be a great dad, apart from the fact he travels a lot and is rarely home. he tries his best to be there for you, he usually takes on jobs in the area you are staying or go on shorter trips with the crux while you are in the first few years having a child. he doesn't want to leave all the work to you of raising a young child, nor does he want to miss out those precious years of being a new parent. he loves adventuring but he loves his family too. another thing kazuha can not get enough of is seeing the look on your child's face when he arrives back after a trip, waiting for him at the harbour, flailing their arms about to capture his attention. and he can not ignore the look on your face either, so happy that your loving husband is home. kazuha can be strict but he prefers not to be, he can't say no to those curious eyes that look just like yours. i like to think that kazuha teaches your child to be a smooth talker just like him, this means they both get out of trouble a lot with you. despite kazuha's aloof demeanour, he actually has a rather playful side to him often pulling small pranks with your child on you. he tells your child stories of all kinds of adventures he has been on, your heart swoons at the sight of your child resting atop his chest trying his best not to fall asleep due to the warmth kazuha radiates. kazuha teaches your child all about inazuma and his heritage, telling them about the history and how one day he will bring both them and you to visit his homeland. the safety of his family is his number one priority, he will do anything to protect you and your child. he also teaches your child how to fight, and most importantly self-defence. if you both are travellers though, you decide to wait until your child is older to bring them on your adventures. and when they are, beidou certainly doesn't mind having a little kid running around the alcor causing a ruckus amongst other crew members.

G- what kind of gifts to they give their s/o? do they want one in return?

kazuha has always loved the sentiment of crafting a handmade gift. the amount of time and effort that goes into making something, is enough to show how much love someone has for them. kazuha also always loves to imagine what kind of expression you’d have after receiving his gift, he never asks for anything in return, well actually occasionally he’ll ask for a kiss thats it. kazuha remembers making you a beautiful hairpin, one that matched with his maple leaf haori. he gave it to you one night randomly, his hands pushing aside a bit of your hair to pin up. the way your eyes closed as he inches closer, his fingers occasionally brushing against your skin. when he finally backed away from you to take a look at his masterpiece, he was stunned. the way your face glistened from under the moonlight, you were so ethereal. his breath hitched, and the calm man sitting in front of you became flustered. kazuha made a note to always mentally prepare himself before giving you a gift that you could physically wear- if not he’d definitely blow a fuse.

H- do they hug their s/o? how often?

kazuha definitely hugs you, but i feel like hugs only happen at specific times. of course he will indulge you if you ask for it. kazuha hugs you when he misses you, when he needs you close to him. if you didn’t travel with him, he hugs you a goodbye and a hello. kazuha hugs you tightly because he knows he will be leaving soon, or he misses you so much and never wants to let you go. if someone ever makes kazuha jealous (which doesn’t happen very often), he will hug you from your waist whilst no one was looking, as he buries his head into your neck, taking in your scent. “your mine.” he’d whisper, hugging you tighter. “i am yours.”

I- how romantic are they? do they have problems with being intimate?

kazuha has very little problems with intimacy, he is a naturally romantic person. the way he speaks should be more than enough as evidence. he doesn’t get flustered easily, and he loves to see your expressions when he does something overly romantic- cheesy even, at the most random times. his poetry and haikus are often of you, he doesn’t shy away from flirting with you, teasing you, and constantly he is thinking of different ways to show his love to you. like i said he never knows what may happen tomorrow, so he is going to spend every day in the present being romantic and loving to you.

J- do they get jealous easily? how do they act?

i can’t typically see kazuha as getting jealous easily. there is often the rare occasion of him getting impatient because someone else has held your attention for too long, but other than that its very rare for kazuha to get jealous- he trusts you too much and feels like there’s simply no need for such feelings. i feel like one of the only few times kazuha would get jealous is when he’s drunk. drunk kazuha is needy and clingy, he wants to be around no one but you. if there is the slightest bit of space between you two, kazuha is determined to get rid of it by any means necessary. if you’re having a conversation with someone, be prepared to continue it another day because kazuha is whisking you away and peppering you with kisses while glaring at the person who kept you away from him the whole time. it gets a little uncontrollable when it happens, but kazuha remembers everything that happens the night before and his reaction is absolutely priceless.

K- are they a good kisser? do they like it? how often?

kazuha is miraculously a great kisser, well that is debatable from the beginning since he didn’t have much experience but he learnt very fast, and he is an amazing learner. kazuha’s everyday kisses can range from many varieties. kazuha’s forehead kisses usually linger for just the right amount of time, they are comforting and homely. it feels like you can tell how much kazuha trusts and adores you when he gives you forehead kisses. kazuha’s cheek kisses are different. they are quick and fleeting, usually he peppers your face with them, instead of a single kiss. it is playful and often filled with laughter, kazuha does it with a teasing note as his hands cup your face and pulls you closer for another kiss attack. lastly kazuha’s kisses on your lips, saved for the most romantic and intimate moments you share. often hidden from the public where kazuha can show you how much he loves you without any interruptions. they are passionate and always leaves the both of you wanting for more. he kisses you not too rough not too gentle, just until your lips are slightly plump and red. he takes your cheek in his hand, his other on your waist, pulling you close he whispers “may i?” and if you allow him, he will make sure this is a kiss you never forget.

bonus: kisses on the back of your neck, saved for the most private moments. if you have longer hair he likes to brush your hair back and place a teasing kiss on your neck, just to see you get flustered. and if you have shorter hair he finds himself often staring at the back of your neck, and just decides to indulge himself a few times with a kiss- teasing you along the way.

L- when do they say i love you? how often? do they say or show it more?

kazuha has always been more of a mix of both, he tends to show his love a lot yet he never fails to let you know he loves you. kazuha says it when it is just the two of you, when he has your attention and he has yours. he says it while tangled in your arms, under the blankets as you try to fight the feeling of sleep so you can spend more time with your beloved. kazuha shows it in his actions, even if done unconsciously, he somehow manages to convey ‘i love you’. its evident in the way he smiles for you, his eyes glistening as he lets out a hearty laugh. its evident in the way he holds your hand, guiding you down the stairs- even though you are perfectly capable of walking on your own. it is evident in the way he stares at you while you patch him up after he got hurt again, listening to your mother-like nagging to be careful. he doesn’t always say it outright, but you know, you know he loves you.

M- thoughts on marriage? how do they want to hold the ceremony?

well kazuha definitely has thought about it, thats for sure. in all honesty he is a little intimidated by the idea of marriage. don’t get me wrong, he wants to get married to you, its just kazuha has an interesting past. he’s afraid that somehow even if he’s miles away from her, she’d end up coming back to haunt him, and this time take you too. kazuha also knows unlike others, he can’t offer you the most stable life. he fled from his own country, a god literally wants him dead. he wanders around without an end destination, no real home anymore. he wonders if you really want to get married to someone like him- this thoughts are the things that keep him awake at night. if you ever help kazuha get over his fears and make him understand you love him for who he is now, perhaps he wouldn’t hesitate before popping the question. he would love a quiet and small ceremony, he doesn’t mind a grand wedding but he would prefer something more lowkey and intimate. no distractions so he can take it all in, you finally are his.

N- what are dates like with them? how often do you guys have night outs?

dates aren’t as easy to come by with kazuha, working on the sea or with the resistance means work needs to be done and there isn’t much time for going out. but kazuha makes it work, most of the time its rather spontaneous. kazuha would appear before you and ask you to close your eyes, taking your hands in his to guide you to a little spot he made up on the alcor. hidden away from the drunkards causing a ruckus on deck. he sits you down next to him on a nice blanket and asks you to open your eyes. its a cute little get up, a few snacks and sake under the stars. kazuha would apologise for not being able to give you a proper date, yet you couldn’t ask for more. he’d pull you close saying he didn’t want you to get cold, and he’d teach you about stars and constellations.

another time while you both were working hard for the resistance, kazuha showed up by your tent at night and asked you to accompany for a walk. kazuha would take your hand in his, as he carried an umbrella over your heads. he wouldn’t bring you too far from camp but he tried to make your time worthwhile. he’d tell you about the poems he made of you the afternoon since he missed you the whole day. he’d promise to take you somewhere nicer once everything was under control again- he gives your hand a squeeze and kisses you on the cheek. it wasn’t much but it was all you both had. )

O- what would they do if their s/o got hurt or injured badly? (ouch)

it doesn’t matter how hurt you got, small or big, kazuha feels his world stop spinning. his mind flashes back to the moment he watched his friend die, and he desperately tries to keep his emotions at bay. tears threaten to spill, his voice cracks as he asks where you are. he gets to you as fast as he can, he begs that his legs don't give way yet. he blames himself for not being able to protect you, he couldn't save his friend, but please not you. the moment he catches the glimpse of your body bandaged up, bruises scattered all over skin, he can not contain the amount of guilt that rushes over himself. kazuha is by your side in an instant, taking your hand gently as he lets his eyes scan over your injury. he doesn't stop apologising, he lowers his head as he lets the waterworks run. ironically watching kazuha blame himself for not being able to protect you hurts more than the injuries you have sustained. if you can, please take him into your arms, tell him it's not his fault and you are okay. kazuha wouldn't know what to do if you were gone too.

P- are they playful in the relationship? how do they mess around with their s/o?

it may not look like it, but kazuha is rather playful. especially when it is just the two of you, kazuha suppresses the urge to not tease you. he can't help that you are just so easy to tease. he likes to challenge you to little games at the expense of a kiss. he loves seeing your expressions when he teases you, or purposely loses to you at a game. he also loves to flirt with you, tell you how much he loves you and how much he wants to make you his- even if you already are. he definitely is the type to ask you if your single and want to date him while you are dating, he says "your boyfriend doesn't need to know, so just come with me" and if you play along he falls more in love. it's also dangerous if your a ticklish person, he will often poke you just to hear your laugh or squeal. he craves to hear your melodic laugh, he never wants you to shut up. kazuha is never mean when he plays around with you though, he never crosses the line and he can read the mood well. he knows when is the right time to mess around with you, and he knows when to stop. as much as he loves it he never wants to make you mad. i

Q- what will they do if their s/o is queer or part of the LGBT community? how will they react?

kazuha doesn't mind, he believes that love is love and coincidentally he loves you for you. kazuha listens and is keen on learning your past and why you decides to be who you are now. he picks up on your prefered pronouns without hesitation and treats you with nothing but respect. if you are insecure about it, he will make it his only goal to write you a poem a day about how much he loves you and how much he wishes for you to find self love. kazuha is aware of the occasional disapproval from outsiders, and he doesn't think twice before using his vision to mess with them, knocking them off their balance or messing up their hair. he tells you that others may say what they want but you need not worry for there are many others who love you and will love you for the rest of their lives- him included.

R- how random and spontaneous is the relationship?

a relationship with kazuha is beyond random. there are moments when kazuha just grabs your hand and takes you away to some place because he wants to be with you. kazuha enjoys surprising you with things as well, if he sees something he thinks you will like, he will buy it or attempt to make it for you. when he travels he definitely brings you back pressed flowers or pretty gemstones that remind him of you. kazuha often does things for you on a "just because" basis, even if it holds no significant reason, he will give you a gift, give you a kiss or whatever you want. kazuha also randomly declares his love for you just because.

S- what do they do is their s/o is scared?

kazuha knows what its like to be scared, to feel petrified to the point its hard to breathe, hard to speak, hard to move. his world crumbles at the thought of how you may go through emotions like that. he never wants you to go through any pain, it simply doesn’t matter what causes you to feel so frightened. if it scares you, it scares you. there is no need for him to laugh at you or belittle your feelings. kazuha will never forgive himself if he makes you feel invalidated. when you are scared, kazuha will be by your side in an instant, his arms engulfing you like a warm blanket, as he whispers sweet nothings into you ear. he asks you to focus on his fingers tracing shapes onto your back. he doesn’t let go of you until he feel your heart rate return to normal. and when it does, he releases you from his tight grip to kiss away the tears rolling down your cheeks. giving you a simple smile. “my love, i wont let anything harm you. i love you.”

T- how much do they trust their s/o?

to be in a relationship means kazuha trusts you a lot. kazuha has gone through much, and is constantly on the run. there are few people he can open up to and trust that they would not leave him behind. it takes a while for kazuha to tell you about everything, don't get me wrong he knows he loves you but it isn't easy to bring something so dark about his past to light. he hopes you don't get mad or disturbed by him for keeping it hidden for so long. when he finally does tell you about his past, and you stick by him no matter what he feels his heart slowly gets put back into place.

U- do they like to take things slow or fast? (urgency)

kazuha takes things at a pretty average pace. honestly it's kind of like a write off, he knows it will take him a while to fully trust someone yet he is undoubtedly touch-starved. and when it comes to you he can't seem to hold himself back. when kazuha courts you its slow and relaxed, he never wants to force you into a relationship and make you uncomfortable. he takes his time to learn what you like and dislike, he takes his time to get to know you. and when you finally start dating he tends to take things faster, not too fast though, he makes sure everything he does is okay with you before rushing in head first. unconsciously he tends to touch you a lot, he finds comfort in your warmth. sometimes it's as simple as brushing your hair back, and sometimes it's having his hands on your thigh while you sit next to him. he just loves it so much.

V- how vocal are they about the relationship? do they want it to be a secret?

kazuha prefers to keep it lowkey. only a few people know of your relationship with him. he doesn't want you to get hurt because of him, after all he is rather infamous for escaping from the shogunate and their leader. he also is more on the private side. however its very easy to tell that kazuha is infatuated with you solely by the way he looks at you, talk of you. you can tell that he is completely smitten over you, it takes someone awfully dense to not realise his feelings for you.

W- random scenario with them! (wild card)

the first time kazuha saw you dressed up so beautifully was when beidou insisted that the both of you attended a party in liyue with her. he didn't enjoy parties as much but he thought it would be nice for you to take a break from running away, and if you were there he was sure it would be a lot more bearable. and he was right, it was. beidou had whisked you away earlier to be presentable for the occasion, kazuha himself had to wear something he wasn't used to- he thought it was uncomfortable. but the moment he saw you walk out of the room dressed to the nines, all the discomfort that came with his outfit was thrown out the window and replaced with fluster. kazuha was quick to regain his normal charm however, throwing compliments in your directions as he held out his arm for you to hold- yet not even his sly behaviour could escape your eyes, there indeed was a blush on his cheeks. beidou left the two of you to be, enjoying the food and lovely music playing in the background, yet all kazuha could hear was the melody of your voice. as the room fell silent and a slow tune began, kazuha earned a few nudges from beidou "ask them to dance" she whispered. and he did, it felt like it was straight out of a fairy tale. his eyes were burning into yours as he reached his hand out. you gladly accepted, but you never knew kazuha had learnt to dance, especially so well. you suppose everything about him is eloquent. the moment was something you'd cherish for the entirety of your life, the feeling of him guiding your footsteps along to his. his hands resting perfecting on your waist as yours did by his neck. he often made small jokes about the other stuck up guests, which made you laugh. his heart fluttered. as the song came to an end, you gave him a small kiss on his cheek. a smile appeared on his face, your action warming his chest.

"won't you dance with me again, my love?"

X- do they like petnames? do they use petnames? (XOXO)

kazuha loves using petnames on you. he likes to call you darling or my love. he finds using nicknames rather endearing, and he loves how you react with a simple "hm?" because you know he loves you like that. if you ever give kazuha a petname his heart swoons in adoration for you. he loves them! but kazuha also loves the way his name rolls off your tongue, the sound of your voice is like maple syrup in his ears.

Y- what do they do when they yearn for you?

missing you is something kazuha is unfortunately used to. given that kazuha is a traveller it is understandable why you two are often apart. when kazuha misses you, everyone can tell. especially since your absence in his life is all his poetry becomes. he muses how you are and how it hurts being so far from you. he often finds himself immersed in creating more haikus to show you when he finally reunites with you. more here.

Z- what is sleeping like with them? (zzz)

sleeping with kazuha is warm, you never have to fear the cold especially with kazuha's arms wrapped protectively around you. kazuha doesn't care whether he is the big spoon or small spoon, he just wants to be with you. if he spoons you, just make sure that he wakes up earlier than you if not he is never letting go. his grip is not too tight but still very strong around you. he enjoys being close to you and he loves how you let him be near you. if you are spooning him, please let kazuha rest his head in the crook of your neck. he loves to feel your heartbeat as he tries to fall asleep, the last thing he hears is your heart thumping every so peacefully. the smell of your soap puts him to sleep in a way he never knew it could. he loves how this time you wrap your arms around him to protect him instead, for once he feels like in your arms, he is perfectly safe.

oh my god this took so damn long???? but i didn't have much inspiration and this just came to mind. some letters were EXTREMELY hard to write so please excuse if its a little ooc i tried ;-; im glad im done tho, this honestly is the longest thing i have written in a very very long time and im really happy i did. im also pretty excited to try it for other characters i already have childe's and xiao's one in mind :) anyway!!!!!! please let me know if you liked this thank u bebs muah...

#lolible writes #genshin #kazuha #kazuha x reader #genshin x reader #kazuha imagines #genshin imagines #kazuha fluff #kazuha angst #genshin fluff #genshin angst #lolible likes writing

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