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kiribakuhappiness · 3 years

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Hiiiii if you have time could I please request a HC on how bakugou studies and works out? I was down for a few days so I wanted to read about bakugou but there aren't any really. I don't wanna force this on you byyy love you❤️❤️😀

Heyyy, I am super late to seeing this (I’m literally going through hundreds and hundreds of asks right now scouring for prompts and trying to do a little spring cleaning) and I came across this and it makes me so happy to talk about Blasty McGonnaHaveAStroke that I just really wanted to answer it - I hope that’s okay!

My perception of Bakugou Katsuki is ever changing because he’s developing so quickly in so many different areas of his personality (honestly, such a well written character, I’m really enjoying watching him morph and grow over the past few seasons) and I feel like I grow to know him more and more with each fic / drabble I write where I can really delve into his mannerisms and way of being and so I have a lot of ideas for these little nuances in particular!

Studying:

We all know that Bakugou is high key suffering from Former Gifted-Child Syndrome (or whatever the popular term for it is on this site). He’s naturally talented and intelligent - but he’s also incredibly hard working, especially once he’s come to the realization that he’s become a Former Gifted-Child.

There’s a quote I saw circulating a while ago from Bakugou, something about “I came to this school not to find out what I can do, but to find out what I can’t do.” or something similar to that sentiment. Because Bakugou is already perceptive and smart, he recognizes all of the things he can do and all of the things he’s good at, what he needs to learn is how to better handle the things that he’s not good at and how he can work on himself to barrel forward on his path to become the best.

So I think that even though Bakugou is already smart and doesn’t have any trouble keeping one of the top spots in his entire class, I feel like he would also spend a good portion of his free time studying and doing homework. It’s one thing to be intelligent, but to keep such a high position like the 3rd spot or whatever he is, that means that he’s completing and handing in assignments regularly, receiving top marks in most likely all of his classes, and that requires a certain level of dedication.

But again, he’s also already highly intelligent. So he probably gets bored really easily. (I know I’ve mentioned it before but it’s kind of one of my favorite ‘little obscure details’ to note that there are several panels where Bakugou is depicted as not fully paying attention during lessons - gazing out the window or playing with his pencil and even closing his eyes and completely tuning Present Mic out with the internal monologue that English was super boring or something like that).

This is all a long-winded way to back up the fact that I feel like his notes would be quick and sloppy and probably wouldn’t have a lot of context clues so someone like Kirishima just reading over his notes probably wouldn’t understand half of the concepts just because they’re things Bakugou already knows so he didn’t deem them important enough to write down.

Someone else posted a bunch of screenshots of Bakugou Katsuki’s actual notebook or something (fuck, I wish I could find the original post but it’s lost in time and space at this point), and his handwriting isn’t messy per-say but I definitely imagine that they were just lazy, bored strokes maybe pressed down with a little more force than is actually needed, and if he wants to highlight something important to remember later, he probably does that thing where he circles it multiple times or boldly underlines and things like that instead of actually using any highlighters or colored tabs like Midoriya probably uses!

Working Out:

You know, I feel like not a lot of attention gets brought to how Bakugou would work out! Like, in all the fics where they mention him working out or whatever, he’s usually just sparring with someone or they mention that he’s pumping iron (lifting weights), but that’s about as in depth as it goes.

I spend too much of my time at the gym and personally I believe that Bakugou is that one dude that I would constantly pick on for “always skipping leg day” - in the fact that he probably focuses very heavily on core work outs and arms/shoulders, since those are the muscles that are most directly impacted by his quirk!

He probably does a ton of crunches, pull-ups, free weights, push-ups; anything that works his triceps, biceps, abs, core balance, etc. He also probably runs /A LOT/ because he isn’t too bulky, he’s actually got a very slender build considering the muscle mass he carries in his upper half, which means that he’s running cardio on the DAILY. If I were a gambling woman, I’d put money on the treadmill, the stepper, and a jump rope being his most important pieces of equipment for cardio training.

We also have to take into account his dietary habits. Like I said before, this boy is incredibly slender for someone with such broad shoulders and who carries a lot of his muscle mass in his shoulders/back, and it’s commonly accepted at this point that Bakugou is a good chef (judging by the way his parents made him take music lessons growing up, I can assume that it was probably their idea as well for him to learn how to cook - whether that be through cooking classes or home-taught, it doesn’t really matter).

Mitsuki and Masaru are also canonly involved in the fashion industry - and we all know how, ahm... flawed the views in the fashion industry can be depending on location, culture, and societal beauty standards.

Katsuki probably has an immaculate diet. Protein, carbs, fresh fruit, calcium; he probably has a perfectly balanced palate and I can only ever dream cause ya girl just has sushi and LUNCHABLES as my only meal of the day today so, yaknow...

ANYWAYS.

All of that into consideration, I headcanon that Bakugou probably has a rotating shift for his work outs; cardio every day for ~30 minutes (most likely a warm up with the jump ropes or a jog/sprint alternating between low intensity and high intensity settings on the treadmill or stair stepper), then he probably has a circuit. So say for arms, he’d probably use free weights (curls, pumps, etc), then pull-ups/push-ups, I could see him throwing in some shoulder stretches and a very light yoga routine to help keep himself flexible and adaptive.

I totally see him as a man to get hooked on focusing solely on arms/shoulders because it’s very easy to see improvement and quick results, plus the after swell of muscles when you’ve done a proper workout is like the world’s most authentic confidence boost you can ever experience, and I could picture Bakugou being addicted to a feeling like that.

However, as previously mentioned, he’s incredibly intelligent and perceptive, and he’s just kind of a no-bullshit, no-excuses kind of guy? He might WANT to just do arms/shoulders for the rest of eternity, but he knows that won’t make him GREAT, so he forces himself to cycle. Arms/shoulders, Core, Legs, Exclusive Yoga, repeat - all with cardio warm-ups and cool-downs.

I’d gander that on top of his school work and course studies, he’d have to keep his gym time somewhere between 2-3 hours daily, but he probably only realistically hits the gym about 2-3 times a week at most, since all of their other training exercises and other hero activities no doubt work his entire body, and with such a strenuous, active lifestyle, there wouldn’t be much need for him to go any more than that unless he really wanted to aggressively bulk up or something crazy, but with his body type he’ll most likely fill out naturally as well (another thing that’ll come all on its own that he won’t even have to work for; lucky fucking bastard).

Okay, I’ll shut up now about it :D Hope that was somewhat entertaining to read? Are headcanons fun to read about? They must be if people are asking but I always get so nervous like, dude literally nobody cares that you psychoanalyzed Bakugou Katsuki to the point where you’ve probably got his entire work week mapped out, and you know what?

You right - lmfao!

#ahxbabxha #wow this is much longer than I expected it to be #and it's so so late ahaha #this ask is so old #but uuuh #anyway #bakugou katsuki #bakugo katsuki #bakugou katsuki headcanons #bnha #my hero academia #asks

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kyoupann · 4 years

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Please do more of the writing head canons. It’s really interesting to see other people’s ideas on the topic, so if you can be bothered, I would highly appreciate more, thanks bye <3

Y’all don’t know how happy I am to talk about these headcanons, they are my babies and I love them so much :’) thanks for asking g <3

Handwriting Headcanons

Same dynamic as before, try to guess whose handwriting it is before reading and tell me how many you got right! <3

You can find the first post here (no need to check it tho)

Quick disclaimer: halfway through making my initial notes, I remembered I had one (1) single lesson of graphology in my applied linguistics class, but that was a year ago and some information might be off. I just thought it was neat to include.

Another quick disclaimer: I don’t know much about Hylian, but I like to think it has a similar stroke system to Japanese, so the pressure and accuracy of your strokes play a major role in your handwriting (among other things, ofc.) so there are some parts where I focus more on that

(First Row, from left to right)

Sky

Our first boy is mother hen! Believe it or not, he has the prettiest handwriting out of all of them! Sky: probably has nice, even elegant handwriting because Sun forced him to practice when they were little. In the end, that paid off because his handwriting is the prettiest one. There’s no pressure, but he is confident in what he writes that his lines aren’t thin. Mistakes? what is that? this boy has impeccable grammar and spelling. No mechanic errors to be found in his letters! I’d like to think that many of Hyrule’s classic/staple poems were originally written by the firt king aka sky child. Like, imagine, after a retiring from being a Person of Power (as the first ruler), Sky finds comfort in the arts: revisits his old woodcarvings and starts writing poetry about the world he still doesn’t fully understand. wowie. tldr: sky writes poetry and you can pry it from my cold dead hands.

This is what one of his letters would look like:

Next one is the one and only, our Hero of Time

2. Time

I’ll die on the “Time didn’t know how to read and write” hill. His handwriting is simple, not pretty but not messy. It has some grammar and spelling mistakes here and there. Can become unreadable if writing in a hurry, he sorts of forgets spaces between words are a thing/letters have different sizes and lowercase letters end up the same size as capital letters. I’m not saying he sometimes forgets to write articles: he just doesn’t want to. Honestly, he just has this dad-neat handwriting. He is a gentle dad and writes like a dad, if he puts too much pressure onto the paper, his handwriting become too sharp/angle-ish and ends up looking ugly. And as much as he would like to not care about it, in the end he does (:

Malon taught him how to write and it was quite the experience. At first he didn’t want to because he was ‘too old’ to learn and it was torture at first, but now look at him devouring his cowboy novels.

A chunk of his handwriting:

*sniff* such a dad quote.

3. my mansss, your 4x1 deal at Target: Four

Look, my boy is patient! He could do some nice and fancy lettering if he wanted to. He was taught that handwriting and spelling said a whole lot about him as a person, you know, like a first impression kinda thing; so he always proof reads more than twice before sending a letter. Super rare grammar mistakes.

The faster he writes, the more slant his writing becomes. Under stress/ when not sure how to write things down, run-on sentences are everywhere and his handwriting is inconsistent in general (I don’t headcanon each part of him having completely different handwriting because handwriting becomes muscle memory over time. It’s just slightly different variations of the same, like idk Vio’s handwriting is neater than Green’s and Red writes hearts instead of any dot/circle and no, I do not take constructive criticism on that, jk i do.) Adding on to each of the colours’ handwriting, I’d think Red and Green write with words slanted to the right( inclined), Vio is a mix of the opposite, so reclined and straight, and my mans blue a true neutral writes straight (kinda like Time’s).

The logic behind this is that inclined writing supposedly means honesty and need for giving (and getting) affection; reclined means, as you can probably imagine, defensiveness and repression of true feelings, but also shows great concentration; straight handwriting means self-control, observation and reflection as well as distrust and indifference. But as complete being (tm), Four just writes as in the image example which is not too straight and not too inclined, and I believe that’s a good middle for him

HOWEVER, if I’m feeling in the mood for crack, I totally accept this boy to have the ugliest, chicken scratches-looking handwriting! :’D It’s just funny to think that someone like him, who has to be precise and careful in his work, can't write neatly to save his life.

One of his letters would look like this:

Also I just LOVE how his hero titles look in this font ksksks

and that’s

(Middle row, from left to right)

4.- Mister Bunny Boy - Legend

His uncle taught him how to write. I’d call his handwriting pretty and neat at a first glance, but he presses too hard on the paper, most of the time staining the back or the following page. Sometimes will retrace some words if he doesn’t like how it looks (which only makes it messier). According to my notes, a thick or strong handwriting represents determination/commitment.

As I also headcanon him to know many languages, mechanical errors are more present than grammar ones; that is, weird capitalisation of words. Punctuation is somewhere in between; uses too many commas when he should just cut the sentence. he mixes punctuation from two languages or more in writing when too distracted (or too focused, because, well, pressure.); when he writes for himself, he has almost no problem following said language’s punctuation rules. Also, this is just polyglot culture, and I’m projecting a bit, but when he forgets a word in the language he’s writing, he just replaces it with its equivalent in another language because we don’t care about fluency, but rather functionality. in this household (more on that in my language hc, ksksks).

An example of his writing:

so powerful

4.- Mr. Wolfman, howl me a song - Twilight

I don’t have much for him because 1) I don’t think he writes a lot and 2) he is a hands-on/visual learner, I’ll die by that. He only learnt how to write because Ulli insisted it was important and he was not about to disrespect his momma; he IS That Guy, but doesn’t really write enough to have neat handwriting.

Many people seem to overlook the fact that his house is filled with books and write him as completely illiterate (which if not explored properly, ends up feeling a bit disrespectful and full of prejudice, but go off I guess; and that’s on my core Headcanons for Twi); however, he sticks to simple sentences. Knowing how to read and understanding a text is different from knowing how to write them. Like, when we would see a semicolon and understand its position in the text, but didn’t understand the nature of it. Is this clear? idk i’m sorry. So yeah, boy reads a lot, writes very little.

As for his Actual Handwriting, as opposed to Legend, his handwriting is thiccc but not because he presses into the paper; he is just that messy, he has no sense of ink-flow-control, he does what he can with what he has. To the untrained eye, his handwriting illegible letters like v, n, u are very similar; when he makes notes for himself he does it in the form of doodles or small ‘icons’. But! He reads a lot, so he rarely makes spelling mistakes (: he is your go-to guy when you don’t know how to write a word.

An example of his writing:

He keeps a journal, sue me.

3. My first born- Warrior

Okay, first off... I accept this is completely biased. I saw the idea and said “That’s True”. If you haven’t, please read Effective Communication; or The Lack of Thereof by htruona, a fic where the boys reflect on the language barriers between them. It’s incredibly funny and probably what made me start making these silly notes. So, if you’ve read that fic, you know where I’m going.

My man, Warrior, can’t fucking write. I mean, he physically can, but it’s very bad. Here’s the reason for it, tho, and it’s not his fault: Technically, he knew how to write alright but he joined the military and whatever note he had to write had to be concise or in the worst case coded. He mixes capital and lowercase letters. If we consider that he joined the military at around 15, his handwriting and grammar had yet to continue developing. Just think about how after summer break, your handwriting was always slightly worse than before because you didn’t write for an entire month. Now think what 2 years can do to that. Hmm, not cool, dude. He makes quick notes, when writing he’s all gotta go fast. he is the lighting mcqueen of writing; good for emergency messages, not ideal for love letters. His punctuation also suffered a lot, he only know full stops and commas and hardly uses them. A sentence for him is either one word or fifty without a single comma, no inbetween.

His hero title and an example of his writing.

(Bottom row, or what I like to call “fuck cursive” row)

7.- Magic man - Hyrule

I’m basic and I do agree with the popular headcanon of he not knowing how to write because well, y’all know his Hyrule. He only knows how to write his name because that’s important, same with numbers. I don’t see why would he write/read except checking the roadsigns. (he can even use this as an excuse for getting lost frequently; he thought it said something different.) But I do think that because his habitual reading consists of roadsigns, his ‘punctuation’ is weird af and places full stops/points/periods at the same level of his words and his commas/question/exclamation marks below them. Yk, creative license. Sadly, I don’t have much about my magic hands man so here’s what his writing would look like if he actually wrote a paragraph:

Man, I love Hyrule.

8.- Man, I don’t understand this boy - Wild

Cursive? ain’t nobody have the time for that. He woke up and had to save the world in his underwear while not knowing how to read nor write. He learnt during his journey and was taught by multiple people from different regions, that explains his inconsistent spelling of things and names for them. So Wild knows language variations for many items and uses them interchangeably (even if they aren’t exactly the same). Another headcanon related to writing/language skills that I’ve been thinking about is that if the shrine was able to cause amnesia, I’m sure there were other areas in the brain affected which leads us to language disorders such as agraphia and aphasia. But that’s a story for another day ksksksk

An example of his writing (after relearning)

9.- The best of sons - Wind

I don’t have much for him and that makes me sad. Look, he’s a kid, doing kid things like stabbing dudes on the head. This boy was taught cursive by his grandma, but could never do it and no one needs it anyway. His handwriting is good enough for his pirate life, Tetra is the one to handle Official stuff, he just gotta sign. Spelling and grammar mistakes abound. He is still relatively young and can correct his handwriting if he desires. But same as Wild, with how many times he’s been thrown out and hit his head, I’m starting to consider some language disorder for him as well.

An example of his writing:

aaand that’s it.

Thanks, y’all for showing interest in this silly thing uwu it was fun to finally talk about this. If you ever want to discuss ideas/headcanons(especially if they are related to language and culture), I’m your person (: I’m always happy to hear new headcanons. Feel free to add anything to this post either in a reply or in a reblog, I’d love to hear from y’all <3<3

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violetwolfraven · 3 years

Text

Ray Molina: Best Dad Ever

For the March 11th explosion of content thing. Just Violet being a fantom and doing my part for this!

Tw: mentioned death, mentioned abusive parents, mentioned panic attack.

So the boys can be seen and heard when directly touching Julie after the whole post-Orpheum glowy hug thing but Ray doesn’t know that just yet.

What he does know is that Julie’s mental health took a rapid turn for the better for seemingly no reason and then a couple weeks later he found out she joined a band without telling him.

He’s not stupid. He knows that’s probably because of the band, though he is a bit confused as to how she even met them.

He kinda figures it’s a kids and your internet tricks thing but there’s some flaws to this theory.

1) He asks Flynn what she knows about the boys only... it seems like she doesn’t know much of anything. That’s weird because he knows Julie tells her practically everything.

2) The boys have American accents despite Julie claiming they’re from Sweden.

3) Carlos is a terrible liar and on the rare occasion Julie actually talks about the boys he gets this weirdly conspiratorial look.

So anyway Ray doesn’t really believe it’s as simple as ‘I met these 3 Swedish boys on the internet’ but he trusts his daughter’s judgement and he leaves it alone.

Anyway he has other things to focus on.

Such as how Ray has literally never been able to keep track of his keys/phone/hats/camera parts/stuff and now it seems to just pop up whenever he’s looking for it.

Also he keeps feeling like there’s someone with him around the house more and more.

Like not a malicious presence like Victoria fears, and definitely not like Rose is around watching him, but like someone is there.

Sometimes it feels like there’s more than one presence around. None of them familiar but all of them friendly.

Oddly enough, whatever or whoever it is feels almost like Julie or Carlos. Young and excitable and like a verse of a happy song. He’s not sure why they’re around, but they definitely don’t feel dangerous, so Ray doesn’t feel threatened.

But some days a better comparison might be to Trevor back when Rose first introduced him. Raw and fragile and very, very sad.

Ray tries to put on happy music or a Disney cartoon or something on those days and he doesn’t quite know why or how but the energy usually gets more positive when he does that.

Anyway after a while of this (after the Orpheum performance) he starts noticing weird things that Carlos and Julie do now.

Carlos will just carry around a small whiteboard and a couple pens and he erases it whenever Ray comes into the room but before he does it almost looks like there’s two, three, or even four sets of handwriting on there.

And he walks in on Julie talking to herself like. All the time.

Carlos doesn’t ask for help on his math homework anymore. Julie makes this insanely good chicken recipe for dinner once and then clearly panics and lies when asked where she got it. Flynn makes a set of rainbow friendship bracelets one day while she’s hanging out at the Molina house but he doesn’t see Julie wearing the match to the one she keeps.

Plus Carrie starts hanging out at their house again?? Out of the blue?? And none of the girls have a good explanation for how they made up??

Then later Nick Danforth-Evans (who Julie used to talk about having a crush on but hasn’t in a while) starts hanging around too and the kid seems... well, Ray doesn’t want to throw the word ‘traumatized’ around, but he’s jumpy and guarded in a way that can only be described as a little bit traumatized.

So all 5 kids are clearly keeping some secret and Ray’s getting suspicious and worried.

He sits them down and asks what’s going on. Like is one of them having problems at home, or..?

The kids, simultaneously:

Julie: no, we’re just all in a play together!

Carlos: we’re fine we’re just ghost hunting!

Flynn: we’re exhibiting bisexual-pansexual-lesbian solidarity!

Carrie: Julie and the Phantoms and Dirty Candi are doing a collaboration album!

Nick: we all joined jazz band??

Ray’s calling bullshit at this point.

Then Julie and Nick both look up directly at the same spot, somewhere a couple feet above the arm of the couch, which is seemingly just empty air.

Whatever it is, it doesn’t seem like the other kids can see it but they all seem to be waiting for something and Ray is wondering if they’re sharing a hallucination??? Are they all on drugs??? Should he be worried???

Then Julie says to meet them in the studio in 30 minutes. Flynn, Carrie, and Nick go home to give the Molina family some alone time.

*cue music performance where Ray is introduced to the boys*

So anyway Julie and Carlos (with the help of the ghosts whenever one of them has something to say and grabs Julie’s hand) give him a clearly-sugarcoated version of the last few months.

Ghosts of Trevor’s dead bandmates help Julie reconnect with music, they form a band, they meet another ghost, other ghost accidentally gets them involved with evil magician ghost, Nick got possessed, Carrie figured it out and helped plot to get him un-possessed, evil magician ghost is still out there and they’re sticking together so he can’t get any of them in the future.

Despite how they say it like it’s no big deal, Ray now understands why the kids have been acting so weird because all these things sound scary and painful.

Also the more he thinks about it, the more he worries about the fact that he has three 17-year-old boys sleeping in his garage who died terribly of food poisoning.

They are children and they died incredibly painfully and then almost got enslaved and/or erased from existence.

Then one day Ray’s feeling one of those presences around the house again and he realizes it’s probably one of Julie’s ghost boys.

Ray: who’s there?

Whoever it is freaks out and leaves, and Ray takes notes for next time.

The next time he feels someone in the room, he has a notepad ready and he writes down “Luke, Alex, or Reggie?” from what he remembers from Julie’s introductions.

Immediately, there’s a spike of anxiety in the room.

Ray: it’s okay. You can stay and we don’t have to talk if you don’t want to. I’d like to know who it is I’m not talking to though.

There’s a few seconds of hesitation, and then the pen picks itself up and the name “Reggie” gets circled.

Ray: the bassist with the flannels, right?

Yeah, written in a teenage boy’s messy scrawl.

Ray: okay, do you want to watch a movie?

More hesitation, and Ray’s not sure what that’s about but he’s starting to suspect with the amount of fear still in the room, and there’s a good 20 seconds where Reggie doesn’t respond before I don’t know.

Ray: Moana or Tangled? Moana.

After that, he takes a page out of Carlos’s book and gets a small whiteboard with 3 pens that stick to it magnetically. Red for Reggie, blue for Luke, and pink for Alex.

Reggie has written conversations with him most, but Luke does sometimes too and Alex does least often but he’ll still request a movie occasionally.

All of them are wary around him and Ray doesn’t quite know what to do to earn their trust. But he asks questions about their preferences on things. He says they did good on their latest show. He remembers which movies are their favorites and introduces them to music he thinks are their styles.

Luke is a big fan of Fall Out Boy and Reggie fucking loves Taylor Swift.

Alex is less consistent but occasionally Ray will play a song and he’ll write something like This is a cool song.

He starts to be able to tell which energy is which even before they write who it is right around the time the boys start to be visible for longer and longer after playing.

They play a really good show and stay visible for like 2 full days and that’s the first (but not the last) time Ray really gets to get to know them.

He starts noticing after really good shows like that one how even more now that they can be seen, they’re all a little... off from how Nick and Carrie and Flynn act around him.

With Luke it’s mostly because he’s trying so hard to impress because *gasp* he and Julie are a thing but there’s still a little bit of tension that seems like it comes from something deeper than just being nervous around his girlfriend’s dad.

With Reggie it’s subtle caution. Like he’s happy to be hanging out with Ray but he’s constantly ready for something to go wrong. There’s a catch in his smile, a hesitation before he states an opinion, a practiced carefulness where he changes the subject at any sign of even mild frustration.

But with Alex... it’s mostly just avoidance. Like if he poofs in while visible and it just so happens that no one else is there, he’ll find an excuse to leave.

And Ray lets him, of course. He doesn’t want the kid to feel trapped. But all of the boys’ behavior bothers him.

On the rare occasion they spend more than 2 seconds together Alex is really quiet. He won’t admit if Ray guessed wrong about a song and he doesn’t like it even though his body language makes it clear he’s not vibing with it. Actually, his body language pretty much just spells I am very uncomfortable in every situation where Julie or Carlos went to the bathroom or someone went to grab a snack and they’re alone even for 5 minutes while he’s visible.

Ray’s not stupid. He knows three 17-year-olds don’t end up getting their instruments left to their only living bandmate’s new best friend’s family by having good relationships with their own families.

He doesn’t exactly want to bring it up, but he kind of knows.

Then one day he’s sitting with all 3 boys watching a movie while he fixes something on his camera and Julie and Carlos are at school and he messes up a little part that means he has to start over (don’t @ me I know nothing about cameras) and swears out of frustration louder than he meant to.

He reaches for the screwdriver on the coffee table and

And Reggie and Alex both flinch.

Ray hadn’t even noticed they were tracking his movements, but while Luke seems to just have moved his focus from the TV to his friends in concern, Alex and Reggie both look too tense to play it off.

He figures its as good a time as any to have a chat cause these boys aren’t his sons but they don’t have anyone else acting as a parent figure to them and he feels the need to take care of them. He pauses the movie.

Ray: Can we have a talk? About you boy’s families?

Naturally Luke jumps in to try to distract him immediately, telling a story about his dad taking him fishing once, but he stops when Ray asks him to stop.

Ray: That’s not what I’m talking about and I think you all know it.

The boys are all still silent. Luke looks 500% ready to deflect again. Reggie and Alex look more like they’re expecting to get yelled at or worse.

Ray: I just want to help. I’ll drop it if you want me to but I want you to know that I would never do something to hurt any of you intentionally. You can talk to me about anything if you need to.

He means to make it an option of ‘you can talk but you don’t have to if you don’t want to,’ but the boys clearly don’t take it as such with how Luke starts talking immediately.

Luke: I ran away when I was 17. My mom and dad didn’t want me to stay in Sunset Curve, I think they thought it was going to get me into drugs or something.

They have a short talk about parents having good intentions not equalling them being right to push Luke so hard they pushed him away and it’s okay to feel hurt by that and then press play on the movie again and Ray thinks he sees all 3 boys relax somewhat during that.

A couple weeks later Reggie comes in visible and hesitantly asks about watching this series he saw when Carlos was scrolling through Netflix once.

Mid-episode he blurts out

Reggie: I don’t want to look for my parents and I feel weird about that.

He rambles for a while about knowing he was lucky that his family had money and his mom and dad told him they loved him and stuff but also he remembers so many fights between them where he felt caught in the middle and it never ended well if he chose a side but there was no way to win because they’d both turn on him if he didn’t so it was just this constant balancing act to try to prevent fights in the first place.

Reggie: I felt like I was walking on a tightrope. Like, all the time. I tried so hard to keep them from getting mad at each other or at me. Only it never worked and it was always a question of when they were going to snap next and it was confusing cause one day we’d go to the zoo and everything would be fine and the next they’d yell at me and send me to bed without food.

He feels guilty for not wanting to put in the effort to find them because he’s pretty sure on some level they did love him but he doesn’t want to see them again.

And he doesn’t want to know if they even miss him at all because when he got older and the fighting got too intense he would sneak off to Luke’s or Bobby’s and no matter if he stayed away for an hour or a couple days they never seemed to notice he was gone.

Ray listens and a lot of things about Reggie start to make sense. How he’s so careful not to catch him in a bad mood. How he shuts down whenever anyone raises their voice. How he helps out so much in an effort to stay on Ray’s good side.

It’s a day and a half after the latest show so they can’t really hug but Ray does what he can to provide comfort and validate his feelings anyway because damn Reggie is a good kid and he didn’t deserve that.

Reggie and Luke get more comfortable with coming to him for meaningful chats, or even just to vent about whatever’s going on lately.

Eventually they seem to feel almost as comfortable with him as Julie and Carlos do so it kinda becomes a routine.

Like Julie will ask for cuddles when she’s sad about missing Rose or she’ll walk in and vent about Carrie and Flynn being so obvious about liking each other but somehow not realizing it’s mutual and she and Nick are 3rd wheeling and going insane.

Carlos will excitedly ramble about his latest baseball practice shenanigans for an hour but also sometimes ask for someone to watch old home movies or listen to old CDs from Rose and the Petal Pushers with him.

And that’s normal. That’s been Ray’s life since his kids started talking. But the thing is that it’s just as normal when

When Luke tells how he’s still angry about his music getting stolen because it feels like a part of him was taken away and he worked hard on those songs. Also one day he very shyly admits

Luke: I like Julie a lot.

Ray: I know, kiddo.

Luke: You’re not mad?

Ray: As long as you two make each other happy, no. I’m happy for you.

And it’s just as normal when Reggie talks about missing his little cousin Kelsi and wondering where she ended up only for them to look her up and find out she’s a major Broadway writer/director now oh my god— and also

Reggie: I think I like boys. Like boys are cute. But I know I’m not gay because girls are cute too and ugh it’s confusing it’s probably nothing I guess everybody goes through this.

Ray: Have you ever thought you might be bisexual?

Reggie: Bi-what-now?

Ray, already digging out his old flannels that he would have passed down to Julie except they’re too big for her: It’s okay to like both, kiddo.

All this is great of course. It’s great how Reggie and Luke aren’t afraid anymore and they feel validated and seen and listened to.

But months have passed and Ray notices how Alex remains separate. He still avoids Ray when he can and stays quiet and cautious when he can’t.

Like Ray still senses Alex around him sometimes but never right after a show when he’s visible. He doesn’t come to him with problems. He’ll stay and listen when Ray plays a song he thinks he’d like, but he still seems so cautious and Ray doesn’t know how to help.

He asks Luke one day while he’s introducing him to a Wicked bootleg if he’s done something specific to scare Alex away.

Luke gets this really dark look on his face and he just

Luke: Let’s just say that my parents didn’t do everything perfectly, but they’re saints compared to Alex’s.

Ray decides to drop it, but Luke wants to reassure him.

Luke: You haven’t done anything wrong. He’s just not very comfortable around most adults in general. It’s one thing when we’re invisible, but...

Ray: I just wish I could help.

Luke: You do help. But it took a while for Alex to trust me.

The conversation ends there because Luke starts getting really into Defying Gravity.

But then that night Julie comes in with a kind of out of character movie request so Ray thinks Luke talked to her.

Because Julie does not like most romcoms that aren’t musicals. She gets bored. But she requests Love, Simon anyway.

Ray kind of sees what she’s trying to do there because now that he’s thinking about it the boys haven’t really seen many things with queer rep. Especially not queer main characters.

And nobody’s really told him that Alex is gay but cmon he’s an elder bi. He has accurate gaydar so he can support his queer ducklings.

Despite how the boys all know being gay is more socially acceptable now (they found out about Nick’s dads and the girls gave them the ‘gay marriage is legal now’ talk) they still seem kind of baffled by how there’s an entire romcom centered around a gay boy and it did well.

From there Ray tries to find more movies and tv shows with canon queer representation.

And he keeps giving Alex space but also trying his best to show him that he’s not like his parents.

For a long time nothing changes beyond Luke and Reggie getting increasingly comfortable with him.

Well that’s not completely true actually cause Reggie starts tagging along to photo shoots and becomes Ray’s unofficial mostly invisible assistant.

Then the band plays an amazing show and the boys stay visible for a full week.

Around the middle of that week, Ray goes out to the garage to find Reggie and see if he wants to come on a photo shoot.

Reggie isn’t out there but Alex is.

And he’s crying. Hard.

He looks like he’s going to poof out when he sees Ray there but Ray’s already 100% ready to do exactly what he always does when he walks in on Julie or Carlos crying.

Ray: Alex. Hey, buddy, it’s okay. I’m here. It’s going to be okay.

Alex freezes and it breaks Ray’s heart how that kind of concern is clearly not what he’s expecting.

Ray: Are you okay with being touched?

Alex looks kind of like he’s in shock but he nods.

He clearly doesn’t really know what to do with it but he kind of melts into it when Ray hugs him and he just sobs on his shoulder.

When he’s stopped crying enough he starts rambling about how he’s been looking everywhere but he can’t find Willie.

At that point he’s basically having a panic attack so finding out what’s wrong takes a backseat compared to calming him down and Ray knows how to do that because he and Rose used to do that for Trevor all the time.

Ray: Alex, breathe. In for 4 counts, hold for 7, out for 8. Breathe with me.

It takes a couple minutes until Alex has calmed down enough, but once he does, Ray asks what’s wrong and what’s happening with Willie.

He only vaguely knows who Willie is from what he’s been told by the other kids but he knows he’s important to Alex.

So Alex takes a deep breath and explains that Caleb confronted him and basically said the boys had to join his house band or he would make sure he’d never see Willie again. And he doesn’t want to ask his family to sacrifice themselves for him but he doesn’t want to lose the boy he loves either.

Ray wants to throw hands but from what the kids have told him about Caleb, he has a better idea.

Ray: Here’s what we’re gonna do, buddy. Reggie said Caleb has this super catchy number, The Other Side of Hollywood?

Alex: Yeah?

Ray: How quickly do you think Luke and Julie could come up with an arrangement for you four to cover that and how desperate do you think Covington would be to make sure a video of that never gets published without crediting him?

Alex: :o

Spoiler alert: Julie and Luke, in collaboration with Carrie, can come up with an arrangement very quickly.

They do a private performance of it and film it and basically blackmail Caleb into letting Willie go.

Willie has an empty house that used to be his parents’ that he still considers his so he mostly crashes there if he needs to. Also he loves skating around so much that he never stays in one place for very long.

Julie can see him but she can’t make him visible so it’s a little odd but Ray gets an orange pen for him for the whiteboard and he finds skateboarding videos and stuff for when he visits.

They eventually figure out that he can be part of the magic by adding him to the band so they give him a tambourine and yay now Willie can be seen but that’s later.

The biggest immediate change to come out of all this is Alex.

He’s not afraid of Ray anymore for the most part (healing isn’t linear and he can’t help a few bad days) and he starts actually talking to him. Not about serious stuff but he’s talking. Mostly just rambling about how Willie makes him feel or how Luke and Reggie have been being annoying lately.

Then one day he comes in really nervous and says something about Reggie saying he talked to Ray about his parents.

And Ray confirms it and asks if there’s anything Alex needs to tell him.

Alex sits down and clearly he’s been holding this in for a long time and he just unloads how he came out to his parents because his youngest sister found his diary and he was scared she’d tell them. They didn’t react well and when he cried out of fear and frustration his father... gave him something to cry about.

His father did that a few more times, trying to ‘make him man up,’ and Alex never told his bandmates but he always knew they could see the bruises and that was why Bobby made it so clear his garage was open and his house was a safe place to run.

But Alex didn’t no matter how bad things got because he guessed some small part of him thought he deserved it but mostly it was about how his oldest sister dropped out of college and ghosted the family and Alex was the next-oldest so he felt responsible for protecting his younger sisters even if they both had learned behaviors from their parents and hated him.

Then that summer he found out his parents were planning on sending him away to some Christian camp where they’d ‘fix’ him.

Alex made it clear that he wouldn’t go and if they tried to make him he’d run away, but their ultimatum was that he couldn’t live under their roof if he was gay.

So he didn’t. And it was a situation somewhere between getting kicked out and running away, but he packed a bag and never went back.

He ran to Bobby’s house, he wrote a whole bunch of angry songs, and he tried not to think too much about how he understood why his older sister left and how he was doing the exact same thing to his younger sisters.

By the time he’s done explaining everything Ray’s trying not to cry but Alex is definitely already crying mostly out of anger.

Alex: I hated them all. I hated Molly for leaving me and I hated my mom for turning my little sisters against me and I hated my dad for hurting me and I even hated Anna and Josie for not standing by me and I just hated them all so much. I still do. And it is so stupid that I feel guilty for that because they were terrible to me and I was 16 and I didn’t deserve that but I do feel guilty for it because they’re my family and I hate them.

Ray doesn’t have much to say because damn this is heavy stuff but he assures him that after what he went through he has a right to hate his blood family.

Alex tells him awkwardly when he’s calmed down a bit that Luke is the only other person he’s ever told about all this, because after he ran away they dated for a few months before figuring out that they were better as friends.

Reggie and Bobby guessed parts of it and Julie probably has too but none of them have asked and Alex thinks he might tell Reggie and Julie someday if it ever comes up but he never did end up telling Bobby.

Ray assures him that he won’t tell anyone and also that he would never do that. He would never do anything to hurt Alex or the others on purpose.

He makes a silent promise that no one will ever hurt one of his kids like that again and if Caleb or anyone else ever tries, they will regret it.

But anyway on to happier matters.

Willie visits a lot and he’s a little skittish around Ray but he loosens up after he jokingly mentions one time that Willie and Alex are like the beginning of the Sk8ter Boy song.

Alex and Ray might be Denim Jacket Buddies but once Ray digs his old leather jacket out of the closet he becomes Leather Jacket Buddies with Reggie.

You’d think he has to tell Carlos and Reggie off the most for breaking things but he doesn’t. It’s Carlos and Luke.

Also Ray doesn’t consider himself an overprotective dad but Julie and Luke are not allowed to be alone in a room with the door closed.

Neither are Alex and Willie technically but it’s harder to enforce it when they’re both ghosts.

Lmao all the kids follow the rules anyway because they love Ray and he’s not being unreasonable.

He helps Julie in her plot to get Carrie and Flynn together and also he helps Nick plan how to make a move on that cute boy on his lacrosse team.

Because Nick loves his dads but they’re disaster gays. Neither of those men can properly flirt. They fell in love because of a baseball rivalry and Nick doesn’t trust their advice.

Pride month rolls around and Julie makes sure to book a big gig the day before the parade so the boys will be visible and tangible.

Trevor’s on tour and can’t get away and Flynn’s parents are working and Nick’s are busy too so Ray finds himself escorting this whole little gaggle of various queer ducklings to pride.

Carlos isn’t quite sure what he is yet so he’s just got a rainbow flag painted on his cheek and a shirt that says I love my bi sister on it.

Julie’s all decked out in the bi colors, complete with ribbons braided into her hair and a flag to use as a cape. She made the tutu herself and it took her hours but it turned out really good.

Luke’s got a tank top with the pan colors and a trans flag as a cape and also yknow face paint of course.

Reggie browsed thrift shops everywhere until he found a flannel in the bi colors and he’s got that along with pink purple and blue laces in his combat boots and what Ray is really hoping is temporary dye and not spray paint in his hair.

Alex has a rainbow shirt that matches Willie’s and matching bracelets with Flynn. Also he painted rainbow hearts on his cheeks and put a lot of effort into them and they look really symmetrical.

Willie’s of course matching shirts with Alex and also he has sparkly rainbow socks and a flag to use as a cape.

Carrie’s got a whole ensemble in the lesbian colors complete with a pride wig and also matching necklaces with Flynn.

Flynn’s matching colors with Carrie but more in her style with of course matching jewelry with the people closest to her. She’s got friendship bracelets corresponding to Alex and Julie.

Nick’s got a pan tshirt and a fedora with a ribbon in pink yellow and blue plus face paint cause all of them have face paint. Nothing too crazy.

Meanwhile Ray’s got a bi bandanna and one of those shirts that’s like Free Dad Hugs.

Plus everyone did each other’s nails with varying degrees of success the night before and Julie did Ray’s so they turned out good.

Nick’s lacrosse buddies and the rest of Dirty Candi are around somewhere but they didn’t ride in the same car so they’re not that relevant.

They party. Celebrate being alive. Idk I’ve never gotten to go to pride.

And afterwards they all go back to the Molina house and the couch isn’t really big enough for all of them but it’s okay it’s not like they know how to sit correctly anyway.

They all kind of pile together and cuddle and watch movies until Flynn and Nick’s parents can come pick them up.

And Ray just looks around and realizes that

Sure only 2 of them are his biologically

And 3 of the others have good parent(s) who are actively a part of their lives

The remaining 4 are technically dead

But he has 9 children and he’s totally fine with that.

Cause he’s Ray Molina: best dad ever.

Victoria’s head is going to explode when she finds out that not only is the Molina house really haunted, but he’s adopted the ghosts.

37 notes · View notes

hurricanery · 3 years

Text

If You Went Away - pt. 2

A/N: Here’s part two of If You Went Away. You can read part 1 here. This is still pretty much angst but….I promise there’s light at the end of this tunnel. ALSO I want to explain in case anyone else was wondering 1) Amelink are not yet married in this 2) They have their own house in this story/they do not live at Meredith’s house like they currently do in the show. Hope that clears things up! Thanks so much for reading and sending encouraging messages it really means a lot <3

_______

(end of summer // present day)

“Amelia?” Maggie calls out as she pulls the spare key out of her sister’s front door lock. “Are you home?”

Silence.

She walks through the empty house, not failing to take in its current state. The piles of laundry not put away, dishes overflowing the sink, binders full of surgical notes and papers scattered across the kitchen table that are covered in Amelia’s messy handwriting.

She takes a look around the kitchen and notices the food that’s been left out, indicating that someone has recently been here. The food is perishable. So, Maggie decides to put things back in the fridge before they go bad. She frowns to herself as she notices the relative emptiness of the fridge.

She then searches through the practically empty cabinets, too. Before feeling like she’s doing too much prying. Pulling out her cell phone instead, she dials Amelia’s number.

To Maggie’s surprise, she hears a phone go off from somewhere upstairs.

_______

“Amelia,” Maggie enters her bedroom, where she discovers one sound asleep Amelia. “I’ve been trying to reach you all day. It’s like 2pm. What’s going on?”

There’s a pillow over Amelia’s head, and her only response is a muffled groan.

“Amelia.” Maggie says again, a certain harshness to her voice. Stepping around to the side of the bed, she rips the pillow away and tosses it aside.

Amelia immediately attempts to replace the pillow with her arms, not so successfully covering her head. “Maggie,” her voice cracks. “How’d you even get in here?”

“Spare key.”

Silence falls between them and Maggie just stares around the room. The curtains are pulled shut and the air is stuffy. There are a concerning amount of unfinished mugs of coffee and tea placed on every surface.

And then there’s Amelia, and her basically lifeless looking body, not even covered by any sort of bedding. The comforter happens to be in a pile on the floor. But she lay there anyway, in an oversized sweatshirt, hair an absolute mess, arms covering her head.

“Amelia,” Maggie says, all tough-love. No bullshit. “Get up. Get in the shower. I’ll make you coffee.”

_______

A solid half hour later and Amelia reluctantly rounds the corner into her kitchen. The sight of Maggie busying herself by cleaning the kitchen almost makes Amelia smile. Almost.

And Maggie’s heart clenches at the ounce of an expression.

Amelia looks rough, even after a shower. And that’s putting it lightly. The same oversized sweatshirt from before still covers her thin frame and Maggie can’t help but to notice the endlessly exhausted look in her eyes.

“There’s coffee, hun,” Maggie clears her throat, nodding towards the coffee-maker.

Amelia nods, and moves toward her cabinets, in search of a mug. “Thanks,” she murmurs, pouring herself a cup, not even bothering to add any creamer.

Maggie makes her way over to the kitchen table and Amelia follows suit, reaching forward to clear some of her books and papers out of the way.

“Sorry about the mess,” she mutters, stacking all of her surgical notes onto one side of the table.

She slowly takes a seat across from Maggie, her eyes not leaving her own hands, and the way her fingers wrap around the warm mug tightly. Her eyes sting unwillingly.

Ignoring the way her throat burns, she opens her mouth, attempting to persuade her sister that everything in this household is a-okay. “So, how’ve you been, Maggie? Been a while.” She lifts her stare and offers what she believes to be a smile.

Maggie stares back at her in disbelief. “Amelia,” she sighs. And Amelia pretends to be confused by her tone. “What is going on here?”

Amelia frowns, laughing under her breath. Her gaze shifts to the pile of surgical prep sitting on the table. “The spinal surgery,” she mutters, like it should be the most obvious thing in the world. “Maggie I’m prepping for an impossible surgery, I don’t know what you expect-”

“That’s not what I’m talking about.” She interrupts. “And to tell you the truth, I’m a little pissed.” Amelia looks like she’s ready to respond, but instead shuts her mouth closed, her teeth clamping together. Maggie’s tough act softens just slightly, along with her voice. “I’m your sister, Amelia, let me be here for you.”

“I don’t need…” She blinks, trailing off.

“Shut up, Amelia.” It doesn’t sound harsh at all, in fact it makes Amelia’s eyes sting out of pure gratefulness.

Despite her attempts to repress any emotion, Amelia huffs a deep breath and blinks upward, but fails to keep the moisture out of her eyes. “Maggie the summer just…. flew by.” She explains, trying to make sense of her own feelings. “And I….still feel like….why do I still feel like this?”

Maggie’s heart breaks at the tone of her voice. Tiny and pleading and desperate.

“Amelia, I love you. And I want to be here for you. But you have to let me. You have to answer my texts, my calls.….”

Maggie trails off, waiting for the brunette to interject, or for her to at least make eye contact. When she doesn’t offer any evidence that she’s listening, Maggie continues.

“Amelia, you can’t ignore the fact that they come home this week.”

Amelia’s eyes snap to hers and she nods, because she knows Maggie’s right. She’s been so wrapped up in this upcoming spinal surgery that she’s been refusing to process the fact that Link and Scout will be returning back home, to this household, any day now.

“I know, I…” Amelia sucks in a breath, glancing at the ceiling as she gathers her thoughts. “I just, I….gave myself all of this time. This entire summer...to think. And, and to….figure out how I feel and…”

She trails off and Maggie nods at her, encouraging her to continue.

“I didn’t figure any of it out,” she laughs bitterly. But there’s no humor in her words. The tears springing to her eyes provide a stark contrast. “And now they’re coming home and I don’t even know what we are.”

“You’re still a family,” Maggie offers, in a guarded whisper.

“Maggie he left,” Amelia’s voice cracks on the statement.

“Amelia…” Maggie frowns slightly at this, but ensures that the reality of her next words don’t sound harsh. “Amelia, if I can remember….you told him to go.”

“But I didn’t think he would listen!” The brunette yells harshly back, and the slight outburst surprises both of them.

“Sorry,” Amelia continues, an octave lower. “Yes, I told him to go. And yes….he went. And then…” her voice cracks itself even more and it’s heartbreaking to hear. “Maggie I made it so much worse. I let this happen. I...I created this distance and he went along with it and, and now,” the tears are openly rolling down her cheeks now. “I don’t know how to fix this.”

“I know it’s hard. I know.” Maggie reaches across the table for Amelia’s hand. “But it’s going to be okay.”

“I haven’t really spoken with him in months.”

“You FaceTime with Scout almost every day,” Maggie frowns.

“I mean Link,” she shudders slightly at the realization that she’s distanced herself completely. She makes time for Scout with every free moment she has. But when it comes to Link, and every time he’s asked to talk, just the two of them, she’s made up some excuse about surgery and how she has to prepare for her upcoming spinal cord tumor case.

“It’s going to be okay,” Maggie interrupts her thoughts.

“How can you say that?” Amelia questions, under her breath.

“Because you are going to get through this, okay?” She stares at Amelia until she finally agrees.

“Okay.”

“Good,” Maggie gives her hand a squeeze. “How about some pancakes?”

And Amelia finally smiles.

“I’m going to make you pancakes even though it’s…” She trails off, glancing at her watch. “Closer to dinner time now. And then,” She locks eyes with her sister pointedly. “We are going to clean this house up. Mkay?”

“Okay,” Amelia whispers, a genuine smile still waving across her features.

_______

She’s been preparing for the sound of his car in the driveway all day but when the distinct sound fills her ears, she’s still not ready. She sucks in a breath as she hears the car doors slamming shut. And the sound of her son’s cheerful voice, taking in how much more full and lively it sounds in person, compared to through the phone. The distant sound of Scout’s laugh from the driveway makes her heart swell and she still doesn’t feel prepared.

She occupies her mind by tidying up the living room. She folds a blanket while she listens to their voices get closer, as they approach the front porch. There’s not much else to do that can distract her from this moment. Or to slow it down. Because Maggie had already ensured that this house was spotless. And now Amelia has nothing to do with her hands except wring them together anxiously until the front door is swinging open.

And when it does her breath catches in her throat.

Because her baby is home and now he’s running towards her full force, without any inclination of her nervousness.

“Mommy!” Scout cries out as he leaps towards her, and at the same time Amelia is bending down and scooping him up into her arms. She squeezes him tight, her palm resting at the back of his head as she brings it to her chest, her head lowering to the top of his to inhale his presence completely.

“I missed you so much, baby,” she breathes, swaying back and forth and running her fingers through his dirty blonde hair.

Link stands in the doorway to the living room, a suitcase in each hand as he smiles at the sight in front of him. It’s an uncertain smile. One that doesn’t feel like it knows it’s place.

Amelia sets Scout down and Scout is immediately babbling to her in full force about the trip. He explains excitedly about the playoff games and how ‘Dad fixed all their bones’ and how they ‘won all the games because of their new bones.’

Amelia smiles tightly, too overwhelmed to even keep up with her son’s stories. Too overwhelmed because she can’t believe he’s even here, in front of her. She crouches down to be equal to Scout’s height, squeezing his shoulders and just taking in his face as he stands in front of her.

“Oh, wait!” Scout yells enthusiastically. “We brought you something!”

Scout runs towards his Dad and Amelia finally takes a moment to glance in Link’s direction. The uncertainty on his face mirrors her own. But then Link looks away from her, as their son approaches him. He’s reaches into their luggage, handing something to Scout. Scout takes it and runs back to Amelia, where she’s still kneeling at Scout’s height in the middle of the room.

He excitedly hands her something and Amelia looks down at it. It’s a baseball. She chuckles and turns it over in her hands.

“That’s my ball, Mom,” Scout explains. “I got to throw the first pitch at the last game! I did! And that’s the ball that I threw!”

Amelia laughs wholeheartedly at her son as he bounces up and down with excitement.

“And look!” Scout points towards the baseball. “I signed it for you too!”

Amelia turns the ball over to see that Scout did, in fact, write his own name across it in permanent marker. The grin that crosses her features feels foregin, like she hasn’t smiled so genuinely like this in months. She doesn’t realize the tears that are springing to her eyes until Scout points them out.

“Mommy, are you crying?”

She wipes under her eyes quickly and laughs. “No, sweetie. I’m not crying.”

“Did I make you sad?” Scout looks genuinely concerned.

“No, no,” Amelia pulls Scout into her arms again, sighing deeply. “I’m just so happy to see you.”

Scout starts to squirm in her tight embrace and Amelia finally pulls away, taking another deep breath.

“Aren’t you going to hug Daddy, too?”

Amelia’s heart sinks at the question. She glances at Link, who still stands near the front hallway, where he’s been organizing their luggage. He awkwardly runs a hand through his hair.

Amelia stands on shaky feet, biting her lip. And then she feels a small hand wrap around her wrist, and she’s being pulled lightly across the room.

She doesn’t fight it. She let’s Scout pull her toward the front door. And then she’s standing right in front of Link. And the eye contact is making her heart race.

Scout stands between them, head shifting back and forth as he looks at each of them in question.

“You guys are acting funny.”

Amelia chuckles. And the look Link gives her represents both of their surprise at their son’s own wit.

Link shrugs. And then he’s giving Amelia another deliberate expression, as if he’s warning her that he’s about to make this decision for the both of them.

He reaches forward and pulls her into a hug, and Amelia gasps into his chest. His arms wrap around her shoulders and hers automatically go to his sides.

Her pulse quickens as she inhales his scent. She hasn’t had any contact like this in months and it feels so out of her realm.

“You good?” Amelia barely hears him mumble into her hairline. It’s quiet enough that Scout doesn’t hear it.

Amelia nods into his chest and steps out of his embrace, dropping her hands away from his sides and watching his face fall.

She rips her gaze away from him and turns her attention to their son standing between them, smiling tightly. “Why don’t you put your stuff away, Scout?”

“Yeah, bud,” Link chimes in. “We have a lot of stuff to unload. Let’s leave your Mom alone for a minute.”

Scout nods, following after his Dad as he moves towards their pile of luggage. Link hands Scout a duffle bag before he fills his own arms with what he can carry.

Amelia watches on as the two climb the stairs, Scout chatting again about practicing his baseball pitch. She stifles a laugh at her son’s ability to fill each moment with words. He had to have gotten that trait from her.

She stands alone in the front hallway and glances upwards as she pays attention to their movement upstairs. She can hear Scout’s quick movements in his own bedroom. And she can hear footsteps enter the other bedroom, their bedroom, too. Luggage gets set down heavily above and Amelia swears she can hear Link’s sigh even from a floor apart. And in a way, she mirrors the tired sound, exhaling slowly.

_______

Amelia blinks heavily as she sits at the kitchen table, she tears her eyes away from the notes in front of her to glance at the clock. 11pm.

The coffee in her hands should help her stay awake for at least 3 more hours. She’s been staring at the same scans on her laptop for what feels like forever. The updated spinal cord scans don’t exactly provide her with any inclination of how to move forward in her tumor removal approach and she groans impatiently.

“Scout’s finally asleep,” Link’s voice completely startles her as he rounds the corner into the kitchen and she almost drops her coffee. “Oh, sorry,” he mumbles.

Amelia watches him as he moves about the kitchen, preparing himself a tea.

“It’s hard to get him to stop talking sometimes,” Link adds. “He basically talks himself to sleep.”

“I know how that goes,” Amelia mumbles, thinking about the amount of times Link has teased her for falling asleep literally mid-sentence.

Link takes in Amelia’s current position, hunched over at the table surrounded by scans and notes and halfway consumed caffeine.

“Gonna be a long night for you?” He questions.

“Uh, yeah.” Amelia glances away from her work momentarily. “I just got these updated scans and I….I have to re-think everything basically,” she bites her lip out of habit. “So yeah, basically a long night for me.”

Link nods slowly. He knew she had a lot on her plate right now, but he didn’t exactly know the extent of it.

“You should get some sleep,” Amelia adds. “You’ve been travelling all day.”

“Yeah, I was going to,” He glances toward the stairs, thinking about bed. Their bed. The bed he hasn’t been in for over a year now. “I was going to head up there.”

Amelia just nods. Not sure what else to say.

“You going to be okay down here? Need anything?” Link glances at the disorganized mess that is the kitchen table.

“Yeah, yeah,” Amelia quickly responds. “I’m good, I just….really need to focus.”

“Right,” Link mutters, moving towards the doorway with his tea in his hands. “Okay.” He takes one final look at Amelia before he exits the kitchen and she meets his eyes respectfully.

“Okay,” she offers back. She turns back to the notes in front of her and holds her gaze there until she hears the sounds of Link’s footsteps ascending the stairs.

_______

The first thing Link thinks when he wakes up the next morning is that he’s way too comfortable. He’s not used to this bed anymore and the mattress feels way too soft. He’s way too comfortable and the bed feels way too big. And that’s because it’s mostly empty. The space beside him is cold and bare and he clutches the emptiness before rolling over completely.

He frowns as he rests his feet on the floor, standing up and throwing a sweatshirt on as the morning chill hits his body.

He’s still blinking the sleep from his eyes as he descends the stairs, turning the corner into the living room.

When his eyes finally focus, they land on Amelia. Where she’s passed out, sound asleep on the couch. She’s still wearing the clothes she’d worn yesterday, like all she had done was move from the kitchen table to the couch at some point last night without getting ready for bed.

Link grimaces at the idea that she hadn’t come upstairs to her own bedroom to get ready for sleep. The frown deepens as he tries to push away the thought that it was because of him. His fault that she was down here on the couch and he was up there in a too big and too comfortable bed. He walks forward, and a shiver takes over his body. The early September air already unbearable.

When he reaches the couch he leans forward and grabs a blanket from the corner. He drapes it over Amelia as she sleeps and she doesn’t even stir at the slight disruption.

Link only watches her sleep for another moment before he backs away, uncertain where to go next.

_______

#amelink #amelink fanfic #amelinkfic #amelia shepherd #atticus lincoln #maggie pierce #amelia x link #amelinkfanfiction #my writing #if the sun comes up #greys anatomy fanfic #grey's anatomy fanfic #grey's anatomy fic

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vintage-brass-tc · 3 years

Text

4/15-16/2021

((THIS IS SO LATE — I blame the incoming exams))

Okay, wow! These two days were PACKED with moments!! I’ll try to give an overall summary of the ones I’m thinking most about. Super hard to pick which ones to write here!! 😳😳

Apologies in advance for the super long post once again! I just get carried away with these things.

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I was assigned to play something for W one morning before school. I was pretty nervous about it, so I decided to arrive thirty minutes before my time slot to give me time to practice.

After I stopped and got my stuff together to go inside, I noticed that a stunning vehicle was moving up to the left of me. It slowly rolled through the rows of other vehicles until it found an open parking space. The car then began to adjust so it could park trunk-first into the open spot.

I looked inside the wonderful car as it was almost done moving backwards, and I could not believe what I saw. Another pair of eyes were already looking at me....and they were W’s.

He seemed to share the same bewildered expression as my own. We stared at each other for two seconds until I forced my head away from his direction. I allowed myself to think.

Just then, I processed how I had arrived the same time W did. I wasn’t sure why, how, or what caused this coincidence, but I was sure that I was going nuts over it. Haha. Maybe the universe was scheming.

I called out to W as he traveled towards the door, asking him when it was okay for me to come in. He replied with a sweet tone and an even sweeter smile. “You can come in whenever you want!!”

I thanked him, got my stuff together, and sped to the (now open) door, all while remaining a good distance away from him.

Flash forward to playing the music for W. It was definitely something, let me tell you that much.

He walked in and shut the door behind him before turning his head around. “Hey R!!” He quickly shot me a wild look. “Are you ready?”

I scoffed at his jubilant attitude— which he mocked for a bit— and then got started after answering some minor questions he asked about the piece.

Having W standing behind me as I played was terrifying. 😂 I could see him clearly through the reflection of my instrument, and it was VERY hard to focus because of this.

He was moving along with the piece and taking it in the whole time. It was like he flowed with the piece, essentially. Whenever I would make a mistake, he would freeze and kind of snap back into reality.

On the subject of messing up, he stopped me quite a bit during random segments of the song to give out extra tips he had. Every time he would do this, he would step up and lean forward to the right of me. My head would be at just about the level of his chest.

This close proximity revealed to me that W’s breath smells sweet, and slightly of mint. <3 Especially when he‘d sing to me.

He sang a lot of my parts when giving feedback, and these examples, perfect or not, demonstrated what he wanted. As much as I really do adore his singing voice, 90% of the time he couldn’t hit ANY of the correct notes.

He said I was making fun of his singing voice because I was laughing so much. Really though, I was only laughing at how close we were, his volume, his expression, his dramatic dynamic range, his notes that were WAY off . . . okay. Maybe I was making fun of him just a little bit.

When we were finished, he stopped abruptly at the door and praised me right before leaving the room. “Great job, R!”

I smiled and quickly said I didn’t mean to make fun of his singing. He stopped slightly and replied, “MMmm suure, it’s fine!” before popping out to continue doing his work.

I love it when he says my name in a positive light. It’s really special to me.

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Instead of helping A as I would usually do earlier in the day, I got to assist W this time. As you have probably guessed, there are quite a few things that happened. Kind of hard to choose what to put here. 😳

I sat down on a chair next to the kids W was teaching to play along with them as an example sound. W seemed to really love having his gaze linger on mine when he signaled the other tubas to play alongside me.

At one point, he repeatedly shot long, focused glances at me when everyone was playing as a group. I met his look with a challenging one, and he seemed hesitant, as if he wanted to say something.

There were slight moments he looked away to cue others in, but most of the time his eyes were on me. I considered setting my instrument down in case he didn’t want me to play, but I pushed the idea to the side.

When we finished the rep, he told me to help someone with one of their stands, as it was falling down. I suppose I knew then why he looked at me, but I couldn’t help but wonder.

Why would he stare so long to ask me something so simple?

Two other memorable things that popped up during this period took place when W began telling his instrument jokes. He told a tuba joke that had a silly punchline making fun of the little notes tubas would stereotypically play.

I laughed pretty loudly at this despite hearing it from him two to three times before, and he gazed at me with a grin. “R’s laughing because she knows it’s true.” “Ye(hehe)ah,” I chuckled a little more and returned his look with additional nods.

Soon afterwards, he began to ramble. He mentioned that the tubas should get used to seeing while notes because this was basically their “whole life”. This ridiculous but true statement made me smile and shake my head to myself.

W THEN MOCKED ME A SECOND TIME. “R’s like—” he mimicked a person laughing, which gradually turned into crying. (His acting was actually on point though, both vocally and expressively.) I began to cackle excessively because of the imitation.

When the end of class arose and the bell rang, I stayed behind to help make sure the students packed up and left on time. Of course, in exchange, this cost me my own time, which, in hindsight, I should have thought more about in the moment.

I left the room to check if the kids in another area needed help for any reason, then came back to retrieve my stuff so I could leave.

Just in time, when I was walking back towards the entrance of the main band room, W was making his way to walk out. Our gazes locked and he stopped in place.

His left arm outstretched to hold one of the doors while his right was curved to pick up the door-stopper. His body was tilted and his legs were slightly bent to reach the bottom of the door.

I slightly lifted my eyelids at him as a greeting, and he looked back at me with curiosity. When I walked closer to him, slowing down about five or so feet away, he lifted his left eyebrow and smirked at me, seemingly amused.

I felt my brows begin to furrow at his teasing look. “Forget something?” He asked me. “Yeah, my stuff…(it’s in there) . . .” I smiled at him as I inched a little closer. “Oh.”

His face lost the smug expression and instead returned to its usual wonder-filled state. It took a few seconds of looking at me before he realized he was blocking the entrance. I mean, I could have used the other door, buuutttt I forgot about that. Whoops.

He scrambled to get up and hold the door open for me. I giggled at his frantic actions and smiled before thanking him sheepishly. After that happened, I walked to get my stuff, then put it on an empty chair in the room.

While I was packing my mouthpiece and stuff into my bag, W had walked back in at some point. He decided to take the spot on the table in front of me.

I turned to him, “Did the bell already ring?” “Yep,” He answered. “Ahh,” I breathed, facing my belongings once again, “I’m going to be late!”

W paused and looked up from the laptop in his hands, to my direction. “Do you need a pass?” He asked kindly, making me smile. “No thank you, I should be fine.”

“Is your teacher strict about tardies?” He continued the small talk inquisitively. “Oh, no, they’re not, don’t worry.” “Okay,” he muttered, sort of relieved(??). “At least, not with me,” I added.

He acknowledged my statement and I stood there for a good few extra seconds while contemplating.

I took my bag, swung it over my shoulder, and moved over to W. He looked extra confused looking up and spotting me again, haha. He was only sitting still, probably unsure of what to do.

“Uh—” “I decided I’m just going to get a pass (tardiness excuse slip) anyway, just in case.” He nodded approvingly at me. “Good choice.”

After setting his laptop down beforehand, he moved with me to a back table and grabbed a yellow sticky note. He then put it on a music stand. I walked him through my teacher’s name, but that’s it. He did everything else on his own..

I thought that it was cool he knew how to spell my name and stuff. I also got to see his messy handwriting, which is always lovely as well.

After he finished, I took hold of the note and thanked him for his help before going off to class, smiling the whole way there.

Lastly, W WOULD NOT stop letting the tubas play throughout the majority of the period. He showered us with compliments since we were sounding really good, and it was just amazing.

I always loved the way W looked at me when I was doing something right. It’s so validating. I love him a lot. ❤️

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Whew! That was fun. Not sure why this took a week, but ah well, hope you all enjoyed it nonetheless!

If I start posting about this week right after I publish this one— which I probably will— don’t worry about it. Just rambling as always. ^^

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candymeowz · 3 years

Note

MEOWZ!! 🤣🤣🤣 Your tags made me laugh!!

You wanna know what's my original idea for that oneshot??

(Excuse my messy handwriting because I was in a rush before the inspiration's gone.)

But when I'm writing it for the first time, I realised, "Wait wait wait... This is turning into crack real quick! Go back go back go back!!!"

And so you got the final edition :3

But yeah, I originally want you to be mad at him before he comforts you 🤣🤣🤣

😭😭😭 No but like the reason I wanted cuddles is because he didn't come home in the first place!!! I feel like I should be sulking at him, but he's my fav character and honestly it's hard for me to stay mad at anyone, let alone a fictional character~

AAHHHHH THAT IDEA SEEMED SO FUNNY! And I relate to the 'go back go back go back' on a spiritual level right now. I keep changing to second person's p.o.v in a third-person p.o.v fic I'm currently writing. 😭 the fact that that is considered your messy handwriting is just, like, my sis, MY MESSY HANDWRITING AIN'T EVEN READABLE.

Also, are requests still open? I wanna request for the other members of the SN trio 👉👈

#meowz talks #han 🍊🍭

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valmalfoy · 4 years

Note

Hello, honey! I saw the requests were open) Would you like to write Young!Sirius x reader With reader being optimistic everything, calm, A-Student, and Sirius mildly despises her, because she’s too “perfect”, but she’s friendly. But than something happens to him, she helps him to calm down, he snaps at her, because she wouldn’t ever know what’s that like, but turns out she has actually been through the similar situation, so she taught herself to see the good sides? I hope u like it 🤍🤍

Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader

Warnings: angst, jealous sirius ;), mad sirius but an all around fluffy ending.

A/N: I absolutely adore Sirius Black and couldn’t wait to write this one. I made this based in autumn and the reader is a slytherin (because I love cross house relationships and I thought it’d make the feud between them a bit more interesting.) Enjoy and as always thank you for requesting! <3

Y/N was a perfect student. Perfect grades, excelling in every class she attended and she made it look so effortless. Everything came to her so easily in class. They could be studying one of the hardest subjects at hogwarts at she’d make it look as easy as flying a broom when really it felt like trying to catch a rather difficult golden snitch. She was also undoubtedly gorgeous, nobody could dispute that. Her most striking feature always catching the eyes of boys from all the houses. But above all, she was kind. Which some found odd considering her house, the house of the cunning. Always offering to help that first year find their way to class or Gryffindor with a tricky question. She was one that could be unforgettable. You know, the type that you could walk past on the street and not know a single thing about them and daydream about your future with her. And to his friends disbelief, Sirius despised her. They could never pinpoint why because he always seemed to bring her up when he returned to the Gryffindore common room or during class when she was simply writing notes down on parchment paper.

“If you hate her so much, then explain to me why she is always on your mind.” James whispered to Sirius with his arms crossed and eyebrows knitted together. Sirius glared at his friend, trying to focus on the notes that Professor Mcgonagall read to the class rather quickly.

“How could you even ask that question, Potter.” James put his arms up in a surrendering position.

“Merlin, sorry.” James mumbled, “Didn’t know it was such a touchy subject.”

“It’s not a touchy subject. I would like to focus on my notes, please.” Sirius hunched over his parchment paper and continued to scribble out his messy handwriting.

“It must be because every girl would do anything at will just go get a glance from you but she won’t even look your way or acknowledge you.” James said with a sigh before leaning back into his chair. Sirius’s head whipped to look at Potter with his jaw hanging.

“I’m not even going to entertain what you just said, James.” Sirius warned before earning a quiet laugh from James. Sirius’s eyes drifting to across the classroom where Y/N quietly wrote. He noticed that whenever she was focused on something, she’d tap her foot under the desk quietly. He wondered if it were a specific song she’d tap it to or it was something she did absentmindedly. Sirius shook the thought of and continued with his notes.

It wasn’t until a couple weeks later that he’d speak to the girl that everyone knew of for the first time.

It was when the leaves had shifted from a green to red, yellow and orange. The sky turning a warm grey color and the weather got colder, everyone wearing wool sweaters now instead of cotton t-shirts. And much to Sirius’ notice, other students started receiving letters, clothes and packages full of everything fall from their families back at home. Writing about how they missed their company during this season. And just like every other year that Sirius attended hogwarts, he never received anything from his parents. Sirius knew exactly why and so did his friends. He wasn’t like his family. He never exactly fit in during family dinners, oh and let’s not forget he didn’t carry on a long line of tradition by sorting into the house of slytherin. So this time of year was rather difficult for him. He never understood the joy of autumn.

One breezy morning in the great hall, Sirius sat with his friends at the Gryffindor table. He watched as the excitedly teared into packages and read their letters from family. Sirius quietly excused himself from the table although he was sure his friends wouldn’t notice he was gone with all of the goodies that laid in front of them. But a certain girl watched him leave in a hurry and out to one of the courtyard’s. He often came out here to relax, listening to the leaves crunch under his shoes and get some fresh air. But today he simply sat on a bench and did his best not to lash out.

“Sirius Black, is it?” A calming voice was heard only a couple feet away from him. When he looked up from his lap his breath was caught in his throat when his gaze fell upon Y/N Y/L/N. And for an endless moment their eyes met.

“What’s it to you.” He nearly growled.

“Mind if I sit?” She asks. And if Sirius could describe her voice it would be as sweet as honey and as soft as silk. Although, he’d never admit that.

“Out of all the benches you choose this one?”

“Please.” How could he said no, she was being polite about it.

“Right then.” Sirius said before scooting over on the bench. “What does the golden girl want?” He snapped, earning a confused gaze from her.

“Here.” She reached into her bag and pulled out a letter, sealed with with a green wax.

“I don’t want your pity.” He said just not yet taking the letter from the girl.

“Believe me, I know that.” She shook her head looking down at the letter. “But I also know that you don’t receive letters from your parents.”

“How did you-?” He tried to say but he was quickly cut off.

“It’s easy to pick out the people that are like yourself.”

Sirius scoffed at her words, “As if you’re anything like me. You’re absolutely perfect and i’m well.. not.”

“I am so far from perfect.” She shrugged, still holding tightly onto the letter so the small breeze would not carry it away. “I don’t receive letters from my family either.”

“You don’t?” Sirius asked in disbelief.

“My parents are hufflepuffs. I wish I could’ve seen the look on their faces when they found out I was sorted into Slytherin. They say they don’t mind but I haven’t gotten a letter since my third year.” She laughed at the last bit. “Holidays aren’t so fun either. But I tend to look on the good side of things.” Y/N held the letter out to Sirius before he hesitatly took it. She stood up from the bench, pushing her hands into her coat picked before smiling as a signal of an wordless goodbye. She turned on her heels and headed into the warmth of the Hogwarts school.

As soon as she was gone, Sirius carefully opened the letter and began to read:

“Dear Sirius,

Your friends care about you a lot more than they tend to lead on. I will say I was quite shocked to hear of your sudden interest in my whereabouts in the school. But besides the things you’ve said about me, your friends brought to my attention that you were never really close with your family. James’ somehow knew about my situation as well and no matter what I say will not tell me how he got this information.. He thought that maybe if we talked that we could resolve this conflict you have towards me and that you’d find something in me to relate to.

While I may not be a close relative or someone you particularly like, i’ve decided to write you letters so you don’t look so left out. You don’t have to say they’re from me either. Because how embarrassing would that be, right? I guess it doesn’t matter, so do what you will with my letters.

Sincerely,

Y/N Y/L/N.”

With a smile now growing a permanent home Sirius’ face, he tucked the letter deep into his pocket so as it not to fall out when he walked back into the school. Maybe Y/N wasn’t so bad after all.

#sirius black imagine #the marauders #sirius black x reader #sirius black #young!sirius black #young!sirius black imagine #young!sirius black x reader #autumn #requests #valmalfoy requests #harry potter

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robots-and-writing · 3 years

Text

The Road to Ruin (MTMTE Sunder part 3)

(TW: Needles, Surgery, blood, mind control, yandere, mentions of human experimentation)

Sunder left his beloved's room, human blood staining his hands. His room is directly beside it, and in the corner is a hole where he has a perfect, one way view of his dearest. Their set up is the same as last time, except this time a note is set on their chest. It's handwritten, in his scratchy yet legible handwriting.

"To my dearest most beloved little angel,

My dear, you've been out for a day after those nasty decepticons attacked us. I fended them off but they managed to injure you. I've dressed and bandaged your wounds and I will be back soon with some food and some clothes for you.

Your dearest Conjunx,

Sunder"

It was a messy letter, with a small bloodstain on the corner. But it would serve its purpose well. He checked his human supplies for anything he may be lacking. Blood transfusions ready to go in case of any injuries, water, food, and clothes. There was still more to get but the human would have to wait for them to arrive.

Sunder looked over to the altar dedicated to his beloved. Pictures of them adorned his walls, along with their name all over the walls written in energon. The altar had little keepsakes of them. One of their shirts he had stolen, a lock of their hair and a vial of their blood were his favorites. But his favorite thing of theirs? A recording. Taken without their knowledge back on earth, they had a lover there. They confessed under a tree to their old flame, and Sunder's spark broke in two at that moment. But one good thing came of that confession. A recording of his little angel, saying "I love you, more than anyone else. Despite your flaws and despite mine, we are meant to be."

Those words tasted like the most delicious memories, like the sweetest energon, and like the greatest victories. They repeated in his mind 24/7, and were what motivated him to continue on when it came to keeping as sane as he could be without them by his side.

But despite his best efforts, Sunder couldn't handle being without them. Seeing them with another person made his brain swim with thoughts of violence. He should use his powers to tear that wretched other human to shreds. But something made him stop himself.

What if my dear hates me?

Sunder wasn't exactly the friendliest looking cybertronian. Tall, broad and scary, with spikes and pointy bits sticking out of him, most humans would run away in terror. (Before being torn apart of course.) But after a few human experiments, his idea was made possible. Mnemosurgery works on humans. Not from a distance, that requires a brain module. But it could be done.

His first experiments were unsuccessful. Too many needles meant a full lobotomy and possibly making them brain dead. Too few needles and the results were more temporary and a much more thorough "coding" would be necessary. Some of them bleed out due to him accidentally hitting a major artery. Some starved as he didn't feed them right. And some couldn't handle being an experiment, so they threw themselves off the workbench onto the ground, committing suicide. It was a delicate balance.

At first he didn't want to alter his beloved too much. Just make them despise other humans. Then he realized that would just make them miserable. So then he wanted to make them like him. But that would be too easily undone. He had to go full in. Make him their guardian angel. Make him the only one they feel safe with. He is the only one they will ever love. He is what stops the universe from killing them.

Getting the human was a challenge. He could do it himself but that would run the risk of alerting the other Autobots to his presence and imprisoning him again. He could do something the humans called "Catfishing" but that requires patience. And that is not something he has ever had enough of. He finally settled on a bounty hunter. 10 million shanix, as long as not a hair on his precious human's head is harmed.

He got a ping from a famous bounty hunter. He had the human. "Rendezvous at the coordinates and bring the shanix." Sunder did, and the human was finally in his grasp. Kicking and scratching at his hand, they were a wild and untamed thing. Taking the human back to his ship he pet them gently on the head, far more gentle than he ever had been.

"Who are you? Why was I taken here? Are you going to kill me? I thought Autobots didn't harm us?" He only smiled.

"Are you even listening to me? I'd at least like to know if I'm going to die? Are you really just going to keep on petting me like some pet-"

"You're home now darling. And soon, you'll be whole. We're two sides of the same coin."

"Uh- WHAT? I have a partner, and I love them very much! Besides I don't even know who you are, now put me down before you break my arm or something?"

He deposited the human in a large glass enclosure, with a bed, sink and bathroom and a cup on the side of the sink.

"Is this... an enclosure? Am I a pet to you? Excuse me but I'm a person with a life to live, rent to pay, and a partner to love! I'm not for your sick entertainment!"

Sunder only looked at them with wonder and glee, like a kid on Christmas. He spoke in a spine-tingling, nerve-wracking voice, as if Satan himself was speaking through him.

"You my dear, are a unique creature. Small and insignificant in stature, yet bigger than anything in existence." His words did nothing to soothe them as he leaned in so close his eyes reflected their face like a mirror. "Humans are so short lived, yet manage to reek of sin. Even you! With your small head, and tiny little legs, you have managed to commit the worst atrocity of them all!"

"What did I do?"

"You promised yourself to someone other than me."

Sunder tilted his head in a way that was probably trying to get a better look at them but only brought tears of panic to their eyes.

"I don't- I don't understand! I don't think I deserve to die!"

"Kill you?" The confusion in his voice was true. Had his intent not come through clear with his words? "My dear! You are sorely mistaken. I am your Conjunx! Your other half! Or as humans put it, your husband?"

"HUSBAND!? Sir I hardly know you! And even if I did know you, I already have a boyfriend and I love him more than I will ever love you."

The hand Sunder had on the edge of the clear box the human turned to a fist, shards of glass bursting everywhere. It cut into the human and they hurriedly put their arms in front of themselves to protect their face.

"Now now. That walking pile of sin is far far away now. And there is nothing more you have to do with him."

"But-"

"You're bleeding darling. And while your blood would taste delicious, I can't afford to have you fall unconscious or worse."

Reaching for them with the hand that didn't have glass shards sticking out of it, he held them firmly in his hand and took them to a corner of the room that had medical supplies. Sunder pinned them to the table as they thrashed around with blood dripping everywhere. One limb at a time, he picked the pieces of glass out of them and dressed and bandaged the wounds. Judging by the screams of pain the human made, it stung terribly. Then Sunder moved them to the medical bed and strapped them to it and moved on to cleaning off their face. He patched them up with expert precision as they cried out hoping someone would rescue them.

"Hello? Anyone? Please, someone help me! This can't be happening to me!"

"You speak as if anyone will ever rescue you."

The human finally stopped moving and let Sunder work as his words set in. No one will ever come for them. No one will ever save them. Ever. Ever. Ever.

The human didn't even react anymore to the sting of the cleaning of their wounds. Nor when he set them in his hand, this time loosely and just sat there petting them with a look of wonder and some sick form of love. For once, his mouth was closed.

Sunder looked back on the next two days as a time where he had what he thought he always wanted, but had been in denial of one fundamental truth. Having his beloved is meaningless if he isn't their beloved. Sure they didn't resist his petting, or him telling them all about the last person he ate the memories of. But they never reacted. They only drank when he forced water in their mouth. His dearest didn't even eat and became lethargic and entirely nonresponsive. That's when he knew. It's time for you to be perfect.

That was also the day he realized he had been conned. He woke up and they were gone. All that was left of them was a fresh bloodstain where he had broken the glass a few days ago. The vent nearest to the glass box was open as well, meaning they had truly escaped. Sunder cursed himself and his oversight. But now he had a human to catch.

The first place he checked was his room. And sure enough, there was a stack of boxes the human must have climbed down and the door was open. They must be terrified. If they stayed with me they would be worry free. And they were terrified. Straining his audials, he heard a faint and distant whimpering from a hallway further down.

"Oh dear human, why do you feel the need to run?" He put his hand around the corner of the hallway, just to hear their muffled gasp. "With me, you will never feel any shame from your sinful memories, and you will have eternal happiness by my side."

Now backed into a corner, they stood strong and tall, looking him in the optics with nothing but pure revulsion at him.

"Sunder, eternal happiness by your side? How is that possible?" His hand dented the wall unconsciously. Their words hurt, but he was not surprised. "You tore my family to bits, kidnapped me and forgot to give me anything but water for 3 days! I could never be happy with you."

Yes. It's time now my dear. Now It's time for you to be perfect. He didn't bother trying to hide his smile as he reached his hand towards them. There was no trying to escape him now, they were cornered.

Back in the present, Sunder had been scrawling mortilus' name on the walls in the blood of his beloved. The walls had been written over multiple times, in both blood and energon which made his entire room smell of rust. He checked on the human one more time before going into recharge.

#heed the trigger warnings #mtmte #idw #mtmte sunder #maccadam #transformers #sunder #yandere #my writing

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oh-sweet-mama · 3 years

Text

Lonely (VI)

T.W - talk of self harm, talk of suicide

3 weeks later 7 days until the full moon Remus

The feeling of my shoulder blades cutting into my ribs, just added to the feeling of the dulcet ache that seemed to consume me.

3 weeks. 3 fucking weeks. Y/n can't stand to be in the same room as me. Let alone my D.A.D.A partner, but she somehow tolerates it.

Fully cooperating with the work we have to do, like a royal servant. Matching purple under eye bags adorned both of our faces, but somehow made her more eternal.

Over the weeks she had slowly stopped coming to the meals at the great hall, and the effects were starting to show. Her cheek bones were becoming more prominent on her face, and her usually rosy color, long faded away.

The usual radiant y/c/e's faded away to leave a monotone grey. She seemed so fragile, like a Porcelain doll, if only I had treated her that way.

So fuckin' stupid Remus.

A note hit my forehead and landed in front of me.

Keep staring at her like that she'll end up with two holes In the side of her head.

S.B

Recognizing the messy handwriting, before even finishing the note, I immediately knew who it was.

The feeling of tears pricked the sides of the eyes, but I ran out of tears to cry long ago. Instead the feeling of a dulcet ache in the chest replaced the physical show of emotions.

6 days until the full moon Y/n

My shitty diet consisted of Tea, cigarettes, and what ever my friends brought me back to the dorm. Of course I tell them that I'm not their responsibility, but they still bring me the occasional muffin or biscuit.

James brought me entire meals, of which I could barely consume the entire thing.

You have to do it you have to tell him.

No. No I couldn't. I can't risk losing someone else. He would hate me if I ever told him. Send me to the ministry, report me to Dumbledore, hell I'd get kicked out of Hogwarts.

I still maintain physical hygiene and grades. The two most important things. Can't smell and can't fail.

The ache in my chest was never there, maybe it had to do with the fact that I'm always high enough to fend it off.

First tip, the best way to get over someone, get all the emotions out, get numb, act like it never happened.

Easy, right? No. You can't just act like it never happened, he was all I had, all I'll ever have.

I just wasn't good enough.

I stopped going to parties, instead focused on my studies. One of the best in my class.

'Y/n what's your secret?'

'I don't know, uh drugs? Heartbreak? Both?'

5 days until the full moon Remus

The increasing uncomfortable pressure on my joints was almost enough to distract me from her. Almost.

I just want to run up to her and tell her everything, drag Sirius, and make him confess too. Maybe we'll all be happy together.

The imagine of the three of us happy together and in love. Clouded my head. I thought about it so much it was almost tangible.

Her daily routine trips to Madam Pompfrey had me assuming the worse. I had my fare share of bandaging up Sirius' forearms and upper thighs.

I tried to think, her period maybe? No, she's had hers for years, she would just excuse herself to the toilet.

My mind just defaulted into the worse case possible.

Suicide?

My heart thumped in an uneven painful rhythm. Swallowing a lump in my throat I hadn't even known formed I continued to attempt to let my teacher teach me the material of today's lesson.

Please be ok y/n, please, I love you to much to lose you, even though I've already have

4 days until the full moon

Tell him, tell him, he'll help you. The pain is too much, please it hurts.

I took a deep breath calming the clamoring thoughts in my head. A very dangerous place to be at this time of the month.

James was sitting next to me on my bed, the way he usually does, reading something. I noticed the title of his cover.

Lycanthropy: Everything you need to know and why their still human

"Didn't know we were learning about Lycan's in D.A.D.A." I murmured, focusing back on my own book.

"We're not, personal purpose." James answered back.

"What's your opinion on them?" I asked getting more nervous for James' answer.

Tell him, tell him, he'll help you. James loves you, he'll help you.

"There people, humans, witch or wizard, just with a condition. Doesn't make them dangerous, just misunderstood." James answered, "why do you ask?"

My eyes went wide, my pulse sky rocketing, the sudden awareness of the blood rushing through my veins.

"N-no reason." I desperately hid behind the small potions handbook from the library.

"Y/n/n?"

"Hmm? Very interesting potion here yes-"

"Wolves bane potion? How ironic, oh and your little wolves bane garden?"

My face paled, all of the blood rushing from my head into my toes.

Oh why can't I just sink to the bed and disappear?

"Very lovely flowers yes?"

"Do you, have, anything you want to tell me?" James asked causally not looking away from his book.

Oh what the hell.

"Fine! Fine!" I got up from the bed, tossing my book in the process, "I'm a werewolf!"

James froze in his spot. Before slowly lower his book so his eyes could peek above.

"What?"

"I contracted Lycanthropy ok?"

"Y/n sit down, and tell me everything, ok?" A sweet tone, of compassion and understanding, allowed me to sit and tell him everything.

3 days until the full moon

Remus

Nearing the summed of the month, a deep pit of anxiety took place, along with the increasing pain across my body. Sleep easily overcome me at any point possible, but restlessness at any other time.

Dozens of old scars, reminded me of the painful transformation. I pondered the lonely pain, that radiated through my diaphragm. Even being with one of the loves of my life, the immense feeling of being alone, was over clouding my mind.

Though James had been acting different, skittish, more than usual. He was usually found escorting Y/n.

Again in D.A.D.A, We were granted a study hall period, in the Great hall. Books open, parchments being scratched on, quills moving from their ink pots, and light chatter amongst the tables. The table segment of which I sat was mostly empty, Sirius lightly leaning on my left side. A soft voice came by and stopped right in front of me.

Glancing up for a moment, my eyes glued to the figure in front of me. Y/n. oh shit oh shit, keep it cool Remus, don't scare her away now. Though a few seconds later James adorned her side, as usual.

2 days until the full moon Y/n

The secret was out, at least a little, an invisible weight was lifted off of my chest. Granting less anxiety about the first shift of the school year.

Actively avoiding the conversation, about where I go, or how it happened, I seemed to feel free. I guess I hadn't seemed to notice the weight of the secret I had been keeping.

It had become second nature, to harbor such a deadly illness, no harm shall come to them. I promised myself. Even if it meant lying to them.

It's better to not have them know, than having them risk their lives for something I can handle.

1 day until the full moon Remus

Y/n seemed to be getting healthier with the promotion and consolation of James. Every one needs someone to lean on.

I just wish I had been me. Maybe if I had told her, told her about my illness that seemed to consume me at times. Hell, my best friends and boyfriend knew about me long before we even started dating.

Yet 2 years had gone by and I couldn't bring myself to tell her, I was afraid of losing her. But I still did.

The day of the full moon 3rd person

"Y/n, please come with me, trust me please!" James begged to the girl, that refused any type of help. "You've already taken the wolves bane potion, and you can't hurt me. You know why? Because Lycans don't attack Animagus'"

"You're an Animagus?" Y/n whispered, just above her breath.

"Yes. Now please." James held his hand out to her, in a silent last offer of help. Y/n laced her fingers with James' and he sped off with her close in tow.

James pulled a seemingly blank piece of paper from His hoodie pocket, and let go of her hand.

"James, what are you doing?" Y/n asked in a hush tone.

A wild grin played out on James' face, "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." The Incantation, followed through the tip of James' wand and caused ink to spread around the parchment. Names moved across through what looked like halls.

"What is that?"

"Marauders map, shows what every one is doing, every minute of everyday, see, there Dumbledore, in his office. I was just making sure the rest of the marauders were on their way and was no one coming."

"Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs?"

"Yea you'll see, come on now." James snatched Y/n's wrist and ran, taking her out of the castle and towards the shrieking shack.

"James the willow! Be careful!"

He continued to tug the girl behind him.

"James!"

"Hurry, there almost there." Reaching the edge of the field where the whomping willow resided, James stuffed the map back into his pocket.

"James? What the hell, where were you?" The rest of the marauders came out from behind a group of trees, "and what the fuck is she doing here?" Sirius snapped

"Can I tell them, Y/n?" James asked.

"I will," y/n replied in a hushed tone.

"Tell us what! You're dating?" Sirius scoffed.

"No, I-I'm a werewolf, a Lycan, a lycanthrope, whatever you want to call it! James said you could help me, last time I went to my usual spot, I fractured both of my legs and laid in the middle of the forbidden forest for 3 days"

Sirius paled out, and looked back to Remus.

"If you want me to go, tell me now, I've taken the Wolves bane potion, it's only a couple hours hike into the forbidden forest."

Remus felt his heart drop, then a deep ache. How long? I guess she also had no right to tell me, just as I never told her.

"No, Y/n stay, let's go inside." Remus said, sincerity laced into his voice. Her face softened.

"Where?" She asked.

Remus pointed to the willow. Her face paled.

James headed over to Peter to discuss who would stay outside in case anything went south. Sirius looked to Remus.

Remus took a few hesitant steps toward her. Before reaching his hand out offering her safe passage. Instead she swooped in gently under his arm.

Remus' heart swelled, maybe she does still love me after all.

1888 words

Ahhhahahahhah

It's finally coming together baiwbsiaiensl

-Kal

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