#I tried to laugh being such a terrible player on a team of great basketball players | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

candlewaxandp0lar0ids · 3 years

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I Don’t Like A Gold Rush || Jungkook

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Summary: Jungkook is the golden boy, an excellent student, the star of you college's football team. Rumor has it, there's simply nothing he can't do. The same cannot be said about you, but you've never had an issue with that. You're happy with your small group of friends and your lack of talent in sports. And then, Jin befriends Jungkook, and you find yourself spending a lot of time with him. Before you know it, you've taken an interest in him — and you're sure you shouldn't. There's no way this can end well for you... right?

Also available on Ao3.

Word count: 17.3k

Genre: College AU, strangers to lovers, slice of life, mostly fluff

Warnings & Tags: discussed insecurities, alcohol consumption, reader almost has a panic attack at some point, shy jungkook, jungkook is bad at Feelings, Reader is bad at feelings too, mutual pining kinda, Jungkook has long hair, sfw, New Year’s Day themed.

A/N: I don’t know how I would name my stories without Taylor Swift. Anyway, this is more or less centered around the New Year (it was supposed to be more and then... it didn’t happen), and I hope you’ll enjoy it! Happy New Year everyone!

The first time you hear Jungkook’s name, it’s in the sentence “Man, is there anything Jungkook can’t do?”. You look up at your friend Jin from the book you’re studying. You have no idea who Jungkook is, but that doesn’t mean anything. Jin is always complaining about how you don’t know anyone on the campus, which you think is quite unfair.

…but then you really don’t know that many people on the campus.

“What’s going on?” you ask him, because he sounds extremely annoyed, and he shows you his phone. On it, there is a score for a basketball game. You think.

Your college is famous for its basketball team… Right?

“Uh-uh,” you still say with a nod, trying to make it look like you have any idea what you’re talking about.

“This kid is crushing it at school, the girls love him, and now this!” Jin complains, a little too loud, and shushing noises come from a spot behind you. You turn around to give the group an apologetic look. “I really shouldn’t have bet against him.”

Ah, there you know what to say.

“You really need to stop making bets. You never win them.”

Jin glares at you.

“And you are a terrible friend. You’re supposed to comfort me!”

“I’ll comfort you when you stop making the worst choices imaginable,” you mutter, going back to your work. Jungkook’s name, his supposed excellence, and that basketball match — if it even is basketball — leave your mind as fast as they entered it, without leaving a trace behind.

“So the school’s won another basketball game, huh?”

You look up at Namjoon who’s just arriving to the table, holding his tray in his hands. You know he can’t possibly be talking to you about that, so you’re not surprised when Jin appears behind him. That doesn’t stop you from throwing Namjoon a disgusted look.

“Really, Joon? Sports?”

Namjoon shoots you an amused glance from behind his glasses. It’s notorious in your friends’ group that you despise conversations around that subject. You hate anything that involves objects flying around and anything that’s played in a team, and, apparently, those are the only sports that people care about. They could discuss athletics, or swimming, which you wouldn’t enjoy but you wouldn’t hate, but that never happens.

“You were right, Jin. That Jungkook guy really is impressive.”

You tune them out. You don’t care about basketball.

“You’re talking about yesterday’s game?” Yoongi asks, coming out of thin air, and you sigh. You had been hoping you would have at least one person to talk to during lunch.

“Jungkook’s friends with Hoseok,” Jin says, leaning forward conspiratorially, which does get your attention. If that’s true, then that Jungkook guy can’t be a completely terrible person. Hoseok is probably the nicest person you’ve ever met.

That being said, he might have very low standards for his friends. You know him enough to appreciate him, not to judge his tastes.

“So I’m going to become friends with him,” Jin announces triumphantly, only to be rewarded by a chorus of groans and protests.

“But why, Jin?” you ask. “Please don’t talk about popularity. This isn’t high school anymore.”

“And that stuff was already stupid back then,” Namjoon adds, and you nod. You can always count on Namjoon to support you.

“And I hate people,” Yoongi says.

“And Yoongi hates people!” Namjoon immediately picks up. “Do you really want to make him go through that?”

You grin at the question. Yoongi’s misanthropy always comes in handy. Jin, however, is not amused, but he just shakes his head disapprovingly. He’s used to the three of you teaming up against him by now. Usually, it’s on academical subjects, but he isn’t phased by it anymore regardless of that. Not that there’s much that can phase Jin anyway.

“First of all, I said I was going to be his friend, not you lowly peasants, and second, he seems like a nice guy! Do I need another reason to want to make friends?”

You tilt your head.

“He’s protesting too much,” you say.

“I agree,” Namjoon nods. “That’s suspicious.”

“Very suspicious.”

“Come on,” Jin rolls his eyes, “do you really think that little of me?”

“And now he’s trying to guilt-trip us. Joon, can’t you analyze that conversation and figure out what it all means?”

“You know that’s not how literary analysis works, right?” Jin asks you, but you ignore him.

“Actually, it is,” Namjoon says, pushing his glasses back on his nose. “I’d say you were right with your comment,” he adds, looking at you. “I’d say… this is about parties.”

“You’re not going to actually believe—”

“Thanks, Joon,” you say, and the two of you high-five without looking at each other. Yoongi lets out an appreciate whistle.

Even if Namjoon and you aren’t being serious about this, parties actually make sense. Jin… isn’t quite a social butterfly but, unlike the three of you, he does enjoy people’s company to some degree. You know first hand that he’s been to a few this year — you had accompanied him for moral support — but they were pretty tame, and you’re aware that he at least wants to try some more intense stuff. The problem was that those were harder to be invited to. Hoseok could probably do something about it, but he tends to avoid parties on campus.

“Okay, then you should go for it,” you nod.

Yoongi and Namjoon, sitting on either side of you, approve. Jin looks a little surprised at your reaction.

“That changed your mind?”

“You said you wanted ‘the full college experience’,” Namjoon explains with a shrug. “If you think that’s part of it, we wouldn’t want to hold you back.”

“We will judge you for it, though,” Yoongi warns without batting an eyelid, pokerface perfect, and you laugh. You won’t be mean about it, of course. You just might tease him a little.

“Thank you,” Jin says. “I’ll do it, then.”

Good. If you’re lucky, it will be out of his system next time you all have lunch together.

Lady luck had never been on your side, for as long as you could remember. It wasn’t like you got the worst of things either, but usually, things that could go wrong, did go wrong. Because of that, you tried your best to remove those things from your path. Sometimes, though, you just didn’t manage to identify them.

And that’s why, when you hear Jin’s voice and look up from your food, being the first at the table as always, you see he’s accompanied by two people.

One of them has fluffy, dark brown hair, falling on either side of his face and in his eyes. He’s talking and laughing, and there’s something that you can’t help but identify as mischievous in his smile. The other is slightly taller, with jet black hair held up in a bun. He’s quiet, mouth opening for silent laughs when his friend jokes. Between them, there’s Jin, and you think that they look good together. All handsome, all holding themselves with confidence.

You had realized before that Jin felt out of place in your group, from an outside point of view at least, but it’s never been as striking as it is now, as he’s walking with people he clearly belongs with.

It makes you really thankful that he’s your friend.

“Hey,” Jin says, smiling widely, “these are—”

“You’re untying your hair before eating?” you say, looking at the guy with the bun who just sat opposite from you and took off his hair tie with a sigh. He looks up at you with wide round eyes, like you just caught him red-handed — doing what, you’re not quite sure.

That is the first thing you ever say to Jeon Jungkook.

“Um. Yes?”

“Aren’t you afraid you’ll get hair in your food?”

You know people find you too blunt sometimes, think you come off as aggressive, but you almost never intend for that to happen. In that case, you just think the logic here is a bit surprising.

“That’s… a good point, actually.”

“(Y/N),” Jin sighs, “let me introduce you to Jungkook” (he points to the man who’s now tying his hair back up) “and Taehyung.” (he points to the other guy, who’s flashing you a smile.)

“Oh,” you say, looking back at Jungkook. “You play basketball.”

He lets out an awkward laugh and avoids your eyes. Instead, he grabs his fork and focuses on it, twirling it in his hand.

“Yeah, I do— I do that.”

Huh. It takes you a second to piece things together, and you think Namjoon will be of great help once he’ll be there, but for now, one conclusion comes to you.

Jungkook is shy.

“I play basketball too,” Taehyung says, leaning over the table, grinning at you, and you can tell that it’s his way of swooping in to save Jungkook. You can appreciate that.

“She hates basketball,” Jin warns.

“That’s a strong word,” you say, but only half-heartedly, because, well, you definitely don’t like it.

“I think it works.”

“You think what works?”

Jin’s face falls while you grin. If Taehyung is Jungkook’s savior, Namjoon is yours. Your friend sends you a questioning look as he sits next to you, facing Taehyung. He gives polite nods to the two basketball players, like they sit with you at lunch every week, but you notice that he doesn’t quite meet their eyes. Namjoon is not particularly shy, nor a misanthrope like Yoongi, he just isn’t too comfortable around people he’s just met.

You and Jin, well, you’re perhaps a little too comfortable. Not everyone likes it.

“He says I hate basketball.”

“But that would imply you care about basketball.”

“Exactly.”

“And you don’t.”

“I know.”

“Which means you don’t hate basketball. As always, you’re wrong, Jin.”

Jin looks extremely, extremely done with you, but when you and Namjoon high-five, Jungkook laughs quietly and Taehyung nods in appreciation — for the gesture, not the debate.

That is the moment when Yoongi drops his tray on the table and sends a weird glance towards Taehyung and Jungkook.

“What did I miss?” he asks. His tone is a bit dry, and you see Jin’s shoulders straightening. He knows Yoongi is going to be the most difficult one to win over. Not that you’ve been won over yet, but you’re not that difficult. Usually, people don’t like you, not the other way around. You don’t blame them. You’re not sure you’d like yourself very much if you were in their place.

“Oh,” Jungkook says spontaneously, “we had a class together last year! You’re majoring in engineering, right?”

Yoongi looks at him. His eyes are shining with suspicion, and you can practically see the gears turning in his head. Knowing him, he’s definitely wondering why Jungkook would even remember him.

“Right,” he finally confirms, slowly.

There’s a moment of silence, which Namjoon breaks.

“I’m a literature major, by the way.”

“That’s really cool,” Jungkook comments honestly, with the same spontaneity he displayed earlier.

“And I’m in mathematics,” you say.

“Wow. I thought you people existed only in legends,” Taehyung says while Jungkook avoids your eyes. You decide that, yeah, you like Kim Taehyung.

“Don’t say that, I like maths,” Jungkook protests, voice soft, much to your surprise — and, judging by his reaction, Taehyung’s.

You were right, you decide. Jungkook is not a completely terrible person.

You didn’t expect it to become a routine, for Jungkook and Taehyung to eat with you guys, but it does, and as time goes on, other people join your little table. You’re not sure you like that. It’s clear that those people are orbiting around Jungkook, which, good for them, but you don’t see why you need to be there for that.

You do see that Jungkook is not completely comfortable with all of it. He’s good at handling people, good at making jokes and at laughing at the right times, you notice, but there is a stiffness in his shoulders more often than not, and it looks like he’s well-trained at it rather than enjoying it. It kind of reminds you of Jin, except Jin is not as quiet the rest of the time. Taehyung obviously does his best not to let his friend deal with things alone, which is sweet, but he can’t do everything for him.

You barely exchange a word with Jungkook during that time period. You’re usually trying to be forgotten when the table is buzzing with noise, finding refuge in Namjoon and Yoongi’s company. You thought Yoongi would be an ally in reclaiming what’s always been your spot, but it quickly becomes obvious that he has a crush on Taehyung’s friend Jimin, so he never complains about the recent invasion of the table by strangers.

You hear a lot of basketball vocabulary. More than you care for, to be honest. That’s one of the few moments when Jungkook’s face lights up and he gets truly excited, with an almost childish happiness. His demeanor changes, from shy to confident, and the transformation never ceases to amaze you. As soon as the conversation ends, his shoulders fall, he smiles awkwardly, and focuses back on his food or his phone.

You’ve met his eyes a few times in those moments, because he often looks around him like he’s afraid someone’s noticed. He averts his very quickly, though, so you’ve never said anything about it.

So, really, there’s not much that changes. You still only speak to your three friends — you think Taehyung is a good person, and you don’t think he hates you, but you don’t have anything to say to each other —, and sure, you have a little less space when you eat and more noise around you, but aside from that, it’s pretty much the same. You think that’s a relief. You’re not too fond of change.

Usually, you’re pretty decent at spotting it coming. You did miss it when Jin said he was going to become Jungkook’s friend, but other than that you’re able to do your best to avoid it. You don’t see anything coming the day Taehyung calls out your name, though. You look up at him from the book Namjoon is showing you, surprised. He has an arm slung over Jungkook’s shoulders, and Jungkook isn’t looking at you, of course.

“Do you think you could explain a maths-thing to Jungkook?”

You blink at him.

“What’s the ‘maths-thing’?”

“Does it matter?”

You raise an eyebrow, and Jungkook groans. You get the feeling that he didn’t really want Taehyung to ask you about it. He sends an annoyed glance to his friend, who is still smiling brightly at you, while pushing a lock of hair out of his face. His hair is tied, but this one traitorous lock always escapes.

“I’m struggling a little with probabilities,” he admits, glancing at you for half a second. “But I’m sure I’ll be fine once I can get my head back into it, I’ve just been training a lot recently and—”

“I can help you, if you want,” you say. “I’m not the most fond of probabilities, but it should be okay.”

“Great!” Taehyung says, patting his friend’s shoulder before Jungkook can answer. “You should do that then.”

“You’re sure you don’t mind?” Jungkook asks, actually looking at you this time. You meet his eyes, notice that he looks worried about it. You can’t figure out why.

“I really don’t,” you shrug.

He smiles at you, a small, hesitant smile, but a smile nonetheless. Probably the first one he directs at you. It’s a nice sight, you decide, and you smile back.

Jin’s sentence “is there anything Jungkook can’t do” takes all its sense on the day you meet Jungkook at the library to study. You don’t know what you expected. You never thought Jungkook was dumb or anything, but since Taehyung asked you to help, you thought he would have some difficulties, at least. However, as it turns out, he either understands immediately when you explain something to him, or he’s already understood it. He asks for some clarifications here and there, but all in all, you feel kind of useless.

“You don’t need me at all,” you say after a little while, and Jungkook looks up from the book with the worried wide-eyed look you’ve gotten used to.

“No, no, you’re doing a great job,” he protests. “You’re really helping me out here.”

“No I’m not. It’s obvious that you could do that all on your own.”

He deflates a little at that, looks away from you.

“You help,” he mumbles. “I have a hard time focusing when I’m alone.”

Oh.

That makes a lot of sense to you, actually. You’re good at focusing all of your energy on one thing, perhaps even too good, to the point where you easily get obsessed and become unable to take care of anything else, but even you need the right conditions for that.

“Okay,” you say with a nod.

Jungkook gives you an anxious look.

“So you don’t mind helping me out?” he asks, and there’s something in his voice that catches you, but you can’t tell what it is exactly. Maybe it’s the hope, or maybe it’s the fear. You don’t understand what he’d be afraid of. Worst case scenario, you would say no. That wouldn’t be the end of the world.

“We can work together,” you offer. “You can ask me if you need help for anything and I’ll just work on some other stuff.”

He seems relieved, and again, you just don’t understand it. It’s not like you’re his only option. There are plenty of people out there who could help him. Plenty of people who would jump at the opportunity of helping him. You know that, because he’s always surrounded by those people, and everybody in school seems to know him. Even when you walked into the library with him earlier, before you got to the table you’re sitting at now, a few students greeted him. You don’t see why he would attach any importance to you, specifically, helping him. You barely know each other.

“Thanks,” he says, and he gives you a small smile. For some reason, that makes you drop the subject. Instead of asking about it — which, knowing yourself, you probably would have — you shrug it off and reply with a nod.

The silence that follows feels comfortable, to you at least. You’ve never minded silence. Jin hates it, though. You get to work, watching absent-mindedly as Jungkook goes through the lesson he was working on. He does ask you a couple of questions, but it’s probably to make you feel like you’re doing something rather than because he actually needs it. You still answer them, and watch him grin, satisfied with himself, when he turns out to be right every single time.

“Are you coming to Taehyung’s party this week-end?” he asks out of the blue after about an hour.

You look up, surprised. The two of you haven’t exchanged much, and certainly have not talked about anything other than— well, other than maths. His eyes are on his notebook, as usual, and you don’t get any insight as to why he asked the question.

“I don’t know. Is Jin coming?”

“Uh, I guess? Taehyung’s probably talked to him about it.”

“Then I’m probably going.”

Jungkook mulls over your answer for a few seconds, twirling his pencil between his fingers, and you feel like you have to clarify, which is not an urge you have often. Usually, you let people decipher for themselves what you meant. That works very well with Namjoon, sometimes with Yoongi, not so great with the rest of the world. Including Jin, though Jin compensates with his impressive ability to interpret everything you say in his favor.

“We always go to parties with Jin. For moral support.”

For all that you tease him, you genuinely care for him. You know he wants you to go with him, so you do. It’s as simple as that.

Jungkook doesn’t look at you, but he still smiles at what you say, and it’s— it’s interesting. There’s something about his behavior that makes you curious, like you are when you’re trying to solve a complicated equation.

“That’s nice,” he comments.

“So… you’ll be there?” you ask. It’s taken you a long time to come up with that simple question. It often takes you a long time to find things to say to keep a conversation going. You’re pretty bad at it.

“It’s at my fraternity,” Jungkook informs you, glancing at you briefly, and you smile. This is exactly the type of party Jin wanted to go to. He’s probably happy about it. “The entire basketball team should be there.”

Great. People.

“That’s nice,” you say, because you have no idea what to add at this point. Jungkook simply nods, and the conversation dies an awkward death.

It’s another half an hour until Jungkook looks at his watch and starts putting his stuff back in his bag.

“I have to go to practice,” he tells you, clearly in a hurry. “Can we— Would you mind if—”

“We can do this again. If that’s what you meant.”

He gives you a bright smile, and that actually surprises you. He looks relieved that you finished his sentence for him.

“Thank you,” he says sincerely.

And just like that, he’s gone, practically running out of the library. For someone who talks as little as he does, he sure leaves a void when he goes away, you think, looking at the empty chair.

But you quickly shrug it off. You’re used to being alone. You like being alone.

Jungkook isn’t going to change that.

You realize very quickly that, while accompanying Jin to parties was never something you particularly enjoyed, going to this one was downright a mistake.

You have this unspoken rule, with your friends, that you shouldn’t stick together the entire time. You’re supposed to wander off, find something to do for yourself, maybe talk to some people. Get that college experience. You’ve never had a problem to do that, even if you ended up quietly sipping soda in a corner more often than not.

Here, though, you simply cannot shake off the fact that you don’t belong here, that this is not your scene. The people here are loud, energetic, garish. They make you feel like a black and white picture, like a silent movie. You want to run away, but you can’t. You don’t want to leave Jin, Namjoon or Yoongi behind, even if you doubt they’re having the same kind of problems you do. You’re pretty sure you saw Yoongi talking with Jimin, and last time you saw Namjoon, you think a cheerleader was holding him by the hand and leading him out of the room. You don’t know what Jin’s doing, but you’re trusting that he’s okay.

You walk around aimlessly, find Jungkook and Taehyung playing beer-pong with some people. Maybe you should be happy to see people you know, but you’re not. If anything, it only drives the point home even more to see them so comfortable: you don’t belong here. Your chest tightens, and you turn around. You need a little peace and quiet. You need to get away.

“(Y/N)!”

You jump at the sound of your name. No one’s said it since you’ve entered the house. No one knows you here.

Except Jungkook, who’s right behind you.

He’s more confident than usual, and you guess, based on his slightly hazy eyes, that it has a lot to do with alcohol.

“Are you having fun? How long have you been here? It’s nice to see you!”

He’s speaking fast, excitedly, and as he does, he runs his fingers through his hair, which he’s let down. It looks good on him, you decide, even as you reply to him with a tense smile.

“Hey, you should join us, we’re—”

“Do you have a closet somewhere?”

Jungkook blinks.

“A closet?”

“Yeah.”

There are probably very few things that are less weird than asking a guy if he has a closet you can get into because you’re on the verge of having a panic attack and you can’t stay outside surrounded by people a second longer.

Jungkook doesn’t say anything about it, though. He just leads you through the house and opens the door to a closet for you. You get inside without giving it much more thought, and he looks at you, puzzled. He’s actually looking at you, which you decide confirms that he is drunk.

“Do you— Are you waiting for someone?”

“No,” you say. “I just need a little break.”

He thinks about your answer for a while, probably longer than needed, and nods.

And then, he gets into the closet with you and closes the door.

Inside, it’s dark, with only a ray of light coming in. You can’t see his face, which doesn’t help you understand why he just did that. The space is cramped, and you can smell alcohol coming from his breath, can feel the heat radiating from his body, but it doesn’t bother you that much. It’s still better in here than outside.

“Why did you do that?”

“I thought I would keep you company. Like you’re here to keep company to Jin, you know?”

He’s drunk, definitely, and yet you feel genuinely touched by his words. You shouldn’t, because you doubt they hold that much meaning, but you can’t help it. You don’t need company, but that’s besides the point. His intentions are what matters.

“Thank you,” you say.

“It’s not a problem. You’re helping me with my maths.”

Your first reaction is to laugh at that, because it feels completely unprompted, but then the logic of the reasoning kind of appears to you.

“I mean it!” Jungkook protests. “You haven’t talked about how I’m good at everything or how I’m the one who should help you.”

You frown.

“You shouldn’t help me. You’re good at maths, but I’m better than you.”

It’s Jungkook’s turn to laugh, and just like his earlier smile, it takes you completely by surprise. It’s not one of those quiet laughs that he usually has. It’s light and pleasant, and you briefly wonder what his face looks like when he laughs like that. You kind of want to see it.

“You’re a scary person,” he tells you when he’s stopped laughing. “You always say those things directly. It’s like you don’t even care.”

You’ve heard that before. Well, you haven’t been called scary until now, but people have said that you were intimidating. You, personally, believe you’re the least threatening person to have ever walked this Earth. You couldn’t hurt a fly if you wanted to.

Jungkook makes some sense here, though. Your filter is very limited, and there are a lot of things you say that feel acceptable to you, and that other people… don’t think are acceptable. You don’t mean to do it. It just happens.

“I think you’re good at a lot of things, though,” you say slowly.

Jungkook lets out a long sigh and then you hear him sliding down to the ground. You hesitate for about half a second before joining him down there. You fold your legs, holding your knees against your chest while you wait for him to say something.

“People are always saying that,” he finally mumbles. “But what if I’m not that good? What if I fail one day?”

It’s strange. You understand what he’s saying, understand the feeling of pressure, but you don’t understand the emotions that should come with it. In your case, you know that no one holds you to a higher standard than you do. It can be unhealthy, the way you can torture yourself if you don’t meet the standards you’ve set for yourself, but at least you’re the only one you have to answer to. Obviously, it’s not Jungkook’s case.

“Then you’ll try again,” you say, because that’s what you do when you fail. “Or, if you think it’s not that important, you won’t.”

“But what will they say?” he insists. “What if we lose the next game? Or the one after that? What if I fail a class? I can’t get anything done these days.”

“You’ll be fine,” you say soothingly, half-wondering how you ended up here, comforting the college’s golden boy in a closet after fighting off a panic attack. “It’s not like you’re the only one in your team. People will understand.”

You think they will. You hope they will. They should.

“You would understand.”

It’s true, but then, you really do not care for basketball, and it’s not like you have that sort of expectations for Jungkook. You wouldn’t think much of it, if he failed at something tomorrow. If it was the maths test you’ve helped him with, you would be surprised, but that’s because you saw him studying and it was obvious he had understood everything, not because you think he can inherently succeed at everything he does.

Which you guess might be the heart of the problem here.

You reach out to put your hand on his shoulder. It’s not that easy in the dark, and you wonder for a second if you’ve grabbed something else, until you feel hair tickling your skin. Yup, you were right.

“You have the right not to be good at something every once in a while,” you say softly. “No one can be on top of their game all of the time.”

You hear what sounds like a choked sob.

“I like that they’re counting on me, you know? I like that I’m helping them out by playing. I just— I don’t know what’s going to happen when I stop being as good.”

He said when, not if, and that breaks your heart.

Without thinking about it, you slide your hand down his arm and grab his hand. You squeeze it in yours, gently, and then you inch closer to put your head on his shoulder. You remember reading that physical touch was good for people who were in emotional pain. You hope it helps him.

“You locked yourself in here with me because you thought I needed company,” you whisper. “There’s so much more to you than just being good at sports or having good grades. And if people don’t see that, it’s their loss. Because you’re a great person.”

He hums, but the sound is quiet, and it’s then that you realize how tense he is.

Shit. You must have crossed a boundary. You start to remove your hand, but he closes his fingers around yours, keeping you in place. He’s still tense, you can feel it everywhere his body touches yours. But he doesn’t let go.

“You mean that,” he says. There are so many emotions in his voice that you can’t identify them all. Relief, happiness, amusement… You don’t know where to start.

“I usually mean what I say.”

“I’ve noticed,” he says, and you can hear the smile that’s dancing on his lips.

He’s still not letting go of your hand, but you don’t mind. Staying here, with Jungkook, in this small closet is as good a way of spending your evening as anything else you could do out there.

So you stay.

“Where did you all vanish Saturday?” Jin asks, and Namjoon, Yoongi and yourself immediately find your food a lot more interesting. You exchange panicked glances that mean ‘did none of you stay around? This was poorly coordinated’ before finally daring to look up.

“I talked to Jimin,” Yoongi says, face as inexpressive as always.

“I played some beer-pong with Taehyung,” Namjoon says.

That leaves only you.

“I talked to Jungkook,” you tell Jin. That is technically true. It omits the part where the two of you were together in a closet, but if you said that, there would be a lot of questions you don’t really want to answer to. Somehow, you think you would be more embarrassed to tell them that there was nothing going on there than if you told them you hooked up with him. You’re not sure why.

“Jungkook disappeared for a long time,” Jin says, narrowing his eyes at you.

You do your best to keep a straight face while you poke at your salad. You don’t want anyone here to have the wrong idea, and you finally manage to put your finger on what you’re afraid of. Humiliation. You’d feel humiliated at having to tell them that nothing happened and that there is nothing Jungkook could possibly see in you. They would be nice to you, of course they would, but you don’t want to see the look in their eyes.

“Did he? Maybe that was after I left. I didn’t stay that long.”

That’s a lie.

“Really?” Jin asks, clearly skeptical. “I think I saw you there pretty late.”

Maybe when you went down to get some snacks and drinks to bring back to the closet. Damn Jungkook and his stomach.

“Well, that depends what you mean by ‘late’ and ‘long’,” you say.

That’s you calling Namjoon for help, and he recognizes your SOS for what it is. From the way Jin’s face falls, so does he.

“She’s right,” Namjoon comments, so nonchalant you would almost believe he’s doing it naturally. “What is ‘late’, really? Isn’t it always—”

“Please stop,” Jin groans, burying his face in his hands. “Just because you’re a literature major doesn’t mean you’re the only one who understands words.”

“Actually it does,” you say with a nod. “That’s exactly what it means.”

You start lifting your hand for a high-five, relieved Jin’s attention is off you, but he sends the two of you a dark glare.

“You two are unbearable. Don’t do that.”

“We have to,” you protest. You would hate to miss a chance to high-five Namjoon.

“No you don’t, you—”

“Actually they do,” Yoongi says, and your jaw drops. Yoongi never intervenes, and you had always thought that if he did, it wouldn’t be in your favor. “That’s exactly how gravity works.”

Jin looks like his soul has left his body. He only comes back to himself after you, Yoongi and Namjoon have all exchanged high-fives.

“I hate you,” he says, sounding terribly tired. “I hate every single one of you.”

“Sorry Jin,” you smile warmly.

“No you’re not. You’re the worst.”

Except he sounds fond, affectionate, and you laugh before going back to your salad. You miss the quick glances your three friends exchange after that. They’ve all noticed you eluding and changing the subject. They don’t want to rush you, know you would hate it and that it’s better to drop it.

But they’ve noticed.

Working with Jungkook on Wednesday afternoons easily becomes a habit, so easily you don’t even notice it until it’s something you look forward to during the week. It adds to the time you already spend eating with him and Taehyung. Jungkook is, slowly, starting to become a part of your life. It’s a thought you refuse to dwell on, because it sounds so strange.

The Wednesdays afternoons are something special, though. You and Jungkook don’t really talk at lunch, even if he’s clearly more relaxed around you now, which you suspect is the reason why you’re ‘Taehyung-approved’. On Wednesdays, you— Well, you don’t talk much, either, but it’s different. It’s a time that only belongs to the two of you. You like that.

You slowly find out things about him, his family, his life. It’s never the main subject of conversation, but it makes you feel like you’re solving a puzzle.

“My father wanted me to focus on my classes and forget about basketball,” he comments once. “But I could do both.”

It makes you laugh, because he says it with obvious satisfaction, but it also makes you wonder if there’s more to it. Jungkook doesn’t add anything, though, and you don’t want to probe into his life, so you don’t ask. After that, small pieces of the puzzle keep falling into place.

“My high school coach told me I could train more if I didn’t work so hard for school.” But he could do both.

“My friends said I never hung out with them anymore and that I shouldn’t work so hard.” So he did both.

It’s always the same story. People telling him things, giving him opinions on what the should and shouldn’t do, and him stretching himself thinner and thinner. It’s almost a miracle he’s still doing as well as he is, honestly.

But his tone changes when he talks about his former relationships. He’s usually light and genuine, sharing with you just because. It’s clear that, as much as the stories make you frown, he doesn’t have an issue with them, and you guess that’s all that matters. The first time he says something about an ex-girlfriend of his, though, he’s guarded, almost careful. He sounds like he doesn’t want to tell you.

“My ex said I worked too much.”

He doesn’t add anything. Whatever it was she wanted, he couldn’t do it and work. Didn’t manage to do both. After that, he doesn’t look at you for the rest of the day, like he did when you first met.

You never get a name for the girlfriend. He talks about relationships again, but you don’t even know if he’s always talking about the same one. You doubt it, though, and it only makes things worse.

“My ex wanted me to attend fewer practices.”

“My ex said I didn’t care enough to make time for her.”

“My ex dumped me after I lost a game.”

That last one hurts you, because you remember him crying in the closet because of that exact fear. You want to take his hand again, but you can’t dare to.

“She’s stupid for that,” you say instead.

Jungkook looks surprised first, because you never comment on what he’s telling you, then a smile slowly forms on his lips.

“If the only reason she was with you was because you won a lot of games, you’re better off without her,” you add.

“That’s what Taehyung said.”

“Taehyung’s right.”

Jungkook goes quiet for a little while after that, to the point that you look up, worried that you might have offended him. When you do, he’s looking at you, something you can’t identify shining in his eyes.

“Everything okay?”

He blinks like he’d just woken up for a dream, then nods. He doesn’t tell you that he hadn’t believed what Taehyung said — until you said it and he looked at you and thought that yeah, maybe he was better off without her indeed.

You’re surprised to run into Jungkook late one night, as you’re walking back to your dorm. It shouldn’t shock you — you do go to the same college — but you’re so used to only ever seeing him in the library or the cafeteria that meeting him outside is almost confusing. At least he seems taken aback as well, if the way his already round eyes widen is anything to go by.

Then, his surprised face morphs into a smile, and a wave of warmth hits you without a warning. You don’t get any time to think about it before he waves at you. His shyness is not completely gone, and you see him waver, hesitate, even as he’s walking up to you. You’re quick to close the gap between you, meeting him in the middle. Just in case.

“Hey,” he says, voice a little raspy. He has what you identify as a sports bag, slung over his shoulder, and you wonder what he was doing out so late. You were working at the library until it closed, which is far from being rare for you, but that obviously wasn’t his case.

“Hey,” you reply, smiling back. “Were you— training?”

Amusement flashes in his eyes at the careful way you chose your words, afraid to get it wrong. As he grew more comfortable around you, he also started making fun of you for not knowing the first thing about basketball. Strangely, you don’t mind that much.

“I was at the gym,” he says. “Practice was earlier today.”

“Oh,” is all you can muster. You don’t know what you’re supposed to do. Should you ask what he was doing at the gym? The answer would only leave you with more questions, you’re sure.

You’re still debating it when Jungkook clears his throat. He reaches for his ponytail and undoes it, shaking his head so the hair fall back into place. The sight is— interesting. Pretty. You’re not sure why you’re so fascinated by it.

“Do you want me to walk you back to your dorm?” he asks, slight concern in his voice. “It’s late.”

“Is it on your way back?” you question, frowning. You would hate to be a bother.

“No, but—”

“I’m fine, then. I do that several times a week, I’ve never had a problem.”

That was, apparently, not the thing to say. Jungkook only looks more worried now.

“Several times a week? That’s really not careful.”

“I don’t see a problem, there’s no one around.”

“That’s exactly my p—” He stops and shakes his head, but gives a look you’ve seen before. A lot. It’s a look that says ‘I can’t believe someone as smart as you can also be so stupid’, in those exact terms. “Expected value,” he then says, and your eyes widen a little. Maths! Great. You can do maths. “Let’s say there’s a 99% chance nothing happens. Your gain is still minimal.”

Well, you get to study late and enjoy a walk home alone at night, but you’re willing to humor him.

“But in the one per-cent where something bad happens…”

He doesn’t have to finish his sentence. You know exactly where this is going, and you let out a sigh. He’s not wrong. On that aspect, at least.

“Fine.”

He grins widely.

“I just beat you at maths.”

“You didn’t beat me, I—”

“I just beat you at maths!”

You roll your eyes, choose to let him have that. It’s not going to change anything to your behavior after tonight, because the day has not come where you’ll let probabilities rule your life, but, after all, you don’t mind sharing your night walk with him.

Jungkook starts showing up to walk you home whenever he can. It’s not every time, which you’re kind of thankful for — you like his company, but you like being alone just as much, and you need a healthy dose of that every week —, but it does happen regularly. You find him sitting in front of the library, freezing cold, and you take pity on him, buying him a coffee from the vending machine inside, seconds before they lock the building.

That’s how you find out he likes his coffee tasting as little like coffee as possible.

Sometimes, he joins you later, and you hear him jogging to catch up with you. You don’t have the heart to tell him that that defeats the purpose of everything he’s doing, because it’s absolutely terrifying.

As the days turn into weeks, the air becomes colder, and you start seeing Christmas decorations appearing over the campus. You don’t know who is in charge of doing that, but they must be excited about it, because tinsel and few strings of fairy lights start appearing around the campus at the end of November. Jungkook is delighted by it, and you enjoy watching his reactions. You’re not big on Christmas, personally. You enjoy the tradition, the gift-giving, spending time with your family — you’re visiting them briefly this year — but you mostly see Christmas as an excuse for all of that. Jungkook loves it, though, and you decide that his excitement makes you like the season a little more.

“Hey, we should make a stop,” he tells you one night.

You look at him like he’s crazy. It’s the middle of December and it’s already half past nine. You’re cold, it’s dark outside, and you want to go home.

“A stop?” you repeat.

“Oh, c’mon,” he says, and he has that wide, childish grin that you’ve seen only a handful of times. You haven’t learned how to resist it yet. “C’mon!”

You sigh. But you follow.

As it turns out, he takes you just a little way off your usual trajectory. Behind a building you’ve never really paid attention to, Jungkook leads you to a small basketball court. You eye the place suspiciously. It’s empty, well lit, but you never know. A ball might come out of nowhere to hit you in the face, as they had a tendency to do when you were in high school and playing for a team that had picked you last.

By the time you turn around to tell Jungkook that, okay, you’ve seen it, let’s go home now, he’s taken off his coat and pulled a basketball out of his bag. You don’t even want to ask. His grin is even wider than earlier.

“C’mon,” he says.

“Absolutely not.”

“Let me show you, okay?”

You want to say no but— It can’t hurt, right? And Jungkook loves basketball, and you’re his— friend or something, so you should try to take some interest in it.

You take off your coat and let him lead you onto the court. There, you watch him as he dribbles in what you guess is an effective way (you can’t know for sure, you’re barely able to catch the ball after it’s bounced once so your standards are incredibly low), and then demonstrates his ability to score a handful of times. It’s not that you’re not impressed — again, you can’t do anything with this unpredictable, devilish round thing — but you also can’t say this is a quality you think much of.

You liked it a lot better when he convinced you to let him walk you home by talking about the expected value.

“You want to try?” he offers, holding the ball out for you.

You would rather die.

But you take the ball from his hand and eye the basket like it’s personally offended you. That makes Jungkook laugh.

“You can get closer than that,” he says.

You hold back a groan, aim and, of course, fail. It’s almost a relief. You can cross that off your list, again, just like you did as a kid first, then as a teenager. You’re bad at sports, always have been and, considering the effort you’re putting into it those days, always will be. That’s something you can count on.

Before you can say anything, Jungkook’s caught the ball and is running back towards you.

“Okay, let me show you.”

Is he going to— No, he’s just demonstrating it. You’re kind of disappointed not to get your typical ‘guy teaching girl anything sports related’ moment, disappointed that he doesn’t come to stand behind you to show you like they do in movies, but you can’t unpack that right now. You do watch with some degree of interest as he shows you how to position yourself.

“So you really aim for the line above the basket, not the basket, okay?”

“If you think that just because I aim for something I hit it…”

He chuckles, then gives the ball back to you, and you sigh. This. This is why you hate sports. It’s not the one-off failure, that would be fine on its own. It’s the constant humiliation whenever you even try it. You’re going to fail this attempt, and the next one, and the one after that. You’re a lost cause. You’re fine with it, too, but you don’t particularly want to go through that again.

You do your best, though. Not because you think it will change something, but because you kind of want to prove that this isn’t all you. That, even if you’re trying your hardest, there’s just something that refuses to let you score or do it right.

“Wait!” Jungkook walks over to you, puts his hand on your back, and you freeze. “You need to straighten yourself a little,” he says, placing his hand between your shoulder blades, and you nod. His hand is warm and large, you can feel it even over your sweatshirt. “There.”

He removes the hand, and you’re left a little off balance without him by your side. You shake your head quickly, shoot, and, without any surprise, miss.

Jungkook is on the ball just as fast as before, but you’re as quick as him to grab your coat and put it back on. You’re already feeling warm all over, though.

“You don’t want to try again?” he asks, sounding genuinely disappointed.

Of course, you take pity on him.

“Maybe next time,” you say.

He gives you a bright smile, so genuinely happy, and you know that you won’t be able to deny him next time either.

Jin is the reason you’re here, and that is the version you will stick with. No, you didn’t want to go see a basketball game, even if Jungkook is playing. No, you didn’t feel the slightest bit curious about it. No, you would not be there if Jin hadn’t asked. It’s Jin’s fault if you’re here on a Friday night instead of being, well, at your place, likely doing something equally as unproductive.

You don’t even understand what is going on in the field. There’s a lot of running and throwing the ball, that’s for sure, but then, you’ve just learned that scoring from different places in the field and at different moments will not earn the players the same amount of points.

You don’t think you’ve ever seen your friends look at you with such consternation as when they had to explain it to you.

In that situation, you can’t say that you get much from looking at the field. You definitely follow Jungkook with your eyes, cheer and clap when he scores, and let out cries of disappointment with the rest of the crowd when he doesn’t, but truly, the only way you have any idea what’s going on is by looking at the score board. And the truth is, that score is a little too close for comfort.

You hate that it has that much of an impact on you, but it stresses you out. Your leg bounces on the floor, an habit of yours Jin hates, but he’s too focused to notice, which is only more stressful. Jin always notices, and if it doesn’t, it must mean that the situation is dire.

The remaining seconds are slowly ticking down. Jungkook’s team is ahead by only one point, which means that if the other team scores, they will win. You think. You’re not entirely sure, but for your defense, you’ve just heard about it. Jungkook seems to be everywhere on the field. Taehyung is his shadow, perhaps not as noticeable or as spectacular in his actions, but certainly effective.

Again, you have no knowledge of basketball whatsoever.

Jin grabs your thigh, and only then do you realize that something’s happened. The action was so quick, so smooth, that you missed it entirely — but maybe you were also kind of thinking of something else.

Someone from the other team — you don’t even know your school’s team’s players, you’re not going to learn the other ones — just made a break for it. Based on what you can tell, Taehyung blocked his path, pushing him straight into Jungkook’s arms. In a movement you cannot begin to comprehend, Jungkook takes the ball from him, without ever stopping his run.

After that, he’s unstoppable.

He crosses the field, looking almost like he’s dancing in the way he avoids his opponents, and, of course, scores.

The time falls to zero. The crowd stands up like one man, screaming and shouting, and you yourself find yourself jumping up to hug Jin. He hugs you back, but the two of you quickly separate, patting each other’s backs awkwardly.

Jin starts talking with Namjoon and Yoongi, but you tune them out — it’s not like you understand what they’re saying anyway — to look at the field. The players have lifted Jungkook on their shoulders and he’s laughing, holding on to them so he doesn’t fall, and you grin.

“Come on,” Jin says, “let’s go congratulate him!”

That sounds like a terrible idea, you think. You won’t be the only ones, as the crowd has already invaded the field, and you doubt you’ll be able to get very close.

You still follow him. You alternate between clinging to his arm and to his shoulders so you don’t lose him, and trust him to elbow his way through the crowd. You hear him apologizing profusely in front of you, but he does not stop. Slowly, you make it down. Once you’re off the stairs, people are not as compactly gathered, and you can just walk between them. Jin grins at you, and you give him a thumbs up. Yeah, he did good here. You can give him that.

“Hey, Jungkook!” he calls out.

Jungkook was talking with some girls, but he looks up at the sound of his name, excuses himself, and jogs towards the two of you.

And it is then, in the few seconds it takes him to get to you, that it hits you. Like a ton of bricks.

You had known that Jungkook was objectively attractive, of course. There was no ignoring that. But Jin was objectively attractive, too, and that had never changed anything between the two of you. With Jungkook, right now, it does. His skin is glistening with sweat, and he wipes his chin with his shirt, and oh no, you can see his well-defined biceps and the line of his abs, and some hair is escaping from his ponytail, and he’s grinning with a happy, proud smile, and his eyes are shining and—

Jungkook is hot. That’s your realization. You had been aware of it, technically, but it’s like it only clicks for you at that exact moment.

“You came,” he tells you with a bright smile, and you can feel your entire face heating up. You pray that it’s not visible.

“Yeah,” you squeak out. “Great, um, great game?”

It sounds like an interrogation because you have no idea if it was one. It looked difficult, but maybe that was because they played terribly today. You don’t know that.

Jungkook’s smile widens a little, and you know that he has you all figured out. He knows you don’t understand the first thing about this whole thing.

“Thanks,” he still says.

His chest is still heaving quickly, and it draws your attention to his— his everything. The way he’s leaning towards you as he’s trying to catch his breath doesn’t help either. You wait for Jin to say something, to save you, but when you look around, you realize the traitor has abandoned you completely.

Okay, he hasn’t technically abandoned you, he’s just gone to congratulate Taehyung, but it’s the same difference.

You hear someone else calling Jungkook’s name before you’ve figured out what to say. He looks around, then gives you an apologetic look.

“Sorry, I—”

“No problem, you should— I have to go anyway.”

This is not like you. You’re an awkward person, and you struggle in social situations, but you don’t usually trip over your words like that. You kind of hate it.

“Okay, so, um, I’ll see you…?”

“Wednesday, yeah. Or— before. At lunch. If you’re there.”

This is terrible.

“Okay.” Jungkook gives you one last smile, and then he’s off, and you’re standing alone in the middle of a crowd. Your chest is heavy and it feels painful.

You hate this.

It’s only after that that you start realizing how big of a part Jungkook now plays in your life. He walks you home at night sometimes. You eat with him once or twice a week. You study together for an entire afternoon on Wednesdays. He’s just— everywhere. And it’s not that it’s a bad thing, because the feeling you get when you see him is a pleasant one, but it is disconcerting. It’s something that you have no control over whatsoever and that’s not— that’s not good for you.

You realize how much attention you were already paying to him, too, which is even more annoying. The signs were there. You should have understood this sooner. If you had, maybe you could have prevented it.

Because that’s the thing. You know the situation is ridiculous. You believe Jungkook sees you as a friend, and you’re happy with that, but there is no way he thinks of you as anything else. That is not an idea you should even begin to entertain. You can handle rejection, you’re used to it in so many aspects, though it’s rarely romantic, but you cannot take getting your hopes up only for them to be crushed.

The thing is, you can’t help it at this point, can’t force your feelings back in. There is so much to like about him. The way he plays with his hair, the quiet laughs when he’s in public, the loud ones when he’s walking you home, the sparkle in his eyes when he asks you a question in maths and it turns out he already had it right, the look on his face when he talks about basketball,… There’s so much.

You briefly consider avoiding him, but that’s not really an option. You like being his friend. You see your feelings as annoying, pesky little things that have no business being there in the first place. You don’t even hate the rush that goes through you when you see him, the way just looking at him brings a smile to your lips that you simply can’t hold back.

But you really, really hate the wishful thinking. The hope.

The feelings are fine, as long as you don’t think too hard about it. As long as he doesn’t have a girlfriend. Because that would break your heart.

And it’s only a matter of time before that happens.

You really considered declining when Jin asked you to come to this New Year’s party. Your last experience had effectively convinced you that those new parties he was getting invited to were not for you. That was fine, to each their own, but that did mean you didn’t really want to go. He clearly didn’t need you there anyway. You didn’t even know why he asked.

But he did, and he insisted, and he gave you his best puppy eyes, and that’s the thing about Jin: he’s very, very good at giving puppy eyes.

So that’s why you’re there, wearing a red dress that’s way too flashy for you, leaning against a wall and staring into the void. You feel empty and, though you’re not alone, lonely. You’re surrounded by strangers, and there are people everywhere in the house, but you don’t know them, and you can’t just start a conversation with them. It’s not something you do, it’s not even something you want.

You haven’t felt the urge to lock yourself inside a closet yet, though, so you guess that’s an improvement compared to last time.

Looking around, you can see Jimin, perched on the counter, listening to Yoongi talk with a smile on his face. Jin is somewhere else in the room and, though you can’t see him, you sometimes hear him, so you know he has his flirting voice on. Namjoon is nowhere to be seen, but that’s probably a good sign. He always get lucky at those parties. You don’t know how he does it. It’s impressive, honestly. Hoseok showed up earlier, and everyone greeted him like he was a star — which is kind of accurate, actually, at the campus’ scale.

You know, of course, that Jungkook and Taehyung, as inseparable as ever, are by the pool table. You also hate that you know it, because now your mind is constantly wondering if it’s weird that you haven’t been there yet, or if it would be weird to show up. Neither, probably, because exactly no one cares except for you, but you’re the master of torturing yourself with useless considerations.

God, you hate having a crush. It’s just so— unpractical. You also hate that you didn’t see that one coming, and that you didn’t do anything about it until it was too late. Usually, you’re pretty good at nipping those kinds of feelings in the bud. Now, you can only wait it out.

With a sigh, you push yourself away from the wall to wander aimlessly around the house. You promised Jin you’d stay until midnight, and you intend to keep that promise. It’s not like there’s anything for you to do, but still, that way you can look like you’re doing something and look a little less weird. Or maybe you don’t. It doesn’t really matter anyway.

Passing in front of the room with the pool table, you realize that Jungkook is gone. Taehyung is still there, playing with Hoseok, both looking pretty wasted, but Jungkook has vanished. That’s not good. You don’t want him to spring up on you out of nowhere like he did last time. You won’t know how to react if that happens, probably fumble for words, and it will be very unpleasant and very embarrassing for everyone.

You consider finding another closet, then decides against it. There’s just fifteen minutes left until midnight, anyway. That’s not too long. You can just wait it out.

You slowly make your way through the house. No sign of Jungkook anywhere. Maybe he left. Maybe he’s already back to the pool table and you missed him completely. Maybe he’s locked himself in a room with a girl and—

Oh you hate this. You hate feeling jealous. You hate that you have no control over it, you hate that it makes you sad, you hate that you have no right to feel like that. Jungkook isn’t yours. He’s probably even considered you for anything. You should consider yourself lucky you’re even friends with him in the first place.

You do your best to push everything out of your mind. Alcohol has never looked more tempting, but you don’t want the hangover with the morning, so you ignore the inviting bottles of beer and walk out.

It’s freezing — of course it’s freezing, it’s December you idiot, is there anything you can do right tonight — and you shiver, but you stay there. The cold is both numbing and soothing, and while you’re mentally complaining about it, you’re not thinking about anything else, so that’s good.

The door opens and closes behind you, and you guess someone is coming out to smoke. You move over to give them some space, but just as you do that, a jacket falls over your shoulders. You jump at first, and then the warmth makes you sigh in relief.

“You shouldn’t go out without a coat,” Jungkook says, because of course it’s him.

“I feel that you’ve been scolding me a lot recently,” you chuckle, glancing up at him.

He pouts, buries his hands in his pockets. He’s obviously cold as well, but at least his shirt covers his arms.

It also hugs his muscles real nice, but that’s besides the point.

“That’s because you make very poor decisions,” he mutters, looking at his feet. “You have to realize that.”

“You’re right. I could have taken my coat outside.”

“You know that walking back all alone in the middle of the night is way worse,” he protests, and then you laugh, because that’s exactly what you wanted, and he goes quiet for a second. “Don’t make fun of me,” he mumbles, looking away from you again.

“I’m not,” you say, and you take a step in his direction so you can bump your shoulder against his. “You shouldn’t worry that much, but I think it’s nice that you do. I was just trying to get a rise out of you.”

“That worked really well,” he says, and he sounds surprised about it. You wonder if it’s because he usually doesn’t get angry for stuff, but you can’t tell for sure. “Hey, you—”

People start shouting numbers inside, and you turn around to look at them.

“It’s midnight,” you say.

“Five!”

You look up at Jungkook. He’s significantly taller than you. Not as much as Namjoon, but still.

“Four!”

Jungkook looks back at you, smiles, and it takes your breath away. His hair looks very good like that, you think absent-mindedly, with the way it falls on either side of his face.

“Three!”

It’s too late to go back inside now. It would definitely be a weird thing to do. Which means you’re here, alone, with Jungkook.

“Two!”

Your eyes flicker to his lips. You wonder what it would be like to kiss them. You haven’t let yourself even consider it before, but right now your brain isn’t functioning all that well. Probably because of how loud your heart is beating in your chest.

“One!”

You look back up and his eyes are wide and focused on you. There’s that same tension in his shoulders as when you first met him, except, back then, he couldn’t look at you, and now it seems that he can’t look away.

“Happy new year!”

You decide you shouldn’t think about your next move. You get on your tiptoes to plant a kiss at the corner of his lips, right at the border between friends and something else, but he leans forward right at that moment, and his hands cup your face, and then he’s kissing you.

It’s like an explosion. You don’t know what you should focus on. How warm he is, how soft and large his hands are, how his lips move against yours, how he tastes, or simply the fact that he’s kissing you, Jungkook is kissing you!

The door slams open, and the two of you move away in a jump.

“Happy new year Jungkook!” Taehyung shouts, obviously drunk, soon joined by several other members of the basketball team. If he’s seen what happened, he doesn’t say anything, and you doubt Taehyung would have that kind of control over himself.

Soon, Jungkook is surrounded and they start to drag him back inside. He gives you a brief, apologetic look, then follows them, laughing. You remain there, frozen, unsure of what to do. You take a hesitant step towards the door, only to see a girl planting kisses on his cheeks while he blushes. What gets to you, though, is the arm he’s wrapped around her, the way he’s tracing circles on the naked skin of her shoulder. It makes the gesture look… intimate. Personal.

You let out a brief, bitter laugh, that there is fortunately no one to hear. You feel confused, but mostly, you feel stupid.

Fuck that.

It doesn’t take long for you to drop the jacket onto a chair and find your coat. You wish a happy new year to Namjoon, when you pass by him on your way out, and he looks a little surprised, like he hasn’t heard the shouting. You don’t want to know what he could have been up to.

You’ve kept your end of the bargain, you think as you leave. Jin won’t be able to complain to you. You feel some petty sort of satisfaction when you step outside and find yourself alone alone, finally. You like this. You like being alone. You’ve never asked for anything else.

You give one last look to the party, then vanish into the night. You’re better off on your own anyway.

“I don’t think I’ll be coming,” you say, nonchalantly, as everyone around the table is talking animatedly about a party for the next week-end.

You had hoped it would go unnoticed in the middle of the conversation, but, unfortunately, that doesn’t go as planned. Taehyung turns horrified eyes towards you, Jin, Namjoon and Yoongi all look surprised, and Jungkook… You don’t know how to read him. There’s that surprise, as well, but then he looks down before you can tell anything else. Not that that changes much. He’s barely looked at you today.

You haven’t talked to him since New Year’s Eve. You had other things on your mind, and then he didn’t show up at the library last Wednesday.

“What do you mean, you won’t be coming?” Jin asks. “You always come to parties.”

You shrug. You don’t miss the alarmed looks your friends are exchanging, and you’re sure Namjoon can see through you. Because it’s not like you to do something like that, whatever reason you may give.

“I don’t like them. They’re too loud, and I can’t say that I really enjoy standing alone for half the night.”

“You could stay with us,” Namjoon offers.

“And watch you pick up a girl every time? No thank you,” you reply with a disgusted shiver.

“You could stay with me,” Yoongi says.

You give him a look, and he grimaces, backing down immediately. Okay. He can see why you wouldn’t want that either. Plus he’s pretty sure that Jimin and him are about to get it on after weeks of flirting, so it’s probably not a great idea.

“What about me?” Jin asks. He doesn’t sound as energetic as usual, his voice almost quiet, and you realize that he probably feels bad because of what you said. He knows you come to those parties because of him, so knowing you don’t have fun at all when you’re attending — you understand that he might feel responsible.

“I think I would bore you very quickly,” you chuckle. “You’re not going to get the fun you want with me. But it’s fine, really. I tried it, and now I know it’s not for me. I can just—”

“No,” Taehyung says.

You blink.

“No?”

“I’m taking this personally,” he tells you, looking you dead in the eye. “You’re coming to this party and I’m going to make you enjoy yourself.”

You’ve never seen him so serious, and you can’t help it. You burst out laughing.

“Taehyung,” you say softly when you’re done. “I appreciate that, I do, but I don’t want to do that anymore.”

Taehyung opens his mouth, then winces and closes it. You’re not sure what happened there, but he gives Jungkook an offended look.

“I’m sorry,” you add. “I’m sure your parties can be great, but—”

“I get it,” he sighs. “But you owe me.”

You’re not sure why, but fine.

“And you can’t say anything bad about those parties, to anyone. Ever.” In that moment, he looks almost threatening, and you blink, confused. He can’t possibly take it that seriously, can he?

Then he yelps and rubs his leg. He gives Jungkook another annoyed look, but Jungkook doesn’t even look up from his food.

“Leave her alone,” he just mumbles.

Taehyung rolls his eyes, but doesn’t add anything. He does give you a long, pointed glance, though, before muttering under his breath something that sounds a lot like “I won’t let that slander stand,” and you think that’s hilarious too.

When you risk a glance at Jungkook, his arms are folded over his chest, and he looks deep in thought. He’s chewing on his bottom lip, eyes focused on his meal, though he’s not touching it. It’s stupid, but the image of a child that has just been scolded flashes in your mind.

“Jungkook? Is everything alright?”

He jumps at your question, looks at you like a deer caught in headlights. Your eyes meet, but it’s extremely brief, and your chest tightens. This sucks. You thought the two of you had gotten past that now, and you hate that you lost what you had. It’s not like it’s your fault. He kissed you, and then he bailed on you first chance he got. Why would he do that, why would he risk it, if he was going to react like that afterwards?

“I’m fine,” he says with a tense smile, and you doubt it’s true, but you don’t know what you should ask him to confront him about it. You don’t want to talk about the kiss ever again. You certainly don’t want to do it in front of your friends.

So you jump on the first chance you get to leave the table. You don’t ask yourself if it’s a weird thing to do. It probably is, but fuck it, you’re weird, and everyone else can deal with it. You refuse to subject yourself to something unpleasant longer than absolutely necessary.

Except the looks you get are mostly concerned ones, from Namjoon and Jin. Jungkook does look up as you walk away, eyes following you almost longingly, and then he lets out a long sigh that catches Taehyung’s attention. He doesn’t say anything, but he narrows his eyes at him.

God. He really has to get everything done here, doesn’t he?

At first, you think that this is it. Your— your whatever it was that you had with Jungkook is over. You’ll see him around every now and then, and maybe he’ll give you a polite nod, though it doesn’t look like he would even do that right now, but there won’t be anything else. You’ll go back to being basically strangers, and it will be fine, because really, nothing happened there, right? You had a crush on him, he kissed you once, and then nothing. It’s fine. You’ll be fine.

Sure, it makes you a little sad. Sure, you catch yourself looking at him while he’s surrounded by girls who are all so much better for him than you ever were, and it hurts a little. Sure, walking back home alone at night is a little more unpleasant than it used to be, but that’s the thing. It’s only a little. You would almost pat yourself on the back for it. Congrats, (Y/N). You made it out before you got too attached. You probably avoided a world of hurt.

Because you know. You know that if you had gotten in too deep, it would have hurt like hell to not have Jeon Jungkook. And sure, it hurts right now.

But only a little.

You’re good. You’re safe. You know that Namjoon and Yoongi would nod if you told them about it. They understand, in a way a lot of other people don’t. You don’t think that Jin would, for example. He would tell you to take the risk, not understanding that people like Jungkook used to pick you last for their teams when you were in high school, not understanding that as far as you’re concerned, you’ve handled more than enough rejection throughout your life. But Namjoon and Yoongi… They’re definitely more successful than you in matters of the heart, but they would still understand. Not that you’re going to tell them about it, because it’s a stupid story, because there never was anything there, and because you’d feel really dumb talking about how you thought, how you hoped that— You’re not going to tell them anything. At least everything’s okay now.

And then, Jungkook appears at your usual table at the library on a Wednesday afternoon. He drops his bag on the floor and takes a seat next to you. You’re surprised to see him when you look up, too focused on your studies to notice him approaching. He has big, wide doe eyes, and he watches your reaction carefully.

“You’re— This seat isn’t taken?”

You shake your head. No. People rarely come here, and you don’t really study with people. Well, didn’t, you suppose.

“Do you mind if I sit here?“

“The seat’s free. You can take it if you want.”

You don’t know what to do. You don’t know how to react. This wasn’t supposed to happen. You never considered that Jungkook would— That he would—

“I, um, I like studying with you. It helps me focus,” he says, eyes flickering away from you. “So, if you don’t mind I’ll— Can I come back here on Wednesdays?”

You want to tell him that you can’t stop him, that he can do whatever the hell he want, but even though it’s on the tip of your tongue, you don’t.

“Of course you can,” you say instead.

Jungkook looks up long enough to flash you a smile, and you know. This isn’t over, and you’re not going to be fine. You’re probably going to feel crushed, sooner than later, and you could have stopped it all right now.

You think about Yoongi and how not like him it is to be doing what he is with Jimin. How he’s taking a risk. How it could oh so easily not have paid off.

It’s going to, of course. You just need to look at Jimin’s eyes when he’s talking to Yoongi to know that. But Jungkook doesn’t look at you like that. Jungkook doesn’t look at you at all.

And yet here you are. Taking that exact same risk.

God. You can be so stupid some times.

Jungkook glances at you quickly while you’re deep in thought, tapping your pencil against your cheek, and a small smile forms on his lips. He’s quick to glance away, because he would hate it if you caught him, of course, but the smile doesn’t fade.

He couldn’t have forced it to do so if he tried.

“You have to come to the next game.”

“Taehyung, hey, nice to see you to, I’m doing fine, I—”

“I’m serious, (Y/N). I know you hate basketball and everything that breathes, but—”

“I don’t hate you.”

“—this is really important and— Wait, really? Thank you. I feel that means a lot coming from you.”

“Is that how you see me? I don’t hate everyone, Taehyung.”

“Can you give me a list of people you don’t hate?”

“Well, you, Jin, Yoongi, Namjoon…”

“Jungkook?”

“…Sure. Jungkook. Why do you want me to come to the next game?”

“Because we might lose.”

“And I’m supposed to change that how?”

“You owe me, remember?”

“I— Because of the parties? Seriously? I need to sit through hours of you guys running after a ball because I don’t like parties?”

“I would really appreciate it if you could avoid describing basketball as ‘guys running after a ball’.”

“I would really appreciate not having to go watch the game.”

“Don’t you want to support your friends on the team?”

“Ugh. Fine. I’ll be there. Just— stop that thing you’re doing with your eyebrows. Why are you even doing that?”

“You’re so slow. How are you so slow? I thought you were supposed to be smart!”

“Taehyung…”

“Just be there!”

“I will.”

“You better!”

“Or what, what will you— Taehyung! You can’t just run off like— Well. I guess he could.”

You hadn’t thought sitting through a basketball game could become a more painful experience to you than it already was. As it turns out, you were wrong. It was so much worse when the people you wanted to win were losing. Despite yourself, you found yourself getting invested, standing up and shouting encouragements along with Jin and Namjoon, and protesting loudly when things didn’t go your way.

You were not cut out for this. Not because you still didn’t understand half the rules — you could have by now if you had made the effort of memorizing them — but because of the stress. God, how did your friends handle that regularly? How did the players handle it? You kept looking at Jungkook. You could tell how unhappy he was with the situation, could see the disappointment settling in. He also seemed to get more nervous as time went by, which didn’t help his performance, and his words kept echoing in your mind.

”I don’t know what’s going to happen when I stop being as good.”

You’re half way through the game and things are not looking good when Taehyung waves you over. You run to the railway, straining to hear him, and when you finally understand what he’s saying, you regret making any effort at all.

“You can’t possibly be serious!”

But he is.

“You owe me, (Y/N)!”

“I’m already— What’s it even going to do?”

“Trust me on that one, okay?”

You glare at him, but he’s looking at you with his beautiful brown eyes, and there’s nothing you can do against that. You sigh deeply. Your heart is beating wildly in your chest just thinking about what he’s asking you to do. Maybe it’s not such a big deal for him, that sort of stuff, but for you— For you it’s downright insane to even consider.

“Kim Taehyung,” you hiss through gritted teeth, “if this goes bad, I’ll kill you and plant your head on a stick outside of my door to warn my enemies not to underestimate me.”

He has the audacity to shrug at that.

“It won’t go bad.”

You look up. Take a deep breath. And call Jungkook’s name.

The gym is insanely loud, and it takes both you and Taehyung’s efforts, as well as a lot of waving, for Jungkook to notice you. When he does, though, he runs towards you, worry obvious on his face. He’s looking directly at you for once, and the intensity of his stare almost makes you shiver.

“Is everything alright?” he asks when he gets there, eyes scanning you quickly to make sure that you’re okay.

“It’s fine, I just—”

“What are you doing here? You hate basketball. Did something happen?”

You shake your head. You don’t know how you’re supposed to do this, especially when he’s looking so puzzled and when he’s questioning your sanity for showing up at one of his games. You glance over at Taehyung who gives you a decided nod.

Ah. Fuck it.

Leaning over about as far as you can go, you cup Jungkook’s face, and as his expression turns to one of surprise, you kiss him. If people around notice or have a reaction, you can’t tell, because Jungkook pushes himself against you and buries his hand in your hair as he holds you. There’s not much space left for thinking in your mind, instead entirely consumed by thoughts of him. He’s completely sober this time, and you don’t taste alcohol on his tongue. He’s also not going as slow, almost desperately kissing you back, one strong hand supporting you so you don’t fall over, and you just melt.

It takes everything in you to push yourself away. When you do, you’re breathless, and he’s staring at you with eyes even wider than usual. You’re pretty sure Taehyung would want you to give an encouraging speech right now, but you don’t want to do that right now.

“I really don’t care if you’re winning or losing games,” you say instead. “If you’re sad, I’ll be sad with you, but it’s never going to change anything in how I see you. But I’ll be here encouraging you.”

He grabs your hand, squeezing it tight.

“Promise?” he asks, almost childishly.

You’re not sure which part he’s referring to, but they’re all true, so you nod.

“I promise.”

He smiles, and then both him and Taehyung are running back across the field and getting yelled at by their coach, but even from where you’re standing, you can see their smiles.

You guess that means you’re not going to murder Taehyung.

“This is actually insane. How is Jungkook even doing that?” Yoongi asks in disbelief after Jungkook scored extremely impressively yet again, and you fidget in your seat. You’re very happy to see that, though you don’t how you feel about the smug looks Taehyung is sending you, but you don’t want—

“It’s the power of love,” Jin says, nodding like he just gave an essential truth to the meaning of life.

—this. You, very specifically, don’t want this.

“Jin,” you sigh, “there’s no such thing as—”

“Actually,” Namjoon interrupts you, “I think he’s right. The power of love is a thing, and I think this is a perfect demonstration of it.”

You gape at him, in shock. He betrayed you?

“Did you just—”

“Namjoon’s right,” Yoongi nods. “This is how the power of love works. You take love, and you turn it into strength.”

And then, him, Jin and Namjoon high five, and you gasp. Traitors. All of them.

But after that, Jimin says off-handedly “Maybe you should come and kiss me before my next competition” and Yoongi’s brain visibly stops functioning, so you consider yourself avenged.

After the match, you wait for Jungkook outside of the locker room. Jin insisted you should go celebrate on the field, but you had declined. It felt like the situation required something a little more private, so now you’re here, leaning against the wall, looking at your phone so you’ll seem busy, even if there’s nothing on there to occupy yourself.

You’re not the only one there, and that doesn’t help soothing your nerves. There are a lot of girls, all pretty and smiling. It makes you feel like a groupie, and you don’t like it. You’re relieved for a second when the door opens and the team comes out, but it doesn’t last long, because the girls are soon surrounding them. You remain where you were standing, watching the whole thing happen. It takes a few moments before you notice Jungkook’s bun standing out of the group, and it makes you smile.

You catch Taehyung’s eye first, and, after you’ve sent him a glare that you hope was threatening, he pushes Jungkook out of the group. At first, he seems confused, before he finally finds you. You wave at him hesitantly. He blinks a few times, his eyes wide, then walks towards you.

“Hey,” he says when he joins you. He’s towering over you. Usually, you don’t like that, and you’ve complained about having to look up at Namjoon more than once, but you don’t necessarily mind right now.

“Hey,” you reply.

Silence stretches between the two of you as you try to think of something to say. You should have prepared a speech, you know that, but you’re pretty sure you wouldn’t have been able to say it either.

“Taehyung told me he told you to kiss me,” Jungkook blurts out after a while, looking away from you, and you give him a surprised glance. “So, you don’t have to—”

“No, I wanted to kiss you,” you interrupt him, a puzzled frown forming on your face.

Jungkook’s head whips back towards you, and you just stare at him in confusion.

“Do you really think I would have kissed you just because Taehyung asked me to?”

“Well you— you came to the game because he asked you to, right?”

“That’s not the same—”

“Jungkook!” someone from the team calls. “We’re going to grab a bite to celebrate, do you wanna come?”

Jungkook sighs, then gives you a sharp look.

“You wanted to kiss me,” he repeats.

You nod.

“Why?”

You bite your lower lip, and you’re not oblivious to the way his eyes fall to your mouth when you do.

“And I’m the blunt one,” you mumble.

“Sorry, I–”

“No, no, it’s fine, it’s just— I wanted to kiss you because I like you. Obviously.”

Jungkook swallows, and you can see his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down. He looks over his shoulder at his friends.

“You can go without me!”

There are some protests, but he ignores them to give you his entire attention. It’s… not an unpleasant feeling.

“You disappeared after I kissed you the last time,” he says.

“You left,” you protest immediately. “You kissed me, and then the second your friends arrived, you acted like nothing happened and you left.”

“I didn’t want to— I just— They’re really annoying about that stuff, you know? I thought it would probably be better if I talked to you after— ‘m sorry. I didn’t— didn’t realize it—”

You look at Jungkook, watch him fumbling for words, and it hits you like a ton of bricks, how much you do like him. Those words really don’t do it justice, and maybe you’re not quite ready to talk about love just yet, but you like him so much, so much it makes your heart swell, so much you don’t think what what he’s trying to tell you would change anything to it, and yet what he’s trying to say is exactly what prompts your realization. He didn’t want to hurt you. Wanted this to be private, for just the two of you, wanted to see how you felt about it. And maybe he went the wrong way about it, but it means everything that he was trying.

“Walk me home?” you ask.

Jungkook finally stops his rambling.

“Are you sure?”

Of course, he has to ask that now, after weeks of trying to convince him to let you walk on your own. Still, you smile and nod, and when you start walking side by side, you grab his hand. He freezes temporarily before grinning and squeezing your hand, pulling it into his pocket so you won’t be too cold, because the air of January is chilling.

“Congratulations for the game,” you say after a long, comfortable silence. You had almost forgotten about it.

“Thanks,” he chuckles. “I had some help.”

And then, he winks at you, and your heart misses a beat. That’s when you understand something you hadn’t even considered before: if Jungkook stops being shy around you, you’re done for. You’ll be the one constantly flustered.

“So,” you say, slowly, trying to keep yourself composed, “why did you kiss me?”

“Um. Same as you?” Jungkook’s confidence disappears, and he returns to his awkward self, and you see that, as much as you like it, you want him to be comfortable around you. But that doesn’t mean you can’t tease him a little.

“What do you mean by that?” you ask innocently.

He gives you a horrified look that soon turns to an offended one when he notices you grinning widely.

“You’re so mean,” he says, but he’s smiling too, “you’re the meanest person I know.”

You’re laughing at that point, as you stop in front of your dorm.

“That’s not an answer.”

“Fine,” he sighs dramatically. “I kissed you because I like you.”

It’s funny. You knew that was what he was going to say, knew it was coming, and yet it gets to you all the same.

“With you, I don’t feel like I have to be the school’s star, you know? I can just be— Jungkook. You don’t expect me to be anything else.”

He’s right. You like Jungkook. With his insecurities and his flaws. You don’t want him to perform for you, and you don’t care what he’s doing right and wrong. Just studying maths in the library with him makes you happy.

He eyes your dorm and takes a deep breath.

“I should go,” he says.

You hum.

“Yes, it would be a really bad idea if you came up tonight.”

But you’re not letting go of his hand, and he’s close to you now, close enough that you can feel his breath catching in his throat. It makes you smile.

“You’re so mean,” he repeats.

This time, instead of laughing, you kiss him, and it’s completely different from the two previous times. There is no uncertainty in this kiss, no surprise, no pressure, no fear. It’s perfect. Jungkook’s hand comes to cup your cheek, his lips soft against your own. His long fingers gently stroke your jaw as he keeps the kiss chaste and sweet. It only makes you yearn for more and when he moves away, you can see in his eyes that he wants more as well.

You just don’t think he wants it now.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, then?” you ask.

“I’ll meet you for lunch,” he says solemnly, and it rings like a promise, which makes you smile.

When you move away, though, he doesn’t let go of you, and a pouty expression appears on his face before he releases you.

“I— Yeah. You should go.”

“You can come up if you want to, you know?”

He hesitates, rolls his lips together.

“I want to savor this,” he admits to you in a near whisper.

“Then I’ll go.”

“Yes. Good night.”

“Good night.”

You feel light and giddy as you walk through the door. It’s a nice and strange feeling, like you could just start floating any second.

You already can’t wait for the next day.

People are definitely weirded out by your relationship with Jungkook. Or, rather, by Jungkook’s relationship with you. You’re pretty sure most of the people who give you weird looks when you sit next to him and he wraps his arm around you, or when you walk hand in hand, wouldn’t pay attention to you if you went to class naked. But they all know who Jungkook is, and you guess it is weird to see you in conjunction with him.

They could ignore it and consider you mere part of the scenery when he ate with you, you suppose, but it is harder to do now. You’re not too fond of being the center of attention, to be honest. You don’t know how Jungkook does it.

What takes you by surprise the most is people being nice to you. That confuses you to no end, because you know for a fact they don’t care about you, not really, and you cannot fathom what they think they’re going to get out of this. You’re pretty sure there are a girl or two who are doing that to get closer to Jungkook, and some, you think, have decided to be nice to you because they think that if Jungkook likes you, you can’t be a total lost cause.

You don’t like that feeling. Not at all. You don’t like it when you’re going to class, you don’t like it during lunch, and you definitely, definitely do not like it when people rush towards you the second you get to a party.

Yeah, you’re giving Taehyung what he wanted, in the end. He said that both you and Jungkook owed him, because without him you wouldn’t be together, and you eventually gave in.

You thought it would be fine, now that you have someone to spend time with, but you understand with horror that your status has changed now. You’re not invisible anymore. You’re Jungkook’s girlfriendTM. Because of that, you spend much longer in the entrance making small talk than you would have wished to, and you’re stopped a couple of times while you’re desperately looking for your boyfriend to save you from this hell on earth.

You’re not surprised at all to find him playing beer pong with Taehyung and other guys from the team. He hasn’t gotten time to get drunk yet, so he’s quite impressive, but then again, they all are. That’s why they usually end up wasted.

The second he sees you, though, he abandons the game completely, and the smile on his face threatens to make your heart explode in your chest. Some of the guys turn around to look at you, give you a wave or a smile. Taehyung shouts a greeting.

“Hey,” Jungkook says, leaning in to press a quick kiss on your lips. He doesn’t like PDA all that much, but he never misses a chance to kiss you, and the thought makes you all giddy.

“Hey. Are you, um, having fun there?”

He shrugs.

“It’s not that bad. Wanna play?” He waits for your expression to turn to one of horror as you try to refuse politely before laughing. “Just kidding. Don’t worry about it.”

You let out a relieved breath. You know you and Jungkook are very different people, and you’re doing your best to take an interest in the things he likes. You’ve been learning the rules of basketball, for example, and though you still don’t believe you get the point, you like the way his eyes shine when you say something right about a game.

But you don’t take part in any of that stuff. Okay, you stop at that field that’s on your way home from the library every now and again, but that doesn’t count. It’s just you and him then, and you feel good and relaxed. You’ve even scored a couple of times now.

“Come on, I want to grab a drink,” Jungkook said, taking your hand in his, and you follow without protesting.

It’s probably your second mistake of the night: not realizing that getting a drink with and without Jungkook are two very different ordeals. On your way there, you get roped into several conversations. Those are fine. You can’t say you enjoy them, but they’re fine, and it’s not like those people are actually talking to you anyway.

What you genuinely dislike is that, when you’re by the table with the drinks, a girl starts openly flirting with your boyfriend. It’s not subtle, either, with the way she keeps touching his arm and how she laughs at his every word.

For a while, you just stare in disbelief. You know Jungkook is oblivious to that sort of things — probably one more reason why he likes how blunt you are — but you can’t believe her. You wouldn’t necessarily blame the girl for trying, either, if she didn’t know about you. Jungkook’s quite the catch after all, and you understand liking him better than anyone else.

No, it’s the fact that she’s doing it right in front of you, while Jungkook is holding your hand. It feels so— dismissive. So insulting. She’s not exactly saying to your face that she doesn’t take you seriously, but she might as well.

You watch incredulously when she puts her hand on his arm one more time. You don’t know how you’re supposed to handle that, so you just tug on Jungkook’s hand a little awkwardly. You’re pleased by how quickly his attention snaps to you, even while the girl is in the middle of her sentence. It’s a petty sentiment, for sure, but you can’t help it.

“Everything okay?” he asks. “Is it too loud in here?”

“Kind of, but—”

“Let’s find you a quieter place.”

He forgets about the drink he wanted to get, forgets about the girl, who he abandons there unceremoniously, gently pulling you through the room. Next thing you know, he’s carefully closing the doors of the closet he’s found for the two of you behind you.

“There,” he says, sounding satisfied with himself. “Better?”

You chuckle at that and, guessing for him in the half-light, you pull him towards you for a kiss. You press your body against his, pushing him against the back of the closet, and a groan forms in his throat. His hands tighten around you, sending shivers through your entire being, and you only lean into him more. You run your fingers over his chest, just to feel him tremble under your touch and he does, hissing with pleasure at the contact.

“Fuck,” he mumbles into your mouth. “Was that— was that what you had in mind?”

You shake your head, and he’s close enough to feel it.

“That girl was flirting with you,” you tell him.

“Oh. Are you sure?”

You are.

“So… are you jealous? Because that’s kind of hot.”

You laugh softly. Truth is, you really, really don’t want to be the jealous girlfriend, but Jungkook actually sounds happy about the idea.

“You really didn’t notice?”

There’s a moment of silence.

“I didn’t. Does that— Did it bother you, that she was doing that?”

“Kind of,” you shrug. “What about you? You’re— cool with that?”

“If it bothers you I don’t like it,” he replies simply, one of his hand leaving your waist to grab yours and squeeze it gently. “I’m sorry I didn’t notice.”

That makes you chuckle.

“How didn’t you? She would have made it barely more obvious if she had started undressing herself.”

Jungkook has an awkward laugh, and you can feel his breath on your face. He starts fidgeting, but then you press a kiss right at the corner of his lips, and he calms down, if just a little.

“It’s— You have to promise you won’t make fun of me.”

“I won’t.”

He hesitates a second longer, as though he’s trying to judge your sincerity by looking at you — except, of course, he can barely see a thing in here. You kiss him again, following his jaw, and he finally gives in when you start making your way down his neck.

“When I’m with you, it’s like my vision narrows on you,” he says, voice low. “I know everything and everyone else is still there, but I just think about you. Sorry, it’s really stupid.”

“It’s not,” you say, shaking your head, wondering if he can feel your heart beating stupidly fast in your chest, all because his words make you feel like nothing else ever has before. “But I’m— I’m kind of boring. That can’t be fun.”

“You’re not boring,” he protests. “You listen to people, even when you don’t look like it. You always look like you have a thousand things on your mind but you always make time for your friends, and when you’re studying here, you play with your hair.” He twirls a lock of your hair around one of his fingers before releasing it, as if to demonstrate. “You’re a very, very interesting person to look at.”

The only thing you can do is stay there, frozen in his arms, after he’s said that. You may be blunt, but Jungkook is honest. Devastatingly so. His vulnerability always shatters the walls that you’ve built around yourself, and you still don’t know how to react when that happens.

So you push yourself on your tiptoes to kiss him again, except this time it’s slow and gentle and you’re trying to put everything he means to you into it. The tip of your fingers are on his cheeks, your mouth barely moving against his, soft noises filling the closet. Jungkook remains still, letting you in complete control, like he’s afraid he could break you if he moved.

“Thank you,” you whisper when you pull away from him.

“For what?” he asks, breathless.

“For being here with me tonight, and for coming with me at that first party.”

“Of course. Any time.”

He lets himself fall to the floor, taking you down with him and keeping you into his lap once he’s done that. You rest your head against his chest. You hear the noises of the party still going on outside, but Jungkook is your island of peace in the middle of the chaos.

“I think I’m going to stop basketball,” Jungkook blurts out without a warning, and you look at him, surprised.

“Really?” you ask.

“Yeah. Really. I just— I don’t want to be doing that anymore.”

You think about it for a few seconds, then nod.

“You probably should stop, in that case.”

“People are… not going to be happy about it.”

“I’m sure Taehyung won’t be mad at you. Well, not for too long.”

He laughs softly, but his hold on you doesn’t relax, and you know that this was hard for him to even consider. You know it’s a terrifying decision to take, too.

“Thank you,” he says. “For being here with me tonight, too.”

“Any time.”

The truth is, you wouldn’t give that moment away for anything in the world, and something tells you Jungkook wouldn’t either. It’s not ideal, it’s not perfect, but you don’t believe there is such a thing, and you’re happy to satisfy yourself with the imperfect.

But any moment you can spend in Jungkook is as close to perfect as can be.

“I love you,” he whispers in your ear, and you think that he might feels the same way, which almost makes you burst with happiness.

“And I love you,” you whisper back.

Not perfect, perhaps. But close enough.

#jungkook x reader #bts #bts imagine #bts x reader #jeon jungkook x reader #jungkook imagine #jungkook fluff #bts fic #jungkook fanfic #jungkook #jeon jungkook #candywrites

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prodtrouver · 3 years

Text

Catch These Hands • Choi Beomgyu

Never ever have she felt so comfortable in another school with her old friends. Everyone was friendly and out-going, it was easy to approach everyone. That's how you could make friends despite your short time at school. However, you never expected such a quiet boy to be alone by himself, always watching you and your friends play away.

Pairing: volleyball player! Beomgyu x volleyball player!fem reader

Other characters: Volleyball player! Heeseung, NCT DREAM, a brief appearance of an old friend! Jungwon.

Genre/warning: introvert-extrovert pair, slight angst, fluff, feeling of left out, sport-romance, slow-burn

no. of words: 3.4k words

You watched the 4 boys challenge each other in a game is basketball. Laughter and mad screams fill the court. Smiles clear on their faces as one of them tried to snatch the ball from the other. Today was a good day, the warm sun covered by a few clouds, the breeze was perfect, and well- breezy.

“y/n, come join us!” Huening Kai yelled, but you shook your head. “I don’t want to play with giants,” you chuckled. They all pouted but went back to playing.

Soobin ran away from Yeonjun, the ball being dribbled by the taller. The next second, he did a lay-up and the boys groan. “Round isn’t over!” You called out, and Taehyun snatched the ball from Soobin.

Once again, you laughed but noticed a figure on the side of your eyes. You look at the bench across from you and see a boy. It’s him again...

His eyes glued on the 4 boys who looked too focused in the game. Suddenly, his eyes met yours and moments flashes in your head...

You bolted down the stairs of your home, and you heard your brother scolding you for your actions.

“I’m not even hurt, Jeno!” You stated, thrilled to finally transfer schools. Jeno pouts at you before he carefully places the plate in front of you. Truth to be told, you are excited, however, nervous. Many of your other friends claimed that the school you’re transferring to is so friendly and jolly.

You don’t know for real, but you are curious how your first day will go. You dropped your spoon when you heard the doorbell ring throughout your house. Jeno quickly gets the door and was greeted by the joyful and giggly voices of his friends.

“where’s our precious y/n?” You bounced off your chair when you heard Jaemin call for your name. His voice like honey and almost motherly will always soothe you. You just love the boy, maybe even more than Jeno.

You jumped into his arms and he laughed before he spun you around. He kissed your head and greeted you a good morning.

“Aw, look at you in another school uniform! I’m going to miss you so much,” Jaemin pretends to cry.

“Yeah! Who am I going to argue with now?” Chenle sulks, but you laugh as a reply.

“Do you want to come in or not?” Jeno said, and they all came in. Soon, a plentiful of food filled your dining table and everyone was getting excited.

You get ready your bag for you will leave any minute. You reached your hand out to grab a piece of candy coin, only for it to touch another person’s hand.

“Sorry,” the boy spoke. You grabbed a few chocolate coins and avoided the eyes of Donghyuck, your ex.

“Y/n, be careful, okay? I hope you have a positive first day!” Jisung shouted as they watched you put on your shoes.

“Yeah!” You shouted before you opened the door. One of your feet already outside the house.

“Don’t forget our volleyball practice after school, though!” And you locked the door.

You take a deep sigh before finally walking to your new school.As soon as you stepped into the building, eyes were on you. They didn’t go unnoticed by you either; it puzzled you instead. You think that you won’t suit in.

You pull out the laminated paper from your bag. Color coded boxes to symbolize your subjects for that time. Classroom numbers on top of those boxes.

Speedily, you searched for your classroom. After all, it would be terrible for you if you’re late on the first day.

Unfortunately, you crashed into someone.

“I’m sorry!” You spoke and grabbed your schedule from the side. Your eyes met the eyes of the person you crashed into.

They were lovely, almost mesmerizing to look at, but his voice cut your trance off.

“It’s okay,” he said, and helped you stand up. Instantly, he walked away. Your eyes followed him, but you went back to looking for your first classroom.

When you found the room, you were greeted by a shout. “GOOD MORNING, LEE Y/N!”

You jumped and some of them laughed at you. The boy who yelled quickly made his way towards you. He took your hands in his and laughed widely.

“I’m Huening Kai, nice to meet you!” He said and pulled you to a higher level of seating.

“These are my friends! Yeonjun, Soobin, and Taehyun!” The 3 boys waved at you and you grinned sweetly. Huening pulled you to sit beside him and patted your head.

“I heard you’re from SMA and there are a lot of athletic students there. Could you be one of them?” Taehyun asked you, curiosity shown in his eyes, and obviously, it was shown in the others as well.

“Oh, maybe, you’re a tennis player! Oh, oh- a badminton player? An archer!? You might play baseball, maybe basketball-,”

“Hyuka, you’re getting too excited again! Let her speak,” Soobin said and gently patted your shoulder.

“I’m actually... I play volleyball-,”

“WHAT!? REALLY!? WE PLAY VOLLEYABLL TOO!” Yeonjun exclaimed and immediately, Taehyun covered his mouth.

“I apologize, he’s overreactive. Anyway, that’s really cool! I heard the Academy has amazing volleyball players, especially the ones who are in the Varsity team.” Taehyun said, and you laughed.

“Were you in the female’s Varsity team, though? If you are, that’s so sick then! SMA held the girls’ volleyball championship title for 3 years straight!” Hyuka said, slightly patting your shoulders.

“Well, I kinda am- I used to be their second coach, but I stopped because of an injury that happened to me before.” You frowned,

“Is it fatal?” Soobin softly asked, concerned, and a bit disappointed. Your soft smile returned and shook your head. They all sighed in relief, which somewhat confused you.

“Why did you stop playing then?” Taehyun asked, you looked at your hands. “ I just stopped playing, I guess,”

“Don’t you want to play again?”

And that's how you're now standing on the sidelines of the volleyball court. The 4 boys in their orange and black uniforms.

"Who's who?" You asked as you sat down on the benches. They all look at each other before looking at you, "and there's only 4 of you?"

"Not so many males want to play volleyball, so it became a problem, really." Soobin scratched his head while looking at Yeonjun.

"Wait- are you guys... Did you just form your team this year?" You asked them and they all nodded. Your mouth agape because of the shock.

"Okay then... Let me watch you guys play?" You asked, and they all nodded once more. They went to their positions, and you immediately noticed something.

Yeonjun was standing on the right-side hitter's position, Soobin was standing in the middle of the front zone, they were standing on the right side. On the left, Taehyun was standing in the back zone's middle area, and Hyuka in front of Yeonjun from the other side.

"They already have positions..." You muttered unconsciously and watched them play.

You watched them attentively; the way they spike because they don't have other players, the way they pass the ball, it was amazing.

You're just slightly disappointed they don't have other members to increase their okay. You notice something moving from the side of your eyes. You turned your head and saw the boy from that morning.

It's him again, you thought. He moves to sit on the benches a far, a spot where the boys won't notice he's there. Your eyes were glued on him and you never miss the look of loneliness on his face.

"y/n! Come play with us!" Soobin grabbed your hand, snatching your attention from the lonely boy. You nod and take your jacket off. Soon, you enter the court.

It's been weeks since you transferred to BHA.

Everyone was friendly to you. You met other great people and Lee Heeseung, the new player in Team Together, aka BHA's Volleyball Varsity Team.

The boy is there again, his eyes follow the playing figures of the 5 boys. You stood up from your seat and walked towards him.

"Hello," you spoke to him, he flinched. He just looked at you and it made you chuckle. You sit beside him, your hand on your skirt, and the other beside his.

"You've been watching the boys for a while now. Do you have a problem with them?" You asked and his eyes widened. He immediately shook his head and frowned. His eyes moved to stare at the rubbery ground.

"I... They all look so happy and friendly- I'm jealous, I want to be friends," he whispered. You felt your heart melt at the sight. You were about to place a hand on his arm until you heard Taehyun and Yeonjun shout.

"Where are we going to find a setter!? We're not complete and you already want us to join the upcoming Academies Volleyball Championship!?" Taehyun shouted at Yeonjun, who looked annoyed.

"Don't you want this, Taehyun!? That's the reason we made this team!" Yeonjun shouted back, Heeseung stood between them.

"Hey, hey, stop it!" Heeseung gently grabbed Taehyun's shoulder and pushed him away from Yeonjun.

"Yeonjun, Taehyung has a point! We can't immediately join the Championships when we don't even have a setter. We don't have enough time either," Soobin spoke.

You look at the boy beside you and examine his sitting figure. He grabs his arm and made him stand up. His eyes grew wide at your unexpected actions.

"Good figure- Yeonjun, how about this kid?" You shout and pointed at him. His eyes grew wider as he got the urge to run away and never show himself ever again.

The boys walk towards him and examine him. Huening moved to stand behind him, same as Heeseung.

"Hey, kid- do you know how to play?" Yeonjun asked, but he shook his head. The boys look at him, shocked, before glancing at you who looked unfazed.

"You don't even know how to play! Y/n, why him!? We don't have enough time if Choi Yeonjun here wants to join the Championships." Taehyun glares at Yeonjun, who glared back.

"Volleyball is a sport open for everyone. The championship is 3 months away. This boy... What's your name?" You look at him,

"You don't even know how name!" Taehyun shouted, which made Huening rush to his side and nuzzle him away from everyone.

"Choi Beomgyu..."

"Okay, Beomgyu! From this day on, you are now part of Team Together!" You said after you felt something tingle in you when you first saw the boy.

"What!? So sudden-,"

"If you agree to join the championship, I will permanently be your coach. I will train you and tell you everything you have to know... Especially SMA's varsity team, Team Dream. What do you say?" You kept the smile on your face, even if the others have hesitant ones.

They sigh and Yeonjun reached his hand out. You gladly shook it and looked at Beomgyu, who looked distraught. You pat his shoulder,

"Leave Choi Beomgyu to me,"

"No, Beomgyu!" You walk to his side with the ball in your palms.

"You turn your hand when the ball reaches your left ear, don't immediately touch the ball!" You said as you pass the ball to Taehyun.

"Also, jump higher! If you jump that high, the ball won't even go to the other side!" You said before going back to the sidelines. Beomgyu sighs and wipes the sweat off his face.

"Beomgyu, I want you to do it while staying aware of your surroundings!" You clap your hands and motions Taehyun to do a serve.

The ball makes its way towards the other side of the court. Huening passed it to Beomgyu, who jumped high but unable to make the ball go to the other side.

He falls to the ground, his buttock his the floor first, and he groans in pain. The members sigh, feeling hopeless at their new member.

Yeonjun helps Beomgyu stand up, but the disappointed look on his face didn't go unnoticed by Beomgyu. Yeonjun then faces you who looked defeated, but you aren't hopeless at all.

"That's all for practice today- everyone can go home now. Don't forget to change and eat well. Beomgyu, you're going with me," you say and exit the gym.

Beomgyu stood there, his eyes glued to the floor. He felt like crying; he was close to letting others step on his heart. The other boys left the gymnasium, but Beomgyu stayed.

He knew he will never fit in with them. They're such out-going and athletic people, but him? He wasn't out-going nor athletic at all. He's just the boy with no friends at all.

He didn't know what he was thinking when he accepted this.

"Beomgyu, get changed. We're going somewhere," you came back and helped him stand up.

You softly patted his shoulder before sitting on the benches. He stared at you,

"What? I'll wait for you here, so get changed," you smile and Beomgyu nodded. He went to the changing room to clean himself.

Your eyes followed the boy.

His aura screamed introvert and loneliness. You wanted to change that, make him surrounded by people he wants to be friends with. However, it looked like the team didn't want Beomgyu.

You don't know, but there's something about the boy. It makes you feel confident and protective, yet pitiful.

Minutes later, Beomgyu came back. You stood up from your seat. "Let's go watch some boys practice."

Beomgyu wowed when he saw Donghyuck do a dump to the other team.

"So this is Team Dream..." He muttered, and you nodded.

"They're joining the championship again this year, and if we win until the finals, we might go against them." You said, and Beomgyu stepped back. You turned around to look at him.

The panicked and afraid expression on his face was the expression you were expecting. You held his hand and moved him closer.

"Beomgyu, the reason I'm a little harsh on you is because a setter is expected to lead the team. I know that it's too much pressure, but that's why, I'm here to help you. Don't be afraid, I'm here, Beomgyu," You assured him but he shook his head.

"N-no! I'm not good for the job, y/n! I'm not a good setter and I'm never one. I can't even lead the boys, heck, they don't even talk to me! I'm just an introverted boy who wanted to be friends with people who are out of my reach."

"Beomgyu, listen here- you are an amazing setter. You may not have realized it, but it's your low confidence that's crushing you." You say, but he walks away.

You bite your lips as you watch Beomgyu walk away, however; you heard the chant of your brother's team.

Suddenly, you're reminded by the reason you stopped playing volleyball.

"I was like you too, Beomgyu!" You shouted,

"I was scared that people wouldn't trust me because I'm such a lonely person! I wanted to become friends who are out of my reach, but I couldn't. I know how you feel, I know how hard it is to become a setter because I was one too!" He looked at you with a slightly surprised expression.

"But I think it's better than getting the trust of your teammates first than getting your trust broken by them." You look tearful and Beomgyu stood frozen in his place.

"I stopped volleyball because my teammate injured me... I’m fearful experiencing that, so I stopped, but I will never forget the fun I found in volleyball." You walked towards him and clasped his hand.

"I know how you feel, Gyu. I also know you're an intelligent boy. The boys told me they're only waiting for you to blossom and once you're ready-,"

"We will win the championship," Beomgyu turned around at the voices he heard. He bit his lips to endure the tears falling. Huening ran up to Beomgyu and tightly hugged him.

"We believe in you, Beomgyu. I'm sorry we treated you like that," Huening said and broke the hug.

"Sorry, dude-," Yeonjun smacked his shoulder. Soobin ruffled Beomgyu's hair and apologized as well, Heeseung did the same. Taehyun stood in front of Beomgyu, his arms crossed but a smile on his face.

"We have 3 months before the championship, can you practice with us? As a team this time?" Taehyun asked and Beomgyu looked at you.

The wide and sweetest smile danced on your lips. You tugged on his jacket. "What's your answer, Gyu?"

"Yes, I will practice with you!" He shouted, and the boys cheered.

"ONE DREAM! Tomorrow X Together, fighting!" Yeonjun laughed before they all walked away. Food being discussed among them for the night. You were about to follow them until you heard your name called by someone.

"y/n! I didn't know you're here!" You turn around to see Dream running towards you. A laugh escaped your lips, and you saw the 5 boys turn around to look at you.

"How's BHA? Is everything okay there? Are they treating you, right?" Jaemin asked, and you laughed. You nodded your head,

"Hey, y/n~ Haechannie wants to take you out again!" Mark wrapped an arm around Haechan's shoulder. The younger pushed Mark away and apologized to you.

"A setter with a setter! A perfect combination!" Renjun spoke, and the boys laughed. You glance at the 5 boys before taking a step back from Dream.

"I'm busy right now- after all, I have a future champion to train!" You intentionally shouted for Team Together to hear.

"Goodbye, see ya!" You said before running towards the 5 boys. Wide and relieved that you're staying with them.

That night changed everything.

Here you are, standing by the audience, hand in hand as you watched Team Together vs Team Dream. Butterflies flying in your stomach when Jaemin did a spike on Team Together.

The past 3 months were honestly the best for you. Team Together won so many matches against other teams despite being a rookie team.

You realized the feelings you first felt when you first met Beomgyu. The times you spent training together, the times you laughed, the times you played, the times when you both almost got hurt... It was all coming to you.

You like Beomgyu- you love him, however, with the championship being close, you didn't want to distract him.

Now that both teams are tied, it scared you. You didn't want them to lose, but you also want them to win. Team Dream was being cheered on by your old school, the same goes for Team Together.

"You think, they'll win this?" Jungwon moves to your side. You didn't spare a glance at the boy and kept your eyes on the match. Your hand gripped on the railing: just one more point and it's victory.

However, Team Together already looks troubled. You don't know how much more they could handle with the pressure of being one point away.

Beomgyu looked like he was about to faint. He was shaking; it was so visible even from a far. Heeseung placed a hand on Beomgyu's back to keep him from falling before they went back to their positions.

Beomgyu shut his eyes before taking a deep breath. Mark was the one who did the serve this time, his jump server caught Team Together off, but they caught the ball perfectly.

Beomgyu looked extremely tired. He was exhausted by Team Dream's plays.

Suddenly, you act without thinking.

Jungwon friend placed a hand on your shoulder while you attentively watch the volleyball match everyone has been waiting for. You slightly lift yourself from the railings.

"What- yah! Y/N! You'll fall!" Jungwon held onto you closely.

You shouted without thinking.

"CHOI BEOMGYU! I LOVE YOU, SO YOU BETTER WIN THIS!"

Everyone was shocked, and it took them back, but Beomgyu took it as an advantage to do a spike on Team Dream. Then the time ran out.

They won. Team Together won. Everyone jumped from their seats, chanting the name of Beomgyu and Team Together.

"TOMORROW X TOGETHER!" Your school chanted, you run down from the benches, and towards the team. Immediately, you jumped into their arms.

"You did it! You won the championship! YOU'RE A CHAMPION!" You jumped and hugged everyone.

"IT'S ALL BECAUSE OF YOU!" Taehyun spun you around, which made you laugh. Students gather around the 6 of you, their chants of their names made you smile like a mad person.

You looked at Beomgyu, who was crawled into a ball. You smiled and walked towards him. You tapped on his shoulder, which made him look at you. He smiled widely and hugged you immediately.

"I love you too, my princess." He whispered before he kissed your forehead. Heeseung took your hand and placed you on his shoulder.

"OUR COACH!" Yeonjun and Hyuka shouted, which resulted to you hiding your face. You turn around to see Team Dream's puzzled faces.

"Heeseung, please put me down," you said, and he did. You run towards Dream with TXT behind you.

"So you're their legendary secret coach," Haechan said, his head tilted as he examined the 6 boys behind you.

"Yes, and that was an amazing play. You tired my boyfriend," you pulled Beomgyu close to you. His eyes widened and his cheeks were red.

"Well, congratulations- also, take care of my sister," Jeno patted his shoulder. Their eyes widen,

"SISTER!?"

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carnationcreation · 4 years

Note

can you please do a julie x fem!reader where reader is a basketball player and loses their letterman jacket and Julie has a bad day or something and messes up her clothes so she gets the jacket from lost and found and that leads to people shipping them and whatever? thanks!!

TITLE: The Letterman (Julie Molina x reader)

✌🏻Masterlist Taglist, Requests, and Works in progress!

Request: can you please do a julie x fem!reader where reader is a basketball player and loses their letterman jacket and Julie has a bad day or something and messes up her clothes so she gets the jacket from lost and found and that leads to people shipping them and whatever? thanks!!

Prompt/summary: Julie accidentally wears the star basketball players jacket at school.

Word Count: 1,116

Authors note: I love this idea so much omg

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The first bell of the day rang causing the basketball players to sprint inside.

"See you at practice!"

(Y/n) turned and waved at her friend before rushing into the music room.

"Ah Ms. (Y/l/n), I see that you decided to join us this morning."

"Sorry! Coach kept us after practice last night and I couldn't find my jacket this morning."

The teacher sighed, "Don't let it happen again."

"It won't, I promise."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Julie had had a terrible morning.

First her alarm didn't go off causing her to be late, she forgot her sweatshirt at home so by the time her second class rolled around she was practically a Popsicle, and someone ran into her in the cafeteria staining her dress with food. The school always blasted the AC in the summer so she always tried to bring a long-sleeve shirt of some sort to keep her warm during class, her last resort was to head to the lost and found to see if anything there she could use to cover up the giant stain on her dress. The lost and found closet held a few jackets and hoodies, as well as hats, shoes, and even someones underwear.

Gross. Julie grabbed the closest jacket to the door and rushed out, not looking to see what it was since she was going to return it by the end of the day anyways. As she threw on the very warm jacket she saw she was getting odd looks from the students around her.

"Why is everyone staring?" she said as she walked up to Flynn.

"Do.. you know who's jacket you're wearing?"

Julie flipped the jacket off and turned it around to look at the lettering on the back.

(Y/l/n).

"This... this is that basketball players jacket isn't it?"

"Yup," Flynn giggled, "And now words going around you two are a thing."

Julie felt her face grow hot as she fiddled with the Letterman in her hands.

"Just put it back on, you can give it back to her after school. The team always hangs out in the gym."

"I can't do that!" Julie screeched, "It'd be so embarrassing!"

Flynn rolled her eyes, "You can talk to the cute girl without it being weird, now put that back on so people don't see the chocolate milk stain."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The rest of the day seemed to drag on slowly. (Y/n) was freezing without her warm Letterman jacket in her bag, and Julie had to endure the whispers and gossip that came with wearing the basketball players jacket.

By the end of the day they were both ready to go home.

(Y/n) waited patiently in the gym with her teammates for the rest of the students to clear out so they could use the locker rooms. Shooting and joking around. (Y/n) heard the girls go quiet and whispers start from the bleachers causing her to turn to see the infamous Julie Molina walking into the gym. It wasn't until she finally saw the jacket slung across her shoulder that she realized what she was doing in there.

"Um... (Y/n)?" Julie said quietly.

(Y/n) propped the basketball on her hip and walked up to the two girls, "Hey, was wondering where that went."

"I found it in the lost in found," Julie said, she opened up the jacket to reveal the stain on the front part of her dress, "And I used it to cover this up. Sorry I took it, I didn't realize it was yours until later."

Julie went to take the jacket off before (Y/n) stopped her, "No, no, it's okay. Actually, if you show up to my game tonight and cheer me on I'll let you wear it the rest of the week. It looks better on you anyways."

Julie couldn't help but blush at her cocky smirk, "O-okay."

"Great," the girl smiled, "I'll see you tonight!"

Flynn had to drag Julie out of the gym in her frozen state.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The game that night was crowded with people from both teams, Flynn and Julie quickly found seats near the bench they knew (Y/n) was going to be sitting on.

As the team ran into the stadium the entire crowd stood up to cheer.

Julie didn't know too much about basketball but every time the school's team scored Julie tried her best to cheer with the rest of the crowd. (Y/n) sent cocky smiles her way every chance she could, and she loved how Julie blushed every time. The game was close, with only a 30 seconds left the team needed a miracle to pull ahead from a tie.

The point guard quickly passed the ball to (Y/n) who launched it from half court, right as the buzzer went off the ball hit the backboard and sunk into the net.

The crowd went nuts.

Team mates surrounded (Y/n) jumping around in celebration, as soon as (Y/n) could break free she sprinted over right to where Julie and Flynn were standing. Pulling Julie into a hug and kissing the top of her head. The team quickly pulled her away to shake hands with the opposing team.

After the game most people stayed behind to take pictures with their friends or family members. (Y/n) quickly spotted Julie and Flynn trying their best to sneak outside.

"Hey," (Y/n) said, gently grabbing Julie's hand, "The teams going out to eat after this. Do you wanna go with me?"

"Oh, like, on a date?"

(Y/n) giggled, "If you wanna call it that then yeah. Let's go on a date."

Julie smiled and nodded.

"Great, lemme go get changed and I'll meet you outside."

(Y/n) ran off to the locker room. Flynn grabbed Julie's shoulders and cheered, "You got a date!"

Julie laughed at her friend, a couple of players passing them stopped in front of the girls, "About time (Y/l/n) said something." Julie blushed as (Y/n) emerged from the locker room in joggers and a crop top. When she got closer she grabbed Julie's hand and pulled her into a side hug, "Ready to go?"

"Yup, Flynn do you want my dad to take you home?"

"I got a ride, you two have fun," Flynn smiled and started to walk away, she quickly turned around, "But not too much fun!" Julie and (Y/n) laughed as she finally walked out the gym doors.

"I'm actually kinda glad you found my jacket. But, you would look better in one of my hoodies," (Y/n) smirked. Julie blushed and hid her face in (Y/n)'s shoulder.

"I think I'm gonna stick to the letterman."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*If you signed up for my taglist but don’t see your name please message me!

Taglist: @thebookwormlife @talksoprettyjjx @coolreallyfuzzystudentuniverse @igotabadfeelingabouteverything @larrystylinson-sus @lovesanimals @aunicornmademedoit @thexhotmess @ssprayberrythings @registerednursejackie @nicolewithasoul @homealone200 @hemmingsness @persephonequeenofthedead @bookfrog242 @peachyxdream @catieiscute2001 @julieandthephantomsblogduh @fangirling-allday @ashleyleblancx @alltimekp @wcnderwoo @unipanda1006 @disgustedchild @aberette13 @dpaccione @whyworry27 @number-0-iz @musicconversedance @owlgirl1209 @angelxfics @hamdehlesmis @marinettepotterandplagg @idkanymoremansstuff @spooky-season-bitch @starkeysgirl @chenellearose @voguesir @thegirlwholikestomanythings @mandiscadelinha @crybabyddl @jasm1nesdragons @daisiesforlacey @khiaraaa-in-spacee @harrys-bitch @bookdealer5 @blue21727 @echocharm17618

#julie and the phantoms #julie and the phantoms imagine #julie molina #julie molina imagine #julie molina x reader #julie and the phantoms x reader

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pillow-anime-talk · 4 years

Text

i love you (again).

synopsis: You were in love with Akashi for three years, but you never confessed your feelings to him. Seijuurou also liked you and also didn’t told it aloud. The match between Teikou and Meikou made your feelings a bit change... But now you are here – at the Winter Cup Finals – and you see the red-haired boy once again. This time, however, not as a Junior High School student, but as a Seirin High manager.

# tags: headcanon; teikou/seirin!au; crush culture & friendship; manager-nurse!y/n; mild angst/drama; but also fluff; a slightly changed plot; sfw

includes: female reader ft. seijuurou akashi, rest of genration of miracles & seirin basketball team {knb}

part zero {click} & part two {click} & part three {click}

author’s note: 😭😭 i accidentally deleted your message, anon, i’m so sorry!! however, i remember what your request was about, so of course i wrote it!

→ in Teikou Junior High ←

↘ You admired everyone on the basketball team. You were really delighted with this sport, especially since you could watch the game so close as a team manager for Teikou and as a friend of the Generation of Miracles, Kuroko and Momoi.

↘ Your role in the team was to take care of the players’ well-being; you were great at planning training and analyzing other teams, but the team always lacked with health care before and after games. Therefore, you left the analysis to the pink-haired teenager, and took care of the bodies and minds of your all friends. You helped Midorima and bandaged his fingers, you gave Aomine and Kise water or towels, you stopped all Tetsuya’s bleedings, and also you brought some snacks for Murasakibara who let you at that time to wrap his knees with some plasters.

↘ You cared for the boys as best you could and the captain was grateful all the time, even though he wasn’t showing it as he should.

↘ By the way, few people knew that you had feelings for Seijuurou. One person was actually knew about i, and it was Kuroko, because you were always the closest to him – and you have come even closer to each other after the changes between the whole team and when each of the members of the core squad improved their basketball skills. You and Tetsu had really similar thoughts on team play. You also liked vanilla shake, so your friendship was even stronger.

↘ When the last Winter Cup competition came, you were really surprised by what was happening on the court. Momoi thought the same, gently squeezing your hand to cheer you both up.

↘ Then it was time for the match between your school and Kamata West Junior High and everything looked like it always was. However, in the middle of the match, Kuroko was injured and had to leave the gym. You did the same thing because you were very worried about your best friend, especially as a Teikou team nurse-manager.

↘ So you spent time with the unconscious Tetsuya until the end of the semi-finals, talking to Satsuki and Seijuurou for a while and then stopping the blue-haired boy from playing on the court. You knew, you knew perfectly well that the young boy wanted to play with his friend from Meikou Junior High, but his condition didn’t allow it.

↘ That’s why you wished Momoi and the captain good luck, and stayed with Tetsuya, comforting him. But you had a bad feeling about this game in the back of your head, so you told the blue-eyed player about it.

↘ “This is our last competition, right? I hope it will be pleasant and worth remembering.” You smiled warmly at which the teenager nodded. “I wish we could play like in first and second grade. When everyone was enjoying the game, not the win.” You added a little quieter, and Kuroko sighed lowly.

↘ “It’s going to be okay, Y/N-chan... Remember that after the finals you were supposed to talk to Akashi-kun.” He replied with a soft laugh that made your cheeks redden.

↘ “Y-Yeah. But I don’t know if I’m ready for this...”

↘ The conversation was nice and calm, Kuroko rested, you too. You weren’t thinking about the game, although you still felt a strange feeling of stress and insecurity.

↘ At the end of the final quarter of the final, Satsuki visited you and Kuroko who wanted to see what was happening on the court. Of course, you and your pink female friend helped the boy get to the TV.

↘ At the same second, you and Kuroko noticed that something was wrong, so you grabbed his warm hand and ran towards the huge gym, gasping for breath.

↘ You both entered the big room at the moment when Kuroko’s friend was aiming for the basket hoop and Murasakibara threw the ball into it, scoring two points for the opposing team.

↘ Seeing the score on the digital scoreboard and hearing the conversation between basket squad, your heart pounded painfully and your eyes turned to the Teikou captain.

↘ A few tears ran down of your red cheeks when you remembered their first Nationals competition and the energy they had at that time. Now, they were completely unlike those happy players.

↘ “Sei-kun... Why?” You whispered, taking a step back.

↘ That day was the last time when you saw the Teikou basketball team on the court. You didn’t show up at any next trip, match or training, and your manager role was over.

↘ Additionally, for the next few weeks you didn’t think about your feelings towards the captain. They have been forgotten.

→ in Seirin High ←

↘ You and Kuroko chosen the same High School – Seirin High, obviously. Thanks to the new school team, you two could enjoy basketball again as you used to. You made friends with the whole squad, with Riko and even with the cute little dog that Tetsu found.

↘ You were supporting the team again as a manager. Or rather as a nurse-manager. The boys (especially Teppei) were really grateful to you and they were glad to have someone like you in their squad.

↘ You were with them all the time, you supported their game and dreams of winning the Winter Cup.

↘ And... they finally reached the finals.

↘ You were more than happy when they defeated the Kaijou High and Kise.

↘ But shortly after that, your eyes met the two-colored orbs that you admired and loved so much some time ago.

↘ You didn’t have the courage to approach Seijuurou before the match, so you sat on the wooden bench during the game, first watched your team, then the Rakuzan basketball squad and Akashi.

↘ Not gonna lie, but it was the worst hour of your life because too much was happening.

↘ You had your hands full.

↘ But when the game was over, Seirin High won and Akashi smiled and shook Kuroko’s hand... You couldn’t stop yourself. You got up and came over to him with many salty tears in your eyes. Tetsuya understood it very right and he didn’t blame you for not congratulating your team first. He knew perfectly well that you had been waiting for this moment for over three years. So he smiled in your direction, walked away from you two and started talking with the team, with Kagami, with Kiyoshi, with captain, with Riko.

↘ In meantime you stood in front of Akashi’s figure and tried to wipe away the tears that were unpleasantly biting your both cheeks.

↘ “...I missed you.” You whispered shyly, lifting your head to look at him. “Happy you.” You added with a smile, to which the red-haired player laughed and held out his hand in your direction.

↘ “I missed you too.” He answered honestly as you put your fingers on his pale skin. “Also happy you.” He pulled your body against him and hugged you uncertainly as you let him to do it. “I’m sorry for everything.”

↘ You moved a few centimeters away from him and then took a deep breath.

↘ “Listen, Y/N.” / “Listen, Sei-kun.” You laughed together while telling the other person to start. Eventually, however, Seijuurou started talking.

↘ “I know that a lot of time has passed and a lot has changed. I have no idea if you have someone special to your heart, but... I like you. I have liked you since you became our manager at Teikou. I hope you accept these feelings, but if you don’t... I understand. I was a terrible person and...”

↘ You hugged him again, ignoring his sweaty skin and clothes. “I admit, I tried to forget about you, but I like you too. I liked you from the first year of Junior High School and I always wanted to tell you about it. I’m so glad you came back. I hope someday... I hope we can play with other boys again like before.” You said in a warm tone, looking at Akashi, then at Seirin team, then at the Generation of Miracles boys who sat in the stands.

↘ Then you looked at Rakuzan capitan once again.

↘ “Okay. I don’t mind. But we’ll go on a date first.”

↘ “O-Oh, yeah. Right. D-Date.” You laughed nervously, feeling your heart beat faster.

↘ “EYYY, AKASHICCHI KISS HER, YOU DUMMY!”

↘ Your cheeks turned a hundred times redder not only because of the sound of Ryouta’s loud voice, but also because Seijuurou... actually did it.

↘ Now, you had the impression that your feelings not only came back, but also grew up.

#— 🍓#knb #knb headcanons #knb x reader #knb x you #knb x y/n #kuroko no basket #kuroko no basket headcanons #kuroko no basquet #kuroko no basquet headcanons #kuroko no basquet x reader #akashi seijuurou #akashi seijuurou headcanons #akashi seijuurou x reader #akashi seijuurou x you #generation of miracles #generation of miracles x reader #seirin high #seirin high x reader

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onelamewriter · 4 years

Text

Suga, Daichi, Tanaka, and Noya with a S/O who’s Great at Volleyball

Request: Can you do suga and daichi + tanaka and nishinoya with a seemingly lazy s/o that somehow turns out to be a very experienced volleyball player? Thanks!

A/N: This ask spoke to me on so many levels sjkjsksjsk. Hope that my brief days of volleyball but constant lazy mood serve for something (was that a pun???). I tried to make the reader gender neutral, failing if you squint. Enjoy and send requests!

Sawamura Daichi

Daichi was already very well aware of your reluctance to do, well, any physical activity. And while he tried to get you to do some exercise and accompany him on his morning runs, he didn’t pry much more.

So one day the team is in desperate need for practice due to a practice match with Nekoma approaching, but their gym is under maintenance and therefore unable to use.

And since the basketball team + girls volleyball gym is also under their use constantly, they can’t borrow theirs either.

Coah Ukai tells them to call it off and not to worry, that that’d do no good and it’d be better to not stress themselves out too much. Advised them to practice a bit on their own until the gym is fixed.

But Daddychi is stressedichi because they still have some things to tune, try new tosses and spikes and uughhh they can’t do that without a proper place.

Daichi comes home to you after the terrible announcement is made, looking very disheartened and glum as he repeated the news to you.

So you, being an amazing partner, offer him and his team a place to practice — a gymnasium no one uses anymore very close to where you live.

Daichi is just so happy that he doesn’t even questions how you know it, just to tell him a day and time to take the team there.

So the day arrives, you wait for Daichi and his team at the gates and right after school the volleyball team is following the ever leisure you like a group of ducklings.

After an uphill trek to the place, the boys found themselves in front of a large gymnasium with just a little bit of rust at the walls and some foliage, but otherwise in a good state.

You open the doors with the key (which should’ve been a clue) and once inside you turn on the lights, revealing a surprisingly clean training area, with nets, scoreboards and such. The team gaped, since the inside certainly didn’t looked like the outside at all, but you shrug them off and usher them to get started with practice, and so they do.

You just lean against the wall near the doors, arms crossed over your chest with a watchful eye on each of them as they do their thing, often dropping some tips and corrections here and there, and that’s when Daichi is like ??? cuz everything you’re saying is,, accurate and makes sense and the boys are getting better???

So as they’re taking a break Daichi comes up to you and asks you how do you know so much about volleyball, sure he’s talk to you about, maybe even tried teaching you a little, but none of the advise you gave were remotely similar to the simplistic stuff he’s told you.

And when you very nonchalantly tell him you used to be in a top team??

“Come again?” Daichi dumbly uttered, an absent smile on his face as though he didn’t quite understood.

“I used to be part of a team,” You repeat, an amuse smirk making its way to your face as your boyfriend’s eyes widen considerably. “We used to be real good too, almost a Shiratorizawa level in the rankings of Miyagi and all.”

“You— I— you were in a—” Daichi sputtered, eliciting a laugh out of you as he took a deep breath to recollect his thoughts, waiting until your laughing fit was done to squeak out a, “How?”

“Eeesh, you think so lowly of me? I’m kinda hurt, love.” You feign a hurt expression and press a hand to your chest to emphasize to fake whole in your heart. Chuckling as he tried to backpedal on his wording and scramble to spew apologies to you before you cut him off with a lazy wave. “‘S fine, can’t blame ya,”

Daichi breathes out a sigh of relief before actually asking something. “You... keep saying used to, why aren’t you playing anymore?”

“We got to nationals and that was it for me, I guess.” You answered, glancing at your shoes and missing his eyes widening once again. “That was kinda my one goal, and after that was done I guess I was too. Heh, the team’s still wanting me to rejoin them, but it’s too much of a hassle.”

“You don’t like it anymore?” his question came a bit too sharp, and it certainly hit a cord in you from the way you flinched slightly.

“That’s...” Seeing as you sighed wearily, Daichi took it upon himself to voice his thoughts, leaning on the wall right beside you where your arms were grazing each other. “I think you still do.”

“Huh?” You breathed out, eyebrows lifted

“You seem to know a lot, possibly more than I do, and you’ve gone to nationals, that’s one heck of an achievement!” He complemented, leaning forward so he was making eye contact with you and nodded to the court. “You can help us a lot, and I’m sure our advisor and coach would appreciate it. Plus, from the way you kept looking at our plays... I think you still want to play volleyball— and I get that!”

“But... If you decide to go back in court with your team, just know that I’ll be supporting you all the way!” He gave you a warm smile, one of those he reserves for you and you only, and you couldn’t help smile back, although understandably mellow, and nodded with a quiet okay. “I think we have to get back into practice, before Kageyama bonks Hinata on the head again,” he sweatdropped, snapping his head to you with a half-heartedly stern expression. “You have to tell me more about your sport days though. Everything in detail!”

You couldn’t help the joyous laugh that escaped your throat at his order, and waved him off. “Sure sure, now go save your decoy, Captain,” And as he went to separate the oddball duo, you smiled softly to yourself in thought. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad...

Sugawara Koushi

Sugawara’s another one who tried to get you to do some physical activities, but much more playfully than Daichi’s attempts. But after he noticed you wouldn’t budge from your position in bed or the couch (depending on he day) he very quickly gave up and decided to tease you about it and cuddle with you, because he is a man of culture.

The two of you got to Karasuno, so you were often waiting for him after classes either outside or inside the gym (depending on whether you felt like napping or not). He also told you many times to go home and eat something and not wait for him until three-thirty.

On this particular occasion you found yourself inside watching the boys (mostly your boy) practice, secretly taking mental notes about their plays and forms. You internally cringe at the horrible receives their current ginger boy has, and the salty french fry too. Huh, should I have fries today...? Oh, that sounds good... Ketchup and all...

You were so lost in your own world controlled by your empty stomach that you didn’t noticed Hinata missing a receive and the now stray volleyball coming straight at you.

Almost.

Because when you hear Sugawara’s call for your name and look up from the ground, eyes locking into the incoming ball it’s like if a switch just flipped.

You immediately stick your arms out, body lowered into a semi-crouch yet face blank as ever, the satisfying bang of the ball hitting your forearms resonated throughout the gym, and the familiar sting on your forearms becoming dull fairly quickly. You watch the ball bounce off your arms and into the woodplanks.

Suga (and everyone else) is just,,, w hat??? because you, the one person in PE who uses the excuse of “I stubbed my toe,” to not stretch, just did a perfect receive and like??? now you’re just picking up bag and leaning against the wall again like it didn’t just happened???

“WOAHHH!!! (L/n)-san!! How’d you do that?!” Hinata asks as he hops around you, stars in his eyes and pumping his fists. “The ball was like ‘whoosh’ super fast! But then it went like ‘bam!’ when you received it! And then it went ‘pom!’ when it touched the ground and then—”

“Hinata get off their face, dumbass!” Kageyama scolded the tangerine, holding him by the back of his collar. “Plus it went ‘pom’ first and then ‘bam’, boke!”

“Shouldn’t you be apologizing for almost hitting them, Shrimpy?” Tsukishima snickered, picking the ball you just received. However you cut off the ginger’s attempt apologies with a lazy wave and a yawn.

“Don’t worry. I’m used to receiving harsher stray balls than that,” You nonchalantly said, causing the him to comment a “So cool!!” while the older teens just stared at you bug-eyed.

“Wh-wha— (Y/n) how do you know how to make a receive like that??” Sugawara squeaked, he nearly had a heart attack at the thought of a volleyball hitting your unsuspecting form, but now he’s ????

“Oh, I sometimes go to a volleyball camp my uncle owns on summer break. Been going there since I was little.” You scratch you arm, the stink spiking up a tiny bit. “Is practice done now?”

Now Suga’s even more bug-eyed but soon practice is finished and you and your boyfriend are walking home alongside the team (since Daichi said he’d invite you guys some pork buns and— well, who are you refuse free food?). But the earlier events are still on their head, so they question you about it.

“Oi, oi! You should teach these two how to receive, see if they get better at it!” Tanaka exclaimed while poking the blond and ginger first years on the cheeks, the former swatting his hand away while the latter wholeheartedly agreeing.

“I don’t have the energy for it though... I’d get sleepy real fast.” You said, looking between you and Suga to your intertwined hands, swinging them absently as you went.

“(Y/n),” Suga got your attention while the others continued their shenanigans, fake teary eyes and a cute pout on his face. “Why’d you never told me you played volleyball? Of all the times I’ve asked you to do something with me??”

“I don’t play, I just know how to.” You shrugged, looking down and squeezing his cold hand. “Plus, cuddling seems more fun than playing that all day...” you muttered that last part with a light pink blush on your cheeks, and so he couldn’t stay ‘mad’ any longer, cooing internally at your bashful confession.

Suga then pecked you cheeks, “I guess we can do that once we get home then,” He watched in amusement as they only grew darker in shade at his affection, eliciting an awed sound from him as he pinched your cheeks.

“K-Koushiii...”

Tanaka Ryuunosuke

He finds out through a practice match! Your school against Karasuno!

So, Tanaka here, my boy, was really pumped for this match because both Ukai and Takeda have been hyping them about this top school they’d be facing, but through his elation the name of the school might’ve slipped past him, so he was unaware that it was your school.

You just leaned on your hand as he vividly explained you how he was gonna beat the other team, and since he was already used to you mellow and quiet reactions he didn’t think much of it and kept rambling on — sort of why the two of you were such a great balance to each other, your lethargic nature being dragged around by Tanaka’s energetic activities, his own boisterous persona taking it down a notch by your gentle coaxing (read: kisses).

You see, you already knew your school was facing off against his —after all, you were the one to request it in the first place — but you didn’t want to ruin the surprise yet and kept quiet, inwardly laughing to yourself when Tanaka imitated a spike and kept with his demonstration.

The day of the practice match comes around and soon the rival school knocks to their door, bowing to thank them for having them and to have a good game. When they straightened their posture though, Tanaka stares at one of the players that looks oddly familiar.

Blinks one, twice, thrice... and then literally reels back in pure shock, mouth hanging open.

(Y-Y/N)?!?” He gasps loudly and dramatically as you give him a lopsided grin and a peace sign.

“Osu,”

“Buh — BUT HOW?!” He sputtered, earning a disapproving look from Daichi.

“You really didn’t know we were facing their school?”

“W-well, no! But — ugh,” Tanaka snapped his head to your still grinning form, you caught on quickly to his frustrated yet still shocked expression and put your hands up in mock surrender.

“I didn’t want to spoil the surprise,” You stuck your tongue out. “As captain,I can’t gave all my cards shown.”

“CAPTAIN?!”

“This is so good,” Suga stifled a laugh, choosing to shake his head and place his hands on his hips. “I am a bit surprised though, didn’t thought (L/n) here would be a pro player— ah, no offence!”

“I really don’t think you can offend this bozo with anything, really.” One your vice captain said, nudging you with their shoulder as you stupidly nodded your head in affirmation.

“I wouldn’t have guessed it myself, but I guess the element of surprise is gonna make us wipe the floor with ya in your own turf.” Now that got him perked up and shoved his fleeting soul back to his body, and it also sparked the flame o rivalry within the other boys. Without further ado, the match started and Tanaka was left speechless.

You were a Setter and your skills were nothing short of spectacular, both a a player alone and as a captain, and it showed in the way you managed to get your Ace past Asahi’s and Tsukishima’s blocks in the first minute of the second set, simultaneously inspiring the rest of your team to fend off against their tricks.

The many times your Libero and blockers shut down Kageyama’s and Hinata’s quick attacks took its toll on the boys and morale. Tanaka might’ve gotten distracted by your perfect form and leadership skills a few times, all of which he had to be snapped out of by Daichi.

In the end, you guys played a total of three matched, with your team winning the first and last ones. At the end of it all the coaches allowed both teams to mingle and bond, while yours gave some pointers and corrections to Karasuno, which most of them took wholeheartedly (you felt Kageyama’s glare-like-stare on you while so), all the while Tanaka stayed by your side and followed you like an adoring puppy.

“What is it?” You questioned and finally directed your attention to him as you waited outside for any signs of your bus to pick you guys up.

“You’re amazing,” Tanaka breathlessly answered, sparks in his eyes as he stared at you admiringly. “Oh my god, my s/o’s amazing...” he repeated quietly to himself, as though not believing it. You laughed aloud, not surprised by his impulsive replied but nonetheless bemused.

“Well, I couldn’t really go half-assed when passion is in everything you do. Your team’s pretty strong, so I’d have to watch out for you guys down the road.” He nodded vigorously and kept gushing about your skills, you returning each compliment with one of your own in a more lax manner. Once your bus arrived and the teams were formally bidding each other farewell, you sneaked a quick peck to your boyfriend’s unsuspecting lips.

“We oughta chat a bit more later, ’kay?” and with a final wave to your blushy, swooning boyfriend, you boarded the bus.

Nishinoya Yuu

Also through a game, but this time it’s an official one! Qualifier of the Miyagi prefecture representative for Nationals, at that.

First off, you and Nishiyona? Definition of opposites attract. Like, I’m not joking when I say the boys vb team was shooketh to their core when you sluggishly arrived at the gym one day and asked for Noya, saying he was you boyfriend.

You were pretty surprised yourself when he confessed too, considering he didn’t seem to like your lethargic, lackluster attitude that much. But according to him, “The way your eyes light up when you speak about things you’re passionate for makes up for your lack of everything else!”

And you were like, “lmao ok, let’s hang”

But all that is beyond the point! The focus here is: Noya really, really, really wanted you to come see him play in the qualifiers, seeing as you’ve missed pretty much his other big games and most matches so far, under the same excuse that you already had a prearranged event that couldn’t be postponed nor that you could miss.

While very whiny and pouty, he understood and let it slide (under the deal tat you gotta pamper him in kisses before he departs and to wish him good luck every five minutes (tops), to which you agreed humorously).

So the qualifying day is here and, under a close call, Karasuno comes out on top and the team decided to stay and watch the other matches. They sat on the bleachers of the gym and watched the ongoing match in analytical silence as they ate a few snacks.

Honestly they were... worried about this. The team that came out the victor would be the team they’d face, and one of them was destroying the other in this last set. 10-24, that’s painful to bare.

However Noya’s eyes were glued to one player, who if he had to guess, seemed to be the Ace of the winning team and an Opposite Hitter from the amount of points they’ve scored. Zoning in their oddly familiar (h/c) hair, sluggish movements whenever they were in the back row, yet never switched out for the Libero.

Karasuno was sitting in their side of the court, so he couldn’t see their face too well, but as the Ace jumped to score the final point, and turned around to face their cheering teammates, he felt his eyes widen like saucers,

“(Y/N)?!” Nishinoya shouted over the cheering of the crowd the team, but it still caught your attention at the sound of your name in the familiar tone you’ve grown accustomed to.

Encouraged by the call, you turned to look over your shoulder slowly, half-lidded eyes widening a fraction as you locked eyes with your gobsmacked boyfriend’s, his team’s nervous inquiries falling flat.

“Yuu...?” You slowly twisted your body fully to acknowledge him. He must’ve won his match then...

That’s when it dawned on you; Noya had won his match, and you did yours, that means you will be facing one another for the last round before the finals. Neither of you were going to let up, you both knew that, you also knew the barrage of questions he’ll throw your way the second you’re free were just as impending.

So, as tired and sweaty as you were, you raised an arm and five fingers, duly noting the cameras following your movements, more focused on the way Noya’s eyes widened and said, “Five minutes,”

You allowed yourself to smile intimidatingly, shifting your fingers so you were now pointing straight at him.

“Good luck.”

#haikyuu x reader #sawamura daichi x reader #nishinoya yuu x reader #sugawara koushi x reader #tanaka ryuunosuke x reader #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu!!#long post

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justkimberley · 4 years

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HSMTMTS Thoughts Episode 7

Episode 1 Episode 2 Episode 3 Episode 4 Episode 5 Episode 6

This one is also kinda long (~2200 words)

Nini and Ricky doing a fantastic job harmonizing in Start of Something New

the dance routine around them is absolutely crazy and all over the place

So it seems that Seb is just their resident piano player (side note, who ended up getting Kelsey??)

Big Red with the flashlight trying so hard to keep it on the disco ball

EJ interrupting because of the bell. Does anyone really love Thanksgiving that much??

Also I always forget that American Thanksgiving is like a month later than Canadian Thanksgiving and I was hella confused for a second.

Ricky is so surprised that Nini is complimenting him

Ashlyn as Robotics Team captain! (side note Big Red gives her an impressed look after he overhears that she’s the captain)

Also: debate team, baking club, high priestess of the Renaissance Faire

We love a multifaceted lady

Miss Jenn/Mr. Mazzarra trying to have a ‘my horse is bigger than your horse’ banter except neither of them have the horses they claim to have

“With whoever could possibly love you,” lol ok Miss Jenn went for the head

“Late night party” - party starts at 8 that’s adorable

“Small group or…” “PARTY AT ASHLYN’S HOUSE!”

It’s really interesting learning about Nini’s Lola (? I think that’s how it’s spelled, which is what I believe Filipino people call their grandmother’s), and her story

I’m just really proud of Ricky’s Dad. Like he was in such a bad place 2-3 episodes ago and now he’s taking care of himself and Ricky (even if it isn’t a grandiose Thanksgiving) he’s trying and I think he’s doing great

“We roll hard” I just really love this line

“I suppose if you’re lonely, you could always just… randomly text my drama teacher,” “Too soon… RIck,” “... yeah okay”

That was pretty funny. Also, it seems like Ricky’s okay with his dad dating?

Ricky’s mom waiting for him to call

I don’t know how I feel about this to be honest. I feel like maybe she should have tried to call him first and then if he didn’t answer or want to talk to her, that she should wait for him to make the next move then.

EJ’s truth arc is very funny to me

Big Red and Ashlyn

“I promise not to steal your phone if you promise not to throw a basketball at my face,” “No, the only thing I’d ever throw at your face is a brighter spotlight cause, I like the way you sing

Oof they’re so cute, we love little crushes

Also this might be an unpopular opinion but y’all need to calm down about the whole ‘Ashlyn and Big Red are GAY and they only THINK theyy like each other’ thing. #1 It was never confirmed for them to be gay. #2 You can still have wlw and mlm head-cannons for them! Bi, Pan, and other multiple gender attraction oriented people exist, even if you forget about us sometimes.

They are a cute little pairing of people who are always looking out and taking care of other people. It’s okay for them to do things for themselves.

Ricky debating calling his mom, it took a lot of courage and then Todd picks up.

Hangs up immediately, it almost looked like he was going to have a panic attack. That would be so hard, such an extreme shift

I guess the reason he was more okay with his Dad dating was that his Dad was open and honest with him about it. Calling your Mom only to find out that she has a boyfriend that a. She never told you about b. He knows about you and c. is trusted enough to be left alone with her phone while she showers? Is a lot, and probably means that she started dating him before the split was official.

Ricky going to call Nini and then deciding against it. Why doesn’t he feel like he can talk to Big Red about this kind of stuff? Why does he always go to Nini first?

Gina shows up, those are good looking cupcakes

She made him a hat!

She looks so hesitant before she gives it to him!

Gina’s like ‘look dude, I know something’s wrong, spill the beans’

Ignore it and push through - I understand where she’s coming from but you really shouldn’t ignore your problems, it usually just makes them worse

“Do what makes you happy,” “... Give me that hat,”

Adorable, also do what makes you happy is good advice so we’re a little all over the map here

“That’s too big,” “I’ll grow into it,” (adorable)

Miss Jenn and Mr. Mazzarra’s whole interaction is hilarious.

Don’t burn down my shop! - holy shit, foreshadowing buddies

Ashlyn is so cute! She’s so happy when people compliment her

“I highly recommend not telling someone you love them for the first time on instagram” - yup! That’s what I said in the first one of these I did.

Carlos - “The party may begin!” - I totally thought he said “The party made me gay,” the first time I watched it so uhh yeah

Big Red is lactose intolerant

Carlos’ board game is amazing

“High School Musical the Choosical,” - fantastic name

Everyone is so accepting

Ashlyn and Big Red choosing to be on the same team

“South Side Knights -” “It’s the West High Nights,” “the West High Knights”

Ej is like a compulsive truther now. And it’s kind of hilarious

His face when he says “She laughed!” is hilarious and kind of adorable

“I gotta go join the party, and admit some terrible things, you ladies, catch up!” - I wish we got to see what he was admitting to, I find this whole thing quite funny

I’m glad that Emily and Nini got some reconciliation, I know Nini felt guilty even though it wasn’t her fault

That is not a good cockney accent

Why did Ricky enter alone when him and Gina walked together?

And he left her to open the door on her own with all those cupcakes?

“Buddies,” “We,”

Ricky and Gina both laughing about YouTube, cuties

Look, feelings are feelings and you can’t help what you feel, but pushing someone away and insisting to remain only friends means that you shouldn’t be upset when he makes a new friend

Mr. Mazzara and Miss Jenn

The plug socket is in the frame, more foreshadowing

“He won’t.. Not… fall” this show loves it’s double negatives huh? I don’t not love you, he won’t not fall etc.

“Ok but the center of gravity is off,” YES to different kinds of intelligence being helpful in fields other than the main one people associate them with

Carlos thinking people are going to keep judging him and the theater people being as accepting as possible

EJ is a gleek

What I’ve Been Looking For to the rhythm of Get Your Head in the Game is hard! (Catch me on the piano later trying to figure it out lol)

It just turns into a terrible rap

EJ - “That was terrible,” Seb - “I’m so happy”

EJ vs. Ricky - “without laughing… or killing each other,”

This is a good parallel to the basketball scene, once again they get kind of aggressive, but this time they also joke around and no one gets hurt

Also I would love to see them become friends, I mean they both need to grow a little before that happens, but I have hopes

They missed the ‘neeee howww’ part of it, I really wanted to hear them do the high voices

EJ’s little “mehh” that sounds like a duck kills me everytime

Gina and Nini awkwarddd

“I do have high hopes for a junior year at East High” oof babey :(

“It must be nice sometimes though, right?” - nini does not understand

This actually gives us an insight as to why they don’t understand each other. Nini would love nothing more than to start a new life with no drama and Gina would love nothing more than to have a life that lasts longer than a couple months before being restarted.

Gina/Nini apology very exciting, hopefully they can actually become friends

“It’s all good,” from Nini seemed disingenuous, I don’t know if it’s because of the Wonderstudy thing or the Ricky thing.

The sleepover thing I was so worried that it would be a mean spirited thing but I’m so glad it wasn’t

Nini sits on Ricky’s lap when she goes back to the game room and I don’t know if it’s intentional or not but it’s kind of like she’s trying to lay her claim back on Ricky.

Gina looks so happy when a. Carlos calls her in and b. the happy dance about the sleepover! (why’d they have to ruin the happiness??)

Mr. Mazarra returning the favour

“It’s beautiful,” “Math often is,” dudde I feel you I fucking love math

“I cannot stress to you enough how uncomfortable that would make me feel,”

“You know what we should do?” “Break off eye contact sometime soon?”

I’m dying

“It’s about a robot!” this is… pretty adorable. She just wants to make a genuine connection with him

Also are they going to do a romance route with these two? Because I can see them setting it up but also imagine if they just become like… best friends? I feel like they’d be unstoppable.

Musical Choosical Handbook of Rulesicals

“I thought you had never actually played this with people-” “Honey not today of all days,”

Carlos and Seb are the only couple with no bad drama and I’m living for it (please let them just stay happy)

Oops! I knew that jersey question… also it’s definitely the answer Big Red would now because he’s only watched the movie with no words (at his allergists office)

“And do people usually talk like that?” “No they do not.” - gold

EJ the compulsive cheater and also compulsive truther makes a comeback (I seriously find this so funny I don’t know why)

“I love to pop and lock and jam and break,” oh GIna

She’s so happy about winning

Not realistic, you know that the second she called her mom at least someone would be like “pass the weed,” (you know because friends are awesome and also terrible)

“Can you take me off speaker”

Some people are like ‘oh no is she in trouble?’

I kind of hate that it looks like Nini looks sort of happy about Gina’s mom asking her to take her off speaker - I really don’t want Nini to turn into a catty person.

Ricky is concerned

Why did her mom tell her this right now? She should have waited until the next morning, like that wouldn’t have hurt anyone and it would have let them form stronger bonds. And Gina would have had her first sleepover and also they might form strong enough bonds to try and stay in contact with her

Ricky is worried for her, he’s like, ‘You made me feel better, so I’ll go make you feel better’

Nini’s looking upset that Ricky’s being emotionally aware for once? Like dude, he’s grown up a lot since BEFORE summer break? That’s like six months ago I think at this point?

Ricky just wants to help Gina feel better because she made him feel better

She doesn’t understand that they can stay friends even if she leaves and I just :(

“Please don’t do that” he’s so overwhelmed

“My mom moved out two weeks ago and she’s already got a new boyfriend, sound familiar?” Oooh low blow Ricky bud.

“Really don’t need advice from a .. buddy right now,”

Ok but then who does Ricky want advice from? I’m so confused. This boy needs to get a better support system and learn how to use it. Romantic relationships should not be your only outlet for your problems.

Red and Ashlyn

“I hope Gina’s gonna be okay,” - Big Red is so sweet!

They’re so cute

“Hey Big Red? Don’t forget your dip,” - oh she was so going to ask him out and then lost the nerve

Write something for yourself.

It’s a hard thing to do, dude. It’s also hard to let yourself feel so vulnerable, even if it’s only you that’s going to hear it

Gina packing, I feel so sad for her, she’s finally made some good friends and now she has to leave again. She kept the badge! :(

EJ losing followers and being cancelled, at least we know why now

It seems like a lot of EJ’s self worth comes from how others think of him. So losing followers is probably a pretty big hit. I wonder if he’ll keep going with his whole truth thing when it has these consequences or if he’ll just go back to what he was doing before. I hope that he has a positive arc but, will it go downhill from here? I hope not.

Ricky about to apologise to Nini (why did he erase it, he probably should have sent that) - side note: their conversation before was them asking each other if they were going to the party

It’s interesting that Nini had pictures of EJ and Ricky up still

Gina’s crying face is making me cry

“Hey mom, it’s me, I miss you so much,” tears

Nini hanging up pictures of her grandma and the musical. She’s really trying to move forward from boys huh?

Is nini going to apply to the theater school??

Electrical fire???????? WHy??

#hsmtmts #hsmtmts spoilers #episode 7 #kimberleysthoughts #mypost #kimberleyreacts #feel free to come yell into the void with me about this show #the void is always open #(the void is the name of my askbox lol)

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risingfire17-the-weeb-trash · 5 years

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Amuto Fic (Working Title)

A/N: This is the first chapter in what I hope is going to be a multi-chapter fic. Also, if anyone has any ideas for a title, please send them over. Dedicated to my precious babies: Amu and Ikuto! Also, trigger warning for an abusive relationship (her ex was a massive dick).

Also, shoutout to @oodlittlething and @noviceotakus-blog for proofreading and offering tech support!!

~~~~~

The ringing phone shocked 16-year-old Amu Hinamori back into the present moment as her close friend Berkeley Walker laughed at her startled expression.

“Spacing out again, were we?” the latter asked with a kind chuckle. Berkeley was one of Amu’s best friends, by her side ever since she started at her new high school in Cupertino, California, two years ago, after moving there with her parents and younger sister from Japan. Berkeley, herself a transfer from Albuquerque, New Mexico, (which, she assured Amu, was as different from San Jose as the latter from Japan, despite being in the same country) was a loud and confident girl, tough when the need arose, but surprisingly calm and level-headed. She was on the volleyball and martial arts teams at their school, and had met Amu in their homeroom class freshman year; the two transfers had learned to navigate their new school together. Amu was so happy to have found someone as strong as Berkeley to count on during her first year in America!

Today they were on the bus to meet their friend Suzie Chen. They had befriended Suzie last year, before she switched to the private girls’ school she currently attended following her father’s company’s relocation across town. Though she was doing well at her new school, she said she missed her friends terribly and couldn’t wait to see them today. The studio where she studied violin after school was giving free promotional lessons today, and despite Berkeley’s claim that she “100 percent lacked that kind of coordination,” Suzie had successfully convinced the girls to attend. Amu was also uncertain whether she possessed any sort of musical talent, but was dying to see Suzie, and figured the violin would be fun to try out, at least once. Suzie’s violin had such a lovely sound, peaceful and warm like a springtime afternoon spent frolicking in meadow blossoms. But just now, Amu had been thinking of another violin, slower, more melancholy notes, and a kind man with a terribly sad smile….

“I hope it was a nice daydream, Amu-chan,” chimed their acquaintance Yuki Yotoba sweetly as she walked to the front of the parked bus, waving good-bye to the two girls. Yuki-chan is so kind-hearted, even after I spaced out the entire time she was on the bus with us…I’ll have to make it up to her later! Thought Amu to herself. Yuki, aiming to attend nursing school, volunteered almost every day after school at the hospital, so they didn’t see each other much, but happened to be taking her bus today. A quiet, sweet-mannered girl like her would be a perfect nurse! She would definitely need to properly apologize next time! Maybe if she kept taking violin lessons, she could see Yuki-chan more, and become better friends with her!

Amu grinned sheepishly, looking down more than necessary to fish the still-ringing phone from her bag in an attempt to hide her flushed cheeks. How silly! How long had it been since she had seen, or even thought of, that person anyway? She retrieved the phone, answered the video call, and was greeted with Utau Hoshina’s beaming face. Amu was ecstatic; Utau was one of Amu’s closest friends from Japan, though they could rarely talk with Utau’s busy schedule. She worked so hard, having become a Japanese pop sensation while still in middle school, and was now, at age 19, singing internationally and also acting, having landed a major role in a hit TV series being filmed in Los Angeles, all while pursuing her degree in communications! “Moshi-moooooooooooooosh,” Utau sang into the phone in a playful voice. “Oh, hi Berkeley! This is perfect!” she exclaimed, switching to English for their American friend. “Did you two get your tickets for this Saturday?”

“Yes we did, thank you so much!” The girls were practically jumping out of their seats now. This Saturday, Utau was performing in nearby San Francisco, and they would see each other in person for the first time since her concert there last year.

“Good, I’d better see my two biggest fans there!” she said with a wink. “After all, I’ve been working super hard for you!” After a brief pause, she added, “Oh, I think you’ll like the opening band too, it’s a local one performing especially for the San Francisco concert.” Berkeley squealed with excitement.

“A band from here? What kind of band?”

“Indie rock. I met them last time I was in SF. A bunch of sweaty, grungy-haired guys,” she said with a grimace, “but their sound is nice. Soft guitar rifts with a piano. Just got a violinist too, pretty classy stuff. Now if only they would wash their hair more often! They better not embarrass me!” Amu’s stomach tightened slightly at the mention of the violin, remembering a certain Indie band Utau had briefly been involved with while they were still in Japan. An Easter project. Angsty pop music with a sad violin….

“-so not fair! Just because he’s a jock doesn’t mean he doesn’t wash his hair! Besides, you’ve never actually met him!” They were talking about Utau’s boyfriend and Amu’s former classmate, Kukai Soma. He was in his final year of high school in Japan, diligently studying every moment he wasn’t participating in extra basketball practice. A star player and stellar student, his dream was to secure a basketball scholarship to UCLA so he could get a US visa and move close to Utau. She acted like it didn’t matter if he came to America or not, but she always asked him how his UCLA application was going, adding a “not that I care particularly.” Kukai was shining with confidence, so sure that he would secure that scholarship no matter what! It must be harder on them than they let on, thought Amu, to live so far apart, as they have for most of their relationship, since Utua had started touring internationally shortly after they started dating over three years ago. But they were so strong and supportive of each other’s dreams. Oh please, please let Kukai-kun get that scholarship!

“Amu, please tell Berkeley that Kukai isn’t grungy!”

Amu chuckled. Utau may pout, but Amu knew she enjoyed the teasing, especially when it gave her an excuse to talk about her boyfriend; Utau had confided that it helped make him seem less far away, not that it bothered her, of course. Amu rolled her eyes and smiled. The girls stopped laughing just in time to hear their stop announced and began to gather their bags. “You two have a violin lesson today, right?”

“Yeah, Suzie’s studio is giving free lessons today, so we decided to try it!” Utau’s softened, then narrowed mischievously as she broke into a teasing smile.

“Amu, will you become a great violinist like Ikuto?” Again, Amu caught herself blushing. This time, Berkeley caught her as well.

“Ooh Amu, you’re blushing! Who is Ikuto, a cute boy?”

“As if! Ikuto is Utau’s man-child pervert of a brother! And he’s lucky he was able to record music, because he certainly can’t keep a real job!” she said a little too loudly, all the while cursing her cheeks for blushing so brightly and begging them not to turn redder. Berkeley laughed as the bus pulled up to their stop, while Utau just narrowed her eyes, smiling even wider with a “hmmmmmmmmmm.” Amu wanted to melt away. But why? Ikuto Tsukiyomi really was just her friend’s man-child pervert of a brother. Why did everyone think he should be anything else. Even Tadase….

Suddenly Utau’s face was a great bright smile again. “Well, ladies, my break is over! I’ll see you both Saturday!” The girls said good-bye as they exited the bus, Suzie waiting for them in her school’s uniform and carrying her violin case. Berkeley called out to her in her loud, emphatic voice (a credit to her Midwestern roots, she had explained):

“Oi, Suzie, look at our prim, proper paragon of wifey material! You ready to school us in ‘etiquette befitting a lady,’ or whatever it’s called?” But before they were fully in earshot of their friend, Berkeley clapped Amu on the back and whispered, “You’ll tell me all about Ikuto later, right?” She ran ahead with a carefree smile and wink.

It was true that Amu had never told Berkeley about Ikuto, even though she was her closest friend in America, knew about all her friends from Japan, and had met most of them, at least electronically. Kukai-kun she had met last year through a video chat with Utau while she was home for a visit. She had joined Amu in Skype calls with Nagihiko Fujisaki and his boyfriend Richie Preston, who both studied dance in England. She followed Nagi-kun’s dance videos on Instagram, and had even seen videos from his days as Nadeshiko. Berkeley frequently chatted with Rima Mashiro, Amu’s closest female friend in Japan. Rima-chan and Nagi-kun had dated for a while, but broke up after he moved to England for high school. Not everyone could handle a long distance relationship as well as Utau-chan and Kukai-kun, after all! Rima-chan and Berkeley turned out to share a love of comedy, so despite the latter’s “uncouth American manner,” Rima “approved” of her. Geez, that girl could be such a tsundere at times! Why can’t she just admit that she loves talking to Berkeley?

As did Yaya Yuiki, who, practicing for her dream of becoming a preschool teacher, took it upon herself to give Berkeley regular Japanese lessons via Skype. Amu had tried to tell her teaching preschoolers and teaching a high school student Japanese weren’t exactly the same thing, to which she responded “But if she knows that little, it’s almost the same thing right?” Honestly, Yaya-chan could be the uncouth one at times! It wasn’t Berkeley’s fault she didn’t know much Japanese! Apparently most American schools don’t teach any foreign language until high school, and even then only the Spanish of neighboring Mexico! Really! How did any of their students go to school abroad? Amu couldn’t imagine starting high school in America without having taken English since elementary school!

Berkeley had never met Kairi Sanjo, but knew him as the polite boy from Amu’s emails. He was too old-fashioned for the social media that kept Amu in constant communication with the rest of her friends, probably because it’s too “worldly” for his devout samurai lifestyle. In his final year of middle school and top in his class, he was applying to schools in Europe and America. He has even applied to a school in San Francisco, so maybe Amu would see him again soon!

She had shown Berkeley pictures of him at his sister Yukari’s wedding to Yuu Nikaido. Berkeley had met Yukari Sanjo-san, Utau’s manager, at last year’s concert, and knew Nikaido-sensei had been Amu’s teacher in elementary school. Amu had let it slip that those two used to be bad, but she let Berkeley think she was only talking about Sanjo-san’s addiction to take-out and Nikaido-sensei’s dangerous level of clumsiness. After all, Easter, the Embryo, and the Guardians were probably things she could never talk about with anyone, no matter how close the person or how fond the memories. Besides, that was all so long ago; they were good people now, a sweet couple with an adorable child, a 3-year-old girl named Su Nikaido. The name always made Amu swell with pride.

Berkeley knew of Amu’s mentees, Rikka Hiiragi and Hikaru Ichinomiya, now in middle school, and both knew of her, though she hadn’t talked directly to either. Rikka was too embarrassed by her poor English, but studied and looked forward to properly introducing herself in English someday, and Hikaru was busy with his intense studies and taking on more and more control of Easter, aiming to be able to run the company on his own by the time he came of age. Though he still found time for surprise visits to cheer Rikka-chan on at her track meets, always saying he “just happened to be free, no big deal,” when she jumped for joy to see him. Poor boy, thought Amu, Rikka doesn’t read the mood very well, and will take him at his word until he tells her how he feels honestly! When she told Berkeley about it, she responded that from what Amu said about him, he seemed like the type who wasn’t entirely aware of how he felt to begin with, which made a lot of sense to Amu.

Berkeley had a true gift for understanding people in that way. She pretended not to notice the inner conflicts people either didn’t understand or tried to hide, but she could tell, and when she did, she would give an elongated, kind of knowing glance, as if to say: “when you’re ready to talk, I am here.” And that look made people want to talk to her about it, not least of all Amu herself. Berkeley should really study to be a therapist, because she would make a great one!

In Amu’s case, a much-welcomed therapist. In the last year, Amu’s guardian characters had all been reabsorbed into her, first Ran, then Miki, then Su, and finally Dia. She knew it would happen eventually. As children grow up and become their would-be selves, they no longer need these selves to exist outside of them. When it happened depended on the person and how well they matured into their would-be selves, but losing a guardian character was a natural fact of growing up. The girls assured Amu that they would always be there inside her, but she still missed having them to talk to. How wonderful, though, that she had grown up into a girl who could talk honestly with her friends just the way she had with her guardian characters, like a normal person! And how especially wonderful to have such a good friend to talk to, all the way here in America, who she could talk openly to with no fear of judgement! Come to think of it, she thought, except for those secrets she couldn’t tell anyone, she had told Berkeley almost everything about her past.

So why, after knowing the rest of Amu’s history, did Berkeley never even get a mention of Ikuto? Well, first off, Amu wasn’t sure where to start with Ikuto; he was such a confusing man. She had met him in elementary school, and, like Nikaido-sensei, Sanjo-san, and even Utau-chan, he was once an Easter employee who corrupted and shattered children’s hearts’ eggs. But he didn’t have a choice; that was never something he wanted. Although what did he want, anyway? He sometimes seemed happiest when left alone to play violin in the park and then curl up to sleep on a bench. Though if he was truly happy, then why did the music he played in those moments seem so incredibly sad?

Other times, he seemed to enjoy teasing children, particularly Amu and her friends. He especially loved picking on Amu, telling her he loved her, kissing her cheeks, and all kinds of creepy things, then laughing at her confusion before disappearing, reassuring her that he would never do anything like “that.” (Whatever “that” was!) And then he would turn up months later, napping on her balcony, or even in her bed! Geez, he was just like a stray cat! Maybe I should have left tuna out for him, thought Amu with a smirk.

But even Ikuto seemed to know when to stop playing sometimes. Fighting Easter, there were so many times Amu could have gotten hurt, or worse. She had been kidnapped, shot at, and pushed off of buildings, and hadn’t Ikuto defied his boss’s orders countless times to save her when that happened? Why would he do that, though? If she wasn’t able to fight Easter, wouldn’t that make his job so much easier? Didn’t he get in trouble over that sort of thing? Hadn’t he actually been hurt after letting her escape that one time? He had been so helpless and alone, that Yoru had begged her, the enemy, to help him. Of course she had, because those injuries were her fault.

Maybe he actually does love you, thought a small voice in her head, which she quickly drowned out. Yeah, right! He probably just didn’t want Easter to stop him from being able to torment me, like a cat guarding its favorite toy!

Besides, it wasn’t like he treated the people he claimed to care for very well anyway. He left to look for his father, all the while cursing him for abandoning his family; he disowned his mother, still in the asylum after Aruto-san’s disappearance, and he had left his little sister Utau to raise herself any way she knew how, even if that meant becoming a puppet of Easter. Even now, he was the only one she would openly show affection for (she could be cold even to Kukai-kun), and he still would only see her if he was paid enough to perform with her. He had been especially cruel in constantly bullying Tadase Hatori, who had looked up to him and called him Nii-san.

Tadase. Amu’s first love. Their relationship had ended badly, and Amu still partially blamed Ikuto for it. Amu had admired Tadase since fourth grade, and their Guardian adventures had brought them together in fifth grade, leading to a relationship spanning sixth and part of seventh grade. He had been such a kind boy at first, giving everything he worked at and everyone he cared for his all. It was probably this absolute dedication that had drawn Amu to him in the first place. Once they started dating, he doted on her, always checking in with her, surprising her, looking for new ways to show her his love. But after they went to different middle schools, Tadase changed. He became a bit…too dedicated. It probably started with the constant texts. They had been so sweet in the beginning:

“I hope you’re having a great day.”

“I know you will do fantastic on your test today.”

“Thank you for being in my life.”

“I love you.”

But then they became weird. Obsessive. And constant. She had sometimes felt drowned in texts that made her feel…off. Like, kind of drained and even kind of nervous for some reason she couldn’t place her finger on.

“Do you truly love me?”

“There’s no one else for you, right?”

“Why won’t you text back?” He would text her in class! He may have been smart enough to get into a special middle school for gifted students, but she actually had to pay attention in class to keep up, thanks very much! Then he started obsessively asking her friends about her. Yaya-chan and Rima-chan had complained about the constant “why won’t Amu text me? Is she okay?” texts while they were in class. He would even show up unexpectedly after school, expecting long walks while he prattled on he, blissfully ignorant of her concern over her missed student club meetings or the test she needed to study for, prattled on about how he would graduate from his elite school and get a fantastic job so he could meet her every need and she wouldn’t need to lift a finger. She never felt like she could tell him she didn’t want to be taken care of like a child.

Ikuto had texted her during those years too, sending pictures of his adventures in Europe and asking about his “little Prince” Tadase. He teased them both so much, and Amu had yelled at Ikuto for constantly berating Tadase to “hurry and grow up man enough for Amu,” and threatening to steal her away. Honestly, didn’t that man have anything better to do than pick on kids? Looking back, Amu couldn’t help but wonder if Ikuto’s bullying had pushed Tadase to become so freakishly possessive of her.

Ikuto had been there New Year’s Day of seventh grade, that painful day, and Amu still wondered if things could have been different had Ikuto not been there. Of course, things had not been going well with Tadase to begin with, but they had talked about a fresh start in the new year; she loved him so, so much, and she still had hope that things could work! It started off well; Amu and Tadase met with Yaya-chan, Rima-chan, and Nagi-kun (who had only recently confessed that he and Nadeshiko were one and the same, and while Amu liked Nagi-kun a lot, she was still trying to get used to it) at the town’s New Year Festival. The girls had gotten matching hair ornaments, and Tadase had bought hers for her. Nagi-kun had offered to buy Rima-chan’s, which she had proudly refused, although not without a blush. Everyone was not-so-patiently waiting for them to finally realize they liked each other! Amu had added a new year’s prayer for them, in addition to her prayers her strained relationship with Tadase. Oh, how she had prayed with all her might when it was her turn at the shrine that year! She had felt so fresh and new afterward, and after seeing Tadase’s old, kind smile and taking his soft, strong hand, she really did believe that everything would be okay….

And then Ikuto arrived, lazily strolling behind a red-faced, pouting Kukai-kun, something about “hurry and grow up man enough for my little sister,” and “oh that’s rich coming from someone who only came to her concert because he was paid to open for her!” As soon as they arrived, Tadase had tensed, and Amu with him. As the day went on, things had gotten worse, and all because Ikuto wouldn’t mind his own damn business!

He had tried to buy her a hair ornament, saying the one she had looked too childish for her. Despite her insistence that she didn’t need fashion advice from a nosy man-child, Tadase had gripped her hand more tightly, as he had started to do lately when he was becoming jealous.

When they visited a maze to be completed in groups of two or three, Ikuto just had to crash Amu and Tadase, saying he “couldn’t possibly trust his mischievous little brother with Princess Amu.” Tadase had been silent the whole time, his face a dark shadow, and his hand had gripped hers ever more tightly. Her hand had even hurt! Despite the tension and pain, Amu had tried her best to laugh, smile, and bring joy back to their day, which had only seemed to anger Tadase even more, resulting in an even tighter grip. And that damn Ikuto had not helped, but simply strolled along whistling to himself, his obliviousness to the awkwardness he caused even more painful than Tadase’s grip.

The final straw had been in the early evening, right before show, when they stopped to get hot drinks. Tadase had gotten Amu and himself hot chocolates-huge with mounds of whipped cream and toppings, an extravagant peace offering typical of Tadase. Amu had sipped hers slowly to prevent a massive rush of sugar to her underprepared stomach, allowing the heat to sooth her cramping hand. Ikuto was taking forever getting his drink, Kukai-kun had gone backstage with Utau, and Nagi-kun and the girls were singing and dancing in anticipation of the concert, leaving Amu and Tadase to finally get some time to themselves. They sat silently, feeling each others’ warmth, watching as the night’s first stars fought to shine in the fading twilight. His hand had caressed hers so softly; how could it possibly have been the same hand to crush hers so just an hour past? It was moments like these when Amu remembered the warm, kind boy who wanted to walk forever by her side, protecting her heart, and oh, how she wanted him to so, so much! If only time could have frozen in that last perfect moment….

And then Ikuto had shown up with two apple ciders, holding one out to Amu. “Yo, Amu,” he had said with that devilish smirk of his, “I got an extra cider, you can have it if you like,” and then with a sneer at her hot chocolate, “after all, you only drink milk after a bath, no?”

Amu had screamed at Ikuto to stop saying such perverted things, demanding to know if he had anything better to do that harass children, but the damage had been done. Tadase had flown to his feet, cocoa spilled, face red, fists clenched. He had opened his mouth, but uttered no words, and finally just pushed past Ikuto, storming off. Amu had wanted to call to him, to say anything to heal his wounded heart, but her voice had been caught in her throat, no words able to reach him, no thoughts able to comprehend this situation she found herself in. Instead, with Tadase out of her reach, she had unleashed all her feelings on Ikuto in a fierce rage.

“Why do you always ruin everything? Why do you like seeing me hurt? Why can’t you just leave me alone?” Looking back on it, Amu had hurled some pretty hurtful words at Ikuto, and for the first time, he had looked fazed, eyes open wide, face blank with shock as Amu continued to rant.

It was Rima-chan, in her fierce protection mode, who had stood between them with a curt “I think you should go, and Nagi-kun, in his rational, peace-keeping way, who offered, “I think there are some things to talk about that might be better discussed when everyone has had a bit of time to cool down.” Ikuto had just continued to stare in shock for what had seemed like an eternity before finally turning and walking away, slumped and defeated.

Amu’s friends had tried their best to help her enjoy what was left of the festival, as she had tried to take joy in their kind efforts. Rima-chan had shown her a comedy routine she had been working on, breaking her rule of only showing complete work (a rule she now broke frequently with her comedic partner Berkeley), Nagi-kun had offered to put his hair up and talk to her as Nadeshiko, an gesture met with a vigorous offer of hair ribbons from Yaya-chan and a jealous pout from Rima-chan. Both Nagi-kun and Kukai-kun (who must have been surprised to rejoin them and ask about Tadase only to be met with tears and sad glances) offered to talk to Tadase, “help him resolve things, man to man,” as Kukai-kun had put it. They had watched skits and acrobats, jugglers and dancers, Amu and her friends, and she laughed and smiled with gratitude for them, almost forgetting her heartbreak, but when a concert agent rushed past them, screaming into his headset to get Utau ready faster because “that damn violinist cancelled his opening act,” Amu’s heart tightened, and she took a bathroom break that became a long walk by herself.

She hadn’t meant to travel so far, all the way to the abandoned fence at the edge of the festival grounds, but she had found what her heart was searching for: Tadase, head down, covered in shadow and gloom. Oh, how she had run to him, so determined to set things straight and heal both their aching hearts once and for all! But when she had met his eyes, she had met with a crazed glare, piercing her from under disheveled hair.

“Oh, you finally showed up,” he had almost growled, as if he was so angry he didn’t even see her worth talking to as a person anymore. Amu’s stomach had been filled with so much dread, but still she must push on!

“Tadase-“

“Do you really only drink milk after a bath? Should I have waited to get you chocolate till you bathed? Would you have drank it then?”

“Tadase, I-“

“Why the hell do you let him talk to you like that? Do you like that?”

“No one can stop his teasing! You know that! It’s not like it means anything! He’s a adult, for heaven’s sake! An immature one, but an adult! He’s not…not like us!”

“It’s not just him! Everyone loves you, and you just let it happen like you like all the attention! What about Kairi? He confessed to you, didn’t he? Did you ever actually tell him no?”

“He…he didn’t really give me a chance to before he left, did he?” She stammered, not understanding just what he thought was going on. “Besides, I think choosing you is a clear enough rej-“

“And Kukai liked you too! Did you pretend not to notice?”

“What are you-? Kukai-kun is with Utau-chan!”

“And have you seen the way Nagihiko looks at you? Although it’s not surprising; you even spent the night at his house!”

“We thought he was a girl and you know it! Don’t you dare…Nagihi-no, Nadeshiko was my best friend!” This was when she had started to cry. Amu cared for Nagi-kun, and was happy he could be his true self. But at that time, Amu was still feeling the lost of her first female best friend.

Her tears had only made Tadase snarl. “And now you cry for him?! You cry for Nagi, for Ikuto, who won’t you cry for?” and after a pause, “you were supposed to be mine only, but who doesn’t your heart belong to?” And then he had grabbed her wrist, holding it over her head, backing her up against the fence.

“Tadase, you’re hurting me!” she had screamed into vacant space, all festival-goers still at the concert. She had struggled against his grip, only to have her other wrist captured and pinned to the fence, escape impossible.

“But you let Ikuto do this all the time, don’t you? Am I not good enough? Should I try harder?” His grip even tighter, Amu was crying. She had wanted to scream that he wasn’t making any sense, that this wasn’t the Tadase she knew. She wanted to beg for her old Tadase back, but she couldn’t speak; her words were drowned out by fear and pain. Through her tears, the world had appeared to be spinning in front of her, swallowing her. Even Kiseki had begged Tadase to stop, insisting that rule by fear was not the way to get real control of the world or even one person in it, but, in that moment, Tadase rejected his guardian character as “weak,” declaring that he would be a king by his own strength. Amu had watched as Kiseki was forced back into his egg only to disintegrate forever, destroyed by Tadase’s will that was still strangling Amu, nearly breaking her wrists. Meanwhile, Ran, Miki, Su, and Dia were screaming for Amu to transform, but she couldn’t reach her Humpty Lock in her captivity. And even if she had been able to, could Amu really turn her guardian characters on the boy who taught her to accept them in the first place; did she truly have it in her him, even then?

She had never been forced to decide. Tadase had been suddenly thrown backward through the air, crumpling in a heap on the ground. Without Kiseki, he no longer had the heightened resistance to physical damage granted to guardian bearers. Even so, he had raised his bleeding head only to meet the iron claws of Ikuto’s character transformation preventing any further attack. Amu had approached cautiously, the arm Ikuto spread out to block her from Tadase’s reach unnecessary; her throbbing wrists reminded her not to get any closer. There had been a moment of silence that felt absolutely endless, where Amu was swimming in so many nightmares all swirling together right in front of her while she searched in vain for some piece of…something…something that made sense for her to cling to in this upheaved world. She couldn’t even look up as she said the only words that felt so heartbreakingly right: “Tadase, I…can’t do this anymore. Please don’t ever come near me again.”

And then she had run, unable to face Tadase, Ikuto, her friends, anyone. She ran all the way home, all the way upstairs and to her room, unable to face her alarmed parents or whimpering sister. And how could she have, how could she explain the dreadful things that had just happened when she couldn’t even make sense of them herself? Even her four would-be selves had been unable to offer useful words, and so just waited with her, silent, sad, scared as she was.

How long had she been there, braced against her door as if she could keep the hurt out? An eternity? Two? More? before her mother knocked gently on the door, promising they could talk when she was ready, but a bath and some sleep would help her most. She had also assured her that when her worried friends had called, she had let them know Amu was safe and just needed some rest. In that moment, Amu had been so grateful for her mother’s gentle understanding nature that she followed her suggestion and took a bath, massaging her bruised wrists as the hot water wore away at some of the despair. When she had emerged, a glass of milk was waiting on her desk, and Amu even had even managed a smile at her mother’s thoughtfulness. She had taken the milk to her balcony and the refreshing night breeze, only to see Ikuto sitting on the railing, feet hanging over the street below. As she stood in the doorway in shock, he had turned to face her, tears streaking his face.

“I’m sorry.”

His voice came out as nothing but a hoarse whisper. She knew he wasn’t just apologizing for what had happened to her, but she also felt it was for something other than the teasing that had caused it. She didn’t entirely understand what he was apologizing for that could move him to tears like this, nor did she want to know at that moment. On top of everything that had happened already, this was just too much.

“Amu, what do I do?”

“I don’t know Ikuto. I’m just a kid. I don’t know.” She couldn’t stand his long, sad gaze, wanting something from her she could neither understand nor provide. “Please go,” she had whispered, unsure of her words at first, and then, louder and with more conviction, “please.”

Her final glimpse of Ikuto was still burned into her mind. A smile so wide, not his usual teasing grin, but a genuinely kind, well-wishing smile, one concealing so much pain. His eyes closed, shutting in the rest of his tears as his face still glistened. “Hurry and grow up, Amu.” An uncharacteristically gentle voice, cracking at the end. And then he had jumped to the ground and leapt away into the night, his silhouette revealing the cat’s ears and tail of his would-be self.

The coming days and weeks would involve doctor visits, calls to Tadase’s parents, and many precautions in place for Amu’s safety: her parents working more from home, her friends accompanying her to and from school, and the watchful eyes of Nikaido-sensei and Tsukasa-san over her as she continued to study.

Tadase would never speak to her again, either because he was decent enough to at least do that for her, or because he knew how well protected she was and was afraid to approach her. Amu had been so shocked, scared, and heartbroken during that time, but she had so many people supporting her along the way, that she eventually learned to feel normal and once again began to shine with hope for the future. By the time she left for her new world a year and a half later, she had become able to talk about Tadase, both the good and bad, just like every other piece of her past. When her new friend Berkeley had asked if she had ever dated before, she was able to her the honest story of Tadase, a kind boy with so much love to give that it had consumed him and made him sick.

She left Ikuto out of the story, though she had thought about him for a long time, perhaps even longer than she had about Tadase. Not that it meant anything, of course. It was simply that her situation with Tadase was clear. She could mull over what had caused it or what could have been different, and she had, but the fact was that he had hurt her and she could not safely be around him anymore. There was no point in further speculation.

But Amu had struggled more to put Ikuto out of her mind. She could tell that night that there was so much more he had wanted to say, but she herself had silenced his words, that secret heart she couldn’t carry back then. But she couldn’t help wondering just what was in that heart, and how did it concern her? Would he ever tell her now? Why hadn’t she listened when she had the chance, before he had stopped talking to her?

She would hear he was back in Europe, still searching for his father and becoming quite a popular performer, but she would receive no more pictures of his travels, no more blurry phone recordings of his cabaret concerts, no more questions about school and if she was grown up yet, no more teasing. Nothing. She had half expected him to arrive uninvited when her friends threw her a going away party the weekend before she left for America. But he did not, and after leaving for a corner of the Earth so far away he couldn’t possibly reach, he eventually faded from her thoughts. Maybe that was for the best. She had so much to be getting on with; she couldn’t spend what little was left of her childhood haunted by that enigma of a man, teasing yet protective, that sad smile, that melancholy melody pulling on her heart….

Amu hadn’t realized that she was now a considerable number of paces behind her friends, or that there were tears in her eyes. Berkeley and Suzie looked back at her, concern on their faces. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry; I think some of that concrete powder or whatever got in my eyes!” She pointed to the taped off area about twenty feet behind them, where two construction workers drilled into the ground with a jackhammer, and started to laugh. Suzie, bless her heart, pulled out a handkerchief, with which Amu pretended to wipe specks from her eyes. Berkeley gave her that knowing gaze, and Amu laughed sheepishly, knowing she had some explaining to do later. When she had recovered herself, they walked the remaining block to the studio and checked in at the table outside.

“Ah, Miss Chen, Mrs. Mansfield had to take her maternity leave early, but the substitute for your class agreed to start covering early, so you will be in good hands.”

“Thank you very much, Mr. Nishida,” said Suzie in her sweet, refined voice to the studio manager. “Is everything all right with Mrs. Mansfield?”

“Baby came a bit early, but all is well. A healthy boy. Mrs. Mansfield will be back with us in about two months, after she’s had time to settle in. It’s her first, after all!”

“Of course, thank you so much for taking such good care of us all. Please send my regards to Mrs. Mansfield.”

“Surely, Miss Chen. Now, are these two sweet friends of yours here for today’s promotional lessons?”

“Yes, Mr. Nishida. Amu Hinamori and Berkeley Walker. Would it trouble Mrs. Mansfield’s substitute to take them in my class for the day?

“I’m sure it would be fine. He may be a bit rough-looking, but he seems like the type who can handle himself well. Now, Miss Hinamori and Miss Walker, loaner violins are available by the table at the start of the main hall. Once you’ve got those, just follow Suzie and let her teacher know you’re promotional students today. Have a great time and welcome!”

After they got their violins, they filed into Suzie’s class, gushing about what a sweet gentleman Mr. Nishida was, calling them “Miss!” Suzie explained that while Mr. Nishida was a very sweet man indeed, it was common, even expected, to call music students “Mr.” and “Miss,” rather than by the more common first name. Berkeley exclaimed “wow, so proper!” in wide-eyed amazement, while Amu was reminded fondly of the honorifics of her native Japan. The substitute appeared to be a few minutes late, so the girls watched as Suzie set up her instrument and attempted to copy her movements. How does she make poise look so easy, wondered Amu in admiration and slight embarrassment at her own awkwardness. Suzie assured her and the equally struggling Berkeley that it was quite normal; she had struggled at first too. The girls all giggled, having fun in this sweet moment together.

And then he appeared at the front of the classroom. His entrance had been silent, so few students noticed amidst the hubbub, and Amu might not have either if the corner of her eye had not been positioned just so at just the right moment. Tall, lanky frame clad in baggy gray and black plaid slacks, draped over an incredibly scuffed pair of black boots. A wrinkled and faded black button-up shirt, untucked, sleeves rolled up, top button undone to expose a bulky silver cross. Long indigo hair, only partially captured by the loose ponytail at the back, the rest falling into his deep blue eyes, framed by severe-looking black-rimmed reading glasses that actually dressed up the rest of his rumpled outfit. Those piercing midnight blue eyes, open wide in a shock that mirrored Amu’s own, boring into her soul to call back unanswered questions she had abandoned long ago.

Amu almost dropped her violin as he made his way to her, ignoring other students’ gossiping and giggling, the fiddling with instruments, and other reminders of the present world, suddenly far too mundane to contain this moment. He stopped a foot in front of her, leaning over her wide-eyed, upturned face, searching it as if he had left some sort of truth there long ago. Berkeley looked from one to the other with a slightly raised eyebrow, the only giveaway that her curiosity was anything more than mild.

Suzie was the one to break the silence with a soft greeting: “Um, excuse me, sir, are you the substitute instructor for this class?” He finally removed his intense gaze from flushed, trembling Amu to glance at her. When he said nothing, she continued “…I’m Suzie Chen of Mrs. Mansfield’s class, and these are my friends Amu Hinamori and Berkeley Walker, here to receive promotional lessons today. Thank you for taking over the class on such a hectic day, and if you need any help during class, please feel free to call on me.” He stared at her for a few seconds, his true attention still obviously on Amu.

“Yo, Amu,” he said, recovering some of his old confidence, but not the hint of teasing his voice had always carried. No, this was more reserved and polite, even despite the familiar language. Then, turning to Suzue, “thank you, Miss Suzie. I gladly accept your care.

He then strode back to the front to call class to order. “Attention, everyone. Class will now begin. I will start with roll call, first the studio members and then the promotional visitors. Listen up for your name.” Seeing the looks off confusion, he added, “oh yeah, Mrs. Mansfield took an early maternity leave, so for the next two months, starting today, you will be in my care. I have performed on stages in Japan, Europe, Australia, and the United States, both as a soloist and as a member of an orchestra. I have a recorded solo album and appear in six orchestral albums. I am currently working on my second solo album and collaborating with the Indie rock band Stray-t and Narrow, Stray-t spelled S-t-r-a-y-hyphen-t. We will be opening for the world-famous Utau Hoshina this weekend at the Regency Ballroom in San Francisco. Is there anyone who does not believe I possess the qualifications needed to lead this class?” At the end his voice took on an icy edge, as if daring anyone to speak out against him. When no one did, he continued: “My name is Ikuto Tsukiyomi, you can call me by first or last name. I’m here to teach you music, not some stuffy outdated etiquette. You want that, go to finishing school.” Then, locking his fierce gaze on Amu, concluded, “Let’s get started.”

Amu, trembling, struggled even more than before to position her instrument. Her mind was all at once racing at light speed and standing dead still. Her heart was pounding against her chest, and her blood coursed in her ears, dizzying her. How can he be all the way here, after all this time? What do I say? What do I do? How do I act? Gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! Suzie chuckled nervously, probably uncomfortable with the coarse character of her new instructor, and confused about the way he was treating her frazzled friend. Berkeley’s stare rested on the strange man as she nonchalantly whispered under her breath, “So that’s Ikuto, huh? Well, this ought to be interesting….”

#anime #manga #fanfiction #shugo chara #amuto #amu x ikuto #amu hinamori #ikuto tsukiyomi #nagihiko is gay af #tadase is a dick #sorry not sorry

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savvylark · 6 years

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A College AU Everlark drabble for @katnissdoesnotfollowback based in this promptshe wanted Everlark-ed. @lynamloveseverlark and @xerxia31 were an extra pair of eyes and listening ear.

Part 2

My heart is pounding out of my chest. This isn't how it was supposed to go.

It wasn't supposed to feel like this. Buried in his strong arms as he pulls her closer. We watch the sun slowly lower and set the field ablaze in deep oranges and reds. He smells so good, a fresh and sweet smell mixed with an herbal and musky manly scent that bring to remind feelings of strength and safety.

I look up to gaze into his deep blue eyes. So unlike his brother's, uniquely dark with a pointillism of green on the center.

Here I am spouting painting techniques I've learned, even in my inner dialogue he's made such an impression.

Purely acting on an urge to express my feelings in this moment, I stretch my neck forward to capture his perfect plush lips.

Kisses aren't supposed to be this sweet yet awaken my whole body at the same time, but of course, this is what Peeta Mellark does to me. With his kindness, his laugh, the twinkle in his eyes, his very nature.

I'm taken under a tidal wave of emotions by this man with strong arms and ocean blue eyes. I'm in too deep and I don't think I want to resurface.

XXXXX

I take another sip of my beer and stare down my friend and crush, Rye Mellark. His icy blue eyes twinkle. He gives me a playful wink and continues ribbing my best friend Gale over some team rivalry.

I try not to blush but I can't stop thinking about the way Rye looks at me.

Like I'm the only girl in the room.

But he won't admit it to anyone.

We've been playing this game, and doing this dance for too long. I like him, he likes me. We make each other laugh until our sides hurt.

For being a terrible flirt, regardless of all the hints I've given, Rye won't make a move.

I'm legitimately bad at flirting. I replay in my mind a few things Madge has taught me. Touch your hair, bite your lip, make eye contact, then look away, touch his shoulder, laugh when he's trying to be funny, whisper in his ear. If he sees that you're interested and less guarded it might help.

I smooth down my more feminine attire, take a deep breath and make a move.

“Hey stranger.” I greet Rye, and attempt to touch him playfully but I end up petting his forearm, pull my hand away and pretend that wasn't weird.

Make conversation, I tell myself.

I stumble over my words and end up saying something stupid about how pale he is and how tan he gets in the summer.

Gale looks at me with amusement at how terribly this is going.

“Are you okay?” Is there something in your hair? Here, I can help you.” Rye asks as he reaches for where I am continually rubbing my hand on my hair. Clearly not coming off very flirty.

I don't know what to think when I realize probably a third of the people here at Gale’s party are aware of my intentions. It's even more embarrassing that I'm failing.

I try biting my lip and give a sweet look but I'm already so embarrassed. I look away and take a sip of my beer just as Rye whispers in my ear “You look really pretty Katniss.”

I suck in a breath and inhale my drink. Sputtering and coughing, which draws everyone's concern.

Great, now I have everyone's attention.

Rye pats me on the back in an attempt to help, but I retreat to the bathroom.

Two hours into the evening no progress has been made in my mission of getting Rye to admit he likes me as much as I like him.

I found Rye chatting up a busty blonde girl that I've seen around campus. I'm not one for competition.

I stomp off into the kitchen for another drink.

I find Peeta, Rye’s younger who I vaguely remember is in a few of my freshman requirement classes. We officially met a few years earlier at one of Rye or Gale’s parties.

Peeta and I haven't really talked… Well ever. He was always the golden boy type and had plenty of attention from girls. While I'm a little darker and grittier and kind of a guy's girl.

Not the sweet doe-eyed kind of girl golden boys want.

But Rye on the other hand…

“Hey! How's your night going?” I asked Rye’s brother.

“Good. School year is over. I won a few rounds of beer pong. Are you happy to have the whole summer break ahead of you?” He asks.

I bob my head and take another swig of beer. It's not easier coming home, just working a lot of hours and playing Taxi to my almost 16 year old sister. But normal college kids are relieved so I play along.

I nod and play with my hair as I rattle off a few summer plans, hiking, camping, the usual shenanigans with Rye and Gale while trying to stay out of trouble, biting my lip to hold in my laugh.

“And your birthday is coming up isn't it?” he asks.

“How did you--” I ask, but he cuts me off.

“I decorate the cakes, you know?” He smirks.

We continue to talk in the kitchen long after we've refilled our drinks. Rye’s brother surprises me. He’s clever, funny and charming, I knew that. It's his self deprecating humor, his shy smiles and the way he says my name that makes me more at ease.

My cheeks hurt from laughing and I smack his arm playfully when he teases me.

I didn't realize how lost in conversation I've been until Rye pops in, “There you are! Oh, Silver-eyes with my silver-tongue brother I see.” He tries to say in a playful tone, but it comes off a little jealous.

I whisper in Peeta's ear “I think you're brother's jealous.”

I smile as our eyes meet, his deep blue ones widen, try to hold in a laugh, but we've been laughing so much that it's just under the surface.

Rye makes a competitive face at his brother, like a basketball player stealing the ball from a rival, and puts an almost possessive arm around me.

“We have a game to play, and I need my favorite partner.” Rye explains as he leads me away from his brother.

I smile back at Peeta and shrug my shoulders.

Peeta laughs and shakes his head back at me.

Talking to Peeta made Rye jealous.

That's when I formulate my plan, if I date Peeta, casually, so not to hurt anyone, I can get Rye to admit his crush on me and act on his feelings. I have the entire summer break, if things go awry we’ll be back at college in the fall and can easily avoid each other and any awkwardness.

Xxxx

I approach Peeta at the bakery, he's working up front and Rye's shift doesn't start until later. Not that I know my crush’s work schedule or anything, Rye just told me when he would be in.

I order my birthday cake and suggest that Peeta comes the party Gale is throwing for me on the beach Friday. It's May, so it's a little cold to go swimming, but perfect for a bonfire in the sand.

I bite my lip in thought. Then meet Peeta's blue eyes. “Um, maybe we could spend some time together?” I suggest, then look down and fiddle with my receipt.

When I look back up Peeta smirks. I think he's on to my plan, if anyone knows Rye is trying to hide his feelings for me it's his own brother. Peeta's not really one to be tied down to one particular girl so, I don't really feel like I would be toying with him if we keep things casual. I think he's up for a bit if fun this summer.

He gives me an amused look, “Sure.”

We swap numbers and make plans to check out the new Avengers movie next week.

“I don't think I've ever seen a superhero or action movie with a girl before!” Peeta tells me when I suggested Infinity War.

“Well, you're not hanging out with the right girls.” I answer back with tint of my head and smile.

“I guess not.” Peeta hold my gaze of a full 30 seconds, his eyes seem to dance. He shakes his head and laughs.

“See you tomorrow at the beach?” I confirm, he has to be there for this to start out the way I'm hoping.

“I'll be there alright.” he nods and flashes that perfect smile that makes most girls weak in the knees. Not me. I mean maybe a little but not really.

It's just a family trait, I tell myself.

#more drawn out than i planned #everlark #college au #part 1 #crush it #savvylark writes

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travelingthroughtimejjs · 3 years

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Sports

Sports have always been an extremely important aspect of my life. I played hockey when I was 5 but quit after the season because I hated to sweat lol. In my younger days I played soccer, from the time I was 4 until grade 8. Grade 6 was when I really started to expand into a variety of activities. In grade 5 I played in a touch football league with kids grade 5-8 but I wasn’t that good.

In 6th grade I started playing football, hockey, basketball and doing track and field. My friends were all playing football with the River Riders so after a couple of games I decided to join. I was a wide receiver who didn’t do much at the time. I had one 40 yard touchdown that season off an end around sweep. I knew I was fast so it wasn’t surprising but I was raw. At the end of the season I asked the coach if I could play runningback the next season so I could be more involved, he laughed and said we’ll see.

My first year back in hockey was okay. I was also really raw in this but I was one of the better kids on the team just due to my speed. All the kids on the team wanted me to be captain after I gave a big speech when everyone was pissed in North Battleford but we didn’t ever end up giving out a C.

I was good at basketball again because I was fast but I got so many stupid fouls because I was over aggressive. I won the team MVP in grade 7 and played the same style being one of the better players in grade 8.

Track and field was the same old thing every year. I was just simply faster than everyone in elementary school. Everyone was always telling me that so and so was really fast and that I might not win against them, but that wasn’t the case. I never lost once, I never even had a close race. Grade’s 6-8 I won the city championship for every single sprinting event, and also got track and field MVP every year.

Grade 7 football changed my life. I had done all my growing which meant I was 5′7″ absolutely dominating the football field. I put up 2 197 yards in just 8 games, an average of 275 yards per game. Along with that I scored 36 touchdowns if you count the meaningless playoff game we played, an average of 4 per game. In that last playoff game we were down by 5 with 1 play remaining and 2 yards to go, the play broke down completely and I ran to the left with basically the whole other team standing in front of me, so I sprinted to the right as fast as I could and dove into the corner of the end zone. We won the game, and so many teachers the next day came up to me and said they heard what had happened on the radio. I won team MVP of course.

Grade 7 hockey was okay. i was getting better but due to my birthday I was forced to play in a grade 8/9 league. This didn’t really matter. I led the team in scoring.

I started snowboarding when I was 5 and got really into it in 5th grade when I joined a team of riders that was taught by the owner of Propaganda. In 7th grade I went to the mountains for the first time with tyson. In 11th grade I went back with Short. In 12th grade Josh asked me if i wanted to go but I didn’t think I could afford it because of S-Trip and university in the fall.

Grade 8 football was finally my time to prove myself. Playing against kids older than me it was a question whether or not I would get to start. Those questions were silenced pretty fast as I continued to dominate. We had a really good team and made the top bowl for playoffs. I scored 19 touchdowns in our 8 games and again won team MVP. I also met Adam on this team and we turned into really great friends throughout the years. This was the first time i got to be a team captain for anything, I was the only grade 8 to get to be one.

Grade 8 hockey was fun. I played on a travelling team in a higher league that would go on to dominate. First we won the lloydminster tournament before qualifying for the provincial tournament and ultimately crushing Regina in the provincial championship to be the champions. I had a lot of cool friends on this tea, including Ryan, who again I became great friends with and Short. I didn’t get too much playing time on this team but I gave it my all when I was out there and scored a decent amount of goals.

After grade 8 I made the U16 North Sask football team. We travelled to Winnipeg to play against the other provinces, I didn’t get much playing time though.

I became really into biking in 6th grade as well but I didn’t really keep up with it into high school.

Grade 9 football was really tough. Our team was terrible was didn’t even have 24 players most games, meaning someone had to play all game. We lost every single game except for one. I scored 11 touchdowns in 8 games, which was pretty disappointing for me. I cried with frustration more than once. At the end of the season I once again got the team MVP.

In grade 9 I made the Junior A basketball team, it was pretty fun because we got to travel around for tournaments. I was in track and field too but once I realized I wasn’t the fastest person anymore I lost interest. I went to provincials and got 9th place.

In grade 9 I played high school spring football with mostly grade 10s and 11s. I tried hard and did alright all season. At the end of the season Mr. Germs came up to me and told me he wanted me to be the starting running back of the senior team the next year.

10th grade football was alright. I played with an amazing QB named Bray, but he was extremely selfish and cared more for the glory. I was one of two grade 10′s to be on the senior football team, we were both starters. I captured the teams Rookie of the Year after putting up 628 yards and 3 touchdowns in 7 games. This season I had a huge performance in front of the whole city in the Canadian Tire Bowl against Carlton, I had 149 yards rushing and a touchdown in a 14-2 win. I should’ve had the other touchdown as well but Bray for some reason kept the ball on the 1 when he was supposed to hand it off.

In grade 10 I was on the curling team which was actually pretty fun. I again made it to provincials for track but didn’t really care about it, I was just going for the weekend of fun. Grade 11 track and field was the exact same thing, I qualified for provincial’s but I knew i wasn’t going to win so I just went for fun. In grade 12 I qualified once again but i didn’t end up going because I wasn’t too sure if I could afford it. I made the senior A basketball team in grade 10 but I ended up quitting the team because I wanted to work more so I could buy myself a vehicle.

I played spring football after grade 10 as well but it was kind of a waste of time, nobody could stop me, every time I touched the ball I scored. It was normal for me to get 8 touchdowns in a game.

Grade 11 football season was fun. Before our first game in Regina I was unexpectedly named team captain. I didn’t see it coming at all, I didn’t even think I was a candidate but I guess all the work I put in and the friendships I was making were evident to everyone else. I finished the season with over 800 yards and 10 touchdowns. Our team ended up losing in the Div 2 championship game. I thought I was bound to win the MVP award but I was super frustrated when the award ended up going to one of the offensive lineman on the team, I did end up winning the team leadership award.

Grade 11 I once again made the Senior A basketball team, I had bought myself a car the year before so I was good to go to play basketball 6 days a week and work on the 7th. I didn’t get that much playing time this year but I didn’t care we were dominating everyone we played against, only ended up losing two games all year. One in overtime in the GIT final and then a 5 point loss in the provincial final. I was always just happy to be there and got super hyped on the bench being whacky and dancing and cheering on the team. For my efforts I was given the spirit award at the end of the season awards.

In grade 11 I chose to once again return to playing hockey for one last year. I played in the North Valley league which meant a lot of travelling to small towns around Prince Albert. I was surprisingly really good this year, although I hadn’t played in so long, I was better than I had ever been before. I was also named an assistant captain on this team, I would’ve been captain had Connor Bear not been on the team but he was definitely deserving of the honour. After working my ass off all season I was awarded with the only trophy that they give out in the North Valley league, not quite a league MVP but given to someone who displays love for the game, is determined to succeed, is focussed and fearless and shows team leadership. It was really cool to be honoured for how hard I worked especially because it was the only award given out in the whole league and there were a lot of people worthy of winning it.

I didn’t want to play spring football in grade 11 because of how easy it was in grade 10 and I told the coaches that. So they ended up dividing the league in two based on skill level, the better kids played in one league while the worse ones played in another. This made it a lot more fun for me.

Grade 12 football was great. I was once again team captain and had some insane games. I finished the year just under 1000 yards (400 more than the second place person) and a league leading 10 touchdowns. The team got our revenge in the division 2 championship game, capping off a great career.

Throughout grade 12 I was also driving down to Regina to practice with the Regina Thunder every second week. I was the first player invited to spring camp and had made the team at the very first practice, but I didn’t want to move to Regina and I knew that so it was really a waste of everyone’s time. Mr. Hundeby also got me a tryout with the University of Saskatchewan but I had given up on football already and just wanted to focus on school. Any other year I probably would’ve been on the U of S team but our graduation year they were switching head coaches after 40 years, so they only accepted 13 new players instead of the usual 40-50 they have every other year.

Grade 12 basketball we were pretty above average. A big step down from the prior year but we consistently got third place at every tournament. To my surprise I also got to be a team captain on this team, even though I really wasn't that good.

Throughout university I participated in numerous recreational sports. In first year I played rec football, our team wasn’t too bad and I made some big plays once again. Second and third year I played rec hockey in the competitive league, a lot of former WHL and AAA guys play in this league so I’m typically one of the worst players but I still have fun. In third year I also played rec basketball which was pretty fun. I’ve been playing flag football in the league in Prince Albert for 3rd and 4th year which I just absolutely dominate week in and week out.

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evenstevensranked · 7 years

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#31: Season 1, Episode 2 - “Stevens Genes”

Louis makes the track team! Not only that, he’s poised to be the new star runner! The only problem is that Louis runs as slow as a sloth. Sound confusing? Well, it’s all part of Larry Beale’s plan to set him up for failure and humiliation.

It’s only the second episode of the entire series and things are already starting to pick up amazingly. This episode is packed with memorable and quotable lines, many of which I still use to this day. This one continues with the theme established from day one: Louis trying to discover something he’s good at. I love this theme. It makes for some awesome character growth and it works really well here!

It opens with Coach Tugnut rallying up the boys in gym class, announcing that there’s an open spot on the track team. This of course, somehow segues into him worshiping Donnie Stevens and ranting about how much of a legend he is and what an asset he once was to the track team. Well, to every team actually. If Ren is the academic overachiever, Donnie is the athletic overachiever. Tugnut yells at the class army style to turn right and bow their heads. We then get a shot of this giant mural dedicated to Donnie excelling at every sport ever with patriotic music playing in the background. It’s incredible. It also includes one of the greatest unspoken quotes ever:

Donnie needs to give a TED Talk. Stat.

While this Donnie praise is happening, they make a point to show Larry Beale -- who I’m assuming is Coach Tugnut’s assistant since he’s not in Grade 7, looking visibly disgusted. He mumbles “Donnie Stevens is over. It’s my turn now” to himself. Oh, boy.

They head out to the track to do some timed sprints. Of course, Larry is the one with the stopwatch. Larry’s sort of taunting all the kids trying to motivate them to run faster. When it’s Louis’ turn we get a line that always gets a laugh out of me:

The thought of Louis “running” slow enough to take days to reach point B is great. Gotta love his self-awareness.

To everyone’s surprise, Louis is extremely fast. Even faster than Donnie’s best time. Could this be Louis’ “thing” he’s good at?! Don’t get your hopes up. Larry purposely clocked his time in at 18.25 seconds... which is probably a good 8-10 seconds before Louis actually finished lol. Tugnut is shocked and gives Louis the vacant spot on the team immediately.

Tugnut is totally kissing Louis’ butt now because he thinks he’s carrying on the Stevens Dynasty. Louis is seriously amazed that he’s so fast!! “I always knew you had it in you!!” Tugnut tells him. And then we get yet another line I love:

Legendary save, Tugnut. Legendary save. I literally use this quote whenever the opportunity arises.

Louis starts hanging out with Donnie more to get some sports advice. Donnie suggests the most ridiculous things like putting mousse in your hair for aerodynamic-ness and shaving your legs to run like the wind. Which results in a line you’ve undoubtedly heard: “Donnie, I’m running track -- not modeling pantyhose.”

We see that Ren has been assigned to cover sports for the school newspaper. She discovers that Louis made the track team, and is immediately suspicious. I’d be too, tbh. I mean, this is the same kid who gets cramped up and winded just from tying his shoes. Louis is pretty excited about this new-found talent, though. He’s finally starting to feel like a true member of the Stevens family. Naturally, this goes to his head and he’s already dreaming of becoming a multimillionaire Olympic athlete:

Do athletes just stand in the middle of a packed arena and get handed giant checks for 40 mil? Like... is that a thing? Not to mention, the check is from “Hoop Stars” and clearly shows a basketball player logo. Okay.

Around this point, we start to see Louis succumbing to peer pressure a bit. This happens a few more times throughout the series. Yet another symptom of desperately wanting to fit into his family. He ditches Tawny and Twitty at lunch to hang out with Larry and the popular jocks.

Larry is so fake. Louis is so pure. I’m so sad.

Ren stops by to get a quote from Louis about the big meet against Rockport and he gives the most awkwardly ridiculous and overdramatic statement. That patriotic music we heard earlier kicks in again. It’s great. The cherry on top is when he mispronounces Rockport “Rock-a-por.”

Later that day before practice, Louis takes Donnie’s mousse advice a little too far:

You’ve probably seen gifs from this scene. (Especially the gif version of the photo I chose for the cover picture.)

He shows up to practice feelin’ all suave with his moussed-to-death hair. There’s a “Staying Alive” knock-off playing as he walks towards the track. I actually love that this show basically never got the rights to use the legitimate songs. It sort of makes everything funnier, imo. That, and Disney Channel is cheap apparently and don’t permanently pay for the rights to popular songs. Dunno if I mentioned this before, but Lizzie McGuire was pretty much the channel’s most popular show and was super trendy/caught up in Early 00′s pop culture. Therefore, that show used SO MANY official songs. 16 years later, almost all of those songs are missing in the reruns and replaced with terrible stock music. An iconic scene like the “Us Against The World” music video is not nearly as impactful or nostalgic because they’re dancing to generic techno music now. It SUCKS. So, thank god Even Stevens never used any. Their stock music sort of works subconsciously. The song used here is totally not “Staying Alive” -- but it’s juuust close enough that it triggers your brain and you remember it as “Staying Alive.” Kinda cool.

Side note: It’s so difficult to not quote almost every line of this episode. There are so many good ones, I have to keep stopping myself from typing out a freaking transcript.

Anyway, Ren observes Louis and Larry practicing and it’s crystal clear that Larry is holding back for whatever reason.

Be a little less obvious, Larry. Also, sorry for all the gifs. I can’t help myself.

Ren puts the pieces together and figures out what Larry is up to. His plan is to set Louis up to fail big time at the meet. That way when he beats Louis, he’ll be able to gloat about beating “the fastest Stevens of all!” Makes sense. Ren tries telling Louis, but of course, he doesn’t believe her........ WE GO THROUGH THIS AGAIN ONE EPISODE LATER IN WHAT’LL IDOL DO, JUST REVERSED. God. Siblings not believing each other drives me insaaaane. I understand where Louis’ unwillingness to believe is coming from though. He insists that Larry is Ren’s enemy, not his, and he’s just so excited to finally have something to be good at. It breaks my heart.

Ren later apologizes and tells Louis that she’s proud of him. Louis rants again about everyone in the family having their “thing” and now that he’s found his he’s not gonna let anyone take it away. But, Ren tells him “You HAVE your thing. You’re... funny.” *Cue the emotional piano. Literally.* You can tell those words really mean a lot to him.

We’ve made it to the big track meet. Coach Tugnut gives the guys possibly the greatest motivational words ever: “Remember, it’s not whether you win or lose -- as long as you come in first.” Perfect. There’s also a great bit here where Donnie is stretching Louis’ leg and asks him when the last time he stretched was. Louis is clearly in pain and says “I don’t have a schedule with me right now... but if I were to guess..... uhh.... NEVER?!” - This is so me. I’ve also used that quote before.

We learn that Louis’ main rival is some dude Trevor Dunn. As the runners take off, both Trevor and Larry dramatically fall halfway to the finish line. Victory is within Louis’ reach... If he just keeps running, he’ll totally win! But what does he do?! He runs over to help them instead. The sucky thing is, Larry faked his injury and pulls Louis to the ground like “lol got ya” and wins the race. Louis stays behind and comforts Trevor, who has an actual sprained ankle. What a sweetheart. Louis is cracking jokes (”Talk about the agony of da-feet. Please, no standing ovations.”) and making Trevor laugh pretty hard. So, Trevor casually says “You’re funny.” :’) This time it means so much more coming from someone who’s not his sister.

Even though Larry won, the entire crowd is cheering “LOUIS, LOUIS!” for his good deed. Larry is fuming.

The final scene is a sweet mirror talk. I think I’ve mentioned enough how much I love and miss these. This one is a favorite of mine:

"The best thing that happened to me today? A kid called me funny. And as much as I like being on the track team and hanging out with my brother... I like being funny more."

This is so heartwarming. Because it’s obvious that comedy is truly his "thing." It’s nice to see him accept that. (Even though he still struggles later on.) This is another parallel with Shia, I think. He has suuuch a natural gift for comedy. I want him to embrace it more these days!!! *sigh* Plz god.

Louis also ends up getting Student of the Month and his picture is adorable lol

I really, really like this episode.

I feel like most people remember this one pretty well. If you watched Disney Channel during Even Stevens’ original run, then you most definitely remember a slew of quotes. Its quotability is the main reason I’ve ranked this towards the higher end of the list. I also have a soft spot for this episode in general and there’s some nice character development as well.

Like I’ve mentioned before, Disney hammers the first few episodes of a show into the freaking ground. I swear I’ve seen the same few episodes of Andi Mack and Raven’s Home on TV every single day since they premiered. That’s basically what they did with Even Stevens, too. It’s part of what makes Season 1 particularly memorable at times. There really isn’t much that I dislike about this one. Like most S1 episodes, it’s just a little slower. Since it’s super early in the series, the overall plot feels very Late 90′s Disney Channel. Similar to All About Yvette. (I feel like I bring that episode up constantly lol) There’s just a certain pure, old school, generic quality to it that simply cannot be accurately explained and somehow makes me feel a little neutral about it.

That being said, this is only EPISODE 2!!!! Considering that, it’s top-notch honestly. Right out the gate, we’re getting to see more sides to Louis Stevens. Naïve, arrogant/head in the clouds, caring, funny. And of course, we ultimately see what a good kid at heart he is. And boy, do I love to see that. :D

Thanks fo’ readin.

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kitgilmore · 7 years

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FIVE // KILL ME NOW.

Friday night dinners were now apart of their lives, it was a requirement Kit's and Rory's mother Lorelai had agreed too when their grandparents agreed to pay the girl's prep school tuition. Before this arrangement, the twins only saw their grandparents on holidays, Christmas, Easter, Kit wouldn't admit this out loud for fear of her Mother's sarcastic response but she liked seeing their grandparents more.

"Dinner was lovely, Emily." Their grandfather said from the head of the table. Their grandparent's house was bigger and but it wasn't one of those mega mansions you see on MTV. It was filled with antiques their grandmother had found from all over the world, with rich fabrics and fine china. Their house was a perfect reflexion of both Richard and Emily, It was hard for Kit to imagine her eccentric mother growing up in this house. Everything had a place but her mother could never find a place to fit.

"Mira does make a perfect cassoulet." Emily Gilmore smiled proudly.

"Who's Mira?" Kit asked, placing her knife and folk together.

"Our cook."

"I thought the cook was Heidi." Their mother interjects.

"Oh, no, we let Heidi go months ago. She had a problem closing things - the door, the refrigerator"—

"The liquor bottle." Both girls laughed at their grandfather's snide remark.

"Then it was Trina, then Sophia." Emily continued.

"Oh, I liked Sophia."

"You did not."

"I didn't?"

"She was the one who sang."

"That's right - terrible woman." watching their grandparents back and father were rather funny to both girls if it was already clear they were related just listening to them all talk would be proof enough.

"And after Sophia we had Anton."

"That's right. Anton was the one that I liked."

"I'm sorry, Dad, how do you mix up Anton and Sophia?" Their mother asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, one is a man and one is a woman." The twins exchanged look before sniggering to themselves.

"And your point being?"

"That one is a man and one is a woman."

"I have a lot to do in a day, Lorelai, I don't have time to keep up with a multitude of people that your mother employs."

"But one is a man and one is a woman." their mother said again unable to understand his mistake, Just then the cook in question brought out dessert.

"The dinner was so wonderful, Mira," Lorelai said

"It's Sarah." The cook replied.

"Oh, I'm sorry." with that she left.

"Mom! Her name is Sarah!"

"I thought she said Mira." she said, her eyebrows raising in that Gilmore way.

"Grandma" Kit scolded.

"Hey, Grandma,..." Rory started, changing the subject. "..these plates are really pretty."

"Thank you, Rory...They were your great-grandmother's."

"Lorelai the first," Richard stated.

"I thought Mom was the first," Rory asked.

"Not in the name."

"No, but in so many other things I was a regular trailblazer." Kit laughed, at her mother's inappropriate jokes.

"...Just finishing your thought, Mom."

"Lorelai the first is my mother. She's an extremely accomplished equestrian, a distinguished patron of the arts, and she's also world-famous for her masquerade balls. She's quite a woman, my mother."

"Sound like my kind of woman," Kit told her grandfather, he spoke about his mother with such love, painted her with such grace, Kit wondered if that's where she got her musical talent from. Who doesn't love a masquerade ball, Attend masquerade ball? New bucket list item.

"Yes, she was," Emily said without the devotion her husband had.

"Mira, come cut the cake please." she called out to the kitchen.

"Yes, and why don't you bring Sarah out here with you?" Their mother called after her, Kit just smiled into her hands, her grandmother tight-lipped.

"So, Lorelai, how are things at that charming little inn of yours?" Emily asked as they all enjoyed their dessert, a white chocolate gateau Kit thought was heavenly.

"Mm - they're still charming and little. We're just crossing our fingers it doesn't assert itself and become rude and large."

"Mom's having a huge wedding there this week." Kit said praising her mother, before taking another bite

"Really?"

"Yeah, actually there are people coming from all over the country," Lorelai said

"Well, isn't that nice?"

"Yeah." They seemed to be smiling at one another but all that stopped when Emily said

"So girls, how's Chilton?

"OK, done with me now." Kit smiled at her mother.

"I'm sorry, was there more to the story?" Emily asked her daughter.

"Uh, the girls have to pick a team sport to play."

"It's a requirement," Rory told her sweetly

"Physical fitness is as important as intellectual fitness. So says Plato and so say I." Their grandfather told the twins.

"Expect if you play with a bunch of competitive teenagers than it's a potential career ender for a cellist." she said Indicting to her fingers.

"What sport are you going to pick?"

"I'm not sure. I'm not really the athletic type." Rory told them

"I told her she should go out for the debating team," Lorelai told them, taking a bite of the cake.

"It's not a sport."

"It is the way the Gilmore's play". their mother commented.

"So, what are your choices?"

"God, there's like a thousand of them: basketball, lacrosse, track" Rory started to list.

"Swimming, Golf, that pretty safe right, for your hands". Kit asked, gesturing to her hands

"Golf?"

"Yeah."

"Well, your grandfather is a golf player."

"Oops." their mother said.

"He plays every week at the club. He could teach you to play like a pro." Emily continued.

"Emily." Their grandfather, said his face taught, he did not want to teach his granddaughters to play golf, that was clear to everyone but their grandmother.

"Why, he could take you there on Sunday. It's perfect."

"It's not something you can teach in an afternoon," Richard said. The twins exchanged a look with their mother.

"That's OK. They can pick something else." Their mother tried to defuse this situation.

"Why should they pick something else? They need to learn a sport and Richard can teach them a sport." Turing to the girls she said.

"You can use your mother's old golf clubs. They're upstairs gathering dust along with the rest of her potential."

"OK, Mom, can I maybe talk to you for a minute?"

"We're having dessert."

"I know but I'd like to talk to you fast before the sugar sets in and makes me crazy."

"You are the oddest person." she responded, leaving the table.

"Too easy."

The rest of dinner went on without a hitch, once the eldest female Gilmores had decided the twins plans for that weekend, the had more dessert and coffee.

"Oh, man, did you get blindsided? I'm so sorry." Their mother told them once they were another side of the door, the late September air, whispering against her bare legs as she pulled her wool coat tighter.

"That's OK," Rory told her.

"I tried to stop it, I swear."

"I know. Maybe it won't be that bad." Kit interjected, the look of her mother say, was both questioning and amused.

"Maybe it won't."

"Maybe we'll like it," Rory added.

"Maybe you will."

"Maybe you could come with us." Kit couldn't help but laugh at her sister request.

"Oh, is there a "you're crazy" team? 'Cause I think they'd make you co-captains." She told them.

"Please?"

"Girls I love you. I would take a bullet for you. But I'd rather stick something sharp in my ear than go to the club with you."

"Fine."

"I'd rather slide down a banister of razor blades and land in a pool of alcohol than go to the club with you."

"We got it" Kit told her.

"Don't stop me, I'm on a roll. I'd rather eat my own hand than go to the club with you. Ooh, I'd rather get my face surgically altered to look like that lunatic rich lady with the lion head than going to the club with you." Their mother struggled out, both girls were just looking at their mother's ridiculous annotates. Kit rolled her eyes before she chuckled.

"Would you like me to drive so you can continue your diatribe?"

"Would ya? Thanks." Tossing Kit the keys, they made their way to the jeep.

"I'd rather cut off my head and use it as a punch bowl than go to the club with you." Rory just shook her head.

The twins drove their mother's jeep to their grandparent's house, they were slightly late because Kit was complaining about having to wear pants, she was strictly a skirt and tights kind of girl, on very rare occasions she wore jeans but these beige pants she was wearing now she did not like, maybe if it was warming she could wear shorts. Pulling on the sleeves of her yellow shirt she sighed while Rory knocked on the door.

"Richard, so help me God, you will be sweet to these girls and make this a memorable day for them. This is the first time we've gotten to show our granddaughters off at the club and it means a great deal to my happiness - and yours - that this day goes well. Are we clear?"

They heard before their grandmother opened the door.

"Girls Hello."

"Sorry, we're late." Kit said, moving the conversation into the foyer where their grandfather messing around with his golf clubs, he seemed as uncomfortable as the twins with this forced activities.

"Nonsense. You're right on time."

"Hi, Grandpa." Rory smiled.

"Girl, nice to see you."

"This is a perfect day for golfing, isn't it Richard?" Kit smiled at her grandfather, more and more she was finding herself unable to be annoyed by her grandparents.

"It was cooler at 8." he mumbled.

"Our we dressed OK?" Kit asked, looking at the two sets of golf clubs her grandmother had provided them, she was having a hard time picturing her mother playing golf, or any sport that wasn't an eating contest.

"We didn't have any of those short pant things." Rory finished. Emily looked them up and down, and smiled, It wasn't a common assurance to see the twins dressed a like, their mother was strictly against cute matching outfits. Except for that one Halloween when she dressed as the twins from the shining but that wasn't cute, it terrified everyone, the ten-year-olds thought.

"Well, actually there is something missing. Oh, wait a minute..." pulling two, matching yellow, red and green hat from an obviously new shopping bag. She put the hat on Rory's head, handing Kit her's who in turn put it on before her grandmother adjusted it. She smiled as she caught her eye.

"Here you go. Now you look just like Tiger Woods."

"Wow, that's some hat," Rory said looking the mirror.

"OK, off you go, you three. Have a wonderful time." The twins picked up their clubs, Rory struggling with the weight, while Kit looped them into her shoulder.

"We will."

"You bet." they heard their grandfather said, as they made their way to his car.

"Is it hard to become a member here?" Kit asked, walking through one of the many greens that the club had to offer. Kit thought it was strange to have three men following them around, carrying their golf clubs but after a while, she seemed to forget they were they. Now she definitely needed a car or a golf caddy.

"Everyone has to go through a thorough screening process." he told them, as they walked on either side of him.

"Kind of like the FBI?" Rory asked.

"We're much more thorough than that." He told them.

"Wow."

"Yes. Did you know the merger of Farscape and D.S.S." He asked them, Kit didn't have any clue who or what that was but Rory's ears perked up as she said.

"Really."

"International finance will never be the same and all because of a lost golfing bet"

"That's crazy."

"Well that's high finance." he said, as they reached their first hole.

"Well, here we are. Now, what do you know about golf?" Kit thought about it, what did she know about golf, apart from Tiger Woods and Birdy or how much she enjoying wearing one white glove. Her eyebrows contorted as Rory said.

"That it's a good walk spoiled?" Their grandfather signed, before pulling a club from his bag.

"Well, your driver is the most powerful club in your bag, and as such, it can be your most valuable asset or your greatest liability.

"To wield it properly requires a precise combination of confidence and humility." He said passing the club to Rory.

"Confidence and humility. Got it."

"There you are. That's a pretty good natural grip."

"Now, line the toe of your left foot up with the ball. That's right." he demonstrated.

"Now, drop this shoulder a little bit. Now, keeping your left arm firm, draw the club back, swing it cleanly through the ball."

"I'm betting that was wrong," Rory said after cutting up the green with her swing.

"There are no rights and wrongs to the learning process." Kit tried not to giggle ."Try that again.

"I'm betting that was wrong." Kit said as she did the same thing. Richard took the clubs of Rory and handed it to Kit.

The three of them played a few more holes before, the twins even managed to hit the ball, it didn't go very far but it was a start.

"I can't believe I hit the ball!" Rory exclaimed.

"Well, it was quite impressive."

"It landed in the water." Kit said defeated.

"Yes, but the splash was quite impressive."

"This place is so beautiful. I could see just coming here to think or read." Rory started.

"But that probably defeats the purpose of the holes with the flag thing." Kit finished, They really were having a nice time with their grandfather, the conversation hit a lull every now and then but the three of them found things to talk about, it mostly involved the girls asking him questions about golf but it flowed nicely.

"There is something rather serene about walking around here." he told them, taking in the tranquil views.

"Do you come here every week?" Kit asked.

"No. When I can. I'm often working on the weekends."

"Bummer," Rory said.

"Isn't it."

A Man passed them in a golf cart, saying hello to their grandfather who politely returned.

"Can I ask you a question?" Kit asked.

"Go ahead.

"What do you do?" she asked, she knew her grandfather worked in finance, but that was it.

"I'm the executive vice-president of the Gehrman-Driscoll Insurance Corporation." he said as if he'd been asked that question a thousand times.

"Wow," Rory said

"Yes."

"And as executive vice-president, what do you do?" Kit asked further. Kit was very interested in differences between jobs and careers, she often thought she would be one of those people who just had a job opposed to a career, she just couldn't see herself doing one thing in till she retired. Maybe she would work in France teaching cello or in a museum in New York or maybe she'll just have a job in some company that does something. Lately, it had become clear that Kit inherited her father wondered gene, but her father was happy right? Even without a clear career path.

"Well, it's a very big company - one of the largest in the United States as a matter of fact - " he started although he seemed enthusiastic when talking about his job, he had this look passed his face, A look that showed the only teenage girls he was used to dealing with was his wayward daughter. "I have a myriad of duties which would bore you greatly to hear about."

"Oh, OK," Rory said, deflated, being interested in the practical side of her grandfather's career while Kit was more invested in the emotional, she could have a perfectly happy life doing this and that job wise as long as the other aspects of her life were fulfilling.

"Do you enjoy it?" She asked.

"Well, I suppose I do, I oversee our international division," he told her, a little more enthusiastic.

"That sounds important," Rory told him.

"Well, it rates a parking spot."

"Do you get to travel a lot?" Rory asked.

"Quite a bit."

"Lucky." Both girls said together, they smiled at each other. As different as they are, sometimes they'd share a thought, one would say what the other was thinking. There was this certain look they gave each other, that said: "I was just thinking that."

"I suspect you have a yen for traveling." he asked the girls.

"We're up to my ears in yens."

"Any particular place you'd like to go?"

"Russia" Kit said "It's the only place I have to go as if my life with being incomplete if I didn't " He hummed before turning to her sister.

"Hundred of places. Paris, Rome, London, Prague, Istanbul, Finland, Fez - Have you ever been to Fez?" Rory listed.

"I can't say that I have."

"I want to go to Fez." She told him, the excitement written all over the face.

"I think traveling for a young girl is a very important thing. Your mother never got a chance to travel much."

"I know. She talks about that all the time." Rory told him, while Kit hummed in support.

"She does?"

"We've got a deal. When we graduate from high school we're going to go backpacking through Europe together. You know, do the whole hostel thing." Rory told him, gaining his full attention as they walking up the path.

"I just hope it really happens." Kit told him.

"Well, we'll just have to make sure that it does." He told his granddaughter, encouragingly.

Just then another golf cart pulled up.

"Richard!" blonde women in a colorful plaid said, a little dog in a matching outfit sat on her lap.

"Gloria! You look wonderful." Using his host voice. Kit and Rory were very used to this voice, after years of holiday parties at their grandparents.

"Aren't you sweet? Is Emily here?"

No, I'm taking my granddaughters for a round of golf."

"Well, we must get together."

"Absolutely."

She pulls away and their grandfather said.

"The most odious woman alive."

"I wondered where I got that from," Kit said, smirking at her grandfather, who smiled back.

The conversation and the golf followed a little easier after that when they finished, the arrived at the 'club' part of the club.

"Now, we'll meet back here in forty minutes?" he told them as they stood outside 'His' and 'Hers' spa doors.

"OK." they said together.

"And then, if you like, we can get some lunch."

"That would be great." Kit said.

"Fine."

"Cool."

"Yes."

"I feel spoiled." Kit told Rory who just smirked at her. The two of them were sitting in the sauna, letting the steam rejuvenate their pours.

"And you know she took the house."

"I could use a someone to follow me around, carrying my cello."

"What you pay them"

"I could pay them in fudge."

"She deserved it - putting up with that tramp all those years."

"You don't know how to make fudge." In a whisper.

"Last year, Christmas, he bought them both the same bracelet."

"Sookie makes it in batches, I could share". Rory chuckled at her sister who never once in her life had shared fudge with anyone who wasn't her.

"She should have just shot him like his first wife did."

"Oh, I love Janie. Is she out yet?"

Both girl's eyes widen at the word shot, who new society prices could be so dangerous. "Nanette, Peg." The women to earlier said, this time without her plaid or dog.

"Gloria, hi. Good game?" One of the gossiping women said.

"Not bad, you?"

"Oh, I just came for the steam. We must get together and play sometime soon." Kit felt like she could invent a drinking game, using that catchphrase.

"Next week?"

"I'll call you."

As Gloria moved into a different part of the spa, the twins heard to women say.

"The most odious woman alive."

"Grandpa's a little gossip, who knew." Kit whispered to her sister.

"She caught him in the pool house with the tennis pro, not the riding instructor." Kit told their grandfather once they sat down for lunch

"I had no idea".

"That committee of yours is not looking at people as much as you think," Rory told him.

"Why would they? From what you've told me they're all involved in one nefarious activity after another."

"It's a conspiracy." Kit said taking a sip of her sweet tea.

"It's Peyton Place. Is there more?" he asked his granddaughter, a hint of mischief in his eyes.

"Can you handle it?" Kit asked him.

"I'll steel myself."

"OK, Mr. Neville likes all things frilly," Rory told him in a hushed whisper.

"Good God. He's my broker," he said exasperatedly. Smoothing out his brows, with his hands

"I don't think one will affect the other." Kit told him. Just then two elderly men approached their table.

"Mind if we barge in?" one of them said.

"Look who's here. Ah, Girls, this is Julian Johnson" he said gesturing to the man in yellow. "And Edward James, These are my granddaughters Rory and Kit"

"Call me "Ed".

"You can call me "Ed" too," Julian said and both men laughed.

"It's nice to meet you." The girls said over each other.

"Would you like to join us?" Richard asked.

"If The girls don't mind us intruding on their time with their families grandfather."

"No, that's fine," Rory told them.

"Oh, that's good. So, we hear you're attending Chilton."

"We just started," Rory told him.

"That's a hard school."

"Yes, sir".

"These girls are excellent students," The Grandfather told the men, proudly as he looked over his menu.

"Really?"

"4.0-grade point average." The girls smiled.

"Whoa! That's got me beat." Both men laughed.

"And Kit here is quite the savant." Kit blushed under his praise.

"They're going to Fez someday."

"Fez? What the hell is in Fez?" Edward asked.

"That's for them to find out," Richard said as he exchanged a look with his granddaughters, who both grinned under his gaze.

The girl drove home after their excursion with their grandfather once they arrived home, the girls made their way to Luke's in search of their mother.

"Interesting hat." Luke said. Rory was playing with the hat their grandmother had given them. Both girls were nursing an oversized cup of coffee. Kit was thinking about the last chapter of the huge English binder she had to do.

"We went golfing with our grandfather today," Rory told him.

"Did you know that golf courses are an environmental blight because of the chemicals they use to keep the grass green?" Kit looked at Luke in disbelief, she knew he was an environmentalist, but he still fished. Luke Danes owed the Diner the Gilmore clan frequented before Luke turned it into a diner it belongs to his Father, who ran a hardware store, he still had the "Dane's Hardware" sign out front, she found that endearing.

"Actually I did."

"She's joking. Luke."

With that, he finished pouring the coffee and walked away. Their mother came bustling, talking a mile a minute.

"My God - this day. The swans, the tulle," Kit giggled.

"my head...Luke, I need the largest cheeseburger in the world. Let's break a record here, mister." She called out to him. Luke responded with a grunt.

"So, the wedding is a nightmare. We got these ten boxes of creepy larvae that are supposed to swarm into beautiful butterflies on the wedding day. They swarmed a little early! What's with the hat?"

"I've got one too" Kit said pulling it out her pocket.

"Grandma gave them to us."

"Oh, now, that's just mean."

"It's not that bad."

"Do you want a mirror?" Kit sniggered, Rory took off her hat.

"So, Gilmore's golfing adventure. Tell me!"

"It was fine," Rory told her.

"Oh, honey, I brought you some of Sookie's chocolate cake to make you feel better." Kit smiled at her mother. Now that they were done with golfing to which Kit was sure after this day she wasn't going to pick up another golf club in her life, she began to think about the large amounts of homework and studying she had to do for her English class, the blinder she'd been given on her first day of school was getting bigger by the day. They'd moved on from Tolstoy to Dickens and were preparing for Shakespeare.

"It really wasn't that bad."

"You are the sweetest kid in the whole world," Their mother told Rory. Kit chuckled taking another sip of coffee.

"Where on earth did you get that from?"

"Luke, am I mistaken or did that sign on the door say "open"?"

"So, where were we?

" Us golfing." Kit answered.

"Right - go."

"OK, well, uh, by the end of the day I could even hit the ball," Rory told her.

"It wasn't always her ball but the intention was good. I don't think golf is for me but id like a golf caddy, if you looking for birthday gifts."

Lorelai rolled her eyes at her youngest daughter.

"Well good intentions and no physical exertion whatsoever is what the game of golf was built on. So, um, did you order?"

"I'm not hungry. I had a big lunch at the club." Rory told her, while Kit hummed in agreement.

"With all the other devastators of our land," Luke told them as he refilled their coffee.

"Luke we're very sorry, on behave of all teenagers that play golf" Kit told him with a winning smile, he smirked at her in response, which made her chuckle slightly.

"You had a big lunch at the club?" She asked them.

"Yes, it was quite good," Rory told her.

"Quite? What's with the quiet?"

"What do you mean?"

"You don't ever say quite."

"I've said quite plenty of times."

"Time to get off this train." Kit told them.

"Whatever. So besides the "quite good" lunch, you had, what else happened?"

"Nothing. We played, we met his friends, we took a steam." Kit told her.

"You took a steam?" Their mother asked shocked

"Yeah. we sweated out all my toxins and Kit stole a towel."

"Wow! Sounds like you really had a good time."

"We did, we found out Grandpa is quite the gossip." She tried to say without smiling.

"Really?"

"Really."

"Really?"

"Really."

"OK, you're making me dizzy." Kit told them.

"Sorry," Their mother told them, Kit could see that this wasn't what she expected her daughters to say.

"I just - I'm surprised." she started, "I thought you were gonna be bored"

"I was kind of surprised too. I don't know" Kit told her, playing with the yellow mug in her hand.

"It was pretty there, and we talk a lot with Grandpa." Her sister finished for her.

"You talked? Really?"

"Don't start this again." Kit said.

"Sorry. You talked?"

"We talked about Fez."

"And he thought it was a hat."

"We told him about our backpacking trip. He thought it was a great idea."

"Wow."

"So you really had fun."

"Yeah." The girls answered together.

"That's great." Luke approached with Lorelai cheeseburger and curly fries.

"That is really, really great." she said not glancing at the burger, Rory began to play with her hat.

"I thought you were starving," Luke asked.

"Things change. Move on."

"Does this hat really look bad on me?" Rory asked, putting the hat back on.

"No. I think it looks kind of cute." Their mother her, Kit smiled at her sister, before stealing some of her mother's fries.

#Gilmore GIrls #Gilmore Girls OC #The Adaptation of Kit Gilmore #Gilmore Girls Fanfiction #Kill Me Now #Luke Danes #Rory Gilmore #Lorelai Gilmore #Emily Gilmore #Richard Gilmore #Paris Geller #Emmett Talbot #Sookie St James

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paigewritestrash-blog · 7 years

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Terrible Things - Kagami Taiga x OC

This is my first post on this account woo! This au was inspired by the song Terrible Things by Mayday Parade.

Warnings: angst

"By the time I was your age, I'd give anything To fall in love truly, was all I could think That's when I met your mother, the girl of my dreams The most beautiful woman, that I'd ever seen." Another usual and exhausting day at practice. Or so I thought, when I saw her walk in with coach. Her black hair was pulled back in a ponytail and it stopped at the middle of her back. Her bright green eyes caught me off guard, and I had to do a double take. She's gorgeous. I feel a sudden pain in my head, and the basketball bounces to the floor. "Kagami-kun, what is your problem?" Kuroko asks. But he follows my gaze to the girl, and sighs. He jabs me in the side. "Go talk to her." I punch him in the side. "No way! Who do you think I am?" I cry out. She's out of my league. The thought of talking to her makes my stomach do flips. I've never been this nervous, not even during basketball games. "I'm too nervous, anyways." I sigh. Kuroko wears a small grin. "That's a shame." I raise a brow. "She's coming over here." Kuroko pats me on the shoulder and smiles. "Good luck." "Oi, Kuroko! Wait-" He walks over to Kiyoshi, leaving me a sweaty mess as the beautiful girl walks over to me, wearing a smile that makes my heart race. "Riko tells me you need help learning how to use your left hand." Her voice is like music to my ears. I can feel my face getting hot. "Um, y-yeah, I do." I scratch the back of my neck nervously. She smiles. "It's nice to meet you, Kagami. I'm Felicity." Her American accent slips through when she says her name. "You're American?" I ask. Felicity nods. "My dad and I moved here in middle school." She picks up a basketball on the ground and spins it on her left hand index finger. "I played a lot of basketball there." She winks. "Thus why I'm going to teach you to use your left hand better." Felicity dribbles the ball and then dribbles it back and forth between each hand. She then turns to face the other half of the court from where we stand, at free throw line. She shoots with her left hand, yet I can't watch the ball. I can't take my eyes off of her.

"She said, "Boy can I tell you a wonderful thing? I can't help but notice, you're staring at me. I know I shouldn't say this, but I really believe, I can tell by your eyes that you're in love with me." Now, son, I'm only telling you this Because life can do terrible things."

She looks at me and flashes me a smile. My heart flutters and I feel hot. "Can I tell you a wonderful thing?" She asks. I nod, not sure what to expect. "I can't help but notice the way you're staring... I know I shouldn't say this, but I can tell by your eyes that you're in love with me." I think my heart stopped beating completely. My face is burning up and I can't say anything. Felicity simply smiles at me again, her cheeks red too. "It's okay if you are. I don't mind." She winks and runs off to the other side of the court to get the ball she shot. I run my fingers through my hair and heave a sigh. Get it together, you're being too obvious. I'd be lying if I said Felicity isn't a good teacher. She made me play a game of one on one only dribbling with my left hand, which she dominated me at. As she predicted, that made me work harder. By the end of the night, even after everyone had left hours before, she had taught me how to switch hands in the air when I dunk. "You did great today!" Felicity exclaims. "Once you learn something, you perfect it very easily." She takes her hair out of her ponytail and shakes it, her long hair flowing to the waistline of her skirt now. I give her a shy smile. I can't stop staring at her. Every time I look at her and then look away, I want more. I can't help but be entranced by every movement she makes. Every word that comes out of her mouth is beautiful and I have to tell myself to snap out of it before I become a flustered mess. No one has ever made me feel this way... "Thank you." I say. "It helps when I have an amazing teacher, too." Her cheeks get red and she smiles. "Since I worked you pretty hard, what do you think about me buying you dinner?" I smile. "Dinner sounds nice. But you don't have to pay." I can't make her pay for my meal, what kind of gentleman would that make me seem like? I may not be good at romance, but I do know that the guy usually pays for the girl. Or at least that's what I learned watching romantic comedies with Alex. "Now, most of the time we'd have too much to drink And we'd laugh at the stars and we'd share everything Too young to notice, and too dumb to care Love was a story that couldn't compare."

After that night, we went on many dates afterwards. After our sixth date, we shared our first kiss, and I determined in that moment, I wanted to marry her. I wasn't one who cared about any of that, but Felicity... I want to call her my wife. And I will one day. We lay on our backs on her roof passing back and forth a bottle of alcohol. She's more of the smoking type, but due to the basketball team's drug tests, I can't. It takes a lot for me to get drunk though, and Felicity is what most would call a lightweight. Although, I don't need to be under the influence of anything to feel good when I'm around her. When she says my name, I feel at peace. "Taiga, what would you do if you won the lottery?" I think hard. "I could eat anything I wanted... And I could have all the shoes I wanted, too." "Shoes and food, that's all you care about?" She laughs. "And you, of course." I say. The longer we date, the more comfortable I get with flirting and being romantic. She moves her head to lay on my chest, and I wrap an arm around her. "If I won the lottery... I'd buy a beautiful house. One with a basketball court, a big, indoor pool..." She trails off. I can hear the smile in her voice. "I'd buy a really nice car. But one I can drive all year around, of course." She stays silent for a minute, thinking. "Oh! And I'd want my house to be fit for children." "Hm, you want kids?" I ask. I've never thought about having children, seeing as I'm only seventeen. I guess girls are different. "I do." She sighs. She doesn't have to be looking at me to tell what I'm thinking. "Don't worry, Taiga." She lets out a small giggle. "I don't want them anytime soon." Her index finger trails up and down my chest lightly. She takes a gulp from the bottle and sits up to straddle my waist, sitting on me. "I love you." Felicity smiles with her words. I know she's drunk, but I guess a drunk mind speaks the sober truth. "Saying it just makes me feel so good. I love you, Kagami Taiga!" She shouts, thrusting both hands in the air. She flops forward and her face is inches from mine. "I. Love. You." She kisses me after every word, and it makes my cheeks turn red. I laugh and swallow hard. I'm slightly buzzed, making this easier to say. "I love you, Felicity." A smile spreads across her face and she hugs me tight. She doesn't let go, she just lays on me with her arms wrapped around me. I don't question it and wrap my arms around her, too. In that moment I hold her as tight as I can. I don't want anything to happen to her. "I said, "Girl, can I tell you a wonderful thing? I made you a present with paper and string. Open with care now, I'm asking you, please. You know that I love you, will you marry me?" Now, son, I'm only telling you this Because life can do terrible things You'll learn, one day, I'll hope and I'll pray, That God shows you differently."

It's the fourth quarter of the winter cup championship game. I'm a third year now, and after this, I'll retire from basketball. After high school I'm going off to school in Tokyo with Felicity. She wants to be a teacher, and I want to become a professional basketball player, and the best player in Japan. This game is going to determine my future, and I feel the pressure as the opposing team continues to score on me. My jumps can overpower them, but it's hard when their players won't even let me jump. After walking back onto the floor after a time out, I hear a familiar voice from the silent crowd. "Kick their ass, Taiga! I believe in you!" My girlfriend waves her arms in the air, wearing a giant smile. That easily brings a smile to my face as I give my team mates one last look before taking my place on the court. The thrill of winning the winter cup again is enough to make me overflow with joy. But when I see Felicity running down the halls to congratulate me, I could burst with happiness. I feel the box in my pocket shift as she jumps onto me, wrapping her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck. I hug her back with as much force as she uses. "I'm so proud of you! Congratulations!" She smiles wide down at me and gives me a sloppy kiss, grabbing my face in her hands. "That last play you made, oh my God!" She exclaims. I'm not sure why, but when she watches me play it makes her... Excited. I set her down on the floor and intertwine my fingers with hers. "I know just how to celebrate. I'm treating you to dinner, and you can order as much as you want." She smiles up at me, swinging our arms as we walk. "Felicity, you don't have to-" "Taiga, don't argue, okay? You deserve this. Treat yourself." As we walk the box in my pocket keeps nagging at me. I'm so happy in this moment, I don't want to wait... I was going to do this tomorrow, but I can't help myself. I stop walking, causing Felicity to give me a confusing look. "Is something wrong?" "Of course not. Can I tell you a wonderful thing?" I let go of her hand and swallow hard, pulling the box from my pocket. Her face twists into a smile. I hand the box to her, which she stares at. It's wrapped in a bow that took me a tedious amount of time, and tries, to tie perfectly. "This was supposed to be for your birthday tomorrow, but I can't wait." "Taiga..." She whispers. "Open it with care, because I'm asking you, please," I wait for her shaky hands to open the box and reveal the ring inside before I get down on my knee. "You know that I love you so much," I try to speak strongly, but my voice falters with my nerves running wild. "Will you marry me?" She doesn't speak, she just nods rapidly through her tears and pulls me to my feet to hug me so tight air escapes my lungs. My heart still beats rapidly as I put the ring on her finger. "Oh, Taiga. You just made my night- No," She shakes her head. "My... My life! I'm so excited, we don't have to rush a thing. I'm just so happy to wear this! It's beautiful-" She talks a mile a minute, her hands around both of my arms, squeezing me tight. "I love you so much, fiance!" Felicity stands on her tip toes to kiss me. I wrap my arms around her and pull her closer to me. This moment is one I've only thought of a million times... Being able to say that I'm going to marry this girl, it makes me so happy words can't explain. Tears are welling in my eyes just thinking about this. My life at this moment is perfect, and I couldn't ask for anything better. "She said, "Boy can I tell you a terrible thing? It seems that I'm sick and I've only got weeks. Please, don't be sad now, I really believe, You were the greatest thing that ever happened to me."

It's been about a year and a half since we graduated high school and went off to college. We may have had a change of plans... Instead of going to school, Felicity agreed she would stay home to raise our child. She hasn't been feeling well lately, though, so the three of us bundled up to face the cold winter weather and go to the doctor. I was forced to stay in the waiting room while she got the results. Our son sleeps soundly in carrier, and I lay my head back against the wall. I hope it's nothing serious... That's all I can think about. When the door opens, I shoot my head to look to my wife, so wears a straight face. "Can I tell you a terrible thing?" Her voice is almost a whisper. My heart stops. I don't want her to say anything else, but she does. "It seems that I'm sick and I've only got weeks... Please don't be sad," She rushes over to me to cup my face in her hands so I look her in the eyes. Her face is blurred with tears that have already formed. It feels like someone dropped a two hundred pound weight on my chest and it's making it hard to breathe. "You are the greatest thing that ever happened to me." I shake my head, biting my lip. "Taiga, it'll be okay..." I shake my head again, sniffling as tears wet my cheeks. I bury my face into her torso, clutching her shirt as I let out muffled cries. "Taiga, please... I love you." Her fingers run through my hair and she rubs my back. "Let's make the most of this month. Do that for me, please?" She asks, her voice shaking as she sniffles. I nod, letting go of her to finally look at her face. I take in everything about it I can. Her beautiful black hair and sad, green eyes that usually twinkle with life. "Of course." I manage. "Let's go home." "So don't fall in love, there's just too much to lose If you're given the choice, then I beg you to choose To walk away, walk away, don't let her get you. I can't bear to see the same happen to you. Now, son, I'm only telling you this Because life can do terrible things."

I finish my story, sitting across the kitchen table from my son, who's now thirteen years old. He's asked me for years about her, and at first I ignored it, and told him I'd tell him when he got older. "So is mom in Heaven?" He asks with tears in his eyes. It breaks my heart to see him sad, but after years of giving him short answers, I realized there is no better time than now. I want him to know his mother, as I did. Remembering her as she was when we were together, it brings back that hole in my chest I felt the day she told me she was sick. It aches and makes it difficult to breathe. I nod, biting my lip. "She is. And you know where else she is?" I ask. "Where?" "She's in our memories, too." I bite my lip and exhale shakily. "She's watching both of us, and she's always with us. Remember that." He nods and gives me a small, reassuring smile. "You don't have to feel sad now, dad. It's just like you said, she's watching both of us. Plus, you always have me. We're a family." His red eyes seem solemn. My sadness has affected him all of these years. I give him a sad smile. "You're right." I sit back in my seat and heave a sigh. "I'll try to be better from now on. For you." The dull ache in my chest isn't as dark and brooding. She's always with us.

#kagami taiga #kagami taiga imagine #kuroko no basket #kuroko no basket imagine #kagami taiga au #angst #this is so sad still #kuroko tetsuya

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katya-is-here · 7 years

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Chapter Three - Letters from Lance

Hey guys! Here’s Chapter Three of LETTERS FROM LANCE! Added some extra Klance scenes in this, since Lance is finally realizing his long, lost feelings for Keith. Thanks again for all the support!

If you’d like updates or just wanna say hi feel free to follow me on Twitter!

Twitter: katyaszew

⬅ Read Chapter Two

Summary: Pidge invites Lance to a drive-in movie, but his mind is stuck on Keith and only Keith. Speaking of Keith, Lance finds him all beaten up in the gym locker room and wonders why. His feelings blossom when the two share a bonding moment, even though it goes terribly wrong.

Dear you,

I don't know about you but the smell of coffee always gets me high. The buzzed kind of high, where I feel like I can take on the world, be a king for a day, you know, that kind of stuff. Pidge always liked brewing me a free cup whenever I hung around the high school campus' cafe. She was a barista there — the stained apron and all.

"You seem — out of it," Pidge said as she wiped down the tables. "This have something to do with Keith?"

I scowled. "Enough with the Keith crap! Keith this, Keith that! Sheesh, it's like this whole school's obsessed with the dude."

Pidge fixed her specs. The sun peaked through the gray thunderclouds and shined against the lenses. "Right. Anyway, speaking of being obsessed with something, have you heard about the new drive-in movie theater down by the parking lot?"

I shrugged. "So?"

"So everyone's been talking about it." Pidge tightened her apron. "Not that I'm into trends or anything, but I think it'd be kinda fun to hang there."

"What are they playing?"

"Sixteen Candles."

"A chick flick? C'mon, what about action films or...or even some comedy."

Pidge grinned. "Sixteen Candles is a romantic comedy so—"

"No! I mean—" I slammed my foot onto the table. "—the BOOM! POW! BANG! kinda action!"

"Oh c'mon dude! Now I gotta clean it!" Pidge knocked me to my knees and scrubbed the table. "When are you gonna grow up?"

I smirked and leaned on the counter. "Aw, you're a cute little nerd when you're angry."

Pidge held out her hand. She fixed her specs again.

"What? A high five?" I said.

She pouted. "Pay up. No free coffee for you today bud."

"Oh c'mon! You know I'm broke!"

Pidge sighed and went over by the register. "Then get a job like every normal student here."

"Depends on how you define normal." I headed for the door. "Lance McClain defies the word normal."

"Hey! You still owe me!"

Bells jingled from above. Customers flooded the cafe. I smiled. "I'll treat you to the drive-in tonight."

"You're going?"

I shrugged. "I've got nothing better to do."

A few jocks shoved me out of the way and I stumbled on the cool pavement. I looked up and sighed. This was my high school—tall buildings chock-full of your stereotypical teens, balding Autumn trees, lakes where the seniors liked to drink, hang around bonfires and throw these crazy parties and the occasional guitar player. It was a campus full of teen angst and raging hormones. Oh, and let's not forget there was always someone making out behind the headmaster's building and someone else taking pictures of it for blackmail. Classic.

Some guy kicked a football in my direction and I ducked. He was playing with Shay who wore her HUNK'S MY HERO t-shirt. I sighed and pulled out my phone. I had one message. Shocked it wasn't from Shiro. It was from that bastard Sendak.

SENDAK [8:34AM]: U BETTER watch urself lil' shit

I smirked. Whatever. I had some free time to spare before I had to run laps around the track, commanded by Professor Iverson who loved giving us students the beat down. But I headed for the locker room anyway to chill in the showers. Whistling as I waltzed by my locker and popped in my combo, I pulled off my uniform and exchanged it for a pair of shorts and a baggy sweatshirt. I wrapped a towel around my waist and headed for the showers.

The shower head grubbed and coughed up hot water as I stood beneath it and took a breather. The day started out great — peaceful, no weird dreams from the night before, no —

"KEITH!" someone shouted.

I gasped. I peeked from the shower curtain and saw Keith slamming the locker room door shut, a can of spray paint in his hand.

"You're SO going to pay for this, bastard!" the voice cracked again. It was one of Keith's Galra basketball teammates.

Keith laughed, mockingly. There was a pause, silence.

"Hello?" Keith said. His voice echoed against the walls.

I gasped and turned off the water.

"Anybody in here?"

I slid down the wall and watched him from afar.

He tossed up his can of spray paint, shook it as it crackled and doused the lockers with thick, dripping red paint. I gasped. His message read:

KEITH OWNS YOUR ASS SENDORK

I couldn't help but to laugh, but stopped. Stared. Keith fell to his knees. The spray paint bottle rolled under the benches. Looking closer I noticed he was covered in bruises, his lip puffy, eyes bloodshot and purple, hair disheveled. He kicked out one leg and hugged the other into his chest.

"DAMN IT!" he cried. "Stupid! Stupid! STUPID!"

He tugged at his hair, his nose running with snot. As I looked closer I slipped on the tiles and whacked my chin.

"Shit!"

Eyes wide, Keith looked up. We stared at each other for awhile until he ran out of the locker room, red faced and embarrassed.

"Keith! W...wait!" I shouted.

But he was gone.

All throughout Professor Coran's astronomy lesson I stared at my phone. Should I text him? Should I ask if he was okay? Shit. I couldn't think straight. My phone vibrated mid-way through the lecture and I peeked at it. 5:40 PM. It was Hunk.

LANCE [10:10 AM]: something happened with keith and i dunno what to do

HUNK [10:30 AM]: Sorry it took me so long to respond. I was helping Shay study. Sounds serious. What happened?

LANCE [10:31 AM]: something shitty with sendork and his minions

LANCE [10:31 AM]: he was all beat up and whatever

HUNK [10:33 AM]: Nice that you care, but maybe you shouldn't get involved. Let Shiro know.

LANCE [10:40 AM]: nope no nope i can't

LANCE [10:40 AM]: i gotta do something

HUNK [5:40 PM]: Lance, no! Don't tell me you did something already! Please!

I didn't bother to answer and turned off my phone. Hunk was right. My nose was already stuck where it didn't belong.

After Coran's lesson I scurried to my dorm and got changed into my casual Lance wear, an old, gray t-shirt, an olive-brown jacket and some jeans. I checked my face in the mirror and sighed. My tan skin looked dehydrated, my eyes bagged with dark circles.

I wanted to head over to the spa for a Lance Day just to get my complexion back. And my old self. Ever since Keith and I broke up I became a slob who let himself go. And I feel comfortable enough to admit that to you.

I took out my phone.

LANCE [5:55 PM]: u ready to party with me pidgey-poo

PIDGE [5:57 PM]: Don't call me that. And sure.

PIDGE [5:57 PM]: You go on ahead. I have to meet up with Matt about something first.

I sighed.

LANCE [5:58 PM]: have it your way

LANCE [5:59 PM]: see u then

LANCE [5:59 PM]: i'll be the handsome stud

PIDGE [6:00 PM]: See u

With a stretch and a yawn, I kicked myself forward and headed out the dormitory. These guys were skateboarding and arguing over some '90s cartoons and movies. I flashed a grin at most of them, being my "popular" self, and hurried through the campus.

It was easy to find the drive-in. It was an abandoned parking lot, jammed between a cluster of pines and an old mill. Students sat on top of the mill's roof, swigging down booze and lighting expensive brands of cigarettes. Some guys even brought a keg and got covered in the crap. This was where Pidge wanted to hang? Talk about peer pressure.

I leaned against a tree and tried finding an empty seat. Some idiots were sprawled out on the grass, making out, while others were actually excited about seeing the movie, sitting on the hoods of cars and munching on popcorn. I could smell the butter miles away. That and the beer.

As I scoped out the area I saw someone sitting on a beaten up car alone, his back turned away from the world. Keith. I sucked in my pride, my heart overwhelmed with worry and anxiety, and headed for the lot. I stopped beside Keith's car and knocked on the hood. He glanced at me, but looked away, his knees still hugged to his chest.

"Oh, what? I didn't HAVE to stop by."

"Why are you here?"

I scratched my cheek. "Uh, Pidge. We wanted to check this place out."

"Oh, well it's shit." Keith sipped at a can of beer and sighed. He wore a tight, black short-sleeve shirt that made him look so...okay, kind of cool. "I come out here almost every night to watch whatever's playing, just to kill some time."

I shrugged. Without thinking I hopped up on the hood next to him.

"What are you doing?"

I sighed. "Shut up."

He offered me the can of beer. He muscle flexed. I blushed and shook my head. "What happened to you today?"

"Hm?"

"In the locker room?"

"So that dork was you." Keith shook his head. "You worried about me 'er something?"

"No!" I cleared my throat. "No."

"I got kicked off the team," Keith said, his face blank.

"What?"

"Yup. Sendork beat my ass and—"

I looked at him, staring. Emotions of concern jumbled on my face. A cool breeze blew through our hair.

"Lance?"

I calmed my heartbeat and grabbed onto Keith's wrist. I yanked him from the hood of the car and ran through the lot. Pidge arrived. She watched as I dashed passed her.

"Hey, Lance! What're you doing?"

I didn't answer and kept running, running, running.

"Lance! Where the hell are we going?" Keith shouted.

I took him deep into the forest of pines, until fog began to swarm around us. I breathed heavily, a raw, sharp coolness smothering my throat. Keith bent over and grasped his knees.

"What...the hell, Lance?"

"What did h...he...what did he do to you?"

Keith pushed his bangs out of his eyes. "Nothing. Sure he beat me up and everything, but I did it to myself."

I looked back at him, my eyes sharp.

"Shouldn't you be watching the movie with Pidge?"

I shook my head and moved closer to Keith. He raised a brow, his back pressed against a pine tree.

"Hey, Lance. Focus."

My cold breath puffed in the air, mixing with his. He smelt like booze and stale gasoline.

"Lance?"

I looked at him. My eyes felt heavy.

"I...I miss driving in your car, taking road trips," I whispered against him. "I miss talking about space and...and making jokes about astronauts."

Keith hadn't looked away.

I shook his shoulders. "I miss eating fast food, studying together, watching cheesy movies. I—"

Keith brought his hand to my chest and grabbed onto my t-shirt. I blushed and moved closer to him. The cool air became hot. Nervous.

"Keith..."

Keith pressed his hand to my lips and slightly pushed me away. He was blushing too, but looked impatient. "No. Just stop, Lance."

Embarrassed over what I did I folded my arms and cleared my throat. "What? Yeah, yeah, that's what I would've shown Hunk. He's been tryin' to get all romantic with Shay so..."

Keith put his hands on his hips and frowned. "Why is it when I say I miss you, you act like a freakin' bastard, but when you do you expect me to say everything's okay?"

I scratched my arms. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Keith shoved me. "We have a bonding moment and you get like this? Ha! Classic Lance." He threw his arms up, and made a face. "Whatever, I'm done."

He headed back toward the parking lot.

"Wait! Keith!" I shouted.

He shoved his hands into his pockets. The dried leaves crunched beneath his feet. "I'm done waiting."

And as I watched him walk away I noticed his mullet was growing back. My stomach felt twisted into knots. What did I just do? And why?

Your friend (who's in drastic need of moral support right now),

Lance

#klance #klance fic #klance fanfic #klance fan fic #klance fanfiction #vld #voltron #voltron legendary defender #keith x lance #lance x keith #letters from lance

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yoloaxel · 7 years

Text

Putting an end to the taboo of menstruation

Impact on the competition, the recovery, the mental... Because they're women before being athletes, they have to deal with menstruation. A sensitive topic that has been silenced for too long but that athletes accept to talk about now. A first for France.

“I don't feel well, because of... you know...” How many times has this kind of words been heard in an athlete's mouth off the court, near a racetrack or near a swimming pool? Sometimes, we have to admit that we did not see it. Or we suppressed this thought. Sometimes, it is a coach who slipped in a little sentence that is a bit more explicit: “Well yeah, it happens once a month...” But above all, how many times an athlete who did not have a good performance did not dare to say this kind of enigmatic sentence? Or chose to hide behind a lie, like a gastroenteritis, as if it was less shameful? And yet, it has always been clear that the vast majority of athletes are of childbearing age and that potentially thousands of them have not been able to explain why they had failed at some point. What if we had to look back at the records on this matter again? The question then becomes abysmal.

In recent years, the society has fortunately been able to hear a few stars come out of the closet, but there is still another taboo left in sport: menstruation, the time of the month, period! Something a bit 'dirty' and so intimate that it would be necessary to silence it or hide it while, according to the study conducted by Insep [National Institute of Sport, expertise, and performance (Institut national du sport, de l'expertise et de la performance)] gynecologist, Carole Maitre (read the interview below), in 2008-2009, 37% of the athletes consider the pain of menstruation as a discomfort to their activity and require treatment, and 64% think that premenstrual syndrome significantly decreases their performance. In January 2015, our British colleagues had fallen out of their chair when tennis player Heather Watson, Great Britain's number one at that time, had dared to explain that her premature defeat at Australian Open had something to do with “a ladies’ thing”. Wow! We thought about this occurrence again when at the last Olympic Games Chinese swimmer Fu Yuanhui apologized for “dropping [her] partners” during the 4x100m (4th) to the mic of national channel CCTV: “It's because my menstruation arrived yesterday and I felt tired.” In a country where tampons are still culturally rarely used, Fu became a heroine.

After that, we thought that time has come for us to break the silence too. Not all the athletes we contacted accepted, but many did not hesitate, with a confusing and reassuring simplicity, because they had suffered, sometimes alone and without any reason, sometimes because of the lack of information. “It's a topic that must absolutely be discussed and that we should study more,” marathon record woman Paula Radcliffe immediately said. “Because this topic is related to all activities of an elite athlete, her training planning, the repercussions on the competitions, the recovery, the mindset. This reflection is essential to reach the highest level possible in her career.”

Radcliffe thus explains how her first world record (2:17:18″') was just a question of hours, in 2002 in Chicago. “I got my period on the morning of the race. It was not ideal but frankly, it was better than if they had started the next day.” First cliché destroyed. In general, athletes suffer more from premenstrual syndrome meaning symptoms occurring the week before (heavy legs, water retention, gastrointestinal problems and loss of energy for Radcliffe), than the pains felt at the start of menstruation, attenuated by the adrenaline during competition. “I had to get up in the morning while thinking that the day was going to be extremely complicated,” reported former international basketball player Emmeline Ndongue. “But you're focusing on something else when you get to the game and you don't feel the pain too much.”

Swimmer Charlotte Bonnet, for example, has sore upper legs, to the point that, she feels “a weight pulls her down” in the water

Through these testimonies, we could see how menstruation can make athletes' life hell with its procession of lack of energy, back pains, migraine, cramps, belly pain that can be terrible, lack of sleep, vomiting... Not to mention personal specifics: swimmer Charlotte Bonnet, for example, suffers from the upper legs, “at the insertion of the thighs”, to the point that in the water, she has the impression that “a weight pulls her down”. Gabriella Papadakis, Ice Dance World Champion, saw girls feeling so much pain that they were unable to skate, despite having swallowed ibuprofen: “After a while, we get used to it. But sometimes I think that if I were a guy and I never had my period, it would be really great!”

Since it is a natural process, we realized that women accept pain and learn how to deal with it... sometimes with a coach who does not take this into account. Or to whom they do not dare to speak to. "This summer, in WNBA (the female equivalent of NBA) in Los Angeles, a teammate suffered so much that, despite the pain-killing pills, she was on the floor and we tried to relieve her pain by putting warm towels on her stomach," remembered Sandrine Gruda, center of France basketball National Team. "Since the coach is a man, she didn't dare to tell him. Would it have been a throat infection, we would've naturally talked about it. This is why, in the staffs, there's usually a woman, a physiotherapist or an assistant coach."

Olivier Krumbholz, France women's handball National Team coach, confirmed: “Things are directly regulated with the doctor. They don't talk to me about it. It's medical. I never had a discussion about it with one of the girls. We try to have complicity with the players, but we have a limit, which is intimacy.” Official team doctor since 1995, Gérard Juin can tell the coach that a player is not well without saying why... And if it is rare that a player feels so bad that it could justify a stop, when it happens, it is he who discusses with the staff: "It's not necessarily spontaneously understood, but it's important because a peripheral disturbance is a source of injury.” The pain distracts the player who can misplace her pelvis for example. “This topic comes up regularly with the girls,” continued June. “But it's rarely disruptive in team sports.” Basketball players revealed how they would count on their teammates who knew they were diminished on these days.

In individual sports, the situation gets more complicated, particularly in sporting disciplines with weight categories. 2016 Karate World Champion in -55 kg category, Emily Thouy revealed: “It's just horrible! There was a time where I had to go running during the competition because I had gained 2 kg whereas, two days later, I was 3 kg below! Feeling like you're dying because of the hot flushes and because your body hurts during the warm-up is hell.” Almost all of them have worries about controlling their weight during this duration: not only because they gain weight, but also because they have more difficulty to lose it. Rio Olympic Games silver medalist in -63 kg category, judoka Clarisse Agbegnenou is one of them. Not those who are making the topic of menstruation with her coaches a taboo but “sometimes they get embarrassed, so I rub it in and add: 'My tampon has slid out, it hurts so I have to go to adjust it back.' They say: 'Yes, it's okay, just go, we don't need to know everything!' It makes me laugh! But I know that not everyone has the same facilities as I to talk about it.” And things can become very serious.

Boxer Sarah Ourahmoune, Rio Olympics silver medalist as well (in -51 kg category), has just retired at age 35 and told us how she endured many problems in a sport then new for women: “You have iron deficiency [which can lead to iron deficiency anemia], you recover less well than usual, you feel asphyxiated when you make lactic efforts, you make water retention and, in addition, in boxing, you take blows in the belly”, listed Ourahmoune. “I remember a France VS Italy where my period arrived earlier than expected. My loins hurt and I was throwing up everywhere during the weigh-in. Since I was fighting the main event, my coach told me that I could not not go.” Not surprising that one of her teammates in the national team was glad that she no longer had had her menstruation for a long time. “She said that she was more than fine with it. She wasn't worried because no one told her it was serious.”

Speaking on condition of anonymity, a gymnast reveals in a thin voice that at twenty, she has never menstruated

However, for Insep gynecologist Carole Maitre, these problems of absence of menstruation (called ‘amenorrhea’) that some athletes have, are in fact a medical concern. She treats them from six months on. Often observed in sports with weight or endurance categories, they are usually a sign of overwork and an alert as for the increased fragility of the body, with consequently stress fractures. The issue gets even trickier with gymnasts, who start competing at a young age, before their first menstruation. Speaking on condition of anonymity, one of them reveals in a thin voice that at 20, she has never menstruated: “Since I was young, I'm under the care of an endocrinologist because I'm too short. I had three stress fractures. I only noticed it because I had pains. I took estrogen and progesterone. I don't know if it's related to gymnastics, but it's possible...”

Aware of the particular problem of her sport on this subject, the freshly retired gymnast Youna Dufournet is delighted that we and athletes speak out about it, convinced that girls are not sufficiently aware of this matter. She had her first menstruation three months before her 20th birthday, a week after London Olympic Games, and is convinced that psychology has played a key role. “The doctors told me that I overtrained and couldn't be relaxed enough to have my period. With the Olympics, I had achieved some of my goals. But after that, I went from feeling the need to have them because I was distressed to see that all my friends had them, to an ordeal because it was really painful.” Youna also remembered a competition where a girl who was younger than her was still lying in her bed one hour before the competition because of the pain and who had to take hot baths. “In addition, menstruation is really irregular for gymnasts and that makes another anxiety for us! Because of that, retiring is a relief.”

The vast majority of athletes we interviewed found an effective remedy to their struggle in the holy pill. Regularity of the cycles, less abundant losses, less pain... and the possibility of using two contraceptive pill packages in a row so this intimate enemy does not come to disturb their biggest competition of the season. “It's so great!” Charlotte Bonnet said. Except that taking the pill may come up against various obstacles. For example, parents do not see their twelve-year-old daughter leave to competitions with pills with in a favorable light. “We should also inform parents to demystify the pill because taking them doesn't necessarily mean that we're sleeping with someone,” Youna Dufournet added with a smile, for who taking the pill went with an important weight gain. It has come to the point that since three years, she chose progestin-only pills (mini-pills) not to have her menstruation. “I'll stop soon because I'm no longer training [she retired last season] and the pain will hinder me less than during my life as an athlete...”

To each woman her own particularity, to each sportsman her way to deal with menstruation. Paula Radcliffe barely used pills, “just for 10 or 15 days, to keep period away from the main goal” of her season, because she felt that pills made her “less aggressive, which is decisive in a race.” Gabriella Papadakis has recently chosen [contraceptive] implant due to her frequent trips and changes of time zones. She does not have “enough distance on the situation” to take pills every day. Skier Anne-Sophie Barthet explained that, on menstrual days, “her legs feel like cotton but she explodes her power scores” and decided to try without contraception and deal with mood swings and a more pronounced stomach ache.

As for Doctor Gérard Juin, he recalled that the endless collective sports calendar makes the idea of delaying menstruation obsolete. A fact that also applies to the very case apart that is tennis. In a sport where tournaments follow one after another for eleven months, the dates of menstruation necessarily coincide with days where they compete. At last season's Roland-Garros, Czech Petra Kvitova [ranking of world no. 10 at that moment] had strangely lost 6-0, 6-7, 6-0 against Shelby Rogers, ranking of world no. 108: “Simply because I had my period, that I couldn't sleep and that I had no energy.” A confession that is still rare two years after British tennis player Heather Watson's words.

Truth is, that over the testimonies we came to the conclusion that athletes have blended so much menstruation into their status as women that, as long as they are not in agony like one of their training partners, they often minimize the consequences on their performances. Former 200m Indoor World Champion Muriel Hurtis talked about how “lucky” she was not to have been too affected by menstruation during her career, but nevertheless mentioned a slight fatigue and a slight weight gain. In short, probably as many hundredths, sprint unit of measurement, gone up in smoke. Not to mention the issue about what she is wearing. “Is it obvious or not?” A stain, a tampon string... “Just thinking about that makes you completely lose focus on competition,” stated Marion Lotout, the current best French pole-vaulter. And yet, they all think of it. And it seems obvious that those old English gentlemen who once imposed white outfits at Wimbledon did not care.

In fencing too, athletes worry about whether they have unsightly stains on their beautiful white pants or not. According to fencer Ysaora Thibus, no girl can escape from it: “Sometimes we ask to each other to look at the other person's pants to see if there’s a stain or not. It already happened to me...” During her menstruation, her partner Anita Blaze admits she “doesn't make certain moves”: “There was a time where it was bleeding more than usual. My pants were dirty and my sister warned me about it. The problem was that I only had one, so I continued my competition this way. I told myself that I didn't want to have that happening to me anymore.” Emmeline Ndongue said something similar: “There's always that day when you play in white and you ask other people to warm you before entering the piste [fencing playing area] if you have a spot. It happened to a teammate once. She got up from the bench and we told her: 'Don’t! Sit down, please' ...”

Did you say embarrassing? The situation can get even worse! Karateka Emily Thouy said she saw a girl lose her sanitary pad during a battle: it fell on the fighting surface. “She clearly wasn't feeling well... We saw the scene, but then the two athletes were saying it belonged to the other... It was something hard to deal with.” To deal with the white outfit, Thouy has her technique: “I'm fully prepared, I wear at least two or three boxers, cycling pants... Everything to make sure nothing happens! I change it every thirty minutes, I'm always panicking...” But others cannot use this technique.

At the swimming pool, it is hell. Charlotte Bonnet: “We're wearing swimsuits so it's the first thing we see. Thinking about changing the tampon, knowing if it will sink or not, it's very tiresome. At the beginning, you're really terrified!” I already had to tell to friends many times: ‘We can see a little bit of the tampon string, there!’ It's really embarrassing. When I have my period, I check it non-stop, I'm a little paranoid.” In ice dance and figure skating, it is hell as well. Gabriella Papadakis: “The short white dresses, the legs up in the air where you see everything... I never had any major issues for the moment, but sometimes there are girls asking in panic in the locker room: 'Does someone has a tampon, please?’” And in gymnastic, it is still hell. Youna Dufournet: “You have to realize that we compete while wearing in leotards, that the French team's attire is white and that we often have legs spread... When you are a top athlete, we already have enough problems to deal with. And if you add period, it's a lot...”

Just when we thought we were done, Marion Lotout interrupted us. “I've been wondering about this for a long time... The coaches as well, and no one has the answers. There aren't enough scientific studies about it. I noticed that during the year where I stopped the pill, my period was delayed in case of important physical activity. Wouldn't it then be necessary to compensate?” According to her, the pill is the easiest solution for them, but it remains a drug which real function is not to regulate period. “So who knows what the body would gain by not using the pill?” As for Paula Radcliffe, this problem has been ignored or treated in a too empirically for years. She limited her dairy product consumption, others used acupuncture... “We are only a handful of elite athletes to think about the best way to deal with. Most sports physicians are men and don't really understand. We need more women and more scientific studies should be done on this matter.” It would be on this condition that we could one day consider this ridiculous taboo as something part of the past.

"Between 50 and 60% of women ask me to shift their menstruation to later"

Insep gynecologist Carole Maitre evoked the different perturbations that motivate the consultations of the athletes. And the risks associated with them, far from being trivial.

Is menstruation part of the concerns mentioned during your consultations?

Yes. Many athletes, even doctors, are not informed about menstruation. There is a two-hour module on female athletes in sports medicine training, but it is not compulsory ... For a long time, being a female coach was an exception, and men sometimes consider stomach ache as an alibi. Menstruation is a topic that we do not talk enough about.

What do athletes consult you for?

20% of them because they do not have their menstruation. Spontaneous amenorrhea [absence of menstruation in a woman of reproductive age] affects between 10 and 40% of women depending on the sport. They end up asking me questions because it is not in the standard. But the most frequent case, between 50 and 60% are the to ask me a one-time menstruation shift.

The absence of menstruation is often considered practical...

But the practical side is nothing compared to the short, medium and long-term risk. It leads to injury. The decrease in estrogen secretions, which are necessary for bones, has an impact on bone mineral density. Taking treatments does not necessarily mean a total recovery of estrogen secretions. I recently had a young woman who, at 22 years old, had suffered from two stress fractures. This is not acceptable! Estrogens are also involved in energy metabolism. They play an important role in the glucose uptake into muscle cells and then the storage of glycogen. In amenorrhea, fatigue is greater.

What is the cause of this amenorrhoea?

With such important amount of training, the nutritional intake does not bring enough calories compared to to the energy expenditure. When this reserve intervenes just to ensure the basic metabolism, the organism has a saving strategy. Inevitably, it does not put to rest the heart or the brain, but a non-vital organism: the ovarian stimulation system.

Is shifting your menstruation repeatedly a problem?

Not if it is for three or four months. In fact, it is not menstruation themselves that are a problem, but the week that precedes them because of the premenstrual syndrome. In the study we conducted on 363 sports at Insep in 2008-2009, 83% of women said that they already had premenstrual syndrome symptoms. During menstruation, estrogens can stimulate the water retention system and cause weight gain. There may also be some joint and ligament instability.

What other problems do athletes face?

Late menstruation or irregular ones. However, very long cycles have the same metabolic effects as amenorrhea. 75% of athletes told us their menstruations are irregular. And for sports started at a very young age, like the gym, there may be primary amenorrhea (the delay of the first menstruation) for the same reasons. Until 17 years, we do not intervene. Afterward, a treatment can be given. First menstruation appearing at 20 can cause a bone density problem. The moment of the end of a growth is delayed but not affected. Our study showed that the average age of first menstruation was 13 years and 2 months, which is very similar to the general population.

How to handle the pain of menstruation in competition?

Studies show that dysmenorrhea (painful menstrual periods) can affect training – it is the case for 65% of athletes in our study – but that pain tends to disappear during competition. The amount of beta-endorphins secreted is so high that the threshold of sensitivity to pain explodes.

Can their trigger be psychological?

Yes, sometimes the athlete is so stressed that her menstruation happens. If it can be blocked for psychological reasons, it can also be triggered for the same reason, when it was not expected, by somatization.

Can some treatments be assimilated to doping?

Nothing that I prescribe is prohibited. Hormonal treatments do not reach proportions that could disturb a biological passport. We might have to need a therapeutic use permit later on for an ovulation stimulation to get pregnant... But that is another topic.

#sports #women in sport #paula radcliffe #charlotte bonnet #gabriella papadakis #sandrine gruda #emily thouy #clarisse agbegnenou #sarah ourahmoune #youna dufournet #marion lotout #.... many sports there #translation

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