#I have an unhealthy attachment to this song | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

starryknight-tarot · 4 months

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𝓐𝓭𝓿𝓲𝓬𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓷𝓮𝓮𝓭 𝓽𝓸 𝓱𝓮𝓪𝓻

pile 1 -- > pile 2 pile 3 -- > pile 4

my masterlist<3 . paid readings

Howdy my beautiful souls✨ I'm officially back! It feels like it has been forever since I last worked on a pac for y'all! Thank you all for the messages wishing for my health, I am feeling much better. Today we will be looking into advice you need to hear! I might be a little blunt so keep that in mind. Remember to meditate, take a deep breath, and pick whatever pile calls to you the most. My readings are meant for everyone, no matter what sexuality or identity you are. Since this is a general reading, make sure to take what resonates and leave what doesn't. Credit to @chachachannah for the divider!

Pile 1 Cards: Ace of Pentacles rx, Page of Swords, The Devil, The Star, King of Wands, Seven of Cups, Two of Pentacles, Queen of Pentacles Back of the Deck: Page of Wands

There is a lot to go over here Pile 1, you may have been going through it recently or things may feel pretty chaotic for you right now. For you guys, there are somethings you may be turning a blind eye to and opportunities you haven't been taking. Right now you need to take some time to plan and TAKE ACTION! Think about what you want and what you need to do to accomplish this task. And while this is time for action, be careful not to overwhelm yourself with responsibilities, or rush into anything without properly thinking it through. You may be putting yourself down, thinking whatever you want is impossible or out of reach, it isn't. In fact, I heard it's right in front of you or hidden in plain sight. There may be negative affirmations that you are either hearing from yourself or someone else and it is only pulling you further from your goals when you listen to these words, absorb them, and view them as fact when they aren't. You need to keep in mind the power of words and how they can not only effect you, but the people around you. I heard "when you go around with a loser mentality, you are only going to get a loser result" so even in situations where you feel like you are going to lose or that something won't be successful, you need to try to think positive anyway. I know that isn't the easiest request, however, actively reminding yourself of your positive affirmations and staying determined to keep trying when things get hard can take you further than you ever thought you could go. Use your creative brain and I heard be willing to use your heart in certain situation. With the Seven of Cups, there may be a situation or even a person around you that isn't what you think. Be aware of signs that things don't entirely add up or make sense. For some of yall, this is going to be about a travel destination or someone may be offering something that isn't real. With the Devil energy, you may have an unhealthy addiction to something, for some of you I am hearing your phone or social media (who isn't now a days). You may have been consuming too much media and it is really taking a toll on you. Whatever the addiction is, this can go two way for you, you can take the proper action to help yourself or keep hurting yourself by not getting the help you need. Pile 1, you have so much potential and abundance that can be coming your way if you would just believe in yourself!

Advice Cards:

Be bold. It's time to lead forward!

Release what you do not need. Let go of some extraneous aspect of your life

It's time to challenge old beliefs!

Release all attachments that do not serve you

Complete the project or task. Something is calling for closure

Create an internal structured frame of reference and stay focused

Channeled Songs:

Pile 2 Cards: Knight of Swords, Temperance, The Empress rx, Nine of Swords rx, Knight of Wands, The Emperor, Ace of Wands rx Back of the Deck: Ten of Wands

For my Pile 2, we need to talk about how you see yourself and your own self-confidence. I actually feel like this group is divided into two groups, some of you need to work on your confidence and how you interact with yourself. You may be putting yourself down and you need to stop it! You have wonderful energy Pile 2 and deserve love and compliments just as much as others! You just need to see what everyone else sees. You are refusing people because you may have been taught that complimenting yourself shows signs of selfishness and narcissism, something along those lines. It isn't true, you are talented and strong and deserve all the compliments and praise you receive! For the second group of you, I actually want to say to keep it up and don't give up! You may feel a little out of inspiration and creativity but you may just need time to process your thoughts and really figure out what you need to do! Stay confident and positive in your work! I heard this confidence and outgoing nature is your greatest ally. In the moments that you feel like you can't get anything right and things seem impossible, remember who you are! You are that bitch! The sky is the limit for you Pile 2. You can do it, you just need to trust in yourself, beware of last minute nerves that sneak up on you and make you doubt yourself. Also don't be afraid to take bold action and maybe even trying your hand at a leadership position, you have what it takes you just need to believe in yourself. I think that is a big message here for my Pile 2s, believing what you want is possible and just doing it. I know that sounds like a hard task but I really feel like for my Pile 2s, you guys don't even realize your potential and it almost physically hurts me. Some of yall also need to take a step away from worrying about your appearance, it is only hurting you in a really unhealthy way. My Pile 2s are so beautiful inside and out and shouldn't forget that. You may need to work more on your divine masculine energy, regardless of your gender. (There is a little similar energy to Pile 1 so if you felt called, please do read Pile 1)

Advice Cards:

It is time to take appropriate action

A rite of passage allows you to move forward into new realms

Weigh your situation carefully

Give yourself your own approval

Create a plan and take the first step

Give up resistance in your current situation

Channled Songs:

Pile 3 Cards: King of Swords rx, Nine of Cups rx, Page of Wands rx, Nine of Wands, Two of Swords rx, King of Pentacles, Four of Wands, Eight of Wands rx Back of the Deck: Five of Wands

I think for my Pile 3's, you need to stop being so strict on yourself, I am also hearing that you need to surrender to something. There may an event or situation that you have been avoiding for a long time now and spirit is saying that it's time to face this and accept the result. This may be something that you feel pushes you farther from your goals or you are just afraid of the unknown of the situation, something along these lines. I am hearing that even if the situation seems like it is bound to end badly, the result isn't going to be as bad as you think, it may even end with a pretty good result! I am also getting that for some of you, you are going to or are currently facing a tough decision that is making you stressed and anxious, especially if this decision feels really important, I think spirit wants you to follow your heart with this decision. With the King of Swords, I feel like following what seems logical in this may have a more harmful result then you would have liked. But also remember that you have time, with this decision but also just in general. There is time, life feels like it moves very fast but it may help you to take some time to slow down. I am feeling a breeze and I'm seeing you in nature, feeling a nice breeze blow through your hair. You may want to connect with nature more, I am hearing for some of you, you may just need to take a little walk. I feel like for my pile 3's, you may want to be more generous with yourself. If there is something you have been thinking about buying, buy it. If you have something you've felt would be selfish of you, be a little selfish. I think you need to spoil yourself a little more. I am hearing especially going into this new year. Life is too short not to take some risks is what I am hearing. I'm also hearing some of you need to be a little more delusional lmao. Some of yall should listen to some subliminals, this might be a little helpful in some of your situations. I also want my Pile 3s to beware of conflicts with others, I am hearing some of you could be nicer to the people around you or that you may need to work on admitting when you are in the wrong.

Advice Cards:

Control is an illusion. Surrender and allow the Universe to guide you

Align your body, mind, and spirit with your heart

Create a plan and take the first step

It's time to realize the blueprint of your soul

Be aware of your inner messages

Be adventurous. It's time to go for it!

Channeled Songs:

Pile 4 Cards: Page of Swords, Four of Pentacles, The Chariot, The Hanged Man rx, Knight of Swords, Justice rx, Nine of Swords rx, King of Swords Back of the Deck: Nine of Cups

There is a lot of swords energy for this pile! The swords has a lot to do with communication and possible conflicts in that. I think for a good amount of this pile, you guys need to work on how you communicate but mostly with how you communicate with yourself. I feel like you guys may be putting yourself down and saying things to yourself that aren't even true, and some of you even know that they aren't true. You guys need to realize that you are stopping yourself from achieving things, I don't care how many excuses you may have. Some of yall are manifesting and trying to say all the positive affirmations to bring the things you want to life, however you are forgetting that positive affirmations are only a part of manifestation. One of the most important parts is to actually put in the work to get the things you want. The things you want aren't just going to fall into your lap, you need to push yourself and try new things to get what you want, even if it seems scary at first. Like, I feel like you guys may be telling yourself things to delay taking action on your passions and it's not bringing you any closer to your goals. Which is sad because we have the Nine of Cups at the back of the deck, your dreams are a reality and can come true! For some of you I feel like it won't even be that far from you but you are delaying it! I can see the visual of you feeling like you have chains attached to your legs, these chains representing your past, family, doubts, all of it, they feel so heavy and scary. But what you don't realize is that these chains aren't holding you down at all, you have the power to push through and move forward. I am also getting for some of yall, you may have just went through a bad breakup or ended some sort of relationship, take it how it resonates. But I feel like a lot of you are holding onto this person and want some sort of closure from them, and spirit is saying that there just isn't going to be some closure, at least on their end. Sometimes we meet people, and they break our hearts and some people don't have the emotional maturity to deal with it in the rights ways and that person isn't you. It can feel empty and sad not to get closure on some relationships but what's stronger and harder is to know to walk away when things are getting bad. There will be people that come into your life that will treat you better, that person just wasn't that person. You guys need to remember that you are smart and wise and soooo powerful!

Advice Cards:

Hold your life from a sacred viewpoint. Witness the universal picture

The issue at hand is about reflection. What is the mirror showing you?

Put your tasks and goals in order

Something you've planted is coming to harvest. Results are forthcoming!

Boldly imagine what you can do and be

You are ready to receive your fortune. Be miracle minded!

Bring something new into your life!

Channeled Songs:

Thanks for tuning in₊‧.°.⋆🫧•˚₊‧⋆.

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cordeliawhohung · 2 months

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Soft Spot - Part 1

Simon "Ghost" Riley x fem!Reader - part thirteen of "soft spot"

taglist

someone's opening old wounds

warnings: mentions of misogynistic views against pregnant women, crude language, pretty chill overall.

wc: 5.3

There was a song Simon’s mother used to sing to him as a kid when he couldn’t sleep.

The words had gotten lost in his mind over the years, but the tune still stuck with him like it was imbued in his DNA. The notes were certainly intended to be sung by someone with a wider range than him, but the deep baritone of his humming still carried it well enough. A special kind of comforting somberness permeated the tune in a way he wasn’t sure he would ever be able to convey to anyone. Not properly, anyway. It was the bittersweet nostalgia of his childhood, full of an inexplicable pain and grief, yet still brimming with longing.

However, like most days, Simon didn’t have the necessary time to dwell on the past, no matter how much that tune haunted him. If he got distracted and overcooked the eggs again, he knew he’d be paying for it later at work when you’d eventually bombard him with text after text requesting that he bring you something actually palatable. Really, he didn’t mind doting on you, even if he had to secretly do it at work, and he knew Johnny didn’t mind being his errand boy. But being away from you, even for a short period of time, made his skin crawl, like he was only ever at ease when you were within sight.

A part of him had always been that way; attached to you in some anxious and unhealthy way. It just grew more as your due date grew closer.

“You’re humming again.”

Simon brought his attention away from cooking in order to glance over his shoulder at you. Countless months had passed since the day you found out you were pregnant, since the day you both got a first look at the life that grew inside of you. That little blip on the screen was completely unrecognizable compared to the near full grown baby boy that had your stomach swelling like a water balloon. He would come any day by that point, which only concerned Simon further that you still chose to go to work despite it. Though, he knew it was pointless to try and convince you otherwise.

“You’re awake,” Simon countered, refusing to acknowledge his less than melodic humming.

“Hard not to be when your son is playing football with my bladder,” you chuckled.

With a hand on your stomach, you slowly crept into the living room where you plopped on the couch. Any sort of movement completely exhausted you those days. Standing, sitting, walking; it had all become a chore after your front had suddenly become so much heavier than the rest of your body. The prospect of birthing your son was nice when you thought about not having to carry around that extra weight anymore, yet it was terrifying when you fully remembered you would actually have to have him.

“We’ll sign him up for the little tykes when he’s old enough,” Simon humored as he turned the stove off.

“Good,” you hummed, “he’s gotta burn off all this energy somehow.”

With a plate in each hand, Simon sauntered off to the living room where he handed you your breakfast before sitting down next to you. Forks scraped against china as you both devoured your meals in the quiet stillness of the morning. The eggs went down easy, perfectly cooked just how you liked them, but once you got to the sausage and bacon, you took one sniff and nearly spewed.

“Christ,” you muttered as you scraped them onto Simon’s plate.

“Still?” he questioned.

“I guess,” you replied sourly.

In exchange, Simon gave you half of his remaining eggs, and only chuckled a little when you ate those like you were starved. Even though the room in your stomach grew smaller, your appetite only increased. Though you hoped otherwise, you knew it was just an omen for what your son would be like when he was older. If he would turn out anything like his dad, your fridge and pantry would be empty within days of going to the market.

“You don’t have to keep comin’ into work,” Simon suddenly piped up.

Smirking, you glanced at your husband before continuing to peck away at your breakfast. “Are you saying that because you think it’ll be good for me to get some bed rest, or because you’re tired of the way Sallow and the others keep looking at me in the halls?”

“Both,” he deadpanned.

“Ah.” A breathy sigh escaped you as you placed your empty plate on your lap and leaned back against the couch. If you stayed like that much longer, you were certain you’d melt into the cushions. “I’ve only got one more day. Just a few more things to sort out, and then I won’t have to see Sallow, or any of the others, for a long time. I think I can manage.”

“Or they can get fucked and handle it without you,” he shrugged.

“There’s that, too,” you chuckled.

Once Simon finished his plate, he slipped yours out of your lap before quickly slinking back into the kitchen to wash them. With an overdramatic grunt, you pushed yourself up from the couch. Everything spun for a short moment before you steadied yourself and wandered into the kitchen behind Simon. Had your stomach not been as large and stretched as it was, you would have snuck up behind him to embrace him from his back. Instead, you opted to lean against the counter next to him.

“It’s okay to be nervous,” you assured him.

“Not nervous. Just preparing,” he excused.

“Nervously preparing?” you teased.

He gave you a look that forced you to pause, and your expression softened as he turned the water off. A gentle hand reached for his arm where you gave him a good squeeze to catch his attention once more. Brown eyes locked onto yours as his hands absentmindedly wandered to your stomach. Your son was always restless in the mornings, and the slight smile that pulled at the corner of Simon’s lips at his kicks was unmistakable.

“We’ve done all we can for now,” you said as you rested your hands over his. “We’ve got the nursery set up, and we’ve got him clothes, diapers, bottles… All there’s left to do is wait. Besides, I don’t think either of us will ever fully be ready for something like this.”

“I know,” he replied softly. “Just worried ‘bout you. You’re the one who has to do the hard work.”

Chuckling, you gave his hands a small squeeze. “I’ll be alright. Promise.”

There wasn’t much time left that morning to dwell on the intimidating prospect of the near future, no matter how much you wished you could have stood in that kitchen forever. Instead, you had to shove your growing body into the uncomfortable maternity wear that your stomach seemed to grow out of weekly. A part of you was excited to give birth just so your clothes wouldn’t feel constricting any longer, yet of course there was the obvious obstacle of actually having your son. That realization hit you about twenty times a day, if not more.

Like you had told Simon earlier, there was no use in stressing over what would come anyway, and eventually you were too busy to even think about it at all. Despite your best efforts throughout the week, there were countless stacks of paperwork for you to sort through and file, and you were almost certain someone did this to you on purpose. Someone out there was certainly attempting to keep you chained there longer than you wanted to be, and you were half tempted to take Simon’s advice of fuck it and let them deal with it.

When noon rolled around and your stomach started growling, you were approached by your guardian angel. Or, at least that’s what you started calling Johnny those days. Apparently he had learned about your pregnancy pretty early on, not that you really minded. Johnny proved time and time again that he was worth keeping around, as you weren’t quick to forget the days during Simon’s time as prisoner. You weren’t sure you would have survived long enough if it wasn’t for him, and that was a debt you were certain you wouldn’t be able to repay anytime soon.

Once Johnny approached your desk, he looked down at you with a grin as he placed a takeout box in front of you, accompanied by the largest bottled water you had ever seen in your life. Its mouthwatering scent wafted over to you, and you wasted no time sliding the box closer to you with unapologetic hunger.

“Got sent on another errand?” you teased.

“Nah, I did this of my own volition this time,” Johnny smiled.

Flipping open the takeout box, you were met with one of the most greasy meals you had ever laid your eyes on. Certainly not at all the healthiest thing for you to eat, but those days you craved anything high in calories. You were certain you could have the meal finished in a few minutes tops, and if you were lucky you wouldn’t even get heartburn afterwards.

“Figured I’d get you a treat since it’s your last day and all,” Johnny admitted as you began to dig in.

“You make it sound like you’re never going to see me again,” you joked.

“Well, I’m sure you’ll have your hands plenty full,” he said as his eyes flickered to your stomach.

“Not busy enough to where the little guy won’t be able to see his favorite uncle.”

Johnny’s grin grew wider at your comment, if that was even possible. Though he had been rather quiet about his excitement for your child, it was still obvious. The way he never seemed afraid to dote on you, always helping you at work where Simon couldn’t afford to; really, he was the closest thing to family you were able to get, and there wasn’t a day that went by that you weren’t grateful for him.

“Favorite?” he prompted as if urging you to go on about how great he was.

“Well, of course. You’ll be his only uncle, so it’s not like there’s much competition,” you teased.

Johnny raised a hand up to his chest as if you had wounded him, which only got you to giggle. Shaking your head, you quickly shoved another bite of food into your mouth before chastising him.

“Get back to work, MacTavish.”

“Yes ma’am.”

Really, there wasn’t much work for him to do that day. There never was. He wasn’t an officer, yet he still was higher rank than a majority of the soldiers that spent their workday there. More often than not, he would give Troopers busy work, help with training sessions, and on the very rare occasion, give lectures.

He had a love-hate relationship with his rank. Most would call him an extrovert, which wasn’t exactly incorrect. He enjoyed his conversation and banter just as much as the next man did. It was easier to be a part of more laid back conversation with others when he wasn’t their direct superior. However, he was never allowed to deal out punishment how he saw fit, and that was more frustrating than anything else. People being able to get away with bad things, people being able to walk around freely without a care in the world.

And there were plenty of people who needed punishment.

“Soap?”

A majority of Johnny’s day had gone by in a blur, and though he probably could have snuck off base, he had decided to stick around to work on the Sudoku puzzle in that day's paper. That was, until Loughty decided to interrupt him. Though, he had to give credit where credit was due. He had been trying to get the man to call him by his nickname for ages rather than use that Sergeant MacTavish bullshit, and it seemed like all his prompting had finally gotten through that thick skull of his.

Looking up from the puzzle, Johnny was quick to take in the man’s appearance. Loughty always dressed as if he was going to be inspected at any moment, and truly was a man who followed every rule like he would be shot on sight if not. No amount of sharp looks could hide the fact that there was an aura of pure anxiety that always seemed to exude from the guy. Perhaps that was why he was the rule follower that he was.

“What is it?” he asked as he tapped his pencil against his thigh.

The lump in Loughty’s throat was visible, and though he did his best to swallow it, the pure worry was evident on his face. Still, he steadied his hands and straightened his back before speaking.

“I think Arlo might be getting himself into trouble,” he finally admitted.

Unphased, Johnny had to hold himself back from laughing at the man as he tossed the newspaper onto the side table next to him. “When is he not?”

“No, I mean real trouble,” Loughty insisted. “As in, I think this could get him discharged, or worse.”

Somehow that didn’t surprise Johnny either. Despite Loughty’s apparent anxiety and a need to follow the rules, he had certainly made a friend that was the complete opposite of him. Still, despite his personal reservations about the man, Sallow was an annoyingly good soldier. Wicked smart, he passed every test with flying colors. His only downfall would be his own hubris.

“What’s he done now?” Johnny asked.

“We were assigned to sort away some paperwork in the archives. I think Sergeant Callaghan was just trying to get us out of his hair,” Loughty said, attempting some tone of humor. Once he realized that his words fell flat, his face hardened to something more serious. “He started going through bins that he shouldn’t, even though Callaghan told us to keep our hands off of anything but the Urzikstan archives. I guess the point is, while I was actually doing my job, he started going through the bins one by one until he came across some files marked with the location Salthouse and I guess found something about Mrs. Riley and-”

“Where is he?” Johnny cut him off.

Salthouse. Fucking Salthouse. Of course. Johnny could still recall the events of that day all too well. Everything they went through to save you. How they had to rush you off for medical after you had been shot. Then there was the utter torture that was healing. What had really haunted him the most was the pictures of you; the ones Simon had shredded. He was glad that those pictures were gone, because if Sallow had gotten his hands on them, had even gotten a glimpse of them, he wasn’t sure he would be able to hold himself back.

“That’s the problem. I’m pretty sure he’s trying to talk to Mrs. Riley about it.”

Five o’clock was so close you could nearly taste it. Your entire day was spent working double time in order to get everything prepared for your leave, and the many times you had to use the restroom didn’t help expedite things either. The dying drone of your computer shutting down was like music to your ears, and as you stood from your desk you made sure to do a quick glance over it. Everything was tidy, neat and hidden away. All that was left to do was go home.

Except it was never that easy, and really, you should have known better. That giddy smile on your face quickly vanished the moment your eyes landed on Arlo Sallow. The expression on his face was the same as it had been for the last few months as your pregnancy grew more noticeable. Some poorly hidden disdain, yet a sick humor, like he was in on a joke that you weren’t.

Over your pregnancy, you had learned something terribly heart wrenching and frustrating about being a woman; you were less than human, and especially while pregnant. Your body had changed and spent so much energy to grow your son, and yet still you were seen as nothing but a trope. An annoyance. People looked at you as if you were a freak of nature. And of course you could not talk about how excited you were to have your son lest someone complain about how they could never have kids, but if you didn’t seem enthusiastic enough then you were a bad mother before your child was even born. The double standard of it all had a dull rage bubble in the back of your skull, and it was only worse when Arlo fucking Sallow of all people had the audacity to stare at you like that, too.

“Mrs. Riley,” he greeted you with a suave he didn’t deserve to hold.

“Sallow,” you replied, your voice less than enthusiastic. “If you have any more paperwork, I suggest handing it off to someone else. Unless you don’t want it to get filed for another year or so.”

“Oh, I’m well aware of your maternity leave starting today, don’t worry,” he dismissed. “I just figured I’d stop by with the hopes you could answer a question for me.”

It took everything in you to hold back the urge to roll your eyes. There was always something so infuriatingly proper about Sallow. How he would speak so kindly and yet his words were laced with such malice you nearly choked on them.

“Shoot,” you said, already bored with whatever game he tried to play.

“I was wondering if you could tell me a little about Salthouse?”

Everything around you melted away at his words, asked so nonchalantly yet with insidious intent at the same time. Your skin ran cold, and you could feel your blood pressure skyrocket as you assessed him, trying to figure out how he could have found out about something like that. It had been ages since you had last even thought of Salthouse and everything that happened there. Why was Sallow of all people trying to dig that up?

“What the hell are you getting at?” you questioned, your voice low but sharp. You were still in the office with plenty of prying eyes. You couldn’t afford to get emotional.

“Well you see. MacTavish was going on a while ago about how you used to be some sort of intelligence agent once upon a time. Got yourself captured by Mark Sizov after helping to rescue Ghost, or whatever. But, you see, I came across some files in the archives that said differently,” he explained coolly. He quickly glanced over his shoulder as if to assess the room behind him before turning back to face you once more. “Apparently, you weren’t ever an intelligence agent, or anything of the sort. Just a regular civilian. I’m just curious as to why the Sergeant would lie about something like that.”

Sallow’s admittance of hearing Johnny’s fabricated story didn’t come as a surprise to you. The man made sure to tell you as soon as he was able to, and explained he did it in order to throw him off of your and Simon’s tail. What did concern you though, was how he managed to get that new information.

“If you’re so curious, you should probably bring it up with your CO. I don’t think I’m exactly at liberty to share classified information,” you said in an attempt to dissuade him from pushing any further.

“I figured I’d give you the chance to answer me first, actually,” he replied. “The reports I read through mentioned some… interesting photos that didn’t seem to be present with the rest of the files. Seems like someone had tampered with evidence, which would certainly get them court martialed. Or worse.”

Oh. So that’s what this was. A threat. Or more accurately, an ultimatum. You weren’t quite sure who exactly got rid of those photos of you, but if you had to guess it was almost certainly Simon, and by the look in Sallow’s eyes, he probably deduced the same thing. What he was really trying to tell you was that you would either re-live everything that happened to you in Salthouse for whatever demented joy he would get out of it, or he would formally report Simon for tampering with classified evidence.

“Would you not also get in trouble for sleuthing through files you shouldn’t have?” you countered.

“I think we can both agree that one of these transgressions is certainly worse than the other,” Sallow shrugged.

You hummed as if you actually considered his words, when really you wanted to rip him a new one. There was something so intrusive about everything he had said, and you were nearly proud of yourself for holding everything together. All it was, was another game. You were so sick and tired of playing games.

God, he really was just like Bukin.

“What do you get out of this? Truly? Does it bring you some sort of sick joy to toy with people the way you do? Because I’ll be the first to say I think everyone’s getting a little tired of your pompous attitude,” you said, teeth grinding.

“I don’t see it as toying as much as… putting people in their place,” he explained.

“Oh?” you prompted.

“It’s a good reminder that people shouldn’t get too comfortable. You obviously got too comfortable with a certain member of Task Force 141. Had you just realized you should have stayed the stupid civilian rather than some soldier’s bitch, you probably never would have found yourself in Salthouse in the first place, right? At least, that’s what it sounds like. And Ghost’s authority is a farce at best. He struts around the place like he owns everything, and everyone just gives into his bullshit as if they’re too scared to challenge him. If only they knew how he failed.”

Your teeth gritted so hard you swore one was about to shatter, yet you attempted to calm yourself by glancing away from him and gathering your thoughts. You were so fucking tired of games. Of people trying to force you to be a player when all you wanted was to be left alone.

“So you’re… running around like an angry child because you have a problem with authority?” you concluded. “Listen, Sallow, I don’t like you, and never did, but believe me when I say I’m doing you a favor right now. Drop this. Whatever crusade you’re trying to go on? You’re not ranked nearly high enough to get off scot free. I don’t think you want to see just how far Ghost’s authority stretches.”

A heavy smirk crossed Sallow’s face as he leaned forward. You didn’t realize how close the two of you had gotten to one another during your argument until you smelled his breath. It was annoyingly minty, like he kept a pack of gum hidden somewhere in his uniform.

“You don’t scare me,” he claimed.

Tilting your head to the side, you slowly blinked at him. “That’s fine. The last man who wasn’t afraid of me is dead in an orchard. Bravery doesn’t save you from consequences.”

“Sallow!”

Johnny’s voice boomed like dynamite throughout the open office, and everyone’s head perked up in a single, strong wave. You had never seen him look so angry before with eyes brimming with fire and a glare so sharp you were surprised Sallow wasn’t keeled over dead on the ground. Not even in Salthouse did he harbor such fury, as most of his expression had been saturated with concern. But not that time. That time the only expression you could read off of him was the insatiable urge to throttle Arlo Sallow.

The look of confusion that the other office workers wore quickly grew into concern the moment Johnny and Sallow started to get into it. Though you could have stayed and watched the show, an odd wave of exhaustion clung to your body. Your lovely conversation with Sallow had taken more out of you mentally and emotionally than you cared to admit, and your thoughts began to wander to slinking off back home where you could rot away in bed for the rest of the night.

While the men were distracted with their arguing — which couldn’t seem to quite reach your ears — you slipped out of the office before exiting the building. The promise of rain loomed over your head as you began your trip home. Whatever old wounds Sallow attempted to open, the memories he tried to pry from the shadowy depths of your brain, you refused to let them take you again.

Grounding yourself was easier than ever those days. Perhaps you had the months — no, years — of intensive therapy to thank for that. Or maybe it was just the bed. A mixture of fresh linen and the smell of Simon imbued in the bedsheets calmed your mind as you curled on your side and breathed the scent in. Your son began to stir with restless feet against nearly every major organ inside of your body, and even in the emptiness of the apartment you couldn’t help but laugh. Not even born yet and he was already so much like Simon; such a restless fighter.

Simon arrived home earlier than he normally did. It didn’t take him very long to find you either, as your resting form wasn’t exactly inconspicuous underneath the comforter. His body weighed down your side of the bed as he sat next to you where his hand instinctively made its way to your stomach. His hand always seemed to end up there eventually.

“You alright, sweetheart?” he asked, gently prompting you awake.

Blinking the sleep from your eyes, you sighed while you adjusted yourself in order to better look up at him. A smile flitted across your lips as you took his hand in yours where you reveled in the touch of his skin with a hum. His clothes were damp, and you could hear the faint sound of water tapping against the window.

“Right as rain,” you teased.

But Simon didn’t smile. His worry for you was nothing if not obvious, and his eyes assessed you as if he feared your body had sustained physical wounds with your argument with Sallow.

“Johnny told me about everything. Said you ran off before he was able to check on you,” he said.

“I didn’t run off,” you chuckled. “It was past five, and I wanted to go home. I certainly don’t get paid enough to listen to Sallow spew out that bullshit.”

Simon paused for a moment before tenderly asking, “What did he say to you?”

A laugh nearly escaped your throat when you thought back to everything that transpired between the two of you. Instead, you gently sat up in bed before adjusting your pillows so that you could lean against the headboard.

“He basically admitted to snooping through files he shouldn’t have. Found the archives about Salthouse, which I’d like to mention for the record, I didn’t know those existed until he brought it up. Either way, he basically made it seem like I was a meddling bitch for getting involved with you, and you’re just some power hungry officer and that both of us needed to be put in our place. He also insinuated that you had destroyed those pictures of me and that he’d try to get you court martialed for it.”

He paused. “I did destroy those pictures.”

“I figured as much,” you chuckled. “But really, I’m fine. It was more of a nuisance than anything else. When Johnny showed up I didn’t really care enough to stick around.”

Simon’s thumb brushed against the wave of your knuckles as a gentle rumble of thunder reverberated overhead. Being on the top floor of the apartment complex was nice because you didn’t have to worry about the noise anyone would make above you, but it always meant the wind and storms hit twice as hard than usual.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that. Cunt shouldn’t have had access to the archives in the first place,” he muttered.

“It’s fine. I won’t have to deal with him for a year or so anyway,” you said as you squeezed his hand.

“You won’t have to deal with him ever,” Simon corrected. “His verbal altercation with Johnny became physical. Swung at him in front of the entire front office. Cunt will probably be dishonorably discharged by the end of the week if he’s not locked up first.”

“Seriously?” you questioned. “Johnny’s not hurt, is he?”

“‘Course not.”

Still, there was something terribly satisfying about that news. As far as you could remember, that was the first time someone had wronged you and they had received justice without you or anyone else you cared about getting hurt in the process. Well, terribly hurt anyway, but you were sure Johnny didn’t mind taking a punch or two for you. The terrible nuisance that was Arlo Sallow would finally be snuffed out.

“Good,” you smiled.

“You sure you’re alright?” Simon pressed again.

Huffing, you playfully rolled your eyes. “Baby, I’m fine. Just tired. Worked my ass off filing the remainder of that bullshit paperwork.”

Your playful and lighthearted attitude seemed to finally convince him that you really were alright, and he stood from the bed with a sigh. As he stripped off his wet layers of clothing, he insisted that you lay back down for a nap before he slid into bed next to you, pulling your back close to his chest.

Another wave of thunder rattled the room as you settled into the mattress, and as usual, Simon’s hand rested on your stomach. Your child rested with you, but only for a short while before he was right back at it again using your bladder as a trampoline.

“Christ, kid, I just got comfortable,” you chuckled, though you made no attempt at getting out of bed.

“Think he can feel the thunder?” Simon wondered.

“Maybe. He’s probably trying to fight it off,” you joked.

A small chuckle left Simon, and you could feel his grin form against the back of your neck. “Atta boy.”

Soft pitter patters of rain drowned the silence of the room as the two of you laid there enjoying one another's presence. Even after everything that had happened that day, you felt remarkably fine. More than that, you felt great. You were free from work, at home with your husband, cuddling in bed without a care in the world. It was the domestic life you had always craved. The one your mother had always wished for you.

“I’m taking my paternal leave early,” Simon suddenly admitted.

You made a poor attempt at trying to look at Simon from over your shoulder, only to fail terribly and plop your head back on your pillow. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah. Best if I don’t stick around while Sallow gets investigated. Don’t really wanna leave you alone, either,” he explained.

You would have been fine alone for another few weeks until your due date, and though you could have laid there and explained that to Simon, you knew it was pointless. He had become your shadow, never wanting to leave you alone, always sewed to your side. It wasn’t like you could pretend to fully enjoy your time if he wasn’t there with you, anyways.

“You’re not worried about anyone putting any pieces together?” you asked.

He shrugged. “Don’t care about what they think. Just care about you.”

Smirking, you snuggled back into his chest. “Are you gonna thank Sallow for giving you a good excuse to stay home?”

Simon chuckled sourly behind you, his breath hot on your neck. His laugh was infectious, and you crooned as he squeezed you tight.

“Never in a million fuckin’ years.”

#simon riley x reader #ghost x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #soft spot #f!reader

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yaekiss · 9 months

Note

#Mailroom Open!- Hello, I would like to request a love letter for Alhaitham. NSFW and Yandere response please, and any pet names work but if you could use Habib that would be great 💖 (I hope I did this right)

_______________________

"To my favorite feeble scholar,

I hope this letter is finding you well! I have arrived safely in Fontaine and haven't known a moment of peace since I have arrived. The chaotic cocktail of getting settled into a new city, preparing for this research project, and missing home makes me yearn for the simpler times spent in Sumeru.

Especially my time spent with you.

Thats enough of my lamenting, how fare things with you back home? Have you finally shaken the title of acting Grand Sage yet? Is Kaveh being too much of a "menace"? (Also, please let him know his mother says hello and sends her best wishes to you both). Regardless, I hope you are taking care yourself. Archons know I can't ensure you are eating well while I'm nations away. I will just have to trust that you are treating yourself with the same kindness I would extend to you.

On the topic of kindness, I have a gift for you attached to this letter. I know while I am here doing my research for the next six months we won't be able to have our usual meetings at Lambad's to discuss books over good food, but I hope these books will entertain you well during my absence.

I'm eagerly counting down the days until I can see you again. I find myself thinking of you often and it is a truly vexing experience to see you on whim like I would do so before. It makes the days seem to drag on even longer, but I pray time will fly by regardless of this.

-Sincerely, your wayward scholar

[In a simply decorated box, there are three books: one is on the topic on Fontaine's hydro transportation system and infrastructure, the second is about the complexities surrounding Fontaine's judicial system, and lastly is an infamous and popular erotica anthology from Fontaine (think the Karma sutra but French)]

꩜ Letter Content: Dom! GN! Reader x Yan! Sub! Alhaitham, Alhaitham calls you "habib", lightly implied abuse of power, unhealthy possessive and obsessive relationship from Alhaitham, mentions of sex toys, lmk if I missed out anything ! ꩜ Delivery Notes: He tipped me extra and requested me to be extra careful with the delivery so I'll hand it over to you directly instead of leaving it at your door as per usual procedure! ꩜ Wanna write a love letter yourself? Check out it out here!

There’s a knock at your door when you’re relaxing in your room, opening it shows a hotel staff member who passes you a delivery. And it doesn’t take a genius to know it’s from your beloved feeble scholar.

Alhaitham sends you a simple package, nothing too gaudy or showy, just a few accents of turquoise to denote who the sender is. It’s secure and durable, perfect for weathering long and bumpy trips.

When you open up the package, you find a few gifts he carefully arranged so that nothing would be broken if the contents were jostled around a little too hard. Gingerly, you lift out a lacquered box which reveals a set of headphones and a music player that’s almost identical to the one he owns. It rests in its cushioned groove in the box with the colours of the device matching your favourites instead of the shades of green on his set.

There’s a small note attached to the music player, “In case you ever miss me too much, you’ll have my voice as background noise for your moping, habib.” On the back of it, he’s written something akin to a track list. Flicking through the different audio files for a quick sample, you realise there’s one for every mood. Tracks with words of encouragement (...or as encouraging as someone like Alhaitham can get), ones scolding you for overworking. There’s even a really cute one where he softly hums a love song that both of you adore, his voice low and soothing. However, the best track of all might be the one where you get to hear his grunts and moans, as if he were right next to your ear in person. The sounds are so sinful and wet, you could just picture him grinding on his dildo, trying to reach his peak. And the way he pitifully breaths out a “I c-can’t cum witho- AH! -without you!” has you yearning for him yet again.

Taking the headphones off before you get too carried away, you retrieve his letter in the package. The envelope is the one from his Grand Sage office, not that he ever really uses them for work purposes. Inside it, his reply is written on parchment, the kind that’s provided for him due to his high position once again. His handwriting is as tidy as ever, the font and formatting standardised throughout the letter. His reply reads:

“Reply for: My springtime sublimity,

I was wondering when you were going to write back to me. After all, there’s no way you would’ve forgotten me in the midst of your research or from meeting someone new, right? Regardless, you have not left my mind since your departure and I’m sure it’s the same for you too habib.

Do let me know if the gifts are to your liking. I’ve managed to recreate my headphones and they will definitely be useful in blocking out anyone else who might be getting on your nerves or when you’re trying to focus on your research. I included my latest read in the package as well. I'd like for us to discuss our thoughts on the book, even if it’ll have to be done over pen and paper. I’m eager to hear your thoughts on it.

There’s also no reason for me to answer whether I’ve managed to resign from my title as Grand Sage, as evident from the envelope and parchment used. I simply have an unfortunate one last thing to wrap up before I can do so.

Moving on, habib, you know Kaveh is always a menace. I relayed his mother’s well wishes to him earlier and he just smiled. Now he’s locked himself in his room. I never have any idea what’s in that mind of his. It’ll be a miracle if I don’t have to drag him out before he starves. Although I must ask, since when were you privy to Kaveh’s background? I don’t recall him bringing it up around us. Habib, just how close are you to him? How close has he gotten to you? Do write back to me and explain.

Now, this is where I must thank you for your gifts. They all have proven to be succinct and informative. However, I must comment on the choice of one of the books. My, I knew you were lewd before, but to send me an erotica anthology habib? Though, I never said I minded it. I am simply inspired, that's all. Perhaps, you should come back sooner and we can try some of the positions referenced in it. In the meantime, habib, I can only pleasure myself with toys, although, they’re nothing in comparison to you. I’m addicted to you, the caress of your hands on my skin, how only you can make me shudder and cry out your name. You have me wrapped around your finger.

I crave you desperately, habib. There are so many words I could use to describe you with my extensive vocabulary, but the most fitting one would be blossoming. You’ve managed to sow all these emotions in me and now that they’re blooming, you’ll take responsibility right? I’ve always been logical but the degree of affection I feel for you is irregular, all-encompassing and ever-growing. Almost as if you’re twisting the very essence of my mind, rotting and changing me from the inside out. It matches in a way, spring being the season of rebirth.

This letter has gotten too long, I will end it off here habib. I trust you will stay safe and return in one piece unharmed. I await your reply.

May your days be peaceful,

- Alhaitham -”

Setting his letter back in the package, you pick up the book he entrusted to you. Flipping through the pages, it’s littered with markings and annotations from the scribe, he even wrote some questions for you to ponder over. “What do you think about this point?” “Why would the author write this in?” But there are a few unrelated… unsettling annotations that you probably shouldn’t dwell on for too long such as, “Do you know just how much I miss you?” or “How were you able to corrupt my reason and rationality to this extent?” These annotations were left in here for a reason, Alhaitham is a smart man, a renowned member of the Haravatat. There’s a message behind his carefully selected words, waiting for you to unearth it before it festers and decays into something even worse.

Lastly, written neatly on the inside of the back cover, is a puzzling riddle, each word written in a different ancient script. After deciphering the question, an unpleasant awareness worms its way into your mind.

It reads, “Would you still extend your same kindness to me after realising what I would do for you?”

Thanks for reading! Consider supporting me on kofi if you enjoyed this or check out my other works hehe ♡

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jeonverselol · 2 years

Text

go ahead and cry (m) (pt 1) - jjk

a/n: this is purely a fic based on the song ‘daddy issues’ by the neighbourhood - probably great to listen to it first

summary: jungkook has commitment issues when it came to love and you are always ready to fall in love. you two want to be loved, and you’re ready to attach yourself but that’s what scares jungkook and he finally confronts all his fears.

genre: smut, angst | friends to lovers au | fratboy!kook x reader

word count: 3.6k

warnings: daddy issues lol, unprotected sex (don’t ever do that pls), cunnilingus, unhealthy coping mechanisms, squirting, overstimulation, fingering, public sex (sort of), exhibitionist kink (if you squint), praising, desperate kook, needy kook, jealousy, insecurities, crying scenes, emotional outbursts

take you like a drug, i taste you on my tongue, you ask me what i'm thinking about, i tell you that i'm thinking about

“fuck, that feels so good,” you moaned out loud when jungkook’s tongue flicks your bud. he has been eating you out for an hour since he came over. his earlier text to you was a bit vague, just a “can i come over, need to talk.” you didn’t think much about it before replying a curt ‘sure’ and about half an hour later he pulled up, dressed up black jeans and a t-shirt inside and a jacket over it - he probably was out somewhere; and his face tells you he’s been drinking.

when you opened the door, he did not try to hide the fact that he was undressing you with his eyes the moment he saw you in your tank top and shorts, the breeze filled the silence of the night, hardening your nipples in an instant, buds peeking through the cotton fabric. “what did you wanna talk ab-“ your sentence was cut off with him lunging towards you and picking you up, foot closing the door before pinning you against it.

“need you first,” there was a sense of plea in his voice, something you can’t quite place. it wasn’t unusual for jungkook to come over to yours whenever he wanted. you wouldn’t call yourself fuck buddies, and friends with benefits might be the closest label but then again you two had never hooked up that much to reap much benefits to call it so. it all happened spontaneously, like right now.

it started about 8 months ago, with a drunken kiss. you and jungkook had always been friends since the start of university, hanging out with the same group of friends but probably not extremely close to be called best friends, but close friends, nonetheless. it was during a truth or dare game in a frat party that jungkook admitted you were the hottest person in the party, and during a little tour in his room your lips met his and never felt like leaving. fast forward a month later he had you alone in his room again, attempts of a movie right gone futile when a full-blown fucking session occurred the whole night. after that incident, the two of you never made the attempt to establish anything but have repeated the incident a handful of times, no explanation, just spontaneously.

which is what led you to your thighs spread out hanging on his shoulders right now. “oh my god, that feels so fucking good,” your eyes rolled back as he started to insert his tongue into your folds. you must have came about four times already because you were extra sensitive. “could eat this pussy all day.” he drove in like starved man, tongue darting in and out of your walls. he was still fully clothed and you were stark naked, something about it made you feel timid yet you loved the power play that ensued. he started to suck your clit and your whimpers became screams as you buck your hips to his face. “come on give me what i want baby, cum on my tongue again.” he was groaning at this point. he seemed angry for some reason, but also desperate.

“yes yes yes like that kook,” your palms went to your bare breasts to tug your nipples, adding to the stimulation and the waves your shock your lower half is going to get. he inserted two fingers into your sensitive folds, curling his fingertips upwards in a come-hither motion. this got you spreading your legs wider than before and his free hand came to hold your thigh down. “pussy so fucking good i could cum just by having a meal here.” he never failed to hide how desperate he was for you whenever you two had these encounters. he was shamelessly grinding on the floor, seemed to be eagerly chasing his release as well. “fuck i’m cumming!” you let out a high pitched moan before coming undone on his fingers and tongue for the fifth time tonight. “mm baby doll if you keep making those sounds i’m gonna cum in my pants.”

“cum inside me baby, just slip inside,” you were sensitive but you didn’t wanna leave him hanging. “fuck you’re desperate aren’t you baby girl, i’ll give it to you, i’ll give you what you want,” he stood up and discarded every piece of clothing he had. his hard cock sprang free from his boxers and the tip was red and angry. he stroked himself a few times before aligning his tip against your entrance.

whatever you're thinking about, tell me something that i'll forget, and you might have to tell me again, it's crazy what you'll do for a friend

“you need me don’t you baby, tell me how much you need me, tell me and i’ll give it to you,” his commands were domineering but laced with desperation. jungkook needed you to constantly tell him that you needed him. “fuck me kook, fuck me hard.” you spread your legs for him, folds glistening with your essence and his saliva. you two moaned in unison as jungkook pushed himself into you. “that’s right baby, whose pussy is this hm? tell me who gives it to you good.” he was fucking into you hard and relentlessly. “yours! fuck, only you fuck me good!”

“don’t need anyone else don’t you, always so fucking good to me, the best pussy in the world,” his thumb came down and rubbed your puffy clit harsh, sending you into jolts of sensation. “so fucking good jungkook!” he lifted your leg and folded it to your chest while the other occupied itself on your clit. his dick was hitting new angles and with how sensitive you were, it was getting too much. “fuck, too sens- too sensitive,” you were writhing in his hold, tears escaping the brim of your eyes.

go ahead and cry, little girl, nobody does it like you do. i know how much it matters to you. i know that you got daddy issues

“shh, don’t cry little girl, i’m gonna make you feel so good… shh,” his thumb came up to wipe your tear away before continuing his assault on your clit. “that’s right baby, give it to me, i’ll make you feel so good, don’t move away, don’t move away from me,” he pounded into you harder and you feel your orgasm slowly building up again, this time you knew you were gonna cum harder than before. “don’t… don’t stop kook, keep going.” you relaxed in his hold once again, a sight jungkook was thriving on. “told you baby girl, shh, just trust me, i’ll give you everything, i won’t disappoint you you know me right? i won’t hurt you,” at this point you’re not sure if his words were a reflection of his desperation for you or something else but you were not going to question it.

a hard thrust from jungkook caused you to scream in ecstasy and as he pulled himself completely out you as you were gushing onto him. “that’s right! fuck yeah you’re a sin baby, my angel baby,” jungkook was always an oxymoron, he loved things that were bad for him and when something good happens he thinks something might be wrong – exhibit A right now.

and if you were my little girl, i'd do whatever i could do, i'd run away and hide with you, i know that you got daddy issues, and i do too

he pushed himself back in and with a few thrusts, you felt spurts of hot liquid coating your walls and his face rested on the crook of your neck. after seconds, he slowly pulled out of you and before you could open your mouth, he went towards the pile of his clothes. you were about to be disappointed, thinking he was going to leave but he fished out a box of cigarettes and a lighter. he brought one to his lips before lighting it up, taking a long drag. he put on his boxers and darted to the balcony of your room, sitting on the rattan chair you just bought a few days ago. silence ensued the room.

i tried to write your name in the rain, but the rain never came, so i made with the sun, the shade

you were used to jungkook being like this. he was always unreadable but then it was very obvious if something was bothering him. you opted to put his shirt on and head out to see him, hoping to get some words from him. as you came out, jungkook’s eyes darted towards you, mouth agape as he sees you in his shirt, a soft smile etched to his lips and you mirror this.

he tugs your arm and you sit on his lap. his smile fades as he takes his next drag, before sending you into a coughing fit. he hears this and immediately presses the bud on the floor. “sorry i’ll clean that later. and i’m sorry, i know you hate the smell of it.” he soothes your arms and brings you closer to him.

always comes at the worst time, you ask me what i'm thinking about, i tell you that i'm thinking about

“it’s okay. what are you thinking about?” you ask him, and he knows you’re seeking for a proper answer. he sighs. “just about everything, you know how it is.” at this point he was trying to divert the issue, forgetting that he came here to talk about it in the first place.

“you can tell me anything, you know that right?” you gave him a kiss in the cheek for reassurance. you knew something’s bothering him, in fact something had always been bothering him since the first time you two met. he was a hard book to read, but easy person to help. even though you knew you and jungkook were friends – more than friends less than lovers, you could see through him. it took you some time to realise his love language was words of affirmation.

“you’re gonna tell me what’s bothering you baby,” he darts his eyes to you, you never called him endearing names outside of bed. your eyes were telling him something, and he thinks he’s read you enough to know that you’re not gonna leave him in times of despair. “i’ll be here to help you get through it.” he looks to the front, his arms circling your waist to bring you closer to his chest. “i don’t know y/n, is there something wrong with me? i’m constantly afraid.” he didn’t even need to spell it out for you, you knew where this was going.

whatever you're thinking about, tell me something that i'll forget, and you might have to tell me again, it's crazy what you'll do for a friend

there was no denying that jungkook had a reputation, one that probably would not sit well with parents who would want to protect their daughters from harm’s way. while jungkook isn’t necessarily harm’s way, he isn’t the best person to be with either. he’s tried out relationships but it’s never worked out. he’d chicken out and either ghost the poor girl or just let himself engross in the life of no strings attached, when he clearly wants his strings attached. he’s stuck in a limbo, knowing that he has issues of commitment yet desperately wants to pour out his all for only one person. his biggest fear is that they would leave him, considering he’s made a mess of himself and his life, and he is not even sure whether he’s going to feel content with anyone. he wants stability but is afraid to give it. he wants eternal love but is scared of commitment. he wants to give someone his all but is afraid of them taking it and leaving halfway because he’s too much to handle. you knew where his fear stemmed from, and it’s no denying that it was hard to get him to overcome it. in recent times, he’s began to embrace that he has strong feelings for you but kept building this invisible wall inside him.

“you just know how it is baby,” his voice was timid, and you felt the urge to tell him it’s okay, it’s alright, it’s not going to happen to you – what came out was just a sigh from you, and you hugged him, fully enveloping your arms around him, planting a kiss on his head.

go ahead and cry, little girl, nobody does it like you do, i know how much it matters to you, i know that you got daddy issues

“you need to know that nothing’s gonna happen to you once you open your heart up kook,” your voice was soft. you traced your finger around his tattooed arm and his biceps flexed. “i want to,” his statement sounded like a plea, almost saying i want to give you the world, but don’t hurt me. ironically, his reputation of a fuckboy was the unhealthiest coping mechanism of his fear of monogamy, to hide his fear of loving and not loved back in the same magnitude. but you were not going to feed that into his thoughts anymore. “you know i love you don’t you kook?” you stated, whispering into the crown of his head. it was as clear as day that the two of you had feelings for one another, feelings that go beyond the bedroom but you knew that he was never gonna let his guard down.

“i love you, so much, y/n.” this time, you could feel him tearing up but you didn’t budge. you let him. “i want to give you everything, i want to always protect you; i will do everything i can to make you happy,” his voiced strained, almost as if he had been choking in his words for some time. “i’ll give you my all, i want to just… fuck, i’ll do everything you want me to, just…” this time he looked up at you, and your heart clenched at the sight of his tearful eyes. you felt yourself tear up too.

he knew you wanted him; he knew you wanted stability. the moment he saw you crying one night after getting dumped by your ex, you poured your heart out to him, detailing how you only wanted to be cared for, but your ex felt that you were ‘high maintenance’ and that you were demanding. all you wanted was to be loved. you overworked yourself most of the time, you had a family to care for, you were mentally exhausted all the time and your only escape was hoping that someone would love you the way you loved everyone and sacrificed yourself for everyone. you were the type to seek solace in your significant other, that was your coping mechanism and possible happy place, and jungkook knew that. he wanted to give you that.

and if you were my little girl, i'd do whatever i could do, i'd run away and hide with you, i know that you got daddy issues

his love for you soon grew into desperation. there were many times that he wanted to tell you that he would be on his knees for you if you wanted him to. he was yours for a long time, but to get you to be his, he was fearful. fearful that he would disappoint you, and that would mean a lifelong of regret for him. he wanted to give you the life you wanted, but he hated the anxiety within him. he was just as fearful as you.

he tried forgetting you, forgoing the idea of pursuing anything romantic with you but you were like a drug to him. you became the air he breathed in, the warmth of your body became his home, the sound of your voice became his sound of comfort.

i keep on trying to let you go, i'm dying to let you know, how i'm getting on, i didn't cry when you left at first, but now that you're dead it hurts

he tried distancing himself, ghosted you for two weeks. he thought he made progress but he couldn’t handle the sight of other men around you. he just knew that they were not able to love you as much as he loved you. you needed to know that you needed him and him only, forget everyone else. and who was he to deny the fact that he needed you? he was down bad. in a drunken fit at one of the frat parties, he remembered lunging across the living room floor just to yank you away from this guy who seemed to be new, because everyone knew you were off limits – even though you weren’t his girlfriend. he was toxic like that. the poor boy was trying his luck for sure but to no avail. at least he didn’t get punched in the face by jungkook just like another guy did two months ago.

“get your hands off of my girl,” he hissed at the guy before dragging you away, heading upwards to his room. you tried to pry your hands off of him but his grip was strong, jaw clenched and you knew he was seething. “what the fuck jungkook?”

it wasn’t the first time jungkook displayed his jealousy and became territorial in public. deep down he was insecure, afraid you might find what you wanted in someone else because he wasn’t able to give it to you at that moment. he told himself in due time he would let his insecurities go but time seemed to be ticking and his insides were tumbling with fear every time anyone attempted to hit on you. he couldn’t do it yet - commitment; but one thing for sure was he needed you. if he couldn’t convince you about that yet, the least he could do is scare everyone else away. he knew it was selfish of him, an unhealthy obsession if you will. but he was too scared to love you, and he was even more scared that you will never measure up to his love for you. he needed love, so badly.

he slammed the door shut before throwing you on the bed and climbing onto you. his breath reeked of alcohol and cigarettes. he held your jaw tightly before inching is face closer to yours. “i don’t like you being near other men.” his eyes were dark and raging, but if you looked longer, it falters into sadness and pure pain.

“you’re not my boyfriend,” that was the first time you said it and he felt a pang in his heart. it was a sensitive topic for both of you and you knew it but it had to be said. “i’ll show you who i am to you by the end of the night,” he dived straight into your lips and that was the first time he made love to you, and needless to say, you knew who he was to you. he was yours, and you were his.

this time i gotta know, where did my daddy go? i'm not entirely here, half of me has disappeared

fast forward to the current situation, the two of you met each other’s tearful gazes and he can’t help but inch forward to kiss you.

“please let me be yours,” he pleaded in between kisses. “you always have been, kook,” the kisses became fiercer, and your bodies moulded together as you melt into each other.

“i love you so fucking much, i don’t want it to be like this anymore.” he was determined this time to show you he was going to commit. you knew it was hard for him, considering he grew up idolising his dad and the love his dad showed his mother, until one day he came home and saw her crying for the first time – his dad no where to be seen, just a single ‘i’m sorry’ carved into a torn up paper, held down by a paperweight made from several books. that was the last memory he had of him.

that was the first time jungkook felt what heartbreak was and he never recovered from it. that was the first time he feared loving someone and being loved. he never wanted to feel what his mother felt, and feared the ability to hurt someone like how his dad did.

go ahead and cry, little boy, you know that your daddy did too, you know what your mama went through, you gotta let it out soon, just let it out

“show me how much you love me jungkook, right here,” the balcony was dark, the view in front of you only showed the city street lights. there was barely anyone at this hour, not to mention you lived in the 10th floor. “i’ll show you baby, fuck i’ll show you everything.” his fingers grazed down to your uncovered folds, which was already dripping in essence. the two of you were insatiable when the chance arose and this time was no exception.

he played with your clit, rubbing in slow and fast motions. you instinctively spread out your legs and he inserted two fingers in, lips still attached to yours. “fuck, so fucking good,” you moaned and his boxers started to feel tight.

“sit on me baby,” he lowered his boxers a little, spread his thighs further on your rattan armchair and took out his hard cock. you faced him this time, eagerly sliding into him with ease, and started to bounce on him. “that’s right baby girl, show everyone who you belong to, who’s the only one that makes you feel this good.”

you stifled your moans by hiding your face in the crook of his neck, your arms wrapped out him as you continued to bounce on him. he left wet kisses on your shoulders before he started to piston his hips upwards, fucking you just as much you were fucking him. he brought his thumb over to your clit and you felt your orgasm building up. “gonna cum baby,” you whined and jungkook increased his pace. moments later, your walls started to contract from the stimulation as your orgasm washes over you. jungkook unloads into you before kissing your neck.

“i love you so much.” he looks into your eyes. “i want this, please,” his tears pooling in his eyes again, his brown irises shaking behind the liquid barrier. “i want this so much, forever,” the fear slowly escaped his eyes in the form of tear droplets. “forever, always, don’t leave me.”

go ahead and cry, little girl, nobody does it like you do, i know how much it matters to you, i know that you got daddy issues

“i love you too, so much,” you nodded and mirrored his expressions. “forever and always, together,” and for the first time ever, he felt that spark of reassurance that what you said was true, and he finally let you in. and you found solace in the place you craved for, his heart.

and if you were my little girl, i'd do whatever i could do, i'd run away and hide with you, i know that you got daddy issues, and i do too

if you were my little girl, i'd do whatever i could do, i'd run away and hide with you, i know that you got daddy issues, and i do too

a/n: okay this was sad but good to write

read the sequel right here: part 2 !

#bts smut #bts scenarios #bts fics #bts fanfics #jungkook smut #jungkook #jeon jungkook #kpop smut #kpop fic #bts fic #bts au #bts scenario #jjk smut #jjk #jk #bts #bangtan #bangtan boys #bangtan sonyeondan

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elsa-fogen · 2 months

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Oh, Husk and Alastor?

Their dynamic is also pretty interesting, they kinda feel like two people who everyone thinks gets along great and are the best of friends. While in reality their friendship is fueled but a fire born from their hatred. They just have many decent moments and have a easy time understanding each other, through they often use that information to serve a selfish endeavor.

Like Alastor would mess with Husk, tease him and Husk would tell Al to get his act together so that he(Husk) doesn't have to deal with some sort of fallout (ref. when Mimzy comes by)

In general, I feel like they do get along really well, but they are in no way friends. Kinda like how you can get along well with your boss, but wouldn't really consider them a friend. And you wouldn't really want them to involve themselves in your life, but that doesn't stop Alastor. (Social conversions? What's that)

This also makes me curious, wonder what kind of dynamic Husk has with Rosie, or rather, how do you think Rosie sees Husk? Just like a pet Alastor has? Or does she actually see the person that is there? (Leaning more towards her not really seeing Husk more than a errand boy or pet of Alastor)

Though it would be fun if the first time Husk meet Rosie he thought that she might actually be willing to help him because she gives of the energy of being a very kind person around people she cares about (aka Alastor). So he tries to talk to her without Alastor present and he finally understands how they get along so well, they are both the same kind of crazy ᵔᵜᵔ

So, um- what are your thoughts on the dynamic between Alastor and Husk?

HEEEHEHHE YOU GOT ME A REASON TO TALK ABOUT MY FRESH HEADCANON ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIPS

OKAY SO!!

I saw a theory that Husk had children when he was alive. Keep that in mind, it's a secret tool we wanna use later

So, little bit about Alastor. He is not the guy who owns many souls. In fact, he doesn't own any (well... i have some headcanons, but it's for another time). The only soul he has is Niffty, and she's... she's whole another level.

So one day Alastor get's Husk's soul in posession and he has no idea what to do with him. Their contract is basically "you'll have to do anything i order you" but it doesn't set any boundaries for Husk. So he can insult Alastor, argue with him and so on. The only thing he cant is to try to kill Alastor, but it's obvious.

So, Alastor's just... drags him around, and Husk has to just be there all the time, and watch Alastor do stupid shit without thinking, being manipulated by Mimzy into some shenanigans and so on, because he's too powerful, kinda don't afraid of anything and little bit unhinged. And Husk is trying to be that voice of sanity for Alastor (and maybe Niffty). Like in canon, he tries to warn Alastor about Mimzy nd at some point seems genuinely worried about him. Just a bit. And also, in that scene in final song, when Alastor appears again, Husk doesn't seem happy but still goes for group hug.

I think he sees Alastor as a child he has to babysit, but the child is so spoiled, that he doesn't give a shit about his warnings. Maybe Al reminds him of his own children at some degree. And so Husk is attached to Alastor in some weird unhealthy way, he cares about him and tries to protect, even if it pointless.

The worst part of it is that Alastor doesn't see him more than funny fluffy cat-guy-pet. He almost never takes him seriously and doesn't listen to what he says. So Husk may try to reach out to Rosie, to make her to reason with Alastor. But she's basiclly "i could fix him, but whatever is wrong with him is way funnier". I think she listens to Husk's worries about another Alastor's scheme, but she also trusts Alastor? I mean, she belives that he'll be fine. But if something seems to dangerous, she can agree and talk to Alastor.

After all, Husk was an overlord, and i think Rosie could know him before he made a deal with Alastor. So, i think she doesn't think of Husk as just Al's pet, she knows who he is. After all, not every sinner can become an overlord. But still,

So, last thing. I saw that one comic where after episode 5 Alastor admits that Husk was right about Mimzy and i really love this thought. I think Alastor also likes Husk's presence at some degree. Maybe they could build something healtier, maybe Alastor, after losing part of his powers, would listen to Husk more. But still it's all fucked up while Alastor owns his soul.

And also, i'd really love to see something of just Alastor, Husk and Niffty getting into some shenanigans together, this would be so much fun. Al and Niff who are just 2 unhinged gremlins and Husk who's done with their shit, but still cares about them and can't just leave, and it's not because of the deal. Like i imagine when husk is trying to reason with Alastor that he's about do something stupid and dangerous and Alastor's like well i don't force you to follow us this time, but Husk still goes with them because who else would watch after these two idiots?

So i think, i get your point about them!

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javipispunk · 15 days

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Bush of Rhododendron Flowers

Jackson! Joel Miller x f!reader

Summary: In the language of flowers, the rhododendron symbolizes danger and to beware. Fitting plants for the meanest man in Jackson to have in his front yard. You wish you had listened to their warning, too late for that now.

Word count: 1.2k

Rating: Explicit. MDNI

Warnings: Joel and Ellie never go to Salt Lake, Allusions to smut, angst, Joel is mean and a liar and a little rough, manipulation by Joel and reader, self-loathing, self-sabotage, unrequited want, unhealthy attachment, one use of the word ‘darlin’, NO HAPPY ENDING

A/N: The second I saw @morallyinept May challenge I knew I had to write about Joel and Rhododendrons. The Language of Flowers by Vanessa Diffenbaugh has lived in my mind rent free since I read it for the first time over a decade ago, so heavy inspo from that. Also the song Rhododendron by Bella White played a large role in the making of this fic. Highly recommend both! Divider by the ever lovely @saradika-graphics

masterlist

You sit on your front porch and stare holes into the pink flowers in Joel Miller’s yard that mock you. Spring has arrived and made itself a home in Jackson. Flowers are blooming and cover the landscape like flecks of paint on a canvas. The sun is bright and birdsong echoes in the crisp air, a soundtrack to the movie that plays over in your mind.

Beware, beware, beware, the rhododendron chants at you.

You think back to the first time you met Joel. It was mid-Winter and the earth was covered in a thick blanket of snow. You’d been walking down the street when you heard a bellowing yell. Everyone that was around turned their heads towards the man that had yelled Tommy Miller's name. You’d never seen him before and Lord was he a sight for sore eyes. His graying hair was a mess on the top of his head and his denim clad legs looked sturdy underneath him. If he wasn’t in the middle of a reunion with his brother you would have gone up to talk to him right then and there.

Your opportunity to talk to him came a few days later when you both walked out of your houses at the same time, he had recently moved in across from you. You’d heard rumors that he was gruff and brash, but that didn’t deter you, in fact it only made you want him more. Something about the chase and all that. He didn’t acknowledge you on this particular morning, not even a glance in your direction, so you mirrored his actions.

It happened a few more times, both of you turning onto the street at the same time before he finally accepted that he would be seeing you often. One day he cleared his throat loudly, causing you to turn your head towards him. He gave you a curt nod, you replied by looking him up and down and nodding back at him. A truce of some sort, still neither of you had spoken a word to each other.

/ / /

It continued on like that for a while until you went a few days without seeing him. You’d become weirdly attached to your ritual and his absence worried you, you would later come to find out he’d been injured pretty bad on patrol and was instructed to take it easy. The first time you saw him again after that you decided to finally talk to him.

When he gave his signature nod you spoke up. “Was beginning to wonder if you died or somethin’.”

He froze, obviously caught off guard by your disruption of the routine he had become comfortable with. Then he ran his fingers over his chin and really looked at you.

“Got pretty damn close.” He mumbled and started walking away. Usually he was a few paces ahead of you but with whatever injury he’d sustained he was walking slower than normal. This meant that you were now walking side by side, much to your amusement and his dismay.

“Care to enlighten me?”

“No.” was all he said, unsurprisingly. You chuckled and that was the end of that.

/ / /

It all came to head when you were sitting at the Tipsy Bison. It had been one of those days and you just needed some relief. Like every other time he saw you outside of your shared morning walk he pretended like you didn’t exist. You’d had enough of it and at this point it didn’t matter if you wanted to kiss him or not, he was just being plain annoying. So you walked up behind him and whispered in his ear.

“It’s not very neighborly for you to not say hi to me Joel Miller. I thought we had a nice little thing goin’ on with our walks there.” You didn’t wait for him to reply and swiftly walked away out the door into the cool night. Barely three steps out the door you felt a firm grip on your arm pulling you around the side of the building. Hook, line and sinker.

Joel grabbed your face in his large hand and made you look at him, square in the eye.

“Neighborly huh? I ‘ont think thats what your wantin’ outta me darlin’”

You winked at him and his lips were on yours in an instant. He was rough with you, biting and pulling your lips with his teeth, like a wolf devouring a deer. And just like a deer you were caught in the headlights, not sure which direction you should go. You let him take the lead, willingly pliant under his touch. It was too cold outside to take any items of clothing off so you stopped there and he walked you back to your house.

When you got back you could tell he wasn’t sure if you wanted him to follow you inside. You bit your lip and looked at him seductively, eyes hazy with lust.

“Well? You just gonna leave me out to dry like that?” you said. He hurriedly followed you inside and your clothes had been shed before the door was even fully closed.

/ / /

That was the beginning of the end really. Once you’d had a taste of Joel you needed more, you were insatiable. The more you sought him out the more withdrawn he became. It was on and off for nearly three months, secret rendezvous between weeks of avoidance. When he was with you he was so sweet, he took the time to clean you up and would whisper sweet nothings in your ear. But in the in between times you were insignificant to him. He even started leaving his house an hour early, just so he wouldn’t have to see you.

/ / /

You’d asked him about it on one of those rare occasions you found him in your bed.

“I’m sorry darlin’, just busy.”

You knew he wasn’t sorry and you knew he wasn’t more busy than he usually was. And he knew that you knew but that was the end of the questioning.

As Spring came, feelings changed. You were more irritable than ever with his back and forth. You couldn’t tell what was truth and what was a lie. One moment he was saying he wanted to settle down with you, the next he was saying he had rotten luck with that kind of stuff so he didn’t even wanna bother trying. There were lots of empty sorry’s passed between you two those last few weeks. You wanted it to end, but you never wanted him to leave.

/ / /

Right now as you sit on your porch, coffee long forgotten on the stoop next to you, you know it’s over for good. Just a little while ago you watched him walk out of his house with a pretty blonde woman. He gave her a kiss and a pat on the behind. Her giggle was like a blood curdling scream to your ears.

Your heart is sitting in a million little unfixable pieces at the bottom of your abdomen, the wreckage of a ship left to rot on the sea floor. You brought it upon yourself, you know that, holding onto someone that never really wanted to be there in the first place. How horrible to grieve someone who is still alive.

Beware, beware, beware, the bush of rhododendron flowers continues to stare back at you.

#joel miller x f!reader #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x you #the last of us fanfiction #jettsflora&faunachallenge #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x reader

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bitterpotionn · 8 months

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Johnny Slaughter - Thoroughfare

This is kind of a long one. I based a lot of elements on my favorite Ethel Cain song, Thoroughfare. Listen to her album, Preachers Daughter if you ever get a chance. It's actually life-changing.

I consider this fic a bit of a prequel to "Dirt Road" but you don't have to read that one to understand this one.

As always any feedback or constructive criticism is welcome! I am so thankful for all the love on "Dirt Road", I hope you all like this one as well!

Warnings: Dub-con, unsafe sex, car sex (again), Johnny is manipulative and mean, light fluff, neck grabbing, unhealthy dynamics, smoking, name-calling, Johnny is possessive, light slapping

She walked down the near-vacant streets of an old Texas town. Her feet ached as she made her way down the cracked sidewalk. The air around her was stale and unmoving, no breeze, nothing to cool her down from the blistering heat of the Texas sun. She kept her head down, counting each of her steps. Well, she attempted to, but she always messed up around the 1000 mark and had to restart. Her brown satchel bag draped over her shoulder seemed to get heavier with each step she took.

After a while of walking, she spotted an old gas station on the outskirts of the small town. It was nothing special, only having two pumps outside, with a garage attached to the side of the shop. Only one car was at the pump, an old white pickup truck. She tried to quicken her pace, eager to reach a resting point. Once there, she entered the small shop and browsed around, looking for a cheap snack that could last her a couple of hours. She walked up to the counter and was greeted by the toothy smile of an old man.

"This it for ya hun?" he asked picking up the snickers bar she placed gently on the counter.

"Yes sir, that's all" she spoke softly. He raised an eyebrow, examining her rugged appearance. "Well that'll be 20 cents"

She gave him a nod and started rummaging through her satchel, counting out the small amount of money she had on the counter. "Here's 20..." she muttered pushing the two dimes toward him.

He gave her a frown and took the change. He rung her up, before handing her the Snickers bar he turned and grabbed a bottle of water. He pushed both items towards her. "You be safe out there alright? Dangerous out there for a young woman alone" he said giving her a small smile.

She smiled back at him, noticing his small act of kindness through the bottle of water. "Thank you sir, I'll be okay" she said simply before turning and walking out of the store, the ring of the welcome bell behind her.

Leaning against his white truck a man watched her as she walked out. His eyes narrowed as he studied her. Her clothes were dirty and worn. Her hair was unkempt. A thin layer of sweat reflected off of her skin. He bit down on his lip, feeling a small pulse in his stomach.

She didn't even notice the man as she continued down the road. Opening the Snickers bar and devouring it in a couple of bites. She took a long sip of the water, before putting the rest of it in her bag. Back to counting steps.

Behind her, she could hear the roaring of a vehicle approaching her. She paid it no mind as she continued walking. She didn't take notice until it slowed down right beside her, the passenger side window creaking open. She turned to look, noticing the white truck from the gas station. She stopped and looked into the window, where she spotted him.

He was leaning towards his passenger side window to get a better look at her. A smirk adorned his sharp features. Thick brown hair framed his face, he couldn't be much older than her. She noted a scar running down the right side of his face. He quickly snapped her out of her staring.

"Hey there, where you headin'" his accent was thick and his voice deep.

She shook her head and began walking slowly "Nowhere, I don't need a ride" she said curtly, continuing on her path. The man didn't let up though, his truck matched her speed as he continued staring at her.

"Hey now, don't run off. You look rough, you sure you don't need a ride?" he asked, the same smirk adorning his face. She couldn't quite decipher it. Sure he was handsome, but something about him felt...off.

She looked down at her aching feet, noticing small streaks of blood, she's been walking forever. A ride might be nice right? She turned back toward him and nodded "Alright"

He stopped the truck fully and put it in park, he leaned over and opened the door for her. She looked behind her, hesitating for a moment. She didn't necessarily want to just hop into a stranger's car, but she was exhausted. His truck sure did beat walking though. So without a word, she hopped into the passenger seat of his car.

"There ya go, darlin'" he said as he leaned back, looking at her intently. "So where you headin' off to all by yourself?"

"I...no where in particular. I guess I'm just tryin' getaway. Ya know?" she said turning her head to meet his intense stare. He gave her a knowing nod, all while smirking wide. "Do you live around here?" she asked.

He shook his head and leaned back a bit. "No ma'am, I guess I'm trying to get away too. I've been away from home for a while now" he started back up his truck again "If your heading nowhere in particular, you care to join me?"

"On your road to self-discovery?" she joked leaning her head back onto the seat, breathing out a sigh of relief when she was finally able to rest her head.

"Somethin' like that" he shifted the car back into gear and took off down the road. "Maybe we can find what we're searching for together hm?" he chuckled. She turned and stared at him, he was smiling. Wide.

The smooth material of the seat stuck uncomfortably to her sweaty thighs. She kept shifting every so often, trying to avoid getting a rash. The diner was lit by the warm glow of wooden pendant lights hanging above every table. At this time of night it was nearly vacant. The only other person was an older man seated on the other side of the diner at the bar, working on his fifth beer of the night.

Johnny sat across her on the other side of the worn vinyl table. He was leaned back, legs spread and eyes focused as he read over the menu. She sipped from her vanilla milkshake, staring at him. Admiring the way his eyebrows furrowed when he was thinking hard about something.

"You folks ready to order?" the voice of an older woman broke her out of her thoughts.

He grunted and set the menu down. "We'll both have the pancakes" He gave the older woman a smile and handed her the menus. She nodded and wrote down the order in her small notebook. "I'll get that in for y'all all" the old woman walked away and out of sight into the small kitchen.

Johnny crossed his arms and looked over at the girl sitting across from him. "Let me try that" he grabbed the milkshake and took a large sip of it. "Hey! I was drinkin' that" she pouted reaching her hand out to retrieve it from him.

"I'm payin' for it" he joked giving her a playful grin. He handed it back to her, the milkshake was now half gone. "Yeah yeah" she mumbled now guarding the milkshake.

They walked hand in hand out of the diner. "Thank you for payin' for dinner these last couple weeks, I really do appreciate it" she said squeezing his hand. "Don't mention it darlin' can't have you starvin' can I?" he teased reaching into his pocket, pulling out a cigarette. He lit it and blew the smoke into the air. She watched the smoke slowly get carried away by the subtle night breeze.

Once they reached his truck he leaned against the side of it, still holding her hand. She leaned against his side and sighed softly, looking up at the star-less sky. He unlaced their hands and wrapped his arm around her shoulder, keeping her close to him.

She grew to love the feeling of his arms around her. Since she's been with him, she's always felt so safe. She naively thought once or twice that she wouldn't even get a cold around him, that somehow he could prevent any threat that came her way.

"It's been a while since I felt like this ya know?" he muttered, still looking straight ahead. "Like what?" she asked, shifting her eyes to him. "Like...Like I know where I'm headin' now. With you" his eyes slowly looked down at her, a hint of nervousness laced his voice.

Her mouth parted a bit, looking up at him. After a while, she finally spoke. "I feel the same, you make me feel safe, Johnny" she gave him a smile and he chuckled. He put out his cigarette and suddenly lifted her up, leaning her against the truck. Her legs snaked around his waist, her arms hooked behind his head.

"I make you feel safe huh?" He hummed out, stroking his fingers across her back. She nodded in response. "I suppose that's right, I mean who else could protect you like I could?" he leaned forward and caught her lips in a slow, passionate kiss. She could feel his hair brush against her forehead. She melted into the kiss, savoring the taste of syrup and tobacco on his tongue.

After a few moments, he broke the kiss slowly, opening his eyes to look into hers. "You're my girl right?" he asked, an intense look in his eyes. She took notice of this look, it was almost possessive. It made a shiver go down her spine. Despite this feeling, she nodded. "I'm yours, Johnny"

He bit down on his lip and looked around, scanning the empty area of the diner parking lot. "Makin' me feel some type of way, baby" he chuckled and kissed down her neck. "Say it again" he looked at her with hooded lustful eyes.

"I'm...I'm yours, Johnny" He groaned lowly and moved his hips towards her. She could feel his hardening cock through his jeans. She leaned her forehead against his, her face heating up. He looked at her with dark eyes, his smirk growing wider. "Get in the truck"

He held her against the seat of his truck, hovering on top of her. Their lips clashed together, he tried to not break the kiss as he fumbled with his belt. Her hands wrapped around his waist pulling him closer. Once he got his belt undone, he grabbed both of her wrists, pinning them above her head. "Don't move" he muttered lifting up the hem of her shirt, exposing her breasts to the cool air. He chuckled and took one of her nipples in his mouth, sucking and nibbling on it.

Her back arched into his movements as she let out a small whine. "J-Johnny..." she muttered, her eyes wide with lust, her body trembling from his touch. "Look at you doll, you're shakin', you want it bad huh?" he snickered biting at her breast. He yanked down her shorts and reached a hand down to rub her clit, he chuckled when he felt just how wet she was.

He leaned off of her a bit and sloppily pulled out his hard cock. Her eyes widened when she noticed just how big he was. She wasn't that experienced with boys back home, especially not ones that were packing something like that.

He must have noticed her hesitation as he grabbed the base of his cock and began stroking it in front of her. "Too big, baby?" he teased, a wide grin on his lips. She shrugged and bit down on her lip. "You're not a virgin, are you?" he asked, his free hand playing with her exposed breast. She quickly shook her head "Just...one guy..." she muttered out, her voice laced with embarrassment.

"Well, aren't I lucky?" His smirk widened and he rubbed at her clit. "I'll go easy, promise" his tone was dripping in sarcasm. His words made her nervous, she knew he was quite experienced with sex. She didn't want to disappoint him.

Without warning he lined up his cock to her slit. While staring at her he plunged into her. She gasped and her eyes widened at the sudden feeling. He began thrusting steadily into her, not giving her time to fully adjust to his size. "Johnny! S-slow down a bit..." she mumbled looking into his dark eyes.

"No no baby, if you're gonna be my girl. You gotta learn how to please me, right?" his right hand held her wrists above her head, while his left wrapped around her neck lightly, keeping her in place while he thrust into her. She went silent after that, only allowing small noises to escape her. Her brows furrowed in confusion as she tried to decipher his sudden change in temperament.

His thrusts continued at a dizzying pace. He continued his hold on her, letting out small groans and chuckles as he watched her body move against him. "C'mon baby, you can be loud. Let me hear you" he said as he kissed the side of her face.

She let out a high-pitched moan when his thrusts became more sloppy, he was desperately chasing his climax. "Fuck!" he growled out. He removed his hand from her neck and began rubbing her clit, staring into her eyes, waiting for her reaction. Her mouth fell open as she moaned, feeling overwhelmed by his cock and now his fingers rubbing wildly at her clit. "Cum on my cock, darlin'. I know you can do it, c'mon" he groaned out, his thrusts becoming brutal.

She let out a loud moan that she quickly tried to muffle by burying her head in the crook of his neck. Johnny's grip on her loosened as he came deep inside her cunt. He groaned and buried his face into her hair, panting.

After a long pause, he gripped the back of her head, leaning her back so she was looking into his eyes. "You were such a good girl" he muttered peppering kisses all over her face. She let out a breathy sigh and looked up at him with tired eyes.

Once they both collected themselves and got dressed, Johnny pulled her onto his lap, his head resting against the headrest. She straddled his waist and laid her head on his chest, her eyes unfocused. Her mind couldn't avoid going back to his rough treatment. This was definitely not how she imagined their first time together. While it was good and left her shaking, her change in attitude...scared her. But he was just teaching her what he liked...he didn't mean it in a bad way, right? Her thoughts clouded her mind, filling it like a slow infection.

Johnny rubbed her back as he held her. He noticed her silence and gripped her chin, angling her head up to look into her eyes. He studied her for a bit before speaking, “Why you bein' so quiet?”

Her eyes widened a bit at his words, not expecting him to even notice. "I'm not...I'm just thinkin'..." she mumbled, leaning her head back into his chest. His chest was broad and hard. Yet, she found comfort in it.

"Thinkin' huh..." he let out a huff, placing one of his large hands on the back of her head, almost cradling her. "Why don't we get a motel room tonight? I don't think my back can handle sleepin' in this truck again" he let out an exaggerated groan as he rubbed his his shoulder.

She appreciated that he didn't pry into her feelings. She wasn't sure she could handle that right now. She let out a small laugh and nodded "That sounds nice"

Living with Johnny was...difficult. If you could call passing through cheap motels living with a person. Johnny was becoming increasingly controlling and harsh. Almost like a veil was lifted off of him once they spent more time together. She thought she knew him, as well as you could know a man who picked you up off the side of the road.

He leaned back against the headboard of the cheap mattress in their more recent motel room, smoking a cigarette. The sheets were an obnoxious faded orange. It paired nicely with the peeling yellow wallpaper. The place made her feel sick. She leaned against the open window, peering out, studying each passing car. The smoke was giving her a headache.

"C'mere" his voice was gruff, raspy. She sighed and leaned her head onto the cool glass. "I'm getting a headache, I just wanna stand here" she mumbled, avoiding his gaze.

She heard him get up quickly, she didn't have much time to react before his hand found its way around her neck. "I said c'mere" he growled out, pulling her against him. She squeezed her eyes shut and coughed slightly. "Johnny, cut it out!"

He laughed at this licking his lips. "'Cut it out' really?" he scoffed and threw her down on the bed. She quickly sat up, trying to regain some control. "You need to listen to me darlin', you're my girl right?" He stood in front of her, his hands resting on her thighs, and he bent down to meet her eye level.

"You..." she sighed "You can't keep treating me like this...bossin' me around..." she shifted her gaze to the side, avoiding his narrowed eyes. "Oh yeah?" he snickered and pulled her thighs apart more.

"Or what? You gonna leave?" He grabbed her face, squeezing her cheeks together so she was looking directly at him. "And go where, baby? Back walkin' all by yourself, half-starving? Ya know you never told me why you were all by yourself" she whimpered and tried to shake his hand off her face.

"Your my girl, right?" He glared at her and released her face. Her hand cupped her face, rubbing the now inflamed skin. Tears started running down her face. "I'm yours...Johnny" she cried and hiccupped, covering her face with both of her hands.

His glare faded as he watched her cry. "Hey...c'mon..." he sat down next to her and placed her in his lap. He laid her head on his chest and rubbed her back as she sobbed into her chest. "You know I hate when you cry, darlin'" he rocked her gently as she sobbed.

A while passed, she was still curled up in his lap as he leaned against the headboard. Smoking another cigarette. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, avoiding the smell.

His hand rubbed up and down her thigh. His lips found their way to the side of her face. Her cheeks were still red from the force of his grip. His kisses stung.

He let out a low hum as his hands traveled up her shirt. She was wearing one of his old t-shirts, it was ripped and fraying at the edges. His calloused hands squeezed at her breast, his fingers tugging at her hardening nipple.

She whined at the contact and looked up at him. He was smirking down at her, his eyes dark and determined. "You feelin' better?" he asked his hands pushing up her shirt, exposing her breasts to the cool air. She gave a slight nod.

"Good, I think you should make it up to me. Ya know for bein' difficult" he hummed out, slipping the t-shirt over her head. She shrugged a bit, tracing shapes with her finger onto his bare chest. "Speak up" he said while he continued to rub her breasts.

"I didn't mean to be difficult..." her words trailed off, her eyes shut at the continued attention to her breasts. "I just think after all I do for ya, you can help me out hm?" he hummed out. She could feel his hardening cock through his pants. She gave him another shrug.

His eyes narrowed a bit as he easily lifted her up, laying her down on her stomach. "Ass up" he said, giving her rear a rough pat. Like she was on autopilot she lifted her ass in the air, her face on the faded motel sheets. He slowly pulled down her shorts, savoring her vulnerable position.

"Phew darlin', you're leakin'" his fingers brush against her cunt, giving it a small pat. "Good enough to eat" he snickered and bent down, both of his hands spreading apart her pussy. He gave her cunt a single lick from top to bottom. This caused her to moan louder than she expected. He smirked wide at this reaction.

"I'd love to eat this pussy, darlin' but I'm hurtin'" he said unbuckling his belt, pulling out his hard cock with a hiss. Her face was still buried into the sheets as she reached back, trying to hold his hand. He grabbed her hands and put them behind her back, using one of his hands to hold them together. Without much warning, he pushed into her.

Her eyes widened, she found that she could never get used to his sheer size. He never gave her time to anyway. She wiggled her fingers as he held them behind her back, trying to signal that she wanted to touch him, he didn't even notice.

His thrusts were at a brutal pace, his right hand kept her hands in place behind her back, while his left slapped her ass periodically. Her moans were louder, she wasn't used to this position, he was hitting her deeper than ever before. Then, they both heard pounding on the wall to their left. "Quiet down perverts!" she heard a woman yell as she hit on the wall, she must have been in the room next to them.

Johnny snickered, this made him increase his pace. "Hear that baby? Everyone can hear what a slut you are ha" he was out of breath, his voice raspy. Her eyes widened and she shook her head, humiliation filling her stomach.

Then, she felt him almost completely stop, he pulled out of her. Just when she was about to look back and see what was wrong, he thrust into her again. Causing a muted scream to exit her lips. She buried her face completely into the sheets, wanting to make as little noise as possible, her cheeks burning in embarrassment.

“No no baby, I wanna hear your” he grabbed her head and lifted her face up “Let me hear you” he said as his pace quickened. She whined out and looked up at him with pleading eyes. He chuckled at this and gave her a fake pout “What? Is my girl embarrassed?”

He pulled out of her and flipped her over. “Cant hide that pretty face now can ya?” He leaned down and kissed her neck as he plunged back into her. Her back arched, pushing him even deeper into her soaking cunt.

He didn’t let up on his thrusts, his eyes focused on her face, noting every expression she made. His brows furrowed as he came close to the edge. “Fuck you’re tight” he groaned out tipping his head back.

She couldn’t help but to admire how handsome he looked. His bare chest sweaty and his hair falling into his face. Her eyes were wide with awe as she tried to memorize how he looked like this.

He gazed down at her and noticed her staring. He chuckled sheepishly and leaned down kissing her. “I’m so close, baby” he mumbled as they kissed. “You gonna cum with me darlin’, you gonna be my good girl?” He asked, his forehead resting against hers. She nodded quickly, desperate to please him.

He smirked and lifted her legs up over his shoulders, locking his arms around her knees. His head lay against her legs as he drilled into her.

She felt the familiar warm pulsing in her lower stomach. She shook as she let out one final moan, her back arching a bit off the bed. He wasn’t too far behind her as he let a small moan slip, pumping her full of his cum. “Shit!” He groaned tipping his head back.

They stayed like that for awhile, his softening cock still inside her, not letting any of the cum spill free. He finally pulled out, she let out a small whine at the sensation. Her eyes locked onto his.

He just stared at her for a while, his hands rubbing the side of her thighs. He gave her one last kiss before he got up to go shower, leaving her there on the bed.

She lay in bed as she heard the shower run, her legs were sore. Her heart felt sore too. After a while, he came out of the steamy bathroom. He had a towel wrapped around his waist, his hair dripping wet. He walked up to the bed and dropped the towel, climbing in beside her. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close. She buried her head in his chest and closed her eyes; trying to ignore his hardening cock against her thigh.

She was sitting quietly in his truck as he pumped gas. He was reading some newspaper as he waited, intently reading the pages, almost like he was looking for something.

After awhile of waiting he opened the passenger side door and smirked at her, handing her a snickers bar. Her eyes lit up a bit as she smiled at him. "Thanks Johnny! These are my favorite" he leaned in and gave her a quick kiss. "I know" he said before shutting the door.

He hopped into the driver's side door and set the newspaper to his side. She looked over and read the headline; "ANOTHER BODY FOUND, POLICE SEARCH CONTINUES" her brow furrowed and she looked back up at him. He was started the car and began driving down the road.

"Ya know darlin', I have to admit. I've been feelin' a bit homesick" he explained looking over at her, his hand finding its way to her thigh. "We've been travelin' together for a while...would you want to visit home with me?" he said 'home' as if she lived there her entire life too. Honestly, she was eager to take the next step with him. Meeting his family would be great, she wanted to make him happy after all.

She held his hand that rested on her thigh, she nodded and gave him another smile. "If that's what you want"

He hesitated a second before nodding "Yeah...that's what I want"

#johnny slaughter #texas chainsaw massacre #johnny slaughter x reader #tcm game #tcm #smut #johnny slaughter smut #johnny tcm game #bitterpotionnfics

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m4ndysk4nkovich · 3 months

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i keep seeing “me and my husband” by mitski in gallavich playlists and like… no. WRONG. INCORRECT. *loud incorrect buzzer*

are ian and mickey husbands?? YES. are they happy? YES. and that is precisely why they are not “me and my husband”.

“me and my husband” is so grossly misinterpreted and it kills me… it is not about a healthy relationship; the song isn’t about a stable happy marriage like…

you know who fits “me and my husband”? lip and mandy.

the song is about a houswife who is dependent on her spouse- who places her worth on her husband. it’s about unhealthy attachment, being so attached and dependent that you really aren’t your own person without your spouse, and not in a good way. not like you fit together like puzzle pieces, like you are really not a person without them.

season 3 mandy IS that song. people joke about how mandy’s like a housewife, and like, yeah she kinda is. being without lip, or even the thought of being without him, destroys her. and it ends up literally destroying karen because of what it drove (no pun intended) mandy to do. “and i am the idiot with a painted face, in the corner, taking up space” is such a mandy line, especially when lip screams at her to go home to her own fucking house. she thrives when lip loves her, but when he doesn’t, she goes crazy. she craves it- she’s addicted to it because she’s never been loved and the only way she knows how to get love is through her sexuality, so she will literally do anything in her power to get him to love her even if it means ruining herself.

anyways, ian and mickey may be attached, but they aren’t attached like that. they have been unhealthy and toxic, but not like that. ian and mickey are much more like “i’m your man” by mitski.

#i say ‘like’ too much #should i make a post about ian and mickey with im your man?? maybe #pls stop letting my meta flop tumblr i beg of you #shameless #shameless meta #ian gallagher #mickey milkovich #mandy milkovich #lip gallagher #gallavich #lip x mandy #mitski #me and my husband

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sunny-fox · 9 months

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I've been wanting to write this for a while now -

God! Reader who stims + Headcanons

Idea by: @karmawonders (please check out their blog too!!)

Fandom: Genshin Impact

Reader's pronouns: -

Notes: implied neurodivergent reader & characters, self-indulgent, includes personal headcanons

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Candace sat on your bed, legs dangling over the edge. She had turned to her left to face you - you lay on your side, huddled underneath your blanket and cuddling a pillow. The two of you chatted idly, till you blinked sleepily and yawned, rubbing at your eye.

"Are you going to sleep now, Your Grace?" Candace asked softly.

You nodded, grabbing your blanket and pulling it up to your nose. You breathed in deeply, rubbing the fabric between your fingers as you did so.

You noticed Candace looking at you curiously. "Don't mind me...I'm just stimming," you mumbled, rubbing the blanket against your nose.

The look on Candace's face turned into one of realisation. She nodded in response and ran her fingers through your hair gently. "Sweet dreams, Your Grace," she whispered.

You hummed quietly and continued to breathe in the scent of your blanket.

Candace left your room after giving you one last pat on the head.

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You were walking in the streets of Fontaine, with Navia keeping you company. Glancing at the various shops and wares available, you hummed any song that you could think of every time your eyes settled on something new that reminded you of them.

A few minutes later, you looked to your side and saw Navia staring at you with a soft gaze and a smile (she probably had been doing so for at least ten minutes). You froze momentarily, and your humming halted as well.

"Is everything alright, Your Grace?" Navia asked.

"Everything's okay, but why were you staring at me?" You asked. "If it's because of my humming, then... I'm sorry. I'll stop."

"That's because I love to hear you hum!" Navia replied. "It's okay, you can continue humming. It's not annoying at all. It's really nice."

You grinned at Navia gratefully before continuing to hum. You noticed that Navia bobbed her head occasionally or matched the clicks of her boots as she walked according to your hums.

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You were hanging out with Heizou for today, and the both of you decided to have lunch at Uyuu Restaurant.

While he was waiting for the food to be served, Heizou heard some soft clicks. He looked at you and saw you resting your hands against the edge of the table. You were picking at your fingernails and the skin of your fingers.

"Your Grace." Heizou's voice caught your attention. You looked up and saw him staring into your eyes. "Please stop doing that."

"Oh - I'm sorry!" You quickly put your hands on your knees, gripping them so that you wouldn't pick at your fingers. "Those clicks sound annoying; I know. I'm really sorry."

"No, that's not the problem," Heizou said, leaning forward slightly. "The problem is, it's bad for you. I understand that you're just stimming, but that's an unhealthy stim." He stood from his original seat and moved around the table to sit next to you, reaching out with one hand, palm facing upward. "May I please have a look at your hand?"

Reluctantly, you placed your hand in his, showing him your uneven nails. Heizou sighed and rubbed his thumb against them.

"There's nothing wrong with stimming, Your Grace, but please don't hurt yourself while you stim," he said. "Here, you can play with this." He undid the black pom-pom attached to his clothing and pressed it onto your palm.

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Headcanons:

Kaeya whistles to stim. Please teach him all of the songs you know; in return, he'll teach you all of the Teyvat songs he knows. He wants to whistle along with your songs while you hum.

Klee has a comfort blanket that she cuddles to sleep every night. She's so happy to know that you have the same way of stimming as her! She's heard a lot of adults saying things like "kids should outgrow their habit of having comfort blankets when they grow up", so please assure her that it's not true.

Shenhe rubs her sleeves when she's stressed or nervous. You'll see her doing so when she's in a crowd, or before she wants to talk to you. Just like Klee, she needs assurance that stimming isn't bad, as some people still give her weird looks when she does so.

Beidou whistles to stim as well. Unlike Kaeya, she doesn't whistle when you hum. She likes to imitate the calls of all kinds of birds. Sometimes a bird or two will swoop down from the air to land on her shoulder or hand after hearing her whistles.

Yuegui is Yaoyao's stim toy. She always holds it in her arms so that she can give it a squeeze now and then, or breathe in the smell of osmanthus flowers on it. Yuegui makes her feel safe - it was originally made by Cloud Retainer to protect her, after all.

Sara likes to run her fingers through her feathers. She just materialises her wings and brushes them with her hand, albeit only when there's very few people around. When she's in public, she chews on the inside of her mouth.

Kirara waves her tails back and forth. Some people tell her to stop because they keep seeing something (her tails) swishing in their peripheral vision when she stims - they say that it's annoying. Please tell them off, pat Kirara on the head and tell her that it's okay to stim.

Collei fiddles with the tassels of her shawl while patrolling or learning new words. When she's at home, where she doesn't have to be cautious all the time, Cuilen-Anbar is her comfort "blanket". (Inspired by that one cutscene where Collei cuddles Cuilen-Anbar while sleeping)

Wanderer may not admit it, but he stims too! He used to fiddle with his vision only when he's 100% sure there's no one around. Similar to Sara, his stimming behaviour was very subtle in public - he rubbed his fingers against his sleeves whenever he crossed his arms over his chest. He's actually quite relieved when you tell him that stimming in front of others is totally fine.

Lynette stims by playing with her ponytail. She does it every time before a performance. Sometimes she twists her ponytail, sometimes she runs her fingers through it, sometimes she curls a strand of it around her finger. Occasionally, Lyney has to help her undo the knots in her hair 5 minutes before he has to go on stage.

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I love my stim toys hehe

It's okay for anyone to stim as long as you don't hurt anyone, including yourself!

#genshin cult au #genshin x reader #candace x reader #navia x reader #heizou x reader #sagau #self aware genshin

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