#why am i thinking so erotically about her she's my baby
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Lady Crowley, inspired by Aphrodite of Knidos.
She might as well have been the one who posed for Praxiteles.
#good omens#good omens fanwork#good omens fanart#good omens fandom#crowley#good omens crowley#fem!crowley#lady crowley#my art#my artwork#my drawing#traditional art#traditional drawing#hand drawing#sketchbook#my fanart#line art#lineart#i have never tried drawing anything remotely similar to a naked body before#well... she's not fully naked (originally she was supposed to show her breasts) but oh well just a quick drawing#i thought making the tattoo on the sternum would be the hottest thing ever#ha imagine if half the aphrodite and venus statues were crowley and she also posed for the first nude female sculpture#i found the reference on pinterest (as always) and had to do it#i doubt i'll color it or shade it this was me sticking out my neck enough already#that's what you get for letting a classical student watch go#lady crowley darling you are everything#why am i thinking so erotically about her she's my baby#aphrodite#liking good omens means putting the two clowns in random historical situation#i don't know if i'm satisfied with it but i'm glad i tried
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It's The year of The Rabbit and a certain Snow Angel decided to be a Snow Bunny much to Jaune's surprise (Art by LainArt)
Jaune is checking the calendar in his room.
Jaune: It seems that this Chinese year will be the year of the dragon. I should prepare something to celebrate.
*BAM!* The door to his room burst open.
Jaune: What the?!
Weiss: Don't even think about starting to plan that.
Jaune: Weiss?! *Blushing* What are you wearing?!
Weiss: My bunny costume of course.
Jaune: Why are you wearing that?
Weiss: Because it's still the year of the rabbit, duh.
Jaune: I mean, why are you wearing it now?
Weiss: I wanted to wear it sooner but when I ordered it the shipping was delayed and then it didn't came in my size, I had to adjust it, and here I am. Do you like it?
She says while posing adorably in front of him.
Jaune: *Quietly* You look so good~
Weiss: What did you say?
Jaune: I-I said, your costume looks good.
Weiss: *Smiling* Thank you~ I really like this, buy my only problem I have with this costume is the back.
Jaune: Like the zipper?
Weiss: No, my butt. Look.
Weiss turns around showing her big ass to Jaune. She puts her hands on each cheek and stretches them a little.
Weiss: It's very tight down here.
Jaune: (MY OUM!!) I-I see...
Weiss: And I also feel like it makes my ass look bigger, don't you think?
Jaune: I-I mean *Ahem* I mean, respectfully, it looks (So fucking delicious!~💕) good.
Weiss: Are you sure? Just look closer
Weiss says as she walks backwards towards Jaune. Her ass bouncing with every step she takes.
Jaune: I-I'm fine from here, t-there's no need to do that. (My God! If she gets closer, I may…)
Weiss: At least feel it…
She says while she bumps her ass against his pelvis.
Jaune: 😳❗️
Weiss: Doesn't it feel a little... tight?~💕
She says it as she rubbed Jaune's bulge with her ass.
Jaune: W-Weiss, what are you doing?
Weiss: I don't know. What does it look like I'm doing?~💕
Jaune: I-If you do this I would get the wrong idea. (Is this really happening?!)
Weiss: Maybe I want you to think like that~💕
Jaune: Weiss, you....
Weiss: I need you to take care of this Bunny,...
She takes his hands, puts them on her belly and slides them up until they stop on her modest chest.
Weiss: ..Daddy~💕
Jaune:...
Moments later
*PLAT!PLAT!PLAT!PLAT!PLAT!PLAT!PLAT!PLAT!*
Weiss: 💕OH DADDY, I'M CUMMING!!!!💕
Jaune has Weiss on all fours, pulling her hair while fucking her hard and eager. With each thrust Weiss's soft ass bounces erotically. It's a tremendous force that she clings to the bed sheets to keep herself in place.
Jaune: You're going to be a good little bunny and get pregnant for me, right?
*Smack!*
Weiss: Mmm!~💕 Yes Daddy!💕 I want your babies!💕
Jaune: Good girl~ Now... Fuck~... get ready. I'm about to cum.
*Smack!*
Weiss: Ah!~💕 Yes!!💕 Cum!💕 Cum inside me!!💕 Fill me up!!!💕
Jaune: Oh Fuck!
Jaune pushes Weiss's head to the ground, as he throws all his weight into her. Thrusting his cock deep inside her.
Weiss: Aah! Yes!~💕Yes!~💕Yes!~💕Yes!~💕
Jaune: Shit! I'm about to... Oh fuck... Oh Fuck! OH FUUUCK!!!
Weiss begins to feel how Jaune fills her completely. It's so hot and stimulating, that she melts in pleasure. Making her cum once again.
Weiss: AAHhh!!~ Thank you, Daddy~💕
#jaune arc#rwby jaune arc#rwby jaune#jaune#rwby weiss#weiss schnee#rwby weiss schnee#weiss#white knight#rwby white knight#rwby#the year of the rabbit#rwby jaune x weiss#jaune x weiss#rwby jaune arc x weiss#jaune arc x weiss schnee
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Hiii!!
May I request top Jennie using dub reader as her little fuck toy, or something like that
Like with Jennie being a top I mean degrading the reader and riding the readers face
Thank you bby 🫶🏻
I am sorry for answering these just now after months... I'll do my best to write the requests I had before the hiatus thing. That being said... I hope you like this one. 💖💖💖 (ps: i'm getting back to writing just now so this isn't my best work of all times lol)
cw: humiliation, face slapping, face sitting, fingering, gagging, age gap, power imbalance, face fucking, not proof read, etc.
You were finally at the place you were supposed to be.
Alright, okay, it was an internship but it was an internship at the design department of Chanel. That basically meant you could only climb further to the top, and nothing and no one could stand in your way.
It was your third week and everything was going smoothly... sort of.
Your phone buzzed in your pocket and you quickly answered.
"Hello, is this the Chanel intern speaking?" You heard your best friend's voice and smiled.
"Yes it is" You sounded way too cocky but that was the fun of it. "Is this the new Versace intern speaking?" You asked and Ning exploded in a mix of screams and laughter.
"hell yes it is!" You guys briefly spoke about a few matters until she finally popped the question you were waiting. "So... did you meet my sister there?"
"I already know your sister from your house" You rolled your eyes.
"yes but here you only met Jennie" She said. "In there she is Ms. Kim, CEO and head of the department. Believe me, I know the difference."
"I know, I know..." You took a sip of your coffee in your desk on the lobby of Jennie's office. "Of course we met, I am basically her assistant" You sounded defeated.
"Why the sad voice? Is she giving you a hard time?" Ning sounded concerned and you pouted a bit.
"I think she is trying to state that it's not because me and you are friends that she is going to treat me any different..." You were interrupted by the sound of her private elevator. "Gotta go!" You immediately hang up, getting up to wait for her by the door.
As soon as it opened you felt your heart drop. Jennie was everything you aimed to be, had everything you wanted to have. Of course she didn't spare you a glance and of course that made her feel even more alluring to you.
"Good morning, Ms Kim" You bowed and she handed you her bag and coat, going straight to her office and shutting the door off. You took a deep breath, the perfume on her coat being the most inebriating thing you've ever felt in your life. Of course you knew it was not just her perfume, but her natural scent as well.
🌸🌸🌸.
The afternoon went smoothly, you two went to one meeting and that was it. Jennie let you go alone to your place of work to finish a few documents for her as she went to check a few things.
You got back and went straight to work, knowing very well she hated when you delayed anything she asked you to do. She commanded everything with an iron fist.
As you worked you could see the expensive coat hanging from the corner of your eye. It was so beautiful and smooth and... it smelled like her. It was as if you were in a daydream, you could feel yourself walking but with no real thought in mind, reaching it but not really minding that you were still inside the building and that she was there too.
You stopped in front of the huge mirror in front of her office, she loved looking at herself and you knew exactly why. She was perfect. You wanted to be like her.
You tried the black fur coat over your tight outfit, a baby pink mini skirt and matching blazer over a white button up.
You stared at yourself in the mirror, engulfed in her perfume, her scent, imagining how it would feel being her for a whole day, feeling the coat as if you were feeling your own skin in an almost erotic motion, up and down; But it wasn't your own self you were lingering to touch. You wanted to feel her, touch her.
"Having fun?" Her voice felt like a bucket of cold water, not only alerting you to what you just did but scaring the hell out of you.
"Ms Kim, I-" You stuttered and she raised her perfect hand in a 'Stop talking" kind of motion. You swallowed your words, along with the tears threatening to escape your eyes.
She felt even more overpowering standing there with her eyes on you, her perfect posture and incredibly expensive suit did nothing to help your heart lower the crazy beating.
"Who gave you permission for that?" She said, slowly walking towards you, her gaze heavy on your already shaky body.
"I am sorry i just- I thought..." You tripped over your words as her eyes roamed over your figure. She scoffed.
"You thought?" She arched one perfect eyebrow. "I really didn't knew you were capable of such thing" Her voice was venomous and you lowered your gaze, pouting.
"I am sorry" You finally managed to say, starting to take off the coat.
"Keep it on" You stopped and she continued, grabbing your face between her fingers, her nails sinking in a bit. "I think we should play a little game" Her body was so close to yours your knees were almost giving up on holding your weight as her breath fanned over your lips. "You give me something good and I don't kick you out for touching what's mine" She scanned your beautiful face: red cheeks, furrowed eyebrows, closed eyes to avoid her cat like ones.
A single tear escaped your eyes as she rolled hers in annoyance.
"What should I give you, ma'am?" You asked but she shook her head, turning your face towards the mirror and you whimpered. She smiled, nearing her lips to your ear.
"What could a little dumb intern possibly give me that I don't already have?" She whispered and you felt goosebumps, watching your reflection on the mirror. You were pretty sure that was a wet dream of yours.
"Please..." Your hand held her wrist and she made you look into her eyes again. They were like a fire, slowly burning yours. "I will give you anything you want but please don't fire me" You gulped, feeling yourself getting wet. What she wanted crossed your mind and you really prayed you were correct.
"Anything?" She playfully said and you took her by surprise when your knees touched the floor, both hands on your thighs, lowering your eyes to her expensive shoes.
Of course the dom inside her saw the erotic side of kneeling when you did it, she just didn't think you'd be bold enough to do what you did next.
You reached for the button of her trousers and she followed your movements with her eyes, not moving to see until where you'd go. Your trembling hands unzipped them, and you pulled them down to her ankles, a drenched mess as you saw her lacy underwear visibly shining with wetness seeping trough.
You whimpered when she held your chin up, staring at your pleading demeanor with a smile forming on her lips.
"I could report you for sexual harassment right now" She said and you panicked a bit.
"Please don't..." Your eyes were full of tears now. She smiled even wider, her thumb caressing your lower lip.
Oh Jennie Kim... not just her eyes were a cat's, her actions were much like a feline's as well, playing with her prey before actually devouring it. Enjoying the despair on your face as she pushed the digit between your lips and you promptly sucked on it, rolling your tongue over it and closing your eyes.
She kicked her trousers off her ankles, taking you off of that trance when she pulled you by the hair so you would open your eyes.
"Tongue out" She commanded and you did what she said, whimpering and bawling your fists. "Unbutton your blouse" Your trembling hands did as she told and her eyes darkened by seeing your boobs and tummy. She spat on your tongue without warning, watching her saliva and yours trickle down to your boobs and chin. "Fuck"
Without saying any more words she pulled her panties to the side and mounted your face, lowering her pulsing cunt to your lips, feeling the vibrations of your moans against her core.
She tasted like heaven, her thick wetness made you roll your eyes as she held your head with both hands to grind better on your gorgeous face.
"I knew you had to be good for something" She growled, speeding up the pace so her clit could get stimulated faster as your nose bumped it.
The pleasure she felt was not only on the fact that you were so willing to give her good head, no; it was in the way you so willingly submitted to her. That was a dream of hers since the first time you entered her parent's house with her sister: short little skirt and a gullible expression, ready to be thrown around like a little doll.
But Jennie was a patient woman and of course she picked on your personality traits to realize you enjoyed being degraded , ignored and of course, coerced by the right person. That's why she put on some effort to have you under her eyes at all times, under her command.
You thought she was your obsession but little did you know she was the one obsessing over you.
"That's right, keep going" She said, rolling her hips against your lips. She saw in first hand how your pupils grew wider, your hands tempted to hold her by the ass so you could savor her better.
Suddenly she forcefully pulled you away by the hair, your hooded eyes and glistening face made her pride grow inside of her. You whined trying to get your face back where it belong.
"Please, more..." You were shaking, drooling like a mad animal.
You felt a sharp sting on your cheek and that made you clench, specially when Jennie kneeled in front of you to lick your cheek up and down until she stopped on your neck.
"Dumb little thing" She said, harshly sucking on your skin. "Do you want me back in your mouth, pup?" She said and you mewled, nodding. Another slap. "Use your words, slut" She held your hair by the nape so you'd look into her eyes.
"Yes ma'am, please let me lick you please please" You cried out, desperate to make her feel good. She smiled, pushing you to lay down as she pushed open your legs, a satisfied grin on her perfect lips.
"Oh, I knew you'd enjoy eating me out but you are soaked" she admired the wet patch on your panties, promptly pulling them from you. "Open your mouth" She commanded and you did as she told, feeling the fabric being pushed past your lips deep down almost in your throat. You gagged, gasping for air and she stopped. "Keep it there and don't you dare touch my hair" her voice was dangerous and you almost glued your hands to your sides.
She spread your pussy lips, admiring your hole and pretty pussy, spitting on it before giving it a tempting lick to taste you. Jennie nearly growled, latching her lips to your clit and your scream was muffled by the fabric in your mouth. You saw not only stars when she licked your slit next, humming upon feeling your taste.
Her nails dug in your thighs and you hissed, trembling a lot and making her smile against your wet pussy; Her tongue kept circling your clit and with not much effort she plucked two of her digits inside you to harshly thrust them up, quickly finding your gspot and rubbing it.
"I wanna hear you now" She got up to your face, puling the panties from your mouth and you gave her a relieved moan, your eyes full of tears as you felt her relentless pounding, knuckles deep inside you. "Such a good little slut" She said, finally kissing your lips.
Her lips felt delicious and you clenched when you managed to feel your taste on them, creaming on her fingers, rolling your eyes when her tongue didn't stop the assault on yours. She gave your tongue a harsh suck and you almost cried, hugging her against you, trying your best to feel her. You needed that woman; everything, anything.
You could feel your heartbeat in your ears; she ws your best friend's big sister, the unapproachable Jennie Kim.
Oh you were fucked. So fucked.
Without stopping her fingers she got up enough to fully sit on your face in a 69 position and you could finally feel that heavenly taste again, moaning against her core and hooking your arms on her thighs to hold her down. Who cares if it was suffocating? You got the chance to make the Jennie Kim feel good, it was worth dying for it.
"god" You felt her mutter against your clit, humping your face full force, you could see her hole clenching and unclenching the more she moaned against you. "I'm gonna paint your pretty face with my cum" She said through gritted teeth and without much warning you came, melting under her, shaking like a leaf in the wind, going limp as she kept the relentless pace of staining your whole face with her juices while she came as well, that creamy liquid delicious against your lips and face.
You just laid there, taking whatever she wanted you to take as she kept humping, trembling on top of you, her breath heavy as she tried to recompose herself.
Without warning (again because of course she didn't need to tell you shit) she got up, dressing herself as you tried to do the same but you only managed to sit on your ankles, knees on the floor again. She collected your juices from her chin on her fingers, stretching her hand out to you and your foggy brain thought she was helping you get up.
"Don't be dumb" She said, rolling her eyes. "Clean my fingers, pup" You pouted, obeying. Your tongues swirled against her fingers as the two of you made eye contact, her dilated pupils following every move you made. "Enough" She said and you got back to positioning yourself on your knees, lowered head. "For a dumb little intern you are quite a fast learner" she held you by the chin. "I wonder who else you kneeled to" She said, annoyed by that thought.
Jennie let your face go, bending to get your panties from the floor.
"Keep the coat" Her eyes sparkled. "I'll keep these" She put it in her pocket as prize, taking a black card from it. "You are mine now" She handed you the card. "Buy more lingeries and nice outfits for you" Jennie said leaving to get in her office. "I still want a lot of things from you, pup" She said, closing her door and leaving you dumbfounded on the floor.
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“Care to Remake One of Those Scenes?”
"Care to Remake One of Those Scenes"
Pt. 1??????????? (Let me know down below.)
Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!reader.
Word count: About 2,400 words
Warnings: 18+, Older Henderson Sibling, talks about Erotic writing, mentions of porn, implied sexual relations, and a little choking, talks about worried of mental health. I think that is it, but please let me know in the comments if I missed anything.
Summary: Older Henderson Sibling had been avoiding Eddie and the rest of their friends since finding a new Erotic book which has taken up all of her free time. Best friend Eddie confronts her, and see’s how dirty his best friend really is when he reads a page from her book. NOT REALLY ANY SMUT, But pretty fluffy.
Author’s note: Hello everyone I AM BACK! I mean I am still depressed as fuck, which is why I stopped writing in the first place, plus I just had a lot go on in the last couple of months. But I think I’m ready to get back to writing. ANYWAY, moving on, I really wanted to write smut into this but I just couldn’t get myself to because I wanted to get it posted since coming up with the idea yesterday. I really hope you enjoy but please don’t come for me since I know I keep changing between different tenses, I’m just too depressed and lazy to care to go back to change it.
But I may, and I mean may make a part 2 if it gets requested enough. But enjoy my babies, and hope you are all doing well!
Writing Masterlist
Eddie and Dustin strolled into the Henderson home after a successful campaign looking for the eldest Henderson sibling, you had been actively avoiding everyone the since Monday. Worried, they wondered why you said you were going to be unable to pick the younger sibling up after hellfire was over tonight, it wasn't like you to not show up. Little did they know it wasn't anything as serious as Eddie thought it was, you were just caught up in a daydream of what you wished your life was.
"(Y/N)?" Eddie called out as he shut the front door behind him, causing a loud bang to echo throughout the living room. Dustin winced as he finger flied straight to his ear to protect his hearing. After having his eardrums basically blew out on the ride here, his ears were sore.
"She's probably in her room, her car is outside." He motions to the hall, setting his bag down as he walked to the kitchen to find something to consume after a long day. He knew you were probably okay, and would come forward eventually if there was anything serious going on. Yeah it was a little weird to him that you would not show up to a place Eddie was going to be to, but he knew it wasn't anything serious.
Hell he's hoping soon you two would realize you were into each other.
Eddie nodded at the younger kid before making his way to your bedroom, wanting to check on his bestfriend. He knows you get like this sometimes but can't help but worry each time scared one time there will actually be something keeping you from him.
You hadn't heard them come in, you were laying comfortably on your bed with a book sprawled out in front of you, and headphones blasting music from your Walkman. The smile on your face was wide as you read one of the best books of your life, legs kicking happily behind you while you chewed on your thumbnail in anticipation on what was going to come next.
Eddie knocked on your door, waiting for an answer or to see the door open. A few moments passed without any acknowledgment, so he pressed his head against the door, hearing the low sound of music playing. Standing there for a few more moments he decided to open the door, praying he wouldn't be intruding in a private moment. Once someone hits middle school, you never know what you're going to get when you enter someone's room unannounced.
Leaning slightly into the room, he spotted you on the bed. You were smiling to yourself as you read your book. He smiled at the sight of you, happy to see you at least looked like you were doing fine. But the smile soon turned to a slight frown as he wondered what was so special about the book that it made you fall away from reality the past couple days. He felt like he's barely talked to you. Every time he's seen you, your head has been buried in that novel.
He was done living second place to a book, he missed his best friend and he wanted to spend some time with you, he wasn't going to let the book take away your usual Friday night movie nights. He survived not seeing you much this week, but he wasn't about to sacrifice a weekend. Sneaking into the room, he quietly shuts the door behind him, trying to not make a noise as he creeps behind you.
Your mind was still intwined with your book, still not noticing his presence yet. Your smile was widening more as Christian and Alice sneaked away into the closet of their workplace, unable to keep their hands off each other. Your face reddened as your eyes skimmed over the dirty scene wishing ever so much Eddie was Christian and you were Alice, sneaking into the janitors room between classes. You too understood how hard it was to keep your hands to yourself when Eddie would wear a certain pair of jeans.
You had thought about doing more than friendly things with Eddie so much that your favorite troupe had became friends to lovers, waiting for the day that maybe someday it would happen to you. Almost all the stories you've consumed other than for class lately had been centered around the troupe to help you manage with not being able to confess your feelings to Eddie.
You didn't have time to comprehend as Eddie snatched the book from behind you, making you jump at the sudden action of the stack of paper being ripped from your hands. Realizing what happen, you yank off your Walkman, turning to him as he held your dirty little secret in his hands, slight smirk on his face as he waves it slightly.
Your eyes widened as he went to open it.
"Wait! Eddie please give it back! Please, I don't want you to lose my spot." You reached for it as the metalhead took a step back, waving his finger at you as he tsks, the noise echoing through your brain as your mind races at what he would think if he knew what he was holding in his hands.
"Not till I know what's so great about this thing, and why it's keeping my best friend from me. You had me worried all week." Eddie speaks, scanning the cover for any indication on what it's about, which you thanked a god you didn't even believe in, that the cover looked like a normal book cover.
Your eyes met his as you physically pleaded.
"I'm sorry that I had you worried, but it's nothing special, I promise you. It wouldn't be of interest to you, it doesn't have anything mythical or magical. Can I please have it back?" You asked again, a little more eagerly.
Eddie shook his head no, holding the book in his hand as he took a seat in the desk chair next to your bed. His fingers held the page you were on last as he got comfortable in the wooden chair. He took another look at the book before looking back at your tense body, sensing you were hiding something.
"Come on (Y/N), it has to be somewhat interesting. You're acting like me when I checked out Lord of the Rings. " He argued, making you sigh as you realized there was no way of getting out of this unless you somehow manage to get the book out his ring-covered hands.
You sat up a little taller in hopes of seeming more convincing, as you pointed back to the book.
"It's just some girly book Eddie, romance. All that gooey gross romantic shit." You shrug, which wasn't a complete lie. It was friends to lovers, just he didn't need to know about the erotic portion of it.
Eddie's eyes met yours after you glanced down at the book before bringing your line of sight back to his. He didn't believe you, he knew you were holding something back in order to save yourself. He didn't want you to think you had to hide yourself from him, hell if anyone knows what it's like to be into weird things, it's him.
"What's so great about this romance that you couldn't even pick Dustin up from Hellfire tonight?" He asks, leaning forward as he holds the book out in front of him, the book ever so slightly dangling between his fingers as he teased you.
"Maybe I was too caught up in it because of my lack of one." You shrugged, which is partially true. It's hard to just be friends with Eddie when you want to be more, you needed an outlet.
Eddie watched your body language as he continued motioning the book in front of you like you were an animal he was trying to catch.
"Mmmh, and even though the book is nothing special you want to spend all your time reading it?" He asked as your eyes focused on his hands.
"Yes. Now since I've answered your questions, can I please have it back?" You begged, well basically yelled as you stood up, flinging yourself at your book, hoping to get it out of his grasp. You just knew Eddie would never let this go if he found out the kind of things you liked to enjoy in your free time.
Eddie was too fast for you though, he knew you too well and could already see it from your body language that you were going to try coming for the book. He had stood up and turned around before you even reached him, chuckling slightly as he shook his head.
Tsking you again, he opened the book.
"You bad girl, trying to steal it back- You can't have the book till I read the last page you were on. Then, and I mean then maybe I'll decide if this book is good enough to have put our friendship on hold." He laughed as he glanced down at the long paragraphs in front of him.
Your voice felt needy as you pleaded for him not to.
"No Eddie, please don't. I'm begging you." Eddie turned towards you, ready to read what was consuming your free time.
"Come on (Y/N) it's just a book, it can't be that bad." He reassured, eyes darting across the first line as your brought your hands to your hair. Knowing there was no way to get out of this.
Eddie's eyes widen as he read the page, cheeks reddening as much as yours. Not even halfway done with the page he decides he has to say something.
"You're not only a bad girl, you're also a dirty one!" He grinned, he hadn't realized his best friend would read something so filthy. He knew you weren't innocent but god were you more dirty than he knew.
His comment makes you groan out in embarrassment as you sat on your bed while he continues.
"You're not reading a book (Y/N), you're reading porn." He laughed lightly, eyes darkening as he finished the page.
"You literally have dirty magazines in your room." You argued, feeling your body burn as he closed the book to focus on you.
"But that's different, my porn has pictures. Plus I use them for personal pleasure, and I don't read them in public around my friends." He taunts, as his eyebrow raised, "Do you use this for personal pleasure?" He questions, making you turn more red at the conversation at hand.
Why couldn't I had just picked Dustin up, you cursed yourself as you turned back towards him.
"No." You answered, shrugging slightly as he looked at you with a 'really' expression, not believing your words one bit. He knew for a fact you got off, hell just last week you and Robin went to the 'toy store.'
Sighing, you speak because you were already caught. Plus it wasn't like he didn't know about your sex life, or lack there of this year.
"Okay, not like while reading but sometimes after, when I'm laying in bed at night." You tell him, your cheeks blushing as he smiles more.
"How often do you read this kind of stuff?" Eddie asks, taking a seat next to you, deciding it was finally time to hand you back your so called book, which he would claim was porn with words.
"More often than I want to admit," You laughed, looking down worn out pages.
"God you're as big of a perv as me," He grinned, leaning back onto the bed with his hands behind his head. Catching your eyes as they twinkled down at him.
"I still think you're a bigger one," You joked, setting your book and Walkman down on the dresser before leaning back next to him.
"Hey, at least I'm open about my pervyness." He states, lightly tapping your elbow with his.
"Well I'm sorry that I don't want to shout to the world I like to read erotica." You giggled as you turned to look at him, the rocker licking his lips as his mind races.
"What do you think about as you read it?"
"What do you mean?" You questioned, feeling your face redden.
"What goes through your head, as you read about Christian and Alice?" He challenged, voice sounding thick. Your eyes flicked across his face as butterflies erupted in your stomach.
"I liked to picture myself as Alice, sometimes." You tell him, as he leaned onto his side taking in your words.
"And who do you see as Christian?" He hums, free hand moving to push your hair behind your ear before resting on the side of your neck.
"Does it really matter?" You breathe out slowly when you realized how close you and Eddie had actually become on the bed.
"Very." He whispers, hand still lingering on your neck.
You gulp taking a deep breathe, nervous at the sight in front of you, wondering if you were imagining it.
"Come on sweetheart, who do you think about?" He asks again, eyes darting between your lips and eyes.
"I-i don't want to say." You stutter, breathing getting heavier as the tension thickens. He chuckles to himself lightly at the sight of you underneath him, basically already falling apart. Your chest moved up and down slowly as he eyed the necklace sitting on your neck, twiring it between his fingers, making you take a deep inhale at the light touch.
He rolls over leaning more above you, your face just inches from his as he mumbles down at your lips, before bringing his eyes back to yours.
"What would Alice do in one of those scenes of your book baby? I bet she would tell Christian when he asked, wouldn't she?" He hums down at you, looking at you in a way he had never done before.
"You, I think about you." You breathe out, letting out a breathe you didn't even realize you were holding.
A smirk comes across Eddie's face as your necklace tightens around your neck while he brings his face closer to yours, his strong hands holding it tightly.
"Care to remake one of the scenes?" He whispers against your lips, barely brushing against them.
A sigh slips your lips against his.
"Please." You beg, your soft hands moving up to his hair as his lips crash against yours.
You knew just by how he was holding you, this wasn't going to be the last time you begged him tonight just like it wasn't the first.
#eddie munson#eddie stranger things#eddie munson fluff#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson smut#eddie munson angst#eddie munson x plus size reader#eddie munson x you#stranger things#stranger things spoliers#stranger things season 4#joseph quinn#joseph quinn imagine#joseph quinn x reader#joseph quinn x you#eddie munson imagine
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Shameless | Prologue
Genre: Thriller/Horror/Romance/Smut
Warnings: Explicit language/mention of domestic violence/mention of violence/alcohol abuse/mention of death/stalker/mentions of blood/drug abuse/smut scenes/dark mature themes/triggering scenes/traumatic experiences
Word count: 688
I stopped by the mailbox hoping for some good news today, "Adonis, halt." I told the Golden Retriever, I pulled out the mail; there were letters addressed to Sarah and Sophie. Only one was addressed to me; I locked the mailbox before walking up the steps.
Walking up the porch stairs, Adonis barked. "Hey, you, done with your morning jog?" Sarah asked with a faint smile. I hand her the mail, "How's Sophie?" I asked. Sarah sighs as she gets up, and follows Adonis inside the house. I bit my bottom lip and followed behind, "I worked all day for this shit!?" Axel slammed Sophie's bedroom door and came rushing down the stairs. "Hello to you as well..." I muttered as Axel slammed the front door on his way out.
Sarah and I exchanged looks before running upstairs and to Sophie's room, "Soph, you okay!?" Sarah called out, knocking on the door. Sarah pulls out the spare key; we step inside. Sophie was puking her guts out in the bathroom; Sarah rushed in to help her. I leaned against the door frame, "What happened?" I asked. Sophie sobs, "Axel found out about me being an erotic performer,". I pinched the bridge of my nose in annoyance, "You didn't tell him?! Sophie, why didn't you tell Axel?" I asked.
Sophie pukes even more; Sarah sends me a soft glare. "Sophie, how did Axel find out?" Sarah asked, "I...Jungkook told him about it; he found the website." Sophie cries and looks at me. "Your stupid boyfriend told him before I could." She sobs. I exhaled sharply and walked out of her bedroom; I stormed into my bedroom and grabbed my phone.
Jungkook didn't answer his phone until the fourth ring, "Hey babe, I'm sorry for getting to your call late," He said. I rolled my eyes, "Oh, cut the crap Jungkook, you told Axel about Sophie's job?! Are you fucking kidding me?! You had no right to meddle in," I said, letting him know that I was very pissed off and irritated. I could hear whispers on his end; I pressed my tongue inside my cheek. Oh, he's fucking dead meat, "Baby, you know that Axel is a very good friend of mine, and he was worried that Sophie was cheating on him. So I did what any friend would do, you know." Jungkook said, letting out a shaky breath. No doubt he's out fucking someone. "Oh shut the fuck up, Jungkook, don't ever meddle in a relationship that isn't yours," I said, hanging up.
I sighed in frustration; Adonis ran into my bedroom and nudged my leg. "Yes, I know...I know." I whispered, patting his head as I sat down on my bed. I took a deep breath and looked at Adonis, "Okay, I'm calm now...what am I going to do about Jungkook? Should I break up with him? I mean, I just discovered he's been cheating on me with Charlotte," I said. Adonis barked and placed his paw on my lap. "What would you know, Adonis? You're a pup. A baby who lives without a care in the world." I whispered and ruffled his soft golden hair.
"Hey, you okay?" Sarah asked; I smiled and nodded. "Yeah, just thinking...I'm thinking of breaking things off with Jungkook." I said, getting up from the bed. Sarah looked perplexed, "You're really gonna do it?" She asked. I smiled and nodded, "Yeah, besides, why would I give him another opportunity to cheat on me." I said. Sarah nods, "True, so have you heard any news from the internship?" She asked. I gasped and looked for the beige envelope; it was sitting on the desk. I opened the letter and began to read it carefully, "At least I got good news today," I said with a grin. "Did you get it?!" Sarah asked with a smile, I nodded, and we both squealed. "HWANG Enterprises, wow, Y/N this is great news," Sarah said.
I sighed in relief, "It is; I can't believe it." I whispered as I looked at the letter. This is the new start I was looking for.
#straykids#straykidsimagines#wattpad#stray kids imagines#stray kids smut#stray kids#hyunjin smut#hyunjin imagines#hwang hyunjin#skz hyunjin smut#skz hyunjin#hwang hyunjin smut#stray kids hyunjin#straykids hyunjin#hyunjin#straykidshyunjin#stray kids hwang hyunjin icons
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I Must Know About the There is No Bankai in Football one :eyes:
So, There is No Bankai in Football is, in part about Rukia wanting to do something nice and romantic for Renji but she doesn't know what. In the original concept, she spent a bunch of time going around and asking people for advice, including, for some reason, Ikkaku.
🤜 💥 🤛
“--I feel like you really misrepresented yourself, here, Kuchiki!”
“We’re fighting, aren’t we?!” Rukia shouting, smashing her fist into one of Madarame’s kidneys.
Ikkaku cursed colorfully. “Why-- do you-- keep getting-- fucking faster?” he grunted, swinging his fists fruitlessly at her.
“Answer the question, and maybe I’ll slow down!”
“How the fuck should I know why he stays with me?! Why the hell do you want to know, anyway?”
“Because--fuck!” Rukia looked up irritably from where she had landed in the dirt after Ikkaku swept her feet out from under her. “Because we’re both horrible gremlins with partners we don’t deserve and I need advice.”
Ikkaku stuck out his lower lip as she hefted herself to her feet. “What’re you worrying for? Abarai will never leave you. He’s so far gone for you, it’s gross.”
“I’m not worried about him leaving me,” Rukia protested. “I want to do something nice for him, because I like him.”
Ikkaku made a disgusted face. “Arright, you want my relationship secrets? Here you go: I never touch his stuff. I let him put make-up on me whenever he wants. And we fuck a lot. Like, all the time. Constantly."
“He’s so much better than you, though! How do you deal with it?”
Ikkaku scratched the back of his head. “I’m not gonna talk about Yumichika right now, because I don’t talk about Yumichika, you get my drift? This is just, like, a hypothetical. But sometimes, a guy who goes out in public being gorgeous and smart and perfect all the time is kind of a mess at home, like when he’s got the avocado shit on his face, or when he’s reading those manga that make him ugly cry, or when he can’t get his feathers to come out right. Normal problems, like everybody gets, right?”
“Yeah…” Rukia said slowly, having definitely witnessed a few avocado face masks in her time.
“And even a perfect, smart, gorgeous guy sometimes needs someone to go pick up take-out, right? And to, like, talk him through a bad hair treatment. That’s the real romance, right there, is being there for the ugly stuff and never talking about it. That’s what I hear, anyway. Iba told me that. I don’t know anything about it.”
Rukia’s heart sank. Honestly, this just sounded like more shit Renji did for her, not the other way around. She was the one who was always making poor hair decisions and snuffling through romance manga. She didn’t even know how he had stood to look at her during the year she had been home with the baby, all puffy-faced and grouchy. How was she possibly both the Ikkaku and the Yumichika of their relationship?
“You know,” Ikkaku recalled, tapping his chin. “I did just think of something romantic that I do. Sometimes I write him some erotic poetry.”
“This was a terrible idea, I’m going to start hitting you again,” Rukia replied, cracking her knuckles.
“Yeah, that’s really not the way to go. I had Abarai look over some of my works, y’know, ‘cuz he’s all literary-minded and shit--”
“Is he?” Rukia frowned.
“--for a Squad 11 guy. I mean, he’s literate. In any case, he did not appreciate it.” He side-stepped one of Rukia’s kicks. “Maybe he just doesn’t like poetry about dicks. Maybe he would like it better if it were about whatever you got down there. That is not my area of expertise.”
“I am definitely going to punch you in the face now,” Rukia informed him, and then she did.
#1500 follower deleted scenes fest#this is definitely the best deleted scene of the whole bunch thank you for requesting it
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Please rant about Larycent, I love your writing and your thoughts are always extremely insightful !
OH THANKS ANON!!
SO. about the problematic babies. i am still figuring out my fascination about them because i 100% fully believe alicent is a lesbian lol and in a way, even though their interactions are *coded* as courtly romance i still think it's not as easy as that? like i don't imagine them falling in normal love. the first time they meet alicent is lonely! it's striking in that godswood scene how lonely she is, he says it himself. she is young, her father is gone. he preys on her!!! i mean, she is the queen and he has that innocent face and those delicate manners and he wears the mask of Faithful Loyal Servant who is going to be partial to HER like otto (insert daddy issues too). but in the end larys has the control of this relationship because, while alicent doesn't know a thing about larys' inner world (none of us do, thats the entire point of him), he understand this ultimate fragility about alicent: she is a queen, but she feels alone and lost - she says that to rhaenyra in episode 4, everyone looks at her and sees "the Queen" but no one sees the lady alicent.
LARYS SEES ALICENT. he sees her, he gets her, and he will manipulate and gashlight her because he knows what she wants. and larys has not been profoundly fleshed out like other characters, but i liked how this is tied to his disability. he says it to alicent, too: some people have to observe their surroundings. why?!! because the world is not safe, the world is a constant threat! whether by actual material conditions or by other people's ill intentions. because he is a horrible man, he uses this to horrible purposes <3 i don't know, for me this "you will never see me coming" aspect of larys is the funniest part of him.
i loved loved LOVED how horrified she looked when he told her of harrenhal. that was GASLIGHTING!!! he was implicitly putting the blame on her shoulders for a horrific crime she didn't commit or ask for! he fully went "oh yes my Queen, this is something i did for you. you could even say this is something we did together?" PETYR DID THAT TO SANSA WHEN HE KILLED LYSA. and she is like "DUDE. i wanted alliances! i didn't want you to start a fire and kill your entire family!!" like it's clear that she is the queen but she doesn't control him.
SO. i ship them in these circumstances. if something romantic/erotic happens in the future it has to be toxic and unhealthy and some sort of compensation of this power imbalance, a way of affirming the power they have over the other. and still better if they delude themselves and each of them think they have the upper hand. :D when in fact its not that simple!!
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Drawn Together (Prt 1) (Derek Morgan FF)
A/N: So this is the first part of my Derek Morgan fanfic.
I hope you like it. I'm sorry it's bad, it has been a very long time since i wrote fanfic and published it somewhere. So sorry if there are a lot of spelling errors or grammatical errors. English is my second language and i mostly write on mobile.
This part is not super erotic yet. Don't worry, I know that is what you guys are reading fanfic for. Next part, I got you, Boo.
Idk yet how Tumblr really works. first time here.
Please don't yell at me :')
Hope you enjoy.
Drawn Together, Part 1
Melony sat at her desk and threw her pen down. She had been working on these reports regarding their latests case for hours, and her hand started to hurt from writing. A serial killer had targeted women in his area. They were always blond, and he always killed three before disappearing for a few years and reappearing in a new city. It had taken a lot of efford, but they had caught him. He did not go down without a fight though and it had gotten quite messy, which was partly the cause of the giant pile of paperwork the team now had to work through.
Melony decided to give herself a few minutes to get a cup of coffee and a small snack to give her head a bit of time to relax.
She got up from her spot and walked to the breakroom with her mug. She placed her mug under the coffee machine and pressed a few buttons. As it started pouring coffee, she grabbed the milk from the fridge and poured some milk in her mug while the coffee was still pouring too. She put the milk back in the fridge and grabbed her mug when the coffee stopped pouring.
"Need a little break too, baby girl?" She heard a voice say behind her. She turned around to see a pair off deep brown eyes looking her way.
"Yes, my hand started hunting from all the writing. You?"
"Same," the man said and he walked towards her. He put his own cup under the coffemachine and started it.
They had been colleagues for a while now. About 8 months, Melony thought. Some people on the team had worked together for years, but even with her 8 months she felt like she was part of the family.
"I do think I'll be done soon. I am working on my last piece." She said
"Lucky you. I will probably be stuck here for a while longer."
"That sucks."
"Well, we got the guy at least, so I'm fine with some paperwork, at least we got to help people."
"True."
"How is your extra report coming along?" The man teased.
"That's the one I'm finishing up now. Thanks for that. You totally threw me under the bus." Melony said, faking her annoyance. The man smiled at her,
"What can i say? It helped us and saved us quite some time."
36 hours earlier
The team sat around the table in the conference room of the local PD. They had been discussing the profile of the killer they were hunting and Hotchner was giving out his orders to everyone.
"I want Reid and Morgan to visit the crime scene again, look for any details we might have missed the first time. Gideon and Pearson, talk to the victim's family. Find out anything you can. The rest stays here to work on the profile. JJ, ask the sherrif to call in a stetch artist to meet Pearson and Gideon at the house." Hotchner said
"Don't bother calling and artist" Derek Morgan said. Hotchner looked at him a bit confused,
"Why?"
"We are in a tiny town, it is going to take way too much time to ask one to come in from a bigger city. And Pearson can do it" Derek said and Melony looked at him when he mentioned her name, confused. Hotchner looked at her,
"Can you?"
"I… I ehm" Melony sputtered. Derek reached for her file and pulled out a piece of paper she had hidden in the back. He checked to make sure he had the right one before putting on the table to the rest of the team could see it.
"I saw her draw this on the plane based on the very few descriptives that were in the file." He said.
Hotchner grabbed the piece of paper and inspected the drawing.
"How long did this take you?" He asked Melony.
"Ehmm, about 5 minutes, i think. There wasn't a whole lot to go off of." She replied.
Hotchner looked down at the paper again,
"Morgan is right, it will take too long to get someone from a different town. Take a sketchbook with you and some supplies, make the sketch when you are with the family." He said and gave a nod to dismiss them.
"What the hell was that?" Melony asked Derek while they walked towards the exit
"I'm just helping. Mel, you have a skill we can really use."
"But did you have to put me on the spot like that?"
Derek stopped walking and looked at her,
"Baby, would you have told Hotch yourself?"
"No"
"Exactly." Derek said before he pushed open the door and walked out.
"Has Hotch talked to you about it? Your sketch ended up helping us catch the guy" Derek asked Melony as he grabbed his cup of coffee.
"He has. On the plane back he and Gideon talked for a bit. They called me over and Hotch said he wants me to follow some extra training, and he wants me to become our team's sketch artist."
"So how did i throw you under the bus, exactly?" Derek asked with a teasing grin
"You put me on the spot! Didn't give me a chance to think about whether i wanted to do it."
"But it worked out."
"You mean i got extra work"
"Hey, that usually means extra pay"
Melony didn't have a good comeback, he was right. They did offer her extra pay.
"You better make it up to me though. As an apology for putting me on the spot." She said, teasing him back. Derek looked at her with an exaggerated offended expression,
"Wow, you get extra pay but still want to bleed me dry, baby girl?" He teased.
"Oh, absolutely. I am going to milk this for a while." Melony teased back and Derek smiled.
"Fine, what do you want me to do?"
"Well, tomorrow i have my first day of training. How about you help me with some practice tomorrow night?"
Derek thought about it and smiled,
"How about I do that, and i bring a pizza? Will that make us even?" He asked
"Hhm… i don't know yet. Depends what pizza you bring."
"Which do you want me to bring?"
Melony just grinned, "if i told you that, i would make it too easy for you" she said and walked out and went back to her desk.
*
Melony sat at home, waiting for Derek to come over. He texted earlier that day to confirm the time and check her adress.
Her training had been quite intense. She had to draw a lot, sometimes with very little details to go on. Sometimes she was shown a picture of an UnSub for a fraction of a second, then she had to try and draw it from memory. Other times someone would describe a person to her for her to draw.
Despite it being a lot, and at times quite draining, she did have fun doing it.
The doorbell rang and Melony went to open it.
"Pizza delivery."
"Oh, is it with extra sausage?" Melony asked, trying not to smile too much. Derek started chuckling,
"I didn't want to make that joke." He said and Melony let him in. Derek handed her the pizza so he could take off his jacket and he put it away. Melony put the pizza on the table in her dining room.
"So, how was your first day, baby girl?"
"It was pretty good. It was intense, but what do you expect from FBI training, right? What can i get you to drink?"
"Ehm… do you have a beer?"
Melony chuckled, "I have a lot more than 'a beer'." She replied and Derek looked at her curiously. Melony opened a cabinet that was placed on the side of the room, showing him the wide array of liqours she had. "I also have wine and beer in the fridge, and a bottle of Jäger in the freezer. So, what's your poison?"
Derek looked at the cabinet in surprise,
"I did not expect that. But I'm not going to drink alone"
"Don't worry, I'll make myself something too."
"Can you do a negroni?"
"Regular or Dutch?" Melony asked.
"What's the difference?"
"The Dutch version uses genever instead of gin. It is more bitter, but the other flavours are a bit stronger as well."
"Ehm… let's start with a regular one."
"Alright, no problem. There are multiple different versions, but these two I make the most." Melony said as she dug through her cabinet for the right bottles. Once she got them she got to work.
"Any specific reason why?"
"The regular one because it is common, and the Dutch one because my mom is Dutch."
"Ah, okay."
Melony placed the finished drink in front of Deker. He grabbed the glass and took a little sip. Impressed, he put the glass down again.
"Wow, baby, i am discovering a lot of your talents this week. What's next? Are you an accomplished musician too?" Derek asked teasingly. Melony chuckled,
"I will have to disappoint you. I have tried to learn to play an instrument as a kid because my mom thought it would be good to learn to play music, but i suck." Melony said as she sat down across from Derek after she made her own drink, a raspberry daiquiri. Derek smiled a bit,
"A pink drink for a lady?"
"Oh, it's just because i don't really like the bitter drinks. This one is more sweet and sour."
Derek gave a slight nod and smiled a bit.
"So what pizza did you bring?" Melony asked.
"Well, i decided to just play it save with pepperoni."
"That always works."
Derek opened the box and they both grabbed a slice.
"So, how do you want me to help with your training?"
"Simple. Describe someone to me, i try to draw them. You check to see if i got close."
"Sounds doable. Someone we both know?"
"Doesn't have to be someone i know. It can just be any random person. It's actually better if i don't know them so i don't get biased if i think i figure out who you are describing."
"Okay."
Derek put the last piece of his slice in his mouth while thinking about who to describe. Once he picked someone, he swallowed, cleared his throat and started describing them.
Melony drew out what he described. Big ears, small ears. A hook nose, dubble chin, tiny beady eyes. Almost anything came by. Sometimes it was a real person, sometimes a character from a film, sometimes he was just naming random features to see what she came up with.
They ate pizza while practicing and sometimes Melony made them a new drink.
"Baby, you make it look easy. You got just about every single one i described to you really close. It can't be that hard" Derek said after the fifteenth drawing, and his fourth drink, curious as to how she would react. Melony opened her mouth to defend the amount of time and efford she had put in to hone her skill, but then decided against it. She closed her mouth, flipped the page in her sketchbook to a blank one and put in in front of Derek and held out her pencil to him, a daring expression on her face.
Derek looked at the pencil, thinking about what to do,
"I can't." He said
"Why?"
He held up his glass, "I had more than two drinks, it's not safe"
Melony chuckled, the alcohol slightly getting to her,
"It's not a car. You'll be fine"
"Nope, not gonna do it. Safety first."
"Come on. I want to see your hidden talents" Melony said with a sly smile, her eyes half closed and sparkling in the light. If he hadn't known any better he would think she was trying to seduce him. But this was Melony, she didn't do seducing as far as he knew. He had never heard her talk about a man in her life. No boyfriends, no flings, not even a date or a creepy guy at a bar, let alone seen her with anyone. It made him curious. She was just secretive, or was there more going on?
"I have many talents." Derek said lowly and grinned a little bit, "how many of them do you want to see?"
Melony swallowed at his different tone. She didn't know exactly what he was implying, but his voice went from her ears straight to her core, and it put images in her head that really shouldn't be there.
"All of them." She breathed, not realizing she actually said it out loud. Derek grinned more.
"All of them? Well, i don't know if we can get to all of them tonight." He said and leaned closer to her. Melony looked away from him. Looking him in the eye was putting more and more dark thoughts in her mind. Thoughts that would lead the two of them to her bedroom. Thoughts that made her want to break so many rules.
"H-how about we start with seeing if you can draw. You said it was easy." Melony said, hoping to calm her mind a bit.
"Okay. Ehm, Could i have another drink?" He asked. He did sound thirsty. Melony looked at his glass and then made the mistake of looking Derek in the eye. It took all her strength tobreak eye contact, stand up and bring his glass with her to fill it up. As she walked to the counter she used to prepare their drinks, her mind started to wander. With each step more thoughts entered her mind.
Would he be a good kisser? What would he taste like? Was he so muscular all over his body? What would he look like naked? How would he feel on top of her?
As she started to imagine them together, she did not pay enough attention to her walking and she almost tripped.
Derek noticed, got up and walked to her. He put his hand on her shoulder,
"Are you okay?"
Melony nodded, "I'm fine." She said. But she was anything buy fine. Him touching her shoulder sent surges of electricity through her, and she couldn't help but imagine his hands all over her.
"Are you sure?"
Melony nodded, not trusting her words. Derek didn't really believe her and turned her around and made her look at him.
"You're not. Do you need anything?" He asked. Melony looked up at those deep, gorgeous brown orbs of his and only one word kept being repeated in her mind. Why did he have to phrase it like that? She tried to push her thoughts away, telling herself it was no use, that it was insane and she had to stop thinking like that, but she couldn't help it. Her body screamed it, and then she said it,
"You"
#derek morgan#derek morgan fanfiction#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfiction#idk how to tag this#i'm new to tumblr
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One Shot Smut Challenge Part One
Jealousy Gets You Everything - Cillian Murphy X Fem!Reader One Shot
Warning - jealousy / breeding kink / toys / BDSM
Taglist @queenshelby @margoo0 @being-worthy @peakyscillian @peakyciills @janelongxox @elenavampire21 @ysmmsy @cloudofdisney @lauren-raines-x @misscarolineshelby @screemqueen @peaky-cillian @misselsbells06 @datewithgianni @heidimoreton @jardinsecos @bitchwhytho @gypsy-girl-08 @queenofkings1212 @look-at-the-soul @emznelly @shelbygurl
"Will you please tell me what's wrong?" Cillian begged, watching you sit at the kitchen table tracing your finger over the rim of your full wine glass. You couldn't stomach it. You couldn't stomach anything after what you'd just seen.
He'd warned you. Of course he'd warned you. He always told you about his sex scenes. But you weren't prepared for the level of feelings it ignited in you when you saw it.
The way she choked him.
The lust in his eyes.
The power she had over him.
Married for three years, together for almost seven, add a 2 year old daughter into the mix - sex had become more of a quick fumble in the dark (at your insistence) once a week if you were lucky. He was either working, or you were exhausted from chasing 2 year old Lily around the house.
As for looking at you the way he looked at her in that scene... Although you knew it was Tommy and not Cillian, his face still looked the same. He used to look at you like that...
"Y/n? Talk to me, please?"
You burst into tears. Gut wrenching sobs from the pit of your stomach. He was on his knees in front of you in seconds, pulling you into a warm embrace that felt safe. Secure. But fuck, you wanted more than that!
So you took a deep breath, swallowed a massive glug of the wine... And told him. Feeling a weight off you shoulders as the words left your lips.
"I see..." He blinked, before a smirk stretched over his lips.
"Why are you smiling? This isn't funny?" You choked, feeling a level of embarrassment you'd never felt before.
"No. You're right. And I'm not laughing am I?"
"You're mocking me."
"I'm neglecting you."
"What?"
"Oh my sweet little y/n..." He bit his lip and took your hand. Pulling you onto your feet, he led you down the hall and up the stairs. The look in his eyes was sending shivers down your spine and you weren't sure if that was a good thing or not...
He led you into your bedroom, before pushing you onto the bed. You fell back with a gasp and tried to sit up, but he shook his head.
"Stay right there. I'll be right back. Do. Not. Move."
You lay there for what felt like hours but was probably no more than five minutes. The wetness between your legs and the deep throb you felt in your clit was almost too much to bear.
"My needy girl needs to be taught a lesson, don't you think?" He was back in the room suddenly holding a box. A box you brought with you when you moved into this house after you married but forgot you had.
"A lesson?" His body moved to cover you, his nose circling yours. His hair tickling your face.
"Jealousy gets you everything," he growled, giving you his best Tommy Shelby voice that made your pussy clench. You leaned up to capture his lips in yours but he pulled away with a deep chuckle.
"No baby, tonight you follow my instructions. All of them. Understood?"
"Yes..."
"Yes what?"
"Yes sir," you bit your lip and watched him reach into the box, pulling out a black plug with a diamante base. Followed by a purple dildo and a bottle of lubricant. Each one placed on the bed beside you. One more reach in and he paused, a sly grin on his face and an eyebrow raised in the air before he pulled out the black and red paddle.
The box discarded across the room, he patted the paddle against his hand and beckoned you up with his finger. He backed away as you stood, and cast his eyes over you.
"Strip."
"Cill..."
"The lights stay on. Strip." The look in his eyes was both menacing and erotic - you couldn't refuse him, even though your insecurities were screaming at you.
Taking your dress down your body, you felt his eyes devouring you. Watching as you peeled your bra and panties off, standing before him completely bare as you followed his next set of instructions.
"On the bed."
"On your hands and knees."
"Ass in the air."
"Fuck baby, already wet for me?" He groaned, tracing a single finger through your folds. You felt the heat pooling in your abdomen, trying to ignore the fact that your body must look horrific in this position... After a c section two years ago, you certainly weren't the size ten you were when you married...
Suddenly his lips were at your ear.
"Your safe word is Lemonade... You say it, I stop immediately, no questions asked," he whispered, tenderly. You nodded, before flinching at the feeling of the cold paddle sliding against your bare ass.
"Jealousy is a sin, is it not?"
"Yes sir..."
"What do we do to sinners?"
"We punish them.. sir..."
One hard smack against your ass had you crying out in both shock and ecstacy. Another followed, a little harder. Each one in succession slightly firmer than the last. Occasionally you felt him press his erection against your thigh and you felt your core throb with anticipation.
"You're fucking dripping, y/n," he groaned, sliding the hard edge of the paddle between your soaked pussy lips, gently scraping your swollen clit, making your body flinch and a deep moan leave your chest.
"Ass in the air," he ordered, and your body complied in earnest. You heard the lubricant bottle open, and a few moments later the plug was teasingly tickled over your exposed ass cheeks and lower back.
"Fuck... Cillian, please..."
"Shh baby, relax, I'll take care of you don't worry," he whispered, before you felt the hard point of the plug pash slowly past your almost virginal again hole - he'd not explored here since before your daughter was born, the thrill of him being there again was almost too much and you swore you nearly came as it pushed past the barrier.
A deep, almost-satisfied groan came from deep within you as it buried deep.
"My beautiful girl stuffed to the hilt..." Another smack of the paddle near the exposed diamante had you clutching the bed sheets, and you heard a 'click' sound behind you. Turning round, you saw him with his phone out taking a photo.
"Something to keep me going when I'm away," he winked, taking photos of different angles, making sure to capture the red paddle marks on your ass and the glint of the plug. He dipped two fingers inside your needy pussy, snapping more photos as he slowly withdrew his fingers.
"You're so fucking delicious, you know that?" He smirked, licking his fingers clean.
"Please Cill...." Your legs were shaking from the sheer desperation - you had never felt so turned on in your life.
"My little slut wants to cum?"
"Please... Baby.."
"What?"
"Sir, please... Sir..."
Another smack of the paddle and you were practically whimpering now.
"Are you calling me baby, or are you asking me for one?"
Your head turned to look at him, his eyes full of not lust, but unadulterated passion and pure fire.
"Answer my question," he pushed, dipping two fingers deep into you and over your swollen clit.
"Asking... Baby... Do it..."
"Want me to put a baby in this tight little womb of yours? Maybe that'll teach you..."
"Teach me?" Your voice had never been this shaky. Neither had your legs...
He leaned closer to your ear, his fingers pressing over your clit now as your knees nearly gave way.
"That there's only one woman in the world perfect enough to carry my children," he whispered in your ear and your body reacted with a blinding orgasm. Your knees buckled underneath you as your body shook and a cry of ecstacy loud enough to wake the dead left your throat.
"Good girl, had to get you ready to take me, didn't I?" He chuckled watching you come completely undone, writhing on the bed from his fingers overstimulating you.
He turned you over and stripped his clothes quickly. The sight of his hard length rigid and firm against his abdomen.
"Sit up, open your mouth." Once again your body complied automatically. Sitting at eye level with his hard cock, you opened your mouth. He fisted his length a few times before sliding the tip over your open lips, gliding it between them with ease. Gripping your hair, eyes locked with yours, you felt it slowly edge to the back of your throat as you fought against your gag reflex. Tears in your eyes, your mascara definitely leaving a trail, he looked down at you and grinned as he almost bottomed out.
"My pretty girl likes my cock down her throat, doesn't she?" He gasped as he began to move his hips, fucking your mouth.
The moans from deep within your chest were almost enough to send him over the edge, so he pulled out and lay you flat on your back, your thighs pinned to your chest by his strong hand as he took the large vibrator and turned it on. Another hand suddenly pulled a set of handcuffs from next to him, how you missed those you'd never know, but they were quickly attached to your wrists, looped through the headboard.
"They call this the mating press.. you know why?" He slid the vibrator through your pulsing walls and watched your head fly back. As your mouth opened, he stuffed your mouth with your panties to muffle the sound.
"Now you can't say your safe word, so you're going to have to think of something else. But based on how close to another orgasm you are, I don't think you need to, do you?"
You shook your head quickly, the vibrator sending stars into your vision.
He pulled the vibrator out and kneeled in front of you, his cock sliding easily through your folds as he filled you, bottoming out in seconds.
"They call this the mating press, because it's perfect for fucking a baby into you.. that what you want my little lady? My seed inside you so deep, making your belly grow with my baby inside it?"
You nodded furiously, his words were like tiny electric shocks through your entire system.
Three hard slams deep inside you made you cry out, biting down on your own panties as he continued his assault on your pussy, fucking you harder than you could remember him ever doing.
"So fucking tight, I'm gonna fucking ruin you," he panted, his hips pistoning in and out of you, the plug pushing his cock higher, angling it perfectly to hit that sweet spot only he'd ever managed to find.
His fingers under your thighs, pinching your nipples and tweaking them. Gripping the flesh of your breast as he fucked you mercilessly.
"Can.. feel.. you clenching me..." He gasped between thrusts.
You were chanting his name, muffled by the gag, as your body started to quiver.
"Good girl, cum on my cock and daddy will fuck a baby into you tonight, cum for me..."
Your juices flowed from you like a river as you came, and he fucked you through it, not letting up the pace of his hard thrusts.
"Oh fuck... That's it, that's my girl, yes... Oh fuck yes..." His eyes locked on yours as his cock erupted deep inside you, painting your walls white with his hot release.
He paused for a few minutes, making sure his cock fully emptied inside you, your walls squeezing him dry. Slowly he eased out, and unfolded you. Untying your hands, smirking slightly at the red marks the cuffs had left on your wrists. He removed the gag, and the plug carefully, watching his seed leak from you, pushing it back in with his fingers.
"Come here baby," he lifted you up and carried your aching body to the armchair in the corner of the room. Sitting you on it gently, he went to the ensuite bathroom and you heard hot water running into your spa bath.
"Cillian..." He came back moments later and knelt down, stroking your face gently.
"You're the most beautiful woman in the world, you know that?"
Your eyes met his, full of love and desire, full of that intensity you'd missed so much.
"You were perfect when we met. You were more perfect when I married you. Then somehow you got even more perfect - carrying our baby. The strongest woman I know, the most amazing mother and wife I could have dreamed of."
Tears were in your eyes as he spoke to you.
"Let's get you cleaned up, then we rest. I'll call my mum in the morning, I'm sure she'll take Lily for another night..."
"Why another night?"
"Because you and I aren't leaving this house until I've fucked you in every room inside it."
#cillian murphy#cillian smut#cillian fanfic#cillian x fem!reader#cillian murphy x smut#cillian x smut#cillian murphy fanfiction#cillian x oc#cillian murphy x reader#cillian murphy x requests
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Hello! I'm watching The Alienist- Angel of Darkness, and I keep thinking of a fic where laszlo's wife!reader just gave birth and this case worries the poor man more than usual, because their baby is in danger and he can't get into the assassin's mind. Perhaps the reader could offer to breastfeed laszlo, and they have an in-depth conversation about the workings of the killer's mind and why the reader herself enjoys nurturing her husband. Perhaps it would even become a habit after the case was solved and every time Doctor Kreizler wanted some milk, he would let her know with a touch just below her breast that would go unnoticed in public as a gesture of affection? I think I thought about it too much, what do you think about writing about it?
The Marriage of Happiness [Dr Laszlo Kreizler x Wife!Reader]
Word count: 3.6k
Warnings: erotic lactation, breastfeeding kink, mention of other kinks and of murder
A/N: What do I think about writing it? I think THANKY YOU because I could write Laszlo having a boobie obsession for the rest of my life. I do think about it daily and it is just THE kink for him (as poor @cazzyimagines knows how obsessed I am).
The case of studies mentioned are taken from psychology books of the time.
I don''t know what point you're with Angel of Darkness so I am not giving out too much.
The night was dark and tensed, not a soul on the streets of the residential area you lived in with your husband, the only light up the one in your bedroom.
You became mother three months before welcoming the first little Kreizler of her generation. It was hard but worth every second, every moment of the pregnancy and the delivery your husband was with you. You were lucky, you felt lucky to be with a man like Laszlo: open minded, modern, charming and righteous.
You smiled walking around the room as you lulled your baby humming a soft lullaby, the baby observing you with dazzling eyes, you could see she was tired and the melody kept her attentive but also lulled her to a place of comfort.
You swayed slowly in a gentle waltzer, your arms embracing the tiny body wrapped up into the finest white clothing. You yourself wore your white nightdress with a dark green cover up that Laszlo gifted you, it was slightly bigger in size so you’d use it though the whole pregnancy, your hair loosely braided.
The baby opened her mouth making a soft sound, she was calm and relaxed, to see her like this brought you an immense joy.
You heard steps approaching to the door, the house was empty since Stevie was with Laszlo and the cook you hired was in her quarters, you wouldn’t be worried if your husband wasn’t working on a case of abducted babies, but then you followed Laszlo’s common sense and listened instead of letting your mind worry. You listened to the steps coming one after the other, the weight of them, the pace.
You smiled to yourself as you guessed right, your husband appeared on the door frame and the shadow over his face disappeared for a moment meeting your standing figure with the baby.
Since the case begun he refused to have any new staff in the house, he brought the bed of the baby in your bedroom, which wasn’t common back then, and every night sent Stevie to roam around the streets before going to bed to see if there was any obscure presence.
“My love” he said with a smile as he walked his way toward you undoing his jacket as you offered him a look of the falling asleep baby. His left hand gently caressing the little chest to feel the breathe of life in it. The baby blinked at him and smiled. Your baby girl was an early smiler, she smiled in her first month which just ripped off her father soul, tucked it in her little pocket and sold him forever. He was already ecstatic to be a father, only the announcement of your pregnancy got him wild, a mix of worry and tenderness always over him. The constant fear to be losing it. To lose what you brought to his life, not only his daughter but that happiness, the home feeling, the meaning to have something to come back to at night.
He loved you like a flower loves the water, he loved you more than metaphors can explain. He closed his eyes pressing his forehead against your temple, you rocked the baby gently in your arms as she relaxed, the sleep over her even if the presence of her father stirred her a bit.
“I am so worried for her” he murmured, he couldn’t cope with it anymore. The pressure to be following that case.
Sara told him to drop it, but he couldn’t. He owed it to Martha Napp, he owed him to his own child. To be in the case put his darling baby into the spotlight, but the best chance to solve it and avoid the menace of losing the apple of his eyes was to fight the crime from the inside.
And yet, he couldn’t. He couldn’t get inside it.
He looked up and noticed your eyes on him, you detected the twist into his mind, the fear, the tremble of his intentions.
You kissed his cheek as his head was bowed slightly before slowly moving away to lean the baby into her cradle.
“Get comfortable” you urged him softly as he nodded to you undoing his jacket and his waist coat shrugging them off his shoulders as you adjusted the baby into her usual sleeping position, you pulled the covers over her caressing her head full of dark blonde hair like her father had as a child. You brushed them gently as she stirred and relaxed again, a soft sound coming from her mouth. She was well dressed, well fed and happy, you knew your child had all the possibilities in life to be the most charming and smartest woman of her times.
You moved the little veils on top of the crib to shield her from the dim lights of the room before pacing your way back to your husband.
Laszlo was sat on your shared bed. His eyes focused in the nothing in front of him. His waistcoat and jacket abandoned as he wore only his candid white shirt and dark pants.
You picked the hooked needle as you slowly bowed to your knees, he blinked surprised for a moment as you begun to undo his boots silently. You knew him, you gave him time to express himself. He was elaborating still, collecting ideas after a day spent talking back and forth with Sara.
“I saw the body” he said as you looked up.
“The body of Martha Napp’s baby” he added and you frowned, the poor woman, you couldn’t imagine yourself in her position. You’d probably be accused of murder too because you’d probably become feral if somebody touched your baby.
“Are you sure it is her baby?”
You knew he was sure, but the hope still fazed you.
“The child was poisoned, the deadly pallor was evident but Martha mentioned her child had an identifying contusion” he took a pause, he licked his lips as you could almost see him relieve the scene in his mind “A benign hemangioma under her left axilla”
He looked at you, to see the corpse of a baby, a baby that could be his, to find out a baby girl was abducted and this time in a well known residential area. The anxiety took over him. He was pestered by dark worries, images that saw you in a state of loss and disruption like the poor Señora Linares.
His eyes rested onto you, your calm firmness made him shake at times. His strong and aggressive demeanour might show him as the rock of the couple, but you are. You’re the one that can overcome things, that can see clearly when his mind is clouded.
“Might that child soul rest now with her mother, if you allow me I will take care of organising the burial along with the mother’s corpse as soon as the Isaacson’s have concluded their inspections on it”
He looked at you, a soft smile crept on him. Your thoughtful self always finding the cure to the pain. He saw the failure and you found the ultimate resolution. You could not join them in life, let it be in death.
You gave him a warm smile before finishing with both his boots and pulling them out, your hands slowly tracing his calves and ankles resting your chin on his knee to interject his eyes.
“Darling”
He blinked, he zoned out again and your voice called him back.
“I apologise” he only said
You stood up, his eyes lingering over your body for a moment. You healed like a true champion after the delivery, in few weeks you were back on your feet like nothing, in a month you were able to attend events. Your energy and vitality made you seem immortal to his eyes, which triggered his fears of loss even more.
Something so special, so strong like you, the idea to see you broken in any shape or form poisoned his soul and tortured his heart.
“Laszlo” once again, you called him back to reality as you sat beside him “you’re not thinking clearly”
He huffed softly, you were right.
“I can’t focus” he admitted finally taking your hand in his “I even upset the señora with my questions, enraged Sara, I feel like an headless chicken rushing around to find answers I can’t deal with. The scientific community protecting a butcher, John doing all he can at the newspaper and yet I am providing nothing to this investigation but background noise” he frowned deeply.
You could tell he was doing it for Martha and for you. He wanted to protect you and he tried to keep you far from all that darkness.
“Come” you said as you moved to your spot on the bed relaxing your legs as you adjusted some pillows behind your back “come on”
You hushed him and he obeyed quietly crawling on the bed, his frown still present. You hated to see him like that. Usually he was able to keep cases of study and worries outside of the bedroom, but this case was too personal.
You smiled at him as you undid the silly bow on your neck that kept the upper part of your night gown up. It was a maternity gown so to undo that little knot exposed the sensual curve of your breasts in a second. His eyes indulged over that little silky cloth twisted around your finger and the stars of little moles on your chest, he knew each of them by memory, he knew the scent of your perfume and the oils you use after bathing.
He looked up at you with a questioning look, he mindlessly run the tip of his tongue over his bottom lip when you exposed your juicy breasts. He always had a thing for them, he was always enchanted by the feminine chest as the highest form of femininity, big or small, that sensual shape was the epitome of life, of the charms of Eve in the Garden of Eden, the Mother Earth personified into the sacred body of his wife.
His eyes darted up back at you, a silent question on him as you didn’t let his confusion overwhelm you, you fought it with calmness and temperance.
“I know only one way to calm a restless Kreizler”
Your words would have made him smile as your open arms weren’t such a charming offer. He run his tongue again over his upper lip this time, using his left arm as support he slowly slipped closer to you.
His face leaned to yours as you didn’t seem to have changed your mind.
Somebody else would have maybe found it repulsive, a man of simple and good heart like John would have felt that kind of attention misplaced.
But not him.
He lowered himself over your chest adjusting into a nice position as you used few extra pillows you had there to ensure him a comfortable stay. His nose gently brushed over the inside of your chest, his hot breath hitting over your skin as he looked up at you once more and once more a welcoming smile followed his gaze.
He leaned down once again, lips parted to gently capture your nipple among them. Your mouth gaping lightly as he sucked a bit too much at the beginning sending shivers down your spine but just like any child his sucking revealed his anxiety to be fed, his fear and his need of protection.
You wrapped one arm around him as with the other you brushed his hair, your nails gently scratching his scalp to relax him, fingers combing his always well kept hair.
You watched his eyes flutter closed as you resumed your usual humming. It wasn’t a real lullaby, it was some of a rhythm you got stuck in your head.
“You’re here and I am here, our baby is safe from the world outside and nothing bad can happen” you narrated softly to him “you’re the most amazing man I have ever met, I know that the clarity of your thinking will come back. Just stop the world for a moment, it will all be back when the time comes right”
He hummed softly as you fell silent gently caressing him as you observed him lovingly, the fingers of his weak right hand toying with your braid. His beard hitching a bit in the beginning but you got soon used to it, you didn’t speak up anymore, you felt him relax more and more and you also did. This new kind of bond felt pleasurable and sweet, you felt to have reached a new kind of intimacy which is all you could hope for your marriage.
The time passed in silence, not a sound disturbing you until Laszlo’s relaxed body stretched lightly, the common knowledge telling you that the baby is fed.
He pulled back slowly before resting a kiss over your chest in a silent thank you.
He rested his head over your lap observing you like some Madonna staring at him with you gentle tenderness, not even Michelangelo could have grasped the beauty of your act or the absolute unfiltered love of your gaze.
“Was it pleasurable for you?”
He asked as you smiled gently caressing his cheek and his beard
“It was, you are really gentle” you answered. Another thing that you loved about your marriage was the unfiltered expression of feelings. You both looked for clarity through the eyes of your partner.
“Does it makes me your child?”
You smiled understandingly. This is your Laszlo, inquiring, curious, witty.
“No, no I don’t have a feeling that resemblance to breastfeed a child, it is more deep, more bound into my mind as an act of” you stopped thinking about it.
“Communion?”
He dared and you nodded as that was the right word.
“There’s a 1903 study, a German alienist suggested practicing erotic lactation as a way to deepen the relationship between husband and wife in a book called Die Offenbarung im Weibe, quite of a title I’d say, but he advised it as a good way to family plan, to give both the partners pleasure and he focused most of his studies over the idea of women’s sexual satisfaction being vital to the creation of an happy marriage.”
“It pleases me, I won’t deny it and it is a way that makes me feel you closer to me but in a more primal way, closer to the way sex works but with a different meaning”
He nodded as he toyed still with your brain slowly, a little fetish he just noticed in himself still doomed by the charm of unfiltered pure femininity.
Long hair, breasts, welcoming hips, all details that attracted him and drawn him toward you.
“There’s a study case, a man, a very wealthy one, he was obsessed with female hair. The smell, the composition, the touching” he paused as he toyed with yours among his fingers “He wouldn’t be able to suppress his desire, he confessed me his deepest fantasy was to have an orgasm while kissing the female hair and burying his head through them. It was peculiar but not harmful until he got himself a pocket knife, one of those not even good for a little pickpocketing but just as good to be able to cut some ladies’s hair in a crowd”
You kept caressing his hair yourself, probably moved also by the story, observing it and enjoying the texture.
“Do you think the killer of children needs to posses his fetish then?”
He nodded as you’re so smart.
“The possession is part of the final abdication of a person to their fetish, to be up to crime to own the desired being just proves the final commitment to the satisfaction of one’s desires” he explained to you and he paused now almost asking to himself “why would somebody steal a child then?”
You turned around looking at the crib where your baby girl rested.
“Because my crib is empty” you said and his eyes widened lightly.
“Tell me more, try to imagine it”
You frowned lightly as you moved your hands away from him, making distance, imagining the loneliness of empty arms, the excruciating pain of having a child and then not having it anymore.
“I need to give my love to my child” you said then taking a pause, your eyes staring to some unknown spot of the room “and if my child is not there, I will make sure that there will be”
Laszlo sat up as he stared at you.
“But that child won’t resemble you, your child was special and peculiar in its own way, this child grows up, changes, blabbers words while yours didn’t”
He pushed this image in you as you came to the only reasonable deduction you’d do if you were in such a state
“Then that is not my child” you said only “my child is somewhere else and this one is an impostor”
Laszlo nodded “So you get rid of it as soon as the reality outgrows the fantasy”
He concluded.
You looked at him as he stared back at you, a woman, the killer must be a woman that lost a child or got it taken away from her. She finds surrogates and dismisses them, she probably never saw her baby grow so they can’t grow.
“What would I do without you?”
You smiled at his words “you’d be completely lost, we both know about it” you said kissing his lips having a taste of your own medicine “now get into your night clothing, you’ll see Sara tomorrow to give her this new perspective.”
He smiled, not even a trace of the worried and confused Laszlo that stepped I the room before. He was back to his senses, his mind active, he could see with clarity.
- - - - - - -
The case unveiled itself, proof after proof, run after run, document after document he came to the solution.
He was proud, you and the baby were safe and now he could go back to the everyday.
“I don’t see the point Laszlo, you have proved yourself enough against him” John said as he stared up at his annoyed features s you served him some more tea.
John looked at you like why are you not stopping him but you just smiled it off relaxing in the loveseat beside your husband as John shook his shoulders like an annoyed bird.
“A man like Dr Markoe after all he did holding a public lecture with the anguishing title of Murder, Madness and Motherhood?” Laszlo snapped back at John “please, the least I can do is to humiliate him in front of the whole academic arena”
Laszlo leaned back smiling at his friend like he was just a poor fool.
“He will again fight on you, you know he always picks up on you for treating mostly children and being part of the investigation, you get heated with him and you lose your control”
John seemed only to know reasons to get Laszlo to desist, you understood him from your part, your husband was a fiery character and he hardly forgive people with quick and poor judgements. You also noticed he became way more aggressive toward Markoe since before the case, he always depicted pregnant women as prone to lose control, foolish and behaving like animals that had to be kept on a tight leash, it all in particular when you were expecting.
John’s tsunami of words couldn’t be stopped he had a reason not to do anything but your attention was quickly taken away by the soft touch of Laszlo’s hand on your side, just above the hem of your corset, his thumb tracing the side of your boob giving you a shiver as you already knew perfectly what he was demanding.
You could now tell that John actually made him feel unsure or at least unsettled him, he needed comfort and energies to face his enemy now.
Sara groaned making herself heard for the first time, she noticed his gesture and found it actually cute as she could never wish Laszlo with somebody more perfected than you. Your calmness matched his fiery nature, you talked when he needed to think, you smiled when he couldn’t. You allowed him to be more himself than he had ever been.
“Let’s go John, you’re being so obnoxious, at what time we will see the butchery of the doctor?”
You quickly answered to her giving her a gentle smile as she put John to silence.
She asked as she stood up and John groaned following her “See you there” John said still saying how useless it was to still go after that man.
Laszlo stood up escorting them to the exit and then coming back to the living room. You sat there like he left you, he would close the door behind his back locking it before crossing the room with long steps and close the curtains letting the darkness wrap around you. Your fingers slowly undoing your shirt as his shape takes again form in front of you as he turns on one lamp in the corner of the room before moving closer to you again, eyes shining even in the obscurity as his fingers finally meet with your skin once you undid the first knots on your corset.
“Give me life” he would plead to you before lacing his lips your nipple once more.
You knew from the first suck on your nipple how Markoe held no chance on today’s debate.
Tagged @cazzyimagines @lieutenantn @handmaiden-of-mischief @thesunflowersutra @zemomybeloved @fictionlandslanddreams@charistory @greeneyedblondie44 @apparrio @hb8301 @whatawildone @rhymerhymerhyme @thehuiabird @lilith-blackrose @unbeatablecurlgirl @obsidianlaszlo @alindeluce @zemosimp05 @baronesszemo-blackwood @nocapesdahling @everythingbeginsineternity-blog
#dr laszlo kreizler#dr laszlo kreizler drabble#dr laszlo kreizler x you#dr kreizler x reader#dr laszlo kreizler imagine#dr laszlo kreizler x reader#dr kreizler#laszlo kreizler fic#laszlo kreizler x y/n#laszlo kreizler fanfic#laszlo kreizler fanfiction#laszlo kreizler x you#laszlo kreizler imagine#laszlo kreizler x reader#laszlo kreizler headcanons#tw: lactation kink
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I had a crush on Ernest Cline, the author of "nerd porn auteur" and "ready player one" 😬😖 I was stupid enough to think his nerd porn poem was sweet. it took me 3 months to realise he is a loser 👎
i had never even heard of nerd porn auteur until this ask and i actually think everyone needs to read it now here i copy and pasted it for u all here please read
I've noticed that there don't seem to be any porno movies
that are made for guys like me.
All the porn I've come across
was targeted at beer-swilling sports bar dwelling alpha-males
Men who like their women stupid and submissive
Men who can only get it up for monosyllabic cock-hungry nymphos
with gargantuan breasts and a three-word vocabulary
Adult films are populated with these collagen-injected
liposuctioned women
Many of whom have resorted to surgery and self-mutilation
in an attempt to look the way they have been told to look.
These aren't real women. They're objects.
And these movies aren't erotic. They're pathetic.
These vacuum-headed fuck bunnies don't turn me on.
They disgust me.
And it's not that I'm against pornography.
I mean, I'm a guy. And guys need porn.
Fact.
"Like a preacher needs pain, like a needle needs a vein,"
Guys need porn.
But I don't wanna watch this misogynist he-man woman-hater porn.
I want porno movies that are made with guys like me in mind:
Guys who know that the sexiest thing in the world
is a woman who is smarter than you are.
You can have the whole cheerleading squad,
I want the girl in the tweed skirt and the horn-rimmed glasses:
Betty Finnebowski, the valedictorian.
Oh yes.
First I want to copy her Trig homework,
and then I want to make mad, passionate love to her
for hours and hours
until she reluctantly asks if we can stop
because she doesn't want to miss Battlestar Galactica.
Summa cum laude, baby!
That is what I call erotic.
But do you ever see that kind of a woman in a contemporary adult film?
No.
Which is why I'm going to start writing and directing Geek Porno.
I shall be the quintessential Nerd Porn Auteur.
And the women in my porno movies will be the kind
that drive nerds like me mad with desire.
I'm talking about the girls that used to fuck up the grading curve.
The girls in the Latin Club and the National Honor Society.
Chicks with weird clothes, braces, four eyes, and 4.0 GPAs.
Brainy articulate bookworms, with MENSA cards in their purses
and chips on their shoulders.
My porn starlets will come in all shapes and sizes.
My porn starlets will be too busy working on their PhD to go to the gym.
In my kind of porno movies the girls wouldn't even have to get naked.
They'd just take the guys down to the rec room and
beat them repeatedly at chess
and then talk to them for hours about Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle
or the underlying social metaphors in the Aliens movies.
Buy stock in some hand cream companies
because there is about to be a major shortage.
And I'm not just talking about straight porn. Oh no.
There should be fuck films for my nerd brethren
of all sexual orientations.
Gay nerd porn flicks with titles like "Dungeons and Drag-queens."
This idea is a fucking gold mine.
I am gonna make millions,
because this country is full of database programmers
and electronics engineers
and they aren't getting the loving they so desperately need.
And you can help . . .
If you're an intelligent woman is interested in breaking into the adult film industry,
and if you can tell me the name of Luke Skywalker's home planet,
then you are hired.
It doesn't matter if you think you're overweight or unattractive.
It doesn't matter if you don't think you're beautiful.
You are beautiful. . .
And I will make you a star.
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B D J O V for Donnie, Karl and Alcina? (yes I am in love, no I dont have regrets uwu)
My 3 loves? Well why not! And pls enjoy the ficlet styles I’m going to opt for when doing dirty secrets! This is a little long so is going under the cut.
🩸🍷Alcina Dimitrescu🩸🍷
B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and on the other)
A bit of an odd one here but she loves backs, like your actual back. The line of your spine, if you have those back dimples, ufff. She loves the shape of it if you’re on the more curvier side, she loves the skin, and your rolls, and any stretch marks. Just picture that elegant hand of hers ghosting over your back, nails maybe even claws.
On herself, well Alcina is aware of her assets and she’s very aware of her chest, both she’s quite proud of but she’s really proud of her figure over all.
D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
There was a pretty seamstress in the village who always was brought up to the castle to help with her dresses. She was a pretty thing in Alcina’s eyes, very much her type. When your making or fixing or measuring a tailor made outfit for a 9ft+ woman well it gets tricky and a little more handsy than usual. Alcina didn’t mind, the seamstress didn’t either. It was interesting following simple commands even if they were asked upon her with nothing but grace and poise.
So as Alcina sat for the 40th time to have something around her neck marked to be fixed, she had to stand between her legs to best approach and see the mistake. Only sitting did she have the best chance at seeing her at a more eye to eye level (well as best as it could be).
She isn’t dumb, she knows curiosity, want and lust like the back of her hand. Sees the nervous swallow of the seamstress whenever hands glide across her chest. The whispered ‘pardon my lady’ when she rests a palm on Alcina’s throat and takes a needle to the neckline with all the gentleness she can muster. Of course it’s the moment to prick her finger, the quiet hiss and scent is enough to alert Alcina and without waiting for her to fuss she takes that bleeding digit and kisses it, tastes the bead of blood, all while looking straight at her. When she still sees lust there, oh does she pull her closer.
One of her maids walks in about twenty minutes later, an array of materials in her arms so she doesn’t quite catch how the Lady of the castle smooths her dress and tries not to laugh, chest heaving a little and legs closing a tad. The maid greets her with her usual honorifics before leaving the requested materials, she notices the seamstress isn’t there and arches a brow at the room. “Lavatory” is all Alcina says before the maid makes a question. She nods but feels something isn’t right with the current picture but still leaves.
Once gone.
The seamstress crawls out from under Alcina’s skirt, mouth shiny, hair disheveled and nice set of teeth marks at her bosom.
It becomes a frequent thing after that.
J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)
It’s not to say she needs to because she sincerely feels she has anybody at her beck and call who is willing ready and able. But on the rare occasion she indulges in some self care, it’s mostly in her luxurious tub. Feeling the warm water, her hair clean and smelling of that weeks chosen fragrance, well it gets her thinking and thinking leads desiring and if there isn’t anybody she’ll handle it. Slow, she loves drawing out her own pleasure, loves to feel that rise but stops before it’s too close. She’ll do that, edge herself a little bit more before biting down on her lip to muffle a more particular louder cry.
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
Both. She lives for giving it and she loves to receive it. She is just, wow, so incredibly good at it, she’s goes about it in such erotic and passionate way and if you’re not looking like you are being possessed by the devil then she up’s her game to make sure that happens. You can squeeze her head with your thighs all you want, she’s built different lol she can handle it. Don’t yank to much on her hair though, claw at her all you want but easy on the do.
She’s had a few inexperienced lovers which she has to guide when they want to go down on her. She’s very particular of what and how she likes it, but she’s patient enough to teach you.
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
I’ll do you one better, https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMRSKhUoh/
⚙️Heisenberg⚙️
B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and on the other)
https://hagelpaimon.tumblr.com/post/661063110466158592/i-wonder-wonder-who-ill-pick-hesi-baby-a
D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) shout out to @imthegreenfairy88 for helping me out with this one.
The first few times he indulged in this he was very adamant in keeping it to himself and to himself only (with time and reassurance he chills out) but the first time he tried doing ‘back door’ stuff on himself he was very surprised about how good it fucking felt and every so often he indulged in it. There’s an occasion where he ends up in bed with some tourist, gun to his head he doesn’t remember their name but he sure fucking remember the blow job and fingering combo that they gave him that had him seeing fucking stars. He tensed up at first was about to say something but they crooked their fingers just right and swallowed his cock at the same time and words were out the window along with thoughts.
He was so far gone that it didn’t cross his mind that when he begged for another finger, he gave himself away and if their eyes weren’t indication of how delighted they had been, feeling two more additional fingers really proved the point.
J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)
I mean I’m saying yea, he has to get creative with it sometimes so as to not get bored, but he picks up a few things he enjoys (he is creative after all) he’s definitely ruined his fair share of pillows, loves rutting into them. He has beat off probably in any section of the factory but shower is better for clean up. He for sure has done it outside of the factory, probably relaxing on a chair and if the weather is nice enough, it’s not like anybody is gonna suddenly drop by. He likes a tight closed fist when he’s close but enjoys a teasing touch to start things off, really enjoys grabbing his balls when he does it. Very messy messy boy when he cums.
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
This man blows you like his life depends on it. VERY sloppy but it’s really hot, it’s how eager he is about it and how willing he is to suffocate and or choke on it. He’s told you to sit on his face multiple times at multiple moments of the day. He loves the taste of you, loves feeling suffocated by your thighs. You know what they about big noses too 🥴🥴
As for receiving he likes to dish out what he takes. So expect some rough mouth fucking, he will make you gag, he will make you all teary eyed cause he enjoys it. He’s fine with it without to be honest, he much prefers to be balls deep in you but if you enjoy doing it then expect hip thrusting.
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
Not super loud, but he isn’t mute. He groans and moans but he’s also a talker so expect a lot dirty talk. His voice drops in a way when he’s fucking you that it makes your toes curl. He’s all breathy pants when he’s close. Lots and lots of cuss words.
👾Donnie💜
B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and on the other)
https://hagelpaimon.tumblr.com/post/661063462078889985/b-body-part-their-favourite-body-part-of-theirs
D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
He likes the taste of his own cum.
He denies it, really denies it, just says it’s his way of cleaning you up after a nice romp but he really has a way of proving the opposite. Donnie has ‘finished’ on you in every way shape or form. On your stomach, back, face etc you name and each time he has cleaned you up he’s either wiped it up and sucked on his fingers or he’s just full blown licked it off of you.
And there is something so disgustingly erotic about that you haven’t or don’t want to call him out on it. You’ve gone down on his multiple times and he very eager to kiss you after your done. One time you purposefully left some on your chin and lips to see if he’d clean it up first but nah, kissed the heck out of you. His favorite is cumin in you and then going down on you. The first time he did that, it was enough to make your toes curl till they cracked and just as you were about to say something he was yanking another orgasm from you. The combined taste of his and yours release? Fuck now that was his favorite.
J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)
Does it and does it often. He’s not prudish about it, it’s free oxytocin and for a guy who’s convinced he’s never gonna get a shot at being with somebody physically, might as well practice some self love.
Loves visual stimulation but he’s really into audio stimuli. Likes those audios where he feels he’s there with the person or the ones where they give instructions. Donnie is really into edging and if he’s got the time and privacy he can literally edge himself for a couple of hours. Has at times managed hands free orgasms. Has made cock sleeves or basically fleshlights (ah ingenuity), can have his moments where he’s super slow and teasing about it, light strokes and all that. Can also have moments where he basically fucks his fist to the point of making some pretty obscene wet noises. If listening to audios or watching videos he really loves trying to cum at the same time as the person in the vid or audio. Has a bottle of lotion right on the desk but that shit is so cluttered with stuff that nobody has picked up on it and honestly it’s kinda funny.
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
GIVE GIVE GIVE.
Oh my lord is he OBSESSED with giving oral. It’s such a big turn on for him. He just loves how intimate it is, he loves how he’s giving you pleasure in such an intimate position. LOVES over stimulating with his mouth, loves feeling thighs trying to break his head, happy to die down the suffocated in his favorite place, loves feeling a hand at the back of his head and pushing him in further.
He’s not crazy about receiving cause he knows his size is a challenge but he’s not opposed to it, he much rather get a hand job from you.
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
Loud and not afraid about it. He enjoys the fuck out of it and is going to be vocal about it unless it’s adamant to be quiet because people are around. His churrs are really nice, deep but not as baritone as say Raph’s, but they feel and sound so good.
#tmnt bayverse#re8 village#donnie#heisenberg#alcina dimitrescu#lady d#lady dimitrescu#tmnt Donatello#Karl Heisenberg#lord heisenberg#tmnt Donnie#Donatello#ns*w alphabet#ask#dianounais
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DIABOLIK LOVERS Haunted Dark Bridal ー Sharon’s Route [PROLOGUE]
Monologue
The most painful thing in this world,
is losing your home. Your place-to-be.
No matter how dire the situation,
if you are surrounded by people who love and care for you.
No obstacle is invincible.
Then ーー Where do I belong?
Having long lost the place I once considered home.
I spent many years in a place which would provide for me.
I had food, a roof above my head, a warm bed to sleep in at night.
But could I truly call this my home?
Those doubts would lurk in the back of my mind, keeping me up at night.
Until one day, I was made a special offer.
If I complied, I would be given the thing my heart longs for the most.
ーー A new home.
Location: Sakamaki Manor ;; Outside
Sharon: This is the place, right...?
( Woah...Amazing. I’ve never seen a house quite this big. They even have a garden! )
*Knock knock*
Sharon: Excuse meー! My name’s Sharon. I’m supposed to move in here today!
...
...
( No response...? How strange. They should have been informed through the Church. )
*Knock knock*
Sharon: Hello...? Anybody home...!?
Sharon: ( What to do...? There doesn’t seem to be anyone home right now. It’s already getting dark. I can’t just stand here all night either. )
*Creaaaaak*
Sharon: ...Huh? Did the...door just open by itself?
( Does that mean I can go inside? I feel a little hesitant just entering someone else’s home butーー I was told I could live here so it should be fine, right? )
She enters the manor.
Location: Sakamaki Manor ;; Entrance Hall
Sharon: Just as I thought, the inside is equally spacious. I can’t imagine just one person living in such a large house all by themselves. Cleaning must take quite some time as well.
She puts down her suitcase.
*Thud*
Sharon: Phew...
( ...It’s so quiet. Almost as if the house is deserted. I wonder if the owner is out at the moment? In that case, I should probably wait in the living room. )
Sharon looks around.
Sharon: I guess it’s...that way?
*Rustle*
Sharon: ...!!
( I...Did I just...step on something? It felt...strangely soft and... )
???: ーー Oi.
Sharon: ...Kyah!
Sharon: ( A person...!? Oh my gosh. I just arrived here and the first thing I do is step on someone! )
???: ...
Sharon: I’m terribly sorry! I didn’t think there would be someone lying on the floor and...!
( ...Speaking of which, what were they doing down there anyway!? ...Sleeping? No way, right? When you have a house this large, you definitely don’t need to use the floor as a bed... )
???: Haah...
Sharon: Oh no! Are you feeling ill, perhaps? In that case, I shall call a doctor right away!
???: ...You’re loud. How am I supposed to enjoy my Rachmaninov when you’re screaming the place down?
Sharon: Rach...mani...? ...E-Either way, if you’re not feeling sick, then what were you doing on the floor?
???: Wasting his time away listening to music rather than making himself useful, per usual, I would assume. Well, I suppose it is best not to have any expectations of this man in the first place, as he will only let you down in the end.
Sharon: ...!?
( A voice...? Out of nowhere...!? )
Sharon: ...Wah!!
( Where did he come from...? )
???: Now, who might you be?
Sharon: Ah...I’m sorry! My name’s Sharon. I’m an orphan at the Catholic orphanage downtown. I was told by our related Church that the resident of this manor has been so kind to take me in. Are you...perhaps the owner?
???: ...I see. It seems you are the next...sacrifice.
Sharon: Excuse me?
???: Nothing. I was simply talking to myself. ...Ahem. My name is Sakamaki Reiji. The second eldest son of this family and one of the residents here. ...The man you had the ‘honor’ of meeting earlier is Shuu. While you may not suspect so given his deplorable behavior, he is - quite unfortunately - my elder brother.
Sharon: Reiji-san...and Shuu-san, was it? It’s a pleasure meeting you both!
Shuu: ...
Reiji: I assume that is your luggage over there? A room has been prepared for you. We will have one of our servants bring everything upstairs.
Sharon: Thank you very much!
( Thank god...So there wasn’t any mistake after all. )
Sharon: Oh! Right! I actually brought a little gift with me! They’re homemade muffins I made this morーー
*CRASH*
Sharon: ーー ning...!?
Startled by the loud noise, she drops the box with muffins.
*Thud*
???: YOU FUCKIN’ BASTARD!! I swear once I get my hands on youーー!
???: Ahaha! I can’t believe you actually fell for that one! Lame-o!
Reiji: ...
Shuu: Haah...
Sharon: ( H-Hold on, hold on, hold on! Eh? Eeeeh!? I’m not dreaming, right!? That person just punched a hole through the wall!? )
Reiji: Ahem. ...Allow me to introduce. The one who destroyed the wall is the youngest son, Sakamaki Subaru. Next to him is Sakamaki Ayato, the eldest of the triplets.
ーー You two, explain this situation at once!
Ayato: ...Che. Reiji. I didn’t do anythin’! Not my fault that Subaru ate those prank chocolates I left out on the kitchen counter.
Subaru: Fuck off! You definitely did that on purpose! ...I can still feel my mouth burnin’...!!
Sharon: ( ...Prank chocolates? I guess he means those filled with mustard and other spicy condiments, right? I didn’t know people actually bought those. )
Ayato: Of course! I was hopin’ to catch Kanato. Can you imagine what kinda face he would make when poppin’ one of those bad boys in his mouth?
???: ...Say, did you hear that, Teddy? ...I hope Ayato sleeps with one eye open tonight. He might just run into...unfortunate accident.
Sharon: ...Eh!?
( Another person just appeared out of thin air!? )
Ayato: Keh. The lunatic’s here.
Reiji: Sakamaki Kanato, the middle triplet.
...Kanato, If you wish to commit a homicide, please do so outside of the walls of this manor. It takes forever to remove blood stains from the carpet.
Kanato: I don’t recall having to take orders from you.
ーー However, you’re lucky as I happen to be in a good mood right now. I believe I heard someone mention muffins?
Sharon: ...Ah, yes! I made these myse...Huh? ...Oh.
Shuu: It’s not blood, but I think the carpet will need some cleaning regardless.
Reiji: Good grief...
Sharon: Oh no...! The box must have slipped from my fingertips when I heard the sudden crash and...
Ayato: Ah-ahー Look what you did, Subaru. It’s always the youngest child causin’ trouble.
Subaru: HAAH!? All of this started ‘cause you left those stupid chocolates out!
Sharon: ...They turned out really good too. What a shame.
Subaru: ...!! ...O-Oi...You...Um...My bad.
Kanato: ...Unforgivable.
Sharon: Eh?
Kanato: ...HOW WILL YOU MAKE THIS UP TO ME!?
Sharon: ( W-Why is he getting upset at me all of a sudden!? It was obviously just an accident!? )
Um...I’m not sure...I could make some new ones later?
???: There, there, Kanato-kun~ Relax! Even if the muffins were wasted, there’s a delicious snack just waiting to be devoured...
*Rustle*
Sharon: ...!
( Someone wrapped their arms around me from behind!? )
???: ...Right here~ ...Nfu~
Sharon: ...Eh!?
( I-Is he talking about me!? )
Reiji: ...And finally, the youngest triplet, Sakamaki Laito.
Ayato: Oi, Laito! No way you’re gettin’ the first taste again! I still haven’t forgotten last time!
Laito: Eeeh~? It’s not my fault you’re so slow, Ayato-kun~ However, if you’re so insistent on taking a bite out of her, I wouldn’t mind sharing, you know? I’m sure it’d make for a refreshing and thrilling experience~
Ayato: Geh! In your dreams, you perv!
Sharon: ( Taste? Bite...? Why are they talking as if I’m their food!? )
Excusーー
Shuu: ...Strawberries.
Sharon: Eh?
Kanato: What are you talking about? I don’t see any strawberries around.
Reiji: Shuu. Explain yourself.
Shuu: Your panties. They had strawberries on them.
Sharon: ...!!
( When did he...!? Ah! When I stepped on him...! )
Ayato: Pfftー!! Strawberries! How old are you, five? That’s hella lame!
Laito: Hm...~ Strawberries are not bad but with such a lovely body, I’m sure you could pull off something a little more erotic~
Subaru: ...
Laito: Oh, my bad~ I forgot baby bro was in the room. I suppose talking about a woman’s underwear is still a little too much for him to handle.
Subaru: S-Shut up...!!
Reiji: ...Enough! No more on this topic! ...Haah. Is it really that much to ask for you lot to behave? Just for one day?
Ayato: ーー Anyway, Reiji. Who’s this chick anyway? Tonight’s dinner?
Sharon: D-Dinner...!? I’m sorry but...Why are you all talking as if I’m food or something!?
Ayato: Shut it! Nobody asked for your opinion, Ichigo Pantsu.
Sharon: I-Ichigo paーー!? I have a name...! ...It’s Sharon.
Ayato: Yeah, yeah. I-chi-go Pa-n-tsu.
Laito: Hm~ This Bitch-chan does smell sweet just like strawberries. Perhaps I should call you ‘Ichigo-chan’ instead~?
Kanato: She really does. I’m sure her blood would taste just as sweet...Oh? What’s that, Teddy? You’d like to have a taste? Fufu...Good idea. I was just feeling a little peckish myself.
Reiji: Haah...I shall be in my study room. ...Ayato, Kanato, Laito. Please treat our new resident with some respect. It would be a shame to lose another one so soon.
Sharon: ...Wait, please! I’m afraid I don’t quite grasp the situation yet!
Reiji: Haah...Good grief. You must not be very smart, are you? Did you truly believe you would be allowed to stay here for free?
Sharon: ...Eh?
Laito: Nfu~ He’s right, Ichigo-chan. Everything in this world comes at a price. In your case...That would be the delicious blood pumping through your veins...
Sharon: M-My blood...?
Ayato: Heh. You seriously haven’t realized?
Kanato: Teddy...Humans are truly so foolish, aren’t they?
Subaru: Che...Stop beatin’ ‘round the bush already and just tell her.
Shuu: We are Vampires. So the only thing a human such as yourself would have to offer, is your blood.
Reiji: In return, you will be allowed to stay here in this manor. Food, clothes and all other daily necessities willl be provided as well.
Sharon: Vam...pires? That must be some sort of joke, right? It was the Church who arranged this place for me! They would neverーー!
Besides...Vampires only exist in fairytales!
Reiji: Good grief. This is why I simply cannot deal with humans. Not only are they incredibly foolish, they are horribly naive and trusting as well.
Subaru: In other words, you were set up. Just deal with it.
Sharon: ...
( No way, right...? This has to be some sort of mistake? Or a bad dream...? )
Shuu: Pwaah...Anyway, you guys do as you please. I’m going to my room to nap.
Subaru: I’m leaving too.
Reiji: Well then, if you’d excuse me now.
The three of them leave.
Sharon: ...
Laito: Oh dear~? Is that despair I see in your eyes? You poor little thing! Don’t worry, Laito-kun wil make sure to comfort you. After all, there is no better cure for betrayal than pleasure.
Ayato: Don’t be so down, Ichigo Pantsu! It’s not that bad of a deal! You get to offer your blood to Yours Truly after all!
Kanato: Fufu...I’m sure we’ll get along just fine. If you’re lucky, you might even make it into my precious collection one day~
Sharon: ...!!
She suddenly pushes them away.
*THUD*
Ayato: ...Woah!?
Laito: ...Aah~ Not bad, Ichigo-chan! I like myself a feisty girl at times!
Kanato: Ugh! ...What are you doing!? I nearly dropped Teddy just now.
Sharon: ...
She runs upstairs.
Location: Sakamaki Manor ;; Hallway
Sharon: Haah, haah, haah...
( Say, God...? )
( Is this my penalty...? )
( Are you punishing me for my crimes of the past...? )
Monologue
I just kept on running and running.
As said question repeated itself inside my head.
That must be it.
Those guys were exactly right.
Humans are foolish. I was foolish.
Foolish to believe I would be given a new home.
After all, people like me.
ーー They don’t deserve a happy ending.
ーー PROLOGUE: END ーー
[ Dark Prologue ] ->
#diabolik lovers#diabolik lovers oc#sharon's route#(( aaaah it's starting !! ))#(( feedback is welcome and encouraged <33 ))#(( this general prologue focuses on her arrival at the S manor and her first meeting with the boys ))#(( dark prologue will touch upon her backstory a little and her first time attending the academy ))#(( then the other dark scenarios will develop her relationship with all 6 brothers through different scenarios ))#(( if there's a specific idea you have for a fun scenario idea ))#(( please let me know!! ))
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Choke Me
Summary: Reiner can’t comprehend why you won’t have sex with him. You help him understand
Pairing: Reiner Braun x Fem!Reader
Warnings & Content: language, dom!Reader, sub!Reiner, oral sex (female receiving), whipping, unprotected sex, tied up Reiner
Word Count: 1.7 k
A/N: You know what, I'm thriving off of sub!Reiner.
It absolutely baffled Reiner how someone like Annie was such good friends with someone like... you. He didn't mean it in a bad way, it was just too strange that the two of you were so close, yet complete opposites of each other. Annie was a tomboy, silent and calculating, you were dressed in pink from head to toe, loud and outgoing and just so adorable. And you completely ransacked his heart. Reiner was utterly in love with you, and you knew it. So, when he mustered up the courage to ask you out, it did not come as a surprise. In fact, you too crushed on him, and every time you were at their place, your eyes drifted to him, always, all the time. The two of you clicked instantly as a couple, and Reiner could only wonder how on Earth were you single until him, going so far as to asking Annie about your love life and with widened eyes, she hastily dismissed him. See, the thing was that you, despite your bubbly and juvenile personality, were a sick, sadistic dominatrix, and boys were terrified of that. While you usually donned clothing in pastels, flowy dresses and chiffon blouses, half of your closet was filled with garters, suspender belts, corsets, some in the deepest shades of red, others black, materials varying from lace to latex. Whenever you had a guy over and pulled out whips, riding crops or ball gags, they would disappear from the face of the Earth, never evercalling you back. Annie knew this about you but never judged. To each their own, she would say, not exactly caring about your kinks. But she wouldn't know how Reiner would react to that, and while intrigued to find out, she didn't want you two to break up either. Deep down she cared about all of her friends, despite the aloof attitude.
Three months into your relationship, you still politely declined Reiner's offers to have sex. He was incredibly sweet, treating you like a princess, and in return you were supportive and caring, but fearing that he, too, might run away after learning about your kinks, you kept finding excuses to deny him. At one point he even asked you if you have some sort of STD, genuinely concerned but promising to still be with you no matter what. You promised you were clean, but that only made him more curious as to why you wouldn't have him. 'You're not attracted to me?' or 'Am I doing something wrong?' were his usual questions and your heart broke in thousands of pieces each time you refused him. He seemed like the kind of man who dominated in bed, and while you were inclined to switch it out sometimes, you always, always had to have it your way the first time you fucked a guy.
Eventually Reiner couldn't take it anymore. He called you, begged you to explain yourself to him and you ceased to try and keep him away from the carnal pleasure you both desired. You invited him over, offering to cook dinner and disclose what you had managed to hide for so long. He popped at your door with a bouquet of daffodils, matching the honey-yellow apron tied around your waist, his eyes were needy and woeful, still believing it's his fault that you two haven't had sex yet. He kissed you on the lips, starving for more, but you pulled back, opting to discuss things first.
"So," you began, legs crossed under the table and anxiously swirling spaghetti with your fork, "I... shit, I don't even know how to say it."
"Y/N, whatever it is, I promise it won't change what I feel for you." Reiner caressed your cheek so gently that you felt sorry for dragging him into this.
"I think it's best if I show you." You got up, took hold of his hand and guided him into your bedroom. The chamber perfectly reflected your personality, with garlands and fairy lights hanging from the ceiling, doodles and drawings taped to the walls and stuffed toys bundled up on your baby blue bedsheets. "You better sit down for this, babe."
"Jesus, how bad can it be?"
With a sigh, you swung open the closet door, revealing the strangest of sex toys, erotic lingerie and high heeled footwear. Reiner erupted into laughter, throwing himself on your bed and holding his abdomen.
"Why exactly are you laughing?" Your voice was serious, dangerous almost, your body lacking a reaction.
"You're telling me you didn't wanna have sex because, what? You're into BDSM?"
"I don't think you get it, Reiner. I'm not just into it, I like dominating men." You frowned, taken aback by his attitude. He perked his ears up and sat up, suddenly attentive, his gaze locking with yours.
"Do you want to dominate me?" The blond asked, unsure of what it would feel like, but inquisitive to try.
"If you'll let me, yes." You bit your lip, fingers smoothing the apron.
"Fuck it, if it makes you happy, I'll let you do whatever you want to me." Reiner declared, palms on his knees. "Do I need a safe word?"
"Not tonight, I'll go easy on you." You beamed, eyes glistening with so much joy and he almost regretted his decision.
Almost.
Tied up, naked and helpless, Reiner could only watch how you strutted into the bedroom, latex corset around your waist, tits out, riding crop in hand.
"Shit, you look so-" crack.
The thin object met with his cheek and he groaned in pain, confusion written all over his face.
"You speak when I allow it, understood?" And he nodded desperately. "Good boy. Maybe if you behave, I'll reward you."
It was then when Reiner realised how easily his dick hardened when he submitted. It was then when he realised how much he loved you.
You dragged the crop across his body, goosebumps all over his skin, before you propped one foot on the bed, spreading your legs and exposing your wet cunt to him. You could've sworn you saw his pupils dilating when your fingers barely touched the slick slit.
"You want this, Reiner?"
"Yes!" The man almost cried out, licking his lips. Crack. Another hit, this time over his thigh and he whimpered — the sound was music to your ears.
"Yes what?"
"Yes, please!"
"That's better." You hummed, slightly spreading your folds, foot still on the bed. Your middle finger rubbed around your clit, a quiet moan escaping your lips. "Tell me how much you want it!"
Pulling at his restraints, Reiner sighed. Never has he felt so overpowered, but the pleasure he took from it was slowly seeping in his brain, clouding his judgment.
"I need you, Y/N. I need to feel you so bad, please!"
"You gotta earn it first." Voice aggressive yet seductive, you climbed on top of him, feet at the sides of his head. "Lick it good and I'll reward you. Do a bad job and I'll punish you." And before he could utter a word you were straddling his face. His tongue sloppily licked everything it could, in or around your cunt, and you forcefully grabbed the metallic bedframe with one hand, your other one fondling your soft tits. Your moans echoed in the room as you moved your hips for more friction, your breath hitching, his cock twitching. "Atta boy!" You groaned and slid off of him.
"Did I do well?" Reiner asked, hope glistening in his eyes.
"Very well." You snickered and pressed your lips onto his to taste yourself in a sinful kiss.
"Can I get my reward?" The man asked after you pulled away, a mixture of saliva and slickness at the corners of your mouth.
"Oh, I don't know..." You scrunched your nose.
"Please, Y/N! I've been good, I- I need you around my dick, please!" He begged, not even caring how desperate he sounded and that only made you feel like a goddess. You picked up the riding crop and dragged it up and down his shaft, terror in his eyes.
"I wonder how much it would hurt." You mused, head tilted and mischief in your voice.
"No, no, you said it was good! Please don't punish me-"
"Oh, don't be stupid." You rolled your eyes, climbing back on top of him. "I need that dick as much as you do." And with that, your hand helped push his cock in between your folds, painstakingly slowly taking it all in. "Fuck, you're big."
The sound of skin against skin tickled your brain, your hips moving up and down, your cunt clenching around his throbbing member.
"Please..." Reiner groaned.
"Please what?" You threw your head back, the pressure forming in your core making you moan louder.
"Please choke me!" He asked and you almost stopped moving, taken aback by his request.
"I'm beginning to think you like being dominated, love." You grinned, your fingers lightly squeezing his neck.
"God, you're so tight!" The man bucked his hips, the unexpected thrust earning a whimper out of you. "Harder, choke me harder!"
"Fuck, Reiner!" The grip around his neck tightened and your moves became frantic, animalistic. "You like that? You like the way I fuck you?"
"Mhm!" He eagerly nodded, unable to speak.
"Look at you, so small and pathetic." You panted, feeling your climax close and his cock pulsating. "Oh, are you gonna come? Go on, do it, come for me!" You cried out, legs violently quaking as the sticky hot liquid dripped out of your folds, down his shaft. For a moment neither of you moved. You looked at Reiner through strands of Y/H/C that draped over your face, beads of sweat glistening on your forehead. Your hands extended and you untied the ropes around his wrists, falling next to your boyfriend on the mattress, cum leaking out of your cunt.
"Do you still... love me?" You whispered, your voice shy, completely different to the woman you were five seconds ago.
"Babe, of course! And to be fair, it was so hot submitting to you." Reiner pulled you to his chest, fingers brushing your cheek. "Say, think we can switch it up next time?"
"Nope!" You smiled and rested your forehead on his shoulder.
"Eh, at least I tried." The man shrugged. "In all seriousness, though, don't hide things like these from me. If this is what you like then I respect that, Y/N."
Your heart fluttered in your chest. Most boys ran, but Reiner was a man, and he was clearly going to stay.
"Maaaaybe we can switch next time. But only if you behave!"
"Yes, ma'am!"
#reiner braun#reiner x reader#reiner braun x reader#aot#aot x reader#aot smut#snk x reader#snk smut#snk#attack on titan#shingeki no kyoujin
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🄱🄰🄽🄳🄰🄶🄴🅂
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🄱🅄🄲🄺🅈 🄱🄰🅁🄽🄴🅂 🅇 🄳🄾🄲🅃🄾🅁!🅁🄴🄰🄳🄴🅁
🅁🄴🅀🅄🄴🅂🅃🄴🄳: obsessedwithmarvelman
hey there. i am new here so i don't know much. could you please do something fluffy where the reader is a doctor and bucky comes to her house after fighting with some dudes. All he wants is sex but she takes care of his wounds. and it ends with a smut. by the way i love your work. 💞
🅆🄰🅁🄽🄸🄽🄶🅂: smut 18+, angst-ish, fluffy, fwb to lovers, cw; bl00d, gashes, and ouchies lol
🄰🅄🅃🄷🄾🅁’🅂 🄽🄾🅃🄴🅂: dude, this such a good concept i literally could not wait to write this omggggg please enjoy babes ps i know nothing medical but i did take a year long course in high school retaining to sports medicine so i think i did ok? Idk lmao
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You were in the middle of watching whatever sitcom was being aired, at this point there’s too many to keep track, when loud and hard knocks boomed through the quiet apartment. You set your snack down and walked to the door wondering who could possibly be a guest in the dead night.
“Buck?” you answered the door to see the gorgeous man clutching his side.
“Did you get my text?” he asked quickly.
“No, I’m sorry I- uh I didn’t-”
“Doesn’t matter,” he barged through your door.
“Is everything alrig-” Bucky interrupted you mid sentence grabbing your throat and pulling you into a deep and messy kiss.
“God, I need you so fucking bad,” he mumbled against your lips; of you which you gladly leaned into to give him what he needed.
You slipped your hands around his waist when he suddenly flinched and breathed in harshly through his gritted teeth. You took his hand away from your throat and assessed his state clearly understanding he was in no shape to have sex; at least not now.
“What happened?” you asked worriedly.
“Nothing, I just need you,” he tried to lean in again but you dodged his kiss moving under his arm to grab a first aid.
“Y/n, I don’t need whatever it is you're getting. Super soldier, remember?” he chuckled breathlessly
“Oh, I remember, Sargent. Which is why…” you emerged from the bathroom with first aid and a bottle of alcohol and peroxide in hand, “the sooner we patch you up, the faster you’ll heal.”
“Ok, doctor,” he said sarcastically.
“Excuse me, don’t mock my title,” you grinned.
“Not only can I assist you in need sexual frustration or as you call it, your personal fuck buddy, but I help you out when you come me to looking like the goddamn crypt keeper covered in blood,” you smiled sarcasically, which made Bucky chuckle.
“Now take your shirt off, let me assess the damage.”
When he did there was a huge gash spilling blood on the side of his ribs. Bruise and cuts litter his stomach and chest, even his arms. You gasped and your heart ached for him and even though he wasn’t in immense pain because of the serum, the fact that this is what it took for him to be in any pain scared you.
“Did you really think you could get away with fucking me in this condition?” you asked; you were upset.
“I didn’t want to worry you. Besides it doesn’t hurt anymore and I’m gonna stop bleeding,” he brushed off.
“Fuck you, Bucky. Didn’t want to worry me my ass. And if you stained every surface in my apartment?”
“I’ll buy you a new apartment,” he smiled, his beautiful stunning smile, shit.
“Fuck off,” you said making him chuckle.
You swiped the blood away gently with a towel soaked in peroxide. You applied a bit of triple antibiotic ointment on his smaller cuts even though it was unlikely they’d become infected but you took precaution nonetheless.
Bucky watched you with soft eyes. He thought about when you said the he called you his ‘personal fuck buddy’. It didn’t sit right with him anymore. His face held a somber look and you looked up at him concerned.
“Are you ok?” you said softly.
“Yeah,” he whispered.
You took an emergency stitching kit and although everything comes pre sterilized you poured the alcohol over the curved needle and threaded it through the bruised skin. Bucky tensed under your cold hands and flinched at the first stitch. Your head instantly shot up to make sure he was alright.
“I’m ok, angel,” he reassured.
You continued to stitch his wound expertly and yet again he flinched ever so slightly but you caught immediately apologizing.
“Doll, it’s ok. It’s like a little pinch, relax.”
“I’m sorry; I don’t usually have to do this to people I care about,” you said smoothly as if it was something you always said; you care about him.
“Well, don’t worry too much about me, darling,” he smirked.
“Hey, I have every right to worry about the man I fool around with,” you said playfully.
“That’s one way of putting it,” Bucky laughed. You finished stitching his wound and cleaning any areas to prevent infections and grabbed a cloth bandage to place over it in case it bleeds again.
“There. Do you need anything else? Water? Food; are you hungry?” you stood up.
“Not for food,” he said lowly, making your stomach flip.
“You’re still horny?” you played off the butterflies.
“Only for you darling, you’re addictive,” he moved his hands under your large shirt easily.
“No, you're insatiable,” you threw back.
“Yet you feed my desperate appetite.”
“Shall I stop then?”
“If you had the willpower, you would’ve by now. Maybe you’re just as addicted as I am,” he leaned in.
“Maybe I am,” you whispered.
“Well? Are you gonna stop me?” he teased.
“Of course not.”
Bucky crashed his lips against yours hungrily and you melted against his body perfectly. His hands squeezed your sides gently making you smile and Bucky picked you up and carried you to the bedroom; a place he knew like the back of his hand, so many nights spent with you that he cherished more than he’d like to admit.
When he got to the bedroom you released your feet down to the floor and Bucky helped you land gracefully. You grabbed his hand and led to sit comfortably on your bed. You kissed him passionately and soon after slowly kneeled to the ground in front of him. Bucky’s lust-blown eyes hungrily drank you in as you sank to the floor.
“You don't have to-”
“Uh-uh, you need to relax and let me take care of you, baby,” you rubbed his thighs slowly making Bucky squirm under you.
You pulled his pants down his legs and pressed light kisses to his thighs before grabbing his hard cock in your hand. You pumped up and down in your hand and Bucky’s head fell back and he sighed pleasurably
You licked the underside of his cock and Bucky moaned; he was already turning into putty in your hands and you barely touched him. You circled your tongue around the swollen tip before placing the head inside your mouth. You tried your best to breathe steadily through your nose as you sucked hard, hollowing your cheeks around his dick.
“Fuck, Y/n,” Bucky threaded his hand thorugh your hair and pulled you further down on his length.
Your hand pumped for what you couldn’t take in your mouth and you moaned around his cock. The vibrations from your throat made Bucky climax and spurts of hot ribbons of cum shot down your throat. You pulled away from him and Bucky’s legs trembled subtly. Cum dripped down the side of your chin and you swiped it into your mouth and sucked on your fingers seductively staring into his eyes making Bucky groan lowly.
“You’re so fucking hot, baby,” he pulled close and kissed you sildly he could taste himself on your tongue and he instantly became hard again.
You practically tore your shirt and pants off, pouncing on Bucky playfully. He laughed before kissing you again and flipping you delicately onto your back. He kissed your neck and collarbones gingerly, his hands roaming around your naked body.
His thigh pressed between yours and he could feel the wetness from your core spreading across his skin. Your fingertips grazed his sides as you sighed from his soft lips against your burning skin. Bucky’s hands fell between your bodies and pumped his cock a couple times before lining up with your slick entrance.
His tip flicked your sensitive clit ever so subtly and just that alone made your entire body jerk. You could feel the puffs of air escape Bucky in the crook of your neck as he chuckled.
“Bucky, please,” you whimpered.
“Please what, baby? What do you want; tell me,” he whispered against your ear.
“Fuck me, please. Bucky, I need you,” your nails clawed at his skin on his back and Bucky hissed immediately pushing into you passed your folds.
His thrusts weren’t exactly soft but they weren’t quick. It was the perfect tempo, rutting into you roughly and slowly. His hips snapping against yours harshly surely to leave bruises to commemorate his time spent with you.
You moans were loud against Bucky’s ear but he loved every second of it. He loved hearing you fall apart under him; so much he perked his head up and watched your beautiful features contort in pleasure caused by him and only him. Your body moving against his like a ragdoll as he had his way with you just like you always let him.
Your legs wrapped around Bucky’s torso pulling closer to you. He started hitting a new angle of which made your eyes roll back and your back arched. His grunts mixed with your high pitched moans and echoed throughout the entire apartment.
Bucky cupped your face softly with his metal hand and traced your lips as he continued to thrust into you. His thumb passed your lips into your mouth and your eyes flashed a sparkle of mischievous as you began to suck on his thumb. Your tongue circled his thumb as you had done to his dick not so long ago and Bucky groaned at the erotic sight.
You released his metal thumb with an exasperated pop and Bucky crashed his lips down to you. The bed under you two shook and hit the wall; surely to annoy the hell out of any neighbors home in the late hours, which was more than likely.
“Fuck, Bucky! I’m gonna cum!” you whimpered.
“Cum baby. I’m right behind you, doll,” he pressed his forehead against yours looking into your eyes intimately.
Your entire body shook against his. You saw stars in your eyes, your toes curled, your back arched; you felt euphoric. When you came down from your high you opened your eyes and found those special blue eyes, the ones you simultaneously sought comfort and desire in.
Bucky looked down on you with a small smile before leaning down again to kiss you faintly before cleaning the both you up generously. He went to gather his clothes and for a moment you reminded yourself that he wasn’t yours, he didn’t live here, he had to go now; just like always.
“Bucky, will you be alright?” you asked gingerly.
“Um,” he looked down at his gash that no longer held those badnages you carefully placed and simply revealed his already scarring flesh that you expertly stitched up; you were a doctor after all.
“I should probably stay, you know in case I need your help,” he said shyly; it was suggestive because you and him both knew that he wasn’t going to need help, he was going to be in perfect condition again by morning but neither of you could say goodbye to each other.
“Yeah, I was thinking the same thing,” you said timidly.
Bucky smiled softly and crawled back into bed with you. He pulled your warm naked body against his and you practically melted into his side. You fit like a perfect puzzle piece. His hand caressed your side bringing goosebumps to skin and you chuckled when Bucky realized what he did.
“Stop, that tickles,” you said muffled as your head was buried shyly into the crook of Bucky’s neck.
“What?” he feigned innocence.
“Fuck off,” you both laughed breathlessly.
There was a moment of silence that rested between you two. What you had was quite domestic but you weren’t in a relationship. Without the other knowing, you both thought about what life could be like for the two of you if you did say the words.
“Y/n,” he whispered.
“Hm?”
“Can I tell you something?” he whispered, you instantly knew what he was going to say; you felt it.
“I love you, too,” you whispered.
“Really?” he asked, surprised.
“Yeah,” you cupped his face, “I do.”
Bucky kissed you and gently rubbed his nose against yours before asking, “Can you say it again?”
“I love you.”
“Again.”
“I love you so much,” you curled your fingers in his tangled hair.
“Oh god, please, again,” he practically moaned.
“I love you. I love you. I love you, Bucky.”
You leaned back to look at him and noticed tears brimming his eyes; you gently wiped them away kissing his cheeks. This feeling was entirely new to him. He felt overwhelmed a bit but he loved you so much it was all he could think about right now. He didn’t exactly know when he really fell in love but it didn’t matter because here you were in his arms, actually his, and he wasn’t gonna let you go. Not a million years.
“I love you.”
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@mathletemadison
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes x reader#marvel smut#marvel fics#james bucky barnes#james buchanan barnes#james buchanan barnes smut
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Top Forty Thor-Being-Thor Moments from Thor 1
just absolute dumb*ssery that this 7yr old kid’s life goal is to “hunt down the monsters and slay them all”. I’ll go easy on him here and let the Thor/Loki expressions do the talking because of “...just like you did Father” but seriously can his hands even fit around a sword handle??? this kid isn’t even punching the air right??? if there was a sword in his hand he would’ve cut his head with the way he’s moving???? pure tiny-himbo energy here just look at that >:o face he’s making. contrasts very nicely with Loki’s ‘,:|. 10/10. such a baby idiot.
“the jotuns must pay for what they have done! they broke into the weapons vault! if the frost giants had stolen even one of these relics!” thor. thor please. can you even name one of these relics. thor. hey thor. thor. shut up. “well, what would you do about this?” odin asks him. “march into jotunheim! like you once did! break their spirits! so they’ll never try anything like this again!” wow okay so we’ve fast-forwarded by like a thousand years and thor is still going on about genocide. huh. that’s funny, i thought loki was the genocidal one. hmm. i also just realized that the loki exclusive clip gives loki the same hairstyle thor has here so do what you will with that information.
0/10. horrible. terrible. i dont care how angy thor is about not getting to kill some jotuns or become king today this very instant, that is a tremendous waste of food. an absolute fool. how can he just remorselessly throw the bread to the floor. if loki stabbed him when he was 7 he would deserve it for this table flip alone. what a privileged white *ssh*le.
loki came skulking around a corner and suggested not to go to jotunheim and not only did thor not suspect anything but he also then went on to decide to go to jotunheim. 10/10 himbo material.
if tumblr didn’t have a picture limit i would put every instance of thor smiling in this list because look at that stupid smile. he’s such an idiot. 11/10. this is the thor content i’m here for.
“I have no plans to die today” thor says with the stupidest open-mouthed smirking smile ever captured on film. right after he also told heimdall not to tell anyone they’re gone. he’s literally planned to strand them on jotunheim. thor’s grand plan was to strange themselves on jotunheim and also start a fight. i repeat: thor’s plan was to successfully slay all the frost giants and not need to return until they’re all gone. what an absolute d*mb*ss. this is getting ridiculous. this was originally a top-ten-thor moments list but i’m not even twenty minutes in so i’ll have to extend the list. thor. thor are you listening? thor, you’re such an idiot.
“HOW DID YOUR PEOPLE GET INTO ASGARD?!” thor you sweet sweet summer idiot, please, i am beggin,g you,, learn to rea,d , a room,, literally everyone else who came with you is regretting it, there is complete silence and only the rumble of the opposing king is meeting your “I AM THOR, SON OF ODIN”s, please, please take some notes from Loki, or, you know, literally anyone else in the room, since everyone is asking you to get out of this realm while you still can,
thor’s stupid smile makes an appearance after he gets called a princess and decides to fight a whole realm over it. you know what? thor is a princess. he’s the prettiest princess in all the lands. what’s thor gonna do about it? is he going to fight me too? I hope he does the stupid grin first. minus 15 points for the sexism. thor is a complete and utter sadistic fool who needs to get a hobby. seriously, he’s 1500 years old and still going on and on about slaying all the frost giants. boi, i hate to break it to you, but your dad is not the best or only example of greatness out there. i don’t think your dad even qualifies as an example of that.
“THEN. GO!” 🥰 ahh yes, just thor thingz 🥰🥰 like when one friend has had his arm burnt 🥰 and another friend has been impaled and needs medical attention, 🥰🥰 and all the rest of your friends are yelling for you, 🥰 and your brother is telling you they must go, 🥰 and you decide to buy everyone time by laughing maniacally and killing more frosties because you care for them and dont find joy in destruction like a loon 🥰🥰🥰
THIS is the iconic Thor moment that makes my day whenever I think about it. Just Thor, an absolute bumbering 6′6′’ giant boodlusting dummy sees Odin and just decides to yell “FATHAA!! WE’LL FINISH THEM TOGETHAAA!” as if the last thing Odin told him wasn’t “no, thor, we’re not going to do anything to the frost giants, do not go after them and try to kill them all.” 11/10 d*mb*assery right here folks, I couldn’t ask for Thor to be more of a fool. This is PEAK Thor energy. Look at that face. I feel like Thor spends half this movie with his nostrils flared. I love it.
okay i gotta give thor credit for rightfully calling odin “an old man and a fool” but also there was not even 1 frame of the scene where Thor had a decent face so now all i see is >:O >:| >:o >:[ when i watch that scene. yelling at odin was great, not yelling at odin after he HUAERGHed at loki was less great, but to be fair it’s thor and he is the definition of Peak D*mb*ss.
thor literally GROWLS and starts yelling “HAMMAA?? HAMMER??” over and over. He was hit by a van, he fainted, he woke up and started growling. I don’t know what else there is to say about this.
“you dare threaten me? puny human?”. so. uhh. basically. Thor knew she was threatening him? He KNEW she had a weapon? instead he made a face and started yelling as he tried to walk his way closer????? thor you complete and utter dum dum. you frickin hairball-for-brains. im not even surprised darcy tasered him. with that kind of face, i’d taser him too.
when you wake up in an unknown place to a person smiling at you without a stupid smile, the first step is always to attack first and ask questions later 😌😌😌 (but seriously thor you imbecile why didn’t you ask where you were instead of throwing multiple people around the room and getting your butt needled. you clueless buffoon. you’ll remain a clueless buffoon if you don’t listen to anyone.)
just a quick recap but thor was knocked unconscious by a van and these people kidnapped him aboard and the next scene we see him in he’s checking himself out in mirror after presumably changing right there in the open?????? these are the things that make thor thor. any other character and i’d question it so much, but this is thor, and i truly believe this is in-character for him. just change in the open because why not? thor is a beefcake and that’s his only redeeming quality and he knows it. 10/10 thor moment.
I am now convinced that Thor saw Jane and “5k van-hitter to lover slow-burn height-difference himbo-scientist trope” flashed through his mind.
“but no more smashing!” Jane says, and then Thor proceeds to check her out and smile unlike an idiot and like a douche. was this his version of flirting???? i’m not one to decide, but yes, yes it was. He threw a cup to the ground and broke it, and she’s getting mad at him and berating him about it, and he’s liking it. y’all i’m sorry to break it to you like this, but thor has a canon fetish. i am so, so sorry.
im DYING. THAT ISN’T EVEN A KISS, HIS MOUTH IS OPEN. he SMUSHES his mouth around her knuckle???? WHY. I can’t keep noticing things like this. send help. please. Jane’s response makes so much more sense now; she’s laughs for a solid 3 seconds and shakes her head and is like “uhh, thank you? ahaha,” and then she keeps looking back longingly when walking away. they are doing this in PLAIN sight of EVERYONE. Darcy and Erik are standing RIGHT THERE, and Thor is doing weird things to her with his mouth. I’m out. I am done here. goodbye.
return of the stupid smile AND the douche smile in quick succession through the entire trip. their entire dialogue is peppered with innuendo. “I’ve never done anything like this before. have you ever done anything like this before?” “many times, but you are brave to do it.” “I have nothing else to lose.” “ah but you are clever, far more clever than anyone else on this realm.” “realm? rEaLm?” “you think me strange?” “yes” “good strange or bad strange?” “I haven’t decided yet.” I AM DYING OVER THIS. plus, we get Return Of The Himbo with Jane asking after Einstein Rosen bridges and Thor is like “uh, actually, more like a rainbow bridge 😜🤪” i feel so sorry for jane here, didn’t know how much of a d*mb*ss Thor was when signing up for this van-trip and knuckle-sucking 😭😭😭 i also no longer have questions about how the trip that SHOULD HAVE BEEN A HALF-HOUR ONE turned into one that LASTED TILL THE SUN WENT FROM THE MIDDLE OF THE SKY TO SETTING by the time they arrived. I have no questions. please. I don’t want to know what they were doing in that van. please no. don’t make me think about it.
thor’s plan had 3 steps and they were 1. give jane his jacket 2. walk in and get his hammer 3. fly out. that was literally his plan. he had the first “I have a plan. attack.” moment in the MCU. pure concentrated 0-brain-cells energy right here. how can you not stan this king of d*mb*ssery. look at him, flaunting his big boy muscles. he’s about get his hammer and fly out, like he just told jane with a trademark stupid-smile.
crop-top hair-mop thor is my favourite thor. the way the entire fight scene parallels a hamster in a maze only exemplifies the thor vibes for some inexplicable reason.
“you’re big. fought bigger.” + Thor douche-smile + subtext from earlier + rolling around passionately in the mud = not a happy me.
I swear i’m not making up this romantic subtext but it’s barely even subtext. the entire scene leading up to Thor’s attempt at lifting the hammer is actually filmed erotically. I’m not kidding. First there’s a shot where Thor pulls aside a hamster-cage-wall blind which mirrors a shower-curtain, and THEN he walks around the hammer while smiling douche-ly at it, we get a few close-ups to his face which are shot from angles slightly lower than himself, giving him an aire of superiority, plus the music adds to this, he reaches out for the hammer’s handle with a mud-covered arm in the rain, in non-slow-motion slow-motion, and he wraps his arm around it, like, he fully twists his arm, unecessarily sexually, around it as he grabs the hammer. This is not okay. On the plus side, it makes the movie much more entertaining,, on the down side,,.
im not going to call Thor dumb for not knowing he’s not worthy. im not going to. because odin literally whispered the enchantment to mjolnir after he’d thrown thor to midgard. it is very funny watching thor grunt in frustration though. he starts yelling because he couldn’t lift the hammer and just lets himself get caught. like, dude, get a life, go buy a new weapon from the store, seriously. he mourns for the hammer on-screen longer than he does for loki. he also looks like he’s in far more pain here. he becomes catatonic and unresponsive after this, but when loki dies he’s already feasting the same afternoon. 10/10 dum dum thor material. never change thor, never change. (that’s code for please change, thor, please,)
thor trying to establish dominance wherever he goes is the funniest thing because at this point he’s being a complete asgardian *ss about it and it’s reaching points of pettiness never seen before. side note: he is possibly flirting with selvig too. maybe. i’m not saying anything happened, but Thor’s openning lines when bringing him home carried over his shoulder are “he’s fine, not injured at all,” followed with an apology to selvig, and an explanation to jane which consisted only of “we drank, we fought, he made his ancestors proud,” and then he puts the man to bed and before he falls asleep erik says “i still don’t believe you’re the g*d of th*nder, but you ought to be,” so... your choice, i guess...
thor’s got his trademark stupid smile and stupidly takes jane’s life’s work notebook and starts doodling in it about trees. the last time his father told him this story about Yggdrasil was when he was 5 and he clearly hasn’t payed attention to any lesson about anything since and it shows so so much. thank you thor. very insightful knowledge you’re passing on hear. ‘i come from a world where [science and magic] are one and the same,’ ok great, now elaborate on that please. oh, right, you can’t because you’re thor, my bad, 20/10 thor behaviour. he couldn’t even doodle nicely. all his lines are wobbly. epic art fail. i wouldn’t trust him near my sketchbook with a 2B pencil.
THIS is thor’s realization face. in case anyone was interested in what ‘dawning truth’ looked like on him. 😰😪 THIS is the face of a thinker, of a man betrayed by his own beloved brother for unprecedented reasons. look at the nuance in his expression. 😩😩😩 so many emotions, I can’t even count them all 😩💯😪
stupid smile and “do not worry my friends, i have a plan,” he says, “i’ll just try and abuse the fact that Loki’s super selfless and kind and has no self worth to my benefit as i have countless times before which is exactly what he’s rightfully angry about this time,” he doesn’t think to himself because that is NOT the smile of someone who is thinking... like, at all. +10000 points to gryffinthor. the d*mb*ssery really jumps out.
“im sorry bro for whatever i did and whatever you’re blaming me for as an excuse to do this, im sorry bro, but you’re disturbing innocents that i don’t really care about but you’re the one making a scene in front of them so why don’t you admit you won’t kill me and are just having a temper tantrum and we move on? hmm?” and then he proceeds to get slam dunked in the face with a metal arm like yEAAAA BOI that’s what you GET for going up against the SENTIENT LAVA-SPEWING metal-man ya absolute dunderhead clod. thunderhead clod? yeah, that. he’s just so dumb, your honour, please, you must understand, the victim pleads guilty on all charges of d*mb*ss and d*mb*ss alone.
I can NOT describe the emotions I feel knowing that Thor is suck-kissing Jane’s knuckles. Like, his mouth is literally jelly-ing it up against her hand. There is suction there and it shows when he is placing and removing his mouth. I promise that’s what is happening. I’m not any happier than you about this. I regret everything. This is why Loki should be what is focused on and not Thor; Thor’s going around trying to frick frack everything in sight even if it’s just Jane’s hand. He’s maintaining eye contact with Jane while he licks her fingers. Why did I decide to rewatch this movie.
i’m only adding this in as a thor moment because of how desperately and badly they kiss. seriously. 2/10 kiss. im not surprised jane broke up with him. they look like two actual seals fighting over an actual grape. while i’m here i’m going to criticize every fic ever that decided thor is an experienced gentle lover. what were y’all on when watching this movie. thor can and will f*ck literally everything in sight and he won’t even do it well because he is the peakest of peak d*m d*m. look at this man. look at his face. that is the face of an absolute himbo idiot, and it’s the face of an absolute himbo idiot who knows it. he’s been stranded on earth for 2 days, max, and his flirt-count is at 69 people because his name is one letter away from thot. i bet his terrible use of a pen from early means he writes his ‘r’s like ‘t’s and he doesn’t even care. 1000/10 thor moment. doesn’t get much more romance-thor than two individuals smooshing their faces together after some finger sucking. that finger sucking is gonna leave jane simping for years. and that’s true love babey. <3
“I’ll handle my Brother!” Thor says, as if Loki didn’t send a metal-murder-bot that quite virtually killed him less than ten minutes ago asdfhkhsdgsdjf Thor, you horrific himbo you, Loki’s weapon of choice is literally throwing knives he will literally kill you before you enter the room if he’s on his game and wants you dead which he just proved he would do and you’re just gonna???????????? jog on over to him????? Thor??????????? bruH???????????? buddy??????? pal???????? you really wanna go 1v1 the brother you very clearly underestimate and know nothing about????????????????? im loving the confidence, but, no.
Loki: “you literally can’t stop this from here.” Thor, immediately: “i’m going to hit it with the hammer and see if that works” and then it does in fact work later... technically speaking, even if it ends up causing chaos destruction and death and loki falling off the bifrost 😔😔😔 but Big Brain Thor is the Biggest Brained Thor!!! The plan worked!! in a messy-Thor-ish way, but it did!!!
“you can’t kill an entire race!!!!” Thor yells, teeth gritted, as he faces his brother, his coward pacifist brother, who has suddenly decided he wants to join the age-old family tradition of realm-destroying, when this is supposed to be Thor’s dream, Thor’s, not Loki’s. How dare he, Thor thinks to himself, fist clenched around Mjolnir in anger, the pain of the handle pressing against his palm perhaps the only thing preventing him from lashing out at this thought, that’s my planet of monsters to slay, he should go get his own! Loki hits Thor across the face with the back-end of his spear. “Now fight me,” Loki says, but Thor, well, Thor cannot fight, as he remains stunned that of all things Loki would dare steal his life’s ambition, and he is sent sprawling backwards across the observatory, slowly but surely sliding to a stop despite his catatonic, very symbolic silence.
the elegance, the poise, i see your time on earth has made you no less graceful, Thor. the simple magnitude of this sprawl. the spread of the arms. the turn of the feet. this is not a dude, this is a man.
sometimes your brother starts vehemently talking about he’s gonna kill the race of monsters and about how he’s only ever wanted to be your equal and about how he’s not your brother and never was and sometimes you just have to say “this is madness” instead of addressing the issues or asking for any of the deets 🔥 👊💯😩
Loki is whipping Thor’s butt. Both literally, and metaphorically, Loki is whooping Thor’s d*mb*ss. Earlier he knicked Thor’s face, now he’s just pushing Thor around, he uses the spear as a pole and later kicks Thor’s face by kicking vertically up, and Thor, bless him in all his blond golden muscled glory, doesn’t think anything is up with this, gosh he’s such an absolute utter idiot
sometimes your brother laughs way too much and also cries too much in a fight and there are also too many of him so you just need to blast lightning so you get a shot at all of them 😌😌😌 and then put your magical infinitely-heavy hammer on his chest 😌😌😌 but it’s okay because Thor left holes in Loki’s container 😌😌😌
now THIS is the meat to Thor’s funny bone, just the pure unadulterated humour that is Thor saying that there will never be a “wiser king” or a “better father” than Odin, it cracks me up every single time without fail, just the way he says it with a straight face and— what do you mean he wasn’t joking
look at Thor’s stupid smile as he asks Heimdall to spy on jane every single day while conveniently never asking after Loki ever. This is Thor’s face in mourning after he attended a feast after everyone was celebrating after Loki’s death. Look at his stupid smile. I love him your honour. He’s just,, he’s just so frickin stewpeed, just Thor being Thor, just the purest of d*mbest of *sses.
#listen#if people can interpret loki and the grandmaster as a thing when loki spends the entire time looking uncomfortable about every situation#then i can interpret thor as flirting with people when there are actual canon questions which get solved when other explanations dont work#so#dont mind me here#in conclusion: thor is a dum dum idiot and it's *chef's kiss*#thank you for coming to my ted talk#ThisPostIsLongerThanMyLifeSpan#TPILTMLS#Language!#language#im one of those people who comments on things through movies but you can't be mad because it's worth it and i've got points#obviously writing means i can get the full gist of the comments out without summarizing#but#like#my family is simply underappreciative and i'm a genius
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