#vampires love denny's | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bitch-butter · 2 years

Note

Hey, I hope you're doing well, if you're taking requests from that list, could I ask for 131 and webgott? Be well!

thank you for sending this in! this prompt had A Lot going on in my head that for obvious reasons took me to a place of vamp, so I hope you don't mind this takes place in ye olde down comes the night (aka vampires) universe.

there are some...Details in here that pertain to something I'm working on rn, bc it's been very much on the dome, but hopefully I don't give too much away! I hope you find something to like in this, be well ~

“I’ll spend a thousand lifetimes coming back to you.”

For some reason he thought that the moment he was turned his life would somehow cease to be what it was.

Not anything spectacular, nothing like opening his eyes and finding the sky going different colors, being able to spot dust mites floating in the air, hearing emotions type of different. Just, different. Even if only intangibly he assumed that becoming a vampire was going to be nonstop something, whether it be euphoria, anxiety, hunger, anything.

And yet Joe still sat staring at a fucking laptop and refreshing the page over and over again like it was going to show his Vampire Eyes, as Lestat would say, something different.

He had the urge to rub over his eyelids, ease away fatigue, but he didn’t actually feel it. Joe hadn’t been tired since last December, and it’s late November now. Outside he recognized it was cold, but he couldn't feel the discomfort of the chill, finding his predominant reactions are ones of pure sympathy, even managing to fake a convincing yawn back to a woman in CVS last week.

Really the main thing he feels these days is boredom. Or, it was before September.

He sighed, and caught himself again. Breathing. What even is that anymore?

In the heavy, early days of his change, when the venom was still fresh under the thin covering of his skin and the burn shot over every inch of his body, he would try to gasp in pain and would choke on air that didn’t come to him, unable to let himself believe he didn’t need it. Back then he could barely speak, barely move, could only think of hunger, hunger, hunger, and David.

Always. Always.

It had been like nothing he’d ever felt before, the relief that surged through his dying veins as he put his mouth to David’s neck and was permitted, lovingly, to feed. That first rush of intoxication, burning like whiskey straight down his throat, tasting fresh, earthy, was enough that he half expected to never regain his senses, to forever be an animal David kept under the porch and would throw scraps of affection at.

But he had recovered. Straightened, stepped forward on two legs into this new thing that together they could call a life, but in many ways was not living at all. With David he had started to learn the ways to walk on earth as something other than himself, began to look for opportunity, for pockets of darkness for them to easily slip in and out of, and so far it had made him strong. The cravings weren’t nearly as bad as David had told him he’d endured, given tastes of his maker’s still, sweet blood and swallowing it down like a child's medicine to keep the itching along the back of his throat away, stop the terrible flares of anger that came when he couldn’t seem to get enough.

David was patient with him. Joe would have been convinced he’d done this before with the gentleness and skill he had in managing Joe’s sudden shifts, his hunger, his needs that at some times were nonexistent and legion in others.

It had been almost a year. It feels like 90.

“More coffee?” the waitress asked, voice pitched like she anticipated breaking through his fugue, but he had smelled her coming.

She’s fine but she’s sweet, like maraschino cherries, and it made him wrinkle his nose in distaste. He’s getting mature enough already to know what he likes and she isn’t it, even if she had been attentive checking in on the coffee that he hasn’t had a goddamn sip of yet. Regular food still fucks with his stomach, he expected he had another couple of decades before he can fake eat something to complete satisfaction.

He managed a sideways look towards her, eyes barely making it to hers around the edges of the black hood he had pulled up, looking like a reject of some tragic Boston basement band. “I’m still working on it, thanks,” he brushed off, voice quiet, pitched low enough that she might not have a reaction to it.

From the way he can hear her breath pick up, just a tiny bit, just enough to grimace at, he failed. That’s the other challenge of it, the one that he had secretly laughed at when David had told him about it because only an asshole with a face like his could complain about the way people threw themselves at him. Poor David, poor handsome David who had to beat humans of literally all flavors off of himself just to get some damn peace and quiet, how hard it must be.

That’s what he had thought. Now he knows better.

The Look is no joke, not even in the slightest and not even for Joe, who knows that even as a pitch-perfect vampire there are elements of his face that he would have needed to start laying the groundwork to change when he was 13 to look halfway presentable. He knows what he looks like, but since the change people have fallen at his feet like he was a ye olde Backstreet Boy, drawn in by the seeming forcefield of pheromones that surrounded him.

So now having a minute alone, something he’s fairly fucking used to, is a relatively rare thing.

The waitress’ neck muscles tightened, gathering to speak, and he turned his face away quickly to look out the front window just beside him.

“Thank you,” he repeated, the words warping with the sudden rush of saliva through his mouth, pushing a bit through the words to send a rush of: go, go, go.

So compelled, she turned on her heel and left without a word, pace stuttering as she crossed back behind the counter like she couldn’t quite believe what she had done, whether she ought to question it at all.

Stifling a groan, he tugged the hood down lower over his face, hand curling against his forehead as he slouched inward, eyes moving back to stare towards his screen. Mechanically, he reached up to click harshly at the Reload button, watching the momentary spin, before feeling his spirit sink gently as the page before him remained unchanged.

No news. No updates. Nothing but the same old headline he’d been staring at for two months, a bleak, black line above the picture of Babe and Gene at their engagement party, smiling and so beautifully, terribly unknowing.

If he scrolled down a bit he knows he’d see isolated photos of George Luz, maybe even the shape of Joe Toye’s name in the footprints of text all the way down the page.

But no more. Not since September.

He’d say it was inconceivable, but in the past years he’s seen too much to rule out even the most fantastic

Dully, he swiveled his gaze to look back out to the empty parking lot, only his own car looking back at him, the sky like a heavy roof of shadows above. It was close to 2a.m. now, pretty much the only time that he could have time to himself in the 24 hour Denny’s he posted at to leech off the wifi, and he felt a wriggle of all too familiar anxiety go through him at even the most distant thought of the sun rising. The sun meant aches, meant feeling sick, tired in a way vampires shouldn’t be tired, and at least for tonight it meant going back home and having to face David.

Beyond the parking lot were the woods, the modest sweep of forest that bordered the town like a crescent moon, blocking them in between the wilderness and the rolling crash of the water, and his eyes got lost in their dark tangle, in their winds and bends. He imagined walking into them, getting lost, having nobody to come looking for him, and he lowered his head down to rest on the table, feeling altogether too human.

He does feel it, if even just a little. It’s hard to hurt a vampire, but since September he’s gotten better and better at finding the places where he could still hurt himself. Hurt other people.

Turns out just because he gets better in some senses doesn’t mean he’s better in all. He’s still just as apt to be horrible as he ever was, lash out, feel bad about lashing out, feel trapped by the weight of guilt and how it mingles together with raw, primordial sadness. Just because he’s a vampire doesn’t mean he’s completely divorced himself from the same type of bullshit he pulled as an idiot running around in 3 day old pants that smell like gin and cigarettes, he’s self-aware enough to admit that.

Maybe it isn’t the vampirism he had hoped would really change him, maybe it was the Being in a Stable Relationship he had thought might do the trick.

But no, still an asshole.

He’d feel disappointed in himself if he was capable of feeling anything but a sort of paralyzing sadness.

He wishes he could call Babe. The thought shot a dart of ice cold pain through his heart, and he bent into it with masochistic relish chased eagerly by helplessness, like dogs after a rabbit. Babe had probably had the same thought a hundred times this last year and Joe hadn’t been there, so he supposed he gets what he deserves in this instance. If only it didn’t hurt so much, if only Joe had had the stones to own up to the hazy unreality that he walked in now, where the world is somehow exactly as it had been and yet forever changed, forever darkened by love like a bruise over an eye.

Eye, eye, eye. I, I, I.

It’s why they had fought. Why he had taken this anger, this hurt, and made it into something solid and unyielding that he could hit David with. Because Joe blamed himself for all of it, for leaving, for changing, for believing that life and the people he had known inside of it would wait until he was strong, ready, and not go on and on until, suddenly, it was gone.

But that hadn’t been what he said. What he’d said to David’s face was: it’s your fault, you made me this way, if it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t have left.

He’d known it wasn’t true even as he said it, but the way the guilt flew from his body and seemed to slam into David’s was a momentary balm, the kind of relief that sleep used to bring him. The feeling was fleeting, no more than a moment, and an entirely new kind of guilt had replaced it as David’s face, his pale, beautiful face, had frozen, shuttered, and was gone. Joe hadn’t even been able to make his mouth work to speak, to take it back, and realized as fast as anything that he hadn’t changed at all. Here he is, still making the same mistakes.

Apologies don’t come easy to him, they clog up his mouth like stones until he can’t make the sound of them, can’t spit them out or swallow them down and only learn to hold their weight. He makes them, but rarely means them, or let himself feel them, allows them to be little more than platitudes.

But he finds he wants to apologize now. He wants it so badly that his silent, cold chest is throbbing with it.

To Babe, to Gene, but most especially to David.

David had been afforded so few choices in the improbable time he’d been walking the earth, had been offered so little consolation for the things that had happened to him, what he’d had to endure and what he’d had to do just to stay on the earth long enough for Joe to find him again. And he’d let Joe choose for himself, to leave and to change, the two choices that David had never gotten. Joe had known, deep in his bones, threaded all the way through his heart, that had he chosen to be human forever, to let himself slip and fall down the long path towards death, David would have let him do it. He was full of the kind of grace that Joe never was, maybe never could be.

Joe had known it all, and had said the words anyway.

It’s worse than an insult. It’s blaming David for something he never had control over in the first place.

The Joe that David had fallen in love with would never have done something like that. He had chosen to die rather than live without him.

What a waste of whatever goodness he might have had then, and then, and now. He owed David more. He owed himself more.

It’s a paralyzing breed of shame, an isolating kind. He knows he has to apologize, he wants to apologize, and hanging over the top of it like a heavy crown was the fear that it wouldn’t be accepted, that he’d fall victim to the same curse that David had and walk the earth alone for a century just hoping to find love again. Wouldn’t he deserve it?

God, he wishes he could drink that coffee right now. Wishes he could have something other than this horrible crush of pain inside himself.

Unless he wanted to go back behind the counter and eat. But he doesn’t feel all that inclined to cherries right now, and it's getting to be too late to find anything prime on a weeknight.

There should be vampire Lexapro, it’s too much work to have to purposefully hunt someone down just to get a taste for a couple of hours before it burns off. Maybe he and David should finally watch True Blood, maybe that’s something they do in fake Louisiana. If he’s forgiven, that is.

He should be hungry. He should want and want and want, never stop wanting, until maybe one day he shrivels up like a dead flower and turns into dust and makes the world look just a tiny bit dirtier because he lived in it.

David would be right not to forgive him, but Joe knows that he will. He waited 100 years for Joe, he gave him a choice with no privisos, and Joe knows that he’ll forgive this but it doesn’t make the guilt any better, in fact it makes it all worse. How can Joe ever repay him? How can he let him know that the 100 years of waiting, of thinking the love they’d shared in another life was all gone, was worth it? So far he’s done a shit fucking job of it.

Joe never thought he’d be married, but here he is. It’s deeper than a marriage, the bond they had made, the vow he took, powerful enough that once given a single taste it had stopped his heart forever.

And he might still be human enough to want to honor something like that, even in the moments when he’s weak. He had said it many times, to many people, holding them back as they tried to leave, making promises, fighting for something intangible: but I can change.

He’d changed. But there can always be more, right? This is where it starts.

A chilling, chilling thought; that wide swath of eternity that stretched out ahead of him was only the beginning, and all over the horizon were pieces of lightning, rolls of thunder, mistakes he’s yet to make, apologies he’ll drop at David’s feet. It’s like being a child all over again, except this time he knows just how black the world can be.

Oh, but how bright as well. How soft, and warm, and ready to envelop him in its arms and carry him to different places, happiness bursting from every pore like light, like he was made of something better, incredible and impervious. He had almost forgotten it when he met David, had to pry the doors of himself open to let the sweetness of it in, and ever since he’s felt it every day. Not from sunrise to sunset, sometimes for no more than a minute, but each day of their union David makes him happier than he’d ever dreamed he could be.

He feels himself roused from his newborn’s sleep, the non-sleeping trance he’ll go into as he adjusts to nonstop wakefulness, by David’s hands each day. The way the old self had loved to be touched, the way that David remembered to touch him, the way that Joe had learned he had wanted to be touched all his life. Fingers rubbing up along his hairline, down the line of his forehead, against his temples, soothing the ghosts of Joe’s stress, his worries, with nothing but the warmth of his hand.

He’s only whole at all because David put him back together.

Love is a many splendored thing…

Over the speaker the song begins, low as a drawl through his ears, and he slumped back against his seat to look out once more towards the parking lot, to the lonely mound of his car in the center of the tableau.

But his car isn’t so alone anymore.

In the high, white lights of the lot he spots the silhouette of a figure perched on the hood of his car, back to the window, face tilted out towards the woody area just beyond beneath the brim of a dark blue, almost black, hood.

Joe sighed, and smiled as he caught himself doing it, feeling relieved and filled with dread. He made himself move methodically, trying not to look as hurried as he felt, as eager to run out to him, as he packed up his laptop, stowed it away, tossed a $20 down next to his cup of cold coffee. The waitress hung back behind the counter, scrolling away on her phone and not looking up as Joe passed, and he moved away from her scent gratefully, the bell above the door tinkling above his head as he moved out to the cold beauty of the night air. It’s cold enough that he should have had to burrow deeper in his coat, but he moved through it like a knife through butter, unflinching, eyes locked on the lone figure atop his car.

At his approach David didn’t turn to face him, but he didn’t need to. Joe knew he was heard, expected, and he sat beside him easily, keeping a scant few inches between their bodies like the words he had spat out formed an invisible wall. His profile is set, perfect, his eyes anchored towards the wooded horizon blankly, pupils flat in the way Joe knows now means he’s eaten, lips like a poisonous bud resting placidly, the threat of its bloom sending a shiver through Joe that had nothing to do with temperature.

“David…” he ventured, soft, a little creep across the silence. “Please say something.”

David barely reacted to his voice, eyes falling down to the ground like dead leaves. “I don’t know what to say to you, Joe.”

“Tell me to go fuck myself,” Joe said, low and strained with the reminder of his pain. “Let fly on me, I can take it.”

“I’m not going to do that,” he replied gently, eyes still held just beyond Joe’s reach.

Joe felt a psychosomatic tightness in his throat, unable to tell anymore where real pain began and his remembered responses ended, trying to think of when he won’t even remember how to fake the feeling of a flush, the urge to hide away. “I’m so sorry, David.”

He nodded under the protection of his hood. “I know it.”

“I forgive you,” David said simply, still sounding a million miles away from where they sat beside each other.

He ached to reach out to him, but held himself back. “I didn’t mean it, I…” he fumbled, closing his eyes like he could look for sense just behind his eyelids. “I wanted you to feel like shit because I feel like fucking shit, I didn’t mean any of it.”

“You don’t need to forgive me right now,” Joe shook his head, brow furrowed and jaw clenched. “I just need you to tell me you know I didn’t mean it.”

David finally looked to him, the line of his mouth thick with tension. “You did mean it.”

His hands twitched beside him, reaching out just to pull back before they could latch onto David’s face. “No, I didn’t. I’m a bastard, I wanted to hurt you and I obviously did, but I never meant it, David. Never.”

“But it’s true,” David insisted, solid and unyielding, his eyes cold in the night.

Joe let himself break the tiniest bit, unable to stop from taking David’s hand in his own, the two of them cold to the touch, small traces of warmth that may or may not be there between their palms. “You think for one second I would do something I didn’t want to do?” he challenged, David’s hand pliant between the twin pressures of his own. “I chose this, not you, none of this shit is your fault.”

“I should have been better,” David said quietly, eyes sliding from Joe’s eyes, down his face, down to the ground. “Should have asked you to reconsider -”

“I wouldn’t have listened,” Joe said, low and sure, David’s eye falling in reverse, back to Joe’s with that terrible, palpable fragility Joe sometimes forgets he has inside him at all. “No matter what you’d have done, I would have chosen you every time.”

David looked at him reservedly, the shadow of doubt in his eyes, but he let Joe hold his hand anyway.

He’s too good. Joe loves him too much.

“I’m sorry,” he said, the words willing and eager to be free from his body, offering themselves out to David like golden barbs, little sharp things that Joe keeps hidden away inside himself. But if anyone deserves them - has ever deserved them, it’s David. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry about -” David began, hushed, mouth bunched at the corners like he wasn’t sure he should say it at all. “About your friends.”

It’s another arrow of fire through his chest, and he smothers its flames by bringing David’s hand to his mouth, pressing a worshipful kiss to the soft, cool skin at the back of his hand. “It's not your fault I wasn’t there,” he said, the truth singing his tongue, no less painful in its accuracy, in the stinging thought that what happened to them - whatever it had been - would have happened whether Joe had been there or not.

“And it’s not your fault, either,” David countered, earnest as he ever was.

Joe doesn’t know if he believes that. He knows it’s the truth, but he can’t believe in it.

But he’ll try. If it means there’s a chance to be forgiven he’ll try, and as he does it he’ll keep hope alive in his silent heart as best he can. The same as he’s sure Babe did for him.

Joe gave in, weak and pitiful and undeserving of the way David didn’t flinch away from him as he bends, slumps against him until he can wrap his arms around him fully, hold him closer than he ever held anyone else in that long-ago life.

“You made me better than I was,” he rasped, face pressed in against the thick fabric of the other man’s hood, heartened by the way David went loose against him, his hands sliding over the plane of Joe’s back. “You’re the only reason I ever wanted to be better. I left because I love you,” he rambled, a hushed, hurried string of words that were no less stinging in their truths. “Tell me you know that.”

David held his silence long enough that Joe began to feel the individual parts of himself begin to separate, split like the joints of a marionette.

“I came back to you,” Joe said, the words coming almost before he thought them. “I think I loved you before I even knew you.”

Tipping into the embrace, David turned his face into Joe’s presence, nose pushing at the brim of his hood until it fell back and he kissed against Joe’s hair, tender and kind. “I wanted so much better for you,” he said, soft enough that its edges crack around his voice, his hands tight across Joe’s shoulders. “But I was selfish.”

Joe scoffed, touched and devastated. “You fucker,” he chastised, pulling back to look David in the face, curling his hand around the line of his neck, holding him close and refusing to let his eyes get away once more. “There isn’t anything better than you. Not for me.”

Smile weighed down at the corners by a peculiar sadness, David brought his hand to Joe's face, smoothing his thumb along his cheekbone and giving a slow shake of his head. “I forget how young you are,” he said, something like wonder in his voice. “You have a thousand lifetimes to realize just how wrong you are about me.”

“Bullshit,” Joe shot back, pulling him in to press a kiss against the pale peak of his cheekbone, sighing a worthless sigh at the feel of David’s eyelashes against his skin. “I’ll spend a thousand lifetimes coming back to you.”

David smiled again, soft and yet luminescent, like candlelight against Joe’s face, and he let Joe come to him readily, taking his face and steadying him into a kiss that made the brittle pieces of his soul tremble inside with want, with love. His mouth moved beneath Joe’s own unquestioningly, allowing itself to be kissed, kissed, his hands against Joe’s back pressing into the muscles there, easing an ache that was no longer felt. With gentle insistence he coaxed David’s mouth open, slipping his tongue into the other man’s mouth to taste the hours he’d missed: something heavy, rich, perfect the way expensive meat used to melt in his mouth and become elemental, coagulated power.

The way it still was, in the night. In the blood.

Above them the faded, white tones of the lamps high above the parking lot suddenly flared, becoming fistfuls of neon stars that hummed loudly with the rush of their affection before bursting into explosions of glass, sparks lighting their death down to the ground. Behind them he could see the illumination of the restaurant's front window as it abruptly screamed into overload, lights bright, bright, bright, and then dying in the space of a moment, the music slumping, garbling away and leaving them in their blessed, familiar dark.

David huffed a laugh against his mouth, and Joe’s eyes were powerful enough in the dark to see the pleased turn of his lips as he kissed his cheek, his jaw. “You need to be more careful.”

“That was you, too,” Joe brushed off, pushing a hand through the other man’s hair and moving the hood back and off to give his face to the moonlight. “I’m sorry.”

“I know you are,” David nodded, his own hand moving to curl against Joe’s neck, eyes gleaming in the shadows with understanding.

Joe opened his mouth, began to apologize again, but thought better of it and simply kissed him once more, sloppy and needful the way he so often felt. Releasing a long sound into the grasp of the kiss, David pulled him in closer, the two of them sliding slightly against the hood of the car in the growing chill, and Joe let himself be moved, allowing the pace to be set. It’s just another moment where by all accounts he should look down at his existence and be baffled by how the strange is now routine, how though he can no longer create his own warmth he finds it in the arms of another. How he can allow himself to be forgiven as easily as he can ask for it.

He’ll change for the better. Hopefully he changes and never stops changing.

For now he’ll settle for being grateful to be given the chance at all.

Grateful enough to test just the slightest bit.

Planting his feet against the hood of the car, Joe tightened his grip over David’s shoulders, pulling out of the kiss long enough to speak. “Hold on,” he said, low and teasing, smiling at the way David first frowned and then rolled his eyes. “And don’t help me.”

“It’s hard not to,” David sighed, but kept a loose grip over Joe’s body as he concentrated, eyes fluttering, before he tentatively reeled him into another, softer kiss. Slowly he began to feel it thrumming under his skin, flowing through his veins like silver cords that eased him up, up, easily enough that he barely paid attention as David deepened the kiss, letting Joe’s insistence guide them up until together they were barely braced on their feet. Making a pleased sound, Joe smiled and tipped his face up to the sky as his feet left the hood of the car, David’s body pressed against his own as they floated, dangling up high, and then higher in the dark with no light to illuminate the way save for the touch of the moon. It’s his favorite of all the things his new body can do, this nothing power, good only for moments like these when he needs the earth itself to fall away under his feet.

It still had a reaction on him, exertions like speed, strength. In his mouth he felt his fangs prick up, and he pulled in David’s entirety eagerly, desperate for scent, for taste, and finding them both held surely in his arms. As they kissed he let himself scrape against David’s lips with the tip of one of the fangs, the sweet, deep scent of vampire blood filling his senses, and he put his mouth to it urgently.

“You’re incredible,” David said on the edge of a laugh, delighted by thoughts Joe only wished he could hear.

“I had a good teacher.”

“You’ll be invincible in a year,” he went on, tipping back into the kiss messily, letting the air swirl around them as they floated above the darkened parking lot of a Denny’s. “In five, I can’t begin to imagine.”

Humming disinterestedly, Joe pressed a red kiss against David’s cheek, pulling in the smell of cypress, amber, comfort and indulgence in one. “You won’t have to imagine, you’ll be there with me.”

David accepted the kiss, turning his face to the promise and setting his own against the inky strands of Joe’s hair. “I will be.”

There must be goodness left inside of him, even now, to have earned something like this. He’ll try not to waste any more of it.

#webgott #down comes the night #vampires love denny's #as they should #stop Thinking and start Kithing 2k22

5 notes · View notes

nighttiming · 2 months

Text

something something vampire analogies in reference to macdennis something something

#iasip #it’s always sunny in philly #it’s always sunny in philadelphia #mac mcdonald #dennis reynolds #macdennis #macden #everyone listen to vampiro 66 by susto it’s them #‘promise i won’t bite / i’ll just get you high and i still wanna bleed you dry’#please i love allusions to vampirism and catholicism and bloody messy codependent love

21 notes · View notes

ecoamerica · 1 month

Text

youtube

Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc

The recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by student climate leaders! Join Aishah-Nyeta Brown & Jerome Foster II and be inspired by student climate leaders as we recognize the High School Student finalists. Watch now to find out which student received the $25,000 grand prize and top recognition!

16K notes · View notes

dare-g · 2 years

Photo

The Mad Love Life of a Hot Vampire (1971)

#the mad love life of a hot vampire #ray dennis steckler #jim parker #carolyn brandt #jason wayne #will long #talks

8 notes · View notes

lanadelnegan · 9 months

Text

Warnings: all 18+ and contain smut. minors DNI.

Negan Smith

Oneshots:

Daddy Issues - stepdad!Negan

Smarty Pants - Negan shows his appreciation after you explain how to make a bullet.

Down Bad - Coach Negan x F!Reader

Video Games - giving Negan head while he plays video games

Knock Knock - DeadCity!Negan fucks you while Maggie is gone on a run

Our Little Cabin - Cowboy era Negan takes your virginity

My Girl - Rick's oldest daughter, y/n, loses her virginity to Negan

Pretty in Pink - Negan can't resist you in your little pink skirt

You Belong to Me - Negan x Male Reader

Vampire - Negan eats you out while you're on your period

Keep Me Warm - Public sex with Negan in Alexandria

Two In One - Negan x Reader x Simon threesome

Cherry - Negan ‘pops your cherry’

The Notebook - movie night with Negan (fluff)

Multi-chapter:

Lip Gloss - Prisoner!Negan falls for a girl at Alexandria. (complete)

My Past, My Future - Negan x Reader x Daryl / love triangle (complete)

Crush - gym teacher negan x student reader (complete)

Tattoo - Teacher!Negan gives his student a tattoo. (complete)

Ghost - Negan x Glenn'sSister!Reader (complete)

Jeffrey Dean Morgan

Oneshots:

Wildest Dreams - Your celeb crush makes your dreams come true when you meet him at a bar after the walking dead comic con.

Jealousy, Jealousy - Your boyfriend, Jeffrey, can't control his jealousy when he sees another man hit on you at the bar.

Love at First Sight - you ask Jeffrey a question at a walking dead panel that leads to the memory of a lifetime.

Multi-chapter:

One Night Stand - Denny Duquette era Jeffrey has a one night stand with his costar. (in progress)

Denny Duquette

Oneshots:

Cardiac Arrest - You give your favorite patient special treatment

928 notes · View notes

d4yl1ghts · 2 months

Text

masterlist

Bridgerton

-Anthony Bridgerton:

attached

flashback

guilt

only you

pleasure

unfair (1)

unfair (2)

-Colin Bridgerton:

enjoyment

hope for the future

saviour

-King George:

venus

-Simon Basset:

designer

new desires

Grey’s Anatomy

-Alex Karev:

soft

-Denny Duquette:

i’m the one with an irregular heartbeat

-Derek Shepherd:

forever

-Mark Sloan:

be careful

change

chief

stuck

Star Wars

-Anakin Skywalker:

safe

nightmares

-Han Solo:

there is good in the bad

The Hunger Games

-Finnick Odair:

i’ve got you

-Peeta Mellark:

cowboy

hunger

opposites attract

summer love

The Maze Runner

-Minho:

welcome to the glade

The Vampire Diaries Universe

-Damon Salvatore:

allure

-Klaus Mikaelson:

loss

-Stefan Salvatore:

it’s okay

#masterlist #anthony bridgerton x reader #stefan salavatore x reader #anakin skywalker x reader #peeta mellark x reader #colin bridgerton x reader #derek shepherd x reader #alex karev x reader #mark sloan x reader #simon basset x reader #king george x reader #finnick odair x reader #minho x reader #damon salvatore x reader #klaus mikaelson x reader #denny duquette x reader #han solo x reader

99 notes · View notes

hungiehipo · 14 days

Text

My top 8 favorite Macdennis fanfiction

So I've officially run through all the macdennis fics available (if I'm being honest there ARE definitely some that I did not finish for various reasons such as high school AUs that felt a little weird to read in my mid twenties). It took 8 months. Probably will do as suggested and just start rereading. Something very comforting about reading the same plot run through over and over and over lol.

I do not claim to have amazing or superior taste, but these ones all stood out to me as being exceptionally unique, interesting, or well characterized out of the thousands of stories on A03.

Also if you want recs/want to give me recs my inbox is super open :) I crave to talk to the people

42,679 words- complete

Dennis lives groundhog day/is stuck in a time loop repeating the same day over and over.

73,131 words- Finished and has a part 2

Starts end of season 12/ Dennis' double life. Dennis turns into a vampire basically and its really good.

42,309 words- TRAGICALLY ABANDONED

2017 Mac and Dennis are sent through a time portal to 2005 where they meet their younger selves. Mac and young Dennis are separated from Dennis and young Mac. Something happens and Mac/ old Dennis are sent back to the future while Mac/young Dennis are stuck in the past. So good until abruptly ending with no resolution sadly.

27,325 words- COMPLETE!

Macs dad dies. Him and Dennis go on a road trip to Mexico to spread his ashes.

33,224 words- Complete!

Dennis gets a heart rate monitor watch and the gang tries to help him lower his blood pressure. Post season 16.

51,228 words- IN PROGRESS

This one is being actively updated but I love it so I included it. Dennis agrees to date Mac for one day to get it out of his system so he can finally move on.

12,609 words- Finished!

Heaters broken and they are forced to share a sleeping bag. Similar to only one bed trope but better!!!

63,955 words- NOT COMPLETE, supposedly not abandoned but also has not been updated in over a year.

Mac has amnesia back to when he was in the closet and Dennis pretends to be his husband when he wakes up.

#iasip #macdennis #dennis reynolds #mac macdonald #dennis iasip #Mac iasip #this was going to be 10 but any others I really liked were pretty similar or on the same level of personal enjoyment for me #Also seeing as there's soooo many there's a 100 percent chance I forgot to include some that Ive lost/forgotten to bookmark

61 notes · View notes

ecoamerica · 2 months

Text

youtube

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

15K notes · View notes

borninwinter81 · 2 months

Text

Queer horror from my teens

I periodically wonder whether these books are still known and read by young goths and horror fans as they were all extremely important to me in my teenage years, so I thought I'd share them.

Though I'm cishet, during the mid 90s two of my favourite authors wrote primarily queer fiction: they were Anne Rice and another author from New Orleans who is now known as Billy Martin.

He came out as a trans man in 2011, however these books were published prior to that so unfortunately you have to search for them under his deadname. This is why I've used that name in the tags on this post. I don't believe the books were ever reprinted with his current name.

Though I loved Rice, I always felt a more immediate connection with Martin due to his vivid portrayal of subcultures like goth and punk, and how it felt to be a teenager who was part of them. I could see myself in many of his characters as I had the same interests, listened to the same music, and shared the same sense of social alienation. Remember in the 90s the Internet was still a reasonably new thing, and many of us didn't have a home Internet connection at all. There was certainly no social media, no YouTube, and no real way to meet and interact with like-minded teens unless you were lucky enough to have another "weird kid" at your school. If you were a weird kid, you likely had very few friends and were bullied.

That as much as anything else led me to seek solace in books written by an author who I felt understood me, and characters who became my friends.

Lost Souls is about vampires in a kind of Lost Boys/Near Dark way. Fans of the YouTuber OfHerbsAndAltars might be interested to know that this book is where the name of his channel comes from - it's a description of the taste of Chartreuse liqueur.

Drawing Blood is about ghosts, a "murder house", computer hacking, comic art and a very beautiful (if rather messed up) romance. This one is probably my favourite of the three.

Exquisite Corpse is about serial killers, set against the AIDS crisis of the 90s. If you like the Hannibal TV series you'll probably enjoy this one - imagine if Dennis Nilsen and Jeffrey Dahmer had somehow met.

Martin doesn't pull any punches when it comes to descriptions of blood and gore, violence, abusive parents or his portrayal of toxic romantic relationships (of which there are many in his books), but if you can deal with those things there is also a great deal of beauty, phenomenally good writing, and a somewhat unique perspective on the supernatural.

Maybe I'm biased, looking at these through the lens of my teenage self. Maybe they'd seem horribly dated to today's young audience. But I still wanted to make this post in case there's someone out there who will end up loving them as much as I did.

134 notes · View notes

escapedaudios · 4 months

Text

Ok future series planned, with introductory synopses.

My Greasefire Life (Slice of Life, Satiric Comedy): A theater school graduate relegated to working at a Burger restaurant with a theatrical gimmick befriends a night shift server from the Denny's that he dramatically broke up with his girlfriend at. On the same night, he befriends the profoundly stupid but oddly wise rugby player that his girlfriend cheated on him with. Together they try and fix their pathetic lives.

Neon Memoriam (Drama, Supernatural, High Romance): After helping to set Raven's life right from beyond the grave, the haunting ghost of Crow ponders his purpose. He is met by a swan, who reveals herself as a beautiful scythe-wielding angel clad in white. She is the angel of death that was meant to take his soul to the afterlife years ago, but for some reason was unable to. Together they he accompanies her through her day to day life as a reaper, as they explore Crow's own life and death to come to understand his nature and destiny.

Matador Oscuro (Action Adventure, Gothic Horror, Drama): 24 years after the events of Matador Gothic, a newly turned vampire couple struggles to survive in a compound of fledgling vampires. The vampires quickly turn on each other to compete for prey and power. To worsen matters, a deadly attack by a Matador Gótico named Diego Villaba (son of Alfonso Villaba) on their compound sends them running. As the sole survivors, these two not-quite-in-love lovers resolve to go on a journey of vengeance across Spain to find the vampire who turned them into monsters and destroy him, all while being relentlessly pursued by Diego Villalba.

My True Love is Dead (Slash and Basher sequel): After the events of the Reddening, time is unable to turn back in Slasher's world. Slash ressurects naturally as a ghoul, a natural ability of slashers, but Basher does not. Learning from the Reaper that this is because Slash has supplanted Basher's territory by surviving The Void Maverick a few minutes longer, they make a deal with death to go on a dangerous quest to ressurect the Basher.

Blue Infinity Season Two (Nautical Fantasy, Alternate History): After being captured by the feared pirate Blind Simon, Lass learns the reason why Simon seeked her out. Knowing that her pendant has something to do with ending The Drift, Simon resolves to destroy it, knowing that the end of The Drift would mean the end of pirate domination over the Blue Infinity. When she refuses, she flees overboard and is rescued by Fletcher and a siren who's voice Simon once loved. Together they go on a journey to end The Drift, culminating in a battle of destiny against Blind Simon and the crew of Persephone's Bleeding Heart.

I'm going to make this happen come hell or high water god damnit. Desmond ASMR is still in, though it's gonna take some patience from me.

#escaped audios #the neon barbarian #matador gothic #my greasefire life #blue infinity

75 notes · View notes

candycandy00 · 1 year

Text

This is the Welcome Post and the Fanfic Masterlist!

Requests for full fanfics are closed indefinitely! Choose Your Own Price Commissions are currently open! See info about commissioning me here.

Requests for Headcanons are currently open!

Headcanons are just my opinions on things, like how I think the characters would react to certain things or how they would behave in certain situations. Examples: “How would Shigaraki react to his girlfriend naming her pet cat after him?” Or “How would the JJK guys behave if you dragged them to a Denny’s at 3am?”

About Me

I’m currently 39 😱 I’m obsessed with the color pink and I’m a country girl (born, raised, and currently live in the Appalachian mountains). I speak with a thick southern accent. I collect figures. I’m a huge nerd in every way. I love comic books (both manga and American comics), video games (mostly JRPG’s, Otome/Dating Sims, and Survival Horror), Star Wars, Kaiju/Tokusatsu, and all things Horror. I read a lot, mostly fantasy and horror. I grew up in a conservative religious household and I’m still trying to unlearn a lot of bullshit, so please bear with me.

I write for two fandoms currently: Boku no Hero Academia and Jujutsu Kaisen. I might write for others at some point and I’ve written tons for other fandoms over the years. I also write original fiction. I would deeply appreciate any support (reblogs/comments/likes) for my original stuff because that’s where my true passion lies. I’m somewhat slow with posting updates to my fics but I promise I’m trying. I tag my x Reader fics with the x reader tag so that people who hate x reader can filter it out easily. I haven’t always done this so I’m in the process of going back and properly tagging everything.

I mostly post my writings here. It’s mostly fanfiction but there are some headcanons and opinionated rants here and there. I’m trying to go back and tag them all. You can look for the tags “Jjk headcanons” and “bnha headcanons” (that’s what I’ll be tagging them). Otherwise I mostly just reblog fanart and gif sets. I reblog fanfiction over on @candycandyreblogs. Consider it a curated library of excellent stories. Feel free to follow it! Every fanfic on there is amazing!

I’m always up for making friends! So feel free to message me and chat!

Boku no Hero Academia:

Shigaraki, Dabi, Mr. Compress, Twice, Spinner, Hawks.

Jujutsu Kaisen:

Sukuna, Gojo, Geto, Toji, Nanami, Choso.

No minors, no animals, no scat/pee/vomit.

I’m fine with dark content/rape/horror/gore/etc. I can do NSFW or SFW. Please specify if it’s not clear in your request.

Please specify the gender of the Reader (any gender is fine, no gender is fine).

That’s it! Anon is always on!

Feel free to ask me questions, give me suggestions, or just chat!

Headers by @kuroov

Just a list of the fics I've written so far so you can easily find what you'd like to read! If I've missed a fic or have a bad link or anything, please let me know!

All fics are arranged newest to oldest! All fics are 18+ and contain smut, as well as have Fem Readers, unless stated otherwise!

Shigaraki x Reader

Shower Duty (Prison AU, Noncon/Dubcon)

Office Life (Gender Neutral Reader, Dub Con, Violent Fantasies)

The Scarecrow Walks at Night (Halloween fic, Shig as a Scarecrow)

Tentacle Tomura (Tentacles, Anal)

The Pirate and the Mermaid (AU) (Three Parts!)

Too Intense For you? (BDSM)

Reader Uses Mind Control Quirk on Shig

Dark Carnival Chapter 1 (Whips, Blood, Death)

Playing a Fighting Game - Loser has to Strip

Shy Reader Giving Shig a Christmas Present

Sitting on Shig's Lap While he Plays Games

Exhibitionism

Shig Corrupts Shy Hero's Sidekick Reader

Size Kink - Shig With Short Reader

Mommy Kink

Breath Play/Choking

Break Time (Reader is a Waitress with a Crush on Shig)

Dabi x Reader

Count Touya (Dabi as a Vampire, Bondage)

Waxwork (Dabi as a Vampire + Werewolf)

The Visitors (Post Ending, Touya in Prison) NO SMUT

Zombie Apocalypse AU (Four Parts!)

Dabi Under a Lust Quirk

Dabi with Innocent Nun Reader

Piercing/Torture

Teasing that Leads to Rape/Non-Con

Trending Topics (Dabi Sees Reader's Pervy Tweets About Him)

Lazy Sex

Breeding Kink

Mr. Compress X Reader

The Experiment (Horror, Gore, Halloween Fic, Compress as a mad scientist)

Dark Carnival Chapter 2 (Blood, Gore, Death)

Mr. Compress x Reader With Bunny Quirk

Twice x Reader

Dark Carnival Chapter 3 (Horror, Blood, Gender Neutral Reader) (Three Parts!)

Non-X Reader

League of Villains Heroes (Set after the end of the manga, the League has split up and are in therapy, but a new threat turns them into reluctant heroes.) Multi-Chapter. NO SMUT. (In Progress!)

Unmerry Christmases (Platonic ShigaDabi) NO SMUT

AFO x All Might Aladdin AU Master/Slave Dub-Con

Sukuna X Reader

The Maiden’s Voyage (AU, Sukuna as a pirate captain, Rape/Noncon, Rough Sex, Violence, Sukuna is a cruel monster) (In Progress!)

Father Sukuna’s Discipline (AU, Sukuna as a priest, spanking, rough sex, reader as a nun)

The Doll House (AU, BDSM, Erotic Torture, Needles, Clamps, etc.) (Four Parts!)

Breaking You (Rape/Noncon, Blood, Torture, Humiliation, Double Penetration)

Serve Me, Save Me (Reader is a Rape Victim who joins Sukuna’s Harem after he inadvertently saves her) (In Progress!)

The Offering (Dark, Dubcon, Blood, Rough) (Five Parts!)

Gojo x Reader

The Doll House (AU, Dubcon, Chubby Reader, Pet Play, Anal, Bullying) (Four Parts!)

In The Library (College AU, Gojo and Geto bully Reader, Rape, Dark)

Promotion (Power Dynamics, Reader wants Gojo to promote her to Grade 1)

Christmas Past (Fluff, Drabble, Gojo x Geto in flashback) NO SMUT

Pick Me Up (Gojo x Reader x Geto, Halloween fic, Serial Killer AU) (Five Parts!)

Human (Rape, Torture, Blood, Dark, Reader is a cursed spirit) (Two Parts!)

Little Miss Nobody (Plot, Rough Sex, Gojo is an asshole) (Three Parts!)

Geto x Reader

The Sweetest Torture (Mafia AU, Edging, Handcuffs)

In The Library (College AU, Gojo and Geto bully Reader, Rape, Dark)

The Doll House (Dubcon, Humiliation, Public Nudity, Dom/Sub Dynamics, AU) (Four Parts!)

Pick Me Up (Gojo x Reader x Geto, Halloween fic, Serial Killer AU) (Five Parts!)

Toji x Reader

Forest Guide (Toji as a Werewolf, Rape, Breeding)

His Favorite Target (Toji is hired to kill you)

The Doll House (AU, Size Difference, Age Difference, Cock Drunkenness, Use of Aphrodisiacs) (Four Parts!)

Nanami x Reader

The Stranger at the Bar (AU, Degradation, Size Difference)

The Doll House (AU, Daddy Kink, Spanking, Hair Pulling, Reader is afraid of men.) (Four Parts!)

Choso x Reader

The Doll House (AU, Dom!Reader, Sub Choso, Teasing, Collars, Pegging) (Four Parts!)

Multi-Character

JJK Men as Pervy Mall Santas

Original X Reader

Roses in the Sky (Alien x Reader, Sci-Fi, Novel Length, Romance) (In Progress!)

#shigaraki x reader #dabi x reader #gojo x reader #geto x reader #Toji x reader #bnha x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk x reader #league of villains x reader

532 notes · View notes

maccharliedennis · 7 months

Text

Check it out y'all !!! I drew something to contribute to @malewifemanhunter 's @sunnyhalloweenzine !!!

Every fandom needs at least one or two Monster AUs so here's my take on one for Sunny 🌞💖👻

I really loved doing this and was so glad I got the chance to be part of the zine!!! I low-key want to draw so many more characters for this AU.

🎃 HAPPY HALLOWEEN YALL!!!!! 🎃

More Monstery fun under the cut!!!! 👇👇👇👇

Mac: In my vision of this AU, genetics play a very limited role in what type of monster someone is. Just because someone's parents are vampires doesn't mean they will be one too. But it was still shocking for Mac when he finally came to the conclusion that he was a Cupid instead of a Gargoyle like his father, or an Ash Elemental like his mother. As a Cupid, most of his power is tied to passionate emotion. He's able to influence others emotional states, and can even inspire feelings of love. Or at least, he could if he ever actually practiced using these abilities. It's a lot easier to talk up his powers than it is to put the work into refining them.

Dennis: As a true monster, Dennis possesses limited shape shifting abilities but only uses them to squish himself down into a human skin to avoid being perceived in his true form. To be fair to him though, his true form is more physically vulnerable when exposed. It may look scary, but his skin is easily pierced and most of those appendages evolved for showing off to potential mates, not combat. Or maybe he hides in a skinsuit so that his sexual interests never find out that he has a giant toothy maw with snapping, grabbing pinchers between his legs instead of a dick.

Dee: I rlly wanted to go for monster types that weren't the obvious choice, which is why I opted to make Dee a Wraith instead of a Harpy or Banshee. But like....I knew I had 2 include birds SOMEHOW....hence why her physical form and powers can be effected by psychic energy 🐦 👻. She has the ability to emit a piercing screech that both terrifies and harms those who hear it. She's also able to predict when a tragedy is about to occur, but isn't able to determine whether it will be someone else's tragedy or her own. Unfortunately for her, it usually seems to be the latter.

Charlie: yeah yeah Charlie gets to be extra stuff bc he's my special girl (just like in my Pokemon AU) . His abilities as both a poltergeist and a wererat make him extremely hardy and he's able to withstand almost anything. His poltergeist half can cause problems for him, however, if he tries to venture too far from where his soul is tied to. His abilities are the strongest when he's at these tethering spots (the bar and the waitress), and he quickly becomes extremely weak and almost imperceptible if he goes outside the city limits of Philadelphia. To solve this problem, the Gang has formed a habit of kidnapping the Waitress for any trips they take.

Frank: Frank is here too 🧌. Not much is known for sure about his past and what IS known seems to contradict itself quite frequently. He claims to have made most of his money in the 70s from exploiting monsters of his very own type back on "The Street".

#iasip #always sunny #dennis reynolds #macdennis #charlie kelly #mac mcdonald #dee reynolds #frank reynolds #its always sunny in philadelphia #moi #my art #halloween #monsters #monster au #sunnyween zine

104 notes · View notes

moondustinfj · 6 months

Text

MBTI AND ENNEAGRAM ANALYSIS OF INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE CHARACTERS

Part 1

Louis de Pointe du Lac

Mbti

Introverted Intuitive Feeling Perceiving

Infps are highly idealistic, sensitive and driven by their values

Especially because their leading function Fi (introverted feeling) allows them to be in tune with their emotions. Very much so that they are driven by their inner compass. They have a clear sense of right and wrong and it's not likely or easy for them to change their mind about something, especially moral issues

Armand: I would have made this woman a vampire. But I thought it best you have a hand in it. Otherwise you would not give Claudia up. You must know you wanted it

Louis: I loathe what I did!

Armand: Then loathe me, not yourself

Louis: No, you don't understand. You nearly destroyed the thing you value in me when this happened. I resisted you with all my power even when I didn't know it was your force which was working on me. Something nearly died in me! Passion nearly died in me! I was all but destroyed when Madeline was created!

Armand: But that thing is no longer dead, that passion, that humanity, whatever you wish to name it. If it were not alive there wouldn't be tears in your eyes right now. There wouldn't be rage in your voice

Infps are very emphatatic and sensitive. They want to make the world a better place and they try hard to help others

"But why, with this passion and this sense of justice, do you wish to call yourself the child of Satan!" - Armand

Louis: I'm incapable of your detachment. I know what it is, and I do not possess it and I doubt that I ever will. I accept this

Armand: I understand. I saw you in the theatre, your suffering, your sympathy with that girl. I saw your sympathy for Dennis when I offered him to you; you die when you kill

They are introspective and they desire to find their meaning in life

"It's a terrible feeling, not knowing, not understanding, not being in control of your own destiny" - Louis

"I would have to know from what... from what it comes. Whether it came from other vampires...or elsewhere" - Louis

They focus on the big picture and are very intuitive

"No need to tell him what to observe, or what to remember. He always knew such things. Years ago, when I'd done the dark magic on him, I hadn't had to tell him anything; he had savored the smallest aspects of it all on his own. Then later he said I'd failed to guide him. Didn't he know how unnecessary that had always been?" - Lestat

With their strive for authenticity and their sensitivity, they look for ways to express themselves through art and stories

Enneagram

Basic fear: that they have no meaning or significance

Basic desire: to have their own identity and purpose, their meaning

Type fours are sensitive, self aware and reserved. They are also prone to be moody and self conscious. They can suffer from self pity and melancholy

Type fours see themselves as fundamentally different from other people. More than any other type, they are acutely aware of their weaknesses and defiances. They see themselves as uniquely disadvantaged or flawed

And because they see themselves as so different, they feel like nobody can see their true selves and therefore no one can love them for who they really are

"For the first time in my life, I was seen"

They might romanticize pain and bittersweet feelings

"I think to be this happy is to be miserable, to feel this much satisfaction is to burn"

Type fours often feel like there is something missing in them that others possess. This thing can't be properly identified but they feel like there is a hole in them that can not be filled

"If I ever thought we have souls, mine is gone forever"

So they feel like with this thing missing, everyone but them can fully understand who they are and their meaning

Type fours struggle to let go of their feelings from the past. They nurse their old wounds and hold onto their feelings about people who hurt them

4w5 (four wing five): The Bohemian

This subtype is combined with type five. So they're more reserved than the usual type four. But they're also more observant and speculative

"Louis, the watcher, the patient one, was there on account of love pure and simple"

Overall, infps and type fours are generally sensitive, creative, melancholic, empathatic, understanding, authentic, emotionally expressive and introspective people

"Louis, whose green eyes are soulful, the very mirror of patient misery, soft voiced, very human, weak; having lived only two hundred years, unable to read minds, or to levitate, or to spellbind others except inadvertently, which can be hilarious, an immortal with whom mortals fall in love" -Armand

" And it occured to me. If Louis does end his life, if he does bring his supernatural journey to conclusion, how will I ever answer for it to Lestat or Armand? It was the love of Louis which had at times crippled Lestat, and enslaved Armand" - David

"The first thing I'd ever noticed about him-well, after his green eyes that is- was his black hair. No, all that's a lie. It was his expression; the passion and the innocence and the delicacy of conscience. I just loved it!" - Lestat

"If I knew a mortal of that sensitivity, that pain, that focus, I would make him a vampire in an instant. But such can rarely be done. No, I've had to wait and watch for you. And now I'll fight for you. Do you see how ruthless I am in love?" - Armand

"Louis, my handsome Louis, in his dark wool and old fashioned high-collared linen, gazing down on us with a look of thinly veiled amusement, but with a secret in his hypnotic green eyes" - Lestat

77 notes · View notes

elysia-nsimp · 6 months

Text

I WANT TO PREFACE THIS TWST INCORRECT QUOTES BY STATING THE FOLLOWING:

all of the quotes that are Jamil talking to Kalim are actually me talking to my dog Ivy! It’s a running gag with my friends and I that the stuff I say to Ivy just gets more and more out of context and someone always quotes Jamil when I share a new conversation

Tagging: @queerlordsimon @ladyzsgolla @aetherphobia @thesunshineriptide @end3rm1st (lmk if you want to be added or removed ^^)

Warnings: Cursing, lighthearted bullying, suggestive jokes made by a bunch of asexuals and their token allosexual, caps

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4 // Part 5

——

Ruggie, RUNNING down the hallway screaming: I GOT A POPTAAAAAAARTTTT

——

Idia: Screech was put down by the CDC for being a safety hazard.

——

Deuce: why do you wanna go to school?? you're a fucking EGG!.... dumb bitch...

——

Floyd: he's a merman. thats his merass

——

Azul: I wish this game would let me commit tax fraud

——

Jade: I DO NOT CONSENT TO THE SEXUALIZATION OF MY THREATS

——

Yuu, to Jade: can they go on little slug dates?

——

Floyd: It’s like depression if depression was a fish tank

——

Riddle: Well to me this sounds like colour 1 is a more complex colour that is made from something being added to the base of colour 2. Orange (colour 1) is just yellow (colour 2) but with red added. Similarly, green (colour 1) is just blue (colour 2) but with yellow added. Now how does this apply to purple? Thus far all colour two's have been primary colours (as the primary colours are red, yellow, and blue and so far we have yellow and blue but no red. This means that if we assume the same pattern to be true, the last colour 2 should be red. This also matches up with purple as the final colour 1 since red + blue = purple. Lastly, this enforces another pattern I have noticed. Let's look at the second set to see this pattern. In the second set we have blue (colour 2) + yellow = green (colour 1). Now something iinteresting here is that yellow is colour 2 of the previous set. This pattern continues in set 3. We have red (colour 2) + blue (colour 2 of the last set) = purple (colour 1). Finally, it even goes in a loop. In set one we have yellow (colour 2) + red = orange (colour 1). And what do we see here? That's right, red just so happens to be the colour 2 we determined to be the colour which finishes set 3. Therefore we can conclude from multiple patterns within this set that orange is to yellow as green is to blue as purple is to red.

——

Ace: it’s slightly NSFW, but there’s nothing explicit

Deuce: I’m allosexual, I’ll live

Ace: ok [sends picture]

Deuce: NEVERMIND

——

Trey: Dennys is like, the place you go when you burn your dinner for the holidays

——

Jade: Floyd… we’ve talked about this.

Floyd: about what

Jade: Tormenting the Gods…

——

Azul: If you or a loved one has been attacked by Timothy--

Idia: SCREECH

Azul: or Screech, yes-- [dies to screech]

Azul: ...oh

——

Floyd: this is what i call TRAUMA KARAOKE

——

Epel: the femininity is dwindling and the polyamory is spreading

——

Floyd, to Epel: Are you sustenance?….

——

Kalim: I have never felt more unsafe than with your face.

OB!Jamil: What the fuck.

——

Lilia: one day i will get my revenge. not only on the squirrel population, but the baby population

——

Floyd: There’s like 4.5 trans people in this room

Idia: .5??

Azul: am I the .5

Floyd: yes

——

Idia: Bad and naughty Discord users get put in the PS5 controller

——

Floyd: I am going to UNZIP YOUR SPINE.

——

Azul: This is all an elaborate game of pretend to them.

Floyd: AH YES. GAME OF PRETEND. LIKE HOW YOU KISSED ME ON THE MO U T H FOR PRA CT I CE

——

Epel, behind Vil’s back on why he’s a vampire: It’s because he’s so pasty

——

Kalim: i love sad cheesy romance scenes :)

Jamil: I love plotting evilly

Kalim: I also love plotting evilly but I also love sad cheesy romance scenes :)!!!

——

Jade: Yes, hello. I've been keeping Kalim company.

Floyd: yes 😏 company. and they KISSED ON THE MOUTH GAYLY

Jade, ignoring him: He's been teaching me aaall sorts of things...

Floyd: 😳😳 YEAH GAY THINGS. LIKE KISSING ON THE MOUTH.

Jamil: Answer me. What did you do to Kalim

Jade: What did I...do? We were just having a pleasant conversation.

Floyd: ah yes just a pleasant conversation. DEFINITELY NOT GAYLY KISSING

——

Jade: Out of the benevolence of Azul’s heart, he will let Jamil practice kissing with him.

Kalim: just like Floyd

——

Floyd: SWING THE DICK AT THEM. HELICOPTER DICK TO SCARE THE NINJAS AWAY

Jamil:

Kalim:

——

Trey: is it legal to milk clowns?

Jade: It depends on the clown… it depends on their sins…

Lilia: we dont like being milked actually

——

Ruggie: I wish I cried lemonade... because then I'd cry more often and then I'd have lemonade. And then I wouldn't be sad anymore... but then I'd cry happy tears because I have lemonade, which would make me cry more... and then the cycle repeats...

——

Floyd, in Minecraft: ooohhhHhhH Look at youUUU so KIND and GENEROUS HOUSEWARDEN--

Floyd, getting punched off the mineshaft by Azul: aH FUCK FUCK FUCK

——

Ortho, after Idia showed him many cursed furbys: You owe me a new pair of eyes.

Idia: can they be furby eyes 😀

——

Jack: Maybe the real booty is the friends we made along the way yknow

——

Prof. Trein: Talk amongst yourselves, do not speak in Welsh.

——

Cater: That's how Im gonna start commenting on things now. Just, person adjective

Deuce: Cater uh- nice

Cater, WITHOUT HESITATION: Deuce depressed

——

Che’nya: My emotionally identifying with cats has nothing to do with me being a furry and EVERYTHING to do with me being autistic

——

Yuu, about Grim: Your heart is bigger than your little body!!

Ace: so is his ego

Yuu, laughing: that’s true

——

Silver: you look very intimidating right now

Sebek: Wh- Silver- I am sitting here eating my pocket muffin Silver

——

Deuce: If you poke my eyes I won’t be able to breathe- wait

——

Trey with a slinky over his eyes: New technology makes it more difficult to see! Mobility disaids

——

Cater: You reenter the VC. I turn around in a swivel chair, filing my nails. “I've been expecting you,” I say.

Idia: ...... [disconnects]

——

Jamil, to Kalim: I was wondering about the dust bunny too.. nO, NO, DONT EAT THE DUST BUNNY—

——

Ace: What are we SUPPOSED to do? Hold each other by the toes and sing a friendship song???

——

Lilia: mmmm bacon soap….

Silver:

Malleus:

Lilia:

Silver:

Malleus: …did you just say “bacon soap”?

——

Silver: You DO look intimidating, eating your pocket muffin like an APPLE, staring into the middle distance dramatically

Sebek:

——

Jamil: I really don’t want to touch your… gooey… wet… ball, Kalim.

——

Leona: There’s weed in this tea… Hm. [takes another sip]

——

Jamil: Kalim, stop putting your balls under the greenhouse. I don’t want to keep fishing them out.

——

Floyd: Shrimpy, I want you to know that i am going to shit in your bathroom. just wanted to make sure you knew.

Azul: that is NOT how i expected you to end that sentence

——

Jade: Whatcha doing?

Floyd: Your m—

Floyd:

Jade: Go on.

Floyd:

Jade: Finish the sentence, Floyd.

Floyd:

Jade: Floyd finish the sentence.

——

Idia: THREE ASEXUALS… RECREATING SEX

Vil:

Jade: sex 2

——

Lilia: Reminiscing from the glory days to the whore-y days

——

Silver: I got off the plane, saw someone who was my friend, got hugged, then you TOOK OFF YOUR SHIRT, BIT INTO AN APPLE LIKE A MUFFIN, SAT AGAINST THE WINDOW LIKE A WALL SIT AND STARED AT ME

Sebek:

——

Idia, TERRIFIED: PLEASE DO NOT LOOK TO ME FOR WISDOM I AM FUCKING STUPID

——

Jamil: why do you have to pick the balls to kick that hurt the most, kalim

——

Floyd: I like my men like I like my SCPs… keter class.

——

Jamil: Don’t EAT your tie, Kalim-

——

Jamil: Don’t steal any more frogs Kalim

——